#POSSIBLE- that doesn’t mean they absolutely 100% will happen or something. tldr: just have fun

[designernishiki]

kazumaji nation, if the pairing were to be canonized in y8, how do you imagine it happening? either realistically or ideally. go

[curechocolattymilk]

TES V OC Thingie

[Got tagged by @jessaryss​ ! ]

Pause your game! Wherever your OC is in their game currently, tell me about their story so far.

✧✧✧ General

Current Level: 56

Name: Jeer-Tei Perdes

Name Meaning: Literally got it from a name generator lol. But lore wise it was a name gifted to them in honor of an Argonian who served beside Tei’s mother during the Great War

Pronouns: They/Them

Age: Early 30s where they are story wise???

Race(s): Argonian

Place of Origin: Hammerfell

Pick A Theme Song For Them: oof that's tough... From a Crowded Wound or maybe even Firstwake? If you really played around w personal interpretation/the lyrics that is haha

✧✧✧ Locations

Where Did You Begin Their Game?: Argonian Assemblage, Windhelm (Alternative Start)

Where Are They Currently In Your Game?: Whiterun

What Are They Doing There?: Just finished attending a party held in their honor (Post Blood of Kings)

Homes?: Breezehome, Proudspire, Lakeview & Autmnwatch

# of Locations Discovered?: 274

Dungeons Cleared: 104

Misc. Quests Completed: 87

Favorite Areas and/or Locations: Falkreath / Lakewview Manor. Both areas are where Tei heads off to in order to collect their thoughts/feel some sense of calm.

✧✧✧ Main Quest

Are They Dragonborn / Do They Know It At This Point?: Yes & yes

How Do They Feel About Being Dragonborn: It's...complicated, being thrust into the role of savior by gods of the Cult, which in turn are followed by the folk who see you lesser than them. Tei already has a dislike towards the Divines, this doesn't really help lol

Main Quests Completed: 21

Where Are They In The Main Story Line: Alduin's dead, currently trying to ignore the Civil War as long as they can before the Empire forces its hand into forcing them to join their ranks

Dragon Souls Absorbed: In total overall? 147. The amount currently stored in Tei? 45

Words of Power Learned: 64

Shouts Mastered: 21

Favorite Shout: Firebreath / Dragonrend

✧✧✧ Combat

Most Used Weapon(s): Daedric war axe OR Dragonbone battle axe. Tei technically has both on them at all times during adventuring, alongside a shield, so which they used depends on the situation/which they grab fastest.

Combat Style: Two/One-handed tank. Main tactic is to rush in, cause as much damage/chaos as possible to shake up the opponent, & clean up what the ranged attackers of the party (usually Rumarin, Inigo and/or Lucien) weren't able to deal with.

Armor Type / Level In It: HEAVY ARMOR BABYYYYY (Level 100 + 35 extra points via enchantments)

# of Training Sessions: 99 in-game, lore wise its a lot of self-teaching/keeping their skills learned from Hammerfell sharp. Some of these are magic but lore-wise this doesn't happen cus Tei is not a magic user, save for shouts. I just did those in-game for exp OR so I can help Lucien raise his magic skills :'D

Who Taught Them?: In-game?? Fuuuck so many npcs. Lore-wise? They learned this from their schooling in Hammerfell, going off the canon-lore that it's p much expected for everyone to have a grasp on combat & weaponry! Though they did learn a few things from Kaidan & Anum-La.

Favorite Enemy Type: Dragons! Despite the fact Tei does not have the best magic resistance, it's one hell of a challenge they love to meet.

Least Favorite Enemy Type: Automatons, because of a bad experience with them as a child. Also Undead, because they were raised not to disturb them & it just feels so wrong having to fight them/go into tombs.

People Killed: 945

Animals Killed: 749 (Hunterborn makes hunting fun lol)

Undead Killed: 766

Automatons Killed: 105

Daedra Killed: 136

✧✧✧ Magic

Favorite School(s): None, actually. Destruction is okay though....they guess

Most Used Spell(s): Firebreath or Dragon Aspect. Tei doesn't consider shouts spells though. It's totally different guys shut up they ain't no smelly mage gods

Spells Learned: 9 in-game, mainly due to the spells you're kinda forced to learn for some quests/the ones you automatically know

Items Enchanted: 19 (Tei technically doesn't enchant, and wont next playthrough for sure I wont give in this time >:[ )

College of Winterhold Quests Completed: 8

Where Are They At In The Questline?: Main quest is done bcus i dont like seeing unfinished quests in my journal lmao. Tei's involvement is completely different from canon though in my take. Moreso was hired as a guard for the expedition & was, unwillingly, dragged into the rest of the mess. Is not offered the Archmage position, that went straight to Tolfdir.

Opinions on Magical Guilds (Arcane University, Winterhold, Psijics, Synod, Radiant Dark, etc.): As they get older, they tolerate the guild & magic users more n more, BUT, Tei grew up in an environment that frowns upon the practice of magic, & it shows. They mainly mistrust necromancers/illusionists & still hold onto that belief that reliance on magic, especially for combat, is a weakness.

Bold words for someone with shit magic resistance.

✧✧✧ Crime

Current Gold: 10,640

How Did They Acquire Their Gold?: Odd jobs, selling a lot of the items they made/harvested from smithing & hunting (jewelers are their go-to hirers bcus Tei is great at getting things like ivory), Dwemer ruin diving (they refuse to loot the tombs), also yknow....being part of the Dark Brotherhood helps

Largest Bounty On Their Head: 11,240

For...?: Unfortunately they did not stand down when they were being falsely accused of murder in Markarth. First time Tei called down dragons (Sahrotaar, specifically, Tei managed to get command of Miraak's dragons post-Dragonborn) to absolutely smite some fools.

Current Bounty: None! They're good at not getting caught/threatening and/or bribing guards. :)

Locks Picked: 15 i think?

Jail Time: 1, Cidhna Mine

Jail Escapes: 1, teamed up w the Forsworn lol

Murders: 28

Assaults: 307....In their defense people keep getting in their way during dragon attacks

Items Stolen: 37, most of them from the nobles of Windhelm

Thieves Guild Quests Completed: N/A (wont be doing this storyline unless i cant find a mod that'll let me get the shouts locked behind it)

Dark Brotherhood Quests Completed: 20

Where Are They At In Those Questlines?: DB is completed main arc wise!

✧✧✧ Relationships

Relationship Status: Married to two lovely fellas

Current Companions: atm? none

Housecarls: Lydia & Rayya

Friends (outside of party): Zora Fair-Child, Inigo, Lucien, Anum-La, Morndas, Aela the Huntress, Nazir, Babette, Scouts-Many-Marshes, Isobel, Madesi

Children: Khash, Chases-Starlight, Ram-Ku. (going of where Tei is now - Otero & Mei come around later on in Tei's story!)

Romantic Interest(s): Kaidan & Rumarin.

Sexual Orientation:

GAY

✧✧✧ Religion

Pantheon: Yokudan, with a hint of Hircine worship in there

Patron Deity(ies): From the Yokudan pantheon: Tei mainly views HoonDing as their main patron, but also prays to/pays respect to Satakal.

They are also Hircine's champion.

Daedric Quests Completed: 3 (Hircine, Vile, Dagon - the last Tei didn't really help, moreso pissed off)

Aedric Quests Completed: 1 if you count the whole Alduin thing I guess?

How Devout Are They?: Tei is rather devout, esp to their Yokudan patrons, praying or making offerings daily. They aren't the type to really push it in your face though, but have no issues answering questions one might have.

How Do They Feel About Talos Worship?: Deep down they acknowledge & admit trying to ban worship is terrible, but....Tei also lets their bias/experience with Windhelm, the Stormcloaks & especially Ulfric kinda cloud over this. If the Nords want their old ways so damn much, why fight for a divine from the Imperial Cult? Why not go back to the actual old ways? No, this isn't about worship, not to the men leading this so-called rebellion, they just needed something other than their racist bullshit to fool the common man into throwing their lives away for the nobles sitting comfortable in their thrones.

Also during their whole thing of getting into their role of dragonborn, they get a bonus 'fuck this dude actually' towards Talos, Ysmir, whatever the fuck he calls himself. (tldr; it sucks but good luck hearing Tei say that fully)

✧✧✧ Politics

Gray-Mane or Battle-Born?: Neither, ask them again they will punch you for the love of Ruptga they get asked that every time they enter Whiterun.

Stormcloaks or Imperials?: Also neither, Tei hates em both n think they can all choke. Unfortunately they were forced to join the latter due to, yknow, calling dragons & causing massive damage in Imperial territories during isolated fits of rage and the group being more aggressive in wanting something in return for "letting it slide"....oops

Opinion on the Thalmor?: Oh absolutely despises them, they loudly complained having to work with them during the CW & would go out their way to disrupt their plans/piss them off. Sneaking was an option they did not take during the Embassy quest, if it helps paint the picture.

Opinion Of Ulfric Stormcloak?: Tei doens't say they hate people often...but they sure as hell hate Ulfric. Again, their experience in Windhelm added to this heavily, how both the Dunmer & Argonians were treated like shit, with no help whatsoever from the Jarl or guards when the local Nords targeted them. It's still up in the air if I keep this for Tei's story, but I have it where they knew Chases-Starlight's parents, who were killed. When Tei went up & demanded justice/an investigation, only to be brushed off because it "wasn't a priority," it completely destroyed what little empathy or hope they had left for Windhelm as a whole.

Opinion of The Empire?: Cowards too weak to continue fighting back against the Thalmor, in their opinion, & holds these views they grew up with even when being strong-armed into aiding them. If anything they're at least attempting to use their influence to hint towards a rebellion against the Thalmor, but the Empire could also full-on dissolve & they could give less of a shit.

Civil War Quests Completed: 0

✧✧✧ Personal

How Are They Doing? Need Some Juice? A Nap? A Hug?: The whole event of Blood of Kings has fucked with their head, to say the least. It's the starting point of Tei's eventual spiral. So uh...yeah they're not sure how they're doing everything they knew about reality was kinda challenged & they don't rlly have anyone to talk to about it so its cool, its fine, its all good.

A nap is probably needed, not sure about a hug theough they're super flinchy rn

Days Past In Game: 196

Hours of Sleep: 846

Food Items Consumed: 1833

How Many Playthroughs Have You Done With This Character: Tei actually is an older character from the 360 days so uh...maybe 5 at most? This playthrough & their S:EC one coming up when the mod releases being the main ones focusing on their story

Overall How's Your Level Of Fun: Alright I would say! I just been stepping away from Skyrim more often lately to avoid burning out from it

Must Have Mods To Play This Character (for story or other reasons): Ordinator, Wintersun Faiths, Immersive Armors, Sarcastic Player Dialogue, 3DNPC, Inigo, Lucien Flavius, Kaidan 2, Khash the Argonian, Alternative Start, Leviathan Animations, Beast Race Body Paints, Beast HHBB, Apocalypse Magic, Deadly Dragons, Growl: Werewolf Overhaul, Pronouns, uhhh....idk what else without actually listing my current modlist lmao

----

And that's it for Tei! Anyone who wants to do this go on ahead!

[metalandmagi]

Summer 2020 Anime Worth Watching!

Apparently it’s time for the summer anime season, even though it feels like time is meaningless at this point. But somehow, there are still new shows coming out, so if you’re looking for something to watch when you’re stuck at home, here’s a list of the first impressions I got from this season. I don’t really know if it’s going to be worth it, considering how the spring season delayed so much, but here we are. 

As always, not all of these are available on Crunchyroll, but I’ll put a * next to the ones that are.

And if you’re looking for a bit more variety, I have lists for 2019 and the rest of this year’s seasons too...because remember when there was good anime being released instead of just everything being an ecchi or a second season?

2019 master list

My master list for every season of 2020 anime

New Shows!

*The God of High School: An over the top action anime consisting of one big tournament arc! It follows a group of teenagers competing in the epic “god of high school” martial arts tournament to determine the best fighter in the country. Following in the footsteps of Tower of God, this is the newest “crunchyroll original” that is being adapted from a South Korean webcomic. You can tell from the first episode that this will be a spectacle with crazy characters and lots of wild action and humor!

Great Pretender: When a Japanese con man pickpockets the wrong person, he ends up hopping on a plane to Los Angeles and getting wrapped up in a scheme with a sassy Frenchman named Laurent...who basically runs the mafia. There’s humor, there’s plot, there’s great characters, and it’s kinda gay. It’s an exciting original anime from studio Wit, so the animation is bursting with character, and both the music and the general vibe remind me a lot of Baccano or even Lupin III. And since it takes place in America with several foreign characters, there's hilarious English and accent shenanigans abound! The bad news is it’s still in Netflix jail, so if you want to watch it legally you’re kinda stuck for now. 

Japan Sinks 2020: A giant earthquake hits Japan, and a family must cope with the mayhem together. Because what the hell else could possibly go wrong this year? This is a new series (based on a novel) made by Masaaki Yuasa, the guy behind Ride Your Wave and Walk On Girl, if that tells you anything about the style of this anime. I’ve only watched the first two episodes so far, but I heard it goes from being a gripping realistic disaster series to a balls to the wall adventure. To be honest, disaster shows/movies freak me out, and this one is pretty devastating so far, which is a testament to how well it's made. But I appreciate that they include glimmers of hope when they’re needed. The best moments are the quiet ones that focus on the actual people and the narration that juxtaposes the time periods. There’s so much atmosphere, and the music really enhances the experience. And it’s all out on Netflix now, with a dub and a sub!

Deca-Dence: When humanity has been pushed to the edge of extinction by monsters called the Gadoll, the rest of civilization is forced to live in enormous mobile fortresses and send groups out to battle the unknown monsters. So basically like Mortal Engines but the fortresses can turn themselves into giant fists and punch the monsters. We follow a girl named Natsume who wants to be one of the soldiers who fight the Gadoll, but she is constantly rejected because of her prosthetic arm. So she ends up with five years of cleaning duty supervised by a stern but mysterious badass named Kaburagi. I honestly don’t care at all about the plot of the anime, because for me the characters are what drives everything, and these character dynamics are great. I’m not going to say it’s the most original story, but I think it’s fun so far. 

*Rent-a-Girlfriend: A typical harem/romance anime that follows the world’s most annoying protagonist named Kazuya. After Kazuya is dumped by his first girlfriend, he seeks out a rental girlfriend out of self pity….BECAUSE APPARENTLY THAT’S A REAL SERVICE THAT EXISTS IN JAPAN?! Like you can actually rent moms/dads/girlfriends/boyfriends and so on. Anyway, his fake girlfriend is the picture of anime waifu perfection...until Kazuya starts being his typical asshole self and she reveals her true nature of being an absolute sass master who don’t take no shit from no boring ass main character. Shenanigans happen and the two of them end up having to pretend they are in a real relationship. And I’m just calling it now...Kazuya’s grandma is the real best girl of the series. If you want a harem that’s actually funny and doesn’t mind roasting the protagonist, give this one a shot. Although I wish this were just a straight up romance instead of a harem because there is no way in hell that any girl, let alone more than one would want actually to date this guy. 

Next Seasons and Continuations!

*Fruits Basket 2019 (Season 2): Thank goodness Fruits Basket wasn’t delayed or cancelled last season because sometimes I feel like it was the only thing getting me through the spring. I’ve ranted about how good it is enough by now. If it can’t brighten your year, then nothing will. Just watch it if you haven’t already. 

*Re:ZERO-Starting Life in Another World (Season 2): Subaru is still trapped in another world, and he’s still as angsty as ever, but that’s not going to stop him from constantly putting himself through hell when he keeps dying horribly every time he needs to reset the timeline! There are mysterious new villains, nobody knows who Rem is (again) and I think there’s a plot somewhere under all the suffer porn. Seriously though, this show is pretty cool (even if I was two years late to the party). It’s one of the most interesting isekai anime I’ve ever seen, and it feels like it’s acting as a deconstruction of the genre, kinda like how Madoka Magica is for magical girl anime...both shows certainly have enough crying. The story is weird but interesting, the world building is cool, the villains (and sometimes the heroes) are batshit crazy to watch, and I like its moments of humor. 

No Guns Life (season 2): The story of Juzo, the hard boiled detective who plays by his own rules continues in the second season of No Guns Life. In case you missed the first season, this is a mystery/action anime that feels like an old noir film had a cyberpunk baby. There’s underground conspiracies, there’s interesting side characters, and...oh yeah the main character has a gun for a head. That’s right. we came to see a bara detective with a literal gun for a face, but we stayed for the world building and mysterious plots!

*Fire Force (Season 2): I’m going to be honest here, I really didn’t know if I should include this one or not. I have a major love hate relationship with Fire Force, but I figured there may be other people out there who would like it more than I do. So in case you missed the first season, this show follows a group of firefighters who puts out fires caused by spontaneous combustion using a mixture of guns and super powers. It was created by Atsushi Ōkubo, aka the guy who made Soul Eater. So it’s bound to be amazing right?

Not necessarily. Strap in for this one lads. 

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed with this show overall. Its main characters just aren’t that interesting most of the time, it can’t decide on what kind of show it wants to be, and so much of it just dragged for a good part of the series. I don’t know if it was a problem of pacing or if the plot was just that uninteresting for a while. The first couple episodes set up a very unique plot, filled with intriguing moral dilemmas. And then it proceeded to abandon everything interesting in favor of badly timed fan-service. It just couldn’t strike the balance that Soul Eater had between its humor and its sincerity. If they wanted to make an ecchi show, they should have just made one instead of inserting the same overplayed scenarios into every episode. I don’t care if a show has fan-service as long as it fits the tone, or if it only has certain episodes dedicated to playing up the humor. But Fire Force has a habit of just inserting it wherever it wants regardless of what’s actually happening in the episode. Also, some of the humor revolves around one of the main female characters who has a really messed up self image because she’s slightly more muscular, and not a tiny delicate flower like some of the other girls. Not going to pretend that doesn’t bug me. 

But that doesn’t mean there is nothing good about it! If there wasn’t, I wouldn’t have finished the first season, and I wouldn’t be including this one. So far, the second season has actually been funny because it made the first episode more like filler, instead of cramming in too much plot all at once. And to the surprise of no one, the animation is absolutely god tier. I wish it was being used for something other than clumsy fan-service, but it’s still really something to see. The world building is super creative and 100% my aesthetic, and there were a couple side characters I really loved later in the series (Benimaru). And I did like the twists and turns the series took later in the season when it actually focused on the conspiracy behind the fire force and the cult. When it follows the mysteries it sets up, it’s more fun to watch. Who would have thought? 

TLDR: There’s good stuff and there’s bad stuff. This show is really something you have to watch for yourself to decide if it’s going to be worth it. I’m going to at least try the second season, because I want to see where this goes, but it’s on thin ice. 

Honorable Mentions

Isekai edition! Both of these came out last season, but I hadn’t mentioned them when I made my spring list. But they’re both getting dubs now so I’m still counting them.

*My Next Life as a Villainess- All Routes Lead to Doom!: A twist on the isekai genre where our main protagonist wakes up as a character in her favorite otome game...only to find that she’s actually the bitchy rival side character who ends up either dead or exiled in every route of the game. So naturally she does everything she can to prevent this by becoming a sweet and caring supporting character...who inadvertently makes every single other character in the game fall in love with her. I ignored this show for the first few episodes because I need another isekai in the world like I need a hole in the head, but after hearing everyone rave about it, I caught up with it in no time. It’s a fun take on the otome game tropes, and it manages to be funny and sweet while not committing to any particular pairing.

*Ascendance of a Bookworm (Season 2): That’s right, it’s another isekai where an adult is reincarnated into the body of a child in a fantasy world. But this time, it’s a nerdy girl whose entire purpose in life revolves around reading books (can relate). However, when our main character Mine is thrust into this fantasy world, she quickly realizes that this particular fantasy setting is a little too...medieval  for her tastes...meaning a family of commoners like hers would have no clue how to read and books are only meant for rich people or the church. So of course Mine has to figure out how to either get her hands on some books or make them herself. This is a super cute show that I waited a long time to finally watch, and since the second season is finally being dubbed I wanted to shout it out. It’s just a wholesome isekai version of Dr. Stone. There’s no real action, but it’s a relaxing watch if nothing else. 

Well, there you have it. Hopefully nothing else gets delayed or cancelled because it’s pretty slim pickings as it is. And before anyone asks, I didn’t include GIBIATE because I thought it was a massive disappointment that somehow made a time travel horror anime plot boring. There’s also My Teen Romantic Comedy Snafu, but it’s been 5 years since I watched the other seasons and don’t remember anything about it. But there’s that too in case anyone is a fan of the series and didn’t know it got another season. 

See you next season…if the world is still here by then?

[koganeirou]

me before playing blue lions: haha I’m not like ~other girls~ I don’t like Dimitri and I think he’s boring and basic.

me after playing blue lions: I will die for Dimitri.

I finally finished Azure Moon!! Can’t believe it took me 4 damn months to finish this route. Just like with Crimson Flower, I decided to do a very long write up of my thoughts of this route after letting my thoughts marinate for a bit. There will be spoilers for both Azure Moon and Crimson Flower. Also disclaimer: these are just my personal opinions.

Tldr: this route was so fucking good!!!! I jumped ship from being team Edie/BE to team Dimitri/BL faster than Sylvain jumps girlfriends because I enjoyed this route more than Crimson Flower in almost every way possible. The Blue Lions are my KIDS and I will die for each and every one of them. Blue Lions may not be my first route/house, but this is where my heart rightfully lies. 

I guess the first thing I should get out of the way are the negatives. While this isn’t really a complaint about AM specifically and more so the narrative over the entire game... the conflict between Edelgard and Dimitri seems really stupid and contrived. In other games, war happens because the villain is evil. In this game, war happens because the villain is fucking stupid. Basically, I still ain’t convinced that Edelgard’s war was ever necessary LMAO. She straight up nuked the church’s authority and relevancy out of orbit the chapter before the time skip, so she technically already accomplished her goal; why she still feels the need to go on a savage conquest alludes me. 

Speaking of nuking the church’s relevancy out of orbit, that’s exactly what happened to Rhea LOL. Despite all the church goons clamoring every .5 seconds about how they gotta save Rhea, we literally never see her again at all after the time skip, even at the end of the game. It makes no sense why Edelgard would keep Rhea imprisoned and not kill her, especially when Rhea seemingly served no greater purpose to Edelgard and became completely irrelevant in the war phase.

Edie says some mumbo jumbo of “I weighed the victims of this war against the victims of the world and I deem that there will be less victims of war” like bitch, how??? How do you tangibly quantify “victims of this world”. If she means “people who had a shitty life because of shitty society”, then those people are always going to exist because every society has its flaws. Even if you change society, you aren’t decreasing that number because you’re only solving problems by creating new ones (Edelgard’s specialty). Also the mental gymnastics you have to do to be tortured by an evil organization only to team up with said evil organization to take down another organization that, unless I missed something, isn’t even directly responsible for the death of all your siblings??? In both CF and AM, Edelgard comes off as incredibly thoughtless and illogical in her actions and I can’t help but feel that if she had been just a little bit more diplomatic, then maybe, just maybe, she could have found a better solution without starting a bloody war.

This brings me to the god forsaken chat between Edelgard and Dimitri. Dimitri demanding to know why Edelgard started the war only for her to go “it was the only way” has about the same narrative weight as “Riku why did you become one with the darkness?!” “Because I’m the worst”. Instead of bitching about whose ~ideals~ are better, how about y’all sit down and actually discuss what each person wants to accomplish and maybe figure out a way to accomplish these goals without murdering each other over it? Not that I think Edelgard would accept anything BUT murder, but jesus, this is why you don’t leave diplomatic matters to actual children.

Speaking of why you don’t leave diplomatic matters to children, god that Gronder battle. I get that it’s supposed to be an epic showdown between the three houses that mirrored the mock battle pre time skip but... the Kingdom had literally NO reason to fight the Alliance!!! The reasons they provided to justify why the Kingdom and Alliance couldn’t team up at Gronder was so fucking dumb, especially when two chapters down the line, Claude is knocking at our door begging for help. I will say tho, I never knew how much I appreciated himbo in distress Claude until now lmao.

Rodrigue's death was also really poorly done imo. As much as I liked having Dimitri’s father figure be the one to snap him out of his insanity, (I love found father/son relationships...) how on earth are you guys so fucking incompetent that you let this tiny little girl kill Rodrigue??? It doesn’t help that the exact same thing happened with Jeralt and Monica. This... just ain’t it, chief. 

I think the biggest bone I have to pick at AM specifically is... so what the fuck is the truth behind the Tragedy of Duscur LMAO??? They literally blue balled me by dropping the bomb of “Dimitri’s step mom may have conspired in it�� ONLY TO NOT DO ANYTHING WITH IT. I assume that the full truth behind the Duscur tragedy will probably be revealed in VW (I hope) because it involves the slithers but it’s highkey ridiculous that the BL goons... never actually find out what really happened, and why. And I get that the story is about them moving on from their trauma and the past, but they should have at least figured out the actual truth behind it so they can get the closure they deserve???

Despite the gripes I have with some of the writing, unless VW or SS is mind blowingly amazing, this route will easily stand as the best route for me, because.... it is kind of is mind blowingly amazing. I wholeheartedly love character driven stories, and this route absolutely delivers in that respect-- the character writing is amazing and is essentially the heart of this story. To think Dimitri and the Blue Lions were the lord/house I was least interested in at first. Even after hearing people talk about what the BL goons and Dimitri’s character arc was roughly about, I was still blown away by just how damn fucking good it was, and this route exceeded my expectations in every way possible. 

When playing CF, I struggled to connect with a lot of the beagles; I didn’t have that problem at all with the BL goons and the route does a phenomenal job at making me actually give a shit about these characters and their problems. Childhood friend squad (+Marianne and Ashe) are easily my favourite characters in this game by a landslide, and the dynamic between not only the childhood friend squad, but all the BL goons, was just so, so amazing. Watching these characters that are seemingly joined by a single tragedy, rise above all their suffering as they grow, heal, and overcome hardship together is just so... MY KIDS... MY HEART..... I really got the sense of not only their shared pain, but also shared intimacy, care, and friendship. Their support conversations with each other had everything; from goofy and fun, to soothing and nurturing, to painful and harrowing. 

The connections that the BL goons have to the pre time skip missions gave part 1 story so much more meaning, and it only gets better after the time skip. I really appreciate that the BL bean boys actually feel relevant to the main story, and that their input and opinions actually mattered. The cast’s struggle to come to a consensus on the best course of action during the war phase made them feel like actual people with opinions, unlike in CF, where everyone was just a mindless passenger to Edie’s not so merry joyride. This also made Dimitri’s arc way more impactful because the narrative actually holds him accountable for the consequences that his behavior/poor decisions had on others. What I also really liked about the war phase is that you could just feel how war torn the kingdom was and how much everything went to shit after the time skip. I felt really strongly to the characters’ sense of hopelessness at fighting a losing battle as they struggled to keep their home land in tact while everything just kept spiraling out of control and deteriorating further. 

So to see the BL goon beans slowly, one battle at a time, turn the tide of the war and push back against the corner they were backed in, was SO fulfilling and rewarding. The battle of Fhirdiad is probably my favourite battle in the entire game because it felt like all the suffering and toiling that the BL goons went through was finally worth it, and just watching the kingdom slowly heal after being liberated was just such a good feeling. This kind of payoff is something I think CF sorely lacked, since tbh, I struggled to celebrate Edie’s victories with her. Though I do appreciate how Edie’s a much more threatening antagonistic force than either Dimitri or Rhea were in CF too bad Edelgard’s boss battle was pathetically easy and Dimitri shredded through her armor like swiss cheese... at least Rhea put up a slightly challenging fight.

I could gush about the characters all day, but Dimitri? He makes this game, 100%. This truly felt like his story and he was the star of this route. On a superficial level, I’m a basic bitch as well as a slut for angsty boys who have trouble talking about their trauma because I want them to rail me. I fucking loved his feral personality it was just so fun to watch and interact with LMAO 10/10 would let him use me until the flesh falls from my bones. His dialogue in this state is just so demeaning, belittling and raw that it somehow comes a full circle and becomes charming I promise I’m not a sick masochist.

I’m also a degenerate and dimileth is my otp. The way the relationship between Dimitri and Byleth develops over the game truly felt like a bond forged over time. The way Dimitri admits that he couldn’t trust Byleth at first because he was put off by the way they could “kill without batting an eye”, to being so elated when he sees them smile for the first time that he’s completely mesmerized when they starts expressing emotion... oof, talk about otp material. I think what really sold me is the way he’s their anchor after Jeralt’s death; their emotional support both in a traditional sense, but also in a darker sense when he declares he will kill anyone so they desire it because their enemies are his enemies. Character A declaring they’d die for character B? Soft shit. Character A declaring they’d kill for character B? A+ romance right there, boys. 

On a non superficial level, Dimitri’s character arc of his fall from grace and subsequent redemption was absolutely phenomenal. Just seeing how far he sinks, how far he goes, only to see how far he climbs his way back up after hitting rock bottom, was such a roller coaster and I loved every minute of it. I also probably like revenge stories more than I care to admit. Dimitri has everything; blood lust, cruelty, obsession, but also empathy and compassion so extreme that it’s his very own innate kindness that drives him into insanity, which is what makes him such a compelling character in my eyes. The extremity of his psychosis was absolutely heart breaking, but despite everything, him making the conscious decision to change for the better and rise up to fulfill his role as king was just astounding to watch. 

I will say though... maybe I have a screwed up moral compass but tbh Dimitri brutally killing imperial soldires didn’t really upset me because... this is war??? That he didn’t even start?? Everyone is killing everyone??? Even if he never went feral, he’d still be killing because his bloody kingdom is being invaded?????? But I digress.

While I think just how damn avoidable everything was kind of detracts from the tragedy of his relationship with Edelgard, I still really loved how steadfast and unconditional his love for her was (after he stops going feral), and you can tell just how much she meant to him every time he spoke of her. I also love how the dagger kind of becomes a symbolic motif throughout the story, and Edie throwing the dagger at him in the final cutscene as a sign of her wholehearted rejection of him was just fucking depressing, but also very fitting of her character. 

I adore the whole overarching narrative and themes surrounding grief and death, befitting of a war game. How, as tempting as it is to constantly keep the memory of the dead alive, there comes a point where you have to move on and not let your life be ruled by those no longer around. The way that the characters react to the death of loved ones and grieve so differently was a huge highlight of the BL squad’s characterizations, which just makes them feel more alive and human. Honestly, no words can really describe just how incredible of an experience Azure Moon was.

Anyway my order from favourite to least favourite BL goon bean boys are: Dimitri > Ashe >/= Sylvain >/= Felix > Ingrid > Mercedes > Annette > Dedue. (I love Ashe/Sylvain/Felix almost equally LOL)

tldr my experience with Azure Moon:

tfw my second best girl is childhood friends with all the best boys in the entIRE GAME and she settles for a guy with a dead wife, daughter, and most likely triple her age :|.

I’ll be finally playing Golden Deer next, which I’m gonna do on NG+ Maddening so.... hope that goes well!!

[spinblue]

Hello~ Can I ask if you have any ships you like with Sonic?

//Hello! Thank you for asking. This ask actually made me realize that I’m missing two sections on my rules page???? I’m a mess wow. I’ll add them under read more here.

But to directly answer to your question — and I hope it’s not presumptuous of me to just assume you mean ship as in romantic ships — tbh I guess I do have some favourites, but I’m not going to specifically list them here, because I don’t want to like — I dunno, make it seem like I’m expecting anything should I rp with those muses? Besides, from my experience, you could have the OTP of all OTP and love a ship to death, but end up actually shipping with a completely different muse just because of one gooD thread. ( and honestly, that’s the most exciting thing for me. Getting so invested in thread(s) and wanting to develop the relationship between two muses and everything just getting away from you until you end up with something you didn’t expect but are 100% okay with? That’s the GOOD stuff ) 

I guess if I had to narrow anything down, I’m not the biggest fan of hate shipping? I’m 100% okay with muses hating each other and then coming to like each other, but straight up hate ship isn’t my thing. ( I like my muses to be so f t to the ones they like okay i’m a sap ) That all said and done, Tails is a definite no. Absolutely never. Same with any like, actual children children. I suppose it’s also good to note that I default aged up my Sonic in particular to around 19 or 20 years old.

TLDR;; I’m open to any romantic ship developing really. Key word is developing. I’m also 100% okay with none happening ever. Like, platonic ships are absolutely great??? And so underrated. Sonic lov e s his friends and I love Sonic loving his friends. 

Add ons to my rules page!! 

+ Mun intro+Shipping rules

Hello! You can call me Free!! It’s an alias that I received from one of my other blogs, and I have grown fond of it. 

I use all pronouns, though please default to they/them if you don’t personally know me! 

I have an uncontrollable habit of rambling whenever I talk/type (and it seeps into my rping) so fair warning! Honestly, don’t ask me any questions ever unless you want multiple paragraphs of me kind of answering the question but also just adding unnecessary details you probably didn’t even want. (case in point, above)

I am currently 22 and a complete MESS. I also use too many exclamation points when I talk and I cringe every time. That’s it for me!

-

SHIPPING:

This blog is multi-ship with each ship taking place in their own universe (unless discussed otherwise). Prior interaction and development must occur beforehand!

Please feel free to talk to me if you do end up shipping our muses. I’ll most likely at least be open to the possibility of it, even if I don’t ship it at that moment. And if I don’t, well, then I’ll politely decline and we can go on as usual. It never hurts to ask!

I also am super insistent on the developing part, but I don’t exactly expect us to have an encyclopedia of threads between our muses before shipping. I know that sometimes plot ideas and the like run on faster than you can reply in a thread. ( esp with me being so sl o w ) So as long as our muses have some sort of dynamic I’m open to talking about something more happening. 

That all said and done, I’m not here just to rp romance. Sonic is very much a people person, and he thrives off his friends. Having different people with different dynamics surrounding him is what makes things fun!

It’s also good to note that Sonic is a tactile person (hedgehog?). He likes head pats, fist bumps, hugs, slinging arms around shoulder — all that stuff. ( even if he stumbles during it sometimes oop ) It doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s into your muse, so don’t make assumptions based off that! I’m not going to just try and casually slip romance into our threads. If it kind of just happens due to the development of our muses that’s another story, but I’ll be sure to let you know if that is the case. Sonic is just a friendly guy. I’ll speak to you if I intend for any of Sonic’s actions to hint as more than friends feelings.

[borghildrs]

So there is something I have always bounced in my head for a while, which I now have a solid answer to thanks to finally getting around to reading the first Dispatch comic.

A long while back Funamusea made a comment to the effect of “If neither participant wants it, a child will not be born.” in regards to how conception works. This was always a little oddly worded for me because it says that there is definitely no chance that a child is born if neither wants one but that doesn’t necessarily confirm how it works if only one wants one or even both.

If both want one, does that mean the possibility of conception is just there, but doesn’t automatically equate to it happening? Or will a child be born 100%? If only one wants one but the other doesn’t, does that mean it won’t happen? Or is it a matter of who has the stronger desire?

I think about this a lot because it’s sorta an interesting idea, but also because it’ll largely effect Lobco & Zero.

Putting the rest under cut since it talks about trauma/consent issues and whatnot.

The Dispatch comic....well. It revealed what I feel is the intent behind that, and that is, yes. Both parties must want a child for a child to be born....but given the circumstances it really does bring into question issues of consent (as is almost always the case in Funamusea work). Ivlis was essentially broken into wanting a child since he was so caught up in the trauma of what Satanick was doing to him, and him reaching rock bottom in his feelings over what Siralos had done to him.

Soo...yea.....I personally wouldn’t really count that as actually wanting a child, but it happened.

All that said this means there is at least one good thing in Lobco’s life and that is that she won’t have to fear being forced to have Roc’s kids. As I say in my tags, I speak this in terms of the RP scene. With what Funamusea has said it seems she’ll be treading the exact same grounds as Sataivlis with these two but I don’t have to roleplay Lobco as having that hanging over her head all the time. I’m hardly the person who demands an absolutely perfect, shiny happy ending for all my muses but it’s nice to be able to throw her one bone.

Truth be told I don’t think she’ll ever have kids with anyone because of everything with Roc which means the fankids I’ve had with folks over the years can’t really exist anymore, but most folks have moved onto other fandoms and with relationships reset here it is probably for the best.

On the other hand it makes things a little complicated with Zero. When I first picked him up I went with a fun idea that I knew WASN’T correct but I decided to go along with it anyway since I didn’t imagine we’d get any sort of context for him (we really haven’t). That idea being that he was the child of Taffy and Roc from the time that Roc assaulted him. We know Roc wants kids, so perhaps a subconscious part of him was fine with getting it from anywhere.

Again I knew this wasn’t going to be canon but I thought it’d allow for Zero to occupy a very interesting space in Fumus’ heaven and could explain his hatred for Roc (having cause Taffy that trauma, inheriting his appearance which must be triggering for so many people, and of course him just being a horrible person).

Obviously I can’t keep with that anymore, especially with a couple new details anymore but it’s put me in a position where I need to put Zero on the backburner for a bit while I figure out what exactly I want to do with him. I definitely won’t be dropping him, but so far the ideas I’ve come up with haven’t really been fun ones.

Oh well, we’ll see.

TLDR there is one good thing for Lobco, lmao.

[giasonesdream]

Track Your Fic’s Success on AO3

Fanfic Writing on AO3 (for ARMYS)

I'm not sure why I felt the need to make this, but I have heard writers talk about this topic before, of not getting much traction on their fics. There's a part of it that really does fall on the readers, but this is a post to maybe help get you on the right path or maybe change your perspective on the stats given to you (aka kudos, hits, comments, etc).

The 10% Idea

Basically, this is just something to keep in mind if you see that there aren't many kudos on your story.

I used to have a friend that said pretty much this: If the amount of kudos is 10% of the amount of hits you have, then it's deemed a good fic. That is to say, even if your story only gets 50 kudos out of 500 people that read it, you're in the clear.

I'll be using screenshots of my own works as example because I have a range of decently well-received stories to not well received at all.

So this one has almost exactly 10% the amount of kudos.

This, which has only a whopping 5 kudos is in the 10% (it’s actually not it’s 2am and my brain is shitting itself but I’m gonna make a point with this one regardless so leave my math error alone}

Meanwhile, this fic only has 55 kudos even though, presumably, over 2k people read it.

There are a few things that should be taken into consideration here:

THE SHIP: it's no shock to anyone -especially writers- that there are favoured ships in our fandom. Taekook and Jikook take the first place spot followed by Yoonmin (this one actually was named the top ship on all of ao3 a couple years ago!) along with yoonseok/sope maybe Namjin? This is all to say, if you write about a ship that isn't necessarily popular, not many people will read your work. That isn't to say that you should only write for certain ships. Please write what you want and what you feel! I cannot stress enough that all of this should be for fun or maybe even practice if writing is your passion.

But let’s look back at the three fics I pointed out. The first one with 400 kudos is taekook, so it had a better chance of getting seen by more people. In fact, 4k people clicked on it and potentially read that story...but the next fic with only 5 kudos is yoonmin. Aren’t they a popular ship? Why did only 100 people read it? And vhope isn’t necessarily a popular ship now (it had its time earlier on back when Rookie King came out, and the veterans for that ship are still fighting, me included!) but 2k people clicked on that and only 55 of those 2k liked it enough to leave a kudos. So, if it’s not the ship, what else could it be?

THE TAGS: tagging a story is very detrimental when posting on a site like this or any other, really. Many people like to narrow their searches down based on the criteria. Being able to filter what fics a person sees can make or break a work’s traction. My yoonmin story is a horror fic, and I’m sure there aren’t very many readers looking to get scared. As an avid reader myself, there is no denying that I -as well as many other readers- are interested in reading smut. Whether it be a one shot that’s quick and easy, or maybe it’s a slow-burn that tallies up to just being a written rom-com series, if you specify in the tags that smut is in this story, people are more willing to give it a try. For the vhope fic, I didn’t mention smut, but I did put in the tags some subgenres of smut. You can’t have “over stimulation” without sex, right? 

But, again, I feel the need to stress this: do not write smut if you are not comfortable with it! Despite the fact that a lot of us are thirsty, shameless fiends, there about just as many people that are only here for the cutesy, lovey-dovey shit. That taekook fic doesn’t have any sex in it, nor did I ever mention that there was a possibility of sex. It doesn’t go past being flirty in the span of 2k words. So, then, if a fic with a popular ship can do well without having sex in it, what else is making people click on it?

THE SUMMARY: I...am such a huge advocate for summaries. There’s a nice fine line between going into too much detail or not enough. This is why I normally go the route of putting in an excerpt from the story and then add a TLDR (Too Long Don’t Read) in the form of an “OR” followed by an incredibly oversimplified idea of what the story is about. As you can see, I didn’t do that for the yoonmin fic. I only put in an excerpt that -quite frankly- is boring narrative. The reason as to why I chose that in the first place is because the horror aspect of the fic is where any dialogue comes in- which brings me to the next point!

This could just be me, but I do tend to click on stories that have dialogue in the summary. This is going to depend on if the reader cares more about dialogue or narration, but think of the story as if it were a new movie coming out or preview to a new episode of a show. Do these videos only broadcast the actors simply moving around? No, they like to add in clips from scenes, use dialogue where you can sort of understand what the context of the scene might be, but not enough context so you’ll want to watch and see what the fuck they’re talking about.

So, if you’ve gotten to this part, you have probably realized that all I did was just tell you how you can market your writing so that more people will click on it and possibly read it all the way through. And really, these aren’t necessarily sure, guaranteed ways of becoming the next “The Fic” in our fandom, but I can assure that just taking more time to consider these aspects can allow you to contemplate what works for you as well as the audience. 

That’s that on that. The next thing I want to talk about some stuff I didn’t cover that are just as important:

Comments (and Bookmarks)

This is probably the biggest thing I ever hear/read/see artists of any sort complain about. And with good reason! As a writer, it truly does wonders to get feedback of almost any sort, even if it’s just a critique on how something was worded. Comments mean that we’re not just throwing our art out into a vast void. Effort was put into the art we created, so if you enjoyed it, effort put into commenting is much appreciated. But this isn’t another rant begging the audience to please just let us know how you felt. No, I’m here to mention that we should not let the number of kudos overshadow the interactions.

More examples. And keep in mind that taekook fic. Feel free to scroll back up and look at the amount of comments on that work. Now take a look at these:

So, 8.1k read this fic...and only 250 people liked it...but boy did this story cause some sort of reaction because people W E N T O F F! And rest assured, none of the comments were necessarily negative. The majority of them are just people being like “wha- how could they >.<”

Everything seems to be pretty even across the board. 2.6k readers, 220 kudos, about 20 or so comments (that’s excluding my replies). 

As I mentioned before, comments are so important. The taekook fic I wrote that seemed to garner enough traction where 4k people read it and 400 people liked it enough to leave a kudos, only a handful of those readers left a comment. It kinda makes me think of instagram. How strange does it look if a picture gets 10k likes but only has maybe 10 or 20 comments. Something seems a bit off, doesn’t it? I can see how this sounds entitled, but my sole purpose in bringing this up is because those numbers can be discouraging. And I want to stress how important it is to look at your works, cherish the comments you get even if the number of hearts seems low in comparison. Some of my most heartfelt comments are on that Taegi fic just above. And it makes them all the more special because this has been my favourite story to write. So even though not many have read it (whether it be because the ship isn’t popular or I didn’t do a good job of summarizing the fic where it seemed interesting) the people that clicked on an liked it felt the need to comment some absolutely amazing words. And those are the comments that should keep you going and growing.

I’ll also just add this little tidbit because it wasn’t something I noticed until recently, you should also check the bookmarks. People are able to leave comments and tags in their bookmarks, and I believe those to be extensions of comments. Not only did people feel like saving this work you wrote, but they might just let out some of their feelings in the tags, like the tags section of a tumblr post or the comment on a retweet.

There is no rule or formula that I particularly know of for getting more comments -aside from using the note section to say “let me know what you think” or “comments are always appreciated!”. I think this aspect somewhat depends on the story itself. That taekook fic I wrote is probably one of the more “cookie-cutter” things I have written. Tropes are great, they normally have a plot and formula that people can follow and know what’s going to happen. And they’re tropes for a reason: they’re common and entertaining. I know I don’t always like to go the route of writing tropes. I have accepted that the style in which I write is not always catered towards the general audience, but that is completely okay!

As I said before, this is for fun. You write because you have a story you want to tell, and you feel so passionately about it that you take the time and effort to write it. If my numbers have proven anything, it’s that your fics will find their niche. It’s always going to fit someone. And it’s important to really appreciate those that seem to like what you’re writing, even if the greater audience doesn’t vibe with it.

And that’s that on that.

So, since we’ve gone over all this, I just wanted to say that I am open to helping writers. I know this post probably isn’t the best representation, but I’m pretty damn good at spelling and grammar. I’m not a novelist, don’t have any published works floating anywhere on the New York Times Best Seller list, but I have been writing since I was seven years old. With fifteen years of experience and having worked with authors in the past on potential books, I am always more than happy to pass on any knowledge I have gained over the years. If it’s wording something to make it flow better, trying to fill any plot holes or answer questions of character motivations, of if you should be using “there”, “they’re”, or “their”, I would love to help. All ya gotta do is message me :)

*mic drop*

[malcacom]

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If you’re like me, you’ve had at least one nightmare where your motorcycle gets stolen. The closest encounter I’ve had was when my neighbour got his CBR stolen, while mine was parked less than 10 meters (30 feet) away. MFW I heard what happened the next morning:

The same evening I came back home at around 12am, and sat next to my motorcycle until it was daytime. I was that worked up. Anywho, I spent the next few days researching security measures, and common practices of thieves. I’m sharing the results with you in hopes of saving a few wheels out there.

At this point in my life I didn’t have a garage, so I had to park in front of my building

1. Say NO to gated-parking garages in apartment complexes.

That’s the first place where thieves go “shopping”. This is especially relevant in the US. The following high-risk places are:

apartment complex parking spots

parking garages

detached garages at apartment complexes

College ��bike parking”

Shopping mall parking spots

So where do I park? If you absolutely cannot park inside the house/garage, rent a self-storage unit near your home. Make sure you invest in heavy duty locks — normal garage doors are easy to break into, as easy as stealing door codes are.

If you live in the US, parking at home/home garage has additional benefits: in addition to theft, you can be charged with breaking and entering. The charges get worse if the residents are at home, even worse if a child is present in the home, and worst if any of the tools they carry can be classified as weapons. TLDR, park in your garage and make some babies. If none are an option, see #7.

Sen. Bernie Sanders revealed a secret Wednesday night.

2. NEVER leave your spare keys or documents in the trunk.

This one should be no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how many people do this out of convenience.

3. Be wary of second-hand dealers and bike-mover companies.

When getting a bike from a second hand dealer, try to leave as little information as possible — no address, full name etc. More than often they are involved in the game. Same goes for motorcycle movers. Try to arrange your own transport whenever you can.

4. Is your bike a high-risk target?

If you own any of the following, brace yourself:

Super Sport

Harley

0–3 year old model

These are highest on the “shopping list” for thieves. Anything that is 7+ years old is unlikely to get stolen. Still, that doesn’t mean you can leave it unchained in the street, got it?

5. If someone already tried stealing your bike and failed, they WILL be back for it.

Get that bike someplace safe. NOW.

an hero

6. If you just got a replacement for your stolen bike, they WILL be back for it.

While you are reaping that sweet sweet karma from your insurance, and enjoying your new pair of wheels, they are already putting you on the “to-do” list. See #5 for instructions.

an hero

7. There is no single-best security solution.

You first need to understand how the minds of thieves work. They will be looking for the fastest/most quiet way of stealing that bike. Therefore, a combination of security systems that look tedious to break will be the best solution. What does this mean? A best solutions is having ALL 3 of the following:

1) A disk lock on the REAR wheel

Do not buy anything that costs under $90–100. I’m serious. Best bet options would be something like this XENA Disk Lock or ABUS Disk Lock, both equipped with alarms. Cutting these locks will most probably not be an option, while removing a rear wheel is a lot harder/longer than the front one.

2) A chain lock going trough HARD PARTS of the bike

ex. frame, braced swingarm etc. If this is not an option, opt for sliding it through the rear wheel and placing the disk lock on the front one. Just make sure that you don’t chain it to a picket fence.

Pro-tip: try to have the chain as high as possible. When the chain is not near or touching the ground it’s a LOT harder to cut.

Same as the disk lock, don’t buy anything below $100. Some safe options are this KRYPTONITE Chain, this ABUS Chain or anything in the same category. Every thief has a pair of nice bolt-cutters that can cut trough any cheap chain. High-end chains will take a LOT more time to cut, as well as make a lot of noise. Time and noise are the thief’s worst enemy.

3) Lock the damn steering

Yes, I know some are very easy to break, but add it to the two above, and it’s just another item on the “time schedule”.

Note 1

In case you have LoJack or anything similar installed, make sure you keep the wiring and boxes out of the obvious places. They will definitely be looking for any non-OEM wires/hardware under the seat and tank. LoJack stickers are even worse; only maybe when you don’t actually have a gps unit, in which case — good job making them look. If you want to go really crazy, make/buy something like this and stick it in the headlights or something.

Note 2

In case you cover your bike with a tarp, get another cheaper lock with an alarm and use that to tie up the tarp around the bike. That’s an additional hassle for thieves; it makes noise, and they have no idea what’s waiting for them underneath in terms of security.

Photos by North Vietnamese photographers show the war like it’s never been seen.

8. Chain bikes one to another when travelling.

This one should be a no-brainer as well.

9. How to spot a “scout”?

Your bike will be scouted numerous time, and you better be sure that by now the thieves know your daily routine.

A common occurrence would be a person walking with a dog or a kid. What they are doing is checking for any devices that have alarms. If someone spots them while scouting, they can say the dog or kid tipped the alarm off.

10. So how is it done?

The average time thieves would spend on stealing a bike is 30 sec. The most they would dare spend is a couple of minutes. This is where the 3 points from #7 come to play — time.

The order of events being carried out during a job are the following:

The ignition is set up to be ready for start

Safety equipment removed (disk lock, chain)

Steering lock is snapped

Ignition is plugged, bike is started

The bike is taken out of sight and checked for GPS devices

Sometimes, the bike might be left someplace else in the neighbourhood; covered and locked up. In case your bike goes missing, make sure you scout the area for any covered bikes.

Final Note

A lot of this info came from posts and comments on /r/motorcycles, so I want to pay my respects where they are due.

Original Article : Medium

Rick Santorum dropping out of 2016 race after lackluster showing in Iowa If you’re like me, you’ve had at least one nightmare where your motorcycle gets stolen. The closest encounter I’ve had was when my neighbour got his CBR stolen, while mine was parked less than 10 meters (30 feet) away.

[malcacom]

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If you’re like me, you’ve had at least one nightmare where your motorcycle gets stolen. The closest encounter I’ve had was when my neighbour got his CBR stolen, while mine was parked less than 10 meters (30 feet) away. MFW I heard what happened the next morning:

The same evening I came back home at around 12am, and sat next to my motorcycle until it was daytime. I was that worked up. Anywho, I spent the next few days researching security measures, and common practices of thieves. I’m sharing the results with you in hopes of saving a few wheels out there.

At this point in my life I didn’t have a garage, so I had to park in front of my building

1. Say NO to gated-parking garages in apartment complexes.

That’s the first place where thieves go “shopping”. This is especially relevant in the US. The following high-risk places are:

apartment complex parking spots

parking garages

detached garages at apartment complexes

College “bike parking”

Shopping mall parking spots

So where do I park? If you absolutely cannot park inside the house/garage, rent a self-storage unit near your home. Make sure you invest in heavy duty locks — normal garage doors are easy to break into, as easy as stealing door codes are.

If you live in the US, parking at home/home garage has additional benefits: in addition to theft, you can be charged with breaking and entering. The charges get worse if the residents are at home, even worse if a child is present in the home, and worst if any of the tools they carry can be classified as weapons. TLDR, park in your garage and make some babies. If none are an option, see #7.

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2. NEVER leave your spare keys or documents in the trunk.

This one should be no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how many people do this out of convenience.

3. Be wary of second-hand dealers and bike-mover companies.

When getting a bike from a second hand dealer, try to leave as little information as possible — no address, full name etc. More than often they are involved in the game. Same goes for motorcycle movers. Try to arrange your own transport whenever you can.

4. Is your bike a high-risk target?

If you own any of the following, brace yourself:

Super Sport

Harley

0–3 year old model

These are highest on the “shopping list” for thieves. Anything that is 7+ years old is unlikely to get stolen. Still, that doesn’t mean you can leave it unchained in the street, got it?

5. If someone already tried stealing your bike and failed, they WILL be back for it.

Get that bike someplace safe. NOW.

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6. If you just got a replacement for your stolen bike, they WILL be back for it.

While you are reaping that sweet sweet karma from your insurance, and enjoying your new pair of wheels, they are already putting you on the “to-do” list. See #5 for instructions.

an hero

7. There is no single-best security solution.

You first need to understand how the minds of thieves work. They will be looking for the fastest/most quiet way of stealing that bike. Therefore, a combination of security systems that look tedious to break will be the best solution. What does this mean? A best solutions is having ALL 3 of the following:

1) A disk lock on the REAR wheel

Do not buy anything that costs under $90–100. I’m serious. Best bet options would be something like this XENA Disk Lock or ABUS Disk Lock, both equipped with alarms. Cutting these locks will most probably not be an option, while removing a rear wheel is a lot harder/longer than the front one.

2) A chain lock going trough HARD PARTS of the bike

ex. frame, braced swingarm etc. If this is not an option, opt for sliding it through the rear wheel and placing the disk lock on the front one. Just make sure that you don’t chain it to a picket fence.

Pro-tip: try to have the chain as high as possible. When the chain is not near or touching the ground it’s a LOT harder to cut.

Same as the disk lock, don’t buy anything below $100. Some safe options are this KRYPTONITE Chain, this ABUS Chain or anything in the same category. Every thief has a pair of nice bolt-cutters that can cut trough any cheap chain. High-end chains will take a LOT more time to cut, as well as make a lot of noise. Time and noise are the thief’s worst enemy.

3) Lock the damn steering

Yes, I know some are very easy to break, but add it to the two above, and it’s just another item on the “time schedule”.

Note 1

In case you have LoJack or anything similar installed, make sure you keep the wiring and boxes out of the obvious places. They will definitely be looking for any non-OEM wires/hardware under the seat and tank. LoJack stickers are even worse; only maybe when you don’t actually have a gps unit, in which case — good job making them look. If you want to go really crazy, make/buy something like this and stick it in the headlights or something.

Note 2

In case you cover your bike with a tarp, get another cheaper lock with an alarm and use that to tie up the tarp around the bike. That’s an additional hassle for thieves; it makes noise, and they have no idea what’s waiting for them underneath in terms of security.

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8. Chain bikes one to another when travelling.

This one should be a no-brainer as well.

9. How to spot a “scout”?

Your bike will be scouted numerous time, and you better be sure that by now the thieves know your daily routine.

A common occurrence would be a person walking with a dog or a kid. What they are doing is checking for any devices that have alarms. If someone spots them while scouting, they can say the dog or kid tipped the alarm off.

10. So how is it done?

The average time thieves would spend on stealing a bike is 30 sec. The most they would dare spend is a couple of minutes. This is where the 3 points from #7 come to play — time.

The order of events being carried out during a job are the following:

The ignition is set up to be ready for start

Safety equipment removed (disk lock, chain)

Steering lock is snapped

Ignition is plugged, bike is started

The bike is taken out of sight and checked for GPS devices

Sometimes, the bike might be left someplace else in the neighbourhood; covered and locked up. In case your bike goes missing, make sure you scout the area for any covered bikes.

Final Note

A lot of this info came from posts and comments on /r/motorcycles, so I want to pay my respects where they are due.

Original Article : Medium

10-year-old boy murdered by the Taliban was hailed as a war hero If you’re like me, you’ve had at least one nightmare where your motorcycle gets stolen. The closest encounter I’ve had was when my neighbour got his CBR stolen, while mine was parked less than 10 meters (30 feet) away.