#I only know the first line dang

[lairn]

the client didn’t even wanna sing baby shark 😭 he wanted skinamarink and I don’t even know how to spell that 💔

literally watching baby shark videos to prep for fieldwork

[dazedantics]

Meeting the Graysons

(Ha I don't remember where I was going with this but it's been sitting in my drafts for a while)

There isn't much to see working behind the register at your local grocery store. Mostly you just sit there picking at your nails till a customer comes up and you have to print that friendly smile on your face. But there are days where you get to see some interesting people.

Like the family of eight that comes in all rowdy and shrieking as their tired mother pushes the cart. Or the quiet old man with his pampered ol' bulldog who never says a word and has a look in his eye that you just know means he's committed something long ago and would hunt you down if you ever found out. Or the entitled old ladies who point their sharp maroon nails at you while they drone on about why they should be given some big discount that you don't particularly hear word for word. Or that clean cut older gentleman who smiles under his thick mustache and says something so out of date but his voice is just so deep and dreamy that can't even remember what your name even is anymore.

Your bubble pops abruptly as you notice his ocean blue eyes watching you for longer than necessary. I mean, really, what ever will you do if he's to keep his attention so dashingly on you like that? Oh, wait- he's handing you money.

Oops.

Let's just check what exactly it costs again on the screen. That shirt looks very tight around his chest. Did he buy a lot? Around his arms too. You didn't even notice you'd been scanning and bagging his items the whole time. He's very muscular isn't he? What did he buy? Not that you'd mind finding out just how strong he was. Was he the fresh only, organic, let's save the planet type of guy? That's a very nice ring on his left hand's finger. Or was he- wait. OH MY GOD HE'S MARRIED?!

Nooo! How are you supposed to get that fairy tale ending now? He's supposed to be that hot corporate type who'd fall in love with you and whisk you away from your job to live the posh life with him! Cause he'd say "you're much to gorgeous to be working in a place like this!" And honestly, who could argue with that logic? Then he'd- oh, wait he's leaving. Out the door annnnd ... gone.

Dang it.

Well, there go your chances of living your dreams. Back to the same old creepsters tweakin' out in the back of the store. You didn't even catch the guy's name.

Oh well.

At least you'd have some fantasy fuel to live on for a week.

And so, you sit there again. Sighing and dissociating as the days go on, customers coming and going, paying as much attention to you as you do to them. Counting the minutes till you can ditch this place once and for all. And ... oh look, some nerd is stammering trying to buy something.

He's ... actually kinda cute. In a "couldn't exactly sweep you off your feet but could still make you swoon" typa way.

You gave him the store's default greeting. Definitely nice to look at, boyish charm exuded from his button up/sweatshirt combo. You scanned his items steadily. Yeah ... you could see a sweet future with this guy. You smiled as he started going on about something you hoped you wouldn't need to give an answer to. A few small picnics in the park, bookstore and museum dates, listening to him rant about stuff you don't understand. You nodded politely as he kept going on, digging into his pockets. Ooh, or maybe you'd have to be the one whisking him away from from his mundane life, flustering him with those smooth lines you've heard and making him be the one to imagine all the scenarios that you'd do, staring into his chocolaty brown eyes all day. And also- wait. Oops ... there he goes too.

And without a name either.

Maybe you should start to introduce yourself first, so whatever dreamboat you meet next feels inclined to give theirs.

You end up doing that for a bit, but a few of the customers remind you why you're always hiding your name tag under your work vest. I mean, couldn't the weirdos who stalk you from beyond the sliding doors be good-looking? At least then it would be easier for you to develop stockholm syndrome if they decide to ever knock you out behind the dumpsters at night.

Oh, another customer.

You scan her items and ... dang it! Why have so many of your customers been much more charming than you lately? This woman was all sleek business on the outside but sweet and considerate as she speaks to you. She sifts through her purse, rambling on about her family. Figures. Of course she'd have a family. Oh, but that means she probably prides herself on being wise, so maybe she'd be willing to give you life advice? You smile and nod, not sure what exactly you could say to relate to her story. Yeah, cause then she'd invite you to her house so she could be thorough with her explanations. She laughs softly, coffee brown eyes accompanied by tired bags under them. Ooh, and then you could offer to help her out with her kids and stuff! Then she'd be all grateful for you and thennnn- there she goes too.

Aw man, you thought with all her chatting she'd be those types to stick around long after getting her things bagged.

And no name again too.

Are you always destined to drop the ball before you ever even picked it up?

Alas, till one of those three romancers of yours decided to visit this store again, you had to make due with the delicately memory of them, carefully preserved in your head.

And hey, maybe you'd go out one day and run into them again.

And you wouldn't be silenced by your corporate hospitality. No, this time, you'd get their names.

And then you'd be able further lay out the plot of your heavily detailed imagined future with them.

[aventurineswife]

The reader is a true poet, and their tongue drips with honey. They just LOVE flirting and writing poetry for their partner. They're a true master at words of affirmation, and they always manage to catch people off guard and make them blush, especially their partner. But.. one day, their partner flirts back, a good line that catches the reader off guard. And to their partner’s surprise, the reader is a blushing mess and is suddenly unable to mutter a good reply to how flustered they were. And that's when their partner realizes that the reader isn't used to being put on the spot, so they tease them about it after being their victim for so long. (Veritas and Kaveh together, Robin, Dang heng, Ororon, Kinich).

Flustered by the Muse

Tags: Kaveh x Reader x Ratio, Robin x Reader, Dan Heng x Reader, Ororon x Reader, Kinich x Reader, Poet!Reader, Romance, Fluff, Teasing, Poetry, Humor, Emotional Vulnerability.

The sun dipped low in the sky, casting a soft golden light over the grand architecture Kaveh had so tirelessly designed. You sat beside him, your fingers grazing the stonework as your gaze lifted to the horizon. Your voice was a melody in the air, soft and sweet, as you recited a poem about the fleeting beauty of life and the desire to capture it in art. Kaveh’s eyes sparkled, always captivated by the way words flowed from your lips. His own passion for aesthetics never failed to resonate with your poetic nature.

Ratio, on the other hand, listened with a detached air, his eyes occasionally flicking toward you. His lips quirked up at your words, his brilliant mind quick to catch every nuance in your lines. When you finished, there was a brief pause, and then Kaveh gave you a gentle nudge, a playful smirk on his face.

"You do know, darling, I write a few lines of my own now and then," Kaveh teased, his voice light, full of warmth.

"Really?" you asked, your eyes sparkling. "Perhaps I should read them to see if they are worthy of my own."

Before Kaveh could answer, Veritas broke in, his usual seriousness giving way to something softer. "You know, my dear poet," he said, his voice surprisingly gentle, "I’ve heard many verses, but none have ever captured the true essence of beauty quite like you do. If I could capture even a fraction of that in my own work, I’d consider it a masterpiece."

The praise was unexpected, and it left you utterly speechless for a moment. You had always been the one to weave words that made others blush, but hearing Ratio—a man whose brilliance and sharp tongue were legendary—speak so earnestly left you flustered.

Your cheeks flushed as you fumbled for a response. "Y-You think so?" you managed to stammer, your usual composure slipping. You couldn’t help but be taken aback by his compliment, and for the first time, words failed you.

Kaveh chuckled, leaning closer with a teasing smile. "Oh? The great poet, struck speechless? I do believe this is the first time I’ve ever seen you like this."

Ratio's lips curled in a sly smile, and he leaned in, his voice dripping with amusement. "How curious, my dear poet, that the one who always has a word for everything is now lost for words."

Your blush deepened, and you tried to recover, but Kaveh’s teasing gaze and Veritas’s soft, sly smile made it impossible to keep your usual eloquence intact.

"I... Well," you stammered, a flustered mess, "It’s... you, both of you, just... caught me off guard."

Ratio's eyes twinkled with a knowing look as Kaveh winked at you. The teasing would never end, but somehow, you couldn’t bring yourself to mind. After all, your heart beat for them, and their playfulness only made you fall deeper.

Robin’s voice was as soothing as a lullaby, each note caressing the air with an ethereal grace. She sat beside you, humming softly to herself, her eyes closed in contentment as you absentmindedly stroked the strings of your lute. It wasn’t often that you shared such quiet moments with her, but tonight, the world felt peaceful, and the soft moonlight illuminated your surroundings like a scene from a dream.

"Do you know," you began, voice as smooth as the melody in the air, "that your voice is like the stars in the sky? I often wonder if the heavens themselves were jealous of such a gift."

Robin’s eyes fluttered open, a soft blush creeping across her cheeks at your words. You had always known how to make her heart skip, how to leave her lost for words with a mere phrase. She giggled, her voice light, yet filled with affection.

"Such flattery, my poet," she said, a teasing glint in her eyes. "You certainly have a way with words."

A smile tugged at your lips, and you leaned closer, your breath warm against her ear. "Flattery? No, my dear, I speak only the truth. How could anyone not be captivated by the melody of your voice? It’s a gift meant for the heavens, not mere mortals like me."

But Robin’s response caught you completely off guard.

"You know," she began, her voice low and playful, "I’ve always thought you were like the moon. No matter how much I gaze at you, I’m still drawn to the light you give off, and yet... there’s a quiet mystery to you. One that even I can’t seem to unravel."

You froze, the words tugging at your heartstrings. A blush blossomed on your cheeks, and you stammered in surprise. "I-I... I don’t know what to say to that," you managed, suddenly feeling uncharacteristically shy.

Robin’s lips quirked up, amused by your flustered reaction. "It’s not so easy, is it? To be the one caught off guard for once."

You tried to regain your composure, but the warmth in your cheeks only deepened. For once, you had no clever lines or words of affirmation to return. You were the one who was speechless, left vulnerable by her unexpected flirtation.

"I... You make it so hard to think straight, Robin," you muttered, still trying to find your footing. "I never thought I’d be the one rendered speechless."

Robin chuckled, her laughter gentle and warm, and she leaned closer, her fingers brushing yours. "Well, now you know how it feels, my dear poet."

The quiet hum of the Astral Express was the perfect backdrop to your poetry. Dan Heng sat nearby, his usual calm expression betraying nothing of his inner thoughts as you recited verses that spoke of love, loss, and the fleeting beauty of the cosmos. His gaze was steady, always watchful, but today, there was something different about the way he listened.

You felt the familiar tug in your heart as you spoke, the words flowing effortlessly from your lips. "Do you ever wonder, Dan Heng," you asked softly, "if the stars are nothing more than the dreams of forgotten souls, illuminating the night with their bittersweet glow?"

Dan Heng’s eyes softened, the quiet intensity within them a rarity. "Perhaps," he mused, his voice quiet but sincere, "but maybe it’s not just the stars that are forgotten. Perhaps we, too, are pieces of the past, just waiting to be remembered."

Your heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, all you could do was blink at him in surprise. You had always been the one to leave others speechless, yet here was Dan Heng, his words striking you like a lightning bolt.

"I... I don’t know what to say to that," you murmured, flustered, suddenly aware of the growing heat in your cheeks.

Dan Heng’s lips twitched into a slight smile, his usual reserved nature momentarily giving way to something more teasing. "Does the great poet not have a clever reply? I suppose I’m not so easy to impress after all."

You tried to collect your thoughts, but your mind was a jumble of emotions, your usual eloquence lost in the fluster of being caught off guard. "It’s just... I didn’t expect you to—" You broke off, unable to form a coherent thought.

Dan Heng chuckled softly, his voice as calm as ever. "It seems that even the poet can be rendered speechless."

You could only sigh, your cheeks still glowing with embarrassment. "I... I’ll get you back for this, Dan Heng."

He merely raised an eyebrow, his smile ever so slight. "I’ll be waiting."

The night was quiet, with only the rustle of leaves and the soft wind breaking the silence. Ororon sat beside you, his unusual eyes shimmering in the moonlight as he spoke in his cryptic manner. He often intrigued you, his philosophical musings and abstract language always leaving you with more questions than answers.

"You see, names are not just sounds, but meanings," Ororon said, his gaze fixed on the stars above. "In this world, names hold more weight than anyone realizes. And yet, there is beauty in the fact that we often forget their significance."

You grinned, your poetic nature coming to the forefront. "Oh, Ororon," you said softly, "you speak of names, but your words themselves carry the weight of meaning. I could call you anything, and yet nothing would capture the depth of your essence."

Ororon’s eyes flicked toward you, his mouth curling slightly. "But you must not forget, poet, that it is not the name that matters, but the one who bears it. Perhaps, in time, you will learn that."

You opened your mouth to respond, your usual eloquence ready to flow, but Ororon’s next words took you completely by surprise.

"And perhaps, you are just as lost in your own words as I am in mine."

Your breath caught in your throat. Ororon had, for once, turned the tables, and you found yourself utterly speechless, your usual confidence shattered in an instant. You felt your face heat up, an awkward silence hanging between you two.

"Ah," Ororon mused, a soft laugh escaping his lips. "It seems the poet has been caught off guard. How curious."

You tried to compose yourself, but the words failed you. "I... I wasn’t expecting that."

Ororon raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. "It seems that even you can be rendered silent. A rare sight indeed."

The jungle was alive with sounds as Kinich made his way through the dense foliage, you trailing quietly behind him. The two of you had become accustomed to this quiet, practical life of hunting and survival, but there was something about the way the light filtered through the trees that made you feel poetic today.

"Kinich," you said, your voice soft, "I wonder, if I could put all of the world’s beauty into words, would it be enough? Or would it pale in comparison to the raw, untamed beauty of this place?"

Kinich glanced over his shoulder, his expression unreadable. "Words can describe, but they will never capture the true essence of something. Only through experience can you understand its beauty."

You nodded, considering his words, but you couldn’t help but add, "But don’t you think that words can capture feelings? The way a moment makes you feel, deep inside? I believe words are capable of that."

Kinich turned fully to face you, his intense gaze meeting yours. "If you’re talking about feelings," he said, his voice suddenly low and direct, "then I’ll say this: the way you make me feel when you speak? I’m not sure words could ever describe it."

You froze, taken completely off guard by his words. You had always been the one to make others blush with your poetic affirmations, but Kinich had just done the same to you, leaving you speechless.

Your face flushed as you stammered, trying to find the right words to respond. "I... You... You think so?" you managed, suddenly unable to speak in your usual fluid manner.

Kinich raised an eyebrow, the smallest smirk playing at his lips. "It seems I’ve caught the poet off guard. How interesting."

You swallowed hard, your heart racing. "I... don’t know how to reply to that."

Kinich’s smirk deepened, and he stepped closer, his voice playful. "Perhaps you’ve finally met your match."

[dansformations]

"Man of the future"

Alan was 20 years old gay guy that turned his passion for video games into a career as a streamer. Every night, he sat in front of his computer, illuminated by the lights of his setup, and connected to play with his thousands of followers enchanted by the fact of having a popular gay and handsome streamer. That night, however, something different happened.

While chatting with his audience and viewing the comments in the chat, he noticed a message that stood out among the others.

@ yourbroski: "Try this game, 'Man of the Future'," said a donation message with a link.

@ yourbroski: "Its my game, i create It"

- You Did!? No way - Alan replied

He clicked the link, opening the Game just for being nice, the title didnt sounded like something that the girly Alan would enjoy.

Within seconds after the click, Alan found himself downloading a game he had never heard of. The title, "Man of the Future," glowed on the screen.

The game was a complicated obstacle course and shooter that quickly engrossed Alan into the digital word.

- Hey, this is indeed fun

But the fun ended quickly. When he died in the game for the first time - Which was pretty fast -, a screen appeared with the saying, "C'mon Bro, you can do better" along with an strange music, almost hipnotazing music.

- Whoa, did you guys see that? - Alan said, leaning back in his chair. - This game is savage! 'C'mon Bro, you can do better'? Challenge accepted! - he answered.

However, the second attempt didn’t go any better. When Alan died again, the message changed to, "Don’t be a noob, Bro."

Alan face reddened with frustration. "Okay, Bro," he muttered under his breath.

- No way am I letting this game call me a noob. Let's do this! - He turned to the chat, determination blazing in his eyes. -You guys with me? This game’s going down, Bros!

Took a sip of His... beer? He didnt remenber being drinking beer, he didnt even remenber enjoying beer but he was so centred on beating that game that kinda ignored It.

- OOOOOUUURRRP - he belched - dang, sorry bros - he said a bit ashamed... Just a bit. He was too centred to being ashamed.

Meanwhile the coments were going crazy.

"Whats happening With all those 'Bro'? Thats off character"

"@ yourbroski: Nothing to be ashamed! Better out than inside my Bro!"

"Are we sure this Is Alan? Lol"

He keep playing moving his fingers as fast as he could, he was doing Better and when he almost reached the wining flag - a flag decorated only With White and black lines - he got killed by another player.

- Son of a bitch! - he yelled - that motherfucker killed me at the very last BRARRRRP - belched - moment!

"Dont be a pussy" The screen said this time, as knowing he was whining.

- No way this game just called me a "pussy"! - he said ofended - Im not, and in gonna show them all - he said while opening his legs in the chair in a more relaxed position, tooking a moment to scracht his balls in front everybody before starting the new round.

In that position everybody could apreciate some strong arms and legs that people didnt knew Alan had abd Alan didnt remenber to have worked on.

"Sexy" a guy comented.

He was gay, but for some reason reading that from a guy, maked him feel angry.

- Dont be a weirdo, dude - he said

He was gay, right..?

Then started playing again, not releasing every time his character died, a part of His persona did too.

Yelling, coursing, chugging beer and burping, acting with a cocky attitude more and more, every round, less nice, less gay, less him, until...

- BROS, I-OARRRRRP -He couldnt contain a burp - I DID IT!

His character was holding that black and White flag.

"Now youre a real alpha" the tv screen said With that strange music still.

"Now youre the Man of the future"

And with that, the remains of Alan were erased, he didnt remenber being a girly gay guy anymore, he always had been an alpha, a straight, gassy, jock that loved playing videogames and humillating the noobs and "queerdos" on the games.

Alan started doing a "celebration dance" that basically was doing hip moviments to show his bulge. Like he were fucking someone.

- This Is for you, @broski - Alan put His microphone close to his ass and ripped a big, loud, smelly fart on It - i beated you - he said proud. Between laughs he added - Nah, GG bro, youre talented, definetly gonna share It with the bros.

"Whats happening with Him?!' someone comented

"@ yourbroski: That flag send the fag away"

Alan didnt even read those coments, he was busy trying to fan away the fart with his hands.

That Night the strange transformartion of the gay gamer Alan was trending everywhere, but before His friend Group had read something, they receive link to a Game from Alan.

"Alan: Best game of the month broskis"

The group of friends made up of gay guys and nice straight guys thought Alan's writing was odd, but without knowing the situation they gave more atention to the link, opening it, ready to play a life-changing game, "The man of the future."

(This is just fetish writing)

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Lucky Seven

Debut: Mario Kart 7

Yesterday was Mario Day, the anniversary of this blog's creation! It has now been SEVEN dang years of this blog existing, and that is so weird! The blog could be in second grade right now! It could be learning about insect metamorphosis! Isn't that splendid? Of course, we already taught it all we know about insects, so it is rather bored in class. It's become a real Class Clown. And we wouldn't have it any other way! We love Silly!

For the seventh anniversary, I decided to make the most Seven post ever. The only thing that could make this any more Seven is if I deleted every other post besides the first six, making this the seventh post on the blog. But that would be tomfoolishness, which is distinct from tomfoolery, and where I draw the line.

So here is the Lucky Seven! From Mario Kart 7! It gives Seven items at once, as a reference to how lucky Seven is in slot machines, since Nintendo loves to dance around with cheeky little gambling references without going too far into actually portraying it. Seven items is nothing to sneeze at, so don't even think about sneezing right now! If you sneeze with this item active, you might end up completely missing its window of usefulness, because it is very mediocre, to be honest.

A Banana, Green Shell, Red Shell, Bob-omb, Star, Mushroom, and Blooper all orbit the kart, and you use the one directly in front of you when you press the item button. That makes it basically impossible to use the Green Shell effectively, since you have such a limited time to launch it! Usually most of these things will either be thrown out willy-nilly, or collided with by an opponent who is driving nilly-willy. But it could even end up feeling rather wimmy-nimmy for you and nibby-wibby for your opponent, because they could steal your Mushroom or even your Star! It ends up feeling more like an item that Makes Stuff Happen than one that necessarily Helps You. That's not very lucky. I'd sooner call it crazy! Like another, later item, focusing on the number... oh, I shan't say.

I'd like to point out how the Seven is not a physical thing. It's a mere symbol, unlike any other item! This could not be held if it tried. It even gets a background in the item roulette, which is really weird, to be honest! It is pulling out all the stops to make this occasion about itself! I'll let it slide, since this occasion is indeed about it.

Lucky Seven is such a Seven item. It would be a bit silly to see it in a game outside Mario Kart 7! Now let's look at it in Mario Kart Tour.

Mario Kart Tour is basically mobile Mario Kart 7 with worse gameplay and less Honey Queen, so I guess Lucky Seven is right at home here, or at least it's sleeping over on the couch here. If your character is upgraded enough, they can unleash the power of Lucky Seven PLUS, which adds three coins. That's not seven anymore, but it is certainly seven plus three. I shall accept this as well.

So, overall, Lucky Seven is okay. It's somewhat interesting. If only it was a bit more interesting, though. This post wasn't even about any Mario Creatures! Have we fallen from grace?

"Hey! Welcome to Game Guy's Mini-Game!"

Oh? Game Guy? Our friend Game Guy from Mario Party 3 and the Game Guy post? That Game Guy?

"Let's see... I think I'll have you play my personal favorite. Game Guy's Lucky 7!"

Yahoo! Game Guy always knows how to get the party started! What a sevendipitous turn of events!

[baestruly]

the difference between calls ━━ peter sutherland

( 𝗌𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌 )  peter sutherland x fem!reader

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚ IN WHICH there’s an obvious comparison between peter’s first call from you and a call he receives when you are together. when it comes to your safety, peter doesn't play.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 - hurt/comfort, panic attacks, kidnapping, reader is rose's sister

𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 ━━━━━━━━

Peter sat at his desk, the pen tapping rhythmically against the worn wood. A mountain of paperwork loomed over him ━━ shit, he was behind on that, he never got much sleep, figuring it could wait as he stared blankly at the moving pen. 

The sharp sound of ringing made his heart skip a beat. There was no covering the fact peter strived and wished he had a little more than just a desk job ━━ answering calls, more specifically ━━ he lived for the thrill. It was evident from his heart thundering in his chest. answering the night agent's phone was a step up from being a 911 operator, at least. 

Until━━ 

“Go ahead.” He said smoothly, his pen turning in the same hand as he rested his elbow on the desk. 

“Um━━uh, night action! night action━━” 

The frantic voice on the other end made Peter stiff. The pen stopped twirling between his fingers. 

“Yes, hello. Code, please.” He replied, like countless times before. Peter grabbed his binder out from under the desk on the shelf and opened it in front of him, flipping through the pages with his one free hand. 

“Please, you have to help up━━oh my god, my sister━━me━━they’re coming after us!” If even possible, the voice was more frantic, gasps heaving in and out from what Peter recognized as a panic attack or something along the lines. 

This didn’t seem like his usual business toned atmosphere once he answered. It sounded like they had got the wrong number, he never dealt with situations like this, especially from people who didn’t seem like they knew what to do with the number and him across the line.

“Ma'am, if you don’t have a code━━it seems like you have the wrong number━━” 

“No! I have ur flippi━━I have the code gimme a second.” The girl spat. Peter bites his cheek as he hears whispering on the phone━━likely the woman’s sister.  “Okay! It’s table, clock, water, fire. You got it, did you━━” 

“Yes, I got it.” Peter interrupted, eyes flying through pages in a matter of seconds. Settling on the 80th page, he looks at the code that was given to him. “Is this Benwire or Ramese?” 

“What? What even is that?” A pause followed, filled with nervous energy. “They just told us to tell you the code; I don’t know who these people are?” 

More whispering ━━ frantically. Peter’s chest tightened as he heard sobbing in the background. This sounded like something 911 would have to deal with. 

“What street did your friend Morsese live on?” 

The question just seemed to make the hyperventilating worse. 

“Maam, are you okay? I can dispatch you to 911 if you’re in any dang ━━ ” 

“No, they told us to call you ━━ this number, they made sure of it! God knows they’re probably fucking dead.”

“Whose they?” Peter sat up straighter, urgency sharpening his instincts as he abandoned the paperwork 

“Our aunt and uncle, Emma and Henry. Campbell. Emma and Henry Campbell.” 

Peter bit his cheek more, holding the phone in a wave of silence. It was clear this girl was probably on the brink of passing out; she wasn’t breathing right. But she wasn’t the only one clueless, Peter had no idea who she was talking about either. 

Peter always had his protective instinct towards others in danger ━━ it came in hand with him working in the FBI. If this girl's aunt and uncle told her to call the line it could have some relevance in later reports━━but he wasn’t going to hang up on her yet. 

“Hello━━?” 

“I’m here. Run me through what’s happening, who’s after you?” Peter asked, his tone less harsh, preparing to do what he thinks he’s always done best ━━ just like on the metro ━━ save people. 

𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 ━━━━━━━━━

There was something Peter should be used to ━━ but now, with you in his life ━━ he never could be. It was the constant stress he was under, with you being associated with him and not knowing the minute something could blow up and ruin everything. 

Ruin your life. 

It’s why Peter has such a hard time leaving you in your guy’s apartment every day so he can go to work. In that shitty basement when he would much rather be spending every growing second by your side, ready to jump at anything that could put you in harm's way. 

Everything in the white house was total shit ━━ no one could trust anyone. But it’s been a few months since the attack at Camp David. Peter was offered a job as a night agent to serve in the field ━━ but decided to keep it safe, taking smaller jobs in the white house assigned by the president after what seemed like an ongoing thank you ever since he helped save her from the bombs. 

But he had no complaints ━━ and neither did you. He’s looked happier than he ever has, coming home and wrapping his big arms around you was his favourite part of the day, inhaling the soft vanilla scents of your (y/h/c) hair, bringing him to the present and the reality of it all, how the world brought him to you ━━ even in the worst circumstances.

Peter had no idea that these circumstances would repeat themselves.

After kissing you goodnight, he headed out, waiting the usual time he did outside the office door as the clock hit midnight. 

Peter nodded to his coworker in a firm greeting before entering and closing the door. He wasn’t sure how much time passed once he sat in that seat ━━ but the calls were quiet as they had been for the past few days. He didn’t work as much time on the phone as how Diane assigned him ━━ he got to get out a bit and work on other things, too. 

Then, after not hearing the old ━━ but familiar ring for a while, Peter’s head snaps towards it as it shakes once. He grabbed it quickly, unable to stop himself from imagining he could be on the other end. 

“Hello━━” 

“Peter Sutherland.” 

Peter’s brows snap together in alert and confusion, blinking a few times before shifting and resting his elbow on the table. 

“Code, please.” He’s said it many times before. 

“This is going to go very differently.” But he’s never heard that.

There’s a muffled scream. 

Or that. Was it━━ 

Fuck, he was not doing this, not today. Immediately, he jumped up, his chair flying back and almost hitting the back grey wall. 

“Who the fuck are you ━━ if you do anything to her ━━” 

“Yes, yes, I've heard that line many times before, during your whole night agent spiel a few months ago…you guys are really cute, the perfect partners in crime.” He laughed, it sounded awful, painful even. Peter’s head was racing, which seemed to match his heart. “Even recognized your scream right away, isn’t that right, sweetheart?” 

That was it. Peter pushed the chair out of his way as he paced around the room, fists balling together. He could hear your cries in the background, and his mind brought him back ━━ when you had been so scared, being prone to panic attacks under stress. 

And he couldn’t do a single fucking thing right now because he wasn’t already there. 

“Just tell me what you know about what happened with your dad, and then━━” 

“Fuck you.” Peter spat, hands angrily raking through his hair ━━ he hated how the caller knew how to get under his skin but he wasn’t going to let his guard down when it came to you, he needed to think ━━ he had to. 

“Ooh! we’ve got a bite. That’s not what the lovely lady wants to hear as her last words, I'm sure.” 

There's more shuffling. 

“Peter━━Peter,” your voice cracks, twisting into a desperate whisper, raw and fractured. “Please come back.” 

Peter’s heart stops hearing your voice in such a state, eyes widening with stress and concern. He can’t even picture you right now or he might have to sit down. He knew he could stall the caller to buy them some time so they could get to you without alerting him. 

“Hey ━━ hey, baby, it’s okay, you’re going to be okay. I’m right here, and I'm going to be there, you gotta hold on for me, I know you can.” Peter abandons his usual name for you after that sick man used it as a taunt towards you, he couldn’t cloud your vision and get his voice mixed up with the callers in your already jumbled brain. He knew how terrified you were because he’s seen it through the countless sleepless nights and panic attacks. But it was all coming true, and Peter wanted to curse himself for letting this even happen, your worst nightmares that he promised so deeply to protect you from. 

A sniffle escapes from your end, the silence hanging heavy, a chilling agreement that doubles as a ticking clock. Peter thinks before hearing an even quieter whisper, barely heard.

“He’s got a gun━━took down both guards, but I think he’s planning on jumping out the big window, his buddy is coming in his truck.” 

Your voice is extremely shaky, but Your words shake him to his core. Peter steadies himself, whispering, “Okay.” Stopping his frantic pacing, he speaks as clearly as his racing heart allows. “(y/n), we’re coming for you. The FBI will surround the house, but I need to hang up and alert everyone. Just nod like you’re still on the phone with me until he takes it, alright, baby?”  

Your voice quivered in return with a sniff, yes. Peter squeezed his eyes shut and slammed the phone down without a second thought, running to the conference room to get someone to immediately track the call in case he kept the phone on him if they got to the truck ━━ shit ━━ before they could. If anything, they could trace the calls or texts he’s made to his buddy.

He was running like a madman ━━ alerting the night agent team members. It was all a blur once he grabbed his gun and vest and drove out of there, police sirens going off everywhere and other agents' SUVS speeding close behind him. 

Peter jumps out of the car, barely having time to slam his car door closed as he’s already looking at the fifth-floor windows ━━ wondering what the fuck you meant by jumping out the fucking window into his buddy's truck? Because if you had anything to do with being entangled in that escape, this man would never see the end of it. He would hunt him down ━━ but he wouldn’t kill him. He’d make him live with horrible bruises and broken bones, and once he goes to the hospital, he’s taken to jail for not only assault but for interfering with private information and everything that happened with his father. 

This man would never see the fucking light because of how many times Peter would knock him flat out. 

Raising his gun, he carefully follows behind many other agents dressed in all black, whipping his gun in all open doors as he runs down the hallway and up the flights upstairs ━━ orders being yelled in the background.   

His legs were outrunning his brain, screaming at him to stop running because of how exhausted he was ━━ but finally, he reached the door. “FBI, OPEN THIS DOOR━━” 

“Peter!” Your panicked scream breaks through the noise, the sound driving him to force the door open, gun at the ready, prepared to confront whatever horror lay inside.

But then he sees you. 

In an instant, his gun drops to his side as he looks down at you, arms tied around the banister in the middle of the kitchen and living room. You know you must have looked like total shit as he abandons any proper FBI protocol and falls beside you, concerned eyes locking with yours as if they’re holding onto you for the only source of comfort while his hands untie yours quickly. 

Your glossy eyes, stinging with tears and probably drugs from how drowsy you were feeling for the past hour, started pooling with tears. It definitely wasn’t because of the drugs. 

You choked out a sob, one that's been buried in your chest for what feels like forever, as you startled into a coughing fit once Peter immediately wrapped his arms around you, staying kneeled on the ground because you had no energy to even attempt to stand, you were too shaky and would probably collapse the moment you put any weight on your legs. 

“You’re here; you made it back.” You whisper into his shoulder, already soaked with tears, breath hitching as your body trembles against his.

You could feel Peter’s relieved smile. “I know, I’m here. I’m so sorry this happened sweeth━━” 

He paused as if something shocked him. 

“Peter, it’s okay━━” 

“No ━━ no, it’s not.” He was still knelt, now facing you once you pulled away, hand rubbing his temples. “You’ve been traumatized enough, and me not taking the night agent job ━━ I could’ve been here, protecting you. But I left you, now he’s messed with your head, I can tell.” 

You shut your eyes tight, a quiet sigh escaping you, and that sigh only serves to unleash a fresh wave of tears, cascading down your cheeks. Despite Peter’s stressed state, he softly wiped them away. 

“You’re perfect. Your head, how you think ━━ everything about you, (y/n), and when somebody messes with that, it messes me up because I cannot physically allow myself to let that happen to you.” He takes your hands in his gently, turning them first and looking around your body for any signs of harm. You hated how he beat himself up for not being able to protect you. But he did help, he found you, and his idea about staying on the phone bought the other agents some time to track him down. 

You wince to yourself upon noticing he’s looking at the ━━ what are probably now ━━ agonizing bruises on your jaw and throat. You’ve taken punches before. It wasn’t anything new, they hurt like a bitch, though. 

Peter’s thumb glides against the tender, purple skin as his other fingers come to the back of your head in your hair, just behind your ear, and you lean into his comforting touch. “I’m sorry.” He wretched, keeping his hand in your hair and bringing your head to his chest. 

The two of you sit just like that, grounding yourselves through each other's mangled breaths. 

The right people can cloud right judgement is what Peter’s father always said. It makes your job harder when you have someone to lose. Peter made a promise to himself that night as you both lay under the covers, his thumb running circles over your knuckles. 

He promised himself he wouldn’t work behind that shitty desk again. 

Then, he would visit that sick man behind bars.

 masterlist peter sutherland masterlist

ty for reading!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Sugar Cookie

Warnings: non/dubcon, allusions to abuse and neglect, oral sex, manipulation, and other dark elements. Not all kinks or triggers are tagged. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Summary: You try to learn some new traditions for your first Christmas with Tony.

Character: Tony Stark

Day Eleven of the December Daze Challenge.

Prompt - experiencing a new festive tradition 

Note: As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You stare at the floating screen and suck in your cheeks. It's only your first try but you're feeling overwhelmed. Just like always, you can't follow simple directions. You're a fuck up. 

It makes you wonder how you ever ended up here. In this immaculate kitchen with its shining marble counter tops, sparkling appliances, and many gadgets and accessories. Silver pans dangle from the rack hung over the island and knives are stuck to the magnet hold mounted on the wall. Yet you've made a mess of it all as flour dusts over the gold-veined surface and the smell of burnt dough tinges your nostrils. 

"Miss, is appears you've burnt the snickerdoodles," Friday says in her matter-of-fact way. 

"I did," you groan and plant your elbows on the counter, cup your chin in defeat. "I'm sorry." 

"You don't need to apologise to me," she assures. "You should start again at step one. 'Preheat the oven to 375 Farenheit...' 

"The oven's still on, you drone as you turn your face down. "I've ruined it all. I tried so hard but it's just all spoiled." 

"Miss, you can try again. I've already ordered more ingredients so that you can make everything," she insists. 

You puff. That dang computer. Of course, Tony insists that isn't what she is. She's a companion. She's more than code and she's a lot smarter than you, so you should listen. 

You push yourself up as you stick your lip out pathetically. You've never baked before. Tony knows this but it's a tradition. Not your tradition. You never even celebrated Christmas before. You watched it on the old VHS'. The films about daughters or sons or lovers trying to make it home for the holiday. Stuck between four walls, you always just assumed it was another fantasy. 

"Miss, you should dump the burnt cookies. They are not fit for consumption. And put a fresh sheet of parchment paper down." 

You nod and do as she says. Your hands are still fettered in the oven gloves as you take the tray and carry it to the bin. She opens it and you wince. You're still not used to that. 

You return to the counter and pull off the thick gloves. You tear off a new sheet of parchment and lay it on the pan. A frown tugs at your cheeks until they hurt. What if you can't do this? What if you disappoint Tony? He'd just be another person who you let down. There may not be many of those, but you can count everyone you've known on one hand. 

"Begin with the topping," Friday directs you. "Combine the granulated sugar and cinnamon together in a small bowl..." 

It's easier to let her tell you what to do. Almost like she's thinking for you. Tony does that too. He tells you what needs to be done so you're not so worried. Sometimes though, it's too much. All those expectations. Before, you were only ever expected to be quiet. 

You make three lines of four. The dough balls are perfectly arranged. Now you just need to not mess them up. 

"I would be happy to set a timer, miss." Friday offers. 

"Thanks," you say over your shoulder as you slide the pan into the oven. 

"You've made enough dough for three more batches. In the meantime, you could begin on the fruitcake," she suggests. 

"Uh, sure," you agree. 

"Mmm, smells like a fire," Tony's voice jars you before the companion-programmed interface can give her next command. "What're we workin' on, beautiful?" 

You face him and press your sweaty palms to the red apron with the frill edging. "Cookies. Or cake--" 

"There are a dozen snickerdoodles cooking with eleven minutes and thirty-one seconds left," Friday supplies. "And she was about to begin the fruitcake." 

You cringe and nod, "what she said." 

"What about the meringues? Peppermint? Just like I said?" He asks. 

"Sure, uh," you gulp, "you know, Mr. Stark, Tony... I'm not very good at this." 

"You'll get better, beautiful. Besides, it's tradition." 

"Y-yeah, I know, but I... I don't want to screw up or make you sick." 

"Baby, you're just fine. I know you can do it." He steps closer and puts his hands on your arms, "I see what no one else saw in you, huh? You got potential, you just gotta try." 

"I am. Trying, sir," you say. 

"I know, beautiful," he reaches to tap the end of your nose. "Don't be so mopey, alright? Look at all you got; a gorgeous kitchen, a gorgeous house, a gorgeous man..." 

You flick your lashes shyly and look away. He leans in and you let him kiss you. That's getting easier, even if the other things still hurt. 

"You know, there's nothing else I could ask for," he purrs as he draws back, "well, maybe one thing. Whiskey?" 

He looks at you with his deep brown eyes and that crooked grin. It was that look that comforted you the day you met. When the red and gold receded and revealed the very human man beneath. The first man you knew that didn't loathe you outright. 

"Yes, Tony," you answer and spin around. The liquor cabinet opens as you approach. You thank Friday and take out the dark bottle. A cupboard opens and you pull out a glass to pour. You bring the drink to him and smile nervously. "Here you are." 

"You know, seeing as this is your first Christmas and all, you're learning all my traditions," he leans a hand on the counter and sniffs the whiskey before he sips. You watch him tentatively, "we could start a few new ones." 

"New?" You echo curiously. 

He winks and takes another swig, "yeah, all this sweetness," he looks around at the cluttered ingredients, "I'm thinking something even sweeter."  

"Oh?" You bring your hands together and wring them. "What's that?" 

"Friday, scram," he looms close to you and sets his glass down.  

"Reconfiguring to standby," Friday responds promptly. 

He steps up and frames your hips with his hands. He sucks his teeth as he looks you up and down. You shiver as you're reminded of the night before. 

"How about you hop up here?" He keeps one hand on you as he sweeps aside the bag of flower and canister of baking powder with his other. "And feed me another kinda dessert." 

You look at him. You think you know what he means but you’re not sure. You’ll be embarrassed if you’re right. The last time he tried that you couldn’t stay still. 

“Oh,” you bat your lashes. 

“Oh,” he repeats coyly as he squeezes your hip. “You’re doing all this work, baby, why don’t you let me do some?” 

“Um, later... er, the cookies--” 

“I got a hankering for something better than cookies,” he grabs at your skirt and shoves his hands under the hem. He gropes your ass suddenly as he pulls you flush to him. You squeal in surprise. “What are these?” He pinches the fabric of your panties. “I didn’t pull these out.” 

“Uh, I...” you gulp. You didn’t think he’d be unhappy, you can see through every pair he gave you. “I’m sorry.” 

“Take ‘em off,” his voice deepens as he lets you go and steps back. He crosses his arms as his lips straighten to a dire expression. “Now.” 

“Yes, sir,” you blanch and open, your thumbs catching on your skirt before you can get the panties down. 

You teeter as you shove them to your knees and they fall to your feet. You bend to untangle them and stand. Tony takes them from you and flings them without looking. 

“Now, baby, I’m ready for the full course,” He takes you by the waist and turns your back to the counter. “You gonna serve it up to me?” 

You stare at him, speechless. His thumbs curl into your stomach then ease. He trails his hands to your hips and you yelp as he lifts you. You land on the counter and knock over a bowl as you slap your palms on the marble. 

“Tony!” You squeal. 

He hushes you as he raises the apron and your dress up your thighs, “open up for me, beautiful.” 

“Please, can’t we wait--” 

“I’ve been waiting,” he growls and bends before you can stop him. Not that you would even try. 

He grazes your thigh with his lips and his facial hair tickles you. You quiver as he nuzzles along the crease of your leg and against your pelvis. You tense as he grips your knees, holding them wide as he shoves his mouth against your cunt. 

You cry out again. You spasm as his tongue glides between your lips. His flicks around your clit and you whine. It’s so sensitive you could explode. 

You grasp the back of his head and try to push him away, “it’s still too much--” 

He hums and keeps going, ignoring your protests as he suckles on your bud. The pressure is enough to make you buck. You lean back on your arm and hiss. He puts his hand over yours and presses it to his skull, as if to make you urge him on. 

He wiggles his head as he eats you up unabashedly. He snarls and groans and laps. You whimper and shake, your insides consumed in flames. You can hardly stand the heat as he seeps through to your skin. You push your nails into his scalp and murmur his name. 

“Mmm, delicious,” he slithers against your thigh, pressing a wet kiss to your leg. 

You close your eyes as the sight of his head just peeking out beneath the rumpled apron makes you blush. You bite your lip and shudder as he goes back to his eager tending. He clutches your hand tighter as his tongue swirls around and around. 

The smell of smoke tinges your nose again. You sniff and flutter your lashes. You open your eyes and see the silver curls climbing out of the stove. You squeak and try to twist free of Tony. He grabs your thighs and sinks in fingertips in until you ache. 

“Ton-y,” you eke out, “the cook-ies!” 

“Leave em,” He growls as he snakes his hands under your thighs and hooks his arms around them. He yanks you so you fall onto your back, splaying wider as you crush mixing spoons and bags of chocolate chips and sugar. “I got more than enough right here.” 

[meanbossart]

Oh boy, VaM is kind of a trial and error experience LOL I couldn't really show you how to use the interface and stuff without a whole video or something, but it's not THAT difficult to get a hang of if you just give yourself a day or two to play around, not to mention the number of tutorials you find out there. Luckily, if you only want to use it as a reference software that makes the process far easier (to this day I have no idea how to animate on that thing, since that's not what I use it for)

As for how I use it, it's pretty self explanatory - if there's a complicated pose I want to draw but I'm either having trouble with it, or just want to double-check angles/anatomy, I will use it as a resource! I use for most of my "proper" pieces (y'know, the nicer looking ones) and every once in a while for my silly comics if I'm having trouble with a pose.

Lets use this drawing for example (the character on top of DU drow belongs to @namespara )

I don't draw a lot of mud-wrestling (shocking, I know) but I had an idea of the kind of pose I wanted them to be in. So the very first thing I did was make a rough sketch of what I was envisioning:

I often do a rough sketch first, even If I know I'm going to be pulling the program up because A) It's less tedious than adjusting the models over and over again until I pick a pose and B) because sometimes I'll decide I don't need the reference, after all, and so that's 30 minutes I'll have spared myself of playing around on the software.

Now, this is a pretty complicated pose! It's in a weird angle and the bodies are making contact in ways I'm not used to depicting, so I did choose to whip out VaM for this one. I went into the program and after some messing around, I flopped my little dolls together like this:

Now something really cool about VaM is that you can completely customize your models, and if you have the patience, I would definitely encourage you to do so! Obviously, you don't have to make picture perfect replicas of every single character you have, but as you can see here I have made a DU drow "decoy" to help me better understand some of his features when I draw him: he has a strong brow, a short nose, a square jawline - these are all going to look a very specific way from certain angles, and I might not always be sure of how to draw it right! So it's useful to have models that bear SOME semblance to the character so you can better understand how different viewpoints will affect their bone structure and mass.

Also thank fucking god for the elf-ear slider. Figuring out how to draw those shits from certain angles was a huge pain in the ass when I started drawing DnD races.

So, with the reference in hand, I go over the sketch again:

Now you may notice that I don't stick to the reference 100%. There's three reasons for this:

posing on VaM is tedious as hell. You can get something incredibly natural looking and picture-perfect to reference from if you wish, but it's going to take you hours to do. So, for the most part I just slap guys together until the results are "close enough" and use that.

In my opinion, you should always aim to ENHANCE your reference material, not replicate it exactly!

While VaM is a PRETTY DANG GOOD source of anatomical reference, it isn't perfect, I often supplement it with further reference from real life resources or make tweaks based on my own knowledge where I catch it falling short (and, antithetical to what I just said, I sometimes fuck the anatomy up further on purpose if I think it looks better that way LOL it's all jazz baby).

Then lines, color, yada yada. I don't have a tutorial on that and I don't think I could make one, because my process is chaotic as hell, but I do at times use Virt-a-mate as loose reference for lighting too when coloring - waaaaayyyy less so however, because that process is even more tedious and I feel like I often get better results by just winging it. It is a feature of the program though, and I'm sure it would be helpful for someone who has a difficult time visualizing lights and shadows. I only started using this program a few months ago, so I happened to already have a pretty good understanding of that kind of thing and just don't personally feel like I get much out of that particular mechanic.

Here's a few other examples of pieces that I made reference for (WARNING: Suggestive)

Now, for the question many of you may want to ask:

"Can I trace this junk?"

And to that, I say: Buddy, you can do whatever the hell you want with the reference material you created.

However,

If your goal is to learn and improve your art, and to recreate realistic proportions and anatomy from memory, tracing won't help you.

Developing your own style, your muscle memory, and personal technique will all be hindered by choosing to trace instead of drawing from observation, so I would encourage against it. Hell - even when tracing is employed as a technique, it's usually by high-skill realism & concept artists who are looking to either cut some corners, save time, or just double-check their own proportions in order to improve further - if you try tracing as a beginner, you will most definitely find the result to still look stiff and "off".

So trust me, there is so much more to be gained from drawing from observation. Make note of tangents, compare proportions, use all the elements of the picture to dictate where and how things should go - it will be a far more rewarding experience.

Hopefully this has been helpful! VaM is a really cheap program (you get it on the guys' patreon for I think 8 dollars, just google it!) and it's definitely been worth my money as an artist since I found it. Learning to use it can be a little intimidating at first glance, but as I said above you only really need a day plus one or two tutorials to get a hang of the interface.

A fair warning though, IT IS A SOFTWARE MADE FOR VIRTUAL SEX/ADULT ANIMATION So when looking it up expect to see a some spicy content.

[stevie-petey]

Had an idea and wanted to pester you about it (I’m kidding, I hope I’m not actually pestering you). What if you were to write a cute snow day blurb for Stug? Set in between S3 and S4? I ask because it’s currently snowing where I’m at and just thought “dang, that’d be so cute.”

you could never pester me i loooove answering blurbs <33 now if i may pester you i changed the timeline to between seasons 2 and 3 because i couldnt resist the idea of pre-dating steve n bug playing in the snow together n being all shy n cutie ugh

enjoy !

"its snowing," steve leans your desk chair back, nearly tipping over completely as he peers out your window. "like. a lot."

theres a mound of assignments on your desk and you only spare a quick glance outside. "oh," your absent minded tone doesnt go unnoticed by steve. "thats nice."

he narrows his eyes. "i thought you loved snow."

"i do," this time more genuineness comes through your voice. you look outside again and ache when you see just how snow has fallen. "but..."

your head tilts down to the work scattered between you and steve. youre insanely behind on calculus assignments and steve has a lab report three weeks overdue and today is the first real day your injuries from demodogs and billy have healed enough to even attempt to understand what a derivative is.

jonathan is stuck at home taking care of will and promised you hed help you with the math as soon as he was able, but now, with all the snow that inevitably will block the roads, you know youre doomed.

steve sees the stress that tenses your spine and an idea pops into his head. he snatches the homework from you and is running out of your room.

"what the-?" but hes already gone, annoyingly fast when he wants to be.

you run after steve, having no other option, really, and find him and dustin rushing to put their coats on.

"shes here!" dustin screeches when he sees you. he shoves at steve, urging him to hurry up, and your mother watches fondly from the kitchen.

you push past your brother. "what is happening?"

steve zips up coat and winks at you, giving no response other than flinging the front door open and chasing dustin through the snow. theyre gone in a heartbeat, giggling like children as they fucking prance through the falling snow.

"id join them if i were you, y/n." your mom says with a slight chuckle. "steve told me to hide your homework until you were 'soaked in snowflakes'."

your jaw drops. "mom-"

"im sorry, sweet girl." she laughs at you now. "blame that handsome boy of yours and go play with your brother outside. itll be good to get some fresh air!"

"but-"

"wear a coat!"

and then your mother shuts her bedroom door, leaving you to watch steve tackle dustin into the snow as they shriek and wrestle in the slippery ground.

"my eye!" steve squeals in pain, rolling around, and dustin giggles menacingly. feeling your eyes on him, steve flings a distressed hand towards you. "y/n, help a guy out here, would ya?"

even though he cant see you, you still roll your eyes at steve. dustin echoes his own sentiments of wanting you to join. the boys plead with you over and over and youre weak to them.

sighing, you grab your heaviest coat. "if either one of you even thinks about tackling me, youre dead."

dustin salutes you. "yes, ma'am."

you help steve up. his hand is cold and his nose red and eyes shining and you cant help but giggle slightly at the sight of him. theres flecks of snow that line his brown hair and hes a delicate kind of pretty that rivals the spiral of snowflakes.

"saved me again, angel." he winks at you again, causing you to blush.

"shut up." you shove at his chest, avoiding his tender eyes. they reveal more to you than you know hes ready to admit.

steve laughs and dustin throws a snowball at your face and everything is warm and soft.

“COME HOME” BLURB MASTERLIST

if you’d like to buy me a coffee ☕︎

[kleftiko]

do you know this cut dating show where they put two people in a box for 12 hours for a blind date? would you be able to write a drabble about hawks x reader in this setting, i just thought it was cute 😩

❦ 12 HOUR DATE

cw: none, this is fluff

okay so i watched an episode and the only thing i can think of is the box being so god damn small 😭 his wings too big for this got dang box

intro—

"hi, im y/n." you nod your head to the camera, knees tucked up to your chest.

"and i’m hawks," he throws up a casual wave and smile, body mimicking your pose so as not to get into each other’s personal space.

not like that was really an option, what with how small the box is. the first thing hawks does is shake your hand, warm and rough palms clasping yours, before the both of you return to your own corners.

"are we ready?" the producer calls, and you two give a simple nod. "any questions?"

"are my feathers allowed to leave the box?" hawks (thankfully) asks, the red wings brushing against you involuntarily.

"uh, yeah, sure, they can do whatever," is the answer. "alright, three, two, one..."

 

hour 1–

"i don’t have any siblings." he answers your question. "id like to think i was the best outcome, though."

you breathe out a laugh. "what’s it like being a hero?"

he makes a face, and you can’t help but genuinely giggle.

"that’s too deep a question," he smiles. "next!"

 

hour 3–

"i wanna—just—like starfish." you say.

"starfish?"

you nod, bent arms lifting to the sides as you attempt to raise a leg, "starfish. it’s so cramped, i need to stretch."

it seems he understands what you’re saying. hawks grabs his jacket and shuffles to the back wall of the box.

"here," he goes, "you take this side, i'll take here; we can stretch out a bit."

it’s not much, but the stretch of your legs as the two of you face each other is a bit relieving. you can even slide your back onto the ground, your legs bending to accommodate. you both attempt to get comfortable, back against the floor and eyes to the ceiling.

"not really a starfish—more like an inchworm." he says this and wiggles his body. you can’t see it, but the foot that nudges you and the sounds he makes erupt a laugh from your throat.

 

hour 5–

you two are nearly shoulder-to-shoulder, legs stretched towards the camera. hawks’ fingers are picking at the fur lining of his jacket, your own coat stuffed to the side.

"what’s your… favourite kind of… kiss?"

you cock your head, taking note of the pink on his cheeks and his lack of eye contact.

"you mean like..." you couldn’t help wanting to tease him. "cookies and cream?"

he snorts loudly, throwing his jacket in your face out of embarrassment as you cackle and catch it.

"shut up! you know what i mean!" to be dramatic even further, he scoots to the other side of the box, ignoring your laughing.

"i don’t think i do," you admit. "how many kinds of kisses are there?"

"at least—like—two."

thinking about it, you don’t notice that you start folding his jacket; it's thick and warm, perfect for the cold wind he probably flies through every day.

"probably standard forehead kisses." you shrug and place his coat beside yours. "what about you?"

he bites the inside of his cheek slightly, not giving you an answer. after a beat, you raise your eyebrows.

"have you never been kissed before?"

 

hour 8–

"my name is keigo, by the way." he whispers.

there’s no need to speak loudly; the two of you are lying side by side, bent legs knocking into each other softly as your heads are using his jacket as a pillow.

"keigo…" you test on your tongue. "that’s nice; i like it."

he chuckles halfheartedly and says, "that’s good; i like your name."

"thanks, i got it for my birthday."

the two of you turn your heads to face each other, the proximity not really bugging either of you anymore. your gaze focuses softly on his eyes, admiring the colour and sleepiness in them from a lack of movement.

you hold up your hand, and he smiles before giving you a high-five.

 

hour 10–

now you’re on your stomachs, your coats used as pillows as you watch outside the box. his feathers are barely visible in the camera, but it can capture your focus as you follow them zoom all around the room. partials of a few bunching together reveal shapes, and keigo’s ramblings about straw houses allow anyone to understand he’s telling the story of the three pigs.

both your faces are filled with content and childlike wonder as you watch the story. arms shift into one another as you point somewhere.

 

hour 12–

heads are resting on each other’s shoulders, exhaustion apparent on both your faces, and your mouths are silent. all four hands are up as you see if either of you can lower just your pinky.

"my left just won't go down." he mumbles, and you let out a half-hearted ‘that’s what she said’.

he flicks your forehead, and you both laugh.

"it’s gonna be weird leaving here now." he admits. "all of a sudden, you won't be here."

"is this stockholm syndrome?" your hands rest on your lap.

he admits, "maybe."

 

outro—

"so, how was it?" the producer asks behind the camera.

keigo has his coat on and his wings spread as he gets to stand once again.

"definitely new," he says. "and weird."

"do you think you’ll see them again?"

he shakes his head with a grin. "hell no—never—they were so—"

"—you can get bubble tea by yourself then!" your voice sounds far away from the camera as keigo laughs.

"wait!" he calls as he disappears from the shot, his voice now drowning out as he chases after you offscreen. "i don’t know where the place we’re going to is!"

[xxchaosjojoxx]

Valentine’s Card (Penguin x f!reader)

A/N: my piece of work for @quinloki valentines event <3

Words: 1486

Valentine’s day was something you really hated. Why do you need a day to express your love for the people who deserved it? However there was something you absolutely loved. Creating Valentine’s Cards with funny quotes. You spent the last two nights creating some origin quotes for your crewmates. It was your first valentine’s day with the heart pirates and you weren’t sure how they would react.

As soon as the sun rose you were up, delivering your valentine’s card.

Ikkaku was the first one who got hers. She was confused after you handed her a light purple card. While her eyes were scanning the words, a laugh escaped her and tears were forming. “‘Are you an octopus? Because you octopi my thoughts.’ Haha what is this?”

You grinned. “Just my appreciation for valentine’s day.” “I absolutely love this. Thank you.”

As time passed you handed over several cards. There were only 4 left. Law, Bepo, Shachi and of course Penguin. The rest of the crew were smiling at you, even Jean Bart’s cheeks were a little red after reading his.

The next ones you found were Bepo and Law and this was kinda scary.

Law’s gaze was stern and unamused as he was observing you.

“I just thought I could give you something to make you smile.”

You said and handed Bepo and Law their cards.

Bepo was smiling and read his card out loud. “‘You are beary special for me.’ Ohh you are so cute and nice y/n. Thank you.” And with that you got a big hug from Bepo.

“Thanks Bepo but you are nearly killing me right now.”

You looked at Law and became nervous. He scoffed a little and you tried to escape his presence. “Well time to go.” - “Wait a damn minute y/n-ya.”

Your captain said a little louder and you yelped while turning your body towards him once more.

“Look captain I just thought it may be a fu-”

“Thanks.” He said and you blinked at him a few times.

“Huh?”

And then you saw it. A rare small smile on his lips.

“I stole your heart, huh?” He smirked and a blush was now on your face and you tried to hide your face. “I just thought it may be funny…”

“I know.” He took a few steps towards you, his index finger was on your chin, forcing you to look up at him. It was the first time your captain was so close to you. And damn was he attractive. “See this as payback.” He said with a low voice as he stepped away from you. “Let’s go Bepo.” he said and both of them left you. Your heart was racing. “God dang it, Captain. I nearly fell in love with you back there.” You mumbled and took a few deep breaths.

It took a while for you to calm down and if there wasn’t already someone who captured your heart, you were pretty sure that you would indeed fall for your captain. Especially with this husky voice of his. “Captain was pretty smooth, huh?” A voice was catching you off guard and there you saw Shachi in the door frame.

“How long did you stand there?”

“A while.” Shachi said and grinned. “So do you have one of these pretty cards for me and Peng as well?” He wiggled his eyebrow and with a scoff you handed him over a card.

“‘You’re a whale of a friend.’” Oh damn please tell me you read those cheeky lines somewhere.

“Nope” You tipped your head. “I used my brain for these masterpieces.”

Shachi leaned an arm over your shoulder. “Last one for your special someone? Or your special penguin?”

Your cheeks grew hot and you pushed him away. “It’s just a coincidence that Penguin is the last one to receive one.”

Shachi was staring at me with an amused look. “Of course darling. He is in our room.”

There you were standing in front of Penguin’s and Shachi shared room. You were nervous. Your hands felt sweaty, your body was trembling. It took a couple of minutes for you to knock on the door. Soon enough a “Come in” was heard and you entered the room quickly and closed the door.

PEnguin was slightly confused seeing you there. He didn’t expect you at all.

“Oh hey Y/N.” He said and was leaving his bed, standing in front of you. “Are you ok? Do you have a fever? Your face is quite red.”

Before his hands could touch your forehead you hugged him. Now it was him who went red and Penguin couldn’t help but stutter. “W-W-What?” He said and wanted to reciprocate your hug but you quickly let go of him, taking a few steps back.

“I’m sorry I don’t have any clue why I did this. Ehmm I have something for you.”

You gave him his card. “I have to go bye.” And then Penguin was alone in his room.

Dumbfounded, blushing and reading his card all over. Again and again.

‘Waddling your way to wish you a happy valentine’s day’ Two penguins were holding hands and a cute little heart was above them, like a mistletoe.

Penguin was happy and couldn’t help but smile all the time. Til the point where he met Shachi and Hakugan. They were talking about something, holding a card in their hands.

“Hey guys. What are you talking about?” He was curious and afraid. He recognized your handwriting.

“We were talking about our cards. Y/N made one for us. Everyone has a different cheeky quote.” Hakugan said excitedly and showed Penguin his card. ‘You’re the catch of the day.’

Penguin felt down and both men in front of him noticed it.

“Are you ok?” He nodded and mumbled. “Yeah I just thought I would be special.”

“What did you say?” Hakugan asked. He was concerned.

“It’s fine.” He said and left the room. Shachi was fast behind him. “What’s wrong bro?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Come on. Something is bugging you.”

“I said, it’s nothing. Stop bickering me.”

Shachi stand still. “Are you jealous or something?”

“I have no reason to be jealous!” Penguin was turning towards his best friend. Screaming at him. He was angry even though his friend did nothing wrong. “Come on Bro.” Shachi said calmly, leading his best friend to the nearest storage room, so both of them could sit on the nearest box.

“You can talk to me dude.”

Penguin was pouting. “I know you said you have no reason to be jealous, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t feel this way.”

“You’re right.” Penguin said. His voice was barely a whisper.

“I thought I was someone special.” He confessed and Shachi patted his shoulder. “You are special to y/n.”

He groaned. “Yeah special like all of you.”

“You are different from us.”

“Yeah sure.” The man with the penguin said with a scoff.

“Stop being a sarcastic ass. She even denied Law. I heard her talking to herself. Stuff like ‘She would fell for him, if there wasn’t someone else who got her heart already’”

Penguin looked up at Shachi, a sad look in his eyes. “She fell for Captain?” He asked.

“DUDE!” Shachi smacked his arm. “Learn to listen! No, she didn’t fall for him. Because there is someone else. She is in love with someone else.”

Penguin was hiding his face under his hat. “Great. Thanks for that.”

“I bet it’s you.”

Penguin couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah sure. Just go and leave me alone.”

“It’s the truth. Why can-!” - “WHY should she love someone like me? Why do think so? I am just a friend to her. Like everyone here. Stop trying to cheer me up.” Penguin stood up and stormed outside the storage room, losing his card in return.

Shachi was taking his card, reading it and couldn’t help but laugh like a maniac. “He’s a confirmed idiot.”

The red hair stood up, leaving the room and could see Penguin’s back.

“Maybe you should read the small print, dumbass!” Shachi screamed and Penguin froze. He was turning towards Shachi slowly. “What?”

Penguin could see the card in the hands of his best friend. “Lost something?” Shachi grinned , taking a few steps towards his best friend, and giving his valentine’s card back to you.

“Learn to read properly.” With that he left.

And Penguin read it again. His best friend was right. He was an idiot. With fast steps he was running through the Polar Tang, searching for you. As soon as he saw you, he hugged you. “The answer is Yes. Always and forever.”

‘When Penguins find their mate, they stay together forever. Wanna be my Penguin?’

[livelaughlovekny]

You apply ointment on his hands

Notes: Original AU, Gender neutral reader , 2nd person POV,

Summary: Before the war, the both of you fall into a routine where you apply ointment on his hands.

a/n: oh dang its been a while guys. this is really short btw !!

  He was most definitely indulging you. Which demon slayer has not had their fair share of blisters and skin rubbed raw from training? As Hashiras, it is absolutely not a surprise that you have all gotten to used to the pain. In fact, your hands were probably roughed up and used to it. Only idiots who had too much free time would even attempt to heal the wounds on their hands. Muichirou was, without a doubt, not of one them. Yet, he never objects when you would unscrew the cap of a small bottle of ointment and gesture for him to hold out his hands after a long day of training.

  Maybe it came as a surprise to you the first time he obliged without any hesitation, but really, deep in both of your hearts, you both knew that this was just the calm before the storm – every act of affection that could be shown is a luxury. He never expresses his longing and love outright, though he has been more open ever since he came back from the blacksmiths, but neither did you. Perhaps it was because saying those three little words aloud would be your breaking points, the one thing that could prevent the both of you from joining the war. It’s really unfair but at least you are the given the chance to have these little peaceful moments where the only thing that mattered was him and you.

  With one hand gently holding one of his, you dig lightly into the oil with your other. Gently running your finger across the rough surface of his calloused hands, you hum a little. You trace the lines on his palm and draw little circles on it, noting for the nth time how he’s not ticklish at all.

  Muichirou watched you intently, his focus on you and only you. He watched as you determinedly but gently apply the ointment onto his hands, the way your brows furrowed ever so slightly, as if the rough edges of his palm frustrated you. He thinks that it does. He can guess why but doesn’t allow himself to think too deeply into it. After all, you too had the same rough edges and blisters on your palms but you didn’t seem to care about that. He notes with mild irritation at himself for not offering to care for your hands too. It’s unfortunate, but he realises that he’s too embarrassed to do the same. One day, he promises to himself as he continues watching you.

  His left palm glistens a little from the oil but it’s a while before you switch to his other hand. Repeating the same procedure, you slowly apply the oil onto his right palm. Despite knowing how he was un-ticklish and numbed to small pains such as these, you still took great care in rubbing the ointment into his palm. You enjoyed this feeling. This feeling you get when you are able to care for him. It’s a warm and fulfilling one. When you are done, you slowly let go of his hand, seemingly reluctant to do so. To your surprise, Muichirou grabs and entwines your fingers together. A new kind of silence falls over you two.

  The both of you stay in the state for a while. The oily sensation from the ointment on his hands wasn’t pleasant but neither of you minded. Holding his hand, you could feel how calloused his hands were and briefly wondered, if maybe, somehow, in another world, he would have the smoothest and prettiest hands you had ever seen. Hands that proved that he had never had to suffer through the ordeals he did in this one. In that moment, you wondered how much you would like to see him with smooth hands and if that was why you had even bothered to start this routine.

a/n: so it turns out i can still write, albeit terribly, when I'm avoiding work !!

[sepublic]

My hot take is that Pilot Gus has been a thing since the pitch bible, it’s just that he’s the character who’s gone through the most revisions in terms of aesthetic;

He’s Tibbles. Or Tibbles was him. They’re small nerdy friends of Luz who stand out as having an interest in human realm stuff. One of the pitched episode concepts was Tibbles and Eda attempting to throw Luz a human party only for their misunderstanding of human culture to lead to chaos, which is perfectly in line with canon Gus clearly not knowing what he’s talking about but meaning it in full earnest. Tibbles and Paulina AKA Pilot Willow are even on the same page together, and Willow and Gus are a classic duo.

After all, look at Hunter! William is a very different character, with a different name and appearance, different personality/vibes, and a different backstory. Yet there are a lot of recurring elements between both versions of the character that you can’t deny Hunter is William after having gone through multiple revisions.

In the end, it’s clear that the writers took the character of Tibbles and just made him a “human” kid, and then expanded on his character from there. It’s possible they just came to this conclusion on their own. It could be a result of Disney pushing the Hexside angle, so the writers converted Tibbles into another peer for Luz, rather than making a new character. Him being a witch student also allowed the writers to expand on one of the nine coven magics as well! And I wouldn’t be surprised if executives pushed for the revised Tibbles to look human for relatability.

But the writers were obviously attached to the concept of a porcine demon named Tibbles, so they retained him but with a radically different personality to fulfill a separate niche of minor antagonist they’d drafted for some other episodes. Even in canon, Tibbles still retains a connection to human artifacts, albeit much more incidental to his character and out of utilitarian, economic interests; He scavenged human trash and briefly sold The Good Witch Azura books, only to give up once Amity proved to be the only buyer. Which hilariously makes Tibbles a contributor towards Lumity.

Dang I want to imagine a plot where Gus and Tibbles interact directly (amidst a salty exchange acknowledging Tibbles’ attempted revenge on Gus in Really Small Problems) and the show gets really meta about how they’re two halves of the same character, albeit with Gus clearly being the more “whole” of the two. It’s a story that works without the BTS knowledge but with it, it makes the whole bit feel enriched.

Obviously it’d be a plot about the Gus and Tibbles having similarities in their shared connection to human garbage, and maybe their respective dynamics with Eda. Possibly discussing/exploring the motives for their interest, which could get into Gus’ motives and how he fell in love with human culture. In fact if Eda wasn’t necessarily the source of Gus’ first exposure, it could’ve damn well been Tibbles!

And since it’s Tibbles, Gus doesn’t really bond with him (esp if like Amity, Gus got it from Tibbles indirectly) and that’s why he’s fairly lonely by the time S1 rolls around, and he’s more impressed by Eda instead. It explains how Gus knows about human stuff, but doesn’t have a particular connection to Eda until they interact through Luz. Tibbles and Eda have a minor rivalry going along as black market potions sellers who have human garbage as a side gig, so it feels appropriate.

As does Tibbles also having a connection with Mattholomule over this human garbage they’re intentionally misrepresenting, which… Jeez, does this provide a backdrop to Mattholomule usurping the HAS with fake human artifacts???? Huh. I guess Tibbles is a contributor to Gustholomule as well. He’s surprisingly connected but I guess that makes sense when this guy was supposed to be a lot more involved before Gus took his place, or rather Tibbles became Gus. It’s weird.

What’d really sell the connection is Gus having a pig palisman, but a chameleon is more relevant when it comes to the final canon. And what’d make things insane is if Gus and Tibbles look at their family trees and realize they stem from a common ancestor, the implicit Tibbles the First, as Tibbles being the Third indicates. Tibblet-Tibblie Grimm Hammer I looks just like the pitch bible… All of this could be the basis for Tibbles to turn around and explain why he was invited to Luz’s Quincenera years later.

[purpdrawsthings]

"I used to look so happy, always jittering around, curious."

"... I was so naive and gullible back then... "

Gosh dang chat the Puzzles angst is real 😔💥

Ngl, if I'm being honest, if feel meh about the finished result =[

The lines on Puzzles looks a bit too thick, and I'm kinda not satisfied with how I drew kid Puzzles. And the shading on Puzzles wasn't really how I imagined it 😭 Though I am satisfied with the holographic look I did.

Overall, not really one of my favs but still decent anyways 💥

Anywaysssss enough with the honest and negative thoughts, I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH GUHHHHHHHHHHH

THE IDEA OF A SANS AU IS GENIUS AND I COULDN'T IMAGINE HOW WELL IT EVEN FIT WITH THE CAST AND EVERYTHING!!! I MEAN- I HAVEN'T WENT IN THE UNDERTALE FANDOM BEFORE BUT I DO KNOW SOME OF THE SANS'S! Gosh I am always flabbergasted on how people get such amazing ideas 😔

ESPECIALLY YOU @michealscorneroftheinternet !!!! I FIRST SAW YOU THROUGH YOUR AMAZING SMG3 AND PUZZLES AU!! I LOVE THE STORY SO MUCH, ITS SO WELL PUT TOGETHER AHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥💥

I CAN BELIEVE YOU'RE BOTH AN ARTIST AND A PERSON WHO CAN USE GMOD! GOSH DANG THAT'S TALENT.

Meanwhile the only materials I have are just a phone and finger 😭

This fandom has got so many amazing talented ppl, makes me go bonkers how I've known some amazing popular ppl omg 😔😔😔

Okay I think that's enough fangirling 😭

I hope they enjoy this art piece that I managed to finish =']

Yeetus chat =3

NOTE :

OK WHAT I DIDN'T LOOK AT THE UPDATED POSTS FROM MICHEAL AND I THINK THIS IS REALLY NOT ACCURATE FROM THE LORE AHHHHHHHHHHHSWISHOSBDLSNDKDJDKD

I HAVE VERY LOW KNOWLEDGE ABOUT THE SANS AU AJSHOAHSOSHSOSHS 😭😭😭

Worries too much about inaccuracy

[missheavenfield1215]

Xeni & Paula Human Version + mini headcanons Part 2

This is a sketch of Paula, a little more "realistic"... Because in the series they make us understand that she already has much more experience than Xeni, so she rejects all the ideas that he wants to share. Perhaps, Paula is in her early 40's

Here's one more sketch of Xeni annoying Paula, perhaps reminding her that she's much smaller. Or by reminding him that his aunt is the CEO... Her Boss.

I know I already made a drawing of Paula with the original concept and making her look older... But I still love the idea of ​​her being just a couple of years older than Xeni, that he still knows it and that he still teases her anyway and even harder...

(I had already published this drawing, but it was not painted in its entirety)

(hell, only I could make Xeni's ugly sweater even uglier)

This is another sketch of Paula

And here are my personal favorites...

Here, Paula asked him for a photo without the glasses, (because they were going to move or something)

And he's like: Ugh, whatever...😒

And I swear the latter didn't look so bad... I swear it's because of the angle of my camera... 🥺

And here I tried to make a comic based on my Headcanon that I made in my first post.

That Headcanon said that Xeni was a fervent admirer of Paula when he was very young... And that over time, he decided to stop admiring her because her work declined.

And after having carved out a career based on his cold and distant character to what is not risky or "Indie". In addition to having a reputation for being contemptuous of what is popular, generic and what is not unique... Even of being much rougher with Paula, (casually, the only director who still has that fame).

Therefore, it is terrible that "someone" would have shouted what he did not want to confess.

He STILL LOVES Paula's work... And even though years have passed it will still be his guilty taste...

And even though he always tries to deny it or hide it, he will still be a fan of the way Paula manages to express so many emotions in such a short time... It's like his sugar shot... It could be bad if consumed in excess, but under normal circumstances, it releases the perfect dose of dopamine.

My Headcanon of this post is: Xeni is the kind of friend who will let you know if you are wrong about something, he will correct you (many times with the intention of annoying you), sometimes he will appropriate your personal space, if he scolds you often it is because he is worried about you, the line that separates YOUR THINGS from HIS, it DOESN'T exist... He will take away your sweets, coffes or desserts, just because he wants... Anyway, it's not that he minds bothering you about everything.

And Paula's Headcanon is that she would be the kind of friend who will almost be your caregiver and almost a second mother. She doesn't usually get upset that often, but when she does, she'll act on impulse... She's the one carrying candy, wipes, and paper in case anyone needs them... She's going to comfort you until you stop crying, she's going to hug you and tell you that everything will be okay.

*And here's a little sketch of Xeni's embarrassed face, realizing that everyone on the set, heard that cofession...*

Well, this is all sketches I have of these two because, I love them and I want them to be happily ever after and things like that... 🥰

Dang it!! I think I ship them ❤️❤️

Here is the first part

[bright-hope-spot-19]

No way, I just saw a post by a Sasusaku fan trying to justify the ship by bringing canon proof from the manga to counter the arguments mainly used to discredit the ship. I decided to give it a go, see what points they offered, and well.

First things first: I'm not here to make fun of anyone. I don't like hurting anyone's feelings, I can't be comfortable knowing I've hurt someone's feelings. This is the reason I'm not gonna provide a link to said post cause I don't want that person to be harassed or receive hate from Antis for trying to defend their fave ship. That person likes SS they attempted to provide proof of it, and I can respect that! However, I'm also very honest: and most of that 'canon proof' didn't actually prove anything. So here I am, also to disprove the main excuses employed in that one SS defense post.

The first claim they tried to prove is that Sakura does actually know and understand Sasuke, and she cares about him.

The proof provided were the scenes of her in the forest of death and after noticing Sasuke's discomfort from the curse mark, bringing it up to him, asking him to withdraw from the exam, and warning that she'd inform the sensei in charge if he didn't give himself a break. All right. While these scenes do show Sakura being caring towards him, which is good! They don't show her knowing him or understanding him in any way. The only reason she was more observant towards his discomfort is because she was the only other person there when Orochimaru appeared to them. Naruto was absent from the scene cause he'd been swallowed by a giant snake, and he was stuck inside it for a while until he figured out to use the Shadow Clone jutsu to explode that snake and free himself. Sakura was the only witness to Orochimaru's and Sasuke's fight and how Sasuke was marked (cause, obviously, she just sat on a branch and did nothing). So, it makes sense that literally being the only person in the know, she'd notice it and ask him about it.

If her and Naruto's roles were switched and she was the one separated from the guys for whatever reason, not being there to witness the placing of the curse mark, I'm sure she wouldn't make any comments about it later, or notice Sasuke's strange behavior. This argument is further foiled cause once Naruto's free and goes back to them and Orochimaru, he starts taunting Sasuke for being scared or whatever, and Sakura sides with Naruto! She specifically has a line telling Sasuke that not even Naruto would be this scared or whatever (rn I don't remember her exact lines, but she does berate Sasuke for not wanting to fight Oro? Cause he was the only one who wanted to escape cause he knew they didn't stand a chance). If she really cared for Sasuke, wouldn't it have made more sense for her to side with Sasuke's idea of trying to escape from Orochimaru instead of siding with Naruto's dumbass, idiotic words about Sasuke being a scaredy cat? Do SS fans know it's mainly Naruto's and Sakura's faults that Sasuke got that mark in the 1st place cause they're the ones who both berated him for not wanting to fight? Bunch of clowns, Istg.

The second claim in that SS defense post was that Sasuke noticed Sakura acting weird before they entered for the chunin exams and tried to cheer her up so she wouldn't feel sad, so he does care bout her!

All right, the scene being referenced in this instance is the one before they presented themselves for the written test, where Sasuke's staring at Sakura and thinking to himself that somethings wrong with her. Well, I'm sorry to inform you that Sakura wasn't precisely keeping it a secret either. She was making very obvious sad, nervous expressions of hopelessness, so it makes sense that Sask noticed. He was doing it all to be a good friend. Besides, Sasuke is very smart and observant. He already knows Sakura is the weakest link of the team and, as such, the one who needs the most watching out for. He notices her sad feelings because: 1- it was pretty dang obvious to anyone seeing her. 2- Sasuke is a very caring person deep down. Not just to Sakura but in general. 3- He's very smart and observant and noticed her apathy cause he was probably expecting it and saw it coming cause as I've said: she is the weakest link, and Sasuke knows it.

Same with him trying to cheer her up by mentioning the floor genjutsu: it doesn't mean he has any special feelings for her specifically. We all know Sask most likely noticed it way before Sakura. He just let her get that win before the exam cause 1- as I've said before, he's a nice person who cares about the people close to him in general. 2- he urgently needed her to stop mopping and get her head back in the game so her emotions wouldn't negatively impact the team's overall performance in the exam. Being the smart cookie he is, Sasuke also knew that if no one cheered her up and she went into the exams still sad, that could affect her negatively into performing badly and he can't allow for her to have a bad performance cause it could potentially also affect him. Above all, Sasuke sees the chunin exams as another chance to get stronger so he can enact his revenge against Itachi. To him, it's just getting a step closer to his goals. That's why he can't let Sakura be sad cause her sadness could've potentially ruined the whole exams for them. He shows it again with Naruto not knowing how to get the test answers and feeling Sasuke's and Sakura's menacing stares on his back. It's very clear that Sasuke doesn't want any of them to mess up, and for that, he needs for them to be at full mental capacity.

Another argument brought forward is that Sasuke also noticed when Sakura was lying to Naruto about her cut hair in the forest of death, after the fight vs. The sound team.

I mean, I don't know what to say to this. The scene is clearly shown in a way that makes it clear that everyone present there can tell she's lying, with the exception of Naruto cause he's that dense, I suppose. Sasuke noticing she'd cut her hair and that she lied to Nart about it to not worry him doesn't mean shit. He doesn't care if Saku cuts her hair or not. He literally also asks her no questions about it or checks on her injuries, despite knowing she'd had to fight alone for a while, before Lee and Ino-Shika-Cho showed up. Lee, Naruto, and Ino were the only 3 people present there to show any real, genuine concern for Sakura's well-being. Sasuke himself? Not at all. It would've made more sense for the ship if he was given at least a panel worrying about her or checking her injuries, but nope. That doesn't happen.

Another excuse frequently brought forward and that could be used as an argument for my words above about Sask not caring is how when Sasuke awoke from his unconscious state and saw that Sakura was injured he was so furious and overtaken by his curse mark that he asked her who did that to her and then proceeded to break Zaku's arms for it.

Now, this can very well serve as real proof that Sasuke does genuinely care and show concern for Sakura! And you know what? For once, I agree! Sasuke showed great concern for her in that scene. However, that concern was purely platonic. Besides, we shouldn't forget he was under the influence of the cm powering his negative feelings and making him lash out. When he broke the guy's arms, it was presented as a horrid "wtf" moment that was out of the ordinary cause regular Sasuke under regular circumstances would've never done that. The main point of the scene and Sasuke's whole violent outbreak was to 1- show the effect of the cm. 2- serve as foreshadowing for what would happen in later arcs (Sasuke deserting the village for Oros' offer of power). His concern for Sakura came as a byproduct, a result of these 2 main factors. Again, it is also cause he's just naturally a very kind, caring person. His emotions were out of control then because of an external factor, so it can't be taken as genuine when Sasuke wasn't really in control of his emotions there.

Another one of their arguments is when Nart and Sask are facing a Gaara who's slowly transforming into Shukaku. After Gaara had pinned Saku to a tree, Sask asked Naruto to save Sakura at all costs and run cause he wanted to personally face Gaara.

Once again, Sasuke is shown as caring. He sees Sakura in danger and is concerned with her safety and wanting to face the aggressor. The detail that's ignored more often than not is the fact that he also shows concern for Naruto. He wanted both of them to escape and leave Gaara to him. He does it cause he cares about both of them. The reason he also insists on facing Gaara alone is not just for Sakura but because he genuinely believed he was the only one strong enough to do it. He didn't think Naruto could do it, so once again, he was willing to risk himself for both his teammates cause he's that kind and selfless. Idk why SS fans act so surprised every time Sask shows care and concern, and they immediately attribute Sakura as the only source of those feelings. The only one who can make Sask feel that way cause he's normally distant and brooding and emotionless when that's not true. Sasuke's always been a good person. Every time he's shown caring and protecting, he's not just doing it for Sakura, but for Naruto's sake just as much. The reason he just seems to care for her more is just cause she couldn't defend herself back then, so she needed extra attention, not because of any budding romantic feelings. Sask knows that, unlike Sakura, Naruto can fight, and he still cares bout him, too. During Naruto's fight vs. Gaara, there's a scene where the blond is thrown by Gaara and Sasuke's body reacts on its own despite barely being able to move, throwing himself in the way just to cushion Naruto's hit against the tree, so he ends up impacting with Sasuke. If that's not true love, idk what is.

Other arguments brought up were all concerning Boruto and the Sasuke Retsuden manga, which isn't canon, so I won't discuss them here. It was stuff about a character named Jiji touching Sakura's hair and Sask feeling jealous, and him telling Sarada that she's a result of their love or whatever? Fam, your argument loses all weight and credibility the moment you decide to bring that Sasuke Retsu-trash into the discussion. The comic itself was written by another SS fan who knows little to nothing bout the og work, and the author herself has a tweet confirming her story is not canon.

Anyways, this is all I've got for now. Yeah, Sasuke definitely cares, or used to care bout Sakura, I won't deny that. Those feelings, tho, are purely platonic, stemming from a heavily traumatized survivor of genocide who doesn't want to lose any more of his friends and hates to see them suffer cause he knows what it feels like. It's all because Sasuke is naturally kind and caring, and he hates inflicting violence on the innocent. Not even on people who do deserve it, in fact. Of course, SS fans have to make it all about Sakura every time Sask shows any smidgen of concern or care, believing her to be the only reason he shows those feelings, that he doesn't feel for anyone else. That Sakura, and only Sakura, brings those emotions out of him. When the truth is, he has way more scenes caring for Nart than her (their fight against Haku?) All while ignoring the bigger things and factors at play that may influence Sasuke's emotions (such as the cm), the main goal fueling him (killing Itachi to avenge his clan), and that in his mental state Sasuke really wasn't open for romances (he says so, on multiple occasions. But why would Sakura fans care about Sasuke's mental health, amirite?) Period.