#I need to put them Somewhere
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keep seeing shit about the new ts album & mental illness and i am so so tired. please be nice to actually "crazy" people if ur gonna use us for the aesthetic. i'm not schizophrenic cause it's cute. don't joke about asylums if u haven't had those experiences (and even some of y'all who have been treat it like a vacation & to the rest of us it's prison. i mean literally. prison. incarceration. that's not new shit. and yeah, i'm that "actually crazy" person screaming in the ward. ur not any better than me.)
idk i keep posting and deleting about this cause i can't get my thoughts out properly i just. i'm tired. there was already a worsening problem of "socially acceptable" mental illness pushing out the rest of us (as it's always been) and now there's the top artist in the united states calling herself crazy, saying you should be scared of her, she was raised in an asylum, etc. and it's like.... that's my lived experience. medical doctors refuse to treat me because they're scared of my psychiatric disorders. i've had the cops called on me for episodes. i spent a decade rotting in the mental health system & institutions and i only got out after years of planning how to get away. and so much more i cant even put into words.
and now not only are y'all using folk like me & our experiences for the aesthetic. you're not even a decent human being to those of us who have actually lived through this shit. idk man. really rubs me the wrong way.
#idk if this makes any sense my brain is spaghetti this morning but i'm just frustrated and need to put it somewhere#and i still keep thinking about that tiktok where that girl films another psych patient without their consent#and everyone is making fun of them for being crazy in the comments#and it's just like????? what the fuck. and i keep encountering people like that. who are just absolute shitheads#even if they claim to understand my experiences#idk man#fuck#actually schizophrenic#actually mentally ill
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pretty janky gif but I wanted to compare my simon design to my ice king design. behold! old person
#adventure time#simon petrikov#ice king#gif#adventure time fanart#artists on tumblr#character design#my version of ice king does wear glasses. but he doesn't need them#in canon his glasses are missing to indicate a loss of Self. right.#with simon putting on his glasses showing that he's regained his sense of self#HOWEVER!!! I'm also very fond of the idea that he IS still in there somewhere. with the glasses representing that#GET HIM BROWN CONTACTS NNOOWWWW!!!!!!#I have ANOTHER version of simon where he has one eye that's still blue. same side as his white hair#but that's not super canonical considering golb returned him to his ORIGINAL original state#the glasses don't look great here I'm aware!!
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Oh. Oh.
Siffrin isn't just missing the trap switch or keys because they suck at their assigned job. He doesn't. Or at least- didn't.
They miss them because they only have one eye now. Siffrin has bad depth perception. He can't tell if a space in a drawer or book is a bit bigger than it's supposed to be. They can't tell if something is sitting oddly-
He keeps hitting that one table, because he clearly hasn't adjusted to the new depth perception. It's not their fault.
It was never their fault.
#they really tricked all of us when they thought “wow im really blinding bad at this” didnt they#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#siffrin isat#in stars and time siffrin#siffrin in stars and time#this is my new hc at least#i dont know that its been confirmed anywhere but#it just makes sm sense#ofc its them adjusting to their eye#and ofc hed blame himself for it#of course#i might go cry for a bit#and i needed to put this somewhere so i can remember it for later#ty for listening void#isat hc#isat headcanon#yellow's meta
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to all of my dolls finding themselves:
originality is the "aesthetic" you are looking for. individuality is the "it factor" you are looking for. from your personality, pieces, hair, cadence of voice...even down to your favorite foods or special interests. you aren't supposed to change every aspect about yourself to be more palatable for everyone you meet. that actually makes you BORING!!!
"but so and so is doing this" "but what if people don't like it" ... so??? don't take people disliking your aesthetic as a sign that you need to do something different. like, of course they don't like it or have second thoughts - it's because THEY wouldn't do it themselves because it wouldn't go with THEIR given aesthetic. HELLOO??????
unless they are like minded, stop asking other people to weigh in on the things you CLEARLY like about yourself. especially if it's a core personality trait or interest. your LIFE isn't a group project. your LIFE is not a co-op game.
and yes... people will try to force you to assimilate and follow the crowd by speaking misfortune on your rebrand, your expression, your hobbies, your chosen path out of jealousy. however, that jealousy is lowkey unspoken respect for the fact you have the candor to go against homogeneity.
your authentic dedication to everything that makes you YOU is what will bring you the illustrious life you so fervently seek in the end...not some book a celebrity wrote or a youtube video. it's in YOUR DNA to be a star already in anything you want to do.
there isn't one tutorial on this world wide web that will help you if you don't realize you have the components within you first. there is NOTHING wrong with you!!! you are EVERYTHING that is right already!!!
NEVER conform to the way they think you should shine.
#thoughts#i cant stand seeing a pack mentality i hate seeing ppl shy out of who they are esp neurodivergents#while it is to be expected and is a result of our age group as well as cultural factors especially collectivism#i cannot help but reiterate how harmful it is for everyone to move as if they are the SAME PERSON! you are not so and so and they are not u#yall both just have the same hair or skin or smth you are still YOU hello#inspo is everything and dreams are a foundation BUT make it ur oWN#we all gotta start somewhere but golly gee! PUT THAT STUFF TO REST!#the obsession everyone has with humbling someone who is being themselves is old and tired! KEEP GOING I BELIEVE IN U DONT LISTEN TO THEM.#words i needed to hear when i was younger#ok rant over
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mmm thoughts of private executioner!blade, who is high priestess!kafka's bodyguard. well, more like her guard dog, as many fearfully seem to think.
he is aloof and gruff and rough around the edges, his name capturing it perfectly. when in the eyes of the public he either keeps to himself or stands ready by kafka's side, but when out he lurks in the shadows ready and waiting to carry out her death orders.
you, yourself, haven't had very many pleasant encounters with him... if you can even call them that. that being said, you haven't had many pleasant encounters with anyone. notorious for your... less than pleasant disposition, for a lack of better words, you have more people who'd rather see you run through than those you can call a friend.
in a dog-eat-dog world, you had no choice but to protect yourself. that, however, ultimately became your demise.
"oh? so you're the one sent to kill me. can't say i'm all that surprised."
standing before you is the feared executioner. his sword is tucked inside the sheath attached to his hip, that ever-present dark swirl of an aura stifling the air. he doesn't say anything, instead opting to silently stare down at your slumped and worn-out form. you find that his gaze doesn't bother you; rather, it's oddly comforting knowing someone will see you in your last moments.
"i've never asked you for a favour before, so this will be my first and last request for you." in all honesty, you're not sure where this chattiness stems from. considering you're currently in a holding cell under the crime of attempted murder towards kafka (a poisoned wine you were most definitely framed for, though you can't say you were surprised) and are awaiting for your turn to be under the guillotine for your public execution, you probably should be a little desperate towards the private executioner in front of you.
and yet, your mind is nothing if not peaceful.
with a huff, you relay your request, "can you make sure it's quick? painless, preferably, but i'd rather you just get it over and done with."
silence blankets the cold chambers. moisture accumulated along the cobble ceiling drip in a steady rhythm, like a clock ticking away the seconds. it's unnerving, almost, how there is not a single sound other than your impending countdown.
"why?" comes his low mutter, effectively causing a ripple within the stagnant air. you almost think you misheard him, but his following words cease the thought, "why won't you ask me for help?"
had it not been for the abrupt shuffle and clanging against the metal bars, you would have never looked up to see him in your last moments.
his scarred hands gripping the metal until his knuckles turn a ghastly white and blood dripping from his palms is what greets your sight. as your gaze slowly trails up, you almost let loose a laugh of disbelief; who would have thought blade, the infamous guard dog of the high priestess, could make such a desperate expression? one looking as though his whole world crumbled before him, in which he can do nothing but sit and watch.
(you will never know of the anger and desperation which coursed through his veins the moment he heard of your predicament. had it been anyone else, he wouldn't have cared. but you're not anyone else; you're you — unapologetically, wholeheartedly. it didn't take him long to hunt down those behind it, cutting them down without thought and putting an end to their miserable lives. he rushed as soon as he could when kafka gave him the order, no thoughts other than you, you, you, occupying his mind.
you will never know of the anguish which overcame him when he found you in such a state, your once healthy complexion and defiant gaze reduced to nothing but a tiredness which had always sat quietly behind your disposition. he's almost positive the muscle which unwillingly keeps him alive tore at the seams from your request, the acceptance in which you displayed causing his mind to go astray. even as he damn-near begs you to rely on him for help — to run away with him to some place no one knows of you and start anew there — you merely smile, resigned and peaceful.
you will never know of how much blade is willing to put on the line for you, for you never made it to see the complete and utter carnage he wrecked in your name.)
#what was initially a teehee shower thought became an ueue scenario#this was going somewhere and and then it got longer and longer and then took a severely angsty turn wtf#originally was going to keep this on the blog but then i cried at the end and decided it had to be let free <//3#im sorry blade i love u i really do but that just means i need to put u through the emotional wringer haha... ha... a....#oh and also blade is kafkas bodyguard bc she promised to help find a way to cure him of his curse#(<- the mara/immortality equivalent wow we love unneeded lore !)#and yeah. this is me saying i have too many ideas and aus and idk what to do with myself so im blurting them out here#this is yet another cry for help 🥹#sophie talks : concepts <3#blade x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#blade x you#honkai star rail x you#hsr x you#honkai star rail imagines#hsr imagines
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ichor, and the fated end
#pokemon#arceus#giratina#poke mythos#eyestrain#giratina wounded arceus badly before it was put away#palkia and dialga were forced to give arceus an ultimatum: either giratina was killed. or it was sent away somewhere untouchable#this was not given in a cruel manner or as pure merciless logistics#giratina was something to them too. a sibling they watched grow. but they knew not anything else that could be done#the choice that was made spared them all something#anwyays. ehem. back on this. this ones pretty edgy folks#idk does this need like. a cw tag. its pretty stylized+idk what to even use. just lmk i guess
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Eliot in glasses compendium.
(Jake)
(Alex)
#leverage#leverage redemption#eliot spencer#christian kane#this guy in glasses#yes please#the detail that he originally wore them because he needed them got lost along the way#somewhere after the new glasses line from jailhouse job#although he did wear them again for reading purposes once in redemption#i mean canonically he probably wears contacts#cause getting punched wearing glasses sucks#but also consider that this is the reason why he's always scowling in redemption#he's not grumpy he's squinting#because he's too stubborn to go and put his glasses on#yeah he needs to wear them more in redemption#tag essay#long post#ghostly'sgifs
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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Are you sure? This jelly fish sting is very painful!
#the sign the series#the sign#phayatharn#babe tanatat#billy patchanon#mygifs#thesigngifs#me procrastinating rewatching not me episode 1 and waiting for bake me please made me finally gif something in my stupid style again#BUT LOOK AT THEM#i HAD to#now all i need is to make a cute jelly fish and put it somewhere
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an ode to intimacy.
#yeah I’ve had hozier on loop the past few days I have the brainworms#it made me have Thoughts and I needed to put them Somewhere#overall really like how the color palette and aesthetic turned out <33#traditional art#artists on tumblr#discworld#monstrous regiment#polly perks#maladict#yep that’s who those two sharing a cig are#skeleton aesthetic#aesthetic art#yellow#yellow aesthetic#intimacy#queer art#lgbtq#angel wings#starry eyed
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HOLY. SHIT.
I don’t even wanna separate these?? TAKE THE WHOLE SHEET I’M SO PROUD OF IT WHAT????
I was playing around with expressions and OMG, I think I unlocked something???
It was mostly from yesterday’s post, I liked the way I drew Pizza Head so I decided to try drawing him again (since it’s been a while) AND GOD I LOVE THESE‼️‼️‼️ Seriously started out rough but then I just kind rolled with it! I like it! I like it a lot‼️ 😆😆
Also since I drew Brick yesterday as well, I decided to change the way I draw him, just a bit 🤏
Today was so fun AAAHHH!!!! 💞💞💞💞💞💞
#Pizza Tower#Looking at these so proud 😌😌#I was on the coach for what- 3 hours? It was worth it- 💀#I think the way I’ll draw Brick for now on is what he looks like in game but the legs look just a TINY bit like baggy pants#Like have you ever seen animated animals have those legs that look baggy and the feet underneath#I’ve seen it somewhere I know I have but I don’t have a good example…Still I tried to make it look sorta like that-#And I like it! I think he’s looks adorable!! 😄😄💕💕#For Pizza Head I wanted to give more life in his expressions and poses#I think I did it well enough before hand but I want to express MORE of it#Like the better parts of it- Him looking smug him looking angry him looking annoyed etc#I like the one I colored and the one where he’s singing to himself- THAT one I had fun with he looks great 😂#I also like the one where he’s doing a raspberry#I did that one without a sketch!!#I’m basically trying to focus more on the expressions I think. I had the most fun with them and that’s the thing that made me realize I#need to put more life into him. He needs to be flexible#Sorry if I rambled to much- 😅 Just spilling my ideas. Hope you don’t mind 😂#Doodles#Pizza Head#Brick#Gustavo#Gustavo and Brick
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BOY WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT NEW CHAPTER........
#erm spoliers so im gonna put a divider......................................................................................................#............................................................................................................................................#just what is fyodor's ability......to transfer hosts?#or like resurrection? it would make sense due to the religious symbolism and also his last words that emantated christ's before he died#eerie how his execution in the past was so similar to how he was killed in the helicopter by fazai#i think nikolai has a bigger part to play in all of this than we think he does. i feel he likely switched out fyodors body w the dummy#the flash of the explosion could have easily covered up his ability without chuuya and dazai noticing#also this means fyodor is likely loose in the prison somewhere since nikolais ability only lets him spatially splice up to 100 meters#and the heliport is the only way out?? so theyll have to confront each other on the roof#pls i need skk to get out of there rn im so scared for them#bungou stray dogs
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You ever think about the aaic poster having the goddess of justice in the middle behind edgeworth separating a prosecutor’s badge with red lighting (normal prosecutor’s badge colour) on the left and a prosecutor’s badge with golden lighting (normal attorney’s badge colour) on the left symbolising his search for how he wants to fight for justice in aai2 and how Gregory and von karma are each facing the side of their ideals while being on Edgeworth’s shoulders like a devil and angel. Because i do
#ace attorney#miles edgeworth#aai#aai2#does this need a spoiler tag ?? I just talk about Edgeworth’s main conflict of the game#aai collection#general my post tag#funny implications about the kaijus and de killer /joke#also I’m reaching there but there’s something about how the steel samurai is on the attorney side#and the kaijus that global studios decided to focus on are on the prosecutor side#something something if you go with the “the steel samurai obsession comes from his childhood” thing from the anime then it’s something about#his ideals and ambitions from his childhood vs how they changed after everything#but realistically they just wanted to put them somewhere on the poster bc they’re cool and thought sure in the back#and epic monsters fighting fits better with red than yellow#and a cool samurai silhouette fits nicely with gold
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I'm beginning to realise that a major reason why I woke up in the middle of August and was like "I REALLY DESPERATELY URGENTLY FINALLY NEED TO DRIVE AROUND ICELAND FOR TWO WEEKS ON MY OWN" (apart from, you know, seeing Iceland) is that this will be the first time since Ireland that I will completely on my own schedule and on my own and off to clock and not available and it's really interesting that the people in my life who are the most like 'why would you want to go to Iceland on your own, there's nothing there, that sounds boring, it's empty and cold' are the ones I most need a break from. It's you, the stressor is you.
#I feel like my most recent Berlin holiday might have been the breaking point to put me off of group holidays and city trips#and the friends (i love them bless their heart) who made that trip such a chore are exactly the same ones who're like#'but that sounds boring why don't you want to go somewhere warm with us :(('#I'm sorry I need to go somewhere where I can park somewhere on a whim and wander where I want at a moment's notice#without explaining#I need to walk for ages and not see a house or a street or a neighbour#I need to pick a destination without negotiating its convenience#and most importantly i need the ocean
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hello... please consider... yakumo in:
the classic traditional style qipaos
the modernised and modified ones
bonus: modified hanfu
he would look wonderful wouldn't he? all the more delectable and sashimiable?
ahaha...ahah...AHAHHAH.AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
#feesh answer#the more i scrolled the more manic laughter leaked out of my face. exolkoiddeploded really#i had no images to accurately convey my emotion. so i had to make one#BEHOLD! MY PHOTO COLLAGE SKILLS!!!!!!🤣#did you really just have yakumo-coloured outfits ready and waiting somewhere in your storage??!#your curation feels like a personal attack even tho i know you just out here doin things for You#me normally: i want the most obnoxious ridiculous over the top colour combo and clashing finalfantasia10000belts mess----#me now: ok but there's something about that 3rd modern one. it's. so simple. but. i. but i......#i need him to be cute and helpful in the traditional ones. i want him walking around in the garden just sniffing pretty flowers#wait no i want him in one of th emodified ones just absolutely DESTROYING eiden's ---#waiT no I want him IN THE FLOWING ETERNALGARMENTS WITH HIS GLOWY EYES AND SOBBING POSSESSED DEMEANOUR BUT NOT ACTUALLY POSSESSED#so just glowing and crying. got it#WAIT NO-#god it's like all the things i used to be meh about or go 'what kinda character design is this'#now i'll see it on yaku and it's.....well......#those maiden buns? the lil twin baobao or whatever? hated thsoe things forever and always#then someone will put em on yakumo and suddenly everything is fine#WHAT IS HE DOING WITH THE LIL. ORBS ON HIS HEAD. I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYONE WHO WEARS THEM.#ONLY LITTLE GIRLIES. IS IT INAPPROPRIATE TO GIVE YAKU THE BUNS#BUT I. IF HE DOESN'T WEAR HIS HAIR LIKE THAT.#i will straihjtt up put steamed buns on his head#and force him to stay still and balance them#until i finish eating them all#it's a game of pile bread on the snake#i will require a stepladder#nu carnival yakumo
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the fact that people still use the "no one would talk to a friend that way" "no one would grieve for someone like that if it was just platonic" etc arguments to prove a ship is canon is so annoying to me. yes i get it, we got queerbaited hard but where does it say that romance has to be higher than a friendship or no one said friends couldn't also be lovers or vice versa....? i normally say "popular media tropes that usually are for romance" when i talk about fiction but pulling a blanket statement like "NO ONE talks to a friend that way" is so invalidating to so much of our queer experiences. the beauty of queer friendship literally lies in the emotional fulfilment we get from our friends in a way that i don't normally see in cishet friendships for whatever reasons. so idk it's just been bothering me to see these kinds of posts every now and then. "you wouldn't do [x] for your friends" i would actually. i would sell my soul for them. i would kill for them and kill myself for them. i would do anything for my friends that i would do for a partner. the "proof" for a ship doesn't have to be by invalidating their friendship. also like aren't most of the ships so powerful when they're also each other's closest friends? do y'all not think of your partners as your best friends?
#sorry for the rant#i know that popular media tropes have changed our mindset on romqnce#it wasn't a thing in my country but now the dating scene is so westernised that it's the same here#im not saying people can't experience romance or friendship differently#in the context of queer people specifically i've noticed that most people struggle to differentiate between platonic and romantic feelings#and often feel a mixture of both or somewhere outside both#it's intense! Regardless#I'm also trying not to invalidate romance or people that experience it totally separately from friendships#but i genuinely wonder#do you stop being friends with the person you're dating#how does thay make sense#them not being your bestest friend?#anyways I'm aroace and in a qpr#maybe i'm just a little sensitive#but queer people also talking in a very heteronormative of looking at romance also confuses me#are we really putting a tag on how much someone grieves???#first of all human relationships dont work that way!!#there's no need to place them in different positions#it's not a competition#every relationship is unique to the two people involved in it#only they can categorize their relationship not outsiders
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