#I need to get this out of my system or else I won't shut up about it for weeks

[loser-brain]

Rant: Internet Safety

Internet Safety is going out the window on Twitter. Many people in the replies and some in quote tweets think that this person is right and that they should actually give out your age to the internet.

YOU. DO. NOT. NEED. TO. GIVE. OUT. YOUR. AGE.

DO NOT GIVE OUT YOUR AGE TO STRANGERS! If a stranger ask block. If you feel unease about them or someone for some reason? Block.

The Blocking feature is your friend... ABUSE THAT BUTTON.

Talked to a person that will ask those that say they are a minor for their actual age just so they can block them. Don't be like that person. Literally just block, that is predatory behavior asking minors their age. You don't need "confirmation" that they are a literal child under 13. Literally block if you just feel unease about them. It's not that hard. Asking them for their age after they told you they are a minor, is predatory behavior.

Doesn't matter if you do not plan to do it for malicious intent. It's predatory to ask a minor their age. Wanna know why I know this, because at one point I did that for a living. I caught predators and reported them to the police. You know what they always do, they target those that give out their actual age in their bio or post (Most popular targets were those as young as 14 to 16. Had one target a 12yr old).

Internet safety is important and people need to learn to just look away and not ask for age. Having the word minor on your profile make you a target as well however not a huge one. People understand that majority of times minor on profile is being use to replace the age 16 or 17 (sometimes younger but I only seen those that are 16 or 17).

Now, Minors this goes to you too. Please, block people who make you feel icky. Block people who ask for your age, they don't have the right to your privacy.

In the Twitter space, their culture is that if you block the other person they win. Hey, listen here, no one give two shit about them having a medal around their neck saying they got blocked by you. They are a sore loser with a large kick me sign for everyone to see.

How to know the sign of a predator. Minors I understand this is terrifying and I'm sorry for giving you more anxiety but understand that anyone can be a predator. Even those of your age can be a predator.

Being a predator isn't always going to be grown adults. If someone that is your age is making jokes about things that makes you uncomfortable but goes as far as to tell you there is nothing wrong with it (when really there is because they are just obsessed on making that certain joke to you and know that makes you uncomfortable) That is what grooming/manipulation is.

They want you to become numb to it. The moment you do, they will then start pushing your boundaries and see how far they can go and what they can say.

A predator will try to get close to you and ask you questions to lower your guard. After some time having your guard down they will start asking you uncomfortable questions. Remember, they want power over you and make you feel like you owe them.

Know the red flags and act quickly when you see them. DO NOT WAIT.

Waiting is the worse thing you can do. It's okay to have doubts but if you have so many red flags to a person then chances are your gut is right and something isn't right.

Red flags that I know

#1: They are far too friendly. Constantly, agreeing with you and not disagreeing with you. They see you have no wrong just so they can get close.

#2: They push your boundaries over and over again. They want to see what they can and can't say. The moment you don't care is the moment they see that as an invitations to do more.

#3: The same with boundaries but they want you to be normalize with them sending either disturbing images or straight up nude. The moment you normalize it they will push further.

#4: Asking to be in a group chat or invite you to one. They ask to be in a group chat and they act like this. They want you to defend them and say that they do this all the time. They want you to normalize this to your friends.

They invite you to one. After you grew numb or been normalize to their behavior they would want to introduce you to their friends. This is the part were the grooming process is near complete.

For both scenarios, they want you to be okay with it. They want you to hopefully help "recruit" more. That is where you have been groomed and were taught/brainwashed into thinking that it is okay to do this.

#5: They want to cut you away from your friends and family. They would do whatever it takes to not lose you. They would do drastic things to you such as say they would harm themselves. They want to take you away from your friends and family. They want to convinces you that it's only you two verses the world.

I'm sure there are more but these are the ones I know and from experience. It's okay to be wary. It's okay to be anxious. It is not okay to ignore the red flags and try to fix it all on your own. The internet is dangerous and the moment you forget that you will be a victim.

Be safe and please for the love of god, USE THE BLOCK FEATURE AND DON'T BE LIKE THAT CREEP. YOU DO NOT OWE ANYONE YOUR PRIVATE INFORMATION.

[nightingale-prompts]

Saving Batboy

First | Previous | Next

It was as though he was being led through the city. Dick seemed to know exactly where he should go next as he drove.

Dick turned off his location as he closed in on Joker's location. If anyone had doubts about what would happen tonight they knew now. The clown dies tonight.

Batman never did it because he knew there would be no coming back once he crossed that line but he was not Batman.

Tim knew the moment Nightwing's symbol disappeared that he had found Joker's location. He knew he could track him still based on where he was before but he held off. The last time Dick crossed the line and killed the Joker, Tim was there to stop him. In the time since Tim had grown to regret it. Especially after Jason's return. He should be avenged after everything that happened.

Tim never put much thought into what happened when he was kidnapped just like Danny. Joker Jr was just a nightmare and everyone pretends it didn't happen. His past self doesn't exist to him and the gaps in his memory are better as they are.

If Dick was really going to finish this then Tim wasn't going to stop him. Bruce's code was his code alone. What of the Robins that suffer for it? What about his kids that he loves to the point of self-destruction if they die?

It was clear to Tim now. Batman isn't strong enough to kill Joker. If he can't handle it, someone else would.

Maybe Dick just cared more. Or maybe he had seen this happen too many times to sit by and let it happen again. The cost be damned.

Tim took a deep breath. He knew it was a bad move but he shut down the bat computer. No one could locate each other for the next 10 minutes. Enough time to give Dick the lead he really needs. All the comms are down and no information can be shared.

Tim looked up and saw Alfred putting down a cup of tea for him. Tim felt like a child caught doing something wrong under Alfred. But Alfred nodded wordlessly before turning to leave. He cast a forlorn glance at Jason's robin uniform before ascending the stairs.

****

"I was hoping Batman would come for the little bat. Oh sorry, I mean the boy." Joker mocked holding Danny by the back of the neck.

The teen's body was limp. His silver locks stained a rusty brown from dried blood. Blood covered his back and legs. If there had been any doubt if the wings were real there is none now.

"…" Nightwingwing said nothing. His fist clenched.

"You know I debated skinning him next. That fur of his would be a lovely shawl. It's so soft. But it looks like I won't have the time now." Joker provoked, running a hand through the boy's white neck fur.

"Get your hands off him." Nightwing demanded, his eyes locked on Danny for any signs of life.

"You know I am so curious what he was doing here. I was about to build a new trap here for fun when I stumbled upon this little guy here. Practically gift-wrapped. Did he run away from you? Just like you did from good ol'papa bat." Joker's smile widened sickeningly "This all feels so familiar, doesn't it little bird? Are you going to finish what you started?"

"I'm never letting you hurt my family again." No witty one-liners. No games. This bad joke ends today.

****

Batman had scoured the area. He memorize the last location Dick was before the system went down. He wasn't these kids' father for nothing he knew what they were doing.

When sound came back he had already made it to the abandoned factory. The comms rang back to life as the sounds of crying came through.

"Nononono…please no. Wake up. Please wake up." It was Dick's voice. "It's okay. I'm here now. So just wake up. We need to get home soon. Your favorite show will be on soon. WAKE UP! YOU CAN'T DIE!"

Batman bolted to their location and found Dick hovering over Danny trying to resuscitate him.

His son looked at him with pleading eyes.

"I can't hear his heart. He's not breathing." He let out a shaky breath. As distressed tears ran down his cheeks.

Bruce knelt next to them. Danny didn't react to the pressure on his chest. The pain should have at least caused an involuntary jerk if he wasn't too far gone.

Bruce signaled Dick to move back as he checked Danny's pulse again. Nothing. And he wasn't breathing. Bruce looked at his son. Deep down Dick probably knew.

"I'm sorry. He's gone." Bruce said simply as he took off his cloak.

Danny looked so peaceful. Like he was sleeping soundly. Bruce hated that his own suspension had been the thing that had prevented him from having a relationship with his own grandson. He felt foolish to not realize that of course Danny and Batboy were the same. It was a brilliant disguise. But he'd never get to say this to the boy.

Bruce wrapped the boy in his cloak.

"Come on. We'll fix this." He told Dick, carrying Danny for him.

The journey back to the manor was silent until.

"I'm sorry." Bruce said.

"Don't. Just Don't. He's my son. Its my fault." Dick rasped his voice scratchy from crying.

Bruce felt a bitter sting. That was exactly what he felt when he lost Jason and what happened with Tim. When Damian lost his life. These pains didn't go away.

When they arrived back in the Batcave Bruce laid Danny's body on the table. The others were notified about what happened and had already gathered.

Barbara looked like she had bawled her eyes out as she hugged Stephanie.

Damian had pressed himself close to Tim as the older brother told him that it was going to be okay.

The new hole in the wall was clearly Jason if his bloodied knuckles were any clues.

Cassandra paced the floor deep in thought. She was moments away from starting a new crusade.

Duke stared off into the distance. His anger boiling under the surface. All he could think about was the number of lives ruined by the Joker and even in death he took another.

Dick stood still as a statue. Thinking about if Danny could be brought back and even if he was his wings were gone. What if he was gone for good? Could he live like that?

Never had he understood Bruce more than in that moment.

Bruce braced himself for what would come next. He had a plan to bring Danny back at any cost.

But suddenly a sound broke through the tension.

A sneeze.

A fucking sneeze.

It came up from under the cloak.

Everyone snapped to look at the body hidden under the cloak. It shifted under the heavy black blanket groggily and yawned. Then Danny jumped up twisting to feel his back.

"What happened!!" He yelped.

[candyskiez]

Thinking about ???%/Shigeo as a character today and losing my mind. Like he's so funny to joke about but also he's SUCH an interesting character (especially from a plural angle, ESPECIALLY when you're a system yourself) and he makes me want to explode. Imagine forming to protect a little kid and deciding you love him so so much and you'll always be there for him, and you love his little brother, and you love his best friend, even though the world doesn't love you very much. But you take it anyway because you have those three and your little family so you're happy. And you have powers and they're a part of you and the other kid and it's fine until it very suddenly Isn't, and nobody's explaining why, just that you need to Stop Having Them. And the kid just decides, okay, I'm sorry, I'll be normal. And you get no explanation. You just have to be suppressed that little bit more. You form because he can't handle being suppressed yet he suppresses you. And then one day it all blows up and you make a mistake trying to protect your little brother and suddenly everyone hates you. Everyone thinks every little thing you've ever done is proof you're a monster and you always would've turned out like this, and you have no idea what they're talking about. You made a mistake trying to save your brother. But because you look scary and act different, even though you've always been there suddenly you existing is dangerous. Because you made a mistake, you are now Irredeemable.

That would fuck ANY kid up. But like, think about it. Shigeo had no one except Tsumobi and Mob and Mob's family. And suddenly he has no one. Mob represses him so deeply. He makes one mistake and suddenly he's not allowed to talk to anyone, suddenly he's completely alone and isolated. He has to share a brain with someone who despises him. He has the trauma of the accident AND the trauma of suddenly losing everyone he loves on top of it. He literally had no one for years. No wonder he's so fucking cynical. All of the shit about "I don't trust anyone" in the manga? Yeah, of course he doesn't. The rug was pulled out from under him so fast. In his eyes everyone just hated him for no reason, because he existed, and everyone would hurt him for existing, so he could only trust himself. Yeah, no wonder he's so selfish, he has no one else there at ALL. It's just...holyyyy hell.

And the thing is if you actually look the little things point to him yearning for connection so desperately. He's still so aggressively protective of his family (even though he lost them a long time ago, they're Mob's now, they don't even know he's there. Don't get me started on that from a plural view. I won't shut up and will probably pour my heart out.), and just ...world domination arc. When he's so upset about losing his family. We know he doesn't trust Reigen. Yet he's running to Reigen for some sort of comfort because he's scared and doesn't want his family to die and wants someone to tell him everything's fine. And Reigen DOES and he believes him. He believes him and immediately passes out. The guy who doesn't trust anyone wants to be loved so so bad and wants to believe Reigen more than anything. He really clearly WANTS to be able to trust Reigen. But he can't. More on this later.

And also thinking about why the build up in confession arc broke him like that is just fucking sad, man. Everyone was telling them to change. Shigeo's been told to change and it meant "be normal". Mob isn't even the one who actually likes Tsumobi like that. Shigeo's being completely repressed and Mob wants to live without him completely. Everyone wants to live without him now that they've used his powers to get this nice perfect life (in his eyes, at least.) Everyone's just trying to forget he ever existed so they can be happy without him, when Shigeo never GOT to heal. He never got to move on. He never got to process any of the god awful shit that happened to him. Everyone's telling him, change. Be normal. Be normal so Tsumobi will like you. And Shigeo's so fucking stressed out of his mind because lying about who he is didn't even help Mob make friends, it didn't make him popular, it didn't make anyone like him, it just made them both miserable. He doesn't want to be stuck like this. Of course he's freaking out. We see in his encounter with the body improvement club that being told to go back to normal sets him off HARD. It's clearly a sensitive subject. "Normal" means "Don't exist" to Shigeo. Do you see why this fucked me up as a system yet. Oh my god.

And his breakdown is just...painfully understandable. Like, actually think about it for a second. Shigeo has never been shown forgiveness or compassion or any amount of understanding for his mistakes. He never was taught to mature or see any nuance. He fucked up, so he doesn't deserve any second chance. Nobody ever taught him compassion. He has such a completely black and white view of the world. If someone did something bad once, they are forever The Bad Thing. If someone was kind to him once, they are forever Good and Perfect. Teru was a threat once, so he is now Always A Threat. Reigen was a liar before so he is Always A Liar. Ritsu was sweet and kind as a kid so he is always His Innocent Little Brother. And Tsumobi accepted him as a kid, so now she's the only person who could ever possibly accept him. Teru sees Shigeo at his most terrifying, when he's actively hunting him down, and in the manga looks at him with fucking hearts in his eyes. Ritsu might not be all perfect, but he's trying so hard and understanding no, Shigeo isn't just a scary part of Mob. Shigeo isn't Evil. But because neither of their acceptance is perfect, and because they aren't from Tsumobi, he can't see it's even there. And also, another thing, his response to people acting outside of his perception of him is to get them away. It scares him. Teru isn't acting how he expected? Attack maim. Ritsu isn't afraid of him anymore? Teleport him away so he doesn't have to confront the change. Reigen acts different? Throw shit at him until he hates him.

It's just so...fuck man. Of course he's like that. He's immature and selfish because nobody taught him not to be. Nobody helped this kid when he needed it and this is the result. He thinks he's an irredeemable monster so he acts like one when he's told to just be himself. He doesn't see change as being realistic. He's been treated the same no matter what he does so he assumes this is how the world naturally is. He's just a bitter mentally ill kid who nobody gave any reason to believe that maybe the world is nice sometimes.

Another thing: I think he really really wants Reigen to care about him. Him going "I can't listen to him" is so intense with the context of the fact he immediately passes out to rest and let Mob take care of it once Reigen says his parents are safe. Reigen can convince him like nobody else can. He cares about him and wants to believe him and that's terrifying! He hates him and resents him and wants him to be proud of him and wants nothing to do with him and it's confusing and he just wants something that is (supposedly) guaranteed. He wants Reigen to care so badly and it feels impossible. Why would he ever care? He just wants to use him. The only way to bring Shigeo back from his breakdown was to show him that people can be kind without wanting something back in return. Reigen saying "you don't need me anymore" was the only real way to help him, to show him that he's not doing this for himself, but because he cares about his student(s). Because he cares about BOTH of them. He cares about every version he's seen and interacted with, not because of his powers but because they were them. He had to let go of them to truly help them here, so Shigeo wouldn't have any lingering fear. What helps Shigeo is the display of kindness with nothing to be gained and Mob finally realizing that Shigeo's just...flawed. They both realize that sometimes people are just flawed and fucked up and make bad decisions and just straight up hurt people. And they'll still love you. They'll still be worth saving. But you can't deny their flaws, for Mob, and you don't need to seek the perfect relationship to have someone there, for Shigeo. It just. Agh! God! I am always losing my mind over this story. Fuck. This SHOW .

[belle--ofthebrawl]

Do you remember my skincare mini series? Do you remember how Rain and Lus were kind of mean to Mountain? I felt kind of bad about that.

the day is long enough to turn you into stone

(contains: Gentle sex near the end, 2k words of mountain getting rubbed down and loved on, trans!rain topping, the glory of a naked cumulus, cockwarming and handfeeding. Written in one go so if something's wrong, no it's not. Unless it's really bad. Will throw it on ao3 whenever.)

Mountain’s been on the move long before dawn, boots on the ground with just enough coffee in his system to convince his aching eyes to open and his tired mind to pay attention. It's the last day in a long stretch of many working ones bedding the gardens and orchards down for what promises to be a proper winter season. Coming in late to the harvest season meant he missed the majority of the fun work; picking and canning and jamming and drying. All that was left was the grunt work, of mending fences and chopping wood, testing and feeding the soil to ensure a good healthy ground to plant the saved seeds in next year. Tools needed to be repaired, sheds and barns and coops needed to be cleaned out and inspected. Feedstores checked and then checked again for the constant threat of pests, but that's helped by the mousers, creeping silently along until a hand was held out and they approached with a purr that rivaled any ghouls.

At some point his brain comes online again. The autopilot shutting off when there's no more work to be done. Of course, there's always more work to be done, but as Mountain sits stop a boulder and slowly chews his way through the sandwich someone had handed to him hours and hours and hours ago, he can't think of anything else he’d like to do more than go to sleep for the rest of the year.

(Divider by @forlorn-crows)

Not like this though. He wouldn't sleep well if he was filthy, caked in the day’s worth of sweat and grime and he honestly can't remember the last time he showered but he thinks the garden hose should suffice as he passes it on his way in. His clothes are tossed in a pail to be retrieved at some other point in time for laundry and he relishes the cold burst of water that hits his skin, tracking down through the dirt that might as well be engrained underneath.A cleaning rag from one pocket is taken to scrub what he seems the worst of it off with help of a shrunken and discolored ball of tallow and lye soap taken from another pocket. He reasons that he'll probably dry before he gets to his room and that the sight of a nude ghoul won't surprise anyone at this point. The rules were a bit laxer around this time of year, since novitiates weren't traditionally moved in until the longest and darkest night.

But there's a wrench thrown into his plans, as soon as he opens the door to his room. The motion sends a flurry of rose petals scattering across the floorboards, just a few in a trail that leads to his bathroom door, cracked open to waft out the scent of something decidedly not of his own toiletry collection. There's just enough candlelight in the tiny room for him to see he won't be spending the night alone.

“I'm not cleaning this up.” Is the only thing he can think to say as Rain opens the door wider. He's shockingly clothed but in such a way to suggest he won't be staying so for very long. Loose, flowing fabric, draped easily and easy to pull off. Mountain tries to be interested, really he does, but it's just that he's so damn tired and the bed is right there. His bones ache. His head aches. Rain is very pretty but Mountain is very, very exhausted.

“Don't worry about it.” Rain says dismissively. He beckons with an elegant arm outstretched and like the work-dog he feels he really is, Mountain obeys with a hanging head. “Oh, stop moping. We're doing something different tonight.”

“Not moping.” He says, sounding childish and petulant but the attitude disappears as soon as he sees the tub. His battered old claw foot has been utterly transformed, scrubbed clean and shining in the low light. The water, tepid on the best of days, has been heated so that fragrant steam rises in lazy whirls as Rain leads him to it. He can pick out lavender and chamomile right away, but it's not his own mixture. It's something from the water ghoul’s expensive and luxurious collection, something that came in an elegantly wrought alabaster jar that Rain pours from as Mountain gathers enough braincells to realize the bath is, in fact, for him.

“Go on.” Rain says. “I can't add everything else until you do.”

Words fail him, especially as he tests the water with his fingers and finds it delightfully hot. Slipping his whole body underneath it brings out deep and guttural noise from his chest, near sexual as it envelops him. His eyes are heavy and refuse to remain open.

“Mmrhn?” Is the best he can manage as a lid is twirled open and the gentle hiss of dry herbs hit the water.

“Pain relief mixture.” Rain murmurs, continuing to sprinkle. “Your own.”

A special blend of three salts, eleven herbs, and four oils. He knows them all by name but his brain dips offline again as Rain comes to perch on the lip of the tub by his shoulders. Mountain cracks his eye open in a Herculean effort and is rewarded with the glimpse of a small silver bowl dipping into the water and, most importantly, the sight of Rain’s clothing folded neatly on the counter by the sink.

He's just a Ghoul, after all.

“Close your eyes.” Rain gently admonishes and Mountain does. The water is poured over his hair and face, Rain giving extra attention to his beard to make sure no part of Mountain is left untouched and dry. Cool cream is smeared on the bare skin of his face with a dampened towel wrapped carefully around his head so he can still breath while whatever Rain out on his works it's magic. Something else is combed patiently through his tangled hair and left to soak in as Rain scratches tenderly at his scalp.

He drifts off; into a hazy dreamscape of grey and gardens that never need tending. His feet float above the ground so his body never aches with the weight of carrying itself around all day and somewhere in the mist, he knows someone waits. Just as he's about to find them and take them in his arms, they call out gently a name not his own and he's too tired to startle, but manages an impressive snort as Cumulus chuckles.

“How's he doing?” She whispers and Mountain hopes she's just as naked as he and Rain are.

“He’d fall asleep right here if we let him.” Rain replies. “Did you find the rose lotion? The one in a square bottle?”

“I thought we weren't doing that rose lotion.” Cumulus answers, setting what sounds like a basket down on the countertop. “Remember? It was too waxy and not moisturizing enough.”

“Oh.” Rain says, starting to unwrap the towel from Mountain’s face. His vision is blurred and he can't make out much- just the figure of his beautiful Lus gleaming mother naked in the candlelight as she unpacks her basket, setting each item down with reverence after a thorough inspection. “Right. Look, in my defense, we came up with this idea when we were smoking.”

“Nuh-uh.” Cumulus counters, a smile in her voice so rich he can hear the dimples. “You forgot everything we agreed on as soon as we saw Mountain strip down and hose off.”

“Okay.” Rain says amicably. “And? Like you're any better.”

“Surprised you haven't dove in there with him yet.”

Mountain makes a noise that informs everyone present he would very much enjoy Rain diving in to join him. But that would leave Lus out and he wants his Lus as well, it's not fair to leave her in the candlelight, lovely as she looks in it.

“He agrees with me.”

“He's agreeing with me.”

They're being so nice to him for once. He thinks the bickering has taken a different turn but it's not like there are any real stakes at play here. Rain’s washing his hair now, soaping out the mask he applied earlier and rinsing the suds out as Cumulus sits on his other side and presses something to his mouth. He opens as he's bid and lets her handfeed him some impossibly delicious, crispy bite of food. Savory and meaty in a flaky shell. His own recipe that he can recognize even as the last of his brain drips out of his skull in the heat of the water and the two beside him. His mouth is wiped when he finishes, cool water out to his lips and he drinks. The next course of fruit and cheese begins as Rain fusses with conditioner, snips at his scraggly beard with a little pair of shears and even cleans and files his nails, brushing on yet another oil to the keratin.

“I could watch you pamper our man all day.” Cumulus teases, holding out a cube of cheese on a stick. Rain takes it gracefully, giving her extended and pointed eye contact as he draws back. Mountain wheezes and the noise brings their attention back on him again.

“Your turn.” Rain says.

He's helped out of the water, gone tepid by now and for once his body doesn't complain about the work of moving joints and muscles and his bones don't feel like they’ve been filled with lead. Cumulus dries him with her power, keeping him warm thermals harnessed to keep him from shivering. His skin, dry from the heat and the harshness of his own soap, is coated in a shea butter lotion and he's led from the bathroom to his bed with a fire crackling in the grate.

“Lay down.” She says, and he obeys. On his back at first but she flips him with ease onto his stomach and really, he's got no complaints there. She's easy to underestimate, always seen with a box of sweets and tucked up with a book but only a fool forgets she's a menace from the pit. Being spoiled up top just suits her better and she's got years of experience to draw on as she straddles his back. Hands that once ripped jawbone from skull press tenderly into his muscles and he forgets everything again as she works him, fingers dancing like she's playing her piano. Her body is a comforting weight atop him, easing any lingering anxiety he might have had about things being left undone or not good enough. It's no use to worry without energy to act on it. If things go wrong, he’ll be rested and restored enough to deal with them. Even his tail is lovingly played with, tugged on and rubbed until it settles.

At some point, she slips off and lays next to him with a little plate of chocolates. Rain’s on him now, pouring more oil in a straight line down his back, humming as he dots more here and there. Mountain grumbles until he's fed a candied pecan from Lus’ lips and the kiss distracts him enough so that he doesn't notice Rain shuffling back to sit on his knees as he idly plays in the spills of oil, finger painting that takes his hands lower and lower.

With one hand on each cheek, Rain pulls him apart. Warm oil splatters directly on his hole and he jolts with a whimper that Lus smothers with her chest. Rain dips two fingers inside, easily finding the spot that has his legs shaking in moments. He didn't have the energy for sex, he thought, but what they wanted was vastly different than what he expected. Rain’s fingers steadily pump in and out of his body for ages as he and Lus kiss, the water leaving his own lip prints in the film slowly absorbing into Mountain’s skin.

“You hard, baby?” Lus asks him between breaths and Mountain is embarrassed at the way he whispers out no, chasing the taste of her but she just smiles patiently at him.

“Don't need to be, honey. We’ll take care of you.”

When he's finally deemed ready, he's pushed onto his side, Rain tight to his back while Lus throws a luscious thigh over his hip, going for his neck. He feels the press of Rain's breasts against his shoulder blades, his own hips rocking for purchase until his tentacle eases out of Rain's body and wriggling home into Mountain's. It curls up inside him, heavy and deep and pressed right where he needs it. His cock is gripped in a soft, manicured hand, not to rub and tease but just to hold and comfort. He doesn't know which way to turn to kiss them and their laughter is gentle.

“Just let us take care of you.” Whispers one.

“It's the least we could do in return.” Murmurs the other.

His sleep, after an orgasm milked from his still soft cock, is deep and dreamless. It's a long time before all three of them wake up.

[the-voldsoy]

Parallels/references/a couple theories about TMAGP EP1:

grouped in order of actual theories, vague things i noticed, and even vaguer comments! (using the same terminology as in TMA for ease)

HEAVY Spoilers !!

Stronger:

“Colin, mate, you know you’re never getting out of here” +won't leave until they figure out the errors “Or they finally kill me” → couldn't quit the Archives because they thought they just wanted to understand and know (but later found out they could only get out by dying or blinding)

Lena talks about cake → Mr Spider doesn't like cake + Elias seemed to love the stuff

pub called The Seward -> Peter Lukas vibes?

“There has to be a way to do this online” → haha ! you wish. (AKA supernatural interferes with internet so it cant be dont online)

“There's this box for a "Response 121" on the form.” → MAG121 is the episode Jon is woken from his coma/brought back to life by Oliver Banks

Talk about how there used to be a separate “Response” department → Elias tells Jon its their job to watch, not interfere (iirc)

Old as shit computer → old as shit tape recorders

AKA: the computer seems to be the only thing that can handle the supernatural

“ "Dolls comma watching" or "Dolls comma human skin" “ → violently Stranger and possibly Eye, has me in mind of MAG24 (the one the Calliope is first mentioned in, where the boyfriend is turned into a doll iirc) 

Barely understandable, long as shit file names →barely understandable, long as shit files names by Gertrude 

[in response to where the files go] “some long dead database that no one will ever look at or care about” → the Archives were unmanaged, decrepit and barely used by anyone outside of them

Work during the night - no sun, cut off from outside world → worked in a basement - no sun, cut off from outside world

Martin (and later Jon) taking the statements → did the same in TMA but in reverse (although I’d love to know if there's any reason behind them being called Chester and Norris, besides what's stated?)

Haha Martin and Jon (and Jonah) are now part of the World Wide Web → shit now they're part of the Web (just like with the tape recorders !!)

Someone talks about how they're sorry, they should've listened, couldn't face not hearing him again → martin @ jon and vice versa

Stranger statement with hints of the Dark → first TMA statement was a Stranger in the dark, and it does put me in mind of the Anglerfish tbh

Sorting system for the statements (although there's is a Lot more detailed and v different) → Smirke’s Fourteen

Gwen openly does not like Lena → literally anyone @ Elias

Asked if they were tricked into working here → well, we know the Archives and Elias

“The awful, terrible thing that landed you here?” → most of the Archives (excluding Sasha and maybe Martin) had something that made them Marked, that mostly led to them working there

Someone who's into spelunking listed the Institute as “cleared” → who could that be (if we know them at all)? Buried avatar, i'd guess, but we don't really know any of them

Photos of the Institute don't show up → photos of the supernatural don't work

The Institute was “weird”, made the subject paranoid → lingering Eye

Fire twenty years ago that burned the Institute → Like the fire at Hilltop Road? Or like that time Gertrude tried to burn down the Institute?

Third floor was the most burned → assuming that's the top floor (and correct me if i'm wrong), wasn’t Jonah in (and later killed) on the top floor?

“offices like little cells” → employees were certainly trapped ! also Millbank Prison

Worried non-existent doors were going to slam shut → the Distortion

Weren’t any papers → left behind before the Institute came to this Somewhere Else (assuming it's the same Institute)? (we need an actual name for the original universe and this Somewhere Else)

Suspicious stains on some floors → my darling, that is blood ! or possibly squished worms, or ink. or possibly something Else

“an old wooden thing with a bunch of similar symbols on” → genuinely unsure what this could be

Strange symbols → For all the Fears, or just the Eye, i wonder? I think i remember them saying something about an Eye symbol at this point, but now i can't find where

“you get a job, I get a fresh victim. It’s all in your contract.” → Elias @ his employees

 “To new beginnings, with old friends” → to a new beginning, with our old friends Jon, Martin and Jimmy Magma :)

“You’re not as clever as you think you are. You think you've got us all fooled, that no-one knows you're listening, But I do. I know. I’m going to find you and then…” → hi what did he mean by this

They (jon, martin & jonah) are Watching and Listening and following through technology→ just like Elias (Panopticon vibes tbh) and Sergey Ushanka

Vaguer (idk if theres anyhting here, but wanted to include it anyway):

Alice loves coffee -> Martin loved tea

Meeting in a cemetery → Sasha with Michael pre-prentiss attack, Naomi Herne 

Not wanting to stay at home because it's full of memories → Jon moving with Georgie, Martin moving to the Archives

Gwen Bouchard wants Lena’s job → Bouchard (appeared to) climb the job ladder quicker than he should have

Heh bug list → corruption

 “You don’t seem like the usual hopeless wasters Lena hires” “The awful, terrible thing that landed you here?” → okayy no need to be rude. But anyways the OG Archives crew were actually pretty disconnected from the rest of the world +were barely there by choice?

“freight cars near Brighton” → hey where did Melanie get her first Slaughter mark ?

“it’s not too awkward working with an ex?” → Georgie and Jon?

FR3-d1 -> i feel like there's something there, but i cannot figure it out

Just words that made me irrationally scared:

Stranger(‘s)

Distortion

Opposites:

Starts with a party for someone leaving → couldn't quit the archives

“ …you are perfectly within your rights to resign. No one is forcing you to stay here.”

please put any opinions/additions in the tags !!

[missterious-figure]

Part 2

Sun was staring at something, but you couldn't hear or see anything out of the ordinary in your yard... whatever it was that was bothering Sun was definitely coming from beyond the wooden fence. You listened silently, hoping for some clue or indication as to what had the mer so on-edge. The faint rustling of leaves from the other side of the fence caught your attention. You heard a few deep grumpy mumbles, followed by a lighter-voiced angry retort, and your heart nearly stopped.

You recognized those voices. The first one was your dad's, the second belonged to your mother. And by the sound of it, your dad was being told to climb the fence. Instant panic flooded your system and you shoved Sun back into the pond. Of course the mer was quite confused as to why you were now pushing him away. He tried to swim back to you, gurgling, but you quickly put a finger over your mouth. He seemed to understand, as he shut his mouth mid-squeak.

"Sun, be a good boy and hide, okay?"

You said frantically as you stood up and tried to shoo him back underwater. Still quiet as a mouse, he tilted his head.

"You know, hide? Dive! Go back under until I come get you, okay?"

He finally got it, and disappeared under the murky water. Just in time! Your father poked his head over the fence, leaves and twigs sticking in his hair. You turned to face him, using all your might to stop yourself from giggling. You knew he would yell at you if you did. Before you could even get upset at him, he barked in a rather unpleasant tone,

"Who were you talking to? I heard you talking to someone."

"Who said you could climb over my fence? And when did I say you could come visit me?"

He scowled at your remark.

"I'm your father, I don't need permission to visit you."

You decided to make things short. You already didn't what to deal with him any longer.

"So what do you want? If you're going to ask me to come back, I'm not."

He glared angrily, and you could tell that's probably along the lines of what he wanted to talk to you about.

"You owe me and your mother everything! We are your parents! And we certainly didn't raise you to be such ill mannered and arrogant brat!"

Growling, he began to heave himself over the fence.

"One way or another, you will come back, even if I have to drag you myself! Now come on, the car is still running and I won't argue with you anymore!"

You stepped back, terrified. Was your crazy fuck of a dad really trying to kidnap you? You hurriedly scrambled to get your phone from your pocket and dialed 9-1-1. The look of terror on your on your dad's face was quite evident, as he froze, then began to climb back down the other side of the fence.

"Y-yeah that's right I'll- I'll call the cops on you!"

He quickly disappeared and you heard a car door slam. Tires screeched as and drove off into the distance, until they faded away.

Wow. Fuck. That was fast. You were lucky your father was so afraid of getting caught by the police (mostly so his reputation wouldn't be ruined, you thought to yourself) that the mere mention of you dialing 9-1-1 was enough to send him packing. Hopefully, your parents would keep believing the whole "I'll call the cops" ruse. If not, you weren't sure how else you would make them leave you alone. Deep down, you knew you could never actually call the police. What if the cops found out about Sun somehow? What would they do to him? And his brothers, Moon and Eclipse?

You didn't what to think about that. You shook the thoughts from your head and collapsed onto you knees next to Sun's pond. This whole situation was a headache to think about, and your parents were getting more pushy and forceful. You couldn't take another one of their visits. You had no idea when, but you had started crying. Streams of tears trickled down your face and your nose became runny. You buried your head in your hands. This was all to much...

Sun slowly bobbled his head up to the surface, his big round eyes staring intently.

"Muhrrp?"

Your dropped your hands to your knees quietly. You took a better look at his face. There was clearly a look of concern on his face. He probably saw the whole situation, from under the water. He slowly pulled himself ashore, his face now inches from yours. After a few moments of the two of you staring at each other, he gently pressed his closed mouth onto your tear soaked cheek. You sat there stunned for a moment, completely caught off guard. Did he just... give you a kiss? You couldn't help but smile, a few more tears, happy tears, slipping from your eyes.

You slammed yourself into Sun almost sending both of you back into the water. He wasn't sure what to do at first, but he quickly caught on. He wrapped his arms around you, rubbing your back. He gurgled and cooed in a soothing way, as if he was actually talking words of comfort. Even though he was wet and a little slimy, you were grateful for this. Even if you hadn't known him very long, he was more loving than your family had ever been during your whole life time.

"Thank you, Sun."

***

Link to part 1 below

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

Genuinely trying to understand why a gay person would be supporting the party you do.

Not American myself but from what I understand there’s a lot of homophobia there.

It doesn’t look like Democrats are perfect either but at least less hostile to gays?

I'll dispense with my usual "Shut the fuck up European" image response because you do actually seem genuine, so here's my genuine answer.

Yeah, there's some homophobia on the right. Some. It's nowhere near what the media would have you believe. But there's homophobia on the left, too. The left just has the media and their ability to shape a narrative on their side. The worst thing I've had said to me by someone on the right was that they don't support gay marriage and think its a sin. Or that they think gay sex is disgusting. And that's fine. I don't like hearing about certain sexual acts myself and find them gross and weird. I don't need anyone else to approve or support my sex life.

And as for the part about gay marriage, I understand where most of them are coming from when they say that, too. They truly feel that their religious beliefs are under attack and that religious marriage is supposed to be between one man and one woman. But even many of those people will say that they don't really care if gays get legally married as long as there's some differentiation between the religious ceremony of marriage, and the legal institution of marriage, which are two different things. I personally don't need anyone to validate my marriage but me and my husband. I don't care if it's legally recognized. I don't care if it's recognized by any particular church. My marriage and my relationships are my own personal business. And there are a lot of people on the right who feel the exact same way.

So, that's the worst I've gotten from the right. Let's talk about the worst I've gotten from the supposedly gay friendly left. The following is not a complete list, but here's some of the things that I've been told by Democrats and other leftists when they find out I'm a gay right winger, both online and offline:

Kill yourself

Die faggot

You should be gay bashed

I hope you get raped by a closeted Republican politician

I hope your dog dies

Kill yourself

You're a traitor to all gay people

Kill yourself with one of those guns you love

I hope you get cancer and die horribly

I hope your husband dies

You should be sent to a concentration camp

Kill yourself

and basically every anti-gay slur you can possibly think of

That's what I get from the left, from other gay people, when they find out I vote differently then they do. Just based on these anecdotal experiences with the American right and the American left, I think it's pretty clear why I find myself on one side and not the other.

But!

I'm not a one issue voter. Gay issues are mostly meaningless to me. What I care about are personal freedoms, protecting my rights, and the success of my country on the world stage. Currently, the American right aligns with those beliefs way more than the left. That's not to say the Republican Party always aligns perfectly with what I want or believe, but the reality is we live in a two party system. Until enough of us get together and make a nationally viable third party, if the choice in presidential elections is between one party that I almost never agree with and whose stated goals are to violate my rights and destroy everything I love about America, and one party that does what I voted for them to do around half the time, of course I'm voting for the second party nationally.

Locally it can be a bit different. It's easier to effect local elections and policies just by being active, and in geographically close areas the differences between the people running for town council might not be as wide as two people running for president nationally, so I won't just vote the R party line by default. I've voted libertarian locally before. Hell, I even voted Democrat once. But, for the most part, it's the Republicans who I feel will do what I think should be done more than the other parties. And that's why I vote for them, and why I'm a registered Republican. Well, that and I want to be able to vote in the Republican primaries.

[pinkcherryblossomphonecase]

Sugar Crash

(Cooper eats too much candy on Halloween when he was still apart of XY)

Tags: @myluckymoon @oscarsgallery @justsigma-bsd @kijimha @city-of-c0rpses @deeply-moonstruck @doakarma

Never in my life have I ever had to beg for candy. But I was so desperate for some. Normal food and meals were already a privilege to have, but candy, sweets, desserts, was impossible to ever have. If I ever wanted anything remotely sweet, I had to be on good behavior for the entire week, just to earn a single slice of cake or a scoop of ice cream. It was a little reward system to keep me in line.

The only problem was it was the day of Halloween, and unfortunately, I wasn't on my best behavior that week due to an incident earlier during the week. So that means I wasn't allowed to have any candy or sugar as a reward. Normally, I would be fine with this light punishment, but something about Halloween always made me sugar crazy. Like a spell or trance has me in choke hold, and I need to consume candy or else it would be the end of the world for me.

And here I was, quite literally begging on my knees in front of Master X. He was busy doing some paperwork. At first, he looked amused that I would go to the extremes of begging for a few pieces of candy. But after a while, I think I annoyed him enough, or he got bored as he let out, scoffed with a sigh.

"Cooper, stop it. I have work to do, and you're distracting me. Keep this up, and I won't give you any sweets for a month." He harshly stated, mildly annoyed.

"But master you don't understand! I need candy right now! This is a once a year day where my body loses control and goes insane if I don't consume sugar." I plead.

Master rolled his eyes, his hand reaching for the drawer to take out the duck tape he keeps in there to shut me up. "You're not possessed, Cooper. Now quit it."

I reached for his hand and tried to stop him. "Please, just for one day. All I want is some lollipops and chocolates. I'll stop complaining if you let me have this one privilege."

"We don't even have any c-"

"Liar! I saw a whole bag you kept hidden for the others in the closet while I was putting away your laundry!" I yelled in desperation. Normally, I wouldn't dare step out of line like this ever. But I promise you, it was the desperation for candy that drives me this mad. I truly do lose control over myself on this one day.

Master was about to slap me and shut me up with the tape, but I looked at him with pleading eyes. I was determined to win this fight. A bit too stubborn. After staring at me for a while, he gives an annoyed groan.

"Fine. You can have some. Just don't eat the whole damn bag and no sugar for a month afterwards." He scoffed.

I practically bounced and beamed with joy. "YAY! :D THANK YOU MASTER!" I gave a quick hug before running off to get the bag.

Oh what joys it was to rip open the bag and dig around for the good candies. Butterfingers, Tootsies Rolls, Dumbdums, Airheads. It was a dream come true as I munched and feasted on the sugar like it was a fine dine meal.

Master X shouldn't have left me unsupervised. Someone should have kept an eye on me and stopped me. Because I ate and ate like there was no tomorrow. Before I knew it, the entire bag was empty, and I was reaching in for nothing.nothing.

That's when the crash hit and everything just shut down, leaving me on the floor.

I should have been back to doing my chores. But here I was, laying on the floor of the living room, clenching my stomach as I groaned in pain. It's like a train just suddenly hit me and everything in my system has shut down. Talk about sugar overload.

Other members walked by and pasted me, not giving a crap about my suffering. They all gave me a weird look, silently scolding me for eating the entire bag of candy.

Even master came by, but he just shook his head. "I told you not to eat the whole bag. Now, you must face the consequences of your actions. Enjoy your sugar crash. No more sweets for you for an entire month."

"So worth it, though...." I mumbling on the floor, passing out right there. I probably slept there for the night with a bucket besides me. Still worth it in the end.

[feelingdozy]

Sleepover

Peeta Mellark x Reader

Hunger Games Masterlist

Summary: waiting for the revolution to take place in district 13, you and Peeta decide to have your first sleepover before everything goes down.

Warnings: weight insecurity/body image

You never knew when it was dark out, relying on the timing of district 13 to tell you when it was lights out. It had been a weird switch. Staying underground constantly made you feel a little claustrophobic in a sense, like you weren't able to ever go above ground.

You hated how an easily erased schedule made your whole day, you wished you'd have more free time throughout. Although you really didn't care about the classes, you'd still gone to them and took notes, knowing how over dramatic they are about their schedules. It's like if you're off by one minute, you've automatically messed up their whole system.

You walked back to your little housing situation, sharing one with Peeta, your best friend. And now because of the games your relationship has progressed into a romantic one, needing to quickly as you wouldn't have been able to make it out of the games alive if not.

The capitol had rushed it, making everything go by so fast. You two couldn't enjoy simple moments together, Peeta proposing immediately after the tours you had been through. Just for the pleasure of the capitol and Snow. You both absolutely couldn't stand Snow, so being in district 13 helped a lot.

"I'm so tired"

You yawned loudly as you collapsed onto his bed, it being the closest to you from where you were.

"hey! I just made that"

"too bad"

Your body relaxed on his bed, taking in the scent of him that calmed you. No matter what it was, if it was of him it always comforted you.

"hey- what are you doing!?"

You felt his hands on your waist, and all of a sudden he had lifted you over his shoulder. You were pretty heavy, wondering if it hurt him a bit. His blanket hit him in the face as you hung onto it well being lifted to try and keep yourself close to the bed, obviously not working.

"how are you even this strong? I'm pretty heavy-"

"your perfectly fine if I can carry you sweetheart"

Your heart pounded when he called you names like that. Sweetheart. Your face was now a bright red, the anxiety and nickname working together to create it.

He carried you over to your bed on the opposite side of the room, carefully dropping you as he didn't want to hurt you. You quickly covered your violently red face with his blanket, feeling like he could feel the heat radiating off of it from where he stood above you.

He yanked it from your arms, wanting to uncover your face and retrieve his blanket for his freshly made bed.

"hey come on give me my blanket back!-"

He finally managed to get it from your tight grip, slowly processing your face before you turned your head into the pillow. He always loved to absorb your emotions, enjoying how you reacted. And this one was new to his eyes.

"are you-"

"shut up!"

He laughed, filling up the room as it echoed. You loved his laugh, it always made you smile. But right now, it was only making your face even redder. He sat on the bed beside you, the mattress deepening from the weight. You somewhat rolled toward him from the weight difference, tapping his back with yours making contact.

"come onnn, roll over y/n"

"You're just gonna make fun of me"

Your voice was muffled by the pillow you were on, not trusting yourself to be able to look at him without a red blush.

"I won't I promise. Please"

He thought of what else could convince you in the moment, trying to grab your waist and turn you to face him.

"please.. sweetheart?"

Your face grew even redder, not knowing it was possible to feel your heartbeat and warmth this much.

"please-"

Your voice trembling at this point,

"I can't handle it, you're gonna make me even worse"

"even worse?"

You finally turned to him, giving in. His eyes were staring deeply at your face, then your hair, then your eyes and lips. he went over them all carefully, memorizing the blush and the emotion in your eyes. The way they looked at him with embarrassment, but also lovingly.

"you see how red I am? I'm basically a heater."

He laughed again, gaining another laugh from you not being able to contain it after his. You admired the way his mouth lifted into the laugh, his eyes too, same with his hair. Everything about him, you realized, was amazing.

"How about we have a sleepover hm?"

"You're always laying with me. Just stay here a little longer and call it a sleepover"

You both laughed, basking in each others company.

"have I.. ever kissed you in private y/n?"

Your eyes widened in a bit of shock. It was quite a random question, but your face still reacted fast.

"without a camera in our faces?"

"no- no.. I don't think so...why?"

He placed his hand gently on your cheek, slowly leaning down to your level on the pillow.

"may I sweetheart?"

"how could I say no to the Peeta Mellark?"

[its-all-or-nothing94]

Out of your system // Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz x Reader

Summary: You are in a completely different dojo and face Cobra Kai, including Hawk and Tory, at a tourney. The tension between you and Hawk is too strong from the beginning, and well, you just need to get it out of your system. But there is something else...

Pairing: Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz x Reader

Warnings: Language, fighting, wild make-out session

A/N: This is my first Cobra Kai Story :) Hope you enjoy! (The way Hawk would look at you!)

Exuberant and confident, the Cobra Kai students stand in front of the arena. As always, they know, or think they know, that they will bring home the trophy again this year.

"Hey guys, have you heard about that other dojo?" blurts Mitch and the others look at him.

"What dojo? What the hell are you talking about?" asks Hawk, raising an eyebrow. His look is the same as always. Arrogant and cocky.

"I heard about a dojo competing today, and supposedly they have a real machine," Mitch continues.

At this moment, a car pulls up. It is a matte black Audi RS3 Sportback, and a silver panther is on the side. The students of Cobra Kai look up in anticipation.

"You got to be shitting me...," Hawk breathes as he sees the sticker of a dojo on the back window.

Silver Panther Dojo

Hawk's mouth drops open as he spots you getting off. For a moment, he stares at you, but then you turn around and brush a strand of hair behind your ear. He's rarely seen a prettier girl than you.

Then you look at Hawk, who briefly averts his eyes, but then he looks at you again. You meet his gaze and then raise an eyebrow before snorting in amusement and disappearing inside the arena.

"What the hell was that?" asks Tory after a while, looking at Hawk.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You - dumbass," she says, then looks at the entrance. "And her. You just undressed her with your eyes."

"No, I didn't," Hawk waves off.

"Oh, yes, you did," Tory teases him further, but Hawk has had enough. He stands very close in front of Tory and looks at her menacingly.

"I fucking did not!"

Just as Tory is about to say something else, Kreese steps behind her. "Come on! In you go!"

As they change clothes and wait to warm up, Hawk spots you again. You're standing a few feet from him, stretching. Hawk's eyes roam over your perfect body. You're so flexible, and those curves...

"Snap out of it, will you! I'm not gonna lose that trophy 'cause you give our competition the fuck-eyes."

Annoyed, Hawk turns to Tory. "Just shut the fuck up, Tory, okay. I'm not giving her the fuck-eyes. And I will prove it to you."

Hawk stands behind you and lets his gaze roam over your backside once more. He waves Mitch, Edwin, and a few others over, then walks toward you. Tory follows them as well, eager to see what he does now.

At that moment, you stand up straight, grab your towel, and then turn around. You didn't expect to almost run into Hawk like that. You take another step backward, but Hawk steps in front of you again.

The tension between you is charged, and you can almost hear it crackle.

"Can I help you?" you ask, perkily raising an eyebrow.

Hawk's typical smug smile appears on his face. "You wanna help us, princess? If anything else, we are gonna help you."

You snort. "Oh yeah?" You now take a step closer to Hawk and whisper against his lips. "Guess what, Mohawk. I don't need your help."

You're about to push past him when Hawk grabs you by the arm. "You're pretty cheeky. You know that?" he asks, and your lips are only inches apart. "Just know we won't go easy on you just because you're a girl. We will take you down."

You yank your arm away from Hawk. "Oh, I'd like to see you try."

As you stomp away, Hawk watches you go. As you disappear around the corner, he turns to Tory to show her he is right, but Tory just laughs.

"Wow, you serious? The fucking tension between you two makes me sick."

Annoyed, Hawk turns away from Tory. He's not attracted to you after all. The only one who had his attention until now was Moon, but now... His gaze briefly wanders to the bench in the back, where he can see you talking to your sensei. At that moment, you look up and give Hawk a dirty look.

Then it finally starts. The first few fights begin, and Hawk watches anxiously. He wants to know what's coming up, after all.

"Next up, Mitchell Sanders against Y/N Y/L/N," the speaker calls out, and Mitch stands next to Hawk.

"A girl. Should be an easy one," he says, and Hawk punches in at him. But then the two see who is getting ready. It's you. Hawk laughs and then comes over to you.

"Now let's see what you are made of, princess," he says, and you look up at him.

"With pleasure!" she pushes Hawk aside and then joins Mitch on the mat.

"Okay, bow to each other," the referee calls, and you bow to your opponent, who does the same. You quickly realize he's from the same dojo as the pompous guy with the mohawk. "Good, now bow to me," the ref continues.

Then the fight begins. Hawk smugly stands next to the mat and watches you, but the smirk quickly disappears from his face as he watches you fight. You are just incredible. Slowly he lowers his arms, and his mouth opens. It doesn't take long, and Mitch is on his back.

"One Point!" says the ref, pointing at you.

"Wow, your girlfriend is really good," Tory says, standing next to Hawk.

"She's not my fucking girlfriend." Furious, Hawk stomps away.

The following fights are not unexpected. Hawk defeats his opponents, Tory defeats hers, and you defeat yours. The board indicates that the next fight is between Tory and you.

"Next up: Tory Nichols from Cobra Kai and Y/N Y/L/N from Silver Panther."

You and Tory face each other. You bow and then take your fighting positions.

"You know what a silver panther is, right?" Tory asks you, and you squeeze your eyes together. You've watched her before and know she's trying to intimidate her opponents. However, you don't respond. "Silver Panthers are the old ones. Slow and without reaction."

"Why don't you just shut up, huh? More fighting, less talking," you say, clenching your fists.

When the ref gives the okay, you both fire away and start punching each other. Your talents are incredibly even; one by one, you score until the score is 2-2.

As you get ready to face each other for the third and final time, you see the guy with the mohawk standing behind Tory, watching you. Tory follows your gaze and then grins at you.

"No worries. He will fuck you either way. Even if you lose."

You frown, and your attention returns to Tory. Then the ref gives the go-ahead, and you start punching her. Over and over, you kick at her, then hit her again with your fists so she can only defend herself and nothing else.

Again you face each other. Then you do a pike roll, put your legs around her middle, and roll again, so she slams on the mat. Quickly you sit on her and give her the last blow. In the corner of your eye, you see the ref's flag go up.

"One Point." He takes your hand and raises it. "Winner."

You send a smug smile toward Mohawk before kneeling to Tory. "You know... Now that I won, maybe I will fuck him," you say, winking at her.

"The big finale is done. We start in fifteen minutes. Hawk against Y/N Y/L/N. Let's see who will be the new All Valley Champion."

"That bitch!" grumbles Tory as she sits on the floor next to Hawk.

"Oh, now you don't like her that much. What?" Hawk teases her.

"Shut up, Hawk! You still have to face her. Oh, and btws, I think she wants to fuck you, too."

Hawk's head shoots up, and he looks at Tory. "What the fuck are you talking about now?"

Tory stands up and walks toward Hawk. "You eye-fucked her since she got here, and the tension between you is far from enduring. That's why I told her that you would fuck her even if she loses. When that bitch won, she said she's probably gonna fuck you anyway now."

Hawk and Tory look over at you, and you feel their eyes on you, which is why you look up. Your gaze meets Hawk's, and you both stare at each other for a moment.

When the fight finally starts, you face Hawk and bow. He does so as well, and his gaze remains on your eyes.

"Fighting positions!"

You take your position and raise your hands. When the ref gives the go, you go right at it. You kick at Hawk, but he blocks all your punches.

As you lunge again, he grabs your leg and pulls you closer to him so that your faces are once again inches apart.

"So, how about that fuck later?" he whispers to you, and you're totally thrown off your game, which is why he can throw you onto your back easily.

"One Point."

Hawk reaches out to help you up, but you swat it away and resume your fighting stance.

"That was dirty," you hiss at him, and he winks.

"Not as dirty, what I will do to you later."

"Go!"

The two of you start fighting each other again, and it continues with numerous dirty and lewd remarks until it's 2-2 again.

After that, neither of you manages to score another point. Both of you are always close, but then the other can block again. After 3 minutes of fighting, the ref interrupts.

"Okay, stop! We're going to take a 15-minute break," he calls, and you take a step back. You take a deep breath and then walk quickly to the dressing room.

Your ego is bruised that you let yourself be distracted by such cheap talk in the first place, and secondly, that this stupid fight still isn't over.

With your eyes closed, you stand next to the bench and rub your knuckles, which are cracked from all the attacks. Then you close your eyes and take a deep breath.

"So, what do you say?" you suddenly hear a whisper by your ear, which makes you wince. Of course, you immediately know who it is.

You feel his chest against your back and his hand suddenly resting on your hip. All your muscles tense, and you turn your head in his direction. The hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and again you feel the tension between you.

His hand moves from your hip over your stomach. He starts kissing your neck, and you take a deep breath.

"Is that a yes?" he asks softly, and the vibration of his voice sends goosebumps down your body again.

Then you turn and look into his blue eyes. With the smug smile still on his lips, he looks at you.

"You really think it's that easy?" you whisper after a while.

He puts his hands on your hips again and pulls you closer to him. "I could do more convincing if you want to," he says, kissing your neck again before moving his mouth further down.

He pushes your gi aside a little, giving him more access.

"I don't know if this a good idea," you say, panting, and put your arms around him.

Hawk gives you a gentle squeeze and then looks you in the eye. "I'm not gonna say it is, but..." he starts and then kisses you passionately. His tongue runs over your bottom lip, and you open your mouth to let him in.

Suddenly Hawk's hands were all over your body.

"Jesus, you are so fucking hot!" gasps Hawk against your lips, and you can't help but smirk.

He opens your gi and slides the jacket over your shoulders. His hands are quickly back on your body, exploring your skin. Then his hands move down to your ass, and he grabs it before lifting you so you can wrap your legs around his middle.

Hawk takes a few steps backward and then sits on the bench with you on his lap. Suddenly, you feel his fingers on your waistband and stop him.

"Wait... I won't - I won't go any further, understood," you say, biting your lips. You avert your eyes from Hawk and look down at yourself.

"Hey," he says more gently than you ever expected him to. "It's okay... We don't-" he says, but then a loud tone sounds, and you both look up. "Shit, the fight," he says and looks at you.

You smirk and then get off his lap before putting your gi jacket back on. You then make your way out of the locker room, but just before you reach the door, Hawk grabs you by your wrist and then pushes you against the wall.

"This isn't finished, sweetheart," he whispers before placing his lips on yours and kissing you.

When he lets go of you, you smile softly at him. "I guess that was something that we needed to get out of our system."

"Guess so."

Together, you walk back out to finish your fight.

"All right, let's finish this," the ref says before you bow to each other again, then take your fighting positions.

You wink almost imperceptibly at Hawk as the ref gives the go-ahead for the final round.

30 seconds later, you're lying on your back on the mat with Hawk bent over you. Your chest rises and falls quickly, and you look him in the eye.

"Looks like you didn't hold back this time, huh?" you ask, and Hawk winks again.

"Oh, just wait for the next time; I get you without this Gi," he whispers and then gets off you.

He helps you to your feet, and his friends are already running towards him to celebrate with him for the win. You smile at the sight but then turn away and go to your sensei and friends.

A little later, you are approached again as you stand outside by your car, just loading your bag.

"I meant it."

You turn around, and Hawk is standing in front of you. "What do you mean?"

"That I wanna see you again," Hawk says, and you step closer to him.

"Oh, so that's what that meant," you say with a smile, and he nods with a shoulder shrug.

You walk up to him, take his cell phone out of his hand, and put in your number. Then you open your car and get in. Before you close the door, however, you look again at Hawk.

"I really enjoyed your company too, Eli."

Then you get in and drive away. Hawk looks after you and, at that moment, realizes that you called him Eli. The question, however, was how you knew his real name.

[soysauceharry]

after the end - a blurb

got the writing bug again :) enjoy! (gif credit to @londonharry)

There is something to be said about the quiet that ensues after being surrounded by noise. It's different. It's an absence of sound that feels heavy, imbued with some kind of meaning that's hard to make sense of. But it's important.

Harry feels this as he sits in his dressing room, the last of the roaring crowd from Lisbon trickles out of the stadium. Leaning down to untie his shoes, he grins to himself when he catches a whiff of the beer still lingering on his chest. He tosses his shoes aside. His sweats are hanging on the clothing rack, waiting to be worn after his obligatory ice bath. But before getting up, before moving to do anything at all, Harry sits. He leans back. He closes his eyes, and he breathes.

You're usually waiting for him in his dressing room if you come to the shows, but usually it's the hotel or the car if you're traveling overnight to the next destination. Tonight, you linger in the halls backstage, trying to hang on to as much of the chaotic, contagious energy that permeated the building. Crew members stop you occasionally to say hello. One of the security guards gives you a wink as you reach Harry's door, and you smile warmly before pushing your way in.

Harry doesn't move when you shut the door behind you. "Beer fountain, hm?" you say quietly.

"Mmhmm." He cracks one eye open. "Something like that."

"Whose was it?"

"Dunno. Lloyd's, maybe." His arm extends along the back of the couch as you approach. "Thought it was funny."

He's regarding you through his lashes, peering through squinted eyes. The fatigue is apparent, but you know there's adrenaline shining in the background. His voice is tired, body probably starting to feel the beginnings of soreness from dancing around stage for hours. Still in his stage clothes, he sits like he hasn't just performed to tens of thousands of devoted attendees. Like he hasn't just shined so bright that space dwellers would be blinded.

"You're a menace, you know," you chide, curling up next to him with your legs tucked under you. As quickly as you lean in, you lean back right away. "Oh, god." Your nose wrinkles. "You smell ripe."

"I've only just come off stage."

"Yes, but--" you make a vague gesture toward his chest. "Post-show Harry smell is my favorite. Not when it's mixed with beer."

It's enough to make him laugh quietly as he pulls you in, but he doesn't say anything else. You let yourself rest against him, arm going around his shoulders to toy with the fabric of his vest. His hand rests casually across your legs. A less than graceful bump of his forehead against yours communicates his silent request, and you smile into the soft kiss he gives you. He tastes like the last dredges of adrenaline at the bottom of a coffee cup.

A deep sigh against your lips, then he pulls away. "C'mon, then."

"What?"

"Ice bath with me."

You scrunch your nose, digging your nails into his shoulder absently. "Nice joke."

"M'serious. You've never done one."

He is serious. No hint of sarcasm stains his words as he gazes at you prettily, the post-show haze evidently kicking in. "I kind of planned to keep it that way," you say lightly.

But if there's one thing about Harry--his determination is unwavering. He squeezes your thigh once, twice. Again, taking his time to release it. "Let's do it," he whispers like it's some huge secret. "Just five minutes. You can do it."

It's not that you can't. But your own post-show routine involves letting Harry release the last of his energy on you back in your hotel room. A treat that likely won't happen tonight, given Harry's sleep-heavy lids already half-closed as he grins. He doesn't let you reply before he's pulling you off the couch and toward the bathroom.

It's there already, set up and standing proud like a throne waiting for its king. A quick dunk is usually all Harry needs to shock his system, to soothe his body after the effort he goes through while performing. Scientifically sound, but horribly masochistic. To you, at least.

"No part of this is particularly appealing." You contradict your words as you start undressing. Harry's already got his vest off, standing eerily still in just his sequined pants as he watches you strip.

"But you love me, so you'll do it."

"I guess I do." You give him a sardonic smile. "Wonder why I thought that was a good idea."

He rewards you with a pinch to your hip. Soon enough, you're at one end of the tub and he's at the other, both clad in just your underwear. The cold air from the ice wafts toward you, pebbling your skin. It's going to be awful. Harry braces his hands on the edge of the tub; you do the same.

"Three... two--c'mon, babe." He's laughing through his words as your face gets more and more unpleasant while he counts down. "Two... two... one!"

A splash. Horrible, horrible cold.

"Fuck! Oh, fuck me."

You're panting shallowly, clearly becoming unregulated as your body adjusts. Or, attempts to; this all but confirms Harry is a freak of nature. He's panting too, but through practiced technique--lips pursed, he makes little gasping noises through a smirk that warms you slightly. You find yourself mimicking him automatically, crossing your arms against your body like he has.

"This is stupid, H."

"You're doing so good," he laughs, ignoring your obvious discomfort. "Just a little bit longer."

You're laughing too, and it's partially because this is ridiculous, the two of your squished together in this ice bath in his dressing room in Portugal.

You try not to move to prevent little crashes of cold penetrating through the layer of pseudo-warmth your body has created. After a few moments, your breathing normalizes slightly, the tension loosening from your shoulders. "When is this supposed to feel good?" you ask.

He contemplates the question. "After we get out."

"Ah. Naturally."

"Should we start doing this at home?"

"Mmm. I think we keep this as a tour staple."

He huffs a laugh, shifting to extend one leg out in the tub. His calf brushes your ankle, and you wiggle your toes in response. "That means only one more, then. One more show, one more bath."

That's right. Just Italy left, then a little vacation for the two of you. This tour, this whirlwind of a few years, feels like it's going to culminate in something special. Tonight was just a taster--you both knew that. Italy would be a different beast entirely.

"Maybe I'll join you for that one, too."

Harry pushes his foot against your leg, a secret smile shared between the two of you. A promise.

[crash-bump-bring-the-whump]

Whumptober 2024 - Day 16

Danger!! Poison!! Orcs!! Magical tech!! We have it all today!!

TWs: poison, someone shot by an arrow, near-death experience

Necrosis | Swamp | Wound Cleaning | “No, I can’t feel anything.”

"Tell me when you stop feeling him." Manuel said, one knee pinning Mariano's shoulder as he withdrew the injector from his arm.

Bastian nodded, heart hammering in his chest as Mariano lay in the grass, already breathing harder and looking pained. Fire nipped at their bond, chewing on it like a scavenging rat. The arrow in Mariano's side was a parting gift from a Loyalist who hadn't appreciated his kingslaying activities.

It stunk of far too many poisons to be reasonable.

It was lucky that they'd stopped by In The Shadow Of Snow so recently--the orcs that studied there had far more advanced crystaltech when it came to internal medicine than anywhere else.

It was the only way to force enough pact dampening potion into Mariano's system quickly enough to buy them more time. Mariano's eyes looked up at both Bastian and Manuel, suddenly full of terror as it started to take hold of him. "Hey, no, this is normal. This is just a dampener to slow your heart down, remember?" Manuel said, gripping the shaft of the arrow still lodged in Mariano's side. "You bought it a month ago, in that market with all the old fountains. You're just going to take a nap."

"Yeah, yeah." Bastian said, holding Mariano's free hand tight. "We won't let you die, that's why we're doing this. The nearest town's a few hours away by flight."

Mariano swallowed hard, trying to speak. Bastian felt the echoes of how the poisons burned, how mortal terror rippled through their pact. "I'll wake up?"

Manuel ripped the arrow free, wrenching a clipped shout from the mage beneath him. "You will." He looked down at Mariano, meeting his eyes. "You remember how good I was back then, right? As long as they had a pulse, I could bring anyone back?"

Mariano nodded, eyes already drooping down to half-mast. Bastian felt his pulse slowing steadily, every beat significantly slower than the last. "You could...yes. And this isn't the poison. This is...the potion..."

"That's right. You killing the king didn't change my magic." Manuel said. He smiled again, and Bastian watched the bleeding from the arrow wound start to slow significantly. Manuel was always so confident when he was being a doctor--it was like looking at a different person entirely. "And what I gave you will make sure you still have a heartbeat for me to work with later."

Mariano nodded again, mumbling something vague as his eyes slid shut. All at once, with a soft sigh, Bastian felt their pact close off. His heart felt like it was made of ice.

"I can't feel him anymore." Bastian said, feeling for their pact bond. "No...I can't feel anything."

Manuel's fingers darted to Mariano's throat. He pressed in gently, only relaxing after a few seconds. "Good. Good, it's working. We bought him a lot more time." Manuel started packing his things away, wrapping the bloodied arrow in some spare cloth. "Come on, I'll get him bandaged on the way. We need to go."

Bastian swallowed hard and started shrugging out of his backpack straps. "Yeah. Yeah, back to In The Shadow Of Snow? Bet they'd have stuff to help."

"Exactly. Fly as hard as you can and we'll get there with plenty of time to spare." Manuel said, already shouldering the rest of their bags.

Bastian shifted, bones elongating and scales rippling over his body. His front paws hit the grass with an earth-shaking thud, and he reached around to carefully snag Mariano by his shirt while Manuel scrambled onto his back. When Mariano was secure in Manuel's arms, Bastian heard Manuel trill.

With a powerful leap and a flap of his wings, Bastian exploded into the sky with a roar. He caught the wind, sailing straight back to the little mountain town that had already given them hope to save their mage. All they needed to do was get there before the pact dampeners wore off.

And so Bastian would.

@whump-captain @whumpr @whumperofworlds @lektricwhump @cyberwhumper

@bxtterflystxtches @inscrutable-shadow @whumpbees @painful-pooch

[izzyspussy]

fic where Jamie does something that will piss his dad off (not hard to do) and it ends up in the public eye somehow. maybe it started that way and Jamie just wasn't thinking it through at the time - or he was and decided to do it anyway, or maybe somebody was supposed to keep their mouth shut and didn't, or maybe it's another data breach, but whatever it is it gets out and it gets in the news cycle.

and maybe Jamie thought he was handling it okay but then suddenly wasn't, or maybe he found out his laundry was being aired at training like the lads all found out about it happening to Keeley. regardless, he ends up rushing into the managers' office - the closest room with a semblance of privacy, despite being occupied - to have a brief but spectacular panic attack about it.

because it just happens to be something his dad is not going to let slide, something he won't be satisfied yelling at Jamie over the phone about. he's gonna come around to show Jamie by hand exactly how he feels about it.

when the coaches question him, Jamie gives the barest bones explanation he can manage. this is what came out, if you haven't heard, and I'm freaking out because my dad is gonna want to teach me a lesson about it.

"So what you're saying is you need a place to stay," Roy says. Not a question. An offer, actually, if you speak Kentese. But Jamie shakes his head resignedly.

"No," he sighs bitterly. "Probably'll need a day or two off training, though."

There's a long, horrible pause - a pause where Beard gets exactly what Jamie means and Ted and Roy want so bad not to that they don't.

"Let me see if I have this right," Beard says, more to force the issue on the other two than because he himself needs any clarification - or because he has the faintest pipe dream that spelling it out will make Jamie change his mind. "You're planning to take a beating?"

Bitter, still bitter, Jamie says, "He don't fucking give up more than I do. Let him get it out of his system, then it's over."

There's another pause - Beard doesn't know what to say to that - before Roy asks, "What if he lost?"

"Lost...?" Jamie repeats.

"To you," Roy explains. "You're saying if he shows up your house and you're not there he'll just keep coming round, yeah? What if he shows up and you beat his arse into the fucking ground like he deserves. Would he still come back then?"

"Self-defense," Beard assures no one in particular.

But Jamie shakes his head again, this time quick and jerky. "I can't-" he says. He throws a nervous, furtive look at Ted.

"He can fucking be wrong sometimes, Jamie," Roy snaps - gently, for Roy - catching on quick.

Jamie doesn't answer, but Ted himself nods. He says, calm as a cucumber, "I can't agree with the rest, but that part sure is true."

"You can," Beard tells Jamie. Also gently - for Beard. Jamie's mouth twists miserably.

"Yeah," he finally agrees. "But I fucking won't, will I?"

"You only think that because you haven't yet," Beard insists.

"That actually ain't true," Ted points out, carefully cheerful. "I didn't see much else after," he shifts uncomfortably, a bit guilty, "but you put that man on his back in Wembley."

"...Are you encouraging this?" Jamie asks him, too confused to be aghast. Ted leans forward on his desk to regard Jamie with a serious, slightly self-deprecating smile.

"Well, it's like Roy said, I can be wrong sometimes," he says. "And these two fellas seem to think this is one of those times. Now, they both wouldn't be here if I didn't trust their judgement." He sits back then, softly tosses up his hands, smiles a little wider. "So I'll keep my wrong opinion to myself."

Jamie huffs a small, genuine but still slightly unsure laugh at that. He hesitates for a moment longer, but then he squares up his shoulders and lifts his chin and turns to Roy.

"No," he says. "No, he wouldn't come back if I did that."

[berrypass-de-murdler]

2 - 33 Gambling and Murder Are Both Illegal

AGH MY BOOK WON'T COME TIL TOMORROW WHY

Obviously I haven't been posting them because that's kind of a waste of time, but I've digitized quite a few of the murdlers' official artworks!

They're not beautiful, but they are convenient when I need basic transparent pictures of them.

I mean.... yes!!!!!!!

DON'T READ THE EPISODES WITHOUT READING THE BOOKS!!

Logico looks through his mail. He finds a scrap of paper with an invitation to an underground gambling ring written in blood! He and Tino laugh their asses off for a while.

IRRATINO: So are we gonna go? LOGICO: I mean, I was cordially invited. IRRATINO: And I’ve devised a system for winning at poker! LOGICO: Yes, esoteric gambling. IRRATINO: I swear it works!!

They enter through a manhole in the alley. The tables are set up in the sewers! Silverton the Legend and Boss Charcoal were also invited. (They left Drakonia as soon as the Lady Violet news got out.) And, of course, the twins.

BLUES: [with a ridiculous fake mustache] Welcome, welcome. It’s time for gambling time. Come get your cards and lose money. (Let’s get a beer.) Yeahh.

Irratino gleefully plays some rounds with the gang, and loses so much money. But he seems to be having fun, so it’s fine. 

LOGICO: Except that’s MY money too…

He’s more interested in the fact that there’s a human pinned to the wall (good god!!). That’d scar any sane person for life!

LOGICO: Um, hello! IRRATINO: Huh? [goat scream]

They have to solve this extremely gruesome murder! Who would have thought there’d be shifty figures in a sewer gambling operation? 

IRRATINO: All right, Logico. First things first, you need to FULLY learn numerological code. LOGICO: NO I DON’T! IRRATINO: Really? Then how else are you going to decode this clue? 

It’s made out of numbers. Clearly he wrote it, and is just trying to taunt Logico. 

LOGICO: JUST TELL ME THE CLUE YOU IDIOT IRRATINO: This is a learning opportunity!

Logico has no choice but to sit down and let Irratino teach him the way, when there are far more important things he could be doing. In the example, Tino uses a short name for reference: ‘Red’. Logico grows deeply uncomfortable once again. He wants to forget that awful trip ever happened!

LOGICO: I get it now. Please stop.

Irratino is distressed by the sudden change in mood, and decides to take statements for him. Charcoal is walking very funny, for one.

IRRATINO: Say, um… what’s… what’s up? CHARCOAL: N-Nothing!

Tino notices that it’s his left arm that’s hindering him, and that he’s wearing a jacket when he usually doesn’t. He brings out a pipe from under his sleeve!

IRRATINO: Aha!

Charcoal falls over.

CHARCOAL: NOOO!! I HAD TO HAVE THAT ‘CUZ I BROKE MY ARM!!!  IRRATINO: OH MY GOD! OH NO, I’M SO SORRY

Charcoal sobs in pain. Irratino tries to put it back but makes it worse.

SILVERTON: Real charming guy you bagged there, Logico.

Logico tries to whack him, but there’s not much use against the glob of slime. He turns to the Blues instead.

BLUES: We, I mean I, know this: a shoe knife was at the cashier! LOGICO: A… ‘shoe knife’? BLUES: Yuh-huh. LOGICO: And what, may I ask, is a shoe knife. BLUES: Wha- duh!! It’s a shoe knife! You’re not a real adult so you don’t understand, short man! LOGICO: I am not short! I am just very compact.

Logico just has to wait out the answer for this one - as the Blues struggle to stand straight, a knife pops out of one of their giant boots!

BLUES: (I told you the boots were a terrible idea!!) LOGICO: I think you’re too young to gamble. BLUES: NO I’M NOT! I’m a grown man!

Logico opens their coat.

BLUES: I’m STILL a grown man! This is just my mistress! (Your WHAT?!) Shut up and carry me! [Pink throws her to the ground] [Blue screams] I want my mom! (She’s not coming! Dad MURDERED her!)

Logico and Irratino wince at the turn this is taking. 

LOGICO: Why not we take you home.

Logico carries one kid piggyback and Irratino holds the other as they head back into town where they belong.

The end! 

This gets really really bad when you remember that their dad is Mayor Honey

The power of Goat Lord compels you!

See you next time murdlers!

[midwinterwings]

Divinemadnesscore (and a small vent. Tw suicide and sh mentions)

Accepting my divinity has always been the hardest for me, as opposed to discovering myself. Having been trained to deal with 'problems' or things that cause 'bad things' like stress or anxiety by shutting it down, that's what I tried to do.

but, this artwork, a self portrait, aka, what it feels and looks like being me, is a physical way of asserting that I'm done doing that. I'm done hurting myself, biting my own heads to force them down, to try to squeeze myself into a box that never would have fit anyway. My divinity is something (and I had to refrain from saying unfortunately) that impacts my mortal life a lot. The more I try to surpress it the more it gets angrier and pushier, demanding to be seen.

I have to admit, a big reason I've finally realized what I have to do is to simply let me be, is because I realized that if I continued down the path of suppressing something so big, I would kill myself. I remember when a member of the system, Lilian, would be violent and want to kill himself if he fronted, because the rest of us ignored him and tried to murder him, seeing that he was a dark stain, the evidence of our past we hated.

But no one really wants to die. To Lilian, it felt like a triumph. Hurting us, and himself, to show he existed. When we accepted him (which was a hard and painful process on its own, due to his distrust in us. I mean we did try to murder him repeatedly I get it) he saw no need to hurt us. Why would he?

In the same way, the way my mortal self bites and chews at my divinity sends a deep pain through both of us. All we do is bite and hurt ourselves and the pain makes us angrier and hate each other more. But I'm done with this.

Its terrifying, letting myself be. I've glimpsed what I am, and it's horrifying, beautiful, eldritch. But that dosent stop me. It'll be awkward, unlearning all the ways I hurt myself to make sure I stay in my lane. I've lived this life hacking and killing so much of me, mentally, physically and spiritually, I dont know what it feels like to not bleed, to just be, to not run and jump onto the altar, lie down and plunge my blade into my stomach before anyone else has a chance to. I'm done pulling out my own flight feathers before they can be clipped. The ones who used to clip my wings forgot I had those. Seeing they didn't like them, I took it to myself to pull them out. So many times I've done this they've forgotten I grew flight feathers. And I forgot I grew flight feathers, seeing plucking at my sore, bloody wings as a daily chore, no more upsetting than doing the laundry. I set inhibitors on my mind, shut my mouth, so that people I knew could live in ignorance, unchallenged, unaware a small child could read them front to back like a book. Their little secrets, hidden insecurities, I blinded myself, I wouldn't let myself see or look or be anything other than normal. I slowed my thoughts, and split off into my mind, creating realms to busy myself, so that I ran at the normal times, so no one could tell. Instead of blurting out things people didn't like to hear, I swallowed honey so that my tongue was sickly sweet.

no longer. If this ends up a mess I'll face them with all of me, my wings healed. My body is scarred and beaten and crippled, my mind tired and soggy, my soul bleeding, filled with holes and claw marks from my own constant assaults on myself. But even as the flight feathers that grow shall be flimsy, sprouting between scar tissue from years of plucking, they are my feathers, my wings, my goddamn life. It won't be the same - of course it won't. The long, sturdy flight feathers that used to sprout now small, easily broken, flimsy. That's OK. Theyre my flimsy feathers.

[yandere-collections]

Since the first post about it, I am now eternally rotating Yandere Town in my mind. Lately it’s imagining how the townspeople would react if the reader was a complete recluse. There’d be clandestine watchtowers in place with a view of the readers home, and any time they left people got some equivalent of an amber alert that their darling is out and about, so be on your best behavior! Everyone working double time to make every second count should they encounter the reader, tripping over themselves to try and make enough of an impression that they just might come out more often.

The more desperate folks get dressed in blue collar outfits and pass themselves off as inspectors who “just need to take a quick look around, make sure everything’s in order.” The reader is equal parts relieved that the town takes citizen safety so seriously and confused as to why five people have showed up in the last three days, not to mention that they seem more interested in chatting than doing any work. The local government cracks down on that pretty quickly, but a few people still slip through the cracks.

Once they all get some idea of what the reader enjoys, the events going on in town get weirdly specific. Checked out a lot of horror books at the library? Big horror movie night in the gym! Spotted shopping around the farmers market? Time for the local festival with plenty of fresh pies and homemade treats! Frequently stop by a certain restaurant? What do you know, they actually throw this big feast in town every year! Crazy how it just happens to fall on the readers birthday, huh? They wouldn’t want to miss it, would they?

And since I’m a big fan of darlings who can read between the lines, the reader catching on that people are acting weird and leaving the house even less than they did when they first arrived, and turning away any unexpected visitors, even if they really are there to check on the house. Unrest sweeping through the streets because nobody’s seen them for the past month, and the leaders have to resort to drastic measures to keep the peace. The fireman chalk up the destruction of the readers entire house to be a horrible case of flawed wiring, they really should’ve let someone check that out. Nowhere to stay? Don’t be silly! Anyone in town would be happy to take them in until they have somewhere new to stay. It’s a close knit town, so expect plenty of guests! Surely the reader won’t mind, they can’t dictate such things in someone else’s home, right? :)

(Apologies for the long-ish ask, it’s just been rotting my brain and I needed to get it all out of my system. Love the stories, love you, have a wonderful day.)

YES YES YES!!! You have reached into my mind and took my exact thoughts to the point where I don't actually have much to add to this.

I definitely think being a recluse would lead to more yanderes invading your privacy, ironically enough. If they can't come in for inspections, your "neighbors" offer to renovate and maintain your home. New paint, gardening, one of them even offered to start digging a hole in your backyard to put in a pool (no ulterior motives here! they totally aren't hoping to catch you in a bathing suit on the dozens of cameras surrounding your house). While you may be missing some things and you're pretty sure you have less locks on your windows now, you can't deny how much nicer the house looks. Hopefully you don't get too attached because, like you said, something bad may happen if you spend too much time inside. They won't resort to burning it down unless they're really desperate. Most of the time, a burst sewer line or power outage is enough. Maybe the utility company will shut off your water, forcing you to stay at a friend's for a while.

Never apologize for long asks! It's a genuine delight to see how excited people get about my writing <3