#I need this chess set to complete my aesthetic

[godzilla-reads]

I desperately want a pewter dragon chess set- THE pewter dragon chess set I’ve seen at the MN RenFest every year.

They raffle it off unless someone can buy it for the $1,200 price tag.

[box-dwelling]

OK so I am like a day past completing the Ansur dungeon and it's been enough time to let my thoughts on it settle. Spoilers ahead.

For context, first playthrough with a basic tav. I'm a good way through act three and have finished a few of the pc quest lines. Minsc, Jaheria and Astarion are done. I have yet to get the hammer or do the house of grief but I have done sorcerers sundries. Also I haven't refused Ulder yet but it like the next thing I'm doing. Other context is that dnd is a huge special interest of mine. I've been playing for about 7 years straight. Both dming and as pcs and I have played under professional dms before. This does affect how I view the game but it's mostly postively.

Disclaimer, I haven't finished the game so there may be some stuff that ends up being done that I just haven't seen but the quest line says it's over and from what I've read online it doesn't seem like that's the case so.

So let's start off with the pros because I honestly have less to say there

As a dm I can and always do look at the dungeon design. Larian is genuinely really really good at this, and this dungeon is no exception. I loved the puzzles though a few could use some tweaking. They arent all great. But there's ideas there that I will probably introduce in my games some time. A chess puzzle especially is such a great idea. That was so cool and the fact bring gale along means you can get the answer free I'd you don't play chess makes perfect sense. Genuinely great.

I also liked the visual design. I had expected the appearance to be what I was starting to dub in my head as the "character development dungeon aesthetic " given that really in terms of design and function cazadors dungeon, the gauntlet of shar and the sorcerers sundries vaults are very very similar. But this one wasn't and I'm very happy about that. Give me some variety.

The Ansur fight itself, AMAZING. Great boss battle. I loved the hell out of it. I'd have to dig into the code to properly tell but it looked like they used a varient of the colossus fighting rules which while I've actually never run but I have been at tables where it has been run to incredible effect. They're good rules. I'm glad to see them used. It honestly makes me consider running them myself.

Last pro, on the face of it, I like the idea. I like the concept of wylls character development dungeon being about learning about the tenants of being a hero from one he looked up to. That tracks. It's a good place to take his charcater at least in theory.

As for the cons, it's mostly one but it's also a big one that has majorly pissed me off. Because Wyll is in my joint top 3 for favourite characters and they did him so fucking dirty.

I really really hated how they handled the twist with the Emperor. I don't dislike him as a charcater but I think it's at least to me pretty unambiguous that he's a pretty shady and morally grey charcater. Which is fine. In fact, it's actually a pretty interesting way to take Wyll's arc. That he looked up to this hero, internalised his mindset through the chambers and then learns that he was actually a pretty shady morally complex figure that doesn't live up to wylls expectation, that is a GOLD mine of character development. That is absolutely fascinating. Except, it doesn't do that. He barely even comments on it. Just says he's forged into a new hero by the trials while ignoring the person who set them is the very shady figure who has honestly fucked us over a lot.

You know who's another hero wyll probably looked up to? Minsc! And the Emperor is a real fucking bitch about letting him join the party.

This is compounded by the fact his good/bad ending choice rather than being a slow build up like everyone else where they get tempted by power and then have to turn it away, he instead just says "hey I could become grand duke" out of no where and then doesn't even need a persuasion check to get talked out of it like everyone else does.

So, I would be remiss without giving a way I'd fix it. So here is that.

Th ansur dungeon isn't given to us by florrick in the lower city. It's given somewhere else before you get there.

I'd recommend like, it being in a book or something in Wyrms crossing. The location is tied to wyll anyway. Maybe add in his childhood bedroom that he asks to go visit. You can put in some environmental storytelling telling that can expand on his complicated relationship ulder. Maybe the room is bordered up and untouched but when you get inside there evidence of genuine love.

When you get there you get the story of ansurs legend and wyll becomes obsessed with using this as a way to help save the city.

The ansur dungeon then gets basically left untouched. Twist and all.

But at the end of it, rather than just deciding he's going to become grand duke, it becomes a question. He can't become grand duke while Ulder is alive. And Bauldrian the great adventurer became a politician after wards. Give the Emperor a reason to not want ulder alive. Maybe Ulder risks not being able to defeat the elder brain in some way, and tie it into his reaction to Wyll taking a deal with Mizora.

Wyll is now conflicted. If his father dies he can carry on in both his and Bauldrans footsteps. Ulder left his child in command of an army before he was an adult. Can he really be trusted to take care of the city? Of course wyll loves him and of course wyll wants to save him but there's that doubt there. I have been reforged in to bauldarns heir. I could do a better job. I could save more people. He abandoned me. Why should I save him? If he breaks his pact this is also fed into by the fact it puts him at very active threat from mizora. It's not that prevelant. Wyll is wyll he's not that susceptible to corruption but a little bit of doubt, coaxed on by the Emperor is all he needs.

Then the lower city.

Make sure you have to get minsc before continuing his quest line. Have wyll have a reaction to the Emperor 's distrust of minsc. These are two of his childhood hero's fighting. Play that up for some drama.

Then saving ulder becomes the thing that either makes him the blade of avernus or the grand duke. He can either choose to not save his father, take on the title of grand duke and rule the city following in baulderans footsteps or, he can kill mizora and swear his life to killing demons as a the blade of avernus. . Later becoming a ranger just like minsc. Even give minsc a few lines giving him a pep talk about it. Maybe even having him explain that wyll need to be his own kind of hero taking the infulances he has from the past and learning from them to become a better one. If the pact stays he just remains the blade of the frontiers if he saves ulder but can become grand duke if he doesnt.

Then, have ulder apologise and then reconcile. Have wyll learn to actually recognise his father as a flawed man who hurt him but who is also complex. Maybe even have an option for if he chooses to fully reconnect their relationship or not.

The bones of a really really really good story are here. Please, for the love of God, larian actually tell it.

[theultimatenonbinarynerd]

New Who Kid Watches Classic Who: Genesis Of The Daleks

Introduction

Classic Who is something I owe a lot too even though I have never seen it. Without Classic Who my Grandma never would have gotten my Mum into Doctor Who and without my Mum getting into Doctor Who I never would have become obsessed with New Who. Its a generational cycle in my family that only my brother has broken.

With all of Classic Who being put on BBC I Player well most of it. (I'm gutted about an unearthly child) I decided it was time to get into the era that thrived my Grandma (Rip) and Mum's love for scifi. But before I started from the beginning there were three episodes I knew I needed to check out, let's say they were for lore curiosities sake. The TV Movie, Genesis Of The Daleks and The Five Doctor's. I'll share my thoughts on The TV Movie and The Five Doctor's in separate blogs, for now I gotta talk about Genesis Of The Daleks. It's gonna take me a white to get use to the 6 part stories and dramatic cliffhangers but I'm willing to give it a chance.

Okay I will say as a disabled person I see what Russell T Davies means but he needs to rewatch this episode as The Disabled Villian trope becomes worse if the character is motivated by their disability Davros isn't. I completely understand the thoughts though I just hope that skit was non cannon or an alternate universe and they treat him with respect. He was a manipulative menace in this episode and its pretty ironic that in the end he got out manipulated. I hope his other appearances are just as good and they explain his survival well.

What I Liked

There's a lot I loved throughout this six parter it was very tense and climatic. I also thought our tardis team of The Doctor, Sarah Jane and Harry Sullivan worked together masterfully. Whilst The Ponds reminded me of A Married Couple Babysitting their goofy Son, These three reminded me of Two Siblings trying to keep up with their Older Wise But Mad Sibling. It's the first time I've seen Sarah with a Doctor other than 10 and 11 and they work together beautifully.

Firstly I have to praise the incredible cinematography. Man the shots despite this episode being filmed so long ago are absolutely beautiful even on a wide screen TV. The angled shadowy shots of the Daleks are really menacing and it adds to the dark tone of the story as it is. All the settings including the clean white aesthetic of the karld labs create a deeply unsettling feeling in your stomach. I also think the cuts to Davros make you very uneasy as well, his introduction and reveal was absolutely magnificent.

Secondly I have to praise the incredible themes and philosophy incoperated into this story. Toxic Fans like to scream and yell at Moden Doctor Who calling it woke when it always has been. Terry Nation crafted a really good story about the ethics of war and genocide even if you know that the very think you plan to stop might become an earth shattering unempathetic killer. It was very heartbreaking but seeing all the karld scientists wiped out by the Daleks was so important to include as it shows the deep juxtaposition between Davros and The Doctor which makes them brilliant rivals. Despite all the Daleks will do The Doctor can't bare to initiate a genocide of them in their earliest form, a mistakes that will haunt The Doctor's character for many years to come. Whilst Davros would happily kill his own men and play a Palpatine chess like game between The Karld's and The Tharls just for the survival of his creation. Its a story with very important messages and themes that the audience need to evolve. Its also a bold one as we finally get to see the orgins of The Daleks and why they are so Heartless. My mum pointed out but I already knew that the Daleks are definitely a metaphor for a certain group in World War 2. The Cybermen too you could argue.

Finally I have to praise the high stakes and thrills. My mum stared at my gasps and started laughing when I said that Classic Who seems to be more of a blood bath than the New Series. I know Bad Wolf and Parting Of The Ways was brutal but this story is just on a whole other level. As well as laughing with me she did hold my hand too I was absolutely heartbroken at some of the deaths and was routing for The Doctor, Harry And Sarah to survive and over come everything. Not to mention the cliffhangers showing this deep danger are characters were in. I was glued to my seat anticipating what might happen next. Nobody was safe and I definitely felt for all the characters that fell to The Daleks peril. This story is definitely worth it for The High Stakes alone.

What I Disliked

Okay so it might be because it's early days of me watching but I didn't like the cliffhangers as they felt disruptive to the flow of the story and very repetitive as half of the cliffhangers were are tardis team in peril or being kidnapped. My mum saids its just the fever of being a new who baby and that it was exciting at the time but for me it was a bit frustrating.

Secondly I feel like Sarah who was beautifully written in New Who didn't get much too do at all. It feels like she was running around for the sake of it and I would have loved her to play an even bigger role then she did. Whilst Harry got to help The Doctor rescue Sarah I felt like Sarah only got to hang around with other characters for the sake of it. I loved Elizabeth Sladen and will forever miss her so I want to see more awesome moments with a younger Sarah.

Conclusion

So those are my first thoughts after watching Genesis Of The Daleks. It was a really good story arc to the point I can tell why it haunted The Doctor so much even in The Time War. Poor Eight especially was haunted by it. I think it still holds up well despite the effects. My mum's right I just gotta lose myself in the story considering it's media that came out during her time. Very invested though. I can see why so many people like Four but like how everyone loves Ten he's probably not gonna be fav Classic Doctor as I tend to route for the underdogs.

Davros is so menacing and I generally can't wait to see his other appearances in Classic Who apart from the one where he's a floating head as I do think that's problematic and it makes me uncomfortable. I seriously admire the boldness of the stories and can see how they've shaped New Who. I hope New Who can make the Daleks as scary as they were in this episode. I miss when the Daleks weren't just a running gag.

I'm gonna definitely be excited when I get back to this Tardis Team. Sarah and Harry are companions that beautifully compliment the 4th Doctor. I really am excited for this journey though as a whole.

This has been Mel with a classic who review over and out.

-Melody-

They/Them

[henrike-does-writing-sometimes]

Last 7 Lines Tag

Third and final tag game, this one a combination. And just like every other time Ive done these tags, I will not listen to the rules <3 

So without furhter ado, @vacantgodling here are a selection of snippets for you, hope you’ll like them !

Maledictus (Book 1 : Translated)

Emilio looked down at the queen piece in hand. Cut from obsidian with what he could only describe as a thunderstorm swirling within. There was a connection, that he couldn't deny. But still, he couldn't fully believe that the Curio had chosen him.

"Tell me," he began, without looking at Ivan, "How did you find the pieces, and how were you so sure they'd chosen you?"

Emilio could make out Ivan's grin from the corner of his eye. "I found them in an antique store in Stockholm a couple of years ago. It did feel odd that they were selling a third of a chess set. Bit you have to agree they're really pretty." he turned to Emilio who gave him a puzzled look. "And what use do you have with a third of a chess set?"

"The aesthetic," Ivan said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "But to answer your second question. I felt a pull the moment I held the box. Almost like they were calling to me. We didn't understand we'd been chosen until I showed the gang when they were at my place one time. When everyone got to hold their piece."

Emilio didn't try to hide his snort. A group of friends all become chosen by powerful curious, what are the odds?

"And now you're here"

"Excuse me?"

Ivan shifted in his position. With his arm on the bench's backrest, he looked at Emilio. "And now you're here. The Queen piece chose you."

"Which means? That I should join your group and do... whatever it is you do?" Ivan shrugged. "If you want to there is no one stopping you."

Emilio shook his head with an unimpressed grin. He handed the piece over to Ivan. "No thank you. You'll have to find someone else." Ivan's gaze never left Emilio’s brown eyes. Completely uninterested in the piece. Completely engulfed in something else. Emilio arched his eyebrow, qmd decided them and there that Ivan Fellin was a mystery he was eager to forget.

"You do as you will." Ivan said at last and reached his hand out to Emilio. But instead of taking the piece he curled Emilio's fingers around it. "But the Curio chose you. That you will have to live with." he stood up and adjusted the color of his jacket before looking back at Emilio.

"You know where you can find me, Emi." with a quick wink, Ivan was gone. And Emilio qas left with his hand tightly wrapped around the chess piece.

'Three conversations,' he thought. 'And you have gotten on my nerves every single time.'

Gammellunden

“Hello there.” Ruben smiled widely and knelt down beside the tomte. He smiled back, tipping his red hat in a silent greeting. “I think this is yours, if I’m not mistaken,” Ruben held out his hand, presenting the small wicker basket. “It’s a little broken, I’m sorry about that.” the tomte waved his hand dismissively and took the basket from Ruben’s palm. He ran his old hand over the snapped straws, sizing up the damage with well-trained eyes. Then, he moved his hands in quick, flowing motions; Tomte sign, given how only small children could hear them speak. 

“An easy fix. Thank you for retrieving it, my boy.” 

“Oh, it was nothing,” Ruben assured. “Is there anything you need help with?”

“No, not this time. But if I may?” the tomte put the basket down and reached for the small leather pouch secured at his hip. Pulling something out, he held his closed fist up to Ruben. The human held his freckled hand out once more, and the tomte placed a small item in the middle of his palm. A closer inspection revealed it to be a seed, shimmering like dew in the early morning sun.

“I’ve heard you've got quite the garden,” the tomte signed. “This one should do well in your collection. Though make sure to keep it in its own pot, the roots tend to get feisty with strangers.”

Ruben giggled, “I will. Thank you!”

To The End

No one ended up being little spoon. Instead they all clung to each other in a massive tangle with Samir in the middle. They lied in silence, way past the strike of midnight. All unsure if they the other’s were still awake. None brave enough to speak up. They simply snuggled up closer. Finding comfort in the way their scents mixed together almost too perfectly. How their slow breathing sung an almost too perfect symphony. 

It was comforting. It always was. And that night comfort was all they needed. Was all it took for their determination and courage to be fueled, almost overflowing. This was what they were fighting for. This is was made it all worth it. Every reset, every trial. If it just meant they could see each other again. Hear their voices, and touch their skins. It would be worth it. And when they’d make it out, they’d be free. To grow and learn to become better. To hear, see and touch more. 

This was it. Their final night.

Neon Lights (Book 2)

Their eyes turned tender, a faint creese forming between their brows.

"I know I haven't been honest. I know you feel hurt by what I've done, I'm not telling you to feel anything else. But please, just this one last time,” they reached their hand out further. “Trust me."

And he did. 

He stood on shaking legs, and ran. Forcing down the pain in his sprained ankle, kept his strides as even as he could- and once he’d made it to the edge, he jumped. Eyes locked on Epsilon he reached out, hanging above the dark pit with his heart in his throat. Hoping, praying, that Epsilon would catch him. And they did. 

“I got you!” their strong grip caught onto his lower arm, pulled him up to the landing. In an instant they'd wrapped their arms around him. André could feel Epsilon trembling, despite the Apex trying to hide it. And André couldn’t claim he was doing any better himself. 

“I got you, kid.” he heard Epsilon say in a hushed voice. Most likely only meant for them to hear. André let out a shaky breath, and returned the Narvartin’s hold. Held them tight as his nerves broke free, and the dread could finally be felt.

His eyes burnt, and before he knew tears were escaping.

"Hey, kid, it's alright," Epsilon said, their thumb drawing gentle circles on his shoulder. "You're safe now, I promise."

"I'm sorry-" André choked, not quite sure what he was apologizing for.

“There’s no need for that.”

Thank you for reading and I wish you the best year to come <3

[dazzlerazz]

13, 16, and 22 please!

Hiya!

13) If they're a mounted unit what would they name their mount?

Not something I thought of, but probably name it after a star in the sky, maybe Yuri's real name by complete accident and it would be brought up in their Hopes supports lol

16) Who could they win an arm wrestle against? A game of darts? A game of chess?

Robin's a magic leaning unit so I don't imagine them to be very physically strong, they could probably take Lorenz and would playfully arm wrestle with Raphael. In darts I think maybe tied with Leonie, and would probably be chess champion, losing only to Byleth

22) How did they decide on their personal/post skip outfit, and was the price or the aesthetic a bigger factor in their decision?

Robin's post ts outfit is more noble-like in Houses, while in Hopes they look more like a robed mercenary. In Houses, Robin followed Edelgard to Enbarr to join her in the fight, they can be recruited in later chapters similar to Lorenz and Ashe if they were part of the player's class originally. While Edelgard doesn't really trust Robin, she keeps them close, Their outfit isn't exactly set in stone because most interacts with them are pre timeskip where everyone wears their uniforms, but it mostly consists of expensive-looking clothes and little bits of armor, pretty much traditional medieval fantasy stuff. It does however possess a lot more color, specifically a darker green that I really liked when I was looking for outfit inspiration a year ago. Their hair is longer and more ragged, they look more tired, and their monocle has a chance to be lost for good

Their outfits are mostly what was thrust upon them by Hubert (I feel like I have pages of notes with their and Hubert's relationship) but they did have a little bit of say in their outfits as they went. They become really finicky about the state of their clothes post timeskip, constantly wanting to sew up the holes and keep it clean

Also: thigh boots, because I said so

I said Robin wears more robes in Hopes, which is true. Their feelings about their clothes and how they obtained them are still the same, except Hubert and Robin have not come to decently respect each other yet. They also need something light and flow-y to easily up and run or hide their face, which is something I have in my notes but I can't remember what I was planning for that :') and also: knee high boots

[gnattyplayssims]

1919 Pt2 - The Soldiers' Return

It wasn't long after Elena and the kids left that Anthony Grieves started coming to the house. "You're right this place does need a lot of work. That wallpaper, these couches, even the fireplace. I bet if we got rid of that shelf and chess table there'd be more room."

Anthony stood and went to stand by the piano, "You know what this corner would be perfect for?" He flipped on the GrammyFone and a gentle jazz beat filled the room. He reached out to pull Marianna into a dance. "Clear away some of the clutter around this place and it's perfect."

Anthony wasted no time in helping Marianna siphon her husbands money into renovations...for a few "favors" She was so distracted she never opened the letter placed on her new vanity so she didn't know that David was on his way home.

"Smell that Uncle? The clean air of home!"

David had hoped to surprise her when he came in early that morning. He had slipped in before the sun rose and went straight upstairs. His blood went cold when he saw his wife in bed. The shock and anger flooded through him and then disappated. He wasn't even all that surprised.

"David!" It was hours later when Marianna finally came down. "You're home!"

"Yes. Has your lover left?"

Mari tensed at his words that left no room for denial." "Oh...yes."

"My brother's chess set and books, his wedding pictures, my mother's cross stitch. Where are they?"

"Well of course I sold them. They didn't fit the aesthetic David. You're a war hero now with a legacy to uphold it was time to let go of the county vibes and embrace the 20th century." David grit his teeth.

"You could have at least waited till I came home."

"It would have only made it harder."

David was barely holding it together "So you didn't think I'd have an opinion about you selling what's left of my brother?"

"Oh don't be a victim, we both know you just put up with Daniel."

"What of his family?"

"Sent them away. Staying with your aunts last I heard."

"WHAT!?"

Daniel didn't wait to hear another word from Marianna. He was out the door before she could protest. A million angry thoughts raged through his mind but only one stuck to the surface: Elena had been thrown out like moldy cheese and he hadn't been there to protect her.

"EEEEEEE! You're finally here!" On the other side of the river Imram was recieving a completely different kind of homecoming. "Have you grown taller?" Imram teased his young wife.

"Just kiss me already"

He threw his arm around her instead. "How bout after dinner. I'm starving"

Elena was sitting on the porch when David finally arrived. "David?"

"Sorry to barge in like this. Mari told me you were here. I...wanted to make sure you were alright."

The tension settled over them like a dark cloud. So many things they wanted to say hanging between them.

Suddenly Elena started to cry and in an instant all the tension evaporated. "No don't cry. Ugh please don't cry. I'm here"

"Everything happened so fast I couldn't think straight and all I've been able to think was that I might lose you too. I wouldn't have been able to bear it"

David pulled her close. "Shhh, I'm here now. I'm not going anywhere."

For a long time he held her as she cried for the marriage she'd never had, for the husband she'd lost, for the fear of being kicked out, and for the man she loved who was alive but still belonged to another.

David held her tighter and let her cry as long as she needed. War changed men when they went to war but he didn't feel much different. It had only made things clearer for him. Nothing else mattered but Elena and he would find a way to be with her if it was the last thing he did.

Despite Imram's teasing he couldn't wait to spend time with his wife. After a big dinner he pulled her away for some privacy. They talked late into the evening until they both fell asleep both sleeping more soundly then they had in the two years they'd been apart.

1920 Pt1 - "You're Married"

[prettytanuki]

Kage no Jitsuryokusha Episode 14

Today is the day we watch. (spoilers below)

Last episode ended in a really badass looking eye cliffhanger, I wonder what sort of insanely cool spell that will unleash this week!

Oh... okay. That's the unsexiest neck kiss I've ever seen.

Effective, nevertheless. After all few would expect the "chest to the blade" technique.

It's called 4D chess, look it up.

You did it, Shinji!

This is the second time I've seen this sort of bullshit villain OP asspull happening. The first was in Shinchou Yuusha (Cautious Hero).

Well, in Cautious Hero it doesn't work because the hero is Cautious enough to prepare for whatever happens 9 steps in the future.

Here it doesn't work because 9 steps in the future Shadow-sama is predetermined to win. How or why doesn't matter. It's an established fact before the fight even starts.

(I don't want Tumblr to ban me so no image lol)

DO YOU THINK ANIME CAMERA ANGLES ARE WEIRD SOMETIMES????????????

Low-level small fry: what artifact is that? High-level rounds: IS THAT SLIME??????

I like that they just throw in these extremely cliched phrases all the time and they know it's just a throwaway cliched phrase so they don't even bother spending two seconds on it just "that's not possible for any human being" and "IMPOSSIBLE! That should have killed you, how are you still alive?" and

It's plot armor's offensive alternative: the plot sword.

Oh yeah, he's gonna do it!

Venomoth?

What, it's a different spell??

No, it's the same one.

He just loves this, doesn't he.

I hate it when they do this sort of scene where a character is disappearing and starts saying something that gets quieter and quieter until only the other character can hear their whisper and the audience isn't allowed to know what they said like it ends in 私を so uh she wants he to do something to her I guess until some episode later something happens and there's a flashback to this scene and she whispers the whole sentence and reveals all the secrets and viewers like me are supposed to be like "OOooooohhhh so that's what she said!"

OH MY GOD HE DIDN'T HEAR IT EITHER!!!!

I hoard all completely useless items I come across in JRPGs and this dude just... vaporizes the key quest item like it's nothing.

Speedrunners, man...

Hahahahahehohofuuhfuhfufhhfoahfoadhfiaçfqp834rhphdfiadfçakn.,fv.xcv.xcvnv

Shall I report my taxes? No need. The gov knows everything.

Shall I confess my sins? No need. The God knows everything.

So many isekai anime about having a "cheat" skill and this is the first one that sounds realistic: moderate knowledge about scientific breakthroughs in a pre-scientific method world.

In fact Shadow doesn't just have a cheat skill, Shadow is the giver of cheat skills considering all the knowledge he "seeded" in his Shadow Garden.

This is the moment you notice Shadow is really just a foster parent for a family of orphans used as test subjects by an evil organization.

And he's the chill parent who is always like "if you want to do that, do it. That's totally fine!"

Delta looks so funny jumping away!

ドＭ = masochistic. ケツ = ass. ハット = hat.

The naming sense of this series is brutal.

I see, so basically because she won the sword tournament or whatever was it called she thinks she's the strongest swordwoman in the world so when she saw Alpha's sword technique, which was in another dimension, she didn't even register that as being a sword technique but an artifact because otherwise she would have to admit she's weaker and she can't have that (Shadow's atomic isn't even a sword technique, I mean come on she does a thing with a sword but that's just for the aesthetic it's pure magic but they're mage knights so technically it's part of the job but

Anyway this is setting it up for her aspirations to be shattered and her turning evil. I completely forgot about it but Shadow also murdered a girl's dad some episodes ago so I don't think all characters (who by coincidence almost all happen to be female) will end up liking him you'll also have some antagonists (who happen to be almost all female by coincidence) too.

At first I thought this was some whip sound related to masochistic asshat but thinking about it again IT'S THAT SOUND OF A TOWEL SLAPPING CID TAUGHT SHOWED HER WITH THE EXCALIBUR ISN'T IT??????

Oh no, drills is too close to becoming more powerful than a human being is allowed to be! Thus her body suddenly got infected by something probably. I wonder if that's the thing that transforms them into Mitties and Shadow is going to save her and she'll become part of the Shadow Garden.

Also who is Omega. Omega sounds really cool as a letter. Hope there's an Omega.

[queenofthefullmoon]

An exhaustive list of Dark Souls 3 bosses I would or would not date

Iudex/Champion Gundyr

We’re starting off this list with a strong yes. Our boy Gundyr has had a hard, difficult life, and he deserves some good company. He’s tall, strong, and I trust him to protect us as we set a lovely camp site outside of the fire link shrine.

Vordt of the Boreal Valley

Vordt is big and he is feral which are truly the only two qualities I look for in a man. Together we’d be unstoppable. I mean, think about how easy it would be to go around with him: just climb on his back and let the rodeo begin, baby. This argument alone should be enough to convince you that Vordt is a suitable boyfriend, but here’s another one: if you get too hot in the summer, worry fucking not for your gigantic man can hold his equally gigantic hammer over you and cover you with snow like an italian man covering his pasta with parmesan.

Cursed Rotted Greatwood

Now while I’m certain it would be a perfect partner for some people, the Cursed Rotted Greatwood isn’t for me. For one, I am not fan of curses, or rot, or weird sticky balls, or strange orange acid, or pale white and slightly viscous hands bursting through a living tree. Secondly, I feel like the crowd of Hollows who group up around the tree would be a big impediment to our intimacy, and I’m not ready to be the mother of 20 Hollows.

Crystal Sage

No offense but you’d be an idiot for not wanting to date the Crystal Sage. All wrapped up in one package, you get a super competent sorcerer bf, who wears the coolest hat in the galaxy and an equally cool cape, and who overall looks like the upgraded version of a plague doctor. In addition to that he also has a pretty rapier so you can both engage in some sparring (which we all know is the most romantic couple activity).

Deacons of the Deep

Probably one of the worst options on the list, they’re all crusty, rotting men moaning around a biggass coffin. There are many technical questions. If I dated a deacon, would I have to date all of them? Can we go out on dates or are they obligated to stay next to the coffin at all times? Can I even date them at all?? Not that I would, because I have standards. The only pro to entering this relationship(s?) would be that I’d probably get one of their robes for free, but the cons are so numerous that I’d rather buy it myself.

Abyss Watchers

Let’s be real and honest even if it hurts. Would I date an Abyss Watcher? Yes. Maybe I’d even date two. However, would an Abyss Watcher date me? No, because they’re all in love with Artorias, and I can’t blame them for that.

Old Demon King

At first I considered dating the Old Demon King like a Russian Instagram model dates an old, rich American man: with a great deal of fake love but above all great patience in order to be the only person on the will. But then I thought about it more, and what does the Old Demon King have to offer, really? A big firework show that will leave him exhausted like the old creature he is, and maybe some pyromancies. Truly, it is not worth it, especially since I’d have to take residence where he lives, in a big old room filled with the corpses of his kin.

High Lord Wolnir

I’ve got nothing against Wolnir personally, but I have no interest in skeletons, nor in his army of skeleton children. As stated above I’m not ready to be a mother. I feel like if we got in an argument and he sighed, he would poison me with his awful breath and I would die a horrible death. Also, living on the brink of the Abyss doesn’t appeal to me that much. However I would like Wolnir to be a good friend I can talk jewelry with because let’s be honest, the man (skeleton?) is blinged the fuck out even in death and I respect that.

Yhorm the Giant

Yes, I would date Yhorm. He was nothing but a sweet, misunderstood giant who always tried to get people to trust him and he convinced me. I would put my life in his big hands. Think of the possibilities. Just like with Vordt he could carry you everywhere but in a less reckless way if you prefer proper manners. You’d never have to worry about not seeing anything at a concert. Also, may I add that waiting for you to show up while sitting on his biggass throne is an absolute power move? Yhorm is a Lord of Cinder, but above all, a Lord of this heart.

Pontiff Sulyvahn

Would I date him because of his appealing aesthetic? Yes. Would I date him for anything else? No. Sulyvahn is absolutely terrifying, completely unhinged in the most frightening way, which is that he doesn’t look bat shit crazy. I could be thinking that everything is going well in our relationship then suddenly he’d lock me in a dungeon then would feed me to his weird friend because I put a fork in the knife drawer. He could pretend to propose and give me a weird fucked up ring with his eye in it and the next thing I know I’d be running in a field on all fours. I don’t trust like that.

Aldritch, Devourer of Gods

I’m so sad about Aldritch because literally everything about him is completely unappealing, unacceptable, unnatural, unholy, abhorrent, but he has the delicate and beautiful face of Gwyndolin. While our lovely Gwyndolin looks gorgeous as ever it doesn’t make up for the fact that Aldritch devoured people and probably wouldn’t find love to be a good reason to not eat his partner. The only reason I can find to have a friendship (not even a romantic relationship) with him is if you really like experimenting with cooking and you really, really need someone to taste your inventions.

Dancer of the Boreal Valley

I feel attraction, which means that just like any other being who feels attraction, I would date the Dancer. She is beautiful, graceful, a bit feral, and would not hesitate to put a flaming knife to my throat, which is the description of my dream woman. Imagine walking the streets with her, trying to hold her hand while it dangles 3 feet above you and she insists on holding her sword, actually, so she might slay anyone who tries to approach you, which she communicates through icy breaths and murmurs. The date of a lifetime.

Oceiros, the Consumed King

Another awful choice on this list, Oceiros is RABID and also, as far as we know, still a married man. You really want to date a man that hasn’t even gone through his divorce but already looks like this? Me neither. I’m already not big on dragon fucking but the fact that he’s all viscous and has weird growths all over him is not helping. Also, he has children, and we know how I feel about that — although, given how he treats them, he probably won’t have kids very soon (too far?).

Ancient Wyvern

So I’ve stated that I’m not very big on dragon fucking. With that said, do I think the wyvern is sexy and beautiful? Absolutely so. You’re probably like « Blue you’re sending mixed signals, are you gonna date the lizard or not? » and to that I say, date? Perhaps not. I would however like to form a lifelong bond with this wonderful force of nature and fight by its side, live a long and fulfilling life travelling along with it, only to die at the same time atop the tallest mountain in the world, where our skeletons will be discovers hundreds of years in the future by brave explorers, who will confirm that the legendary songs that were written about us were in fact not just a myth.

Nameless King

You’ve just read what I said about the wyvern. I feel like the Nameless King really understands me and would respect me for that. We could bond over our love of dragons and other flying scaly beasts and perhaps share some chaste kisses while soaring the sky on our companions. It’s nice to date someone who loves pets as much as you. I feel like he would be a fun guy to hang around in general, maybe he’d let you braid his hair or try on his crown. He can arrange personalized fireworks shows for you with his lightning powers. I don’t think you’d ever be bored around him.  

Dragonslayer Armor

Dating an empty suit of armor has never bothered me (see: ds2 Ruin Sentinels), however I have beef with the dragonslayer armor. Is it a beautiful armor? Perhaps a bit worn off, but the reply remains affirmative. However, it is controlled by Pilgrim Butterflies, which basically means I’m dating one to multiple of these things in the shape of an armor, and I’ve gotta confess that I’m not down for that.

Lorian Older Prince and Lothric Younger Prince

Here comes the delicate moment where we have to make a choice without offending anyone. I personally, speaking for myself, in my own opinion, would rather date Lorian. Reason: he is big, strong, and a bit rabid, which I’ve made very clear is my type. I don’t dislike Lothric, but I feel like we’d be better off as best friends who have a really snarky group chat where we shit talk the entire kingdom. That’s pretty good because if I even just slightly disliked Lothric I’m pretty sure Lorian would sense it and would not hesitate to murder me on sight.

Champion’s Gravetender and Champion Greatwolf

Well the full name is just a formality here, I’m not completely insane so I don’t want to date this rabid wolf. I feel like the Champion’s Gravetender is just a normal dude who’s a bit in over his head and it’s not his fault but he just seems a bit boring compared to all my other options. Instead of a date I think he’d be more of an awkward flirt I had when I was bored and then I came to my senses but didn’t know how to disengage, but in the end it worked out because he was more interested in his work anyway.

Sister Friede and Father Ariandel

Again a choice has to be made and I will have to be predictable and say I’d date Elfriede. Just like Dancer she’s what the woman of my dreams is made of. She’s graceful and could easily take my life and I think it’s awfully sexy of her to be like that. I think I’d be accepted into the family pretty easily, which is important since Father Ariandel cares about Friede so much. I’d go visit him sometimes, play chess with him, bring him his flail, normal interactions with your girlfriend’s dad.

Soul of Cinder

I’m gonna be a tiny bit freaky here and say I’d date the Soul of Cinder. Dating it is just like opening a Kinder Surprise egg, you never know what you’re gonna get (sorry Americans for excluding you here). That makes life exciting and doesn’t let routine stall your relationship. Every day you can wake up with the question « What weapon will my darling walk around with today? The flaming sword, or the sorcery staff? » and be surprised by the answer. Truly ideal, but I understand it’s not for the faint of heart.

Demon Prince

I’m gonna go with a maaaaaaybeeeee? leaning towards no. I mean yes, the Demon Prince is a weird fleshy flaming demon, and that may be a bit gross, but I’ve gotta admit I admire his style, the drama of it all. The care he puts into his entrance, the attitude in his moves. If we don’t date I’d at least want to be friends so he can teach me his ways.

Darkeater Midir

I have very intense and contradictory feelings towards Midir. In one hand, holy shit, absolutely epic dragon, the spirit of companionship is growing in me. On the other hand, this beast is RABID and pretending I could tame him is foolish, and pretentious. I guess in the end the answer remains that I don’t date dragons, I just want to adopt them as my extremely exotic pets.

Halflight, Spear of the Church

Yeah I’d date Halflight, I know it’s the easy answer but look at him. I mean shit he’s walking around like a little thotty with his shirt open and you mean to tell me I’m not supposed to wanna date him because he looks pretty much like a regular dude? My boy Halflight WANTS me to date him or else he would not show up with his tiddies out to a sword fight, which as an activity already has enough erotic implications on its own.

Slave Knight Gael

I’m gonna say it unashamedly and I’ll say it again: I would date Gael. He’s been nothing but helpful and when he tries to attack you it’s to help his little lady that he’s adopted as his niece. We love a chaotic parental figure. Maybe he’s a tad bit old and dirty but there’s nothing a good bath can’t fix and I’m sure he’d appreciate having someone taking care of him for once. Again, he’s got that slightly unhinged quality to him that makes him delightful. When I walk around with my partner I want us to instill both fear and fascination in people which we would be able to accomplish perfectly well.

Dark Souls 1: Remastered date list // Dark Souls 2: Scholar of the First Sin date list

[labellerose-acheron]

The Acheron Cottage -- aka Swynlake’s Burrow

This is a REBOOT of the first in a series that one day may be complete but also may never be complete. As most of you know I’m like a huge #spatial person in my writing, so all my character’s houses/apartments/living spaces are really well mapped out in my brain? And I thought it’d be fun for people to see. (And a good reference for those who may RP in those spaces at some point.) 

And since we just did a whole plot where Hades and Belle renovated their house, I thought I would update their floorplan! (Also, because I’m super obsessed with this magical house.) 

@trip-downtheriverstyx, @lou-bonfightme

Overview:

The Acheron cottage is now a 3 ½ (from 1 ½) bath, 6 bedroom cottage that was built in the 1700s sometime most likely and finished renovations in late June of 2021. Due to the fact the house is now four floors, taller than most of the trees in the area, and most of the surrounding houses are only 2 floor simple farmhouses and cottages, it sticks out a bit in the landscape, not to mention its haphazard leaning-tower of Piza style architecture. The new floors look like they were just kind of slapped onto the original house. (Think the Burrow.) 

It is on 5 acres of land and backs up against the woods. There is a small stable and pasture on the land, as well as a large garden. It’s located in Southwest Swynlake, a few minutes walk from the local stable. There are neighboring farms, but they’re far enough away to not really count as proper neighbors.

Assume that all walls that are not covered by windows or other things (like closets) are full of books. The walls alternate between painted wood paneling and stone. Floors are wood except for the mud room, which are stone. The garden is shown in every photo, in order to orient yourself with which way the rooms are facing. 

Residents: 

Belle Acheron, Hades Acheron, Toulouse Bonfamille, Opal Acheron, Aidan Acheron, Bellamy Acheron, Arthur the ghost, other ghosts, chickens!, Philippe, Angus, the Black Shuck, Victoire, Vincent, Honoré, and Lord Voltaire Scalington, Destroyer of Universes.

**note: pictures in the aesthetic are to give an overall #feel of the house, but don’t necessarily indicate the exact furniture/decorations/floorplan. the floorplan, on the other hand is not quite to scale but i did the best i could.

1. Entryway

When you first walk into the house on your left is a row of hooks (made out of various odds and ends), on which to hang jackets. To your right is a little table and a mirror, probably plants added (thanks, Toulouse.) The hallway is wide but short and opens up into the living room area. The stairs are directly across from the front door. You can also see all the way through into the kitchen from the entryway.

2. Living Room

The living room is the most spacious room in the house and has remained so, even though other parts of the house were expanded. There is a large window seat beneath the front window. Two chairs and a couch are situated near the fireplace, which is dressed in the original brick, these are new pieces of furniture. It was painted a very pale, fading yellow, but now is painted a pale blue. Furniture is cozy and neutral colors (couch is a coffee colour and leather to prevent staining, chairs are a nice maroon colour, picked out by Lou with Hades’ influence). Lots of blankets (because Belle gets cold easily) and books along all the walls. A carpet is laid down beneath the couch/chairs. 

These days, there are a few family portraits in spaces on bookshelves and above the mantel: one from Belle and Hades’ wedding, of the just the two of them and one of the whole wedding party; pictures of the children and with Toulouse, of course. Also, a picture of Belle’s mother has a place of importance among one of the shelves. There is also a picture of Persephone reading with Vincent in her old room. There is also evidence of children: toys and such littered about. It is rarely ever fully clean, no matter how fuitally Hades tries. The living room–as well as the rest of the house–is home to several clocks–on walls, on shelves, etc. Belle’s father was a clockmaker and Belle and him used to fiddle with the broken ones–made them tell time backwards or too fast or only every other hour. Belle and Hades’ chess table moved from the mudroom into the living room, near the fireplace. There is almost always a game in progress.

If one has a keen eye, they will notice there are no logs by the fire, nor soot in the fireplace. Yet, often, an eerie blue fire will be burning in it during the colder months.

3. Kitchen

The kitchen was the room that increased in size the most. The wall where the stove is was knocked out and pushed backwards to shift everything to the left. It now boasts copious counterspace, as well as a large island that is usually cluttered with mail and children’s things. Refrigerator, stove, oven, no dishwasher (which is probably the bane of Hades’ existence since Belle hates doing dishes and Lou doesn’t know how.) Cabinets are cherry wood; some are refurbished, and the new ones were made to match the originals. 

Window over the sink looks out over the horse pasture in the distance (a few meters from the house.) Big, gorgeous window overlooking the garden in the “breakfast nook” area. Dining table is a cherry wood to match the cabinets and has eight matching chairs. Usually, the chairs are pushed to the walls, except for ones that are needed. This room is home to the only clock that is not digital that works in the entire house. It’s on the window ledge above the sink and was the first clock that Belle ever fixed by herself.

4. Mudroom

Where Belle always comes in from her horse rides, the door of which leads out into the garden and beyond. This is where winter clothes are stored and muddy shoes are piled by the door. It has a stone floor and is generally the coldest room in the house. The laundry machine and dryer are in this room. It used to be where Belle and Hades played chess. Now, their chess table can be found in the living room. 

5. Guest Restroom

There is a new bathroom in the mudroom, for guests and the family to use conveniently. (And for Belle to clean up when coming from outside, Hades loves it.) It is just a sink and toilet but it is much better than making everyone go upstairs when they come over.

6. The Garden

The garden was neglected for a long while, since it was Belle’s mother’s. Originally it was full of just rose bushes, but many of them had died due to neglect (whoops). Persephone managed to save a few but the ones that couldn’t be, she and Belle (with the help of Haku) ripped them out and replaced them with different vegetables and flowers. It has a low brick wall around it. It backs up almost right to the woods. It is now Toulouse’s space and he will make it beautiful, with roses and other flowers and different fruits and vegetables. The opening at the top of it leads down to the pastures and off to the right of the garden is where the woods are.

7. Hallway

There is really nothing special about the hallway. It’s actually quite blank. There are more bookshelves though, which used to make the hallway a bit of a tight squeeze but they had to expand the wall in order to include stairs going up to the third floor, so it is more spacious now (though, not by a lot.) 

8. Toulouse’s Room

This room used to be Persephone’s. It is currently Opal’s. However, it will, one day, be Toulouse’s, so I am going to describe that set up. 

As you can see from the floor plan, there are copious amounts of plants in his room. He probably has very nice silky sheets--a dark green, maybe, with green walls. He has a long bookshelf among the far wall. On top of this is Voltaire’s tank. Probably a few paintings hung up and a dresser. The door that looks like it goes to nowhere? Oh, yeah. That’s his ever-expanding magical closet. It is a walk-in and is spelled to expand the more he needs it to. It exists now, but it has a child-proof magic lock on it so that Opal cannot get into it, lol. There is a cat tower for Honoré, though both of the cats hang out in Lou’s room, because Vincent is used to it too bc it used to be Persephone’s room. 

There is a dog bed in the corner for Victoire, though she usually just sleeps with Lou, if Hades isn’t staying the night with him. 

9. Belle’s Room

This room used to be Belle’s, it’s the room she grew up in. However, right now it is currently the twins’ room. However, one day it will go back to being Belle’s, so I am going to describe that set up.

A bit more spacious than the other room (but not by too much) Belle’s room is equipped with a closet, though it isn’t that big, as well as bookshelves all along the walls. There is also a reading nook in one corner with a window seat in it that Maurice built for her (which is why it’s in such a kooky spot) and it is probably Belle’s favourite spot in the whole house (after her secret office). The walls were repainted in a splendid sky blue. Her bedsheets are blue with little flower designs on them. Belle actually doesn’t spend a whole lot of time in her room, except for when she’s getting ready for bed. And I’d say she sleeps in Hades’ room probably 2 nights a week tops, but usually less than that, tbh. 

10. Bathroom

Just your standard bathroom, nothing fancy about it. I assume Belle’s house runs on well water and it takes forever to get warm, which is the bane of everyone’s existence, especially Toulouse. This will mostly be his bathroom in the future, as Belle will take baths and such in the master bathroom.

11. Master Bedroom (Hades’ Room)

Biggest room in the house. It used to be Belle’s parents, and then Belle’s father’s. It has been Hades’ ever since he moved in. It is the neatest in the house because Hades is a tyrant about that and so even Belle’s things must be cleaned up. There’s a bedside drawer on either side of the bed, each has their own matching lamp. I imagine the bedsheets are like, extremely boring actually, like legitimately just white or a pale gray. There is also a space in this room, probably by the window, with arm chairs and a little table, where there is a chess board set up so Belle and Hades can play here too. 

On the main dresser at the top, there is a jewelry stand for Hades’ various necklaces and bracelets. There is also a watch stand. 

The walk-in closet is also extremely neat; Hades has an entire shelf for shoes which is neat of him. 

The door that looks like it goes to nowhere? Oh, yeah. That’s Belle and Hades’ secret office. More on that in the section below. ~~

12. Master Bathroom

This only gets its own shout out because a) it is where Opal was born, b) I wanted the secret office to be #13, lol, c) I have a few headcanons about it. Mostly that Belle still uses it to do most of her nighttime routine stuff, because I feel like her and Hades probably have a groove going at this point and I think it’s cute. Also, she takes a lot of baths, so she’s in there all the time. She gets ready in the hallway bathroom in the morning though, since she gets up before Hades.

It is ALSO very neat, very clean counters lol and there are lots of skin products neatly arranged in drawers. He probably cleans up every morning after Belle from the night before, lmao. (Though, she DOES respect the bathroom as His Space and cleans up after herself, just...not to his standards.)

13. Belle and Hades’ Secret Office

It has a special rune on it that locks it unless you know the way in and can disappear if you want to hide it. Inside, Belle and Hades have hidden some of their more precious artifacts and books, things that they don’t want to get into the wrong hands. 

The tan couch from the living room has been brought up to it, since it was getting far too small for the space downstairs and Belle didn’t want to get rid of it since it held so much sentimental value to them. The window looks out over the garden below, though it doesn’t actually exist to be looking out into the garden. From the outside, you cannot see it at all. It simply doesn’t exist. 

Most everything in it is new. There is a lovely circular oak table in the middle, with matching chairs, and bookshelves surrounding all available walls. The desk labeled A is Hades and the desk labeled B is Belle’s, and they are both oak to match the table and custom fitted to the room. There is also a cabinet next to the couch that has a vault-like magic’ed drawer where they can hide things.  

14. Bellamy’s Room

Eventually, this room will be Bellamy’s when the twins stop sharing a room by the time they’re about 13/14. Until then, it will be used The smallest of the three upstairs rooms. Some people might assume that Bellamy got it by default because he is technically the youngest, but he’s actually quite fine with it. He is the most like his mother when it comes to his living spaces. AKA -- he is a squirrel and likes his cozy little nest that is much messier than either of his siblings. He’s that person that puts clothes in drawers with one hand while reading with the other. 

15. Opal’s Room

Eventually, this room will be Opal’s. She’ll probably move up there when she’s like five or six, idk whatever the appropriate age would be for a kid to be more or less self-sufficient in the regard of going to sleep/getting up. In the meantime, it will probably be Lou’s because it looks out over the garden. Which means she will probably get a lot of leftover plants from him because he won’t want to disturb them. 

It is probably like a nice soft purple color or something right now. Opal constantly changes it. She repaints the room at least once a year and gets yelled at by her parents for rearranging her furniture at 2am sometimes. Also, the armchair in her room is the rocking chair that was in her nursery. 

16. Aidan’s Room

At first, this room will be both Bellamy and Aidan’s because it is the biggest of the three upstairs rooms. The bed with the book on it is Bellamy’s and the one that is empty is Aidan’s. They don’t mind sharing really and I imagine won’t get in lots of arguments about things. 

Because they are mediums, they both stay up late though they know not to disturb their parents or they’ll earn their wrath so they learn early on how to solve their own problems if they are getting on each other’s nerves. Their room is probably painted a nice pale yellow. Their biggest argument is probably closet space, because I could see Aidan being a fashionista and encroaching on Bellamy’s space and him getting annoyed about it. 

17. Children’s Bathroom

It’s a bathroom? I don’t know. There are probably lots of fights about who gets to use it first in the mornings and people taking too long. Though, there are other bathrooms that people can use. I imagine there are mornings where one of the kids just marches into Hades’ room like ALL THE BATHROOMS ARE TAKEN, I’M USING YOURS! 

What I’m saying is that privacy is an issue in this house, lmao. Yes, they expanded, but everyone is still living on top of each other.

18. Library

What? I thought there were books all over the house? Why do they need a library? 

Because there will always be more books in the house! Also, they needed another room to escape for anyone in the family who might need it. Feel like Bellamy will haunt it most often as he grows older, but Belle will go there too rather frequently. She likes to be surrounded by books. There is another chess table here (yes, that makes three.) Sometimes, Hades and Belle will sneak off to the library just to play a game of chess without being disturbed, because they don’t keep one in the office. (The office is for working, the library is for relaxation.) 

It is probably quite small actually and with a low, gabled ceiling. Floor to ceiling bookshelves all the way around the walls. 

19. Toulouse’s Studio

Unattached to the rest of the house and above Hades’ garage, is Toulouse’s art studio. To get in you have to climb a spiral iron staircase. On the west side of the studio are floor to ceiling windows that look out over the forest. On the south side of the studio is another large window (though, not floor to ceiling), that looks towards the house/the garden/the horse pastures beyond. Beneath this window is his desk. To the left of his desk is a long workbench with several stools where his woodworking and other projects will be. 

His favorite spot to paint is the place with the stool and empty easel, near the large floor-to-ceiling windows. There are also multiple plants in the room, scattered throughout. The couch actually pulls out into a bed, though it is rarely used. Sometimes, if Lou is in one of his moods, or if he just gets stuck on a project, he will stay the night in his studio.

This is Lou’s space and Belle/Hades rarely go in it, except to fetch him for dinner or whatnot. Sometimes, though, Opal will join him in it. She is the only one brave enough to put up with Lou when he’s in a bad mood and doesn’t want to be disturbed. It is also where she goes when she gets in fights with Belle and Hades, lol. Lou is the indulgent parent and everyone would rather she ran away to Lou’s art studio than to like...the wilds. 

[dwellordream]

A Six of Crows Review: Joost and Inej I

This marks the beginning of my review of Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo. Before I go any further, I want to provide context for my experience/knowledge of the book and its fandom. Six of Crows was published in 2015 when I was 16. I picked it up in a bookstore and read the first few chapters idly while shopping, before putting it back down.

At the time, my dislike of what I’d read was probably primarily fueled by the realization that it was by the same author as Shadow and Bone, which I had tried to read a few years before and disliked, and because at the time I was aging out of the YA genre in general and had very little patience for many of its familiar tropes.

In recent years, Six of Crows and its companion and predecessor series, the Grisha Trilogy, have become one of the most popular YA series online. The avid fan response and promotion of it on social media no doubt led to the Netflix series being greenlit and it is obviously trending at present due to the success of the series. With all that in mind, I’ve decided to try Six of Crows again and see for myself what all the hype is about.

Some more caveats: I am 22 years old. I am aware Six of Crows is YA literature intended for a middle and high school audience. I will not be holding it to the standards I would hold an adult grade fantasy book, in terms of prose, themes, or content. I am aware that I am not necessarily the target audience for the book and these reviews are in no way intended to shame or disparage anyone who enjoys the book.

Criticism is a healthy part of any fandom and does not necessarily constitute hate. I will likely critique elements of the book in my write up. That does not mean I have a personal vendetta against the author, publishers, or the TV show. Please do not take this as a personal attack if you’ve enjoyed the book. This is just intended to promote discussion and to gather my own thoughts.

If you follow me, I am tagging this as ‘in review’ so you know what to block if you don’t want to see my posts on your dash. I will be going through 1-2 chapters per weekend. This weekend I will be looking at the prologue, aka Joost, and the first Inej chapter.

Jumping into things, here is Joost:

The prologue is our introduction to Ketterdam, the setting of Six of Crows. It’s been a very long time since I read Shadow and Bone and so all I really know is that Ketterdam is a city in an island known as Kerch, based off the map. The major countries or kingdoms of the mainland to the east appear to be Fjerda, Ravka, and Shu Han, though it is unclear how they differ from one another at this point.

Ketterdam through Joost’s eyes is a sinister and dreary place, a city under a grimy night sky and full of dangers. Joost works as a hired guard for a very wealthy man named Hoede, who keeps grishas, powerful magic users, as indentured servants. Joost is infatuated with one of them, Anya, a healer, though he knows she is not likely to return his affections and furthermore cannot wed without the permission of her owner. We also learn that grishas are at risk for being kidnapped and sold by slavers due to their value. However, the indentured servant system of Ketterdam thus far doesn’t seem to be much better than slavery, given how little freedom the grisha have.

Overall, the prologue is supposed to give us a sense for the setting of Ketterdam and interest us in the main hook of the novel, which seems to be a mysterious substance that grisha can ingest to heighten their powers for the benefit of their masters, though it has the risks of making them uncontrollable. How well is this done?

Through Joost’s perspective we can glean several things; Ketterdam is a dirty city with rampant income inequality, full of crime and corruption. Magic is an established system within Ketterdam, but the magic users do not seem to be at the type of the hierarchy despite their powers, which suggests they are a minority to the extent of which they can still be controlled by the elite class of non magic users, if they have enough money and power.

It is also very obvious through the references in the prologue that Ketterdam is heavily based off the Netherlands during the Golden Age, which was Amsterdam’s (Ketterdam… Amsterdam… not subtle) economic and cultural boom during the 17th century, aka the 1600s. Notably the world’s first stock exchange began in Amsterdam in 1602, and it was a major port and trading hub for the Dutch East and Dutch West India Companies.

It is not clear if Ketterdam is also intended to be a 1600s-esque society, timeline wise, but we know that rifles are common place and there is a thriving merchant class who rule as opposed to old aristocracy, which seems to indicate a Renaissance style setting, as well as the urban environment in general. (That said, from the advertisements for the Netflix show, they seem to have updated it to a more Victorian-era 1800s society, in terms of fashion and general aesthetics).

Overall, the prologue does its job. It gives us a vague idea of what Ketterdam is like, how the society is structured, and who holds the power. It also ends on a suspenseful cliffhanger, leaving Joost’s fate unclear. Where it falls flat is that I think a little more time could have been spent fleshing out Joost as a narrator, even if this is his only showing in the book.

His internal monologue comes across as a bit dry and mechanical, as if the author is aware he is just a means to an end to start the book off with a bang, and he quickly turns into a walking camera (just there to report events to the reader, with no internal input from him), for the second half of the prologue, as we switch to just watching Anya and Hoede through his eyes. That said, it’s not a major problem, as Joost is clearly not intended to be a main character, and his narration still effectively conveys what is happening and sets the dark tone of the novel.

What I would have liked to see from the prologue is perhaps the POV of Anya herself, or the small child she is being forced to experiment on, as that might have been a more compelling and immerse introduction to Ketterdam and its dangers rather than the fairly bland and neutral Joost, who doesn’t really feel like a character so much as a bland stand-in for the reader. If we were put in the shoes of Anya, suddenly called upon by her power hungry employer to participate in this unethical test, or in the shoes of the small boy caught up in the middle of this, it might have been both more thrilling to read and given a more gritty sense of what it’s like to be on the lowest rungs of Ketterdam’s society, at the mercy of the most powerful.

Moving onto Inej, we run into some similar problems. After Inej’s first chapter, I couldn’t tell you a single thing about her, other than that she was an acrobat as a child, that she is part of the street gang known as the Dregs, and that she intensely values loyalty. This isn’t a problem, per say, but while that’s all good to know, it doesn’t give me any sense of Inej’s actual personality, which doesn’t exactly bode well. Like Joost, she comes across more as a walking camera and occasional tourist guide as opposed to a human character with her own worries, hopes, and fears.

I think this may become a recurring problem with Bardugo’s writing - ie all tell, no show. Inej is good at telling things. She tells us where we are as we follow her to the location of a stand-off between rival gangs, she tells us that Kaz, their leader ‘doesn’t need a reason’, though she never exactly explains what that means other than that he is widely feared, she tells us that she is very fond of her knives.

But in terms of writing, we shouldn’t have to be force fed all this information via her internal monologue, which, again, entirely cuts out once the action picks up, just like Joost’s. While I don’t need her thoughts on every threat or gunshot, it would be nice to feel as if she hadn’t just vanished from the story completely as soon as the dialogue starts.

We also meet Kaz and Jesper, though I couldn’t tell you much about them utter than that Inej clearly admires, even venerates Kaz as an accomplished intimidator and chess master, and that Jesper is clearly the joker of the group.

It also feels incredibly weird that this parley between gangs in happening in front of the city’s stock exchange. Inej tells us this is because the Exchange is one of the few remaining neutral territories, but it’s also heavily guarded, which means every time a gang wants to parley, they have to pay out the cash to bribe all the guards to very pointedly ignore a meeting between rambunctious and trigger happy street gangsters on their literal doorstep.

I understand why Bardugo chose this location, wanting to contrast the violence of the gang members with the economic injustice that the Exchange and its merchant rulers represents, but it just seems a bit silly. They couldn’t meet at the docks? In an alley way? This is like picturing the American Mafia hosting a public meeting at the New York Stock Exchange with a bunch of cops twiddling their thumbs nearby.

The foreshadowing that Bollinger is the traitor (‘I’m not going to bet on my own death’) also seems very heavy handed and a little much, but I’ll let it slide.

It’s also not really clear while Inej is present at this meeting in the first place. Kaz commands her to keep watch from above, but he has also put a contingency plan in place that doesn’t even involve her, having bought out some of Geels’ men from under him. Why put Inej looking down from above if you’re not involving her in this plan? Her only role seems to be to watch, and she doesn’t even have a gun she could play sniper with. It just seems like a hamfisted way of getting Inej out of the danger zone so the author can have her as a passive spectator to the violence that follows.

This is my main problem with this chapter. It’s supposed to introduce us to Inej, but really, it’s introducing us to Kaz. Which is fine, but as he also has a POV in this book, it seems a bit lame that her own chapter is completely overtaken by showing off A. his smarts and B. how dangerous he is, despite being dismissed as a young ‘cripple’ by the likes of Geels.

Geels is also… not a greatly done villain. I get that he’s supposed to be small fry and is just a precursor to much more threatening opponents, but his every line of dialogue feels designed to show off how cool and Machiavellian Kaz is in comparison. He doesn’t seem like an actual hardened criminal who has underestimated his opponent, but a somewhat cheesy cartoon thug who unironically says things like “How are you going to wriggle your way out of this one?” with his full chest. The effect is comical, and not in a good way.

This chapter also shows off Kaz’s sadistic side in full display, which is probably one of the only interesting things about it, though it would be nice if we got any input at all from Inej on this… instead she completely vanishes from her own narration, to the point where she might as well not be present at all. Kaz has no qualms about tracking down his enemies’ weakness, such as lovers and family, and threatening them.

But the open horror and shock Geels reacts with seems incongruent, as if Kaz were the first up and coming gangster to actually consider threatening someone’s family or girlfriend. That seems pretty par for the course for violent criminals trying to claim territory and unnerve their rivals, yet Inej and Geels himself react as if no one had ever thought of sinking to the level of ‘do what I want or I’ll kill your loved ones’ until Kaz invented it. It just feels a bit silly and on the nose.

Really, my overarching issue with this chapter is that it’s not about Inej at all, it’s just an introduction to the Kaz Brekker fan club. I don’t automatically hate Kaz as a character, but his introduction is heavyhanded and comes at the cost of any establishing character moments for Inej. The most we get out of her is her brief pangs of sympathy for Bollinger despite his treachery, and her brief reference to her childhood. Maybe future Inej chapters will totally change this, but right now, it’s not a great sign of what’s to come.

I can think of about a hundred things Inej could have done or said this chapter to develop or establish her personality at all, but all we got was her briefly holding a knife to someone, and her briefly saying a prayer for Bollinger. I think it would have worked much better had this plan to catch Geels with his pants down been Inej’s invention or at least worked out between her and Kaz, rather than her just there to play lookout and admire how cool Kaz is.

Or at the very least, we could have seen the scene referenced where she searches the crime scene of the assassination, instead of that getting two lines and an entire chapter being devoted to what boils down to a pissing contest over which gangs gets rights to a certain neighborhood.

Next week, we will look at Kaz I.

[legionofpotatoes]

As someone who absolutely loves sci-fi and loved ME, but struggles to care much for anything fantasy (never cared for LOTR or Witcher, what would you recommend about Dragon Age that might appeal to me?

I am not sure how to enter your headspace nonnie, so it’s a bit hard for me to answer genuinely, but uhm. I’ll try to start broad and address Dragon Age in a bit?

From what I understand if someone goes exclusively after sci-fi and not fantasy, there’s something unapproachable about the aesthetic packaging to them. Because by and large both of those genres operate on the same heightened metaphor plane, but sci fi is much much closer to our ground rules whereas fantasy is probably harder to relate to on those elemental points. Beyond that, the stories told are quite similar because as people we tell similar stories. So it’s hard for me to tell why you’ve never cared for the genre at large.

My guess? There is a seeming elegance to worldbuilding structure of science fiction that I think some consider absent from fantasy - that fantasy by its definition is a kitchen sink playhouse of wish fulfillment - and hence find it overwhelming to engage with. I say this because I’ve had this thought a few times as a kid.

But it is not at all the case; to go back to Dragon Age and relate it to your love of Mass Effect, see how the integral strength of ME’s stories are the conflicts it creates from character-driven plots, and how those conflicts are built upon internal world rules like AI ethics or power abuse or familial relationships or even weaponized genophages. Those are all ideas that are hardwired into the foundation of the worldbuilding and not vice versa; and thus are supported by the narrative, feeding directly into character actions and giving us those sweet sweet conflicts that make good stories and make us love these games. None of that is absent in Dragon Age; it is not an unapproachable esoteric world without any tether to our own. It is just as hardwired with stone-set rulesets and established political and ethical conflicts as any Mass Effect, it just has a different packaging around it with an appropriately varying combat gameplay component and all of this ends up asking us to buy into their exposition with a bit more abandon than usual, but beneath all that is the same exact dance of Bioware’s wobbly ethical dilemmas expressed through quests and stories tied around gathering rag-tag teams of lovable characters with optional romances thrown in. Execution on all that stuff is more-or-less as imperfect as in Mass Effect, but that’s something subjective that I don’t need to talk about here.

This is all like big-level stuff about story ethos and its function within heightened genres, but I may have completely overshot your initial ask in my ramble :D if your question was a simpler quandary based on gameplay mechanics and such, well, Dragon Age’s dialogue and character relationship systems are VERY similar to Mass Effect, you can really tell it’s built under the same roof. Combat gameplay is quite different, with a higher emphasis on class power play and squad management (you have 3 companions with you in combat encounters, as opposed to 2 in ME, and that ties into the overall balance), and tbh it can get more fun than ME since there’s no Gun you can fall back on. So it’s all about using the tactical pause and approaching hard encounters like a chess game, with a less faster overall pace. Camera’s third person.

As for the exploration pillar, it is pronounced in some installments but less so in others. To wit, the DA trilogy games are just as varied in their systems as the ME trilogy games were, so it is hard to talk about that part succinctly. Origins covers one country, DAII is set more or less in a single city, and Inquisition spans half a continent. The stories they tell and their parsable content is tied very much to how those settings mentally scale.

Another big thing that might sit on top of your criteria is the playable character; while similar to ME in terms of the DA games telling a chronological story of Thedas (the world they are set in), their protagonists differ per game and hence boast no direct and instant connection to the PC like you’d get in the second and third ME games. The savegame transfer is still a thing and worldstates carry over, but e.g. central characters from past games may show up as tertiary NPCs in later ones and create a meta dissonance and a disconnect between your headspace and that of your player character’s, who does not know them at all. I find that a bit irritating, but it comes with the approach.

So yeah, I think I’ll end here until my rant becomes unmanageable. This wasn’t as much a recommendation as it was an overview that you can hopefully make a more educated decision on. I apologize for the long read. Thanks for the ask!

[iamacolor]

fashion queen! which nct era has the best fashun in ur opinion?? and if u were a designer which neos would u pick as ur models?

I was so excited to answer this that I wrote several pages and it basically turned into a style analysis for each unit so I sure hope you have some time on your hands to read everything I’ve just written! (I did not reread so sorry for any typing mistake)

NCT is known to be experimental in their music and that’s also the case in their styling so there’s a lot for me to get into even though sometimes it’s a miss. One thing I will say though is that when it comes to the styling in mv/teasers, what’s around the clothes is super important because if you have a very specific styling concept, your set design or graphic design needs to complement that and give the audience more clues on how to read all these elements together (the cherry bomb era is a great example of that with all the added graphic elements and the predominance of the colour pink) and recently I’ve found that the creative team has not really gone further than just putting nct in an outfit in front of a basic background so it makes for a pretty underwhelming result

But let’s move on to my favourite styling eras. I’m going to do this per unit (I’ll finish with NCT U) and define an era by its teaser pictures and the mv (and not go through all the performance looks during the promotion period)

I’m putting this under a read more because it’s reaaally long (I put pictures so that it’s not just one big chunk of text)

NCT 127

Easily the most experimental unit when it comes to fashion, especially in their first years where they would wear mix of sportswear, grunge references, avant-garde fashion and a lot of layers. When it comes to their debut “Firetruck”, I think it fitted the song really well but that it didn’t fit all the members equally (especially the younger ones, for me Taeyong and Taeil pulled it off the best – it’s expected of Taeyong but I also think that Taeil always stand out when they go for edgy/unconventional look, I think it really suits him).

Anyway, just to say that they were off to a very strong start and then I’m just going to kindly ignore the Limitless styling and move on to Cherry Bomb!

One thing nicely done for CB is how when you look at a group picture they’re clearly all following the same concept but they’re not necessarily matching or giving off the same vibes if you take them individually. I love the use of the colour pink which brings a) a great visual impact (you don’t ever see that much pink at once – especially on men) and b) an harmony despite the shapes and styles of their outfits being so vastly different, you’ve got ties, tousled, shirts, little frilled collars, stripes and all-over prints, sportswear and formal wear… (ex: taeyong’s short jacket is reminiscent of something a little luxurious, even maybe historical/noble with the little added embroidery-like details, it reminds me of these boleros jackets worn by toreros that are often red/gold VS doyoung’s overalls is an outfit that has a much more recent origin as it was first worn by factories workers, it’s usually blue or grey and is meant to be practical rather than pleasing to the eye -> here it fits very well with the general setting of the mv in what looks like an empty industrial storage space)

This second look is more of a game on how to deconstruct formal wear (there are less prints and no bold colours, their hair is less messy…) but they don’t just add sportswear like the bomber jacket, you can find rock or more “modern” elements with the leather jackets or the jean jackets. All in black and white so great contrast with the previous looks, although that mix and match concept is still there. My favourite elements are the checkered ones (worn by taeyong, taeil and haechan) as it reminds me of the strategy element of the chess game which fits pretty well with all the weapons and other arms visible in the mv (a bit like a nod to the game battleship)

This one I love that they developed their own print, especially since it’s another graphic element used elsewhere (see their album cover), because it’s a great way to really introduce their identity as a group, through the different visual elements they put out in a comeback, it’s like a logo but as a print. And all the teasers and the mv did a great job at mixing 2D/3D contents so that’s another nice way to be cohesive. It’s not my fave look out of the 3 (especially because I do not approve of that belt-suspenders-bag they gave Johnny, it’s like everything you don’t want to put a dancer in and it’s ugly as well) but I still like the fact that’s it’s another nod to the battle/strategy aspect of this comeback, like they’re on a mission to hit the stage and conquer it

Then fast forward to my other favourite one, Simon Says! (No teaser pictures here because they don’t show anything or they show not enough lol)

First of all THE MASKS

Oh how I wish they could’ve been shown more (imagine teasers with the members wearing them!!! I would’ve loved individual teasers based on each of the masks concepts) Once again, a great to have group concept without making everyone wear the same thing. They’re all super different and full of details. Haechan’s is the only one from what I could who’s mask is actually a mask and not a fully covering hood. The materials and techniques used on these are either evocative of “fragile” things like glass and flowers but theses elements have their own hidden strength. Some others are covered in lace, pearls, fringes or fur…all these things are usually considered to be precious or even luxurious but it covers their faces and their identity and they throw it away in rebellion (and I think it’s also super interesting how Taeyong who takes off his mask first has the least ornamented one)

Then the outfits themselves. Simon Says in an interesting MV because unlike most others they wear one outfit for most of the MV (the second one appears quite late in the mv and is lit and staged in a way that makes it less visible). It’s a mostly grey/white set of outfits which is usually a colour combo for office wear or maybe factory workers, it’s not something that can seem very exciting or edgy. The styling in these outfits reminds me of the works of Japanese designers who came to Paris in the 80’s and kind of shook the whole high fashion system by bringing a different type of shapes, aesthetic and purpose to fashion (Rei Kawakubo, Yohji Yamamoto…). These designers  went on to become super successful and inspired another wave of “avant-garde” designers nicknamed “the 6 of Anvers” (Anvers is a city in Belgium), this group includes Martin Margiella, Dries Van Noten…And to me the outfits in Simon Says really fit into this aesthetic. Unconventional fits, various layers, it’s not so much mix and match than a work on contrast between structure and fluidity (Yuta’s half skirt with un-trimed edges, Haechan’s long shirt with the long bow and the fitted jacket, Mark’s top with the various see-through layers of different lengths…).

An other interesting details (which to me calls back to the mask and that tension in the song/concept of letting go/being free of expectations), is the way they all have thick strings tied on their feet/ankles. Not holding them back because their feet aren’t tied together but there’s still this clear restriction of the garment itself, a reminder that there are tied to something and not completely free (also an interesting choice when dressing dancers who would need to have no added weight or discomfort in their outfit to dance but visually something is holding their ankles)

Honorable mentions:

Kick It– they managed to create very memorable outfits while taking inspirations from already well known elements (both for the fighting/training outfits and the bomber jackets). The black and white outfits especially are very original as performance outfits/dancing clothes since the og garment they’re inspired by has already such a strong identity outside of the performing arts and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it be used as a stage outfit? Or concept? It’s a nice exemple of how you can take inspiration for something designed to be useful and to be efficient (in fighting) and turn it into an aesthetic.

Truthfully, martial art training outfit was already an “aesthetic” on its own but they made it a performance costume and now I do feel like it’s one of these looks that everyone will remember (like if there was a “most memorable kpop outfits” list it could easily have kick it’s black/white fits). The rest of the outfits for that concept weren’t as memorable/original to me although I feel like it showed a new approach to the styling of nct 127 as a group since they all had very similar outfits this time (especially when wearing the jackets).

Also, interestingly,  that shot of Jaehyun that had everyone go “wow” ? Well it’s impactful because it’s him and he looks like that and it’s shot in a very specific way, but it’s also even more impactful because he’s the only one who gets to wear that kind of outfit in the mv. Everyone else has 3 sets of outfits (black and white, shiny black, red jacket and black pants) but he has 4 and that suit is only used in that shot which makes for a greater impact!

And I feel like Kick It in terms of styling opened a new era for NCT 127 has it kind of broke their usual mix and match/edgy concept. This time they were clearly referencing something already well known (either martial arts, the 90s…), and the members were all matching and they kept on doing that with the military jackets in punch, the other 90s concept in nct 2020…

Touch – for the way the outfits match the sets (in all their individual sets their outfits have a detail in a matching colour), the focus on colours !!! You can see that this whole concept was designed with this colour game/colour progression between the outfits and the set in mind. It’s just very pleasing to the eyes and a great contrast to their usual stuffs (also I wrote my graduation paper on colours so I am really into creative use of colours like this)

OK now moving on to Dream!!

The interesting thing about Dream compared to NCT 127 is that from the beginning although their outfits had to match the song an the concept of the comeback it also had to match their age. Dream’s a group that had to look young when debuting (to the point where they wore outfits that made them look even younger than they were which is rarely done for boy groups) and then they had to transition into adulthood, and all of that had to be made visible. In that aspect, I really like the styling for We Young and Boom (especially when you look at them at the same time).

For We Young, the styling is meant to be reminiscent of school/boy scout uniforms but with a marine vibe. It makes for playful outfits that aren’t too childish but that also aren’t grown up. I prefer the “seaside” outfits as I don’t really like school uniforms as a concept for styling and I think it’s really a choice that suited them and the song so well, it really fitted their energy. It’s playful but it also has a vintage touch to it as these outfits with their stripes and their squared flap at the back date back to the XIXth century (I just found out that it all started with the queen Victoria dressing up her kid in an outfit inspired by the royal navy uniforms for a painting after a cruise ).

Boom on the other side is their first proper “grown-up” concept. We go up was already more grown up but still very “teenager-ish” and although they were mostly teenagers when they did Boom it was clear that this was supposed to be their first entry into “adulthood” as a group at least. And although they did wear a sportswear/casual outfits which is something that isn’t related to age (and I really like the black and white “skeleton” set which already feels more grown-up and more “stylish” than the other casual outfit) , they wore two other “grown-up” elements: suits and all-jean outfits.

And yeah teenagers, and kids wear jeans too but a full jean-on-jean outfit is more of a “grown-up” fashion choice and it makes them look like young men rather than boys. As for the suits, I just really love when stylists play with the codes of that garment (length of the jacket, tightness of the pants, the way the shirt is tucked in…).

Notice how Renjun has a really short jacket, Chenle’s pants are wide, Jeno has a tail…Once again, a really interesting aspect of Kpop is the variations of the same concept based on the members. In the mv, there is a tension between their more grown up selves (the one in suits, the one with a craft/a path) and their young selves (the one running around in the field, the one laying down in the flowers and eating a cake). And there is also in these outfits and the contrast between them this tension, this contrast…which path should they go? The jeans are the more laide back, innocent outfits, whereas the suits come with responsibilities and status (and you’ll notice that in the scene where jisung is left alone to blow his candle it’s when he’s wearing jeans not when he’s in the suits).

Now on to WayV!!

WayV are different from the two in the sense than when they debuted they couldn’t have an “age” concept or an edgy concept because 127 and dream had already taken those and I feel like for that reason they’re still looking for what makes them stand out visually from the others (and in my opinion it’s not in whatever they were wearing for turn back time!). WayV’s concept is space and time travel, it’s building a new life, a new worl, going beyond anything! In my mind, they’re either supposed to feel a bit “otherworldly” (either spectacular or literally like they’re from another world/another universe, a little bit futuristic maybe?) or to look like explorers/travellers (they have a lot of travel/transportation “gears” references in their outfits). Their MVs also have a very different production than the other nct mvs (the scale and the way it’s filmed, the sets…it’s a different approach and it’s usually much more “grand” for their title tracks). The great thing about WayvV styling is usually that they match the outfits well with the world that the mv is set in (like in Moonwalk for example you get a sense of the world they’re in and the fact that it’s not ours or at least not as we know it now through the way they dress – you can’t really say oh it’s inspired by this era or by this or that because -at least- to me it immediately gives me a vibe of something that could be worn in a sci-fi movie, almost like a costume) or that they allude to travel in their styling.

When they debuted with Regular they went for a very sleek and high fashion look which worked really well for them! Even their more “casual” looks were a bit striking and I think that’s very “wayv-like” to me.

Same goes for Take Off where they mix the individual styles (and I don’t like ten’s leopard fur sleeveless jacket at all) and the group concepts – the “flying” outfits and the “racing” outfits (that last one is my favourite! I love the silhouette it creates with the tight pants and the larger tops with an emphasis on the waist).

There’s something a bit extra to WayV - which is why some of their outfits remind me of costumes more than fashion while at the same time they’re the most “high fashion” unit– like the “flying” outfit in Take Off are recognizable as “flying gear” but you can’t really tell what they’re flying, it feels once again like something that they could wear in like star wars or a similar kind of story.

Imagine a movie about 7 men on another planet trying to come together to overcome the dark forces or whatever’s bad on their planet in a futuristic society with a mix of “traditional” and “trendy” outfits? That’s WayV. The movie the 5th Sense? That’s WayV but on steroids. They’re also the only group with actual characters in their mvs, they’re all supposed to have a backstory or an individual setting and find a way to get together in their mvs.

Anyway all that to say that it’s hard for me to pick an era for them because they’ve only had a few and they still feel like they’re looking to solidify their concept, and since moonwalk and turn back time really set the styling in different worlds than ours, you have to look at how they fit in that world rather than ours and I think Moonwalk does it best since it’s the most cohesive one visually. But then I think Regular had the best individual styling!

Okay this is super long but we’re finally getting to NCT U!!!!

Number one favourite:

The Year Party outfits!!!! I’ve already talked about this but I love when they say we’ll put them in suits and then since they have to make a different one for each of them they cut bits an dpieces of the suits here and there, play with lengths. It’s not a revolutionary concept but in terms of searching for a shape, searching for variations of an already so famous, so well-known garment (everyone has seen a suit, and so many designers have already deconstructed it and then put it back together and so on) it’s so nice, it’s almost like a full collection given how many members there are and it’s just a good tailoring work.It almost feel like an exercise of how many variations of an outfit can you think of? And it looks fun to do! It’s all about the details and the way the layers are set together.

The accessories add to the “formal attire” aspect of it. It almost has a ceremonial look to it. A bit of royalty with the futuristic vibe usually associated with WayV. The dark blue suits were pretty classic, the most interesting details (for me at least) were on the light blue ones. Especially since it’s a rare colour to find in formal wear or in ceremonial wear. In general, I feel like it’s a pretty rare colour in fashion outside of like shirts and baby clothes? I think it was a great styling choice for a content like the year party although I do wish they (either NCT or WayV who’ve touched upon this kind of outfit a bit already) would do a full comeback with this kind of styling (like the lighter version of the black and green outfits in SuperM’s One). It’s not revolutionary but it was something new for NCT and I really hope they use that elegant/futuristic concept once again.

Also in these outfits, the jewelry is super important and adds to the “grand” aspect of these outfits. The concept is that these aren’t ordinary outfits for ordinary men, we’re witnessing something “special” and so they aren’t wearing their usual jewels either (of course the big chains are still there but differently look at that necklace jaehyun is wearing)

Honorable mention:

Boss & Baby Don’t Stop (they’re different but they go together in my mind lol). Look at them in their uniforms! And also they had doyoung wearing these sunglasses

Ok I think I’m done, if you’ve made it this far thank you so much and I hope it was a nice read!!

As for who would I chose as my models…it really depends on what I’d make them wear tbh for menswear the things I’d like to design would either be something like formal wear or knitwear – I’d pick Lucas, Taeyong and Doyoung (I think they’re the most model-like members and could pull off pretty much anything even my non-edgy concept because I can’t do that lol and they pose very well) and then depending on the concept I’d pick between Winwin, Jaehyun, Kun, Jungwoo, Taeil, Haechan and Shotaro (the way I struggled to remember all the members at once…there are too many really)

[jadelotusflower]

Roundup - September 2021

This month: Saving Fish From Drowning, Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass, Anne Boleyn, Cruella, The Chair

Reading

Saving Fish from Drowning (Amy Tan) - I've always enjoyed Tan's work (particularly The Joy Luck Club, both the book and film) - Fish is somewhat of a departure, following a group of American tourists in Myanmar, narrated by their recently deceased friend Bibi Chen. The novel begins with a preface in which Tan explains she drew inspiration for the novel based on real events chronicled by a San Franciscan psychic's "automatic writing" channeling Chen's spirit (in truth a complete invention on Tan’s part, both literary device and metaphor).

Bibi is a compelling narrator, full of wry commentary of her friends as they bumble their way through their trip, the tone of the novel quite light despite some of the dark subject matter around the political situation in Myanmar (the novel was written in 2005 and set several years earlier) and the nature of intervention - the title referring to fisherman who "save fish from drowning" by netting them. It was at times difficult to keep track of all twelve (!) of the main characters and who was who outside of the few who get the most attention of the narrative.

An interesting read, about the stories we tell ourselves and others, and the fictions we believe for comfort and hope.

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass and what Alice found there (Lewis Carroll) - I've been making more of an effort to work on my novel lately, which makes some reference to these works so thought it was due for a re-read. It seems impossible to consider these separate novels given how conflated they have become in pop culture - even the Disney film takes elements from both - they act as either a duology, or alternatively a single story told in two parts.

I personally much prefer Looking Glass, perhaps because I imprinted on the 1985 miniseries as a child (which adapts both novels, but we only had the second part on tape) - best known for it's celebrity cameos in silly costumes - including Sammy Davis Jnr, Donald O'Connor, Ringo Starr, and Carol Channing, among others, and the danger of the Jabberwocky as a manifestation of Alice's fears quite a nice idea that isn't found in the original text.

Perhaps Looking Glass, while remaining absurdist, is more cohesive than Wonderland with the chess motif and central motive for Alice to reach the Eighth Square and become a queen. I do however find the constant poetry tedious, and wonder whether both Wonderland and Looking Glass are better remembered for the concepts rather than the actual text.

Watching

Anne Boleyn (episodes 1-3) - I didn't think we needed another film/show about Anne, but I was always going to watch it. This series relies upon familiarity with history as it begins with Anne's final, doomed pregnancy - opening with the haunting words “Anne is the most powerful woman in England - she has just five months to live.”

There's nothing especially new here; rather a mood and character piece as Anne's isolation and desperation grows. It is of course built around the central, compelling performance of Jodie Turner-Smith, in every single scene and not afraid to shy away from Anne's sharper edges while remaining profoundly sympathetic, surrounded by a court of whispers, her existence on a knife's edge. We know only what Anne knows, and we see the smaller, heartbreaking moments usually passed over in other adaptations - in her grief following the stillbirth, Anne sits up in bed almost catatonic, milk leaking from her breasts, her attempt to walk back the infamous “dead man's shoes” comment, and the long days of her imprisonment.

Then there’s the beautiful costumes - in a court of dark furs, Anne wears bold primary colours and velvets that catch the light, that them become more subdued prints once she is in the Tower.

The other notable feature is the casting - described as "identity conscious" rather than colour-blind, representative of the othering of Anne and her relatives. Another standout is Thalissa Teixeira as Anne's cousin Madge Shelton, fleshed out as her confidant and the only one who remains true to her. It's a fresh perspective and a worthwhile watch, particularly for Turner-Smith's performance.

Cruella (dir. Craig Gillespie) - Spoilers. I wasn’t planning on bothering with this, but my sister wanted to watch it and I’d been told by several people that it was actually quite good. Look, I'm not saying they lied, I just think they were able to look past things that I was not.

Because actually, the core story has potential and the film has enjoyable elements (notably Emma Thompson), but simply falters every time they try and shoehorn references to the source material, and there are some truly egregious attempts - Roger is the Baroness’s lawyer for some reason? And writes the familiar Cruella De Vil song about how awful she is when she's just given him a puppy?

It doesn’t work as a prequel, or villain origin story, or even a reboot, since Cruella’s character journey is over by the end of the film (I have no idea what the purported sequel is going to be about) - in fact "Cruella" is just a persona Stone's Estella adopts (complete with a terrible affected accent), and there is no conceivable way for her to become the wannabe puppy murderer we know from the book or any of the film adaptations. Oh, and Pongo and Perdita are siblings! Well done, Disney. Slow clap for you.

Also, with a runtime of 2 hours 16 minutes it is Interminable and the whole thing is saddled with a terrible, unnecessary voiceover. Seriously, they should show this in film class to demonstrate when v/o hinders not helps.

They were likely going for a Maleficent-style re-imagining, but where that succeeded (somewhat) in a completely new retelling right down to a different ending to the source material, this wants to have it's cake and eat it too - it wants to have the Cruella aesthetic (the car, the hair, Hell Hall, the camp accent) but doesn't ever let her be a villain, or even the beginnings of a villain, but that's that's reason she's so memorable in the first place. It puts all the pieces in place for the story we know, and yet that story simply cannot happen with this version of Cruella.

In the end, it's a story of a fundamentally decent person who maybe goes a bit overboard in retaliating to bullies, and swindles a sociopath to reclaim what's rightfully hers. Cruella De Vil! I just couldn't get over this fundamental misapplication of the source material.

In many ways, it almost feels as if this was pitched as a sequel, with Cruella in the Baroness role. It would have fit a lot better with the aesthetic, the time period, and the concept of punk disruption of classic fashion. Or, it was a completely unrelated story of a plucky orphan who rises in the fashion world, that at some point was grafted onto the Dalmatians property. Either one would have worked better, frankly.

I am probably being overly harsh. If you switch off your brain and enjoy the clothes it’s fine. But honestly, if you want your live action Cruella fix, just watch the Glenn Close version, because it is superior in every way.

The Chair (season 1) - I watched this for Sandra Oh, and I was not disappointed, because I got to watch Sandra Oh. On the other hand...it's not that I didn't like it, I just...wish it had been better?

The story revolves around Ji-Yoon Kim, the first woman (let alone woman of colour) to become Chair of English at a "minor Ivy" university, as she tries to juggle the clash of old style academia and new, raise her daughter as a single mother, and deal with a series of controversies caused by one of her professors (and love interest). It's the latter I feel sucked up way too much time and was ultimately unsatisfying - particularly the end, which was played like a moral victory but really rubbed me the wrong way. If this gets a season 2, I hope they dump Jay Duplass' fuckup sadsack because hoo boy, am I sick of that kind of male character.

But Sandra Oh is wonderful.

Writing

The Lady of the Lake - chapter 5 posted, 4215 words (10,261)

Against the Dying of the Light 1954 words (11,976)

Here I Go Again - 414 words (12,948)

Novel - 1039 words (1484)

Total this month: 7,622

Total this year: 48,435

[bopinion]

Book of the month / 2021 / 08 August

I love books. Even though I hardly read any. Because my library is more like a collection of tomes, coffee-table books, limited editions... in short: books in which not "only" the content counts, but also the editorial performance, the presentation, the curating of the topic - the book as a total work of art itself.

Through a different Lens

Stanley Kubrick (& Sean Corcoran, Donald Albrecht, Luc Sante)

Photography / 1997 / Taschen Publishing House

Every now and then, I sentence the kids to watch movies that I think are relevant - whether from a personal or a cinematic point of view. While my little son tends to be served light fare like "Blues Brothers," my big daughter sometimes has to chew a little harder, as happened the other day with "2001: A Space Odyssey." Her enthusiasm was a bit restrained, even if I exclaimed about 23 times, "That movie is from 1968. There were no special effects then, it's all actually built!".

Even regardless of that aspect, this epic can be considered groundbreaking. From the genre reference of the classical music background and the excellent script, to the technological authenticity and the almost psychedelic color scheme, to the revolutionary camera work. Above all, the visual composition of this film is the true mastery of director Stanley Kubrick, who is not considered one of the most important filmmakers of all time for nothing. Of course, I also have the matching book in my library ("The Making of Stanley Kubrick's '2001: A Space Odyssey'", also from Taschen, of course), but this time it's about another work of this visually powerful creator: his early work, photography.

"In the Streets of New York" is the title of the publisher's documentary "Through a different Lens" on the occasion of an exhibition of the same name at the Museum of the City of New York. For it was there that Kubrick, just 17 years old, went on his first stalk of optical impressions. In 1945, he signed on as a photographer for the magazine "Look," for which he photographed stories with a human touch in the streets, clubs and sports arenas of New York City for five years. In the process, he captured with his camera just about everything that made up life in the Big Apple in that era: People in the laundromat, the hustle and bustle at Columbia University, sports stars, showgirls in their dressing rooms, performers in the circus, Broadway actresses rehearsing their lines, cab drivers changing a tire, couples kissing on the train platform, shoe shine boys, boxers reconsidering their career choice in the ring corner, patients in their dentist's waiting room, prominent businessmen, politicians, children in the amusement park, and commuters on the Subway.

Even these photographs from Kubrick's younger years reveal a startling sense of composition, tension, and atmosphere, and seem like film stills to never-shot dramas from the jungles of the big city. "This exhibition reveals how (Kubricks) formative years laid the groundwork for his compelling storytelling and dark visual style. They also show a noir side of New York that's no longer around." (Vanity Fair) "Photography, and particularly his years with Look magazine, laid the technical and aesthetic foundations for a way of seeing the world and honed his ability to get it down on film. There, he mastered the skill of framing, composition and lighting to create compelling images," explains Sean Corcoran, curator of the exhibition "Through a different Lens" and co-author of the book. Apparently, it was clear to the young man from the very beginning where his talent lay and how he was able to hone and master it.

Stanley Kubrick was born in New York City on July 26, 1928, as the first of two children. His parents came from Jewish families, and all of his grandparents had immigrated from Austro-Hungarian Galicia. His early passions were excessive reading, cinema and chess. He was first gifted a camera, a Graflex, from his father when he was 13 years old. And he immediately took off as a photographer for the William Howard Taft High School student newspaper. After graduation, he turned his hobby into a career and at the age of 18 became a full-time photographer for Look, to which he had previously sold amateur photos. As early as 1950, Kubrick directed his first documentary, "Day of the Fight", about life in and around the boxing ring, which he had already explored photographically. Although only 16 minutes long, the film was already considered a sensational study at the time. His future career path was set, the rest is history.

"Through a Different Lens" was an extremely successful exhibition, which subsequently also went on tour. Not only Kubrick fans were impressed by the mastery of optical staging that was already visible at an early stage. Corcoran: "Kubrick learned through the camera's lens to be an acute observer of human interactions and to tell stories through images in dynamic narrative sequences. (His) ability to see and translate an individual's complex psychological life into visual form was apparent in his many personality profiles for the publication. His experiences at the magazine (Look) also offered him opportunities to explore a range of artistic expressions. Overall, Kubrick's still photography demonstrates his versatility as an image maker. Look's editors often promoted the straightforward approach of contemporary photojournalism at which Kubrick excelled. It's clear he always got the photographs that were needed for the assignment, but that he was also unafraid to make pictures that excited his own aesthetic sensibility."

Beyond the 100 photographs in the exhibition, the book presents 300 of Kubrick's images, including unpublished shots and outtakes. Annotated by Corcoran, his colleague Donald Albrecht, and renowned writer and critic Luc Sante, who has published most notably in Interview and Harper's. They place the motifs in their context, refer to stylistic aspects, and thus point to Kubrick's (imminent) artistic career. Above all, in contrast to the exhibition, the book offers all friends of photography - whether fans of Kubrick or not - a rare insight into the proverbial pioneering early work of a brilliant artist. And into one of the most interesting eras of the "city that never sleeps" - yes, even Frank Sinatra was photographed by young Kubrick.

From the extensive, mostly euphoric reviews of the book "Through a different Lens" or the oeuvre documented in it, let's take one example each from a professional and an amateur:

"The man who later led a genre to its lonely high point and at the same time to its final point with each of his films knew already at the age of barely 17, that's how old he was at the time, that expression and form shape every impression." (Die Welt)

"I can't praise this book enough. Wonderful collection and very informative. An absolute must for those wishing to understand more of how Kubrick valued the frame." (Yvi on amazon.com)

P.S.: Just for the sake of completeness, let's mention Kubrick's cinematic output after his breakthrough: 1960: Spartacus / 1962: Lolita / 1964: Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb / 1968: 2001: A Space Odyssey / 1971: A Clockwork Orange / 1975: Barry Lyndon / 1980: The Shining / 1987: Full Metal Jacket / 1999: Eyes Wide Shut. No, this is not a selection of greatest hits, this is a complete listing. And thus the proof that he has indeed realized a significant peak in the respective genre. His great influence on the history of cinema is also shown by the fact that he is the only director to appear a total of five times in the list of the 100 films with the best critics' ratings.

In addition, two side notes: Kubrick spent several years preparing a film biopic about Napoleon Bonaparte. The preparations were so far along that he could have started production at any time. However, the release of "Waterloo" (1970) and its poor financial results dissuaded him and the film studio from the project. The project has since been known as "The greatest Movie never made". He also dealt intensively with the subject of the Holocaust. After the release of "Schindler's List" (1993), however, he discarded these plans explaining that Steven Spielberg had already told all the essential.

Stanley Kubrick died of a heart attack on March 7, 1999, in his home at Childwickbury Manor near London, where he had lived in seclusion since the 1960s and had set up studio and editing rooms in the former stables.

Here's a short trailer for the exhibition "Trough a different Lens":

https://youtu.be/EgPlnjeBs7E

[miraimisu]

Chapter 54 [EXTRA]

(that is the wrong header and we are going to ignore that)

So this chapter turned out to be 14k and that’s too long so I said “fuck it this chapter is very important” and the beginning isn’t needed so I’m posting it here! It also serves as a preview of some sorts for this chapter because it’s a very important chapter full of all that Pirate Stuff Goodness and I nearly cried revising it so instead of posting it on AO3 I’ll leave it here :>

HERE YOU HAVE A DELETED SCENE OF SORTS WOOSH

Warning: Moon being a dumbass and BROT3 foolery to ensue. Beware of me writing Moon as an absolute insane bean.

The Blackring is surprisingly supportive when it comes to boarding the ships and organizing their strategy, if their plan of 'sailing into the Soakedge Sea and getting the boss real good' qualifies as an actual strategy. Regardless, they still lend the three warriors their ships – frigates, Gladion thinks they are – their weapons and their intellectual support, and by the early afternoon of the next day, Moon, Gladion, and Hau stand in front of ten Blackring ships, all of them loaded with cannons and harpoons.

Moon watches the vessels with a proud smirk. "Look at those beauties! I can't believe we're gonna go all out on a ship war– just like the old times!"

"This is nothing like the old times!"

Hau regards the ships with the stark opposite of Moon's enthusiasm: he grimaces, a step back from everyone else as he braces himself for what's to come. "Dude, those ships look hella' pretty… but are we gonna go fast? Are we gonna take it slow? Though I'm maybe gonna pass out the second we set off, just a warning. How are we gonna do things, by the way? Do we get a ship for ourselves? Maybe each in one ship?"

One of the pirates approaches him, calm. "We can give you a pill or two for that stuff. We got some people who get all jittery on boats too; y'all are kinda weird."

Hau nods, swallowing a lump of nerves; Moon observes the ships with keen attention. "If each of us is gonna get one, I want," she points at one of the frigates, completely identical to the rest around it, "that one. It's by far the prettiest one."

The swordsman spends two seconds surveilling the ships, then turns to her. "Moon, they are all identical."

"No, they aren't– you just have no eye for ship aesthetics!"

All ships are the same in Gladion's mind, and as long as they work equally to one another, he doesn't care much about their aspect– well, there's one with a red and black flag that has called his attention, but that's a matter for a whole other day. The number of masts and the sizes of the sails are similar or identical, and none of the pirates accompanying them have made any remark about the matter.

"You three can spread around however you wanna. We're just gonna take you to the Blackring Keep and help you fight the fleet that will come out of there– though Moon might have more experience on that field than the two of you, so a little lesson for you two is in order," says the girl they had talked to before. "We'd usually let the boss give us details for these operations– he's great at that stuff, but we obviously can't rely on him now."

"Hm." Two fingers under her chin, Moon turns to her desired ship. "Then, I wanna take that one and lead the way."

"You can't lead the way," Gladion comments. "You don't even know where the way is."

Moon waves that fact off, stepping a little closer to the ships. "Beats me. As long as somebody tells me where to go, I'll be fine. I just wanna go first in case some dumb marauders wanna crash heads with us. I'm not gonna let any of you steal the kill from me and that's final."

"You just look eager to get your ship destroyed and that sounds very dangerous."

Her eyes flutter indifferently, hands on her hips. Moon points a thumb towards Gladion and Hau. "Put those two away from me. The superstar can't travel along with people who will hold her down."

"Wait, when did we officialize that name for our group? I don't wanna be the trio!" pouts Hau, following Moon along while Gladion silently asks for a painkiller.

"We never did," grumbles the blond.

A shake of her head. "I'm officializing it now as we speak, so I'm traveling alone. I'm not gonna go slow and easy, so all of you better keep up with my crew and my ship. The superstar always comes first!" Moon turns to the buccaneers, smiling. "I guess I can't get a ship for myself, right?"

"How would you command the cannons without people to help you?" asks one grunt.

She grins in response. "With lots of courage and insistence! And a little bit of luck. Being quick helps, too– but you raise a fair point, I guess. As long as you all don't rain on my parade, we'll be cool," she comments nonchalantly. She turns to Hau and Gladion again. "This is gonna be so much fun! We have never done this stuff in the sea!"

Gladion is aware that her idea of fun is tremendously extraordinary, so he decides to humor her. "I'm slightly concerned with this, though. Is the route to the keep safe?"

"It should be. We might find the fleet of the boss and a pair of sea monsters, but that's nothing our cannonballs can't handle," explains one of the grunts, arms folded. "The boss knows nothing about our, um, grand mutiny, to call it something, so he shouldn't have called for reinforcements."

"If we meet up with some of your bad friends, can we blast them away and let them sink? Or can we deal with it personally?"

Of course, it's Moon who speaks, her tone all too pragmatic to not be serious.

"Cannonballs are preferred in this case."

"Aw, shucks," Moon sounds downcast; her face is anything but. "I guess we should get going then, right? I can't wait to get to the keep, it sounds like the coolest place ever!" Moon cracks her knuckles; the noise is a bit too loud. A grinned smirk fills her cheeks. "Also, sorry to inform you that I can't wait to kick your bosses' ass."

"The feeling is shared, Miss," says one of them. The people surrounding the grunt nod in overwhelming agreement. "We're thankful for your help. Don't go too over the top with it. Let's keep it at a mild ship war and the rest should come easy."

"That's low-hanging fruit for her," grumbles Gladion, sighing. "We will do as much as we can. We aren't especially fond of any of you, but your help is also greatly appreciated."

The girl from the previous day nods. "We aren't fond of people like you either, but we gotta knock some sense into that guy's head. Be it violence, be it a cannonball to his head. We can't aim for that guy with the weird blue hair, but we'll save as much as we can."

Hau nods and triumphantly raises a hand in the air. "We're gonna kick his ass real bad! He'll never see us coming!"

Moon huffs a chuckle. "Considering there will be a little committee tracking us down for Plums' sake, they're gonna see us coming one way or another– but we're gonna sink those ships like we're playing chess! This is gonna be awesome!"

Gladion doubts that this will be half as fun as Moon is envisioning it, but as long as she doesn't crash her ship with his, everything should be fine.

[antiquecompass]

Untamed Fest Day Thirty-One

Because Halloween.

Dad’s birthday parties were always an event. Part of it was because, well, Halloween. Part of it was because Papa spoiled Dad most days, but especially around his birthday. And part of it was that nothing made Dad happier than to be surrounded by the people he loved gathered together and having a good time. His dad’s fortieth birthday plus Halloween plus them holding it at their huge mansion that some of his fellow classmates now called ‘the murder house’? 

There was no way it wasn’t going to be an extravaganza.

He’d overheard kids bartering homework, various contraband Lan Academy sweets, and actual money for invitations and while he wanted to explain to them that honestly, they could just stop in for candy and to wish his father a happy birthday, Jingyi actually tackled him to the floor when he tried. 

So it was going to be an interesting night, to say the least.

Especially since half his classmates still thought his house was actually haunted. 

There were still a few hours before the party’s start. Last minute touches were being applied to the decor. The catering company had taken over the kitchen. Family were starting to arrive, taking over the guest bedrooms and bathrooms as they donned their costumes. 

And Dad? Dad was trying to negotiate for just a little more drama. Poor Uncle Cheng had been nominated as he keeper while Papa played host long enough for Dad to finish his costume.

“You’re going to make me explain this one more time, aren’t you,” Uncle Cheng said. He took off his hat and placed it on the table covered with all sorts of make-up pallets, brushes, sponges, and wipes. “You can’t have a fog machine inside because it will possibly damage your very beautiful, very historical home.”

Dad frowned and then yelled when Uncle Xuanyu pinched him. “Stop!”

“Then stop moving and ruining my work,” Uncle Xuanyu said. “Unless you <i>want</i> to look like the White Rabbit after he’s been mauled by the Jabberwock?”

“That could be cool,” Dad said.

“No,” Uncle Cheng said. “The peachicks are here. You promised Yanli you wouldn’t scare them.”

“Or Jingyi,” Sizhui piped up from his place on the couch, waiting for his turn at the make-up station.

Dad had chosen an Alice In Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass theme for his party. He accepted any interpretations and adaptations, as long as they were on theme. If they were off theme, they were forced to stand at the gates all night and do Trick-or-Treater Duty. They gave out full-sized candy bars and all the local kids knew it. Candy duty was an all night affair. 

Dad had picked the White Rabbit for himself, Papa would be the March Hare. Auntie Yanli got the Queen of Hearts, with Uncle Zixuan as the King, and their younger children as the guards. Jin Ling and Zizhen had picked Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. Uncles Cheng and Xichen had gone the Syfy Alice route, as Hatter and Alice. Uncle Xuanyu was the Cheshire Cat, with a truly impressive face full of make-up to get that smile. Uncle Huaisang had picked the traditional Alice and Uncle Mingjue the Caterpillar. Jingyi was happy to win the role of the Dormouse by default and Sizhui got the honor of being a more traditional version of the Mad Hatter. 

The grounds had been decorated to look like the Queen of Heart’s garden, including an opportunity for guests to paint the “roses” red. An entire croquet court with flamingo-esque mallets was set up near the old oak tree. There was an outdoor dance floor that resembled a chess board. Tables of various sizes, some normal, some gigantic, some miniature, lined the porch and the hallway and the dining room containing various bottles of drinks and cookies and cakes. Their rarely used formal dining table was decorated to look like a neverending tea party, tea pots of all different designs and mismatched cups and saucers placed on nearly every available surface. The entire main floor of the house and the grounds looked like a different world. 

Uncle Huaisang had truly outdone himself this time. 

Though Uncle Cheng had helped him and Jingyi stuff his parents’ bedroom with garish ‘Over the Hill’ birthday decor. None of them would dare ruin Uncle Huaisang’s hard work and aesthetic, but they couldn’t let this birthday completely pass without some mockery.

Dad shifted and rubbed his left arm. “I still can’t believe you hit me forty times,” he complained to Uncle Cheng.

“Forty-one,” Uncle Cheng corrected. “And you’ll get your revenge next year.”

“I’m going to use a bat.”

“You can certainly try.”

“Okay, you’re done. Get out of my chair,” Uncle Xuanyu said. “Sizhui, come on down.”

Dad looked dignified with his white wig and bunny ears attached to a top hat, in a rich red and black brocade coat, with a large golden pocket watch and chain. His make-up truly made him look rabbit-like, not like a cartoon version, but unsettlingly close to a human-rabbit hybrid, especially with the pinkish-red contacts. Once again Sizhui had to marvel at Uncle Xuanyu’s skill.

Dad smoothed down his coat and looked to Uncle Cheng.

“Fine,” Uncle Cheng said. “You can say it. Hop along and go find your husband, birthday boy.”

Dad grinned. “I’m late. I’m late. I’m late. For a very important date!” He stumbled into Uncle Xichen. “Nice dress,” he said, breaking character. “The blue, of course, suits you, And I’m stealing that jacket.” He then waved. “No time to say, ‘hello!’ ‘Goodbye! I’m late. I’m late! I’m late!” 

“I thought he was only supposed to have decaf today,” Uncle Xichen said as he sat, dusting a speck of dust off his boots.

“He whined to your brother about a headache and needing caffeine, so Lan Zhan went to Starbucks, in full costume, to get him an atrociously large coffee full of sugar and who knows what else,” Uncle Cheng said. “I got him through his make-up session. He’s his husband’s problem now.”

“But what if he goes outside to test those croquet mallets?” Uncle Xichen asked.

“Fuck,” Uncle Cheng said scrambling up and running out of the room.

Sizhui tried to stay still as Uncle Xuanyu did his make-up, he really did.

“Who gave that fucker a trumpet?” Uncle Cheng’s voice spilled into the room as he ran after Dad down one of the garden paths. 

How was Sizhui not supposed to laugh when all Uncle Cheng got in response was the opening notes of Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy?