#I need an intervention..

[syreok]

hes just a littol bird, a squishy littol guy

[starcurtain]

Teyvat's "Most Down Bad" Award Goes to Alhaitham for a Second Year Running

Seeing everyone making fun of Alhaitham for his "stalkerish" tendencies in this event is funny, because I feel like a lot of people missed that "Be literally everywhere Kaveh is" has been Alhaitham's MO from the day Kaveh appeared in the game.

From only grabbing his house keys after Kaveh returned from the desert (he couldn't have had both sets of keys at the end of the Archon Quest unless he went home and got Kaveh's copy) to ditching conversations to get back to his house only after Kaveh came home, to showing up without any warning or explanation in Kaveh's hangout with some ridiculous excuse about hearing his voice through noise-cancelling headphones... Refusing to offer any help in the Temple of Silence story quest other than staying in the library with Kaveh...

Since when does Alhaitham willingly cover anyone else's duties?

But this trend of "Be everywhere Kaveh is" didn't start when they were adults. It was already in place when they were still Akademiya students--and it's a trend that didn't end even when they had their fight.

Even when they weren't speaking, Alhaitham dogged Kaveh's every step through published responses to Kaveh's research articles in academic journals. He insisted on keeping a line of communication between himself and Kaveh open, even if the only way to do that was through very public ideological clashes. Pulling Kaveh's pigtails to get his attention lolol. It's implied that, for at least the few years between their fight and Kaveh moving in, this was the only communication between them--Alhaitham's refusal to allow their connection to entirely fade away. (And the fact that this is revealed in Kaveh's character stories--through his precious journal that records the moments of his life that had the most impact on him--shows just how deeply he values the fact that Alhaitham didn't give up.)

Another relevant side note: Alhaitham never asked Kaveh to give up his half of their house. Knowing half of it belonged to Kaveh, knowing that Kaveh may one day want to reclaim his part of it, knowing that it was listed as theirs, Alhaitham moved into the house and made zero effort to change its ownership. He was completely fine with living in "his and Kaveh's house." The stories suggest it was only months later (or even longer) that Kaveh even noticed he had the house, and he transferred away ownership of his portion without Alhaitham ever asking him (or even seemingly wanting him) to do so.

Please, let that sink in. Alhaitham actively left his grandmother's (presumably comfortable) house to move into "his and Kaveh's house," with no apparent explanation for why, and after doing so, he made no attempt to change that "his and Kaveh's" label. He moved into the house with no promise that Kaveh wouldn't show up on the doorstep the very next day and move in too. It almost feels like another deliberate provocation--I've moved into our house, are you going to come stop me? LBR, if Alhaitham had had his way, Kaveh would have been living there with him from Day 1...

There's also the fact that Kaveh literally can't write on a single message board anywhere in the entire nation of Sumeru without Alhaitham hunting his messages down and responding to them (which absolutely no one else does, by the way).

"NUH-UH!" "UH-HUH." "NUH-UH!"

Alhaitham's own character stories tell us explicitly that one of Alhaitham's defining character traits is "He is never where you need him to be," yet somehow...

Shot, and chaser:

Any time Kaveh is in the slightest bit of need or danger or just wants Alhaitham near, Alhaitham is "coincidentally" exactly where Kaveh needs him to be, whenever Kaveh needs him to be there.

Alhaitham didn't just "happen" to run into Kaveh in Port Ormos, an entirely different city from where he was supposed to be working. He didn't just "happen" to read the same terrible book as Kaveh when we know he otherwise would not waste a moment of his time on poorly-written literature...

He didn't just "happen" to appear when Kaveh was upset and needed a distraction in the House of Daena during Kaveh's hangout. He didn't just "happen" to be sitting around waiting when Kaveh needed answers after the Archon Quest. He didn't just "happen" to find Kaveh's academic publications and every single message board posting and respond to them at length and in public.

The only person for whom Alhaitham just "happens" to be available is Kaveh, over and over and over again--because he is very deliberately making himself a constant presence in Kaveh's life.

Which is exactly what Kaveh's mother told Kaveh he needed.

(Like, out of all things, I think people really underestimate the devs deliberately paralleling the romantic relationship between Kaveh's mother and father with Kaveh and Alhaitham's relationship. If you want to point to one thing that says "These two characters are intentionally queer-coded," it doesn't get any more obvious than this.)

Alhaitham, are you not embarrassed to be this transparent??? 🫣

[sentientsky]

greetings, beloved. i have just returned from my visit to the office of the psychiatrist you picked out. don’t look at me like that, daniel, it went fine. everything is fine. we’re all fine. why is your eye twitching, beloved? regardless, after she attempted to diagnose me with several disturbances of the mind, i promptly made her aware of the fact that her husband intends to leave her for the clinic’s receptionist. it was with very little effort that i was able to induce weeping. before long, i, i was the one behind the desk. are you not proud of me, my darling? for, i was maître once more. maître of mental health. beloved you cannot be upset. stop pinching the bridge of your nose. no. no remove your head from your hands. look, my love, i made her pay me a sum of one hundred and fifty dollars for the hour. i can buy more robux now, daniel. isn’t this delightful

[polarsirens]

Ace Paralegal: Emergency Powers

[peoplesprincessgeorge]

f1 + txt posts = true 13.0

[proxycrit]

Me thinking about honses.

(Are they gods? Or unfortunate magical experimentations? When did the world blink, and they’ve grown— but not old, nor wise?

At least they’re sisters, and they have each other.

At least.

At least.)

Anyways here’s my doodles for a possible luna and celestia! They’re ancient alicorns, ascended during a great war that would later shape equestria as a primarily pony continent. (The modern alicorns are made with love. The ancient alicorns are made with desperation. Nightmare Moon and Daybreaker are not accidents.)

[furiosophie]

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 4: Deranged Bedfellows

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4.5)

[rowanisawriter]

this conversation is even more insane when you remember that achilles is like ten feet away right out of this frame, is it his eternal punishment to hear these two idiots in complete denial getting loudly divorced DAILY forever

[madbard]

All my respect and appreciation to the artists and writers who show Stan reminding Ford to get some sleep, but the sleep schedule aboard the Stan O’ War II would be so incredibly cursed.

On the one hand, we have Ford “Gets So Fixated On Whatever He’s Investigating That He Ends Up Working Until He Literally Passes Out, and Was Also On the Run for Decades With Few Opportunities to Rest” Pines, on the other we have Stan “Became Essentially Nocturnal For Thirty Years, Running a Small Business in the Daytime and Rebuilding a Portal At Night, Relying Mainly On Naps” Pines.

The two brothers with the worst possible sleep schedules are now in the middle of the ocean with nobody else for comparison.

Yeah, neither of them are getting the recommended seven hours.

[theminecraftbee]

i think incidentally that tango loves complaining about the ravagers being dumb, right. and the ravagers LOVE killing tango. but the moment anyone else is like "oh the ravagers are stupid" "i hate the ravagers killing me so much" he's like. NO THAT IS HOW THEY SHOW THEIR LOVE. PUMPKIN LOVES YOU, ACTUALLY. THAT'S WHY SHE CHEWS ON YOUR BONES. do you understand the vision,

[kashiomi-art]

Fem Astarion sketchdump because.., i needed this okay...

[spinaholi]

the giddiness i felt when the bad kids started heckling porter for being a terrible teacher just like they did to goldenhoard for being a libertarian in freshmen year. like. these kids will not let shitty adults mess with their best friends!!!

[cardboardmoon]

Optimus had hammered in the necessity of staying hidden from the outside world. For their own safety, no one but the Autobots and their human family could know of them. They were instructed to stay away from Jasper during the day and not to do anything that would draw attention to themselves.

Two hours later, Thrash accidentally became the leader of 100+ sheep.

Inspo

(Doing a practice run on a simpler style so it’ll be easier for me to update during school)

[stormyoceans]

CERTIFIED WAIST GRABBER PHUM

[jinikaris]

‎ ‎ dominATE hyunlix moments ───‎ ‎♡ ⋆｡˚ 1 // - ✧ Seoul D1 [x]