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idontplaytrack · 5 months ago

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Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

AJ Campos x chronically ill fem! reader

Warnings: coarse language, descriptions if chronic illness + symptoms, smut ending

Reader’s significant moments in life while being ill. And only having the one person who’s always been by her side.

I just wanted to write this after hearing that one part of song trending on Tiktok. Evidently triggered some memories I tried to push down🤐

July.

“Hey, you’re not in school, babe?”

“No, I’m not feeling too good.” You told her honestly.

“I’ll be by after school with your work and some things for you, okay?”

“Okay, thank you.” You told her, swallowing thickly when you felt another wave of pain hit you.

“See you later, babe. I love you.”

“Love you, too.” You answered, she hung up. You put your phone down and curled up into a fetal position in your bed where you stayed until she got here later that day. Well, you fell asleep, but there you still were. In that same place all day, practically.

Your Mom peeped into your room a few times but as always, like it’s been for the past month or so, she’s been checking in on you less and less. You don’t blame her, she’s done all she could. No matter what, you were still in pain.

You’d just walked out of the bathroom down the hall from your room when you heard AJ’s voice come from downstairs. You stood at the top of the stairs, waiting for her. You were happy to see her. Locking eyes with you, she smiles, picking up her pace.

When your constant hospital visits started to happen, she didn’t exactly question it, or your change in pretty much everything. She just went with the flow, quietly helping you in any way she could. The girl was observant, she doesn’t say much, but she knows a lot about what’s going on without being told explicitly. Like how, you’ve been to the hospital three times in the last month. Each time being sent home with no answers and same medication. Like how, after every hospital visit, the light in your eyes seems to dim more and more. Like how, it takes anyone more and more effort to make you smile. She knew you’d be faking at times, she knew you were going through a lot that she couldn’t exactly understand. A part of her wanted to know more but she knew you weren’t ready to share. Another part of her also knew you couldn’t tell her much— you didn’t know a whole lot about what was going on with you. Every day since four weeks ago, she wishes that you hadn’t gone to the clinic that morning. That’s how this whole situation started. The doctor discovers you had a lump in your stomach, and sends you to the emergency department that evening to get checked for what he thought was appendicitis. Spoiler alert, it was not appendicitis. It apparently also wasn’t anything.

That one supposedly straightforward visit to your regular doctor for a missed day at school due to an upset stomach was the very beginning of a terribly long fight. You didn’t want to share that much with her seeing that you had only started dating her three months ago, and yet, here she was with you, without any complaints while you were moody and ‘sick’.

~~~~~

“AJ?” You managed to say, “I can’t do it. Will you come pick me up?”

August. You nearly fainted at your summer job because of a sudden pain in your chest, freaking out your coworkers and shift leader. Which prompted them to send you home. They asked you to go see a doctor, but you didn’t want to. Of course. Why would you go back to those people who laughed at your pain?

“Sure, baby. I’m on my way, okay? Sit down, I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

Thankfully, you worked near home so it didn’t take long for her to come by. Once she saw you, however, she immediately had the same idea as your coworkers. “You are so pale.” She points out.

“They’re not gonna find anything.” You said flatly.

“Your chest hurts. And you nearly fainted, I’m not joking with you right now, y/n. This has to be checked out.”

“Would’ve been dead by now if it was anything that serious.” You sighed, looking out the window as she sped towards the nearest urgent care.

Because of your symptoms, you were prioritised. And were seen fairly quickly, but you were still pissed off because again, you were told there wasn’t anything they could do but let it improve on its own, with the help of that one kind of medication they seem to love giving you. Three hours, one x-ray, physical exam and EKG later. They say, “It’s just an inflammation of the cartilage of your ribs. It’s self-limiting and should go away within a week or two. Just try not to do too much of what triggers the pain for you.”

You bite back a scoff. ‘Great, now I can’t go to work too?’

AJ sensed that you were upset so she didn’t talk to you for the ride home. Your mom sees you walking in with a bag of the meds and stops you to ask what happened, you didn’t want to talk, because you knew you’d lose it and start screaming so you handed her the bag which also contained a memo from the doctor so she could read it for herself.

“Oh.” You heard her say while walking upstairs. That was it, nothing more. She didn’t say anything else. Nothing. You hear footsteps behind you: AJ’s. You knew. “AJ, go home.” You told her as calmly as you could.

She doesn’t say anything to you but continued to follow you to your room. “Change your clothes.” She hands you a baggy t-shirt and your favourite pair of shorts. You changed out of your current outfit without resistance, simply doing so in silence. Next, you climbed under the covers and closed your eyes…trying to ignore the lingering ache and not-so-occasional waves of pain in your ribs. While you tried to drift off, AJ stays awake for a little longer, going on the internet to find out more about this diagnosis of an inflammation of one’s ribcage cartilage.

AJ couldn’t find out too much more of what she hasn’t already been told, but she did read that some people find that heat or ice helps. So she kept that in mind to have you try out the next day. Which you appreciated, but didn’t exactly show it. The lack of sleep made you terribly irritable. Still, she made sure you at least tried using the heat pack. It gave you some relief allowed you to get a couple hours of good sleep. AJ’s comforting back rubs similarly lulled you to sleep, but you made sure to ask for cuddles for when you woke up.

“Sure, baby.” She smiles, stroking your hair while you laid on her, heat pack on your back, currently kept in place by AJ’s hand.

~~~~~

August came and went without too much trouble apart from the ribcage pain flaring up two weeks after it died down the first time. September was oddly calm for you, but nothing prepared you for the atrocity that was October. Hours of waiting in the ER for test results, waiting for a proper bed but ending up sleeping in the ward corridor for the entirety of your stay. Having to leave the hospital one morning to take an exam, then go back to the hospital to be readmitted so you could wait for more test results. Which were inaccurate. Until you came back in a second time after getting discharged just a week prior. “You’re saying, your previous hospital did not keep track of the growth?”

“They said it wasn’t necessary.”

“And why?” Your new doctor was baffled.

“Because they ruled me crazy and every doctor since then saw that in my file and decided I was. And that I was there to avoid my life and responsibilities.”

“The ‘lump’ is the size of an egg, y/n.”

“Well, what could I do? My parents chose to listen to those doctors instead of me. I would too, because it is crazy, everything that I’ve had to put up with.”

“We need to get a biopsy done as soon as possible to determine whether it’s malignant or not.” Your doctor says.

“Okay?” You sighed, “Tell my parents that. They will be thrilled to have to spend more money on me.”

The panic didn’t set in until you were in bed for the night, at AJ’s. You somehow just needed her with you, and it didn’t click in your head why. You told her everything that night. Everything. Through tears and all, but she listened attentively, eyes never even leaving you for a second. Once you stopped talking, she took you into her arms and just held you until you stopped crying, rubbing your back comfortingly.

“You will always have me by your side. Okay? Always.” She says softly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

You sniffled, “I’m sorry. That was a lot.”

“You never have to deal with that alone, y/n. I’m here. I’m your girlfriend. I’ll always be here for you. I promise.”

Her declaration only made you cry like a baby, practically inconsolable. “You’ll be okay.” She whispers, “Hm? I’ll make sure of it.”

Words were just…words. Nice to hear, but realistically, what could she do? She was your age. She’d just be a companion, be there for moral support. You didn’t think it was fair to put her through this hell of yours, you were ready for her to dump you. But she did the opposite of what you were expecting. That night, you were simply emotionally exhausted and just crashed, almost immediately falling asleep in the safety and comfort of her arms. You couldn’t even resist it and tell her no, that it wasn’t supposed to be like this. That you shouldn’t be her burden as well.

~~~~~

Your parents left to go on a business trip two days after your biopsy. Which, the doctor said it was perfectly fine because it wasn’t a major procedure, per se, it sucked not having anyone around just in case. It was now the end of October, weather was getting chilly and you were anticipating another flare up of your pain in the ribs. You hadn’t talked to AJ since the morning of the biopsy and you didn’t plan to any time soon. You just didn’t want to. You didn’t feel like dragging her on further in the mess of a life you now had. She hasn’t texted you since two nights ago, anyway.

You were suddenly pulled out of your thoughts when you heard a string of knocks on your front door. Lazily getting up to go open it after vaguely seeing a familiar face in the peephole, AJ walks in. “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit.” You told her with a straight face, “I’m in pain all over somehow and bloated from all the gas they had to pump into me to separate my bowels from the location of the tumor. So I’m nauseous. But hey, you don’t need to know that. You shouldn’t need to know that.” You went off on a tangent about how she shouldn’t be caring so much because you couldn’t give her much, how she should just go live her life instead of spending so much time with you moping around.

“y/n, you are so—”

“I’ve heard it all already, you don’t have to tell me again: ‘whiny, weak, disgusting, lazy, stupid, crazy’. Take your pick, AJ.”

“What?” She stops you, holding onto your wrist, you flinch because of a bruise left by failed IV plug setting attempts.

“I don’t need love. What I need is a fucking break from this fucking life that’s turned into some sort of survival game.” You scoffed, “Let go of my wrist.”

She immediately loosens her grip, watching you with eyes filled with pure concern and heartache.

“I have been poked and prodded probably hundreds of times in my week in the hospital. Most I’ve ever had been in my entire life, I’ve never felt more worthless because of how much of my dignity I’ve thrown out of the window. I cried to my nurse, my mom found it hilarious. I was in pain, trying to sleep when some other patient started spewing their guts so I got a panic attack. My mom scolded me for it, she didn’t want to be there. She wanted to be at home. I’ve never spent so much time away from home, my family. People who were supposed to care about me. They left me there alone, the first chance they could. No one texted me to check on me, I felt like I was just abandoned there. Then you come in here and do everything the opposite— I don’t know how— to take it. I can’t— I can’t do this to you, AJ. You deserve better than this.”

She started to cry the more you revealed to her, absolutely heartbroken and horrified by nearly every word you said. Still, she tenderly held your face in her hand, swiping your tears away. “I love you. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have been anywhere with you if I didn’t.”

You shook your head, swallowing that painful lump in your throat, backing away from her.

“Listen to me and remember what I’m telling you.” She stepped forward, looking at your hands then taking ahold of them, “I love you. I don’t care what the fuck life throws at you, I will be here for you. I can’t take your pain away but I will do whatever I can to make your day better. If you need anything, if you need me there, call me. Text me, show up at my door. I don’t care. You are not alone. You are not going through all of this alone. I care. I fucking love you, y/n. Don’t give up.”

The rest of that day was a complete blur. You cried until you couldn’t and probably passed out. In her arms, yet again. When you woke up again, the sun was about to set. “Hi.” She greets you with a smile. “Hi.” You mumbled.

“What’s the matter? Do you feel sick?” Instantly, she picks up on it, rushing to your side.

“A bit. I don’t know why—”

“It’s okay.” She rubs your back, leading you to the couch, kicking the plastic trash can to your feet in the process.

“I don’t want to.” You sniffled.

“I’ll be right here, baby.” She says softly, still rubbing your back, “I got you, you’re okay.”

The sickening feeling kept building up, and it eventually gets to the point where you could no longer fight it. Bending over, you spilled what little you had in your stomach into the bin. Tears pricked at your eyes and fell against your will, your arm splints your sore procedure sites and stomach. AJ was not the least bit fazed, continuing to rub your back and tell you that you were fine. You got that bin out of your sight as soon as you felt okay enough to not need it anymore, then, she was beside you again. “Do you think you can stomach some water?”

You shrug, curling up in a corner of the couch and staring into blank space. “Popsicle?”

“Okay.” You exhaled, “I’ll…I’ll try.”

She got you comfortable in her embrace, flipping through TV channels for you to get your mind off things. You wanted nothing but her, being in her arms was the best feeling you could ever have.

~~~~

Over the next year, you suffered from two recurrences of the tumor, or disease— used interchangeably by your doctors. And so you and AJ have become incredibly familiar with the processes. Pre, during and post-procedure. You detested the familiarity, you’ve had enough. You were numb at this point, but now had a fear of hospitals and having to be admitted. Some days, you questioned it all. But AJ was there to make sure you were okay. You also made sure she was okay on days where you were feeling better. You were surprise to have made it past a year with AJ, but you were feeling so immensely grateful for that girl. She was your rock through it all…someone that was once a stranger, was now the single most important person in your life. Your parents were there, but only because they had to be there, because they had to sign the papers, to pay for the appointments and procedures. They may ask how you were, but you could tell they weren’t willing. And you got that, you would be sick and tired of that too. You couldn’t blame them, but you were hurt.

This day marked your second clear MRI scan, no sign of recurrence. You were the happiest you’d been in awhile, once home, you immediately attacked her with a kiss which turned into a heated makeout session. Then, more.

“Are you sure?” She asks, palm resting on your stomach.

“Yeah.” You confirmed, “I want this.”

“Okay.” She agrees. “Sit up, and lean against the headboard okay? I don’t want to hurt you by straddling you.”

You do as she tells you to, and she starts to pepper kisses all over your body. Every single inch of it, slow and gentle and so, so loving. AJ was practically worshipping your body, it made your head giddy with pleasure soon enough. Smoothly, she slide of your shorts and underwear, then your shirt. It was clear she wanted to do more, and she did. “You okay?”

“Yep.” Your breathing hitches when she starts to suck at a certain spot on your neck. She picks up on that and keeps working that spot over.

You exhaled harshly, “Fuck.”

“Is that good, baby?”

You nodded, throwing your head back more to allow her easier access. Her hand makes its way to your chest, pushing your bra down on one side, she decided to give your tit a squeeze. You yelped, chuckling eventually. She grins, pinching your nipple and easily drawing out a soft moan which she quickly swallows with a kiss, “That’s it, baby. Let me hear you.”

Fuck.

The wetness between your thighs becomes so noticeable, it made you terribly shy. So much so that when her hand finally makes its way down south, your cheeks were flushed with a deep red hue. AJ laughs, “Aw.” Her middle finger teases your folds as she speaks, making you whimper, rutting your hips against her hand needily. “Let me do the work, baby…” She purrs, “You just sit there and make those pretty, pretty noises for me? How about that?”

With that being said, her hand leaves that area between your legs. And she presses a trail of wet, passionate kisses to your torso. Knowing that your scars were all in plain sight to her made you feel a little…ugh. But then again, she was driving you nuts cooing and complimenting everything about you. No one’s ever made you feel so wanted. “Hey.” She says quietly, “Look at me, baby.”

“No.” She licked your lips, looking up at the ceiling while she was on her stomach, face comfortably between your legs.

“Look at me, honey.” She repeated, “I get that it’s hard, so I don’t want you to feel like you have to finish. Or do anything more than this. I can stop. Alright?” Her hands caresses your inner thigh, you feel that warmth. You’d sobered up a little, but enough to fight the desire for her to make you climax. For the very first time. You locked eyes with her, she looks at you, patiently waiting for an answer. “Keep going.”

“Yeah?” She asks, hand squeezing your thigh lightly. You simply give her a nod, she instantly starts to work you up again, then you soon feel her fingers teasing your entrance. She pushes one in smoothly, hooking it upward to hit your sensitive spot inside. You whine softly, she keeps doing it and you got louder. Once you felt ready, in came her second finger without a hitch.

“Just…just like that.” You moaned, “Oh, God, AJ—”

“Keep going, baby. Sounds like music to my ears.” She says lowly. Oh, shit. That really made you feel something.

With her fingers steadily pumping in and out of you, and her thumb hitting your clit and just the right amount of pressure. You were closer then ever to that climax, feeling that fluttering in your core.

“I— oh, my God— oh— so good, fuck.” Your hips start to lift up, and she pulls her fingers out. You objected with a whine. But not for long, because holy shit, she puts her mouth on you. You saw it, you felt it. But you couldn’t exactly believe it. It felt like you had ascended into an entirely different dimension. How gentle she was. The warmth, the closeness. Her gaze locked in with yours. You were going feral, and becoming like putty beneath her without much effort. Your mind was emptied, and filled with nothing but the need to come. The need to feel more of her.

You twitched in her mouth, feeling yourself clenching around her fingers. She groans at the abrupt tightness but then grins, picking up her pace just enough to chase your high. Your knuckles turn white from gripping the sheets, breathing slowly getting heavier by the second as you approached the edge. You feel the coil tightening quicker and quicker, until you just had to let it go. “AJ, I’m gonna—” You couldn’t even finish your sentence, toes curling as you unraveled, “Shit—”

She begins slowing down gradually to let you ride out every last wave of it, eventually caressing your inner thighs and peppering kisses all over them before working her way up to your lips while wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand. “That was intense.” You laughed deliriously.

“I know.” She cracked a smile, “Do you feel alright?”

“Mm, yeah.” You hummed, kissing her again. She cups your cheek, smooching you again too. “That was amazing.”

She grins, “You were pretty fucking amazing.” You blushed, she said, “Oh, look at that.”

You chuckled in response, she slowly eased you onto the mattress properly so that she could cuddle with you. “I told you. You’ll be okay.” AJ says, “And you are. No matter what, I’m always here.”

“I don’t say this enough and I’m so sorry.” You snuggled closer to her, “Thank you. For everything you’ve done for me, for every minute you’ve chosen to spend with me. You mean the world to me and I can never thank you enough. I love you so much.”

“I know you do, baby. I know. Don’t be sorry about things you can’t control. I know you love me, you may now tell me that but you show it one way or another: making sure I don’t sleep through my alarms even on days where you’re not feeling your best, making me a drink, my favourite meal, running me a bath…just about anything you do means so much because I know how much effort and energy it takes you to do them, but you still do them. You still wake up, most days by my side, living another day. You are so strong, my love.”

“Fuck.” You laughed but end up in tears, “I love you, AJ. I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you more, honey.”

🏷️ Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128

💭 A/N: I wasn’t sure if I wanted to post this fic because of how personal (and traumatic) some details are. It started off as a draft for me to vent, but I simplified most of it and decided to share it after all. Hope it wasn’t too much🤧 ok g’night, I’ve got work tomorrow afternoon and it’s past midnight🤡

#auli'i cravalho #aj campos #aj campos x reader #crush(2022)#hulu crush #reader insert #x reader #female reader #reader imagine #gxg #wlw #sickfic #vent?#sfw wlw #queer fiction #fanfiction

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under-the-cherrytree · 2 years ago

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TW: sa

Hello! Can i have hanako yashiro and uhhhhh teru. With s/o that came late to their lunch meeting up all crying because they got tricked with the firetruck game(i see them all not knowing this game) and since they can’t explain through their crying they show a tiktok for an example.

U can ignore if it makes u uncomfortable have a nice day/evening/night!

Hanako, Yashiro, and Teru with a s/o who gets tricked with the fire truck game❣︎

Warnings: sexual assault, bad thoughts, sensitive topic,

A/n: hello! I will never ignore this and i want you to know that!!

I’m so sorry if this happened to you, you don’t deserve that at all and I understand the feeling

I do hope things get better and I hope you know you can talk to me!!

Ily!!<33

I hope you have a great day or night and enjoy!!

Hanako looked at the clock passionately waiting for you to enter. You are ten minutes late to your meeting and he didn’t know where you were. Kou helped him prepared a lunch for you and he couldn’t wait for you to get here! He was just about to go look for you when you came into the room, tears running down your face.

He felt his dead heart sink when he saw your face.

“S/o… what happened, why are you crying?!” He placed down the box of food and rushed to you, cupping your cheeks.

“I- I just-“ You couldn’t stop crying. Tears were running down your face and you could barely talk. Your chest was heavy and your eyes swollen.

“Hey… It’s okay..” he hugged you tightly and stroked your hair. He wanted to calm you down so you would breathe normally. “I wont leave your side… you can tell me when your ready”

You wiped your tears away and took out your phone and went into tik tok. Whenever your eyes filled up with tears to the point you couldn’t see, you quickly wiped them away and continued searching for what you were looking for. Once you finally did, you pulled up a video and showed it to Hanako. It was describing the fire truck game.

Hanako read it in shock, hugging you tighter.

“Don’t tell me that this happened to you…” His voice was filled with sorrow “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you..!” He cupped your cheek and kissed your face, wanting you to stop crying.

“I promise, I will always protect you… I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything..” He stroked your hair, letting you cry on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry my love, I’ll make sure they never look at you again.”

- He was quite protective of you after this

- He always had a wisp following you in school just in case something happened

- He just wanted to make sure you were okay

- And about the person who touched you…

- They just went missing!

- Hanako was very happy about it, but he doesn’t know where he could have gone!

- At least he says he doesn't know

- He just wants your safety

- He loves you more than anything

Yashiro hummed as she skipped down the hallway looking for you. You were supposed to be at lunch twenty minutes ago but you never never showed up. She looked through each classroom for you, starting to get concerned.

“Y/n?” She called out and she soon heard what sounded like crying. She made her way towards the noise and found you trembling.

“Y/n!! What happened?!” She ran to you, her eyes wide.

“Nene…” You looked at her shocked before wrapping your arms around her.

“I- It was- terrible-!!” You cried, staining her uniform.

“Hey, hey… it’s going to be okay…” She whispered to you. You pulled out your phone trying to hold back tears as you clicked on tik tok. You looked up the fire truck game and showed it to her.

You didn’t even need to explain what it was. She already knew.

“Oh my gosh… I-I’m… I’m so sorry, Y/n!” She hugged you tighter, kissing your cheeks.

She felt her heart sink in her chest at the thought of what could have happened when she wasn’t there. She wanted to throw up just thinking about it.

“I’m so sorry…” She whispered to you, finding it hard herself to form words. Your body continued to shake, biting your bottom lip hard.

“Y/n.. please know this isn’t your fault… You did nothing wrong!” She cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead. “I’m so sorry something like this happened to you… I’ll do whatever I can to make it better.”

- She isn’t the best at comforting you but she will try her best

- She will do things to distract you

- She just wants to see you smile

- She will take you out and treat you

- And she will take care of this guy too.

- She will tell Aoi what they did and she will ruin his reputation

- Aoi is very popular

- She might even ask Akane to teach him a lesson he will never forget

- Yashiro just wants to help, so if you tell her not to, she won’t!

- She isn’t necessarily strong herself

- But she knows people who will take care of this person for her

The bell rang and Teru stood up from his seat and walked out of class before anyone could talk to him. He had a meeting with you so he couldn’t wait any time. He walked to the rooftop where you two agreed to meet but to his surprise you weren’t there.

He sat for a few minutes enjoying the view until he started to get concerned.

“Where are they…” He muttered but before he could think anymore he heard the doors open. He looked to see your figure and he smiled softly.

“There you are… I was looking for you-“ He stopped talking when he heard sniffling. He narrowed his eyes and saw that you were crying, his heart sinking.

“Y/n..! Are you hurt?!” He asked you in a panic, rushing over to you and searching your body. However, you backed up from his touch.

Your eyes were puffy and red and tears fell down your face.

“Y/n… what happened..” He said softly, trying his hardest not to freak out. You shook but you soon gave into his touch, feeling comfort in his arms.

You tried to speak but you couldn’t form any words, they just turned into sobs. You pulled out your phone and looked up the firetruck game on tik tok and showed it to him.

He carefully took the phone out of your hand and read it, shock going over him.

“Don’t tell me…” He looked to you “Who did it?”

You stayed silent, still shaking.

He knew you probably wouldn’t talk at the moment and he needed to comfort you.

“It’s going to be okay… please don’t cry..” He cupped your face and wiped your tears away. “I promise I will protect you… He won’t touch you ever again.”

- He is very protective of you after this

- And he will find out who did it one way or another

- And that person will be given a warning

- However, if you are still hurt by it even after the guy apologized, he will kill them

- He doesn’t want to be possessive, but people like that don’t deserve to be in the world in his eyes

- To do something like that to you is unforgivable

- He just wants you to be safe and happy

- Thats all he wants for you

#tbhk #toilet bound hanako kun #tbhk x reader #jshk #tbhk anime #toilet bound x reader #hanako x reader #hanako kun #jshk x reader #jibaku shounen hanako kun #yashiro x reader #yashiro nene #tbhk teru #teru minamoto #teru x reader

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softluci · 3 years ago

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hello yes can i just say i l o v e d your gen z hcs and may i acquire more

for starters, i am not religious, but i am PRAYING you don’t think i was ignoring your ask. i’ve been thinking about it since i got it, it’s just that i’m a college student with worms for brains, so hopefully you understand. this is something that i’ve had on my mind for a long time [i’ve been at this on and off for months], and it most definitely can be associated with/attributed to gen z.

for a fleeting, wonderful period of time, there was a trend on tiktok that went, “buss it, buss it…” are you familiar?

that should be enough of a summary, right? ah—for future reference, “o7” is like a saluting emote, for anyone who might not know. reader is g/n as usual, enjoy!

[a/n: so because this is so long, this part is going to be, like, the lore, and then the actual headcanons will be right here]

trendy

the two things most corrosive to the human spirit are easily named—capitalism and boredom. while it would be easier and less taxing to explain the former, the latter was the problem at hand. it’s not that there was nothing to do in the devildom—quite the opposite, actually—it was just that you wanted some time to yourself every now and again. the trouble with trying to take time for yourself in a completely new location, the residents of which are always enamored with you in one way or another, is that there isn’t anything to do. the house was full of adventures for you to take—the trap door under the rug in the library, the other trap door under the dining room table, the small door behind the couch in the living room, and whatever other poorly hidden doors your seven roommates thought you didn’t know about.

trouble was, you didn’t want to leave your room. you, intelligent creature that you are, knew that the chances of you running into mammon or satan or beel or asmo were all too high, and even higher were the chances of you agreeing to spend time with them if they asked, and you knew they would. what were you to do?

you stared at your ceiling from your bed, d.d.d. resting on your stomach as you let your mind wander. your d.d.d. was full of things for you to do, the devildom’s ethernet at your fingertips, but you weren’t interested in finding new things right now. you wanted something familiar, like—like your phone.

what was the point of lucifer taking your phone, anyway? it’s not like you could use it—being here rendered it a useless brick of glass and metal, so it wouldn’t have been a big deal if you still had it. it was funny, though, that you couldn’t use your actual phone when it was still possible to access the human internet from down here.

at least, you assumed so.

how else would levi be able to keep up with his human idols, get tickets for their shows—the works, you know? luckily, you were fully capable of asking.

d.d.d. now in your hand, you rolled onto your stomach and found your messages with levi, nails clacking against the glass as you tried to reach him.

hey, you texted, can you help me with something?

his reply came faster than you expected: ?? what do you need

how do i access human websites and apps, you asked, rolling onto your side. you know how to, right?

lololol, it’s not possible :p

a grunt, more aggravated than you’d care to admit, escaped from the back of your throat.

don’t lie.

a few minutes passed with no response, and you wondered if you were too harsh.

“he’s a sensitive guy,” you mumbled, inhaling deeply. “i probably came on too strong or something.”

just as you started typing out an apology and a, “forget i ever said anything,” you got a response.

a vpn and a proxy site.

a smile crept onto your face as air came out of your nose, the closest thing to a laugh you could muster.

can you set it up for me?

after another few minutes of no response, you sit up, wondering how you could’ve possibly fucked up a second time, your d.d.d. buzzed.

levi sent you a file and a link, with a host of instructions.

click on the file and it’ll take you to the vpn you need to download. don’t worry about bugs or anything, i made it myself.

you let out a low whistle, flopping onto your back once more.

“this guy gets up to more than i thought,” you said, eyebrows raised. “someone get this man some physical affection.”

you continued to read, growing more fond of him with each sentence.

once you install it, pick the country whose network you want access to. from there, you’ll have a list of that country’s most used applications available for you. again, don’t worry about bugs.

what’s the link for? you asked, excitement getting the better of you.

for when you download internet applications. it’s added security, paste the link in before you search anything or you’ll trigger the firewall alarm.

you blinked.

you’ll trigger the what?

i’ll trigger the fucking What?

levi’s response was the fastest one yet: the Fucking Firewall Alarm. barbatos’ design. he has no idea i know how to bypass it. just do what i said. don’t try to solve any potential issues on your own, come to me for everything.

roger that o7, you replied, thanks levi ^_^

yeah, yeah. come to my room for a hxh binge tomorrow night.

you snorted. what a fucking nerd—in the greatest way possible.

of course bestie :] ily

ily2 normie -_-

in his room, unbeknownst to you, levi felt like he made a mistake of some kind. it’s not that he didn’t trust you, it’s just that you had a tendency to end up in undesirable situations, even if it wasn’t always on purpose. he was probably just worried over nothing, or so he tried to tell himself, but whatever. this isn’t even about him.

you sat up once more, this time leaning against your pillows as you started setting everything up. everything went so quickly that you barely wondered if all of this—subverting hell’s firewall, personally designed by a man eerily similar to a 2D crush from when you were in middle school—was worth accessing a few silly apps from the human world.

a few minutes later, your d.d.d. now a much, much cooler copy of your phone, any and all thoughts of regret and hesitation were absent from your mind.

your first order of business on your upgraded d.d.d. was logging into your tiktok account, however surprising it was that you even remembered the password. you put your headphones in and adjusted your volume, going back into the dumpster fire that is your for-you page with open arms.

after around half an hour of stifled laughter and small, offended gasps from being targeted by the algorithm, you came across a rare dancing video. the person on your screen was in casual clothes, making minor, silly dance movements as the music dwindled, only for them to drop into a squat in time with the music, suddenly dolled up. you shot forward, taken aback by their transformation and by their dancing post beat drop. did you watch it on a loop for a few minutes? well, that’s nobody’s business but yours. you clicked on the sound in hopes of finding similar videos, and much to your relief, there were plenty. about ten videos in, a smile still on your face, you got an idea.

you slipped your headphones out, arbitrarily looking around your room, before whispering to yourself, “i could—i could do that. i could totally do that.”

and you were right. you had nice clothes and makeup from various shopping occasions with asmo. your room had led strips, courtesy of levi ordering the wrong ones and being so kind as to give them to you. you could do it.

levi was the only person you’d spoken to since you retreated to your room a few hours ago, and the lights have been off the entire time, which meant that if you worked quietly enough, everyone else had reason enough to assume you were asleep. good! how could you possibly explain what you were doing getting all dolled up at, like, 11:00 on a wednesday night? you couldn’t, even a little bit—not in a way that convinced anyone, anyway.

come midnight, you were sitting cross legged on your bed, watching your final product. not to be vain or anything, but you were looking very respectfully at yourself. since when could you move like that, anyway? the wonders of being alone, you supposed.

you didn’t post it publicly, electing to save it as a draft just so it would save to your d.d.d. maybe you’d post it once you were back in the human world, when your friends wouldn’t swarm your comments asking where the fuck you were.

yeah, lucifer told you, “everything was taken care of,” but regardless of whether or not you believed him, you knew it wasn’t a good idea to risk finding out if he missed something.

boredom creeping up on you again, you elected to go through the messages on your d.d.d. it would be better to make yourself laugh before you were fully bored again, right? you stood up and stretched, opening the group text with the adults. luke doesn’t know about it; he thinks the one with everyone is the main one, and everyone lets him think that so he feels included.

walking around your room in small circles, you scrolled up to the older conversations and read through them, rolling your eyes and chuckling to yourself. very rarely did they talk about anything of importance. it was mostly diavolo, barbatos, and simeon making quips and jokes at lucifer’s expense for everyone to see. it was gold in its purest form.

you contemplated sending one of the many cursed things sitting in your camera roll, just to keep them on their toes, but just after opening your gallery, you resigned not to, figuring it would be best to leave him alone.

you stretched again, the hold on your d.d.d. a bit looser this time. it nearly slipped out of your hands, but you caught it, tossing it onto your bed. as soon as you resigned to start getting ready for bed, you turned back around and picked it up.

there was no rhyme or reason to your actions; if someone in that moment were to ask you why you did it, you would’ve said, “just ‘cause.”

human intuition is a wonderful thing.

your d.d.d. was still on, still open to the group chat. you’d sent something, evidently a second ago, as indicated by the time stamp. the thumbnail was of you, in casual clothing—the casual clothing you were wearing before you got dolled up, actually. huh.

huh.

the weight of your mistake came crashing down on you in full force, a chill sinking into your skin and running up your spine.

you were suddenly acutely aware of the concept of time, how it was of the essence and you had absolutely none to waste.

what were you to do? it wouldn’t be long before your favorite person saw it. you had to do something.

you could say nothing. you could tell the truth and say it was an accident and that you were embarrassed, but that was even worse than saying nothing because it meant you were set to be the target of teasing you didn’t even wanna try to imagine. you could say it was an accident and be confident about it, telling them, “enjoy!” but that was a dangerous game to play, and you knew it.

well, i do admire you for taking time to think, but, unfortunately, there was a checkmark next to your message. oh, a number as well—eleven. you just can’t catch a break. what were they all doing up at this time, anyway? it was a school night🤨.

#FUCK #this took FOREVER im so glad im done #one day i'm gonna know how to write consistently i promise #i hope u enjoy!#obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me!#obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor

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heartbreakgrill · 4 years ago

Text

Found Me a Lover; Calum Hood

a/n: literally nothing special, but I was feeling fluffy. 18th Valentine’s Day alone 😃

description: you and your man celebrate

You scrolled through Instagram, liking and commenting hearts on your friends Valentine’s Day posts. You skipped past random celebrities you followed because it would be slightly weird if you would comment heart on their posts. Occasionally, you’d repost someone’s adorable couple photo on your story for your followers to also gush over.

Duke lay happily on your thighs, head tucked into your elbow as your fingers lazily pulled through his fur. The television played the LA morning news, reciting some stories of homicides, house fires, and the occasional, heart warming love story. You shut off your phone and stared at the tv. You were barely paying attention, still tired from just having woke up.

You heard footsteps traveling down the hallway and peaked around the back of the couch. Calum, hood up and sweatpants lazily hanging off his hips, shuffled into the kitchen. You heard him pouring a glass of coffee before he rounded the wall and came in by the tv stand. You smiled at him, affection ready to ooze from your tongue.

He plopped onto the couch beside you, tossing his arm around your shoulder. A wet, fat kiss landed on your cheek, his breath smelling of coffee and sleep. Duke abandoned you for his dad, who made baby noises at him. You snuggled into his neck, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Calum recited the corny, capitalistic holiday slogan. “How long ya been up?”

You shrugged, “About ten minutes. Didn’t want to wake you.”

“As per usual,” he snickered. You simply tossed a smile in his direction before comfortable silence became you.

After a little bit, you stood up to go get ready. You didn’t do much, just washed your face and brushed your teeth and changed your sleeping pants to your lounging pants. Quarantine intruded on having any actual plans for Valentine’s Day, so you were planning on just doing what you normally did: Lay around.

Calum followed along not far behind you, rejoining you on the couch with a glass of water and a poptart. He held out the pastry to you and you snapped off your preserved half. You gave Duke a small nibble.

Calum swallowed, “Hey, I know we can’t do much. But, what if we just got dressed up?”

“Miss seeing me in a dress, huh?” You teased.

He winked at you, “Just a little.”

“Yeah, we can do that. Did you have plans for dinner?”

“Just figured we could order in,” Calum nodded.

Your two love languages weren’t acts of service, just quality time together. So, most Valentine’s Days were spent together, at home, sometimes with fancy dinners at night. You’d exchange gifts, but never did too much.

“Sounds good. It’s not too chilly, so maybe we could sit outside and turn on the fairy lights and stuff,” you recommended. He nodded.

Another thing about the two of you was that neither of you enjoyed surprises. You always planned. You knew already that he would be proposing, and you knew it wasn’t going to be in public. Hell, you were already technically engaged, he just hadn’t given you a ring. You knew you’d be getting married in the summer. You knew that, for your birthday next week, he’d be taking you up to San Francisco for a picnic by the bridge. Planning made you both feel safe.

Calum nodded. You lay on the couch for the rest of the day. At one point, Calum left you to go workout, then he showered, and moved to his music room. You joined him there, sitting on the mini couch with Duke as his dad worked on a song he would pitch to the band. You showered after a bit and then started getting ready.

Calum came into the bedroom while you were in the middle of putting on foundation. He smiled at you through the mirror of your vanity, making you blush. You went back to blending your makeup as he found an outfit. Calum connected to the speakers in your room and shuffled the playlist the two of you shared on Spotify: “You are everything.”

It was formed not long after you started dating, but titled six months into your relationship. You had started binge-watching The Office together, and in one Jim and Pam’s final scenes, Jim says, “Not enough for me? You are everything.” Naturally, you titled it as such.

Soon enough, you were done with your makeup. Calum had since propped up against the headboard, playing on his phone and sometimes glancing at you. When you passed him, your song came on. You had never really had one, but a few months ago, you had watched a TikTok edit of Calum and a song talking about someone who plays the bass. You showed it to Calum, who fell in love with the premise of the song, and wouldn’t stop playing it. Everytime he did, he’d drop whatever he was do it and pull you close, rocking to the beat.

You stopped in your tracks and turned to your boyfriend. He raised his eyebrows cheekily at you, reaching out a hand. You pulled him off the bed, hands finding their place on his shoulders. He grabbed your waist.

“And then I found me a lover who could play the bass, he’s kinda quiet, but his body ain’t.”

You giggled as Calum spun you around quickly. He pulled you back into his chest, dipping you to the floor. Your hair whipped in his face, and he nearly ate a chunk. He spit it out, his expression hilarious. Laughter rang from the two of you, as your bodies parted slightly. He held your hand and you began jumping to the best of the chorus.

Once the song finished, Calum pulled you into his chest. You kissed him gently, fingers gracing the bottom of his jaw. He spun you away towards the closet, emitting laughter. You found your red dress, the one you had planned on wearing to their album’s release party. He’d seen it before, since you’d put on numerous “I’m bored, I need something to do,” fashion shows.

Still, though, when you walked out of the closet, barefoot and casual, Calum grinned widely. “I am literally so head over heels for you. Like, if you asked me to go to kill Luke, I might consider it.”

“Do it, I wanna date Sierra,” you challenged.

“Oh, no, you don’t,” Calum tsked, enveloping you in his arms. “Let’s go eat.”

“Oh did you order already?”

“Yeah, I think it just came in,” Calum’s hand slid down to your fingers, grasping them between his. He led you to the front door, where your food was on the porch.

You helped him pick up everything and set it up on the patio table. The pool glistened under the glow of the string lights, a warm breeze blowing ripples through the liquid. You moved your chair next to your boy, sitting criss-cross, though you were in a dress. Calum looked over at you, a bright smile caressing his cheeks and lips. You swept his hand into yours, and though it slowed your eating, you didn’t care.

It wasn’t anything special, but it was enough.

Tag List: @mantlereid @boxofteenageideas @dinosaursandsocks, @ashhdaniellee95 @stephaniemelvie @zhangyixingxing1 @verlaneswiftie13

#5sos fanfic #5sos fluff #calum hood #calum hood imagine #calum hood x reader

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charlies-gillespie · 4 years ago

Text

reminence | charlie gillespie

paring: fem!reader x charlie gillespie

summary: reader stays the night in a hotel but there are no rooms. her ex, Charlie, overheard her talking and offers reader to spend the night in his room

length: mediumish

rating: PG

warnings: none

!! NOT MY GIF !!

MASTERLIST

You get out of the Uber you took to get here from LAX. You thank the driver and get your suitcase out of the trunk of his car. You drag your suitcase and dufflebag into the hotel that you plan in staying at tonight. It’s about five and the lobby is kind of packed. The parking lot was pretty full. You get in line at the desk behind a couple and their child.

The desk receptionist hands the couple a key and they walk off. You approach the desk with a smile and say, “Hi, my name is Y/N L/N and I booked a room here for one night.” The desk receptionist nods and types on the computer.

She makes a face and says, “I’m sorry, Miss L/N but that was our last room available.”

Confused, you say, “I called three days ago and made a reservation for a room.”

“I am all out of rooms tonight, I apologize,” she says. “If you’d like to stay and wait in case someone checks out then you can. I thought we had more than one room available for tonight.”

With a sigh, you open your mouth to say something until you hear someone go “Y/N?” behind you. You turn your head to see Charlie Gillespie standing behind you. You blink at him. You haven’t seen him since he broke up with you almost two years ago after a three year relationship. His hair has gotten longer and he’s gotten ... cuter.

You say, “Charlie, wow. It’s been a long time.”

Charlie approaches you and asks, “Are you staying here tonight?”

“I was going to but they just gave away the last room when I called three days ago reserving a room,” you say. “Why are you staying here?”

He says, “I flew in from Canada yesterday and have been staying here until my friend gets back from Canada so I can stay at his place. Wait, did you say that they don’t have anymore rooms?” You nod. “You can stay with me tonight. I have a second bed in my room that you can use.”

With a smile forming on your lips, you say, “Thank you, Charlie.” The desk receptionist hands you a key to Charlie’s room and the two of you take the elevator up to the fourth floor.

When you’re on the elevator, you take a second to look at the man next to you. His hair was much shorter than it is now. He’s wearing a blue and white button-up shirt that’s a little big on him and the top three or four buttons are undone, revealing his chest. He wears khaki shorts and converse sneakers.

The elevator dings and you get off with Charlie, who leads you down the hallway to his hotel room. He uses his key to let you both in and he lets you walk in first. You look around the room. The bed he probably slept in last night is a mess and isn’t made. There’s a shirt thrown over a chair at the little circular table. A coffee mug sits on the table between the beds.

“It’s a little messy but I wasn’t expecting company,” Charlie says, closing the door behind you. “Sorry.”

You smile and say, “It’s okay. It’s not like you need to impress me or anything.”

Charlie chuckles a bit and says, “I can run and grab us some food while you unpack. I know you probably had a long flight and probably need real food.”

“Yes, please,” you say. “Are there any McDonald’s around here? Or Taco Bell?”

He grabs his wallet and asks, “Your usual from either?” You nod in response. “I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes then.” Charlie leaves the room and you sit on the neatly made bed.

Sometimes you don’t remember why your relationship with Charlie ended. He’s a sweetheart, even after not seeing you for two years.

Your mind wanders while you unpack some of your clothes, putting them in an unused drawer. You check the minifridge to see what Charlie has. He just has a few cans of soda and a few water bottles. You sigh and sit back down on your bed.

Charlie walks in moments later with a Taco Bell bag and two drinks. He sets everything down on the little table and says, “Three soft shell tacos, Nacho Fries, and a Baja Blast. After all this time, I still know your regular at Taco Bell.”

With a laugh, you get up and say, “It’s not that hard to remember three soft shell tacos, Nacho Fries, and a Baja Blast. But thank you, Charlie.”

He smiles as you take your food, your drink, and a few napkins before sitting with your legs cross on your bed.

“What do the channels look like here? Any good ones?” you ask, opening one of your tacos.

Charlie shrugs and says, “There’s HBO we can watch. I know know what movie is on right now. Let’s check though.” He plops down on his bed with his Crunchwrap Supreme and his own Baja Blast. He grabs the remote and scrolls to HBO. He puts the channel on and you recognize the movie as Five Feet Apart. You look at Charlie and he switches to a static filled channel. “Not that one.”

Five Feet Apart was the movie you and Charlie watched the day before your relationship with him ended. You saw it in the movie theater a few weeks after it came out. You haven’t been able to watch it since.

Quickly, Charlie scrolls through the guide and puts on Friends. “This is a good compromise,” you tell him. “We both love Friends.”

“It’s one of the greatest shows ever,” Charlie says enthusiastically.

You laugh and say, “You made me watch this show so many times when we were together. The theme song always got stuck in my head after we watched it.”

Charlie swallows the bite of his Crunchwrap that he took before he asks, “Do you know how much Grey’s Anatomy you made me watch?” You laugh. “We’re even, Y/N.”

After swallowing a bite of your taco, you say, “You made me watch un ungodly amount of Friends, Charlie. It was everyday. I only made you watch Grey’s on Thursdays when it aired.”

He chuckles and says, “Okay, you got me there. You made me watch a lot of TikToks though, Miss L/N. You spent hours showing me videos.”

“You were laughing so I didn’t stop!” you say, jumping to your defense. “Remember that one time we tried making a TikTok by dancing to Obsessed by Mariah Carrey. It took us hours because you couldn’t learn the moves.”

Your ex laughs and says, “I did learn the moves eventually though. I still remember them.”

You finish your taco and says, “I wanna see this. Show me.”

Charlie smiles and gets off the bed. He stands in front of you and starts to do the Obsessed dance from TikTok. You laugh as you watch how badly he does the dance.

“For a musician, you have no rhythm,” you tease.

He sits back down on his bed with a sigh as he says, “For a small person, you eat a lot. I don’t know where it goes.”

With a laugh, you say, “I have no idea where it all goes either.”

It feels nice to laugh and talk with Charlie. Neither of you have spoken to each other since you broke up in late 2019. Just seeing him again has made you really happy. You didn’t think you’d see him again. He’s still his crazy self that he was years ago.

Both of you finish and you sit back against the headboard of your bed with a pillow behind you. You’re watching and laughing with Friends even though you’ve seen this episode a thousand times.

Charlie sudden asks, “Do you remember why we broke up?”

You look over at Charlie, who’s laying in the same position that you are, and say, “We just grew apart after high school. You moved down here part time after you graduated and I still had a few months left.” Charlie graduated early, you still had six months left. You were 17 when you and Charlie started dating at the beginning of your senior year of high school. He had just turned 17 right before the school year started. You were 20 when the relationship ended and Charlie was just about to turn 21. It wasn’t quite three years when you broke up but it was close.

He says, “I tried to make it work with us, Y/N. You know that right? Between living down here and acting, I did try.”

“I know you did,” you tell him, sitting up and looking at him. “It just got tough for both of us. We ended things on good terms.”

Charlie nods and says, “We did.”

You blink and ask, “What have you been doing since we broke up? Focusing on music, I hope.”

With a little laugh, he says, “I was on Netflix.”

Almost surprised, you say, “I didn’t know you were on Netflix, Charlie! That’s incredible. Was it a show or movie?”

“A show,” he says. “It’s called Julie and the Phantoms. We’re still waiting to be picked up for a second season but we trending in the top ten for a little bit on there after the show dropped in September last year.” Charlie tells you all about his time on set. He tells you about the show too, and you’re happy to hear that he was able to do two of the things he loves to do while being on the show.

You smile and ask, “Can I hear a song from the show? I know you have a guitar somewhere in this room. You never go anywhere without one.”

Charlie laughs and says, “You’re right.” He gets up and opens the closet door, pulling out a guitar he has stashed away in there. You laugh and shake your head. You know him too well sometimes.

He sits at the end of your bed and you cross your legs, looking at him. He pulls the guitar out of it’s case and he grabs a pick. He tunes the guitar before he looks at you.

“The song I’m about to play is song I wrote with my co-star, Madi,” he says. “It’s called Perfect Harmony. I may or may not have been kind of thinking of you when coming up with the lyrics.”

You smile and say, “Awe, I didn’t know you were such a romantic, Charlie.”

A laugh leaves Charlie’s lips as he begins to play the chords.

Step into my world Bittersweet love story about a girl Shook me to the core Voice like an angel, I've never heard before

As he plays, you sway to the music. You smile, having always enjoyed hearing his voice and watching him play guitar. He’d spend hours practicing or writing songs and you’d sit outside whatever room he was in or sit beside him while he sang and played.

Charlie looks at you occasionally as he plays, almost like he’s singing to you.

You set me free You and me together is more than chemistry Love me as I am I'll hold your music here inside my hands

You watch him intently, the smile never leaving your face as he plays. Hearing his voice again makes you so happy.

I feel your rhythm in my heart, yeah-yeah You are my brightest, burning star, woah-woah I never knew a love so real (So real) We're heaven on earth, melody and words

As he finishes up the song, you stop swaying and you look at him. Charlie finishes and he looks at you. He laughs a bit and says, “And that’s Perfect Harmony.”

“It’s beautiful,” you tell him. “And I’m not just saying that because you kind of wrote the song while thinking about me. I think it’s really good, Charlie. You’re so talented.”

Charlie’s face gets a little flustered and he says, “I’m just decent at guitar and decent at singing.”

You say, “You wouldn’t have landed a huge Netflix role if you weren’t crazy talented, Charlie. You know that right?”

He packs up his guitar and says, “You don’t have to lie to me like we’re still dating, Y/N.” Charlie gets up and puts his guitar back in the closet he took it about from. You get up and walk over to him.

When he turns around, he jumps a bit, startled that you were right there. You stare up at him and say, “I’m telling you right now that you are insanely talented. I’m face to face with you now so you can’t tell me that I’m lying.”

After a moment of staring up into Charlie’s eyes, he takes a step toward you. Your heart begins to race in your chest and you take a deep breath. You feel his fingers touch your hand and butterflies erupt in your belly. His callused fingers intertwine with yours and you gasp.

“Can I kiss you?” Charlie suddenly asks.

You nod slowly, tilting your head up. It’s been so long since Charlie’s kissed you, and you always loved his kisses. Whenever you were upset, he’d kiss your forehead or your cheek or your neck and you’d feel better almost immediately.

Charlie’s free hand comes up to your face, cupping your cheek. He leans down and ghosts his lips over yours hesitantly. You lean your head up as Charlie becomes more sure and crashes his lips to yours. You gasp softly before kissing him back. The kiss is slow and soft as you both take in the moment.

In the two years apart, you’ve never lost feelings for Charlie. You tried to date but it never worked out because you never were able to get over the only man you ever really loved. Being able to hold his hand and kiss him again feels heavenly.

Both of you stand like this for a few moments before you pull back, looking up at Charlie. He looks down at you and asks, “How long will you be in Los Angeles?”

You say, “I’m moving into my new apartment tomorrow. I just flew in a day early.”

He smiles and asks, “So you’re here permanently?”

“I’m here permanently,” you say, smiling. “So if you’re willing to try the relationship thing again then-”

Charlie cuts you off with another kiss, this one rougher than the last. You laugh as Charlie pulls back, saying, “Are you kidding? I’d love to try the relationship thing again. The only reason I’m staying with my friend is because I’m looking for a new apartment too.”

With a huge smile on both your faces, you wrap your arms around Charlie’s neck. You hug him tight and say, “Looks like we ended up finding our way back to each other.”

“Thank God,” Charlie says against your ear. You laugh.

You spend the night wrapped around Charlie in some way until you begin to fall asleep.

As you doze off to sleep, you hear Charlie begin to sing softly.

The truth is finally breaking through Two worlds collide when I'm with you Our voices rise and soar so high We come to life when we're In perfect harmony

A smile forms on your face as you snuggle against Charlie’s side, falling asleep in his arms.

#charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie fluff #charlie gillespie x oc #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie x y/n #julie and the phantoms imagines #jatp imagines #jatp imagine #fluff imagines #imagines #imagine #fluff #fluffy

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rachaelswrites · 4 years ago

Text

Party Time is Over

Noah Schnapp x Gyllenhaal!reader

You and Noah go to a party

Word Count: 2,247

A/N: I got a little carried but I really love this paring so please send in more ideas for them

Warnings: fluff, underage drinking/partying, brief mention of hickeys

You and Noah rarely got time to yourselves, in between his and your dad’s filming schedule. This weekend was the one chance Noah was in town with no work responsibilities and you wanted to surprise him. He thought you were still in London with Jake, but his project finished early and you got home that weekend. You’re really close to Noah’s whole family and especially Chloe, his twin. You asked her for his flight information and met him at the airport Friday night.

You were both extremely jet lagged and fell asleep as soon as you got into his bed. Chloe of course, saw and posted a picture of the two of you asleep. You and Noah didn’t post about your relationship often but when you did, fans went crazy.

You woke with one of Noah’s arms around your waist and his other hand occupied with his phone, scrolling through TikTok. “Good morning,” you mumbled while kissing his cheek.

“How’d you sleep?”

“Good,” you said sitting up and stretching your arms, “Much better than in London. Try sharing a room with my dad,”

“I can only imagine,”

“Sometimes I wonder if he stays up all night to make noise and make me miserable on purpose. Because if he is, its working,”

“I wouldn’t put it past him,” he replied, setting his phone down. He rolled over and sat so he was now facing you. He grabbed your hands and started pressing kisses to your knuckles, making you giggle, “So. What do you want to do today?” he asked.

“I dunno. Just spend time with you. Dad has a new project soon so I want to be with you as much as I can,”

“We can stay in and watch movies. Finn told me about some good ones I think you’d like,”

“Ok sounds good,” you kissed him and got up from the bed, “Let me shower real quick and I’ll meet you on the couch,”

You quickly showered and got ready. You changed into sweatpants and one of your favorite band tees, but as you were leaving Noah’s room, you spotted a hoodie that you wanted to steal. You slipped it on and made your way downstairs. Noah was wrapped in a blanket and was laying on his back. You walked over and laid down next him, placing your head on his chest and wrapping your arms around his torso. You looked at him, studying his face.

“What’s up Y/n? You’re staring at me,”

“Sorry. You’re just really handsome,”

“I look dead. I literally woke up like thirty minutes ago,”

“Still a cutie,” you mumbled.

“Aww. You two are so cute,” Chloe said from the kitchen. Noah stuck his tongue out at her which she responded with a middle finger.

You slapped Noah’s chest playfully “Stop bickering and start the movie please,”

“Fine,” he said going to Netflix, “I know you don’t like watching movies your dad is in, but this one is really good, according to Finn,”

“No this one is fine. It’s actually my favorite of his,” you watched as he pushed play on Wildlife. You watched a few more movies until you got bored. You stood up from the couch and walked over to the window, “It’s nice out today. We should go out,” you turned and looked at your boyfriend, seeing his expression, “or we can stay if you want. I’m just bored,”

“No, it's fine. I know you have the attention span of a goldfish,”

“Hey! It's not my fault,”

“I know. It’s one of the reasons I love you,” he said getting up and walking over to you. He hugged you from behind and kissed the side of your neck.

“Mm hmm. Sure. I love you too,” You turned in his arms and kissed him.

“I gotta go get ready. I’ll be down soon,” he said, pulling away.

“M’kay,” you sat back down on the couch and waited.

After ten minutes, you and him were walking hand and hand down the streets of New York. “Let’s go on the subway,”

“Why? Where are we going babe?”

“Let’s go to my place. We can find something to do there,”

Noah nodded and you two caught a train and took your seats. You were on the other side of the city so the ride would take a while. Your phone started buzzing in the pocket of your sweatpants, so you fished it out and answered it.

“Hey honey I got a notification that you left Noah’s house and saw that you were moving. I was just wondering what you’re up to,” your dad said.

“Oh yeah. Just on the subway,”

“You’re on the subway by yourself? You know I don’t like you going there by yourself,”

“I’m not by myself Dad, I’m with Noah. He’ll keep me safe. Right Noah?” you asked your boyfriend, he nodded. “He said he would. We’ll be fine,”

“Text me when you get off then,”

“Will do. Bye Dad,”

“Bye Y/n,” he hung up and you and Noah continued your conversation.

You got off at your stop and walked the few blocks to the apartment. You opened the door and greeted your dad, who was at the kitchen table reading.

“Dad we’re going up to my room is that ok?” you asked.

“Yeah just keep the door open and hands to yourselves. I don’t need mini yous crawling around here anytime soon,”

You rolled your eyes and went to your room, Noah following. You two just sat around lazily watching TV or scrolling through social media. Noah was sitting at your desk when his phone started ringing and he answered it. You were sitting on the floor by your bed and rolled over closer to him. “Hey what’s up man?” he asked. You tried to hear what the other person said but couldn’t make it out, “I would love to but I’m with Y/n today. I don’t know when we’ll see each other again,” he paused to listen to the other person, “I can ask her,” he lowered the phone and looked down at you.

“Do you want to go to a party later. Some of my friends are throwing one and they invited me. We don’t have to go if you don’t want to,”

“Are you kidding? Of course I want to go! For the past three weeks I have been stuck in London, spending the whole time in a theater or hotel room with my dad. Do you know how much I miss interacting with people my age!” you said, jumping up

“So is that a yes then?” he asked

“Duh,” you walked towards your closet to pick something out to wear.

Noah turned back to the phone, “I guess we’ll be there at six,” he hung up and watched you, “What are you doing,”

“Picking something out. I can’t wear this,” you gestured to your current outfit, “To a party. What do you think about this dress?” you held up a black mini dress, one you could find people wearing in a club, (nothing too revealing otherwise Jake would flip). Noah gave you a thumbs up and you changed in the bathroom. You came back out and looked for your favorite pair of heels.

“You look good Y/n,” he said.

You pulled on a pair of silver heels and responded, “Thank you. You do too,” he was wearing black jeans and a blue bomber jacket with a white shirt underneath. You grabbed a denim jacket to throw on over your dress. As you walked downstairs, you yelled to your dad, “We’re going out, I don’t know when we’ll be back,”

“Hang on. Where are you going?”

“To a party,”

“Be safe,” your dad said, pointing a finger at you, “No drugs and no drinking,”

“Ok I promise bye,” you waved to him and shut the door. That promise was not kept for long.

By Eleven, you were surprised you and Noah weren’t blacked out by now. You didn’t plan on drinking but it started with one drink, then two, and then too many more that you lost count. You only realized Chloe was there when she came over and pulled you from Noah. You and him had been dancing in the center of the room. His hands were on your waist and he was kissing all over your neck and collarbone, most likely leaving at least one mark you would find the next morning.

“Chlo Chlo! What are you doing? M’dancing with Noah,” you slurred.

“You’ve had too much to drink. Let me call your dad so he can come get you.”

You shook your head and tried to get away but she grabbed your hand, “Y/n come on, where’s your phone?” you pointed to the pocket of your jacket on the floor and she reached over and grabbed it. She saw you had several missed calls from Jake. Her grip on you loosened and you slipped away going to find Noah again. Chloe found you two again but this time you were making out. She separated you two again and led you to the doorway of the apartment you were in. “Your dad is here. Take your phone and jacket,”

She opened the door and walked you down to the lobby where your dad was. “Oh my God. Y/n what the hell?” he said putting his hands on your shoulders, “You smell like alcohol. How much do you drink?”

“I didn’t drink anything Dad. I told you I wouldn’t,” you said, very clearly intoxicated.

“Y/n,” he warned, “Tell me how much you drank,”

You started counting on your fingers but once you reached five and kept going, Jake had enough, “Ok I get it. Let’s get you home sweetheart. Can you walk?”

You shook your head. Even if you could, you didn’t want to. You had discarded your shoes two hours ago but your feet still hurt. “Ok. I’ll carry you then,” he helped you put your jacket back on and picked you up but was confused when you didn’t have shoes, “Where are your shoes?”

“I dunno,” you mumbled. Luckily, Chloe came back to the lobby with your shoes in hand.

“She forgot her shoes. Thought she might want them,”

“Thank you Chloe,” he took the shoes from her and carried you to the car. He set you in the backseat and tried to buckle you in but you kept slapping his hand, “Y/n stop. Let me put your seatbelt on,”

You stopped attacking him and he got in the driver’s seat and drove back to the apartment.

You managed to walk to the elevator and inside the apartment before collapsing on the couch. “Dad can you get me some water?”

“Sure,” he said from the kitchen. He filled up a glass and offered it to you. You swallowed it in one big gulp.

“Do you want to change out of that dress. I can get you some stuff from your room,”

You nodded and pulled a blanket over you. He came back carrying a t-shirt and shorts and tossed them at you, “Hey c’mon wake up.”

You groaned and got up and trudged to the bathroom. You changed and walked back out and flopped on the couch. Jake picked up the dress you left on the bathroom floor and headed upstairs to his own room, “Goodnight Y/n, I love you,” but you didn’t hear him because you had already fallen asleep.

You woke up the next morning with a splitting headache. The light from the kitchen was hurting your eyes and you felt a weight on your legs. You sat up squinting. You saw your dad using your legs as a laptop stand. Jake noticed, and looked at you, “Good morning sunshine,” he said cheerily.

You groaned, his voice ringing in your ears, “Shhh. Stop yelling. You’re being too loud,” you whisper-shouted.

“I'm not even yelling. I’m just talking,” he responded.

“Shhh. I have a headache,” you moved your finger to your lips.

“I figured you would. You partied hard last night. I left you some stuff in the bathroom,”

You rolled off the couch and made your way to the bathroom. He left you a bottle of Advil and Gatorade. You took the pills and took a drink of Gatorade. You looked at yourself in the mirror and you looked awful. You looked like a train ran over you three times. Your shirt moved and exposed your collarbone. You caught a glance and gasped. There was a huge hickey left by Noah. You had no idea how to hide it from your dad.

You left the bathroom and went into your room, searching for something to use. You spotted the hoodie you stole from Noah the day before and slipped it on. You went into the living room to join your dad. “Why’d you put a jacket on?” he asked.

You shrugged sitting next to him and putting your head on his shoulder, “Just got cold,”

“It’s not for hiding that giant hickey I hope. Cause I already saw that,”

You shot up, “What! When?”

“Earlier this morning. I went to see if you were still alive, I saw it,” he explained, “Don’t feel bad. I’ve seen worse,”

“Eww,” you said, smacking his arm, “I didn’t need to hear that,”

“I’m joking. Just next time you go out, don’t get wasted. I love you, but next time Noah can take care of you,”

“Sounds good to me,”

Taglist

@ssebstann @peachyprincessss @emmy-writes-sometimes @teenage-incompetence

#jake gyllenhaal #jake gyllenhaal x daughter #jake gyllenhaal x teen #jake gyllenhaal x daughter!reader #jake gyllenhaal x teen!reader #noah schnapp #noah schnapp x reader

192 notes · View notes

cyberdva · 4 years ago

Text

The Haunting Of Queen Mary's Castle- C.B ~P.1☆

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

Main Masterlist

Colby Brock Masterlist

Summary: Sam and Colby had the bright idea to drag their friends to Scotland, and where would the perfect video location be? How about Queen Mary’s haunted castle? It didn’t help that aspiring physic, Y/N wasn’t too happy to head out of the country, but Colby was there to help. And maybe he wanted something more than being there to help her. Could the spirits be on his side for once?

Word Count: 4k

Date Uploaded: 8/31/20

Warnings: Cursing

A/N: This fic is from the vault. I wrote this around January of this year, I start school again in two days and the work and stress load is going to be horrible, especially with it being half in person, half online. I hope to get some more creativity back when more pressure is put on me. I have plenty of ideas with just not enough passion and time. It’ll trickle back one day.

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

“Holy Shit…” Colby held his camera closer to his chest as he walked closer towards the breathtaking Neidpath Castle. It’s aura seemed to engulf the curiosity of the young man. His friends splurged on a ten hour trip to Scotland for a quick Youtube video series, he knew near the end, half of them would be begging to go home. The comical routine played its key role in every single episode, no matter what the occasion was. It did make good money to be completely honest. Although, that wasn’t the main focus of their careers. He found himself under a tall bridge-like banister connecting its way to the entire estate. Next to him was his long time roommate, Corey. He sported a bright yellow hoodie in large contrast with Colby’s black one. It was sort of funny, each of his friends had a unique personality, yet connected so well. Of course, they were wearing their own merch. It helped the sales go up, not to mention it was awfully comfortable. A perk to the business if you say.

“And we thought the church was cool…” Sam, Colby’s best friend and other handler of the videography series on their channel, gaped in front of him. This place was bigger than any other private plot they’ve ever visited! It was a couple thousand dollars to rent out for the night, but with the palace’s history it was born to make a hefty income.

“We have this all to ourselves!” Colby nudged Sam, he handed the camera off to his friend Jake, who was talking a mile a minute to the other attendees. A new face poked out of the regular bunch.

“Are you gonna catch me when I get scared, Y/N?” Jake stuck his face in the view of the content woman. Her persona seemed quite drained due to the long trip. She was partially new to the Youtube platform, especially with ghost hunting. Not like Y/N was easily frightened, unlike her friends, it just wasn’t her go to for a cheap thrill. Nerves were indefinitely strained, since it was the first time out with the entire group. Nothing Jake couldn’t fix.

Her laugh trickled out blissfully, ”Wouldn’t Tara get jealous? You don't want to get on her bad side? Do you?” He quickly shook his head and gave a hesitant reply with his sheepish smile.

“We get this all to ourselves?” Colby queried. This place was double the size of the Trap House by far, they had to be scared shitless by the time they left. There had to be some sort of restrictions or a down sided catch to it all.

“Did you do any research on this place?” Y/N slid up behind the unfocused main man, a small quirk to her. Colby jumped a smidge in light shock. He wasn’t expecting anyone to be genuinely interested with the property. Colby mentally cursed for being so jumpy.

“Jesus Y/N, you scared the shit out me.” He replied, not answering the girl’s question. Y/N met Sam and Colby way back in highschool. Each of them slithered their way into the other’s channels and have made frequent appearances. They definitely weren’t strangers, even though it seemed that way with fans. Y/N had more paranormal encounters out of all of the boys, despite a bit of distaste towards the topic. She was lugged around on long adventures to help them with videos. Some of her videos ranged from ‘‘accidentally’ joining a cult to “selling her soul”. She was the wicca-pedia they needed to not get possessed each trip.

“Ok pussy.” She walked off to talk to Corey, the pair oddly all had a strong connection from somewhere, and Colby sighed as to quickly put on his cheery online persona once more.

Sam waved up at a vacant window as the group, “Hello!” The woman replied unknowingly and aroused quite a shock of embarrassment. A faint giggling came from the couple in the back, “No,no, I do it better.” Corey got a hold of herself, “A Ra-Ta-Ta-tah.” The two burst back into their ceremonial laughs and briefed on about some TikToks they watched on the remotely silent ride from the airport.

Sam turned back around to see the shorter woman. Notwithstanding her first place in line, “How is he gonna get a kiss kiss? Very ugly to me!” The duo rounded up to each other and laughed on their way up the trail, leaving the others confused and focused on talking to the groundskeeper.

“I’m assuming you are the caretaker of this?” The blonde one waved more at the older woman. She seemed more on the reserved side and peeled her eyes at the sight of a camera. A lovely addition to the already uncomfortable scene.

The woman gracefully approached Sam, “Yes, Yes I am. My name is Katrina.” Sam went on with the lady into a dark back door. The young adults glanced on in uncertainty.

“Yo, why are they going off by themselves?” Colby asked Jake. The first rule of all of their videos was not to go off by yourself. Bad shit always follows. “He literally was like-”

“He’s been looking at her ass like all day.” Jake joked back, Corey attentively diverted himself from Y/N to get a jump in on whatever that conversation had morphed to.

“That’s whatever the fuck he was doing.” They all snickered and continued on with the inappropriate jokes. Editing this would be like a field day to Reggie.

“Is Kat gonna think…” Colby looked around jokingly, getting another round of laughter from the friends.

“I don’t know..” Colby softly replied. He pressed on to dumbfoundedly impersonate Sam’s girlfriend, “Oh it’s not cheating if he’s not in the same country.”

“It’s sexual relations Jake.” Y/N whispered at him. They continued to poke fun out of the cougar-lady, but her and Sam rushed back soon enough. Just in time to ask questions.

“Uh, that was pretty much the coolest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” Sam pulled everyone aside with a smug look on his face. He honestly always had one of those. The blank stares that were thrown back at him weren’t what he expected.

“Uh Sam what does that mean.” Jake chuckled. He looked around at everyone not able to catch on. The seriousness of the situation began to settle as everyone genuinely thought Sam could have done some weird shit with that groundskeeper.

“All I have say is that was quick man…” Colby scraped some gunk off of her nails while waiting for following instructions.

Sam obviously didn’t understand, “To fill you guys in I had to learn, kind of, where all the specific light switches were. I didn’t even look around. I just kinda looked at the ground until she saw.”

“You were like that’s the coolest thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life.” Colby turned the camera to focus on him and Jake mocking Sam’s slight happiness by seeing fancy rocks.

“It was only the stairs!” Sam said defeatedly, he didn’t want to spoil the real first looks.”That’s just giving you a little hint, but um, I asked her if she could you know fill us in on some of the information of, likewise castles here, the hauntings or any deaths and she said she knows some information.”

“Oh cool…” Colby was already quite unenthusiastic about this idea anyways. Katrina retreated out of the building quickly with keys in her hand. She sprinted over to all of them.

“Look it’s Sam’s new girlfriend!” Y/N cheered. Sam spun his head around, probably pulling a muscle in the process. The pure look of utter horror could not be more hysterical. Sam became flustered with a loss for words, his face tinted with a light shade of pink. Before he could muster up any sort of retort Katrina, the groundlady, came jogging back to the group.

“What’s some of the backstory about this castle?” Jake asked, he spun some rings around in his hand. Paying no mind to the other plot line adhering to his right.

“This castle was built in the second half of the 14th-Century, but there was another castle built before that in here. That was built in 110,so uh.” Few ‘Wows’ and ‘Oohs’ cut her off. “That was quite a while ago, but the Neidpath was built by the Family Of Fraser’s and they built a Buddha made castle. This one was burned down by the English army. After a guy named Simon Fraser, who’s the cousin of Braveheart, was captured and executed and that’s why the Buddha made the castle was burned to the ground. Another family built this castle, which was besieged in 1650 by the Cromwellian army. Legend says that this was the only stronghold of the Scottish borders which actually withstanded the siege. Whether it’s true or not, we don’t know, but what we do want you to know is that one-third of the castle collapsed, non-existing anymore.” She spoke with absolute passion. The place had so much rich history, the surrounding observers listened with extreme intent, not to miss one sentence in case it may help their investigation.

Colby raised his eyebrows at this question, “One-third of it?”

Katrina continued on, “Because of the siege. We do have a dungeon in the castle as well.” Everyone went silent.

“A dungeon?!” Jake nearly dropped a silver band he was picking on by the mention of this. His personality perked up and suddenly the whole crowd was uplifted. Finding weird places in “abandoned” areas is always a plus side, but this tops all of it.

“Guys shut up!” Y/N whacked Jake with her phone, he stuck his tongue out while rubbing his shoulder. She didn’t want to leave too bad of a first impression. It would be mortifying if something went wrong and the owner already hates you.

“Is there a dragon?” Corey brought everyone back to the topic of the castle, he didn’t want to be there a minute longer, but in this group you just do what you’re told and shut your mouth.

“We do have quite a big colony of bats under the roof, so I’m not sure if you really want to go down there Mister.” The group laughed and groaned at Katrina’s statement. Running into bats could be the worst thing to encounter.

Corey nodded in response, “So there are dragons.”

The history went on, “It was quite widely used during the 14th and 15th century because that was the only reason for the whole county.” The darker side of it all became slowly prevalent. It wasn’t just a posh place the others expected it to be.

“Prison?” Sam posed. This just got a lot weirder than they all expected.

“Yes. You’ll be able to get into it because there is this rough opening through, which was made in the 17th century, but before that the only entrance to the dungeon was through the trap door from the guards. I should have shown you that, but I’m not going to. You’ll find it by yourself.

“Oh god…” Colby rubbed the bridge between his nose, an inevitable headache was beginning to form.

Sam tittered, “Are we just going to fall through? Is that ok?” He got no proper answer, which set his worries on the run.

“So, the last prisoner was there in 1594, I think. We know there was a teenage boy like a 14 year old boy who was just pick pocketing people and he ended up here. The note didn’t say that he actually came out of there again.”

“Like meaning it’s haunted?” Colby preyed on.

“Uh, it is haunted!” Katrina stated blandly.

“Fun for us!” Y/N shrugged to hide her panic. Colby glanced at her. He sensed her anxiousness, he didn’t want her to be upset. Definitely not in the shitty environment. Of course, he cared for her, he just didn’t know how to open up and tell her. Would this really be the place?

“We do have our own one. Her name is Jean Douglas. She died in 1750, she was the daughter of one of the owners of the castle and she died of a broken heart.” The mood fell, a breeze pulled through and messed with the mics. Leaving just a sprinkle of static in the footage. Just in time.

“She was engaged to a young man, but he wasn't wealthy enough to win her family over, so he went abroad to win his fortune and fame and because he was away for far too long she went really sickly and pale and she didn’t eat. She didn’t sleep, so she was really frail when he finally came. When he was riding his horse through the archway she was at the window and he failed to recognize her because she was so altered and broke her heart and she died on the spot.”

The group had a silent reaction to the news, not knowing how to react.

“Ever since then she is walking through the castle being very tall, very gray, very pale looking, weeping.”

“What’s her name again?”

“Jean.” A tiny shiver racked through Sam’s body. He didn’t tell anyone. Just not to set anyone off. Now he really didn’t want to face this spirit.

“Have you ever seen Jean?” Y/N asked, trying her best not to be insensitive with the approach. These things are held really close to some people. Their experiences could be life changing, for others it could most certainly be a lot different.

“No, but I do have ghostbusters coming in several times a year and I asked what was the best recording ever and they were like ‘We got brilliant ones of screams.”

“Ah..”

“And I was like inside of the castle. I’m here sometimes on my own in the middle of the night at midnight, one, two, three o’clock. When I have to lock up after the events and such. Do I really want to do that with screams in my head? No I don’t, I said no.”

“Alright sounds like it’s a nice haunted Scottish castle.” Sam tried his best to play off his uncomfortable feelings with humor. It did not work.

“I’m going to do the dungeon now. I’m not telling you what I’m going to do now and then the place will be yours” Katrina headed back into the castle with an odd vibe.

“So, she’s gonna make us fall down the trap door, wow.” Jake leaned in for slight commentary.

“How much do you want to bet that we’re going to die?” Y/N grabbed her backpack to locate her wallet and pulled out a twenty.

“I bet 15.” Corey grabbed his wallet too.

“Guy, that is so sad though…” Colby came into the center of all of them, “Ok, that story. Imagine your husband comes home on a little horse and you're in this window, literally right there and then you die on the spot because he's like ‘Who’s that?’ It’s a tall, frail old lady that’s crying everywhere.” Colby clung to his sweatshirt, “Oh that’s so creepy!”

“Colby if you ever do that to me you’ll have to go back to VidCon alone again.” Y/N was putting in her best bet and threw a five at him. “You can use that for your ticket.” He blushed, just like Sam moments before.

Sam added more commentary from behind the camera, “They’ve heard screams within the castle.” Katrina came right back out with her deafening personality, handed the keys to Sam and hopped right back in her small, blue car, and left with no exchange of words.

“She creeps me out.” Jake in discomfort. To be fair, she is a creepy ass old lady who owns a castle in the middle of nowhere.

Corey turned away from the groundskeeper's car and shrugged off his jitters, "So we have a castle to ourselves...”

“This is amazing!” Sam couldn’t contain his excitement.

“No Shit. I still can’t grasp why you all buyout expensive stuff like a castle.” Y/N gripped the abundance of bet money and slid it all bad into her bag.

Colby inspected the property more in depth, as if he was waiting for a ghoul to poke out at any given time, “This is where we’re staying tonight.” With a grand motion upwards Sam panned the camera up and down.

“And you guys...” Sam pulled the camera away from the stronghold and directed the frame to the rest of his friends,”..have not even seen the inside at all.”

“I know, I know.” Colby pulled his beanie down his head, the enlightened sun seemed to cascade into the clouds with a faint breeze.

“Let’s go find our cottage, get ourselves completely set up and ready for the night. Take some pictures before sun down and then go into the castle, because like we can’t lose this sunset and we got to figure this out.” Sam did some weird hand movements in front of the camera and handed it off to the other’s opinions.

Colby nodded his head up and down in agreement,” Yeah definitely.” Jake wandered around with a rock and for the most part everyone said eye to eye.

“Unfair treatment. I wanted to go in now.” Y/N gave a side glance to Sam and Corey brushed his hand over her playfully. She walked back into frame,“All I gotta say is, Colby Brock Hot Edits.” Colby walked up next to her with a shit-eating grin in approval. Who doesn’t love Colby Brock edits?”

“Shut up, you’re just jealous that there’s no Y/N L/N hot edits for you.” He playfully jabbed back at her with a growing flutter in his stomach. He fucking hated that feeling to no end, but it was such a drug. Only when she was around.

“Alright let’s go, I’m bored as shit.” Jake came back with his new pet rock and put his arm around Corey. Sam cut the camera and went down the forked path. Right down the road was a cottage for visitors.

“Hey Y/N,” Colby came jogging up to the colleen, “Did you see any weird stuff yet?” He shoved his hands in his pockets, a symptom of his bashfulness, he began to rethink his uncolorful wording in his sentence. He just had the sudden urge to go up to her and she wasn’t complaining one bit.

She looked over at him, “No, not yet. I just got really put-off by that lady. She just was so…” Her eyes connected with his and a glistening highlight overcame the peaking iris. The words weren’t verbally there, but he understood what was there.

Sam cut her off, “Dude. Look how big this place is.” It was rationally smaller than their house back in LA, but it was sizable for an ancient brick living space.

Jake made the most commotion out of the seven, “Whoever is first picks where they sleep!” He dashed ahead of the group and everyone picked up speed, almost dropping the rock he just adopted.

“I think there’s only like three beds.” Sam panted. No one paid much mind to him and kept running. They all toppled into the door and Corey unlocked it, which left the rest to run up to a room. Jake took the first one to the left, Sam tumbled into the one across. A room had a small couch for Corey and last, but not least…

“Looks like we’re bunking L/N.”

“Fuck you Brock.”

Sam peaked his head in, “Guys, we have film some shots of the place. Come on.” The three made it to the living room where all and sundry were. Sam grabbed his camera and got everyone in shot.

“What?!” With grand motions each person stood up in their acts of shock. Even though it had been there for a solid five minutes the audience always has to be entertained.

Colby turned around, “Yo! We got a TV too!” A small Toshiba was put on a step stool. It would probably gain no use tonight anyways. It looked like a piece of crap too, thank god for Youtube.

They all got up from their seats and went to uncover the rest of the place, “This is nice, very cool.” Colby led them into Corey’s room. A huge bed frame was around a pink canopy bed. Old photos and paintings of the fortress were hung evenly around the perimeter. Sam went through the rest of the rooms and told everyone to head off and get ready.

The guys took cold showers and Y/N soaked in a muddled bath in the basement. She didn’t like it here. Her mind couldn’t unravel much. Sam was stationed upstairs doing a camera touch up with Jake by his side talking about the new Harry Styles album. A half an hour later everyone was wearing at least one faction of Sam and Colby merch, phones were charged and beams from flashlights slid across the floor like a jumping snake.

The group divided into pairs as they walked to the castle. The sky grew much darker than expected and it felt like a looming spirit chipped away at the warm function of friends. The camera was whipped right back out.

“Alright, we are all showered, changed, and ready to explore the castle before sunset.” All went under the arch while the audio was whacked around by the wind.

Colby turned from his conversation to the viewers, "I’m still like flipping out that we’re staying here tonight. That’s crazy!” His lantern swung below him and the towering castle was engulfed by the purple skies. “Look at this place! Look at that beautiful sunset!” He yelled.

Y/N raised her eyebrows, “Since when were you PG-13?”

He blandly stared at her,”Shut up I need to make money,” He looked back at the camera, “When I was like blow-drying my hair and stuff after my shower, my hair dryer was insanely powerful. There’s obviously a lot of energy in it, like the voltage.”

“I thought he said blow-j-.” Corey chimed in. He shut himself up so they wouldn’t get demonetized, it would be a funny way to go down though. Y/N and Colby giggled along with him. It wasn’t a rare occasion that they all were out laughing and joking, just the side chick with the haunted castle.

Corey swung his flashlight up and down, “His blow dryer started smoking and like almost blew up.”

“So, what I’m saying is the spirits could use all of this energy to talk to us.”

They all made it to the castle and it was around five-thirty. There wasn’t much to do at this time, but she was always watching. There was something about to happen they could all feel it and that thing, it wasn’t going to be good.

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

Part 2? Send me an ask if you want it!!

#Sam and Colby #colby brock x reader #colby brock imagine #colby brock x you #colby brock #xplr #sam and colby fan fiction #sam and colby fan fic #jake webber x reader #jake webber imagine #fanfiction #fanfic #queen mary #corey scherer x reader #fandom

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mrs-dynamight · 4 years ago

Text

Be Nice To Me 5

Part 4.

*************************************************

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x fem!Reader, Denki Kaminari x fem!Reader

Warnings: Eventual mature content, angst, hurt/comfort, love triangle, the reader is lowkey toxic, everything will be adressed in every episode (:

Chapter warning: Swearing, steamy make out session (borderline porn but not really), mentions of other couples form 1A

Chapter: 5/?

Synopsis: You're in love with your best friend Bakugou, and you're cofessing to him but things get a lot more complicated when Denki starts to treat you different *wink wink*

Word count: 3.9k

Author's note: This is sooo long, but I loved writing it, I deeply suggest you listen to the song of the title (here). I'm honestly living my coming-of-age indie kid fantasy with this chapter, as always any suggestion is welcomed.

Chapter 5 First Day of my Life- Bright Eyes

Thank to every single Deity that my weekend was packed with internship work so I didn’t have a minute to think about the emotions bubbling up in my heart and my mind, I came to my room exhausted and directly to sleep.

I didn’t talk to any of my friends that weekend, I had a couple of texts from the groupchats, in one of them there were unresolved questions about my date with Katsuki, and on the other one were the flashes for the Fridays gig and good luck wishes to Bakugo who was going to leave the morning after the show, so they planned a goodbye party in the dorms after the gig, Aizawa surprisingly agreed but under any circumstances we were allowed to having alcohol or any other illicit activity inside the UA facilities, not like that could’ve stopped my favourite trio of dumbasses, Mina, Denki and Sero were already planning on smuggle some liquor to the dorms, that was going to be one epic night.

Monday morning finally came, and as much I would love to just spend the day in my bed sleeping and watching Tiktok I needed education, my muscles were sore of the whole weekend roaming the city with Mirko, who seemed unable to getting tired, but I stilled reunited the forces to get dressed, brush my teeth and tried to look like a decent human being, emphasis in the tried part.

As I climbed down the stairs to the common room for a bite of whatever was in the fridge, I saw a beautiful ash blonde guy drinking his usual morning juice with protein powder.

-Morning Draw, you look like shit-

-Well you look handsome as ever ‘Tsuki, thanks for the kind words of the day, you know how to make a woman start the week in the best way possible- I replied while heading to the kitchen

-But seriously what is that Bunny forcing you to do on weekends? Crack? -

I didn’t reply but instead I just blowed him a kiss and start munching on a toast with excessive amount of jam, Tsuyu and Ochako were eating cereal next to Deku, the three of them saw my whole interaction with Katsuki with those weird eyes that just screamed “marry him already”, I told them I had to talk to them, and they all agreed that lunch time with Tenya and Shoto were the gossip time of choice, I waited for the girls to finish eating and we headed class.

------------------------------------

-YOU TWO FINALLY KISSED?!?- Ochako screamed with excitement

-Is he a good kisser? - Asked Deku pulling out his notebook in the “Kachaan” section

-How’s that relevant to the hero notebook? – I asked Deku

-Wait, isn’t he going to another country on Saturday? –

-Well yes Tenya, that’s the other thing I wanted to talk you guys about-

Then I started to explain the whole predicament of waiting for him and his words about that.

-Wow did he really said that having a girlfriend would be a distraction? - said Tsuyu with a concerned look on her face

I didn’t really thought about that harsh phrase, but it was Bakugo, right? He always says things that hurt other people’s feelings, that’s just him

-He sounded honest, but he shouldn’t have hurt your feelings like that-

-It didn’t hurt my feelings, Shoto, I’m used to him saying things like that all the time-

-That can’t be good Y/N, you can’t just get used to people hurting you, especially if you want to have a relationship, and a long-distance one, where things usually get a little tougher- Said Ochako

-I would consider wait for him to return Y/N, so that way you can both be clear about what you expect for each other- Deku said hiding his face in the Katsudon plate in front of him

I wanted to talk to them about what happened with Denki, but I was afraid they just said that I was overthinking, we’ve always been very close friends; but so were they, why was I so reluctant to talk about me and Denki? Maybe saying it out loud could somehow make it more real.

We finished our lunch and headed to class, the rest of the day went pretty neutral, as well as the rest of the week, but the thought of Bakugo leaving haunted me, he didn’t said or did anything special, we didn’t talked about our kiss or our lovely words, it was like it didn’t happen at all, we came back to being just friends. Denki was purposely avoiding me, I could notice it, anytime I wanted to talk to him he just made up some excuse and leave quickly, the rest of the Bakusquad was busy with the whole party preparations and the Dekusquad was as lovely as always, they told me a million times in that week that they will be there for me no matter what I choose to do; as for me, I was just as confused as Monday morning.

I didn’t wanna go to the party, or the gig, I just wanted to go to my room, listen to sad music, and feel pity for myself until I ceased to exist, but it was definitely off limits, I promised Denki I would go with him to the soundcheck, there was only this last one class, but I wasn’t really in the mood for maths, so I decided the best for me was head back to the dorms and stop thinking so much about everything, missing a class wouldn’t kill me.

When my life crumbles down there is only one thing in the whole world that could make me feel better, and that is loud music, so there I was, headphones to the max, airplane mode on, eyes closed and mouthing every word like a prayer, I felt like every lyric was washing away my worries and doubts, reassuring me that everything was (not) okay, I was so concentrated in my music I didn’t heard the knocking on my door, and didn’t heard a certain blonde calling my name, it was until I felt a big hand in my shoulder that I realized that Bakugo wasn’t in class either, but in my dorm room, with a worried face.

-Fucking dumbass, why aren’t you in class? You’re going to fail math, again-

-I wasn’t feeling like going to class- I said with a bit of guilt, it probably sounded like a lame ass excuse, but at least it was the truth

-Not feeling like going to class? What the fuck do you think this is, a game? Math is your worst subject and if you fail I won’t be here to tutoring you, you can’t fail-

He was worried, I could tell, he just turned every emotion in pure acidic rage, not like knowing this would make his words hurt less, I didn’t want to admit that the thought of being far from him made my heart ache and my eyes water, and it didn’t help the lack of contact of the week, I was looking forward to another one of his tender kisses, or any sign that what happened last Friday was real

-I’m hurt Katsuki, a week ago it seemed like you wanted to be with me, despite everything and this past days you were acting like nothing happened, I don’t know what to think or what to do, I don’t know what's going on with you, how are you feeling, you don’t say anything, you don’t do anything, you just hide your feelings away in your cocoon of rage-

-See, that is exactly why I didn’t want to kiss you in the first place, I knew it would only lead to problems, that’s the reason I didn’t want to tell you I liked you before going away, I knew you would react like this, I told you the truth, I can’t be your Boyfriend, I’m sorry if that hurts your feelings-

And surprisingly I found myself inside his big arms in a tight hug, his face hiding in the crook of my neck, I put my arms around his slim waist and we just stayed there for a solid ten minutes before breaking the contact.

-I don’t want this to hurt you Y/N, I can’t be with you right now, I can’t give you what you need, and as I told you the other night, I don’t want you wasting your time waiting for me-

-I don’t wanna let you go ‘Tsuki- I said with tears in my eyes

-You won’t, think it like this, if this is meant to be, and I know it is, when we see each other again, in a better place, in a better time, it will happen. I don’t know where or when, but I promise you we will be together, but please don’t throw your life away waiting for me-

- That sounded as if we were breaking up-

-We aren’t, this is only the beginning, I promise-

I was being selfish, it was obvious that this was also hurting him, he was being mature and caring, thinking about what was good for the both of us, before the things we wanted, maybe he was right, this was meant to be, just not right now, right person wrong time troupe right, but with a happy ending, right?

That was one of the most bittersweets moments in my life, I was happy to know that Bakugo thought about us as endgame, just like I did, we were still young, we had plenty of time, all the time in the world, I shouldn’t have worried about his feelings, he told me I should never doubt that he liked me, and I was willing to make that compromise.

-Let’s have a good time tonight, ‘Tsuki, for what I know, tomorrow you could be kissing some European woman and forgetting our promise-

-You get jealous that easy, Draw? Already afraid you’d lose me, huh? - He said with a smirk on his face and getting closer to me

I swallowed with nervousness, but I didn’t break the visual contact

-Aren’t you afraid I fall for another guy in the meanwhile? -

-You’ll have to find someone better than me first, and we both know there isn’t such thing, and besides that, you’re not mine, I don’t owe you, I only own the feelings you have for me, and as long as those exist I’ll do everything to be with you. So, that’s a no, I don’t care about any other guy- He said with his lips softly brushing against mines -But right now, I want to be the only thing in your mind- And saying those words he kissed me.

He wasn’t being gentle like the last time we kissed, there was a hunger, a neediness within his kiss, he wasn’t being rough tho, but I could feel the burning intensity in his movements. He pulled apart and looked into my eyes for any sign of discomfort, but when he met my half lidded gaze filled with love, he slammed his lips against mines one more time, his tongue brushed my lips asking for consent to enter my mouth, to which I responded opening it just enough for him to start moving it, massaging it with my own with a rhythmic pace, his hands travelled down to my hips, it seemed like he wasn’t nervous at all, but I on the contrary was almost shaking, we broke the heated kiss with flushy cheeks and sweaty hands, I looked into his eyes and I could see the lust behind his crimson irises. A million questions started bubbling in my mind, does this means he want to have sex with me? Right here and now? He must have noticed the concerned look in my face because his next words were

-Hey, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, sorry if it was too much-

-It wasn’t, it’s just I’ve never, I mean I haven’t… have you? – I asked with an obvious blush on my cheeks

-Just once, it wasn’t bad, but I figured out it could have been better if it was with someone I loved, like you. We don’t have to do anything tho, I just wanted to kiss you-

A strange relief passed my body, he didn’t want me to give myself to him in this exact moment, and I was glad for it, as much as I loved him I felt like this wasn’t the right moment for it, but I still wanted to do other things with him, I mean, this was his last day in the UA, and my first time making out with somebody, we still had a few of hours before the soundcheck. I lead him to my bed and pushed him into it so he could be sitting.

-Y/N are you sure you want to do this? – He wanted to be sure that there was no pressure in doing anything I didn’t want to

-We don’t have to go all the way in, I just want to make sure you feel loved and have fun on your last day, and besides, we already missed math class- And just as this last words escaped my lips I sat in his lap and started kissing his cheekbones softly, his hands went from his sides to my hips as he started to plant open mouth kisses in my neck, sending a shiver down my spine.

-And what about you? You want to feel loved too? – He said against my ear, nibbing at the lobe, I nodded softly, closing my eyes and giving myself in to the feeling of his strong hands in my body, his raspy voice in my ear and the feeling of his lust between my legs.

Our heated make out session made me forgot everything I had in my mind, I was only focused in Bakugo, I couldn’t even began to explain how loved he was making me feel in that moment.

-I have to go packing, but I really like your lips, see my problem here? – He said with a sigh, after a while -I’m actually not in the mood for a party tonight, I would rather having a good night of sleep-

-You’re so boring ‘Tsuki, you sound like an old man with two divorces who is starting to get bald-

-‘Tch, would you rather seeing me drunk and staying up late and doing dumb shit I’ll regret about when I sober up like the rest of those losers? –

-Yes! Only this one time, before you have to go away, let’s get drunk and watch the sunrise, then I could go on with my life in peace-

- Ugh and being hungover in a 7-hour fly? Really, that is your idea of a last night with me? –

I tried to make the best puppy eyes I could as I just said “pretty please” in the most dramatic way possible.

-UGH fine, but don’t you forget that you owe me something for being a fucking loser in Mario Kart-

-Anything for you ‘Tsuki- I said while planting a kiss on his cheek

With a smirk on his face he told me he would tell me what he wanted right before leaving, and I was okay with that, we said goodbye with one last kiss and he went to his dorm room to finish packing. Then I remembered I had my phone on Airplane mode, as I deactivated it I saw a bunch of unread messages, most of them were from my concerned friends asking if I were okay, I answered in the dekusquad groupchat that everything was fine, and immediately they began asking questions about Bakugo and me being both missing math class, I replied a single smiling emoji and they knew we were together. Denki messaged me about ten minutes ago “Hey Y/N I can’t wait for you to come to the soundcheck with me” followed by a cursed image of someone T-posing on top of a drumset, I couldn’t help but laugh, and I replied with an even more cursed image.

-------------------------------------------------------

I was in Denkis car, Katy Perry blasting through the speakers and Denki and I having a carpool karaoke singing Last Friday Night like our life depended on it, it felt like he hasn’t being avoiding me all week, there we were laughing and having a good time. The soundcheck was actually really funny, Jirou who is usually very quiet was obviously the leader, giving orders here and there, I wasn’t completely alone while the band was getting ready to perform, Momo was an official member of the band but she didn’t continue playing with them, but she never missed one of Jirous’ performances, they were obviously very much in love, I couldn’t help to notice the way she looked at Jirou the whole time, and I wondered if that was the same way I looked at Bakugo, I remembered the words that Tsuyu said to me, does everyone knew I was in love with Denki?...

Shit, my mind pictured Denki when my train of though was about Bakugo; it probably were because I was watching Denki plugging his guitar and waving at me at that exact same moment, or did I really thought of Denki when I was thinking about love? A feel of guilt started to build in my heart, just a few hours ago I was making out with Bakugo, and now I was watching Denki going different directions with cables and amplifiers and I couldn’t help but feel like I was in love with him. Momo probably noticed my worried expression because she asked me if everything was right, I just had to lie and tell her that I was okay when in reality I was panicking, I excused myself and went to the bathroom to splash some cold water in my face like the actresses do in every movie to calm themselves down, and apparently it worked, so with more confidence I walked out of the bathroom. When I came back to the table Momo and I were sharing I noticed that people were starting to arrive, I sat next to Momo again and tried to have a casual conversation about school, training, internships and just normal student stuff when I felt a well-known pair of hands covering my eyes.

-Hi Denki- I said as I chucked

-How did you knew it was me? – He genuinely asked

-How couldn’t I? -

-Hey Kaminari, we’re starting in ten- Said Jirou planting a kiss in her girlfriends’ lips

Bakugo arrived just in that exact same moment, I almost forgot he was also going to perform, I didn’t know how to act with other people around us, I wanted to kiss him, but I also didn’t want Denki to see it, I couldn’t help but feel like an awful person for my last thought.

-Hey Draw, long time no see you- Said Bakugo like his tongue wasn’t on my throat a few hours ago

I flipped him off with a smile and blowed him a kiss and continued talking with Denki about who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark, we were currently discussing how long the bear could hold his breath, I turned my head to look at Bakugo and he was already staring at us with the saddest expression I’ve ever seen, and as he noticed my eyes on him he changed it to his usual annoyed one

-You two are the dumbest persons I know- He said, giving us one of his angry looks

-Guys, we’re up- Said Tokoyami grabbing his guitar pick and heading to the stage

-Break a leg guys! - Said Momo giving Jirou one last good luck kiss

Bakugo winked an eye to me and went to the stage without saying anything, my eyes followed his figure to the stage when a sudden voice in my ear made me jump a little bit

-Keep your eyes on me- Whispered Denki in my ear before planting a kiss on my cheek

They started the show, the powerful voice of Jirou quickly caught everyone’s attention, they gotten better over the years, you could tell they were in their prime, usually my eyes were always fixed in the blonde drummer, but tonight they were mesmerized with Denkis fingers skilfully playing with his guitar chords, pearls of sweat in his forehead, a big smile on his face, and golden eyes all over me, he looked perfect.

Suddenly I began to notice everything the boy did, every time his voice intertwined with Jirous’ for a perfect harmony, every movement looked so natural and… sexy? I didn’t noticed I was holding my breath until I heard Shotos’ voice next to me, trying to be heard over the noise coming from stage

-Sorry we’re late, Tenya got lost-

I heard it, but my mind was somewhere else, it was in Denkis’ Kaminari palm. It was almost an hour of absolute bliss, without a single thought crossing my mind just the image of the boy in front of me. I heard the last song of their setlist and prepared for the usual announcement of the end of the show but instead they all waved and came down from stage, all except one, Denkis’ voice was a little shaky when he spoke on the microphone:

-Hi everybody! Thank you so much for coming today, hope you’re doing alright, now we don’t usually do this, but you’ll see, tonight is a very special night, the last one for a while because we’re going to be drummerless tomorrow morning, sooo anyways, I would like to sing a very special song for a very special someone who is here with us tonight, she’s just everything to me, Y/N this is for you-

I felt like I was on fire, the rush of blood went straight to my cheeks, I was suddenly shaking with nervousness, my palms were sweating and I swore everyone could hear my heartbeat, I didn’t wanted to look away from Denki, but I could feel my friends eyes on me. Was this actually happening? The first chords of Denkis’ acoustic guitar confirmed that it wasn’t a dream, his soft voice drowned every other sound, suddenly everything else went dark, it was only the two of us. I paid attention to the words he was saying, he was pouring his heart out, in front of everyone, for me

"Yours was the first face that I saw

I think I was blind before I met you"

This was a love song; Denki was telling me he loved me with every syllable coming out of his mouth and every note from his guitar

"And so I thought I'd let you know

Yeah, these things take forever, I especially am slow

But I realized that I need you

And I wondered if I could come home"

It was perfect, I couldn’t help but tearing up, nobody has ever done something remotely as romantic as this, he sounded so sincere, so drunk with affection, he was obviously nervous, but his eyes were fixed on me

"I'm glad I didn't die before I met you

But now I don't care, I could go anywhere with you

And I'd probably be happy

So if you wanna be with me

With these things there's no telling

We just have to wait and see

But I'd rather be working for a paycheck

Than waiting to win the lottery.

Besides, maybe this time is different

I mean, I really think you like me."

The last strumming of his guitar vanished in the air, and suddenly everything went back to normal, the people around us, the noises, the shocked faces in my friends faces, and the absence of Bakugo.

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Wowowow this was an emotional rollercoster, but what can I say I love drama, thanks to @warrior-princess1 for proof-reading this

Taglist: @mikasalt

#bakugou imagine #bakugou fic #bakugou headcanons #bakugou x fem!reader #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #bakugou x reader #denki imagine #denki x you #denki x y/n #denki angst #denki x reader #denki x female reader #mha x reader #mha fanfiction #mha smut #bnha fanfiction #bnha x y/n #bakugou smut

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bbyboybrock--archived · 4 years ago

Text

You’re Home (Colby Brock Imagine)

Summary: Sequel to To Pluto and Back. After months back home in Bar Harbor, Maine during quarantine, you have had enough of the being away from Colby. You spend the next few driving across the country just to go home to him.

Written: 2020

Word Count: 2,754

Warnings: A lot of fluff, swearing (minor)

Masterlist

“Call me every day while you’re on the road.” My mother says as she squeezes me tight.

“I will, I promise. I should be back in La in five days, a week if I decided to take in the sights while I’m driving. Are you sure you don’t need me to stay? I can cancel everything right now.” I place my hands on either side of my mom’s face.

“I’m positive. Your brother and sister are nearby if your dad and I need help. Besides, I don’t think I can take any more of you moping around the house. Go home to your boyfriend and friends.” My mom kisses my forehead and goes to stand on the porch so my dad and I can talk in private.

“Got everything you need? Your clothes, GPS, snacks, full tank of gas?” My dad asks with his arms crossed over his chest.

“I packed up my bedroom. I have the ice chest in my car, I’m going to get snacks, gas, and ice right now. Mom packed me to lunch and a few snacks. I have all of my chargers, my spare tires, my overnight bags for when I have to spend the night in a motel. My location is on for you, mom, and my friend in LA. My wallet, phone, and all my little necessities are in the front seat along with chargers. I have the number for a tow company just in case. I also have my mace and whistle. I’m going to be okay.”

“I’m just making sure. I’m your dad, I’m allowed to worry. Here, take this.” My dad hands me a folded up bill.

“Dad, I don’t need money. Keep it.” I try to push his hand away, but he’s insistent.

“Just take it to ease an old man’s heart.” I hesitantly take the money and put it in my pocket.

“Fine. I love you guys and I’ll call you when I’m home.” I wrap my arms around my dad and kiss his cheek. He gives me a soft, yet tight hug back and kisses the top of my head. He lets go and my mom joins him as I grab my filming camera off of the top of my trunk and hop into my car.

****

I’ve been down in the dumps since I sent Colby that care package. He sent me one back after and I filmed that video last week. I’ve been moping around the house since then with the new stuffed animal he gave me. I knew that going back home to Maine to help my parents out with the quarantine would be hard, but it’s taking longer than I thought and it’s been taking a serious toll on my mental health. I only came home because my brother and sister are older with their own families, I knew they would help out our parents when they could, but I knew that they needed me to help too. The three hour time difference doesn’t help either. I’m just so used to being with Colby since I moved in with him two years ago. Being away from him truly feels like I’m missing a part of myself. My mom finally saw how sad I was being away and basically kicked me out of the house. After a few days of thinking, I finally packed all of my stuff to head home.

“Hey, guys, Y/N here! Today, I’m taking you guys with me on a road trip. To make a long story short, I’m going home to LA to surprise Colby and finally move into the house. The only one who knows is Sam, who is helping me make sure Colby doesn’t do anything rash like fly over to surprise me. Because of the virus and all, I’m trying my best to limit my human contact. Unfortunately for me, that means taking a 50-hour road trip across the country by myself. But it’ll be worth it in the end. I’m at the gas station to fill up my tank and get some provisions for the next few hours. When I get back I’ll give you guys a little car tour!” I turn off my camera and grab my bag before heading into the convince store.

I only told Sam because I figured he could be the only one to keep Colby in line while I drove. He’s been talking about coming down to Maine to stay with me for a bit, and knowing him he would actually do it. I would have told Jake and Corey, but I feel like they would let it slip that I’m coming. I told Sam that he could tell them when I’m 5 minutes from the house. I’ve worked really hard planning this perfectly so that Colby won’t suspect a thing. I pre-filmed and edited this week’s YouTube video. I made a whole bunch of TikToks all over my parent’s house so I could post a few while I’m on the road and he would think I’m still there. I took a lot of selfies and boomerangs to post Instagram and to send to Colby. I even drafted tweets in case I got too tired to think of something after a long day of driving.

The only issue is when Colby wants to FaceTime; which is every day. I could probably get away with texting and calling him for the next few days. Despite the time difference, we like to fall asleep and wake up together. Well, I’m always asleep and awake first because of the time, but you get the point. We were THAT couple for the past four months.

I get some shots of me getting gas and filling the ice chest with snacks. This is going to be a long trip, but I made sure to only get a few snacks. I did get a lot of iced coffees just in case the gas station I stop at every morning doesn’t have the brand or flavor I like. You only make that mistake once.

“Okay guys, It’s 8:30 in the morning on a Monday, and in all honesty, my goal is to be in LA by Friday. Unless I drive for 5 days straight, that’s not going to happen. I think I’ll barely make it out of Maine today. Realistically, I probably won’t be home until next Monday, maybe even later. I do want you to know that I’m going to try to be safe and smart. All of my travel clothes are light and comfortable. I’m not going to be driving more than 8 hours a day. I’m going to get to the motels around 5 pm so I can get dinner and relax. I’m going to take a break every two hours to stretch my legs, eat, go to the bathroom, etc. I have compression socks to prevent blood clots. I have no real plans for this trip. Honestly, I don’t care how this goes. All I care about is getting home to Colby. I know that I’ve been talking about how depressed and lonely I’ve been without him, but I know that he feels the same way, maybe even worse. So I’m mainly doing this for him. And bub, if you’re watching this, I love you.” I close the camera again and turn on my GoPros to get some shots of my driving.

****

“Did you hear they might extend the quarantine again?” Colby says on the other line. I’m eating breakfast in my car. I spent the night in Denver. I have two more states to drive through before I’m finally in California. The trip is taking a bit longer than I anticipated. It’s Friday and I’m a quarter of the way home. I’ve already driven through ten states, but the fact that I have about three to four more days until I can be in Colby’s arms again is what’s keeping me going.

“I didn’t hear about that. I’ve been trying to spend less time on the internet lately. That sucks. That means we’re not going to be able to see each other until like next year or something.” I can’t help by smile. Sometimes when I lie I have the urge to laugh. I’m generally good at hiding it, but I keep thinking about the look I’m going to see on Colby’s face when I see him.

“Don’t say that. This is the longest we’ve been apart since we started hanging out. It’s already been killing me the past few months. Maybe I could come down to visit you for a few weeks.” He’s been saying that so often, I’m afraid he’s going to sneak out of the house to surprise me in Maine.

“I would love that, babe, but we talked about this. I don’t want to risk you getting sick. I know it’s hard, but we need to wait this out, I promise everything will change soon. Very soon. Oh shoot, I got to get my laundry before my mom gets upset. I’ll call you tonight. I love you.”

“I love you too, princess.” I hang up and just stare at my phone for a bit. A picture of Colby that I took before I left is my lock screen. I didn’t technically lie about the laundry. I brought only a few days worth of clothes and I needed to wash them. So I grabbed breakfast near a laundry mat so I could kill two birds with one stone. I’ve also been texting Sam to keep him updated. We still don’t know how I’m going to surprise Colby. We agreed to talk about it when I’m closer to California so we don’t jinx anything. He’s had to stop Colby from buying a plane ticket a couple of times. I’m so glad that I told him or else this whole trip would have been for nothing.

By the time I get to a motel every night, I get so anxious that I want to start driving again. The only thing keeping me sane is editing parts of the video and stopping at gift shops in every state I drive through to get souvenirs for everyone. I get something specific for Colby and me and then a bunch of cute $1 items for everyone else so they can choose what they want. Our friend group is too big for me to buy bigger things for each of my friends. I’ve already spent close to $300 on gas on this trip so far.

****

“Hey, is anyone near you?” I ask Sam as I pack my stuff back into my overnight bag.

“I’m in my room and everyone is either asleep or getting breakfast, what’s up?” I hear Sam moving in the background.

“I’m definitely going to be in Los Angles today. I have four and a half hours left, give or take, until I’m at the house. Are the plans for today set?” I double-check that I have everything before heading out to my car. I load my stuff into my car and head to the front desk to check out. I pay and return my key before finally heading back to my car.

“Yeah, I mean there isn’t much we can do. Thank God the shops are finally, open. I can distract Colby by going to the mall or something. Jake and Corey are going to be home to let you in and help you get your stuff. I’m going to see where Colby is and tell them right now. Hopefully, they don’t let anything slip.” I hear a door open in the background.

“Yeah, I would definitely kill them myself if they did. Anyway, I have to start driving. I’ll text you when I’m about halfway there and then call you when I get there. Keep me updated on your end please!” I start the car and plug in the address into my GPS app.

“Will do. Drive safe and talk to you later.” Sam hangs up the phone as I readjust everything. I turn on my road trip music and get ready to get breakfast.

Last night when I was talking to Colby, I was texting Sam. We finally settled on how I was going to surprise Colby. Sam is going to get Colby out of the house while Jake and Corey sneak me into the house. They’re going to also help get my stuff out of my car. While Sam and Colby are out, I’m going to get a quick tour of the house and change out of my gross road trip clothes so I can look like a decent human. The three of us are going to hang out downstairs. When they get home we’re going to call them into whatever room we’re hanging out in and boom, surprised boyfriend.

****

Jake and Corey help me set up the last few cameras so I can get Colby’s reaction. They also helped me hide my car. Not that Colby would notice, but I didn’t want to take any chances. They showed me around the house a bit, and honestly, I almost didn’t recognize it from when I was looking at the house with them months ago. Seeing the house in person feels so different than seeing it in videos and FaceTime chats with Colby. Being here makes it real. Sam texted us saying that they were around the corner. That’s when we turned on the camera. I brought lunch for everyone so the three of us are just eating in the kitchen and catching up.

My heart is racing. I don’t even know why I’m so nervous to see my own boyfriend. Maybe it’s because I have no idea how he’ll react. I’ve been kind of giving him the cold shoulder the past few days because I’ve been driving. We haven’t talked as much as we have been for the past four months while I was in Maine. I don’t why, but part of me feels like he’ll be a different person.

“We’re home!” I hear Sam call out from the front of the house. My heart immediately drops to my stomach from nerves. I tightly grip the counter that I’m sitting on to keep myself from falling off.

“We’re in the kitchen. We have lunch for you guys.” Jake responds. I stop breathing for a second.

“I’ll be there in a second. I have to go put my things down.” Colby calls out. I’m so glad that we hid my stuff. I had a feeling Colby would go to his room first. Maybe he’s still the same Colby I left here four months ago.

Sam walks into the kitchen while putting his phone away. He walks over to me and gives me a quick hug. We all wait, whispering, for Colby to join us in the kitchen. The nerves don’t leave my body as he takes longer to come back. Eventually, we hear his footsteps on the stairs.

“Sorry I was… Y/N?” Colby stops dead in his tracks when he sees me. He blinks a few times before a huge grin creeps on his face.

“Hi,” is all I can manage to squeak out. I managed to lose my voice at the sight of Colby.

“Y/N, is that really you? What are you doing here?” Colby starts walking towards me. I hop off the counter and meet his halfway.

“I’m home,” I whisper as I hug Colby, “I missed you so I came home.”

Colby hugs me back for a second before letting go and placing both hands on either side of my face. He looks deep into my eyes and I can’t help but start to cry. I haven’t seen Colby in so long, I can’t believe that I’m standing right in front of him. He kisses my forehead and engulfs me in a hug. I squeeze him tight like he’ll disappear if I let go. I’ve been gone for so long that I forgot what it felt like to hold Colby in my arms.

“I can’t believe you’re here right now. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Colbs. I missed you so fucking much it hurt. I finally feel whole again.” For the first time in months, Colby leans in and kisses me softly. Everything feels right in my world again now that I’m here. Even though I’ve been back in LA for at least 20 minutes, I didn’t feel like I was home until this very second: in Colby’s arms.

#Colby brock #colby brock imagine #colby brock imagines #imagine #imagines #traphouse #traphouse imagine #traphouse imagines #trap house #trap house imagine #trap house imagines #sam and colby #sam and colby imagine #sam and colby imagines #fluff #fluff imagine #fluff imagines #colby x reader #colby brock x reader

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settersloveletters · 4 years ago

Text

— her remora; oikawa tooru

⤷ growing up with a silver spoon in your mouth, you were thought to have everything. that is, until you meet a man that went by the name oikawa tooru

➳ pairing: oikawa tooru x f!reader

➳ additional characters: akaashi keji

➳ genre: fluff

➳ word count: 4.5k

➳ warnings: toxic-ish parents

➳ written by: kiri ♡

— notes; this was inspired by two tiktoks found here & here it was too cute not to write and so i spent abt 5 hours writing this in one go. enjoy!

— more notes; also thank you to @loneveenas and @thelittlebirdthattoldyou for beta reading this!

remora [rem-er-ah]: an obstacle, hindrance or obstruction

Since the moment you were born, you were given everything in life. From your ever-growing trust fund to your luxurious lifestyle that included maids upon maids to always having someone at your beck and call. Yes, you were raised to have everything handed out to you on a silver platter. But the one thing that was never given to you was to choose for yourself. Your whole life, your parents chose everything for you. The staff who watched you grow up more than your parents ever did, the frilly outfits that they deemed ‘feminine and graceful’, — but in your eyes were atrocious and did not suit you one bit — even the ��friends’ you had growing up. All looked at carefully by your parents who wanted to raise the perfect daughter to showcase to the world.

Not once did you ever get to have a voice for yourself. You were seen as the object of perfection, and that meant doing whatever your parents wanted. Being taught that ‘good girls listen to their parents’, you held your tongue whenever you disagreed with something they planned.

“(Y/N), darling, your harp instructor will be there thrice a week and your dance instructor twice a week. Make sure to be on your best behaviour,” your mother cooed, over the phone. “Remember, you were born to be perfect, because—”

“Perfectionism is key, yes mother I understand.” your mother stayed silent on the other line and you knew she was unhappy with something.

“I thought I told you that interrupting is rude and impolite (Y/N). I’ll be adding on more etiquette lessons to your schedule.”

Your shoulders deflated, “I’m sorry mother. I’ll do better.” After another quick reprimanding, your mother hung up, her final sentence being, “Remember the upcoming gala your father is hosting (Y/N). It will be here in 2 months time, so please be sure you perfect your lessons by then.” Resisting the urge to slam the phone back onto its stand, you clenched your hands into tight fists.

You were trapped in a birdcage, with no way to escape. Or so you thought.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Taking a deep breath of air, you hopped out of the carriage and onto the fresh pavement. After telling a white lie to one of the new maids — that your mother told you to go fit some dresses she had made for you — you found yourself at your city square. You brought your hand up to lift your hood onto your head. Although you rarely went out — another rule set by your parents; you have no reason to socialize with the common folk — you were still well-known because of your parents. The wealthy men and women that frolicked in the square would definitely tell your parents if they had seen you out here. The moment you relaxed your shoulders, they tensed up once again at the presence of someone behind you. You looked over to see the same maid you had tricked into leaving the estate. You blew a puff of air, ‘No matter where I go, mother and father are always with me.’

As long as this maid was with you, you wouldn’t be able to relax. Just this once, you wanted to be off on your own, without anyone, especially your parents, reminding you of who you were. “I need to go visit my harp instructor to ask a question. In the meantime, could you go to the boutique and check on the dresses.”

The maid looked skeptical, “But Miss, I was told to always stay with you when we ventured outside the estate.” You gave her a tight lipped smile.

“Yes, and I was told by my mother that I had to be home before noon, which leaves us with,” you looked over to the clocktower that stood in the center of town, “barely an hour. What I need to discuss with my instructor will take at least thirty minutes and if we don’t get back in time you may be held responsible.” The young maid’s face went pale and she nodded her head before quickly running off to the boutique that certainly had no order of dresses your mother had ‘wanted’.

Keeping your head low, you strolled around the town, making sure to stay far from where the carriage stopped. Without having the eyes of someone following you, you were able to loosen your shoulders and actually breathe for once. Something you haven’t been able to do since, well, ever. Hearing the laughter of children, you lifted your head up to see a small fenced-in house a few feet away from where you stood. In the field of the house, you could see small children running around a male that looked to be your age. The young man was tossing some sort of ball up in the air for the kids. But one of the boys hit it a bit too hard, and the ball went flying past the fence, bouncing on the ground until it started to roll towards your feet. Picking up the object, you could hear the quick footsteps of someone coming towards you.

“Sorry about that,” a soothing voice rang in your ears. You glanced up to see the young man that had been playing around with the kids standing on the other side of the fence. You raise the ball up to him, without saying a word. “Thank you, are you new in town?”

“I’m sorry?”

The brunet male hopped over the fence, “This is a pretty small town, so everyone knows about everyone who lives here.” He starts to toss the ball in the air, hitting it with his fingertips. “I ought to remember your pretty face around here.”

Blushing slightly from the compliment, you reply, “You could say I’m visiting.” It wasn’t a total lie. You were in fact visiting the town square. The male hummed as a response, continuing to toss the ball up in the air. You narrowed your eyes, “You know, it’s rude not to look at someone when you’re having a conversation.”

The young man looked at you, the ball falling on top of his head due to the lack of movement from his arms and hands, “Ow. Sorry about that, Princess.”

Your brows furrowed at the name. “I am not a princess.”

“I don’t know, the princesses I know of are always wearing a hooded cape, have a maid running after them and ride in carriages.” he smirked at you.

Fiddling with said hooded cape, you tilted your head and looked at the man in front of you. “How are you so sure that I have a maid and ride in a carriage?”

He chuckled in response. “Not sure. Maybe it’s something about that panicked maid who just came out of the carriage behind you.” Pointing in the direction behind you, you turned and spotted the maid that had accompanied you during this outing. ‘Uh oh’ you thought to yourself.

“Miss (Y/N)! I had gone to your harp instructor’s residence, but he told me that you did not pay him a visit!” the maid sputtered out. “Oh, did I say harp instructor? I meant dance instructor.”

Your shoulders tensed up as you walk towards the carriage, the maid frantically walking beside you. “Besides that, shall we head home?” You entered the carriage, taking off the hood once you took a seat. Looking out the window, you could see the brown-haired man standing where you left him, staring at you. When he noticed that you were looking, he gave you a smile and a wave, “Hope to see you soon, Princess!”

You crossed your arms over your chest, puffing out your cheeks slightly. “I am not a princess,” you whispered.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Although you had an odd first meeting, you couldn’t get the boy with the ball out of your head. There had been something about him that sparked curiosity in you. There was an urge to go speak with him again, as if the world wanted you to see him once again. Before you knew it, you were coming up with ideas to get out of the house. Luckily for you, your mother needed you to accompany her to one of the boutiques she handled. Something about fitting some dresses for the gala. “You need to look your very best darling. The night of the gala is very important for you and our family.” Paying no mind to what she said, you got ready to leave the estate once again.

Not even ten minutes into you trying on dresses, your mother got a phone call that needed her to fly out of the country. Again.

“I have to leave, (Y/N). The minute you’re done fitting these dresses you go straight back home.” she didn’t even wait for a reply from you, as she exited the boutique and entered a second carriage that appeared out of nowhere. An hour passed, and you put back on the clothes you arrived with. There were two of the house staff that accompanied you and your mother, and once you snuck past them, your feet brought you back to the small fenced-in house that you stumbled upon a week ago.

Not sure whether to stay past the fence and wait for someone to come out, you decided to walk up to the front porch of the house, knocking on the door lightly. A minute passed and you were about to knock again, when the door creaked open and revealed the same brown hair you couldn’t stop thinking about.

“Princess! To what do we owe the honour?” the male smiled, surprised to see you there.“Again, I am not a princess. However, I did come to visit. May I come in?”

He hesitated, glancing towards the back of the house, before opening the door wider so that you could walk in. “Be our guest,” he bowed, lifting his head at you to stick the tip of his tongue out the corner of his mouth. You chuckled, before recomposing your face.

He walked down the hall towards the kitchen, you following him. Your eyes stayed on the walls of the house. They were covered with picture frames. You glanced over each frame to see a variety of kids and a few adults. You noticed that some kids weren’t in some photos, and some were in a couple. One thing that was made apparent was the small brown-haired, brown-eyed boy that was in every picture. Your eyes trailed off to the picture posted right before you entered the kitchen. Crouched in the middle of the small children was the same male that took over your thoughts.

“Care for some tea?” You looked over to see him holding a small tea pot. Nodding, you walked over and took a seat at the small table. Pouring you a cup, you could smell the sweet aroma that wafted to your nose. It left a calming effect on you. “You know, you never told me your name.”

Lifting your gaze, you saw him sitting across from you, his chin placed on the palm of his hand as he looked at you. “Well it’s definitely not ‘Princess’, so you may as well stop calling me that.” You took a sip of the tea. It tasted different. It didn’t hold the same bland tea that your parents kept in the kitchen. This tea held more love. “Besides, I don’t know your name either.”

The man opened his mouth to respond but was interrupted by a young child’s voice. “Tooru-nii.” The two of you looked up to see a small girl rubbing her eyes, as she held the ears of a stuffed rabbit tightly in her first. The man named ‘Tooru’ stood up and walked over to the young girl, crouching down to reach her eye level.

“Hey, what’s wrong Mika?” he asked, as he held a worried expression on his face. “Bad dream?” Mika nodded her head, a few tears could be seen in her eyes. Tooru lifted her up into his arms and carried her over to the table you were sitting at. He placed her on a chair beside you and walked over to the cupboard. Looking back at Mika, you found her staring at you with wide eyes.

“You’re really pretty,” she complimented. You smiled at the girl’s purity. “Thank you, Mika, I think you’re pretty too. You and your bunny.” She brought up the stuffed bunny to her chest and hugged it tightly.

“Are you Tooru-nii’s girlfriend?”

Your eyes widened at the question, at the same time you heard the sound of a pot being dropped and shifted your gaze over to Tooru. He turned around and smiled sheepishly before going back to what he was doing. You looked back at Mika before you shook your head. “No, I’m not his girlfriend.” Mika smiled back at you. “Oh good. You’re too pretty to be his girlfriend!”

You brought a fist up to your mouth to refrain from laughing. “Hey! I’m pretty too, Mika.” You see Tooru walk back to the table holding a cup of something and placing it in front of Mika.

Mika scrunched her nose at the brunette, “You can’t be pretty! You’re a boy!”

Taking a sip of her drink, Tooru frowned at her. “I think boys can be pretty too Mika,” he huffed out. “Right...” his sentence trailed off and you looked over to see him looking at you. You stared back at him before you gave in.

“(Y/N).” You finished his sentence and turned to Mika. “And I think boys can be pretty too.” Mika shrugged her shoulders and finished her drink before getting up from her chair and running out the kitchen and up the stairs.

“So the Princess has a name,” Tooru said, in a teasing tone. You glared at him.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Ever since that second encounter with Oikawa Tooru, you found yourself rebelling against your parents more often just to visit the male. Befriending one of the maids, she had told you of a secret underground tunnel that led to the outskirts of town square. You used this information to sneak out at night, when all the staff was asleep, to go meet Tooru.

“Back again, Princess?” Tooru teased, when he saw you walking up the path. You rolled your eyes, but showed off one of your award-winning smiles, “How many times have I told you? I’m not a ‘Princess’.” You looped your arm through his and the two of you strolled through a small forest.

“Well, even though you’re not a real Princess,” Tooru stopped walking, crouching down to pick up a daisy off the side of the path. Turning back to you he offered you the single flower. “You’ll still be a Princess in my eyes.” You accepted the gift, a soft blush dusting your cheeks.

Before it was a weekly thing between the two of you, but two months passed and the two of you were meeting almost every night. Tooru had become your escape from the harsh rules under your parents’ house. With him, you were able to just be yourself and not the perfect little girl your parents raised you to be. The two of you were able to talk about anything and everything. He learned of your uptight lifestyle growing up, and you learned of his hardship growing up.

“Dance lessons?” the brunet asked. “I thought you said you didn’t have dance lessons Tuesdays.”

You took a seat on the grass that sat next to a quiet river. Tooru had brought you to a meadow, not far from town square. “That’s before I took a misstep while showing my parents my ‘improvement,’” you sigh, hugging your legs to your chest and placing your chin on your knees. “Now they added two more days on top of my hard and etiquette lessons.”

You let out a sound of frustration. Being met with silence, you look up to see Tooru offering a hand down to you. You looked at him with confusion. “I’m sure you’re an amazing dancer.”

Smiling, you took his hand and stood up. “I didn’t know you danced.” Leading you towards the middle of the field, Tooru positioned himself to dance the ‘Waltz’. “I may have a few moves up my sleeves.”

The two of you chuckled, before Tooru started to lead you. A few moves was an understatement. Tooru seemed like he had been dancing all his life with how easy you could follow him. You and Tooru danced alone, for what seemed like forever under the light of the moon. When the two of you came to a stop, you were out of breath, but a smile sat on your face.

“That was the most fun I had dancing since I started learning,” you said. The two of you started to walk back to town, for it was about time that you started walking back to your estate. “I didn’t even make a mistake!”

Tooru kept a hand behind you, on the small of your back as you walked. “Maybe you just needed the right dance partner.”

One of the biggest things you learned about Tooru was that he was an orphan. The house that you stumbled upon two months ago turned out to be the town’s orphanage. It made sense once you looked back at it. The picture frames that held different children in each photo. All but one child, Oikawa Tooru. He had revealed that he was abandoned as a baby, left on the steps of the house for the owners to find. Once he became a legal adult, he was able to move out of the orphanage and get a job in town. But his attachment to his old home stayed within him, and he visited the orphanage often to play and watch the young children.

When he first revealed to you the truth about him, you didn’t know what to say. “I’m so sorry Tooru. You didn't have anyone growing up?” you asked. The male smiled softly at you, “No, I had all the kids and the adults growing up here.” he sat up, on the grass. “They became my family.”

You placed a hand on top of his hand, “I’m glad you were able to find your family with them.” Tooru shifted his gaze to you, “I'm glad to have the orphanage too. Without being there that day, I wouldn’t have met you.”

You stared into Tooru’s warm brown eyes. Although his story was sad, you found no trace of that emotion in them. Instead, they stared back at you filled with an emotion you never felt before meeting him. That emotion was love.

It was then that you found yourself falling for the man. He gave you the one feeling that your own parents never once showed you. He looked out for you, when your parents didn’t — only doing so when it benefited them.

“Hey there Princess.” you smile when you see Tooru waiting for you at the end of the tunnel. “Anyone catch you?”

You shook your head, “I’m here aren’t I?”

“How was your day?” Tooru asked, as the two of you walked under the starry night. You let out a sigh.

“My parents came home today.”

“Oh yeah? How was it?”

You shrugged your shoulders — something your mother hated — “The usual. They wanted me to show them my improvement of dance and the harp.”

Tooru looked down at you, “And?”

“And what? They said I was nowhere near ready for this stupid gala,” you said. “Even though I’ve been taking these lessons for who knows how many years. I’m never perfect enough for them.”

You stopped walking and hung your head down low, feeling your eyes well with tears. “I work so hard to please them, but nothing I do is right!” You placed your head in your hands as you started to sob. “I just want someone to be proud of me.”

You could hear Tooru shuffle around, before you felt his warm arms wrap around you. Snaking your arms around his waist, you hugged tighter, as if the moment you let go, you’d be left alone again.

“I’m proud of you, (Y/N).” He caressed your head. “The fact that you’re still standing through all of this has me in awe you know?”

He pulled away slightly and stared straight into your eyes, “Your parents may pick at these little things, but everything about you from your fidgety fingers to your wrinkling nose when you laugh is perfect in my eyes. So please,” he rubbed a tear away from your eyes, “don’t cry over this.”

You pushed your head into your chest, and just stayed like that. His familiar scent comforted you in the dark of night.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“I-I beg your pardon?” All you could hear was a ringing sound in your ear.

“(Y/N), what did we say about stuttering?” Your father looked up at you from his desk, your mother standing beside him with her hand perched on his shoulder. They looked like the perfect couple, if not for the fact that they were only together for money. “Nevermind that, your engagement to Akaashi Keiji will be announced at the gala in three days.”

“Father, if I may ask,” you waited for your father’s signal to continue, “why am I only hearing of this engagement now? Don’t you think it’s too soon?”

Your father sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “(Y/N), do not question this. This marriage will be good for you and the family.”

“But, I don’t even know him.” Your brows furrowed. “I don’t love him, how can I marry someone I don’t love?”

Your parents stared at you. “Darling, love doesn’t make a family successful. Do you think your father and I married for love? Our parents arranged us together because it would lead to a successful partnership.”

“Your mother is correct. Look at our family now, do you think you’d be living like this without a care in the world if we hadn’t married?”

You started to blink frantically, the information coming at you too soon, “B-But—”

“(Y/N),” your father said, in a serious tone. “Do you think we don’t know about your late night rendezvous with that commoner?” You freeze at what your father said. “W-What?”

“Don’t act foolish, (Y/N). We know how you sneak out at night.” your father didn’t spare you a glance. “From this point on, you are forbidden from going out of the house unless I or your mother are with you. Members of staff will be standing at your bedroom door to make sure you don’t try to sneak out again.”

“Father. that’s—”

“No, (Y/N).” You froze, the eyes of your father staring you down. “As long as you’re my daughter you follow my rules. Do you understand?”

You didn’t reply.

“(Y/N), do you understand?” your father asked once again.You bit your lip to suppress your frustration.

“Yes father.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Three days had come and gone, and you spent those three days stuck in your room — given the last few dance lessons you had. Just as your father said, there was always a staff member standing guard at your door. You couldn’t even tell Tooru what had happened. Instead, you were left to think how he was alone waiting for you at the end of the tunnel.

The night of the gala your parents kept working for arrived, and you dreaded each second of it. In your dressing room, of the venue of the gala, you slipped into a soft blue gown that complimented your skin tone. The maids that were helping you did your hair and makeup. You needed to look your best. You needed to be perfect.

“Smile, Miss (Y/N),” the maid that you befriended said as she placed a necklace on you, “it’ll be a happy night. Trust me.”

Once finished, you walked down the halls of the enormous building. The minute you were introduced to the guests, you spotted your parents waving you over to another couple, and a young man that looked almost as bored as you were.

“Here she is, our perfect little girl,” your father smiled. “(Y/N), introduce yourself to the Akaashi family.”

“Good evening, my name is (L/N) (Y/N).”

Your mother pursed her lips at your incomplete introduction. “Why don’t we leave these two to chat?” Your mother smiled, as her, your father and the Akaashi family walked off.

You stayed standing with Akaashi Keiji, looking around the room at the other guests. “So, we’re getting engaged,” you said.

“Mhm.” Keiji took a sip of the champagne he was holding. “Did you have a say in it?”

You laughed, “Of course not, did you?” Keiji shook his head. “What amazing parents right?”

“The best.” The two of you laughed, and you felt a little at ease. The two of you made small talk. The easiest topic to talk about was how overbearing your parents were.

“They fired her?” you gasped. Keiji had been telling you the story of him and his lover. He had fallen in love with their family’s seamstress, and after getting caught, his parents fired her and sent her away immediately.

“Yeah, I tried to go after her, but she disappeared without a trace.” he smiled sadly. “What about you? You mentioned a commoner that you had met?”

Before you could reply, both your parents stood up on the stage at the front of the room, gathering everyone’s attention. It looked like they were just about to announce the engagement. However, the moment right before they revealed the news, the doors to the room were bust open, causing everyone to turn their heads. As if fate was telling you to turn your head, you looked to see Tooru standing in the doorway, wearing a suit that matched your dress and breathing heavily.

“Tooru?” you whispered. You started to walk forward.

“(Y/N)!” you heard your father shout, causing you to turn your head back to the stage. You could see the anger on his face. ‘No,’ you thought to yourself. ‘I’m not letting them dictate my life anymore.’

You turned towards Keiji. “I’m so sorry,” you said to him. He shook his head at you. “Don’t be; go get your happily ever after.” You gave Keji — your new friend — a smile that said ‘thank you’ before you lifted up your gown and rushed over to the man who had your heart.

“(Y/N)!” your mother shrieked out. But you didn’t care at this point. This was your chance to finally escape your parents’ wishes,and to finally do something you choose to do.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, taking Tooru’s head once you reached him.

“I came to rescue you, Princess.” he winked. You laughed and the two of you ran down the hall. Stopping briefly to take off the heels that were aching your feet, Tooru held them in the hand that wasn’t in yours. You could hear your mother and father shouting at you, but you didn’t care.

Oikawa Tooru was giving you a way out. No, he was your way out.

#haikyuucreations #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu oneshots #haikyuu x reader oneshots #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa tooru oneshot #oikawa tooru x reader oneshot #fluff #admin kiri

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hacker-of-fandom · 4 years ago

Text

Obey me characters reactions to a chaotic ratman human.

Sidenote I was high on tired and chaotic rat TikTok enjoy.

Lucifer:

What the fuck is that thing.

This thing was supposed to go to school with demons and angels.

Thought he summoned the wrong person until Mc responded to the name that he called.

A more chaotic Mammon but he does shit for no reason. LIKE AT ALL.

The first time he saw Mc petting a rat inside the house, he felt himself cracking.

"Mc.... What are you holding?"

"My new friend."

"Is your friend... A rat?"

"Why yes he is, most rats don't like being called a mouse or rodents. So he thanks you for that."

"Would you like to pet him? Oh, you've gotten quite pale."

Might have begged Diavolo to change the human students with someone else. As you can tell that didn't go well.

But-

Mc did have some good flaws.

He has good advice for the stupidest things ever, that just so happens to help in the most interesting times.

Like when the sink starts to flood the kitchen, just to grab Mc and give him a wrench and leave him in there.

"Don't let anyone come in here until I've texted you so, okay?"

Gets a text like a minute after that saying that everything is back to normal.

He runs in there not believing that shit.

No doubt the sink is fixed and there is no more water on the floor. And it seems like-

Mc is cooking dinner???

Lucifer is baffled how that even worked.

Another thing is, while Mc doesn't look like he could even be a suitable tea guest with his messy knotted hair, black ripped clothes, and usually a rode- rat on his shoulders. He likes tea.

Very much so.

"No, no Lucifer. I'm not saying the Earl Grey tea that you brought isn't good, it's just that I can tell that you boiled the tea leaves for way too long. A minute longer than needed if anything- Lucifer. Please don't raise your voice, Charlie doesn't like it."

He will never admit that a ratman was actually right about how long you needed to boil Early Grey tea leaves.

His nickname from Mc is, "Prideful boi" or "Lucyyyyyy~"

When he realized he couldn't get Mc to stop calling him Lucy, he just stopped getting mad over it. He now seems to almost smile at it.

Almost.

Mammon:

He has to watch over this human?

Oh hell no.

Is what he thought when Mc first came to Devildom. But now?

Mc is his escape buddy.

You know how Mammon gets tied up from the ceiling like every week?

Mammon just needs to call out for Mc and he'll come with a smirk on his face.

"What'cha do this time, greedy boi?"

Mammon can't even lie to him.

"I tried selling one of Lucifer's rings."

"Oooooh, yeah that'd getcha stuck. So whatcha goin do for my comrades and I?"

"I'll tell the local crows to stop hunting you guys?"

... The rats basically cheer at that.

"You have yourself a deal."

In the next ten seconds, a small army of rats have bitten the rope apart to have Mammon fall into Mc's arms.

Even with Mc scruffy look, Mammon can't really deny that Mc's smirk is very nice looking.

In class, they pass notes to each other with the rats.

Might have matching necklaces to show both crows and rats that they are equal.

Crow king and Rat king.

Bonus points if they now have networks of crow and rats stealing people's stuff.

"Crow bro", "Mamoney", and, "Cutie".

"Don't pet me when saying that! NO I'M NOT BLUSHING, STOP PETTING ME!"

Leviathan:

Didn't really care.

Just another normie.

Until.

"WHERE IS MY SERIES OF "Rat God and snake hybrid fall in love after meeting each other in the woods!" ROMANCE MANGA!"

He was so sure it was Mammon. He was about to storm up towards his seat in the dining room but-

"Oh, wait- oh man I'm sorry dude. That was totally me." Deadly silent.

Rat man knew how to read?

"What."

Mc explains that he was bored one day and asked if the rats could find him a manga to read. He just never got where they got it from.

Apologies for the inconvenience and hands him the manga that he was currently reading.

Was in such a state of shock that he didn't even comprehend that rats somehow got into his room and got the books of the top shelf.

"Y-you read manga?"

"Yeah, I watch anime and play video games too in my free time."

"Oh- w-well! I bet you don't even play Heros alley!"

"I've played both demos, the first game, and the dev even emailed me a few days ago, about letting me play the second upcoming Hero Alleys 2 game before the release to see my opinion."

He can't believe it.

"You know Kero-sama?"

"He's an old high school friend, yeah."

Begins to worship this rat-man.

Probably hugs Mc crying.

Spends so much time texting each other about games they've played and animes. That Leviathan realizes Kero is not the only game creator Mc knows.

Mc knows a lot of famous people in the Otaku world.

Leviathan sometimes leaves out open bags of chips for the rats that come by his room when Mc is gone.

Might accidentally confess his love towards Mc to the rats.

Mc explains the next day that he can understand what the rats say to him. And that he thinks Leviathan is pretty cool to be around as well.

Leviathan might die.

"Gamer bro.", "Envy boi", and "Levi-Kun".

"Don't call me that!" Five minutes later... "Can you call me Levi-Kun again, please?"

Satan:

Hates rats.

With his cat love, he wouldn't bat an eye at a rat dying.

But when he finds rats in the library in huge group pushing specific books of shelves with Mc sitting on a couch reading the books to them, and them sitting in crowds just watching and listen to his voice. He might think twice before kicking them.

Other than Mc's messy looks and chaotic personality, his voice was often very nice to listen to. So when he saw this reading group of rats, he slowly walked towards Mc before sitting down on one of the empty seats. As all of the other seats were taken with rodents.

It was ironically the Nutcracker, that Mc was reading out loud. At it seemed like he just started on the book. When the nutcracker and Ratking were fighting, Satan summed that the rats would hate the nutcracker.

But to his surprise, the rats cheered or jumped around when the Rat King was defeated. And Mc laughed at their antics.

Mc ended the book with a happily, "The end!".

"Sorry, Satan. You were probably looking for something."

Satan snapped out of his daydream and realized, yes he was looking for a book before coming here.

"Oh no it's fine, this was actually quite entertaining. May I ask some questions?"

"Shoot."

This ended up in a beautiful friendship of two chaotic people who love torturing Lucifer and reading books.

And yes, Satan does try to protect some rats from cats now.

"Kitty cat", "Angry boi", "Bookworm" and "Mine" are all nicknames that has made Satan stop reading or keeping a straight face.

Satan was reading a book while Mc was holding him against his chest, reading over his shoulder and just gripped tighter on Satan and said,

"Mine." Satan didn't know who he was telling that to but he was pretty sure his heart just picked up it's speed and lost his place in the book.

His voice is very nice, okay?

Asmodeus:

GrossgrossgrossgrossgrossGrossgrossgrossgrossgrossGrossgrossgrossgrossgrossGrossgrossgrossgrossgross

Did he mention gross?

Mc needed to take a shower! Do his hair! Clean up! Wear some good clothes!

AND FOR DIAVOLO'S SAKE GET RID OF THE RATS.

Asmodeus avoided Mc like the plague. I mean- rats have been involved with many plagues so it's no surprise.

But one day-

"Hey! Asmodeus! I think you lost this!"

Asmodeus turned around to see his lost necklace. It was pink pearls with a gold diamond chain.

He completely forgot that Mc was dirty and hugged Mc as hard as he could.

"How did you find it? Oh, I've missed it so much!"

"Let's say I've had a little help. Plus I actually wanted to know if you've lost anything else?"

Short answer yes, yes he did.

So Asmodeus was in Mc's room which wasn't actually that bad looking. There weren't that many rats as he expected. While Mc was grabbing all the jewelry the rats have found in a month time.

Is honestly surprised that Mc didn't sell any of the items. A lot of it would have made him one of the richest humans in all three dimensions.

Asmodeus asked how he can repay him, with Ya know. Sex.

Mc shakes his head no but instead asks him what hair products he uses?

Asmodeus thinks he is about to get a new makeup friend when in reality Mc wants to clean some of his rat friends.

But it just ends up Mc and Asmodeus going to a spa, that is at human temperatures.

Even if Mc looks like a rat, he is kinda good looking without a shirt and his hair covering 95 percent of his eyes.

"Pretty boi", "Jewels", and "Pinky-pie" are nicknames he has used for Asmodeus.

Personally likes all of the nicknames.

Beelzebub:

Ratman eats.

A lot.

It's not just him that he's feeding, it's his army of rats.

So when Mc first eats with the demon brothers he eats a shit load for himself and then pulls out a basket to put cheese, bread, crackers, and a few veggies inside for his army.

Then walks into his room and just whistles.

The army comes flooding in his room to eat the food he has provided.

He leaves the room to go to the kitchen where he finds Beelzebub going through the fridge even though dinner was just served twenty minutes ago.

They actually begin to talk.

Beelzebub enjoys knowing that he has a eating partner(s).

They get onto the topic working out, school, food and eventually family.

Mc explains he doesn't have much of a family except for his rat family.

Beelzebub doesn't try to bring up Belphegor but Mc says this:

"I've actually read about the seven sins avatar once. And I'm just wondering, where's sloth? I can't remember his name but I know it starts with a 'b'." Mc turns to the rat on his shoulder.

"Belphegor? Oh yeah, that's it! Belphegor the avatar sin of sloth! Where is he?"

Beelzebub might just cry right then and there.

"I don't know." Mc's eyes soften at his answer.

Mc and Beelzebub talk about what happened. And become very close friends in the matter of days.

Beelzebub is glad to have someone to talk to about his guilt and the fight between Belphegor and Lucifer but-

There is one thing that he just doesn't- understand.

Mc fights for him. And he didn't understand it. Beelzebub once caught Mc fighting a demon in the hallway of the school. And he punched the demon square in the face.

He later figured out that the demon was talking trash about him and Mc overheard it and just attacked the student. Like a vicious animal.

After the fight, Mc is left a bleed nose and a smirk. Beelzebub is very scared and worried. But is calmed down once Mc hugs him.

"I'm not letting anyone talk trash about my family."

Is super happy for the rest if the week.

"Hungry boi", " Favorite cheese.", "Cutie pie".

Cutie pie kinda makes him freeze or drop whatever he has from shock. He likes it though.

Belphegor:

After the whole timeline killing thing, the rats don't trust Belphegor at all. They'll hiss and bit and poop in Belphegor's bed. And let me tell you when you have an army of rats pooping in someone's bed its like cow shit.

Mc probably forgives him completely but Belphegor is getting a different vibe with the rats.

Finally, speak up about it.

"Hey, Mc."

"Yesss?"

"Do you still hate me?"

"What."

Now Belphegor feels like a dumb ass for asking this.

"Do you still hate me because your rat friend-army is like attacking me? And it's making me feel terrible for Ya know, the..." Belphegor kinda just moves his hands around.

Mc sighs and whistles sharply. Belphegor flinches seeing the thousands of rats running in the room with most of their eyes on him.

"Alright! Who has been harassing Belphegor!? I told you guys not to hurt him. He's my friend. We just set on the wrong foot guys. Apologies now."

Fuck he didn't mean for Mc to do this. He has gotten afraid of the rats for the past two weeks and he's just waiting for the rats to turn their backs on Mc.

Like he did.

But to his surprise and relief, the rats run away but come back with an item.

It was ring.

They tower up towards Belphegor with the ring grabbing his left hand and placing it on his ring finger. It was a diamond ring.

"What." Mc stuttered realizing what they were doing.

"Guys I'm not forcing him to marry me to make up the whole killing thing, come one."

The rats didn't seem to care as they danced and made a shrill scream of the wedding music.

"So... We're married now?"

"In rat terms, yes."

He's not going to complain if he doesn't get attacked anymore and is expected to cuddled Mc.

Also, the ring looked very nice.

Nicknames are, "Sleepy boi" "Cowboy" and "My husband".

Mc meant it as a joke but realized Belphegor was blushing. So he decided to only say it when they were alone.

Solomon:

Thinks Mc is a wizard of some sort.

A rat wizard.

Solomon constantly tries to make Mc do a blood pact with him.

"Dude can't we just be friends like come on."

Is also okay with that.

They become potion buddies.

The rats help with getting items that humans can't get. Like herbs in the monster forest.

They might have accidentally made a love potion for Asmodeus but used the wrong hair.

It was a long week for Mc since Solomon taste-tested it.

Solomon was constantly trying to hold his hand, or hug him.

The few times Mc laughed at something in class while hold Solomon's hand, Solomon would be overcome with emotions to kiss the dirty rat-man.

One time he succeeded.

*Insert muffled ratman screaming*

After that interesting week, Solomon remembered everything and would scare Mc by hugging him or giving him the same half lid eyes while telling him he loved him.

The only man Mc has ever feared.

Nicknames Mc has given him, "Wizard boi" "Lover boi" and "White owl."

Solomon honestly likes White owl as an alias.

Simeon:

Rats like shiny things.

Simeon is very, very shiny.

Mc is very protective of Simeon.

Case closed.

But he knew the only way to really befriend Simeon was to befriend Luke. But without seeming like he was just trying to befriend him, Ya know?

So, Mc stood up for Luke when he was being teased for his height.

"Mammon you better shut up before I start sending my rats to take your jewelry and sell them."

You can bet that no one bullied Luke for his height again.

"You okay, Luke?" Luke denied that he even needed help but Mc knew that he just got on Luke's and Simeon's good side.

There is just times where Luke, Solomon, and Simeon talking while Mc is just listening when Mc would grab Simeon's hand and play with it.

Solomon would chuckle at the sight of the rat-man just playing with an angel's hand. While Simeon would be slightly confused.

Mc would have the most serious look on his face while he just tenderly touch Simeon's palms.

"Mc, what are you doing?"

"Shiny."

His hand wasn't even shiny but that's his response.

It would become a thing where Mc would friendly touch Simeon's hair or hand or cape.

And animalistic fight for him.

It took Simeon to look up if rats liked shiny thing and if they protect them.

And they do. In fact, they can hoard them and protect them with their life.

It was too late for Simeon. He had a cute dirty ratman king protecting him because he was shiny.

His nicknames would be, "Holy boi" "Lovely" or "Shiny".

Simeon did blush at the nickname lovely.

Luke:

Luke thought Mc was a sinful human based on looks. Dirty, hoarded shiny things, and was friends with the demons.

But he soon just realized that Mc wasn't a bad person, just a rat.

Luke became very interested in Mc's rat friends and secretly giving him sweet after he stood up to the demon brother about his height.

And much like Simeon, Mc found that Luke was very shiny too.

But soon Luke looked up at Mc like a dirty father-like figure. And Mc saw him as a son. Along with the rats.

"Shiny kid." Or "Angel boi" was the first nicknames he used.

Mc would let Luke pet the rats after a while.

Simeon, Mc, and Luke looked like a small family.

Mc would begin to call Luke, "Son" or "Kiddo".

Luke complained but would cheerfully tell Simeon about it.

Barbatos:

He probably fainted seeing Mc with rats on his shoulders.

Would avoid him at all costs.

But he would suddenly get along when Mc stated that there were mice in the palace.

"What?"

"Yeah, my rats just told me that they smell mice in here we can get them out if ya-"

"Please, that would be very appreciated."

In a minute the ten rats that Mc brought were biting the back of at least twenty mice's feet as the ran out of the open castle doors.

Everyone was in awe at how organized the rats were and more of the fact that Barbatos was being held by Mc.

They got along but Barbatos was very cautious around Mc. Until Mc had enough.

"Barbatos I love you, so I'm going to leave my rats outside when I come to the castle, I also will be well washed okay? I want to befriend you." Is the voicemail Barbatos got from an unknown number which he could tell was Mc.

Part two will be the rest of Barbatos and Lord Diavolo. Thank you!!!!

#obey me beel #mammon #barbatos #satan #obey me belphegor #obey me shall we date #obey me diavolo #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me mammon #obey me asmodeus #male reader #rat man

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janeyseymour · 4 years ago

Text

Bound To Obey and Serve

hi again! here we are, with yet another SiX fic! based off of this hc by the fantastic @chimkennumget

can also be found here !

Since being reincarnated, the queens had found their groupings. Of course, all of the queens were close; it was just that some queens were closer to each other than others. Catherine and Catherine were usually together. Anne, Katherine, and Anna typically stuck with one another. Then there was Jane Seymour. She fell somewhere… Jane Seymour fell somewhere in between the two groups, easily being able to fit herself into whatever either group was doing. While this is usually a good thing for someone, Jane couldn’t help but wonder why she wasn’t able to clearly fit herself in either grouping, instead feeling like an outsider to either clique when she was around them.

Since being brought back to life, Jane Seymour has done wonders in self-growth.

No more was she the meek and mild mannered woman that she was in the past. No, now she was quite outspoken and was happy to speak out when she felt necessary. Well, until today at least.

Catherine and Catherine were sitting in the kitchen sipping at their coffees when Jane awoke.

“Good morning ladies. I’m sorry I wasn’t up early enough to make coffee for you two this morning,” She yawned and pulled her robe closer to her body.

“No it’s alright Jane. Cathy and I were just discussing what we were going to do today. I think the two of us are going to head to the museum a few cities over and spend the day there,” Aragon explained. “Of course, you’re more than welcome to join us if you would like,” she added on quickly as an afterthought.

Cathy’s face flitted to a face of almost disappointment before slapping a smile onto her face, but Jane was quick to catch it. “Yeah, if you want to come, you could.”

“Oh, thank you for the offer but uhm,” Jane racked her brain for an excuse. “I think I have to do some things around the house .” Wow Jane, she thought to herself. Lame excuse.

“Okay,” Catherine slightly drew it out. “Well, if you change your mind-”

“Thank you,” Jane offered through a tight-lipped smile. “But I wouldn’t want to impose.”

“Jane, you’re my sister in-law. If you want to, you can,” Cathy spoke, although sounding a bit annoyed. Jane took the hint. The sixth queen clearly wanted time with her godmother- alone.

“I’ll just do my thing around the house. Don’t worry about me. Thank you though.” She poured herself a cup of tea, never really one for coffee, and made her way into the living room. About an hour had passed before she saw off the two Catherines and gave them a small wave goodbye.

“Have fun, loves! Let me know when you get there!”

A few moments later, she heard a loud eruption of giggles coming from the backyard. Curious as to what was going on, she hoisted herself off the couch and made her way outside. What she was met with shouldn’t have surprised her. The chaotic three were filming a Tiktok with about twelve cans of alcoholic beverages involved.

“Oh dear, what have I walked into?” Jane made her appearance known.

“Jane! Jane! Anne and Anna and I are filming that tiktok where you put a drink on the basketball and drop it and try to catch it! You should try it with us!” Katherine exclaimed quickly.

“Yeah Jane, you should join us,” Anne replied sarcastically .

“Oh,” Anna looked over. “Hey Seymour.”

“You guys do know it’s,” she looked down at her watch “-ten in the morning? Maybe a bit too early to be drinking?”

“Oh come on Janey! You’re young! Let loose a little!” Katherine grinned at her.

“Kat, if she doesn’t want to, she doesn’t have to. Let her keep the stick up her butt. Doesn’t mean we can’t have fun,” Anne shrugged, trying to drag Kat away.

Jane had a feeling the only one who would be happy to have her join them this time was Katherine. Anne had streaks of wanting her to join them, exclaiming “come on Jane! You’re one of the youngest queens! Let loose!” and other moments of “Jane’s too uptight for this. We don’t need her to ruin our fun.” Today was definitely a day where Anne did not want to be bothered by the third queen’s presence. Anna mostly just agreed with whatever Katherine said, indifferent to Jane’s presence within the chaos.

“Jane, it doesn’t really matter what you do. You can do whatever you want, and it’ll be cool. But, I think Kat would like it if you stuck around.” Cleves took another swig from one of the cans.

“No, uh, I have to do some things around the house anyway,” she lied through her teeth. “I’ll just be on my way.” She shot Katherine an apologetic smile before turning on her heel and heading back into the house. She missed the smug grin Anne shot her.

Most of the housework had been completed earlier in the week, which left Jane with not much to do except gather the various dishes in the sink and load them into the dishwasher. She looked out the window to see the three queens laughing as Katherine frantically attempted to catch the can. How she longed to join them, but seeing as Anne couldn’t be bothered with her today, she settled for curling up on the couch in the family room with a book.

The blonde got quite lost in her book, and before she knew it, her book was being ripped out of her hands by a very impatient Anne.

“Hey! Give me my book back!” The silver queen went to grab her book.

“Jane, it’s 5:30! Why haven’t you started making dinner yet? I’m starving you know,” the second queen huffed.

When Jane didn’t respond, only attempting to get her book back, Anne held it above her head. “Start dinner!”

“Newsflash Anne! I’m not the only one in this house who is capable of cooking! If you’re so damn hungry, make your own food!” Jane snapped, grabbing Anne’s arm and her book before heading to her room.

“What’s her deal?” Anne mumbled as she made her way into the kitchen.

“I mean, I’ll go check on her I guess,” Katherine muttered and headed in the direction Jane went. She knocked on the door and waited for a response. Jane opened the door slightly, only peeking out. She’d rather not get chewed out by Anne again. When she saw it was Katherine, she opened it a little wider.

“Kat! What can I do for you?”

“I was just checking that you’re okay.”

A switch flipped inside of her. Bound to obey and serve.

“I’m fine love. Don’t worry about me. I better be on my way to apologize to Anne and make dinner.”

“You don’t have to though. You were right in what you said.”

“Well, regardless of what I said, I was quite rude. Any requests for dinner?” Kat shook her head. “Alright well, then let’s go so I can figure it out.”

“Oh look who decided to come back to the kitchen. Gonna make us dinner like you should’ve done an hour ago?” Anne snarled.

“Anne, I came down to apologize for my reaction earlier. I’m sorry, and I’m going to make dinner now.” She silently made her way to the various cookbooks, opened one and set upon finding the ingredients for dinner. Bound to obey and serve.

About an hour later, the other two queens returned to the house, fully expecting dinner to be on the table waiting for them.

“No dinner yet?”

“No.” Anne started, already annoyed by the lack of food in her stomach. “J-”

“Jane just lost track of time. It’s going to be ready in like 5 minutes. Lay off a little Anne,” Kat interrupted before shooting her cousin a glare.

“Yeah, what Kat said,” Anna tagged on.

“Oh alright. We’re gonna head up to my room for a bit then. Let us know when it’s done?” Cathy looked hopeful. Katherine nodded and watched as the other two Catherine’s made their way up the steps. She set out to set the table, like she did most nights, before seeing that someone had already done it.

“Who set the table?” Katherine questioned, clearly confused.

“I did. Just figured it would take it off of you,” Jane mumbled as she took the casserole out of the oven.

“Do you want me to call for the others?”

“If you want,” Jane shrugged. “If not, I can do it too.”

The family found their usual seats, Jane at one head of the table with Katherine and Anne on either side of her, and Catherine of Aragon at the other head with Cathy and Anna next to her. The family set out eating as per usual, and the first and sixth queen rambled on about the things they had seen at the museum. Usually, Jane would offer affirmations that she was listening, but tonight the third queen ate only a few bites before pushing the remaining food around on her plate silently. Keeping her eyes trained on her plate, she set her fork down and began to pick up her plate to take the sink.

“Jane? Isn’t that my job?” Catherine questioned.

“I-” Jane didn’t know what to say. “I just figured you were probably tired from the museum, so I would do it.”

“Does this mean you’ll do my laundry too?” Cathy had sensed something was wrong with the blonde the entire dinner. It wasn’t like Jane to not talk during supper. Cathy was testing her.

“Of course. Just put it outside my door, and I’ll have it done for you by tomorrow.” Bound to obey and serve.

Weeks had passed, and Jane Seymour had only continued to revert back to the meek and mild-mannered woman she once was. Sure, the third queen had her moments of reverting back to times of when they had first been reincarnated, only this time was worse. And this time, the others had taken notice of it. Katherine had noticed Jane spent much more time in the house, always tidying up, even when there was no mess. Both Catherine’s had acknowledged that their fellow queen was never late to begin dinner again, and she often could be found cleaning up after too. Anna hadn’t really gotten in the blonde’s way, but she knew too that Jane was reverting back to her old ways. Anne didn’t seem to mind that Jane was picking up her slack around the house, but that didn’t mean she didn’t notice it. Unless she was tidying up or making dinner, the blonde was in the house, and she was most likely secluded in her room, silent.

While the queens noticed the change in their friend and sister, they also knew that sometimes Jane needed to have these moments before she would realize she was being rather silly and go back to being the more outspoken Jane they had come to know and love. So, they let her be.

One night, long after the show was over and the other queens had left, Jane found herself sitting in the dressing room alone. A knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts; she thought she was the only one still in the building.

“Jane?” The stage manager Marta asked. “What are you still doing here?”

“Oh you know,” she shrugged. “Just thinking.”

“Well, why don’t you go think at home? We’ve all gotta be back here bright and early for the b-roll shoot.”

“I suppose you’re right.” She bit her lip as she realized the queens had only brought one car to the theatre that night, and Catherine had taken the van with the rest of the queens home already. She began to gather her stuff and walk out. “Have a good night,” she tossed over her shoulder.

“If you just wait a sec, we can walk out together? That way, I know you get to the car safely.”

“Oh uhm, there’s no need.” Jane prayed her answer would suffice, but it didn’t.

“Nonsense. Just let me grab my things, and we’ll be off.” Jane weighed her options: she could run out of the theater and into the night, or have the stage manager pity her when they would go out to an empty parking lot and offer her a ride home. Logically, she knew she should just accept the ride that Marta was bound to offer, but her thoughts and worries of being a burden to the other woman outweighed the logic. So, she dropped anything that wasn’t of importance to her and ran into the dark streets. Oh, if only she had thought about the outcome she would be faced with.

The stage manager rounded the corner where she had left the silver queen, only to find all of her belongings aside from her wallet and phone splayed out on the floor.

“Jane?” She tried, but there was no response. The woman was already a few blocks down the street. “Oh for Christ’s sake.” She dropped her belongings, aside from her wallet, phone, and keys, and made her way to the car, dialing a number she almost knew by heart.

“Catherine of Aragon speaking.”

“Lina, it’s just Marta. Jane hasn’t made her way home, has she?”

“No. I thought she was still at the theatre?”

“She was up until a few minutes ago. I told her I would walk her to her car, but when I came back with my things she had already left. Dropped all her things.”

“We only brought one car to the theater. She told me she would figure out getting back home. The poor thing. I’ll gather the others, and we’ll start looking for her.”

“I’m so sorry for roping you guys into this. You must all be tired.”

“Our tiredness doesn’t matter if we don’t have our Janey home safe,” Catherine affirmed before rounding up the rest of the queens.

Meanwhile, Jane had slowed down slightly before stopping in a park. Everything was quiet, and it wasn’t a terribly cold night. She settled down on a bench, pulled her wallet and phone closer to her and laid down. Logically, she knew that sleeping on a bench was silly when she knew she could call Aragon to pick her up, but she didn’t want to be a burden, and she certainly didn’t want the eldest queen’s pitiful looks. She could call any of the other queens too, but the only ones who might bother to come and get her are Katherine, who will inevitably bring a grouchy Anne Boleyn with her and Anna, who really doesn’t know how to interact with Jane unless they’re in group scenarios, and maybe Cathy, who she thinks only acknowledges her because in her past life the two were sister in-laws. The woman had begun to drift to sleep when she heard a frantic call.

“Jane Seymour! What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?” Marta yelled as she ran closer to the woman.

“I-” the woman broke into tears.

“Oh Jane, I didn’t mean to-”

“No, no. It’s my fault. I’m sorry. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine here.”

“You’re speaking nonsense. The other queens are worried you haven’t returned home yet. Come on, I’ll give you a lift.” Marta began to pull the queen to a sitting position, but the blonde was not having it.

“Marta!” She spoke firmly. “I said to just leave me here.”

“Seymour, you know I can’t do that.”

“I don’t want to be a bother to the other queens tonight. I’ll head back in the morning.”

“Is that what this is about?”

“What?”

“Why you’ve been so quiet lately? Don’t think we haven’t noticed,” The stage manager pointed out.

“I just-”

“If you don’t want to go home, then come home with me. I’m not leaving you out here tonight.”

“I-” the blonde weighed her options. She could fight it, or she could just give in. Bound to obey and serve. “Fine.”

The two walked in silence back to the stage manager’s car, the only noise being Marta texting away furiously.

I found her. The poor woman didn’t want to be a burden to you guys. She’s staying with me for the night. -M

Please convince her to come home. -Cath

I could barely convince her not to stay out on the streets tonight. I’ll have her home tomorrow morning. -M

The two made their way into the small apartment, Jane awkwardly standing by the doorway.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I can go.”

“Nonsense. I know we aren’t exceptionally close, but I like to think of you as a friend Jane. Friends don't let other friends sleep in parks when they have a perfectly good home to offer.”

“Uh, okay. I’m sorry.”

“There’s no need to apologize.”

“There is though?” the blonde questioned. She had, in fact, crashed this poor woman’s home because she was too stubborn to voice her need for a ride home.

“Jane, you haven’t been this way since you guys were reincarnated. What’s with the sudden change?” Marta took a seat on her sofa and gestured to the seat next to her. Jane weighed her options. She could refuse the offer and stand, but that would come off as rude, and heaven forbid she be rude to someone who so kindly welcomed her into her home at such short notice. Or, she could sit like she was told. Bound to obey and serve. She sat, not quite sure what to say. She didn’t know what caused her to spiral this time; usually, it was a pinpointed event. Marta only continued to look at her patiently, waiting for her to speak.

The river of tears opened as Jane used her voice for the first time in weeks.

“Catherine only cares about me because I was her lady in waiting, and she pities me. Anne cares about me some days and tells me I’m young and to let loose, and other days she couldn’t be bothered with me. Anna only agrees with whatever Kat says. Is it that she feels she has to like me because those two are so close? Katherine seems to like me only because we’re close in age, even though I tend to act like the mum of the group. And Cathy, does Cathy only talk to me because we were in-laws?” The stage manager’s heart broke at the concerns Jane had just expressed to her. How could the glue of their found family really believe she didn’t belong? She began to speak, but the queen only continued. “Everybody has found their group, and I for the life of me cannot figure out where I’m supposed to be. Maybe I just shouldn’t have ever been brought back. Afterall, all I was just bound to obey and serve. I wasn’t anything special, and I’m not anything special in this life either.”

“Jane I-”

“I’m so sorry. Oh God, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” the blonde sputtered out.

“There’s nothing to apologize for. I’m sorry you feel that way, but I hope you know it isn’t true, any of what you just said.” Was this comforting? She wasn’t used to having to comfort anybody, especially the one who was always comforting everybody else.

Eventually, the silver queen’s river of tears dried for the night, a small frown on her face taking place as she drifted to sleep.

The third queen entered the house rather meekly the next morning, being greeted with pitiful looks from the other queens. After the six queens had talked, one thing was determined.

No more was Jane Seymour bound to obey and serve. She had a voice.

#six the musical #six musical #six fanfiction #six the musical fanfic #six the musical fanfiction #six musical fanfic #six fanfic #jane seymour

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totally-incorrect-theatre-quotes · 5 years ago

Text

Hair (fanfic)

Look at me go, two fanfics in two days. It’s almost like I should be studying or something but would rather write sad fanfiction instead of dealing with organic chemistry.

Anyway, this fanfic is heavily inspired by a text-post from @lesbian-deetz about blonde Lydia and how she ended up with black hair and a tiktok by @vrronicasawyer-cosplay

I took an already sad text post and made it ten times sadder!

Tw: Mourning, death

__________________________________________________________

Everyone always said Lydia had the most beautiful blonde hair. When she was first born everyone was so shocked to see this tiny baby girl with light blonde hair when both her mother and father had dark hair, it wasn’t until they remembered Charles’ red-headed father that it all made sense that Lydia was blonde. From the day she was born, nobody could deny that Lydia was Charles’ daughter. Even as a baby she looked exactly like him from her eye color, the shape of her nose, and her face in general. Emily tried not to be envious, though she did land in a few remarks about how unfair it was that she grew Lydia inside of her for nine months and she looked exactly like her father, who’s job in making the baby ended nine months and fifteen minutes ago. Little did Emily know that even though she looked like Charles, Lydia would undeniably be considered Emily’s little clone.

As a toddler, she had little curls that killed people when she gave a rosy-cheeked and buck-toothed smile. Her mother would love to braid flowers in Lydia’s hair and pretend they were fairies in the garden. Her father used to gush about how he loved the light, almost white colored hair that contrasted Lydia’s dark brown eyes. As she got older Lydia always just kept her hair long. She liked the way that it blew all crazy when she was running on the playground, and the time spent every morning with her mother helping her fix her hair for the day. She begged her mother to let her get bangs when she was around ten years old, and Emily begrudgingly agreed only because she also had bangs as a child and hoped that letting Lydia get them done once would get it out of her system. Lydia ADORED her new hair cut, and even Emily thought the look suited her. Mostly she was just thrilled her daughter was happy and expressing herself.

Lydia never really thought much about having blonde hair, she just thought it was funny when people would joke about how her family must have brought home the wrong baby because her hair was so light compared to hers. Her father kept his brown hair in a professional style like all the other father’s Lydia saw of her classmates, she teased him for being boring. Emily though, she had shorter hair from as early as Lydia could remember. It was dark brown, nearly black hair that Emily kept cut just above her chin in a messy bob. At nights Emily and Lydia would flip through old photo albums and Emily would groan when photos of her with long hair appeared.

“My parents always wanted me to keep it long, said it was ‘proper of a young lady’ ” Emily mocked in a stuffy voice, “As soon as I turned sixteen, I went to the hairdresser and told them to chop it off! My mother was less than thrilled when I came home missing ten inches of hair.”

“Would you be mad if I cut my hair like that?” a ten-year-old Lydia asked

Emily shook her head, “Of course I wouldn’t be. You can do whatever you want with your hair. I just like mine this way, I’ve kept it this short ever since I was sixteen years old. I think it’s very me, don’t you?”

Lydia nodded, “I like my hair like this. I think I would keep it that way, besides daddy really loves my hair long.”

“I think you’d look cute with short hair, but if this is how you like it you should keep it that way.”

Lydia thought about it for a second, “Maybe when I’m older...I’ll test out some new looks.”

“Didn’t you just test out these bangs little lady?”

Lydia was twelve years old when Emily first got sick. The doctors seemed hopeful in the beginning, said that her chance of beating it was sixty percent, but as time went on Emily got worse and worse. Emily’s once beautiful black hair was brittle and falling out as a reaction from the medication she was on, by the time the end was drawing near, she had only patches of hair left. Lydia remembered crying when her mom asked to braid her hair one more time, just hadn’t been able to do her own in so long, and even though Lydia was all grown up now, just once more Emily wanted to it. Slowly and deliberately Emily twisted Lydia’s blonde hair into two strands, and when she was done both women were in tears. Charles, who was silent for the whole thing, remarked how beautiful they both looked.

A few days later Emily took her last breath. Lydia and Charles at both sides of the bed, holding her hands in theirs. Lydia doesn’t remember much of what happened afterward, it was all a blur to her but it still pains Charles to play over in his mind how Lydia screamed and cried for her mother to come back, that she wasn’t ready to let go, how he had to pry his sobbing daughter away from her dead mother, Lydia’s arms still outstretched reaching for one more hug, one more kiss, one more time of Emily doing her hair. He regretted not letting her, at the time he found it morbid but he often wondered if he had just let her say goodbye on her own terms that she would be coped better. Instead of righting his wrongs, he simply tried to ignore it, and hope that Lydia would come around.

At home that night Lydia felt so numb, she had already cried so much that she couldn’t even make tears anymore. Her father was so busy preparing arrangements for the funeral and organizing family that he didn’t have time to console his grieving child. She would stand right in front of him, tears running down her face but he would dismiss her, as he scrambled to get everything in order. She never felt so alone, even with all the people constantly parading in and out of her house. Adults simply giving her pitiful looks as they went to talk to Charles about how strong he was and what a good example he was for Lydia. She could hear their whispers to each other, and their glances at the frail and meak little girl sitting on the stairs. She knew they wished she could just give them a polite smile or thank them when they gave their condolences. She couldn’t though, because she knew it was fake. They weren’t sorry for her loss, they were sorry that she hadn’t moved on. She couldn’t tell anybody how she felt, any time she tried they would just turn away.

Her aunt sat by her in the living room and instead of reading the tone, Lydia was silent and tearful, she picked up a picture frame of Lydia’s family and remarked, “You know, you look just like your father.”

She lost it, she managed a mousy, “I get that a lot.” before she ran up to her room, slammed the door and cried.

The night before the funeral Lydia came down the stairs and found her father clutching a framed photograph of Emily in his hands. Lydia stared at the photo. Her mother and father were dancing, something that Charles never did unless Emily coaxed him into it. They were younger, maybe in their twenties. Charles in the photograph had messier hair and was frozen in a laugh as he dipped Emily. Emily’s mouth was in a wide smile and her short black hair was fanned out behind her. Lydia held back a whimper as she snuck out the backdoor and walked down to the drug store a block away. It was a route she was familiar with, growing up in New York Lydia walked a lot of places, but talking to the drug store this time felt strange as if reality felt off. Mindlessly Lydia walked through the aisles, unsure of what she was even looking for until she stumbled into the rows of hair coloring. Cautiously she picked up a box in her hand and ran her fingers through her long blonde hair. Without saying a word she dropped the box on the counter, paid for it, and walked back home.

She went into the kitchen and grabbed a pair of gloves and a pair of scissors. She quietly went into the bathroom and set everything down, careful not to attract the attention of her father. She held a photograph of her mother up to the side of her face as she stared at herself in the mirror. She stayed emotionless as she applied the dye, showered, and dried her hair. Standing back in the mirror she twisted the now dark black hair around her fingers, looking back and forth between the photo of her mother and herself in the mirror. She picked up the scissors and aggressively started cutting, long curls of her hair falling to the floor. Tears were streaming liberally and her face burned a bright red as she sobbed. When she was done it was choppy, uneven, and short. Shorter than she had even had it before. The longest section rested above her chin, but it was exactly what she wanted. When she looked at her reflection she didn't even recognize who she was, but she felt like she was looking at a ghost.

“Lydia?” Charles called from downstairs, “What’s going on up there, are you alright?”

She gathered up the mess she made and threw it away before walking calmly down the stairs to greet her father. She hesitated on the banister, but there was no going back. She stood in front of her father and just waited for a response.

“What the hell did you do!” He screamed, “Oh my god Lydia, why did you do this? The funeral is tomorrow and you had to do this tonight, do you not think before you do things! Look at it-”

Lydia’s eyes started welling up with tears but she tried to keep herself under control. She knew he would be shocked, but she hadn't expected him to scream at her, not two days after her mother had died.

“Lydia your hair was beautiful! I loved it, your mother..she loved it! Why did you do this! What the hell have you done, can you please just explain why.”

Lydia couldn’t help herself, the dam broke and she started screaming back at him, she could feel angry and hot tears running down her face, and her chest felt so tight that she was afraid she couldn’t breathe. She wouldn’t give him a straightforward answer, she just yelled at him about everything that she had been feeling, for how everyone had been treating her.

“I’m invisible dad! Nobody sees me, you don’t see me. All you do is look at everyone else, and look at pictures. Well, guess what dad, now you have to look at me! DO YOU SEE ME NOW DAD!”

“I am looking right at you, I haven’t gone anywhere. It has just been a rough couple of days-”

“I am so sick of everyone telling me that. That it’s been rough, and that it’s going to get better. It’s not going to get better, they are liars because they can’t bring her back!”

He sagged his shoulders, “Lydia, I’m sorry you feel that way. I just, I don’t understand why you felt like you had to do this. You cut your hair, you dyed it black. We understand you’re in mourning, but isn’t this taking it too far!”

Lydia’s face contorted and she began to violently shake, she collapsed on the ground and sobs wracked through her tiny frame. She looked up at her father and whimpered, “Do I look like her?”

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madsruti · 4 years ago

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Not that I think someone will read this cause it's too long, but I talk about death so I could be triggering. Also, it's probably badly written because I cried while I was writing it and I don't want to revise it because I will cry again, but I don't really care right now. Anyways...

It's been a while. Much has changed and I feel like shit.

Tina died on July 17. I still can't talk about it and think about her without crying (yes, I'm crying right now). She was exactly 15 years and 6 months old. And she looked so tiny. And she was so cold. She got back to the ICU after my last post and then she never left. She died in my arms when I last visited her. She was sleeping and snoring. And cold. She wasn't able to keep her body temperature anymore. I held her for about five minutes and then it happened. I was alone with her. I have never seen someone die before. And just stupidly thought something along the lines of honey why are you coughing are you thirsty because I am a dumbass. I tried texting my mom (she was at the clinic too) but she wouldn't respond, so I had to leave Tina on the desk and try to get someone. I knew she had died, but I didn't know that it had already happened when she was in my arms. It killed me to think that she could have died on the table. I think I said before how I didn't want her to feel alone and abandoned, I'm glad I was with her when she died. I'm glad she died sleeping and didn't suffer. But I'm also a wreck. I can't not think about it when I remember these last few days. Or how I had to take her convulsing in my arms just a week before that. It was too much. It is too much.

I spent two weeks basically doing nothing after that. I cried a lot. And then her ashes came and I cried more. And now I feel sad and I feel longing every time I look at it (I'm not ready to spread it somewhere yet. I don't even know where it would be). Sometimes it's easy to pretend that she's back at my father's house instead of being with me and my mother. Sometimes I forget for a second and think oh I should make one extra nugget for Tina and then it hits me. I hid her stuff, but I'm not ready to let them go yet too. Just the other day I found one of her blankets inside one of my jacket's pockets from this day we went to visit her at the ICU and thought maybe we could bring her home... And I was crying again. I miss her so much. And I know she had a good life overall (especially these last few years), but I also can't stop thinking about what I should have done more or what I should have done differently, especially when she was a puppy. Even if back then I was also just a child and if my parents said Tina had to leave outside of the house, I couldn't do much. Why the fuck a pinscher had to live outside of the house? It changed after time, but still, my mom wouldn't allow her on the couch until like three years ago. I should have held her more. I should have taken her to more walks. I don't know, I should have done something more. I love her so much it feels like my heart is gonna explode and I don't know how to express myself. I'll never have a pet again. How some people have so many of them? Fuck, I can't. I can't. I feel like I've lost a part of me.

As I did nothing, I had a lot of time to think about life in general and how I wasn't happy with mine. Quarantine is obviously being a bitch. I like spending time alone at home, but not that much. I miss going out to eat with my friends. I miss going to the movies. I miss being alone because now my mom is working from home and she is here all the time (my mother hates being at home and she was always out doing whatever) and my neighbors whose walls we share are also home all the time and it's always so noisy I can't ever be truly alone. I know it's probably bullshit and some people live like this always and not just during a pandemic, but I'm used to being alone. Oh, how I miss those two years I lived by myself.

But besides being mentally fucked, I also have come to accept that I don't want a PhD. I told my parents I was dropping out and my mother freaked. So I got even more mentally fucked. I feel guilty about giving up, I feel guilty because I don't know what the hell I wanna do with my life and I just know that I don't want to be a graphic designer or a professor. And my mom makes me feel worse because she's always but why can't you just finish it it's just three more years and what are you going to do now why don't you do this and you know you gonna have to go back to college right and you probably won't enter a public university (which is free) but we also don't have enough money to support you and just a million things that I already know. She doesn't let me have a minute to think. It's like I'm dropping out on monday morning and in the afternoon I have to be already enrolled in something else. And let me tell you something, I know that I don't want to be a designer since the first semester at college. That's about fucking nine years ago. But I wasn't brave enough to accept it back then and I just sucked it up and finished it and continued to do it until now because it was easier. So no, I won't magically know what to know if I don't know what to do for the past nine years (you could say more, I was already lost in high school). And now I'm feeling sick like two to three times a week.

But the thing is, I want to do something. I really do. I don't want to spend the rest of my days on my mother's house couch browsing tiktok (cause that's what she probably thinks I wanna do). But I don't even know where to begin. So I'm seeing a therapist (although I'm not sure I'll be able to decide what I wanna do with my life with just that, but yeah pretty sure it's clear I've got other problems. Even if I already went to a therapist for I don't know six or seven years before that), I went to a psychiatrist (she said I don't need meds, so maybe I not as bad as I think, but I definitely need to keep going to therapy) and I know I need to find someone who does some kind of career advice thingy. Yeah, I'm pretty lost. I'm also very unproductive, not because I don't have classes to attend anymore but I could be doing something besides watching TV and youtube and tiktok and crying all day. I could be studying french. Dammit, I could be watching all those stuff in french. I could be drawing. I could be playing the guitar. I could be learning the piano since I already chose the one I want to buy but I haven't done it yet. It's so hard to begin to do things again and it hasn't been that long yet. It's just that it's not a vacation, it's hard for my brain to understand that it's ok to focus on my well being now and I don't have to do something that's gonna be work and earn me some money.

Maybe I should read this to my therapist. I'm not sure if I like her yet. Things don't make sense anymore. Time's moving differently. Why can't I just wake up ten years in the future? You know what would be easier? Yes.

Mads

#madsruti #dog #phdblr #death #???

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