#I might have missed a few things

[hinamie]

bw sketch practice before i leave on holiday !!

[deoidesign]

Return date for my webcomic, Time and Time Again!

It's been set for a while but sometimes they change the date without warning, so I'll keep you updated if anything changes!

I'm extremely proud of the work I've been doing on it, I can't wait to share everything!

See you then!

[raiiny-bay]

some WIPs from the 80s AU i never finished

[walkingstackofbooks]

"Are you happier? Now that the war is over?"

It had been meant as a serious question, but from the look on Kira's face, she hadn't caught onto that. "What sort of question is that, 'am I happier'?" she asked, laughing a little as she spoke. "Of course I am! Who isn't?"

Shrugging, Julian forced himself to smile back at her. "No, of course," he agreed. "Silly question."

His smile clearly hadn't been convincing: Kira's own smile had faded as she looked at him more closely, her eyebrows creasing into a frown.

"Have I done something to make you think I'm not?" she asked sharply. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"No-- no, nothing like that," Julian said hurriedly. "I mean, obviously Odo's gone now, and Keiko and the Chief, and Worf, and... and the Captain... But that-- That's different, isn't it, I guess. You can be sad and happy at the same time, right?"

He cringed, knowing that he hadn't quite managed to make sense there: years of practice had made him very good at recognising Kira's 'baffled' expression.

"All these years," said Kira, slowly shaking here head, "and I still don't understand you, sometimes. Of course I miss Odo, and the others -- and while we're at it, of course I'm still angry and-- and upset about the things that happened during the war..." She made a face, banging her fist lightly against the table. "Damn you, you know I'm no good with feelings, that's... there's a lot more there, besides," she added. "And I'm sure as hell not going into that right now...

"But if you're asking whether I'd rather be here, now, living without the threat of the Dominion or the Cardassians, knowing my friends are alive and safe -- and if they're not, at least being able to mourn them in peace, not having to make decisions that could get us all killed if it goes even slightly wrong... or if I'd rather be back there, in the war -- well. It's no contest, is it?"

"In theory, no, of course--"

"In theory?" Kira asked incredulously. "Julian, are you saying you were happier in the war?"

"No!" he exclaimed: that hadn't been what he'd meant at all. "The war was-- it was... Well, you couldn't be happy during the war, could you? Everything was too awful, it was impossible."

"A lot of the time, yeah," Kira said softly. "And that's gonna stick with us for a long time -- but they're only memories, now. We made it."

"We did," Julian said quietly, his eyes fixed on the table. "I just... I thought I'd be happier, I guess. Now that it's all over."

Kira reached forward, brushing her hand over his. "That's what this is all about?" she asked. "You aren't happy?"

"I never said I'm not," Julian objected hotly, looking back up at her -- but a sigh slipped out of him as he realised he didn't actually have an argument, and he shook his head, slumping back into his chair. Kira watched him, not saying anything.

"No, you're right," he admitted, pulling his arms across himself, almost too tight. "I know I'm supposed to be-- I know, after everything, it's so stupid... But, Nerys, I don't-- I don't think I am?"

Stopping to swallow the lump that had risen in his throat, he noticed he eyes had grown wet, which for some reason made him chuckle. "Isn't that silly?" he asked, leaning forward again. "We won the war, but I'm still not happy."

"No, Julian," Kira replied slowly. "I don't think that's silly at all. It's just... It's just very, very sad." She took a breath, reaching out to hold both his hands this time. "I'm sorry," she continued. "I didn't know."

"It's not your fault," he said, squeezing her hands tightly. "For a while, I just thought everyone else was pretending, too, so I just went along with it... And then I started to realise that no, you were all actually at least a little bit okay, and so I had to keep pretending, because happiness is so fragile and I didn't, you know, want to make anyone else feel bad just because I..."

He trailed off, shrugging a little. "I don't know, Nerys. I guess I just wanted to check that it wasn't just me, but it is just me, and now I've told you, and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad--"

"Julian, no," Kira interrupted. "Thank you for sharing this with me -- I'm glad you told me, okay?"

Ears growing hot, Julian ducked his head, not quite sure to do with the wave of emotion spilling over him. Now that he'd told her some of it, he kind of wanted to let everything out. Distractedly, he started tracing patterns on her hands, pushing into them with increasing intensity.

"It's just-- I'm just..." He stumbled over his words, struggling to give voice to the one thought that he'd been trying to ignore for months. "What if this is it for me? What if I'm like this forever? It's been years, Nerys--"

To his horror, his voice cracked, and he covered his mouth, trying to hold back the sobs that were threatening to burst out. Hoping that no-one else had noticed, he looked around the replimat; thankfully the other diners seemed more interested in their own conversations than in him and Kira.

"Would you like to go somewhere less public?" Kira asked. Not quite trusting himself to speak, he nodded, and together they left the replimat.

As they walked down the promenade and up to the habitat ring, Kira steered clear of their previous conversation, chatting about the station, her week, her latest grievance with Quark, and Julian was grateful for the respite. But as soon as they were sat down in her quarters, she turned to him with a most serious expression.

"It isn't right, you feeling like that, you know," she said. "I don't have the answers, I don't know how it gets better -- but we both know someone who would. You haven't tried telling Ezri any of this, have you?"

Julian's stomach tightened: Ezri was the last person he wanted to have this particular conversation with. "Oh, yes, because that would go so well," he retorted sarcastically. "Hi Ezri, I love you, but you don't make me happy. Don't worry, it's not you, I'm just unhappy most of the time. Most of the time? Yeah, it gets better when I'm around you, because then I just kind of feel... nothing. What an improvement!"

"Julian..." whispered Kira, but it was all coming out now and Julian couldn't make it stop. He rose from the sofa, starting to pace as he spoke.

"Did you ever make me happy? Maybe, sweetheart, but I'm not even certain of that. I might have been so desperate for anything even resembling happiness that I just deluded myself into thinking I was in love... Do I even love you? Who the fuck knows, Ezri. Is love even real, or did it die in the war along with every-fucking-thing else?"

His voice had risen louder than he'd intended, condemning him with every word it pushed forcefully into the air. He'd made Kira cry, he thought, but he couldn't quite be sure, his vision being clouded by his own mess of tears.

"How could I possibly tell her that?" he asked, sitting back down heavily, his voice dropping to a hollow whisper. "Kira, how the hell do I tell her that?"

"Come here," she said in way of a response, pulling him against her and holding him tightly, so that he could feel her lips move against his hair as she answered him. "I don't know," she was saying, "but you have to, Julian. I can be there with you if you want but, Prophets, Julian, you have to. How could you not?"

How could he not?

Julian closed his eyes and let himself fall apart against his friend, not even bothering to try to answer her. It was terrifying, after all this time, to finally allow someone to see how broken he really was, but he was far, far too tired to keep it in any longer.

[theswedishpajas]

I've been very busy with a game and might've stumbled into a favorite guy, as you might know from the "hear me out" tag game

[beebopboom]

ok I see that the Second coming is not planned traditionally by Heaven but the “father” or in other words - God

and it still probably was in the show but we do have the scene where Gabriel, Michael, Uriel, and Saraqael are talking about the plans of it like it is New Plan but we have evidence that maybe it’s been in the works for a while 

they are getting ready for the Second Coming but maybe someone (*cough*metatron*cough*) knows that Heaven has no idea where Jesus is - the last missing piece - and maybe that’s why the Metatron doesn’t really care what is going on with Gabriel - he doesn’t need him. In removing Gabriel who has such a high standing it creates a power vacuum and the Metatron uses Gabriel’s little disobedience to his advantage and puts in the angel he actually need - i’m getting off track here

as for Jesus not being draped in blue - he’s not in his first life when he is on the Cross - he is in white and the ground is draped in red cloth

he is however in the Resurrectionist sign which I feel is a little bit more relevant than the crucifixion clothes- he is in blue and orange 

(Hastur is a bit pushy in meddigo see that as you will but it is the most common type of temptation we see)

Now Mrs. Dowlings outfit is red and pinks - which they are the intended parents of the Anticrist makes sense that the baby draped in red would go to the parents draped in red, as for the pearls they have been equated with eyes, particularly Michael’s. Which I wouldn’t be surprised that angels were watching this all go down, they wanted Armageddon just as much. I mean Gabriel is off telling Aziraphale about it so that leaves Michael as next in line, reporting in - it was all going to plan.

Until the Young’s were early by a week - If Warlock is Jesus I don’t think God ever intended for him to be wrapped up in the swap - I mean with the Second Coming you need to have the Antichrist first and then Jesus can come back - he was to live a quiet humble life with the Young’s until he was needed (but he was there and now God gets to have an even bigger laugh)

but you can never entirely predict humans - Not even God, I mean that was the whole point of free will wasn’t it

Now Mrs. Young’s outfit when you described it immediately reminded me of the third person we see and have a long focus on by herself at the Crucifixion - Mary Magdalene I think, I could be wrong

Not a lot is known about her but she is present at Jesus’s resurrection

I don’t know if you read my Angel Clothes meta (and you don’t have too it is sooo long) but basically I equated the blue that we see angels wear (besides Aziraphale) is specifically for the Second Coming or Jesus but more importantly symbolically blue is for a change that is happening or going to happen in heaven or heavens influence. And now that I’m thinking about it I wouldn’t say white is a symbol of being not marred but rather complacent with Heaven - a complacent blank slate - which I would say is a good descriptor for our third baby 

but anyway Warlock not getting a description from anyone - I didn’t notice that before. And my first thought was, of course not you don’t reveal anything about your Ace and I think that still stands - not saying anything was intentional - let him fly under the radar

Now as we learn later with Adam he can influence those around him - it wouldn’t be to far fetched (it’s not at all) to say Jesus would have similar powers - just in a “good” way

and what’s the first thing Thaddeus does when they bring Warlock into the room? - he gets sentimental, has a change of heart, saying he’s going to play baseball with him, go fishing, and just be there

I mean that doesn’t end up happening but yknow an interesting moment

but you know who is there or at least around more - his mom who dressed in orange the next time we see her (I like your explanation for orange=god)

As for Warlocks current outfits they are rather blue forward - heavenly. Until he starts getting Hells (Crowley’s) influence - with the red and black. Warlock was influenced by both Heaven and Hell, and he wasn’t meant to be

but my whole point of doing this was if the story happens to take us this way - the choice between the two, Warlock and Greasy Johnson, is going to be hard for us and Heaven

(absolute crack of “evidence” incoming

the egg and cress sandwiches that Mrs. Young wants

eggs now with Easter represent the Resurrection, specifically the tomb opening

watercress is said to have “cross-like” flowers and healing “powers” - i’d recommend the link there is more to it

do with this as you will)



Greasy Johnson: a Red Herring?

This is a season 3 speculation post - you know not what to do with them

ok so i’ve fallen down a Greasy Johnson is Jesus rabbit hole and I love it - seems pretty plausible (here are some of of the pieces that sent me down here - Jesus 2.0 rides a Motorcycle Scooter , Greasy Johnson is Jesus, and Greasy Johnson in the book)

To summarize Greasy Johnson is the third baby in the swap who grows up near Adam and has kind of a “rival gang” who in the book is used as the reason why Adam finds a fight between two rivals ridiculous

plus you have the working title for the talked about sequel 668: The Neighbor of the Beast which more than likely is Greasy Johnson house and his thing with tropical fish - just a lot of things pointing to him being Jesus

But!! I want to talk about something a little different (and I can recognize this is probably just my want for Warlock to come back as someone important) because it was a choice not have him mentioned after the swap in the show.

What if Warlock is Jesus? Now just hear me out

If i’m following the swap right Warlock is our baby draped in blue and is the Young’s actual son

Now going back a bit I believe Heaven has been testing out aspects of what is said to happen in the Second Coming for a while now maybe as far back as 1827 but probably got close to right around 1941 and was just waiting for Hell to have the Antichrist and trigger Armageddon

and yknow for being an order of satanic nuns they sure do have a lot of Jesus on the Cross hanging around. why? - it’s almost like the were also meant to deliver him as well

So when Hell pulled their final card - so did Heaven

Now who was not meant to be there that night and messed everything up - the Young’s and their baby, Warlock - it’s almost like it was a divine intervention. And like I said earlier Warlock is our baby draped in blue (like Jesus) and our Ace card (ace up their sleeve anyone?)

Greasy Johnson was apart of Hells plan and set up - Warlock was not

also he has traveled the world because of the Dowling’s work before being tempted by Hastur which he denies

and the whales and dinosaurs we see in his room - you got your mothers humor don’t you?

and he is the only one who has to make a return to the UK - the plane in the opening sequence

what about Greasy Johnson and the neighbor of the beast though? that seems to be a pretty great fit and I agree - he is going to be the reason the swap is discovered and they all get together again - whatever that reason may be (*cough*dying*cough*)

and not mentioning him further in season one allows for him to come in as a completely new character and story that we get to follow around with points in his life pointing towards him being Jesus - as a distraction for the characters and for us

but where does Aziraphale come into this and why does the Metatron need an angel of his talents? - Heaven has also lost its card(baby), the trick worked a little too well and there are still two children to choose between, if they could find them - and Aziraphale, who has shown is apt at finding and identifying the Antichrist and knows Earth better than any angel, is just the being for the job

I recognize this is a lot of speculation and this is just kinda just a crack theory but it wouldn’t leave me alone so I’d thought I’d share

and mostly I think it’d be funny that in thinking they were raising the Antichrist they were actually raising Jesus Christ

(but also it would fit a lot of the headcannons floating around. Jesus being a right terror? check. Them raising Jesus? already did that. Trans!Jesus? remember all those trans!warlock headcannons. Jesus having a mentor relationship with Crowley? the demon raised Warlock. Going out for a drink? Warlock would an adult now by the time season 3 comes out and they keep following that the events in the show are happening at the present time it comes out trend - just on and on)

[dimension-20-every-introduction]

Everyone Introduced in Dimension 20's Fantasy High: Junior Year episode 17

[uncanny-tranny]

Also, in response to the "testosterone making people angrier" myth, I've found that, personally, testosterone has given me the self-respect to recognize and call out when my boundaries are being overstepped in ways that I wouldn't have had the courage (or, frankly even liking of myself) to have done before. This is in addition to me working on my trauma responses, but testosterone was the spark that gave me the will to do this in the first place. When I see people sae that as anger and thus is a "bad thing," I wonder how much of that is just people being uncomfortable with us... having boundaries or enforcing them, and that the response to that overstepping is labeled as aggressive anger.

Frankly, I now actually respect myself enough to care when I am being mistreated. It seems that people sometimes take that as a personal failure on my end because I don't think I deserve mistreatment.

Caveat: Anger is a fine emotion, and it is a worthy thing to recognize and honour. I find that the accusation of trans men* and trans masc* people "being angry" on testosterone is a moot point simply because it is often a false accusation which uses anger as a punishment. My issue isn't that we're "angry," but that our perceived anger is used, often, as a transphobic bludgeon to punish those who either want to transition with testosterone or who currently are, and everything in-between.

[nikolas-ghostbusters-fixation]

Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.

I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.

I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??

Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.

[deus-ex-mona]

just a tl of lxl's tv guide interview~

Q1: First off, please introduce yourselves!

Aizo: It’s nice to meet you guys! I’m Aizo.

Yujiro: And I’m Yujiro! The two of us make up the idol unit of LIPxLIP.

Aizo: We sing with all we’ve got to bring happiness to our listeners.

Yujiro: We’ve released many MVs as well, so please check them out as well.

Aizo: We also give it our all when we’re shooting our MVs, so you’ll be able to see us being all cool in them!

Yujiro: That sure is a lot of “all”s that we’ve given, Aizo.

Aizo: That’s cuz I really give it my all in everything we do. You do the same, right?

Yujiro: Of course I do. There isn’t a single day when I’m not giving it my all.

Aizo: See? You look calm and composed most of the time, but you’re actually a pretty passionate guy, huh?

Yujiro: It’s because you’re always giving it your all that I feel like I can’t lose either.

Aizo: There it is, your tendency of hating to lose.

Yujiro: Well, we both hate to lose, don’t we?

Aizo: But, Yujiro, you’re able to do everything so easily without seeming bothered by the thought of falling behind, which never fails to surprise me every time.

Yujiro: I guess you’re the opposite of me in that regard, Aizo. You’re a straightforward open book. I think that any onlooker will be able to tell how much you love singing and how much fun you’re having at work.

Aizo: Eh? Do I really look like I’m having that much fun?

Yujiro: You’re always excited when we’re on site. But, Aizo, you’re actually surprisingly calm and even more observant of your surroundings than I am of mine. Even when I’m distressed, you’re the one who notices it faster than anyone else, Aizo…

Aizo: I’ve told you that you should ask for help when you’re troubled, but you really can’t be honest, huh? (laughs)

Yujiro: …Right now, I’m troubled by you and the way you’re smirking at me, Aizo.

Q2: What was the response to your 2nd Album “Be Grateful You Were Born!” like?

Aizo: Since this was our first album in a long time, we have received a lot of responses from our Julieta (what they call their fans) who have been anticipating its release. We’re really happy that it brought joy to them.

Yujiro: We had performed “White Day Kiss” live, so there were many Julieta who were looking forward to its album release too.

Aizo: Also, Narumi (Sena) who starred in the MV for “Julieta”, the sequel to “Romeo” from our previous album, congratulated us too. She said that she’ll recommend the album to her friends as well, which I appreciate!

Yujiro: I will be really happy if people who don’t know of us yet can get to know and support us through this album.

Aizo: We’ll continue to work hard as LIPxLIP with all we’ve got, so please root for us!

Q3: What were the challenges that you faced with this album?

Aizo: Well, it’s more like we faced so many new challenges that I don’t know where to start. (laughs)

Yujiro: In terms of the mood of the songs, I think “Meoto” with its Japanese taste and the Arabian-esque “A.B.Secret” have a very new feel to them compared to our other songs as LIPxLIP.

Aizo: We changed the way we sang to suit each and every song too, so I think we were able to show you new sides of us. For “Meoto”, I was conscious of the way I sang to fit the role I played in the setting of the song, and for “A.B.Secret”, there was that rap-like dialogue.

Yujiro: You may be surprised by the difference in intensity if you listen to “Oshi no Mahou” and “Yurushite Santa-san” after those songs. (laughs)

Aizo: With the “LOVE chu chu”s and the “Please, Santa-san”s, right? I’ll be thrilled if you can feel not just our coolness, but also our cuteness as idols! But… even though I was the one who said all that I’m starting to feel embarrassed.

Q4: The album has songs that would be a hit at live concerts, such as “Oshi no Mahou”, with its fun call-and-response bits.

Aizo: It goes without say that I definitely want to do the call and response with our Julieta!

Yujiro: Same here. I’ll be happy if everyone memorised it and came to watch us perform when that day comes.

Aizo: It’ll be super fun, right?! I’m looking forward to hyping up the venue and making it echo with all our voices.

Yujiro: Is there anything else that you’d like to do during the performance?

Aizo: Hmm, well… Maybe we’ll make a Möbius loop together with the audience… wait, the ideas won’t stop flowing if we carry on like this. (laughs)

Yujiro: Yeah, you’re right. (laughs) Let’s leave the details of the performance as something that our audience can look forward to when the time comes.

Q5: Tell us the secret stories behind the shootings of your MVs!

Aizo: I had a feeling when I heard Yujiro sing “Anata” in his lines in “Meoto”... But I was still surprised when I found out that Yujiro was dressed up in the role of a girl during the MV shooting. But, y’know, it suited you amazingly~. The air your makeup gave off was also different from how it’s like during our usual jacket photoshoots and live concerts, so I was a little charmed by you (laughs).

Yujiro: Thanks. Although I played the role of a woman this time, the costume I wore was a fantastical gorgeous kimono, within a unique setting, so it was easy for me to get into my role without feeling uncomfortable.

Aizo: I really didn’t feel uncomfortable at all either.

Yujiro: You looked good in your bewitching horned costume yourself, Aizo. It brought out your coolness, and you looked strong too.

Aizo: Right?! I was really pumped with all of the manly accessories like the horns, the mask, and the patterns drawn on my body.

Yujiro: Your long sharp nails suited you too. And in the MV, there’s a scene where the pair, played by me and Aizo, open their hearts to each other and hold hands while standing shoulder to shoulder. Be sure to pay attention to the contrast between our hands, okay?

Aizo: Speaking of the shooting, when I was hugging Yujiro during the filming of that shoulder to shoulder scene, I could smell a wonderful fragrance coming off of him. I was really surprised at the time, y’know? (laughs) “He smells so good!” I thought.

Yujiro: The staff had prepared some perfume for me. Although the fragrance can’t be conveyed through the screen, they had hoped to enhance the vividness of the setting for the viewers by having me wear the perfume as we filmed. I thought that it was a wonderful idea, so I had the staff apply the perfume to my costume. 

Aizo: For “A.B.Secret”, we filmed a live concert called “Arabian Nights in the Dunes”, which was yet another tough day. (laughs)

Yujiro: To be honest, we got lost on the way to the venue, so we had to cross several dunes.

Aizo: We may look all nonchalant in the MV, but we’d used quite a lot of our stamina. I’m just glad that we were able to make it to the venue in one piece…

Yujiro: But we were treated to a lot of wonderful food after our performance, so I’d say that it had been a very satisfying day.

Q6: Since this is a TV guide… What TV programmes do the two of you tend to watch?

Yujiro: I watch all kinds of shows, but I tend to watch talk shows often. I think that it’s great that I’m able to learn about current events from all over the world in the form of an entertaining programme, no less.

Aizo: You don’t just check the news or something? You sure are a diligent one, Yujiro.

Yujiro: I watch talk shows just because they’re interesting. If I just want to know the news, I wouldn’t particularly watch a talk show for it.

Aizo: I watch them every so often myself, but I only watch the segments that introduce restaurants that serve good food or amusement park events.

Yujiro: I see. You watch TV too, Aizo? I had the impression that you’d be often off running outside or something instead.

Aizo: Well, I do watch TV, y’know? I like watching programmes hosted by their namesake comedians. And I check out singing programmes without fail.

Yujiro: Yeah, I watch music programmes often too.

Aizo: It goes without say that I check out my favourite bands and artistes too, but I have to know what the current trends are on the rankings! As idols, we can’t afford to lose to others and all.

Yujiro: Though, I do occasionally get hooked on particular trends just from checking them out. (laughs)

Q7: Going off the name of your album, please express your gratitude for each other and your Julieta!

Yujiro: Do you even have anything to be grateful to me for…?

Aizo: Yeah. I’m grateful to always have you as a nice wall for a rival.

Yujiro: A nice wall? Is that supposed to be a compliment?

Aizo: Yes, it’s a compliment. For example, I do pretty well in my studies and sports at school, but when I look at you, Yujiro, I find myself thinking that I can’t be satisfied with the way things are yet. I’m able to grow steadily because I have you as my literal worthy opponent.

Yujiro: You’re really grateful to me, huh?

Aizo: Well, since we have the opportunity now, why not? How about you? You’re not gonna say that you have nothing, are you?

Yujiro: Yeah. I have something too.

Aizo: Ooh, what is it, what is it? 

Yujiro: There has been a lot of pollen in the air lately. So, when I sneezed, you immediately gave me some pocket tissue, the soft kind. You really saved me back then, so I’m grateful to you.

Aizo: Is that simple thing all you’re grateful for…?

Yujiro: Sorry, I was just kidding. (laughs) As I had touched on in an earlier question, whenever I’m depressed or distressed, you’re the first one to notice, Aizo. I tend to overthink all kinds of things, but you always make my worries disappear. So I’m always grateful to you for that, Aizo.

Aizo: Huh, so you do have a proper one after all.

Yujiro: It’s embarrassing to be this honest, so let’s keep this between us, okay?

Aizo: It’d be nice if you could be honest all the time, though.

Yujiro: More importantly, we have to honestly express our gratitude for our Julieta.

Aizo: Yeah. We’re more grateful to our Julieta than anything.

Yujiro: Thank you so much for cheering us on, Julieta.

Aizo: We were only able to release our new album thanks to your support, Julieta. We are able to continue on as LIPxLIP thanks to every one of you who listens to our songs, buys our albums, and sends us your thoughts and cheers.

Yujiro: Julieta, I’m grateful to you from the bottom of my heart. Also, I’d like to express my gratitude that you were born in this era and that you and us were able to meet like this.

Aizo: We will continue to do our very best so that we can return the love that we have received from you, Julieta, many times over.

Both: Please cheer us on!

Q8: What was your first trip together like?

Aizo: There were some pranks, and there were times when I felt exasperated, but it was truly a ton of fun!

Yujiro: We haven’t had many opportunities to go on a trip till now, so it was a really great experience for us. 

Aizo: We got to see many places, plus thanks to the fact that we were in charge of the voiceover for the Izumo guided tour, we had a good knowledge about the places of interest and we were able to enjoy ourselves to the fullest.

Yujiro: I especially liked the footbaths. When I dipped my feet into the footbath after a tiring walk, I was truly impressed by how much it helped to relieve my fatigue.

Aizo: It’s amazing how it completely warmed your feet up, huh?

Yujiro: Yeah, its healing properties are amazing.

Aizo: No, y’see, your feet were flushed pink from the warmth of the water in the footbath after soaking in it for a while. When you took your feet out of the hot water, saying “It’s hot.”, it looked like you were wearing pink socks, which I found rather funny.

Yujiro: …If you want to bring that up, should I release that video of you scooting around on your butt to grab a towel with your legs raised up in the air because you had nowhere to put your wet feet?

Aizo: When did you even take that video…?

[ottiliere]

nice nose

when I checked tumblr and saw this dane and i were laying on the floor idly chatting... this was really exciting to be met with. you got his teeth right, they're pretty janky. he hasn't been to the dentist much.

[wylanslcve]

Okay don't mind me I'm in the middle of a Crooked Kingdom reread and feel overwhelmingly inclined to rant about Jesper Fahey because this fandom just doesn't give him the treatment he deserves. I'm specifically going to incoherently ramble about the scene in Crooked Kingdom where he, Colm and Wylan are being shot at because I feel like that scene is representative of Jesper's arc - but, before we dive into that, let me contextualise a few things first. Jesper does things for the thrill of it: he thrives off chaos and spontaneity, hence why he "always felt better when people were shooting at him". It's because the sound of gunfire "called the scattered, irascible, permanently seeking part of his mind into focus like nothing else" - and it also provides a distraction from his pain and trauma, because whenever he'd think about it, "everything in him recoiled. Trying not to die was the best possible distraction". Whenever anything to do with his past or his debt is brought up, "his hands returned to his revolvers" because he found himself "longing for the cool, familiar feel of their pearl handles beneath his thumbs". It steadies him as much as it possibly can when he's not in a dangerous situation, momentarily calling his mind into focus, an attempt at distracting himself from his afflictions.

Based off similar instances, the scene in Crooked Kingdom where he, Wylan and Colm are being shot at should have brought him that same satisfaction that any other shooting would. He "should be buzzing from the excitement of the fight. The thrill was still there, fizzing through his blood, but beside it was a cold, unfamiliar sensation that felt like it was draining the joy from him." What makes this situation so different to the others is that he can't ignore his problems and trauma now: it's staring him right in the face. Colm is right there. The thrill of the fight doesn't feel the same because "all he could think was, Da could have been hurt. He could have died." And we know that Jesper's debt would cost Colm the jurda farm Jesper grew up on, forcing him to acknowledge the reality of his problems: with Colm being right there, Jesper just can't ignore his afflictions because all he could think about is how his father would "suffer for his antics". If you ask me, this is so representative of his character arc as a whole.

This is further emphasised by how he's reflecting on the first time he spun Makker's Wheel right before this ambush, its intention being merely "harmless fun", but it ended up evolving into an addiction that "split [his life] like a log into two distinct and uneven pieces: the time before he’d stepped up to that wheel and every day since". The rush of a high-stakes situation is the equivalent of the "harmless fun" - it's a thrill that Jesper enjoys feeling, but in reality it's doing much more harm because it's preventing him from acknowledging and facing his pain. And he's indeed in so much pain: there's so much anguish inside of him, but he'd do anything to distract himself from it because the reality is just too painful.

This is where the tables come in: later in Crooked Kingdom, when the crew are being ambushed by the Khergud, Jesper "could feel the pull of East Stave" because he didn't have anything else to occupy his mind with. Then, the minute he thinks about facing his father, "the need to be at the tables was overwhelming" because he desperately needs to distract himself from the reality of his circumstances: "since Kaz hadn't obliged him with something to shoot at, Jesper needed a pair of dice and long odds to clear his mind". He can't use the ambush as a distraction, so the tables it is. As Inej tells him, "they feel like medicine. They soothe you, put you right for a time. But they’re poison, Jesper. Every time you play, you take another sip." This isn't the first time poison has been used to represent something that is preventing the Crows from healing - we also see it with Matthias, when he tells Brum in Six of Crows, "the life you live, the hate you feel - it's poison. I can drink it no longer". Just like how the exploitation of Matthias' grief and pain as a means of fueling hatred prevented him from healing because it kept exacerbating the anguish within him (he had to stop drinking the poison to do so), Jesper's addiction - and, by extension, the thrill of a high-stakes situation - prevents him from acknowledging the wound inside him and working towards healing it. It gets to the extent where “he had always thought of himself as lucky… what if he’d been bluffing this whole time?” - he’s gotten so used to suppressing his pain that he, in a way, loses sense of who he is. His façade has distorted his perception of himself. It's not until Colm arrives in the Barrel that Jesper is forced to acknowledge just how deep that wound is and how much it's festering - just like how he couldn't even feel the thrill of a fight properly because of the possibility of his father getting hurt.

That scene is one of many cracks that start to form as Jesper continues to bottle up all of this pain and trauma, until he finally breaks when Wylan proposes that he's such a good shot because being a Fabrikator allows him to direct the metal of the bullets. Jesper protests, asking Wylan why he can't "just let things be easy" - why can't he just let him keep ignoring his problems, when it's so much easier than facing them? But Wylan stands his ground, explaining that "they’re not easy... You keep pretending everything is okay. You move on to the next fight or the next party. What are you afraid is going to happen if you stop?" This is why Matthias calls Jesper “angry and frightened” - he’s afraid of stopping, because he knows stopping means that he’s forced to face the reality that he’s deeply wounded. This is when he finally breaks under the burden of his own pain, under the reality that he can't keep ignoring it anymore - hence why he chooses to put his share of the reward in Colm's name because, as he explains to Kaz, "I don’t think I’m ready for that kind of money just yet". For the first time, he's acknowledging his problems and working towards fixing them, no matter how much time it takes (because trauma and addiction don't just disappear overnight).

n e ways this ended up being significantly longer than anticipated but this is what happens when I start analysing these books: it snowballs out of control and suddenly I can’t shut up.

[suddencolds]

.~

[circusk]

just spent HOURSS!!!!! of my day . making fop family tree. its got 63 people rn uhmmm yeah

i think i have everyone . maybeee missing a cousin or two idk

[krypt-kir]

Time to update my info I guess

[birb--birb]

The Fool and the World!! 💛💛

aweeh excellent choices!! I thought too much about the World for him and now have a massive block of text about Savrin getting a happy ending 😭💕 thank yoouuu friend!! @spiritsong

Fool: Where did Rooks journey begin? What were they doing before joining the Veilguard?

Savrin has been a full Crow for like.... 12 years at this point? So helping look after some of the fledgling Crows in House De RIva (and by helping I mean teaching them how to get away with shit without Viago catching on, typical big brother role lmao). But aside from spending evenings on Treviso's rooftops (with or without cheap wine and a cute person to make out with), the usual Crow contracts re: keeping people in check around the city, and pushing back against the Antaam, Savrin was actually looking for his mom. She was a fellow Crow and was assigned to a very hush-hush mission in Val Royeaux when Savrin was 10. Its been 2 years since they'd last heard from her and while Savrin knows her letters have always been far and few between, he also knows somethings not right. The Talons wouldn't let him go look for her, but they're doing what they can to find her. Savrin's been in a mood for the last couple months after fighting with Viago about not being allowed to go look for her alone, so the in-game lore of "Rook attacks a group of Antaam and gets sent away" kinda connects.

World: What does happily-ever-after look like for Rook? Is it attainable, or just wishful thinking?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, especially since he's like one of my few OC's who gets a happy ending.

Savrin never really expected much for himself, he knows being a Crow can be dangerous (and has almost had his story end many a times already) and kind of envisioned himself either living long enough to become a trainer of bebe Crows or get killed while out on a mission. He doesn't want to be a Talon or run his own House, he's quite content with his lil family of De Rivas! Savrins very much a "We'll see what the next year holds and go from there" kinda person, and lowkey expects to be killed on a contract (he's made his peace with his mortality a long time ago). So I guess his happily-ever-after would be having the ability to travel Thedas and experience new things, find out what happened to his mom, maybe find a special someone(s) that he enjoys being around. Just being able to continue experiencing new and beautiful things out in this world for as long as he can.

In reality, he got so much more than he ever could have hoped for💕 seeing all these new amazing places through the Eluvians, meeting incredible people who challenged him and pushed him to be better for himself and their own sake, working with people he'll cherish for the rest of his life!

Hell, meeting Emmrich, growing closer to the necromancer, and having the realization of "I want to wake up with this incredible man in my arms for as long as this life will let me... is this what they mean by love?" was so unexpected for him! Seeing Emmrich be so gentle and thoughtful with Manfred and all the other spirits he comes across, watching him throw himself into this fight against the gods despite his fear of dying, knowing that he's always there to back Savrin and the crew up even in the most harrowing of situations. Emmrich showed him a sort of gentleness he didn't think he deserved. Where Emmrich settles the souls of the dead, Savrin sends them to their deaths, sometime agonizingly so. This little Crow is forever changed knowing that someone with such a gentle heart chooses to stay by his side, and continues to shower him in a kind of love he never thought he'd experience. Savrin still doesn't know what his future will hold (right now, hopefully a goddamn break holy shit saving the world is hard), but he's forever grateful it will have Emmrich in it, and he'll treasure that for as long as he can.