#I mean we're already off to a not great start because despite getting a lot of her owl facts right she falls into the same old pop culture

[heepthecheep]

The Guardians of Ga'Hoole's various plots are already wild, but The Wolves of the Beyond is just... bizarre

[atlabeth]

unadulterated loathing (pt 1)

masterlist

pairing: fiyero tigelaar x fem reader

summary: you are forced to partner up with fiyero on a history project. things don’t go as you imagine.

a/n: wicked was really good, i love jonathan bailey, and we're coming up on finals season which means im writing about how stressed i am. also halfway through this i realized reader is lowkey paris geller coded lmao. this got away from me so im splitting it into 2 parts, i had a lot of fun writing it so enjoy! also im high posting this so if there's any editing issues im sorry lol!!

wc: 5.5k

warning(s): reader is stressed to the max constantly. she is kinda mean to fiyero but he's into it so it's okay. mostly fluff

Your fingers were beginning to cramp. 

You should have been used to this by now with Doctor Dillamond. You’d been in his class for a few months now, and you graded essays for him often. He often had a propensity for verbosity, but this lecture had been an especially hefty one in preparation for your midterm projects.

He would be announcing partners before the end of class—much to your dismay, for you worked far better on your own than with others holding you down—and you figured you would want to have as much of a head start as possible. 

Great Oz, how you hoped you would be paired with one of your friends. Coralie and Ezura were your only contenders for top of the class—Elphaba had potential as well, not because of the magic she couldn’t control but because of the brain she very well could—and anyone else would frankly slow you down. Doing a large research paper with someone who didn’t care as much as you did would be a drag you didn’t care to go through. 

Midterms were only the most important thing, for they set the track towards finals and affirmed your skill with your assignments, and your first midterm was potentially the most important thing for, when completed successfully, set you on the correct track altogether. 

You tried not to think about it too much (though you failed almost immediately), for you were sure Doctor Dillamond would honor all the work you’d done for him by putting you with a suitable partner. 

“I see some of you are getting restless, so I will cut class short today.” Your eyes snapped up from your paper to see the professor smiling, and you could hear sighs of relief around the room. “I’m sure you’re all eager to know your partners for the midterm paper.” 

The sighs of relief turned to groans, and you had to agree. Assigned partners should have been considered archaic at this point in time. 

Doctor Dillamond trotted back to the projector and, with a bit of difficulty, replaced the image with a piece of paper. Everybody in the class was paired off in groups of two—you immediately started searching for your name, squinting slightly to see despite your spot in the front, and the furrow between your brows deepened when you realized you couldn’t find it. 

You searched instead for your hopeful options. Coralie was with Mayara, Ezura was with Nicholas, Elphaba was with Galinda—of course. You let out a slight huff of annoyance, not just at your disappointment but at the continued lack of your name. 

Perhaps he’d merely forgotten. You didn’t know how Dillamond could have forgotten you, seeing as you were only his best student and literal TA, but things happened. Your anxieties only grew as you heard the beginnings of whispers throughout the room as your classmates saw their pairings, either excited or dismal. 

“Class is dismissed,” Doctor Dillamond said. The room began bustling as students gathered their things, already talking with their friends or searching out their project partner—you heard Galinda squeal and saw her grab Elphaba’s hands out of your peripherals. You could only worry your lip between your teeth as you swept everything in your bag, hardly waiting a second before rushing up to Dillamond’s desk. 

“You didn’t call my name, professor,” you said, managing a smile as you tried to act like it wasn’t killing you. How could he have not called your name? Was there something wrong? Great Oz— had you been somehow moved out of the class? Was your work not exemplary enough? Your assistance not assisting enough? “I don’t have a partner.” 

His mouth opened, but you only found yourself continuing, the words practically tumbling out of you.  

“Of course, if you intended for me to be on my own then I am perfectly alright with that!” Your smile widened as your fingertips dangled over his desk. “I— I prefer it, in fact, so if that is it then there is really no issue at all—”

“Mr. Tigelaar!” he interrupted, and your head turned on instinct to see the eponymous boy arm in arm with Galinda (who was arm in arm with Elphaba) just in front of the door. “I hope you are not about to leave.”

Fiyero flashed a look at his companions before offering one of those easy smiles he seemed to always have up his sleeve. “You dismissed the class. I believe I am part of your class, am I not?”

“You are,” he said, “but you were not assigned a partner. Surely you wouldn’t be trying to get out of the project.”

Your free hand clenched as the threads started to connect. Doctor Dillamond wouldn’t do this to you. Would he?

That easy smile remained on his lips as he turned to Galinda and whispered something in her ear. She giggled and pecked him on the cheek before she walked out, pulling Elphaba behind her, and Fiyero sauntered over. 

“Of course I’m not trying to get out of it,” he said. “Whyever would you think so?”

“Your attempt at a quick exit before you could be assigned a partner,” the professor said. “But it is no matter, for your partner is right here.”

You blinked. He would do this to you.

Why would he do this to you?

“Well, pleasure to meet you.” He held out his hand. “Fiyero Tigelaar.”

You ignored him, for you couldn’t look away from Doctor Dillamond. Would it be mad for you to strangle a Goat?

“Professor,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady, “why?”

“Mr. Tigelaar’s grades in my class have not been satisfactory, as I’m sure he is aware.” Dillamond moved away from his desk, prodding the chalkboard with his head to move it out of the way. “I care about all my students, even if they seem not to care for my course. I believe a partnership for the two of you would be beneficial.”

Your jaw clenched. “So you’re forcing me to tutor him because he hasn’t got a brain.”

Fiyero chuckled. “Ouch.”

“Not tutoring, just working on your midterm together,” he said. “And if you end up teaching him a few things along the way, then we would all be better off, wouldn’t we?” 

“Professor, with all due respect, this is ridiculous!” you exclaimed. “Why should I have to risk my grade, my midterm, my standing altogether at Shiz just to help him?” 

“Should you perform the way that is typical of you, there should be no issues.” Doctor Dillamond gave you that professorly look and your teeth grinded against each other. How dare he try to take the moral high ground. “Now, the two of you better hurry off. You haven’t got forever to work on this project.” 

“Professor,” you whispered, determined to not let up, “why are you punishing me like this?”

“I’m not punishing you, my dear.”

“Fiyero couldn’t care less about any of this,” you insisted. “I’m going to fail my midterm and it will be all his fault!”

“If you believe he can make you fail, then you haven’t got as much faith in yourself as I believed.” Doctor Dillamond looked at you. “Trust me—and yourself—that this will all work out.”

You stared back—it was rather difficult to have a staring contest with a Goat. “I don’t suppose I can change your mind on this?”

“You’d be correct.”

You huffed and glanced away. “Fine. But expect those test scores to take an extra day.”

He let out a bleaty sort of laugh while you walked away. You considered it a credit to yourself that you held back the childish tantrum you wanted to throw as you moved back over to your desk to gather the rest of your things. You shoved your books into your bag with a bit more anger than necessary, and you heard footsteps behind you. You glanced over to see Fiyero sidled up beside you, leaning against the desk next to yours. 

“Surely you won’t be this irritated at me the entirety of our project.” He still had that unbothered smile on his lips, and it made you want to hit him. “It might make this a much more miserable partnership.”

You let out a mirthless laugh as you shouldered your bag. “Don’t act like this pains you. You’re just going to ride my coattails the entire time.” 

“You know, I hadn’t even thought of that,” Fiyero mused. “But now that you bring it up, I just may have to.” 

“For the love of Oz,” you muttered to yourself before mustering the strength to look up at him. “I have a myriad of things I need to do today. Why don’t you go bother your girlfriend for the rest of the day, and then you can meet me at the library first thing tomorrow morning so we can discuss all of this.” 

He shrugged. “Sounds alright to me.” 

“Good,” you said. “Because I meant every word I said back there. I will not have you ruining all my progress thus far because of your absolute refusal to think.” 

“It looks as if you could take a page out of my book,” Fiyero said. “You seem awfully stressed.” 

Your lips tightened into a mirthless smile. “I’m stressed because of you, Fiyero, and we have hardly even interacted. I dread to think of my mental state after a week of working together. Now, good day. I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

You swept past him and walked out of Doctor Dillamond’s classroom. You felt his eyes on you until you turned the corner, and you had to resist the urge to look back. 

Oh, how you loathed group projects. 

-

The rest of your day was far more demanderating than it should have been, and you blamed Fiyero for it. You swore the clock went by half as quick and your lectures twice as long—it didn’t help that you were so distracted in chemistry that you nearly burned your eyebrows off from a potion gone wrong. 

You’d practically thrown yourself onto your bed when you got back to your dorm, and you didn’t get up until your roommate got back and demanded to know what had gotten into you. She didn’t exactly give you the response you wanted. 

“The prince is your partner?” Coralie sighed dreamily. “Oh, you are so lucky.” 

“Lucky is not the way I’d put it,” you mumbled, words muffled by the sheets. You finally tore yourself up off your bed and picked your nightgown up from atop your dresser. You went behind your folding sheet and began to change. “And I didn’t know you had eyes for Fiyero.” 

“I hardly have eyes for him,” she said wryly. “I just have eyes—anyone can see that he’s attractive.” 

“It doesn’t matter how attractive he is if he makes me fail this midterm,” you said. You straightened your nightgown then folded your school uniform while you walked back into the open, passing a glance at your roommate as you placed it on your desk. You then settled on your bed with a huff. “I just don’t understand why Doctor Dillamond is punishing me like this. It makes me reconsider all those late nights spent grading papers for him.” 

Coralie shrugged. “You’re one of his best students, Fiyero is probably one of his worst. I bet Doctor Dillamond figured you would be happy to take him on, what with how happily you take on everything else he throws at you.” 

You grumbled as you laid back against your pillows. “I just don’t know if I can take him on. Fiyero seems to care more about flirting with every student at this school than any actual material.” 

She gave you a mischievous smile. “Maybe he’ll turn the full force of his affections on you in return for your studiousness. Oh, how that would be a sight to see.” 

“Don’t even put that idea into the air, Cora,” you scoffed. “Besides, he’s clearly involved with Galinda. Even if I was interested, which I’m not—” you emphasized with a pointed look at her— “that isn’t something I want to touch.” 

“Well, you can’t deny that he’s dreamy,” she said. “He just showed up at Shiz and people started falling left and right. It’s more impressive that you haven’t.” 

“Because I’m here for one reason,” you said. “His whole… thing doesn’t fit into any of it.” 

“I know,” Coralie mused as she fell back onto her pillows. “You’ve told me your whole plan ten times over. I just think you should also try to enjoy your life instead of bulldozing your way through it.” 

You rolled your eyes with a smile. “I’m enjoying my life just fine, thank you.” 

Interestingly enough, Fiyero was going through something similar a myriad of rooms away. 

He laid on Galinda’s bed, his head in her lap as she trailed her fingers through his hair. She’d been going on about something for the last couple of minutes, but he hadn’t really been able to focus on any of it. 

“Dearest, did you not hear what I said?” 

Fiyero blinked at the sound of Galinda’s voice. He hadn’t indeed. 

“I’m sorry, beloved.” He absentmindedly reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze once he found it. “I was thinking.” 

Elphaba laughed from across the room. She sat on her bed with a book in her lap. “That’s a first for you.” 

“It is,” Galinda said, though with much more concern laced in her voice. Her hand moved from his hair to his forehead. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Just fine,” he assured. “What was it you were saying?” 

“Just lamenting on how awful it is that we’ve been separated for this project,” she sighed. “I’m sure I could persuade Doctor Dillamond to put us in a group of three.”

“You can’t even get him to pronounce your name correctly,” Elphaba said wryly. “How could you get him to do this?” 

“Well,” Galinda huffed, “maybe you could do it. He appears to like you more than me.” 

“I’m sure that really hurts,” she said. 

Galinda placed her hand on her chest. “It does!” 

“It’s fine,” Fiyero interrupted. “I’m alright with my partner. She’s nice.” 

“Nice?” Elphaba scoffed. “I heard her lecturing you the whole time we were out in the hallway.” 

“She’s passionate,” he decided. “Besides, I don’t really care. I haven’t thought about it since she left.” 

That was a complete lie. In truth, Fiyero hadn’t been able to stop thinking about you since you left. Very strange for someone who preferred to go through life with less thinking and more doing. 

He honestly didn’t know why his mind was so occupied with you. 

He’d always been aware of you, obviously—all your professors adored you, your name was always brought up when talking about top of the class, and he was sure you held the record for most time spent in the library at once—but he didn’t know anything about you other than your academic record. And for someone with such strong opinions, especially about him, Fiyero found himself with the strange need to know more. 

He would be at the library tomorrow. Maybe not on time, but certainly there. 

Fiyero would make this the beginning of a beautiful partnership, one way or another.

-

True to your word, you were in the library bright and early after a quick stop at the dining hall. You went through the effort of gathering everything you thought you would need—a myriad of textbooks and encyclopedias, your well-weathered notebook and another one for Fiyero because you doubted he had one, and enough writing material for the two of you.

You sighed. You had to do so much just to even the ground between your groups and the others. Coralie was always so prepared whenever you worked together. 

Fiyero, to your surprise, was only ten minutes late. You already had your head buried in a book when he said your name and scared you witless. 

Your eyes widened as they darted up to look at him, and he chuckled. 

“Sorry. You were in the zone.”

“I just wasn’t expecting you,” you said. “You’re late.”

“Hardly.” Fiyero took the seat across from you, his eyes sweeping over everything you had on the table. “You’ve got quite a collection.”

“I doubt you know your way around the library,” you said. 

“I know my way around a lot of things.” 

You leveled your gaze at him. Leave it to Fiyero to make everything an innuendo. “And is a library one of them?”

“I’m sure I could make it one.”

“If you bothered to think at all.”

“Darling, you know I’d never,” he said with a smile. “Now, what are we doing here?”

“Do you really not know what our midterm is?” you marveled. 

“I have more important things to worry about,” he said. 

You scoffed and shook your head. Ridiculous— it was ridiculous that you had to put up with this. Maybe Doctor Dillamond really did hate you.

“Our assignment is an extensively researched ten page paper on any great Ozian,” you said. “Anyone who has contributed to our society in a relevant way and made our lives better for it.”

“A ten page paper?” Fiyero frowned. “That seems a bit much.”

“Between the two of us, it’s just five pages each, and we’ve got two weeks to get it done,” you said. “I’ve written five pages in a few hours of inspiration.”

“Your life truly sounds thrilling,” Fiyero said. “We could do the Wizard.”

“Half the class is going to do the wizard,” you scoffed. 

“Because he’s a great man,” he said. “There’s no shame in it.”

“There is absolutely shame in copying half the class,” you said as you pushed over a sheet of paper to him. “Now, I’ve already got a list going. Look it over; see if there’s anyone you like or anyone worthwhile you want to add.”

You looked back down at your encyclopedia, opened to your personal favorite choice, and continued scribbling down basic notes. You glanced up a few moments later to see Fiyero’s gaze hadn’t wavered from you. 

You frowned. “Is there a problem?”

“You’re awfully prepared,” he said instead. 

“I figured you wouldn’t be,” you responded.

Fiyero’s lips quirked in a smile. “Then I believe that means you deserve to choose our subject.”

Your frown deepened. “Really?”

“Are you always this suspicious of everyone?”

“Just you.”

“Then consider this an olive branch,” he said. He slid the paper back over. “Who’s your top choice?”

“…Ilara Mayfair,” you finally said as you pointed at her on the top of your list. “She was a historical linguist, responsible for half of what we know about Ozian languages and how they connect and differ. She’s…” you cleared your throat and shrugged, trying to make it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, “she’s kind of my hero.”

“Your hero?” Fiyero’s eyebrows rose. “Is that what you want to do?” 

“…It’s always been my dream,” you admitted. “I grew up helping around my parents’ bookstore and her mark was on nearly everything. I really admire it. I want to make that sort of difference in the world.”

“How noble,” he remarked. What surprised you was how genuine he sounded. “It’s impressive how much of your life you have planned out already. All Galinda knows is that she’s majoring in sorcery—she hasn’t really got anything else worked out.”

“What are you majoring in?” you asked.

“Undecided,” Fiyero said. “I was kicked out of my last school before I could declare, so I figure there’s not really a point in doing it here.”

“Not really a surprise,” you said. 

“Really?”

“On your first day, you snuck off campus with half of Shiz to go dance at Ozdust,” you said. “That’s not exactly a good first impression.” 

“I’d argue the opposite,” he said. Fiyero tilted his head, his eyes narrowing as he focused on you for a moment. His gaze made you uncomfortably aware of yourself. “I don’t recall seeing you there.” 

“That’s because I wasn’t there.” You looked back down at your encyclopedia to avoid his eyes. “I had more important things to do.” 

He frowned. “Do you ever take a day off?” 

“Of course,” you said. “There isn’t any class on the weekends.” 

“I mean with this,” he said, gesturing at all the books around you. “It doesn’t seem like you allow yourself a single moment of respite. When you’re not in class, you’re studying. When you’re not studying, you’re doing work. When you’re not doing any of it, you’re probably dreaming of your future assignments.” 

You felt your skin heat. Surely you weren’t that transparent. 

“...I don’t dream of them,” you defended. “Not— not always.” 

He laughed and shook his head. “You’re ridiculous. Do you know that?” 

You frowned. “How am I ridiculous? You’re incapable of taking a single thing seriously.” 

“And you’re incapable of not taking everything seriously,” Fiyero said. “It can’t be good for your health.” 

“I plan to get out of here a year early,” you said, looking back at your books. “I can’t slack off like you do if I want that plan to come to fruition.” 

“Oh, I’ve gotten out of every school I’ve been in a year early,” Fiyero said. “Sometimes two or three— Oz, sometimes I don’t even make it through the first semester.” 

Your eyes snapped back up to him, widened in instinctual panic. “What?” 

He burst out laughing, and it grinded every one of your gears. “Oh, I wish you could see the look on your face! It’s priceless— truly priceless!” 

“You’ve been kicked out of every school you’ve been to and you think it’s a joke?” 

Still laughing, he shrugged. “It is. Nothing bad has happened, and I’m still having the time of my life wherever I go.” 

You just shook your head as you stared at him, eyes still wide. “Are you always like this?”

“Utterly charming?” 

“Entirely insufferable.”

You didn’t understand how he laughed. Everything rolled right off him, like oil off a duck’s back, no matter how many times you insulted him. 

“You know, there are other things to life than your studies,” he said.

“Not while I’m here, there isn’t,” you said. “It’s the whole point of university.” 

“The point of university is to have fun,” he said. “You’ve seen how this place has perked up since I’ve gotten here, haven’t you?” 

“Not really, no,” you said. “I’ve been more focused on other things.” 

“Like?” 

“Like my studies.” 

“It’s like I’m talking to a broken record,” he marveled. “Have you ever had fun in your life?” His eyes widened comically. “Do you even know what the concept of fun is?” 

“Ha ha,” you said dryly. 

He tilted his head. “Do you?” 

You frowned. “Of course I do.” 

“Okay, then.” Fiyero leaned back in his chair. “Tell me about yourself.”

Your frown deepened. “We aren’t doing a research paper on me.”

“We’re working together on this,” he said. “Is it a crime to want to know my partner?”

A muscle worked in your jaw as you stared at him. He stared back, entirely unaffected. 

“If I humor you, will you actually work with me through this?”

Fiyero held up his hand. “Prince’s honor.”

Finally, you broke. You folded your arms with a short sigh then glanced away. “Fine. I’m from a tiny village in Gillikin that you’ve probably never heard of. I’m here on scholarship with the plan to graduate, become a historian, and make a name for myself.” You looked back at him. “Is that good enough for you?”

“It’s excellent,” Fiyero said with a smile. “Dare I say I’ve learned more about you in one short day than I have in the entirety of my time at Shiz?”

You gave him a fake smile as you tapped your book. “Open your textbook. We have a lot to catch up on.”

He raised his eyebrows. “You’re not going to ask about me?”

“I mean this with all due respect—what could there possibly be to know about you?” You raised an eyebrow as you counted off on your fingers. “You’re from the Vinkus, you’re a prince, and you’ve never read a book a day in your life.” 

“Oh, that’s not true,” he chastised. “I’ve read at least one—I just choose not to.” 

“Well, how about we make that two?” You reached across the table and opened his book for him. “Unless that prince’s honor isn’t worth a thing.” 

“Oh, it’s worth everything,” Fiyero said. 

You raised your eyebrows expectantly. “Then prove it.” 

“Very well,” he nodded. “I believe I can be serious for the next… fifteen minutes.” 

“You won’t even get through a chapter,” you said. “Thirty.” 

Fiyero frowned. “You set awfully high expectations.” 

“Why do you think Doctor Dillamond forced me to help you?” you asked. 

“Because you’re oh so nice and charitable?”

That got a genuine laugh out of you. If you’d been looking closer, you would have seen Fiyero’s smile grow, his eyes soften. 

“Of course. Now, go to the glossary, find Ilara, and start writing. I know practically everything about her already, so you need to catch up.”

“I don’t have—”

You held out your extra notebook and fountain pen and cocked your head. “Don’t have what?”

Fiyero chuckled as he took them from you. “You’re prepared for everything, aren’t you?”

“Always,” you said with a satisfied smile. “Now get reading, my prince.”

He pressed his hand to his chest and bowed his head. “At once, my lady.”

-

You looked at the clock on the wall. Fiyero should have been here by now. 

Granted, he was ten minutes late to your first meeting, but that was before he’d changed your expectations ever so slightly. Almost an hour had passed, and there was still no sign. 

Of course, it wasn’t as if it hindered your progress. You kind of always expected him to fall short—if he showed at all, that was a credit to him—so you already had half the outline done. But a small part of you that you’d never admit to might have actually been looking forward to his presence. 

You enjoyed the bout of verbal sparring he engaged you in. A lot of your classmates thought you were mean, and it never bothered you. Like you told Fiyero, you were here for one reason and one only, and the amount of people that liked you at university didn’t influence that at all. Your professors liked you and your grades were perfect—that was all. 

But you couldn’t lie and say it wasn’t… nice. For Fiyero to take everything you said in stride, with a smile and a retort of equal measure.

It was nice. But that was all. 

You were jarred out of your thoughts by someone calling your name. You looked up to see Fiyero sauntering over, bearing his usual smile and not much else.

“This is a library,” you said once he got closer. “You aren’t supposed to shout.”

He took the seat across from you. “I’d hardly call that shouting.”

“You aren’t meant to be loud,” you decided. “Why are you so late?”

Fiyero shrugged. “I lost track of time?”

“You know, we are partners,” you emphasized your last word, “so it would be helpful if you could try to put in the same amount of effort as me.”

“That seems impossible.” He gestured at your notebook with his head, your current page already nearly full. “You’ve got me beat on nearly everything.”

“It’s not that difficult,” you intoned. “I mean, just do some research outside of class.”

He stared at you expectantly, and you rolled your eyes. “I don’t know what I expect with you, honestly.”

“Exactly what you see, darling. Now,” Fiyero's gaze drifted over to the window, then looked back at you as he stood up, “what do you say we put a hold on things and enjoy this beautiful day?” 

Your brows furrowed. “What, you mean do our research outside?” 

“Is your work truly all you think about?” he asked in exasperation. “I mean leave the books and your notes and your stress here, and take a stroll around campus.” 

“I’ve had my entire life planned out since I was ten years old,” you said. “Of course it is. I am not going to have some— some—”

“Some what?” Fiyero interrupted. He still looked remarkably unaffected by your outburst, that sideways smile of his infuriatingly charming. 

“Some ridiculous, pompous, self-absorbed, lazy Winkie prince ruin it!” you exclaimed. 

“Lazy,” he mused. “That’s a new one.” 

“Of course you’re lazy! Why would we take a break when we have a project to do?” 

Fiyero looked at you like you were crazy— no, like he was worried about you. He shook his head. “You really do have a one track mind.” 

“When we’re in midterm season, yes, I d— what are you doing?”

Fiyero had started stacking all of the books you had on the table away from you, then he grabbed your notebook and your pen out of your hand.

“You need a break,” he said. 

“I don’t need a break, and give that back—”

You reached for your materials but only just grazed his hand before he pulled them back and set them on top of the pile. “When was the last time you saw the sun?” 

You scoffed. “I see the sun all the time.” 

“Not from a window in the library or your dorm.” 

You bit your tongue. Fiyero smiled and held out his hand. 

“You need a break.” 

You stared at his hand. He gave you a cloying look. 

“It’s not a good sign that you’re this against self-care,” he said wryly. 

You sighed and reluctantly placed your hand in his. “Fine.”

Fiyero grinned and he pulled you close. You yelped at the unexpected speed and you tumbled into his chest. Fiyero’s hand dropped to your waist, and for a moment all you could do was stare at him, wide eyed. 

“Shall we?” he murmured. 

You jolted away from him once you came back into yourself, your skin burning where he’d touched you. 

“We shall,” you said, a bit too forcefully as you started walking a bit too fast. 

Fiyero chuckled. He matched your pace easily, soon coming up beside you. “You’re already that excited?”

“Oh, shut up,” you bit out. “You’ve already gotten what you want. No need for more.”

He feigned naivety. “What would I possibly be doing?”

You shook your head with a huff. “I’m not entertaining that with a response.”

Fiyero simply hummed. You glanced over at him, still staying even with you, and then you let out another huff as you stopped. He didn’t miss a beat, pausing at the same time as you, then met your flustered expression with a smile. 

“Yes?”

“You’re the one that wanted to do this,” you said, gesturing in front of you with a hand. “So lead the way.”

“Gladly,” he said. “I’m very good at taking the lead.”

Fiyero started walking and, though you had half a mind to take the opportunity and dart back to the library, you found yourself following him. 

Cora’s words spun around your head as you and Fiyero walked together, about him turning the full force of his flirting on you in return for you being such a stickler for your midterm. 

That was the embarrassing thing; you didn’t even think this was half of it, and he already had you blushing—and for what? It was as if you’d never even talked to a boy before. 

You’d had plenty of experience back home. Village boys coming into your parents’ store to flirt at you, leaving notes in your desk in class, offering to walk you home at night—plenty of experience. 

It didn’t matter that you denied them all and never went anywhere because you had a one track mind even then, and that Fiyero had done what no one else had and gotten you take a break simply because he asked nicely—

You sucked in a sharp breath as Fiyero’s arm suddenly pressed against your chest, stopping you in place. Your head snapped up to look at him, mouth already open with questions loaded, but he gestured with his head before you could ask any of them. 

You’d nearly barreled right down the stairs from being lost in your head, without care nor consideration for actually taking the steps. 

“Mind the gap, darling,” he said. “Wouldn’t want you damaging that brain of yours.”

“…Thank you,” you said once you’d regained the ability to speak words again. “One of us ought to have one.”

Fiyero laughed as he took his arm away. “Certainly.” He used it to gesture down the stairs. “Ladies first—unless you’re unsure of your ability to conquer them.”

“I’ll be just fine, Fiyero.” You started the descent, Fiyero right behind you, and you let out another short sigh. 

There had to be something wrong with you. That was the only explanation for why you were acting this way.

Maybe you really did need to start getting more sleep. 

[l-in-the-light]

Trafalgar Law and his rare friendships (Law and closeness series part 4)

Let's venture into less explored territory. And we will start with no one else but our beloved Kinemon!

They met at Punk Hazard, Kinemon doing some rampage and Law was sent by Caesar to stop him. At first he cut him up into three pieces apparently, but I think Kin is colorizing here a lot.

Because let's take a look at his awesome feats. He might be cut into pieces, but he's still a decent threat despite that! I think Law started by cutting Kinemon in half, then got surprised he still tried to fight him, and then he cut off his head as well only to realize that even the head alone is probably bouncing around as well! So he caught it, but in the meantime the legs already run somewhere else and the torso escaped Law on his way back to lab somehow which is where Brook finds it later. And Law was probably like "screw it, I don't have time for this" and left it be for now. But I bet it wasn't "letting his torso to rot, and feed legs to wild beasts" like Kinemon claims. After all his legs turned out to be just fine lol. And we know by now that Kin's legs just run off on their own aimlessly, so this is probably what actually happened.

And this is how Strawhats find Kin. I guess Kinemon was still causing a lot of trouble despite being only a head. Maybe he tried to bite Law? Anyway, he must have been really *mad* to cut him up into that many tiny pieces. I think Kinemon was behaving like a little shit. It's important to mention Law never did that to anyone else before.

And he attempts to do the same to Tashigi who is also trying to bounce around while being cut in half.

Yeah, Kinemon and Law started off on a great note there. But I think Kin earned Law's respect for that, because this is probably what Kin shouted at him while being cut into smaller and smaller pieces:

And Law shoved his head into some closed off room, instead of giving it to Caesar. I think he was trying to spare him and hoping he can restore him back later on.

As soon as they both end up on Strawhats ship, Kinemon already treats Law with respect! It's no longer "that warlord" but "Law-dono".

It seems that despite what Kinemon says, Law actually earned his respect back there already. He even tried to catch his name or the title to know who he is.

It's so sweet he's already asking Law to give him a ride to Zou and before he can get an answer Luffy butts-in haha.

He's always listening carefully to Law's plan in Dressrosa and keeps closely with his assigned group. And yes, it's implied that Law was the one who strategically seperated the groups.

Kin is the first one to raise a concern to stick to the plan and not waste any time. He understands the stakes but won't venture off on his own, instead making sure the whole group knows what to do. That's because they left before Law finished going over the plan again. Kinemon took it on himself to make sure "they got the memo", so to speak.

Kin's also the one who seems most worried about Law, probably because when he almost rescued him he realized in what kind of terrible state he was. "Answer me!!" there is a lot of concern there he didn't show for any of the Strawhats yet, but he did for Law.

His idea to distract and cause some chaos by disguising himself was also something Law would approve of.

On Barto's ship Kin is already taking care of the dangers ahead of others, because he's aware his friends are still recoving from their injuries.

Kinemon never forgets that Strawhats and Law are in alliance and are two seperate crews. He asks Law specifically for help as well, clearly surprising him with that request. Kin's amazement seems to be very genuine and he is very polite in how he asks for help.

And then alliance happens, they bump fists together I bet Law must have braced himself for it and Luffy declares "Being in alliance means we're friends!". This is the moment Luffy defines what Kinemon and Law's relationship is supposed to be from now on: friendship. And of course Law is annoyed about that, it should be up to him to decide stuff like that! Luffy doesn't care though, pushing Law's boundaries further for him.

Law already takes on his role in the alliance, assuring Kin they will be safe in his submarine and no one will be able to suddenly attack them on his watch. Now this is a turn of 180 degrees, Law takes them as his own personal responsibility from now on, gives emotional reassurance and basically saying "count on me" but with different words. He already succumbed to the fate Luffy bestowed upon him.

And take a look at this. There is team Luffy, team Nekomamushi, Team Inuarashi and Team Kinemon. Do you know what that means? Yes, Law handed the leadership over the group to Kinemon! Meanwhile himself taking the role of a support and protection. And this trend will continue all the way in Wano as well.

Apparently he visited Kinemon at the castle ruins every single day. Most likely worried about his health condition.

Law apologized immediately to Kinemon the moment the other asks what's going on. Even takes the blame for himself, but also takes extra time to reassure Kin that his part of the plan is unaffected and no one knows about the samurais. I think it's implied again that it was Law who seperated the tasks in each group meanwhile taking a supervisor role himself. He told Kinemon to find Akazaya samurais and they had a whole operation going on in the background with gathering supplies of weapons and food, bit by bit, while officially putting the blame on some third party. Knowing Kinemon he wouldn't be smart enough to think of it this way, so Law at the very least helped him organize stuff. Besides we don't see Kinemon running around and making sure everything works out: that's Law actually, checking up with all the groups and resolving any potential crisis situations (like when he warned Sanji of trouble and took it on himself to lead the whole group to safety). Besides we have Sanji's words for proof when Law apologized to Kinemon: "What kind of shoddy operation are you running, Law?!" which is pretty direct in pointing out who the actual mastermind is behind the Wano's battle.

Seeing how Kin also wasn't the smartest at reading the coded picture message about the raid, I think it was originally Law's idea as well that the message should be some sort of code only people involved would understand. The raid picture also mentions meeting up at a port specifically, and that seems to be a reoccuring point plan in every of Law's plans ever since Rocky PORT Incident. Even in Dressrosa and Punk Hazard the chosen meeting points for all seperated groups were told to be specific ports.

When it turns out there was a traitor in the midst of their core team, it's Law who seems to have taken it on himself to dig up information from Hawkins. Interestingly enough every last samurai arrives for the raid despite that every single bridge in the country had been destroyed. I have no evidence but I think it's likely Law helped all those people travel to the "true" meeting spot. After all we didn't see him for days before the raid, and while many fans believed Law turned into a snitch, the raid itself denies it: Law was from the very beginning to the very end on the alliance's side. But then why didn't he take credit for what he did to make the raid a success? Well, he didn't take any credit at all before either, giving it all to Kinemon, so why would he start to take it for himself suddenly?

Here Law rescues the samurais, scolding them for underestimating the sea. Doesn't it look similar to you? Law is rising them up just like Oden did on his execution day. This symbolically proves Law is the actual person carrying the whole battle operation on his back. Just like his full name, Trafalgar Waterloo, should have hinted us all along. His reactions to all the others discussing what's happening are also very telling - Law's the only one not surprised that samurais aren't there yet, that there is a traitor, not even surprised that Kid is there. But he is taken aback about news of Big Mom and Jinbei, because that's some wild cards he didn't know anything about before.

Even though Law protests his submarine isn't samurais garrison, it's pretty clear who samurais themselves think runs their plan in reality. And worthy to notice here: Law no longer calls Kinemon by his full name. It's "Kin" from now on. And how many people did we ever see Law using such an affectionate name for before? With him you're either "something-ya" or a full name basis. Kin is literally the only exception. You can't see it as anything else but affectionate. Throughout Wano they became really close friends.

And of course Law saves Kinemon's skin by coming up with a backup plan on the fly and even decides he will carry the samurais to the back entrance of the island on his submarine. He also allows Kinemon to take the full credit, not really expecting any gratitude. He just sits there in the background, letting others take the spotlight.

And this is a good moment to remind us of what Sengoku told Law about love. It should be unconditional, which means you don't expect anything in return for your help. Law usually operates on "favour for a favour" basis or impersonal alliance level. But in this "alliance" he doesn't even want the credit, doesn't expect anything in return, and breaks his own rule of not calling people in affectionate ways. And does he even get anything for himself from this alliance besides the rise in his own bounty?

Imo there's only one possible conclusion here: Law accepted the condition of the alliance Luffy set up all the way back in Zou, it's supposed to be a friendship. Law indeed fullfilled that condition, he truly became friends with Kin. Of course he still wouldn't admit openly that they're friends, but like always with Law, we need to actually look at his actions and subtext. This friendship wouldn't have happened if friendship with Luffy didn't happen first! After the raid Law doesn't stay at the shogun's palace and instead stays with the ships at the port, but I bet you anything Kinemon ran to him at least once to tell him how grateful he was for his help.

So that's one confirmed friendship of Law we see in the series (besides the one he has with Luffy, but I elaborated on that one all the way back in part 2). The other friendships we can see in the series is that with Bepo, Penguin and Shachi, and Wolf in Law's novel. We know that Law created Hearts Pirates together with them, he doesn't consider Hearts to be his own creation, it's theirs as much as it's Law's. That friendship started off on a sour ground, Penguin and Shachi were bullying Bepo and Law saved him. But they quickly became friends and Law's strength and attitude earned their deepest respect. Penguin and Shachi sometimes allow themselves very cheeky comments ("Captain! You're so sexy now!"), they're also slightly older than him, but despite that they have really big respect for Law and always listen to him, despite sometimes complaining ("Captain got carried away" or "stop him Bepo!!"). They know each other well and as teens they spent a lot of late nights just talking together. They would sacrifice their lives for Law and Law would do the same for them, but he's also not beyond sending them to safety instead and taking all the risk on himself. They often shower Law in compliments, almost like they know he has low self-esteem, but then they know him for 13 years already, of course they would be best friends at this point and know that stuff about him (about his touching trauma probably as well).

Bepo is the only one privileaged with any physical affection, he is Law's safe haven, the last one he allowed himself to keep. The main Hearts also know of Law's past and his full name, as well as the fact he is a D. Of course they also started doing those silly power rangers-like poses when Law introduces his crew and I bet you anything it's a nod to Sora Warrior of the Sea. They're all fanboying the comics together. Law is probably slightly more affectionate with his Hearts than anyone else (which in this case means he allows himself to be a bit more open, but he still keeps some distance from them), but we can see he still acts like a leader for them, trying his best to earn the respect he received. But we also see him worrying about Bepo a lot in Wano when the mink ate a poisoned fish. He almost threw his own raid plan out of the window just because Bepo asked to not leave him alone; clearly they are his firstmost priority. Too bad we don't have that many of their interactions to analyze.

And then we have his friendship with the old man Wolf, inventor from North Blue, who took Law in (spoilers ahead for Law's novel!). At first their relations are mostly "favour for a favour" kind, something that Law knows well because he tends to operate on same basis. So, Law is allowed to stay at Wolf's place if he finds a job and helps with chores and testing the inventions. They take turns preparing the meals. Everything changes when Wolf has an unfortunate accident and Law saves his life. Wolf then asks for a friendship and Law thinks to himself that he can't really refuse a request from someone who doesn't usually do "friendships", he feels honoured with that trust. Wolf still acts as their mentor but it feels more like they became a family. Law is very grateful to Wolf for standing in defense of Penguin and Shachi. Wolf is also the one who teaches young Law how to be a captain and puts it into his head that he needs to take responsibility at all times. In general Wolf acts rather cold and rough, but always shows a kind heart when any of them needs it, and I bet Law took on his habits because that feels a lot like how Law himself acts on many occassions.

Wolf definitely became some sort of a rolemodel for him, but there were also few occassions when Law allowed himself to say some really spoiled and cheeky things to him (like: you do the dishes from now on). Law also helps Wolf make a tough decision: to resign from taking responsibility for his son's actions and not to kill him with his own hands, he literally stops his effort by saying "Family shouldn't kill each other". At the end Wolf gives them a partying gift: a yellow submarine, and encourages Law to go out to seas to look for freedom and experience life as he wants. Even 3 years later both of them think of each other fondly, implying that maybe one day Heart Pirates will return to share stories about their adventures.

That's all the canon provides us. Law generally keeps to himself, but in Law's novel he doesn't seem to have any problem to make friendships, every person he saves becomes eventually his friend, which really gives one more argument that there's no way Luffy would be the exception to that rule. But it becomes clear that the older Law gets the more reserved he becomes and doesn't seek out friendships. He probably wouldn't have perceived Kinemon as his friend if not for the condition of the alliance Luffy applied. And this begs to ask about the elephant in the room: why? Why is he that reserved and why did he allow himself to accept Kinemon as friend in the end? I think he felt it's okay to become friends with Kinemon, because he's a samurai thrugh and through. Even if they win and Kin lives, Law would leave Wano and probably never see him again. I guess that made the decision easier on him to some degree.

I have some ideas about possible reasons why Law avoids any new friendships or affectionate bonds with people and instead tries as much as he can to keep it impersonal. He clearly can be a caring and dedicated friend and I don't think his trauma is the only reason why he avoids people. Because there's no reason anymore (after defeating Doffy and Kaido) to not openly admit he made new friends. I will take a closer look at his possible reasons in the next post.

[oddeyes588]

gOD I'm eating so well today... we're finally getting some good characterization for Ruri and Rin... hell, it's incredible that we're getting some characterization for them AT ALL. I'm gonna ramble about it.

Ruri. Oh Ruri... it's genuinely so funny seeing her complete contrast with Yuto and Shun, who have all the dark and broodiness that comes with being characters who've been sharpened by the harsh edges of war. Yuto is in a bit of a middle-ground compared to Shun, but Ruri sits on the complete opposite end of the spectrum to her brother.

She's very chill and sweet, in stark contrast to Shun's tendency for rage and violence. Hell, she's the only one of the Xyz Trio who ISN'T glaring constant daggers at Dennis. She's sympathetic, and this goes in line with what we already knew about her. Having received the same teachings from Yusho as Yuya, she's pacifistic and hates the violent dueling that destroyed her home, as it's not what dueling is meant to be.

While Yuto and Shun get understandably hardened in order to do what is necessary to survive, Ruri doesn't want to lose what she loved about her home, and as such tries to maintain it. It's not like she let everything that happened slide off her back, she still has fear for Academia, but she's readily sympathetic, and it's honestly very sweet to see. While Yuto and Shun are still trying to adjust into the process of healing, Ruri is ready to dive in headfirst, because that's exactly what she was waiting for the whole time.

Basically, for having seen the Horrors of War, Ruri is handling herself remarkably well.

And at last... Rin. Rin is hilarious in a few ways, but to start with a more serious note...

It truly does speak to how good of a place Heartland was versus how shit of a place the City was from the get-go, because out of the two, Rin is somehow the more traumatized one? Not that anyone can blame her, since she grew up in a Capitalist Dystopia where you can be arrested and sent to a "correctional facility" indefinitely for the crime of, uh, trespassing on the property of the rich. Oh, and at the age of 14, too! Rin is often scared and fully ready to choose violence over it. Honestly, the idea that Rin's automatic reaction to somebody lunging out at her is to drive her knee into their stomach makes way too much sense... and it really speaks as to how little brain cells Yugo has that he doesn't learn his lesson, and keeps trying to hug her out of nowhere.

But with that said... god I love Rin, actually. Despite Yugo's inability to learn why you don't suddenly glomp somebody, she's got exactly the amount of "he's an idiot, but he's MY idiot" energy that we expected... by which I mean she has an ABSURD amount of that energy. She cares about Yugo just as much as he cares about her, though she shows it via the very hilarious method of affectionately dragging him at every opportunity.

And it's actually so great. I love her. Anyways! It's also neat to see how her overall focus is actually on a much smaller scale compared to everyone else. Yuzu has—or rather, had—obviously she asks about her home, asks how the Synchro Dimension is doing... and she's happy to hear that it's finally on the right track. But while the other three girls are somewhat vested in the fate of the universe(s), the state of their home, etc... Rin seems to focus a lot harder on the fact that she missed the Friendship Cup on account of being kidnapped at the time.

And while yes, there's a hint of tragedy to that considering that the losers of that particular tournament are all sent to an underground work facility to be worked until they die...

...her being lowkey SUPER competitive is a delight.

[shiraishi-kanade]

AWAKE NOW: an (almost) line by line analysis by yours truly, pt.1

If you've been following me at all, you probably know that Awake Now is my favourite An Shiraishi commission and that I always ramble how symbolic and incredible its lyrics are, among other things. Well, it's time for me to actually explain why I think it's so great!

This is part one tackling only in-game version; I'll later make an addition to this post expanding on the full version lyrics, because there is also a lot to unpack there and I don't want to do all what work in one sitting. Sorry.

[Disclaimer: for a quite a long time, the commonly accepted translation of this song has been facing criticism, and quite a lot of lines have been changed into what I believe is more accurate later. More corrections may be yet to come, but this post will use the translation available at 27.10 by Hiraethie, with edits by Violet and 25239x.]

Lazy Rainy My Soul is

now in a bad mood

From this new feeling called Lament

(New feeling called Lament)

The first verse of the song is referencing An's growing unease she experiences during the time of Bout to be Beside you; while she doesn't know why she feels that way at the beginning, a big emphasis is made on how she never felt that way before, because even having a partner is something that is a new experience for An.

The supposed relationship full of perfection

got complicated on its way

This line references the way An perceives her own and Kohane's partnership, as well as just their general dynamic: they started off strong but already faced some conflict during Singing in Sync, the very first event of VBS, during which An had to confront her overprotectiveness; now this relationship is starting to get even more complicated with An's anxiety and "hazy feelings" thrown into the mix.

Not only that, it's also important that this line went to Touya - who went through his own issues in his relationship with Akito.

Still staying passionate, I Try

A general callback to An's attitude to losing and having roadblocks:

🎧: I hate to lose, but I usually take a more positive approach to think and work harder to do better next time.

(btby episode 4, official tl)

As well as, in this particular situation, she only sees one way to get over her feelings: to stay passionate and keep singing. This line is later brought up again in Rekka with "My silence and passion, I kept them inside my heart" line.

It's not like you're the one at fault

This is An's admitting that Kohane is never at fault for making An feel the way she does; that she has the full right and ability to make progress and keep improving as much as she wants to, and An could never blame her for it. At the same time, An is bitter at herself for having these feelings at all, which we later see in WTWG.

Trip Step, I want to do that again and again

If we could light up the night together

For eternity, then...

An wants to be Kohane's partner and keep singing with her despite the anxiety she brought into her life. If we look at the phrase "light up the night" to mean performing and bringing excitement to people (which it very well could be, seeing the overall symbolism of fire and light has in VBS's story), it becomes apparent this refers to An wanting to stay partners with Kohane forever, especially considering these lines in the event itself:

👤: Have you found a good partner yet, An?

🎧: No, not yet... It's taking longer than I expected...

🎧: But I have a feeling that we're gonna be singing together forever once I do!

***

🎧: That she's [Kohane] the only one who can be my partner...

(same event, chapter 5)

An is willing to go to extreme length to keep being Kohane's partner - so they can "light up the night" together.

Falling in love with the sound of my wings

that I outstretched to the skies,

This line goes to Kohane as well as Touya, but refers primarily to Kohane's discovering her own talent and (rightfully) enjoying all the new experiences and emotions it has brought into her life. It's also a clever play on Kohane's name, seeing as if she had a kanji spelling instead of hiragana, it most definitely would have included the character 羽 - "wing" or "feather". This same wordplay is then later used in Hollow:

預かる背中のその羽が

azukaru senaka no sono hane ga

This is confirmed by the song's producer and the very same character is used in Awake Now, so it's very unlikely it's just a coincidence - at the same time, "outstretching her wings" definitely refers to Kohane gaining new abilities and exploring new opportunities with Taiga.

the flowers of my dreams start overflowing.

I’ll make them sublimely

beautifully bloom so,

Seemingly, An has gotten everything she's ever wanted: she found a partner and a team, and townfolk are starting to take her dream more seriously - but her feelings about Kohane are overwhelming and distracting her from that, even during practice. Even so, An is determined to make that relationship work.

The first line here also went to Kohane and Touya, likely reflecting how their dream was found somewhere later than An and Akito's was, so that development is even more spontaneous to them than to the first two.

don’t forget that I’m right next to you, okay?

This is both reassurance to Kohane that An will always be by her side and believing in her, and a plea by An for Kohane not to forget her as she keeps growing and moving forward, and for Kohane to keep An by her side. It's a very nice double edged sword of a line and probably one of my favourite ones in the entire song.

Also, it also has Akito in the background, which is just... *Gestures at Stray Bad Dog event*. And this moment in BTBY too:

🥞: She's having an effect on the rest of us, including me, which means you, her partner, probably have it worse...

🥞: You feel like you're getting left behind... Like I did a while ago...

Akito went through something very similar, though not identical - that's likely the reason he was able to notice An's worries and help her in the first place.

Even if our touching backs begin to separate

Kohane is starting to pursue training with Taiga outside of An's reach, and An is starting to bottle up her feelings about Kohane - they're no longer as emotionally close as they used to be, and that's okay. Might also refer to the difference in skill level that is not there yet but will become quite apparent soon: their touching backs begin to separate... Perhaps even going in different directions.

Awake Now

The name drop and the meaning behind the song title: An is now aware of the feelings she experienced back in Awakening Beat and the true reason behind it, as unpleasant as it may be.

This doesn't end with my longing alone

This is perhaps one of the most interesting lines in the song, as it's the one that has faced the most misinterpretation, previously being translated as "I will never stop yearning for you."

Nevertheless, a corrected translation makes a lot more sense. An refuses to be the only one "yearning" in her and Kohane's relationship; she wants to keep inspiring Kohane and make her go even further, for Kohane to keep yearning for An and her singing, too.

🎤: Since you want to be someone she can “respect and be proud of”, An, you want her to like and be excited by the way you sing.

(same event, chapter 6)

This later comes back as a major theme in WTWG:

🎧: (But you know what, Kohane?)

🎧: (I'm not satisfied with that.)

🎧: (I want to drag it out of you, too.)

🎧: (This new power of yours, all sorts of feelings you've never felt before, all of it, all of it!)

🎧: (I want to drag it out of you, with my song!)

(WTWG, chapter 7, tl by Lozy Bug on YouTube)

...and more throughout the same chapter. In other words, while Kohane's singing make An experience new feelings and emotions, An doesn't want to be the only one of the two this happens to - so... She starts working towards doing it right back at her. But in BTBY, this specifically refers to the "I want to keep singing with you forever" feeling, too.

In other words, even the game version of Awake Now is basically An's Shiraishi character arc condensed into one song; it breaks down the point of conflict in BTBY down to it's bare essentials, and expands on motives that will later come back in play over a year later - and that is why I consider this song to be the best An Shiraishi comm.

And we haven't even gotten to the full version.

[dragonnon]

OKAY HI, JUST BEAT THE UNSPEAKABLE ADVENTURE AND BY PROXY DGS1. I HAVE SOME THOUGHTS. QUITE A FEW ACTUALLY.

Starting from the ending sequences. if you want to see my entire experience through he game just look through the live blog tag on my blog! ^^

I thought that scene was gonna be Ryunosuke and Van Zieks dueling in the courtroom, (brain want samurai fight. in fact I wanted to see a duel between Kazuma and van zieks since the 3rd case lmao) but I was pleasantly surprised. We got hints at his back story! I've been waiting the entire game for his backstory so I'm deeply satisfied. I mean I think van zieks is the prosecutor for dgs2 as well, because I never see anyone talk about a different prosecutor for dgs2 so I'm just assuming it's van zieks again.

Ryunosukes belief that no matter who you are, we can all relate to each other because we're all humans who experience human emotions is one that deeply resonates with me, and it means a lot to see it in this game, I think ryunosuke's my favorite character, he overall just means A LOT to me.

Then, with Gina, the way she was trying to be nonchalant about it all but was actually holding back tears the entire time was so cute, man. And her crying sprite reveal got me just as hard if not harder than Athena's did, like gosh, my tearducts were WORKING through the entire ending of this game.

AND RYUNOSUKE WONDERING IF HE MADE IT UP TO KAZUMA'S EXPECTATIONS BROKE ME LIKE LITERALLY. i like to make jokes that ryunosuke keeps hallucinating Kazuma, (even in the musical) but it breaks my heart every time deep down inside. Crazy how this game makes me think and feel exactly how his is. It's like I share his same grief to some extent.

(And Iris with her good news and bad news thing was really funny to me, cause I've been thinking about that for basically my entire life. personally me, I'm with ryunosuke, the good news cancels out the bad news. That along with sholmes' bit with constantly being ignored when he thinks he should've been noticed never gets old. Ever. Sholmes is king.)

Let me tell you, at the boat scene I could barely contain myself from screaming, I was so happy to see susato again and finally knowing why she was calling herself a failure all the time, despite being a actual freaking legend. ryunosuke telling her she's the BEST JUDICIAL ASSISTANT in the world was 100% deserved. She's a LEGEND. She planned ALL of that. ALL of it. And she's so humble about it too.

oh and the whole thing with the Morse code actually had me running laps around my living room, (it was 3:00AM 💀) WHAT BUSINESS DOES KAZUMA, GREGSON, AND IRIS'S DAD'S NAME HAVE BEING IN THERE. When it first dawned on me that it spelt out asogi i went absolutely feral, y'all should've seen me lmao, I was crouched on the floor in shock. if you ask me, it's gotta be a hit list right? 2 outta four people on that list are literally dead. (GREGSON WATCH YOUR SIX 😭) Wait, now that I'm thinking about it, maybe there's actually more to Kazuma's death than I thought? Gonna find out next game.

And I almost cried during the fully animated cutscene (AACJ reference lol) I miss susato already, AGAIN.

That ending sequence felt like it lasted a millennium, but once it was over it felt like it was all too soon.

I was so happy too see everyone in the character send offs. This game is really good at making me attached to absolutely every single character. Skullkin bruvvers, (& graydon) I love y'all, I hope y'all have a good time in prison, and I hope you get out the slammer soon Gina. And seeing hosonaga and soseki for what might be the last time was great, I've been missing those two.

DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE LAST END CREDITS PART. Kazuma and ryunosuke going on a stroll for a while, and Kazuma abruptly stops walking, ... I think from the text matter of this here post you can hypothesize what my reaction might've been. TEARS. Me and my siblings were screaming 😭

And then the part where the whole crew eventually groups together, I SCREAMED FOR EACH ADDITION. Look at the fuckkingggg.... SQUAD. and the ryunosuke and sholmes pose at the end there was the perfect way to end the ever. EVER... 👺👺

I'm looking so forward to playing DGS2 to see what's gonna happen next, I gotta know the van zieks lore and who the hell traumatized him that bad hat his face is permanently reminiscent of a depressed cat, and the Morse code lore, and if susato comes back sooner rather than later, and what she know about the hound of the Baskervilles!!

IM SO EXCITED. THIS IS MY FAVORITE ACE ATTORNEY GAME EVER. EVERRR!!!!

ACE ATTORNEY SERIES IS A GEODE AND GREAT ACE ATTORNEY IS THE BEAUTIFUL GEMSTONES INSIDE OF IT.

Definitely in my top three (as seen below.)

1. TGAA

2. SOJ

3. AJAA

TYSM FOR READING BYEEEEEEEEE!!!

[soarelesiluna-ao3]

Heyy, could U write smt Jakob (kaj) x reader pliss?

Oh no way, a Kaj related ask! I love these guys! My favorite guy is Axel btw 🥰

Of course I can write smth abt our beloved golden retriever Schakob 💙 he's so lovable!! I get why he sweeps everyone off their feet so easy hehe

Here's my first attempt - how about a cute date with Jakob? I hope you like it and I'm not letting you down!

Content under the cut!!

"Oh, you're here already!"

Jakob smiles at you when he sees you come his way. He's beaming, as usual, just like he was when he asked you out. His eyes look at you from head to toe, you can tell, and somehow his smile widens once he's done.

"You look fantastic! Ah, by the way, thanks for coming with me... We're leaving for Basel tomorrow and I was kinda scared I wouldn't be able to see you one last time."

Kaj were getting progressively busy as a group, ever since they won Melodifestivalen, it was all interviews, rehearsals, Pre-parties, shows... They were understandably tired but always showed smiles on their faces. Probably it was because they were all too used to this hectic lifestyle, but also it was because they loved what they did so much. Still, Jakob remained kind, cheerful and healthy, as usual. Nothing could change your feelings towards him.

He offers you an arm, so you can hook onto it.

"Shall we go, then?"

When you nod as a reply, the both of you start walking the streets of Stockholm. It was a place you didn't know that well, but you didn't mind getting lost, because you knew Jakob would be there for you anyway. And the thought is comforting. To have someone to love so much that getting lost in a foreign city doesn't even sound half bad.

"Is there anything in particular you'd like to do?" Is the first question out of his mouth. "I mean, I know we planned for a date but we kind of never really decided what to do, right?"

That was true - you just set a time and place and agreed upon it. After some thought, you describe what your perfect date would look like. The entire time, Jakob is looking at you, eyes wide and fixed on you. He's focused on your words, so as not to miss any detail.

"Oh wow, that sounds like a plan", he nods in agreement. "But I also want to add my part. I saw there's a cafe that opened downtown, and they got great reviews for pastries and hot chocolate. If you want, we can go get some."

The idea doesn't seem half bad, so you agree. He sounds so happy, so enthusiastic.

"It's because I'm with you! I feel extra recharged. And I want to make sure you're as happy as I am to have you here, with me."

Jakob leans in and kisses your cheek for a moment. Then he grabs your hand and puts it to his lips, to kiss your knuckles as well. Small gestures, but you can tell they mean a lot to him.

"Now, let's go make some more memories before tomorrow, yes? I want to take as many as I can with me... And more when you're in them."

Despite his words, you can tell there's a hint of shyness behind them. He's good with words, but somehow still seems nervous to mess up. It's adorable.

And it'll be more adorable when you surprise him in Basel, you think. He has no clue you're going to rehearsal with him, and you are sure he'd love to see you again.

Just like you love seeing him now.

[the-sol-eater]

Ranking all of the Milgram Birthday Outfits on a scale of 1/10 because it's 3AM over here and I have to do school things at 6 (Inspired by this video) ↓

Already off to an incredibly strong start, because as we know, Haruka is perfect and can do no wrong. Dog? Little sister? Who's that? Sounds like a myth honesty. Alright, jokes and Haruka bias aside, very nice ! Relatively plain all things considered, but that's quite fitting for Haruka (I mean, have you seen how this kid dresses normally? I'm somewhat surprised that he didn't go for a full white look. Wonder if Muu helped him out when choosing his pieces) I also love the color blue, so bonus points for that. (shut up I know I just said I would ignore biases) Overall, I give Haruka Sakurai a 8/10 !! Lookin' good, buddy ! ↓

Yuno looks so pretty and the outfit is SO cute !! I love the frilliness of the shirt, the pleated skirt is really cute and in general I love the shades of pink chosen for this outfit, and those SHOEEEES girl where did you get those give me name and address. I honestly have no complaints at all I give Yuno Kashiki a 10/10 !! Absolutely gorgeous girl !! (Also it's unfortunate we're only ranking the outfits and not the cakes, because the decision to give Yuno a fucking staircase cake was genius) ↓

...Mannn, I wish I could say I liked this outfit so badly. The outfit itself is alright, if a bit basic, and Fuuta looks very handsome ! But I can't help but feel like black would've been a better choice for him than dark brown. And Fuuta...my guy...WHY those shoes? I could've maybe forgiven the outfit colors if you didn't decide to pair them with shiny gold...sneakers? What the hell even are those? Get better shoes, man. Overall, I'm giving Fuuta Kajiyama a 4/10. I like the outfit it'self (minus the shoes), but the coloring brings it down a lot for me. ↓

Christ, no wonder Muu got model deals ! Look at this queen right here !! She looks absolutely gorgeous, the dress is beautiful and I love the Beauty And The Beast inspiration. The earrings being inspired by an hourglass is a very cool detail, and the heels look great as well ! I genuinely don't think I have any faults with this one Muu Kusunoki gets a 10/10 ! Nice job dressing to impress ! ↓

One chance Mr. Kirisaki, one cha-- Ahem. As I was saying, Shidou looks amazing in this outfit !! I'm usually not a fan of there being so much white on it's own (I sound like a certain horror fanatic, sheesh.) But Shidou reallly rocks it, and the purple accents are very nice in comparison !! I also really like the shoes for some reason. Shidou is being added to the list also consisting of Muu and Yuno where I need to see who their shoemaker is For Shidou Kirisaki, I give a 9/10 !! Very pretty man. ↓

Mahiru looks very pretty here ! I love the poofy hair accessory, and the birdcage earrings are a very nice touch. That being said however...the dress is a bit too plain for me. I cannot help but feel like something is missing here that would make the overall outfit look way better. A sash maybe? Despite that though, Mahiru Shiina gets a 6/10 !! Looking ready for a date !  ↓

Ooooh...Kazui stans forgive me, but I'm pretty indifferent to this outfit. It's not bad mind you ! Kazui looks very handsome in it, and I like the blue chosen for his tie. But it's the same problem with Mahiru where I feel like it's a bit too plain and could've used something more, like a pattern on his vest or pants. Also though his shoes aren't the atrocity that is Fuuta's, I feel like a black or even a dark blue akin to Haruka would've looked a lot better in comparison to the rest of his outfit. Kazui Mukuhara is granted a 5/10. Not the best, not the worst. Sorry old man. ↓

AHHH SHE LOOKS SO CUTE !! It's like if the frilliness from Yuno's outfit was upped to twenty ! Amane's dress is adorable and looks very comfortable as well, I want a bigger sized version for myself. I also really like her big bow, as well as the blue shoes. But most importantly, Amane seems to be genuinely happy wearing it, and as a fandom, Amane's happienss takes priority. Amane Momose, you'll be getting a 9/10 from me ! Good on ya, kid ! ↓

Ahhh, he's so cute ! Look at how polite he looks ! The blazer is nice, and also blue. Blue bias. And the boots absolutely fucking SLAY. The way his hair is styled looks very nice as well ! I also think this is the closest we have gotten to official art of Mikoto smiling genuinely, and I personally think we need more. And more. And more. Mikoto Kayano gets a 10/10 !! Very cute boy ! ↓

Ma'am, I politely and respectfully ask you to break my neck mercilessly-- Ahem. As I was saying. KOTOKO LOOKS FUCKING AMAZING !! The undershirt oh my god the FUCKING UNDERSHIRT !! Absolutely adore it so much. The colors are all very pleasing to the eye, the skirt is very cute, and the heels look cool as hell !! But Kotoko also looks cool as hell in anything, so is this really fair? Kotoko Yuzuriha has obtained a 10/10 ! Absolutely gorgeous.

[privatehousesanatomy]

hi this is a very controversial topic in the house md fandom i feel like and i'm going to speak on it. feel free to agree or disagree in the comments and reblogs, but truthfully i don't think anything you can say can or will change my view point.

that being said - house was never the "bad guy". is he a great guy? absolutely not. he's deeply flawed and i can understand why a lot of people hate him. it's hard to like somebody when all you're seeing is what's on the surface. he's cold, abrasive, mean, and an entire list of other words i could use to describe house but that's not the point of this post.

i can guarantee that there is not a single person on this planet that could go through even a quarter of the shit that house has gone through and still say that they're not miserable. you cannot expect someone to go through hell and not come out of it a changed person, and you cannot get upset with a person who's gone through hell and is bitter because of it.

let's start with his childhood. it's always been kinda up in the air just how abusive house's father was - the only real instances we were ever given detailing the abuse was ice baths, being made to sleep in the yard, and being given the silent treatment, which are all absolutely horrible things to do to child, however his childhood wasn't something that was ever touched on a whole lot. house even admits that there were good times, and a lot of people overlook that fact. a lot of y'all aren't willing to accept that people can have good memories of their abusers - that's how they become abusers in the first place. especially in terms of abusive relationships - there had to be good memories before the bad ones could be made. we don't know how john house was in terms of how he spoke about his son to other people. he could have described his son as his pride and joy to the general public but behind closed doors shamed house for not being more like him. having a tainted relationship with a parental figure is damaging and it's really no wonder why house grew up with such a skewed perspective on the concept of unconditional love.

chronic pain is a whole other issue. he was forced into a medical procedure against his will and regardless of whether or not it saved his life, it was still a direct violation of his bodily autonomy and to make it worse, the person that did it to him ending up abandoning him when he became too much of a burden. chronic pain is already hard enough to deal with. i deal with it myself and i completely understand why house gets the way he gets when he's in pain. to the rest of the world, they watch him function and think that the pain can't be that bad, and it's the same shit i experience in my own daily life. the pain is incredibly overstimulating at times and despite how good we might be at pretending that it's not, we're suffering inside.

another thing that doesn't help is how many people remind house on a daily basis how horrible he is and how they're worse off for knowing him. do you honestly expect him to start acting like everything is all sunshine and rainbows when people are practically telling him he's better off dead? that the world would be a better place if he wasn't in it? he is the way he is because everything in his life has proven to him that for some god forsaken reason, the universe is working against him and the only way for it to not hurt him is for him to become an isolated, antisocial individual. can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in, right?

while i'm here, i'm also going to touch on instances in the show that he gets blamed for. amber's death and chase getting stabbed were not his fault. everyone wants to sit here and blame him but there's no blame to put on him. with amber, he specifically called looking for wilson. he told amber to find wilson and send him. amber came anyway. it wasn't her fault either. it was no one's fault but the guy that drove into the bus. house risked his life to try and save amber's, and yeah she died but it wasn't his fault.

and with chase getting stabbed, that wasn't house's fault either. house might have taken the blame for it because if the blame has to be pinned on someone, might as well be him, right? but you can't blame him for either situation.

idk maybe im yapping too much and maybe none of this makes sense but it makes sense to me

[acourtofthought]

*HOFAS SPOILERS* I'd love to know your thoughts on the Books A Million bonus chapter from HOFAS. I'm a Nessian lover, but the discourse I've seen so far has so many readers hating on Cassian and suggesting this is the start of the end of their relationship. And while I understand why he'd be so angry with her actions, and was disappointed he didn't stand up for her a smidge more than he did, I don't think it's an indication that SJM is about to drop a bomb and set her up with Eris instead (which is what I see a lot of the anti-Cassian crowd saying).

I'll start off by saying SJM is definitely not going to be ending Nessian and I can't believe people are still on about couples not ending up together after they've already been given their main arc / POV. SJM herself said it in an interview that she didn't want everything to be perfect by the end of Nesta's story, that there was still going to be things for her to deal with, consequences to her saving Feyre and she still had a future journey. Just because she's not getting a main POV, she'll still be involved in future books so I do think we're seeing Nesta as she continues finding her way. I imagine that Cassian will eventually tell Nesta he's proud of her for wanting to help Bryce but when the fear was still too close to the surface after finding out what she did, I think everyone's reaction was kind of warranted? Nesta is great for wanting to help Bryce....but it was kind of at the expense of their world. Their world that has Nyx and Feyre and Elain and Gwyn and Emorie Cassian, and humans, the rest of the fae and so on. She wasn't even sure she could trust Bryce, told her as much, yet she still sent her off with one of the deadliest weapons around that if by ending up in the the wrong hands it could mean the destruction of their world. A world that Rhys and Cassian have been trying to protect for 500 years and Nesta really took a gamble on the lives of everyone she knows. It was a caring thing for her to do, thinking about helping another world, while not really showing the same concern for her own and I think that's got to be difficult for the members of the IC to handle when their focus has always been on trying to keep their people safe. I do think the Mask is going to come into play later in the series. Nesta hands Bryce the mask and Bryce thinks, "she could have sworn the very world - all worlds - shuddered as Nesta's hand crossed into Midgard and passed the Mask to Bryce. We have Hunt don the Mask (able to as Bryce imbued him with some of her "made" essence) and he says "The Mask ripped apart his soul." We have Nesta wear the mask when Bryce first came to Prythian and Az had a difficult time getting her to relinquish it's hold on her despite her later bold claims that the Mask obeys her. Helion shudders over the Mask, claiming that his ancestor may have worn it and the cost is now imprinted on his blood. And in SF, we have SJM mention that Nesta only needed to call a few of the dead with the Mask, not thousands "not yet". So I think the argument itself is also setting up for some bigger arc we'll see in the future for this particular weapon. Maybe something that will happen in the extra books she was recently contracted for. But I do think maybe Nesta has gotten a little too confident on thinking she's truly the one in control of this very dark made object.

[tamsiblings]

i also. [deep sigh] like i know this is in many ways simply me being overprotective of a character i really love. y'know, like a normal person, lmao. but i sometimes feel like the fandom at large (i know, i know, caveat that i am hurting my own feelings by looking other platforms, lmao) do not make room for there to be a lot of nuance wrt simon, including in the fact that i think simon feels. pretty complicated about serenity as their home tbh! and that there are entirely understandable reasons for that!

like, when they first came onboard, and up to safe, simon did not think much of the ship, and in a truly dense move, insulted serenity in front of kaylee lol. but by ariel, he was referring to serenity as home, and while you could argue he was saying that for river's sake (which i DO think is how he meant it), it also came out so naturally as to be a little slip that betrays how he feels about it. simon is not a ship buff, and yeah, he doesn't have the connection to it that kaylee or others do, but he doesn't Hate the ship at this point. he feels safe there, and more importantly, he feels river is safe there. and 'home' is about the people just as much as the ship - he may not get along with everyone all the time, but he does care about them (and that only would have grown as the show went on.)

when he explains he thinks it's more home to river than anywhere, kaylee asks after him - and it is genuinely sweet. as much i think she also wants to feel like simon cares about her specifically (which he does, and which is what the conversation does become about at the end), she asks "what about you?" because she wants him to feel at home for his own sake. but that's complicated, because again - simon was... forced out isn't really the right word. like he did Choose to leave and save river. but it was, again, a choice made under duress. it's the same as it would have been if at the end, with a gun pointed at simon's head, river really did 'choose' to go with early. it would be a choice made under duress, because someone she loved was in danger. simon's choice to leave osiris was likewise a choice made under duress, and i think that makes it much more difficult to fully embrace his new life. and as caring as kaylee is, and as well as she means here, i think it's difficult for her to understand his perspective. we actually SEE the choice she makes to leave her home planet back in out of gas. it's an exciting moment for her! it's a chance to work on a real ship, to work with machines, to travel off her home planet. it's an exciting adventure! which is great!

but it just... was not like that for simon. leaving home to save river and boarding serenity was a set of lowkey pretty traumatic circumstances, i maintain. so it's easy to say, sometimes somewhat callously, (not that this is what kaylee's doing, but i do get the sense that this is the broader fandom mindset) "okay, but this is your life now, so make the most of it". and like, on the one hand, yeah! i do think that mindset would ultimately be healthier and serve him well - but it also makes sense that he's not there yet. we're seeing him in, what, the first year after leaving home under those circumstances? that doesn't happen overnight.

and the other thing is that i DO think despite himself simon already sees serenity as home to some degree... but now they might have to leave. when kaylee asks him 'what about you?' and simon responds that he thought the hospital was home... yeah, and he had to leave it. and now he might have to leave here. you'll notice he never actually says he doesn't consider the ship home or that he hates being there. i'm not saying he absolutely loves it onboard, i think he finds many things about it frustrating, but he feels he and river are safe there, and that means a lot to anyone, and to simon especially who clearly really values stability and has just sorta maybe started to find it on serenity. but he acknowledges it he doesn't even know if the captain will let them stay, and in therefore, what's the point now in admitting any attachment (to the ship, to kaylee, to the crew) when more than likely it will end in hurt.

[lythea-creation]

Caught on Camera - Shams x fem reader (Chapter 4)

Chapter 1

Previous Chapter

warnings: none

word count: 833

-----------------------

“Hey (f/n)! Do you have any plans for tonight?”, Nadeen asked me on our way to class.

“No, why? You wanna hang out?”, I assumed.

“Kind of. I'm going to Omar's birthday party and you have to come along”, she requested.

“Omar as in Tasneem's boyfriend and Shams' brother Omar?”, I reassured.

“Exactly! He's actually pretty cool and some others from our class are gonna be there. But I'd just feel so much better if you were coming too” she proposed.

“I dunno, Nadeen. It's probably gonna end up in drama. And I don't really get along with Shams”, I considered.

“I thought you two had made up”, she recalled.

“Yeah, kinda. That doesn't mean we like each other all of a sudden”, I pointed out.

“Come on! We never really go out. It could be fun”, she tried persuading me further.

“Fine”, I agreed with a sigh.

“Yes”, she rejoiced. “Want me to pick you up?”

“Definitely. There's no chance I coming there alone. I'm not even invited”, I reminded her.

“Well. I invited you. I bet Omar won't mind”, she supposed.

“Whatever”, I brushed it off. “Wait! What am I gonna wear?”

I groaned.

“I'm sure you're gonna find something”, Nadeen encouraged me.

We had finally arrived in class and moved to our seats.

It did not take long until Miss Abeer started the class.

“Good morning, girls! Today you're going to do a partner project”, she announced.

Suddenly everyone began mumbling, deciding who was going to work together. Nadeen and I sent each other a glance as a sign to work together as well.

“Quiet”, Miss Abeer demanded. “You're not getting to pick your partner this time. Each of you is going to take one piece of paper. Then you need to find the matching number on it. And no switching or you're going to fail immediately.”

Instead of mumbling there were several groans resounding in the classroom now.

Reluctantly I picked a piece of paper and opened it up.

Everyone was already looking for their partner, some showing the number on their paper with their fingers.

It felt like my own fate was challenging me when I realized that I had ended up with Shams. Seriously! Was my life a freaking drama show or what?

“Guess we're stuck together once again”, I declared to her.

“Seems like it”, she shot back, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

For a second I considered talking about the birthday party with her, but decided against it. She would find out soon enough that I was coming as well.

I settled down at Shams desk and read the task.

Despite my initial reluctance I had to admit that I could have gotten way worse partners than Shams. She was working diligently and always asking for my opinion.

Yet we did not manage to finish on time.

“Guess we'll have to meet up then”, she suggested. “Wanna come over to my place this weekend? Can't today though.”

Of course she could not invite me over on her brothers birthday. She just did not know that I knew.

“Sure”, I agreed. “Just text or call me when you have time.”

I wrote my number down and handed it to her.

“I will”, she remarked.

“What is it with you and Shams that you always end up together?”, Nadeen wondered when we were eating lunch.

“I wish I knew”, I mumbled.

“How was working with her?”

“Actually great”, I confessed. “It didn't even feel like work to be honest. More like a fun research project together.”

“So Shams isn't that bad after all?”, Nadeen challenged me.

Her raised brow and the smirk she was wearing were giving me the urge to defend myself. But I could not. There was nothing I could resonate with.

“Yeah, maybe”, I admitted. “I don't even know why I want to hate her so much.”

“Ever considered that you actually like her?”, Nadeen proposed.

“What? How does that even make any sense?”, I shot back.

“Fear of rejection? Shams doesn't come along with a lot of people because she's so different. And she won't change herself to fit in. Maybe you're scared she won't accept you if you committed to it”, she resonated.

“That's ...” I wanted to say ridiculous, but that would be unreasonable. “Actually a likely possibility”, I realized defeated.

“I didn't mean to reflect myself on such a deep level, Nadeen”, I whined, which earned me a laugh from her side.

“Does it change anything though?”, she wondered.

“I dunno”, I stated.

“You could try and talk to her at the party”, Nadeen suggested.

“Thanks for making me even more anxious about coming”, I replied sarcastically.

“You're welcome”, she teased me. “Can't wait to see what you'll do.”

----------------------

Next Chapter

Since I'm so grateful to have yall as my readers, I decided to upload this chapter today as well. I hope you all like it.

Tag List: @sunwoniie

[the-fiction-will-knit-the-real]

Trying very hard to not be upset with myself for only being able to put limited effort into a job search due to taking care of my health. It can be hard though. Would appreciate any positive thoughts or advice, though this is mostly just a thought dump and I do have a general path forward

And it's not like I'm doing nothing at all, but of course it doesn't matter to most people how much effort I put in, it's never enough unless I'm getting offers. Even the month back in the summer where I put in over 500 applications, it "wasn't enough" because I wasn't getting any interviews. Clearly I should have been submitting 600 applications

I've been working lately on spending any time and energy I can devote to the job search, on resume revising. Because that's the only thing within my control at this point that I can do differently, and the "spamming hundreds of job applications with my current resume" approach isn't working. I do finally have some friends who will help review my resume, too, and I personally have read up on plenty of tips too. So I'm hopeful. It's just very slow

I started my current job search in February. So that means we're 10 months in with nothing to show. Only one interview, and they ghosted me afterward. It's hard to not take this personally. But I do know that [1] the job market is absolute shit rn and has been all year, [2] I'm doing my best, and it's still nowhere near the amount of work into this search that I'd like it to be, and [3] I am shooting myself in the foot quite a bit by limiting myself to the region of one particular (expensive) city, but I have good reasons to need to do that

Ugh. Everything is so expensive, too, even though I've just been purchasing the absolute necessities for the past 6 months. I've been on short term disability for 4 months now (since I was working a barista job that was becoming bad for my health due to having to be upright/standing for so long), and it's not nearly enough. Even though I (luckily?) don't have to pay for rent or utilities right now (the roommate situation is real dicey though), I've still been going into debt every month just to pay for food, necessary bills, and healthcare

I've made the decision to go back to the barista job at the end of the month, despite being terrified I will pass out on shift, since we still haven't figured out how to effectively treat the POTS (though I do have appointments with actual specialists coming up in the new year, so there's plenty of hope there). But I literally can't afford not to be working, and no one else will so much as interview me

I don't say this to make people feel bad, just because it's unfortunately the way my life is truthfully right now, and has been all year. It absolutely sucks ass. And the worst part for me is that I know many people have it much worse, and society on the whole doesn't give a shit about any of us.

But it's also incredibly important to me to keep having hope, and equally important to keep taking action steps to try to improve my situation. It's already been paying off greatly with health stuff and with friendships. And, to some degree, with job stuff too - I'm learning a lot about what's important to me in a job, and how to present myself as a great candidate for those kinds of jobs.

[mystic-myrtille]

Do you think people who always hated the LS have an easier time hating on Movie!Adrien than people who used to ship it?

From what I've seen anti LS peeps like movie!Adrien, while fans of the show hate him. I thought that was weird at first, but after thinking about it, I think I have an explanation as to why.

The focus of Movie!Adrien's sad backstory was the death of his mother and that causing problems in his relationship to his dad (who wasn't as much of a horrible person as in the show, so abuse wasn't really an issue the movie touched on) but also affecting him as a person. He was closed off and afraid of getting close to people. Basically you could say he was more like his PV version. That's already a strong contrast from his show self with the strong craving for human friendship and love, so that probably already threw people off who liked show!Adrien.

We first learn about his mom when he goes to that theather where she used to perform. It's his place where he feels closest to her. Then he starts talking about it with Marinette/Ladybug and in the end he reconsiles with his dad, telling him that "yes, mother's gone, but we're still here" and they hug it out, accepting things for what they are. Now I don't want to give the movie too much credit because this "arc" was not fleshed out at all. Most of that happens in the montage. The basis was there, but after establishing that, they rush through the movie and put their focus more on fights, the romance and the music. And I think this rushing through things is the reason Adrien enjoyers couldn't connect to this other Adrien. Basically "The first one was great, so why should I care about this new one that is so different? He's less outgoing despite his dad already pushing him away and him hating loneliness? He's more mean to LB during their banter for no apparent reason? Where is Chat being a shoulder to cry on when LB looses her self confidence?"

If you present a new interpretation of a character to fans of said character, you'll have to try a little harder to convince them this interpretation is good with actual good story telling, which this movie severely lacks due to the very simplistic plot, and also... not relying on the show and the audience having to fill the blanks with information from the show as much as the movie did.

Meanwhile salters see show!Adrien as someone who gets a lot just handed to him because he made a sad face, generally has no agency and makes Marinette's life harder than it has to be and they don't like that. Then along comes this other version where his emotions don't feel like a constant pity party but are something he learns how to deal with, he doesn't constantly makes missions harder than they have to be (expect the ending sort of) and he finally has some agency. That's what I like about the way he's being portrayed. And as I said, the movie doesn't flesh those aspects out, but the premise alone of Adrien having to overcome his mother's death with the help of people around him is so much more interesting and likeable for me and probably others too, unlike the constant whining about how hard his life is until somebondy (Marinette) comes along and bends over backwards to fix it for him while he stands around and looks pretty.

So yeah, that's my take on the situation. I do find it pretty funny though how some stans act like Movie!Adrien is some alpha dude bro while show!Adrien drinks his respect women juice. Not to burst your bubble but both handle LB's rejection very poorly and are dicks to her about it. At least movie!Adrien still jumped to action instead of immediately abandoning his miraculous

[tdstoryarchive]

Book 1

Chapter 1:

We're All Running From Something

Quite the read. :)

A cool gentle breeze rustling through his short spiky hair as Flash runs around the track.

As his competitors approach from behind he speeds up to keep his lead. The wind picked up, people were cheering Flash in from the stands...

And....

"DARRIN WILLIAMS COMES IN FIRST!"

The announcer called out from his box within the stands. Thr crowd goes wild and starts chanting "Flash! Flash Flash!"

He made his way out of the track area, only to be halted by reporters.

"Another victory in the continued winning streak of Track Star, Darrin "Flash" Williams," a Channel 6 News anchor, Brie Walters commented as her cameraman filmed.

"Darrin may only be in college, but he has great potential to someday be in competitions such as The Olympics!"

When Brie noticed Flash, she ran to him with her microphone, "Flash! Flash! A second if you wouldn't mind!"

He stopped and looked at her. "Alright, but only for a few minutes."

Brie nodded. "How does it feel to win yet another State Track Meet?"

"Same as it always does, it feels nice to win." He stopped for a second. "But I don't run for thr medals or the trophies. It's simply just...a passion of mine."

"Besides Passion, is there anyone who motivates you to keep going with this running career?"

"Uh.." Flash had hesitated.

At this point, Brie was smiling wide, " A girl maybe.. someone like Beauty Pagent Winner, Heather Granville? You've been hanging out around her recently yeah??"

"Uh.." Flash shook his head. "No she's just a friend. But, I gotta go now."

Something was always followed Flash, something...not good, and the dread of it was sinking in so, he had to go. He ran away from the reporter, who was left suddenly confused.

Flash had run straight into Heather upon pure coincidence. Knocked them both right over.

Heather rubbed her head as Flash offered out his hand to her, he'd gotten up fast, and was very apologetic.

She accepted his hand and rubbed herself off. Today had already been a bit weird for her. She also had a splitting headache because of it.

"Its alright.. it's not the worst thing that's happened to me today...." Heather seemed kind of down, she let go if Flash's hand when she was back on her feet.

"Sorry to hear that..anything I can do to help?" Flash asked.

"Probably not unless you have 4,500 Dollars." Heather sighed.

"I most definitely do not." He was taken aback slightly. "But..what's it for? If you don't mind me asking."

She was quiet for a moment, before speaking low, "A nose job."

Flash put his head down low. "Heather, you don't need a nose job. Your nose looks fine."

"Just fine?" She asked her eyes pleading.

"More than fine, amazing flawless. You don't need to change your appearance like that to be pretty Heather." Flash said kindly, "You've got natural beauty. Not a lot of girls can say that."

"Aww," She found herself blushing at parts of Flash's words, "Thanks Flash. Means a lot."

Flash nodded in response. Half the time Heather did this sort of stuff so she could get compliments, so it's hard to tell if she was lying or being sincere.

But that's the first impression you'd normally get being acquainted with her. Flash sincerely liked her despite everything.

Maybe it's because they were both popular. Regardless the two friends hugged and went on their way.

Her heels clicked as she walked away from The Track Star. An important mission for a young adult in college.. asking her parents for money.

She'd already told Flash what she needed and he had helped her out a little, but all the other girls have been talking about Heather behind her back..

"Your nose is crooked!"

"Off Center"

"Beauty Queen isn't so pretty now huh?"

Maybe Flash was right, she is pretty and nothings wrong. Maybe these are just petty rumors spread by those who are Jealous of Heather. It's not worth the risk.

She arrived at the Café, she had asked her dad to meet her there. He was a successful businessman. Luckily she'd caught him on his lunch hour.

"Daddy," Heather looked at him with slight puppy eyes. "The other girls at my college say that my nose is crooked."

"And let me guess, you want thousands of dollars for...what? A nose job?"

"If...you would?" Heather asked nicely.

"Absolutely not." He said. "You don't need a nose job, you are a beautiful young woman okay?"

"Those other girls, well, they're just jealous."

Of course, Of course. What was Heather thinking. The world was in her grasp. Born into Beauty it seemed to even revolve around her. Truthfully, a fault of hers, conceded due to those around her. Perfectly Perfect as some would say.

Not all lives are as perfect as Heather though. Take Zoe Ingstrom for example.

She is an 8 year old girl who is the child of a broken couple. No further details needed. But it is rubbing off on her. She often makes her dolls hit each other...

That as you know is not healthy. It shouldn't be a thing a kid has to head let alone watch.

Distant yelling could be heard echoing in the halls of her house.

"WE'LL MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH A DEADBEAT, ZOE COULD HAVE A REAL FATHER AND A GOOD LIFE."

"DEADBEAT?" A male voice countered the female voice, booming louder. "I'M NOT THE ONE GOING AROUND WITH OTHER GUYS HUH?!"

Both parents had their faults. Honestly, weren't even fit or ready to have a child.

Zoe drowned it all out with the dolls. This time she was playing house. A mommy and a daddy doll were taking their baby doll out for a picnic in a nice park.

They had sandwiches, juice, chips and everything you can think of that would be at a picnic!

Zoe used her imagination to run away from her troubles, but it only got worse outside her room.

She decided to take her favorite dolly and climb out of her window. Luckily her room was on the first.

We are all running away from something.

[skaruresonic]

@beevean Out of morbid curiosity, I watched episode one of Netflixavania following a video explaining games lore (disclaimer: just the Classic era. There seems to be A Lot covered in this franchise). My first impressions are: = Despite being almost comically edgy, I really wasn't emotionally impacted by the writing. It almost felt like it was just going through the motions. We begin the show with the start of Dracula and Lisa's relationship, and yet we're told it was this great transformative love instead of being shown that. One minute she's convinced him to let her stay, the next she's being burned at the stake. Wow. The tragedy. Break out the tissues. Dracula says he loved her, ofc, but since we don't get to see their relationship in action, the show might as well shrug and be like "just trust me dood"

= It's really ironic that a show paying lip service to science conveniently forgets that burn stake victims were likely to die or fall unconscious from smoke inhalation before the actual burning. Meaning Lisa wouldn't have had the time to scream and plead for as long as she had.

= ...Is this another one of those "all religion is bad and I am smart for shitting on it" works? Because I had enough of that with Mists of Avalon lmao. Not that I'm the biggest fan of Christianity, but anti-Christianity tracts like these tend to be equally fucking obnoxious because they're always so one-note, disingenuous, and boring with how they constantly beat you over the head with "religion bad" and don't really add anything else to that particular thought

= Wallachia is portrayed as like, cartoonishly backwater. Women doctors existed in the Middle Ages. They were not all automatically burned at the stake because hurr durr technology is evil.

Some of them even treated kings; I recall reading about a medieval Jewish doctor who cured a young king's eye condition. somehow I get the feeling the writer of this show has not read A History Book

= I also found it funny how the priest named "strange weeds" in the list of Lisa's possessions, as if the people of medieval Wallachia were so backwards that they didn't know what fucking herbs were.

The absolute lmao. = I don't really know anything about Dracula other than he decided to oppose God due to the death of his first wife in the games, but even then, despite my sheer lack of knowledge, I still sensed something off about his characterization here. Given how the show practically has Dracula spell it out for us that He Really Loved Lisa More Than These Stinky Humans, I Swear Just Trust Me Dood at the episode's climax, I had the feeling that if someone like him had been told his wife was dying, he'd fly like the wind to go try and rescue her. Or, failing that, unleashing unholy wrath upon her killers. But no, he just broods to the old woman just to be Dramatique. no talk him, he angy >:c = crying blood. CRAAAAAWLING IN MY CRAAAAAWL, THESE CRAWL THEY WILL NOT CRAAAAAAAAWL = Alucard tells Dracula to go after the one who killed Lisa instead of condemning all of humanity to death, but he already fucking saw who did it so like lmao what kind of logic is this = The people of Wallachia were too dumb to live actually. And kinda had it coming tbh. Imagine you don't think Satan exists but one day he shows up out of nowhere in a cloud of hellfire and tells you to gtfo before he kills you all. And instead of getting the fuck out of Dodge that very night because holy crap Satan is real after all and worse, he's pissed off, you decide to stay. Like dumbasses. = oh is this just Hunchback of Notre Dame without the sexual repression? k cool. = I'll bet the animators really liked drawing all that gore. ow the edge = Why did we spend five minutes on a not-funny, prolonged bestiality joke? It did nothing but waste time. Is this what passes for humor on this show?

= Well. That just happened. Thought it'd be more interesting than that but nah