#I mean not great news but less bad than other news?

[friday411]

🍿 The 🍿 Long 🍿 Good 🍿 Rerun!🍿

Friday's 🔍 Top 10 25 26 Sherlockian Limericks!

"Elementary my dear Watson". Is not in a story – not one " My dear Watson", yes " Elementary" much less But all in one go? It's not done!

-=< ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ >=-

There once was a genius from London Whose cranium was really uncommon. When he learned something new For each factoid and clue He deleted an old, then moved on… -=<+>=- The police asked "Holmes, what should we do? He said "Look to the dog for your clue." "But he didn't do squat." "That's the curious part." And with that, Sherlock stumped the whole crew.

Bobby: Is there any other point to which you would wish to draw my attention? Holmes: To the curious incident of the dog in the night-time. Bobby: The dog did nothing in the night-time. Holmes: That was the curious incident.

-=<+>=- At crime scenes, Holmes' in his element. Police he finds an impediment. He's far more effective Than their "great" detectives. So he's earned the right to be arrogant.

-=<+>=-

To Holmes, every case was solvable "Once you reject the impossible Sometimes - strange as it seems Logic dictates that means You must accept the improbable."

"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." - SH

-=<+>=-

Holmes' methods are tested and true Wringing the facts out of each clue. "Don't jump to conclusions, They're often illusions." The truth will be known when he's through.

-=<+>=-

"Lestrade – why do you come to me last? I'd've gotten here sooner if you'd asked. Now the trail has gone cold." (He continued to scold.) "Compared to me, your men are outclassed." -=+=- "You don't understand my position Calling you up is an admission We've failed at our jobs!" (He practically sobs) "Crime-stopping is our only mission…"

-=<+>=- Mrs Hudson, the Baker Street saint Is a model of poise and restraint Two-twenty-one B Is a horror to see So she often has cause for complaint!

-=<+>=-

The truth be told, poor Mrs Hudson Found herself endlessly cussin' It's not that her tenants Were late with their rent, it's The shooting of walls and destruction.

-=<+>=-

The Hound of the Baskervilles

Why send Henry and I to the hall If you think he's in danger at all? We need you now Holmes, There are too many unknowns. You might Sir Henry's death then forestal! -=+=- Why Watson you are the only man Who I can trust to follow my plan. Keep our client alive For me till I arrive. If any can save him then you can! -=+=- The Baskerville curse is a hellhound And a terrible devil unbound But both dog and master Will suffer disaster O ne was shot on the moor, and one drowned.

-=<+>=-

Sir Arthur at Sherlock was peeved A plot to kill Holmes he conceived But then resurrected His brilliant detective Since too many fans were aggrieved!

-=<+>=-

"Holmes! Where have you been all this time? Were you just out fighting crime? I thought you were dead Though you'd only fled So why did you leave me behind?" -=+=- "Watson, I must apologize! I only left you to disguise I was tracking the men Who would kill you and then Made every one meet their demise."

-=<+>=- “You know,” said Holmes, “I have a brother.” “But surely there can’t be another?” “ I assure you there is, If you give him a quiz You’ll quickly find out that he’s smarter.”

-=<+>=- The Irregulars don't get their due (Despite all the spying they do) Holmes' little laddies Track down the baddies And are loyal to him through and through.

-=<+>=-

The Solitary Cyclist

"My dear Watson, you've wasted your time. You've missed your opportunity prime. You don't know how to spy You weren't close to the guy. We must nab him, or there'll be a crime. - =+=- "Holmes, did I really do that bad? What strategy should I have had?" "Though you didn't need grub, You'd go down to the pub And bought all the secrets they had." -=+=- (Holmes goes down to the pub and comes back bloody) "Oh Holmes, what kind of fight did you start? Those cuts on your knuckles must smart." "They're proof of outfoxing Our foe with my boxing. The other man went home in a cart!" -=<+>=-

Irene Adler is ever so fetching To a man they all say she's bewitching Wit like a razor Nothing can faze her So pity the poor prince that she's ditching!

-=<+>=-

For Holmes there was one woman only But not for matrimony holy Irene, nee Adler, Dueled him with valor So is Holmes in love? Not remotely!

-=<+>=-

"Holmes how can you risk psychosis? The risks you run are enormous! Morphine and cocaine Will both rot your brain. The damage that's done is atrocious!" -=+=- "Dear Watson, have you not noticed? My eyes are bright and in focus My cravings' been erased Because I have a case. Y ou've made the wrong diagnosis!"

-=<+>=- Eventually there comes a time When retirement sounds so sublime There are many unknowns Crime goes on without Holmes But – can Holmes go on without crime?

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

max for 🤏

or if it’s finished whichever one you’re most excited about

I am most excited for the Buck & Bobby story to wrap up so 500 for that!

---

“But, hey, Buck?”

“Yeah?” Buck replies. 

“I think this counts as an I told you so.”

🍎

Bobby watches from outside the hospital room as Buck meets his nephew. Daniel. Chim comes out to fill Bobby in. They’re calling him Daniel.

It’s strange. He’s watching Buck hold the baby, wide, teary grin on his face, but he’s hearing Chim talk about his new son. Bobby’s head is spinning a little. Maybe it’s how tired he is. He can’t focus on one thing at a time. 

“It was, like, way less intense than with Jee?” Chim is saying. “I mean, Maddie might not put it that way. But it seemed less intense! I was way less stressed. It seemed… Easier? Don’t tell Maddie I said that.”

“I won’t,” Bobby assures him.

Buck is saying something to the baby. To Daniel. Bobby can’t hear what. But there’s a soft, loving look in his eyes. Like he’s telling the infant exactly who they are to each other, and how much that means to Buck. 

“And, you know what’s weird,” Chim continues. “You’re here, and you’re my friend, Bobby, but also, this technically makes you my son’s great-uncle.”

This snaps Bobby out of his trance. He turns to look at Chim.

“Absolutely not,” he says. “I am not that much older than you.”

“And yet your son is my wife’s brother,” Chim smirks.

“You just had a child,” Bobby scolds. “You should be weepy and gracious, not menacing.”

Chim shrugs. “The other one is so sweet, I’ve decided to raise this baby to be menacing.”

“Let’s pray he takes after Maddie.”

🍏

“He’s so cute,” Buck laments, as if the cuteness is physically ailing him. And it’s sort of true. Looking at his baby nephew, so small in his arms, causes a full body, visceral reaction akin to melting, because he is simply the most precious.

“I know,” Maddie says, exhausted but smiling. 

“I love him,” Buck adds. 

“Me too,” Maddie sniffs, tearing up.

And then Buck is tearing up.

“Stop making such adorable babies,” Buck scolds. “They’re like biological weapons.”

“I can’t help our stupidly compatible genes!” Maddie protests. 

“Daniel,” Buck says to him. “You are one lucky kid.”

Maddie smiles. “He sure is.”

“I’m going to spoil you so much,” Buck promises. “Just like your sister. Every time you’re bad you’ll know who to come to.”

“My children will never be bad,” Maddie says. “They’re angels.”

“Oh, yeah. Totally. Not a chance of any mischief.”

“Exactly,” she says. 

They both laugh.

[porcupine-girl]

Here is something to remember as we watch Trump kick off the insanity with his ridiculous cabinet picks:

He’s not a dictator yet.

Some things - even some illegal things, now that anything he does “officially” isn’t illegal - will be a lot harder for him to do than others.

Blackmailing a foreign leader? Easy for him to do all by himself. Selling classified documents to our enemies? Unfortunately, easy for him to do by himself.

But some things require the cooperation of large chunks of the government. Not just on paper, in a way he can ignore, but in the fact that it will take hundreds to thousands of people to pull it off and any bit of government interrupting that process may stop it entirely. And yes, he controls a larger swath of that than last time, but he doesn’t control the whole thing yet.

These cabinet picks? If we can convince just a handful of the people who occasionally scraped together enough spine to stand up to him last time to vote against them, they’re toast. I’m literally planning on sending letters - not emails, USPS letters - to Sens. Collins, Murkowski, and Romney * begging them to do the right thing. Collins and Murkowski have already publicly doubted these cabinet picks. I doubt they’ll all three veto every bad pick, but if all three of them vote against even one, that’s damage reduced.

This DOGE thing? This CNN article points out that it’s likely to get bogged down by FACA, the Federal Advisory Committee Act, which in his last term stopped his plan to set up a committee to “investigate voter fraud.”

How did it stop him? Not by telling him he can’t do it, and then him listening and obeying. They stopped him by tying the whole thing up in the courts until he got bored and dropped it. He might own SCOTUS, but he doesn’t own the entire federal court system yet.

And he had a short attention span and doesn’t actually give a shit about anything. Do you think he actually cares about reducing government waste? Of course not, he just wants lower taxes and fewer regulations for himself and his buddies. If it doesn’t look like DOGE is going to get him that quickly enough, he’ll lose interest.

I’m not saying the system is functional enough to stop everything he wants to do. It wasn’t last time, and it’s less so this time.

But when you start to spiral into despair, remember that the system is big enough and lumbering enough to slow him down. To get in his way. Not every time, but sometimes. He will NOT be able to pull off every single thing he or Project 2025 claims he’ll do. We don’t know yet which things he will or won’t manage, and yes, he might make some of the worst things happen.

But he’s not a dictator yet, he doesn’t have total control yet. The more cooperation from others it takes to pull something off, the less likely he is to manage it. He will fail sometimes.

* I knew Romney was retiring but I thought his term wasn’t quite up yet. But no, he’ll be gone.

[dynamitekansai]

THE USOS REUNITE WWE SMACKDOWN (OCTOBER 25, 2024)

[sabertoothwalrus]

tips for getting people to like your ocs

*disclaimer: this is based on what’s worked for me, aka an artist that likes to make comics/storyboards. so this advice is directed at people who do that

you can do things like this:

Which is fun! Character sheets like this are great, especially for personal reference! But frankly, I don’t think most people engage with this (at least I personally don’t). You could have the coolest character in the world, but it will be harder for most people to feel invested when they’re presented so neutrally like this.

My main piece of advice is: get better at writing.

That might sound harsh when said like that, but let me explain what I mean! (Not trying to imply you’re bad at writing either!)

What I tend to do is just throw characters into situations with as little handholding as I can. Give enough context that readers can follow along, but don’t feel like they’re being explained to.

what can you learn about the characters through their designs alone? (age, personality, economic status, occupation, etc)

what can you learn about the characters’ relationship though their interactions alone? (are they close? familial? romantic? is there hostility? are they tense/relaxed?)

what are the characters currently doing? what were they doing previously (how long have they been talking)? what are they going to do next? can you convey this without dialogue?

how do they feel about what they are doing? are they content? focused? over/understimulated? would they rather be doing something else?

where are they? does it matter? would establishing a setting in at least one panel clarify the scene? is there anything in the enviroment that could tell some of the story?

what time of day is it? what time of year is it? what is the weather like?

Now, with all this in mind, I'm going to give you another example. I'm going to use completely brand new characters for the sake of the experiment, so you won't have any bias (aka I can’t use Protagonist from above, since you already know all about him).

Did this get more of an emotional response from you than the first example? Why do you think so? Who are these characters? How do they know each other? What else can you infer about them? What happened? Who is "she"?

Now, you don't have to actually answer all those questions. But think about them! You can tell people a whole lot about your characters without ever showing them a list of their likes and dislikes.

Obviously, comics aren't the only way to get people invested in your original characters! But regardless, easily digestible formats will grab people's attention faster than huge blocks of text, and comics are a lot less work than doing wholeass storyboards.

Now go and share your ocs with the world!!!

[euphoria-looney]

Who Said Money Can't Buy Happiness?

"I want that new money. Crisp money, Straight-from-the-mint money. Fresh money. Young money. Push against the tide~" New Money from the Great Gatsby.

Yan?Batfam x Neglected!F!Reader

Pt. 1

Divider Creds: @selysie and @anitalenia

This plot was inspired by @niwaart, @mimiiiiiiiiisstuff, and esp @coldilikeit

You know I've never pegged myself as the type to be too careless and get hit by a truck, because I'm not, that truck rammed into me and I was on the sidewalk, so, if I wake up, I'm suing.

That's what I thought would happen if I woke up in my world. newsflash, and spoilers, I seemed to wake up in this cliche bat family story as the neglected girl. This is actually the story "I Stole the Loving Family of the Villainess."

We follow around a girl named Serena, a cute name, by the way. It fits her as the female lead. She has blond hair and blue eyes, and multiple love interests, from Connor Kent to Wally West, and so on. She is adopted by the royal family, the Waynes.

And do you see this cute portrait with her in the middle brothers to the left, sisters to the right, parents on each side of her, oh and how can I forget even the main bulter, and can you see that small blot of paint, if you squit a little more. Ah- there I am.

That blot of paint- that's me.

While I'm monologing this I'm PUSHING SERENA DOWN THE STAIRS.

You know you can't help but feel bad for me like I'm the legitimate daughter and I get nothing.

Yes, you hear this my bitches, bros, and non-binary hoes. I'm the Villainess. If you guys spent less time fondling over the basic y/n of a female lead you realize how miserable [name] is as a character.

Her mom is too busy caring for her other siblings that she finds it too bothersome to deal with the least talented or least intelligent that goes for Alfred too because, in this story, we're royalty meaning more than one maid and butler, so why waste your time when you can have someone else do it.

Doesn't help that [name] has ears so she hears every mocking word that is uttered by her servants.

And of course, the main family does not give a pinky toe if she dies so that's so cool.

So [name] being a cliche Villainess is exactly stupid and untalented but all she wanted was her family's love and affection which is why she kept sabotaging Serena, which led her to her death.

Getting her memories suck, I mean my ego that was skyrocketing got hit with a pebble which is not a lot but that's because my ego is huge, this girl put herself down so much that I swear if her self-esteem was a rock she'd be crushed by now.

I mean the size of her self-esteem was so low it would be the opposite of my ego.

I mean how can it not be high? I'm rich, pretty, intelligent, and I've had diplomas in more than one field, Mary Sue? More like Barbie. I'm perfect, in more ways than one, except for relationships I've lacked in that department but I've never had one before so does that count? No.

Did I mention I was rich?

So anyway got her memories, it's so... tragic, but don't worry snookums because even in this life there's one defining trait that I still have, I'm rich. Okay, so not rich out of my pocket, I am a princess umkay, but I wasn't a woman in multiple men's fields for nothing.

Anyway back to the case in point, before I "woke" up [name] was having an impulse, her hands were itching to shove this one good orphaned girl that stole her place in the family, what timing do I have to come back right when [name] decided to take action on the impulse.

Hey, at least a perk of being the main character is that you don't take any damage whether that be physically inside or out. But I don't think the family will let it slide they are yanderes.

Yandere is a term for a character who is initially normal but soon develops an obsessive-compulsive grip on the person they like.

"I-I don't know one second I was walking down the stairs and the next I f-fell... but the only person behind me was [n-name]" Serena whimpered, ah- yes the struggles of a female lead the stuttering.

"[name] I can't believe you shoved Serena! This is-" Meet Palmola, my mother.

"So what?"

"Huh?" Palmola's eyes widened.

No in fact the whole family's eyes were in shock.

Since [name] would always make some batshit crazy excuse like the ghost of Grandpa pushed her or something. But why lie, I did shove her, for a good reason too.

"She walks so slow and sloppy, does she have any etiquette? I hope she would, with the amount of time she likes to spend with you Palmola. Fast, efficient, but proper. You did drill that into my head since I was young, didn't you? You even got mad when I did it wrong, is it so wrong I treat her like how I was treated?"

"Young lady-!"

"We'll discipline her later, Serena are you alright? Here take my arm sweetheart." Bruce let Serena wrap her arm around his.

The siblings paired up with each other, and Palmola took one of her son's arms. Leaving me with no one. A normal occurrence, at first it did numbers in the social circles, and still does, so each time I was left embarrassed. How annoying.

"Announcing the Imperial Family, the Gotham Empire, The Waynes."

Everyone flocked to each of the family but mainly focused their attention on Serena, whether it be her face, jewelry, dress, or how sweet she was compared to me.

"Announcing the Imperial Family, the Metro Empire, The Kents." Meet two of the love interests that right she goes for the big brother and the little brother, originally I'm engaged to Connor, but tonight that would change, the engagement is getting annulled, and his reason to the court is "I have set my eyes on someone new, and with many competitors, I can't lose."

It wasn't hard for anyone to know who it was, I think the only one that didn't notice was Serena herself.

Actually, this was a huge arc in the story when all the love interests fight for her love, there was no victor as she did the poly relationship, which really confuses me doesn't she need to make many offspring for each of the families respectable titles, you can't just combine into one entire thing, can you? That be very messy, I guess you could just give away titles but then who gets-

Anyway, that had a lot of readers mad, usually the whychoose situation would be okay, but she mainly focused on Conner so there was actually no reason to choose this route.

Never mind, that's a conversation for another day that I'll just forget.

Connor approaches me grabbing both my hands, attracting attention.

"[name] there's something I have to confess..."

"You're breaking off the engagement"

"I'm breaking- wait what?"

"You've found someone new, that has many competitors and you can't lose a battle you haven't even tried winning, I get it. But I'd like a downpayment of 10,000 gold and you can give the 490,000 gold later to my personal account and we call it even. Deal?" Hustling, though it's a 50/50 shot with many deals with enough eyes on us I'm sure he'll give in.

"S-sure, right. Right- I'll get that to you immediately-" I gave his hand a firm shake before heading off to the...

If you guessed balcony you're wrong, I'm heading over to the food table.

"Did just see what happened?"

"Is she planning something?"

"500,000 gold?!"

"Sister, what are you planning?" Barbara came over.

Also, who calls their sibling sister, like sure, that works.

"What do you mean?"

"That marriage was meant to connect our kingdoms, you'd let that go so easily, and we both know your gaze on Connor, what are you planning." She spoke through her fan, in a hushed voice.

If I made a scene as to not let him go I'd be embarrassing you guys, but if I show that I'm okay with him leaving me I'm ruining a political standing that wouldn't even work out, I'd still do something wrong.

"Have some decorum sister, we haven't had a proper conversation in years, and this is the first thing you say to me? Typical Barbara you think you know everything since you're older and more "mature""

You could tell Barbara didn't take that lightly as she gripped the fan handle tightly, I literally didn't even do anything.

"I'll spare you from any more veins popping up on that face, don't be an ass, we both knew Connor is in love with Serena and that me begging him not to break the engagement would only bring shame onto our family, so I did us both a favor and ended it." I tossed my hair back before grabbing some croissants that were covered in chocolate, powdered sugar, and some strawberries.

Life really is great.

"What about the scandal that would break out."

"Again, it would break out either way, now do me a favor and go back to your group they're staring at me and it's ruining the snack that I have on my plate."

She let out a deep breath before heading off.

Speaking of which I'd rather have a place to place my food and eat it, pretty sure there's a table in the garden under the gazebo if I remember correctly and I don't but whatever.

Just to find a moping Jon.

"Should you be out here?"

"It's unfair once again he gets to have everything"

Oh? Do tell.

I raised an eyebrow at him cutting my croissant in half before placing a half in front of him.

He finally looks up his face turned shocked like I was a ghost or something.

"[name]?!"

I bit into my croissant, nodding.

"Why'd you have to go and break off the engagement, now I have Connor as competition."

I knew this happened in the novel but I just remembered how young he was he's around Damian's age and I'm about the same age as Serena so this was a cry for help.

"Why do you even like Serena?"

"I don't really, it's just... I wanted something that he couldn't obtain he was going to be the first in line, and he's just better than me in lots of things because he has training so I thought, at least I had Serena."

Sometimes I forget that back then age gaps had no restrictions.

"That just means fewer responsibilities anyway, aren't you a little too young to be worrying about any of that? Now, I brought over this croissant but since I'm nice I gave you half." I ruffled his hair and he tried to swipe it away.

"I guess you're right." He started gobbling the desert down.

Honestly, I don't even know why this was a love interest he's literally a minor, maybe that's why the author got backlash against that and the novel was an overall dumpster fire with a basic self-insert MC.

I don't know what's worse the fact that they kept dragging on the storyline or the fact that I'm now in the storyline.

I mean seriously he only liked her because of the plot, he got over this situation so quickly that you wouldn't even know why he was moping earlier.

-

Now back to the circumstance at hand I was at home and seems the family never forgot about me shoving Serena down the stairs, they almost forgot about me breaking off the engagement.

"... what if she got a scratch on her face? Or if the clothes ripped?! Are you listening to me?!" I zoned out for a good second.

See we had gone back to the castle and they kept rambling on and on about what could've happened to Serena had the fall been more steep or rough, but like does she even have even status to attend these events in the first place?

"Since you seem to not care about this we're cutting you off of money for the next month!" She hollered in my ear once more.

"What were you thinking at the ball?" Tim cut into Palmola's ramblings.

"Normalize giving contexts, Tim." He scoffed.

"I was sparring with Kon the other day and he made some bogus statement saying he was breaking off the engagement, I didn't think he would do it, but allowing him to? Have you any idea what this caused?"

"Who am I to stop Crown Prince Connor, Tim? He has a woman to chase, and wasn't going to give it up for this contracted engagement." I glanced at Serena who flinched and hid behind Jason.

"I still doubt that you'd let him go that easily, you've been obsessed with him since you laid eyes on him."

"And you know that because you're my caring younger brother or because you like to throw it in my face on the downfalls of my life?"

"[name]!" Palmola scolded me.

Bruce could only sigh at the scene.

"Palmola!" I retorted, bringing a tense atmosphere to occur.

Alfred arrived at the scene handing me a letter.

"To you, Princess [name]." I opened it to see the rest of the money that Connor promised me had been added to my account even with the 10,000.

I'm rich, but this is just the start.

"If that's all I'll be heading back to my room." I tossed my hair back before ordering the maids to prepare my bath.

"You're taking too long," I told the maids who were congregating among themselves instead of doing their jobs.

"Well, usually, Princ- I mean Lady Serena wouldn't mind-"

"Do I look like her?" I gripped the maid's chin.

"Don't worry, since it bothers you so much to draw me a bath you can pack your things up and leave tomorrow, you're fired." I pushed back my hair in agitation.

"What-"

"Did you not hear me, you're fired, don't make too much noise, go on." I shooed her away.

She just dropped to her knees and started begging me, but I made the other maids drag her out now all of a sudden they wanted to switch up and act proper.

"Now, with that out of the way, someone draw my bath." I rolled my eyes.

I do not condone maid abuse, but what's the point of working here if you don't do your job? So firing is the only option.

3RD POV

"That girl- I swear I don't know where she got that attitude from, did you see the way she talked to me?!" Palmola scoffed.

Duke could only think about how [name] seemed different actually the whole family could be thinking about that.

Damian kept stroking Titus' fur while thinking about how [name] didn't just keep her head down and take his insults. Wait- now that he phrases it like that, it sounds really bad.

Tim just thought about his friend Connor, he had been the one that Connor ranted to about how annoying his sister was but he didn't think [name] would take the cancelation of the engagement that easily, he thought [name] would least throw a tantrum at best. And since earlier he noticed how [name] looked at them at the stairway after. [name] looked at them like they were lower than her.

Dick was processing the whole thing, did [name] always talk like she didn't care for their approval? I mean [name] spoke like this could've been a letter delivered to her door instead of an important conversation. This conversation was important, [name] hurt Serena and canceled a political connection of a lifetime, he could feel a headache approaching.

Jason could only blink at the audacity, sometimes when this happened [name] at least looked like she gave a darn but not only was she okay with that Connor boy leaving her, but also being cut off [name] would at least beg for some forgiveness. But nothing...?

Stephanie would've had a jaw-dropping expression right now, but had her fan covering her mouth, holy lord did that really just happen? I mean [name] did not even try to bother her at the ball but she also gave up the man she bothered until her final breath and 500,000 gold?! That's an insane amount one and two when did [name] learn to negotiate?

Cassandra felt confused about what had just gone down, did she hear that right? That whole thing, just what occurred? [name] changed in two seconds, like she blinked, Serena tumbled down the stairs and then she just acted strange.

(What you're sticking up for yourself? That's criminally insane right there.)

Barbara had already dealt with how [name] did a 180 at the ball but she just thought that was because she thought she had a wedgy at the moment, though in general [name] had never done this so what happened this time?

Bruce well who knows what he's thinking he just looks constipated like isn't supposed to be saving Gotham in another life?/j

Bruce sat there, he didn't raise [name] like that, wait-. He didn't raise [name] at all... Is this his fault that [name] was acting out right now? No, he's been busy and with all the duty of the empire on his hands he couldn't pause it for [name], like yes, he does that for Serena sometimes- all the time but that's different she had a hard childhood growing up.

Serena, well, she gritted her teeth and clenched her fist. For the first time, something didn't go her way. And what was that attitude, who did [name] think she was? She shouldn't even act like that, at this point, everyone knows she's supposed to be in her position. I mean look at her.

So it's time to be the center of attention. Wouldn't you think?

Serena let out a few sniffles catching the attention.

"It's all my fault that she's in a bad mood, I'm sorry."

The family quickly came to comfort her. Never mind what they were thinking before, how could [name] be such a child in this situation?

After taking a nice bath and sneezing I was now changed into my nightgown. These things are nice.

I took [name]'s diary, so was not thinking, writing down her devious plans here, one of the reasons she was caught and executed, and she couldn't rebut it as they had proof.

So I'll do us both a favor and burn it.

Tossed into the flame I could only stare at the burning journal.

Another burning pile.

I should sleep I have a lot of plans tomorrow, and only a few months till school starts.

With a flick of my wrist, the candles blew out and the doors shut.

One perk about this world is the powers.

(H2O just add water)

So instead of actually writing the next part for any other series of mine I decided to make a new writing idea 🌝, I'm also making others in my brain as we speak but we're going to keep them there until I finish at least one of my series.

Anyway did you like it?

I'm going back to work now (writing), *le sigh*.

Happy early Lunar New Year though, I'm manifesting a lot of red envelopes to myself and many others!

If there's anything too cringy, plot holey, or grammatically wrong, do inform me!

[steveseddie]

kiss it better

written for the @steddiebingo get lucky mini event | prompt: there was only one bed | rating: t | wc: 2,9k | cw: blood mention | tags: different first meeting, post s3, injured eddie, steve takes care of him

read on ao3

Eddie doesn’t know what to do. 

He’s all roughed up and bleeding, his lip stings, and his head is pounding. 

He should’ve known that stopping for gas was a bad idea as soon as he saw Carver and his stupid friends kicking it at the gas station. Foolishly, he thought they wouldn’t notice him or try anything. 

Turns out he was wrong. 

They snuck up on him, cornering him against his van, all four of them.

And maybe if Eddie had kept his mouth shut, they would’ve been fine just stealing his stash but of fucking course Eddie didn’t. Instead, he ended up getting beaten up until the store clerk came out and scared them all off– Eddie included, because apparently he was ‘asking for it’. 

So now he’s driving around, wondering what to do because his uncle is home at night for once, and Eddie doesn’t want Wayne to see him like this. He can’t go to Jeff’s house either– their parents don’t like Eddie, and they’ll like him less if he gets blood on their carpet. The same goes for the other Hellfire guys, especially the kids. Their parents might not know Eddie yet, but showing up like this certainly won’t give them a great first impression. 

A thought occurs to him. A stupid thought. He remembers last week when Henderson crashed his bike, and the person who fixed his cuts and scrapes was no other than Steve Harrington. Apparently, the guy has experience patching people up, and even more surprising is the fact that he’s a nice guy with a soft spot for Eddie’s new sheepies. 

When Henderson told them the story, Eddie scoffed and laughed at the absurdity of it, but Wheeler and Sinclair quickly backed the kid up. Harrington showing up later that night to give all of them a ride further proved that they might’ve been telling the truth. 

That doesn’t mean Harrington won’t tell Eddie to fuck off if he shows up at his door asking for help, but it’s worth a try. Eddie can’t keep driving around Hawkins like this, not when he’s starting to feel dizzy. 

So he drives to Loch Nora, easily spotting Harrington’s house thanks to the familiar BMW parked out front. 

Over the years, he’s heard the rumors about Steve’s parents rarely being home, and as he walks up to the door and rings the doorbell, he hopes they’re all true. That it’s just Harrington in the house tonight. 

But after a couple of minutes, during which no one opens the door, Eddie starts to wonder if Harrington himself might not be home at all.

“Fucking figures,” Eddie mutters, turning on his heels, resigning himself to spending the night in his van, hoping that the new sheriff won’t find him and write him up. 

But just as he takes a step towards his van, the door opens behind him, and when he glances back, he finds a bleary-eyed Steve Harrington peeking through the opening. 

His eyes widen the moment he sees him and Eddie can’t help but notice that he also relaxes a little, like he was expecting something worse than the town’s freak knocking on his door in the middle of the night. 

“Munson?” He says, his eyebrows furrowing.

Eddie gives him a dorky salute. “Evening, Your Majesty!” 

“What are you doing here?” He asks, but then Eddie steps into the porch light, and he gasps. “Jesus, man. What happened to you?” 

“Fucking Carver and his fucking friends. They took my stash and beat me up.” Steve winces sympathetically, but Eddie can tell he’s still wondering why that led to Eddie showing up at his door. “Henderson mentioned that you fixed him up the other day, so I thought– I, uh–” He stops talking as he realizes just how dumb this is. Harrington and he aren’t friends, they don’t even know each other. He grimaces. “You know what? Nevermind, this was stupid, I’ll just fuck off. Night, Harrington.”

“Dude, wait!” He says, opening the door wider. Eddie gets a glimpse of a bat in his hand, and he can’t help but wonder exactly what Steve was expecting to find at his door. 

“You, uh– you’re gonna finish the job?” Eddie asks, staring pointedly at the bat, which he can tell now is covered in nails. What the fuck?

“What?” Harrington looks down at the bat. “Oh. Shit, man, no, I just– sorry, uh–” he trails off, simply setting the bat aside against the wall. “You don’t have to go.”

“No, I do,” Eddie says, tugging a lock of hair in front of his face, embarrassed. “You don’t owe me anything, we’re not even friends–”

“No, but you’re friends with Henderson, Wheeler, and Sinclair.”

“So you’ll help me for them?” Eddie asks quietly. 

Harrington shrugs. “Won’t be the worst thing I’ve done for those shitheads.” And before Eddie can ask what he means by that, he steps aside, holding the door open for Eddie. “Come in, man.”

Eddie steps over the threshold and hears the door click shut behind him. It’s not his first time here, but the house looks so much different without a party happening. Empty, sterile, cold. 

Harrington gestures at the staircase. “First aid kit is upstairs,” he says, and with a nod, Eddie follows him to the second floor and into his bedroom. This– this is new. Never in a million years did Eddie think he’d be in Steve Harrington’s bedroom. So while he looks for the first aid kit, Eddie walks around and snoops. 

He doesn’t find anything interesting. Harrington’s room is pretty boring actually– the plaid wallpaper, the sports magazines on the desk, the action movie posters over the bed. But then Eddie notices a cork board near the desk, and stuck to it there are pictures of Harrington with Eddie’s kids, as well as a few others– the redhead girl who recently moved across from his trailer, the Byers kid that went missing a few years ago, a girl with short curls that he’s never seen before, and a girl who Eddie guesses is Sinclair’s little sister. So the kiddos weren’t lying, Harrington does have a soft spot for them. Or maybe for nerds in general, Eddie thinks when he recognizes Robin Buckley from the marching band in a few pictures as well. 

Maybe that’s part of the reason why Harrington didn’t shut the door in his face. Eddie is a nerd, after all. 

“Found it,” Harrington says, heading to the bathroom and gesturing at Eddie to follow. He sets the first aid kit on the sink, rummaging through it. With a wince, Eddie hops onto the counter next to it.

“Dude, are you expecting an apocalypse or something?” He snorts, staring at the contents of the kit. He expected painkillers and some bandages, but Harrington has a fully stocked first aid kit. Eddie glances up from what he’s pretty sure is a suture kit to see Harrington’s nose scrunched up. 

“I tend to get beaten up a lot,” he mumbles. “I’m sure you’ve heard about that.”

Eddie has. He thinks back to Harrington getting beaten up by Byers, then by Hargrove, and then last summer by– actually, Eddie doesn’t know what happened that time. He just knows it had something to do with Starcourt burning down. 

“So you’re an expert?” He asks, legs dangling back and forth. That is, until Steve moves to stand between them. 

“Yup. You’re in good hands, Munson,” Steve says, playfully wiggling his fingers.

Eddie gulps, suddenly nervous about having Harrington’s hands on him. Maybe he should’ve thought this through. 

Steve probably notices his hesitation, and his hands pause halfway to his face. “This might sting a little, but I gotta clean up the cuts first.”

“Go for it, doc,” Eddie jokes, but his voice wavers a little. 

Harrington huffs out a little snort, the corner of his mouth ticking up for a second before his expression turns focused. He gently touches Eddie’s face with a strip of gauze and whatever he soaked it with makes Eddie flinch when it comes in contact with the cut above his eyebrow. 

“Sorry,” Steve says sympathetically. He dabs at the cut again, and even if he knows what’s coming, Eddie can’t help but inch back. “Dude, stay still,” he chastises, using his free hand to grab Eddie’s chin and keep his face in place. When he finishes with that cut, he moves on to the one on Eddie’s cheekbone. The whole time Eddie is holding his breath, not because it hurts but because Steve is touching him so gently, and it’s making his stomach flip flop nauseatingly. 

“Why did Carver beat you up?” Harrington asks, giving Eddie a short break while grabbing more gauze.

Eddie snorts. “Do jocks need a reason to beat up freaks?”

Steve’s lips purse. “Guess not.”

“I didn’t do anything, if that’s what you’re asking, uh–” He trails off momentarily as Steve grabs hold of his chin again and starts cleaning up the cut on his bottom lip. “I, uh, I might’ve insulted his dear mother, but that was only after he and his asshole friends cornered me.”

Steve’s lips stretch into a bemused smile. “It’s good that you fought them off when you did.”

Eddie throws his head back with a cackle. Steve hmphs and grips his chin more firmly, making his stomach do a backflip. “Bold of you to assume I could fight off four jocks on my own. I’m built like a fucking twig, man.”

Steve’s eyes dart down to Eddie’s bare arms in his cutoff shirt. “You’re not,” he mumbles before clearing his throat and averting his eyes, his cheeks pink under the bathroom light. “How did you uh, get away then?”

“Guy from the store scared them off,” Eddie mumbles as Steve cleans his last cut, the one on the bridge of his nose. He leaves the spot between his legs to get more supplies and Eddie finds himself looking down at Steve’s arms, big and strong with muscles rippling underneath his sleeping shirt. Steve could probably fight off four guys with those arms. 

Or not, he thinks when he remembers how many times he lost a fight in the last couple of years. Still, Eddie bets they could do some damage. At the very least, they could easily lift him. 

“I don’t think you need stitches,” Harrington says, snapping Eddie out of his thoughts. He tries to school his expression into one that doesn’t say he’s fantasizing about Steve lifting him into this very own sink. He really doesn’t need another jock punching him tonight. 

“That’s good news, Nurse Harrington.”

“Your face will probably bruise, though,” Steve says, grabbing some butterfly band-aids, applying them over the cuts.

Eddie grimaces. So much for Wayne not finding out.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, you’re good,” he says, gesturing at him to continue. “I, uh, I didn’t want my uncle to see me like this. That’s why I didn’t go home, he ain’t working tonight.”

“What were you gonna do if I didn’t open the door?”

Eddie shrugs, wincing a little when Steve applies the band-aids over the cut on his nose. “Sleep in my van, probably. Might do that anyway when you’re done patching me up, doc.”

Steve scrunches up his nose. Eddie gets hit by the urge to kiss it. “Yeah, no, you’re not. You can stay here. I didn’t go through the trouble of fixing you up so you can crash your van and die from a possible concussion,” he says, his hands settling on his hips. 

“What do you know about concussions, Harrington?” Eddie asks, trying to ignore the way his body tingles at the prospect of spending the night here.

“I’ve had like, three at this point, man,” Steve says with a snort. “So you’re staying?”

“If His Majesty insists,” Eddie says with a royal twist of his hand. 

Steve shakes his head amusedly and closes the lid on his first aid kit, which Eddie takes as a sign that they’re done here and hops down from the sink. 

“So which guest bedroom is mine?” Eddie asks, following Steve out of the bathroom.

He pauses and gives Eddie a sheepish look. “Oh, uh, actually there are no guest bedrooms.”

Eddie frowns. That doesn’t sound right. “What? But I heard Tommy Hagan brag about hooking up in every one of them during your parties.” 

Steve pinches the bridge of his nose. “Fucking Tommy,” he mutters. “Yeah, we used to have guest rooms but my parents turned them into a gym, an office, an art studio. Since they never have friends or family over.”

“So I guess I’ll take the couch?” Eddie asks. It looked comfortable enough from the glimpse he got before Steve led him upstairs. Better than the old one back at the trailer.

But Steve shakes his head. “No way, you just got the living shit beat out of you. I’m not making you sleep on a couch.” Before Eddie can ask where he’s making him sleep, he casually adds, “We can share my bed.”

“What?”

“Yeah, I’ll let you borrow some clothes to sleep.”

“What?”

Steve’s mouth twitches up and Eddie wonders if he’s messing with him, but then he walks over to his closet and starts rummaging through his clothes. “Do you prefer shorts or sweatpants?” He asks over his shoulder. 

The thought of wearing any clothes belonging to Steve leaves Eddie gaping like a fish. 

“Eddie?” Steve says when he doesn’t get an answer. “Uh, sweatpants are fine,” he stammers out. 

Soon, he’s holding in his hands one of Steve’s old Hawkins High shirts and a pair of sweatpants. He excuses himself to change in the bathroom– and takes advantage of the privacy to have a little freak out because he’s about to sleep in Steve Harrington’s bed wearing Steve Harrington’s clothes next to Steve Harrington. 

He wonders if Steve was right about him having a concussion, and if that could be causing hallucinations. That would make more sense than whatever is happening instead.

But concussion or not, Eddie figures he might as well roll with it.

He allows himself a sniff from Steve’s shirt that he’s wearing before he tells himself that he needs to be normal if he doesn’t want Steve to get weirded out and kick him off the bed.

But when he steps out of the bathroom, Steve is the one acting weird, by building some kind of pillow barrier in the middle of the bed. 

“Uh, I know you’ve probably heard the rumors about me, man, but you don’t have to do that, I won’t jump you in your sleep,” Eddie says, hanging a hand from his neck. 

Steve cocks his head, frowns and then when he realizes what Eddie is saying, he frantically shakes his head. “What– oh, no, dude, no– this isn’t for you, I’m not worried about that,” he says earnestly. “This is for me! I tend to move a lot and cuddle anyone I sleep with.”

Eddie relaxes a little. If Steve knows about him and he’s not throwing pillows at him, then maybe he’s cool with it, so he hesitantly gets on the bed– and even lets himself crack a joke. “And you don’t want to cuddle with me?” 

Thanks to the moonlight filtering through the curtains, Eddie sees Steve’s cheeks pink up. “I do, but uh, I just don’t want to hurt you.”

Eddie’s brain screeches to a halt. “Back the fuck up you– you do?”

“Uh, yeah,” he chuckles, brushing his hair back. “Who doesn’t love cuddling?”

“Straight guys sharing a bed with a gay dude,” Eddie says, blinking at him with owlish eyes. “That’s who.”

“Well,” Steve starts casually before upending Eddie’s whole world. “I’m not straight, so your point is moot.”

What in the ever loving fuck? 

“I think– I think you were right about the concussion,” Eddie mumbles dumbly. “I’m pretty sure I’m hallucinating right now.”

Steve rolls his eyes. “You’re not. I mean it. Dudes are hot.”

A hysterical laugh tumbles from Eddie’s lips. “Yeah,” he says in a high-pitched tone, giving Steve a pointed once over. “I know.”

Steve’s lips stretch into a smirk. “Thanks, but I was talking about you.”

Eddie squeaks pathetically, and the only thing he can think to do is throw the covers over his head. 

Steve’s chuckles are muffled, but he still hears him down there. “Relax, Eddie, I won’t jump you,” he says, echoing his words. 

“Jesus Christ,” Eddie mumbles. “I, uh, wouldn’t mind.”

“What was that?”

Eddie removes the covers, his cheeks are burning and Steve can probably tell by how red they must be. “I said I wouldn’t mind.”

Something dark flashes across Steve’s face before he gets it under control. He reaches over the pillow barrier to brush his thumb gently over the cut on Eddie’s cheekbone. “Tell you what, if you make it through the night, I’ll do it.”

Excitement and anticipation bubble up in Eddie’s chest. With a feigned pout, he says, “You would deny a dying man his last wish, Stevie? That’s cruel.”

He snorts amusedly. “Let’s say I’m giving you an incentive to live.”

“How do I know it’s worth it?”

Just as he did in the bathroom, Steve grabs Eddie’s chin and uses his hold to pull him closer, over the mountain of pillows until he can press his lips against Eddie’s. 

He keeps the kiss short, sweet, and ends it with a swipe of his tongue over Eddie’s cut lip. It stings a little, but he doesn’t give a fuck. 

Eddie blinks dazedly at Steve, who is grinning smugly. 

“Now you know,” he says, and with a wink, he flops down on the bed. “Sleep, Munson. And don’t die.”

Eddie doubts he’ll me able to sleep after that, but he refuses to die before he has the chance to kiss Steve Harrington again– or before he can send Jason Carver a fucking thank you note. 

[rosesnbooks]

❤️Scorpio placements🖤

💋sun in scorpio: scorpio suns are complex and those with this placement vary a lot. i have no trouble figuring out someone's moon in scorpio but it gets a bit difficult when it comes to the sun. either way, they always have a strong presence and they don't go unnoticed. people tend to form strong opinions about them, whether good or bad. their aesthetics can be different, with some even leaning toward softer looks. the women can be really cheerful and soft, but persevering. the men tend to be more on the "man of few words" side while trying to upkeep a masculine demeanor. they tend to have a great memory and they form strong attachements with their loved ones. they can be either shy or outgoing, but one thing they have in common is that they remain a mystery to a certain degree. they are full of life and they are very curious, and intellectual. they are funny and they love humorous people too. they are interested in many things and they like direct people who are fun to be with. the toxic ones can be really mean and gossipy, while others can be attentive and interesting. they appreciate the beauty in small things in life but they also have high ambitions and aren't afraid to dream big. they are responsible and mature for their age (obviously not everyone but yeah). they are hidden romantics and they have a crush most of the time

💋moon in scorpio: sensitive people with lots of emotions they try to keep hidden. they are very careful who they open up to and people tend to drain their energy, or they simply get tired of keeping up appearances. they want to have people in their lives who make them feel safe and they want someone they can confide into. they try to be independent but they want to rely on others sometimes too. they crave to be understood but they also want to remain a mysterious persona. they also crave a lot of passion in their daily lives and romance. they need hobbies and people that make them feel alive. those who do not manage to find such things tend to become obsessive with love and..yk...because it can give them that high. nevertheless, they are very passionate and creative. they are intuitive and feel other people's emotions but their emotional intelligence depends on their personal growth and their ability to be open-minded. they are prepared to do whatever it takes for their loved ones. i have noticed that they can be hard on themselves and that they wish to be more detached because it seems less complicated. despite craving privacy, i think many of them like attention, especially from the right people. they are yearners at their core.

💋ascendant/rising sign in scorpio: these people seem intimidating at first. they could have a soft aesthetic and everything and still not be easily approachable because of their aura. and yet, people can't seem to stop gravitating toward them. they usually leave an impression even in the shortest of interactions and people want to know what's happening in their mind. they are a lot more sensitive than they look. when relaxed and confident, their demeanor can be hypnotizing and they can turn on their charm easily. i have noticed that they find a fashion style they like and stick to it religiously. many prefer darker colors or more neutral tones they can combine with similar shades. the textures can vary but I rarely see them in any flashing colors. their eyes have a specific depth to them and you feel like they're always out of your reach somehow. they are a bit shy with new people but once they relax they can be humorous and talkative. others may think that they flirt a lot more than they actually do, which can get annoying. i've noticed that they attract emotionally immature people and men who show signs of toxic masculinity. they really like music and their alone time. food is also important to them!

💋mercury in scorpio-these people may not be of too many words unless they feel comfortable with you and even then, they are not yappers (in my experience). they observe people to form strong impressions. they are not the biggest fans of confrontation because they know things could get out of hand, so if they decide to fight with you, you must have pressed all the wrong buttons; especially if you hurt someone they love. they are honest and they like to get straight to the point. they talk with passion regarding the things they like. many of them really like gossip and their tendency to form strong first impressions can be impulsive and incorrect at times, so they need to be a bit more open-minded and patient with people. they are true skeptics sometimes because they need to believe in something 100% before acknowledging it. they also like taboo/darker topics. they are interested in the human nature and value truth even when it is uncomfortable and painful. they know how to read between the lines and figure out the true meaning of someone's words, so they are not easily fooled. they are not interested in small talk, in fact it drains them. i think journaling is amazing for all signs, but scorpios could benefit from it especially. basically, any outlet that lets them express their emotions and creativity without shame or fear, is good for them. it can be hard to compromise with them sometimes, and they need to work on that.

💋venus in scorpio-they want partners they can trust wholeheartedly. they may get entangled in some affairs because of their passionate nature and a deep desire for love. when they find the right person for them, they are dedicated, loyal and borderline obsessed haha. their partner becomes a part of them. i've seen some people write that scorpios can cheat their partners if they meet someone who provides the passion that is otherwise lacking in their relationship. i think anyone can cheat, so i don't have the need to comment on that. they probably had some karmic relationships in their life that taught them, the hard way, the kind of partner that's actually good for them. they are not afraid of seeing their loved one's dark sides. in fact, that just brings them even closer because they feel like they got to know them properly and they feel less ashamed of their own darker characteristics. these people are really sensual and they make their partners feel desired and wanted. truly not for those with weaker hearts. once again, they can be stubborn so they need a patient partner with a strong character. they need someone who will be a safe haven for them; someone intuitive, kind, honest, responsible, and well-tempered. they want a healthy relationship, the kind that feels like true love. people who value their freedom and alone time a lottt are not the best match for them, as well as those who lack empathy and healthy communication. in regards to their style i think it is more varied than people may think. people always say that they are romantic but i think this depends on the rest of their chart althoough in general, they are.

💋mars in scorpio-these people are very intense. they can be stubborn and they dislike obeying authority. if they think they're right about things, they can find it difficult to consider other perspectives. they put their heart into everything they do and they dislike doing anything half-heartedly. once they lose interest in something, it is hard to get right back to it, which is why they tend to excel in things that interest them, while performing more on the average side on things that don't matter to them/make sense. they are strong-willed and no matter the obstacles and the dark periods in their life, they persevere and learn from every experience. i've written once that they tend to be either hypersexual or on the asexual spectrum, haven't noticed anything in between much (and i still stand by it). when they get angry they feel consumed by it, and the feeling can stay with them for a while. that can be really tiring. they want to resolve things immediately but they feel blinded by their emotions so they usually have to wait to cool off and think about things before giving a healthy response. they can say hurtful things and hold grudges for a long time. i feel like they are fully aware of all the darker aspects of their personality. they can be overly protective and possessive. but, their love is deep and strong, so people feel lucky to have them in their lives. people can depend on them and trust them with anything. they like taboo topics/darker topics and they are interested in spirituality; they even find comfort in it.

💋saturn in scorpio-i don't know anyone with this placement but i've heard a couple of things along the years. it is no secret that these people are afraid of intimacy and exploring their emotions. they are afraid of being too much and saying the wrong thing, which gets in the way of their personal and even professional life. they can be stubborn, secretive, and quick to judge. they are scared of relying on others so they deal with things alone. life has not treated them kindly and they underwent many transformations. they are strong individuals who can overcome any obstacles and they are very careful and observant. they don't rush into things and they are quite smart. their emotions and intuition provide a rich inner life and a big and loving heart that just needs to give people a chance more. they understand others because of everything they've been through and they can be someone's rock in difficult times. people naturally respect them and listen what they have to say attentively. i've read that they are often responsible with their finances and other reponsibilities. once they decide to work on themselves, a bright future awaits because they will realise their strength and invite wonderful people into their lives.

💋jupiter in scorpio-these people do anything their heart desires even when scared. they are careful, smart, passionate, and loving. they have most luck when they welcome change in their lives. that's when they grow as people and find many good things and people on the way. they use their intense emotions as a tool that guides them toward the truth, which is why they often make the right decisions and trust the right kind of people. they are magnetic and attractive. their wilpower is amazing and they have a great intuition. a lot of them are interested in spirituality and astrology. tarot may be something they are interested too. they have the ability to use their strengths for a good cause or for their selfish gains. this depends on them entirely. life can test them more than others which might seem unfair, which can lead someone toward a path of distrust and manipulation, or courage and honesty (and love, obviously). despite it all, some of them can be victims of manipulation (through media or the ones closest to them). people may learn what makes them tick and what they love and adapt accordingly, only to fulfil their malicious plans for them. i know someone with this placement who uses their intensity to get what they want and it can be morally troubling at times (e.g. using fear and power). they need to nourish their confidence and relationships with others in order to keep growing. nevertheless, they are interesting people you can't seem to forget

♡Thank you for reading dear! A little disclaimer: I am not a professional!♡

©rosesnbooks

[kolsmikaelson]

— ART DONALDSON NSFW ALPHABET

NOTES — been deep in my mike faist era for the longest time and i’m so obsessed w art it’s bad, so here we are! hope you enjoy <3.

WARNINGS — 18 + content mdni, fem!reader, not proofread

join my taglist or follow @rodrickhefley to see when i post

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

needy as fuck. he’ll grab his shirt that had been tossed to the floor to clean you up quickly before tossing it back onto the floor and just wrapping himself around you, keeping his head on your chest.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he looooves his arms, he always liked them, but maybe how much you like them is what made them his favorite. he’s obsessed with your legs, he loves the way they feel when they’re wrapped around his head while he’s eating you out or how they feel wrapped around his waist when he’s pounding into you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he loves to cum on your tits. it’s his favorite place to cum, other than inside of you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

the two of you met in college, when he was much less experienced, so one time when patrick is visiting he recruits him into teaching him how to fuck you better. art knew he was alright but he wanted to be great for you.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

not super experienced, sure he’d fooled around some before he met you but that’s about it. with some help from patrick he definitely knows what he’s doing.

F = Favorite position ( goes without saying)

cowgirl. he’s a tit guy and loves that he can see your tits bouncing in his face while you’re riding him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

it can go either way, usually he’s a little on the goofy side, but sometimes, after a bad match he’s not in the mood to be goofy.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

not clean shaved by any means but he keeps everything under control.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

the most romantic. showering you with love and affection is all that he wants to do <3.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

used to jerk off so often, but as the two of you got older he did it less and less but maybe that’s because you were always there to do it for him.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

praise kink (giving or receiving), size kink, spit kink, little bit of a mommy kink if he’s feeling really needy.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

his dorm, his car (but only if parked in a decently secluded place), or the shower.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

winning gets him going, the adrenaline from the game and from winning gets the best of him every time.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

no choking, you specifically, every once in a while he’d be okay with you lightly squeezing his throat while you’re on top of him riding him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

definitely prefers giving, he’d spend as long as you let him finding out what makes you tick, exploring every inch of your cunt, but he’d never turn down a blowjob if offered.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

both! but usually fast and rough.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he loves them. a quickie before a match or before you leave for class, always put you both in a good mood.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

yes and no, it just depends on what you or he wanted to try. but he’d always at least consider it for a while if you were to ask to try something new.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

2-3 rounds usually, sometimes it could be 4. he lasts a decent while, as long as he gets you off first then he’ll let himself cum, though sometimes he’s cum in his pants when he’s eating you out but really it’s a win-win situation.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he’ll use your vibe on you every once in a while but usually he’s not huge on toy usage. but he’s not completely against it either.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he gets better at it over time but you’re usually the one doing all the teasing instead of him.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

so loud, he’s always whimpering and whining and moaning in your ear.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

just like patrick, he’d try and feel put how you felt about having a threesome with patrick, because at the end of the day, whether they’d admit it or not they’re not complete without the other but that doesn’t mean he loves you any less, because trust that man to be absolutely obsessed with you.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

a good 5-6 inches soft, and pretty girthy too. and he knows just how to use it.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

pretty high. he’s obsessed with you and obsessed with fucking you.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

oh he’s out like a light. his eyes are droopy when he’s cleaning you up but the moment his head falls onto your chest, he’s done for.

© kolsmikaelson : please do not copy, repost, or modify any of my content.

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Calming the Emperor God

Geta x wife! reader

warning : hurt/comfort, kissing, cuddling, mention of murder and sickness

Summary : Rome seemed to turn on their rulers, what Caracalla compensated with more Colosseum fighting Geta had to face reality as much as he thought he was divine, he alone couldn't control everything. The demand of his head was only the beginning as the emperor sought advice and care in the arms of his wife.

info : A work for Geta I just wanted to give him a long hug, enjoy reading ;)

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marriage, when you were a ruler of a empire, it was important to have a wife after your appointment, someone you loved or not, someone who could give you an heir.

He had even less regard for his father than his brother, a man driven by empathy and kindness as well as hope, a weak man whose only great deed was to father him and Caracalla with his mother, nothing else. That was the only reason for his damned father's last acts, a marriage.

A marriage three years ago, on his twentieth name day, he took her as his wife, a young lady of his own age from a noble house of the united kingdoms under Rome.

He hadn't thought much of her then, but when he looked at the sitautioon now, she was more than just his love, she was his shield, the judgement of the people and a light that all kinds of people looked up to so that the people wouldn't rise up in revolt.

She was a pillar at his side who could lead Rome, advise Caracalla and be there for him at the same time…the only thing that had not been created in all this time was an heir.

An inheritance that in theory the two emperors had in each other, but with each passing day Geta saw how bad things were for Caracalla, ,,The Holy Roman Empire will belong to the world, but three deaths would mean its end" he had said shortly after their wedding, at first still indifferent to her, even disgusted by her failure to conceive and paranoid that she would betray him.

But none of this mattered when he saw how gentle she was with his brother, how good she was at managing the senate and how understanding she was towards him every day.

,,My doubts were never about you, my husband, a marriage of the dead is beyond our influence and your circumstance worries me more than my own" she had admitted when she realised how bad things were for the emperors.

Who ruled a world empire, how easy she had had it, several siblings, no illnesses, her parents a long life and security, everything Geta and his brother didn't have.

Both had hardly received any training in warfare, politically she hardly knew what to do and they had no connection to the people.

From the moment they were born, they had already come too close to the sun and would never raise their wings again. She was a woman, a princess, aware of her role as a mother, but if she couldn't even be that, she would do anything to support her husband.

Taking her eyes from the marble floor that lay cold beneath her sandals, she looked back at her husband Geta presenting new proposals for the military, improvements and enhancements to a Senate that seemed barely interested.

They were strategies and proposals for which Geta had spent hours and nights in the library with her, he was trying so hard for his people, or at least for the world for now, the dream of a Rome that covered the world, it wasn't fair that the senate consisted only of fake snakes, but you couldn't kill them either.

No one is interested but us she thought and sat down again on Geta's throne when she heard a giggle next to her.

Caracalla was once again more than just bored by all this and began to play with his fingers, seeing that Geta gave her a quick glance and an unsaid ‘thank you darling’ seemed to come from his eyes, she rose to take care of Caracalla.

As much as the presence of both emperors was required, Caracalla was disturbed by the introduction of the laws the blond was probably about to rise herself, she put her hand on his shoulder, ,,We should leave Geta alone, how about a game?" she asked in a whisper and saw the grin widen. Already sending Caracalla forward.

She bowed to Geta who had paused in his speech, allowing everyone a brief moment to think, ,,I'm already longing for your liberating kiss of my sorrows" he murmured to her before placing a kiss on her cheek, a face with a ‘divine’ countenance looking back at her before she withdrew from the senate.

Once again, her god had to try to cope on his own, an event that occurred weekly and took its toll on him, for what was an emperor without preparation since childhood?

He was nothing.

Footsteps followed Caracalla, who was already pulling out his favourite figurines from a wicker basket, ,,The conquest of Rome with the crucifixions of the Christians!" he announced and she clapped as he told her everything in meticulous detail.

Not a game in the sense, but something amusing for him, especially when he could stab the little figures and she had to make the death noises that he always found extremely sweet, ,,Your memories are unfathomable and fascinating," she said and tapped him on the forehead.

He could hardly remember what was served for dinner yesterday, but he seemed to know such a battle going back hundreds of years completely by heart, it was the madness you couldn't control.

But that didn't matter because, apart from the battle, they played together with Dundus and in the afternoon she had to sing Caracalla a lullaby because otherwise he wouldn't go to bed, otherwise he would only cause more ‘problems’ like a small child.

One thing that hardly bothered her anymore she knew it would give Geta less to worry about and she had a few more hours of peace and quiet in which to organise her own things, ,,Sleep well little king" she whispered as she closed the door to his room and with a sigh made her way back to her own room.

Knowing that the meeting in the senate would take a long time she returned to her art of the gods, knowing that only they could help her and her family Appolo I pray to you for healing and beauty over my brother-in-law Caracalla and husband Geta she heard her own praying voice in front of her altar to Appolon the model for Geta.

In all the golden clothes he wore, even the make-up was dedicated to the god, but the gods seemed to have abandoned the brothers since the birth and not given her a blessing.

She spent the next few hours embroidering, writing and reading books, hoping to get advice from former emperors on how to cultivate fields to increase yields, which were getting lower and lower.

This was bad for the population of Rome, the army and the imperial family itself, who had to cope with all this without falling into the madness that Caracalla was making worse and worse.

The goblet of water next to her was refilled every now and then and the lamps and torches in her room were turned on by the servants when the sun had long since reached the horizon, she knew that the discussion in the Senate had to come to an end.

She was about to roll back the parchment and place it on the table when someone knocked on her door.

,,Yes?” she said, but instead of her beloved she only found a servant who bowed and replied, ,,Emperor Geta wishes to see you, he insists that you dine with him. His brother Emperor Caracalla has already been taken care of” the message read.

She sent the servant away with a wave of her hand and rose herself more hastily than she had intended and immediately headed for his chamber, which was only a corridor away.

So Caracalla is sleeping well it flashed through her mind casually as she realized that he had probably taken care of him as well. Geta was once again doing a lot more than he was supposed to, another reason why she loved him so much.

Stopping in front of the large double wooden door, the guards bowed before they opened the door for her and she was finally back with him, ,,Geta dearest I see you again,” she said happily and automatically went to the table where she had expected him to be for dinner but he wasn't there.

Turning around as she heard a sniffle she saw a golden curly head standing on the balcony, he was overlooking the city but ewa san his posture made her falter ,,Geta? Is everything alright?” she asked as she stepped out into the cool night and stood behind him, her fingers carefully resting against his back.

He was tense, trembling slightly but whether it was from the cold or the excitement she couldn't tell, ,,No one...none of these philistines listened, it led to nothing,” he finally said slowly as he turned to face her, the moon shining above him, the cold god watching over God's representation on earth.

The make-up on his face smudged, the golden light clothes wrinkled and not smooth and his blond hair completely disheveled. He did not have the madness of his brother, but as the sole ruler of an empire, such a burden lay heavily on him alone. ,,My husband, you know I couldn't be prouder, don't you?” she asked the superfluous question but knew he needed it.

The next moment he turned to her with a sigh and grasped her hands, she could see the watery eyes even in the faint moonlight, ,,The feelings are the same...but an emperor without his senate only with enemies and no support as it seems...is neither god nor man he is nothing” he finally spoke the truth and embraced her a little more strongly, slightly painfully and yet seeking help.

She understood him, understood him from the bottom of her heart, a pain, a helplessness she knew only too well.

Putting her hand on his cheek and looking at him for a moment, he entangled her in a kiss, she felt his hand at her side running over her hip, ,,Love you” she heard the murmured words as they broke away, as this wonderful fallen god looked at her so full of grace and love.

Her heart was bound with his as the brass rings made a soft muffled sound as their hands met again, the small smile on the god's lips as he looked at his love.

,,You are the most important thing to me and to Caracalla and I as your beloved swear to you that this will not be the end,” she assured him and saw the love that showed in the darkly painted eyes.

She saw him look away at Rome, the city behind him, his home and the empire that belonged to him, saw the nod, heard the intake of breath as he pulled her into another kiss. he may be destitute but he would never lose his family, his love, Geta knew that.

,,We'll show them together," he promised and led her next to him, leaving his hand linked with hers and seeming to promise her not only Rome, but the whole world, because together the imperial family of Rome would be able to do anything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@potatoesenpaii , @thatnerdliv , @scorpiongirlsthings , @pxnx-kk

@the-a-word-2214 , @peakygirl1919 , @k-yurieee

[ohnoitstbskyen]

I deleted the ask, but someone wrote one basically saying "why do you post reaction videos to Helluva Boss? Don't you know the show exploits its workers and they're overworked and get burned out?"

And, I mean, I love your energy, person who asked, definitely hold on to those values and speak up about this. But also, I am afraid I might have some bad news for you about literally the whole entire animation industry.

As near as I can make out from the sparse journalistic reporting that's been done on SpindleHorse -- and as a sidebar, please for the love of god read actual reporting about these things and not just callout posts and fandom discourse -- as near as I can make out, SpindleHorse as a studio is neither all that much better nor all that much worse than basically anywhere else in the industry on their level. It seems like it is (or was? Hazbin Hotel seems to be run differently) a studio mostly run by contracting people on a project-by-project basis, which leads to a crapton of turnover, and a huge need for organizing and onboarding, which according to the reporting I have read, the producers and freelancers have struggled to balance and manage properly, which has negatively impacted a number of the workers.

Top that with the usual catty, clique-based backbiting, sniping and poorly managed conflict resolution that's just kinda endemic in creative environments mostly staffed by twentysomethings and stressed out freelancers, and you have the recipe for a workplace where a lot of people are going to have a great time and feel creatively fulfilled, and a lot of people are going to come away feeling justifiably burnt the fuck out and exploited.

All of this is... not especially unusual for the animation industry, or indeed for any creative industry. Which is not to say that it is good, or that it should be allowed to be normal, or that it shouldn't be reported on and criticized (and please for the love of god support unionization efforts because that's the only thing that will actually address these kinds of systemic problems). It's just to say that if those kinds of issues are the line in the sand you draw where you refuse to engage with a studio's output...

Then, for starters, say goodbye to basically all of anime, because the Japanese animation industry is actively in a state of crisis trying to recruit new talent because its working conditions and pay are so astonishingly abysmal. And the horror stories that escape from that industry make the issues at SpindleHorse look like summer camp at times.

But you also have to say goodbye to a lot of American and European animation. Please do not imagine that Disney and its subcontractors, or that Nickelodeon or Warner Bros, are benevolent employers. They exploit their staff brutally and are currently trying to crush the labor value of animation with threats of generative AI being used to replace jobs. But those corporations also have extremely well-funded PR departments and the ability to silence employees with NDAs and threats of blackballing, so you don't get to hear as many of the horror stories as you might from a smaller independent studio that's less able to silence criticism by holding people's careers hostage.

All of this is to say that 1) it's valid and important to have criticism of both large and small-scale animation studios, and to keep the well-being and happiness of the workers higher in your priorities than the output of Products™.

And 2) if you're going to have a principle for what kinds of problems make a studio's output morally untouchable for you, and what kinds of problems you think should make a studio's output untouchable to other people, you do need to apply that principle consistently to the entire industry, and not just to the independent animation studio that happens to be surrounded by the internet's most inflammatory fandom discourse.

If you don't apply that principle consistently, maybe don't send reproachful messages to strangers scolding them for not living up to your standards, and even if you do apply that principle consistently, maybe still don't do that, because it's mostly quite annoying, and doesn't really do anything to support animation workers struggling for better working conditions.

The Animation Guild in the US is currently in the middle of a bargaining process with their industry, and they have a social media press kit as well as relevant talking points on their website which you can use to post in solidarity with the workers. If it comes to a full industry strike, consider donating to their strike funds to help them maintain pressure. Outside of the US, try and find out what (if any) local unions exist for animation workers, and maybe sign up to their mailing lists. They will let you know what kind of support they need from you.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

The Best Friend Showdown

Season four had many, many flaws. One of the big ones was the Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict where Ladybug starts relying on Alya more and more, basically using her to replace Master Fu. We get a sense that Chat Noir feels inferior to Rena Rouge because of this change, but it’s never directly addressed. The most we get is this conversation from Hack-San:

Ladybug: I'm really sorry, Cat Noir. I should've told you. I mean, if I found out that you told someone about your secret identity, I'd... probably be upset, too. I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings. Cat Noir: You didn't hurt my feelings. You did everything right. 

Which is actually a really weird bit of dialogue because - as far as I can tell - nothing in the episode revealed that Scarabella knew Ladybug's identity. She hands out miraculous all the time and no one knows who she really is. Why would this time be different? Ladybug could just show up in costume, explain what's up, and then hand off the earrings while using yet another miraculous.

Anyway, the Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict is “resolved” by Rena Rouge being outed again (and I guess that matters this time), leading her to give up her miraculous so that Gabriel can’t steal it away, which of course leads Gabriel to steal it away and fully disempower Ladybug’s larger team, leaving Chat Noir her only teammate.

How satisfying! This is such good, character-driven story telling!

It’s not. This is plot contrivances to the max with no meaningful character beats, but we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to do one of my favorite things: gush about a relevant Kim Possible episode! Today’s topic is episode 12 of season one: Pain King vs. Cleopatra, the episode that introduces Kim’s female BFF, Monique!

This was a bit of a shocker for me because I didn’t realize that Kim and Monique weren’t pre-series friends. Turns out that, much like Alya, Monique is a new girl, which isn’t a bad call. This was a nice way to delay Monique’s introduction for a few episodes so that the writers could focus on establishing Kim’s relationship with other key members of the cast like her partner, Ron. Spacing out your intros is the way to go whenever you can pull it off as it’s a kindness to your audience that keeps them from feeling overwhelmed, making it more likely that they’ll remember your cast.

The other, more important similarity between Alya and Monique is that, when Kim’s hero partner and life-long friend finds out about Monique, he is less than thrilled:

Kim: I barely got to see them. Right after I hooked up with Monique, the museum was robbed by some glowing-headed animal guy. Ron: Oh, that's nice. Ron: Wait a minute, who's Monique? Kim New friend, really great. Anyway, the thief stole an enchanted ancient talisman. Ron: Whoa, whoa, back up! How can I not know about a new friend? Kim: I met her at Club Banana, then again at the museum before I chased the glowing robber. Ron: So what's she like? Kim: The robber? Ron: The friend, Kim, the "new friend".

Throughout the episode, Kim and Monique continue to bond without Ron, leaving Ron feeling left out:

Ron: Seein' a pattern here, Rufus: Kim does her thing, I do my thing, and pretty soon - we're doing different things.

Which leads him to get a little territorial:

Kim Ron! What are you doing here? Ron: Can I dine with my best friend and her new friend? Kim: Uuh, Ron, Monique, and vice versa. Ron: Bearclaw? Monique: No, thanks, I'm vegetarian. Ron: Uhm, I'm pretty sure it's imitation bear? Kim: She's joking, Ron. Ron: Good one, hahaha, ha, good one. So, did Kim tell you that I'm her sidekick? Cause that role is definitely taken by me. Monique: Riiiight. Well, in... you know I better get to class. Later, Kim. Um, n-nice meeting you, Ron. Ron: Likewise, I'm sure! Kim: What is your problem? You're acting really weird. Ron: Well, let's see. You went to the museum with Monique, not me. Monique was with you this morning, not me. Hmm, pattern? Kim: Yeah. You. Weird. Ron: No, we're drifting apart because you're excluding me. Kim: I am not excluding you. It's just that you and Monique are... different.

Noticing some similarities to Miraculous here?

So how does Kim Possible resolve this conflict?

Well, the plot of this episode resolves around Kim Possible’s version of professional wrestling, the GWA. There’s a competition going on that Kim has no interest in watching (mood), but when Kim mentions the GWA to Monique:

Monique: Why didn't you bring [Ron] along? Kim: Unless someone put a waiter in a headlock, this is definitely not Ron's scene. Besides, he had a date with "Steel Toe". Monique: He scored tickets to Mayhem in Middleton? The GWA rocks! Kim: What?

It turns out that Monique and Ron have a shared interest! Multiple shared interests, in fact! Interests that Kim does not share:

Monique: You know, I still can't believe you met Pain King and Steel Toe. Ron: I can't believe you're into wrestling. Kim: I can't believe I know either one of you.

By the end of the episode, the conflict is resolved not with Kim having to pick a BFF or with Monique somehow being demoted, but by showing that this didn’t need to be a conflict at all. Kim can have multiple close friends that she shares different interests with without any of those friends being lesser. Those friends can, in turn, have their own friendships that don’t always involve her.

It’s a genuinely lovely resolution that makes me love this little friend group because it now has added complexity. Monique and Ron are friends in their own right! Kim is not the center of the universe in spite of her main character status!

I also love that Kim isn’t vilified for having other friends or portrayed as constantly leaving Ron out of things that he'd want to do in favor of Monique. Ron genuinely would not enjoy most of the things that the girls love to do together. At the same time, Ron’s feeling aren’t treated as totally irrational either and Kim even admits to ditching him. It’s a genuine, complex conflict that is super common when someone enters a new relationship be it platonic or romantic.

Obviously Kim Possible’s version of this conflict feels far less complex than Miraculous’ because Kim Possible understood that Ron should be Kim’s one-and-only partner, so his position was really never threatened. Monique does not want to be an action hero and is never given the sort narrative weight that elevates her to Ron’s level or higher, but that doesn't matter. The basic lesson here is still relevant and super important for the intended audience of both of these shows.

There did not need to be a Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict that never got properly resolved. Miraculous could have made these two friends and no, Scarabella doesn't count because Chat Noir has no idea that Scarabella is Rena Rouge/Furtive. Their relationship ended at the end of Hack-San. He didn't even know that Rena Furtive was a thing until she was in the process of being benched and that's the problem.

Kim Possible is not a team show, Miraculous is, and yet Kim Possible has better team dynamics than Miraculous. Monique could have joined Kim's team at the end of Pain King vs. Cleopatra and it would have felt natural because both Kim and Ron had welcomed Monique and formed a genuine bond with her. This is a true friend group that Miraculous can only dream of even though they've been adding new superheroes since season two.

We're going into a season with a full, massive team and yet that team has no established dynamics on the hero side. It's not a functional team! None of these characters have meaningful relationships with each other as heroes save for Alya and Nino since they know each other’s secret identities. The only relationships Miraculous cares about are the various romances and everyone's relationship to Marinette and everyone suffers for it.

The show would not have been harmed by Rena Rouge, Chat Noir, and Ladybug being a team. It was the thing I kept think after watching the Kim Possible episode. Since the team is the end game, why aren't we seeing them? It would have been so nice to have Hack-San end with Ladybug introducing Chat Noir to Rena Furtive instead of a nonsense discussion about an issue the episode didn't even address.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Shifting $677m from the banks to the people, every year, forever

I'll be in TUCSON, AZ from November 8-10: I'm the GUEST OF HONOR at the TUSCON SCIENCE FICTION CONVENTION.

"Switching costs" are one of the great underappreciated evils in our world: the more it costs you to change from one product or service to another, the worse the vendor, provider, or service you're using today can treat you without risking your business.

Businesses set out to keep switching costs as high as possible. Literally. Mark Zuckerberg's capos send him memos chortling about how Facebook's new photos feature will punish anyone who leaves for a rival service with the loss of all their family photos – meaning Zuck can torment those users for profit and they'll still stick around so long as the abuse is less bad than the loss of all their cherished memories:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2021/08/facebooks-secret-war-switching-costs

It's often hard to quantify switching costs. We can tell when they're high, say, if your landlord ties your internet service to your lease (splitting the profits with a shitty ISP that overcharges and underdelivers), the switching cost of getting a new internet provider is the cost of moving house. We can tell when they're low, too: you can switch from one podcatcher program to another just by exporting your list of subscriptions from the old one and importing it into the new one:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/10/16/keep-it-really-simple-stupid/#read-receipts-are-you-kidding-me-seriously-fuck-that-noise

But sometimes, economists can get a rough idea of the dollar value of high switching costs. For example, a group of economists working for the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau calculated that the hassle of changing banks is costing Americans at least $677m per year (see page 526):

https://files.consumerfinance.gov/f/documents/cfpb_personal-financial-data-rights-final-rule_2024-10.pdf

The CFPB economists used a very conservative methodology, so the number is likely higher, but let's stick with that figure for now. The switching costs of changing banks – determining which bank has the best deal for you, then transfering over your account histories, cards, payees, and automated bill payments – are costing everyday Americans more than half a billion dollars, every year.

Now, the CFPB wasn't gathering this data just to make you mad. They wanted to do something about all this money – to find a way to lower switching costs, and, in so doing, transfer all that money from bank shareholders and executives to the American public.

And that's just what they did. A newly finalized Personal Financial Data Rights rule will allow you to authorize third parties – other banks, comparison shopping sites, brokers, anyone who offers you a better deal, or help you find one – to request your account data from your bank. Your bank will be required to provide that data.

I loved this rule when they first proposed it:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/06/10/getting-things-done/#deliverism

And I like the final rule even better. They've really nailed this one, even down to the fine-grained details where interop wonks like me get very deep into the weeds. For example, a thorny problem with interop rules like this one is "who gets to decide how the interoperability works?" Where will the data-formats come from? How will we know they're fit for purpose?

This is a super-hard problem. If we put the monopolies whose power we're trying to undermine in charge of this, they can easily cheat by delivering data in uselessly obfuscated formats. For example, when I used California's privacy law to force Mailchimp to provide list of all the mailing lists I've been signed up for without my permission, they sent me thousands of folders containing more than 5,900 spreadsheets listing their internal serial numbers for the lists I'm on, with no way to find out what these lists are called or how to get off of them:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/07/22/degoogled/#kafka-as-a-service

So if we're not going to let the companies decide on data formats, who should be in charge of this? One possibility is to require the use of a standard, but again, which standard? We can ask a standards body to make a new standard, which they're often very good at, but not when the stakes are high like this. Standards bodies are very weak institutions that large companies are very good at capturing:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/30/weak-institutions/

Here's how the CFPB solved this: they listed out the characteristics of a good standards body, listed out the data types that the standard would have to encompass, and then told banks that so long as they used a standard from a good standards body that covered all the data-types, they'd be in the clear.

Once the rule is in effect, you'll be able to go to a comparison shopping site and authorize it to go to your bank for your transaction history, and then tell you which bank – out of all the banks in America – will pay you the most for your deposits and charge you the least for your debts. Then, after you open a new account, you can authorize the new bank to go back to your old bank and get all your data: payees, scheduled payments, payment history, all of it. Switching banks will be as easy as switching mobile phone carriers – just a few clicks and a few minutes' work to get your old number working on a phone with a new provider.

This will save Americans at least $677 million, every year. Which is to say, it will cost the banks at least $670 million every year.

Naturally, America's largest banks are suing to block the rule:

https://www.americanbanker.com/news/cfpbs-open-banking-rule-faces-suit-from-bank-policy-institute

Of course, the banks claim that they're only suing to protect you, and the $677m annual transfer from their investors to the public has nothing to do with it. The banks claim to be worried about bank-fraud, which is a real thing that we should be worried about. They say that an interoperability rule could make it easier for scammers to get at your data and even transfer your account to a sleazy fly-by-night operation without your consent. This is also true!

It is obviously true that a bad interop rule would be bad. But it doesn't follow that every interop rule is bad, or that it's impossible to make a good one. The CFPB has made a very good one.

For starters, you can't just authorize anyone to get your data. Eligible third parties have to meet stringent criteria and vetting. These third parties are only allowed to ask for the narrowest slice of your data needed to perform the task you've set for them. They aren't allowed to use that data for anything else, and as soon as they've finished, they must delete your data. You can also revoke their access to your data at any time, for any reason, with one click – none of this "call a customer service rep and wait on hold" nonsense.

What's more, if your bank has any doubts about a request for your data, they are empowered to (temporarily) refuse to provide it, until they confirm with you that everything is on the up-and-up.

I wrote about the lawsuit this week for @eff@mastodon.social's Deeplinks blog:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2024/10/no-matter-what-bank-says-its-your-money-your-data-and-your-choice

In that article, I point out the tedious, obvious ruses of securitywashing and privacywashing, where a company insists that its most abusive, exploitative, invasive conduct can't be challenged because that would expose their customers to security and privacy risks. This is such bullshit.

It's bullshit when printer companies say they can't let you use third party ink – for your own good:

https://arstechnica.com/gadgets/2024/01/hp-ceo-blocking-third-party-ink-from-printers-fights-viruses/

It's bullshit when car companies say they can't let you use third party mechanics – for your own good:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/03/rip-david-graeber/#rolling-surveillance-platforms

It's bullshit when Apple says they can't let you use third party app stores – for your own good:

https://www.eff.org/document/letter-bruce-schneier-senate-judiciary-regarding-app-store-security

It's bullshit when Facebook says you can't independently monitor the paid disinformation in your feed – for your own good:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/08/05/comprehensive-sex-ed/#quis-custodiet-ipsos-zuck

And it's bullshit when the banks say you can't change to a bank that charges you less, and pays you more – for your own good.

CFPB boss Rohit Chopra is part of a cohort of Biden enforcers who've hit upon a devastatingly effective tactic for fighting corporate power: they read the law and found out what they're allowed to do, and then did it:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/23/getting-stuff-done/#praxis

The CFPB was created in 2010 with the passage of the Consumer Financial Protection Act, which specifically empowers the CFPB to make this kind of data-sharing rule. Back when the CFPA was in Congress, the banks howled about this rule, whining that they were being forced to share their data with their competitors.

But your account data isn't your bank's data. It's your data. And the CFPB is gonna let you have it, and they're gonna save you and your fellow Americans at least $677m/year – forever.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/11/01/bankshot/#personal-financial-data-rights

[one-time-i-dreamt]

not a dream

the Fantastic Four movies lore is crazy because

what do you mean there's a Fantastic Four movie from 1994 that was finished but never released?

and copies of it were leaked online so some people got to watch it

and the whole reason the film was made (and very low budget at that) was to allow for Bernd Eichinger, the owner of the rights to the films, to get to keep the rights?

and then we got the 2004 version (superior to all)

which was not well-accepted by critics BUT I LOVED IT and it was a box office hit, and spawned a sequel (Silver Surfer 2007) that was panned even worse

but I also liked it (albeit less) and this cast was just so good

and since then every 10 years the film series has been rebooted (1994 - B-movie, 2005 - big budget movie, 2015 - reboot, 2025 - new reboot)

the 2015 cast just didn't have that chemistry that the 2005 cast did in my opinion and the movie was just bad to me

BUT THE CAST WAS AMAZING and they could have done a whole other Fantastic Four story with them but they chose to rehash the same ole origin story that we've already seen so of course that didn't work which is too bad because this was a waste of great cast

and now a new reboot was announced for 2025, The Fantastic Four: First steps, starring Pedro Pascal, Vanessa Kirby, Joseph Quinn, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Julia Garner, Ralph Ineson

which, again, AMAZING CAST

and Marvel Studios said they wanted to tell a new story with the characters rather than retell their origin story, WHICH YES, finally

but then I'm looking at the cast and the roles they play and I see Silver Surfer and Galactus and...

I'm just really hoping it's not a repeat of the 2007 Silver Surfer sequel

Either way, I'm looking forward to another reboot in 2035 because they've been pretty consistent with rebooting the series every 10 years lol

[warrioreowynofrohan]

Starting a reread of Pride and Prejudice and keeping an eye out for some things that have been mentioned by the Austen fandom:

1) The Bennets do not seem so notably wealthy – by gentry standards – as has been suggested by parts of the fandom, nor does Mr. Bennet in particular seem so blameable in not having saved a more substantial inheritance for his daughters.

The Bennets have two thousand a year for 7 people. This is, IIRC, a little over twice per person what the Dashwoods have in Sense & Sensibility (500 pounds a year for four people), and the Dashwoods are very much at the low end of the gentry. It’s about half what is considered a notably rich member of the gentry in this book or others (five thousand a year, like Mr. Bingley has, or four thousand a year which is, I think, what Henry Crawford has).

Also, it seems like Mr. Bennet is impeded in his management of the estate by Mrs. Bennet, from this line from Mr. Bennet (when Mrs. Bennet is urging him to use the pretext of the horses being needed for the farm to not send Jane to Netherfield in the carriage, so she will be obliged to stay overnight if it rains): “They [the horses] are wanted in the farm much oftener than I can get them.” Combined with the early narratorial statement that the solace of Mrs. Bennet’s life is “visiting and news”, this suggests conflicts between her using the horses for visiting purposes and the needs of the horses for the farm. (Though I wouldn’t have expected carriage-horses to overlap with farm work much.)

Mr. Bennet feels less like someone who is by inclination negligent, and more like someone who has, over 20+ years, grown tired of re-fighting the same battles over and over with his wife (who is incapable of absorbing any idea that is counter to her own inclinations), and largely given up. He baits his wife, but he does do some necessary things promptly: after insisting to his wife that he will not visit Mr. Bingley, he is in fact “among the earliest” to do so.

I see Mr. Bennet not as an unsympathetic character, but as the “failure state” of both Elizabeth and, in a lesser way, Darcy: this is who you become if you have no one close to you whom you respect as a peer. (Darcy wouldn’t be as openly mocking, but his interactions with Miss Bingley when Elizabeth is at Netherfield – brief and curt – give a flavour of what he’s like around someone he’s close to who is bothering him.) Elizabeth likes her father; he visits her regularly after her marriage and there’s no indication either her or Darcy mind; but his life isn’t the future we want for Elizabeth. Nor is it the future he wants for Elizabeth, as we see with his response to both Mr. Collins’ proposal and Elizabeth’s telling him of her engagement to Darcy.

2) I’m noticing the connections between Elizabeth’s and Darcy’s early conversations more this time. For example, on one evening at Netherfield they debate whether a plable temper (Bingley’s) isca good bad thing, with Elizabeth saying that being easily convinced by your friends of matters of no great import, based on your affection for them, is amiable. In a later conversation at Netherfield, Darcy says (in comment on his non-mockable faults): “My temper I dare not vouch for. – It is I believe too little yielding – certainly too little for the convenience of the world…My feelings are not puffed about with every attempt to move them.” This feels like a response to what Elizabeth was saying earlier, meaning their conversation (in contrast to Miss Bingley’s mix of flattering him and twitting him about Elizabeth, it is one where he’s being argued with; he seems to prefer that) has stuck in his head.

On a funnier note, the earlier conversation had Darcy condemning humblebrags (“Nothing is more deceitful than the appearance of humility. It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect boast”), but I suspect that he’s engaging in it here, and actually prides himself on his resoluteness.

3) While Miss Bingley isn’t a villainness, she’s certainly an unpleasant person. She’s mean, she’s two-faced (mocking her “friend’s” relatives behind her back while her “friend” is sick, though being usually kind and courteous to her face), and she doesn’t have enough sense or perception to pick up on when her flattery towards Darcy and her insults towards Elizabeth are annoying Darcy.

4) Elizabeth gives very little indication of being a bookworm (nor a tomboy), in contrast to some characterizations. Even in the scene where her reading is mentioned, she is in fact largely ignoring the book in favour of paying attention to the conversation at the card table; she picked up the book more out of prudence (the card game is gambling and she guesses they are betting too much for her means) than intrinsic interest. In two other scenes at Netherfield – during the few times she is not tending to Jane – she is doing needlework. Her muddy walk to Netherfield is inspired by affection for Jane and desire not to use the carriage needlessly, not by a love of muddy walks.

5) Despite some posts I’ve seen on use of Lizzy vs Eliza as nicknames for Elizabeth Bennet (Lizzie is more common), both Charlotte Lucas and Miss Bingley do refer to her as Eliza at some points.

[tashism]

‎𐂐⋆.˚ ´- please. you guys know i don’t write like this please please please give me grace. okay loaf you

THE REVIEW – chef!patrick x reader

“i mean, who the fuck do they think they are?!”

you’d known patrick could get… passionate about things like this. it’s been two weeks since the whole great-cat-escape of apartment 6A, and the guy has just about embedded himself in every part of your routine. he knows when you get home, he knows when you wake up, when you go to sleep, when you’re in the shower, when you smoke your last cigarette of the night. on the rare occasion he’s back at his place before you’re back at yours, he’s fucking itching for you to get home.

but this new found ‘romance’ is besides the point.

since he’s gotten into your apartment he hasn’t shut up about some mystery review that baker friend sent him. “east village’s notoriously unimaginative ‘chef’ patrick zweig has left me less than stunned after three courses. again.” now, that’s what got him. it wasn’t the reference to his not-so-orthodox path to cooking, not the jabs at his failed pop-up attempts in brooklyn — no, it was the fact that they didn’t like his steak tartar.

“it’s classic, you don’t fuck with classic!” he laughs bitterly, stalking behind you as you clean up the kitchen. “you had the same thing they did the other day, the same exact thing, and you said it was amazing!” you can’t help but pray the sink starts to drown him out at some point. “classic’s boring, patrick, you know that. no one’s looking for more wagyu, or whatever you use-”

“it’s like if i came here tonight, ate the chicken, smiled in your face, and texted someone about how dry it was- and on top of that, compared you to art!”

“you’re saying my chicken was dry?”

“i’m saying it’s rude.” patrick stands behind you while you scrub at the admittedly dry bits of chicken stuck to your cast iron, his hands mindlessly boxing you in against the counter. he leans his forehead down on your shoulder, an all-too-exasperated sigh leaving him. ���and what does art have to do with this?” you mutter, shrugging him off of you.

“nothing, i just…” he stands up straight, leaning against the counter behind you. “i can’t fucking escape her. everywhere i look, it’s her, i have to be as good as her. it makes no sense, it always comes back to her…” the silence that stretches between you two after that is nauseating, the only thing breaking it up being the sound of running water and clanking dishes.

her. this unknown evil, a constant, nagging entity who constantly leaves him ten steps behind. but as soon as the silence starts, it’s over, a sharp inhale breaking the barrier between you two.

“it was bad, baby.” he laughs, turning around and scurrying to the living room to grab your laptop. “i mean, you have to read this thing-”

“it’s dead.” you shout from the kitchen, drying the soapy water from your hands and following closely behind him, grabbing at the computer the second he opens it. your favorite thing about this ‘relationship’? you both have a knack for dismissing shit. even if it’s getting hard to, he bites, his hands dropping to his sides with a suspicious silence.

close. too close.