#I mean it's more accurate for you guys anyways
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Hiii, I’m currently revamping some of our old pride animal designs :-] i’ll post the LGBTNRD soon! Lots of animals to draw
#i finished this guy but I guess it would be more interesting to post as a set#Call it Gen 2 I guess lol#or Gen 5 to be more accurate#No the canvases wont be similar sizes so. sorry#anyway this is Aro Axolotl :-]#nextbis Lesbian Frog. but if you guys want to see Lesbian Snake i can do that first and Frog in the future#After that is Bisexual Cat (unless you want a squirrel)#Gay Dikdik. Transgender Otter. Rainbow Giraffe. and then Nonbinary Cat#And lastly the Disability Pride Zebra yayyy#sorry if this means that requests might not come back for a while#we just have a big backlog of pride animals to go through now!#the most we’ll probably consider is if its a flag we haven’t done yet or if its too popular of a demand to make a new animal#as for the Lesbian flags i’m really excited to start because. um. the current designs are using the old flag and i dont like that#Started with the aro axolotl bc it was one of the most popular designs we ever had#ebonytailsart#pride animals#also the LGBTNRD is a joke . please
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so this post may be controversial but i will no longer be silenced. i need people to start being accepting of bears/fat men in general that don't fit into the "dad" vibe or aren't conventionally attractive. quit acting like they've all gotta be incels/mladys/neckbeards/racist weebs etc. because first off, fat hairy nerdy men with patchy beards and glasses or acne or bald spots or whatever are HOT and i'm tired of pretending they're not!!!!!! and more importantly!!! even if you aren't attracted to them (or even if you are) i need you to start being fucking normal about them. because if you keep treating every fat hairy guy with glasses as if he's this rampant bigot, you're just gonna create more divides, and also you're a fucking asshole who equates looks with morality. something something alt-right pipeline, someone's worth is not determined by how attractive you find them, etc. please stop being fatphobic to ppl you don't like lol
#💙 cass#fatphobia#i am SO serious i think the archetype of 'fat incel with glasses and a patchy beard and lives in his mom's basement'#regardless of whether or not it's accurate (often isn't)#is like. Am i supposed to not find that attractive. I love nerdy lookin guys. They're hot!!!!#Glasses are hot! Stubble is hot! Fatness is hot!!!! like why are you trying to say they aren't. i have working eyes???#I mean i don't like incels but this ain't about that it's about yalls rampant anti-masculism and fatphobia. Lol#i hate how we've made it seem like you can't actually find fat guys attractive. WHat's up with that btw#like even in gay spaces when you say 'i love bears' theres a really specific kind of guy that ppl associate with being a bear#hell i don't even always want to say bear. I want to say that i like fat guys in general#because i just really do!!!! i don't get why this is an issue#again that's only half of the point i'm making here. i'm also saying you need to be normal about people you don't find attractive#and ESPECIALLY when it comes to yalls internalized fatphobia. damn. reflect on that! thanks#that part is way more important but just. i feel like i never see anyone actually expressing attraction to fat guys#which is CRIMINAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#again probably because we've created this idea that no one could Ever find a fat person attractive. societal fatphobia etc#but anyway. the way i would die for a trans bear with glasses.................
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Hirano to Kagiura light novel translation 2-4
Chapter 2: Summer preparations.
Part 4
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Basketball club practice is held inside the gym for the most part, but they use the outdoor space for warm-up runs.
They can hear the wind instruments club tuning and practicing marches, and it feels like they have their own personal pep band.
Although they keep hydrated, warm sweat flows freely.
While squinting against the blazing sunlight, Kagiura thinks of Hirano’s bright blonde hair.
Dyed blonde despite his position in the student council, Hirano’s hair is unfortunately quite damaged. It suits him so well, though.
And the small earrings that normally adorn his earlobes are as of yet still missing in action.
Although it’s already been a week, Hirano seems unconcerned; as such, Kagiura is the more worried of the two.
If the piercings are healthy, they won’t easily close up, but they’re still technically wounds, so they’ll undoubtedly shrink if left unattended.
Hirano had told him they’re his first piercings, so Kagiura had asked “shouldn’t you hurry up and put something in them?”, to which Hirano had replied, “If I took them out at the same time, I should find them sooner or later”, and seemed content to leave well enough alone.
While he took shelter in the gym, mopping his sweaty face with the towel hanging around his neck, Kagiura thought about what color earrings would look good on Hirano.
His image of Hirano’s personal clothing is vague, since he only sees him in loungewear.
He would be able to see them on the weekend, but Kagiura’s days off are dedicated to club activities, so his chances to see him are few and far between.
At school, when he’s wearing his uniform, most of the time they don’t end up running into each other. In the mornings, Hirano wakes up first and even wakes Kagiura up, but even Hirano wouldn’t wear his uniform that early in the morning.
He returns to the dorm earlier than Kagiura, and by the time Kagiura gets home, he has long since changed into loungewear.
That’s why going the traditional route of choosing ones that will easily coordinate with his usual clothing is easier said than done.
Besides, we don’t have any free time before summer vacation to go buy some together.
So what is he supposed to do?
Kagiura tried to figure out where to go from there, but before long, the rest of the club members finished their run and foundational practice began.
If your head is in the clouds, it won’t be long before you get injured.
He had taken that concept to heart, so it only took a moment for him to switch gears and focus on practice.
It’s strange; when he gets in the zone, he doesn’t even care about getting sweaty. He can’t even tell if the wind instrument club’s performance is still audible from outside, through the gym doors that are closed to conserve their pathetically weak air conditioning.
The application review for the plan selection qualifiers went by without a hitch, and they passed through the second round of judging immediately afterwards with flying colors.
Niibashi is doing just as well as anticipated—in fact, he is going above and beyond. The presentation he gives with a smile brimming with confidence is overwhelmingly effective, and his preparation is immaculate.
They deliberately address the open question of food safety measures, and are now at the stage where they’ll probably be able to get a space in the courtyard or somewhere else that can accommodate their customers.
They were able to get through the research in just a few days thanks to their 2nd and 3rd year acquaintances, so they’re grateful.
Normally, upperclassmen make good use of their past experiences and prepare for the cultural festival ahead of time. That’s why it’s difficult for ill-prepared first years to win real estate in the courtyard, or so they’re told, but they faced their audition with such flawlessness that it was hard to believe they had completed it in such a rush.
Niibashi is excessively skilled at networking, so their stock of materials piles up with the help of other classes, and just like that Kagiura and the other two assistants take a back seat.
In contrast to the energy of the executive committees from the other classes with passionate appeals, the student council, who are in charge of the judging, are, to put it nicely, relaxed.
To put it not so nicely, their reactions are deadpanned, by which Kagiura was caught off guard.
One would think that the student council at a school where independence is so highly valued would be filled with the type of people who like planning things, but the student council president, Touou, seems to be the high-strung type.
As expected from someone who serves as the student council president as a second year, he’s used to directing others, and he even has a certain dignity about him as he subjects each proposal to a barrage of questions from on high, yet he doesn’t seem to enjoy doing so.
There was one other thing that was unexpected.
Which is that, the sometimes excessive amounts of nitpicking by the latter notwithstanding, Niibashi is actively involved with Touou.
I wonder if they’re good friends? Kagiura wonders, but he wouldn’t want to put a damper on them when they seemed to be enjoying themselves, so he bites his tongue.
*****
It isn’t long before summer vacation, so there were only morning classes today.
The gym is undergoing inspections and can’t be used, and the advisors are absent for training, so the coaches are also taking the day off, which means the basketball club isn’t meeting today.
That’s just fine by them, as it gives the first year club members the chance to go to a sports shop to purchase new shoes, which Kagiura, as a veteran, is happy to give recommendations for.
This shop is familiar with their school placing orders for uniforms, and they’re glad that the proprietor memorizes their faces and supports them even though they’re still just first years. Apparently he’s even come to see their practice matches.
His heart bounces on his way home, thinking he’ll ask Hirano about it too.
Despite eating lunch and going shopping, he still gets back much earlier than usual, and it’s not yet 3 o’clock. Even if he does his homework, time is just crawling by today.
“I’m home!”
There’s no response to his statement as he swings the door open.
“Huh…?”
Inside, Hirano’s bag is missing, as if he hasn’t come home yet.
Maybe he’s at a committee meeting, he thinks while he spreads a sheet out on the floor and begins tending to his club equipment.
After more or less cleaning up, he starts on his homework, imitating the self-study techniques Hirano had taught him.
If he could see this, would he be surprised?
But, contrary to his expectations, even when dusk falls there’s no sign of Hirano coming back.
Starting to get antsy, he opens the door to their room open halfway, but Hanzawa comes by and shuts it, saying “if you leave the door hanging open, it’ll be in the way!”
He’s on the same committee, which means it’s not a late-running meeting that’s holding Hirano up.
“Hanzawa-san, Hirano-san isn’t back yet—did he tell you he had something to take care of, or something?”
“Hm. I have no idea. Well, you’re not a child, so you’ll be fine. That aside, aren’t you going to go for dinner? I’m heading there now.”
Just as he’s said, dinnertime has indeed started. Although there’s a large window when you can go, you can never be too early if you don’t want to impact your bathing time.
“.....I’m coming.”
I really, really hope nothing’s wrong.
Slightly troubled, Kagiura follows behind Hanzawa.
Apparently, Hirano returned to the dorms just before dinnertime ended.
He went straight to the dining hall without even dropping off his bag, and didn’t come back to the room until after the first years’ bath time had started.
They kept just missing each other, and could say no more than passing greetings, but Hirano seemed to be in a bit of a bad mood.
He has always been the kind of person to speak brusquely, but it is rare for him to be so blatantly terse. I want to ask him about it, but would that be okay? What if it’s something serious that he can’t talk to me about?
He has a completely different set of problems from his comrade, because the depth of their lives are different by one year, a difference he can sense each and every day.
If Hirano has a problem he can’t resolve, there’s probably nothing Kagiura can do to help. If he asks him if anything happened, it might just make him even more upset.
But—he can’t just do nothing. That is the conclusion Kagiura came to.
While wondering how best to broach the subject, Kagiura leaves the bath, and hurries back to the room.
When he knocks lightly on the door and says “I’m back from the baths,” Hirano replies “yeah, welcome back,” in a lower tone than usual.
Hirano sits at his desk, the look in his eyes predictably sharp.
“What happened today?” Kagiura asks, although for a moment he almost folds under the pressure of that gaze.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You came home late today, Hirano-san. And it doesn’t seem like it was because of a committee meeting.”
“Oh…sorry. Did I worry you?”
“Yes. I was really worried.”
That’s right, he’s worried. He only realized it when Hirano said it.
The feeling of uneasiness that had been plaguing him all afternoon was an awful lot like the loneliness of being left home alone as a child.
Like the feelings he’d had when it seemed like he’d be swallowed up by the swirling anxiety at the thought that something must be something wrong with his parents, or something terrible had happened to his siblings, for them to not come home like this.
“I see. …..It’s not exactly a cheery story, though.”
“That’s okay.”
“There was a fight—or rather an incident of violence—at the school today. It was one-sided; the guys were playing dirty.”
A kouhai from the committee tried to get them to stop, but Hirano’s friend held him back, stepping in in his place, and sustained injuries.
Apparently the reason Hirano had been late is that after asking about the incident from his friend in the committee room, and then hearing what the first year victim and his kouhai had to say about it, he’d been discussing it with the committee advisor.
Hanzawa hadn’t known about it because the advisor had stopped Hirano from calling him back from the dorm even though he was the vice chairman.
“Do you not know who did it? I’m sure they’d be suspended or something…”
“The guy who stepped in to stop it isn’t that great at fighting, so the culprits were able to get away. He knew that they’re first years, but it’ll be summer break soon, so I don’t really know what’ll happen. …He won’t even tell me all the details, either. He probably thinks it’d be lame to snitch or something.”
The longer he talks, the more it seems like he’s just going off on his friend. But rather than being angry at him, it seems more like there’s something else spurring him on. Regret, perhaps, or frustration.
Imagining the pain of someone he’s supposed to be close with refusing to talk to him, Kagiura gently reaches out his hand.
He strokes that beautiful blonde hair.
Although their usual roles are reversed, this is essentially what Hirano always does for him.
Listening to him talk, comforting him, encouraging him. Hirano does it more skillfully, but for Kagiura as he is now, he doesn’t have the words to nurse his indignation.
As he smoothes down his hair, Hirano’s eyes go wide.
“.....What.”
“I thought if I did this maybe you’d calm down.”
“.....”
Letting out a small huff, Hirano murmurs, “you’re right.” The tension slowly drains from his face..
He makes such soft expressions.
Now it’s Kagiura’s turn to be surprised. Hirano’s just like a cat that’s warmed up to him.
“Hey. How long do you plan on rubbing my head?”
No sooner had he spoken than Kagiura pulled his hand back, but even after Hirano leaves for the baths, Kagiura flops onto his bed and ponders how comfortable it felt to stroke that blonde hair.
Twenty minutes later, Hirano returns from the bath, having washed away his sweat and his air of gloom.
Having sat at his desk and pulled out a map of the school, he says, “I’ll do what I can to get this taken care of before summer break,” his usual vigor restored. He’s not sulking at all. He’s back to his normal self.
When Kagiura asks about it upon his return from the bath, Hirano tells him that after discussing with Hanzawa, they’d decided on a plan of action moving forward. It seems the best thing to do is to check out the vicinity the perpetrators had been walking in, and ask the clubs and groups that use that area at the time of the incident for eyewitness statements to try to deduce the culprits.
Putting out a notice aimed at students in clubs seemed unlikely to succeed, but the thought was that if anyone had been acting strangely after the fight, someone might’ve noticed.
After that, with not only Hanzawa but the collective force of the whole disciplinary committee to gather intel and the support of the faculty advisor, they were able to suss out the culprits before summer break.
The school decided to take disciplinary action against them, due to their maliciousness and the fact that there was a second assault.
Just as Hirano had declared, it was just in time for summer break.
Upon returning to his room after chatting with the club senpai who were also dorm students, Kagiura finds that Hirano had already finished getting ready for bed and turned off his desk lamp. It is unusual for him to try to go to sleep early without studying or reading.
Kagiura follows his lead and softly crawls into bed.
Normal classes end tomorrow. The day after that is the closing ceremony.
The basketball club has practice for the weekend practice matches, so Kagiura won’t have the chance to see Hirano, who’s going home immediately, until the new semester.
As his awareness of this fact sinks in, so does his loneliness.
He didn’t sign up for the mock exam, but his week is full of morning make-up classes, so there’s just no way to swing it.
I never thought I’d come to feel like this.
He’s become fond of that flashy personality that caught him off guard at first.
But that was really just the beginning. Things like moving his slippers out of the way for him, eating the peppers off his plate—he was touched by the kindness Hirano had shown him throughout those days.
Being with his side, more than he would’ve expected from living with someone who isn’t family, is comfortable.
“Hey, Hirano-san.”
“Hm?”
“You’re going home the day after the closing ceremony, huh?”
“Yeah, that’s the plan. You’re staying until next week, right? Practice matches and whatnot.”
“Yep. Besides, I also have supplementary lessons this week.”
“You’re actually gonna go? Good for you.”
To tell the truth, he’s actually a little unsure about that.
His grades aren’t exactly something to write home about, but he’d made a rebound at the end of the term, and managed not to get such crappy scores that he’d be forced to take the supplementary lessons.
If he can go, he probably should, but due to club activities he might be exempted.
After checking the prerequisites, he’d declared his plans to attend, because he foresaw putting it off until the end due to a combination of his own personality and being lulled into a false sense of security by the words “you don’t have to attend if you don’t want to”.
Up to now, he’s accepted his senpai’s help, and so far hasn’t let him down…within reason.
“Because it looks like they’ll even be able to teach me how to do the homework we got assigned for summer break. You’ve never been called to attend, have you?”
“Nope, because I take school seriously.”
“Speak for yourself…”
“Haha. You take it seriously too, I bet, and you’ll keep it up in the second semester.”
“Right. …..Um, Hirano-san.”
It’s not as if he’s about to say something weird, but his heart thuds against his chest, and for no real reason, his fists clench atop the bed.
“Hirano-san, do you have any plans for summer break yet? Like around the end of July, or the beginning of August.”
His voice is hesitant, as if he’d confessed to doing something bad.
“Nothing set in stone. Why?”
“What do you think about coming with me to the countryside?”
“Hm? You mean…me tagging along when you go visit your family?”
His questioning reply is slow and tinged with sleepiness.
He hasn’t said no yet, so Kagiura remains hopeful.
“Yeah.”
“.....Your place isn’t really that far in the countryside, is it?”
Hirano’s and Kagiura’s homes are in the same prefecture, and furthermore, they’re right above a transit station. Ignoring the distance between the station and their houses, their respective stations are a 30 minute ride from each other. They’re both familiar with the area.
“Not there, to my grandparents’ house…is that not gonna work out? It’s a huge house and there’s a ton of rooms, so it won’t be cramped, and every year my relatives end up bringing other people anyway, so you wouldn’t be out of place or anything.”
The words had spilled out of his mouth unchecked, but what he said is true. His cousins in university bring along their circle of friends, and more distant relatives with small children come to stay with someone who has a close connection with the main family, so during summer break his grandfather’s house hosts a wide variety of guests.
“.....What days are you going, Kagi-kun?”
“I’m taking the night bus on the 30th, arriving on the 31st, then I’m thinking I’ll stay two or three days and take the night bus back home.”
Up until last year, he’s come with his immediate family, so they’ve usually stayed a bit longer. But for Hirano to come along, he figures this span of time is an easier ask.
He doesn’t want to push back the dates if it can be helped.
There’s a reason it must be this timing.
If Hirano has a prior commitment with this timing in mind, Kagiura will have to give up, but—
“If your relatives give permission, it’s fine by me. I don’t have summer classes around then.”
At the readily given agreement, Kagiura quickly sits up. His phone is charging on his desk.
“Hey, you’re not trying to call them right now, are you?”
“Whaaat, I can’t?”
“You definitely can’t. Do it tomorrow. Look at the clock; it’s almost time for lights out. We’re not allowed to use phones or other devices now.”
Because Hirano himself doesn’t usually follow this policy to the letter, Kagiura immediately understands that cutting off their device time is for Kagiura’s sake.
That sort of thing is what makes him such a good person.
“Fiiine. …Good night, Hirano-san.”
“Yeah. ‘Night, Kagi-kun.”
With the click of the switch being flipped, all the lights shut off.
As the room falls to darkness, the waves of unbelievable nervousness and elation begin to ebb, and before long Kagiura falls asleep.
*****
On the first night of summer vacation, for the first time since he’d started school, Kagiura greeted the night alone.
The two-person room is spacious for one person by himself.
Thanks to the departed Hirano, who’d cleaned thoroughly while Kagiura was at school, even the air in the room had seemed different when he opened the door.
In fact, just by Hirano, who is always there before him, being gone, it feels like everything from the atmosphere to the scent of the room has changed.
Homes are living things, so without people living there they fall apart, or so Kagiura has heard.
He is also hoping that with the number of guests increasing during summer break, that countryside house with many extra rooms will become lively, just as his grandfather said.
Up until now, he hadn’t had words to put to the feeling, but now it feels like he understands what it means to start your own family after leaving your parents’ home.
It just doesn’t feel right if someone isn’t here.
And being with someone is better than being alone.
*****
After talking to his parents and grandfather, Kagiura was given permission to bring his senpai from school home without any issues.
He has yet to tell Hirano anything more than that, but it seems like today they’ll have the opportunity to talk about it.
That night, during the time when phone calls are allowed in the dorm, Kagiura tries bringing up the topic while talking with Hirano.
“By the way, Hirano-san. My relatives said that since you’re my dorm roommate and I’ve probably gotten used to you, it’d be fine for you to stay a week or even two.”
“That’s way too long. And what does ‘used to me’ even mean?”
“I don’t know, either. …..As a matter of fact, we do have guests that stay around a week.”
“I’m grateful to your relatives, but that’s a long time.”
Hirano’s voice as he stifles a laugh is lower over the phone than his natural voice. The husky sound jumps a bit; it’s the first time Kagiura’s heard this voice.
“Are you busy with summer prep courses?”
“Well, I’m finished for tonight, so not really. What about you? Doing okay?”
“Club is going really well, of course. I want to go swimming since it’s so hot, though.”
“Not that, your supplementary classes. You’re going to them and doing the assignments properly, right?”
“I’m doing them. …..There’s a range of topics designated for each day, so I’d be in trouble if I didn’t do them.”
The teacher in charge of the supplementary classes claimed that the majority of students who say they “can’t study” are simply not in the habit of sitting at their desks, rather than having a large difference in their basic academic ability.
He’s not entirely wrong, Kagiura concedes. Because, after all, every time he sits at his desk, he finds himself watching Hirano’s back as he studies or after he’s finished his homework.
If he hadn’t been observing Hirano’s day-to-day life, he probably would’ve said something like “we’re just built different” and not thought anything of it, but thanks to Hirano, he can see the difference between himself and someone who continually puts in effort each day.
“That’s for the best when you’re in your first year. You’ll get more points by reviewing the material from the first semester than by choosing units based on trend.”
Due to the large difference in their characters, Kagiura is skeptical of the theory that if he seriously worked hard, his scores would rise accordingly, but Hirano, who is always studying much more difficult subjects than Kagiura, is sparing him some effort. He has no choice but to do it.
“.....Yeah. I’ll do my best. But, you know…” Although his voice is already subdued so as not to carry into the hallway, Kagiura drops his voice even lower.
“But, what?”
“Our room feels kind of empty when you’re not here.”
When the little huff of laughter reaches his ears, he closes his eyes, unable to stand the way it tickles as if the breath had brushed him directly.
“You must be getting tired. Go to sleep already.”
He wants to protest that he’s not at the age when sleepiness makes him needy, but just as Hirano pointed out, exhaustion is beginning to weigh on him.
I want to fall asleep just like this, without hanging up.
Even though he knows that’s impossible, he almost blurted it out.
I want to see him soon.
*****
T/N: (1) The phrase here is actually 親の実家, but this concept doesn't really translate well into English, so I figured grandparents' house conveyed the meaning best. Basically, in traditional families, the 実家 (true home) is the main house (think Akito's house in Fruits Basket) where the grandparents still live and the extended family gathers for events. This tells us 2 things: 1, that Kagiura's family's probably loaded, and 2, they're traditional, so if he and Hirano ever actually start dating (lol), we can expect some juicy family drama
(2) Full disclosure, Kagi's super cheesy/romantic line at the end is more literally "When you're not here, this room is too big and too quiet". I was going back and forth about how to write it, because I'm a stickler for accuracy, but ultimately I think what I ended up putting conveys the wistfulness and longing a little better than transliterating it would
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This update brought to you by @jujupanic & @jeizet - thank you for supporting me 💖
#re: accurate translations- i am open to opinions so lmk if you guys would prefer a more 1:1 tl#i cannot promise i will translate by the word bc tbh that would be a horrible translation#but i am very new to translating novels (read: this is my first)#so im still figuring out what balance of readable vs enjoyable works best#up to now ive tried to stick as close as possible to what is literally written in the book#but the thing about translating is that if youve translated so precisely that youve lost the voice and the nuances its a failed translation#so i took a few more liberties with how i worded things this time#(while still keeping the gist the same bc i would never lie to yall like that)#(& bc as a reader i hate reading a tl and then looking at the source material)#(and realizing the tler changed the entire meaning of certain lines or changed certain concepts)#ANYWAY#hirano to kagiura#hirano and kagiura#hirano to kagiura ln#hirano to kagiura translation#sasaki to miyano#sasamiya#harusono shou
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Recent game related things .. hrmm...
#I do like the inconsistency of the first map. that is actually something older but that I re-found and added to my Game Reference stuff#so that when characters reference where they're from I can be accurate. I like that the whole map is kind of shifted up that way. Where the#actual south part doesnt even count as the south since its Too Far and Scary lol. and if you say you're from 'the north' thats basically#like.. one single continent. Though some people do make distinctions like 'north midlands' or etc. still. I like the ways that common#language isn't always precisely accurate like that. and thinking about why a culture would classify things a certain way or etc. etc.#The inventory page is so funny to me because it's literally just the BASe like.. sample layout just to make sure it works properly with 0#actual design into it. just colored rectangles thrown together in MS paint. but what if I like... left it like that.. what if all the other#art in the game and UI is like stylized and fully matching BUT the inventory/journal/etc. screens I just left as plain colored blocks#with random misalignments and black spots and etc gjhbhjj... It looks unfinished in a Funny Contrast way to me.#the wordcounts are just like... my past few days of writing.. I am still not getting 2200 words a day done or whatever I needed. I'm lucky#if it's even half of that .... tee hee.. :3c I do also keep having appointments and other things going on but..grrr...#The full map of the area is probably not necessary but I thought it would be more realisitc if people were able to reference things. Like i#you have people all living in a city area probably at some point someone might mention a neighboring city or some landmark nearby#or etc. so I thought having at least the basic names of what's around for reference would be sensible. A side character mentioning#'oh yeah I don't live here full time I just travel from Marisene sometimes' or whatever makes it seem more like a Real#Fleshed Out Place than people just making vague references like 'the river' or 'i come from a city nearby' or 'i went to a place somewhere#around here' or 'the other city' or etc. lol.. Especially since global cities/global areas are weird as they operate almost like an#independent country within their walls. so it's like a micro country inside of another country usually. just plopped down in some agreed#upon plot of land that won't be too disruptive to the main country around it. That could get very complex depending on the cultural and#political backdrop of where they're placed (though obviously they try to choose the 'easiest' areas possible for it). Asen is a very mild#country without much history of conflict or anything so it's fine. But still interesting that Sifeh and the entire branched out global area#border three other districts of Asen. Which means like 3 times the local representitives you'l have to negotiate with for some major change#or anything. I think one of the 'random characters you can find around the world and have short discussions with just to make the area#feel more populated and real even though theyre not actual important npcs' is going to be a guy who actually serves on the council that#handles running the global areas and he's like.. some perpetually exhausted middle aged elf running around with a clipboard or whatever#ANYWAY...... hrgh... still trying to write when I can....#I WISH so badly that I had the scope for a simple character creation menu and all character interactions would allot for the background#of your player character. And also to have a simple day night cycle where places in the world you explore/people you talk to during the day#have new options or dialogue at night.. BUT alas... I already am so behind on everything as is lol.. aughhh... T o T#As the worlds number one Needless Detail And Complexity Enjoyer i must dilligently prevent myself from adding additional complexity
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I was filling out one of those ship chart things for my favorite three dorks and there's something very funny about how h.ijikata has such different nicknames for both his partners
ash gets something flowery and romantic and sweet, but r.yoma? yeah no fuck that guy
#ash rambles 💚#shark attack 🦈!#you were beautiful 💸#it's pretty funny akdjjajs#oh and the i.shin boys dont have canon ages so i had to use my imagination ajdjajd it may not be historically accurate but i do like to#think theyre not that old#anyways yeah#also guys i think I'm getting sick..#this past week has been hell ajshajsjs both school and family and shit#and the sunday?? yeah lemme just get sick why dont i#no rest for a bad bitch like me apparently 😭 I'll be okay and ofc I'm taking care of myself and taking medicine and all the precautions and#all that shit blah blah but like. man. my throaaaat.. hurrrtsss..#oh but! r.yoma is a really good cook in canon#he can make me some soup!!!#yummy <3#ok I'm gonna go eat lunch now#got some hw to do but maybe later today.. I'll play some games... and by some games i mean more y.akuza#oh but i did get G.hostwire Tokyo for free and have been meaning to play it? has anyone here played it? thoughts? advice?#alright have a good day pals!
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gonna keep it shmoovin man
#just me hi#i have a piece i was working on last night that i realized after i didn't have my computer could actually be Much more accurate to my ideaa#but that means i gotta scrap some stuff. sigh ᴗ.ᴗ#also i couldn't get around to readin my thing yesterday cuz my focus was shot for some reason lmao <//3#i would open the thing and then just start. driiiifting away kfshvg#//anyway idk what happened but why have i started to miss Gs at the end of my words Lmfhvaf#i already do that in real life we don't needa do that here too kfshvh#'asz wu' 'm sayin man !!' <- my engrish :3#i do like it though i think it's fun :> but my typingggg not you too kfsvhg#//anywho i've got a $1.75 thing i'm workin on :D#it's gonna hopefully be the third part to those last two i did for that thing#which goes adoration -> devotion -> guess hfh :3#i'm normal abt these guys. [places them in a lunchbox and throws it into the river to watch the bubbles] yea :)#//anyway Wednesday#not the best of the week days i will not lie#like you're stuck between the beginning and the end and it's just got that undecided feeling to it ykno what i mean pfshv#//also LMAO i've been calling feet/foot 'peets/poot' bc i think it's goofy and i don't like the F sound#and i got leo into saying it and he was talkin to somebody and had to explain what it was Lmfhjshfg#my infec- influence is spreading. influence. that's what i said#my woerds: peet. poot. tomach. shnoze. ham. heed. fingaa. ect ect#//ouhhh my collarbone keeps making these snappy noises when i pull my shoulders back#it's only occasional but holy shizz it's loud sometimes. like 'when we're in church i think you can hear it 4 pews back' loud khgsfjhfvjg#//ANYWAY i was mentioning wednesday earlier cuz it's not the best of days on the week (we know this) but i wanna go skating </3#'why isn't wednesday good for that' because it's the middle of the week. [gesturing]#i can't explain it but things need to happen on- Oo i like this songgggkkggg- either weekends or the other 4 days of the weekday#wednesday is for appointments you really don't want. i'm sorry but it's a filler day <//3#which means no happenings on a wednesday. it's illegal. that's right. Illegal#even thursday is iffy man. tuesday? tuesday is your last-chance stop. perhaps i do have thoughts about silly things Kfhvsjhgsf#nobody tell leo he's tryna get me for having a weird brain. the sentence is 5000 years of i-told-you 😔 Lmaooo#//OKAY i think i'm outta tags tho lemme say ciao here loll :3 toodles tooooodles !!! <3
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pinning to the workshop corkboard: you've heard of winston "i'm cassandra" billions clairvoyance concepts for fun & profit, hear also of winston billions sphinx concepts (you must be This understanding of what he means to proceed)
#not a brand new one but the other day i was like have i ever put that to words & post? then i saw two unrelated sphinxposting reminders#winston billions#the riddlerrr sphinx also like yeah yeah winged lion form. kind of a hassle but optional perhaps still b/c yeah that's fun#did have the thought ''what if his pet cat is also secretly what has the winged lion that kills you form lol''#also the thought that whatever Gate / Boundary / [cannot proceed] happens could be Varied as well as Involuntary#would add to the like episodic type possibilities like oops how do we get past this? what's the issue? even winston may not know#meanwhile like Deliberate Obfuscation would only go so far re: the metaphor here being relevant to winston the autistic person#he Has to be understood; on his terms. you gotta work to & actually figure out what he is conveying to you#i suppose also ''or die'' is an option here lol. nightmare scenario for everyone who'd rather steamroll him forever to be sure; but#[you just Can't proceed] applied less lethally than that still affords plenty of You Have To Understand What He Means possibilities#see also: [rian as basically an oc based mostly on pre production hiatus funny little guy status] translating what he means....#just Not Really A Problem shrugmoji (audhd solidarity (rian 5x05 thru 07 oc continues))#yet would hardly imply taylor is a party who wouldn't also usually understand winston easily & accurately (not like 5x07 does either)#plus then complications like do ppl twist Understanders' arms for cheat codes sometimes. try to posit them as hypotheticals lol#in this world where sometimes a coworker is a sphinx or is; in tandem with his cat? well sometimes they're autistic. nonbinary#genderfluid. wear glasses. just another day at the encouragement to crush coworkers factory#anyway something where if i had a zillion detailed thoughts on this it might be other than a brief nocturnal text post but#see also: who says solving a riddle can't be a conversation / the riddlerrr is also trying to figure it out.#like sure i guess i can give clues & hints but i'm not even sure they're useful / not sure what i'm clueing you in to either#clue....like minotaurs out here (clew like the thread/yarn. like is used to find your way through / out of a labyrinth)#anyway e.g. like oh you can't do [xyz] in whatever thwarted way? how can Figuring Out Smthing W/Winston help? maybe he doesn't know either#maybe his cat has materialized huge & Theoretically lethal to thwart smthing. maybe regular size & just swatting at you. who can say#maybe winston is like hm i see that i can fly or kill you more than usual. who else can say. &c. imagine#meanwhile tfw ''okay i genuinely get what you mean'' doesn't guarantee then like. proceeding w/any basic respect beyond that lol#but already more leverage / more effort in that by far & perhaps that ability to just shut ppl out of plenty of [access / do whatever]#when indeed even that leverage had / effort given is considered Too Much#can only be guaranteed basic respect in the winston billions guaranteed basic respect au
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you know whats more annoying than dems calling vance and trump weird is all the condescending posts justifying it actually. like im a bit annoyed about "weird" being used this way but also like man if it fucking works i guess
but do i have to keep seeing daily posts exhaustively justifying how normie midwesterners use weird different or whatever the fuck man just shut up and call them weird then, stop justifying it to me
#toy txt post#i see the value in pointing out to somehow apolitical ppl that these guys are weird in the sense of being invasive controlling racist#creeps with unhinged fucking priorities. i also see the harm in conflating it with 'weird'. i see the value in using it against them#especially since it seems to be? sticking? and i hope most ppl are capable of recognizing that the dems are not using it to mean harmlessl#harmlessly strange or queer or whatever but to mean a fucking creepy asshole with bad motives and priorities#even if the right tries so so so so hard to conflate that meaning with queerness#i also dread the idea that they might start fucking trying to reclaim weird but i dont know if they will. i dont know if theyll redefine it#to work for them. if they can overcome the way they associate it with queerness and neurodivergence. but i do kinda dread a future where#they try to reclaim it like they did with the 'deplorables' shit. regardless of that: the most annoying in all this is everyone writing#fucking thinkpieces about it actually. and the condescending tone of NO YOU HAVE TO BE OKAY WITH THIS#THATS annoying. also:#the dems are going to have to pivot from this at some point anyway. its going to get Stale if nothing else.#i also think calling it cyberbullying is just. not even accurate anyway?#idk. but ik so done reading everyones Takes on it like goddddddd#i also have mixed feelings about the couchfucker misinfo but not as much#mostly like. in terms of misinfo it really doesnt feel worse than the ted cruz zodiac killer thing#except maybe more believable? but also lower stakes lmao#idk. just. sure man#fucking keep fash out of power#fix shit#make it better#the justification makes it worse almost. like cos it means you know my fucking issue with it. just shut the fuck up and call them weird and#ill grit my teeth and assume youre living a sheltered normie life and dont know the joys of weird and thats why youre using it like that#whatever man
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staffy expectations vs staffy reality (by someone who has an absolute sweetheart of an american staffy <3)
#dogs#dog#staffy#staffordshire bull terrier#american staffy#this also applies to pitbulls#idk why staffies are always the ones who are depicted as aggressive and horrible when literally any dog can be just as aggressive#if not even more aggressive#like the only reason you'll see an aggressive dog is because of poor training or abuse#i don't think staffies deserve this poor reputation considering how wonderful they can be if you treat them right#that goes for any animal that has misconceptions of ''aggression'' piled on them#''you shouldn't keep a small child unattended around a pitbull/staffy!'' you shouldn't keep a child unattended around ANY animal#why are staffies always the exception. they are beautiful sweet little guys#ok ''little'' might not be the most accurate way to describe them but you get what i mean#they're literally just the loveliest stinkiest guys ever#my staffy is the sweetest little thing in the world#he does not growl and he does not bite. he will instead lick you and get the zoomies and demand tummy rubs#he always gets so excited when he sees other dogs but if one barks at him even a little then he will immediately get shy and back away#the only time he barks is when people are crossing the street but like. most dogs do that. and he howls at the ice cream truck <3#he's terrified of thunderstorms. like he gets so scared and needs someone nearby at all times#people would probably look at him like ''omg that's such a dangerous breed'' but if he hears even a little bit of thunder he starts shaking#like does that say ''dangerous and will murder people'' to you. no#the worst my dog will do to you is like. accidentally scratch you or something. that's literally it.#oh yeah and fun fact: my dog has one eye!#he had to get it removed because the lens fell out of place and it started getting really nasty and was hurting him a lot#he's lost a bit of depth perception and bumps into stuff sometimes but he's much happier now and has a cool scar on his face-#-where his eye was :)#having a dog with one beautiful eye is better than one who is always in pain#anyway yeah staffies do not deserve this slander. they are wonderful dogs and i will defend them to ends of the earth
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Btw, re: my opinion that computers are not gonna be able to translate sign languages in our lifetime, it's not that sign languages are necessarily More complicated than spoken/written languages (I truly don't know how you'd measure that but I'd assume they're equally complicated). But video is, in terms of sheer data, much bigger and presumably harder to process than audio. I cannot imagine this happening without *astounding* computational resources which would take far more energy, water, and money than a human interpreter (and, more importantly, wouldn't work as well, at least for the foreseeable future). I assume the computation would happen off site in most cases if it did work, meaning the Internet connection is gonna need to be phenomenal (there is already widespread dissatisfaction with VRS human interpreters used in medical settings because half the time the connection drops). Speech to text, with all the issues it still has, seems like a breeze in comparison to 'understanding' a video.
I also cannot wrap my mind around how a machine would handle depictions. Like, with some practice behind me, my human mind is now able to understand (some) depictions I've never seen before (thank goodness, because there will ALWAYS be new depictions I haven't seen before, bc Deaf people are resourceful and creative), but I don't see how a machine would. That's pure sci fi to me. I also wouldn't expect a machine to do a good job translating stuff it's never heard before in a spoken language (e.g. wordplay, or the way you can sometimes tell the meaning of a new slang word from context, or an uncommon name even), but the thing is I think depiction is a much bigger part of daily life than wordplay is?
#Just wanted to clarify I wasn't like being weird and elevating signed languages above spoken#or i mean. if i still am let me know. it's true that ASL seems more complicated to me than English#but i try to recognize and work around that bias#like of course my native language doesn't seem complicated *to me*. i get that#anyway. I also don't know anything about the tech involved so by all means take me with a grain of salt#But this truly feels like common sense to me#If you time traveled me to the year 2080 and I saw a machine accurately translating ASL into English#My first thought would be 'which ocean is being drained for this right now'#And then 'wtf is the sheer size of this program + the database it's working off of'#I think it's cool to study this stuff. Don't get me wrong. But I don't think we should kid ourselves#It's not gonna be practical anytime soon#All that's without even considering the reverse of translating a spoken language back into a signed language#i think because human interpreters aren't perfect (because the job is hard!!) there could certainly be a temptation#to think that machines could be better than humans one day#but man. do you know what would be a better use of resources for the time being?#supporting hearing and especially Deaf interpreters in their studies and jobs#turns out a great way to improve a human's performance is to give them a teammate#we don't have to jump straight to replacing them with a machine#for anyone who doesn't know: if a particular job requires deep understanding of Deaf culture & deafness & the Deaf community#a hearing interpreter can team up with a Deaf interpreter for much better results#like the Deaf interpreter can interpret the hearing interpreter's signing into signing the Deaf client can understand better#and vice versa#anyway. it makes sense people are excited about machines. but can we stop going around saying 'hey AI is gonna take your job'#for jobs that we don't even understand 🙃#this is where y'all find out that this whole wall of text is directed at a guy who said that to my husband
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🎟
#she's ace that means she wants to cuddle but NOT to f*ck#a theatre lesbian explained me to someone else today by saying#which is a much more vulgar way than I would put it but also very succinct and accurate in a way I wouldn't think of#and i haven't stopped thinking about it since akdjdjaofjskgnw#like yeah. hold my hand boy.#i don't like to use labels much bc it isn't like. identity. it's more just a facet of what makes me me??#if that makes sense???#but also for conciceness and clarity's sake i don't have a huge issue with being referred to as ace#shdkshkfns it was such a funny conversation though#the theatre girl was literally like oh you have a huge crush on one of our lead actors? let me tell you how sweet of a guy he is#and then she was like ''dude you should go for it if you want to. also come play d&d with us tonight!''#i did not play dnd. i observed while everyone worked out their characters and then said i might join in later.#idk man i think I'm becoming bold and more confident through this group of people in a way I've never been before#im also gonna send a text to the cast/crew group chat as an invite to church on Easter#gonna get these college kids with the promise of free food. it would work on me!!#ok anyway.
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analyzing hermes, emet-selch, the ancients and ascians, how they're written, and the fandom's reaction to them be like hm. emet-selch's role in this fuckery is compounded by the fact that his backstory as a genocide survivor is incongruous with his ruling a huge genocidal colonialist world power in the present da [ANTISEMITISM BLAST]
#ffxiv#ffxiv hermes#emet-selch#i have Posts in Me to write up about the subject but like you can maybe immediately start connecting some dots here lmao#hermes and the ancients lie at the intersection of A Lot of Shit That is Very Important to Me#the vast majority of it having to do with gaslighting in various different forms#one of those posts is going into how his story reminds me eerily of what Questioning Things in an abusive evangelical environment is like#and how the fandom instantly jumping straight to OH SO YOU THINK THE ANCIENTS SHOULD HAVE BEEN GENOCIDED IS THAT IT#YOU THINK THEY SHOULD BE INFANTILIZED AND CIVILIZED BY THE SUPERIOR MORALS OF YOUR OWN CULTURE IS THAT IT#and start throwing around words like 'sympathizer'; if you say 'hermes was right about some shit actually'#'what we see of the ancients' society is full of inexcusably horrific shit which does not get a pass for ~different values~'#smacks strongly to me of evangelical crybullying in the name of Cultural Sensitivity#and how people use 'well it's not my business what other cultures think is right or wrong' as an excuse to throw up their hands and#disengage from actually learning about or supporting the people in those cultures who know and are working within it to fight bigotry#amazingly enough 'racism and misogyny and queerphobia are bad' is not an idea exclusive to western cultures lmfao#your job if you engage is to seek out those people--across the spectrum of opinions and relationships to their culture's issues!#they're not a monolith!--and spread that information; and listen to what they ask of you when they tell you what kind of help they need#but that's complicated; and takes time and care and thought and effort and connecting to marginalized people#talking over activists and victims of the societal issues they live with; and telling them they're the same as colonizers; is easy-peasy#like i cannot stress enough here that hermes Is an Ancient. He Lives Here. He Knows His Society and Thinks About It a Lot#He Wants to Salvage It and is Specifically Fucked Up About Feeling Like He Can't Trust People Around Him for Input#WoL doesn't barge in and start telling the ancients what's what; they find the person who Cares and back him up that he's not crazy or alon#anyway there's a lot here but it is uh. a Lot. the ways in which the game blends up christianity and judaism here.#including the fact that between the two; the default cultural values and dynamics align more with christian associations of Conformity#(the game is by japanese creators and i feel like that's A Factor too; but there are Eerily Accurate evangelical things going on here)#and people cape for the ones who are Most Evangelical about it + the one whose Compelling Aspects are all antisemitic as fuck tropes#whereas the brown guy who grapples with his faith and worldview; who questions and challenges and argues with others in his ethnoreligion#and tries to look for perspective and deeper meaning + Improve Society Somewhat; gets torn apart in the worst faith possible by the fandom#ffxivtag#warning: worm grass
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Didn't think the 1989 version of The Woman In Black would be scarier than the one with Dan Radcliffe in it
I was Wrong flkjdsafkldsja, but I'm delighted to have been wrong. I had missed getting scared with more practical effects/careful timing of things in the background of shots appearing and disappearing, and this one scratches that itch well.
#text post#also fun seeing how differently they interpreted the characters and how they act#personally i'm realising that the Dan version was sort of. Americanised? Which is probably something I should have realised at first watch#but it only hits now when it's like. how to explain#the casts of both versions are both amazing let's preface with that#but. the Dan version felt very Cinematic. I got scared but was also very aware I was watching An Movie during it#(it got colour-graded quite blue which isn't necessarily a bad thing but it does register in my head as Peak Cinematic for the current time#the version of the characters in this 89 version feel slightly more real? accurate to the culture they come from?#like. there's an American Openness between the ones in the Dan version#they're too open to share and hand out compliments and comments like candy they have too much of#everyone is Nice in a way that feels mildly unrealistic#and when they are mad at each other there's tension but a tension#that to me at least you don't worry abt much bc it just feels almost Already Resolved#and it does sort of just drop off and wind up that way tbh#tho I admit it's been a bit since I read the original story so my apologies if I'm misremembering that it did the same in the book#but I could swear there was more that bit of tension there#anyway it isn't that the 89 characters are all mean but they feel Actually British for lack of better words#they have moments of kindness and do have a general sense of like. yeah they care for their community but also they're getting on w/themsel#and their business and not lingering on the interactions#They're kind but not nice and they just. get on with things which is very nice#and feels more in line with the time period to me/what I expect out of a story like this#anyway speaking of Dan found out the guy playing Arthur in this also played the dad in the gross wizard franchise#which wasn't something I expected to see lol#this is my long barely an essay no one asked for and your sign to go watch the 89 version asap#it's on YT for free which is where I'm watching it so genuinely if anyone want link. I have link fjkdlsfjadlsa#I have so many more thoughts comparing and contrasting Dan to 89 but there are so many tags i'm making myself stop lmao
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wolfram going from viscerally and very Loudly loathing all humans to liking exactly three ( 3 ) of them is so valid and powerful of him. stay discriminating king
#⑊「 ooc#16?? 17?? novels in and he never Truly dropped the humans are trash agenda. he's just willing to make more exceptions <3#wolfram: [FUCK YOU. ...not you guys. not you guys 🎵 didn't mean you guys🎵] tiktok sound#in canon i mean but even as far as this blog's interactions go the number is probably still accurate#anyway SORRY i'm extra quiet across all platforms rn!! this hasn't been a good auspicious year so far >:v but i tri my bes....
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I just watched a tarot card reading and ALL of it resonated. I won at tarot
#but literally not only was it 100% accurate#i also thought at two points about certqin things and the reader addressed them right aftet i thiught about then#this is more proof on the very tall pile of evidence that i might be psychic#anyway how i do watching tarot card readings on youtube is ive subscribed to one tarot card reading channel and every couple of months#one of their videos pop up in my recommended. and that how i know thats the one for me#one thing which is cool. all the last ones said the world was super ready to give me love but i just needed to make some changes#and now that ive made changes and sorta become my true self. low and behold this one says love is about to hit me like a trunk at full spee#on top of that they said that you probably alrwady know who this person is. guess who has a super duper mega crush on a guy that feels righ#they use multiple decks of different card types (not just regular tarot) and not just the lovers appeared but two love cards .#this must mean something#im going to explode im so happy and joyous!
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what is your favourite trope to write? or like.. theme yknow like angst fluff etc hahah
let's ask the statistics!
this is a pretty good representation of a lot of my favorite things to write for sure. huge fan of everything listed here.
HOWEVER
i do enjoy writing some good angst. my writing tastes have changed a bit over the past couple years, and i think now i'm a lot more focused on things that i believe are realistic, rather than idealistic, so in general but particularly with angst it's a lot more grounded and in some cases grittier than the kind of angst i was writing before, which was a lot of Big Poetry and Drama? at least to me?? i don't know. and as an unrelated addition, ive found lately that i really enjoy writing characters interacting with kids. i just think it's really funny.
and of course how can i exclude the most important of my favorite tropes: kitchens are for lovers. if there's a kitchen, i'm there.
#ask#anonymous#intriguing question#it makes me happy that my additional tags accurately represent most of my favorite kinds of things to write#that satisfies my correlation brain#i was going to be like can you believe i have 94 fluff fics#that's an insane number#but i went to look at my ao3 and like#i have 228 fics total. so that is. also an insane fucking number.#it also means i have...one sec#ahem i have 134 fics that aren't fluffy enough to tag as fluff which is FASCINATING maybe ill do a search to exclude fluff#and see what comes up as the most used tags then#im gonna do it yeah one sec again#...the math here aint adding up#it left me with 97 fics? hmm. anyway apparently 18 of them are tagged angst#12 tagged 'happy ending' and 12 tagged 'hopeful ending' LMAO on brand#one more test bc im curious#okay i excluded the angst tag and it took out a bunch and left me with 177#this is a fascinating exercise we should all be fucking around and finding out with our own ao3 works pages more often guys
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