#I mean I’ve known that since like ep 1 but still

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - lots, just LOTS

I thought I would be pretty lean reporting for Oct 2023 but then (for reasons relayed here) the weeklies got saved by a drunk avenging hacker in a hotel room.

Oct 2023 Wk 1

Except I still can't watch IFYLITA, because I use my other computer for it.

Gotta say though, watching tese mostly all in one day (for travel reasons) is beyond even my BL superpowers. I did my best tho.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 8 of 12 - Sailom, sweetie, Kang is never sleeping alone again. It wasn't really translated, but Kang's way of speaking in that opening stinger was VERY cutsie. Also the gay sheets have made another appearance. I do have to say that "rich kid problems" is not my favorite story arc, but I still think this is a great Thai BL.

Naughty Babe (Sat YT) ep 6 of 8 - I love that they are finally talking to each other but Yi’s whole personality is shifting. Honestly, this pair is great at kissing and casual touches, but the friendships are the best thing about this franchise. Also Mr Chenne remains my fav character. But where did Diao's baby superhero team come from? And why? This show is very confusing... It’s also not very good.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) You Are My Soulmate ep 7 - This was the one of the series I was looking forward to the most, because silly, pretty, and v BL. It is, in fact all those things and nothing more. So I'm enjoying it, of course.

Absolute Zero (Thai Weds iQIYI) ep 2 of 12 - I like it, but it feels like it's gonna be so sad. I'm having Promise and Dew the movie flashbacks. Plus 12 eps seems too long for this narrative thread. I am worried.

Venus in the Sky (Tues iQIYI) 6 of 10 eps - This show is so slow it's hardly worth the bandwidth, but we attained "baby is a floppy drunk" and thus a finger bite frustration scene, which was nice.

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 9 of 10 (not a BL but I'm watching it anyway) - Ray is so mean to Sand. The not-a-thing with Sand & Nick was cute. I’ve had several experiences like that. All my queer friendship groups tend to be incestuous, but sometimes they're just too much of a sibling and trying to sleep with them is the most unsexy thing in the universe. To be fair, I’ve also been in Ton’s position (this ep). Jojo sure makes queer shizz. But also, Ton must have a magic rod with everyone wanting a repeat. (I'm so glad they put Neo in this role, no one else at GMMTV could play him as complex or sympathetic.)

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

You Are Mine (Taiwan Fri Viki) eps 5 of 10 - now officially known by me as "I'm too sunshine for this seme" where our boss is being hella obvious but our cinnamon roll is just too ooey-gooey to notice. Al.though, baby boy, he takes you home, sleeps on top of you, feeds you cookies (IN HIS BED) and keeps you in his space? Surely even this sunshine is catching a few rays of truth?

Gaga's *unintelligible gay murmuring* is my favorite caption EVER.

Also the name of my new ASMR YT channel.

Bon Appetit (Korea Weds iQIYI) 3-4 of 8 - ah gay panic, also what is Korea's obsession with 7 year separations? Is it only true love if you wait 7 years? Dohoon is SUCH a flirt, it's kinda great! Also, since it's Korea, we got us a bit of a love triangle with 2 hyung romances, so I (of course) am torn. Either way Dohoon is going down. I do love how much time we are spending with the food in this drama, finally one that lives up to its name. On an entirely different note, Korean camping is the most bizare thing to me. It's SO damn civilized. There will be NO DIRT. They pack blow torches. And full dinner sets. Every time I see it in a drama, I'm amused.

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - OMG these 2 are so in love with each other, and so ridiculous about it. They're tiny idiots but I love them.

If It’s With You AKA Even If I Fall In Love With You AKA Kimi to nara Koi wo Shite Mite mo’ (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 5 - from MBS a live action adaptation of Kubota Maru’s manga ‘君となら恋をしてみても. Amane has stopped loving people due to trauma until he meets Ryuji. At first Amane just wants to play with Ryuji but… feelings.

I like the odd Japanese mature-childishness in this one. Plus a broken sunshine who is out in a kind of aggresive way and an instinctive caring seme. What's not to love? Well, it's Japan I'm sure it will surprise me one way or another.

Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 3 of ? - the cray cray step brother quazi incest is a bit much for me. Why does VBL just suddenly get so unhinged like this?

Kiseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) ep 9 of 13(?) - resumes next week

It's Airing But...

I Feel You Linger in the Air (Fri grey) ep 8 of 12 - I will try to watch 8-12 and do a series review when I get back in November but... not sure I will be able to. Fingers crossed.

Love in Translation (Sat iQIYI) ep 8fin - I will complete and drop a review in Nov.

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - 4th installment in this series (1st series, 1 special, 1 movie prior) about a lawyer who lives with his boyfriend, a hairdresser, and cooks for him. I find thie series more fun to binge, som I'm waiting until it completes its run.

I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan Tues Netflix-Japan & ????) - in classic JBL fashion, I Cannot Reach You could not be reached. 

Can I Buy Your Love From A Vending Machine? AKA Sono Koi, Jihanki de Kaemasu ka? (Japan cinema release in-country only) - This one is a movie from Japan so in customary fashion who tf knows when (or if) it will get international distribution. Salaryman Ayumu Koiwai just can't tear his eyes away from the strong, muscular man as he checks on the stocks of the vending machine in his office.

In case you missed it?

Crazy Handsome Rich (Sun Gaga) Apparently ended its run I DNFed this at ep 3. So no review from me.

My Beautiful Man: Eternal AKA Utsukushii Kare Eternal (Japan movie Viki & Gaga) - Play it again Sam, only I'm kinda tired of this song. I was v dramatic tho. And it's always nice to be reminded JBL can kiss when it puts its mind to it. 8/10

Next Week Looks Like This

Upcoming October BL

10/31 SHADOW (Thai VIU ????) - this is a horror BL featuring ghosts and other paranormal elements in a high school setting. I'm not wild about Thai horror (or horror at all, but if it must be done in BL let Japan do it). It features Singto (who did paranormal BL He's Coming to Me) opposite Fluke N (who's done a couple horror's before). Also Fiat. Dan suffers from sleep paralysis, and in his dreams he sees a shadow that suffocates him. It gets worse when he transfers schools.

10/? Bump Up Project AKA Bump Up Business (Korea ????) - BL staring OnlyOneOf that released(??) as a movie in July but is now being recut and reissued as a series. Stars NineMill and from Idol Romance bulled as a love story between a trainee who is about to debut and a celebrity from the same agency (based on a webtoon). OnlyOneOf have been auditioning for this since Libido IMHO. You can watch me chronicle their BL MV work in this post. Idol Romance will do sad but can do good kisses (Wish You, Nobleman Ryu, Once Again, Kissable Lips, Poongduck 304, Tasty Florida, Tinted With You) but I don't think we will get any in this. After that OmegaX Shoulder bullshizz buisness I am very wary of this show.

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

I've seen this Chinese drama like... no wait... okay it's like EVERY Chinese drama ever.

(both Mr Cinderella 2)

I only got to watch this scene and the bath, but bot were pretty darn good! I Feel You Linger in the Air

There's only one bed but they slept together on the floor anyway. One of BL's oddest tropes.

I do love a finger bite. (both Venus in the Sky)

Good advice

(Naughty Babe)

(Last week) 

[sidecharactersdomatter]

Thoughts I had during TGCF Season 2 Ep 1

I’ve finished my quarter and I am spending my spring break reacting to Season 2! Let’s make this reaction series count!

-Welcome back to Puqi Village people, at morning and known for their chestnuts!  (The best nuts I’ve had outta the packet!)

-We are back at Puqi Shrine people!

-And the Altar is packed!

-Instrumental Hong Jue!!!

-Did he oversleep?

-Aww he’s so lonely! :’(

-Dang.  That is a clear stream

-Eeeeyep, he is thirsty!

-And a water droplet fell past his freaking throat!  They just had to animate that!

-It’s the same ring from last Ep!

-You mean, ‘Gege’ Yeah, I’ve already typed this, “I watch the English Dub religiously” Don’t judge me!

-It is the same ring people!!!

-Oooh he hid it!

-Yep like two years for us in 2023

-Oh her eye bags got deeper and darker

-Welp it just got serious

-Looks like we’re back in heaven

-They added 3D palace shots and camera panning

-Woah that was a really good transition with the bell toll

-I wonder what kept the emperor all season…

-Feng Xin!

-Mu Qing!

-It’s that female Blue robed NPC from Ep 4 on his far left!

-*Looks at how the camera pans up to the Heavenly Capital* My Oc Qing Tao is like: The Oldest Enemy I know, stairs…

-New opening people woo!!!

-New opening animation had me sold!!!  They really improved 2 years later

-I love how the music switches from a majestic powerful orchestra tune to a comical xylophone like leitmotif upon introducing Xie Lian.  To say, “And then there’s that guy.  Then there’s that guy.”

-Social Distancing, Ancient Chinese Pantheon Style

-Man tough crowd today!

-And after every official flees the Trash god, one of my Junior Official OCs, Long He goes, “Huh, who is that dude?”  And then his dad, a Civil God will say, “That dude is the Crown Prince of Xianle.  His highness crown prince Xie Lian!” And then that Civil god begrudgingly brings his palm to his face.

-*Hears Mengyou calling his highness*: Ladies, Gentlemen and Enby friends, Him!

-This has the energy of giving someone a lanyard pass to visit a certain building

-“It’s not that hard!”  “You ascended hundreds of years ago you know better!” “Now keep it with you!”  Only like 4 minutes into the first Ep and that NPC is already getting the best lines.  (More of Lang Qianqiu’s trusty assistant later this season folks!)

-He sounds just like the English actor for Elam, Justin Briner, from the Heroic Legend of Arslan (another awesome historical manga!)  Coincidentally, Elam is also one of Arslan’s most trusted Allies.

-I can’t wait to write more of my ATLA x TGCF crossover, The Scrap Immortal and the Avatar, just imagine the Gaang’s reaction to learning that there’s more than one crown prince worshipped!

-Man, it’s like I always say, “The rumor mill’s always a’runnin!”  Or water wheel since it’s ancient China

-Hi Ling Wen, man what kind of product did she use to hide those eye bags???

-I’ve started reading the Manhua series so, Huh? No cursed shackle?

-It’s been days and you still haven’t found the Moldy faced boy from Episode 3???

-I also can’t wait to write Aangs reaction inside that huge throne room, (“It’s bigger than the one in Ba Sing Se!”)

-Now we’re actually seeing the emperor, the first time was in the Episode 1 flashback near the end

-Now we get the first appearance of Pei Ming, who appeared in the Flashback of Ep 3

-Well that sounded patronizing coming from Pei Ming

-Now Pei Xiu has to reap what he sowed.

-Yep that’s a kill count

-I love how this next scene is basically,

Pei Ming: Your Highness, please tell everyone who accompanied you?  Then Xie Lian starts to compose an alibi:  Ah yes!  I will do that.  It was incredible!  What did we get swept in a sandstorm or something?  Oh yes! It was just a youth in red robes who was knowledgeable about the Ban Yue kingdom.  <- This incorrect quote is inspired by Zuko and Iroh lying to Commander Zhao about the state of their ship in episode 3, The Southern Air Temple.  (Does anyone else think that Xie Lian, is what would happen if you combined both Iroh and Zuko?)

-The face Xie Lian made when he’s trying to keep fibbing and brought his index finger to his cheek that was good body language

-Hi Windmaster.

-Oooh Feng Xin and Mu Qing

-Welp you tried keeping him innocent Xie Lian

-Not as complicated as your love life, maybe I should do a Pei Ming roast count?

-Hey Xie Lian is smarter than you look

-Pei Xiu still wants to protect Ban Yue even facing his impending banishment.

-Ok that line and Pei Ming’s attempt to kick Pei Xiu does seem like an abusive action in my perspective.

-Woah, and that was Jun Wu’s own gavel.

-Well that was a short trial

-Him calling Xie Lian to stay, has the exact energy of a teacher calling one student to stay after class to talk.

-Ling Wen is now talking with Jun Wu

- Now that was a really brief meet up between the Xianle trio.

-Thank you Wind Master, and they are a savage!

-Well he’s still mad

-*Sees Qianqiu still asleep standing up*: XDXDXDXDXD

-Aw he woke him up!

-Don’t worry honey, you didn’t miss much anyway

-How in the heck was he able to doze off through all that shouting. I almost fell asleep in a lecture and that’s nothing compared to TaiHua’s feat

-*Hears Jun Wu speak like*: Oh gods! Why did they have to make him sound so seductive! He’s like an East Asian Belos! (And I’m still busy working on Murder They Cast’s first phase)

-Oh Xie Lian’s expression when Jun Wu talks to him, it’s concerning!

-That soft “forgive me”

-I mean we learned about his huge failure in Season 1

-“How Disappointing!” STOP!!!

-Oooh I didn’t notice this during the rewatch but they played a stringed instrumental version of Bu San.

-Srsly HOW BIG IS HIS FREAKING PALACE?!?!?!

-A mural of heaven

-You gotta love Xie Lian’s modesty

-“Such a low opinion” yep his voice is like liquid gold and it is pure torture!

-“How’d you seduce trouble this time!” That tease in his voice why!!!!

-Aw good for you Xie Lian

-Just you wait till the second half of this season

-It’s their version of shooting a flare gun

-Oooh from left to right is Feng Xin, an unknown person behind him, next there’s Ling Wen(with what happens later in the series), Lang Qianqiu in the middle, Mu Qing is next, then there’s Pei Ming in front of him, and the last guy might be Quan’s Yizhen since he also appears in the 2nd half of the series. I hope I found every martial god

-Also the Thunder Master (my OC Leishi) tends to work part time

-There are retired officials???

-In tsiata (my TGCF x ATLA crossover, The Scrap immortal and the Avatar) Ghost City is more modernized than the Spirit World, since it’s mostly untamed wilderness

-Oh he had balls defending San Lang people

-“Your majesty makes me sound like a little princess” yeah that’s what you are honey

-That pose! I was watching this ep with my older sister and she said, “Man is draping himself!”

-He’s gonna touch the scimitar, isn’t he? (I’ve watched clips of Season 2 before doing my reaction posts)

-And Xie Lian still has the best preferences good on him!

-Xianle trio mention

- And I still think clearing the debt should’ve taken longer, but that’s just my small nitpick

-Yeah nobody round here can keep a secret

- *Sees Jun Wu walk up to Xie Lian reminding him to be careful and puts his hand on his shoulder*: That’s too much pressure!!!

- “I had it erected for you.” James Cheek totally had fun writing Season 2’s script

-I can see why he prefers his own shrine over how massive and opulent his new palace is.

-Hi Windmaster

-Ooh a pond reflection

-Yep that’s your traveling parter

-Then he just fans himself and he instantly slays

-Jacob Eiseman had fun with his performance and ate up every crumb

-Windmaster is Genderfluid Bisexual culture people!

- “Thoroughly~” Yep that just slayed me I’m down

-Yeah Qingxuan’s cultivation backstory is gonna age like curdled milk in Book 4

-Man I just love all of Xie Lian and Shi Qingxuan’s interactions with each other!

-Xie Lian, honey, you are way too good to be a tumor, trust me

-I love how Qingxuan also defended Ban Yue from Pei Ming

-“You were my kind of crazy” I love how Shi Qingxuan and Xie Lian instantly became besties

-Dude, Qingxuan puts the “fun” in function in both forms!

-This is exactly the reason I made my Thunder master OC Leishi female too.

-Now I gotta draw Xie Lian’s female form

-Yeah I react the same when letting a small amount of alcohol in my system

-The witching hour

-To quote a well known assassin Yor Forger, “No way I’m doing this sober”

-That one wrinkled ghost did not age gracefully

-Yeah their burial grounds are in Taiwan, awesome island I definitely need to visit

- Why did they have to design every Heavenly Official to be so Attractive???

-It’s the Spirit World from Spirited Away

-Ghost City would seem like a more modern area than the Spirit World in the Last Airbender

-The heck’s this confetti

-Ooh I like the green dressed spirit with the dark bamboo hat

-Hi Jian Lan

Literally any of my young adults would react to a promiscuous person with just one word in annoyance, “Prostitutes…”

-Honey Xie Lian is already outta your league, try finding someone else that’s your type

-Yeah you didn’t have to tell everyone about your medical condition, heck I don’t even want to picture the Gaang’s reaction after hearing it

-Ghost City is the Las Vegas of Ancient China

-Bouncers

-I love the female NPC that greeted Xie Lian she has a great voice and design

-Oh I know who that is

-He clutched his heart!

-“No thanks~” *Instantly fans myself*

-The camera pan to this throne!!! He is gay and he means business!!!

-James Cheek has ate it up!!!

-The soft “San Lang”

That was an awesome start to the Second Season. Sorry if I haven’t been posting I’m four weeks into my quarter and I also got back into writing fanfic, like the first chap of The scrap immortal and the Avatar. I’ll still do every reaction to Season 2 on weekends!

[anonymous12846271]

My thoughts on Alux Rising Ep 1 ✨

CW: A teeny bit of swearing along with major spoilers for the first episode of Alux Rising (ofc), moderate spoilers for the reboot of Sabre’s Assassin’s Creed series and Rainbow Quest and slight spoilers for Sabre’s original Assassin’s Creed series

-Is that a cHILD?  • It’s not a child, just a man in a very large bed.

- Wait, is he wearing a T-shirt and flannel pants? WHAT? Isn’t this supposed to be, like, in the style of medieval time? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not an expert on medieval fashion nor am I holding this fantasy minecraft world to be completely accurate to real life historical fashion trends, but flannel pants huh? 

- Also, he’s wearing what looks to be a prized necklace while he’s sleeping. That’s a terrible idea. Don’t wear important jewelry while you sleep, put it somewhere safe and put it back on when you wake up.

- WANNA BET? *Proceeds kick the door so hard that the lock freaking breaks*  

 • Also, is a lock supposed to break that easily? Can you just kick a door and break the lock like that? Something doesn’t feel right there.

- Okay, but I love that this is how they chose to introduce Petro. What an entrance.

- There’s a big ass green powerful looking sword in the background. Wanna bet that that thing is gonna end up being important later on? 

- WaIT, is the little man royalty?

- Omg, this man’s attitude is so wild. I like him. “Sadly I cannot, for you see I am not an uptight snob” Sksksksks kudos to the people who wrote this script I’m having a lot of fun

- I love how this is one of the very few roleplays where Sabre is choosing to not play as a self-insert yet he’s still playing a pale young man with brown hair and green eyes- 

- Ooh the little man IS royalty! Knowing Sabre, this can only mean bad things for Alux lol.

- This animation is in many ways rough but the way they animated Petro’s chuckle at 1:47 is simply perfect thank you.

- Is that a reference to the original Assassin’s Creed roleplay?? He didn’t steal anything from Alux so it’s not a one to one callback, but still, not the first time a FMS roleplay has started with the protagonist getting bumped into by someone passing by. 

- Our boy just face planted into a stone path?? It’s a miracle that he didn’t break his nose, good grief.

- Someone please protect the little man from getting bullied thank you   - Little man’s got daddy issues, we’ve got another sad boy with a sad boy backstory, let’s go.

- How did he not know about Alux’s mom HOW LONG HAVE THESE TWO KNOWN EACH OTHER

- I feel like I’ve heard these women before but I couldn’t possibly tell you where. They might just have one of those voices, bear in mind that they’re both voiced by the same person.

- WOW, throwing a hardback book at someone’s head from another floor? Ik he insulted her, but that’s still practically attempted murder.

- Alux laughing about his potentially concussed friend with the person who would’ve been responsible if he was concussed. I see nothing wrong with this. /sar 

- Random but I love the shiny gold texture on Alux’s suit

- Also random but what’s with the blue glowing stuff on Petro’s belt? Is is magic? Will it end up being plot relevant later? What’s going on Sabre, why did you want that stuff to glow??

- Does the Dark Angel use she/her and they/them pronouns? Assuming that this recollection of the story uses their correct pronouns, I think they use she/her and they/them pronouns. They might be an evil enby queen and I’ll drink to that.   • On another note, them being a demi-girl is only one explanation for the multiple pronouns, although it is definitely an intentional choice. I can think of atleast a couple other reasons for why this would be.

- Also, assuming that she’s gonna stay a villain, the Dark Angel is one of the first non-male villains in a FMS roleplay a long time and if I remember correctly one of the first female-leaning villains since 2017. That’s pretty hype!!

- A ruler, a guardian of light. I wonder who that is. Feels like something that’ll be important later~ :] • Mmm he sacrificed himself? Interesting, still have a feeling he’s gonna be important later tho. 

- So who are the magic users specifically? Are they those under the command of the Guardian of Light, or are they a broader group? I don’t think it’s really explained.

- “Her great army was released from their grasp” *Multiple pronoun sets intensify* 

- The fact that Sabre is choosing to make another series with themes of dark/light based magic and an ancient evil sealed away eons ago when the SCU is still literally just right there is an interesting decision. I get wanting to rehash old ideas but usually people only do that after they’re FINISHED with the old story. I don’t think the SCU is dead?? As far as I know, Sabre hasn’t said anything about it and TR would be a weird end lol.

- Also, can I just say that I am so happy to see Sabre making a series that takes place in a universe of his own creation after all these years? I mean, yes, all of his stories have taken place in worlds that he created, but they were all directly inspired by settings created by other people (Assassin’s Creed, Minecraft, FnaF, The Crafting Dead, etc, etc, etc) and to see something unique to him is just- it makes me really glad, I’ve been wanting Sabre to do something like this for a really really long time. Plus, The Steve Cinematic Universe, although I like it and I’m really hoping Sabre is still gonna make another series for it in the future, was starting to go in a direction with it’s lore that isn’t exactly to my taste and we were getting so much of it that I was starting to get a bit sick of it. It’s nice to have a big project like this between the SCU projects to break things up, and it’s really refreshing to just have some good ol’ fantasy after whatever Twisted Rainbow was.

- Petro is acting like there’s more to this story than it seems and that it’s less black and white than it appears, but the version of it he just read from the book makes it seem like the Dark Angel is clearly evil and that the light folk are the heroes. I want more details. 

- “You can’t pick roses without shedding a little blood. Nothing’s perfect, but the result is beautiful.” Petro are you gonna become a villain later? Tell me the truth now because that’s some sussy dialog. 

- Alux, son, what are you doing??? What are you doing that could get you executed???.?  • Edit: I think that he was exaggerating, e.g. “My Dad’s gonna kill me”.  

- Okay but people just calling their father ‘Father’ like a name instead of ‘Dad’ or ‘Papa’ has so much power thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.  • Father, it’s me, Michael- 

- Hamatria? Is that how that’s spelled?? There are no human-written subtitles, so I can’t tell. But besides that, I’m also intrigued by this other kingdom and their potential history with this kingdom.

- What is the name of this kingdom? Has it been stated yet? I’m not sure..  • Oh good grief in the title of the video it says that it’s called the Cozen kingdom I’m an idiot. Also, interestingly enough, ‘cozen’ is actually a word and it means to trick or deceive. Was that intentional?

- I know that this is most likely just because the people who made the skins are the same, but it’s interesting how the armor on the guards looks almost exactly the same as my beloved Francis’ armor. Good grief I miss MC Trapped. :’[

- Omg, how old is Alux? Is he an adult or a minor?? Because bro, his dad is OLLD. ANCIENT. HOW OLD WAS ALUX’S MOM???

- So Cozen and Hamatria have conflicting views about magic users? What are those views? Why do they hold them? Who are the magic users specifically and why are they controversial? What was the origin of the book that Petro read? Why did Elric not want Alux to know about that story? Where is Petro from?? So many questions so little answers... 

- “How am I supposed to lead this kingdom when I don’t even know anything about it” Implying that Alux has been trapped within the walls of the castle rather than just within the kingdom.

- “To keep all of us safe”??? What does THAT mean?? I gotta ask what the exact motive behind keeping Alux here is. It could simply be a parenting strategy, but I wonder if there’s some other reason? I know how Sabre loves his chosen one prophesies.  - There’s a lot of green around in both the kingdom and the throne room which implies that green is the insignia color of the kingdom yet the king himself isn’t wearing it, only his son? Interesting.  

- Also, it only just occurred to me, but it’s really funny how green seems to be an important color in this series while it’s coming out on Saint Patrick’s Day. 

- BRITISH! THE KING’S ASSISTANT IS /BRITISH/! Asdfghjk- in all seriousness, although it might be unintentional and just a quirk of the casting, him being british implies that he’s from another region which is really interesting.  - Also, according to the credits, I think the assistant’s name is Azrael which is really foreboding because that’s the name OF THE ANGEL OF DEATH-   • He’s wearing all black too XD

- Omg, it’s Jerome! The man who refused to play Rainbow Steve even though he wanted the role because he misunderstood the production process of the series. Good to see him! X’) 

- BiSH, please, this is the heir of the kingdom?? This is the only son of your boss, have some respect???? Actually, who hired this guy? Why is this the guy who’s supposed to train Alux?

- “HoW dArE yOu, YoU LiTtLe BrAt” 

- Oh wow he kicked him in the delicates! Wait a minute, shouldn’t the armor guard agaisnt that?? Am I wrong here?? You’d think that would be a weak spot they’d want to protect when designing armor, but atst I don’t really know anything about armor design- 

- I’m already in love with these characters. They’re all so endearing. I’m having the time of my life, big claps all around.

- “Tired of being treated this way, like I’m something to be ashamed of.” ???

- Just hit me like a freight train, but just like Azrael, Petro has a foreign accent which implies that he’s a foreigner to this land. 

- So, Alux and Petro are the same age? That’s interesting..? How long have they known each other? Why is Petro teaching Alux when they’re the same age?? Who even IS Petro, who are his parents, what does he do in this kingdom???  • Edit: I think that the reason Petro is in a role where he can teach Alux about things is because Alux has been isolated from those outside of the castle. Also, sometimes more advanced students can tutor less experienced students and I think it’s implied that Petro is a scholar.  - “Think of it this way: atleast you don’t have to see him for a week.” AGED LIKE MILK

- When I laid eyes on this art style, y’know, I didn’t like it very much, but now that I’m more immersed into the episode it’s kind of grown on me?? It’s honestly kind of cool-

- Why are all of the people in the guard, like, all of these garbage douche people? Who’s hiring these guys???

- I can see in the pages of the book that they’re using a different writing system. It’s probably an alphabet but honestly, who knows. Either way, it’s an important thing to note down.

- HEY, I JUST REALIZED. ARE THEY USING MODS AGAIN?? I think I recognize the texture for that shield!! Cool bro! I love Minecraft mods and seeing youtubers actually use them makes me really happy.

- It probably helps that the series is so cinematic, but I’m appreciating  how the world feels like it’s actually to scale. Rainbow Quest was a bit wonky in that regard, with what was meant to be massive cities looking more like moderately sized towns, so this is a lot more immersive.  

- Another dead father in a FMS roleplay??  - What do they want exactly? Is it an abstract thing like power, control or pride or rather something real like an object or a person? I’ll guess we’ll see....

- Oh Jerome guard bless your soul, I love him so much. Honestly this is making me really regret the fact that he wasn’t willing to take on Rainbow Steve’s role in Rainbow Quest, like, more so than I already regretted it.

- It isn’t an object but it COULD be a person. If it is a person, the Dark Angel and Alux are both HIGH on the list. 

- NOO JEROME GUARD!! 😫😫 Tbf I kinda knew that he was gonna die but stilll

- Is Elric’s sword made out of gold? Because if it is that’s not a very good material for weapons.

- Yup, another dead father in a FMS roleplay.

- So are these men the worshippers of the Dark Angel? Interesting, interesting. Does that mean that she’s regained enough power to begin taking over the minds of men again??

- Man, I remember that blood texture from Sabre’s old roleplays from 2016. It’s good to see the classic mods making a comeback.

- Hello James, the writers have declared that you’re gonna survive, which makes sense considering your previous appearance.

- I’m honestly intrigued by James’ characterization. It’s kinda interesting how he seems to look down on Alux but is so dedicated to Elric. I wonder if that’ll be elaborated on in the future.

- They!! They didn’t let us hear what the promise was!! What was it!? This is gonna be important later on, I can just feel it in my bones.

- Every time I write a new character or place name in this document I have to tell Pages to learn the word so that it won’t underline it- curse you cool fantasy names.

- Okay, but real talk, they should’ve brought more guards as an escort. Even though they couldn’t have predicted the Dark Angel worshippers or whatever, this was still during a time of conflict, and they literally mentioned that people from Hamatria were coming over and causing issues and that there was talk of war. They were literally bringing their king to a potentially hostile nation and they only brought, like, 10 guards TOPS. Not a great decision.

- Time for the little man to undergo L O S S

- His last conversation with his father was an argument. F in the chat please.

- Y’know, this series is reminding me a lot of the Assassin’s Creed reboot in certain aspects (Which is definitely a good thing), but it’s making me wonder what a meeting between Alux and ACT!Sabre would look like? They have basically polar opposite backstories, what with Sabre being orphaned when he was 11 and living the rest of his childhood and the entirety of his teens on the run whereas Alux looks like he’s been completely isolated and sheltered up to this point, so how would they get along?? 👀

- CREDITS, THERE ARE CREDTIS!!! OMG, I HAD JUST BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW HARD IT HAD BEEN TO UNDERSTAND THE PROCESS BEHIND SABRE’S ROLEPLAYS WITHOUT KNOWING WHO WAS WORKING ON WHAT ASPECTS OF THEM OVER THE YEARS!! YAY! :D    • Actually, wait, were there credits in The Crafting Dead? I just checked the end of the final episode and there don’t seem to be any so I don’t think there are.

- I had been assuming that Sabre had always served as the producer and director in all of his roleplays over the years, but interestingly, this episode wasn’t directed by him, only produced by him. Has that been the case for most of his roleplays..?

- Phoenix Flare seems to be a really really key person who worked on this episode. They directed which is one of the most important roles in the production of a series and also worked on the skins, the builds, the music and the voice acting. Interesting.

- A really glaring omission here is the writers, which is really important especially when you realize that this was animated rather than acted out in game, so there isn’t really any room for improv. Maybe they just decided to group that in with either production or direction and either Sabre or Phoenix Flare wrote this, but there’s just absolutely no indication of anything regarding the writing really? The writing is always the most important aspect of a story so it concerns me that the writers aren’t being credited.

- Also, the animators. Where is the credit for the animators?? Who  animated this???? Was it just Sabre???

- Now, my thoughts: So far, it’s quite good! This episode was really solid all things considered. I do have some slight concerns with certain aspects of the episode and it does feel a bit rough at times, but this is really promising and so far it feels like an improvement over Sabre’s other recent stories, atleast in regards to the flaws that have been personally bothering me. The pacing actually feels solid which is really really major for me, granted that it’s a bit faster than what I normally enjoy and it took a bit of adjusting before I could really get into it. Now of course, I can’t really judge this story right now since we only have one episode. I had similar feelings about Steve Legends at first and that series ended up really disappointing me, but it’s been a strong start so far. I really enjoyed this episode and once again, I’m feeling cautiously optimistic about this series, even more so than before! :]

- Also, for anyone who struggled to enjoy the episode, I just wanna add that this story is very very different from anything that Sabre has worked on before and if you’re in love with that classic roleplaying style that Sabre was more well known for, I can see how you would prefer something like Rainbow Quest over this. Although I love the cinematics, I personally prefer the filmed in Minecraft style more than the animation but I get that this makes it a lot easier for the actors and allows them to do more with the visuals. At the end of the day, this is all down to subjective taste and I’ll gladly watch any of Sabre’s older serialized roleplays (aside from Twisted Rainbow /hj) with you guys any day. ❤️❤️❤️

[captainswan618]

Goddamn I can’t believe Lucienne actually kissed her

Now hopefully Margaret can convince her to not be evil lmao

[xoxo-teddybear]

What Have I Done? - Bakugou Katsuki- pt.2

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: Angst, Mentions of suicidal thoughts, fluff, insane behavior, nsfw, noncon! Dubcon!, murder, stalking, abusive behavior, yandere!Bakugou, cursing, blood, lowkey kinda slow burn (meaning the beginning is a little boring BUT IT GETS GOOD I SWEAR😭)

Ep. Warnings: Angst, hitting, cursing, stalking, kidnapping, murder

Summary: It’s been awhile since you’ve left him. Two months actually but it was two months too long. Katsuki was slowly going insane and I guess you could say he officially has because he’s officially snapped. You become his main target, his number one priority, his entire being even though you’re trying to leave him. But Katsuki won’t let you. You’re his..and in the words of Bakugou Katsuki..you always will be.

A/N: ....I made it a yandere story y’all. OH SHI-

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Chapter 1

Twitch, twitch, twitch. That’s all Katsuki’s body been doing. Either his eyes or his fingers, his body is uncomfortably moving. Shit doesn’t feel right for him. And he knows exactly why. You left him.

The first week was horrible. All Katsuki did was cry. He even kept his destroyed home in shambles because he couldn’t find the motivation to do anything. If it wasn’t for Kirishima, Katsuki would have starved himself to death. The second week was just as bad. Nothing but a crying baby being taken care of by his best friend.

The third week is when Katsuki become a drunkard. He made Kirishima and the boys of the Bakusquad constantly take him out whenever. As long as the place served alcohol, he would go. He would go and drink himself to sleep. While he was intoxicated he would cry about how he misses you and how he was a terrible husband. He always said you deserved better but he was too in love with you to let you go. The 4th week was pretty much the same.

After a whole month without you, Katsuki threw himself into depression. For the entirety of the second month, he locked himself within the walls of his home. Thankfully, it was now considered a home environment once again after his dear friends cleaned the place up for him. Katsuki stayed inside all day, drank his soul away every night, and sobbed constantly. Constantly regretting how he neglected you, how he mistreated you, and how he hurt you. He doesn’t even know how he even brought himself to do that. Even though he’s been alone for almost 2 months, he still had hope that you would come back. That things would go back to normal and he would be a better husband to you, just like he promised.

Katsuki felt himself going mad and slipping away, but what pulled the trigger was what Kirishima brought to him on the 6th week.

—

Flashback

“WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?”

Katsuki looked down at the papers in his hands. Kirishima had walked in with a nervous and sad look on his face when he gave Katsuki the papers you had the red head deliver. “Sorry man...”

Katsuki shook as he stared at the divorce papers with wide eyes. He saw you already signed it and all the paper needed was his signature. His face grew dark as something in his mind snapped. Katsuki turned to his friend and instructed him to get out of his home.

“What? Man are you alright?” Kirishima said. He walked to his best friend and when he reached a hand out for him, Katsuki pulled on his arm and pushed him out the door. He slammed it shut and locked it as he looked at the papers.

A scary smile grew on the man’s face. His eyes grew crazy as he laughed maniacally. Hysterically. As if what he held was the most hilarious thing in the world. His palms began to spark as he used his quirk to destroyed the papers. The quick blast made his hair floof around a bit and when it was over, a pile of ashes lay at his feet.

“She-....she thinks she can leave me?” Bakugou began to walk to the framed picture on the coffee table. He picked up the picture of you both on your last anniversary and ran his finger over the image of you. “Poor Princess....you can’t leave me. You need me. Just as much as I need you. I mean..hehe...look at what I mess I’ve been. I can only assume you must be worse. But it’s okay, love...I’ll find you soon enough..and I’ll help you feel better,” he walked to his bedroom and layed down on the soft mattress as he held the frame close to his chest as he stared sinisterly at the ceiling, “and we’ll never be apart again.”

—

The 7th week was when it began. Katsuki took some time off of work. He was gonna be too busy for hero work. He had something much more important to do. He had to bring you home.

Katsuki spent the 7th week looking for information on you. He was up 24/7 reading all he can, talking to as many people as he can, and doing all the digging he could until he found you. Unfortunately for him but luckily for you, he found nothing. It pissed him off. How could you have completely erased your existence? Did you just go into hiding or was he not searching hard enough.

This time, the luck switched. Katsuki was just walking to the store when he looked to the far side and saw you in a cab. He had to do a double take to make sure he wasn’t mistaken but after a good glance and taking a picture for confirmation, he knew it was you. His body almost betrayed him as he almost went in to run after you but luckily his brain stopped him. He had to think. Katsuki hid in an alleyway nearby as he watched you from the side. When the driver continued down the road, that’s when he began to follow you. He used his hero training and quirk to keep up with the car. He followed you for miles until the cab finally stopped at some hotel. He watched you walk in and decided this was far enough.

He knew where you were now. He could wait a little longer before snatching you up. If he did it now in broad daylight, chaos would break out. He had to wait for the perfect moment to get you back. He was okay with waiting. He knew where you’ve been staying, how to get there, and knew what time you got back from wherever that cab picked you up. And then it hit him. The cab.

Katsuki went back to look at the picture he took of you in the cab and checked the license plate. With this information, he went home to find where the vehicle was.

Katsuki busted the door open to his home and ran straight to his in-home office. He went to log onto his work laptop that he used for hero work. The laptop contained the tools and websites that would allow him to find the cab. He finally reached the site he was looking for and went back to the picture. There, he typed in the license plate number.

“よ 57-342” he whispered aloud. Finally, he located the vehicle and went to find it. Katsuki followed the location until he found the house where the driver stayed. He waited in hiding, hoping someone would come out and hoped that the someone would be the driver. He waited and waited until finally, after almost 2 hours of waiting, a man came out. Katsuki quickly pulled up the picture and made sure it was the same person who was driving you, and to his luck, it was.

He quickly ran to the driver before he could get into the cab and pulled him into a dark corner. He slammed the man up against the wall and pulled up a picture of you. “Listen! You dropped this girl off at a hotel, I need to know where you picked her up! Tell me! Now!”

“W-whoa!” The driver exclaimed as he took notice of Katsuki’s identity. “Y-you’re Dynamight!”

Katsuki sucked his teeth at the fact that this guy knew who he was but then again, he wasn’t surprised. He was the number 2 hero after all. “Yeah! I am! Now tell me where you picked up my wife you dog-faced loser!” He screamed.

“Y-you’re wife??” The man looked at the picture and recognized you and the name you gave him. “Oh! M-Miss Y/N! Yes! Uh-..uh- I- she- I- ..I picked her up from a gym!” The man exclaimed.

“What gym?! Tell me!!!” Bakugou shouted at the man.

“I-I’m sorry! I don’t know if I can! She- she said she got divorced so how can I trust you’re her husband?!” The man shouted in fear.

“Are you calling me a liar?! I’m a fucking pro-hero! Why would I pull some bullshit like that! Tell me where my wife was! What?! Gym?!” Bakugou screamed once more. In fear, the man gave Katsuki the information he needed.

“Hosu Gym!” The man shook and Bakugou stared for a minute to scare the poor guy before dropping him to the ground. As he walked away, the man spoke up once more. “D-Dynamight, sir. I-If miss Y/N doesn’t want to see you..and you’re forcing information out of people..I’ll have to tell the authorities..sir.”

“You’re not gonna do a damn thing. You hear me?!” The pro screamed. Bakugou side eyed the man as he watched the driver get up from the ground.

“Sir. From the small conversation we had in the car, Miss Y/N said she was divorced-“

“We aren’t divorced!!” Bakugou said as he made a random explosion to intimidate the man. “We are still together, and she is still my wife, and none of this is any of your business!” Bakugou began to walk away but heard the driver grumble something under his breath that triggered something in his brain.

“I can see why she left a crazed man like you...” the driver mumbled. Katsuki quickly snapped his body to face the man and jumped on him. His burning hand found it’s way around the man’s neck and began to squeeze.

“The hell did you say?! You’re gonna wish you never said that you fucking fool, cuz now those are gonna be your last words!” Bakugou said before he activated an explosion and killed the man. Katsuki took deep breaths before realizing what he did and for some reason, he felt no remorse. And he knows why.

“That idiot should’ve known better than to talk about me and Y/N like that...s’his own fault he died.” Bakugou said before walking away from the gruesome scene. He acted like nothing happened as he made his way to Hosu Gym. He just needed to know what time your got there and when. Then, he could finally go home before continuing his plan for the next day.

—

The blonde decided to wait for some time before he went into the building. It was getting dark and so the gym would be closing soon. He waited and waited until finally, the place was empty. Empty except for the man who worked at the front desk.

Katsuki slipped in right before closing and hid himself in the locker room. He waited 10 minutes before going out and finding the one employee he saw. After exploring the area, Katsuki found the man sitting on a bench. He snuck up behind him, and pounced. He covered the man’s mouth as he tugged him into the back room. Once inside, The blonde threw the man in and locked the door to prevent anyone getting in or out.

“W-What is going on? D-Dynamight, what is happening?” The employee asked in fear. He assumed a threat was going on or some trouble was taking place outside of the gym. He had no idea the trouble was standing right in front of him.

“I need you to tell me when this lady came in.” Bakugou said and pulled up a picture of you. The man looked at the picture and shook his head.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t recognize-“

“YOU WILL! This woman came in here today and I need to know what time! TELL ME!” Bakugou screamed as he lit sparks in his palm. The man shook in fear at the hero’s booming voice and began to look harder. After a minute, he finally spoke.

“I- I remember. She came in hours ago! Sometime around 12 to 2!” The man said in hopes the yelling would stop. It didn’t.

“ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?! There’s a huge space in between! I need to know exactly what time she came in! Don’t you morons have a sign in?!” Bakugou screamed.

“We do! We do sir!” The man nodded his head in fear. Bakugou huffed before walking over to him and dragging him by his collar to seat him on the chair in front of the computer.

“Then get into your data base and FIND MY WIFE!” The blonde screamed. The worker nodded frantically before getting right into it. Bakugou watched his every move and the computer. He kept a sparkling hand right next to the man’s head to keep him intimidated as he worked. Eventually, Bakugou saw your profile picture on the screen when the man scrolled down. “Stop. Her. Check what time she came in.”

The man read the drafts and spoke. “1:30 p.m.”

Bakugou nodded before walking to the door and unlocking it. He turned to the trembling man and gave a quick warning with a sinister smile. “If I ever find out that you told anybody, even your own damn friends or family, about what happened tonight, I won’t hesitate to come back and kill you. Am I clear?”

The man gave a quick and jittery “y-yes sir!” As he watched the pro-hero leave the room. Once Bakugou was gone, the man let out a breath of relief and allowed the few tears he was holding back to fall. Bakugou Katsuki definitely struck fear into those of the lives he met.

With this simple information, Bakugou smirked as he walked out the gym doors. He knows where you live, what gym you go to, what day you go, and what time you arrive. You were always a very punctual person. You had a schedule and you followed it through and through. He completely trusted the fact that when he came back here next week, he would be sure to see you. All he had to do now was wait 7 days.

—

7 days have passed and Katsuki was waiting for your presence in the gym. After finding out you arrived at 1:30, he showed up almost an hour earlier at 12 just in case. He waited and waited for you to show. He was almost out of patience, but after seeing that it was only 1:00, he settled the slightest bit. It wasn’t until he took notice of a familiar figure at the desk.

The man Katsuki had threaten nights ago was shivering and shaking in his boots as he greeted people at the door. He was aware that the pro hero was in the building and after the incident of what went down that night, he was definitely scared for his life. Bakugou began to walk to the man and said man could feel a scary aura coming around. When he turned, he was greeted with the sight of a smirking Katsuki.

“Hey friend,” Bakugou said with his hands in his pockets.

The man jumped at the sound of his voice and his scary presence made his eyes teary. “H-Hello Dynamight.”

“Thought I’d just come by to warn you again. When Y/N walks through those doors, don’t you fucking dare try telling her about me or my presence here. Got that.....” Katsuki said looking down at the man’s name tag. “Hiro Itadori? ‘Cuz if you do, your body goes boom. Understand?”

“Y-Yes Sir!” Hiro said as he looked to the ground with wide eyes as he felt himself break into a cold sweat. Bakugou patted the man’s back, causing him to flinch but when the hero walked away right after, Hiro calmed down. Unfortunately, that only lasted for about a second before you walked in.

“Hello Hiro!” You joyfully said. Your voice reached the ears of your ex-husband. Or more so, your “supposed to be” ex-husband. His ears perked up and he smirked as he hid behind a corner wall, taking the view of you in.

“Y/N.” He whispered to himself. He smiled and a blush bloomed on his porcelain skin as he admired you from afar. You were just as beautiful as he remembered. If anything, your looks seemed to have only gotten better. He watched as the man nervously greeted you and allowed you to go through with your workout. Katsuki smirked as he knew the man gave no hint at him being there, and so he would be able to watch you in peace.

Katsuki wasn’t there to keep tabs on your workout and what exercises you did. He was there just to watch you. Of course, while doing so, he admired you, but he was there to gain selfish intel. He watched you from start to end. Once you finished he followed you to your next location. It was still early and so it was safe to assume you weren’t heading to bed yet. He followed you back to your hotel and waited in another area until you walked out again. Sure enough, you did.

For the rest of the day, Bakugou followed and stalked your every move. He watched where you work, where you spent your free time, he followed you to the new cafe you seemed to enjoy, and then he followed you back to your hotel. Instead of waiting in another area and watching from afar, Bakugou climbed the side of the building and watched you from your hotel balcony through the glass door. He payed attention to your every move and noted what time you went to bed. Satisfied with the day’s revelations, he went back to his own home.

Knowing this information, Katsuki was able to sleep a little more peacefully. For the next few weeks, Katsuki followed this procedure. He became a full time stalker, even going so far as to call out of work for some time to put his full attention in you. He watched you like a hawk. He took note of everywhere you went, where you ate, who you spoke to, and what you did. All of it became engraved into his brain.

Now, Katsuki stood at your balcony for the umpteenth time as he stared at your sleeping form. It was deep into the night and with the moonlight on his back, he found enough courage and craze to open the door. He walked in quietly and shut the door, blocking the chilly air from seeping in to awaken your unconscious state. He approached your bed and crouched down to meet your face.

“Still as perfect as ever,” he whispered as he removed a few strands of hair out of your face. His touch didn’t seem to startle you and Katsuki took it as your body naturally indulging in his familiar touch. He blushed at the feeling of your oh so soft skin as his fingertips grazed your pillowy cheeks. His hand finally cupped the side of your face as his thumb drew circles along your skin. Your head unconsciously nuzzled into his warmth like it used to and Katsuki couldn’t help but smile. “Don’t worry Teddy Bear...I’ll bring you home soon.”

With that, Katsuki leaned down and softly placed a kiss on your lips. This was the lightest kiss he ever bestowed upon you. The pressure and weight was similar to a feather and the blonde struggled to restrain himself once he came in contact. He craved more but his mind knew better. Reluctantly, he pulled away and removed his hand from your face. He walked away, back to the balcony to take his leave but not before turning to look back at you. “Real soon.”

—

You woke up to a sense of familiarity in your room. Although you were alone, you could’ve sworn there was this chilling presence. It was faint but it was there. Taking in a breath and looking around at your surroundings, you reluctantly got out of bed and got ready for the day.

You did the usual. Got ready, got dressed, had breakfast, and went about your day. You went to the market to picked up a few things and ended up staying much longer than you liked. You walked in during daylight and came out when the sun was setting. You sighed in disappointment.

“Guess I can skip the gym this one time. I might as well get back home, read a book or two..” you went on talking to yourself about your schedule. You walked with the groceries in hand as you enjoyed the scenery on your way back, however, even with the shining sun creating it’s golden hour with a beautiful purple sky, you couldn’t help but feel wary of the stillness in the wind.

—

‘Where the fuck is she?!’ Bakugou thought to himself. He waited at the gym all damn day. He waited and waited to see your beautiful face but you never showed. If he had known that you would’ve skipped out on the gym today he wouldn’t have came here and wasted his time. Today was supposed to be the day. The day you came home.

Shaking off his negative thoughts, Bakugou continued with his backup plan. Although it would hurt his soul to bring harm to his precious princess, he reminded himself that he was doing this for her. He’s been so broken for the past months, he could only imagine how destroyed you must be. Hurting you was his way of helping you.

And so, Bakugou made his way to your hotel, where he found himself standing infront of your glass door at your balcony. To his dismay, you weren’t there. He released a huff before climbing down and once again, began to wait. He waited and waited in hiding, constantly on the lookout for you. It’s hard to find you in the city when you don’t follow your daily schedule, but knowing where you currently resided to get your rest made his job much easier.

Finally, after some time, he heard the familiar and comforting sound of your humming voice as you sang a little song to yourself. Bakugou took the sight of you in and blushed at your beauty from afar. He allowed himself to soak in the sound of your pretty voice before making his move. “Sorry Princess.”

—

You finally made it to the hotel. After your long stroll, you couldn’t wait to get some rest. Except, the closer you got, the more tense you became. You could feel the suspenseful aura in the air and your pace soon slowed down. Eventually, you came to a stop as your nerves got the best of you.

“Hello?” You said in the wind. You looked around and saw nothing but the pitch black night illuminated by the street lights and stars.

“Is someone there?” You asked again, turning your head another direction. Nothing but leaves in the wind. You released a sigh and continued your walk but became startled due to the sound of squirrels fighting in the trees.

“Ah!” You screamed and dropped your bag. After taking notice of the two animals going at it, you chuckled to yourself and turned to pick up your bag, unfortunately being startled once again at the sight of shoes in front of you. “AH!”

You jumped back in fear and took a fighting stance before you settled and relax at the sight of your supposed ex-husband. “Bakugou..it’s just you.”

“Mm, nope.” Bakugou said as he bent down to pick up your bag and hand it to you. “It’s Katsuki.”

His words sent your eyes rolling as you took your bag back with a hesistant hand. Something seemed..off.

“Not anymore. Thanks for the help. Bye.” You attempted to walk on to your hotel entrance but his arm stopped you.

“What? That’s it? Thanks? Bye?” Bakugou asked while gently pushing your body back in front of him. “We should talk, Y/N.”

“There’s nothing to talk abou-“

“There is.” Bakugou said with a firm voice, grabbing your full attention. Seeing your doe eyes look at him with caution caused him to settle. Bakugou sighed through his nose and allowed his hands to rest on your waist. “I miss you, Y/N. I want you to come back home.”

You shook your head at the idea and scrunched your eyes as you tried to step out of his hold. “Bakugou..”

“Hear me out, okay? It won’t be like last time, Teddy Bear-“

“You don’t know that-“

“I do. Because I’m going to try harder for you and I’m going to hold onto you and I’m not gonna ruin us for a second time. I still love you Y/N. I always have and I always will.” Bakugou sweetly said. You looked at him with the same eyes of caution before you placed your hands over his, giving him a sign of hope.

“I’m sorry, Bakugou,” you said, pulling his hands off of your waist. “I sent divorce papers. I don’t want to be with you anymore. I don’t love you anymore.”

“You don’t mean that.” Bakugou said with full confidence. Although you pulled his hands away from your waist, you still allowed him to keep a hold on your own hands.

“...I should.” You said looking down. With each word of denial, Bakugou took a step closer, invading your personal space. “You should get going-“

“No, Y/N-“

“Bakugou-“

“Baby. I know you still want me. I know you still love me and I know you’re excited that I’m back. I love you...and you love me. So just admit it.” He said, inches away from your face. You stared in his eyes with a look of longing...and a hint of love. He was right. You did still love him. But after the neglect and harm he’s brought you, you didn’t know if you did want to go back. You didn’t know.

Sensing your hesistation, Bakugou slowly moved in to close the gap between you two. His hands let go off yours as he wrapped his arms around your waist. His face inched closer to yours and when you didn’t stop him, he continued. Finally, he gently placed his lips upon your own and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel something again. His kisses always brought a comforting feeling of butterflies in your stomach and after a second of feeling his warm lips, you kissed him back. Your hands found way around his neck as you pulled him in deeper and you could feel Bakugou smile into the kiss. It was hot and passionate. You were out in the open but for a moment it felt like no one else in the world existed. You would’ve gotten lost in the kiss had it not been for you remembering the situation you were in with the man.

Reluctantly, you gently pushed Bakugou off of you, but he still managed to press his forehead to your own. “Katsuki...you should go home.”

“Not without you.” He softly said. You shook your head as you completely pushed him off of you and gathered your things.

“Please...just go.” You said and began to walk away but Bakugou held onto your arm to stop you from moving any further.

“I’m not leaving without you, Y/N. Come home.” He stated.

“Bakugou! Just leave!” You shouted as you turned to him. When you faced the blonde man, you were shocked to see a crazed smile decorating his face.

“Too bad. I’m not asking Y/N. I’m telling. You’re coming home with me. Tonight.” He said and you scoffed at him with slight fear.

“You’re crazy!” You said and tried to shake his hold off of you, but of course failed.

“About you? Yes.” He said as he pulled you in closer. You squirmed against his hold until he pressed you in his chest and kept you in his grasp. You continued to fight against him but he grabbed your face with one hand to force you to stop and look at him.

“Let me go!”

“Listen! You either come home with me the easy way..or my way.” He warned. You looked at him with fear laced all around your face as you watched his insane side surface. You began to squirm again and fight once more.

“I’m not going!” You spat. Bakugou just released a simple laugh before caressing the side of your face.

“Yes. You are.” With that, the gentle hand on the side of your face formed into a first as he swung and knocked you out. You dropped unconscious in his hold and Bakugou was quick to carry you princess style and walk away, abandoning your groceries on the sidewalk.

“Shoulda listened. Cant believe you forced me to hurt you like that, baby.” Bakugou spoke to your unconscious state as he walked back home through dead city streets. “Don’t worry though, I’ll take care of you once we make it back. And then, we’ll never be apart again. I promise.”

—

You awoke to chains being locked on your wrist that were tied against a headboard. You layed on a large mattress in a dark room with a dim light. As you looked around, you recognized the familiar place. The place you used to make love for hours with your ex-husband. The place where movie dates and cuddle sessions were a must. The place you locked yourself in before leaving your last relationship. Katsuki’s bedroom.

You tried to jump out of bed but the restraints pulled you back down. You tried to scream and only muffled sounds could be heard. Katsuki taped your mouth shut. You tried using your quirk but it didn’t work. You looked to your restraints and saw the cuffs he used to hold you were quirk restraining cuffs. With nothing else to do, you tossed and turned in the bed as you allowed the muffled sounds to be as loud as they could. Eventually, the ruckus you were making brought the attention of your captor. Katsuki Bakugou.

Hearing all the noise, Bakugou busted opened the door to be met with your frustrated and teary eyes. You glared at him as he smirked at your locked up state. He took the opportunity to walk up to you and caress your face.

“I’m so sorry I had to hit you baby,” he said leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead. “But you left me with no choice. All you had to do was come home on your own free will and I wouldn’t have had to do all that.”

You began to tremble with anger and fear as you stared up at the man. Your teary eyes challenged his insane rubies as he sat on the side of the bed.

“How does it feel to be back? Hm?” He asked, ripping off the tape. You groaned at the pain and grew sick as you saw Bakugou pervertedly lick his lips at the sound. You leaned back and huffed with heavy breath before answering him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! Let me go!” You screamed. He only looked at you in confusion as another sinister smile took place on his lips.

“Why would I do that, Teddy Bear?” He asked, allowing his thumb to create sweet and soft circles on your cheek.

“I don’t want you anymore Katsuki! I don’t want to be with you!” Bakugou merely raised a brow at your words and continued to listen. “You burned me-“

*SMACK*

You looked at the man in front of you with fear and shock written on your face. Your cheek stung as your face now turned to the side but Bakugou quickly changed that by taking you by your chin to make you face him and wrapped a hand around your neck, chocking you. You gasped for air as Bakugou’s smirk became replaced with a frown and his brows became pointed.

“How dare you?! You’re asking what’s wrong with me but what the hell is wrong with you?! You left me, for months, Y/N. I was heartbroken. I was basically dead with you gone. I did you a fucking favor bringing you back. If I was so fucked, I can only imagine how horrible you must’ve been feeling. You’re lucky I came and save you. Saved us. And now, we can be happy again.” He explained.

“K-...Katsuki-..p-please!” You forced out, trying to beg for air.

“SHUT UP! I saved you, Y/N. So don’t even try to mention the little accident that happened so long ago, baby. Now you can forgive me. And don’t worry..I’m ready to listen to all the apologies you surely have for me...even if I have to choke them out of you.” He seethed with his hand tightening. Your eyes began to pop as the blood flow began to fill your face. Your eyes turned red as you struggled for air.

“I-...I-I’m..K-Katsuki! ...I’m sorry!” You shouted as best as you could. Luckily for you, the second you did, Bakugou’s hand lost its grip and simply rested on your neck. You choked and coughed as you relished in the sweet taste of oxygen. He smiled and leaned down to give your lips a sweet peck to shut you up and tapped your cheek before he walked to the door. Before leaving, he turned around to look at you and give you your official welcome back.

“I’m glad you’re home, baby. Can’t believe you really tried leaving. You’re mine, Y/N. And you always will be....don’t forget it.”

He slammed the door shut, walking away from the room with a smile. And you?

You cried.

A/N: Back by popular demand, we have part 2 to “What Have I Done.” How was it? In my opinion the beginning SUCKED! But I promise it’ll get better! The story will focus on Y/N and Bakugou’s new lives now so stay tuned and I hope you guys enjoyed it!

Tag list: @captainchrisstan @jazzylove @bakugous-trauma @konohahoee @whatdidshesayyy @chibiiichann @lover-of-helios @unicornlover25 @tamakisropebunny @iliketobullydeku @peacchfuz @fairybnha3 @ebiharachan @levimeko @5sos-wdw @naluciosa @anime-weeb-bnha @bakucumsackslut @asteria-obey-me

[matan4il]

I have been opening tumblr every single day waiting for your new post since I found out about your account because I love the logical of your posts unlike most of the Buddie shippers I have seen and may I ask you a question? After Buck and Eddie talked about the ghosting Eddie gave Buck in season 3 episode 6, they hugged but only for a awkwardly short time then Eddie pushed Buck away and Buck face was like “why are you pushing me away?”. So the question is that what do you think why Eddie pushed Buck back and even grunt doing that?

Sorry if I made any mistakes because English isn’t my first language so if there are some mistakes, please forgive me. And I just wanted to say that I love you and your account and your posts so much❤️❤️❤️

Hello and OMG, thank you! That is SO sweet of you to say, you're honestly too kind, but I am BEYOND happy that you enjoy the stuff I put out there, and I hope you continue to! I'm sending so much love right back to you and thank you for filling my day with light! Also, don't apologize about your English, it's great and you're awesome, and I'm so, so thankful you sent this ask! xoxox

Oh, regarding the 306 hug, Eddie during that ep was still fighting in those illegal fights, which means his body was covered in bruises. When Buck hugs him, the bruises hurt him, so even though he clearly wants the hug to continue, he pulls back.

Now, since we're discussing this, I have to point out a few things that are ESSENTIAL in that scene IMO:

1. Out of all the people around Eddie, on screen we only see Buck noticing that something's wrong before the reveal in 308, and I for one loved that.

2. Eddie and Buck's hugs are canonically implied here to be usually longer, because if they weren't, Buck wouldn't have known it's weird that Eddie is pulling back so quickly. Also, even though we have only had 3 on-screen hugs, clearly they have hugged enough times to establish a pattern for Buck to know what is and isn't weird for Eddie to do when they hug. I'M IN MY FEELS THINKING ABOUT THIS.

Thank you again, lovely! And please feel free to send more asks whenever you'd like! xoxox

(To anyone else who sent me an ask, I am going through all of them, thank you so much for your patience! If you wanna check whether I’ve replied to yours yet, you can have a look at my ask tag. xoxox)

[oh-you--pretty-things]

The Split update!!!

So no surprise I caved and I’ve just finished the 3rd and FINAL series of the split!! 🙁

I’ll add my thoughts here in a few days because I’m about to hit play on a rewatch! 😂

Update--

 I am REALLY going to miss Hannah Defoe, it’s crazy how I've been feeling since I finished series 3. I just need to curl up in a dark room so I can begin to feel a little normal. Nicola Walker is just too good; I just don’t understand what she’s done to me!! Cheers Nicola...  

Anyway, nobody wants to hear any more about me. Let's ramble about The Split.  

It's probably spoiler free, but just in case!

So, I didn’t really know what to expect from the final series, I tried my best to stay away from every bit of promotional media beforehand. The first couple of episodes I was a little worried about Hannahs character development (granted there was a lot going on in the first two eps) but thankfully things did get better.  

A lot of people seemed to be willing Hannah and Nathan to get back together but I wasn’t really in that boat, I mean he’s already cheated on her and while they were on a ‘break’ or before deciding on the divorce he’d already got a girlfriend and got her pregnant, ok not intentionally, but still. Now that’s not to say that Nathan didn’t love Hannah I really think he does and she him, but I felt like they were coming to a natural end, Hannah seemed reluctant to let go probably due to the fact that Nathan is all she’s really known and didn't want her children to experience the distant father figure like she did, which lead her to hold a little resentment towards her father and most men for the majority of her life. I think as time went on, she knew that she was going to be able to do it differently for her kids and that allowed her to make that decision.  

Hannah was always wanting reassurances from Nathan that he wouldn’t turn out to be just like her dad. That has always seemed to be the main worry for Hannah of all men, except maybe for Christie, which is weird. That may be down to the fact they have quite a deep rooted friendship, this is me just surmising as we don’t really know that much about their younger years although Hannah does seem freer with him, she seems her true self so it’s maybe showing how comfortable she is with him, hinting again to a deep friendship. I’ve been on the Christie boat since season 1 and got really pissed off when they basically ruined his character in the second part of series 2, it was totally not him and just didn’t seem right but maybe it had to go down that route for the explosive s2 ending. Anyway, I was so happy to get the old Christie back for series 3. Christie has been in love with Hannah for over 20 years, there is absolutely no denying it and I think it has always been there for Hannah as well, but she done a better job at suppressing it than Christie. Now it’s probably more down to Nicola and Barry but together they are absolutely electric, between Hannah and Nathan there is deep devotion but maybe not that real spark. That’s maybe a factor on why she marries Nathan and not christie, she sees Nathan as the safer choice, less chance of getting hurt.  

There is so much more to talk about, but this is getting a little incoherent because really, I need to rewatch the 3 series and take notes which probably won’t happen!  

Anyway, hope Christie is getting on ok while he’s packing up his life in New York and making his way back to London for Hannah.  

I’ve missed so much out! I also need to hear what everyone else is thinking but nobody is talking about it! 🙁  

Don't want to say goodbye to the Defoes!

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

May 2021 Wk 3

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

It’s a cray cray Friday when Vietnam gets its eng subs up before GMMTV Thailand. What alter-reality are we in? Well, the Vietnamese offerings are better right now anyway. (Oooo, feel that burn.) 

Ongoing Series - Thai

Top Secret Together Ep 2 - pulping it up in the best possible way. Sure sound and production values are pants, and in classic Thai fashion the editing in post is exacerbating (rather than fixing) pacing issues, but it’s still CUTE AF. I don’t even mind the added university storyline, because they’ve got good chemistry (and a confident gay fresher after a panicked gay hazer is an old favorite... what can I say, SOTUS was my first love). We aren’t spending too much time with any one couple, so it’s weighted a lot better than Brothers was, but also character development is slow. 

Siew Sum Noi Ep 2 - Unfortunately, it’s just too hard to find, plus no subs. I’m dropping it in the hopes it comes back on my radar some day. 

Y-Destiny Ep 8 - (Thurs) It’s rough having a ghost boyfriend, half your friends are scared, the other half think you’re crazy, and kissing shortens your lifespan. This was a cute couple even if I wasn’t wild about the surrounding story. 

Close Friend Ep 5: (Dear My Star/JimmyTommy) - about high school penpals. It had to rely entirely on voice over work as the actors only meet face to face at the end. It’s a good thing they are appealing screen presences on their own, with good vocal control. It’s hard to imagine any other BL pair carrying this kinda plot. It’s by far my favorite of the series so far, and I’m not even a big JimmyTommy fan. 

Fish Upon The Sky Ep 7 - no subs. Do we care? Not really. Because we have... 

Nitiman Ep 3 - currently my favorite out of Thailand. It’s the university Thai BL i’ve been waiting for since... when was the last good one? My Engineer? Yowza. Anyway we got: head on my shoulder, baby is a floppy drunk (but still wants to be in control), proximity alert, boyfriend’s closet, seme gets seriously jelly, and a cute twist on feeding him. There’s something fun and complex about Jin’s character. He’s not a panicked bi. He knows exactly what’s going on, he just hasn’t decided if he wants Bb or not. He clearly enjoys being looked after, the compliments, and the attention, but he’s not sure if he’s going to like what happens if he gives in. I like that twist on the usual tsundere uke archetype a lot, cautious rather than willfully obtuse or freaked out. We can see Jin realizing in stages: I like this person, I like that they like me, I like the romantic attentiveness. But in the background is... do I actually want to f*k him? It’s a dynamic we don’t often see on BL. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 10 fin - the most ridiculous show using BLs worst tropes in a sort of weird smoothie of bitter greens and too ripe banana. The ending was the sappiest cheesiest thing ever, like cheese syrup tapped from the cheese tree. So of course I loved it, but I’m pretty sure I giggled through all the bits meant to be profound. Because, in the end, to tolerate this show at all, you just can’t take ANY of it seriously. RECOMMENDED (with some SERIOUS reservations and trigger warnings.) Full review here. 

Be Loved in House: I Do (Taiwan) Ep 1-2 - I don’t mind a damaged seme character but this one is a bit weird for me. Like creepy Cheese in the Trap level weird. On the bright side, the story has given our tsundere uke good motivation for his angst and great existing friendships, loyalty, and likability. Plus I’m invested in the cafe owner/innocent puppy side dishes. So if it’s only the seme character I’m not jiving with, and he’s the most established actor, it should all turn out fine. I believe in you, Taiwanese BL. 

Papa & Daddy (Taiwan) Ep 6 fin - speaking of belief. This such a good show but they gave us a cliffhanger ending. Now we must hope against hope for season two. That’s never guaranteed with Taiwan tho. So, I’m docking a few points and saying, RECOMMENDED so long as you realize it’s a cliffhanger. 

Love is Science? (Taiwan) Ep 1-9 (BL subplot) - this is a good het romance, but the fact that the BL subplot is a beautifully acted disaster bi + confident gay means you’re hearing about it whether you want to or not. Plus they just added in some GL! Come on! I gotta support Taiwan normalizing queer to this extent. They are fighting the good fight and if I also have to watch a career lady and her much younger softest straight boi get it on, too? Twist my arm with that service sub subtext. Go on Taiwan, TWIST IT. It’s on Viki. Join the revolution.   * Incidentally if you actually like the D/s het dynamic of this show, I highly recommend Japanese Kimi wa Petto - career woman keeps a hot young dancer boy as a pet. Oh yes, an actual pet, that IS the pitch. Never doubt Japan when kink is on the line. It’s also on Viki. Go get your kink on, thank me later. (If it helps: That was not a request.)  

Most Peaceful Place 2 (Vietnam) Ep 2 (AKA 5) - love triangles aren’t my thing, but if you’re gonna do it short form, by all means bring in the lead’s other BL pairing so the chemistry is on point. Now I've no idea who I want him to end up with. Can’t they just be in a poly triad? 

My Lascivious Boss (Vietnam) Ep 7 - I’m still enjoying it a lot. It’s still unabashedly queer and the tension is ramping up. We now have secret identity, blackmail, femme fatale, faen fatale, and incoming seme confrontation. Best of all, the series is still airing, which makes it longer than any other Vietnamese BL I’ve seen (aside from Tein Bromance - which is just too weird to count). 

Gossip - Thai BL 

SEVEN PROJECT TEASERS

No one is entirely sure what Studio Wabi Sabi’s Seven Project/7Project will entail. 

It might be like Close Friend (1 episode per couple, no linking), 

or Y-Destiny (2 episodes per couple, loosely linked), 

or The En of Love (4 episodes per couple, linked but independent consecutive stories). 

They’re giving the couple’s arcs separate titles. So each one would be what? Seven Project: Once Upon a Time or the like? We’re in Taiwanese title territory people and NO ONE WANTS TO GO THERE. Anygay... 

Once Upon a Time is the BounPrem (og UWMA) anchor story, and seems to be the most dramatic and likely saddest. These two can handle most of what’s thrown at them at this juncture, so it should be good. 

Vs Love is a BoomPeak (og Make it Right) university vehicle. Since I thought Boom was done with our nonsense, I couldn’t be more thrilled and surprised this pair is doing another show together. I don’t think either of them are the greatest actors but I find Peak very endearing and Boom charismatic on screen, so I’ll watch. 

Would You be My Love is the hotly anticipated SantaEarth launch. They’re a (cultivated) IRL ship and Earth is an established BL actor. They have great chemistry and high energy so this could be lots of fun. 

We are also getting a GL from this series from established BL actresses Samantha and Pineare. Nothing teased yet on that, but I’m looking forward to this installment the most. Also curious to see how the ladies handle the branding and promo side, not to mention the culture. (Thailand variety shows gonna force *girls* to play the Pepero game?) 

Secret Crush on You upcoming Thai BL with no release date, co-produced by and featuring (but NOT staring) Saint and directed by Cheewin (sigh) with all fresh faces. (Previously known as Stalker the series.) It looks like pure pulp and I’m not wild about the plot but could be better than expected as it’s adapted from a novel. Cheewin is an okay director when he has an actual story to follow. 

Don’t Say No the series. Coming from the producers of TharnType this is the JaFirst vehicle many have been waiting for. Friends to lovers + a good boy/bad boy pairing on a sports romance foundation. It’s basketball so they tapped Meen as well (he’s semi-pro). The bad news? You get one guess as to who is writing the darn thing? Yep it’s MAME. So, ya know, expect some slam dunk kidnapping, a light dribbling of rape, and me turning into a basketcase. AKA... 

Will I have to live blog this series in order to survive it? That seems to be the only way I can. So probably. Which means the bad sports puns will continue. Look, if I’m suffering, SO ARE YOU! 

Rumors of a new YinWar vehicle The Best Story (mini series) coming in July. Also rumors that their previously announced Love Mechanics (full length series) has either been delayed, is facing money issues, or is moving studios, or all three. 

Breaking News 

DELAYED (I’m talking these three off the watch list until we get new airing dates) 

Love Area’s release was pushed out but it got a trailer. 

Golden Blood was supposed to drop Weds but comments in MDL report that it is delayed due to C19.  

Love’s Outlet (Taiwan) is supposed to have started a 50 episode run (only 3-5 min each, what utter nonsense). Sadly, this delay is due to a surge in cases in Taiwan which was doing so well, but also doesn’t have many inoculations. 

Bad Buddy has started workshopping at GMMTV actual. 

Kang Insoo’s BTS for Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding is SO FLIPPING CUTE. You have to watch it. Trust me, I don’t rec behind the scenes stuff often. 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International accessibility reasons.

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

[shijiujun]

hey so uh, it's 110% Not Your Job, but can i ask for like a crash course on these chinese bl series that are everywhere around me but i don't know them. like i'm familiar with the untamed or however many names it has but i'm seeing two or three more???? help please if you can thank you

hello!! oh no worries, i happened to be looking for a distraction too so this was timely hahaha although it’s a pretty broad question since there are so many new live adaptations coming out (and some which have already come out which are featured as bromances), but let me see if I can like round this up for you a little. 

*i may be giving you a bit more than you need or like irrelevant stuff, but i guess i’m bound to hit something hahaha

Okay so the chinese BL series you’re talking about is The Untamed, and since you said you’re familiar I won’t get into it in detail, BUT just for like flow’s sake:

The Untamed (Chen Qing Ling) is based on the danmei (BL) novel written by MXTX, called Mo Dao Zu Shi (and yes however many like English translations to this title there is), or MDZS for short. You watched the live-action, and there’s like a lot of other versions of it e.g. the anime, the chibi anime, audio dramas etc. etc. the list goes on. In case you still haven’t seen any of those, just glance through this masterpost made by @the-social-recluse​ - In any case, right now everything is sort of already out EXCEPT:

MDZSQ - chibi donghua, cutest shit you’ll ever see

More MDZS merch 

Some teasers from MDZS mobile game which has been one year and developing

Now moving on to other BL series floating around so frequently - MDZS is the second book that MXTX wrote. So there’s SVSSS (The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving-System), which is also called lovingly by others in the fandom by Scumbag System/Villain in short, this is MXTX’s first danmei novel. Right now if you’ve seen this on Tumblr, it’s the anime (donghua) version - 10 episodes only for Season 1, available on WeTV with subs, finished airing like a few weeks ago. Translations of the novel are definitely out in full somewhere.

An absolute mess, but an organized one

Tried to do a manhua but failed

Everyone thought the donghua wouldn’t air on time either (it has a history of dropping development halfway) but it did

Would probably be the most entertaining if ever dealt with a live-action

And then there’s arguably, the most beloved child out of all three novels (at least right this moment) - TGCF (Tian Guan Ci Fu, or Heaven Official’s Blessing). This is the third and so far last (???) danmei novel MXTX has written, main pairing invented love. Strawhat-wearing scrap collector smiley angel with devoted kid-turned-adult-turned-ghost-king who follows smiley angel for like many years because he loves him. Anyway, if you’re seeing this, once again on Tumblr a lot, it’s the donghua version you’re seeing. Still airing, I think we’re midway through the whole season, the yelling starts Saturday (Asia time zone) and then extends into Sunday, sometimes Monday.

There’s like a god-tier Eng translation in full for TGCF by Suika

There is a manhua for this as well, only like 45 chapters in, but the time Jan/Feb 2021 rolls around, the donghua would have overtaken the manhua progress on the storyline HAHAHA

Apparently the director/production team who did CQL/The Untamed managed to get the rights to filming its live-action, but heh nothing much about that just yet aside from casting rumours and fans worrying that the casting will be done wrongly and also that they won’t be able to do justice to the story.

Alright now that we’ve more or less cleared MXTX and what everyone is hyping over (for good reason), let’s move on to the other CHINESE BL stuff you could be seeing (although I feel like you might not actually be asking about this), and these will all be live-actions (I’m also only clearing SOME of this year’s stuff, so none from before 2020, don’t ask me why I didn’t leave Guardian or SCI up here):

✨✨✨ Already aired, done and dusted or maybe ongoing, just ones I see on my dash and notifs so I definitely am biased ✨✨✨

The Sleuth of Ming Dynasty (Cheng Hua’s Fourteenth Year) - Many episodes, much bromance, base novel is gay af, but live action is cute af. Read more here and full translation is not yet done I think

My Roommate is a Detective - THIS IS A SPECIAL MENTION. NOT BL. Doesn’t even have like a book to go along with it, it’s just I’ve seen people getting into this again and creating content, so idk, imma just leave this here. It ain’t BL but it got the most glaring BL-esque relationship I’ve ever seen in my life. You’ll get what I mean if you watch it

The Lost Tomb Reboot - AGAIN another special mention, because many handsome young-ish men who you know, head into tombs, much bromance. Based on a huge series of novels, totally not BL, but as always with like a lot of men put into one story, ships happen. This year as well, in case you’ve seen it floating around

✨✨✨  Upcoming Chinese BL live-action adaptations, confirmed + casting + filming. You may have seen some of these because like posters were recently released etc. - As far as I know these are all slated for 2021 ✨✨✨

Faraway Wanderers (Tian Ya Ke) - A danmei novel by Priest, filming wrapped up, should be airing soon. Leads are pretty cute, although I’m sure they’ll turn this bromance. One of the male leads is known for a lot of period web dramas, and Gong Jun, the other male lead, is known for more contemporary modern dramas, but damn Gong Jun’s jawline

Winner is King (Sha Po Lang) - Another danmei novel by Priest, filming wrapped up recently as well if I recall? Posters recently released, and this is arguably Priest’s most famous and popular danmei

Immortality (Hao Yi Xing) - A super popular danmei novel called 2ha or The White Husky and His White Cat Shizun by Meat Bun. Filming also... wrapped? I think, because posters came out the next day and everyone from Earth to Pluto went mad, definitely one you should look out for next year spring i think, but I’m pretty sure there’s gonna be a hell lot more teasers, posters etc. coming up and then half of danmei Tumblr will probably go into cardiac arrest

The Society of Four Leaves (Zhang Gong An) - Ehhhh I think this hasn’t yet been filmed but casting was recently confirmed (contentiously).  Concept posters are up though. This technically isn’t classified officially as a BL. There are no CPs officially in the novel, but apparently it’s very like idk flirty etc., also slated for next year

*There are a few more by Priest, e.g. Liu Yao, but no concrete news that I’ve seen (by now like at least 60% of her danmeis either have a live-action contract or a donghua contract or both lmao)

✨✨✨  Upcoming Chinese BL donghua adaptations (2021-ish). All by Priest✨✨✨

*Throwing this in just as a by the way thing, because these are also recent news (these two weeks). There might be more but I haven’t seen anything yet personally :D

Imperfection (Can Ci PIn) - Space AU, the novel won like two national literary awards if I recall like last year? Anyway a brief trailer recently came out last week I think, and main lead is handsome af, and once again it’s space and space wars so it’s pretty cool

Silent Reading (Mo Du Zhe) - Novel is called Mo Du, and honestly I think the donghua has been like teasing fans for like idk years, but it looks like we’re finally getting to the donghua as the team previewed the first ep like... two weeks ago live to an audience? Modern crime thriller thing, there’s a masterpost going on Tumblr

Lie Huo Jiao Chou - Another Priest fan favourite, a historical + modern danmei combination. Much angst from what I’ve seen, but donghua teaser looked good also, released also last week

---

anyway hopefully some part of this or at least one part answers your question? if not, just send me another ask or like, DM me hahahaha

[prettylittlebutterflie]

It All Started With A Break

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31840603

Okay, so I have fallen down the rabbit hole known as MariBat and I just can't stop all the ideas I have because of this and decided that enough is enough and I am doing it.

This is my very first fanfic - or any fic actually - but I hope you guys like it and be WARNED that some of you may find some part of this story that's similar with another and that may've been because I really liked the idea when I read it and wanna have a kinda similar thing here and the same goes with some trope of this fanfic in the future, but I'll do my best to keep it unique. I am also new to the DCU, but I'm doing research and planning to binge watch stuff and if you could please help this poor soul find a way to navigate and somehow get an idea on how that universe work (especially abt the batfam), I'll be forever grateful to thy savior.

This fic is canon until S4 Ep 1&2 (Truth & Lie) of MLU and as for the rest, I'll let you guys know.

So yeah, that's all. Enjoy and hope you guys like it. (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

P.S. Sorry I kinda ranted, this is my first time actually posting smth so bear with me people

SYNOPSIS

It’s been four years ever since Hawkmoth, who now goes by the name Shadow Moth, began his reign of terror in Paris. Four years worth of akumas that have brought pain and suffering. Four years of no rest in controlling their emotions, afraid of what may come if they were controlled.

After four long years, the Miraculous Team can finally see a ray of light. Everything they have sacrificed for that one goal they all share is finally going to be repaid… Not.

Locating Hawkmoth was easier said than done, and the frustration is finally getting to them. With that, it was decided that they need a break from their hero lives — ok, maybe not. After all, Shadow Moth is proving himself to be a workaholic (like dude, don’t you have anything better to do than destroy everyone’s schedule?) — but anyways, it was clear. THEY. NEED. A. BREAK. Away from Paris. Away from Hawkmoth. Away from the frickin akumas.

So yeah, that’s how it was decided (more like forced) that they are going to America to relax, let loose, and have some fun. After all, who knows, maybe a break is all they need to get things to start getting better — or worse.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

PROLOGUE

“Alright. So, we are going to take a break—”

“For two months.”

“For two months. And because it’s supposed to be a break, that means—”

“No thinking of anything Moth related.”

“No thinking of anything Moth rela— Moth related?”

“You know, Hawkmoth, Red Moth, Shadow Moth, those Moths.”

“Right. Moths. Aside from Moths, it also means—’

“No thinking of akumas.”

“No thinking of akumas. For this entire break, we’re not going to think about—”

“Anything Miraculous related.”

“Anything Miraculous related. Alya, do you really need to do that every time I’m about to say it?”

“It’s because she knows you. We know you. It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous, how you always promise not to worry about something, especially anything Miraculous related, just to break it the moment anything related to it comes up. So, yes. She needs to say it and repeat it as much as possible for it to go through that head of yours.”

“Guys, I swear, I’m really going to follow through with this plan. I did agree that we need to unwind ourselves since we’re getting way too stressed and that won’t help us focus on our job.”

“Only after we bugged you about it. Get it? Bugged. Pfft—”

“Hey! Puns are my thing. And you shouldn’t be saying it like that. You’re making it ape-solutely obvious and that makes it not punny anymore”

“Dude, do you really have to do that? That’s so not paw-some. Pfft—”

“All puns aside, it is true that we had to convince you, Mari-hime, to agree on taking a break. Although I rarely take a break from fencing, my Mother and I are aware of the importance of having one and may I also remind you that you were the one who taught us that.”

“And that’s why I told you guys to go have one.”

“But you plus the kitty are the ones who need it the most. Remember what future-me said? About you two always leading us and how she— or rather I am the last one called upon? That means you guys are always gonna work while the rest of us may or may not be needed in some fights.”

“There is a 97.6% probability of you two showing up in fights.”

“Because we have to. It’s our responsibility as the one leading our team.”

“M’lady’s right. Besides, there were only the two of us in the beginning and with all the akumas, we just got used to it.”

“But that doesn’t mean you don’t need to rest. The music I’m hearing from both of you is filled with the stress you guys have and it doesn’t sound nice. Maybe you two unwinding will help make it more beautiful and even more powerful than before.”

“Fine. We’re all taking a break—”

“Especially you and Adrien.”

“Especially Adrien and I, for a month. Now, does anyone have any ideas on how we're gonna do that?”

“Ooh! Me, me! I have a competition coming up this summer break so I can’t really go anywhere too far since I have some training to do.”

“I’m sticking with the ape. Gotta keep an eye on him if I don’t want him messing up with the timeline. Plus, it’ll be pretty fun beating him up every time he asks for a challenge.”

“Hey!”

“The same goes for me. Someone has to make sure the correct time is recorded with not a single millisecond of it missed. Kwami knows how many times he messes it up whenever he does the recording himself.”

“Okay. So Kim, Alix, and Max will be staying in Paris. Are you guys sure that you’ll be able to take a break even if you’re in the city?”

“Yeah, we're fine. And I am totally beating you next time, little bunny.”

“Whatever. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming, y’know.”

“Anything else?”

“Oh, I have an internship in America this coming summer. The one at the Daily Planet. I just got the email and I was finally given an invite!”

“Really? Cool! Told you you’ll get it, babe!”

“Yeah! That’s really awesome, Alya! So I’m assuming you'll be accepting that?”

“You got it, girl! I mean, this is the Daily Planet we’re talkin’ about. I’ll learn so much about writing and journalism there, I’ve just got to take it.”

“So Alya’s going to America. Anyone else with plans outside of the country?”

“There will be an upcoming world-class fencing competition this summer and Mother and I have discussed my participation in it. It will be held in the States as well, specifically Gotham, two weeks before the end of the summer break. Maybe you should participate in it as well, Adrien. That way, you’ll have an excuse for your father to leave the country. I’m sure Mother will be happy to convince him as well to let you participate in it. That way, at the very least, I’ll have someone I know who’ll be an actual challenge.”

“Really? That actually sounds great! I’m sure Father would agree if your mother’s the one who suggested it. Thanks Kagami!”

“Okay. Kagami and hopefully Adrien will have a fencing competition in America too.”

“My Dad is having a tour in America right now. He’ll be having the last one at Metropolis during the summer break. He actually wants me to go with him, but I declined. It’ll be great if we all could go there and see it.”

“Dude, that’s so cool! Maybe you’ll even get to perform with your dad on stage. You did make that song with him that reached the record chart’s top. I’ve even made a playlist based on it.”

“Okay then, that makes Alya, Kagami, Adrien, and Luka going to the States. Chloe, do you also have plans to go there this summer? Maman said your mother was thinking of inviting you to be one of the models in an upcoming fashion show there.”

“She did mention something like that, but I wasn’t really paying attention to details once I found out that it’ll be outside of Paris. I’ll discuss it with her again then I can have my much needed vacation in the States.”

“So now that makes five of you going to America. Nino?”

“Well, I don’t really have any plans this summer. Just chill out and relax, y’know, make some playlist, listen to some music.”

“Ooh! How about you come with us, babe? That’ll be so cool and not all of us will be doing something most of the time while we’re there. You can just chill and relax there and maybe you could even study the kind of music they listen to and make a playlist out of it.”

“I would love to go, but I don’t think I really got the money for it. ‘Sides, my parents might not allow me to go out of the country.”

“You’re already 18 and if your parents ever say no, just tell them that you want to really relax, without keeping your emotions in check and have the freedom to let it out. I’m sure they’ll understand and unlike my Father, they actually listen to you.”

“As for the money, I have some savings and if you want I can lend you some-”

“But-”

“Lend. I’m not just giving it to you. You will have to pay me back, alright? And if you try to say no again, I’m going to insist that you don’t pay me anymore.”

“You sure? You're the best! Thanks, Minette.”

“No problem. So now that makes six of them—”

“Seven.”

“What?”

“Seven. We’re including you.”

“Me? But Alya, I already got plans this summer.”

“Plans? What plans?”

“I was planning on working on my commissions this summer an— Guys, can you all stop rolling your eyes on me and no, Chloe. I don’t need you doing it again.”

“Girl! We all agreed that we’re going to take a break this summer. How does doing your commissions sound like a break to you?”

“You all got your own thing to do this summer and mine just happens to be those. Also, the break was for anything Miraculous related. My commissions don't exactly fall under that.”

“Nope. We actually all agreed that for you, commissions should be added to the list of things you get to take a break from.”

“Adrien! I thought you’re supposed to be my partner? So much for the two of us against the world.”

“He is still your partner alright. But also, as someone who truly cares about you, he decided that you really needed a break. And besides girl, this could be your chance!”

“Chance? What chance?”

“Your pen pal! Doesn’t he live in Gotham? You could go and finally meet him. Who knows? Maybe something might happen.”

“Ooh, he’s from there? That’s awesome! You should totally go meet him. Maybe you could even go on a date or two-”

“A date?! Kim, he’s just a frie-”

“You stop right there, Dupain-Cheng! It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous! All of us already had enough with Adrikins always calling you ‘just a friend’ when it’s pretty obvious how totally untrue that statement was. We don’t need you ending up just like him, thank you very much.”

“But he really is-”

“Yeah right. If he really is just a friend, then why do you guys stay up all night talking to each other? You always immediately check your phone whenever a notif comes up and you smile like a love-sick fool whenever you read his messages for you. And don’t get me started on the way you gush about him non-stop.”

“There is something beautiful in your music whenever you talk or even think about him.”

“Your smiles are much brighter compared to before the two of you got to know each other.”

“Markov and I also have a record of your heartbeat and we have observed your heart beating faster whenever we talk about this certain topic.”

“And it's been more than a year since you two have become pen pals. The two of you are now so close that it’s a wonder why you guys still haven’t video-called each other just because you insist for your first time seeing each other to be in person.”

“I think it’s rather romantic. They’ll look into each other’s eyes for the first time then BAM! They’re finally together. But I still plan on giving him a shovel talk the first chance I get. Can’t have him break my twin’s heart without him knowing I have the god of destruction on my side.”

“What do you mean shovel talk- I mean, what even gives you the idea that he thinks of me that way for you guys to assume that we’ll end up in… in that kind of relationship?”

“He’d be an idiot if he still hasn’t fallen in love with you.”

“Literally almost everyone I know had a crush on you or have you forgotten already that my boyfriend’s one of those people?”

“I know for a fact that that’s true since I’ve already admitted that one of my reasons why I began bullying you back then was because I had a crush on you.”

“I must admit, I think I also had the same feeling towards you at the beginning of our friendship until I really got to know Luka and you helped us get together.”

“Oh! There’s also that. Do you actually know just how many people you’ve helped get together, buginette? Alya’s even written an article about it at the Ladyblog of how you are also known as Paris’s own cupid and how all of the couples you’ve paired ended up living a happy life together.”

“Everyone’s been saying how Ladybug’s the next best person they can go to if they ever want to find love after Andre.”

“And yet every time you try to pair yourself with someone, the magic just doesn’t seem to work.”

“So we all decided that we’ll be Ladybug’s cupid and pair her up with the boy she just can’t seem to get off of her head.”

“Now, you coming or what? I won’t be taking the money you’ll be lending me if you say no. I’m only going with these dudes if you also come or else I’ll just end up getting bored when there’s no one who can go around the city with me.”

“...”

“““...”””

“Fine. You guys win—”

“““YES!”””

“So here’s the final plan for the break. Kim, Alix, and Max will be staying in Paris for Kim’s competition, while the rest of us will be going to America doing our own stuff—”

“With you finally meeting your pen pal.”

“Yes. Alright. I’ll go and meet my pen pal. And during the break, no thinking about anything miraculous related. If ever there’s an akuma, only those who’ll be needed will go. Max will bring us to the akuma’s location and if there is anything going on that we can’t be excused of or if the fight goes longer than expected, Alix will bring us back in time making it look like we just went to the toilets, the usuals. Any questions?”

“““Non.”””

“Good. Operation: Taking a Break is good to go.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Yay! Finally got to post it. So comments? What do you guys think and who do you think who is saying what? I know there will be new holders in S4, but I decided I’ll either make them a temp or they still don’t know the other’s identities bc of stuff, so yeah. Still thinking abt it. Adios (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31840603

[storydays]

Season 1, ep 7, p2

(3rd POV)

You hummed softly, walking down the hallway with some fire flakes in your hand, and paused seeing Korra spying through a keyhole. You went to grab her shoulder when she stood up straight with a horrified look on her face. "Kor--" she ran down the stairs before you could finish your sentence.

You followed her, slower, and listened to her babble an excuse. "I forgot it's my turn to airsit the babybenders..I-I mean babysit the airbender kids. See you later!" They turned to you with confused looks and you shrugged, swallowing more fire flakes. "It's one of Aunt Pema's daily baby checks." Nevermore squealed in delight as she ate majority of your fire flakes.

"Hey!" You splashed her with water, making the little hothead sizzle. Everyone laughed at the two of you, the old butler even concealing a chuckled behind his hand. "She's been getting so fiesty lately and I don't appreciate the rebelliousness, young lady." You complained and then chided the dragon.

"You know, I read something in a book that says animals tend to imitate their loved ones behavior." Asami teased, making you playfully roll your eyes. "I've been hearing that a lot," you sigh, making your bangs puff in the air slightly. Nevermore curled on your shoulder, chirping happily. "Come on, let's go find my secret stash of fire snacks." You grinned, as Mako and Asami laughed before following you to get some snacks.

*Timeskip*

You blinked, as your Aunt, Uncle and friend storm up to the Sato mansion. "What's going on?" Mako demanded, pushing Korra's shoulder, wincing when you gripped his arm. "Why are they asking more Hiroshi more questions?" "I overheard him on the phone yesterday. Asami, I don't know how to tell you this, but I think your father might be involved with the equalists." "What?! I don't believe this!" She stormed towards her father's office. You followed her, trying to calm her down.

"A-Asami, maybe this is just a misunderstanding." She turned her green gaze to you, "Don't talk to me, (Y/N)! You were in on this, and you didn't think to tell me?!" Your (e/c) eyes burned sadness into Asami's, as she stalked off. You sigh, running a hand through your hair before trailing sadly behind her, before walking into the office, standing in the corner. You studied everyone from the corner of the room, and you were biting the inside of your lip before closing your eyes, listening to everyone's breathing, and focusing on what Toph taught you.

"My father is innocent. Just because we're not benders, doesn't mean we support those awful Equalists." She went to stand next to Hiroshi. "Is that this is about?" He demanded. "I can assure you, I have nothing  to do with those radicals." Mako butted in, "Yeah, you don't know your're talking about Korra." Mako accused. "I overheard you on the phone. You said that Cabbage Corp investigation bought you time, and your getting ready to strike. Explain that." Korra placed her hand on her hips, staring into the man's eyes.

He chuckled, before looking into the Avatar's eyes. "This is all a misunderstanding,resulting from the Avatar's over-active imagination. My number one competitor was knocked out of the game. It's providing me with an opportunity to strike the market with a new line of Sato-mobiles. It's just business--"

You studied everyone from the corner of the room, and you were biting the inside of your lip before closing your eyes, listening to everyone's breathing, narrowing on Hiroshi's breath hitch. Your (e/c) eyes flew open as you declared loud and cleared, "Liar." All eyes turned to you as you approached the now sweating man. Asami looked at you with hurt and betrayal in her face.

"(Y/N), how could you? You've known my father for a long time, and you know he's not apart of th-" "And you know me, Asami. I was listening to everyone's breathing, and Hiroshi's hitched when he spoke just now." "That doesn't mean anything!" (E/C) eyes stared into angry green, as everyone watched you silently. "I was trained by the Greatest Earthbender of all time, I'm a spiritual master, and a waterbender master, if anyone knows about lying signs, it would be me. I'm sorry that your sweet fantasy is being destroyed, but---"

SMACK!

A sharp sting burned on your cheek. You met her emerald eyes, and with a bright red handmark on your cheek, you turned your eyes to your Aunt.  "I know your troops are outside and waiting, but you should use your seismic sense and you'll find something in the workshop behind the house. Clearly, I'm not wanted here, so I'll be anywhere else." You avoided Asami's gaze and stalked out, and hopped onto your polar bear dog. You clicked your tongue and soon you and Neo took off. Your (e/c) eyes watered, from both the wind and from the pain you felt in your heart. You willed them away, and the next thing you knew, you were by a secluded part of the park, no one around. You hopped off Neo, and knelt by a nearby pond, placing your hands in the water, before soothing your stinging cheek, wincing at the faint scratch marks from Asami's nails.

'You know, Cub,' you didn't jump when Neo laid next to you, watching you carefully, 'It's okay to cry when your heart aches.' You shook your head, settling into a lotus position against him. "No, I promised someone special to me that I won't ever cry. That I'll be strong." He rumbled against your back, with a disapproving growl. 'I sincerely doubt that's what she meant.'

You huffed, your bangs puffing slightly. "Hush, 'm tryna meditate." The animal growled again before leaving you to find peace.

*Later that night*

You jumped up using a water shield to block an incoming attack. "You've got to be quicker than that, Auntie." Your eyes softened as your Aunt jumped down from a tree. "I thought I'd find you here." Lin said, gruffly before coming over and sitting next to you. She held out a bag of food, and Neo perked up sniffing in the bag for something.

Lin chuckled amused, before reaching in and handing Neo his treat before turning to you with a concerned frown. "Eat, (Y/N), I know you haven't eaten since breakfast this morning." At that moment, your stomach growled, just as the scent of Lin's meat and vegetable wrap hit your stomach.

Not many people knew, but the latest Chief of Police was an excellent cook.Whenever you were in need of some tough love, you went to Lin and that's exactly what her food was. She chuckled as you devoured the wrap. "Hungry, mali heroj (little hero)?" You hummed in affirmation as you swallowed. "For your food? Always." She watched you with gentle eyes. "I'm worried about you, (Y/N). Everyone is, you haven't been yourself in a long time." You put your wrap down and stared at the twinkling stars, thinking about your vision during this last meditation.

"I'll be fine, Aunt Lin. I'm just..." "You are not alone! You have people who love you,and want to help you, but we can't if you continue to block us out." You turned to her, before she held her arms out. You fell into her warm embrace but said loud and clear: "Maybe it's safer for everyone to stay out. Maybe...I don't want anyone to be burdened with my problems. Not even Gran-Gran has any advice for what's going on. No one can." You gripped her waist, and stiffled your sobs against her heart.

Now, not many people could break her walls, but from the moment she met you, you wormed your way into her stone cold heart, and she loved you like a son, and hated seeing you in pain. This was part of the reason she hated the world, when you were a child you were so open and full of love for the world, but then reality hit you way too hard, way too early. You learned to be strong at a young age, and survived things no grown adult could handle.

You were breaking, and you were breaking fast, and she knew what she had to do when she got you home safe in your own bed.

Even though you're 19, you are still a child, and like all children...

you still need your father.

[fa-by]

Hi babies and dear Anons 👋🏼🤗 Back with a new 'Q&A' post. Enjoy 🙃

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 and yes, I did. You can find it here, dear: https://fa-by.tumblr.com/post/648192029691691008/camren-timeline-tittle-edited.

Yes, I heard about that rumor, dear Anon, and veeery false.

I knoooow 😍😍😍 Let's cry in joy and queerness 🥺😭🌈🏳‍🌈

Yep, dear Anon. And unfortunately for us, they will continue to do so for a veeeery long time 😒🙄😔

No, dear Anon, I highly doubt it's another duet. They'd be really, but really stupid if they do 🤦🏻‍♀‍

No, dear Anon, these are just people who want attention. People who have problems in their lives and talk shit about others to feel better. This is just the work of those people who believe in black magic and want to involve as many people as possible to think like them, and if they fail, they attack you because you didn't agree with them and you didn't go to their side. They can get so desperate they even get to the point of, oh I don't know, since you've blocked them, sending an anonymous ask to your girlfriend with a death wish for you:

The funny thing for me besides thinking that maybe this person believes they're a witch and imagining them with a voodoo doll with a needle in my stomach, is that I was kind to them the first time 🤷🏻‍♀‍ I tried to make them reason, I really tried to meet them halfway, but sometimes that's not enough with people like that.

But anyway. My point is that no, management has nothing to do with it. Thank you for your ask, dear 🤗

It's okay, dear Anon, don't worry 😄 In last time’s ask you wanted my opinion on the song, right? Well, Not Killin' It Today simply talks about how not every day is a good day. It can happen to all of us not to feel 100%, and Mila says just that. For us girls it can happen even more during or just before the red sea period, if you know what I mean, and indeed, she herself sings “I'm PMSing” = PMS: premenstrual syndrome. If that's why, I think she wrote this song precisely around that period 🤣

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Don't worry, dear, I can understand you, and if I hadn't, we would have found a way to do it. English is not my first language either.

1) Yes, I do think that.

2) (I knew all this) I know she did; she's been doing it for years if that's why because Taylor is one of Camila's mentors. Taylor is what can be defined as the celebrity master with PRs. She’s always done what she was asked to do and she’s always fulfilled her PRs duties of her contracts, and indeed, look where she is now, as well as being a great songwriter. So yeah, who better than her?

Hope you're great too, dear 🤗

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 I'm sorry I'm bad with general questions like this 😅 I'm so much better when I'm asked a more specific question, and usually, when I have something in mind, I write it and create a post with my opinion about it. I'm not kidding about how bad I am at this, believe me. It’s the same thing as when I get the typical “tell me something about yourself” phrase. It's like my brain suddenly switches off 😅🤣 Can you take a look at all my posts from my archive to see which ones I’ve already responded to and maybe come back with a question? I'm really sorry, dear 😖🥺

I'm sorry but Camila can't stop anything, dear Anon. Not Camila, not Roger, and not even Shoo. I understand your frustration, believe me, I do, but you, and anyone else to which this is still not clear, need to understand that it's a contract. A contract called a relationship contract, and it's a legally binding document. I know it's hard, but the advice I can give you is to ignore the 12-year-old SS and their fantasies, and wait for it to finish without wasting your energy on the bullshit they say. Don't let them get to you and unleash your anger. You make them win this way. Rather, have a laugh at their ignorance.

Hey dear Anon, I'm good, thanks, and I hope you're doing well too 😊 They broke up for a little while, for about a month before, so more than a breakup I would call it a little break. And to answer the rest of your questions, dear, I'll sum it all up by telling you that when they're not together, or they're on a break, they have a different way of acting than when they're together. And I speak in general. It shows in the way they behave in general. Now it's much harder to see since they're no longer in the group and you could clearly see when it happened, and it’s also hard since the pandemic, but there are patterns. I’ve spent so much time analyzing them that they're quite predictable in my eyes 🤣 Forgive me if I'm not going into details, but these are personal observations that not everyone can agree on, you know? Maybe I'll do it in the future, who knows 🤷🏻‍♀‍ We'll see 😉 Have a good day/night too 😄

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼 and thank you very much 😄 and yes, of course. To answer the rest of your questions, I'll summarize everything by telling you that you have to take into account that I entered the fandom at the Work from Home's time, so they were all just rumors to me initially. Camren themselves were just a rumor to me. I had to search, analyze, and find the proofs on my own to prove to myself which ones were true or not. The first example that comes to mind and that I can give you is the kiss in the van in London that I recently explained in my ‘Inauguration’ post.

I'm sorry you think this way, dear Anon. I honestly think she doesn't even know. She has said many times that she tries to stay away from social media, and I really believe that. She did it before already, but I'm convinced that she does that even more since she was going through that bad time and she was about to give it all up. Besides, it's known that she doesn't manage her accounts, just as it's known that she doesn't even control how they’re used I would say 90% of the time. I don't know if she'll find out and eventually will say something about it. We don't even know if she has the freedom to do so. So, I'm really sorry you're making a decision based on something she didn't do.

Hey to you too, dear Anon 😄 Yeah, it's nothing new. I'd already debunked the whole Laucy story with my very first post (https://fa-by.tumblr.com/post/648191757219250176/there-is-a-light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel), so as far as I'm concerned, she can say what she wants in future podcasts/interviews as well, but she'll never be able to convince me that she's not actually talking about Camila. This was simply a much more chill, fun, with no tears, and no mention of Camila repetition. The first podcast served to plant the seed. We know that Lucy is her main narrative and we know that she will continue to use her for a very long time. I mean, it’s convenient for her. It's the perfect cover for our Mila. But if people want to keep believing they (Laucy) were real, that's honestly their problem 🤣 Let them be convinced of their beliefs, dear, and have a laugh 😉

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Here's the thing……… Yes, to everything you said 🤣 but let me explain why.

1&2) Yes, Laur is like ‘part’ of their contract but for simple narrative, as you yourself said too. If that's why, so are 5H and all the rest of the people who are or have been involved with them. I'll give you an example. You know the bullshit they said about the Austin Mahone tour? That Sunsilk was always isolated in his bus playing guitar? That no one spoke to him outside of Camila when there are actually plenty of videos showing him spending time with the rest of 5H and the other people on the tour too? Certainly none of those people can call him out on that bullshit today and say it wasn't true. They'd blow his cover. They'd make him not credible in the general public's eyes. So everyone needs to be quiet for what they know (that's how it works in that world for every damn thing), and that's Lauren's involvement in their PR. Be quiet. Be quiet and go along with the game. Just as Camila had to during hers with Tymbal.

3) They have to, dear, or all the farces told so far would go to shit for the GP too. 4) 100%, dear Anon, 100% 😏😉 but it must also be said that they'll remain connected forever anyway because of the group.

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Welcome and thank you very much 🤗

1) Everything she's been doing lately leads us to think that the first single for the EP will arrive shortly. I think and hope it will arrive for the summer, but as far as the actual EP is concerned, it will depend on the release of the single. So if the single is out this summer, it's very likely that the EP will follow its course by arriving towards the beginning of autumn. We'll see, dear, we'll see 🤞🏼 🤞🏼 🤞🏼

2) I know that many people get upset and that they're disappointed, and while I too would like her to interact with us more, I also know and understand that it's not just up to her. Although she's much but much freer than before, she still has contracts, people, and patterns to follow.

Take it from someone who's waiting for Rihanna's new album for 5 years 😅🤣 It takes patience, and I have a lot of patience, dear. I fall into the category of those who don't mind waiting simply because I'll always support Lauren.

People forget this: we have to consider ourselves lucky that after what she went through, she decided to pursue with music.

If you love her, if you stan her, then be patient. Stay metaphorically speaking by her side no matter what. That’s what I think, dear Anon.

Do you mean the first breakup they had that lasted from late November 2014 to late December/very first days of January 2015, or do you mean the bad one that took place in October 2015? But in any case, both of your questions rejoin only one event, dear Anon: the real breakup of the group that happened in mid-October 2015. But answering you more specifically:

1) You can see with your own eyes the videos of the interviews of that period by starting with this one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WqOb9qBQ_M&t=11s.

2) Camila’s unofficial departure from the group at the time was the icing on the cake, but you have to consider a lot of things, dear. The fact that they were young. The fact that they were in the spotlight and were being monitored by both fans and management. The fact that they had those same people controlling them and telling them what to do all the time. The fact that they were constantly under pressure. The fact that they couldn't be together freely as a couple. The fact that they were forced to pretend they didn't love each other. The fact that they were forced to do PRs, despite being much lighter than now. I could go on with the list, dear Anon, but I think you get the point. It's a lot of stress and a lot to digest, especially considering how young they were and the environment around them.

Have a nice day too, dear 😄

Of course I can answer you, dear Anon 😊 So, in my opinion, and always keep in mind that I could be wrong, she told every person in her clique at different times. I think Mila knew about her attraction to girls back in school, but she didn't say anything to anyone because she didn't have a reason to. In the sense that she hasn't had the opportunity to approach another girl and therefore have a reason to tell someone about her queerness. After her first kiss with Lauren on New Year's Eve, I'm willing to bet that the first person she came out to was her mom. Camila's number one best friend is and always has been Sinu, so I can feel it in my bones that she was the first one to know. Oh and, we're in early 2013 here, so Mila was still 15.

After Sinu, there were the girls (DNA) who obviously lived their story with them step by step and therefore I don't think it was a real coming out with them, and her best friends back at home, Sandra and Marielle Guzman (and maybe also Mariana Luna since she was the other one with whom she was very close immediately after the two sisters, but I'm not very convinced of it), and Jenny Runza, who despite being a little younger than Sinu, Mila has always regarded as one of her best friends.

In 2014, when Camren were official, there were more confirmations that led to her automatic coming out with the rest of her clique's friends since the word Camren had already spread around like wildfire for almost two years by then.

At the beginning of 2015, it was the moment when Laur came out to her family, so I strongly believe that that was also Alejandro's moment, although I'm convinced that like the Jaureguis, Ale knew about his daughter all along and that he was even more convinced at X-Factor. Sofi was last on the list simply for a matter of age and I'm talking about 2017. I can't tell you when she told her grandpas. I don't even know if she could have told Norberto because I don't know the kind of relationship she has with him, but Mercedes? Well, abuelita certainly knew this before 2018 because I laugh when I think about the way she looked and talked with Mattress during their PR.

It's not that simple, dear Anon. You're not considering the fact that they didn't communicate during that time. You're dwelling on only one thing and are not looking at the big picture of their relationship at the time. Okay. Let's do something. Picture a scenario that has nothing to do with Camren.

Picture a couple living together. A couple who often quarrel over even the most trivial things or who don't talk at all because they almost avoid each other. Their relationship is very unstable and they're basically at the end of it. Now picture a conversation between this couple in which the only exchanges spoken in a normal way are by then just daily information such as: “I'll be at work from 8 to 4” - “Okay. Will you come home right after?” - “Yeah, I think so” - and then that person comes home at 6 pm despite the worried calls and messages received.

They're so distant that the person who came home late didn't feel compelled to pick up the phone and tell them about the delay. Probably that person didn't even feel compelled to give an explanation and justify the delay once they got home because they're convinced that their partner doesn't really care and that they're just looking for yet another excuse to argue. That person will have felt even more trapped and suffocated by their partner who was really worried instead, but neither of them tells the other the truth because they're too busy arguing and blaming each other instead of meeting each other halfway and really talking about what they feel and makes them vulnerable. They will surely end up in bed with their backs to each other without saying a word to each other after the fight.

Now look at these phrases from the song itself and put Camren's faces in place of the couple in the example: “With no confrontation, I really wish we could talk about it instead” – “All I need from your side is for you to communicate”. Is it easier for you to understand the dynamic now, dear?

Hello to you too @camilalauren0327 👋🏼😄 [why can't I ever tag you in posts?]

No, no, no, dear. None of this happens. So. I'd like to start by saying that OCD begins when people misunderstand their own thoughts. We've all had unwelcome and intrusive thoughts at least once in our lives, right? Well, the importance of those thoughts becomes much more intense or sometimes even extreme for people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Like, I'll give you a stupid example, okay?

Most of the time I park, I lock the car, and after I’ve taken a couple of steps, I ask myself: “Ma ho chiuso la macchina?” / “Did I lock the car?”. So, I turn around and lock it again with the keys' remote control even though I've already done it, but I do that anyway to be sure and because maybe I really didn't do it because it happened for real. Now. What would a person with OCD do? Most likely they would do like me, and after getting halfway, they would go back again to close it AGAIN. They would do it a couple of times, and most likely, they would do it a third time after they got home. They would leave the house to go lock the car they've already locked five times.

OCD can begin in adolescence, early adulthood, or even childhood. The onset of obsessive-compulsive disorder is typically gradual, but in some cases, it can begin suddenly. Symptoms vary in severity from time to time and this variation may be related to the occurrence of stressful events. Now. Doesn't all this rings a bell for you? No? Okay, let me explain. I'll copy a piece of my ‘Camren Timeline (Tittle edited)’ post for you: “Camila suffers from one of the variants of OCD since she was 8, and despite seeing a therapist since 2013, her OCD was diagnosed at the end of 2015. C also suffers from anxiety, panic attacks, mood disorders, and depression (all linked to her OCD).”

Why did she start suffering from it at the age of 8? Because little Mila moved back and forth between Havana and Mexico City until she was 5, almost 6, right? After that, she moved to Miami with her mom by leaving behind her family, her friends, basically everything she knew, and her dad. Her dad finally managed to rejoin them almost two years later when she was almost 8 years old. Although she had her family with her again, her little mind didn't relax. It didn’t bring peace to her. In fact, that sprang her first OCD symptoms, which gradually worsened and then fully erupted years later in the group.

What triggers OCD? Stressful life events.

Got it now? Were you able to put the pieces together, dear? I've also answered other questions on the same topic here if it may interest you: https://fa-by.tumblr.com/post/648194918161989633/%C9%9F.

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Don't worry, nobody’s asked me to do it yet.

So, as I think we all know, The Boy was originally titled Care About Me. Ed Sheeran wrote it and gave it to Mila for her self-titled album Camila. Mila almost completely rewrote it (Ed said 90% of it) and lastly discarded it because it didn't fit well with the rest of the songs on the album, and I totally understand that.

Intro:

“Yeah, he's messed up a couple times

But he's my glass of cherry wine

And I drink and I drink 'til I'm drunk off of him

I'm in love

(Ash:) He just hit me up to come over

He said what?”

So. The song begins with Mila trying to justify the boy by saying that even though he made mistakes, she's so into him to get past it. I know she used terms like drunk off of him and in love, but she doesn't mean that she's actually in love with him in this case. Just very into him. She's jokingly explaining the situation because she's talking to Ashlee, her friend, and I don't know about you, but my friends and I often use the term in love to make people laugh and to indicate interest in someone.

Like if we see someone for the first time and they're really hot, or if one of the celebrities we like posts like a selfie, we say “I'm in love”. Or, like, another kind of example: one of my best friends has been dating this guy for a few months, and last week he surprised her with some flowers (which he paid very much by the way) and with dinner just because. Hearing her happiness since she has always had only assholes so far, when she finished telling me everything, I made fun of her by laughing and saying: “Lost in love, huh?”. Not because she's actually in love with him, but because it was such a nice thing and she's into him.

So Mila used those phrases to indicate how much she liked him and not because she was actually in love. Also because if she had really been in love with him, she wouldn't have said she didn't care about him for the rest of the song.

Then ‘Ash’ receives the text, and this leads us to understand that the boy is a player and a cheater.

Verse 1:

“Momma said, ‘Always be kind, girl’ (Girl, what's on your mind?)

But I got something I should say (Say it, girl), uh

Boy, I'm sick and done and tired (There's something on my mind)

I'm not yours to manipulate, uh-huh (Tell him girl, tell hi)”

It explains itself quite well. She can't take it anymore.

Pre-Chorus:

“Oh boy, hold your tongue, I don't want no 'pology

‘Cause we both know you're thinking wit' was under your jeans”

Mila tells him not to waste his breath on justifications derived from his member because she doesn't need them. Tsk, Tsk. Typical male behavior. 80% of their thoughts are formulated based on how and where to put their tool in 🙄

“Sent your friends over to tell them you're missing me”

He even sends his friends to her to try to change her mind, but:

“But I don't care, so tell that boy that I am fine”

But she doesn't care. She doesn't care because she's fine this way. In fact, she's better off without him.

Chorus:

“I don't care about the day he decided to leave

I won't be there when he tells another lie so”

This makes us understand how many times she's had to forgive his bullshit.

“I'm gon' use all of my words for weapons”

We know how lethal words can be.

“'Cause the boy don't care about me, lemme say it again, now, babe

I don't care about the way he thinks it's so sweet (Ah)

All that sugar cone gon' be bad for me tomorrow (Ah)”

He can try to kiss her ass as much as he wants, but she won't change her mind. Talking sweet to try to win her back doesn't work because she doesn't want to deal with a player who lies to her and messes up every time.

“I'm gon' use all of my words for weapons

'Cause the boy don't care about me”

He doesn't really care about her, so it's even useless to her that he tries to fix it.

Verse 2:

“All my girls inside the place now (Say we don't need no man)

No wonder we switch sides sometimes (We got this)”

Camilita, Camilita, Camilita 😏 No wonder many girls prefer other girls, huh?

Switching sides can mean switching sides in the true sense of the word, that is for example going from one side of a room to the other. It can mean changing your mind about something or someone. And, most interesting of all in this case, it can mean switching sides in sexual orientation.

I've said many times that she's a fucking genius, and we know how sneaky she is with her songs. She was really smart at using this hidden meaning because a lot of people took it for granted that she meant the meaning of changing her mind since we girls have this nomination about often changing our minds about something.

“Wipe that good look off your face (Say we got better plans)

Ooh, you better not act surprised (For real)”

Exactly. What would be the point? A lot of guys do that 🙄

Bridge:

“Oh, oh, don't care about me

That's fine with me, babe

You don't care about me

And that's fine with me

Fine with me, fine with me (Don't care about)

It is what I need, oh (That's fine with)

Don't care about, care about

Care about, care about me, oh”

She's fine with it simply because she doesn't care about him either.

Outro:

(Ash:) “Girl, that's old, we're done with that”

Yep. She's definitely done with that/him.

And this is my interpretation, dear Anon 😄 In my opinion, if this song really ended up on the self-titled, it would've been used to give yet another proof of her light, old PR with Michael. People were supposed to remember her last, sure, Jan, flame before meeting the love guru Matrix. It was supposed to be like: “Hey, hey, guys, I'm straight, look! I was with a boy and now with another grandpa one!”.

It's just a different version of the Cinderella song for me: she doesn't need a guy in her life. Don't wrap your head around it too much, dear Anon. There's no deep meaning behind it at all. After all, this song was given to her by her idol, and she certainly couldn't refuse. She changed it in a sassy and fun way, she saw that she couldn't fit it with the others because it wouldn't have made sense, and she then discarded it. The end. She was like: it was funny, but I actually have a story to tell. Bye-bye.

Have a good day too, dear ❤️

Hello to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 and yes of course I can do both, but for what purpose am I supposed to do All Again? I mean, I can give you my interpretation of that song without any problem, but it wasn't written by them. By none of them five. That's why I'm asking you for what purpose am I supposed to do that. And that should answer your second question as well. Like No Way and many other songs, the girls may have related to them, but they didn't write them. The only songs they wrote, and not alone but with other songwriters, are:

- Me & My Girls, Don't Wanna Dance Alone, and Who Are You for Better Together,

- All in My Head (Flex) for 7/27,

- and for the self-titled album we have Sauced Up: Arlen (+ other songwriters), Make You Mad: Normally (+ other songwriters), Lonely Night: Norminah (+ other songwriters), Messy: Normally (+ other songwriters), and Bridget: Alren (+ other songwriters).

It's like you ask me to give you my interpretation on for example Who Are You. I could do it without a problem, but that song was written by 8 different heads. With the exception of the bridge that we know Lauren wrote, I can't tell you who among Camila, Dinah, Normani, Ally, Julian Bunetta, PJ Bianco, and Nasri Atweh wrote which part. Analyzing a song sung by a single artist/songwriter is completely different because the idea and concept and feelings are based on a single person. The songwriters who co-write the song together with the artist adapt to them, or maybe the idea comes to one of them, but they modify the concept together with the artist based on their personal experience, as happened for example with Consequences.

Now that you know all this, do you still want me to analyze All Again? Let me know 😄

Let's move on to More Than That.

Lauren wrote four songs in 2016, two of them were meant to be for someone else, but one of them, as we all know well, she kept it to herself. She decided to keep More Than That to herself once she modified the original lyrics along with Prince Charlez and SoundzFire, aka Hue Wayne Strother.

Intro:

“M-M-M-Murda”

This small part of the initial effect intro we hear, is simply a shoutout to Murda Beatz, one of the two producers of the song.

Verse 1:

“I see you watching so I walked into your stare

'Cause I ain't in the position to be walking over there”

She's not in the position to go there simply because she's taken, but she likes to be watched. She likes the attention she's receiving, so she puts herself in plain sight so that this person can keep looking at her.

“I got a situation, I can tell you wanna know”

This guy must have wondered: ‘Why if she's looking back at me, then she won't approach me? Is she someone who likes playing hard to get? Is she a teasing sort? Is she waiting for me to go to her? Or maybe she's in a relationship?’ Typical questions you ask yourself in that situation, and Laur summarized them all in one simple sentence.

“How you can take an honest girl and turn her to a …

If I'ma take a gamble, then you better come correct

I need more than them diamonds that you got around your neck

Shit, anybody can flex, my baby do it best

If you come with somethin' better, then we might just take it there”

The stare, the fact that this guy has the money (diamond necklace), the physical appearance, are not enough for her to push her to cheat. Because if she has to take the risk of cheating, these are certainly not the things that would drive her to do it, but she could if he had something better to offer her. [And with that, please keep in mind that Lauren is a very loyal person and that she wouldn't have done it even if this guy had gone with something better]

Pre-Chrous:

“I know I ain't right for tempting you

But I just wanna see what you would do

If I gave you a taste of what I do

Just remember that I don't belong to you”

The fact that she returned his gaze, that she spoke to him and gave him just a little taste, doesn't mean that she’s no longer taken. As I said before, she likes the attention, and although she knows that it's wrong to instigate him, she does it anyway because she's playing with him. “It's kind of more like clowning him” as she said herself.

Chrous:

“You gon' have to come stronger than this liquor

Wanna take me home, better be more convincing

It'll take more than that to get to me

More than that to get your way

Boy, you better come stronger than this liquor

Wanna take me home, better be more convincing

It'll take more than that to get to me

More than that to get your way

I'm stronger than this liquor”

During the approach in which the guy tried to ‘take her home’ for the night, Lauren easily manages to reject him despite being drunk, because her loyalty is stronger than the attraction she may have felt for him and certainly stronger than what she was drinking.

Verse 2:

“If my man notice, there’ll be some issues”

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I'm sorry but every time I listen to this part I can literally picture Camila turning into the Incredible Hulk as we've seen many times. And shit, despite her being tiny, Mila can be scary when she's pissed off.

“But take my number down, I just might hit you

No, I'm just playing, I'm so deep in love

But the way you talkin' might just have me actin' up”

Drunken thoughts mixed with attraction/arousal blocked by common sense and loyalty.

“The way you looking at me, boy, I know what's up

I can feel how you feel without even a touch”

Let's not fool ourselves, guys. You too will have felt when a person is ready to jump your bones. To feel it in the air. To perceive it from the way they look at you, talk to you, and yes, even using excuses to innocently touch for example your arm even if the intentions are far from innocent. These kinds of things, whether you're in a relationship or not, whether you're loyal or not, and especially if you're attracted to the person in question, make you feel appreciated. They make you feel good. But:

“But don't think that's gon' make me give it up

Boy, your time is up”

But that doesn't mean, however, that you take action on it. It doesn't mean you give in to temptation. It was nice, but no thanks. Bye-bye.

Outro:

“It'll take more”

It takes more than good looks, money, and fake, shiny people from L.A.

And that's it, dear Anon 🙃 This is just a funny song about a situation that happened in a club, in which Lauren shows her flirtatious side but also her loyal side. It wasn't that good for her image, but I have an explanation for that as well.

Remember how I initially said that Lauren wrote this song to give it to someone else and then decided to keep it for herself after modifying the original lyrics? Well, in my opinion, she ‘decided to keep it’ and was even chosen as a single, simply for the narrative. It was chosen to go along with the fake love square cheating bullshit [Lauren and Ty who cheated on Lucy and Alycia to be together]. People should have believed even more that Lauren was a person capable of cheating, and this song served the purpose.

🤸🏻‍♀‍🤸🏻‍♀‍🤸🏻‍♀‍

Aaand I'm done 😜 I hope I was helpful in this case too 😄 Thank you all for your asks and as usual, know that I'm available for those who have questions, so feel free to ask 😊

Always remember to be kind, to others and to yourselves. Be a good example. Be patient. Be safe and take care of yourselves. Don't let our ship sink. Keep shipping them, but please respectfully 🙏🏼 Sending you virtual love and hugs 🤗🤗🤗 I love you, babies. Always with love, F ❤️

[mego42]

Hey! I know the survey is coming, but I’m still so confused about the order of the scenes for the car/bank bit. Since you think the “choice” one happened before they go in (right? I don’t remember which one you thought it was) either way, do you mind laying out how *you* think the order of events were?

AH YOU MEAN THE EMPIRICALLY CORRECT ORDER (hahahahaha no i’m jk, @foxmagpie​’s argument is extremely compelling)

that said, here’s the order i think it happened in:

1. the first car scene, beth going to get out of the car and rio asking if she’s really going to do this. 

2. the final car scene where beth tells him she feels like she has no choice and he tells her now she does

3. they go into the bank

4. they get pulled over

(if you’re new to the debate, @foxmagpie​’s order is 1, 3, 4, 2 which i can see mostly bc rio is a dramatique heaux who makes stupid ass choices around beth for the theatrics of it all)

rambling support for my reasoning under the cut.

i think it’s the above, though, for a couple of reasons:

1) i def think he calls her out pre-bank. first off, why else is beth taking off her seatbelt? they’re about to go in and do the thing. 

he’s known what’s up the whole ep (he literally handed her the pelican brief, one of the books the wire was behind, in the opening scene) and has been more or less sitting back with popcorn watching to see how far she’s really gonna go with it. he’s also been like, p blatantly telegraphing that to her too and getting increasingly more annoyed and incredulous the further she takes it. he doesn't need her to prove she’s committed to this charade bc she has time and time again throughout the ep and i think he’s p pissed off (and hurt, tbh) over it and he snaps.

2) once snapped, i personally think it would be especially stupid to go into the bank with her knowing she knows he knows (this is so deliciously convoluted) without some kind of indication she’s not going to quadruple cross someone (if the double-cross is betraying him, the triple cross is betraying the secret service, so betraying him again would be quadruple right? whatever this math checks out)

but again, to megan’s point, rio loves his theatrics. i wouldn’t disbelieve him being like GOT YOU, then making her go in while she’s losing her whole ass entire mind like WHAT DOES THAT MEAN THOUGH and not letting her off the hook until after.

3) but also the music. like. the music. 

4) rio looks so SMUG in the bank which, to megan’s point, could 1000000% believably be the fun of playing the secret service but i think there’s too much on the line with him and beth for him to be that complacent with it up in the air

5) beth’s whole MO in the bank, v subdued, v follow his lead. i’m sorry does that sound like a panicked and scrambling beth to you? that sounds like a beth who’s been (temporarily) defeated and is licking her wounds before figuring out her next move (bc like, for as much as i love her choosing him, that was obvs the only choice actually on the table when he’s LITERALLY IN THE CAR WITH HER and while i do think she actually is slow-mo choosing rio across a multi-ep arc that is almost certainly going to not last and end poorly, i don’t think it’s going to be straightforward and that quadruple cross is def coming up soon)

6) as for why beth looks so sketch in the pull over scene, while i do think rio made her pick pre-bank, i don’t think he told her what the whole scheme was. i don’t think. she had any clue what was in that bag and i lowkey think a part of her was p convinced the gun with her prints was in it and there was a good chance she was about to get arrested. (but the fingerprint! counterpoint: if you were beth and you’d seen rio wiggle out of everything he has, would you be 100% sure he wouldn’t say fuck it and try to wiggle out of that too?)

7) no but like seriously the music

8) also the matchy matchy crime marrieds shot that i’m apparently going to work into every post from here to eternity 

it’s called visual storytelling okay. it means stuff. obvs open to interpretation stuff or i wouldn’t be sitting here arguing for my interpretation against megan’s but it’s still a puzzle piece.

8) ummmmmmmmmmmm i think that’s all i’ve got. there might’ve been another thing but i’ve forgotten it

9) OH WAIT NO I REMEMBER the show. has an established history of chopping scenes up, pulling out key pieces of them and then circling back after the fact to recontextualize everything that’s happened since (201, 204, 213, etc etc or maybe that’s it? that’s all my brain’s coughing up rn) so it would not be out of character to save the end of the first scene for the end of the show to bookend everything that’s happened in between

10) okay that’s all for real kthxbye

[chalkrevelations]

Moving on to Episode 4 of Word of Honor, and y’all.

Wait, first: If you’re new or just visiting, this is a re-watch, so there are SPOILERS not just for this ep but for the ENTIRE SHOW. Maybe a lot of them. Scroll away and come back later if you haven’t seen all 36.5 eps and want to watch it unspoiled. (They’re all gonna be tagged “word of honor episode reax”)

A couple of big things, first:

So, right up front, I don’t know for sure that this is the first time we’ve heard the word, but it’s the first time I’ve twigged to it in this re-watch. As Zhou Zishu and Chengling are leaving the inn in the morning, at the very beginning of the ep, Wen Kexing asks why ZZS continues to call him gongzi and wants to know if he’s still too much of an outsider for a less formal form of address. He uses the word 外人 (wairen) (at 2:30) for “outsider,” which is how the subs translate it here. Anybody who’s been around for these flailing reactions since the first time I watched the show might remember that I made a deal about this somewhere around in the late 20s of the episodes, based on a post from someone that I scrolled quickly past while avoiding spoilers and that I have NEVER FOUND AGAIN and am STILL LOOKING FOR, that alerted me to the use of this word and its nuances in ep 25. There’s a conversation there about WKX possibly taking over some of Chengling’s training at Siji Manor, and WKX demurs, calling himself “外人.” Youku translated it there as “someone else,” as in having “someone else” train your disciple, and ZZS responds with “And you’re 外人?” again translated as “someone else.” This actually seems to mean “stranger,” or “outsider,” as they do actually translate it here in Ep 4 - presumably someone who’s from outside your sect, at least in the Ep 25 instance, in which WKX is labeling himself that while he’s in the midst of his upcoming crisis, trying to keep his emotional distance from ZZS and Siji Manor. It’s used again in Ep 26, when ZZS finds WKX giving training advice to Chengling, and it’s one of the ways they have WKX and A-Xiang reflect each other, when she uses it in Ep 29, and rejects it as a description of herself, in order to claim a place in Cao Weining’s sect/family (which, now, knowing … GOD. My HEART). Anyway, I found it super-interesting that WKX is using this word here in Ep 4 to push against ZZS’s boundaries, in contrast to the way he’ll use it later, to try to fortify his own walls against ZZS and Siji Manor. I begin to suspect that he doesn’t want to tell ZZS who he actually is because, maybe, just a little bit, he wants ZZS to figure it out, to recognize him, to truly know him (zhiji) without him having to spell it out. We kind of travel back around to this idea near the end of the ep, when WKX is questioning ZZS about the Baiyi sword, and ZZS tells him that their relationship is like the fish that ZZS unsuccessfully tried to cook and threw on the ground – raw (i.e., unacquainted) – to explain why he keeps shutting out and shutting down WKX. Only we know now that isn’t entirely true, and WKX certainly suspects it isn’t entirely true. (Also, just an observation, ZZS says in that later scene that he’s not interested in who WKX is. DON’T TELL HIM THAT, my dude, now it’s going to be 3,246 episodes before he’ll give you any personal info.)

Also, just a note – I think we make the switch from Zhou-xiong to A-Xu in this ep. (ETA: No! I have been reliably informed by @janedrewfinally that this switch happened back at the end of Ep 3 (at 41:18), and it seems to be part of what precipitates the Completely Reasonable, Not At All Flirtatious, Utterly Heterosexual No Really, Like Bros way that ZZS takes WKX's wine jar. You know the incident we mean.)

The second thing that I really started turning over in my head here is the developing relationship between WKX and Chengling, and this is one of the things that took me so long on this one, because I wanted to go back and look at those two, specifically, in the previous eps again, and revisit their interactions both with and without the mediating factor of ZZS. The first time WXK sees Chengling is in the marketplace at the end of Ep 1 when Chengling ends up giving his token to ZZS. But I think the first time WKX sees Chengling is maybe when WKX’s sitting in the cutout window with his drinkie during the massacre of Mirror Lake and ZZS draws the Baiyi sword to protect Boatman Li and Chengling, just before they make it to the boat and float away back to the mainland. I don’t know how much of the beginning of the fight in the abandoned temple WKX then sees before A-Xiang makes her entrance, but there’s a lot of Chengling flinging himself in front of Boatman Li and ZZS in a way that’s not entirely dissimilar to the way Zhen Yan will fling himself at his parents’ bodies in flashback in a later episode, and then WKX definitely sees dying Boatman Li charge ZZS with Chengling’s care, then make Chengling bow, in a parallel to the scene we’ll get later when Qin Huaizhang accepts Zhen Yan as a Siji Manor shidi. In Ep 3, there’s a lot of weird sympathetic looks from WKX as A-Xiang berates Chengling over dinner (she doesn’t quite have this jiejie thing down yet, and she’s probably never had someone younger than her to take care of) for not taking care of himself so he can be strong and get his revenge for his family’s deaths. This time out, Ep 4, we start with the beggar gangs coming after Chengling, which has some resonance with the former Ghost Valley Master and his Ten Devils standing around the bodies of Zhen Yan’s parents and debating what they’re going to do with this kid before they steal him away. You can see WKX’s eyes start to narrow as the lead beggar dude talks, and he eventually even asks them, “What are you going to do if he doesn’t want to go, take him away by force?” We get a LOT of cutting to WKX in this conversation, even though he ostensibly has nothing to do with this, it’s really a convo between Beggar Guy, ZZS and Chengling. WKX pulls focus, and he eventually provokes that fight, and sure, he wants to see ZZS fighting and hopefully get a look at the Baiyi sword, and he even may think that’s the extent of his ulterior motives, but I’m not sure that actually is the full extent of his motives, there. This episode is also when we really see WKX start to encourage Chengling to continue to press at ZZS about taking him as a disciple, including the first use of the infamous “Tough women can’t resist clingy men” saying. Chengling comments that he was just supposed to be Son #3 who stayed home and took care of the old people, and WKX comes back with the Extremely Significant Comment that “When the children want to fulfill their filial piety, the parents have died,” which is not only Extremely Significant, but also sounds like it may be a quote from a poem or other literature? Anyway, a lot of this is just to say, KINDLY AU ANON WHO WAS THINKING ABOUT WRITING THE STORY IN WHICH WKX GETS CUSTODY OF CHENGLING BECAUSE ZZS IS NOT AT MIRROR LAKE, ARE YOU STILL OUT THERE? Hopefully you are hard at work, writing, because I have been having thoughts about this relationship.

What else? Kind of chronologically:

First of all, it continues to physically pain me to have to look at that horrifying facial hair, ZZS. I cannot WAIT to hit Ep 6.

We open this ep on WKX rolling walnuts in his hand in a way that is reminiscent of SOMEONE who we’ve seen do that before – multiple times, given they put that shot of Ghost Valley Master in the opening credits. Nevertheless, I didn’t catch this right away on my first time through. It took me a few episodes, and then I FINALLY noticed the opening credits shot right in front of my face. Point to you, show. Once you know, this ep practically shoves it in your face, recreating not only the walnut rolling, but a dude getting held up in the air and choked out (which we’ve seen before, in Ep 1 (and will see again)) before being slammed down on the ground with WKX crouched over him (which we’ve seen before, in Ep 1). Later, WKX is concerned about his manicure (which we’ve seen before, in Ep 1). It’s actually a little bit funny that both he and ZZS - a master assassin and a guy who literally skinned another dude (and maybe ate him?) to take his throne – are both so prissy about actual, literal blood. Anyway, is it significant or a coincidence that WKX waits until ZZS and Chengling are out of sight before actually going wild-eyed? You know the look I mean.

OH MY GOD, it’s Lovelace. I had blocked this dude from my mind. Eurgh. Nevertheless, there are a number of things I love about his scene, and all of them are related to A-Xiang, my feral beloved - from the way she clomps into the room, completely unworried about stepping the least bit gracefully while making her presence known and stomping (lit. and fig.) all over his dramatic little bit, to the way she berates him, threatens him with “Aunt Luo,” bares her teeth at him, and makes the eye-gouging motion at him. She is the best, and I adore her. I also love how she literally laughs in WKX’s face at his comment that maybe he just wants to be friends with ZZS, OK, is that alright?

The fight with the beggar gangs in this ep may be the first time we see something similar to the cage of spears maneuver in Prince Jin’s throne room all the way up in Ep … what? 30? … although it won’t be the last time we see it, and each time we see ZZS is perfectly capable of avoiding it or escaping it, making me suspect that Tian Chuang only “trapped” him in it because he let them, just like he only got taken back to Prince Jin in chains, in the first place, because he let it happen. We see it at 5:30 with the beggar gang’s staffs, when ZZS breaks it up by literally flinging another dude into the middle of it. We see it at 5:41, when he kicks his way out of the formation. And we see it at 8:15, when the sheaths have come off the swords, and he feints under them to break his way out. Just noticing.

When WKX is talking about the Baiyi sword as they all sit around ZZS’ sad little raw fish in the dirt by the lakeside, he mentions that Rong Changqing created three master works – the White Cloth sword, the Dragonback, and the “Great Wild Land,” per Youku’s translation. ZZS has the Baiyi sword, I assume the Dragonback is Ye Baiyi’s sword. Is the Great Wild Land actually the Ghost Valley? Given what we learn from Ye Baiyi in the back nine about Rong Changqing and his plans for Ghost Valley? Anyway, then we get some magic pipa playing, and ZZS (trying to, apparently) play WKX’s xiao in musical self-defense, and even though he leaves his opponent bleeding, WKX takes the opportunity to make suggestive comments about teaching him how to blow properly, just in case WKX’s been slacking on his act as a cheesy pick-up artist and anyone’s beginning to see through him. ZZS yells at Chengling for his lack of martial skill, then yells at him for crying, because that always works, particularly with traumatized teenagers who have had their entire family and sect massacred like, two nights ago. As a shifu, I’m not sure how you manage to inspire such devotion, my dude. WKX plays the indulgent parent, but also reassures Chengling that ZZS has good reasons for yelling at a traumatized, newly orphaned kid. I suppose he is getting him ready for all the yelling that’s going to go down once they get to Five Lakes Alliance and Chengling has to deal with Gao Chong and Shenshen. Chengling’s response, with WKX’s encouragement, is to ask to be ZZS’s disciple again. Was Han Ying (who I guess we’ve yet to actually meet at this point (EDIT TO ADD: NO WAIT, he was in Ep 1)) this much of a little dumbass to 24-year-old ZZS when Han Ying was 14? (EDIT 2 TO ADD: And who is writing this story, omg.) Although, ugh, that makes me realize that part of ZZS’s bad mood is that Chengling asking to be a disciple must be bringing up a shit-ton of bad stuff for ZZS about how he got all the other Siji Manor disciples killed. (Wen Kexing sees himself in Chengling, making his bow to Qin Huaizhang, one of the few good things that ever happened in his life, while ZZS sees all those red flowers on the mural back in his rooms in Prince Jin’s palace.) A final lakeside observation – A-Xiang pokes at ZZS’s uselessness as a cook here, and WKX will later ask him why he’s so utilitarian about food and drink, when they’re the greatest pleasures of life. (Really, WKX? THE greatest pleasures? Although that’s certainly an interesting comment given where we end up, in the end.) And it makes me begin to wonder �� is ZZS so bad at cooking, and does he continue to avoid it, at least partially because he’s already losing his senses enough so that it interferes with preparing a tasty meal?

Also, we meet the Four Scorpion Assassins, and Pretty Arhat and Evil Bodhisattva have some pretty bold names, but now I’m back on my thing about the women in this show, and wondering what kind of enlightenment or release these two feel like they’ve had, and how it may or may not resemble the mindset of the women of the Department of the Unfaithful in Ghost Valley. I’m not well-versed in Buddhism, though, and am maybe not the person to take on how that religious symbolism is or is not used as a metaphor for female freedom in this show.

This is getting kind of long, so one last observation for now, and I think I may have mentioned this before: WKX has color-coded ZZS and Chengling as a unit in the robes he bought for them when he also rented out the entire inn. He’s not in the same color, but he is in a complementary shade and tone, which I find interesting. Also, his sash is sort of salmon, not the red of his Ghost Valley getup, but not completely divorced from it, either.

[watch-grok-brainrot]

Everything Will Return to Nothing

山河令/Word of Honor Drabble Collection

By Haoppootamus Word Count: 1010 (including chapter titles) Rating: Teen And Up Characters: Zhou Zishu, Qin Jiuxiao,Bi Changfeng Content warning: Death, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Canon Typical Violence, ep 24 backstory spoiler, Blood, Canonical Dead Characters, Scars

Thank you @aowyn for the beta!

~~~

Ten

Time flows perpetually. It flowed over the lives of those from Siji Shanzhuang. It flowed across the dreams and aspirations of Zishu’s childhood. Time finds the path of least resistance and sweeps away love, hope, joy, and all good things. 

For ten years, Zishu did Prince Jin’s bidding. For ten years, he followed the path his cousin laid. For ten-too-many years, Zishu thought his choices were driven by and aligned with honor and duty. 

Ten years flew past. When Zishu finally saw Prince Jin’s true ambitions, all that remained were bitter regrets and seven deadly nails for his own chest.

Nine

Nine heavens. Jiuxiao. His shidi in name, but really, his little brother. His master’s son whom he helped raise. The bright eyed boy he never wanted harmed. The man whose woman Zishu personally sent off with a vial of poison. 

Zishu remembers the moment he recognized Jiuxiao’s lifeless face. He remembers reaching out a trembling hand and slowly peeling back the white cloth. He remembers the shock slamming into him like thunder. He remembers turning his own qi against himself in penitence, in punishment, in grief. He remembers the pain of reversing his qi flows. And he remembers little else. 

Eight

Eighty-one members of Siji Shanzhuang followed him to the capital. Eighty-one white plum blossoms adorned the wall of his home. Eighty plum blossoms coated in red by blood spilled. Eighty lives lost for Zishu’s choices. 

Eight and ten months have passed since Princess Jingan returned Jiuxiao’s body. Eight and ten months ago, he slowly embedded the first of six QiQiaoSanQiu nails into himself. He had failed to protect Jiuxiao, the one person he vowed to protect. Zishu suffered eighteen months of excruciating pain as each nail slowly took root into his meridians. Eighteen months seemed insufficient punishment for his crimes. 

Seven

Seven nails Zishu slammed into Bi Changfeng, the last of the eighty-one members of Siji Shanzhuang. Uncle Bi remained insistent despite Zishu’s protests: better to live one day free than wallow any longer as Prince Jin’s dog. Zishu’s aching acupoints echoed those words, shooting pain through his meridians and protesting his cowardice. 

For respect, Zishu personally placed the nails. For kindness, Zishu worked efficiently, hoping to minimize suffering. For brotherhood, Zishu did not look away, watching Uncle Bi seize up, grimace, and slump over as blood oozed from his acupoints and his lips. 

In hopelessness, Zishu turned and walked away.

Six

Six protruding scars on key acupoints stared back at Zishu from the mirror. 

Zishu traced his fingers over them, remembering how the four-cun nails rotated along their threads and sank into his flesh. The sharp tips punctured first his skin, then his muscles, and, finally, his meridians. As the nails twisted deeper, they snagged along the pathways carrying his qi, tugging and ripping. As his meridians fractured and frayed, the nails held strong, supporting the splintering tracts. As the wound formed into scars, the nails became a conduit for his qi, a conduit that counted down towards his last breath.

Five

Jiuxiao slept for five days and five nights after Zishu gave him the liquor laced with ZuiShengMengSi. Five days and five nights which changed Jiuxiao’s fate. 

What would have happened if Zishu made a different choice? What would have happened if that chasm did not form between them? Would Jiuxiao have married Princess Jingan? Would he have seen Jiuxiao dressed in red robes and not covered by a white cloth? 

What would have happened if Jiuxiao were not so loyal? Had Jiuxiao not tried to save Zishu, would he have been freed from TianChuang and allowed to live his life? 

Four 

Four requirements: untraceable, inescapable, omniscient, omnipresent. Four chains, binding Siji Shanzhuang’s fate to Prince Jin’s whims when Zishu formed TianChuang. 

Why did Zishu only consider their aptitude? “Untraceable,”“omniscient,” and “omnipresent” were effortless, but “inescapable” proved to be too much. How could men immersed in Jianghu cast aside their honorable hearts? How could Zishu have thought these men could become assassins and spies serving as shadows and wraiths?

When faced with choosing between their morality or yielding to the machinations of Prince Jin’s court, no one chose the latter. The choice was theirs, but their blood still stained Zishu’s hands.

Three

Three months Zishu waited between embedding each new QiQiaoSanQiu nail into himself. Three months allowed the nails and his body to merge. 

First, Zishu pushed nails into his YunMen acupoints situated on his ShouTaiYin meridians which governed his lungs. Next, he pushed nails into his QiMen acupoints, a nexus linking three meridians and affecting his liver. Finally, he placed nails into his FuAi acupoints, targeting his ZuTaiYin meridians and his spleen. 

As three vital organs and five meridians started failing, Zishu hid his perpetual coughs and chronic pain behind lingering internal injuries. This agony was fitting punishment for his crimes. 

Two 

Two lines carry his master’s legacy. “Flowers blooming persistently over four seasons. Events known exhaustively across nine provinces.” Ten characters on his wall extol Siji Shanzhuang’s beauty and power.

Seventy-nine plum blossoms, painted red by his hand. He dipped his brush into the paint and watched as the brush hairs pulled up the vermilion pigment. Vermilion, a red often reserved for the elite. As he coated the white petals, Uncle Bi’s words sounded in his mind, “Even Jiuxiao has passed. What remains of Siji Shanzhuang?” 

Zishu’s brush froze as he gazed at the vermilion blossom. Nothing. Without Jiuxiao, nothing remains. 

One

One lonely survivor from Siji Shanzhuang sat in an empty home, carving open six old scars. 

One lonely figure walked proudly through the palace snow, steeling himself for negotiation. 

Kneeling and stripping before Prince Jin, Zishu bared his chest. The six newly excavated QiQiaoSanQiu nails glistened red in the soft light diffusing through the throne room’s windows. The nails, like Zishu’s gaze, remained unyielding under Prince Jin’s anger. 

To know a man is to know his limits. Zishu, holding the last nail in hand, knew Prince Jin would grant him his request: misery, torment, death. Everything will return to nothing.  

Notes: 

cun is a chinese inch. I say this because we call inch an english cun. XD

Everything will return to nothing is a translation of 九九归一 which by character means nine nine returns to one. ZZS says it a lot in relation to Siji Shanzhuang

There were a lot of numbers that flew around in ep 1 and then repeated in the show. it got stuck in my head so i had to write this to eject it out

Gu Meng was on repeat the entire time i was working on this. It took HOURS. I don’t know if i’ve ever written an actual drabble before.. and then i decided to write 10... Sometimes i really do wonder if i’m stupid or simply masochistic. 

Zzs inverting is qi flows is one of my headcanons. Prince Jin stated in ep 1 that ever since Zishu passed out after seeing Jiuxiao's body, his internal injuries didn't heal. And I figured with Zishu's martial abilities and normal poise, the only reason that would happen is if he did it to himself. 

[the-ghost-of-jason-todd]

aight SO

i finished ep 12 and i've talked about it with a friend, and now i've also taken a look into the tarlos tag to get a sense of what people are saying. i think i'm ready to break this down.

so there are a few big questions about That Scene and the following tarlos interactions. i'll just work through them one at a time. buckle in, this is gonna get long. now without further ado...

1) Was TK lashing out at Carlos at the firehouse in character?

Short answer: yes and no.

Long answer: we've seen TK get physical and even violent before. He literally sought out a bar fight in s1. He nearly got into a fist fight with Judd, too. And did you see the way he was hurling darts after that, when he and Carlos were on their date? This boy is not a stranger to getting physical. There are, however, a few major differences between those scenes and this one with Carlos.

One. The bar fight was premeditated, while his fight with Carlos was not. Why is this important? Because it means that TK has shown some measure of restraint in the past. He managed to stay present during what I would call the 'trigger' of the bar fight episode, and saved his physical response for a later time.

Two. His altercation with Judd, on the other hand, was not premeditated. The difference, then, is that Judd was also ready to get physical at the time. With the scene with Carlos, Carlos was trying to remain calm and impartial for most of it, and attempted to de-escalate when TK got violent. The whole thing was driven by TK.

Three. In none of the scenes we've seen before of TK getting violent has his dad's health or safety been threatened. TK's dad is a HUGE part of his life, and he has a LOT of emotional trauma surrounding his relationship with his dad. He's TERRIFIED of losing Owen, because he's nearly lost him so many times before. TK has some MAJOR anxiety about losing people, to the point where he refused to let Carlos into his heart at the beginning of s1. There's also the fact that TK has gone through a lot of trauma in not a lot of time. Even if the show wants us to believe the kidnapping is over, I'm willing to bet that the after-effects are still hitting. For both TK AND Carlos, honestly.

There are also two other lines to consider when we're talking TK's characterization: first, in the episode when Gwyn moves out, and we see her and TK talking, she then calls Owen who asks if TK 'flew off the handle' (i believe that was the wording, correct me if I'm wrong). This is important because we have two people who are VERY close to TK talking about how he reacts to things, the crux of which is that TK gets reactionary. He has high emotional responses and says (or does) things that he doesn't necessarily mean.

Then there's another line that I think is important. This is the one in the crossover episode, when TK tells Buck that he's 'done a lot worse than steal a fire truck'. This one is important because it's TK talking about HIMSELF. We don't have any context for this or what it means, necessarily, but I'm willing to bet from context that he wasn't just talking about ODing.

So with all this in mind... do I think TK was in character? Do I really think TK would do this? Well... it makes sense in the context of TK's story and his arcs and all the scenes we've seen him in so far. But, at the same time, I would definitely have done it differently. It's a thing like... it's not a WRONG answer, but then again, was it really right, either?

2) Was Carlos's reaction to TK lashing out in character?

Short answer: yeah, I think so*.

*though if they don't expand on it I'm gonna have a problem.

Long answer: Carlos, at this point in the story, is dealing with two things that I think impact his emotional landscape a HELL of a lot.

One. His past and his family. He grew up with a man who seems emotionally distant, and it has only VERY RECENTLY started to get better. He felt INCREDIBLY alienated after he came out, and then when he became a cop and he was dealing with his father's silent disapproval. He is always searching for approval and, most likely, affection as well. What this means is that he feels like he constantly needs to prove himself, and bases his self worth on how OTHER people react. If someone reacts badly, that's a mark against himself.

"But Kay," you say, "What about the scene where he made dinner for TK and TK walked out? Carlos didn't blame himself then!"

Which is an interesting point! Carlos didn't put the onus on himself in that scene, he turned it back on TK, calling him 'crazy'. I think that was a secondary coping mechanism, to be honest. He knew he couldn't deal with feeling like he was the one who was wrong AGAIN so he twisted the situation around in his head until it was TK who was 'being crazy'. I've talked about that scene in depth before so I won't do it again, but Carlos's reaction is, I think, indicative of having felt rejection before and trying to protect himself.

Which brings me to number two. The fact that he's nearly lost TK several times already. This plays a HUGE role in how Carlos acts, especially with TK. Carlos has wanted TK LITERALLY from day 1, and since then he's nearly lost him how many times??? Enough, at least, that I'm fairly certain he's now holding on too tight, even when it comes back and hurts him. He just... he seems to have this mentality that if he's in he's ALL in, and he's not allowed to back away or put any distance between them, or else he'll lose TK for real.

Because we've seen TK pull back and get some distance before. We saw TK take a night away after their fight about the farmer's market. Maybe not with the best communication, but TK was angry and he needed space, so he left. When he did that, however, Carlos was convinced that they were breaking up. Like, CONVINCED. You cannot tell me that Carlos didn't think the worst in that moment.

Now why is THIS important? Easy. Because Carlos and TK may be moving forward in their relationship, but they are at a point right now where they react to things in fundamentally different ways. TK kind of bounces between becoming reactionary and going distant (again, we saw this in s2ep8 very clearly), while Carlos has reached a point where he kind of doubles down on holding tightly to TK even when he maybe shouldn't.

Basically, when you boil all this down, Carlos is DESPERATELY trying not to rock the boat, with his parents OR with TK, because he's scared of everything coming apart. And I think that makes sense with this episode.

The problem, then, is that this is a coping mechanism. The narrative has set it up as such. Which means that he's going to have to address it at some point. If he doesn't, I will be FUCKING PISSED, believe you me.

3) Did the narrative address that scene with respect, dignity, and nuance?

Short answer: I DON'T THINK SO.

Long answer: TK is human. He's a recovering addict. He's had problems with feeling numb in the past (that line about how everything is gray), which, I think, makes his feelings just THAT MUCH BIGGER when he does have them. So clearly, he's going to make mistakes. The question then is, was this particular mistake something he's learned from, or was it just used for the drama?

I have two reasons to believe it was the latter rather than the former.

One. Judd's reaction. Judd telling Carlos to get out of the firehouse after TK hit him, as if Carlos was the bad guy in that situation, was dramatic as hell. TK and Carlos are pitted against each other in that moment, and instead of mediating, Judd picked a side. Which is, ironically enough, the first thing that I think was NOT in character in that scene.

Judd, we know, is a bit of a hot-head, but he's also very empathetic. Judd was shown trying to mediate between Billy and Owen the last time the two of them had an episode together, because he understood both sides of the story and he cared for both of them. Why do I think it should have been the same this time? Well, because he loves TK and Carlos BOTH. They were both in the group hug at the hospital after the Ryder's car crash. It wasn't like Carlos stayed back, okay--JUDD CARES FOR BOTH OF THEM. And I think, at that point, that Judd would have seen the fact that TK was spinning out and Carlos was trying to stay objective and known that he needed to de-escalate. It would have been SO EASY to have that line be "Okay, okay, both of you step back and take a breather." He could EASILY have mediated. But he didn't. And that was a specific choice that leans more toward drama than anything else.

Which brings me to number two. The fact that they don't talk about it on screen. We had a hand-wavey 'we agreed no apologies' and a hot and heavy make-out scene instead. The writers wanted the drama of the two of them being in bed together while the fire started, and in order to do that they sacrificed the screen time it would have taken to actually have them have a conversation. Because, again, it would have been SO EASY to write them actually talking about it. They've done it before! After their fight about the farmer's market and Carlos's parents, the two of them have a WONDERFUL conversation. Why then and not now? Well, to make the fire more dramatic, to up the stakes one more time.

So no. I don't think there was any respect. I don't think there was any nuance. TK made a mistake, because he's human and he has some problems with emotional regulation, but there were little to no repercussions for it where there really should have been. There was no respect coming from the firefam for Carlos, either. There were no apologies, or further comments, or anything. And honestly... this season has done a lot toward making me feel like they don't give a shit about violence. Judd hitting that kid in the bear trap in the wild fire episode, Judd hitting the drunk driver who drove him off the road, Judd punching Billy when he thought he was framing Owen, and now TK hitting Carlos... all with no repercussions or apologies or even discussions about them... it's not a good look.

And there you have it. The writing makes sense. It does. But it's also really clear that the writers' priorities have changed. I really, honestly feel like the show has lost something since season 1. There's been a massive tonal shift, and I don't like it. The fact that we keep having Event after Event with no reprieve, have sacrificed conversations and interpersonal relationships for Drama, and have started killing and maiming characters with wild abandon, sometimes with seemingly no reason... it's all just a Lot. I have enjoyed watching season 2, but it's not sticking the same way as season 1 did. I'm not letting myself get attached to characters at this point because clearly we're not in a found family show anymore. I don't care about them the same way I did before. I can’t bring myself to do it when it’s becoming clear that we’re not going to slow down and actually process anything anytime soon.