#I mean I’m all for self improvement and becoming the best version of yourself
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A Venn Diagram with Heathers in one circle, Legally Blonde in the other and Mean Girls in the middle
#broadway#broadway musicals#heathers#legally blonde#mean girls#this is because when I think Mean Girls (the Broadway musical) I think of both heathers and legally blonde#I mean#mean girls is basically a pg version of heathers#but mean girls and legally blonde give off the same vibes#and they both have the main character being dumb because of a guy#girls please don’t change yourself dramatically because a guy doesn’t appreciate who you are#I mean I’m all for self improvement and becoming the best version of yourself#but do it for you#that’s the only way it’ll ever be genuine anyways#I haven’t watched any of the movies or musicals for these#but I have listened to all the Broadway musicals more than once#if I had the money I’d go and see them on stage#I know I could probably find a bootleg online somewhere or just watch the movies#but it’s not the same#also I would make the Venn diagram but I’m on a road trip and this is all on my phone so that seems like too much work
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The Subtle Art of Becoming "That Girl" in 2024 🌸✨
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Hello beautiful souls! It's me, Hana. If you are new reader then
Hi! I’m Hanalia and I want to empower women to prioritize their well-being while pursuing their dreams🌟
Today, I woke up feeling extra inspired by the #thatgirl aesthetic. You know her – she's the girl who embodies self-love, radiates positivity, and just seems to have her life beautifully organized. Personally, I believe, she's not just a trend; she's a movement towards becoming the best version of ourselves. And guess what? Becoming "that girl" isn't about perfection; it's about progress. It's about embracing the journey of self-improvement, self-care, and love. So, let's dive into a few ways you can bring a little bit of "that girl" magic into your everyday life:
1. Morning Rituals ✨
Start your day with purpose. Whether it's a morning skincare routine, meditation, or writing down your thoughts in a daily planner, find what centers you. If you have been following me for a while then you know how important this is. Remember, it's these small rituals that set the tone for a productive, positive day.
2. Self-Care Sundays 🛁
Dedicate time each week to pamper yourself. This could be a long bath, a skincare routine, or even a cozy evening with a book. It's all about showing yourself some love and appreciation.
I remember back in my childhood my older sister used to always have pamper sundays and I would always try and follow her footsteps however, back then your girl was as lazy as one can be...so zero exceptions. Be better than me girls and make the future you be proud.
3. Clean Girl Aesthetic 🌿
Embrace the clean girl aesthetic with a minimalist wardrobe, clean makeup looks, and a tidy space. A clutter-free environment not only looks good but also brings a sense of calm and order to your mind. Clean home = clean mind + remember clean body
4. Find Your Fitness Love 💕
Whether it's pink pilates, yoga, or a brisk walk in the park, find a physical activity that you love. It's not just about the physical benefits but the mental clarity and energy boost it brings.
5. Nourish to Flourish 🍓
Eating well is a form of self-respect. Fill your plate with colors, textures, and nutrients. It's not just about looking good, but feeling good from the inside out.
6. Learn and Grow 🌱
Embrace new hobbies, read more books, and challenge yourself to learn something new often. Growth is a huge part of becoming "that girl".
7. Stay Organized 📒
Invest in a good daily planner to keep track of your goals, appointments, and to-dos. There's something incredibly satisfying about ticking off tasks and staying on top of your game.
And here's a little secret for you: part of my "that girl" journey includes creating pieces that speak to my soul. I stumbled upon this adorable shop aka my Shop [GlowInGrow] that just screams self-care and love. My THAT GIRL planner is something that I did with love and my own hands. For me, it's not just a planner, it's my way of helping others because that's what being her is. Being her means she shares her secrets to help the rest of the girlies. MESSAGE ME FOR THE PROMO CODE *hint*
Also this planner has got you covered from setting your intentions and tracking your habits to planning your meals and self-care routines perfect for anyone looking to add that extra touch of mindfulness and beauty to their daily routine. It's subtle, but oh, so beautiful. 🌟
AND REMEMBER;
Becoming "that girl" isn't an overnight transformation. It's about making small, meaningful changes that align with who you are and who you aspire to be. Let's embrace this journey together, one step at a time. 💕
Last but not least, at the end of your journey of becoming that girl awaits the future who is The Girl!
Stay safe and stay hot...
With Love, Hanalia
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#thatgirl#selflove#selfcare#dailyplanner#glowup#selfimprovement#softgirl#lovecore#thatgirl2024#becomingher#That girl planner#that girl#that girl aesthetic#that girl routine#clean girl#daily planner#self love#self care#wonyoungism#becoming that girl#becoming her#self improvement#glow up#pink pilates princess#soft girl#that girl 2024
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Times I’ve inserted myself onto Zuko or Katara and helped myself.
I JUST made a post about self inserting on Katara and also Zuko and how it’s okay. This post will go over times I’ve done it and how I was able to help myself through rough times.
1. An except from “They Say Beauty is Pain”, a fic I wrote surrounding body image and dysmorphia.
”I don’t know. I guess I just…” she struggled to find the words to explain her feelings, “for lack of a better term, wish I liked my body more?”
[…]
”I think there are parts of ourselves that we all fail to understand and accept,” he finally began after a long pause. “I mean, look at me. I have a huge scar on my face but you sit next to me and tell me how beautiful it makes me. […] The same goes for you. […] Whatever you may dislike about yourself, I know I love it more than you could imagine. […] We all have things we’re insecure about, yeah. But I think the opinions that matter most are those closest to us and can best shape us to love ourselves the most. If that even makes sense.”
This entire one-shot was me writing about my experience with my body. As a firm hurt/comfort lover, I had to find a way for Katara (or me) to be comforted. This can go for my readers as well, people who may associate themselves with Katara and also suffer from body image issues can (I hope) read this and feel comforted about themselves.
2. An except from “Sleep When You Can, My Dear (I’ll Be Here When You Wake)” a fic I wrote about taking meds and the effects it can have on a person.
”For a long time, I didn’t know who I was without my trauma. It shaped my entire personality to who I am today. Every piece of me became what it was because of my own suffering. I didn’t know how different I would be if I… healed. The idea of a version of myself that wasn’t who I was in that moment was scary… But I realized, over time, that even though those moments will forever shape who I am as a person, they don’t have to define me. I am not some girl who lost her mother two years ago and goes to therapy for it. I’m more than that. And you’re more than the boy with father issues who needs medication. We improve ourselves each day by living and accepting that we can be better. And I look forward to knowing that the next day, I’ll get new experiences that will shape who I become.”
Guys, I can only write stuff like this by putting myself into the characters shoes. I actually technically inserted myself into BOTH Katara and Zuko to write this. How would I react to someone saying this? How would I comfort my partner (if I had one)?
3. An except from “The Psychology of a Test” which is about finding a balance between school and life.
“Zuko,” Katara finally said, lowering her voice and finally becoming more calm, “I don’t really know much about your relationship with your dad- or school. But it was so nice seeing you actually happy and talking these past few days. It really put things into perspective for me. I realize that I’ve been studying so much all the time, that I never thought about how it affected you. I’m sorry.”
“What? No, don’t be sorry. My relationship with school is.. complicated at best, but in no way is any of it your fault,” he sat up to face Katara, “but I have realized how much more I like being free. I just need to find a balance.”
“Could I- could I help you find it?” Katara asked after a short moment has passed.
“I’d love that.”
Many published authors will say that what they write is based on real experiences they have gone through. Why is it okay for published authors to do this and not fanfiction authors?
Don’t let ANYONE tell you that you can’t write characters to connect with you.
You CAN.
#atla#zutara#atla katara#atla zuko#avatar the last airbender#katara#zuko#fanfiction#katara x zuko#zuko x katara#atla fandom critical
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The Flavor of MTG: Blue, the Color of Progress(Part 1)
Prologue
Before we really dive into this color philosophy I have to get the usual stuff out of the way. If you haven’t read the previous, albeit really long, article covering some of the more general aspects of the Color Pie then you should probably do so, even if only to decrease the chance that you ask a question I’ve already gone over or to make sure that I don’t have to repeat myself over and over(You can read said article on Tumblr here(https://douglysium.tumblr.com/private/672979718186975232/tumblr_r5hjo0WAWg1ycm9nu) and on Google Docs here(https://docs.google.com/document/d/1y1d7vBZozSEmkARSeGYj4onyty6uAXlooaXKR9WxLOI/edit)). I should also mention that today I am focusing on MONO-Blue as a color philosophy. This means some specifics here may not apply to every color combination that includes Blue. It is also important to remember that the color pie is ultimately a vague philosophical archetype, not a personality archetype(even if a personality can be influenced by one’s personal philosophy). When I say things like a color’s “strength and weaknesses” there are definitely exceptions and know that I am speaking broadly and mostly talking about the behaviors and personalities that such a philosophy either attracts/encourages or discourages. Also, the color philosophies are all about what people find most important. So when I say something like Blue likes knowledge and Black cares about the self that does not mean that it is all those colors care about. Even Blue may care about emotions, Black may still care about others, and White often still cares about the individual. It’s just that those things come second fiddle to other things and should not get in the way of their primary goals. I should also note that because this article is about Blue and I do not have infinite time I will mainly be covering things from Blue’s perspective. So sorry if it comes off like I’m just bashing Red and Green philosophy at any point but I promise that those colors will get their chance to shine in their own articles one day. What I’m saying is don’t base your entire view of Blue’s enemy colors on this article since it probably won’t be the most flattering perspective.
General
One thing that all the color philosophies in Magic have is a little phrase that helps summarize their philosophy. This phrase basically has two parts, the end goal of the color and how they seek to achieve that. In Blue’s case, its phrase is “Perfection through Knowledge.” In this case, the end goal is “Perfection” and the means is “Knowledge.” What this is supposed to tell us is that Blue philosophy is all about perfecting one’s self and the world around it and creating a world where everyone and everything can be the best version of themselves. I think it’s important to clarify the wording here for Blue is not saying you literally need to be perfect or never make a mistake. Only that you should strive to be the best version of yourself you can be. In the case of Blue, perfection isn’t an end goal but an endless process and a mindset saying you should be constantly striving to do better. Since Blue is all about being the best you can be, its philosophy is often summarized as perfection since if you're striving constantly to become better and better constantly then you are always striving to get as close to perfection as possible. If I had to put it in a simpler way, Blue is about “Improvement/Progress through Knowledge.”
The way Blue believes we should achieve this is through the aforementioned knowledge. Blue is a philosophy that believes anything and everything can theoretically be understood and made possible as long as you have the knowledge, tools, time, and dedication. To this end, it is important to properly obtain and use knowledge since Blue believes almost anything can be achieved if you have the proper knowledge, resources, and time. In order to utilize this knowledge it is important to use your head and think through your actions as much as possible. Blue is a philosophy that strives to be open to any possibility but not too hasty to action because everything has a theoretical solution if the right amount of time, energy, and understanding is applied. This tends to mean Blue is generally against both impulse and instinct. Now Blue isn’t inherently against any and all emotions and it often acknowledges emotions as a powerful force(which makes discipline and forethought all the more important). Blue is simply arguing that you shouldn’t let things like emotions and instincts control you without tempering them with thought and reason because they often spur short-sighted actions that can hurt you in the long run. While they can grant you quick satisfaction, if improperly controlled they can come back to bite you later(or even immediately). Also, just going with whatever you immediately feel tends to conflict with Blue’s ideal of not making hasty decisions because Blue wants to strive to make the best and most optimal decision as much as possible. Part of doing that is keeping in mind more long-term goals over transient short-sighted ones and keeping the big picture in mind so that you can properly understand the ramifications of your actions and choices. Blue also understands that there are typically a limited amount of resources and time one has access to and to Blue it is important to maximize these resources by making informed, thoughtful, and considered decisions.
Similar to how White has some notable ways it tends to use structure, Blue has some notable ways it tends to approach and use knowledge. First off, since Blue believes knowledge, understanding, and thought are the key to everything it is often advocating for as much knowledge as possible and gathering any knowledge it comes across since you never know when the knowledge may become helpful in the future. There is also the fact that Blue may not always know or be aware of the knowledge it may need which can also often encourage it to collect as much knowledge as possible in order to increase the chances that it finds out something it didn’t know it needed or if the knowledge becomes helpful later. This often gives Blue an emphasis in regard to learning and education as these are some of the best tools to acquire more knowledge. This also tends to extend to a more structural level and not just individual levels. From Blue’s perspective, being the best self you can also mean that the society in which individuals reside needs to also be the best it can be. So Blue tends to prioritize things like education systems, libraries, schools, and other structured systems in regard to education. These can act as vectors for people obtaining the knowledge to become whatever it is that they consider to be their best selves as well as allow for Blue to obtain even more knowledge in order to give it an edge and allow it to overcome obstacles. If Black’s goal can be described as attempting to become as close to omnipotent(all-powerful) as possible so that it can get everything it needs, Blue’s can be described as one that strives to be as close to omniscient(being all-knowing) as possible.
Mark has given us 4 notable ways Blue may like to use knowledge in his “True Blue Revisited” article. Firstly, knowledge can be used to control people or get them to act in a way that is beneficial for you, others, or society via withholding pieces of information. Secondly, it can act as a key, allowing those with the right info to access or do things others do not know how to do. Those who know the proper words or actions may know how to do things others cannot. Thirdly, it can act as a form of protection. It goes without saying that if you know something’s coming you can better prepare for it and if you know what exactly something even is you may be able to use it to your advantage or exploit a weakness. Fourthly, it can be used as a weapon or a form of attack. This sort of ties into the first point since while controlling knowledge gives you the ability to exercise control over others, knowing/exposing the right piece of knowledge or secret information can be quite devastating(think stuff like blackmail or exposing weaknesses to the public).
Also, restricting someone’s information by lying, deceiving, hiding it, etc. can give a tactical advantage since they may not even realize there’s anything to fight back against or how to do it.
Blue is also a color philosophy that is more likely to take advantage of technicalities or utilize loopholes in laws and/or rules to get what it wants since it is a philosophy that is all about nuance and understanding the world around it and how they function. This emphasis on knowledge and understanding means that Blue often has a respect for science, since science is quite literally defined by the dictionary as “the intellectual and practical activity encompassing the systematic study of the structure and behavior of the physical and natural world through observation and experiment.”, “a systematically organized body of knowledge on a particular subject”, or “knowledge of any kind” and science is literally all about understanding how things work. Now just to be clear, you don’t need to be a scientist or specifically engage in science first and foremost per se to be Blue, but that’s something I’ll get into later. Tying in with Blue’s themes of knowledge and understanding, Blue is a philosophy that believes every phenomenon that exists or happens has an explanation for how and why it occurs even if we have yet to figure it out. This adds an aspect of questioning basically everything as much as possible since anything and everything can theoretically be understood in due time and under the right circumstances. Where colors like White or Green may see events as holy miracles or some sort of occurrence that cannot always be explained, Blue argues that there is an explanation for how and why these events occur. Although, this is not to say that Blue could never attribute something to a god or some sort of magic(even if I would say that in general Blue would probably usually, but not always, subscribe to the “Magic is just science we don’t yet understand yet” style of thinking. Although it is important to acknowledge that for some people and places within the multiverse some sort of magic, supernatural occurrence, or similar explanation could be a valid one for them).
This brings us to Blue’s themes of perfection, self-improvement, and technology(as they are all related). As mentioned, Blue is all about being the best self one can be via knowledge and forethought. This ties in with some of Blue’s philosophy as Blue believes anything is possible and everything is a blank slate. When I say this I don’t mean Blue believes you can just magically start flying because you think about doing it hard enough or that it doesn’t believe in genetics or being more likely to be predisposed to certain things. Rather that everyone basically has infinite potential and there is a way to achieve what they want or want to be. Let me put it this way, if someone is born blind then they may be able to have perfect 20/20 vision via glasses, contacts, or surgery.
If something is born without wings to grant it the ability to fly then it may be possible to grant it flight using something like a jetpack, flying vehicle(such as an airplane), or maybe even some crazy futuristic genetic engineering to change someone’s very DNA.
This is all to say, Blue isn’t claiming you can just will yourself to grow wings or have perfect vision but rather that with the right amount of knowledge, one can do these things in order to make themselves better if they so choose. This is where Blue’s themes of technology come in since said devices and technology allow you to alter yourself and/or do things that you could not do on your own.
Normally, humans cannot fly but airplanes change that. Normally, nearsighted people cannot just manifest 20/20 vision but glasses change that. So Blue’s idea of a blank slate is more the idea that there is a path that allows you to become whatever it is you want to be if you take the right steps and make the best-informed choices possible and that it is possible for you to overcome and/or break free of things like genetics, fate, destiny, etc.
Blue also has a mindset that encourages one to never give up since there is basically always a way to get what they want. In Blue’s eyes even if it were to assume there is some hypothetical that could literally never be achieved no matter how much knowledge one obtained and no matter how advanced technology became there would be no way of knowing unless you are actually trying to achieve it anyway. The best way I can put it is through an example given in Mark Rosewater’s “STRIVING FOR PERFECTION” article: “For years no human was able to run a mile in under four minutes. Physiologists at the time claimed that it was quite possibly beyond the ability of the human body and that the mere attempt at such a thing would be dangerous to the athlete that tried it. Then one day a man named Roger Bannister did it. Forty-six days later another runner broke the four-minute barrier. Within three years, fourteen more runners had also done it. Now it's the standard for mid-distance runners… It was an impossible task, that is, until someone did it. Then it became a doable task and many people did it. The only barrier was a mental one. Runners couldn't do it because they didn't believe it was possible. Once it was proven possible, it completely changed how they approached the problem. People can do things they believe they can do. If you take a task at hand and assume you can do it, guess what happens? You do it.” This type of perspective in regards to the potential most people have is what Blue’s mindset may often be likened to. In a way in order to understand what is truly possible Blue is saying we must approach everything with the assumption that it is somehow possible. All the color philosophies basically have an answer for what your goal in life should be and how to achieve that and in Blue’s case that goal is basically pushing yourself to the limit and being the very best you can be while constantly seeking to better yourself and the world around you so it can in turn encourage and facilitate ways for you and others to be better. Blue is interesting in that it stresses that one must be flexible and open to all the possibilities while also not being too hasty or quick to action(as to give yourself time to figure out the best possible decisions). Of course, like all color philosophies, Blue usually wants a society that encourages this. So it will typically advocate for citizens being granted good opportunities for education, places to safely experience things through trial and error(as outside of controlled situations you should strive to make as few errors as possible), and some way to access the best and most recent tools and technology so they to can gain the knowledge and understanding needed to better themselves, the society they live in, and the world around them. Blue philosophy is ultimately, and succinctly, revolving around self-actualization(which is defined as “the realization or fulfillment of one's talents and potentialities, especially considered as a drive or need present in everyone.”)
Blue’s emphasis on knowledge, understanding, information, and forethought means that within Magic it often has an emphasis on academics, books & other repositories of information, mind/thought, control, memory, manipulation, artifice, trickery, subtlety, complexity, and illusions. Of course, the emphasis on knowledge means that Blue also has symbolic associations with the mind, and by extension abilities and magic relating to the mind and information regarding it, like telepathy and telekinesis. On the other hand, Blue’s emphasis on utilizing your time to the absolute fullest in order to gather as much information and time to think as possible tends to associate it with time-based magic and passivity and Blue’s emphasis on progress, betterment and what could be what gives it some future symbolism. Meanwhile, Blue’s emphasis on technology, improvement, and tools gives it a strong symbolic connection to construction/technology, artifacts, and man-made items.
Requirements
As with my previous discussion about White philosophy and beliefs, I think it's important to help cement a more concrete understanding of what one needs to believe in to be Blue aligned. I’ll do this by discussing the most basic and barebone ideals needed to potentially qualify for being Blue aligned. Of course there are a couple of disclaimers. It’s important to remember the Color Pie is a vague philosophical and value archetype. The color pie is ultimately about VALUES and IDEALS. A Blue character can end up being hot headed and overemotional, although they would normally see this as a flaw/mistake or potentially have some sort of self justification for it, and not every person who values knowledge is necessarily Mono-Blue or even has Blue in their color identity at all because they may have a different outlook on life or value something more important than progress and knowledge. They may also think knowledge should be used for a purpose different from that of what Blue says. Also, this article is specifically about Mono-Blue so these requirements are only meant to apply to just Blue, and any color combinations that contain Blue mixed with other colors may not necessarily follow the same rules, for example: it is possible to be Blue-Red aligned and believe that your emotions are more important than thinking things through.
First off, in order to be Blue aligned, one must believe that theoretically anything is possible and can be understood with the right amount of time, advanced enough technology and/or a certain amount of knowledge. As mentioned before Blue isn't foolish enough to believe that you can just grow wings with the power of thought but it may be possible in the distant future to create artificial wings, jetpacks, or vehicles that could carry you just as well, or even better, than any naturally occurring wings. Blue can also concede things like the fact that being literally perfect and without flaws is impossible. It’s a philosophy that believes that everything in the universe can theoretically be understood with enough time, advanced enough technology, and/or a certain amount of knowledge and thus believes everything has an explanation even if we do not know what said explanation is at the moment. We might not be able to grow wings or understand all the mysteries of the universe now but who knows? Maybe in a 1,000 years, these things and how they work will be as common as running water or something. If it wasn’t clear from some of my examples you don’t need to believe that LITERALLY anything and everything is possible or that there are no limitations. Like Blue isn’t about to say that a random ass roaches on the sidewalk is about to start inventing advanced technology just because it wills it or that it could reach the same kind of thoughts as a human without outside interference. It’s also important to remember that one tends to only have a limited amount of resources and time(which is why Blue would often say you need to make the best decisions possible). There are plenty of Blue characters that would argue one can never become completely perfect or that achieving something isn’t feasible within a certain amount of time or time frame and for many it would be utterly ridiculous to believe that a human could do something like break the sound barrier while running through sheer force of will and no outside technology to aid them or that you can achieve omniscience and understand all of the universe with the current level of technology.
Secondly, and most obvious, one has to believe in following their mind and using forethought over one’s emotions. This also ties in with the idea of knowledge being powerful and most important since the knowledge you gather allows you to make better decisions and letting your emotions have you just constantly make shortsighted and hair-brained decisions would just put that knowledge to waste. Doing something because “I just felt like it” outside of specific situations(such as a game or something) usually isn’t going to cut it even if you can understand where it is coming from.
Thirdly, you must believe that everyone is a blank slate. As mentioned before this does not mean one needs to straight up completely not believe that things like being predisposed towards certain things via genetics or biology or even destiny and/or fate exist. Rather that it is possible, in one way or another through willpower, discipline, knowledge, technology, etc. to change, overcome and/or break free of these things in one way or another.
Essentially, these are not the end-all-be-all limits for what we can and can’t do as long as we have the technology, time, and/or knowledge to do so. Blue philosophy tends to fall under various types of tabula rasa style schools of thought(that the human mind receives knowledge and forms itself based on experience alone, without any pre-existing innate ideas that would serve as a starting point. Tabula rasa thus implies that individual human beings are born "blank" (with no built-in mental content) and that their identity is defined entirely by their experiences and sensory perceptions of the outside world… ).
A Colorful Quote
In order to hopefully better understand where each color is coming from, even if you may ultimately disagree with it, I thought it would be helpful to pick a quote that I felt really resonated or matched with the color's themes/ideals in order to help package the color in a philosophical form of thought you may be more familiar with or understand.
The first quote is Lao Tzu’s “If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime.” I feel like this quote does a pretty good job of showing why Blue tends to put all its stock in knowledge and understanding. As that knowledge allows you to do anything and can also be used to aid and better yourself. Understanding and knowing how to fish and how fishing works puts people in a better position than just never accumulating the knowledge while continuously buying fish without thought. Teaching people how to fish instead of just hoarding the knowledge can also allow for a better society and the world. Since dispensing the knowledge of how to fish allows more people to gather food which means society has more food. Having this knowledge also puts one in a position of power since if you know how to fish but your clients do not then they are more likely to have to rely on you and do what you say for food. “Knowledge is power” as they say(a phrase we’ll come back to later). Similarly, the famous Sun Tzu quote “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle” also shows how a philosophy that puts all its stock in knowledge might be appealing to Blue, and both quotes display that when Blue is faced with a problem it almost always advocates to tackle it from the angle of knowledge. The first quote also shows how knowledge can be used to make the world a better place, by teaching others, and this Sun Tzu quote also displays that while knowledge can be used to make the world a better place it can also act as an offensive or defensive weapon by understanding a situation or knowing something your enemies do not.
"Mind over matter" is a popular phrase and is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “-used to describe a situation in which someone is able to control a physical condition, problem, etc., by using the mind.” As mentioned before, Blue doesn’t necessarily believe you can say just start growing wings through sheer force of will but I feel like this quote still tends to embody a very Blue mindset or goal. Mind over matter situations are going to be the types of situations Blue tends to gravitate towards, and views problems as, because Blue believes that knowledge, willpower, and time can allow you to overcome many different kinds of weaknesses and problems.
The emphasis on mind over matter is also why in the game of MTG Blue tends to get things like telekinesis, an ability that allows one to perform physical actions using the mind and may even allow them to do things they could not do physically. While Blue can still believe in getting jacked and perfecting one’s body/physique it will argue that the best way to approach this is through knowledge and understanding. At the end of the day if you can understand the why and how something works it is possible to exert your will over it in some way and get the desired result. You may be able to increase your stamina while running by pushing yourself to the limit and exercising or by using some specific running technique. As pointed out earlier, from the perspective of Blue how can we know what truly is or isn’t possible for both the world around us and ourselves if we don’t push ourselves. I’m sure everyone had a situation or thing that they thought they would be bad at but turned out to be actually decent at or enjoy it. Or maybe you thought something like “I’ll never be a good artist” only to see how far you’ve come a couple years later.
“Knowledge is power” is a phrase that one could argue may apply a bit more to Dimir(Blue-Black) philosophy but I think it also applies to Blue quite well, and while Black and Blue do overlap in an emphasis on knowledge, Black sees power somewhat differently than Blue and doesn’t always see knowledge as being synonymous with power. However, I’ll get into that later. Of course, the color philosophy that believes knowledge and understanding can be used as a way to achieve anything would also see those things as the vectors for obtaining power and control if it really wants or needs to. This quote is also meant to emphasize the importance of passing on knowledge and education which is usually going to be important to Blue philosophy. Knowledge gives you the power to gain control over your own life. Similarly, Martin Luther King Jr’s “Science gives man knowledge, which is power; religion gives man wisdom, which is control” hits a lot of the same beats(even if it might be overall a more White-Blue or Bant(Green-White-Blue) quote).
“Measure twice cut once” is a quote that I feel perfectly encapsulates Blue’s ideals of trying to take as much time as possible while using the knowledge you have to make the best possible decisions. One only has so much resources and so much time so it is best to avoid careless mistakes or accidents as much as possible. You shouldn’t just go with whatever your emotions or gut tells you but always be trying to use your brain. Your emotions and what you want aren’t always the things you need and may sometimes only offer short-term gratification at the expense of more important or long term goals. You also shouldn’t rush things and try to take the time to understand a situation/problem as much as you can. Doing this can also save you even more time down the line than just rushing in would have.
Finally, “knowledge is its own reward” is probably one of the most Blue quotes out there. Out of all the colors Blue is the one that is most likely to be concerned about knowledge for knowledge’s sake because it wants to accumulate as much as possible since you never know when said knowledge may come in handy and it may reveal yet another bit of knowledge you didn’t know you needed. While Blue does have its own reasons for wanting to obtain knowledge, such as perfection and self-betterment, the other colors, such as White and Black, are less likely to care about knowledge for its own sake and are more likely to see it as just a means to an end.
Philosophical Strengths
Despite all of Blue’s themes of perfection, nothing is truly perfect and that goes for all color philosophies, including Blue. However, before I go over Blue’s philosophical weaknesses it is vital to go over Blue’s philosophical strengths in order to show some of the upsides and positives its philosophy can often encourage.
Blue’s most obvious and noteworthy strength is how it can encourage the use of knowledge and information. Blue does not only seek to figure out the best ways to acquire knowledge but also how to properly use knowledge as a tool. This encourages a way of approaching things that involves taking the time to utilize said knowledge by looking at the big picture/plan, and trying to figure out the consequences of each and every action they take. Blue strives to never act careless or without great thought and this can lead it to being less likely to make obvious or avoidable mistakes and consequences(but this does not make them immune to them mind you. No one is perfect). This also ties in with how Blue values restraint due to prioritizing using one’s knowledge and forethought over letting one’s emotions control them. This is another factor that can encourage the avoidance of careless mistakes. Blue argues for preparing for the long game and big picture and tries to not let its emotions ruin more important or bigger term goals for short term gratification. Blue’s prioritization of knowledge and understanding also makes it more likely to notice, understand, and/or utilize nuance(s) that may otherwise be missed.
Going back to knowledge being a powerful tool, it is important to remember that one such way it can act as a tool is by being a weapon. It’s easy to see Blue and assume it just wants to spread knowledge constantly at all times but since Blue sees knowledge as vital when it’s approaching an opponent it seeks to not only use its own knowledge but restrict the knowledge of its opponent. This means Blue is more likely to lean into things like secrets, trickery, disinformation, and lies. By restricting someone’s access to information/knowledge you gain a tactical advantage because at the end of the day there’s only so much someone can do if they don’t even know they’re in any danger or what you even plan to do.
Due to this, Blue can have a bit of an underhanded sneaky quality that some people may miss when discussing its color philosophy, but I mean it is ally colors with Black(a color that’s all about doing literally whatever it takes to get on top.) so this trait is to be expected to one degree or another.
Philosophical weaknesses
Now for the weaknesses. A philosophy all about knowledge and understanding may be seen as being objectively all upside by a lot of MTG players at first, but nothing is perfect. Even Blue still has some weaknesses.
For one, Blue philosophy is one that can encourage being very passive to a fault. Striving to think just about everything through and utilize all the time available to do so can make quick decision making or taking immediate/spontaneous action difficult unless you already knew something was coming. This means that Blue may be prone to being outsped by others or opponents taking initiative and making a decision before it can figure out the best course of action. Simultaneously, this can also severely limit Blue’s flexibility. Blue is ultimately a philosophy that is extremely adaptive since it's all about “anything is possible,” and “everyone is a blank slate” but it is not the best at encouraging on going with the flow and/or being flexible enough to change and adapt on a dime. Blue is all about finding answers and improving but via an overall slow process of carefully considered knowledge and thought. This also segways nicely into my next point. While it can act as a strength, Blue’s restraint can also become a weakness when pushed too far. Due to Blue doing all it can to take its time and fully understand what’s happening in order to make the best decision possible it may end up becoming paralyzed and not making a proper decision. Think of it this way, Blue is all about being the best you one can be and part of doing that is trying to make as few mistakes as possible while also making the best decisions one can make. This means that Blue can sometimes end up becoming “paralyzed” while it tries to figure out not just what choice(s) to make but what is the very BEST choice(s) it can possibly make while considering all the nuances and trying to avoid any mistakes.
This can encourage inactivity and even potentially not making any choices at all or not making a choice in time out of fear that one may make a mistake, bad decision, or a suboptimal choice. This is another factor that can encourage a mindset that leads to one not making decisions fast enough.
Another way that Blue’s emphasis on knowledge can end up acting as a weakness is that Blue is a philosophy that tends to want to put all its eggs in the metaphorical basket of understanding what’s going on. This can once again add on to Blue’s weakness of acting too slowly or not at all, as Blue may struggle to come to a decision if it is put in a situation in which it can’t or has trouble understanding what’s going on. The other colors are more likely to advocate for taking action or make a choice even if they don’t or can’t completely understand the full picture of what is happening or what they are facing. This also means that Blue is usually the slowest out of the five colors in mindset, flavor, mechanics, and gameplay.
Another thing to consider is that Blue believes almost anything is possible. Which can, when pushed too far, encourage an outlook that pushes someone way too hard or tries to force things to change/happen in order to prove something or because it feels like it can. This can be sort of seen with some of the Green-Blue Simic Combine’s, the Blue-Red Izzet League’s experiments, as well as some of the horrifying creatures created by Innistrad’s various Blue mad scientists and Black-Blue stitchers. The best way to think about it is there is a sort of Victor Frankenstein side to Blue. The idea that everything can be known and mastered. This can sometimes lead to this philosophy pushing things a bit too far in the same way most people agree that Victor probably shouldn’t have been messing with life in the way he did. To Blue, The world is everyone’s sandbox in a way, anything can be improved and fiddled with.
Sometimes Blue encourages one to push themselves, others, or the world around them too far just to see if it can or in order to better understand it. To Blue, the world is its canvas in a sense.
Common Misconceptions
This brings me to what is becoming one of my favorite parts to cover in regards to color the Color Pie. One thing I’ve noticed about the Color Pie is there tend to be a lot of misconceptions about it in general. This is understandable because most people aren’t losers who will read and listen to all of Mark Rosewater’s Color Pie teachings and probably won’t technically need to know much about it outside of general gameplay mechanics. Although, of course, I still want to tackle these common misconceptions to show some of the work and understanding that Magic’s designers and writers have that people may overlook. I also want to hopefully make any conversations someone may have about the Color Pie more informed, nuanced, and productive.
One of THE MOST common misconceptions I see is that being Blue makes you smart, or that being smart must mean you’re Blue. This also tends to extend to people who begin to self identify as Blue and identify other people as Blue because they are smart and not because they actually agree with Blue philosophy. First off, just thinking a lot or appreciating thought doesn’t make one any more Blue then having emotions makes someone Red, having to eat makes someone Green, or wanting rules/regulations makes someone White. The color pie is a VALUE system; it ultimately comes down to what one values as more or less important. The other colors can all value or like being smart or intelligent but may not see gathering knowledge and information in order to improve yourself as the most important thing we should strive for. Furthermore, it also comes down to how you would argue one should use said knowledge. Blue would argue you should use knowledge and understanding to better oneself(although if you want to include multicolored identities it is possible to have Blue in a color identity and see knowledge as a thing that should be used for some other goal. However, my point still stands). This brings me to the other point. Blue VALUES knowledge but simply valuing something doesn’t automatically mean you have it in spades. Just valuing information doesn’t mean you have it and just valuing being smart doesn’t mean you are smart. Let me put it another way, not all Black aligned characters are powerful just because they value power and ruthlessness and not all White aligned characters are kind and just people simply because they value those things. That’s like saying that just because you want to be rich that means you are rich. You can have weak Black aligned characters and asshole White aligned characters. Likewise, you can have stupid or uninformed Blue characters.
The truth is, just merely being smart is a trait that anyone of any color or color combination can have in the same way that something like being emotional or shy is. This kind of goes hand in hand with the misconception that the Red alignment is somehow inherently stupid even though Red can be quite smart.
In fact White, Black, AND Green all greatly value knowledge in their philosophies, but just in their own different ways.
Now it is important to acknowledge that personal philosophy can influence traits or personality even if they aren’t one to one. You don’t need to be super emotional to be Red aligned but, since Red is all about following your heart and doing whatever your emotions tell you one could argue or acknowledge a Red aligned character is more likely to act emotional. So one could argue that a Blue aligned character may be more likely to come off as smart or knowledgeable because they are likely to reward themselves for going out of their way to seek knowledge and information, and a Black character is more likely to seem powerful because they have a philosophy that rewards being power hungry. However, there can easily be an overly emotional Blue aligned character who struggles to control their emotions, sees their emotions as justified, or feels that they aren’t letting their emotions control them even if they actually are(people are weird and aren’t always perfectly rational. Sometimes people convince themselves that what they are doing fits in line with their world view or is justified). I would also be remiss not to mention the impact Magic’s cards themselves may have on the general public’s perception of a color. It is important to remember that most(but not all) cards are depicting things from their associated color(s) perspective.
So the reason Blue cards may often come off as “smart” is the same reason so many White cards may invoke heroism and all kinds of heroic and “good” traits. That’s how the color itself tends to view said action or person being depicted on the card. Blue wants to be smart and make the most calculated and logical moves by utilizing all the information it has available. Also, being Blue doesn’t mean you are well rounded in your knowledge or have a perfectly even field of expertise on almost all subjects while spouting fun facts the entire time. Blue is ultimately all about using knowledge to better yourself so if your best self involves idk becoming an artist or something then one may tend to seek out information regarding art and art techniques and is less likely to go out of their way to understand how a car engine works.
I mean, yes Blue will argue you should obtain knowledge as you can because you never know if it will be useful or reveal something you didn’t know would help you(I mean I’m sure everyone has heard stories of how say a football player learning ballet helped them play football better and the like) but Blue also acknowledges that most people have limited time and resources. Which in its eyes, making careful and considered decisions through knowledge in order to avoid as many mistakes as possible and make the best decisions possible is so important. Not everyone has the time to read through an entire library so it is important to carefully pick and choose what you want to do so you can better yourself. Additionally, Blue isn’t even saying you need to be good at everything. Your best self may specialize in a very specific category or may not be a jack-of-all-trades. The point here is that Blue philosophy isn’t one that is just about being the smartest person in any given room. It is about self-improvement.
#mtg#magic the gathering#color pie#color philosophy#mtg article#TheTasteOfMagicTheGathering#TheFlavorOfMagicTheGathering#Douglysium
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I wanted to let you know that your detailed critique of Gwilin fics has inspired me to give better criticism and that your love for Gwilin has been transferred to me - I’m feral for him now
NO WAYYY SOMEONE IS ASS-DEEP IN MY BLOG READING THOSE THANGS??? 😭😭 You honor me...
I'm glad you've gotten something out of them!! I wrote them with a lot of love and care. I feel that sometimes fanfic authors want their work to be treated with the same esteem as more traditional works of literature, but are quick to shy away or outright reject the opportunity to receive and respond to structured, systematic criticism. Which, y'know, there's no rule that says you have to entertain such criticism, but, when you do, you have a greater chance of perfecting your craft, which is all anyone can hope to do with their art. Not for money or so you can achieve some standard, personal or societal or otherwise, of what an 'improved' version of your art would look like, but so you can better convey what it is you hope to convey. Goodness knows some people can get really out of pocket with the things they say in response to art, though, so the apprehension is understandable.
That being said, there are few more satisfying feelings than knowing you're getting better at being able to transmit your vision to others. That doesn't mean others won't misunderstand or misinterpret your art, just that you'll achieve an ever-greater understanding of what effect you can create in an audience through it. Best way to do that is through self-revision and, yes, engagement with criticism.
(As a bonus, if you don't take yourself too darn seriously, you can even find artistic gratification in how your work is misconstrued xD lol)
I kept a light touch for a lot of the reviews for that very reason. Sometimes I fear people conflate honest, well-intentioned feedback with someone attacking their work or their vision for their art, and this can be especially true if the art was a means for them to work through some personal issue they have (like traumas or insecurities) or present their viewpoint of the world–or both. And I get it! I do that in my own fics, as well (as do basically all writers, regardless of medium). But art is not sacred. And 'each artist knows themself best, and has the best conception of what social function their art embodies' is not a useful, or even truthful, viewpoint. When artistic purity is enshrined as an unknowable ideal towards which to strive, everyone suffers, and a great richness and nuance is lost in our creation and understanding of art, how it develops, and how its function changes over time.
Suffice to say, art has become collaboration. The artist is no longer in the spotlight, which may sound harsh to some, but to me it means they need not bear the brunt of their 'performance' on their lonesome any longer. They are not to be put on a pedestal, nor to be trampled. Instead, they should invite a few folks from the audience to come up and tell a story with them. After all, they already do, whether they mean to or not.
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The belief that people should “love and respect you for who you are” does not include psychological abnormalities and/or social perversions. Anti-tribalism (i.e. “inclusiveness”) is one thing, but straying from the natural disposition of humanity is a corruption of nature itself—and you can’t expect people to accept that. People feel hurt by this because no one wants to feel undesirable, but it’s mostly when they choose to identify with it (rather than view it as a mere negative trait they have) does it truly upset them. This belief stems from individualism; that there’s nothing wrong with them and that the other person is just wrong, doesn’t understand you, or is just mean.
Listen, it’s not that they’re not accepting you, it’s that they’re not accepting that about you. It only becomes refusing to accept YOU if you choose to identify with it. I make the distinctions between all this because we can change and become a better, stronger, cooler, sweeter, hotter, etc. version of ourselves. No one thinks they’re perfect (or at least, they shouldn’t). That should mean there are things to work on and improve. It is absurd to know that, and then refuse to better yourself—when you can—because you just want things to go your way despite not having become better. It’s like how everyone is trying to find that perfect someone, but no one is trying to be that perfect someone. This is why.
Moreover, most people just try covering up symptoms rather than address the cause. Their version of improving is gaining the ability to more easily indulge in their pre-existing whims rather change who they are such that those very whims may change. That’s why most people don’t ever truly improve themselves and instead just cope (e.g. lie to themselves/self-deceit, engage in pleasure-seeking activities such as vice to feel better in a sensory sense even though nothing actually changes, etc.). They don’t genuinely care about betterment and improvement, they only care about indulgences, whims, and baser wants & desires.
Lastly, I’m not saying there’s never anything wrong with others’ views and that you’re always the problem. The truth is, both perspectives have validity to them, but don’t misapply them just to make yourself feel better. Find the truth and acknowledge it, even if it may mean acknowledging some upsetting realities about yourself, your life, and your situation.
And God Knows best.
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To Myself:
April 16th, 2024
Im so afraid of everything. Im afraid of my career, and whether or not I’ll be able to make it. I’m afraid of being in love, and all of the ways it could end one day. I’m afraid of myself, and how much I’ve improved over the past four years, and how that means that I can no longer use suicidal ideation as a coping mechanism, and now I don’t really know what to replace it with.
And I am so afraid that the more I grow and the older I get, the more I’ll have to be afraid of.
But I am also so incredibly proud of myself. I love everything I’ve accomplished and become the past four years. Every. Single. Fucking. Day. Since February 9, 2020 has been a day with effort. Literally every day. I haven’t skipped one. And it shows. And I know that it doesn’t matter how afraid I am, because I don’t really have a choice but to keep going anyways. I don’t get to just give up. I am too capable, too strong, with too much ahead of me.
My spiritual path has shifted and changed so much. I actually had to rip apart a lot of my identity and rebuild it because when I finally found the truth, I realized how much of my old beliefs were embedded into self identity, and it was so hard to let it go. I still struggle. But I’m learning. And I’ve made such incredible leaps in this path. I have seen and experienced things that made me think I was absolutely crazy, and then realize I *wasn’t* crazy. And it’s the most mind blowing, exciting, emotional and intensely peaceful thing that I never knew could exist.
My goals for my life and my days are always shifting. And there’s so much I can be better on. But the fact that I am still here, always working, means that I will be better.
I’m so thankful for my partner. I’m so thankful for my team lead. I’m so thankful for my babies. God, I’m thankful for Seymour. And, more than anything, I am wildly thankful for me. I am thankful for the little girl that was neglected and abused and made to be a parent before 3rd grade. I’m thankful for the young preteen who experienced her first severe loss and started hurting herself for the first time. I’m thankful for the teen who was chaotic and insecure and kept getting into bad situations and tried to kill herself repeatedly. I’m thankful for the girl who broke two hearts by breaking one, and entered young adulthood wondering why she lived that long.
Every version of me is one that was trying her best with what she knew at the time, even when she made mistakes. And they are the reason that I am still here, and I am who I am now.
I am wildly in love with myself and my life. I have a partner that I don’t have to guess with. Who shows me incredible things and takes care of me. Sees me. Really *sees* me. In this plane, and the next. I am in a career that I never even knew I’d find such a deep passion in. I get so emotional over how much I am in love with it. I have cut off a lot of people recently that I thought had a permanent place in my life, and it put me through the closest thing to a break down I’ve had since 2019, but even through that I knew that I wanted to be alive.
All of this to say, this app has seen so many sides of me the past 10 years. None of which ever wanted to live, nor did they ever think I ever would want to.
But I’m here. And I do. And I am so proud of it.
So, future me, if it all falls apart, and the partner leaves, the career falls flat, and more people exit your life, it will be okay. The common denominator in the good things in your life is not luck like you always thought it was. The common denominator, is simply you. The magic of who you are and how you exist in this world. So don’t abandon yourself again. No matter who else may.
I hope that the you can look back on this version of you, the one writing this, with the same love, understanding, and gratitude. And I hope that I make you proud and make your life easier.
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Tarot Reading
Thursday 8 February 2024
Question:
Can you give me a message from the sun god Ra?
Answer:
Eight of pentacles in reverse
Six of cups in reverse
Clearing
XIII
108
Eight of pentacles in reverse: Self-development, self-improvement, perfectionism, misdirected activity. You are focused on self-improvement and personal development. You are highly disciplined and focused when it comes to understanding your inner beliefs and behaviours, and you are dedicated to becoming the best version of yourself. You may have certain ‘rules’ such as only allowing yourself to think a negative thought for 17 seconds. You are ready and willing to do these things over and over until you see results with your well-being and general happiness. You are focused on creating perfection, but to your detriment. Know that perfection is a myth and surrender to the art of imperfection. You might be keeping yourself busy with small tasks, but struggling to make progress towards your bigger goals. It is time to take a step back and assess whether you are indeed focused on the right things, or if you need to shift your focus to bring your activities back in alignment with your broader goals.
Six of cups in reverse: Living in the past, forgiveness, lacking playfulness. This card asks whether you're clinging to the past and losing touch with the present. When you find yourself wishing for ‘how things used to be’ and not living in the present, you miss out on the opportunities right in front of you. Take the opportunity to make peace with the past so you can focus on the now. Learn from your mistakes, forgive others and yourself, and acknowledge that life is continually evolving. May also be a sign you have lost touch with your inner child and life has become boring, repetitive, and ‘stale’. You are taking on too much of the responsibility and heaviness that come with 'adulting'. Open yourself to a curious mind and to have fun as though you were a child again. If you find yourself saying, “Oh but I don’t have time!” then make time!! Play! Have some time out. Go jump in puddles or build sand castles! Might be taking a private walk down memory lane.
Clearing: Make room for growth!
XIII: He glances one last time at the city inside him: images resurface from his memories. He sees himself as a child holding his mother hand, then as a boy giving his first kiss under the oak, going to work under the weight of his bag, waiting as a lover who takes shelter under a main door, speaking with his friends on the church steps. When he finds the strength to turn round. Everything crumbles; even his face seems to be transfigured. You must change the shape.
108: He bars doors and windows to prevent the messenger from entering. To his wife who begs him to calm down he says: “My son is still alive. If the news about his death doesn’t enter this house, my son is still alive!” Don’t be obsessed. Try something else.
All together meaning:
My own interpretation: improvement and progress over perfection! My understanding of perfection says appearing perfect can be a bad thing. Surrender to imperfection! Create time for playfulness, possess the quality of being light-heartedness be full of fun. I’m built on memories, reshape my perspective of them? Allow the past the crumble to make room for growth. Rather than clinging to the past and how things use to be, try forgiving yourself and others.
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manifest the mindset of “ew, I’m not putting that in my body”
I’m actually so proud of my sober journey and I love it..
Like why do I need to drink alcohol? When I have so much fun as is?
It’s so bad for the liver, causes so much swelling and bloating, can’t drive on it. Terrible hangover the next day + negative ass thoughts.
Something is changing and feels new.
I love my new boobs because it makes my waist so much slimmer too. Like I fucking love long legs and no armpit fat and slimmer arms like this is so fucking cool, making my little girl wishes dreams come true :’) I’m so fking happy.
My standards are so fucking higher now.
How I feel in a relationship - to be chased everyday. To feel loved everyday. To be reminded every single morning that I’m on their mind. To be their dream girl and someone they can’t go a day without.
Let them prove it to me what their feelings are. Let them prove it to me how much I mean to them.
That’s the only way to rule out from the fakes.
The acts of service, being made sure I am safe, asking how my day went, wanting the best for me, making sure my relationship with my parents are good, asking how my parents are, feeling provided for and taken care of for financially, being handed money because they love you.
Packing me food to go to work, surprising me with flowers.
All I need to master is emotional detachment and control over my emotions.
All I need to do is to never act out on any extreme feelings ever ever again. Take yourself really fucking seriously, and everything will follow through. You have gone through night shifts like girl comeon. Saving lives then attending classes. Sleep, of course, but remember to fucking hustle.
Don’t stop chasing your dreams and become the absolute fucking dream woman that my ex’s can never have again. I will never be devalued. I will treat myself with upmost respect and only be around men who make me feel loved, taken care of, protected, kept safe, valued and desired at all times. Considered and thought of, even when I am not there. I do not need to chase anybody, men never have been and never will be the prize. And any man who thinks the opposite is literally not around the same air I breathe.
I am not a man’s trophy, I am a man’s treasure.
I only attract the absolute best.
Being kind, being caring, being sweet, spoiling my loved ones. Never EVER stingy with my loved ones. I have to remember how important it is because of integrity, God is watching, and scores are kept. If not them, ME. MY subconscious keeps score. Do what is right. Don’t do what is not nice or unkind. Always keep your hands clean and always just do it, especially when giving love.
The best woman, the dream woman, is the female best version of him.
She stays positive, she is in a relationship with herself first and always on the pursuit of improvement, self happiness. Only give them a taste. Never waste my energy or my time “convincing” a man, yes explain and show them who you are, yes state what your needs are. Yes let it be clear what your standards are.
But never, ever BEG, or attempt to change their minds. Just state how you feel and what you need. Whatever goes on in their head and whatever choices they make is up to them. The most I can do is show, the most I can do is just be the amazing me. And this will go so far beyond measures.
I wish O the best, and I wish S the best.
Thank you S for tolerating so much of my abandonment issues and loving me despite them. Thank you for being my first love of my life and serious relationship, I forgive you for needing to make your family happy. But I will never forget how you withheld the truth countless times, and looked me in the eyes with both obsession+love and other times, desperation to convince me into the truth of your lies. Thank you for giving me butterflies and
Thank you O for showing me what a possessive, jealous man be like. It was a really fun ride. But also thank you for showing me how insecure you really were, yet it was so bittersweet. You wore your heart on your sleeve and truly gave me the most you could despite your P addiction and poor lifestyle. You were always in trouble with something I could tell there were careless mistakes made; you were actually a mirror of some shit I was going through too. Thank you for mirroring my toxic statements and actions because it showed me how hurtful it was. And it makes me reflect upon S for how many times I said such vicious, cold words.
The side of me when she is filled with rage is so unpredictable, a rage that fills my bones and cannot be tamed. It’s another world. The swollen eyes in the morning and sunken feeling in the bottomest pit of my heart, the tragedy and the despair like there will not another tomorrow. Feeling the world shattering into pieces and consumed by the dread to not exist, the mind coping by thinking of suicide. It’s fucking scary.
There’s still so much more work to do.
- never bite the hand that feeds you;
- trust is earned and can take one careless, poor mistake to break and a lot of time to repair.
- never hurt your reputation or dignity or self respect for a chomp of change or 24 hours of pleasure. stand on your principles, have fun, but at least keep it fucking on the low and do not be sharing the details, or is no one else’s business. always remember that actions have consequences.
- there is no more room for carelessness. Get serious about your discipline, get serious about your future. Get serious about your mental, physical, spiritual and emotional well-being and do not let anybody stray you from your path. You’re on a mission until the grave or until you become pregnant and raise your healthy, beautiful and unconditionally loved children.
- no man would ever stop you from doing what is absolutely the best for you. they support you through everything and push you to the finish line.
- a thoughtful man who genuinely cares about you is gentle even when he is angry. He will not dare hurt you;
Let the red flags reveal itself.
His character really showed me who he was when he devalued me, “never cared, never will 😘” exactly you ain’t my bf so why do you care, and still responding, wanting to convince him, GIRL PUT THAT PHONE DOWN AND LIVE YOUR LIFE. I should’ve never lost face and just given him the absolute silent treatment. He could’ve gone nuts just wondering how the fuck I moved if I had just gone silent after he said those vicious words.
Master detachment. Don’t even let it hurt me. You need to imagine a shield, a porcupine. A shiny porcupine where all those things are simply others bullshit. I will not absorb it, I refuse to fuse or lose myself. I am never in too deep or attached to the expectations or the outcomes.
Unkind words are just a dealbreaker for me.
Then he accused me of having taken his watch. When someone accuses me of stealing from them.. that really hurts me as well. How come? I would only ADD value, love and pour love into my loved ones. I would never harm my loved ones like that. Because I would NEVER, EVER take something from someone in deliberate intention of making them lose something valuable to them. I would never ever ever until my grave take something from someone without them knowing. I would never backstab or throw someone under the bus like that. And despite my character, my sweet and caring and thoughtful self.. maybe also because I have stolen before. From a stranger once or twice like a hoe with a trick. Or from corporation. I have stolen before and know exactly right from wrong of stealing. So for someone I have once loved to have accused me of it is absolutely BETRAYAL.
R- I genuinely thought he knew. He was just protecting his own disappointment onto me. And the way he handled the conflict just shows the kind of relationships he has in his own life.
Conflict is a very, very tender and touchy subject.
Time for me to dive deeper into it and learn more. Time for me to explore and learn more. Time to take deep breaths, choose your words carefully, practice mindfulness. I will never forget how calm I was at Denise’s just chilling, and letting him reveal his own character to me.
Trying to make me jealous with how he has girls all around him… I think that’s just true insecurity to make sure he has his supply around because he KNOWS that a beautiful woman will always be highly desired. He just wanted to be reminded that he was my priority.
Me telling him was me trying to establish “trust” LMAO. It was honestly stupid and careless as FUCK. I forgive myself though because I just didn’t know how to play my next move. I didn’t know it would upset him, because he used other girls, so I’m like ok I’ll use other guys as a weapon. It was my first time ): and I had to up the score 😈
As long as he knows that I can play the game better, and next time I just don’t have to open my mouth or show any interest or any action to actually follow through. Just let them know that they’re around.
That’s another dealbreaker… to try and use other women to power trip me or make me jealous. LOL go!! Idgaf. I can value you, appreciate you, prioritize you, but if you enjoy the attention of other women instead of only mine, or if you’re trying to show that you’re desired by other women and make me jealous, you are insanely misinformed. I should just play along. Like lol did you enjoy it? Did you get her number? OR I should immediately cut them off and share a story about how there’s a creep in my building who is always trying to talk to me in the gym, in the elevator.
Or just make up some story in the coffee shop. Give them exsctly wtf they be Trynna give you. Show them you will not be played. No just kidding it’s more powerful to give looks that can KILL. 🔪 don’t even waste my breath. Just look at them in distaste.
Men speak to vulnerability. Be real and be raw with your emotions, my love. You’re doing amazing and I’m so proud of you. The little me would be in awe of how successful and pretty and confident I am now.
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Unlocking Wisdom: Why You Should Read Philosophy ?
Nowadays, many people turn to personal development books to enhance themselves, promote personal growth, and strive to become the best versions of themselves. However, for me, this transformative role is occupied by philosophy. While personal development books serve as a gateway to self-knowledge for others, philosophy is my path to self-discovery.
My first encounter with philosophy occurred during middle school, marking a significant turning point in my life. It was a treasure I stumbled upon, a piece that changed my life trajectory from one of confusion and aimlessness to a person with a defined set of thoughts, ideas, and a unique life perspective. Philosophy rescued me from the labyrinth of my own mind.
It’s important to note that philosophy doesn’t provide ready-made answers to life’s questions and dilemmas. Instead, it equips you with the necessary tools to navigate these challenges. Philosophy encourages introspection and the quest for answers within yourself. Whether you discover those answers or not, what remains certain is that you embark on a journey of self-exploration and a deeper understanding of the world — an odyssey of self-discovery and exploration.
Philosophy is, at its core, a pursuit of meaning. It presents an extensive encyclopedia of ideas, enabling you to explore and seek your own sense of purpose and meaning in life. Rather than dictating what you must do to achieve your goals, philosophy encourages you to contemplate what you can do to attain them. It doesn’t hand you a purpose; it provides the pathway to finding your purpose.
By compelling you to think, explore all possibilities, delve into various doctrines, and engage with the thoughts of countless philosophers, philosophy cultivates critical thinking. It transforms you from a passive consumer of knowledge to an active thinker who not only analyzes existing knowledge but creates their own. This fosters the development of rational and critical judgment.
Furthermore, philosophy serves as your gateway to morality. If you find yourself grappling with your beliefs and harboring doubts, philosophy offers rational and logical tools to navigate these struggles. It broadens your mind to consider an array of beliefs and perspectives, fostering a more open and inclusive mindset.
It’s essential to clarify that I’m not here to pass judgment on personal development books. If these books have been a source of knowledge and growth for you, I commend your dedication to self-improvement. Instead, I am sharing my personal journey with what I hold closest to my heart and what has immensely aided my growth — philosophy. My intention is to encourage people to explore the world of philosophy and its profound thinkers, as it offers a remarkable opportunity to discover purpose and meaning in life.
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you had a question a few asks down where you said it indicated enneagram 3 and it made me wonder:
1. know that striving to be like someone or model yourself after someone you admire can indicate 3 but what if you admire them BECAUSE you relate to them on a basic level, but they are like a more ideal version of you? like “i relate to this character so much this could be me with some minor character development” so then you try to achieve that development to become a better version of yourself rather than “they’re ideal i wanna be like this at all costs even if it means losing myself” (which would never even be a consideration for you because you want to be a better version of YOU specifically above all)? but even then you start questioning “well is this character REALLY so similar to me, just a better version, or do i just WANT them to be because i like them?” like questioning if you’re really as self aware as you think or if you’re fooling yourself basically
2. on a different but related note what if you always start questioning your type when you find a character you relate to but their typology is different than what you’ve deduced for yourself (either you relate to them a lot as is, or it’s like i said above, you relate to them a lot but they’re like an improved version of you)? which then presents a problem because what if there are multiple characters you find like that all with different typologies? so then you try to mush them all together and find the pieces that may be you/not you (along the lines of “this one is an isfp 9w8, and this one is an enfp 6w7, this one is an infp 4w3. i know i’m an introvert so maybe im an ixfp with 6 and 9 and 4 in my tritype”). or maybe even try to find commonalities (all the characters use fi, or many of them are 6’s) but you’re still perpetually second guessing it all the time? because again what if you aren’t even actually this way and just see yourself this way but it’s a lie and you’re fooling yourself? and even if it’s true and you are that way it’s still so complicated?
3. what types & enneagrams are generally more inclined to become obsessive about typology & enneagram & even astrology as a means of figuring out their personality and ultimately becoming the best versions of themselves, but in an anxious way like i NEED to figure this out so i can start applying it and bettering myself and my life, IN REAL LIFE, asap. but yet always fall short on actually finding the answers? so it’s just like an endless obsession with maybe frequent breaks where you’re like “i give up! i’m just going to live my life and come back to this later!” out of frustration?
To be honest, all of this sounds very Bermuda / triple attachment / 369. Like you are attaching to something with all three fixes, idealizing it and seeing it as a goal to achieve (3), but then second-guessing and doubting and questioning how self-aware you are (6 with a 9 fix).
1. Relating to characters isn’t always 3, but if you set them on a pedestal and use them as a version of “future/better me” to emulate, that can be 3. 3s are always looking for their ideal self and wanting to live up to that; they are here on this earth to become a better version of themselves. A 4 fix wouldn’t think this way (nothing is me, I have to bring “me” from inside myself by rejecting everything outside me), and a 2 fix wouldn’t think this way (what matters the most is being helpful to other people); it’s the 3 fixer who focuses on embodying admirable traits.
2. This sounds like 6-9. Settling on a character, looking for someone to relate to (“attachment”) as a way to make up your mind about your type, then being confused that none of them are consistent, wondering why you relate, and bringing on inner confusion (the inner confusion, inner swirl, lack of a sense of firm identity is coming from the 9), and then using 6 to analyze it, second-guess yourself by relating to them, instead of pulling from “me” / using “me” as a source. This is a lot of heady energy (what if I am lying to myself, and not who I think I am, or what if it’s true, and how can I find myself if I can’t even relate consistently to characters of my own type?). I might even think 6 core at this point, with a 9-3 fix.
3. I think attachment types, because it’s all about pinpointing “me” from the outside through an impersonal system. Like, this system (astrology, typology, psychology, etc) is going to finally tell me who I am, and then I will know, as opposed to bringing “me” to the table. Here again, we see the Bermuda (nickname for the 369) swirling around. I have to be my best self (3), and how I do that is by locating who I am through an external logical system (6), yet I can’t sit with the answer more than five minutes before I jump up and second-guess it, or re-analyze it (9 haze, causing 6 never to settle and ‘be sure’ since there’s no sturdy gut fix to steady it).
For what it’s worth, I as a 6 have gotten angry and ‘given up’ on many things I couldn’t understand, but I can never just walk away from them for good, because I refuse to be defeated by something or admit I can’t figure it out, and can’t just forget about whatever is on my mind. That is the curse of being a 6 – whatever is ‘happening’ is all you can think about, and that includes trying to figure out your MBTI or Enneagram type.
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ADVICE TO MY FUTURE SELF AS A PERSON AND AS AN OT
I don’t recognize the person staring back at me in the mirror. The little girl I once knew to be so outgoing and full of life seems long gone. In her place is a stranger who has yet to discover herself and her purpose in life. This letter is for her from her future self. To read when she is lost, confused, or struggling to find herself and her ambitions.
Dear future self,
If you are reading this, it means you are going through a difficult period in your life and need little reassurance and some guidance. Well, you’ve come to the right place. I am your future self, and therefore, am the most optimistic version of you as I have been through every single thing that you have gone through, and guess what? I’m still here. You’re still here. That in itself is a huge accomplishment and deserves to be treated like one.
This a reminder to you that life is not easy. There will always be hardships and obstacles to overcome, and at the time, it may seem like the hardest thing in the world. I am here to tell you that it is not. When you look back, you will see how minuscule these obstacles were in the grand scheme of life. The hardships are just the stepping stones that bring us closer to our life goals and ambitions.
At times, life gets busy, and we forget to take time to care for ourselves and grow into the person we want to be. So, I would like to give a few tips that I know would help. In the extensive time I have shared with you, I know what works and what doesn’t. Here are some reminders of what helps you to keep going:
Spending time with loved ones. Family is something you value and is pretty important to you. Life tends to pass everyone by and before you know it, people have full-time jobs, families to care for, and opportunities that take them across the world. This is why its necessary to make time for family, cherish the moments you share and find a way to interact to make the most of it while you can.
Taking more time and effort into your health. Our health is something we take for granted and only try to make changes when something goes wrong. It is especially difficult to find time to exercise when work and school take over most of our time. Making time to do so will have many pros some of which include improving your overall health and enhancing one’s mood which consequently improves your mental health.
Taking time for yourself. It is good to prioritize work and the things that we do on a daily basis as we all have responsibilities to uphold. Finding time to help others is great but it is important to not neglect ourselves and our own needs. Having days where you sleep in, going for a spa day or even finding a new hobby are all small additions that you can add into your life which will have a massive impact on improving your mental well-being.
A special message to the OT inside of you; never assume that you have reached your learning capacity. There are always new and improved methods and discoveries in this advancing world of ours, so it is important to never limit yourself from the opportunities out there. Being open to learning new things, working with others, and facing challenges is what makes you a good OT. Always remain confident in your abilities and trust your instincts. Accept challenges with an open mind and heart and you will be sure to succeed.
I hope this was helpful and gives you the push you needed. My only wish is for you to become the best version of yourself. In the meantime, be true to yourself and take care.
Yours truly,
Your future self.
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Why Holding On To Past Relationships Is The Worst Thing You Can Do For Yourself, Period
by Daniel Dowling via MindBodyGreen
Three years ago I was a 24-year-old failure-to-launch who lived on his mom’s couch and shared a bathroom with two teenage sisters. My friends had their own houses, degrees, and independence. And there I was, broke and depressed, totally reliant on my parents. It hadn't ever not been that way.
But in 2014 I made one small decision, which led to results I still sometimes can’t believe.
Today, I’m leading writers in a national campaign to rebrand my hometown, and I write for the best entrepreneurial and self-improvement sites in the world (mbg being my favorite; no lie). I make a great living coaching others to become the happiest and most successful versions of themselves. That’s a lot of change in just three years, from any perspective. And I can trace the transformation of my life back to one single thing: letting go of my exes—completely.
Breaking free from serial monogamy.
For most of my adult life I’d been a serial monogamist. I thought I just really loved love, but it turns out I was just really, really afraid of responsibility. So, for my personal dissatisfaction and unhappiness, self-improvement wasn’t the cure—it was a new girlfriend! And when that one didn’t work out, I'd find another. Yay for love!
Except it wasn’t love because I wasn’t becoming the best version of myself through these relationships. So after the last one ended ignominiously, I quit the love game—just not quite all the way.
I still kept in contact with my exes. And Jen—my former fiancee—was a particular crutch. We still visited each other even though we lived in different states. We kept in regular contact through texts and phone calls, especially during crises. I was still depending on her to make me happy.
Every time we talked, I renewed the connection to my former ways of thinking and behaving. It strengthened the conviction that, deep down, I could only be happy with Jen. She was my way out. If things got too tough, I could always come to her, and she could come to me. We even promised that if we weren’t married by 30, we’d get hitched. Talk about a safety net… (and, yes, also the plot of My Best Friend's Wedding).
Unfortunately, that safety net was keeping me from being the bold, successful, independent man I wanted to become. I just couldn’t seem to cut the cord on my own.
Flying without a net.
Then one day I was listening to an audio course from my favorite self-improvement mentor, Zig Ziglar. He was talking about how to right our wrongs and forgive ourselves. He advised writing apologies down and sending them to the appropriate people. But he had a special step for exes.
"When it comes to the forgiveness you want from your exes [Zig has a drawling Southern accent], I want you to follow all the steps I just gave you. But instead of sending off the letter, I want you to fold it up, light a fire, and burn the damn thing. Cuz there’s no point in renewing emotional connections with people who aren’t good for you. That’s why they're your exes! It’s time to move on from them and fully embrace your own life."
When one is slapped by truth, one’s jaw has a tendency of dropping, and the eyes have a tendency to glaze over, lost in a thousand-yard stare. That was the picture of my face. Might’ve even drooled a little.
I thought about Jen, and Em, and Katie. I thought about how important they’d been for me and how much security they’d brought me. And I knew I had to let them go for good. For good.
No more texts or calls. No more being Facebook friends. No email updates. No nothing.
I had anxiety about the decision, naturally—severing ties with my past and obliterating a huge comfort zone. But I had a future to step into. I had to do that on my own.
Dealing with the emptiness.
I missed my former girlfriends like crazy. But instead of feeling sorry for myself and longing for them, I prayed for them. I asked God for the same things I was asking for my own self-improvement journey—courage, faith, hope, positivity, inspiration, grace, and so on. I prayed for them to meet amazing and inspiring friends who could help them become their best selves. I prayed for my future wife. And I prayed that I would become the fully independent man capable of supporting her.
In all this praying, I completely changed my focus. Instead of relying on my girlfriends for faith and reassurance, I relied on God and my own ability to handle my problems. I took back the misplaced faith in my girlfriends and put it squarely in my own hands.
That’s when I finally launched.
Do you believe in life after love?
Just like Cher, I found my power only after letting go of my past relationships.
Without my exes as safety nets, it was just me. Nobody else was going to make me happy. So I did what I needed to do to make me successful—all the writing, studying, practicing, pitching, researching, and self-improvement. I actually become part of a community and made new friends. I fully embraced my own damn life.
Three months passed and I still missed my exes. But I was making money through my writing and making new connections.
Six months passed and I still missed my exes. But I’d started earning a full-time living through my writing. And I was growing more confident by the day, especially in my community.
A year passed and I still missed my exes. But I was fully independent through my passion. And I’d outgrown the anxiety and depression that had haunted me since I was a teenager—a by-product of my newfound faith in me.
It’s been three full years since I cut out my exes. I’m 100 percent over each one, but I’m human—I still miss them! Who wouldn’t? They were brilliant and beautiful women who were insanely fun to be with. I made thousands of joyful memories with each one.
Sometimes I’m reminded of them by hearing a certain song or watching a movie. But that’s just another opportunity for me to thank God for them and to pray for them. It’s another opportunity for me to be the independent and faithful man I know I can be for myself, for my wife, for my clients, and for my audience. It’s another opportunity to find security in myself and in a higher power. And through these opportunities, I’ve found the happiness and fulfillment I always wanted.
I advise all of my clients to go on a yearlong relationship fast, which most of them do. But the real growth comes when they fully let go of their exes and stop using them as crutches. It’s hard, hard, hard to do but absolutely essential if you want to grow.
Here are five tips to help you let go of your exes for good:
1. Start a self-improvement routine, complete with daily, weekly, and monthly goal setting.
Read this article as a primer.
2. Meet with someone weekly to discuss your personal growth and your journey.
This person will help keep you accountable to your goals and lifestyle choices. Can be a friend or an amazing coach.
3. Stay single for a year—totally single.
If you can’t be happy with you, you won’t be happy—truly happy—with anyone else. Love that you! Commit to being successfully single for a year. That means happy, connected in your community, fulfilled in your work, and in a state of continuous personal growth. (Your daily routines and long-term goals will be critical to this step.)
4. Surround yourself with positive, uplifting people.
Join a faith community where people strive to live out the values you identify with. This is where you’ll find the deep connections that you can grow with—and that will prevent you from leaning on your exes as crutches.
5. Pray or meditate often.
Use your emotions as mindfulness cues. When you miss someone, pray for them. When you’re lonely, pray for the courage, positivity, and fortitude to make good decisions. When you think you can’t go on—that happens to everyone—pray for what you need. This will help you grow faith in a higher power and yourself, which is an absolute must if you want to be happy alone.
And being happy alone? That’s an absolute must for loving someone unconditionally in a relationship that can last a lifetime.
Link to article on Mind Body Green
Author: Daniel Dowling
#Daniel Dowling#mindbodygreen#article#relationship#love#breakup#heartbreak#moving on#strength#recovery#healing#self respect#personal development#quotes
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character studies; haikyuu boys
requested by anon(s); character studies for haikyuu boys that had been requested for my 1k Event around a month back! sorry for making you bbys wait so long :(
characters; hoshiumi kōrai, kuroo tetsurō, kageyama tobio, daishō suguru, daichi sawamura, asahi azumane, miya atsumu, kita shinsuke, iwaizumi hajime
synopsis;
the character’s general personality
the character’s general motivation
the character’s motivation towards you
the character’s love language
the character’s preferred dates
what kissing the character feels like
what being with the character feels like
genre; fluff
warnings; just some curse words!
notes; if you’re interested in other characters, check out my masterlist! :) if you requested for a jujutsu kaisen character and i haven’t written for them yet, don’t worry, i will!
HOSHIUMI KŌRAI
hoshiumi’s general personality; there isn’t enough of this cutie honestly :( but honestly, the more i read of his personality and see of him in manga panels, the more i love him. i hope i can put this in words: hoshiumi is scarily skilled, in the sense that when you watch him, you’re not intimidated by him, but rather, in awe. you can visibly see all the effort he’d put into honing his skills whenever you watch him play. especially because he’s so quiet and concentrated during games, making him a completely different person on court. as a person, i see him as being extremely reliable and having a really strong, but quiet presence. so that when you’re around him, he doesn’t have to speak to let himself be known, you know? also! i remember him being really offended when an interviewer commented about how good of a player he is despite his height, and i honestly understand it. no matter what he does, he’s constantly being reduced to just his height, and how that influences everything, but there’s so much more to him than that. of course, his reasoning behind joining volleyball and becoming one of the best in japan is a little silly, but he is driven in general, and very determined. but i also don’t think he’s smug or overly confident or arrogant about his skills, even if he should because of the ladder he’d had to climb to get to where he is. he’s confident, of course, but he’s not annoyingly so. he won’t rub it in anyone’s face, because he has peace with it, in a way? like he himself is aware of it, so there’s no need to get that constant validation from others. like i said, him on court and him off court are two different people: so yes, he does love being showered in appreciation and attention, but for him, not for his volleyball self. he knows he’s good at volleyball, but appreciate him for more than that, for more than being so good despite being short; appreciate him for being caring, for being diligent and hard-working, for being a constant, reassuring and uplifting presence in everyone’s life. as i mention in the motivation section, i think hoshiumi is a very curious individual, in the sense that he’s always looking for adventure, always looking for something to catch his eye, snatch away his attention, to leave him in awe, to leave him breathless and exhilarated. i don’t think he’s an adrenaline junkie, after having said that, but i do think he’s in love with spontaneity.
motivation; i think hoshiumi’s motivation is very simple, and it’s to better himself. to not have his inspiration and drive rely solely on to be a better version of his brother, to be better than his brother in general, but rather improve so that he can hone his own skills, so he can wow everyone around him, to be given the title of best spiker without a single comment on his height, to the best, regardless. to be the best just because he is the best. towards you, it would probably be his curiosity. like i mentioned above, i see him as really curious, so he watches you from afar, observes you, wondering how much more there is to you, wanting to learn more about you. he wants to learn of your interests and hobbies, whether they align with his or not, whether he can give you all you want or not.
hoshiumi’s love language; physical touch and acts of service. despite what i initially thought, i don’t think he’d be too into pda. he won’t mind kissing you in front of others, of course, because there is a little part of him that’s incredibly smug about being your partner. but then again, he prefers things like holding onto your hand, or linking your pinkies together, or piggy back rides. he loves to constantly be helping you somehow, and also consecutively feed into his ego a lil, so he’ll constantly be carrying your things for you, helping you cook by cutting up vegetables, or handing you ingredients, or helping you renovate your room at three in the morning. he really likes the little things that build up to shape domesticity between the two of you, but loudly, you know? as in the love he has for you is well-known: he’ll proudly wear your scrunchie on his wrist, or let you do a little make up on him and walk around with it. he’d tattoo your name on his forehead if he could.
hoshiumi’s preferred dates; the beach, hiking, theme parks, staying in and playing physically active games like twister, fast food drive throughs
kissing hoshiumi; really playful, and a little giggly too. it’s not silly kissing, it’s serene, but it leaves you feeling all bubbly in the way he wraps his arms around your neck and pushes you to him like you’re the only one that matters in this world
what being with hoshiumi feels like; baking with someone and making a mess with the ingredients, but you can’t stop laughing
KUROO TETSURŌ
kuroo’s general personality; oh boy here we go. okay so we all know provocative, smug, cheeky kuroo, yeah? and i firmly believe that yes, that really a part of his personality. there is a part of him that really is like that. a person’s personality is never black and white, and that’s exactly the case with kuroo: there’s a lot to him. it’s not just that at first glance he seems intimidating and scarily attractive, he is. but i think there’s a reason for that, and in a way, it’s a coping mechanism. kuroo is, deep down, a huge dork, and a really big nerd. but like i said, there’s nothing wrong with being both that and a little bit of an asshole sometimes. it’s just that i think there’s a reason that other part of his personality developed, and it’s a way to protect himself, you know? i’m pretty sure it’s canon that kuroo’s parents didn’t entirely get along, and it’s really easy to feel alone in situations like that, so that really suave and attractive and charming part of him developed so that he can attract people to him, so that he can have this pulling effect on others. it makes you want to spend time with him, lose yourself to the hours with him. that doesn’t mean kuroo tries to hold back his nerdy side, or that he’s ashamed of his funnier, dorkier side. if anything, i think he’s pretty confident in both sides of him. because just as that ‘cool’ side of him is dazzling, the louder, cheekier side of him is pretty charming too. on a completely separate note, i think kuroo cares, oh he cares so much. his heart is too big, if i’m being honest. he wants his friends to succeed, wants to see them be their best, is always pushing them to be better. he means it, he really does. he won’t say it out loud, but if you need him, he’s staying up extra hours for you, getting you your favorite snacks, being extra touchy on a day he notices you’re upset. he’s very aware of everyone’s emotions around him, and that might be because of his parents too, in which he’s become really hyper aware of any telltale signs, you know? all that being said, pair him with bokuto and he’s a crackhead
motivation; i honestly think kuroo always puts people above himself. i can’t explain why, but i just know that he does. make sure my friends are okay, then i’ll check on myself. push my friends to do better, and then work on motivating myself. watch my friends succeed before i look at how far i’ve come. being so proud of his friends, before he realizes how proud he is of himself too. so, in turn, his motivation would be the people around him. he thrives on communication and socializing and having strong, close connections and relationships with people. that is his main motivation. in regards to you, it’s a little different. i mentioned in one of my headcanons for him that he’s really suave and cool around everyone except his crush, and i stand by that, honestly. the only way to rid himself of that nervousness and endless amount of butterflies in his stomach would be to confess to you, removing that weight off of him. also you’re like, really pretty lol
kuroo’s love language; very touchy, very, very touchy, so it’s definitely physical affection and physical touch, with possibly acts of service. acts of service in that he notices when you stay up late to help him practice, or his own willingness to stay with you as you power through an all-nighter, or just silently knowing right away what either of you need without having to speak. he loves, loves, loves pda. he will make out with you in public, he doesn’t care, nothing can stop him. likes to have his arm around you constantly, or does that stupid thing where he puts his hand in your back pocket, or approaching you from behind and and hugging you and kissing all over your neck even if you’re in the middle of a conversation with someone
kuroo’s preferred dates; literally anything they’re all fun with him. fancy dinners or diner visits, movie dates at the cinema or at home, arcade visits, walks at the park, the beach
kissing kuroo; oh it’s breathtaking. it’s always really passionate, and always has you gripping at his shirt at the way he forces your heart into your throat, or the way he has your stomach flipping at the small gasps he lets out when he kisses you open mouthed, which happens more often than not
what being with kuroo feels like; like hugging someone you haven’t seen in years, where your arms are thrown around them tightly and they hold you to them and your heart is about to burst from your chest
KAGEYAMA TOBIO
kageyama’s general personality; the most misunderstood character :( he is not just an angry boy >:( he is just really, really passionate, especially about volleyball, and he wants other people to try and share that passion with him. he’s just really bad at expressing his feelings, and communicating with other people. like all it is is that kageyama loves volleyball, and he takes it very seriously, and when other people don’t, he takes slight offense to that, because in his eyes it just seems after they’re discarding or mocking the sport. that annoyance translates wrong into anger, but the place it originates from really is just pure. have you seen how happy volleyball makes him? he’s not a bad person, not by a long shot. and his character development too! it wasn’t that he wasn’t willing to communicate, it was that people weren’t willing to try with him. they took him for what he seemed like, not what he truly is. when he joined karasuno, they allowed him space to properly express himself, and they introduced him to what became a family to him. he learned to trust, learned to communicate. he’s not a bad person!! he’s just!!! a kid!!! he learns, slowly but surely, and he changes, for the better. okay but, completely different thing to mention. kageyama’s good at volleyball. no, he’s good. and he knows he is. he’s not really smug about it, but it’s not like his confidence is misplaced. he’s just aware of his skills, but he’s also aware of his flaws, and as he grows as a person, he’s more willing to take a step back and look and observe himself, to better himself as a player. i also think kags is insanely determined. like that episode where he studied his ass off just so he could pass and barely made it to the tokyo training camp? how does that directly translate into determination? he really is willing to put his all and more to improve, to play, to the best.
motivation; like i mentioned above, it’s definitely to become improve himself. it’s not that he’s never satisfied with how he is or his skills, it’s more that he’s sure there’s still more space for him to better himself, that this isn’t all that he’s capable of and that he can do better, that he can be better. like i said, it’s not that he puts himself down about not being enough, on the contrary; he believes that he’s one of the best, but that’s not his limit, there’s more to him, there’s more for him to explore. towards you is a little bit trickier, honestly. he honestly wouldn’t even know he has a crush on you until one of his upperclassmen noticed his reactions towards you, and they confront him about him to which he responds ‘oh, so that’s what that is?’ like he really is so clueless. i don’t think he’d have a full on motivation with you, he just wants to be around you, because he finds that he kind of does enjoy the feeling he experiences when he’s around you. it’s really as simple as that
kageyama’s love language; acts of service, absolutely, and, privately, physical touch. it’s not that he won’t hold your hand if you slip it in his, or he won’t return your kiss if you do kiss him in public, but it’s more of you’re the one that usually initiates these things. but! that does not mean kageyama isn’t touchy. he really is, a hundred and ten percent, touch starved. look at him! please! he is craving your touch almost always, he just doesn’t like initiating it in public, and occasionally he’ll take the initiative at home. but please, hug him, hold him, cuddle him, grasp his hand for hours, kiss all over his face. he absolutely adores it. and he shows his love better, takes initiative of it more, when it comes to giving. one of my headcanons for him i mentioned that whenever he gets milk from the vending machine, he gets you your favorite snack too, just because in his head he’s like ‘oh, they’d like that.’ it’s things like that with kags.
kageyama’s preferred dates; don’t do anything involving competitiveness he will go crazy. but things like carnival dates, or diner visits, or ice skating, or stargazing
kissing kageyama; really soft and sweet. it’s very timid and careful and cautious, but he always kisses you fully on the lips, his eyes fluttering shit, his hand coming to rest at the base of your throat, slightly on your chest
what being with kageyama feels like; falling asleep on the beach, sunburnt, with sand and salt on your skin, your body warm but the breeze cool
DAISHŌ SUGURU
daishō’s general personality; i feel like all the haikyuu boys have so much more to them than what seems as a front. like our introduction to suguru was him being this snake-like, manipulative character. i mean nearly all his and his teammates tactics against nekoma were related to manipulation. but why is he inclined to that trait? i don’t know much about canon him, but i like to think that he was kind of in the shadow when he was younger, and the only way he could’ve gotten people to listen or pay attention to him was being this unlikeable and intimidating character. but canon-wise, i think just as his manipulativeness is his strength, it’s also his weakness, and i also think he’s really aware of that, and he knows this tactic has its faults. i also don’t think he’s insanely determined, because yeah he was upset after the match with nekoma, but it wasn’t earth-shattering. from what i’ve seen with his interactions with mika, though, i think he’s very loving, deep down, and very subtly. he doesn’t show it outwardly, but you can see the way he looks at her, the way he gets so proud whenever she remembers something about volleyball. i don’t think he’s a bad person, per se, because at the end of the day, this is also seventeen, eighteen year old suguru, and there’s so much space for him to grow out of this. i think it’s more that he’s the type of person to prefer the easy way out, so he relies on things like getting on the referee’s good side. it could also be that he’s aware of his downfalls so he wants to have anything to his and his team’s advantage, you know? it’s not to say he doesn’t put in effort, because i still think he does, or even that he’s lazy, but it’s more that he wants something and he has a way of getting it that’s faster for him, you know? like i said, i don’t think he’s a bad person, at all. everybody has their flaws, and i think all the haikyuu boys have their own, it’s just that suguru’s is more explicit.
motivation; so like i mentioned how he likes the easy way out, i think suguru’s motivation would be to have high achievements. he seems like an insatiable person, one that always wants more, and more, and more, so he’s always climbing up higher. but also, even though he’s insatiable, he kinda? gives up easily? or not that he gives up easily, it’s more that he’s okay with a loss, or that he accepts defeat relatively easy with a shrug, as in “there’ll be more opportunities, it’s not the end of the world.” towards you, suguru would probably want to have you as his s/o to prove to himself, or to prove to others, that’s capable or worthy of someone like you. it’s kind of sad in a way, because in his head you’re way out of his league, but he makes it seem as a front that you’re just barely worthy of him when he asks you out, simply as a defense mechanism.
daishō love language; subtle acts of affection, 100%. you could see how happy he was to explain to mika all about volleyball, and how happy he was to know that she had been listening and actually putting in an effort to understand the sport that he likes. it’s things like that that really, really matter to him. listening intently when the other speaks of something they’re passionate about, remembering tiny details, like their favorite drink, or their go-to order at a restaurant, or something they’d mentioned in passing that they really wanted, or the way they prefer to sleep at night. that’s the way he expresses his love, definitely.
daishō’s preferred dates; visiting movie theaters, staying in, late night strolls on the beach, clubs/parties
kissing daishō; really, really slow and lazy, kinda lewd as well, in that it’s shameless, and loud
what being with daishō feels like; the feeling when you predict a plot twist in a movie or show correctly
DAICHI SAWAMURA
daichi’s general personality; dad. what a dad. such a Dad. dadchi sawamura. i think it’s very obvious that he’s a very mature character, and he easily fits in the role of a leader. i think him being captain is perfect, because he leads the team perfectly, and he knows all his teammates really well, and is able to respond to each of them correctly, knows how to motivate them perfectly. in that way, he’s a very, very reliable person. he’s someone you can lean on constantly, whenever, wherever. someone you can turn to knowing that your best interests are in their mind when he reaches out to give you advice. he’s someone that will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. he’s also not the type of person that considers the role of a leader and captain as a burden, not someone that thinks it’s a really big responsibility which he wishes can be taken off his shoulders from time to time. no, he appreciates the role, and takes it with all of its heavy weight. he’s really independent and mature in that sense. it’s not to say that he’s very stable constantly, because everyone has their moments, and although he really is unbothered by the responsibility, i think he constantly overthinks his decisions. maybe not so often, but it happens, because every decision he’s ever taken has impacted all of his teammates consecutively, you know? he has to think big, consider the big picture. but yeah, daichi is a very reliable and mature person. will it get annoying and will it have you begging him to loosen up every once in a while? maybe, but is he also very childish at times? yes. make sure to get it on camera though
motivation; much like kuroo, the fact that they’re both captains aside, he does everything for other people. it’s different though because kuroo puts other people above himself, but daichi thinks for everyone including himself. the only one with braincells. he thinks broadly, and considers all consequences for both himself, and for others. his motivation would probably be to see himself and everyone succeed and be their best, to see their efforts put into work, to be able to be incredibly proud of everything they’ve achieved. he really is such a dad. towards you, however, it’s a lot sweeter, and it’d be something like his infatuation with you. he’d want to be the reason for your happiness, wants to be yours, wants you to be all his. kinda possessive but like, in a sweet way.
daichi’s love language; confessions and domestic acts. daichi is unafraid to let you know he loves you, regardless of who’s around, or where you two are. he’s super okay with wrapping his ams around you randomly and just pressing a kiss to your temple and going “i love you.” he doesn’t know why he does it so often, maybe every time he says it, it reassures him. domestic acts in how he’s so comfortable waking up next to you, or how when you sleep over at his house you still get up and make breakfast, or how even folding laundry together is fun. he finds huge comfort in being able to appreciate the most mundane things, like doing the dishes or cleaning around the house, can feel so serene and loving with you.
daichi’s preferred dates; fancy dinners, mini golf, theme parks, road trips, driving up mountains
kissing daichi; weirdly, it’s not soft as you’d expect, more rough and possessive. he always kisses you like someone is watching and he wants to show you off, to prove that you’re all his.
what being with daichi feels like; listening to a love song and feeling nostalgic, even if you’ve never been in love
ASAHI AZUMANE
asahi’s general personality; oh i love this big teddy bear <3 that’s literally what he is. i absolutely adore the fact that he’s really intimidating physically, but his personality is the farthest thing from it; in fact, it’s the complete opposite. i have something important to include though!! in the same way asahi’s very fragile, especially his esteem, and the same way he guilts himself entirely and places the blame on himself whenever something goes wrong, he’s also very easily, and very steadily uplifted (as in, a win is a win, it’s sure and certain and it’s grounding), very easy to accept wins for everyone, not just take all the credit. when he spikes a ball and they score a point, it’s not a win for him, it’s a win for the entire team. that easily translates to asahi being a very giving and thoughtful person. he has a heart too big for him, and yes he’s an over-thinker, but that just means he’s mindful of others, very cautious and careful. although i think if you approach him with an issue, like you’re straight up sobbing, at first he’d be a little wary and anxious and awkward, i also believe he’d be exceptionally good at comforting someone after a few moments. his presence alone is comforting, but he knows if you need to be held or not, knows if you need to be listened to simply, or if you want advice as well, knows if you need comfort in food, or comfort in distraction. asahi just knows. and he’s definitely the one that uses that physical intimidation to his advantage when it comes to like, walking girls home, so that no one bothers them, or being in the same area as someone he knows that’s constantly bullied because just his figure alone scares them off. and my goodness, he’d definitely just subtly slide up beside a girl that he’s noticed is being eyed by men. he’s just... really pure.
motivation; i think asahi’s motivation is a little more personal, and it’s probably to believe more in himself. it’s to put himself in situations where his skills are tested so that he can improve, to lessen of his fears, to lessen of his self-doubt, to grow more confident and sure of himself, you know? towards you, oh my god. asahi would never approach you. he really wants to, because he really likes you, has liked you for as long as he can remember, but he won’t approach you, unless one of his friends threatens to do it for him. that’d probably be it honestly: he just chooses to embarrass himself instead of having anyone else embarrass him. at least he has a little more control in that former option.
asahi’s love language; he’s most definitely touch starved, so physical affection!!! he always wants to be touching you, even if it’s simple hand holding. he definitely links your pinkies together too! and honestly, i think he would like public displays of affection, even if it gets him really flustered. of course, don’t straight up make out with him in the middle of a public setting, but give him a little peck on his lips, or cheek kisses, or random hugs where you wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his chest and press a little kiss there too. also!!! forehead kisses!!!! he always, always gives those!!!
asahi’s preferred dates; stargazing, beach picnics, park visits, nights in, any place he can dance with you to slow, serene music honestly
kissing asahi; it always makes you feel all warm inside, and always flutters the butterflies in your stomach. it’s not slow, nor is it fast, it’s just steady, but it’s pouring love and passion
what being with asahi feels like; being the only one awake at home at a really late timing
MIYA ATSUMU
atsumu’s general personality; i’m sorry if i bore you guys because fair warning, this bout to be long as hell. unlike oikawa, who i think has this charming, intimidatingly skilled attitude as a front, i think atsumu’s personality is just expressed or comes off incorrectly. as in, for example, he’s really sensitive when it comes to carelessness in regards to volleyball, but it comes off as selfishness and rudeness, even though the origin of it all isn’t his want to be rude. it’s not that he doesn’t know how to express his feelings either, because i know that his feelings are loud, it’s just that he doesn’t know how to make it add up, in a way? i also think he’s self-centered, yes, but as a defense mechanism. this is gonna sound really sad but it’s more like, “i won’t give you a chance to make something awful to hate about me,” and something like, “i’m in control of why they hate me.” also, there’s no way that never affected him. maybe as a child, it didn’t really cross his thoughts, because he’s always had osamu anyways, and he couldn’t really make sense of it all, but as he grew older, the more it became clearer that he wasn’t entirely likable, and that really took a toll on him, worsening his attitude towards people. people aren’t rude for no reason, you know? there’s always a place it stemmed from. he takes refuge in that he’s good at volleyball. yeah he’s a piece of shit, but his setting? no one can top it. he has that, and he owns it, and no one can take it away from him. i think atsumu’s one of those people where, over the years, you can watch and see their light dim, in a way. like he’s not a depressed person or anything like that, he just becomes less and less... bright? angrier, irritable, less inclined to trust others and let them in, self conceited. it’s also probably a result of being left out or rejected by others. but the thing is, atsumu is all these things, but he’s also childlike, and so full of love. you can see the way he interacts on the court, his dynamic with his teammates, the way he reacts to kita’s ‘get well soon’ bag. he really is just a ball of sunshine, but it’s all cooped up inside. it’s been buried underneath a mountain of self destructive thoughts and negativity from others. i also consider him a very impulsive person, the type to never think twice before anything, but that can translate into spontaneity too! it’s both a positive and a negative thing. atsumu is also very, very trustworthy person. in short, atsumu is very cheery once around the right people, in the right setting, but he’s so quick to shift into intimidation if necessary.
motivation; of course, just like osamu, atsumu’s main drive is his brother, whose been there since he was born. there’s no one he can rely on as much as osamu, regardless of their unbelievable competitiveness and their constant arguments. however, i think there’s a little more to atsumu. going off on what i mentioned above, volleyball is his safe haven. it’s something he can fall back on and be sure and certain of the safety net available. it’s not what makes him atsumu, but it’s a big part of him, a big part of shaping his personality, which is why i think constantly improving is atsumu’s other motivation. he can’t ever let himself go, you know? towards you, well, it was probably something really stupid honestly. you might have to play hard to get with atsumu, even though either way he’s gonna like it, but the chase? he adores it.
atsumu’s love language; acts of service and physical affection. he’ll save your favorite go-to orders for every restaurant on his notes app, he’ll blow-dry your hair for you after a shower if you’re too lazy, he’ll learn hairstyles for you, he’ll hold your shirt down as you take off a sweater so it doesn’t ride up, he’ll make you try food he knows you’ll like, he stays up on facetime with you after recognizing the telltale signs of you being upset, he’ll go shopping with you, giving you a thumbs up, halfway, or down for each outfit, he’ll collect notes for you if you’re off from school, and so much more. that’s how atsumu expresses his love; that, and physical affection. always touching you somehow, someway, with his hand in yours, or on the back of your neck, or on the small of your back, or on your waist, slipping slightly beneath your shirt, or around your shoulder. and he’s always kissing you too, either on your cheek, or on your lips, or on your knuckles, or on your wrist, or your temple. and he’s always hugging you, and i mean always, you’ll have your head on his chest, or his chin tucked on your shoulder. atsumu doesn’t say i love you, he shows it.
atsumu’s preferred dates; campfires at the beach, stargazing on a rooftop, waterparks, carnival visits (tries to win you everything but can’t do shit), bowling, drive throughs
kissing atsumu; really playful but always leaves you hot and bothered. he kisses like he’s trying to prove a point, which you can’t decide on, but it always leaves you a little breathless, a little dizzy, and even more in love with him
what being with atsumu feels like; leaving a movie theatre and slightly dissociating from reality
KITA SHINSUKE
kita’s general personality; omg i love!!! him!!! kita, as shown in the anime and manga, is a very methodical person. he does things the way he always does them, routinely, and he finds comfort in that. and he doesn’t do things for the end result, he finds satisfaction in the productivity he feels, in seeing his efforts play out, in it all adding up and building up to the end product. it’s not what’s produced that matters to him, it’s more what he did and went through to be able to produce such a thing or result. which is why i think kita really is confident in his skills, and that’s obvious and seen when he’s on court. it’s because he knows all he’s done and all the effort he’s put in to be where he is now, and he knows they’re not going to fail him, he’s sure of it. his efforts are his safety net. that relates to kita being reliable, and being everyone else’s safety net. he’s very similar to daichi in that he’s the glue that sticks the team together, the final puzzle piece that completes a set. he’s also exceptionally good at being a captain, not because he leads very well, which yes, of course he does, but he knows his teammates. he knows what they need to hear, and is unafraid of telling them so, knows how to handle them properly, individually, and as a group. he’s also insanely observant in that not only is he good at reading people and situations, but also at being aware of the position he stands in. he knows he’s not what could be considered a ‘genius’ at volleyball, but not only is he aware of that, he accepts it, and accepts it with grace too. he understands that not everyone is special, but that also everyone is special in their own way, and are built based off of what efforts they put. which ties into the fact that kita is really mature, making him a reliable presence.
motivation; like i said, kita finds comfort in routine. he never truly has an end goal, just that whatever is achieved from what work he puts in he’ll believe is worth that. kita’s motivation is his everyday routines. it’s waking up, making his bed, making breakfast, cleaning around the house, or going to practice, putting in the work, staying after to clean. it’s the little moments that make up his entire day, that add it all up, that really matter, that really are his drive. for you, it would be a really simple “i want to be with them.” i don’t think kita would sugarcoat his feelings, or try to deny them with himself, even if yes, he will absolutely get flustered. his motivation towards you is literally just his desire and want to be with you.
kita’s love language; everything, but subtly. you can see that kita loves you with the way his attention is entirely on you when you speak. you can see he loves you with how he moves your hair out of your face for you. you can see he loves you in the way he says good morning to you, a soft smile on his face, a gentle kiss pressed to your forehead. you can see he loves you in the way he twirls you in his arms when you slow dance with him in the kitchen. you can see he loves you in the way his eyes light up at the simple mention of you, or the fact that everyone is aware of his love for you, in that it’s not kita, but kita and you. kita loves you wholly, and he will say it if you need to hear it, if he wants to say it, but it’s blatantly obvious, spottable from a mile away, clear and bright as day.
kita’s preferred dates; pottery making, art classes, drives around town, grocery shopping together, fancy dinners
kissing kita; everything kita does is methodical except kissing. kissing is where he lets loose, allows himself to be a little more carefree, a little more daring. he always kisses you like he’s afraid of losing you, like you’ll disappear in mere seconds
what being with kita feels like; being on vacation and waking up really early at a hotel
IWAIZUMI HAJIME
iwaizumi’s general personality; iwa iwa iwa!!!!!! i know we all like to paint iwa in this mature light, like he’s the dad of the team, but the reality of it is iwaizumi’s just as much immature at times, it’s only that he’s the most responsible and least immature out of all of them. and he is! responsible that is. he really is, and he’s reliant too, but that doesn’t mean we should reduce his personality to ‘brat tamer of oikawa’ because, come on, there’s more to him than just that. iwaizumi loves, and he loves too much, loves too hard, he cares too much, cares too hard. his way of showing it is through violence, sure, and maybe he’ll be super aggressive when he finds out you’re not taking care of yourself, but will he go to the ends of the earth to make you feel better? yes, he absolutely will, no doubt, no hesitation in it at all. it might be a little bit of a flaw too, but when iwaizumi loves, he literally hands you his entire heart in your hands with the full expectation that you’ll take care of it. he strikes me as the type of person that always expects the best of people. he’s not naive, but he does always see the best in people rather than just immediately seeing the worst. i also don’t think he’s violence-prone, either. like yes, he will beat up his friends no questions asked, but he wouldn’t start a physical fight, nor would he provoke anyone to initiate one. the only exception is to protect or to defend his friends or loved ones. i feel like that’s a red line you shouldn’t cross with iwa, because he will abandon any inhibitions when it comes to them. friends and loved ones first, then anything else. so yes, like i said earlier, iwaizumi is responsible, he’s reliable, he’s strong and sturdy (i mean,,, both physically and conceptually ig), and he’s someone that you do not want to ever lose once he enters your life. not because he’ll hurt you or anything like that, but because the loss of him in your life is significant and it’s impactful. that’s not to say iwaizumi’s not an absolute child at times, considering he literally, canonically has a godzilla phone case
motivation; honestly? i think iwaizumi does things,,, just to do them. like he gets satisfaction of course, from achieving certain things, like being one of the top aces, or from getting into a really good university, because of his good grades, from having a clear career path, from having the body that he does, from being where he is today in general, but he never had a direct motivation towards the actions that got these certain results. like sure he got into volleyball because it was a fun sport, his best friend was in it too, he got really good, he stayed, and sure he has really high grades, because he needs to, but why? he just does. he does things because he feels the need to achieve, you know? that’s his drive, essentially. the need to feel productive and satisfied with his achievements. towards you, however, it’s more serene. he wants to get to know you. that’s it. he’s genuinely just interested in you, in what you have to say, in your hobbies and interests, and your favorite movie, and your favorite song or artist, and your favorite color, what your aspirations are. iwaizumi just wants to know you.
iwaizumi’s love language; domesticity and acts of service. iwaizumi will fall in love with you if you feel like home, if you give him that deep sense of comfort settling in his chest. yes he wants the rush of it all, of being in love, the excitement of loving someone, but he also wants the calmness that accompanies it, the sureness that tags along. he likes certainty, stability, you know? and his actions will always speak louder than words. every date he greets you with flowers, meets you in front of the school gates if he hasn’t walked you and greets you with a gentle kiss on the lips and a “good morning.” will he explicitly say “i miss you”? no, but he will appear at your window at three in the morning with a backpack filled with your favorite snacks and an extra hoodie for you to borrow. he loves you, he loves you widely and large, but you have to really know iwaizumi to recognize the pattern
iwaizumi’s preferred dates; go-karting, late night drives, concerts, the beach (but at night, including swimming), picnics at sunrise
kissing iwaizumi; i can fully see him being a little shy, especially at the beginning! his kisses start off really gentle, as if he’s afraid to break you, but overtime, they develop into possessive, and a little rough, kisses. still absolutely breathtaking though
what being with iwaizumi feels like; being in an empty parking lot, with music seeping through your car’s speakers
end note; this took me like three separate days omg. i really, really hope i didn’t miss anyone haikyuu requests for this past event. it’s closed now my loves, but maybe it’ll make a comeback soon! hold onto your request till then :)
excuse any mistakes made in this if there are! and thank you for reading! i hope you all enjoyed <3
#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#hoshiumi x reader#hoshiumi headcanons#kuroo x reader#kuroo headcanons#kageyama x reader#kageyama headcanons#daishou x reader#daishou headcanons#daichi x reader#daichi headcanons#asahi x reader#asahi headcanons#atsumu x reader#atsumu headcanons#kita x reader#kita headcanons#iwaizumi x reader#iwaizumi headcanons#1k event
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Hey art!!
I'm sorry for my previous feedback. I failed to discern what was actually going on. But yeah ig that's a nice lesson which that drabble gave that we all are humans and sometimes we get so caught up in our feelings that we don't even understand why are we reacting in a certain way.
A few months back, i used to feel that I'm really mature and u know what is the best. What is right and wrong. But i used to see things from what I felt. I mean i don't know how to explain to this but ig you know right. Now, i came to the realisation that I'm not at all mature. Rather quite childish. I have now started to see things as they are and not judge them or put any bias. It is taking time but i believe that I'll be able to improve. Your drabbles have been a great help to understand emotions and how irrational they can be.
I'm really sorry. I feel guilty for what I said and if I offended you in a certain way. You're so precious and so nice that i feel really bad to talk to you like that. Thank you so much for being so polite. I hope you're better now. Take care of yourself and be hydrated. The weather is changing so there's a high chance of getting sick. I wish you health and take care of yourself!!!!
Love you loads and sending lots of hugs and kisses your way!!!
~🐻
oh no my beloved you have nothing to apologize for 🥺 i wasn’t offended at all and that’s why feedbacks are helpful!! we are all different in many ways so it’s nice for me to see other opinions and perspectives ^^ they also help me learn and improve so i’m grateful :D nonetheless thank you for being taking the time to write this message so kindly with love 🫂
and there’s something i learned for the past year that helps me a lot when i feel the same way as you— it’s possible to be mature and to be childish at the same time! as we grow up, we gather new experiences that teach us valuable lessons and lead us to have more mature thoughts and decisions. but at the same time, we never lose the childishness in us. because underneath my 19 year old self, there’s still the 13 year old me, the 5 year old me. hell, the 1 year old me who only knew how to cry and recite the alphabet 😭 and sometimes these younger versions of myself respond to certain situations instead of my 19 year old self, and that’s okay. because they’re forever a part of me, and i embrace them <3 of course i do believe it’s important to work on becoming the best person we can be, but i hope you cut yourself some slack as well and remember this from time to time ^^
and thank you for worrying about me bear anonie 🥺 i feel better but i’m still on some medications so i think i’m staying for a few more days. i’m eating well and staying hydrated, and i hope you are too!! stay healthy please :( hugshugshugs and lovelovelove 🫂🫂🫂
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Fate and Phantasms #182
Today marks the end of the Dead Heat Summer Race builds as we finish up with today’s sponsor, Ishtar (Rider)! “Ishtar is best girl, and you should give all your grails and QP to her!” Now that the ad copy’s out of the way, let’s get to her build. For this build we’re re-flavoring an old UA to create the Traveler Sorcerer (original names for everything can be found in the character sheet.) We also dip into Monk for a level because the 20th level of sorcerer is bad.
Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!
Next up: BB 2: Electric Boogaloo
Race and Background
Ishtar’s still a Protector Aasimar and she’s also still a Goddess Alliance Anarch, which means she starts out with +1 Wisdom and +2 Charisma, Darkvision, Celestial Resistance to necrotic and radiant damage, Healing Hands to slap healing into people as an action, and the Light cantrip to help out racers with dumb human eyes.
She also gets Animal Handling and Religion proficiency from her background, as well as extra spells. We’ll get into detail about that last bit as it comes up though.
Ability Scores
Not a whole lot has changed since last time; make sure your Charisma is as high as possible for good spells and good Tricking People into a Race, then make Dexterity number two to stay on your scooter as you warp between continents. Your Wisdom should also be pretty good if you want to keep an eye on anyone trying to cheat by entering a rocket into a- hold on a second.
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Where were we? Oh right, after that is Constitution. Gods don’t die. Your Strength is a bit low, but we’ll make up for that with technique and speed, so dump Intelligence. Once a Useless Goddess, always a Useless Goddess.
Class Levels
Sorcerer 1: First level sorcerers get proficiency with Constitution and Charisma saving throws, as well as two sorcerer skills. Grab Deception and Persuasion so we can get this show on the road. As a sorcerer, your Spells (which you can cast using your charisma) come from a special source, which in your case is the magic of Travel. You picked a pretty bad time for it, but I’m pretty sure gods can’t get sick? Humans can though. Stay home if you’re a human. At first level, you have a Soul of the Race, giving you a swim speed equal to your walking speed, and you can breathe underwater. DHSR is probably the least water-based summer event so far, but you get a bonus in all the other ones too, so it’ll pay off if you’re patient. You can also invoke the Curse of the Race after hitting a creature with a cantrip, lasting until the end of your next turn or until you curse another creature. Once per turn, you can trigger the curse by hitting the creature with a spell that has one of three requirements. If it deals cold damage, their speed is reduced by 15′ for a turn, or by the amount the spell already slows them by, whichever is greater. (You say you don’t play favorites, but that’s a lie.) If it deals lightning damage, it deals extra damage equal to your charisma modifier. If it forces movement, add 15 feet to the distance moved. Perfect for when you have to ground a rocket. You get a lot of spells this level, like Sword Burst for a good melee option while we wait to multiclass, True Strike so your punches can be slightly less bad, Friends to help coerce people into the race, and Prestidigitation to make yourself some free gems. For leveled spells, grab Chaos Bolt and Chromatic Orb for ways to trigger your curse with plausable deniability. Chromatic Orb even uses a diamond to cast, flavor win! You also get plenty of spells from your background for some more... “explosive” results. You get the cantrips Fire Bolt and Produce Flame, and the spells Compelled Duel, Speak with Animals, and Thunderwave.
Sorcerer 2: Compared to level 1, this level’s got a lot less going on. You become a Font of Magic to get your sorcerer level in sorcery points each long rest, which are mostly going to be useful at third level, and you can cast Distort Value to make your gems even more beautiful just by being around you.
Monk 1: Yeah, let’s just slide this in right now, why not? First level monks get Unarmored Defense to make your AC 10 + your dexterity modifier + your wisdom modifier. It’s not quite as good as mage armor, but it’s free. You also get Martial Arts, meaning your unarmed attacks use dexterity instead of strength, deal 1d4 damage, and you can attack as a bonus action if you attack as an action. Honestly you could’ve just used a knife before, but this is more flavorful. You also get to unleash your Radiant Soul as an action. You transform into a fancy shiny version, granting you flight and extra radiant damage once per turn.
Sorcerer 3: Third level sorcerers can spend their sorcery points on Metamagic to mix up your magic in a meta way. Extended Spell doubles the length of a spell’s duration, (very useful later) and Twinned Spell lets you take any spell that hits one target and make it hit two instead. You’re going to make a scooter fly eventually, it might be worth it to make sure you fly too. Fewer broken bones that way. For your first second level spell, grab Alter Self as one last preparation to trick people into racing by transforming into those close to them. You can’t change your general body type though, so you can’t turn into Charon to get Achilles to help out. Alternatively, you can use this to make natural weapons that deal 1d6 magical damage, and get a +1 bonus to your attacks and damage. Even sorcerers can do monk stuff faster than monks. You also get more background spells, like Beast Sense and Shatter. If you need to knock a rocket back to earth in the first place, it deserves to get wrecked.
Sorcerer 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Charisma for stronger spells. You also learn Dancing Lights to put on a show at the opening ceremonies, and you can cast Find Vehicle from the Modern Magic UA to summon your scooter. Technically it can be any nonmilitary land vehicle, but no matter what it is it comes with some perks. You’re automatically proficient with its handling, and double your proficiency when making ability checks about driving it. Also, spells you cast on yourself can also effect the vehicle, so I guess that twinned spell doesn’t help here. At least it gives you more damage.
Sorcerer 5: Fifth level sorcerers have Magical Guidance, making them just a bit better at everything than normal people. By spending sorcery points, you can re-roll a failed skill check, hopefully doing better. You also learn how to cast Haste to speed up your scooter to the maximum. You also learn Conjure Animals and Conjure Barrage from your background. The latter doesn’t really see play, but the former will make it a lot easier to recreate your final ascension art.
Sorcerer 6: A sixth level Traveler can use their Accel Turn to avoid damage as a reaction. When you get hit by anything dealing bludgeoning, piercing, or slashing damage, you can reduce it by your sorcerer level plus your charisma score (not your modifier, your entire score) and move 30′ away without provoking attacks. You can use this once per short rest. You can also cast Fly now. I don’t think you ever actually touch the ground, do you? (You get resistance to fire damage too. Suck it, Icarus!)
Sorcerer 7: Seventh level sorcerers get fourth level spells, like Dimension Door. It’s not a fantastical trip through the world’s greatest capitals, but all teleportation has to start somewhere. And for you, that somewhere is 500′ away.
Sorcerer 8: Use your next ASI to become a Magic Initiate to steal a couple spells from the Wizard spell list. Grab the cantrips Gust and Minor Illusion for an easy way to trigger your curse and so you can make cool holograms to go with your communications (coming later). You can also cast Find Familiar once per long rest to make a little doll you that can help out the racers. You can also cast Charm Monster now. It won’t be enough to convince Lobo to change sides, but it’ll make it much easier to find judges for the other legs of the race.
Sorcerer 9: If your DM’s a stickler against UA, you can use your fifth level spell slots to cast Animate Objects instead to bring a chair to life or something. You also learn Destructive Wave. Probably shouldn’t use that one while riding.
Sorcerer 10: Grab the new Metamagic option Seeking Spell for more accurate spells, re-rolling a failed spell attack. Your curse is based entirely on being able to hit people with your spells, so it’d be nice if you could do that. You also learn how to use Message to keep up communications with the racers even if they’re, say, stuck in prison somewhere, and you can use Far Step to teleport you and your scooter around in short bursts, using your bonus action each turn.
Sorcerer 11: Use your fancy new sixth level spell slots to create an Arcane Gate, creating portals between a point within 10′ of you and a point within 500′ of you. You can also spin them around as a bonus action, so feel free to get Looney Tunes with it.
Sorcerer 12: Use this ASI to max out your Charisma for stronger spells, then use that last remaining point to bump up your Dexterity. That doesn’t really help yet, but trust me on this one.
Sorcerer 13: Good news; you can finally Teleport now. The bad news is it’s a seventh level spell. Also, it has a slight chance to mess up, and if you’re traveling across the globe “messing up” by even one percent means you’re several hundred miles off course.
Sorcerer 14: At fourteenth level you finally get another Travel Souvenir, the ability to open a Maana Gate without using spells, making it easier to move around a battle field. When you move on your turn, you take half damage from opportunity attacks, and can move through enemy spaces (as long as you don’t end your turn there.) You can also pass through solid objects, as long as there’s at least a 3 inch diameter space to move through. (again, you can’t end your turn there.)
Sorcerer 15: Fifteenth level sorcerers get eighth level spells, and I highly suggest you go with Sunburst. Being able to teleport all over the place is fun, but if you’re trying to replicate Ishtar’s NP you actually need a payoff at the end, and that’s this spell. Deal tons of radiant damage with all those shiny stars, and blind creatures that fail their constitution save.
Sorcerer 16: Use this ASI to become more Resilient when it comes to dexterity saves. You gain proficiency in them, and you also get +1 dexterity for your troubles. That bumps you up to an even number again, so your AC improves, as do your unarmed strikes.
Sorcerer 17: Seventeenth level sorcerers get their final level 9 spell, and yours is Gate. This lets you create a portal to a precise location for up to a minute, with no chance of mucking up unless a nearby deity isn’t a fan. The downside is this specifically only works on extraplanar trips, but I’m sure you can find enough sightseeing locations to make that work. To make travel even faster, you get your final Metamagic option, Quickened Spell. Cast action spells as a bonus action now, yay.
Sorcerer 18: At eighteenth level you receive your final souvenir, a Traveler’s Soul. Now you don’t need to eat, drink, or sleep, you can ignore critical hits against you, as they only count as normal hits, and you have resistance to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage. People seem to focus on the “useless” part of your title way more than the “goddess” part. Show them why they shouldn’t do that.
Sorcerer 19: Use your last ASI for the Tough feat to grab 40 more HP. Goddess or not, nobody wants to get Power Word Killed.
Pros:
Your various defensive features make you surprisingly tanky for a spellcaster, with plenty of ways to negate common damage types and stay out of trouble.
Speaking of, thanks to your flying moped and teleporting you can be extremely mobile when you want to be, making it a real pain to keep you pinned down long enough to fight you.
You come packed with plenty of social spells giving you plenty of options to get away with stuff you shouldn’t. Break into secure areas, impersonate people, and charm foes.
Cons:
Your subclass’ features mostly focus on lightning and cold damage. Your damage dealing spells mostly come from your background, which focuses on fire and thunder. This means you can’t use your early subclass features to their fullest potential, which can make early fights difficult if you’re playing to character. That’s why I recommend you start off with Chaos Bolt and Chromatic Orb- they can be used practically at the start, then Ishtar-ly later on.
The curse of the sea is finicky, and it’s the only offensively minded feature you really get. It restricts your damage types, and it comes into play only every third turn unless you’re using nothing but cantrips. You can definitely feel this is a UA class.
You only have about 140 HP, and very little way to deal with magic damage. All of your defenses only worry about damage types associated with physical attacks, so most spells can still chew through you if you’re not careful.
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