#I love pastels but I also immediately thought up a story when I thought of the image I wanted to draw
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(Bitter) Sweet! Art & Drabble
For @divinit3a Café Lunch Rush prompt list! There's still plenty of time before the first prompt is due (Jan 12th), and there's 2 other prompts as well for the month! Definitely check it out lovelies! <3
Drabble name: Instability Of The Heart Contents: Sun x reader, Heavy Pinning, Bitter Sweetness Chosen Words: Clouds, Opals, Celebration, Star-crossed, Letting Go, Hope, Candle Word Count: 1,625
(Close Ups are also at the bottom <3)
It’s been a whole year…
Unsure how to approach the festivities now, Sun decided to find a quiet spot instead, spending all morning setting things up to participate in his own way. He couldn't not join in, but it just wouldn't be right to go back into the thick of it either.
The not-too-far-off town square, only a mile below his expanse of cloud, is alive in the lieu of celebration. The live orchestra plays the same casual songs, their passion dying the expanse of clouds they rest upon pink with their infectious energy, and the music drifts up clear as day to his ears despite the distance. The community brightens at each strum of a chord, chatter so lively that they create lyrics to their own song. They all are so alight that even once the sun sets, not even a single candle will be necessary to keep the festival bathed in a warm glow.
Sun sighed as he looked towards his namesake, feeling both relief and dread seeing it only moved a little since he last checked, located slightly past the center of the sky above him. Any moment now the square should clear its center and engage in its Hearthwarming Dance.
A spark crackles in his chest, sending longing pangs to his heart and head. It swirls through the burning magma and dips through every ligament, the tips of his fingers and toes buzzing with the itch to do something.
He turns to his partner, waiting for the first note of the new song to swell before grabbing their soft hand and whispering,
“May I have this dance?”
Without his usual banter, Sun embraces them and sways to the familiar beat without hesitation.
Upon closing his eyes, he is suddenly not dancing on a patchy field of clouds, but rather upon a lively opal plaza shimmering in the warm sunlight; the polished stone reflecting all those lovely pink clouds to create a mosaic, speckled with a rainbow of beautiful color.
Yet, the way you shined changed everything. It had completely ruined his view of beauty.
Your smile glistened through the sheer cloud of stardust that orbits around your form. Your eyes were as hypnotic as the ring of light you absorb, blindingly white before turning into a pitch black that's impossible for him to comprehend. He could barely even remember what you wore that day, too busy memorizing your face.
You were a star that had gone supernova, a rarity unseen for the last 3 centuries, let alone for a star of your kind.
Even the thought of your imagery causes him to inhale sharply. He clutches at his partner tightly, mindless of the give as he steps around in a traditional dance.
You were so scared when the change happened all those months ago...
Sun had found you holed up in your dark room, begging him to not look at you. He had initially come over to barge down your door for being an hour late to meet him, only to find your home was unlocked. It wasn't too unusual, so he welcomed himself inside, used to doing so after years of friendship.
His bitterness over how you kept him waiting for so long evaporated at finding your tearful state, almost unrecognizable if it weren't for your usual wear and voice.
He's still ashamed to say that he was enraptured by you despite the state you were in.
You were a glimmering dwarf star before, enchanting enough as is, and yet somehow you turned into something even more bewitching, compounding his years of desire into something even stronger. It felt right. Not to see you sad, but to see you in that form. Everything about it felt like you. The pull was indescribable in every step he took, the very essence of you invading his senses.
As soon as he recounts reassuring you, drying your tears, and pulling you into a hug; he snaps back to having you in his arms in the light of day, grasping his right hand and prancing with ease across the square, expertly avoiding other participants.
The magnetic pull is intense, the need to somehow get closer and closer was nearly impossible to ignore. He wanted to run away from such a force, yet he only clutched your hand tighter as he spun you, pulling your back into his chest and locking you there for a beat too long.
He was so afraid that you could read his every move, regardless of knowing your sheer obliviousness to his desires.
You always playfully indulged his yearly insistence of being your dance partner, yet nothing had come of it from either side. But this time, his gaze was constantly locked with yours, unable to break contact. His possessive grip had ensnared you, barely leaving even an inch between you. He couldn't help but pause, disregarding the mass of bodies moving around him, wanting to hold you forever.
How could it not be obvious?
Regardless, he knew it was inevitable he'd spill out his soul to you soon, barely able to restrain his lips from colliding into yours at that very moment.
He hoped, he prayed, he begged like a mantra to the celestial mother that you'd feel the same. That this magnetism isn't so one sided. That restraint would one day be unnecessary and he'd finally be able to drink in the flavor of your kiss.
Only mere seconds had passed when he released you from his hold, continuing the dance as if nothing happened. Perhaps to you, nothing did happen.
Would that explain what had happened?
He spent that whole day with you, following you to vendors with traditional carbon foods and indulging in your proximity as you'd graze hands and bump shoulders on occasion, finally left comfortably alone as the town's people were accustomed to your new appearance by then.
He was more than happy to scoop you up the moment you said you were getting tired and overwhelmed. You insisted that you didn't want the fun to end, but he could tell by the sound of your voice that you at least needed a change of pace.
The sun was setting when he leapt up stray puffs of clouds to the field above the plaza. He pranced in circles, leaping gaps to the dying beats of music, and teasing about dropping you through them when you didn't believe he could cross. Your rivers of laughter only fueled his audacity, as he never wanted to hear them end. Inevitably, his foot barely slipped off the edge of one of his more daring jumps, causing the two of you to fall forward and collide with the cloud beneath you.
Despite the grunt the two of you made at the impact, you were quick to laugh at Sun’s failure, teasing him about his cockiness biting him in the behind.
But Sun couldn't ignore the press of his body on top of yours, the echoing melody of your voice ensnaring his throat, refusing to allow him to even draw breath, let alone words. His mind fogged over, the only reprieve to his pinning troubles all pointed towards you, and he desperately needed that relief.
Your lips were more delicious than he could have ever dreamed of, your endearing expression was wide eyed and glowing.
Glowing so much that he actually had to close his eyes for a moment to recuperate, despite how much he wanted to savor your appearance.
And then with a fluttering blink, he's back in the present, kneeling down in the same position over some sad facimally of you. The cloud he molded this morning was mangled already from his delusions, but due to his fall it had melded into the cloud below it, its pink color feeling more taunting than sweet.
Sun looked down at his hand to find a tiny piece of said cloud still in it, a tear welling up in his eye.
It was too fitting.
In that original moment, it was as if you dissolved right in his arms after that kiss, but he refuses to believe anything bad happened. He searched your home, your favorite places, and even contacted your friends and family. No one knew where you were.
Some believed you to be dead after he finally admitted what happened between the two of you.
He vehemently denied that possibility, despite the plausibility. You were barely older than he was, still spry with centuries of life ahead of you. You couldn't just die from a kiss…
The only spark of hope he was given was when he questioned one of the elder Neutron stars, one of whom recalled personally knowing a singular supernova; one who had been taken suddenly to a world beyond the sky to contain their unstable make up. They had returned only once to explain their departure, before saying goodbye for their next one shortly after.
Sun brought the small puff of cloud to his lips – it should have been your hand.
He couldn't repress the tear that escaped him.
It's been a year since your disappearance. He still hasn't given up on his star-crossed lover, if he may even call you that. Your sudden departure left him wanting, stagnant, unsure of so many things.
If you reciprocated, wouldn't you have come back to him by now..?
Overtime, many have caught onto his depressed demeanor and advised him that it's best to learn to let go.
Preaching that waiting is fruitless.
Denouncing the Neutron’s tall tale of some magical plain snatching you away.
Scolding Sun for ruining his life over some runaway star.
However, he cannot help it; you own all the hope he has left. As he is unfortunately, completely, woefully in love with you.
Close Ups!
#Mwehehe had to go all out for the first prompt#tried not to spoil in the content description <3#I am SO PROUD of this!!!!!! Both the art and writing!!!#I love pastels but I also immediately thought up a story when I thought of the image I wanted to draw#So!!! Did both!!!#>:DDD#Loads of fun experimenting with ideas!#Sad boi hours#I decided to do a Sun centric drabble/art because I have done enough Moon only stuff#Like I'm doing a Moon centric fic that's around like 30k words in rn...#SUN NEEDS SOME TIME TO SHINE#But trust it was tempting to make this about moon when I started drawing... Oh my goodness the blue swatch taunted me so#Like I even messed around with layer filters and lord have mercy#Moon was trying to drag me back anytime I went over something grayscale or blue looking#Obsessed...#But! I am VERY happy I stuck with Sun though!!!#He came out SO WELL I was STRUGGLING with the sun texture for so long#CafePrompts25#dca fandom#dca community#dca art#fnaf sun#Sundrop#dca au#I just made this au on the spot...#Yes they are all stars that live in the clouds ✨#My art#x reader#x y/n#Sun x reader
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After All This Time (kmg)
When you're asked to be on the wedding party of a long-lost friend, you get the chance to reconnect with former classmate Mingyu, but not without your old feelings and struggles resurfacing.
✧˖* pairing: groomsman!mingyu x bridesmaid!reader
✧˖* w.c: 18,7k
✧˖* genre: friends to lovers, fluff, smut, angst, it's another self-indulgent 'running away from your high school past' story from me.
🎧: still into you — paramore
✧˖* warnings: alcohol consumption, a lot of not standing up for oneself, kind of unrealistic wedding timeline (i've never been a bridesmaid so bare with me), mingyu has no flaws here because... im in love with him, this might be badly written I can't really tell anymore | smut: it's messy, and rough, face sitting, unprotected penetration (don't do this), multiple orgasms (f). lmk if im missing anything
The unopened letter stares at you from across the table. Trying to ignore it by doing your housekeeping chores is pointless. Scrubbing your toilet, doing your laundry, making your bed, and even cooking your meal preps for the entire week, nothing managed to take your head away from that stupid letter, wondering what could possibly be.
You and Olivia haven’t spoken properly since graduating high school many years ago. The last time you had a full-on conversation with her was when she told you she started seeing a new guy freshman year in college, someone who went to your same high school but never knew. Besides that, your only form of “communication” was liking each other's Instagram stories and the yearly happy birthday text. A letter from her addressed to you was the last thing you expected to see today, or ever.
Curiosity finally wins as you take it and inspect it up close. The pastel pink envelope with golden details feels sturdy in your hands, and the wax seal is stamped with two initials, O and T. The boyfriend’s name appears in your memory as the realization hits you. Olivia and Thomas.
This is a wedding invitation.
Opening the envelope just confirms your thoughts, but there’s more to it than just a mere invitation. Just below some details such as dress code and the plus one, there’s a part specifically addressed to you asking you to be one of Olivia’s bridesmaids. Your stomach turns, anxiety, and excitement battling it out in each of your organs. For one, it’s really heartwarming that she thought of you as a friend still and wants you to be a part of such a special day as her wedding. On the other side, it’ll be awkward to see everyone again after such a long time, because, weirdly enough, you never encountered anyone you knew ever again, even if you didn’t move away and still frequented same places as before.
Except, maybe that anxiety is just because of one person, who’s probably going to be more than involved in this wedding. Cassie, your other best friend.
Being a trio was never a problem. Actually, it’s probably the better friend group arrangement for you. The three of you got along immediately since the first day of middle school and never looked back. It was always fun and comfortable, you thought you had found your best friends for life. But something happened around the age when girls start noticing boys, when everyone starts going on dates, flirting, kissing, getting into relationships. That’s when you realized you and Cassie had the exact same type. It became almost like a routine: you’d notice a cute guy around school but didn’t say anything, and the next thing you know, at the next party Cassie would also notice him and hook up with him. You were sure you were in your very own Truman Show.
Was it partially your fault for not saying anything? Maybe, but did it have to happen with literally every single guy you were ever attracted to? It reached a point where you would constantly doubt yourself, compare yourself to her, was she cooler? Prettier? Smarter? Funnier?
In the end, it wasn’t her fault, and you’d never blame her for that, but for your own good and the wellness of your crumbling self-confidence, you had to get away from that situation. And you did. At least until now. But it’s been years, you’re not the same person you were back in high school, and hopefully, all of your self-doubting was also left in the past.
A sky-high, lavish building stands before you in all of its glory. You were no stranger to your old friend’s rich family, but her lifestyle always managed to take you by surprise.
Olivia wanted all the bridesmaids and groomsmen to meet and get comfortable with each other, so she and her fiancé arranged a little afternoon party at their apartment. Over the few texts you exchanged with Olivia, she failed to mention the other people on the wedding party. So during the elevator ride, you think of every possibility, who could be there that you know? With how many people from school has she kept in contact with? Will you know the groom’s friends?
The doorbell rings inside the busy apartment, and a few seconds later you’re welcomed by your old friend with a bright smile. You hug Olivia tightly, the weirdness of the situation fading away for a few seconds. Afterward, you greet everyone with a shy smile, recognizing some faces and encountering new ones. Some people are standing in groups of three or four, while others sit on the couch or a few scattered chairs, talking with each other comfortably.
“While we wait for the last people to arrive, I want to start telling you what I have planned.”
Olivia announces as you walk away slowly, and you find an empty wall by the hallway to rest against.
At least twenty minutes pass, in which Olivia doesn’t take one breath, her happiness and excitement showing through her endless words. The wedding plan is not really out of the ordinary, but the scale of things, that’s the impressive part. She has seven bridesmaids, including you, plus the maid of honor who hasn’t arrived yet, and her fiancé has the same number of grooms, plus the best man. Each of you will pair up throughout the days coming up to the ceremony, and on the big day, each pair will have matching outfits and even a dance scheduled after the couple’s first dance as a married couple. Her idea was essentially thought so no one would feel out of place and enjoy the ceremony, because it should be a happy day for everyone.
While she explains everything for the second time, you take your time to look around the big room full of people. Scanning every face, there isn’t really a lot of girls you know, but the groomsmen, on the other hand, all of them went to your same high school. It seems Olivia’s fiancé still hangs out with his same group of friends. One of them, in particular, sparks a little smile across your face.
Mingyu was the only other person you considered a real friend in school. As scary and anxiety inducing as it is to have classes without your small friend group, he made it more than bearable, enjoyable even. Becoming friends with the nerdy boy assigned as your lab partner is one of the things you remember fondly about those years of your life. He was like a breath of fresh air during all the turmoil. Would he remember you?
His eyes catch yours from across the room, and an instant smile forms across his lips. After all the years that passed, he still looks the same. He’s much more mature and fully over puberty now, his broad bulky frame being one of the more standing out new things about him, but you’d recognize that confused expression and toothy smile with fangs peeking out anywhere. Your mood rapidly improves as he mouths a ‘hi’ and waves his hand lightly at you, not wanting to interrupt the bride to be. You repeat his greeting with a growing grin, but your small interaction is cut short.
Your name catches your attention, and you turn to Olivia, “you and Mingyu will be our last pair. Is that okay?”
The relief is immediate. It might be a little awkward, but at least you’ll be with someone you know. You and Mingyu look at each other once again and then nod at her, but before she can continue with whatever she is saying, the entry door opens behind her.
“Hi everyone!” The familiar voice makes your stomach drop, “I’m sorry I’m late. My boss wouldn’t let me go.”
She looks the same too, only with longer hair and more mature features on her face. Her body language holds the same coolness, as sure of herself as she was when you were younger.
“It’s fine. It’s nothing the maid of honor hasn’t heard before.” Olivia replies to her with a chuckle.
“Oh my god! I haven’t seen you in so long!” When she greets you, you straighten your posture, put on your best smile, and hug her back. “How are you doing?”
“Hey Cassie, good, good, just working my life away!”
You joke and try to ease up your emotions. Your few words manage to satisfy her as she nods with a smile, walks away, and pecks one of the groomsmen – her boyfriend? – on the lips before sitting by his side.
The schedule is easy for Olivia to finish explaining it, so in no time, food starts rolling in, and conversations pop up between everyone, either catching up or normal everyday chats. Cassie starts telling a story about something that happened earlier at her job, but you don’t really understand it. You haven’t talked to them in so long, you don’t know what they do for a living, or where they work. You don’t know them anymore, and you’re too afraid to ask.
To the side, a couple of people over, Mingyu’s talking with the rest of the grooms' friends comfortably. You want to talk to him, but what would you say? It’s not like you were the closest of friends. You never hung out outside of the school, and your friend groups never actually interacted until now. Actually, you never told Olivia and Cassie about him. Maybe because you were afraid that if you introduced him to Cassie, he’d swoon over her like the rest of the guys you ever interacted with romantically.
An uneasy feeling creeps in on you as memories of your past fight to climb up on your memory. Feelings and thoughts you haven’t felt in years come back up, almost reliving everything in a matter of milliseconds. You need to talk to someone, take your mind off of your overthinking. Because this is not the time nor the place to get so gloomy.
You get to talk with the rest of the bridesmaids, and the anxiousness of it all starts bubbling down, and you’re much more comfortable. A couple of them are close family friends with Olivia, also as rich as her, but still really nice girls, even if a little airheaded, and the rest are friends from college.
Time passes by easily, and soon enough, the sun is already set.
On the ride back home, your mind starts spiraling again. Do you even fit in with all those people? An invite to her wedding would’ve been just fine, but a bridesmaid? You feel like a total stranger, someone from her past who’s meddling around trying to sneak into a place she purposely left behind. At least you won’t have to see anyone ever again after the wedding is over.
It is said that changing your usual routine helps improving your mood, taking another path home, shopping at a new place, sitting down at a different park, trying a new coffee order, changing the little things to feel more energized and be more productive. You wouldn’t know, because every task you complete as fast as possible to be back home quickly. So, after days of not being able to think about anything else but the upcoming wedding, it’s your only option left.
With the sky lit up with golden light, the grass and trees as green as ever, and a light breeze that prevents you from getting too hot, you walk around a park you’ve never been to before, with your new ‘hot girl walk’ playlist as a soundtrack. The kids running around the playground are the only sounds that get through your ears besides the music, maybe a bark or two as well, and the sun against your skin soothes all your worries. Damn. Going on a walk does fix your mood.
A hand grabbing your arm softly startles you, and you’re about to punch the mystery person when you recognize his face.
���Mingyu?”
His eyes are focused on your fist that was ready to hit him, and you lower it down, beginning to take out your airpods.
“Sorry! You scared me!” You erupt in a nervous laughter.
“I’m sorry! I called your name but you didn’t hear me.” He stands apologetic in front of you, looking down at his feet before daring to look back up. “How are you doing? We didn’t get to talk the other day.”
“Yeah! It’s good to see you! I didn’t expect you to be there, it was a nice surprise.” Is it too weird to say that? Well, it’s already done.
He gets the tiniest bit shy at your words, his ears turning a light shade of pink before disappearing quickly.
You notice a bicycle by his side, a cute pink helmet with glittery heart stickers hanging by the handle. He must’ve been biking when he saw you and took it off before calling your name.
“I didn’t know if you were still friends with Olivia, I didn’t know if I was going to see you either.”
You fixate on the first part of his sentence, ignoring your body’s reaction to him implying he wanted to see you.
“Oh, we’re not really that close anymore.” There’s a silence as you finish your words, as it wasn’t the reply he was expecting. “Life, you know? We just grew apart.”
It was you who stopped making an effort to talk to her, but even if it was still for your own good, you’re a little ashamed to admit it to Mingyu.
“She still asked you to be her bridesmaid. That must mean something.” Ever the positive guy, he tries to make you feel better after the sour comment.
“Yeah, it’s really nice of her.” The sun shining so bright prevents you from looking up at him, but you smile, hoping he can see it.
The slow steps you’ve been taking side by side turn awkward with silence. You wanted so badly to talk to him after the other day, but now that he’s here, in front of you, you can’t think of anything.
“It’s good that you still hang out with the guys.”
You don’t know what else to say, and the words spill out of your mouth. He doesn’t seem to notice the awkward atmosphere, his body as comfortable as ever walking by your side.
“Yeah, even though not as often as I’d like.” A regretful smile forms across his lips. “Our schedules haven’t been lining up, I met Olivia in person maybe a total of three times over the years.”
“What? There’s no way you didn’t share any classes in school?”
He shakes his head, chuckling at your surprise.
“I think I only ever shared one class with her, but I didn’t really care much about her crowd back then.”
“Wow, thanks for that.”
He means all the popular guys your friends would hang out with, and you know it, but there was always something so fun in teasing him and seeing him get so pouty.
"You know I don’t mean you.”
His shoulder pushes your body lightly to the side, and you chuckle together. It’s hard to prevent the red from rushing to your cheeks. Maybe he’ll mistake it for a faint sunburn.
“That’s a cute helmet you got there.” Your eyes point to it as a way to distract him.
“Oh, that?” He picks it up with what seems to be an embarrassed voice tone, but his actions quickly override it. He puts it on proudly and looks at you with his eyebrows raised, “my sister gave it to me when I bought the bike, gets all the ladies.”
“I'm sure it does.”
Attention from women he for sure gets, but probably not because of that thing. His tall, muscular body is enhanced by the tight blue t-shirt he's wearing. You didn’t get a proper look at him the other day, and now, standing next to him in broad daylight, you almost wish you could still live in the ignorance bliss of not knowing the exact height difference between you two.
“So, what are you doing around here?”
His words make you realize you’ve been staring for a few seconds, and you look ahead, hoping he didn’t notice. He forgets to remove the helmet, making you chuckle quietly before answering.
“I just got off from work and thought it would be nice to take a different route home.”
“That’s such a coincidence! I come here, like, almost every week to bike around.”
“Wow, It really is.”
For how long have you been avoiding this specific park for no reason? Pushing away your chance of meeting the one and only person you would’ve wanted to?
A ping from his phone alerts both of you, taking you out of your little bubble.
“Sorry I-" His expression falls as he reads the new text, “I have to get going, but it was really nice seeing you!”
"Oh, sure! I didn’t mean to hold you back.” It comes out quieter than you’d like. “Goodbye!” With a simple smile and a tiny wave at him, you turn around.
Right when he gets on his bicycle again, before he starts pedaling, he looks back at you, taking your first step in the opposite direction.
“Wait!” When you turn around, he’s taking his phone out of his front pocket, “Can I get your number?”
The both of you blush at his words, and you look up at him cautiously.
“So we can catch up and, you know, get comfortable with each other for the wedding.”
You had already forgotten about that. The reason you even met him again in the first place.
“Sure!”
Your hand trembles slightly when you take his phone, and you mentally beat yourself up for it. It’s just your number! It could mean nothing.
“I’ll text you later so you can save mine.”
And with a wink, he’s off to whatever he was late to.
Great. Now you’re not only re-living your high-school anxieties but also your high-school crushes.
During the following days, you find yourself checking your phone more often than ever, always with the hope that you’ll get a new message from Mingyu. Texting almost every day since the encounter at the park, the time when you’re both free to talk has become your favorite part of the day.
It started shyly, merely updating the other about your lives since finishing high school, your jobs, and hobbies. But as time passed, the never-ending conversation eased onto your daily routines. You’d wake up and text Mingyu, update him as you arrive at work. Lunch, break, evening, clocking out, dinner. Every little free time you got, you’d text each other back and forth.
A text notification cheers you up constantly, thinking that it could possibly be him again. But it’s not always the case, like this time.
It’s Olivia reminding you that, in exactly 29 minutes, you have the dance rehearsal with all the maids and grooms. Half an hour, and you live 1 hour away from the studio she rented. A little white lie never hurt anyone, so you tell her something came up and you'll be just a little late.
You love weddings, but if you had to choose one thing you don’t like about them, it would definitely be the dancing. You can’t dance for shit. You’d tell your right leg to move forward, and your left leg would move backwards, like your body can’t comprehend instructions when they’re related to dancing. Usually, you stay in your seat, choosing not to embarrass yourself in front of all the guests, but this time, you can’t get out of it. Poor Mingyu will leave the class with at least five bruises on his feet from you stepping on him.
The dance studio is part of a new, contemporary looking building on the exact geographic center of the city, a place you would always pass by but never thought you’ll get to enter. Standing at the front desk, over half an hour late, you feel too out of place. Your clothes are probably wrong, your hair is completely disheveled, you don’t remember on which floor is your class, and you don’t even know the name of the dance teacher.
After a long discussion with the receptionist, she finally understands what you’re here for and lets you go up to the 13th floor.
The walk from the elevator to the studio feels longer than it actually is. Three to four footsteps become long, slow turtle-like steps. But not even the infinite time you spend taking four steps prepare you for your stomach to drop down to the basement at the sight of Mingyu dancing with Cassie as soon as you open the door.
His hands on her waist, her arms around his neck, dancing slowly in circles, laughing about something she just said, you can almost hear something inside you break. After all this time, nothing really changed.
“Hey! You’re finally here!”
Olivia’s voice brings you back to earth.
“Hi! I’m really sorry I couldn’t get here sooner.” The dance teacher gives you a look, and you lower down your voice, “So how is this going?”
“We had to put them together,” she points the dreaded pair, directing your eyes to them once again, “because neither you or Tyler were here when we started, but after the song’s over you can join him and I’ll practice with Cassie, okay?”
You nod with the best spirit you can manage to express.
“Is Tyler the guy she was with the other day?”
You don’t forget to whisper so the class isn’t interrupted by your chatter.
“He’s the only one of Tom's friends who’s not from school, don’t worry, you didn’t erase him from your memory.”
You stifle a laugh before it gets loud.
“Good, I was starting to feel bad about not recognizing him.”
In reality, his existence doesn’t matter much to you either way, except for something. “Are him and Cassie a thing?”
“She says it’s something casual but, and don’t tell her about this, I paired them up together on purpose so they can finally realize that they like each other!”
Your lungs clear of air in an instant after hearing those words. She’s not available. She has a boyfriend, sort of. A boyfriend who you do not know nor have feelings for.
“Your secret's safe with me.”
“Mingyu's nice and all, but if he messes with my plan and charms her, I will personally revoke his invitation to the wedding.”
You both chuckle just as the song finally ends, yours quieter than hers. Both of them see you with Olivia, but only Cassie comes forward to say hi.
“Hey girls! Good to see you!” She gives you a little hug before directing to Olivia. “So… Tyler isn’t showing up, I assume.”
“He told me a few minutes ago that something came up and can’t come, sorry.”
Her hand flies to Cassie's shoulders to comfort her, but she doesn’t seem bummed by the news.
“Well, then, I have something to ask you.”
Her presence suddenly becomes overwhelming as she grins at you with a proposition in mind, seemingly all thought out.
“Are you close with Mingyu? Olivia told me you were classmates.”
How did she know? Maybe you did tell her about him after all.
“He used to be my lab partner. Why?”
“How did you not crush on him back then? He’s such a cutie.”
“I probably did, I don’t remember.” Lie.
“Could you find out if he has a girlfriend, pleeease?”
A buzzing sound is all you hear for a few seconds, like your brain forgets how to function. Words don’t come out, and you’re freezed in place as Cassie looks at you expectantly. To the side, Olivia looks just as puzzled by her request.
“W-why?”
“Because, he’s really hot and, if I need a quick rebound because of that other fucker, I need to know I’m not messing with a relationship.”
Silence is all you produce once again.
“I just need a tiny bit of info, and it’ll be weird if I ask him directly, so could you please try?”
“Sure… I’ll try, but I’m not promising anything.”
You’ve never sounded less excited about something in your whole life. You love some gossip and some drama, but not if it involves a genuinely nice guy like Mingyu being used. Or maybe it’s just because it’s him.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
Cassie jumps excitedly and hugs you once again, just as the dance teacher calls for everyone to gather.
Mingyu’s hands slot carefully at the sides of your waist, guiding you swiftly and sparking goosebumps across your back. Your arms wrap awkwardly around his neck, making him crouch a bit so you can look properly at each other.
“Were you always this good? Or did you become a professional waltz dancer in the half hour I wasn’t here?”
You remember him telling you the other day, during your endless text conversations, that he, like you, wasn’t particularly excited about dancing.
“Let’s say, hypothetically, that I practiced before coming here, what would that say about me? Hypothetically.”
“It would say that,” you drown out a cackle before you can continue, “you take your duty as a groomsman very seriously, hypothetically.”
“Good, I wouldn’t want you to think I was a dork, hypothetically.”
“You’re too late, I already thought that.”
A pout forms on his mouth at your giggles, and he flashes the world's most menacing puppy eyes ever.
“I mean it in the best way possible!”
“Isn’t it embarrassing?”
“It’s cute!”
His face shifts with skepticism, sending enough signals saying he didn’t like your choice of words.
“It’s charming!”
The warmth his body emanates wraps around you fast. His expectant eyes looking down at you and the closeness of your bodies rises your temperature in record time, your cheeks pinking up furiously. You keep talking as the nervousness takes over you.
“At least it worked! You’re a really good dancer, I’m sorry I keep missing the beats.”
“You’re giving me too much credit. You’re not that bad.”
“Now you’re just lying. My limbs are physically unable to coordinate more than three steps. You’re guiding me through every single one!”
His hands tighten just the tiniest bit around your waist, like a confirmation for the both of you that they’re still there.
The teacher’s voice echoes all around you until it finally punctures your bubble, and you’re able to hear the class you’re here for. The steps she’s explaining for a second time make no sense in your head, too many turns and moves for you (and your body) to comprehend.
“I need all the pairs to practice the final steps again.”
Only her final words make sense on your mind, and when you look towards Mingyu, his hand left its place on your body and is extended at you, his eyes kind yet concentrated back on the dance. You nod, taking his hand with an electrifying rush going through your veins.
Mingyu guides you firmly but with care, moving along the beats of the waltz. With each step, your synchronization improves, and the moves flow along easily, your bodies understanding each other. You can’t help but smile as you look him in the eyes, a familiar warm feeling bubbling up inside you.
“You're doing a really good job.”
His eyes catch yours, a little wrinkle forming by each of their sides before he cracks a smile to match yours. There’s something in the way he looks like when paying attention to you, like a spell being casted on you, making you crave more.
“It’s because it’s comfortable with you.”
Your mouth betrays you and sends out the words without checking with your brain, but weirdly enough, you don’t fear his reaction. It’s just the truth.
“We’re more in synch than you thought.”
You swear you see a glimpse of a smirk before he spins you in his arms.
As you turn and move together through the song, you think your excitement isn't solely because of the rehearsal going well. It could be simply a wish, but a spark of something is definitely lighting up. The way Mingyu holds you, attentive and confident, you can't help to think he feels it too.
“You think we can be this good the day of the wedding?”
There’s more anticipation than curiosity in your voice, remembering you’ll keep meeting until then, you’ll keep seeing him.
Mingyu reaches closer until his warm breath fans your ear and his lips graze your cheek.
“We could meet a few days before and practice, like I hypothetically did today.”
“You think I need practice?” You tease to hide the blush creeping up your cheeks.
“Maybe it’s an excuse to see you again.”
A mix of shyness and giddiness overtakes you as you giggle at his proposition. But in the midst of your interaction, you skip a crucial move and begin to turn, stepping right on one of Mingyu’s feet and almost tripping over to the side. His hand secures you by the waist, the hem of your t-shirt raised just enough so his fingers brush your fiery bare skin.
“Ok, maybe I do need the practice too.”
The teacher talks to you on the background, but it’s hard to concentrate on anything other than Mingyu’s touch lighting fires across your body, his worried eyes over your ‘almost’ fall, and his smile when he realizes you’re laughing at your clumsiness.
The music starts over, and you only realize it because his hand is extended at you once again.
“Let’s give it another try.”
“So, you didn’t get to ask him?”
“I’m sorry, I forgot about it. I was so focused on learning the dance that it slipped my mind.”
Running into Cassie coming out of the subway was the last thing you expected (and wanted) right now. Trying on dresses is the one bridesmaid related thing you were least excited about. So many hours of putting clothes on and off, picking colors, showing the rest of the girls, giving your opinion on their dresses, and listening to their opinions on yours. It just sounds so exhausting. But your mental pep talk got interrupted when Cassie saw you walking up the stairs of the station heading to the bridal shop.
“It’s okay, don’t worry about it.”
“He didn’t say anything that would imply he has one, if that helps.”
More than a helping hand to her, you're starting to hope he’s single too.
“That’s good to know, thank you.”
“I don’t really get why you wanted to know, though. I thought you had a boyfriend.”
“He’s not... I mean, it’s not like, official. I wanted him to get jealous, but I'm over that now.”
“Oh, so... you talked about it with him?"
“Kind of... he just explained why he couldn’t come to the rehearsal, and I just, couldn’t get mad at him simply for that, right?”
“Right...”
You know virtually nothing about their ‘relationship’, or about him for that matter, so it’s maybe for the best to stay out of their… thing.
“Anyway, about today, do you have something in mind for your dress?”
“Not really, I was just thinking of browsing through the store and seeing what they have.”
“Wow, really? You’re so chill about it. I have a pinterest board with all the styles and shapes I like. I even checked their online store to see what they have in stock beforehand.”
“That’s… actually really smart.”
“Nah, don’t be nice. Did you at least think of a color? Olivia wants all of us to be different colors, but in pastel, obviously. I personally didn’t really care about it, but I chose pink after some thought.”
“Oh, actually, I didn't know that.”
“It’s okay, you can decide when we get there.”
“Did the rest of the girls choose already?”
“Maybe? I haven’t had the chance to ask them.”
“I hope I don’t get green then, I don’t really like how it looks on me.”
“You’ll look amazing either way. Don’t let a simple color wear you down!”
Small talk with Cassie turns out to be quite nice in the short walk you have up to the store. It's a pretty shallow conversation, but not at all stressful like you thought.
The place is really fancy looking, tall glass windows and blinding white interior. It makes you take a breath just by looking at the displayed dresses. Relieved that Olivia said multiple times that she’ll take care of everything and not to worry about the prices, you and Cassie walk inside.
You didn’t expect every girl to be already there, and you especially didn’t expect the groomsmen to be also all there. The girls browse through racks and racks of different shaped and colored dresses, and the men are sitting back, talking with one another, waiting for their bridesmaid to ask for their opinion.
Cassie goes straight to greet Mingyu with a hug. Even if he isn’t the closest one to the door. Even if Tyler is there also. And you walk behind her, slowly, shy because of all the people aware of your arrival. You give Mingyu a shy smile as a greet, and he returns it warmly.
After the dance rehearsal all those days back, you’ve been hesitant about contacting him again. There’s nothing wrong with him. It’s quite the opposite, actually. He’s caring, attentive, and kind towards you. You just don’t want to fall in your black hole of a crush on him again. especially after Cassie made it clear to you that he’s caught her eye too. Sure, she just told you she made up with her boyfriend, but her actions are already contradicting her words.
Olivia sees you with Cassie and walks quickly towards you two with a smile on her face.
“Hey girls! How do you like the store?! Isn’t it huge?”
“It’s unbelievable! I’m gonna need at least two hours to look through all the dresses!”
Cassie answers, staring at the lengthy room in awe. You can feel Mingyu’s eyes on you. Or maybe on Cassie. Regardless, you’re in his line of sight, and it gives you chills.
“Well, you have all the time in the world today. I reserved the whole store for the entire day for all of us, and the staff is also here to help us if needed, so don’t worry about asking for help!”
“That’s amazing!” You both exclaim at the same time.
“Thank you!” Cassie doesn’t look back and goes straight to the racks of pink dresses. You’re about to go and walk around as well. Maybe try to find a color that suits you, but Olivia stops you before you can even take a step.
“Wait! I got the list of the available colors left for you,” she hands you a sheet of paper with almost everything on it crossed out, “I’m sorry, I know there isn’t much left.”
“Oh don’t worry, it’s fine. I should’ve picked it earlier. It’s not your fault.”
It’s disappointing to see that only two items aren’t crossed out. Light teal and pastel green. Green and teal aren’t ugly colors by any means, but you always feel awkward when wearing them, so you’ve learned to avoid them. The back of your throat itches to close as you think about looking ugly at the wedding, in front of so many people, in front of him.
“I saw some of the teal dresses earlier, and they’re all super cute! You’ll look amazing!”
“Oh, ok, I’ll go check them out. But, just in case, isn’t there any way for me to change colors?”
“You could ask someone to swap with you.”
Your mind instantly goes to Cassie. Earlier, she told you she didn’t care which color she wore, maybe she wouldn’t mind switching with you. You spot her easily on one corner, asking Mingyu about his opinion. She looks up at him with glittery eyes as one of her hands places itself on his arm. The sight turns your stomach upside down. You want to stop watching the scene as much as you want to break them apart.
Your legs make the decision for you and walk you to where they’re standing. They don’t notice you walking over to them until you speak up.
“Hey, sorry to interrupt you guys, but Cassie, could I ask you something?”
Mingyu’s the first one to look up at you, his face lighting up as you interrupt whatever Cassie was saying to him. She’s slower, making sure to hang the dress back on the rack before turning to face you.
“What do you need?”
There's very little annoyance on her tone, but you don’t miss the way her eyebrows arch and her eyes dart to Mingyu, signaling you that she wants some alone time.
“I wanted to ask if you, by any chance, were willing to switch colors with me?”
“What happened? Which ones are left?”
“Basically, just green.”
“Oh, that’s such a bummer.”
There’s a silence when she finishes talking. You wait for her to continue, blinking at her, but she just doesn’t. Her sentence ended there.
“Yeah, so, would you swap with me?”
“I…” Her body language turns awkward as she thinks of an answer, side-eyeing Mingyu, who’s also waiting for her, but with no context to what you’re asking her.
“I just, you said you didn’t really care about the color, so I thought you wouldn’t mind changing it.”
You huff, not helping the awkward atmosphere around the three of you. Your eyes connect with Mingyu’s, who's silently watching the interaction from the side. You hate that he’s seeing you in such a state, so... desperate for something that’s not that big of a deal anyway. You need this interaction to be over.
“You’re right, I did say that,” you can already see where this is going, “but, I kinda already put my mind to it, and it took a lot of convincing to get Tyler to match with me. He already bought his suit, and I don’t want to make him mad by changing everything so suddenly, I’m sorry.”
“Oh…”
You can feel your stomach contracting, your throat threatening to close, your eyes getting ready to be filled with tears. This is so stupid. It’s just a stupid color. It's a stupid dress you’ll never wear again. Why is it affecting you so much?
“Wait, I’m sure Tyler wouldn’t mind changing.”
Mingyu’s soft voice sounds closer to you, but you can’t really see much with your eyes trained to the ground and vision blurry from tearing up.
“No, it’s fine, let’s not bother him.”
Blinking away the tears is easy, but looking up and finding a concerned Mingyu makes you feel like jelly. Cassie’s long forgotten as you focus on him, his tall figure watching over you, his hand placed on your shoulder, squeezing lightly, silently comforting you.
“I’ll go try and find something I like.”
“I can look with you if you want.”
“No, it’s fine, you can go back to what you were doing.”
You walk away, leaving him standing there, still worried about your sudden reaction. Cassie is just behind him, waiting for the opportunity to get his attention back.
But you try not to think about him or her while browsing through the store. Trying your best to be positive, to not get dragged down by a simple color choice, or by a friend – if you can call her that – that couldn’t help you.
Hours go by, and it’s easier when you focus on other things. You help the other girls decide on their dresses, reacting and applauding, helping them find new ones if they aren’t satisfied. It’s fun, contrary to what you previously thought, it’s like playing a dress up game, except every now and then, it’s Cassie who comes out on the make-shift runway, and the first opinion she asks for is always Mingyu's.
At one point, everyone has already decided, and you’re the only one left. All the girls you helped come together to try and find you the best possible dress, bringing a new one to you with hopeful smiles on their faces every few minutes.
You try them on, eager to find one and be done with it. But, even if they look gorgeous when on the hanger, they always got something that doesn’t sit right with you when you put them on. And after trying dress after dress, you grow more discouraged.
Olivia notices how tired you are and tells you that you can come back another day, alone and less anxious, but then again, that would mean stretching the situation for longer than needed. You decide to try on one more dress, one that Olivia picked specifically for you, and if you’re not satisfied, you’ll come back with her the next day.
The store lady helps you put the dress on, her sweet smile never fading, even if it’s the tenth dress she helped you put on already. The pastel green silk fabric glides smoothly over your skin, hugging you in the right places as the lady zips it up. Your back’s facing the mirror, too afraid to look in it again and find another disappointing result.
“Sweetheart, I think this is the one.”
The kind woman’s voice startles you, but her honest smile makes you believe her words. You inhale deeply, calming yourself before turning around. But instead of looking at your reflection, you walk outside the changing room and onto the lobby.
Every pair of eyes is on you the moment you step out, your arms wrap around your torso in an effort to shield yourself, and you can feel your cheeks being painted a bright red color. A few gasps are heard, and when you look around, the girls who helped you are all covering their mouths, eyes wide as they watch you cautiously strolling forward.
At the back of the store, it’s like time stops for Mingyu. Whatever he was doing, forgotten at the sight of you. He was unaware of how much your appearance could affect him. His eyes are trained on you, allured by your figure, scanning you up and down like a piece of art worth studying.
Buzz erupts all around you, mumbles and praises about your dress and how you look in it, but it’s all background noise for you. Mingyu’s heavy stare finds yours, and his ears turn a faint shade of pink. The subtlest smirk begins to form on his lips, spreading the warm feeling on your tummy all across your body. He can’t seem to drive his eyes away from you, and you don’t want him to. Your arms relax under his gaze, disarming the protective shield around you and drop to hang by your sides.
But, in a matter of seconds, the girls swarm around you, blocking all 360 degrees around you. Their positive opinions flood your ears as they walk you back to the dressing room, trying to convince you to choose this dress. You can’t look back, but you’re sure all the groomsmen left together.
Doesn’t matter. You’re definitely getting this one.
After spending the whole day shopping together, it marvels you how these girls still want to spend time together. When they noticed all the boys left, they planned an impromptu girls' night at Olivia’s apartment.
It’s amazing how they can spend hours and hours talking with each other, a few drinks here and there, never running out of topics, entertaining you when you’re too tired to talk.
Your phone vibrates in your pocket, and you sit back on your side of the couch to read the new text.
Mingyu: hey, how are you?
Mingyu: sorry i couldn’t stay today, they dragged me to a boys night
Everything that happened a few hours ago flashes through your mind, waking a giddy smile on your face as you reply.
You: why are you sorry?
You: the girls wanted to do a ‘boys free’ night, we’re at Olivia’s rn
Mingyu: i didnt want to leave before making sure you were okay
Oh.
You: im better now
You: it was fun helping the other girls, took my mind off of it
You: but thank you, you didnt have to worry
Mingyu: good to know :)
Mingyu: next time ill drive you home
You: drive me home? Will i sit on the bike's handlebar?
Mingyu: i was thinking more like a piggyback ride
You: hmm... ill have to think about it
You tune back to the conversation before anyone notices you not paying attention, having no idea what turns the topic has taken in the time you weren’t listening.
“I think he’s definitely seeing someone.”
The girls divided into two groups with different conversations going on, but sitting in front of Cassie, you can only hear her side of the table. They might be talking about Tyler and their “relationship” problems.
“I really don’t think he is. He didn’t use his plus one you know.”
A smile forms in your mouth when your phone vibrates in your hand once again.
Mingyu: can you believe the wedding’s so close already
You: times moving so fast
You: i cant believe its less than two weeks away
Mingyu: it feels like it was only yesterday that tom told me he was getting married
“But today, he didn’t seem at all interested, he was really out of it from the start.”
“Maybe seeing dresses all day is not his thing.”
“No but like, I tried every move on him, and he didn’t even bat an eye.”
Bits and pieces of the still going conversation manage to register on your mind, and you realize they’re talking about Mingyu, unaware of your current chat with him.
You: is the boys only hang out getting boring? Its not very polite to be on the phone you know
Mingyu: theyre all playing games, havent looked my way in over 30 mins
Mingyu: besides i much rather talk with you
You: well i wont argue with that
Mingyu: you seem bored too
You: you’re definitely helping me get through the night
“Maybe he’s just not interested in you.”
Olivia teases Cassie, even though her comment is more than just a joke. But why is Cassie so adamant on wooing Mingyu if, according to Olivia, she really likes Tyler?
“I’ll be the judge of that.”
Mingyu: you know what I just realized
Mingyu: I forgot the dance routine already
You: omg me too
You: we might have to meet to practice like you said
Mingyu: we can do it at my place
Mingyu: you up for it?
You: i should ask you that
You: your feet are going to suffer because of me
Mingyu: that’s a risk im willing to take
Mingyu: but I gotta warn you, I take my practice very seriously
You: sure, you can carry me back to my apartment after we're done
Sitting on Mingyu’s couch, waiting for him to get back from the bathroom, you’re too tired to do anything else than looking around his living room. It’s so him. The warm and neutral colors make everything feel cozy, with pictures of him and his family hanging on the walls – no ambiguously romantic photos with unfamiliar girls, and everything is so tidy, not one pillow out of place, even after practicing for over an hour. Out the window, you can see the sun starting to set, and the buildings across the street start lighting up. You recognize all of them.
All this time, he’s lived so close to you. His building barely a ten minute walk away from yours. You can’t help but wonder, what would’ve happened if you kept in touch, if you just walked two more minutes to the park he frequents, or sent him a follow request on Instagram the few times he popped up on your recommended. It comforts you that at least you have this chance to reconnect with him, to make things right.
But sounding confident over text is easy, and now, you’ve only danced for the whole time you’ve been here, barely even talked about anything else.
It’s conflicting, the guilt of meeting with Mingyu behind everyone’s back – even if it’s no one’s business –, the excitement of seeing him alone after weeks of only wedding related stuff, and the actual need to practice the dance so you don’t embarrass yourself, all colliding in your mind, making everything awkward for you.
Like ten thousand spectators, the windows of every apartment watch you through the glass, just sitting, waiting. Mingyu left only a couple of minutes ago, but after the many times you stepped on him, you wonder if he’s actually hurt.
“Are you okay? Tell me if I need to call a doctor for your feet!”
You shout with your head looking towards the bathroom door. His chuckle travels all the way to your ears before he opens the door.
“I’m fine, I swear.”
As he comes out, your body tingles with nervousness once again. He sits beside you on the couch, unknowingly making your head spin.
“You sure? I don’t think feet are supposed to withstand all of that.”
“I’m okay, just tired, why don’t we rest for a bit?”
They way he sits, on his side, facing you, and his arm resting on the back of the couch, your eyes can’t help but wander to where his arm muscles start showing. Every variation of the phrase “butterflies in your stomach" could describe the way you feel as he watches you, paying so much attention that you mumble your next sentence.
“This couch is way too comfortable. It makes me want to just stay here the rest of the day.”
“Let’s do it! We can even have dinner here. If we order take out, we can tell them to leave it at the door.”
“That sounds nice, but one of us will have to go get it.”
“When my roommate comes home, he’ll bring it inside for us.”
“Oh my god, you have a roommate? When is he coming back? I don’t want to be a bother.” You look towards the entry hallway, like he’s about to come in and kick you out.
You really don’t want to leave, Mingyu’s company is already becoming one of your favorites, but you hadn’t counted on being around another person, and in their home for that matter. You start to get up from where you’re sitting, worried about having overstayed your welcome, but Mingyu’s hand grabs yours softly and drags you back down.
“I invited you here. It’s not like you’re trespassing.”
“But I’ve been here for hours, is it not too much?”
“I guess I don't want you to leave.”
His hand hasn't let go of yours, his skin against yours waking up your whole nervous system. You like how it feels when he’s looking at you, but you can’t help feeling too observed under his gaze.
“Should we practice one more time?” You get up as your other hand takes Mingyu’s free one to try and get him off the couch too. He doesn’t fight your push, but you still struggle to move him barely an inch.
“Now that I think about it, my feet do really hurt.”
When he stands up, your hands dreadly separate as you go press play on the song you had paused earlier.
“You’re a big and strong man, you can handle one more dance.”
The music starts slowly, and when you turn around to go where Mingyu’s standing, he’s quick to put his hands around your waist and bring you to him.
Like that day in the dance class, your bodies are quickly coordinated. You’ve been over the same dance for over an hour now, so at this point, every step is engrained in your muscle memory forever.
“Why don’t you take the lead on this one?” He might’ve felt your sudden confidence in the moves, but fails to realize it’s only because you’re doing it with him.
“Do you have a death wish? The last time I tried to take the lead on a dance like this, it ended really badly.”
“But you’re doing good now! I’m sure it couldn’t have been that bad.”
“Don’t you remember the senior prom? When I made my date trip and he fell onto the chocolate fountain? He got completely covered in melted chocolate.” He shakes his head, making you more confused. “He dislocated his shoulder. You really don’t remember?
“I don’t-” He chuckles at your story but stops his words when he realizes you don’t get what he wants to say, “We left early.”
“Oh… I guess you had a good time with your date.” Thinking about him with someone else puts a bad taste in your mouth.
“I didn’t have a date, I went with the guys.” Somehow, that’s less believable than you being a good dancer.
“I vaguely remember seeing you dance with a girl. Is my memory failing me?” You remember because you hated it.
“Maybe I did dance with someone, but I couldn’t score a real date.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“I am! Why don’t you believe me?
“Because I knew at least ten girls who had a crush on you back then.”
The dance is already forgotten. None of you make the effort to go over the moves. With your arms hanging around his neck and his hands holding on to your waist, you’re just going around in slow circles, eyes connected as your talk turns into something more.
“Well, I wasn’t interested in them.”
“But still, you could’ve easily gotten a date.” You could let the subject go, and maybe you should, but you really want to make your point. “I would’ve gone with you.”
“Don’t say things you don’t mean.”
“But I mean it.”
“You wouldn’t have gone with me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Yes I do!” His tone gets serious, and it just makes you more desperate to make him understand. He needs to know he’s wrong.
“No, you don’t! You would know if you had asked!”
“I wanted to!
You stop in your tracks, looking straight into his eyes, seeing little hints of shock on his face as he realizes what he said. If your bodies were closer, you’re afraid he could feel that you stopped breathing for a second.
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because I knew at least ten guys who had crushes on you back then,” you’re about to shut him off, but he continues, “and you did end up going with one of them.”
“So, you did see me.”
“Yeah, didn’t stay much after that."
None of you know what to say, as your minds work tirelessly to understand what this conversation means.
“You really should’ve asked me.” There’s so much more you want to say, but you simply can’t.
“You were kind of popular and, I don’t know… It messed with my head.”
“I didn’t care about those stupid labels, and I thought you didn’t either.”
“I know you didn’t, but I wasn’t a confident kid back then, I couldn’t just go up to the girl I liked and ask her out.”
Your jaw reaches the floor after hearing those words. The girl he liked?
Speechless for a few seconds, you can only look at him, trying to figure out if he meant to say those words specifically. He seems to be proud of what he said, showing no sign of regret.
“So, now that you’re all grown up…” you dare to let your fingers caress the skin at the base of his neck, and his hands tighten around you at the touch.
“One would think that, after so many years, things would’ve changed but-”
“I don’t believe you’re not confident by now.”
“That did change, but apparently, other things didn’t, even after growing up.”
He tilts his head to the side cockily, his piercing gaze making you feel hot all over.
“Maybe some things aren’t meant to change.” Like an adrenaline rush, it’s your turn to feel confident as one of your hands starts playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “I'm starting to discover some things are not that different for me either.”
“Could it be, perhaps, the same thing I’m talking about?” His arms wrap around your waist, bringing you closer to him little by little.
“Hmm, I don’t know, you’re being very vague, I could be talking about still enjoying country music.” You joke so he doesn’t notice your heart beating twice as hard as normal.
“I think you know what I mean.” His smirk is one new thing about him, not that you’ve never seen it before, but the reason behind it makes it way more thrilling to see now.
“I want to hear you say it.”
“You really didn’t know? I mean, back then, I always thought I made it obvious.” His chuckle sends shivers down your spine.
“I wish I did.” You can’t help but think about how your life would be if you made a move on him all those years ago. “But I never said anything either, I was shy too.”
“Good thing we can make up for the time we lost.”
His droopy eyes send you down a spiral you have a hard time coming back from, all your insides becoming putty, feeling his want through his embrace, but there’s still one more thing to get to.
“You know… you say you’re so confident now and whatnot, but I still haven’t heard you say it.” The look you give him is all he needs
“Fine, you win, I used to like you, and seeing you again made me realize I still kinda really do, I’m always eager to get your attention and to spend time with you.” He pauses to take the quickest breath ever, all while you’re losing yours. “I know we’re not the same people as back then, but if you want to, we can get to know each other, again, more mature and less stupid. I have my regrets about how I handled my feelings in the past, but I won’t make the same mistakes again. And I will ask you on a date after the wedding, just a heads up.”
“Wow, I was fine with just an ‘I like you’, but it’s nice to see you’re just as down bad for me as I am for you.” You confess with a joke because, how can you possibly answer that? Your brain is barely receiving enough oxygen as it is.
“And one last thing, I really, really, really, want to kiss you right now.”
“Then why are you not doing it?”
It takes a second for the words to register in his head. A second where you only look at each other, almost not believing what’s happening. The air around you gets so thick, so hot, almost unbearably heavy. And just when your hands begin to push his head your way, his lips attack yours.
All the resurfacing feelings come to life, colliding like a thousand stars that have been running to meet for millions of years. His arms around you bring your body closer to his, forcing you on your tiptoes to follow his lead while his hair tangles between your fingers.
It's surprisingly slow, yet hungry and desperate, making the other feel everything through the connection of your lips. You move along with him naturally, and when he bites your lower lip as a request for access, you don’t hesitate. His hands creep under your shirt just as his tongue dares to move past your lips, exploring your whole body to his liking.
Your chests flush together, leaving little to no space between your bodies, and you can do nothing but melt in his embrace. Your hands wander around his arms and back, touching and feeling every muscle they encounter on their way. When his hands travel down your lower back and reach your ass, you sigh on his lips and immediately feel his smirk against you.
A furious knock on the door makes you both jump and separate, leaving you looking at each other, breathless and with confused faces, until you hear a knock again, as strong as the first one. That’s when Mingyu decides to check his phone and sees it's his roommate, who had apparently forgotten his keys. Both a blessing and a curse.
“Bro, what the hell? I’ve been calling you for about 15 minutes.” You hear the door opening, followed by a new, deep voice.
“I told you I had company.” Their voices echo through the hallway.
When they finally reach the living room where you’ve been awkwardly trying to make yourself look presentable, the roommate's face morphs into something, a mix of surprise and realization. You rush to gather your stuff after muttering some variation of ‘hello’ and 'goodbye' to him. Your heart still pumps twice as fast as normal, and you don’t trust you’ll be able to handle yourself if you stay for longer.
“I’ll see you on the weekend?” Mingyu asks when you’ve both reached the entry, his hand on the handle, hesitant to unlock the door.
You want to kiss him again so badly. His lips are parted, still swollen, calling to you to connect them with yours again.
“Find me when you crash the bachelorette party.” You make your best effort to sound confident and not at all dizzy because of him.
“You know about that?”
“The bridesmaids know everything... It’s only a surprise for Olivia.” You peck him goodbye, like a promise for more. And the feeling of his lips on yours lasts all night.
It’s roughly around 1 am. when a high-pitched scream from Olivia announces to everyone at the bar that the bachelor party has officially arrived.
The effects from all the alcohol you consumed in the last 4 hours are just starting to fade, only a little buzz left. But that doesn’t prevent you from seeing what’s happening all the way across the room.
Mingyu standing with his hip resting on the barstool, listening to Cassie as she drunkenly asks him something. You want to stop looking, not wanting to let all your previous feelings resurface again, not after the recent development in your relationship with him. But just as soon as you’re about to turn your head the other way, Mingyu interrupts Cassie’s rumbling and tells her something, to which she doesn’t respond, nods awkwardly, and just walks away, leaving him standing there.
That’s your signal to walk over to him.
“Looks like I found you first.”
“Damn, I wanted to get you a drink first.”
The music and the people drunkenly signing and shouting makes it hard for your voices to reach the other, and Mingyu takes the opportunity to take a step closer to you.
You stand against the bar as the room grows warmer and warmer the closer his body gets to yours. His height taunts you as he stands against the bar as well, forcing you to look up so you can see the smirk on his face. His fingers play with yours as the intensity of his stare increases. You don’t care that you’re in public, that anyone from the wedding can see you two. Maybe you want them to.
“How’s your night going?” His hair tickles the side of your face.
“It was really fun, I might be growing fond of the girls." You don’t remember much, just a vague memory of many different games you played to get drunk, and the feeling of being happy. “How about yours? Don’t tell me you went to a strip club or something like that.”
“Actually, we did a drunk escape room, didn’t even know those existed until today.”
The closeness between you is getting more worrying by the second, mainly because if you hear his low chuckle next to your ear one more time, you might pass out.
“That sounds horrible!” You chuckle away from his personal space, only to encounter his hungry eyes already looking at you.
“It was fun, I wish you could’ve been there.” His honesty has a sultry tone to it that makes your lungs completely empty of air.
“I’m not sure we would’ve made a good team.”
“Why? You’re smart! Or at least you were back then.”
“Hey! I still am!”
“I really have to get to know this new you.”
The pink and blue lights reflect on his face, giving him the most beautiful sparkles on his eyes, directed at you.
“It’s not that new, I’m still very introverted, don’t talk much when there’s a lot of people around.”
“I like that, you’re observant, good thing to be while in a escape room.”
“We’re still talking about that?”
“Maybe, maybe not, I don’t really care, I just wanted to spend time with you.”
“Are you drunk?” You can only ask with a smile plastered on your face, but he shakes his head.
“You kinda make me feel like I’m a teenage boy again, I don’t know how to explain it.”
“I think I get it.” You place your hand on his chest, feeling the beating of his heart under it, even harder than the music blasting out of the speakers.
“You know, back then, every time I had a free period, I would make my friends walk past whatever class you had, just to get to see you, at least for a second.” Out of everything he’s drunkenly confessing, this may be the one that surprises you the most because you really never realized he felt the same. He notices you freezing in place. “Once they found out, I was relentlessly bullied by them.”
“I sure hope it was worth it.” If the lighting was any better, he'd be able to see the cherry red covering your cheeks and ears.
“Every second of it.” Everything around the two of you moves slower, like time’s stopping only for the outside world, and the muffled background noises do nothing to pierce the bubble around you. “I really want to take you on a date, a real one.”
“I would very much like that.”
You can see the gears turning through Mingyu’s eyes, and you move your eyes down to his lips so he can take the hint. But nothing happens as someone else enters your little world.
Olivia’s aware that something’s going on, her eyes switching back and forth between the two of you before she speaks.
“I need your help, I’m sorry to interrupt, but I’m getting worried about her.”
“About who? What happened?” Mingyu stays behind you as you turn to Olivia, grabbing one of your hands, and his warmth gives you goosebumps.
“It’s Cassie, she’s been sitting alone in the restroom for I don’t know how long, she's way too drunk and I can’t take care of her.”
You now realize she’s slurring her words, meaning she’s also too drunk and therefore can’t take care of another drunk person, leaving you no choice but to go help Cassie. You look back at Mingyu, who encourages you to go, even if it takes a little too long for his hand to let go of yours.
The graffitied restroom provides you with a little more light than the rest of the place, and when you enter, you recognize Cassie sitting on the floor inside one of the stalls. Luckily there’s no one guarding the bathrooms because if she’s seen throwing up, it could potentially get you both kicked out.
You sit on the dirty floor beside her without saying a word, letting her know you’re here to help without giving her a headache. Her forehead’s resting on top of her knees as she hugs her legs tightly. But after a minute or two of silence, you decide it’s best to check if she’s at least awake.
“Cassie? Are you okay?” Your hand on her shoulder makes her look up at you.
“I don’t feel so good, I just want to sit down for a while.” She sounds tired, her husky voice giving away all the talking and singing she’s been doing all night.
“Do you need anything? I can get you a cup of water.”
“No, please, just stay here a bit, I didn’t want anyone to see me but I don’t want to be alone.”
“Ok, I’ll stay, let me know if you need something, anything.”
Time passes by, the music making it easier for you to not get bored. A few people enter the restroom from time to time, too drunk or too in a hurry to notice you both sitting down. Olivia passes by the door a few times, hovering, checking if everything’s okay (and if you’re still in the same position as the previous time). You just smile and nod, letting her go back to her party time and time again. But at last, in one of her check-ins, she finally walks inside.
“Hey, Mingyu’s looking for you!” Both you and Cassie look up at Olivia, but her eyes point at you. “What do I tell him?”
You instinctively look to Cassie by your side, and her expression falls.
“Don’t, don’t go with him.” She finds the strength to plead to you, but she seems more worried than anything.
“Why? Did he do something? Is that why you’re hiding here?” Olivia asks, and you realize she didn’t leave after you didn’t answer her.
“No, no, I mean, yes I’m hiding from him, but he didn't do anything, it was me, I embarrassed myself.”
“Why are you telling me not to go with him then?”
“Do you like him?”
“I-” Wow, blunt question out of the blue.
“You can be honest, it’s fine.”
“Yeah, I do, I like him.”
Telling them, her, the truth feels kind of freeing. Finally admitting in front of them that you like someone, after not being able to for so many years, it’s like you can finally breathe.
“Then, for your own good, don’t go with him, he’s seeing someone.”
“What? How do you know?” That freedom lasts barely seconds before a new weight falls right on top of your lungs.
“He told me, when the guys got here, he said that he’s been after a girl for years and they recently started going out.”
“Are you sure? Did he use those words?”
“I’m not saying it verbatim, I don’t remember it exactly word for word, but that’s what he meant.”
Could he possibly be talking about you? How recent is ‘recently’ supposed to mean? You haven’t even started officially dating. Is confessing your feelings considered the start of dating? Is it supposed to be this confusing? Are you going to believe her? Not that Cassie’s a liar, but you don’t know the context nor the exact words he used, and she doesn’t know what happened between you and him either.
“Should I go tell him something?” Olivia's already standing up, your silence not helping the situation.
“Just-" You don’t want to push him away, but it’s not the time to resolve this. The whole thing is too confusing to be making desperate decisions at this hour of the night, “Tell him to go have fun with the guys, I’m getting Cassie home.”
The loudest alarm you could’ve ever set up wakes you up with a jump. Your head hurts like your inside out emotions are building houses inside your skull. But the memories still hit you as soon as your eyelids burst open. Some decisions were definitely made the night before. Wrong ones? That’s to be seen today.
And thanks to the gods and Olivia’s always late waking family, you’re not supposed to be at the venue until 11 am. Only bad news, It’s on a luxury complex outside the city. You have time for a real breakfast and a shower, but all the thinking and feeling will have to wait.
You unlock your phone to find the last text conversation open and the messages you barely remember sending stare at you through the dim screen.
Mingyu: you left so suddenly
Mingyu: everything ok?
You: yeah
You: had to take Cass to her place, she wasn’t feeling well
Mingyu: that’s too bad, hope she feels better
Mingyu: you just got home?
You: yep, about to go to bed
Mingyu: great, just checking before i head to sleep
Mingyu: sleep well, big day tomorrow
Admittedly, you were a little dry. Cassie’s words were still lingering on your mind, making you doubt everything. One side of your brain telling you that he was probably talking about you, he explained what he felt and what he wanted and sounded sure and truthful. But, the other part of your brain, the still self-conscious and self-doubting side, also makes valid points. The void years in between your relationship weren’t mentioned in his confession, and you technically aren’t dating. He hasn’t even asked you out yet! It’s too conflicting. But you know you have to face both of them today. After the ceremony.
The taxi ride to the venue is not only long but full of traffic. The sun shining bright directly to your face, the light humming of the driver to the songs of the radio and the occasional car horn on the distance, somehow make it bearable, with all the thoughts about the previous night, switching sides between the he said she said, it’s nice to have something constant while your minds goes on a rollercoaster.
A rollercoaster that doesn’t stop even when you arrive. As soon as you step foot outside the car, Olivia’s mom rushes you upstairs to where the make-up artists set up. There’s no time to admire the beautiful countryside venue. You walk past the door to where the ceremony’s going to be held later, but rush up the stairs without even looking. The green dress already waiting for you at the door, an infinite echo of voices and even more people running around make the atmosphere feel dizzying.
Nothing slows down for even a second. Even when you’re sitting down having your make-up done, around you there’s only people rushing to do everything, stressing about the little details, people running into the room to tell Olivia or her mom about decorations, the wedding planner coming in and out constantly, checking everything’s in order. It’s kind of beautiful how all this mess has the sole purpose of making today the best day for the couple. Even if it doesn’t look like it, no one will remember the dress that wasn’t properly ironed, or the string of hair that had too much hairspray on it, or the too slippery shoes that made it a chore to walk on the tiled floor.
So much chaos happens between the hair and make-up, and then with the photoshoots, you don’t have time to talk to Mingyu. Your eyes would cross from time to time, but those milliseconds of him in a suit glaring at you from across the room are enough, and there’s so much of that you can take before an internal chain reaction begins.
The walk downstairs, after all the make-up retouches and fixes to any rebellious stray hair that didn’t want to stay in place, feels like the first calm and slow moment of the day. As the steps get closer and closer to the bottom floor, the red carpet muffling the clicking of your shoes, your insides feel fire-like when you see Mingyu waiting for you by the final step, an unknowing smile on his face. His eyes drill holes on your figure, scanning you up and down shamelessly.
“You chose this one, I like it.” He whispers by your ear as you walk to the door, where every pair is already waiting. A little smile shows on your face, but it fades when your eyes encounter Cassie’s, watching the two of you with a frown so little you only notice because she immediately relaxes her face.
The music starts before you can say anything to Mingyu, and one by one, each of the bridesmaids start walking down the aisle, arms linked with the groomsmen, gracefully walking forward as the eyes of every guest fall on them. Your arm tangled with his is the first touch you share since many days ago, and even with all the conflict making your mind a blur, your heart speeds up at the feeling of his muscles.
Nothing seems slow anymore, and the ceremony almost goes by without noticing. There isn’t one second where you don’t feel Mingyu’s eyes on you, making it impossible to focus – or pretend to focus – on what the priest is saying.
The moment your brain reconnects with your ears, Thomas delivers the most beautiful vows you’ve ever heard. You met the guy only once, never even spoken to him, but the way he speaks so fondly about Olivia makes your heart clutch in your chest, and your throat tries to fight it, but you end up bursting with tears. But you’re not the only one with a cascade of dramatic tears falling with seemingly no end. As the room fills with applause and even some whistles at the first kiss between the officially married couple, you see some people with tissues, quietly blowing their nose.
But the never-ending rush in time continues, everyone sprinting to sit at their tables for the reception. The last retouches of make-up get done quickly. The girls gossip to kill the time before the dance, because for them it’s moving so slowly, but in the blink of an eye, you’re going out the door once again, just as Cassie taps on your shoulder. You turn to her, expecting her to be angry, or at least to start speaking, but it looks like she’s still figuring out what to say.
“Thank you, for taking care of me last night, I’m sure you would’ve preferred to enjoy the party.”
“I wasn’t going to leave you alone, it’s fine, you don’t have to thank me. Are you feeling better?”
“Yeah, I am! But actually, I wanted to apologize.” Your head spins, dizzy from the world suddenly stopping hearing her words. “I didn’t know there was something going on between you two.”
“There’s not- I mean, not much happened, I didn’t want to cause a fuzz over it.”
“But you should’ve told me you liked him, at least! If I knew about it, I wouldn’t have gone after him.” You see in her eyes nothing but honesty. “I know we’re not as close as before, but these are the things we need to tell each other. It’s the girl code.”
“I don’t really know why I didn’t, I know I should’ve, I didn’t know how.” You’ve now started to go downstairs to the reception, already the time to dance in pairs.
“Look, it’s okay if you’re not comfortable telling me this, but did something happen? Was he talking about you last night?”
You’ve reached where everyone is waiting, and you’re too embarrassed to look up and possibly find Mingyu standing there, leg-melting and breathtaking.
“I thought about it but I don’t know, maybe?”
Back at the reception, the music starts, signaling the newlyweds are about to begin their first dance, meaning in no time you’ll have to step in and dance around them.
“I’m going to ask you three questions and you just have to answer yes or no. There's no need for explanation, okay?”
“O…Kay?”
“So, you two knew each other in school, did you like him?” You nod shyly, not looking in her eyes, embarrassed to be talking about this so openly, “Did he like you?” You nod again, “And did something happen recently that would indicate that he would like to date you in the near future?”
You give her a final nod and finally look up at her. She sighs, taking your hand and squeezing it to make you pay attention.
“Then he meant you dummy! Go, talk to him. He’s been staring at you all day like a lost puppy.”
When you dare to look his way, where you just knew he was standing, he’s looking at you, a little smirk on his lips and subtly motioning he's ready to take your hand. You didn’t notice it was already time, and everyone around you stands in their position.
The pairs start entering one by one, and your smile trembles, feeling the eyes of every guest on you. Your fingers barely graze his, but they feel raw, like you can feel every particle of his hand below yours. The electric fire emerging from where your skin connects with his runs through your veins in record time.
But as soon as the music starts and Mingyu turns you so you’re looking at him, everything is forgotten. The steps come easily, his eyes calm but observing, his hand on your waist guiding you as he did every time you practiced.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” He whispers, not wanting to disrupt the moment, but knowing it’s the only time you’ll get alone.
“I swear I didn’t mean to.”
You panic. There was so much to do and so few words you could come up with to say to him that maybe you unconsciously avoided him by locking yourself up in the make-up room.
“Did I do something wrong?” He doesn’t sound hurt, but rather just plain curious, eager to work this out between you two.
“No! it was just a misunderstanding,” he waits for you to continue, but the part of your brain that makes sense starts crumbling, making it impossible to form a coherent argument, “I- can I ask you something? It might sound stupid, I’m warning you.”
“Go ahead.” He chuckles, his feet continuing to dance while you've already forgotten about it. One of your hands stays on his shoulder, while the other is being held by him, still in the air by your sides, reaching the height of your shoulders.
“You’re not dating anyone, are you?”
He doesn’t let the silence even come close to the two of you, chuckling quietly so you’re the only one who can hear it.
“I’m not, hard to believe I know, but I’m painfully single.”
“Great, I just wanted to make sure.”
“I remember telling you I want to take you on a date.”
“Y-yeah, of course I remember that too."
The pit of your stomach lights up at the remainder of that afternoon in his home, your bodies as close as they are at this moment.
“Then what made you think that?”
“You just, you said to Cassie last night that you started seeing someone recently and, I don’t know, we didn’t technically start dating, so I panicked.” Saying it out loud to him, it sounds ridiculous, but if he thinks that, he doesn’t show it.
“Oh that, yeah, I might’ve gotten ahead of myself, but hey, think of it as manifesting.” He’s so charming that you don’t care that he’s making no sense.
“Next time, don’t tell a drunk girl who’s flirting with you the wrong information. She might spread it around.”
The synchronized chuckle you let out makes you pay attention to the forgotten situation. You’re dancing and haven’t tripped once, like your muscles got a life of their own and remembered every single step. And you suddenly realize how close your body is to Mingyu’s. One hand down the small of your back, pressing just enough to hold you in his personal space, his face close enough that you could concentrate on his breathing and feel the light exhales on your face.
When the music ends, the applause makes you look around, and your cheeks feel warm immediately, noticing all the eyes on every one of you. But the attention is short-lived, as you and Mingyu walk quickly to your table so the couple can do the welcome toasts. You don't miss how he slides your chair closer to his before you sit down.
Sitting by your side, Mingyu’s body and yours are connected by an electric current, drawing you closer. His knee stays glued to yours, and the cut on the side of your dress allows your bare skin to brush against the fabric of his pants. A conversation takes place between everyone at the table, one of the guys telling a story about something funny that happened with Tom back in high-school, but it’s hard to pay any real attention when Mingyu’s fingers start tracing circles on your knee. He’s not even doing to be a tease. It seems like it’s a habit of his, one that you’re just discovering. You don’t stop your fingers from playing with his, and a subtle smirk forms on his lips at your action.
It’s not like you’re doing anything too flashy or indecent, but you do your best to mask your reactions to his touches, to try and keep the people of the table unaware of the not so innocent things going on under the fancy tablecloth. He only notices your changes because he’s paying attention to you. The way your chest rises just a tad bit more when his hand goes a little over your knee, or how you drink from your cold glass of water when he presses on the skin of your inner thigh, but when he’s about to move his hand off of you, you put yours on his to keep it in place. You also notice things throughout the night, for example, that Mingyu isn’t drinking a lot, restricting to one glass of champagne per serving. You do the same, wanting to remember this night in the future.
Mingyu stands up when the dancefloor opens again, turning down an offer to go to the bar for something stronger than sparkling wine. Instead, he reaches for your hand, silently inviting you to dance with him, to which you agree, with a smile and avoiding his eyes. Following behind him, he doesn’t let go of your hand, even when you’ve reached the spot he wanted. People join you on the dancefloor, drunkenly vibing to the dj set, surrounding you, and blocking you from anyone you know. It’s feels almost private. Whatever song is playing on the speakers, it doesn’t prevent you from following your own rhythm in your own world. Your arms wrap around Mingyu’s neck, and both of his hands hold your waist, mirroring the evening at his place.
“So, tell me, what other embarrassing things did you do when you liked me?”
He throws his head back in embarrassment, sighing with a smile before daring to look at you again. His ears turn a light shade of pink, and you swear you can feel his heartbeat between your bodies.
“I really told you that, did I? I was hoping you wouldn't remember.”
“Nope, I remember it very vividly actually.”
“Let’s leave the embarrassing stories for the future, I wasn’t in my best condition last night.”
“You’re making me too curious now, but how drunk did you get last night?”
“Honestly, I was just nervous about seeing you and about tonight.” He might be confessing another embarrassing thing, but behind his truthful tone, there’s something you can’t quite decipher.
“What’s there to be nervous about tonight?”
Your heels allow you to be in his line of sight, and your chests are too close. If you inhaled deeply, you’d be able to feel him on you. He takes advantage of your new height and forces your attention to go to his lips, smirking shamelessly as he thinks his next words.
“Did I tell you how pretty you look today?"
One hand comes close to your face, removes a strand of hair from blocking your view, and tucks it behind your ear.
“Oh, shut up.”
You can’t even think of a snarky response, your brain melting and showing just how much he affects you. Goosebumps spread all across your arms and back at the feel of his hand caressing your skin.
“I can’t, it’s all I’ve thinking about all day, you, this dress, and you in this dress.”
You instinctively hide your face on the crook of his neck, his cologne invading your senses. It’s hard to think of words when he’s looking at you like he wants to eat you whole.
“I got it because of you. Do you really like it?”
Not that you need any confirmation, since he’s told you twice already, but it wouldn’t hurt to hear it from him one more time. Your reveal makes his smirking lips graze your ear, sending shivers down your spine, and his voice drops an octave to answer.
“I love the dress, but I’ll love it more once I get it off you.”
“I hate you.”
You barely manage to say, your chest rising but breathless at the same time. Your body’s automatic reaction is to push him away, and your hands go straight to his chest to try, but of course it’s pointless. His hands catch yours, not letting you leave his personal space. He taunts you by spinning you around, and once you do a full twirl, he grabs you by the waist again and brings your body to his.
“You have no idea how hard it was for me that day when you stepped out, wearing this.” He gets closer to your ear with every word. You hate it and love it. For one, you can hide from his teasing eyes and blush in peace, but on the other hand, you are cheek to cheek with him, his breath fanning lightly on your side, and you can feel he’s still smirking. “You’re lucky there were other people in the room.”
A breath catches in your throat, and you swallow hard. You thank all the gods there are out there for being surrounded by drunk people. Because to anyone on their senses, your reaction to Mingyu's words would be too obvious.
“I really hate you right now.”
It’s getting harder and harder to ignore the heat growing at the pit of your stomach.
“You don’t.”
“I do.”
“I think it’s quite the opposite actually.”
How are you supposed to play hard to get when his hands hold you like he wants to keep you forever?
“You think you know everything.”
You catch your voice about to tremble when his free hand starts going down the side of your arm, from your shoulder down until your hand, and interlocks his fingers with yours.
“If you hate me then, I can’t tell you the secret I’ve been keeping all night.”
“Have you been secretly writing an article about how to break someone’s heart in 10 days?”
“I love that movie, but it has been well over 10 days, I couldn’t make the deadline.”
“Rom-com connoisseur, noted.” You jokingly nod, but not forgetting what’s important. “Now tell me.”
“So, you know how they told us there were rooms available for anyone that couldn't drive home?” You nod, too enthusiastically. “I may or may not have booked one for tonight, and if you want to, there’s space for one more, we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to…” He keeps talking, something about you watching him do something, but you get lost in the way his lips move as he talks, so pink and fast and hypnotizing.
“Isn’t it rude to just leave?”
The question leaves your mouth more to tease him than anything else. You want to be alone with him so badly, feel his body all over yours, his hands everywhere he can reach, ripping this godforsaken dress off you.
Before the last food serving rolls out and everyone scatters to go back to their seat, you sneak out of the reception, but the drunk bodies are not making it easy. Mingyu leads the way with you grabbing his hand and walking behind him. You don’t know if you could’ve managed another teasing touching session under the table.
You take a left turn into the hallway just at the same time as one of Olivia's drunk uncles, a stranger to the both of you, who’s half asleep using the wall to steady himself as he walks. The music echoes through the walls, and you can only look at each other, half about to burst out laughing and half needing to take the others clothes off, as you walk as nonchalantly as possible past the man trying his best to open his door.
Giggling like teenagers, you finally reach your room at the end of the hallway, but the second you enter, the atmosphere changes. Standing by the closed door, shoes off, panting, and frozen in place, you only look at each other. Your breaths regulate, and your smiles slowly fade off your expressions as the realization hits. It’s real. He’s here, and you’re here, in a room just for the two of you. His eyes are bound to your parted lips, but you wouldn’t know, as yours are also unable to leave his.
Like magnets, brutally drawn to each other, your lips finally reconnect in a hungry, desperate kiss. After learning how sweet he tastes, how his lips glide over yours so easily, how he wraps his arms around you to keep you close to him, there was only so much time you could spend in abstinence.
No words needed, the want translating in the way your hands push him against you, his hands traveling across your back, touching and groping everywhere he can reach. After the long day testing your patience, neither of you can slow down.
His fang claws at your bottom lip, making you whimper against him. He drinks in any sound you make, his arms bringing your body impossibly closer to his, almost making you one. No one is in control, both of you just touching and grabbing anywhere you can, desperate for more.
Your mouths reluctantly separate as Mingyu starts leaving a trail of kisses down your neck and biting lightly on your sensitive skin, making you gasp. You can only thread your fingers on his hair, encouraging him to leave any marks he wishes to.
“Is this okay?”
His raspy voice travels to your ears, and you don’t trust yourself to not make unholy noises if you open your mouth to answer. But just as you’re humming, he digs his teeth just above your clavicle, turning your hum into a moan.
He slowly slides the straps of your dress down your shoulders, his fingers teasing your skin on the way down. His hand travels across your chest, only the silky green fabric in between your fiery skin and his teasing fingers. They go over your pointy hard nipples, feeling everything on its way, but not letting it stay anywhere for more than a second.
“Are you going to take it off?”
Your breathlessness makes him chuckle, smug and cocky as ever.
“Rushed?”
“Very. You’re the one that put the thought in my head, now take care of it!” His hands sneak up your back, playing with the zipper of your dress.
“Don’t act so innocent.” His tone goes straight to your core. The fabric around you loosens up as his hand runs down your spine, but he stops before it gets too loose to slip down. “You think I didn’t see the way you looked at me all day? You’re not slick.”
He takes a step back to take off his suit jacket, absentmindedly throwing it to the side without breaking eye contact. But you don't let yourself get shy.
“Who said I was trying to hide it?”
Your hands run from his shoulders to his chest, unbuttoning his shirt one by one as his breathing speeds up. The warmth of his body envelops your hands, your fingers barely grazing the skin above his pants, and his muscles tense at your touch before you slip his shirt off.
“Now who’s the one teasing?”
Pulling on the red tie around his neck, he swallows hard as you bring his head closer to yours, so close you unconsciously flutter your eyes closed. His bare chest rises against yours as you undo his tie slowly. You could tilt your chin up and break the tension once more, but something in you wants to keep teasing him.
A step back is all you need to have his lips chase you, and he opens his eyes, droopy and confused, to find you slipping your dress off. His stare turns surprised and hungry as you reveal yourself for him, but his body stays frozen in place.
“I’m supposed to do that.”
It’s your time to chuckle now, taking a step forward again. His hands slot on your waist instinctively, traveling to your stomach, enjoying the feeling of your soft skin against his hands.
“You’ll get to do it next time.” The sentence is almost left unfinished, a breath getting caught in your throat when his hands dare go up your chest. But they’re gone in a heartbeat, as they reach your face and tilt it so you can properly look at him.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” No teasing tone on his voice.
“I’m literally naked in front of you.” Your hands go back up to his neck, pushing his head slightly down, reaching a hypnotic closeness. “I want this, I want you Mingyu.”
Confirmation is all he needed to let loose, to let the want take over his body and soul. He connects your lips with force, and wastes no time. With his hands on your ass and his tongue working its way inside your mouth, he stumbles backwards until you both fall on the bed.
With you on top of Mingyu, your hands make their way across his chest, his golden skin glistening due to the sweat. You can feel his hard muscles tense under your touch, making him sigh on your mouth when you find his sensitive spots. His hands move to your hips and push you down on him, making you both moan un unison because of the first friction between your cores.
His growing hard grinds deliciously against you. Even with his pants still between you, you can feel how big he is, and the wet patch on your panties grows by the second. Your lips are still smashed together, a mess of saliva allowing your lips you glide faster and hungrier on his, your tongues becoming one, not wanting to separate ever again.
Your hands find their way down his abdomen, reaching where his pants hang on his hips. The absence of a belt makes it easier for you to unbutton them, and he takes the off expertly, all without ever taking his hands off you.
The second your hand sneaks under his underwear, he groans under you, disconnecting your mouths to take a look at you.
“Is it embarrassing to be already close?” His blood red lips are parted, breathing out his confession, and you almost moan, clenching around nothing because of the sight, or his confession, or maybe the whimper he fights when you wrap your hand around him.
“You’re so big, fuck.” You sigh, and the side of his mouth quirks up, but slowly disappears as you start sliding your hand down, smearing the precum on his length.
“I’m not gonna hurt you.”
His eyes have a mix of concern and lust on them, and your body doesn’t know how to react, your stomach flips, your hands tremble, and your underwear grows wetter.
“I know you won’t.”
You climb down on him, your eyesight reaching where his boxers begin to tent. His gaze follows you, like he can’t believe the reality of what’s happening. You take off the last piece of clothing left on his body, and his dick springs free, standing proud and angry red in front of your eyes. The throb on your throat makes you move forward, wrapping your lips around his leaking tip.
“Wait. Don’t.” You look up at him but he’s facing the ceiling, ears red and eyes closed. “I can’t.”
“I haven’t done anything.” You play innocent, and a smirk appears on your face when he finally looks at you, resting on his elbows.
“Exactly, that’s why I can’t, I need to have a little bit of pride left.”
“What do you suggest we do?” You slowly climb up on him again, his hands moving to your hips like they got a life of their own. One hand on his chest and one hand on his jaw, you kiss him softly, and he melts at your touch.
A soft moan is heard, could be from him, could be from you, but your mind is too clouded to care when he rolls his hips against yours, following the pace of your lazy kiss. A rush of arousal takes over your body when he presses you harder against him, his length sliding perfectly with your core, your wetness making it easier to reach every point that makes you gasp.
“I want,” his lips stop working on yours, but his arms keep you from separating. You feel his every breath, every gasp at the friction, and his lips graze yours when he speaks, “I want to taste you.”
“Fuck.” He might just be able to feel the new rush of wetness dampening your panties further and smearing around his hard below you. His hands push your hips up his body. He told you what he wants, and he’s showing you exactly how he wants it. “Are you sure? I don’t want to crush your skull.”
“I wouldn’t mind that, at least I’d die happy.”
“Well, I can’t argue with that if you want it.”
The chuckle he lets out reverberates from his chest up through your whole body. There’s not much you can do besides complying with his wants, especially with the way your body’s reacting to the sole idea of it and the way he’s moving you to where he wants.
His hands sneak under the strings of your underwear, and as you climb higher and higher, he removes them easily, leaving you bare on top of him.
“You’re so wet, shit.” Your pussy pulsates just above his face. You can’t see his reaction, but you for sure can hear it, “I would’ve done this sooner if I knew this was waiting for me.”
From your point of view, his whole face is covered, by you, on top of him, only his messy hair laying on the mattress can be seen. A view that’s dizzying and hypnotic at the same time, and you can’t think of any answer to give him. His breath on your wet core makes you shiver, but you’re afraid to sit down, afraid you’ll hurt him.
Mingyu senses your hesitation and gives you no more time to doubt. His head rises until his tongue meets your folds, flattening on you, desperate to make you feel good. The sudden stimulation makes your legs tremble, and you would've fell on his face if it wasn’t from his hands still holding your hips.
He starts making out with your cunt, moaning and groaning against it like this is also pleasurable for him. His tongue finds every place that makes you gasp, moan and whimper, and with every lap at your folds, a nasty wet sound accompanies it.
A shaky moan escapes out of you when he envelops your clit with his lips and sucks lightly, making you grab the headboard so you don’t fall on him.
You must’ve fully sit on his mouth in your search for support, because he moans louder against your pussy, and you can feel everything. His lips and tongue working to drink every drop of arousal that leaves you, discovering every sensitive spot you didn’t know about.
The tip of his nose bumps your clit just as his tongue finds its way inside your pulsing hole, and you instinctively move your hand down to pull at his hair. The action encourages him to go faster, harder, and when you grind on his face and he groans like he’s enjoying it, you let go.
Riding him, chasing your high, you’re using his tongue for your own pleasure. Your hand on his hair tightens, and you lose the little control you had of your throat. But the unfiltered sounds you make just push him harder. Every one of your senses is clouded. The wet sounds, the way he moans against you, his tongue already knowing where to go to make you squirm, everything culminates without warning.
You cum on his tongue faster than you have ever before. Your thighs tremble at either side of his head, and you realize you’re crushing him between them. But he doesn't let you get up. His tongue continues to work on you,
He cleans you up, drinking every last drop of arousal smeared on your skin. You spasm over him every time he –not so accidentally– flicks your clit with the tip of his tongue, starting to get you overstimulated.
You use the strength you have left to push his head back, and take advantage of his surprise to plop down on his side, your back on the mattress and your pussy finally away of his eager mouth.
“Are you okay?”
From the corner of your eye, while you try to recover, you see Mingyu doing his best to clean the lower side of his face.
“Yeah, fuck, that was a lot.” You manage to say in between breaths. “I need a second.”
“If you’re too tired, we can st- fuck.”
You don’t give time to overthink, quickly getting on top of him again, your swollen dripping cunt right on top of his still hard cock.
“Second's over.” Only a little smirk is the warning he gets before you’re grinding on top of him again. All of your juices mix as you slowly ride back and forth, his length sliding between your wet folds deliciously. “I’m clean, and on the pill, are you?”
“On the pill? Unfortunately not.” How he manages to make you laugh even on your horniest moments will forever remain a mystery. “But I’m clean, I’ve never had sex without a condom before.”
“Me neither. I guess this will be a new experience for the both of us.” The sole thought of it makes his dick twitch under you.
“Are you sure?” His hand cups the side of your face, and his eyes look at you with such care that you could melt in an instant.
“Yes, I don’t want to wait anymore. We’ve waited long enough.” That seems to relax him, his hands beginning to roam freely across your torso.
Sliding forward makes the veins of his cock drag along every sensitive spot and you both moan before his tip finally prods at your entrance. A loud hiss comes out of him as you align yourself with his length and push his tip in.
But before you can go any further, he wraps his arms around your waist and turns you around so your back is against the mattress. You gasp at the sudden change, and when he starts slowly sinking into you, filling every possible space inside you, you lose your breath.
His cock being covered by your fluids makes it easier, and when he finally bottoms out, so deep you feel him everywhere, you hear him trying to muffle a moan. Your gummy walls clamp around him, trying to get used to his size. The twitch of his length feels stronger while inside you, and you know he’s trying to resist the urge to pound into you.
“Move, please, I need you.” Your pathetic whimper triggers another smirk out of him, and as he moves down to give you a soft kiss, his eyes darken.
“Whatever my girl wants.”
The slow drag of his cock as he starts sliding it out almost make you delirious, but before his tip slips out, he snaps his full length right back in, making your body jolt upwards. You can't speak properly, a curse you can’t even hear leaves your mouth before he repeats the action, again and again.
“So deep, Mingyu, fuck.” The brutal pace he sets has him abusing every single sensitive spot inside you, even the ones you didn’t know about, hitting relentlessly where it makes you scream, and you’re seeing stars.
“You don’t say my name often,” his voice is raspy and deep, almost mirroring the way his cock pistons inside of you, “I like how it sounds coming out of you."
Your palms are against the headboard and you’re sure the bed hitting against the wall can be heard from other rooms, but when one of his hands sneak between your bodies and starts circling your clit, you stop caring all along.
The grinding of your hips matches his rhythm, accentuating everything as he drives you closer and closer. With his face just above yours, you can only look him in the eyes and let him watch your face contort in pleasure feeling every vein of his cock dragging inside of you. With any other person, you would be self-conscious, but as he finds that spot inside you that makes you squirm, you forget the world around you and focus on grabbing his strong arms for support.
His teeth find your neck again, biting and kissing on your soft skin, pushing you closer and closer to the edge, and he doesn’t stop drilling his hips into you. Somehow, you feel him deeper with every thrust, and the only thing you can do is claw your nails on his arms and back, encouraging him more and more.
“You’re so tight, shit.” His hips stutter when you clench hearing his voice. “Tell me you’re close, please, fuck, I don’t now how long I got."
“Yes! Yes, don’t stop.” You tighten impossibly harder around him when you feel him pinch one of your nipples. He’s literally everywhere, stimulating every spot to tip you over the edge.
Your arms and legs cage his body so close to yours that he has trouble keeping up with his pace, but that doesn't stop him from pounding hard. The sound of skin your skin hitting against his and his groans are like music to your ears.
It's when his thumb teases your clit again that you finally snap.
You tremble around him, moaning uncontrollably as he keeps pounding into you, prolonging your orgasm as he pleases and chasing his own. But he’s far gone too. Your sweet moans in his ear and your walls clenching around him so perfectly are enough to have him spilling inside you.
Sleepiness is about to get you when you feel him sliding out you and plopping by your side. Naturally, one of his arms slots under you as your head rests on the crook of his neck.
There’s silence while you both catch your breaths, his hand softly drawing circles on your back and yours on his chest. As reality sinks in, giddiness fills your entire body, and you can’t contain the smile growing against his golden skin.
“Did you do any embarrassing things back then?” The sudden interrogation makes your cheeks turn red.
“I’m guessing there’s no way out of this, right?” You avoid looking up at him to not make your shyness obvious, and you feel him shake his head as an answer. “Fine… you know… your fangs?”
“My fangs?!” Amusement and surprise mix on his voice.
“Fuck this is so embarrassing.” You’re caged between his arms but you manage to cover your face with your hands.
“You liked my fangs?”
“I still do, but yeah, I would just draw little fangs everywhere, I guess no one ever noticed because they looked more like vamp–"
“Would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow?” He luckily interrupts your embarrassing rant with his pending question.
“Already? You want to see me again that badly?” You feel the chuckle on his chest before you hear it, and at that moment, it’s the best sound you’ve ever heard.
“I plan on taking you on dates at least three times a week. You’re never getting rid of me now.” He embraces you in his arms, chests flushed together, and when you tilt your head up, he’s already looking at you, expectant for your answer. “So, what do you say?”
“Yes, I would love to have dinner with you tomorrow.” The smile he gives you might be the most blinding smile you’ve ever seen. “But just so you know, I do not have sex on first dates.”
thank you so much for reading♥♥ sorry this took so long to finish
#mingyu au#seventeen au#seventeen smut#mingyu smut#svt smut#kim mingyu au#svt au#kim mingyu smut#mingyu imagine#mingyu x reader
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cold kisses
part 0.5. PINK DYE
PLAYING FROM KODZUKEN'S STREAM . . . i hope that you think of me by pity part (girls club)
prev. | m.list | next
extras <3
y/n woke up early and decided to text kenma immediately bc she was feeling a little nervous about everything
suna and iwa told her to ask casual so she was trying so hard to act normal she maybe failed a little
in her defense kenma also wasn't helping with how monotone he was and then a sudden smiley face bc kuroo saw that they were texting and immediately scolded him saying "why do you text like you've never experienced an emotion in your life? you need smiley faces or something"
kenma bought y/n flowers when they went out for coffee playing it off as "i thought it'd be cool to take a picture with"
he didn't even expect y/n to take a picture since nothing had really been released on her side about a boyfriend yet but she thought he was so sweet and wanted to post it anyway
kenma trying to be romantic and noya's i feel so sigma on the same page killed me for some reason
like two (2) people asked atsumu how working with y/n was and he took it as "i must tell the people how i feel about her and shoot my shot"
no ukai really didn't have to be in here but i love him okay i love my pretty princess and i wanted him in here as someone's father please tolerate me
ukai is the kind of guy that drops dad lore at the most random times like you'll be talking about something and then he's suddenly like "oh the stanley hotel? yeah i worked there for a few years 😐" (real story a drama teacher has dropped on me)
and the only way anyone can respond is "ukai ur a coach when did u have the time to work at the stanley hotel and why did u quit"
taglist: @rinheartshyunlix @kettlepop @eggyrocks @cr4yolaas @httpakkeiji @keioover @does-directions @calx-bdo @staygoldsquatchling02 @cherrypieyourface @iluv-ace @kitty-m30w @h3xi2g0n3 @mylahrins @thechaosoflonging @momoriii-i @localgaytrainwreck @a-pastel-edgelord @bugglesboop @polish-cereal @osakis-gf @whykirbo @phoenix-eclipses @faesix @ryeyeyer @starxq.zip @skylarkalchemist @kunimix @sereniteav @kodzubaby @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @r0seandth0rns @gysche @1lovestrawberrymilk @kitnootkat @seillarium @tamimemo @iheartpinky @myromanempiree @coldcigarette @eclipticnikki @squiishymeow @vivian-555 @cryptictheseus (form to be added to taglist! <3)
#kozume kenma#kenma kozume#kenma#kenma x reader#kenma smau#haiykuu smau#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#hq#hq x reader#ness' planet ⋆⭒˚.⋆
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Day 25 ~ I'll protect you from ghosts ~ Hallowtober
James Heathridge x wife!reader
warning: comfort, kissing, mention of murder
Summary: It wasn't over yet he still needed one more victim, just one more and he would finally finish the task. But in all this time, he had never been able to see the ghosts of the past properly, but the victims haunted his wife and not him on those horrible nights. All the more reason to face up to the past and embrace your fear instead of just looking for a knife in your hand.
info: James, James, James my sweet little murderer James, it wouldn't be a real October without Halloween and James Heathridge.
masterlist
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She always knew that James was something special, from the moment she saw him in the craft and painting shop, his eyes on the oil pastel colors, a few new canvases and the few fabrics they also offered.
He was someone who came irregularly and yet always came back, who seemed to greet her only but didn't greet anyone else.
She was something special to him, something she didn't know until the night he seemed almost annoyed, moving faster than usual, and at the checkout when she handed him his bag, he said, ,,I wish such beauty a pleasant night” and left.
But at the end of her story, when she had seen the paper with his number on it and she had decided to do it on this cool October evening and call him, she never would have thought that a year later she would be staying in his house forever.
She didn't want to leave him, not after he had shown her the concept of true, unconditional love, someone who seemed so incredibly close and yet so far away, an angel, a devil, her love for him and his for her.
This house, which seemed perfectly inconspicuous from the outside, was old and perhaps a bit dilapidated… but the inside was something she couldn't stand, especially at night.
When she slept next to James, took him into bed with her, and his hands never let go, he murmured in his sleep and she couldn't leave him, she seemed to hear his crying and screaming, as if the house were almost alive.
,,You seem tense,” he said at some point when he came to her, his cool hands running along her arms, and she almost dropped her cup of coffee, a sentence that made her shake her head.
The brown-haired man had seen how distraught she sometimes seemed, not a little because of him, so he had feared, but she had assured him that it was not him.
His heart wouldn't have taken it if he were the cause of her unease, even if she never needed him more than when she was like his own mother, he loved her with all his heart.
,,Tense up? James… it's the house, not you or your sister or your beloved mother… something will come for me,” she had said, and there was fear in her eyes, a fear that reminded James of the situations in which he saw such fear when water and blood and stains and he finally his darling had somehow guessed it, and yet… what could he do?
A question that was still an hour between them when she wrote at the typewriter, the typing kept coming ,,James, they're coming for me!” she screamed, immediately feeling his arms around her as he pulled her behind him, protecting her, hatred flashing in his bluish eyes as he shouted at the house to leave her alone and she pressed her head against his chest to be as close to him as possible.
His hand settled on her cheek, ,,Nothing will be promised to you,” he gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead, which only calmed her down, and she clung to his shirt with her trembling hands as she dared not leave him, still hearing the screams and sounds of crying mixed with the sweet smell of the tea he made to calm her down. She drank it, gently lifting the cup to her lips.
,,That's it, darling, just calm your mind for now and I'll finish it,” he said, stroking her back reassuringly while the audio player played a slow song that seemed to feature violins.
It was only when her soul mate, her husband, her heart, her lover, disappeared into the cellar for hours, she heard metal noises and crying, tears welled up in her eyes and she almost screamed when the door to their shared bedroom opened and she saw a relieved James, she knew it was probably over. Gone forever.
,,I'll protect you from anything, my dear. Nothing and no one will come for you but me. No one will take you away from here, I promise,” he said, took a dark blanket and sat down on the bed next to her, wrapped her in the crocheted blanket and let her snuggle up to him to calm down.
He heard her murmur, ,,Thank you, my James,” and he reached for her hand, leaving a few gentle kisses there to calm her further, kissing each of her soft fingers individually.
She leaned more and more against him while the house was quiet and he noticed that she became calm and tamed until she slowly fell asleep and for the first time in weeks was not haunted by ghosts but by the love and desire of her James, who would always be at her side when she needed him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
#hallowtober#criminal minds#criminal minds james heathridge#james heathridge#kyle gallner#james heathridge x reader
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You know what is funny? I wouldn't really describe the loose flippy skater skirts or ruffle skirts like the popflex one as being skirts that fit someone "like skin". But the tight, short, body con skirts that were in fashion around, say . . . 2013? Now those I would absolutely describe that way, and Taylor just so happened to be really into them.
Getting close to pre-Kaylor territory here, but what if imgonnagetyouback is not a revenge / reunion story after an epic break-up, but more . . . "the one who got away, and won't get away again". What if the first half of the song is from the pov of 2013, Wildest Dreams era Taylor who felt like love was doomed and loving her would probably wreck the other person's life . . . and then from "push the reset button" we see how that kind of played out, but mostly only in the form of PR games. Because the reality is "you were never not mine".
(I can't people still insist there was a break up. Come on, guys. She can't even sing about it with a straight face 😂 She's sneaking the truth in right under your nose!)
yeah well you know me, i’ve thought about this a little bit myself, and i think a lot can be finessed about that time period, so you’re bringing up an interesting thought for sure.. and i agree the line juxtaposed with the popflex skirt felt like an immediate puzzle to me 😆 as for your timeframe, incidentally when i first heard the song i couldn’t help but think about this mid 2013 look july 30th to be exact). while not a pastel lilac nor a skirt, it was quite bodycon. like much of her victoria’s secret attire 😌 i definitely get what you’re saying about the early 2010’s being a short skirt that fits you like skin era
and when taylor played the imgonnagetyouback and dress mashup, it did make me think about the similarities between the lines “only bought this dress” and “you knew the price going in” and while the latter is also a play on the idea that there is a metaphorical price to pay for dating taylor or for taylor to do certain things with her life, i also think the sort of basic… fashion… buying fashion.. wearing clothes.. theming is so classically kaylor. like early stage kaylor songs with lyrics like “you try on calling me baby like trying on clothes” etc. and my mind wandered further and it made me think about the lilac-y wings behind taylor during her dress performances at rep tour, yeah 😌
actually it had me thinking about bodycon fashion in general and how it keeps coming back. like before it’s moment as the business casual club wear that early 2010’s millennials knew and loved, it was popularized in the early 90’s.
that sort of come-back-stronger-than-a-90s-trend, come-back-every-time energy that feels so central to the kaylor story.
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My dahling, you asked for a Rhett Abbott thought?? Maybe some thots in between?? (lol).
Spring is your favorite time of year with Rhett because the land around your house literally looks like The Shire. When you were building your dream home, Rhett kept asking if you could build a hobbit hole instead of renovating the place you got (lol). But the place is just as cozy and maybe more so.
It's old but you and Rhett make it your own. There's always some house plants in the windowsills and plenty of wide windows to let in the sunlight. The house is all full of wood and stone and the kitchen window has the pretty little yellow gingham curtains that Cecelia's mom made. Near the stairs is the old Swiss grandfather clock that Royal's mother brought with her from Switzerland after WWII (I'll have to send you the story I have for Oma Heidi, I cried while writing it) and in the living room is an old rocking chair that Royal's grandfather had made in the 1920s. Most of the other stuff is antiques that you guys have come across at the stores and shops downtown with Rhett and Royal having spent hours in Royal's woodshop restoring them.
You and Rhett love when spring comes because you can pack away all the heavy winter flannels and duvets and put out the ones for spring and summer. They're all soft pastel yellows, greens, purples and blues that you've collected and made over the years. You even taught Rhett how to knit and how to crochet even though he still insists his hands are too clumsy for it. You've made and fixed his shirts so many times that he's lost count and he always gives you "the look" whenever you give him a little twirl to show off the new dress or outfit you've made.
Your house has also become the ranch's unofficial animal hospital and nursery for the baby animals and strays. So far the nursery consists of Timothy, a little field mouse that was found in the chicken feed sack with a broken leg (Royal made him a tiny little leg splint from a toothpick, lol), Bambi, a little female dairy calf, Wilbur, the piglet who was the runt of the litter and needed to be bottle fed, Pinky and Alberto, a male and female chihuahua pair that Rhett found in an alley outside the Wabang General Store and Hazel and Clover, two little cream colored bunny rabbits that had escaped from a hoarder farm. One of the toughest yet was Chewie, a setter-spaniel mutt who's owner had given up on him because of a growth that had gotten really big on his mouth. You and Rhett immediately took him to the vet and had the growth removed and in no time at all, Chewie was eating again and had become your unofficial helper in the field when he had healed. And it's thanks to his sharp nose too that you and Rhett never have any trouble with pests or unexpected visits from your animal neighbors.
I may have to do a part two to this my dear because there's so much to go through (lol).
Stop, the animal hospital and nursery?! I’ll cry 🥺 I’ve been weeping over every animal video I’ve seen lately! Timothy the field mouse with the broken leg?! My heart can’t take it!
Ugh, I just want to live this simple, sweet little life with Rhett ♥️
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GET TO KNOW THE MUN !
what made you pick up the muse you have ? : my friend typecasted my muse type when the victims concept art was announced. just immediately pointed out the horror jock like yep. that'll be the one u like. and then i played the tcsm beta back in may me and rae started wildly theorycrafting.... and well my demons have been winning since. i love a jock who is kind of fail but trying his best like you got me there.
is there anything you really enjoy writing ? : i'm a creep i'm a weirdo i love exploring horror and the many themes that can coexist in it. ig i like to kind of examine trauma and the healing process through the lens of the slasher genre, as well as where horror and love coincide as themes. i think there is underrepresentation in just....... letting slasher final kids have some kind of healing arc, or letting their story continue in general? seeing them before and after the things that happen to them? and i can't always do it but i do also like to kind of dive down into slasher horror and light gore and just practicing writing dynamic action scenes and what a character's thought process is like during those kinds of moments. i love an opportunity to be mean to my blorbo
is there anything you don't like to write ? : probably just anything needlessly like... melodramatic between characters? i have no interest in plots like genuine jealousy and love triangles and interpersonal shit like that, mostly because i write horror and there are so many more interesting things to focus on imo? and because not enough slasher content casts seem like they actually care about each other lmaooo. is this a callout post about gun.'s take on the friend group? perhaps.
how do you come up with your headcanons ? : dude i just receive the prophecies and act like im on twitter tossing my every stupid thought into the void.
do you write in silence or listen to music ? : tbh i usually write either in silence or in a deranged third way (writing between games of overwatch) my adhd sometimes demands that i am doing several things at the same time and sometimes i can sit down at the coffee shop put on some instrumentals and just slam some replies in
do you plan your replies or wing them ? : hmmm a bit of both? i usually have to start by winging it, which usually involves me dropping in whatever reaction dialogue immediately comes to me. kind of work around that, save and close the draft, and then think about the reply a bit until i eventually know where i'm going with it LOL
do you enjoy shipping ? : i do with friends! i'm not actually a huge like... ships person in a general fandom sense and i rarely feel any particular way until something is compelling to me in fanon, but i can ship most things if it's with a writing partner i like! simply ask rae we will be creating ships 0 people are thinking about shout out leland/connie tcsm tommy/jenny f13 and jake/adam dbd. i also usually go hard on the slowburn, and that's just like, personal comfort for getting to know my muse and my writing partner's muse, but also just think slowburn rules
what's your alias / name ? : kels.
zodiac sign ? : pisces sun, gemini moon, aries rising.
Birthday? : march 20th!
favorite color ? : a sort of pastel pink-lilac
favorite song ? : feel that it must be go your own way / fleetwood mac
last movie you watched ? : oh jesus i fear it was hellraiser: revelations
last show you watched ? : icr if it was an episode of goosebumps or true detective tbh
last song you listened to ? : putting the dog to sleep by the antlers....
favorite food ? : veggie burritos probably. or honestly like. just a really good bagel cream cheese LMFAO
favorite season ? : spring (:
do you have a tumblr best friend ? : rae and i have been in and out of these trenches for years i fear
TAGGED BY : @solarisgod thank u!!! mwah mwah <3
TAGGING : all my fellas
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Turned a popular color/species combo into the most controversial pet and 100x happier for it.
My title is a joke lol, but whew! SleepingBeast got a MASSIVE overhaul and I’m so happy with her now!!
For those who may remember, she’s been through a LOT. I created her a few years ago (4 or 5 now?) because I saw that the title to a song from my favorite band was free and I figured it would be a cool name to have, but I had 0 direction for her. She was a fire Xweetok for years but I had no clue how to customize her. I also didn’t want to give her up though, especially because I’d only have wanted her to go to someone who loved the band/song haha. So she eventually became a lab rat and after a little while of nothing became a pastel Aisha.
Now, I know this is sacrilegious to some, but I’m not really an Aisha fan. But this was back when pastel was one of the most, if not THE most, expensive PB colors on the site, way before it was a weekly quest prize and the cost went down to something affordable (though to my knowledge still a pretty coveted/desirable color for its customization potential), so I decided to see if I could learn to like her. I don't want to word this as if I only cared about the zap because it was expensive or rare or something, it was more like, at the time, I never even thought I’d own a pastel pet unless I got a FFQ or something, so I didn’t want to just instantly keep zapping when I had been given an opportunity to experiment with customizing a pet I usually wouldn’t have even thought much about. Like, how sad would it be if I zapped her the next day and she became like a red Grarrl or something lol. Plus pastel Aishas are a really cute strange sickly green and orange color combo that I genuinely like. Reminded me a little of a gourd. So I bought Greg the Clompkin to match.
Anyway, to make a long story short despite my best efforts I never really grew attached to SleepingBeast in her Aisha form. I experimented with multiple customs, tried giving her a backstory, had her on my main account for awhile… nothing. I don’t really enjoy customizing Aishas and I could not for the life of me find a wig or hat or head item that fit the vibe I was going for and she just looked kind of unfinished/bald lol. But I knew that I couldn’t just give her up as I still really liked her name, AND at this point I was super attached to Greg the Clompkin, probably more so than SleepingBeast herself at that point haha.
THEN the new baby body paints dropped, and in my rush to get the pink one for my baby Chomby I also got a purple one from one of the multiple capsules I had to open (f gacha style p2w), and although at the time I had no immediate plan for it I knew I wanted to use it for someone. The purple is suuuuuper cute. I started experimenting with what it looked like on various different babies and when I saw that the baby Vanda with purple baby body paint retains its big orange eyes I fell in LOVE. And knew exactly what had to happen…
None of this is actually that interesting but, I guess it was just really funny to me, as I was morphing her I was just thinking about how contentious Vandas are to this day in comparison to beloved pets like Aishas. But that’s the fun of playing the game for yourself and not getting too caught up in external “values” of certain pets or colors ig. I love Vandagyres (she's my third!) and I ADORE her. Just look at how cute she is now 🥺🖤
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A Happy Ending
Word Count: 2,266
Content Warnings: None
Summary: Ruby tells her daughter, Olivia, a bedtime story that's not entirely a fairy tale.
Author's Note: I just wanted to write something quick and fluffy for the anniversary, so I threw this together in the span of like 5 hours. Also, this is the first time my fankid with Junkrat has been in a fic! Please enjoy! :3
Tag list below the cut. Click here or DM me to be added or removed. Reblogs are all seen and appreciated!
@ava-ships @bee-ships @beetleboyfriend @bonbonships @canongf @cloudyvoid @canonjunto @discountwife @dissonantyote @edencantstopfallininlove @final-catboy @gible-love-nibles @gothamcore @halsdaisy @hoppinkiss @hop-n-bedes-malewife @hyperionshipping @iyamifucker @lex-n-weegie @little-miss-selfships @little-shiny-sharpies @loogi-selfships @lovebugexe @mikaelrealman @mintpecks @mrs-kelly @nameless-self-inserts @nerdstreak @paper-carnation @patches-and-her-selfships @poghorn @radioromantic @red-velvet-ships @rexscanonwife @ship-trek @squips-ship @sunnysideships @toogayforthistoday @void-kissed @winterworlds
There was a full moon that night. It shone brightly over the countryside, piercing the mist among the stems of tall grass and the petals of wildflowers that blanketed the rolling hills, transforming the expanse of nature into a glittering oasis. Nestled deep within the prairie was a humble home, built from the ground up to have and hold an unorthodox but deeply-bonded family of four.
And it was within this sleepy home, hidden away from the world, where young Olivia Fawkes-Ramirez was being tucked into bed for the night.
"There we go," her parent Ruby cooed gently as she tucked the pastel yellow blanket under the mattress, knowing that her daughter slept best feeling a bit compressed under her covers. "You ready for lights out, jellybean?"
Olivia paused for a moment and looked up at Ruby with her wide hazel eyes; Ruby could already tell that that meant no, but she also knew that Olivia had a tendency to be too shy to ask directly for what she wanted.
"You know you have to give me the okay, Livvie," Ruby said. "If you don't say anything, then I can't go, and I'll just be here staring at you all night."
Olivia let out a weak giggle, but still didn't speak up.
Ruby continued, "That's gonna be very awkward for both of us, babygirl. And I don't think you're gonna get a lot of sleep like that."
Clutching her favorite stuffed animal- a piglet covered in polka dots- in her arms, Olivia looked to the side as she mumbled, "I miss Daddy and Uncle Mako."
Ruby's heart nearly cracked in two when she heard those quiet words, but she kept a brave face as she reached out to stroke her soft blonde hair. "Oh, I know, chickadee. I miss them too. But hey," she gently placed a finger under her chin to angle her daughter's face towards her, "when you wake up tomorrow, both Daddy and Uncle Mako will be back home, and I'm sure they'll have a present for you like they always do. So if you fall asleep quick, they’ll be here before you know it."
Olivia smiled a bit, but it was clear to see on her face that she was still a bit upset. Ruby thought for a second, brainstorming how to send her child off to sleep with happier thoughts in her young mind.
“How about this, Livvie,” Ruby proposed. “I can read you another story, but then you have to go right to bed. Does that sound like a deal?”
Olivia looked to the side again, pondering the proposal carefully, before looking back to her parent and nodding her head. At that approving nod, Ruby moved toward the bookshelf, when she heard another small noise of protest and looked back to Olivia.
“Umm, mumma… do you think you could tell me a brand new story? I heard all of those ones on my shelf before,” Olivia asked.
A soft smile spread across Ruby’s lips as she immediately took the request in stride. “A brand new story, huh?” she said as she sat back down on the edge of the bed, already thinking of a concept.
Olivia nodded happily, a smile finally returning to her face. “Yeah, and then I’ll go right to bed, I promise!”
Ruby smiled back endearingly. “Now that sounds like a good deal,” she joked, before looking down thoughtfully. “Okay, a new story… Alright, I think I’ve got something. You ready, jellybean?”
Once more, Olivia shook her head in approval and let out a soft “yep” as she sat up, eagerly awaiting her story.
“Alright, here goes,” Ruby began. “Once upon a time… there was a knight. This knight was sent far away from the kingdom that they called home, to protect a small island out in the middle of the ocean. Now, this island didn’t have any treasure or anything on it that made it special. It was just a simple little island, with palm trees and white sandy beaches. There were times when the knight even questioned why they needed to protect it in the first place. But they were a good knight, who wanted to make their king happy, so they devoted themself to protecting the island with their life.
“Many days and nights passed by, and no one, good or bad, came to the tiny island. The knight was starting to get bored, wondering why they were sent there when it seemed like no one would ever show up. But then, one day, someone finally came to the island.”
Olivia was listening to the story unfold with wide eyes, already captivated. “Who was it, mumma?”
Ruby’s smile grew wider, relieved that her improvised story wasn’t a bore. “It was… a pirate! And this pirate was known around the world for being ruthless, dangerous, and altogether just plain mean. When the knight saw the pirate, they got very excited, because they thought that they could bring the pirate back to their king and be called a hero! So, right as the pirate was getting off their little boat they brought to the island, the knight stepped forward.
Ruby put on a theatrical voice, imitating an old-timey English accent. “‘Stop right there!’ the knight said. ‘You’re under arrest, pirate, for stealing treasure from across the seven seas!’
“The pirate was caught off guard. He hadn’t expected anyone else to be on that tiny island. But even more than that, he thought that the knight in front of him was more beautiful than any of the glittering gems he’d ever stolen. ‘Pardon me, good knight,’ the pirate said back politely. ‘I’m just tired from traveling, and would like to rest here on your island. In the morning, I’ll be gone again.’
“Now the knight was shocked too. After all of the stories they had heard about this pirate being so awful, they couldn’t believe how friendly he was acting to them. Still, they didn’t let that distract them. The knight told the pirate, ‘you may rest here for the night. But in the morning, you must come with me back to my kingdom.’ And to the knight’s surprise, the pirate agreed. The two of them would set off across the ocean when the sun rose over the horizon.
“That night, the knight and the pirate laid on the beach together. The knight didn’t want the pirate to leave their sight, just in case he tried to escape. But for the entire night, the two of them just talked. The knight got to hear about all of the pirate’s exciting adventures all around the world, and the pirate heard about the knight’s life alone on the island, and for the first time in a long time, the knight was talking, and laughing, and smiling. They felt like they finally had a friend. But that was silly, because pirates are bad guys. And knights are good guys. They couldn’t be friends… could they?”
Ruby paused for a moment, seeing if Olivia would answer. To her delight, the young girl did speak up. “I think that, they should still be friends if they want to. Because the knight’s happy now.”
“Well, you’ll have to wait to hear how it ends,” Ruby chuckled, glad that Olivia was still on board with the story. “Now where was I… Oh, yes. So, the next morning, the two left the tiny island and sailed off for the kingdom far away. It was a long journey, and there were times when the seas would get rough. But no matter what happened, the two would look out for each other. During the mornings, the pirate would teach the knight about sailing his ship, and during the evenings, the knight would make the pirate a delicious meal. And every night, the two would sit under the stars and talk for hours. They would talk and talk and talk, and some nights they talked for so long that they would be too tired to go to their beds! So they would just fall asleep right there on the deck of the ship, lying next to each other.
“The two got to know each other very well during their long voyage, and once again the knight began to wonder why they had heard that the pirate was so mean and vicious. Sure, the pirate didn’t have the best manners, and he refused to bathe unless the knight begged him to, but he was always so kind and so cheerful, that he made the knight very happy when they were together. The knight wondered if anyone else had ever actually stopped to talk to the pirate, to hear his stories of adventure, to get to know him as a person like they had come to know him.
“But at last, after many days and nights of their long, long voyage together had passed, the two had reached the knight’s kingdom. But now, there was a problem. The knight knew that if they arrested the pirate and brought him to the king, they would never see the pirate again. This pirate, who was now their closest friend, would be lost to them forever. As the two pulled the ship into the dock on the shores of the kingdom, the knight came to the pirate, and they asked him a question.
“They said, ‘Pirate. We have been journeying for a long time now. We have braved the seas together during the days, and talked for long hours during the nights. Over this time, I have come to know you as a friend, a friend that I would be very sad to lose. I need to know, pirate. Do you feel the same way?’”
There was a brief moment of silence, leaving young Olivia in suspense. “What did the pirate say, mumma?”
Ruby smiled, “The pirate said, ‘Yes. I felt the same about you since the moment I saw you, dear knight. I sailed across the ocean to this kingdom with you, knowing what would happen when we made it here, because all of those days and nights spent together were all worth giving up my life of stealing. I want to stay with you no matter what, because I love you.’
“The knight was stunned. They had never heard anyone say that they loved them before, but here was this pirate, confessing his love for them just as they were about to hand him over to the king! The knight was nearly moved to tears as they replied, ‘Pirate, I want you to know that it means everything to me to hear you say those words. And over the days we’ve spent together, I have come to realize something of my own. I love you, too. And I don’t want this to be goodbye, but I don’t know what other choice I have.’
“There was a moment of silence between the two, before the pirate came up with an idea. He said to the knight, ‘Come with me, knight. Leave your kingdom behind, leave the island you were trapped on behind. Stay with me, on my ship, and we will sail the world together. Every day will be a new adventure, and every night, we can lie together under the stars. We can stay together, and most of all, you’ll be free.’ The pirate grabbed the knight’s hand tightly as he finished his proposal. ‘Please, dearest knight. Stay with me.’
“Well, the pirate didn’t need to wait long for an answer. The knight wrapped his arms around the pirate, and they said, ‘yes. Yes, of course I’ll stay with you! I’ll sail away with you no matter where you go. I’ll stay by your side, pirate.’ So, the two of them pushed the boat out from the dock, before anyone else knew who they were or why they were there.
“The knight knew that staying with the pirate would make them an outlaw too. It meant that they probably wouldn’t see anyone from their old kingdom ever again. But they didn’t care. It was worth giving up everything they had known to stay with the man they loved. So, the knight and the pirate sailed away, far away from the kingdom, far away from the island, to have countless adventures, and spend every night under the stars, together.”
Olivia rubbed her eyes, hardly able to keep them open, as she sleepily asked, “And did they live happily ever after?”
As Ruby reached forward to pull the covers back over Olivia, she caught sight of the golden band wrapped around her left hand’s ring finger, and for a moment she fought back the water welling in her eyes as she smiled and answered, “You know what, Livvie? I think that they did.” She kissed her daughter’s forehead gently. “I love you, chickadee. Sweet dreams.”
The young girl’s eyes were already closed, all of her worries now long forgotten as she contently mumbled, “I love you too, mumma.”
Ruby stepped away from the bed on her tiptoes, dimming the lights in the room before pulling the door shut, leaving it cracked just enough for a sliver of light to trickle in. She turned from the door and walked quietly into the living room, picking up a book from the coffee table before resting on the couch. She gave a glance to the clock; it was still early in the evening, and she had a long night ahead of her. After all, her pirate was sailing home to her that night. She wanted to be awake to welcome him back into her arms when he finally arrived.
#ruby's writing#💜: love burning like the sun#🌟💣: the little spark in our lives#self shipping#oc x canon#self ship writing#ok to rb
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We have been very lucky in Falmouth since the 17th June - The Falmouth Art Gallery on the Moor has hosted an amazing exhibition:
The Legend of King Arthur: A Pre-Raphaelite Love Story
I have been a fan of Pre-Raphaelite art for years, even going so far as to organise a tour of art galleries across the UK in 2011 to see famous pieces by Millais, Holman-Hunt, Maddox-Brown and Rossetti among others. I was elated when I discovered that this exhibition was occurring so close to home, especially since it ties in my love for Arthurian myth and legend also.
Possibly my favourite Pre-Raphaelite piece is the Scapegoat by Holman-Hunt, which hangs in the Lady Lever Art gallery in Port Sunlight, Liverpool. I smiled in my soul when I saw the above piece by the entrance, a surprisingly small landscape by Holman-Hunt. I was very surprised to discover that he had visited Cornwall at all, let alone painted somewhere I had visited and been familiar with. I enjoy Holman-Hunt's highly detailed, yet somehow simple pieces, with careful attention paid to the minutiae of the rock formations and portrayal of the damp and dry sand on the shore. A lovely piece.
The main draw of the whole exhibition was "The Lady of Shallot" by Waterhouse. I had not seen this piece in the flesh as it were before, but was taken aback by its actual size, I had surmised it was smaller. It certainly draws the attention like no other painting in the room. I sat and sketched this in the gallery and drew the attention of some of the other patrons, one man, a pastel artist in his spare time, called me brave for being able to sit and sketch. This struck me as something I had not thought of before about my character. Does it require bravery to be a creative? To want to capture something you see without regard of the thoughts of others who might watch you do so? I pondered this while I drew, but was inspired to work on something similar to the Lady of Shallot in the future maybe. It really is a remarkable piece.
Speaking of pastels, I was blown away when I closely inspected this piece by Evelyn De Morgan. On first glance, this is a sketch in pastel of a suit of armour, plaing silver/grey in appearance. If you pay close attention to the work, neither grey nor silver are used in the composition! I will leave it to mystery as to what actually makes it up, but rather than ponder the meanings of the work this sketch informed, I was totally taken away by her material use and technique. Something which, as time passes, is deeply informing my thinking.
Last but most certainly not least, I adored being able to see some work by Elizabeth Siddal. Her story is very familiar to me as part of the wider Pre-Raphaelite canon story, but in all my travels to see Pre-Raphaelite work, I had not come across her work in this manner before. Being largely untutored in art before meeting her future husband, Dante Gabriel Rossetti, she displayed some talent, enough to pique the interest of John Ruskin, renowned enough that I need not explain who he is. I immediately fell in love with the simplicity of these pieces. It made me wonder; does drawing have to be significantly complex or break new ground to be considered worthy of entering the canon of art? Do we have to have a tragic story in order for our work to be considered posthumously? On the whole - why can't we all be remembered for our creations? No matter how simple they may be?
In short, if you are in Falmouth, please stop by this wonderful exhibition and spend as much time as you can soaking in these wonderful pieces and more! You have until 30th September!
#drawing#exhibition#falmouth#pre raphaelite#king arthur#dante gabriel rossetti#william holman hunt#edward burne jones#evelyn de morgan#elizabeth siddal#john william waterhouse#the lady of shalott#kynance cove
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Portobello gills
Another Star Trek-themed heart story, featuring Voyager's Doctor and an Ensign/former member of the Maquis. These stories are all very silly but I hope someone enjoys them. :) And here's a sorta related gif of The Doctor and Kes.
This is the moment I built myself up to, but now I’m worried that I read it wrong. My assumption was incorrect—the EMH did not have stethoscopes entered into his database already. They must be such outdated medical tools that his programmers saw no need for him to be even tangentially aware of them. I’ve just spent the last twenty minutes explaining what mine is, what it’s for, and trying to eloquently describe what it all means to me. He has become so still that I’m almost afraid he’s malfunctioned somehow and deactivated without either of our commands. “Doctor,” I say a little loudly, reaching across the couch to touch his shoulder. I know he’s photonic energy, but I’ll be damned if he doesn’t feel like flesh. He stares into my eyes, but it's like he sees nothing. “Please state the nature of the medical—just kidding, Ensign,” he laughs. I shake my head and smile, glancing down at my shimmering pastel stethoscope sitting between us. My vision blurs slightly, my astigmatism causing the glint of the glitter to expand in an odd way. It takes me a second longer than it should to focus. Maybe I’ve had too much to drink, but at least I haven’t inadvertently activated some subroutine I wouldn’t understand how to deactivate. Somehow, in the last couple of hours of candor, something clicked for me. I’ve told him about my house on Earth, my partner, my cats, and my job as a freshman composition instructor, before I joined the Maquis. I’ve heard his stories about sickbay challenges, his growing fondness for Kes and revelations about her species, and his fantasies about taking command of Voyager and demanding the same respect and admiration Janeway enjoys. Now I’m asking him to listen to my heart, and this has somehow put a wrench in what was an enjoyable evening, a distraction from the dullness of waiting to get home. Is it a step too far? How do you know when you and a hologram are on the same page, emotionally?
“So you’re anxious about something? What are your symptoms?” he asks. “It’s nothing like that!” I say, laughing, wishing at this moment I’d tabled this until later, or maybe never. “I just think it’s really cool,” I say, immediately realizing my mistake. “Is it warm in here?" He asks sarcastically. "Maybe you had too much synthehol?” I have to look at him for a second to realize he’s joking again, and at my expense, really. “You realize I use a much more efficient instrument to scan multiple vital signs for multiple crew members all day? What about this is different, other than it being less comprehensive and less efficient? At the risk of sounding like a Vulcan, is this logical?” I take in a deep breath. I know he's well aware that I'm not asking him to be my doctor, at least not at this moment. I was obviously unprepared for this conversation, and I can feel my heart pounding away in my chest--a circumstance that, unfortunately, makes me yearn to be listened to even more.
“It’s more intimate,” I explain. “And I brought it up because I feel close to you. I want to share my heart with you. I mean…metaphorically. It’s been great…being one of the humanoids you connect with. I hope that we can still be friends after we’re back home. Keep in touch somehow, if you decide to stay aboard Voyager? So yeah…I’m fond of you, I love seeing you develop into someone more complex than the guy I first met. I don't know if you've thought about it this way, but that is very relatable to me, as a human who is also continually changed by my own experiences, as that's practically unavoidable. And I would just love it, if you listened to my heart." The last five words tumble out of my mouth almost as one jumbled mess, so difficult to say out loud. I have to get better at that, I think.
I grow silent while he considers what I've said. "I greatly enjoy your company," he begins. Then, with some hesitation: "I'm just not sure how that is connected to your request." He throws his arms up in the air, a little exasperated, or at least appearing to be. I know that the human doctor he was programmed to simulate, a Lewis Zimmerman from New Jersey, was notoriously ill-tempered, stubborn, and condescending, and our EMH did not stray from that programming easily when he was first activated full-time. It was only when Janeway agreed to expand his programming--both out of necessity and later at the Doctor's request--that he developed a personality all his own. My hope for him when we reach the Alpha Quadrant is that the Federation will grant him personhood on the basis of his sentience, because I'm finding the differences between us continually grow smaller. A precedent has already been set, if not for holograms, then sentient androids, I believe, with Data on The Enterprise. Whatever happens, I like to think I've helped him figure out his individuality, just as he's helped me feel much less lonely on Voyager.
“Am I bothering you with this? Was it a mistake to bring it up? I’m having a nice evening and I’m not trying to ruin anything,” I say. “You’re fine,” he assures me. “I’m simply curious. I want to understand and apparently, I just don’t. I have researched human bonding activities rather extensively. In the context of friendship, at least when it comes to Americans like yourself, evidently there’s little physical contact involved. Humans enjoy hunting for sport, drinking—like you’re doing, dining out together (except I don't consume food), and this game that involves throwing or kicking a sort of oval-shaped leather ball over a goal but is also rather violent...” I’m trying not to laugh at the poor man as he describes American football as no one from my hometown has ever heard it. “But this is not a romantic gesture of some kind? I’ve read about those, too, and—“ I have to stop him. “No, it’s ok—it’s not meant to be a romantic gesture. I still have hope that I’m going to get home to my partner, you know? But it's very emotional. I have strong feelings about it. If that's not obvious.” He sighs. “Well, despite all of my research into social skills and relationships, I’ve never found a reference to this outside of a medical setting. I don’t know what you expect me to do, if not behave as a trained physician. Perhaps I should be advised on how to act and what to say.”
It dawns on me that it is confusing to his mind to be asked to do something for which the only context he has is the wrong one. And there was no prior reason for him to deviate from the parameters that were programmed into him. “So the thing is,” I explain slowly because my heart is pounding in my ears and I’m beginning to feel so embarrassed that I want to hurl myself out of an airlock and into the Delta quadrant void. “I really like being on the other end of a stethoscope. Like, a lot. It makes me feel loved and safe. It's very sensual. I understand that hearts are organs that don’t have opinions, but I feel like my heart lives for being listened to. That’s my thing, admittedly—but I thought you might get something out of it, too. You know how to read a medical tricorder; you know everything that might cause a minor fluctuation in any given reading of the dozens or maybe hundreds that your device can keep track of. But have you ever actually just listened to someone's life force, in real time, with them sitting beside you? An unusual shared experience, right? Just permitted yourself to exist in that moment, outside of anything in your life that's causing you stress? And pondered that for all it represents? I can't tell you what to say or how to act. It just depends on what comes to mind for you, what you feel. Maybe you'll never want to do it again, or maybe you'll enjoy it and then you can just say whatever you want to say. Or keep that to yourself if you'd rather, you know? It would mean a lot to me, anyway, but it's up to you," I add sheepishly.
"No one has ever said that," he says, appearing dumbfounded and...impressed, is it? "Which part?" I ask nervously. "You said 'anything in your life that's causing you stress.' You acknowledged that I could experience stress. That I have a life. I haven't even been active for more than two and a half years." "Well, we all have to start somewhere? Why wouldn't I refer to that as your life?" I ask. He doesn't reply, but takes the stethoscope and affixes it in his ears, uncertainly. “Do I look like a 21st century doctor?” he asks, smiling almost haughtily. “I wouldn’t know firsthand, but yes?” I offer, shrugging. He moves closer to me on the couch and places the chestpiece in the middle of my chest. Immediately he blurts out an, "Oh!" and then "I didn't know it would be so loud. And so fast." "Yeah, I didn't realize you'd just like, go for it just then," I say, staring at the floor, giggling. "But I'm glad." Slowly, he starts to move the chestpiece around, listening everywhere: pulmonic, aortic, tricuspid, mitral. He does know anatomy. I find myself wondering if this is the first time anyone--human or otherwise--has enlisted an emergency medical hologram to have a friendly auscultation session with no medical purpose involved in any way. Is this novel to me, or is this altogether novel an occurrence? I look up and our eyes meet. "Still fast, I guess?" I ask, smiling. "Less so," he tells me. "It's a bit slower, and steady." "I like having you listening to it," I tell him softly, though I wonder if he understands me, in more ways than one. I wait a few breaths, then reach for his other hand to hold it for a moment. I look into his eyes, deeply brown like portobello gills--a pretty organic comparison my mind has conjured for someone computer-generated. They seem inquisitive, and I tell myself (or lie to myself?) that there's also a hint of emotion, of affection, he's associating with this act. I close my eyes while he listens a few seconds longer.
"Well, you are alive," he finally says, handing me the stethoscope, the grainy glitter on its tubing grazing my hand. "That much is certain. As far as standards for humans go, judging by the fact that you clearly have synaptic activity taking place. What I heard indicates that you have four functioning heart valves, as is expected," he continues. "Alright," I say kind of dismissively, holding up my hand that's still clutching the binaurals and grimacing. "You don't have to do that. I mean I guess if that's what you wanted to say. But I mean...this is a sweet moment. I mean, speaking for myself, anyhow. Thank you. You made my night." He cracks a smile and I reach over and put my arms around him, something I've never done before. He seems startled at first, then returns the embrace. He feels surprisingly warm and human himself. For one of the few times in the past two years, I don't mind that I'm stranded in an uncharted part of the galaxy if I get to be surrounded by amazing people.
#cardiophile#cardiophilia#stethoscopes#auscultation#cardiophile story#Star Trek#Star Trek Voyager#Star Trek: Voyager#heartbeats
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Review: Crushed
Synopsis:
It's springtime in suburban Rosewood, which means iced soy lattes, fresh manicures in shimmering pastels - and prom. But while everyone else is flipping through the racks at Saks in search of the perfect prom dress, Hanna, Spencer, Emily, and Aria are on a different kind of hunt: They're looking for A. . . .
Hanna puts her campaign for prom queen on the back burner to volunteer at a burn clinic, where one of A's victims is recovering. Emily digs into Ali's past at the mental hospital with some very crazy consequences. Spencer contacts a private eye to help her stalk her stalker. But when their sessions get a little too private, they may forget to keep their eyes on A. . . . And Aria's worried that A is even closer than she thought. When her dark secret from Iceland finally comes to light, she discovers that maybe, just maybe, the one person she's been trying to hide the truth from has known all along.
The liars are finally taking the fight to A. But no matter what they do, A's always one step ahead, ready to crush the girls completely.
Plot:
After the disaster on the Eco Cruise, the Liars are done with getting tormented by A. Hiding in Spencer's soon-to-be step-father bunker, they create a list of all the potential accomplices to A, whom they are nailed down to be Real Ali, who somehow survived the fire and are being taken care of by a private nurse. With all the names written down, Spencer gives each of the liars a task: Hanna is to go back to the burn clinic that Graham was placed him to see if he recognized A, Emily is to be friends with Iris as she was roommates with the Real Ali at The Preserve, Spencer is to track down Real Ali, and Aria is to investigate the one who has always been there when things went wrong, her amazing boyfriend Noel. As the girls dodge Special Agent Jasmine Fuji, an FBI agent tasked with interviewing everyone staying at the Jamaican resort the same time Tabitha was, she has additional questions for the liars. With prom approaching fast, the liars' love lives are also failing. Hanna has to lie to Mike. Reefer immediately bails on Spencer. Emily's love is also running from the FBI, and Aria is under increasing pressure, suspecting Noel is A. With A always being one step ahead of the liars, it is time for them to fight back and solve the mystery of their tournament before they are sent to jail for a murder they did not commit.
Thoughts:
Sara Shepard is out of their writing slump, as this thirteenth installment is as good as the start of the series. Shepard has the liars actively hunting A down for the first time, trying to figure out who they are and stop the tournament they have been put through. Shepard also ends their "what happens during the summer" segment, finishing off with Aria's Iceland summer adventure, which seemed to come out of nowhere, and similar to the other liars, it did provide plot points throughout this novel, but overall it was not really needed besides providing another character for the liars to interact with in the future. As the series is coming near the end, it is interesting to look at the romance element of the story, as Shepard divides the girls with solid love lives with Aria and Hanna to the one-offers with Spencer and Emily. Shepard spent the entire book twelve trying to get Spencer with Reefer, who bails by page twenty and is set up to never appear again. Meanwhile, Emily lusts after the FBI's most wanted, who also seems like they are never coming back. Yet this is one of several books where we see Mike and Hanna, and Aria and Noel, fighting, getting back together, fighting some more as the liars keep lying to their boyfriends. I understand the concept of maintaining the A secret, and not putting a target on their boyfriend’s back. Still, the liars should realize that by this point, the boys are involved, so lying to them about mundane things, like working at the burn clinic, creates unnecessary problems. This is also the first time Shepard has the girls look inward on who A could be. Throughout the story, Noel is the prime suspect despite being Aria's boyfriend for more than a year. With this focus on Noel and finding A in general, Shepard takes a backseat on previous villains of Kate, Klaudia, and Naomi, who barely get any page time within this novel as the liars are focused on finding A. For this, there is no worse character or best character, as each of the liars is focused on finding A, giving them each of tasks that they do not really mess up, as their hearts are all in it, trying to end the tournament. With this novel having similar cliff-hanger vibes as the first part of the series, this book definitely revamps the series with its fast-moving plot that relates to the series as a whole and character motivations that focus more on A rather than their mundane lives.
A Suspects:
The concept of the novel is our four girls trying to find out who A is, thus I thought it would be fun to keep a suspect list to see how many people Shepard writes for the girls to at one point suspect and by whom. So here is the list for book #13:
Noel by Spencer
Chase by Spencer
Body Count
As Shepard keeps killing people off, I think it would be a good idea to keep track of who died, but without spoiling the ending of the current book, as her habit is killing them off with two chapters to go. So here is the list of the dead for the previous book #12:
Jenna, Ian, Mona, Toby, Courtney, Tabitha and Gayle
Read more reviews: Goodreads
Buy the book: Amazon
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home by heart series (2019) Chalk pastel, and ballpoint pen (for fruitless return)
individual titles: Overripe in a hazy home fruitless return welcome back // to a home // you can never return to
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Partly inspired by The Fall of Home by Los Campesinos!! had that song repeating nonstop while creating this series haha ough its so good
one of my most sentimental series... Hoo boy. I think this was these were the first art pieces I made for my ib art class. Here's the story of its creation:
Initial planning and uh unexpected progression INCLUDING the making of an entirely different art series in the process:
All throughout highschool I missed the townhouse I moved from, which wasn't terribly far from where I ended up living during highschool, but it certainly wasn't mine anymore. I initially wanted to illustrate my old townhome from memory, and then get permission from the new owners to take photos of a few parts of the house I'd illustrated, to show the changes and the inconsistency of memory. Feels very ambitious to me now I think haha but in some ways I was much bolder in highschool than I am now, for better or worse.
So well, the owners said no lol. Fair enough lmao
But! I could still do the first part, draw from memory. And I thought, "I can still take photos of the outside area around the townhouse..."
So I went to visit my old childhood home with my camera. And immediately was completely fucking stunned and sidetracked to see construction happening in the forested area right by it. Not active construction mind, just that there were parked excavators in the middle of the space n trees already cut down.
And that's... actually how I ended up photographing the War-torn photo series! There wasn't do not enter tape or anything or fences So I kinda. figured. it was ok. cough
so after that fuckin emotional experience. I went back to my original task. Went up to my old townhome and took some photos but mostly... Mostly I just looked.
There was a golden rose on the stairs leading up to the door. Everything felt so different and alien, so many new plants in the garden, a tomato plant on the balcony, the blinds all closed. But I recognized the golden rose, because it was one we had planted, still in our pot, that we had left behind. The new owners had kept it.
It was so familiar, and it was glowing in the sunlight. But it kinda made everything else around it look all the more distant from the home I remembered.
So... Instead of photographs I just drew everything from memory. the last trio welcome back, to a home, you can never return to are the parts of my visit that stuck with me most.
Overripe, fruitless return, and in a hazy home:
God this story is long! Overripe features the grape tree from my elementary school that was cut down while I was still there in grade... 5? "Joanna grapes don't grow on trees" yea yea I know; we called it the grape tree because it was a grape vine that had completely taken over a large tree in the centre of a bunch of bramble bushes behind a fence, and was climbing even wider to scale the neighbouring pine trees. It was the meeting spot for me and my friends for a long time during recess. I loved that tree to bits. I was devastated when they felled it
in its place is a firehall, featured in fruitless return. Which is important! But augh god. makes my child heart grieve still.
in a hazy home is the part that adhered most to the original concept: it's the memory of my townhome from memory, featuring the front of my home (with the golden rose on the steps!), blurring into the balcony with my cat apple, and then my room, as viewed from my childhood bed.
wip photos:
more tidbits:
I don't usually use chalk pastels, but I felt its fuzziness fit well for the concept. I also paid attention to the colours, trying to choose appropriate ones to convey the mood of each piece.
also see: Shower of Gifts, a piece related to this series
#home by heart#chalk pastels#illustration#Overripe#in a hazy home#fruitless return#welcome back#to a home#you can never return to#2019#process#ib art#wip
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Mosiac
I’m a mosaic of my life. Every single experience, every single person, every single memory I have has shaped me into who I am today. The bad ones come in shades of deep, brooding blues and dark, vicious reds while the good ones come in soft, comforting waves of pastel pinks and purples.
My parents come in all sorts of shades. They taught me love, but they also taught me fear. They love me so much, and yet it could all change with three words. They taught me conditions and lying and all the things necessary for a closeted kid to survive in a homophobic household, but they also taught me heartbreak. I’d never felt heartbreak until I realized I was lesbian, since it also came a realization: my parents would never truly love me. Sure, if I came out they’d learn to live with it a few years later- but they wouldn’t be happy the way they would be if I was with a man. I thought that they’d never love all of me, and that was my first heartbreak. This realization wasn’t a dark blue or a red or any color— it was a crack that runs through the glass. I had sworn myself to a life of rushed kisses and silent tears, and assumed that would be how the rest of my life would be. That was, until one day in India. We were at a resort and I’d been dropping not-so-subtle hints to her the whole trip. Then, one night, she turned to me and looked me in the eyes and told me she’d always love me. My whole life shifted after that moment.
My brother, however, is midnight blues and scathing reds. If my parents were my first true heartbreak, he gave me little heart fractures. For as long as I can remember, he’s always been selfish. When I was younger, I didn’t care. I wanted him to like me- I wanted to be just like him. He was smart, successful, and popular. He was my parents’ main priority, and I didn’t mind. I remember that in elementary he was well known for being the youngest member on the robotics team, and he helped them win in a national robotics competition. I wasn’t known as Riri, I was known as his little sister- and I was proud of that for a while. However, things changed in the walls of our house. He turned mean- almost emotionally abusive. He lashed out on whoever was near— and most of the time, it was me. My brother would call me mean names- things no child should hear, especially from their brother- and wasn’t satisfied until I was a shaking, sobbing mess. It took years of self reflection, time, and strength to admit that he wasn’t a good person, and even longer to heal. I can confidently say that I’m stronger now, and that I know what isn’t healthy.
I have a reprieve, though- art. Initially, I used to read. I’d spend hours getting lost in tales of dragons and romance and fairies, and I loved traveling every time I read a story. My reprieve then shifted to listening to music as I got older- I’d lay on my bed and close my eyes and let the song wrap around me. I remember blocking out everything: my parents arguing, my brother calling me names, school and friendship issues. I joined an art class in 6th grade, which changed my life. I was accepted, and had a passion that I could truly call my own. Over time, I grew to the point where I was proud to display my paintings. I started an art account on Instagram and grew more confident with myself.
Then come my medical issues- they’re colorless but they take up most of the mosaic’s bottom. Starting in the beginning of my sophomore year, I would get terrible migraines. They weren’t frequent, and I was told I was overreacting and seeking attention, or that those were from my period. My migraines became more and more frequent, and they’d gotten to the point where I would hold back tears every other class period. Then, one day, I had a seizure. The MRI scan revealed a benign brain tumor, which needed immediate operation. Ever since then, my migraines have only gotten worse, and nothing the doctors have tried has helped. When I get migraines, they’re like a freight train- they derail everything I’m doing. So much of my recent years have been spent staring blankly at my wall while I wait for the pain and static to go away. If the mosaic is my life, my migraines a transparent void with no real purpose other than to take up space.
My mosaic isn’t finished yet. My life has barely begun, and it’s important to remember that in the end, these years will be a distant memory for me. However, it’s still important to look back at all the colors and experiences that make me me and contribute to my identity, and remember that I still have so much growth left in my journey.
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cutie - jasper hale
Hello! I saw you had your requests open! And I saw your meanie fic. I wanted to ask for a Jasper x reader who is like cat valentine, she/her please but GN is just fine if that is more comfortable for you please 💜🦋
hi love! from what i remember cat is very nice, sweet, slightly childish, excited, and soft, i was always jealous of her room in sam and cat!! jade and cat were carrying victorious imo :/ i hope you like it! <33 i might rewrite this as i don't quite know how i feel about it :(
word count: 668 warnings: none
You were known throughout the entirety of Forks and even outside of the town
Especially for your friendliness
You attend Forks High School and also there you are known as the fun girl
There is no one in school that you haven't befriended yet, even the Cullens
People were almost jealous of the amount of energy that you have to do all these things
All the clubs you are in, all your hobbies that you do, homework...
And even after hours of school, you would still be jumping around and cracking jokes
"How much coffee did you drink? Or did you just sleep for twelve hours?"
"Oh, no! No coffee and I slept for a full three hours today."
How??????????? Do you do that
Just a smile and a giggle as if you haven't been awake for hours already
"Is this seat taken?"
The blonde man smiles before taking his bag off of the chair next to him, allowing you to sit next to him
Your fellow classmates (actually, everyone at school) are quite confused by the friendship between you and Jasper
How can someone so stoic and cold spend most of his day with the most bubbly, enthusiastic person in the world?
But it works out for some reason
That reason being Alice
She saw you coming, of course, and she knew that she had to set Jasper up with you one way or another
When the Cullens first came to Forks, you were the one to show them around
That is when Jasper found out why Alice was so excited to go to school
Soon after the meeting, you became close friends with Jasper, hanging out with him whenever you could
He even joined the History Club with you
Jasper can feel your emotions, but they confuse him
Your emotions could flip in a second, from mad to happy to sad
It is chaotic, but he is happy that he can help you out
He likes to sit with you as you always have a story to tell about your past, your family, or anything really
"If only my life was as eventful as yours," he would laugh
He would try all of your hobbies with you, old and new
You also have a lot of random collections
Crystals, drawings, stickers, figurines
The biggest collection you have is probably plushies
Having your memories with you is very important, as you do not have the greatest memory
Even though you and Jasper have been friends for a while, you would doubt yourself
To the outside world, you would seem happy and enthusiastic, but you can't possibly be like that all day, every day
You would often think that you talk too much, maybe that you were too childish or annoying
Jasper is quick to assure you that you are perfect the way you are
He could immediately tell when your mood changed
Vampire powers
He would be the most supportive person that you could imagine
So much so, that he buys you a stuffed animal wherever you guys visit
Be it a zoo, a town, the mall, maybe even an amusement park
You wouldn't leave without a stuffed animal or a plush keychain
Jasper bought your new favorite plush at a toy store
A cute pastel pink cat plushie
The perfect size to cuddle or use as a pillow
You would always take the plushie with you, either in your backpack or on their own place on the backseat of Jasper his car
The two of you might be an odd combo, but that never stops you
Jasper and his family adore you
You're like a little angel to them
If they thought that Jasper was good at changing their mood with his powers... They were wrong
No matter how bad anyone felt, you would always make them feel better
You might not be the smartest from your school, but you would make sure that everyone felt their very best
Exactly what Jasper does for you <3
#twilight imagine#twilight x reader#jasper hale imagine#jasper hale x reader#jasper cullen imagine#jasper cullen x reader#jasper hale#jasper cullen
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part 3 to the student with miah can he get REALLY PERVY pls love your work💖💖
New threat
Pairing: professor!Jeremiah Valeska X student!Reader
Warnings: stalking, stealing, dark Miah, perv, obsessions..
Words: 1699
Summary: Jeremiah visits Y/n's dorm.
Note: Sorry for the mistakes and the English. This WAS another part of the series ’His student’. (Everyone is of age in the story)
He wasn't supposed to do that, he wasn't supposed to be there at that moment in the dormitory building while students were in class and he wasn't even supposed to get lost according to his plan, he had...borrowed Y/n's dorm room key one day when they were in the cafeteria without her noticing, some might consider it as stealing but Jeremiah didn't consider it that way.
The building was had several floors and the man had already forgotten what floor he was on but fortunately there was the number on Y/n's key which made him realize that he had to go up one more floor to be in front of the door exactly as he wanted; he put the key inside and went in slowly closing the door behind him, when he was inside and looked up he found two beds on the right a bed decorated with a Modern Shabby Chic style and on the left one with a Bohemian style, he immediately approached the bed on the left recognizing that that was the style that was closest to Y/n,s and began to observe the decorations so different from the other side of the room.
On the right side in the Modern Shabby Chic part the bed was white with lots of pillows in pastel pink and some black and blush pink accents, there were five frames hanging on the wall, a simple minimalist white inspirational tapestry and eyelash decor, there were also some Fairy Lights attached on the wall above the frames.
On the left side, on the other hand, the bed was with floral and white sheets, it had pillows of different shapes and colors, a round mirror attached to the wall right above the pillows and where she rested her head, above the mirror were small plant pots hanging with Fairy Lights exactly like on the right side.
If Jeremiah turned his head he could see the desks of the two female students that reflected the same style as the beds, an elegant white with the same colors as before but blush and pastel pink prevailed there.
On the other part instead the thing that stood out the most was a Leaning Bookshelf with books and plants and again Fairy Lights, hanging above the white desk were moons and the chair she owned was made of wood just in the Bohemian style, there were however boxes full of objects that made Jeremiah realize that the girl would be moving soon but that did not stop him from snooping even more.
He opened the desk drawers taking a look then ended up opening the drawers that were next to the bed finding her clothes and underwear, he took a quick look stopping as soon as he had her bra in his hands, the man was doing just what he had promised himself not to do which was to be a creep but there he was sniffing the scent of his obsession while stuffing some panties in his pocket and closing the drawer before lying down on the bed to hug her pillow and sniff it to smell Y/n's perfume, if he could he would have stolen... borrowed her pillow as well but she would have noticed that.
Jeremiah was too immersed in his thoughts and smell to notice the approaching footsteps and voices, he realized only at the very last having time however to arrange the bed and pillow and quickly hide under the bed on the right watching the dorm room door open and four legs enter i.e. two people.
He recognized Y/n's voice immediately while the other did not think he knew her, the two girls entered and closed the door, one settled at the desk and the other on the bed, Y/n was the one on the bed who was listening to her roommate talk "oh come on Y/n, you can't turn it down it's your first date, you haven't been out in a long time" the other girl complained while taking off her shoes and sat on her bed "that's not true, I go out every day to go to class" there was a nod from the roommate while she lay down "oh sure to go see that hottie of your engineering teacher...I bet he has freckles all over his body and when I say all over I mean all over" her name coming out of Y/n's lips who was blushing and amused made her burst out laughing saying she was only telling the truth.
There was a moment of silence before the girl spoke again "do you think he is as innocent as he shows himself? Maybe he's a virgin'' at this Jeremiah frowned slightly holding back a snort, freezing when he saw Y/n take off her shoes and slowly unbutton her pants while thinking before answer "in my opinion... he's not that innocent" she stated as she slipped off her pants remaining in black lacy panties, the other girl smiled amused lying down on the bed to look at her "how so?" she shrugged her shoulders moving to the shirt she was wearing "because quiet people always hide more and even in class if you pay attention you can notice traits that you wouldn't notice if you looked at him without interest" this made the other giggle who asked her if that meant she had an interest in him and Y/n said no but confirmed about her paying attention... sometimes which made the other girl laugh even more.
Y/n's shirt ended up on the floor too and Jeremiah now had his obsession in underwear in the foreground, black lace panties and a push-up bra of the same color and material, the man's hazel eyes couldn't move simply daydreaming of being able to touch and see her with even less but his dream was interrupted when he heard the roommate's voice again "so? what do you think you're doing?" there was a shrug while Y/n bent down to pick up something showing her ass right in Jeremiah's direction who couldn't hold back a small moan coming out of his mouth that wasn't heard thankfully, if he would have stayed there any longer with that sight in front of him he probably would have cum without even touching himself, these thoughts made him distracted for a moment and freeze as soon as he looked again at Y/n seeing her approaching as if she was looking right at him, she bent down on the floor foregrounding her bra-covered boobs while putting an arm under the bed almost touching him, there was a small muffled whimper from Jeremiah before he realized what she was trying to pick up soemthing coming face to face with a small blue-eyed white cat that looked at him meowing cutely, the 'ex-engineer forced himself and moved it over to Y/n as she leaned in more now almost putting her boobs in his face allowing him to stare at them for a moment and get closer by giving it a kitty lick and moving away to make it look like the kitten had done it, an amused giggle escaped the lips of the student who took the animal making a joke before sitting down on her bed petting it.
The two stayed talking for a while while Y/n got dressed in other clothes, answering the curious questions she was asked, ending up being almost late for a date she had with someone, of course Jeremiah wanted to know more but he didn't have to try to follow her to find out since her friend asked the questions for him without even knowing "With whom? When are you coming back? Where are you going? Is it serious? Is it the guy from the cafeteria? " there was an answer for all the questions while Y/n fixed her hair and slightly her makeup "I'm going out with Mila, the girl with long pink hair and bangs, green eyes and often her cheeks and nose with pink makeup blush, we're going to eat something together, it's not serious I'm hoping for a hook up honestly, it's not the guy from the bar" the girl nodded as she looked at her "I didn't know you liked girls" Y/n just shrugged smiling "it's worth a try isn't it? maybe I'll find out I'm bi" she smiled again before waving goodbye and hurrying out with her bag.
As soon as the door closed the girl who was still there got up from her bed, lying down on Y/n's bed while sighing smelling her perfume just like Jeremiah had done earlier, from that angle the professor could finally see the girl's face, her skin was white but slightly tanned, her eyes a light brown, she was wearing makeup like mascara and eyeliner, you could clearly see that she had fixed her eyebrows as well, her hair was long but not much, she was a brunette and she had a nose piercing. .a septum, she had acrylic nails and was staring at the mirror before she closed her eyes and cuddled her friend's pillow, sighing slightly annoyed without stopping to pet the head of the little cat that belonged to her and was named 'Paloma'.
That student had to be added to Jeremiah's list for sure, he had to keep an eye on her as a possible threat to his plans, he just had to find out her name which was easy since her bag was on the floor and he could reach it to approach it and read the name written on it before getting out from under the bed and running out of the room unseen, noticing when he was already outside the girl looking down the hallway confused and slightly scared.
Jeremiah climbed back into the car where Ecco was waiting for him and went back to his house as he finished writing down in his small notebook the name and surname of the new threat 'Madeleine "Maddie" Ella Kruiz' giving the task to his assistant to take care of finding information about her.
Taglist:
@gabile18
@mrsfullbuster500
@trainer–taylor
@elizamalfoyy
@eovjjj
@animefan3223
@jeremiah-va1eska
@gothamchic16
@rabbiteggz
@dieg0brandos-wife
@rottenecstasy
@lazyexcuse
@teh-vampire-bunny
#gotham x reader#gotham#gotham tv#jeremiah valeska#jeremiah valeska x reader#jeremiah valeska imagine#jeremiah x reader#ecco gotham
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