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steamberrystudio · 2 months

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28/07/2024 Devlog

Hallo everyone! Time for the tumblr update! I have big news! So read on!

Summary:

Finished drafting Yren's ending

Revised Kav, Noel, Raif, and Yren

Formatted/Scripted Kav, Noel, Raif, and Yren's endings

Worked on the play test for Yren

One new BG

Lots of UI stuff

Big Fiddly To Do List

Writing:

I am done with the writing. (Well. As done as one ever really is. I was telling another writer friend of mine just yesterday that we're never really done until the moment we have to ship the project to someone).

BUT. I am done with the rough draft. I am done with the major revision. So from this point onwards, the changes will be more minor as I play test and others play test (eventually. I'm the only one testing right now).

So going forward you probably won't be getting any writing updates because there won't be enough to report. Cause...it's done.

Uncoded word count is 657,000 words.

Coded word count is 616,000 words (this is how much actually ended up in Ren'py).

Huzzah. My 350,000 word story is done. He he. He. LoL

It took so much longer than I thought it would even though I was writing every day - sometimes 3000 words a day!

Timing was just so hard for this project. It was much more difficult to predict a total word count for this game. Because of the structure of this game, word count variations are going to be much more noticeable and I had to focus and work a little harder to keep everyone in much tighter alignment. So when one route (like Asher), increased by 5000 words, I knew immediately I would have to increase all the others by roughly the same amount.. That meant the overall word count goal instantly increased by 25000 words.

Additionally, any time I made a small change in something - whether it was lore or a minor wording or vocabulary change (for instance, changing one thing from "system void" to "gate void" then to "nexus void") - each time, I had to go change that thing in all the other routes.

There was a lot of continuity babysitting.

This was somewhat true for GS but not to the same degree. Not everything mentioned in one route in that game was even mentioned in the other routes. So I might need to only change one other route's references to that thing but not all nine routes. Or maybe no other route would need changes. In WSC, it was all 6 routes every single time.

So even if I was focusing on one particular route, I could never really work on that route in a vacuum. I was constantly having to go check on and edit the other routes for things too.

This not only made it harder and more time consuming to write in general, but also just made it impossible to predict things like how much time it would take.

But that is squared away. Life is good.

Art:

Just some BG stuff. I've been so focused on writing that not much of that focus has been spread around to art so there's not much to report here.

Other Stuff:

UI.

As you know I've been making some visual changes to the UI. Mostly minor stuff involving slight changes to the general aesthetic of the UI. Those fixes are largely complete.

And now the focus has shifted to adding more of the features and functionalities that have been planned but on-hold for the last year.

The new save screen is coded. This save screen, as you can see, divides the characters up by name and lets you add additional save slots when you've filled up all the empty ones.

For a game like WSC, where people may have multiple playthroughs for different characters going at the same time, I thought it would be useful to have this paged organisation. I always find that even if I try to keep my playthroughs separate and organised, they invariably get messy. This is true in other games, this is true for my personal play tests...

I'm really hoping this structure helps with that.

Another feature I'm adding to WSC is a recap screen.

I know that with episodic games, one of the struggles people have is that they forget some of the story details during the gap between episodes. So people feel like they constantly have to replay and refresh their memory. This is, of course, an attempt to help players maybe not have to do that.

The idea is that I will update this with every episode so that people who want a recap can just click in and refresh their memory.

There are some other features that have been added in. Some other QOL of life things. And there are more features to come. I won't go into everything here.

But those things are slowly coming together as well.

There are a lot of things that have to be done before the first episode can release. Some are major things like completing the CGs or coding the sprite expressions. Some are more minor like adding the in-game achievements.

And there are also a ton of smaller, more fiddly things. Like double-checking the styling of certain words (my editing programs could never decide if they preferred home world or homeworld and so both get used.)

I want to fix those kinds of things so testers don't have to worry about pointing them out.

I have a massive to-do list filled with all of those big and small things. And now I'm working through it.

I have also been doing a play test of Yren's route. I have to personally do each route one time just to see if there are any significant issues that need to be fixed before anyone else sees the game. So I've been doing that as well.

Upcoming Weeks:

Finishing my own play test of the game. This goes fairly slow because I play test with the self voicing enabled. And that means that I'm playing through it at a much slower pace. I also stop frequently to fix typos, change repetitive wording. Or may slightly more substantial fixes.

I've been testing for like...2 hours a night because I've been focused on writing during the day. But I'm going to be increasing the time I spend play testing so that hopefully I can get through the rest of it a little faster.

Additionally, all the UI and "Fiddly List" stuff will continue to be worked on as well.

So that's where we are.

We have moved past writing and into the next phase of development. I'm really excited to be finally focusing on other stuff.

That is all for now. I will see you next time.

#devlog #when stars collide #indie otome #amare game #updates

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cleolinda · 11 months

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The happenings, Tumblr edition

Obviously I am not happy about the prospect of Tumblr going into sunset "guess we'll just let it die" mode (or possibly "Let's sell it to fuck knows who!!"), if that is indeed what is happening. My clinical anxiety needs a lot of things. This is not one of them.

I've been using Tumblr as my primary hangout for pretty much exactly a year now. I am tired of watching platforms enshittify and crumble. Why does this keep happening to us. I am weary.

At the same time, yeah, Twitter is dogshit now, but a year after it got taken over, it is there still. There were some problems on Reddit, but it's thoroughly still there. There was time to figure out some migration for all the good it did.

I worked on essay-type posts and recaps all this year to figure out approximately how many spoons I have and how much I can expect to post a month, before I actually got the Patreon running in October. A solid 1-2 Long Posts a month, it seems like, and maybe more frequently if I do shorter posts. And Tumblr has great opportunities to just keep reblogging and sharing things, sometimes adding comments, so I feel like I'm active even when I'm stuck trying to finish a post of my own.

So now, fuck me, I guess

So I have the Patreon as a way to say, hey, I'm here no matter what else happens, sign up for the ~*free*~ weekend linkspam/check-in, here's what I posted wherever this week, I'll put up some early or extra stuff if you'd like to upgrade to a fancy tier someday. It is truly most important to me for people to just know where I am; you don't have to commit to the $1 or $5 tiers.

But I also want a way to post my writing publicly, so people can, you know, see it. So I'm gonna start mirroring my own longer posts on Dreamwidth, I guess. That's the place I know to go back to.

Hopefully Dreamwidth does not go also down in flames!!!!

I've started archiving some of my work (also from LJ and Twitter) as PDFs in Dropbox. Mostly as a safeguard for myself, but I'll make it a public link on the Patreon.

I would really like to keep up with where people are going, what sites people are going to try to migrate to next, and I'll pass that info on as I get it.

All that said, I think most of us will stay on Tumblr as long as we can, if only for the very unique shoot-the-shit culture it has. Like, people aren't leaving it so much as preparing for the future.

#tumblr #the happenings #me for some reason #odds and ends

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bomberqueen17 · 9 days

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who let me out

Most of the time I spend on Tumblr has been taken up in writing these Aubreyad book recaps so I haven't been talking about my own life but there's not a lot to say.

However!

I am making a voyage to England next week which is extremely exciting, and yes I'm going to see the museum exhibit about that archaeology dig I was so excited about. I have been so stressed lately that I have barely thought about this and in fact last night I finally was like "do i need like. socks n underwear for this trip. idek." and i haven't even looked at weather reports so I don't know what clothes I need. But I did live in the UK for a while once so I'm fairly confident that my good raincoat and new waterproof boots will be a good start towards an autumn wardrobe.

So I hope to talk about that more, coming up.

Meanwhile, rambling about personal life stuff

The last stint at the farm was so fucking stressful. I had to work the market sometimes, which means a full day of work on Saturday. We had so much work to get through, and several people who help us weren't available, so we had to do it all ourselves, and that meant some ten-hour days, meant some exhausting slogs. At the end I was like "do you know what I'm not going to do while I'm on vacation?" "no, what" "ever touch raw chicken." I singlehandedly had to package like 1000 pounds of raw chicken in two days, after having packaged 200 whole chickens the day before. I was just so tired of the way raw cold chicken feels in my hands. Ugh ugh ugh.

I got so stressed I just wasn't sleeping, which sucked. Oh, I'd get into bed, and I'd fall asleep at my normal time-- usually around 10pm-- and then I'd wake up at 2am and that was it, I was up for the day. I tried various things-- went to bed at 9, woke up at 1-- lay there pretending to sleep-- got up and wrote-- got up and walked around-- one night I watched the entirety of the Master & Commander movie from 2003 on YouTube. Why not! I did remember some of it from 20 years ago, how funny.

(My dad liked that movie. His favorite thing to do during movies was to quibble about historical inaccuracies. But this movie had so much fanservice for reenactors in it that he was quietly delighted. His quibble was that the violin and cello duets were too good, they should've recorded amateurs. He had a point.)

Anyway. I was researching various methods of helping one sleep-- the only one at my disposal was weed gummies and I spent one very miserable night just lying there high and bored and not sleeping and wasn't totally sober when morning came and that fucking sucked. I commute on foot or I never would have risked it, but being very slightly still high and exhausted and trying to do repetitive physical work was really, really dispiriting.

but we got everything done. In the end. And I left. And once I got home I went to sleep and I have not had really any appreciable trouble sleeping since. I can even nap, sometimes!

Heck.

One of the things I'd meant to take care of while I was at the farm was that of course on my birthday, my fucking driver's license expired. On the one hand, thank you DMV, it used to be that everyone's license expired on the same day, so you'd have to go wait in massive lines to get it dealt with. Now it's... not evenly distributed exactly, because people's birthdays are a random distribution, but it's a perfectly logical and reasonable way to organize expiration dates. But it meant that in the midst of this exhausting miserable stint of work when I didn't have time to do anything really fun for my birthday (don't cry for me, my mom made me a cake and my BIL bought me ice cream treats) I also was consumed with angst about needing to renew my license. i was so sure they'd yell at me because I hadn't renewed before it expired-- but they wanted me to do an eye test, and I could not, could not coordinate that, I'm overdue for an optometrist appointment by several years and I just could not fucking make it happen.

So I went to the DMV yesterday and was like "i both want to renew this license and upgrade it to the enhanced version since that will be required for planes soon" and they were like "we need both your passport and your social security card and two proofs of residency." and i was like you need the social security card and proof of residency to get the passport. and they were like yeah but we need all four things too. so I went back home with the form and found the various necessary proofs, but then I was able to make an appointment to go back. Great!

(They say, "make an appointment online!" but if you look up the DMV website there's nowhere to do it, and if you go to the website of that branch of the DMV there's nowhere to do it. Want to know why? Because it's not through the DMV it is through the county clerk's office. Now U Know: Go to the county clerk's office and navigate to their section on the DMV. It's separate! Who fuckin knew! Now you do! [In my case this was erie.gov because that is my county, but it may vary for you and if you are not in new york state i have no advice for you.]

All having an appointment means is that you are in a separate queue to be seen, which is likely faster than the general pool but may not be. Still, I thought it was a good idea.

And then it was early for my appointment and I was getting my shit together and I had my social security card and an old W-2 with my address and social security number and my old license with my address on it and for some reason I thought I could use my checkbook but that's not what they mean by a cancelled check but whatever. I had just a random pile of shit. And

where was my passport

where is my passport?

i'd had it in my pocket but i was sure i'd removed it from the pocket and put it into my purse. but it wasn't in my purse. "did you see it inside the house," asks dude patiently, who also is prone to losing shit and who knows me very well. "I don't know," I have to answer. "I remember putting it in my purse and it isn't there." I search the place I put my purse a thousand times, I go through the desk where I was sitting to collect the other proofs but i knew, I knew I had not brought it in there. Time is slipping away, I will miss my appointment. God time is slipping away and I can't find the thing. I ransack the house. I finally run out to the car, did I leave it on the seat in the car? It is not in the car.

In desperation, as it is fully time to leave the house and I will be late if I don't, I gather up all my other papers and go out to the car. "I will just go," I say, "and ask them, did they find it, because that is the last place I am absolutely sure I had it." Because the woman had looked at it to see if I had my social security card between the pages. And she'd handed it back to me. But my memory is such that the rest of what I did is not certain; I remember taking it, I remember putting it into my pocket, but this might be a story I am telling myself. This is the way in which I am a very good liar, because I do not remember things very well, and my well-honed abilities as a storyteller mean I am very, very good at instantly constructing what it would make the most sense to have done, and telling that story even to myself. But. here's the horrible truth: i don't know if it really happened that way. Many things I have witnessed, important things, I remember the story of but I'm not entirely certain they happened that way. Any story I tell may be fictionalized, and I usually dont' know it.

So anyway.

Got out to my car and there on the ground in the road (I am parked in the street) there is my passport lying next to the driver's side door of the car. When I had checked the car earlier, I had only gone to the near side, the passenger side, and looked in the window. It had never occurred to me that my memory of putting it into my purse might have been me just setting it on my purse and it not going in, which is clearly one hundred percent what happened.

So that was. A fucking wild ride, and I did not cry but only because I was too overwhelmed. I made it to the appointment and I could not hear the very nice clerk very well so I kept nodding at her in blank incomprehension and then not doing what she'd asked me to do. But this is the thing-- if you think of the most brutally competent people on the entire face of the planet Earth you might be tempted to imagine like, IDK, Marines or something, but that would be wrong, it is the clerks at the DMV. They will Get It Done, whatever the fuck it is, and they will NOT put up with your shit, but they will also not be mean to you. They will not usually waste time in smiles or gratuitous displays of humanity, but they are never cruel, they are implacable and pitiless but they are fair and they will help you and they will not smile about it but they will tell you which option to tick off on the form so that you don't have to pay a bunch of extra money, and they will be understatedly kind if you are frightened, and they will calmly and impassively repeat their instructions until they penetrate your uncomprehending skull, and you will get what you need to get because this is deadly serious and they are the kind of bureaucrat that actually make the world go round. It is not sunshine and rainbows but it will absolutely get done even if it takes months and years.

Anyway there's some kind of divinity in low-level bureaucrats who actually have to talk to frightened people, I tell you what.

The only time my clerk smiled at me was when I didn't hear her and she had to repeat that the screen was asking me if I wanted to register to vote, which is an automatic part of all their transactions. "Oh, no," I said, "I'm already registered," and she said "then press no," and I said "I do really appreciate the reminder though," and she smiled at that.

(They also ask you to enroll as an organ donor. NYS is an opt-in state, and many people just don't opt in; opt-out states have much higher enrollment for obvious reasons. Please opt in unless your religion or beliefs proscribe it! There are never enough organs and your grieving family will almost never remember to opt you in at the moment of extremity. You could save so many lives, and improve so many others. This PSA brought to you by someone who spent the pandemic lockdown in the home of a member of the local hospital's liver transplant team, who was so busy because all the New York hospitals had shut down their transplant facilities in order to turn the ventilators over to Covid patients, so everyone in New York who was getting a liver was getting it in Rochester. From my guy's team. So it was a stressful time. But I am successully re-enrolled as an organ donor. I am quite sure I already was one but the only two options were Yes or No so I checked Yes.)

Anyway I have so much to do and am so burned-out that I'm repeatedly getting stuck staring at things in odd rooms, so. We'll see how this goes. I have five days left to get ready for this trip wish me luck.

#about the author #personal updates

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waitmyturtles · 10 months

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Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: The Bad Buddy Rewatch Edition, Part 3b -- More on BBS and Asian Cultural Touchpoints

[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. Today, I offer the second half of the third (ha!) of five posts on Bad Buddy. I'll look today at themes that myself and fellow Asian fans of Bad Buddy have caught and related to in this wonderful show.]

Here are links to part 1, part 2, and part 3a of the BBS OGMMTVC Meta Series. Today's post is a continuation of part 3a. Part 4 is here.

Yesterday, I began an unwinding about what I am calling the "Asian Cultural Touchpoints" of Bad Buddy -- the Asianness of Bad Buddy that is rooted and coded in the way people interact with each other.

As a quick recap from yesterday: I have been insanely lucky to engage in conversation with a number of legendary Asian BBS stans about the Asianness within Bad Buddy: huge shout-outs and thanks go to @grapejuicegay, @recentadultburnout, @telomeke, @neuroticbookworm, and @lurkingshan (who is not Asian, but has Asian relatives and is well-versed in the nuances of our cultures!). We captured a lengthy list of Asian cultural signposts in Bad Buddy and we've been having great discussion around them, including:

1) saving face, 2) intergenerational/inherited trauma, 3) the unique nature of secret-keeping in Asian cultures/societies, 4) enmeshed family boundaries, 5) setting up children to compete against each other for the sake of familial pride, 6) patriarchy, sexism, and the reversal of sexism among next generations, 7) the inset/assumed roles of family members based on patriarchy and elder respect, 8) assumed community within and external to one's family, usually based on where you live and where you go to school, 9) how one's identity is defined based on patriarchy and individualist vs. collectivist cultures, 10) how various cultures within an Asian nation live peacefully (or not) together (for example, what makes Pat and Pran different by way of Pat's Thai-Chinese heritage vs. Pran's ethnic Thai heritage),

and many more.

I unwound yesterday on the cultural touchpoints of saving face, intergenerational/inherited trauma (partly as a follow-up from my very first thesis on Bad Buddy), and the singular nature of secret-keeping in Asian cultures.

There's no way I can get through this entire list in two posts, but I do want to touch upon competition, enmeshed family (and friend, sometimes) boundaries, and patriarchy and sexism as three other cultural touchpoints that engendered quite a bit of conversation among our BBS mini-village.

Competition: ALL OVER BAD BUDDY. All over it, and we know it, and for the most part, we love Pran's and Pat's little love battles. Pat and Pran are constantly competing. Pat gets Chief Phupha into it in Our Skyy 2, dang it ("I'm Pha Pun Dao's top-notch," Phupha, psh). We don't know if the guys can function without having a competition going between them at any given point.

We know this structure started with their parents. As I talked about yesterday, considering the trauma that Ming and Dissaya faced in their young lives -- the trauma that they passed down to Pat and Pran, the rivalry and almost unbridled hatred that they expected Pat and Pran to embody -- all of that emanated through competition between the guys. Their parents asked them, daily, how the other kid was doing in school, making sure that their son was winning on top. As we know from Pat's rooftop monologue in episode 5, that was baggage he carried with him his entire life.

So many of these cultural touchpoints can be connected to the idea of saving face, as I wrote about yesterday. It is an overarching rule of any Asian child's life that Asian parents demand to be able to brag about their kids. Give me an Asian kid whose parents didn't do that to them, and I'll give that kid a huge hug, a gold medal, and a wish in an envelope that I could have had their childhood. Awards, top grades, top class positions, top university admissions: the need to be the best is neverending, for the sake of a parent not losing face for their child not succeeded at the top level of everything.

@telomeke notes the inherent cultural demands of Pran's and Pat's family in the competition paradigm that Pat outlines above.

[Re: Ming and Dissaya]: [E]very time [the children] do well, the bar often gets pushed a little higher. We actually see Ming doing this to Pat in Ep.1 ... when Pat tells him he was made class president. Ming says something like "get yourself a gold medal for rugby and then I'll let you brag"; Pat's achievement (though not dismissed) is downplayed rather than celebrated, and another goal is set. Anyway, my read is that both the boys had caliber to start with; it's natural to Pran (we don't see Dissaya really pushing him to excel), and I think he pushes himself to excel, to be the virtuous paragon of everything, as a barrier to the outside world, and to protect his vulnerable, secret interior. ... And Pat was pushed by Ming to match Pran's achievements, though not for the usual Asian parent reasons – it was to continue his own efforts to best Dissaya, IMO...

What @telomeke outlines here correlates perfectly with my own experiences of my Asian childhood: that even in the face of successes that my parents demanded, the reward was only a passive comment that I had to be doing more. There was never a moment where a parent's cup of happiness was truly filled from the child's perspective.

However, in the case of Pran and Pat specifically: @grapejuicegay had a further illumination that highlighted the utter pain and sadness of the outcomes and consequences of their lifelong competition. We know they were perfectly paired as a couple in love. But ultimately? Because of the pressures they faced as children vis à vis each other -- they also become the only people who could compete with each other. AND, because of that reality -- a new kind of empathy sprung up between them, what I called in part 1 of this series a radical empathy of a kind we don't always see between enemies to lovers. @grapejuicegay's thoughts:

I'm just thinking about the first family interactions we see for Pat and Pran and how Dissaya is framed as a concerned parent with her main worry being Pran taking on too much on his plate with being the head of the department. But also how that's so far removed from what her influence had made of him - an overachiever to the highest degree. ...[T]he whole point of Pat and Pran is that they're evenly matched in everything (which works so well because they're both such EXTRA little shits with so many lil' interests), and it's been there since the [original] trailer. They both keep competing to see who can get the most achievements to brag about, eventually settling down to a point where they help each other out because they're each other's only worthy competition because they're the only ones who can keep up with each other [emphasis mine]. So.... Dissaya's concern is nice and all, but she created this monster who not only can handle having so many responsibilities, but ENJOYS it. And Pat's help is always pushing him to do all of it, just have some help along the way so he's not doing it all alone. Wai helps, but he has to be manipulated into it. So the only person ACTIVELY helping Pran even when neither of them thinks he needs it is Pat ("I know you can do it, but I want to do it for you").

I was tremendously moved when @grapejuicegay shared her read with me on this, because not only did it land fully with me -- but it served to highlight the sadness and loneliness that existed in the gulf between Pran and Pat prior to their union. In other words, because they knew, so well, HOW to compete with each other -- if they needed help, they were the only ones who knew HOW to help each other. Pat showing up at the dilapidated bus station; Pran showing up at the empty auditorium. They could vibe when each other needed a little push. They knew WHEN and HOW to help each other, with the fluency they had ABOUT each other, even before their relationship began -- because they had been competing all their lives. As Pat said in Our Skyy 2: "we've been neighbors all our lives." They knew each other's ins and outs better than even their families did.

The competition that Pran and Pat engaged in had significant cultural roots. But the long-term impact of that competition? It rendered the guys on their own lonely island, a place where only the two of them could understand each other fully. It's a romantic conclusion -- to know your partner so well like that, it can fill your heart with nostalgic reckoning. But as Pat said above and to his father -- it was a bruising path, for the both of the guys.

There's a lot to enmeshed boundaries in Bad Buddy. The boundaries that SHOULD exist between two people that regularly get crossed. I definitely want to acknowledge, before I unwind on these boundaries, that Western vs. Asian viewers will have different expectations of exactly what enmeshment looks like and what it means. I'll have more on this in a bit.

When I think of enmeshed boundaries in Bad Buddy, I think of Dissaya having almost total control over Pran's physical placement. Of Ming knocking on Pat's dorm door, unannounced. Of Pat's expectation that Pa would do his laundry (which will speak to the sexism I'll talk about in a bit). @neuroticbookworm noted how hilariously Asian it was that Pat and Pa -- older brother and younger sister -- literally shared a dorm room. Pat could scuttle to Pran's solo room, to their love nest, to leave their shared room alone for Pa and Ink. But: what an Asian set-up, to have big bro sleeping on the floor, while little sister got the bed.

But besides what Western viewers might traditionally think of as "unhealthy" enmeshed boundaries, there's also a conversation about how Asian families engage -- or, don't engage -- with expectations of privacy. The biggest and most obvious example of a violation of personal privacy in BBS is that Pran's and Pat's parents forbid their children from having friendship with the kid next door. We know, in the end, that the parents cannot control that behavior of their kids, and yet, the parents try to do so anyway, with traumatic results.

@telomeke talked in our mini-village about the everyday functionality of Asian families crossing borders of assumed privacy. These are crossings that I fully relate to: for instance, I wasn't allowed to lock my bedroom door very often when I was growing up, to allow for complete access to my "private space," even and especially while I was in it.

I remember this as a thing growing up, that it's perfectly fine in [Asian countries] to drop in unannounced when it's family (though I think with widespread cellphone availability, people do check in beforehand now – however it could also be just to make sure there's someone in to receive them when they drop by!). It's a bit of a truism that the more traditional Asian parents will be in every part of your life and may not always know how to give you more distance when you grow older. ... For the more traditionally-minded, I think this phenomenon would be even more pronounced. And we definitely see this with Pat and Pa too.

The stories I heard about parents busting in on their Asian kids in compromising positions because the kids HAD to leave the doors unlocked? Stories about full-grown adults being interrupted in their intimacy because their parents came into the house? Countless stories. Us as Asians -- we might laugh about it, but there's also an unspoken and inherent sense of annoyance, of fear, of "how do I explain this now?" that's like a dull, permanent foreboding.

In thinking about how these boundary-crossings were inherited vis à vis Pat and Pran, into the next generation, of course -- all we have to think about are the many, many times we saw Pat crossing into Pran's threshold at Tinidee. That shot of Pat wrapped in his comforter as he shuffles to Pran's door.

However, @grapejuicegay flagged for me an utterly legendary Bad Buddy meta post written by @transpat now nearly two years ago, describing the Indian concept of haq, a concept I know very dearly well. To quote @transpat on the definition of haq:

in context of relationships, we use it to describe the entitlement ppl we keep close are allowed over us. in our culture, with every bond we form and built, we owe those ppl certain rights over us. like our filial duty to our parents, supporting our siblings and relatives emotionally and/or financially, the loyalty to our friends. lovers and spouses are ppl given all the rights of a family member by choice and obv other stuff like touching u in ways others can't, sharing worries and secrets you wouldn't indulge others w, the permission to carry and lighten ur burdens.

We know so well that Pat didn't just cross the hallway of Tinidee; he climbed through and over windows, over roofs, to get to Pran. And Pran... let him in. We know now what Pran's feelings were all that time, at least from 10th grade to university. Of course, Pran would let Pat in, because he had already let Pat into his heart. Maybe not into his psychological safety zone -- that had to take much longer. But in a much more primal sense, Pran had let Pat in, for so many reasons beautifully illustrated by @transpat in their piece, and for the examples up above, especially by way of the inadvertent closeness they achieved through their never-ending competing with each other.

I want to take a quick moment to highlight the two concepts I bolded above in @transpat's description of haq. I don't know if I have the words to describe this as well as @transpat, but to the point of entitlement and having rights over someone... there's a certain sense in Asian group dynamics, that one's business is everyone's business, if that makes sense. Think about cliques when you were growing up. Those cliques were formed on similar desires and interests -- being rich, beautiful, "cool," etc.

I feel like Asian group dynamics go a bit beyond this. Because you are in a group, it must go that any one single person's business is everyone's business. There is an entitlement to information about other people. In the States, we value individualism, and when these cliques are being formed in our youthful years, there's certainly a clash with people wanting to express themselves as individuals; very often, the group dynamics do not allow for individual expression. I would argue that that's even more strong in Asian circles.

If I could describe what I think was happening when Pat was climbing into Pran's window to, say, make that first deal about getting Wai to apologize -- I do very much believe that Pat felt it was his intimate right to go into Pran's room, as it had been established that they were, once more, schoolmates and neighbors, now that Pran was back in his family home. If Pran filled those roles -- schoolmate, neighbor -- it automatically clicked into Pat's social expectations that Pran was there to be talked to and engaged with, no matter if Pran would try to push him out. We know that Pran would give up on pushing Pat out, because Pran had feelings for Pat. BUT: what I love about @transpat's INCREDIBLE meditation is that Pat also clicked into unspoken social roles that allowed him to seek out a moment of friendly intimacy with Pran. (Besides the fact that it's more theorized now that Pat had unknown attraction for Pran during high school -- but I don't think attraction was what brought Pat into Pran's room to discuss that very first deal.)

I think this meditation on enmeshed boundaries, as I mentioned earlier, feeds nicely into the final points I want to make about the last cultural touchpoint for analysis, that of patriarchy and sexism in Asian families.

The BBS mini-village sliced and diced the incredibly overarching examples of patriarchy in this story, as emanating mostly from Ming: Ming's role as the head of the family and doling out roles; Ming ensuring that Pat would "not forget" Ming's reputation at university; Ming's parents doing nothing to interfere with Pa's role as serving Pat; Pat reinforcing that role to Pa in the family home.

Why Ming? As @telomeke broke it down for us: Ming is the head of the household of a Thai-Chinese family. It's not to say that patriarchy and sexism don't exist in ethnic Thai families -- but a patriarchal dynamic isn't shown in Pran's house, as Dissaya is the one who holds the emotional control over the Siridechawats. It's in the Jindapat household that we see old-fashioned roles of men and women doled out.

In traditional Chinese society (before the Communists came to power in China), sons had absolute pride of place in Chinese families, and we see Ming giving special treatment to Pat, while Pa was made to clean up after Mr. Jindapat Jr, doing his laundry, having the piece of chicken she wanted stolen by him in Ep.1, etc... Ming invited Pat home for a meal in Ep. 7, but didn't mention Pa, and Pat had to say he'd bring her along. But Pat and Pa, away from home didn't care for any of this, (e.g., when they were kids Pat let Pa win the bicycle race and skip washing up duties, in the Ep.1 flashback), and while Pa would begrudgingly do Pat's laundry, she would give as good as she got as well whenever they tussled (verbally).

As @telomeke says above, we see Pat, within his generation, to Pa, in their own private space of bicycling outside or moving into his own dorm room, quietly dismantling that patriarchy and sexism of Ming's and Pat's mom -- letting Pa win the bicycle race; talking out of earshot of their parents about Pat protecting, instead of hurting, Pran. [Another great example, a little outside of the patriarchal example but still worth noting, is Wai's role, as a stand-in for Dissaya, sticking to the definitions of the role of Pran's best friend, but showing -- within the cohort of his own generation -- that he CAN change to accept Pat in Pran's life, as opposed to Dissaya's inability to do so (scroll down through the whole liveblog post for the commentary!).]

@telomeke mentioned in our conversation about patriarchy and sexism that he was surprised that he'd see a parent as young as Ming -- a parent to a student of Pat's age, much younger than myself and @telomeke -- keep up with these traditional, old-fashioned values. I think that's a great point, especially in the way that Ming ignores Pa only until the end of the series, when he's instead cut Pat mostly out of his caring reach for disobeying him. We know from the Soonvijarn analysis and reaction videos by Aof Noppharnach and his collegial community of filmmakers, that Aof took inspiration for Ming stealing the scholarship from Dissaya from a real-life occurrence of the same story. I think Aof intentionally had such strong patriarchal structures in Bad Buddy vis à vis the Jindapats in order to highlight what a stronghold old-fashioned notions of life have on generations -- and intended to have a conversation vis à vis Pat, Pran, Pa, and Wai, that the ways in which these old-fashioned notions are updated over time, is through the work of the subsequent generations of children growing up and learning and knowing better.

The coded Asianness of Bad Buddy... god. I could sit with my fellow Asians and talk about the coded Asianness of Bad Buddy for at least weeks, if not maybe even a year or two. We could laugh about the comedy of many of the experiences or traumas we have faced vis à vis the cultural touchpoints that I've listed and analyzed, and we could also share our shared pain, our shared joys, our shared ways in which we express emotion, love, our highs and lows, through our shared Asian cultures. Talking about this makes me tremendously glad that there's national and international fandoms watching Asian shows -- even if, say, Western viewers can't exactly pinpoint what's happening by way of a culturally contextual moment in Bad Buddy, at least there's a community of Asian bloggers out here that can unwind what might be confusing.

Once more, I want to thank @recentadultburnout, @grapejuicegay, @telomeke, @neuroticbookworm, and @lurkingshan for engaging me in such amazing and extensive conversation about the best show ever Bad Buddy. More than education -- the process was INCREDIBLY fun and rewarding.

(Tagging @dribs-and-drabbles, @solitaryandwandering, and @wen-kexing-apologist by request! If you'd like to be tagged in this series, please let me know!)

[WHEW! SEVENTH INNING STRETCH, FRIENDS, stand up and stretch yer arms as I crack my knuckles one more time for this fabulous show! My last post for the BBS OGMMTVC Series -- a breakdown of my theorized reasons and timing regarding Pran leaving for Singapore -- drops next week. Stay tuned!

And after this, I take the tiniest break from the OGMMTVC to review one of the most important shows of 2023: La Pluie. And then I'm back on my tip with Secret Crush On You and an end-of-the-year rewatch of KinnPorsche. So, much more to come!

Here's the status of the Old GMMTV Challenge watchlist. Tumblr's web editor loves to jack with this list, so please head to this link for the very latest updates!

1) The Love of Siam (2007) (movie) (review here) 2) My Bromance (2014) (movie) (review here) 3) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) (review here) 4) Gay OK Bangkok Season 1 (2016) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 5) Make It Right (2016) (review here) 6) SOTUS (2016-2017) (review here) 7) Gay OK Bangkok Season 2 (2017) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 8) Make It Right 2 (2017) (review here) 9) Together With Me (2017) (review here) 10) SOTUS S/Our Skyy x SOTUS (2017-2018) (review here) 11) Love By Chance (2018) (review here) 12) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) (no review) 13) He’s Coming To Me (2019) (review here) 14) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) and Our Skyy x Kiss Me Again (2018) (review here) 15) TharnType (2019-2020) (review here) 16) Senior Secret Love: Puppy Honey (OffGun BL cuts) (2016 and 2017) (no review) 17) Theory of Love (2019) (review here) 18) 3 Will Be Free (2019) (a non-BL and an important harbinger of things to come in 2019 and beyond re: Jojo Tichakorn pushing queer content in non-BLs) (review here) 19) Dew the Movie (2019) (review here) 20) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) (review here) (and notes on my UWMA rewatch here) 21) 2gether (2020) and Still 2gether (2020) (review here) 22) I Told Sunset About You (2020) (review here) 23) YYY (2020, out of chronological order) (review here) 24) Manner of Death (2020-2021) (not a true BL, but a MaxTul queer/gay romance set within a genre-based show that likely influenced Not Me and KinnPorsche) (review here) 25) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) (review here) 26) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake Of Rewatching Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (re-review here) 27) Lovely Writer (2021) (review here) 28) Last Twilight in Phuket (2021) (the mini-special before IPYTM) (review here) 29) I Promised You the Moon (2021) (review here) 30) Not Me (2021-2022) (review here) 31) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) (thesis here) 32) 55:15 Never Too Late (2021-2022) (not a BL, but a GMMTV drama that features a macro BL storyline about shipper culture and the BL industry) (review here) 33) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) and Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (2023) OGMMTVC Rewatch (The BBS OGMMTVC Meta Series is ongoing: preamble here, part 1 here, part 2 here, more reviews to come) 34) Secret Crush On You (2022) (on pause for La Pluie) 35) KinnPorsche (2022) (tag here) 36) KinnPorsche (2022) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For the Sake of Re-Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist 37) The Eclipse (2022) (tag here) 38) GAP (2022-2023) (Thailand’s first GL) 39) My School President (2022-2023) and Our Skyy 2 x My School President (2023) 40) Moonlight Chicken (2023) (tag here) 41) Bed Friend (2023) (tag here) 42) Be My Favorite (2023) (tag here) 43) Wedding Plan (2023) 44) Only Friends (2023) (tag here)]

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kiefbowl · 1 year

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In response to your post about recently peaking: I think I'm still very much in the progress of getting into radical feminism, but one of the things that made me start to search it out was the huge discrepancy I noticed online with regard to how for example J.K. Rowling is treated by TRAs compared to any man ever who also has a "bad" opinion. That made me want to look up what so-called TERFs actually have to say, and I had to admit to myself that a lot of it made sense. A lot of things I felt uncomfortable about regarding gender politics and sexwork for example started falling into place as I read through more radfem blogs on tumblr. I want to use my free time this summer to read some proper feminist literature (very open for recommendations!)

I must say I feel hesitant sometimes to go further and actually peak though, because ever since I went on this journey a few months ago I've started to notice the misogyny in many places where I could ignore it before, and it scares me sometimes. I'm worried that if I become to aware the anger I feel about how women are treated will keep growing and I won't know what to do with it.

Sorry for rambling in your askbox! It felt kinda nice to write it all out once, I don't feel comfortable yet discussing all these thoughts with the people in my life unfortunately

Anger can be a very productive emotion if you're willing. I've been watching a youtuber who does recaps of SisterWives, and she said something in one of her videos recently that I agree with but never heard it articulated this way. I'm paraphrasing but: Emotions are like our five senses, they're there to give us information. Then, you have to process that information and decide how to act on it.

The example she gave is if you see someone far away that looks like your friend, but you're not sure - your eyes gave you information, but you have to go look closer to investigate to see if it's really them. If you feel angry, you have to investigate and take some time exploring why, and to what extent, and what you're willing to do about it.

Maybe you've never had anyone say this to you plainly but: I don't see my ideologies as an identity. I don't see my social identities as extensions of my virtue. I'm not afraid to get angry because if I'm angry it's probably something worth getting angry about. As with sadness, or happiness.

Misogyny is scary, but life has many facets, and truth is a worthwhile pursuit. I can't imagine my life another way because I can only be living this life as me, and like every life, it's full of complexities. I'm subjugated, I'm privileged, I'm a good person who has made bad choices, I'm a smart person who can be obtuse, I've been poor but never the poorest, I come from grandfathers who fought in wars and grandmothers who raised children in a bad religion yet they are all so deeply in my heart, and I've had to weigh my values against self serving decisions time and time again to get some of the comforts I have now. I have to live in the world now, and I'd rather live with open eyes despite any pain, because otherwise I miss out on joy. This is my only chance of joy, so I'm taking it. I will never turn my back on knowledge lest I leave joy on the table. Maybe one day, you'll see what I mean. Good luck sis! Thanks for sharing :)

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hey-loser · 2 years

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TLDR: SRB Zoom Chat

In case you missed it, Sarah did a webinar on Zoom a couple weeks ago hosted by The Sunday Morning Transport to answer questions about Tears Waiting to be Diamonds. You can get a 60-day free subscription to access both the story and the Zoom over on Sarah’s tumblr, but for those who are unable to access for any reason, I received a request to provide a little recap, so here goes! Tried to make it somewhat organized but also it is going to be a little chaotic haha.

New IOL Deets

The scene of Luke and Elliot getting together and confessing their feelings was almost only ONE SENTENCE LONG. Many thanks on behalf of the fandom to the anonymous critique partner of Sarah’s who told her that absolutely wouldn’t fly.

Elliot and Luke Post-IOL

Sarah says that Elliot doesn’t go over the border much, even though he is able to. Luke is afraid of Elliot going somewhere where he can’t follow, and even though Elliot doesn’t even think of it as a possibility, he tries to be respectful of it.

Pet names: Elliot sometimes will take classics and make them weird (like he does at the end of IOL). Luke will occasionally embarrassedly call Elliot “darling”.

Luke has fairly regular contact with the harpies. Elliot tends to spearhead their contact in terms of keeping up correspondence - he knows relatives even Luke doesn’t, and they often attend harpy festivals. According to Sarah, it’s a classic case of the in-law being the favorite kid. She jokes that he could have just gone to the harpies and lived with them when he was exiled, and they would have gladly taken him in.

WHY SARAH

TWTBD Parts 1 & 2 were initially meant to be published on consecutive Sundays. SARAH SUGGESTED THAT THERE BE A LONGER WAIT IN BETWEEN.

Why Elliot do that?

Even though Elliot has made some progress with his insecurities, he still thinks that Luke doesn’t truly know the worst that he can do, and just puts up with him. Over the years, they have worked through smaller issues, so he’s learned that he can be forgiven for these things (while before that he considered himself completely unloveable). Once he’s committed treason, he thinks that is the worst possible thing, something completely antithetical to Luke’s value system as a soldier, so he considers it inevitable that their relationship is over.

Sarah likened it to “the mortifying ordeal of being known” – Elliot never holds himself back from being completely known, because then he can be loved for who he is. But Elliot doesn’t think that Luke knows the worst he can be (even though Luke obviously does and accepts him for it).

Luke’s Letters

Luke starts with angry letters, then more worried, then back and forth between the two. Some of the letters Luke sends to Elliot are well thought out and composed (probably because Serene helped him), while others are basically drunk late night texts that he has to admit to Serene later with shame (side note from me: anyone wanna write the fic that comprises all his letters? or am I gonna have to do that myself).

Luke doesn’t even consider them broken up in the first place and was entirely unsurprised to hear what Elliot had done when he returned, while Elliot dramatically thinks they’ve been broken up for months. He doesn’t want to hurt himself by looking at the letters when he thinks he knows that they will say.

The meantime:

It had been a month since Elliot was exiled by the time Luke and Serene returned from war. By the time Luke arrives it has been almost four months. A lot of that time was spent figuring out what thad happened, possibly variously threatening people who had been planning on executing Elliot.

“A lot of Elliot’s diplomacy relies on the fact that there are people who will enact violence for him”

Peace is not a stable thing, and there isn’t an easy answer for it. As they get older, it becomes more difficult, since adults are held more accountable for their actions than children.

Serene and Luke actually were trying to figure out the diplomatic way to solve the situation: i.e., sending letters to form a plan once communication was initiated. After getting no response, they tried to get him pardoned, which was difficult considering someone apparently has a transcript of a long speech Elliot gave that essentially said “I did it and I’m not sorry”.

Luke and Serene would sometimes spontaneously decide they were going to go find him alone, and the other would talk them down from it, or they’d decide to go together, and Golden would convince them to wait.

Where’s Serene?

The story was unfortunately too long to include Serene, or even the few references to her that were initially included (such as Mark mentioning a rumor of the Sunborn Champion being involved with her).

Logistically Sarah couldn’t get Serene to the battle, since Luke would have flown to get to Elliot as fast as possible. She says that Serene definitely arrives within the day.

What happens after TWTBD?

Luke and Elliot have to have several conversations, starting with a yelling conversation, a tender conversation, and then the normal combination of yelling/tender/insults.

“If Elliot says loser, Luke knows that he’s okay and so pretty much the first words that Elliot said to Luke in the battlefield were reassuring because when he says loser, he means I still love you, which is what Luke was getting worried about.”

Elliot puts himself in tall towers and high places specifically so Luke can find him.

Sarah specifically quotes “This Ain’t a Love Song” by scouting for girls: “I know I’m lost, but I’m waiting to be found”.

More IOL

Sarah has said this before, but just in case anyone has missed it: she definitely has ideas of what happens to the characters in the future. She has said she has a strong story idea which would also need another novel in between to explain the middle events – so essentially a trilogy. TWTBD would take place in between these second and third books – the second would explain the events up to TWTBD, and the third would continue on from there. To be clear, Sarah has not confirmed whether this is actually in the works yet, or whether these would take full-length novel form or short story form.

On Trans and Nonbinary Individuals in IOL (specifically in elven culture):

Sarah says there would be some more freedoms for nonbinary/trans elves or dwarves than in human culture, but they would be restricted in other ways.

Sarah acknowledges that the IOL universe has been represented in a more binary way thus far; she plans to delve more into gender beyond the binary in the future after taking time to get the details and complexity right.

Long Live Evil Information

Sarah’s new upcoming novel! The protagonist is thrown into her favorite fantasy novel, but is unexpectedly classified as an evil sorceress and cast out with the rest of the villains. From how Sarah talks about it, the novel delves into villainy in fiction and what truly makes a villain. It also explores the joy of finding magic even if you think you’ve reached the stage of your life where you’re past it. (I AM SO EXCITED)

Hopefully this was somewhat coherent!

#in other lands #iol #twtbd #tears waiting to be diamonds #sarah rees brennan

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public-trans-it-deactivated20240 · 4 months

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Proper noun: Ceetee Pronouns: It/Its* Common nouns: Girlthing, Tranny, Doll Adjectives: Trans, Mixed-Race, Aegosexual, Polyamorous, Plural Verbs: Game Design, Shitposting, Flirting

🖋 Last edited: 5/20/24

Unreasonably proud of that stupid grammar joke. Anyway yes, I'm Ceetee. While I am plural, I try to avoid the use of first person plural pronouns, except when we are specifically talking about our experiences with DID/Plurality. We also do our best to conceal who is fronting at all times (you can read more about that in the links about gender and plurality at the bottom of this post).

I'm a dork with very VERY strong opinions that I am VERY VERY vocal about. If you do not share those opinions, that is perfectly fine and probably to be expected. Just know that I am very obnoxious about them, so you will see them a lot. I have a lot of confidence on my stances and it is very unearned! That said I'm always happy to actually discuss this stuff, and also perfectly understanding of people unfollowing over it! Never feel like you HAVE to follow me for whatever obligation. Curate your feed, damn it!

For the pronoun exceptions mentioned above, It/Its are my pronouns for most people. If you aren't willing to call me that, well, I can't stop you. Use whatever you want, but I will absolutely be judging you for it. Though there are some exceptions. For people I'm intimate with (Romantic partners and people I'm in a QPR with), my pronouns are It/She. If you work for my HRT clinic my pronouns are She/Her because like fuck am I risking my HRT just because my doctor doesn't understand my gender. If you are a coworker my pronouns are He/Him and also I don't have a tumblr, please block me immediately, for both of our sakes.

I have a NSFW sideblog. You can probably guess its name pretty easily. If you can't, I'm happy to give it to anyone brave enough to DM me or send me an ask off anon. In fact, you can ask me basically anything about my life and I'll happily answer. I'm a pretty open book like that.

Rambles

I tend to ramble about various things. Usually when I do, I tag it as #text essay. Sometimes about gender and my views on it, but also just... stuff in general. Here is a list of some of the general stuff. Its usually just stupid pointless stuff, but its a good look into how my brain works.

The Darkspore Rant (Long)

Pokemon Picross Monetization Model

Movement in VR

Time is Fake as Hell

Fighters Should Have Magic

Where I Stand in Regards to AI Art

Identity stuff:

Bespoke Genders (Part 1)

On Detransition (Part 2)

Plurality (Part 2.5)

Plurality and Being Transgender (Part 3)

Fandom shit:

Pokemon Eggs, and the Fundamental Nature of the Pokemon Multiverse (Long)

List of FFXIV OCs (LONG. Its also a recap of 4 years of weekly FC RP)

Posts others have made but are very relevant to me and who I am:

Back When I Was A Boy (Not every trans femme used to be a boy, but I did and that is important to me)

The Scorpion and The Frog (I desperately need to get a tattoo of a scorpion and a frog. I can't read this without crying)

Tags

#text essay - As mentioned above, I use this for when my rambles go very very very long. The ones I like the most or feel are important enough I also add to this pinned.

#Zenos ♥ - For the FFXIV Character that I am super normal about (lying).

#dnd hate train - A tag that exists for blacklisting purposes at the request of a close friend. As a designer, I fucking HATE Dungeons and Dragons. I hate it a lot. And I talk a lot about how much I hate it.

#laugh rule - For that age old tumblr rule: "If it makes you actually genuinely Laugh Out Loud, you have to reblog it."

#peer reviewed tags - another, more modern tumblr rule. If I screenshot someones tags to share them, I add this tag to it.

#dudes rock - Essentially, just a bunch of guys doing stuff that is just 'boys being boys' in the fun sense and not the rapey sense, but also just a reminder that the world is better with these dudes in it, and a way for me to find happiness is the masculinity that made my childhood miserable.

#partner gushing - For when I am being GAY AS HELL about my partners, or reblogging something and going 'its because of one of them'

#talking to myself and #talking about myself - Conversations between me and my alters, and talking about my relationships with my alters, respectively. More details here.

I also just... ramble in the tags. A lot. I just add so much commentary in the tags. You will see A LOT of rambles.

#pinned post

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danpuff-ao3 · 1 year

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ChaosBlue, my Bethy, host of @fanficmaverickpodcast...I wasn't sure I would do this one, as she's not all over Tumblr, but, well...I'd be remiss not to take a chance to talk about such a sweet friend!

I first met dear B after the episode she did with perverse_idyll. The encouragement to reach out about an episode sort of stuck with me. I was so impressed with the work on the Fanfic Maverick podcast, and it seemed super fun...What did I have to lose? So I drafted an email and then promptly hid from the internet for a while, because wow scary! My brain is quite mean and I was thinking such rudeness as "she's going to laugh at you. Like, who tf is this lady and why would anyone wanna talk to her??" I am very anxious and insecure, okay? And I live in fear of rejection.

Only...that didn't happen! She was perfectly sweet and excited and we got to planning! We had to schedule a ways out, which was fine. At least in the moment it was fine, but that much time gave me plenty of time to worry myself to death LOL. And when it came time to record, she was very patient and encouraging. We had all sortsa tech issues to sort out, and then my nerves to settle.

Thus was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Sometime before our interview, I believe...(maybe, my recollection of the timeline is a bit fuzzy)...okay, so at some point, I reached out after listening to another FFM episode to explode astrology nerdery all over her. To which she was very receptive! And if you know me, you know I love to talk! The first several times I reached out via email just to chat, I was so worried I was being a bother. We're well past that now! Now I text whatever randomness is on my mind, and if I'm very chatty I return to emails.

Astrology, crystals, numerology, tarot, philosophy, all manner of things! We talk about life, and history, and a shared enthusiasm of terribly human characters.

What you need to know about Bethy is...she is the GOAT, fr. (And not just because she's a Capricorn, though that certainly helps.) She is a KING. She is Daddy. She is badass and amazing. Super professional and personable on the podcast. So creative, and so much enthusiasm for life and for people. She has an endless well of curiosity and compassion.

We've talked a lot about my anxiety and how long and how hard I've fought through it. How much it took for me to reach out to her in the first place. And I'm glad I did. Not only was being on the podcast twice (so far!) a great experience, but more importantly it earned me an incredible friend who I am lucky to have. And it's comforting to know that...facing those fears and trying new things can bring you all sorts of blessings. The most important of which are friends.

Okay no time to cry, gotta leave RECS.

The Fanfic Maverick Podcast

Ep. 3 - #CobraKai - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Storyshark2005 (@talkinfanfic) - I had 0 interest in Cobra Kai but listening to this? Suddenly interest!

Fanfiction History with Talkin' Fanfic PART TWO (@talkinfanfic) and Part 1 on Talkin' Fanfic here.

Ep. 20 - #GameOfThrones - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Priestess_of_Groove

Ep. 21 - #HarryPotter - Interview With Fanfiction Writer SouthronWildling - Drarry a/b/o fic!

Ep. 25 - #HarryPotter - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Perverse_Idyll (@perverse-idyll) - probably my favorite episode so far!

Year-End Recap: Behind The Scenes Chat - 1 year anniversary episode with ChaosBlue and her brother! Very wholesome stories and a sweet sibling vibe! Gave me all the feelings. (Also I too have a brother David so I was weirdly extra excited??)

Ep. 28 - #HP: NextGen & MHA - Interview With Fanfiction Writer MicheleBlack (@micheleblack)

Ep. 29 - #TheTerror - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Snagov (@ripeteeth) - another case of "wow I had no interest in this fandom before, but now...?" Also teeth is amazing!

Ep. 30 - #HP: Tom Riddle - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Phantomato (@phantomato) - oh wow lotsa good stuff in this one! Gave me all the Voldemort feels when I hadn't really had much interest in the character prior. This episode had the biggest impact on my actual reading habits as I started to look more into Voldemort-centric fics than I had before, and I'm quite glad for it!

Ep. 32 - #HP: Snarry - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Danpuff - oh look, it's me!

KC PLanet Comicon Recap With Talkin' Fanfic - ngl I wish I had been there for Comicon last year and this year! Seems so fun!

Ep. 35 - #OurFlagMeansDeath - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Mia_Ugly (@mia-ugly) - I knew mia_ugly from Snarry fic (of course) but now OFMD???? I ran to those fics, let me tell you. (I really do need to read more OFMD fics, fr.)

October Frolic: Controversial Fanfic Ships & Tropes - me again! We do love our controversial stuff!

Ep. 46 - #Supernatural - Interview With Fanfiction Writer Thanks Tacos

Ep. 49 - #Sherlock - Interview With Fanfiction Writer AtlinMerrick

Ep. 51 - #HP: Snarry & Severitus - Interview With Fanfiction Writer SerenaEW - loved this one! I was so excited to see she'd interviewed Serena! What a sweetie (the both of them.)

Truly a great podcast, even if you're not familiar with specific fandoms. They're still cool to hear about and it's always so fascinating to hear from other creators. And through it all lives on ChaosBlue's great love and appreciation for fandom, creation, learning, and people.

I love you, buddy!

for an explanation about Mutuals March, or to figure out why i wrote you a thing, please check out this post.

#mutuals march #chaosblue #fanfic maverick podcast #danni loves her friends so much #i did NOT cry writing this #i didn't #i promise #i very stoically sucked back all the tears #i think #okay maybe one or two escaped #maybe

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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 3 months

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06/15/2024 - 06/16/2024 Weekend OFMD Recap

TLDR; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Samba Schutte; Con O'Neill; Nathan Foad; Vico Ortiz; Eliza Cossio; OFMD Billboard Status; Articles; Teal Oranges & Garlic Soup Week Reminder; Fan Spotlight; Pride Month; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

== David Jenkins ==

Chaos Dad (or Pirate Dad) popped out to send us some love on Father's Day <3 Thank you @ NoraKitty9 for sending him some love notes.

Source: David Jenkins' Twitter

== Rhys Darby ==

Rhys and Rosie are out and about with friends!

Source: KieranHutchinson's Instagram

Rhys was also on the Talking Strange Paranormal Show, where he was asked about OFMD. Warning, the commentary by Rhys is both wonderful, and heart breaking. It'll make you feel lots of things. Just FYI.

Source: AdoptOurCrew's Instagram

== Con O'Neill ==

This Father's Day, Con is taking some time with Cooper to watch the game and send everyone some love.

Source: Con O'Neill's Instagram

== Nathan Foad ==

Just some love from Nathan <3

Source: Nathan Foad's Instagram Stories

== Samba Schutte ==

Our dear Samba shared some baby pics of him with his dad as well as him with his baby and Aria! Emoji's for privacy purposes for the little babe. Happy Papa's day Samba!

Source: Samba Schutte's Instagram

== Jes Tom ==

Jes has been busy busy and is going to be performing on June 30th. Check it out Corporate Pride with Jes Tom and Tessa Skara

Jes was also out at the 2024 Vision Awards!

Source: Jes Tom's Instagram Stories

== Vico Ortiz ==

Vico and Ane wishing everyone a Happy Daddy's Day!

Source: Enbybruje's Instagram Stories

== Eliza Cossio ==

A rare sighting from one of our lovely writers, Executive Story Editor, Eliza Cossio!

Source: Elidelsol's Instagram

== Hollywood Billboard's changed ==

Whelp, the Hollywood OFMD Billboard is finally gone. So ends an era. There's been speculation that because there's been so much fan FYC campaigning Max didn't need it anymore? Or maybe they paid for it just until Emmy Nominations went through and that's why it's been around so long.

Source: @ofmd-ann's Tumblr

== Articles ==

Institutional owners may consider drastic measures as Warner Bros. Discovery, Inc.'s (NASDAQ:WBD) recent US$2.6b drop adds to long-term losses

== Teal Oranges & Garlic Soup ==

Reminder! One Week Away!

Source: Teal Oranges & Garlic Soup Week Twitter

== Fan Spotlight ==

== Cast Cards ==

Tonight's cast card is Alyssa Lane! One of our wonderful producers on OFMD! Thanks @melvisik!

Source: @melvisik's Twitter

== Blueberreads ==

Since today's Father's Day in the US, I thought I'd point out this awesome pixel art that @blueberreads has done of Chaos Dad <3

Source: Bluberreads Twitter

== Pride Month ==

= Eros The Artist =

@erostheartist is back with more beautifully colorful work for Pride Month! You may recognise them from their Mermay work last month! Check them out on their socials! https://linktr.ee/eros_the_artist

Source: ErosTheArtist Tumblr

== Love Notes ==

Hey there lovelies. I hope you all got some good sleep this weekend, it's the beginning of another week coming up and you deserve to relax a bit. Remember that you deserve to relax, alright? Whether you've been incredibly productive, or done nothing productive at all. You deserve to relax, you deserve to take a break. Your "value" is not measured by your productivity. We all make our way through this life at our own pace and there's no shame in whatever speed you're doing it at. You deserve kindness from everyone else as well as yourself, and if you don't feel like facing the day, and you can take a break-- do it. Sometimes you need to listen to your body, even when it feels like you have too much to do. It'll be okay, and you aren't a bad person for taking that break. Sending lots of hugs and good vibes your way lovelies. Rest well. One last thing, I know today can give mixed feelings to a lot of people so I'll be brief as best I can and just send some other folks words.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Dani DiPirro (@positivelypresent)

instagram

Source: Positively Present's Instagram

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Tonight just needed some laughter tonight. Hope you enjoy these two and their giggles <3

Gifs courtesy of some of the most amazing folks @funforahermit and @meluli <3

#ofmd daily recap #ofmd #our flag means death #rhys darby #samba schutte #david jenkins #con o neill #nathan foad #jes tom

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firepony67 · 1 year

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Part 3 of scenes from utsukare eternal!! This is less favorite scenes now and just bits that I remember enjoying, so that I can come back and reminisce about the movie in the however-many-months before it comes out on DVD.

I’m very sorry to anyone who wants a more cohesive view of the movie, my brain is too chaotic to do a step by step summary, but @anotherblblog did an actual recap/summary. My posts are more like a diary of my own scattered thoughts, because I’m used to my tumblr posts being basically just me talking to myself.

Once again, SPOILER WARNING

First of all, and I’m not putting this on the list officially, but just Kiyoi’s outfits in general!! Stunning, amazing fashion as usual, he’s just gorgeous and his clothes are amazing. Also Anna’s costumes were also fantastic- the monochrome black, widow-ish looks really suited her!

1. Kiyoi and Anna’s manager being incredibly overworked all the time. That man never stops scrambling around frantically, it’s honestly kinda hilarious but also I feel bad for him. I mean he did have to deal with 2 serious “scandals” in a very short amount of time, including Anna with her boyfriend and then a fake scandal of Anna and Kiyoi dating, plus they don’t seem to have any other staff other than the boss dealing with the two actors (kind of bad planning if you ask me, especially given how famous Anna supposedly is).

2. Kind of part of one of my previous favorite scenes- when Anna and her boyfriend are reuniting, Anna is hiding at first and then Hira or Noguchi (Hira’s cameraman boss) tells the boyfriend something like “there’s someone here who wants to see you/talk with you” and the camera pans dramatically to some tulle curtains beautifully draped over an entranceway. And you think it’s gonna be Anna appearing out of the fabric but then Kiyoi just pokes his head out with the cutest expression. And when I tell you the disappointment and wtf energy on the boyfriend’s face was so strong 😂. But then Kiyoi is just like- oh sorry- and shuffles over awkwardly to stand next to Hira so that Anna could get her proper dramatic entrance. It was so cute.

3. The opening scene. Beautifully pastel scene of Hira and Kiyoi waking up (naked) in their bed, and Hira rolling over to cuddle Kiyoi, complete with kind of hazy/dreamy lighting, calming atmospheric music, and a tulle curtain/veil thing covering both of them to add to the dreamlike feel. Some people in the mydramalist comments didn’t like the veil thing, because it was kind of just functioning as a call back to a scene in the series and didn’t actually serve a purpose or make any sense in the movie 😅. And that’s a valid point, but honestly I’m perfectly fine with doing things purely for the aesthetics. Sometimes, artistic choices aren’t super logical lol. It was a beautiful scene, and frankly it’s not too far fetched to me that Hira and Kiyoi might cover themselves with a pretty curtain like that while sleeping together simply for the vibes 👍

4. Hira and Kiyoi apartment hunting together 😭😭 Although obviously Hira’s house is the best, it was so cute to see them going around together thinking about the things they needed in a home (Kiyoi’s list including a bathtub I think, referencing the earlier bathtub steamy scene 🫢). It was so cute how Hira zooms into the kitchen to test out how cooking for them would feel, acting out looking into the living room area to make sure he would be able to see Kiyoi while making food! The domestic fluff!! I’m so soft 🥺

5. Okay I know that Anna’s obsessive fan turned out to be awful later, but I honestly really liked his and Hira’s introduction. It was painfully awkward, but the way they bonded over their shared fan interests and devotion to their idols was honestly really sweet, and then how they cautiously shook hands afterwards- I was kind hoping Hira would gain a friend with a similar personality to him, but instead he gained an enemy that he would later try to murder for hurting Kiyoi and then subsequently almost be murdered by. So that’s fun 🙃

#utsukushii kare eternal #utsukushii kare #美しい彼 #my beautiful man #my beautiful man: eternal

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gallavichthings · 2 years

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Writer’s Spotlight - Mhunter10

Be honest, y’all thought I had abandoned this series, didn’t you? But I hadn’t! In fact, this interview was done a long time ago, but posting was delayed for several reasons. It’s finally here though, and I’m very excited for you to read this one, because the writer we’re spotlighting today is a fandom veteran and one of our most prolific writers. Enter: Malenah, aka @mhunter10!

GT: Ok, first of all, I've got to say, I'm so happy you agreed to talk to me! I missed you! How have you been?

M: Been up and down and dealing with some stuff, but I think I'm okay. I definitely miss writing.

GT: And we miss your writing. Is that why you stopped for a while, life just got in the way?

M: Yes, but also the fandom and show wasn't fun anymore. Tumblr policies got annoying and people weren't finding my stuff....people actively stealing my work and reposting without asking.

GT: Oh, that sucks. 😔 When did you join the fandom? And what made you want to? What was it about Shameless (or Gallavich) that captivated you?

M: Oof maybe 2013ish? 2015ish? Whenever Shameless first season was on. I actually didn't even have Showtime, I would literally sit on Tumblr and wait for someone to recap the episode or link a bootleg clip. I've always been into good queer stories as a queer, and Cam and Noel's dynamic was interesting and the sort of cute that makes you squeal like a little girl.

GT: They've always had a lot of chemistry. Did you start writing fics right away? What made you want to start?

M: I was actually writing for another fandom/couple for a while way before Shameless. For Gallavich I was mainly just making headcanons that sometimes turned into drabbles. Eventually I wrote longer fics and started posting to AO3. I'd respond to someone else's headcanon or idea with a short fic.

GT: A lot of people still do that nowadays. That was one of my favorite things about your fics, actually, the fact that most of them were short and I could get my quick Gallavich fix without compromising my lack of a long attention span. 😅

M: Haha I was the queen of the drabble.

GT: What fandom were you writing for before, if you don't mind me asking? Was it the first you wrote fics for?

M: A soap opera called As the World Turns😅. I was writing fic when it was still airing new episodes in the middle of the day on CBS. I wrote for Luke and Noah and the fics are archived somewhere on the internet forever.

GT: Was it also the first fandom you read fics for?

M: I think so? Lol that sounds right. I also wrote some fics for Eyewitness, the US version.

GT: Let me backtrack, because we went straight into your experience with fandom, but I want to also know a bit about you. Please tell us a bit about yourself.

M: Oh Haha well I'm 30. Black, bi, live in Maryland. Have a bachelor's and currently getting my master's. Write, paint, sculpt, collect, read, work… mostly work. Work work work. Fall is my favorite season. Libra. Currently have 8 tattoos. Live with my partner, 3 years together. Umm...I've got arthritis and hip dysplasia so lol....anyone wanting to murder me now has everything they need to know and opportunity.

GT: Hahahaha That was very in-depth, indeed! What's your masters about?

M: Organizational Sciences.

GT: I don't know what that is, but it feels like something I should study. 😅 What is it? And do you already work in that field or are branching out?

M: It's akin to industrial psychology...basically, how workplaces work and how to improve the work environment. Definitely has a lot of intangible skills everyone should have an understanding of if you work. It's very meta sometimes lol. Leadership, communications, change management, negotiation, etc.

GT: Oh, that's interesting! You mention you also paint and sculpt? Talk about a well-rounded artist! What got you into those?

M: I've just always been artsy fartsy crafty.....schmafty. Fun fact: walked out of my pottery class first day cuz the professor rubbed me the wrong way....took ballet instead. I'm mostly a painter but I have a lot of little things I've made out of clay just for fun.

GT: Like what?

M: Mostly small food 😆. I paint whatever. I was an instructor for about 2 years.

GT: If you feel comfortable, could you maybe share a pic or two?

GT: They're all beautiful, but the one with the blue-haired woman is GORGEOUS! 😍

GT: Let's talk about Shameless. Do you have a favorite season and/or episode?

M: Yikes, I honestly don't remember much but definitely before the whole show went off the rails. I think 1-4 are standouts, maybe 5 or 6. I only really stayed for Gallavich.

GT: I feel you, I actually stopped watching after S5.

M: Trevor was the worst.

GT: Why do you say that?

M: Not the actor ,obviously, but the whole storyline was not done right at all, imo. The whole jesus stuff was stupid. Frank continuing to live was stupid. All the stupid and inconsistent decisions compounded into me not giving a shit anymore.

GT: Did you actually watch all the seasons? Because I myself skipped S6 to S9. What did you think of the ending?

M: The ending I saw was the wedding stuff, but I haven't watched anything after.

GT: Do you intend to or will you just consider the wedding the end and that's it? Either way, what did you think of the wedding? Or the fact that there was one. The early-seasons fan in me was in shock it even happened. Once Mickey came back for 9x06, I figured that was as good as it was going to ever get.

M: I knew they would do it. They baited us, kept us on the hook and reeled us back in with the Gallavich crap. I thought the wedding was fine, didn't understand half the people there. Oh wait I also watched some of the stuff with them in the apartment and trying to adjust to that which was actually pretty interesting. I didn't really keep up after that, just saw some gifs here and there. I think they had sex in an ambulance with a dead person? I don't really understand why they have to keep doing illegal stuff. I refuse to believe Fiona would not even show up or call or check in, but I understand why Emmy wanted to cut full ties with the show

GT: I agree, I never understood why not have Fiona keep in touch, or just have one of them mentioned she called. But it's the same thing they did with Mickey at the end of season 5. Instead of cutting Noel from the show, but still having Mickey be somewhat present through mentions, they decided he'd be arrested AND Ian would break up with him. And then they mentioned things about him that weren't true. That made no sense at all. How would you have written their ending if you got to choose?

M: I've written their ending lol; just a short fic reimagining the day after the wedding. I liked the apartment stuff. I would've written them trying to find Mandy eventually leaving the show due to a positive sign she wanted to reconnect. They need to leave the Southside. But during their search, Mickey goes to school. Maybe some shenanigans ensue, but ultimately he does well enough to graduate. I'd see Ian writing a book.

GT: Ian writing a book? That's something I never thought of. A biography or fiction?

M: Maybe a memoir.

GT: What about other moments of the show? If you could change one thing the show did with them, what would it be?

M: Everything. Anything I ever had an issue with, I usually turned into some sort of fic in retaliation. I did a fic rewriting their meeting at the docks, and also one where Ian finds Mickey in Mexico. I did one of when Ian came home from the hospital and Mickey is taking care of him, but ends up helping Fiona with some chores.

GT: Ok, but if you could only choose one? Sophie's choice, I know. Well, reverse Sophie's choice. 😅

M: Idk I'd redo all the stuff with Yevgeny and not make Mickey forget all about him.

GT: Great point. Just one more thing that doesn't make sense in this show. Ok, now let's talk fanfiction. What kind of fics do you write the most? I mean, I know you're the drabble queen, but what else?

M: My fics range from absolute crack fucking with the readers, to gut wrenching, to smut, to whatever passion project I think 2 people will read. I've written some lengthy stuff. Two wips I'm ashamed to admit I forgot where I was going with them as the reason I haven't updated them are White Coats and, by far my most popular fic, The Sugar Daddy. I also have several series going with trans Mickey, fratboy Mickey, geek Mickey, etc.

GT: I can relate, I also have a WIP I don't know how to continue. I have the plot planned, but... I don't quite know how to get there. Do you have a personal favorite among your fics, one that you were especially proud to write?

M: Definitely The Sugar Daddy, but they're all my babies to some extent, even the less popular and early ones. I liked writing pregnant Mickey. And I like some of my fantasy spins, like Mickey meeting Santa lol, and Ian in Oz.

GT: If you had to rewrite a fic you wrote, which one would you choose and how would you change it?

M: I have over 400 fics so I know I myself am forgetting a lot of them lol.

GT: I have way less and I forget mine too, so I can only imagine. 😁

M: When I come across an oldy it's always fun to read it with fresh eyes haha. I don't think I would rewrite any.

GT: No regrets, huh?

M: Pretty much.

GT: Fair enough. Now, you said it yourself, you have A LOT of fics out there. Where do you get your ideas from?

M: I tend to write in a zone so whatever I put out there is what I wanted out there in the moment. I have an idea and just go with it and see how it comes together

GT: You said you write in a zone. How do you get in that zone? (asking for a friend)

M: I've had somewhere I just could not figure out how to get it out of my head in a way that makes sense so those just never see the light of day or they find their way magically into something else. It's probably an undiagnosed adhd thing but I hit a groove and can keep going as long as I'm excited. That excitement is generated by how much I think what I've written is going to make people shit their pants. I have a fic titled Ian Snaps Mickey's Neck.

GT: Lol that sounds like a good motivator. So I'm assuming you don't plan your fics much?

M: Not like pages and pages of details before I even begin, but I know major points and how I want to lead up to some of them. That's not to say I'm not just winging it most of the time. Sometimes I'll come up with something better or different based on reactions if it's a multichap. Prompts are a little tricky sometimes cuz the person is expecting the thing so you need to do the thing.

GT: What about research? Do you do any before or during writing?

M: A little if I want to make sure I'm saying something correctly, either words or phrases. Places sometimes, or if I want to actually describe something specific. For example, in the Sugar Daddy I have a few links to items Ian gets Mickey just to add to the visuals but I'm not expecting everyone reading to care enough about the minutiae of how much it costs to take a bus in Chicago. I stick with what's relevant and if I think people will get the point without me turning in a research paper.

GT: Do you have a preference for writing from Ian's or Mickey's pov?

M: No preference just whatever the story calls for [whose pov do I write more, it's definitely Mickey].

GT: Do you write other characters aside from Ian and Mickey?

M: I've written a couple fics that include other Shameless characters and definitely some original characters.

GT: Which Shameless characters do you write more often? Do you write fics just about them or only include them in your Gallavich fics?

M: Ian and Mickey for sure, others as needed for the story but I know I've done a fic from Debbie's perspective a long time ago? Or Carl....

GT: You mentioned you sometimes include OCs. How do you create them? Do you base them on real people?

M: No, definitely not. I mean, if there is any originality in an original character anymore ie. typical archetypes. I at least try to make them their own character and not just an npc.

GT: You write a good deal of mpreg, a trope that a lot of people don't like. What attracts you to it?

M: Hahaha a good deal? I wrote 2 at the most. To me it's just another way of writing something. I've read some weird shit that I definitely would never write myself.

GT: Really? It was more in my mind. 😅 What are some tropes you enjoy writing?

M: I like writing scenarios that actually happen to me sometimes. Makes things feel more real. I guess I subscribe to the usual angsty stuff. But I genuinely like writing fun and sweet, sexy and loving, intimate.

GT: Is there anything you think you could never write?

M: Incest, child stuff, dom/sub, animals.

GT: Do your preferences apply when reading as well? What kind of things do you enjoy reading about?

M: Haha I've stumbled into some fics where I'm not sure if the subject or the writing turned me off more.

GT: Like what? What makes you quickly hit the back button?

M: If it's great writing, I might skip around some bits. Otherwise yeah, I'm not reading anything that I'd have to announce to a room at gunpoint. But that's for my own peace, some things just should not be written.

GT: One more thing, out of curiosity: where does your url come from? I get the M from your name, but why hunter10?

M: It's my last name and birth month and username for everything because I'm a basic and terrible person 😆.

GT: What are you currently reading?

M: The one where Ian is the reading tutor and has a cat, Paragraphs by @palepinkgoat. I also like their other stuff and am always extremely jealous, feel free to mention that haha. Jealous and supportive, but still… lol. And I really do want to finish The Sugar Daddy but for now I'm going to get back into writing slowly with updating some of my series. Before that I was reading Deaf Group by @thevioletjones, another fav. Unfortunately a lot of my list is orphaned, deleted or no updates since 2015.

GT: Yeah, a lot of people left the fandom around the time, which is sad, but understandable. I understand orphaning your fics, and of course shit happens, so abandoned WIPs are normal, but I don't get the reasoning behind just deleting something you created, unless you later realized it was in poor taste. But well, to each their own. Ok, so I was going to ask you about your plans for more, but you've already said you want to finish The Sugar Daddy. Any other plans?

M: No other plans really. I always think I'm going to write this idea I've had but I'm not skilled enough to do it

GT: And finally, leave a message for those reading this interview, please.

M: Ehh....hi,this is Malenah and you're watching Disney channel.

Idk. Be careful, be safe, be aware of your surroundings. I love you.

Drink some water and keep going.

#gallavich #ian x mickey #shameless us #mickey milkovich #ian gallagher #writer's spotlight #mhunter10 #mod post #gallavich fanfiction

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incomingalbatross · 10 months

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Commute Radio Recap: Week Ten!

Since I'd finished all my music recs, I decided to branch out to some artists I either hadn't heard at all, or wanted to listen to more of - some from Tumblr, some inspired by the things I'd already been listening to lately.

Presidential's James Monroe episode. I...am not sure how much I retained (I gotta make better notes right after listening, not a week or two later), but it was interesting.

Artifexian: So the thing about this podcast is, episodes are on hour and a half long and there's no way to predict how much of it will have anything to do with the episode description. Sometimes the hosts spend a while talking about their lives, or other projects, or something. On the other hand, they're very pleasant to listen to, and when they do talk about stories and worldbuilding I'm always drawn in. So I like this one! I just have to be ready to keep my expectations a little in abeyance when starting an ep.

Art of Manliness: I still go back and forth on this one - not sure if they have a clear distinction between accidents and essence when it comes to their topic :P - but this ep was fine, and I'll listen to more.

Being Human: Continues to be interesting! I am along for the ride on anything concerning Catholic psychiatry, it's a genuinely important topic.

Close Reading: I love this one. Continues to be three highly intelligent people discussing Little Britches in chunks. Will be listening to their thoughts on other books whenever I reach the end of this one.

Maisie Peter's The Good Witch: Apologies to the mutuals and followers who love her, but my verdict on this one was that she is just not my vibe. I think I like her in small doses, but more as an element in a playlist than as a primary source of music, you know?

OTGW soundtrack: Re-listen, but 'tis the season! (This was literally on Halloween actually.) Love this one, always. I have Thoughts on some songs but not concise enough to put here.

Scythian's Roots and Stones, Old Tin Can, and Dance All Night: So Scythian is a "Celtic rock/Americana" band founded twenty years ago by a bunch of Christendom College graduates (I believe), and they're FUN if you want high-energy 19th-century folk and things derived from that sound. Lots of immigrant songs mixed with more modern ones. I'd listened to Dance All Night (a best-of album) before, but not the others. Hoping to get through their discography sooner or later.

And then I also relaxed my rules and did some relistens to old standby music, which doesn't get a spot here because I wasn't doing it for my Education or Cultural Enrichment. :P But I think continuing to line up albums to listen to for exploratory purposes is fun, and the best kind of listening for my commutes!

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djnicklesanddimes · 1 year

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Since tumblr is going to be a jerk and not let me post my cosplay, I'll go ahead and write down my review for the movie.

I'm writing this a couple days out, so sorry (and correct me, i love discussing this movie :3)if something's not correct. I was also writing this in-between breaks at work lol.

There will be spoilers, so you know the deal. I will tag it as such but you have been warned. :3

I'm also putting a read more divider cause it is looooong lol.

My fiancée and I went to go see the dub. He hasn't seen the series since s1 and I made him watch the recap but I felt the recap didn't explain everything to really get a full understanding of the importance of this movie and the characters, but I do appreciate having it. (I think I'll use it in the future for explaining to those I talk to that haven't seen the series, cause have you ever had to explain the series to someone that has never watched it before? Lol)

So we'll start with The Dub

I was favor of the dub in the beginning. I don't mind either sub or dub, but dub is easier for me sometimes when I'm drawing or doing a craft and don't have my eyes always on the screen. I was happy to see that all the original cast came back for this, as I know through their dvd commentaries that they have a real passion for the series. The start of the movie felt a little awkward to me, almost like the VAs were trying to find their way back into their voices. Frederica's voice I think was a little off, a little quieter and softer than I would have imagined hers to be. I know a few people don't like Kate Oxley's voice for Akane but I think she did an excellent job at Akane's break down in the end. It felt very raw and believable.

Plot

Overall I was very pleased with the plot of the movie. After getting context for everything in the movie after reading spoilers from Japanese only showings with no subtitles, I felt that the movie went way deeper than my first impressions. It was a nice surprise to have what feels like a less all over plot that we have gotten in recent years. My fiancée throughly enjoyed it even though he didn't know most of the backstory and I had to fill him in on a few things. His comment for Shindo after the wedding was "nooooo, he kills himself?" Which I replied "yep". There was foreshadowing for both Saiga's and Shindo's deaths but I felt that it was done right. Not too obvious, but enough that it wasn't overdone and you could pick up on it. One piece of context that was filled in for me that I found interesting is that Shindo was an upperclassmen to Saiga, and Saiga warns I think Akane? About Shindo and how he uses people and in sometimes dangerous ways, and that Saiga wonders if one day he'll end up getting hurt from it. And then guess what happens!! I know Saiga warns Akane about Shindo because of his shady methods to get what he wants, and I can't remember when in the timeline, but she asks Mika to do a background check on him.

As for Shindo's foreshadowing, he has a conversation with Akane and invites her to Kei's and Mai's wedding, where he gives that weird speech lol. Sadly I can't remember too many details but I know the way he has his last talk with Akane made me pick up that his suicide was soon, a product of sibyl supplying him with a gun and making him accept responsibility for all he tried to do. You couldn't wait until maybe a day or two after the wedding?? Lol.

I liked that Saiga and Kogami got to talk again. One of the only remnants of shinkane in this film (yeah there wasn't a lot sadly :() comes from Saiga telling Kogami that he shoukd apologize to Akane (which leads to that awkward phone call where it seems like he kinda? tries and fails as they made him a stoic and manly pride type of personality. I don't really like how cold he is at the start of the film either but I almost see a little bit of it as maybe he's been away and around so much violence for so long that this is the only, in his weird Kogami way for him to act. I do think it's no excuse tho for erasing any trace of the shinkane we have, as that relationship is special to many of us and not always for romantic reasons.) I did have a laugh at later when Saiga asks him if he did apologize to which he replies "I don't know what you are talking about". Come on Kogami! You know he can tell you are lying!

I did like that our bad guys had a more religious and cult like approach this time. I feel that's a topic that hadn't been touched in the series yet and finally the movie's title Providence made sense. These guys are dangerous enough to pose a threat, and our heroes get hurt several times. Plus they were a special group for SAD that went rouge, which is so interesting to me. Tonami is the leader of this group and aims to get the Stonskaya documents that can predict wars before they happen or can escalate them to one's favor. He also either helped develop or came across an ai (can't remember details) that he found could pose as a God and he controls his soldiers with a chip(?) in their heads that he can turn on and off at will. Kei's brother Akira is part of this group but is revealed later that he was a double agent( I was surprised at that!) And that he burned his face so he would not be recognized. Shindo sadly kills him later as he fights control for his body from Tonami.

(Trying to finish up here, god this review is long, thank to those that are still with me lol)

I'm gonna try to jump ahead to the end. The scene of Akane's unspeakable deed (lol) was very well done. You have Sibyl forcing her to take Shindo's position, which I got the impression that she didn't want it. And yet it was another Sibyl covering up something bad, sweeping it under the rug and trying to silence Akane more. Akane's whole thing through this movie is that there still needs to be laws, cause Sibyl will and has failed to protect people. So she realizes that she has to do the unthinkable and show that Sibyl is not as invincible as people are pushing for it. Her letter to Kogami was a great scene, with him realizing at the last minute what she was going to do and that he couldn't do anything to stop it as he was locked up. My fiancée was so surprised and it was great to hear his reaction, as he hadn't seen s3 and didn't have the context clues that we all have had lol.

Overall, I thought it was a very good film and great tie in to some pieces missing. I'm still not sure why Sugo and Gino joined SAD tho? That part might have gotten lost on me.

Shinkane

Sadly there wasn't much. I could say that was my only disappointment, along with Kogami's character towards Akane. As other's have said, it seems that he realizes too late. Like maybe he was trying to keep his distance so he can continue to think that she's the same pure inspector he's always known. I love Saiga's quote to him that "she's not God or Budda" so hopefully moving forward there will be something (despite what the writers say!!) as he greats her so warmly at the end of s3. As he swears to get her out and then he's not the one who does it! He might have some competition lol.

I also want to point out that I loved the soundtrack! I was happy to see Ling Tosite Sigure and Egoist back, cause I feel like it's not fully Psycho Pass without them. But! I was listening to the Providence soundtrack before I saw the movie and it's soooo beautiful, so give it a listen if you have always loved the soundtrack like me. :3

So those are some of my thoughts. I will gladly discuss them with anyone if they want. Also to correct anything I got wrong lol.

#psycho pass #my review!

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