#I know i could've loved you
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listening to silver springs by fleetwood mac on repeat hurting my own feelings with insane hypotheticals
#Can you tell me was it worth it#Baby i don't wanna know#Time cast a spell on you#That you won't forget me#I know i could've loved you#But you would not let me#😔#fleetwood mac#stevie nicks#silver springs
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do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.
His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.
His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.
Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.
Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.
Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.
But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.
But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.
He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.
And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.
And the truth is worse than all of the lies.
How horrifying.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#danny fenton is a clone#clone danny fenton#clone danny#thinking about the inherent trauma that comes with growing up as a clone and not knowing and questioning everything about yourself#thinking about the amount of effort and lying that Jack and Maddie would've had to to do if they wanted to pass Danny off as their bio son#the MEDICAL RECORDS#danny's medical history is completely different from theirs. any generational health problems the waynes have would/could be passed down to#danny and he's completely oblivious to it up until the reveal. he'd have no idea about any medical risks until they hit him before that.#so many little things and inconsistencies that would just build and build and build until it finally came to a head and the truth came out#forever and ever and ever fascinated by the underlying horror of being a clone. there's a horror in being cloned but there's also a horror#in BEING a clone. like yes he could've always known from the start and that comes with its own set of issues BUT. just. him not knowing#for the longest time. the lies and deceit and betrayal. you know how adopted kids come out and talk about how they didn't know they were#adopted for the longest time and how traumatizing and betrayed they felt when they're finally told 15-20 years down the line? yeah that#i imagine finding out you're a clone is a lot like that.#i read a book in middle school once abt a girl moving to a new town with her family and getting these horrible nightmares and noticing how#everyone was acting strange around her. one of her nightmares was about the 30yo police officer being a shambling corpse talking to her#and at the end of the book she finds out she's actually the clone of a dead older sister and the police officer was her sister's boyfriend.#and she was in gymnastics but quit and her parents were so disappointed bc the og sister was a champion/award winning gymnastics player#and i never did finish the book but god am i reminded of that.#i love reading the dpxdc clone danny posts and they usually have him brush off being a clone which is literally totally fine but duUUDE#just imagine his own horror over it. its SOOO good
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still absolutely losing my mind over Lilia
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#sebek: wow we're so lucky to see lilia-sama at his fighting prime. so commanding! so powerful!#lilia: (straight up stuffs a frog in his mouth without breaking eye contact)#seriously though i did not think it was possible for me to enjoy lilia even more. and yet.#'dragon eggs need love in order to hatch'#ten year old me: gasp. i knew it.#the IMPLICATIONS though!#forget true love's kiss we have true love's baby dragon over here#also twst. twst please. i do feel i need to call you out a little bit on malleus' age#i don't really have a problem with it i was just. surprised.#i mean i GUESS the description of dragon ages was vague enough that malleus being under 200 doesn't inherently contradict it#it could've been clearer okay :(#that said it is true that the younger malleus is the more hilarious his whole world-weary immortal schtick is#'ah...you are all as infants in comparison to me. ' - malleus (age 19)#also lilia being a foundling does explain him not knowing his real birthday. so i will forgive (1) birth-related shenanigan.#auuuugh the parallels between lilia and silver#brb i need to go roll around on the ground and mutter to myself for a while
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DO NOT BE AFRAID
this is combining Ovid's Heroides and the Excidium Troie because I can't stop thinking of Hermes telling him not to be afraid. what the fuck!! Ares is wearing the crown that Paris gave him.
I have. thoughts. about Paris. he's almost got this Troilos parallel in my mind, that the event that defines him in detail exists in a lost narrative that we don't have (the Cypria), but everyone else knew. the event that defines Troilos is his death (murdered, butchered by Achilles, the violence of which haunts everything after. Achilles, child killer, you can't escape that!), and the event that defines Paris is the Judgement. what's a lost text but a kind of grave!!
idk I don't think that Paris before the Judgement would recognize himself after bc when you become god touched, it rearranges your guts. you become transformed in the worst way possible! how could you recognize yourself! but I also think that all the Parises after the Judgement would recognize each other because that event is so locked into the trauma of war and the scar it leaves on the land, it's like a scar on the narrative too. it exists like this forever, over and over again, so you exist like that forever too. Troy collects grief and despairs.
Troy as trauma: Reflections on intergenerational transmission and the locus of trauma, Andromache Karanika
and Paris is like. a miserable little god/corpse-puppet or something, like a match for the gods to throw onto gasoline.
The Excidium Troie + Ovid's Heroides:
Excidium Troie, trans. Muhammad Syarif Fadhlurrahman
Ovid, Heroides 16 (trans. Harold Isbell)
a collection of things regarding Paris that made me go 😬 but under a cut bc this is getting. very long.
The Divine Twins in Early Greek Poetry, Corolla Torontonensis
Iliad 24 and the Judgement of Paris, C.J. Mackie
Elegy and Epic and the Recognition of Paris: Ovid "Heroides" 16, Elizabeth Forbis Mazurek
Ennian Influence in "Heroides" 16 and 17, Howard Jacobson
Paris/Alexandros in the "Iliad", I. J. F. de Jong
#long post#paris of troy#komiks tag#like. DISTANTLY. its#the iliad#drawing tag#listen i know it's fun to dunk on paris. but im a chronic killjoy. i know its cringe. mea culpa etc#i would love. I WOULD LOVE. to draw a comic and not have the commentary notes be longer than the comic itself#unfortunately i like to read and i cannot stop talking about things that i read. so this will not be changing.#ngl i keep hearing the last line 'my brother says you are a just judge' as 'and brutus says he is an honorable man' and that's smth for sur#god i wish this was shorter but then i remember it could've been longer bc i started drawing this while watching#some excellent korean horror but then i looked at myself in the mirror and said 'no. get your shit together.'#but that show is what sparked this. the themes. god i love shows. a round of applause for tv shows.#in a different world theres a version of me that didn't exercise self restraint and there's 30 screen caps from a horror show here too#it’s all greek to me
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I've been binging Batman Beyond recently (Terry ily so much) and thought about how- bc of the JLU twist which I think isn't even canon to the comics BB verse but shhh bare with me- he'd technically be Damian's half brother??? Which is just so ridiculously soap opera to me. I need them to interact in a silly time travel adventure so bad you don't even understand (ID in alt)
#dc comics#damian wayne#terry mcginnis#batman beyond#batman and robin#mine#also feat the mild damian uniform redesign i like playing around with. it's fun i like her. i love u classic robin colours#the backstory for this image in my mind is that Terry knows of Damian/has maybe met him#in the future (whether we're going w the rebirth ''damian rejoins the league'' angle that i. don't love conceptually but can't judge-#-bc i haven't read. or if we go w/ some other potential future route for damian) and Terry is like. experiencing whiplash at meeting him-#-as robin. like you are 5 feet tall why r u so bossy. where is your dad good god. this is why i don't have a robin (?this is pre matt-robin)#but Terry's in an unfamiliar time trying not to cause a paradox so he puts aside his indignitude(?) at being bossed around by a kid#just long enough to make sure nothing goes horrifically wrong. hence this image takes place#<- i could've been a lot more eloquent explaining this but it's very late and i should've been asleep ages ago#anyway. absolutely crazy to me that Damian has had multiple flavours of secret brother plots and terry is a potential addition. rip damian#(also in my ideal future damian took up the nightwing mantle (EVERYONE READ NIGHTWING MUST DIE!!!) before retiring(#idk what his future career is. lowkey hes a webcomic artist in my brain but that's so horrendously self indulgent i can't condone it#also i decided to try my hands at lineart again. evil. how are you so stiff looking and difficult to do. waughh#anyway if things look weird. no they don't
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Part 1
There is a universe, somehow, where everything aligned just perfectly and left four desperate children on Silco's doorstep. A universe where Piltover is just a bit more ruthless: where Vander's connections aren't trustworthy and where his foolish sentimentality wins.
Vander's arrested, in Vi's place. He's so proud of her for trying to do the right thing - but he'll not make a sacrifice out of Felicia's daughter. The violence in the streets has to stop and Piltover won't stop until it has someone to blame for the theft. So the Hound becomes a sacrificial lamb.
But remember, his agreements are flimsier, and the trust between enforcer and undercity is as thin as the razor blade Mylo keeps in his pocket. The gold-trimmed enforcers aren't happy with a Hound dressed in wool - they want the girl. The one Jayce identified. Some pink-haired snot-nosed filthy brat. The thief. The terrorist.
They labeled her a terrorist: Vi. For a near-harmless explosion in a district she would've been beaten in, just for the grime in her hair.
And the Hound won't have that.
For the second time in his life, Vander's knuckles are stained with enforcer blood and the undercity begins to burn. Vi's next to him, eager to fight, but scared. She's just a kid after all. Always eager. Always scared.
Claggor, Mylo, and Powder come running as they limp back to the Last Drop. Powder's too busy crying into Vi's shirt to pay much attention to the screams outside. Reinforcements are just a few minutes away. The rats of the undercity retreat to spare themselves from the brutality beneath an enforcer's heel and the streets grow quieter and quieter. They all know how to slip away when the time demands it, but this is more than sneaking through the sewers and waiting for the storm to pass.
The enforcers, the council, Piltover: they'll keep coming. The blood on Vander and Vi's hands ensures that much. And they don't want him -
He looks to where Vi is hugging Powder back, a: "Sorry Powpow," being breathed. "Didn't mean to scare you -"
He can't let that happen. He can make himself the bigger problem - the biggest threat and that will buy the kids time and give those rich bastards a victory.
But then... it'll just be them.
Claggor's strong, Mylo's sly, Powder's clever, and Vi is brave. They're all tough as nails and they'll make it. At least until this underbelly starts ripping itself around. Vander's a smart man who knows what will happen in his absence, the cannibalistic tendencies of desperate people who need scapegoats.
And Vi's already willing to play the martyr. She proved that much. No, if he leaves he needs to leave them with something. Anything. Something that's as willing to fight for their future as...
That's when he gets the terrible idea. Right around the same time he hears the tell-tale racket of enforcers running down cobblestone. He grabs a bar napkin, and Claggor bars the door. He fumbles messily around for a piece of graphite or a damned pen.
Vi pushes Powder behind her and grabs a half-empty bottle from a table. There's a shatter as she arms herself with razor glass. These kids are well versed at making weapons, they have to be.
They'll only get better at it if he finishes this note. He's signing their lives away to a different demon. There's no guarantee they'll live long enough to give him the note. It's a terrible idea -
"I'll never betray Zaun's children"
Powder's climbing behind the bar with him, clinging to his leg. Mylo climbs over the other side, fiddling with a collection of rusty steak knives. Claggor's grabbed a chair and broke it, two wooden beams in either hand.
Suffocating in the streets is better than dying on a bridge.
"Take this," he gives it to Vi before slipping on his knuckles. "Find Silco. Ask around, and he'll find you."
"What?" it's a challenge from her. She's ready to fight to keep what she has.
She doesn't realize that every fight comes with a loss. And eventually, it's going to take everything from her. Once you bloody those knuckles you never stop - not really.
But not today. Today it'll only take him, and hopefully, she'll remember what they talked about. She'll remember that despite this shitshow - he's proud of her for finding a peaceful solution. He's proud of her for putting down those fists.
But there was no way in hell he was going to let her go.
"Take care of each other," he orders slipping on his other gauntlet. Mylo and Powder stare at him with wide eyes. Claggor's lip is trembling.
"Remember. Remember, to look out for each other!" he orders.
"No!" Powder seems to understand now as Vander pulls the bracings away from the door. She scrambles over the bar with a muffled wail. Mylo stops her right as Vander throws the door open.
"Vander!" Vi screams, but the hound is loose.
He's in the streets and he's set about making these fools remember why they follow the light. Why they fear the undercity so badly they chase its children to sate their fury. Dark things live in the undercity. Zaun's children are raised in air so heavy it turns their lungs to iron. Her streets sharpen their teeth and build calluses over their knuckles until the only thing they feel is the warm crimson in their wake.
Vander had hoped he'd never do this - be this. But jaws shatter under his fist faster than glasses fill with his whiskey. He's good at this. Always has been. The kids slip away - he knows that much.
Everything else is a bit of a blur. He glimpses Ekko, once, on the rooftops. The boy heads after the other four and Vander is thankful for that. Benzo didn't survive the first wave... he doesn't have much chance to reflect on that because there's another enforcer in his grip and a new scream in the air.
He buys the kids plenty of time. Too much time.
Enough time for all of Zaun to hear the news: the Hound's fighting back! Five enforcers are dead! Six! Ten! Enough time for Vi and Mylo to find their informants.
Silco isn't exactly a subtle name. He's well hidden, that's true, but a familiar blond limped his way over to one of the abandoned warehouses after Vi kicked the shit out of him. Word on the street is that he's in with someone named Silco. Doesn't mean much to the informant or to Vi.
It's enough. They slip into one of Zaun's many industrial districts just as Vander finally falls.
Piltover's attack dogs got him - they would eventually, he knew that much. A wild hound is fierce but numbers always win. Part of him's happy to die on familiar cobblestones. Better than the cool stone of prison - better than anything Piltover had in mind for him. This way, the kids would know what happened to him. They wouldn't do anything stupid.
Well... they'd probably still do some stupid things. He coughed out a laugh, blood hacking out of his lungs as it all began to fade. Good. They deserved to be a bit stupid. They were kids...
Just kids.
Hopefully, Silco remembers that...
Silco? Oh, Silco remembers. He'd been making a plan revolving around that. Kids are foolish. Kids are loyal. Children are painfully easy to manipulate and kill. Children are easy to make disappear.
Killing Vander and his children was quite literally on his upcoming schedule. It was going to be a glorious sort of revenge, making Vander watch it happen - helpless to stop it as he drowned in his own pacifism. It was going to be inhumane. The final nail in Silco's old coffin.
So pardon him for taking a moment to stare at the victims delivered to his doorstep. Half of him wants to laugh. The other half feels like he's been shoved back into that damn river.
The children only stare back, wide-eyed and curious. Scared too... haunted in some wonderfully poetic way.
"Can I help you?" Silco demands cooly after his disbelief has been satiated.
The pink one steps forward, naturally. She's Vander's little favorite, his poster child: basically a replica. Taking charge is probably laced in her veins.
She hands him a napkin.
"He told us to come here," she breathes, and it almost sounds like a prayer.
Silco cannot focus on anything but the napkin.
"Well... not here," the wily boy in the back disagrees slowly as he gives a scathing glance to a dead mouse in the corner. "He told us to find you."
Silco watches them carefully and then unfolds the napkin. If this is a trap it's ridiculous and definitely not Vander's idea. Perhaps these children are simply suicidal - or stupid.
He reads it.
Pauses. Reads it again.
He glances to that pink one again: Violet. Felicia's daughter. The other one is to her right, clinging to the elder's bruised knuckles. Powder... right?
Mylo. And Claggor.
Vander's children.
Vander's children!
He reads it one more time.
"It is kind of messy," Claggor's sheepish tone contradicts his appearance sharply. "He was in a rush -"
"I can read it," Silco snarls. He whirls around and plunges further into the bowels of the warehouse.
The children follow, blindly. Because they were told to. They follow the devil into his den because Vander told them to.
Why Silco let them, he'll never be able to explain. Never. Why he didn't finish was Vander started: destroy all remnants of their old life, including those damned children - he'll never say.
He can't. Because Vander sent him his children and a note. It changes nothing.
Except it changes everything.
#Arcane#AU#Fanfiction#I guess#idk I may write more#Vander#Silco#Vi#Powder#Mylo#Claggor#If the stars aligned I do believe Silco would've raised those kids#Ya know how Vi just has to call Cait “cupcake”#Yeah#That but all Vander has to do is tell Silco “I trust you” and Silco's whole worldview falls apart#Yeah yeah the man I was died in that river#But did he? Are you sure??#Also this is 100% an excuse to write the eventual family reunion with Warwick#Which would theoretically be hilarious#After all the angst of#what happened to you?#Paired with the yummy: “I survived but at what cost" parallel between the two dads#Followed by Silco's: “YOU FUCKER - YOU LEFT ME WITH YOUR KIDS WHEN WE WERE MORTAL ENEMIES! I COULD'VE KILLED THEM!”#The kids be like this is our Dad#The drug lord Silco#and this is our other Dad#The warcrime Warwick#We love them very much <3#We gotta Part 2 and a Part 3 now for the AU :D
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was it casual when i had a panic attack at the thought of you dying was it casual when you risked your entire carrier just to feed me lunch was it casual when you were willing to die protecting me even though you wouldn't accomplish any of the goals you devoted yourself to was it casual when i spent so many nights rolling around in deep thought about whether you think of me like i do about you was it casual when i wished for you upon a shooting star was it casual when i refused to let you continue your way down a path of self-destructive loneliness even though you wanted me to was it casual when you needed to kill me and only me to grow stronger and be entirely untethered from your past but you just couldn't was it casual when i preferred to bear your pain and hatred and die fighting you as opposed to giving up on you was it casual when i could trade blows with you (read your heart) even though your supposed wife couldn't was it casual when i was your one and only was it casual when the hands that we blew off of each other bore the evidence of our cosmic connection was it casual when you cried your first tears of relief and happiness after you lost to me was it casual when you kept in touch with me but not with your wife was it casual when we fought and laughed and became inseparable was it casual when i can't exist without you was it casual when i put all my goals on hold because how could i focus on them when i can't even save you was it casual when you were my main motivation for training to become infinitely stronger was it casual when i'd remain a fool my entire life if being smart meant that i had to give up on you was it casual when you know my heart i yours was it casual when
#which could mean nothing#nah the way i could've kept going for so long#this is ridiculous#they're actually insane#characters be doing all that and y'all still insist on calling them straight 😮💨#naruto was the og yearner. bro redefined what it means to be a pining teenager#you know it's bomb when the haters pull out “they see each other as brothers”#“they're married” actually the rainbow is so blatant it's blinding#ain't no way you watch five hundred episodes of these fools acting like this and your main takeaway is that they're platonic soulmates#i fear your gaydar is non-existent#“i had another dream about sasuke” girl ik what you are#only people who love naruto and sasuke more than i do are each other#they make me sick#im afraid i would not be doing all that for a friend or a person i consider a brother and yall wouldn't either#“naruto would do this for any of his friends” hm no.#how did that boy kisser megumi put it? something something personal feelings?#jokes aside i genuinely don't think naruto would go to such lengths for anyone other than sasuke at all#uzumaki naruto#uchiha sasuke#sns#sasunaru#narusasu#naruto#naruto shippunden#naruto uzumaki#sasuke uchiha#naruto and sasuke#naruto ramblings#it was never casual
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I'd thought I remembered, in the Knights of Requital planning, someone mentioning the gala being moved, because it gave the Nein an extra day to prep, and Dolan did specify that it had been unexpectedly pushed back a day, but doesn't suggest he knows why. (It's not clear to me based on the conversation when this change happened—it's possible Dolan has simply heard this update recently, but it also might've been a last minute change.) I was wondering because the timing of the Zauberspire attack coinciding with the gala seemed odd.
It is very narratively convenient, of course, and certainly the Kryn spies could've been using it for the same reason that the Knights of Requital were—important figures of the city were distracted and otherwise occupied, and Thuron does give an indication that Ulog was feeding them information as well, so he certainly could've suggested that timing to both.
But two things about the attack struck me: first, that the Zauberspire does not seem to be very far from where the gala is held, which makes it less of a distraction and more of a liability for covert military operations; and second, the Assembly reacts instantly. Moreover, Trent is already there, though he normally resides in Rexxentrum. He doesn't exactly seem the type to show up for annual holiday festivities, given he doesn't stand to gain much if anything from hobnobbing with a bunch of regional socialites, and Ludinus later suggests he is not exactly being dispatched to events as a diplomatic entity. Of course he can be in another city quite quickly, but this all happens so quickly that I find it unlikely that there would've been time to inform someone in another city prior to apprehending the infiltrators, given the immediacy with which the mages respond.
The point being, I think they were warned.
#hmmmm who could've possibly done such a thing wow i guess we'll never know#god i would KILL for the whole background on this attack in particular @ m9 animated gimmeeeee#hilariously if I'm right that would mean essek is doubly responsible for the war lmao#“i carry a lot of sins like you do”/“not anywhere like i do”/“don't be so sure”/“I'm pretty sure young man” YEAH LOL WELL HE WAS NOT LYING#I'm laughing. my fave is the worst (affectionate) and I'm laughing#let it never be said that i do not acknowledge his crimes#I am very aware of them and in fact am super happy to ascribe more to him#i am merely whooping and cheering the whole time. because it's fun#love fictional mess in sociopolitics hate it irl#cr meta#megs rewatches c2
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BROCEDES! ROOMMATE AU + UNEXPECTED VIRGIN!
‘Take a shot if your body count is more than 5!’
Most of the crowd drinks, even those with obviously shifty eyes and guilty demeanours. Lewis drinks.
He was coursemates with Adrian the previous semester and had to hear his bitching and moaning about the bitches he gets – the lack thereof, spots him drinking too. Nico’s standing at the end of the couch, expensive loafers careful to step around the sticky spilled beer.
He nurses his red solo cup, untouched. Lewis frowns.
‘Take a shot if your body count is double digits!’
Fewer people drink this time. The crowd goes ‘ooh’ at the ones who do. Technically, Lewis’ is 7 – 8 if you count the blowjob and her getting her period at the last second, opting out. But college athletes have a reputation to maintain, so Lewis finishes off his cup.
This time, Nico is watching him. Smiles when their eyes meet and does a mock salute, lips still not grazing his drink.
What the fuck? What could it be? It bothers Lewis that Nico’s not being honest. He's seen Nico half-lidded hanging off some guy’s arm at a party or cuddled into some girl to know better. Although, since Nico has access to all the population instead of 50%, it would make sense if his count is twice as high.
A pretty girl in a low cut top and blonde highlights taps Lewis on the arm to dance with her, and all thoughts of his roommate and how many people he fucks are forgotten.
A few hours later, the party has died down. Cold pizza and the music is less in-your-face, more indie. A small group gather on the floor playing the laziest truth or dare with a half empty bottle of Bacardi. The guy beside Nico is in an obnoxious leather jacket and tight pants, and his hand rests on Nico’s thigh.
It falls on Lewis.
“So… Lew-iss,” Natalie? maybe asks, voice slurring a little. “Do you remember when you first met Nico?”
Nico raises an interested eyebrow. Of course he remembers. However, Lewis is aware they asked the question because people think him and Nico are secretly hooking up because they live together, and since Nico’s seen with everyone. His teammate Felipe and his girlfriend are within earshot.
“Nah, man. I don't remember shit like that. I remember when I like, lost my virginity.” Lewis offers as bait.
Nico frowns, it's cute on him. Brows wrinkled up.
Naomi(!) bites. “Tell us about how you lost your virginity.”
“That's two questions.” Lewis leans back, flashing his most charming gap-toothed smile. Everyone's too drunk to keep track of whose turn it is.
Nico disappears off with Mr. Skinny Jeans.
It's a little while later when Lewis has smoked a spliff to clear his head, rejecting the blonde highlights girl’s offer back to her dorms which is on the other side of campus, when Nico returns, hair mussed and shirt buttoned more than it was when he left.
“Home?” He asks. Lewis follows.
Nico’s a pretty chill roommate. He grew up with a silver spoon and an only child, so he has no concept of sharing. Instead, when he orders Thai, he makes sure to order for two so that Lewis doesn't try to eat any of his dumplings. Lewis gets to have the flat to himself a lot since Nico disappears for the night, returns at early hours of the night with glitter on his cheek or bite marks on his neck and a cheeky smile before collapsing on the couch. Lewis can't complain, it makes bringing girls over easier. And when Nico is studying, he keeps to himself. Lewis will know, because there will be an extra coffee for him. In turn, Lewis gets rids of the bugs in the flat – the first time Nico seeing a cockroach asking if they should call pest control or sue their landlord for unhygienic living conditions.
“Why didn't you drink? At the body count question?” Lewis asks, breaking the amiable silence of their walk home, and the lack of filter signalling he was drunker than he thought.
Nico hums thoughtfully. “Cause that would be a lie?”
Lewis tries to make sense of that, doing math in his head. “No…? It wasn't about the exact number, just if it's more than.”
“Yeah,” Nico smiles, unlocking the door and stepping side. “That would be a lie.”
Lewis rolls his eyes. Nico and his riddles and his games. “It would only be a lie if you're a virgin. Which you're not.” He snorts at the thought.
Nico’s eyes flash dangerously. “Yeah?” Nico turns around, effectively trapping Lewis between the door. “You think about who gets in my pants a lot, Hamilton?”
Lewis feels a flush rise in his neck. Thank god for melanin, if he were Nico he'd have two giant red spots on his cheek right now.
“I don't care who you sleep with. Or don't sleep with.” Lewis tries to go for gruff, chill, but it doesn't quite land. He gets out of Nico’s cornering, going to the couch. “It's just weird you’d lie considering Jenson–”
“Oh if Jenson said it, it must be true.” Nico’s sarcasm is shrill and annoyed, betraying how drunk he is.
It does make Lewis pause. Jenson has a habit of embellishing stories of his conquests. The fated twins threesome never happened, he had separately hooked up with twins. Lewis remembers Jenson bragging in the locker room how he rocked Britney’s world and Lewis had worn his his shin guards with a little more force than necessary.
“Rock my world?” Nico rolls his eyes, leaning against the wall. “Hardly. We made out for forty minutes until he came in his pants.”
TMI because now Lewis is inundated of images of Nico, mouth swollen and bodies entangled while fully clothed.
“So you're actually a virgin? What about all those people?” Lewis is still trying to wrap his head around it. Nico is the most sexual person he knows. He eats yoghurt off the spoon distractingly, and has no shame walking around the apartment naked. Very sexual liberation chic, and Lewis had to draw up boxers boundaries.
Nico wrinkles his nose. “So you get with the easiest lay on campus and you're the only person he won't fuck. Do you want to admit something's weird and wrong with you, or do you just go about inferring you had sex? It's not like I'm going to correct them.” He must see something on Lewis’ face because he interjects, defensively offensive, “Don't ask why it's better to have a reputation. I know your tells. You drank twice.”
Lewis chooses his words carefully, gentle like he's not trying to spook a wild cat. “I'm not judging. I'm just surprised. Nobody figured it out?”
Nico softens at the tone. He sinks on the couch beside Lewis. “Honestly, you're the first person to notice.”
Lewis finds that sad. “Hey, we don't need to talk about this if it's a sensitive topic. I'm sorry I –”
“Jeez, Lewis. I don't have trauma, I'm just frigid. A pricktease. Nothing bad ever happens to a Rosberg.” Nico works on the complicated laces of his boots. He hates being pitied.
Lewis leans over. “It's really not all that cracked up to be. The first time, at least. Cause you're bad at it and you don't know how to pace yourself. Lots of people wait until they're ready. My first time, it was this girl I was seeing after GCSEs. We couldn't find a place so we got in my dad’s old Subaru. Lasted like 30 seconds. Wiped the whole place down but I was convinced he would know somehow. Come Sunday, I went and told him. He hadn’t the slightest clue. So that was an awkward drive to church.”
Nico gawks him, crumpling into himself laughing. Lewis regrets being a vulnerable and oversharer of a drunk. Nico’s gelled hair has come undone from hours of partying and falls over his eyes. Lewis is never going to open up to anyone ever again.
“On God's day, Lewis?! And you think I should save myself until marriage? Find myself a nice, righteous wife?”
“Someone you trust. Someone you're into.” The room spins a little. Nico Rosberg is a virgin.
“Someone who’d remember when we first met?” Nico challenges. "That's not very nice, is it? I can't believe you forgot--"
“You were checking out an encyclopaedia on space at the library. I wanted the Senna autobiography. We were 12.”
Nico’s eyes go wide. Lewis holds his gaze.
#I love roommate aus :3 what if the object of ur desire was 1 room away and yet the distance is greater than oceans#I hope you catch all the little references. and please!!!! if you enjoy it let me know I'll lore dump#brocedes#f1 rpf#my fics#I love friendship tinged with desire. this could've gone into sex right after virgin reveal but I wanted them to be friends talking first#roommates au
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Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.
I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.
I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.
Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.
Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"
But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.
Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.
Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?
Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?
"What happened...to us?"
#I just think the tragedy of falling out of love for the person who represents who they Used to be is so...so painful#Kacchan isn't even here yet and it's already so complicated.#also. Izch healing together after all this would also be really nice#if u like them ending up together thats also perfectly fine too. im just a bkdk and tgck truther myself. thats kinda my whole thing#but izch forming a deep bond from their experiences and saving eachother#and maybe later on trying to date too...oh boy#and them being able to just...be more casual again. talk abt their lives and dreams together too just so they know they have each other#oh itd be so healing and beautiful#im so glad izuku talked to ochako on that cliff man oh man...#izuocha the underrated tragic love that they could've been if ppl werent so close minded abt them#only the real izch fans understand just how much these two actually mean to each other. god bless yall I swear even if I dont ship ship it#thank u to that person who wrote abt them being characters than run in parallel#that narrative structure for them is permanently in my brain. I love these two so much its no joke#my Extra hot take is that izch wouldve been treated better by the fandom if it was gay.#but we'd still agree on bkdk as the endgame after all that happened. maybe. idk this is a hypothetical.#if you switch ock and kats genders...this wouldve been a very different story and fandom. insane food for thought with this one.#ok thats my yap for the night oh god i have so many feelings about them...#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#izuocha#actually confidently putting this tag now. sorry for the angst you guys...and maybe being seen as a traitor#im a strong girl I could take on potential haters hahaha...#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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I'm stealing this from my lit teacher but he posed that something certain characters in arcane s2 missed were 'Zuko Alone' moments. Moments where characters took an extended amount of time to introspect, face the consequences of their actions, and connect with the wider world. This, to me, is why Caitlyn's arc wasn't as effective as it could've been. After a switch-up, after a big 180 like hers, it is simply necessary to track the progression of her arc. It's easy to say "In hating you, I've hated myself" and "no amount of good deeds can undo our crimes" but when you don't see her face the Zaunites or acknowledge the class-privileges she exploited, it all rings a little hollow. Arcane usually does a good job of tying the personal with the political and I think that's hidden in Cait's arc. She works as a character when you're understanding her actions in relation to her love for Vi and forgiveness of Jinx. She doesn't if you think of it on a wider socio-political scale. It's just a little odd when the show is such an arbiter of 'show don't tell'. That line has to do alot of heavy lifting. Alas, what time restraints does to an arc.
#i say this with so much love btw cait is very precious to me#i think her arc still works to some degree but like i said - could've been a lot more effective esp in terms of political messaging#i also hate the tone of the discourse around her rn. where did all the nuance go. get behind me and also cait go stand in the corner.#also before anyone says anything i know that she gives up her council seat to sevika. we should've gotten a conversation.#i think we might've if they didn't have to cut the episode for time#it's not a matter of 'OMG ARCANE HAS TO SPELL EVERYTHING OUT FOR YOU'#you don't hinge a key character moment on an implication#it's the fact that it would fix the 'cait doesn't engage with the consequences of her actions' issue AND prove important for Sevika's arc#by solidifying the fact that she's now in Vander's position working alongside Caitlyn (the spiritual successor of Grayson)#the burden would also rest on Caitlyn to put in the work#which is so much less insidious than Sevika's lone appearance at the council#anyway this is all canon to me personally#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#caitlyn kiramman#jp musings
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gelphie are so silver springs coded im SICK
#“time cast a spell on you buy you won't forget me i know i could've loved you but you would not let me” WHAT THE FUCKKKK#“was i just a fool? you'll never get away from the sound of the woman who loved you” what if we all just killed ourselves#gelphie#wicked#wicked 2024#glinda upland#elphaba thropp#glinda x elphaba
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need a fat girl sitting on my face and eating sushi off my tummy/tits
#hmmm i wonder what could've inspired this#hiiiii astrid i love you and i know ur gonna see this eventually >:3#also obviously inspired by the mousegirlheart post i was spam reblogging lol
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i'm going to scream i got accused of being a transmisogynist by someone on twitter because of this specific part of my t4t steddie art
#ramble#the thing is 99.9% of people thought it was VERY funny#i've had 1 person genuinely have a problem with it and it was because i kept eddie transmasc#basically they were upset because i didn't make them both transfemme bc i just. didn't want to#twitter hasn't learned that not everything is for you and if you don't like something you don't have to interact with it#and just because you don't like something that doesn't mean it's Bad#and also sometimes queer things aren't made to be understood by everyone#it was specifically because they thought it made them into 'just another straight couple'#as if that isn't a MASSIVE erasure of trans people's queerness#trans people in m/f relationships doesn't make them any less queer or somehow inferior to gay relationships#it boiled down to 'but you could've made them lesbians :((' YEAH BUT I DIDN'T#idk it was just absolutely infuriating trying to defend myself without saying 'idk what the fuck you want from me at this point'#anyway transfemme stevie is very big on twt but i didn't know whether to post it here or not#but i might if people want to see it because i love it a lot#twitter would die if they saw the olden days when we called them genderbends and there wasn't any trans content at all
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mmmm musical cultivator shen yuan again. Feng Xuanlu, the Wind Song. He has this well-loved wooden pipe he inherited from is adoptive father that he uses on occasion. When the traveling day gets slow and he doesn't feel like singing, when he's stressed, when night falls and he's sitting around a fire with his troupe and they've all had a little bit to drink.
His hair is long and black, always tied up into a ponytail or a braid of some sort. When he's in camp he loosens it up until its splayed messily over his shoulder. He has crows feet around his eyes that scrunch up when he smiles. His eyes are bamboo green and his hands are rough and callused from years of plucking strings and work. He has scars on his back that he won't explain the origins of.
His voice is low and warm like a fire, it gets raspy in the mornings or when he's been humming or singing for too long. He speaks like there's sunshine dripping off his tongue. He speaks soft, he speaks and his voice takes up the entire room. He's spent over a decade hearing his praises getting sung and he still gets shy over it sometimes.
Whenever he goes into town he has to have at least three other musicians with him at all times -- not his decision of course, but the unanimous choice of his companions. Shen Yuan gathers admirers everywhere he goes, and his companions have long since learned that their dear friend and leader is completely unaware of it. So they have to beat off these suitors with sticks.
#svsss#shen yuan#svsss au#scum villain#mxtx svsss#musical cultivator shen yuan#ive been thinking about a shen yuan who smokes for DAYS. do i think Shizun SY would smoke? mmmm depends on if he thinks the OG would#and he'd probably stop as a villain reformation thing. but im saying this SY smokes. he's 40 (60) years old and an immortal cultivator.#let him have this! its not like he does it OFTEN either. plus i want to kill binghe via horniness gripping.#this is mostly me just playing with character design. bc i love it <3#im waxing poetic about Shen Yuan nobody mind me. i want to talk about how long his hair is and when he speaks you can hear windchimes#and how he sings songs from his old world but wrapped in a thin paper of PIDW context. he lounges and stays up late to listen to his#companions sing drunken songs and tell stories. he complains to them about stories and inconveniences. he's just out here living his life#he complains about how he was mistaken for sqq AGAIN. 'maybe i dont look like shen qingiqu! maybe its shen qingqiu that looks like ME!'#'laoshi you've said this before hahaha' 'AND I WILL SAY IT AGAIN' 'are you sure you dont wanna just take a blood test?' 'yes'#'how could we be related? it could just be a coincidence! the gods playing a joke.' he doesnt want to be related to the scum villain#that paints a target on his back! its read as SY being in denial bc he doesnt wanna think about how he could've abandoned or been abandoned#by family. they have no way of knowing if they're related and whose older.#lmao someone mistakes SQQ for the Feng Xuanlu once. he's NOT happy.
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do you guys ever think about Marco being the only good thing Grant ever let himself have . the only good thing he ever consciously chose to have . do you guys ever think about that .
#just blahs#help im thinking about them too much#i need to draw them so bad#im gonna go draw them#oh my god#like . guys . he didn't even chose lincoln .#but he chose marco .#he chose to love marco . and he chose to let himself be loved by marco .#he could have just . not let himself have that . he could've chosen to ignore marco and not done anything and stayed alone#like he thinks he deserves to be .#oh my god .#do you guys ever think about that r.#that no matter how much he really truly hates himself he allows himself to have marco .#to have someone in his life who he knows *chose* to love him .#god .#i can't think about them too hard or else i get really obsessed w them oh my god#and they don't even have a tag i can look through :(#marco li wilson#grant li wilson#dndads
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