#I just want my ot3 back okay
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“Parker,” Eliot hisses at the ceiling vent, “what the fuck?" Aw, shit. “Aw, shit.” Hardison grimaces, rubbing his head. In the…excitement of the night, he completely forgot about Parker. “Parker, why are you in the ceiling?” There's a long pause. “I don't understand the question,” Parker says.
eliot/hardison/parker rights
#eliot spencer#alec hardison#parker leverage#do they have a ship name#leverage#leverage fic#leverage ot3#fic#my fic#stuff#quick lil thing bc im obsessed with the dynamics here#i will have to do a more in depth study one day hopefully#picture the marquee: aro eliot x ace parker x pan hardison ot3 qpr and they're all holding hands and it's great#eliot and parker boost cars and do yoga and fuckin rescue orphans together#they WOULD do that shit#okay im done back to actually WATCHING leverage now xoxo#this version of events is so delightful to me that i don't want to return to actual canon#i just want to live in this fantasy world ive created where this ot3 is extremely canon and real
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Hello, i have noticed the lack of love for my girls, Charlie and Vaggie, could you do a Charlie x Reader x Vaggie? OT3?
Love Triangle? No, Love Circle.
Chaggie x GN!Reader
A/N: Before anyone jumps down my esophagus to yell at me about the character’s sexuality. I know Vaggie’s canonically a lesbian and Charlie is bisexual, I know. Don’t send hate or anything cause I will delete that shit, I don’t have time for it. Alright with that out of the way. LET'S JUMP IN!! I also made headcanons- If you want a fic I will definitely write one, I just kinda dumped my brain on this.
TW: A little nsfw at the end I’m sorry (not really I need more)
-🎀 First off let me say, these girls love you in every way imaginable but they show it in different ways. Charlie shows it by hugs and kisses between work to constantly profess her love to you and Vaggie so all of hell could listen. Vaggie shows her love in more simple acts like getting you food or dragging you away from work if she sees you working too hard.
-👑 Both women are very very protective of you as well, now that’s not say they won’t go overboard if you get caught in the line of fire from the random villain of the day. Both have different ways of trying to get you out of trouble but will immediately come to your defense if they dare try to lay a hand on you. Charlie tries to get the situation to settle down while Vaggie locates every exit there to get you out as fast as she can if it goes south.
-🎀 Don’t get me started on if you surprise them both with a date, day off or just a simple random kiss. Both of them get extremely flustered when this happens, it’s amazing to see it happen. Don’t worry though both ladies will get you back in some fashion just keep an eye out.
Going off of the kiss idea? You gotta know when to strike to really catch one or both off guard. Charlie is by far the easiest to catch off guard, she’s just so busy and her mind is everywhere all at once it gets too much sometimes so you walking up to her and bringing her into a gentle but sweet kiss gets all the stress out. Of course she’s gonna let out a soft squeak and get all blushy but she almost always melts into the kiss immediately. This is just a headcanon of mine but she definitely stims by tapping her hooves on the ground to show how happy or excited she is. (GIVE ME MORE GOAT LIKE CHARLIE CONTENT PLEASE)
Vaggie is somewhat harder to surprise, she’s trained to immediately notice when someone is trying to sneak up on her or when something is out of place. She can’t help it and sometimes she wishes she didn’t really have to be this extra vigilant, but to really surprise her and get her flustered. Don’t be sneaky at all cause once again she will immediately and unapologetically point it out. So your best bet? Just walk up to her and kiss her cheek or on her lips. She won’t see it coming at all, she’ll get all red in the face and flustered beyond belief that her wings might just pop out.
-👑 Now if you work at the hotel with them Charlie will most likely try to help lighten your workload (please tell her your okay, baby stresses enough as is). Vaggie will help in some way or form whilst making sure Charlie isn’t overworking herself. Oh you need more paper? Don’t worry she’s running to get more. Something or someone is getting on your nerves? She’s pulling you away to do something else or she’s scaring the other person away.
-🎀 If you don’t work at the hotel and you keep coming back stressed as ever? Don’t worry your pretty little head, they will pamper you all night and the next morning? Your boss is suddenly giving you a pay raise AND the next four weeks off.
-👑 If you are an early bird that tends to wake up at or a little after the crack of dawn? Good luck getting out of bed. Charlie is a cuddler and will not let you out so easily, Vaggie in my mind is a light sleeper so she wakes up to give you a gentle kiss before immediately falling back asleep head on Charlie’s chest. Double the points if you cook them breakfast when they wake up, you won’t escape their barrage of kisses.
-🎀 They both will allow you to steal some of their clothes and will steal your clothes in return. It’s a win-win situation.
Charlie is canonically tall, like 6 foot something now- if you're taller than her she is wearing any hoodies or sweatpants of yours there is no discussion here. It will happen. But if you are shorter than her which is most likely she will happily let you and Vaggie steal her sweatshirts/hoodie/jackets.
Vaggie on the other hand is short like 5’5 (me too girl wtf-) or 5’7 so if you're taller than her? She’s stealing your clothes too but she’s much sneakier than Charlie. But if you're shorter or the same height as her she’ll allow you to steal her clothes as well but please don’t keep them for a week straight. She has a routine of doing all three of your guys' laundry and she doesn’t want to miss cleaning certain clothes you and Charlie steal.
-👑omg let me tell you- these girls love to pamper the shit out of you but if you return it? They will fall more in love with you. Massaging Vaggie’s back after a rough day or maybe helping her preen her wings. Washing Charlie’s hair or maybe rubbing where her horns are at as she lays between your legs and rants about whatever had her upset that day or if we are going down the path where Charlie has more goat like features (pls someone- I want to talk about this) just helping trimming her hooves. Girl needs to be extra pampered with her lovers after the shit she has to put up with day to day.
A little nsfw that’s popping in my mind- MINORS GO AWAY
-🎀OH BOY- Wearing something that fits your curves just right or something that’s a little showy gets both of them flustered and ready to drag you somewhere else. Charlie (bless her soul) tries to respectfully look away but you can catch how her gaze keeps drifting back to you and Vaggie? She’s looking respectfully and she’s not hiding it either.
-👑 Tease them all day long and they will not allow you to walk in the morning or the next few days. So…use caution when teasing The Princess of Hell and an ex-exorcist. They love you but they won’t go easy on you.
-🎀 Overall 20/10 relationship, may have some rough patches but they love you and will 100% talk everything out.
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel imagine#gn reader#charlie morningstar#hazbin charlie#vaggie#hazbin vaggie#charlie x vaggie#charlie x reader#vaggie x charlie#vaggie x reader#chaggie#chaggie x reader
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Interlude: Hyung Line
Or
The one where the three oldest members of the group find themselves in deep shit
Summary: Namjoon returns to see everyone in a crisis. Seokjin has a conversation with his girlfriend, while Hoseok wonders if he's going to lose his best friend. Meanwhile, Yoongi ruminates on an impulsive decision.
Pairing: OT3 x OC (different OCs)
Genre: Humour, fluff, angst
Word count: 11.2 K
Rating: 18+
Warnings: language
A/N: It's been forever since I posted and I bring you... *an aftermath fic*!! Takes place the morning after A Stormy Night.
Tagging: @bbl32 @quarter-life-crisis2 @dreaming-with-happiness @faearchives @margopinkerton @purpleseoul7 @confessionsofamarshlily @jiminjhang @xjoonchildx @tarahardcore @infinitehobi @handfullofcandids @whoisbts @jihopesjoint @kflixnet (drop a message if you want to be added)
Listen to: "dope lovers" by dpr ian
seokjin masterlist | yoongi masterlist | hoseok masterlist | main masterlist
When Hoseok wakes up the next morning, it’s to slivers of sunlight through a soft mesh sort of thing on his face. He blinks and shifts slightly; it’s Chaeyoung’s hair, where his face was buried, and he squints towards the window where an apologetic looking sun has reared its head in the sky after a night of torrential rain.
He relaxes slightly; next to him, Chaeyoung hasn’t moved, her shoulders rising and falling peacefully with every breath she takes. His phone buzzes and he turns to reach for it.
Taehyung [08:45] Anyone need a ride to HQ? I’m leaving in a bit Although no one apart from Jungkookie seems to be in the dorm right now
Namjoon [08:48] I’ll reach on my own. I just got off a flight so I came to my apartment to take a shower.
Seokjin [09:00] I’ll reach on my own too.
Taehyung [09:01] Okay. Where were you last night?
Seokjin [09:01] Never you mind. I have my car.
Yoongi [09:02] Me too.
Hoseok stares at the screen, slowly licking his lips.
Hoseok [09:03] Me too.
Taehyung [09:04] This is not suspicious at all.
Jimin [09:04] I’m at my place with Sooah :D:D:D I’ll be there soon - but everybody don’t forget to be at the restaurant for her birthday lunch! No latecomers!
Taehyung [09:05] I take it your night turned out well after all?
Jimin [09:05] Yessss it did, god bless. I have the best girlfriend in the world - but I’ll tell you about it later. I mean it though - don’t be late for the lunch. Hobi hyung - you can bring Chaeyoung.
Hoseok stomach jolts.
Hoseok [09:06] That’s super random. She’s totally capable of coming on her own, you know? She’s not a kid anymore and I’m not responsible for her anyway.
Jimin [09:08] Errrr I meant because the roads are still a bit flooded so she may not want to walk to the bus stop. But I guess she can come on her own too.
Jungkook [09:09] I can pick her up on my way to the restaurant if you want, hyung.
Taehyung [09:09] You’re alive??? I knocked on your door at least twice last night but I heard nothing. I thought you died in there or something.
Jungkook [09:10] Oh yeah. I was really tired.
Taehyung [09:10] Lol, I’m sure.
Jungkook [09:10] @Namjoon How was your trip hyung?
Namjoon [09:11] Amazing Didn’t want to come back tbh
Jimin [09:11] That feels great to hear But I have a girlfriend now so I get it
Jungkook [09:12] Gross
Jimin [09:12] Don’t be bitter just because you’re single
Yoongi [09:13] Yeah go get laid instead
Taehyung [09:13] I still don’t know where half of you are though. How was everyone out last night despite that horrendous storm?
Namjoon [09:14] Yoongi hyung corrupting the children since 2013
Yoongi [09:14] Me? I think Hobi is doing enough of that for all of us
Hoseok [19:15] What! Of course not. Why even would you say that? What are you talking about
Yoongi [09:16] Sorry, I meant Seokjin
Seokjin [09:16] Errrrrrrr
Taehyung [09:16] I mean, is it me? Am I the lame one for having stayed home last night?
Yoongi [09:17] You were on your way to HQ last night, weren’t you?
Taehyung [09:17] No?
Yoongi [09:17] Not you
Namjoon [09:18] Did I leave my charger at the dorm?
Taehyung [09:18] No idea Speaking of which, you owe me a lock for my door
Namjoon [09:19] Excuse me?
Jungkook [09:19] Taehyung
Yoongi [09:20] Yeah and you need to return my aux cable. It’s still in your car. I couldn’t charge my phone last night and had to fight Miso to borrow hers
Hoseok [09:20] Wait you were with Miso last night?
Seokjin [09:21] @Namjoon I called you to check about the company HQ sleeping quarters too but you didn’t answer
Jimin [09:21] Oh yeah, Namjoon hyung - you weren’t here to give me a pep talk when my night for Sooah was going up in flames either. I had to call Taehyungie and Jungkook instead and they were no help at all!
Jungkook [09:22] Hey!
Taehyung [09:22] Hey!
Namjoon [09:22] One ridiculous problem at a time, please!
Hoseok frowns, already losing interest. He navigates away from the chat and scrolls through his messages, answering some and ignoring others, his eyes now somewhat getting used to the light of the screen. Just as he’s about to close the app, another message pops up.
Chanyeol [09:15] Up?
Hoseok [09:15] Just about
Chanyeol [09:16] Kk. Listen, are you going home anytime soon?
Hoseok [09:17] To Gwangju? Not part of the plan right now, no. Maybe Christmas? Why?
Chanyeol [09:17] We were planning when to go next. Hayoung’s parents are probably travelling end of the year so we’re trying to plan a trip when everyone we want to meet will be there at the same time.
Hoseok [09:18] And I’m part of that list? Chan, you honour me
Chanyeol [09:18] You’d think you wouldn’t be after 20 years of being friends but hey
Hoseok [09:18] You know Seoul is like a train ride away right? Why do you want to wait to hang out in Gwangju?
Chanyeol [09:19] Home and stuff
Hoseok [09:19] Hella senti, I have to say
Chanyeol [09:19] There’s the added bonus of Hayoung and I having to stay with our respective parents when we go home though
Hoseok [09:20] That’s what I’m saying! Come to Seoul
Chanyeol [09:21] I will… I just have to do a Gwangju trip soon. Hopefully when you’re there too
Hoseok [09:21] Why?
Chanyeol [09:22] Okay don’t say a word to ANYONE But I kinda want to ask Hayoung to move in
Chanyeol [09:23] Hoseok?
Chanyeol [09:24] Dude you’re freaking me out. Is that a terrible idea?
Hoseok [09:25] Nope Just recovering from MY MIND BEING BLOWN My boy’s growing up!!!
Chanyeol [09:25] Jesus You scared the shit out of me for a couple minutes there
Hoseok [09:26] I’m gonna dance my ass off at your wedding
Chanyeol [09:26] Whoaaa. Slow down there pop star
Chanyeol [09:27] Anyway, that’s why I want to go back. I want to do this thing where she’s at her parents’ house and I’m at mine and then I bring up all these rules that we used to have at home when we were kids and then just casually wonder what it would be like if we could make our own rules - in our own home.
Hoseok [09:28] Adorable Just adorable Still waiting for how my Gwangju plans fit into this though
Chanyeol [09:29] Are you kidding? I need you there for moral support!
Hoseok [09:29] So, like… hiding outside in the bushes while you’re talking to Hayoung?
Chanyeol [09:30] No, that would be creepy. But this might be the second most important question I ever ask in my life so I need you there. In town. In the vicinity. So I can plan and maybe make some kind of a grand gesture? Unless it’s stupid
Hoseok [09:30] No! Of course I’ll be there. Just let me know when
Chanyeol [09:31] I will. In any case, it doesn’t look like we’ll be able to go back until at least January so that gives me some time to prep.
Chanyeol [09:32] Thanks though. You’re a good friend. The best actually.
Hoseok stares at the screen, the smile on his face fading. The faint flowery perfume and the scent of skin on skin suddenly seems stronger. Something shifts next to him and he turns on his back with dread, faced with the sleeping form of his best friend’s half-naked younger sister.
—
“Everything okay?”
Seokjin looks up, instinctively locking his phone as Nari walks into the living room, stopping just shy of the edge of the carpet.
“Yeah. Just… the usual.” He shrugs, placing his phone next to him. He bites his lip, suddenly at a loss for words. “Did you sleep okay?”
“Mhm.” She nods, running her fingers through the top of her hair and letting it fall down one shoulder. “You? Was the sofa comfortable?”
“Oh. Yeah, totally.” He tries to suppress the urge to stretch his back. “How about you? Oh -“ He clears his throat when she frowns slightly. “Right. We just did you.”
Nari nods again, this time slower. “Listen, Seokjin, about last night -“
“Nari, about what happened -“
They pause at the same time and Seokjin feels his ears turn red, the same time as she chuckles awkwardly and looks away.
“You go,” offers Seokjin, regretting it almost immediately.
“No, no, please, you can go first.”
“No, I insist -“
Nari stares for a few seconds, looking hesitant. “I just wanted to say… don’t worry about it. We can just forget it.”
Seokjin processes this, his pulse slightly uneven. “Okay,” he says lightly. “Thanks for, uh… letting me sleep over.”
“I think I kind of forced you,” she reminds him. “I couldn’t quite have your hypothermia on my hands. They’d take away my medical license if I let you go back out in that rain. Oh, and take your time returning the clothes,” she adds suddenly. “Although I think that sweatshirt is yours, if I’m not mistaken.”
“Um -“ He looks down at the faded blue sweatshirt and grey joggers she’d lent him last night. “Oh, yeah. I stopped looking for this, like, three years ago. I thought I left it in some hotel in America.”
“Well, it would’ve been on eBay selling for a million dollars if that were the case,” she says teasingly.
Seokjin cracks a smile. Unlike last night when, for a glorious portion of an hour, things had felt almost normal, he feels more uncomfortable than ever. Part of him feels like screaming into a pillow, for it’s occurring to him now what a terrible position he’s put himself and Nari in, not to mention Seulgi, stranded in Big Hit.
“Oh.” The word escapes his lips before he realises. He scrambles off the sofa, running a hand through his messy hair. “I have to go… I need to pick up -“ He looks up at Nari.
“Yeah, no. That’s fine.” She nods. “I hope you don’t feel weird about last night, though.”
“I don’t.” He pauses. “I don’t feel weird about it,” he says clearly, but this isn’t the time to have this discussion. Not while his girlfriend is elsewhere, not until he’s done the right thing by her.
Nari looks like she’s about to say something but shakes her head at the last moment. “That’s good. I guess I’ll see you around?”
Seokjin observes her, bare face and slightly puffy eyes. She's biting her lip - he’d kissed those lips last night, he remembers and waits for his face to get hot again.
But it doesn’t. He nods. “Yeah. See you around, Nari.” He trudges out, squinting slightly at the sun and needing a coffee so, so badly.
“Seokjin.” She’s standing at the door when he turns and her eyes twinkle slightly in a way that makes his stomach leap hopefully. “Thanks for coming last night, though.”
It takes him a moment. “Of course. Happy half-birthday, Nari.”
The roads are unforgiving. Despite a lot of the water having been drained, the streets are still flowing with ankle deep water, leaves and debris strewn around everywhere, and entire roads blocked for repairs.
Seokjin reaches Big Hit almost thirty minutes later than he’d intended. Just as he’s about to drive into the basement parking, he spots Seulgi walking out of the front doors, one hand on the strap of her bag and the other holding her phone.
He immediately pulls into the front of the building and skids to a stop, accidentally splashing water from a puddle on her ankles.
“What the -“
“Sorry!” he exclaims apologetically, turning off the car and stepping out.
“Seokjin?” Her shoulders relax when she notices him - but she doesn’t smile. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, the roads are crap. Figured you might need a ride home?” he ventures.
“Oh.” She seems hesitant. Even after spending a whole night at the company sleeping quarters, she looks like she’s stepped out a shower and spent thirty minutes getting ready; there isn’t a hair out of place or a single crease in her clothing. Dressed in an ancient sweatshirt - and what he suddenly remembers with a shock are Nari’s joggers - he feels like a complete slob.
“Unless… you don’t want one.”
Seulgi stares at him. For a second, he thinks she might throw her phone at his face. But a moment later she shrugs.
“That would be nice. Thank you.”
It’s formal and slightly awkward, but Seokjin takes it as a good sign when she opens the passenger door and gets in. He drives mostly in silence; he isn’t sure what to say to her and figures he at least owes her a ride to her doorstep before they have this discussion.
This route is shorter, fortunately, and fifteen minutes later when he pulls up in front of her building, he takes a deep breath. Before he can get a word out, though, she speaks.
“We’re done, Seokjin.”
His heart jolts harder than he expected it would. “What?”
She continues looking out of the windshield, but her voice is calm yet steely. “I spent more time yesterday worrying about our relationship than on my presentation. And that’s not me. Neither is getting in the middle of a situation as messy as yours and Nari’s, but -“ She scoffs without humour.
Seokjin isn’t sure what hurts more: the fact that he wasn’t expecting this right now, or the fact that he can’t help but agree with her.
“Seulgi… I know I haven’t been a good partner lately. I know that and you deserve -“
“Don’t tell me what I deserve. Please,” she says, still calm, but this time he thinks he can hear her voice tremble slightly. “I think you tried. Trying to call me the last few weeks, checking up on me last night, picking me up right now… you’ve been raised to be a decent guy.” She shakes her head and looks out her window. “But it really loses its charm when there’s another woman in the picture.”
Shame trickles down Seokjin’s spine but he forces himself to listen to her and absorb every single word. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what I felt for Nari - and I still don’t, but I never meant to -“
“Really? Is that why you’re wearing a pair of pants with her name printed on them?”
His heart stops.
“What?”
Seulgi scoffs again, but it’s followed by the smallest of sniffs. “God, I was such an idiot.”
Seokjin looks down at the joggers, frowning deeply and scanning his leg to see what Seulgi might have until he spots it: right by the edge of the pocket, in faded Hangul… Choi Nari.
“No. No, no, this - no. No.” Seokjin shakes his head vigorously, for she's got it all wrong. But for some reason, his mouth seems incapable of saying anything other than no, no, no.
“Spare me. You're literally in her pants,” she says icily. “God - I'm that girl. The one who started dating a guy with a girl best friend that stopped being just a friend somewhere along the way. Talk about a B-grade k-drama.” She begins gathering her bag and unstrapping her seatbelt.
“Seulgi,” he says hurriedly, “I did not - I swear to you, it's nothing like you're imagining.”
She turns to him and tilts her head, but her eyes are shuttered - apart from being wet. “Really? You weren't with her last night?”
“No! I mean, I was at her house but I wasn't with -”
“Goodbye, Seokjin,” she interrupts him, opening the car door and climbing out. “Thanks for the ride,” she mutters, just before slamming the door shut and walking away.
Seokjin watches her leave in shock. His heart is beating uncomfortably and he feels sick in his stomach, for as much of a right Seulgi had to do this and as much as he even expected her to, hurting her this way was not something he had ever intended.
He isn’t sure how long he sits out there; it isn’t until his phone rings that he’s jerked out of his trance.
“Hello?” He clears his throat and presses his fingers into his eyes, feeling them get wet as he lowers them.
“Seokjin hyung?” There’s a minor commotion in the back. “The meeting has been pushed back by half an hour.”
It’s Jungkook. Seokjin nods, the meeting seeming like a distant problem right now. “Okay.”
“Yeah, meaning we can probably grab breakfast before it. Do you want the staff to order something for you?”
As if on cue, his stomach churns at the thought of food. “Uh, no.”
“No?”
“Yeah. I’m not hungry.” Before Jungkook can argue further, Seokjin continues. “I have to go. I’ll be there soon.”
Hanging up, he finally pulls out from in front of Seulgi’s building, beginning his drive back home.
—
Sooah’s birthday lunch has been organised in a fancy, chic restaurant in central Seoul, on the top floor with added security and an exclusive invitation list. The sun is mild and there’s a gentle breeze in the air, making the balcony area a popular spot for many of the guests to enjoy the newly improved weather with cocktails and appetizers being served by well-dressed waiters.
Hoseok provides his name at the entrance and enters the party, hoping furtively that the group of girls just outside the building haven't spotted his face. He looks around; evidently, the birthday girl hasn't arrived yet. He declines a passing waiter's offer of a prawn tempura and makes a beeline for the first member he sees.
“Hey, hyung,” he says, slightly breathless as he reaches Yoongi. The older member had ended up bringing Jungkook, Namjoon and Taehyung from the company HQ, especially after the latter two had decided they wanted to drink freely at the party and not drive after that, leaving their cars still parked in the company basement.
Now, Yoongi, who’s been quiet all morning and is holding a glass of what looks like gin, nods in acknowledgement even though his gaze is fixed somewhere on the ground.
However, Hoseok can't begin to wonder what his problem is right now. “Okay, look,” he begins, looking around to make sure there's no one around. “I did something horrible. Well, no, not horrible,” he amends quickly. “It wasn't at all - okay, here's what it is, alright?” He swallows and takes a deep breath. “I hooked up with Chaeyoung,” he confesses in a single breath.
Yoongi, who'd been listening with his gaze still burning into the ground, finally looks at him. “Wow,” he says, raising his eyebrows. “Really? Isn't she, like, fifteen or something?”
“What? No!” Hoseok cries. “She's twenty-three! She's an adult - she’s as old as Jungkook! Well, slightly younger,” he admits.
“How much younger?”
“… eighteen months.”
Yoongi nods, then frowns. “Okay, well… it’s not that bad then. She’s old enough.”
“Yeah, but she’s -“ My childhood neighbour, a family friend, and Chanyeol’s baby sister. “… Chaeyoung,” he finishes uneasily. “Her brother is going to kill me,” he groans, dropping his face into his hands.
“Really? Why?” Yoongi shrugs. “It’s her life, right?”
“I mean, sure. But Chan is really protective of her, especially after their mother passed.” Hoseok doesn’t know how exactly to word it to someone who hasn't been there through it all, watching Chanyeol constantly keep an eye on the most important person in his life. Until she moved to Seoul and he asked me to take over.
“So?” Yoongi shrugs, then takes a sip of his drink. “It's her life,” she repeats. “He can't look out for her forever.”
Hoseok exhales, sensing that Yoongi isn't quite getting the point. “Okay, just imagine that I hooked up with your younger sister.”
Yoongi grimaces slightly. “Okay?”
“And imagine that I was your best friend, that we grew up together and I saw her grow up and I was… kind of a douche to her back then,” he mutters. “But then everyone grows up and suddenly I’m in the same city as her, you trusted me to look out for her - and instead I ended up in bed with her,” he finishes with a flourish. “What would you do?”
Yoongi squints, clearly trying to process this. “I… I don’t know, that’s a lot to keep track of. And you know what, I don’t have sisters so I really - I mean, I’m not the best person to ask. But you know who is?” he adds quickly, gesturing with his chin at something behind Hoseok.
Hoseok turns to see Namjoon finishing up a conversation with someone, clinking his glass with theirs cheerfully before they part ways.
“He’s your best friend, you kind of grew up together and he has a younger sister.” Yoongi counts them off one by one. “One he’s fairly protective of.”
“Is he?” Hoseok frowns. “Protective of his sister? Like he is with Kaya?”
“Well, it’s not the same situation but he’s protective by nature. And you’re just getting an opinion, not recreating it to the T,” Yoongi reminds him, nudging his shoulder. “He’s your guy.”
Hoseok considers this and nods, making his way over to Namjoon. Namjoon notices him approaching and smiles, which Hoseok returns with a slightly confused one of his own.
“Hoba!” Namjoon exclaims, clapping him on the back and almost knocking the wind out of him. “How’ve you been? Can I get you a drink?”
“Oh, uh… no, thanks.” Hoseok shakes his head but agrees to a wonton on the spread in front of them. Chewing, he observes Namjoon, who looks far happier than he can remember seeing him in recent times. It’s not unexpected, given how long he and Kaya spent apart.
Suddenly deciding he doesn’t want to think about why Namjoon looks so happy, he hurries to speak.
“So, uh… say I hooked up with your sister,” he begins quickly, only for Namjoon’s smile to disappear in an instant.
“You… what?” he exclaims, and his height suddenly seems looming.
Hoseok frowns before rolling his eyes. “Say,” he repeats, “that I hooked up with your sister.”
“Oh. Why?” When Hoseok doesn’t answer immediately, Namjoon raises his eyebrows. “Dude, did you sleep with someone’s sister?”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Hoseok takes a step back and raises his hands. “I did not sleep with her. We didn’t have sex - like, it was so not like that. Because sex is… we didn’t… I mean, no sex was had,” he finishes, his throat feeling dry.
“So I take it you didn’t have sex?”
“No, we didn’t.” But I may as well have, he thinks, flashes of last night surfacing in his mind. Her hair, her skin, her voice like he’d never heard it before… Hoseok sighs. “I went over to Chaeyoung’s last night and we… fooled around,” he confesses, hoping he won’t be asked to elaborate.
Namjoon is far too sensible to do that, fortunately. “Right. And… that’s a bad thing,” he states, as though waiting for Hoseok to confirm it.
He opens his mouth, knowing what he should say. “No,” he admits after a moment. “That’s the worst part, that nothing about it was bad at all.” He shakes his head even as his chest feels lighter for the first time all day. “It was incredible. And not just the - the hooking up, but being with her, laughing and talking… God, we talked all night,” he remembers, his eyes dropping to the floor.
Namjoon raises his eyebrows again, this time looking somewhat impressed. “Sounds like the dream,” he remarks deliberately.
“Yeah?”
“Totally. And clearly you know that because you’re getting that same little smile the thought of it,” he points out. “The one you guys used to tease me about?”
Hoseok immediately straightens his face, not even realising he’d been smiling. “Shut up.”
Namjoon shrugs serenely, finishing his drink and helping himself to a second. “You’re worried about her brother, though,” he guesses.
“More than worried.” He shakes his head and drops his face into his hands. “He’s going to think I totally betrayed him.”
“Did you, though?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking you,” he says urgently. “If I hooked up with your sister - your younger sister - while I’m your friend… what would you do?”
Namjoon frowns uncertainly, apparently thinking about it, then exhales. “I wouldn’t be thrilled,” he admits. “It would feel a little like you were going behind my back? Especially since… well, it’s my sister.” He winces, apparently realising he’s not doing a very good job at explaining this. “No guy ever wants to think about his little sister doing that, least of all with one of his friends.”
“That’s perfect,” mutters Hoseok.
“No, but you know - it’s a little different in Chanyeol’s case,” muses Namjoon, now leaning backwards against the table and pointing at the air, as though it’s an interesting problem he’s solving on an invisible whiteboard. “You actually grew up with him.”
“Isn’t that worse? Because not only did I grow up with him, I grew up with her. And Chan is…” He exhales tiredly. “She won’t believe me, but he’s always been extremely protective of her. Especially since their mom died. Emotionally, physically… I know him - there’s nothing in this world he would prioritise over his sister.”
Namjoon is quiet for a moment. “Is it because their mom died?”
“I don’t know. Probably,” he admits. “He was kind of like the golden child when they were young and she was always a little left out and overlooked… he never admitted it but I know he felt guilty about it. He always tried to make up for it and look after her more - even now, when she moved to Seoul.”
“Well, I can see that,” says Namjoon reasonably. “It’s difficult to see your younger sibling as anything other than a kid, especially when they’re that much younger. You thought of her as a kid, too, if I remember correctly,” he reminds him, irritatingly logical.
“But she’s not a kid anymore,” argues Hoseok. “I did think that at first but… she’s really not. She’s smart and insightful and - and she’s focused on her career. And she’s pragmatic - you know last night during the storm, she had hot water and instant ramen stocked up in case the power went out?” His eyes widen and he shrugs hugely. “Six of us in the dorm and not one of us thought to stock up on food. If I’m not wrong, Jungkook ate a bowl of cold kimchi for dinner while Taehyung ate half a block of cheese. And that was with the power on!”
Namjoon grimaces. “What was happening while I was gone?”
“And she made brownies!” Hoseok exclaims, ignoring his friend. “And they were good. And she was crocheting - she…” He takes a deep breath. “She gave me a crocheted bear,” he tells Namjoon in a low voice. “And I don’t know if she put some kind of spell on it, but for some reason, it won’t leave my pocket.”
Namjoon raises his eyebrows but Hoseok can’t seem to stop talking - not now that he’s finally saying out loud things that have been swimming in his brain for months.
“She’s cute and she’s funny - and she’s got this killer confidence. Where did that even come from?” he demands. “She used to be all shy and awkward before but now she’s… oh, and she’s started giving advice now? Good advice, incidentally, and I just want to… I just want to talk to her all the time because sometimes it really feels like she can solve every single one of my problems. And honestly, after last night…” Hoseok runs a hand through his hair, glancing at Namjoon’s expression and hating it, “Namjoon, believe me… she’s a grown woman.”
There’s a few seconds of silence where Hoseok fights the urge to yell incomprehensibly into the abyss.
“So… I know you guys don’t really like it when I do this,” begins Namjoon slowly, “but if I understand it correctly, your problem isn’t so much that you slept with Chaeyoung -“
“I didn’t sleep with -“
“- it’s that you’re falling in love with Chaeyoung,” he finishes, nodding as though explaining a rather simple maths problem without wanting to hurt his feelings.
“I’m - I’m not,” murmurs Hoseok, even as his heart sinks for more often than not, Namjoon is right.
“But that changes things,” says Namjoon. “If you actually had feelings for my sister - real feelings, and I was convinced that you weren’t just messing around with her… I would actually be kind of okay with it. It would be weird,” he admits, shuddering a little, “but it wouldn’t be the worst thing. I’m sure it would be the same with Chanyeol. No?”
Hoseok shakes his head. It isn’t as if the thought hasn’t occurred to him, but if there’s one person who knows Chanyeol, it’s him.
“You know, it might? Except, when we were growing up, I was a dick to Chaeyoung,” he admits in a low voice, the shame and guilt bubbling deep in his stomach. “He was protecting her from his parents and his step-mom and other kids… but he was also protecting her from me.”
He doesn’t say it out loud - he can’t, because it’s too shameful, that the one and only time that Chanyeol ever snapped at him, the only time Hoseok ever felt that he could lose his best friend was when he’d warned him to stop making fun of his little sister.
It had been when they were in high school. Hoseok had taken it way down after that, choosing only to tease her in a more playful way or ignore her altogether, usually when Chanyeol wasn’t around. But it was undeniable that even though they’d moved past it, Hoseok had crossed a line.
Until now.
“I’m the last person Chanyeol will be okay with, being with his sister,” he states, knowing it’s true.
Namjoon doesn’t say anything for a few seconds. “Look, Hobi… that was years ago. You were a kid.” He seems to spot something behind Hoseok’s shoulder. “What’s more important is how she feels about your past.”
Hoseok is about to open his mouth when his phone pings at the same time as Namjoon’s. Similar pings are heard throughout the room and when he checks his phone, it’s to see a message on a group chat.
Jimin [13:04] We’re on our way up. Everyone get ready!
As promised, less than a minute later, they hear the lift open and Jimin’s voice sing-song as he speaks. A moment later, he appears at the doorway with Sooah, his face breaking into a cherubic smile as he gestures to the room with a flourish.
“Surprise!”
All the guests chorus together and Sooah, after gasping and seemingly suffering a mild heart attack, begins greeting people who come forward to hug her. Hoseok and Namjoon hang back, allowing her school friends to greet her first, including Taehyung, while Jimin stands beside her proudly, evidently satisfied with her reaction. It’s then that Hoseok sees her.
“Oh, my God, she’s here,” he breathes, instantly turning away but unable to do so for long. He chances a glance at her as he half-hides behind Namjoon’s broad frame; in an oversized striped pink sweater, a short denim skirt, sheer pink stockings and black combat boots, she looks like an ice cream - a cute, pink, irresistible ice cream with slightly flushed cheeks and long wavy hair. Bubblegum punk, he’d said to her once and here she is, clearly embracing it.
“Okay, the worst thing you can do is be dramatic about this,” warns Namjoon. “Just go and talk to her like everything’s - wait,” he says suddenly. “What did you say to her this morning?”
“Oh. Well, I didn’t want to wake her up, so -”
Namjoon turns around with his eyebrows high on his forehead. “You snuck out?” he whispers loudly.
“No! I mean, technically - but I needed to leave for that meeting and my phone was dead so I couldn’t text her. And I didn’t want to wake her up,” he adds defensively, anticipating the question. “Don’t worry, I left her a note.”
“A note?”
“Yeah, and it was a nice note,” he says shortly. “Whatever I do, I’m not going to screw her over like that.”
They go over to greet the birthday girl after that, once the crowd thins out. Hoseok catches Chaeyoung’s eye for the briefest of moments, feeling his heart skip an enormous beat. But she moves away and he follows her slender figure going to place her present on the gift table.
“... thought it was going to be just a small lunch, you and me. You didn’t have to go through all this…”
“I wanted to give you a surprise… don’t you like it?”
“Oh, of course I do, Chim…”
Sooah leans up to press a kiss to Jimin’s cheek, who looks mollified when he spots them, followed by Sooah. “Hey, guys,” she says, leaning up to hug them in turn as they chorus their own happy birthdays to her. “Thank you for coming, I know how busy you all are.”
“Where’s Seokjin hyung?” Jimin asks, scanning the room.
“He said he wasn’t feeling up to it. He says sorry,” adds Hoseok apologetically, while Sooah waves a hand. “He did look quite off even during the meeting this morning.”
Jimin murmurs something noncommittal but shrugs, evidently deciding to let it go when Taehyung and Jungkook join them as well, deep in discussion that abruptly stops when they come into earshot.
“Namjoon oppa, Jimin told me you just got back from New Zealand,” says Sooah. “How was it?”
“Oh, yeah, you never told us,” adds Jungkook. “Did you do the ziplining thing this time?” he asks excitedly
Namjoon takes a sip of his drink and shakes his head. “No, no, we didn’t,” he answers, chuckling.
“Oh. Well, you must have gone to Milford Sound - he was obsessed with that place the last time we were there,” remembers Hoseok. “Remember? You wanted to stay there longer but the staff made us leave. That’s the kind of place Kaya would like, too.”
“Oh, yeah. It was really nice - but I don’t know, we never really got around to doing that,” he admits.
“Okay.” Jungkook frowns. “What about that Lord of the Rings hike? That’s right up your alley.”
“Er… no. Didn’t end up doing that either.”
Hoseok frowns. “So what did you do for three weeks?”
There’s a few moments where no one speaks and Namjoon doesn’t answer, opting instead to take a long, slow sip of wine and ending it with a soft smack of his lips, all the while when Hoseok finds himself slowly regretting his question.
“Oh. Oh, God.” He swallows before groaning. Jungkook’s ears go red while Sooah and Jimin snort, and Taehyung claps him on the shoulder as they all disperse, clicking his tongue and winking at him.
“Don’t prolong it,” murmurs Namjoon to Hoseok before he leaves, his eyes clearly on Chaeyoung. “Just be normal with her.”
“Right. Normal.” It’s easier said than done, for Hoseok discovers that he’s barely able to look at Chaeyoung without thinking about last night. His feelings for her were tending towards a problematic region long before this, but something had changed irreversibly last night. There was no scope for denial anymore, he realises, not about his attraction to her or deeper emotions that make his stomach flip.
Worst of all, it’s the looming thought of Chanyeol following him every time she enters his mind. He would lose Chanyeol over this, he knows it. Hoseok didn’t think losing Chanyeol would ever even be worthy of consideration in his mind - until Chaeyoung, looking like a cute, pretty, sensitive ice cream.
He drifts towards the table of hors d'oeuvres, trying to force an appetite. Nothing looks appealing, though, not now, but he scans it anyway hopefully. Someone else arrives at the table, and he smells her before he sees her.
“Hi,” says Chaeyoung, giving him a small smile and picking up a small chocolate at the edge of the table.
It’s too much: her summery perfume, her shiny hair, the memory of her naked rib cage underneath his palms while she sighed his name in a way that would make Chanyeol punch him in the face if he knew. He exhales shakily as she takes a step closer to him; even though they aren’t even slightly touching, the proximity makes his heart race and to his horror, he can feel his jeans tighten.
“What are you doing?” he asks in a low voice, dropping all pretense and turning to her.
She raises her eyebrows. “I’m saying hi,” she answers, not sounding even a fraction as frazzled as he feels. She does look… happy to see him, though. The thought makes his heart leap and hurt at the same time.
“Listen, Chae,” he begins, because he just can’t do this. She nods, looking casual and breezy, her cheeks with a hint of pink still on them.
“Yeah?”
“Look, last night was… amazing,” he admits, noting how, despite the casual demeanour she’s displaying, a smile begins creeping up on her face as well. Her lips are pink, too, and glossy… “It was amazing and - and you’re amazing.” Her smile widens slightly and her cheeks flush a little brighter and Hoseok feels his strength start to leave him bit by bit. “But it can’t happen again. No matter how I feel… Chanyeol is still my best friend and you’re still his sister and… you are so off limits.”
Chaeyoung doesn’t seem fazed. Her smile fades slightly but not completely and she licks her lips, as though able to see right through him. “It’s a little late for that, I think,” she says lightly, brushing a lock of hair off her neck.
Be still, my heart. “No, it’s not. I mean, it… yeah. Maybe.” He looks at the floor and exhales deliberately, trying to gather his thoughts. “But it can’t go further. I - I really hope you understand, Chae,” he implores, meeting her eyes, wide and doe-like. “You’re amazing,” he repeats, meaning it, “but…”
She doesn’t say anything for a moment, then nods. “Okay.” Giving him that same small, nonchalant smile, she pops the piece of chocolate in her mouth and walks away.
—
Seokjin wakes up from the worst sleep he’s encountered in a while - and that includes the tour they’ve just wrapped up.
It had taken him a long time to fall asleep. Once he’d finally managed to somewhat numb himself to the fact that he’d just been dumped because his girlfriend thought he’d cheated on her, he’d tried to close his eyes and get just a little while of nothingness. But he felt wrung out; he was emotionally so exhausted that it was hard to even sleep, especially because he knew, he knew, that while his break-up with Seulgi was affecting him, it was the fact that he didn't even know how Nari fit into all this.
Well, he knew. He had an idea and he was aware of the general area in which Nari was involved, but all his strength was going into not thinking about that right now because it was a Pandora’s box he didn't want to rifle through at the moment.
Then, of course, the moment he’d tried to catch a few winks, his phone had started buzzing with updates from Sooah's birthday lunch. Jimin hadn't taken it too well when Seokjin had told him after the meeting that he wouldn't be able to make it and while he hadn't been able to bring himself to explain why, something in his expression must have done it for him, for Jimin had abruptly stopped pestering him and told him to stop by if he felt better.
He checks his phone now, realising he's slept through lunch. The late afternoon sun is already dimming, as though warning the city of an early sunset. He sits up on the couch, his back hurting and head pounding and heart racing from the vague dream he'd had of Seulgi imprisoning him in an underground jail while Namjoon appeared as a hologram and read a list of his crimes.
You're a decent guy, but it loses its charm when there's another woman in the picture.
It was like a sick twist of fate, the momentary relief that Seulgi was breaking up with him until it turned to dread when he realised why she was breaking up with him. And the other woman in the picture… Seokjin runs a hand across his face, knowing that it wouldn't have made anything better if he'd try to explain why he was wearing Nari's joggers in the first place.
No, I wasn't sleeping with her - not at all. I went to her place in the storm to wish her a happy half-birthday in line with a decades-old tradition, we splashed around in the rain for a while where an accidental kiss took place, and then she offered me dry clothes and her couch for the night because she's a doctor and she was worried about hypothermia.
It sounds ridiculous - not to mention like a rather trite story. He'd taken off the joggers the moment he'd entered the dorm, throwing on the first pair of trousers he'd found in his room before driving away for his meeting. He'd chucked it in the washing machine after getting back and then the dryer, and in the absence of anything else to do except overthink his ended relationship, Seokjin stalks over to the dryer and retrieves the washed joggers. Without sitting back down, he collects his keys and prepares to drive over to Nari's.
It will be therapeutic, he supposes, to get rid of the immediate cause of his break-up. Plus, he would get the opportunity to apologise to Nari again - for staying over last night, for accidentally kissing her, maybe for showing up at all.
As he nears her building, he slows down. The street is still empty, although the water guns are no longer where they were last night. It’s almost as though the evidence of what transpired has been wiped away clean; Seokjin can’t decide whether that’s supposed to be a good thing.
There’s a good chance she won’t be home right now, he realises. But he still parks the car where he had last night and steps out, folded joggers in hand, looking up at the corridor window that had blown away her notes last night. It’s open and gives him a direct view of her front door.
Just then, as if on cue, the door opens. Seokjin’s stomach leaps without warning - for she’s home - and despite the bad day he’s had so far, a ghost of a smile graces his face.
Nari appears at the door, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. Seokjin takes a step forward but halts immediately in his tracks when she breaks into a relieved sort of smile and she opens the door wider - and someone else appears into view.
It’s a man. It’s him - Jason or whoever - who she’d brought to dinner at his place. She’d maintained that they were simply colleagues but either she’d been lying or the situation had changed since then, but Seokjin is motionless as he watches Jason kiss her casually on the cheek as she moves aside to let him in.
Maybe it’s the culmination of an already dismal day or it’s the unexpected nature of this discovery, but nothing that’s happened so far has crushed his chest quite so viscerally. Seokjin almost hopes he’s mistaking someone else for Nari or it’s a friendly, platonic, even brotherly situation - he’s grasping at straws mentally, even as Jason steps inside and the door closes behind him.
—
Near the late afternoon, when the sunlight starts to become sparse, the party starts to wrap up. Guests begin saying goodbye, passing by the table piled high with gifts on their way to the lift, many people happily day drunk and stumbling out.
“Did you know Sooah had this many friends?” Yoongi mutters, sidling up to Hoseok. He looks longingly at the drinks table next to them, now with far more empty bottles than when they'd first arrived.
“I didn't know someone could have this many friends,” he admits, somewhat admiringly. Across the hall, she looks appropriately engaged, swaying to the Justin Bieber track playing on the speaker and talking to two people as she sipped on a cocktail with a straw. A little way away, Jimin, Taehyung and two other guys he'd never seen before were aggressively popping to the song while simultaneously filming each other and guffawing.
“Sounds like a lot of work.” Yoongi sighs and shoves his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “When do you want to head out? Because I could use a drink.”
“Oh, is that why you've been sober all day?” Hoseok chuckles. “That’s adorable, hyung. You're like the mother hen trying to get her chickens to walk in a straight line before doing anything else.”
“That's me. Do you see the other chickens around? Namjoon and Jungkook are sharing a cigarette on the balcony,” he notes.
“Jimin and Taehyung are over there, although I’m guessing Jimin will be with Sooah. I don't think they're all Sooah's friends,” he says after a moment. “They aren't close friends at least. I think they're mostly old classmates and stuff that she's kind of in touch with. Jimin just goes all out.”
“He told you that?”
“Not exactly,” he mutters, his gaze moving to the one figure he's been glancing at continuously. Chaeyoung is by the appetiser station again, a clear drink in her hand as she fingers the edge of one of the food cards. Her bottom lip is between her teeth and she's frowning.
As he watches, a friend of Sooah's joins her and says something, to which she nods and laughs politely. He responds and she shrugs, a bit uncertainly, before picking up a single French fry and popping it in her mouth.
“Did you talk to her?”
Hoseok doesn't bother beating around the bush and inquiring who Yoongi is referring to. “Kind of. Went better than I anticipated, actually.”
“Really?” Yoongi raises his eyebrows. “What did you say to her?”
“Told her last night was fun and all but it can't happen again.” Hoseok turns away from her. “She seemed fine with it.”
“You don't sound fine with it.”
“What do you mean? I'm the one who suggested it.”
“You don't sound fine with the fact that she was fine with it.”
Hoseok glares at Yoongi but doesn’t argue. He turns to Chaeyoung again, this time a bit more alert when he notices her grabbing her sling bag, clearly ready to leave. He follows her pink, wavy-haired figure as she floats over to Sooah and presumably wishes her again before giving her a hug.
He frowns as their interaction continues: Chaeyoung asks her something and Sooah responds easily, tilting her head and giggling as she points to Jimin. Chaeyoung’s face falls for a fraction of a second before it’s replaced with a smile and a nod. They hug again and this time, Chaeyoung starts to leave.
As she does, she meets Hoseok’s eyes. His heart stops briefly but she simply gives him a casual wave and a small smile, before stepping into the lift and waiting for the doors to close.
Hoseok swallows, his mind going a mile a minute for the next few seconds. “Hyung,” he says, “you’re taking the rest of the chickens back to HQ?”
“You know it.” Yoongi follows Hoseok’s gaze. “You have your car?”
Hoseok nods before clapping him on the back and dashing off in the same direction as Chaeyoung. He takes the stairs two at a time and spills out into the lobby of the building, head darting around and spotting a telltale pair of pink stockinged legs disappearing around the corner outside the glass doors.
He follows her, jogging a bit until he’s within earshot. He calls her name and she turns, looking surprised but not altogether disappointed at his presence.
“Hey,” she says, as though they’ve coincidentally run into each other on a normal day. Behind her, the sun is far away at the horizon, a bright spot peeking through the clouds as it prepares to set. Right now, though, it’s difficult to pay attention to it.
“Leaving already?” he asks, a little uselessly, but it’s just occurred to him that he has no idea why he followed her out.
“Yeah, I guess. Most people are gone,” she says. “Plus… I don’t really know anybody there apart from Sooah herself. And you,” she adds with a smile when he raises his eyebrows. She doesn’t say anything else but Hoseok suddenly feels guilty, for three hours at a party not knowing anyone can’t be easy.
“You know the other guys, though,” he says after a moment. “Jimin and, uh…”
“Yeah, I was hanging out with Jungkook for a while.” She nods, fingering the strap of her bag. “It’s getting late, though.”
The decent thing to do would be to offer her a ride. He’s on the verge of doing it; now that he’s here in front of her, everything he’d told her earlier today seems vague and blurry and, frankly, unimportant.
“I’m sorry, Chae.”
She frowns. “Oh, don’t be. It wasn’t that bad - like, the food was good and I got a few nice pictures -“
“No, not about that.”
“Oh.” She licks her lips and nods once. “About that… don’t be sorry about that either. I get it - it’s weird. We’re practically family and you and my brother especially are -“
“Nope. Not that either.”
She stares at him blankly. “I’m out of guesses.”
“I'm sorry for…” What’s more important is how she feels about your past. Namjoon, ever the wise one, had touched upon the only element in this mess that could bring Hoseok out of his pit of guilt about Chanyeol: Chaeyoung.
“Yeah?”
He takes a deep breath. “I'm sorry for everything. Everything I did when we were kids, everything I said…” He bites his lip as she processes this, her eyes flickering slightly before they fall to the ground. “I was a huge jerk to you. And I know I was a kid, too, and so were you… but that doesn't mean that it all just disappears when we grow up. I know over the last year we've… gotten closer -”
Her lips twitch and his cheeks grow warm. He hurries his next words.
“- but I still want to say, explicitly, that I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Chae.”
Something massive seems to have been lifted off his chest but a dull pressure still lingers, pulsating in rhythm with his heart beat. Chaeyoung nods again, slowly, and meets his eyes.]]
“Apology accepted,” she says softly.
The pressure recedes; she feels more within reach than ever. It seems unbelievable that not twenty-four hours ago, she'd been on his lap in a state of undress, kissing him while it poured outside, making every other thought in his mind disappear.
“And I'm sorry, too,” she says after a moment, jerking him out of his dangerous train of thought. “I wasn't mean but I was… pretty clingy. Kids get teased mercilessly at that age over a haircut so I'm sure a kid who acted like… well, like me wouldn't have been easy,” she admits, two pink spots appearing on her pale cheeks.
Hoseok wants to kiss her, so desperately. It takes everything in him to stay rooted to the spot, even though there isn't a single part of him that wants to stay away from her. He should, but for the life of him, he can't quite remember why right now.
Chaeyoung exhales, looking slightly awkward but somewhat relieved - or maybe Hoseok is and he's projecting. Either way, she rocks backwards on the heels of her shoes and shrugs. “Well, I'm going to head,” she says abruptly, the pink tinge on her cheeks still visible. “And… thanks.”
“You're walking?”
“Yeah. After the rain last night it's actually kind of nice. And not totally dark yet,” she adds, looking up at the sky.
He should offer her a ride.
“Can I walk you home?” he blurts, pausing internally as he thinks about his car in the parking lot.
She looks surprised, too. “Um, are you sure? Don't you have to get back to the party?”
“Oh, no, the party is almost dead, anyway,” he says, waving a hand dismissively. “Even Sooah and Jimin seem to be almost done. I'm sure they'll leave in a bit.”
“And to no one's surprise, she's going back to his place.” Chaeyoung shakes her head. “Wow, I've clearly had one too many mojitos.”
Hoseok snickers. “Don't worry about it. With what I think their plans are tonight, you don't want them in the room next to you.”
She wrinkles her nose and then laughs. “True. But you don't have to walk me home. I'm fine.”
“I don't mind. Really.”
“It's, like, a thirty minute walk.”
“Fortunately, I’m kind of good when it comes to stamina.”
Chaeyoung narrows her eyes and folds her arms across her chest. Ice cream, he thinks instantly, and begins to smile without meaning to.
“Why did you apologise?”
“What do you mean?” He shrugs. “It's the right thing to do.”
“Sure, but why today?”
His heart starts to race - or skip, and he simply shrugs. “Seemed like as good a day as any.”
Chaeyoung doesn’t change her stance. “Are you sure?”
The way she asks it, she seems to have caught onto something. It’s too knowing and Hoseok feels his smile getting wider.
“You’re a pain in my ass, caterpillar.”
That makes her laugh - an open, confident laugh and Hoseok’s heart soars.
“Have been, since two thousand four,” she agrees. “Except, obviously, you apologised for all that.”
“You’re going to be a handful.” The words are out of his mouth before he can control them but he finds he doesn’t mind. Chaeyoung’s smile fades slightly and she bites her lip, the sun starting to set behind her.
“You can walk me home,” she says after a moment, turning around but not moving. Hoseok hesitates for the briefest of moments but joins her as she starts walking, their fingers only inches apart.
—
Yoongi drives in silence, while Namjoon, Jungkook and Taehyung sing along to an old song from a TV show. For members of a world famous band, they all sound terrible - but he supposes that is a talent in itself. In the shotgun seat, Jungkook bounces to the song in the passenger seat while Taehyung adds his own ad-libs throughout, but Yoongi has no energy to tell them to stop.
They near the building and he drives into the basement parking, somewhat dreading going up to his studio. He parks and everybody climbs out; Jungkook mumbles something about the gym while Taehyung makes a phone call and they drift away. Namjoon hangs back, waiting for the younger members to leave their earshot before turning to Yoongi.
“Are you alright, hyung?”
“Bitchin’.” He catches Namjoon’s eye and sighs. “Yeah, I’m fine. Had a rough night, that’s all.”
“Because of the rain?”
That, too. “Yeah. The good news is, I get to go edit debut tracks for a rookie group for the next eight hours.” He clicks his tongue.
Namjoon nods. “You want some company?”
“Maybe later. Once you sober up,” he adds, cracking a smile. Namjoon chuckles good-naturedly before clearing his throat.
“I, uh, didn’t want to say anything in front of the others, but… I found this in the back seat.” He fishes something out of his pocket and hands it to Yoongi. Yoongi opens his hand automatically, his stomach turning weakly when a small, bright green earring falls into his palm.
The hook of the earring digs into his palm when he enters the top floor of the building. Yoongi takes a seat at an empty table in the open floor pantry and pulls out his phone, scrolling through his emails. The floor is busier than usual; some team seems to be celebrating a colleague’s birthday at another table, a cake with white icing and a couple of slices messily cut out sitting in the centre of the circle; one producer sits alone at a table with noise cancelling headphones on and typing aggressively on his laptop.
Yoongi looks around absently when his eyes land on the coffee station where - something pounds into his chest - he locks eyes with Miso. She holds his gaze for a couple of seconds before turning her back on him and dealing with her coffee.
The earring feels heavy in his hand and all of a sudden, he feels the urge to hurl it out of the window. There is next to no way it’s making it back to its owner in any case. After Miso had icily got into her car outside the motel this morning and Seungwan had driven her away, Yoongi had walked out of the room and watched her leave, proceeding to smoke two full cigarettes in the chilly morning.
The receptionist from last night had also appeared and he’d offered her a cigarette voluntarily, for she looked rather drained as well. Something about how quiet and isolated the place was, not a sound anywhere or even a breath except for the person next to him, made Yoongi feel so disconnected from everything that he felt numb. It was too early, too cold and too unfair. Next to him, the receptionist had chucked her half-smoked cigarette on the ground.
“You didn’t finish that,” stated Yoongi, not really caring.
She’d glanced at him before turning to look ahead, and Yoongi noticed for the first time the carnage from the storm in front of the motel: tree trucks, piles of scattered branches and leaves, water accumulated and overflowing from a ridge in the ground.
“Fuck it,” she’d said.
Maybe it was the aftermath of a terrible night or some sort of shared dissatisfaction with the world but fifteen minutes later, they were in the backseat of Yoongi’s car. It was quick, casual and ended almost as abruptly as it began, with both of them adjusting their clothes and going their separate ways with a brief, formal goodbye.
It seems like ages ago now, with Miso across the room from him, getting coffee outside her studio. Yoongi lowers his head and stares at his phone screen, not reading anything. From the corner of his eye, he sees her turn around and walk in his direction; she would have to pass him to return to her studio.
He can’t think about their argument last night any longer. It’s been rattling around in his mind all day: the rage, the guilt, the desperate desire to sit her down in front of him and read her damn mind. Most of all, there’s an inkling of shame somewhere, deep down, in knowing that his reaction last night had been exactly what she’d expected.
That’s what it had looked like, at least; her eyes had shuttered over at some point and she’d reverted to the old Miso, the one who seemed to live to annoy him and gave nothing, no indication of who she was or what she was thinking. Her walls that he’d worked so hard to make a crack in had gone up instantly, except this time there was a disappointment there he’d never encountered before.
A flash in front of him jerks him away from the table: a hand appears momentarily, placing a cup of iced coffee in front of him with a small thud, before disappearing. Heart racing in mild shock, he turns to see Miso walking away without a second glance, her fingers wrapped around another cup as she turns the corner of the corridor.
He stares at the cup. Sip it first, he’d say ordinarily, straight-faced with only a hint of irony. You’re just going to have to trust me, Min Suga, she’d say, shrugging and settling into her chair, giving him a challenging raise of the eyebrows.
Yoongi takes a sip of the cold liquid, feeling it coat his throat and savouring the hit of caffeine. After a moment, he gets up and heads down the corridor, stopping at Donghyuk’s studio and pausing before he knocks.
“Come in,” comes Miso’s voice, dry and uninterested.
Yoongi pushes open the door slowly to see her alone at the console, a laptop open in front of her and a singular lamp at the other end of the room being the only source of light. She looks at him very briefly before going back to her work. It almost seems as though she expected him to follow her; he can’t tell if she’s happy about it, though.
“Thanks for the coffee,” he says.
She simply nods in response, scrolling through something on the laptop.
“Listen,” he says again, placing the coffee on a table next to him and running a hand tiredly through his hair. “I need to tell you something.”
“Okay.”
“Last night…” He trails off for a moment, wishing he’d rehearsed this a bit before coming in here. “Well, firstly, I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have… anyway. Sorry.”
Miso finally turns to him, looks him up and down, and then turns back around. “‘Kay. Is that it?”
“No.” He exhales. “I hooked up with someone this morning. After you left, the receptionist and I… we had sex.” He cringes inwardly at his own words but he can’t fathom how else to say it without mincing words. She’s still looking at her laptop; he isn’t sure if he’s imagining it, but her shoulders stiffen slightly. “Anyway. I just wanted to let you know.”
There’s a beat of silence. Then -
“So?”
“So?”
“Why are you telling me?” she asks, shrugging and turning around briefly. “I’m not your girlfriend.”
“I know you’re not. But…” He frowns, trying to suppress the annoyance in his stomach that’s already threatening to bubble up. “I’m just letting you know. Transparency and all that.”
“But it’s none of my business.”
Yoongi closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, counts to three and slowly exhales. “Right. Well. It’s just something normal people do, I guess. Talk to each other and communicate when they’re…”
She turns around properly this time, her legs folded and her elbows resting on her thighs. “When they’re…” She raises her eyebrows. “When they’re hooking up? We made out a few times… are you telling me because of that?”
He doesn’t respond; he can barely look at her right now, anger and embarrassment creeping into his chest now.
“This is exactly what I was afraid of, Yoongi,” she says knowingly, as though she’s pointing out an unsatisfactory edit to a track. “I told you to stay away. But you didn’t listen. You stayed, you got attached, and you’re telling me about a one-night stand you had. And now you have some kind of… expectation of me when what you really should have done was stay away right from the start.”
“You know what? I’m starting to think the same thing,” he snaps, shaking his head and going to grab his coffee. “I guess forming an attachment with an ice queen is my lesson.”
“You got me attached, too.” It’s the only thing that makes him stop in his tracks. “And that’s the problem with getting attached - you start to care. And then when you find out something that you can’t help, something that’s out of your control and doesn’t fit the image of me you have in your mind - the damsel that needs saving because, admit it, that’s what I am to you right now - it shatters everything.”
Yoongi grits his teeth, but somewhere his throat starts to hurt. He grips the cup and turns around slowly to see her still sitting in the same position, face and voice unnaturally calm.
He needs to choose his words carefully, he knows, but she makes it impossible to think. “I do care,” he begins slowly in a low voice, staring at the floor. “You can make it out to be whatever saviour complex you want but I do care and I do want to help you and be there for you. What is wrong with you that you won’t let me?” he demands tightly, clenching his fist at his side.
“Because it won’t work,” she continues in that same state of forced calm. “This - this challenge? You can spend weeks and months and do all-nighters and collaborate with whoever you want but it’s not going to work. It’s beyond you now. And once you realise that, it’s just going to be an abandoned project. A file somewhere in your computer you just couldn’t crack. I don’t need to be saved,” she says after a moment. “So it’s better for you that you stop trying. And maybe you won’t be so disappointed anymore.”
Yoongi stares at her, her impassive eyes and slouched figure. It’s exhausting; he’s tired and drained and helpless and she simply moves farther and farther away each time.
“You got it, Kang Chanel,” he mutters. “I’ll stay away.” Not wanting to spend a second longer in here, he turns around and walks out of the studio.
Miso watches him leave, using every bit of strength in her to keep her mind blank, to push every single thought and emotion out and, for just a few hours, focus on something that isn’t her clusterfuck of a life. She spends the next few hours alone in the studio, eating take-out from a box and going on a Zoom meeting with Donghyuk.
When it’s nearly midnight, hours longer than she’d thought she’d stay (but wishing she could for longer), she begins to wrap up, saving and closing demo files and packing up her notebook, when her inbox pings.
“Damn it, Donghyuk,” she sighs, bending over to squint at the screen in the dark. Her heart skips a beat when she sees an instant message from Min, Yoongi. Index finger hovering over the mouse, she takes a deep breath and opens it. It’s a screenshot of what looks like a folder on a Mac laptop, but empty. She frowns when her laptop pings again.
[Prod Suga] [00:02] [screenshot] This is all the abandoned projects I’ve had in ten years. Happy to stay away, but don’t you dare call yourself a project ever again.
—
Thanks for reading. Don't forget to leave a review :)
#seokjin x oc#seokjin fanfic#yoongi fanfic#yoongi x oc#hoseok x oc#hoseok fanfic#thebtswritersclub#bangtanwhq#k-vanity#houseofddaeng#wkcnet#bts jin fanfic#bts suga fanfic#bts suga angst#bts jin angst#bts jhope fanfic
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top 10 obizenyuki moments (+all of the honorable mentions that i almost picked bc these three are too much .) DISCLAIMER: these are my opinions and also i talk a lot. <3
under the cut bc this is so long oh my god
number 10
THIS PANEL OF THEM BEING SO AT PEACE RESTING BY EACH OTHER'S SIDE. OBI DEEP IN CONTEMPLATION AS HE WATCHES OVER SHIRAYUKI AND ZEN. THEM SLEEPING SO SOUNDLY BECAUSE THEY CAN LET DOWN THEIR GUARD AROUND HIM. I'M FINE.
every time i see this panel i just feel so happy. they belong together.
number 9
needless to say you'll miss the young miss, but you'll be lonely without me too, i bet. this entire conversation . obi saying this as a light joke but also because he knows how much they both mean to zen. obi searching, in a way, for a reassurance that he /is/ needed and wanted as well, since it's so obvious that shirayuki would be. zen's response. this is a moment that shirayuki isn't physically in so i bumped it down a few places, but it's still so meaningful for the ot3.
number 8
obi longing for zen and telling his bestie (zen's gf, who he's known for also occasionally longing for) about it casually under the stars (and saying he'll say that to zen under the stars) . i know what you are .
this moment is absolutely iconic and one of my personal favorites <3
number 7
ot3 date <3333 the entire next chapter is just a bunch of cute moments of them (honestly could have had like 300 pics on this post if there wasn't a limit). them spending time together, goofing off, having fun and enjoying each other's company. give me 10 more of these dates please.
number 6
whenever i reach out my hand, you would grasp it?
the most iconic trio of all time you will not change my mind. this moment being an unsaid promise between the three of them to always come back to each other . lay me to rest
number 5
THE FACT THAT YOU'RE NOT DASHING OVER TO HER RIGHT NOW IS ALL THE ANSWER I NEED. THE TRUST. GOD. SHE CAN HANDLE HIM. I'M ON THE GROUND.
this moment is not as talked about (at least i haven't seen much of it discussed) but it's SO important to me. so much is being said without needing to spell it out. obi and zen keeping watch from afar, content in each other's company but also making sure shirayuki is in their sight. this is so romantic to do under the stars . they make me unwell. i need a vacation
number 4
obi and shirayuki always keeping zen in their hearts no matter what, despite him wishing not to weigh on them. this also touching on zen telling obi he wishes the title he gave him won't be a burden to him. the bond they have is highlighted so beautifully here. it's pure love <3 i'm sick to my stomach. /j
(& the bonus of obi and shirayuki seeing zen off together and looking at his retreating figure fondly. this is so romantic . i'm crazy .)
number 3
the iconic whenever i'm with you two it's always like this ;^;; <3 obi's love towards these two started to take root here. you don't understand because it's love dude . you don't understand because you were never attached to someone like this. you never had a home to come back to, never had the acceptance and understanding you have in them. dumbass. (said fondly)
it's okay, he learns it later <3
number 2
zen, furiously questioning obi and shirayuki on their health, making sure they're fine, and finally pulling them into a hug. his relief to have them safe and healthy in his arms. them realizing how worried he was . this is probably the most iconic obznyk moment and is a contender for n1 for sure, it was tough choosing between the n1&n2 moments ;; . god this moment. zen's "that's the most important thing" . don't talk to me i love them
number 1
the iconic line that is also my ship tag, if it's for you and mistress, i'm willing to go anywhere </3 this moment was what solidified the ship for me when i was only an anime only (shudders) slowly getting into the fandom. the anime was enough but this entire chapter had me setting my house on fire (joke). the brainworms never stopped. the entire chapter is so crazy ot3 but this moment is my favorite and overall the message/highlight of obi's resolve & his answer to zen's questions. it also showed more than any other moment obi's love & dedication to shirayuki and zen. shirayuki isn't even in this scene but it's still my favorite ot3 moment in the manga so far <3
and now, some honorable mentions. these following moments were all contenders for top 10 bc obznyk is so good. also these are not all of the obznyk moments in the manga ofc. there are many that i couldn't find in my screenshots and tried to find skimming through the manga but failed lol. these are just some classics/faves.
zen's iconic heart eyes
pretty early on in their relationship development, zen liking seeing them together ;;
zen being so happy around obi and shirayuki ;-;
zen introducing himself as obi and shirayuki's companion <3 it's just spelled out at this point lol
zen's heart eyes pt 100, if this post didn't have a limit i would've posted so many more of these
shirayuki and zen fretting over obi and then spying on him (while obi knows and is having the time of his life stringing them along) because he was seen with a pretty lady
it's like a part of me is always by their side <3 <3 <3 this would've been n10, but it's now the official number 11 moment
shirayuki and zen putting their full trust in obi to the point of fully letting their guard down, and obi realizing that for the first time, he's wholeheartedly wanted.
zen and shirayuki being the obi detection/protection squad <3
there's so much more. i love them so much <333333
#akagami no shirayukihime#obizenyuki#zen wisteria#ans obi#ans shirayuki#ans manga#akagami no shirayukihime manga#ans manga caps#obi ans#shirayuki ans#ot3: i'm willing to go anywhere#if yall doubted my obznyk craziness. i wrote a literal essay on how perfect they are for each other like 4 years ago.#its still sitting in my google docs lol#anyway sorry for typing soo much . this took so long#okay just checked bc i have no concept of time. it was two years ago lol.
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After screenshotting my original 1:27 am rant just for safekeeping and returning to this line of thought, I think I would like to swing this bat at a hornets nest . And I shall call it ;
BG3 And Polyamory, AKA The Discourse From The Eyes Of The Polyamorous
Hi, I am now disclosing the polyamorous part of my queer identity to the internet. Yay! Remember, I am only one polyamorous person on this website and I am not the spokesperson. This is just my own opinion and my own feelings with how both the game and the fandom seem to be handling the inclusion of polyamorous relationships and characters.
And in my humble opinion: Yikes !
This should be no surprise, but the polyamorous rep in bg3 isn’t … really good . It’s there, sure, and maybe I’m the fool for expecting it to be good when it really is the first time I have ever really heard of a game having an actual polyamorous option. Like on purpose. But with how much bg3 was hyped up as being super inclusive and completely different from all other games in the genre, I had hoped that it would take a good approach to polyamorous people and relationships.
Suffice to say, it fell flat once I actually looked into it.
The companions listed as open for an open/poly relationship are Astarion, Shadowheart, Minthara, and Halsin . What’s wrong with that?
3/4 of these characters already feel like they lean into the conservative fear of polyamory . Three of them are the ‘ evil ‘ members of your party . While ( besides Halsin, but we’ll get to that ) the rest of the ‘ good ‘ character are all monogamous. Growing up in a conservative home, in a conservative province, discussions of the idea of polyamory always came back to the same argument. That only the strange and amoral would do it. Only people who can’t be trusted and don’t actually care about you want to be in a polygamous relationship. And sadly, that is what I see echoed in the choices of who is and isn’t polyamorous.
I romanced Wyll in my first playthru. I had always planned to romance Wyll, actually, since I first saw his design when I first learned of bg3 during its early access days. When I met Halsin next, and chose the options to flirt with him, I thought that a polyamorous relationship between my Tav, Wyll, and Halsin would be cute. I had hoped it would work. I had already seen plenty of Astarion and Halsin and Tav art and gifsets and every other piece of fan content floating around . I had hoped that maybe that bit I read about who is and isn’t open for polyamory was outdated, and I could have this relationship play out in my little playthru .
Of course, it came down to having to choose. And I shrugged it off, at first. Sure, Larian didn’t make Wyll polyamorous for whatever reason. It is the first game that has polyamorous options, and I can just continue the game but have that polyamorous relationship in my head as my canon for my character. That’s fine, that’s what I’ve done before. It can’t be different now, right?
But then, I looked online, opened Tumblr, wondering what other people would say. Not thinking that it would be a big debate about if it is or is not okay to pair certain characters in an ot3 or not.
Wyll can’t be polyamorous, because knightly tales of courting and the mere act of courting is strictly monogamous. Pairing him in an polyamorous relationship is fundamentally misunderstanding the character and you’ve missed the point of him if you do that. It’s wrong to want that, wrong to think about it. The game has polyamorous options, be happy with what you have.
And so, I felt guilty. Larian already set up this dichotomy between their good leaning characters having the normal and good monogamous relationship and the evil leaning characters having the strange and perverse polyamorous relationship. But then, to see that the mere act of pairing your own character with two characters because you think it’s cute, is now being looked down upon so heavily and being seen as a “ fundamental misunderstanding of the characters “. And to have those ideas an opinions suddenly become the most agreed and accepted stance on the topic? How was I supposed to feel anything other than shame. Like I had been enjoying the game wrong, in a backward way.
If Wyll was polyamorous, you do know his approach to love wouldn’t change, right? Same with Gale. Same with Karlach. Same with Lae’zel. None of them would suddenly have to have completely different approaches to love and how they want to show it and how they want to go about it. Wyll can still be replicating the courting, the dancing, the slow burn that he always heard about in bards tales and he could still be polyamorous. There’s this idea that polyamorous love is only able to be expressed in very specific, very narrow ways. That miss the point of what love is.
People don’t act like this with the polyamorous companions, I’ve noticed. You aren’t suddenly bad and misunderstanding the story of Astarion or Shadowheart or Minthara or Halsin for having a strict two person relationship with them, and not expanding into the idea of those characters taking on another partner at some point. If you have Astarion in a strict monogamous relationship, no one says anything. But saying that you have a Tav who’s dating both Karlach and Gale? People are going to talk about you. They’re going to make vague posts. They’re going to talk about how it is Impossible for those characters to Ever be comfortable in a polyamorous relationship and how it is Wrong to protray them as happy in one.
I didn’t think people forgot that the stereotype of monogamy = good and polyamory = bad is still alive and well, but it seems that when it comes to the funny dungeons and dragons video game, it’s okay to prop that stereotype up and get mad when that is possibly challenged.
Now, what about Halsin? He’s a strictly good companion. He cannot fall under the pervious argument, so is he an exception?
No. It’s worse.
Halsin being polyamorous stems in racism. Wood Elves are all described as being polyamorous, and that they do not understand jealousy. And that they do not ever settle with any of their partners. And that the relationships they have are seen as “ doomed to fail “ . This is a stereotype. Commonly associated with indigenous people. That we cannot hold a ‘ proper ‘ relationship and that we always sleep around . We didn’t fit the white model of what a (white) family and a (white) relationship should look like, so the stereotypes and misconceptions started. And, unsurprisingly, ended up as another bit of dnd racism and bioessentialism.
Halsin doesn’t uphold the pervious argument at all, but he shows another part of the discussion that I don’ t think anyone really thought of. The racism stereotypes didn’t vanish when Larian made BG3, they’re all still there. You still have good races and evil races. You still have all the dnd bioessentialism that everyone was so keen to say was gone or just pretended it wasn’t there anymore.
And Halsin is an example of those stereotypes that people are still feeding. So much content with him in it narrows him down to ‘ Big Elf that Fucks and is Horny ‘ or ‘ Big Elf that can be Sexualized no matter What he Does ‘ and it is because Larian didn’t remove the stereotypes in the first place , and fandom doesn’t care enough to take a step back for a second to realize they’re playing into them.
Am I saying you shouldn’t have an ingame polycule with the characters available? No. If it’s cute, and you like it , and it makes sense with the story you’re making for your character, and literally just because you can, go for it! But for the love of god, can we be a bit more careful with how we treat the concept of polyamorous relationships and how we talk about them? Polyamory isn’t just a fandom thing with your ot3s, it’s a real life thing. And we can see how you treat people just having fun with their characters. You understand that, once you get that torn up over the act of making three characters hold hands, it becomes a little bit hard to forget that that is the attitude you hold towards the concept of polyamory when it doesn’t fit the molds you’ve subscribed to.
#bg3#bg3 critical#👍 I decided it was for the better that I rewrite this whole thing#because I was mean in the original draft#if I see any shipping discourse on this post it is over for me#long post
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Okay. Let's talk Jamie and Roy getting beers and being idiots.
I know we are all still processing that whirlwind of a finale. I'm understanding that a lot of people hate the Roy & Jamie scene because it is 1) backslide-y (true) 2) they treat Keeley like a prize to be won (true) and 3) it's OOC (I actually disagree with this one, but I can understand why it's complicated). I want to start off by saying I completely see where this opinion is coming from and I respect everyone who just hates the scene because it shows normally kind characters being very unkind to each other etc. This is less me arguing against that as it is me trying to articulate (at great length, sorry) why it not only worked for me, but I genuinely liked it.
I like to think I strike a balance between loving everything the show has done and hating overwhelmingly on a show I claim to enjoy, but sure, you could definitely argue that I'm just giving my favorite characters the benefit of the doubt, or making excuses for them, because they're my favorite characters. I'll admit I'm historically very forgiving of all the main characters' many fuck-ups on Ted Lasso, but that's because I think the show works best when it emphasizes how kindness, forgiveness, friendship and love can still operate between imperfect, flawed people. I like seeing them make realistic mistakes much more than I like everyone handling everything perfectly, I'll bite.
So, back to Jamie and Roy. I enjoyed their finale plot because despite them making a world of mistakes, the regression felt very, very human. I don't agree at all with the take that this somehow erased all the progress they've made this season or the friendship the show has lovingly crafted between them. In fact, I think this actively reiterated it! (Note: I am operating with my ot3 goggles on at all times, so I'm going to write this with that at least partially in mind, but I think the gist of it works even if you ignore the bits that get a little shippy.)
For both Jamie and Roy, Keeley and their love for her is a major beacon guiding them. I think that is the crisp, clear thing in both of their heads this episode: Keeley is the love of my life. And they both believe that wholeheartedly, and they both want to be with her. (and it's goofy to pretend this came out of nowhere for Jamie/since when is Jamie still in love with her/etc. because he literally told her and us this last season and nothing that has happened since has indicated otherwise, btw.) But there's also something else now, which is their relationship with each other, battling with their Keeley thoughts. It's like, in Roy's head, for instance, I imagine there are two wolves: on the one hand he loves Keeley, and wants to be with her, and plans to win back her heart. On the other hand, there's his love and care for Jamie Tartt, which is much less defined and inarticulate and maybe still a little repressed, but just as overpowering. His love for Keeley feels so simple and clear in comparison, while his love for Jamie is something complicated and unsure, and in this episode, he's leaning hard into the first to avoid unpacking the second.
So Roy starts off strong. He sees Jamie with Keeley in the hallway and he doesn't flip out!! Instead, he approaches Jamie calmly, and invites him out for beers. Think about how different this is from his reaction to Jamie's love confession to Keeley in season 2. This is Roy's growth in action, and it's a resounding sign of just how important Jamie is to Roy now. Even when he is feeling jealous of the woman he loves potentially leaving him behind for a man he loves (a completely natural reaction, let's be so real, if not a "good" one), he also knows that for as much as he wants to be with Keeley, he doesn't want to lose his friendship with Jamie.
As for Jamie, I know some people took his reaction and subsequent response to Nate's question as like, shock at the realization that he and Roy are actually friends now, which I agree is something that had to have come earlier in the timeline (what was Mom City if not that) and would seem very out of place at this point. What I saw it as instead was Jamie's brain more just. sort of short-circuiting? Because: holy shit isn't this the best day ever? First Keeley agreed to go to Brazil with me and now Roy is asking me on a date for beers? this is so sound. This invite is out of place behavior from Roy even within the parameters of their friendship, because they still have a match to win and Roy has banned Jamie from beers as part of his training and despite them being close now I find it hard to believe that Roy often comes up to him right there in dressing room to ask him to grab a beer with no pretense.
Therefore, they're already walking into that bar in completely different head-spaces. Jamie isn't planning to discuss Keeley, and for Roy that is his major intention behind the evening. Jamie is nervous and downing his beer, and Roy is internally panicking, I'm imagining, over when and how to bring Keeley up. I think Roy is thinking: Well, I don't intend to stop pursuing Keeley, I genuinely don't want Jamie's feelings to be hurt when I get back together with her (and yes, it is a huge presumption for him to assume Keeley's going to eventually take him back. But I think it's also an understandable one), so I've got to tell Jamie I care about him, and that I'm going to keep going after Keeley, and he needs to be okay with that so that this won't get in the way of our friendship, which I also desperately need and am unwilling to give up. In his mind, Jamie is of course going to accept all of this, because Roy and Keeley are soulmates, which Jamie will clearly recognize deep down because it is so obvious and right and anyway, Jamie always does what Roy tells him to do (again, this is all misguided thinking. But we can see how Roy's anxious little brain that's bad at processing feelings and holding space for emotions could get himself here, can't we?).
So again, we start off strong with Roy saying he's proud of Jamie and them both thanking one another. But then Roy's blurting out nonsense about how Jamie just needs to pull himself out of the running and just let Roy be with Keeley. Which is obviously not on. And Jamie responds, simply, with No. I'd argue this is also a huge step for Jamie. Jamie really doesn't tell Roy no anymore, he doesn't tell anyone no. Jamie has spent so much of his time since coming back to Richmond working to be the person everyone around him wants and expects him to be. This is him fighting for something he wants for once, doing what is best for him. It was a fabulous progression to see. In the moment, boy does it work Roy up, because why is Jamie not agreeing with me, Jamie always agrees with me? but obviously at this point, Jamie is in the right. His relationship with Keeley was no less meaningful than Roy's just because Roy says it was, Roy doesn't have any claim on her, and there's no real reason Jamie should not try and shoot his shot with Keeley if Roy is going to do the same.
Here's where things start to spiral. Established flaws we know about Roy: he's competitive. He's bad at voicing his feelings productively. And he is territorial about the people he loves, a category that safely includes both Jamie and Keeley at this point in time, for better and sometimes worse. Yes, his next actions are grossly possessive over Keeley, yes Roy has made a lot of effort over the past year to do and be better than that, to break free of that cycle. But look, it's not a linear process. He's going to still mess up, and he does here. In fact he's downright mean, weaponizing Keeley against Jamie and throwing having sex with Keeley a month ago into Jamie's face, bragging about it, boasting. Same old cycle, same old patterns of ego-driven, prideful mistakes.
Which promptly prompts Jamie to also fuck up by bringing up the leak. It's a concentrated response intended to get a suitable rise out of Roy, because Roy has really, genuinely hurt him here, and Jamie knows bringing up that video is the one thing that will hurt Roy just as much in turn. It's not the right thing to do, obviously, but again, it's such a human thing to do. Hurt the person who's hurt you right back, even if you're hurting someone else (Keeley) by extension. Mind you, Jamie came here expecting a hangout (/date) with Roy over a rare beer, and instead he got Roy being a complete asshole and lecturing nonsense at him out of seemingly nowhere. He reacts to this change-up, well, not greatly. There is something so messy and emotionally complicated happening here and it hinges on how very much Jamie and Roy care about each other, not negates it.
Keeley, queen that she is, rejects them both out of hand and kicks them out not the curb immediately because they're both being complete idiots, acting like they're so gracious in giving her the honor and privilege of choosing between them. Not to mention they've clearly got something going on between them they haven't worked through and that sure as shit isn't her problem, is it? Keeley (presumably, and I wish we had seen this) calls them out their shit and tosses them right back out the door.
Which leaves Jamie and Roy to lament how they've let their egos get away from them, they've been idiots (which they acknowledge immediately) and decide that now they should go for kebabs, presumably to actually hangout this time, not to interrupt themselves with inflated talk about who "deserves" Keeley more. They both screwed up, they acknowledge it, and all they can do is try again tomorrow, and in the meantime, go on that kebab date.
I guess....I can just see where both of them are coming from? it's not mature behavior, obviously, it's maybe not what we would have liked to have seen from them in the finale episode of the show. But it was regression that I didn't feel impeded their overall progress. Roy in particular was being a complete dick about it, but that's why the very next morning he's finally knocking on the Diamond Dogs' door. And honestly, that conversation was heartbreaking. When Roy admitted he'd expected, after a year of putting in the work, to be a whole new person...god. This is a man who still completely hates himself, to the point where he can't quite grasp that he can be better where he's at now, that he doesn't have to transform magically into someone new in order to do right by himself and others. And so he has to consciously determine, once again, to do better, be better.
The message is: change isn't linear, you're going to fuck-up, and fall back into old patterns. What matters is trying every day to do better together, and be better for one another, than you were the day before. That is the meeting point all three sides of the royjamiekeeley triangle were heading towards by the end of the episode.
So yes, it was rushed, because no one gets much screen time in a finale (and the overarching issue with this season anyway is god awful pacing. The last three episodes could've easily been the second half of the season, while the first half of the season was stretched out and largely extraneous). And yes, I would've liked a more thoughtful follow-up conversation between Roy and Keeley or all three of them. My biggest issue was that we didn't get to hear Keeley's voice hardly at all. I would at the very least have liked to have seen her setting them straight at her kitchen table, because turning both of them down signifies very important growth in her, too, and I would've liked exploring that more explicitly. So it wasn't perfect. But I still liked it, I really did.
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Sven/Gérard/Yvette; almost home
Another of the Kickstarter fills, for a request for some OG OT3.
“You know,” Blair says. “As a single dude, when your friends start getting married and have kids, usually you start to drift apart.”
Sven blinks at him, feeling slow, as he so often has lately. Blair’s speaking to him, but obviously he’s the married friend with kids in this equation, in which case the single dude is — ah.
“I don’t think we’ve drifted apart,” Sven says, looking over at Gérard. Gérard smiles back, small.
He doesn’t think they’ve drifted apart at all.
“Well, no, you’ve done the exact opposite,” Blair says. “That’s kind of my point.”
“I don’t understand what your point is meant to be,” Sven says.
“Leo?” Blair says. “You want to do that English to Olsen translation for me?”
Gérard smiles again. It looks tired. Sven sympathizes. Empathizes. Whatever the word is.
Usually he’s much better at this, but he hasn’t had an undisturbed night of sleep since little Gerard was born. Well, except on the road, but that’s exhausting in its own way — his first night away from Yvette and the baby, he spent half the night texting her for updates until she told him to sleep so at least someone would.
Sven is a champion sleeper. He’s renowned for it. Or, he was. He misses it. Sleeping in. Lazy mornings in bed. Napping just for the pleasure of it, rather than because it’s the only sleep he can snatch. He knew what he was giving up, but — well, he didn’t know.
“Too tired for translation,” Gérard says.
“Me or you?” Sven asks.
“Both, probably,” Gérard says.
“Okay,” Blair says. “Uh, usually people, you know, quit having shit in common? Instead of uh, literally moving in so they can help take care of the baby? Typically?”
“Well,” Sven says. “Have they considered it? Because I do have to say, it’s significantly easier to handle childcare when you outnumber the baby three to one.”
“Neither of you look like it’s even remotely easy,” Blair says. “Did you sleep at all last night, Cap?”
“I slept six hours,” Sven says. They weren’t all consecutive, but even so, he thinks those are solid numbers for a newborn. “As did Yvette.”
Hers were consecutive, thanks to an eye mask, ear plugs, and a noise machine. He can’t begrudge her any of it; she’s the one at home taking care of little Gerard while they’re here enduring their teammates’ busybodying because the coaching staff is running late. And not just one or two, but all of them. Sven would like to think that implies something scandalous, but most likely they’re in a meeting. He’s glad they don’t have meetings. He doesn’t think he could handle meetings on six hours of sleep. Frankly he doesn’t think he could handle meetings on eight.
Or perhaps they’ve all been fired. Sven hopes that isn’t the case. He likes them, but more importantly, he thinks if he had to adjust strategies right now he might malfunction. He’s learning something new every minute, it feels like. There is no room in his brain.
“That seems like a lot for a baby?” Bowie says. “Sleep,” he adds, when Sven blinks at him. He’s lost the thread again.
“Oh,” Sven says. “Yes. That’s my point.”
“Wait,” Dan says. “How many did Gérard sleep?”
“Seven,” Gérard yawns. His were also not consecutive. He’s an unfortunately light sleeper. He’s managed to adjust on the road, so Sven hopes he’ll be able to adjust to the baby too, but it hasn’t happened yet. But it’s only been a month. It feels much, much longer than that.
“Okay,” Scott says, leaning in, his eyes a little wild. His wife’s due any day, so Sven isn’t surprised. “I don’t know if my wife would agree, but you know what? For six hours of sleep, I’m in. Gérard, what do you charge?”
“You have to name your child after him,” Cary says. “Obviously.”
“I would genuinely consider doing that,” Scott says.
“Aren’t you guys having a girl?” Bowie asks.
“Gerardina,” Scott says. “What do you say, G?”
“That sounds like an STD,” Cary says. “You’d do that to your poor kid?”
“For six hours of sleep a night?” Scott says. “Absolutely.”
“Too bad,” Sven says, reaching a hand out. Gérard’s sitting too far away for him to reach, so he lets his hand hover in the air, hoping Gérard knows that Sven’s wrapped a telepathic arm around his shoulders. He might. Gérard is an exceptional individual. “He’s mine.”
“My wife’s a good cook,” Scott says. “Those two don’t cook, do they?”
Sven stands up, walking over to Gérard’s stall so he can not so telepathically wrap a possessive arm around his shoulders. Gérard leans back into him.
“I cook,” Gérard says.
“Free meals, and I’ll name two kids after you,” Scott says. “First name, middle name, everything.”
Sven tightens his grip.
“I don’t think Sven would be willing to give me up,” Gérard says.
Sven’s glad he knows this.
The coaching staff come in then — not fired en masse, Sven is thankful to see — and everyone jumps up, the few who haven’t changed into their gear hurriedly devoting themselves to the task.
Practice is harder than usual, but easier than conversation. There’s muscle memory to it, the literal practice of hockey, broken down into its bare components. Conversation flows, it changes, he has to adapt. That’s true of hockey too, but moreso during games than in practice. He’s only scored two goals in the past six weeks, but practice, that he can do. It’s almost nice, getting to use his body, to know that everything’s still there, that it still knows what to do, especially after he found his phone in the fridge this morning. He hadn’t even realised it was missing.
“I’ve never been more popular in my life,” Gérard says on the drive back. Sven isn’t a fan of driving at the best of times, so they’ve mutually agreed Gérard should be the one behind the wheel. “Everybody wants to name their kid after me.”
Sven grunts.
“Don’t worry,” Gérard says. “I won’t take Scottie up on his offer. I know you wouldn’t know what to do without me.”
Yvette might — she’s very capable, far more comfortable with everything. She’s tired, but not totally at sea. But Sven?
“I wouldn’t have the first idea,” Sven says honestly.
“Sleep for the rest of the drive,” Gérard says.
“It’s only ten minutes,” Sven says, but he closes his eyes, and doesn’t open them again until Gérard’s gently shaking his shoulder, telling him to come inside.
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So my friend said she was gonna date the next card she pulled and that gave me the brainworms tm
OT3 obv
But what is nrc did a raffle and had a date with mc up. Who buys tickets, who tries to rig it, and when did melanoa get here
Pls chaos to the max
[Masterlist]
Hello Ladyzsgolla🌻🌺🌷
Okay, but you need to tell me what card your friend pulled and who she ended up dating 😂🫶
Please, this brought back so many memories of the times where this type of trope would pop up in books and shoujo romances. The chaos is always always hilarious as it is and then we add in the diasomnia crew? NRC can’t catch a break.
The only way YN ended up in the auction is because Crowley somehow tricked them or set them up because I doubt certain people would let it happen.
At one point, I think diasomnia squad would be, “Want a date with YN? Fight me.”
You sighed as you stared at the chaos in front of you. You don’t know how you ended up in this situation, but you were sure Crowley had something to do with it.
Unsurprisingly, Sam and Fellow Honest had convinced the headmaster about having a festival to raise school funds. Azul had also supported the idea for monetary gain and knew what buttons to push.
But a date auction? With you? You wondered who came up with that daring idea.
Honestly, you were surprised at the amount of people trying to win a date with you, especially given your connections and your relationship status.
Though you wouldn’t be surprised if some didn’t know or were using this opportunity to get info about others. You were pretty sure some were doing it just for shits and giggles too.
Well you weren’t worried, at this point, the bets mostly came down to your friends and family having a higher chance of winning.
…you wondered if you can get a participation fee, after all, you were the main prize and you should be able to get some of that money.
You didn’t need it of course, but you wanted to see certain capitalists suffer.
Lilia: You think you can win against me? I have centuries worth of madol.
Meleanor: You mean the money that I paid you? I can freeze your accounts. That prized date will be mine.
Lilia: Meleanor! When did you get here! Stay out of this!
Meleanor: Do you know me at all?
Malleus: I do have some money saved. I can take YN on a gargoyle exploration. It’s been a while since I last had a stroll with them.
Dawn: …I do have money set aside during my days as a commander. The interest on it should have reached a sizable fund.
Levan: The steward is going to cry again.
The riggers:
Sam, Azul, and Fellow are going to figure out a way to sell more tickets despite the odds against others. I wouldn’t be surprised if certain charms and even magic was used.
Other Betters:
Floyd and Jade: I can see them getting just to make the pool larger lol
Rook: He might find this type of challenge fun, especially with such a prize. He also has the money for it.
Idia: it depends how close you are with him and the date he would like honestly. He might just not do it because of the potential headache.
Leona: literally just to mess with diasomnia.
Kalim: he is having fun and thinks it’s going to a good cause. Jamil has to stop him of course at one point.
That poor steward/accountant of Briar Valley 🫡🤣
#answered#🌺Ladyzsgolla🌺#twst knight of dawn#twst knight of dawn x reader#twst knight of dawn x reader x lilia vanrouge#lilia vanrouge x reader#the knight of dawn#lilia vanrouge#meleanor draconia#levan draconia#general lilia vanrouge
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i know you aren't really into marcille/laios any longer, but since you went looking online for dungeon meshi doujins, did you happen to find any other marcille/laios ones? (funnily enough at the convention i was at a couple weeks back they had like five, but they were extremely over-exaggerated and personally i prefer my fan content relatively in character...)
Ok first of all: Yeah listen laimar doesn’t have a grip on me anymore but I still quite enjoy it! Just more passively… Altho I do have an analysis that focuses a lot on the importance they hold to each other in my early stage wips drafts, and listen in canon I do think they’re queerplatonic flavored, call me an ot3 qpr truther because Laios Marcille and Falin have a something going on and it transcends being put into a box. But hey hey I reblog laimar artworks I bought that recent doujin I put laimar fics in my -checks- 106 pages long to-read list… Also I have like 5 pages of fanfic prompts for them I may or may not get to writing. Though yeah I do feel bad whenever I notice people following after liking all my laimar posts haha
Sadly to get to the meat of the topic, not really… I don’t go to cons for lack of opportunity so whatever I find is through online. The one I got is The Fourth Basement Floor, it has an english ver and seems so so very in character I can’t wait to get it! Otherwise I’ve looked on Otakurepublic & Doujinrepublic since I use their services for merch from Japan, warning if you click on the link, there are 18+ ones and covers can be pretty explicit. I don’t remember any other laimar one except the one nsfw one I think, but on the plus side there are a lot of gen no ships doujins. I’m bothered because looking back I feel like the catalogue of doujins was wider when I looked all those months ago and it feels like I’m forgetting something hmm… I wish I could help more, but yeah 😔 Pixiv has many laimar comics up (in japanese) if that sates the hunger any
As consolation since I’m already here, why not show some of my laimar things laying around gathering dust I’m fond of. Don’t look if you don’t want to be spoiled for fics I may or may not write I guess? All down below is just laimar prompts
I spoke about some various ones and esp my timeline where she gets him into Daltian Clan here. "Laios… I was wondering, because you enjoy fantasy stories right? I was wondering if you’d like to give my favorite book series a go… It has monsters!" I love love love post-canon laimar where he gets the habit of chewing on her hair because he’s stimming and hungry. Like a goat.
Laios goes to Marcille for love advice. "You like someone?! Do I know them?" She eagerly asked. "Erm… Yes…?" // Post-canon. He’s so nervous and puts his foot in his mouth n lets things slip out that he thought would give him away. (Comic) "You like someone??! What are they like? Who are they?" And he’s like "Well… She’s a half-elf." He’s like shit she’ll probably know right away. And she goes still. "I’ve never met another half-elf!! We’re so rare! You’re saying you met one and didn’t tell me???!" She’s shaking him. And then she goes still again, contempt drawing on her face. "Wait… Are you asking me for advice because I’m a half-elf?" Laios runs with it "Yes!! And because you’re so savvy with romance and what people like…? If, uh, if you were a half-elf, what would you like to get as a gift? What sort of confession would you want?" "… You saved it there. Okay so since I’m so knowledgeable on romance, tell me what is she like?" "-describes Marcille-" She nods, smug yet oblivious. "Aah I can already tell we’d be great friends. Good taste." (then Thinking bubble with him giving her flowers at a restaurant "Did you know roses are edible and used in recipes", candlelit dinner, or wait maybe the most romantic is cooking together alone at home, chocolate! It’s expensive though… Wait I’m king now!)
Lil comic, Laios wakes up snuggled against Marcille’s back then promptly falls off the bed. The noise makes Marcille wake up and she’s like omg are u ok?? Laios is so sweaty and panicked and in denial about her being special to him. She explains, disgruntled at the memory "Izutsumi is bunking in with Chilchuck again, they’re taking the whole bedrolls." Pause. "Sorry, I should have told you, but you like sleeping with Izutsumi too so I figured…" She looked sheepish. "Between you and Senshi, I much prefer sleeping with you. It feels sort of nostalgic, like a sleepover, no?" He relaxes and gets in the bed again, smiling. "But… We’ve never had a sleepover?" She chuckles "I guess not. I must be getting that impression because of Falin…" And the air between them is warm yet bittersweet now, as she smiles like that and his eyes and smile cloud over. The earlier instinctive reluctance to touch is gone now. She snuggles into his arms and is like "Hug me?" "Okay." And he does, wraps his arms around her and tucks his chin over her head.
Post canon, marcille takes him to a squid restaurant. Cute lighthearted hehe. He sulks "If there are any parasites in this I will ban squid from this kingdom or so help me…"
Short post canon fluff marcille pov about laios gaining weight n becoming chubby. She used to dream of chiseled abs and angular elves, laios in every way, shape and form is so far from the beauty standards she idealized so. And yet… She loves how soft sleeping against him is, how much there’s more of him for her to hug and nuzzle her face in. She loves seeing him and seeing someone strong, who isn’t malnourished or underweight, someone healthy with color in their skin. An healthy appetite. He used to look more like a rectangle, severe and strict, but now he looked rounder, and seeing him smile at her always made her feel like that roundness suited him. She smiled back, and melted thinking about how her boyfriend was the sweetest in the world. ^I still wanna do this one really bad. Sometimes a fic premise comes from nowhere and puts you in a chokehold and you must finish it to obtain catharsis
Short oneshot about laios musing about Marcille’s smile, how important it is to him in subtle ways etc: Ends with Laios being like wait there’s something off (succubus). Then he grabbed her throat. Or smth
Laios seeing her dungeon like "this is so wrong Marcille you can’t run a dungeon for shit" and also "WHAT ARE THESE HORRORS OF MONSTERS NOO THEY CAN’T BE EFFECTIVE LIKE THAT"
Dinner for two: Very warm. Marcille and Laios are meeting up and cooking a dinner just for them both, no one else is there. They’re being so domestic and it’s light. Laios pauses at some point, doing the dishes, saying… I’ve always worried, thinking doing things like these would remind me of my parents.
Laios doesn’t know what to do when he realizes he actually *likes* likes Marcille, so he avoids her. Everyone notices and is disapproving of him.
Her mana acts up and she shares her dream with someone, kinda like with Izutsumi. Listen the premise could be smutty but I think it’d be more fun if they just hanged out n were silly, like the nightmares chapter without the nightmare
Laimar pining but from the view of Chilchuck, his love hatred sensing a storm brewing. The giggling, the looks. Ugh! It reminded him of himself and his wife when they were young and newly dating.
I love Laios and Izu being worsties so. Laios sees izutsumi rubbing her scent on marcille’s clothes and gets possessive. Maybe Golden Kingdom maybe something else I have no clue but Laios being ridiculous and cheek rubbing or something <3
I might want to do an AU where Laios gets into werebeast ring fighting, before canon and the split happens after he deserts the military. So he’s alone, has nothing going for him and stumbles into that sphere and gets werebeast tattoos done. It doesn’t make him happier at all and fighting sucks actually, but it brings money and he likes being a beast and being cheered by a crowd aka illusion of being liked, and money brings food and eating is the privilege of the living etc etc. So then when he goes to check on Falin at the academy it’s a big AU where he has a whole other reputation and look to him, and when he meets izutsumi their relationship is different and aaaaaa… He’s freeer in this au, lets himself be animalistic and weird, even though ofc the arc is him letting himself be more human as well and connecting with humans, through talking and infodumping n shit. Oh I went off but the laimar is because it’s inspired by cool laimar art here (warning tho it’s an art dump with toudencest also 😔) but werewolf Laios laimar AUs… A lotta fun stuff there idk idk
#Laimar#ask#Ppl can send me laimar asks tbh idk when i’d get to them but i do still love them#Not all that much left i wanna explore analysis or post wise with them though#Laios touden#marcille donato#Fanfic wips#Dungeon meshi#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers
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GR RPF FIC REC MASTERLIST!!
Long post!
Big shoutout to @arsenalgbt for suggesting i made a list, here are my fave GR fics, im a multishipper so it will be a couple or ships here, anyway, enjoy!
I wanted to also thank all the authors here listed for their awesome contributions to this lovely fandom, im really grateful for all your work <3333333
If any of the authors here listed would rather have their work taken down from this list please let me know .
new year's resolution by @wormeo-and-juliette
Pairing: OT3 Fernando Alonso/George Russell/Lance Stroll
Lance gets the text from Fernando well into the afternoon on the first day of the year: I slept with George.
Um. What?
eagle eyed by @prettydangrotten
Pairing: OT3 Alex Albon/George Russell/Logan Sargeant
“He’s watching, you know,” Alex says, voice level and conversational, like Logan being in the room is a normal part of this experience, “he’s hard.”
i’m your number one (it’s so obvious) by @63historian
Pairing: OT3 Lewis Hamilton/George Russell/Max Verstappen
“Tell him what you want, Georgie.”
He clenches his hole just as he starts begging, “I need you to come inside me, please, Max, please, I want it so bad.”
And who is Max not to obey such beautiful cries?
positive negatives by @ctimenefic
Pairing: Alex Albon/ George Russell
George doesn’t regret that shoot, exactly.
He had for a long time. After the first high of seeing the rushes wore off; after overhearing a murmured warning in general casting, days too late; after he woke up at three am to reread the release he’d blithely signed without thinking, and spent the next four hours staring at the ceiling hoping to wake up. He’d regretted it then.
For years after, the memory of it could hit like an ice cube sliding down his spine. Always, of course, at the most inconvenient moments. When he was working, or networking, when he needed his wits about him, couldn’t afford to stutter over his words. They’d put him in white silk, or offer him wine, or he’d walk into a room with slow, warm jazz playing, and the whole excruciating mess of it all would come back. He’d learnt how to smile through it, then how not to blink at all.
June is the coldest month of the year by @beabnormal24
Pairing: Max Verstappen/ George Russell
“Just don’t be a stranger, yeah?” It doesn’t sound as empty as George would’ve expected.
Max disappears in Monaco’s breeze with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his jacket and his head turned to the side to look at the coast following him, or it’s him who follows the coast. It’s not that simple to guess when George feels the way he does about him.
He stares at the broad expanse of his back until he’s nothing more than a distant figure just like any other person around and he can pretend that he’s no one in the middle of the world.
The blessing of anonymity, he muses, gripping at the hems of his sleeves.
All of a sudden, his chest feels quiet.
nobody else by ginnydear
Pairing: Alex Albon/ George Russell
The Mercedes garage is almost overwhelmingly busy when Alex walks through the crowds of officials there.
or... what if the world was suddenly plunged into omegaverse and everyone started presenting at once... pt two.
table in the back by @janinaduszejko
Pairing: Alex Albon/ George Russell
“Okay, here’s the offer." Alex says. "I’m going to make you something and if you don’t like it, you don’t pay. How does that sound?”
“So I get a good meal or a free meal?” George asks. “Sounds like a no-lose scenario.”
“Keen eye, George,” Alex grins. “Figured out my terrible business sense on the first try. Alright, take it or leave it.”
all green lights
Pairing: Alex Albon/ George Russell
Sorry mate I think you've got the wrong number
chrome wheeled, fuel injected, and steppin' out over the line
Pairing: OT3 George Russell/Lance Stroll/Fernando Alonso
Lance and Fernando have been together for over two years and it is great. It is great apart from one minor detail. They are both dominant tops and the irritation is starting to grind them down. Enter Lance's ex-whatever, George Russell.
But George is not going to be as easy to get on board as Lance and Fernando think. He will give his whole heart but you have to open it up first.
DISCLAIMER: THE FIC IS NOW ON PERMANENT HIATUS
Very common crisis (series) by crimandclove
Pairing: George Russell/ Lance Stroll
January 2024 - George finds himself single, stressed, with a set of tits & one Lance Stroll in his home.
Calls and Cats by @raewritesf1
Pairing: George Russell/Max Verstappen
Things go awry when George’s video call with the quartet is interrupted by the form of a familiar half-naked Dutch driver wielding a Bengal cat in the background.
spread before you like a picnic by @janinaduszejko
Pairing: Alex Albon/ George Russell
Now, weeks later, he thinks that was probably the reason he’d said it, why when he came back to himself and noticed that Alex had manhandled him on his stomach and was in the process of peeling George’s jeans down, his first instinct was to say, panicky: “You can’t fuck me.”
it's not about having someone to love me anymore by linearity
Pairings: Alexander Albon/George Russell, George Russell/Toto wolff
George is an omega. He kind of hates himself for it.
Brake Balance by @russilton
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton/George Russell
"Why don’t you come dance?” With me goes unspoken, and George is eyeing him with a familiar look, like he’s sure Lewis will brush him off again, but he still wants to try.
Maybe it’s the buzz of alcohol. Maybe it’s the shiny skin of a tanned collarbone showing through George’s three open shirt buttons. Maybe it’s just the adrenaline of the whole day in general, but for once, Lewis thinks that sounds like a pretty good idea.
Stop overthinking, just go with it.
Bono’s words echo pointedly around his mind. Fuck it
ode to a conversation stuck in your throat by @prettydangrotten
Pairing: Alex Albon/George Russell
They’d agreed on friends when Alex had come to collect the last of his things from George’s flat. George had been adamant about it, all uncomplicated smiles, like they hadn’t just spent six months living in each other’s pockets and having some of the most bizarrely intimate sex of Alex’s life.
And friends is a noble intention, but. Alex still only has one friend who’s sucked him off in their driver’s room.
Allow yourself this happiness by Sonnenscheintraum
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton/George Russell
i can barely breathe (when you're here loving me)
When Lewis wakes up he knows he's going into rut. He will be able to get through the rainy and cold race in Spa if he takes enough suppressants.
But what if George by his side is actually making it worse for him to keep the rut in check?
How is he supposed to keep himself under control when George looks and smells like the most delicious way and makes him want to claim him?
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton/George Russell
Lewis Hamilton may be the sweetest person who ever stepped on earth and choose not to see the truth, but he deserves so much more than a broken, thirteen years younger college student.
So George does what is best for him.
See my Vision (tell ‘em) by @russilton
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton/George Russell
“Feeling a little desperate, sweetheart?” It’s clearly rhetorical, but George nods anyway, and bites his lip at the conflicted emotions he sees cross Lewis’ face.
He knows it’s late, closer to Monday morning than Sunday night, but it’s been so long since they’ve had freedom to do whatever they want. He loves racing with his entirety, he even loves the intensive training and strict schedules, but he doesn’t love how the need to keep his body in perfect function for a race keeps him from Lewis.
George and Lewis have three weeks break between Monza and Singapore, and they just can’t wait anymore.
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time for the obligatory post about what episodes I want to see in the upcoming leverage season(s)
(for reference, I made this similar post in 2020 after the reboot was announced. I'm pasting some from that post bc I still want them to happen lol)
new ideas:
I mentioned a date night episode in the last post (apollo really did bless me with foresight for the date night job on that one) but for considerment: ot3 date night. possibly their first date night after they all get together. breanna and sophie know it's happening (harry is, like, peripherally aware) and some crime hijinks are going down and the three of them are frantically trying to stop bad things from happening that are going to interfere with the date. I want to see them going through it behind the metaphorical curtain. I want to see breanna fighting for her life trying to out-hack the hacker that is going to ruin their ten-part itineraried date. harry has to get in a fistfight and eliot is so proud about it when he finds out after everything is over
tree law episode. harry has been frothing at the mouth about it since it was made. his life has been moving him towards this penultimate moment. breanna thinks it's HILARIOUS and cheers him on 100% of the way. she is VERY enthusiastic about this con
I'm not going to mention certain things because I've seen jrogers posting on bluesky social and I know he might be already writing some of those plots
con that the food trucks have plot-relevance. like, one of his food truck stations is being harassed /victimized by, like, a local gang or something that takes advantage of food truck/cart workers and the team steps in. the actual (veteran) food truck workers get involved in the con. leverage international might just have gained a few retainer members
quinn should come back for an episode. I know the actor is friends with ckane. they should make it happen because it would be iconic and I said so
on a similar note, ckane is friends with jensen ackles and. guys. wouldn't it- wouldn't it be extremely funny if a flame from eliot's past named sean sylvester who is a rugged drifter with a questionable past
episode where tara or maggie (or BOTH, can you imagine how powerful that would be???) come back and there is slight flirting with sophie possibly??? that or very obvious chemistry from a past tryst. sophie has slept with both of them, I know it in my heart of hearts. bonus points if tara and maggie fall in love (I think it would be funny. maggie's taste in men is canonically atrocious, I think she deserves someone like tara at this point)
I just want a lot of side characters to come back, okay? sue me I miss them
gonna put the rest under the cut since this post has become obscenely long
not episode-specific, but I want more mentions of the korean leverage team. and all the other teams too! we know that in canon there is the south korean one, the nigerian one, and one in london (I think that's it for mentions so far, but correct me if I'm wrong!)
episodes addressing issues with american imperialism and its effects on minorities and marginalized communities, specifically within this country (there aren't a lot of episodes where they are actively out of country)
dear fucking god take a more abolitionist stance on policing I'm begging. would it KILL you to not be weird about cops? pls just punch some more cops. take down white supremacist cops, I'm sure you can scrounge something up bffrrn
women's rights episodes. I know it's kind of recent, but episodes about accessibility of stuff like birth control, abortion access, etc. y'all are capable of making excellent episodes on that I know it
more climate crisis-related episodes. god knows you're feeling it in the deep south
taking down a corrupt megachurch pastor (although lbr, there is no ethical megachurch anything and you can fight me on this)
something to do with ace rights bc I think it would be really cool to see the team advocate for that stuff, especially since breanna is canon ace
helping a polycule that is being victimized by X organization/entity (maybe a housing association or medical or something???). breanna is bombastic side-eyeing the ot3 the entire time. it is making hardison sweat. sophie thinks it's hilarious
taking down 'writers' that use ai and self-publish AND/OR people that take original/fan works off of like ao3 and wattpad and publish them for personal profits without the author's consent. breanna would have a field day with this (god herself could try to convince me that girl does not read/write fanfic and I wouldn't believe it)
episode about underfunded public schools. we saw corrupt private schools in the fairy godparents job but I want an episode that would make abbot elementary writers proud
episode addressing native/indigenous. eliot is from oklahoma, I'm sure he is well aware of the health/job/economic/etc disparities on reservations. I will email jrogers about it myself if I have to- it anyone can get people going about native rights through a tv show it would be leverage.
I sent an ask to wil wheaton once asking if he was open to returning to leverage and I think he said he would be down for it. but chaos either has to be a reluctant ally to leverage international and is being handled by quinn as a hitter OR he is just. in jail. bc he sucks.
bpas and/or pfas episode. breanna has mentioned microplastics before but I want more
the team tears the shit out of conversion therapy camp owners and plants the seeds for legislation that will punish parents that try to send their kids to those hellscapes
while we're at it, I'd love to see an ep where they tackle the trans bathroom issue. god knows the news doesn't talk about it nearly enough
something to do with foster care. they end up starting some sort of foster care network that past clients/allies can take part in. maybe a mentorship program for kids that want to do what they do one day (they are very reluctant to encourage kids to participate in crime BUT if that is the avenue that they are going to inevitably go towards, they guide them in the right direction). nana makes an appearance (*insert 'everybody liked that' meme*)
prison industrial complex episode. I KNOW we had the jailhouse job BUT we really need this in our year of 2024
another episode on corrupt influencers. maybe influencer parents? dear god pls take them down a notch
ep where there is an underlying message that tells you how to avoid becoming victim to scams or something, or like is a tutorial for how to identify scams you might fall victim to (sorry, I just have to say this after two separate people tried to pig butcher me in less than two (2) weeks))
not to say I want them to do an ep calling out cop city, but it would feel really good to watch the leverage team rip that concept to SHREDS
the minimum wage job. need I say more? we deserve the catharsis
pls go after goodwill execs, esp the ones in the pnw that have their sector as for-profit and have become millionaires+ because of it while paying their staff (especially disabled staff) fucking pennies
while we're on the topic, pls call out salvation army (the corporation)
I can probably go on for like five hours so I'll stop here
ep that we get to see harry and his daughter bond :)
job where they get to lower the price of insulin (and other drugs)
actually, you know what? an episode where the crew annihilates big pharma and terrible insurance companies
I think that breanna should be able to go off about mass/over consumption as a treat. I 100% believe she has Thoughts about it. like, she will absolutely call out the corporations that are responsible for these trends, but also she should be allowed to mention our tendency for overconsumption as a society. obviously there are a few corporations that are doing most of the world's pollution/ecological damage, but we should be doing our part too and I KNOW it would be in-character for her to go off on it
I bet she has a LOT to say about influencers, tbh. obviously not all influencers are bad, but there are sooooo many problematic ones and problems within the influencer industry
sizing discrimination in the modeling/clothing industry. let eliot talk about how there are no perfect bodies. also while I'm on the subject, can we PLS have more body-diverse background actors on the show? I know this is nitpicky but I'd really love to see some more people that look like me, even if they are just in the background
a thinly veiled writers' rights episode (I'm looking at you media execs and the stupid amount of time it took for you to comply to the WGA demands)
something to do with media companies making entire movies/tv shows and then fucking cancelling them/not releasing them and using them as tax write-offs. every time it happens it baffles me. that is cartoonishly stupid villain shit. I can't imagine lovingly working on a project for a year plus and then the company just going, nah, we aren't going to release it because you suck and it's a good business move
ai art and ai in general. please. let it BURN
okay now I'm done
ideas from the previous post that I still want:
comicon job. I said it before and I will say it again- we deserve it!!! come on, it's the age of the geek after all!!! (in the last post I also said a ren faire ep, but I will let the card game job count for that)
summer camp ep? I saw a tumblr fic about it and I think it could be cute. it could kinda be like the fairy godparents job- eliot in charge of some type of sports (archery, fencing, etc), hardison would be in charge of arts and crafts (this boy might be a genius with tech and in general tbh, but the show did such a good job of showing that he’s also very talented with the arts- sculpting the statue for the miracle job, forging the old diary in the king george job, etc), parker would LOVE to be in charge of a high ropes course. breanna would totally be down for some sort of nerdy kid robotics or simple, traditional camp games (can't go wrong with the classics. everyone loves making bracelets!) I feel like it's too stereotypical to have sophie have kids put on a play but we all know that's exactly what she would do. idk for harry? I think he has the same traditional camp activities vibe as breanna. he's in it for the nostalgia. OR something to do with videogames
please, please, please, please, please make an episode where they take down a cult, im begging. that would be such a good episode. definitely a mindfuck episode like the experimental job (4x11). I’ve seen a few posts about a job dealing with a cult (here’s one) and I think it would be really interesting
MORE STERLING being DONE with leverage shenanigans!!! give me feral!sterling like in the frame-up job (5x10)!!! give me sterling that protests every step of the way but conveniently looks away and “whoops, the team just disappeared, I have no idea how that happened!!! diddly dang darn it, they got away again!!! sorry guys!!!” bonus points if mcsweeten is there too and also participates in intervening hijinks
the team takes down a circus that is still using and abusing wild animals!!! because first I’d LOVE to see acrobat!parker swinging up in the air like a pro and being in her element, but also because those places are the fucking worst and need to Go Down. give me eliot having to pose as an animal trainer with deep sympathy for the animals being abused, quietly talking soothing words to them when he thinks no one is around (correction: hardison is, in fact, around, and filming his boyfriend’s softness to save for later). give me charismatic hardison playing the role of ringmaster, running and flaunting about and being passive-aggressive to the circus master. give me eliot freeing the animals from their chains when they are finally able to shut the place down and relocate the animals to sanctuaries (his hands shaking just a little as twists the key in the lock, because he too was once an abused, caged animal in his own right and he knows how liberating it is to finally be free).
#i have SO much to say about native rights and I'd give a kidney to be able to have it shown for all on a wide reaching show#for the love of god it's the least we can do#sorry yall im just. really passionate about native rights. I made myself a nuisance to all of my hs history professors talking about it#every chance i got. if the textbooks won't talk about it i will make my presentation about it and educate my peers my goddam self if i have#to#anyway. i will get off the soap box now. but yeah educate yourself on native/indigenous rights (based off where you live too)#episode ideas#leverage redemption#leverage redemption s3#speculation#mine#parker#alec hardison#eliot spencer#leverage ot3#parker x hardison x eliot#sophie devereaux#harry wilson#breanna casey#mr quinn#quinn#side characters#leverage international#tara cole#maggie collins#jim sterling#recurring characters#sophie x maggie#sophie x tara#maggie x tara
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Currently reading a Korean webnovel instead of Chinese ones and this is making me conceptualize something, let’s see if I can put it in words…
My musings started with realizing that I’ve become very used to this cnovels thing where the main pairing is literally stated in the summary. Not the case for the k-novel I’m reading, and therefore I’m experiencing Pain and Suffering, — torn between my every instinct screaming that the author is setting up the OT3 endgame, and trying to lower my expectations to avoid disappointment. (And the novel is ongoing so I can’t even get spoilers for the ending :) girl help.)
As you may’ve guessed, I found myself strongly preferring the Chinese variant; but as to why exactly it was so important for my enjoyment to know the main couple… it took me a bit to figure out.
I mean, it’s not like I’m reading exclusively for romance, okay? Fannish activity-wise, sure, I tend to get fixated on ships (though even then, not all the time), but when it comes to reading (or any media intake, really), it’s not necessarily what I’m most interested in. Among my beloved titles, there are many where there’s no canon or fanon couple I'm attached to — and more than a few where there’s a canon couple that I neither love nor hate, just accept. So why did I get so attached to the concept of being, essentially, spoiled the endgame couple beforehand?
The key word that made it click was: promise. After all, it’s not like knowing the names of the characters that get together tells me anything about if they will be interesting or boring together, if they will be good for each other or make me scream “break up!” a million times. But it is a solid promise that these two people ARE gonna be a couple.
And thinking about the word promise reminded me of discussions on plot twists that I’ve seen on here, about what makes a good plot twist and what makes a bad one — specifically, the phrase “narrative promise” that someone came up with. Basically, narrative promise is in the set up and the build up. If the plot twist betrays the narrative promise, it will not work, and it will be hated by the audience, who’ll feel like their emotional investment into the story was mocked.
The thing about the narrative promise, and why this term stuck with me, is that it’s actually applicable more broadly than just for shock-factor plot twists. For example: what is queerbaiting, if not betraying the narrative promise that the two characters are gonna be together? The fans see the narrative promise — the set up and the build up that would be unequivocally romantic for a het couple — and expect it to be fulfilled; only to be called delusional by the very creators that gave them this expectation.
And this brings me to the next point: the catch of the “narrative promise” is that it’s never a guarantee. You can be completely sure the author is setting up X, only for them to turn around and do something completely different. (Possibly while calling you a little bitch for having the stupidity to invest your feelings into their creation, too.) After a while, a fan learns to manage their expectations. To not bet too much on anything, even if it feels like there’s no other way it can go. To wait until the end of the season or the last chapter before allowing themselves to get attached; to hold back on deciding whether something is good or not, lest they hype up something they will want to bury and forget later.
And this is where we circle back to c-novels, and to spoiling the main couple in the summary. Except I hesitate to call it “spoiling” because, as discussed, it actually heightens my enjoyment. For a simple reason: this practice takes the narrative promise from its nebulous, uncertain status to something concrete and real. Only for this one aspect and with the minimal-est amount of information possible, but still. That’s one thing I don’t have to guess about or doubt myself on (am I seeing things? is there a heterosexual explanation another way to read this? will the author simply kill off one of the characters before the end so that they don’t have to decide whether to make them explicitly queer?), and one thing I can count on (whatever else happens in the plot, I’ll still have this). It’s easy to invest emotionally into those characters and their relationship, when you have an assurance of their happy ending.
Ofc, I’m not saying that I don’t invest emotionally into relationships or characters other than the main CP — just that it is easier. And I would even say having this one(1) hard promise makes it easier to invest into other elements of the work, too, as it makes for a sort of safety net even if something else is disappointing or painful.
Like, say you are invested in one couple with great chemistry and one side character. In case of a pre-stated ship, even if the side character dies, at least you still have the canon couple. So it’s not like all of your emotional connection to the book is lost, and you can probably bear with the loss of that character by writing everybody lives AU or something. But if the side character dies AND the couple you were invested in gets broken up or killed off or straight-married with other ppl… then doesn’t that make the entire thing into one massive disappointment? to the point that you might even regret picking up the book that made you care only to slap you in the face?..
So yeah, having even just one ship guaranteed is very comforting. And then I thought, well, doesn’t this apply to another type of fiction that I’m very familiar with?
Fanfiction?
Which, since very early on, has adopted the practice of putting the endgame ship in the header of the fic. And which, probably not coincidentally, is often a response to a broken (or at the very least not brought to its logical conclusion) narrative promise. And which always felt uniquely easy to read for me…
See, prior to getting on this little thought train, I always assumed the ease was due to pre-existing familiarity with canon. You know, not having to learn the entire new setting, already having attachment to the characters… But now that I’ve connected these dots, I thought about times I read fics for fandoms I wasn’t familiar with, and originals formatted as fics — and really, wasn’t it always about the narrative promise made solid?
Esp with how fics make it even broader than cnovels, by having extensive tags and ratings and such. Getting into a fic, you have a pretty clear idea of what may or may not happen in the story, even if you don’t know what exactly will happen or how. And a fic can fail to live up to the premise set up by ship/rating/tags — but not completely turn its back on it.
(Well, normally. But in those exceptional cases where tags are misleading, at least you have something to point to when saying, “this is not what I was promised”. The ficwriter can hardly claim they don't understand why you expected [ship] to happen when they personally tagged their work as containing that ship — unlike the traditional media creators, who can always play the "you were totally misunderstanding my intentions the entire time" card.)
And having a solid promise like this, it turns out, takes lotsa pressure off starting a New Unfamiliar thing. I do, in fact, trust like that! So it’s no wonder that there were periods in my life when I would only consume fanfiction, because it was so much easier than extending trust to new titles. And it’s no wonder that what brought me back to being an avid reader were Chinese webnovels that use a practice very similar to what we have in fandoms.
I guess I understand myself better now! Still wish I knew if that k-novel's author is /j or /srs about the ot3 though.
#fandom#fanfiction#cnovels#danmei novels#idk just a lot of musings that i wanted to organize a bit. and since i already typed it all might as well set it free here
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MEMES/IMAGE EDITS I'VE MADE IN THE PAST BASED ON WEIRD DREAMS I'VE HAD (CW for scorpions in one image)
this is a long-ahh post so i'll be nice and put everything under the cut.
this is one i had when i was a little kid. i was in our kitchen at night, and this giant Visa logo was chasing me around. i jumped into a crib that was randomly there for some reason, and it honed in on me just before i woke up.
this was another one i had as a little kid about a weird ending to a Barney episode. looking back, though, i think it was the Count from Sesame Street at the end and not the Hamburgular.
Barney x The Count x Hamburgular OT3 tbh. /j
okay so this one i THINK i had towards the end of 2021. i was at Disney World and there was this new walk-through attraction called "The New Naples." all it was was this dingy run-down old crackhouse and at the end there was this sentient Barney plushie with red, angry eyes and wearing a chef costume that would jump out and attack you.
this one's also from 2021. i was at Universal Studios or some other amusement park, and this was a sign outside one of the rides. i think it was some sort of bumper-car ride with spray nozzles full of colored slime that you could spray at people.
the pink tax at work smh. /hj
also from 2021. all i really remember was that this was a design on a t-shirt.
to this day JimmyTheGoat dot com does not seem to exist.
in this dream (2021 was the year of weird dreams for me lol) i had a magical TV that was inhabited by the good fairies from Sleeping Beauty, who spent all their time making movies in real-time for me to watch.
i was watching a movie in which Sleeping Beauty and Snow White fell in love and ran away together. (love wins~) this was the logo at the end. yes, the MS-paint eyes were part of it. Flora had to go and make her clothes blue for this gig and she ain't happy about it. show some respect.
guess the year. go on. guess. in this dream, this little scorpion/guinea pig hybrid was chasing me around my house. he was adorable, yes, but he was also venomous enough to kill me in one fell swoop if i'd come in contact with it.
this one's actually from 2020! yeah, i know! in this dream, Disney wanted to hop on the "My Little Pony: Pony Life" bandwagon and made their own version with the Disney Princesses. (the image source is from the Video Brinquedo mockbuster cartoon "Little Princess School.")
these last two i don't remember any context for or even what happened in the dreams they're from. i think they're just random memes i saw in my dreams. but they're worth a mention.
i think the pigeon one was one i saw just before waking from a nap.
hope you enjoyed the inner machinations of my enigmatic mind.
bye.
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Unpopular opinion: I strongly dislike the ending (Spoilers)
It seems that in the fandom a lot of people is happy or satisfied with the ending but it's not my case. I'll try to express my opinion as best as I can. But first, let me get this straight. I absolutely love the anime. It's just that the ending didn't sit right for me. For the next reasons:
I didn't like how Mytho and Rue ended up together. Allow me to elaborate: Mytho wasn't in love with her. I didn't feel or saw any moment within the anime were he expressed feelings for her. I just saw a girl heavily traumatized and in need of love of some kind who was obssesed with Mytho because she didn't feel she could be loved by anyone else.
I don't deny she loves him in a certain way. But I don't think them ending up together was a wise choice. Her love was so unhealthy and abusive towards Mytho, that it didn't make sense for me he fell in love with her. I saw people say that Mytho kinda has this Hero Complex when he wants to save everyone and takes pity on weak and fragile creatures and it definitely seems that way when he makes Rue his princess. Not because he has feelings for her, but because "Poor thing, she loves me so bad and has suffered so much :("
Rue marrying Mytho feels kinda like a "reward" for her suffering and obssesion
Rue needs friends, independence, heal from her past and the abuse, maybe come back to studying ballet, try to find her parents. Not marrying the prince whom she was always obssesed. That won't solve anything for her. I empathise with her because I also was a survivor of psychological abuse and that shit is tough. Don't get me wrong, I love Rue as a character and she deserves to be happy.
But It gives vibes of "Character who was obssesive with A-character and was abusive towards them, but look! She has an awful past and her life was a mess, so A-character will marry her just because he took pity of her" Mytho was Rue reward for her suffering and obssesion, so she can now magically be happy. I know people will disagree with me, and that's fine, but this is my honest opinion on this matter.
Fakir and Ahiru loved Mytho like no one else did
Okay, this point is my point of view as a shipper but I also think It's important. Throughout all the anime it was crystal clear for me that Fakir had feelings for Mytho, besides their Prince/Knight dinamic. Yeah he was overprotective and not very healthy over Mytho but for a good reason actually. He wanted him to be safe. And my darling Ahiru was the most selfless person ever, and they both were in love with him. I'm 100% sure. So even though I never thought my OT3 would be canon, for me they are.
There's a lot of the 'But Mytho and Ahiru love was platonic/idealized' my brother in christ, Ahiru did EVERYTHING she could and more for Mytho. That's love. Same for Fakir.
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Hi, I’m a new larrie and I believe them to be dating now and back then too, but the only things that are throwing me off are when they (mostly Harry lol) “confirm” stuff like that.
Like when Harry got asked who his first crush was and he answered Louis and when someone asked if they are dating and he says yes. Now, why that’s throwing me off is because they were/are supposed to keep it a secret, so help me out. Do you think he did that as rebellion or do you think he wanted to tell the truth, so he did, but was hoping it came across as a joke?
I personally lean towards the latter, but I’d like to hear someone else’s opinion to help me form my thoughts better. x
Hi, love. Those two moments happened so early on. When H was asked who his first crush was, he very much looked like he thought for a moment, then smiled when he said it, and was very serious when she asked how Louis felt about him. I don’t think he meant it as a joke and I don’t think he was rebelling. That moment and the Mario Kart moment were both interviewed SugarScape and both are still all over the internet, so there seems to have been some moments where the insinuation (or confirmation) of the two of them being together between 2011 and 2012 were allowed/tolerated/encouraged.
The video when he confirms that they’re dating was interesting because he looks almost exhausted and somewhat hesitant to answer the question, but still does. And when the girl says, “I told you/I thought so!” he just outright beams, as if he was expecting her to freak out or be upset, but then is so happy when she’s supportive.
There was definitely something odd going on around the time because it’s around the same time of that Much Music interview where the woman asks about Larry (starts at 16:00) and tells them about how girls like reading fic about two guys they fancy being together and you can tell how hard it is for Harry and Louis to wrap their heads around the idea. To me, it very much seems like they’d been explicitly told that, as Louis says, if someone is a Harry fan, for example, they’re not going to like the idea of Louis and Harry together. And then the journalist is like, oh that’s not true at all! You can see their little heads explode.
My basic feeling is that it’s possible the label has an inkling that Louis was gay from day one and was okay with it. But they hadn’t expected Harry to not be straight, as well. And they hadn’t expected the two to fall for each other. But there seemed to be some leniency in the early days. The closet came down hard when there was a serious push to break into the US charts—H*ylor started, Louis was “loved up” with Eleanor, and Harry and Louis barely interacted. As fans dug their heels in, the closet got worse and the narrative shifted to the homophobic “fans ruined their friendship” nonsense. That then evolved into Harry vs OT3 (ie: Harry is too good for the band) and so on.
#2011 Larry moments#2012 Larry moments#sugarscape#much music#Larry denial#Mario Kart#Harry’s first crush#are you and Louis dating?
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I really want to do my end of year sappiness post right now so I am going to do it. This year. This year, this year was the year that the fact that I made it is something I have to talk about it, because honestly I wasn’t sure between everything. And in the trauma (the activated Jewish Trauma Genre), in the hate I have also found love. Am Yisrael Chai. We live. I live.
Which is why I have to first send my love to my Jewish Mutuals/Friends and to Jumblr - @cephalopodvictorious @captainlordauditor and just, every one of my Jewish Mutuals and people who have sent kind words. Who have made me, a patrilineal mizrahi jewish woman reconnecting with her heritage and faith because of abuse feel Jewish enough to go to Synagogue.
This year was, despite everything the year I reconnected with old friends (shout to my friends in physical space - E, R, C and C), I took an art class, I swam more, I wrote a bunch of words, I found my love of art again and discovered that I might, might be good at it, I even asked for things like gifts even though it’s Terrifying.
To my saatis. My sisters. My chosen family. Thank you for everything - the phone calls you let me schedule, the chats and the wise words and the blorbos and from some of you the in person hugs (there will be more I will offer hugs to and I will also hug again). @shes-a-voodoo-child @bibliothekara @wheresonichedgehogwnt @pearlsthatwereeyes @star-anise @notabuddhist @kawuli lemonsharks @maevedarlings @ruffboijuliaburnsides @taibhsearachd @blackeyedgirl-writes @armyofthedaegiloth @strangeetudes @findingfeather
@bessemerprocess @sarking @jesidres @kshandra @amadistuff FRIENDS. FRIENDS. Love you to the moon and back - and we are here. We are here.
And @geeoharee - The Sherlock Content <3.
To the Pocket Friends Who Have/Are Becoming(If It’s okay obviously!) Become Friends: @rahabs whose kindness I will never ever forget. To @theladyelizabeth who patiently answers my questions about all kinds of Tudors Things and who is like, The Best. To @nocompromise-noregrets for Ellie, for answering archives questions and just in general. To @gen-is-gone - a saati in the making, holder of correct Doctor Who Opinions forever. To @herawell - the bravest when scared, indulges my OT3 verse. To @miabicicletta - one of the best fic writers, so generous and kind and whose comments make my entire day. @eidetictelekinetic - my favourite Tudors Fic Writer is my Friend Now and is awesome.
@jkthinkythoughts <333333.
@lorata - whose worldbuilding leaves me in awe and who is just, frankly absolutely great.
@isagrimorie because CORRECT DOCTOR WHO AND BEST META
@feuillesmortes for never failing to make me think, to post beautiful poetry and for the best H7/EOY sources and for always, above all being kind.
@hoursofreading @becauseforoncethisisme (special shout out to you <3) @disredspectful (oh my gosh your words)
@anhaga @goshawke @beatrice-otter @alexseanchai <333333
Also @nurselaney for indulging my Thomas/Mihrimah Content and also the women of the SOE.
@sherwoodknights for Scarlet Pimpernel and also Patrick Gibson feels.
@quillington - for correct Anne Boleyn and Scarlet Pimpernel thoughts and also being The Sweetest.
@lordlykisses - kindness and Taylor Swift. And @cleoselene for Taylor Swift and kind words I will also never forget.
To The Cromwell/James Frain Appreciation Brigade - @uncheckedaggression @reallyginnyf (also a fellow hurt/comfort enjoyer) @cinemaocd - thank you <3.
To all the West Wing Discord People - I adore you. Thank you for being so kind and welcoming and wonderful.
And to all my mutuals. Thank you for bearing with me this year, with so much kindness. I know it’s been A Lot but I have, despite everything felt so so loved.
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