#I just wanna have an excuse to do something fun or maybe interact with y’all…

[purpleminte]

ough forgot to mention getting 500 folks followin,, it’s a lot hdhdh,, anyone have any suggestions for something to do with it? 👉👈

[mnthpprt]

Chapter 30: All That Knowledge And No Experience

[As y’all can probably tell from the lack of original posts, I’ve been pretty blocked with this chapter. There’s other parts of the story that I have planned out and really want to get to already, so this just feels like writing filler even though I love focusing on Anaïs’ interactions with all the residents. Sorry if it’s not as interesting T_T but good, juicy shit is coming soon, I promise!]

“Anaïs, wait.” Before I can follow Napoleon off the carriage, Isaac grips my wrist to stop me. I turn to him, confused, and he silently reaches up to adjust the velvet choker around my neck. “That’s better,” he says, blushing slightly. “The bruise was showing.”

“Oh. Thank you,” I smile.

Napoleon offers his hand to help me step down onto the cobbled street. I quickly let go and light myself a cigarillo before taking hold of his arm again, letting him guide me down the road, Isaac close behind us.

“You still haven’t told me where we’re going,” I remind them, earning a chuckle from Napoleon.

“You’ll see.”

I become absorbed by a patient silence, quietly smoking as we walk. By the time we come to a stop in the middle of a square, I have already put out my cigarillo. A group of children are gathered by the fountain. I wonder what they’re playing.

To my surprise, Isaac approaches them. A little girl’s face lights up as she rushes to hug him, causing a shy smile to grow on his face, and the rest of the children quickly stop what they are doing and focus their attention on my companions.

“Bonjour, everyone!” Napoleon announces, only for the children to greet him in unison. “Let’s see, who’s missing... Has anyone seen Mathieu?”

“He fell off a tree and sprained his ankle!” a boy yells his reply from the back of the group. Most of them have sat down on the floor, facing towards us, expectantly.

“Oh, no! If you visit him, André, tell him I hope he gets better soon,” Napoleon sighs. He then claps once, indicating the start of what I now think is a lesson of some sort. “Alright, gamins, before we start, I would like to introduce you to our friend. Say hello to Anaïs, everyone!” The children oblige, yelling out a poorly coordinated chorus of ‘bonjours’ as Napoleon gently nudges me in front of him. I wave my hand at them with a chuckle. “She is a scientist, like Isaac.”

I open my mouth to correct him, but Isaac is already ahead of me.

“Physics and chemistry are two entirely different disciplines, you should know that by now,” he lightly scolds the soldier before turning to the ‘audience’. “So yes, she is a scientist, but we focus on separate fields. Any questions?”

“Me! Me!” The little girl that hugged Napoleon waves her hand in the air enthusiastically, and Isaac nods, signalling her to speak. “Hello mademoiselle Anaïs, my name is Marie and I would like to know what is ‘chimistry’,” she rambles quickly, causing me to laugh at her cuteness.

“Well, Marie...” I begin to answer, smiling. I make sure to talk louder so the rest of the group can hear. “Chemistry is like... a recipe for the world. Everything around us is made of tiny little particles that are too small for us to see. There are different types of them, and they combine to make... well, everything. Including ourselves,” I explain, gesturing vaguely at my surroundings. “I study how those different particles react with each other to make new things, and try to find combinations that work well together, that are stable. Does that make sense?” I ask. The students nod.

“What is ‘stable’?” an older boy, about 12 or so, chimes in. I look at Napoleon, and he smiles at me approvingly.

“That’s a very good question... What’s your name?”

“Pierre,” he answers.

“Alright, Pierre. Imagine I’m baking a cake. What would happen if I forgot to put eggs in the batter?” I start, gaining confidence. This is easy.

“It would... fall apart?”

“Correct! The ingredients don’t work well without the egg to keep it all together. The egg makes it stable, so it stays as it is instead of all the different parts of the cake trying to separate. Now, what if I got the eggs right, but I used sand instead of flour?” I continue, chuckling at the disgusted noises from the younger kids. “That would be... I don’t know what that would be, but certainly not a cake!” They laugh along with me. I am not exactly comfortable with teaching, but at least they think I’m funny. “Do you all see what I mean? If I changed one ingredient in the mix, the result would be a completely different thing. If I stirred them in the wrong order, or if I baked it all at the wrong temperature for the wrong amount of time, the result would no longer be a cake. Maybe something resembling a cake, but it would not have all the qualities of one.”

I observe the crowd of children for a few seconds, but no further questions seem to pop up, so I let Napoleon take over as I go sit on the edge of the fountain. It’s taller than the one in the mansion’s garden, and I struggle a little to climb on the stone surface while keeping my dress out of the water. I wobble briefly, convinced that I am about to fall, but ultimately manage to find my balance and get comfortable.

As Isaac and Napoleon begin to divide the students in two groups, he turns to me, questioningly. I think he wants me to join them.

“Oh, I don’t have anything prepared, Napo,” I say, flustered. “Can’t teach if I’m not ready. Besides, I want to watch you two,” I smile from my seat. “What you’re doing with these kids is great... I’m sure they’ll thank you for it in the future.”

Although neither of them really explained the situation, then did not have to. Judging by the children’s clothes, they were probably not privileged enough to afford an education. And then, there’s the fact that we’ve bee teaching class in the town square, as opposed to, you know, an actual school. It’s rewarding charity work, and I can see why they do it. I, however, have no idea how to teach, and I don’t want to ruin the lessons they had planned for the day.

Napoleon teaches history to his half of the group. He tells it like a tale, his charm and flair inevitably captivating the attention of the children. They will surely remember every word he says if he keeps making it that interesting. Meanwhile, Isaac slowly makes his way through each individual student, correcting their equations and taking his time to explain everything they have trouble with. He works patiently, aware of each child’s capacity, and gently guides them towards the correct answer without giving it away. It’s actually quite sweet.

I enjoy watching them until the bell of a nearby church tolls, and I count the chimes. Time to go. I approach Isaac to tell him, as he is the one closest to me, and he excuses himself to the children, pulling me aside. Napoleon sees and does the same before joining us.

“Thank you for today, it was lovely to see this side of you two,” I explain with a smile. “But I have to leave now. Don’t wanna be late for the play.”

“Be careful, nunuche,” Napoleon tells me, growing serious. I wave him off, rolling my eyes.

“Seriously, I’ll be fine!” I protest, annoyed, before turning to Isaac. “All good?” I tilt my head up so he can see my neck and point at the velvet ribbon tied around the bruises. He takes a look.

“All good,” he repeats. “Have fun at the theatre.”

“Thanks.”

I stand on my toes to kiss both their cheeks, like I usually do, and wave at the children as I walk away from the group. I make my way into a narrow street, following the map I brought with me. This time, le Comte gave me a purse along with the dress and choker, and it has proven to be very useful. No more storing items in my stockings, at least. 

A carriage passes by me and abruptly stops. Speak of the devil, it is le Comte’s voice I hear calling out to me from inside.

“Need a ride, ma chérie?” he offers, opening the door.

“Thanks, comte, but I prefer to walk. I haven’t really done much since, you know,” I explain, pointing at my neck, “so I appreciate the exercise.”

He retreats back to say something to the driver, but he speaks to quickly for me to catch it. He then proceeds to step out of the carriage fully before it drives off without him.

“Allow me to accompany you, Anaïs,” he smiles, offering his arm. “I, too, was invited to the opening.” 

“Great, we get to actually spend time together this time,” I reply, returning the smile, and hold on to his arm. He chuckles.

The conversation continues where we left off three days ago in his study. Le Comte is extremely charming, almost supernaturally so. I had forgotten that he is supernatural, but it no longer bothers me. I think it never really did.

We are about halfway to the theatre when he leans down and whispers in my ear without stopping.

“We’re being followed.” 

I turn around to shoot a discreet glance behind me, and sure enough, a man I saw near the square is walking a few paces behind us. I barely noticed him then, but now that I am paying attention, I recognize him from the coffee house. Shit.

We are crossing the same part of the city. That’s probably how he found me. Regardless, I know this neighbourhood already, and I can take advantage of that. I pull le Comte into an alleyway and press myself against the wall. For a moment I think we’ve lost the man, but my breath of relief gets stuck in my throat when I hear his footsteps approaching once again.

“Kiss me,” I command, pulling on le Comte’s lapel to force him closer.

“Pardon?”

“No time to explain, just do it.” He stares at me, confusion glimmering in the gold of his eyes. “Dude, just kiss me, quickly!” I whisper urgently. He hesitantly meets my lips with his and puts his arms on either side of me to lean on the wall as I push him against me, my hand on the back of his neck.

The kiss is chaste, a fact obscured by the deceivingly passionate position we are in. I keep my eyes open throughout, enough to see the man from the coffee house peek into the alleyway and then leave, uttering a curse at the prospect of having lost sight of me. It isn’t until his footsteps fade away completely that I turn my face away from le Comte, a sigh of relief managing to escape my lips this time.

“Sorry about that,” I breathe out. “I’m the one he was after.”

“Is he the man Sebastian told me about? Is he giving you any more trouble?” he asks, worried.

“You mean with the coffee? Yeah, that’s him.” I thought he would have forgotten me after a few weeks, but it turns out that man is as bitter as the drinks he scams people into paying.

“You do know I could have fought him, don’t you? He is no match for a pureblood vampire, after all,” le Comte says, looking in the direction of the main street. “Nobody threatens my guests. That scoundrel needs to be taught a lesson-”

“You will do no such thing,” I interrupt him, interlocking my fingers with his before he can get away. “Arthur already punched him in the face and it only made things worse. Besides, we have somewhere to be. Don’t want your shirt to get wringkled or something.”

“You are right,” he chuckles. “Ma chérie, always so thoughtful. Although if you see that man again, do not hesitate to let me know. I will handle it,” he assures me, regaining his serious expression. The look in his eyes is threatening, but not towards me. I have never seen him like that, even though he is certainly protective of me. That he has proven since the day we met.

“Okay,” I nod, making eye contact so he can see I understood. I begin walking out of the alleyway and gently pull him along, still grasping his hand. “Now let’s go, we’re going to be late.”

[quicktelling-blog]

Amira’s Vanished Hustle, Perceptions of Missed Opportunities, and What Everyone Should Consider About the Story So Far

[deep dive under the cut]

Some messages I got over the weekend were along the lines of: “No Damira again on Friday whew you must be heartbroken huh?” But, y’all, I wasn’t surprised. And to be completely honest, my reaction on Friday was very different from the ones I saw in the tag. Yeah, I was super happy for the adorable Amira and I was also side-eying the glaring absence of Carlos’s besties at his own housewarming -- but my main thought after the clip was: “LOL OH SHIT HERE WE GO.” Because in my mind Friday was an ENORMOUS RED FLAG that the only substantial thing left to do in Amira’s story arc is the cute Bon Voyage party to send her off on her dream trip. Even before this big POV shift happened, Druck hadn’t given us any reason to expect much more than that in her remaining plot, and I’ll elaborate on that here.

I don’t wanna jump to the conclusion that Druck can’t possibly stick the landing, because hey, they might! We have no clear idea what will happen between now and the final goodbye party, so maybe good things are coming that will subvert all of our worst imaginings! But I feel like this is a hinge point in the season to do a little reassessing of expectations... and to come clean about one big reason why I’ve mostly spoken superficially about this season up until now.

The very first red flag, for me, was when I realized Druck was planning to basically pretend Amira never had a job. That oversight might not seem like a big deal to most, and it’s not like her job was the first thing Druck ever made disappear unceremoniously (remember when Leonie and Sara had other close girl friends? lol) but to me it was a signal that my expectations for Amira’s story (based on her previous strong characterization) had maybe been too high. And I immediately felt a bit cheated.

Amira was already so fleshed out coming into her season. She was demanding, quick-witted, and nurturing. She was fiercely protective of her friends, and even more fiercely ambitious, with a willingness to work harder than anyone to get ahead in life. She was sunny but tough-shelled, with a well-established resistance to trusting any men. And, loving her as much as I do, I felt strongly that she deserved to have plenty of brand new story elements that reflected all those things. To have her own story shaped around her, rather than she herself being reshaped to fit Sana’s story.

But then it was finally her turn to shine, in a Summer season, when it would make perfect sense for her to be on a job grind to earn cash for her trip, and... she’s not working? Huh? She managed to work all through a tough school year, but not her free summer vacation? Why? Because of Druck’s low budget? Because they lacked cohesion in the writing process? Some combination of the two? Yikes. Who knows. But suddenly, nonsensically, they had flushed away the perfect framing to showcase her work ethic, her daily perseverance, and her varied interactions (good and bad) with lots of strange customers around Berlin.

It felt like a bad omen to me somehow. Which wasn’t a great mindset to start the season with. And that was the beginning of me trying very, very hard not to be confused and salty about every little thing I began to perceive as missed opportunities to give Amira a new kind of substance in her story.

For example: While David, Matteo, and Sam began having fun off-screen, working on an bold alien movie, Amira inexplicably had no involvement. She kinda scoffed at the idea when it came up on-screen, then immediately lost interest in the conversation because her man was texting. Fair enough, right? That scene was moving her story forward while generously giving a little shoutout to the meta insta storyline, right? The problem is: the off-screen story ended up seeming much more interesting than watching Amira chilling on her own texting a bunch, and we weren’t even given a reason for her to not be part of it after the whole crew was invited to join in. Imagine if we had followed her onto a shitty little makeshift movie set and seen her reacting to the chaos and strangeness of it. Imagine her finding a resourceful solution to a production hiccup or mediating a creative disagreement while trying to hide her own inner turmoil from her friends. And imagine her having an extremely important conversation with David (and/or Matteo and/or Sam) about the film’s deeper themes of alienation and otherness that they can both sadly relate to.

That’s just one weirdly specific scenario, but there are sooo many other ways I fantasized about Amira bonding with her friends (particularly the ones who aren’t cishet white kids or brand new characters). Talking with one or more of them about what it means to be dangerously marginalized, or to be afraid of letting someone get close to you, or to feel torn in two different directions in life. Maybe something like that could still happen before the season ends, but I’m not counting on it. And I think the time has passed for it to have the biggest impact. It could’ve been amazing (and really narratively useful!) if it happened before the resolution of Amira’s brief conflicts with Kiki, Erva, and Mohammed. We saw a lot of scenes with her looking angry and sad, but we weren’t really privy to much of her thought process during all that reflection, so it felt uncomfortably unearned when problems she once saw as insurmountable were shortly waved aside. I would’ve really appreciated even a short conversation with some good change-of-heart exposition.

And while other people were cheering about all the controversial Sana season conflicts being blessedly truncated or completely stripped away, the whole time I couldn’t stop thinking: “Okay, awesome, but what are they gonna replace that storyline with? Nothing?” And, for the most part, that seemed to be true.

But the problem clearly wasn’t limited to a shortage of well-integrated story threads with Amira at their center. It was arguably also a failure to capitalize on the stories they did use. Instead of getting to watch the emotional fight with her mother about punching someone, and witnessing Amira faced with the threat of losing Australia, we only heard about the drama afterward. Just like we only heard about her family’s religious holiday together. Just like we only got a few texts between Amira and Jonas about the refugee event. And just like how, as I sat typing this, Amira’s mother re-blessed the trip off-screen. On and on goes the list of examples of this unfortunate tell-don’t-show approach, and I’m sure a lot of it can be attributed to low budget and tricky cast scheduling, but the time limit excuse probably doesn’t apply if Amira’s main plot really has been efficiently pared down to 7 episodes.

Don’t get me wrong, I want to reserve final judgment on the season until the credits roll, and there are plenty of good things to say about it in the meantime. Yes, it’s been lovely to see so many gorgeous shots of Tua praying, and boxing, and expressing everything from attraction to anguish to helpless rage. Yes, she and Hassan both did some really strong work selling the magnetic pull between their characters, even in the face of (what I consider to be) an underdeveloped narrative that didn’t totally sell me on the relationship overall. Yes, it was wonderful to have some aesthetically pleasing scenes of the girl squad loving and supporting each other, even if they mostly talked about boys the way Amira hoped they wouldn’t. And obviously just having a story about a strong, kind, devoted hijabi girl is vitally important visibility. So I really haven’t wanted to say anything negative in the face of all that...

... but now I have to say: if you’re feeling cheated and mad about the POV shift, then take some time to consider what else specifically you think should’ve happened to Amira before we entered this resolution phase of her story. It seemed like most people were perfectly happy for her to not face any complex conflict, and not have any lingering hardship to dramatically and triumphantly overcome. Every obstacle getting a relatively swift and easy solution felt underbaked to me, but it was a big relief and source of praise for most people in the tags right up until Amira disappeared from clips. So: in hindsight, how would you have added not just length, but also more compelling drama and greater social impact to her story, so that the extra length felt well-used? It’s really worth thinking and talking about that, even if you’re hesitant to voice any criticism of Amira’s part of the story (even after the season ends, and even if it’s totally constructive) -- because thinking and talking about it is how we’ll get that kind of richer, fuller story in the future.

[hydra-collector]

Let Me Go (Special)

AO3

Let Me Go

Pairings: Intrulogical, platonic Analogical

Characters: Logan Sanders, Remus Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Janus Sanders (small character)

TW: lots of self-deprecation, sex mention

Words: 1838

Summary: Backstory to Logan and Remus’s relationship in sophomore year. 

Note: I wanted to write this for a while, but I mostly wrote it now because I needed an excuse to make a series out of this and boost it on AO3. Still not sure if it’s gonna work.

They just look so soft.

Logan desperately wanted to be with them. It wasn’t like anything he’d felt before. Sure, he’d had crushes, but Remus was on another level. It was odd, really, that he could be this infatuated with someone. Virgil had been trying to convince him to ask them out, but he couldn’t see why they’d want to date him. He was annoying, dumb, and ugly.

“C’mon, Logan. Do it.”

“Why would they accept?”

“Why do you think? They blush every time they see you. Y’all can’t even talk to each other anymore, you’re so in love.”

Logan and Remus had met last year, freshman. They’d argued back to the teacher, who decided to give them detention. Logan, however, believed that they’d made a strong point about the content of their learning in school (even though they suggested some… odd topics instead,) and he argued against the teacher as well.

That was the first time Logan Berry had gotten detention.

The second time was also for their sake, or rather, it was their fault. They’d passed a note to Logan, which simply read, “See you after school.” He obviously hadn’t understood what they meant until they started talking to him, out loud, randomly.

That was the second time the pair of them got detention.

Logan’s had been excused afterwards due to his explained circumstances, but that moment had released a bit of freedom in him. He’d gotten detention. He hadn’t followed the rules.

When he looked back, sitting in the middle of a nearly empty class with Remus next to him, their pretty face smiling, even in the crappy classroom’s lighting, just seeing the eyes and the person and the lips that had brought him here-

He fell in love.

Remus and Logan became friends, and everything changed. They taught him risks and adventure, that life didn’t revolve around being perfect and doing things right. They’d gotten him out of the, so far, darkest point of his life. They’d taught him creativity and experimentation, that he could do more than what school said, or history said, or anything did. He could experiment with how many water balloons you could pile on top of one another before they popped. None of the experiments were perfect or particularly scientific, but god did he have fun.

He started going outside, taking trips to old record shops, thrift stores, and malls, just to see everything. Remus had even convinced him to break into some old mansions and trespass on abandoned train tracks together. He never once took a picture. It was all for his memory.

They’d been each other’s compliment, and listened to each other when no one else cared what they had to say. They could talk and talk and never get bored of each other, just keep listening or adding on to what the other was saying. Sometimes they wondered where all these conversations came from, when all the topics in the world seemed to have run out, but still there was something to say.

Disagreements were never fights. Never. It was always a discussion, talking about how “I’m right and this is why,” while the other tried to change their mind. No one’s ever was, but disagreement is what kept them from doing many stupid things.

And it didn’t last forever, as nothing does. But those were some of the happiest times of his teenage years.

Logan hadn’t realized until Janus had told him that he was in fact, in love.

Remus had realized the moment they laid eyes on Logan and savored every minute they spent together after. They didn’t want to ruin the wonderful platonic relationship they had. And besides, Logan had friends who would convince him to confess if he felt the same way.

Virgil was right about barely being able to talk to each other. Ever since Janus had pointed out his obvious feelings, he’d been especially awkward. He hated it. He knew he should confess in order to retain a steady relationship, platonic or romantic.

But how?

“How do you suggest I go about doing it? I’d like to retain a bit of… me, but being in love is probably a very unlike me kind of thing.”

“No, it is not, Logan. You’ve had crushes on like, six people since I met you.”

“It’s different, though.”

“Why not just tell them ‘I love you?’ It’s simple and obvious and fits your style.”

“What if they take it the wrong way, assume it’s platonic?”

“I guess that could happen. What’s something that’s obviously romantic? ‘I wanna date you?’”

“It sounds odd, though.”

“Wow, picky?”

“I mean, it could work, but I’d rather something more memorable or meaningful.”

“I wanna fuck you?”

Logan tensed. “Ah, um, I’d rather, no.”

“Okay, okay. Do you want to kiss them?”

He thought for a moment, imagining their face, and the love he felt for them, their beautiful eyes and soft cheeks, squishy belly he wished he had the permission to cuddle. The arms that made him nearly collapse because of the wonderful feeling their hugs brought him, their short stature compared to his, and their beautiful lips, out of which so many wonderful ideas and opinions spewed out. He wanted to kiss those lips.

“...Yes.”

“You could use that.”

“I think… maybe I will.”

~~

Today.

Today he was going to tell them.

He’d invited them over to his house, where he imagined over and over telling them, all the ways they might react, especially the negative ways.

He could barely talk to Remus as they walked to his house together, just listening to the endless ideas they came up with. Each word made him love them more and more. Endless possibilities for how the scene may play out repeated over and over in his mind as he panicked internally, hoping they didn’t actually hate him like his brain said they did.

The cold air nipped at his nose and fingers, so he rubbed his hands together in a sad attempt to warm up.

“Cold hands, Lo?”

They took his hands and held them in previously gloved ones, which were still warm. They held them there, trading positions to better warm different fingers every few seconds. Logan felt the heat in his cheeks as well.

When they got inside, Remus went to Logan’s cupboard to grab and make two hot cocoa packets.

“That’s extremely unhealthy.”

Remus said nothing, simply adding another packet to their cup, watching Logan.

“Remus-”

He sighed and let it happen. That was the least of his worries now.

Logan’s heart beat as Remus brought their hot cocoas upstairs to his living room, where he’d planned to confess. They sat down on the couch, putting their arm around him when he did as well.

“Remus, I’ve been meaning to tell you about something.”

“Once you do, do you wanna talk about ancient sea creatures? I read a really good article. Hey, are you alright?”

Logan was shaking with fear, excitement, anticipation, anxiety, everything one could be shaking with.

“Y-yeah.”

“Tell me what you were gonna say. I’m curious.”

What if they hate you? What if they don’t want to be your friend anymore? What if they think it’s weird to date if your asexual? How could they even love you when you are who you are?

He took a deep breath, hoping for the best.

“I want to kiss you.”

“Say no more.”

And Logan had been kissed.

Whatever scenarios ran through his head, this wasn’t one of them. There was one where they’d talked about relationships, one where they agreed and awkwardly asked to and then kissed, one where he was flat-out rejected, one where they thought it was a joke, but nothing like this. Where they just kiss him. He was glad it happened that way.

Logan had expected some kind of verbal reaction, at least. Something like “me too,” or a flirt, at least. But no, just “say no more.” And now he was kissing Remus.

He hadn’t expected to ever reach this point. To be kissing someone he really liked. He wished it would last longer than he knew it would.

He could always kiss them again.

After the few seconds their first kiss had been, both were blushing severely, broken apart. Neither of them said anything, so Logan took his chance to kiss them again. Remus wouldn’t have taken them for someone to initiate a kiss. They weren’t mad, though.

“Thanks.”

What?

“You’re welcome, I guess.”

They laughed it off and spent the next hour discussing the relationships of sea creatures. Probably to avoid talking about their own.

At first, nothing changed much. They still went out on ‘adventures’ together, had the same conversations, interacted with their other friends the same way, and more or less thought of each other the same as they had before.

Logan asked Remus on their first date.

They couldn’t ignore what’d happened forever, and while they weren’t against discussing it, it hadn’t come up naturally. Logan proposed it as a chance to talk about what was to become of their relationship.

“Would you like to consistently date, Remus?”

“I’d enjoy that.”

“My being asexual isn’t a problem?”

“Nah,” they sipped their coffee, “I fell in love with you anyway.”

That was a relief.

“What should we call ourselves, if anything?”

“At somepoint, probably partners. In crime.”

“Don’t remind me that that’s true.”

“I don’t know how I managed to get a date. ‘Specially with you. You’re so cute and all I do is talk about organs and weird creatures and make sex jokes.”

“I do that too, Remus. Usually not sex jokes, though. And I disagree, I’m quite ugly and frankly obnoxious to most people I meet. You’re pretty and lovable.”

“I suppose I’m not most people you meet, then. And I can’t even begin to explain how cute you are. Your glasses make it perfect.”

Logan asked Remus on most of the dates, mostly because wherever they would ask him was illegal or paid, often museums. Logan savored these days.

As they went on more dates, kissed more openly, cuddled more often, the consideration of each other changed from ‘dating’ to ‘partner’ and ‘boyfriend.’ The first time Remus gave Logan a pet name, he was initially adverse to it, but warmed up to them as they kept saying them. After a while, they probably used it more than his real name. He still refused to return affection in this form, however. Remus was sure he someday would (he denied it.)

They were happy together. Janus was glad to see Logan had expressed his emotions, for once, and it led to a lot more happiness. It wasn’t always going to be as happy as it was that year, but he had someone as close as a romantic partner to help him through it. A few years later, he would make decisions he’d later regret, but there was no regret for confessing his love that day.

And sophomore year, those two best friends became partners.

[seouledbysisi]

Moonlit

Chapter 15

Riley stood and smoothed down her gown. “Will you excuse me for a moment?” She leaned down and whispered to Junwon.

Junwon nodded and grabbed her hand softly. “Everything okay?”

She nodded with a small smile. “Yeah, I need to freshen up.” She walked over to where Sapphire was seating.

“Hey come to the bathroom with me.” She smiled at Bloo as if to ask if it was okay if she stole her away for a moment.

Sapphire looked over to Bloo. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

“Yeah for sure. I’ll be here waiting.” He fiddled with his hands.

Sapphire knew he was a bit uncomfortable with the situation at hand but there was nothing she could do about it.

Riley grabbed hers and Chaeyoung’s hand and they headed out of the ballroom and straight to the bathroom.

“Everything okay Riley?” Sapphire asked as she watched Riley stare at herself in the mirror.

Chaeyoung took a deep breath. “Who the hell is that chick? She’s awful!”

Riley and Sapphire burst out laughing.

“Oh yeah you didn’t get the pleasure of meeting her. Well that is Woojae’s ex or something. She was also at the hospital visiting him.” Sapphire explained.

Chaeyoung’s eyes widened. “She’s all over him and it’s nauseating! Like get a freaking room. This is a gala and she’s acting more like it’s a strip club or something.”

Riley smirked. “That’s why I had to get away. It’s awkward with her at the table and Woojae seems uncomfortable. It’s just annoying. Why the heck would he bring her and not even ask you?”

Sapphire shrugged. “I don’t know and honestly I don’t care. Bloo asked me and that’s all that matters. I’m honestly having a really good time with him. He’s different now.” She gave them a shy smile.

Chaeyoung smiled. “At this point in team Bloo since Woojae wanted to bring that skank here!”

Sapphire laughed. “I better get back out there before Bloo thinks I’ve made a run for it.”

Riley poked her lip out. “The torture is real at that table and I don’t understand a word anyone is saying because no one is speaking English except when Junwon talks to me directly.”

“It’s because that girl is occupying the conversation so much. She’s really getting on my nerves. She’s an atheist toon whore. I’m ready to go.” Chaeyoung pouted.

“Me too. I’m done eating and Bloo’s friends are talking about going to a club or something in a little while.” Sapphire told them as they exited the restroom.

“I’m ready to get out of this gown and take off these heels and throw my hair up in a bun!” Riley was exhausted.

“Can we go back to y’all crib and just have a movie night?” Chaeyoung asked.

Sapphire and Riley both were in shock. “You actually wanna hang out with us?” Sapphire asked.

“I miss y’all.” She admitted and pulled them into her embrace.

“I’m pretty sure Junwon is staying over but I’m down if y’all are!” Riley agreed.

“Can Noah come?” Chaeyoung asked with her hands clasped together.

Riley rolled her eyes playfully. “Of course silly.”

“I guess I’ll be third wheeling it with you guys which I’m totally okay with!” Sapphire added and walked back to the table where Bloo was sitting.

“Boo!” She said in his ear.

He jumped a little and laughed. “You know you could’ve gave me a heart attack, right?”

She shrugged. “You already had one when you first saw me tonight.” She winked and sat down beside him.

“Aye man, you clubbing tonight with us?” Nafla asked.

Bloo glanced over at Sapphire.

“You’re free to go. You’ve made tonight good for me. You don’t owe me anything else.” Sapphire nodded.

Bloo thought for a moment. Did he really want to go to a club when he could spend more time with this beautiful lady. “What are you planning on doing?”

“I’m going home and getting comfortable. I’ll probably lay down and watch movies or just go to sleep. You can go with the guys, I swear it won’t make me upset.”

“I could go home too, maybe call you?” Bloo suggested.

Sapphire shrugged. “Whatever you wanna do.”

“Or-“ Bloo started.

Sapphire raised an eyebrow. “Or what?”

“I could come over your place and watch movies with you? I don’t really want the night to end. We don’t need to do anything I just want your company.” He explained.

Sapphire’s cheeks warmed up a bit. “No sex involved buddy.”

“I don’t want you for that. I’m down to cuddle, I’m really good at that. But you already know that.” Bloo pulled her into a hug. “I am trying to change, let me prove it to you.”

Sapphire took a deep breath. “Okay.”

Bloo began to grin. “Riley won’t mind right?”

“No, Chaeyoung and their boyfriends are going to be there anyway. I was just going to join them for a movie night.” She laughed a bit.

“Well now you have me, so you won’t be alone.” Bloo grabbed her hand and pulled her towards Riley’s table.

Everyone stood getting ready to leave.

Woojae looked over at Sapphire. They locked eyes. He could feel the tension and he had no idea she would be there and he didn’t know how to explain why he was there with someone else but he knew she deserved some type of explanation. He could tell by her aura that she didn’t want that explanation right then though and he was trying his best to respect that but something in him really wanted to talk to her. His date excused herself from the group and went to the bathroom.

Woojae tapped Sapphire on the shoulder. “Hey how are you?”

Sapphire looked up at him and simply stared. “Hello. I’m really good actually. This has been a nice night!”

Her enthusiasm took him aback. It was like a slap in his face. “Oh...wow. That’s good. Can we talk for a moment?”

She looked over at Bloo.

“I’m going to go tell Nafla that I’m heading with you guys. I’ll be right back.” He kissed her cheek and walked away.

Woojae hated their interaction. He actually thought Bloo might be out of the picture finally but clearly he wasn’t. “So you’re here with Bloo I see.”

She nodded. “Yep, he invited me.”

“Well that was nice of him. I wanted to invite you but-“

She shook her head. “You don’t owe me an explanation.”

“No but I want to. I need to. I wanted you here with me, even more now that I see you with him and you seem happy but my parents have really been on me about her. Actually my dad doesn’t care who I date but my mom really likes her. Her family and my family are pretty close. There’s nothing happening between us though I swear!”

Sapphire chuckled. “Honestly it doesn’t matter if there was something going on. You chose who you wanted to be here with and that’s fine so don’t try and pacify me over a decision that you felt was best for you. I promise you I’m good. We’re good.”

“It’s not like that-“ Woojae started but Bloo walked up so he ended the conversation. “Y’all have a good rest of the night.” He nodded in Bloo’s direction and walked away.

Bloo figured it’d be best not to even worry about what their conversation was about. “You ready to go?”

“Yes because my feet are killing me! These heels have got to go.” She said as she walked hastily to his vehicle.

Sapphire and Bloo made it to the apartment first.

“I’m going to get changed and I’ll meet you back out here.” She told him and headed to her room. Before she disappeared she stepped back. “I’m being rude, would you like something to drink?”

He shook his head. “I know where the fridge is. Go get comfortable, I know your feet hurt.” He gave her small smile.

The others arrived shortly after and the other two men sat down in the living room with Bloo.

“I don’t think we’ve officially met but I’m Noah or Haon. Whichever is fine.” Noah extended his hand to Bloo.

Bloo shook it. He was shocked that this moment wasn’t awkward. “I’m Bloo. Nice to meet you.”

“So you’re dating Sapphire? Are y’all serious or-“ Noah interrogated.

Bloo chuckled. “We’ve been hanging out for a while but this was our first date I guess.”

“Hm. Do you want it to get serious?”

Junwon pushed Noah. “Noah, Stop! You gonna rub him off.”

“No it’s cool. I really like her if that’s what you’re getting at. I think she’s special and I like her in my company.” Bloo shrugged a little. “That’s all i got for now.”

Noah nodded. “That’s all you need, bro. Thats the perfect recipe for something good to happen. Me and Chaeyoung aren’t perfect but I like being around her and when I’m not around her I’m wishing she were there. I’m not the most romantic person but we have fun and she seems to like me so it’s all good right now.”

Junwon nodded quietly.

The girls came out with their jammies on.

Sapphire sat on the couch next to Bloo. She made sure she wasn’t right under him. She still felt a little weird spending time with him on this level.

Riley snuggled into Junwon’s side at the opposite end of the couch.

Chaeyoung took it upon herself to sit in Noah’s lap.

Riley cleared her throat as she eyed her little sister.

“What?!” Chaeyoung exasperated.

Riley sighed. “I forget you’re growing up. Watch those hands though Noah.”

“Duly noted ma’am.” He threw a thumbs up at her.

Sapphire grabbed a blanket and draped it across her legs. “Are you cold?”

Bloo smirked. “Are we sharing covers now? Man we’re moving on up.” He laughed.

“I’m sorry, I can get you one too if you want.” Sapphire squeezed her eyes shut from embarrassment. She didn’t want him to feel as though he was being treated like a boyfriend. She knew that was too much for him.

He grabbed the blanket and pulled it over his legs as well. “That was a joke, you know that right?”

She exhaled softly. “I’m sorry I’m just in my head.”

“Just calm down. This doesn’t have to be weird. You know me and I know you and I want to be here with you. Capiche?” He rubbed her leg softly with a whisper.

She looked up at him with dough-like eyes. “Okay.” She whispered back.

They had decided to watch a horror movie and boy was it scary. The girls were covering their eyes the most of the time.

Bloo pulled Sapphire’s legs up on his so she’d be more comfortable. He started to massage her feet.

Sapphire flinched. “I don’t like my feet to be touched.”

Bloo stared at her for a moment. “Do your feet still hurt?”

“I mean yeah but-“ she started.

Bloo continued to grip her feet so she couldn’t pull away. “Then let me massage your feet. You’ll love it by the time I’m done.”

She rolled her eyes and tried to take her mind off of it.

Riley was mesmerized as she watched their interaction. Bloo had really left a mark on her tonight. “You never told me why he was being weird earlier.” She whispered to Junwon.

Junwon looked up at Bloo & Sapphire. “He’s really feeling her. Like a lot. He told me and Noah that he likes being around her. He’s smitten for sure.”

Riley smiled a bit as she eyed Bloo and Sapphire and then Chaeyoung and Noah sleeping on the loveseat. She felt like things were finally coming together as they should. She felt like Sapphire was finally getting back to herself. She felt like love was actually tangible for her. What shocked her was that she was oddly comfortable with the idea that Bloo could possibly be her saving grace. She didn’t see that coming.

“Why are you smiling so much?” Junwon asked as he pulled her closer into him.

She shrugged and stroked the tats on his arms. “Because tonight could’ve gone a lot different and I pictured it differently but in the end everyone’s happy and that makes me happy.”

He kissed her forehead. “Well I’m as happy as I’d like to be. . .” Junwon started.

Riley craned her neck around to look up at him. “What? Why?!”

“Because I really want to get closer to you and I can’t do that if we’re out here with everyone else.” He pouted.

Riley rolled her eyes. “You want some of mamas love?”

He nodded as he caressed her cheek.

She stood from the couch and held her hand out. “Then i’ma give you what you want.”

[borderline-off-fangame]

Birb answers random questions you probably thought about asking!

Might as well do this. *shrug emoji* 

Q: When did you start working on Borderline?

A: September 18th, 2015 is when I sort of started working on Borderline? beforehand I actually wrote a fanfic.. it was terrible.. then again, the first few updates even more terrible. It’s been 3 years since I started working on it, and I’ve made quite a lot of progress over the course of a year. 

Q: What do you use to make assets? 

A: Sai to draw, and gimp and paint.net to save them in 8-bit format (if it has textures, use gimp. paint.net just.. fucks it up even if you lower transparency on that bitch). For voices and edits, I use audacity, and my laptop mic to record my voice.. not sure what wolf uses to make their music, you might have to ask them, as for chii, she doesn’t use sai, i know she uses medibang now??? again, ask them!!

Q: What got you to write the story in the first place? 

A: uuuuu.. too much fangames inspired me to make my own thing. It wasn’t as much solid as it was, but the premise was still the same: Max has to deliver food to the Guardians. Of course, I had to make several changes to the story, because the first variation, you already knew what you had to do. In the current version, Max has no idea why Puppeteer is there, and what their intention is, other than to help you with your job. There might be more changes to the story in the future, probably minor changes and shit like that, but the main premise still stays the same!

Q: You accept cameos in your game?

A: YES, ABSOLUTELY, GIVE ME YOUR CHILDREN RIGHT NOW AND I WILL EMBED THEIR CHARACTER FILES INTO MY GAME FOREVER!! ... yes, yes I do actually! From time to time, I do accept cameo appearances in my game, but these cameo appearances don’t like.. uuuh.. how to put this. usually cameo appearances are done where like the character simply exists and doesn’t contribute anything other than just.. existing. In Borderline however, each cameo has it’s own purpose in the game, as I want the cameos to DO SOMETHING other than just stand idly and exist, so of course, each cameo is given a purpose. So when you give me your character, I make sure to do them a lot of justice!

Q: Can we use your assets? 

A: I’d rather you ask first, but chances are that I would say no, and instead would offer to make assets for you. Even with school, I have lots of time on my hands and always need some kind of excuse to get out of my comfort zone and do stuff. I also make free assets from time to time, so you’re allowed to use those as long as you provide credit. In short, if you want some assets, don’t hesitate to ask me to make you some assets. Again, it gives me an excuse to do stuff.

Q: Are you in need of aid or suggestions maybe?

A: ... always! I’m just either too anxious to ask for help, or I’m unsure of how to organize myself and tell people what I am in need.. The most important thing I am ALWAYS in need of are beta-testers, and of course, the more the merrier! Not everyone might point out the same bugs as everyone else when they play my game, and most of the time I beta-test the game.. every. single. time I set up an event to MAKE SURE it works the way I want it!! ...But sometimes I happen to miss a couple.. or maybe a little bit more. (and I burned myself out doing that oops.) But even if you decide to offer your help, I’d be utmost grateful! 

Q: Is your game crossover friendly?

A: The fuck you saying, Borderline is the biggest crossover you’ll ever get to play! ...Yes my game is crossover friendly dun worry! ;w; Not sure why I’d answer that question but if you’re curious, refer to two questions above (the cameo one).

Q: Where do we report bugs?

A: You can use the submit box to report any bugs you find. If possible, provide a screenshot and submit it there. You can also personally IM me if you feel comfortable ;w; Just please.. be specific when you’re reporting a bug. I really can’t fathom at all, as I’m but a slow dunce and might not understand what you’re saying at first... I’msosorry!!!

Q: What program are you using to make the game?

A: Rpgmaker 2003. It’s only 20 bucks both on steam and on the official site (doe I did buy it from the official site cuz steam is hecc.. and my laptop can only handle so much. :’3) 

Q: I am stuck somewhere, and I need help!

A: There is a solution folder which can be found within the game, not only does it contain images, but it also contains videos as well.. Remind me to uh.. fix a couple of dem.. puzzles.. yes.. 

Q: Is it okay to make fanart/ask/rp blogs of your characters? 

A: Why yes, it’s actually okay! I really appreciate the gesture! For art, because the tagging system (on tumblr) can’t get any more wonkier than it is, so if I don’t see something that you drew for me, please don’t feel bad! It’s just tumblr is fucking garbo. :’3333 Instead, you can use the submit box or IM me. If it’s of lewd nature, I ask of you to NOT DRAW THE FOLLOWING CHARACTERS IN LEWD IMAGERY (and I am copying this from the main blog): Basically the protagons of the game (Max is ace who shames people for fun, doesn’t care about sex at all, Sam is a fucking child, Seneca is not even my own character, Puff is also ace and very sex repulsed, and Aleyes is.. he’s not a tentacle monster that’s for sure.), Asriel (He might be his own character, but.. please don’t fuck the goat!! He’s supposed to be innocent!!!!), Baka (not even mine), Pipscrap (not even mine)., Now.. Regarding ask/rp blogs however, I am okay with it, but do consult with me about it (hey, those are my children, I wanna interact with my own children!!) Plus, I can provide you with a bit of an in-depth detail regarding the characters so you know what’s up.. Which brings another question to light.

Q: Can we ship <insert character here> with <insert character here>???

A: I’m a thotticus for shippings, but I’m a huge ass sucker for chemistry(tm) and relationship development between two or more people! I really wanna see what y’all can come up with really so go crazy!! But, keep in mind..

There are... restrictions however.. mostly with Max and Puff who are in a canonical relationship; this should also apply for AU’s as well, please pleaaaaaase don’t ship them with any other characters other than each other! Not only because I can’t see those two being shipped outside their pairing, but also because their relationship is very critical to the lore itself! So.. please be respectful of my decision! ;; There are other restrictions, but I won’t list them here, because we’d be here for an eternity. ;; Just don’t do illegal shit that can get you called out or worse.. please do ask for restrictions.. ;; 

Q: Is it okay to add Easter Eggs/references regarding your game or your characters in our work? 

A: I’d cry? I’d appreciate you ask me about it first so we can consult and shit, but I’d be hella fine with that!!

Q: You inspired me to start my own game!

A: I know it’s not a question, but I can’t just shrug this one off, please excuse me while I go and scream into the void! *sniffs* I am glad that my work actually inspired you to make your own game, and I cry?? Like I literally feel the feels?? <333333

[goforwardgreenwriter-blog]

The Worm Reads: Empire of Storms, Ch 30 - 31

We got a special treat for y’all today; a double update! Mostly ‘cause the next few chapters are gonna be massive fish to boil, and ‘cause I love you guys.

After two weeks of inching across the muddy open plains, Elide was tired of using her mother’s name.

Christ, I completely forgot about this subplot. Bad pacing who?

Elide says she’s barely interacted with Lorcan or slept by him which is. What. I thought you were supposed to be smart, Elide! You’re pretending he is your husband, if you two act all distant someone is gonna get suspicious. I thought you were better than this....

Lorcan stalked ahead and said without looking back, “We finished at the three dungeons and their entrances yesterday night. Tell me about what’s inside them.”

Elide gets all nervous and Lorcan points out her scent has changed, which is just, ah.... oof. SJM you uh, you got something you wanna tell the class? Something about a werewolf kink, perhaps?

Elide refuses to spill the beans and Lorcan gets all pissy.

We have a bargain, girl.” Elide met that depthless gaze. “You did not specify when I had to tell you. So I may take as much time as I wish to recall details, if you desire to wring every last one of them from me.”

There’s the Elide I know! Finally, a character doesn’t have to be all powerful and magical to succeed and be an actual force.

“What are you,” [Lorcan] said quietly. “I am nothing,” [Elide] said, voice hollow. Maybe once she found Aelin and Aedion, she’d find some purpose, some way to be of use to the world.

Aaaaand take it back. Unless you’re serving Aelin, you’re useless and have no purpose! Or you’re an evil slutty bitch who should be put down. I am so fucking tired.

They finally finish their bickering session and return to the others, then we switch to Lorcan’s POV. They’re setting up tents for everyone, including one for Elide/Lorcan.

Ombriel came forward, throwing her usual wary glance his way, and slyly informed Elide they’d finally have a night alone together. Arms full of logs, Lorcan could only watch as that pale face of sorrow and despair transformed into youth and mischief, into blushing anticipation, as easily as if Marion had held up a mask.

Finally. It’s like you two want this plan to fail or something.

“I’ll sleep on the ground,” [Lorcan] offered blandly. “You take the roll.” “What if someone comes in?” “Then you’ll say we got into a fight.” “Every night?” Marion pivoted, her rich eyes meeting his. The cold, weary face was back.

zzzzzzzz this drama is so boring please progress the plot or do something of interest

They bicker more about Lorcan getting a bath and he asks her how badly her leg hurts. Such riveting dialogue.

Lorcan’s thoughts drifted toward Rowan and his bitch-queen.

Jfc. At least we’re spared Lorcan splooging over them, instead thinking about how much he hates them and how Rowboat was an idiot for falling in love with Alien. Damn, you know it’s bad when I agree with Lorcan.

Lorcan was about to leave when [Elide] said, “My uncle … He is a commander at Morath.”

So Elide drops that bomb, and Lorcan offers to kill her uncle. Not much else happens. This subplot is so mind numbingly boring and dumb. Next!

Well, on the one hand, at least Rolfe’s map worked. It had been Rowan’s idea, actually. And she might have felt slightly guilty for letting Aedion and Lysandra believe the Pirate Lord had only gone after the Amulet of Orynth, but … at least they now knew his unholy map functioned.

This is the first paragraph + sentence of chapter 31. Who is she? Use names when switching to a new POV gdi!!! Alien doesn’t get name dropped until the bottom half of this page.

As for the rest of it … It was just past midnight when Aelin wondered how the hell she and Rowan would ever go back to normalcy if they survived this war.

I’m imagining it’ll be something akin to the A Court of Wings and Ruin; where you guys will angst about how much the war cost you and how everything is different, but in actuality nobody you cared about died and no one important was even permanently injured, and the supposed trauma was just an excuse for porn.

Alien and Rowboat dramatically sneak into a room through the window, using Rowboat’s magic to close it. Gav and Fenrys are waiting inside.

“You could have used the door,” Fenrys said, arms crossed—a bit too casually. “Why bother when a dramatic entrance is so much more fun?” Aelin countered.

Because this isn’t a video game and you’re a princess who is supposed to be a good diplomat and ruler? I’ll forgive SJM if Alien becomes queen, pulls dramatic shit like this, and is instantly banished from the kingdom and Darrow is crowned king. I’d pay extra to read that.

Gavriel’s tattooed hands closed into loose fists. “You deny me the right to see my son and yet you barge into our room in the dead of the night to demand we divulge information about our blood-sworn queen.” “One, I did not deny you anything, kitty-cat.”

Gav deserves better than to have to put up with Alien’s edgy teenager bullshit. She sounds straight out of the 2012 internet phase.

Fenrys asks if Alien has Settled yet for.... some reason. It’s explained here;

She knew enough about it—the transition pureblooded Fae, and some demi-Fae, went through once their bodies locked into immortal youth. It was a rough process, their bodies and magic needing months to adjust to the sudden freezing and reordering of their aging process. Some Fae had no control over their power—some lost it entirely during the time it took to Settle.

Basically it’s an excuse for SJM’s character to stay young appearing and beautiful forever. Because if you’re old in a SJM book you’re instantly not hot and therefore, not good enough for porn.

“How does she do it?” Aelin asked baldly. “With Rowan, it’s not … Every order I give him, even casual ones, are his to decide what to do with. Only when I actively pull on the bond can I get him to … yield. And even then it’s more of a suggestion.” “It is different with her,” Gavriel said softly. “Dependent on the ruler it is sworn to. You two took the oath to each other with love in your hearts. You had no desire to own or rule him.”

Are we really out here praising and kissing Alien’s ass for not treating her boyfriend like a slave? Are you fucking kidding me???? Next we’ll have them weeping in joy at Alien wiping her ass after taking a shit.

She gave him a little smile that she knew drove Rowan and Aedion insane, and—yes. It seemed it was a surefire way to piss off any Fae male, because ire flashed across Fenrys’s stupidly perfect face.

I fucking hate Alien. Also we get it, Fenrys is drop dead gorgeous like everyone else, you can stop now.

Fenrys’s edged smile flashed. “Oh, the losses of Fae lives would be of little concern to [Maeve]. It likely just increases her excitement about it.” “Careful,” Gavriel said. Gods, he nearly sounded identical to Aedion with that tone.

Hhhhhh stop I hate Assdion.... stop making me fucking have feelings over how much he resembles Gav....

“If we say she gave us the order to take everything,” Fenrys drawled, bracing his hands behind him on the bed, “will you kill us, Heir of Fire?” “It’ll depend on how useful you prove to be as an ally,” Aelin simply said. The weight hanging between her breasts beneath her shirt rumbled as if in answer.

“That’s it?” Fenrys demanded. “Do we get to know what you plan to do with this information, or are we just your lackeys, too?”

Sorry Fenrys, them’s the rules. You either bow down to SJM’s perfect snowflake protagonist or you’re a villain who deserves to be slut shammed and killed off.

Rowboat and Alien start making out. Skip!

Oh, gods—this. This was what drove her out of her mind—this fire between them. They could burn the entire world to ashes with it. He was hers and she was his, and they had found each other across centuries of bloodshed and loss, across oceans and kingdoms and war.

You’re just making out, it is literally not that deep. I hate SJM trying to sell her romances as epic world stoppers. No, you two are not Aragorn and Arwen. You both are just horny assholes who deserve to rot.

“Even when you’re in another kingdom, Aelin, your fire is still in my blood, my mouth.” She let out a soft moan, arching into him as his hand grazed her backside, not caring if anyone spotted them in the streets below.

JESUS CHRIST HAVE SOME RESTRAINT YOU SHAMELESS FUCKERS. And no, they don’t actually have sex here. Just you wait, SJM has something special in store for that.

Thank god this chapter is over. But it is only a preview into the madness SJM has in store for us several chapters down the road......

[lcsbicarchive]

[ kaya scodelario, twenty-seven, cis female, she/her ] ━ hey, I just saw [ hazel mendes ] walking down the streets of crownsville. they’ve lived in town for [ a year ], and you can catch them around town working as a [ tattoo artist ]. I hear they’re known to be [ kind-hearted & courageous ] and [ secretive & hypocritical ]. if asked, they would say their aesthetic would be [ coffee stains, sea salty hair, intricate dotwork tattoos, restless hands, smudged eyeliner, lipstick on a plastic fork, paint ridden fingertips, whispered secrets, and beaming smiles ]

i’m jujubee, i like long walks on the beach, bi--- maybe not. hi hello, i’m meg ( she/her ) i dwell in the good ol’ gmt, and i’m not great with introducing myself, but i am gonna admit that i’m typing this up way in advance because i’m excited, so hopefully something decent comes out of it ! but i’mma get to talking about miss gayzel, since she’s probably the more interesting between the two of us, and definitely the more relevant, so introduction to my favourite messy goblin in three,,,two,,,, fun,,, [ edit: yO i so i typed this up a while back bc ya girl got excited, but i just reread it and i have nO idea how helpful it is but i’m currently running around with my head on fire BUT I WANTED TO GET MY INTRO UP ANYWAY AND MEET Y’ALL so tldr: i might edit this later but hi hello nice to meetcha i’ll be on properly in a bit ! ]

honestly when it comes to hazel, i legit always have to no idea where to begin. but she’s an old ass muse for me, and tbh i know her like the back of my hand because of it, and if i can be a honest a lil sappy, i just want a nice rp home to settle in and i’m hoping crownsville will be that for me !

so although hazel has only been in crownsville for a year, georgia is actually her home ! she grew up in atlanta, but moved to new york when she was nineteen after a rough year, and she really just needed a fresh start and to start getting her life together. 

and she was in new york between the ages of nineteen and twenty five ( well, technically twenty six, since she literally turned twenty six a week after moving ) and in those years hazel trained to be and later became a fully qualified tattoo artist ( specialising in dotwork ! ) at a well respected tattoo parlour in ny, called permanent record. in the years she worked there, the original pr began to slowly expand, opening three other shops around the country, and when her boss started talking about opening a fifth, it kinda came at the right time for hazel specifically. 

her last boyfriend ( and i mean last boyfriend; hazel may still be in the closet, but moving from ny to crownsville was the ending point of her burying the bullshit, and she’s fully accepted her flaming lesbianism ) was a fucking garbage can of a human being, so after that relationship finally ended she was kind of looking for an excuse to leave, and lowkey looking for an excuse to go home, the latter partly being because there are parts of herself that are kinda,, missing ? that she lost due to shit going down, and she’d quite like them back ? she doesn’t wanna completely be her old self, because she’s changed a lot for the better, but there are some aspects she’d quite like back. however, moving back to atlanta wouldn’t exactly be the best thing for her, but she would’ve if that’s where her work lead her. which brings me to: her boss kinda casually said that if he opened up another branch somewhere, he’d kinda want someone he knew and trusted to keep an eye on it, so without really thinking, hearing he was thinking of georgia, hazel kinda jumped at the chance and offered to do it.

so that’s how hazel lowkey got promoted whoops. she doesn’t see it that she’s managing pr5, but that’s basically what she’s doing. the deal was, hazel would just be the eyes and ears for Big Boss, as he couldn’t be in two places at once, all while doing her actual job. she’ll deny being the manager/anybody’s boss, but she’s w r o n g. she’s just kinda casual about it. despite her definitely wanting to move anyway but not yet seriously considering it, and the fact she didn’t hate the idea of returning to georgia, she’ll still say she’s back ‘for work’ because,, she’s a goblin. 

but honestly she fucking loves her job, and she owes a lot to her job and to her boss. she’s also living in the apartment above the shop amen god bless

as far as her personality goes, hazel’s a mess of contradictions. she’s kinda had a life that would make it understandable if she were,,,, ruder, i guess ? or just.....bitter ? she’s not exactly the happiest of people, but i think after having a rather eventful life that getting a lil sadness as well as a pretty messy personality is nothing to complain about, since it could be far worse. but she’s a good person ! or, she tries to be. she’s working on it. she’s kind and she’s good but she’s got a repertoire of mistakes in her back pocket that she’s still dealing with, and she thinks stop her from being the good person she’s trying to be. a rather important note and something to keep in mind is that she tends to give off like,,, generally chaotic vibes a lot of the time ? like if you’re meeting her somewhere she’ll arrive late and slightly out of breath, or she can just seem a little flustered, or like her mind’s kinda elsewhere, or like she’s stressed/hassled/has too much to do and not enough time to do it in even if she’s actually doing okay, or if you need a pen she’s sure she has one but by the time she’s emptied her bag and found the pen, you could’ve walked to the shop, bought your own, picked up a milkshake, got a donkey ride, paid for a kid who didn’t have enough money to have their own donkey ride, had a walk in the woods, saved a woman from being mugged by a guy with his finger in his hoodie pocket, walked back, realise you don’t have the pen, can’t remember where you left it, went back to the shop and bought a new pen, and gotten back to her.

but in good news !! she’s a kind person, so plotting is made easier by that ! she’s pretty smiley on a good day, chatty, good with people, and just,, pretty good at the person aspect of her job as well as the actual ,,, Job part of her job. speaking of plotting, i generally kinda tend to suck at it, but i try my best and i make up for my lack of ideas with enthusiasm ! plus i’m always open to whatever ideas y’all may have, but to make our lives easier, i have a little plotties page here ! 

uhhhhh random things bout gayzel: legit thinks piano man it the best song ever written ( closely followed by barracuda,,, ) she’s one of those heathens that likes pineapple on pizza, she has pet fishies called ernie and bert and she cannot tell them apart, loves back to the future but also loves singin in the rain because girlie is your least favourite thespian lesbian, and she’s currently got the cute lil like,, Almost Ombre hair that kaya had in like 2014 or w/e ?? see above for reference sake, and i’m p sure there’s a reference linked in her stats too, which can be found here ! but tldr: the ends are just a lil lighter and it’s cute.

she also has a full ass like 6k word bio but tbh, it’s old, and i’m really not happy with the way it’s written, and despite the fact i never actually finished it, i want to rewrite it, so we’ll consider her current one a placeholder lol. disclaimer: hazel’s general story and background is a little trigger heavy, but obviously everything will be tagged, and her biography has warnings on it, and also says when the warnings have passed so you can keep reading if you wanna. 

okaY so if you got this far, you’re some sort of Wizard whom i greatly appreciate ! as i mentioned, i’m really bad with plotting and ims tend to make me anxious as heckery but if you give this post a lil LIKE i’ll swim into your ims nonetheless in hopefully the least awkward way i can possibly manage, but i’m also just up for having characters interact and see if there’s anything that comes to mind and stuff, but i’m excited to meet your cherubs ! general heads up: i apologise for any typos in this post and in future threads; i proofread everything to hell and back but my brain fuckin hates me so that usually means nOTHING but pls,,, just bear with me, i try my darn best !

[lady-poppy-verona-blog]

buddy holly

“why are these homies dissing my girl? why do they gotta front?”

((aka, challenge three. thanks for the rp, grace! i had a blast :) title and quote creds to weezer. 1.1k words))

🌸

to put it simply, poppy’s day was going to shit.

she was a) still sleepy, despite it being three in the afternoon, b) having cramps (blech), and c) was a spazzy asshole as per her usual attitude. it only got worse when she accidently knocks into princess mallory in the halls. “oh my god, i’m so sorry!”

mallory whips around with a scowl. “watch it!”

“my bad, dude. are you okay? not like… injured or anything?” that was her first mistake.

mallory stares at her. poppy can practically see the ice forming in her eyes. “i am not a dude.”

“sorry, would you prefer “bro”? or “homeboy,” perhaps?” poppy asks her sarcastically. second mistake.

she haughtily lifts her head. “how about highness,” she says coolly.

“i feel like “highness” tends to belong to people who are actually polite.” the frost in her voice equally matches mal’s. third mistake.

“you've just met me and i'm the one who's impolite?”

“i mean, your answer to me saying sorry was ‘watch where you’re going’, so… yeah, you are.”

“i believe i said 'watch it'.” god, she’s so snooty; it’s like she’s never met a person below her caste in her life.

“either way. besides, i’ve heard the horror stories from other selected about meeting you.” it’s not a lie- most of them are either a little frightened by their interactions with her or are just pissed that she hasn’t given anyone a chance to prove her wrong.

“aw, are the reigning rejects scared of me?” a taunt stains her tone. she wants to get a rise out of poppy- it’s obvious by her continuation of a bullshit conversation.

poppy pretends to ponder for a moment, trying to think of something that might throw her off. “i feel like “pissed off” might be a better term for it. or possibly “curious.””

mal shrugs. “boo hoo.” damn, nothing gets past that wall of bullshit.

she comes up with something that could be the exact ammo she needs.  “why are you so angry?” that was her fourth mistake.

mallory pauses, taken aback. “w-wha- excuse me?”

perfect, says her internal monologue. her external monologue calls for a shrug and a sarcastically therapist-esque tone. “i dunno if it’s predisposition or what,” she starts, faking sympathy, “but clearly you have a lot of bottled up emotions in that pretty head of yours.”

mallory’s eyebrows shoot up. “what gives you the right to speak to me this way?” her facade has broken slightly, thin ice beginning to crack under pressure.

the dead eye contact with the princess gives her just enough courage to say, “nothing, really. i just think maybe someone should let you know that you can’t take out your emotions on other people.”

“are you trying to get sent home?” mal asks, frustration evident in her tone. she looks flustered. she obviously wasn’t expecting for one of the ‘reigning rejects’, as she put it so kindly, to call her out on her shit- in fact, she probably didn’t expect anyone to call her out on her shit.

“somehow i don’t think you have the power to do that.” she probably does according to some subclause article blah blah blah, but it never hurts to try.

snobbery has returned to her voice. “i can tell nate about your lack of respect for his dear little sister.”

poppy gestures past her dramatically. “be my guest,” she says, a challenge in her voice.

“watch me.” she bumps her way past poppy.

“have fun, my man!” clearly false cheeriness fills her voice as she returns to apparently masculine coded slang as a way to taunt mallory. god, i’m such a bitch.

mal spins back around and moves closer to poppy. “i am not your man!”

“see, this is what i’m talking about. if an itty bitty comment like that sets you off, you have far bigger problems than slang that most people consider gender neutral.”

“do you want something?” mal asks. she’s pissed- not new- and shaken up- definitely new. poppy’s never, ever seen her this off her game before. she’s a little pleased with herself for accomplishing this. her mother would call it schadenfreude- taking pleasure in others pain.

she shrugs. “not really. i’m just a massive bitch.” that’s the difference between them. poppy can admit when she’s in the wrong, just as she’s doing now, but mal is a whole other taco stand. she probably never thinks she’s in the wrong, as if she’s above morals and laws because she’s a one.

the lake has frozen back over, frostiness returning to her tone. “we're done here.”

“this has been a scintillating conversation.” poppy puts every bit of the very little happiness she has left into that one sentence, but she doesn’t mean it.

unfortunately, mallory can’t tell that. “no, it has not.” her voice is snippy.

with nothing but another shrug, poppy responds with a nonchalant, “everyone is entitled to their own opinions.”

with a frustrated shout, mallory leaves with nothing but a yelled goodbye. poppy calls after her. “see y’all later!” she waits until she’s mostly out of earshot to start cursing her out in every language she knows even a vague curse word in under her breath. she runs through the basics- scheise, shit, mierda, tonto del culo, futue te ipsi, cabra- before she goes through her mental file folder of welsh ones.

she returns to her room, giggling about her stupid welsh swears (and her possibly imminent elimination) and collapses on the bed right as caroline begins to make it. “are you fucking kidding me?” caroline says with a laugh.

“sorry, cariña. i had a shit show of a conversation today with princess drewgi today, wanna hear about it?”

caroline, having been forced to learn welsh swears with poppy two weeks ago, knows exactly what she’s saying and who she’s talking about. “please. i have no drama in my personal life.” poppy recounts the events for her, caroline laughing in the right places, saying burn right where it’s necessary, and generally just being her amazing, gorgeous self as per usual. “so long story short, if you were to fuck another guard, it probably wouldn’t be a big deal?”

poppy laughs. “no, probably not.”

“what about a maid?” while her mouth and eyes are still smiling, caroline’s voice has gone soft and serious.

poppy stares at her. “umm… i guess that would be okay too. why do you ask?”

caroline stares at her thoughtfully for a second before leaning and brushing her lips against poppy’s. she leans back before blurting out “aw, fuck, i’m sorry, i didn’t-” her voice is quickly cut off by poppy pulling her back in and smiling against her lips.

[commedias]

hello friends !! i am v v tired and emotionally distraught over the fact i was wrongfully terminated today but in more exciting news, this blog has officially turned ONE month old and i hit 200 followers today :-) thus, this calls for my first follow forever. i’ll also be prefacing it with a super cheesy blurb abt how much i love this blog and all of y’all, so buckle your seatbelts and get ready to go !!

when i started this blog, i had no idea i would experience this much joy from writing and interacting with all of you !! i had rp'ed in the past in groups, indie, and 1x1, but this was my first time really entering the krpc, or for those of you don't know korean roleplaying community. i remember using kpop fcs in groups and often being ignored for not using a lot of the mainstream fcs in american pop culture. now that i have this blog, i feel so #blessed to be able to interact with others who use kpop fcs and have high-quality writing as well !! on a more personal note, this blog has really helped me keep in touch with my writing and overall self. writing has always been difficult for me bc i felt like it was so time-consuming (not like i have anything else to do) and obligatory especially within the tumblr community, but all of you have been so patient while i dealt with irl problems such as work and college !! as a result, it really encourages me to try my hardest and push myself as a writer to reply as efficiently as possible. occupying myself like this has kept my mind off of other things going in my life in a way that my own personal writing outside of tumblr couldn't do. it always took me back to the dark place where i was alerady at, a lot of relating to my own personal experiences. now i'm ngl, there's some self-insert here and there with my characters. wooyoung was created to help me sort out my alcoholc tendencies. but the stories themselves take on an entirely new light, your muses helping mine develop into BETTER characters and people overall. being able to create this growth not only encourages me as a writer, but as a person as well. i personally connect with my characters a lot even if they lead different lives than me and care for them as if they were real. even if i'm not always the strongest for myself, knowing that i have my muses, our threads, and a loving community keeps me grounded. i don't rly have many other ppl in my life, so to have the krpc supporting and interacting with me has given me the boost i need. thank you all so much for that. now onto the more fun stuff !!

@chimxrical​: although i touched upon it briefly in my other positivity post, you've helped both me and hongbin grow so much. ours was the first thread to truly grab me and push me beyond the standard threads that die out or don't grow very much. you always replied so quickly and it rly made me excited to see how interested you were in our thread as well. i never expected hongbin to grow to as much as he has thus far, only the construct "sugar daddy politician" in my mind when i first conceived him. he had an icy air as part of his job that i myself even couldn't penetrate through at first without meifen warming up to him. his interactions with her really unveiled to me the more intimate layers of his character, that he had a lot of pain and tenderness going on beyond his work. that he didn't always have to be as tough as his work made him, that it was okay for him to dive into the softer dimensions of his personality. i didn't go into hongbin x meifen with all the details that we know about him know like his schizophrenic mother and his strong notions of justice and making the world a better place. but the more he interacted with meifen, the more insight i began to gain into who he was and how deeply his details connected with me. hongbin and meifen's (and don't forget kyungri's) headcanons have always brought joy to me and i love thinking of how far hongbin and meifen will get together the more that our thread develops. and for you as a mun, you've always been SO patient and supportive. whenever i have questions or just want to share something with you, you welcome me with open arms. you have such a kind heart and it shows through all of your characters. thank you for always being there and your wonderful replies to our threads <3

@cxrrvptvs​: omg where do i begin ?? i love stanning exo with you and internally screaming over all of the angst between taeyong and jinwoo and all the fluff between sunghyun and dohyun. our muses just love each other very much and it's one of the best things that's happened like ?? your replies are always on point and i love all of your muses. you portray them so amazingly and i love it whenever you add a new one !! your threads with other ppl are so fun to read too tho i do kind of side eye like taeyong's jealous ass would but it's all good bc that's how multi-muse shipping works :-) hands down one of my favorite ppl to roleplay with and i can't wait to have a million more threads with you !!

@justlysts​: ahhh what a beautiful child (even tho you're older than me) i know i'm trash at replying to im's and just distance myself from ppl in general, but don't ever think you can't come tell me about your life. i know today you were salty abt those ppl you had to talk to for the concert tickets, but in any other case when u wanna talk lmao !! i don't have a job now so i'll have plenty of time to listen :-) appreciate yourself more bc i love your aesthetic and ur cute hair and korean styles. you have such a cute personality and i love u sending me a million guys to rate. i can tell you're going to go far in life as cliche as that sounds and i'm down to support you in whatever you decide to do.

@sekairph​: we've only known each other for a short time but we already fangirl over exo and wooyoung x kiara together and it's so wonderful. i love how much work you put into tumblr from your replies to your resources as a rph and your content is always on point !! i remember when u first messaged me and called me out for how much i reblog you like i honestly didn't even know i was reblogging all of it from you i'm just exo trash rip. your writing is so good and i love hearing insight on kiara with each reply, not strictly limiting into dialogue. our characters have sm natural chemistry and the plot we selected was so bomb like ?? you're so sweet and i wish you all the best and that you'll dream sweet dreams of sehun the next time you sleep. i can't wait to plot more in the future and see where kiara and wooyoung go !! his personality has really started to take more shape around her since i rly didn't know what i was doing with him at first lmao and it's helped me so much with his character so thank you for that :-)

@paidsoul​: honestly the realest person out here in this blue hell. even tho tumblr is a sensitive place, i appreciate how honest and firm you are in your convictions and don't make up bs excuses to get out of uncomfortable situations. idk i'm not articulating this the best, but i like how upfront you are rather than following the typical tumblr etiquette of "oh sorry love ahaha :-)!" and shit like that, ya feel ?? your muses' backstories always run me over with a bulldozer but like they're so good and well-thought out ?? like your angst has reasoning behind it rather than the tortured artist with no parents who gets drunk and paints a tree and thinks he's a fuckin rembrandt smh... ANYWAYS thank you for all the inspiration (sounds cliche, i guess life advice) you've given me and i'll take it to heart since someone needs to get thru to my problematic ass. i can't wait to get know you more as a person and also interact thru our threads and have lots of angst together !! also thanks for getting me into the supernatural vibe like fuck i love yanny so much already and deadass i'll probably add more spn muses in the future like a mermaid lmao or MAYBE a demon so i can have heart-wrenching backstories like you (tho i mean my human muses have some angst too like sunghyun and his dead mother) and make myself and partners in threads emotionally distraught.

@sxvrn​: okay side note i could have SWORE in our messages u told me your new url was supposed to be like based off 'salvation' but that the original url u thought of started a v or something and looked nothing like salvation lmao bc that's how i feel rn abt your url like i had to copy and paste it but i'm just HAPPY i found your new blog bc i never wanna lose our threads </3 continuing on that tho, i don't see it in my messages now tho and i checked both on mobile and the computer and all it says that you were worried abt changing it bc ppl might not find you but nothing's showing up about the salvation thing so i'm like mandela effect ?? ANYWAYS i'm happy i found your new blog so i could tag you in this (not so) little thing. i live for youngjae's problematic ass messing with sweet lil minsoo, as i've said at least a billion times before. a lot of this would probably be rehashing what i said in my last positivity post about you but idk you're just great ?? like bless you for not sleeping on kim minseok and keeping kuhn as a muse you are a good human being. whenever you post a starter in the tags, i'm always lurking on it like even before we starting talking ooc i kept reading them and thinking who is this amazingly creative person ?? i can't wait to see how your new blog and muses unfolds and i hope that you got over your case of writer's block !!

@grcviity​: i used to think snap threads were boring and then you happened and i'm obsessed now *exo voice* someone call the doctor. thank you for your quality snaps and using kihyun monsta x is gonna rise one of these days i tell you. i'm curious to see how our characters interact outside of snap lmao, but i'm sure it will be just as good, if not better. your muses are so god damn cute and so are you <3

@stcrgirls​: ayyy your personality is just so fun and so is yeuna tbh !! your replies are always a joy to read and kihyun and yeuna hit home with those feels omg. thanks for letting me tell u abt my college orientation and the lyft driver who i got into ko ko bop !! keep reppin' us pinays, girl, and btw that reminds me you're so pretty like who are you omg ?? your munday selfies were on point i was like damn girl you're mestizo. both pretty inside and out, i wish you all the best and can't wait to see how our threads grow together !!

ok so we're not here all night, here's some other lil cuties i wanted to give a shout-out to: @quietuptownx, @powerpuffs, @licnhrts, @mujehan,​ @ofwildblossoms, @dearcherryblossoms, @liquoidtears, @pxlimpsest, @rosevined, @niqhtowls, @slideivy, @realizcation, @bcrmuda, @likewinter, @honeyedsins, @shrinemade, @findmexsaveme, @flxrvl, @lawsqwad, @landrogynous, @blazedfires, @pvxilatc, @cacotheisms, @pinkbvbblegvm, @simpaticos, @tearedrops, @undersunrise, @lustrcvs, @fckxillusion, @fckfanxychild,

thank you once again to EVERYONE who made this possible, who continually supported me and waited for my turtle speed replies. thank you to mutuals who i don't talk to yet, but would love to. and even if i haven't followed you back, thank you a million times over. seeing my blog grow has gotten me so excited and given me some of my kick back in life (lmao i'm sixteen for god's sake not like my life's ending already) both as a writer as a person. honestly you all are the best for putting up with all of my exo spam and mun rants. thank you for all of the ask memes and love y'all send me regularly it means the world to me. i can't wait to see where this blog goes and meet even more friends :-)

[buckybarnesappreciationsociety]

“Coffee and Brooklyn” Part 2

Summary: Bucky and Y/N’s friendship is slowly graduating from hot dogs and Cokes, to dimly lit restaurant dinners and cuddle sessions at her brownstone. One thing caused concern for Y/N, she hasn’t met the team. It was time to have a lengthy conversation with her beau about this. She didn’t want to feel he was ashamed to introduce her to everyone because of the color of her skin.

 Words: 1,626

 Warnings: Swearing & Racial Conversations

 Pairing: Bucky x Black Reader

 A/N: I’m overwhelmed and grateful for the kind and encouraging feedback. Thank you for reading the story. I had so much fun writing both parts. I don’t wanna push the envelope and do another part, but I’d love to delve deeper into their relationship. Sprinkle it with a little angst.  Anywho, love y’all and thanks again for reading.

A special “thank you” to @omalleysgirl22 and @vvintersouldier, my remarkable betas.

________________________________________________________________

 At the worst possible moment, Mother Nature decided to throw a temper tantrum. Blinding rain, vivid lightning, and roaring thunder. Y/N and Bucky wanted to check out “Dinner and a Movie.,” a new theater offering delicious delicacies; hot wings, sub sandwiches and ice cold beer, all while enjoying a movie in reclining chairs. But much to their dismay, the weather didn’t cooperate.

 Instead, Y/N opted for homemade Jamaican cuisine for Bucky. He absolutely loved her cooking. She introduced his palette to Southern, Indian and Jamaican fare. And the cherry on top, her cakes and pies rivaled those created by world class bakers. Bucky almost ate a whole chocolate cake! Of course, he’d have to train harder to work off the calories!

 After dinner, Bucky cleaned the kitchen. It was the least he could do after such a delectable meal. But, he felt something was off with his best girl.

 Y/N knew Bucky lived at Stark Tower but he’d never invited her to meet everyone else. Truth be told, he wanted to but his nerves got the better of him. This proved to be a major roadblock and needed to be addressed. They agreed to discuss everything, whether it’s negative or positive. That was a stipulation for their relationship. Keep nothing bottled up!

 “Bucky, we need to talk. Something’s eating me from the inside out.”

 His face dropped instantly, uncertain of what was coming.

“Yeah, Doll, what is it?”

 “Why haven’t I met the team? We’ve been together for 3 months and I have yet to set foot in Stark Tower. Is it a problem about my race? Are you ashamed of me?

 “Geez baby face, ain’t no way I’d ever be ashamed to show ya off. Look at’cha. I’m a lucky man. I’m scared someone’s gonna say something stupid to hurt ya feelings.”

 “Babe, if we’re going to continue what we have between us, at some point, meeting the team is inevitable. Don’t worry about what they say. You and I have a special bond; smart ass comments won’t break us. Sweetie, we’ve been out together, heard nasty comments, and laughed at their ignorance. We’ll do the same if any of your colleagues have a negative reaction. But I’m not gonna promise I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

 **********

Bucky agreed to take Y/N to Tony’s Friday night soiree. There wasn’t a dress code, no fancy duds. Just the team hanging out, eating and drinking.

 “What if they don’t like me Bucky?”

 “How could they not? You’re one hellua woman and I’m so glad to have ya in my life.

“And I’m a very fortunate woman to have you in mine.”

 ***********

The elevator ride went on forever. Y/N’s palms were sweating. Bucky pulled her close to his chest and laid a searing kiss on her lips.

 “Calm down sugar. Everything’s gonna be just fine. You’ll see.”

 Y/N wasn’t a self conscious person, but meeting the Avengers  had her stomach in knots.

 **********

Bucky and Y/N stepped from the elevator hand in hand. Nat, Steve and Wanda were sitting at the rooftop bar, engaged in heavy conversation with Tony. Everyone stopped talking and focused their attention on them .

 Sam stopped drinking. He couldn’t believe his eyes. A fine black woman with James Buchanan Barnes. How in the hell did that happen?

 “Hey everyone, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is Wanda, Nat, Tony and that louse over there is Steve. At the bar is Tony and Vision. And that’s Sam.”

 “Hello everyone. It’s really good to finally meet you. I’ve heard so much about the Avengers. Good to put a face with the name.”

Everyone was welcoming, except Steve. Wanda and Nat liked Y/N immediately. They pulled her aside for some food, drinks and girl talk.

 “Hey Frosty, look at you. Growing up to be a big boy.” Tony quipped, looking over his shades. “Are you sure she wants to be with you?”

Bucky retorted, “Yes Tin Man, she does.”

 Steve didn’t comment right away. He remained quiet and Bucky didn’t understand why.

********** 

The night’s unexpected remarks came from Sam. “Barnes, how in the hell did you get a fly ass “sister” like that? Damn, I can’t believe she’s with you! Beauty and the Beast!”

 By now, Y/N had returned to Bucky’s side with a drink in her hand. She caught the end of Sam’s remarks and sprang into action.

 “Excuse me Sam, you’re way out of line. First of all, you need to move past our skin color. I’d rather be with a white man with manners and decency, than a black man with a big mouth and thinks he’s got it going on.”

 “Furthermore, YOU of all people should know what it’s like to be an African American in today’s society. There’s no need to rundown the statistics because you’ve lived it first hand. James and I care very deeply for each other and have witnessed racism for ourselves because we’re together.”

 By now, Y/N was shedding tears and Bucky was furious, but he didn’t interfere.

“Maybe you’re joking and maybe you’re not. But let’s get on damn thing straight from the get go. I’m with him, he’s with me, we ain’t going to stop just because someone’s too ignorant to move past color and go straight for the heart. You’ll be seeing a lot of me so, let’s try to along or I will go straight Brooklyn on dat ass. Feel me?”

 All Sam could do was swallow hard and nod. He could tell this was a sore subject for Y/N and should’ve kept his snarky comment to himself. An apology was definitely coming to her AND Bucky!

 Y/N wiped her face and embraced Bucky tight. He kissed the top of her head.

“Dollface, remind me not to piss you off. The way you handled Bird Man was a thing of beauty.”

 “No problem. I’ve gone through bullshit my teenage and adult life because I prefer to date outside of my race. Bitter ass, insecure black men need to shut the fuck up and allow us to date who we choose.

 Y/N stood on her tiptoes and placed a kiss on Bucky’s lips. He returned the gesture.

 Bucky turned to get some food and a drink. “Hey babe, can I  get you something?

 “Not right now. I need to speak to Steve. I’ll fill you in later.”

 “Okay. Don’t be too long ‘cuz Imma miss ya.”

 “James Buchanan Barnes, go! I’ll be right back in a few minutes!”

 ***********

Steve was standing near the banister overlooking the bright lights of New York City. Y/N stood beside him and laid her hand on his shoulder.

 “Hey Cap. You’re awfully quiet. Everything okay?”

 “Yeah, s’okay. Just thinking about you and Buck.”

 “What about us?”

 “You may or may not know  that  he’s been through hell and back. The world can be a really cruel place about mixed relationships. Hell, in my day, you’d both be killed.”

 Y/N looked directly into his deep blue eyes and spoke.

 “Steve, I’m living African American history. I was adopted and my parents were white. My gosh, I’ve been spit on and bullied relentlessly. Also, I know all there is to know about Bucky. Every horrific act HYDRA forced him to commit; including Tony’s parents, Wakanda, removal of the trigger words, the nightmares. It doesn’t matter to me, Cap. I’m with Bucky because he’s a good man worthy of love and happiness.”

 Steve had compassion in his eyes. “M’sorry he’s the only family I have left. Don’t want’im to get hurt s’all.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “But, I can see  you’re good for him and I’m happy for ya.”

 Looking lovingly at Bucky, Y/N replied “He’s good for me too Cap.”

Bucky came over and kissed his best gal and Steve shook his hand.

 “M’happy for ya Buck. Treat her right.”

 “Thanks man. I will treat this Brooklyn girl right. Can’t turn back now. I’m in too deep.”

 “WHAT?! BROOKLYN?!” Steve’s eyes almost bulged out of their sockets.

 “Yep, born and raised. Jamaica Ave.,” Y/N beamed.

 Steve emitted a hearty laugh, “Yeah Buck, you’ve got a real firecracker. We’re gonna have to sit down and really get acquainted darlin’.”

 “I’d love that, Steve.”

 “C’mon doll, let’s join the others. M’sure they wanna talk to ya some more.”

 **********

Bucky and Y/N sat on the deck chatting with Nat, Wanda and Tony. As promised, Sam apologized and all was forgiven.

 You could see the pride and adoration on Bucky’s face as Y/N interacted with his teammates.

 Tony turned up the wisecracks and music, Thor made an appearance and brought Asgard mead.

 The mood was jovial and light. In that moment, skin color wasn’t an issue. And to think it began with coffee, a chocolate chip muffin, and Brooklyn.

  TAGS: @erisjade @omalleysgirl22 @vvintersouldier @gaybybirth @goody2shoessmut @goodnightwife @gingerbatchwife @supersoldierslover @this-kitty-has-claws @sgtjamesbuchananbarnes107th @theimpossibleg1rl @cant-stop-the-fandoms @amrita31199 @anbanananna @opaque-daydream @readerwinterbarnes @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @justareader @bolontiku @thewinterswimmer @senselesssamii @the-witching-hours12-3 @flirtswithdanger @the-girl-without-a-face @soldatbarnes @mcuimxgine @promarvelfangirl @marvelous-imagining @eve1978 @a-tale-of-two-comics @sebbybooks @not-moose-one-shots @james-bionic-barnes @buckysmetallicstump @tatortot2701 @jezzula @nenyakj 

@kenobi-and-barnes @nateheywvood @iwillbeinmynest

[askkav-archived]

I’ve Noticed A Thing

Recently - but seeing as I've only been active within this community (ask/rp blogs) for a while comparative to others, at times I feel as though I don’t have some sort of authority to speak about it.

Then I realized, after a second, I don’t care and I’m going to speak my mind.

And let’s get down to it; to the talk - THE talk about OC vs Canon, popularity, activity and your feelings!

Hi, I’m Kav and this is my own OC blog - with about 200 followers (as of right now, writing this) and have had this blog for about 2 months and a few days. Apparently that is a feat in this community, but I think I should point out that it’s possibility due to my activity, my art and also the guest that’s currently been hanging out with them.

And I need to point out something right now but don’t be offended/hurt. etc; it’s just an obvious thing.

Canon blogs will get the better treatment because they're established characters in this world AND have that spotlight that original content creators don't have.

But that shouldn't diminish one's determination to keep at it. People are not going to hand serve you the attention you think you rightfully deserve Because you think so well of yourself, which I'm not saying it's a bad thing but still.

Don't let that bruise your ego or your spirit. (Because god, if that does it - then you’ll just be meeting people along the way who’ll do a lot worse and say worse.)

Anyways let that sink in a little and now, what do you do as an original content creator or an OC ask blog?

There’s not much to say besides don’t give up! Don’t lose all of your hope because seriously, it’s well established that no one really wants to deal with a person who gives up hope and complains or is negative on a constant basis. (*Looks at self*)

Like myself, you need to work on that - that part of yourself that needs to start looking more of positives and other options, instead of being down or thinking negatively. People can sense it and they’ll start leaving. 

Oh, you can say, ‘I didn’t need them anyhow’ or ‘I’ll find better fans or followers than those’ but really, stop making that excuse for yourself to feel better.

You lost them because of that sort of thinking.

Do better! Be better, not only for others but for yourself! As a content creator and someone who wants to have more interaction with others about your content! Don’t dismiss everyone because you feel like you are not good enough or you’re too proud or possibly anxious/shy. (I sound like I’m preaching to myself at this point...)

Also another elephant in the room; Art-based Ask/RP blogs vs Written-Only Ask/RP blogs

I hate to talk about this but let’s just be real; ask blogs - and ones where there’s constant activity and art alongside it, will always have more popularity.

Words are so beautiful, and strung along together - they can be amazing and well thought out ideas, stories and much more but... As they say, pictures write a thousand words.

It’s true and I feel bad for admitting that, as an ask blog - I’m not going to feel the same feeling as an RP blog because I don’t have the same frustration you have. I love your words and the image you can provide with them but it’s not for everyone.

It’s kind of tragic because so far, what I have seen and read - or at least skimmed through, the majority of those I follow are pretty great and incredible!

Please, don’t give up hope though - you’ve met some pretty cool friends and people who love you, either up front or afar! (Like me! And I love you, your portrayals and your blog in general)

Major vs minor characters and attractiveness

Not gonna lie; characters who are mains and have a huge role within a series will get more love and more attention - Also will get bashed too, for not having the right portrayal or the same headcanons as another. Keep doing whatever you wish, you’re good by the way.

But minor characters, that is somewhat tough - they needed to have a following, a fan base but they also can start attracting attention by being constantly active, possibly in character for most or some or just giving MORE to the character in question.

I’ve seen it happens and it’s pretty great! Some feel as though the captured the character even though there is so little information of them as it is. You’re amazing and are doing god or at least the level of the author’s work if they worked more on the character.

Not gonna lie either; physically attractive characters will always just get the glory and the good(?) asks - It’s just how the world works but please know, don’t let that put you down (or go make an ask blog for a possibly popular character for being attractive unless your heart is into it or else you’ll lose passion quickly for your own blog and really hurt others in the process because they always want more!)

Art styles and skills

I don’t really need to go on; people are attracted to dynamic and possibly (what they believe) is art styles that they are attracted, aesthetically, to or want to see more or.

It’s shallow and not at the same time - artists grow from learning from one another and wanting to achieve the same skills or skill level as those they place above them.

Don’t let that bring you down, keep practicing though. Keep drawing. Don’t stop either or lose hope, just keep at it. You’ll get where you wanna be! Practice and practice some more, look to tutorials, different brushes/pens/tools and whatever resources you can get over the internet to help you. 

Art is a skill you yourself have to hone and keep at - as Arin Hanson says from Game Grumps, “Do you think I came out the pussy drawing Mozart?”

I know this post is just a whole mess; but I haven’t really done this in a while - I’m pretty rusty and can’t really be sure to keep this post about the point as much. I apologize for so.

And now I need to ask you, why do you do this?

I’m not trying to be or act as though I’m an authority of what you should feel or think or a judgment of your thought process, etc etc - I’m just here, trying to level with y’all. WHY DO YOU DO THIS?

Seriously, you need to ask yourself this.

I’ll give you my reason for doing this, for having an OC ask blog - my thoughts and what goes through it.

I do and continue to do this because I have always wanted to do this for the past couple of years but the problem was also me and what I was thinking, you see - I wasn’t at the skill level I wanted to be at, the last couple of years,  to start portraying and putting out my own (very self-indulgent) self insert in this world.

And when the time came and I understood what my character was about, what were their goals, their intent and I was sure how to go about them - and that my art style was good enough for me to show them off in.

I made this blog though I’m still new to this and I’m still unsure which version I want to keep Kav as too - but I’m still happy with it, so far.

I get frustrated too because at times, I can’t still properly give details to what goes on in my head - it’s always been a struggle to put thought and ideas down into art, whether digitally or paper. Written or drawn.

But I’m going to continue this, whether I have 1 follower to over a 100+ followers. I’m not going to change either because I’m comfortable at this pace, at this level and what I’m putting out as it is - whether sfw or not.

I’ve grown to know that, I’m not for everyone and I need to keep reminding myself of this - a lot more than I let on. Granted, my need for validation and attention really puts me in the wringer but- *slaps self* - I need to keep trying and be active and keep going because if I stop now, I won’t forgive myself.

Kav, my character, as fictional as they are - won’t let me forgive myself for giving up when I know people out there, before this blog and letting people get to me, that they love her. Maybe more than I do, maybe not as much but they still love/like and appreciate her for existing!

She provides people with a sense of... strength; she gives people the drive and determination to put out their own content, whether OCs or self-inserts and for that. God I’m going to keep this up.

You should too.

But for whatever sakes you believe in, don’t give up! Don’t give in to that fucking bullshit that you are not good enough for all these people! Because if you think you deserve a bit of, what, attention or some other reason! Then keep doing this, keep being active, keep putting out more content, whether drawn or written out there because someone else, someone out there will love you and your character!

Doing nothing but feeling sorry for yourself or some bullshit isn’t going to do just that.

Though this is from my opinion and my standpoint but if you create a blog, more specifically an ask or RP blog hoping for popularity and followers - Well, I’m sorry to say but doing this for something like that won’t turn out to what you hoped.

And you’ll either grow tired or dislike for the whole thing and seeing that; isn’t always fun for everyone else when you decide dropping the character because you lost the passion or muse on account of not enough attention and the like.

If you’re in this, be really into your role - But also don’t let it consume you as well, update about things you feel important and be more open to your fanbase if you have any to your thoughts. It’s just easier.

Anyways I’m done, thank you all for taking the time to read this. Stay cool.

[puttputtpity-blog]

Any one remember Donnie from Wild Thornberrys?

Yeah, I met him. 

I should mention I’m not particularly fawn of children. By particularly, I mean hella. Like, they creep me out and make me nervous. They smell weird, make noises, are loud, like ????????????? What the hell is that??? It’s probably due to me being the 2nd youngest out of all my siblings, and only by like, a year. And I also grew up super isolated and I guess I never got to interact with other kids to figure out all that shit. 

Spoiler: I still have no desire to try and communicate with these gremlins.

I don’t even think you guys understand how bad I am with kids. I’m already awkward okay. Then here comes these mini drunk people babbling incoherently while the mom encourages them.

 Bitch, I ain’t taking time out of my day to try and decipher your hob-goblins gargling, scratch record speech. Because frankly, I don’t care. Like, I try okay? Once. I’ll try once then after that I’m out bitches. Nothing good can possibly come from something that sticks its hands down its pants, scratches its ass, picks its nose, then shoves its hand in its mouth.

Now will I slap a kid? Absolutely not. But if I see one fall, I sure as hell ain’t running to help it. Honestly though, like, you tell me your kid is in 5th grade, I will understand nothing. 

What age is that??????

Does it know how to talk????

How smart is it???

Can it use the bathroom by itself???

Do you have to walk it on a harness???? 

Like,....The fuck does that mean?????????

Now, my job means I have to sometimes interact with these ovarian spawns. 

Whatever, that’s fine. It’s typically them just saying a number. Some are actually pretty well mannered and all that. Most are shy and don’t say anything. So, in short, tolerable. Hell, some are even kinda fun to talk to. 

HOWEVER. As I mentioned above, I met Donnie from the Thornberrys. These 3 kids come through, 2 boys (Big and little brother, and a sister) I guess they were like,,...5???? 6??????? Idk?????? Small????? My guess is like, 4 years for the sister, 5 for the little brother, and like,...6 maybe for the big brother??? The fuck I know.  

Now, this day I was working with a guy, we’re gonna call him C. C came in around 4:30 to help me work night shift. (I worked 12-9) We bonded over the fact we are both shit with dealing with these sperm slip ups. As if God above heard us, here come the kids. Now, I knew the girl that was with them, Gonna call her Lo. However, I didn’t say anything to her because I’m an antisocial shit that hates everyone. 

But, But, BUT,........the first thing these children do is come banging on the damn door. Fuck you gremlin, we have a window. 3 actually. Damn. But none the less, we open it. Smallest of the shits shove past and starts trying to touch everything. 

Excuse me child, but what the frick frack, putt putt, butt fuck do you think you’re doing? 

So we finally get him out and the girl is just like, lol he do that sometimes. 

Well, maybe my foot sometimes slips right up your ass? Come get this thing. (Is it a good time to mention I’m a salty person?) We get them the damn balls and all that good jazz and they head out. Now, they come back, the little one does. This kid doesn’t know how the fuck to speak apparently. Literally, mumbling and pointing at random shit and I just?????? Why the hell are you like this??? Did your mother not slap you and tell you to speak up? Mine did?? 

He leaves again after I nudge him out and close the door. (And Lock it cause he just flung the door open and came right on it, rude spawn) So, they get to the last window and they, like many other uterus expulsions, are amazed at the ball drop pipe. (It’s typical for them to want the ball back to do it again when we explain how it works, but we try and ask them not to stick their hand down there since last year, apparently, a kid almost got his hand stuck.) So, unlike most kids who are like, “Where did the ball go????” and us simply explaining there’s a pipe, then letting them drop it again through the hole, then they leave, these little shits start SCREAMING, “WHERE DID IT GO??? HOW DID IT DO IT? HOW? TELL.” 

Bitch. Chill the fuck out you sim creation reject. We explain over their screeches and they continued with, “GIVE IT. GIVE BALL, GIVE.” I’ll give you these hands son. So we give it and they drop it again and leave the putt putt area a little after that. So, I go to use the bathroom okay. I come back and C is not amused. Apparently, the youngest had come back to the last window and stuck a hand through, holding a  melting ice cream (it was all over his arm) and was like, “Help, my ice cream is falling.” So C is like, “???? Uh, take it back outside??? I can’t help you???” And the kid just keeps trying to hand it to him while dripping ice cream everywhere. C is like, “PLeASe? SToP?” And finally his brother ran up, snatched it, and just chucked it towards the nearest trashcan. 

We are not done ladies and gents. 

The oldest bro comes back from the bathroom a little while later and he just leans into the last window and stares at us. (The fuck up with kids and staring?) So Me and C are like, ??? What? And this egg goes, “I went to the bathroom.” Okay????? We kinda just look at each other and then just say, “Good job???” THIS LITTLE SHIT JUST GOES, “I ain’t done yet.” 

????????????!!!!!! BITCH COME AGAIN? YOU RIGHT OVER THE HOLE THAT LEADS IN HERE. WHAT THE FUCK. YOU BETTER NOT.

So, it just keeps staring at us like we know what he’s talking about, so finally I quietly go, “You’re not done....playing?” He just nods and is like, “Yeah, wanna play golf.” JESUS CHRIST KID, THE HELL. IF IT WASN’T YOU SHITTING, IT WAS ME CAUSE YOU SCARED THE SHIT RIGHT OUT OF ME. Whatever though, I hand him the shit. He looks at the club and is like, “No, just ball.” 

NOW Y’ALL. Remember how I went out and bought new golf balls with my own money? I was not excited about the aspect of handing this thing a ball, considering it would probably run off with it. But it’s my job, so fine. Donnie Thornberry has come over now, and he wants one too. Fuck me. Whatever. So I hand them white golf balls. “I want black.” 

Child. Fuck you. Take the damn ball. I tell him, “We don’t have black. We have white, 2 green, and a yellow.” 

“I want black.” 

Boi. 

We explain it 2 more times before he settles for yellow. 

WELL ALL THEY DO IS IMMEDIATELY DROP IT IN THE HOLE AND START SCREECHING AGAIN. 

At some point, mumbling mertle knocks on the door. This little turd was clever. It was a convincing knock, and sounded like one of the clean up crew workers knocking to clock out. 

We opened the door.

There it was. 

First thing it does and point out the ants on the side of the door frame. Good job. Then he starts mumbling incoherently, in child talk, that neither me or C know how to translate or speak. I ask, “Do...Do you want to play again??” SIMPLE YES OR NO ANSWER, AN OFFERING TO THIS HELL SPAWN TO GET HIM TO LEAVE. I get jack shit of an answer, as it continued to babble and barge on it. It went to the ball drop bucket and pulled it away, throwing the balls everywhere before taking one and trying to shove it back up the pipe. 

Where was the girl watching him at? Right outside the damn last window. So, now I decide to bring out my drama acting lessons, to pretend I give a fuck how she is. 

“Lo??? Is that you??? How are you?” 

“Omg hi!! I’m doing fine! I took them out to play a little today, you work here now?” 

No, obviously I’m a masochist who enjoys hurting myself through dealing with your burrowed responsibilities. Yes I work here. 

“Yeah! It’s a summer job til I get back to college. Speaking of the kids, you wanna get this one?” 

“What’s he doing?”

Bitch, just come get him, what the fuck. It’s in my shack. 

“Uh, well, he’s sticking his hand up the pipe and he might get his hand stuck, we had someone do it last year.” 

“Oh! Just smack him.”

MOTHER FUCKER i CAN’T JUST HIT YOUR KID???? AS MUCH AS I DON’T LIKE KIDS, I AIN’T GONNA HIT IT?

I tell her, “Uh, I can’t, I don’t wanna lose my job.” 

“Oh, kay, I got him, just gotta smack him and tell him to leave.” Sure enough she leans over and bops him on the head while telling him to get out. Out he goes. Lock door again. 

AND THANK GOD THEY LEFT SHORTLY AFTER. 

Quoting C here, “Most people would assume if you worked here, you’d get nervous around the druggies, the pedo’s, snakes, whatever. No. It’s the kids.” 

PEOPLE PLEASE CONTAIN YOUR CHILDREN? THE FUCK?

[yukithesnowman314]

Disclaimer: Possible spelling and grammar error below I’m just knocking this out of my way so I can work on this Hi-Score Girl review.

Round 1: https://yukithesnowman.com/2018/05/15/yukis-path-to-doki-doki-literature-clubs-good-ending-round-1-sayori/

Continuing from where I left off, I was able to obtain the CGs for Sayori’s route in order to unlock the true ending.  Re-playing her route gave me a new insight into her accurate portrayal of people suffering from depression (such as feeling numb, hopelessness, lack of desire, etc.) made me appreciate her character. I want to see more educated takes of characters struggling with mental health in fiction –because done right, it can hit hard.

Since I’ve “completed ” Sayori’s route, I’m going after Natsuki’s next.  I haven’t done her route since my first run through, which is perfect given I need to go through her route before replaying Yuri’s.  Going through Yuri’s route in Act 1 requires me to witness Sayori’s death scene; therefore ruining my plans to get the game’s true ending.

For cut down on time, any previous read dialogues are being skipped unless I find something interesting and worthy of being talked about.

I like Natsuki. She’s slowly becoming a favorite character of mines. I’ve said this many times, but I hate the tsundere trope in anime – unless a writer puts realism to the trope (as we see with Natsuki).  She’s a “tsundere” but her aggressive, angry nature is a resulted of her being physically and emotionally abused by her father. It’s common for victims of child abuse to struggle with anger issues and develop an inferiority complex. Obviously, Natsuki hides her insecure nature (from the abuse) by acting tough and hard-hearted (but of course, she secretly cares about other people and don’t wanna see them down or hurt).

Playing Act 1 again, I couldn’t help but laugh at MC’s awareness of overused anime archetypes as Natsuki did her little “tsundere” bullshit such as “It’s isn’t like I did this for you” and hiding her love for cute things through acting hard and tough.  It almost made me forget that DDLC was a psychological horror VN.  Almost.  With that said, I can’t help but find some parts of my personality in her (as weird as it might sound).  There are some things I do enjoy that I’m kinda shy to admit (some moe’ blob anime like Lucky Star, classical music, reading about heart-warming stories , and shedding a tear or two at emotional scenes in anime to name a few).

…that’s as far as my softer side y’all gonna get from me.

Tsunsuki

The first night of the poem homework for Natsuki went smoothly.  And by smoothly, I cheated and save scummed because I accidentally got a few reactons from Yuri and Sayori that completely override my goal to have MC romance Natsuki.  Eh. I dunno what cute shit fictional girls like. Or real ones at that.  I suck at the romance thing.

After starting over I got MC to interact with Natsuki,.  There’s a hint for shadowing/mockery here as Natsuki talks about her favorite manga,“Parfait Girl” MC makes fun of the cover, which offends Natsuki telling him the old adage of never judging a book by its cover and how things may have more layers than it appears. A subtle jab at the true nature of the game.

I can’t help to think how Natsuki’s character mirrors that of the otaku. Otakus are quick to defend their passions – may they be anime, manga, gaming, etc.. Sometimes, they find inspiration in them (such as with Natsuki becoming a baker and a cook from reading her manga) and opening up to those who also share their passion. Natsuki struggles to share her love of manga with her friends. Every attempt has been met with ridicule by them (since they believe she’s still childish for not growing out of her manga phase).

I’m sure you guys had to deal with this in the past (maybe even today as adults for the older people reading this).  With nerd culture growing ever popular by the day the stereotype of nerds and anime fans being childish and immature is dying. The stigma is still there, but it wasn’t as bad as it was decades ago.

I was able to have MC make Natsuki fluttered with the poem with him writing something that matches her style.  Guess she’s not used to people appreciating and sharing her passion.  I know that feeling.  Doesn’t excuse her from acting goofy about it but I get it.  As Natsuki share her poem with Monika Monika tells MC how Natsuki’s writing style is similar to late author Shel Silverstein: “childish”, but with adult themes and straight to the point by using fewer words than necessary.  I like that lowkey.  I believe that you can say more by saying less and the more you talk and ramble, the less interesting you are to people.

Make people think about what you say and keep them in wonder by saying less.

Everything goes per normal so let’s skip ahead to Natsuki and Yuri’s fight.  Stated in an earlier post (I think, it’s been a while and I don’t feel like searching for it), I went to Yuri because she’s my favorite character and I like her character archetype, but for this one, I went for Natsuki.   She gets happy, proud that somebody like her childish, but blunt writing style.  Real shit,  I get her.  It gets annoying when people talk down about your style (without any advice to improve it, mind you).  When somebody sees the beauty of your style, it reminds you that it is not bad.

You do get a little egotistical, however.

Following the second poem writing,  there’s a funny scene where Natsuki  is struggling to get her manga collection from the top shelf of the clubroom’s closet.   Natsuki, dealing with her short complex, tries to reach for them but fails.  MC tries to help out, but couldn’t, as he was put in an awkward situation – either hold the step ladder  that Natsuki had (while innocently looking up her skirt), or let her fall in which she hits head hard against something, crack it open, bleed out and die; thus ending her route and the game .  The two fall down and shit scatters, with one of her manga being damaged.

(…okay so she didn’t fall to her death.)

Natsuki gets upset, snaps off on MC, but then starts to  cry, saying things like “I’m just having bad day” and “every day, it just gets harder”.  Subtle hints to Natsuki’s homelife and being abused by her dad.  Of course, you won’t catch it on your first run (unless you read the spoilers).  You assume that Natsuki acting childish or overreacting, not knowing that her acting out is a result of her stressful home life.  Over time, it’s going to take a toll on any child dealing with abuse.

There was an interesting theory I came across on a DDLC Facebook group months back that not only Natsuki’s dad belittles her for reading manga, it’s possible that he may have destroyed a few from her collections.   It’s not uncommon for abusive parents to destroy their children’s personal items. I have friends who during childhood, their parents would break their things as a form of “punishment”.

Natsuki could be hiding her manga at the clubroom to avoid any further damage from her dad.  Monika fucking with her collection adding to how horrible her home life is only fueled by Natsuki’s paranoia that she may lose her manga – her way out of reality for a little bit. Really wish Dan did more with Natsuki character.  There are layers about her that need to be explored.

Continued in  Round 2 Part 2.

(before I go I gotta say some of you Natsuki fans need Jesus)

Original Fangsta Natsuki Disclaimer: Possible spelling and grammar error below I’m just knocking this out of my way so I can work on this Hi-Score Girl review.