#I just keep repeating this is normal I’m doing this correctly im getting a good grade in coworker

[real-life-cloud]

text messages are scary …………………

[binunus]

college bf!rocky

a/n next is our rock and aegyo king sorry sanha park minhyuk !! also I was going to post this yesterday :( but me and my roommates got a little too lit for valentine’s and I literally sat for 7 hours straight in zoom so I couldn’t finish it until now but !! I hope you loves enjoy!!

→ genre: fluff, smut

→ word count: 4.9k

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alright aright alrightttt

we’re gonna switch it up a little bit

add a little flavor

because as much as I would love to say that college bf!astro all got their partners in a cute and smooth sailing way

we all know relationships aren’t that easy

but before we get into how you and rocky met

major: dance

are we surprised? no

rocky is a prodigy in dance

he’s been dancing since he could walk

he started choreographing at age 6

it just made sense for him, like even his parents were like go pursue dance, you’re not a law or business type of kid

he can master any type of dance from jazz, to ballet, to street, to contemporary, to tango, whatever you can think of

he’s roommates with music tech!jinjin

jin literally takes care of him all the time bc rocky??? when he comes back to the apt after dance practice?? dead weight

only passes his gen ed classes bc eunwoo tutors him

if it weren’t for the boys, rocky would literally live in the dance studio

they make sure to drag him out for fun and food at least once a week

or they join and keep him company while he’s practicing

have they gotten noise complaints before while messing around in the dance studio? yes

rocky is loud alright, especially when he’s with astro

he’s a perfectionist, literally will not leave the studio until he’s 100% satisfied with his progress

oh the amount of times myungjun and jin nag at him to take care of his health

now now

you’re also a dance major

people could say that you and rocky are the top two dancers of your year

gasp a rivals to lovers au??? you betcha baby

granted you switched into a dancer major your second year so rocky technically had seniority

but boom baby as soon as you made your appearance, it rocked his world

now im not saying rocky’s cocky bc obviously he’s a cute hardworking humble boy

but was he used to always being placed first in evaluations or getting the highest marks??? yeah

so the first time you placed first and he placed second??? it lit a bit of a fire in him

he’s seen a ton of good dancers in his time, but no one has ever matched his capabilities better than you

there was an unspoken rivalry between you two, everyone knew about it 

you both always wanted to upstage the other

there was always a tension whenever you two were in the same room

but like...have either of you ever really talked to each other besides side remarks in class?

no

and it didn’t really help that the whole dance department basically pit you up against each other to see who was really the best dancer of your year

so you and rocky never had the proper introduction to a friendship, it just went straight to rivalry 

and then came the announcements for the end of the year showcase

and instead of putting on a solo, the department chairs decided to have you and rocky perform a duet

and you’ve never worked with him before so you were dreading the first time you met up

you to your roommate: ugh i can’t believe im partnered up with rocky, that arrogant rude–

your roommate: have you ever even talked to him, y/n? he’s actually very nice

you: no...but that’s what he wants you to believe!

your ego sorta just went along with the whole thing

and rocky was 15 min late to your meeting bc he was out eating food with the guys so your patience?? very thin

literally as soon as he stepped into the dance studio, the air turned stuffy

rocky could feel you glaring at him and he just smirks?? 

rocky: did I make you wait long y/n?

you: yeah you did

he liked pushing your buttons?? idk he just felt satisfaction knowing that any small of action of his affected you that much

it made him feel like he was winning or whatever

and god it took literally forever for you two to decide on a song and genre of performance for the showcase

you wanted contemporary, he wanted ballet

you were literally disagreeing so much on it that you had to ask Siri to flip a coin

and then you fought and said that Siri was rigged when it chose tails (contemporary)

so you decided on a happy? mix of both

rocky at the end of your first meeting: i get that we’re not exactly friends, y/n, but we have to work together so let’s at least be professional

you: i can if you can

rocky: fine

you two literally bicker like five year olds on a playground

even the guys are like ???? why are you being so childish ???

you have 2 months of preparation until the showcase and you start meeting once a week for choreography and practice since given the assignment

you two are pretty civil for the most part, you make the contemporary parts and he makes the ballet parts and then you combine it when you meet up and see how it can incorporate and complement each other

there’s not much joking around ?? like you know how rocky’s a clown when he’s teaching astro choreography?? it’s not like that at all

and honestly you two are too caught up in your rivalry and tension to notice that your styles really match and highlight each other well??

there’s definitely a lot of “i could do this better than you” from both sides

i repeat: you are children

and then there’s this one practice where you and rocky are trying a pas de deux for the first time

(i literally looked this term up, it’s basically what jungkook and jimin from bts did during the 2020 mma black swan intro...if you haven’t seen it, watch it bc it is perfection mmm chefs kiss)

and you don’t know if it’s because you didn’t have enough momentum or rocky didn’t prep himself enough for the lift but he ends up dropping you and you both fall

and you both immediately start blaming each other for the mishap

until you lift your hand to point at him and it just hurts

it’s like a switch goes off, rocky’s immediately concerned and he’s like gently taking your hand like: holy shit are you okay??

you shake your head and you’re wincing whenever you try to move it

you: ow fuck rocky, I think it’s sprained

and he suddenly feels so guilty, like he goes silent

you: can we stop for today? I’m gonna go get this checked out, make sure it’s not broken

rocky: do you want me to go with you?

you: no. I’ll see you next week.

boy he feels so bad, he texts you throughout the course of the following week asking if you’re okay, asking your roommate if you’re okay, telling you he’s sorry that he dropped you

you didn’t respond much, not bc you felt weird texting him–well, you did a little bit shhh–but bc you were beating yourself up for getting injured a month before the showcase

you show up to practice the next week with your wrist in a compression bandage

and he doesn’t greet you with a quip like he usually does, he immediately grabs your wrist (gently) and he’s like inspecting the bandage

you: uh...the doctor said I should be careful with it for a week or two if i want it to heal faster. so don’t bitch at me if i’m not going all out

rocky: y/n...i’m so sorry...I didn’t mean to injure you, it was my fault that we didn’t execute the pas de deux

you just shrug: it was both our faults...if I didn’t fall on my wrist maybe we could have avoided this little obstacle

rocky: if I caught you correctly, you wouldn’t have even fallen

you: are we really arguing right now about this??

and then the two of you just laugh??? 

this is the first real pleasant interaction you’ve had with him

and you notice like wow rocky had a nice smile

you: i should be back to normal before the showcase so we should be fine

rocky: don’t push it though while we’re practicing alright? if your wrist starts hurting then stop, and don’t even think about doing any floor choreo

the atmosphere between you and rocky change after that

he becomes pretty concerned about your recovery–and maybe it’s bc he still blames himself for the cause of it

each night before your set practice days, he always shoots you a text asking how you’re feeling and how your wrist is doing

he brings ice packs, painkillers, and extra bandages during your practices just in case you need it

and you’re actually pretty touched by his concern

about two weeks before the showcase, your wrist is back to full movement and you’re like excited to actually practice to your best ability

from now on you see each other twice a week, just to get that detail and fine-tuning perfected

rocky’s still a bit hesitant to have you go full out but you reassure him that you’re fine

you both try the pas de deux again the day you take your bandage off 

and you can see that he’s nervous to try it

you: rocky, i’m fully healed now. we haven’t practiced this move since the first time and we need it in our routine

rocky: but...y/n, what if I drop you again??

you: you won’t...i trust you 

and you really did, that move requires a lot of trust between partners and you know? maybe it didn’t work out the first time because of the lack of trust between you two

and so you go through the full routine and rocky was holding his breath when that part of the choreography came up but you both successfully did it!! and it was a beautiful move

he was so excited at the end of the run through that he hugged you

and you were smiling too bc this was the first time you did a full run through without any stops in between

you both don’t even notice that all the hostility is gone??

and the tension suddenly changed from hatred to...dare I say it...sexual

oo baby the day of the showcase you two were hella nervous 

but c’mon you and rocky were the best of the best so ofc you absolutely killed the performance

your energies literally merged as soon as the music started

every move was flawless

and you both had to face each other during your ending pose and you were just like looking at him like ??? wtf ??? did you maybe wanna kiss him??

and you know the look that rocky has in his eyes when he’s dancing

imagine that literally piercing into your soul

you got the shivers waiting for the lights to dim 

you both received a standing ovation after your duet obviously

astro watching it bc they always support rocky: they’re gonna fuck 100%

fast forward to the next term bc you both didn’t really have a reason to contact each other during summer break now that the showcase was done

you and rocky had two classes together, dance research and advanced modern technique

it was then that you started to see his actual personality and how goofy of a person he was

you still had a rivalry of course, but now it was healthy

instead of trying to bring each other down, you both started motivating each other to do better

and yes you’ve always been impressed with how good of a dancer rocky was (and vice versa), but now whenever you saw him practice you start to feel a little bit of stir in your stomach and shit are you blushing??

and then you two get paired up again for your midterm evaluation

your teacher: i saw the chemistry you had for the showcase last term, i think you two would work well together for this project

and god is your teacher trying to murder you??? the theme of this midterm was “couple dance” to encourage collaboration or whatever

you were just thankful that the song choice she gave you was more upbeat and not sensual bc you know for a fact that you would not survive doing a sexy dance routine with rocky

but that didn’t stop the way your skin felt like it was on fire whenever he touched you for partner-dependent moves

this time around, you did the choreography process together and it was actually pretty fun??

you and him would bounce back ideas and joke around whenever something looked stupid

you and rocky did this by the way for reference

and then there was one late night when you two were practicing

it was around 2 am, no one else was in the music building and you both didn’t have class the next day so you two were just like fuck it let’s just practice until campus security kicks us out or whatever

you both were literally dancing for four hours, not just this new routine but old ones and freestyles as well

and then you were doing your new routine and during the part where he had to twirl and dip you, you both fall again

but no one got injured this time luckily

and you both just burst out laughing, maybe you were a little delirious at this point in the night

you: i can’t believe you dropped me again

rocky’s laughing and you both just look at each other, and he’s hovering above you right???

and your heart is beating so loudly in your chest you’re positive he can hear it

and you’re thankful that your face was already hot from dancing so that he couldn’t tell that you were in fact blushing

rocky’s like looking at you for a good minute or so and he’s just like thinking in his head: have you always been this cute?

and maybe it’s bc you guys have been getting along so well lately and the vibes are??? immaculate

but the atmosphere suddenly gets super thick and he !! just !! leans down !! and !! kisses !! you !!

and phew baby you bet that you immediately respond to it

you’re literally making out on the floor for like five minutes

and mind you, five minutes is a long time

until rocky’s phone rings loudly through the speaker and you both suddenly separate

he scurries to his phone and you sit up trying to compose yourself 

jinjin: park minhyuk where are you?! it’s 3 am!!

you literally hear jinjin scolding rocky through the phone and you laugh a little bc it’s so cute how he’s getting nagged right now

rocky: hyung...im practicing...

jinjin: do i need to drag you out of there?! i’ll literally call bin to carry your ass to our apartment! how long have you been practicing huh?? have you eaten dinner at all??

rocky: okay okay I’ll come back home

he turns to you after ending the call and he’s so !! shy !!

rocky: I guess that’s the end of our practice haha...do you want me to walk you back to your place?? it’s pretty late out

you: yeah that’d be nice...hm you sure your hyung’s not gonna call a search party for you??

you’re teasing him and he just pouts

rocky: i’ll be fine

rocky walks you back to your apartment and it’s a little?? awkward?? 

but before you bid him goodbye he’s like: uh...the kiss earlier...sorry if I surprised you

your cheeks are hot again: it’s um...it’s okay, I didn’t mind it...it was actually pretty nice...I guess...

and rocky’s heart skips a beat and now he’s blushing: yeah...it was...i’ll see you in class then??

you: yeah, i’ll see you. text me when you get home okay?

he nods and waits until you’re safely inside and then he just starts grumbling to himself

rocky: i’ll see you in class?? could i say anything more stupid??? 

rocky’s adorable okay

him texting you when he gets back: im home :)

you: that’s good! good night rocky :)

he goes to the guys the day after like: i have a predicament !! me and y/n kissed !! 

jinjin: that’s why you were late last night??

eunwoo: you dirty dog, doing it in the dance studio??

rocky: we didn’t do anything else hyung !!

bin: so did you ask them out??

rocky: no...i said...i’ll see you in class

myungjun: i’ll see you in class?!?! are you an idiot??

sanha: hyung even I’d ask y/n out after that

rocky: i know !! im dumb okay!! help me

sanha: you’re a lost case sorry

jinjin: why don’t you start with, hey y/n do you wanna get some food with me??

rocky: AHHHH

yes he does want to ask you out, yes he does want to kiss you again more than he’d like to admit, but he’s shy

you’re not faring any better, you and roommate were literally talking about it all weekend

the next time you see rocky (in class), you two are awkward as fuck

you both keep stealing glances at each other and then if one of you get caught, you both immediately look away

those 50 minutes of class could not go by any slower

and you were so ready to book it after the professor dismissed you but then you hear rocky call your name

rocky: hey y/n, are you free right now?

you: uh yeah! why what’s up

rocky: do you...um...wanna get some coffee with me?? or food or something??

you: do you mean like just to hang out or...uh like a date?

rocky: a date...if you want it to be

and cue the blushies again

you and rocky end up going to this cute cafe and get smoothies bc neither of you were feeling caffeine at the moment

and the whole time you two are just ??? so cute and shy and awkward with each other ???

which is such a contrast from how you two would dance together

rocky’s so sweet, really the cutest boy

gives you so many butterflies

the two of you end up going on little cafe dates before practice 

and you’re all cute and wholesome

and then he turns all passionate and dominant when you start dancing

like wow alright rocky giving you whiplash or whatever

when you show the routine for your midterm, the teacher and other students give you both high praises 

and he’s all giddy after class and he goes up to you: i think its safe to say that we have really good chemistry when we work together, don’t you think?

you’re smiling hehe but you wanna mess with him a little: hmm i think we’re alright, but who knows, i might mesh well with someone else

and then he’s all frowny, a little jealous: what do you mean someone else? do you make out with someone who just has alright chemistry with you??

your eyes go wide and you put your hand over his mouth: im kidding!!

rocky just smirks at your embarrassed reaction and he like tickles your sides

and then he just grabs your hand like: don’t find another dance partner y/n, just be mine

how could you say no to that??? especially when rocky’s just looking all handsome and charming and shit??? exactly. you can’t and why would you ever say no in the first place??

you and rocky dating?? biiiig news in the dance department

and even outside of it

bc lowkey rocky had a bit of a fanclub bc of how good he is at dancing, are we shocked? no

the boys are so happy for him !!

you meet his friends literally the day the two of you start dating

and you’re a bit nervous meeting them bc ofc you want them to like you, they’re his friends

but they’re so sweet...and headass

when rocky brings you to their dinner, the five of them literally start applauding at your entrance

you were so confused and rocky’s just out here with second hand embarrassment

he’s the cutest boyfriend

shy with pda in public (unless you’re dancing), most he’ll do is hold your hand

but in private he’s very clingy

loves backhugging you

he also tickles you when he wants to be a little shit

which is 50% of the time

very playful bf, will tease you at least once every day

if you two are just practicing dancing, he’ll make any sort of excuse to hold you or kiss you

asddfadsjf he’s so cute

gets very soft at night especially when you two are worn out from practice

just wants to go back to your (or his) apartment and cuddle and sleep

imagine just you two cuddling in bed after hours of dancing and he’s just spooning you and he mumbles tiredly into your shoulder: you’re amazing y/n...you’re one of the best dancers i’ve ever seen

and before, his pride would have never allowed him to say that, but now it can

not really one for pet names in my opinion, but he does call you “my y/n”

after you two start dating, you begin to call him by his real name, minhyuk

or you say hyukie

he lowkey loves it when you call him that, it’s so endearing

the guys teasing him, cooing at rocky all gross like : heyyy hyukkie

then rocky just like crosses his arms: only y/n can call me hyukie

he didn’t realize he loves couple dances so much until you and him are dating

well he only loves it because you’re his partner ofc

alright hear me out !! slow dancing with rocky

slow !! dancing !! with !! rocky !!

he dims the lights in the dance studio until it’s just a single spotlight and some slow romantic music comes on and he just grabs you by the hand and twirls you once before pulling you close and you’re just swaying side to side

and then he presses your foreheads together and he’s just looking into your eyes and gives you the softest smile

!!! im freaking out!! i want this so bad !!

that’s how the first i love you comes out

surprise, you say it first

okay but like in the moment, the atmosphere is literally so perfect, and you can just see how much he treasures you and you always feel butterflies whenever he does this, but there was just something that night that made you say it

like your chest was constricting so hard and you were thinking to yourself, i love this man

and so you just said it

and omg the smile on rocky’s face just widens and he kisses you so sweetly before he says it back

loves kissing you, your lips are like a drug to him

can literally make out with you for hours

has pushed you against the walls of the practice room just for a little make out session

ahhh here we go ladies and gents

sex !! with !! rocky !!

first and foremost, dance studio sex??? yes

especially if it’s just you two late night practicing like the first time you kissed?

mirror kink? maybe so

and bc y’all are ~flexible~, you bet he likes bending your back like a pretzel

he’s a very passionate lover, your pleasure is his #1 priority

loves foreplay just as much as the main event

but oof his hips?? grrrrr bark bark ram me over with a truck

his stroke game is so good

literally knows how to fuck you in all the right places

and his stamina??? god tier, can go at it for hours on end

into edging and overstimulation, oof you bet you’re cumming at least twice during every session

i cannot stress this enough!! thigh riding

you know he has thighs of steel

will make you cum just from riding his thigh

most of the time you guys start off slow and sweet, and then just boom it turns it hard sex

will definitely get turned on from doing a sexy dance routine

the amount of times he’s wanted to just fuck you in the middle of class bc you turned him on?? but ofc he has public decency he won’t do that

he knows you get turned on from his fingers oops

anal or vaginal fingering?? he’s all for it baby

he’s loud during sex, all the grunting, huffing, growling, oo im getting chills

not afraid to tell you how good you’re making him feel

not really into spanking, but he grips a lot, like his fingernails have definitely left some deep imprints in your hips or your ass

hair pulling?? yes, both sides receiving

okay but if you call him rocky during sex? big turn on

i can’t explain why, it just is

favorite position?? cowgirl

he loves when you’re on top of him

yes he likes seeing you try to fuck yourself on him

and then when he can’t take it anymore and just grabs your hips and thrusts up into you until your body literally collapses on him

he always tries to make you cum first but oops sometimes baby just busts a nut

yes you will probably tease him about it and then he’ll just shut you up by kissing you 

on another note, no way to turn rocky on faster than sucking on his bottom lip when you’re kissing

will cuddle you after cumming, like he doesn’t care if either of you are sweaty or messy, he’s hugging you for at least five minutes

honestly becomes a baby after sex so it’s more like you’re giving him after care sksksk

the switch he makes from being a sex fiend to a clingy cuddly boy? whiplash

like you need to go to the bathroom to pee or something and he’s like: but...i wanna hug u

i would risk it all for rocky yes

anyway after graduating, rocky becomes a choreographer for this really famous dance studio and get recruited to join a highly-competitive dance troupe

you both do long distance for a little bit bc obviously he’s back home but you have to travel with your group for competitions, sometimes even internationally

and so that caused some strain in your relationship bc distance sucks, but you would always make sure to call him every night before going to bed and despite any time zone difference, he would always answer

your biggest supporter !! literally flew out to surprise you during a big dance competition in london or whatever and you cried happy tears bc was he really there right now??

that’s when you knew that he was the one :’)

you spent the night w him in his hotel room and after a good couple rounds of reunion sex, you were like trying to test the waters a little bit: i missed you hyukie

rocky: i missed you too, but now that you’re here with me, nothing else matters

you: what do you really think about this long distance thing??

rocky: it sucks...but i know it made us stronger. i feel like we can get through anything now

you: yeah, i agree

rocky getting paranoid: omg why? are you thinking of living abroad?? y/n, do i need to start looking at dance studios out here??

you have to hold in your laughter bc he’s so cute: why? would you move out of the county for me if i wanted to??

rocky: i mean...if you’re thinking of leaving for good...then yeah.

he gets so shy and quiet and you’re just !! wow you love him !! he’s yours !!

you kiss him shortly and you smile: no, i’m not gonna live abroad. I miss being home and I miss seeing you all the time. I told you before, I’m thinking of leaving the troupe in two months and then gonna find a job back home for good.

he lets out a sigh of relief: you scared me a little

you just laugh: I only wanted to confirm something and hmm I was right

rocky: what did you wanna confirm??

you being a confident baddie: that I wanna be with you for the rest of my life

rocky feeling his heart implode: you mean it??

you scoffing: why would I be lying about this?

he just laughs and kisses you: I wanna be with you too...I’ve been thinking it since the last time you visited. How much I love you and how much I hated seeing you leave for who knows how long, but I didn’t wanna say anything bc you’re still living your life and I didn’t want a promise like this to influence you to come back if you didn’t want to yet.

two months later you’re back for good and move in with rocky

you end up becoming a choreographer at his dance studio too

you and rocky: the couple™

and you live happily ever after

somewhere down the line...

sanha: hey remember when you two hated each other?

eunwoo: remember when you injured y/n??

bin: remember when you freaked out to us about your first kiss together

myungjun: and you said i’LL sEe yOu iN cLaSs

jinjin: those were fun times, right hyukie?

rocky: i hate you all

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2-16-21

[thathopelessromantic]

Reckless Good (6/?)

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia/My Hero Academia Fic Rating: Explicit Chapter Rating: Teen+ Pairing: Todoroki Shouto/Midoriya Izuku Note: Thanks again for your amazing support so far! I really appreciate all of you and your comments have been making my weeks since posting <3 This fic will be going on a short hiatus...I'm not sure how long it will be but July has been shockingly busy this year and has only continued to get crazier so I need a little more time to write more of this fic 

Todoroki Shouto had accepted his fate as a public figure when he became a pro-hero, but there are some parts of his private life he would like to stay private. When he gets invited to be a speaker in a college lecture series, he goes to the meeting with one goal: to give the coordinator a piece of his mind and finally put an end to people hounding him for information about his family.

The last thing he expects is the curious, and quirkless, hero- and quirk-study professor, Midoriya Izuku, who has no interest in his family’s history, and, somehow, even more ties to the hero industry than Shouto. Intrigued by the professor, Shouto tentatively agrees to the lecture series, unknowingly intertwining their futures.

But the more Todoroki sees of Midoriya, the more questions he has. When a villain attack leaves them living together until the culprits are apprehended, maybe he’ll finally get some answers.

AO3: (x) Beginning/Chapter One: (x) Previous Chapter: (X) TDDKBB2021 Companion Art: (X)

It’s been three days since the debriefing, and Shouto hasn’t been able to think about much else besides the weirdness of everything that happened in the meeting. Even now, standing under the scalding spray of his shower, he’s going through the motions, but his mind is in the hallway outside the conference room with Ingenium.

“I’m sorry about lying to you regarding Architect,” Ingenium had said solemnly. They’ve grown and their costumes had both changed since then, but without his helmet on, head bent to discuss something quietly, Shouto was reminded of the in-class exercises they used to do in high school. Off to the side in a hallway, as if creating a strategy. Somehow adult-Ingenium had gotten even more serious than his high school counterpart. “I know it was wrong to mislead you, but I knew he meant no harm. I knew he could help with Kou.”

“How?” Shouto had asked, but even then he had a feeling he knew the answer.

“…I’ve worked with him before,” Ingenium admitted. “I know the law, but he…he just wants to help people. And he does good hero work.”

Ingenium couldn’t say afterwards if he thought Architect would still somehow help the case. He knew he would want to, but with more people involved, and more people who knew he had been there before, it would be harder. Shouto can’t articulate exactly why, but somehow knowing he might be what brings more scrutiny towards Architect makes him feel…guilty? It’s not his fault that he didn’t know, nor is it his fault Architect is technically doing something illegal, but he feels guilty anyways.

Shouto’s phone chimes just as he steps out of the shower. Even before he checks it, he knows it’s a new text from Midoriya. While Shouto has thought of little else but the weirdness that had transpired at the debriefing for the last three days, Midoriya has acted as if it never happened. He had been quiet the rest of the day afterwards, but the next day Midoriya had picked up their text chat where they had left off as if nothing had happened. The few times Shouto tried to broach the topic of Midoriya’s behavior at the debriefing, his contacts with heroes, the vigilante Architect, anything from the debriefing, all he got was an abrupt subject change or radio silence for a few hours. After a day and a half of the back and forth, Shouto gave up pushing the subject. For now.

Shouto slings a towel around his hips and grabs his phone off the counter. There’s a new picture attached to the message. Midoriya’s scarred hand holds a large navy book out in front of the camera. The sidewalk serving as a background and the blurred edges of the image suggests he was walking somewhere as he took the picture.

I found a copy of the book!! The text underneath reads.

Shouto can’t make out any title in the picture, but he knows what book it is anyways. There was only one they had really discussed in-depth that would warrant such an excited text. It was an early study of dual quirks. Apparently, according to Midoriya, some of the information and conclusions they came to is now outdated but it is still considered one of the best introductory texts for understanding how dual quirks come about with inheritance. He had been suggesting it to Shouto practically since they had started their text conversation.

Another text comes in before Shouto can come up with a reply.

I can keep this copy in my office, if you would like to come by for it sometime.

Shouto wouldn’t mind going by the professor’s office again. It wasn’t that far out of his way, and it would be a good excuse to see him and talk to him some more – either about quirks, or whatever the hell was going on at the debriefing in an environment he can’t escape so easily. But as he mentally goes through his schedule thinking of a time he might be able to get there, it would be at least another week, if not two.

Shouto grimaces, running a hand over his face.

between normal wrk nd this new case itll be a while…

Of course I understand you’re busy! Oh unless you wanted to read it sooner

Shouto glances at the time. He still has almost two and a half hours before his next shift starts. It would be enough time. Probably. Depending on how long it takes to get Midoriya to agree. He has an idea but he knows Midoriya isn’t going to like it.

are u in musutafu now?

Yes. Of course! I could drop it off at your agency!

i was thinking just my apartment

Shouto puts his phone down to find something to wear. He doesn’t usually wear normal clothes under his uniform, but he figures he has a little while before he needs to change into it. He expects to get a flurry of messages protesting his suggestion as he finds and pulls on a pair of sweatpants, but a full three minutes pass before his phone chimes with another message. It just reads: what, lacking even Midoriya’s usual proper grammar and capitalization.

Shouto snorts. He knew he wasn’t going to like it.

im at the hospital on guard today and ill be out of the office the next few days. it would be quicker

That does set off the flurry of texts he expected the first time, Midoriya insisting that wasn’t necessary and he didn’t need to read it that quickly and a few that just said no a few times. The texts are still coming in, the notification that he’s typing still lit up on the screen, when Shouto presses the phone icon next to his name and starts a call.

The phone starts to ring. And then continues to ring for so long, Shouto thinks he’s going to go to voicemail, when Midoriya suddenly answers. There’s a shuffle on the other line for a moment.

“Entro-er, Todoro…hello?” Midoriya says.

“Hello, Midoriya,” Shouto replies.

Shouto’s simple greeting seems to knock Midoriya out of his stupor, because he immediately jumps back into his protests, picking right back up where he left off in his texts. Shouto waits until he has to stop to take a breath.

“I figured you would really frown upon me texting you my address, so I thought I’d call. Do you have something to write with?”

Midoriya sputters for a moment before he sighs. “You…yeah, go ahead.”

Shouto blinks in surprise. He really expected more of a protest than that. Still, he rattles off the address before Midoriya comes to his senses and changes his mind. Midoriya has him repeat it once, just to be sure he copied everything down correctly.

“Okay. I guess I will see you in a few minutes,” Midoriya says, sounding resigned.

Shouto almost laughs at the tone. “You don’t actually have to bring it to me if it’s any trouble. I can get it from the office eventually.”

“No, I don’t mind and it’s not that far out of the way actually,” Midoriya admits. “I’m a little concerned by your complete disregard for privacy or self-preservation but otherwise, it’s no trouble.”

“‘A lack of self-preservation and privacy’ is pretty much in my job description.”

Midoriya sighs. There’s some quiet mumbling Shouto can’t make out through the phone before Midoriya seems to give up on arguing the point for the moment and says his goodbye.

Shouto plugs his phone in by the bed to charge until he has to leave. Monarch and Momo still haven’t let go of the last time his phone died while he was on duty and he’s sure even being away from the agency for the next few days won’t save him from their ire if it happens again.

Shouto is still toweling off his hair when there’s a knock on his door. He glances at the clock on his wall, but even without the visual confirmation, he knows it has only been a few minutes since his call with Midoriya had ended. It was unlikely he found his apartment that quickly. He throws the towel over the bar in the bathroom and grabs a t-shirt on his way out of his room.

He opens the front door, expecting to see one of his neighbors in the hall. Instead, it is Midoriya staring at him from the other side of the door. He looks almost the exact same as the first time they had met with his thin, crooked wire frame glasses and oversized leather satchel hanging at his side. Though he had replaced his ill-fitting cardigan with a Froppy sweatshirt and a jean jacket over a button-up. Midoriya’s eyes scan over him quickly, pausing briefly at his middle before jumping back to his face and then to the space next to his head.

“Hello,” Midoriya manages quietly.

Shouto tugs the bottom of his shirt the rest of the way down.

“Hello. I…wasn’t expecting you to find the place so quickly,” he replies simply.

“Um, yes, it was closer than I realized too,” Midoriya finally looks him in the eye again, only to look away a moment later to bow his head. “I’m sorry, I should have announced myself somehow.”

“It’s fine, Midoriya. I’m glad you didn’t have to go too far out of your way.”

They stand in an awkward silence for a moment before they both seem to remember themselves and try to speak again.

Midoriya fumbles with the leather bag at his side, searching for the book. “Right, I’m sure you need to finish getting ready for work-” he starts to say.

At the same time, Shouto steps back, opening his door further. “Would you like to come in?”

Midoriya stares at him in surprise for a moment before his gaze jumps to something behind Shouto, brow furrowing.

“Todoroki, do you live alone?”

“Um, yes?” Shouto glances over his shoulder but doesn’t see whatever it was that Midoriya must have seen.

He turns back around, but Midoriya is still staring hard at something in the distance.

“Midoriya, what did-"

A loud crash of breaking glass cuts off the rest of Shouto’s question. Midoriya reacts a second before him, grabbing Shouto’s arm and throwing them both down the hall, away from his door as flames erupt in the apartment behind him.

They tumble to the ground. Shouto lands hard on his back as they roll for a moment, the floor below him and Midoriya landing heavily on top of him knocking the air from his lungs. One of Midoriya’s hands cushioned his head in the fall, but he pulls it back quickly as if Shouto burned him.

Midoriya quickly lifts himself up, carefully checking Shouto over. “Are you alright?”

Shouto nods, not yet ready to try speaking again. The sound of a vicious fire cracks behind them and the smell of smoke is already starting to fill the hallway. Whatever was thrown has a fast-moving fire and Shouto can feel the heat even from a few feet away.

“Will your fire alarm alert the authorities?”

Shouto pushes himself to a sitting position . “Don’t have a fire alarm,” he chokes out. They really need to move. “They go off too easily.”

Midoriya stares at him for a moment like he’s lost his mind before realization dawns. “Right your quirk would probably make that a pain. Okay, I’ll call for help. But we need to get as many people out as we can before they get here.”

Shouto climbs to his feet, using the wall to hold himself up for the moment. Everything seems to feel okay, so he doesn’t think he’s injured, just winded. Midoriya looks worried but he still scrambles to his feet a moment later.

“I can get my upstairs neighbors out,” Shouto says.

“I’ll help everyone below evacuate,” Midoriya offers before Shouto has barely finished speaking. He takes off for the stairwell, glancing back at the last second. “Be careful, Todoroki.”

Shouto stares after him for a moment, incredulous. ‘I’m the pro in this situation,’ he wants to remind Midoriya. ‘And probably marginally more fire-resistant than you.’ “You too,” is all he manages instead as the stairwell door swings shut behind Midoriya. Faintly, Shouto remembers another time he watched a civilian run head-long into trouble, but he brushes off the otherwise long-forgotten memory. It was so long ago, he’s not sure what dredged up the old memory, but dwelling on it won’t help anyone right now.

Shouto forces himself away from the door and his desire to go after the apparently reckless, mysterious, crazy-overachieving civilian he just let run into danger and heads for his closest neighbor. There are only three apartments on each floor. The one next to him has been empty for months, and usually both of the Fukudas were at work during this time of day, but he pounds on the door just to be safe, calling for them both. Smoke is finally beginning to fill the hallway and he knows it will only be another minute or two before the fire itself begins to crawl its way out of the apartment too.

Shouto breaks through the door, calling for either of the Fukudas to answer as he darts through the handful of rooms laid out in a mirror of his own familiar apartment. Satisfied that it is empty, he goes back to the hall heading for the stairs. He can feel his right side rapidly growing colder as his quirk tries to regulate his body temperature. The overheated air burns his already sore chest as he runs.

Shouto is already shouting as he reaches the next floor, hoping to alert as many of his neighbors as he can. One door opens as he throws himself down the hall, an older woman looking at him suspiciously through the crack in her door. For once he’s thankful for his unique appearance because he sees recognition dawn on her a moment later, even without his hero suit.

“A fire started on the floor below, I’m trying to evacuate everyone on this floor and the next, if you have anyone home with you, get them!”

The woman nods in understanding, throwing her door open and running back into the apartment calling for someone. Shouto goes to the next closest apartment, banging on the door and calling for anyone who might be inside. The door to the apartment next door opens and a man looks out.

“What is all the racket about? They went to their parents for the week, no one is in there.”

“The apartment is empty right now?”

The man glares at him, but Shouto pushes on before he can start an argument with him. The first woman comes out of her apartment with her grandson and a small dog in tow. “Sir, there is a fire on the floor below. We’re evacuating everyone.”

The man still looks like he wants to argue, but a moment later the sound of sirens grows louder as help arrives on the scene and that seems to be enough to convince him to cooperate. The three tenants follow him up the stairs to the last floor. Two of the three doors are already open, the tenants looking out obviously wondering what all the noise is about. The woman and her grandson greet one of the two women, immediately filling them in on what’s going on. Shouto goes to the last door.

“She’s at work,” one of the women calls to him. “She lives alone. Except for a cat.”

Shouto nods his thanks for the information. “I’ll go in to get the cat. Do either of you have a window that faces the front of the building?”

The other woman raises her hand. “I do!”

“Please take everyone into your apartment, clear a space in front of the window if necessary and I’ll be there in just a moment.” Shouto instructs. He waits just a moment to make sure everyone is complying before he forces the last door open. The cat in question makes itself known immediately, rushing to the door crying for attention before it realizes he is not their owner. The cat turns tail and darts deeper into the apartment.

Cursing, Shouto uses ice to create a small blockade in the hall that leads to the bedroom and bathroom, limiting the cat’s escape routes as he darts after it, sliding across the hardwood floor leading into the hallway. He catches himself on the wall just as the cat skids to a halt before the ice, trying to turn quickly but the floor is more slippery than its accustomed to and Shouto manages to grab it as it struggles to find its footing. He gets a few heavy scratches across his arms for his trouble, and the cat does its best to escape his hold, but he manages to get it out of the apartment. He wishes he had his tool belt on him, where he might have something that could contain the cat better, and make it easier to transport, but even if the fire-resistant fabric had lasted this long, it wasn’t worth it to try and get back into his apartment for it.

He rejoins his neighbors in the other apartment. Along with the three from the first floor, there are the two women from this floor, one of whom clutches a still-sleeping baby to her chest. From the window he can see the ambulance and two fire engines that have already arrived. And based on the sounds in the distance, the police and at least one more ambulance would not be far behind. Someone offers to take the disgruntled cat from him as he throws open the window.

Smoke is billowing from a window on a lower floor, obscuring his line of sight for a moment as the winds shift. Shouto swears under his breath, he can feel his neighbors growing anxious behind him, but he knows he needs a clear shot of the ground for this to work. It takes a few minutes for the view to clear enough for him to see a good landing place. By then a few people from the lower floors have started to evacuate, and he can see the first responders meeting them as they come out. He can’t tell from here if Midoriya is with them yet, though he has a feeling the answer is no.

Pushing his concerns aside for the moment, Shouto takes a deep breath to focus. Even after all these years of playing catch up, he still has a much better control of his right side than his left, but the overheated air is already putting a strain on his right side as it keeps his body cool. He creates an ice ramp, or perhaps more accurately a slide, from the window to the ground besides one of the fire engines. It’s as far as he dares to go to keep the slide from being too steep without also becoming too thin. He reinforces the part connected to the building and as much of the underside as he can from where he is to keep the fire from melting it down.

He turns back to his gathered neighbors. The adults gathered look unsure at best, if not down right afraid, but the young boy looks excited.

“It’ll be cold going down, but you should be perfectly safe,” Shouto promises. “Who’s first?”

Shouto helps the first woman up to the window. Once she is down safe, the woman with her baby goes, climbing up by herself first before Shouto hands the infant off to her. The young boy volunteers next before his grandmother can stop him, scrambling up to the window and then asking Shouto to hand the dog up to him. The older woman goes next, clutching the terrified cat tightly to her chest as she disappears down the slide.

Shouto waits until the older man safely reaches the bottom after her before he prepares to go down himself. Taking one last look back before he drops, he sees the smoke begin to curl around the edges of the apartment door.

 The fire chief stops Shouto first once he’s down, thanking him for his help evacuating the civilians and asking about the conditions inside. Shouto gives as much information as he can about the fire and where it started. He ignores the concerned expression the chief gives him as he explains how it began. He knows it seems like an attack, and a targeted attack at that, but he doesn’t want to focus on it just yet. Eventually, the chief figures he’s gotten as much as from Shouto as he’s going to for the moment and sends him off towards the paramedics.

Shouto dodges them for the moment, finding the neighbors he helped down first to make sure everyone actually made it down unharmed. Everyone seems okay, the baby somehow still blissfully asleep and the young boy excitedly asks Shouto if he can go down his ice slide again some other time. One of the first responders found a carrying case for the cat until they could get ahold of its actual owner. He recognizes a few of the other neighbors gathered around from the lower floors. A few have shock blankets on and one person is perched in an ambulance with a paramedic attached to an oxygen machine, but there don’t seem to be any major injuries.

Midoriya is arguing with a paramedic, insisting someone else is in more pressing need of care when Shouto finally approaches one of the ambulances.

“What’s that saying about doctors being the worst patients?” Shouto asks.

Midoriya jumps, startled by his arrival, though he quick recovers from his shock to glare at Shouto.

The paramedic throws his hands up. “Entropy, please try and talk some sense into him. This is the fourth time he’s refused care.” The paramedic turns back to Midoriya and waves a warning finger at him. “I’m running out of other patients to look at.” He warns before storming off.

“Are you alright? What happened?” Shouto asks once they’re alone. Midoriya mostly looks okay, his glasses are missing and he’s a little sooty and disheveled, but Shouto figures everyone probably looks about the same in that regard.

“Nothing,” Midoriya starts to say as someone nearby loudly clears their throat over him. Midoriya scowls. “I think I might have landed on my hand funny earlier, but it’s fine, probably just sore.”

Shouto frowns. “You should at least have someone look at it, just in case.”

Midoriya opens his mouth to argue but a ringing phone cuts him off. He fumbles with his phone for a moment, struggling to pull it out of a pocket with his opposite hand. He winces as he finally pulls it out.

“Shit.”

“What?”

“It’s a video call.” Midoriya doesn’t elaborate anymore. He shifts around before he answers, holding the phone up at an angle that keeps his arm and the ambulance mostly out of the camera. He pastes on a bright smile. “Hi, Eri.”

“Oh Izuku, are you okay? I heard you were involved in a fire. Are you injured? What happened?” Dr. Aizawa asks in a rush, her worried face fills the screen. Red eyes move quickly, obviously taking note of Midoriya’s disheveled apperance.

“I’m fine. Everyone’s fine. We’re not sure exactly how it started yet,” he lies. “But no one was hurt.”

“Where are you? I’ll go-”

“No,” Midoriya cuts her off. “I’m fine and I’ll come by the hospital later so you can check me over yourself if you’re really that worried, but I’m fine. And I want to make sure someone is keeping an eye out for Kou.”

“You think this has to do with her?” Dr. Aizawa asks, surprised.

“I’m not sure yet, I would just feel better if I knew there was extra security around her.”

Dr. Aizawa nods. “Okay, Izuku. I’ll make sure someone has an eye on her at all times. I’ll call you later to check up on you.” She says. “And I’ll know if you don’t let the paramedics check on you so don’t even try it this time.” The call ends before Midoriya can refute her last statement.

“I’m supposed to be taking the next shift on the hospital,” Shouto realizes. “I still had another two hours before my shift began when you arrived, but I should let someone know.”

Midoriya offers Shouto his phone. Before Shouto can step away, the paramedic returns with his arms crossed.

“Ready to cooperate?”

Midoriya looks miserably over his shoulder at Shouto but lets the paramedic force him into a seat.

Shouto calls Momo on her private number.

“This is Creati.” Momo answers stiffly after a single ring.

“Momo, it’s Shouto. My phone is…I don’t have my phone right now. There was just a fire-”

“At your apartment building. I know I just got the alert. Are you okay? You were still home, weren’t you?”

“Yes. I’m fine. No one was injured, but they’re still putting out the fire and I’m pretty sure my apartment is gone. It started there.”

Momo takes a long time to reply. “Your quirk?” She finally asks, but she sounds like she already knows the answer.

“No. I think…It seems crazy, but…” Shouto hesitates. He lives on the third floor, but crazier things have probably happened to him. “I think someone threw something through my window to start it.”

Momo curses under her breath. “I was afraid of that. You haven’t heard from anyone else, yet, have you? There was another attack, across town. Not a fire, but a building came down. A few civilians were hurt, and…”

Shouto tries not to lose his patience with Momo as she hesitates.

Finally she sighs. “The latest report from the police just came over the radio. Mr. Smith was one of the only heroes in the area. He was severely injured while helping trapped civilians. Paramedics rushed him to the hospital a few minutes ago. No one’s sure of his status yet.”

“Fuck.” Midoriya was right. “This is about Kou. The girl from before you have to-”

“I know your schedule, Shouto.” Momo interrupts. “As soon as I got the alert I let them know you might have been targeted. Someone has already been assigned to your guard shift and they’ve added extra security to the hospital.”

Shouto feels himself relax for the first time since the fire began. If there’s one thing he can count on, it’s Momo to be on top of things. “Thank you.”

Momo replies with a quiet hum of acknowledgement. “Is there anything else I can do for you right now? Do you need anyone else at the scene?”

“No, everything seems pretty well in hand for now. But if you could let my mother and sister know, that would help. They’ll see it on the news eventually, but even if my phone survived the fire it will probably be a while before I can get it to contact them myself.”

“Of course, I’ll make sure they know you’re alright. Can I contact you on this number again?”

Shouto glances back at Midoriya. He’s, miraculously, still sitting in the ambulance doors letting the paramedic wrap his hand, but he also managed to call over one of the firefighters to discuss something about the attack. “Yeah, you can use this number again.”

“Let me know when you learn something more.”

“I will.”

“I’m really glad you’re okay, Shouto.” Momo says just before she ends the call.

Me too, Shouto thinks, looking around at all the people gathered in front of the apartment. He and Midoriya had managed to get everyone out, but if Shouto had been alone he might not have been quick enough. Hell, if he hadn’t been answering the door at just the right time, he might not have been able to save anyone at all. He would probably be right beside Mr. Smith in the hospital. I just wish it could be said for everyone.

Shouto returns to the ambulance, passing the cell back to Midoriya. Midoriya takes one look at his face and knows.

“You heard about Mr. Smith too?”

Shouto nods. “Creati already sent word to the hospital for extra security and for someone to cover my shift watching Kou.”

Midoriya cracks a small smile. Other than the one he wore to briefly pacify Dr. Aizawa, it’s the first smile Shouto thinks he’s seen from him all day. And bizarrely, it puts him at ease for a moment, lifting some of the weight of the attack.

“Remind me to send her a huge thank you gift when we finally get out of here,” Midoriya says, and even though Momo is just doing her job in her own efficient, overachiever way, he knows Midoriya is serious.

Midoriya moves over, offering the extra space for Shouto to sit down. Another paramedic almost immediately descends on them, finally checking Shouto over for shock, smoke inhalation, over-extended quirk usage, and other injuries. Other than the handful of cat scratches that they clean and bandage, he comes out with a clean bill of health. Midoriya is comparing their injuries, complaining that his “bruised wrist” didn’t need more bandaging than Shouto’s cuts, but while his tone is light, his eyes keep focusing on something in the distance, his attention obviously not on their conversation. Shouto can practically hear the wheels turning in his head as he thinks.

The fire chief eventually joins them as the fire dies down and more of the firefighters exit the building for the last time. “Thank you again, Entropy, for your help evacuating tenants before we arrived. And…Midoriya, was it?”

“Dr. Midoriya,” Shouto corrects when Midoriya simply nods. Midoriya elbows him in the side, but Shouto ignores the jab.

“Dr. Midoriya, thank you for your help as well. That was very brave of you. A number of the tenants I’ve spoken with were extremely grateful for your assistance.”

Midoriya shrugs a shoulder, as if he had truly done nothing of note. “I’m just glad I was in the right place to help, at the right time.”

“Do we know anything else about the fire yet? Or the building?” Shouto asks.

“The fire is mostly out, we just have a few more people inside checking for any hidden fires or areas that weren’t extinguished completely the first time. As for the building…it will take a little while longer to properly assess all the damage but the third floor where it started, and the second and fourth floors, took the most damage. At the very least it will be a day or two before it’s safe for the tenants to move between the floors to get their things.” The chief explains.

Shouto expected about as much, honestly he was prepared to hear worse, but it doesn’t make it easier. “Thank you for letting us know.”

The chief nods. “Of course.”

Shouto turns back to Midoriya as the chief walks away. “Can I borrow your phone one more time?”

Midoriya politely, but unnecessarily, turns away as Shouto crafts a text to Momo.

the tenants will b displaced for at least a few days. can we do smthing abt accommodations for them?

It only takes Momo a few seconds to reply.

Of course. Send me the number of people and their contact information and I’ll take care of everything.

A second text comes in almost immediately.

Will you need something too? You could always stay with me and Kyouka. Or I’m sure your mother would be happy to have you for a few days.

Shouto stares at the message for a moment. “Shit.” He hadn’t been thinking about himself. Obviously he couldn’t stay in his apartment. But he wouldn’t want to be housed anywhere near his neighbors, in case whoever attacked tried again. But that would put his friends, or family, in the same line of risk.

“What’s wrong?” Midoriya finally turns back, looking over Shouto’s shoulder. “Was there another attack?”

Shouto shakes his head. “No, sorry to worry you. Momo just reminded me I’ll need a place to stay for a while. I don’t want to risk a hotel or some public housing, if they try to attack again…”

Midoriya doesn’t need him to finish his thought before he nods in understanding. “And you don’t want to stay with your friends or family for the same reason. There’s too much of a risk they will try to target you again.”

Shouto groans, running a hand over his face. Maybe Midoriya was onto something with all his concerns about ‘privacy and self-preservation.’

“Stay with me.”

Shouto’s head shoots up. He thinks he had to have misheard, but the serious expression on Midoriya’s face suggests otherwise.

“What?”

“You can stay with me. No, you should stay with me.”

Shouto feels like he was just transported to a parallel universe. He was actually fairly confident his role as the only one to suggest ridiculous things in this newly-started relationship was already established.

“I-No. I couldn’t ask that of you.”

“You’re not asking, I’m insisting.”

Shouto ignores him. “I can stay in the dorms at the agency.”

Midoriya rolls his eyes. “That’s an extremely short term solution, at best. And a huge risk. If these villains have kept close enough tabs on you to find your personal apartment and attack it, it would be child’s play to figure out you were staying in your office, with a publicly available address, and target it too.”

“You would still be at risk,” Shouto says, baffled as to how Midoriya somehow managed to miss that very important fact. “The same way Momo and Kyouka or my family would be, I can’t put you in that position.”

“Todoroki,” Midoriya says, deadly serious. “You are not a very social hero. It is common knowledge who you are close enough with to consider a friend. And your family has been in the spotlight for years. Staying with any of them is an obvious and dangerous choice. I’m a nobody. No one knows me, no one knows you know me. Also my house is…private, secluded. Even if someone does eventually figure out you’re there, it will take much longer than any of the other places. Enough time that we can come up with another plan.”

Midoriya reaches over and takes the cell out of his hands. “Now, unless you have a more convincing argument, I will text…” he looks at the phone for a long moment as he trails off. Shouto has no idea how he can casually insist on Shouto staying with him and in the same breath be visibly uncomfortable texting a different hero. “I will text…Creati and tell her you have a place to stay. You should go collect everyone else’s information for her.”

Shouto stares at Midoriya in disbelief while he pointedly ignores him and struggles to craft a text to Momo. He only finally moves when Midoriya all but shoves him off the ambulance step, claiming to be unable to type while he was being watched.

“I…can’t make sense of you,” Shouto finally admits. Midoriya has baffled him basically since the moment they met and he’s beginning to think he might never fully understand him.

Midoriya looks up from his phone with a curious expression, as if surprised by Shouto’s admission, before it transforms into a smile Shouto has never seen before, but that he wants to pull from him again and again.

“I like to think that’s just a part of my charm.”

[fruitylibrarian]

quest of the spear live rewatch!

i already spewed my pre call to adventure flynn thoughts all over a text post but I would like to repeat: pre-canon flynn my beloved <3

yes he is a bit of a bastard but he just loves his books and he’s so genuinely just like. passionate and like…. Big? does that make sense? like i mean inside. not literally. bright

flynn’s mom is so fucking funny

and she’s Trying Her Best

you know one thing I don’t understand, I assume that flynn could afford to keep going to college because of like grants and scholarships since he’s all smart and like, even if his mom is well off, no one below the morally bankrupt millionaire line can pay for 22 degrees and not die of no-money-itis otherwise known as Starving

but like. why not become a professor or some other academia position?

you’d be incredibly overqualified and you’re a white dude, so while academia isn’t exactly bursting with new spaces to fill I’m sure you could find something???? and like. a professor in particular, while baby flynn might not be great at the connection part, seems like a natural progression to at least try for considering it keeps you in that comfort zone and familiar space just in a different albeit familiar role, and allows you to go on long lectures people can’t interrupt. and like, professors literally like, part of their job is research and to continue learning, so like. it seems like the natural choice for him to go for?

don’t get me wrong, baby flynn in particular might not be extremely well suited considering his lack of people skills, but plenty of professors are brilliant slightly odd smarties who give long, super engaging theatrical lectures (sounds like him!) but suck at one on one meetings and talking to people or may be accidentally insulting, but like, their class is genuinely interesting and they grade decently so like, I think he could get past that hurdle is what I’m saying

obviously he’d have to work at it and get the skills necessary but you know what that means? MORE SCHOOL, BABY! just in a different direction! like just? it seems like the obvious choice for his situation

ah yes!!! magic letter!!! it’s kind of funny they do this, it’s a great hook and way to make applicants go Uh Excuse Me and want to know more but also like, there’s no proof magic happened either?

although you’d think some people would get obsessive like let me tell you if i encountered real ass magic like that i wouldn’t stop until i had an answer

ah the Incredibly Long Interview Line. it’s kinda how funny how like. Not Special he is but at the same time he is?

“never been treated so badly in my entire life!” what did you say to him charlene

i’m sure he deserved it i just want to know

wait oh no i just realized

all these people are dead

every single one of them got murdered in the first episode of the series

jesus that’s dark

not gonna be able to stop thinking about that one huh

also love how it’s pretty evenly men and women

although it’s still mostly white

fuck that lady just left crying I know they’re doing this to turn up the drama but DAMN, charlene

god he almost gave up. remember the timeline episode where he never became the librarian? weird.

Gkjlfkgjhfglh Where Do You Think You’re Going? (weak gesture like “me?”) Yes You. Get In Here amazing how can she even see him she’s around the CORNER. camera? magical surveillance? why? just to freak people out? amazing.

i do so love charlene, it’s a shame she wasn’t in the show more

also she literally never explains shit. What Makes You Think You Can Be The Librarian he doesn’t even know what that means, charlene

He Doesn’t Even Have A Library Science Degree

oh wow he does actually have librarian qualifications lmao

why did i not remember that

DLKFGJDFG I did remember him sherlocking her tho

wait her MARRIAGE? to WHO?

i thought her and judson were a thing despite jenkins being into her or something?

huh

also why does this qualify him to be The Librarian™ like oh he can sherlock? ok?

maybe it’s just bc he had the balls to do it

well, the sherlock thing is also not completely unhelpful it just doesn’t seem central to his skills, or at least, not the way he uses it (do we see him use it like this again? he usually applies more obscure knowledge then ye classic deduction sherlockian skills if I remember correctly which I may not because my brain is smooth)

judson is such a fucking drama queen

LKDJFGLKDJFGLDKFJG I FUCKING FORGOT HE LITERALLY JUST FUCKING REPEATED HIS MOM’S LITTLE PHRASE AMAZING

also why did he seem to think her sending everyone home meant he didn’t get it why would she stop all interviews because you fucked up

he just fucking walked out of a wall judson you are so dramatic

also warehouse 13 vibes huh. welcome to a world of endless wonder

I could do a whole fucking thesis on warehouse 13 and the librarians or—well that’s a whole other tangent

anYWYA

this interview was remarkably easy tho, it’s not like he wasn’t impressive but it wasn’t mindblowing either????? this coming from a big fan of flynn

the big shiny wonderous eyes as the library lights up……flynn my beloved

also his floofy hair ldkfgjdlkfgj

he’s like this is too good am I being prank’d

why the mona lisa?????iIs the mona lisa magic??? It only became famous because it got stolen why would it be magic??? Is this one of those we make it magic by believing it or some shit things???

Flynn Do Not Open The Random Box In The Library Of Incredibly Dangerous Artifacts

oh hello excalibur !!

oh rip flynn immediately being like “oh im not worthy, trust me” with 100 percent certainty im hurt oof

KSJFLGKDJGLKDJG THE APPLE “the apple from the garden of eden…….” *judson takes a bite* “actually I just left this here”

excalibur hello properly!!!!

judson is such a fucking DRAMA QUEEN he’s so casual!! and cal you too you slippery bitch!  

ah the jetpack.

DLFKGJDLKFGJ “it usually takes a new librarian four hours to find the jetpack. you did it in three! congratulations” love the implication that every librarian (at least since it was added to the library) has done this no matter how serious like the bad guy of this movie… *checks notes* edware wilde? jetpack. darrington dare, probably? jetpack. i like to think jenkins did it too (not technically a librarian, but you know)

flynn thinking of himself as embarrassing… ☹

HIS MOM IS SO PROUD OF HIM

part sweet, part funny, part rip

I don’t know what she was expecting when he said librarian tho like. originally he literally looked at shit for FRY COOk degrees don’t always mean shit you know

and librarian is up there with professor in Perfect Jobs For Flynn like what did you expect??? Like even if he’d become an archaeologist (a “cool” job) it’s not like that pays super well either as far as I know??

he was never going to be Traditionally Successful

he’s still the same person he still has the same strengths and passions of course he would go into academia and do something like librarian like????? her reaction saddens me.

just be happy for him!! look at him!!!

ok first of all even normal non magic librarians don’t just put books on shelves and that’s a condescending reduction of the job, and second of all, he is so happy!! he has a job, he’s taking responsibility, he’s meeting people, isn’t that enough??? isn’t that literally what you wanted??? even if it WERE what you think it is why couldn’t it just be a good first step??? like??? fuck??? you did been know that he was doing all those fancy degrees because he loved them not because they’d get him some super fancy job??? I mean egyptology is not the most profitable field you know this isn’t med school or whatever

god.

flynn’s mom, visibly not proud and very upset: of course im proud of you!

ok im being a little unfair, she’s trying and clearly she’s been supportive of him, if not straight up enabling of him, but like this is clearly being presented as like. normal person who is normal forced to take care of freakish strange son who is so nerdy and strange and a loser and she is so tired of his shenanigans and all that WORK she put in and he’s NOT FANCY AND CHANGING TO CONFORM TO HER IDEALS OF A GOOD SUCCESSFUL SON/MAN?

and that’s just all very. sigh.

the snake brotherhood are such obnoxiously cheesy villainous villains they’re even called the snake brotherhood

also I think we’re supposed to recognize him as the previous librarian from the painting but if I didn’t already know that I for sure would not know that

smartass flynn is a smartass

I never got people bringing someone coffee to impress them unless they knew their order like there’s no way you know who she likes her coffee so you could so easily get it wrong—like even if you don’t know exactly how much sugar she wants, you could also just get it entirely wrong like assume she likes black coffee but she likes it super sweet, or vice versa, or whatever. it can go wrong so easily!

or she could go “I Hate A Kiss Ass”

she did take it anyway tho so.

ah i did forget (or just not actively think about) how much like… christian mythology there is in this show :/ I mean we did been knew (excalibur and arthurian legend are pretty important to the mythology)

not that christian mythology is inherently bad it just gets a) annoying, b) boring, and c) y’know, very western centric and all

but then trying to reconcile di—you know what that’s a tangent for another time

then again I do assume no one is going to read this

the library really does just throw new librarians into death and go “hope this is fine!” huh

did they just imply god is canon in the “the librarian” universe

you were so cryptic with the no one thing!! just say NOONE

he’s scribbling in his notebook and mumbling out loud what a mood and I love him. what a nerd

ldfkgjdlkjg god sexy jazz music and a breeze this is so dumb

I do hate the forced love interests in all these movies it’s always like Some Hot Girl Is There And They Get It On!

like he really had chemistry with eve and banter but here it kinda feels like that wish fulfilment and then the nerd gets the hot chick the end and im saying that as the nerd

it doesn’t help that each movie has a different one who immediately is dropped as if she never existed afterwards

maybe it’s not as bad as I remember but. sigh

my instant impression of her is to not like her sorry nicole :/

she’s just so rude? she’s like. hot (derogatory)

i get there’s gender politics here with like. she’s used to being treated like a piece of meat and generally like, why not reap the benefits when you are going to get the creeps too, but like, also she’s just so unnecessarily rude—I mean rejecting his clumsy flirting is one thing but you know—ok I won’t even get into that the point is I just don’t really like her that much even tho I don’t think she’s necessarily a bad person or anything you know

but to be fair I think she got better and I remember her being compelling in her return to the show

and like. I do like how the trend in this franchise is “smart little nerd librarian and badass lady guardian kicks ass” but I do wish that it turned around occasionally. we do get cassandra but like. more lady librarians

wow an air marshal? aren’t they rarely even on flights?

sorry im being nitpicky there for sure lmao. please delete the cinamasins ding my words probably summoned from your brain

I get why shoving him out was necessary but also Wow

Gjklhkjfgh imagine sitting next to some mumbling nerd the whole flight and then you see him fly past the windows

LFKGJDLKJDFG he brilliantly lowers our expectations then jumps without a chute! remarkable!

hilarious or commentary on men getting credit for womens’ competency? why not both

i really thought that she was going to be a lying liar the first time I watched this

ah naïve boy. “uh that’s against the law”

flynn’s greatest strength isn’t just his knowledge but his like. breadth of different topics, just like, passion for learning of any time, and like. the ability to not just know a lot of different things but cross-reference and apply them to each other and use them in tandem to understand a greater whole

and we love that for him!

ah flynn therapizing himself lmao

why would she take him going “this bridge is rotting and physically cant support our weight” as a challenge

or him being cowardly like THE STRUCTURAL SUPPORTS ARE ROTTING

YEAH WHAT DID YOU EXPECT OF COURSE HE FUCKING FELL

ok i lied i like nicole i just don’t love their dynamic

i get what they’re going for i just. not my thing

like with eve there was still a clear mutual respect? i guess? idk

maybe it’s just because i’m more sensitive to mean banter? i don’t like mean banter, even when it’s like, def 100 percent well meaning and not mean spirited and no one is actually offended or hurt

although despite not liking their Thing I do a) think it’s very cute how he looks at her, b) their vibe as they start to get to know each other is Better, c) the end of the movie scene where she rides in for maximum drama? now that was good shit.

oh he’s sherlocking her in a shy attempt to impress her but it’s only going to piss her off, right?

oh she’s just sherlocking him back

KSGFJLDKFGJ LMAO “nerd” and that’s it. fair

Cutting Off His Head damn that’s hardcore

hmmmm cringe,

and more cringe

and cringe.

her waking up to him gone right after telling that story about waking up to her librarian gone and then killed—oof

love the serpent brotherhood lady being like wow!! he’s SO COMPETENT!! (cuts to him screaming)

do these ancient traps just have infinite arrows?

also I do love the whole waltzing across trope what can I say im a sucker

DFLKGLDKFGJLDKJG fucking CHUCKS SOMETHING AT IT and immediately where he would be standing is crushed by a huge rock amazing

he literally just chucked a rock at it and it fell over

ah the classic “let the hero get it for us” move

oh there he is! rip

why does he look like macpherson

not really but kind of

also contrast between the lady always being like “omg the librarian is so smart” and him assuming nicole is the one who did the smart thing

“your tears were perfect” how much more of an asshole can you get

They really could have played him as more sympathetic—“oh, we’re always around these powerful artifacts but we never use them for good! I had to do it, I was sick of sitting back and doing nothing” or like “all those years of danger and guarding powerful things and what good did it ever do me? what do I get for my service?” or anything but nah hes just like “mm power good babes. anyway I love sex and being mean”

to be fair flynn he was the librarian too—a real librarian? I mean yeah edward was corrupted and ultimately failed his duties but he had to have been qualified and actually got the job for a reason

flynn I know you think you sound badass but you really don’t

god not shangri-la again. everything the show did with that was. Bad. yikes

why is—god, I should really learn her name [checks notes] lana fangirling so much?

also following the lamia tradition of “serpent brotherhood second in command who is more interesting than the main evil white guy and also a pretty woc” huh

never got like “this is literally impossible” “well do it or I [generic bad guy threat]” like usually that means nothing lmao

LDFKGJLDKFJLDKFGJ ok first of all god is me? bitch?

second of all. me in english? on this fucking ancient very much not english thing? I mean I guess a) it might not be literal, even though he did say “m, e” by letters, b) it is a christian myth so maybe planted later??? but like?????

dude. giving the super powerful artifact to your prisoner? bad idea. if you’re worried about booby traps have a minion do it.

oh yes your gun is so scary in the face of a temple collapsing

why do heroes always think the whatever is safer with them than the temple that’s guarded it for a thousand years

I get it’s been discovered but like. fuck. still

You Are Going To Crash This Helicopter

SLKGJ HORRIBLE HIGH VELOCITY PIE OF DEATH

flynn and judson…..wholesome

oh here comes more forced romance

just let them be friends who grow to mutually respect each other blease

it is very fucking funny that the mom is like ….. oh my god…. oh my god,,, a WOMAN AJUST ANSEWREDM Y SDONGS PHONE?????????OH MY GOFD?????

he is bisexual. but it’s good he’s getting out

ah floofy hair

cahooting,

Yes You Do Need Clothes

that’s a teleporter sir

god eddie wild is such a boring fucking villain and person

and his plan SUCKS

also the serpent brotherhood (why BROTHERhood?) sucks and hates the library why would they just let this guy, a librarian, literally be their new leader

wow he just stabbed a guy on his OWN TEAM for no reason

great going asshole

love how lana is just like…. O-O

we stan lana. she hasn’t done much and she’s technically a bad guy i just love her

“at last we can be one” what does that even mean

why would lana or any of them want to help him he just killed one of their own for no reason hes clearly tripping on power and leaving yall to die

lfkgjdlkfgj flynn dodging so hard while the others is fight and then PUNCHING A GUY

dfglkjdflgkj wait it’s the professor dude why is that so funny

is he WITH THEM??? I think I just missed something

hold on a sec

yeah I think he just appears??? And flynn just fucking broke his nose iconic

wait so was he with them or is he just here going WHY ARE THERE RANDOM PEOPLE IN MY PYRAMID????????????

oh right he built the—ok I got it

Wait what

I mean I did think lana was neat and she seemed impressed with flynn but what shes just like, in love with him now? that makes zero fucking sense why would she want them to Be Together

Is it just so there can be a catfight between the two hot chicks?

seriously tho? morally pure blonde blue eyed girl versus Evil Asian Chick? really?

for the record NOT THAT IT MATTERS but lana is way cuter im just saying

ah badass judson

THE COMEDY OF THE CAPSTONE CRUSHING HIM DLFKGJDLKFGJ

oh………….pulling out excalibur…. predicable but so good

oh the painting….the very Parenty way of revealing it…… wholesome

oh did NOT like that transition

oh here comes the badass fucking entrance with his gf busting in on his mom trying to set him up with girls

HER ENTRANCE IS SO UNNECESSARAILY DRAMATIC I LOVE THEM

I just love the mom’s face ldfkgjldfkgjdlkfgjdlkfjgd shes like WHAT THEGUFVCJK

again I don’t love the vibes of “oh my weird loser son is finally normal!” but to be fair im exaggerating a bit from just facial expressions it’s just. sigh

but ngl the vindication of him being able to be like. yeah that’s right im a badass now and my gf is cool as fuck is still good

him and nicole do have not terrible vibes at the end but if I remember correctly that mission (time travelling ninjas and hg wells’s time machine) is the one that separated them so rip I guess

overall: good movie! as cringe as I remember but I still love flynn so much

[panticwritten]

Homecoming

I figure, to celebrate making through the summer, I’ll post one of the scenes I’ve been working on. It’s basically how Connor got back to the Cube three days before An Idiot’s Return.

Word Count: 2,978

Content warnings

Hallucinations

Implied suicidal ideology

Let me know if I missed any!

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I huddle in the corner of a room. Their room. Jess’s room, from home. Sometimes it turns into their father’s living room, but it’s normally the mess of a room that Jess used to hide in. We used to be there every day.

Together.

Now, there are three different projections of them all talking at once. They don’t acknowledge each other—or make any sense—but they’re all enthusiastic and happy to see me. They keep their eyes on me and pause regularly as if I’m actually answering them.

I sent my double back to the Cube.

He deserves to be there more than me. I can still feel the toxic ability in my head. I can’t go back, not if I want to keep everyone safe. From what I know, Jess is recovering just fine without me there.

I cover my face with my hands and slump against the wall.

I can’t tell what’s real anymore. What’s true.

“Even in the square root so tired so good what do you mean damn metaphors im trying ill show them symbolism it was awesome i thought it was good rewriting history, ha—”

“I’m fine.”

The three voices vanish in favor of one that doesn’t quite sound right. Irritated. Tired. Definitely doesn’t sound fine. I don’t move.

“I wasn’t exactly expecting this to be easy. I’m still not sure if I believe I’m talking to the real you.”

I fall to the side when the wall containing the room disappears. I curl in on myself and wait. I need to know who it is. I need to know what new thing the memories are offering me now. If I can ignore it, maybe I won’t have to deal with it for a while.

“How are the boys? I know I said I’d come over, but—”

The voice cuts off, and now footsteps join it. I think I might know who it is, and I don’t know if I can handle a projection of Jay telling me how wrong I am. How I can’t complain because they told me there were better ways to do this.

They told me and they were right.

“Holy shit, I think that’s him.”

I finally uncover my face and open bleary eyes. A figure approaches—sound says at a jog, but I really can’t tell—but I don’t move to greet them. I wait to see what they’ll say. To see if they’ll be nice or not.

“Connor?”

A hesitant hand touches my arm and quickly disappears. They lean close until I can almost actually make out the details of their face. It definitely looks like them. Maybe splinters of Jess project correctly.

“Can you sit up?”

I don’t really want to, but I force myself upright and rub my eyes. Maybe I’ll actually be able to see the flaws in my memories if I can see straight.

Ha.

“Yeah. Yes, D, I found him. Tell j355 to get back on the line.”

A crackle of sound from whatever device they have. I blink at them, but my vision is still blurry. If I give it a few minutes, they should go back to normal.

“I know. Yes. 65%. We’ll find out when I get back.”

“Goodie,” I mutter. “Another daring rescue attempt.”

They still.

“Scratch that. 90%.” They stoop down next to me. “How many times has someone tried to get you out?”

I rub my eyes again while I think on it.

“Lost count,” I eventually say.

“Will you walk with me, at the very least?”

They crouch on their heels with a hand extended to me. If I say no, will they go away? Will I have a minute for my mind to just be here, wherever here ends up being? Just a minute without a projection trying to give me false hope?

I sigh and take their hand. It’s better than being alone.

They reach up with their other hand to touch their ear.

“Make sure no one enters the lab without my express permission.”

They stand and pull me up after them. I’m almost surprised that I don’t sway. They immediately start forward and I follow at their side. I’ll humor them until they phase out like the others. They have good intentions, even if they aren’t real.

“How long has it been since you and Jordan split apart?”

Jordan?

I stare blankly at them and realize my vision has returned mostly back to normal. They don’t look altered at all. That’s almost scarier than if I’d been given proof that they’re just an image. The idea that they might actually be here is too dangerous to entertain.

It’ll hurt more when they turn out not to be.

“The other half of you?” Jay prompts.

They aren’t supposed to know about that. My double went back, he should have returned and taken on who we were to make it easier for everyone else. That’s what I would have done. If they think he has a different name—if they know about him at all—this can’t really be them.

I answer anyway.

“I don’t know. Time doesn’t work right here.”

“If it helps you remember,” they offer. “I’ve been looking for you for five days and he’d been in the Cube for a week before coming to me.”

“About three weeks, then,” I amend. “Why did he come to you?”

“He inherited the power of manipulation. He wanted me to help him control it.”

No.

I stop and let my hand fall out of theirs. There are more and more strikes against this really being them. Of course my biggest fears would come to haunt me like this. A blessing of a rescue coming with the knowledge that, not only did Jordan reject the plan we’d made, he’s still just as capable of relapsing into unhealthy control as I am.

“Connor?”

I shake my head.

“We have to go back. I can tell without even running any tests, you’re unstable.”

They’re so worried. They believe they’re real. That they can get me out. That there’s any way I could leave the memories now. I’ve been replaced, and everyone’s safe and everyone’s fine. That has to be the truth, so they can’t really be here.

“You’re going to fall apart if you stay here. You’ll disappear.”

“Good!”

Their breath catches, and I’ve never seen Jay so scared. Not even when Jess almost died. They stare at me, gaze not wavering when an indistinct voice chatters through their com.

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do,” I growl. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to hold it together if they stay here. “Now leave.”

“You don’t mean that,” they repeat. They speak firmer this time. Either they know something or they’re trying to convince us both.

“Please. Just go.” I take a step back, but they follow.

“If you meant it,” their voice cracks, but their stare is too intense for me to think of them as uncertain. “I wouldn’t have a choice about it, would I?”

Any argument I might have dries up in my throat.

They nod and finally look away. They dig in their coat. Before they even withdraw their hand, a door appears in front of them.

“If I had any sense, I wouldn’t have wasted time talking.” They jam a key in the door and jerk it open. “Thought it might be jarring to go straight back, but I obviously have terrible judgement out here.”

They hold the door open for me, and I stare through it. The fluorescent lights of the lab wink back at me. It could still be a trick. Another trick of the memories to keep me from even thinking about finding a way out.

Still, if this is real, there’s someone unconscious on their floor. They’re too busy watching me to see them, so I cross the threshold without much hesitation.

“Oh, thank god. Did you—” The voice over the intercom cuts off.  “Which one are you?”

“Connor.”

J355 sighs in relief as I kneel at beside the limp body on the floor. It’s D, Dirk’s older brother. I don’t even get a chance to check whether or not he’s injured before Jay drops down on his other side and presses two fingers into his neck.

Their sigh of relief calms me down just a little.

“What happened?” they call, turning their sharp gaze into the air. “Where’s Jordan?”

“Gone.”

“What do you mean, gone?” Jay hisses. “Disable the scramblers for ten seconds.”

They turn their attention back to D to press their hand against his forehead. The flow of emotion in the room spikes, a mess of anxiety and frustration, and D jerks upright.

“Holy fuck,” he gasps.

After a second, he scrambles to his feet without looking at either of us.

“Where’d he go?”

“He ran into the memories. I couldn’t stop him, I—” j355 pauses and a soft whir overtakes the intercoms for a second. My ability to sense the others’ emotions vanishes once again. “I’m sorry.”

“Damn.”

D turns back to us, and I can’t quite make out his eyes behind his shades. His flinch upon seeing me is almost imperceptible, but I think he knows it’s me. He doesn’t immediately accuse me of anything, at least. Instead, he turns to Jay to offer them a hand.

“I let slip why you ran out.” He tugs them to their feet, but I don’t wait for anyone else’s help before reconfiguring myself to be upright. “He panicked or something, I don’t know. S’the last thing I remember, at least.”

“He used you to disable my drone,” j355 explains. “Then you collapsed. Christ. I had to check your vitals to be sure you weren’t dead.”

“Sorry,” I mutter. At the slight frown D directs at me, I continue. “I fucked up. This whole thing was pointless and stupid, Jordan wouldn’t even be here if I wasn’t so—”

“There’s nothing you can do about it now.” Jay pushes past me into the lab. They call out into the empty space. “Where are you?”

“Table D9. I fell out of camera sight, so I’m not sure if I’m under the table or—”

“Here.” They duck under a table and pick up a drone. “You shouldn’t have to use one of these soon. Let’s get you up and running again.”

They wander into another room without looking back, so I’m left alone with a vastly older version of Dave than I’ve ever talked to. He looks after them with a deep frown. I didn’t know they were close.

“Hal wanted me to ask if you’d tell him about the memories,” he says without warning. It takes me a second to even realize he’s talking to me. “I have a feeling he’ll just swipe Jay’s files after they talk to you about it, but still.”

He shifts his weight and looks at me over his shades. There’s something unnerving about seeing an aged version of one of your friends. Something strange and uncomfortable, and I can’t help but like him immediately.

“Yeah, I—” I clench my fists until my nails dig into my palm. “Once I convince myself I’m really here, I’ll swing by.”

“Good. No running back out there, right?” He turns back to lab at large to watch the door Jay left through, so I can’t read him again. “A lot of folks would be pretty pissed if you turned right around and got yourself lost again.”

“How the hell did you end up being Jay’s friend?” I grumble.

“Ah, well.” He rubs the back of his neck and makes a face. “I came by after everything with the asshole version of Dave’s bro. They let me bring everyone else, now I always seem to be finding myself back here.”

Huh. Jay’s been holding out on me.

“Then again,” he muses. He tilts his head to look back at me with a rueful smile. “Bro and I have unofficially adopted half the Cube by now. With Jess caring so much about them, Roxy and the Captors hacking into their servers—and don’t even get me started on the rest of The Collective getting all catty about whatever the hell they’re doing back here—all that on top of Dirk and Hal poking around for parts, I’d’ve found my way here eventually.”

What the fuck? The Strider’s are looking out for everyone now? When the hell did that happen?

I cover my face with my hands and lean back against a table with a shaky laugh.

“God, I’m so out of the loop.”

“Wait ‘til you see the map the other kids are putting together.” He ruffles my hair and, god, I think D Strider just claimed me as a part of his family, what the fuck?

My legs buckle, but a chair I distinctly remember there not being catches me. This can’t be real. This is like the Cube I left, but swapped around and made different. I shake my head against the thought, but I can’t keep my mouth from opening.

“We’ve left the alpha timeline.”

D barks a laugh, and even Jay and j355 join in. The sound crowds around me, and I’m scared to move my hands or open my eyes. The prospect of finding out this was another piece of fiction bestowed by the memories is too painful. What would I even do?

Am I even capable of getting out anymore? Maybe I’m just a part of the memories now.

The laughter stops, I don’t know if it even lasted longer than a few seconds, but the silence is worse. It tells me it’s gone. I’m going to open my eyes and it’ll just be dark, maybe another projection of Jess waiting for me to talk to it. The disappointment is already too much to handle, and I haven’t even confirmed it.

Then, it’s not quiet anymore.

J355 whirs and thanks Jay, the distinct sound of a drone buzzing through the air joining their soft conversation. It sounds like D joined them further away, but I didn’t hear him leave. The Striders can just do that, I guess.

“I don’t have a way to track him,” Jay says, finally loud enough for me to make out. “He could already be swallowed in the memories, we don’t know.”

“Any chance he might come back on his own?”

The pause is just long enough for me to answer.

“No.” I uncover my eyes and locate the trio all the way across the room. “He thinks he’s a danger to everyone in the Cube. That we could fuse back together if we’re not careful. Even if we don’t, the two of us in one place with the kind of manipulation we have—”

“Connor.” J355’s voice washes over me, soothing and calm. I rein myself in.

“I’m just saying. He’s not coming back.”

“You’re right, sounds just like Dirk,” D mutters. Jay smacks his arm, earning a shrug. “Just sayin’, you can’t go blaming every little thing another version of you does on yourself. Jess doesn’t even do that, and they’re—well.”

He makes a gesture at the room at large.

Yeah, they’ve got plenty of versions of themself that have done shitty things. They’ve got plenty of versions of themself, period. I don’t know how they manage to keep everything straight or in order. I can barely handle having one.

“Dirk catches himself in the same cyclical thinking.” He raises a hand, stops himself, and starts again. “Or, everyone else catches him and he backpedals. Can he blame alternate versions of himself for doing crap he would never do? Is the fact that he’s scared of doing that a sign that he’s a good one? Then it goes to, thinking he’s a good one might be a sign of a shitty one’s ego, and on and on.”

“We’ve been working on that,” Jay chides. “Jess gets a lot of those guides to break out of negative cycles of thought, they help.”

They go back and forth like this awhile. I guess they’re both pretty interested in the well-being of the younger Striders. They mention the two versions of Dave, but then the alternate version of his brother comes up and the topic is dropped altogether.

The longer I’m here, the more convinced I am that it’s real.

I dig my nails into the arms of the chair just to prove I can, then lift my hands to stare at the marks left in the fabric. Cause and effect, it works here. I do it again and again on different parts of the chair, then I stand.

Jay and D both fall silent to look at me. I don’t know what they see, but I know for a fact I’m hyperventilating. I stare at them.

Then I seize a stack of papers from the table I’ve been sitting next to and throw it into the air. Jay objects, but j355 says something I don’t quite catch to shut them up.

I’m too busy watching the papers fall. And they do fall. They don’t just phase out or drop like rocks, don’t warp the air around them or change the surrounding room other than the complete mess they make. The papers fall how paper is supposed to.

I choke out a sound, and I’m not sure if it’s a laugh or a sob until it comes again. This time, when I fall to my knees I do land on the floor. I cover my mouth against the hysterical, hiccupping laughs. There’s nothing I can to about the hot tears squeezing past my eyes.

I’m out.

I’m here, this is the Cube.

Jay and D kneel at my side and try to get me to talk to them, but I can’t. I can’t even begin to find the words. There’s nothing I can say to relate this to them.

I’m home.

[a-wayofthinking]

Pt 2. It's never mentioned (as far as I know) that a wife can beat her husband “lightly.” I just think that making any kind of abuse (no matter how light) permissible in a marriage is very dangerous and futile. I really hope none of this sounded rude. I’m not trying to bash the religion in any way, I’m just trying to get answers as this has been a huge roadblock for me.

Im sorry it took me so long to reply to you, i just wanted to really concentrate and do my best in answering you correctly. You didnt sound rude at all, and i didnt take your questions as something offensive in any way (please dont worry about things like these when talking to me, i barely ever get offended). Contrary to that actually, im glad youre keen on finding out and asking about it. You are right, violence does not belong to a marriage at all. However, the scholars have said that this “beat them (lightly, if it is useful)” does not actually mean that he should beat her, but that it is a light tap; like gently tapping with a miswak (i actually tried this on myself once, and it didnt hurt at all). The word “beating” doesnt explain it even nearly well enough, because normally when we talk about beating we refer to those “men” that hit and hurt their wives, which is definitely not allowed. Islam forbids beating women and warns strictly against it.But you realized this, so lets move on to the part in Quran that talks about the topic. “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women…. As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Ever Most High, Most Great.” [Qur’an 4:34 – Muhsin Khan Translation]If a wife and a husband have an argument, and she has done something that goes against the rights of the husband, he has to talk to her about it first. “Youve done this and that, and these offended me so would you please not repeat it?”. So that is the first step, and usually in a healthy relationship this sort of kind speech solves it. However, if the problem continues; she keeps doing the same thing over and over again, he takes another step - refuses to share the bed with her. Now this is a bit stricter than the former one, because he has already tried verbally solving the problem but she doesnt listen. That gentle tap, “beating”, is only mentioned as the third option, if it is useful. This “beating” should be done without hurting her, without bruising her. This last step is only to show the severity of her transgression - “ive had enough, youve constantly been persistent on doing this wrong thing x”, it is not meant to be humiliating, forcing or causing pain. He is her protector and maintainer, and this includes him warning her from sins. When he has tried all the other ways of getting her to stop her wrong actions, and if she still persist then he takes this gentle tap as a last resort. So it is to be used only if the wife really does not change her behaviour after the two first stages; this is not to be taken as a first step. And i think that usually, in a healthy relationship with two people of sound mind, the first two steps should make the problem clear and have the spouses fix it. Yes, that gentle tap is allowed, but it is not mandatory. Muslims should strive to follow the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, who never hit a woman. Did this help at all? Please ask again if youre still confused. And if you have any more questions, please feel free to ask me. And dont let something like this stand in the way of you and Islam, this is definitely not as big of a deal as people often make it seem like. Ive been a muslim all my life, and im a girl too, but ive never been afraid that my future husband would beat me (or even just tap, because we’d simply communicate about the problem and if im wrong id fix it) if he truly is a righteous muslim (meaning there are men that beat their wives, but that is more of a upbringing/cultural/sickness thing, not a religious one at all). Anyone should please feel free to correct me if ive said anything at all thats wrong in any level, may Allah bless you. and may Allah guide you and give you whats good. anything i have said that is good is from Allah, but if ive said anything wrong then it’s from me.

[opheliagardinier]

Breathe.

Thank you so much to Anya (@ladyvivienneloyola) and Issy (@gabriellapatterson) for the plane RPs! I had a great time!

Word count: 1569

(Warning: swearing)

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

I ran my fingertips along the dark circles beneath my eyes as I stared at myself in the mirror. It had been nearly two weeks since I’d properly slept. Between the stress of the Selection and everything with Christian I hadn’t found the time or will.  Things had gotten so bad I had started biting my nails again, something which I hadn’t done in years.

Breath. Breathe. Breathe.

That morning was a blur between officials making sure we stayed on schedule and my family fussing over me. At some point I wandered out of my room, only to immediately be descended upon by the masses.

“Make sure you’re careful around that boy, okay?” My grandmother asked me as she put up my hair- because apparently, I was incapable of doing so on my own. “I don’t like all this business with that girl in the magazines.”

“Grandma,” I sighed. “You know that there’s always more to a story than a photo. The truth rarely sells.”

She clicked her tongue, seeming to choose to ignore my comment. Hadn’t my face been splashed across the papers with false headlines enough for her to learn? Hell, the photo wasn’t even clear enough to definitively determine it was actually the prince. But there was no reasoning with her.

“Have you heard from Christian?” She wondered in an innocent tone, as she placed the final bobby pins in my hair.

“No.” I shook my head. “He’s very busy.”

That was only half true. We hadn’t spoken since that day we’d gone swimming and the silence between us was eating me alive. Even if we hadn’t always gotten to talk to one another every day there had never been radio silence between us.

After a very short final breakfast as a family- which I couldn’t bring myself to eat- I set off towards the city square with my mother. There were words from the mayor and enough photographs taken to last me a lifetime. Despite everything, I put on a brave face, determined to look happy and presentable.  But then the goodbyes came.

My mom had been mostly silent that morning, as I had expected her to be. But as the morning had gone on I began to see the cracks form in her appearance and I realised this is why my grandma had insisted she and my grandfather stay back. They had wanted us to spend those final moments together- just the two of us- before I was whisked away.

I turned to my mother to give her one last hug goodbye. To my surprise tears had started pooling in her eyes, catching me off guard.

“Oh, mama.” I wrapped my arms around her and held her tightly. “Don’t cry.”

“Please be careful, Ophelia.” She begged me, as she began to sob.

At first, I did my best to not cry, but I couldn’t fight off the tears for long.

I stood there, with my arms wrapped around her, never wanting to let go. The feeling of not knowing when I would see her again had hit me full force. I had never been away from her for more than two weeks in my entire life.

“I will, mommy, I promise.”

I tried to memorise everything about that moment. The smell of her perfume. The way the curls of her hair felt beneath my fingertips. The way her arms felt around me as she held me close- a feeling I’d taken for granted my entire life.

And then I had to let go.

I looked back and waved to her as I approached the terminal entrance. She waved back as she watched me disappear.

When I arrived at our meeting point in Angeles one of the other girls was already there, waiting in the terminal.

“Sorry, not the best with names,” she told me as I approached. “I’m Gabriella from Angeles?”

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Just be yourself- or maybe not. No, be yourself for sure. Just much less tired.

“I’m Fee- Ophelia, your neighbour from Sonage.” I smiled and held out my hand to her.

Gabriella looked at my hand for a moment before reaching out to take my hand.

She repeated her name again as I went to sit down. I smirked to myself as thought about the strangeness of the situation.

“And now we wait.” I looked around. Gabriella followed my lead and went to sit as well.

“So Ophelia, what do you do?” Gabriella asked.

I scrunched up my nose as I heard her say my name. The only person who ever called me Ophelia was my mother and that was when she was angry. But all the same, I told her my family owned a vineyard then asked what she did.

“Uh..im a freeloader. Currently at least.” She responded. “I live with my parents”

I chuckled and told her that I still was living at home too before she asked if I liked my work. There were so many things I could have said, but of course, I had to be my normal smart-ass self.

“I get to drink wine every day- so what do you think?” I asked in a sarcastic tone, giving her a smile.

”Yup that sounds pretty great.” Gabriella laughed along. “The only time I get wine is when there's some of the box wine left over but my dad already got my mom a new box.”

“Oh, sweetheart, that's no way to have wine.” I shook my head in disbelief. “ We're going to have to change that.”

We continued making small talk for another minute or two before our hold up arrived. And let me tell you, it was some entrance. The last girl sauntered in wearing an outfit that matched both mine and Gabriella’s only she’d chosen to accessorise it in a way that told us she wasn’t here to mess around. As she approached us I looked her up and down, before glancing over at Gabriella, who was leaning back in her seat with a look of indifference.

“Got a good look at me, girls?”

Gabriella said yes, then asked how long it had taken her to get ready. I just smirked and rolled my eyes.

“Enough time to be presentable in front of everyone.” She said with a shrug.

“Congratulations,” I told her.

Gabriella offered her hand and introduced herself. The blonde introduced herself as Odette. Ah, that was right.

“I'm Fee,” I announced, raising my hand.

“Oh! That's what you said earlier. A nickname I assume?” Gabriella asked.

“Short for...?” Odette nodded at me, raising an eyebrow.

“Ophelia.” My head bobbed in response.

“Wait... Ophelia... like "to be or not to be"...?” Odette snorted as she gave me an amused look. Every fucking time.

Why could people never seem to get over it? There were plenty of Juliets in the sea but no one ever said a damn thing. And let’s be real- she died a much more dramatic death than Ophelia- even if they both ended their lives over men.

So she’d already irked me which meant I, of course, had to come up with a response. Fuck taking the high road. I was too tired and stressed. And anyway, her name was Odette, so who was she to be acting like I had some ridiculous and far-fetched name?

“Odette... Like I turn into a swan at night and dance...?” I asked her.

Gabriella made another remark or two, while Odette got in her two cents. I sort of zoned out for a minute, as the haze from my lack of sleep worsened.

“So Swan-girl, what do you do for work?” Gabriella inquired

I rolled my eyes as I tried to keep from laughing. Gabriella was beginning to grow on me.

“Me? I'm from Vegas, try to guess.” Odette tilted her head in amusement.

“Stripper?” I suggested. Fuck. Why are you like this? I glanced over at Gabriella again, who smirked back at me.

“That would be why she dances at night.” She agreed, making me laugh.

It turned out Odette worked in a casino, which was slightly disappointing. I’d been hoping I’d guessed correctly.

We chatted a bit more before departing for the palace. I found out I was by far the oldest of the three of us, along with the fact that Odette was more than sure of herself.

Thankfully the drive was short, but any hopes I had resting were swiftly dashed because we were all rushed to the stylists.

Over the years I’d alternated between various browns to shades of blonde so I wasn’t too upset when my stylist announced the wanted to go with a dirty blonde colour. I nodded and told him that I trusted him.

“What do you think if we cut it to here?” One stylist said, holding up a few strands. They’d already washed the dye out by that point and I was too exhausted to care.

“She’ll  look like she’s twelve.” Said another, scowling. “No, we’ll cut it to here.”

It went on for what felt like an eternity, as did the rest of the day. Eventually, I asked an aide for some sleeping pills, which I was given without hesitation.

As my eyelids began to feel heavy thoughts of Christian ran through my mind, which I quickly waved away. Now wasn’t the time, especially when I was meeting Benjamin in the morning,

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

[korean-language-amino]

Past, Present and Future Tenses

Hellor~ So the most voted topic which I should explain were the tenses. I’ll explain this then I’ll do the lyrics and finally, “plans”. Okay well I hope you like this long lesson.

Let’s start!

Past

(았/었/였다)

To change a present-tense Korean verb into a past-tense Korean verb, add 았/었/였 to the end. 았 is added to verbs with 오 or 아 as their last vowel:

잡다 (catch)       잡았다 (caught)

놀다 (play)         놀았다 (played)

오다 (come)       왔다 (came)

And 었다 is added to verbs with any other vowel (어, 우, 이, 으) as their last vowel.

먹다 (eat)                         먹었다 (ate)

예쁘다 (to be pretty)       예뻤다 (was beautiful)

숨다 (hide)                       숨었다 (hid)

잡히다 (to be caught)     잡혔다 (was caught)

였다 is only added to 하다.

하다 (do)             했다 (did)

았다 is also added to verbs ending in 아, but it is shortened to 갔다 to save those few seconds. Likewise, 사다 becomes 샀다. Verbs ending in 오 like 오다 gets 았다 added right to that last syllable, so it becomes 왔다. 쏘다 becomes 쐈다. In cases like this where it’s awkward to try to say 쐈다, you can just use 쏘았다. However, 왔다 is never 오았다.

가다 (go)           갔다 (went)

사다 (buy)         샀다 (bought)

오다 (come)      왔다 (came)

쏘다 (shoot)     쐈다 or 쏘았다 (shot)

Similiar rules apply for verbs ending in 어,우 or 이. 어 absorbs the 어 in 었다, 우 becomes 웠다, and 이 becomes 였다.

서다 (stand)                 섰다 (stood)

피우다 (to smoke)       피웠다 (smoked)

두다 (keep)                  뒀다 (kept)

피다 (to bloom)           폈다 (bloomed)

Verbs ending in 으 normally lose the 으 because it’s a weak vowel sound and easily pushed around by stronger vowel sounds. If the 으 is the only vowel, then you get rid of it and use 었다.

쓰다 (to use)           썼다 (used)

There are a very small number of cases where 으 is the ending of the second syllable in the multi-syllable word. In these cases, it disappears and you use a 았다 or 었다 depending on the vowel in the first syllable.

모으다 (to collect)      모았다 (collected)

Past past

(았/었/였었다)

So the past tense tells us that something is finished, but if you really want to emphasize just how finished an event is, you can double the past tense. 았/었/였었다 can be added to a verb to show that it was true in the past, but that it’s long over and completely done with now.

*All these sentences are informal*

작년에 부산에 갔었어요.

I went to Busan last year. (but came back)

어렸을 때 미국에서 살았어요.

When I was a child, I lived in the US. (but I no longer do)

이 회사에 취직하기 전에 다른 회사에 면접을 봤었어요.

I had interview with another company before I got a job at this company.

나는 영어를 잠깐 배웠었요.

I learnt English for a short time. (but I no longer do)

You can also, as a joke, just keep on repeating 었었었었 as long as you’d like during your sentence; this further emphasizes the fact that whatever you’re talking about is really, definitely, absolutely, positively no longer true.

Past, present and future

(으)ㄴ, 는, (으)ㄹ

은 is the past tense marker for verbs ending in consonants, ㄴ is the past tense marker for verbs ending in vowels, 는 is the present tense marker for anything, 을 is the future tense marker for verbs ending in consonants, and ㄹ is the future tense marker for verbs ending in vowels. Adjectives (descriptive verbs) are almost always conjugated using (으)ㄴ.

These markers are a short, convenient way of turning verbs into adjectives.

온 사람           the person who came

오는 사람       the person who is coming

올 사람           the person who will come

먹은 음식       the food that was eaten

먹는 음식       the food that is being eaten

먹을 음식       the food that will be eaten

예쁜 여자       beautiful woman

작은 남자       small man

In addition to being used that way, the above markers are also part of many grammatical expressions. They are considered part of the expression and you will learn them along with the rest of the expression. Some expressions ([으]ㄹ 수 있다/없다, [으]ㄹ 것이다, many of the expressions used to make guesses or plans, etc.) can be used only in certain tenses while others ([으]ㄴ/는/[으]ㄹ 듯이, [으]ㄴ/는/[으]ㄹ 때, etc.) can be used in any tense. You’ll have to choose your tense marker according to what you’re trying to convey.

One big difference between (으)ㄴ and 던 is that with (으)ㄴ, the action is always completely finished and over with. (This is not true of descriptive verbs: a 예쁜 여자 is still 예쁜 at the time the sentence was formed.) You could say 제가 하던 일 if you were talking about something you were working on earlier (which may or may not have been finished), but you can’t call it 한 일 unless it’s all done.

It’s extremely easy to get confused, particularly with ㄴ and ㄹ, as to whether the ㄴ or ㄹ you see is a past or future tense marker, or just the end of a word. This is particularly true with words like 한 of 한 일 above, where 한 has many other meanings besides 하다 plus ㄴ. There’s really no easy way to distinguish the words in this case; it’s really just a matter of practice and familiarity.

Note as well that the past, present, or future tense marker with (으)ㄴ/는/(으)ㄹ compares the time of that action to what’s happening im the rest of your sentence. So if clause A happened before clause B, use (으)ㄴ regardless of what tense your sentence is in relative to the present.

늦게 온 사람이 계��� 미안하다고 했어요.

The person who was late kept on apologizing.

늦게 온 사람이 계속 미안하다고 해요.

The person who was late keeps on apologizing.

If A and B happen at the same time, use 는 regardless of B’s tense.

늦게 오는 사람이 계속 미안하다고 했어요.

The person who was late kept on apologizing.

늦은 사람이 계속 미안하다고 해요.

The person who was late keeps on apologizing.

The future

(으)ㄹ 것이다, 겠다

There are two expressions most commonly used to talk about the future in Korean. 겠다 is simple to use but a bit more limited, while (으)ㄹ 것이다 is a willing, cheerful participant in almost any phrase. Let’s look at (으)ㄹ 것이다 first.

(으)ㄹ 것이다 can be used for just any statement about the future, no matter who’s doing it or why. You can add it to any kind of verb. 을 것이다 is added to verbs ending in consonants and ㄹ 것이다 is added to verbs ending in vowels. For nouns, it’s better to use 되다 (to become) and then conjugate that with ㄹ 것이다. See the third example sentence below.

This is conjugated as (으)ㄹ 거예요 in 존댓말 and (으)ㄹ 거야 in 반말. If you need to be super-polite, just conjugate (으)ㄹ 것이다 correctly: (으)ㄹ 것입니다. However, this somewhat less common. Here are the basic forms of (으)ㄹ 것이다 plus the polite and 반말 forms.

_____________

Action verbs ending in a vowel

하다

Future:

할 것이다 - 문어체 (writing)

할 거예요 - 존댓말 [해요체] (informal polite)

할 거야 - 반말 (casual)

Action verbs ending in a consonant

먹다

Future:

먹을 것이다

먹을 거예요

먹을 거야

Descriptive verbs ending in a vowel

예쁘다

Future:

예쁠 갓이다

예쁠 거예요

예쁠 거야

Descriptive verbs ending in consonants

작다

Future:

작을 것이다

작을 거예요

작을 거야

Nouns ending in a vowel

남자

Future:

남자일 것이다

남자일 거예요

남자일 거야

Nouns ending in a consonant

물

Future:

물일 것이다

물일 거예요

물일 거야

_____________

And here are some examples

파티에 늦게 올 거예요. (informal polite)

파티에 늦게 올 거야. (casual)

I’ll come to the party late.

그 치마를 입으면 예쁠 거예요. (informal polite)

그 치마를 입으면 예쁠 거야. (casual)

If you wear that skirt, you’ll be beautiful.

가영이는 의사가 될 거예요. (informal polite)

가영이는 의사가 될 거야. (casual)

Kayoung is going to be a doctor.

(으)ㄹ 거예요 and (으)ㄹ 게요 are very similar, and it’s easy to confuse one for the other. The difference is that (으)ㄹ 게요 depends more on your listener. With (으)ㄹ 거예요 you’re simply stating what you think will happen in the future, whereas (으)ㄹ 게요 has more of a connection of “I’m going to do~ (if it’s okay with you).” (으)ㄹ 게요 can also be used when you’re making/changing your plans as a result of what the other person has said. Either way, it always has something to do with that other person’s reaction. (으)ㄹ 거예요, on the other hand, has nothing at all to do with what the other person says.

As for 겠다, it’s more commonly used with formal Korean (습니다, 입니다, etc.) You can use it to talk about your own or someone else’s intentions for the future, especially if you or they are quite determined to carry out these intentions. You can’t normally use it with sentences about the future that are not describing someone’s intentions; in these cases you should use (으)ㄹ 것이다.

Additionally, 겠다 is often used to make guesses, much like 나/(으)ㄴ가 보다 or (으)ㄹ 것 같아. You’ll often hear Koreans say things like “맛있겠다!” upon seeing a plate of food or 아프겠다!” upon seeing a friend wearing a cast on their arm. This doesn’t mean that they’re anticipating future pain for the person; it’s just a way of making a guess. 맛있겠다 means “Looks good!” and “아프겠다 means “Looks painful!”

Finally, there are a few idiomatic expressions with 겠다. The most common are 모르겠다 and 알겠다 (“I don’t know” and “I know”, or more accurately, “I understand”). This has nothing to do with the future or with guessing; it’s just said.

As for conjugation, simply add 겠 to any action or descriptive verb regardless of its ending. Just like (으)ㄹ 것이다, nouns are normally followed by 되다 and then 겠다 (so, 되겠다).

Here are some examples.

늦겠어요.

You’re going to be late.

어디로 가시겠어요?

Where would you like to go?

괜찮겠어요?

Will you be okay?

_______________

- Member  фвᴇвᴇф

Original Post

[myectjourney]

ECT procedure #19 (5/21/2018)

This is my nineteenth electro-convulsive therapy procedure & my seventh bilateral procedure.

Pre-treatment analysis:

I've been doing really great lately. I've had optimism i never thought id feel ever in my life and the urge to do things other than nap or watch t.v. all the time and that's an odd feeling.

Since I started getting the bilateral procedures though, i’ve notice SOME trouble with my long term memory but that was to be expected. Things like...where do I keep my Tupperwares? How do I normally make a certain type of meal? What way do I usually go to get to the grocery store? But none of it has been so bad that I'm worried.

I have been over thinking what my doctor said about whether or not im actually getting better or just manic. I came to the conclusion i am getting better. :)

Post-treatment:

Wow...I feel great mentally. I have never felt so optimistic in my whole entire life.

I woke up from the procedure with a really bad headache and feeling a little discombobulated as well as a little off balance but that is probably the only (not even that bad) slightly negative thing I can even say about today.

I honestly was surprised because yesterday I thought “this is great! this is as good as it gets!” but I can’t even believe...I’m blown away...by how I feel EVEN BETTER today.

I hope anyone who is considering this treatment sees this and understands that even if it takes some time and there are some side effects, it’s worth it. I am living proof that this procedure is effective and works. I never thought I’d end up saying that.

Okay, so I asked my ECT doctor today about whether or not it is okay to smoke both tobacco and weed/either or (I have fibromyalgia so that means sometimes I am in a lot of pain) and he said it was okay as long as I don’t do it 12 hours before treatment. I thought maybe I should add that for everyone else possibly reading this. I also confirmed this answer with ANOTHER one of my ECT doctors who finally gave me a call back since I left a message asking this at her office before I went to treatment today. SO, it’s double confirmed. She did warn me that tobacco is a depressant so it’s not the best idea to smoke because it might make my depression worse again BUT that it wasn’t something I absolutely CAN’T do.

I really hope this gives someone hope that things can get better. Even if you have to do maintenance treatments, it’s not that often and I repeat: IT’S WORTH IT if it works. 

Results:

Long-term Memory Questions: Answered all questions correctly with minor hesitation.

Short-term Memory Questions: Answered all but one question correctly with moderate hesitation.

Slow cognition: Yes (moderate)

Memory loss: Yes (minor)

Attention span: Pretty good.

Tiredness: Yes (moderate)

Trouble retaining newer memories: Yes (minor)

Symptoms:

● Headache (moderate)

● Dizzy (minor)

● Nausea (very minor)

~ End of ECT day #19 ~

[nyabi132-blog]

Unique Artist

Okay this is my first ROTG fanfiction, and well it’s not a prompt just something I thought of, and I love winter (even if I can’t go outside and play in the snow). It’s so pretty and I just love it so much.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Rise of the Guardians (not sure if I need this here, but just in case)

Jack has travelled a lot in his 300 years of impromptu isolation. He had the Wind to fly him any place it wanted to take him. He never cared where he went. He just let the Wind take him wherever he needed to go and spread a little snow. It wasn’t like he had any obligations anyway, his schedule was always free. So wherever Jack needed to spread his snowdays, the wind would take him there. He often circled the globe to do his rounds of said snow spreading, routes of which were agreed upon by the other three seasonal spirits.

Despite popular belief, they actually didn’t bother each other much. That isn’t to say they liked each other, but they had a respect for each other's work, because they had similar jobs, and did their seasonal bidding where it made sense. For example, the spirit of summer wouldn’t make it hot in the Himalayas and the spirit of winter wouldn’t make it snow in July, unless it was supposed to snow in certain areas. They wouldn’t get in each other’s way and if they happened to cross paths, they wouldn’t even blink at the other’s direction. Just keep going. It was pointless to fight, they were immortal anyway and they sort of needed one another to flow into the seasons correctly. Plus they all had their own ways of knowing where their magic needed to be spread, weather it be the clouds or the wind. They understood that sometimes their fellow seasonals had reasons for what they did where they did it. They weren’t so gung ho about their seasons that they’d hurt one another for it. So they would accept the rare occasion of snow in mid fall or a bit of heat in December.

Anyway, Jack spread winter and snow all over the world for a very long time. He’s seen almost every place there is to see. From snowy tundras, to deserts. Although he only passes through those at night, he can’t really take too much heat. All the natural landscapes were beautiful. Flowers and sunsets, and the night sky with all the twinkling stars. From silver linings to the sun hitting a glacier or the water or even his ice just right.

Not only that, but he also has seen modern culture develop. People were forever changing, and technology was evolving. As the years progressed, bigger and more modernized buildings and inventions were made. Watching cities be built and people go about their different lives. It’s amazing how none of them ever did the same exact thing everyday and a routine would never once be repeated exactly. There was always something different.

Just like two snowflakes were ever the same.

With so many references there never would be two of the same kind of snowflake. It was impossible for Jack to think of the same thing twice when he thought about one topic it would flurry into a billion things that associated with it.

Jack loved drawing them too, albeit he never had the time to make every little snowflake, just the ones he likes most. He’d draw them in the frost on a window or in a little never ending notebook he kept in his hoodie pocket. He’d never put words to the snowflake, because the drawing was enough. It was unique and it told exactly what or whom it was based off of.

It was also a way to spend the summer months when snow wasn’t often needed or when he just had nothing to do and was bored. He’d draw whatever was on his mind into a snowflake. It was a good way of remaining positive, or at least not brooding about his seemingly sempiternal loneliness.  

It became like a habit more than a hobby. As a winter spirit he was supposed to be cold and emotionless. Jack was a bit wayward though. He wasn’t so much cold and emotionless as he was fun and mischievous. But it wasn’t often that he expressed deep emotions with anyone, it was just his nature. But there were tell-tale signs of what he was actually feeling and people who knew him knew what they were. Like when he was bored he’d draw snowflakes.

But no one really knew him.

So when he was at the North Pole with nothing to do, because he’d already pranked the yetis one too many times today, and froze a bit too many elves for Phil’s liking - even though sometimes he was grateful for not having to deal with those delusional imbeciles. He was sent to an area in the globe room as to not disturb anyone and to wait for North.

It was late spring and he didn’t have much to do, and he didn’t want to be in a hot place, so North decided that he should come to the work shop and just relax there for a while. Keyword: decided. Jack really didn’t have a choice.

But the big man was now working on toys leaving Jack to his devices. Which didn’t turn out to be such a good idea, because it left many toys to be broken. Not enough to set the ever busy yetis behind schedule, but enough to have North reinforce punishment. North was not going to act like a parent, though he should, he never did. Jack was 300 years old and capable of taking care of himself, but when it came to his own work, he felt it acceptable to lay down some rules. Even if he secretly did find some pranks funny, if he messed up the work by accident consequences would be reinforced to make sure it didn’t happen again.

 He sat at the window sill and absently frosting the window beside him deciding to make another base snowflake. He sketched on the window sill and his frost made it fairly easy to erase and he made multiple angles in different patches of frost. He didn’t know what he was drawing but he’d know once he finished. When he finished a rough sketch on the windowsill, he transferred it to his never ending notebook so he could add details. Every so often trying the designs on the windows first, as to avoid most eraser marks on the paper.

He didn’t get to finish because he felt someone walk into the area he was currently occupying and he turned around. But instead of a large Russian, or fury beast, there was an anthropomorphic rabbit. That threw Jack a bit for a loop, but he guessed it wasn’t unnatural to see the rabbit here. It was a few weeks after Easter, and he could sometimes find the bunny hanging around North’s workshop for insight with his fellow guardian.

“Hey Bunny. What’s up?” Jack greeted casually and letting his notebook slip between him and the windowsill absently.

“I‘m ‘ere on b’half o’ North, ya gumby.” the rabbit said crossing his arms and standing a bit taller.

“ But it’s May. North can’t be busy.” Jack said and cocked his head in a curious jester.

“Do ya know how many toys ya broke, Frostbite?” Bunny continued ignoring Jack. So that’s what this was about. It was really not a big deal. He hadn’t seen the Russian after the incident, but he figured on of his furry helpers told him. Bunny must have been there when he did and when North decided to blow it off like he’d normally do, Bunny didn’t like it. The rabbit always had a way of staying on track, no matter what. North wouldn’t do anything in this situation, but Bunny would.

“As I said it’s May. It doesn’t matter now.” Jack said and nodded his head as if agreeing with himself and started to focus his attention back on his highly detailed snowflake. Though he missed Bunny’s indigent stare.

“That ain’t the problem.” Bunny hopped a few steps forward. He wasn’t even sure that Jack was listening to him. “Ya could’ve set ‘im behind schedule.”

“And if I did, why isn’t he the one telling me off?” Jack asked not looking up from his notebook.  Bunny let his ears flatten against his head. Bunny swore he acted more like a 15 year old then a 317 year old.

“But what if it did? ‘e’d ‘ave ta fix the error and couldn’t come ‘ere ta tell ya off.” Bunny reasoned.

“It’s May.” Jack said again but distantly and half heartedly, he’d make this line just right- And just like that his notebook was yanked away by a furry paw.

“Hey!” he said and looked at the irritated bunny, “ I was doing something!” he said and stood up and grabbed his staff that was leaning against the wall and glared at the rabbit.

“Fer ye’re season?” The rabbits asked in a neutral voice.

“Well yeah, sort of.” Jack said like it was obvious. It really wasn’t, but he’s been working on that snowflake for well over an hour dammit. It’s not like it mattered though. No one actually cared what they looked like, it was just him who’d ever know what they truly looked like and represented. Bunny wasn’t ruining anything but his pride. And one and a half hours of drawing.

“Did I mess you up?”

“Yes, you did.”

“Why are ya so mad. It’s only May.” That made Jack stop. Bunny was trying to prove a point. And he did. Jack suppressed the urge to roll his eyes.

“Okay, you proved your point. But I doubt North would want any of my help, I would offer it, but I’d probably make it worse. Then he’d really be behind. And for the record the season could’ve went on without that.” Jack said and Bunny raise a brow and looked at the book. “I mean I don’t need it, but I’m not finished yet so can I have it back.” Jack said rather then asked. He knew bunny would give it back. He wasn’t really paying attention to what the rabbit was doing as he turned back to the window sill.

“Are these snowflakes, Frostbite?” the rabbit asked and Jack swung around seeing Bunny flip through the pages of the incredibly detailed designs. Bunny would be lying if he said he wasn’t impressed, though he wouldn’t admit to any kind of talent, beside freezing stuff, the kid had. The detail in each one was insane. He looked up and the frost teen shrugged.

“I got bored.” the rabbit looked at him more which made him slightly uncomfortable. “It’s really nothing.” Then the rabbit spotted the planning in frost behind the winter spirit. In the temperatures at the North pole it wasn’t unbelievable that the frost stayed longer than usual.

“Fer nothing, it sure took a ton o’ planning, mate.” Bunny said matter of factly gesturing his head to the frost pictures behind him.

“I just didn’t want to get smudges on the paper.” Jack said because it was the truth. His lack of urgency made it easy to believe. Still deep down he was embarrassed someone had seen his private collection of ‘special snowflakes’.

“These are pretty detailed too. Must’ve taken some effort.” the rabbit raised a brow. It was pretty interesting, Jack’s comebacks weren’t as snarky as before. He wanted to see where this went.

Jack only shrugged “Not really. They aren’t really anything like yours or Norths.” Then Jack laughed a little, but there was no bitterness to it, or maybe a little. “Heck, no one even seems to care how they look.” There was some silence between the two for a bit then.

“North would take ya.” Bunny said, and it through Jack for a loop.

“Huh?” was all he could answer with a surprised and curious blick.

“North would like ye’re designs, mate.” Bunny rephrased “So do I.” he smirked at the shocked and disbelieving stare the frost teen was giving him. It was priceless seeing the usually carefree but guarded face so not.

“Wha- You don’t- it’s not-” If Bunny wasn’t getting a kick out of this before he sure was now. See the gracefully smug winter spirit trip over his words was a sight, and a funny one to someone who had a relationship with him like Bunny. He started to laugh and clutching his stomach.

“Wha? Bunny stop laughing! That was a joke right?” Bunny’s laughing died a bit after a while. He looked at the frost teen who had his eyes cast to the side. “You and North… wouldn’t really..?” He mumbled off the rest, but Bunny knew where it was going. In the three years he’s known the winter spirit - and like really known him - he could tell when a few things were off. But Bunny wasn’t much of a comforter, that wasn’t his type. So he tapped his foot twice and a rabbit hole opened beneath Jack and the unsuspecting teen fell through, he heard the indigent gasp and rolled his eyes with a smirk Bunny let himself fall through too.

When they emerged through the hole into the warren Jack seemed to have caught his balance again and gracefully landed on his staff balancing on the hook part.

“What was that for kangaroo?” Jack asked looking at the rabbit who just grabbed him by the hood and ignored the protests and threats of being frozen. He was finally placed down near the paintriver under a shady tree and there were paint brushes in a jar with some paints around it.

“What the heck! Why are we here?” Jack said head and eyes following the rabbit from his place on the grass as he sat next to him and Jack continued to glare at him.

“Would’ja quit complain’en, Frostbite.” the anthropomorphic rabbit said irritably and Jack promptly shut up. Bunny looked around for a second and picked up an egg. As he turned around Jack looked at him with an unamused look, which grew curious when the egg was placed in his hand. He looked back up at Bunny. “The paint brushes ‘re there an’ ys can use the paint river fer the colours you need and ya can mix it ‘ere.” The rabbit put a pallet in his hand that wasn’t holding the egg and pointed to the other materials and then sat down and picked up his own egg to start painting.

Jack’s face turned back to the unamused look and waited for Bunny to look up again.

“Somethin’ wrong, mate?” Bunny looked confused and raised a brow at the frost teen.

“Why are we here? What is this?” Jack said trying to keep his voice down which he had success in but the place where he was sitting was starting to frost over and it expanded.

“Snowflake, ye’re frosting the grass.” Bunny felt the need to point out and smirk.

“Okay, I’m upset. But you threw me down a hole and gave me a pallet and an egg with no context!” He didn’t like telling Bunny his emotions but there was no other way for the rabbit to know. It might’ve not been a big deal, but Jack didn’t like people knowing when he was upset when it actually mattered, because when it mattered the most it would just make others pity him and be upset that they wouldn’t know how to fix it. When it was trivial matters like this, he didn’t mind. He liked to think this was the worst of his problems, but it wasn’t and they both knew that. But they’d pretend for as long as they could.

“There ain’t no context needed, Snowflake.” Bunny smirked and went back to his egg. “Jus’ paint an egg.” Bunny paused to think for a second “Fer North.” he added

“North’s not upset.” Jack groaned.

“Okay, fer me.” Bunny said not looking up from his egg.

“Why would you be upset?” Jack asked irritably.

“Why does someone ‘ave to be upset fer ya ta do yer told?” if you listened closely you could hear the hint of exasperation.

“They don’t I just don’t see the point in this.” Jack mumbled. But they both knew the real reason, or at least Bunny did. Jack didn’t want anyone to be upset. He was the guardian of fun so obviously if no one was upset or sad he didn’t have anything to work with. Bunny understood that.

“‘kay, I’m upset yer talent’s ‘re wastin’ away in tha’ notebook no one’s gonna see.” Bunny said and Jack looked away a little and  Bunny sighed. “Jus’ paint an egg.”

“Just one egg?”

“Yeah, jus’ one.” Bunny agreed. And Jack picked up the paintbrush and started to paint. He decided to draw all the snowflakes that came to mind. Not anything special just to get it over with. He ambraid the background in blues, getting lighter as it went up and then in a darker blue and medium blue and white he painted snowflakes and as the background got lighter the snowflakes got small until about halfway up the egg they completely disappeared. They were fairly simple snowflakes, ones he could draw in seconds but none of them looked the same.

“There.” he showed the egg to the Easter Bunny himself and he smiled a little.

“Not bad, Frostbite.” Bunny smirked.

“Well, I told you I wasn’t good. It’s on you that you wasted one of your eggs.” Jack justified before he could be accused.

“I said they were good.” Bunny said with a bit of amusment.

“You said they weren’t bad.” Jack shot back.

“Which means they were good.”

“No.”

“It’s the same thing.”

“No it’s not.”

Bunny rolled his eyes. “Listen, ye’re good at this.” Bunny got up and walked over to Jack and knelt beside him. “And people may not see ye’re snowflakes, but they aren’t any less pretty, Frostbite.” He handed back the notebook he’d taken earlier and went back to his spot. “Ye’re allowed ta stay and paint more.” Bunny said not looking at Jack and grabbing the egg he was working on instead.

And Jack did stay.

So yeah that’s that! Snowflakes are really really detailed and they are so small. People don’t appreciate how different they are, and in that sense snowflakes are just like people, and that’s cheesy because we’re all different. But also snowflakes are like everyday, that’s confusing but like think about it. Everyday you do something different, even if it’s a routine, something is always different. So each day is like a snowflake. Unique.

[hayjeon]

Give and Take [M] (ft. Taehyung) | 01 prologue

→ friendswithbenefits!au with a twist (edging, oral, overstimulation, uh some really dirty shit, and oh yeah, Taehyung teaching you sex) → 12.6k (oneshot)  → part 1 | part 2 | part 3

A/N: sorry im such a sinner omg but thank you so much for 1k followers + 1k notes on You Who! This is a surprise upload :) Enjoyyyyyyyyy

_______________________________________________________________________

Your thighs are trembling, but he just gives you a glare and continues lazily moving his fingertips against your skin, dipping a knuckle into your heat before slightly pressing his thumb over your clit. 

And repeat. 

“Taehyung,--fuck--please.” You moan, straining against the neckties that bind you to his headboard. 

He props up his chin in his hand in between your legs and glares up at you. The hand in between your legs stills and you groan at the lack of sensation, and clench your teeth. He rolls his eyes. “Can you take this or not?” 

You let out a breath, calming your heavy breaths before loosening your grip on the binds and letting your body relax a bit. Closing your eyes and swallowing your dry throat, you speak up. Your voice is small and hoarse from the previous hour of exertion. “I-I can.” 

“Good. I thought so.” 

He doesn’t say anything and returns his gaze to your center, lowering his lips against your core and thickly running his tongue up your slit, and settling on your clit to suck hard. You cry out, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes as you arch your back. Your body is reacting on its own, unsure of whether to press itself closer to the heat from his mouth and take the pleasure he’s giving you, or to shy away from the onslaught of an orgasm. 

A heavy hand comes down on your hip bone and presses down, rooting you to his bed. He mutters, “You need to learn how to stay still. Buck up again and I won’t let you come for another week.” 

You swallow thickly, eyes rolling back as you drop to the sheets, trying to keep your body as limp as possible. He’s not joking. You focus your entire mind on trying not to buck up again, but it’s difficult when he ducks down again and presses another long, hard suck to your clit before flattening his tongue against it to soothe it. A long finger comes tentatively into your core and you moan loudly when it slides in with no difficulty and presses immediately to the spot that makes your mind go blank. 

Taehyung can feel how you tighten around his finger, and so he reaches up to grasp your breast, pinching the nipple and running his thumb over it because he knows you’re extremely sensitive there. 

Well, to put it correctly, you were sensitive everywhere, he notes with a pause. But he wasn’t about to admit how much that excited him and made his dick twitch in his tight jeans. So he moves his finger faster against you and watches up from between your legs as you throw your head back and your fists clench against the neckties from his high school uniforms he used to bind you to the wooden bars on his bed. 

“T-taehyung,” you begin, and trail off into a moan, and he knows without you having to say it, that its a question of permission. So he grits out against your skin, “Hold it Y/N, wouldn’t want to look like you can’t handle this much for him, don’t you?”

The feeling of his finger inside of you, his thumb on your nipple, his tongue against your clit, and the vibrations of his deep growl against your skin is now too overwhelming. But his words tear you back into reality. 

The both of you, somehow along the way, had become partners, sexually. But contrary to normal progressions of a regular relationship, you and Taehyung were not dating, nor in love, nor flirting, nor anything but friends. But neither was it just for the pleasure, just a friends with benefits relationship that many would assume. No, Taehyung was teaching you for someone else.

It all started when you two were paired up for the horrid end-of-the-year-shitsignment, from what everyone called it, from Mr. Kim’s class in Engineering 160. It was a two-person project that basically was about 40% of the entire grade, for the class that was pivotal in your graduation credits for college. And to your best luck, you were paired up with Kim Taehyung, sex-on-legs, has-a-long-list-of-girls-he-fucked, fuckboy of the century. You’d avoided him and his friends like the plague during your first two years of college, holing yourself up in your room, determined to get perfect grades and graduate this horrible shit hole and move onto a better place like Google or something. 

But cue two weeks of being rude to him and assuming he was a good-for-nothing asshole, but then becoming surprised at how diligent he was and how okay of a friend and guy he was outside the public eye. And so after two more weeks of spending every waking moment together and an A+ later, you and Taehyung had forged some sort of friendship. 

One that wasn’t really typical. The perfect small-town girl with straight A’s ever since elementary school had become a sort of sidekick to the one guy on campus no girl could resist. But you stayed with him because you realized underneath the cockiness and the sex drive, was just a boy who was really kind and sort of funny at times. But also fucking smart, and after a few moments with him, he was quick to catch on to your little crush. 

“Oh my god, you’re in love with him?” He asked, looking up from his graph table to watch you staring off into the entrance where six boys were fooling around quite loudly. Laughing, he tipped back in his chair, drawing attention from the others in the library this late at night. 

“Shut up!” You hissed, throwing your pencil at him. 

“Wow! This is gold, the innocent virginity-on-two-legs is in love with Jeon Jeongguk, the guy on campus who’d fuck anything on two legs?!” At your glare, he held up two hands in defense, “And that’s coming from me, which says a lot about his sexcapades.” 

You roll your eyes and duck your head as you pretend to focus on the article about cloud software engineering. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you snap, “get back to your work, this project isn’t gonna do itself.” 

He smirks, setting his chair legs down with a bang. “Well said, my friend. Cause neither are you. Jeon Jeongguk only does girls who are, how do I say this, skilled in that department. So unless you find a way to do yourself, then I’d say forget about it.” 

“Agh, Kim Taehyung will you shut the fuck up and finish?” You hiss, unable to really say anything back. He was a really fun guy to be around until these moments where he started acting like his fuckboy friends. 

“That’s what she said.” He quipped before returning to drawing another model on the table. And you returned home that night, wondering if what he said was actually true and if you really didn’t have an inkling of a chance with Jeon Jeongguk unless you were laid. 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that you were a virgin. You were a top student, only focusing on getting your grades perfect and your extracurriculars in top shape before coming to this really nice university, only to rinse and repeat. And now you were a junior, 21 years into your life and you could swear your crotch probably had cobwebs or something because you’ve never done anything sexual in your life. 

So it was the night after your professor returned your projects and you accepted the excited hug that Taehyung gave you and his invite to some celebratory drinks at the A+ grade you both received. 

Maybe it was after you got piss drunk and couldn’t really see where you were going and ended up crashing into an even drunker Jeongguk who mistook you as his girlfriend and kissed the heck out of you. Maybe it was the way his tongue moved against you and slipped past your lips as he pressed you against the wall set a fire in your stomach that you couldn’t quench. Maybe it was the way you stumbled into Taehyung, who was really warm and the shorts and t-shirt you had on wasn’t really doing much to keep you insulated in the air-conditioned frat house. 

But nonetheless, you murmured something into his ear that changed the course of your friendship forever. 

“Kim Taehyung, please teach me how to be good at sex.” You drawled into his ear. 

“What the fuck?” He exclaimed, grabbing you away from his body and looking down at your red cheeks and your dinky smile. “Are you okay? Y/N? Hello?” 

You shook him off, “I’m fine! I’m just asking you to please fuck me.” You reached for another cup of beer and he yanked it out of your reach. “Christ, Y/N, you’re fucking drunk as shit. Let’s get you home.” 

“No, Taehyung! I’m serious!” You whined, tipping over dangerously as he steadied you. “I don’t know who else I trust and who else to ask. Just, just please, help me cause I don’t know shit about anything and I just wanna date him and ‘m gonna die a virgin like you tease m’ about all the damn time ‘nd if this doesn’t happen then ‘m doomed.” You slur, before you completely grow limp in his arms and pass out. 

Gritting his jaw, he looks over into the living room, where he sees Jeon Jeongguk making out with his girlfriend of the week, who’s dressed quite similarly to you, and figures out by your smeared lip gloss what’s happened. Rolling his eyes, he leans down and grabs your back and legs, tucking you under his chin as he carries you upstairs into an empty room. He’d just explain to Seokjin later why he ended up sleeping in one of the spare frat rooms. 

But he tucked you in and laid next to you, promising himself he would just rest his eyes a little bit, but then all of a sudden he’s waking up the next morning, groggy and hungover as fuck, and you’re staring at him with determination. 

“I meant what I said last night, Taehyung.” 

Rubbing his face, he sighs. “Are you serious? Where did this come from? It’s not like you to ask me stuff like this. We’ve only been friends for what, two months?” 

You nod furiously, “I know. But I really trust you, because you’ve been nothing but kind and real with me. And I need someone like that to teach me, to tell me what to do better and let me know when I’m not doing something right.” 

When he doesn’t respond, a look of sheer determination comes over your features and Taehyung gawks as you whip off your shirt to reveal a cute little lace bralette that has his heart racing and his dick hardening even more. “Is it cause you don’t think I’m attractive?” Your lip trembles at his unreadable expression, and your expression falls as you slowly move to retrieve your discarded shirt. 

But he grabs your wrist with a growl and presses you into the sheets before the feeling of regret can wash over you and convince your mind that maybe this wasn’t a good idea, as he glares down at you. “No, Y/N, are you fucking kidding me? That’s not why.” 

“Then why won’t you take my virginity Taehyung?” You whisper up at him, still a bit hungover and still a bit nervous.

He groans at how soft your voice gets, the whisper doing horrible things to his morning hard-on. It also doesn’t help that you look absolutely breathtaking even in the morning and a raging hangover. 

“I-I don’t want to hurt you, Y/N. You deserve more than me, you deserve a nice husband to put a ring on it first and then take your virginity, you deserve dates and flowers and shit like that. Shit I can’t do, won’t do, for anyone.” 

You mull his words over and shake your head. “That’s not what I’m asking for. I don’t care about all of that. You once told me every guy always wants to have a friend who he can have sex with, no strings attached? But then like the movies, someone always ends up messing up and falling?” He nods in response, confused at where you’re taking this. 

“Well, then here’s your opportunity. It’ll be give and take. You teach me how to be good at sex so I can finally date Jeongguk, and I can do my best to be a good fuck buddy. And you won’t have to worry about me catching feelings cause you’ll know the reason we started this in the first place.” 

And maybe Taehyung is still a little drunk from the night before, or maybe even a little lightheaded at the way you smell really really good even after becoming drunk enough to pass out. Maybe its the way he gets a little competitive, knowing that this is one of the few times, he gets to fuck a girl first before Jeon Jeongguk gets to her. And maybe your offer is a little too enticing for him after weeks of not being able to get some because of the stupid project. 

So he swoops down with a groan and presses his mouth to you, and although he doesn’t yet take your virginity that morning, he kisses and fingers you into your first orgasm, marking your deal with a silent promise. 

The overwhelming urge to orgasm draws you back into your thoughts and you breathe heavily as your back arches again and you try and twist your hips away from his mouth. But his large hand splays over your stomach, anchoring you to the bed and preventing you from doing anything but take the pleasure he’s giving you. 

You’re trembling and crying at this point, desperate to come, but afraid that if you do, he’ll prolong his so-called lesson into hours and hours of torture like that one time you were accidentally too loud and his roommate had caught on to your relationship. 

Taehyung notices the signs, your eyes screwing shut and your head tipped back in a silent cry, your fingers clenching and unclenching at the head of the bed, and your stomach muscles trembling at the onslaught of his tongue on your clit. He knows that if he flicks his fingers against your spot one time, presses the flat of his tongue against you roughly, you’ll be coming in no time. So he slows down, gives you a little bit of slack as the quick movements of his lips against your core detach and press against your thigh as he catches his own breath, smirking at the way you sigh in relief. 

The fingers inside of you slow down and just run lightly over your trembling pussy, applying enough pressure to keep you on edge, but retreating enough to give you a break. 

“Good job,” He murmurs as your trembles decrease into light shudders and your whimpers fade into rushed pants. Glancing at his watch, he presses a congratulatory kiss onto your engorged clit, ripping a surprised cry from your throat. “Congrats, you held your orgasm for ten minutes.” 

“Now let me show you how it’s really done.” 

He lowers himself and returns to your core with newfound intensity, pressing the flat of his tongue against you and his upper lip sucking against your clit in the process. His fingers enter you again, crooking upwards to find your spot and pressing against it in harmony with the movements of his tongue. 

In seconds, he draws you straight up to the edge again, minutes of endless teasing and edging has you as tight as a wire and your body is screaming for release. And Taehyung rewards just that. 

The heavy hand on your hip drops underneath your bum in a sign of approval for you to move, and your heels immediately dig into his back as you angle your hips up to his mouth in desperation to come. You can literally feel him smile against your core as he chuckles, the vibrations hurtling you straight up to the pinnacle. 

“Come, Y/N,” he grits against you and moves his tongue even faster against you and everything explodes as the orgasm you’d been chasing for the past half hour finally comes, and it doesn’t disappoint. 

Taehyung lets you grind against him as you come, your thighs shaking and your arms numb as they strain against the binds. It washes over you in intense waves, you body trembling as the muscles in your stomach relax, and as your back arches in the sheer pleasure coursing throughout your body. You’re moaning and sighing and you lose control of your volume as the best orgasm in your life is still overwhelming your senses. 

Taehyung moves his tongue against you when he notices you calming down from the orgasm, both hands firmly pressing down into your hipbones and rooting you to the bed as he continues his onslaught on your throbbing core. 

You literally scream, tears springing up at the overstimulation of your senses and your instinct is to cringe away from the overwhelming immediacy of his movements, but the lanky boy is surprisingly strong as he grunts against your squirming hips and anchors you even harder against the sheets. 

The pleasure begins to border on pain and the mixture has you biting your lip so hard it feels like it’s going to bleed and your fingernails pressing into your palms as you ball your fists in a haphazard effort to somehow escape the knots in the neckties. Only when you croak out, “T-too much! Too much! Taehyung, please! Too much!” He breaks away with a smirk, licking his lips with satisfaction and dotting kisses up your belly and up to your breasts with a satisfied groan. 

He kneels up between your legs and watches with growing arousal at the way you still tremble, your arms and legs twitching at the intensity of this lesson, torso dotted with his hickeys and wetness shining in between your thighs. Your dainty little wrists are red at the straining against the binds and he smirks as he thinks about how you were going to hide the marks from Jeongguk whenever you were taking your tests or writing down notes. 

Leaning up, he releases you from the binds, thanking his lucky stars that he, whilst complaining, had retained at least some useful information from the boy scouts on tying good knots. Except that probably wasn’t the whole point of the respected activity, but you know, whatever justifies the means. 

He licks his lips clean, and sucks on his digits as you open your eyes. He watches as your tired lids flutter at the erotic sight of him licking your wetness from his fingers and he takes the time to lick every single one of them clean before walking over to the restroom and grabbing a towel for you. 

He wipes you clean, gently enough to prevent you from cringing away from his touch, and makes sure you’re nice and comfortable before straightening up and moving to sit on the edge of the bed. He covers your body with his thin sheets, as he smirks down at you. “Now thats how you achieve an awesome orgasm. That’s what edging feels like.” 

“I fucking hate you, Taehyung,” you groan, wincing as you struggle to sit up. “That wasn’t only edging.” 

He laughs at your state and reaches over to help you sit up against his pillows. “Oh right, might’ve sprinkled in some overstim in there too, but who knows?” He gives you a cheeky shrug and dodges your kick. 

You glare at him, but it all fades into a laugh as you lean in for a quick kiss, pressing your lips against his as a thank you. You cradle his chin in your hand, stroking the soft skin there and coaxing his jaw to open as you lick at his lips. You tentatively prod your tongue at the seam of his lips, before retreating and nipping at his lower lip and pecking him, exactly how he’d taught you to make out. And Taehyung thinks about how damn good you’ve gotten at kissing compared to the first time you accidentally made him bleed, and despite a swell of pride welling up in his chest, he also feels a teensy bit regretful at teaching you so well, because the way you playfully and softly lick into his mouth has his dick straining against his jeans that he has to literally clench his fist to prevent himself from jumping you right then and there. 

 You take the way he opens his lips for you and lets you explore his mouth as a sign that he wants to continue. Because it was pretty obvious how much he wanted to release given that his pupils were blown out as if he was high and his dick was looking so uncomfortable against his tight jeans you almost felt a little bad for him, despite what he’d just done to you in his bed. 

But he pulls away from you with a tight smile, and grabs your wrist in his large hand as he leans away. You frown at him inquisitively, and he just responds, “You’re probably feeling a little too sore for that right now. You can just sleep for tonight, we can finish the other lessons later.” 

He makes a move to leave, patting himself on the back for being a gentleman for once in his life, but then your soft hand is curling around his bicep and pulling him onto the bed again. You smile up at him with a knowing grin, your skin absolutely gleaming in the post-orgasm bliss and as you sit up he can see that your nipples are hard again. 

“We had a deal, Taehyung. Give and take. You gave me the best orgasm of my life, let me help you with your little problem.” You tip your chin at his crotch, and a strangled unsuccessful attempt at a protest dies on his lips. Reaching down to unbuckle his belt and pressing him down into the sheets, you situate him up against the pillows and grab his hands. 

You lean down to distract him with your lips as you press them on either side of his head, anchoring him down. He protests as you kiss down his neck and pull his shirt off to attack his chest with little nips and hickeys, and you glare up at him, instructing, “Don’t move your hands, Taehyung, or I’ll make sure this is the last blowjob you’ll ever get.” 

He laughs at your attempt to be dominant because he knows at the end of all this, you’d rather have him above you and telling you what to do instead. But he leans back and closes his eyes as you softly smooth your way down his chest and towards his pants and pull them off, settling between his legs and nuzzling into his crotch so softly that a moan escapes his lips. 

“You think you’re the only one who can give? Hm, Taehyung?” You ask softly as your fingers dance over the his dick over the thin material of his boxers, blinking up at him innocently. 

He can’t respond because his head is spinning at the sight of you naked, kneeling between his legs and leaning your cheek on his thigh with a playful glint in your eye. At his silence, you continue. 

“Well, you’ve taught me well, because from now on, you’re gonna also have to learn how to take it from me.” 

And you pull his boxers down and envelop his length into your hot mouth and he lets out a strangled groan as he throws his head back into the pillows. 

Maybe he feels a little bit guilty for enjoying this, because that was definitely not what was supposed to be happening. Maybe he feels a little angry that you’ve gotten really good at this and soon it’ll all be ending and you’ll prance over to Jeon Jeongguk just so the little shit that Taehyung calls a friend will fuck you over just like he did all the other girls he played with. But as you grin around his length and your fingers reach up to intertwine with his in a mock attempt to calm him down, he indulges a little more. 

Because, what was the worst thing that could happen? It was give and take, after all. 

[wordsfailing]

how to say ‘fuck you’ in flowers.

[connor murphy x reader]

a/n: based of this au that i thought was super cute and also super fit for connor :-) sorry if it’s not that good,, im a sucky writer who’s trying their best :’)

word count: 1.9k

The flower shop had been in your family for decades. Some of your earliest took place with your parents carrying you down the aisles of flowers and succulents, telling you strange facts about them and each of their meanings–most of which have engraved themselves into your brain.

As time went on, your parents found other sources of income (since the flower shop just wasn’t enough), which left you to take care of the store by yourself. Not that you minded, of course, to you the shop was the only thing right about this broken world.

You opened today and most days with the intentions of it being a relatively slow day. There wasn’t any holiday coming up and Valentine’s day was a month ago. You figured you might get the odd husband getting flowers for an anniversary or someone getting flowers for a birthday. But for the most part, you knew today was going to be boring.

You stood behind the counter, absentmindedly watering the bouquets with the bright yellow can, staring out the window in the front of your shop watching people stroll by. Your attention was drawn to a brown-haired teenager, a look of irritation written all over his face. Maybe it was the frown etched into his face. Maybe it was how beautiful he was. But you could just about recognise the light eyes paired with the long hair, you just couldn’t put your finger on it.

The last thing you expected was for the man to enter your shop. But he did. The bell above the door rang and he stomped towards the counter, approaching you. He slammed 40 dollars onto the counter, “How do I passively-aggressively say fuck you in flowers?”

You eyebrows shot up in surprise, your mouth trying to form some sort of response but you didn’t expect those words to come out of his mouth. But you had to admit, the expletive that dripped from his mouth couldn’t have sounded sexier.

“I–um. Excuse me?” you asked, slightly confused. The man, who must have realised what just came out of his mouth, sighed. He relaxed his tense shoulders and looked you in the eye.  And you couldn’t help but notice how his blue eyes had a few hints of brown in them. Quite beautiful really.

“Sorry. That-that came out wrong.” the man said with the smallest of laughs. You shook your head.

“No. You’re fine, I just…”  you trailed off, trying to think of the right thing to say. “I just wasn’t sure if I heard you correctly. It isn’t everyday that someone comes in with a request like that.” you replied with a sheepish smile, that was returned but the beautiful boy in front of you. You could practically feel the multiple shades of red and pink creep onto your cheeks.

“Sorry,” he repeated. “It’s a long story–”

“I’ve got time. That is, if you want to talk about it.” you smiled lightly with a shrug. You really weren’t expecting him to take the offer; who would want to share something seemingly pretty personal with someone they hardly knew? But a part of you was secretly hoping he’d confide in you because who wouldn’t want to converse with a beautiful human being?

He pulled up one of the metal barstools and leaned his elbows on the counter, running his hands through his hair. “Well, I just started high school, just a few blocks from here actually–“

You jaw dropped slightly and that’s when you realised who you were talking to. Connor Murphy was sitting just opposite you. Obviously you heard a lot of talk about him through school, most people thought his was a freak but you weren’t so quick to believe that. If you were totally honest you found him quite cute.

“Your Connor Murphy, yeah? I know your sister.”



“Uh, yeah,” he sighed. “And don’t even get me started on my sister. That’s who the flowers are for.”

You nodded understandingly, though there was a twinge of surprise in your face.

“Anyway, I just started high school and it feels like my entire life is falling apart. My parents fucking hate me and their entire lives revolve around my sister, like they couldn’t give less of a shit about me. So I’m being forced to buy a present for Zoe’s birthday.” Connor laments. “I figured a nice passive-aggressive bouquet of flowers would be the perfect present.”

You laughed a bit. “That certainly is an odd request, but I think I can help you!”

“You can help me?” Connor asked, his face lighting up and you nodded.

“Of course! That’s my job.” you stood up, motion of the boy to follow you. He trailed behind you, shadowing you around the aisles of flowers, watching as you picked out a flowers.

“First geraniums which symbolise stupidity,” you say motioning to the orange-red flower. “Then foxglove for insincerity and meadowsweet for uselessness. Yellow carnations say ‘you have disappointed me’ and orange lilies for hatred.”

He watched as you effortlessly tied a white bow around the bundle of flowers and wrapped the stems in plastic.

“You know, if I hadn’t just heard all those meanings, I would’ve thought these flowers meant something beautiful,” Connor said, resting his hand on his head once you were back at the counter. You giggled.

“I mean, the bouquet itself is quite beautiful, though, if you wanted a passive way of telling someone off, this it it!” you said cheerfully arranging the flowers nicely.

“Well thanks for the help, (Y/N),” he said sincerely. You brushed it off, though you blushed at his first use of your name.

“It was no problem. It’s not everyday that I get to make an arrangement that means anything less than ‘I love you’ or ‘happy birthday’ or whatever holiday it happens to be. So the pleasure is all mine.” Connor nodded with a smile. You could see that he was wanting to ask something else, but you didn’t pry.

“That would be $25 dollars.” you said as he slid you the forty dollars he previously slammed on the counter not ever fifteen minutes ago.

You proceeded to make out his change before his voice stopped you. “No, no. You can keep the change.”

You looked up in surprise, wondering why he’d just give away fifteen dollars. “Are you sure? Why would you just give me money?”



“Will that fifteen dollars get you to show me what flower someone would buy to ask someone on a date?” he said with a shy smile not able to look you in the eye any longer.

Your heart sank slightly. There was a small sliver of you was hoping he was wanting to ask you on a date, but the chances of that happening where very minuscule. You knew you shouldn’t feel so down, you hardly knew the guy after all.

“I guess roses would be the way to do that. But I think roses are a little over done. I’d either go for  their favourite flower if you know. Or a pink carnation which means deep love or affection.” you perched your lips to the side, trying to think of something else. “Oh! Or tulips! Those represent declaration of love.” you said making eye contact with Connor, suddenly losing all the words you were going to say. “Those are my favourite for an occasion like that.” you said quietly a light blush covering your cheeks.

You handed him the bouquet of flowers he initially bought, his hands brushing against yours for a long period of time. Not that you were complaining. 


“Thank you for the help, (Y/N).” Connor said with a small smile. You nodded appreciatively as you watched Connor Murphy walk out of her shop, regret filling you to the brim, wishing you’d stopped him.

It had been a couple of days since the encounter with Connor and you couldn’t seem to get the boy out of your head. You knew it was silly. It was just a stupid little crush and you’d get over it in a few days. In school, the two of you never talked and if you happened to walk by each other in the halls the two of you would send friendly smiles to the other. You were secretly wishing he’d come up and talk to you and try to make a move, but you knew not to get your hopes up.

Thankfully, your days at the shop had been pretty busy so your mind was occupied with something other the Connor. Apparently a lot of people really wanted to get married this month for some reason.

But now it was near closing time and you decided to close-up a bit earlier than normal, not really feeling up for staying late. You turned the sign to closed and began watering some of the plants that needed it. You’d only just started when you heard a light knock on the door.

You were prepared to turn around and explain to the person, who clearly didn’t read the sign, that you were closed, but the words caught in your throat when you saw Connor Murphy. You set down the watering can and went to open the door.

“Connor, hi!” you said, not bothering to hide the surprise in your voice. “Surprise visit?” Connor shrugged and you noticed he had one hand behind his back, but you didn’t want to give it to much though, although you felt your anxiety rising.

“The flowers work out okay?” you asked and he nodded.

“They obviously didn’t know the meaning and now they’re actually acknowledging me for doing something good for once; well, my mom is, my dad still hates me. But, whatever, it did the trick.” Connor responded, ending his sentence with a small smile.

“That’s… good. But uh, what are you doing here?” you said not thinking about the words until you saw Connor’s face dim. “Not that I’m not happy to see you!” you follow up quickly.

The boy looked down at his feet momentarily shuffling, then looking back up at you. “I, um,” he started. “You remember how I asked you about flower meanings for asking someone out the other day?”

You nodded slowly. You really hoped Connor wasn’t about to tell you about that flower working out too.

“Yeah?” you said cautiously, wondering where he was going with this. You questions was answered when Connor brought his hand out from behind his back, presenting you with a bouquet of pink, yellow, and purple tulips.

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“I was… sort of hoping that–well…” he struggled with his words. You reached out and hesitantly took the flowers from his hand. You inspected and a small smile appeared on your face.  

“I was hoping you might join me for ice cream or something tonight? I mean–Only if you want to! I know it’s kinda short notice but I really liked talking to you the other day. If you don’t like ice cream–“

You smiled at his rambling before cutting him off. “For your information, I love ice cream. Let me finish closing up here?” you asked.

Connor grinned and nodded.

“Feel free to sit at the counter. I shouldn’t be long.” The two of you shared a smile and your heart fluttered as you set the tulips in a pale blue vase on the counter.

ask / request something !! feedback is super appreciated *wink wonk*

[shinrakirigaya]

Hello this is my bio for gradient some of it is non canon for exple his story belongs to me and all but the baby drawing of gray is mine :3 The baby picher of ink holding gray belongs to @rainbowsixwolf Gradient Drama CQ Nick Name: Gray, Grad Combo of: Ink- @comyet and Error @loverofpiggies Creator: @askcomboclub ---Stats:--- HP:  36 ATK:  17 DEF:  16 ---Biographical informashion--- Species: skeleton Gender: Male Age: 14 Date of birth: March 5th Hight: 4'6" (so smol, but growing slowly) ----Family---- (tenicly cannon if you add logic) Dad: Error Mom: ink Sister: PaperJam Half Brother: Bluescreen Half Brother: Palette Half Brother: Van Half Brother: Splatter Half Brother: Strike ----about me---- (mix of non and cannon) Roommate: Flip Closes Friends: Serif, Karma Loves: Geno, Mafia Crush: Nightmare, Horror, Error Likes:  Digital Art, Scenery Art, Architecture, Pixel Art, Astronomy Dislikes:  Insults, Being Surrounded by a Large Group of Strangers, Vegetable Oil, Dream, Blue, panic and asma attacts Hobbies: Creating, Drawing, Sketching, Traveling through the Multiverse, Star Gazing, Doll Making ---favoret food--- (non cannon) What does he like to eat?:  Gradient, because he has more Error in him than Ink, he can eat normal food but he particularly has a sweet tooth.  Also, at times he will destroy something and devour it’s code.  This method is good for him in case he is really injured and it would take a long time for him to heal.  Though, because he was born in the anti-void, it’s not a necessity for him, its more of luxury. ---Profile--- (cannon) Personality He is shy and wary when you first meet him, due to him being mistaken as error many times. When you get to know him, though, he is snarky, sarcastic and a bit ornery. ---Appearance--- (cannon) Gradient has greyish purple boans, red puples, turquoise "tears", similar to error, and green teat. His fingers are like error's. He wears a black and blue jacket, long brown pants, tiger print shoes and glasses. He has a red jacket tied around his waist, which holds a paper pad and a pen. ---Attakes--- (non cannon) Power's: ShapeShifting, Error blaster's, bone attake. Specialty's: Creating, healing Power's and Glitched shield ----Official description---- (cannon) Gradient is a digital artist who is in a constant cycle of creating and destroying. He can't help but make art but then he feels the art he did is not good enough and destroys it not long after. Spends a lot of time in the combo club art room. Is very shy and wary of strangers but once you get to know him he can be raver snarky and sarcastic. ----My description---- (mine) Hi im gradient and this is my story When i was born error was still the destroyer and ink the creator heck back then fresh was they protector but that's besides the point. I was born as you would expect in the anti void and neither new the outside world or the love of a parent. Error tried to kill me when he found out called me a glitch and as for ink he tried to look after me but everytime he sore error in me he would snap its never safe when they were together so i hid under tables and beds. When i was 7 i almost had a family ink and error came together and tried to raise me but it didn't last. They were yelling and breaking things i tried to stop them but ink struck me for the first time i ran to my room and started crying. I remember a surge of magic run through me as i started to create my first and only portel the floor glitched and polled me though i remember seeing there sad and desperate faces as they tried to teach me but it was too late. I woke up in the bata void and stayed there in that white abyss of 10 years until error found me again. I watched from my screen error and ink create a new family relaxing me with paperjam so i was reluctant at first there was so much i didn't know until i found bluescreen He's my half brother on errors side his dad is blueberry now let me tell you me and blue screen meet them and was fanboying all over the place i mean come on there the originals the most strongest people in the multiverse they like celebrities not to mentchen we ship everything we see and crash god we're nerds though i guess its also has to have something to do with the fact we had near to 0 contact to the outside world are entire lives. Were like twins it's amazing i found him in the files and brought him with me i also have another half brother his name is pallet on inks side his dad is drem pallet is in love with are cusin goth who is the son of death and geno geno and fresh snd are uncles by the way on errors side and we love them but not as much as paperjam loves fresh. Paper Jam is my little bit bluescreens older brother he was born of ink and error he never had to prove himself to them and they traded him like a son on day one so i guess you can say i feel envy for him but i love him and will protect him to my last breath. ---Gradients Lalaby--- (mine) safe and sound we wait in silence with nothing but are ink, with No one there to harm or hurt us, is in silence that we think, though time mean not, ill wait for you to hold you closs agine, for now im free ill keep you safe, and stare at the stares agine... ---Gradients Story--- (mine) Prologue Nothing is what I see. Silence is what I hear. Numbness is what I feel. Trapped in this never ending void of white is where I stay, alone and afraid. And yet, I’ve never been safer. I’m a glitch you see, an ERroR A BeInG ThAt ShOuLdn’T EXIST! Or at least that’s what I’ve been told, heck my own mother thinks I’m a mistake, welts my father tried to kill me more times than I can count. I do not blame them though it is their nature to hate me after all. I guess I have to explain, my father is called Error or the destroyer, and he is the one that goes around destroying AUs or alternate universes and as expected where there is Destruction there is also Creation. That’s where mom comes in, his name is Ink and yes I know but Gray how do to mails have kids, and there is a good answer to that as well, . . . Magic. Anyways ink is the one that creates the au’s in order to keep the balance. They are the opposite of one another, yin and yang, good and evil, wells one destroys another Protects and like everyone in this situation, they hate each other and fight whenever they meet. It was these two that created me. Half Destroyer. Half Creator. I am nothing compared to them, should I chose to protect in the end there’s not much my kind can do… Ten years I’ve been stuck in this empty void with nothing but my ink, dolls and creators pen, I cannot leave nor can I call for help. . . after all I doubt anyone remembers that I ever existed for who could ever love a glitch. The Escape I sit on the floor of the Bata Voids staring into the empty space of white, all knowledge of the outside world has forever been lost two mw, excepted for two things. “My name is Gradient and this doll in my hand is Error, my dad and one day he will find me, but why do I know that?…” I close my eyes as I try to think, a faint memory comes to mine or perhaps just a dream for something this beautiful could never exist is a world of white, a place filled with glittering lights and the face of a man I long to see. It was his voids I remember most, a song he sang to help me sleep once, if I remember correctly I became ill and he never left my side, for some reason I always wanted to know why he bothered if I’m just another glitch to him. But it was in this action that gives me some hope of escaping this hell. After all no matter where I hid or tried to run away, he would always find me. I get up for a split second before collapsing to the floor agile, all feeling in my legs are gone. I stare blankly as the ink that I tipped in my moment of carelessness and watch as the pitch black liquid engulfs the pure white floor. Tears begin to fall down my face as I try everything in my power to stay sane, I close my eyes as I began to sing the very same lullaby that man used to sing all thoughts years ago. “Safe and sound we wait in silent with nothing but are ink. With no one there to harm or hurt us in silence that we think. Though time means not I’ll wait for you to hold you close again. For now I’m free I’ll keep you safe and stare at the stares again…” A memory comes to me as I stare at my glitches hands. My father holding me close as he cry’s into my shoulder, repeating the same words as I glitch into this white abyss. “I don’t know where you’ll be but, I promise, I will find you and when I do will stare at the stares again for all long as you wish, I’m so sorry my so-” I never did get to hear the end of what he was gone say next. I sigh as I pull out my creator’s pen to see the worlds I’ve been dreading for years. “Low battery, exactly the two worlds I didn’t want to see right now.” I close my eyes as a glitches portal opened up in front of me. It was at that moment I know I was finally free. Chapter Three Lost child It was a normal day when I first learned about him, you see my name is Geno or as some might know me as Aftertale sans I am originally from a genocide run so I get kinda triggered from certain comments. Anyways as I was saying it was like any other day, on this day I was visiting my brother error and his wife? Husband…. Ima says wife ya that sounds right so anyways I was visiting my brother at his house in the anti-void. Now you might be wondering, what's the anti-void, well it's like the void but white. Though seriously the anti-void is a big white endless space that error resided alone. Now a daze it's much more noisy. You see in the past error used to be known as the destroyer of the AUs but that was before he met ink, sure they fought a lot and tried to kill each other but know they're inseparable. Ink and error fell in love and like any love story they got married and had a kid named paper jam, I for one like Paperjam he's a cute kid though I find it weird how he has a crush on my brother who is his uncle and what makes it even weirder I think fresh likes him back. Shakes head. that’s off topic though, so as I was saying, I was visiting my brother when I found that photo. I was sitting on the sofa with error when ink asked me to grab an art book from the cupboard for him. So like any kind person I got up and went to the cuboid, but as I was getting the book I knocked over what seemed to be an old photo from. When I picked it up I knotted that the glass what cracked that must have happened in the fall. On closer inspection I knottiest it was a pitcher of error holding what I assume was paperjam. But there was something off about it, unlike paperjam this baby didn't have ink splat he also had box like blue markings on his gray bones unlike paperjam. This got me thinking that this must be someone else kid, so as the cuross and concerned older brother I decided to ask error about it. I closed the door of the cupboard and made my way to the sofa pitcher in hand as I poke errors cheek, Error turns and faces me with little annoyance. “Is there something you need geno?” he asked me in curiosity. “I was wondering if you knew who this baby is considering that you are in the pitcher.?” I handed the photo over to error and sit in wait for any reaction. Error looks at the photo amused by genos curiosity but the more he stares at it, the more his grin starts to fade. He looks at the photo with dread almost like he regretting something. I continue to watch him as he places a hand on the photo over the child face like he's trying to physically touch the child in the image. Curiosity takes over me as I asked him something I know he didn't want to here. “You do know this child right?” My eyes widen as error starts to cry holding the photo close to his chest. I pull him into a comforting hug, rubbing his back to calm him down. “Hay now it's OK, you don't need to tell me if you don't want to” Error shakes his head. “on its not right that you don't know him it's just we've kept this secret for so long…” “You can tell me anything brother, i'm here for you” I place a hand on his shoulder and give him an encouraging look. Error wipes the tears from his eyes as he stares at Geno. “The child in the photo… the reason I know him is that he is mine and inks child.” My eyes widen in disbelief. “you have another child with ink? Why did you never tell us and why did you need to keep it secret” Error looks down in sadness. “The reason we kept it secret is because I killed him…” I jump up in surprise and scream. “YOU DID WHAT TO HIM!!!” Error cried harder as he shakes. “i-it wasn't my fault, h-he just started glitching a-and then the next moment he was gone, I tried to find him believe me I did but ink… he didn't believe me I know he's alive out there I just need to find him I j-just DAMIT” “error pleases calm down this isn't good for you” Error hugs Geno. “Please big brother you have to find him m-maybe he's in the save screen i'll do anything just…. Bring him home” “i'll see what I can do…” Chapter 4 New Biggings ---Genos pov--- I have been searching everywhere and asking everyone i know if they have seen him, tho it was always the same… They iver didn't know who he was or didn't care because he was errors son. Eventually i tried to ask reaper to confirm if he was even alive and to my happiness he said yes, but then he went quiet. I asked him what was wrong and he told me not to go looking for that child because all he will bring is misfortune and death. I was horrified but not at the child but at reaper for trying to stop me from looking for my nefw. We fought and argued for days until he finally gave up and told me where he was but with a condition. If i bring that child back, then reaper and goth will leave. It was an almost impossible chose to make but i chose that child over my own family, so reaper took me to where the child lays. ---Gradients pov--- I flinch as i stare up at geno with broken gray eyes, he makes a move to come close but i scurry away as much as i can before collapsing again from lack of strength. After that he chose not to come closer instead he sat down and stared at me. I eventually build up the courage to speak and as my voice echoed in the white abuse i said. “who are you?” ---Geno pov--- I was shocked to see this child, he looked just like error but more pale and thin, it also looks like he hasn't slept in days. I move closer to pull him into a hug but he ran away almost like i was about to hurt him. I hesitated but sat down to try and make myself look smol and less threatening. It must of worked because moments later he spoke* “who are you?” “my name is geno, i'm your uncle” “u-uncle g-geno?” “yh that's right, you're safe now i'm gonna take you home.” I smile at the child in a comforting way as his eyes fill with hope and tears, then out of nowhere he hugs me in a accepting way and it was in that moment i know. I finally saved someone. ---Other Discripchion--- (not mine) Gradient is a teenager (14) and he tries to act older than he is(evident of his speech) but he HATES acting his age because he doesn’t wanna be seen as childish. He also has the unique ability that whenever he becomes extremely flustered/embarrassed, his form will start to bubble (much like a lava lamp) as his form starts to change from a solid to a liquid.When Gradient travels through the multiverse, like his father (Ink), he keeps an AU log.  He likes to learn about the different AUs before his dad (Error) destroys them. When Gradient is with strangers, most often he might slip and act his age.  However, when he’s with his friends or people that knows him, he will do his best to not act his age. Gradient doesn’t need to sleep (because he was born in the anti-void) but on certain occasions he will.  Otherwise he rarely sleeps. When he does sleep he most of the time has nightmares  Gradient has Haphephobia, like Error, he has a fear of touch.  So strangers he ESPECIALLY hates touching him and even if you’re already one of his friends, he still doesn’t like to be touched but he will tolerate it. If Gradient were to receive a gift (and he has so we’ll use the MP3 Player for an example) he would selfish and NOT want to share.  He would fear that it would be taken away and he would never get it back.  (Kinda linking this to how Error was never around when he was a kid and he doesn’t want something precious, gift or parent, to slip through his fingers again. Plus he’s a teenager so its kinda natural for them to act selfishly here and there. Gradient has heard of AUs and timelines that have made it to the surface, but he has never encountered one before. He also is very naive.  He’s not familiar at all with human things or the world above. (Ex: His friend Rip offered him cake once, and he didn’t know what cake was.  He was asked if he owned a radio since he likes music but he didn’t know what a radio was) Gradient is also a pacifist.  He does not like to fight.  However, if the situation absolutely demands it, and if he is pushed over the edge just enough, he won’t hesitate to protect what he cares about. Even to this day, Gradient longs for Error to accept him as his son.  He doesn’t hate him and he won’t ever be able to since that is his dad. Gradient doesn’t believe that someone can come to love him because he sees that he has so many problems that he doesn’t seem himself as a desirable catch.  (His glitching, his eating habits, how he destroys his creations so willy nilly, etc) Gradient also has a fear of touching things that are nice or pretty because he feels that anything he touches could destroy at the slightest touch of his fingers.   Gradient gets jealous of other people’s artwork and it may come to the point where he wishes to destroy their work. Gradient, despite being the eldest, still has a lot to learn about the world. He lived in the Anti-Void his whole life, so he knows nothing about Earth or any human or monster customs. He's very curious and not afraid to say what's on his mind at any given time: he loves to learn about the different AU's before Error destroys them, and keeps an AU log. He also has the unique ability that whenever he becomes extremely flustered/embarrassed, his body will start to bubble (much like a lava lamp) as his form starts to change from a solid to a liquid. Gradient loves to create, but is a perfectionist, dubbing his creations 'hideous' before promptly destroying them. ---Relashion ships--- Paperjam Paperjam is in the middle in terms of age, but definitely acts the most responsible. Gradient admires PJ's resolve and confidence in himself despite the odds being stacked against him. He tries to help PJ take care of Bluescreen and offer his support in times of need. They're very closely knit: Paperjam considers himself the protector of his brothers. Gradient is thankful to have PJ there. Bluescreen Bluescreen is the youngest of the three. Gradient likes to challenge him to contests and games to try and boost his confidence. He doesn't like seeing Blue lonely, as Gradi himself knows the feeling all too well. So he spends as much time as he can with Bluescreen, often asking him to help out with a project. Oftentimes their escapades get out of control, which ends in getting in trouble with Paperjam. Ink When Gradient was born, Error immediately rejected him, whereas Ink took him in. When nothing is too busy, Gradi likes to visit Ink in whatever part of the universe he happens to be in. They know all each others' ins and outs: they're very similar in personality. Ink likes to spend most of his free time with Gray, while Error fawns over Paperjam. Gray tries to include Bluescreen in as much as he can, which Ink deeply appreciates. Error Error hates Gradient with a burning passion, avoiding him as much as possible, and at one point even attacking him for visiting without permission. Gradi, on the other hand, wants Error's love and acceptance more than anything. He tries fruitlessly to prove himself. He wishes Error would love him, and is angered by the fact that he won't accept him. But despite that, Gradient still loves his dad, even if Error will always loathe him.

[imabookmarkaddict]

trevor is cheesy, markus’ thoughts on hanging and banging

Poor trevor trying to understand anything markus says

puzzlezToday at 3:45 AM

yeh i already have an idea for how markus explains it

[

3:46 AM

]

i was thinking the series could be something like idfk

WelshenToday at 3:46 AM

Yeah okay good i just didnt wanna put u in a place of trying to describe something supernatural

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3:47 AM

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Markus is good at recognizing patterns too so series of numbers r p easy to notice

puzzlezToday at 3:47 AM

13 7 21 18 12 1 23 17 6 3 22

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3:47 AM

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where it's 3 series of numbers that alternate or smth

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3:47 AM

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they all go up by 5

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3:48 AM

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13 to 18 to 23, 7 to 12 to 17, 21 to 1 to 6

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3:48 AM

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if u can even see it god nowi'm like markus

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3:48 AM

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but he has no idea how to explain it to trevor

WelshenToday at 3:48 AM

Oh god yeah exact

puzzlezToday at 3:48 AM

so he just writes it down and shows it to trevor like see u see the pattern

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3:48 AM

]

and trevor is just staring at a string of random numbers

WelshenToday at 3:48 AM

Its like trevor explaining morning runs to markus

puzzlezToday at 3:48 AM

...tf drugs u on

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3:48 AM

]

and markus just keeps writing numbers

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3:49 AM

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like do u see the pattern?

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3:49 AM

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here i'll do another one give me a number

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3:49 AM

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and trevor does and markus writes and then says now you do th next one

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3:49 AM

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and trevor blinks down at the numbers

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3:49 AM

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maybe it can get cute

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3:49 AM

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trevor has no idea what markus is doing and decides time to change subject cuz numbers, lol

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3:50 AM

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and maybe the last number in the series markus wrote was a 3

WelshenToday at 3:50 AM

Probably? Time for sex education

puzzlezToday at 3:50 AM

and trevor just adds a < to it

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3:50 AM

]

yeh i see the pattern

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3:50 AM

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"<3"

WelshenToday at 3:50 AM

Oh thats cheesy christ

puzzlezToday at 3:50 AM

u asked for it

WelshenToday at 3:50 AM

But markus doesnt use phones he has no clue

puzzlezToday at 3:50 AM

hey maybe markus can call him out on it

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3:50 AM

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oh fuck then it's perfect

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3:50 AM

]

maybe trevor is bad at flirting with guys sometimes??

WelshenToday at 3:51 AM

Im sure he has never tried in his life

puzzlezToday at 3:51 AM

like maybe he tried cheesy stuff with girls and it worked so whenever he feels lost and confused he just defaults to a cheesey cute one liner

WelshenToday at 3:51 AM

Just dates idk cheerleaders and other sporty girls

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3:51 AM

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Omh yah perf

puzzlezToday at 3:51 AM

how would markus react tho

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3:52 AM

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would he enjoy it mostly like watching an amusing 5 yo play at dressup

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3:52 AM

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or would he just cringe like wtf drugs r U on

WelshenToday at 3:53 AM

He would just be confused until he understands and then embarrassed to heck

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3:53 AM

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Markus doesnt flirt much either u kno

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3:54 AM

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Its just heres money lets go

puzzlezToday at 3:54 AM

poor thing

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3:54 AM

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if i remember correctly, will was a smooth talker flirter

WelshenToday at 3:54 AM

Squint

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3:54 AM

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If u mean when he said ur beautiful after like 2mins is smooth

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3:54 AM

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Yeah

puzzlezToday at 3:55 AM

so yeah maybe trevor can be bad as heck at flirting until he feels awkward and spits out those one-liner balls of cheese in a rush of panic

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3:55 AM

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well i'm p sure will thought he was a smooth talker

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3:55 AM

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ppl probs too polite to point out he ain't

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3:55 AM

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but yeh thought it might give markus some variation?

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3:56 AM

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unless u prefer trevor to be good at flirting

WelshenToday at 3:57 AM

No trevor can be bad but markus is equally bad

puzzlezToday at 3:57 AM

perrrrrrrfect

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3:57 AM

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i picture trevor kinda secretly watching markus for cues sometimes on what to do??

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3:57 AM

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i mean porn shows u terrible, fake, unrealistic sex

WelshenToday at 3:57 AM

And markus is normally not very perceptive

puzzlezToday at 3:57 AM

at best u learn how to bend your hips back forward in impossible yoga/sex moves

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3:58 AM

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and since he tried those and learned nothing trevor knows nada about actual relationships with dudes

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3:58 AM

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so i had a feeling he was going to sort of quietly watch markus for leads on what to do

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3:58 AM

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so markus being bad at teaching + panicked trevor + cheesy pickup line + markus confused + markus not able to flirt back = a terrible awkward but adorable couple of doofuses

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3:58 AM

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and this i can absolutely work with

WelshenToday at 3:59 AM

Markus can do it technically but not very enthusiastically?? If that makes sense

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3:59 AM

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He gets better but u kno

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3:59 AM

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Yes i hope that works

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3:59 AM

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Theyre both idiots

puzzlezToday at 3:59 AM

i think that makes sense

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4:00 AM

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maybe squint

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4:00 AM

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do you mean he like technically knows how/can think of something flirty to say but has no oomph behind it? like no drive to actually look/sound flirty?? or smth else?

WelshenToday at 4:02 AM

Yes pretty much

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4:03 AM

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I mean hes heard it all obv but that was more or less when he got paid so it sounds fake to him i guess(edited)

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4:04 AM

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So he can repeat it but i doubt he knows how to mean it? Or that he could stick to things he ACTUALLY means (but hed be too awk to say)

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4:04 AM

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And that goes for all relationship hijinks

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4:05 AM

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Jo was a weird mix of paid and cute stalker?? They didnt flirt so much as get along

puzzlezToday at 4:06 AM

yeahh okay

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4:06 AM

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it makes sense tho

WelshenToday at 4:07 AM

Hey hes a mess

puzzlezToday at 4:07 AM

i made a char who was a prostitute and if deffo made him bad at relationships for similar reasons

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4:07 AM

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(my ghost waja actually)

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4:07 AM

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(prostitute ghost waja)

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4:07 AM

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(v wajas appropriate)

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4:07 AM

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so then does markus actually uhh like idk enjoy sex?

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4:08 AM

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if he's done all kinds of stuff from vanilla to crazy-whatever-clients want stuff i'm assuming he's tried/seen most if not all flavors of sex?

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4:08 AM

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so would it be 100% a chore to get through sex or would he still enjoy it in relationships?

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4:09 AM

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i wasn't sure how to write the sorta kinda sex scene with trevor for this reason squint

WelshenToday at 4:10 AM

Im pretty sure hes asexual but not aromantic, he definitely thinks its a chore but if its with someone he has a romantic interest in its a fun chore?(edited)

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4:10 AM

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And at this stage its the only way he knows how to connect with people well guys anyway

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4:12 AM

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Adam fits him better cuz hes got low interest in sex and markus prefers making out and cuddling?

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4:12 AM

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Thats like 10years later when markus has gotten some idea of what he prefers tho

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4:12 AM

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Does that even make sense

puzzlezToday at 4:13 AM

yeah

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4:13 AM

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like i said my one oc was a prostitute and he's of a similar uh... mind? i guess is the word?

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4:13 AM

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in that regard

WelshenToday at 4:13 AM

Yeah

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4:14 AM

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Im sure theres plenty of types of people, but these ones just do it as any other job?

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4:14 AM

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I think markus referred to it as not much difference to idk toilet janitor, he even prefers this cuz he can lay down and nap lol

puzzlezToday at 4:15 AM

omfgggg

WelshenToday at 4:16 AM

Probably napped while working to be honest

puzzlezToday at 4:16 AM

yeh my char did it purely for money and he's impatient af but decent at acting so an extent to he pretended to enjoy company of his clients for the money but secretly hated most of them and the kinkier ones ruined sex for him in a way? like it's just "pretend and act out these ridiculous things" so he doesn't really enjoy sex, figures it's a chore, just gotta see it through to the end, and that mindset continues with him for a while(edited)

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4:16 AM

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but i can see markus napping

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4:17 AM

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lazy bones boy

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4:17 AM

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so i'm guessing markus wouldn't really initiate sex then

WelshenToday at 4:18 AM

He would if trevor made him uncomfortable enough

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4:18 AM

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Cuz at lesst he knows how to do THAT

puzzlezToday at 4:19 AM

yeah okay that makes sense

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4:19 AM

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poor kid tho rofl

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4:20 AM

]

so i'm assuming trevor is bad as gay sex in general because never tried before but

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4:20 AM

]

would he be the type to be eager to learn, like want to please markus in bed, or would he be a more impatient/selfish lover, like i wanna race to the end and if we figure out how to please you along the way, then good perf

WelshenToday at 4:22 AM

Probably the first

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4:22 AM

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If it was the second one markus would start to feel cheated out of money

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4:23 AM

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Well i mean its not easy to do but by that i mean even if trevor is done theyd still make out enough for markus to get over it

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4:23 AM

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Squint

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4:23 AM

]

This is very difficult

puzzlezToday at 4:24 AM

omg snort

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4:24 AM

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i think i get what you mean tho

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4:24 AM

]

markus gets "paid" in uh... affection/devotion?idk if that's the right word but

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4:24 AM

]

trevor focusing on some kind of need of markus would be like "payment" in a convoluted sense for the sex?(edited)

WelshenToday at 4:25 AM

Yes

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4:25 AM

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Pretty much exactly

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4:26 AM

]

Well markus hasnt had a currency free relationship yet

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4:27 AM

]

Thinks every bit of affection is to be paid or payment for smth

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4:27 AM

]

This is babys first real bf tbh(edited)

puzzlezToday at 4:29 AM

trevor?

WelshenToday at 4:30 AM

Markus

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4:30 AM

]

Well trevors too

puzzlezToday at 4:30 AM

okay yeh i thought you meant markus/trevor

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4:30 AM

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making sure

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4:30 AM

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first real bfs with each other

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4:31 AM

]

sad the relationship goes up in such flames

WelshenToday at 4:31 AM

Yes well

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4:31 AM

]

It was really neithers fault

puzzlezToday at 4:32 AM

and yet the flames buuuurn

WelshenToday at 4:32 AM

But markus is the one on his own after

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4:32 AM

]

Unless u count spencer

puzzlezToday at 4:32 AM

do u count spencer

WelshenToday at 4:32 AM

As a minus i do

[shinrakirigaya]

[swan1974-blog]

Swan and falcon

Swan Smiled When He Felt Her Arms Wrapping Around Him, The Warmth Of Her Hold Somehow Drawing Him In And Making Him Feel An Extreme Abundance Of Emotion. His Gaze Returned To Falcon Who Lay Wrapped Securely In His Arms. He Never Would Have Imagined That She Would So Willingly Trust Him Enough To Rest There, But A Slight Smile Covered His Face As He Maintained His Gentle Hold On Her. Perhaps If Anything, This Was The Silver Lining To This Whole Sordid Mess. As Her Sobs Subsided, She Began To Back Away From Him, Her Head Rising Until Her Eyes Met His. Falcon Says,I Feel So Bad. All Of This After I Said So Many Cruel Things About Him, I Still Love Him. I Was Treating Him Like He Was Still The Same Man He Was After Sam's Death, Apathetic And Mean. He Is A Different Man Than Before. Swan Sings A Verse From Lonely Hearts By Paul Williams, My Time Is Your Time The Song Begins The Move Starts The Sweet Life The Lovers And What About The Lonely Hearts? Lonely Hearts Tired Eyes Seldom Wins, Always Tries When You Don't Belong Always Say Things Wrong When You've Looked So Long And Wound Up Lost Again Falcon Shook Her Head With A Smile, As Guilty Tears Began To Stream From Beneath Her Eyes. Falcon Says About The Song,Why Are You Singling That Song? She Said Shyly All The While Noticing How His Vest Was Covered With The Moisture From Her Tears. Swan Explained Why He Sang Lonely Hearts, I Remembered Searching For True Love. I Didn't Find It In Sonya, But Elsewhere. You Haven't Found True Love, Have You? She Nodded And Says,I Don't Feel I Have, But I May Have In You. Falcon Began To Talk About Paul Williams. Falcon Teased,Was It You Singing, Swan? You Were Singing It Right,Not Paul? I Know You're Not Paul, But I Swear I Exactly Heard Paul's Singing Voice When You Sang. I Love It. Falcon Knew That Swan Hates Being Called Paul Williams, Swan Living In Paul's Famous Songwriter Shadow With Little Jealousy Over Paul's Songwriter/Singing Career And Fame. Swan Says,I'm Fine With You Complimenting Me. Just Stop Comparing To Paul, I Know We're Twins, But I Know I Just Sing And Sound Like Him, And I May Even Sound A Little Like A Girl. Falcon Says,You're Voice Is Cute And Adorable. Your High, Thin Little Voice Singing Voice Is Like Listening To Young Paul In His 1970'S Titled Albums And Songs. Your Singing Brings Back Memories. The Voice Was Different Back Then, But The Heart’s The Same. And The Songs Will Always Be About Love. And Oh, The Albums Feature A Wealth Of Lesser-Known Gems That Boast The Same Open-Hearted Intimacy And Straightforward Melodic Appeal Of His Hits. He Is The Best Artist. Swan Says About One More Angel Song,One More Angel Makes Me Think Of Sam Every Time. Does The Song Remind You Of Her, Too? Falcon Says,Yes, And Willy, Replacing The Feminine Pronouns With Masculine Pronouns, Of Course. Always The Instrumental Breaks Are Lovely, And The Lyrics Are Heartbreaking-He's Always So Emotional With His Music, Which I Love. He's Not One Bit Boring. He Sounded Great, The Emotions In His Voice Matching The Mood Of The Song And Lyrics. Why Do I Think That In A Sad Song He Sounded Sad And In A Love Song He Sounded Loving. Swan Says,I Agree. Falcon Says,Doesn't His Songs Help You Go Through Things In Your Life Like It Does Mine? Swan Says,Yes. I Was Always Dealing With Deafness And Blindness And Having To Lip Read Ever Since I Was Born. How I Dealt With It Was I Got Glasses And Hearing Aids. I Often Rely On Other Sensory Clues To Figure Out With Whom Im Are Interacting. Look At My Hearing Aids. Swan Pulls His Hair Back To Let Falcon See His 2 Hearing Aids Molds On Both Ears Which Were Red And Black Swirls With The Battery Door Is Red And Tubing Is Black. Falcon Says,I Like Them. I Remember And Seen How You Wanted To Hide Them So People Won't Question You. Do You Still Remember To Take Them Off When You Went To Bed And Put Them On Every Day. I Don't Really Want To Remind You Because I Don't Want To Seem Pushy Or Bossy. Swan Says,It's Okay, You're Not Pushy Or Bossy. I Was Always Hiding My Hearing Aids In Both Ears In My Long Hair To Look Normal. Lip Reading Can Only Help Me Understand So Much What Someone Is Saying. How Would You Help Me With My Difficulties With Lip Reading, If You Can? Not Minding That I Ask For You To Repeat What You Said If I Always Don't Get It. Is That Okay? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,You May Already Know I Am Extremely Introverted. I Don't Really Understand The Situation When I Get Out Of Public And Being More Vulnerable Position Using My Disabitity Because It Is Harder For Me To Understand What Is Going On Around Me. I Always Hating The Loud Sounds And Noises And The Like Because Too Much Noise Leads To Confusion. I Hate Being Discriminated Of My Disabitity Because It Is Not Right. I Am Human, Too. Me Taken Advantage Of Because Of My Deaf And Blind Disability By My Non Disabled Partners Like Soyna For Example. She Thought I Was Too Dumb To Make My Own Intellectual Decisions. I'm Defidently Be More Vulnerable, Possibly Not Sure Where The Next Attack Is Coming From Sonya When She Abused Me And Sam. Oh Gosh, That Woman Was Unpredictable! Sam Even Used Sign And Let Me Lip Read Her To Help Me Describe What's Happening To Me And Her, And Most Importantly Why. Falcon Says,How Would You Support People Who Are Also Deaf Blind? Swan Says,Good Question. I Would Pressure The Nick Network To Have A Deaf And Blind Character In Icarly Because It Is Hard To Find A Character Like That. I'm A Deaf And Blind Activist By The Way. What Do You Think? Falcon Says,Deaf Blind Individuals Can Watch And Relate To The Character. Swan Says,That's Right. I Didn't Have My Hearing Aids On In The Morning When I Sleep, Because I Can't Sleep With Them On. They Make A High Pitched Squealing Sound When I Lay My Head On The Pillow. How Would You Wake Me Up If I Couldn't Hear You. What Would You Do? Falcon Says,Shake You Awake? Swan Says,Yes, Gently, Of Course. Falcon Says,How About Throwing A Bucket Of Cold Water On You? Swan Says,Brrrr, Don't Be Surprised If I Dump A Bucket Of Cold Water On You Later! Falcon Says,Okay, Onto A More Serious Note. How Would You Let Me Know To Speak Louder If The Cyclia Kaleidoscope Room Is Too Loud For You To Hear Me? Can You Turn The Music Off? You Having A Hard Time Listening To Me While Hearing Loud Music. I Know You Try To Listen To Understand. Trying Hard To Read My Lips. Reading Lips Is 90% Affective. Swan Explained,I Can Read Lips Really Well, Actually, And You Can Talk Loudly In My Ear. Falcon Says,Okay, Gotcha! Swan Says While Hearing His Right Hearing Aid Died Off Not Able To Hear Falcon, Thanks A Lot, My Hearing Aid Battery Is Making A Strange Noise. Knowing That She Heard Swan's Hearing Feedback Died Off, Falcon Signs Him What Is It Swan Can You Hear Me? Swan Was Offended And Politely Explained,My Hearing Aid Battery Died. I'm Verbal And Never Learned To Sign Because I Never Felt The Need For It. I Can Read Your Lips, Not Sign Language. I Should Ask You To Be Louder And Clear If I Would Hear You While Lip Reading. Will You Do That, Please? Falcon Says,Yes. Swan Says,Thank You. Falcon Goes In Her Purse To Give Swan His Package Of Hearing Aid Batteries. Swan Says While Putting The Battery In His Hearing Aid,Thanks For Keeping Spare Batteries For Me. He Puts It Back On His Ear. Falcon Says,Can You Hear Me Now? Swan Says,Yes. I Still Need You To Get Me And Make Large Print Copies Of Screenplays I Get From The Mail About Icarly. It Really Helps Me To Read And Not Strain My Eyes. A Closed Captioned Phone Because I Can See The Words That Are Being Said In The Screen, In Case I Don't Understand What's Being Said, Causing Less Frustration For Me, And Less Frustration To The Person I'm Talking To. To Suit My Disability Needs What Do You Think? Falcon Said,Sounds Good To Me Whatever Helps. What About Closed Captioning On Icarly And Zoey 101? Just For You Because The Same Reason You Use Close Captioned Phones. I Always Do That For You If You Stop Pestering Me About Where They Are At! Don't You Know You Pester Me? Swan Says,No Idea. Falcon Says,Just Kidding. You Can't Even Hear Everything I Say Coming Out Of My Mouth. It Is Really Important For You To Maintain Eye Contact. It Sometimes Really Frustrates Me If You Say I Can Hear You When You're Not Hearing Me Correctly. Would You Do That? Swan Groaned And Says,I Don't Have To Look At You To Hear You. Falcon Says,Yes You Do! Don't Get Stubborn With Me! Swan, I Have Been Too Kind To You. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,It's Like You Don't Want To Listen To Me. Just Give Me The Hearing Aid Clip On Microphone So You Can Hear Me Better, Or Else I Won't Talk To You. Lip Reading Doesn't Always Help You Even You Miss What I'm Saying. You Hear Me? Swan Protested,No. Falcon Says,Swan, Please. I'm Not Asking You To Stand On Your Head And Spin Around Singing The Abc's. I Even Notice You Always Stare Off In Space When I Try To Talk To You, You're Not Fooling Me. It Means You Can't Really Hear Me Because You Won't Look In My Direction. Swan Says,I Can Hear You. Falcon Says,I Can't Tell! Swan Says,Well, Trust Me I Can. Falcon Says,You Need To Respond Correctly. Swan Sighed And Gives Her The Clip On Microphone From His Pocket, Falcon Puts It In Her Pocket And Clips It On Her Shirt Near Her Mouth. Falcon Says,Thank You, Swan. Do You Hear Me Now? Tell Me. Swan Lied,No. Falcon Was Frustrated And Says,You Can't Even Respond No If You Couldn't Hear Me. Do You Have Your Mic Setting On Your Hearing Aids On? Do You? Do You? Do You? Swan Grumbled And Says,Stop Pestering Me. Falcon Says,I Wouldn't Pester Me If You'd Stop Being Stubborn. If You Don't Understand Or Get Something I Say, Let Me Know. Don't Be Afraid To Say Can You Repeat It Or Make It Simple So I Can Understand You Well. Do You Comprehend? Swan Says,Yes? Falcon Says,Thank You. Swan Says,I Don't Like This Thing. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Puts On The Mic Setting On His Hearing Aids And Hears Falcon Better. Falcon Says,Why? Swan Says,It Looks Funny. Falcon Says,I Had A Friend Who Used One In School, People Just Assumed She Was Allowed To Listen To Her Ipod In School. She Had To Explain It Wasn't An Ipod. Swan Says,Oh, Cool, Good To Know. I Assume People Think That I'm Mentally Handicapped Or Retarded Because I Can't Hear Well. Falcon Says,That Is Nonsense. Swan Says,I Know. Falcon Says,Then Stop Thinking That!