#I hope this helped lol I’m so bad at explaining myself-

[froggo-tea]

I love how adorably you draw Xero. For me it is difficult to draw him so expressively, so how do you do it?

Waaaa thank u so much!!! Truly one of the best compliments I could ever receive :)

To be completely honest, I’ve been drawing Xero for like 2 years now or like a year and a half. Practicing has made me understand how I want to portray his character and the personality he has (or that I’ve given to him) in a way I don’t really acknowledge it, like, my hands know how to but my mind doesn’t- if that makes any sense lol

I still struggle to draw him from time to time, sometimes I feel like I do the same doodle lol. I guess exaggerating face features and moving them around is my way of doing it. Like I move his eyes a lot, every doodle of him has different eyes. I also add that little “brow” line on top to indicate the feeling better (just that one line can change the way he looks! which is impressive and a ur scary-) Playing around with poses too, even if you are just doing from the chest up twisting the body around helps, not just making him stiff in a straight line, certain poses can reflect someone’s personality! Like the way you stand is different from the way others stand (some out all their weight into just one leg, some have their hands crossed, etc etc) and that can show the way you act.

Sometimes I draw a little fang to show mischief for example! When his eyes are straight it means tiredness but when they are more tilted they look more angry, another example!

Im not a big expert on art and it’s hard for me to explain stuff to others but I hope this helps! We all start drawing something in a way you might not like, but slowly you get good at it! dw you’ll find your way!!

Ngl this made me look through my old doodles, so here’s how much I’ve grown to draw Xero!

These 2 doodle were done in November of 2022. The way I’ve drawn him has changed a lot actually- I hadn’t drawn him that much so these do feel a bit awkward- I hadn’t placed my art style on him yet, I was just using the in-game design.

Here are three others that I had done around 2023. I was getting more used to drawing him, tho I was still improving at drawing! The emotion I give him is expressed through his eyes cause he doesn’t really have a mouth lol- different shapes of eyes can help change what he’s feeling for me so yee.

And these are the last doodles I’ve done for him, literally drew these yesterday. I feel so comfortable drawing him now cause he’s just so funky and silky. His helmet is so hard to get use to drawing tho, I still find it a bit hard to draw his side view but hey I’m trying! (Also I tried redrawing the doodle of Xero on a throne-)

Tbh I’m really happy that you think he looks expressive!!! I always tell myself I gotta add more emotion to him and not letting him have an emotionless face, so I’ve been forcing myself to add more and more feeling slowly lol.

I don’t really know the exact way of adding more expression tho, kinda just guessing why it may look like that. Sometimes, I just do it. So, keep practicing! It’s what every artist tells other artists but it’s true, sadly lmfao.

Thank u again!! As the self-proclaimed #1 Xero hk fan (which lol probably I’m not but I love him to much so I like to think it as that-) I am thankful that you’ve acknowledged my incredible skills at drawing this silly fool.

[silksongeveryday]

Drawing Hornet everyday until Silksong comes out - Day 400!!!

Well then.

Thanks to everyone for all the love and support, genuinely one of the biggest reasons I still continue doing this daily. You all are amazing :)

And thank you for 2.3k!!!

…I don’t really know what else to say at this point lol???? I’ve been doing this so long these milestones are starting to become less and less exciting. /lh

I’ll be honest I was really banking on Silksong being released in 2023 I genuinely wasn’t expecting to make it more than 250 days tbh. But hey, I guess I was joining the delusional crowd with that one lol. I just really hope Silksong releases this year or at least we get a confirmed release date at all???? All this waiting is starting to feel like kingdom hearts 3 all over again

Well anyway, here’s my 100 day checkup I guess:

Burnout has been wavering in and out I think. I’m not putting in effort like I used to during the day 150-250 period of this blog but hey the fact that I’m still dedicating a brain cell to this at all is impressive to me. Generally speaking I’m not a person who likes to commit themselves to something for more than a year unless I absolutely have to. I could literally take a break from this blog whenever I want but it’s been such a consistent part of my daily routine that I just haven’t lol.

I’ve been debating back and forth with myself on whether or not I want to have a couple people helping out with the blog. On one hand it would be really nice to have a helping hand so I could take more consistent breaks but on the other hand I’ve never been good at communication especially because organizing something like that is wayyyy out of my comfort zone. I run my blog a very specific way and I’m often bad at explaining my process to others without something getting misunderstood.

So I’m thinking up a few other ideas as well. Don’t feel like going into specifics because I’m not certain on them at all but if I feel like one works I’ll talk about it more in the future here or on my main blog.

Life has been really busy lately but after a long time I think I might finally have time to dedicate a full day to drawing multiple doodles so I can mass schedule and take a longer break I think. No promises on that but here’s to hoping.

Oh yeah also today’s specific drawing is inspired by Day 174. Also considered a redraw I guess??

That’s all I can think to say right now, so I guess that’s everything, thanks for reading! Here’s to more doodles! :)

[hugmekenobi]

Forever

A Bad Batch Post S3 Oneshot

Gif by @barissoffee

Hunter x femaleJedi!reader

Summary: Just when you think your fresh start can officially begin, the past still finds a way to haunt you

Warnings: No (Y/N), me adding one actual personal characteristic (sorry if you aren't arachnophobic), reader has hair long enough to hold, light PDA (kissing), mentions of scars, SMUT (shower sex with non-explicit descriptions of oral m&f receiving, handjob, fingering, making out, dirty talk,hints of praise kink), suggestive dialogue, reader wears a sundress, swearing, hints of Tech/Phee, just stick with me on the Lyra explanation please, mentions of food and drinks/alcohol, drink and general tampering for the sake of poisoning, me making up medical things, descriptions of illness (vomiting, fever, bodily pain), mentions of medical testing/needles and injections, concerned bad batch family, brief dark/protective Hunter, injury (cuts, blaster shots, broken nose/nosebleeds) and torture descriptions with further mentions of pain and blood, a certain lizard makes an unwelcomed appearance, big on the overall fluff and loving vibes but also big on angst and hurt/comfort, references to death and torture, near-character death, fluff and happy ending don't worry

<Previous Oneshot (not totally necessary to read but helpful for build up)

Masterlist for S1,S2 and S3

Word Count: 24.9K (don't look at me lol)

Rating: 18+

Author's note: This is a crazy ride jam-packed with fav tropes of mine, so I can only apologise for the emotional whiplash, but blame my dream because that is where this entire concept came from! Hope it was worth the wait!

The day of the party everyone had been eager awaiting had finally arrived. It was being done in your and the rest of the Batch’s honour and was serving as a combined official welcome to Pabu/congratulations on making it through everything alive type of thing but regardless of the slightly elaborate purpose, the island was all a buzz with excitement and preparations.

You and Hunter were meandering away from the busy colonnade. Your offer to help with the last of the party set up had been politely declined so instead the two of you had opted to join the others at the beach.

“Hey!”

You turned in surprise at the familiar voice and you saw the woman running off her ship and towards you. “Oh hey! What-” Your question was cut off with a huff of air as you were brought into a tight hug.

“Let me see-” Lyra stepped back from you and grabbed your hands excitedly but stopped short as she held them.

“See what?” You looked at her, utterly perplexed by her behaviour.

Hunter resisted the urge to clamp his hand over Lyra’s mouth but there’d be no believable way to explain that away, so he just had to stand there and cross his fingers that you didn’t pressure Lyra for further elaboration.

Lyra realised her mistake and backtracked quickly. “You. Let me see you. It’s been far too long.” She dropped your hands and just walked around you, analysing your form. “Yup, I still got it. Both of you are looking pretty sharp in my stuff if I do say so myself. So, I bet the rest of your lot do to.”

“Stop that.” You twisted your head around and waved her away with a fond yet bemused grin. “Why are you acting so weird? Better yet why are you here? Not that I’m not happy to see you.” You added hastily but you were a second too late.  

Lyra placed her hand over her heart in faux offence. “Wow, months with no word and then only sporadic comm channel conversations and this is how I’m greeted? I told you I would visit. Speaking of, I brought more samples of my work.” She gestured to the two cases by her feet. “Top one is yours, the second is to be divided between the rest of your crew. But to answer your question, I’m here for the party.”

You titled your head at her. Your last call had been before the party had been decided so you didn’t know how she knew about it. “The party? Who invited you?” You asked quizzically.

Lyra shot a nervous glance to the man at your side. She’d already almost blown it; she didn’t want to risk doing it again. “Uh, Hunter did actually.”

You glanced at Hunter curiously. “You did?”

Hunter maintained a sense of calm as he answered, “Well, technically it was through Echo, but I put them in contact. Also, a lot of people were asking about our clothes. Figured it couldn’t hurt to see if Shep needed someone like her here. Today felt like the perfect time.” That part was a genuine truth. He hadn’t thought much of the situation on Christophsis in the short time he’d been there- well, what he had thought wasn’t in any way positive-, and you’d always expressed interest in figuring out a way to get Lyra out of there and somewhere better. He was killing two birds with one stone here.  

“Yeah, a party and a job opportunity away from Imperial bullshit was too good to pass up.” Lyra confirmed with a grin.

You smiled broadly. “Oh okay! That’d be pretty great actually! So, Christophsis hasn’t improved since I left?”

“Just kept getting worse.” Lyra said plainly. “Got decent enough business to buy that condemned ship but it’s still pretty awful there. I definitely would not miss it.”

You shot her a sympathetic look before you clapped your hands together, “Well, I better go get Shep and officially introduce you two!” You wandered away to go find the man that was busying about the area making sure things were on schedule for tonight.

Hunter waited until you were out of earshot. He placed his hands on his hips and stared at Lyra. “That was subtle.” He deadpanned.

Lyra cringed. “I’m sorry! The transmission from Echo was pretty dodgy. I couldn’t quite hear him. I just heard ‘Hunter, party, Pabu’ so I though this party was to celebrate what had happened, not as a lead up to what’s going to happen.”

Hunter heaved a weary, stressed sigh. This was beginning to become the best yet somehow worst kept secret on Pabu. He was just grateful that the one person who he really didn’t want to know still appeared to have no idea. How that was possible, he really didn’t understand since it seemed to have spread from the need-to-know people to what felt like every citizen of the island, but he didn’t want to question it too much in case he jinxed it. Each time he passed someone by, and they shot him that knowing smile, he felt a flare of panic that you would notice and start to question him but so far, you just took it as standard practice from the naturally friendly disposition of the people here. He was almost there, he just needed everyone around him to keep it together. He straightened up and signalled to Lyra to act natural as you approached them once more.

“Lyra, this is Shep. The best mayor of Pabu and overall, pretty incredible man. Shep, this is my friend Lyra.”

“Nice to meet you.” Lyra stuck her hand out with a friendly grin and nodded to you. “She’s always spoken highly of you.”

“We’ve all grown very fond of her and the rest of the family.” Shep smiled and shook her hand in return. “It’s nice to officially meet you too! You’re joining us for our little shindig? And Hunter also tells me you’re looking to live and employ yourself here?”

“Yup! Can’t keep me from a good party. And yes, if you have the space for me, I’d love to talk to you about it more!” Lyra said cheerily. “Anything I can do to help with setting up in the meantime?”

“I’m sure there’s something. It always gets chaotic in the final stages.” Shep said, sweeping his arm in front of him to guide her in the direction he was going.

“Hang on, you said-” You started to argue.

“Go enjoy your day, we’ll see you later tonight!” Shep said dismissively.

“Your cases!” Hunter called after the fading figures.

“They’re yours!” Lyra tossed over her shoulder. “Although, I’d wait until you’re alone to open yours!” She said to you specifically.

You let out a small groan. Your mind immediately entered panic mode and started jumping between every experimental or bold combination of clothing that she felt the need to put you in. She’d been on point so far, but you knew there had to be a catch at some point.

“We can take a slight detour before heading to the beach, right? It’s only a couple minutes out the way.” Hunter double checked with you.

“Yeah def-” You didn’t even get a chance to finish your sentence or pick up a box before someone swept in and addressed Hunter.

“Don’t worry, Hunter. I’m heading past your house anyway to grab some supplies we need up here. I can drop them off. You guys can carry on with your day.”

“Thanks Kyan.” Hunter said as the fisherman picked up the boxes.

“Yes, thank you so much!” You echoed as he left. “Why is everyone being so nice?” You mused as you saw him head in the direction of your home. “We’re basically passing our house anyway; we could’ve done it.”

“They’re always nice here.” Hunter said nonchalantly, hoping you wouldn’t sense his nerves increasing. He snaked an arm around your waist and guided you down the winding path.

“I guess.” You mirrored his gesture as you strolled towards the beach. “This just feels different, like they all know something we don’t.”

“I wouldn’t think too much about it.” Hunter advised. Two more hours. Only two more hours to go before the secret would finally be out in the open.

--

You and Hunter stood on an outcrop of rocks just overlooking the sea and you called over to the group of people and dog sitting on the beach. “How was the swim?”

“Amazing! You really should go for one too. The water is so nice!” Omega encouraged as she lounged on a towel, letting the warm sun dry her off. Her and Batcher had been the only one to actually enter the water, the others had only decided to get their feet wet.

“I’m good. We don’t have long before the party and I’d rather-” You sensed the threat a second to late. With a yelp, you were shoved over the edge and entered the water with a splash.

You came to the surface to the sounds of laughter from the bystanders on the beach- even the dog was barking in a way that sounded like a laugh. You glared up at the clone staring down at you with a smug grin on his face. “You mother-”

“So… how’s the water?” Hunter taunted.

Two could play this game. “Yeah, it’s great actually, you’re really missing out.” With that, you raised your hand and with a tug of the Force, Hunter swiftly tumbled into the water too.

His aggrieved shout before he hit the water was music to your ears.

“Okay, I should’ve seen that coming.” Hunter admitted through a short series of coughs as he reappeared from below the depths.

Your plan of revenge had instantly backfired given just how perfect he looked right now. Your breath hitched as you saw the way his wet hair fell around his shoulders and framed his profile as well as the way droplets of water dripped down his face. He was a sight to behold. You reached up and stroked some of his damp fringe just behind his bandana. You’re beautiful.

Hunter gulped at the compliment. It had never been a word he’d apply to himself; he didn’t really view himself in that light, it was only ever you. Yet you said it to him with such sincere feeling, he knew you meant it.

You kissed him softly before you made to swim for shore, but you didn’t get very far.

In one short stroke, Hunter reached you and kissed you fiercely.

You tangled your fingers in his damp locks with a pleasure filled sigh as you matched his strokes.

Hunter could taste the salt on your lips, and he could feel the way your body pressed against him as you grew more eager, it only spurred him on further.

The few disgruntled and offended shouts as well as a ship flying overhead caused you both to hastily pull apart.

“It’s Echo!” Omega yelled happily, wriggling out of the protective hand Wrecker had placed over her eyes- it wasn’t like she had no idea what was going on. Not waiting on the rest of them, she and Batcher dashed back towards where his ship was going to land.

“Um, so-” Hunter began awkwardly. He used to be more careful about the public displays of affection, especially around his family, but it would appear that feeling free, relaxed and in love could be quite a distraction when it wanted to be.

Should everything go to plan, they were taking her anyway, but the confirmation felt necessary. “Yes, we’ll take her tonight.” Crosshair said, shaking his head in the direction of the two of you but a smile was on his face.

“Ha! The gang’s all back!” Wrecker cheered, slapping Tech’s shoulder as he, Tech and Crosshair followed the young girl. “I can’t wait for this thing to get started!”

“Yes, this party should be quite the reunion.” Tech remarked simply as he walked and finished making the finishing touches to the repairs to his goggles.

“Echo’s taking a break from the clone rebellion for a party?” You furrowed your brow as you reached the sand and half-heartedly wrung out the edges of your top.

Hunter shrugged as he wiped some water off his face. The fact that his brother was indeed making an appearance meant a lot, but he couldn’t very well act like that in front of you. “It’s supposed to be quite the party.”

You huffed out a laugh. “Right.”

“Plus, he was right there with us, so it be a shame if he didn’t make an appearance.”

You inclined your head in acceptance of that. You then took proper notice of the way his soaked clothes clung to his toned body, emphasising very muscle. Despite the chill of the water, your blood ran hot as intense longing overcame you. You turned away from him and attempted to regain control of yourself.

Hunter noticed the way you swiftly stopped looking at him and he knew you were fighting to regain control the same way he was but, quite frankly, he didn’t want to. He came up behind you and draped his arms around your front.

You exhaled happily and leaned back against him.

“How about a shower?” He crooned in your ear as he brushed his lips just behind your ear.

You nodded dumbly as he gently nipped at your earlobe. Control was overrated.

--

You let out a squeal as the door you were pressed up against opened suddenly and you stumbled backwards- if it weren’t for the strong hands gripping your hips, you would’ve fallen straight down. Your kisses with Hunter were a passionate and frenzied mess of tongue and teeth as he backed you down the hallway, muscle memory guiding the way since neither of you wanted to pull apart, not even to catch your breath.

A trail of wet clothes marked the way through to the refresher.

A gasp left your mouth as the first cold spray of water hit you, a gasp that Hunter took full advantage off as he kissed you deeply, swallowing your groans of pleasure.

The water soon turned warm, but goosebumps still graced your skin as you were pushed up against the cool wall tiles. You leaned your head back as Hunter removed his lips from yours and began biting and kissing along your neck. “W-wait.” You managed to say breathlessly. He had always been the one to cater to your needs and you wanted nothing more than to be the one to do that for him first. He so rarely put himself first both in everyday life and in this particular regard and it was something you wanted to change.

Hunter immediately stopped and braced his hands on either side of your head, his breathing heavy as he waited until you were comfortable to carry on. Or not.

You nearly lost it at the sight of the man in front of you. Beautiful had been an understatement. He looked positively ethereal as his hair was wet and loose around his shoulders, the pieces of fringe at the front just demanding your touch. Water cascaded down his toned back and his usual caring brown eyes were nearly black with lust yet there was a slight crinkle in his brow to indicate that he was happy to wait until he knew you were okay with proceeding which only added to your desire. You inhaled deeply and pressed a seductive kiss to his mouth before you trailed your lips down his neck, kissing the hollow of his throat. You then gently pushed him away from you in order to change positions, so that he was the one against the tiles now.

Hunter looked at you questioningly but any words he was about to speak became a hoarse groan as he felt you reach down and wrap your hand around him. He tipped his head back against the tiles as you moved your hand.

You ignored the feeling of the water on your back and fixed your focus entirely on him as you kept your touches teasing, relishing each groan that left his throat. Look at me.

Hunter was all too willing to follow your instructions, but he saw you getting ready to kneel and he caught your elbow. He swallowed harshly as he rasped through the haze of pleasure you were granting him, “Y-you don’t have to. L- let me-”

You shook your head to silence his protests and paused what you were currently doing. You pressed soft, doting kisses up his thighs, before making your way up his ribs and affectionately kissing the jagged scar left by the wild reeks all those years ago and then you carried on downwards once more as you formed a path of kisses to his abdomen before you moved lower still.

“You’re always the one to give. I want you to take.” You encouraged as you licked a slow, sensual stripe along the length of him.

Hunter’s head fell back against the shower wall and a choked moan left his throat.

You stopped and tutted. You rose to your full height and grabbed the back of his neck, so he was forced to look at you once more. You needed him to watch so he knew just how much you wanted to do this for him. Keep your eyes on me. Do you think you can manage that?

Hunter just about managed to nod. He was utterly enraptured by the sight of you. Your eyes were bright and laced with longing, your heavy breaths came from lips already swollen from the kisses you’d shared and there was an overall desire that radiated from you that he was completely captivated by.  

You smirked and kissed him deeply. Good boy.

“Fuck.” Hunter breathed as he watched you go to your knees once more but even as you nodded up at him, he still found himself not wanting to take full advantage of the situation. He sought purchase against the shower walls as he fought with the primal urge within him to do what you were asking of him.

This particular scenario that you were invoking was new territory for him- you knew he would still be hesitant- so you began with that you knew would make him lose his mind and remove all doubt from his brain. You needed him to stop overthinking it and to stop being concerned with your pleasure needs for the moment.

You needed him only thinking about himself and the pleasure he wanted from you.

With his eyes still looking at you, Hunter’s hands slipped against the slick tiles as he fought against the impulse to tangle his fingers in your wet hair as each frustratingly slow and light touch had him losing his mind. Your name left his mouth in a cracked whisper as he pleaded, “P-please.”

Please what? You replied innocently. You looked up at him as you carried on, keeping your pace slow and your ministrations featherlight.

The alluring glint in your eyes had him swallowing hard as he searched for his voice. “I need- fuck- I need more…” He made a move to drop one of his hands but stopped. “Sweetheart, I-”  

You only need to take. You reminded as you placed light kisses along him.

At your words and as the instinctual need for release finally took over, Hunter found himself fisting your hair and guiding your mouth down the length of him.

You groaned appreciatively at the action.

Hunter released a choked gasp as the vibrations from your throat only added to the sensation that he was getting utterly lost in. And he was continuing to follow your instructions and he could understand why you’d laid them out. Watching your eyes flutter shut in pleasure as you accepted him made him close to finishing right then and there and he had gain control quickly or this would be over too soon.

You were compliant to his every move, making sure every response you gave him was what he wanted. His own moans and the broken praise emitting from his lips for you as he grew more and more caught up in finding gratification drove you on as he claimed your throat in the way you had been waiting for him to do.

His gruff sighs made your own simmering arousal burn red hot in your veins.

This was exactly what you wanted.

You wanted him incoherent.

You wanted him to let go.

You wanted him to focus on himself.

The release Hunter was chasing arrived faster than he’d anticipated but he couldn’t bring himself to pull away from you. you felt too good. The best he could do was attempt a hoarse, stammered warning, “I’m gonna- oh fuck-” He kept looking at you and a new longing took a hold of him, the one he had before this began. “I want to taste y– I need to tou- fuck you’re doing so well-” But he still couldn’t stop despite him meaning the words he was blabbering. “I’m- wait-”

You already knew he was nearing his climax by the way his hips stuttered but you didn’t want him to hold back. You clasped his free hand in encouragement and kept yourself right where you were. It’s okay, I want it.

That was all he needed. With a loud and hoarse shout, Hunter reached that sweet moment of ecstasy.

You stayed strong, only stopping when he demandingly pulled you to your feet and before you could even process what had happened, your back was to the shower wall once more, Hunter’s body pressed tight up against yours as his lips crashed into yours.

Hunter could taste the remnants of his release on your tongue, and it prompted him to hold the hinge of your jaw to tip your head back as he licked into your mouth. A deep growl sounding from him as he did so.

You welcomed his kiss and matched his intensity as you pawed at his muscled back as if you could somehow remove every inch of offensive space between you.

Hunter finally pulled away for air, but he raised your arms above your head and pressed your wrists into the wall.

It was hard to imagine that not 30 seconds ago, you had reduced this man to a tongue-tied, purely desire driven mess. Yet now the positions had rapidly switched.

Hunter licked the water away from your neck, smiling against your skin as he felt your pulse quicken at the action. He kept one hand entrapping your wrists, but he slowly brought his other hand down, his fingertips steadily descending down your arm. “Do you know why I so rarely let you do that for me?”

You shook your head; you didn’t trust that actual words would exit your lips. Goosebumps graced your body at his touch.

“Because as talented as you are at that and as grateful as I am for you allowing me to do that…” He nuzzled his nose against the side of yours before he kissed the corner of your mouth, pulling away ever so slightly as you turned your head to kiss him properly.

The roguish, teasing grin on his face made your breath catch in your throat. Your desire grew more intense as his already low, smoky voice somehow went an octave lower and his seductive words sounded more like a deep growl as he spoke to you, and it made you weak at the knees. Your chest heaved as each yearning breath left your lungs as you watched him.

He caressed your cheek. “There’s something else that also brings me that much pleasure…” He kissed along your jaw before he carried on with his plan.

You could only observe him, the sight of his lust-fuelled gaze and the way he was suddenly so in control made your want for him burn that much hotter.

Hunter then rested his hand just at the hollow of your throat, feeling a shuddering breath leave you as you swallowed, he glanced up at your face which was watching him with both heightened curiosity and desperation as you waited for him to touch you were he knew you needed him to.

He trailed his fingers sensually down the rest of your torso before moving them tenderly up the inside of your thighs, a hint of delight flowing through him as he already felt how ready you were for him already and it was all from what had just transpired– he was yet to do anything. “Because when I touch you here…” He murmured as he ever so slightly rubbed that sensitive spot between your legs, delighting in the gasp that sounded from your lips. “I can watch you fall apart…”

A whimper sounded from your throat.

“And when I kiss you here…” He stopped his movements for the most part, instead just tenderly rubbing faint circles with his thumb as he mouthed his way down your body.

Your breathing was leaving you in short, sharp pants.

“I can watch you fall apart on my tongue.” With that, he lifted your leg onto his shoulder before his mouth joined where his fingers were. An eager moan came from his own lips as he finally got to taste you and for the moment, he wanted to savour this. You were a craving- an addiction- that he couldn’t get enough of. He was in no rush, and he draw this out for as long as you both could handle it.

His name fell from your lips through a raspy groan. He knew your body so damn well and that was both a blessing and a curse. He was barely giving you enough to gain any form of satisfaction but yet it was just enough to drive you crazy with need. You scrambled for a grip on the slippery tiles as desperate cries sounded from you. One hand fumbled against the small shelf as a particularly wicked curl of his fingers made a jolt of pleasure rush through you and various shower supplies came tumbling down with an unnecessarily loud crash but neither of you paid them any attention, instead you merely clamped that hand over your mouth to quiet yourself.

“You know I want to hear you, sweetheart.” Hunter crooned as he stopped what he was doing. The demand needed to be met before he would continue.

You nodded, through a pleasure induced daze as you removed your hand. You had to keep reminding yourself that you had a place of your own now and you could be as free as you wanted to be, there was no risk of being overheard or interrupted but it was a habit that was still proving difficult to break.

As he finally showed willing to bring you closer to the point of release, your mewls of pleasure left you without restraint.

Hunter hummed out his approval as he put his mouth back on you and began moving his fingers once more, and this time, he wasn’t drawing anything out.

He wanted to watch you come.

He angled his eyes up as he found that spot that he knew would have you finding your release in no time. He let out his own appreciative sigh as he saw the way your eyes flickered shut, as he saw the way your brow furrowed, and your lips parted in sweet relief as those special breathy sighs exited from them, signally that you were close.  

You arched your back as you went tumbling towards that blissful climax and you finished with a strangled groan, your hands tangling in Hunter’s soaked hair to ground yourself as he worked you through it.

Hunter made sure you were back to being steady on your feet before he prompted you to face the wall so he could press loving, accepting kisses to the scars on your back. “I love you... so much.” He nearly found himself following that up with the question, but he stopped himself. Too much had been planned and he knew exactly how he wanted to do it. He wasn’t about to ruin it with getting too caught up in this wonderful moment.

“I love you too.” You replied softly.

Hunter placed one last kiss between your shoulder blades before he gathered up the fallen shower products that had scattered around his feet.

You braced your forehead on the cool tiles to gather yourself once more. For a moment the only sounds were the steady of jets of shower water and Hunter placing the items back on their shelf,

“Okay… so… now we need to do the actual showering part.” You said breathlessly as you finally turned around and brushed back his fringe pieces.

Hunter chuckled and nodded his agreement. “We have a party to get to after all.”

--

“Hey, I have a question.” You asked casually as you appreciatively watched Hunter get dressed. You had made no such moves yet and were instead lounging on your bed still in your bathrobe.

“What’s that?” Hunter asked as he finished buttoning his shirt.

“How important is it that we attend this party?”

A wave of panic hit him, and he had to rely on old training to keep his voice steady. “Is everything okay?” Even with his fast-acting composure, he could tell his voice was strained but if you noticed, you didn’t call on it since you carried on as normal in your response.

“Well, no. After that display in the shower, I find myself not quite wanting to be so social.”

Hunter held back his sigh of relief. This was something he could handle just fine. It wasn’t your fault that you were looking to cause a bit of trouble, he was just glad that there wasn’t a more serious reason to your original question because that would make the rest of this evening rather tricky. “Given the fact that they’re having it in our honour, I’d say it’s pretty important that we go.”

You shuffled to the end of the bed and sat up. You caught his hand as he walked by you. “But there are five other honouree people that are going…”

“Sweetheart…” He really had to figure out how to navigate this without giving anything away.

“Now let’s see…” You feigned pondering as you went through the options in your head and rubbed your thumb along his hand. “We’ve already done the bed, the shower, the table, the couch and the counter…”

Hunter’s attempt at swallowing was interrupted as various memories flashed through his head, some highlights being your thighs wrapped around his head, you straddling his lap and his handprints imprinting on the glass of the kitchen cabinets. It was true that he had been rather insatiable lately and you had been all too willing and happy to match his enthusiasm but now was the time for self-control. He released a choked cough as he attempted to steady himself.

“But I don’t believe we’ve done a wall yet...” You said coyly as you started to pull down the arm of your bathrobe to expose more of your clavicle. You also spread your legs a little wider, so the fabric hitched up your thighs as you nodded to the dresser behind him. “Or the bureau…”

Hunter released a guttural, unrestrained groan before he kissed you. Hard. But just as you threaded your fingers in his hair and made to pull him on top of you, he found himself once more. He had to act now, or he’d never want to leave here. He stepped away and stopped your hand that was continuing to lower the shoulder of your robe, but he couldn’t help but notice the few remaining water droplets on your neck that were calling to be kissed away.  

“Hunter…” You pretended to pout as you gently yanked on the loose ends of his shirt, so he was forced to come and stand between your legs.

Hunter pushed down on your shoulders and your arms above your head. “Go.” A chaste kiss to your lips. “Get.” Another quick kiss. “Dressed.” He placed one final brief kiss to your mouth before he readjusted the shoulder of your dressing gown.

“The robe has to come off to do that though.” You whispered as you placed a tender kiss to his mouth.

Hunter huffed out a laugh as he stood tall once more. He quickly walked out the room before you had the chance to accidentally ruin everything he had put together. “Don’t take too long!” He called back to you.

You released a heavy, grounding sigh before you sat up and hopped off the bed and your eyes caught sight of the case. With apprehensive curiosity, you strolled over to the new package that Lyra had gifted you, bracing yourself for what was going to be revealed.

You unclasped the lock, but you were pleasantly surprised by what was inside. It was a variety of sundresses, each one a similar design but in a variety of colours. They were a new thing for you to try but you figured a party could call for doing something different, plus you couldn’t wait to see Hunter’s reaction to something like this.

You picked out a red dress and was unsurprised to see that it fit you just right. You had a rummage through the rest of the box to see if there was anything else or if it was just those dresses, but you regretted that immediately.

A horrified, strangled breath left you as you saw the three sets of lace lingerie. A red, a black and a white set were all folded neatly at the bottom of the box. You held up the red set and recognised the design immediately. You muttered a series of curse words to yourself before your eyes caught sight of a small black silk bag and the items in there left you frozen in shock. This was something you would have to keep well hidden. You slammed the lid shut and shoved it to the back of the shared closest.

--

You quietly walked down the short hallway towards the front room which served as an open planned area with a kitchen and living space. You leaned against the wall and a smile graced your face as you watched the domestic scene with fond affection- Hunter had just finished gathering and hanging up your sodden beach clothes and was proceeding to put away some dry dishes. It made your heart soar that he had settled into the domesticity of the island and the routine here so well, it made making a life with him here all the more appealing.

As much as you enjoyed watching him, and as much as you would enjoy just staying in, you knew he wanted to go to the party, and you knew you would have a good time once you were there. You just wanted a little bit more fun first. “Zip me up?”

Hunter half-turned from where he was putting away a plate, but he forgot how to both breathe and operate as a functioning human as he saw you. The dish slipped out of his hands and smashed against the ground.

You smirked. That had gone even better than you’d expected. “Hmm, that’s an interesting technique. Sure, it saves space but I’m not sure how sustainable it is in the long run.”

Hunter struggled to find his voice. He bent down to gather the broken pieces and throw them away to try to buy himself some recovery time, but it didn’t help. All he could do was stare at you. The red sundress you were wearing complimented you perfectly and it showed off your body to the best degree. You were, to put it mildly, simply stunning and suddenly, his entire operation for this evening didn’t seem that important anymore.

You whistled and waved your hand in an attempt to bring his attention back. “Hey, Hunter, my zip?” With that, you turned around and waited.

Hunter wasn’t sure how he willed his feet to move but he soon found himself behind you.

His knuckles grazed your skin as he slowly brought the zip up your body and attached the small clasp at the top. His jaw was clenched tight as he caught a whiff of the body wash and lotion you had used, and it was getting harder and harder to find the willpower to step away from you. He had a plan. He’d had this plan for weeks yet one look at you in this dress and he was seriously considering throwing it all out the window and to hell with the consequences of it. “You look beautiful.” He said through a deep exhale. Just one more hour. He only had to make it one more hour.

“Thank you.” You said quietly as you too worked on calming yourself.

You turned to face him. “You look pretty good too.” You complimented as you gave him an appraising look up and down– in your attempts to distract him, you’d failed to properly take him in before. He wasn’t quite wearing a suit- it would be too hot for that tonight- but the lightweight formal black button-down shirt and matching black bottoms fit his frame handsomely, and to make himself even more appealing, he had rolled the sleeves up to his forearms. “New one of Lyra’s?” You guessed as you smoothed down the front of your dress.

Hunter nodded. He didn’t offer too much detail because much of what was in his box consisted of proper suits for him and his brothers that he hoped would be useful in the near future.

“Gotta hand it to her, she knows what she’d doing.” You mused before you loosened your shoulders and linked your arm through Hunter’s elbow. “Come on, we’ve got a celebration to get to.”

--

Night had fallen but the area on the colonnade was all lit up by the warm orange glow of a vast number of lanterns. The party was in full swing. Food and drinks were already flowing, and the music was getting many people up and dancing.

A playful wolf-whistle greeted you and Hunter as the two of you entered the scene.

“Damn, I am too good. What a fine-looking couple you two are.”

Evidently, by the cheery and slightly lopsided way Lyra walked over to you, she had been hitting the punch pretty hard already.

“Having a good time?” You asked with a laugh.

“Very! This party is fantastic! Everyone here is so nice! And I got the job!!”

“Lyra, that’s awesome!” You hugged her tightly.

“Congrats.” Hunter offered mildly but sincerely.

“So, better get used to having me around. And that’s just as well cause you’ll need me to des-” She quickly cut herself off. It would appear that alcohol only aided the inability to keep a secret.

“Want a drink?” Hunter asked you swiftly before you could follow up on her comment.

You nodded. “I just gotta talk to Lyra about something.”

Hunter couldn’t very well insist you join him, but he only hoped what you needed to talk about wasn’t close to what would hopefully unfold tonight. He squeezed your hand before he hastily walked towards the drinks stand.

You faced Lyra once more after he was a suitable distance away. “Now, I’m happy for you but also rather irritated with you.”

“Why?” Lyra asked innocently as she brought the cup to her lips to hide her grin.

You didn’t believe her lack of awareness for an instant. “You put those in that case? What were you thinking?” You hissed.

“Why not? You were willing to before everything went to shit. I remembered the design and everything! And you have more options now!”

You shook your head. “I was feeling brave back then, that feeling has since passed.”

Lyra scoffed, “Please, with the way the two of you are, I’m surprised you haven’t done something like that already.”

“You’ve got a retired clone sergeant and a retired ex-Jedi living on a tropical island, things aren’t exactly crazy around here. I’ve lost my bold and brave streak.” You didn’t think she needed to know what had had gone on in the shower and the times before her arrival because that would only aid her argument if you were being perfectly honest.

Lyra merely rolled her eyes. “It’s not a battlefield. It’s a totally great way to switch things up, especially now that you’re in a secure living situation and you would both feel and looking fucking sexy. Plus, I bet you he would drop to his knees and do whatever you wanted if he saw you in one.”

“I will never- hey.” You relaxed quickly and cleared your throat as Hunter rejoined you.

“Did I interrupt something?” Hunter asked with a glance between the two of you as he passed you your drink.

Lyra angled herself towards him. “Hunter, let me ask you a question. If she had certain-”

“You interrupted nothing.” You interjected sharply.

“Um okay.” Hunter didn’t press the matter of whatever it was the two of you were debating. “Come on, the others are over there.” He pointed to where the bulk of the dancing and partying was taking place.

“Just think about it!” Lyra implored.

You glared at her as Hunter led you away.  

Lyra simply grinned and raised her glass in your direction. “Enjoy the party!”

--

The time was drawing near, and Hunter was just confirming with Shep that everything was set for when he got back when Hunter noticed you and Crosshair sitting and chatting, but you were also swaying to the beat of the music. He bade Shep farewell before he approached you.

--

The party was still going full swing and after you had the chance to catch up with Echo, you and Crosshair had retired to a seat on the side to people watch. The two of you sat in comfortable silence as you casually observed the goings on around you. There was a healthy split between the people by the food and drink area and on the dancefloor. Wrecker was enthusiastically dancing with Omega and Lyana and Phee, Tech and Echo were engaged in a pleasant conversation a few metres away and Hunter was chatting to Shep by the bar.

“So, you’re really sure about him?” Crosshair asked, breaking the silence first.

You frowned in utter confusion as you angled your head to face him. “What kind of a question is that?”

Crosshair shrugged. “Just checking.”

“You’re leaving that a bit late down the road are you not?” You were baffled by his sudden interest in the status of your relationship.

“Well, I haven’t been here for all of it. Trust me, I’m for grateful for that than I’m not. You two can be pretty sickening.” He added cheekily.

You rolled your eyes at his true Crosshair mannerisms. “So, is this your bizarre way of being a protective brother?”

“I’m looking out for both of you. He has some pretty annoying habits you know. I’d hate for you to be stuck with him before you fully knew what you were getting into.”

You snorted. “I’m all good, thanks Crosshair.”

Crosshair waited a beat of silence before his voice turned more serious. “Just don’t hurt him, alright? He’s been hurt enough already, we all have, the cycle has to end at some point.”

Your gaze softened. “I won’t ever hurt him.” You squeezed his left hand in reassurance before the two of you went back to relaxed quiet and you saw Hunter making his way towards you.  

The music turned slow and that caused a brief dispersal of the dance floor, which included Wrecker, Lyana and Omega to depart.  

--

Hunter reached you and held out his hand in invitation. “Come on.”

You looked at his extended hand, then at his face to see that he was totally serious. “Since when can you dance?” You asked, completely taken aback.

Hunter, nodded to Crosshair. “Back when we were first getting success as a squad, we thought it would be a way to impress anyone that came into 79s when we had leave from the war.”

You directed your question to both of them. “Did it work?”

Crosshair smirked as he said, “It worked for one of us.”

You laughed as you glanced to Hunter and said with a teasing lilt to your voice, “If you’re that bad at it, I don’t know if I want to.”

Hunter sighed. “Hey, I wasn’t bad, I had options, I just had a bad habit of failing to follow through.”

Crosshair continued to goad him. “Is that how you’re remembering it?”

Hunter’s voice went more defensive than he would’ve liked as he addressed his brother. “What about that red head who kept coming to our table the night we were celebrating the win at Boz Pity. She kept talking to me, remember that?”

“I remember who she left with.” Crosshair replied smugly.

You, having enjoyed watching their brotherly spat, took Hunter’s hand to stop the dispute going any further. “I will say, dance lessons were not really on the teaching agenda for Jedi, especially during the war, I don’t know-”

Hunter pulled you to your feet. “I promise to not let you trip.”

You reluctantly complied. “And if I stand on your toes?”

Hunter just led you to where the other people were dancing. “I won’t even react. And it’s slow music, I doubt you could inflict much damage.”

“You underestimate me.” You mumbled nervously.

--

“You’re too tense.” Hunter observed as he watched the way your eyes were fixed firmly on the ground.

“This is how your feet will continue to have feeling.” You grunted as you kept an intense focus on your movements. Even though the two of you were mostly slowly moving in beat to the soft music, your grip on his hand was tight and the one on his shoulder was digging into him.

Hunter released a low chuckle. “Here. Try this.” He adjusted the stance, so your arms were around the back of his neck and his coiled around your waist, so the front of your body was close to his. Now, the two of you pretty much stayed put and just enjoying the moment of being in each other’s company.

“I find it hard to believe you never followed through.” You uttered in quiet disbelief. The two of you weren’t moving from your spot all that much but the secure way he held you and the aura of calm confidence he projected was making it hard to think straight.

“It never felt right.”  

You hummed out a pleased sigh as you placed your head in the crook of his neck.

“I guess I was just waiting for you.” Hunter added softly as he rested his head against yours.

You removed your head from the crook of his neck, and you saw the heartfelt meaning behind his eyes. You leaned up to kiss him and for a minute, the entire buzz of the party faded away and it was just you and him sharing in a loving moment together.

As music the music came to a stop, Hunter whispered in your ear, “Want to get outta here?”

You nodded silently and intertwined his hand in yours.

Hunter took a deep breath as he led you away.

Ten minutes left.

--

The rest of them had gathered to watch the two of you leave.

“Let’s go!” Omega gasped eagerly.

“Hold on, kid.” Echo caught her arm as she went to dash after them. “Five-minute head start, remember?”

“Right, right.” Omega agreed as she recalled the particular details of the plan.

“Technically, only Echo should be the one going.” Tech reminded.

“Yeah, Tech, I don’t really think that was ever going to happen.” Echo replied simply.

“Damn right! We’re all getting to see this!” Wrecker argued.

Echo raised his eyebrows in Tech’s direction. “See. And you were never going to stay because you kept talking about recording it anyway.” He pointed out.

“My phrase was merely pointing out that we are all ignoring a part of the plan Hunter quite specifically told the rest of us not to get involved with.” Tech responded.

“We’re not big on following orders.” Omega said with a shrug.

“If you’re all done debating what is a pointless argument because we were all always going to watch, it’s time to go.” Crosshair drawled.

--

“Uh, Hunter, home is that way?” You pointed in the direction he was currently walking in the opposite direction of.

“How about a beach walk first?” Hunter offered.

You gave him a surprised smile but nodded your agreement.

--

It didn’t matter how much reassurance he’d received in the recent weeks that you would say yes. His heart was damn near pounding out his chest the closer the two of you got to the sight and his mind started to spiral. What if you said no? What if you hated the very idea? He should’ve spoken to you about this first but wait, there was something to be said for knowing when it felt right wasn’t there? But maybe he should’ve-

“Your palm is sweaty.” You stopped and got him to face you. “And it’s not just cause of that that I can tell that you’re nervous.”

Great, so much careful planning and keeping you away from people that were far too eager to give you hints and his own usually steady nerves were about to give it all away. He had done everything right so far yet now he was a sweaty mess.

“Hunter, is everything okay?”

“Everything-” Dammit his voice came out all cracked. He cleared his throat and started again. “Everything is fine, I promise.” He started to guide you again. “If you just follow me a little bit further…”

“Follow you to what? Why are you being so…” Your voice trailed off and released an awed gasp as you saw the scene ahead of you. A small section of the beach was set up with a canopy and illuminated in a warm glow by strings of lights and a short carpet led the way inside. “What occasion have I forgotten and how quickly can I make it up to you?” You said as you started to panic.

Hunter was quick to reassure you. “You haven’t forgotten anything, and I think we stopped keeping track of things like that a long time ago.”

“Well, aren’t we the romantic pair.” You said dryly as you looked on in wonder at the fairy lights around you before the two of you came to a stop at the end of the walkway and stood in front of a  

“I think we do alright.” Right on queue, the puck began to play the video Tech had put together, courtesy of Hunter’s guidance.

Your throat clogged with emotion at the display in front of you. The montage was starting right from the moment you had made yourself known to the squad and to when you’d first met Hunter and it was clear something transpired between the two of you. Something that you both would dismiss or shove away for a long time.

Hunter heard the footsteps and there were more than what he had ordered. “I’ll be right back.” He kissed your temple. “Keep watching.” He instructed as he saw you getting ready to question what was going on.

You couldn’t understand why he was leaving but you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the images. It seemed it was progressing to show a mix of how your relationship had transpired over the years. From every emotionally charged yet pushed aside moment, to every squabble and every time the rest of the team trapped the two of you somewhere to talk as well as the infuriating times each of them attempted to convince either of you to do something about your feelings. It showed the highs and lows of everything that had happened since Kaller too and it reminded you of just how much you’d all endured and survived.

It was a strange thing to watch, to see how obvious your feelings were yet you knew you’d waited so long before acting on them. It was so evident that the two of you were always drawn together and it would always be that way, the love radiated through, and it was something that had continued to this day.

--

“You’re not supposed to be here.” Hunter hissed as he herded his brothers and Omega behind some rocks. Keeping this secret was hard enough and he was almost there but the appearance of his supportive and rather determined family might be the final thing that gave everything away before he had the chance to even ask you yet.

“But Echo was always allowed to-” Omega started to protest quietly.

“I needed him here.” Hunter couldn’t risk receiving this item until the last minute since he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hide it well enough from you and the last thing he wanted was you to find it accidentally before he had the chance to do things how he wanted.

“Here it is.” Echo handed said item over to him.

“Thank you.” Hunter said appreciatively as he took the small velvet encased box. “But how hard did you try telling this lot not to come down?”

“Eh, not very.” Echo admitted simply. “Come on, Hunter. We all wanted to be here to watch this.”

Hunter did know that, and he wasn’t truly upset, he actually really appreciated everything they’d all helped with. “Alright, alright. Just keep quiet, please?”

Everyone nodded.

Hunter knew they were never going to follow that, but he didn’t have time to push the matter.

“Better get going. By my calculations, the video should be finishing in the next minute.” Tech informed him.

--

The video came to an end, and you couldn’t believe Hunter missed sharing this with you. You sensed him approach but as you turned to question why he’d left, your breath caught in your throat, and you forgot how to form words as you saw him down on one knee and presenting a ring to you.

--

Hunter had rehearsed this so many times, yet his adrenaline was pumping like crazy, but he was determined to see this through to its proper end. He wasn’t about to ruin it because he got jittery. He took a deep, grounding breath before he started to speak. He kept his voice low and though he spoke quietly, he filled each word with intense and sincere meaning.

“I spent so much of the war doing what was asked of me. Winning each battle, completing each mission and that was easy for me, it was comfortable, I knew what I was doing, what my responsibilities were but I was also running on autopilot. I kept moving, doing what needed to be done, it was a routine that I didn’t see myself really breaking f-from. Un-”

He paused to settle his own emotions that rising in his chest and throat. “Until you. You came into my life, and I’d never known I’d been living in a galaxy of grey until I met you and you, with your fire and your strength, brought the colour I’d been missing. You could probably tell from that holo, but everything changed that day and I’ve never been more grateful for it. I knew from the second we met on Devaron that I was hooked. I was yours and I never wanted you to leave. I love you.” He said fiercely. “I love all of you. I love your kindness. I love your mind. I love your courage. I even love your stubbornness, no matter how much stress it causes me. I love how, no matter what, you don’t stop fighting. I love having you by my side, even if you’re arguing with me. I love how you’re always ready to face whatever is sent your way, unless it’s a spider and then you’re more than happy to surrender the room.” He added, the corner of his mouth twitching to hide his teasing grin before he carried on, “I love how you are with Omega. I love how well you fit in with my brothers. I love you in a way I’d never seen myself capable of, yet you make it so easy to do. We’ve been through so much; I’ve nearly lost you more times than I care to count but it also told me something…”

He allowed himself a second to breathe before he went into the final part, “I want it all with you. I know we’ve already got the home, the kid and the dog, and you’ve got the crazy in-laws.” He smiled as you let out a choked but genuine laugh at that. “I want to take the final step with you which is why I’m down on one knee and asking you this question...” He inhaled as he finally asked, “Will you marry me?” He finished and waited anxiously. He really hoped the silent tears running down your face were happy ones.

--

“Wrecker, get in the back, I need to record this, and I cannot see past you.” Tech demanded in a hushed whisper as the four of them watched from behind a cluster of rocks.

“Did she say yes? I can’t hear anything.” Wrecker asked, his voice rising slightly in distress. He didn’t want to miss any of this.

Crosshair spoke up next, “I see tears so it could go either way.”

Omega slapped his arm. “I’m sure they’re happy tears.” 

“Here’s an idea… why don’t we wait to see it all play out first before we start talking about it?” Echo suggested sensibly.

--

His family were quite possibly the least subtle people on the planet. Hunter still hadn’t heard your answer yet, but he could hear them no problem. He waved a hand behind him to signal at them to shut up.

A happy sob mixed with laughter echoed from your lips as you looked past him saw the group of people further down the beach keenly looking on.

You brought your eyes back to Hunter. You had so many things you wanted to say, so many affirmations you wanted to give yet the first dumb thing that left your mouth was an answer in the form of a question, “Are you sure?”

Hunter chuckled as he placed the ring on your finger, the stones dazzling under the moon and fairy light.  “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

You flexed your hand as you admired the stunning ring. The design of the silver band was simple with a white round cluster diamond in the centre but what really got to you was the two smaller blue diamonds on either side of it. Their shade was exactly like that of your old lightsaber. Your words left you in a frantic state of joy. “It’s beautiful- You got- how- I mean-” You couldn’t find the words. Instead, you just fell to your knees in front of him and kissed him fervently. I love you; I love you; I love you.

Hunter cradled your face in his hands as he pulled away for a short moment to respond, “I love you too.”

Feeling a bit more collected, you pressed your forehead against his. And I meant to say that I am yours too. I may not have realised it then, but I was yours on Devaron. I saw you, spoke to you and I’d never experienced a feeling like that before. I’d spent so much time doubting if I’d made the right choice by leaving the Order, if I was wrong for believing what I did, but then I met this squad. You retreated a couple inches to look Hunter directly in his brown eyes which were filled with emotion, and you added even more devotion to your tone. And I met you and suddenly I finally realised what I’d been missing. So, yes. Yes, I would love to marry you.

Hunter grinned adoringly at you before he kissed you again. Both of you smiling hard as you kissed one another in short, passionate bursts.

A series of whoops and gleeful cries interrupted your moment and the two of you got to your feet just as Wrecker bounded over and picked the two of you up, squeezing tightly.

“Congratulations!!” Wrecker bellowed as he put you down again.

“I’m so happy for you!” Omega cried as she and Batcher went next. She wrapped her arms around both your waists and the dog took turns jumping up on the two of you. “Let me see the ring!” Omega requested enthusiastically as she pulled away from you both. “Ah it’s so pretty!”

“About time.” Echo said kindly with Crosshair nodding in agreement.  

“Indeed.” Tech concurred as he too smiled at you both.

“You all knew?” You asked as you wiped away a few remaining tears with your uncaptured hand.

“You think Hunter could pull this off by himself?” Crosshair said with a mocking scoff in his brother’s direction, but he gave you both a genuine and pleased smile.

“Look, I had the ideas and I just needed help with the logistics of everything.” Hunter still felt the need to clarify.

“So, all of this…” You trailed off and gestured to the stunning set up that had been arranged.

“Yeah, they all helped me out.” Hunter told you. “And it wasn’t like I’d be able to keep it from them anyway.”

“All of you helped?” You repeated again. What had you done to deserve finding such a perfect family?

“I obviously put together the video and I was recording this moment.” Tech stated, adjusting his goggles. “It’s just as well I back everything up or the Marauder getting destroyed would’ve proven to be more problematic than it already was.”

“And Omega and I set this up!” Wrecker boasted proudly.

“And I helped with the ring.” Echo said. “Hunter laid out the design and I knew a guy who knew a guy who owed him a favour.”

“And you?” You asked Crosshair with a smile.

Crosshair feigned an aggrieved sigh.

“You were too late in claiming the set-up job.” Tech recalled. “And Echo and I had very clear responsibilities, you were just too slow.”

“Yes, Crosshair, unfortunately, had the worst job out of all of them.” Hunter revealed.

“Oh?” You regarded Crosshair curiously.

“I had to listen to him panic over and over again about every single detail and doubt in his head over this whole thing. Didn’t matter that we all knew you were going to say yes, he was a nervous wreck. It was up to me to keep him sane.”  Crosshair told you. He truly hadn’t minded, and it had offered more opportunities for him to hone his skills since he was a hand down.

You looked at the man who was usually so put together and who had never let even the most daunting of chaotic war battles phase him. “Seriously?”

Hunter nodded and awkwardly rubbed his hand along the side of his neck. “Yeah, he was the one I needed to knock some sense into me, sometimes literally I might add.” He said with a pointed look in Crosshair’s direction.  

“That way worked the best.” Crosshair said with a nonchalant shrug.

Hunter turned to you again, “And it still wasn’t enough. Believe it or not, I didn’t want to start sweating beforehand.”

You laughed before you addressed all of them. “Thank you. All of you. This was absolutely perfect! I’m so grateful!”

Another group hugged happened before Wrecker and Omega excitedly bounced on soles of their feet.

“Come on, the party’s just getting started!” Wrecker urged.

“Wait, I thought-” You broke off and looked to Hunter.

Hunter gave you a knowing grin. “You didn’t think the people of Pabu were going to let this go uncelebrated, did you?”

You inhaled sharply. “This party…”

“Is also serving as a congratulations on getting engaged.” Tech confirmed as he walked past you. “Hunter and Shep thought the whole thing through.”

“It’s a good thing you said yes or that would’ve been really awkward.” Echo commented with a smile as he too headed back up.

Well, that explained why Hunter was so dismissive of the change in attitudes the two of you had received in recent times as well as his caginess towards certain phrases or questions you asked. And Lyra’s sudden appearance as well as her ‘gifts’ checked out a bit more too. You stared at Hunter, incredibly impressed. “You somehow managed to plan this entire thing and I had no idea?”

Hunter nodded. “A lot of kind people live around us, but the price of their assistance was that they’re terrible at secret keeping and also made my life a living hell.” Hunter kidded before he kissed you once more and led you back the way you came, the delightful cold metal of your ring pressing against his fingers.

--

The walk back up to the colonnade was filled with cheers and celebratory whistles as the two of you reappeared. Much of the party remained the same except now a huge congratulations banner was on display.

Shep came over to you and hugged you. “Congratulations!”

“Thank you, Shep. For all of it. This is amazing!” You returned his warm embrace.

Shep parted and shook Hunter’s hand. “Everything go well?”

“Very. Thank you for all your help. I couldn’t have done it without you.” Hunter said gratefully.

“I’m just glad you finally did it. We were all losing hope that it wasn’t going to happen.”

“They were?” You nudged Hunter’s shoulder playfully.

“After we recovered from Tantiss, I was apparently still moving too slowly.” Hunter said lightly.

“We need not dwell on such things now. Please, enjoy the celebrations!” Shep waved goodbye as he went to make the rounds once more.

“Incoming.” Hunter warned you.

“What-” You were nearly tackled by the woman who had clattered into your side.

“About damn time!”

 “That seems to be the general consensus.” You said as you steadied yourself against Lyra’s eager hug.

“Let me see!” Lyra took your hand and gasped in admiration. “Oh, it’s gorgeous!” She then looked to Hunter. “You did good, well done!” She swivelled her attention back to you. “And you! You are going to get the best wedding dress ever! I have so many designs in mind already!”

“Can’t wait for that.” You said and you meant it but that didn’t stop the wary laugh you emitted either.

“My drink is empty, but we will talk more!” With that, she hurried away.

“I’m never going to be able to keep up with her on anything.” You commented as you watched her go, a soft smile on your face.

“Rather you than me. I’m all set.” Hunter said smugly.

Your response was interrupted by an approaching Rodian.

“Courtesy of Phee.”

You and Hunter took the cocktails from the tray the rather timid new island resident offered and looked into each other’s eyes as you clinked glasses. The two of you too caught up in the bliss of the moment to notice that your cinnamon sugar-rimmed glass had tracings of a white powder mixed in amongst it.

--

The next morning

To say you felt like hell would be an understatement. You awakened with a deep groan and rolled over onto your front.

Hunter woke up to the sound and saw that you were awake, but you were face down in your pillow. “And how are you feeling this morning?” He quipped.

You groaned again. “I am going to say this with all the love I can possibly muster… fuck off.” The threat lost some weight since your voice was muffled by the presence of the pillow.

“I didn’t think Jedi could get hungover.” Hunter said, a teasing lilt to his voice.

“Yes well, I was always making waves one way or another and here is another prime example of that. How many of those damn Phee cocktails did I drink?”

“I only saw you drink one, but the party ran late, and we weren’t together the entire time, but you were with Lyra a bunch, so I figured you were going her pace. You were pretty out of it when we were heading home, you fell asleep instantly.”

The entire evening post that one cocktail was a total blur, so you just had to accept that. The deep pain and nausea you were experiencing just had to be the effects of a first and truly awful hangover. “I’m so sorry. I really didn’t plan on that at all.”

Hunter shushed your unnecessarily apology and placed light kisses along your shoulders and down your spine. “What do you need?”

“A lobotomy and a new stomach.” You grunted.

“Naturally… and if I can’t get that arranged?”

You angled your head to face him and rubbed your thumb along his cheek affectionately. “I just need a few hours alone to sleep it off, I’ll be okay.”

Hunter got out of bed and quietly got dressed. “I’ll see what I can find to help. I’ll be back in an hour.” He lightly squeezed your shoulder

You watched him leave and let that concern you’d been feeling take hold. You felt absolutely exhausted and though you’d never been hungover before, something about this felt different but you couldn’t think of what or why that would be.

You pushed it to the back of your mind for now and focused on sleeping and feeling better. You had a future to plan, you weren’t about to let this throw a wrench in things.

--

Hunter had been waylaid by more people who he didn’t have the time to both thank and accept their congratulations from so he was later than he’d told you but the minute he entered the house, he knew something was wrong and it wasn’t because he was late.

That was when he heard the sounds of someone- well it would only be you- graphically vomiting. He dumped the supplies he’d gathered and hustled to the open refresher door where you were hunched over the toilet.

“Sweetheart, how long have you been like this?” Hunter asked, his concern evident as he rushed in and took over holding your hair just as you finished throwing up.

“Uh, when did you leave?” You rasped through sore, heavy breaths as you righted yourself but still remained slouched against small gap between the toilet and the shower.

“An hour and a half ago.” Hunter said quietly as he sat down next to you and stroked your knee in a soft, consoling gesture.

“Oh good, I got to sleep for thirty minutes.” You said wryly through gritted teeth. “Then I guess it’s been pretty much every ten minutes.”

Hunter got to his feet and ran a washcloth under some cold water for you before he dabbed it against your clammy forehead and the back of your neck. “You should get back to bed.” He said tenderly.

“I tried earlier but leaving the bathroom floor isn’t an opti-” You stopped short before you held your head over the toilet bowl and the whole process began again. “Any time you want to take this off, say the word.” You mumbled as you pitifully waved your left hand in Hunter’s direction before another ugly wretch sounded from you and your body heaved as somehow more vomit left your system.

“Enough of that.” Hunter soothed as he gathered your hair again. “I think we need to go see Dalia.”

You managed to shake your head just as the last of your stomach contents dispensed from your system. She was someone people go to with an actual injury or medical problem and this was certainly not that. This was just you not being able to handle your alcohol... it had to be.   

“Then how about Tech?” Hunter compromised quietly as he rubbed delicate circles on your back.

You resisted the urge to wince at the action that usual would bring you comfort but instead was only sharpening the thankfully now dulling ache in your limbs. “No, no. I’m-” You sat back once more and shakily got to your feet. “I think I just hurled my entire insides out which seems to have helped.” You accepted the water from him, and you had to make a conscious effort to drink slowly since your parched and sore throat welcomed the cool liquid. The nausea and general bodily pain were less, and you didn’t want to make a fuss, especially after all that had been done for you the night before. “I’m feeling better.” You said but as you went to step out the refresher, you immediately became lightheaded and swayed violently on your feet.

“Sweetheart, please.” Hunter implored as he caught your shoulders. He’d seen hangovers but this seemed more serious than your typical post drinking consequences and it was worrying him.

“Okay, we can start with Tech.” You conceded as the room finally came back into focus.

“I’ll comm him.”

“No, I want to walk. I don’t think being cooped up is doing me any favours.” You said as firmly as you could convey.

Even in your weakened state, Hunter could tell that was a point he wasn’t going to win an argument on. He gently placed his arm around you as you gingerly made your way to the door.

--

From afar, the Rodian and Twilek watched through macrobinoculars as their target left her home with her joined up with the rest of the clones.

“How is she out and about?” The rodian remarked in astonishment.

The twilek sighed in aggravation. “Remember what the boss said, she’s a fighter and she’s strong. You clearly got the dose wrong. She’s able to be out here cause she had to have thrown it all up.”

“But the boss also wants her alive, I gave the amount I was sure would leave her vulnerable but wouldn’t kill her.”

“Well, we can’t take her whilst she’s surrounded by that group anyway, and even if we get her alone, she needs to be fully incapacitated for us to even have a shot...”

“What are you saying?” The rodian asked nervously. He’d never been as sure or as excited about this job as his twilek partner was, but the money was too good to pass up. But there was a new kind of sociopathic gleam in the twilek’s eyes that unnerved him.

“I’m saying we up the dose until her body can’t fight it.” Life here was slow and the satisfaction he’d glean from watching you and the people around you hopelessly attempt to figure out and fight what was wrong with you was an opportunity too tempting to ignore.

To the rodian, that sounded awfully risky. Both for them and their target. This stuff was extremely lethal even in a small amount. Plus, the longer they lingered, the higher the chance that they’d be discovered. And he knew his poisons- this one was one of his own inventions too- which was how he also knew it was particularly volatile when given in large quantities. The build-up of symptoms was designed to make the recipient so agonised and weakened that they’d wish for a death that would never arrive but that was when administered at regular intervals of the same low quantity– death didn’t have to be the end result, the torture was what one would buy this poison for. But, if they went with this strategy, every deadly symptom would hit you all at once and he knew you’d never survive that which wasn’t useful to their specific remit. However, the twilek had been put in charge and he wasn’t someone he wanted to be on the bad side of. “The boss won’t be happy…”

The twilek dismissed that without skipping a beat, “So, we won’t tell her yet. We just need to get the Jedi to the boss alive for the premium cut of the deal. After that, who the hell cares how she ends up.”  His voice wavered in an attempt to stay level-headed with the rodian. This whole poisoning method was so tiresome- he much preferred a straight fight- but they’d been warned off that with this whole squad. Hence why he was stuck with this jittery rodian who had gotten into this line of work through offering his services and using his skills as an apothecary for what sensitive people would deem immoral uses and gains. But even he had to admit, a Jedi was easier to apprehend if they couldn’t fight back and everyone here was so stupidly trusting, it made getting access to you almost too easy. The trickiest and most time-consuming part would be getting you alone but from their brief, he knew that time would arrive sooner or later, he just needed to be patient.

--

3 weeks later

You finished dry-heaving and risked a glance in the mirror above the sink as you slowly went upright as it became clear nothing was coming up. You regretted that decision immediately.

You barely recognised the person staring back at you.

Your clothes stuck to you uncomfortably. The fever was a new addition as of last week and your hair was slick with sweat, and you wiped away the drops slowly sliding down your temples.

Your face was sunken and devoid of all life.

Dark circles were under your eyes, so dark that they could’ve been mistaken for bruises. There was no light behind them at all, no sign of that lively spark that had once been a constant part of you.

It was as if all your fire and vibrancy had evaporated.

You looked like a shell of a human being.

To top it all off, you noticed spots of blood at the corners of your mouth and in the saliva that you’d hacked up, but you put that down to the strain your throat had been put through. Cleaning up, you took one last strengthening breath but even that was proving to be more effort than you’d expected. You then heard a quiet knock on the other side of the door

You opened the refresher door to see Hunter standing waiting with his now standard worried expression on his face and your flask of water. He’d stopped offering you food in the early stages when it became clear you couldn’t hold it down and even water appeared to be a struggle.

You rejoined the group of people in the living room who were all here to supposedly help you plan the ceremony but all you got was the sea of nervous and concerned expressions from your squad- and that included Echo who had planned to leave once you were feeling better, but that day was yet to arrive- and Dalia. “I’m fine.” You exhaled wearily as you sat down. You thought just flinging yourself into what should’ve been a good distraction would aid in your recovery but, aside from the reduction in vomiting, things weren’t looking that much improved. In fact, you’d probably admit they’d gotten worse. You realised there were two faces missing. “Where are Shep and Lyra?” You asked, your voice strained and hoarse. You rubbed your arms because, despite the humid day, you felt goosebumps rise on your skin.

Wrecker placed a blanket around your shoulders.

“They didn’t think discussing flower arrangements was a smart use of your energy.” Crosshair remarked in a clipped tone, but it came from a place of care. He, like the rest of them, was growing more and more disturbed as your condition continued to deplete.

You lacked the gumption to argue with him so instead you just nodded in acknowledgement that you’d heard him.

Hunter noted you still hadn’t drunk from the water he’d handed you. He tapped the cup to prompt you to do so. “If you would just lie down...”

You did it for him but even water tasted wrong as it went down your throat and it really didn’t sit well. “Remember that stubbornness you love?” You said through a grimace. Plus, sleep pretty much eluded you these days.

“This is one of those times where it drives me crazy.” Hunter muttered fretfully.

“If I just sit around, I’ll go insane. I-” You lost energy halfway through your attempted to explain your reasoning. Instead, you readied yourself for the medical questions from Tech and Dalia- the town healer- that were sure to come your way now.

“Your fever is getting worse.” Tech observed as he took your vitals.

“Bacta won’t do you any good anymore. You’re just burning it off.” Dalia said as she confirmed Tech’s words.

“And I checked with AZ, his recent round of tests came up with nothing.” Omega said defeatedly, patting Batcher in an attempt to quell her worries.

“So, what else can you do?” Hunter asked Dalia and Tech anxiously. It really felt like they were running out of options. He saw you hunch over in pain, and he didn’t need to touch you to feel the heat radiating off you. He instinctively reached out to offer you some semblance of physical comfort, but he knew that hurt you now, so he stopped himself.

Tech started first, “We can test for-”

You straightened up and once the room stopped spinning, put on a brave face. “Look, we ruled everything out. It’s just stress, Tech. Besides, I’m not even throwing up anymore, it’s just dry heaving so that’s progress.” You said, attempting for levity but you were too exhausted to convey it.

“I’ve seen you stressed; your symptoms were not of this format nor this severe.”

“So, it’s a different type of stress.” You said tiredly as you forced yourself to stay upright.

“And your pain?” Dalia asked as she took examined you as best she could in this particular circumstance. Your medical case was infuriating, one because she liked you and hated seeing you in this state, and two, because she hated not knowing how to help you. Everything she had attempted had proven useless. She knew your ailments but had no idea what was causing them. Your pain wasn’t localised, and no pain killers were working. All she knew for sure was that you were incredibly dehydrated and sleep-deprived, your entire body ached, you couldn’t stomach anything, and you had a fever that was reaching near dangerous levels. How you still functioning had to be due to your special abilities, but it was also a testament to your sheer strength and force of will.

The pain was getting harder and harder to ignore. “Well…” You nervously fidgeted with your ring.

“It’s worse?” Dalia and Hunter said together in the same troubled tone.

“Let’s just say the sedatives you’ve given me to sleep are losing their effectiveness.” You mumbled.

“I can give you a stronger dose.” Dalia offered. It wasn’t a suggestion she liked giving but she was running out of ideas.

“I’m not spending my time half awake and barely alive.” The irony of the comment given your present condition was not lost on you though. “I still get a few hours with what you’ve already provided. It’ll do.” Although, saying you got even a few hours was also a generous statement.  

“You can’t be serious.” Echo couldn’t help but protest, voice rising in concern. “A few hours aren’t enough to-”

“Echo…” Hunter warned. He’d already gone down this path with you and it was something you’d never budge on.

Dalia heaved a sigh as she finished up and took a fresh blood sample for comparison to previous ones. She readied to leave. “Look, me being here throwing useless suggestions your way isn’t helping either. Best I can advise is slow down. I’m going to run through your labs again.” With that, Dalia got to her feet and headed for the door.

“Thanks for coming by.” You said to her, your voice heavy with effort it took to sound somewhat normal.

“For the record, that was not convincing.” Crosshair told you as he took your water canteen to refill it since Hunter was seeing Dalia out. “Why didn’t you take the damn sedatives?”

“If Hunter can’t even get me to do that, what makes you think you can?” You pointed out as you curled in on yourself. You also knew they truly wouldn’t make a difference.

You were growing more and more aware of the reality of your situation, and it wasn’t anything that could be prevented.

--

Hunter caught Dalia’s arm just before she exited. “Dalia, she physically can’t go on like this for much longer. And it’s not just because she’s refusing to ease up. There are days where I can convince her to just stay in bed, but it’s not helping.” He whispered, doing his best to keep his voice level as his worries threatened to overcome him.

“Hunter, I’m sorry. I’m looking into everything, I promise.” Dalia said in a quiet voice. “Tech and I even checked for poisons, but nothing came up. But I’m not going to stop, I swear it.”

Hunter sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I know, Dalia. Thank you.” Hunter said sincerely before he shut the door and took a calming breath as he turned around and filled him with both sadness but gratitude. All of them were doing what they could do support you.

He watched as Wrecker and Omega delicately fussed with your blanket, Tech continued to study furiously on his datapad for anything that might correlate to what was causing your illness, and even Crosshair was making sure you were drinking water regularly. But then, he saw that recognisable look in your eyes, and he saw Echo help you to your feet before you staggered to the refresher, and he exhaled shakily as he got control over his own deep anxieties over your condition.

He followed you to the refresher again, ignoring the fretful looks his family were sending both his and each other’s way.

--

You hadn’t managed to lock him out this time, so he was able to enter, shut the door and collect the hair falling forward around your face. Every miserable effort your body put you through in an attempt to rid you of whatever it was that was causing this sickness only exacerbated the strain on your worn out and frail form. He kept trying to not fixate on it because they were all working on figuring this out and he had to believe that someone would find something… because he knew you were running out of time.

You finished up and exhaled a shuddering breath, “It hurts, Hunter. Everything just hurts.” You admitted, your voice racked with agony. You only wanted it to stop. You needed it to stop.

Hunter’s chest tightened. “We’re going to find out what this is.” He promised. He reached for you but hesitated.

The need to be held by him overpowered the subsequent discomfort and you folded into his embrace and let the silent defeated tears finally fall.

--

“I really hate this, you know.” Hunter griped worriedly as he got ready to leave you at the door and spend the night with his brother’s and Omega. Somehow him saying you needed to get to sleep had turned into you sleeping here by yourself. Despite the fact that they’d all wanted to spend the night here; you’d gotten them to agree to leave you alone. How you’d managed to do that, he had absolutely no idea.

You knew he did but with all your tossing and turning in your feverish delirium, he wasn’t getting much rest either and you hated that more than you hated your own sickness. You raised your hand, your arm feeling unnaturally heavy, and placed it on his chest to quell his fears but even that simple action sent a sharp pain through your limbs.

Hunter noticed your efforts to conceal your discomfort and what you’d said in the refresher was still plaguing his head. How could you expect him to leave you like this. “Please let me stay, I really don’t mind-”

“Hunter, you haven’t had a solid night’s sleep since the night of the party. There’s no sense in us both suffering here.” You just about managed to give him a smile of reassurance. “It’s just one night and you’re only a few houses down. If I need anything, I’ll get you on the comm, I promise.”

“I won’t sleep any better away from you. I-”

“But here you have no choice. I need to know you at least had the option.” You insisted as you fought against the urge to slump into his arms. Your entire body felt like lead.

“But-”

“I’ll see you in the morning.” You said with finality before your voice softened. “I’m only asking you do this for one night. Just one night where I don’t have to worry about you.”

“Worry about me?” Hunter repeated with combined fondness and exasperation. At least that sounded more like you. “Sweetheart, the only person that anyone needs to worry about is you and that should include you.”

“What if I promise to spend all my time tonight worrying only about myself?” You offered, a hint of your old spark coming through before it was squashed by another bout of pain settling in your muscles. Your jaw clenched in an attempt to keep your groan contained. You thumb fiddled with your ring in an attempt to distract yourself.

Hunter picked up on that too but not wanting to put you under the strain of further deliberation, released a long, drawn-out breath and managed a stiff and reluctant nod of consent to this idea.

“Thank you.” You whispered. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Hunter replied as he caressed your fingertips with his own. It was the closest to an affection gesture that he could offer you now.

“Batcher is going to stay with you.” Omega said with a slightly nervous smile as she patted the hound farewell. “Just in case.” She knelt down in front of the dog and stroked the underside of her chin. “Look after her, Batcher.”

Batcher gave her an affirmative bark in reply before she came and sat by your side.

“Thanks kid.” You waved as she and the others departed but Hunter still lingered. “Go.” You ordered with a half-smile.

With one final look in your direction, Hunter finally forced himself to leave.

You shut the door and braced your forehead against it as a fresh wave of dizziness and pain coursed through your body. You felt a wet nose nuzzle against your hand with a quiet whine. You opened your eyes to see Batcher looking up at you with an intense, concerned stare. “I’m alright, girl.” You winced as you pushed yourself away. You were employing the strategy that if you told yourself that enough times, maybe one day it would prove to be true.

You debated the effort of going all the way to your bed, but your body gave up halfway there, so you decided on the convenience of the couch, Batcher curled up on the floor beside you.

--

Hours had passed. You weren’t sleeping but you were working on attempting to trick your body into thinking it could by keeping your eyes shut.

The sound of barking caused you to finally give up and open them which you did, and you were greeted by the sight of Batcher snarling at the dark shape looming over you and watched as it reacted quickly to the attacking hound and the stun blast took Batcher out before she had the chance to inflict any damage.

To say you reacted sluggishly would be an understatement. You could barely will your body to move out of the way of the threat. Your eyes finally quickly adjusted, you realised it was a male twilek and he was currently sticking a need filled with a clear liquid into your thigh.

You finally slapped his hand away but not before the needle pierced your skin.

You shot to your feet, stumbling slightly as you recovered from the head rush that hit you as a result.

You immediately felt faint.

A fresh wave of intense pain tore its way through your body and the nausea and overall weakness that overwhelmed you was scarily familiar.

It was then you realised what he’d just infected you with was in fact the source your sickness. But what you couldn’t understand was how it didn’t show up on any of the scans and tests you’d undertaken. Even though at the time you’d thought it rather unnecessary, you had been checked multiple times for poisons in your blood, yet this got missed and that was deeply concerning in its own right.

The other concern was, judging by how feeble and breathless you became, this was finally the one that your body couldn’t fight against, and you didn’t know how much longer you could hold out. If you could just get to your comm…

“You’ve got a very protective group. I thought they’d never leave. Thank you for finally sending them away.” The twilek said, utterly unphased by being discovered. He stalked around the couch and placed himself between you and the front door.  

“How did you get-” You then remembered the open window in your bedroom.

“It’s funny how little people care about the security of their homes and personal effects here. You were basically inviting all of this.” He twirled his blaster with arrogant nonchalance. He saw the way you were clutching your side like you could brace yourself against the pain coursing through your veins and your knees buckled but you caught yourself against the coffee table the move seeing the cup of water fall to the ground, cracking with the impact. “Now, let me see, I’ve been hearing enough about how this poison works to remember some of the effects. Let me guess…” He tapped the tip of his blaster against his chin as he listed them off as you pitifully worked on getting to your feet, “Constant nausea, insomnia, fever, dizzy spells and extreme bodily pain. None of which standard medical can defeat. I’m sure I missed some but those are definitely the highlights. Does that sound about right?”  He taunted.

You forced yourself to stand tall. Your eyes darted to your comm link on the kitchen counter.

“I wouldn’t…” The twilek warned in irritation as he stalked towards you.

You didn’t listen. You channelled whatever energy you had left and landed kick to his stomach- the action causing you more pain than it did him- and made a dash towards it.

Just as you grabbed it, you felt a brutally take hold of the back of your neck and smack your head against the edge of the counter. Blood poured from the fresh cut on your forehead, and you collapsed to the floor with a pained cry and cups and plates came smashing to the ground around you.

You shook away the black spots encroaching on your vision and attempted to crawl along the floor to your discarded comm device, sharp pieces of debris cutting into your palms, your body screaming in agony with the effort.

“I gotta give you credit.” He picked at his cuticles. “You lasted longer than I thought you would but I’m sick of this place so if you don’t mind, I’m going to speed this along.”

You felt a knee on your back and the butt of a blaster smack against your temple, turning your world black.

--

“Did you have to beat her like that? The poison has clearly been working. One stun blast and she’d be done.” The rodian chastised as he saw the twilek unceremoniously dump your freshly bruised body on the floor of the ship. He swivelled in the pilot’s chair and turned the ship on.

“The bitch still put up a fight. Besides, you had your fun with your little concoction. I needed mine. Now, hold on, we’re not leaving just yet.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Give me two minutes.” With that, the twilek took off the engagement ring and departed the ship.

“You didn’t use that final vial, did you?” The rodian called after him but he got no answer.

--

The following morning

Hunter roused from his restless slumber. It had been a mildly better night but not one he’d be looking to repeat.

He tidied his section of the floor he’d been given- it was a tight squeeze with all six of them here- and put away his sleep mat and spoke to his family who were all gathered in the kitchen, nursing cups of caf. “I’m heading back to check on her.”

“We’ll join you momentarily.” Tech said, his sights fixed firmly on his datapad.

Hunter nodded but as he opened the door, his blood ran cold as he saw what was on the doorstep. He kneeled down to pick it up and a new type of panic sat heavy in his chest.

“Hunter?” Echo had been the one to call over, but they’d all noticed the change in his posture.

Hunter’s head snapped in the direction of the sound of frantic, worried barks and he saw Batcher come sprinting around the corner. He started running, the rest of his squad following close behind.

--

The front room set the scene for Hunter in brief yet terrifying detail.

The floor was a mess of broken glass and smears of blood.

Your comm lay abandoned on the ground.

And you were nowhere to be found.

Hunter couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t best the tightening in his chest and the fear taking root in his heart. All he could hear was a high-pitched droning in his ears and it took everything in him not to succumb to the terror he was experiencing as he realised you had been taken from him. Again.  

Around him, his brothers already started analysing the scene.

“The Empire-” Wrecker began to ask.

“Rex and I have been monitoring them and they have no idea where any of you are. This isn’t them.” Echo disagreed.

“It’s not their style either.” Crosshair stated.

“It is highly possible that a bounty hunter infiltrated this place in. Technically, I believe the price on her head would still stand.” Tech theorised.

“But who would know where we are?” Omega asked him.

“It would be best to consider past interactions and any new people you came across post Eriadu as well as those we already know who can tie us here. Now, naturally that should include Phee and Lyra. They may have accidentally-”

“Tech, no one on this island would ever give her or any of you up.” Echo argued.

Frustrations between all of them started to rise. They were going in circles and they knew your condition only made things that much more urgent.

“I’m very well aware of that fact but the truth is we need to think practically here. Someone knows where we are, and that knowledge has been used against us. Someone with enough skills to what I assume is poison her enough to take her out, and to elude all of us and take advantage of the very foundations of this place. Surely, there is someone that fits that profile.”

“There are too many.” Crosshair countered.

“There’s not way of knowing for sure.” Wrecker agreed with Crosshair. “And she needs us now.”

“Well, we need to start somewhere.” Tech said logically though he had to make an active effort to keep his own anxieties in check.

Meanwhile, Hunter carefully held your engagement ring and remembered the happiness and hope it was supposed to represent. How was that a little over a month ago, there had been so much excitement and joy in his life, and it had been so quickly overturned by pain and suffering. This was supposed to be a new life, a new beginning. You were supposed to be safe here, the threat of Hemlock and the Empire was over. Yet somehow, the past had come back to inflict more damage. Who could possibly have anything to gain from claiming that bounty? Who did they know that was that heartless, that calculated but would use a method so cowardly. And most importantly, knew they were here. Who could’ve- Hunter snapped out of it and pocketed your ring. He interrupted the steady stream of voices, “It’s Cid.”

All of them looked at him in bewilderment as he said that name.

“The Trandoshan from Ord Mantell?” Crosshair double checked since he’d never actually met her, he only knew the name through stories, but he knew that her name had nothing positive to go with it.

Hunter nodded.

“How do you know?” Wrecker asked.

“Because everyone else wouldn’t do this.”

“But wouldn’t we be aware of her presence here?” Tech pointed out.

“Lyra wouldn’t sell us out and neither would Phee. But there’s another link between us and Phee, and that’s Cid. You’re talking about bounty hunters, and we know she doesn’t do her own dirty work. It was her who told, same way she was the one that told the Empire we were here, and now she’s doing it again.” Hunter said, his voice eerily calm. “Tech, how much of the party did you record?”

“All of it.” Tech responded and, already anticipating Hunter’s next question, he pulled up the footage.

All of the gathered round as Tech brought up the recording of the party, increasing the playback speed as the evening unfolded.

Hunter, swallowing harshly as he made himself ignore all the tender moments with you that made that evening feel so perfect, anxiously scanned the flashing scenes in front of his eyes, looking for that first instance where you got infected and where this plan all started. “There!”

Tech paused the video feed.

“Dammit.” Hunter clenched his hands into fists. How had he missed that? How had he let you down that badly? “Dammit.” He hissed again under his breath before he departed and made for Shep’s.

“What did we miss?” Echo asked as the rest of them as they all stared at the frozen image of the rodian with the drink.

There was silence for a few minutes as they all peered at the screen.

Tech inhaled sharply as he next spotted the subtle difference. “The white powder…”

They all ran after their brother.

--

Shep heard an insistent pounding on his door and opened it to see Hunter standing there, breathing hard and there was a panic behind his eyes that he couldn’t hide and to Shep, that only meant one thing. “Is she-”

Hunter wasn’t even going to let him finish that thought. “The rodian from the engagement party. Who is he?” He questioned sharply.

“The rodian?” Shep repeated in confusion. This was the last thing he expected to hear.

“The rodian at the party.” Hunter repeated hurriedly. “He gave us our drink once we got back from the beach. He had yellow skin, quiet demeanour. He was new to the island; I didn’t recognise him.”

Shep recovered quickly. “Yes, yes.” He recalled the one Hunter was referring to. “He arrived with a twilek. They were quiet, mostly kept to themselves.”

“Were?” Hunter repeated and he felt his squad approach from behind.

Shep pointed down the road, “I checked on the temporary housing we provided them to see how they were feeling about the move, but they are no longer there. What does this-” Shep was only met with the sights on all of them racing for that house.

--

Hunter took in the front room. From the clothes left behind and the general disarray in the living space, it was obvious that they’d left in a hurry. He then noticed a puck for long range communications had also been forgotten about and that was the first time he felt a flicker of hope. “Tech.”

“I’m on it.” Tech confirmed as he began working on hacking into the system to trace where the communications went.

Hunter and the others continued to search the house and that was when Hunter spotted an old wanted poster of you nailed to the wall with a knife through your face. Hunter tore it down and curled one into a tight ball in a flash of rage before he composed himself continued searching the area for any sign of where they’d gone.

“Hunter.” Omega called over as she opened a cabinet just above the sink.

Hunter walked over to where the young girl was and took in what she had found.

There was a vast array of discarded and empty vials inside the cupboard which were accompanied by a series of instructions for powder ingestion or liquid injection. Underneath the untidy scrawl, was also a list of symptoms that would accompany each dosage but what caused the fear he was working on supressing to spike was that it seemed to be that their plan had consisted of giving you the second-most lethal one.

But there was no name of the mixture, no list of ingredients to go off of or any signs of a cure. It only served to confirm that what you had been experiencing was a cruel, carefully maintained poisoning.

“I’ve got the location.” Tech announced as he brought up the coordinates to Asusto.

Hunter memorised the number and he knew he’d be able to track you once he landed. Next, he barked out orders like he’d done for most of his life. “Tech, you start getting what you can from these instructions. You thought it was a poison before, do what you can to narrow the list down. Omega, you help him. I’ll confirm what they did once I find them and get the antidote. The rest of you, help Dalia get ready for our return.” With that order, he turned on his heels and ran for home.

--

He entered the bedroom and started preparations to leave all the while doing his best to not let each reminder of you in here to distract him. You needed him focused, not frantic with worry. He reached under the bed and pulled out the case of depleted armour that he’d never thought he’d have to put on again. It wasn’t even a complete set anymore, and it was still scratched and worn down, but it had to do. He grabbed his blaster and vibroblade and got ready to leave.

As he left, he saw that Wrecker, Echo and Crosshair had returned and were all stood there, blasters in hand and in whatever armour they’d had post Tantiss. “No.” He said immediately.

“Dalia can handle setting up herself. You’re not doing this alone. You need us as backup.” Echo reasoned.

“I can’t ask that of you.” Hunter said with a firm shake of his head. This was supposed to be behind them, he wouldn’t inflict this another fight on them.

“You’re not asking, and neither are we. We’re going with you.” Crosshair said definitively.

“Yeah, you mess with one of us, you get all of us!” Wrecker said in agreement.

“I already told Rex and he ordered me to stay here. You’re not doing this alone.” Echo added. “My ship is ready whenever you are.”

Hunter dipped his head in thanks before he led the way out.

--

Your head was pounding.

The cuts on your palms stung.

Everything around you sounded fuzzy- it almost sounded like you were underwater- and from what your semi-conscious self could tell, you appeared to be in some sort of basement. You weren’t cuffed or chained but that was probably because your captors realised you were hardly able to keep your eyes open, let alone plan an attack to get out of here. You could make out their blurry shapes just ahead of you, and you strained to hear why the rodian was in such a state. As you did so, you felt something wet dripping down your face, and you guess the damp basement had a leak somewhere.

“Shitshitshit, this is why I told you not to give her that last dosage!” The rodian cried in a frantic panic.

You felt a coarse fabric scrape under your nose, and you saw the crimson stain of blood as it was pulled away… so, clearly, it wasn’t a leaky roof. You had no doubt that signified the end for you- it was now only a matter of when- but your current disjointed thought process had you worrying more about the fact that the comforting presence of the ring on your left hand was no longer there.

“You wanted her to be an easy grab, I made sure of it.”

“I don’t have an antidote prepared!

“So, make one.” The twilek said with no concern whatsoever.

“With what ingredients? This was never the plan!”

“She’ll be dead before we even leave this room and if the boss doesn’t kill us, the client sure as fuck will!”

“She was as good as dead anyway; I only sped it along.”

“You-”

“How long?” You croaked, interrupting their argument.

The twilek ignored you but the rodian, wringing his hands anxiously, said, “About two hours.”

“Ah.” You said plainly. “Guess you mistimed that one huh?” You winced as you curled into the fetal position as if it could ease the agony coursing through every fibre in your body.

“Just keep your mouth shut.” The twilek ordered as the both of you as they waited for their boss to show up.

--

You had been in and out of consciousness but came around to the sound of the rodian babbling to himself about how everything had gone to shit, and they were seconds away from getting killed. You clued in to the sounds of a door opening and footsteps descending to the basement.

You feebly raised your head and you saw the face you wished you’d never see again. “You bitch. You fucking bitch.” You seethed weakly. The last bouts of your cognitive abilities put it together: Ord Mantell, the Empire on Pabu and now these bounty hunters being able to find you… it all fell into place. “Betraying us twice wasn’t enough for you?”

Cid didn’t let your words bother her. “Money is money and you’re worth a lot of money.”

You attempted to sit up but the best you could manage was propping yourself up on your forearms. “I hate to break it to you, but the person in the Empire who wanted me is very much dead.”

“Who said it was the Empire?” Cid said coolly.

A new type of panic set in but you were distracted by the warm, wet liquid sliding down your face and on to your lips, the iron tang of it burning your tongue.

Cid then noticed the blood steadily dripping from your nostrils. She whirled on the two goons she’d hired. “That’s not supposed to appear until the last stage, how much did you give her?!”

The rodian just glanced to the twilek.

The twilek shrugged. “Look, boss, you told us to use the poison however we saw fit. She needed a hell of a lot more of it in her system, why do you think we took so long?”

“She’s no good to me or the client if she’s dead!” Cid said angrily. “How long has she got?”

A beat of silence.

“About an hour.” The rodian informed her nervously.

Cid cursed under her breath. “We don’t meet the client until midnight!”

“Just push the meeting to now. Get her to the client alive and take the cash and get outta there.” The twilek suggested calmly.

“They’d know something was up. And we’d never get away with it with how she looks like now!”

“You try what they gave me and see how good you look at the end of it.” You muttered in offence, a new type of delirium taking hold of you.

Cid paid you no attention. “What about the antidote?” She asked the rodian sharply. “This is your poison; you must know how to counter it?”

“Aw Cid, I knew you still cared.” You said hoarsely, and everything around you started to move in and out of focus, each haggard breath leaving you acted like a sick form of countdown.

“The ingredients don’t exist here, and I never brought them. It wasn’t supposed to get to this point.” The rodian admitted.

Cid tossed her hands in the air, her own nerves steadily rising. “You idiots! This deal was for a fit Jedi slave, and you’ve given me someone that isn’t going to last the next hour! How-” Her tirade was cut short by the sound of an explosion above them, dust descending from the ceiling with the impact.

“Do you know the great thing about having a family?” You said with a cold laugh. You forced yourself to sit up. You may be fighting a losing battle but one thing you still knew was who the cause of that explosion. You’d sense them anywhere. “We look out for one another.” You glowered at the twilek, “That ‘protective bunch’ are about to become your living hell.”

The twilek only glared at you.

“If they’ve found us, it’s because you left a way for them to track our communications!” Cid said angrily.

“Don’t look at me, he’s the one who was responsible for packing up.” The twilek said dismissively, readying his blaster for the fight he’d finally been waiting for.

“Well, he was the one that taunted them with the ring!” The rodian said in a panic as the thudding of footsteps drew closer.

“Ring?” Cid repeated, her stomach dropping to her feet in fear. She glanced to your depleted form, and the realisation of just what precisely had developed between you and dark and broody since Ord Mantell cemented her fate. She’d royally messed this up.

“You guys are fucked.” You said dazedly as you slouched against the wall and more blood spilled from your nostrils, staining your hands and the ground below.

The door at the top of the basement stairs crashed open and smoke engulfed the room.

--

Three precise shots fired through the smoke.

Cid raised her arms in instant surrender as the smoke dissipated and she saw the state of her hired bounty hunters. The twilek’s blaster had been shot out his hands and he was bleeding from a shot to just below the abdomen whilst the rodian took a hit to his shoulder. Both of them were now sprawled on the floor. She muttered an uneasy curse as she realised what was in store for her.

The effort of breathing and opening your eyes after each blink got tougher to maintain but you recognised the familiar tender touch under your chin from the man in kneeling in front of you. “Hunter.” You said, your voice barely sounding above a whisper. Your eyes flickered open as you took him in.

Hunter wiped away the blood from your face, but it just kept coming, the sight of it heightening his persistent rising panic but he pushed it away. It wouldn’t help you if he let you see how ruined with worry, he was. “We’re getting you out of here, I promise.” He started to lift you to your feet, uttering soft words of comfort and reassurance as you went with him but each rasp and pained whimper from you only fuelled his anger further. “Hold on. Just hold on.” He begged you quietly.

“I’ve got her, Hunter.” Wrecker offered softly as he came to your side and took over. “Hang in there.” He said to you, his gruff voice choking up with emotion as he took your weight and saw the way your face was drained of all life, the blood standing out too brightly against your skin.

Hunter waited until Wrecker was properly supporting you before he turned on the three adversaries. He ignored Cid for the moment, he’d deal with her last. Right now, his priority was getting your cure and for that, he needed the two hunters.

He did a quick scan of the two males, the twilek was gritting his teeth against the pain and his face was a cruel mask of indifference but the rodian was a mewling mess and his heart was pounding so loudly, Hunter had heard it from upstairs which meant that the rodian was his way in.

“Tell me what you did to her.” His voice quiet with lethal softness as he stalked towards him.  

But the rodian said nothing.  

“Fine.” With that, he stabbed the rodian just above the knee and angled to tip of the blade towards his kneecap and pushed. He also clamped his other hand down on the open shoulder wound and paid no attention to the miserable screams that emitted from the rodian.

Crosshair and Wrecker made no move to stop it either. Wrecker kept you propped up while Crosshair kept his rifle trained on the twilek and Echo guarded Cid.

“Fuck! Oh fuck, no!” The rodian yelled as he writhed in an attempt to get away from the blade, but each movement only caused the blade to twist further into his joint.

“What did you do?” Hunter demanded again through the cries of pain. With both hands, he pressed harder.

The rodian spoke through the pain in a rapid, terrified manner, “I’ll tell you everything! I- shit, just don’t do that anymore! It’s called Ghost. I c- created it. We put the powder in her water flask and coated her pain pills in it and spiked her sedatives with the liquid form! It- ow fuck- it can’t be picked up on any medical scans and it’s got no taste or smell but it’s fatal when used excessively. Its main use is torture and incapacitation but for that, it needs to be used precisely. That’s all we wanted to do with her! I swear! But what I calculated for her didn’t work so we upped the dose, but it was too much too quickly. I don’t know how she’s still going.”

Wrecker, Crosshair and Echo had to fight to keep their expressions neutral, but that information shook them all to their core. They’d helped this plan along and the thought left them repulsed.

The horror Hunter felt at the fact that they’d all inadvertently been contributing to your declining health threatened to engulf him. He caught himself easing up on the rodian in the pure gut-wrenching shock of it all, but he gathered himself swiftly. “But there’s a cure.” Hunter insisted, angling his blade further towards the knee.

The rodian yelped in agony. “Yes, there’s- ah fuck- there’s- a- an- an antitode!”

“Shut up!” The twilek hissed command earning him a rifle butt to his face. His nose cracked and blood poured down.

“No way! This shit wasn’t what I signed up for!”

Hunter eased up on his pressure slightly to lure him into revealing more.

“Here, take it, take it.” The rodian winced as he reached into his inside vest pocket and took the piece of paper out- it had been the one critical piece of information he had the wits to remember to remove when they’d left the island- but now he wanted it as far away from him as possible. He felt momentarily relief as the man removed his vice-like grip on his shoulder but that was swiftly replaced by fear as he saw a blaster pointed at his face. “No, please don’t! I promise I won’t tell-”

Hunter killed the rodian with a shot to the forehead. “Get that to information to Tech.” He ordered Echo sharply who took the paper with a nod and swiftly left the room.

Hunter fired two shots into Cid’s knees as she attempted to slip away once Echo departed.

Cid crashed to the ground, hissing in pain.

Your slumped form addressed the other hunter who was still alive. “You two were slipping poison into my system for 3 weeks… didn’t you have anything better to do with your lives?”

“It worked, didn’t it?”

You, still delirious, mimed applause. “Yup, it did. Extra points for you. Although you’re 30 seconds away from death and I still have a good hour so who’s the real winner here?”

The twilek saw the tattooed solider stalking darkly towards him. He wasn’t going to die begging for his life like his rodian counterpart, he’d done something others could only dream of. “And you’re more than three hours away from Pabu. We beat you, you’re as good as-”

Hunter silenced his words with a single shot of his blaster.

You felt your legs completely give out with the effort it took to remain vertical.

Wrecker, unfortunately had to ignore your moans of since he was left with no choice but to strengthen the grip that he had on you. He didn’t even need to have Hunter’s enhanced senses to see how grave your situation was now. He could barely feel your breaths leaving your body and each time he wiped away the blood, more continued to pour down.

Hunter heard your weak cries of protest, and he turned his attention to the pathetic excuse of an individual crawling on her front away from him, blood streaking the floor from the wounds in her knees. No matter how much he wanted to make this hurt, you were the priority here. He caught up with her is a couple steps, stamped down on her back before he roughly turned her around and replaced his foot harshly on her chest.

Cid couldn’t run. She couldn’t fight. But she knew fine well what was in store for her. “Look, bandana, it was just a bad business deal, okay? I didn’t know they were doing to use so much. You’ve got the antidote, just take it and get her the help she needs.” She said tightly through the pain.

Her words filled him with pure disgust, and he couldn’t stand to hear them anymore. With her out of the picture, it would finally all be over. The constant threat of her wouldn’t plague them anymore.

“You betrayed us three times. You don’t get a fourth.” Hunter said, his voice steely with quiet and controlled rage.

“It wasn’t personal, it was a business deal. I’m sure-”

Hunter cut her off with a shot to her face. He holstered his blaster.

“Move out.” He directed as he came to your opposite side and aided Wrecker in keeping you upright so you wouldn’t choke on the blood gushing from your nose.

--

Wrecker passed you fully off to Hunter as you all entered the ship, and he joined his two other brothers in the cockpit.

Hunter laid you down carefully on the cot, angling your head so you wouldn’t gag on the blood continuing to flow from your nose. He held one cloth over your nose in what he knew was a futile attempt to stem the blood flow before he also grabbed a cold cloth and dabbed at your forehead. Your skin was on fire, your clothes soaked through with sweat and even blinking seemed to be a monumental effort for you. “Hold on. It’s just a little bit longer, okay?” Hunter told you, his voice quivering as he helplessly watched you. It seemed like even breathing was a burden for you now.

You couldn’t even nod. Another shallow breath shuddered through you.

--

Echo had gotten the ship into hyperspace and Tech back on comms. “Tech, we’re heading back. Did you get anything more on the poison?”

“Unfortunately, not more than what you’ve already told me given that it was not on any official record. But I read through what we uncovered in the home. One thing to be thankful for is that, if the instructions we’d already found are accurate, there’s still time. The final stage involved bleeding from bodily orifices. If-”

“She’s bleeding from her nose.” Crosshair interrupted.

Tech’s eyes flashed with alarm. “When did that start?” He asked, his voice grave.

“Can’t be certain but she was bleeding before we got there.” Echo told him, his own nerves rising as he saw Tech’s expression.

“Tech?” Wrecker prompted; he hated the prolonged silence as Tech glanced at his datapad. “What does that mean for her?”

“Omega and I have gathered most of what is needed for the antidote here, but we’re taking Phee’s ship to go to the neighbouring planet to get the final plants required.” Tech said instead.

“That’s not an answer.” Crosshair said, his voice tense.

“The answer wouldn’t do any of you any good. Just get her to Dalia the second you land. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

As he disappeared. Echo, Wrecker and Crosshair looked down the hallway to where Hunter was crouched by your side.

“We can’t have been too late, we can’t have been.” Wrecker fretted.

“She’s survived this long. She can do it.” Echo said but it was more to convince himself than anyone else.

“I don’t know how much she has left to give.” Crosshair said, his own worries seeping through as he watched your chest barely rise.

You were already living for longer than you were supposed to but none of them knew how much more of that you could sustain.

--

Hunter had heard the words from the cockpit, but he refused to let them resonate. “I’ve got it.” He said gently as he saw you attempting to take the rapidly growing blood-stained fabric off your face. He removed it, threw it away and made to grab a new one but your gravelly voice stopped him.

“H-Hu-Hunter.”

“Don’t- don’t try to talk.” Hunter advised, swallowing thickly. “Save your energy.”

You didn’t listen and just about managed to make your eyes focus on him. “I- I hav- have to tell you-” You gasped through pained breaths.

“Tell me when you’re better.” Hunter instructed, hoping he sounded like himself even as he felt his own distress rise in his chest, in his throat. He couldn’t stand this, but he needed to stay strong for you.

“I’m not-” You broke off with a sharp, hurt whimper. “I- I’m not getting better.” You could feel your body giving up with every ineffective, weighed down breath.

“Yes. You are.” Hunter took your hand and pressed your fingers to his lips.

“I-I want you- t-to-know that- that I love you.”

“Stop-” Hunter his voice growing hoarser and more wrecked with emotion with every passing second.

“I- I want you-you to move on- I want you to-to live.”

Hunter stroked hair back from your burning brow. “I can’t do that without you.” He whispered but he could from the distant look in your eyes tell that his words weren’t landing as the fever had ultimately taken its deadly grip.

“I- I would’ve married you.”

“You still will.” Hunter said as firmly as he could manage but it required pushing away more doubt than he cared to admit.

“I…” But you trailed off as you finally welcomed what you had been resisting for so long.

“Keep your eyes open. Please.” Hunter pleaded, his voice breaking as he saw you take one deep, crackling breath as you slowly blinked.

You wanted to. You wanted to so badly, but you felt like the end would be the only thing to give you any semblance of relief. Your eyes flickered shut and darkness took over.

Hunter hung his head and held your hand tightly, and he could only watch your signs of life slowly fade away. “Stay with me.” He begged your unconscious form through a strangled breath as he hoped some part of you would register his words.

Your pulse was thready at best, your breathing ragged and shallow.

Your entire body was shutting down and there was nothing Hunter could do to stop it.

--

Thanks to Tech’s efforts, Dalia’s home had extended and doubled into a well-functioning medical centre with enough beds and equipment to cope with whatever came her or the island’s way. It had felt a bit excessive, but it was better to be safe than sorry, and today, that was good thing.

“Put her here!” Dalia ordered as Echo slammed open the door for Hunter and Wrecker to hurry through, your body hanging weightlessly between their arms. “AZ, prep her and check her vitals.”

“Where’s Tech?” Hunter asked urgently as he placed you on the hospital bed.

“I don’t know. He should’ve been back by now.” Dalia said as she got a cooling blanket for you as AZ worked on stopping the bleeding before she gathered up the part of the cure that was already made up. She’d barely finished her sentence when Tech came sprinting through the door.

Tech stopped short when he saw the perilous state you were in but recovered quickly. He handed the final components over before he made to depart but stopped as he realised that his brother was making no move to do so.

“Hunter-” Tech tried to reach and take a hold of his arm, but Hunter shook him off.

Wrecker made to do the same but got the same result.  

“Hunter, you need to leave.” Dalia insisted as she busied about prepping the antidote whilst AZ continued doing what he could to stabilise you.

“I can’t.” He croaked; his voice barely audible as he stared at your practically lifeless body. He needed to know that you’d be okay, he couldn’t leave you like this.

“If you want her to live, you need to let me work and I can’t do that with you here.” Dalia said bluntly. She cared for all of them and hated seeing this happen but there wasn’t time to be gentle, you were barely hanging on and your health outweighed politeness.

Tech nodded to Wrecker to leave first before he turned his attention to his unmoving older brother. Tech understood Hunter’s reluctance and he too found himself not wanting to leave until he knew you were at least stable, but he was just about clear-headed enough to realise their presence was a hindrance. “Come on, Hunter.” Tech tried again and this time, Hunter let him take a hold of his upper arm to guide him out.

Hunter could barely move his feet- Tech was doing most of the work for him. He saw the concerned faces of his squad staring past him into the room but as he turned around to get one last look at you, the door shut.

The door shut on him but not before he heard it.

He heard the sound that was going to haunt him for the rest of his days. The low drone of the machine chilled his body to the bone and his knees collapsed out from under him. If it wasn’t for Wrecker’s firm grip on his shoulders, he would’ve just crumpled to the floor.  

Hunter wasn’t a medical expert, but he knew what a flatline sounded like.

--

What was complete devastation was soon replaced by raw, unbridled desperation. It swallowed him whole as he thrashed against Wrecker’s grip on him in his fight to re-enter that door.

“Hunter, stop, stop.” Omega managed to dart in front of him and take a hold of his hands. “You’ve done all you can. Fighting won’t help her or you.” She did her best to soothe him or at least get him to stop struggling against Wrecker’s hold.

The best Hunter could do was let her words and touch stop his insistence to get back to you, but he was practically hyperventilating. Cid had put them through a lot, but this had affected him in a different, more visceral way. The cruelty of everything she’d planned out and attempted to execute cut him to his core. “I did this.” He said in quiet horror and that admission opened the dam.

Once Hunter eased up, Wrecker released his hold, but he remained close by just in case. “This wasn’t your fault.”

Hunter lost all emotional control. “I should have stopped this!”

They’d all been anticipating this and knew Hunter needed them now. He’d kept it together for as long as he physically could but what they felt when they heard that flatline, he would be feeling ten times over.

“No, you couldn’t have. None of us knew what this was.” Tech reminded him.

Hunter’s panic and anger were leaving him unrestrained now. He couldn’t stop. “I watched her drink from that glass the night of the party, and I didn’t notice! I just watched it happen and did nothing! What good am I if my mutation can’t even protect the people around me!”

“It was impossible to trace. There was a reason your enhanced senses couldn’t detect this; it was inherently designed against them.” Tech emphasised.

He couldn’t handle the logic right now. It didn’t matter. All he knew was what had happened to get you here and what’d he’d failed to protect you from. “I was killing her, Tech! Every day I gave her that damn flask, forced her to take those injections and painkillers, I was killing her!”

“No. The poison was.” Echo interjected.

“Which I was only helping along! Cid might as well have hired me for the fucking job! She kept telling me that she didn’t want them but took them because she was doing it for me!”

“Hunter, you didn’t know.” Omega tried again but the clone only shook his head in harsh self-deprecating dismissal of her words.

“I should have! I-”

“And if you’re going to blame yourself for doing what you naturally thought was the only way to help her, then blame all of us because every single one of us did that.” Crosshair said bluntly but he was only speaking as frankly as he was because he knew his brother would never assign that blame to them and he needed Hunter to hear how ridiculous and pointless it was to put something like this on himself.

That felt like a punch to the gut, and it took the remaining fight out of him. But he welcomed it. The last thing he’d do would be and he could hear your voice in his head telling him to see the bigger picture here. “I know you’d never-” He broke off and tried again. “That wasn’t what I meant. I know it wasn’t your fault.”

“And it’s not yours.” Wrecker echoed again as he moved to now rest a solid, calming hand on his brother’s shoulder like he’d done in the months post the disaster of Ord Mantell.

Hunter took a deep, grounding breath, before he nodded to Wrecker to indicate that he wasn’t going to do anything foolish. He stayed standing whilst his family sat in the waiting area chairs.

Now, all they could do was wait.

--

Hunter was on step 864 when he ceased his nervous pacing a half second before the door finally opened.

The others all got out of their chairs once they “How is her condition?” Tech questioned the healer.

Dalia inhaled deeply. “She’s alive.”

Hunter couldn’t help but think there was a silent ‘for now’ that was in amongst Dalia’s tone. He’d been all too aware of what was happening behind that closed door. The announcement hardly brought him solace. There was only a slight easing to his churning stomach and frantic heartbeat as he waited for her to get to the crux of what she had to say.

“Can we see her?” Wrecker inquired.

Dalia hesitated before replying, “I would wait.”

“Why?” Crosshair asked warily.

“She flatlined three times but we got her back. However, she’s not awake yet.”

Hunter choked on a breath as she confirmed what he feared he’d heard again throughout the day.

“Not awake?” Echo repeated.  

“But she will wake up, right?” Omega asked anxiously. “You gave her the cure, so she’ll be okay, won’t she?”

Dalia slowly elaborated on what she meant, “It’s possible that with the toil the poison took on her and with the amount of strain on her body... well, I just don’t know if she’ll wake up. AZ and I going to monitor her for changes, but I’d suggest going home until you hear from me.”

“That’s not happening.” Hunter rasped, but there was no mistaking the intensity behind his words.

“Hunter-” Dalia started.

“We’re staying here.” Crosshair said, backing up Hunter’s statement with his brothers nodding their agreement too.

“I don’t know how long it’ll be before we know anything more.” Dalia said truthfully.

“We’ll wait.” Tech said firmly.

Seeing that she wasn’t going to change their minds, and she didn’t really expect to anyway, Dalia bowed her head. “Very well.” She said before she walked back into the room.

--

The hours ticked by painfully slowly.

Then the hours turned into the next day.

And the next.

Shep, Lyra and Phee had periodically come by both to check in and to bring food and blankets since it was obvious that none of them would leave until they knew your fate.

“Any updates, brown eyes?” Phee asked, laying a caring hand on Tech’s shoulder.

Tech rested his hand on top of hers. “It’s still touch and go.”

“And how’s he?” Lyra inquired with a nod in Hunter’s direction but all she got were a series of uneasy looks.

“As far as we’re aware, he hasn’t slept or eaten.” Echo said worriedly.

“Nothing? Can I bring something else? He should eat something.” Shep offered.

“We’ve tried. He won’t take anything.” Wrecker replied, voice rough with tiredness and emotion.

“I’ve got it.” Omega said as she came over and took two of the prepackaged meals.

--

“I brought you some food.” Omega said delicately as she approached Hunter who looked utterly exhausted.

“I’m not hungry.” Hunter said gruffly.

“Eat.” Omega ordered more insistently this time.

“Omega…” Hunter just shook his head.

“She’s going to make it. And you’ll need your strength to see her once she’s up. You know it’s true. So, eat.” She instructed again.

Hunter took the plate with a tired sigh and allowed the young girl to rest her head against his shoulder as the two of them ate and sat in the closest thing to relaxed silence he’d experienced since coming back.

--

Nightfall had arrived on the third day and there was still no word.

The others had all been in and out of restless naps as they waited.

The only thing keeping Hunter mildly calm was the young girl whose head was currently resting in his lap as she slept. Her soft, regular sleepy sighs allowed him some form of meditative relief as he sat there waiting for news. He adjusted the blanket as it slipped down her shoulders.

Another 15 minutes passed before Hunter heard signs of life making for the door. And his head snapped up as Dalia and AZ walked into the waiting area.

The rest of them instantly got to their feet.

Hunter gently roused Omega from his lap as they both stood, and he could hear his own anxious heartbeat in his ears.

Until now, AZ had been the one to give them sporadic updates. If Dalia was out here, that only meant one of two things…

“She’s awake.” Dalia said through a weary but delighted sigh.

Hunter braced his elbows against his knees. He covered his face with his hands and inhaled and exhaled shakily as he resisted the urge to release a relieved sob.

There was a collective breath realised as they all heard her say those words.

“Thank you, Dalia.” Hunter just about managed to say as the crushing weight of his stress and worries lifted from his shoulders, and he felt strangely disconnected from every other sensation in his body as he fully comprehended that you were safe… that you were alive.

“She’s asking for you.” Dalia said, squeezing his shoulder.

As Hunter steadily walked towards the door, some part of him felt like maybe this was all a cruel dream and he’d wake up back in that waiting area to find that you were gone. That thought soon vanished as he saw you gingerly sitting up in the hospital bed.

--

“Hey.” You said with a real but still weak and tired smile as you saw him standing there.  

A strangled yet elated noise left his lips as he heard you speak.

“Yeah, I know I don’t look too hot right now.” You said with faint tracings of humour. But as you fully took him in, you realised that wasn’t what you needed to do.  

He wasn’t ready for that yet. Everything to too fresh, too intense for him to let this become something to joke about. He caught sight of you old, bloodstained clothing and all the emotions he’d been suppressing came to a head. “I never should’ve left you.”

“You weren’t to know.” You said as you realised you didn’t need to put on that front you had been prepared to maintain. You allowed your voice to soften, and you relaxed further into the bed as you no longer felt the need to act like you could just jump out of the cot. “But you got me out and back here in time.”

“No, I didn’t.” Hunter said with self-directed frustration. “You died.”

Dalia had filled you in on what had happened, but you didn’t know the extent to which he’d been around for that but now your own tears threatened to spill from your eyes as you realised what he’d had to go through. You knew how you’d be if you’d been in his position and it was something you could hardly bare to imagine so, for him to have witnessed what he did, it was no wonder you could sense his fear tearing him apart. “Hunter-”

“It’s a rare thing for me to feel as helpless as I have these past weeks, especially on that ship departing Asusto. It was a new kind of terror. I’ve always known at least something to do, but I couldn’t do anything to help cure you. Taking care of Cid was the last thing I could do for you and for the safety of this family.” He inhaled shakily, “But then I had to watch the poison destroy you and I couldn’t do anything.” Tears were running down his face, but he didn’t care. “You knew you were going to die, you told me as much on the ship. You told me to live, to move on. I heard each flatline. I heard you get ripped away from me time and time again, and I couldn’t take it. Each time I thought you wouldn’t fight your way back, a part of me died out there and if Dalia had come out there to tell us you were gone, that part of me wouldn’t ever come back. I’d exist but I wouldn’t live. Don’t ask me to move on because I can’t, I love you with all I have. You’re the other half of me and if you are ever taken from me like that again, that half goes with you.” He finished with a breath that was half exhale, half sob.

You wiped away a few of your own tears at his words. “Come here.” You whispered as you reached for him- for your other half- and moved to the other side of the narrow cot. “And it’s not going to hurt me.” You added in reassurance since you knew that’s where his concerns would instantly go.

Hunter swallowed through the lump in his throat and finally moved towards you and shifted into the bed.

You kissed away the salty tears on his cheeks and rested his head on your chest. You felt a little pressure at the action, but it was nothing you couldn’t handle. “Hear that? I’m still here.”

Hunter closed his eyes as he listened to the thudding that emitted from your chest. It still wasn’t as strong as it usually was, but it was there, and it was steady and that’s what mattered.

You delicately stroked your hands through his hair as you rested there. You focused on his warmth, his weight on your chest, and you’d never felt more content. You felt your spark coming back with each breath and so long as he was still with you, everything else now would fall into place.

--

Upon hearing rising voices and footsteps, Hunter had just sat back down in the chair by your bedside, when Dalia re-entered with AZ whirring behind her.

“What the status?” You asked the healer as you also heard the faint sounds of protests behind the shut door.

“With you or the insistent group outside?”

You chuckled quietly, “Why don’t we start with me?”

“I want you to stay here for at least a week. We need to get you rehydrated and start reintroducing food into your system and I want to give you one more dose of the antidote to make sure all the poison is out of your body. Does that sound acceptable? Bearing in mind that I know how you are, but I will really only take one answer.”

You laughed at that, “Yes, that sounds good, Doc.”

“Now, there is a rather eager group of people out there and I don’t know how much longer they’re prepared to listen to me telling them not yet. Can-” She got cut off by the door opening.

“The answer was not very.” Echo said apologetically as they all entered.

“Oh, for goodness sake…” Dalia muttered.

“Five minutes?” You requested with delicate politeness.

“Okay, fine but I draw the line at the dog.” Dalia said with a roll of her eyes as Batcher went of her hind legs and placed her front paws on the bed by your feet.

Omega whistled and hustled Batcher out of the room before she rejoined her brothers.

“Five minutes.” Dalia reminded you as she and AZ made to give you privacy.

“Dalia, I don’t even know how to thank you. I-” You began to say as the healer walked away.

“Don’t waste your precious time now.” Dalia said but she bowed her head in acknowledgment of your words before she shut the door.

“And I also believe I owe you all a rather large thank you.” You said appreciatively.

“Don’t mention it.” Echo stated with a smile as he gave you a happy squeeze.

“Just don’t scare us like that again.” Wrecker implored as he took his turn.

“Trust me, that will not be something I am looking to re-experience.” You said agreeably.

“I should hope not.” Hunter muttered as he kept a tender yet secure hold of your free hand, his fingers finding a natural place resting on your pulse as a way to ground himself in this moment and remind himself that it was real.

Tech studied the screens next to you and tapped at his datapad. “Your condition has stabilised considerably. I would agree with Dalia’s recommendation for a course of-”

“Hey, no staring at my vitals or talking about my health until you give me hug.” You just about managed to hold your arm open expectantly but it was a rather pitiful attempt since you were still feeling pretty weak, but the resultant pathetic appearance probably aided your request.

“Very well.” Tech said through a sigh, but his brief embrace was heartfelt and warm.

“You know, if you wanted out of the engagement, there are easier ways to go about it.” Crosshair quipped as he came in last, but the relief was evident in his face.

“Ha ha.” You drawled sarcastically as you accepted his hug too.

“How are you feeling?” Omega asked and she placed her arms around you.

“Exhausted and still a little sore but alive which seems to be a bit of a surprise.” You said lightly.

“A bit?” Echo repeated with a shake of his head.

“Keeping you on your toes, Echo. That’s me.” You kidded.

There was a combined reaction of eyerolls and heads shaking in disbelief.

“And hey, we gotta find the silver-linings of this whole thing eventually. If you guys hadn’t left me that night, I wouldn’t have gotten the antidote. We’d never have figured it out.” You reminded them, absentmindedly stroking your thumb along the back of Hunter’s hand.

“I knew you were going to say that.” Hunter murmured, the tracings of a smile in his tone.

At that, you angled yourself to face Hunter once more. “I’m also really hoping you have something of mine?” You asked quietly as they all stood around the bottom of the bed.

Hunter kissed your forehead and finally allowed a proper smile as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the ring. “Do you want the speech again? Cause I have a few amendments.”

“Tell me tomorrow.” You said with a loving grin in his direction.

Hunter gently took your left-hand in his. “You know this is forever, right?” He murmured.

“I do.” You breathed in joyous relief as the ring slid back onto your finger.

Hunter pressed his forehead against yours in and nuzzled into the side of your face as he kissed your cheek.

All of you silently absorbed the moment that finally, finally your new lives could begin.

Next Oneshot>

Taglist: @noeasyisnoisy, @andreaaxy, @notgonnaedit, @moonychicky, @arctrooper69, @dizzy-9906 , @nightmonkeysstuff , @allthingsimagines , @thegreymarveljedi , @jellybeanstacey0519 , @callsign-denmark , @superbookishhufflepuff , @qvnthesia , @justsomerandompersonintheworld

[idkwhatever580]

More than you’ll ever know

[{pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader}]

{prompt- Natasha comes home from a long mission to find y/n curled up in her hoodie.}

(she/her pronouns I might use they/them in the mix as well. Just whatever I write lol)

[|warnings~ cursing probably. Tad bit of angst not a lot but lots of fluff|]

An; I actually hope this turns out good bc idk what to do if y’all hate it. It’s probably gonna be cringey but I live for that anyways sooo hope y’all enjoy!

————————————————————————————————————————

Nobody’s pov?

Natasha walks into her room and sets her duffel bag down on the floor with a sigh. She immediately looks around for her girlfriend and frowns.

“What the fuck?” She mumbles tiredly.

She takes a good look at her room and sees everything a mess. Trash and clothes everywhere. The sheets are a stray and the floor is covered in dirty laundry. Natasha huffs.

All she wanted was to come home from her week long mission to her girlfriend and the least she expected was a clean room.

She quickly realizes that y/n isn’t in their room and she decides to leave the cleaning for later and switches over to the task of finding her beloved.

She steps into the hallway and says “Friday? Where is y/n/n”

“Mrs. Y/n is in the third floor lounge room ma’am.” The ai quickly replies.

She mumbles a quick thank you and starts her trek to find her girlfriend.

Natasha steps in the elevator and Friday already knows where she wants to go so it starts moving. Natasha stretches her aching muscles a bit and the bell dings.

She steps out to find the lounge in a similar state as their room except for there is a mound of blankets on the couch. She smiles knowing that the amount of blankets y/n uses is unreasonable but cute.

She silently walks to y/n’s pile and slowly uncovers her one layer at a time.

Y/n’s Pov

I am sleeping in the lounge and I feel my blankets being torn away from me.

Okay maybe torn is a bit dramatic but hey I am the girl I’ve always been.

I quickly grab the hand that is above my face to stop them from touching me. Although my eyes are closed I grip their wrist tightly and say,

“If you so dare say one word I’ll have Natasha beat your ass when she gets home”

I hear a familiar chuckle and my eyes open widely and I see my girlfriend. I immediately jump over the edge of the couch into her arms and she says,

“Are you gonna make me beat myself up?”

I glare at her as I pull away from the embrace and then I look around and finally realize how bad it’s gotten.

Usually whenever Natasha leaves I can handle myself but sometimes my mental health gets worse and I find myself unable to get out of bed. So that’s where this has gotten me.

I look at Natasha and she has a concerned look on her face and she says,

“Детка, what’s all this?”

I suddenly break and tears start welling up. I feel awful for having her come home to a depressed mess like me. I quickly try to give her an explanation.

“I don’t know! I- I just stopped picking things up and then next thing I know it’s a whole depression room”

I hide myself in her neck and a few tears fall, but she comforts me and says,

“Oh, Детка, you always know you can ask anybody in the compound for help. Don’t just lock yourself up. Come on. Let’s go to our room and get you in a bath.”

I look down and nod my head. Instead of making me walk she carries me like a koala and I hang onto her tightly.

She gets a bath running and helps me in and then I say,

“You’re not getting in with me?”

She smiles and looks down at me and says,

“I’m gonna do something really quickly okay? I’ll be right back just relax.”

I pout but nod my head nevertheless knowing she probably has to go give some paperwork to Nick or something like that.

After about 10 minutes she comes back in and I smile at her.

“You’re such a cutie”

I say to her. She sits down on the toilet next to me and smiles and says,

“I’m the cutie?”

I nod my head and explain further,

“You’re so baby girl. Like. Just cutie pie.”

Natasha chuckles a bit. Oh god. How her laugh makes me blush. Even after two years of dating she never fails to give me butterflies.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been called cute before… most people would say that I’m quite the opposite.”

I pout at her words and quickly quip,

“Well then, I guess most people don’t know you and that’s literally so tragic because if I never met you I don’t know what I’d do.”

She smiles at me and says,

“Why don’t we get you out and let’s watch some movies?”

I hum and get out. She helps me dry off even though I protest she doesn’t let me do it myself, so I just let her do her own thing.

She gets me my favorite pjs and we go to the room and I freeze.

Everything is gone and cleaned. All the trash. All the clothes. I look to Natasha and say,

“Did you do this?”

She shrugs her shoulders and says,

“Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t.”

I roll my eyes and give her a kiss on the cheek. We get into the bed with fresh sheets on them and I immediately cuddle into her side. She goes for the remote and I shake my head and say,

“I just wanna lay here with you. No tv. No nothing. Just us”

She smiles and nods her head and says,

“I like that idea. I love you.”

I smile and kiss her softly. Deliberately avoiding saying ‘I love you’ back to her knowing it’s a pet peeve.

She pouts and I find it so cute and she says,

“Say I love you back.”

I look at her and say,

“Why?”

She fake gasps and says,

“You have to if you love me! Do you not love me?”

I shrug my shoulders and say,

“Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t.”

She pouts at me using her words against her and she says,

“You’re mean.”

I look at her and decide to be nice again so I say,

“And you’re the smartest, kindest, most loving, cutest, person on this earth. I love you so so much more than you’ll ever know.”

She blushes and smiles at me. I look at her and say,

“I’m sleepy”

Then as if on queue, a big yawn comes out from me, and Natasha giggles a bit. She snuggles closer to me if that’s even possible and says,

“Sleep baby. You’ll need your energy for tomorrow”

I groan when I remember that Natasha and I are training together. I’ve gotten out of training with everyone else this past week knowing they’d never make me do anything since Natasha romanoff is my girlfriend, but she won’t let it slide.

I decide to worry about it tomorrow and just focus on the fact that my baby is home and all is well in the world. Even if it isn’t.

——————————————————————————

An: I hope y’all like it! It’s a bit long but I couldn’t find a good place to finish it. And I wanted to add more lol. Please please please leave some constructive criticism for me lol. I need to work on my writing I’m sure. And feel free to leave requests anywhere :)))

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hopefully this doesn't come off as snarky, but I find it genuinely hilarious that every "big-name" Leona fan that I've seen seems to like him against their will lol. I've always had Leona as my favorite, so it's fun to see the journey other people go through to liking/appreciating him!

Look 💦 I can’t speak for other L*ona likers (regardless of size, honestly; I'm a firm believer that one's level of internet fame isn't a factor in the devotion for a character) but for me—to quote Scar—“my words are a matter of pride.” And by confessing to (ick 🤢) LIKING LION… it’s throwing all that pride out of a window. It seriously does feel like these feelings exist against my will.

I have a summary of my story to explain my relationship with the lion lore 💀 I call it a summary, but it’s still kind of long— It's below the cut for those who are interested!

To begin with, the promotional materials didn’t sell me on him. Everything about how he initially presents—from his arrogance to his “tough/bad boy” design (seriously, that biker-cowboy combo of his dorm uniform is SO ugly and shows way too much skin for my liking…)—was so unappealing to me. He seemed exactly like the kind of character and tropes I tend to dislike. The only “good” thing I saw in him was his face (which, ironically, is what Vil says about him) and maybe his UM chant particularly the line where he demands you kneel before him. Then comes along book 2, which is easily the weakest of the main story and does a HUGE disservice to him, making L*ona seem a lot stupider than he actually is. At that point, I had basically written his entire character off. I claimed to all my Twst friends that there was nothing that would ever make me like him.

Around 2022, I decided to get involved in a round of EBG (Epic Bias Game) which is basically like a test of your will?? You’re supposed to compete with your friends to see who can go for the longest without talking about or acknowledging their oshi (which includes not being able to react to fan works of them). As part of EBG, each participant was randomly assigned a “new oshi” to replace the usual one AND GUESS WHAT, I GOT HANDED L*ONA BY THE WHEEL OF FATE 💀

One of my friends (who knew I hardcore hated him at the time) assured me that this would get me to change my mind. They even went out of their way to write a little story explaining how my OC was forced to spend more time with L*ona, which led me into writing interactions between them to build more of the lore. I managed to outlast the friend in EBG, but didn’t win the entire game. I came out of it not really feeling super different about L*ona, but I think forcing myself to write about him extensively helped me gain a little more perspective on his character. I still didn’t like him, but I at least appreciated his presence in the cast a little more.

AND THEN TWST HAD TO COME AND BASH ME OVER THE HEAD WITH L*ONA CONTENT… All the little vignettes and voice lines where other characters would talk about what a good leader he is (*glares at Epel, Jack, Ruggie, Savanaclaw mobs, etc.*), when he sarcastically claims to be a “delicate prince” or a “lost child”, those moments where he sasses others, times when he’s able to use his charisma and/or intelligence to pull ahead, rare instances when he whips out his royal manners, him respecting women… But I think the turning point for me had to have been book 6 OTL GOOD LORD, BOOK 6 FUCKED ME UP 😭 Him using his UM in a creative way to turn falling glass shards into harmless sand? And strategically turning himself in?? Willingly ceding control of the dorm to Ruggie??? Telling everyone about Styx’s lore???? AND THE BEEF HE HAD WITH JAMIL BUT STILL GIVING HIM WISDOM AND ADVICE… Sometimes I still tear up thinking about how L*ona says “You’re not like me,” to Jamil 😔 implying that part of the reason why L*ona guides others is because he has hope in their futures but not his own… (I’m still salty that EN messed up this line by changing it to “I’m not like you,” which makes him come off as way more arrogant 💦) Anyway, I blame book 6 for being the tipping point in my downward spiral 🌀 IT GOT WORSE IN BOOK 7 WHEN HE STARTED SHOWING HE'S MOTIVATED TO ACTUALLY GRADUATE AND TAKES ON AN INTERNSHIP THAT COULD BENEFIT HIS COUNTRY... Special shoutout to the Club Wear card for being especially hot-- I did my best to hold out against the steady drip of content that called attention to his… positive traits… (Not that I’m saying he doesn’t have any; I mean this in that whenever his strengths as a character are brought up, they really get to me as someone who loves intelligent, mature/responsible types and “big brother” figures OTL) BUT IT'S SO HARD WHEN TWST KEEPS PULLING STUFF LIKE THAT???

Then in 2024 came the stupid Lost in the Book with Nightmare Before Christmas event 💀 which finally introduced us to L*ona in full formal attire (MY WEAKNESS) and gave him the opportunity to be in the role of the "hero" and leader... and those Nightmare Suit vignettes 😭 Leona thinking about what it actually means to be "king"... Ugh, it was another strong showing of his character. I'm pretty sure it was this event that started the snowball of my friends (lovingly) bullying me about him and calling me a tsundere about it. Weirdly enough, a BUNCH of things started happening irl to push L*ona at me too. For example, my pet (who usually actively avoids or attacks Twst stuff) was actually eager to pose for a picture with a L*ona standee. In a group fan merch order, I had asked for the bonus Grim sticker but the artist (who had no idea about my complicated thoughts on L*ona) said they were out of the Grim sticker but they had L*ona stickers they could include instead. Most recently, I had just finished this last-minute artwork of Miss Raven eating pocky by herself to celebrate Pocky Day (11/11). Typically the fan art you'd see on this day would involve two characters playing the "Pocky Game" (in which the players try to eat a stick of pocky from either end; usually it's framed as romantic since meeting in the middle results in a kiss). However, I had chosen to do a solo Miss Raven art because I thought this suited her "I want to be taken seriously!" personality better. Well, guess what? I GOT A PACKAGE DELIVERY NOTIFICATION FOR THE TWST MERCH ORDER... WITH L*ONA IN IT 💀 Almost like he heard there was food meant for sharing and he came to claim it for himself... Like I literally did NOT choose for these things to happen to me, THEY HAPPENED ON THEIR OWN. I DON'T BELIEVE IN PREORDAINED EVENTS BUT THE UNIVERSE SURE IS WORKING IN STRANGE WAYS.

So now that the tables have turned, it’s really embarrassing. Everything is coming back to bite me in the butt… It truly feels like L*ona plotted this all along and was on the prowl, patiently waiting for me to get worn down before he pounces and delivers the final blow to my ego OTL Like, it's gotten to the point where many of my long-time friends in the Twst community are now joking that "It's over" for J word... ONE OF THEM EVEN TOLD ME IT FEELS LIKE I'M GETTING DIVORCED AND L*ONA IS THEIR NEW STEPDAD, HOW AM I SUPPSOED TO FEEL ABOUT HTHAT ??????????? ? ? ????? ? ??? ? ?? ?? ? ???? ?

But by the far the worst, the WORST part about everything here is that if L*ona were fully sentient, he would be so smug about recent developments 😡 It makes me SO mad thinking about how he'd look down on me with that hot smug rage-inducing smirk of his and make fun of me for eating my words so badly.

“What was that you said about hating my guts, herbivore? … Hah, it's written all over your face--you're terrible at hiding your true feelings. You can just give in, you know. Tell me how much you worship me. How much you want me. You'll give in eventually one way or another--so why not make this easier for the both of us and save us the time of playing the wait game? I don't bite, promise." (<- a liar)

(Disclaimer: NOT MY MERCH; this is a L*ona Liker friend’s picture that they’re letting me use as a reaction image 😅)

THIS IS FR MY OVERBLOT ORIGIN STORY…

[shkudss]

Weakened by Eywa Pt. 2

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Masterlist

Summary: Ao'nung finally realizes that his actions have consequences

Warnings: curse words, bullying, mental breakdown, English isn't my first language

Author's note: tbh I didn't plan it to be longer than 2 parts, but now I think it'll be about 4-5 part (but I'm not sure lol). Anyways, I hope you will like it!

Yawntutsyip - darling, little loved one

Yaymak - foolish, ignorant

Yayo - bird

When Neytiri and Jake saw you in a complete mess on Neteyam’s hands, they thought something bad happened with you in the water.

Kiri and Lo’ak explained what happened without hiding any details. Neytiri was so furious that she was ready to take her bow and fight this little ignorant boy. She knew that he was annoying her kids, but didn’t expect it to be as bad as it turned out. On the other hand, there was Jake. He was furious too, he knew that his attitude towards all situations when Ao’nung annoyed his kids caused it. He shouldn’t have told his kids to respect him just because he’s Olo’eyktan’s son. That was his fault.

“Tonowari must know what his son did.” Neytiri was crying like any mother who sees her child in pain. Especially that type of pain which you cannot see. “Ma Jake, tell something! We can’t let that go. My daughter is hurt and only Eywa knows if she’ll be able to heal!”

Jake looked at her and all his kids, who were waiting for his response. Neteyam was still holding you like a baby while you were sleeping. His daughter, his little yayo. He has to protect you.

“I’ll talk to Tonowari.”

“I’ll go with you.” Neytiri wanted to talk to Ronal and say her all this she had to carry inside of her soul since they arrived here.

Jake didn’t want her to come, he knew that she was extremely emotional now. He gave her a look asking if he’s sure it’s the right thing. Neytiri was determined to do that.

“Wait here, take care of your sister.”

***

“I’ll talk to him and he’ll be punished for his actions. I’m really sorry for what happened. I didn’t raise him this way. I hope Y/N will forgive him one day.”

Toniwari and Ronal were in a huge shock when Jake told them what Ao’nung did. The shame Olo’eyktan and his Tsahik felt wasn’t even close to the amount of pain Jake and Neytiri had to carry.

“Don’t ever let him come to my daughter again! If I notice him even thinking about coming to her, I swear I will not control myself.”

“Neytiri...” Jake didn’t want relationship with leader’s family to worsen.

“She’s right. He should stay away from her. I don’t want him to hurt an innocent soul again. I promise, we’ll look after him.” Ronal knew how Neytiri must feel herself now. “I promise as mother to mother. If you need help, tell me.”

Neytiri just nodded, she was still not over her emotions. But she was thankful for this. Ronal was the only one who could understand her at least a little.

***

It’s been two weeks since your breakdown. These two weeks you’ve been taken care by your whole family and you barely walked out of your Marui. You felt like you were dried out. No emotions at all. Jake and Neytiri were extremely worried about your mental state. You barely talked to anyone, even Kiri, and preferred to do things on your own.

Neteyam didn’t even think about keeping your lessons on ilu riding. He tried to catch your interest on other things, but nothing caught your eye. Even Tuk tried to ask you questions to talk just a little. You had no energy to keep the conversation and pay proper attention to your little sister.

“Let’s go find some seashells?” Tuk didn’t give up on you.

“Tuk, I have no strength to do that. I’m tired.” You felt really bad every time you refused Tuk, but you couldn’t help it.

“Neteyam and Lo’ak are hunting, Kiri as usually disappeared. Mom and dad don’t let me do there alone. Please, I need you.” She started whimpering and shaking your hand.

“Okay, okay. But only for 30 minutes.”

“Thank you, I love you! Best sister ever!” Seeing Tuk jumping in happiness and saying those words warmed your heart. You smiled a little at the scene of here trying to find her little bag for seashells.

Once you went out of your house, you squinted because of the sunlight. These two weeks definitely affected you. The warmth of the sun and brightness of azure water reminds you of how you loved Pandora.

Tuk was holding your hand and trying to hurry you up to the shore. It became her hobby since you arrived here. Each in your family has at least one bracelet she made out of shells.

“I’ll sit here, you can go. Call me if you need help.” You were sitting exactly as that day with Kiri. The feeling of light waves surrounding you, calmed you a little. You were watching Tuk swimming and looking for colorful seashells. Sometimes she was distracted by some fish. As you were supervising little sister, you fell deep into thoughts and remembered that day. Sadness you felt all these days became more explicit.

You don’t know how to explain this sadness and why you feel it. You should be angry, offended, but not sad. Ao’nung said horrible things to you, but you’re not angry. Why?

“Oh Great Mother, help me. Let me come over this. I want to be happy again.” You whispered to yourself, feeling the tear falling to the water.

“Y/N…?”

Him.

You feel nervousness raising up in your body. Eywa must be testing you. You’re afraid to turn your head to Ao’nung.

“Please, don’t do this to me again. I can’t bear it anymore.” Your voice was trembling a little, but it was enough for him to understand your state. Especially, when he finally looked at you. Your eyes were like a glass, but without even a little sparkle.

He was standing about 2 meters away from you to keep distance.

“Y/N, I wanted…”

“What are you doing here?!” Lo’ak was furious, walking briskly towards him.

“Bruh, why are you always here.” You heard Ao’nung mumbling it annoyingly. You didn’t wasn’t really worried about what’s going to happen. Feels like you’re a doll without real emotions.

“You’ve been told you to stay away from Y/N. Are you that yaymak? Do you need us to punch you again to understand it?” Your brother came to him as close as possible and pointed at his chest aggressively. Lo’ak just like Neytiri was ready to fight him.

“I wanted to talk to her… normally.” Ao’nung raised his hands as a sign of peace and tried to stay as calm as possible. Even though his fists were itchy to punch him. “I won’t hurt her”.

“I don’t care. You’ve talked to her already and you see the result. It’s her first time outside since the past two weeks. Don’t make it worse.” Lo’ak lowered his voice so you won’t hear their conversation. You didn’t really care and turned back to keep watching after Tuk. She didn’t notice things happening on the beach, she was involved in her hobby. Her little bag was already full of shells, but she wanted to get more.

“Hey, you finally wanted to get some sun?” In a couple if minutes Lo’ak was sitting next to you. He wasn’t mad anymore.

“No, Tuk asked me to. All of you were too busy to accompany her in finding seashells. I didn’t want to let her down.” You smiled a little, watching your sister smiling as she find another colorful thing.

“But…” you noticed Lo’ak hesitating about something.

“What’s wrong?”

“Never mind. I’m glad you’re finally getting out of Marui. We are forest Na’vis, not Marui Na’vis.” He chuckled a little at his own joke and you couldn’t help but do it too.

Maybe, it’s not that bad.

Thank you, Great Mother.

***

Another two weeks passed. Since that day each member of your family tried to take you outside. Now you go out on your own just to think about your feelings. You are still trying to stay away from water and haven’t swam yet, but you’ve been exploring the little forest that’s actually pretty comfortable. It reminds you of home and you don’t have to hold your breath or ride ilu here.

You can be yourself.

Now you play with fan lizards and even laugh a little. It’s kind of meditation. Spending time in your environment, your home, helps your mental state. Jake says that you shouldn’t go deep into forest and you assure him that you won’t, but sometimes you loose the track of time and forget about your promise. What this happens, Neteyam is always first who goes to find you.

You feel unity with Eywa. It’s your secret, sacred place. You have a little pond here, some fruits growing on the trees and silence. This is your little world free from all worries, free from reality. You fulfill your energy here and nobody interrupts you peace.

You were sitting on the thick branch, involved in making a little bracelet from beads for Tuk. She gifted you a lot of bracelets and necklaces she made. You want to pay her back.

Suddenly your senses catch someone’s presence. Nobody is supposed to find you. It’s afternoon and none of your family should be trying to find you. Leaving all things, you silently stood up and tried to hide behind the tree as Neytiri taught you. You looked behind your shoulder to check who’s that, your knife is ready to serve you.

You heard stranger’s steps coming closer to the tree. You were getting ready to attack, no unnecessary thoughts were in your mind. Just as mom taught you. This is your place, your forest.

Another step and you catch this person, pushing them to a tree and putting a knife to their neck.

“Holy shit!”

You look up. Why is he here?

“Ao’nung? What are you doing here?”

All your strength disappeared the moment you realized who’s standing in front of you. Fear replaced it, slowly taking control over you.

You’re alone, with him.

“No, no, no, Y/N”

You walked back, still holding your knife firmly to protect yourself, but your hands were shaking which made things obvious. You’re just like a little animal who’s afraid but has nothing to do but protect yourself as you can.

“Don’t…”

“Y/N, I wanted to talk to you. Please, let me speak.”

You were afraid to trust him. Because his words hurt you. You’re afraid to hear him speaking to you. But the way he looks at you, his eyes aren’t filled with anger. You take your time, considering his words.

Ao’nung was waiting patiently, he was afraid to do something wrong. Examining your concerned look, he prayed to Eywa for you to trust him. The effort he put to find you and go through this forest without being injured was enormous. Now he understands how hard it is for you to get used to Metkayina’s way of life. He should have thought about it before.

“Don’t come here again.”

And you left, leaving him alone in this forest.

“You are skxawng, Ao’nung.”

--------------------------------------------------------

P.S. There wasn't a lot of Aonung and y/n's conversations and I focused more on her recovery and feelings process, but I hope you liked it! Next parts will be more about Aonung and Y/N! Also, i'm not really sure how taglist thing really work, I hope I did it right🫣

Anyways, if you want to be tagged, comment and I'll add you!

Peace, friendship, bubblegum✌🏻💗

Taglist: @elegantkidfansoul @ijwsbdinp

[kazumist]

EPISODE 22 ✿ IT CAN'T HAPPEN

YOU + ME = LOVE — A DILUC SMAU

masterlist / prev ep / next ep / wc: 526.

“stop following me.”

“(name), if you could please just let me explain," he reaches out to you, trailing behind you hastily.

you stopped in your tracks and faced him, fighting and praying for your voice not to crack. “explain what? explain that you’re leaving the country in, like, what? three weeks?”

“i was going to tell you," he says, attempting to gently grab your arm but you pull yourself back out of his reach. “and when would that be? when you’re about to board that goddamn plane? when you’re about to take your first step into another country? when, diluc?” this is precisely why you didn’t want to fall in love. the attachment that comes with it is enough to make you go insane.

“i—”

he was speechless. for once in his life, diluc was speechless. he always knew what to say; there was never a moment where he would be found hesitating in his words. but for some reason, ever since he met you, this is the first time he actually didn’t know what to say. he knew that if he said another word, it would hurt you—the both of you—more.

“thought so.” your words were cold enough to feel like bullets on his skin.

he calls out your name, unsure if he’s making the right decision right now. but you ignored him, taking this as your chance to speak up.

“you know? i knew it was a bad decision. to let myself fall for you, that is. i should’ve kept my balance before succumbing to whatever the hell this pit is, because fucking hell, diluc ragnvindr—i love you. there, i said it. i love you, diluc ragnvindr. even when i don’t want to, i do.”

silence.

say something—do something, anything, diluc. you thought.

he swallowed. “i can’t, (name). we both have bright futures ahead of us and i’m not sure if i’m ready to juggle a relationship with that. you deserve someone who’s willing to take risks for you, and i’m just not that person. i’m a coward. i’m no risk taker. i’m too scared to even take that leap of faith—even if it means that i get to be with you.”

another moment of silence.

diluc continues, moving closer. his steps were cautious, trying to read if you’d let him (which you did). he grabs your arms on both sides at first, then a hand travels to your face, caressing your cheek ever so gently. “i can still help you and continue being your tutor until the semester ends, but this… us…” a deep breath.

“it can’t happen, (name).”

tears started to sting your eyes when you pulled away from him.

“you know what? let's just end it. finals are over, the semester is ending and you'll be graduating soon. thank you for your help, diluc. i really couldn’t have done this without you.”

you walked past him, not even sparing him another glance back. diluc wants to say something—to do something—but no words come out of his mouth and his feet are glued hard to the ground.

so he just watches you leave, lowering his head down after you leave his sight.

extra notes.

i wrote this chapter when i was still working on ep 9. and this is literally ep 22. i was wayyyyy too excited LOL

anyways this is actually one of my favorite parts. hope you guys liked it as well, happy valentine's <3

taglist (open): @ryuryuryuyurboat @g4bbyyy @kizakiss @quackimilktea @mochiboo123 @thystarsshine @cerisescherries @jamieexistss @the-ghost-0f-t0m0 @aethion @dottoreworld-page @naishite @sleepyeri @staaarhin @eroxotckv @kiyiiaarchived @fallenssun @lolmeowing @dorryx @astolary @kissingkzuha @axerrri @a1-ic3 @lottierulez @livelaughlovekuni @sorcerersseestars @whipped-for-fictionals @morganadorodo @briluvspnk @venderretta @xiaosoneandonly @angeilix @morgyyyyyyy @kazioli @the-massive-simp @qtange @tiredjxnna @yuminako @acheronie @sn1perz @akitokisser @siu-ssi @artri-ad @hyeinszn @saeskiss @bubblegum-angelquartz @boomie-123 @moni11032 @sandwichmyonetruelove @cherrybb-ily @itztaki @dontmindtheevie @hotgirlshit5 [1/2]

[rebouks]

Previous // Next

[Brodie flicked through the mail, instantly recognising the scrawling handwriting of a certain redheaded little boy. Scaring a few birds in the process, he bellowed up the stairs: ALEEEEX!] Alex: [breathless] Is it for me?! Brodie: Nah, but I could do with some help carrying this super heavy envelope upstairs. Alex: Who do you think you are, Johnny Zest? Brodie: I’m better than that guy, c’mon…

… Hi Alex! Sorry it’s taken me so long to reply to you, I promise I didn’t forget! I guess I just didn’t really know what to say cos I’ve sorta not felt like myself recently. My mom says I disappear into my own world sometimes so I sorta did that again and found it hard to think of anything fun to say. I don’t think I’d mind if you wrote to me about the less fun parts of your life though n’ my dad says you shouldn’t really keep everything to yourself all the time cos it ends up hurting so I thought I’d write anyway n’ just force myself not to worry about being boring or whatever. Your letters and your life always sound so exciting compared to mine though so sometimes it’s hard not to!!

I got in a fight at school which sounds like it should be an exciting story, but it wasn’t really. There’s this kid called Levi in my class that always picks on me (don’t worry though, I don’t care about that) and I couldn’t be bothered listening to him anymore so I hit him a couple times, I thought he’d hit me back but he just freaked out so I sorta felt bad about it afterward. He still makes fun of me but he doesn’t get up in my face as much so that’s a plus. Who says violence doesn’t solve anything? Hahaha I’m kidding! It wasn’t nice of me but maybe he should know better than to push people around so much.

I’m looking forward to summer so I can wander off a bit more and maybe it won’t rain so much! My mom doesn’t really like it when I go too far but as long as I’m back before curfew she tries not to freak out about it which is nice of her cos she knows I like to explore n’ stuff. I shouldn’t complain about my family cos I love them n’ stuff but I like being on my own sometimes and it’d be nice to have a bit of peace now n’ then. I’ve got SUPER good hearing so it’s hard to find anywhere quiet in my house, especially cos there’s always something crazy going on. My aunt Alma is sorta similar to me so she’s been helping me block out the noise with this meditation sorta thing, I guess it’s hard to explain but it’s not as lame as it sounds, it’s kinda fun to see how long you can stay in your own brain without people interrupting you. That probably sounds really weird but maybe you sorta get what I mean?

I finally have a treehouse now too!! It reminds me of your watchtower in some ways, but I guess it’s no way cooler than that, even though I know you’re bored of it by now. I wish we could hang out in it together cos it’s super awesome! Mom n’ dad don’t really bother me when I’m up there n’ my brother n’ sisters can’t manage the ladder yet so it’s all mine! It’s right at the bottom of the garden and looks out over the whole Bay too! Mom said she might let me sleep in it once it gets a bit warmer! It’d be cool falling asleep to the sound of the waves.. I hope it doesn’t end up making me need to pee all night though haha!!

Wren’s been obsessed with watching me play on the computer recently and I keep tryna teach her how to play herself but her little fingers can’t really reach all the buttons on the keyboard too well and she gets stupid mad when she dies so she just makes me play instead. She’d kick me if I told anyone but she’s a bit scared of some of the monsters too lol!! Mom told me I shouldn’t let her watch those ones but they’re the only ones she WANTS to watch and she jumps all over me until I give in so idk what they expect me to do other than lock her in the pantry, but I got told off for that so I guess I shouldn’t do that again haha (Wren thought it was funny though so it’s all good!) It’s a shame you don’t have a computer in the tower otherwise we could play together! Jude n’ Jacob aren’t really into that sorta thing so I usually just play on my own. Do you have a computer back home??

Oh! I got another badge for my swimming lessons too! I’ve almost got em all now which is neat but I sorta wanna avoid getting the last ones cos anyone that gets them all or has good attendance n’ whatever get an award at the end of the school year. They save em all up to give out at some stupid last year disco thing they put on before summer for the last year kids n’ it’d be so cringe to get called out in front of everyone like that. Some people think it’s gonna be amazing like my friend Jude, but I’d rather not go at all. Mom n’ dad keep saying it’ll be fun n’ everyone else is excited about it too but how fun could something be if you’re technically at SCHOOL? Bleh! I know you said you hate it sometimes, but being homeschooled sounds awesome to me lol.

I keep tryna bug my parents to go camping again so we could maybe see each other but they won’t take me out of school for a holiday n’ dad’s too busy with some work project so I guess we’ll have to keep writing to each other instead! Maybe if I keep annoying them about it we can come back in the summer! I hope so anyway but I guess I don’t wanna piss em off TOO much just in case my plan backfires or something.

I still feel really bad about not writing sooner but my dad said better late than never so hopefully you’re not too upset with me! I’ll try my best to write faster next time so you don’t have to wait as long. I’m looking forward to hearing about everything you’ve been up to!! Love Robin c: ps. my dad’s friend finally helped me fix that old polaroid so I’ve sent you some random pictures I took to test it out! I’m still getting used to it but the next ones will be better, I swear!

… the treehouse! it even has cool lights on it!! the back of our house! it’s so big it’s hard to fit in a picture.. it sorta looks fancy but it’s not really n’ dad said it was cheap cos it was a shithole a rare Byrd! (grumpy too – dad tried to take his dummy off him lol) he’s not supposed to be on my bed… the Bay! Jude says I sound girly for saying it’s so pretty here but I don’t care I could take a million pictures of this place n’ never get bored (I’ll stop now though cos mom says these polaroid things aren’t cheap for this model.. oops lol!!)

[jjenthusee]

A Part Of The Family

Roy Harper and Lian Harper Drabble!!! (feat. Jason Todd and Dick Grayson)

A/N: if you’ve kept up with me, you might have noticed that I’ve started to stan Roy YAY 😫 it was a crazy deep dive and I got attached to his character lol one of the main reasons i wanted to write for him was because of his Native American/Indigenous upbringing. I was shocked when I found out because (i don’t normally try to share too much about myself cause this is a public space) but i’m indigenous too ✨😌✨ i have to rep my people for Native American Heritage Month *confetti* but i thought i would have to share this to give context on how i plan to write and explore Roy’s character. At least from my research (sorry if this is wrong) but he did grow up on the reservation in some of the backstories and it’s not explored very much :( it explains his tattoo, knowing the language, and frankly, a lot of native rep is kinda bad, but i thought leaving out a major part of his childhood didn’t help reflect who he was. As someone who has experience and lives as a member of the tribe it’s based on, I wanted to share some silly thoughts :) ofc remember all people with cultural backgrounds have different experiences so read this or don’t but i’ll see how this turns out so ENJOY 💐 and comment, like, reblog

Summary: Roy shares a part of his past with Jason and now he’s determined to share an important moment of Lian’s life.

Word Count: 1.2k

“I don’t think she’s going to budge anytime soon.” Roy rested himself on the couch, overlooking his best friend and daughter. They were both on the floor, a soft blanket laid for Lian’s designated tummy time.

Lian blankly watched Jason hold toys, making noises as she followed the sounds, glancing up to look at his excited face as he talked to her.

“Don’t listen to him, Lian. Just over three months of life and we are already best friends.” Jason’s words kept Lian’s attention.

She would give the tiniest smile in return. No laughter yet, but she expressed her enjoyment of Jason’s presence, nonetheless.

Roy was grinning watching the two, a much clearer expression, but remarkably like Lian’s smile. He had been lacking some sleep, but Jason’s frequent visits were helping him get a couple extra minutes of rest.

To Roy’s surprise, Jason had been over almost everyday this week.

The company was fine, better even according to Roy, but he didn’t mean for this to happen. It had been a small slip, a tiny mistake, just a sleepy mumble of his brain when he watched Jason clumsily hold Lian for the first time.

Roy corrected Jason’s hands to be comfortable for him and Lian. In the movement, he had unconsciously spoken.

“This reminds me of way back, when there was a new baby in the community, all the kids would crowd around trying to make funny faces, trying to make the baby laugh.” Roy lulled along to Jason’s slight sway, more confident in holding Lian in his arms. “Then we would hear all the elders yell out to us that we would have to cook if we got the baby to laugh.”

Roy chuckled to himself, remembering the days back on the reservation, feeling the hot sun on his skin.

Jason set his gaze on Roy, never moving his head away from Lian’s tiny body, but focused on the man’s sudden reminiscent tone.

It wasn’t often that Roy mentioned the past, he didn’t discourage it directly, but he also didn’t freely talk about it either.

So, Jason took a chance.

“Cook?” Jason harmlessly questioned, smoothing out the tiny hairs on Lian’s forehead as she stared at his face again.

“Well, it’s a big deal when a baby laughs for the first time. We celebrate and it’s planned by the person who makes the baby laugh.” Roy got up from his spot once he heard the washer finish. “Almost costed my entire savings when one of my friends and I tripped trying to run to the baby first, luckily all we got was a big sneeze.”

Roy threw the damp clothes into the dryer, chuckling to himself.

“I wonder when Lian’s going to laugh.” Roy smiled at the thought. “I hope it’s soon. Wouldn’t mind a lil’ party.”

Roy should have been careful about his words that afternoon.

Now Jason felt determined to be the first person to make Lian laugh.

At this rate, Roy wouldn’t be surprised if he already had the decorations planned out and stashed away somewhere.

It was nice to have company. Roy had usually expected Jason to be there next to Lian, giving laidback greetings.

Then there was another Bat sitting before his daughter.

Dick had unknowingly found out about Jason’s frequent visits and Jason was very pissed about it. Despite his very noticeable apprehension to Dick’s presence, he bit his tongue in favor of Lian finding the new addition intriguing.

Too intriguing. Uncomfortably intriguing and an annoyance to Jason.

“Fu—Get lost, Dickface.” Jason spoke with slight venom in his voice, but it quickly disappeared as he held out his fingers to Lian’s tiny hands.

“But Lian wants me here. Isn’t that right, Lian?” Dick cooed, a twinkle in his eyes as he spoke. Making noises to get her attention.

“Don’t you have other red heads to bother?” Jason scooted closer to Lian, trying to nudge Dick away.

“You’ve been here five days in a row and you expect me to ignore that?” Dick stood up to make faces at Lian from above Jason’s head.

“A man can’t visit a friend?” Jason stood up blocking Dick.

“Then I’m visiting a friend too.” Dick maneuvered his way to Lian’s side in her bouncer.

“Just fucking leave—“ Jason threw Lian’s rattle at the back of Dick’s head.

The tiny sounds bounced off Dick’s back as it collided to his feet.

There was a brief moment of silence before Dick slowly looked back at Jason. A smile was on his face, but the vein in his head was bulging slowly.

“Dinner’s ready—“ Roy called out, making eye contact with the two men wrestling with a baby blanket as Jason tried to somehow twist the fabric to trap his brother.

Dick on the other hand was flexible enough to lessen the hold and pushed the side of Jason’s face with his free hand.

They murmured insults back and forth as calmly as they could, but the strained smiles on their faces couldn’t mask their current wrestling match.

“Stop pushing me—“ Jason grumbled.

“Then stop twisting my arm—“ Dick pressed back.

“Hehehe.”

Three necks snapped to the quiet sound from the ground, almost lost in the commotion, but there was little Lian.

She laid on her back in her bouncer, completely enamored by the noise and movements around her.

She made small movements in her arms in her excitement, a wide gummy smile on her face.

“I made her laugh.” Jason smiled confidently while tightening the baby blanket around his brother.

“I made her laugh.” Dick challenged, trying to kick back.

Roy walked around the two men to pick up Lian, cuddling her in his arms, and unbelievably happy to witness the delightful sounds from his daughter for the first time.

“Nuh uh, Dickwad, it’s my party.” Jason threatened.

“Jaybird, she was looking at me too! Wait, what party?” Dick finally asked.

“Why are you even here?!” Jason groaned.

Roy couldn’t even focus on the two bickering behind him, he was busy kissing the side of his daughter's head.

He tenderly kept her in his arms, seeing her gaze back up at him.

His smile was met with a smaller copy of his own.

Roy had seen and heard of the A’wee Chi’deedloh, the First Laugh Ceremony, in his time living on the reservation. As a kid, it was just a time for him to eat and play with his friends, but it also welcomed a new family member.

He remembers one of the elder women talking to him as a young boy who stood watching from the distance.

“We welcome the baby into our present world from the Spirit World, it’s a time that we share with everyone. It’s the first sign of a baby showing us they want to be a part of the family, to show and give love.” Roy heard the elder talk to him. “Don’t forget to eat and get salt from the baby, it’s their offering to us, to encourage them to be generous as they grow.”

At the time, Roy was involving himself more with the tribe, asking questions and participating. He remembers the look on the baby’s face as he received salt and a bag of goods.

He remembered how content he felt that day eating his sweets and now he would finally experience the perspective of a parent helping their child in the ceremony.

“Welcome, she’awéé’, my Lian.” Roy affectionately whispered to his daughter. “I’m happy you want to be here.”

—

Translations:

She’awéé’ — my baby

A’wee Chi’deedloh — First Laugh Ceremony

Roy Tag List: (temporary) @soysaurus @janybabyy @simpingforheros

[voltadream]

Okay I’m continuing the thought process of the Epic: The Musical cast with SP because I’m still coping after me and my friend bawled our eyes out to Wicked.

Stan - Odysseus.

I feel like this is self explanatory. Stan fits very much in Jorge’s interpretation of Odysseus. He leads with the heart and tries to be level headed and yet, emotions get in the way… Stan is also chronically pining over Wendy so it fits with the link to Odysseus and Penelope.

Kyle - Athena

Need I explain myself?? Kyle! Kyle! Badass in the arena! I was listening to ‘My Goodbye’ on loop and it feels so in character for him. Nurturing yet he can easily lose faith when someone doesn’t fit his expectations or he thinks they’re too far gone… (ehem you’re getting old….) I also think it would make Kyle and Stan’s friendship all the more tragic through the Epic lense.

Cartman - Zeus

Do I even have to explain myself…? They’re both dickheads for the lols…

Butters - Polites

Both rays of sunshine and I think while Stan may not be close with Butters in the show, he would feel the impact of his death. No one to tell him to take it easy or to see the good in bad… it would probably drive Stan crazy.

Kenny - Hermes

I love Kenny as Epic!Hermes. I think they both share that charismatic personality and are also helpers - Kenny willing to sacrifice himself/Hermes helping Odysseus on his journey. I think it makes a lot of sense and Kenny is also a comedic relief in some instances like Hermes so it seems fitting.

Henrietta - Circe

After some thinking. ITS HER. I think her and Kenny have a sibling bond where they tolerate each other but know how to piss the hell out of other. Henrietta is well versed within witchcraft and I think she would also do some twisted shit with Stan’s crew if they wound up at her doors.

Aelos - Nichole

I think Nichole as Aelos would be cute!! They’re both competitive or at least love games of sorts (Board Girls - Aelos creating the game with the wind bag.)

Poseidon - Craig

I think people forget about Stan and Craig’s rivalry within the show. Craig has always had a dislike for Stan’s group until some of the later seasons. So to me it would make sense that Craig would turn on Stan immediately if he fucked up like Odysseus in the Cyclops Saga.

Tolkien - Eurylochus

Tolkien is also level-headed and he isn’t above questioning anyone (Christian Hard Rock for example of this.) I think he would get annoyed with Stan for some of the choices he makes and would drive a conflict within their friendship.

Michael - The Prophet

It makes sense in my head….

Calypso - Leslie

I know she doesn’t have much connection to Stan but I see her as the antagonist in season 19 so apologies…

Apollo - Jimmy

They both adore music!!! I mean bard Jimmy DESERVES to have Apollo represent him!!!

Hephaestus - Tweek

This one is just someone I see Tweek would have a role as in Epic.

Clyde & Bebe - Ares & Aphrodite

I mean it’s ironic yet makes perfect sense. Clyde fronting as the tough guy yet easily gets butt hurt, Bebe the beautiful Aphrodite ??? Perfect.

Hera - Heidi

Instead of ‘never once has he cheated on his wife’ it’s ‘never once has he talked down to his wife,’ and that’s enough for Heidi to say RELEASE HIM.

Wendy - PENELOPEEEE

Now this is self explanatory, she’s Stan’s wife. She is also intelligent like Penelope :) !!

Antonious - Gregory

HEAR ME OUT !! but in the SP movie we see Gregory literally romance Wendy and is so quick to dismiss Stan!! I think it makes sense he’d demean Stan just so Wendy would even consider him.

Now Telemachus would have to be an original character but I think Sparky would be their dog!!

SO HERE IS MY IDEA OF SP CHARACTERS AS EPIC !! I hope you enjoy my drabble xx

[sunshinevanfleet]

all to myself - d. wagner

pairing: danny x reader

a/n: hi guys! here's a little hurt/comfort fic with our favorite bf daniel <3. i'm still working on 'oh, what a sin' so that will probably be out by this weekend! i just wanted to give y'all something to survive off of until i get that out lol. i know i'm constantly saying that i'm working on it but i really am!! it helps sometimes just to take a break and write something else. anyways, hope u all like this one. love u byeee!!

genre: hurt/comfort

word count: 2.2k

summary: danny's finally home from tour and the reader can't wait to spend time with him. only, it seems he has other plans.

warnings: swearing, hurt/comfort, mentions of sex (nothing explicit).

You hated being home without him. The place was so… empty. Loneliness taunted you, a hollow kind of aching in your stomach as you padded around the house all alone. It was too quiet, too big, too encapsulating. It was hard to ignore the fact that you were by yourself when you were surrounded by so much space. Even worse, there were little reminders of Danny at every corner you turned. His plants that you cared for while he was gone, one of his wrinkled shirts hidden behind the couch, a drumstick he’d lost weeks ago. 

Now, as he unpacked his things after finally getting home, you felt bad for being resentful. He worked hard on tour, always did his best to keep in touch with you as much as possible. He couldn’t help his job; you had known exactly what you were signing up for when the two of you started dating… Yet here you were holding it against him. It didn’t help that instead of spending the night with you, he wanted to invite the guys over to work on the new album more. You faked a smile and nodded enthusiastically at his suggestion of inviting the guys over later, but your stomach was churning. It felt like a slight– he had just told you an hour ago how excited he was to be back home with you, how he couldn’t wait to spend every waking minute with you. 

Envy bloomed in your chest, a writhing green monster that made your head spin and your cheeks burn as you watched him from the kitchen. He gesticulated animatedly, explaining one of his ideas to Josh as he nodded along enthusiastically. You clenched your jaw so hard that your teeth ached. It was embarrassing. In your mind’s eye you saw yourself standing there, wine glass clutched in your vice grip, while you fumed over him doing his job. 

You breathed a heavy sigh as you took a long sip of your drink. It was fine– everything was fine. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you forced yourself to take a few deep breaths. Guilt washed over you in waves, again. You felt so ridiculous, standing in the kitchen pouting like a child. If you were going to stand around and mope, you might as well head to bed. But you wanted every second in your boyfriend’s presence that you could get, even if he was ignoring your existence in exchange for his friends. 

In a pathetic attempt for a sliver of attention, you decided to bring him another beer. Even just hearing a simple, “thank you, baby,” would be enough to keep you going until everyone else had gone away. You wandered into the living room, fingers chilled by the bottle. You nudged your way into their little circle, forcing a smile.

“Hey, honey, I brought you–”

“One second,” Danny said, holding a finger up without even glancing your way. There was a pang in your chest. You merely blinked, as he sat listening with rapt attention to Jake’s explanation of a clearly complicated riff he was working on, scribbling fervently in his notebook. 

You waited until Jake had finished his spiel, then began again. “I just wanted to–”

“Can you give us a minute, Y/N? I’m sorry, we’re just in the middle of something.” Danny glanced at you for a second, half-smiling even though his eyes clearly showed he was still preoccupied.

“O-okay,” you nodded, your throat tightening. Slinking back off to the kitchen, you left his drink on the counter. Moisture pricked your eyes, and you pressed your lips together to keep them from quivering. You knew he hadn’t meant anything by it, but he had basically told you to shut up and leave him alone. The hollow ache had returned to your stomach, although now you wanted nothing more than to be alone. You slipped down the hallway and into the bedroom, flicking the light off and curling up on the bed. Pathetically, you laid on his side of the bed, burying your tear-soaked face into his pillow. The stupid pillowcase didn’t even smell like him anymore, it had been so long since he’d been in this room. Every second, you felt worse about him being home. What was the point if he didn’t even want you around?

Another choked sob racked your body. Maybe you were being a little unfair… He was just so excited about this new album, and it made your heart hurt that he didn’t seem nearly as excited to be home with you. After it had been the only thing you were looking forward to for months, you felt like your offense was justified. 

Long after your tears dried, and you laid there for however long listening to the occasional burst of laughter, frenzied arguments about the leading single, and all the other details of their work, it seemed he finally noticed your absence. The sound of the front door closing didn’t even drag you out of your misery; vaguely, you heard the guys saying their goodbyes, telling Danny to have a good night with not-so subtle implications behind their tones, their chorused footsteps exiting your home. Fine. They were gone, and you were finally alone with your beloved Danny. Only now, the last thing you wanted was to have to look him in the eye after the way he treated you this evening. 

You heard a call of your name from down the hall, in his gentlest tone that he reserved for you. Holding yourself tighter, you pulled your knees up to your chest and turned away from the door. The tears were back, the saltiness burning your raw cheeks as they spilled over your face and soaked the already damp pillow. You muffled the sound of your crying in the blanket clutched in your fist. Maybe you could pretend you were sleeping, you thought. 

He knew you better than that.

He padded down the hall, first pushing open the creaky bathroom door to check if you were there. Nope. Then, the study, and the laundry room.

“Y/N, sweetheart, I hope you didn’t fall asleep on me,” he said, pushing open the bedroom door. Warm light from the hallway spilled in; you saw his frame silhouetted on the wall in front of you. 

You said nothing. If he thought you were sleeping, he would leave you alone. You could stew over your feelings and fall asleep. You would be over it by the time it was morning. It seemed foolish, now, that you had been looking forward to tonight. If only you could have predicted the disaster it would become. 

You closed your eyes, pretending… There were a few seconds of quiet movement, and you felt the bed shift beneath his weight. Warmth radiated off of him as he settled into the spot beside you, sitting quietly.

“I know you’re awake,” he said. “Started missing you after I had to listen to Josh retell the story about the– hey, are you crying?” One of his hands reached for you, brushing your hair out of your face. 

“What’s wrong?” he whispered, all of the amusement drained from his voice and replaced with worry. 

You shook your head. You felt even worse now, that you would have to tell him what was wrong. It felt childish, and stupid.

“Oh, sweetheart, I can’t help it if you won’t talk to me,” he continued, gentle. He used the pad of his thumb to brush the tears off of your face. The touch was simultaneously painful and delightful. You swallowed hard. 

Finally, excruciatingly, you forced yourself to turn on your back and look at him. The tears were stifled for now, as you met his inquisitive gaze. He was frowning, which you hated. You always thought he was the kind of person who was just made for smiling. You hated that you were taking that away from him.

“I-I’m sorry,” you croaked, closing your eyes because you couldn’t bear to meet his gaze. One of his hands grasped yours, squeezing gently.

“You don’t have to apologize to me, not for crying, my love…” his voice trailed as he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead.

“No, I have to apologize, Danny,” you said shakily. “I’ve been back here pouting for no reason and you’re finally home and I’m sulking in the bed–”

“What happened? Tell me so I can fix it, please.” His eyes were pleading, his voice laced with concern. 

You shook your head, face flushing at the thought of telling him why you were upset. Now that he was sitting beside you, his touch tender as he attempted to comfort you… You didn’t have the same vindication anymore. 

“Nothing,” you said, trying to steady your breathing. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“Y/N…” He sighed heavily, pulling his gaze away from you and staring out into the empty hallway for a moment. He was concerned, and frustrated. You knew he wanted to help but couldn’t bear explaining to him that this all was because of him. “You didn’t lay in here crying for the last hour for nothing.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

His frown deepened and he turned back to you. “Sit up,” he said gently. You did so, crossing your legs beneath you. He matched your position, the two of you sitting across from one another with your knees touching in the center. You met his gaze in some kind of ridiculous staring contest. 

“You’re upset.”

You nodded. 

“And is there something I can do to help?”

You mulled it over. You supposed it would help if he just acknowledged that he was wrong to brush you off like that. You nodded again.

“Okay. I need you to tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart. I only want to help you, you know that.” He rubbed patterns into the back of your hand with his thumb, his touch feather-light. You nodded, chewing on your bottom lip as you tried to figure out how to explain to him why you were upset. 

“It’s just–” you began, but you felt your chest tightening again. You stopped, forcing a deep breath before you spoke again. “Well, I just really wanted to spend time with you tonight… But you invited the guys over for work, and you all just got so caught up with it, and– I mean, I was trying to do something nice and bring you a drink and I felt like you just brushed me off like you didn’t even care…” 

He listened attentively as you rambled, his face neutral. He nodded at your words, and wiped your tears again as they returned. 

“I know it sounds stupid, and childish, and I’m making a big deal like I always do–”

He held up a finger, a slight smile playing on his lips.

“Did it hurt you?” he asked simply.

“Well… yes,” you said.

“Then it’s not stupid, or childish, my love,” he leaned forward, pressing a chaste kiss to the corner of your lips. “It matters to you, and I should be more aware of that. I promise, I wasn’t trying to hurt you. But I see how that was hurtful.”

“You do?” Your voice shook.

“Of course,” he said, “You were looking forward to this for a while, weren’t you?”

You nodded fervently. “I’ve felt so– so alone these last couple of months. And I just wanted you to myself for a few hours…”

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” his eyes were sincere, honest. Your worries were melting away as he kissed the back of your hand. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize how much it meant to you, and I’m sorry I brushed you off…”

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner,” you breathed, leaning into him. You all but crawled into his lap, and he wrapped his arms around you without skipping a beat. He planted another kiss on your shoulder, then rested his chin there as he listened to you speak. You felt much better, secure wrapped in his strong embrace. “I haven’t been very fair to you tonight, either.”

He smiled, that bright dazzling smile, and you couldn’t help but match it. “I forgive you, my love. I’ll always forgive you. And I hope you’ll do the same for me.”

“Always,” you said, leaning down to brush your lips against his. He was still smiling as you pulled away. 

“I missed you, pretty girl… How about I clear my schedule tomorrow? You can have me all day long…” His eyes flashed with amusement.

“Oh, yeah?” you laughed lightly. “What was on your schedule before then?”

“Hmmm, let me think…” He furrowed his brow and wrinkled his nose as if he were deep in thought. You rolled your eyes at your goofball of a boyfriend. “I think it went something like this: morning sex with Y/N, breakfast with Y/N, shower sex with Y/N, farmer’s market with Y/N, pre-lunch sex with Y/N–”

“Oh, hush, you big doofus.” But you were giggling away, your heartbreak from hours ago almost completely forgotten. “Do you ever think about anything besides sex?”

“Of course I do,” he said. Then added cheekily, “Music, mostly.”

You rolled your eyes, feigning exasperation. You were just happy to finally have him all to yourself.

[kywaslost]

Hii!! I hope you are having a good day❤

Would it be okay to ask some comfort with Hawks (or Izuku) where the reader feels like they are always annoying him and apologizing about it a lot.

Like they feel like they might be too clingy at times, or that they are talking too much when getting excited about something. Or if they ask him to do something small like asking for a water they immediately say something like "actually no, I'm sorry I can get it for myself."

Basically they are just afraid they are being annoying and he would eventually start hate them for it and leave

(I love your writings so much!!❤ Reading them makes me always smile! :3 I hope you had good Christmas!❤)

You Don’t Bother Me - Izuku

A/N: Hey! My day’s been alright, hope you’re having an amazing day <3 I love this idea so much because this is my thought process lol. I always find that my writings are better when I can have some sort of personal connection with them :) And I’m so glad you like my writings, that makes me so happy!! I hope you had an amazing Christmas as well!!!!

Most people have the slight thought pass through their mind from time to time, ‘am I annoying?’. Of course, there are some who don’t give a care in the world, and those are the people no one can stand most of the time. Then there are the ones who sometimes act on this thought, maybe opting out of certain actions or choosing not to say certain things just to be a more likable person. Finally, there are the ones who overthink this thought. They stew over it endlessly, which only ends up with them convinced to the high heavens that they are the most bothersome person around and no one likes them.

Alright, maybe you didn’t take it that far, but you most certainly were one of the few people who overthink about their status with others. Especially your boyfriend Izuku Midoriya. He was just so sweet and kind to you that you sometimes felt like maybe he thought it was a chore to help you with things or to do things for you.

You weren’t sure when you first thought he may be annoyed by you. Maybe it was the time when you asked him for an emergency study date for math because you had an exam the next day and were lagging behind in class a bit. You felt bad because Izuku already had work studies with Endeavor and he looked worn down, but nevertheless, he smiled softly and said, “Sure. I’ll meet you in your dorm in about half an hour.”

That night, as you lay in bed, you began to think of every time Izuku had inconvenienced you. The countless times he had helped you with homework, or dropped whatever he was doing to calm you down when you got anxious or scared. That happened often. You rolled over, pulled your blanket tighter around yourself, and tried to sleep away the thoughts.

A few days later, you were hanging out in Izuku’s room. You both had the day off and chose to spend the day together. Izuku had just gotten out of the shower and flopped down on his bed when you walked into the room. Your movements were quick and it startled the boy.

“Are you alright, Y/N?”

You huffed, blowing hair from your eyes as you turned to your boyfriend. You began to pace as you answered, “I’m fine. Just frustrated.”

“Why?” Izuku sat up, all of his attention on you as you began to ramble.

“I was playing Minecraft with (best friend), you know, my friend from middle school, and we had cheats on to keep inventory. We decided I could use commands to find the location of the nearest stronghold, which was 1071 blocks away.” You went on to explain how you spent an hour and a half mining to the strong hold just for it to be a staircase and 1 room. No hallways, no portal room.

The more in detail you got in your little rant, the more you began thinking that Deku would rather talk about something else, or how this is just an inconvenience for him. As you neared the end of your tale you spoke slower and a lot quieter. “Sorry. You probably didn’t want to hear all of that.”

Izuku laughed gently, shaking his head. “I don’t mind Y/N. I love hearing your rants.” He stood up and pulled you into a hug, resting his chin on your head with a smile. “Now what do you want to do today?”

As time passed you couldn’t help but feel like you were bothering Izuku. When deciding what to eat for lunch, Izuku insisted he’d make whatever you wanted since you were much more of a picky eater than he was. You felt bad, because you knew he didn’t particularly like what you were craving at the moment. And then you felt bad because he was cooking for you.

“No, Izu, I can make lunch myself,” you smiled slightly. “I know you don’t really like (favorite food).”

“I’ll cook whatever you want me to,” he smiled back. “Really, it’s no bother.”

When the two of you went to train later in the afternoon, you finally met your breaking point. You felt so bad for Izuku. In your mind, he had to deal with you and put you before himself. You had to start training on what you needed to work on, and breaks had to be taken whenever you were feeling weary. Every time you asked Midoriya if he needed a break because he was looking worn down, he’d deny it and keep training.

During one of your breaks, you fell to the ground and let the coolness of the floor cool you off. You had finished off your water bottle on the last break, so you had nothing to drink for the moment.

“Y/N, I’m going to go get a snack, would you like anything?” your boyfriend asked, looking down to you on the floor.

“Yeah, can I have some water? I drank all of mine.” The second the words left your mouth, you regretted them. You didn’t want to annoy Izuku more than you thought you already had. “Actually, I’m sorry. I can get it myself.” You pushed yourself up on your feet, swaying slightly.

Izuku placed a hand on your shoulder to steady you, frowning. “Hey, no, don’t be sorry. I can get it. You need to rest for a moment.”

You shook your head, tears brimming your eyes. And then you cried, covering your face with your hands.

Your sudden outburst startled Izuku, and his arms immediately wrapped around you in a tight hug. “Honey, what’s wrong? Are you overworked? Did I do something?”

You took a moment to cry into your boyfriend’s chest, gripping his sweaty shirt. It took a while, but your sobs finally died down to soft whimpers and you were able to speak again. “I feel so bad for annoying you,” you sniffled. “I”ve been bothering you a lot recently. I’m just afraid you’re going to have enough of it and break up with me because I’m too clingy. I--”

Izuku cuts you off, hugging you tighter. “Baby, you aren’t bothering me. You don’t annoy me. You aren’t clingy, Y/N.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head and sighed. “I figured something was going on. You’ve been apologizing a lot more. I was worried about you. But I’m glad you’ve told me what’s going on.” He gently pushed you to sit down on the bench behind you, then wiped the tears from your eyes with his thumb. “I’m going to get you some water and a snack. Then we’ll head back to the dorms. We’re going to spend the rest of the evening talking through this.” He smiled softly. “I want you to feel comfortable, n/n. I love you. I hope you know that.”

Izuku spent the rest of the night helping you work through your feelings. He reassured you that you were never a bother to him and that he would do anything for you. He ordered your favorite take-out, put on your favorite tv show, and cuddled you in his bed. Deku hated that you felt this way, and he promised to work with you on your self-esteem around him.

[therumbleof1967]

hello! i was curious to see if u could do a fem reader x dallas?

where reader is just really stressed, overstimulated and having a really bad day and she promised one of her friends (angela) that she would go to this party with her and reader promised she would and she doesn’t wanna back out. and reader is struggling with her hair and dallas ends up coming to her house to see her and finds her crying and she explains that she’s just upset and sad and he just holds her and comforts her and tells angela himself that reader isnt going, dallas ends up staying the night and comforts her.

does that make sense?

if not im sorry! u dont have to do it

much love <3

Hey! Oh my gosh I’m so sorry I haven’t gotten to this, I haven’t checked my inbox in FOREVER lol 😂. YES! This makes so much sense and I LOVESE this idea! I hope you enjoy this story, sending you and your loved ones much love as well, stay gold friends ☀️

A Night In

I had promised Angela, my ever-enthusiastic friend, that I would join her at the party tonight. But as I struggled with my hair, trying to tame the frizz that seemed to mock my every attempt, I couldn’t help but feel the sadness bubble up. I twisted my hair into a knot, frustration boiling over, and hot tears slid down my cheeks.

“Come on, Y/N,” I muttered to myself, wiping my face with the back of my hand. “You can’t back out now.” But the thought of mingling in a loud, crowded room made me feel even more overwhelmed. My brain felt like it was in a constant state of overdrive.

I buried my head in my hands, feeling utterly defeated. That’s when I heard a knock on my bedroom door. “Y/N? It’s me, Dally!” His voice, laid-back yet somehow always filled with concern, cut through the noise in my head.

“Go away, Dallas,” I called, hoping he’d take the hint. But after a moment, the door creaked open, and he peeked in.

“What’s going on in here? You look like you’ve been through a tornado,” he said, stepping inside. His hazel eyes widened when they landed on my tear-streaked face, and he walked over to me, kneeling down to meet my gaze.

“I just... I can't.” The words tumbled out, barely audible between sobs. I confessed, “I promised Angela I’d go to the party, but I can’t handle it. I’m just so stressed and tired.”

Dallas’s expression softened, a rare gentleness replacing his usual bravado. “Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to pretend around me.” He reached out, brushing a few strands of hair away from my face, and the simple gesture grounded me.

“I feel so overwhelmed, Dally. Everything is just... too much,” I admitted, my voice shaking.

He let out a breath, leaning back against my bed and pulling me gently into his arms. I melted against him, the warmth of his body bringing a strange sense of comfort. “You’re not alone, alright? Tell Angela I’ll take care of it. You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

I shook my head, feeling the weight of my feelings slacken a little. “I don’t want to disappoint her.”

“Who cares about disappointing her. You need to take care of yourself first,” Dallas said, his voice steady. “We’ll hang out here instead. Just the two of us. We’ll order some pizza or something and watch bad movies.”

I smiled faintly, appreciating his idea. That sounded so much better than mingling at a party. “You really don’t mind?”

“Not at all, babe,” he replied with a casual shrug, although I knew how much he valued his social life. “I’ll text Angela and let her know what’s up. Promise she’ll understand.”

He pulled out his phone, typing swiftly, while I leaned back against my pillows, allowing myself to breathe a little easier. It was as if the weight on my chest began to lift with each passing moment. He looked up, catching my gaze. “See? You're already doing better.”

“Thanks, Dally,” I whispered, feeling a warmth bloom in my chest.

“Anytime. I’m not going anywhere.” He settled beside me, his presence soothing in the chaotic whirlwind of my thoughts.

As the minutes drifted by, I felt the tension slowly dissipate. Dallas stayed beside me, occasionally cracking jokes or recounting absurd stories from his day. Each laugh felt like a balm to my soul, and I couldn’t help but find solace in the way he effortlessly lightened my mood.

By the time the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a soft glow in my room, I felt a deep sense of comfort. I closed my eyes, resting my head against his shoulder. “You know, I think you’re the best distraction I could’ve asked for,” I admitted softly.

“Guess I have my moments,” he replied, the corner of his mouth lifting in a smirk.

As I listened to his voice, feeling grateful for this unexpected night, I realized that sometimes, all you needed was someone to remind you it was okay to take a step back and breathe. And with Dally by my side, I knew I could face tomorrow, one breath at a time.

[lyn-1225]

One Word Interview

Pairing: Tobi Brown x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Sexual References like a lot, Fluff. That’s about it. 

Word count: 8,000-9,000

https://youtu.be/kgiag4GKwF0

YouTube video link ^^^

A/n: sorry for my bad writing I hope you like this :) this is also a pretty long one as well so grab a snack and stay hydrated lol

_____________________________________________

Your POV:

“Welcome, to another One Word Interview today i’m joined by four very special guests” Simon says to the camera gesturing to Me, Gee, Talia, and Freya.

“Eyy” Gee smiles to the camera. I chuckle, wiping my slightly sweaty hands on my black ripped skinny jeans. I couldn't help but feel nervous. I’ve been in a few Sidemen videos so i was sort of used to this but it was still anxiety inducing. 

“Girlfriends” Simon finishes. Talia gives a sarcastic smile, putting her fist to her chin. I laugh pushing her shoulder a bit making her smile. Me and the rest of the girls are extremely close. I consider them my best friends.

“What?” Freya asks acting offended at his words. Simon purses his lips looking at all of us. At Simons face Talia starts laughing trying to keep her composure. “That’s rude” Freya chuckles when Talias head fly's back silently laughing, Simon also laughing at Freyas words. 

I look over to Tobi who is laying down on the couch silently scrolling on his phone with a smile on his face. He lifts his head noticing that i was looking at him. He smiles a large genuine smile knowing that my anxiety was running a bit. “Oh my god” i mouth to him shaking my head slightly with a smile making him chuckle a bit. I chuckle as well looking back towards Simon.

“I am joking i’m joined with Gee” Simon says gesturing to Gee who makes herself know with a warm “Hi” throwing her hands up. Simon then looks to me “Y/N” he says pointing a hand at me. I smile to the camera saying “Hola” while giving a small wave. “Talia” he continues on before Talia introduces herself with a nice “Hello” slightly putting both her hands up. “And Freya” he finishes, her looking into the camera throwing an arm up saying “Hey”. 

“All their links are in the description umm yeah, lets just, lets just start this” Simon says looking at his feet holding his phone in his hand already wanting it be over.

“I’m scared” gee says with a nervous smile on her face. Immediately I agree with her slightly gripping the arms of the chair I was currently sitting in. Looking over to Tobi I give him a small tight lipped smile. He gives me a reassuring look smiling at me.

A few nerves leave my body as I smile back at him pulling my hoodie sleeves down over my hands. I don’t know why Im so nervous but I am. I’ve always been like that. I was diagnosed with anxiety around the age of 13. So I had at least a little bit of anxiety during any situations that included more than just one person. I learned to find ways to distract myself from that anxiety. When I met Tobi he helped me through any anxiety attacks, paranoia and any overthinking I’ve had. I’m so grateful to have him.

“Let��s go with the big question first. Does size matter?” Simon asks us looking up from his phone with an interested look. Talia scrunches her face while I immediately answer “no”. Tobi looks at me with a smile knowing that was my true and honest answer.

Shortly after my answer Freya and Gee agree saying “no” as well. “Sure. Not” Talia says making me confused. Simons face has a surprised look maybe a little of worry showing through as well making me laugh. “No, I forgot it is a one word interview” Talia laughs while Freya and Gee both look very surprised at her first answer.

“Okay I haven’t explained. This is a one word interview” Simon remarks looking directly into the camera. “I did say that” he looks towards JJ. “Do you understand?” He asks looking back towards us mostly looking at Talia.

Talia hums in understanding while the rest of us nod. “Yeah” she says making sure the viewers and everyone else knew what she meant. “You sure?” Simon asks still looking at her.

Silence fills the room as Simon continues to stare at her waiting for her to answer. Gee points to Talia answering for her “yeah”. “Wait so they said size matters?” JJ asks Simon off camera with a puzzled yet slightly offended expression. “No they said size doesn’t matter” Simon tells JJ looking over to him.

“No” I repeat playing with my phone that is currently inside of my hoodie pocket. “Oh JJ, Cal, and Tobi are off screen” Simon clarifies as to why JJ was suddenly speaking during the video. JJ begins to talk while me and the others are chuckling. “Wait so if someone came through with a one inch” JJ stops waiting for our response.

If I’m being honest i wasn’t really to familiar with the whole sexual scene. I’m very much a virgin. I’ve only had a few boyfriends in my life and they weren’t like that. Mostly because they only lasted a few weeks. When I met Tobi it opened up many new things for me. We haven’t ‘done it’ yet but I’ll know when the time is right.

“Angles” Freya responds looking directly at him with one leg crossed over the other. “Angles?” JJ asks with a ‘really’ attitude. “Nice” I smile reaching over Talia to pat Freyas knee. She smiles back at me patting my hand before I lean back into my chair turning back to the guys.

“One word! I like that” Simon smiles pointing to Freya. “Yeah” she says with a smile on her face, proud of the word she chose. “All he is doing is penetrating your flap” JJ remarks making me go wide eyed.

Talia and I cringe at his sentence me being a little to embarrassed. I cover up one side of my face with my sleeve covered hand trying to hide my faint blush from the others. A few feet away I hear Tobi chuckle meaning he knows about my embarrassment.

“You need to stop” Simon says a huge smile on his face as he scrolls through his phone looking for another question. Everyone laughs at Simons words while JJ try’s to speak again. “No look” Simon exclaims pointing his index and middle finger at him slightly. “That made me die inside” Talia says pointing to herself with a sort of grossed out expression. “Agreed” I state still feeling the warmth in my cheeks.

“Virgin?” Freya says pointing at JJ slightly as a question more than a statement. I laugh holding my hand to my chest as everyone laughs along with me.

“You’ve all seen friends, I assume, a little bit?” Simon asks moving on to the next question. The girls agree while I sit there looking blankly at him.

If I’m being honest I’ve never watched it. I’ve heard about it and I’ve seen little clips but not enough to define anything.

“No” I say getting a few gasps from beside me and from the couch. “Okay well you can try your best” Simon says smiling at me. I nod my head as if saying ‘okay’. “Which one of the friends group are you?” Simon asks putting his phone down to look back at us.

“Phoebe” Freya answers right away nodding her head. “Why?” He asks wanting her to clarify. “Slow” she responds as Gee laughs at her reason. “Alright that’s a good answer” Simon chuckles looking to JJ then back to us. “Phoebe” Talia says looking towards the camera. “Why?” He asks wanting her to clarify as well. “Dramatic” she says making me nod.

She looks at me with a fake offended face before pushing me a bit while laughing. “Copied her answer still” Simon states looking towards me and Gee. I look to Gee silently telling her that she can go first. “Phoebe” she says nodding. “Okay” Simon nods signaling for her to continue on with her clarification. “Dumb” she laughs as Freya and her reach over me and Talia to high five. “I’ve got a sweaty hand” Gee says wiping her hand across her leg.

“Okay y/n?” Simon turns to me wanting my answer. I look at him with a blank face pointing over to Freya. “Freya” I say getting a few confused looks exchanged. “Elaborate please” Simon says sitting up a bit more. “Phoebe” I say not knowing anyone else. “Why?” Simon asks looking at me. “Slow” I clarify slightly feeling bad that I took Freyas answer. I just didn’t know what else to say. “Okay okay” Simon says scrolling through his phone once again. “I’m sorry I literally didn’t know who else to say” I chuckle nervously rubbing my legs.

“It’s true” Tobi chuckles replying to my reason as to why I chose Phoebe. I nod my head as everyone laughs. “What’s the most important thing in your life” Simon asks repositioning himself. “Happiness” Gee says putting her hands on either side of her face creating a ‘v’. I smile knowing that answer is true. “Aww” Simon exclaims moving his attention to me. “Phone” i smile getting a gasp from Tobi. He puts a hand on his chest in mock offense. Everyone laughs as I reach towards Tobi “kidding” I fake smile making everyone laugh more than they already were.

He smiles over to me as the laughter starts to die down. Simon turns to Talia now wanting her answer. “Talia?” Simon asks basically saying it her turn. “You?” She says definitely more as a question. “Music” she suddenly says with a straight face into the camera. I bust out laughing patting Gees knee a few times. “I was about to vom everywhere” Freya responds making me laugh a little more. “I was gonna say” Simon says looking at his phone with a smile.

My laughter dies down as I wipe the small stray tears that fell from my eyes. “She went with my music apparently” Simon says still looking at his phone. “Not your music” she says Freya and Gee laughing. “You said you. Music.” Simon responds very casually. Talia looks at him with an ‘are you dumb’ look on her face.

He moved on looking over to Freya. “Freya?”. “Family. I know that’s boring” Freya says in a sweet tone holding both her hands. “No that’s a good one” Talia says nodding her head.

“Who’s the best looking at of you?” Simon asks the next question getting a laugh from Talia, Gee and Freya. “Oh here we go” JJ says making Simon laugh. I answer immediately “them”. Freya, Talia, and Gee ‘aw’ while Simon looked at the camera with a weird look. “I don’t know if that counts” he says rubbing his chin. “Why not” I ask confusion written on my face. “I answered your question with one word. So it counts” I say crossing my arms giving him a small glare. Simon chuckles slight nervousness crossing his face. “We’re gonna move on cause I’m slightly afraid” Simon says making me laugh.

“Subjective” Freya says looking at Simon. Talia looks over to her in awe at how good her answer is. “Banger” she yells smacking her hands together. “That was good” i say nodding my head. To be honest, shes coming up with big words in her head that i wouldn't think of unless i read a dictionary. “Thank you” she replies in a proudful way. 

“ok so you cant use that answer anymore” Simon says a look of disappointment on his face. “i dont know” Talia slightly whines moving her hand up while frowning. To be fair after Freyas word i dont think i would know either. Turning my head in Gees direction i see her writing in the air with a focused look on her face. “Gees doing maths” Simon says getting a laugh out of everyone in the room. 

Finally coming up with a word Talia looks at Simon before saying “impossible”. Freya nods pointing at Talia. “Well-rounded” Gee starts before immediately throwing in that the word is hyphenated. If i was being honest i was a bit confused on what she meant. I sort of knew though. 

“Did you just call them all fat?” Simon exaggerates looking at Gee in a ‘oh my god’ manner. We all laugh knowing that isn’t what she meant.

“No!” Gee says trying to make sure we knew she didn’t mean it like that. Lifting her arms up she starts to create an invisible circle with her arms. Blowing the action out of proportion Simon starts to yell “look! You see that?! She’s calling them fat again” he then starts to create a circle of his own with a smile on his face at the entertainment he’s now getting.

“Balanced” Gee smiles towards the camera continuing the circle with her arms. Freya immediately talks after her saying “curvy”. Nodding I smile liking the way she turned a hurtful word into something that is more positive.

Moving on to the next question Simon looks at his phone before speaking. “Ok so this one is just for Freya, Y/N, and Gee” he says as Freya takes a sip of her Starbucks drink.

“Oooh yes” Gee exclaims clapping. I slightly smirk to myself knowing that it’s obviously got something to do with the girl sitting next to me. Looking over to her she shows her disappointed demeanor knowing it’s about her. Freya then flips her off making me laugh at the situation.

Mentally preparing for the question I take a deep breath letting my shoulders relax a bit. “Out of me and Talia. Who is the settler?” He asks getting a laugh from Freya. “Neither” she responds leaning back into her chair. “Oh damn” Talia says in a small voice.

Simon looks around confused. “Judge, judge?” He asks looking in the direction of cal, JJ, and Tobi. Callux gets up joining Simon on camera before talking towards us instead of towards the camera. “I’m entering this part of the video to say that-” Callux starts before getting cut off by a laughing Simon.

“You just randomly popped up.” Everyone laughs thinking about what it would look like for the viewers when Simon posts the video. “To say that your making the vid boring” Callux finishes making Freya and Talia start busting out laughing. I chuckle to myself thinking about the answer I was gonna give. They want interesting I’ll give them interesting.

“We want some drama!” Both Lux and Simon say at the same time Simon being a bit more loud about it. “We want some argument!” Freya yells clapping her hands together.

“Talia” Gee says pointing her thumb in Talias direction. “Hm” Talia hums looking over towards Simon as if in a proudful way. Simon looks at us dumbfounded with a slightly angry look in his eye.

That alone makes me laugh at his expression. What can I say? It’s funny to me. I have a very dead sense of humor.

The rest of the girls laugh as Talia begins to speak “I’ve never heard someone say something so like uncomfortable. Talia.”

“Ok Y/n” Simon says gesturing for me to answer his original question. At first I had a good answer that was sure to start something, but me being me I completely forgot about my answer. “I don’t know” I slightly laugh knowing I’ll have to come up with something soon.

“That’s three words” Simon points up three fingers slightly moving them in the process. “Talia” I respond looking over to her silently saying sorry.

“Moving on” I say wanting the attention to be off of me and onto the next question.

“In life who is better - Chip or Zerka. You have to pick” Simon smiles looking between us and the guys off screen.

Talia and JJ start to talk at once JJ saying something that I couldn’t really hear over the loud talking and Talia saying “Do you see how I’m getting absolutely-” before Simon interrupts her saying “that is many words!”

Talia gets a bit defensive making me laugh. “I was talking to them!” She says in a fast voice pointing towards the camera a few feet away from us. “Many words!” Simon repeats laughing.

“Josh” Talia suddenly says gaining impressed “oohs” from around the room. Simon looks down at his phone very disappointed that he got outsmarted. I pat Talias knee as Gee reaches over me and gives Talia a high five.

JJ continues his ‘ohs’ but in a completely different way than the rest of us where. It honestly made me confused. “It didn’t answer my question!” Simon yells getting frustrated with the fact that we keep out smarting his questions.

I suddenly realize why JJ was still ohing when he yelled out “drama alert!”

We all look at him weirdly before Simon turns back to us after staring at JJ with the same expression as all of us.

Pointing his thumb towards him, Simon looks at us with the most serious face he could conjure up “I don’t think he knows chips first name is Josh.” JJs face gives it away that Simon is correct making everyone in the room start laughing. Freya puts her hands over her mouth saying “oh my god” as if in disbelief.

“That is why he is shouting drama alert” Simon laughs doubling over in his seated position. “Shit” JJ remarks slightly embarrassed. “I was like, that was the least drama answer” Simon continued shortly followed by Talia who yells “he’s like oh damn!!”

We all start to settle down a bit still chuckling from what just happened. “Did you really think his real name was chip?” Simon asks JJ turning to look at him. Seriousness written all over his face. “Surely not” Freya replied looking at JJ hoping he wasn’t thinking that.

“No I just didn’t know his real name, I just knew it was chip” JJ says, everyone looking at him dumbfounded. “What!!” Talia yells leaning forward in her chair. I was trying to hold back my laughter the entire time as I lowered my head knowing his embarrassment.

“Yeah?” JJ countered more as a question than a statement. Deciding to let it all go we all laugh it off a bit more before Simon asks the next question.

“What does ‘KSI’ stand for?” Simon asks looking up from his phone. Gee immediately responds with “easy” while Freya thinks of a way for us to respond. “Knowledge” Freya says before pointing to Talia. Talia gets the hint responding with “strength” before pointing into my direction. Deciding I had a better answer I pointed to Gee so that she could finish what was started “integrity.”

“Your too smart for this” Simon sighs pointing to Freya while leaning back. Freya nods while Talia agrees with her boyfriend “yeah what the hell is going on?”

“Can you not answer first?” He asks laughing to himself before looking back down to his phone. “She is banging” Talia exclaims to which Gee immediately says “I knew that one” while holding her arms out to her sides. (Like this 🤷🏻‍♀️)

After everyone’s calmed down Simon turns to me suddenly realizing that I didn’t give an answer. “Wait Y/n didn’t give an answer” he says gaining the attention from everyone else. I smile to myself liking the answer that I originally picked out to this question “money.”

Talia nods with a tight lipped smile while the others laugh. “True” JJ remarks with a small smile on his face while he’s scrolling through his phone. Simon looks at his phone again looking for another question to ask us. Deciding on the question he starts to read out loud “you go to one place in the world for the rest of your life, where would it be.”

“Warmth” Freya answers having to explain after seeing everyone’s confusion. “That means anywhere warm” she clarifies as I nod in slight agreement. “You may as well have just said cringe” Callux jumps in off camera. Freya bows her head making me feel slightly bad for her while Gee ‘ohs’ and Talia gives no one in particular the stink eye before saying “who invited him?”

I laugh pulling my leg up onto the chair in a more comfortable position. My knee currently resides a few inches away from my chin giving my head a great place to rest.

“Yo, we didn’t actually invite him. He just turned up” Simon says not knowing why he’s there either. It allows for entertainment though. “England” Talia says shrugging as if it’s the most obvious answer.

I’ve always wanted to visit different places of the world. I’ve always liked adventure because of the beautiful sites you can experience. “Umm” I start still thinking over my final answer. “Travel” I finish smiling to myself.

“Home” Gee follows gaining a few confused looks. “Twitch con” she clarifies Simon and Callux laughing the loudest while the rest of us silently chuckle.

Simon moves on to the next question scrolling through his phone for what feels like the thousandth time. “Out of the other three, who do you think is the best streamer?” Simon asks us waiting for our responses.

This question was a bit unfair considering the fact that I didn’t stream. Don’t get me wrong streaming seems cool and all, but it wasn’t really my thing. Of course I’d play a few games of fall guys, GTA, etc. with the sidemen and the girls but it wasn’t the sort of thing where I would play for a living. I was more of a art type of person.

“Me!” I yell raising my hand in a childlike way gaining the attention of everyone. Everyone laughs knowing I don’t stream. Gee nudges me making me laugh along with everyone else as I lower my arm. “Ok I can admit this question is unfair for you” Simon admits still laughing. I nod my head at him even though it doesn’t bother me.

“Gee” Freya says me and Talia quickly agreeing with her. I wouldn’t watch streams often but when I did watch one it was a lot of hers. Besides Tobi of course.

“What’s your answer? I will ask why” Simon asks Gee pointing his phone in her direction. “Gee” she responds pointing to herself. Feeling proud of her I pat her shoulder slightly shaking it. Confidence is something everyone struggles with so this is a great thing for her.

“Yes!” Freya claps feeling the exact same feeling I was. “Okay why?” Simon asks looking between all of us. “Experience” Freya starts Talia saying her answer straight after her “built.” The attention turns to me waiting for my answer as to why I chose Gee. “Entertaining” I say remembering the few streams I watched of hers that caught my attention.

“Winner” Gee says still pointing to herself as I bend down in my chair reaching for my water bottle that was currently standing next to my chair on the floor. “So you chose yourself cause winner?” Simon asks as if it’s the most confusing thing he heard.

“Award” Gee clarifies seeing his confused look. “Oh!” Freya realizes holding her drink in between her hands. “Student of the year” Talia says giving a bit more detail in Gees answer.

I remember getting student awards when I was in elementary school. Not gonna lie, one of my most proudest moments. I turn towards Gee placing my arm around her shoulders lightly squeezing her left shoulder as if I was her mom letting her know that I was proud of her.

I’ve always been known as the mom of the group. Making sure everyone has drunk water, eaten food, hasn’t gotten in trouble, etc. that’s just the type of person I was. I’m proud of myself for it because it allows people to trust me. Not in a manipulative way but in a friend way.

“What is Talias worst quality?” Simon moves on looking to us. He puts his phone up to his chin very interested in what we have to say about his girlfriend that was sitting pretty much right across from him.

Cal, JJ and Tobi all slightly sit up as well suddenly interested in this topic. “Particular” Freya starts her voice kind of hesitant. Gee laughs before saying “sassy.” I agree with her knowing that Talia can be a little much sometimes. We’ve been friends for awhile so I pretty much have seen a lot of her sassy moments.

“Sarcastic” I say giving a quick response. I look towards her nodding my head at her as if saying ‘yup you know it’s true’. She laughs shaking her head at me before Freya looks at Simon. “I want to change my answer” she says suddenly coming up with a better answer than her first one.

Simon nods before she continues with her change of word. “Impulsive” she says getting nods and words of agreement from everyone. “That’s not always a bad thing” Simon says to Freya her agreeing with him. “No but, you don’t understand” she says as I quickly agree with her remembering all of the impulsive decisions me and her have done together.

“What is Gees worst quality?” Simon asks us looking up once again. Shit. He’s gonna go through all of us. “Losing” Talia says making Gees face drop in confusion and offense. I thinks she might have said the first thing that popped up in her head. Everyone starts to laugh JJ having the loudest laugh out of all of us.

“A quick flashback” Simon starts pointing towards Gee “winner” he finishes everyone continuing to laugh. “She loses everything” Talia sort of clarified. I’m pretty sure she meant as in forgetting where things are but you could interpret it as failing at things. “Forgetful” I say trying to make sure they knew what Talia meant.

Gee and Talia both agree Talia looking at me as if saying thank you. “Forgetful, skatty, losing” Talia names out different words for what she means. Simons face suddenly goes a little frightened when he lets out a laugh “I thought you said sketty” he says everyone laughing at what he said.

“All I heard was sketty” Simon repeats this time emphasizing the word ‘sketty’ while nodding his head. “Boys it’s working” Simon cheers pumping his fist as he turns to look at the three boys off screen. JJ and Callux look extremely interested while Tobi smiles at the stupidity of a few of his best friends.

“And what’s Freyas worst quality?” He asks continuing on with his questions. “Scary” Talia says as if it was the easiest answer in the world. She said it rather quickly as well. She wasn’t wrong though. I chuckle putting my left hand into my hoodie pocket while my right hand loops around my leg holding it in its upward position.

“Bitch!” JJ suddenly yells gaining the attention of everybody. My eyes widen slightly as he starts to laugh. What the hell just happened. “Oi you just called her a bitch” Simon exclaims just as shocked as everyone else. “Ah nah nah nah” he says trying to play it off as if it wasn’t what he just said.

“You said bitch!” Simon laughs loving the current drama going on. “They can’t choose just one” Freya smiles making light out of the situation. Talia says “strong-minded” Simon shortly after repeating what she said as if he was re-saying it for the people that didn’t hear it the first time.

“Self-belief” Gee says sort of as a question pointing over me towards Freya. “Her worst quality is that a she has belief in herself” Simon comments knowing that’s not what she meant. These boys I swear. “No!” Gee exclaims Freya deciding to finish Gees word for her “lack of.” “Low” Gee also clarifies wanting to clear the situation as she gestures to the floor.

“Direct” I say Freya turning towards me with a sort of impressed look. Of course being direct isn’t a bad thing but sometimes she can be a little too direct. “That’s a good one” she agrees nodding in my direction. I smile at her before giving her a light thank you to which she nods back at me with a smile.

“Now what’s Y/ns worst quality” Simon asks, me getting a bit more nervous for their answers. I’m not gonna take what they say seriously because it’s just for the video and plus they’ve been my friends for a long time so if what they say is a really big issue then they would have stopped being friends with me a long time ago.

This question gains Tobis attention more than the ones about the others. He’s always been more protective over me considering my past and the hurt I’ve gone through. He sits up in his position immediately putting his phone down. He waits for everyone’s responses making sure to be open just in case he needs to yell or beat someone up.

I’ve always loved him for that. I look towards him giving him a big smile trying to make him feel better. I honestly was feeling fine about this question which is honestly surprising. He relaxes a bit noticing the reassuring smile on my face. He smiles back lightly sitting back still a bit on edge.

“Shy” Talia starts slightly pinching my elbow making me slightly jump at the sudden touch. We both laugh at my reaction. I nod knowing my shyness can get a bit annoying. Even to me. “Indecisive” Freya responds crossing her arms giving me a small glare. I laugh thinking back to the night before when I couldn’t decide where to go out to eat. “Ok look I’m a picky eater I didn’t know what to do” I said laughing at her.

She laughs as well uncrossing her arms. Tobis figure seems to relax more once he sees that I can handle my own and that their words weren’t that bad. Gee goes last saying the one word I agreed with the most “stubborn.” “All very true” I smile looking at the camera.

I once again turn towards Tobi seeing his body now in the same position it was before when he was laying down. I smile at him getting a smile back before turning back to Simon that was searching his phone again.

“What’s my worst quality?” Simon asks us girls already knowing the big word. “Feet” Gee suddenly says pointing downwards at his feet that currently did not have socks or shoes on. We laugh at his slightly offended face when he suddenly speaks up trying to defend them “they are not bad!”

He then lifts his leg shoving his foot up to the camera lens showing off his bare foot to anyone that’s gonna watch this video when it’s posted. Talia cringes as everyone else laughs at his actions.

“Wait.” I start before taking a small pause. “Your showing your feet for free?” I ask in a shocking yet funny way making my face as serious as possible. Loud laughs start to come from everyone in the room as Simon lowers his leg laughing as well. “Oh my god Y/n” he laughs massaging his forehead with his fingers.

“I just covered Freya” Simon says motioning to the camera. Freya laughs shaking her head. “I think we can all say it at the same time” Talia comments looking between Freya, Gee and I. Nodding to each other we all collectively say “stubborn” while Gee agrees with us by saying “yup.”

“Come on Gee” Simon says with disapproval on his face. “What?” She asks scrunching her brows a bit in confusion. “You were meant to stick with feet” he comments pointing towards his feet again. “Yeah feet” Gee agrees pointing to his feet as well.

Remembering I had a fidget ring on my left middle finger I start to mess around with it making some of the anxiety still in my body leave.

“Recently Callux went and sold Harry’s bath water” Simon darts before pausing to look at the camera. Wow this is such a great start to a question.

“It’s on his channel” he stops keeping his eyes on the camera for a quick few seconds. His attention turns back to his phone as he reads off the next question. “How much would I have to pay you to drink that bath water?” He asks Callux quickly intervening saying “he rubbed his balls and stuff as well.”

I don’t know why he felt the need to add that detail. It didn’t make the situation better in any way. My nose scrunches in disgust at the thought. God I did not want to think of that. Although it’s disgusting, money is money. I’d drink it even for a hundred dollars. Hear me out, I know that’s gross but think about it. It’s just a drink. Once it’s in your stomach it’s just gonna come out of you anyway. I don’t really see a big deal in it.

Talia makes a face that says ‘absolutely not’ while Simon laughs. “Like proper like” Callux finishes trying to make it known. “If that doesn’t sell you I don’t know what will” Simon comments on Cals words making me laugh. “What is this an auction” I ask throwing my arms in the air.

Simon laughs pointing a finger gun at the camera making me cringe. “It’s not bad” Freya starts. “A hundred” she finishes shrugging casually. “Freya!” Gee yells sitting up in her seat as Talia tries to get her to change her mind. “It’s not like it’s gonna stay in your body. It’s gonna come out eventually so I don’t really see the big issue” I say sticking up for what Freya said. Talia looks at me with disgust in her eyes. “Not you too” she gags looking back to Simon.

I shrug still trying to think of a price. “Shut up” Gee says trying to get us to stop. “Yeah Freya nods still not seeing the big deal. “She said a hundred” Simon points slightly up in an alarmed way. “A hundred quid?” JJ asks off screen trying to make sure she didn’t actually mean a hundred.

Tobi looks at me slightly alarmed as well a frown etching across his mouth showing his dissatisfaction. I laugh at him shoving my head behind my leg that is still up on my chair.

“There was stuff in there!” Talia yells trying to reason with Freya. “I don’t think it’s that deep” Freya says me agreeing with her statement. Gee snaps her fingers in Freya direction as Callux starts to speak.

“It was probably about that level” he says creating a level with his hands. I laugh at him realizing that he thought she meant the level of the bath water. “That’s just gross man” Tobi comments shaking his head. “Ya I agree but like Freya said it’s not that deep” I say trying to get people to understand me and Freyas side of the story. Freya points towards me nodding her head.

“I’m changing my Freya and Y/ns worst quality answers” Talia says earning a laugh from everyone. “Mad tings” JJ says honeslty shocked but still laughing. “Callux is about to have a follow up video” Simon laughs picturing it in his head. “Million” Talia says.

“I don’t think it’s that deep” Freya says getting a ‘really’ look back from Simon. “That is just ridiculous” Freya says not thinking it’s a big deal. “How much to drink Josh’s piss?” JJ asks obviously trying to prove a point. My mouth forms an ‘o’ at the gross comment.

“Bro that’s so different than bath water” Tobi counters sitting a little bit more up. Gee laughs while Talia shakes her head moving her hand side to side under her chin.

“Complelty different” Freya says Talia saying “nothing” right after basically saying that they don’t even compare. “What’s different? It is pretty much the same thing?” JJ says honestly confused. “It’s not” Talia says sorta annoyed.

“Jj piss and bath water are two very different things” I say my face showing disgust. I continue to mess with my ring out of habit. “One word! One word” Simon yells holding an arm up. “Harry probably peed in there” JJ says sitting up from laying down trying to continue his point.

“What do you do in your bath?” Talia yells honestly grossed out. “One word! One word!” Simon laughs pointing a finger at Talia. “20k” Freya says not really knowing an answer.

“Okay” Simon says looking up from his phone. “I’m the only one that saw it. You need to see that before you make your prices” Talia says disgusted slightly sitting back in her chair. “A million?” Simon asks Talia who answers back “a million” frowning in disgust.

“10k” I say going for something reasonable but not easy. “10k” gee says nodding and pointing to Freya. Moving onto the next question Simon continues. “You walk into a bedroom and you see vikstar naked” he finishes looking up for our answers.

Without a second thought I quickly respond with “leave” getting a laugh from Tobi which makes me smile. “Lucky” Freya says making Simon confused. Talia and Gee laugh. “Okay?” Simon says more as a question.

“Joke. Joke” Freya says looking into the camera. Talia says something but I don’t really know what she said becuase Freya quickly asks “why?”

“It’s his bedroom you walk into viks bedroom and he’s there naked and it’s completely just.” Simon finishes pointing his hand to the floor.

“Leave” I repeat shrugging my shoulders. “You’d just leave?” Simon asks. “Well yeah” I say pointing to tobi. “Not only I have a boyfriend but I also don’t want to see genitals of another person” I say trying not to sound mean. Simon laughs nodding his head.

“Fair play” JJ sighs scrolling on his phone. “Hey, I would just say hey” Freya says making everyone chuckle. “Hey? Vikstar is standing naked in front of you and you just go hey” Simon says casually saying ‘hey’ while shrugging his shoulders.

“Ayo what’s wrong with vik?” JJ asks as if we said he’s gross. “I’m not dating vik” Talia says. Pointing to her I agree. “He’s a good looking guy right?” JJ asks.

In the corner of my eye while JJs talking I see Freya stick up her pinky finger wiggling it around. I point to her and laugh throwing my head back in the process.

“Did you?” Simon asks his sentence falling out. “Wait bro. Bro. What?!” JJ exclaims making me laugh harder. Freya tried to play it off by asking “what.” Gee and Talia are confused while Simon is shocked.

I’m laughing my ass off. Thats shit was to funny. “Woah! Zoom in on that” JJ says looking to the camera. Tobis eyes are wide not knowing what he just saw Callux having the same expression as Simon. “Joke!” Freya says laughing afterwards.

I finally calm down rubbing my face with my hoodie sleeve. Well if I’m being honest it’s Tobis hoodie that I stole. “You’re not in the scenario, she just walked in” Simon chuckles to jj pointing to us. “What is your reaction” Simon asks wanting everyone else’s answers.

Talia starts by saying “oops” and Gee follows saying “fair” raising her arms in a duh manner. “I mean yeah, you’d be like mm, fair I’d supposed I’d just walk into your room” Talia says. Simon looks at his phone again searching for another question.

“Describe yourselves in one word” Simon says looking at us. Gee starts by saying “bubbly.” I go next saying “anxious” because it’s the truth. Talia says “irritating” in a serious tone making Gee “oh”. “Annoying” Freya says nodding at her answer.

That round went rather quickly. “Who has the most feminine boyfriend?” He asks looking up from the question. “Oh Gee” Talia says laughing. Gee nods accepting fate. “Me” she confidently says making me laugh.

He doesn’t even need me and Freyas answers to the question so he moves on. Suddenly JJ sits up into frame next to Simon making my anxiety rise. Oh fuck here we go. “We got one from the audience” Simon pauses as all of us girls groan knowing it’s gonna be some bullshit question.

“This may not make it in” Simon laughs. “Whose farts would you smell among all of you” JJ asks looking at his phone. Gee quickly answers “Freya” while Talia shrugs saying “my own. Me.” I agree with her which makes Gee “oh.” She didn’t think about herself.

Everyone laughs knowing she didn’t realize. “Gees” Freya says placing a heart warming hand to her heart making Gee “yay” while clapping. “If you could smash one of the other boyfriends, who would it be?” Callux asks now coming into frame where JJ just was.

“No” Talia says while he’s speaking then again after he’s done. “Just saying there’s a top link up for grabs” Simon says clearing his throat then laughing. Freya looks at me, Talia, and Gee.

“Yeah we already know” Talia and Freya say at the same time making us girls start laughing. Simon turns to JJ slightly worried. “They already know” Simon tells JJ who says “oh god” back. We continue laughing before Talia speaks “no one obviously.”

She brushes her hair out of her face seriousness lacing her tone. “No one” Freya agrees looking back at the couch. “I don’t like how girls talk” Simon says getting a laugh from JJ. Suddenly a risky idea pops up into my head causing a smile to form on my face. “Simon” I say very calmly knowing that there’s a catch.

Everyone looks at me shocked while I just smirk at the camera. I turn to Tobi seeing his facial expression show hurt and shock. I’ve never seen him like that. I couldn’t help but immediately feel bad.

Before anyone starts to actually believe what I said I clarify my answer. “I bet I could smash him in super smash bros” I say immediately hearing everyone’s relieved laughter. Tobi still looks shocked but relieved. He gets up from the couch and walks to the camera so that he’s on screen.

“I don’t know what just happened but it scared the shit out of me” he tells the camera making me laugh out of pity. “Sorry babe” I apologize pouting my lip out a bit. He goes back and sits down everyone’s laughter slowly going down. “That was good” Callux says patting Tobis shoulder who gives him a small glare before chuckling a bit himself. “Next question” Freya says smiling very wide.

“Ah ah I’ve got a good one” JJ says sitting up in frame again. “No” Talia says drawing out the ‘o’. “Oh my god. You see him just jump into shot.” Simon smiles looking at his phone JJ out of frame again. “Who would you snogg out of all of you?” JJ asks making me cringe at his words. What is with him and the weird questions?

Heat slightly rises to my cheeks making them a very light pink. “Pervert” Freya says pointing to JJ. Everyone laughs Me, Gee and Talia all agree on choosing Freya. “Prove it” JJ says laughing at his own comment. “Ok!” Talia yells getting a laugh from me.

“Ok ok you were right pervert!” Simon yells pointing an accusing finger at JJ. He laughs shoving Simons shoulder so that he’s slightly falling into the couch a bit. “Talia” Freya says making me nod. “Wow” Simon says looking at me and Gee.

“I don’t care” I say Gee agreeing with me. “If the worlds gonna end in Five minutes, what would you do?” Simon asks looking away from his phone. “I would just get naked and just go like run around. I obviously would” Freya says JJ shortly after saying “what?” “Join” gee says pointing to Freya.

“I was about to say join in” Talia says nodding. “So you’re saying if the world was gonna end in five minutes you were sat doing this interview you’d just get naked?” Simon clarifies trying to make sure that’s what they meant. “Yeah” Freya says. “Josh you hear that?” Simon says looking into the camera with a smile plastered on his face.

“We’re gonna die” Freya explains as Simon dead stares the camera. “Y/n?” He asks. “Love” I say knowing I’ll need to clarify. Simon looks at me confused which gives me the word that I do need to explain. “Tell everyone I love them” I explain getting a few ‘ohs’ of realization. “That’s sweet” Gee says patting my knee.

I nod putting my hood up on my head. I pick at the rips in my jeans slightly nervous still. My anxiety was a bit high today and I didn’t really know why. I lean my head on my knee waiting for the next question. “What’s your favorite type of porn” Simon asks casually. My face gets even hotter turning my cheeks red.

Like I said before. I’m not the sexual type of person. Anytime it’s brought up I get extremely nervous and embarrassed. It’s just a reaction I have. Don’t get me wrong I do have a sex drive just like everyone else, but I don’t necessarily feel the need to have sex.

“Oh my god” I mumble pulling the strings to my hoodie so my face is covered. “Hardcore” Talia says naturally Gee following with “lesbian” and Freya confidently saying “massage.” They all chuckle at the speed of their answers. “Woah” JJ says not expecting the quick response.

“These were rapid” lux comments. Still haven’t given an answer I look through my hoodie seeing everyone’s eyes on me. “I hate this” I nervously laugh seeing Tobi staring directly at me. I can tell he’s interested in what I have to say.

It was getting to the point in our relationship that I fealt comfortable enough for him to know these things. Maybe I was even ready to give him everything I have to offer.

A sudden surge of confidence hits me making me undo the strings of the hood. “f/p/t” I say slightly smirking in Tobis direction knowing he’ll get some sort of kick out of this. “Ooh!” JJ says making me laugh slightly. “We haven’t had an answer quicker than that” Simon says as me and the girls hide our faces.

I look up to see Tobi smirking back at me with a small look of surprise hidden in his eyes. I slyly wink at him making sure that no one else saw but him. He looks away from me a small pink tint making its way to his face. JJ laughs shaking Tobis shoulder who laughs with him. “Hardcore. Fam?” JJ asks fist bumping Simon. “Damn!”.

“Did you just fist bump?” Talia starts before turning serious “dad I’m sorry” she says laughing. “Damn!” JJ says again a bit louder this time.

I look up from my knee seeing him get up into frame again. Oh no. I sigh shaking my head. “Favorite position?” JJ asks silence filling the room for a bit. “Cowgirl.. reverse” Freya says Callux high-fiving her. “I’ll see you there” he says making everyone laugh and Freya hide her face.

“Cant wait to watch” Jj says making me groan in discomfort. Gross. “Doggy. I don’t know” Gee laughs Talia agreeing. They look at me to which I answer with a confidence I never thought I would have. “f/p.”

“Ayy!” JJ says patting Simon and Tobi on the back. Tobi swats his hand away smirking while Simon bends over embarrassed. “This isn’t fair for us” Talia says pointing to me and her, me quickly agreeing. “Ayy!” JJ says louder as Simon looks pink in the face.

“Hardcore doggy yeah” JJ says making everyone laugh and Talia now being the one embarrassed. Gee fans her face while everyone tried to control themselves. “Well that was a ridiculously intimate um.. one word interview-”.

“Yeah” gee cuts him off before he continues.“As I said, all four links are in the description down below” Simon says Gee putting an arm around me making me smile. “Ay yo- ay yo! Fam wassup man?” JJ, Callux, and Tobi complain.

“Alright um well their links are much higher up then if you scroll quite a bit down theres another three links down there you can check out” Simon says as JJ, Callux and Tobi high-five in achievement.

“Umm.. thanks for being in this” he says making me laugh. “They weren’t even supposed to be here” he points to the other guys. “Thanks for watching. Peace” Simon says saluting the camera.

Letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding I get up from my seat walking over to Tobi. Who’s happily looking up at me from the couch. He’s currently laying on the couch like he has been the entire video. I immediately place myself next to him, cuddling into him.

He laughs chest vibrating against my body as I lean more into his side. He kisses the top of my head wrapping his strong arms around my shoulders. “No PDA” Simon yells laughing after he says it.

“Shut the hell up Simon” I groan as everyone in the room laughs. “I’m exhausted” I whine looking up at Tobi who was already looking down at me with a smile gracing his lips. “Just relax” he says pulling me closer to him.

I start to relax in his touch when I feel his head get closer to my ear his breath fanning over my face causing goosebumps to rise on my skin.

“We’ll talk about those two answers later” he says making sure his voice is in a seductive yet calm tone. I blush shoving my head more into his chest making him chuckle.

God I love this man.

________________________________________

A/n: I hope anyone that read this enjoyed it. I enjoyed writing it. It took me a long time to get this written and published. Luckily I had a snow day at school today so that I could easily finish it. Thank you and I hope you guys enjoyed it!

If anyone has a request for an imagine or head cannon etc. please contact me about it :)

[runariya]

I finished reading why they broke up or just one of the reasons for it and tbh she’s right. why would I change myself for you just because you wanna have some fun or do something that’s not i would do and let me feel like im the one who’s at fault for not doing what you want? why drag me into it? do it with your friends or mother but why me? i mean yes both of them didn’t communicate and what not but the fact that she says no and HE acts hurt is selfish ass hell. why be hurt by something a person doesn’t want to do? you literally got to know her as a calm person so why change her to your standards? also him shutting her up and sleeping with her just to not talk about it but then leave her in the middle of the night is fucked up too. no wonder she broke up and im glad she did.

„you calm me it’s like i don’t have to keep running“ that was a lie.

I hope you all don’t mind me not doing another drabble from his POV for this one, bc omg idk how I’d explain his whole thought process regarding this ask lol

Okay, so first, in her POV you’re absolutely right, and I feel you! That exact emotion you’ve got is ultimately what led her to break up with him.

BUT (!) I need to explain why he’s not the villain here too (tho it’s just my take on things, you’re free to hate whichever character you want lol)

Quick timeline for better understanding:

They met when they were just shy of 19

Dated when they were 20

Camping and breakup at 24

See each other again/main CCL at 27

Yes, he knew who she was, and while she went along with most minor things, he never thought he was pushing her boundaries this far, key word: communication on her side. This drabble shows solely the end of their relationship, where she, for the first time, explicitly said no to him. At the start of the drabble, she was still saying things like ‘I can’t do this with you’, blah blah, not rly voices out why. But regardless to this, he was oblivious to her inner thoughts and the extent of her doubts. (I’m not bashing OC, I’m just too lazy to look up her exact words)

Him shutting her up the way he did to stop her doubting herself by showing her that everything’s okay, and that she’s still his dream girl, isn’t that bad in my opinion either. He’s a man, a physical one, and that’s his way of showing his love to her. But after all this time where she’s stuck in her head, it just doesn’t hit the mark, key word: his communication skills.

He wants to share his adventures with her, not some friends, so on that front alone, it’s not rly that bad either.

As for his ‘hurt,’ I think it’s human. I’m thinking about all the times I’ve wanted to go shopping and my husband said no, or when he wanted to watch a game at the stadium and I said no. Both of us were hurt or disappointed at first, but you get over it quickly, like rly rly quickly tho the other one’s still feeling guilty for saying no. So OC was in her head too much again bc they weren’t talking (more verbal reassurance from JK throughout the whole relationship would’ve helped maybe)

And yes, she did calm him bc (I don’t want to write a short lousy 100-word drabble about this), he didn’t actually go into the cave when he got there. He thought about what he was doing, regretted it, and realised OC was right. He wasn’t sure if she was rly asleep when he came back, but didn’t think much of it until she broke up with him, and that’s when it clicked. She knew about the cave thing, and that’s why he connected it during the breakup (it’s mentioned that he regrets it in drabble II)

I hope I managed to explain his side clearly without taking sides again lol bc honestly, I just can’t…they were both a mess and still are, but we’re getting there!

Hope I didn’t ruin the fic now 👀

TYSM for this ask, it got my brain working overtime but I loved it! 💕

[wxntedman]

i saw that you said writing about incest was insensitive to victims, so i thought i’d sort of give my piece. my name’s em, i write incest (on occasion), and i’m a victim of repeated sa via a family member.

to start off, i get it. incest is objectively a revolting topic. when i was 18, i probably would’ve felt the same way. i understand how you’re feeling, and i understand why you’re confused, too.

i can’t afford therapy. i work two jobs and live with a chronic illness whilst studying psychology. but i’ve been: and genuinely, while i was there, it didn’t really change anything. they suggest to go on walks, to listen to music… that doesn’t undo what happened, for me. maybe i’ll try it out again when i can fork over $100 every two weeks. but for now, i can’t.

i don’t have an incest kink. i think back to any of my actual experience and my hands start shaking. i don’t really get off to writing it; it’s more of a detachment thing. i don’t associate incest and sa with my abuser when i interact with it via fanfiction; it’s in my hands, not his. i have control in a situation related to another where i had none. that’s the best way i can describe it. i post because i’ve had a lot of readers dm me or send me asks regarding being a victim of the same thing, and thanking me for helping them.

you’re totally fine to disagree with people writing it, and i really mean no offense to you: i just request that you don’t really come for us. a lot of us are just writers trying to cope. i know it’s jarring, i know it’s odd: but we’re generally harmless. people just don’t respond too well when called disgusting. when these waves of hate come about, i get these big waves of personal hate, too — stuff encouraging me to hurt or starve myself (for context, i have anorexia), stuff telling me that getting sa’d was my fault or that they hope it happens again, the whole nine yards. callouts don’t actually get anyone to stop posting — it’s usually just harassment to the same victims people say they’re supporting.

i hope this sort of clarified stuff. i’m bad with words on occasion. i just wanted to explain & maybe come to some sort of middle ground, lol. if you have any questions i’d be more than happy to elaborate on anything: i just ask that we keep stuff civil & respectful.

hi em!

thank you for sharing what you went through, one I just want to say you're incredibly brave and strong for going through that.

I am also a victim of it, which is why it's so sensitive for me. for ab 12 years by a family member, daily.

I hear your points, I just also think maybe there's some things that don't need to be on the internet, and I think the way people post this content really does come off as glamorizing it or fantasizing about it. I don't agree with you getting death threats or harmful threats of any sort, if that's what you use to cope then fair. I write stuff for myself all the time to cope, but I keep it to myself.

The whole topic just makes me very uncomfortable with how people approach it. I guess I genuinely don't understand how people could get comfort over writing their favorite character s/a them or doing incest with them. Maybe that's a me thing, but I felt I was sering this topic so much, I'd hate to see a topic like this be normalized because incest is NOT normal at all.