#I hope someone beats me senseless

[roi-kii]

I’m tired of misunderstandings. I hate knowing that someone else sees something entirely different than what I do. I understand that nothing is really objective in this world and yet I can’t stand it when I stumble across someone who believes something different than I do. Why can’t I see what they can? Why is it that others agree with them and I just can’t?

Why do I feel as though I’m always in the minority? Why do I feel like I’m being fooled constantly? I wish I could kill this person I’ve become.

[hellfireeddiemunson]

i just wanted to come to walmart real fast with my sister and then go home and get drunk but our dad decided to come with us and now we’ve already been here 40 minutes and done essentially Nothing bc my dad is just Looking at camping shit

[andersonfilms]

i think some skin to skin with cowgirl abby could and would fix me :P

❝ IM IN LOVE WITH YOU ❞ ✶ ABBY ANDERSON!

an. nonnie, thank you for the request. it's more angst than i planned so i hope that's okay! i also wanna credit the cuntress queen @astralnymphh for this concept. so, so good. y'all need to check it out asap.

Since she could feel it, from very early on, she’s liked women and never enjoyed the company of men other than to have an occasional beer with. Most of the girls around her worried about settling down, finding a perfect man, one who is respectable, stable, loving. Pleasing the wishes of their parents who are ever so demanding with a downpour of insured judgements. 

It’s all left to be found here, the bellows from a man and a woman living unhappily together, telling others how to live their life. Yet, Abby from a young age yearns for someone else, the piece she believes is missin’. 

The sought after, happily ever after. 

Not a soul she had met for her bill so she keeps her head down. Late night escapades are tight lipped, hidden from spectator’s eyes, ones they would throw slurs her way without a second thought if they knew. Just like they had when she hadn’t kept it a secret.

 Sometimes, it burns. Other times when she was buried in between a woman’s thighs as they cried for mercy in her ear, it didn’t. 

Underneath the midnight sky, her fingertips dance on the white wood — the one she shouldn’t be stepping her boots back on. 

Despite how she tells herself, this will be the last time, it never really is. It’s a quiet night in the small town tucked away in a small town in South Texas, the stars shine bright in the countryside, moonlight shining brighter than it has all month long. 

Abby steps up to your front porch, the pearly white picket fence, the home your dad built with his two bare hands and a dream. When she’s met with your shining smile, the doubt is evident, barely visible but it’s there. 

Is this what you want? Or were you just too kind of a woman to say no? 

Nothing is said between the two of you as you pull her into your home, a senseless wonder swirls in your eyes, getting lost in impenetrable blues. Maybe, it’s what pulls you in and keeps you there like the failed dreams in a dying town. Perhaps it’s when you dream of the sound of her voice at night when she decides not to come, leaving you alone to think of not a single thing but her. 

Once the door closes, it’s just the two of you. Abby’s musk is overwhelming, she tends to be, but you seem to welcome it with open arms. There's a pot roast you made for her, devouring it silently at the round dining room table, her muscular thigh touching yours, reminding you of the feelings which never seem to wither. 

Her brown, weathered stetson hat sits on the empty chair, her fingertips picking at the frayed edge, the nagging thought in her brain shouts at her to say something, anything, but you beat her to it. 

“You don’t have to stay, Abby. You’ve got an early morning, so do I.” You pick up the emptied plates, washing them at the sink when you feel strong, protective, arms wrap around your waist, her chin resting against your shoulder. 

“Why are you putting words in my mouth, darling?” Pink lips decorate deliberate kisses along the side of your neck, “I’m right where I wanna be. M’here with you, not going anywhere.” 

With her pointer finger, she tilts your head to her, dominant lips catching hers, Abby’s hold keeping you in place as she reminds you of what it feels like to be held by the person you call home. The quivering feeling shoots a shiver up your spine, her hands don’t stop moving as they caress your body. 

“C’mon now, you need some sleep.” Her southern drawl is strong as ever as she leads you up the stairs into your bedroom. “S’late, can’t have you not gettin’ sleep because of little ‘ole me.” 

You know what she wants and you know you’ll do it too. 

Anything for her. Right? 

A freshly showered Abby emerges as naked as the day she was born. Porcelain skin tanned by the radiance of the sun from a hard day’s work, a constellation of freckles cover her body. There’s an abundance collecting at her shoulders, across her collarbones as they dust her strong nose and spread across perfectly sculpted cheeks. 

The time you have with each other is few and far in between, occupied by the responsibilities of managing a ranch with her father commands most of the hours of the day, keeping her effectively away from you.

Plus, the feeling swarming in her heart she refuses to see yet she’s here a few times a week, wanting this. If Abby wants more, she’s good at hiding it, but the thought alone is dangerous. You can allow yourself to want more, not when she gives you nothing in return. 

“Are you gonna come over here, gorgeous?” She slides in between your legs, some of her weight soothingly collapses onto you. “Patience darling, m’right here, not going anywhere.” 

With a sigh of content, she grabs you by the waist as she pulls you on top of her with ease. Abby’s golden waves kiss your face as she hides her face in the crook of her neck. Meticulously, the blunt of her fingertips draw patterns on your skin, playing with the hem on your lace undergarment, the only piece of clothing left in your body. 

“You will go somewhere. In the morning, you’ll leave without saying goodbye. Jus’ like you do after every night.” Abby tightens her hold, thinking if she keeps you close you won't slip through but truth be told? She’d be the first to drop you, even if it wasn't her intention. 

“Sorry, m’not strong like you.” 

“I think you’re a lot stronger than you think, y’know?” Her lips find yours as her skin smothers you in the body wash she keeps in the cabinet. Soft breasts melt against her own, calming her in a way Abby can’t quite comprehend. 

This was more than just sex. If that’s all this was, she would be the nearest bar picking up the closeted women who fawn over her before she even steps her foot in the front door. The most sought after woman in town, yet it’s her tongue in your mouth, claiming in a way words fail her. 

“Abby—” The moan vibrates through her, she falls into the sensation of your heavenly skin, smooth against her calloused hands. Every inch of your body feels golden to her. It’s what she craves, the intimacy without having to be, so good, a delicate sigh leaves her puffy lips. “I—” 

With a loving look in her wondrous pools of deep sea blues, with a hint of gray stowed away beneath the light, she inquires for you to continue as she looks up at you. 

Your hands gently touch her face, thumb lovingly soothing over the apples of her cheeks and the scar decorating one of them. There’s nothing she despises more than it, makes her look far too damaged, but you’ve always thought it makes her the person she is. 

Strong, loving, imperfectly perfect. 

The first time you did it, she flinched as she gripped your wrist, pulling your fingers away from marking. Now, she closes her eyes and lets you. 

“When can I tell you without you running? When are you gonna stay?” Abby wants to tell you, say it. I won’t leave. I’ll always be here, right with you, forever. 

She doesn’t. She can’t. 

The words die on her tongue, the three little ones she feels but can’t let through. The past hurts haunt her as it disgusts itself as a never ending hangover which she holds it against you. It’s not meant to be cruel, it certainly isn’t fair, but it’s all she can do until time heals the festering wound. 

“I don’t have an answer for you—” Her blue eyes open, her lips ghosting over your again. “But, this, you? It’s just you and me. No one else, darling.” 

For now, it’s enough, but Abby stresses over the day where you’ve had enough cursing at the wind and whatever god sits above. 

One day, somewhere in the near future, she won’t be.

taglist: @plutolovesyou @brackishkittie @nybueckers @tlouloser

wanna be tagged?

[cosmictheo]

𝐎𝐁𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐘 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐒 | 𝐟𝐞𝐲𝐝-𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐚 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐧

(gif credits to @pascow)

— summary: feyd-rautha was used to have whatever he wanted, it was well known, but so were you; what you desired, was already yours. and what you crave right now, is him. —pairing: feyd-rautha harkonnen x female!reader —word count: 1.5k —warnings: death, mentions of killing, blood, fighting (yk the usual feyd), just the reader and feyd-rautha being horny and a slut for each other.

writer’s note: english is not my mother tongue, so please forgive me if there is a grammatical error. hope you like it!

yes, i'm finally back!! dune part 2 has dragged me out of my cave and has given me inspiration like never before.

Feyd-Rautha was psychotic. Everyone knew it, perhaps the whole galaxy was aware of his very eccentric... preferences and appetites. He was well known for his immaculate and animalistic way of fighting, of destroying anyone who dared to present themselves as his enemy, of anyone who would dare to challenge him. But he was also honorable, proud and loyal to his beliefs, perhaps too self-confident for your own liking.

But every strong man had a weakness, a weakness that could bring them to their knees, to yield, to be left vulnerable. You were Feyd's weakness, rather, his strength, his fortitude, the fire in his veins, the beating of his heart. And it was quite strange and utterly unimaginable to think that someone like Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen would have any feelings at all, there were those who firmly believed that he didn't even have a heart, not even a soul, that he was a demon in human form, a ruthless and bloodthirsty beast, the worst of the worst.

But there you were to prove otherwise.

It had been your idea to actually take him as a husband. Your parents disagreed, of course, for they thought you would be better off alone, after all, you were one of the strongest women alive, you didn't need any man or woman by your side. They called you the Golden Dragon, someone with too much power for this world, you had abilities that the world could not really understand yet, connections with the universe that could not even begin to be explained, the last descendant of one of the most ancient Houses, one that had vanished in time, detached from battles and senseless wars for power, a House that was recognized by that flag with the roaring and menacing red dragon on a golden field. That ancient beast that many thought extinct... until you came to Giedi Prime riding one. 

And you had arrived just on his coming of age day, where his favorite ceremony was battles, of course.

You watched him fight the Atreides men from your seat, your mother and father sitting at your sides, watching him as well, all in silence. Your eyes followed his every move, not even pausing for a second to watch the other poor men being annihilated, no, for your attention was solely on Feyd-Rautha, noting the predatory nature of his steps, his precise and powerful movements, eyes darkened with delight, eager for more death and blood. 

"He is a good warrior" Your father commented looking at him in awe as well.

"Too much so, I'd say" Your mother added in a naturally stern voice, distrustful dark eyes, observing the gory spectacle.

"He was born for it" Your father continued to comment, turning his head so he could look at you for a few seconds "For slaughter and death. Only to bring that."

"I think he's cute" you finally stated your opinion, voice low and serene, not even having the audacity to look at your parents, for you didn't have to look at them to know that they were both giving you horrified and scandalized looks now. 

Your father muttered your name in a warning tone of voice.

"He would look good in our home. He's built for fighting and protect, just like us." You explained, finally detaching your eyes from Feyd-Rautha, who had just killed the last Atreides standing, unleashing a wave of applause, praise and cheers from the audience. "Don't you think so, father?"

Your look was almost defiant, and yet composed, and your father took it as a challenge, but he would never be so foolish as to show any disagreement with you, for what the dragon princess desired, she had.

So, after sharing a short glance with your mother, he gave you a short nod of his head.

"I do."

And so it was settled.

Feyd-Rautha, for his own part, saw you and knew you were meant to be his.  He had heard of you, of course, his uncle used to insist that he must behave himself once your family arrived, for you were worthy of having the full respect of House Harkonnen, and that losing you as allies was not an option at all. So behave he did... or at least he tried to.

"I dreamed of you last night." 

Was the first thing he said to you, both found in one of the large, dark halls of his home, just a couple of hours after his victorious fight in the arena. The Baron and your father were in an important and pending meeting in which neither your presence nor Feyd's was required, because the whole focus of it was the two of you, and a possible marriage to ensure the alliance and heritage.

His eyes were barely distinguishable with the all the thick blackness surrounding him, his pupils dilated with desire, hands clasped behind his back, as inflexible as ever. He had put his all into making a good impression, his uncle had ordered him to, and Feyd was quite obedient when it came to the Baron's wishes. He was so loyal to that foul man that you thought it was something no better described than adorable. 

The thing was that, as powerful and menacing as he was, he was just another man, another pawn into this colossal game of power and thrones. And you felt rather pity for him.

"Na-baron." You greeted him somewhat pragmatically, turning fully towards him, golden eyes gleaming even amidst all the darkness through your gold mask. "It was a good dream, I hope."

"(Y/N) Pazuk, princess." He just took the satisfaction of deliciously savoring the name of your House, pronouncing it in that husky, deep voice of his. He also had the courage to move closer to you, rising from the wall and stepping cautiously, holding your gaze, looking down on you as if you were prey, a small helpless animal under his looming shadow. He then reflected, thinking about choosing the most suitable words... and the most appropriate ones "It was a very good dream."

You were in his territory, his planet, you knew it well and so did he, you were walking straight into the mouth of the hungry beast. Everything that was there belonged to him, he controlled it all and saw it all. 

And everything he was seeing now was you. And he was intrigued, captivated even. Because he usually encountered boring and vulgar people, people who were nowhere near his level, people who he liked to torture and make bleed to death. And the thing was, you happened to stand on his level, and even higher.

"Tell me more." You had the courage to order him in a soft tone of voice. He knew instantly that you were testing him, he was smart and knew how to read people well... but you, you were different, he could see it too, you were much more complex than other people. And he was delighted.

A hint of a phantom smile tugged at the corner of his lips just as he stood in front of you, posture rigid and dominant. "You showed me the way. The right way. The way of victory, the way of life."

You swallowed spit slowly and he noticed it, for his eyes descended to your throat for a few moments before rising again to your face, analyzing every expression that passed through your gaze, every gesture of your lips, every sign you allowed him to see.

Then he twisted his head slightly, face turning somewhat mischievous. "You think I'm scary, princess?"

Now it was his turn to test you.

He watched as your lips parted before responding, raising your voice with pure confidence, naturally, holding his dark gaze. "I think you're quite the opposite really, Feyd-Rautha."

He was silent for a few moments, long moments in which he simply gazed at you intently, with his full attention on you, on your body, almost as if he was looking at your pure soul.

"You are my destiny." He finally uttered, you could hear how his voice had wavered more for softness than harshness this time. "Show me the way, my princess."

You managed to feel the warmth of his body against yours. For someone so cold and distant, his body was hot and warm like fire.

"Are you going to ask for my hand?" You ask in a small voice, feeling suddenly intimidated by his closeness. There were very few who dared to stand so close to you, yet there he was, threatening your personal space. "Because here I am, na-Baron."

Before I could answer you anything, you spoke again, twisting your head slightly, barely narrowing your eyes. "You think I'm scary, my lord?"

He had never been so profoundly proud and thrilled by his title as he was at that moment, when you slowly modulated it with your tongue like a purr, your voice tastefully savoring it.

"I think you are beautiful." He immediately responded. "And I want you to be mine."

And so, fate had done it's work.

[touchtheinvisiblestars]

Imagine Benny when you come to him for help

"Ben?" You call out, rapping your knuckles on the door frame. You held your other arm flush to your chest, trying to ignore the searing pain coming from your shoulder.

Knocking on the door again. You didn't know if he was home or out with the guys. You just knew where his house was and that you needed help.

"Hang on a damn minute!" He yelled from inside. Clearly irritated at the disturbance at such a late hour. You breathed a sigh of relief that he was home.

"Benny please let me in." You called, glancing out into the night behind you.

"Y/N?" His heavy footsteps picked up in speed and he yanked open the door.

Practically barging past him, you stumble into the entrance way of the house.

"I'm so sorry Ben. I didn't have anywhere else to go?"

"How about a hospital? What the fuck happened to you." He looked you over, taking note of the cuts on your face and the way you held your arm.

"Don't want to talk about it."

"Fair enough. Why did you come here? Frankies' is closest to you."

"You told me I could come here if I needed to. For safety."

"Yeah but that was about- oh. Wait he did this to you?" The realisation dawned on him and he felt a wave of anger roll over him.

"I'm sorry. I just needed to get away from him, and he doesn't know where you live. Among other reasons. I would have gone to Frankie but Sam's not even a month old yet, and you don't have a baby."

"He's looking for you? To what? Have another go at beating you senseless."

"His exact words were a little more colourful and descriptive."

"Right... You need to sit down so I can clean you up. And then start over and tell me exactly what happened."

You took a seat on the very comfortable sofa. Perching yourself on the edge of the cushion. Not wanting to stain them with any dirt or blood.

Benny came back with his well stocked first aid kit. Constantly in use from his training and fighting injuries.

"Start from the top. I'm all ears." Benny prompted you as he took a seat on the footstool and started taking out some antiseptic wipes.

"There really isn't all that much to explain. I came home from work. Showered and the next thing I know he's on me like I've just told him I fucked someone in our bed. Which I hadn't by the way. Apparently some of his buddies saw me at your fight yesterday. Made up something about it and played into his jealousy about it. Nothing I could say way going to make it better."

"Fuckin' knew it. I told Will this would happen. Tell me you're not going back to him."

"Do I look brain damaged Ben? I'm not the girl that going to 'fix' him. The second he put his hands on me I was done. There's no going back from this."

A comfortable silence followed, only cut by the occasional sharp intake of breath from you as Benny cleaned you up.

"Good. 'Kay, I've cleaned up that busted eyebrow and your lip. You're lucky you don't need stitches for your hand. Can you move your shoulder or are taking a trip to the ER?"

"Ben I can't afford it. But it fuckin' hurts. I can move my wrist?" You offered, hoping it was helpful information.

Letting out a sigh, he placed down the cloth he had, "Ive fixed a fair few dislocated shoulders but if it's broken were going to have to. Can I see?"

You nodded, shifting to face him side on. He moved your hoodie to the side and his fingers prodded along you collarbone. Whimpering as he got to a particularly sore spot.

"What's the verdict nurse Miller?" You teased.

"I don't think it's broken, how this that happen exactly."

"He uh, kicked it."

Ben let out a puff of air, signaling his disgust, but continued feeling along your shoulder, "yep that's dislocated. I can put it back but I need to do it properly and quickly."

You nodded, Benny moved so he was sat behind you. Wrapping an arm around yours, he took hold of your upper arm. "Okay, what do I need to do, can you give me-"

With a sickening pop, he jolted your shoulder back into place. Letting out a horror movie worthy scream. You lurched away from him and blinked at him in shock.

"I'm sorry. It's best to just do it, warning makes it worse."

"Holy shit, that fucking hurt." You puffed out breaths of air trying to slow your heart. "But thank you."

"Try not to move it too much."

"Okay. Ben I'm sorry for just turning up here."

"None of that thank you very much. I'm just flattered you felt safe enough to come to me. I meant what I said."

"Of course I feel safe with you. You've always looked after me like I'm yours."

There was a tense silence for a moment after that as you both started at each other. Ben cleared his throat and shifted himself off the sofa.

"I'm going to grab you some painkillers. I bet you're starting to ache now."

He was right, you felt like you'd been put through a hydraulic press six different ways. Returning with a glass and a hand outstretched with a few pills in it. You gratefully took them. Downing the pills and the water easily.

"If you just drugged me I'm going to be so mad."

He let out a chuckle, "come on. If I was like that I wouldn't have wasted a good first aid kit on you. That shits expensive."

"The way you go through them yeah I bet they are." You both chuckled at the thought.

"Okay I sho-" You started to say but we're cut off by the sound a car pulling up and the engine turning off.

You heard a car door close outside. Making you freeze.

"Go upstairs now. Don't come back down until I say it's clear." Benny whisper shouted. He quickly tidied up the first aid kit and shoved it under a blanket on the sofa.

"Now!" He urged you when you didn't move.

Jumping into action you, ran upstairs, hovering on the landing.

Four sharp thumps to the front door had your blood running cold. How the fuck had he found you here?

"Will? What the hell do you want this late?"

"Is Y/N here?"

"Why?"

"I'll take that as a yes then."

"It's okay Y/N it's just Will." Benny called up to you.

Tentatively you came back downstairs. Seeing the two brothers stood side by side.

When Will locked eyes on you, he strode over and pulled you into a hug. He had always been the less affectionate of the two. So it surprised you as he rubbed your back.

"Thank god you're okay. He's been down the bar bragging about what he did to you."

"What? She's lucky she didn't have to go to the hospital." Benny seethed, "man I really want to go down there."

"Bet he missed out some bits. He was cradling his balls as I ran off."

The two of them snorted in unison, "you better have."

"Of course I did. He wouldn't have stopped. Fucker was trying to kill me."

"Well he's never gonna get the chance to again." Benny affirmed, gritting his teeth.

[fullsandwichmiracle]

Eavesdropping

Paring: Joost Klein x female!reader 

Description: Y/N was sitting with her friend at a lively party, the room buzzing with conversation and laughter. With a mischievous glint in her eye, she leaned in close, sharing some intimate details about her fantasies involving Joost.

Warnings: 18+, MDNI, weed, smut, PnV, unprotected, Joost being a bit rough, rpf

Word count: 3k+

Sorry for the delay in posting—work and school have kept me busy. But here’s a new one inspired by today's Reading Reddit Stories. I am working on some request, so more is coming.

The house was alive with music, laughter, and the buzz of a summer party in full swing. People moved from room to room, drinks in hand, chatting, dancing, and letting loose. Joost had been floating around, engaging in small talk and enjoying the atmosphere, but after a while, he needed a break from the noise. The house was big, with plenty of rooms that offered a quiet escape. He slipped into a side room, which looked like a small study, hoping to find a moment of peace.

The study was dimly lit, the only light coming from a small lamp on the desk in the corner. Joost shut the door behind him, but it didn’t latch completely, leaving it slightly ajar. He sank into the leather chair by the window, the faint hum of the party outside muffled by the walls. He let out a sigh and opened the window, took out and lit a joint, finally relaxing as he let the distant music fade into the background. 

But soon, voices from the hallway outside caught his attention. They were familiar—Y/N and Liz, giggling and tipsy from a night of fun. He couldn’t help but smile to himself, but when he heard his name mentioned, his ears perked up.

"I’m telling you, Liz," Y/N said, her voice laced with that playful edge she got after a few drinks. "If Joost knew what I really wanted from him… well, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to look at me the same way again."

Joost’s heart skipped a beat. He sat up a little straighter, suddenly very interested in what was being said. He knew eavesdropping was wrong, but his curiosity got the better of him.

"Oh, do tell!" Liz encouraged, her voice bubbly with excitement. "What kind of dirty little thoughts have you been hiding?"

Y/N let out a low, almost wicked laugh. "You know, the kind where he’s not just the sweet, nice guy everyone thinks he is. I keep imagining what it’d be like if he just… snapped, you know? Like, I want him to lose all that control and just take me wherever we are. Like, right here at this party, against a wall, or maybe even on the floor… not caring who’s around or who might hear us."

Joost felt a shock of electricity run through him. Her words were so unexpected, so raw and vivid, that they hit him like a truck. He shifted in his seat, the leather creaking slightly under him. The idea of Y/N—fun, witty, and someone he had secretly admired—fantasizing about him like that was enough to make his head spin.

Liz gasped, then let out a laugh that was almost scandalized. "Y/N! I didn’t know you had it in you! That’s… wow, okay, that’s hot. But honestly, I think he’d be down for it if he knew."

Y/N snorted and laughed. "Yeah, sure. Like I’m just going to walk up to him and tell him I fantasize about him choking me while he's fucking me senseless."

Joost’s heart was pounding in his chest, the air around him suddenly feeling too warm. Before he could fully process what he was doing, he walked up to the door frame to be able to hear the conversation more clearly, causing the door to creak loudly.

Both Y/N and Liz fell silent. Liz, always the sharp one, noticed the slightly ajar door immediately. Her eyes widened as she nudged Y/N, pointing toward the study. "Oh my god, Y/N…"

Y/N turned slowly, her heart dropping to her stomach as she saw the door, and through the small crack, Joost’s unmistakable silhouette. Her face flushed a deep red as she realized he must have heard everything. Liz was biting her lip, trying not to burst out laughing, her eyes darting between Joost and Y/N, reveling in the unfolding drama.

Joost stepped into the doorway, his face caught somewhere between a grin and something darker, more intense. His eyes locked onto Y/N’s, a glint of mischief playing in them. "So," he started, his voice low and teasing, "I couldn’t help but overhear something about losing control and taking you… right here?"

Y/N’s mouth went dry, her usual quick wit abandoning her as she stared at him, wide-eyed. "I… I was just joking around," she stammered, though the words didn’t carry much conviction. She could feel the heat in her cheeks, the alcohol in her system making her feel even more vulnerable under his gaze.

Joost took a slow, deliberate step closer, the air between them thick with tension. "Were you?" he asked, his voice a seductive murmur that made her shiver. "Because if that’s really what you want, I’m more than willing to make it happen."

Liz, barely able to contain herself, let out a laugh that she quickly tried to stifle. "Oh my god, you guys," she giggled, taking a step back. "I’m just gonna… leave you two to it. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do." With a playful wink, she spun around and disappeared into the throng of partygoers, leaving Joost and Y/N alone.

Y/N couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol, the heat of the moment, or the way Joost was looking at her with those intense, dark eyes, but she felt herself leaning into the tension rather than shying away from it. "I didn’t think you’d actually… want to," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

Joost was standing so close now that she could feel the warmth radiating off him. He reached out, brushing a strand of hair away from her face, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through her. "I’ve wanted to for a long time," he confessed, his voice rough with desire. "But now that I know what you’ve been thinking… I don’t think I can hold back."

Y/N’s breath hitched, and before she could second-guess herself, she grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him down to her level. "Then don’t," she whispered against his lips.

That was all the encouragement Joost needed. With a low growl, he crushed his lips to hers, the kiss hungry and demanding, all the pent-up tension between them finally exploding. His hands slid down her sides, gripping her hips as he pushed her back against the wall, the bass of the music vibrating through them both.

Y/N responded eagerly, her hands tangling in his hair as she kissed him back with equal fervor. The party, the world outside that moment faded into nothing as they lost themselves in each other. Joost’s lips left hers, trailing down her neck, his breath hot against her skin. "Tell me," he murmured between kisses, his voice thick with need. "Tell me what else you’ve been imagining."

Y/N gasped as his teeth grazed her collarbone, her body arching against him. "I’ve been thinking… about how you’d feel inside me," she confessed breathlessly. "Right here… right now… I want you, Joost. I want you to fuck me so hard that everyone at this party knows exactly what we’re doing."

Joost let out a low, primal sound, a dark grin spreading across his face as he lifted her off the ground, her legs wrapping around his waist. "Then let’s make it a party they won’t forget," he growled, his hands sliding under her dress as he pressed her firmly against the wall.

The heat between them was scorching, their breath mingling as they kissed again, harder, more desperate. The music pulsed in the background, but all Y/N could hear was the rush of blood in her ears, all she could feel was Joost’s hands on her, his body pressed so tightly against hers.

Joost’s mouth was on her ear now, his voice a rough whisper that sent shivers down her spine. "I want to hear you," he commanded, his hand slipping under her panties. "I want to hear you moan my name."

Y/N let out a shaky breath, her head falling back against the wall as she felt his fingers slide inside her. "Joost," she whimpered, her voice high and needy, exactly what he wanted to hear.

He growled in response, his lips finding hers again as he began to move his fingers, his pace relentless. Y/N’s body trembled, her moans growing louder as the pleasure built, their surroundings fading completely into oblivion as they lost themselves in each other.

Outside the room, the party continued, oblivious to the wild, electric scene unfolding just behind the study’s closed door. But neither Joost nor Y/N cared. They were lost in the moment, giving in to the dark, burning desire that had finally come to light, and there was no going back.

Y/N’s senses were overwhelmed as Joost’s touch sent shockwaves through her body. The room around them seemed to pulse with the rhythm of the music outside, but it felt distant, secondary to the intense connection between them. Her back pressed against the wall, she could feel every movement he made, the heat of his body burning through the thin fabric of her dress.

Joost’s lips were relentless, trailing fiery kisses along her neck, his stubble scraping against her skin in a way that made her shiver with anticipation. He wasn’t just kissing her; he was claiming her, marking her as his in a way that felt primal and raw. His hand slipped further down, gripping her thigh as he lifted her leg higher around his waist, opening her up to him even more.

"God, Y/N," Joost breathed against her skin, his voice rough with need. "You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this, how many nights I’ve thought about what it would be like to have you like this."

His confession sent a thrill through her, knowing that he had been harboring the same desires she had tried to push down for so long. "Then don’t stop," she urged, her voice breathy and desperate. "Show me, Joost."

Joost’s eyes darkened, a fierce determination taking over as he reached down, his fingers deftly working to free himself from the constraints of his jeans. The air between them was thick with tension, every second stretched out as he positioned himself at her entrance, his gaze locked onto hers with an intensity that made her heart race.

"Tell me how much you want this," Joost demanded, his voice low and commanding. "I want to hear you say it."

Y/N’s breath hitched, her body trembling with anticipation. "I want it, Joost," she whispered, her voice trembling with raw need. "I want you to fuck me right here, right now. I need you."

With a growl of satisfaction, Joost thrust into her, burying himself to the hilt in one swift motion. The suddenness of it drew a gasp from Y/N’s lips, her nails digging into his shoulders as she clung to him, overwhelmed by the sheer force of his desire. He was everywhere—inside her, around her—his presence consuming every part of her being.

Joost set a punishing rhythm, each thrust sending shockwaves of pleasure through her body, the sound of skin against skin filling the small room. Y/N’s moans grew louder, uninhibited, as she surrendered to the sensations coursing through her. She didn’t care who might hear them, didn’t care about anything except the way Joost made her feel like she was on fire, like she was unraveling beneath him.

His hands gripped her hips, pulling her closer, deeper, as if he couldn’t get enough of her. "You feel so fucking good," Joost groaned, his voice rough and filled with raw hunger. "I’m not going to stop until I hear you scream my name."

Y/N’s head fell back against the wall, her mouth open in a silent cry of pleasure as Joost’s words drove her further to the brink. The tension inside her tightened with every thrust, every touch, building up to a nearly unbearable intensity. Joost’s hand moved to her neck, applying a firm, possessive pressure that sent shivers through her body.

"Joost," she gasped, her voice breaking as the pleasure became too much to bear. "I’m… I’m so close…"

Joost let out a deep growl, his movements becoming more urgent, his grip on her tightening as he pushed Y/N closer to the edge. "Come for me, Y/N," he demanded, his voice rough and commanding. "I want to feel you come around me."

Those words sent her over the edge. Y/N's body arched against him as her climax tore through her, a cry of pure ecstasy escaping her lips as waves of pleasure overwhelmed her, leaving her breathless and trembling in his arms.

But Joost wasn't finished. His grip tightened as he thrust deeper, his breath hot against her neck. "I'm not done with you yet," he growled, his voice a dark promise that sent shivers down her spine.

Y/N's breath caught in her throat as Joost’s words hung in the air, their intensity reigniting the fire between them. Her body was still quivering from the overwhelming orgasm that had just crashed through her, but the dark, insatiable hunger in Joost’s eyes told her he wasn’t even close to being done.

Without warning, Joost tightened his grip on her hips, his fingers digging into her flesh with a bruising force that sent a jolt of anticipation through her. He pulled back just enough to lock eyes with her, his gaze burning with a raw, primal desire that made her heart race. There was no tenderness in his touch now, only a ruthless determination to claim every part of her.

“You think you’ve had enough?” Joost’s voice was a dark, growling rasp, filled with unrestrained hunger. “I’m not stopping until every last person at this party hears you scream my name.”

Before Y/N could respond, Joost captured her mouth in a bruising kiss, his lips punishing and unyielding as he devoured her. There was no gentleness, only the desperate, violent need to dominate, to possess her completely. His hand fisted in her hair, pulling her head back as he ravaged her mouth, his teeth grazing her bottom lip with enough force to make her gasp.

His hips slammed into hers with brutal force, each thrust deep and merciless, driving her against the wall with a rhythm that was anything but slow. Y/N’s nails dug into his back, leaving angry red welts as she clung to him, overwhelmed by the intensity. The pain only fueled her desire, her body arching into him as she lost herself in the raw, animalistic need he unleashed in her.

The room around them was filled with the harsh sounds of their coupling—her gasps and moans, his growls of satisfaction, the sharp slap of skin against skin as Joost pounded into her with unrelenting force. The tension between them tightened, coiling like a spring ready to snap as Joost drove her closer and closer to the edge.

“Joost…” Y/N’s voice was breathless, trembling with a mix of exhaustion and desperate need, but before she could finish, Joost silenced her with another punishing kiss, his tongue invading her mouth with a ferocity that left her dizzy.

“I’m not stopping until I know you can’t take any more,” he growled against her lips, his pace quickening, his grip on her hips so tight she knew she’d wear his marks for days.

She was completely at his mercy, her body a live wire of sensation as he drove her toward another explosive climax.

Y/N could feel the tension in her body reaching a breaking point, every muscle coiled tight as Joost’s thrusts became even more brutal, more demanding. And then, with a final, devastating thrust, Y/N shattered around him, her orgasm ripping through her with a violence that left her screaming his name.

Joost’s own release was swift and fierce, a guttural growl tearing from his throat as he buried himself deep inside her, the intensity of their shared climax leaving them both trembling, breathless, and utterly spent.

For a long moment, they stayed like that, bodies entwined, their hearts pounding in sync as they rode the waves of their shared ecstasy. Joost held her close, his forehead resting against hers as they fought to catch their breath, the air between them thick with the remnants of their desire.

Finally, Joost pulled back, his eyes still dark and intense as they locked onto Y/N’s. A slow, satisfied smile curled his lips, his voice hoarse and rough as he murmured, “Anything like you imagine?”

Y/N returned his smile, her body still humming with the aftershocks of their raw, intense connection. “Even better,” she whispered, her fingers tracing the sharp lines of his jaw, her touch gentle in contrast to the ferocity of what they’d just shared.

Joost chuckled darkly, pressing a rough kiss to her forehead before he slowly lowered her back to the ground, his hands lingering on her waist as if reluctant to let her go. 

They stayed like that for a moment, lost in the intimacy of the aftermath, the sounds of the party still faint in the background but no longer a part of their world. It was just the two of them, wrapped in the warmth of each other’s arms, the tension that had been building between them for so long finally released.

But as the reality of what had just happened began to settle in, Y/N couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound a mix of relief and disbelief. "I can’t believe we just did that," she said, her voice still breathless, her fingers tracing patterns on his chest.

Joost grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he nuzzled her neck. "Believe it," he murmured, his lips brushing against her skin. "And just so you know, this isn’t a one-time thing. Now that I know what you want, I’m going to make sure you get it… again and again."

Y/N shivered at the promise in his voice, her body already responding to the idea of more, of Joost taking her in every way she had ever fantasized about. "Ohh please do," she whispered back, her lips finding his in a slow, lingering kiss that held the promise of everything that was to come.

As they finally untangled themselves, the party outside still raging on, they knew that everything had changed between them. They had crossed a line, broken through the barriers that had kept them apart for so long, and now there was no going back.

And neither of them wanted to.

[jewish-vents]

I was adopted by Jewish people and converted to Judaism when I was a teenager. The morality Judaism offers has guided me through navigating my personality disorder, my severe alexithymia, my impaired judgment and my bouts of irrational paranoia. My original family lost custody of me because they beat me senseless, starved me, burned me, broke my bones and actually killed my sister by beating her to death. My girlfriend, a goy, texted me images of alleged victims of the IDF that a single reverse Google image search would have showed her are victims of US military intervention in Syria. And she honestly said, "Sometimes I think it would be better if you hadn't been adopted so you weren't technically sort of part of Israel."

I've never been to Israel but I have been up all night and now, as the dawn breaks, I've come to the conclusion I need to cut her out of my life. My whole life I've struggled with outbursts of anger, it's a part of most Cluster B personality disorders. When she said that I wasn't angry. I felt hollowed out. It feels like she ripped the personhood out of me. Because if you care about a person's well-being, you would never, EVER look at them and go, "I think it would be better if you had stayed with literal child murderers rather than be Jewish, which I am going to conflate not just with Israel but with the image of the IDF spread online". I can't be angry because it's so cruel I can't wrap my mind around it. It seems unreal. I kept checking for hours, convinced I must be having a break from reality because of the stress. I kept thinking it must be a visual hallucination. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up and this is going to be a very strange dream.

I know breaking up with her is going to hurt her very badly no matter how nicely I do it. We've been dating a very long time. But I want to have kids someday and I can't do it with a woman who would rather I be dead than be Jewish. I'm not a guy who does the whole "my partner's beliefs have to match mine" thing but I can't raise Jewish children with her. I can't even trust her to see me clearly.

It's taking everything in my power not to say anything to her until I can calm down enough to approach this from a stable place. In my entire life, I don't think a single thing someone has said has ever messed me up so profoundly in my life.

I'm sorry I'm rambling. I can feel that I'm all over the place. Feel free not to publish this if it's too long. I can't imagine how much stress running this blog is. You probably get a bunch of hate and garbage on top of the already hard job of reading everyone's pain. I hope you're taking care of yourself. Thank you for running this blog.

I'm so sorry for all of that. I think you're making the right decision to cut her out. It's very reasonable to worry about how she might treat any children you have in the future, but that was also an indefensibly cruel thing to say to you.

Breaking up might hurt her, but that isn't your fault. You need to take care of yourself. -🐞

[fineghkst]

Cards

summary: azriel shows you exactly what you will miss if you break up with him.

warnings: minors don’t interact (only 18+); smut; break up sex; oral receiving; shadow play

english if not my first language so let me know if you find any mistakes

It has been hours since you decided to break up with Azriel. When you finally said the words to the spymaster and he looked at you with an indescribable expression.

Things between you weren't going so well lately. He was absent, always busy with the missions Rhysand sent him. Azriel suddenly didn’t have more time for you. He wasn’t there at your birthday, wasn’t with you when you finally beat Cassian at during a competition of a card game you were addicted to and, of course, he forgot about your anniversary.

You tried to understand that he was working too much, tried to talk to Azriel and solve everything, but it wasn’t enough. Even if you didn’t want to let him go, you couldn’t date someone who practically wasn’t a part of your life anymore.

So you ended it and felt your heart explode in a million pieces while you stared at his expression turn into something desperate. He’s eyes becoming more tired than you thought it was possible, like his pain were leaking from them.

Countless thoughts crossed your mind before finally talking to him. What would be his reaction? How would you act around each other after the break up? Would he fight for you?

None of them came close to guessing this would happen.

After the discussion you started, with him questioning what he could possibly do to change your mind, he found himself defeated. You had made your decision.

Of course, the attraction you felt for Azriel always seemed to overcome barriers of logic. At some point a thought passed through your mind that maybe you could be mates, but the bond never snapped.

To be honest, if someone asked how Azriel ended between your legs, you wouldn’t know how to explain.

Even with a concrete decision made, of course Azriel would play dirty, showing exactly what you’d miss if you weren’t together.

— Are you enjoying this, love? — Azriel said, finally stopping his tongue from moving on your core. He had his arms around your legs, holding you open for him — I hope you are, because this is the last time you will ever feel me.

A senseless moan left your mouth, disapproving that he stopped to eat your pussy and was talking such things.

Azriel laughed, leaving a small hickey on your tights.

— Hm… since you made your mind and there’s nothing to convince you to come back to me, I bet you thought about this part, right? Never touching me again…

His shadows started to surround your skin, lightly stroking your legs like a ghost touch.

— Never feeling my shadows playing with you… — You whimpered with the thought. No one would ever know how to touch you like he does. — What’s wrong, love? Didn’t you prepare yourself for that?

Azriel moved away from your legs and the shadows grabbed them, replacing Azriel’s hands. He stared at you with something… primal in his eyes. His huge wings half opened and his defined muscles showing. Cauldron, Azriel was so beautiful that you felt like your brain was severely damaged to even think about breaking up with him.

— If you don’t want me anymore, why you’re so wet? Why did you agree so fast to have a last fuck with me? — The spymaster said, still staring you while his shadows begun to stimulate your clit. You could see the possessiveness in his look.

— Azriel… please — A moan escaped your mouth.

— Please what, love?

— Just… just fuck me.

— Why should I do that? — He chuckled.

— I need you, Az. Please. I don’t want to leave you.

— So you’re changing your mind this quick? But you looked so committed to your decision earlier… that’s a shame.

His shadows accelerated the movements, taking you to heaven and back. You were so close to having an orgasm that it was impossible to form a congruent thought.

— S-stop punishing me. — You whined

— Again, I don’t see any reason to — Azriel had a smirk on his face. He was playing with you until you become completely desperate for him, with your brain almost completely empty and the only thing left was his name.

Azriel was succeeding in his goal and he knew it.

— Unless you give me one good reason, love — The smirk turned into a grin. Azriel keep observing his shadows stimulating you, which were moving faster now — Because, honestly, you don’t deserve to have me inside you.

You tried to reply, but it was too much. His shadows were taking you beyond your limits, slithering against your clit. Only incoherent moans left your mouth. It didn’t take long for finally reaching an orgasm.

Azriel never had let you cum with his shadows, he always stopped them and ended the job himself. However, today, the spymaster were playing all his cards, showing exactly how much pleasure he could give you.

Even if Azriel still wearing his pants, you could see the huge painful bonner he had. But he kept his distance, watching you squirm with his fierce eyes. Anyone could say how much he was craving for you, how he wanted to fuck you senseless.

— So… do you have a good argument for me, love?

— I-I…

— I’m listening.

— I just want to feel like you truly desire me, Az — You confessed, trying to normalize your breathing. The shadows loosen the grip around your thighs.

Azriel stared at you, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

— What to you mean, love? You really think I don’t want you?

— You barely have time for me, for us. I understand you’re working a lot since the end of the war with Hybern, but I need you to see me, Az. — You pulled the sheets, covering your body.

— I’m sorry, love. — He said, finally breaking the distance between you two and supporting his arms between your body, firming his hands on the sheets. Azriel’s face was so close from yours, allowing you to feel his breath against it — I didn’t realize I was making you feel like this. But I need to be clear: I will always want you and see you. I desire, crave for you so hard that sometimes I can swear I’m going insane. Let me prove it that I’m mean it, princess.

Giving him a small hesitant nod, feeling your insecurities dissipate slowly, Azriel kissed you deeply as his hands took the sheets away from your body, letting you complete exposed to him. His hard cock was pressing against your bare pussy, making you grind. It was impossible not to moan considering how sensitive you were after the orgasm.

— No, princess. Don’t be greedy. — Azriel said, moving away to finally unbutton his pants.

His hard cock jumped out and he didn’t think twice before claiming your mouth again, feeling you whimpering against his tongue while his fingers touched your nipples. With the other hand, Azriel held his cock and pushed inside you.

— Fuck, you always take me so well, princess. — He groaned, increasing his pace — You have no idea how much I missed to feel you around my cock.

He put his shadows back in action, making them play with your nipples. Azriel pinned your wrists beyond your head with one hand, while the other got down to your clit.

— Az — You moaned loud.

— You love when my shadows tease you like that, don’t you? — Your walls started to clutch around his cock. Azriel growled, thrusting deeply — Maybe I let they play with you more from now.

You squirmed with the idea of feeling them guiding you through pleasure.

— Remember, love. I’m the only one who can make you feel like this. — He whispered, approaching his mouth to your ear — And you’re only mine.

Azriel kept moving inside you until you finally felt a wave of pleasure dominate your body. The spymaster didn’t take long to cum inside you, filling your inside.

He stood in and looked to your eyes, both of you breathless.

— I love you. And I’m truly sorry I made you doubt about my feelings — Azriel said, stroking your hair gently as his shadows retreated, caressing your skin before disappearing. The spymaster moved away, giving a small kiss at your forehead.

— I love you too, Az. — You said — I’m sorry I broke up with you. And just to make clear, I don’t want to.

— I deserved it and I’m relieved to know you changed your mind. — Azriel got up and disappeared through the door for a few minutes, coming back with a towel to clean you up. — I won’t let work getting between us anymore, I’m talking to Rhysand tomorrow. He must find a way to solve everything without me.

Azriel lifted the sheets, covering both of you and pushed you to his chest, stroking your hair until you fell asleep.

[just-zy]

Mi Pesadilla

pairing: Wednesday Addams! x Fem Reader!

summary: Wednesday's regretting pushing you away.

A/N: hello! Zy here, I have no idea why I'm entertaining this fascination of mine but alas, here I am. First actual post on my tumblr btw! This is a third pov, but the bold italics are wednesdays pov/thoughts! This is just a drabble! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this tho! (dunno if someone's done this already, this was just a thought of mine, also, I cannot believe I forgot a summary ab this..)

Warnings!: Angsty, implied suic*de/de*th, and my writing skills.

Masterlist

Wednesday felt as though she was in a nightmare. A bad nightmare, perhaps? She felt conflicted, confused and in denial. Where have you gone? She wasn't losing her mind, was she? Maybe because she felt numb. Maybe because of the suffocation she's embracing around her. Too isolated. Too misunderstood.

"Miss Addams. I'd advise you to head to your shared room, now please."

Why was Weems sending me away? Does she not trust I wouldn't faint? I live for the pain of others, she should know better than that already.

"Miss Y/L/N will be assisted to the infirmary. Don't worry further, she'll be alright, go on Miss Addams."

Or, she could feel how Wednesday would act when she had seen you on that death bed, that might be the case she's sending her away. Too vulnerable to even comprehend. She needed to talk to you, so badly. She needed to apologize, to talk it out with you, to tell you.. She had ached for you all these weeks. She didn't mean to push you away, no. She was a coward. A wimp, was what she was. Her never ending pride, her untouchable ego, led her to this.

★

It's been four days, 14 hours and 16 seconds. She doesn't know why she counted, perhaps she had only ached for you more with every passing second. She'd lie through her teeth that she didn't, that she doesn't. But, every night she sprawled on her bed, thinking about you.

Possibly, it could've been your foolish smile keeping her up, keeping her on her toes to the very least. Your complete senseless brain, it could've been your playful banter together, it could've been anything. It just had to lead to you.

Why are you such a complete idiot.

Continuous beeps of the monitor go off. Every beat of those beeps sends a bolt of relief to Wednesday, at least she knows you're breathing. Even so, she'd keep track of how long the beeping goes off. She yearns for your touch, she yearns for you.

"Wake up, you baboon. I'll kill you a second time if you don't... I- ".

I miss you..

Hands well kept on top of her thighs, she made no move to have held your cold, wrinkling hands, what once looked so lively and warm. She needed you back into her life. Her exhales, her rigid breathing, she felt as if she was hyperventilating. Maybe she was meant to be here, with you. As long as it was with you, she made no complaints, no backhanded comments, nothing that would've hurt you. Not anymore. She'll make sure of it.

"W- ..Wednesday?"

She couldn't feel how her eyebrows knitted together, almost as if she couldn't believe you were.. Calling for her, with what seemed to be a cry for help, a cry for her attention, a cry for her touch. Oh, how she caved from the way you called her name like that. Every time you did, she'd curse upon such a feeling you had caused her. Gosh, she loathed loved you.

"I'll kill you if you decide to leave like that again."

"Never again, Mi Pesadilla."

★

A/N: omgg this was pretty rushed. And again, my first ever post in this account. I apologise for the mistakes! 'Mi Pesadilla - My Nightmare'

[lilaccmilk]

I’m mean, I’d love just a good m4m werewolf story, like a big tough dominant werewolf with his subby little boyfriend, I just haven’t seen a ton of m4m stuff so I’d love it, the details can really be whatever you want, as long as you like it, I’ll probably like it

OOOH! YES. I HAVE AN AMAZING IDEA FOR THIS. Hope I lived up to your expectations!

Big tough dominant werewolf and his subby little boyfriend? Yes. Amazing. Except, the big tough werewolf is a nerdy looking guy. And the subby little bf? Yeah he's the tough-looking, jock kinda guy.

In public, the jock is always teasing and troubling the nerd. But behind the closed doors? He's being fucked senseless because of the things he said in front of people.

What's more is this whole thing started when the jock tried to bully the nerd. Now the nerd bullies his cock into the jock. (so romantic)

Some days when the nerd is feeling extra mean, he'll just make the jock sit on his cock for what feels like an eternity, while the jock just lets out needy whimpers and begs the nerd to fuck him with tears in his eyes.

The nerd does listen, except now he's just overstimulating the jock. He's such a menace fr. The jock is begging him to stop now and the nerd just tsks and growls "Weren't you the one begging me to fuck you? Now that I'm actually listening you're refusing? You're such a brat. Don't worry I'll fuck that attitude out of you, love.”

After many orgasms the nerd finally stops and is cuddling him (with his knot inside the jock) and nipping and biting the jock's neck while murmuring sweet nothings.

"You were so good for me love. So pretty *kiss* so tight *lick* you're mine you know that right? All mine." The jock is so deep in subspace that all he can do is lean into the nerd's touch and whimper. After the knot goes down, the nerd cleans both of them and then makes sure the jock is comfortable before falling asleep with him in his arms.

In school, naturally many people try to flirt with the jock, now the nerd has no choice but to leave VERY VISIBLE hickeys on the jock. If someone tries to flirt with the nerd, the jock simply beats them up.

For humans the jock may sure be a top, dominant and intimidating person but for his werewolf boyfriend he's a pillow princess and the subbiest sub ever.

~if you can't tell, I have a thing for subby men whimpering.

[nightlyrequiem]

Hello there requiemmm 💫💫💫

Ive got a new request for u bbg 😈 /p

okay, so, this ones short, but, i hope its descriptive enough?? Idk 😭

(excuse my grammar, english is not my first language)

Valeria X unfairly devoted Reader.

hear me out, -- Reader is a member of Valerias cartel, -- they're in the higher ranks (im talking, one of the very few people that actually know who El Sin Nombre is, type of 'higher rank')

Reader is an absolute devotee. They (platonically, mostly) worship Valeria, cater to her every need, do whatever she'd like, whenever she'd like, no questions asked. Reader doesnt do it out of fear, that much is obvious. They just do it out of both respect and the far lack of both disobedience and a backbone.

Valeria, naturally, appreciates them, -- keeps them close, enjoys their company (mostly, because it feeds her ego, and makes her feel superior, -- in control, and whatnot) so much so, that reader is nearly permanently stuck being, somewhat of a 'personal assistant'.

Reader, being forced to spend all day (and, sometimes night, if Valeria needs some help with something) decides 'eh, why the fuck not' and asks Valeria out on a little hangout, disguised as a small 'meeting' in a coffee shop, that, ultimately, actually goes well, and spirals into a date.

(Date, naturally, ends with beating someone senseless in a dark alley, after they listened in on Readers and Vals conversation, or, .. something. Reader is, most definitely, doing all the damage, being a guard dog of sorts, not wanting Valeria to 'get her hands dirty, from such a small, unimportant man'. Not manner, man.)

Etc etc, girlfriends, lesbianism, boom. Work your magic, im bad at describing genuinly falling inlove.

hope yar doing well!

--Jester

🃏🌀⭐️

Took me eight days but I finally got around to this. Sorry for the wait, Jester 😔 I am doing quite well as of wiritng this, thank you. I hope all is well with you!

This is very loosely connected to the headcanons I did for this idea. I said it once, and I'll say it again; I love the unfairly devoted trope. I’m not sure I captured it too well but 🙌

Tags/Warnings: Violence, WLW, Boss/Employee Relationship

Swans

Many species of birds mate for life. Penguins, corvids, vultures, and most famously: swans. Symbols of love, loyalty, and grace. They are creatures full of love. They're so sensitive that they can die from heartbreak. You stare at Valeria and understand how the swan feels. How it could hopelessly devote itself to another, even at the cost of it's life.

The quiet scratching of a pen fills in the silence. Valeria's brows are furrowed in concentration as she haunches over her desk. You want to remind her to straighten her back, so it doesn't hurt later. Your eyes greedily drink in her profile. The slope of her nose, the curve of her lips, her curtain of black hair slightly obscuring her cheek and eye.

She sighs.

"Get me a drink." She murmurs. You're to your feet immediately. Heading towards the small cabinet containing her alcohol. You've fixed her enough drinks to know what she wants. Your fingers wrap around the neck of a bottle with golden liquid. Pouring it into a small glass, then putting in exactly two small ice cubes.

You carry it over to her desk and set it down in the corner. You slink around behind her. Watching her take a sip. You can't see her face, but you know she's letting the liquid sit in her mouth to savour the taste. She does that with all of her drinks; savours the first sip.

You have no problem getting her drinks. Or doing her paperwork. Or taking a bullet for her. Valeria has been the one constant in your life. She's the only one who has ever noticed you, and you latched onto her like a leech. She fed you crumbs of kindness and that's all it took. It's obsessive and unhealthy but you're long past the stage of caring.

Valeria takes a second sip then goes back to working. Her shoulders look so tense. You want to rub that tension away, but you don't. It's late and you're feeling a little tired, but you'd never say so. You doubt Valeria cares and you don't want to distract her. Besides, she must be tired too. You'll go home when she does. For now, though, you wander back around the desk and sit down in one of the chairs off to the side.

You gaze at Valeria as she works. At some point without even realising it you fall asleep. Your body startles itself awake as that fact worms it's way into your subconscious. You aren't sure how long you've been dozing off for, but Valeria isn't in the room anymore. You sit up with urgency and look around, a small fleece blanket falls from your shoulders.

You furrow your brows, trying to remember if you put it on yourself. You know you didn't. You feel slightly giddy at the thought of Valeria doing it. As if just thinking her name summoned her, Valeria walks into the small office. Despite how tired she is her stride is still intense and confident.

She sits down with a grunt and glances at you.

"Good sleep?" She asks sarcastically.

"How long was I out for?" You murmur. Tugging the blanket into your lap. Valeria's hair is a little messy and you wish you could run your fingers through it. Or a brush. You just want to touch her hair.

"Fifteen minutes." Valeria replies. "You should go home and get some rest."

Fifteen minutes isn't that bad. You don't want to leave just yet though.

"No, I'm okay to stay for longer." You insist. "I could help you finish up the last of those reports."

Valeria shakes her head and when she speaks her voice sounds softer than usual. "You've been staying late for the past few weeks; I know you aren't getting the sleep you need. Go home."

You frown but concede. "Alright." As you're getting up an idea pops into your head. "Hey, could we meet at Ila's tomorrow? I just think I need some extra reminders about where all the trade routes are." You know every route and the exact location of them.

"Okay." Valeria agrees. "5PM."

The next day arrives and you're very impatient for 5PM. You finished all your tasks and went home early. It's not a date. Not to Valeria, but that doesn't mean you aren't going to treat it like one. You've picked out a nice, attractive outfit and touched up your makeup.

You arrived five minutes early and secured a table. Watching as patrons pass by. The smell of baked goods almost tempts you into buying something, but you don't want to eat before Valeria. Ever the punctual person, Valeria walks in through the glass doors at exactly 5PM. She looks very put together, hair brushed and glossy. She's even wearing different clothes.

Valeria sits down across from you and gives you a small smile that sends fireworks throughout your body. You want to trap that smile in a jar like a firefly. Valeria reaches into her bag and pulls out a folded, yellowed map and sets it up on a table. She begins to quietly and intently explain where each route is and where the shipments go.

You nod and hum, pretending to listen. You're much more focused on Valeria's hands as she points at places on the map. Her neatly trimmed pink nails and fingers. Ine of them is slightly crooked from having been broken one too many times. Her skin looks soft and if you try hard enough you can smell her lotion.

"-and this is when we split it into smaller batches to move it across the border."

You point to Mackey Hill.

"Here?" You ask. Already knowing the answer.

"Yes." She nods. You glance up behind her for a split second and watch some scruffy looking man quickly turn away. Immediately you straighten and stare at him. You don't like the vibes he's giving off.

Valeria furrows her brows at you.

"What's wrong?" She asks quietly. You lean closer and whisper back.

"I think that man is eavesdropping."

Valeria turns her head to look at the man, narrowing her eyes. You feel pleased that she trusts your word so strongly.

"Get rid of him." She commands.

You slip out of your spot and approach him. He startles as you lean down and murmur in his ear.

"Follow me. My boss has a proposition for you." You walk towards the doors and cast a look behind you. He's staring at you nervously but eventually rises.

You wait behind the brick wall and wait. Sure enough the man rounds the corner. Looking at you with a mixture of caution and curiosity.

"What was the-" He's cut off by Valeria hitting him in the back of the head. He grunts and falls to his knees. You strike him this time. Kneeing him in the face. He opens his mouth to scream but you cover it before he can.

You drag him deeper into the alley and fish out the small blade hidden in your boot. You make quick work of slitting his throat. He makes an awful gurgling sound before going still. Valeria helps you lift him into the nearby dumpster. Your fingers brush and you look at each other.

You've been loyal to her for years. Since before she even came into power. Through thick and thin you've stuck by her side. You've thrown yourself in harm's way to protect her without thought. You've spent countless hours staring at her intently but now your gaze is being returned tenfold. There's a new fire in those dark inky eyes. One you've only caught glimpses of. But here it is, in all it's blazing glory and it's directed at you. Scorching and all consuming.

His body thumps dully as he falls among the full trash bags but neither of you are paying attention to him anymore.

"Why don't we go get something to eat?" Valeria murmurs softly. "I'm sure you'll have an easier time getting the routes with a full stomach." Her hand creeps towards yours and your fingers tangle with hers. You've done more than feed her ego, you've carved out a place in her heart for yourself.

[rin-fukuroi]

𝐎𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐞… 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 [𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞]

Please do not translate or publish my works without my permission.

The originals of my works can be read here

Fandom: Honkai: Star Rail

Pairings: maid!Blade??? x fem!reader

Warnings: NSFW, oral sex, spanking, cokworming, delaying orgasm.

Note: English is not my native language, so I apologize if there are errors in the text qq

It just so happened that today is my birthday, so I decided to please both you and myself with a little yummy. I may have been on Tumblr not so long ago, but in fact I have been writing for quite a long time and it will never cease to bring me pleasure, so I'm incredibly happy that I can now share my creativity with others. This is the best gift I can imagine ( 〃▽〃) I hope my texts in english are at least a little closer to what I write in the original, and you don't experience discomfort while reading. Bon appetit!<3

— Everything is absolutely honest! We had an argument, or have you already forgotten? — you smile slyly, poking Blade's nose into his sad and bitter defeat.

He clears his throat, seemingly confused, looking at the menacingly red inscription «Defeat» on the screen of his smartphone.

— When did you learn to play so well?

— Ahem! — you're pouting. — How dare you, I always beat you. Well, almost…

— Did you play with the Silver Wolf?

Your lips open before you find something to say. His insight is so annoying sometimes.

— I-it doesn't matter! The main thing is that now you can start fulfilling my wish, as we agreed.

Blade sighs resignedly, throwing the phone on the table and crossing his arms over his chest.

— Just don't be silly.

— Hey! There was no such condition, I can wish anything I want.

Blade's lips pursed, his eyes closed, as he mentally cursed the minute he signed up for this stupid argument.

— Just don't even think about shirking your obligations anymore, justifying yourself by saying that your wounds haven't healed yet. I fell for it once, but it won't work twice! — you pout your lips and put your fists on your sides, giving your offended expression on your face a bit of severity. — So, I want to…

✧ ✧ ✧

— Where did you even get… this?

Blade discontentedly lifts up the hem of a long black dress along with a white apron, looking with disgust at the mesh tights hugging his legs while you are messing around from behind, helping him tighten the black satin bow on his back. You could have chosen anything as punishment, but he couldn't even think that you could ask for something so humiliating as to make him wear that ugly maid dress and tights that make him feel like a whore on call.

— I used to have to work part-time in a maid cafe, — your voice seems to darken from unpleasant memories. — I wanted to throw away this form, but I think I found a better use for it! — only Blade wanted to give you an understanding silence, but instead he lets out another exasperated sigh when you are overflowing with enthusiasm again.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice how Blade lets go of the hem of the dress with displeasure, again hiding his legs from your field of view. In fact, all this time your gaze was riveted to the muscular calves covered with mesh fabric. It seemed to you that… Sexy?

— And now what? — Blade turns around, angrily crossing his arms over his chest and seemingly looking away in embarrassment. If someone else were in your place, this person could have lost his head the second he voiced this humiliating request. But it was you. In fact, he is too greedy for your puppy dog eyes, constantly begging him to commit absolutely senseless follies, to which for some reason he continues to agree.

— Hm-m, actually, I wanted to arrange a real photo shoot for you, so that after sharing this treasure with Kafka and the Wolf! — you're really testing his patience. — But…

You stumble over the words when the image of his sexy legs, perfectly covered with vulgar tights, pops up in your mind again. It's ridiculous even for you. Initially, your request was just a way to tease your amazingly patient lover once again, but now you are desperately trying to fight the heat that treacherously spreads through your body every time you look down, unconsciously continuing to touch his back even when the satin bow has long been tightly tightened, elegantly emphasizing the curve of Blade's waist in an already tight dress. You glance cautiously over his shoulder, noticing how the black fabric hugs his chest, threatening to tear to shreds as soon as he takes a deep breath. However, you've always wondered how his own raincoat holds that muscular chest with the help of two pathetic buttons trembling with tension, but you weren't completely sure if your old uniform could withstand such pressure.

— But? — a low velvety voice, permeated with impatience, pulls you out of your thoughts and seems to bring you out of a deep trance when you notice how your fingers are gently pressed into the fabric of a tight dress.

— Damn, — you sigh softly, sitting down fatally and clinging to the hem of a lush black skirt.

Blade warily turns his head in your direction, watching you straighten up again, pulling the black fabric up to his waist and exposing a humiliating picture hidden under a skirt that he would like to never see again.

— What are you doing? — he wants to turn around and finally put you in your place, hoping that this will accelerate the approach of the long-awaited moment when this stupid outfit will leave his body forever.

But he remains motionless.

As if paralyzed, he sharply exhales air from his lungs when he feels your palms slide up from his shins, lingering on his muscular thighs. Tiny fingers press into tense muscles and Blade feels even more confused and annoyed. You're groping his body so brazenly, making him feel vulnerable, as if he's being blatantly harassed right now.

— I never would have thought that this dress would suit you so well… I'm sorry, I can't help myself, — you say breathlessly, while your fingers continue to possessively squeeze, massage and stroke his thighs through the stretched threads of tights. The tips of your fingers playfully slip under the thin mesh to feel the warmth of his body even more and explore every soft scar covering his legs.

Blade is distraught. Although you have always been the one who clearly dominates him morally in your relationship, physically he has always taken over, controlling everything that happens within your bedroom, and sometimes outside it. And now you've made him numb from the symphony of opposites raging in his chest. He wanted to grab your cheeky wrists and turn around, pressing your body into the wall behind, he wanted to dig into your lips with a rough kiss and remind you that it's his hands that should master every curve of your body, but he also wanted you not to stop.

Blade's chest heaves, threatening to tear the fabric stretched to the limit, as a heavy sigh escapes from his throat. One of your palms abruptly switches to his groin, groping for a surprisingly firm erection. His cock twitches in your palm, and your lips stretch in a smug grin. Blade remains silent, but if you could see his face now, you would be able to capture in your memory the most delightful aggressively embarrassed expression. He is literally shaking from the fact that his body reacts so treacherously to what is happening.

— I feel that you had to like it, but it should have been a punishment, — you rise on your toes to reach his neck, pressing your lips into the throbbing curve, leaving a wet kiss on the skin heated with embarrassment before pulling away.

Blade was almost ready to whine at the way the warmth of your hand left his hard organ, but instead his jaws close and he growls, turning around to you just in time for you to kneel down, climbing under the hem of a full skirt and pulling tights over his legs. He would have almost staggered back if it weren't for the grip of your hands, now pressing into his tight thighs again. Blade's lips open, threatening to pour out on you all the discontent swirling on the tip of his tongue, but he immediately swallows any curse that pops up in his thoughts when the warmth of your mouth envelops his needy cock. You dig into him so greedily, squeezing the throbbing flesh with soft lips, swallowing him deeper and deeper with each new movement of your head, ignoring any vomiting. For some reason, right now, seeing Blade like this, a passionate desire has awakened in you to make him moan sweetly to the wet sounds of your lips sliding over his hard erection.

It's so hard for him to breathe. The thick fabric tightens his chest tightly whenever he holds back another velvet growl escaping from his throat. He's so damn mad at you for making him feel so insecure and pathetic, but your narrow throat squeezes so deliciously around his girth while you recklessly take him whole, desperate to please him, that your persistence even amuses Blade. Right now he just wanted to see your face under that irritatingly long skirt, blocking him from any view of what was happening under it.

— Damn… remember that you brought it to this.

The muscles of his chest are straining to the limit, tearing the fabric that was desperately held to the last, finally allowing him to breathe and move normally. Blade pulls down the hem of your skirt, grabbing you by the hair and forcing you to your feet. His eyes meet yours, blinking in discouragement in response to his fierce gaze, as if you are a little guilty kitten who was picked up by the scruff of the neck.

— It seems to me that this stupid outfit has misled you that you can have any control over me.

— Ho-oh, wasn't it like that when you got turned on just because I squeezed your thighs? — you finally regain your former confidence by fearlessly mocking him. — By the way, although I have never worn these clothes, it was not necessary to tear them! – you look with sadness at the fabric that has parted on his chest, sadly realizing the fact that next time you will not be able to get him to wear this dress again. But your disappointment did not settle in your heart for too long when your gaze fell on the heaving voluminous chest, strewn with scars, which did not cease to cause this sweet heat in the bottom of your stomach, no matter how many times you had not seen it before.

— Shut up. You're going to pay for the fact that I had to wear these disgusting things at all, — Blade literally spits out these words before turning you around to face the wall, still painfully winding your hair around his fist. The air is knocked out of your lungs as soon as your chest and cheek meet a hard surface, and you gasp at the unexpected change of roles.

Your underwear instantly descends to your ankles, and the miniature skirt lifts up, revealing to Blade a view of your ass, the flesh of which instantly turns red from the lashing blow of his heavy palm. You flinch, and a cry of pain bursts from your throat when his blows are repeated over and over again, while his other hand releases your hair just to tinker with the fluffy skirt of a ridiculous suit. You can only hear the rustling of the fabric and the light ringing sound from his earring, swaying with each new blow. Burning with irritation and animal excitement, scarlet eyes notice the shiny moisture flowing down your trembling thighs. You've always been so greedy for any manifestation of his absolute dominance over your body that it's even touching.

The unnerving fabric rolls down on his belt and his hips immediately move forward, forcing you to press into the wall even harder from the delicious feeling of stretching and fullness when his hard cock easily plunges into your insides. Any hint of disobedience leaves your thoughts as soon as his hips begin to whiplash against your ass, forcing you to jump from each painful blow of his penis entering you all the way.

— Next time you'll think twice before forcing me to do something equally humiliating, — hoarse moans come out of Blade's chest as his strong fingers dig into the soft flesh of your ass, holding you in place, tightly pressed against the wall.

You feel the knot at the bottom of your stomach trembling and tightening, bringing you closer to the edge of your pleasure. His cock tirelessly stretches your walls that are contracting around his girth, ruthlessly cutting into the cervix every time his hips move forward, making you feel a hellish mixture of pain and pleasure that drives you crazy. You can almost see the bright light blurring your eyes when his movements suddenly stop with the last deep thrust, leaving his throbbing cock in the depths of your walls spasming in the coming orgasm. The blood is wildly accelerating through the veins that wrap around this divine member, which cruelly stopped all movements, forcing you to feel pleasant pulsations that keep you on the edge of the abyss, but not allowing you to step forward.

— B-Blade, please!.. — you whine, sobbing softly and making pathetic attempts to move your hips, which are immediately stopped by his stone grip on your buttocks.

— What is it? — Blade's voice is laced with annoying complacency. — Are you uncomfortable? Do you want me to continue?

— Yes!

— Then I guess you'll have to ask properly.

His chest rises and falls with each heavy sigh. He can see tears of despair welling up in your eyes as you squirm and squirm in his grip, trying to regain at least a little stimulation.

— P-please…

— What? I didn't hear you.

His heavy palm meets your ass again, pulling a pitiful cry out of your throat. You sob, transparent beads of tears roll down your cheeks.

— What is it? Are you speechless already?

One more blow and then his free palm wraps around your throat, forcing you to tilt your head back to meet his gaze as Blade looms over you, gazing intently at the mixture of despair and pain painted on your face.

— Please, Blade, please! I want so much… I want to cum, please…

The moment of his silence, while he reveled in the way your voice cracked, breaking into sobs, lasted like an eternity.

— Good girl.

You didn't have time to realize that, it seems, Blade finally heard what he wanted, as his hips again set the same ruthless pace, crashing into you at breakneck speed. His earring swayed with a soft tinkle from each sharp push, merging with the sounds of his hoarse growl and your stifled moans of pleasure. Blade could feel your walls squeezing his cock tight again, resisting every violent movement tearing your insides apart. His movements became careless, the rhythm lost, turning into a blind pursuit of his own pleasure.

This sweet feeling overwhelms your body again and your nails are pressed into a hard wall in despair. You could feel his cock swell and shudder inside, and the hoarse growl breaks into quiet moans. With the last careless but hard and rough thrusts, Blade tightens his grip on your buttocks, immediately leaving bruises on your skin under the pads of his fingers before bursting out of your insides, leaving you to spasm around emptiness as an intense orgasm covers you. Your ass, red from blows, as well as the hem of the skirt crumpled on Blade's belt, are splashed with sticky hot streams of sperm. You go limp, kneeling on the floor, when he finally lets go of your throat and hips, catching his breath after his climax.

Both of you are breathing heavily, trying to come to your senses again. You lazily rest your palms against the wall, trying to get to your feet, and finally turn around to Blade. When you came up with such a humiliating punishment for him, you could not even think that you would ever see something as beautiful as what now appeared before your eyes. The sweat-damp strands of Blade's long bangs stuck to his forehead, misty fiery eyes stare at you from under heavy half-closed eyelids, his chest rises and falls in time with his ragged breathing, peeking out of a torn black fabric and a crumpled white apron that has slipped off one of his shoulders, and the skirt is still pulled up at the waist decorated with white spots, exposing to you a view of his semi-hard penis, slightly trembling in his palm, trembling legs and stretched mesh tights, concertina gathered at the level of his ankles. Now you are literally speechless, finding this sight so beautiful that it will forever be imprinted in the subcortex of your memory.

Blade sighs heavily before lazily sinking onto the sofa behind him.

— Now this disgusting costume is finally ruined, what a pity, — his lips slightly stretch in a barely noticeable smile.

His words seem to bring you out of deep hypnosis, bringing you to your senses again. You straighten up, shifting your gaze from his hips to his smug expression on his face.

— It's okay, I'll buy a new one for next time, especially for you!

Someday he'll just strangle you while you're sleeping soundly.

[cloudcountry]

meet him halfway

Genre/Tropes: Unestablished relationship. No notable ones!!

Summary: Kalim catches onto Jamil's little crush on you (it's more than that) and Jamil denies it because there's no way the two of you could ever end together (even though you want to.)

Author's Comments: This is loosely based on the song "I Won't Say I'm in Love" from Hercules. I stared with the intention of Kalim being more insistent (and taking the role of the muses) but then it turned into this.

~~~~~

“Are you packing extra food for the Prefect again?”

Jamil winced at the loud voice as Kalim popped up over his shoulder, watching as he chopped up the meat he was using for Kalim’s lunch.

“No. And don’t say again, I never have. They can feed themselves.” he hissed, brow furrowing as he continued chopping.

“Aww, okay. You just always end up giving them the second box so I thought-”

“I make one for myself, too. Don’t think too much of it.” he said, “I’m only required to make your meals. I do not do such things for the Prefect.”

“Really? Because I thought you liked them!” Kalim responded.

WHAT?

Jamil jumped, whirling around to face him. He couldn’t wipe the annoyed glare off his face as Kalim blinked at him innocently.

How did he figure it out?!

“It’s nothing like that.” he sighed, shaking his head, “I have to make lunch for myself, you know. It has nothing to do with them.”

“Are you sure?” Kalim asked, looking very puzzled, “Because you smile a lot when you talk to them and they’re always in the kitchen with you during our parties instead of hanging out with everyone else. They’ve even told me about how you taught them to cook stuff from our home- Mmph!”

Jamil placed a hand over Kalim’s mouth, effectively cutting off his train of thought. This was bad. If Kalim knew about his feelings for you, there was no telling who else knew. If that annoying octopus from Octavinelle figured it out Jamil would be in a world of trouble.

How irritating.

“Don’t say such senseless things.” he hissed, releasing Kalim, “I have no feelings for the Prefect whatsoever. Has anyone else been talking about this baseless rumor?”

“No…I just thought you might like someone.” Kalim pouted, “I got excited because I like the Prefect and I wanted an excuse to throw parties for them-”

“Well, I don’t. Now go away. I won’t get your lunch prepared at this point.” Jamil shooed him away, knowing full well he would have had his lunch ready regardless.

“Okay! But I invited them over, so if you want to say hi you can!” Kalim beamed, scurrying out of the kitchen before Jamil could yell at him.

Was he serious?! Ugh, now he had to deal with you too.

Jamil rolled his eyes before getting back to work, hoping he could finish his duties before you arrived. If he could get Kalim his lunch and make sure he had all his things and walk Kalim to his class and then get to his without running into you, it would be the ideal morning.

With the way he talked about you, one would think he hated you.

That conclusion would be better than thinking he liked you.

He sped up his pace, not missing a beat as he finished up the two lunchboxes (one of which was totally for him. Giving it to you didn’t even cross his mind, because why in the world would he do that?)

“Jamil?” you called his name, opening the door to the kitchen, “Are you in here?”

“Yes.” he responded, mentally kicking himself for letting you know where he was even though it’d be suspicious to hide from you.

“Hey!” you caught his gaze, beaming as you shut the door behind you, “Is Kalim giving you trouble again? I can get his stuff together for you.”

“It’s fine. I can handle it.” he shot you a smile, hoping that would be enough to end the conversation.

It was you, though. Of course you kept talking.

“Of course you can. I just don’t want to get too stressed out.” you sighed, sounding upset that he hadn’t let you help.

“...If you could help walk Kalim to his next class, that would be a big help.” he mumbled, turning his head towards you for the first time since you came in.

Your face was so happy, the smile on your lips brighter than the overhead lights of the kitchen. Jamil swallowed thickly, face warming at the sight of you.

Pretty.

“Of course I can! I’ll make sure he gets there safe and sound, so you can count on me!” you cheered.

Jamil sighed again, stacking the two boxes. At least this way, both you and Kalim would be out of his hair shortly. He’d be able to fulfill his duties of watching Kalim and get to his class without a headache today because of you.

Besides, it’s not like he wanted to walk around with Kalim.

“Here, take these. They’re for Kalim’s lunch.” Jamil shoved the boxes into your hands, turning away quickly.

“Thank you! I’ll tell him that you’re almost ready to go!” you tucked the boxes into your chest like they were precious gems before exiting the kitchen.

He breathed a sigh of relief, resting against the counter. He didn’t have time for you or your smiles or laughs. He had a duty to Kalim, and he just partially gave that up to get away from you. He wasn’t in his right mind right now at all. Shaking his head, he wrinkled his nose at the feelings swarming around in his chest.

Whatever these feelings were, he couldn’t act on them. He was in no position to devote himself to another when his entire life was to be spent in service of Kalim.

It would be unfair to you to expect you to take his hand if he could only extend it halfway.

(Unbeknownst to him, you’d always been trying to meet him halfway.)

[dorkus-mcdingus]

Played Like a Puppet

Tags: TWST Fem!OC x Platonic!Canon, Stage in Playful Land, Platonic!Rosalie x Gidel Honest/Gino Foulworth

AN: I mainly use the EN localization for some of the dialogue but I use Fellow and Gidel's JP names (I mainly see Ernesto Foulworth and Gino Foulworth being the names they've chosen once Playful Land sank so it's why I don't use it and why Rosalie and the other characters refer to them with their JP names). Also, Gidel admittedly was an interesting character to write since I've never written a mute character before so I really hope I did him justice. 😅

‘If only that talk worked!’ 

Was the resounding thought that rang through everyone's heads as they continued to sit like lifeless, stringless puppets in their cage. While the minutes ticked by, everything seemed hopeless as one by one, a fellow schoolmate got locked up behind the dimly lit stage with them to be sold off for a hefty profit. Or at least that's what their kidnappers were thinking.

‘The money we get from handing you over is gonna put food on our table. You better thank ‘em while you can, Gidel. Y’know, for filling our bellies!’ 

Those words for Rosalie rang an all too familiar tune, annoying enough to make someone's ears start bleeding. Despite the rage, the urge to grab Fellow's cane and beat them senseless with it, deep in the pit of her stomach along with his little exposé on why they're getting kidnapped, her grimace turned to a deep sigh and a frown. 

They were nothing short of desperate with their situation, and heaven only knew how long those two were suffering out on the road. It wasn't smart to have sympathy for a couple of con men, but with them having no home, Fellow's immense jealousy for those lucky enough to get a proper education, and them having to constantly worry about when their next meal will be, that they stopped so low to commit heinous deeds. It's a tale all too familiar with the girl. 

From Grim's frown, to her fluffy tutu, to the dingy wooden floorboards she and her schoolmates were forced to sit on behind the main stage, her eyes couldn't stop wandering around the room even as she tuned out the noise the others were making. 

Although, the sight of the tiny cat beastman caught her eye as he stood close to the cage as if he were guarding it with his life. With the giant mallet clenched tightly in his tiny fists, he would occasionally cast a glare at the prisoners, warning them to keep quiet.

As for the captured boys, some would kill their boredom by talking with each other but just to annoy Fellow while he was taking a long call, Lilia called,

“Marco!” 

They all looked at each other with confusion completely etched on their faces.

“Marco!” 

The call was met by a few minutes of silence until a voice called back,

“Polo!” 

“Ah, kufufu! If I can guess, is that Cater I hear?”

“Ah, you got me Lils!” 

“Hey wait a minute, don't you usually play this game when you're swimming?” Jack asked. 

Jade couldn't help but raise an eyebrow.

“Is that so? What an odd game.” 

“Yeah, you usually play this when you go swimming.” Cater explained. “Although one thing I should mention, you play this with your eyes closed.”

Amidst the annoyed groans and the calls, Rosalie kept her mouth shut as she kept glancing at the little boy playing the role of a prison guard.

“Mrah? Why are ya lookin’ at Gidel, Ro?” Grim whispered. 

Rosalie shot the tubby direbeast a look as she whispered, 

“Keep your eyes open and your mouth shut, Grim.” 

“Hehe, you got a plan or somethin’? That's my henchman!”

“No. In fact I lost all faith that we’ll get out of this alive.” 

“EEEEEEH?! THEN WHY DID YOU TELL ME TO KEEP MY EYES OPEN AND MY MOUTH SHUT?! Geez, Crowley really slammed me with one downer of a henchman!” 

Without a second thought, Gidel was quick to hit the cage in order for him to quiet down.

“I wouldn't go swinging that around all willy nilly little kitty cat.” Leona remarked with his usual smug tone. “You don't wanna damage the goods and get in trouble, do you?” 

Alas for him, the arrogant lion had a point. It was bad enough that the property was getting damaged, but if he were to damage the goods?! Not only would that get Fellow in trouble, he knew he would be upset with him.

There was no doubt that the Night Raven students were unbearably annoying, but much to their dismay, they wereprecious cargo. They're the top of the line puppets complete with powerful magic. In both Rosalie and Grim’s case, she was supposed to be the beast tamer to the gluttonous direbeast and the set couldn't be broken or damaged whatsoever!

Seeing his down turned ears, she looked over to him quietly saying,

“Oi! Oi! Gidel?”

Turning to the girl, he shot her an icy stare and shook his head. He then pointed to the room where Fellow was, pointed to himself, and shook his head once more. 

“Fellow said to not talk to you? Is that what you're saying?”

He nodded. 

“Well why not? I'm just waiting out the time until I become mute and lifeless like a doll, so I thought speaking to you would take my mind off of this.” 

Gidel's ears stood up and his eyes went wide while cocked his head as he raised an eyebrow. Did this girl realize that he couldn't speak? Was she out of her mind?! Still, compared to Grim as well as the rest of these gremlins from Hell, and aside from her heckling his big brother, she was more mild mannered. 

As cautious as he was, he decided to listen to her and answer her questions as best as he could despite the barrier between them. Besides, they weren't going to be free anytime soon, so why not entertain her one last time? 

It started off simple with questions like

“Where are you from?”

“What's your favorite color?”

“How did you meet Fellow?” 

Little things to get to know him better, and in turn, she would answer the same questions about her. Only, she would detail how she met Grim for the first time, never forgetting the fact that he set Kalim's rear on fire along with the rest of the mirror chamber. 

As it turns out, Fellow had been looking after Gidel for as long as he could remember and was the only one that could understand him while others didn't bother trying. No matter what, even despite his difficulty with speaking, his big brother always made him feel included. Even with the kind of life he was dealt with, it was incredibly hard especially since he had trouble reading and writing. Not to mention, he's seen how much this had been affecting Fellow as he didn't have a great education himself so he had to teach him what he can. 

“I see.” Rosalie sighed. “Seems like you two only have each other in this cruel world. I feel a similar sentiment with myself and Grim, as he and I have witnessed all sorts of trouble. Still, much like yourself if anything happened to Fellow, I would be just as heartbroken if anything happened to Grim.” 

Gidel huffed as he stamped his foot hard. He paced the area near her side of the cage, grasping his short and shaggy hair with his sleeve-cloaked hands. He pretended he had a magic wand (or a magical pen) in his hand, waved it in the air and shot it as if he were casting a spell. 

“Wishing you had magic? I'm guessing you're thinking that if you had magic then you could help your brother suffer less.”

He nodded. 

Deep down something in him wished he was bigger and stronger so he could help him more. All he had for protection was the mallet he carried with him everywhere at any time.

“I get that.” Rosalie remarked with a sad smile. “Having power on par with my peers would be a great asset, but being magicless isn't all bad. Although, much like you, I don't know my parents either. Before my brothers left the foster home, we were as close as can be. It's been a long time since I've seen them so I’m a little jealous that you and Fellow have such a strong bond.”

In return, Gidel gave her a smile and a nod. 

“By the way Giddy, how much do you think Grim and I will be worth in your eyes?"

Once more, Gidel's ears perked up while his eyes went wide.

“I'm just curious because for the longest time I never thought I was worth anything. Hell, I just thought that I would be discarded like trash.”

The little boy closed his eyes, mimicking the same thoughtful pose Fellow would often do. He paced the floor before he raised his arms high above his head, then slowly lowered them back to his sides, nodding with a cheeky smirk.

“That much?” 

He smiled, giving another nod as he happily bounced on his toes. 

“You're quite the confident little con man, aren't you? Did you ever hear how much of the cut you two are going to get?”

Pausing for a minute, he took a step back. From what he could remember, their boss had plenty of Thaumarks to give and said it himself, but the way the girl phrased it made his stomach drop. 

‘What is she thinking? What does she know about him?!’

"How do you know your boss isn't lying to you? How do you know that he'll keep his word and make you rich?”

Seeing his eyebrows pinch together, he held his mallet tight, ready to hit the cage again.

How dare she say that! How dare she scare him like that! Last time they worked for him, they made so much money that they didn't have to worry about food for a long time! Why is she insinuating that they're getting screwed over! Fellow sacrificed everything for this! His pride, his blood, sweat, and tears, he would do anything if it meant that he and Gidel could be able to be comfortable and not worry about their next meal anymore! 

Still, the threat didn't deter the girl that was stuck in a ballerina's costume. Instead, she looked him in his bright green eyes, much like how Fellow would calm him down whenever he had a nightmare, and gently said to him,

"I ask because I worry for you both." 

‘What?!’ 

Was all he could think. The sheer amount of confusion was completely plastered on his face as he tried to process what she said. She knew they put her and her schoolmates through this so why was she more worried about them than herself?! Did her head get dropped as a baby or something?!

Unable to make sense of this, he shrugged his shoulders as if he were asking her,

“Why?”

“Because I've been around men like your boss, or more accurately, I've been adopted by people like him. Believe me, it's hell. Either I get called a demon child, I get neglected, or I’m just primped to make them look good when really, they don't care about me at all. In the end when they get bored of me, or they don't feel like taking care of a girl that they adopted as their daughter, I get thrown out like some old toy no one wants to play with anymore.”

The way her eyes didn't waver as she told him her cold and brutal truth, Gidel's eyes grew wide. While she could acknowledge that despite her rough upbringing, she was far more privileged than them. However, that mutual understanding of being a puppet for the wealthy men who don't even give a smidgen of a damn about them, made his ears turn downward. 

At least there was that little bit of common ground between them.

Upon realizing this, Rosalie let out a dry laugh in spite of herself.

"Sounds familiar I suppose. The truth is, I know what it's like to be a puppet for wealthy jackarses like him. They promise you so many wonderful things only for them to play the wolf in sheep's clothing and lie to your face. If your boss truly cared about you, he would do anything if it meant you two are safe and sound. From the sound of how pissed off your brother is, seems like he's the puppet boy in this sort of business transaction. A corporate slave made to dance for the men who look down on you two.” 

As much as he hated to admit it... she had a point. She clocked them just like that. 

The realization made the boy’s heart race and his breathing grow heavy. She and Grim were just like them. A pair of lost souls trying to survive while only having each other in this cruel world. Knowing that she's from another world with no relations in Twisted Wonderland, if not for the headmaster taking her in despite NRC only enrolling men, they would've ended up just like them. Broke, homeless, scraping by so they could afford something to eat, and to add insult to injury, she was a layperson just like him. 

In truth, the thought was more terrifying than any run-in with the police. Someone meeting the same fate as theirs.

With a frown on his face, he looked over his shoulder making sure Fellow was still distracted by the boss ripping him a new one over the phone. Once he was in the clear, he reached inside the cage bars and gently touched her cheek with his eyes slowly blinking at her. 

“Thank you. You're a sweet kid, you know that? Just a shame the world spat you out like you're a piece of rubbish. Oh well, on the bright side, at least I’d be able to help feed you both.” 

The moment they both heard the phone slam and Fellow groaning, completely irritated, Gidel immediately took his hand away from the cage as the fox beastman’s steps drew closer. 

The gaudily dressed park manager fished a cigar and a lighter from his pocket, while the room immediately became cloaked with the smell of smoke the moment he walked in. 

“Mind letting me have a hit from that? I had a rough night.” Rosalie groaned. 

“Heavens, no!” Fellow retorted as he exhaled another puff of smoke. “Also, aren't you a little young to start smoking?”

“I used to steal some of my sister's cigarettes when I was fourteen. They tasted like arse if I’m being honest with you. However tonight, I feel like relapsing into my old habits again if I’m going to be a puppet for the wealthy again just like you are right now.”

As kind as she was, she was harsh with her cutting remarks from her sharp tongue as well as her never-ending sarcasm. It was easy to write her off as a privileged little schoolgirl but who could tell how much hurt she took until she became so jaded.

As far as the NRC scholars were concerned, the fact that she somewhat understood them made the scars hurt so much worse.

After all, it takes a special kind of pain to make such twisted individuals like these nasty little brats.

[acourtofinkandpapyrus]

My Little Shadow: Part two (Azriel X Reader)

Warnings!: Abusive family, toxic relationship, arranged marriage.

Part one here: Part one

Part three

Thank you for all the people who like and re-blogged my last post! I couldn't believe so many people liked my story, so I worked hard to make sure I had the second part out today! Prepare for two shadowsingers to meet. As Y/N and Azriel meet again, is it the beginning of a friendship, or something more?

The past two weeks had been a nightmare, more so than usual.

After returning to my father’s home, he beat me senseless, afterward throwing me into my room and locking it from the outside.

No one had returned to even bring me food, although luckily I had saved some in a hidden spot for times just like this.  I had thought that one day I would need to hide myself, my mother, or my sisters from his wrath.

I would have never imagined this scenario, but I probably should have.

I was his only daughter born before Amarantha’s reign.  He had managed to keep us off her radar, but it had only helped so much.  And then somewhere in there, he decided that he wanted another child.  Seeing no end in sight to our stay under the mountain, he went for it.

Thinking about back then, about what I had done to keep my sisters safe, I clenched my hands, the old scars that ran up my back, legs, and arms hurting again.

I felt a cold hand on my shoulder, attempting to soothe me.

I smiled.  There was one thing they could never take away.

After I had first learned how to speak with the shadows, I had discreetly done as much research as I possibly could.  I knew that different shadows preferred different ways of presenting themselves, and had seen it myself.

But these shadows had followed me from that horrible cell under the mountain, becoming the only one I could trust.  They take the form of a human woman, most likely one they had seen before who wouldn’t be using it anymore.

I couldn’t make out any facial features, and if they stood real still they looked like nothing more than my shadow, but if you looked closely, you might notice how it seems darker than it should, and that when you look at them from a certain angle you noticed that sometimes they were not flat against the wall, but their own entity entirely.

They helped me stay sane under the mountain, and now they were doing the same again as I wondered what would happen when my bedroom door finally opened.

I rested my head against the wall, the chill soothing my stressed mind.

After only a moment of this, I heard my door make a resounding click as someone unlocked it.

I whipped around, standing straight with my arms behind my back, back to being the respectful daughter.

I knew my shadows had gone back to hiding, still nearby in case anything was required of them.

My father opened the door, his clothes and hair more regal and pristine than usual.

“Get yourself dressed, we have an event to attend to.”  He said unemotionally, walking away and leaving the door wide open.

Dread pooled in my stomach.  Whatever this was, I already knew it wasn’t going to be good.

I put on one of my more plain dresses, hoping to attract as little attention as possible.  I stalled for time, taking as long as possible to do my hair.

Maybe I could attempt to stay with one of my friends until Draven gave up on this whole arranged marriage thing.  Though I had no clue which of them would sell me out for the most measly of rewards.  Maybe all of them would.

Eventually, I could stall no more, my father in the doorway, watching me with dark beady eyes.

“Do I have my sweet little girl back, or am I to have to deal with this ungrateful little thing that’s taken her place?”  He asked, placing his hands on my shoulders as he peered into the mirror, looking me in the eye.

I swallowed the hatred that bubbled up, the urge to take the delicate handle of my hair brush and plunge it deep into his chest.  I met his eyes, letting none of that show as I spoke meekly, “I’m sorry for my previous outburst father, I promise never to speak to you like that again.”

He lifted a hand to stroke my hair, his expression almost sweet as he smiled, speaking low, “Good, I love you my darling girl.  You are making me proud, and helping all of us.  Never forget that.”

I forced myself not to shiver as he kissed my head before leaving the room.

Getting up to follow him, I took a few calming breaths, stealing myself for whatever may come.

After surviving years under the mountain, this should be nothing.  But sometimes it felt as if I had more freedom then, than I ever will again.

Everyone was gathered in the main room, waiting for me.

None of them spoke a word to me as my father opened the door, and we all followed him out.

I had three younger sisters, and to my father’s disappointment, no brothers.  My sisters crowded around me, offering silent comfort, my mother walking at my fathers side.

Was that what my life was going to look like after the marriage?  Living a life in silent fear, with no hope of a better future as I was forced to watch my own children be sold away.

I started to feel sick again.

We eventually stopped in a hall and I recognised the rest of the way, leading the way to the living quarters of Keir.

“All of you stay here, and talk to no one.” My father instructed as he straightened the lapel of his jacket.

He looked at me, and I lowered my head as he spoke, “When I call for you, you will behave like the lady you are.  Or there will be consequences.  Understood?”

I nodded, not meeting his stare.

He made a smug noise before turning and walking the rest of the way down the hall.  Keir opened the door after one knock, ushering him in quickly.

We stood there in silence for another moment before I felt a hand grasp mine.  “It’ll be okay.”

I looked down to see my youngest sister grabbing my hand.  She was too young to understand the difference between this place and Under the Mountain.

I gave her a little smile, placing a reassuring hand on her head.  “Of course it’ll be alright.  It may seem scary now, but remember what we always say-”

We both spoke at the same time, “Nothing can hurt us as long as we’re together.”

She looked up at me, her eyes wet with the beginning of tears.  “But we aren’t going to be together.”

I knew that if my father saw, he would scold me, but I pulled her close into a tight embrace.  “It’ll be alright darling, nothing can come between sisters.”

I let her go, quickly smoothing out my dress.

Feeling eyes on me, I looked up to see my mother quickly looking away.

I knew this wasn’t the life she had wanted either.  She used to tell me stories of her family, who hadn’t lived in Hewn City but had been just as cruel.  They had sold her to my father, just as he was now going to sell me.

Keir’s door opened, and my father poked his head out beckoning me in.

I obediently came to him, and he pulled me inside, shutting the door quickly behind us.

Keir’s taste in decor was awful.  Everything had edges sharp enough to draw blood and there was almost no color in anything.  It had a somewhat normal sitting situation, but what intrigued me was the painting that hung in the middle of the room, the subject of the portate being solidly him, with all of his family except his daughter sitting around him.

I swear I could see where she had been painted out.

“So this is the daughter you wish to wed to Draven?”  Kier asked from the large chair he was lounging in, a disgusting smile on his face as he studied me.

Don’t react, don’t show what you think.

“Yes, say hi Y/N.”

“Hello.”  I said meekly, not looking either of them in the eye.

I heard the floor creak, not realizing Keir had gotten up until he was tugging my chin upwards, forcing me to look him in the eyes.

“Hmmmm.”  He hummed as he studied my bruised face before letting me go.

“I heard about her little outburst earlier this month.  If anyone will be able to tame her, it will be Draven.  You have my approval.”

My stomach churned, and I wanted to scream, not hearing the self satisfied words they were passing back and forth now that my fate had been sealed.

I only came back to reality when my father placed a hand on my shoulder.  “Did you hear me Y/N?  I said it’s time to go.”

I bowed my head, following him out and back to my family.

Apparently, my house arrest was over, because once we made it back to one of the more public halls, he announced he would be at home celebrating if anyone needed him or my mother, dragging her off.

Two of my sisters were quick to rush off, but My youngest sister, Stella, stayed by my side as my eyes unfocused, unable to breathe as the panic struck me in full force.

Stella hugged me, and I wrapped my arms around her tightly, breathing in her scent of sugar, dust, and warmth, knowing that soon I would never see her again except in passing.

“You should go hang out with your friends.”  I managed to say once I calmed down enough.

Her eyes were wide as she pulled back, studying my face.

I forced myself to smile as I ruffled her hair, saying in a falsely cheery tone, “Hey!  Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.  I’ma figure out how to fix all of this, okay?”

She nodded slowly, and I planted a quick peck on her forehead.  “Now go!  I’ll be fine.”

I waited until her scent had completely aired out before I let the tears fall, quietly sobbing as I realized that this was the end of my life.

For a little while, the only sound was my gasping sobs until I heard footsteps in the distance.

I covered my mouth, quieting myself even father as I listened.

My shadow companion manifested next to me, obviously noticing the steps as well.

I pondered on whether I should leave, I had already gotten myself in enough trouble, and I dreaded to think about the consequences if I was once again caught doing something my father would punish me for.

But something about the saltwater, baked goods, and dark male scent struck something in me.  I knew it from somewhere, but for some reason I couldn’t place from where.

I once again looked to my shadows.

There was something we had learned to do.  I wasn’t sure if it had never been documented, or if we were the first to be able to do this little trick, but I had never found anything about it.

I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, I could see the world through a dark mist.

My shadows and I could become one in a way, turning me into a shadowy figure that could hide at will.

I could feel the shadows concern for me, and I sighed.  “I’ll be fine, don’t be so fussy” I whispered right before I stretched my head around the corner, my breath catching as I saw who stood there.

Azriel.

I watched him, standing there with something like rage on his features as he paced back and forth, his shadows curling around his ear.

I could feel my shadows' curiosity.  They loved interacting with shadows from different places, learning the stories they held of other lands.

Sometimes I wondered if they wanted out of this place even more than I did.

As I thought about this I wasn’t watching the Illerian male.  And so didn’t notice when he spotted me until he spoke.

“Hello there.”

I practically jumped out of my skin when I heard him speak, preparing to turn and run when one of his shadows reached me, tugging me into full view.

Luckily with my shadows and I being one, I would only look like a stark shadow.

“Who are you?”  He asked, not necessarily angry as he approached me, his shadows loosening their grip on my waist.

“Does it matter?”  I asked, my voice silkier in this form than normal.

He smirked.  “It does if you were spying on me.”  He said, and I saw the blue siphons on his armor glow threateningly.

This is normally where I would apologize, play nice until they realized I was no threat.

But he didn’t know who I was, and I was already boiling over with rage.

“If I wanted to spy on you, I wouldn’t have been caught.”  I say as I take a step through his shadows, his expression flickered to one of shock for just a millisecond before turning back into stone.

“Then what were you doing here?”  He asked, his head tilting as he looked down at me.

I grinned, looking up at him.  “Well, I was minding my own business when I heard some footsteps.  Really, I should be asking you what you’re doing here.”

His lips twitched upwards as he looked down at me.  “I’m waiting for someone to come meet me, but now I’m wondering if I should reschedule.”

My heart started to beat faster with the way he stared down at me, his gaze intense.  “And why is that?”

He grinned now.  “I don’t think I’ve ever met a shadow quite like you.”

I was trying to think of some response that wasn’t just embarrassed babbling when we both heard footsteps coming closer.

Without a moment's hesitation I turned and ran.  He called out after me, but I ignored it, knowing better than to stay around and see who was coming.

Eventually when I was closer to home, I let my shadows unwind, taking their own form again.

“Thank you.”  I whispered to them, and I could feel their happiness.

Meanwhile, I was once again spiraling, but for none of the same reasons as before.

What had I been thinking, taunting the high lord’s spymaster like that?  There were so many bad things that could happen.  What if he found out that I wasn’t just some shadow?  What if he found out who I was and told my father?

I took a deep calming breath.

He didn’t know who I was, and so there was nothing that he could do to me.

More confident, and something else than my impending doom to think about, I went home.

As I opened the door, my father cheered, “She’s back!  My precious daughter who is going to be our salvation.”

My mother was sitting in his lap, and I quickly looked away as I headed for my room.

“Oh, and sweetheart,”  My father said, drawing my attention back to him as he continued, “The date is set, in a little over a month you’ll be married!”

He laughed, happy as could be as he nuzzled my mother’s neck.

I felt sick.  About how soon I would lose my last scraps of freedom, how even though I could see the well hidden disgust on my mother’s face, she let him touch her, his hands gripping her hips so tight it must be painful.

As I went into my room and closed and locked the door, I couldn’t help but hope I would run into Azriel again, despite the risks.

[acescorazon]

*casually drops two updates in one day*

Title: Changes

Chapter: 6/?

Rating: M

Word count: 2063

Warnings: Explicit language, Depressed clown :( ((Buggy's still in that mindset where he thinks he's going to die at any moment and bounces back and forth between not caring and being overly anxious.))

Chapter excerpt:

Mihawk pauses for a moment, and perhaps he’s gathering the right words to say before he speaks again, “And I am man enough to admit my wrongdoings.” Buggy doesn’t get where anything is going, he’s so confused by the sudden change in Hawkeye’s attitude. Is this a weird dream? Is he actually still stuck in that same repetitive loop, just dreaming that Mihawk had a change of heart? Why is Mihawk being so..weird…? Who is this guy? This isn’t the Hawkeye Buggy knows. “Buggy.” He calls out, and Buggy jumps slightly in his seat. He has a strong urge to run out of the room right now. He doesn’t like this. This is so weird… “I apologize. I’ve treated you very horribly in the past, but I hope that you can forgive me for everything and we can have a more positive relationship in the future.”

Forgive him? 

|Ch1|Ch2|Ch3|Ch4|Ch5|

Why, just why? Buggy thinks. He doesn’t want to see them. He doesn’t want to do this. They’re just going to get mad at him and beat him, and… and Buggy just wants to stay in his room. They don’t need him, he messes everything up, and they hate him for it.

They’re going to hurt him again. 

No, no, no. He doesn’t want to go to that stupid meeting. Yet… Buggy detests the idea of either man coming into his room and invading the one place that’s been almost like a safe haven away from them. They’ll come in, criticize everything inside his room, and fill the place with horrible memories. He doesn’t want to walk into his bedroom and instantly think, ‘Wow, that’s the spot where they beat me senseless.’ every time he enters it. He wants to keep them far away from his personal space; it’s bad enough that they already occupy his mind every waking moment. 

Buggy isn’t properly dressed, he’s still in his pajamas, actually, but he quickly gets out of bed, afraid that if he doesn’t go to the meeting room, and now, that Mihawk and Crocodile will come bursting into his room. 

Look, it’s fine. It’s fine. He’ll just go to the stupid meeting and get things over with as quick as possible, maybe he’ll pretend that he’s still really, really ‘sick’, and then he’ll go back to his room and enjoy a few more days of peace. No more, no less, no angering Crocodile and Mihawk over something stupid and then getting his ass kicked. 

He’s okay. 

A few of his men notice his strange attire choice as Buggy rushes to the meeting room for his emergency meeting; and maybe it is a little strange seeing your boss in pink pajamas with little hearts on them, but, who cares about all that right now?! He wants to just get this over with. Hopefully, Mihawk won’t still be mad about the other night when Buggy…

When Buggy got really drunk and then ripped him a new one. He’s been dreading seeing Mihawk for that very reason… Buggy wasn’t in the right state of mind that night, he was sad and anxious, and he just let loose, and…Surely if Mihawk was going to kill him for drunkenly insulting him, he would have by now…but what if he’s just been waiting to slaughter him?

Oh, man, it’s going to be okay.

He’s going to be okay. 

Buggy’s heart is pounding faster and faster in his chest with every little step he takes, and he almost feels like…

It’s weird, really. He’s in his body, but he almost feels like someone else is controlling him, and like he’s just watching everything happening around him, but it’s okay, it’s beyond okay. He’s going to have that meeting, and he’s going to make it out alive. 

As he approaches the meeting room, he can hear loud, somewhat muffled, yelling already, and he freezes. Oh, man. They’re already mad at him. As soon as he steps foot into that room, they’re going to clobber him. He didn’t do anything wrong this time. He didn’t, he didn’t, he didn-  

“I told you i ain’t fucking doing that!”

“Then I’m done.”

“Leave then! I don’t care anymore!” 

Buggy hears their words, but he can’t understand or process them. He doesn’t want to go in. He doesn’t want to end up hurt again. He wants to turn around and go back to his room, and– 

Whatever.

Buggy decides to rip the bandage off, and quickly. He holds his breath and enters the meeting room, and as soon as he does, Mihawk and Crocodile turn to him and pause their argument, staring at Buggy, speechlessly. He’s fine. He’s fine, he knows that he came to a meeting in his pajamas, but it’s not like he’d get beaten up for something like that…would he? He’s fine, he’s fine. 

Neither of them mentions his attire right away, so that’s a good start…right? 

Mihawk is the first to speak after Buggy enters the meeting room, “Oh, so you decided to come after all…How are you?” How is he? How is he?! He’s scared to death! How else would he be at this very moment?! Mihawk basically forced him to come to this meeting, and knowing him, he’s probably going to yell at him. They’re both going to yell at him probably, and then, and then….

“I’m…doing better…still feeling a little unwell…” Buggy says, voice small and shaky. He keeps his eyes glued down to the ground, terrified of making eye contact with the other man at the moment. He quietly takes his seat at his normal spot at the meeting table, hoping that there aren’t objections to at least that, and waits for Mihawk and Crocodile to begin things. 

There’s something foreign and strangely soft about Mihawk’s voice as he has a seat right across from Buggy at the table,  “That’s rather unfortunate, isn’t it? We hope you feel better soon.” We? As in both of them? …What the hell…? There’s no reason to be nice… There’s no reason to lie...There's no reason to do all this... “I’ll get straight to the point: We’re never going to be successful if we continue to act this way towards each other.” 

…What?

“If Cross Guild is going to be successful, we need to treat each other with respect, and I mean that. I believe that we need to start fresh, and move on from everything that’s happened in the past.”

...What???

Buggy briefly glances up, accidentally making eye contact with Mihawk, before quickly averting his gaze back down to the table. Why is he saying this all of a sudden? Surely he doesn’t care that much about them having a good relationship, if he did he would have been nice from the start or would have actually accepted one of Buggy’s many previous offers to have a cordial relationship with each other, but he didn’t.  Mihawk’s never once seemed interested in treating Buggy with ‘respect’, so what’s different all of a sudden?  

Mihawk pauses for a moment, and perhaps he’s gathering the right words to say before he speaks again, “And I am man enough to admit my wrongdoings.” Buggy doesn’t get where any of this is going, he’s so confused by the sudden change in Hawkeye’s attitude. Is this a weird dream? Is he actually still stuck in that same repetitive loop, just dreaming that Mihawk had a change of heart? Why is Mihawk being so..weird…? Who is this guy? This isn’t the Hawkeye Buggy knows. “Buggy.” He calls out, and Buggy jumps slightly in his seat. He has a strong urge to run out of the room right now. He doesn’t like this. This is so weird… “I apologize. I’ve treated you very horribly in the past, but I hope that you can forgive me for everything and we can have a more positive relationship in the future.”

Forgive him?!

What a load of Bullshit! Just when he thought that Mihawk couldn’t get worse… Does he actually think that Buggy can forgive him and just forget everything he’s done just because he gave him a simple little apology? He’s beaten him, he’s degraded him, he’s humiliated him, he’s… he’s threatened Buggy’s life! And he thinks an apology is going to make up for it?! He expects Buggy to happily accept his apology and pretend nothing happened when…when he’s hurt Buggy so badly! No, screw that! Why should he ever forgive Mihawk even if he apologizes to him hundreds or thousands of times?

Buggy doesn’t want this. He doesn’t need this. What he wants is for Mihawk (and Crocodile) to just leave the island before they can cause any (more) harm to Buggy and his crew! Screw his apology! He doesn’t realize it at first, but he ends up glaring at Mihawk, angry and in disbelief that Mihawk thinks this will all go away with an apology, but he does eventually realize what he’s doing and it’s all thanks to Crocodile:

“What’s with that look, clown?” Crocodile scoffs, and as soon as those very words leave his mouth, Buggy quickly looks back down at the table, hoping that he’s not about to start a fight for something he didn’t even realize he was doing. “Are you too good to accept his apology?” …it’s not even that! How can Crocodile be so much of a jerk that he… that he can’t even see why Buggy’s hesitant to accept Mihawk’s apology?! Oh, that’s right, he’s probably never gone through what Buggy’s gone through before, and plus, Crocodile’s cruel and evil, and he doesn’t have any sense of empathy or humanity! How could Buggy forget? 

“Crocodile, if he doesn’t want to accept my apology, then I understand.” Mihawk sighs, “I understand that I’ve hurt you severely and how you might be hesitant to accept my apology or even believe it’s genuine. It’s my own fault, really… But I truly want all of us to get along better from now on, even if it’ll take some time.” 

Buggy still can’t believe any of this is happening… He doesn’t want to get along with Crocodile and Mihawk now after everything that’s happened between them, it’s far too late. He tried to offer his friendship ages ago, but they never wanted it…why should he try to be their friend now? They’re horrible people! “I want to suggest that the three of us have a nice dinner to discuss the future of Cross Guild as well as try to get to know each other better,” Mihawk states, and there’s a moment of silence after Mihawk makes his suggestion, but Crocodile and Buggy’s reaction soon afterward is…predictable.

“Nah, I'll pass.” Crocodile sneers, while Buggy just looks up in shock and confusion. What the fuck, man? No. Why would Buggy ever want to… He didn’t even want to come to this meeting, why would he want to have dinner with Mihawk and Crocodile?! Buggy hasn’t even accepted Mihawk’s apology, does he think he did? Does it even matter if Buggy accepts his apology or not? Does he think they’re all just buddies now? Does he really think that they can just forget about all the times he and Crocodile beat the shit out of Buggy?! Because they can’t! “I feel… really sick… I don’t think I can come.” Buggy lies, but then again, it really isn’t much of a lie because he’s fucking sick to his stomach right now. 

What is Mihawk even on right now?! 

“That’s also fine.” Mihawk nods, “But the offer remains on the table if both or either of you change your minds. Now, Crocodile, do you have something you’d like to say to Buggy?” 

No way. Buggy gets the feeling he knows where Mihawk is trying to guide the conversation, and there’s no way Crocodile would actually apologize to Buggy. Crocodile probably hates Buggy a hundred times more than Mihawk does and he’s made that fact abundantly clear several times already. “I ain’t got nothing to say to him.” Crocodile replies a moment later, and that’s the exact reaction Buggy thought he’d have, but… But at least he’s not being weird and suddenly trying to be all nice and crap, at least he’s still being consistent. 

Mihawk exhales a sigh, getting up from his seat, “Then, I have no more to say to either of you, have a good day.” What? What was the point in all that? Buggy stays seated in his chair as Mihawk makes his exit, secretly peeking over at Crocodile and trying to gauge his reaction. They both think this is weird, right? Buggy’s not the only one confused by this all, right? 

Crocodile’s expression is almost unreadable, but Buggy doesn’t think he’s too happy at the moment. He sits in his seat as well, uncharacteristically quiet and almost…calm? No, that’s not the word for it. He’s not calm, he definitely doesn’t seem calm, he actually seems like he’s quietly seething as he stares in Buggy’s direction. His aura is much more intimidating than usual, and Buggy can just barely make out the sight of Crocodile clutching his fist tightly. “I don’t think we’ll be having any more meetings for a while, clown,” He announces, and there’s a terrifying combination of coldness and hatred in his voice. “In fact, it might just be you and me in Cross Guild from now on.”

What?

((A/N: All i needed to see was the flyer in the anime. That's all i needed and now i'm acting GOOFY.))