#I haven’t done one of these in forever wow

[floral-hex]

woke up at 4am feeling the weight of my life crushing me, so I’ve been sitting out in my car for the last couple of hours because I just need. to. be. somewhere else.

[livwritessometimes]

loml - Max Verstappen

: Max Verstappen x Singer!reader

: Max and Y/n’s relationship was legendary…but it also was momentary

: Series Masterlist

: Main Masterlist

: Author's Note - After every fic i feel like wow this is the longest fic i have ever written...ya this! is probably the longest fic i have ever written!!

…

(set in 2018)

Yourname added to their story!

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| maxverstappen1 replied to your story

-> 💙

*liked by Yourname*

maxverstappen1 added to their story!

seen by Yourname and 492,193 others

| Yourname replied to your story

-> P1 Lesgoooooo 🙌🏻

| User34 replied to your story

-> it’s so nice to see you get the recognition you deserve <3

*liked by maxverstappen1*

Y/n was standing near the Red Bull garage when she spotted Max returning for his interviews. Without a second thought, she launched herself into his arms.

“Ahhhhh, I’m so proud of you!!! I feel like I haven’t said that enough,” she smiled as she pulled away from him. “You have, but it’s okay. I’ll never get tired of hearing you say that,” Max said as he looked at her as if her eyes held all the stars in the sky.

Max was aware that by now they would have cameras on them; the Red Bull team loved to capture any interaction between the couple. Ignoring all of that, Max pulled her close and kissed her.

For Y/n, all of this was very new; her last relationship hadn't been this public. The privacy of it all was something that was exciting at first, but after a while, it felt suffocating. When she met Max, she felt aglow like she had never felt before. It was only a matter of time before she knew that Max was the one for her.

And it wasn't easy; they were both slowly gaining more recognition, and people were ready to pick them apart. But as she watched Max celebrate his first Grand Prix win of the season in Austria, all the struggles felt worth the effort.

maxverstappen1 added to their story!

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"I have a story to tell you regarding the last song of the night," said Y/n as the crowd erupted in cheers. She smiled brightly before continuing, "A few years ago, I did not believe in love, not in the way I do now. Have you guys ever met someone who feels so right that all you want is to be close to him forever and ever?"

"Being with them feels like breathing, like something you've done your whole life. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Lover," Y/n said as she made eye contact with Max. Slowly, the intro starts playing, but all Max could look at was Y/n, in all her element, looking back at him.

If the world were to end tomorrow, Max would have died a happy man. Lost in their little universe, the two failed to notice all the fans that captured this beautiful moment between the couple. Racing can take up a lot of Max's time, and he's not proud of the fact that a lot of times it comes at the stake of their relationship. But right here, right now, all he could focus on was Y/n.

Yourname added to their story!

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| maxverstappen1 replied to your story

-> 💕

Yourname: I'm so happy that you were able to make it!! thank you so much for coming, it means a lot to me Max <3

-> Ofc Liefde, I had some time off thought I'd drop by

| User55 replied to your story

-> it is so nice to see Max at your concert!!! your entire face lit up when you saw him, i hope you guys stay like this forever ✨

*liked by Yourname*

liked by maxverstappen and 84,946 others

👤: maxverstappen1

Yourname: So proud of how far we’ve come, Maxiee!!! From being just a bunch of kids who wanted to make a name for themselves and achieve their goals to finally living their dream life, I couldn’t have done it without you by my side 💖

view all 78,732 comments

maxverstappen1: Couldn't have done it without you as well Schat 💙

*liked by Yourname*

bffname: Cuties!!! Can't wait to meet you guys <3

*liked by Yourname, maxverstappen1*

The entire party, all Y/n could do was check her phone. She felt guilty; it was bffname's day, and it was supposed to be special, yet here she was feeling sad for herself. From the corner of her eye, bffname could see Y/n in the corner of the room, nursing her 4th drink of the night.

"You can leave, you know. I won't feel bad," said bffname. Y/n looked up from her phone immediately, as if she were caught doing something she wasn't supposed to. "No, no, it's not like that. I want to be here; it's your 23rd birthday; I wouldn't miss it for the world," said Y/n. "You know you can fool anyone you want, but you can never fool me. I know you like the back of my hand," said bffname. "If you want to go to Max, it's okay; you being able to make it was more than enough."

Y/n felt her eyes tearing up a little; even after being a horrible friend, bffname was still understanding. "I'm so sorry; I have been a shitty friend, and yet you are here checking on me rather than celebrating," Y/n said as she finally felt a few droplets stream down her face.

"See, I know that you and Max haven't been in the best place, but it's okay. I know it's scary; you have been with him for so long that even the idea of losing him is scary," bffname said as she wiped a few tears off of Y/n's face. "Just don't lose yourself while trying to save your relationship."

liked by User11 and 38,372 others

👤: maxverstappen1, Yourname

F1gossip: Red Bull driver Max Verstappen and singer/songwriter Y/n L/n were seen fighting outside by some of the paps. It was noticed that Verstappen had come to pick up L/n from a party (Bffname Bfflastname's birthday celebration). The two were seen arguing, and it is even believed that L/n was under the influence of alcohol. Verstappen was seen comforting L/n, but much to his attempts, L/n was not budging. Later on, Verstappen was seen shouting at L/n. It ended with Verstappen getting in the car and storming off, leaving a teary-eyed L/n behind. It is believed that the couple might have called it quits after dating for 2 years. This news has not been confirmed by either Verstappen or L/n. Check out our website for more updates on the Verstappen-L/n fight.

view all 31,286 comments

User75: Nooo whyyyy???? they were so happy tho...

-> User09: ikrrr bffname had commented on yourname's post too! She was so excited to meet them. What happened?

User20: I'm not believing any of this until I see either of them confirm the breakup. They are happily dating, and this never happened ^^

-> User11: @/User20 check twt

(set in 2019)

liked by User32 and 51,329 others

👤: maxverstappen1, Yourname

F1gossip: 6 months after their breakup, Max Verstappen and Y/n L/n were spotted together in Miami. The two seemed to be having a good time at the beach under the warm Miami sun. A close source to Verstappen reveals that the two have been seeing each other for a few months now. This is the first time the pair were spotted together after their public breakup. Both Verstappen and L/n have been doing well in their career paths ever since their breakup. Verstappen has won 2 Grand Prix so far and has seen a massive improvement in this performance as compared to last year, whereas L/n has recently released her 3rd studio album, with all the songs making it into the Billboard Hot 100. Only time will tell whether the two are in it for the long run or whether they call it quits again.

view all 43,894 comments

User02: I'M NO LONGER A CHILD OF DIVORCE 🙌🏻

-> User59: I just hope they make it work this time!!!

User76: Not to be like that, but this will either give us the best love song of the summer or the most gut-wrenching song ever to exist

Y/n smiled as she put her phone down and looked back at Max. Both of them had decided to take a quick trip to Miami. "Do you think we'll have kids?" Max asked so nonchalantly that Y/n had to ask again to make sure she heard him right, "What?" "Do you think we'll have kids later on in life?" Max repeated. "I think I would like to have a girl," Max continued as he looked out at the sea. Amused, Y/n asked, "Oh, really? and why is that?" "I feel like a girl is easy to manage; you know, there are less chances that she'll end up like me," Max said before adding, "Plus, she'll look like you, so you know she is gonna have everyone wrapped around her little finger."

Max looked back at Y/n with a cheeky smile to see her already looking back at him with a look that conveyed nothing but pure love. "I think you'd be a great dad; even if we have a son, and if he becomes even half the man you are, then we did a great job raising him," Y/n said as she ran her hands through Max's hair. "I've not had the best example growing up; I mean, I know my dad wasn't the best, but had he not made all the sacrifices he did back then, I would not have been here. 'Max Verstappen, Star of Red Bull' I would have been a loser," Max said as he closed his eyes, soaking in his surroundings. It felt nice, peaceful even, being away from everything.

"A loser who I'd still love," Y/n said as she pulled Max closer. "Even if you do not have anything with you, you will always have me," she added. "Oh, don't you worry about that; I plan on keeping you by my side forever," Max said. "You just wait till I put a ring on that finger; after that, you can't leave me, even if you wanted to," he added. "I wouldn't dream of it," Y/n said before getting up and running towards the water. Their laughter filled the air as Max got up and chased after her, pulling her into the water with him.

Yourname added to their story!

(Cat's out of the bag I guess 🤭)

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| maxverstappen1 replied to your story

-> 💙

*liked by Yourname*

redbullracing added to their story!

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| maxverstappen1 replied to your story

-> 💪🏻💪🏻

*liked by redbullracing*

Max should be happy; he should feel all the joy in the world; he finished 3rd in the standings after all, yet the smile did not reach his eyes. He looked around the party thrown to celebrate his and the team's victory and saw Y/n talking to one of the engineers. Max couldn't help but let the bittersweet thought take over his mind. He hated himself for thinking these things, but ever since he got back with Y/n, his season hasn't been goin- "She seems nice, Y/n, I mean," breaking his chain of thoughts, Max looked at his father. "Huh, oh ya," said Max as he took a sip of his drink.

"But she's not right for you; before you got back with her, everything was going in your favor, and look at you now; you're 3rd on the list. You can do better, Max," said Jos as he went to talk to other people at the party. Max hated his father for being critical about his relationship, but he hated himself more because he himself had thought about this.

So one cancelled date becomes two, and before Max knew it, he was constantly blowing off Y/n. In fact, if he comes to think of it, this is probably the first time the two have been out together in a month. So lost in his thought, Max did not notice a sad Y/n slipping from the party.

liked by User90 and 63,493 others

👤: Yourname, maxverstappen1

F1gossip: Is it finally over between Verstappen and L/n? Y/n L/n was seen leaving the Red Bull celebration a little early. The singer seemed to be upset as she left the building. One of the workers at the party informed us that the two did not spend much time together. Verstappen and L/n, who have not been spotted out in public in a month, were seen entering the party together a few hours ago, and that was the last of it. We got information from a close source to the couple that things have been rocky between the two. According to the source, Verstappen considers his relationship with L/n a distraction, which led to him not performing to the best of his abilities after the summer break. Verstappen has only won one Grand Prix ever since L/n confirmed that the two were back together via an Instagram Story. It seems like it is finally time to bury the hatchet in the Verstappen-L/n love story.

view all 57,303 comments

User23: Honestly their constant on and off is annoying at this point, like make up your mind already ffs

User99: I mean, it's not like Max is wrong...ever since they got back together, he hasn't been doing his best, and that is pretty evident

(set in 2020)

Y/n knew that this was wrong. She knows that she can't keep running back to Max after he shows up, making the same promises again and again. At this point, Y/n can probably narrate it in her sleep: "I promise I'll change," "We are meant to be," "You're the love of my life; I can't lose you." Yet she believed him every single time. How could she not? They have been through so much together. How could she let go of all this history because things have been rocky between them?

Lost in her trail of thoughts, Y/n did not realize that she had reached the venue. It was when she felt her side of the door open that she looked up to find a dazzling Max looking back at her. He was glowing; having just won the 70th anniversary GP, Max looked like he would burst from happiness. Y/n couldn't help but match his smile.

They both slowly made their way through the red carpet, posing for pictures. As they reached the entrance, she felt Max fidgeting. "What's wrong?" she asked as she reached for his hand. Max laced his finger with her before saying, "Nothing; it's just that this is my first win of the season. I thought that this year would have been my year, but would you look at how it all turned out to be?" Y/n nodded at Max to continue, "I never thought I would spend so much time at home because of the pandemic, and I never thought that all that time alone would make me realize how much I have missed you," Max said before looking at Y/n. "Every second without you feels like I'm suffocating; you're like a breath of fresh air. Every time I look at you, I feel like all the stars in the sky are nothing compared to you," said Max as he caressed Y/n's cheek.

Y/n didn't know how to describe this feeling. Standing in front of her was a boy she had known for a long time, a boy who always wanted to prove his worth to his father, a boy who sacrificed so much to achieve his dreams, a boy who was simply madly in love with her.

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👤: maxverstappen1

Yourname: ...and at every table, I'll save you a seat 💙

view all 89,097 comments

maxverstappen1: I love you

-> Yourname: I love you too Max

User77: Y/n I love you sweetheart, but noooo why are you back with Max

-> User62: shut up! you're just jealous of what they have

-> User77: tf no, I am concerned about her! Every time they get back together, I feel like Y/n looks less and less happy

-> User22: can we stop all of this and just appreciate how hot they both look 🔥

liked by User71 and 72,391 others

👤: maxverstappen1, redbullracing

F1: Max Verstappen out of the Sakhir Grand Prix on lap 1. Trying to avoid Sergio Perez, who was hit by Charles Leclerc at turn 4, Verstappen ended up on the gravel, crashing into the tire barrier. This is the 4th time this season Verstappen has not been able to finish a race. With one race left, Verstappen's chances of winning the world championship seem a little out of reach at the moment. We can only hope for the best for the Dutchman.

view all 68,523 comments

User71: Then you guys say that him getting back with Y/n has nothing to do with his performance!!

-> User04: Shut up that has got nothing to do with Y/n

-> User71: whatever you say 🤷🏻‍♀️ the evidence is right there but okay ignorance is bliss i guess

liked by User22 and 90,272 others

👤: Yourname, maxverstappen1

F1gossip: All's well that ends well, but not for Y/n L/n. It seems like Max Verstappen has finally ended things for good between the both of them. This news comes after L/n was seen leaving their shared apartment with boxes of her belongings. The two have also since unfollowed each other on Instagram. Although many members of the Red Bull team, including team principal Christian Horner and wife Geri Halliwell, still continue to follow the singer, it is safe to say that their ship has officially sailed. Check out our website to see their entire relationship timeline.

view all 84,320comments

User22: Not the admin using lyrics from Lover

-> User48: I was thinking the same thing, like, "All's well that ends well to end up with you" i- 😀

User01: FINALLYYY I'm telling you all next year is gonna be Max's year!! I CAN FEEL IT!!!!

(set in 2021)

liked by maxverstappen1 and 892,620 others

👤: maxverstappen1, kellypiquet

redbullracing: OUR CHAMPION!!! LET'S GO MAX 🦁🏆

view all 231,494 comments

User01: I TOLD YOU ALL IT WAS GONNA BE MAX'S YEAR!!! HE FINALLY WON THE CHAMPIONSHIP 🏆🏆

*liked by redbullracing*

User11: I'm really happy for Max, but did he just confirm his relationship with Kelly Piquet!!! who, may I add, has a CHILD!!!!!!!

-> User67: Ikrrrrr like I'm sorry, but he was with Y/n for such a long time, and now he has a new girl and a child in his life??? This was supposed to be him and Y/n!!!!

liked by User88 and 89,638 others

👤: Yourname, maxverstappen1

F1gossip: Y/n L/n was spotted outside for the first time since the news of Max Verstappen dating Brazilian model Kelly Piquet came out. L/n was seen sitting alone in a park, drinking beer. It is believed that this park was one that Verstappen and L/n used to visit a lot with Verstappen's cats. Many bystanders have said that the singer looked lost in her thoughts as she continued sipping her drink. It seems that everyone had believed the two would be back together by the end of the season when pictures of Verstappen with a mysterious woman surfaced, but much to everyone's surprise, the woman in the pictures is now believed to be Piquet. I guess we can say with certainty that Verstappen-L/n has officially come to an end.

view all 68,938 comments

User03: Why are you so obsessed with Y/n? it's so annoying. They broke up; let her be!!

User56: Ofc she's salty now that Max has a good woman by his side. She'll just do about anything to get his attention, wouldn't she?

liked by bffname and 165,872 others

Yourname: I had taken some time off from everything - my music, my fans, my friends, even my family. I was at a place where I felt something I had never felt before. People tell you that there will come a time in everyone's life where you will feel absolutely lost, like you don't know what to do with your life now, and it is very easy to say that with time you'll get through it and find your way again. What everyone fails to mention is how lonely this time will feel. You have people who love you and want the best for you, yet you can't seem to get out of this hole you have dug up for yourself. Taking a break and going back to where I started my journey made me realize why I do what I do. I have never needed songwriting more than I did during this period of time. As I write this, I finally realize that this chapter of my life is over. I have no wounds that I need to heal, no bridges that I want to burn. As of today, I set this song free. It was mine once, and it's yours now. loml out at midnight.

view all 101,728 comments

User55: Y/n wtffffff I was not prepared for this!!!!! Girl it's 2 PM YOU CAN'T JUST DROP THIS AND EXPECT ME TO BE FINE!!

bffname: I am so proud of you!!! words can't sum up how much I adore the person you have become 💕

*liked by Yourname*

User91: waitttt is this about her situation with Max???

-> User40: I mean must be! who else would she be referring to as love of my life??

-> User91: true

liked by bffname and 201,826 others

Yourname: I would like to thank all of my fans for the immense support they have shown me. Your kind words mean the world to me. Thank you for always accepting me the way I am and sticking with me, for better and for worse. I had the time of my life playing for you guys. I can't wait for more shows in the future 🩵

view all 121,455 comments

User32: I still can't get over loml!!! what do you mean by "A con-man sells a fool a get-love-quick scheme"

-> User13: Are we gonna ignore "What we thought was for all time was momentary"!!!!!!!! I feel like someone stabbed me in my gallbladder and then poured detergent over it 🫨

User40: What do you mean by loml - love loss of my life 💔

User28: "Our field of dreams, engulfed in fire. Your arson's match, your somber eyes And I'll still see it until I die" that is because that dream is dead now :(

-> User13: They talked about having kids one day!!! and now he gets to live that life with someone else 🥲

-> User66: Y/n I hate the fact that you had to go through this. My ex passed away before we could start a life together. It sucks when you plan your entire future with someone and then they're just not there. And now it's just you, alone, in the house of your dreams that you both built for yourselves. I wish you all the strength and happiness that there is in this world!! 🤍

[enwoso]

NUMBER ONE FAN — alessia russo x gymnast!reader

this was inspired by my admiration for those who can do gymnastics! i may do a little blurb to go with this, maybe;)

also if the timeline of this doesn’t work then please pretend it does thanks xoxo

in which alessia becomes your number one fan at your first olympics.

face claim: georgia-mae fenton

masterlist

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by alessia and 109,392 others

yourusername finally an olympian! team final and AA final let’s go!

comments

user1 can’t wait to watch! i’ll be there cheering team gb on!!

user2 your an such an inspiration

alessia yes y/n! you’ve got this! so proud of you

-> yourusername thanks lessi, can’t wait to see you🙃

user3 alessia? what are you doing here😀

alicekinsella17 ayyy!!!

user4 so we just gonna ignore alessia russo being here? yeah, okay cool😎🆒

alessia

liked by ellatoone and 207,381 others

alessia bonjour parís 🇫🇷🤸🏻‍♀️🏅

comments

user5 is she going to watch the olympics?

-> user6 she’s been at the gymnastics!

user7 you look so beautiful alessia!!

ellatoone interesting shirt?

-> alessia it’s pretty cool if you ask me😏

-> yourusername woah how’ve you got that?

user8 anyone wanna bet that the shirt is y/n?

-> user9 it is y/n’s!

user10 are alessia and y/n dating?

yourusername

liked by teamgb and 128,015 others

yourusername out and about and for once not in a leo😮

comment

user11 AHHH this is not a drill everyone

user12 i feel like im in a fever dream. alessia and y/n together.

alessia you always get my best angle don’t you…

-> yourusername always! a view with a view😉

user13 not them trying to soft launch as if we haven’t already known😃😅

user14 real question is whose name is on the back of that england shirt

-> user15 has to be russo

-> user16 got to be a russo shirt

-> yourusername beckham obviously:)

alessia added to their story

yourusername

liked by ellatoone and 158,094 others

yourusername wow! what an experience. so proud of the girls that i get to call my teammates we showed great team spirit against all the doubters. while it would have been great to come away with a medal, we still gave it are all and did our best. proud of us🤍

comments

user17 wow wish i was that good at gymnastics

user18 jealous of alessia tbh

ellatoone can you teach me how do them flips?

-> yourusername of course, can you do a forward roll..

-> ellatoone no idea probably🤷🏼‍♀️

teamgb well done y/n! everyone is so proud of you🇬🇧🤸🏻‍♂️

user19 your such an inspiration!!

alessia so proud of you baby

-> yourusername i love you so much❤️

alessia

liked by yourusername and 582,019 others

alessia proud girlfriend moment🥹

comments

user20 everyone act shocked!

-> user21 wait what there together?

user22 stop this is so sweet. alessia has literally been y/n biggest supporter.

yourusername your so cute lessi🥹

-> alessia forever will be your number one fan❤️

user23 the fact i saw the hug in real life

ellatoone absolute sap

-> alessia shush

-> ellatoone you’ve spent too long in the city of love it’s hypnotised you-

user24 now we need to see y/n in her wag era!

[tothosewholisten]

Forever Healed | TUA insert

Chapter: 00

next chapter>>

Masterlist

…

On the 12th hour of the first day of October 1989. 43 women around the world gave birth. This was unusual in the fact that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began.

Sir Reginald Hargeeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.

He got seven of them, yes seven.

..

MARCH 21, 2019

I have to be at least somewhat proud of myself for lasting this long. I thought as I sat on the bus, not everyday you are born with magical powers and are destined to save the world from evil. Yes, hearing myself think that sounds crazy. But that's normal in my life.

I had reached my stop after a half an hour of sitting with my earbuds in, listening to nothing at all. I just wanted to seem unapproachable on the sketchy city bus.

My destination was a terribly designed office building, the space was so crammed and ugly it made me want to turn right back around and get on that bus again. But I didn't because I was trying to convince myself that this would be good for me, but I didn't believe my words.

I was about to have a therapy session with some middle-aged white lady who has glasses and tell her all of my life issues, starting every week at 5pm..

It's not like I had anything else going on, I haven't had work for days now. So I thought I'd give it a shot.

The waiting process made me anxious as hell, I finally got the courage to walk up to the front desk and gave the man who sat there my name. And now I have to wait for this lady to get done with some other patient.

I sat on a chair and frowned, like she is really going to be focused on "my" problems and not the 30 other people she sees today.

I swear it was only a second into me zoning out when I heard my name yelled. "Y/n L/n? It's so nice to meet you!" A woman said, when i looked up at her i saw the exact lady i was describing earlier to the closest details.

I let her lead me to a smaller room that looked way better than the lobby. It had two chairs, a water machine, some fidget items and a large window view of the city. Gloria, I learn to be the name of my therapist, asks me to sit with her.

She clears her throat, "I know this is our first session so you may not be the most comfortable sharing details. But I'd like to know a little bit about you if you're okay sharing."

“Well, I’m 29 years old and a home care nurse.” I say slowly. Hearing the words leave my mouth I knew I haven’t amounted to a lot in my years.

"Oh wow, 29? I would've never guessed that Y/n, you don't look a day over 21" Gloria complimented me i give her a tiny smile in return.

I'm not sure why that is, I get that a lot in my working field. Older women saying that they wished they looked as young as me.

"That's a great start for today's session." She smiles, "A little bit me is, you know my name already but I'm 56 years old since Monday. I have 3 children and a cat named Mr. Furball."

I regret what i said earlier because I think I already like Gloria and not just because of Mr. Furball. But the fact that she has a calming sense about her. I find myself listening to what she's saying, and I rarely do that with people nowadays.

"But I would like to hear more about your upbringing, how’d you become the fine young lady you are today?" She says.

Oh, she wants to hear about my childhood. I mean I knew she would ask but so soon, I'm worried about saying anything. So I told her that.

"I'm worried about opening up to someone about my past cause well I've never done it before." I said.

She hands me a cup of water. "That's okay Y/n, we can take it at your pace."

“I grew up in a small house with my mom and dad until I was twelve. When I was scouted by Reginald Hargreeves because of my unique abilities. And I've been there ever since I was 18 when I moved out to live on my own.” I waited for the burst of confusion I was about to get from Gloria. Not everyday one of the Umbrella Academy walks into your office.

“Oh wow…” she says, eyes wide. “You're one of those superheroes? That’s amazing wow.” She nervously chuckles “I’m sorry I’m normally not this shocked about things, and I hear a lot on the daily.”

“It’s okay” I say, staring at my hands.

She clears her throat. “I'm sure being apart of the Umbrella Academy was big but could you tell me about your life before that?”

I closed my eyes for a couple of seconds, pictured my childhood in my brain and opened my mouth.

"Well, I'm sure to this day my father still thinks that my mother cheated on him, due to his "daughter's" virgin Mary-like creation since they were just newlyweds. He held it against my mother all of her life." I took a sip of water and continued.

"I'm not sure why he turned to alcohol. But that turned out as you could expect. He turned on everyone around him and acted like a beast. He regularly attacked my mom for anything she did wrong. But what made him more angry was that his freak of a daughter could heal her mother, after every beating."

"My mom told me before I left I had made her so much happier and in her words. She didn't even question these strange occurrences; she knew her baby was special." I smiled a bit.

I could tell that Gloria was painting a picture in her head of what I was describing too.

"And by the age of 8, I was standing up to my father, even if it didn't end so well. I'd get the beating instead but by the next day, my bloody body would be as good as new. On the surface at least, I had lots of internal issues from that time. But none of that stopped my father from trying to get equal with me.." I stopped talking after that.

My eyes could only focus on my right hand as it was picking at my left hand's skin. It was a habit I picked up as soon as I started to use my powers because I knew my skin would be right back to normal in the next few minutes.

"That's awful y/n I'm so sorry." She frowned. "Would you be okay with continuing?"

I blink up at her. “Yes, that would be okay,” I said. “Then there was this one day..”

..

17 YEARS AGO

“In five, four, three, two. This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for channel 2 News outside of the Capital West Bank at Main and Sixth. A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages.”

That was the big news update of September 2002, I remember. Well I don’t really have to think about it much because I was there with my mom at the bank. She planned on making some deposit when we were screamed at, not to leave by a man who had his gun pointed at us along with so many other civilians. He taped us up and told us to stand in a corner.

That was the first and only time I feared for my life. Police didn’t want them to start shooting, so they didn’t come into the building. Meaning that we were on our own and could die at anytime

One of the armed men walks into the scene unfolding. Sirens blaring, people getting shoved around and threats being made to the innocent.

“Now you’ve put me in a position where I gotta do something I don't want to do. Hmm?” He said talking to another person on his walkie talkie.

My mom brought me closer to her trying to use her body as a shield if things went south. And to us we thought they were about to be.

But strangely, a girl walked up to the man. She’d looked to be around my age in a school uniform and cartoon mask. Her loose curls bounced in the wind as she skipped up to him.

“Shit!” He screams putting his device down. Not noticing the girl until a few seconds after his outburst. “Hey, get back with the others.” He told her, trying to sound intimidating but she didn’t seem to fear him at all.

“I heard a rumor.” She spoke out.

He bent a little to reach her height and get in her face. “What? What did you say?”

She leaned in and cupped her hand to mimic whispering in his ear but loud enough for all of us to hear. “I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot.”

Without any hesitation he did what she commanded and shot the nearest armed man who happened to be trying to rough up my mom. We screamed as he kept shooting.

“We just heard shots from inside the bank. It’s uncertain if any hostages have been harmed in that.”

“There’s some movement on the roof. Possibly law enforcement.”

A loud crash and a boy landed down from the roof. It was crazy he wasn’t harmed at all from that high distance. He was also wearing the same mask and uniform as the girl but he had blond hair. From where he landed he jumped on one of the robbers and started beating him to a pulp, and then throwing him out a glass window.

“Looks like one of the armed robbers had been thrown from the bank.”

Another boy with brown hair runs in from the opposite doors as the girl and yells. “Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives.” He then threw one of his knives and it curved in the air hitting a robber no where close to where the knife had originally been heading. It was incredible.

“I've been in many hostage situations like this, and it can escalate very quickly.”

The original man hops on a table pointing his gun out at the two of the before seen children plus another one. “Get back you freaks” he says walking back and forth in fear.

“Hey, be careful up there, buddy.” The knife boy calls out.

“Get back now!” The man screams.

“Yeah, I wouldn't want you to get hurt.” The girls mocking voice says.

Right before my eyes another boy teleports behind the man, sitting criss-cross on the table. “Or what?” He said calmly.

The man turns around and shoots at him but before the bullets could hit he teleports again. This time standing up with his arms crossed, clearly not impressed. But the man tries to shoot again.

“Ooh! That’s one badass stapler!” The boy laughs. The man no longer had a gun anymore but a stapler placed in his hand by the kid instead. The boy shoves the stapler into his face and the big man falls back, head hitting the floor before his body does.

“Although there’s been no activity for a few minutes, we’re gonna stay live on location to make sure we don’t miss a thing. In this hostage situation at the Capital West bank.”

The five already counted for children make way for the last and shortest one to make his move. “Do we really need to do this?” He talks quietly.

The blonde one replies to him. “Come on, Ben. There’s more guys in the vault.” So his name was Ben huh?

Ben sighs, “I didn't sign up for this.” Before walking into the room with more people. Large black tendrils illuminated the room as men screaming could be heard behind the door. And a beast roars but then the sound stops and Ben walks out again, this time covered in blood and guts.

He breathes heavily. “Can we go home now?” I felt bad for him.

The kids untied our hands and told us to run. And once it was clear to go my mom started to run out of the doors thinking I was right behind her.

“Now we see the hostages. They— They’re free. They’re scared clearly but they do seem to be unharmed.”

But I was behind her trying to help this older woman who’d slipped on the floor. As I was helping her, the kids walked out too.

“People are coming out now. It’s not the armed robbers. These are schoolchildren in uniforms with masks on. Jim Hellerman, Channel 2 News.”

But there was one not accounted for robber, the one from earlier who had been shot in the foot. I started to run out and call out to my mom who was outside. When the man got up from the floor, cocked his gun and shot at the kids.

Fortunately, he missed them but the bullet hit me.

Questions being asked to the children stopped when they saw my body flail onto the floor outside of the bank doors. I was shot right in the chest. There was blood everywhere and it started to leak over to where the kids were standing. They turned around to see where it was coming from..

Everyone looked horrified and there was a bunch of screaming. Mainly from my mother who was wailing as she ran over to hold me to her chest screaming for me to wake up. And that will be engraved in my memory forever after this day, I never wanted to hear her like this ever again.

Police started to rush over but in a matter of minutes, a miracle seemed to happen. At least to the city that is. There was a yellowish glow around my chest and the blood seemed to have reversed back into my body. Even the stains on my blue dress were gone. The bullet even spit out of my chest; it was truly witchcraft.

My eyes then shot open as I started to breathe in and out.

I don't exactly remember what I felt during those moments but I'm sure I left those people around me stunned. After all this was their first look at powers.

I couldn't care what the paramedics were talking about above my body. I was focused on the 6 children looking at me bewildered as well as the old-looking man with them and whatever my mom was saying at the time.

I was put on a stretcher and rushed to a hospital for evaluations after the pandemics came but they never found anything. It was like everything was perfectly reattached.

But as I was leaving I could see the news reporters zeroing in on the kids trying to get the details on how these children saved the bank from thievery.

“Our world is changing.” The man spoke to the crowd. “Has changed. There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary.” He said looking back at the children. But they weren’t paying attention, some were staring at my ambulance and some eyes were on the ground.

“I have adopted seven such children. I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy.”

I now realize thinking back, the seventh person he was talking about was me..

..

PRESENT DAY

My mouth felt like it was moving faster than my brain so I took a pause and chugged the rest of my water cup.

Once again Glorias eyes were wide open. As she took some notes down in a notebook I never noticed beyond this point.

"Uh once I got home I remember the house phone noise filled my house with its nonstop ring, the other person on the phone would change my life forever when he came in.”

“And who was that person?" Gloria asked.

"Reginald Hargeeves, eccentric billionaire and caring father from what the public knew.." I rolled my eyes.

"So I'm guessing it wasn't really like that" she asked carefully.

"He was never a father really, more like a hard state-national basketball coach." She wrote that down.

"I guess it was a hard decision for my parents to make well, my mother. My father was ready to give me up as soon as Reginald stepped foot in my small house."

"And I'm sure they thought there was nothing bad about the offer they were given, he promised I'd be raised in a steady environment with the best schooling and my powers would be used for the greater good. And in exchange, my parents would get a large sum of money for my absence."

"What were you doing during this?" Gloria worried.

"I think I was just sitting right there next to my mom actually. I definitely didn't understand at that point what was happening to me. Still thinking about the events of that day.”

"And then I was being taken out of my only home in the blink of an eye. I resisted the people taking me, starting with screaming and then kicking and then running. Back to my mom's arms, Reginald himself had to pull me away from her. The deal had already been struck and there was no taking me back."

Now looking back at my hands I could only see small teardrops on my palms. Gloria reached for a tissue from the other side of the room. "Thank you," I said as I wiped my eyes.

"I like to think that my mom was upset that day but the memory has already started to fade as I reached adulthood.

You know after that day I was no longer 'Y/n L/n' no, I was known by my new name.. Zero Hargeeves."

..

I decided that was the end of my story, at least for now because I couldn't place the pieces together anymore. I was full-on sobbing at that point.

Gloria decided to bring up something more light to talk about next but I don't remember what it was because I'd zoned out and thought about the cat she'd told me about earlier.

The two hours seemed to fly by because the last thing I heard her say was if I didn't have anything else to talk about then that would be the end of the session. My legs seemed to move on their own as I walked out of that building. I would come back at the same time next week and honestly, I think therapy was for the best. I forgot about how I felt about all these things for the longest time.

I started the journey back to the bus stop, stopping to look in the windows of shops.

Shops like bakeries and bookstores and other things like that. Until I came to a stop in front of a store with a TV sticking out in the window.

My eyes scanned the screen and they went wide. The lady on the news had a somber expression as someone died. I was feeling sad for the person's family, but then I read the red-blaring headline.

The person who died was Reginald Hargeeves...

...

Aug 14 update:

If you'd like to be added to the tag list for rest of the series (starts at chapter 10) say taglist in the comments!

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Jealousy, Jealousy... | Part 7

A/N: don't even have a summary for this. oc is in love with gyu and gyu is in love with another girl but both are virgin losers and gyu is a horndog who would let oc do what she wants to him just as long as he gets to cum.

Word count: 9.8k

Genre: Smut, angst, fluff

Warnings: fem!reader, dom!reader kinda, riding, blowjob, power play, descriptions of a horror movie, inaccurate portrayal of photographers and creative directors, lots of cute moments

You’re on set with the boys shooting promotional pictures for one of their new songs that Yeonjun insisted you'd be perfect for given your affinity for all things horror. It’s called Frost and the concept for the shoot is supposed to portray guys who are hearing voices in their heads trying to drive them mad and they are attempting to fight against them before ultimately succumbing to them, and so you’re doing shots of them getting swayed by the voices contrasting with others where they express fear about what’s happening to them. 

Surprisingly all the boys suit the concept well, even sweet Hyuka was doing a remarkably good job. He was doing this manic laugh and shooting you evil looks that come out really well in the pictures. 

“Wow, Hyuka. These are really awesome shots.” You say, showing him the camera and he laughs. “You sound surprised.”

“I actually am. I didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Well, you know I’m full of surprises, baby.” He winks, flustering you. Who the hell knew he had it in him?

“Don’t flirt with my girlfriend.” Yeonjun scolds, playfully smacking him.  

“I’m just messing with her. You should’ve seen the look on her face.” Hyuka laughs his piercing laugh, as mischievous as ever, and you give him an indignant chuckle. “You little shit!” 

You raise your hand into a fist, pretending to threaten him, and he bolts, yelling a panicked bye over his shoulder. You shake your head, staring at his retreating form with fondness. 

You’re already done with Soobin and Taehyun’s shots, both of whom did really well too, but your favorite so far you have to say is Taehyun’s. The contact lenses you have him wear coupled with his naturally very intense gaze makes it so he doesn’t need to do much to come off as intimidating. 

“Is it my turn yet?” Yeonjun asks, kissing your temple. 

“No, baby, I’ve saved the best for last.” You coo, never missing an opportunity to compliment him, just so you can see the shy, pleased smile on his face, and he gives you just that. “Beomgyu is next.” 

“Oh, are you going to be okay?” His smile falls and concern replaces it instead, making you roll your eyes. “He’s not going to eat me.” 

“No, but I’m worried about you. You haven’t really talked to him for a while. Do you want me to come oversee the shoot?”

You kinda do. You are just acting strong for him. Fake it till you make it, right? He can’t hold your hand forever. “Don’t be silly. I know you’re starving. Go eat something and I’ll call you when we’re done.” 

“But–” He’s interrupted by his own stomach growling and you laugh, leaning up to kiss him. “Go eat, baby.” 

“Okay. I’ll be thinking of you.” He shouts as he leaves, bringing his hands together across his chest and mimicking a heart beating. 

You laugh again at his antics, but quickly stop when your gaze lands on Beomgyu. He’s sitting by himself on one of the chairs, eyes glued to his phone and blocking everything else out. You walk towards him, clearing your throat. “Beomgyu. It’s your turn.” 

He sighs, pocketing his phone and following you silently. You show him where he needs to stand before getting behind the camera. 

“Beomgyu, I want you to lean onto the mirror and look into it, smiling menacingly as if you’re taunting your reflection. We’ll do another one after that of you looking terrified as if you’re trapped in the mirror. So you should play off that. Got it?” 

He nods, resting his arm above the mirror and leaning forward, staring at himself with a smile.

“Okay, that’s not really what I’m going for. I’m not feeling any chills. I want a piercing gaze and a crazed smile. Try to have your mouth open as if you’re panting, like you’ve just won a fight. Don’t furrow your eyebrows and don’t tense up your shoulders.” 

Beomgyu tries again, leaning his head down so he’s glaring up at the mirror and puts on a lopsided smirk. But you’re still not feeling it. 

“You’re putting on an act, Beomgyu. I can see you thinking. I want you to really believe it. Wait.” You walk towards him, reaching up to fix his hair in the way you want. Or more like make it more messy and unhinged. “Let’s just push this over your eyes like this…”

You’re so used to doing this, you don’t even think about it, messing with his hair and making his makeup more smudged, streaking his eyeshadow here and blotting his lipstick there. It’s only when you’re done and realize he has been staring at you that you quickly step back. “There, all good.”

You try again and again with him, but none of the pictures come out like what you had in mind. You don’t get it. He’s usually much better than this. You’ve done plenty of shoots with him before, and he has never given you this much trouble. You keep trying to instruct him but his head doesn’t seem to be in it, too distracted by something else. 

Normally, you’d ask him what he’s thinking about that got him so out of it but you don’t think you can. Things are too awkward for you and him right now and you’re not sure if opening that can of worms here is the best idea, which all just makes you even more frustrated.

“Beomgyu, the concept is mad not sad.” You sigh, annoyed after what must be the hundredth bad shot. 

“Well, maybe if you gave better directions I would know what to do.” He snaps back, irritating you further. Beomgyu has never criticized your skills before and you don’t exactly take it well, the remark hurting more that it’s coming from him. He has always been a wall of unbending support for you so for him to call you out like this causes cracks in the very foundation of your sense of self worth. 

“If my direction was bad then how come all the others had no problem following it?” You hiss, getting defensive to cover the cracks up, but you quickly back down when you see him opening his mouth to retaliate. You’re not going to get into it with Beomgyu right now. You’re at work. You can’t ruin this for yourself. 

“Forget it. You’ve already wasted so much time. I’ll get around to you later.” You shut him down and walk off, not giving him the chance to argue. 

Were you being short with him? Maybe, but you’ve wanted an opportunity like this for a long time and you were doing so well before him. You need to prove yourself. The boys are gaining more attention every day and this shoot could be really good for your career.

You also have a more personal reason to be snappy with him. After all, he has been avoiding you ever since you’ve admitted that you’ve slept the night with Yeonjun and you’re fucking bitter about that. You don’t understand why he’s acting this way and it’s driving you up the wall. You can take the pain of him not loving you back. You can take the pain of him getting angry at you for stupid reasons. But to ignore you? That you can't bear. 

______________________________________

“Yeonjun, I need you to look more sharp. I want you to look at the camera as if you’re going to devour it. Don’t look so sweet. And move your right arm up like this.” You instruct him and he follows your lead flawlessly, so different from Beomgyu, and it slowly eases your nerves and allows you to get back in the mood. 

“Good. Keep your head down and look up at the camera with your eyes. Smile a little, no, not too much. We want you to look crazy, but not funny crazy.” 

He laughs at that, offended. “Hey!” 

You snap a couple of pictures of him laughing. You know, just for your own personal collection. “Sorry, babe. There is such a thing as overdoing it.” 

He pouts, acting sulky, and you take pictures of that too. 

“What are you doing?” He raises an eyebrow and you blush. “Doing my job?”

“Those pictures would never make it as promotional pictures and you know it.” He calls your bluff and you shrug. “They can make it as my lock screen though.” 

“I knew it. You’re so down bad for me.” He laughs and you scowl at him. “Shut up. Be professional.” You demand as if you weren’t using paid time to take pictures of your boyfriend for your own personal use. 

“Yes, ma’am.” He salutes you, “Do you think I could play the song on my phone? It might help me get more into the character.” 

“Sure, if you think it will help.” 

He pulls out his phone and plays the song, closing his eyes for a second like he does before doing a dance routine, Kai’s manic laugh from the song ringing around the room before Yeonjun opens his eyes and looks at you, completely transforming in front of you. 

“That’s really good. Keep going.” You encourage. You don’t even have to give him much direction after that, he does it on his own. You just give little modifications here and there but he’s embodying this concept so well by himself. 

“Really lost my mind. Really, really, really lost it.” He mouths the words, pressing two fingers to his head in a trigger motion before rolling his head around. 

“Remember to look at the camera, baby. Not all the time, I want some shots of you looking away so it seems I’ve caught you in the middle of it.” You keep shooting him, getting in different positions and angles to get the best shots as he gets into the music, channeling the darkness of it through him. 

“Now, I want you to snap out of it. Look around as if you’re trying to find the source of the voice.” You instruct and he does it as if a switch had been flipped. He has such a talent for this. “Grab your head and stumble around a bit as if you’re losing your balance. Good.” 

“Now look at the camera.” He looks up at you, eyes wide and filled with fear. You take a few shots before you lower the camera down. “Wow, baby, you did amazing. You’re such a good model.” You praise him and he gives you a lovely smile, completely changing his vibe once again and turning into the sweet boy that only you get to see. 

You smirk, grabbing his chin and making him look at you. “Does someone like being told he’s a good boy?” 

His breath hitches and his smile falls. Shit. You forgot that this is Yeonjun, not Beomgyu. He’s probably not into this. You let go of his chin and step away, an apology on your tongue, but he pulls you back, kissing you. “I do like it. Maybe when we’re done you can show me how much of a good boy I am?” 

Relief soothes your racing heart and you reach up to run your hand through his hair, tugging on the bright orange mess. “Only if you behave.” You brush your lips over his neck, making him shiver. 

“Guys, really? We have children present.” Soobin complains, pointing to Kai. 

“Hey, I’m not a child!” Kai protests in turn, “But I’ll agree to act like a child if it will get those two to stop. Seriously you’re worse than Beomgyu and Haeun." 

That last remark makes your face drop real quick. You're lucky Haeun was too busy to come to the shoot today. With how stressed you are, you might've snapped at her and Beomgyu and made a huge scene. You already almost did it with Beomgyu. You’re sure if she was here, you would’ve lost your cool.  

“Sorry, guys.” You step away from Yeonjun, clearing your throat. You look at Beomgyu to see him staring right at you and Yeonjun, and if looks could kill, you and Yeonjun would be dead now… wait that’s it! That’s the look you want from him. 

“Beomgyu, come with me. I think we can do your shots now.” You motion to him quickly, and Yeonjun gives you a confused look. 

“He’s got the look I want from him. Be right back.” You explain to Yeonjun, getting up on your toes and giving him a quick kiss, partly because you love kissing Yeonjun’s plump lips and partly to annoy Beomgyu further and get him more mad in order to get the pictures you want. 

___________________________

Things go much more smoothly this time. Beomgyu was giving you just the look you wanted, glaring at you like he actually wants to pounce on you. It’s great for the shoot, but bad for your heart.

“Now give me a smile.” You say and his lips move ever so slightly, shaped into a weird distorted smile that is so tense, it looks like it might snap into a snarl any second now. It’s the exact vibe you were going for and you didn’t even have to instruct him to do it. It was almost too spot on. 

“Perfect. Now grab your neck as if you’re trying to claw something out, like you can’t breathe.” Even that he does perfectly, fingers digging into his neck as if he’s not worried about his well-being at all. He’s doing it so well that you only take a few snaps before stepping in to quickly stop him. 

“Okay, that’s enough. We’re done here.” You can’t help but walk towards him, pulling his hand off his neck and inspecting the little marks he made there, smoothing your thumb over them as if you could make them go away. 

“What, I don’t get a good boy?” He asks and you snap out of your worried daze, stepping back. 

“Beomgyu…” You warn, annoyed at yourself for slipping. “Don’t start now.” 

“I guess he’s your muse now.” He mutters, looking away, and you follow his gaze to see Yeonjun looking at you. 

Is he? Yeonjun is a natural model–he has proven that today–while Beomgyu requires more prompting. Yeonjun is intense and chic while Beomgyu is ethereal and melancholic.They’re completely different from one another. Can you really compare them? 

You guess that’s a lie. Yeonjun can embody whatever concept you give him, but Beomgyu inspires you to make new concepts. He’ll always be your muse. 

You don’t tell him that though. It would only cause trouble. Instead, you deflect, “We need to do the group shoot now.”

You gather all the boys in one spot, posing them every which way you want, instructing them on where to look, how to stand and what expression to make. It’s a bit overwhelming making sure that they all look good at once, but you’ll have to get used to this if you wanna make a career out of it. 

You’re almost done with the shoot and you’re so proud of how all of you have done so far. You just need a couple more pictures and that’s it.  

“Soobin, look to the side and tilt your head a little to the right. No more. More. A little less. Yes, perfect! The rest of you stay like you are.” You take a few pictures like this, before you call out again, “Baby, look at the camera” 

When you say that, both Yeonjun and Beomgyu turn their heads to face you, and an awkward moment of silence passes before you stutter, “Yeonjun… I mean. Look at the camera, Yeonjun.”

“Awkward…” Hyuka sings and Taehyun elbows him in the stomach. 

You brush right past it, pretending that it didn’t even happen. Though your stammering and blushing doesn’t fool anyone. Thankfully though, it’s all over soon. 

“Okay, boys, that’s it. We’re done!” You cheer, exhausted but happy and confident that you’ve gotten all the pictures you needed. “Anyone want to see some of the photos?” 

They all gather to look at them with varying degrees of enthusiasm. As you scroll through the pictures, they oh and ah at their own shots while making fun of the others for any awkward ones. You expected nothing less from them. 

“Hey, how come your boyfriend got all the best shots?” Soobin grumbles, and you roll your eyes. “He got all the good shots because he posed the best out of all of you.” 

“Bullshit.” Taehyun interjects and Hyuka agrees, “Nepotism is what it is.” 

“Shut up, Kai. That’s not even what nepotism means.” 

“Oh yeah, then how come you gave him the best set and accessories?” He challenges and Yeonjun wraps his arm around you, “So what if she favors me? Are any of you giving it to her good every night? I don’t think so.” Yeonjun boasts, making you blush deeply. 

Whatever reply you were going to make gets cut off by Beomgyu slamming his drink down and storming off. 

“Someone’s in a pissy mood.” Taehyun mutters and Kai adds, “Probably pissed off that all the good shots went to the photographer’s boyfriend.” 

“Drop it, Kai.” Yeonjun snaps and the younger guy raises his hands up in surrender. 

“Ignore them, baby. I think all the shots are stunning.” Yeonjun says, holding you.

“You really think so?” 

He nods, rubbing your arms soothingly, before grinning. “But mine are the best, of course.” 

“You’re all assholes.” You grumble, pushing him away but inside you’re thankful he diffused the awkward situation. 

“Let me make it up to you. You wanna grab something to eat? I’ll buy you your favorite fried crap.” He offers and you clap, excited. “Oh, yum!" 

“Can I come too, baby?” Kai asks, making kissy faces at you before running away as Yeonjun takes off his shoe and throws it at him. 

_________________________

“Junnie?” You call out and he blinks, looking up at you. “Are you okay? You’ve been quiet for a while now.” 

“I’m just a bit worried.” He sighs, making you frown. “About what?”

“I think we’re really close to being signed. We’re having promising talks with a couple of record companies and the whole process is really stressed out.” 

“But isn’t it a good thing?” You ask, confused. Didn’t the boys want to be signed for a long time? Is he having second thoughts? 

“It is, but we all know the stories of artists getting scammed by companies and having their masters stolen, or having their creativity stifled by the execs, or losing their sound… as the front man I really wanna make sure to do this right. I don’t want to let my members down.” 

“Oh, Junnie, I know you’ll do your best.” You reach out to grab his hand, squeezing in comfortingly. He’s such a good hyung to his members, always so reliable and trying to make everything easier for them so they don’t have to stress like him. “But you can’t put all of this on your shoulders only. The boys need to contribute to the decision too. After all, it’s their future too.”

“I know but it really bums them out thinking about all this. They’re here for the music, you know? Not the corporate dance.” 

“Neither are you. They’re big boys. They can handle it. They need to do this too. They need to take on part of the responsibility.” Your hand moves up his arm, stroking it. It’s not fair for him to take on all this burden by himself. Besides, it’s not good in the long run. The boys need to make a joint decision or conflict and blame could arise later. “I can’t have you losing your hair over this. I don’t really like bald guys.” 

Yeonjun gives you a betrayed look. “Hey! Are you saying you won’t be with me if I was bald?” 

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.” You confirm and he scoffs, pretending to be offended. “You’re so fake.” 

“Probably. But I took your mind off it for a second there.” You tease, using the same trick he used on you when you were crying. 

“I think you’re gonna need to do a lot more to take my mind off it.” He tells you suggestively and you roll your eyes. 

“Eat your heart attack-inducing food first, then we’ll talk.” 

He grabs a drumstick and bites off a piece of it like he’s in a cartoon, making you burst out laughing. 

"You know what I noticed?" He asks after chewing his food, and you hum in acknowledgement, prompting him to go on, "Your style has changed since we've started dating. It's become edgier and more trendy. If I didn't know any better I'd say you were trying to impress me."

You blush, feeling caught. "Good thing you know better then."

"Well, since I know better, I won't say that I would find it really cute if you were trying to impress me or that it would make me feel really special."

"Well, if I were doing it to impress you, it would be because you're really special.” You say sincerely, looking him right in the eyes, before shrugging, “Luckily, this is all hypothetical." 

You continue to stare at him as he laughs. 

“What?” He asks, and you tell him, "You're doing it again." 

"Doing what?" He gives you a confused look. 

"Laughing in that adorable way that makes your nose scrunch up and makes me wanna tackle you to the ground and kiss you all over your stupid face." 

What happens next is so groundbreaking, you almost can't believe your eyes. You actually make him blush. And your stupid heart that has been beating non-stop for Beomgyu, falters in its incessant pace a second to let Yeonjun in. 

___________________________

It’s going good with Yeonjun. Despite the flirty and confident persona he portrays for his fans, behind closed doors he’s shown you many sweet and shy moments. He’s attentive to you despite how busy he is with his career and his clear passion for music. And he’s really, really sexy. 

Yes, his flirtiness can make you feel insecure sometimes and it does make you wonder if he’ll get sick of you one day and jump to someone prettier and new like guys in a band so often do, but you think you could overcome that feeling with time. You’re just being insecure. It’s part of his job. He’s not actually this cocky playboy. He has to act that way to bring in the fans.

Except he kind of is a playboy. He has dated many other girls before you and he has broken up with all of them. Who is to say that that won’t happen to you too soon? Who knows when he’ll get sick of you? Maybe he’s just waiting to scope out his next girlfriend before breaking up with you. 

No, you’re being paranoid. He’s just entertaining his fans. It means nothing. Just because he dated a lot before you, doesn’t mean you’re just another notch on his belt. This doesn’t mean anything, especially not his innocuous interactions with his fans. 

Yeah, you’re not bothered at all watching him deliver not-so-subtle pick up lines to his horde of fangirls and watching them giggle and swoon over him. You don’t care that he lets them touch him and hug him. You don’t even notice the panties they throw on stage for him or that they ask him to sign their bras. It’s all good. 

“You okay, doll?” Yeonjun throws his arm around you, nudging you. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t let me keep you from your girlfriends.” You mutter, pushing his arm off, and storming off. Okay, maybe you are a little bothered.

You hear footsteps behind you and quicken your pace but he catches up to you eventually. Damn his long legs. “Hey, hey, what was all that about?”

“This may come as a shock to you but I don’t exactly enjoy you flirting with other women.” You grit, your anger bubbling up in your stomach and forming acid around your bitter words. 

“You know I’m just doing my job.” He defends himself and you scoff. “Your job is singing. Not getting their panties wet.” 

“That is still part of the job. You think all those successful bands don’t get where they are by appealing to the fangirls? You really think it’s just about the music?” He may have a point but that doesn’t make you feel any better about his behavior. At the end of the day he is still acting inappropriately around girls who aren’t his girlfriend.  “No, you’re right. I’m sorry. Want me to go invite some of them back to your room for some quality fanservice?” 

He laughs at that, and it’s far from the sweet laugh you adore. “You have no right to act jealous. Not when I have to watch you everyday staring longingly at your best friend. Your best friend who you live with and have messed around with before by the way. How do I know you won’t fall to your knees the moment he asks you to suck him off?”

"Fuck you, Yeonjun." You tear up at the unexpected attack, and turn around to leave. You can't believe he is throwing this in your face. 

“Wait. I’m sorry.” He holds you back, brushing your hair away from your face and seeing the tears budding in your eyes. “I don’t mean to be an asshole. I know you don’t like the way I act but it’s my job. My livelihood depends on it. I’m not doing it just for fun. You know that.” 

You look away, conflicted. Yes, you do know but that doesn’t make it suck any less. “Do you have to let it go that far though?” You pout, images of your boyfriend with his arm around random girls or letting them touch his face or hold his hand flashing behind your eyelids. 

“I will try to tone it down.” He concedes and you finally look at him. “No letting them kiss you?” 

“No.”

“No sexual innuendos?” 

“No.”

“No signing their bras?” 

“So just their breasts?” 

You go to leave but he pulls you back flush against his body. “I’m kidding.” He kisses you and you reluctantly let yourself fall into the kiss. God, why do you pick the hardest boys to love? 

Speaking of which…

“And I’m sorry for what I said about Beomgyu. I trust in you not to do that just as you trust in me not to cheat. But I’m not sorry about the part where I don’t like you living together.”

“What?” Your frown. What is he trying to say? 

“You’re in love with the guy. Living with him won’t allow you to move on. You need to move away from him to let us move on.” He clarifies, not really making it easier for your brain to compute. 

“Oh."

"We can never move forward in our relationship if you're holding onto him." He presses, seeing your resistance to his words. “Come live with me. Leave whatever this thing you have with him in the past and take the next step with me.” 

"But he's my best friend. We promised each other we'd stay together." You say as if that means anything to him, and the look he gives you is what an adult would give to a naive child thinking their family pet really went to live on a farm. "Are you going to live together even when both of you are married?"

"No. But it's too fast. He's so freaked out about everything changing. This is gonna send him into a breakdown." You resist still, maybe because some of what you’re saying applies to you too. You’re not sure if you’re ready to do this. 

"Don't you think that's a little weird?” Yeonjun challenges your statement, forcing you to examine your unusual situation with Beomgyu for the first time. “You two have an unhealthy attachment to each other. You’re not together and believe me no boyfriend or girlfriend is gonna tolerate how you two are acting. I know I can't."

But you can’t think about it too deeply right now, not on the spot like this, not when there is a plain threat in his words. "Are you giving me an ultimatum?"

"No. I'm just asking you to set some boundaries." 

Is that the same thing? You sigh. "Can you… just give me some time to think it through?"

Yeonjun doesn’t like that. "You know I'm right."

"Please." 

What he’s asking you is huge. With how Beomgyu isn’t talking to you, moving out of the apartment might spell complete doom to your friendship, and you don’t know if you are ready to risk that yet. Maybe you can work it out while still living with Beomgyu. Maybe you can find a way to move forward with Yeonjun while still retaining your friendship with Beomgyu. 

"Fine." Yeonjun backs down for now, but this is clearly not the end of it. 

____________________

When you get home, you find a strange surprise waiting for you… A pillow fort?

"What's this?" You ask Beomgyu suspiciously and he beams at you, pulling you towards the structure he made. "Come on in. Come on in!"

You let him take you inside with him, seeing it lined with pillows and soft fuzzy blankets and all kinds of snacks you could ever need. The only light illuminating the inside coming from the small laptop filled with movies for you to watch. 

"What's all this for?" You ask, very confused at the sudden change in his attitude. What has gotten into him? 

"Well, I know I've been an ass–"

You don't mean to snort but you can’t help it–interrupting him–and he shoots you glare, albeit a playful one. 

"I know I've been an asshole," He repeats, not deterred. "But I was worried about what Yeonjun was gonna do to you and I was frustrated you weren’t listening to me. I’ve seen him blow through girlfriends many times before–maybe not in a way that is meant to intentionally hurt them but he just doesn’t seem to be ready for something serious yet. It always seemed like the girls were way more into him than he was into them and that eventually leads to the relationship breaking down and the girls getting hurt and I didn’t want that to happen to you. I didn’t want you to get hurt like that.” 

His words echo your own doubts. You’ve been wondering about this exact yourself. Yeonjun is great. He’s fun and sweet and he makes you smile, but if you let yourself fall for him, will he be able to love you too? 

Is that even a fair question to ask? Doesn’t everyone go into relationships not knowing if the other person will end up liking them the same amount? And can you really be the one wondering about this when you’re the one in love with your best friend? 

You don’t say anything though, just letting Beomgyu continue, curious about where he is going with this. “But in my attempt to try to prevent that I've stupidly gone and hurt you myself. I got angry and vindictive and I lost sight of what I was trying to do… I also was being selfish because I didn’t want to lose you to him. I’m so used to it just being the two of us and it made me a little jealous that suddenly he’s taking all your time and attention. I used to be your number one guy.” 

You look at his pout, trying miserably to fight down the tears his words are springing up. He is still your number one. That’s the problem. 

“You said all of this already.” You say quietly, looking down and trying to hide your glossy eyes from him. 

“I know, but what I didn’t say is that I don't know if Yeonjun will stay like this forever or if he's going to break your heart and force me to cut his balls off, but I wanna be there regardless.” He proclaims, sounding exactly like the best friend you terribly missed, the obvious joke not taking away from the seriousness of what he’s saying. “I don’t want to lose you over this. I want us to go back to how we were before all this mess. Do you think we can do that?" 

You look up at him, his pretty face shimmering and swimming around in your tearful vision, making his already ethereal features appear celestial. He looks at you as if you could ever deny his request. How can you ever say no to him? 

"Yes, Beommie." You finally say, letting the tears fall. 

"Hey, hey…" He coos, grabbing your face and kissing your tears away. "Don't cry. You know seeing you cry will just make me cry too." 

“I can’t help it. I missed you, you idiot.” You wail, and he pulls you into his arms, rocking you back and forth and rubbing soothing circles on your back. 

“I missed you too. So much. You don’t even know.” You hear his voice falter and you know he’s crying too. 

You stay there for a while–you don’t know how long–until you and him have calmed down enough to be able to string together words again. He’s the first to pull back, but only so he can look you in the eyes. 

“You look so pretty when you cry.” He whispers, wiping your tears away and you cover the way your heart skips a beat at that with a cough, pushing him away to give yourself room to breathe in something that isn’t him. 

“Shut up.” You mumble, wiping your tears away with your sleeve before looking around awkwardly, trying to change the subject. “So what movies do you have for us?"

Thankfully, Beomgyu follows your lead. "Top gun of course!' 

You groan. 

"I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I got you one of those foreign horror movies you love so much." He shows you that he chose a French movie called Martyrs. 

"Aw, you really do love me." You exclaim, covering your heart with your hand.

“I know. I’m an idiot, aren’t I?” He mutters, sitting down and motioning for you to do the same. You sit down next to him, leaving a small gap between you. 

“Hey, what are you doing?” He asks, and you look at him in confusion. He rolls his eyes and opens his arms to you. “You can’t have Movies and Cuddles Monday without the cuddles.” 

You hesitate for a second, wondering if you really should do this. Is this too intimate? Would this be considered cheating on Yeonjun?

No, you’re being ridiculous. People cuddle with their best friends all the time. You can do that. 

“Right.” You get into his embrace, and he holds in in both arms. 

“Okay, let’s start the massacre.” 

_____________________________

“I think I’m gonna throw up.” Beomgyu groans, burying his face in your neck as screen shows the main lead being flayed alive. 

“Well, don’t do it on me!” You squeak, trying to pull away to hide the goosebumps that have erupted on your skin when his lips brush against you, but he’s holding onto you too tightly.  “Don’t go. You made me see this. I’m traumatized.” 

“You’re the one who picked the movie.” 

“Because I wanted to satisfy your blood thirst.” He mumbles and you laugh. “I don’t even like gore. I prefer the subtly creepy.” 

“Yeah like that game you like where the character takes a pill and entrails fall from the sky.” 

“Hey, entrails can be subtle.” You grumble, relaxing back in his arms. “Now shut up. I wanna see the ending.” 

Beomgyu sits in silence, holding onto you tightly as the character called Mademoiselle leans over the flayed woman to hear what she has to say after achieving martyrdom. You watch with bated breath, not feeling any of the anxiety you’re supposed to feel as the cult members ask the Mademoiselle what the main character told her–too relaxed with the way Beomgyu massages your scalp with his fingers. If you were a cat, you’d be purring right now. 

Even Beomgyu keeps his mouth shut as the Mademoiselle grabs a gun and shoots herself, taking the secret with her to the grave–the both of you seeming to be in a trance. It’s only when the credits roll does he speak up. 

“I can’t believe they didn’t tell us the secret to the afterlife.” Beomgyu complains softly, not making any move to disentangle you from his arms,and neither do you.

“Yeah right, like they would tell us the secret to the afterlife.” You snort at your naive friend, “Besides the movie isn’t about that.”

“Yeah, and what is it about, genius?” He challenges. 

“Um, it’s clearly about the exploitation of the working class so the rich can achieve knowledge and even more power–no it’s about the exploitation of women of the working class.” 

“You just pulled that out of your ass.” 

“Maybe. But that could be right.” You shrug, your shoulder once again brushing against his lips. “Do you have a better theory, idiot?” 

“Yeah, my theory is that the director just wanted to make the most disgusting movie possible and made up this whole martyrdom story to justify the torture inflicted on the characters, and that’s why he couldn’t come up with an actual answer to what happens after death.” 

“Maybe that’s the point. We were never meant to know the answer. Knowing the answer renders life and its struggles meaningless. That’s why the Mademoiselle killed herself.” 

“Or maybe Anna told her a lie that she knew would fuck her up and get her to kill herself. Perfect revenge.” 

“That doesn’t make sense. At the start of the movie we see that when Lucy got revenge on one of the families, it still wouldn’t make her guilt go away so clearly the movie views revenge as a non-viable option.” 

“Hey, when did you become so smart? I thought Movies and Cuddles Monday was supposed to be about mindless consumption of media and making stupid jokes about plots we’re not smart enough to comprehend.” He looks at you in suspicion and you meekly answer, “I may possibly have started reading some books–”

He gasps. “Books? Dear lord, save us.” 

“You’re just worried you’ll stay the only dumb one.” You poke his nose teasingly and he tries to bite your finger, making you withdraw it with a giggle. 

“Doesn’t matter. Smarts are for ugly people. I’m too pretty.” 

You smile fondly. “Yes, you are.” 

He wraps his arms around you even tighter, letting out a small contented hum as the credits roll, neither of you moving to start another movie or turn off the computer. How can you when it makes you feel so safe and content, like you could want for nothing else in the world as he strokes your hair with one hand and your arm with the other.  

Every emotion you've been working so hard to smother comes roaring back. And you realize that you and Beomgyu are not just friends. Probably can never be just friends. This is why Yeonjun insisted you move out. You can't be this close to Beomgyu without falling back into your old habits. If you wanna give Yeonjun an honest chance, you need to get some space. 

“Beomgyu… do you ever think about living with Haeun?” 

He frowns. “Why? Did she say anything to you?” You almost laugh at his look of terror. Almost. If you weren’t so terrified of what you have to say to him.

"Yeah she told me on one of our weekly get togethers." You snort, then hesitate. “It’s just… Yeonjun wants me to move in with him.” 

He pulls away from you, face hardening, and your body is suddenly left defenseless against the cold chill in the air. "What did you tell him?"

You want to tell him that you said No. You want him to take you back in his arms. Even if he doesn’t love you back, this can be enough for you, right?  "I said I'd think about it."

"Think about what? This is way too soon. You can't just move in with him. What if you break up? Then you'd be left homeless because you were so stupid as to move in with a guy you've only been dating a few months." 

His anger is like lashings to your cold skin. Why does he keep doing this to you, making you let your guard down before attacking you once more? Does he not know how hard this is for you too? "Beomgyu, you said you weren't going to be an asshole anymore." 

"I just don't understand why you'd do something like that." His frustration is palpable. He is looking at you as if you’re just doing this to hurt him. 

"Because Yeonjun doesn't like me living with you after we messed around."

You shouldn't have said that. That just makes him angrier. "And you’re just going to do whatever he tells you to do? Are you one of those girls who does everything her boyfriend tells her?"

His accusation pisses you off. He’s treating you like you’ve committed a crime for wanting to move forward with your boyfriend. "No, but he has a right to be weirded out by us living together. I know I wouldn't be happy about him living with a girl he hooked up with."

"Oh yeah, and what's next? He's too weirded out by us hanging out? Talking? Looking at each other?" 

"You're being overdramatic."

"Am I?" He shouts, “This is why I didn’t want you to date him. He is taking you from me.”

The fucking audacity for him to say this as if he hasn’t been terrible to you ever since you started even expressing interest in Yeonjun. This would never have happened if he had been an actual goddamn friend to you. 

“He isn’t taking me from you. You’re pushing me away.” 

“You know he’s only going to hurt you?” He says, hitting you right where it hurts. It’s one thing for you to doubt your relationship with Yeonjun, but it’s another thing entirely for your friend and his to keep telling you that it’s never gonna last. 

Does he really have no faith in you? Does he not think you’re pretty enough, good enough to keep yeonjun’s attention? Does he think it’s impossible for Yeonjun to actually love you? 

You start tearing up again. "Why are you being like this?"

“Because it’s what he is. You’re making a huge mistake. You're choosing this guy you just started dating over our years of friendship."

You shake your head. "Why does it have to be either or. Why can’t I have my boyfriend and my best friend?"

He lets out a condescending laugh. “I’m not the one making you choose!” 

But he is. He has been making you choose since the beginning. He just doesn’t like it because for once you’re not putting him and his ridiculous demands first. 

“He is not making me choose.” You defend Yeonjun and yourself. “He just doesn’t want us to live together.” 

“You really think he’ll end it at that? You don’t think he’ll demand more bit by bit? Next it will be ‘I don’t like him touching you.’ then it will be ‘don’t hang out with him so much’ and then ‘why do you even need to see him. We can just stay in.’ and before long he’ll have completely phased me out!”

“Well maybe there should be some boundaries. We did hook up together. It’s normal for him to feel insecure. And maybe we’re a bit more touchy than other friends are. Maybe I should only be cuddling with my boyfriend and that only my boyfriend should be kissing me…” You’re saying this more to yourself than to him. Even what happened earlier wasn’t really appropriate. It could be for completely platonic friends but you know that’s not what you and Beomgyu are. Not for you, at least. 

“See? It’s already happening!” He exclaims, and you sigh. There is no point arguing with him. He’s too upset to see reason. “I’m sorry, Beomgyu…”

"Forget it. Forget all of this." He stands up and takes the pillow-fort apart. "Enjoy living with your boyfriend." 

__________________

You quickly gathered a few essential items that you'll need along with a change of clothes before you texted Yeonjun to come pick you up. You'll get the rest of your stuff later. You just can’t handle being in this house anymore. 

"Are you okay?" Yeonjun asks when you get into his car. 

"Yeah, it's just Beomgyu is really mad at me." You sniffle, trying to hold back your tears. 

"Of course. That fucking idiot." Yeonjun curses and you agree. "Such an idiot."

"Want me to go beat him up?" He offers but you shake your head. "I really don't think you two having a cat fight is gonna lift my spirit up."

"Hey!" He shouts, offended, but he can't help but give you a smile–his sweet smile that you love so much. 

"But that might." You smile back, wiping your nose before bending over to give him a kiss. 

"Didn’t know I'd be eating snot today." He says as he pulls back and you smack him. "I wiped before I kissed you!" 

He laughs and tries to kiss you again but you push him away. "No. I've revoked your right to kisses." 

“Is that so?” He quirks an eyebrow up and you nod, indignant. 

"And what if I told you I have some great news that will make you wanna kiss my face off?" 

“What?” You look suspiciously at the massive grin on his face. "You know the director of Elements magazine?"

"Do I? Of course! She's one of my inspirations." You gush, excited at what he could possibly have to say about her. 

"Well, I've been talking to her about you–"

"What?” Your face falls, terrified. “What–what would you talk to her about me for?"

"She's interested in your work." He tells you and you give him an unflattering snort in disbelief.  "Yeah, right. What do I have to show her?"

"She's actually seen the shoot you did with us and would like you to send her more of your stuff because she thinks she may want you to do a pictorial for the magazine."

“Shut up.” You gape at him. You? Do a pictorial for Elements magazine? "Oh god, I think I'm gonna pass out." 

“Please, don’t. I don’t know how I’d be able to explain why I have a passed out girl in my car to anyone who saw.”

You shoot him a glare, but there is no heat behind it. "How do you even know her?”

"I've done some modeling for her before." He shrugs as if that isn’t a big fucking achievement, "I told you, networking is everything."

"You're amazing." You breathe out in awe. 

"I know." He replies confidently and you suddenly shriek, kicking your feet in excitement. "Oh my god, I can't believe she liked my stuff!" 

"Why wouldn't she? You’re great." You turn to him, a huge smile on your face before you bend over the console and give him a big kiss. "You are so getting laid."

"That's why I did it." He jokes, starting the car before pulling out of the parking spot. 

___________________

"Welcome home." Yeonjun says, putting your bag down in his bedroom. 

Yeah, you guess this is home now. You look around, trying to process the fact, and Yeonjun comes up behind you to wrap his arms around you. “You can redecorate a bit if you want. I’ll give you a whole corner of the room.” 

You turn around in his arms, wrapping your own around his neck. “You’re very generous.” You kiss him slowly, deepening the kiss as you go, pushing your tongue into his mouth as your lips move against each other. “My good boy.” 

“Oh, are we doing this?” He raises an eyebrow at you. 

“You deserve it.” You push his jacket off before slipping his white tank top over his head. As soon as his chest is bare, you attack your lips to it, kissing it all over. Your lips tingle as it comes in contact with his warm skin over and over again and you feel his little moans vibrating through his chest as he slowly gives into the pleasure, shivering a bit when you wrap your lips around one of his nipples. 

Your hands trail down his body, grabbing at his waist on the way, kneading it, before moving to his pants. You unbutton and unzip them slowly, rubbing the back of your hand over the bulge there, making his breathing stutter. 

“Baby…” He pouts at your teasing, and you lean up to give his pretty lips a kiss. 

“Want it, darling?” You ask, continuing to brush your hand over him teasingly and he nods. “Okay. Just because you’ve been so good to me.” 

You put your hand in his boxers and pull out his cock, stroking it to full hardness while kissing his addictive lips. 

“You’re so good to me, Yeonjun. You deserve to be pampered.” You tell him, twisting your hand over the head of his cock as your lips go down his neck and along his chest until you have to get on your knees to go further. You kiss his abs gently before opening your mouth and giving his skin a playful nip which makes him jump. 

“Hey, that’s not pampering.” He protests and you laugh, licking the reddening spot soothingly as you continue to tease his dick with your hand. 

“I was just thinking about how you seduced me with this at the party.” You tell him and he grins. “So I was–ahh–right? It was my rock–fuck–hard abs that got you?” 

It’s hard for him to keep a straight face when your fingers are twisting so sinfully around his hard cock. “Maybe I ran into you on purpose t-to–shit–give me the chance to take off my shirt in front of you.” 

“Diabolical.” You hum, kissing all over his tummy, getting closer and closer to his aching cock before moving up again, just to tease him, then repeating the process all over again until he starts dripping in need. 

“Baby, please…” He finally calls out when he becomes so needy that your palm gets all sticky with his arousal. 

“I got you, baby.” You finally take him into your mouth, the taste of him familiar by now. 

Over the few months you’ve been dating Yeonjun, you’ve gotten very acquainted with what he likes and how he likes to be touched. You learn what makes him tick and where he is sensitive. It’s no longer entirely nerve-wracking to be with him. There are some things you can do and say that you can rely on that are guaranteed to get him in the mood

But today is different. You’ve never tried to take the lead from him before. In a way, you’re both more confident and more nervous–more confident because you know how to do this better, you’ve done this a lot with Beomgyu… and more nervous because you’ve never done it with Yeonjun. What if he doesn’t like it? 

Your movements are slow, meant to tease and build up rather than push him over the edge. Your tongue swirls slowly around his flushed head and laps up any precum leaking from his slit while your thumb and index finger make a circle around his cock and slowly move up and down the bottom of his shaft, working him up until he’s begging again. 

“More–please, I need more.” He breathes, voice tight and needy. 

It’s a lot different from Beomgyu… If it was Beomgyu, he’d be crying and whining loudly, his mouth spouting off all kinds of filth in an attempt to get you to throat his dick. He’d be squirming and trying to push his dick further down your mouth, bucking his hips into your hand so you’d jerk him off faster… 

But Yeonjun is not Beomgyu. He stands there, as still as he can, and lets you do what you want. 

Only interrupting with a quiet plea when he can’t take it anymore. Is that better? Is it worse? You don’t know. All you know is that you need to get Beomgyu out of your mind, stop comparing them. Yeonjun is yours, Beomgyu is not. Yeonjun is here for you to touch and taste and feel, Beomgyu isn’t. Yeonjun has opened his heart up to you, and it’s insulting to think of another guy when you’re with him. 

So you get off your knees and kiss Yeonjun, letting yourself focus on him and only him. You push the rest of his clothes off his body, and let him do the same to you, letting his hands wander and squeeze and caress as he does so–because you’re his. 

You lead him towards the bed, pushing him on it and climbing on top of him, lining yourself up with his hard cock before catching his gaze, seeing the way he lies still and waits for you to do, before you sink down on him. 

He lets out a deep sigh when you’re seated on his hips, his cock buried all the way inside you. 

“This what you wanted, darling?” 

He nods, resting his hands on your thighs, not pushing or pulling, just letting you take your time. Is it a sign of patience and letting you take the lead or is it a lack of passion and indifference? These are the thoughts that plague you. 

But you’re too much of a coward to ask, so you just lift yourself up and fall down on his cock, establishing a steady rhythm. He lets out quiet moans and pants, responding to the way your hips move and your pussy works over his cock, his eyes alternating from staring at your form to rolling into the back of his skull when the pleasure becomes too much. 

“Is it good?” You ask and he nods. “So good.” 

Still restrained. Still subdued. But you take it. You take it and you run with it, bouncing faster on his cock, your gaze stuck to his face, eating up every little twitch and sigh that escapes him, so focused on him that you neglect your own pleasure, only noticing when his right hand brushes up your thigh and his thumb grazes your clit. 

“What are you doing, baby?” You ask, hand circling around his wrist but not pulling it away. 

“Don’t wanna cum alone. Want you with me.” 

Is it really you domming him if he can still do whatever he wants? You don’t know but you don’t have to decide right now. You can just take it slow. You can work things out the kinks bit by bit. 

“That’s a bit quick, don’t you think?” You venture to tease him, hoping he’d give you the response you’re looking for, and he does… somewhat. “Can’t help it. You just look so sexy bouncing on my cock. You should dom me every day.” 

You groan, thighs burning as you ride him faster, needing him to really mean it. “Don’t talk like that.” 

“Like what?” He purrs, his thumb still circling your sensitive nub. 

“Like you’re still in control.” You finally push his hand away, pinning his arms next to his head, but maddeningly, he just smirks up at you. 

“You want the control, you’re going to have to take it, doll. I am not going to just show my belly and give you the lead so easily.” 

“You’re insufferable.” You hold his wrists with one hand and use the other to wrap around his throat, not cutting off his circulation but just holding it tight enough to make a point. 

“That’s more like it.” He gasps, craning his head back to give you an easier purchase on his neck. “I’m close.” 

“Why should I let you cum?” You challenge, digging your fingers just a little more into his neck, clenching your pussy just a little tighter around his cock. 

“Because you like it when I empty my balls inside your little pussy.” He sucks in a sharp breath, his control slipping just a little bit, and you latch onto that. 

“I do like it, but what I like more is making bad boys cry.” You threaten, slowing down your movement until you’re barely riding him. “I’m sure it would feel just as good getting off your cock and making myself cum on my fingers. Just seeing your needy cock all hard and red with no relief would be more than enough to get me off.” 

He frowns. “You wouldn’t…” 

You make a show of getting off his cock and he quickly cries out. “No, wait. Okay. You win. I’ll be good.” 

You raise an eyebrow at him before going back to riding him fast, not giving him the chance to challenge you again. “Well, that was easy.” 

He does well by shutting up this time, his full lips pulled into a hilarious pout. 

“Are you close?” You ask him when his eyebrows begin to furrow and he nods. You let go of his wrist, telling him to keep them there as if you could’ve stopped him if he wanted to overpower you. 

You use your now free hand to rub your clit, pushing yourself towards your own high. 

Yeonjun doesn’t like that. “I could do that for you.” 

He tries to reach out to touch you but you let go of his throat and swat his hands away. “No. Only good boys get to touch.” 

He gives you a little whine–a semblance of what you crave from him. Maybe the rest will come in time. 

“I’m close.” You tell him, fingers desperately moving over your pussy as you ride him. “Want you to cum with me.” 

He nods, his hips moving for the first time under you, helping the both of you over the edge. 

“Yeonjun–fuck!” You throw your head back, eyes squeezed tight as your body shudders with release. Yeonjun hands reach out to hold your hips flush against his as he empties himself inside you, a long groan slipping from his pretty lips. 

“Fuck.” You gasp, falling down when your orgasm leaves you, and Yeonjun opens his arms to take you in, holding you close to him, your hearts beating rapidly still. 

This whole day has been an emotional rollercoaster for you, and the release of pent up energy leaves you spent, your body all but becoming boneless in Yeonjun’s embrace. 

He kisses the top of your head, his hand smoothing through your wet hair as the both of you catch your breath. You feel your eyelids getting heavy with exhaustion, the heat of his embrace now a familiar night-time companion, and you find yourself drifting off to sleep. 

"Thank you again for choosing me for the Frost shoot." You mumble, eyes closed. He may have just changed the whole trajectory of your career. 

"No need to thank me. It was all Beomgyu's idea." 

____________________

A/N: one more chapter to go. as always your feedback makes me update faster so don't be shy to drop in a message. the author note in the last chapter will contain a link to my patreon for the alternative ending for the losing boy so look forward to that

and for the final time

Taglist: @blxxsss@sanasour@tinkw1nks@lol6sposts@zuzuhasablog@beomsl@seolis-world @stantxtorurmissingout@wonwooz1@yaorzu-blog@allylikesdabee@rkivezzs@malieno@leviathanlee26@yomomas-stuff@kurisaiyunobara@girlwholovekpop@zuzuhasablog @viaaasdiary @ho3forkpop@skzvcr @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n @izzyexe @boomfrogg @kpop-cakepops-recs @chronicallygyu @girlwholovekpop

[miniteezez]

To Be Loved, Is To Be Saved

Hongjoong x (fem)reader

WC:13.2k

Warnings:manipulation, fake religion, false gods, violence, abuse, harassment, creepy men, bad language, talk of trauma

Disclaimer: in no way am I trying to say that any /REAL/ religions are bad or hurtful in any way. This is purely fiction and something that I made up. Please do not take offence.

Synopsis: You stumble into Hongjoongs life, just as your own is getting too much. He’s everything you’ve been told is a sin. Turns out, it’s exactly what you need.

“And what can I do for you today pretty?” Those words stuck to your mind like hot glue. His nails tapped against the wooden counter, the ring finger painted a scratchy black. Snake bites were reflecting the dull lighting and moving with the way his lips pressed together. Taking a deep breath, you clasped your hands together and looked at the male anxiously.

“I’d like a lip piercing. Please.” You added on quickly, not wanting to seem rude. He hummed, dragging his finger along the price list and explaining each one. Though, you weren’t listening, fully mesmerised by the man before you. He was so different from anyone you knew. Arms inked up, hair split in two and rings adorning most of his fingers. Truly, you thought he was so cool. Noticing your look, he chuckled and leant forward.

“Where do you want it sweets?” Blushing heavily, you pointed to the left side of your lip. The man pulled out a form, handing you a pen to sign it. Once that was done, he gave it a stamp then looked at the time.

“Well, Wooyoung is just with a client right now. So, it’ll be about ten minutes.” He explained, pulling out a stand with different jewellery displayed.

“You can either get a ring or a stud. We have gold, silver or steel.” Looking over them closely, you felt yourself pouting slightly before standing straight again.

“Like yours…” he grinned at your response.

“Black steel hm? You have good taste, sweets.” Again, you blushed, quickly pulling your card out to pay.

“That’s just fifteen.” The man let you know, getting the card machine ready. Meanwhile, you were confused and, after taking another look at the price list, you frowned.

“What? No it should be more right?”

“Hm, can’t I give a pretty girl a discount?” He asked, tilting his head with a witty smile. You stood there, cheeks glowing in disbelief whilst he chuckled. Taking your card, he tapped it for you then flipped it quickly.

“So, (y/n)..” gaining the information of your name, he gave it back, “Like I said, it’ll be a minute, wooyoung takes forever.” He rolled his eyes playfully, muttering something about him being a flirt.

“What’s your name?” You questioned shyly, playing with the tips of your acrylic nails.

“Hongjoong.” He spoke, resting his elbows on the marbled, wooden surface. It suited him, you thought whilst checking the time on your phone.

“Wow, I haven’t seen a phone like that in years.” Hongjoong scoffed, observing its chipped screen. You shifted awkwardly, shoving it back into your bag.

“Yeah, it’s my dad’s old Nokia.” You admitted, leaving out the part that you had, in fact, taken it without permission. In fact, you were in the tattoo studio without permission. If your parents knew you were there, you’d be sent for a review by their pastor. And the thought of that made you shiver. Sensing something was off, hongjoong cleared his throat.

“You good, sweets?” All you did was give a brisk nod.

“I’m guessing your parents are quite old fashioned huh?” Pursing your lips, you shrugged slightly and subconsciously dug your nails into your palm.

“You could say that.” Truth be told, it wasn’t that at all. But you doubted a stranger wanted to know of your recent woes. A door opened to the left of you and out came a man with longer, black hair. He waved off a customer then turned to you expectantly. It must have been wooyoung, he looked almost too friendly. Before hongjoong could say anything, you looked at him almost scared.

“Could you do it?” Even though your voice was quiet, he heard you loud and clear. A smile grew on his face, as he instantly ducked under the counter.

“Woo, you hold the front. I got this.” He grinned again, earning a salut from wooyoung who moved to the desk. Placing his hand on your lower back, hongjoong lead you into the sterile room and locked it behind the both of you.

“If you could just hop up on there.” He motioned to the hospital style bed, covered by a fresh paper towel. The room smelt of a bleach like substance, the walls a stark white and a mirror on the back of the door. To the side, there was a basin, with a counter that hongjoong was busy getting everything ready on. Now you were trembling slightly, hoisting yourself onto the bed and letting your legs swing. Hongjoong had begun speaking, but you weren’t listening. All you could focus on, was the needle lying still in its packaging.

“-then you’ll feel…hey, (y/n)?” Seeing the look on your face, he stopped and turned to you. Gently, he took hold of your hand. You snapped your head in his direction, eyes wide and hardly blinking. He smiled softly.

“Nervous huh?” Again, you nod.

“I only have my ears pierced. Will it hurt?” Your voice was so low and quiet. It was obvious you were really scared of the needle. You just prayed he wouldn’t laugh at you. Instead, he simpered.

“It’s honestly just a scratch. Won’t hurt one bit.”

“You promise?” You asked doubtfully.

“I do. And hey, if it does, I’ll give you a hug ok?” Even though his deal was an odd one, you nod and shook his hand. He took his pen, tilting your chin and dotting the under part of your lip with precision. Catching your eye, he smiled warmly.

“How about you close your eyes?” He suggested and you shut them tightly almost instantly. It made him chuckle, carefully placing the clamp on your lip. Sensing it was about to happen, you felt yourself go stiff.

“Relax yourself for me pretty. That way it’ll be less painful okay?” Hongjoong explained, waiting for your shoulders to ease up. Taking a deep breath, you slowly relaxed.

“That’s it, good girl.” Your heart fluttered with his praise, hardly catching the way he was counting down. Then, suddenly, you felt a slight sting then, nothing. He was quick to push the jewellery through and step back.

“All done for you, sweetheart.” You slowly opened your eyes, looking in the mirror and smiling brightly. He was right, it didn’t hurt at all. Though, you were almost tempted to pretend it did. A hug did sound nice.

“Didn’t hurt right?” And there it was, his promising words. Turning to him, you decided against lying. He was probably only joking anyway.

“No it was fine…” you grinned, allowing him to help you off the table and out of the room.

“So uh, does that phone work enough to text?” hongjoong suddenly asked, smiling at your surprised face. Nodding quickly, you handed it to him and watched as he put his number in there.

“If you ever wanna hang out, I’m free at the weekends.” You blushed at his suggestion, humming in understanding. Once you had collected your ointment, You waved goodbye and braced yourself for what was to come at home.

———

It went exactly as you knew it would. Sitting in your bare room, you pulled your knees up to your chest and hugged them tightly. Your body shook slightly, heart pounding and ears pulsing from all the screaming. Throat now dry, you swallowed thickly and dugs your nails into the flesh of your legs. Why did they have to change so much? If it wasn’t for that stupid man, your parents would still be like their old selves. So loving and nurturing. Your father saw you as his pride and joy, his little girl. He’d take you to the moon and back if you needed. And your mother, your biggest supporter. There for you no matter what. But that was all gone now. Sniffling, your hand shook as you pulled out your phone and clicked down to your new contact. Ignoring your bloodied knuckles, you sat there for a good few minutes, trying to figure out what to text. Was there even any point in texting? Surely he didn’t want to be bothered. Then again, he obviously had given you his number for a reason. So, against your better judgement, you began typing.

You: thank you for doing my piercing today :)

Short and sweet, but a good start.

Hongjoong: I’m hoping this is (y/n) and not the greasy biker I gave a nose piercing to?

You: yes yes. It’s me, sorry.

Biting back a giggle, you mentally scolded yourself for not even dropping an introduction in there.

Hongjoong: it’s good to hear from you sweets, I was beginning to think you wouldn’t text.

Had he been waiting for you to message him? The thought made you blush, rushing to text back honestly.

You: sorry, I didn’t want to seem weird.

Hongjoong: weird? Why would it be? I’m very happy you did, has anyone seen your lip?

You: my parents.

Hongjoong: tough crowd I’m guessing?

You: yes.

Hongjoong: well, if it means anything to you, I think it looks really good on you.

Heat rushed to your cheeks, eyes scanning the message repeatedly. A giggle slipped past your lips, hardly noticing you hadn’t replied.

Hongjoong: hope I haven’t scared you off.

You: oh no I’m sorry! Thank you :)

Hongjoong: no need to thank me sweets ▪️

Your brows furrowed as you stared at the block square, seemingly punctuating his sentence.

You: what’s that square?

Hongjoong: oh yeah, I forgot your phone was from the Middle Ages. It’s an emoji.

You: hey! It’s not that old!

Hongjoong: you’re cute.

Again, you blushed a smile gracing your lips. No one had ever been so nice to you, not for a long time. It warmed your heart. But on the other hand, you could hardly fathom that any of them were true. Maybe he was just messing with you? Though, he seemed so genuine.

Hongjoong: I was wondering if you’re busy on Saturday?

Glancing at the grey, pixilated text, you frowned now. Saturdays meant community lunch. You hated it. All the people from the community would gather for a fancy meal. They discussed various, controversial topics that always made you so uncomfortable. The chance to finally miss it, was definitely not escaping you.

You: I usually am, but I can be free.

Hongjoong: wow, I feel lucky. Well, how about we meet up in the park?

You: sure thing, what time?

Hongjoong: how about 12.

———

Taking one final look in the mirror, you worried your outfit was either too much or too weird. You knew your parents didn’t approve of your style. But you had managed to save enough to buy a few cute items. This included the black, plaid skirt you were wearing that day, and the grey tight fitted turtle neck. As of recent, you’d always had to opt for a long sleeves because of your parents. Them and the dumb “pastor”, if you could even call him that. He was a manic in your eyes. Just an average man with outlandish views and a convincing glint in his eye’s. Either way, you tied up the laces of your boots and grabbed your bag, then headed downstairs.

“Skipping on the dinner are we?” Your father caught your attention, making you turn to him slowly. He was having his bow tie done by your mother. Since joining this “organised religion”, she’d become almost like a maid to him. All you did was nod at him, taking in their overly formal attire. The pastor did live in a mansion, but still, it was too much.

“Of course you are, such a pity. To waste your youthful soul.” Your mother sighed out in disappointment. She stepped back and looked you up and down with a shake of her head. “What has happened to my little girl? You look so unholy.” The woman barely knew the meaning of that word. Still, you shrunk back and just shrugged, turning to leave. Except, your father gripped your arm, twisting you back painfully.

“Answer your mother, stupid girl.” He spat with anger. Knowing to keep calm, you took a deep breath and slowly moved away, bowing your head.

“I’m sorry. Mother, father. But I’m going out today. If you could excuse me.” Without waiting, you headed for the door briskly, not missing their snide remarks. You knew what they thought of you, it hurt too. But what could you do? They’d been fully corrupted.

It was light out, few clouds dotting the pastel sky. You loved the end of spring. That calm, early may breeze brought you out more. Even if you usually only sat in your garden. Coming to the park chosen by hongjoong, you made your way to the centre, where a large, stone water fountain sat. It was very old, a few chips here and there, mossy patches in various places. Yet it was pretty, unique and oddly serene. You took a seat on the edge, gazing down at all the loose pennies tossed in by wishing hopefuls. Sometimes you wished you could be so open minded, yet you felt trapped in your sorry life. Clear water was falling from the decorative points at the top, creating a peaceful sound that filled the surrounding area. You were grateful to be there, even if you thought the boy wouldn’t show up. Why would he? In your mind, it was hard to believe. Your parents told you that no one would want to be associated with a girl of your kind. Making you sound as though you were a sinner. In their eyes you were.

“Well, hello pretty.” Jumping, you let out a slight squeak and turned to find hongjoong. He chuckled.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” He was smiling, still looking as cool as the other day. Wearing a crumpled band T-shirt, ripped jeans, combat boots and an oversized hoodie. You were jealous.

“That’s okay, I was distracted.” You admitted shyly, standing yourself up to face him. He hummed, glancing up at the fountain.

“It’s lovely here, huh?” Hongjoong said, taking in his surrounding before focusing back on you. You nod, toying with the hem of your skirt. He simpered, watching your fidgeting fondly. “So I was thinking we could get ice cream?” He suggested, stuffing his hands into his pockets. You perked up, looking at him hopefully.

“That sounds great!” Realising how eager you may have sounded, you stepped back and pressed your lips together.“Sorry, I mean, yeah that’s a nice idea.” Hongjoong looked down at you and scoffed lightly.

“Why are you apologising sweets? Come on, let’s go, I know a good place.” He grinned, turning on his heel with you following shortly after. The walk to the pallor didn’t take long at all. And on your journey hongjoong spoke to you about his week at work, and all the odd clients he’d served.

“We even had an old lady come to get a more…intimate piercing. But wooyoung did that thankfully.” You couldn’t help but laugh at his stories, already feeling more relaxed than before. It was strange how quickly you’d began to forget your troubles around him. Acting more like yourself than you had in years.

“But see, woo is such a flirt. He can flirt his way through any appointment. Which is why I’m glad I got to do yours.” Hongjoong explained, glancing at you. Confused you looked back up at him.

“Why? He wouldn’t flirt with me, would he?”

“Of course he would. He does it to everyone. But he’s ten times worse with pretty girls.” He let you know, stopping in front of a small shop.

“What’s that got to do with me?” You asked, looking up at the pink and brown canopy fondly. Hongjoong frowned a little, placing a tentative hand on your shoulder.

“Everything.” He stated, leading you inside briskly so you couldn’t ask anymore. You were greeted by pastel pink walls, littered with retro ice cream posters and neon signs. There were a few wooden tables and chairs, only one being occupied by two elderly women. At the top of the store was a glass fridge, containing over twenty different flavours of both ice cream, and sorbets. Hongjoong walked to the cash desk, looking over the options without much thought.

“What are you thinking?” He questioned, watching as your eyes wondered the casing. It was a tough one. There was too many.

“I really don’t know. What about you?” Looking at the taller, he hummed pointing at a colourful tub.

“Probably sherbet and cherry.” He said, clearly having been there before. You couldn’t help the small pout on your lips.

“Two flavours?”

“Yeah of course. Get whichever you want.” Something about the way he spoke made you feel at ease, smiling as you decided.

“Then I’ll get chocolate chip and raspberry.” pulling out your card, hongjoong gently pushed your hand down and both ordered, and paid before you could protest. He smiled, collecting your cones off the worker and sitting at one of the tables in the window.

“I could have paid, don’t wanna be a burden you know?” You sat opposite and carefully took your ice cream from the male. He observed you for a moment, taking a small bite of his own treat.

“A burden. I asked you on a date, it’s hardly-“

“This is a date?!” You cut him off, eyes wide in surprise. Hongjoong scoffed and laughed.

“Well yeah, I hope so. That was my intention. But if you don’t want that, then that’s fine too.” You blushed, listening to him. He wanted it to be a date?

“No I do I just…I’ve never been on a date before and I didn’t think anyone would you know, ever ask me. But I do…” you rambled slightly, busying yourself with the ice cream. Hongjoong never took his eyes off you, tilting his head to watch your flustered actions.

“I’m flattered, to be your first date. I find it hard to believe that you’ve never been on one though.” He let you know, taking more bites which you found odd. Did his teeth not hurt? Either way, you responded.

“Why?”

“Well, you’re probably the prettiest girl who’s ever walked into my shop.” He said nonchalantly, not expecting you to choke on a chocolate chip. Your cheeks felt hot, quickly covering your mouth.

“You’re too kind hongjoong. I highly doubt that. But thank you.” You laughed a bit, trying to calm yourself down from his unexpected compliment. Hongjoong frowned, not liking your dismissal of what he was saying. You saw this and looked at him with worry and decided to carry on speaking.

“Well Uhm, I actually have been asked out before. But I said no.”

“Oh? Why?” He leant forward, clearly interested.

“Because, the guy is a creep I can’t lie.” You both laughed at this, him still deep in thought. It was as if he was trying to work you out, figure out what was beneath the surface.

“How so?” Oh no. You had two choices. Be honest and risk him thinking you were from a family of freaks. Or lie. Though, you hated lying. With a sigh, you turned your head away.

“He’s the son of a pastor. And his dad is even worse.” You admitted, biting into the slightly soggy cone you were holding still. Hongjoong bobbed his head slowly.

“You’re religious?”

“No. Not at all.” You clarified fast, horrified at the thought of being part of that. Humming, the man decided to brush it off and started asking more simple questing. Favourite colour. Favourite music. Just the basics so you could really get to know each other. The conversation flowed naturally, like you had known each other for years.

The sun was beginning to set, wind picking up slightly and making leaves twirl through the air. Hongjoong walked beside you, both going at a leisurely pace.

“Do you like being out at night?” He asked, hands tucked away in his pockets. You nod at him with a smile, feeling a lot more free than you had in a long while. The man watched you with a soft look in his eyes. Spotting a bench beneath a street lamp, he took your arm and pulled you to sit down.

“So, would you like to go out with me again?” You could feel the nerves radiating off of him and smiled to yourself.

“I’d like that a lot yeah.” The way his eyes lit up almost made you blush, it was strange seeing someone genuinely want to spend their time on you.

“You can pick our next date then.” Hongjoong chuckled, watching the panic take over as you wracked your brain for ideas. What would make a good date? You had no clue?

“I don’t..I’m not-“

“Hey relax…” Hongjoong simpered, moving closer and placing a hand on your thigh comfortingly. All you did was blush more at this.

“You can text me, there’s no pressure. Anything you want. Even if that’s just…sitting here again. I don’t mind.” His compassion made your heart beat erratic.

“Coffee?” You mustered up, thinking of your favourite downtown cafe. His snakebites reflected off of the streetlight, that infectious smile resurfacing.

“Yeah I’d love to get coffee with you. Is there cake?” His question made you giggle, nodding your head in confirmation. He laughed along with you, rubbing your leg in effort of creating a bit of warmth.

“Let me walk you home?” He offered, and who were you to refuse?

——————

The floors were white, the ceiling tiles were white, the shelves, railings, hangers. Everything was white. The clothes that lined this section of the store, were indeed also white. It was starting to hurt your eyes. Even so, you had no choice but to be there. Like a zombie, you followed the grisly, old lady you’d come to know as Elder Candace around the aisles. Her heels clicked against the ground almost piercingly, the noise making your teeth catch your lip ring, in efforts of a distraction.

“Are you even listening to me child?” Candaces’ squeaky voice brought you from your mind, your eyes coming to meet hers. She shook her head with a privileged huff. You thought of how funny you must have looked with this group of women. Dressed far too formal, in pearly long dresses and their stilettos. Whilst there you were, short black skirt paired with a plain black T-shirt, a grey cardigan and your boots as per usual. You almost smiled, feeling like everyone’s stereotype of the family disappointment.

“Not really no.” You mumbled in response, at least deciding to be honest with the old lady. She stopped, along with all her little minions, turning around glaring down at you.

“Then pay attention, we’re here to help you see our lords vision. His ways are the key to our future in the promise land.” As she repeated her holy script, you felt nauseas. Oh how you wished you could have met with hongjoong that day. Initially, after waking up that morning, you had tried to call him to see if he wanted to go and get breakfast. The coffee date had gone so well, you had stayed out well into the night and lost count on the amount of caffeine you’d had. In his company, you felt one hundred percent yourself. Since then you’d text all the time, you even went and met him on his lunch break most days. Wooyoung had started teasing you both, yet you found it flattering. However your mother was in your room, taking your phone and forcing you out with Elder Candace. Speaking of her, she had continued to look through the clothes, trying to find you something they deemed holy. The store was empty, yet you still felt hot and bothered. Probably due to the fact you were hungry, thirsty and extremely on edge. You knew at any moment these women could lash out at you. Using their “religion” as an explanation to be violent, and using your “demonic” looks as an excuse. Though, the thought of them seeing hongjoong, imagining their scared faces made you smile to yourself. He was everything they despised. Tattooed, confident, black and white hair, had the guts to show uniqueness and personality. The women would probably scream at him. So distracted by your funny scenario, you weren’t watching where you were going and walked straight into one of the clothing racks. It twisted awkwardly and fell into an unsuspecting you man holding a baby grow. Now panicked, you quickly bowed your head.

“I’m so, so sorry.” You apologised, wasting no time in crouching and picking up the items hastily.

“Hey it’s okay, don’t worry.” The male smiled at you kindly, helping to pick up the ugly, white clothes and hang them back up. He had longish black hair framing his well structured face. You thought it was pretty, noticing some was pulled back into a pony tail.

“Still, I should have been paying more attention.” Guilt was clear in your tone, your hands clasping together. The tall man simply shook his head, but before he could speak you felt a bony hand grip at your arm.

“(Y/n). Get away from this man. He is not one of us, he is one for the devil with those aesthetics.” She spat out, giving the poor boy a look so cold you thought it might freeze him. Even though he looked unfazed, your stomach twisted awfully. With her hold on you tightening, she yanked you away harshly.

“You’re never going to become pure! You evil little cretin. Im going to file a report for this, talking to a man. Are you a whore?” You were completely taken aback by her outburst, swallowing down your emotions with difficulty. You didn’t want to be there, you wanted to scream and run, yet you felt there would be no use.

“No i ju-“

“Enough! I didn’t want to believe it but your mother is right! You’re a traitor to our saviour. Dressed like a fiend, with your spiked lip and your inappropriate clothes.” Candace had a look in her eye that made you shiver and shrink back. Though her hold on you meant you couldn’t even move an inch. “You’ll be damned to the burning depths for all your sins, imagine how betrayed your parents are going to be! You filthy littl-“

“(Y/n)?” Candace froze, stopping mid-sentence to look passed you. Her eyes widened in horror and you felt as though all of your prayers had been answered. Turning around, relief flooded your veins upon seeing Hongjoong. He stood there, eyes piercing into the woman holding you like a hostage.

“Get away from here boy, this is none of your concern.” Candace tried to sound authoritative, but there was a shake in her voice that couldn’t be missed. He raised a brow at her, looking her up and down with a grimace. Letting out a breath, hongjoong looked at you and held out his hand.

“Come on.” The simple demand was easy to want to follow, and maybe he really did scare her, because Candace let you slip away easily. You waisted no time in taking hold of his hand, relaxing as Hongjoong pulled you into his embrace. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you buried your face into his shoulder, basking in the security he provided. Meanwhile, he continued to stare at the gang you were with, watching as they scurried off almost comically. Once they had dispersed, he enclosed his arms around your waist protectively and sighed.

“Are you okay?” His voice was gentle, a hand moving up and down your back. All you could do was nod, not wanting to let go.

“I told you it was her.” That voice. Glancing up, you saw the man you had bumped into earlier.

“(Y/n), this is Seonghwa, my close friend. He said he bumped into you before and well, said you looked like you were in trouble.” Hongjoong explained, keeping a hand on your waist. You’d never felt so grateful for embarrassing yourself before.

“Thank you.” You uttered, giving them both a small smile.

“Come on, let’s get out of this weird place.” Hongjoong moved to hold your hand, heading for the exit without a second thought.

Sugar melted into your tea within a second, as you stirred the spoon around the red mug slowly. The cafe was quiet, only a few people coming in and out. To your left, Hongjoong sat with his iced Americano . Opposite sat Seonghwa, sharing a few worried looks with his friend. You weren’t really saying anything.

“Who was that woman?” Hongjoong asked, hoping for you to open up to him.

“I have to call her Elder Candace. She’s a disciple.” You replied, eyeing up the muffin that was kindly bought for you.

“Is this the same religion you told me about?” You nod to hongjoongs question.

“Yeah, I mean, she’s just a crazy old lady really. But he’s filled her head with all his spiel. And she really believes everything he says.” They listened to you intently.

“Sorry, what?” Seonghwa was right to voice his confusion, making you sit straight.

“About five years ago, my grandmother passed away, she was in hospital with a chronic illness and she couldn’t hold on any longer. My mother was heartbroken, of course, and my parents decided to relocate and start fresh. Here.” They gave you a sympathetic look. “We’ve never been a religious family, never been to church or prayed. Never. Though my mother was struggling and my dad wanted an outlet for her. That’s when he found this website…” you trailed off, remembering everything in detail.

“It was simply called ‘FaithsKey’, with a stupid little tagline. It’s something like ‘helping you find the key to faith and the glorious promised land’. But my dad was drawn in by the comments, everyone apparently seemed happy. And that’s what he wanted for my mum.” Hongjoong moved a bit closer, slipping his hand onto your knee comfortingly. Leaning back in your seat, you looked down at his hand and admired his rings. You couldn’t help but to toy with them as you continued. “So they joined the site. It was a slow integration. I barely noticed at first. They would go one Friday a month to his speeches. Then every two weeks. Then every Friday. Until it became a regular thing. I’d be alone more and more. I was confused. I didn’t know where they were or what they were doing.” You glanced between the men, hongjoong lacing your fingers together. Seonghwa rested his elbows on the table, giving you tight lipped smile.

“Then one day, they pulled me out of school, told me that it would corrupt my pure soul. They started homeschooling me with one of his schemes. It was all nonsense. No maths. No science. Teachings about purity and how to achieve the most pure mind and status. I hated it. And I told them that. That’s when everything really changed…”

“What do you mean?” Hongjoong pressed, thumb running across your knuckles soothingly. You looked at him, lips slightly downturned.

“My father slapped me. After hearing that I hated the program and wanted to return to a normal college, he hit me. He told me I was a disgrace, that I was betraying them and failing the one true path to purity. Then that never stopped.” You could almost see Hongjoongs heart drop to his stomach, his hand tightening in yours. “They took away my phone, my laptop. They forced me to every meeting and every event. The community lunches every Saturday. The galas every six months. It was torture. But when I turned twenty they let up a bit. I have a bit more freedom now. Though I had to steal an old phone.” You also laughed at how ridiculous the truth was. But the men weren’t laughing. Instead, hongjoong pulled you into his chest, an arm around your shoulders steadily. You rested your head against him, letting out a shallow breath.

“Who is this man?” Seonghwa spoke up, voice bitter.

“I don’t know his real name, they call him the saviour. Or sometimes even the lord. It’s not like they’re praying to god. They pray to him. It’s sick. I’m not and never will be religious but even so, it’s wrong. And he’s raising his son to be his prodigy, the next best thing.” This just left the pair with more questions.

“Is this the same son who asked you on a date?” Glancing up at Hongjoong, you nod shortly recalling the events of that day and shivering. Subconsciously, you shuffled closer to the man holding you.

“I say asked, he more demanded. As did my parents. It was a big thing. They’re desperate for me to be a part of it, to give my soul to them.” Becoming more annoyed, hongjoong shook his head.

“How can you put up with that?”

“I had nowhere to go. No one to run to. I’ve just been on my own for the past few years. It feels like I really lost my parents the day they went to that first meeting. I miss them.” Tears began to cloud your vision, and you desperately tried to blink them away, yet it was useless. All you wanted was to feel wanted once again. Hongjoong lifted his hand, softly turning your face into his chest, as if to shield from the world around you. Keeping his hand on the back of your head, he pet your hair affectionately.

“It’s okay, you have us now. You can relax. I’m not going to let them keep hurting you, I promise.” Somehow, you actually found yourself believing him. His voice was like honey. “Are you family at home right now?” He asked, wiping your cheeks softly. You shook your head, sniffling slightly. “How about we head to your house, pack a bag of your things, then you can stay with me for a while?” Hongjoong suggested,

“Are you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure, I don’t really like the idea of you being there. Not after everything you just said.” His words were certain, already having made up his mind. You felt the weight fall off your shoulders in an instant.

“But won’t I be in the way?” You worried, even if you loved the idea, you wanted to feel reassured.

“No absolutely not.”

“Trust me, his house is massive.” Seonghwa boasted happily, causing the shorter to roll his eyes half heartedly.

“I don’t think she meant physically in the way, hwa.” You giggled at them, picking up your mug once again.

“Oh! This means you have to come tomorrow night!” You looked across at Seonghwa confused. “Ah, it’s mine and my fiancés baby shower! We’re hosting a little get together.” He explained, eyes filled with pure joy.

“Oh so that’s why you were in that store?” You realised, earning a nod back from them back.

“I’d love to go.” They seemed pleased with your answer.

“Let’s go before your family get home then.”

———

It was strange, seeing Hongjoong in your bedroom, picking up your various hello kitty plushies. You smiled, packing a duffle bag up with essentials.

“Don’t worry too much, we can go clothes shopping tomorrow.” Hongjoong reassured, taking the bag frown your hands. “Bring some of the plushies. They’re cute.” He decided, watching you scramble to pick a few up.

His house was massive, Seonghwa wasn’t joking. You stared wide eyed at the building, mouth agape. A vintage, blank and White House. With pillars at the entrance and many French windows.

“Are you rich?” You asked, following Hongjoong into his home. More in amazement than anything. He chuckled, leading you up a centre staircase. It was dark but beautifully decorated, the floors a dark wood and the wails painted cream; with different pieces of art hung up.

“Why? Do you want a sugar daddy?” Hongjoong joked, leading you along the dimly lit corridor. You hummed in amusement.

“Only if it’s you.” Your comment caught him off guard, causing him to pause and look at you. His cheeks were flushed, a half laugh passing his pierced lips. Shaking his head, Hongjoong pushed open a door.

“After you, pretty.” Giggling, you slipped in past him.

“This is my room.” He let you know, following behind you. It suited him, you thought whilst walking around. With a king sized bed, that had a mahogany frame and navy sheets. The walls were black, with a white skirting board and a few signed posters hung up precisely. All the furniture matched, the drawers and built in wardrobe the same shade as the bed frame. In the corner of the room sat a guitar and leather sofa. Opposite his bed, a large flatscreen TV. There was a fluffy throw at the end of his bed, plus unlit candles along his dresser.

“It’s really nice, tidy.” You commented, spinning on your heel to face Hongjoong. “Where will I stay?” You asked timidly, his face dropping slightly. He took a step closer, letting your bag sit at the foot of his bed. Taking your hands in his own, Hongjoong looked at you sheepishly.

“Well, I thought you could stay in here. With me?” He suggested with a nervous timbre. Usually so confident, it warmed your heart to see him more vulnerable.

“Really? You don’t mind?”

“I don’t mind in the slightest. I want you to, if I’m being honest.” He grinned, bringing your hand up to kiss your knuckles. “Now, how do you feel about having a cosy, little movie night?”

“I’d love that.” You simpered, shivering lightly. Hongjoong moved across the room, pulling out a sweatshirt from his wardrobe.

“You can wear this, the bathroom is just through there okay?” He pet your hair affectionately before heading downstairs.

After freshening up in his en suite, you put on his sweatshirt and smiled to yourself in the mirror. It was big on you, and very soft inside. You folded your clothes neatly, walking out of the bathroom and putting them in your bag. Spotting a lighter on the bedside table, you took it and carefully lit the candles in the room. They were apple scented, a nice surprise. The wicks crackled away, some nearly burnt out. You just thought that made it smell better. The whole room smelt comforting though, a mix of smoke and cologne, now with apples too. Hoisting yourself up onto the bed, you looked around happily. You wandered if it was considered rude to light the candles. Or if it would be rude to turn on the Tv.

“You look cute.” Hongjoong suddenly appeared in the door, having changed into a pair of sweats and a vest. His tattoos were more visible now, black ink looking too good on his tanned skin. He strolled over casually, taking place on the bed beside you. Noticing how rigid you were, he laughed a little. “Relax, (y/n). Get comfy okay?” Hongjoong helped you under the duvet, propping the pillows up for you.

“I lit the candles, is that okay?” You gazed up at him, his eyes already on you. He leered, getting under the cover and pulling you into his chest.

“Of course it is. You can do whatever you like here.” You simpered, nuzzling against him naturally. His arms wrapped around you, holding you close.

“Whatever I want?” You asked, peering up at him with big eyes. Hongjoong stared down at you, throat bobbing. Sadly though, your phone began blaring out its ringtone, ruining your happy moment. With a groan, you reached over to get it and instantly frowned.

“It’s my dad.” You said, unsure of what to do. Hongjoong took the old device from you, ending the incoming call. There were hundreds of missed calls and texts, they were after you.

“You don’t have to contact them anymore, okay? In fact,” he started, opening his drawer and pulling out a box before handing it to you. “I got you this.” Hongjoong looked at you proudly. Taking the box, you gasped upon seeing the newest iPhone.

“Hongjoong this is so expensive!” You gaped, looking up at him in shock. He just smirked cockily, giving you a shrug.

“Money doesn’t matter, I want to be able to text you normally.” He jabbed, poking your waist. Feigning offence, you scoffed.

“Was my brick not good enough for you?” You questioned sassily. Hongjoong moved towards you, cupping your cheek.

“No actually. It wasn’t. You deserve the best.” Face red, you looked at him bashful, unsure of how to act. He tilted his head, inching forward ever so slightly. As much as your heart was racing, you couldn’t pull away, enjoying the closeness. His eyes searched your face, landing on your lips like a target. Tentatively, Hongjoong closed the gap and pressed your lips together softly. Time slowed as he kissed you, your arms subconsciously winding around his neck. Finding yourself instinctively getting closer to him, his hand trailed down to your waist as you parted.

“Was that okay?” He questioned quietly, thumbing your side soothingly. You nod with shy smile, toying with the hair at the base of his neck. Hongjoong smirked lightly, brining you against his chest. There was a shared warmth between you, a real, true element of finally belonging.

———

Just as he’d promised, Hongjoong took you shopping the very next morning. He was far more eager than you’d expected, excitedly pulling you into all his favourite alt shops. Not that you were complaining, it was great to finally shop for exactly what you wanted.

“Hongjoong I have six skirts in my basket already.” You giggled as he picked up another. A short pink, pleated skirt with black bows on the waist.

“But it’s cute, and it’ll suit you perfectly love.” He said with certainty, adding it to your basket without a second thought. You huffed, shaking your head and picking up some T-shirts. His arm snaked around your waist, leading you over to another section filled with graphic sweaters. After looking around, you picked out a couple then gazed up at the man beside you.

“I think this is enough Joong.”

“You sure? I’ll buy you whatever you want.” He clarified, eager to make you happy. Simpering, you cupped his cheeks and pecked his lips affectionately.

“I know you would. But this is more than enough, I promise.” There was a slight flush to his cheeks, a grin on his lips. Hongjoong, ignoring your reluctance, payed for everything and head out into the mall.

“I’m so hungry.” He complained and pursed his lips. “We don’t have to be at Seonghwas until four, wanna get food?”

“Yes please.” You smiled in response, trying and failing to take the bag from him. Instead, he took your free hand and guided you into a bakery on the floor below. Sitting in a booth, he placed the bag down on the opposite side before sliding in with you. You were really enjoying just how clingy he was now you were “officially his”. Picking up the menu, you rested your head on his shoulder as he read it aloud.

“-coffee and walnut cake, Victoria sponge, white chocolate and raspberry, chocolate orange, mango-“

“Chocolate orange.” You cut in quickly, making the man laugh. A waitress came over, taking your order quickly. Hongjoong even remembered your drink preference and ordered for the both of you. He laced your fingers together, resting your hands on his thigh.

“Do you want your nails done? They’re outgrown.” You scoffed at his observation. “Not that you look bad, I’m just saying, it might make you feel better.” He chuckled, his thumb running over your knuckles softly. Nuzzling your cheek against his shoulder, you bobbed your head.

“Mhm, pink and black?”

“With hearts.” He pointed to your index finger. “I’ll pay.”

“No you won’t. You’ve done enough.” You almost whined, gripping his hand a little tighter. Leering, Hongjoong just pressed a chaste kiss to your temple. “I won’t take no for an answer, let me spoil you.”

———

You arrived at Seonghwas just after four, looking and feeling better than you had in years. Hongjoong had indeed payed for your nails, along with everything else. He was really stubborn. Seonghwa was over the moon to see you both, taking you both into the lounge. A few people greeted you, but you only recognised Wooyoung. There was a slightly taller man with him who said hello, and two very tall men who were sat off in a corner looking through all the opened gifts. On the couch sat a pregnant woman, Seonghwas fiancé.

“Thank goodness another girl.” She joked, offering you the seat beside her. Giggling, you sat there and introduced yourself to her. The woman was thrilled when she found out you were Hongjoongs girlfriend.

“We didn’t come empty handed don’t worry.” Hongjoong said, giving her a pretty pastel gift bag. She opened it excitedly, gushing over the three Jellycat bunnies you’d chosen earlier that day, along with the cute dresses Hongjoong had already bought.

“(Y/n)!” Wooyoung bound over, stealing you away easily and pulling you over to his little group. “Guys look it’s (y/n)! The girl I told you about!” He almost yelled but no one was phased at all. “Hongjoong is like, obsessed with her.” He boasted, your cheeks turning red.

“I dunno about that.” You laughed shyly, avoiding the eyes of these new people.

“Don’t embarrass her woo.” One man spoke, his deep voice catching you off guard. Wooyoung whined.

“You’re no fun Yeosang. I thought we were besties. You’re supposed to back me up.”

“We’re not disagreeing with you, but look at the poor girl.” The other laughed. “I’m San by the way.” He shook your hand curtly.

“He is obsessed though, he never stopped talking about you in our group chat.” Wooyoung continued, pulling out his phone to prove a point. Rolling your eyes, you nudged him playfully and made him put the device away.

“Drink?” You yelped in surprise when someone suddenly spoke by your ear. Turning, you saw another young man, with dark brown hair looked at you blankly.

“I’m ok, thanks?”

“That’s Jongho. He’s quiet like that.” San cackled at your scared expression. Jongho just shrugged and went to sit with Yeosang.

You spent around fifteen minutes with them, listening to their constant petty arguments. It was fun but very loud. Glancing back, you saw Seonghwa and Hongjoong sat on the couch talking casually. Meanwhile, the lady of the hour was over by the food with one of the taller men and a girl you didn’t know. Slipping away from Wooyoung, you perched on the arm of the sofa behind Hongjoong. Noticing you, Hwa gave you a kind smile before resuming his conversation. It was if he could detect you, because Joong leant back against you almost immediately. You grinned, running your fingers through the pale section of his hair, noticing how much had actually outgrown.

“I think you need your roots doing babe.” You mumbled once there was a gap in the talking. Tilting his head back, Hongjoong raised his brows.

“Yeah I know, maybe we could do it together?” Liking that idea, you nod happily and wrapped your arms around his shoulders.

———

A few weeks had passed, Hongjoong had been kind enough to let you work with him and Wooyoung. On the front desk, allowing for more customers and a better logging system. For your first payment, they decided to either let you get a new piercing or a tattoo. Hesitantly, you’d gone with the tattoo, choosing a floral piece for your upper thigh. Of course, your boyfriend had been the one to do it, not letting Wooyoung anywhere near you. It was beautifully done though, and hardly hurt, in the comfort of your new home too.

Currently, Hongjoong was pulling everything out of his bathroom cabinet. You sat on the edge of the tub.

“How do you have so many hair dyes?” You chuckled in question, watching as he inspected every pot.

“Well, I get bored. Luckily I have bleach too.” He stated casually, eyes lighting up at the pack he was holding. Shaking your head, you spied one of the pots he had abandoned and picked it up. A dusky pink colour that had never been opened. “Want to do it?” Hongjoong suddenly asked, making you look at him. Pressing your lips together, you shrugged.

“Do you think it’ll look good?”

“You’ll look good with any colour, pretty. Plus, if you really don’t like it, we can go over it?” Convinced, you bobbed your head slowly. Elated, Hongjoong hastily put everything else away and stood up. Having done it so many times before, he got all the supplies ready, the gloves and the mixing bowls. “So, I’ll bleach your hair first. Then you can do my roots? Then we’ll w-“ he was cut off by your phone ringing. Confused, you picked it up and frowned at the unknown number.

“Maybe it’s someone wanting to book an appointment?” Hongjoong suggested, pouring the peroxide into a bowl.

“Hello?” You answered the call, pressing speaker as you’d grown a custom to recently.

“(Y/n).” You froze, your heart leaping to your throat. Puzzled, Hongjoong turned around, worried at your pale complexion. “I’ve been trying to reach you for weeks.” You swallowed thickly, unsure of what to say. How could he have found your new number? It made no sense.

“Why?” You managed.

“Can’t I contact my own daughter?” In a flash, Hongjoong was by your side on the tub. “Come and see us. We just want to talk.” Your father tried, a twinge of honesty in his inflection. You just sighed with conflict. “Your mother misses you.” He did his best to be persuasive.

“I don’t know dad.”

“Just, please? Come to the gala on Saturday?” It was strange, your father almost begging you for something. Like you actually held the upper hand for once.

“If I go, I’m not coming alone.” You said sternly, leaving no room for discussion.

“Yes, that’s absolutely fine.” You said nothing else and hung up. Hongjoong pulled you into his chest instantly.

“Are you sure?” He asked, your arms hugging his waist tightly.

“I’m sure, you’ll be with me. And the second they try to convert me, we’re leaving.” You responded, mumbling against the skin of his neck. He rubbed your back soothingly, nodding along with every word.

“Let’s make you look even prettier then, show them how amazing of a daughter they’ve lost.” Hongjoong simpered, pinching your cheek which made you smile bashfully. He got to work, doing your hair quickly and instructing you on how to do his. It was a fun experience, one you really enjoyed. Adding the bright blue to his hair was even better, even if it did stain your fingers. When it was time, he rinsed the pink off of your hair before doing his own. Being the gentleman he is, Hongjoong dried your hair first and styled it for you. You weren’t allowed to look in any mirrors, sitting on his bed and watching as he dried off his own hair.

“It looks really good.” You smiled as he turned around. “Might be better than your split dye.” There was a faint blush on his cheeks from your compliment. He pulled you up, gazing into your eyes lovingly.

“And you look even better, pretty. Beautiful.” Now it was your turn to be shy, pressing your face against his chest in return. Hongjoong chuckled, brining you to a mirror. His hands covered your eyes as you stood in front of it. “Ready?”

“Yes.” You giggled, trying to wiggle out of his grip. He laughed at your effort, slowly removing his hands. Seeing yourself in the mirror, you gasped. It was so different, a lovely light, dusky pink. But it felt so right and so you. Hongjoong wrapped his arms around your waist from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Like it?”

“I love it. Thank you.” You ran your hand through the freshly dyed hair with a thrilled smile. Pressing his lips to your cheek, Hongjoong guided you back to the bed and sat himself against the pillows. You crawled on top, sitting yourself between his legs and lying against his chest.

“So, tell me. What do I have to do to be ready for this ‘gala’ on Saturday?” He asked, drawing shapes on the skin of your arm tenderly. You sighed softly, thinking back on the many you had attended.

“There’s so many rules, and things you have to do.”

“And that’s fine, we’re in this together yeah? Then it’s up to you how you deal with your parents.” Hongjoongs words comforted you greatly, making the whole ordeal not seem to bad.

“You have to wear all white, your tattoos must be covered. You have to dress smart, a shirt a tie, pants and dress shoes.” You started listing of the requirements, the man nodding along. “The first thing we’ll have to do is attend the sermon. It’s a disaster. It makes no sense I’ll warn you now. But we’ll have to sit through that.” You explained, sitting yourself up. Hongjoong followed suit, tugging you closer to face him properly. “Then, there’s a feast. The food is bland and strange. Just pretend to eat it. The less you eat the more pure they’ll think you are.”

“That’s toxic.” Hongjoong commented, holding both of your hands. You nod in agreement, leaning forward and resting your forehead against head shoulder.

“He’ll sit at the head of the table, with his stupid family. He looks down at everyone as if he’s a god.” You murmured. “I suppose, to them, he is. They worship him.” You spat, angry for the families he’d corrupted, including your own. “Then it’s the “gala”. Which, is actually just an over the top house party.” You concluded, not moving from the warmth your boyfriend was providing. Hongjoong had his arms around you now, his grip tight.

“Alright. So what can’t I do?”

“Swear, get drunk, talk badly to the pastor or his family, eat too fast, eat first, eat to slow, finish eating first, get up and leave the table, leave the sermon, go in any of the roped off rooms, cry, shout, raise your voice, cause a scene, disobey any instructions, and never talk over him.” Your voice grew quieter with every rule you repeated. They had been ingrained into your head for years, forced down your throat, practice choking you. Hongjoong cupped your cheeks, making you look at him. He wiped under your eyes, drying the tears you didn’t know were there.

“You’ve been through so much.” He mumbled, stroking your cheeks lovingly. “You’re away from that now yeah? I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you again.” You nod your head at his promise, sniffling lightly. He smiled, pressing his lips against yours. You kissed back with fervour, your thoughts melting away in an instant. Swiftly, hongjoong pulled you onto his lap, as his lips moved against yours in perfect conjunction. Your hands gripped at his oversized T-shirt, tilting your head and effectively deepening the kiss. Neither of you could pull away, even if your lungs were protesting. The moment was intense, fulled by burning emotions and the realisation that you were finally in control. In control of your own life and your own feelings. You had a choice now. Hongjoong moved back an inch, resting his forehead against yours.

“I love you,” he breathed, brown eyes flittering between your eyes and your lips. “You know that right?” Your heart was hammering in your chest, cheeks a deep shade of red. He smiled at your timid nature, kissing your lips a few more times. “You don’t have to say it back, pretty.” He reassured, not an ounce of judgement in his bones. Shaking your head, you gave a teary smile.

“I love you too.” You said, feeling a weight fall off of your shoulders. You’d never seen a man smile so bright, his eyes crinkled in pure joy. He wrapped his arms around you, rolling onto his back and pulling you down on top of him. A cheerful laugh spilled from his lips.

“Say it again?” Hongjoong promoted hopefully, earning a sheepish whine from yourself. “Please?” He begged, allowing you to shuffle into a more comfortable position. You looked down at him, at his doe eyes and expectant expression. Unable to resist, you leant in close and spoke softly.

“I love you.” His hand found the back of your neck, pulling you into a heated kiss once again. You giggled against his lips, sinking into him with ease. Saturday definitely seemed more doable all of a sudden.

———

A drilling alarm brought you out of your peaceful slumber on Saturday morning. Hongjoong groaned, quick to turn it off and settle down again. His bare chest pressed to your back as he wound his arms around you.

“It’s so cold.” You complained, basking in the warmth now being supplied to you.

“I know sweetheart.” He nuzzled into the back of your neck. “How about I make us both a hot chocolate whilst we get ready hm?” His offer was tempting, a smile gracing your lips. You nod, disappointed when he got up and left you alone. Hongjoong scoffed at your small whine, pulling on some pants. “I’ll be two minutes.”

When he returned, you were in the bathroom getting washed, he could smell your pumpkin spiced soap. Smiling to himself, Hongjoong got out the new clothes he’d bought you both, remembering fondly how you’d scolded him. But he’d spend every penny on you ,no matter what you said. You emerged from the bathroom, fresh for the day. Glancing up, Hongjoong whistled at your appearance and you felt yourself blush. Before you could hide yourself, your boyfriend crossed the room and placed his hands on your waist. He sighed contently, considering your flushed face for a moment.

“You’re beautiful.” Even after all the months, you were still shy to his compliments. You smiled, catching your lip between your teeth and avoiding eye contact. Hongjoong chuckled, pecking your lips before pulling away and entering the en-suite. You couldn’t help the stupid grin on your face, turning to the outfit he had laid out for you. It was pretty, a white turtleneck, paired with one of the short, pleated skirts you loved so much. That was of course, also white. You’d found some white tights along with basic converse. It was smart yet casual, not looking like you’d done too much. Before getting dressed, you took a few small sips of your hot drink and sighed. Outside, orange leaves were scattered along the damp grass. Bare branches rustling filled you with joy, a reminder of the cosy season. The anxiety you once had for Gala days was no longer present. Instead, you felt comfort in knowing that, at the end of the terrible day ahead, you’d be returning home with Hongjoong. There was no pressure to be perfect and poised. You were going in there with a new confidence. Hongjoong. Setting the mug down, you got yourself dressed and looked in the mirror.

“You look like an angel.” Hongjoong said, slipping from the bathroom and coming to your side. Blushing, you looked back at him and watched as he pulled on his white slacks. Stepping forward, you helped him with the buttons on his dress shirt. He stared down at you lovingly, cupping your cheeks the second you were done. “How are you feeling?”

“On edge, but I’m okay.” You loosely did his tie, straightening up his collar. He thumbed your cheeks softly, searching your (e/c) eyes.

“I’m right here, I’ll punch the pastor if he insults you.” You couldn’t help but laugh, peering up at him with affection. Leaning up, you left a tender kiss on his pierced lips before stepping away.

You arrived to the gathering house just before midday, hongjoong helped you out in surprise.

“You were surprised at the size of my house? This is insane?” He gawked quietly, sizing up the mansion before him. It was a stunning building, with marble stairs leading to a grand entranceway. Of course, everything was white, even the fake flowers and the pots they were in. Humming, you took hold of his hand and began walking forwards.

“Your place feels like a home…unlike this place.” You shivered, noticing other people entering the house. A tall man stood at the door, one you recognised from previous visits. Getting behind a small family, you looked down at the little boy sadly. Even at that young age, he looked drained, probably from his brainwashed parents and the teachings of FaithsKey. Noticing your expression, Hongjoong pulled you into his side his arm holding your waist in comfort. The doorman saw you and raised his brows.

“Ms (y/l/n)? Your parents are already inside. I haven’t seen you in months?” His tone was questioning, buff arms folded tightly over his chest. You just shrugged, signing the form by the door. He wasn’t a terrible person, even so you didn’t want to give him any of your time and pulled your boyfriend inside hastily. Making your way up the centre staircase, the air was filled with the unmistakable scent of sage. The place was barren, colourless and almost prison like.

“It’s silent.” Hongjoong mumbled as you came to the second floor, no one in sight down the long, dull corridor.

“That’s how he likes it.” You muttered back, holding his hand a little tighter as you remembered your way back to the sermon room. “Remember, no talking, no sudden movements. We just sit at the back like we’re ghosts.” Squeezing his hand tighter, you could feel the anxiety creeping back into your mind.

“I know, pretty. I’m right here with you, remember? Just try to block it all out.” Hongjoong reassured, kissing your temple softly as you stopped outside a shut, double door. You nod, taking a deep breath before quietly slipping inside the sermon room. It was almost full, but you found an empty pew right at the back. Hongjoong tucked you into his side protectively, linked fingers resting on his thigh. It was dystopian, watching the people, clad in white gowns finding a seat. They sat like clones, eyes zoned in on the crystal stand at the head of the room. You knew your parents were somewhere in the same room, so close yet so far from you now. All that could be heard was the flickering of wood wicked candles, hushed breaths and fancy shoes finding their places. Even with everyone in white, the room was dark and dreary. After a long five minutes, the doors at the other end of the room opened, and out came the man you hated most. His presence intoxicated the room. By his side, were his son and wife, along with a few disciples. Elder Candace guided his family to the first pews as everyone rose from their seats. Hongjoong held your waist firmly, eyes darting around the room.

“Greetings my beloveds. The new, the faithful, those of you rejoining us-“ the pastor met your eyes for a split second, “-I’m delighted to have you with us on this fine day.” He held his arms out gratefully, veneers on full display. He began to preach, clasping his hands together and bellowing out in the silent room. All around you, his followers listened eagerly, taking in his every word like it was gold. “My children, you take my words now. I am the path to greatness. With me, you shall always be enlightened. You shall always be pure, unadulterated and happy.” It was the same spiel as always, his charisma manipulating the crowd. Your throat bobbed thickly, suddenly you felt very hot. Noticing your discomfort, hongjoong brought you closer, careful not to alert anyone. “I have led many people to glory, shown them the light. With me, I’ll ease all your troubles, reward your faith. Trust me. I have what you need.” A shiver ran down your spine, not liking the sound of that at all. Yet, the people were soaking up every word he said.

Luckily, the sermon passed quickly and people filed out of the room. Hongjoong draped his arm around your shoulders, walking down the hallway with you.

“(Y/n)?” you froze, slowly turning back. There they stood, your parents. Dressed in their best formal wear. Tentatively, your mother took a step closer, yet she didn’t reach out to you. “It’s good to see you.” She continued, voice almost breathless.

“I’m glad you agreed to come.” Your father added, not so subtly looking at the man holding you. You just nod at them, the words stuck in your throat. They walked beside you both, an awkward tension spreading.

“So, who is this?” Your father asked, breaking the silence. Hongjoong looked over, holding his hand out confidently.

“I’m Hongjoong, (y/n)’s boyfriend.” He shook your dad’s hand firmly, sending him a direct message not to upset you further. Your dad faltered slightly, something you hadn’t seen before.

“Well, Hongjoong, you’ll love the food, it’s delicious.” Your mother boasted on the Pastors behalf. He didn’t believe her at all, but nod politely either way.

Entering the dining hall, the brightness caught Hongjoong off guard. The long table was made of glass, surrounded with crushed-velvet, grey chairs. The floors were white tiles, the walls a light grey pattern. From the ceiling hung huge crystal chandeliers. Along the table, were pot plates and shiny silverware, wine glasses with tacky prints. Walking along, you found yours and your “plus one”s name places. Next to your parents and luckily not too close to the host. Hongjoong pulled out your chair, tucking it in once you were sat. He instantly held his hand out for you, to which you held it immediately. Your mother sat on your right, your father by her side. It was silent yet again, the followers putting the white napkins on their white clothes. The pastor took his seat at the head of the table, nodding to a man stood by the door. After a second, waiters entered the room and began to dish out food onto peoples plates carefully. Following this, they came around with decanters. Everyone was poured a glass of a clear, green tinted liquid, except for you. Both your parents and Hongjoong looked confused as your glass was left empty.

“My beloveds, I have provided this nutritious meal out of the goodness of my heart. As I the saviour give you the key to a long, prosperous life.” Everyone clapped at his nonsense, as he raised a glass in toast.

“Thank you. You may converse.” You let out a breath, the room breaking out into idle chatter.

“What’s with the drinks?” Hongjoong questioned.

“It’s grape juice. Not wine.” You confirmed, but he just shook his head.

“No, I mean, you didn’t get anything?”

“I know, I’m not sure why…” you trailed off, trying not to think too much about it. The guests all around you seemed so happy, spooning the food into their mouths with joy. They spoke with glee, eyes alight unnaturally.

Beside you, Hongjoong stared at his plate in dismay. It was a mixture of congealed, beige stuff, not appealing at all.

“What is this?” He asked in a hushed voice, pushing the creamy sludge around his plate.

“Mashed potato’s, with diced anchovies and egg relish.” You watched as his face dropped, lips pursing as he tried to remain unfazed. Your lips twitched as you held in your laughter, leaning onto his shoulder and hugging his arm. “No?”

“No.” He agreed to your unasked question of ‘do you like it?’, moving the food around to make it seem like he’d tried. You chuckled quietly, relaxing when Hongjoong slipped his arm around your waist. He smiled down at you, brushing a few stray strands of your hair back from your face. A hand suddenly landed on your shoulder, cold breath hitting your neck uncomfortably.

“I’m glad to see you again, (y/n).” The pastor grinned menacingly, pouring a deep red liquid into your glass. You were frozen, unable to do or say anything. Hongjoong tightening his grip on your waist, pulling you away from the pastors grip. Their eyes met, and Hongjoong could have killed him with the look he was giving. “No one truly leaves us, (y/n). Welcome home.” With that eerie statement, the pastor walked away. Hongjoong was quick to move the glass away from you.

“Don’t drink that.” He voiced whilst shaking his head. You sighed, placing your head back onto your boyfriend’s chest. Nothing had changed then. At least now you had someone to lean on during the horrific event. “How about tonight we go on a little night drive hm?” A small grin broke onto your face at his mumbled suggestion. “We’ll get any food you want, put on your favourite band and drive for as long as you want.”

“I’d love that.” You felt eyes on you, but didn’t bother look back at your parents, you didn’t need their disapproval on top of everything.

———

Shortly after the meal had been consumed, the beloved pastor directed everyone down a floor. There you were free to roam, anywhere that wasn’t roped off or locked, that is. The lower floor consisted of a showy kitchen, clearly never used, a few living rooms and garden access. You tugged Hongjoong into one of the pallor rooms, knowing it would be fairly empty from your previous visits. Sitting down on one of the hard, leather sofas, he turned to you.

“You did this on your own? For so long, no wonder you were so drained.” He sighed, pulling you into his chest comfortably. You hummed, relaxing against him in a second.

“It’s fine, you took me away from all of this.” You replied with a small smile, toying with the buttons on his shirt. He couldn’t help but grin, petting your hair affectionately.

“Well, I knew I’d fall in love the second I saw you.” His lips pressed against your head tenderly, a blush creeping up your neck. Hongjoong chuckled, stroking your cheek. “You look like a tomato.” You hit his chest.

“Ouch. A cute tomato!” He defended, making you both laugh. Just then, your mother entered the room, a look of relief on her face as she turned back to let your father know she’d found you. They came over, sitting on the sofa directly opposite. Hongjoong pulled you even closer, a subtle gesture that meant so much to you. For a minute, it was silent, an awkward atmosphere in the air. Eventually, your mother sat forward.

“You didn’t touch your food, are you still not eating much?” Her brows furrowed in concern.

“She eats, don’t worry.” Hongjoong responded for you, both your parents looking at him in surprise.

“You live together?” She asked, and you nod a yes. Surprisingly, they seemed okay about it, not what you’d expected at all.

“What do you do for work?” Your father looked at Hongjoong expectantly, yet with no malice.

“I own a studio. I do tattoos and piercings.” He explained proudly, prepared for a horrified reaction, as were you. Except, your father just hummed in response.

“It’s impressive to own your own place so young.” He complimented. Hongjoong looked at him in shock.

“Oh, thank you sir.” Neither of you knew how to take their behaviour. You were used to the yelling and berating, the constant judgement. And, of course, Hongjoong was expecting that too. But they just seemed so different. Turning to your boyfriend, you smiled.

“I’m just going to the bathroom.”

“I’ll go with you?” He offered with worry. Simpering, you kissed him quickly.

“I’ll be fine I promise.” You got up, heading out of the room and down the dim hall. Everyone you passed were in such high spirits, sipping their grape juice and cackling all the while. It baffled you how much the man could brainwash people.

You used the bathroom quickly, standing at the sink and washing your hands in the hot water. Glancing up, you let out a near scream upon seeing someone behind you in the mirror. It was the Pastors son. When had he come in, you hadn’t heard a thing. When he saw you’d noticed, a grim smirk appeared on his lips.

“Good evening (y/n).” You didn’t reply, turning slowly to face him. He stepped forward, making you move off of the sink and away from him. “What’s the matter? You don’t look so good.”

“What are you doing?” You tried to sound confident, voicing your confusion best you could. All the man did was smile.

“My question still stands.” He said, coming even closer. “We could wed. Oh we’d make a perfect couple.” He boasted, coming so close your back hit the white wall behind you. “We can fix your disgusting aesthetic. Get you to look pure and godly. Just as my father likes.” You shook your head fiercely, but this only annoyed him. “What? You think you’re better than us?”

“No!” You tried, hoping he’d stop but he only drew nearer. “Of course not! But look at me, we’re too different it won’t work.”

“My father can fix you!” He yelled, getting up in your face. His breath reeked of the disgusting meal served earlier.

“I-I don’t need fixing. I’m happy. I have a boyfriend.” Even that knowledge didn’t deter him.

“We can get rid of him. You’ll be happy with me. I’ll show you a real man.” His hands ghosted over your waist, trailing the shape of your body in a way that caused a shiver of fear.

“Now, now Ananias. That’s no way to talk to little (y/n) here is it.” The Pastor slithered into the room like a snake, tutting falsely. You swallowed thickly, back still pressed against the tiles. At least you now knew one of their names. Ananias looked at his father, hands hovering just before your neck.

“But I want her as my wife.”

“And you may, but use more force child. No woman wants a man who can’t handle her.” Your heart began to beat faster than you knew it could. There was no way this could be happening. Surely, with so many people around they wouldn’t, but it looked like they would.

Hongjoong kept his eyes on the door you had left through, feeling every second passing like a sin. Your mother cleared her throat, catching him off guard. When he looked, he found the pair of them looking at him already.

“How did you meet?” She asked, perching on the uncomfortable seat.

“She came in for a lip piercing, and then we went on a date that weekend.” He told her, not scared of any reprimanding he may receive. They looked at each other for a moment before your mum spoke again.

“She left us, one day. Did you take her in?” There was a hint of sadness in her inflection. Still, Hongjoong nod firmly.

“Yes. She lives with me now.” Looking between your parents, his lip twitched slightly. “We even work together. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” He grinned, checking the time on his phone. You’d been gone ten minutes and he was getting worried.

“You’re a good man, Hongjoong.” Your dad said suddenly, making the younger man’s eyes widen.

“I can see the love and adoration in your eyes. It’s written all over your face. I’m glad my daughter found you.” He gave Hongjoong an approving nod, a tight-lipped smile nearly coming out. It was like they weren’t at manipulated as you’d described. Perhaps not seeing you had stirred something within them. Snapping out of it, Hongjoong checked the time again and stood abruptly.

“I’m going to find her, excuse me.”

Hongjoong rushed down the hall, vaguely recalling where the bathroom was on his way down. Noticing the door was ajar, he felt his stomach drop and instantly knew something was off. Without a second thought, he barged into the room and immediately saw both the pastor and his son cornering you.

“Get away from her!” He lunged forward, yanking the creepy men off of you and pulling you into his arms quickly. You hugged onto his waist for dear life, trembling slightly from what had almost happened. Feeling you shaking, Hongjoong looked at the Ken with anger.

“Don’t you dare touch her.” He spat, moving to get you out of there as fast as possible.

“Shes become a worthless tool now it seems.” The pastor sighed patronisingly. Hongjoongs eye twitched, and he spun on his heel, his fist connecting with the elders jaw furiously. Ananias gaped, cowering in the corner. Keeping his breathing under control, Hongjoong lead you out of the bathroom, holding you at arms length and checking you over. Seeing your tears almost made him angry again, but his worry ran deeper.

“You’re okay pretty, I’ve got you. Did they touch you?” You shook your head quickly, leaning into his warm hands as he wiped your tears. Hongjoong relaxed at this, hugging you tightly once again. He kissed your temple repeatedly. “We’re leaving. Right now okay?”

“Please..” you pleaded, needing to get out of that stupid house.

“Thank you.” Your mother appeared behind you both, and you looked at her in surprise. Both your parents glanced at you with regret, tears in the woman’s eyes. They had just witnessed all of that. “We’ve been so blind.” She added, choking up with emotion.

“You were right, we’re sorry. Could you forgive us?” Your father almost begged, edging forward. You stopped Hongjoong from scolding them, as you knew he would. Taking a deep breath, you stood in front of your parents trying to appear strong.

“Get help.” You started, letting your (e/c) eyes look between them. “Real, professional help. Then I’ll consider it. You really hurt me. But we can try.” They looked at you with a melancholy understanding. Nevertheless, it was a good sign. Hongjoong laced your fingers together, briskly walking past your parents and out of the house. Once in the safety of your car, you let out a long breath. It was all over, finally. You really never had to go back, ever again. you hadn’t even noticed your boyfriend driving off, until you looked out the window to see you were on the motorway.

“Can we get food still?” You mumbled. Hongjoong placed his hand on your thigh as he drove.

“Of course, pretty. We can do anything you like.” You finally smiled, playing with the rings on his fingers calmly. He really was your everything, the light that had brightened up your dark life. When he stopped at a red light, the man leant over, pressing his lips to yours lovingly. “The rest of your life just begun, (y/n).” He smiled, “and it’ll be us until we’re old and grey.” Warmth spread in your chest at the idea of growing old with Hongjoong. Truly, it sounded perfect, like for once, you knew everything would finally work out. As long as he was there with you.

———

[twice-inamillion]

Forever Jihyo

Fluff, Smut (Wedding, lap dance, deep penetration, doggy style, creampie)

Chapter 210

5,180 Words 

(Jihyo and OC’s wedding celebration in Hawaii. Consists of a small group of people close to the members and OC. Also a special performance from OC.)

Mina enters Jihyo’s room and sees a sleeping Jihyo, “Unnie, wake up.” After some poking, Jihyo slowly opens her eyes and asks, “What time is it?”

“It’s ten in the morning. We need to get ready. Today’s the big day,” as Mina opens the large blinds and the sliding door to let some fresh air in. 

Jihyo stares at the window and mumbles, “Yes, today’s the day.

“Breakfast is ready,” shouts Momo. Today was her turn to make breakfast since you left early in the morning to meet up with your friends. 

“How do you feel, Jihyo? Excited on being the first one to get married?” asks Nayeon. 

“I’m happy but nervous. I want everything to go well.” 

Chaeyoung shouts, “What’s there to be nervous about? Oppa can’t runway even if he wants to, haha.” 

The members glare at Chaeyoung for her comment, and Tzuyu says, “Daddy wouldn’t run away; he loves us too much. Right?”

Mina responds, “Of course, he loves us and the babies.”

After breakfast, the members head out to the venue in golf carts, racing to be the first ones there. “Wow, the venue looks so pretty mommy.” 

Jihyo replies, “Your daddy and I chose it for that reason, and it’s really private.”

After all the members arrive, they head inside and do the last-minute check on Jihyo’s dress and get their makeup done. During their makeup session, the members take selfies and photos of each other as memories. Jihyo smiles, watching her members having fun, and Jisoo comes to mind.

Suddenly, she hears small footsteps that make her think of her baby girl, and she looks at her phone for pictures of Jisoo. The footsteps get louder, making her a bit emotional, when she hears, “Umma!”

She turns around and sees Jisoo standing by the door. Jisoo holds her hands up and cries after not seeing Jihyo for a few days. “My baby,” running to Jisoo and picking her up. “I missed you.” Jisoo kisses Jihyo on the cheek, “Umma! Umma!” 

“Jisoo was excited to see you, Jihyo,” says Jihyo’s mom. “I really missed her.” 

Not long after, Ari and Hina also come along, holding hands with each other, Mina’s mom behind them. Ari tried to go with Jisoo, but Hina wouldn’t let her go, especially since the place they were was foreign. It wasn’t until they saw a glimpse of their mother that Hina let go of Ari’s hand. “U… Umma,” Hina rubbed her eyes and was about to cry. Not too far behind, Ari shows excitement to see her mother again, as well as her other aunties. 

Mina hears Hina’s cry, hops off the high chair, and waddles (runs) her way to her children. She picks both up and is attacked by kisses from both of them. 

“Seems like Hina is willing to put some extra effort is it’s for her mom. I haven’t seen her this active,” says Mina’s mom. 

Mina walks to her mother, kisses her, and thanks her for watching her children while she was gone. 

“Where’s Daeun?” asks Dahyun, wondering where her baby was. 

Jihyo’s mom replies, “Chaeyoung’s mom is with her. She was sleeping and didn’t want to wake her up, so she has her in the stroller.” Dahyun gets off the chair and heads out to meet Daeun, “I’ll be right back.”

“What time did you all arrive?” asks Jihyo. 

“Just before midnight. We didn’t want to call since we were tired and just wanted to rest, but these little ones woke up early, excited to see their mothers,” as Jihyo’s mom looked at the babies. 

“Is that true?” asked Jihyo. Jisoo nods and gives her mother a big kiss. “Aww, my baby missed me.” 

“Alright, girls, let’s give your mommies some space to prepare for their pictures. How about having some shaved ice. Your grandpa went to go get some.” 

“Down… down….” the children wanted to be placed back on the floor. They hold their grandma’s hand and walk back towards the patio to meet their grandpa with the shaved ice.

The day continues, and the members are done with their makeup. They take selfies and pictures of each other throughout the day. They try to take photos of the beautiful landscape, the big ocean in the background, and the amazing view of the venue.

You have also been busy and have done some last-minute preparations for the ceremony when you hear a knock on the door, “Can I come in?” 

“The door is unlocked,” you respond and see Samatha, “Hey, what’s up?” 

“Just wanted to see how you were doing. Can’t visit my best friend?”

“Yeah, just surprised it took you this long.”

“You know how it is, the girlfriend wanted to stay in longer,” and gives you a smirk.

“Yeah, I know,” smiling back. 

“Excited for your wedding?”

“Of course, but nervous too.” 

“Why, scared that your harem is going to get jealous?”

“Haha, don’t jinx it.” 

“I’m just kidding. Anyway, why didn’t you invite your siblings? You know your older brother and younger sister have been asking about you. Your relationship with them wasn’t that bad, right?”

“We’re okay. We speak here and there but I wouldn’t want to see them, don’t want to get involved with my family if I can help it. You know how they are, remember.” 

“Yeah, you’re right, but they are still your family.” 

“Not by choice, just born into it. Why have they been talking about me?”

“Well… they know. Just the two.”

“You mean… about the wedding?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Fuck, how did they find out? I just hope they don’t show up. I don’t want them to make to complicate things.”

“You know how they are, your brother and sister like messing with you; maybe they keep tabs.”

“I don’t want them interfering with my personal life, especially with the members.”

“Oh yeah, that would be troublesome, especially with Sana since that’s her type, haha. They asked me how you were doing, but I just told them I didn’t know.” 

“Thanks, even if they know I just want them to stay away.”

“Alright, man do sound too gloomy, it’s your wedding day. Just enjoy and make the most of it. You already have your honeymoon planned out, right?”

“Of course. We are heading out once the wedding is over,” showing a slight smile. 

“Make sure to enjoy your honeymoon, but don’t go too crazy,” as she waves goodbye. 

After the photoshoot, the guests begin to arrive at the venue. It isn’t a large wedding like those on television but enough to see friends and family. 

The first to arrive are Jihyo’s family, consisting of her mom, dad, two sisters, and Jisoo. Then Mina’s mother, father, and the twins. The third person is Chaeyoung’s mother and Daeun who is in a stroller. The fourth group is Sana’s mother and father, who goes to check up on Sana’s condition. 

It doesn’t take long for the rest of the guests to arrive and make their way to their seats. Watching the seats get filled makes you a bit nervous and gives you an idea of how the members feel when they perform. 

“Alright, everyone, gather around and start taking your seats. The ceremony is about to begin in a few minutes,” says the wedding planner.

As the groom, you’re the first one to make it to the altar and see familiar faces: Momo’s family, Tzuyu’s mom, Jihyo’s friend Sejeong, Somi, and other close friends. 

Next to you is manager unnie, who has covered for you since you arrived at the company, your friend and now the person to ordain the wedding. 

You wait before the altar as the music plays, signaling the bride and bridesmaids to come in. In comes the members in pairs in order from oldest to youngest, smiling at their parents and making their way alongside the altar. 

Out comes Jihyo and her dad, walking at a slow pace. You can’t help but be in awe of how beautiful Jihyo looks. The closer she gets, you reminisce the memories you have made with her, happy ones and sad ones, each holding significant value to you both. Your heart beats faster, your hands start to sweat, and your eyes become watery. 

They stop inches from you, and Jihyo’s dad walks to you and grabs your arm, “I know you’ll make her happy and protect her with all your might. You’re a great guy, but please don’t hurt her.” You place your hand on his shoulder and reassure him, “Don’t worry, I’ll protect her with my life.” 

He walks towards Jihyo and says, “I don’t know what your future holds for you, and I know that twenty years from now, many things will have happened that we can’t predict. But whatever happens, and wherever you go, your Mum and I know you’ll always have each other’s love, and you’ll always have ours.” Jihyo tears up and hugs her dad, giving him one last kiss as his little girl.

He holds both your hands, “I know Jihyo will be an amazing wife, and I know that because if she’s anything like her mother, she’ll still be making you smile even 50 years on,” with a teary face and walks to his seat.

“Today is a happy day as we come to celebrate the union between two people who will become one. I’ve known these two for a long time, and I can tell you that their love is pure and real. I remember scolding them when they got together, but I eventually accepted the fact and assumed it was just a fling; over time, I would see how much in love they were. I’ve seen their relationship deepen over the years and bloom (looking at Jisoo). I am happy that they asked me to officiate their wedding here today,” and the audience clapped. “Thank you.” She continues her speech and eventually signals you for your speech. “Now, we will hear from the groom.”

You pull out a card from your pocket and look at Jihyo, “I remember the first time we met, you and Jeongyeon were playing a panic on Nayeon. She was chasing you around the hall, and I thought you were somewhat of a wild person. I was somewhat timid, but you easily approached me and invited me into your group. It was weird at first, but over time, I got used to having you around and thought of you as a little sister. Eventually, I left and didn’t think our friendship was going to last, but I was wrong. You messaged me often while abroad and kept me company during my loneliest times. Our relationship deepened, and we secretly became boyfriend and girlfriend, not telling anyone about it, even your closest friends. When I came back, I was scared of our relationship because of your job, but you said our love is what mattered. We had our ups and downs, but we always got through it, and look at us now, us standing here in front of our loved ones. I promise to make you happy and protect you and our family forever.” You see Jihyo tearing up and holding her hand. 

Jihyo is given the mic and pulls out her card, “I remember the first time I met you; you were timid when you arrived at our company. I wanted to welcome you and invite you to our group, which I am thankful for because it was one of my best decisions. You were so nice to me, shared your snacks, and even helped us sneak in food while we were on a diet. I felt safe having you around. I know you saw me as a little sister, but I wanted to be more than that. While you were abroad, I knew it would be hard to keep in touch, but we made it work. You might not have known them, but having you around, even if not in person, kept me going during my most challenging moments. I remember the encouragement when I would share my bad days with you and how I should always look ahead. I remember how happy I was when you accepted being my boyfriend; it was the first time I asked a boy out, haha. I gave you hints, but I know you can be dense sometimes, so I took a leap of faith and looked at us now. We have made wonderful memories together; we even have our own bundle of joy (looking at Jisoo). 

I know our relationship might not be typical, but I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. Thank you for being my best friend, being there during my happiest and toughest moments, for cheering me on, and assuring me that everything is going to be okay. I’m the luckiest girl in the world for having someone like you in my life, and I want to spend it together with you, forever.”

“I know the both of you will make each other happy. If there is no objection, I will make this official and announce you both married by the powers given to me. You may both kiss the bride.” 

The crowd applauds as you and Jihyo share a passionate and heartwarming kiss. You both wave and start to walk down the aisle and see Jisoo running, carrying a pouch of flower petals and throwing them in the air, “Umma, appa!”

Jisoo sits between the both of you while dinner is served and is having the best moment of her life after the photo session. She looks at the large amount of gifts placed on the table nearby, which is getting her excited. “Do you like it when they bring the presents?” asked Jihyo. Jisoo nods, “maybe we can open them later.”

Jihyo’s mother then stands up, grabs the mic, and says, “Let’s give a round of applause to the newlyweds.” Jihyo and you stand up and wave to the audience. “Thank you for being here today and being part of this beautiful moment. We also have more surprises to come, so please enjoy.”

You and Jihyo head to the back and get ready for your first dance as a married couple. Slow music begins to play, and you both walk to the middle of the stage. You hold her hand, place the other on her waist, and move back and forth to the rhythm of the music. “I love you, Jihyo.” “I love you, too.” “We are finally together.” “Yes, you're finally all mine.” She places her head on your chest as you continue to dance. 

On the other side, the members can’t help but tear up watching the both of you together as husband and wife. “They look so happy together; it’s cute,” says Sana. “I wonder who’s next,” asks Chaeyoung. The members look at each other and giggle.” The dance ends, and everyone goes back to their seats.

“I want to give a toast to the newlyweds. I’m so happy for both of you on this special day. I know that my daughter, Jihyo, really loves him. I would hear his name often when they were younger and even more after she debuted. I remember when I met him for the first time, the way he would look at her, I knew they would last. Please treat each other with love and respect. You may have ups and downs, but as long as you both are there for each other, you will overcome any situation. Welcome to the family!” and holds her glass up. Everyone cheers. “Oh, by the way, I want more grandkids, so let me know if she isn’t treating you right. I’ll talk to her,” which makes everyone laugh, and Jihyo dies of embarrassment.

The night continues as people give their own toast, sharing memories of both the groom and the bride. Some of them are nice and sweet, and others are just funny. 

After finishing their speech, they announce the father and daughter dance. You watch as Jihyo dances with her dad. During the dance, Jihyo gets emotional as her father tells her how much he loves her. “I love you so much, my little one; you grew up so fast. I still remember when I held you in my arms. I hope he makes you happy; just know I’m here for you, always.”

After their song ends, it’s your turn to dance with Jihyo’s mom and Jihyo with her younger sister. You grab onto her hand and her waist and begin to dance slowly. “Thank you for marrying Jihyo. She was such an active child that I feared she wouldn’t find anyone. Thank you for coming into my daughter’s life and giving us Jisoo. Please treat them well; I’m entrusting my little babies to you.” You hear Jihyo’s mom voice crack as she tries to hold back her tears. “Of course, I love her and will protect them with my life.”

The music ends, and the both of you walk back to your table. Dinner continues, and everyone is enjoying the food and waiting for the wedding cake to arrive. The members come up to your table, take selfies with both of you, and wish you the best. You then hear a subtle comment from Dahyun, “When will it be our wedding, but before you can say anything, Mina pouts, “You still need to give me my ring and point at her ring finger.” Jihyo laughs and says, “You still haven’t proposed? You’re bad. You can’t make a girl wait like that,” in a devilish manner. You look at Jisoo eating next to Jihyo in her high chair, “Jisoo, help Daddy!” Jisoo looks in your direction and laughs, which results in her noodles falling out of her mouth. She looks at noodles that fell on the floor and starts to babble while making a serious face. The members laugh and say, “Looks like Jisoo is mad at you too.” 

After enjoying the food and the atmosphere, the announcer shouts, “It’s time for the groom to take off the garter from the bride!” Everyone looks with anticipation as Jihyo sits on the chair. You slowly get on your knees and aim for her left leg, going up her dress. You can see the nervousness on her face, but it changes completely when she feels your fingers aiming higher than just her garter. With a surprised face, she held your arms, “Oppa, not here. There’s people watching.” You look at her with a smile, “you’re not nervous anymore, right?” Her attitude changes, and she seems more comfortable. You continue to slide her garter down her leg until it reaches below the knee. For the last part, you use your teeth and cause everyone to laugh as Jihyo smacks your back, “Oppa, my parents are watching!” Jihyo turns around to see her dad laugh and her mom covering her sisters' eyes. 

With the garter in your hands, you spin it around in the air with excitement. The crowd cheers, especially the members. Jihyo’s mom brings a chair for Jihyo; she gets on and holds her bouquet, “Who’s ready? Most women come up to the stage, including the members and the member’s mother, just for fun. Everyone waits for Jihyo to throw the bouquet of flowers, the people surrounding Jihyo from behind. She teases them by pretending to toss the bouquet but laughs when they reach up high to catch it. After a couple tries, she finally tosses the bouquet up high in the air, making everyone’s head look up in the air. The flowers fly across the stage from Jihyo’s force, missing the people next to her, and landing on Jeongyeon’s arms. Everyone looks at her with a surprised look as she seems shocked by what just happened. “Wait… I don’t want it,” and hands it over to Nayeon. The members laugh at Jeongyeon’s reaction and tease her at their table. 

The music begins to play, and some guests come up to the stage to dance. Sana approaches Momo and Nayeon, grabs their hand, and pulls them to the stage. They dance to the first song, and when it is over, they return and get Dahyun and Chaeyoung to join. Jihyo laughs as she watches the members dance to the music, “Want to dance?” “What about Jisoo?” you ask. “Let's take her with us!” 

You carry Jisoo in your arms and make your way down the stage. Jihyo moves towards the stage and dances with the rest of the members. With Jisoo in your arms, you grab hers and move along to the music. She laughs every time you spin around and asks you for a hug. Jihyo comes towards you and dances along with Jisoo. 

After a couple of songs, Jisoo and the rest of the children fall asleep and get taken to one of the rooms to rest.

You perform a dance for the last two songs and have some of the members as backup dancers. The first dance is a mashup of various songs, both in English and in Korean. The guests are surprised by how well you move and applaud when you dance, as well as the dance machine. For the last dance, it's a solo dance, and you have a chair placed in the middle of the stage. This dance was something that the members chose for you as a bet and were first hesitant about. After some convincing and practice, it's time to do your solo performance. The announcer says, “We need a female volunteer for this performance!” Chaeyoung raises her hand but is told by my Nayeon that they must give someone else a chance. Immediately, Chaeyoung’s mom extends her hand, then some of the other of the mothers, including Samantha’s partner who immediately gets shut down, Sejeong, and Jeongyeon’s sister. 

“Chaeyoung’s mom, chaeyoung’s mom,” shout the members while Chaeyoung herself is covering her face of embarrassment. “Please, no, don’t do it.” 

Momo runs and escorts Chaeyoung’s mom to the chair in the middle of the stage. She places her arm on the armrest. “Alright everyone, this performance by the groom is something that the members choose, be advised.” 

The music starts slowly, and you massage her shoulders behind the chair. She gets goosebumps to your touch, and you knee in front of her, grabbing her hand and kissing it. She covers her mouth, trying to stop herself from shouting but can’t stop herself when you hover over her thighs and place her hands on your butt. You put your arms around her shoulders and behind to grind above her. You can hear the members shouting, “It’s so hot! Grab his ass!” You let go, back up a couple of steps, rip off your white dress shirt, and throw it to the ground, causing the audience to shout even louder.

Meanwhile, chaeyoung can’t help but feel completely embarrassed watching her mother getting a lap dance from her oppa. Jeongyeon’s sister whistles when she sees your toned abs, causing Jeongyeon to glare in her direction. “I baby Sana found herself a good man; look how hot his body looks,” says Sana’s mom. 

You walk around the chair, grab her hand, stand her up, and spin her around. Holding her hands, you get behind her and show her off to the audience. You turn and sit on the chair with her on your lap, making everyone scream again when you pretend to kiss her neck. You can hear her breath heavy and switch positions. You get on the floor and grind just above it, flip, and lay flat on the ground. You get up quickly and, in front of her, place her hands on your abs. She can help but look around and see the audience cheering for her to touch the abs. She caresses your abs, and once she gets comfortable, you get on top of her thighs, wrap your arms around her shoulders, and grind on her. She grabs your butt and gives it a couple of smacks. After a couple of seconds, you make her stand and guide her hands to wrap around your neck and you on her waist. The members shout in disbelief when you easily pick her up and wrap her legs around your waist. You talk a couple of steps to the side of the stage towards the member’s view and slowly place her on the ground. With her legs in the air, she tries to cover her face when she sees you grind on her in a mating press position. The audience again goes wild as you grind on her in different positions, and then the lights go dark.

The music stops, and there is a slight silence. The lights turn back on, and you can see Chaeyoung’s mom fanning herself with her hand and her face completely red. 

The members can believe how good your performance was and are jealous of Chaeyoung’s mom. The mothers laugh at what they just saw, and the dads are glad their wives didn’t go up there. On the other hand, you take a couple of shots to cool yourself down and get positive feedback from multiple people. “Oppa, when will I get a dance like that?” asks Sana and Momo. “Haha, let me just process what I just did. I can’t believe I actually did that. 

The party continues, and people have a good time. As time goes by, people begin to leave and say their goodbyes. “It was a great wedding; congratulations to you both.” 

———

You and Jihyo take a helicopter ride to one of the other islands to get to your honeymoon house. Once you arrive at the location, you see your belongings in the living room as you carry Jihyo in your arms. You head to the master bedroom, open the door, and place Jihyo on the bed. Being both tipsy, you undress each other until you both are completely nude. With Jihyo flat on the bed and her beautiful body fully exposed, you give her a night to remember. 

Jihyo moans as you play with her breast; she grabs your cheeks and says, “Just fuck me around. I’ve been horny since the lap dance.” Holding your member with your right hand, you align yourself to her entrance; she wraps her arms around your waist and pulls you towards her, causing your cock to penetrate her. She arcs as she feels your feel length enter her tight body and shouts when she feels the head of your cock in the deepest part of her womb. “Fuck me rough, show the world that I’m your woman, your wife.” Seeing the lust in her eyes, you start out with a fast thrust. “Yes! Just like that, fuck me with your huge cock!” Hearing her moaning gets you pumped even more. 

“Ahh, ahh, your fat cock feels so good!”

“You like being fucked by this cock?”

“Ahhh… yes! Your cock is so big, it stretches me out so well. Ahh fuck!” 

“What about this?” You pull out your cock, only leaving the tip, and shove it back in.”

“Fuck… YES! Fuck me faster, harder, breed me!”

“Where do you want me cum?”

“Inside… cum inside.”

“I didn’t hear you. What did you say?”

“I…I said cum inside; fill my cunt with your seed.”

After thrusting for some time, you both reach your orgasm. Jihyo shakes and arches her back when she reaches her peak. “Ahh…I…I’m cumming!” 

You beat your meat stick enough to see her finish her orgasm, and once it's over, you get on top of her and penetrate her in one go. Her eyes go wide when she feels your length split her open. “I’m cumming!” Hearing that makes her grab onto your waist, ensuring you fill her up with your load. Jihyo’s eyes roll back when she feels her womb fill up with your baby batter, “Ahh… it feels so warm.” 

With the first round being over, you focus on her breasts and attach yourself to one of her breasts. With her nipple in your mouth, you start to suckle, drinking her precious clear liquid and going down your throat. 

After quenching your thirst, Jihyo turns over and gets on all fours, “Ready for the second round?” You give her a smile and a nice smack on the ass, making her moan. She wiggles her butt around, ready for your meat to pound again. With both hands, you open her cheeks and get a good view of her leaking slit and pucker hole. “I know what you’re thinking, but not today. Remember, we have a long day tomorrow.” 

“Dang, maybe another time and slap her ass once more.” With your cock in hand, you collect some of the mixture of nectar and cum as lube and align yourself to her entrance. You push Jihyo’s back, making her ass lift up even more, and press your body on top of her. With your whole weight on her, Jihyo whines, “Ohh fuck, you’re heavy.” You don’t give her time to adjust as you thrust deep inside her. With every movement, she grunts, “Hmmm… fuck, hmm… so good.” 

After much thrusting, she demands, “Get off; I’m going to ride you.” You pull out your cock and get off of Jihyo and turn over. Jihyo slowly gets on top of you, grabs your hardened cock, and aligns it to her entrance. She interlocks hands with you and watch as her cunt slowly swallows your cock. The feeling is euphoric, her walls tightening up as you invade her insides. “I can feel your cock going up my tummy,” as she traces her finger from her pelvis to her belly button. “Look, you can even see the bulge of your cock inside of her,” pointing at the tip of your cock. “It’s because your body is so tight.” She likes your compliment and starts to ride you at a medium pace. She likes watching you enjoy her body which makes her even more horny and increases the speed. With her body bouncing, you can’t help but admire her two pairs of melons as they jump and sway from side to side. 

“Oppa, I’m about to cum, let's finish together.” You nod as she lifts herself and slams back with such force that it causes her to arch back and you to choke up. Her legs get tighter as she releases her love juice on your lower region, “Ahhh…I’m cumming!” 

“Fuck! I’m cumming too!” as your floodgates open and gush into Jihyo’s womb. Jihyo then slips off your cock and onto the bed right next to you. “That felt so good, honey,” and rubs her head to your chest. You pull her next to you and cuddle until she falls asleep, “I’m going to make you the happiest wife.” 

[togrowoldinv]

Behind the Scenes

Scarlett Johansson x Reader

When you’re nervous to film a kiss scene, Scarlett eases your worries

Note: I haven’t written Scarlett in forever, but I got this idea the other day! Follow my library blog @togrowoldinvlibrary for fic updates!

Scarlett Johansson Masterlist, Main Masterlist

“And we’re rolling!” You hear the director say.

Scarlett, acting as Natasha, runs up to you and starts saying her lines. Your mind goes completely blank thinking about what’s coming next.

Actually getting cast in a role in a Marvel movie was beyond your wildest dreams, but the day came a few months ago. You had auditioned expecting no callback or anything, but before you even left that day they told you that were perfect for the part.

And you were ecstatic.

Naturally, you knew nothing about the plot of the movie or who’d you would even be interacting with.

But this week you were handed a script with a scene with the Black Widow. The hero you have been crushing on for years, and now you have to act opposite to her.

Your nerves increased when you read the script further and discovered you have a kiss scene with her.

That’s why now as she speaks, your mind is reeling and your lines slip from your brain.

“We need a diversion,” she repeats her line. “So, they won’t know it’s us,” she tries to pull you back into the scene, but you falter.

Your hands are sweaty and she notices your hesitation.

Scarlett stops trying to keep the scene going. She turns to the camera, “Can we take a break?”

“We have to get this scene done today,” comes the mumbles of the director.

“We will. Give me ten minutes?”

They reluctantly agree. Before you can run off the stage in the direction of, well anywhere but here, a soft hand grabs yours.

“Hey, come with me,” Scarlett says.

She takes you outside to a small picnic area and the fresh air does immediately help you a little feel better. But you’re still nervous as you’ve ever been.

She ushers you to sit down on a bench with her. Scarlett puts her arm behind you, not touching you, but close enough that you feel your pace quicken.

“What’s going on, sweetheart? You always nail your scenes,” Scarlett says.

“I think I’m just nervous,” you admit shyly. She makes an adorable thinking face and you elaborate a little more. “About the- our kiss.”

“Ohhh I see,” Scarlett says. “Well you don’t need to worry about that. It’s easy. Just pretend I’m your girlfriend or something.”

You shake your head and she connects the dots.

“You haven’t?” She asks. You look down at your feet. “That’s alright. Hey, look at me.”

Scarlett’s hand comes to your cheek as she guides you to look at her. You’re immediately lost in the green of her eyes.

“Would you feel more comfortable if we tried it out here first?” She asks.

“I- um- maybe?” You reply.

She smiles at you.

“Okay, sweetheart. I’m going to lean and you tell me to stop if you don’t want to do this, okay?” Scarlett says, already leaning in. You nod. “I need to hear you say it.”

“Okay, yes ma’am.”

“Good,” she replies.

She’s only an inch from touching her lips to yours when she hesitates for just a moment.

“Relax, baby,” she whispers before she presses her lips against yours.

They’re barely there but the feeling makes your head dizzy. It’s over too soon, you think. You open your eyes and she’s smirking at you. You can’t help but smile too.

“Let’s try it one more time,” she says. “Kiss me back this time?”

“I’ll try,” you say and she chuckles.

“Just do what comes naturally.”

This time she leans in quicker and connects her lips with yours more intensely. You kiss back, and if the soft whimper she lets out when you do is any indication, then you’re doing well.

Scarlett pulls away and rests her forehead against yours.

“Wow,” she whispers.

Caught up in the moment, you kiss her lips again softly.

“I’m sorry!” You say as you abruptly stop kissing her and stand up.

“Don’t apologize!” She says. She comes to you and turns you around with a hand on your waist. “Just kiss me again.”

Scarlett doesn’t give you time to reply. She kisses you again and it’s the best one yet. Her tongue asks for entrance and you don’t deny her. The kiss continues until someone opens the door.

“Oh! I guess you guys are ready for the kiss scene!” Elizabeth says as she clothes the door again.

You laugh shyly and Scarlett takes your hand.

“Are you ready?” She asks.

“Let’s do it,” you reply.

Before you get to the door, Scarlett stops walking and turns to you.

“We should do this again sometime,” she suggests.

“Oh- yeah sure yes,” you get shy again.

“Dinner tonight?” She asks. You nod in agreement, too stunned to speak.

Scarlett kisses your cheek and opens the door.

You follow after her now ready more than ever for a kiss with her.

[christinesficrecs]

Hi Christine, I know this is a long shot but long story short - lost my saves file a while ago and cannot find many of most favourite fics, I have countless quotes saved from them. I am sharing some with you in hopes people recognise the fics they're from if you post this. I will love you forever.

Derek’s first kiss in four years tastes like fresh-squeezed orange juice and makes his stomach flip like the drop in a rollercoaster. Stiles holds him close like he’s thanking him.

About the summer he spent in Ireland because there were pictures of his mom posed in various tourist sites at Dublin and Dingle and the Giant’s Causeway--places that he wanted to experience personally since he never got to ask her first-hand.

Derek looked at him for a moment, and wow, okay, this was why people wrote songs about love and painted pictures and wrote poetry, because he was pretty sure that he was falling in love with Derek Hale if only because of the guy's beautiful eyes and earnest expressions and his everything. God.

In some ways Stiles has done a lot of growing up since then, but a part of him thinks he’ll always be that scrawny, ridiculous kid at heart, whose greatest joys in life were Froot Loops, cheesy disco tunes, and masturbation.

Stiles gets back from his year abroad in Hungary with more muscles and the first of his tattoos, a knotted rope that runs the length of his spine.

Hey, Derek, can you do me a solid? Nothing serious, just, you know, screw my brains out, that’s all.

He meets Stiles’ gaze from where he's leaning against the back wall, his eyes catching glints of light amid the shadows. Certain people are just meant to live under the open sky.

Whatever he says afterwards, whatever happens between them, there will always be this, the long late afternoon with the sun skidding red in the west, and he will always know what Stiles looked like the first time someone filled him up to the hilt. There are no acrobatics. Nothing fancy happens. Derek feels like the ocean breaking helplessly on the shore, the tide rising, spilling him over.

there’s something about the shape of him, the way he’s huge and solid and beautiful and always thirty seconds away from admitting total defeat that rubs Stiles raw and tender.

“People are so exhausting,” he murmurs, and Stiles is glad to know it: that he isn’t people, that he counts as a kind of between places, maybe even as home.

Updating with the ones that magv1 found. Thank you!!!

Hot Single Dad Derek Hale by WhoNatural | 13.3K | Explicit

Wherein Derek is a Hot Single Dad, possibly with a little case of martyrdom, and Stiles is the newest client at his publishing house who really just wants to make him happy. Preferably while they're both naked.

^^^^^ #1 & 2

But Then What... by Stoney | 24.3K | Explicit

Senior year is almost over, and all Stiles needs to do is keep his head down to survive. A teacher calls in a favor, leaving him stuck tutoring Derek Hale, one of the most popular jocks in school and a member of a group of douchecanoes who have bullied Stiles for years. He's someone Stiles totally hates. Totally. Like, doesn't like him even a little bit. DEFINITELY isn't attracted to him.

Except that is a total lie. Fuck his life, seriously.

^^^^^ #3

My Life is not a Horror Movie, Derek by DiscontentedWinter | 38.9K | Explicit

Stiles keeps dreaming of people in robes with knives. With chanting. In Latin. And he mentioned the knives, right? That can't be good.

^^^^^ #4

i need your sway by thatworldinverted | 11.1K | Explicit

Stiles always figured it would be Scott who saw him through his first heat. They pinky-swore on it, in fact, when they were eleven and newly-presented. There haven’t exactly been an abundance of offers between then and now.

What there is now, though, is the pack, and pack takes care of each other.

^^^^^ #6

Sucker Love by whiskey_in_tea | 17.9K | Explicit

Kate sits up and narrows her eyes at him. “Page 72,” she says. “Why I Plan to Wait, by Stiles Stilinski.”

The spread is hilariously cliched: a full page picture of a pale, pretty boy with a wide-eyed blonde girl walking on the beach, the two of them holding hands and staring into the waves, probably thinking wistfully of the sex they aren’t having. Derek skims the text briefly. “Speaking up about the importance of virginity!” he exclaims. “Reclaiming chastity a a masculine virtue. Our friend Stiles sure is brave.”

“See, I was thinking he might make an interesting challenge,” Kate says lazily. “And he’s surprisingly attractive, don’t you think? Such long fingers. And that mouth.”

^^^^^ #8

[mjolnirswriststrap]

Just Another Notch

Bucky Barnes x Plus!Reader Masterlist

Summary: If Bucky thinks his charms will work on you, then you’re gonna put up one hell of a fight to prove him wrong. PART 4/? Part 5

An: Hey all, sorry I haven’t updated this baby in months. Gonna try and work on it more from now on. Hopefully it’ll be finished before the end of the year 🤞💜

Word Count: 1,278 (not proofread)

You never found him. After trekking through a path of destruction you realized, you didn’t know where exactly Bruce lives; better yet anywhere besides the lab he considers home. Once large foot prints and fallen trees ceased, so did your trail. You haven’t yet trained on tracking, so someone on foot could allude you indefinitely.

When you made it back to the compound, Friday announced “Stark will see you in his office, Ms. Y/L/N.”. You hadn’t even walked in the door, and already Bruce’s mess was piling up on your lap. As if you had control over a gamma radiated mutant.

Tony had another thing coming If he thinks you’ll pay damages. Your salary consisted of room and board, and a part time paycheck that you sent home to help your parents. Solid wood floors weren’t in your budget.

When you make it to Tony’s office it looks crowded. You can see Natasha, Steve and Bucky all standing around his desk, arms crossed with annoyed looks on their faces. This isn’t good, and it’s all your fault, you should’ve swallowed it, never mentioned it to Bruce.

You knock on the glass door, catching the attention of the the most attractive people you’ve ever seen. Their harsh gaze made you wish your X gene was invisibility. “You wanted to see me, Stark?” You pipe up, hoping the faster you get this over with, the easier it will be. You brave your face to the room, not putting your head down in shame. You won’t let this destroy you, you won’t let bullying ruin the workplace confidence you’d grown.

Tony rolls his eyes, “You know why you’re here, don’t play coy kid.”. Without hesitation You immediately start defending yourself, “I want to be the first one to apologize for the gym floor. I cannot excuse Bruce’s actions, they were not justified in any manor. Destruction of property over measly feelings, if not already, should be a fireable offense. I however have done nothing wrong. I played a part in telling Bruce about the situation, but I never could have foresaw this outcome.” Your chest is heaving when you finish. You’ve kept a neutral look on your face the entire time, meanwhile Tony’s face morphed into confusion, suprise, confusion again and then agreeance.

“Wow, the things I miss not living here.” He laughs, like it was some kind of joke. “I have no clue what you’re talking about, but I’d love for you to tell me the full story later.” You straighten your shoulders, what had you just done? Not only did you snitch on Bruce and yourself, but your pathetic plea was witnessed by three devils. Why are you here then?

You hadn’t done anything else wrong, you haven’t even been on a mission in forever. “Oh, my apologies then, I don’t know why I’m here.” You admit. Now you were unbearably nervous, you didn’t know what to expect. Tony opened a tab on his touch pad inlaid desk, pulling up the picture of an obviously foreign man. His menacing scowl only meant one thing, Hydra.

“Bruno Müller, age 37, served as a hitman for Hydra, much like yours truly.” He waves over to Bucky, giving him stank face. You nod your head, trying to take mental notes. “He was seen last night, on a yacht off the Florida Keys. Intel is saying, he’s hosting a party this weekend, and I want you to be in attendance.” Your head is spinning, you struggle to find the right words.

“What- I mean why me? You have many more capable agents at your disposal.” You’ve lost that workplace professionalism in place of confidence. You know you shouldn’t speak to your boss this way, but who does he think you are, Captain America?

“I would agree to disagree on that. Do not sell yourself short, your capabilities are more than qualified for this mission. But the truth is, no one knows you. You’re faceless.” You try to not let his last words hurt, but you suppose he’s right. It would be a simple plan, get in and get out, right? “What am I doing?” You ask, trying to fit the other three people into the plan somehow. “I need you to first, immerse yourself into this party, let everyone know you’re there. Talk with the women, flirt with the men, drink but don’t get drunk. If someone on this boat has a suspicion of you, it will take a minute for renforcements to arrive. Meaning, fighting off 30+ angry Hydra all by yourself.” He was blatant.

Your anxiety was starting to pick up. You’re not sure you can do it. The two super soldiers behind you instantly notice the shift in your mood. They see the hair on the back of your neck stand, and they can smell the sheen of sweat covering your body. Steve genuinely feels pity for you.

Tony continues, “Infiltrate his office, access his computer and download all of his files onto this bad boy right here.” He pulls a bracelet out of thin air. He gently unclasps it, revealing a usb drive hidden inside. “The second you plug it in, a virus will download onto his computer, corrupting the files, for any further use, and it will immediately download them, bypassing any need for passwords.”

Once he finished you had nothing to say. Well, you had plenty to say, but you couldn’t be sure that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself further. “So, why are they here?” You finally ask, daring to make eye contact with Steve. His eyes weren’t as harsh as you expected.

“Every secret agent needs an intel team, and a guy in their ear, these two are your intel team, and Barnes is your new conscious.” Great. Now instead of playing along with him, you’re forced to be in their presence. You let the heroes behind you groan in place. They must’ve already debriefed, they had no witty remarks or protests.

“When do I leave?” You ask, just wanting to get out of the room at this point. You need to let yourself process everything, before you overload and overstimulate. “Tonight.” You give him a curt nod and leave before your team could ask you any questions. There would be plenty of time for that on the flight there.

Your brain is racing. Maybe it’s the combination of everything happening so far today and it’s only 9am. Or it’s the straps on the sports bra absolutely obliterating your shoulders. You’re pacing down to the simulation room, the only place you can go to escape.

You’re manically talking to yourself when you swing the door open. “How the actual fuck does he expect me to do this alone?” You ask no one. Seeing the empty desk chair Bruce left in its exact spot was enough to send you crumbling to your feet. Pressing your back against the door, squeezing your knees as close to your chest as possible. Bruce isn’t even here to console you because you fucked that up too. You bang the back of your head on the door, “What the fuck is wrong with me?”.

You doubt you’d see Bruce before you left, which meant you wouldn’t see him till you returned, which is never promised, better yet scheduled. You needed answers, why did be react like that? Wrapping your head around it was impossible, unbeknownst to you, Bruce sat pressed against his front door, his head in his hands, wondering why he can’t control his anger. Wondering if he’d scared you away forever, you’d never seen him as hulk before, just Bruce. He knew you liked just Bruce, but now there’s no telling.

[nolita-fairytale]

make my heart surrender | carmy berzatto x fem!reader | chapter six: monday

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader

warnings: lots of swearing, angst, use of she/her pronouns, friends to lovers, references to sex, no use of y/n, second person pov

word count: 3.4k

summary: it's your last full day in chicago and you and carmy talk about the future of your relationship.

a/n: wow can you believe we're in the home stretch? i have one more chapter for all of you that are reading about our loveable kitchen idiots, but i'm definitely not done with these two.

read: part five | masterlist

Monday 

“What’re you doing?” he asks, his morning voice gruff with sleep, his comment making you laugh. 

“You haven’t even opened your eyes. You don’t know if I’m doing shit,” you reply. 

“Yes, I do. I can feel you,” he shoots back, peeking one eye open. 

You’re tracing your fingertips along his little tattoos that run along his right arm, propped up on your side: the angels below his elbow, the little fish on the inside of his forearm, the snail right above his wrist, then finally, his chef’s knife-hand tattoo on the back of his hand.

“Stop, ‘s creepy,” Carmy groans, throwing one of his hands over his eyes. 

“What?”

“You’re watching me sleep,” he grumbles, earning a laugh from you. 

It’s the third morning in a row that you’ve woken up together, and as the morning light floods into his bedroom once again, he doesn’t have the heart to ask you to close the curtains. He can’t bear the idea of you getting out of bed and leaving his side. He makes a mental note to close the damn curtains better next time. 

You giggle at his comment, beginning to to leave soft kisses up his arm, around his shoulder, across his chest, until he’s pulling you on top of him, a sleepy smile on his face. 

He could get fuckin’ used to this.

“It’s not creepy,” you protest softly, in between kisses.

Instead of coming up with a smartass reply, all he says is:

“Morning.”

“Morning,” you answer, leaning down to kiss him. 

You snuggle into him your legs wrapping around his hip as you rest your head on one side of his chest, curled up to his side. 

“What do you want to do today?” he asks, rubbing his eyes, accepting that he’s going to have to get up eventually.

“Hmm.. well, you promised me a true Chicago date,” you prompt him. 

“I did.” 

You reach over, intertwining your fingers with his opposite hand this time, as you bring it up to your lips to kiss each letter tattooed on his knuckles: S, O, U. 

Sense of urgency.

“This is new,” he says, holding your hand up to the light, taking a look at your most recent tattoo. It starts at your wrist and extends all the way down your forearm, stopping just underneath the crease of your elbow. 

“Yeah, you don’t get to be the only cool one with ink,” you hit back, playfully. “I also have a new little one on my rib cage.”

“Yeah, I-, I noticed that,” he says, his lips curling into a smirk, knowing that he’s only seen it because he’s seen you naked. 

“Oh you did, huh?”

“Yeah.”

He waits a beat before returning to the topic at hand. He turns his head towards you, your face only inches away from his now.

“Thought we could take a walking dumpling tour of Chinatown. You know… like we used to do,” he suggests.

Memories of your adventures up and down Mott St. and Bowery come flooding back to you and you can’t help but grin. You’re honestly glad he remembers. 

“Sounds incredible.”

You wait a beat as the sobering reality of the day – your last day in Chicago – hits you. 

“We should get up and shower,” you sigh, reluctantly.

If you weren’t such an overthinker, you’d stay in Chicago forever. Pay rent to Pete and Sugar on your airbnb till you could find a place. If this were a movie, or a fantasy, you wouldn’t even think twice. Hell, you wouldn’t even go back for your stuff in New York. As long as you could stay here, in this bed with this beautiful man, who needed a fuckin’ IKEA dresser?

But your brain is quickly flooded with questions, logistics, ‘what ifs’ that hold you back from your desire to be impulsive. You’re also freaking out. This feels so good – too good – it’s near terrifying. You can feel your self-saboteur creeping up within you, but you’re quick to squash that little voice in your head that takes your doubts too far. 

“Yeah, we should,” he agrees. “You go ahead. I just wanna lay here for a second.”

“Meet me in there?” you ask, as you sit up for a quick peck on the lips. 

He nods in response as you begin to move. 

You groan as you force yourself up and out of bed, wearing only an old Original Beef Chicagoland t-shirt. You’d found it in the laundry basket with a bunch of other clean, yet unfolded clothes he hadn’t put away. The cold air hits your skin as you hiss at the impact. Carmy watches your every move, still convinced this is all a dream. You know exactly what you’re doing as you strip the t-shirt off, revealing your bare body underneath, tossing it on the floor and making your way to the bathroom. 

“But don’t keep me waiting for too long.”

Carmy hears the sound of the water running and he shakes his head. You’re a piece of work – he’ll give you that. He sits up, wondering how any of this could be real.

*

You spend the rest of the day exploring Chicago and Carmy realizes it’s been quite some time since he explored the city he grew up in. So much has changed…. You’d taken a twenty five minute bus ride from River North down to Chinatown, and had allowed yourself just to roam. You had missed these grand adventures with him: from stops for pork dumplings, to arguing over who gets to pay the bill, to returning back to a community botanical garden you’d passed earlier. 

“Wait. You’re not kidding?!” you exclaim at the outrageous statement he’s just made. “Noooo, no, no, no.Take it back!”

“Nope. No! I’m not taking it back,” he protests, stubbornly.

“Okay, don’t get me wrong,” you clarify. “Because the pork buns were good. But you can’t possibly think that there’s a better pork bun than… what was it called?”

“You can’t even remember the name,” Carmy scoffs, playfully. “How can it be that good then?”

“Oh fuck off. It was the place we liked, right next to that uh, that pharmacy with the green awning. Oh! And the menu was always printed on neon green paper taped in the window – no English, just pictures. You don’t remember?” you ask, raising an eyebrow at him. 

He certainly remembers, but he’s enjoying giving you a hard time. 

“I’m just saying. I think they might be the best pork buns in the country.”

He shakes his head, sighing out your name. 

“I don’t know. I think the entire population of San Francisco would take offense to that statement,” he challenges you.

“Well, we’re not talking about San Francisco, Carmen,” you point out, using his full name just to one up him. 

“Hey uh. I don’t know if you noticed but… San Francisco is actually a part of this country,” he pushes back, being a smartass. 

“Oh it is?” you reply back, sarcastically. “I had no idea. Thank you so much for enlightening me.”

The banter between the two of you is your favorite kind of foreplay. You’ve missed this.

He pauses, redirecting his attention to Chicago. 

“So what?” he teases. “You're gonna come into my city and insult it like that? Okay. I see how it is.”

He holds the cigarette that’s previously been in between his index finger and middle finger back into his mouth now. You watch as it sits between his lips, deciding to push his buttons a little further. 

“Jesus Christ,” you shake your head, playfully scoffing. “I can’t believe you’re smoking in a freakin’ community garden, Carmen.”

“What? We’re outside. I didn’t see a no-smoking sign when we came in. Shit…” he groans, somehow managing to keep the cigarette in between his lips. 

“You gonna put it out?” you shoot back. 

“No.”

“Well, fine. Then give me some,” you say, reaching for it. 

“I thought you were trying to quit,” Carmy’s quick to rebut you, grabbing it out of his mouth and holding it above your head. He’s not that much taller than you, but you can tell he’s having a little too much fun with this game of keepaway. 

“Carmy!” you exclaim with a laugh, pulling his arm down.

“No! You said you were trying to quit.”

“I never said that!” “Yes you did. You looked at me and you said, ‘I’m trying to cut back, Car.’”

“That doesn’t mean-. That’s not the same!”

“Yes, it is.”

“No it’s-, fuck you.”

He laughs, shaking his head before turning to you, almost as a challenge. He raises his eyebrows before asking:

“You really want to spend our last full day together arguing?”

“Well, when we’re so good at it…” you banter back, flirtatiously. 

Finally… finally, he leans in to kiss you. You can taste the cigarette on his breath that you’d fought him so hard for. The both of you stop in the middle of the walkway, earning a few looks from a few people passing by. Carmy’s tries to fight the surprise he’s feeling – still trying to adjust to the fact that someone, let alone you, would want to kiss him in broad daylight.

You laugh, pulling away from the kiss before grabbing his arm as the two of you continue your walk along the carved out pathway. 

He doesn’t want this to end. 

He never wants this to end. 

But his own words echo in his head – about this being your last day with him. Your week in Chicago is coming to an end, sending panic all throughout his body if he thinks about it for too long. He knows that all he has to do is say something – ask you to stay – and he’s not sure what he’s fucking waiting for. The words have built up within him, gotten stuck in his throat, and he’s swallowed them, scared absolutely shitless. 

He can hear Mikey’s voice in his head as the words are on the tip of his tongue. 

Let it rip. 

Don’t be a fuckin’ idiot. You can’t let her go!

 Let it rip, Carm.

With your fingers so gently intertwined between his, he can feel his hand getting clammy as he contemplates what he’s about to say. 

“I don’t want this to be the end,” he blurts out, catching you off guard. 

You stop. You’re not sure why you’re so surprised. You’ve been thinking about it too, afterall, but you half expected that you’d have to be the one to bring this up. 

“I don’t want this to be the end either,” you confess, your voice soft as you lose yourself in the way he’s looking at you right now. 

He’s relieved, almost surprised. 

“You don’t?”

You shake your head, chuckling at his reaction. 

“No, of course not! This is-, these past few days have been….”

“Yeah,” he agrees, a small smile threatening the corners of his lips. 

“Yeah.”

You exchange glances, and how much you care for each other is evident in each others’ eyes.

“It’s just that-. Well. Do you-, do you want to… sit?” you suggest, gesturing towards one of the park benches. 

He’s not sure why, but his stomach drops as he anticipates what you’re about to say. You seem serious… uncertain… even after what you both just said. 

“Yeah, of… ‘course,” he stammers, following you as you lead him towards a park bench. 

You take a seat, sitting side by side as you stare at the ground. His eyes are on you and he wonders why you’re avoiding his gaze. He rubs his palms together, feeling just how clammy they’ve gotten. He’s so fucking nervous he feels like he could jump out of his skin.

“I think. Well, I think that maybe we-. Well, I won’t speak for you but, I think maybe I’ve felt this way for you for a long time,” you begin, finally meeting his gaze with yours. 

It’s just, if you look at him for too long, you may not say what you need to say. 

“I think maybe… we were ignoring a lot of things. You know? Back in New York,” you continue, trying your best to articulate where your head's at. 

“I don’t-, I really thought for a while we could just be friends. And I was okay with that. But then we slept together… and when you left New York, I guess I just realized how much of a space in my life you were filling for me… you know… the kind of space…” you pause, suddenly afraid to say the word, as if it’s going to send him running for the hills. 

“... the kind of space a boyfriend would fill up, you know?”

Boyfriend. 

Right. 

“Woah,” Carmy sounds, hearing it out loud for the first time. 

“Yeah. It feels just as weird to say.”

And suddenly, you feel shy.

You both take a beat. Carmy’s still hung up on the whole ‘boyfriend’ part, and you’re trying to figure out how best to proceed.

“I mean, am I just fucking crazy to think that-, I don’t know. That after one week of… and it’s only been a couple of days, of us, you know… doing this,” you stammer through.

“No, you’re not-, it’s not crazy for thinking that-,” he starts, before stopping again. 

He wants you to say it: that you’ll stay. God, does he want you to say it. 

And he also knows that he hasn’t asked you yet. Hell, he’s still reeling from you bringing up the word ‘boyfriend.’ It’s not like you can read his mind – know that he wants nothing more than to be your boyfriend. 

“I want to make this clear first. I’m just-, I really want to be with you,” you say, speaking plainly enough, leaving no room for a misunderstanding. “But I don’t want to be presumptuous that you also-.”

“No I-.”

The words feel like boulders, falling out of his mouth. 

“I want… that too.”

Let it rip, buddy. 

Carmy’s opening his mouth to say something else, but you’ve beat him to the punch as you continue with,

“But… right now, we live in different cities and… I know long distance can be a lot of work.”

Were you having second thoughts?

“This is all just happening so fast and it’s a lot of change-. Dating is one thing but moving is a whole other thing for me to wrap my head around. It would be a lot of change for me if I-,” you try to explain. You let out a laugh before allowing yourself to be vulnerable – hoping it wouldn’t discourage him at all.

“I’m just kind of freaking out here, Car,” you confess. “And I also am kinda wondering where your head’s at too.”

And it feels like a weight’s been lifted off of the both of you. He laughs in relief along with you, shaking his head. 

“Thank god,” he sighs, and it’s liberating. 

“You too?”

“Yeah I-. Fuck yeah I’m freaking out,” Carmy reassures you, glad that you’re both on the same page. 

You both exchange a look, sharing a hopeless laugh, and in that moment, neither of you need words to understand how you feel about each other. You’re both head over fuckin’ heels for each other. You reach over, giving his hand a squeeze, satisfied with that as an answer. 

You settle into a comfortable silence with each other, watching the power walkers, the parents pushing their kids in strollers, the jogger running with their dog. While you’re glad you’ve gotten that out of the way, Carmy still has yet to tell you where he’s at. He repeats the words he’s had in his head, over and over again. 

He doesn’t want to scare you, but they’re eating at him, like if he doesn’t let it out, he’ll implode. 

You listening to me, Bear? 

Can you hear me?

C’mon man. Let it rip. 

“You could stay. If you wanted to. Just so you know,” Carmy blurts out, grabbing your attention. 

Okay. Okay. Try not to fucking panic, you remind yourself. 

Now that he’s said the words out loud… now that they exist between the two of you – that they could be a reality. 

While you’d love nothing more than to say yes, you’re terrified, and all the change is terrifying. Like what if you said no and he decided to call the whole thing off? Even though you’re screaming internally, you try to approach it from a logical perspective. 

“How-, how would that work?” you ask, teetering the line between hesitation and curiosity. 

He shrugs, feeling incredibly naked all over again, “You heard everyone the other day. I don’t think anyone would… hate you stickin’ around.”

“And Marcus. He’s learned so much from you in just a week. You guys could… I don’t know… he can’t do it all by himself. We’re gonna have to hire someone else to help out, anyways….” 

“Well, it’s Marcus’ domain. I wouldn’t want to intrude,” you reply. 

“No, I know! I-, well I’d have to talk to him first but I’m sure he’d be… more than happy to hear that you’d be-.”

You’re quiet as you let his words land, your thoughts running a mile a minute. 

“I’m not saying that… I haven’t made a decision yet,” you preface, wanting to be as clear as day here. “But if I decided to… you know. Well… I’d have to get my own apartment.”

“‘Course, yeah, of- of course,” he says, rushing to eliminate any thought that he’d have that expectation. 

As he hurries to squash the idea, he wonders why he feels a small pang of disappointment, like a pit in his stomach. It’s not like he expected that you’d just move in together, but he’s gotten used to waking up to you the last few days. 

You take another beat, letting yourself work through the thoughts you're having. 

“It’d be a lot of change, Carm. And I think I just need a second to like, wrap my fuckin’ head around it. Can I think about it?” you finally ask, hopeful that he’ll understand. 

It’s not him at all. You just need a fucking minute to catch up – to wrap your head around this relationship, and the possibility of moving here.

Because what if you move your whole life to Chicago for him, and it didn’t work out? You’d be crushed. 

Carmy is quiet, still reeling from the fact that he blurted out those words. 

“I’m-, I'm gonna have to go back to New York anyways. Tie up some loose ends. Tell the restaurant I’m not coming back. I got shit in storage too, and a lease I gotta figure out what to do with…”

“Yeah,” he finally says with a curt nod. 

There’s a part of him screaming at him to burn it all down. If he sabotages it now, it’ll save him the anxiety and the grief of waiting for your response… of the possibility that you could say ‘no’ and decide not to come back. And there’s another part of him that doesn’t want to let you go back to New York at all because what if you do say no? What if you never come back? What if, after this, you change your mind and he never sees you again? 

He snaps himself out of his doomsday ‘what if’ scenario and says, gaining a little more confidence, “No, yeah. Take-, take all the time you need.”

You’ve always been this way anyways. It’s just your M.O. You’ve always needed to think through things before making a decision, he reminds himself.

“Thank you for understanding, Carm.”

“I-,” you open your mouth to say something else, but nothing comes out because all you have left to say is:

I love you. 

But it feels too soon – even if you’ve felt this way about him for a long time. 

“I mean it,” he reinforces, even if he is faking some of his confidence. “You don’t have to thank me. Take all the time you need.”

You listen, choosing to be optimistic about the whole situation, like you know that you’re going to figure it out together.

“Besides, New York’s not so far away,” you offer up, taking a lighter tone this time. “And.. we both have phones. We can call each other, text… have phone sex.” 

He laughs. 

“We’re gonna figure it out. If you want to, at least,” you offer up, pausing once more. “You know. With me?”

He nods, shooting you his best reassuring look. 

He really does. 

He really would like nothing more than to figure it out with you.

read: part seven (epilogue)

taglist: @lazypeachsoul @bookwormvoyageuse @allthefandomstogether @gaysludge @sobshoney @harrysmatcha

[harlowsbby]

Forever Attached

Requested, late night calls with Jack while he’s away.

“Alright I think were all done here for today I’ll see you all tomorrow morning? For rehearsals yeah?” Nemo said and almost immediately Jack was out the door and headed back to his hotel room.

“Where is he going?” Ace asked as he watched Jack quickly leave the venue.

“Yeah I haven’t seen him run off that quick in my life.” 2fo added on.

“Y’all already know he’s in a rush to call Y/N, they stay on the phone all night.” Urban said.

“Really? How do you know I thought the two of you weren’t sharing rooms this tour.” Nemo asked.

“All ima say is the walls are very very thin.” Urban shivered at thought of possibly having to hear the two of you again tonight.

Ace and Nemo gave one another a knowing look and immediately felt pity on Urban.

When Jack arrived back to the hotel he quickly made his way to his room and locked the door behind him.

He sent you a quick text stating that he was going to shower real quick and that he’d call you right after. Being away from you was one of the hardest things Jack has ever had to do.

He loved being around you and making sure you’re always around him 24/7.

After a quick wash up he turned off the water and put on a pair of gray sweats, he didn’t bother putting on a shirt. He applied some lotion and a few hair products into his hair before leaving the bathroom and flopping onto the bed.

He looked at his phone seeing you had texted him back from earlier. He went to your contact and hit the FaceTime button after a few rings you finally answered.

“Damn about time I thought your ass fell asleep.”Jack joked as your face appeared on the screen. You rolled your eyes playfully as you sat up a bit in your bed so your face would be more visible.

“Let’s not do too much now Jack or else I’ll hang up, it’s already pass my bedtime.”

He always felt guilty whenever he’d call you so late even though you reassured him that you didn’t mind, he still felt guilty keeping you up.

“You wouldn’t hang up on me.” He teased and you looked at him with a eyebrow raised. “And what makes you say that?”

“Because you miss me.” You huffed. “I do miss you but you didn’t say you missed me? Wow I guess I’m chopped liver.” You faked cried, he smacked his lips.

“Here you go you know I miss you, I’ve been talking about you to the guys all day long.”

“Oh I know Urban had sent me a few videos of you reminiscing on our little gas station runs.” He cheeks started heating up. “He did? Ima beat his ass tomorrow.” You both laughed.

“I thought it was cute I can’t wait for you to come back home, this bed gets cold when you aren’t in it to keep me warm.” You pouted and faced the camera to show his side of the bed, that was now replaced with a Winnie a Pooh bear.

“Well it doesn’t seem that empty you’ve replaced me with a stuffed animal.” He gasped which made you laugh. “You’re so silly Jack.” You smiled.

“But that’s why you love me.” You nodded.

“That’s true but I love you for many other reasons.” That last sentence had you wanting to hear more.

“You care to name a few of them?” He asked. “I think you should go first.” He smacked his lips.

“Fine, I just hope Urban can’t hear me.”

He readjusted his spot on the bed so that was he was laying flat on his stomach and holding his phone up with his right hand.

Your stomach began to flutter as you studied his face. A few of his wet curls were sticking to the side of his face and the way his eyes always seemed to shimmer like the ocean always made you so weak.

“I’m waiting.” You song sang. “How many reasons do I have to give?” You thought about it for a few seconds.

“Give me 5.” He nodded his head and thought about it.

“I love you because you’re always there for me, you’re always making sure I’m doing well even when I push you away you just never give up on me.” He said.

“Three more reasons.” He laughed.

“You make me laugh, you’re my comfort person and lastly you complete me.” He paused. “I remember telling Urban how one day I just wanna meet someone that I can love on and call mine and I’m so glad I’m able to call you mine Y/N.”

“You’re my person too Jack, I’m so glad we found one another.” He smiled as well.

“Me too baby, me too. I can’t wait to fly you out. I miss you so fucking much you have no idea.”

You grinned. “Oh yeah? What do you plan on doing when I get there.” He smirked. “I can think of a few things.”

“A few things like what?” You whispered and before Jack was able to say something a knock came from his door followed by the door being unlocked.

“Urban? Ace?! What are you two doing? And how did you get a key to my room.” You watched with a hint of glee and entertainment.

“Tell him Urban.” Ace said and pushed Urban forward. “I mean I just came to ask if you know you’d keep it down tonight I didn’t get much sleep last night.” Urban mumbled.

“What do you mean?” Jack asked and that’s when your mouth dropped in horror.

“You could hear me?!?” Jack! I thought you said you weren’t sharing rooms with Urban that’s so embarrassing.” You yelled through the phone.

“I’m not! I guess the walls are super thin.” With the two of you being away from each other and not being able to physically touch one another, phone sex was really the only option you had to satisfy your personal needs.

“And why are you here Ace?” Ace shrugged his shoulders. “I got bored and by the way you’re such a simp I heard all the reasons as to why you love Y/N.” Ace teased.

“You’re my person I just love you so much.” Urban tried mimicking Jack.

“I prayed for times like this I’m just so glad I found you.” Ace added on.

“Oh Jack you’re just so sweet! I can’t wait to give you needless kisses.” Urban mimicked you and the two of them made kissing sounds, Jack’s cheeks grew red in embarrassment.

“You know what ima knock the both of you out since you wanna be all in my business.” Urban and Ace quickly ran out the door with Jack right behind them.

“Oh, so you’re just gonna leave me here.” You spoke though the phone as Jack’s phone laid on the bed.

“Jack! Come back and get me.” You yelled and huffed before hanging up the phone call.

[murmaiderii]

A BETTER WORLD CHAPTER 2: MABEL'S NONDENOMINATIONAL HOLIDAY BASH

NSFW, MDNI, also available on ao3

Dipper and Mabel's parents' names courtesy of @lomy-bloom

Ford packs the last of his shirts for his trip away. He was only planning on taking two outfits, one to sleep in and one to wear through the day. Odyssey, his girlfriend of just under a year, refused to let him wear the same unwashed outfit three days in a row. He insisted it was a more efficient use of space. She insisted that that was ridiculous. He looks at his girlfriend’s much larger suitcase on the bed and wonders how she can go through so many clothes in such a short trip.

“Honey, are you done packing?” Ford yells.

“One more thing!” She rushes into their shared bedroom and stuffs a toiletry bag in a suitcase pocket.

“I’ll pack up the car. Can you grab some snacks for us?”

“Gotcha.” Odyssey darts to the kitchen. Ford goes outside and drops their suitcases in the trunk. He waits for her in the driver’s seat. After a longer wait than he was expecting, she stumbles into the passenger seat and lets out a shuddering breath.

“What’s wrong, dear?” Ford takes her hand and rubs it with his thumb.

“Just… Jesus, I just know your family is gonna hate me,” she sighs. 

“That’s not true. Mabel and Dipper already like you,” he reassures her.

“Yeah, but they’re kids. It’s the adults I’m worried about. Everyone’s gonna accuse me of being a gold digger.”

“Let them think what they want. All that matters is what we think of each other.”

“They’re gonna call you a dirty old man, you know. People get super judgemental about age gaps.” Ford sighs.

“I admit, that has been on my mind. But we can’t hide from my family forever. Mabel would never forgive me if I missed one of her nondenominational holiday bashes.” Odyssey giggles at the name of the party. That niece of his sure has a flair for the dramatic. 

“Do we really have to stay at the house with everyone?”

“Mabel insists.”

“We won’t have any privacy. I dunno how I’m supposed to keep my hands off of you for three days,” she complains.

“We’ll just have to sneak out when we can,” Ford says with a blush.

“That’s kinda hot, actually. It’s like forbidden romance. Wanna get some practice fucking in the car before we go?” Ford chuckles.

“Odyssey, we’re already running late,” he reminds her.

“Fine, we’ll sneak out in the middle of the night. I guess let’s get this over with.” Ford gives her a kiss on the knuckles and starts the car for the seven hour drive.

“God, my ass is sore,” Odyssey complains. Ford parks on the crowded street outside of his nephew’s house. They get out of the car and unload their luggage. Despite her full bladder, Odyssey hesitates to go into the lively home. Ford puts a hand on the small of her back.

“Come on, honey. Stalling won’t make this any easier.” She groans and drops her head.

“Right, let’s rip the bandaid.” Ford slips his hand from her back to hold Odyssey’s. They approach the door. Ford squeezes Odyssey’s hand and knocks on the door. Ford and Odyssey are both relieved to be greeted by Mabel.

“Great uncle Ford!” She launches herself into Ford’s arms. He fondly laughs. “It’s been too long!”

“Good to see you again, Mabel. Now, I know you’ve been eager to meet Odyssey.” Mabel lets go of her uncle to give Odyssey a big hug.

“Heya, Mabel. Thanks for inviting me to your party,” Odyssey says. 

“Pfft, don’t mention it. I’ve been waiting my whole life to be able to invite one of Fordsy’s girlfriends.” Mabel leans into Odyssey’s ear to whisper. “There haven’t been any until now.”

“Mabel!” Ford whines.

“It’s okay, babe. She’s not telling me anything I didn’t know.”

“Wow, ‘babe.’ You guys are the cutest.” Mabel flicks her wrist and guides the couple inside. All sorts of family members whose identities Odyssey doesn’t know mingle through the house. 

“Uncle Ford, you’re finally here!” Mabel’s father, Ford’s nephew, walks through the foyer and gives his uncle a quick hug. “I see you brought your… friend.” Odyssey smiles awkwardly at her boyfriend’s nephew, who is more than a decade older than her.

“Nice to meet you…” She extends a hand for him. He curtly shakes it and proceeds to act like she isn’t there. Mabel kicks her dad in the shin.

“Dad, be nice,” she says through gritted teeth.

“I am being nice. Why don’t you take your great uncle’s friend to their room while I catch up with him.” Mabel rolls her eyes.

“His girlfriend , dad. She’s his girlfriend .” Mabel grabs Ford’s suitcase from him. “Follow me, Odyssey.” Mabel brings Odyssey to an upstairs bedroom. There are two blow up mattresses on the floor, along with an actual bed. “It’s a good thing you’re with Ford. It means you get an actual bed.”

“My boy is that much of a VIP, huh?”

“No, it’s because he’s old. All the older guests get actual beds,” she explains.

“Hah! Don’t tell him you said that. He’s already a little embarrassed to be dating someone so much younger.” Odyssey lines the suitcases up to the side of the bed. Sharing the room with several strangers is one of the top things she was dreading about this trip, but she’ll suck it up for Ford. She’s taking the side of the bed against the wall, though. “Now, onto the most pressing issue; where is the bathroom?”

“Down the hall and to the left,” Mabel instructs. “Hey, if anyone says anything all dumb and judgemental to you and my great uncle, just find me. I’ll give them a piece of my mind.”

“I’ll do that. Thanks, Mabel. You’re a real one.” Odyssey and Mabel fistbump.

“You know it, dawg.” Mabel goes back downstairs to socialize while Odyssey uses the bathroom. The relief she feels in there is intense, not just because she’s needed to pee for an hour, but because this is the only room where she’s alone. She’s only met Mabel and Ford’s nephew so far, and she’s already worn out. If Mabel’s dad is a sign of things to come, she’s in for a very long vacation. At least with this many people around, no one will notice if she sneaks out to the car with her laptop a few times a day. She can lounge in the backseat and write up a short horror story about a family gathering when she needs a moment away.

When exiting the bathroom, her head kept down, she collides with another woman. “Crap! Sorry!” She apologizes. She looks up at the woman, who shares some features with Mabel, but not with Ford. “You, uh, must be Dipper and Mabel’s mom.”

“And you must be uncle Ford’s… friend…” She says with a sneer.

“His girlfriend, yeah,” she corrects. “I’m Odyssey.” She extends a hand. Mabel's mother shakes it in the same manner as her husband did. She knew the adults wouldn’t like her.

“Right, nice to meet you. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” Mabel’s mother goes into the bathroom, freeing Odyssey. Now she needs to find Ford and not leave his side all night. People might at least pretend to not be disgusted by her if he’s around. 

Downstairs, she finds her boyfriend talking with his nephew and great-nephew, who is the only person she’s excited to see other than Mabel. Dipper looks at his great uncle with an adorable adoration in his eyes. From what she’s heard, Dipper has always idolized Ford. Ford has confided in her that he feels guilty for not being able to see Dipper more, having rejected several invitations to family functions, as well as limiting visitation from Dipper and Mabel. He’s a busy man, sometimes not even having time for his own girlfriend, so it’s to be expected. That doesn’t mean he can’t feel bad about it.

“Odyssey! Hey!” Dipper walks up to Odyssey and gives her the first proper handshake she’s gotten tonight.

“‘Sup, Dipper!” She gives him a friendly smack on the arm. 

“Honey, Dipper was just asking me about my recent research on banshees. Odyssey is the one that edited the article you read.” She walks over to her boyfriend and wraps an arm around his waist.

“Reading that thing nigh on gave me a heart attack. Do you know what your crazy uncle had to do to get those banshee tonsils?” Odyssey asks Dipper. Dipper grins widely.

“What did he do? Tell me!” Dipper’s father clears his throat.

“I hope this story is appropriate for kids, Uncle Ford.” Dipper frowns at his dad’s killjoy attitude.

“Come on, dad, I know that his work is a little dangerous. Let me at least hear the story since he won’t let me go on expeditions with him anyway,” Dipper rants.

“It’s for your own good, my boy. I won’t even bring Odyssey out on most research trips, and she’s a grown woman,” Ford tells Dipper. Dipper’s father scoffs.

“Is she, though?” He says under his breath.

“Dad!” Dipper chastises his father for being rude.

“You know what, babe, why don’t we go get some food?” Odyssey drags Ford to the kitchen, gripping his side. She pours glasses of wine for her and her boyfriend and guzzles it down. Ford rubs her shoulder. “Jesus fucking Christ…”

“I’m sorry, dear. I wasn’t expecting him to be that bad.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine.” She rubs her temples. “I just needed to get out of there before I started getting mean in front of his kid.” Ford plants a kiss on her jaw. A few other people in the kitchen gawk at them. She takes another glass of wine and pops a piece of cheese in her mouth.

“You have exceptional judgment, my dear. You would have absolutely humiliated him if you ‘got mean’ with him.” Ford chuckles in her ear.

“It would’ve been a bloodbath. Why don’t I just… stay in our room before I do something rash? I’m sure your nephew won’t be the only one who has something to say to me.”

“I don’t want to be away from you. Let’s just grab a plate of brownies and sneak off somewhere until someone notices,” He suggests. She shakes her head.

“You should be spending time with your family. Mabel wouldn’t be happy if you hid away all night.”

“She wouldn’t want you hiding away, either.”

“She’d prefer it to me giving someone a verbal beatdown in the middle of her party. Go, socialize for a change. I’ll abscond with this bottle of wine and calm myself down enough that I might be able to play it nice tomorrow.” She gives him a quick peck on the lips and makes her way through the crowd. Ford sighs as he watches his girlfriend leave him to fend for himself tonight. Now it’s his sole responsibility to defend his relationship. Odyssey is certainly right that she can’t be unleashed when she’s mad. He’s still traumatized from the time he watched her dismantle the matriarch of the Northwest family for implying Ford was a cradle robber.

No one notices Odyssey’s absence, other than Ford and Dipper. Dipper is pretty understanding of Odyssey’s need for isolation. He would much rather be playing video games in his room than be passed around from distant family member to distant family member. He wanders into her room a couple of times with some snacks and some questions about the previously discussed banshee research.

“He should’ve been bed bound for a week after that, but the maniac refused to stay put for more than three days. He would’ve been back at work the day after if I hadn’t forced him back into bed.”

“I wish he’d let me come to help. I could’ve distracted the banshee before it hit him.” Dipper puffs out his chest. 

“I’m sure you would,” Odyssey giggles. “Don’t tell your parents I told you this, alright?”

“Yeah. Sorry they’re being such dicks to you. Don’t tell them I said dicks.”

“Our little secret,” she promises.

“Dipper! Come help me with the music!” Mabel shouts from the bottom of the stairs.

“Ugh, I gotta go before I blow both of our covers.” Dipper runs off, waving to Odyssey. At least she has a couple allies here. She sits back and relaxes until people start turning in.

“Baby, remind me I hid the empty wine bottle under the bed,” Odyssey whispers to Ford as he gets into bed. “I don’t need them thinking I have a drinking problem on top of everything else.

“Of course, dear.” Ford wraps his arm around Odyssey from behind and nuzzles his head into her back. They lie awake in bed, occasionally sneaking quick kisses, both stressing about the coming days. She could get away with hiding for one night, but she’s going to be expected to participate in the daytime events. One of the men staying in the same room starts snoring violently.

“Oh my god, that’s so bad,” Odyssey quietly cringes.

“It puts mine to shame.”

“Your snoring is cute. His is ear shattering. What the hell? How do you not wake yourself up with that?”

“Do you want to… sneak out to the car for a little while?” Ford asks, tracing circles in Odyssey’s skin.

“God, yes.” They get out from under the blanket and creep through the room, down the stairs, and out the door. No one seems to wake up. Ford unlocks the car as silently as possible, and they both slip into the backseat. Odyssey rubs her man’s upper thigh. “I’ve been wanting to touch you all night.” Ford pulls Odyssey into his lap. They share passionate kisses. Odyssey grinds into Ford’s lap.

“Ohh, my love. I missed you tonight,” Ford moans into her mouth. “All I could think about was joining you in bed.” Odyssey reaches down and tugs the waistband of Ford’s pants down enough for his dick to spring out. She contorts to pull her shorts and panties off. “My Odyssey…” He rubs circles into her clit.

“Yeah, Ford… god, you’re so good, baby.” She lifts herself up to sit on his dick, bringing erotic groans out of both of them. He grips her hips roughly. “Wanna savor the moment, but… not very comfortable in here. Gotta make this quick.” She rocks on his lap. He gives her those sad little whimpers of his that she loves so much.

“Won’t be a problem,” he pants. He erratically massages her clit as she bounces on him. He buries his face in her clothed breasts. “Yes… Odyssey… my—” He lets out a loud groan. “My beautiful Odyssey.” His fingers work faster, bringing her over the edge. She buries her face in his shoulder to muffle her screams as she comes.

“Ford!” She shouts into the fabric of his shirt. The force of her walls clenching around him brings him to his own orgasm. With a heavy grunt, he finishes inside her. They relax all of their muscles and sit in each other’s arms while they come down from their highs. “Tissue, tissue…” She feels around on the ground for the packet of tissues she always leaves there specifically for moments like this. She awkwardly maneuvers off of his dick and cleans up his semen.

“God, I really needed that.” She slips her panties and shorts back on. Ford lies down, resting his head in her lap. She snakes her fingers through his hair.

“So did I. Seeing my family… it’s always stressful.” He sighs heavily into her stomach. “You’re really getting along with Dipper, aren’t you.”

“He’s a great kid. They’re both great.”

“Yeah, they are,” he says quietly. Being around them must remind him of his own twin brother. Ford never spoke much of him. All that Odyssey knows is that he exists and they’re estranged. She never pushed him to reveal more. God knows she doesn’t want to talk about her family either. 

“The rest of your family I could do without. No offense,” she says in an attempt to lighten the mood. His chuckles vibrate through her stomach.

“I mostly stay in contact with them for the kids. I don’t think I saw any of them for years before the twins were born. I’m sure you’ve noticed why.”

“Yeah, I was ready to fight within minutes of meeting them. Still better than my family, though.” They bask in the comfort of each other for a few minutes, Odyssey gently stroking his gray hair and scratching his scalp. “I guess we should go back to bed.” Ford sits up and pulls Odyssey in for a romantic kiss.

“I love you,” he whispers into her mouth.

“I love you, too.” They stumble out of the car on numb legs and try to go back through the front door without alerting anyone.

“Is everything alright?” A female voice startles them both. It’s Dipper and Mabel’s mom, dressed in a pink robe, staring the two of them down. Luckily, Odyssey can lie on her feet.

“One of our roommates was snoring like a jackhammer. We needed to get away from the noise.” It’s a half truth.

“And what were you doing out there?” She scrutinizes Odyssey and Ford with her eyes.

“We just went for a little walk, Betty. I don’t know how we’re expected to sleep in the same room as whoever that is,” Ford says.

“That’s my cousin. I’ll see about changing the sleeping arrangements for tomorrow night.” They can tell she doesn’t believe them. “Do you need anything, or will you be going back to bed?”

“Back to bed. I think I’m tired enough now to sleep through the sound. Goodnight, um, Betty.” She takes Ford’s hand and drags him back to the room. The room hasn’t quieted down at all. “Aaand he’s still going,” she sighs. They crawl back into bed for a night of awful sleep.

[blackbirdi]

The Maze Runner Incorrect Quotes #2

~~~~~~~~~~~

Chuck: I made you this friendship bracelet!

Thomas: Why should I care?

Chuck: You don’t have to wear it…

Thomas: *Snatches it from Chuck’s hand and puts it on his wrist* No, I’m going to wear it forever. Back off.

———————————

Gally: Can we not use the term ‘butthurt’ anymore? We aren’t twelve if you haven’t noticed.

Minho: Would you prefer ‘asstroubled’ more?

Thomas: *Playing along* You seem a little bootybothered by the term ‘butthurt’, Gally.

Newt: Yeah, come on, Gally, no need to throw a tushytantrum about it.

Gally: *Groaning into his hands*.

———————————

Frypan: Carpenters go to boarding school.

Minho: Wow; wood you believe it?

Newt: I saw what you did there!

Thomas: … Tree.

Newt: Thank you for your contribution, Tommy.

———————————

Clint: You don’t have to be so humble about it.

Jeff: But seriously, I’m not that good at it!

Clint: *Pointing to a Glader’s unconscious body* Well you’re the only one who knows CPR and [Glader’s name] is dying soooo…

———————————

Brenda: When I first met you, I did not like you.

Teresa: Uh huh.

Brenda: But you and I had some time together…

Teresa: *Hopeful* Uh huh.

Brenda: It did not get better.

Teresa:

———————————

Newt: I don’t know what to get Gally for Christmas, so I’m asking all of you for help.

Literally every Glader: An attitude adjustment and a punch in the face.

Newt:

Newt: �� Well … you’re not wrong …

——————————

Thomas: Come on, Newt, I wasn’t that drunk last night.

Newt: *Rubbing water on his face* You highlighted my face because you said I was important.

Thomas: *On the verge of tears* Because you are!

———————————

Thomas: Excuse me! I was a superhero for ten whole minutes!

Brenda: And in that time you got kidnapped and we had to come and save you.”

———————————

Thomas: Newt, what do you dislike about me?

Newt: Nothing, Tommy. Your flaws make you perfect!”

Thomas: Thanks, Newt! That’s sweet of you to say.

Thomas: What do you dislike about me, Minho?

Minho: Well for starters you’re dramatic, inconsiderate, arrogant, hold grudges for way too long —

Thomas: Wait, no—

Minho: Sit tight, I’m not even halfway done!

———————————

Chuck: Just because I’m young, doesn’t mean I’m helpless!

Chuck: *Tries opening a jar Frypan asked him to open*

Chuck:

Frypan:

Frypan: … Do you want some help?

Chuck: *Holding back tears* Yes, please.

———————————

Minho: Guess what number I’m thinking of!

Thomas: 420?

Minho: No. and that’s really immature of you to say. Now, can someone else take a guess and please be mature about it?

Brenda: 69?

Minho: Yeah, it was 69.

[jujumin-translates]

[A3!] Event | Devil Maid’s Holiday | Episode 9

Izumi: Hmm… A little more to the right…

Izumi: …Alright, just like that.

Sakuya: Yeah, I think that seems pretty good! Thank you for everything, Director.

Izumi: You don’t have to thank me. This is nothing.

Izumi: (I was a little worried when the client asked if we could do this over the internet, but…)

Izumi: (Thank goodness we had Itaru-san, Chikage-san, and Kazunari-kun to teach us everything we needed to know…!)

Taichi: Director-sensei, we’ve all finished changing and getting our makeup done!

Izumi: Aww…! Everything suits you perfectly, guys!

Izumi: (Wow, they all look even cuter than I thought they would…!)

Citron: We are sooo very cute! This will surely make the client fall in love with us!

Yuki: Watch your legs! You’ve got a lot of them showing, so be careful with the way you walk.

Azami: …Thank God mine’s long.

Homare: Just because your legs aren’t showing doesn’t mean you should be careless. Clothes like these require you to have more etiquette.

Muku: W-What am I going to do? I’m getting so nervous. Will everything really be okay…? What if I get so focused on how I’m walking that I skip one of my lines, or…!

Taichi: You don’t gotta worry, Mucchan! If that happens, we’ll have your back!

Sakuya: …

Yuki: What? Are you nervous too?

Sakuya: N-No. I’m just… happy.

Sakuya: When I heard we were gonna be wearing maid uniforms and saw your really cute rough drafts, I was a little bit worried if things were gonna be okay or not.

Sakuya: I’ve played female roles before, and obviously I wasn’t worried about your costumes, but…

Sakuya: Originally, the client said they wanted women to do this.

Sakuya: What if they wanted us to wear the costumes against our will, or what would we do if they don’t approve…

Sakuya: But I’m not worried about that anymore. When I stood in front of the mirror after having my costume and makeup on, I really felt like we could do this.

Sakuya: I can’t make costumes, or write scripts, or even really direct, but… Because of that, I want to put the thoughts and feelings of the people who can do those things into performances too.

Yuki: …Then we’ll definitely snag this deal.

Sakuya: Yeah, let’s do our best!

Muku: Sakuya-kun! Director-san has one last thing she wants to check…

Sakuya: Ah, I’ll go to her right now!

Yuki: …

Azami: …That’s Sakuya-san for you.

Azami: He’s told me that same thing before too.

Yuki: That’s because he really can’t help but meddle.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Sakuya: …Sorry for the wait, guys! We can get going now.

Homare: Well then, let us begin then, shall we?

Yuki: Alright, let’s show them just how cute we can be.

Troupe Members: Yeah! 

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Cast

Sakuya - Tio

Citron - Eliza

Yuki - Lilu

Muku - Lala

Taichi - Cherie

Azami - Ame

Homare - Celine

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Izumi: (Deep in the forest in the dusk, the castle of the devil king stands quietly towering over the surroundings beyond the thick fog. There, many devil maids serve the devil king.)

Cherie: “After like, FOREVER, it’s finally almost time for Halloween. Ah~ I’m SO excited!”

Lala: “We get a full day off once a year on Halloween night. Hehe, I can’t wait either!”

Cherie: “Hey, so like, what are you planning on doing for Halloween, Lala?”

Lala: “Obviously, I reeaally want to go see an idol concert. I haven’t gotten my ticket yet, though, so I’ve got to make sure to do that.”

Lilu: “It seems like basically all of the idols you follow end up retiring due to controversy for some reason, though, Lala.”

Lala: “Ugh, Lilu! That would never happen to the girls I’m following now!”

Cherie: “Things always go up in flames like that because you’re a devil supporting… Never mind, it’s nothing.”

Cherie: “What about the rest of you? What are you guys thinking of doing?”

Tio: “I don’t really have any plans, so I guess I’ll just clean around the castle or something…”

Lilu: “I’d really like to go shopping. But it’s just so crowded no matter where you go.”

Ame: “I don’t really have anything in mind either. Hm, maybe I’ll just sleep for the whole day.”

Ame: “Ah, or maybe I’ll go down to the human world and mess with some humans.”

Cherie: “Aha, I mean, doing stuff like that IS only possible every once in a while, isn’t it?”

Celine: “What are you all talking about?”

Ame: “Ueh, Head Maid! Were you listening?”

Celine: “Regardless of how much time you’re getting off, that doesn’t mean you get to cut loose.”

Tio: “Exactly!”

Celine: “Tio, you are your own problem.”

Celine: “Recently, the devil world has been reforming the way we work, therefore, you’re not allowed to work overtime or on holidays, yet when it comes to you, you really only know how to work nonstop…”

Tio: “B-But that’s because this is my hobby.”

Celine: “Haah, that wasn’t meant to be a compliment. You have to be sure to get proper rest too.”

Celine: “Very well. If I catch you working on your next day off, I’ll have no choice but to put a spell on you to force you to sleep.”

Cherie: “Wait, Head Maid, you can’t be serious!”

Ame: “Heheh, maybe if the spell is too strong, you’ll end up being put to sleep forever.”

Tio: “Hmm… Well, whatever…”

Lala: “What are you saying, Tio!?”

Celine: “Haah, you’ll really just do whatever you’re ordered to, won’t you… Unbelievable. Anyway, rest when you have time off. Understood?”

Tio: “Fiiine, understood.”

Izumi: (Later, while cleaning up, Tio enters a room in the castle and finds Lilu sewing a maid uniform.)

Tio: “Huh, Lilu? And Eliza-sama! What’s with that dress…?”

Eliza: “Oh, well if it isn’t Tio. Fufu, what do you think? It suits me, doesn’t it?”

Lilu: “Eliza-sama wanted an outfit that’s similar to one mimicking a maid’s, so I made it especially for her.”

Tio: “Wait, but Eliza-sama is the daughter of the devil king…”

Eliza: “It’s fine. I’ve always wanted to try one on.”

Eliza: “I’ve always been envious of the way that everyone seemed so happy and lively while working, and these uniforms are just so cute!”

Eliza: “And Lala once told me secretly that human idols also wear these kinds of clothes.”

Lilu: “...Idols, huh?”

Lilu: “Actually, I wanted to be an idol.”

Tio: “Wait, an idol?”

Lilu: “After listening to Lala talk, I wanted to actually be an idol, not just someone supporting them.”

Eliza: “How wonderful!! Perfect, let’s do that then!”

Lilu: “What!?” 

Eliza: “You have to do the things you want to do! Tio, you and the other maids are invited too! Let’s all become idols together!”

Eliza: “Right, how about we do it this Halloween? You all have off then, right?”

Tio: “I-I’m okay! I don’t think I’d be a good fit for it anyway…”

Eliza: “What are you talking about? Being an idol is a type of job, you know. And because it’s a job, it should be perfect for someone who loves working like you, right, Tio?”

Tio: “...! A type of job…”

Tio: “Oh, okay then! If that’s true, then yeah, it is perfect for me!”

Lilu: “Everyone becoming idols… Yeah, I want to do that!”

Eliza: “Fufu, then it’s decided!”

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] • [ Next Part ⇢ ]

[drewsbuzzcut]

Forever Doesn’t Measure

mat barzal x model!fem!reader

a visceral in doses fic

Part 3 here

warnings: angst, crying, pregnancy, small argument, and I think that’s all

You sit at the island bar, basking in the sweet sounds of Nolan laughing along with Mat. He’s laid out on the rug, the boy playing with cars and using Mat as a racing track. All while AJ is sleeping peacefully in the pack and play. It transports you back to certain moments of happiness, moments you wish you could always live in.

You make eye contact with Mat and it’s like he takes a skinny dip inside your mind, because he gives you a longing smile. You can see it in his eyes that he knows what you’re thinking about.

The peace doesn’t last too long when AJ wakes up in tears; it’s his feeding time. You’re quick to settle on the couch, your baby boy nestled in your arms under a blanket, happily sucking away. It’s your last month of breastfeeding before weaning him off, knowing that he can’t just not visit with Mat during his allotted time.

You focus on Angel’s blond hair and soft cheeks, distracting yourself from thinking about how you were once a married mom, but now a single one.

Mat’s body sitting beside you on the couch makes you look away from the baby. He peers at you with a softness that you’ve almost forgotten.

“Hey, thanks for inviting me. It really means a lot to be here with the boys and you,” he says, knowing that spending the Christmas holiday together is important.

You honestly didn’t want to because almost 2 weeks ago you were tagged in pictures of him and a girl together, who you assumed was his friend from home. However, the thought of your boys not seeing their father took away all your anger. You didn’t need to ruin their lives even more.

“The boys miss you a lot, and it isn’t fair to them for you not to be here.”

“I miss them, too, everyday. I miss being on morning duty. Believe it or not, it’s one of my favorite parts of being a parent,” he admits. You faintly smile, thinking about all the times Mat would come back to bed with either one of his twins or both.

“You still have morning duty,” you point out, your free hands brushing AJ’s hair to avoid reaching out for Mat.

“Yeah, for like every other week. It’s not the same. Especially because you’re not there with me,” your heart hurts at his words.

“Is this your way of saying you miss me?” You tease, desire taking over when your hand reaches out to brush his hair away from his forehead.

“Of course I miss you,” he says simply, holding your hand in his. The way his thumb sweeps over your knuckles is pure bliss.

You tilt your head towards him while letting it rest back against the couch, eyelashes fluttering and eyes glued on him. Your innocent looks breaks him down into mush.

“I miss you, too,” you say, growing shy and looking down to avoid his stare. He only guides your face to his, lips connecting in a blurring passion. You try to lean into him, but with your baby pressed to your chest, it’s kind of hard. Mat does the job, though, scooting close to you to the point you’re practically wrapped in his arms.

Your tongue seeks entrance to his mouth, prodding the seam of his lips to make its way to dance with his tongue. You have the innate need to explore his mouth as you haven’t done so in a while. He feels the same way.

“Daddy! Daddy, look!” Nolan’s shouts make the both of you jump away from each other, in a state of shock at what just happened.

“Wow, little man! That’s so cool,” Mat clears his throat before complimenting Nolan’s favorite toy that he’s showing off.

“Um… I need to burp Angel and put him down for a nap. I’ll be back,” you mutter before scurrying upstairs.

The second you’re gone, Mat notices your phone going off, and without thinking about it, he picks it up to see who messaged you.

Tito: Happy holidays! I’m so glad we finally got to see you and the boys. Angel is perfect. I miss you guys. Hopefully we can have another visit soon.

Mat frowns at the message, not aware that you flew to Vancouver to visit Anthony.

“AJ went to sleep right away. I swear I can just watch him sleep all the time,” you gush, not knowing what you’re walking into.

“You went to Vancouver?” He asks immediately, catching you off guard.

Your mouth opens and closes, truly not knowing what to say.

“Um… yeah. I took the boys to go visit Tito and Emma. It was only for a few days,” you say softly.

“How could you?” Mat asks incredulously.

“What’s the big deal?”

“We were supposed to introduce Angel to them together,” he reminds you of the detail you stupidly ignored.

“Well, we aren’t together anymore, so it shouldn’t matter,” your voice is in a whisper, hoping that Mat will get the hint to not yell.

“It does matter. He’s my best friend, not yours,” he spits out.

You fight the tears willing to slip down your cheeks.

“I’m tired of you saying hurtful things to me! I’m tired of you breaking my heart,” he tells you.

“Breaking your heart? What about the girl you went on a date with? Huh? That friend from home? Yeah, I saw those pictures of you two together,” you inform him.

“It wasn’t a date! She is a friend from home, one that has a girlfriend, but I guess you didn’t see her in those pictures. And what does it matter if I was on a date, we’re not together anymore,” he throws your words in your face.

Your hands gravitate to your stomach out of instinct, holding on to the soon to be last piece of Mat that you’ll ever have. You can feel your heart cracking, knowing that most of this is your fault. You’re the one to blame.

“You’re right. It doesn’t matter. You’re free to date whoever you want. I’m sorry for saying hurtful things to you. I don’t hate you, I hate myself. Excuse me, but I think I’m going to take a nap. I’ll be down in time for dinner, just please watch Nols and keep an ear out for Angel,” you whisper, voice hoarse and ego crumbled.

You drag yourself upstairs, heading to your closet to pull on a large hoodie that you sneakily took from Mat before you moved out. Undressing out of your outfit, you put your hair up in a messy bun, and cuddle into your bed. Sleep takes over your body in less than a second. You hope you have dreams of your family being all together again.

Mat’s upset with himself for making you cry. To keep the picture of you heartbroken out of his mind, he starts completing miscellaneous tasks around the house, something he knows you’d appreciate. He’s lucky to get Nolan down for a nap even if it’s for 20 minutes. He takes a load of laundry upstairs to fold and put away. As he’s putting some of your clothes in your drawer he finds your paperwork confirming your pregnancy. To say he’s shocked is an understatement. A flurry of thoughts rush through his mind, tears starting to cloud his eyes at the secret you’ve been keeping. He’s not upset with you for not telling him, but at the fact that he has been missing out on the journey so far.

He exits your walk-in closet, coming face to face with your sleeping form. No one can stop him as he strides over to what would be your side of the bed- you’re asleep on his side -and lets his body sink next to yours. You’re on your side, facing away from him, so once he settles he nudges your body to turn into his hold. Your face connects with his chest, an arm holding onto him while one of your legs tangles with his. Eventually you end up on top of him, the natural instinct taking over. Besides, his warmth is to die for.

He allows his fingers to card through your mess bun; the urge to comfort you, strong. He watches your features as they are contorted into something resembling peace. You never see it, but Angel and Nolan look like you when you’re asleep. Both boys share that same blissful smile with you when sleep takes over. Mat first noticed it when Nolan was around one year old, and now he sees it all the time.

Light, pounding footsteps alert Mat, Nolan is making his way to the room.

“Mommy?”

“Mommy is sleeping, buddy. What’s up?”

“I hungry!”

“I know. We’ll start dinner in a little bit. Why don’t you lay with me for a bit,” Mat makes enough room for Nolan to cuddle with you both, you ending back on Mat’s side, facing him while your arms are still around him.

His eyes start to sting, thinking about another baby with you. He is so excited. His hand travels to your stomach, alerting you in the process. Your eyes pop open and you stare into his beautiful eyes. You know he knows. It’s as if anything but you touched your stomach, you immediately go into protective mode.

“Another baby, eh?”

“Another baby,” you confirm. He just smiles, eyes closed and lips closed, but the smile is so happy and a little smug.

Your one arm falls to rest around his waist, relishing in the small contact you have with his bare skin from where his shirt rides up.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I couldn’t,” you shake your head fast and repeatedly, swearing away the thoughts of telling him before this moment. “I just couldn’t tell you. We had just broken up, and I was so shocked about the news. I just didn’t want to disappoint you even more. Even Tito said I should wait,” you say rushing through your words.

Mat’s face falls and for a minute you’re confused until you realize why. You told Tito before Mat.

No no no.

“You told Tito before me?” He asks surprised and hurt, immediately getting up and your hand latches into his waist to keep him close to you, but he’s stronger and upset. He rips himself out of your hold, disturbing Nolan in the process.

He stands, pacing a bit, one hand through the hair and the other rubbing at his neck. Those actions stop when he realizes Nolan is watching his every move, so he picks up Nolan as if he’s a protective blanket, constantly playing with his hair and kissing his head.

“Don’t be mad at Tito, please. It was word vomit. I didn’t mean to actually tell him,” you explain.

“But you still did,” Mat finishes, walking downstairs and leaving you alone with more guilt than you can handle.

You stay in bed for no more than 10 minutes, forcing yourself to get up and attend to Angel. Once he’s all changed and settled, you make your way downstairs. The air is tense beyond measure. Mat is prepping the kitchen, but takes over with AJ to let you cook as he isn’t the best.

From the time of cooking and preparing to eating, everything is silent except for the scrapes of the utensils against the plates and chewing.

Mat sits across from you, holding Angel in his lap. He’s so small compared to Mat’s arms. You start to think about just how much time Angel is missing out with him and vice versa. That’s how it’ll most likely be with the new baby, too. You don’t even realize your tears are falling until Mat is seating himself next to you to comfort you. You can only push yourself away from him. You don’t deserve his affection.

“I love you. Don’t push me away,” he whispers in your ear.

You only shake your head in response, and for the rest of dinner, you’re both silent, just watching the boys.

As you and Mat clean up around each other, you ponder how things should go from here. How will it work with you being pregnant? At the sink, you feel his arms cage you in. His tall, strong frame surrounds you. His breath flows out his mouth and down the back of your neck. You ward off the chills that sensation brings you. His head leans down, forehead resting on your shoulder. His hands move to rest on your stomach. It’s at that moment when you break down completely. Your body goes limp as your silent cries take over, but his body flows seamlessly with yours, so he has you in his hold before you hit the ground.

“Don’t do this, Mat,” you say.

“Don’t do what?” His face frowns in confusion, eyes searching desperately for yours for a clue.

“Don’t forgive me or love me just because I’m pregnant. I don’t want you to be with me for the sake of the kids,” you sob out.

“What about wanting to be together for the sake of us? I love you and I will never stop loving you,” he says so sure.

You turn to look at him when you feel droplets hitting your blouse and soaking your skin through the fabric.

“You’re breaking my heart. Please don’t,” he mutters.

“I love you,” you say for the first time in what feels like forever.

“I love you.”

“I want to be with you. Please. I want you. I want our family. I fucked up so badly. I don’t hate you. I love you. I overreacted about the whole nanny situation and I’m a fucking mess, but I need you. I want you,” you practically chant as you break through your stubborn walls.

“You didn’t overreact. I was being an asshole. I’m sorry. I love you. I want you. I want our family,” he says, sealing his lips to yours. It’s a kiss that can bring you back to life. A kiss that only gives you that fleeting emotion. A kiss that only Mat can give you.

“Mommy?” You hear Nolan calling out for you, so you break away from Mat.

He looks at you with a hint of worry, but more loving than anything.

“You ‘kay?” He forces himself between you and Mat, your face held in between his little hands. He looks at you with a look that you’ve only ever see on Mat when he’s making sure everything is good.

“Yes, baby. Mommy is okay. Mommy is happy,” you breathe a sigh of relief, knowing that you aren’t lying anymore. Pulling yourself off the ground with help from Mat and your little man, you bring all your boys into your arms on the couch. You feel like you can finally breathe again.

You and Mat make eye contact once more, fighting and breaking through each other’s walls- even though yours are more of a struggle to get through. You hate the way you treated him over the few months of separation, but there is nothing more healing than love being shared, love being felt, and love being created.

a/n: I’m so sorry this took long, but I hope you all love it! Thank you all for all the love and kind words<3

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