#I have used this to great effect many an occasion

[rainia]

real talk though the best way to deal with mean/manipulative people is to counter with being aggressively kind. To not rise up to the bait, and to be appear obliviously nice and kind. For example, I had an ex-coworker who loved drama and being mean to people behind their backs. And the response that was most infuriating to her was to be like “oh so-and-so? Yes they’re soooo lovely! I just adore working with them 🥰” And it would stop her in her tracks, but more importantly, she couldn’t pass on gossip about me. What could she say, “btw Rainia is always saying nice things 😒.” A losing battle. You’d be surprised how many times this is effective in shutting down bullshit.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

What the fuck is a PBM?

TOMORROW (Sept 24), I'll be speaking IN PERSON at the BOSTON PUBLIC LIBRARY!

Terminal-stage capitalism owes its long senescence to its many defensive mechanisms, and it's only by defeating these that we can put it out of its misery. "The Shield of Boringness" is one of the necrocapitalist's most effective defenses, so it behooves us to attack it head-on.

The Shield of Boringness is Dana Claire's extremely useful term for anything so dull that you simply can't hold any conception of it in your mind for any length of time. In the finance sector, they call this "MEGO," which stands for "My Eyes Glaze Over," a term of art for financial arrangements made so performatively complex that only the most exquisitely melted brain-geniuses can hope to unravel their spaghetti logic. The rest of us are meant to simply heft those thick, dense prospectuses in two hands, shrug, and assume, "a pile of shit this big must have a pony under it."

MEGO and its Shield of Boringness are key to all of terminal-stage capitalism's stupidest scams. Cloaking obvious swindles in a lot of complex language and Byzantine payment schemes can make them seem respectable just long enough for the scammers to relieve you of all your inconvenient cash and assets, though, eventually, you're bound to notice that something is missing.

If you spent the years leading up to the Great Financial Crisis baffled by "CDOs," "synthetic CDOs," "ARMs" and other swindler nonsense, you experienced the Shield of Boringness. If you bet your house and/or your retirement savings on these things, you experienced MEGO. If, after the bubble popped, you finally came to understand that these "exotic financial instruments" were just scams, you experienced Stein's Law ("anything that can't go forever eventually stops"). If today you no longer remember what a CDO is, you are once again experiencing the Shield of Boringness.

As bad as 2008 was, it wasn't even close to the end of terminal stage capitalism. The market has soldiered on, with complex swindles like carbon offset trading, metaverse, cryptocurrency, financialized solar installation, and (of course) AI. In addition to these new swindles, we're still playing the hits, finding new ways to make the worst scams of the 2000s even worse.

That brings me to the American health industry, and the absurdly complex, ridiculously corrupt Pharmacy Benefit Managers (PBMs), a pathology that has only metastasized since 2008.

On at least 20 separate occasions, I have taken it upon myself to figure out how the PBM swindle works, and nevertheless, every time they come up, I have to go back and figure it out again, because PBMs have the most powerful Shield of Boringness out of the whole Monster Manual of terminal-stage capitalism's trash mobs.

PBMs are back in the news because the FTC is now suing the largest of these for their role in ripping off diabetics with sky-high insulin prices. This has kicked off a fresh round of "what the fuck is a PBM, anyway?" explainers of extremely variable quality. Unsurprisingly, the best of these comes from Matt Stoller:

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/monopoly-round-up-lina-khan-pharma

Stoller starts by pointing out that Americans have a proud tradition of getting phucked by pharma companies. As far back as the 1950s, Tennessee Senator Estes Kefauver was holding hearings on the scams that pharma companies were using to ensure that Americans paid more for their pills than virtually anyone else in the world.

But since the 2010s, Americans have found themselves paying eye-popping, sky-high, ridiculous drug prices. Eli Lilly's Humolog insulin sold for $21 in 1999; by 2017, the price was $274 – a 1,200% increase! This isn't your grampa's price gouging!

Where do these absurd prices come from? The story starts in the 2000s, when the GW Bush administration encouraged health insurers to create "high deductible" plans, where patients were expected to pay out of pocket for receiving care, until they hit a multi-thousand-dollar threshold, and then their insurance would kick in. Along with "co-pays" and other junk fees, these deductibles were called "cost sharing," and they were sold as a way to prevent the "abuse" of the health care system.

The economists who crafted terminal-stage capitalism's intellectual rationalizations claimed the reason Americans paid so much more for health care than their socialized-medicine using cousins in the rest of the world had nothing to do with the fact that America treats health as a source of profits, while the rest of the world treats health as a human right.

No, the actual root of America's health industry's problems was the moral defects of Americans. Because insured Americans could just go see the doctor whenever they felt like it, they had no incentive to minimize their use of the system. Any time one of these unhinged hypochondriacs got a little sniffle, they could treat themselves to a doctor's visit, enjoying those waiting-room magazines and the pleasure of arranging a sick day with HR, without bearing any of the true costs:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/27/the-doctrine-of-moral-hazard/

"Cost sharing" was supposed to create "skin in the game" for every insured American, creating a little pain-point that stung you every time you thought about treating yourself to a luxurious doctor's visit. Now, these payments bit hardest on the poorest workers, because if you're making minimum wage, at $10 co-pay hurts a lot more than it does if you're making six figures. What's more, VPs and the C-suite were offered "gold-plated" plans with low/no deductibles or co-pays, because executives understand the value of a dollar in the way that mere working slobs can't ever hope to comprehend. They can be trusted to only use the doctor when it's truly warranted.

So now you have these high-deductible plans creeping into every workplace. Then along comes Obama and the Affordable Care Act, a compromise that maintains health care as a for-profit enterprise (still not a human right!) but seeks to create universal coverage by requiring every American to buy a plan, requiring insurers to offer plans to every American, and uses public money to subsidize the for-profit health industry to glue it together.

Predictably, the cheapest insurance offered on the Obamacare exchanges – and ultimately, by employers – had sky-high deductibles and co-pays. That way, insurers could pocket a fat public subsidy, offer an "insurance" plan that was cheap enough for even the most marginally employed people to afford, but still offer no coverage until their customers had spent thousands of dollars out-of-pocket in a given year.

That's the background: GWB created high-deductible plans, Obama supercharged them. Keep that in your mind as we go through the MEGO procedures of the PBM sector.

Your insurer has a list of drugs they'll cover, called the "formulary." The formulary also specifies how much the insurance company is willing to pay your pharmacist for these drugs. Creating the formulary and paying pharmacies for dispensing drugs is a lot of tedious work, and insurance outsources this to third parties, called – wait for it – Pharmacy Benefits Managers.

The prices in the formulary the PBM prepares for your insurance company are called the "list prices." These are meant to represent the "sticker price" of the drug, what a pharmacist would charge you if you wandered in off the street with no insurance, but somehow in possession of a valid prescription.

But, as Stoller writes, these "list prices" aren't actually ever charged to anyone. The list price is like the "full price" on the pricetags at a discount furniture place where everything is always "on sale" at 50% off – and whose semi-disposable sofas and balsa-wood dining room chairs are never actually sold at full price.

One theoretical advantage of a PBM is that it can get lower prices because it bargains for all the people in a given insurer's plan. If you're the pharma giant Sanofi and you want your Lantus insulin to be available to any of the people who must use OptumRX's formulary, you have to convince OptumRX to include you in that formulary.

OptumRX – like all PBMs – demands "rebates" from pharma companies if they want to be included in the formulary. On its face, this is similar to the practices of, say, NICE – the UK agency that bargains for medicine on behalf of the NHS, which also bargains with pharma companies for access to everyone in the UK and gets very good deals as a result.

But OptumRX doesn't bargain for a lower list price. They bargain for a bigger rebate. That means that the "price" is still very high, but OptumRX ends up paying a tiny fraction of it, thanks to that rebate. In the OptumRX formulary, Lantus insulin lists for $403. But Sanofi, who make Lantus, rebate $339 of that to OptumRX, leaving just $64 for Lantus.

Here's where the scam hits. Your insurer charges you a deductible based on the list price – $404 – not on the $64 that OptumRX actually pays for your insulin. If you're in a high-deductible plan and you haven't met your cap yet, you're going to pay $404 for your insulin, even though the actual price for it is $64.

Now, you'd think that your insurer would put a stop to this. They chose the PBM, the PBM is ripping off their customers, so it's their job to smack the PBM around and make it cut this shit out. So why would the insurers tolerate this nonsense?

Here's why: the PBMs are divisions of the big health insurance companies. Unitedhealth owns OptumRx; Aetna owns Caremark, and Cigna owns Expressscripts. So it's not the PBM that's ripping you off, it's your own insurance company. They're not just making you pay for drugs that you're supposedly covered for – they're pocketing the deductible you pay for those drugs.

Now, there's one more entity with power over the PBM that you'd hope would step in on your behalf: your boss. After all, your employer is the entity that actually chooses the insurer and negotiates with them on your behalf. Your boss is in the driver's seat; you're just along for the ride.

It would be pretty funny if the answer to this was that the health insurance company bought your employer, too, and so your boss, the PBM and the insurer were all the same guy, busily swapping hats, paying for a call center full of tormented drones who each have three phones on their desks: one labeled "insurer"; the second, "PBM" and the final one "HR."

But no, the insurers haven't bought out the company you work for (yet). Rather, they've bought off your boss – they're sharing kickbacks with your employer for all the deductibles and co-pays you're being suckered into paying. There's so much money (your money) sloshing around in the PBM scamoverse that anytime someone might get in the way of you being ripped off, they just get cut in for a share of the loot.

That is how the PBM scam works: they're fronts for health insurers who exploit the existence of high-deductible plans in order to get huge kickbacks from pharma makers, and massive fees from you. They split the loot with your boss, whose payout goes up when you get screwed harder.

But wait, there's more! After all, Big Pharma isn't some kind of easily pushed-around weakling. They're big. Why don't they push back against these massive rebates? Because they can afford to pay bribes and smaller companies making cheaper drugs can't. Whether it's a little biotech upstart with a cheaper molecule, or a generics maker who's producing drugs at a fraction of the list price, they just don't have the giant cash reserves it takes to buy their way into the PBMs' formularies. Doubtless, the Big Pharma companies would prefer to pay smaller kickbacks, but from Big Pharma's perspective, the optimum amount of bribes extracted by a PBM isn't zero – far from it. For Big Pharma, the optimal number is one cent higher than "the maximum amount of bribes that a smaller company can afford."

The purpose of a system is what it does. The PBM system makes sure that Americans only have access to the most expensive drugs, and that they pay the highest possible prices for them, and this enriches both insurance companies and employers, while protecting the Big Pharma cartel from upstarts.

Which is why the FTC is suing the PBMs for price-fixing. As Stoller points out, they're using their powers under Section 5 of the FTC Act here, which allows them to shut down "unfair methods of competition":

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/10/the-courage-to-govern/#whos-in-charge

The case will be adjudicated by an administrative law judge, in a process that's much faster than a federal court case. Once the FTC proves that the PBM scam is illegal when applied to insulin, they'll have a much easier time attacking the scam when it comes to every other drug (the insulin scam has just about run its course, with federally mandated $35 insulin coming online, just as a generation of post-insulin diabetes treatments hit the market).

Obviously the PBMs aren't taking this lying down. Cigna/Expressscripts has actually sued the FTC for libel over the market study it conducted, in which the agency described in pitiless, factual detail how Cigna was ripping us all off. The case is being fought by a low-level Reagan-era monster named Rick Rule, whom Stoller characterizes as a guy who "hangs around in bars and picks up lonely multi-national corporations" (!!).

The libel claim is a nonstarter, but it's still wild. It's like one of those movies where they want to show you how bad the cockroaches are, so there's a bit where the exterminator shows up and the roaches form a chorus line and do a kind of Busby Berkeley number:

https://www.46brooklyn.com/news/2024-09-20-the-carlton-report

So here we are: the FTC has set out to euthanize some rentiers, ridding the world of a layer of useless economic middlemen whose sole reason for existing is to make pharmaceuticals as expensive as possible, by colluding with the pharma cartel, the insurance cartel and your boss. This conspiracy exists in plain sight, hidden by the Shield of Boringness. If I've done my job, you now understand how this MEGO scam works – and if you forget all that ten minutes later (as is likely, given the nature of MEGO), that's OK: just remember that this thing is a giant fucking scam, and if you ever need to refresh yourself on the details, you can always re-read this post.

The paperback edition of The Lost Cause, my nationally bestselling, hopeful solarpunk novel is out this month!

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/09/23/shield-of-boringness/#some-men-rob-you-with-a-fountain-pen

Image: Flying Logos (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Over_$1,000,000_dollars_in_USD_$100_bill_stacks.png

CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

[salmonskinrolltf]

Soulmates 2

[Here's a sequel of sorts to my previous story Soulmates (you don't need to have read it to understand this story). With thanks to @guytransformedforever, @beardobession, @tf-vigilante, @maletransformationlover, @clevertreephilosopher, @scorpionofredsand, and @maletffanatic for providing the photos used as inspiration.]

Hello, my name is Tyler. This is me:

And this is my roommate, Dylan:

Now look, I don’t have a problem with gay people. My cousin is a lesbian. And Dylan is a great roommate. Stays out of my way when we’re not gymming together, but is always down to hang when I need someone to talk to. I just wish he would be less in my face with all his gay shit. Rainbow flags everywhere, blasting Ariana Grande at all hours, constantly bringing new Grindr hookups back to the apartment but giving me side-eye when I ogle women. It’s just… too much for me.

Here’s the thing. I might actually be able to change that. I have this friend Evan, who I’ve wingmanned for on a few occasions over the past year. One night, when we were getting drunk together, he shared his secret with me. He has a magic gift. He clasped my hand and said “tomorrow, you will wake up and have this magic too.” And sure enough, the next day I could feel a tingle coursing through my veins, and I automatically had the knowledge of how to channel it.

Now I have the ability to change somebody’s future. I can’t fiddle with anything that’s innate or has already happened to them. Like, I can’t just make Dylan straight. But I can shape his future decisions or actions, and my magic will make alterations to speed the process along. Like if I made him decide to work out more, he would basically become a muscle beast within the week. Not that I’d do that. I still gotta be the alpha here. I just want to make him a little more… palatable. Someone cool to kick back with all the time, even if he sucks dick. Let’s see... I think I know what will work.

TOMORROW, DYLAN WILL BECOME OBSESSED WITH SPORTS

———————————

Hello, my name is Dylan:

Sports are my LIFE. I never cared about them much growing up, but about a month ago I felt the urge to join my local queer volleyball team and never looked back. It became my everything. It’s been great exercise, but on top of playing volleyball and getting totally jacked off of it, I’ve loved the sense of camaraderie. I love my team. So much so that I even pierced my nipples on a dare when we lost the semifinals. My teammate River also recommended I stop dyeing my hair, and I think the look is really working for me. For some reason, even though it’s only been a month, my hair has grown out significantly since then. Was the red dye stunting its growth or something? Anyway. I also feel like my roommate Tyler and I have really bonded. We’ve been watching baseball games together and I think he appreciates how into it I am. He says he’s excited to bro out while watching football together in the fall.

I love Tyler, but here’s the thing. Maybe I love him too much. I’ve always had this huge crush on him, and no matter how many random Grindr hookups I try to distract myself with, I just can’t stop hoping that one day he’ll give up women for good and decide he loves me. Especially now that we’re spending all this time together, bumping chests when our team wins and shit.

I know us getting together is never going to happen, but I have this… temptation. I was born with a gift. Or maybe I wasn’t. Something my twink friend Paul told me made me think maybe he had something to do with it. Anyway, I have the ability to reshape someone’s past. I change just one thing about their past, and everything about their present just ripples forward to reflect that change. It’s a delicate art. Changing something big can have huge effects that are totally unpredictable. It’s a major temptation to make Tyler gay, but who knows how he’d turn out. Plus, I think that’s just too invasive.

But… Maybe I could change something small about him. Something that would make him less my type, and allow me to move on and focus on finding a boyfriend who would actually be into me. I’m into nice guys. I really love how kind and caring he is. And come on, he’s a FIREFIGHTER. So maybe I can try…

TYLER GREW UP SELFISH AND SPOILED

———————————

What’s up, I’m Tyler.

You dig the jacket? Yeah, I’m still a firefighter, I’m just off duty. But babes dig whatever look I rock, you know what I mean? I get what I want, and what I want is a lot of one night stands. I know how to get ‘em, too. I’m so glad I made the decision to grow this beard out a year ago, it’s opened so many doors for me. And opened a lot of legs.

I’m getting what I want from Dylan, too. Finally, I have a roommate who’s willing to grab brews and watch the game with me. But I think I fucked up when I changed him. Queer volleyball isn’t exactly “sports,” at least not in my book. I thought he’d come out like a linebacker or something! I mean, nipple rings were never part of the plan. The gay guys seem to really go for them, too, so he’s got an even steadier stream of Grindr hookups coming in and out of the place.

On top of that, I’m a little sick of his shit. He’s always giving me lip about stupid stuff like leaving my dishes in the sink or dropping my unwashed uniform on the bathroom floor. He says it’s unsanitary. Like his parade of twinks aren’t dying to sniff that shit anyway. He just doesn’t get it. I think his volleyball teammates are a bad influence too. They’re all so obsessed with aesthetic and anti-hetero rhetoric. I still can’t make him straight, but I can definitely make him less… annoying.

TOMORROW, DYLAN WILL START HANGING OUT WITH MORE STRAIGHT PEOPLE WHO WILL HELP HIM STOP WORRYING ABOUT STUPID SHIT AND BE LESS PRISSY, WELL-GROOMED, AND UPTIGHT

———————————

Yo, I’m Dylan.

Yeah, I cut my hair shorter than the last time you saw me. The upkeep was just getting to be too much, y’know? A couple weeks ago, about the time I dumped that lame-ass volleyball team I was on, I just got bored with shaving every day, too. I invested in a trimmer and now I rock the stubble look, and it’s working for me. I’ve gained a bit of weight since then, and it’s all for the better because I joined my local football league. Having a few extra beers with my new buds afterward just adds to my potential as a linebacker, anyway.

I thought hanging out with more straight people would make me get used to their vibe and kinda inoculate me against Tyler, but I’m still totally obsessed with him. He’s more of a bad boy now, but I’m finding that less unappealing than I used to. Plus, he’s still parading around in his uniform all the time. I can’t help it! I’ve jerked off more times that I can count to his Mr. June photos in the local firefighter calendar.

Whenever I see his mom, she’s constantly going on about how, out of all his Tonka toys growing up, the fire truck was always his favorite. She thinks that’s why he grew up to be a firefighter. Maybe I can change that core memory into something a little more… disreputable. That would definitely make him not my type anymore. I hope.

TYLER’S FAVORITE TOY GROWING UP WAS A TONKA MOTORCYCLE

———————————

Fuckin’ A, man, I’m Tyler.

God, I love my hog. She’s a beaut, ain’t she? My parents wanted me to grow up to be a doctor or a lawyer or a firefighter or some shit, but all I ever wanted to do was ride my hog. Chicks want to ride my hog too, and I let them. As long as they don’t go near my bike! Hahaha, get it? Fuck, I love life. Let me take another drag on this stogie real quick.

Where was I? Oh yeah, my roommate, Dylan. I wish I didn’t have to room with anyone, but my boss at the garage keeps refusing to promote me. I should knock him around one of these days, see if that changes his mind. Anyway, sure, Dylan isn’t so much of a priss anymore. He doesn’t give me shit if I leave my grease-stained clothes on the couch or light up when we’re watching a football game.

But I wanted him to be straight-acting, you know? I tried to train him up as my wingman but he wore a super gay shirt with all these see-through holes to the party, and all the chicks kept their eyes on him the whole time! Fucker. Why can’t he be more like his brother? I’ve seen pictures. That dude is a full on redneck slob, got a Confederate tattoo and everything. I know they had the same backwater-ass trailer trash upbringing, why can’t he be rougher around the edges? You know what… maybe he can!

TOMORROW, DYLAN WILL REALIZE HE WANTS TO EMBRACE HIS WHITE TRASH UPBRINGING

———————————

Hey y’all, I’m Dylan.

Hoo-ee, life has been good lately. I dunno why I resisted my good ol’ boy roots for so long. This goatee really makes me look rugged, dunnit? Also the chest hair. So grabbable. I decided to stop shaving my body, and poof! There it went. A full rug, within like two days I reckon. Like a sign from God. This is how I was always meant to be.

I know I was trying to push away my crush on Tyler by making him not my type, but what’s the fuckin’ point? I need someone who can handle me, and this hot as fuck biker dude I’ve created might be the only one who can handle me at this point. I ride ‘em rough and bareback, just like the horses back home, and weak city dudes just can’t handle it.

Will he be the same if he’s not straight? Maybe not. But as long as he can take my eight inches, I’ll keep him around. I vaguely remember having some sort of compunction about changing him so drastically, but I’m too horny to remember what it was.

Fuck it.

TYLER WAS BORN GAY

———————————

Uh… hi. I’m Tyler. Who are you again?

Sorry, I’m pretty forgetful. Daddy Dylan says I don’t gotta remember shit though, as long as I let him ride me as rough and as long as he likes. He’ll do all the rest for me. He tells me where to go, what to do, who to do. There are so many nice, hot guys who are willing to pay our rent if I turn a few tricks. I love it.

I’ve been like this as long as I can remember. My mom and dad kicked me out when I was 18, in my senior year of high school. I was caught sucking my English teacher’s dick behind the locker rooms. I never went to college after that, but it’s not like I was getting good grades anyway. Sucking Mr. Brentmon’s cock wasn’t for my health, you know. He had a nice juicy one, too. I still dream about it sometimes.

What was I saying? Oh yeah, I took up with this biker gang for a while after getting kicked out. I’ve always had a thing for bikers. But once they got through using my ass, they got bored. It was hard for a while, but now things are oh, so easy. I get all the dick I could ever want. I have a roof over my head, and no job to worry about. All I do is go to the gym and eat and fuck and I never have to think. Dylan said he might take me out muddin’ sometime too. I don’t know what that is, but anything Dylan does is fun. Fuck, I love the way his goatee tickles my skin when he kisses me, so rough, so manly. Way manlier than I’ve ever been. It’s so fucking hot. I love how he takes care of me.

I really have no complaints. I wouldn’t change anything about my life, even if I could remember how…

[httpiastri]

literally any driver: burying head in crook of neck, night kisses and shutting the other up with kisses

lacii my love <3<3 did this with lando, hope that's fine! merry christmas again, and i hope you enjoy this!! 😁

"lando, did i tell you about that time when i first met my friend clara?" the words are flowing out of your mouth like you're spitting bars. your boyfriend doesn't even get a chance to answer your question before you've started talking again. "oh my god, it's a great story. you'll love it. so, i was in a french class when my other friend, sarah-"

lando is smiling subconsciously as you ramble on about your adventures, just as you have ever since he picked you up from the club. his fingers help you slip out of your heels – not that you even seem to understand what's going on, way too focused on speaking – before one of his hands lands on your waist. he takes a deep breath to keep his composure and hold back the laughter threatening to burst from his chest at your continuous gibberish, before he guides you to his bedroom with soft touches. he chuckles quietly at the way you almost take the wrong turn and end up in his kitchen, too engaged in your storytelling to remember the layout of his apartment. he isn't surprised, though, because;

alcohol always makes you blabber.

in most situations, you're not the most talkative, preferring to choose your moments to speak with great care. but when you start to get tipsy, it is like you are the world's greatest extrovert. even after getting just a little alcohol in your system, you talk to anyone with ears, somehow assuming that they're really interested in whatever you're ranting about.

thankfully, if you have your friends around, they usually drag you away by your arm, apologizing to the poor stranger to whom you've over-explained the storyline of your favorite movie.

lando learned about this side effect of your drinking early on in your relationship. on your third date, after sharing a few drinks at a local bar, you wouldn't shut up for half an hour, not giving him a second to interject with anything. he'd been surprised, but mostly confused, until he got your text message the following morning: oh my god, i did it... didn't i?

he'd tried to pretend he didn't know what you meant, wanting to put it all behind you, but you'd persisted. i didn't shut up. i never do when i drink. i'm sorry :(

lando was always one to be quick to forgive and forget, not wanting you to feel too bad. everyone does some questionable things when drunk, and he'd seen tons of people act worse than you did. but after that date, there would be uncountably many more occasions of you not being able to hold back when booze was in the picture. award shows, drinking games at home with friends, podium celebrations. once, he even found you outside a club after a race, sitting on the curb with one of your hands petting a stray dog as your other helped you explain the meaning of life. safe to say, he is used to your habits by now.

so tonight, when he picked you up from your night out with a few of your friends, he wasn't surprised that your mouth didn't shut once during the trip back to his apartment. you were excitedly telling him about the people you'd met and the drinks you'd had, so eager to explain every detail to your boyfriend when you were getting into the car that you forgot about everything around you and he had to lean across the console to put on your seatbelt for you.

most of the time, he finds your habit endearing. but sometimes, like right now, it gets just a little tiresome.

"and then, when jamie came around, she was like, what are you doing?, and i was like, i'm just having some fun!"

you're both sitting on the edge of his bed by now, after lando's helped you change into something more comfortable for the night, your mouth still running like you're one of the gilmore girls. you don't even flinch when his hands reach for your cheeks and he stares intently in your eyes – but he can't do anything other than smile.

lando loves your voice. he loves it when you're whispering something in his ear when you're out with friends, when you're ranting to him about some stupid coworker, and maybe especially when you're moaning and whining his name.

but now, he reckons you've talked enough for today. your vocal cords must be sore, and his ears are about to fall off, so it's time to call it a night – and he only sees one way to shut you up.

mid-sentence, lando leans in, pressing his lips to yours. he swallows the yelp you let out in surprise, one of his hands gliding to the back of your neck to keep you close. it doesn't take long for you to relax into the kiss, your lips moving with his while your hands reach for the neckline of his hoodie.

it's so easy to get lost in kissing lando. when he parts the kiss, you find yourself wanting to seal your lips again, already missing the feeling. your mind is now completely blank; all you can think of is the kiss. the man beside you laughs at your hazy expression, utterly amused by how you're suddenly quiet for more than five seconds (something he's sure hasn't happened yet tonight).

when you slowly open your eyes, the very content look on lando's face makes something click in your mind. he sudden kiss, his big grin...

"was i rambling again?"

the silence that follows gives you your answer, and you throw your head back as you let out a little groan. "hey, don't worry about it."

"i really didn't mean to. you know how it is, it just happens, and i don't really feel it as it happens, you know? it's just, the alcohol, it's not my intention. i actually told sarah today that-"

and for the second time, lando pulls you into him, quieting you down with his own lips. this time, as you (for the most part) understand what he's doing, you can't help but giggle into the kiss. your boyfriend matches your smile, taking your bottom lip between his teeth as a joking warning. he lets it flop back against your teeth as he pulls away to look at you again, but you've already lunged forward, head resting against his shoulder.

"i'm sorry," you start, nuzzling your nose into the crook of his neck. "i really am."

his arms snake around your waist before he leans back against the bed, pulling you down with him and into his side. "don't be," he answers, one of his hands reaching up to the back of your head, stroking your hair. "it's cute. you're cute." you continue hiding in his skin and he makes himself more comfortable in bed, pulling the blanket over you both. "we'll talk more tomorrow, okay?"

he feels you shake your head. "i'm done talking. i've talked enough. you know those tiktok videos where you only have a certain amount of words you're allowed to say every year? that's me. i've run out of words, i used them all today."

"oh yeah, i can tell," lando chuckles, pressing his lips to the top of your head. "close your eyes, baby. tell me about those tiktok videos tomorrow."

"didn't you hear me? i said no more words. i won't talk tomorrow because-"

lando sighs. it's going to be a long night.

[alottiegoingon]

art fair

jackie taylor x fem!reader

summary: jackie taylor is the elementary school's art teacher.

warnings: too much fluff, jackie and reader being adorable, not proofread

you weren't expecting to stay for any longer than five days this time. that was the initial plan and the words you had said to your parents on the phone before you arrived to wiskayok, new jersey.

the second high school was over, you took the first bus to new york and never looked back. okay, never was a strong word. despite the strong feeling you had to free yourself from the place where you had an awful time in high school, sometimes you would come back to visit your family and your sister, in special.

not wanting to miss her growing up, you had to work extra shifts on the bookstore to pay for a decent looking car, capable of going back and forth from new jersey to new york twice in a month.

now, it was an special occasion. for her 8th birthday, you promised her that you would spend the week in your family home and spend time doing fun things. and by fun things, she meant fun things for her.

the first thing you were asked as soon as you put your feet inside was "what did you get me?"

after wishing your sister a happy birthday and watching her open her present, you sink into the couch with drowsy eyes after some good two hours driving, feeling exhausted. you were so tired that you weren't even paying attention to what the small human full of energy was chattering around you.

"what do you think we should do first? we can go roller skating!"

"bug, i hate roller skating. you know that." god, you remember the last time you fell on your face. you wore a purple eyes for weeks.

"...or we could go get me new books! mom promised me you would go out with me." she keeps talking, not paying attention to you. that was going to be a very long week.

the very next day, you could barely open your eyes when your sister forced you to wake up early and drive her to school, affirming that it was part of the birthday package you promised her even though you didn't actually recall that

[🎨]

you had the brilliant idea to go straight home after dropping the kid at school and sleep for the rest of the day. or until she got home with quick loud steps and a vibrant high-pitched voice.

your great idea fell apart when you were effectively blackmailed by a tiny human dragging you to her classroom, excited to show you everything. you weren’t even sure if you were allowed in there but you followed her anyway.

"that's cool, bug! you did that?" you encouraged her regardless of the many screams of the other kids hurting your ears, right after seeing the paint strokes in a small canvas forming the figure of a person. for a eight year old, the kid had some actual talent. it was better than what you could do.

she nods, extremely proud of herself. "ms. taylor is teaching us how to paint for next week's art fair. you’re coming, right?"

five days. five days was all you could do. it was a pain in the ass to convince your boss to let you skip work for a week and you only managed to do it cause she was a friend of the family. more than that and you would turn into a jobless woman.

“i’ll see what i can do, alright?” you get on your knees to match her height. “now i’m gonna go home and later we can watch…” your voice trails off when your attention is stolen by a woman entering the classroom.

wearing baggy and colorful clothes with glasses that made her look even more attractive, she had a few books threatening to fall from her hands and loose paper sheets. nothing like the old women you used to have for a teacher when you were young.

“good morning, party people! sorry i’m late today.” she doesn’t seem to notice you, too busy and overwhelmed while organizing her desk. she was probably used to be surrounded by loud gremlins all the time, you thought.

she was about to say something but her lips closed after not even a second, knitted brows and an uncertain but polite grin painted on her face. “oh, and i think we have a visitor today.”

and your world fully stops when she looks at you. flushed cheeks as you were practically drooling.

“that’s my sister, she's visiting for my birthday!” the little one fills the awkward silence, not looking like she cares about your unexpected loss of words.

“aw, this is so sweet.” she frowns for a second and all of sudden, her eyes are on you “and are you having a good time down there?” she chuckles, causing your heart to skip a beat, and only then you notice your knees hurting. you were still on the floor, looking like a full time idiot. you hear the other kids the room laughing as well.

“yeah, i was just… tying her shoes.” you stand on your feet as quickly as possible, nearly losing balance.

“no, you weren’t. my shoes don’t have-.” your hand flies over your sister direction to cover her mouth.

your legs were feeling like thin sticks as you walked towards the light haired woman, extending your hand to her. “hi, sorry.” you said falteringly.

“it’s all good. i like to stay on the floor sometimes too.” she offers you an empathetic smile. “i’m jackie.” she finally shakes your hand.

“jackie.” you echo her, subtly shaking your head. it felt like you were absorbing her name into your soul. even her name sounded like something that could be in a movie. “hi. i’m-“

“i know. your sister talks a lot about you. but i guess i wasn’t expecting you to be like this.” you freeze again.

“like what?" your voice trembles as you ask.

she didn’t say anything but you feel her eyes wandering around you while she smiles.

jackie gave you an excuse, apologizing for interrupting the conversation but emphasizing how she desperately needed to start the class. she was already late and you felt bad for taking so much of her time.

“it was nice to finally meet you.” is all she says and you made sure to say it back. before walking through the door, you quickly wave at your sister, not wanting to disrupt them anymore.

you immediately gave up on the idea of sleeping for the entire day. how could you when you had just met jackie taylor?

overthinking everything was like a piece of cake for you, as easy as blinking. but it wasn't hard to overthink things when jackie's first impression of you was probably a terrible one, knees on the floor and making a fool of yourself.

you were happy to welcome your sister back home from school, disregarding the fact that she told your parents that you were drooling over her art teacher on your damn knees. how can kids remember so much?

wanting to know more about her very interesting teacher, with ice cream for dinner, you succeeded in finding out that jackie taylor wasn't a married woman.

"why do you wanna know that?" you struggle to understand the few mumbles thanks to her stuffing her mouth with ice cream.

"okay, i think you had enough." you whisper, slowly moving the bowl away and ignoring her question.

[🎨]

for the next two days, between a bookstore visit or going out for ice cream, you would give jackie taylor a thought. not because you cared or was interested, of course, you were just curious. and you wanted to fix the impression you made on her.

"are you driving me today?" was the question you were asked every morning.

too tired, too sleepy, too early, bad headache, terrible cramps. were all the excuses you gave her so you could have a few more hours of sleep. until the third day.

"school is starting soon!"

"hmm, i don't know if i'm taking you... i'm feeling so-"

"ms. taylor's class is the first one today." you notice her playful tone. she knew you too well.

"good. i'm actually feeling so good today." fast as the wind, you shoot out of the bed.

"you don't have to walk me there anymore. i'm not a baby." the eight year old complains as she notices you following her inside.

"sure, i know. i just wanna make sure you're safe." that wasn't a full lie. yes, you were looking forward to talk to jackie again, but you still cared about your sister.

[🎨]

you were fifteen minutes earlier that the actual class time and by the time you walk into the room, jackie was already there. with your sister going straight to talk to her friends, that was your chance.

"good morning." you timidly knock on the halfway open door, not wanting to scare her.

"hello there!" jackie closes the book that was laying on her big desk in front of her, fixing her gaze on you. lips curving upward. "not tying any shoes this morning?" standing up, she adjusts her slightly crooked glasses as she watches you get closer.

"not today, no. too hard to find any customers." you join her tease, feeling like you have been blessed as she laughs.

"you should try the art exhibition next week. lots of shoes to tie in there." you caught yourself thinking that she may be flirting with you but maybe you were just going crazy for drinking so much coffee lately.

"i would love to tie some stranger's shoes on a school event." playing along, all you could think was that you urgently had to stay for more than just five days. time to beg your boss twice.

"nice! i'll see you there, then." about to end the conversation, jackie's smile widens and the simple act almost makes you fall on your knees again.

"actually..." you fight to not stumble over your words as you create the fastest excuse ever to see her again. "my sister and i are going out for roller skating tomorrow. you should join us."

jackie's gaze lifts back at you, eyebrows raising in curiosity.

"why should i?" she had the casual smirk adorning her face, probably enjoying this entire situation much more than you.

"because... we're going to a park nearby and there's a few tables in there. what's greater to an art teacher than a pretty view to paint?" you were quite proud of how quick your mind worked.

jackie seems to take a brief moment to think about your words, even though she had already made her mind minutes ago.

"it's a deal."

"what? you hate skating. remember when you had a purple eye? that was funny." you turn around to find your sister standing by the door, giggling at the memory of your swollen face. jesus, for how long she was in there?

[🎨]

you met jackie at the park after spending the entire day double-checking your helmet and all of your safety equipment. you couldn't afford to fall again. not this time.

with a huge bag and many art supplies, jackie carefully placed everything on the picnic table while being squeezed in a hug by your sister. the first thing you noticed was how jackie dressed the exact same way out of school. free of any boring clothes and with no glasses this once.

"you actually came." you shyly mirror her grin.

"of course i did. i need to paint something for the fair and i thought that the good old blue sky and pretty trees would do the job."

"so an empty canvas is what made you come?" nervously, your eyes dart back and forth at the brushes on the pine table and her eyes.

"not just that. i think the companny is pretty rad too."

after feeding the ducks with your sibling, you joined jackie by sitting in front of her. she appeared to be so relaxed even when being so gentle and cautious with the paint. you couldn't help but feeling at ease as well.

"found something worthy of being painted by you?"

jackie looks at you over the canvas with rosy cheeks and a contented smirk, affirming with her head. "i think i did."

"it's nice of you to stay longer." her narrowed focused eyes are back on her work, sometimes meeting yours.

you didn't remember telling jackie that it wasn't on your initial plan to stay that long and as if she was capable of reading minds, she snorts before explaining herself.

"she told me you wouldn't be here for the art exhibition." her head points at your sister, skating around the small lake.

"she really does talk a lot about me." you joke, referring to what jackie said when you first met her.

"why did you?" eyes locked on the piece of work, jackie tries to sound unbothered.

"stay longer?" she agrees silently.

"i figured that i really like art. and i couldn't miss such an important event for her."

"so your love for art was what made you stay?" jackie questioned and, once or twice, you would catch her more concerned glance at you.

"not just that. i think the art teacher is pretty rad too."

in the middle of longing stares and jackie blushing for the first time, you hear a childish voice calling you.

"aren't you coming? you're so boring!"

snapping out of the jackie taylor effect, you realized that you still haven't fulfilled your promise to skating with your sister.

jackie, not worried about the painting anymore, quickly put on her rollers with a huge beaming expression. without a single effort to stay still on those things, you became aware of how experienced she was.

"come on, i'll help you out." standing in front of you, she offers you a hand and you don't wait much to accept it.

[🎨]

you were a nervous wreck when the big day came and it wasn't even your works that were going to be exposed to people. in honor of jackie, you tried to wear something formal like a nice looking suit and elegant shoes. a bit too much for a simple school event but it was much more than that to you.

at school, you were surrounded by an impressive quantity of paintings already framed on walls. some of them were adorable, made by younger students.

being pulled by your sleeves, you spend a few minutes in the area where your sibling's works were hanging in and seeing her so happy made you pleased to your decision to stay.

with a single poppy in hands, you find jackie talking to someone, probably a parent. at the exact moment your eyes met, she quickly excuse herself from the conversation to walk towards you with energetic steps.

"all of this looks amazing. you look amazing." is all you can say, not caring about the ear to ear grin on your lips.

"hi! you look great too. i like the suit. so fancy." her hand tenderly brushes over your shoulder, feeling the soft fabric of your clothes.

"it's a special occasion, right? and, here, i got you something."

jackie's face radiates happiness at the second she sees her favorite flower being handled to her, eyes sparkling at you.

"thank you! how did you know i like them?" she tucks the flower into her hair, prettier than ever.

"you know, she talks a lot." you two share a laugh. "aren't you gonna show me your work?"

as her silky hands covered your eyes from behind you, she guides you to the wall with all of her artworks.

"you ready?" your nod in response and she let go of your eyes.

as soon as you open them, one specific framed canvas catches your attention. it was jackie's first view from when she was sitting at the picnic table the other day. you and your sister feeding the ducks on the lake, with the exact same clothes you were wearing. there was no doubt.

"jackie..." you gasp, stunned, jaw almost hitting the floor.

"you like it? i thought it would be something worthy to paint." she's nervous. you can hear her shaky voice as she speaks.

instead of saying something, you spin around to face jackie behind you. with trembling hands, you trace her jawline before pulling her in for a kiss.

you were a big fan of art now.

[rubberbutton]

So, I have this wacky Javert & Cosette detective agency AU idea that I’ll probably never write…

Post-Seine Javert starts a private detective agency — reuniting loved ones, shutting down extortion rackets, stopping forced marriages, things like that. He doesn’t make any money because he fails to collect payment on the rare occasion he’s not working pro bono. [Very Angel Investigations, sans vampires … unless?] The work is both penance and its own reward.

Bored of social calls and society dinners, Cosette decides to help him in his work. Javert refuses her, but she keeps showing up. She proves herself useful, as no one ever suspects her of being a double agent, she’s clever, and she can cry on command — which is an incredibly effective distraction. Since Paris’s underworld is already familiar with him from his previous profession, Javert has had difficulty making progress on some of his cases. But Cosette is entirely unknown. Grudgingly, he allows her to help on his smallest, safest, most respectable cases. Which rapidly escalates into her running the place. He’s really not an ideas man.

There are capers! Escapades! Daring rescues! A heart-warming Christmas episode!

Valjean and Marius are given to believe that Cosette’s time is spent volunteering with ladies aid societies. When the truth comes out, Valjean is apoplectic, and it’s the first real risk to his relationship with Javert (well, post Seine, haha), especially when Javert makes it Cosette’s choice whether to continue. Marius’s anger burns out much quicker; that boy is nothing if not easily led.

Meanwhile, Montparnasse has filled the leadership vacuum left by Thénardier and has made great inroads in the Parisian organized crime scene. With Javert foiling many of his more lucrative business interests, Montparnasse decides it’s time to deal with with him more permanently...

Other odds and ends for this ‘verse:

Javert accidentally adopts some urchins when he attempts to cultivate them as informants, but they keep showing up like stray cats when they realize he’ll feed them. 

Having heard it in her tenderest years, Cosette quickly picks up the accent and argot of the street and becomes a mistress of disguise.

She also purchases an umbrella with a stiletto hidden in the handle, which she mostly uses to underline her better rhetorical flourishes.

Whilst Javert is not an easy man to like, Cosette appreciates his honesty. Granted, that honesty is couched in the most pessimistic, condescending and insulting way imaginable. But after her father and her husband gaslighting her for years, it’s a relief to not second guess the information someone gives her. 

They both appreciate having someone to commiserate about Jean Valjean’s idiosyncrasies with. “You know the way he clears his throat when he disapproves, but won’t say he disapproves — and if you ask him if he disapproves, he’ll deny it?” “I know it very well!” 

After Jean Valjean is finished being furious, he moves right on into being jealous. He wanted them to get along, but not quite this well. He of course would rather eat glass than admit it. 

Also, as many of les amis survive as I can reasonably get away with. Definitely Courfeyrac, because I like him. Probably Bahorel, in case they need some additional muscle when working a case. And Joly because they’d need someone with a medical background to identify the cause of death/provide medical aid. Also no one should die with a cold, talk about insult to injury. 

Anyhoo. Everybody lives happily ever after with a gentle ’90s TV glow. Fuck you, Victor-Marie Hugo.

[thus-wrote-mrs-zeppeli]

He’s posing like a dad who fell asleep on the couch so I Had to use it lol I already give up on using nice pics for these

-Various jjba characters x reader: Parenting headcanons-

Content, plz read: Can be interpreted as biological or adopted children, sometimes from a past relationship for reader because otherwise I can’t see some of these guys having kids lol, Not the best parenting techniques sometimes, but I don’t think there’s anything triggering in here (do lemme know if I’m wrong though)

Leone is more of a father figure than an actual father, Established relationships, dating/married depending on the character

I love parenting headcanons, they’re really fun to write

Characters: Rohan Kishibe, Bruno Bucciarati, Leone Abbacchio, Gyro Zeppeli

-Rohan Kishibe: You have to wonder if Rohan would Ever be mature enough to be a father-

Like you expected, it’s an ADJUSTMENT for the manga artist.

It’s not that he dislikes his own kid, in fact he has quite a bit of pride in his progeny, but he’s not the best at interacting with even teenagers and adults, so his kid is especially subject to his difficult social skills. But growing up around Rohan means his kid is used to it.

Rohan is super stubborn and struggles to express more sentimental emotions, but you wonder why he gets so shy about saying especially sweet things to even his own family sometimes. Just something about the vulnerability of it makes him uncomfortable. That’s your best guess, at least.

He is a well-intentioned father. He wants to teach his kid curiosity, that there is always more to learn; and he takes a great deal of pride (and is super smug about it with you) when your kid expresses interest in becoming a manga artist like him.

Rohan teaching his kid that little stretch he does, and they do it together-

It’s so cute-

Though you do have to step in on occasion and prevent Rohan from teaching your kid Every ‘artistic technique’ of his…please Rohan…do NOT teach your kid to lick dead bugs…you can’t believe you actually have to step in sometimes and prevent Rohan from instilling some bad or inconsiderate habits…but then again…you’re married to Rohan Kishibe, and you of all people are aware of what he’s like.

Rohan’s kid often has to deal with people trying to get close to them because of who their dad is. It’s a bit frustrating, and they might get a little unjustly irritated at Rohan for being famous, but they accept that it’s not really Rohan’s fault. They know their dad has no interest in the fame aspect of his art, it’s just a side effect of being a brilliant author.

Rohan and his kid are pretty similar, despite how little they care to admit it, and even their fashion sense is pretty reminiscent of each other. Often times you’ll even hear something like: “Dad…is that my scarf?” or Rohan’s incredulous little: “Hey, hey, hey, wait just a moment, those are MY earrings.”

You wonder if you should interfere in their little arguments, but 99% of the time nothing happens and they move on immediately. 1% of the time and they’re genuinely giving each other the cold shoulder or being passive aggressive and petty for the rest of the day.

Parenting technique wise, Rohan is not so interested in tradition. He’s not really strict or especially firm with any rules, because frankly, it is more convenient to enforce curfews and rules with Heaven’s Door, but you really don’t like when he uses it, so at Most it’s used Sparingly. He’s pretty lax when it comes to his kid’s mannerisms and behavior, but he Does expect a certain measure of respect from his kid, for both of you since you’re the parents.

As for how many kids he’d have, probably none, honestly-

But if he was going to have kids, just one is enough for him. He really doesn’t have the disposition for parenting, one is plenty, but the experience was very valuable to him, and he is proud of the person his kid becomes, even though he’s still not the best at expressing that affection. He does somewhat understand the importance of verbalizing his love for his child, and when he does try to, it comes across a bit awkward and forced but…hearing their dad try to tell them how much he actually cares about them is one of their fonder memories of him.

Rohan’s kid recognizes they had a bit of an unusual childhood due to their eccentric father, who was also often away on solo trips. But the stories their father would tell or put on paper, the ones dedicated just to his family…Those ones are very precious to his kid, and even though Rohan’s kid doesn’t visit that often once they moved out, it works out well enough for the two of them. Rohan usually doesn’t speak too much about your kid but sometimes he mentions how he wishes they’d visit or send a text; a comment of a concerned parent disguised as a complaint, very much like Rohan.

-Bruno Bucciarati: Firm believer in 2 kids for Bruno Bucciarati. A man who could see himself raising children of his own. But. Someday, in the distant future. He has the self-control and foresight to know he cannot take on such a heavy responsibility in his current position. If the two of you wish for children, it will have to be after he’s able to leave the mafia lifestyle far behind him. He cannot bring himself to put his family at risk by staying involved in that sort of thing.

As much as he wants to raise children with you, he knows it’s better to wait til the moment is absolutely right. I could see him having children when he’s well into his thirties, once he’s certain the two of you have the means to give your kids what they need to thrive and his past in the mafia has no chance of catching up to him.

He’s such a loving father, motivated so much by the love he feels for his children, and his desire to give them a happier childhood than he had. On the slightly stricter side, but he is very fair, and will always make an effort to understand where they’re coming from even if he still believes they need correction.

Hearing “we need to talk” from Bruno has some GRAVITY to it, especially with that intense tone he uses when he needs to command respect. He doesn’t usually get upset enough to really raise his voice at his children unless they get themselves in serious danger, and even then the raised voice comes from a place of concern and not genuine anger, but a “I am VERY disappointed in you,” from him with his strict tone has much more weight to it than any amount of superficial yelling he could do. Because usually it means he’s going to be vulnerable with them for a moment, tell them how their actions scared him or disappointed him or angered him…and Bruno is a compassionate but guarded man, even with his own family, so hearing him talk about how he feels immediately turn a conversation with his kid very serious.

He knows communication is something he struggles with, no matter how good his intentions are, so when he does decide to be completely honest and express his emotions, he always reminds them that he acts how he does because he loves them more than anything else in this world. And he’s not just talk either. Growing up with him as their dad, his kids had seen all the ways he protected them and taught them valuable life skills so they could protect and take care of themselves.

He always acts so strong, though you noticed he was trembling a bit the first day of school for his eldest child. He didn’t cry, but he was pretty close to it that day, and he really had to make an effort to distract himself so he didn’t worry too much over them while they were away. He picks them up after school (omg just got hit with a vision of hot dad Bruno turning other parents’ or teachers’ heads while he’s just getting his kid from school lol), and asks them about their day while walking them home.

His children have always appreciated and loved their dad. They know he would always protect them, and save them if they were in danger, and he did his best to put them on the path to become kind people, and have a good education.

His children visit often, probably try to live close to him, too. And he is always delighted when his children decide to visit him and you, they will always have a place in his home and heart, and he considers raising them one of the greatest honors he’s ever had.

-Leone Abbacchio: You had a kid from a past relationship, so you immediately assumed a man like Leone wouldn’t be interested in getting serious with you. The idea really cemented in your mind when he started a casual relationship with you, and established immediately he: “wasn’t gonna play Daddy,” to your brat, no matter WHAT. He was just your on again off again pseudo-boyfriend who would come and go as he pleased, and he preferred it that way.

Cue you begging him just ONE time to babysit for you…your sitter had canceled last minute and he was the only other person you could turn to that you actually trusted with your kid.

He literally looks at you like >:|

You simultaneously can and cannot believe he groans at you and rolls his eyes. But he can’t just watch you beg for help when he knows he (maybe) could handle watching your kid for a few hours. His innate sense of justice makes him feel obligated to agree. But he’ll complain about it afterwards when you’re not running yourself ragged from stress.

He’s not the best with children, because he has no patience. Literally as soon as your kid starts complaining about being hungry or bored he already gets frustrated. He makes an active effort not to speak too harshly but he’s so used to saying and doing whatever he wanted now that he might’ve lost his composure a few times.

When you get home, your kid gestures at you to be quiet, before pointing at the couch. You follow their gaze and see that your damn replacement babysitter had fallen asleep.

“Did you grab him that blanket?” you ask your kid with a slightly disappointed but not surprised look at Leone. Your kid nods, and reports he fell asleep just a few minutes before you got home so it’s fine.

According to your kid’s report, Mr. Abbacchio is a bit scary and loud sometimes but overall was an ok babysitter.

Well…that’s about the best you could’ve hoped for-

But the next day Leone receives an angry call from you asking who taught your kid such atrocious Italian curse words.

It takes a while but…the deeper your relationship with Leone gets, the more he warms up to your kid too.

Eventually it even gets to where he’ll ask: “how’re you holding up, kiddo?”and ruffling their hair when he visits, or bringing a small toy as a gift for them (though he’ll deny going out of his way to get it, always saying he just Happened to come across it or it was on sale or something).

He’ll try to keep his distance though. He doesn’t want your kid even getting the Idea of looking up to a bad man like him. You tell him he shouldn’t worry about things like that, but then he asks you if you really want your kid growing up thinking being a gangster was a great idea.

You don’t respond, because you both know the answer.

-Gyro Zeppeli: (the dad jokes are SO BAD please free his children) The way he was raised and his observance of his dad definitely influences his parenting style. There are a few differences, but his deep respect for his father reflects in his own parenting, even when he didn’t agree with him all the time.

For example, he does not raise his voice to scold his children; it’s not something he’s ever even considered because he doesn’t need to. His tone and his words are enough to get his message across. He’s an affectionate and playful father in his own way, but when he is being serious his kids absolutely know and will smarten up. No feeling worse than when Papà was upset at them, not because he was scary or anything like that when he had to correct them, but because seeing him disappointed in them makes them feel so bad. He seems genuinely sad when they do something seriously wrong, and when he’s really, Really upset he’ll get quieter and more reserved for the rest of the day and dinner is awkward and silent, but before everyone retires for the night he’ll probably try to have a casual, calmer conversation with whichever kid or kids got in trouble, and usually they’re able to talk it out and it ends with him playfully ruffling their hair and reassuring them he could never stay disappointed with them.

The Zeppeli family history is long, and their traditions are intricate and serious. He follows those deeply ingrained ones, since he has a lot of pride in his family name. His eldest’s real name will only be known by him and you, and they’ll be trained as a doctor and an executioner. And he’ll teach them the spin, of course. But he’ll also instill in them a different genre of justice from what his father taught him: If something feels wrong to you, then act on it.

When it comes to the amount of kids, he imagines himself having quite a few, but he’s not really given it much thought. He grew up in a big family, with four younger siblings. That’s five kids in total. His parents handled it fine, so that must be a reasonable amount, right?

He’s genuinely confused when you take him saying he wanted five kids as another of his bad jokes.

Give him a break, he didn’t know that was a lot! He’s happy to just start with one and see how it goes.

He’s known from a young age that as the eldest he’d be carrying on the real legacy of the Zeppelis, so he faces parenting with grace and an impressive amount of acceptance. However, having plans to eventually be a father doesn’t translate into being completely prepared. He’s calmer than you would’ve expected but…you can tell he feels out of his element, despite the brave face he puts on.

He is a stricter, more serious father than you’d initially thought he’d be. But he is fair, and makes sure his kids know they can always come to him, and he’s still fun and playful when he doesn’t have to be firm. His children respect and love him greatly, though inevitably he’ll have a slightly different relationship with his eldest child due to the traditions of the Zeppeli family.

He’s not as good at being as stoic as his father, and he knows that shows when he’s teaching his eldest, but you assure him that showing his emotions to his children has gotta be much healthier for everyone involved than trying to be a completely impassive Executioner.

At the end of the day, compassion wasn’t a weakness, even for the eldest child in each generation of the Zeppeli line.

[jeonsbabygirlsworld]

CHAMPAGNE CONFETTI

SUMMARY: It was supposed to be a perfect night to spend with Jungkook and his mom, though you are nervous Jungkook helps you to calm down but after a few hours the things take a toll on you both .

PAIRINGS: FWB TO LOVERS (rockstar Jungkook x Reader)

WORD COUNT:2.1k

WARNINGS: AGNST, SMUT, FLUFF at the end kind of not really...? also Jungkook rides a bike, has a beef with his brother. Reader slaps Jungkook once .

SMUT WARNINGS: Unprotected sex, Fingering in elevator, oral m,f , missionary, cream pie as always, fingering, so many kisses, squirting, making a sex tape for like 2 minutes?

A/N: oh god 3D jungkook has an effect on me you guys I hope you enjoy this . As always please like, comment, follow and reblog sweet pies. <3

“I don’t know Jungkook are you sure about it?” You ask nervous about the fact he had invited you to his mother's birthday party. 

“I’m sure baby, please come. I'm sure she would love to have you there, also wanna have champagne confetti there?”He said and you just know he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Fine kook I’ll get ready. Can you come and pick me up, also I’m always up for it”You answer him chuckling right away.

“Yeah, baby I’ll be there in a few get ready yeah baby, and great.” Saying goodbye, he hangs up. 

Present

You get ready soon after his call doing a slight makeup, hair styled in wavy curls and wearing a new dress you saved for a special occasion the dress ends right above your knees. 

There was a knock you heard while wearing your black heels. Opening the door, you meet with the site of Jungkook dressed in a suit his hair-sleeked blazer resting in his hands and a few buttons unbuttoned. 

“Hey pretty girl, you ready?” Jungkook whispered while extending his right hand, nodding at him you allow him to guide you to His bike. “Hop on pretty girl,”he says giving you a helmet. Make sure to not ruin your hair. 

“Hold on tight baby,” he says starting his bike, the speed of his bike fastened while you reach the venue safely “Kook I’m nervous what will she think about us,”you say nervously while jungkook walks you into the elevator“Relax she is gonna love you,”he says huffing out a chuckle “I’m just stressed,” you say entering the lift and staying by the railing. 

“Can I do something to make you relax baby?”Jungkook says pressing his body to yours “Jungkook you crazy” you answer not believing him “Come on y/n we’re going 28, you’ve got 25 floors to come” he heaved “fuck go for it, kook” you say his fingers coming up to circle your clit rubbing them in eight shapes and inserting his fingers “cum baby” he said while you whined “oh my god gonna cum” you say slightly griping his blazer not wanting to ruin it. 

“Gonna cum jungkook” you moaned yeah’s leaving your mouth soon cumming on his fingers and removing them he sucks on them “mm came so much” he teases you “Shut up let’s go”You kiss his cheeks. 

While the elevator Dings and opens to the Room directly, holding his hands he guides you to meet his Mom woah she looks amazing you say loudly in your mind “Hi, good evening Mrs. Jeon, Happy Birthday” you say a bit cheerful “Oh hello dear and Thank you so much” she says hugging you both “Son make her comfortable all right?” She stated “Yes Mom don’t worry”Jungkook exclaimed. 

Now both you and jungkook and his mother were sitting on the sofa chatting about the new song he was going to release “Hey Kook let her listen to the song you going to release”you say excitedly “ Yes here you go Mom”he smiled. 

In the middle of the song buzzing he gladly told his mother to dance with him “Oh Mom, I love you” The room was completely filled with laughs and giggles while saw them happily dancing while his mother called you too “Come here honey, join us” she says forwarding her right hand accepting it you both started dancing “oh twirl sweetie “she says while Jungkook stood there looking at both of you with a wide grin. 

“Oh, looks like someone is having a great time over here”Then there came someone whom Jungkook wished never to see. His older brother. While you squeaked a tiny “hi” to him. Jungkook stopped the music looking at his mother “Mom? You said it was going to be only us, didn’t you?” He hounded “I said it because I knew if I told you he was going to come you wouldn’t have come here” she said grabbing his arm “Leave Mom I don’t wanna stay” he said removing her hands, Jungkook eyes his brother “Oh she’s the new one kook? Good taste indeed” his brother laughs “You always bring someone new, you going to push her off too soon? Using her just for her body, right?”He says with a whiskey glass in his hand “Baby get your purse we are leaving” Jungkook warns “Did I get on your nerves, Kook, you had one girl, but it was too boring right? So two girls are cool for you?”  His brother laughed away. 

It happens really quickly Jungkook grabs the glass from which he was drinking and hits him luckily his brother misses it his mother yells “Jungkook are you crazy?” She says raising her voice, never batting an eye he grabs you by your hand while you stand still scared “y/n get it together let’s go” he growls. 

Getting back to your senses you “Jungkook are you fucking stupid? What would have happened if it would have fucking hit your brother?” You bombard him with questions only to receive a low groan “fuck”. 

Jungkook had it even with you asking him questions “Y/n can you shut the fuck up, please?” He says pinning you to the elevator railing and grabbing your cheeks making your lips pout out. “Be quiet, can you? I know what I did” Shutting you up you were scared to see Jungkook like this.

Exiting the elevator you follow Jungkook who is walking at a fast pace “Jungkook wait” you call out “Walk fast y/n we are going back to my place” he says handing you the helmet “Jungkook no, you need to tell me first what the fuck happened up there” you exclaimed, oh boy that was his last straw “fuck y/n can you not stay calm for a fucking second I know what I did and who are you to ask me this stuff you're not my girlfriend and that’s right I keep you for your body , and your acting as if you didn’t knew I have many girls , you anyways will get boring ” he exclaimed, hearing this made your blood boil you slap him across his face and leaving from there. 

Tears run from your eyes, and you call for a taxi you go home crying, you and Jungkook were fuck buddies but staying with him didn’t feel like you were just using your bodies, you went on dates, play dates with bam, showering together, hell you both have gotten so close to each other he has a fucking tattoo of your initials( “or maybe it was just an illusion, and it's just the initial letter of all his fucks”) on his Adonis belt and the aftercare made you more than just fuck buddies.

Reaching home, you unlock the door and collapse on your knees you cry loudly when you hear a continuous ring of the bell and a loud banging noise. “Open the door baby I know you in there, I’m sorry baby, and I know I messed up listen to me, will you?” Jungkook banged harder and pushed open the door finally, instantly getting on his knees hugging you.

“Baby I’m sorry I didn’t mean that at all baby” Jungkook said kissing your forehead you cried harder in his arms “That really hurt Jungkook, you saying you use me just for your pleasure hurt me like shit I know that’s the point of our deal but still” you speak in between the sobs. “I know baby I’m sorry I really didn’t mean it, you can yell at me, curse me, just don’t leave me” he says his face levelling yours while you slightly chuckle at him through tears.

You slightly peck his lips not intending on making it last longer, but Jungkook grabbed your chin and kissed you roughly the kiss soon turned into make out when he carefully takes you in his arms and kisses you.

He lays you down on your bed coming to kiss your neck leaving wet kisses and also sucking on few hickeys on his way down towards your pussy. Fuck you were already wet, his fingers soon finding your clit he groans “Fuck baby wet already?” He says rubbing them over your panties. Going face to face he removes your panties whining when he sees your slick connecting a string to your panties.

“Fuck Jungkook I’m so wet need your fingers now” you grab onto his hair already whining “yeah baby? Moan my name I like it when you say it” he smiles teasing is finger in your pink hole “mm put it in” demanding he inserts one “what a sight y/n” teasing you with his long fingers he fastens the speed hitting your g-spot making you moan loudly “kook right there” you say, “here baby?” He asks making sure just to hit the spot right after.

The feeling of his fingers inside you was overwhelming “too much” you whine when his tongue comes to press kisses on your clit “no kook sensitive” you cry “No y/n it’s never too much cum, pretty baby going to squirt?” He teases you knowing damn well Jungkook and his work with his fingers “cumming Jungkook” you say while squirting all over his fingers “that’s write made you a fucking mess” he growls.

Hovering over you his slick covered fingers make way in your mouth you suck like how suck his pretty cock removing his cloths his cock was now out of the boxers the tip swollen and red begging for attention when you slightly palm him.

Pushing him you were the one on top of him kissing him on the cheeks you make your way to his abs licking them and laying kisses all over them and pressing bunch of kisses on were your initials are tattooed “Fuck kook they look so hot every-time I see them” you moan now giving attention to his cock “take it in your mouth baby "you palm him giving kitten licks on the tip and fastening your pace “ oh shit” Jungkook groans his head moving backwards because of pleasure while your left hand comes near his to choke him  while hand hands make a ponytail for you hair  Such a head pusher “ fuck y/n, no baby going To cum inside you” he says swatting your hands in few seconds .

“Come on sit up on the bed yeah show me that pussy again yes baby?” He says while you’re slightly confused while he goes and grabs his phone asking for your consent “can I baby?” He asks while you verbally consent him “yeah go-ahead kook” his fingers coming back to your pussy he slightly rubs in between your lips while you grab in his palm telling him to touch you there, and he angles his phone perfectly “oh yeah kook” you murmur “moan baby moan” he praises you. Your pussy makes wet sloppy noises.

You grab on his hard on gently circling his tip. “Now want you inside kook” you say grabbing his phone and throwing at the end of the bed “hm lay on your back come on ready for some real champagne and confetti? “He asks giggling.  “Yeah, always ready for it” Missionary his favourite

Jungkook rubs his swollen tip sliding them in your pussy lips to wet himself enough to not hurt you. “Fuck such a tight fit” mumbling he starts delivering rough thrusts while your pretty manicured nails claw on his shoulder, his fucking sliver necklace swinging in front of your face makes him look ten times hotter than he already is.

“Fuck Jungkook, so big” you moan getting closer to your orgasm “kook cumming” you say while he backs away to look at the creamy mess between you both the white ring of your slick makes him thrust back even further roughly “fuck y/n, love fucking your pussy, love you baby “in the heat of moment you say it back not minding while you both soon chase your orgasm.

He cums right after you pulling out to make a mess with his spilling cum pushing it inside. He backs away collapsing next to you while you hug with your legs tucked on his

“Did you mean what you said Jungkook because I meant what I said” you asked hoping he would mean it too “Yes baby I’ve been in love with you like forever now but I was bit scared to admit it” he says hugging you tightly. 

“And about what happened in the door don’t think about we usually never cross paths but yeah he did get on my nerves” he explains so you would calm down about the matter “But kook it would be really dangerous if it would hit him on the head,” you said worrying “yeah baby I know I’ll talk to mother tomorrow morning let’s sleep? I know you are tired” he tucks you down and kissed your lips. 

Good night baby …. Jungkook whispers slightly humming a tune good night Jungkook hugging out a breath. Jungkook is left there thinking all night about the events.

Taglist : @babybella337 , @jungk97kwife , @kimmingyuswifee .

[tideswept]

I ship obikin with my whole heart, but love the idea of Anakin getting seduced by a different Jedi Master much older than him. Like, one who doesn't have as many qualms about getting with a freshly knighted Anakin. And Obi-Wan going so insanely jealous because he already pushed Anakin away because it's inappropriate, wtf is going on fellow Jedi Masters?!?! Anyway, all that to ask, who's a hot jedi master you think would be perfect for seducing Anakin and triggering Obi-Wan's possessive side?

ooh this is toooough. Hm.

Don't think Vos would do it, he can be snarky, sure, but there's no way that man doesn't know that Obi-Wan would be giving him bitchy side eye (and remarks) for life if he did that. Kit might because he genuinely would think it would be A Good Idea (maybe even a favor of sorts for Obi-Wan; he'd treat Anakin right!) but maybe that paints him as a bit of a himbo 😂 who somehow hasn't picked up on how weird Obi-Wan and Anakin are about each other.

I thought about Ti and Billaba but no way they're that dumb as to not realize what a mess they'd be getting into, and for baby freshly knighted Anakin? Not worth the drama.

What I realized after a bit of thinking is that no one who was consistently in Coruscant while the Temple was treated to the Obi-Wan/Anakin shenanigans would be that oblivious/cruel/reckless. So I'm afraid it would have to be someone who probably spent the last ten years in the bumfuck middle of nowhere, probably up to their eyeballs researching some borderline extinct species of Force-sensitive sea slugs, has effectively been incommunicado except for the occasion reports they send back, and then ends up returning to Coruscant, sees Anakin and decides, yes, studying the borderline extinct Force-sensitive sea slugs was a great use of their time, but they deserve a lil' treat now. 😏

(Obi-Wan had kept up with the reports on the Borderline Extinct Force-Sensitive Sea Slugs and was looking forward to meeting up with this Master to discuss nerd things.)

(Emphasis on was.)

[flowerwiththemachinegun]

Regional Music?

Slight Vincent x Ancient!Reader with no established relationship, just interest on Vince’s part. It’s just a headcanon, not an actual fic here but I enjoyed writing it. No smut here. Literally. For once.

This was an idea I had been sitting on for quite some time but not something I was going to turn into a big thing. But the regional music has me in a chokehold and wouldn’t it be cool if one could hear the planet in a far different manner? Maybe an Ancient who hears/feels negative and positive shifts in an area through the music thrumming faintly in the back of their head? The volume and sensation of the beat under your feet increases in battle or any disruptions within the region around you. This of course means you have a limited range and the regional music never overlaps. It can be helped to guide you in the right direction, or on occasion into some of the most grueling battles that would’ve been better off being avoided. Heightened emotions can also have an effect. Reader has a fighting style similar to Tifa’s. Materia use won’t be traditional for you either. Let’s take from the FF8 draw and junction system and tweak it a bit (simplify the shit out of it) and Yes I’m going to be lazy about when reader joins the party because my creativity isn’t sparking for backstory. 

****

Vincent had been quite a bit intrigued by you since the moment you joined the party. At first he was skeptical, as most were. Upon hearing your need to seek out Hojo and wipe him from existence, Vincent’s mind changed. He still hadn’t disclosed the full history between himself and the madman, what he learned from you seemed just as bad. There was no way to put on a scale had it the worst from Hojo, anyone that came in contact with him suffered a similar fate. Your capabilities were proven to be of no use to Shinra. Once rendered useless, you were cast into the shadows, only being taken care of enough to keep you alive as one of Hojo’s playthings. The years spent in his lab was a period filled with torture.

You seemed to be more of a loner than himself, another thing that gravitated him to you. Often scouting regions on your own, disappearing without a word only to come back with materials or bruised and bloody. In time he became the sole person to take care of you in the case you came back injured. Vincent easily was your go to for this, the fussing others would do over you was off putting and at times annoying. Getting hurt came with the territory, shouldn’t be a big deal. Only once Vincent made the mistake of chiding you for going out on your own to get into who knows what, immediately silencing himself as he was met with a glare. You were too injury prone for his liking. Knowing you were too hard headed to listen to anyone's advice, Vincent began going on these outings with you, training you along the way to reduce your chances of getting hurt. You were a great fighter, but you fought with so much energy you were a threat to yourself.

Speaking of fighting. The way you moved was like a dance to Vincent. Graceful yet powerful, pure raw energy exuding from you that was so contagious it boosted Vincent in battle. To say he loved the way you had no problem getting in the face of your opponent was an understatement. At times he felt as though he lived for it, you moved to your own beat at all times. Mesmerizing in his eyes with the way your intensity and style would change every now and then. Notably when they reached different areas of Gaia. 

Eventually Vincent felt inclined to ask why your fighting style is never consistent for very long. He knew you were an Ancient from what you told him of your past, but he hadn’t considered that one would be in tune with the planet in a vastly different way. Not in the form of music. He almost thought you were teetering on delusional had it not made perfect sense when he thought about your mannerisms on the field. Your uncanny sense of forewarning saved them many times.

“Even the towns have songs. They go along with the history, flora, fauna, and current residents of the town. The songs are created from energy held within the lands from things that have happened over time.” Vincent could hear you talk about this for the rest of his life, or well, the rest of your life. Everything about you was different, even the way you used materia. Instead drawing the power from it, the magic channeled through your hand to the rest of your body. It also happened by accident, holding any materia caused it to fuse with you, like you were a blackhole for magic. You never know exactly where it gets stored, just that you’re able to summon it as needed. The amount of power drawn from various materia increases the level of damage or healing you’re capable of. While you can use magic at any given time, the less materia you’ve stripped, the less effective your magic would be. Drawing was a necessity for you in order to keep up any worthwhile capabilities. This doesn't translate onto Summon materia.

Vincent wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or a horrifying warning, but the presence of Sephiroth evoked a nerve racking tune. One of the most complex you’ve heard thus far, the only sound that riddled you with fear. “That is not human, whatever he is supposed to be, is one that should not exist.” Being in the presence of the robed men sent, what you had dubbed the, One Winged Angel, spiraling in your mind. It was blaring, menacing, it was a warning that nothing other than pure destruction was imminent. No person came with a song, the exception being Sephiroth. What kind of energy could one possess to have such an imposing theme, one that would make the strongest of people coward. It riddled you with anxiety, more or less shaking you to the core. There was something else to it, pain. The pain was evident as the music boomed in your head. Always loud, intense, making you want nothing more than to shut out the entire world until you were the only one left. Remember, you can get a feel of Sephiroth’s history through his song, the longer you hear it, the more you understand him. He’s hurt by this world, leading Sephiroth the being the shell of himself he once was, becoming the tormentor to the world for treating him so cruelly. 

You were an enigma alright, somehow getting Vincent to understand the wonders of the planet through music he wasn’t capable of hearing himself. How was he to keep himself from falling in love with you?

[lonelyasawhisper]

Queen: A Night At The Garden

Kris Nicholson, Creem, 1st May 1977

Queen's music is like strong mouthwash. It takes my breath away but that initial rush is as temporary as it is abrupt. This probably has something to do with the discrepancy between what Queen is and what Queen would like to be. Queen IS a good studio band-cum-variety show with a flair for novelty, a patent on mock opera and Rock of Gibraltar guitar harmonies. What they would like to be is a good studio band and a great live act. Unfortunately they've mastered a studio perfection that does not lend itself to accurate live interpretation. Whether or not they choose to approach the two mediums separately, the fact remains: kids are amazed at Queen records and they expect to be doubly amazed by their concerts.

If Queen—without the assistance of tapes—could reproduce their studio sound live, they'd certainly be one of the most impressive bands on the rock scene. But they can't and they aren't and it's the vocals that cause most of the problem. They'd need at least five Freddie Mercurys [Aaargh!—Ed.] to do it right. (Imagine Mercury quints; five golden-throated, leotarded, stiffly posed fools.) If only Freddie Mercury could sing two notes at a time!

There is a gadget known as a harmonizer that provides a delayed echo and allows Freddie to harmonize with himself, but this effect has its limitations and is reserved for special occasions like "Killer Queen" and Freddie's spotlight solo in "White Man."

Lacking a consistently believable production of their music, the least Queen could do is compensate for aural imperfections with visual delights. Try as they might, their use of flash pots and strobe lights is old hat and the five basic postures in Freddie's crude ballet are amateur still life, pale in comparison to the volume and the ideas of the band's music.

Let us proceed to the actual scene of a Queen concert and see if we can discover just what keeps this band alive.

It is February 5th at Madison Square Garden. I see a sign bobbing and weaving through the upper aisles of the arena. At first it looks like it's moving of its own free will and then two heads become visible at either end of the banner. This is a familiar one. In three-foot high letters it boasts, "Queen is King." Behind and way above me, up in those seats in the clouds, (that us rock writers never get stuck in) there are two more signs held by fans. They read: "Queen A Night At The Garden" and "Queen Takes My Breath Away."

I wonder how many of these kids have seen Queen before. Will they be disappointed? Darkness sets in. The PA system blasts solo piano recital music that eventually fades into a tape of one of those majestic guitar intros Brian May likes to embroider around the beginning of his songs. The first chords of "Tie Your Mother Down," hit like thunder, maybe even induce butterflies in the stomach, temporarily.

The image of Freddie Mercury strikes. Decked in some kind of baggy white karate jump suit the singer looks sexier than he ever did in those ridiculous striped suspender shorts. For a moment Freddie has me believing that he's cut his overbearing physical exposure from the act. But by the third song he's stripped down to a second skin of white, commonly known as leotards. In Freddie's case they're pain in the ass leotards. Every five minutes he becomes distracted as a leotard strap shimmies down his shoulder. He searches for a moment when he can inconspicuously slide it back up before the whole damn thing falls off. Unfortunately Freddie is not cool about it. By the end of the set I'm almost more intent on calculating the next time a strap will drop and how he'll get it back up, than I am on hearing the music.

Freddie is a strange cookie on stage. He waves his magic wand (actually it's a mike stand but you can use your imagination) and the flashpots explode. No big deal. Personally I think the Wizard of Oz had better flashpots and that movie was filmed decades ago. Freddie addresses the audience, "Listen my darlings, let me do the talking for a change." Yecch! Too coy. I don't believe him.

"Somebody To Love" comes early in the set. This is what is called strategy. It comes early in the set because it's impossible to do justice to in concert. If everything else goes right, by the end of the show the kids will have forgotten how punchless the live version is in comparison to the lush production that stole thousands of AM hearts.

Deep down, underneath the black nail polish, there is some talent.

Besides Freddie, the only really visible member of Queen is Brian May. May is the exact opposite of Mercury— a real Yin-Yang combination. In the words of Chuan Tzu, "The perfect negative principle is majestically passive (May). The perfect positive (Mercury) is powerfully active...the interaction of the two results is that harmony by which all things are produced." Somehow it DOES work.

Wanna puck? Monreal Mercurys owner displays the franchise's new uniform. (Note the hand-tailored sleeves and custom-fitted mouthpiece).

May appears silent and serious. He plays guitar as if he were studying constellations. There is nothing silly about him. Even the starch in his Elizabethan white shirt fits. He looks elegant, contemplative, (a misplaced 18th century poet?) and yet he plays with all the erotic energy and guts of the heaviest and dirtiest of rock 'n' rollers. You could say he doesn't look like he sounds. But this inconsistency serves to make his character all the more enchanting.

During "Brighton Rock" Brian takes a long solo. With the use of two echoplex systems he manages to produce the sound of three guitars. It's a well-crafted solo with lots of showmanship and lots of clean, thoughtfully executed riffs. He hardly moves while he's playing. All the energy is flowing from head to fingers. It's one of the few moments in Queen's set where nothing threatens to cancel out the emotion of his playing. Looking back on this a moment later, it's easy to understand what Brian has in mind when he says, "I want to be good in the sense of being more expressive."

Queen dares to attempt May's Mccartneyish " '39." It doesn't fare too well. Freddie sings it. Freddie sings all the songs. Funny, on the record Brian sings " '39." Maybe he feels that singing would be too much of a diversion while he's playing guitar.

In introducing "You Take My Breath Away," Freddie announces, "Maybe next time we'll come back with an orchestra." (While he's at it I hope he remembers to bring a choir, too.) Freddie adds, "You are what we call our sophisticated rock audience." Is he laughing because he knows it's a joke or is he uneasy because that's what he'd like to believe?

Imagine (Freddie) Mercury quints; five golden-throated leotarded, stiffly-posed fools.

Meanwhile the set has been embellished with intermittent gimmicks; a roadie hands a triangle to bassist John Deacon to hit one solitary note. What drama! Brian May plays a ukelele for five seconds during the band's instrumental version of "Bring Back Leroy Brown," etc. etc.

Freddie's vocal exhibition in "White Man" is impressive. He manages to sound like a voice and an instrument at the same time. It offers substantial evidence that deep down, underneath the black nail polish, there is some talent. Too bad he has to mask it in such demeaning external distractions as his unsteady Ian Anderson pose and his off-time dances to the music.

"Bohemian Rhapsody" is the evening's anti-climax. When the song reaches the really ornate vocal rounds Freddie disappears from the stage and all twenty thousand of us are left sitting in the dark. It's like faking an orgasm (need I say that the real thing is so much better?). Of course this maneuver is done so that Freddie can change his costume but it doesn't sit too well with me, not to mention the fifteen-year-olds behind me who think they're being ripped off. After all, they can hear the record at home. They want to see Queen do the humanly impossible, and when they're slipped a fast one they know it. "This is unforgivable," says one kid. "Yeah, they're gonna haveta do somethin' big to make up for that," his friend replies. Hear that, boys? You can't fool Mother Nature.

Freddie returns in black tights. He looks much better in black, especially now that he's got one of those real slick short hairstyles. White is too feminine. Again, strategy saves the day. The kids have been screaming for "Stone Cold Crazy" all night and now, when they're feeling cheated, "Stone Cold Crazy" will pacify them.

"Stone Cold Crazy" is perhaps one of the most breathless hard rockers that Queen does (on record) but somehow it loses its bite when a series of strobe lights begin to flash to the beat and eventually wind up totally off-beat, turning the frenzied effect into gaudy confusion.

Freddie dedicates "Keep Yourself Alive" to the audience. "Liar" is followed by "In The Lap Of The Gods." There are two encores, so l'm told. I didn't stay for them. I came to see if Brian May still knew what he was doing—I didn't need any more Mercury shenanigans.

We turn now to the scene of the post-Queen party. It's held at Oh Ho So in So Ho and it's so-so. Freddie is reputed to have a fascination for the Oriental and that's as good a reason as any to jam 500 press people into a 250 capacity restaurant. The food in this joint is really good, I come here all the time. But food is not what I'm interested in. Standing well over six-feet-tall, Brian May is easy enough to spot but he's busy holding court. I can barely justify barging in on the ladies in waiting, the men in waiting, the fans in waiting...later.

"Yeah, I know Frampton sold millions of records, but I don't think you can capture the whole thing outside of a studio."

In the meantime my friend Liz and I have decided that we're going to corner Freddie and ask him what brand nail polish he wears. She sees someone she knows who knows who we want to meet (Freddie) and she manages to get introduced while I play voyeur. Alas, the best-laid plans of mice and women... Freddie's nails aren't black or white. They're just old plain old fingernails. But, we do manage to find out that Freddie has been asked to pose with Mr. Pumping Iron himself, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Whether or not the event will take place is still a mystery. Freddie wasn't giving any clues.

Queen poses at left, shortly after Brian May's guitar mysteriously exploded sending slivers of wood and steel into the eyeballs of the rest of the group, causing temporary blindness. The matter is under investigation by Scotland Yard. Below, Roger: "Aye likes to put me boogies in me pant cuff 'cause it keeps 'em clean...Wot about it?"

Freddy: "Aye think ee wants one on 'is lens, eh?"

After at least an hour of anxious waiting for parking space beside Brian I finally score. Yes, he remembers doing the interview last year, but he says I look different. Yes, it must be the glasses. I don't have them on tonight. I'm blind as a bat but you know what they say about girls who wear glasses.

Pulling no punches; I explain to Brian that I'm doing a Queen story for America's Only Rock 'n' Roll Magazine. I am totally understanding as he apologizes, "We haven't been doing interviews 'cause we're so busy. We're playing all big concert halls and we're in a different city every night. We travel about five hours every day. It's just too hectic." If he wasn't such a nice guy I'd be saying, bullshit, everyone else does it, but he is SUCH a nice guy and I sympathize with every word he says. Two points for the power of smooth talking.

I proceed to find out that the next album will NOT be named after a Marx Brothers movie, that Groucho owns an official Queen II jacket and that Queen will be meeting him in L.A. Rock on Groucho!

On the subject of the band's incessant use of gimmickry, Brian comments, "A Day At the Races can be seen as an extension of A Night At the Opera". Though last year Brian's favorite album was Queen II, this year he professes to like A Day At The Races despite its similarities to Opera. He had once expressed discontent with Opera due to the switch of emphasis from guitar riff-based rockers to experiments with instruments like the Toy Koto, the genuine aloha ukelele and "Good Company's" guitar jazz band, not to mention Freddie's obsession for music in the movie musical genre.

A Day At The Races is the first self-produced Queen album. Previous albums had been stamped with both the band's name and that of Roy Thomas Baker—the man who served as scapegoat for numerous accusations regarding overproduction. A Day At The Races bears a pattern of excess remarkably similar to that of A Night At the Opera. Of producer Baker, Brian said: "We grew together and now we've got our own things to do. We always had a lot to say about the production anyway," he added, hinting at the possibility that Queen's vices have long since been self-inflicted.

Considering the vast amount of time and money spent on studio technique it is not surprising to discover that even before May had heard the influential playing of guitarists like Page and Hendrix, he was fascinated by Phil Spector's productions. "They were very emotional and very slushy," he explains with a gleam in his eye. Strange combination this romanticism, this background in astronomy, this technician who built his own guitar from the wood of an antique fireplace, this man whose songs are to him "very personal." Strange that all these experiences convene in one brain and come out with a split vote, half in favor of the schmaltzy sentimentality of numbers like the Beatle-ish "Long Away," the other half thrashing out in malevolent waves of heavy sound and male chauvinism, witness "Tie Your Mother Down."

Getting back to the matter of production. Brian recognizes the discrepancy between the live and studio version of a song like "Somebody To Love." It doesn't seem to bother him. Being dead set against the possibility of a live album, why should he worry as long as he's so busy filling big arenas that he doesn't have time to do interviews. Still, his heart is into making good studio recordings. "If we did a live album, it would have to be really good, but I can't imagine it. I think live albums are a cop out." He pauses and smiles, "Yeah, I know Frampton sold millions of records, but I don't think you can capture the whole thing outside of a studio." This was all said with a degree of sincerity that I'd like to believe but a conflicting report challenges his position. Reliable sources seem to believe that Queen is considering the possibility of recording live in Japan this summer with the able assistance of none other than Roy Thomas Baker.

So Queen and success have met. So far the two are getting along. A year ago Brian May proudly announced that the only tape the band used was "God Save The Queen" at the beginning and ending of concerts. "We don't like the idea of using tapes as backing tracks," he explained. Considering the role tapes play in their current show, suffice to say times have changed.

A year ago Brian believed there were things Queen could do in a small theatre that they could never do in Madison Square Garden. "When you start playing those places you have to change your whole act. A group can become like a picture in a frame. Communication in arenas is much more difficult and needs to be approached carefully." Now that Queen is playing only big arenas Brian expresses a feeling of comfort within the new atmosphere, explaining that the band feels geared towards it now. Queen certainly manages to fill large halls with sound but whether they know it or not, they've not mastered a way of filling their new frame with a coinciding picture.

It's deadline day and devoted soul that I am I've taken it upon myself to listen to all the Queen albums in order. The first two are a breeze, Queen bouncing from melodic early Yes style to heavy Led Zep riffing and then on to the sledgehammer stance of Deep Purple at their most menacing.

By Sheer Heart Attack the seeds of gimmickry are planted and they begin to grow like a small malignant cancer. Freddie Mercury has stopped singing about mercury and biblical references are less frequent. The band's image becomes less majestic, more decadent, killer Queen, and then a complete turnaround with A Night At The Opera wherein the boys abandon guts for cutesy cleverness. It is by this album that Queen have become definitely Queen. Maybe the novelty twist is their only surefire approach to originality: heavy metal novelty? A Day At the Races, as accounted for earlier, is more of the same as Opera.

I can still hear Brian talking about Jimi Hendrix with a sense of awe: "He was the man." At the same time the image of Freddie comes into view. He is posing for pictures. He keeps an eye on his reflection in the mirror. He primps his jet black hair and snickers in a barely audible but intentional tone, "Got to keep up the image." It's hard to imagine a more diverse marriage of ideas. It's transient, it's experimental and it's confusing as hell.

Ever since their 1973 debut I've followed Queen. I've reviewed every album with enthusiasm and then somehow forgotten them until the next release reminded me that I like the last one. I get all excited when a Queen record comes out, but it doesn't last. What's the answer? Staying power? Preservatives? It's driving me stone cold crazy.

Retrieved from The Creem Archive

[marymary-diva17]

Hello there! How about something mixed of angst and wholesome?

Ronal births her third child [Y/N] , was a momentum occasion. But after the lose of neteyam, neytiri can't help but be a bit close to reader . Too close for ronal's comfort.

Thank you!! 💞💞💞

mother ronal x daughter reader + neytiri

avatar masterlist

A gift of a child could change anyone life upside down, but mostly when it came to a parent a new one or old one. As their lives will never be the same ever again. Mother was always the ones that seem to be great changed when it came to a child of their own or another child. The life of a child was something that was so precious and taken serious, but when it come sot a lost of a child there was grief that was will overcome a parent. This grief will sometimes change a parent and nothing will ever be the same again, now what does someone do when a grief as overtake a mother and brith of other child has overtaken another mother as well.

Ronal " thank you neytiri for watching over my daughter as I take some time off and work" ronal had given brith to her third child and she had become overwhelmed, and was seeking some help so went to neytiri. A women with many children and seem to have a good experience with dealing with so many children at once.

neytiri " sure it good to be helpful towards you ronal I will make sure the child is safe and well take care of"

ronal " thank you again so much" ronal had nodded her head she soon kissed her daughter goodbye before leaving, it seems like both mother had been affect by the major events of this week.

neytiri " it going to be okay young one" neytiri held you in her arms she was starting to remember the days when all her kids were, this small and so cute. It had been some time since she had laid her oldest son to rest, and she had become very affected by the whole matter.

neytiri " lets hope you don't have to face the hardships of war and the effects of the evil humans that come" since neteyam death neytiri had become more overprotective of her family, she didn't wish to lost anyone else to the demons.

neytiri " you remind me so much of my boy neteyam .... so fill with joy and wonder" you had looked at her giving neytiri and gummy smiling making her smile as well, she remembered when her kids use to smile at her like that.

neytiri " oh did y/n you are a child of the great mother who has blessed you into many people lives" neytiri was sitting down and play with you, watching you splash your hands in a puddle of water. The laughter of a child was something that could bring a smile to anyone at the moment.

neytiri " wait not put that down" neytiri saw you grab a bug as you were trying to eat it but, she had taken it out from your hands. This had made you look sad and soon tears starting coming down from your face.

neytiri " hush little one don't cry it okay it all okay little one" neytiri soon picked you up and started rocking you, trying to make you stop crying and making you happy again.

neytiri " it will be okay it will all be okay" neytiri soon stated signing a lullaby she knew from the forest, and it seems to making you clam down.

????? " neytiri" neytiri soon turned around and saw ronal standing there, it seems like ronal might of been there for a while now. So she saw and heard everything that had happen at the moment.

nwytiri " oh ronal"

ronal " I came to check on my daughter to see how everything was going, but it seems like it going well"

neytiri " ........"

ronal " ......." both mother were looking at each other not saying anything.

ronal " neytiri would you like to go for a walk"

neytiri " yes" the two women soon went for a walk ronal was now holding you in her arms, the two women walking with each other.

ronal " I want to say seeing you so close to my daughter make me uncomfortable"

neytiri " I'm sorry"

ronal " no I'm not mad I feel jealous since my daughter brith I feel like I can't connect with her, and the fear of losing her as well"

neytiri " a parent shouldn't have to lose a child"

ronal " I'm sorry for the death of your son he was a great boy and warrior as well"

neytiri " he was the best your daughter will be great one day, but I fear for her and all the children ... that this war will keep going on and ruin their lives that they wouldn't have normal lives anymore"

ronal " yes many lives had bene lost and destroyed"

neytiri " I wish the children will not have to live during a time of war, but I feel like that going to happen anyways"

ronal " as mother we have to protect our children but there are times, when we can't always keep them safe from harm" ronal ahd kissed your forehead and you were babbling about something.

ronal " my daughter will have to face war when she older and I don't, know how to explain everything that happing to her"

neytiri " you are not alone ronal I have faced that as well when the times comes you will tell her, and but when she older enough this all will be over and she will start the times of peace and harmony"

ronal " I hope so" Both women were sitting on the dock together walking and watching over you as you, were playing with some wooden toys.

neytiri " we are mother we will always love our children and do anything for them, I feel like I failed as mother my son dead"

ronal " you haven't failed neytiri you are good mother and maybe one day you will see him again, just because he no longer here he will never be forgotten" neytiri node her head towards ronal it seems like the two had bonded over something else, as they watched you play and smile. They were hoping that this war will end so all of their children will be safe form harm and that they can live normal lives, and bring back the peace and harmony to pandora.

sorry this request us late I have been busy with my life that I was held up on request, and I was working on other stuff as well.

[devildom-moss]

“I wanted to tell you first” (good) (the demon brothers)

What do the demon brothers go to MC first for? What is it that they desire to share with MC before anyone else?

(the demon brothers x gn!MC)

(suggestive for some of the brothers: Lucifer, Asmo, Beel)

Lucifer

You are the first to know when Lucifer obtains a new cursed record. Diavolo used to be the first to know and was occasionally the one who obtained the record for Lucifer, but now (much to Diavolo’s disappointment), Lucifer goes to you first. Unless the record is dangerous for humans, he’s excited for you to listen to it with him before he shows anyone else. Sometimes this can mean calling you into his study late at night so he can cherish a few moments alone with you. Until Lucifer can have you all to himself, he keeps the information about his new record a secret. The anticipation is subtly visible in him when he has to wait to listen to it with you. Sometimes, that means just being more lenient with his brothers, and other days, it elicits more laughter from him and sweet grins when he thinks no one else is looking.

“You seem to be in a good mood today, Lucifer. Did something happen?”

“You’re quite observant. Meet me in my room tonight after dinner.”

Lucifer will pull out a bottle of Demonus for the occasion. If you want it, he’ll have a short lecture about the origins of that particular cursed record – including the potential side-effects in case you decide you don’t want to risk it. He feels it is a necessity that you are prepared to enjoy the listening experience with him, especially for records that have aphrodisiac-like curse symptoms. Lucifer is always a bit horny for you, but if there is a chance he might want to pounce on you later and not be able to control his urges well, he’d rather you opt out early on and not have to see him like that. If you agree to stay, he asks you to spend the night every time.

Even if Lucifer has the opportunity to listen before he shares the record with you, if it’s a song or album he has never heard before (unless he needs to determine what the potential effects on you would be), he’ll wait to listen to it with you. If you ask him, he may tell you that he waited to listen with you, but he’s too embarrassed to admit how much he cherishes being able to share those firsts with you – especially considering how old he is. He never imagined he could still have so many firsts until he met you.

Mammon

Mammon comes to you first with almost any good news, but especially with news about getting good grades and other personal successes. Did he just win big at a casino? You’re the first one he tells. Who else would he want to spend his winnings on, anyway? Did he pass his last Devildom history exam with a B+? He rushes to find you and show you his exam paper with the biggest grin on his face. Did he score a modeling gig with one of his favorite brands (or better yet, one of your favorite brands)? He tells you as soon as he’s notified.

Mammon tends to preface his good personal news with “you’ll never guess what the Great Mammon did.” If he wasn’t smiling like a carefree fool, you might worry that he had gotten in trouble again. Although a quiet part of him believes that you really wouldn’t be able to guess what he accomplished because he isn’t exactly known for his vast array of successes, he craves your faith in him with his entire being. Mammon wants to surprise you with how good he’s doing for himself, but he also wants to impress you so much that you’ll never be shocked by his success. When it boils down, Mammon wants to make you proud of him. As such, he takes all his accomplishments directly to you. Lucifer is a close second, but the praise from his beloved brother could never compete with how he feels when you smile at him and tell him what a good job he has done.

Although he doesn’t mean to, sometimes after Mammon gives you the good news, he lowers his head slightly, eyes fixed on the floor, as if he’s waiting for you to pet him. If all you do is congratulate him, he will perk up and brag a bit (“Well, you are talking to the Great Mammon, after all.”). If you take the hint, his face will heat up and he may protest, but he’ll melt under your touch so quickly that his actions will betray his words.

“Stop pettin’ me already!”

“Mammon, you’ve literally been sitting in my lap and nuzzling my hand on your own for the past minute. I haven’t even moved.”

“Shuddup and go back to saying nice stuff about me.”

Leviathan

Not only does Levi come to you when he has an otaku fail, he also comes to you first when he has an otaku win. Sometimes that means calling you to scream in your ear about obtaining Sucre Frenzy tickets or unboxing his new Ruri-chan merch with you, but more often than not, he comes to you first about his game wins – especially when he gets a good gacha pull or defeats a tough boss. He has a few reasons for coming to you first. For one, Levi is used to his brothers and friends ignoring him when he goes on about his games and anime. Sometimes, especially in the cases of Lucifer, Simeon, and Barbatos, they have no clue what Leviathan is even talking about. Being dismissed or even ridiculed will hurt his feelings and ruin his joy and excitement. However, Levi trusts you with his heart, and he’s willing to put his joy on the line every time with you.

Another reason why Levi comes to you first with his otaku wins is because you are precious to him, and he can’t imagine wanting to share his happiness with anyone more than you (except maybe Henry 2.0). He’s usually pretty moody or at least prone to negativity, so when he’s hit with bouts of joy, Levi is eager to showcase this positive side of himself for you. Maybe if you see that he can be more than a depressed, self-conscious, jealous otaku, you might love him even more.

Furthermore, Levi is self-conscious about how he expresses his joy. Levi strikes me as someone who happy stims, often by bouncing his heels, shaking one or both of his hands back and forth as if fanning himself, or shaking his head. He’s so afraid that someone will tell him he looks stupid and crush his joy completely, but he can’t help it. The more he holds himself back, the more restrained and diminished his happiness feels. But again, Levi trusts you so much. He knows (or at least wants to believe) that he can be free to express himself around you – if no one else.

Letting him be himself, loving him enough to listen, and sharing in his happiness are precious gestures that he appreciates more than he can say, which is why he comes to you first with these things. That earned trust has adorable rewards, such as Levi getting so excited that he hugs or kisses you of his own volition before getting flustered but asking to continue anyway.

Satan

You are the first to know when Satan has inside information about new events and shops that he receives from acquaintances. Even if the event is being scheduled on the low, he trusts you not to tell anyone before it’s appropriate (and he’ll tell you not to say a word when he needs to keep the information secret). He wants to show off his connections a bit, but moreover, he just wants to let you know because you might find something new to be interesting and may want to start making plans in advance. Furthermore, Satan likes being able to take advantage of his inside knowledge to ask you out before anyone else gets a chance. The less competition he has to contend with, the better.

“Ah, MC. I heard that there’s going to be a pop-up night market downtown the weekend after next,” Satan brought up casually.

“Oh? I didn’t hear anything about it yet, but that seems fun – if it won’t be too busy.”

“I know someone on the planning committee. She told me that they just finalized the date with Diavolo yesterday. They’re just preparing the marketing and advertising plan. Are you interested in going – with me, that is?”

Satan wants to ask you out first, but he’s also extremely excited to share interesting Devildom events and places with you. He’d hate for you to get bored with the Devildom (or with him), and new things are a great opportunity to ensure you enjoy your life there.

Typically, Satan tells you calmly and informally in-person once he can get you alone for a few minutes. However, when it’s an event or shop that he’s excited for (especially things like new cat cafés and pop-up book sales), he might call you instead of waiting. If he does wait, he’ll be visibly excited when he sees you, eagerly getting you alone so he can tell you. When he’s excited about the information, Satan will practically beg you to go out with him. If it’s something he cares about, he’s desperate to share that experience with you (in part because he knows he’ll enjoy it even more if you’re by his side, and partly because he knows he won’t enjoy it fully if he has to think about you being there with someone else).

Asmodeus

Asmo wants you to be the first to know when he designs new products or gets on magazine covers. It’s so important to him that you know when he’s accomplished something, and as much as loves sharing his sense of beauty with his adoring followers, that could never compare to his need to share that with you. You’re one of the most beautiful things to ever exist in Asmo's eyes; it only makes sense that he would have to share his gorgeous creations or even more lovely image with you – he just also happens to want to share them with you before he can share it with anyone else. Asmo is so serious about you needing to know first that he will reschedule announcements if he doesn’t have the chance to tell you before the announcement would go up. If you hear about if from anyone else, he will sulk all day – even if you praise him for a job well-done.

“Ugh, but I was supposed to tell you!”

“I’m still really proud of you, Asmo. This jewelry line is gorgeous. It really captures your essence, too. The pink star ruby encircled by the scorpion’s tail is lovely, and you were the perfect model.”

“Of course I was, but I worked so hard on that line and that photoshoot took hours. I wanted you to know before anyone else found out. It was supposed to be a big surprise.”

“It was still a surprise.”

“But I didn’t get to see the look on your face when you found out.”

Asmo will pout no matter what you say. The best course of action would be to offer him some sort of physical affection (a hug, cuddling, kisses, head, sex) until he feels better. He may be overdramatic, but that’s how much he values sharing parts of himself with you and you alone. It isn’t until after Asmo fails to inform you first that he realizes how much he cherishes the few hours or days when only you two know. For that short window of time, Asmo feels the spotlight over him shut off, and he finds your body in the dim Devildom starlight where the only visible thing is your sweet, adorable face. If he’s lucky, you won’t be able to turn your gaze away from him.   

Beelzebub

When you aren’t able to show up and watch Beel at his sports games and competitions, the second thought in his head after he wins a game (after how hungry he is feeling) is how you’ll react when you find out that he won. Beel will get giddy over the idea of you hugging him or caressing his cheek and telling him that he did a good job. He won’t rush home – especially if he’s hungry and needs to get something to eat – but his mind will wander and imagine all the ways you might praise him or reward him for winning until he sees you again. Beel will start to smile for seemingly no reason after a game, but that’s just because he’s excited to tell you how well he (and his teammates) did. If Beel is feeling impatient, he will let you know via message. It isn’t the same as getting to see your face when he tells you, but he still holds out hope that you’ll praise him in-person.

Before, Lucifer and Belphie were the first to find out that Beel had won. It doesn’t register to Beel that he goes to you first, and he can’t remember when or exactly why he started to do that. All he knows is that he has never enjoyed being praised by anyone more than you, and that’s justification enough for him to keep doing it.

On the rare occasions that Belphegor is the only one who can attend Beel’s match, if Belphie falls asleep before the game ends, Beel will let his brother stay asleep afterward – even opting to carefully carry him home to avoid waking him up. Beelzebub does that because he’s nice and wants to let Belphie rest, but he also does it so he can tell you he won before Belphie wakes up.

Whenever Beel is in a slightly frisky mood or has been feeling lonely, he will ask you to kiss him as a reward for doing so well. When Beel is feeling pent up, he may be blunt and sexual: “MC, as a reward for winning, can I suck your dick/eat you out?” Even if you try to explain to him that it sounds more like a reward for you, he’ll tell you that he just asked for what he wanted.

Belphegor

Belphegor tells you immediately when he finds out about upcoming meteorological events and new plants in the botanical gardens. He didn’t used to care about telling anyone about anything like that before you came along. If he found out about a meteor shower or saw an impressive new plant the last time he ventured to the botanical gardens, he might have brought it up to his brothers casually in passing – often days or weeks after finding out. However, after you, he can’t seem resist the urge to let you know right away, typically through a message. Belphie might call if the event is occurring at that moment or will be happening shortly/soon enough that he can’t wait for you to read the text. He might also call if he wants you to meet him in the gardens as soon as possible for a date.

Belphie uses these updates as an excuse to ask you out. When he tells you, he typically follows that by asking you to check it out with him. He doesn’t feel that he needs to specify that he intends it as a date unless you bring up inviting anyone else. In that case, he will clarify his intentions, but he’ll pout and be upset that you didn’t seem content to go with him alone. The reason why Belphie gets upset that you invited someone else is because both updates are about things Belphegor cares about. The stars and the gardens are two of Belphie’s favorite things about the Devildom. By telling you about meteorological events and new plant specimens, he is inviting you to share in some of his interests. He craves a deeper connection with you and figures that bonding over something you both enjoy might help, so he tries to expose you to cool (by his standards) plants and meteorological events as often as possible to get you interested.

Even accidentally rejecting his plan for a date to enjoy his interests alone hurts his feelings – as if you were rejecting a part of him. Still, the occasional rejection isn’t bad enough to make Belphegor give up on dozens of date opportunities every year. He’ll stop pouting if you give him enough attention or if you just give him a day or two.

(the demon brothers, bad version)

[espionn]

SeaWing tribe sheet!

seawings my beloved. i didnt do anything too crazy with them but they deserve to be a bit over-the-top. (also, lmk if anyone is interested in a size comparison chart and/or an evolutionary tree for the tribes because i might do those if people would like it)

Physical Appearance + Traits:

-SeaWings are almost entirely aquatic dragons. They can live and breathe out of water, but vastly prefer their ocean habitat, and too much time out of water can dry and dull their scales. 

-They have short legs with wide, webbed talons which they use to propel through the water. They also have long, thick and powerful tails. SeaWings cannot be called comparatively large or small due to these unique proportions.

-Not unlike MudWings, SeaWings can fly, but aren’t skilled at it. Their wings have adapted to be used essentially as large fins to steer accurately through the water, and are not as effective for flight. They sometimes can leap from the water and catch air like flying fish, but they struggle to get fully off the ground; their wings are better suited for passive gliding.

-The pale marks that cover their bodies can be used to create bioluminescent light, so efficiently that SeaWings can turn individual lights on and off at will, and even control the dimness. They use these marks in flashing patterns to communicate underwater, in a language called Aquatic. Phrases in Aquatic are often less about individual words assigned to specific combinations - though that can be applied to some - but more about the overall visual expression. (For example, in the right context, random and scattered twinkling refers to stars, or the night sky.) Aquatic, like much of SeaWing culture, is loose, expressive and artistic.

-Large and airy frills run along their bodies, connecting at the tail. These bolden their appearance and make some swimming patterns almost mesmerizing.

-Colors, like many SeaWing traits, vary greatly, but blues and greens are most common. Grays, purples and even pinks also appear on occasion. 

-Due to the vastness of the oceans, there are multiple variants of the typical SeaWing. Living outside the sea kingdom, near the coral reefs bordering the mud kingdom and rainforest on the east side of Pyrrhia, are the fittingly-named Coral SeaWings, which are brightly-colored with rougher and rockier scales (and even minor color-changing abilities). Another group, with sightings so rare as to be unconfirmed beyond urban legend, is the Deep SeaWings; almost nothing is known about these besides a dark and spiny appearance with vivid bioluminescent markings. 

-Gills allow underwater breathing; small lungs allow above-water breathing, but not as strongly or reliably. SeaWings also have a few adaptations that allow them to withstand pressure changes.

Life Cycle:

-SeaWings are laid in clutches of anywhere between 6 and 12. It’s these large groups that will make up their friends and peers for the first few years of their lives. SeaWing parents are present for the incubation and hatching of the eggs, and they are fiercely protective parents when the dragonets are very young, but most dragonets begin to be more independent after that. 

-While the sibling clutches aren’t as close as MudWing troops, they do tend to be quite interdependent and prefer each other’s company. Once they get a bit older, though, they often branch off and find friends and romantic partners outside this group. 

-SeaWings are monogamous and mate for life. It isn’t uncommon for the first dragon they show interest in to be the one they stay with. Both parents are considered equally responsible for dragonets if they have them.

-Because they’re hatched underwater, dragonets don’t learn to speak aloud, walk on land or fly until they’re several years old; some never do in detail, instead living underwater without contact with other tribes for their entire lives.

Culture and Society:

-SeaWing society is structured and organized around the royal family, who have great cultural influence and wealth. The Deep Palace alone holds about 40% of the SeaWing population, and it is by no means a small tribe.

-Arts are a huge cultural mark of the Sea Kingdom - no other tribe, aside from the NightWings, has such expansive literature, and SeaWing sculpting and jewelry-making is famous across Pyrrhia. Before the war, in fact, one of the main exports of the Sea Kingdom came from art exhibits - festivals held on near-shore islands, where dragons from all different tribes would come, to enjoy the scenery as well as look at and/or buy various displays of SeaWing art. 

-This is one of the most social and closely-bonded tribes; with talons mainly made for mobility, dull horns, and no breath weapon, SeaWings depend on each other for safety, and their society is close-knit. Social norm intricacies, politeness in language, and subtly complex ranks and boundaries are all cultural things that dragons simply adapt to by being around it.

-The SeaWing education system is one of the most successful and robust, with every dragonet attending a school for at least two years. If they choose, there are also more specific career paths they can take if there’s an area they’d like to specialize in. They are taught extensively in literature and history, basic hunting and self-defense, and basic land language and skills, such as how to walk and fly. 

-Even more than other dragons, they take great care to keep their scales and frills shiny and healthy. In-depth cleaning methods are abundant, to keep barnacles and parasites off of them, and SeaWings in general are seen as much more attractive when they’re polished and unscratched. As they get older and move less, it may become harder to keep barnacles and algae off, but some SeaWings accept this and allow themselves to take on a “stones in a tide pool” look as a clear indication of age. SeaWings also enjoy jewelry, particularly made up of pearls and precious stones on strings; gold and silver don’t work as well underwater.

-They are resourceful and use a wide variety of tools; the fact that they have few natural defenses has led to a greater use of weapons than most other tribes, for example.

Diet: Facultative carnivorous (mostly meat). Fish, shellfish and crustaceans make up the vast majority of their diet, but their meals can also include a few types of seaweed, seagrass and other aquatic plants. In the palace, large hunting groups provide food for the entire population, but SeaWings who live outside of it usually provide food for themselves.

[ninjakk]

Hey!!

I recently saw someone claim that Wei Wuxian was starved of conversation on his journey to Yiling with Lan Wangji and Wen Ning and so board he needed to chat to people before they ascend the mountain. I hadn't really noticed this until it was mentioned. What do you think of that scene?

I love your meta and fics btw. You use your understanding of the novel in your writing and it's just *chef's kiss*

Hi anon 👋🏻

Personally, I've not seen any comments regarding the above - but we can certainly look at the text in question 😊

Let's take a look at the scene in question:

Several days later, they arrived in Yiling.

The Burial Mounds were less than five kilometers ahead of this small town. Although they didn’t know exactly what awaited them there, Wei Wuxian had a feeling it wasn’t anything good. But Lan Wangji was right by his side, his gait steady, his gaze cool. Wei Wuxian had never been one with any sense of crisis to begin with, and with the way Lan Wangji looked, he was even less likely to get nervous at all.

Passing through the small town of Yiling, he was awash in the sounds of the local accent. It was invigorating and incomparably endearing. While he wasn’t planning on buying anything, he couldn’t help but strike up conversations in the local dialect with the street vendors. Only after he’d had his fill of socializing did he get down to business.

“Hanguang-jun, you remember this town, right?”

7S translation

So the scene opens with WWX gushing over how safe and happy he feels around LWJ. He's just so thankful to have someone by his side, someone he can fully depend on and is there for him, should he need it. This very much echoes his thoughts from when they began their descent from the Cloud Recesses, at the start of their journey here. For someone nearing the place he met such a gruesome end at previously, he seems incredibly content and calm - all thanks to LWJ. So straight away, we are reminded of how WWX feels around the other man. It's there for a reason, to set the scene. WWX is relaxed and enjoying himself because he's with LWJ.

They have just arrived in a city he is very familiar with. It's the place he both lived as an orphan and frequented as a man while residing at the burial mounds. He is surrounded by the accent of his "home" for the first time in over 13 years and it's making him feel sentimental. I also think it's a great parallel between when WWX finally visits Lotus Pier in the coming chapters and how desolate and subdued the place has become since JC became sect leader.

I think the above reaction is very normal considering the emotional impact it obviously had on him. WWX has already stated on numerous occasions that LWJ makes him happy and he enjoys his company, but he's also very sociable and likes to look around markets and chat with vendors - there's even a scene in the novel which states as such and many other examples. Although WWX is running around chatting and exploring the stalls, LWJ is still by his side. Doing so does not subtract from his obvious enjoyment of having LWJ's unwavering presence.

We see more than enough evidence that WWX happily chats to LWJ and that he, in turn, even responds and asks questions also. There seems to be this mind-boggling misconception that LWJ literally doesn't speak, and if he does he's like some caveman that can't communicate effectively, when it's the exact opposite. LWJ talks when necessary and is very succinct with his words - he's a true gentleman of their time. Of course, in comparison to WWX, he's much less chatty - but when he does talk it's sincere and relevant. WWX loves this about him! He's also an incredible listener and doesn't miss a single thing WWX says, which WWX also appreciates! Hardly anyone listens to all his ramblings and holds them all so dearly!

It's funny, because although WWX chats to anyone and everyone, it's obvious he enjoys conversing with LWJ the most. He treasures the fact they are on the same wavelength and understand each other implicitly 🥰

Aww! Thank you so much anon! I'm glad you are enjoying my meta and fics ❤️

I hope I managed to answer your question! Have a lovely day 😘

[practical-hearthcraft]

Crafting Your Own Intuitive Spells

Alternative titles: How to Customise Your Own Spells OR The Importance of Learning Magical Theory.

Hi, hello. I want to talk about how you can learn to design your own spells for your specific needs and provide some insight on why magical theory is so important and how we can apply that knowledge. I'm not particularly eloquent, but I really feel this is crucial information for any baby/beginner witches who are looking to deepen their craft and develop their skills further.

As you develop your practice and learn more about what works for you, you might find the spells you come across online don't quite suit your needs. At this point it's vital to have a firm understanding on core theory so that you can develop spells and rituals which resonate with you specifically.

So, how do we do this? To break it down, I'm going to walk you through an example spell I've recently worked on. I'll explain why I chose which components and why, and hopefully, it can spark a conversation and provide some insight. So grab a cup of something warm, and let's get into it!

I'm also tagging @ofdirtandbones, @drinkbooksreadtea, and @spilledmagic13, who commented on my interest post. I hope you guys find this useful!

We're going to work through a popular spell format, a money jar spell.

We all love a jar spell as they don't need a lot of expensive or hard-to-track-down components, and they're great for manifestation spells, but if you want it to be effective, you need to customise it to your needs specifically.

First things first, we need to identify what we want to achieve. On this occasion, I am looking for something powerful but long-lasting. I am performing this for both my dad and husband as they're both facing similar situations at work, and both have the chance to lead to some financial success.

The second thing I need to do is look at my own craft and identify my strengths. Personally, I have strong ties to herbs, plants, and crystals, as I'm very much an earth-element-influenced witch. I also prefer to conduct my spells outside in nature, and I find weather plays into how I channel my intent.

The trick to intuitive spellcasting is marrying the intent to the practitioner. As you will see, many of my choices for this spell are really personal. I think this is often why a lot of the spells, etc, you see online are aimed more at beginner witches. Each witch's craft will be so personal to them as they develop relationships with different plants, crystals, etc, so no two witch's grimoires will ever look the same. A witch who works with celestial aspects may wait for a specific planetary alignment or choose herbs that correspond with The Sun for power and success. A witch more called to the element of water might want to use a specific type of water infused with herbs and (water/salt resistant) crystals.

So, let's get into it!

Most of the time, I tend to follow a particular routine of questions when designing a spell.

Timing: Is the timing of these spells going to be important? Well, I want this to affect careers and wealth, so if I'm working with correspondences in nature, I want to time this during the waxing of the moon to invoke manifestation, growth, abundance and a sense of drawing wealth towards the subjects of the spell. I don't worry about the day of the week as I don't hold any pantheon, and many of the links there are based on the gods. If you are an observer of a particular pantheon, you may wish to call on the aid of a specific deity who will be linked to a particular day, thus influencing the timing of your spell.

Elements: Which elements might we want to use for this spell? As mentioned, I'm very nature based and channeling the elements really helps. Because I want to focus on wealth and material abundance, this is definitely going to be an earthy spell. That means I'm going to use a lot of herbs. Earth is a slow-moving element which will give me the long-lasting effect I want, especially given that it's a jar spell, so I'm going to balance this out with Fire as well. Fire is really good when I want to add some oomph, and its faster nature should hopefully balance out the slower pace of Earth. I don't like my spells to only call on one element as I find it can then be out of balance, and in my experience, that often leads to undesirable outcomes. Fire is a great element for expansion, and conversely, Earth is wonderful for stability, both aspects I want to include.

Foci: What tools do I want to use to help focus my intention? I love using crystals as physical anchors during my spells. I find they really help me keep focus and harness my intent. I also like to reflect on my tarot cards, as this can help me explore different aspects and outcomes of whichever spell I'm working on, which can also help strengthen my intent.

Power: How powerful do I need this spell to be? Is this a little boost I need in some part of my life or are we looking for big changes to be made? Energy = Power here, so if I want significant results that will have long-lasting positive effects, I want to ensure that the spell I cast is a big one. For me that means layering intention and meaning through multiple components. Go big or go home.

Okay, so I've considered my goal, my strengths and personal correspondences, and I've established certain pillars of the spell I want to incorporate. Now we tie it together! This is the fun part.

On this occasion, I decided to set up a bowl outside to burn herbs of my choosing. I would use the time of the fire burning to focus on my intent and hopes for the spell, and then I would collect the ashes into a jar, which I would seal and keep on my altar until I saw the desired outcome.

Choosing herbs will be straightforward for most practitioners. I say most because so much of the herblore available online is based on Western correspondences. If you are a witch practising in the Caribbean, for example, you might find certain plants hold different meanings than if you were working out of Scotland. So, where possible, work with the herb meanings of your culture, and you'll find it much more powerful.

I decided I wanted to work with Bay, Mint, Basil and Cloves. 5 is my lucky number, so I chose 5 leaves/cloves of each. I'm fortunate to have a pretty nice garden, so I also elected to use plants from my own home, specifically because I was trying to direct wealth towards family members, and I felt using herbs grown in my own home would lend strength to that. I also included salt in my bowl. I chose Bay, Mint and Basil as personally all three symbolise wealth, abundance and prosperity to me. I chose Salt and Cloves for protection. I personally always include protective magic in money spells as I have no interest in dirty money coming my way, especially if I'm acting on behalf of loved ones. Salt to me, also holds an aspect of hard work which is a trait held by both targets of this spell so it felt fitting.

As I was going to be burning things and I'm lucky enough to be openly witchy, I got a fire pit and set it up in my garden once the moon had risen in the sky. I use an app for that timing. As much of my craft is rooted in a mixture of English Cunning and Welsh Folk magic, I chose to face North for Earth. Your cardinal directions may differ depending on your practice.

As I added each herb to the bowl, (fireproof, with a bucket of water close by for safety) I called on the property of the plant. I'm not one for chanting or rhyming, but if you are and you find it beneficial, please feel free to say something at this point. Once all components were added, I wrote down my intention for each target of the spell on some paper, wadded them up, and added them to the bowl as well. Then I lit a match and set fire to the contents.

Just a practical note here: fresh herbs don't burn well! So if you're burning something, try to either use dry herbs or you can dry your own fresh herbs in an oven or dehumidifier.

While my fire burned, I held onto some aventurine (for creativity, the release of blockages and good fortune) and the IX of Pentacles for my foci. As I wasn't burning a large amount, the fire didn't burn for too long, but I made sure to really focus on my intent while it burned.

Once the fire was out I carefully collected the ashes into a jar. Again, as a practical measure, I went for a screw-top jar. This is mainly because a money jar needs to be shaken daily, and I don't want to have to worry about ash getting all over my clothes and altar each morning, so I wanted something that would have a good seal. I didn't want to seal with wax; I have found wax seals are better for banishment or containment spells than spells where I need some movement of energy.

Once my jar was filled, I added some pennies, sealed it shut, and placed it on my altar. I had cleansed the jar itself with some incense prior to use, and I'd anointed it with some prosperity oil, so it was all good to go. I shake it daily and have already seen some positive outcomes.

If you've made it to the end of this example, well done, and thank you! I hope this provides some guidance on how you can begin to develop your own spells. If you have any follow-up questions or thoughts, my ask box is always open. If you disagree with any of the above, I'd love to hear from you and learn more about your approach.