#I have tried. there’s a lot of things I’ve tried. and I really want to get better and not be like this anymore and have things change

[dollyyun]

VIDEO CALL ✧ L.HS

SYNOPSIS ✧ you’ve been missing your boyfriend a little too much, yearning him to return to your arms, but you need him more than ever. seeing how desperately you crave him, he offers a solution that eventually leads to the two of you having video sex.

PAIRING ✧ idol bf!heeseung x fem reader

WARNINGS ✧ soft and sappy in the beginning, loverboy heeseung, reader whines a lot, reader is so fucking needy (i know i am), video call sex, masturbations, fingering, clit stimulation, mild degradation, uses of dildo, orgasms, dirty talks, praise kink, daddy kink, heeseung is so in love, idk what else

WORD COUNT✧ 9.4K

A/N ✧ idk how to write a good video call smut (or a good smut in general) but idc bc i HAD to get this out of my system and i enjoyed writing it since i’ve been going insane in oomf’s dm about this weverse live heeseung specifically. oomf told me how i was really down bad for this heeseung and the way he made me so needy for him plsplspls I NEED HIM SO BAD IT ACHES- anyways, this was supposed to be a drabble but i got carried away. enjoy this light and fun fic :3 or don’t.

The thumping of your heart amplifies as soon as his handsome face appears on your phone screen. His hair looks slightly dishevelled, and he is still adorned in the same sweater he was wearing three hours ago when he was doing a Weverse live. God, he looks so good. But a frown slowly pulls at the corners of your lips as you notice a fleeting somnolence in the weight of his hanging eyelids. 

“Hey, baby.” Heeseung greets you affectionately while your heart flutters at the boyish grin on his face, but his raw, husky timbre sends the familiar signals to your throbbing clit that has been yearning for his touch. You squeeze your thighs together, suppressing the arousal that throbs unrelentingly in your bundle of nerves.

“Hi.” You reciprocate shyly with a small smile, your soft voice a mellow to his ears. His eyes darken, narrowing slightly at your bottom lip being tucked in between your teeth, prompting him to stifle a groan while his cock beneath the slacks hardened at the harmless action. Shit, not now. He mentally scolds his own cock. But God, he so badly wants to kiss your lips.

Oblivious to his struggle, you feel the guilt tugging at your heartstrings as you know that he must’ve been asleep before this, considering the timezone he is currently at, whereas it is still early for you to call it a night.

“I’m sorry. Did I wake you up?” You ask, your eyes turning crestfallen. You never want to be a clingy girlfriend, nor do you want to disappoint Heeseung in any way because you are aware of how much he appreciates you for being incredibly understanding of this aspect of his career, but this time, you couldn’t hold back any longer, needing him more than ever despite video calling him just yesterday.

Heeseung chuckles breathily as he runs his fingers through his hair, the sound being enough to make the butterflies swarm in your tummy. “Nah, you didn’t. I wasn’t even sleeping.” His attempt at reassuring you fails when he tries to stifle a yawn.

“You’re a bad liar.” You remark, eyeing him disapprovingly while the guilt is twisting painfully at your heartstrings. Maybe you shouldn’t have disturbed your boyfriend and allowed him to have some time of his own, considering he had to perform for the tour concert for two constructive days.

But little do you know that there is an entirely different reason why he looks a tad weary — he was jerking off to every deliciously sinful thought of the things he wanted to do to you before he took a nap — but you didn’t need to know that. Besides, despite being in a relationship for three years, the two of you have never once crossed the boundaries of being that level of sensual intimacy. Sure, he had sex with you every so often whenever he wasn’t needed at his line of work, but there has always been this unspoken boundary that the two of you never dared to cross for some reason. Maybe it has to do with you being incredibly shy when it comes to being more upfront about such salacious matters.

“Well, I couldn’t just ignore an incoming call from my gorgeous girl.” Heeseung casts you a smirk, knowing that you get all shy whenever he praises you, to which you always cover up with a rather cutieful scowl in his eyes. His features slowly soften as he seems to examine you, his eyes practically sparkling with a familiar adoration. “You look beautiful, sweetheart.”

You automatically scrunch up your nose, feeling dubious over his ever-flattering compliment. “What are you talking about? I’m only wearing my comfy home clothes.” You say as you look down at your attire. You’re only sporting a hoodie, his hoodie specifically, and elastic waistband shorts that reach way above your thighs. 

“I’m not talking about your clothes, baby. It’s your face. God, if only I get to wake up to this view every day.” You swear you are about to combust from his excessive compliments, and it doesn’t help that he is looking at you as though you are his whole universe. “I mean it when I say you look really beautiful. How did I ever get so lucky to have you in my life?”

“You’re being weirdly cheesy, Hee.” You huff, feigning indifference as you try to tame the butterflies swarming in your tummy, and yet you know that your boyfriend loves to shower you with compliments and affections, but this time, something feels different in the way he gazes at you. “Are you sure you’re not drunk?”

“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not.” He drawls playfully while adjusting to a different position that looks like he is resting his back against the headboard of the bed, one hand placed at the back of his head. “Just looking at your beautiful face is enough to make me feel drunk, and that’s saying a lot about you. My gorgeous girl.”

The warmth in your cheeks travels down to your neck. “Stop it, Hee.” You shoot him another scowl, a pathetic attempt that fails to tame the flutters all over you. 

“Oh, so I can’t compliment my girlfriend now?” He scoffs, his eyebrow raising just slightly before a pout slowly forms on his very kissable lips.

“Don’t pout. It’s not a good look on you at your grown age.” You tease him, breaking the character from your collected facade. You always did like being the one to tease him on rare occasions since he’s the one who does most of the teasing in your relationship.

“I can’t believe my girlfriend insulted me just when I was about to tell her I missed her.” He complains exasperatedly, but you overlook his usual theatrics as his last three words strike a chord deep inside of you. He continues to pout, oblivious to your silence of melancholy. “I’m hurt, sweetheart.”

“You missed me?” You finally ask quietly after a couple beats of silence, your tone sounding as though you are in disbelief that your own boyfriend, the guy who completely adores you, missed you. But this time, it hits differently and deeper that renders you out of breath for a moment.

Any playful mischief or humour dissipates from his countenance while his features soften. “Of course, I did, and I still do.” He reaffirms softly with a small smile unfurling his lips.

“I’ve missed you too.” You tell him after having to swallow the familiar painful lump in your throat, and you hope that he doesn’t notice the palpable tremor in your voice. You clear your throat, now adjusting yourself to get more comfortable on the sofa and curl at the corner with both your knees pressing to your chest. “So, wanna tell me about your day?”

“Nothing much. The boys and I had takeaway dinner in Jungwon’s room after I ended the Weverse live—“ Heeseung continues while you listen attentively; at least you try to because it’s hard to process his words into your brain when all you can think about is how much you miss him. You hum every once in a while to acknowledge him, your eyes focusing on his animated face, but your vision eventually gets blurry with each blink while your throat feels painfully constricted with the bundle of emotions threatening to implode. 

“The practices before the actual concert were tough, and it sucks how I needed my girl more than ever, but I’m miles apart from her.” Heeseung speaks out his frustration before realising that he is getting too carried away, but in the relationship, he’s the one doing most of the talking, whereas you would listen to him and gives your input politely whenever appropriate. He notices how unusually quiet you have gone and the way tears are welling in your waterline, alarming him. “Hey, you okay?”

“Mmhm.” You hum with your lips pressed thinly together, but there is a discernible crack in your voice. You muster a smile that feels painful, trying to maintain the facade you put up. “I’m glad that the tour went well in the end.”

“Sweetheart… you’re crying.” He points out gently, his eyes soften, and his lips downturn into a frown, watching as the teetering tears in your waterline finally cascade down your cheeks.

“I’m not.” You insist, using the end of your sleeves to wipe away the tears, a futile effort as they keep coming down like a waterfall. You hear him calling your name, but you are too absorbed by the whirlwind of emotions within you. An accidental sob leaves your lips as you still busily wipe the tears away. “I’m not crying.” You insist weakly, lacking the resolve to remain strong in his eyes.

“What’s wrong? Did you have a hard time at work?” Heeseung asks, fussing like a mother hen as his concern for you amplifies. Throughout the years of your relationship, you rarely ever showed him the vulnerable side of you, so to witness you breaking down hits him in the gut. He can only watch you helplessly on his phone screen as you continue to cry, his heart clenching painfully at the sound of your heartbreaking cries and sobs.

“You gotta let me know what’s wrong, baby. It’s hurting my heart to see you like this. Tell me, please?” He pleads, his fingers on his phone tightening as he feels useless and helpless that he isn’t there by your side to comfort you right now. He decides to wait patiently for you to become coherent again while offering you sweet nothings in a gentle tone.

Finally, you manage to calm yourself down, albeit hiccuping every now and then from going nearly hysterical over your emotions. “Work was fine. Everything’s fine. I just—“ You sniffle as you look away from him, your chest tightening with a familiar emotion. When you muster the courage to look at him again, your eyes turn glossy. “I just missed you. I miss you so much, and I need you.” 

Heeseung can feel his own heart breaking at the way you look at him with raw yet intense yearning. “Sweetheart—”

“I know I shouldn’t be like this when I promised that I’d be your most supportive and understanding girlfriend, but it keeps getting harder to be apart from you.” You finally pour out your pent-up emotions, letting him know earnestly without filtering your words. A hiccup leaves your lips, and it takes every ounce of strength in him to hold back an endearing smile as he finds you quite adorable with your slightly puffy eyes and lips. “You know that I’m happy and proud that you’re thriving in your career, but I can’t lie to you anymore when I say it hurts that you’re not here with me. It hurts to be apart from you constantly.” You close your mouth, realising how absurd you are being before looking down, ashamed of how you are acting on your emotions. “I’m being dramatic, aren’t I? I’m sorry, Heeseung.”

“No, sweetheart, don’t ever apologise for speaking out your feelings.” He says sternly, his tone compelling you to look into his eyes, but all you see is how they soften with assurance and reserved affection for you. “We promised each other that we’d be more open and communicate, right?”

You nod your head feebly at his reminder. “It’s just that I don’t want to disappoint you by being a clingy girlfriend who needs you by her side every day, and it’d be unrealistic because you’re a K-pop idol.” You mumble, and tears prick in your eyes again as you feel fear-stricken by your worst nightmare. “I don’t want you to leave me.”

“You could never disappoint me, baby. I don’t care if you want to be clingy with me or need my attention 24/7. You’re my girlfriend. I’d give you anything you want.” His words of assurance do little to allay the worst possible outcome that taunts you in your mind. “Besides, it’s going to take more than that for me to leave you, not that I would, ever.” 

But you remain avoidant with your head turned to the side as you hide your face in your arm, eliciting a soft yet patient sigh from him. “Look at me, baby. Let me take a look at your beautiful face, please.” He pleads softly, his tone mellow; you can’t help but be compelled. When your glossy eyes meet his, he gives you a warm smile, a smile that provides comfort over your distressed mind. “You’re okay, sweetheart. We’re okay. I’m not even mad or disappointed.”

This time, you believe him, his assurance putting your frazzled emotions at ease. Seeing how relaxed you are as you lean back against the sofa with your face devoid of any sign of distress, he feels at ease too, knowing that you are no longer in such an intense spiralling of your emotions. “You’re good now?” He asks for confirmation, his tone remaining a soft lull.

“Yeah.” You manage to utter quietly, no longer feeling dubious or embarrassed by the fact that you showed him your raw vulnerability, and instead, you feel closer to him in an unexplainable sense despite him being literally in another country at the moment.

Heeseung seems satisfied by your affirmation. “Let’s focus on you now, yeah? I wanna hear my girl talk about her day.” He says while there is an avid interest in his countenance, rendering you flattered.

You begin to fiddle with the hem of his hoodie subconsciously, hyperaware of his dark, mesmerising eyes being fixated on you in a way that feels intense. “I didn’t do much. Just resting and lazing around since today’s my day off from work.” You tell him, being careful with how you choose your words because he doesn’t need to know the exact truth.

A frown touches his lips. “You didn’t go out? Not even with your friends?” It’s weird because you would usually go out with your friends or do something productive on your off days, not saying that you're unproductive just staying at home. “You must’ve been bored staying at our home all day.”

“No, I wasn’t bored at all.” You counter, and yet you sound weak as the recollection of today plays on your mind while warmth weaves across your every vein. “I was busy with—” You immediately smack your lips shut, nearly revealing the truth to him.

Heeseung is intrigued, really intrigued, because he has never seen you being so meek like you are now. “Busy with?” His question is harmless, a genuine curiosity, but your mind resorts to producing such filth you want him to do with you — the kind of filth you have never done with him, nothing to the usual loving he always did with you.

“Doing stuff.” You mumble, your eyes purposely avoiding his confused ones, probably wondering what part of his question suddenly makes you avoidant, but this time, he can see that you’re flaring with diffidence.

“What kind of stuff?” Heeseung probes, and you know he will remain unrelenting unless you cave into his curiosity. The corner of your lips twitches up when he whines. “Come on. Tell me.”

“The kind of stuff that reminds me of you.” You utter each syllable slowly, but you decide to focus on his prominent Adam’s apple, which is one of your favourite parts of him, and fuck, you can imagine yourself rubbing your clit on it. 

For a moment, Heeseung doesn’t exactly comprehend your words, eliciting an annoyed huff from you, because there is no way your dirty-minded boyfriend does not understand the subtle implication. “Since I’ve been busy missing you too much, I played with the stuff that you bought for me.” You elaborate, your tone being carefully measured, and yet you can feel yourself weakening when a familiar suggestiveness shadows his once-softened features.

“Oh, yeah?” His voice a low rasp, igniting the heat flaring in your lower abdomen. The look in his eyes feels like a silent command as you find yourself slowly parting your legs as they hang over the edge of the sofa. “Did my baby have fun with it?”

You hum as you nod your head, his sultry voice making your clit throb. “Yes, but it wasn’t enough.” You say softly, but you can feel your breathing getting heavier.

“Of course, it wasn’t. It could never be compared to the real thing.” Heeseung smirks, his dark eyes scanning you intensely. He can see how needy you actually are behind this front of yours, and he knows that it won’t be too soon when you finally reveal to him. “My poor baby has been missing me too much — too much to the point that she’s craving my cock.”

You can physically feel your clit pulsating at his lewd words, and damn it, he’s right, because instantly, you drop all pretence, revealing what you have been keeping at bay. “Missed you so much, Hee.” You whimper, your cunt clenching at the smirk on his handsome face.

“I know, baby. You’re needy for me too, yeah?” He swallows down a groan, seeing the glossy look on your face. Maybe it’s because he’s feeling horny, but you look practically fuckable. This time, he doesn’t bother controlling his primal urges as his cock becomes a prominent bulge against his sweatpants.

You hum in an agreeing whine, the sound going straight into his cock. “Need you so badly, Seungie.” You mewl as you arch your back off the sofa while your hand travels down to your clothed cunt. “I need you and your cock to stuff me full.”

“Tell me more.” He demands, his jaw tightening with tension as he becomes intensely aroused by the sultry look on your face. “Tell me what you want me to do to you.”

“Things.” You nearly slur in the way you speak as your head spins at the palpable tension that you can feel even through the screen. You stroke your clothed cunt slowly, your fingers itching to remove your garment just to properly touch yourself. “Many things. The filthy kind.”

“You gotta be specific, sweetheart.” He chuckles lowly, his smirking countenance makes it seem like he’s degrading you, and fuck, you feel more turned on than you did before. It’s even better when throughout your sex life with him, he has never once degraded you in any way. “What sort of filth does my naughty girl want me to do to her?”

A needy whine escapes you, getting unbearably turned on as flashes of obscene scenarios appear in your mind while every inch of your skin feels hot. “Want your tongue on my pussy, lick and eat me out messily till I come, do it over and over again, and make me squirt.” You manage to utter such words without feeling any embarrassment, overshadowed by the pure need of your desire for the man beyond your reach. You let your head fall back to the sofa’s back, your eyelids weighing heavy with the lewd imagination playing in your head. “I want you to fuck me hard, fuck me with your cock till I break. Want you to use me as your cocksleeve every day. I need you to ruin me, Hee.”

“Fuck, baby.” Heeseung breathes out harshly, his eyes nearly rolling to the back at such lewd words leaving your once sweet-mouth. Never in his life has he ever heard you talking like that. His eyes flicker down at his very prominent bulge, feeling it painfully hard with incessant need before he directs his focus back on you through the screen. “You wanna be a good girl for me?”

The thought of pleasing him makes you eager, so you nod your head, eliciting a breathy chuckle from him at your enthusiasm. “I want you to grab the dildo I bought for you, and I want you to strip naked for me before you come back.” He instructs firmly, his dark eyes piercing into the screen as he stares at you, sending shivers through your heated body. “And position your phone where I can see every inch of you clearly, alright?”

You nod your head wordlessly in compliance and quickly toss your phone aside on the sofa before proceeding to rush for your room while the sound of your footsteps through the audio of his phone renders him amused at your obvious eagerness. 

Meanwhile, Heeseung decides to lower his sweatpants just enough for his cock to spring free, and damn, it looks angrier than it did just earlier. He is incredibly turned on that his cock remains hanging high, the ridges and veins protruding as a result of being neglected. He clenches his fist, restraining himself from touching his cock, not until you arrive. He closes his eyes as he leans his head back against the headboard, feeling quite surreal that this will be his first video call sex with you ever.

“Heeseung?” Your velvety voice prompts him to snap his eyes open before grabbing his phone at the side that he nearly fumbles with from the unbridled excitement. When he looks at his phone screen, he nearly drops it while his heart pumps harder at the lewd sight of your nudity fitting in the frame as you sit politely on the sofa with the pink dildo in your grasp.

Heeseung marvels at your nudity, his eyes hungrily feasting on every inch of your body, and he swears he can feel blood pumping in his cock as it hardens tighter than it did before. He smirks at the lingering diffidence in your countenance, being aware of his effect on you, even just by his mere gaze. He fucking loves it whenever you become shy all because of him.

“You look so damn beautiful, baby.” He is in complete awe, as though this is the first time you bare your nudity to him. Your clit throbs faintly as you observe the raw hunger in his eyes, his eyes roaming around your tits. You flush warmly at the sound of his low groan through the audio as he sees your perky nipples that look delicious enough to be devoured by his untamed mouth. “We’re going to do something new this time. Are you okay with it?”

“Yes.” You utter softly, earning you a small smile from him. You had placed your phone on the coffee table in front of you with your abandoned ceramic mug supporting your phone horizontally.

“I want you to put aside your dildo first.” He instructs, and you do so without tearing your gaze off his face. You can practically feel her fluttering in excitement as you observe his eyes trailing down to your closed legs. “Now show me your pretty pussy, baby.”

For a moment, you hesitate as it dawns on you that this is the first time you and your boyfriend will be engaged in this type of foreplay. But the encouragement he offers you with a soft, subtle head nod dispels any lingering doubts and embarrassment from you. You allow every muscle in your body to relax before slowly spreading your legs open, shoving down a needy whine in the back of your throat as the action causes your clit to throb incessantly.

You see the way his nose flares slightly just by the mere sight of your shaved mount, and with a daring spirit, you use your fingers to spread it open, revealing your already glistening folds to him. You feel grateful for how easily you can get wet just by the thought of your hot boyfriend.

“There she is. Fuck, she looks so soaked.” He groans as his cock visibly twitches at the explicit view of your pussy. He quickly recovers, wanting to give your needy pussy some attention as he leans his body slightly forward with interest. A grin smears across his lips, his eyes being solely fixated on your pussy. “Hi, princess. You’ve been missing me too much, haven’t you?”

“Heeseung.” Your humourless tone silently indicates your bafflement upon witnessing your boyfriend speaking and cooing to your pussy as though it is a person, and you can practically feel her preening under his overflowing affection. Yet, you can’t deny that there is something hot about this.

“Shhh. I’m still talking to her, baby.” Heeseung playfully admonishes you without meeting your gaze. He continues to entertain exposed pussy, adoration and lust blending in his eyes. “The dildo did not satisfy you enough, did it? You need my cock to keep you warm and full, nice and deep inside of you that you won’t even wanna let go of me.”

You can’t help but instinctively clench at his words. “Look at you, princess. I can see you clenching. It’s too bad that you are not stuffed with my cock right now.” He remarks in amazement, and yet the mockery belies his adoration is not lost on you as you find it undeniably hot. “You love it when I talk to you like this, hmm? Should I talk to my pretty princess like this once I get back?”

“Hee, please.” You plead, having had enough of his teasing, and you must be insane to even feel bits of jealousy that his attention is on your pussy instead of you, as though your pussy is not a part of you.

Heeseung chuckles softly as he is very much amused by your pouty attitude before deciding to cease his teasing, albeit he was very much serious when he was talking to your pussy. “Touch your clit for me, baby.” He finally directs his words to you, and you comply, the padding of your index and middle fingers now touching your clit that throbs under your own touch. “Now rub it nice and slow. That’s it.”

Your fingers continue to rub your button in a circular motion, nice and slow, just as he said. It does not take you a minute when you begin to feel the familiar sensation in your aroused little button as you continue to stimulate it.

Heeseung observes your reaction carefully, drinking in the pleasure that faintly contorts in your mesmerising features. His own hand goes straight to his neglected cock, hissing lowly as he uses the padding of his thumb to stroke the red slit in a repeated up-and-down motion, imagining how good it would feel if he were there with you to use the tip of his cock to rub your clit instead. 

“Does it feel good?” He asks in a slightly strained voice, already feeling sensitive under his own touch, his thumb continuously rubbing the slit in slow yet hard strokes, delaying the peak of his pleasure to arrive as he wants to see you come undone first.

You hum in response, still maintaining your composure as you are focused on rubbing your clit, but when you flicker your gaze to him, you bite down your lip upon seeing how he is evidently caught in a lustful haze, no doubt that he is touching himself. “But your fingers would feel better on it.” You whine softly.

Your words feed into his ego. “Of course, they would. I can easily make you cum just by rubbing your clit with my fingers, because your clit is so sensitive.” He says smugly with a smirk curling at his lips. “It’s actually so fucking adorable. Wonder how you’ll be once I get my tongue to touch your swollen little button instead.” 

“Fuck, Hee.” You moan softly as you arch to your own touch, your imagination going vividly wild — his tongue caressing and licking your clit relentlessly with such precision. 

“Look at you. Already falling apart.” He finds great delight in teasing you just by his lewd words that affect you more than he expected. “You wanna know what I would do just to your cute clit alone?”

“Tell me, please.” You keen, your fingers now rubbing your clit in fast motion, causing your back to arch off the sofa while you spread your legs even more, disregarding the limit to your flexibility. 

“I would rub it with my thumb, giving it a little tease before I go licking it, swirling my tongue slowly around your swollen clit—” He becomes distracted by the pleasurable sensation as he rubs the slit that is now glistening with his arousal. He recovers with a grunt, refocusing on you, and fuck, you look sinfully divine with your body arching to your touch while your tits are pushed out. “And then, I would suck it like how I suck your nipples, and maybe I’d smack your pussy before making you cum hard, repeating the same actions and overstimulating you just to listen to your cute whines till you cry.”

You’re imagining the delicious description of what he would do to you hard, and your building pleasure intensifies as your fingers stimulate your clit at full tilt. You control the moans spilling from your lips as you look at your phone screen. “I wanna see your cock.” You tell him in a demand, earning an eyebrow raised from him.

“What’s the magic word, sweetheart?” He asks in a playful drawl, his lips curving into a lazy grin as he enjoys how the expression on your face is bordering on such desperation.

“Please let me see your cock, daddy.” The syllable leaves your lips wantonly as you whine, and it feels absurdly natural to utter such a forbidden endearment to refer to your lover as. You catch a glimpse of a fleeting surprise in his face amidst your desperate, lustful haze before it is replaced by something so primal. “I missed your cock so much.”

“Yeah? You missed daddy’s cock?” Heeseung sounds more than on board with it, practically into it as he gazes at you hungrily while his voice sounds rough at the edges. You whimper out a ‘yes’ with glossy eyes, and that’s all it takes for him to cave into your request as he tilts his phone to the angle where you are greeted by his seven inches. “Look, baby. You got daddy so hard — it’s angry that it’s not inside of my pretty baby’s pussy or mouth right now.”

“S’unfair!” A sob leaves your lips while you pour your pent-up frustration into your fingers as they rub your swollen clit vigorously. “I’m so needy for you, daddy!” Your unabashed moans echo off the walls of your shared apartment with Heeseung, finally letting go of the last thread of your inhibition.

“I know, baby. It’s unfair that I’m not there to give you what you want right now, but daddy will make it up to you soon.” He coos, his features softening with the familiar affection before something dark shadows them, causing his eyes to darken dangerously. “Daddy will stuff you nice and full with his cock soon. I promise you.”

His firm promise is enough to quell the bitterness at the current circumstances that burns indignantly in your heart. You move your hips slightly in tandem to your vigorous fingers, feeling the imminent release that is teetering at the edge while your clit painfully throbs that serves as a warning. “Hee! I feel—"

Heeseung bites back a growl, feeling practically ravenous at the delicious sight of you losing yourself to your own touch as your mouth is partly open, silently moaning with your eyes rolling to the back. “Come for me.” On his command, you let go, your pussy fluttering with the mess of your release as you can feel it sliding down on your skin to your butt.

Heeseung hums lazily, watching you intently as you slump against the sofa while he continues to manipulate his now-wet slit in measured strokes. “Tired already, sweetheart?” He asks mockingly.

Something inside you gets triggered by his mocking, and you refuse to back down from the challenge that he benignly imposes on you. You shoot him a brief glare, defiance burning in your irises that has him smirking. “No.” 

“Good, because we’re not done yet.” His dark chuckles intensify the burning need in you. He looks down at your slick cunt, his tongue darting out to slide across his bottom lip. “Finger yourself. Need you to be prepped because I want to see you fucking yourself with that dildo.”

Your fingers feel like they have muscles of their own as they instinctively heed his command, now travelling down to your weeping cunt. Using your middle and ring fingers, you slowly insert them into your hole, cringing at the unfamiliarity of fingering yourself since you are used to Heeseung doing it for you with his long, slender fingers.

Still, you want to appease him, your fingers thrusting in and out steadily, but it just doesn’t feel right. “I missed your fingers in me.” You whine, your lips forming into a pout that you hope he would get the hint that you’re not into this despite the slick of arousal accumulating as it trickles down on your skin.

“Keep going, baby.” He orders sternly, eliciting more whines of protest from you, but he easily tames you with his dark, penetrating eyes, rendering you completely compliant. It baffles you how he looks collected as you can clearly see that he is rubbing the red tip of his cock. “Use your other fingers and spread your pretty pussy. I wanna see it.”

You hold back a whimper before obeying his command, your other fingers aiding your currently occupied fingers by using your index and middle fingers to finally spread your wet folds open, now giving him the raw obscenity of your fingers plunging into your sopping cunt.

“You’re so soaked, princess.” He comments, his voice a low husk that has your pussy fluttering again. Fuck, he’s so damn attractive in everything he does. “Close your eyes. Imagine that’s my fingers fucking you.”

You close your eyes and tilt your head to the back, your brows pulling together into a soft knit as you try to imagine his fingers fucking you instead of yours, and it’s working as you feel your hips moving in tandem with your fingers.

Heeseung nearly chokes on his saliva, completely mesmerised by the raw sensuality of you as you evidently lose yourself to your own touch. He desperately wants to engrave this moment on his mind, even better if he could record you and save it to his gallery. He stops rubbing his slit, only to begin pumping his cock.

“Look at you. Fucking yourself so desperately, but it isn’t enough, is it?” He sneers, feeling turned on that you seem to like when his words are bordering on mean as you moan in response. “You need daddy’s long fingers deep inside and curl them, fucking you fast and hard till you squirt.”

You fuck yourself harder with your fingers, trying to attain that familiar pleasurable sensation the way you did earlier, but it isn’t enough. “Please! I want your fingers so bad.” You sob out, your eyes seeking him as they plead desperately while the movement of your fingers nearly falters. “I can’t do it. I can’t make myself cum with my fingers alone, daddy.”

Heeseung can’t help but break character just slightly, his concern and affection for you slipping between the cracks. He even loses momentum in pumping his cock that remains hard for you. “But baby, you aren’t properly stretched.” His tone holds the familiar protectiveness.

“I can take it, daddy.” You reassure him after a needy sob leaves you. You look at him with doe-pleading eyes that you know he can’t resist. “Please?”

“Fine. Then take it like a good girl, yeah?” He smirks, resuming to pump his cock at an intensity that has the tip swollen and redder. “Grab that dildo and fuck yourself with it. Don’t forget to keep your legs spread open. Daddy wants to see your pretty pussy taking it.”

You quickly remove your fingers from your hole, eagerly grabbing the pink dildo despite the stickiness of your arousal on your fingers. You position the head of the dildo and align it to your hole before slowly pushing it inside, inch by inch. A gasp leaves your lips at the inevitable stretch of your walls, prompting you to halt halfway.

“What’s wrong? Can’t take it?” His mockery reignites the flame of defiance within you, but his dark eyes feel gradually intimidating, which renders you submissively whiny as you spread your legs further with your back arched. “Come on, baby. You fucked yourself with it earlier, so you can definitely make it fit. How is your cunt going to fit daddy’s cock?”

“I can.” You whimper, tears prickling in your eyes before you muster the courage to continue pushing the dildo into your cunt. The unrelenting stretch elicits more gasps from you, your breathing ragged. “I just need a minute.”

Heeseung is caught in a lustful haze as he zeros in on how your hole takes the dildo, imagining hard at the sensation of your velvety walls being stretched by his girth and eventually enveloping him. With a grunt, he begins to pump himself harder, wanting to test the limit of his endurance in prolonging his orgasm.

Finally, every inch of the dildo is now snuggled in your hole. “There we go. Good girl.” He purrs in satisfaction, making you preen. His dark eyes are heavily fixated on the dildo being stuffed in your dripping cunt. “Now fuck yourself with it. Thrust it into your needy cunt however you want.”

You let out a silent whimper as you begin to pull the dildo, only to push it back in, your walls having to be stretched by the girth, but you know that this is nothing compared to his real cock. You allow your head to rest on the sofa’s back, your chest heaving up and down as you imagine the ridges and veins of his cock grazing against your walls while he fucks you in slow, deep strokes. You moan softly as you increase the tempo of your hand manipulating the dildo into your dripping cunt.

You glance down at your phone screen, only to moan out at the pleasure contorting in his face as he fists his cock with his hand. “I watched some of your concert clips earlier.” You tell him breathlessly as he looks at you with an attractive eyebrow raised. “And you got me so wet, daddy.” You moan again, now reaching for your tits with your other hand, palming and fiddling with your nipples, which intensifies the building pleasure.

“Oh, yeah? Naughty girl.” He teases you, his eyes watching you playing with your tits that he had been dreaming of latching his lips to your suckable nipples. He pumps his angry cock harder, his mind running wild at the scenario — sucking your tits while he fucks you hard with his hips bruisingly snapping into yours. “Which ones are your favourites?” 

“Um—“ Your voice shakes at the instability of having to focus on his question, but the dildo that is fucking into your cunt right now feels good. “Teeth and Future Perfect performances.” You answer in a breathy moan, recalling how you felt when you were watching those clips of him.

You thrust the dildo faster and harder; the squelching sound of your wet cunt reaches your ears while he clenches his jaw at how wet you really are, pissed off that it’s not even his cock that is making you that wet.

“You looked so hot when you were performing those songs, the way you looked angry.” You tell him keenly, practically purring as you recall the intensity in his dark eyes that looked primal when he was performing and how he looked pissed off, making you wetter as you imagine the stuff you want him to do to you. “You should’ve felt how wet I was while I was watching those clips. Got me imagining how you’d fuck me angrily.”

Despite your sultry admission going straight into his hard cock, his eyebrows furrow with a tinge of concern plastered on his face, but he never relents from pumping his cock. “Baby, you know I would never fuck my anger into you.” The reserved softness in his tone elicits a whine of protest from you, needing him to be mean to you instead.

“But it’ll be so hot!” You moan out as you arch your back off the sofa before moving your hips sensually to meet the thrust of your dildo deeper. “I want you to fuck me mean till I’m a sobbing mess. You know you’d want that, daddy.” You purr, your sultry eyes gazing at him with a challenge while his cock twitches angrily at the thought. Fuck yeah, he’d want that. 

“Fuck.” He grits his teeth, faltering in his momentum as his head spins at the scenario of him fucking you ruthlessly till you beg for him to stop, till you cry and sob as he overstimulates you with his cock all night. “Yeah? You want daddy to be mean?” He nearly growls out his words while your cunt clenches around the dildo at the sound.

“Want it so much.” You whine needily as you palm your tits harder, getting crazily turned on as you watch him throw his head to the back with his Adam's apple bobbing up and down attractively while sweats trickle down his neck. “Want you to cuff my wrists and choke me while you fuck me hard. Want you to do mean things to me so badly.”

Your needy yet genuine admission has him reeling in the head. He feels like an animal, growling at the salacious thought of you being restrained to the bed while you take everything he gives to you like a good little fucktoy — nothing like the usual lovemaking. He groans huskily at the image of you in tears as you pathetically plead with him to stop despite your sopping cunt meeting his thrusts.

“I’ll do more than that.” He rasps, his tone darkening with promises that cause your clit to throb and your nipples to perk. When you meet his eyes, you whimper at the intensity that reminds you of those concert clips of him. “I promise you, baby, I’ll give you what you want once I come back.” A cruel smirk touches his lips, shocking you at the dark sensuality he emits. “You want me to be fucking mean while I fuck you senselessly? I’ll do just that. I’ll make you scream and cry while you take everything I give to your needy pussy. You’ll get mean Heeseung, alright.”

“Fuck, daddy!” You moan loudly, getting unbearably turned on by his dark promises as you thrust the dildo harder, hurtling yourself to the edge of ecstasy. You abandon your tits, only to stimulate your clit in fast, circular motion.

“We’ll go all night, never stopping till your needy pussy is leaking with my cum, till your pussy can’t fit any more of my cum, but I’ll make you swallow them.” He lets out a guttural moan as he pumps his cock furiously, his eyes rolling to the back at the height of his pleasure. “I’ll fuck you for days, keeping you satisfied and full till you can’t walk. I’ll fucking do it, because it’s daddy’s job to spoil his princess.”

“Yes, daddy! Want you to spoil his princess!” You’re not sure if you’re referring to yourself or your pussy, but you are deprived of coherency as you get lost in the dual sensation of your cunt and your clit being manipulated by your own hands. “I’m feeling close, Hee!”

“Don’t you dare come before me.” He warns in a growl, sending pleasurable shivers through you. You obey him, whining and moaning as you try your best to stave off your orgasm that is teetering, yet you are rubbing your clit skilfully fast. “Yeah, baby. Keep rubbing your clit for me like that. Cock feels good, hm?”

You hum in response with tears pricking in your eyes. “But not better than daddy’s cock.” You sob out pathetically, and that has him cooing at you with mockery. “Need daddy’s cock to satisfy my needy pussy.” But in the haze of lust, the familiar sentiments manage to grip you tight as your glossy eyes meet his. “I missed you so much, Hee.”

“I missed you too, sweetheart.” He softens up just slightly, seeing the familiar yearning in your pretty eyes. He clenches his jaw, pouring his pent-up emotions he hasn't conveyed to you just yet into pumping his cock while effectively stroking his thumb on his wet slit. “I’m never letting you go, ever. We’ll fuck every day once I get back, and I’ll breed you till you get pregnant with our kids. Daddy will take such good care of you.”

“Yes, yes! Breed me, daddy!” You keenly moan, your hips stuttering as you imagine he pumps his load into you to the brim, breeding you. 

“I’m gonna buy you a ring, and I’m gonna marry you, tying you to me forever.” He pours out what his heart has been yearning for. Despite the lust fogging his head, he looks at you with an intense yearning from the love he harbours for you, desperation contorting in his features fleetingly. “I’ll make you my wife.”

“Nngh! Hee!” You can feel it coming, your teetering orgasm on the brink of being released against your weakened will while the coil in your tummy threatens to snap at any moment. You fuck the dildo into you even faster, sobbing out. “I can’t hold back! I need to come, please!”

“Daddy will make you beg more too. You sound so fucking pretty when you do.” He groans, and with one last pump, his cock spurts out the white, sticky essence that now soaks his sweatpants. He breathes out harshly at the intensity of his own release before looking back at you, only to smirk at how obedient you are, waiting for his command with tears staining your cheeks, such desperation. “Alright, sweetheart, you can let go anytime for me.”

“Thank you, daddy.” Your moan tangles with your sob, and at once, your orgasm comes crashing down on you violently, leaving your legs trembling while you arch your back, your mouth parting with a silent moan as your cunt gushes out with your sticky release.

“That’s my perfect girl, making a mess all over.” He remarks with an unmistakable affection as he watches you with primal hunger, enjoying how ruined you look just from fucking yourself, but not nearly as ruined as he will make you once he returns.

Your heart flutters at his praise while you remain slumped against the sofa, allowing your limbs to rest as the exertion begins to dawn in every part of your muscles. Eventually, you force yourself to remove the dildo from your cunt slowly, whimpering as you do so as it grazes down against your walls. You eye the dildo that is covered by your sticky release before tossing it aside. You can feel how soaked the cushion is beneath you due to your release, but you can’t bring yourself to care.

You take a moment to recover while the sound of your boyfriend’s ragged breathing can be heard through the audio. The silence is familiarly comfortable, neither of you uttering a word to each other as you bask in the afterglow of your session. But some of the words he spoke to you in the midst of your lustful haze resonate deep in you. Your heart begins to pound harder while butterflies return in their wake.

“You okay, baby?” He asks softly, now being the sweet and gentle boyfriend that you’re in love with. He is still wiping off the excess of his release with tissues off his now-limp cock, but he grimaces at the apparent stain on his grey sweatpants.

“I’m okay.” You tell him reassuringly, your voice coming out small from the excessive whines and moans that bring your face to flush warmly at how wanton you were earlier. You lean forward, grimacing at the aches in your legs and the stickiness in between your thighs before grabbing your phone. Your eyes soften as he gazes at you. “Heeseung, did you mean what you said?” 

You refer to every word he spoke to you, needing assurance and affirmation from him; otherwise, you’d be overthinking at night. “I meant every word, sweetheart.” He says firmly, his tone lacing with promises.

You bite your inner cheek, feeling nervous about what you are about to ask. “Even about making me your wife?” You ask quietly, your eyes scanning his unreadable expression carefully. 

“Especially that.” His declaration sends a wave of emotions to you as your breath goes hitched in your throat. The raw vulnerability and yearning in his eyes are palpable, as though they are the reflection of your own sentiment. “I really feel the same way too, you know?”

Somehow, you have a strong inkling that he is referring to him missing you. You exhale softly before a small yet weak smile touches your lips. “I know, Hee—“

“No, baby, you don’t understand because I’ve been missing you too much, more than you missed me.” He cuts you off, taking you by complete surprise at the sheer desperation and pain that contorts in his handsome features, because you have never seen him being like this — as though the distance is killing him agonisingly on the inside too. “You’re on my mind constantly, even when I was practicing, and all I could think about is going home to you as soon as possible. I needed you, I still do.”

You try to find your voice, wanting to speak out, anything to ease your lover’s pain, but he continues to pour out the pent-up emotions he had been grappling with. “I hate to say it, but it got me thinking if my being an idol is even worth it if it means that I’d have to leave you again and again for tours.”

This time, something inside of you snaps. “Don’t say that, Hee. I never want it to reach a point where you find yourself in a position of choosing between me or your idol job.” You don’t mean to sound harsh, but you can’t allow it to happen, even if it means that you might lose him to his job. Your voice trembles as you speak again, tears welling in your waterline. “You love being an idol, you love your teammates, you love performing in front of your fans, and you must be crazy to think that I’d even allow you to choose me—“

“But I love you more.” Heeseung declares with vehemence while the devastation painting his handsome face tears a sob out of you. “Yes, I love being an idol, but it could never be compared to the weight of my love for you.”

“Heeseung.” You utter his name weakly as tears cascade down your cheeks freely. His declaration of love is all it takes for you to break down.

He watches you helplessly as you attempt to wipe your tears away. “God, I hate it when I’m not there to wipe your tears for you.” He whispers, his heart clenching painfully when your glossy eyes meet him.

“I’m sorry.” You mutter, hating how you are being overly sensitive and getting too carried away with your emotions. 

“No more apologies from you, baby, because I’m the one who should be apologising to you.” He says softly, yet firmly enough for you to grasp his sincerity.

“But you didn’t do anything wrong.” You counter weakly, sniffling. “You’re simply doing your job, and I’m just being a dramatic girlfriend.”

“I did you wrong by leaving your side when you needed me the most.” He says with a rueful smile. “You can expect a lot of apologies from me once I come back home, and a ring too.”

Your eyes widen in disbelief, earning you a chuckle from him. “What? You thought I was joking about buying you a ring?” He adorns a boyish grin that you so badly want to kiss him. “I did say that I’d be making you my wife. I’m a man of my words, sweetheart.”

“But it’s still early for us to get married!” You protest despite your heart thumping in agreement to his words. A frown tugs at your lips, determined to make him change his mind as you don’t want him to regret it. “I won’t allow marriage to get in the way of your job. Would your fans even accept the idea of us getting married?”

“Baby, you’re my future and my happiness. If the company wants to kick me out simply for marrying you, then so be it. I can always take over my dad’s business as a source of income. As for my fans, well, they’ll be happy for me — I’m sure they will, at least the real ones will.”

“I don’t know if I’m worth it for you to go through such lengths, Hee.” Your lips quiver, feeling dejected. “I don’t want you to throw away your years of hard work because of me. You went through so much just to get where you are now.”

“You are worth it, worth more than you think.” He says reassuringly, his tone sounding firm with conviction, but it does nothing to alleviate the thoughts he can see swirling in your head, eliciting a soft sigh from him. “If you’re still worried about my consideration in quitting my idol job, then I’ll figure things out and find ways so that I won’t have to leave your side again.”

“Promise me that you won’t quit.” You plead, your voice breaking as you feel immensely conflicted, because you can never deny a part of you that yearns for him to choose you. “I don’t want you to have any regrets if you had chosen that path.”

“Baby, I won’t have any regrets when it comes to you—”

“Just promise me, Heeseung.” You implore as your eyes glisten with unshed tears. “Promise me that you won’t quit because of me.” because of love.

Heeseung doesn’t respond as he examines your teary countenance, noticing how desperate you are and knowing that you won’t back down, even if he can feel your heart breaking. He resigns with a sigh. “I promise.” He hopes that he sounds convincing enough, because you are crazy to think that he would never choose you, but only for now, the idea of marriage is pushed to the back of his mind. 

You feel at ease despite your heartache, but you know that this is for the best for him. You sniffle again, earning an adoring grin from him. You avoid his eyes, a sudden diffidence cloaking you while your cheeks flush warmly. “Besides, how else will I be able to watch you perform on stage? I love watching you perform.”

“I know, baby, because I turn you on whenever I perform.” His mischief returns to his demeanour, a smirk unfurling on his lips while desire burns in his gaze. “What did you tell me earlier? Something about how I looked hot while I was performing Future Perfect and Teeth?”

You smile shyly as you nod your head, and God, he feels like he’s in love with you over and over again. “Mmhmm. You looked like you were angry, but I loved it. It got me all hot and bothered.” You tell him bluntly, oblivious to your words that rouse him.

“Fuck, baby, we should stop now.” He groans, repressing the arousal from reaching his cock. “I don’t think I could handle another round.”

“Right, you need sleep.” You say, pouting as you realise that he is supposed to be asleep right now.

“Don’t pout, sweetheart. I’ll be back before you know it.” He says reassuringly before his lips curve into a smirk again. “I hope you won’t forget what I promised you earlier, because we’re not done yet.”

“Hurry back, then.” You adorn a sultry smile on your lips, and the sensuality of you elicits a breathy cuss from him. “I expect you to ruin me once you return home, daddy.”

“Don’t worry, princess. You’ll get what you asked for. You’re gonna get it.”

You have never felt as anticipated as you are now, but the reality of him returning to you is in two long days. You let out a silent huff before eyeing your pink dildo. Guess that’ll work and keep you company for the next two days.

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[greaseonmymouth]

I don’t really want to wade into this discourse but I do want to point out that Josh and Tommy are vey very different people. I can very readily believe that because of who Josh is as a person Glee was more meaningful to him than Will & Grace - he probably wishes he’d had Glee as teenager, but he didn’t - he does get to have it now, though! He might even have obsessed about it, wishing for a better high school experience for himself! Assuming Josh and I are of similar age, Will & Grace and Queer Eye and Ellen were all on TV when he was a kid and Glee wasn’t a thing until he was already an adult in his twenties. Plus, Josh is trying to help Buck with something based on his own experiences because that’s what he’s got. He doesn’t know Tommy? He’s just extrapolating.

The show hasn’t tried to claim that before/after Glee is something that makes a difference for Tommy - that’s only something I’ve seen fandom wank about, and I do mean in general and not just this post - this post just happened to cross my dash at the right time for this addition. It made a difference for Josh. Benchmarks can be different for different people (as has been pointed out both here and elsewhere) and I wouldn’t dare try to claim that one is better than the other. For a show that oscillates between shallow and deep but is ultimately still just a pool…I would even dare say the Josh speech is spot on for his character and gives him more depth. We can infer a lot about Josh from it, and nothing about Tommy.

i do think “tommy was a legal adult when it became legal for gay people to have sex in the privacy of their own homes in all fifty states via supreme court decision which can be over turned at any time” would have been a better benchmark for the josh speech than glee but what do i know i’m just a person who isn’t interested in sucking ryan murphy’s dick

[lorenzozurzolocanruinmylife]

Mattheo’s girl -Theo Nott x reader/ Mattheo Riddle x reader

(Based on Rick Springfield’s song Jessie’s girl)

T.W.= smut, mdni, kind of stalkerish behavior, alcohol, cigarettes, hopefully that’s it

Mattheo is a friend

Yeah, I know, he's been a good friend of mine

But lately something's changed that ain't hard to define

Mattheo's got himself a girl and I want to make her mine

Theo stayed restless all night, turning right and round in his bed, he went outside to smoke at least 10 times. Something that has been happening for quite sometime, Theo could precisely pinpoint the day he started dealing with this type of struggle, one which he couldn’t seem to get rid of, no matter how hard he tried.

Actually, he could locate the exact place and moment in which things had changed, and his world had turned upside down.

10th of October, 2 months previously

The great hall was filled with noises, glasses clinking, first years snickering, professors chatting.Theo, Enzo, Pansy, Blaise, Draco and Astoria were already at the back of the Slytherin table, discussing their usual topics always adding some new aspects to it.

The only missing piece in their habitual frame was Mattheo Riddle.

The thing about that devilish boy was that nobody ever truly knew where he was or what was he doing.

Lately though, Theo, his very best friend, had notice a shift in his behavior. He found his mate even more mysterious than usual, if that was even possible. He was sly and vague anytime someone asked him anything.

Another thing that Theo seemed to have perceived was the way he came back late in the middle of the night, or how often he just didn’t come back.

Now, everybody knew Mattheo’s nature and the tendencies he had, rumor has it he has an outstanding count, body count obviously. He never denied said rumor, actually, he bashed in the pride that came along with it.

So it should have been normal really, but he never talked about his latest hookups, topic that he was extremely open about, in the quidditch’s changing room, as a fun story time at parties, hell even in class snickering right under Snape’s nose.

He collected those anecdotes mostly to narrate them in a crowd…and now…he just disappeared and came back, not speaking a single word, not indulging in any verdict his friends tried to state.

The only thing that talked were his eyes, and an unnoticeable glistening sparkle of something that Theo had never seen in those, usually starless, eyes.

In the middle of dinner, every single noise, was silenced by a far more powerful one.

The two huge door leaves opened, behind them Mattheo, who was so tall that he shielded you from everyone’s sight.

Until you took his hand in yours and started walking beside him, nearly skipping, looking completely devoted to each other, so much that you both didn’t remotely seem to notice everyone’s stare. He finally arrived at his normal spot, bringing you along.The noises came back to life but not to everybody, no, because Theo hadn’t heard even a single sound from the moment he laid his eyes on you. Let alone he couldn’t see anybody else, or understand anything.

“Guys, I want you all to meet the apple of my eye, my sweet lovely awesome girl. This is y/n, who I’m sure you’re gonna love just as much as I do” Mattheo couldn’t understand how much this last statement would become true. While he showed you off, his eyes filled with thousands of those damn sparkles, Theo started to feel the need to hold you.

And she's watching him with those eyes

But how could he do that if you were so absorbed in Mattheo, focusing on him, and only him.

Theo never knew envy, and he never even remotely thought how gut wrenching it could feel, until that moment; that horrifying split second, that for some reason couldn’t seem to pass.

“Nice to meet you! I’m y/n, you must be Theo? I’ve heard a lot about you” you outstretched your hand towards a very unresponsive Theo.

You knew who he was. That was enough gasoline to light up an immense fire in his chest, so vast that it reached his throat, making him cough, and finally his face…painting him red.

He couldn’t tell if it was more passion or embarrassment he was enduring, but he knew he was crumbling under your beautiful gaze, nonetheless he couldn’t stop this absolutely awkward scene, because of how little and weak he felt.

He took your hand.

He looked up at you.

“I’m sorry- it- it’s just I never thought I could ever meet Mattheo’s girl…never even thought he could have just one” he whispered the last part, you seemed to have heard it though and you laughed, surprisingly.

In that instant- you drying your tears caused by the loud heartfelt laugh, him gaping at your smile, feeling an incredible uncontrollable high because he made you laugh- he knew ha was at your mercy.

Pathetic and lost in you.

Time passed and you started becoming a constant presence in the group, this was driving Theo mad, because he needed to be near you just as much as he wished to be as far away from you as possible.

He was starting to doubt his morals, because anytime he saw you, the feeling he was harboring in his chest- involuntarily- was becoming more and more voluntary. Not only this, but he cared less and less about his best friend, and the fact that you were his.

In fact Theo was convinced that if he had the chance to take you away from Mattheo he would, he desperately wanted to make you his. No matter how traitorous he’d have to be. The only thing that stopped him was you.

And she's loving him with that body, I just know it

Yeah, and he's holding her in his arms late, late at night

You were in love with Mattheo.

Just as much as he loved you.

Just as much as Theo loved you.

You loved him in the daylight, when anyone could see it, walking with him hand in hand, always sitting next to each other -Theo thought that at least it was better than to see you sitting ON him-

always exchanging notes, winks, flying kisses and so much more.

But he knew you loved him in the moonlight, where no one could see.

You loved him with your body.

He just knew it…

31st of October

The Slytherins were organizing a Halloween party, that was one of the most awaited every year.

You were in Mattheo’s dorm, laid down on him, facing him lazily while sharing some light kisses. You decided to go at the party in a couple’s costume, as if you hadn’t launched your relationship enough -thought Theo, who would have done anything to go with you, even if it meant dressing up in the most ridiculous way ever.

As soon as Theo entered the room, followed suit by Enzo, he felt as if the scene unfolding before him was stolen directly from his nightmares.

He craved your touch, your faint kisses, your arms around his neck and your sweet words, just as much as he needed to throw up right there and then.

Enzo peeked over Theo’s shoulder as he was standing still paralyzed by the envy tugging at his heart, and mostly clouding his mind. He gave his friend a little push, “move your perv ass Theo, I need to pee” and just then he realized Mattheo was glaring at him because of his blatant stare, so he coughed and immediately threw himself on his bed.

Mattheo turned his glare towards him again, protectively holding you twice as close as before. It was no secret that he was jealous of anyone who simply looked in your way, how could he not? You were attractive in a way that was far more than just physical, your whole self had a pull on every single person you met, you were irresistible. That’s probably why his friends, who were the most selective and elitist group of people in the whole school not only accepted you as one of their own, but also requested your presence the very few times you weren’t around.

Theo heard some of the suggestions you two were debating for the costumes, imagining him and you in each of them.

He started to feel hot as the options were becoming doubly spicier than the other.

He had to get out of there.

The party had already started when you guys showed up, you were gorgeous, dressed in a long white dress that had a pretty deep neckline, and where your heart was supposed to be there was a knife with fake blood all over. You had a white veil too, while Mattheo was wearing a tux with red handprints on the shirt.

It was sickening really, you were a bride, and he was your goddamn husband. Theo who was already holding a drink downed it as fast as he could. Trying to get that horrible image out of his mind.

As you reached the group everyone was complimenting you both, “you’re the it couple” “you guys look so good as husband and wife!!!” Pansy and Astoria yelled. They stole you away from your fake husband to dance and take far too many shots. Which still weren’t half the ones that Theo drank, in fact he could hardly stand on his two feet.

He returned to the group, and he thanked whoever was helping him from above that you weren’t there, because in the state in which he was he would have definitely poured his feelings out, and possibly even a mix of the cocktails he downed.

“Man I’ve never seen you so whipped for any girl- actually I may have never seen you even interested in any girl. Y/n has some super power” Blaise said teasingly to Mattheo, who was looking out for you from a distance just to know you were safe, and also because he was entirely too stunned by your beauty. “What can I say? I knew from the very first second I’ve looked at her that she was the one, she doesn’t remind me of any other girl that I’ve met, I don’t think I could find another one like that” “And also, look at her” Enzo chimes in raising his eyebrows, earning a push and a chuckle from Mattheo.

Theo was sat on the sofa, his head in his hands, thinking that it was better if he just kept silent and even better if he didn’t spare you one glance.

As the party went on he watched as you and Mattheo were tangled in a hot embrace while dancing, touching each other and basically humping to the rhythm of the music. He suddenly grabbed a girl that was dancing in front of him, with his eyes wide shut he started to imagine it was you dancing, it was you pressed tightly against him, it was you kissing him and it was you he was leading to his dorm.

He was about to stumble in with the mystery girl, the actress, until he heard some loud noises.

He broke away from her, telling her to stay quiet, while he slowly leaned towards the door hearing the most heavenly gasps and moans he ever heard. He turned back to the girl and while she tried to imply to go back to her dorm, he ignored her turning back once more.

Obviously she wasn’t expecting this, and left as disappointed as Theo had never left another girl before. But he couldn’t stop himself from wanting to hear more, to fuel his fantasy, giving it something concrete, starting somewhere real to land in his most incredibly feral imaginations. He leaned a bit more on the door and it opened slightly, he was relieved that it didn’t make any noise, and most importantly he was ecstatic that he got to sneak the sight he had been dreaming about since the day he first saw you.

He didn’t care that this was clearly a violation of your privacy, he couldn’t bring himself to look away.

The image of you on top of his best friend, bouncing on him, small drops of sweet sweet sweat running down the valley of your perfect round tits that went up and down with your every move. He was enchanted by it all, this was something that he had dreamt and imagined countless times, but nothing compared to the real deal.

He gave up trying to not touch himself, and he started to unbutton his pants hurriedly reaching his hardened dick and as you came closer and closer to your climax so did he. He didn’t feel shame, he felt closer to her, as if his hands were the ones grabbing her, his body the one loving her, his cock the one pleasing her.

When he came undone, he stepped away from the doorway, muttering “I wish that I had Mattheo’s girl”, passing a resigned hand over his face.

The next morning he felt outrageously ill, inflamed with an unadulterated jealousy seeing your naked form, covered with the white sheets of his best friend’s bed, but mostly covered by his best friend’s embrace. He just couldn’t wrap his head around how unfair was the fact that the bastard could wake up to your beautiful goddess like body in his arms, his face next to your angelic one. He should have been the one, he should have been the one having you.

You know, I wish that I had

Mattheo's girl

I wish that I had Mattheo's girl

Where can I find a woman like that?

Theo in an attempt to be rational had decided to give other girls a try, certainly he would find what he saw in you in someone else, right?

Wrong!

He couldn’t keep count of how many boring chats, meaningless one night stands, and dates he had endured trying to find someone like you.

He definitely remembered when that realization hit, that simply no one could compare.

Double date, Hogsmeade, Theo, girl n.17, Mattheo, you. Splendidly suggested by his very best mate in question.

12th of November

Just like any other Saturday a trip to Hogsmeade was planned, and the group of boys were all getting ready in their shared dorm.

“Guys which should I wear for my date with y/n? Green or grey?” Mattheo asked turning toward the others holding up two sweaters. “Dude whatever, it’s not like it’s your first date” Draco answered him annoyed with his friend that couldn’t for the life of him spend some time alone with his friends anymore, Theo couldn’t blame him though. He knew that if he ever had someone like you, he too would exploit every single second to be around you, not wasting anytime with anyone else. Exactly the opposite of what his plans were for this not-so-exciting evening. “I heard someone else here is going on a first date? Or should I say hundredth, huh lover boy?” Enzo raised his eyebrows mimicking a kiss aimed at Theo, who threw him a pillow to shut him up. “Yeah mate what’s up with this slut era of yours? You’re trying to catch an std or sum?” Blaise asked him giving him a nasty side eye “I just give the ladies some sugar, you know, there’s enough for everyone” Theo smirked, trying to conceal his cringed reaction to what he had just said. And mostly trying to hide the unbearable truth, that you were no some girl. You were Y/n, unique, funny, charming, genuine, his sweet forbidden fruit.

He tuned the guys out, not caring in the least of what they had to say about his unconventional DonGiovanni’s lifestyle, to think about you just like he always did. What brought him back to reality was the same thing that took him away in the first place. Y/n. As soon as he heard your name his head shot up, his stare that was lost on the wall in front of him focused once more on his friends.

“Huh?” “Why don’t you and your girl hang with us? Like a double date?” Mattheo suggested finally having settled on the grey sweater, “Why?” Theo let that out with a baffled expression, doubting this could ever be a good idea. He himself knew that he wouldn’t have resisted being in the same room with Mattheo always touching and kissing you. And he definitely knew that the poor girl he brought along would be discarded the very instant that his eyes found you, because wherever you were so was his undivided attention.

But then he thought again, still convinced that he could find a replacement for you, someone else that could steal his heart from you after you had done that to him yourself. He thought that the best way to know if this girl could take your place was for her to show him, with you there, that she was a fair opponent. As Mattheo rambled about giving him an example of what true love should look like and yada yada, Theo just shrugged and agreed.

In hindsight he couldn’t have been more wrong, or maybe he was right, when he had first thought that the girl would have been discarded, and that he wouldn’t have notice any other person as long as you were there.

But there he was, sat at a very small table at madam Puddifoot’s tea shop, regretting his every choice, with a very plain and awkward ravenclaw girl by his side, and in front of him the awfully cutesy couple seemingly having a staring contest.

The poor girl, Vic or something, was trying to make small talk and each time Theo just mumbled something in return. You on the other hand were always so nice and entertaining, not wanting her to feel left out you talked about every possible topic.

I'll play along with the charade

There doesn't seem to be a reason to change

You know, I feel so dirty when they start talking cute

I wanna tell her that I love her, but the point is probably moot.

But even though he knew it didn’t make sense, none of it made sense, him being there, him being there with that girl, he decided to just keep up with whatever this seemed to be. So for the rest of the evening he tried to be as charming as one should be on a first date, subtly trying to make you laugh more than he made her, and more than Mattheo made you. Being slightly arrogant about his advanced potions’ skills, his good grades, his quidditch wins and this sort of things.

And despite his real attempt to woo the girl just for the façade’s sake, as if for some cruel divine joke he seemed to have way more chemistry with you. Indeed you laughed at his stupid jokes, you didn’t stand back on an exchange of witty and cunning banter, and at one point you even completed one of his sentences. He felt like he was going to die if he had to keep faking this misplaced interest for just one second longer, until he looked at you, really looked at you. Nearly fused with Mattheo, holding one of his hands while his other was under your sweater. Exchanging sweet nothings at the same time you were talking to him. And Theo, who wasn’t a stranger to this scene, still felt like he was about to crash out, blinded by the infamous green eyed monster, and just like on the night of Halloween he felt dirty. This was one of those epiphanic moments in which he regained lucidity, disgusted with his behavior.

He did truly feel like shit. How could he not? His best friend’s girl? It was seriously the least loyal thing that he could think of, it was the first rule of bro code. Goddamn, it was a commandment.

But he loved you. His heart ached for you, every smile you directed to him, every word, every nod, every acknowledgment from you got him completely drunk.

And in these very rare lucid moments he felt ashamed, a sinner. Besides, most of the time it all felt right, it was right to be selfish, it made sense, just like it would have if he finally told you. Because there was nothing that he wanted more than to break free from the heavy chains of this secret and confess.

In those few, clear moments, he sobered up, and kept realizing that it would have been irrational and mostly vain. Because you loved Mattheo. And he couldn’t do anything to stop that.

Cause she's watching him with those eyes

And she's loving him with that body, I just know it

And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night

You know, I wish that I had

Mattheo’s girl.

The date ended, and so did Theo’s hopes on encountering someone like you. And with them died also the dreams of a reciprocation of his feelings. Just like they did every damn time he saw your shiny eyes looking at his best mate. There was no point. He could just surrender to his impossible love and move on eventually, while having to stand there and watch every kiss, every lingering touch, every form of pda the world knew.

He found peace only at night, when he dreamt of you and him together, doing all the things he had seen you do with him.

And I'm looking in the mirror all the time

Wonderin' what she don't see in me

I've been funny, I've been cool with the lines

Ain't that the way love's supposed to be?

Tell me, where can I find a woman like that?

You know, I wish that I had

Mattheo's girl

What Theo really just didn’t understand was what could he possibly have less than him, people had always told them how similar they were, did Mattheo become all of a sudden the better version? No, impossible. Theo searched for the answers in the mirror, trying to think of what he didn’t have that Matt did. Sure, he was more muscular, but that had never meant that he wasn’t just as strong.

Was his personality the problem? It couldn’t! No, because whenever you spoke to each other you seemed so at ease, you seemed like you were aware of the flick of fire that lit between the two of you.

24th of November

Theo had just come back from the library to his dorm, thinking he’d be alone, he dived on his messy unmade bed hoping to rest his poor head filled with tangled thoughts that were all screaming your name.

“Rough day?” he gasped, nearly falling out of the bed “Oh dear Merlin, you scared me” he said holding his chest with one hand, and his forehead with the other one. “Scared of a little company, aren’t you Theo?” “You don’t know just how much” he answered you completely honest, though you didn’t know he wasn’t joking.

“So w- what are you doing here? Waiting for Mattheo?” he asked, truly regretting the last part, and having to say it out loud. “Not really, but since he gave me the password to the common room, I figured why not?” “So you do spend time apart? I wasn’t aware” he faked a surprised expression and made you laugh “Well, you know sometimes it all just feels like a lot, I mean…” you tried to make sense without sounding mean “are you trying to say that he’s too much?”. “No, no please Theo, come on I didn’t mean it like that” Theo was snickering, feeling somewhat relieved that it was too much even for you. “You know what I mean, like I love him, truly” you said and Theo’s smile faltered for a beat, then came back normal as if his heart hadn’t just been wounded by what you said to him. “But we just might spend too much time together, and like I said, I love him but I love my own personal space too”. “Well i don’t blame him” he said “it’s easy to get lost in time when you’re with someone like you” he let out this risky statement testing you, trying to see your reaction. Your cheeks welcomed a burning pink tint on them, and you looked down at your feet lightly smiling “Someone like me?” you looked back up at him with a challenging glance “yeah, someone effortlessly fun” “and what else?” “I’m sorry I can’t come up with another lie” he said smirking at you. You suddenly got up to your feet, went up to him and pushed him. “Fuck off Theo” you told him laughing “Someone who can take a joke definitely” he said trying to keep his cool after feeling your touch, “Ah, ah, ah. And here I was thinking you liked me!” you feigned an insulted face “I don’t like you…” he said seriously now. You stood there still, in front of him, the heat returned to hit you in your face.

That was it. He knew and he firmly believed you knew it too. He was gonna say it, he extended his arm and gently took your hand “No, I-“ “Y/n babe are you in here?”. You took back your hand, and went to your boyfriend as fast as you could.

-Of course- Theo thought to himself, who else could interrupt his one chance to finally tell you, if not your stupid boyfriend. “Oh dude hi, kept her company I hope?” “Yeah well I was just about to leave, bye Matt” and then he looked at you, who were now in his friend’s arms, like every damn time. Your eyes met his “bye y/n”.

His cards were now on the table, and maybe for this reason or for his undeniable guilt, that was the last thing he had told you. The feelings were still there, but so were yours, even if he genuinely had believed that he saw something in your eyes in that moment.

The truth was that there was something, there were those sparkles, the same Mattheo had when watching you. You just couldn’t admit it out loud, and now Theo had started to completely ignore you, so there was no point in trying to understand what was that you felt, no because you were always Mattheo’s girl.

[oh-phoenixx]

"Smoke"/"Change" - Jegulus microfic @into-the-jeggyverse - 523 words

-

Regulus’s first Christmas at the Potters’ was not all that Sirius had made it out to be. Yes, they were kind and generous, yes, it was everything that he and his brother had dreamed of when they were little. But it was too much. It was too perfect. It was too good for him. 

At the moment, Regulus, Sirius, James, and James’s parents were sitting in the living room, drinking hot chocolate and watching muggle Christmas movies. 

“I’m going out for a smoke,” Regulus mumbled to his brother. He went into the hall and grabbed the cigarettes and the lighter from his jacket, and then stepped outside. 

He was leaning back against the wall, cigarette in hand, when the front door opened beside him. He had expected it to be Sirius, or maybe Fleamont, who had talked to him a few times and was actually quite easy to confide in. He hid the cigarette for a moment in case it was Fleamont, but instead, James came out and shut the door behind him. 

“Those things will kill you, you know?” He observed, like the genius he was.

“Really? I hadn’t heard,” Regulus muttered, taking another drag.

“Sirius smokes, too. I’ve tried to get him to stop, and Remus. You’re all hopeless,” James scoffed, though his tone was playful. 

Regulus didn’t say anything in response. He didn’t know why James was out here. Frankly, he didn’t care. He wished he was made for this type of thing, for Christmas and joy and a decent home. But he wasn’t, this wasn’t his life.

“I know it’s a lot,” James mumbled, his tone almost nervous now. “We’re a lot. It’s okay if it’s overwhelming for you. My parents won’t be angry if you need a break from it all.”

“What do you care what I need?” Regulus replied, glaring through tear-filled eyes, though at his feet so that James couldn’t tell.

“I care. I care a lot, actually. More than you let yourself believe, I imagine.” James was facing him fully, his shoulder against the wall and his gaze so fixed on him that Regulus could practically feel the weight of it. “Sirius might’ve acted like being here was heaven just to get you to stay with us, but it wasn’t easy for him, either. He didn’t feel like he deserved it. He was worried every second that our love for him was conditional, and at some point we would just…snap. Hurt him. It’s okay if that’s how you feel.”

“I’m fine,” Regulus bit. “It’s just too fucking bright and loud and- I don’t know what’s wrong with me, okay?”

“That’s okay, too. You’ll figure it out as you go. You don’t have to change yourself for your home anymore, Reg. We’ll change for you. We just want you to be comfortable.”

Something about the way he said this softened Regulus. By then, he had finished his cigarette. He dropped it and ground it under his shoe. When he looked back to James, soft hazel eyes met his, and he could have melted.

Maybe Regulus didn’t need to go back to Grimmauld Place for the summer.

[beans-in-your-socks]

bkdk would be canon if izuku was a girl.

“WOOOOW VEE!! Starting off strong with such a bold statement!!” I hear you, ok but wait. I have reasoning to back me up.

bkdk would be canon, or, at least less hated on if Izuku was a girl. And A Silent Voice is proof of that.

now if you have no idea what I’m talking about go and watch that movie it is beautiful and will change your life but let me continue.

throughout the first arc of A Silent Voice Shouya bullies Shoko. Very harshly as well, doing things such as ripping out her hearing aids causing her to bleed, making nasty comments behind her back and to her face and generally just being an ableist bitch. Starting to see the parallels? In season 1 of MHA we can see how Bakugou Bullies Izuku because he is quirkless, which I guess in a way is the MHA universe’s equivalent of having a physical disability.

throughout ASV we follow Shouya’s journey of making amends with Shoko and, despite their history, Shoko catches feelings, confessing to him towards the middle of the movie saying “I love you” which Shouya mistakenly hears as “I love the moon”.

obviously what Shouya did in the first part of the movie was horrific and should not be condoned, but he took that time to improve and better himself and show Shoko that he was sorry and that he cared.

again, seeing the parallels? In MHA bakugou actively tries to improve himself and make ammends, after realising his actions were very wrong and trying to unpack his inferiority complex (because that is what led him to do a lot of what he did, as we see in season 3 ep deku vs kachan pt.2) he wants Izuku to know that he’s sorry and that he cares, he even says this to all might, and this is how we eventually reach, The ApologyTM, in season 6. Again as we see, Izuku forgives him and comes back to AU.

now, back to my original statement. Shokoxshouya is a very popular ship in the ASV fandom and is implied to be canon, especially seeing how Shoko canonically likes Shouya. I’ve never actually seen anyone hate on them, loads of people saying that they’re “made for each other” and the like. now ofc again, Bkdk is a very popular ship in the MHA fandom but somehow is also the most hated. This is partially attributed to SOME shippers being weird asf such as pixeldrink but every ship has those people (unfortunately) people just tend to bring more attention to it when it comes to bkdk cause ppl need an excuse to hate. But another driving factor of the hate? This idea that the ship is toxic because of the events of s1. “ but bakugou told Izuku to swan dive ☹️” babes that was seven seasons ago and he’s come A LONG WAY since. Bakugou is probably one of the best and most interestingly developed characters in the whole series. (Also apparently horikoshi said he felt the line was too far and ooc for bakugou? This might just be a rumour tho idk)

now here, ASV boy bullies a deaf girl, makes an effort to be better, becomes her friend, shows her he cares and saves her life. MHA a boy bullies a quirkless boy, makes an effort to be better, becomes his rival then his friend, saves his life AND ALSO SACRIFICES HIMSELF FOR HIM!!

the only major difference here?

they’re both boys.

and unfortunately, at the end of the day, it all boils down to homophobia. I constantly see comments saying “can’t two guys just be friends” and “NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE GAY” and “why’d they make it woke” etc. people will find anything to try and cover the fact that they’re literally just a gross homophobe. And unfortunately, majority of the time, these comments are coming from izucha shippers, who, I’m sorry to say, are some of the most INSUFFERABLE shippers I have ever come across. Some of them are really nice but a bunch of them are just homophobic cis-het dudes who have absolutely no passion behind the ship and just ship it cause it’s implied and cause it’s hetero. And the whole using chapter 431 as a GOTCHA to Bkdk shippers is just so annoying and immature. Same goes for ppl using chapter 431 as an excuse to be lesbophobic to togachako shippers. THIS DOES NOT GO FOR ALL OF THEM!! Some of them are genuinely really sweet and have passion for the ship which is what shipping is supposed to be about!! But unfortunately a lot of them are really shallow :(

anyways yeah that’s why I think it’s dumb that people are so hypocritical when it comes to Bkdk when shouyashoko is praised as a perfect dynamic, when BOTH are flawed! But that doesn’t make them toxic. Contrary to popular belief, people do have the ability to grow and fix their mistakes. There’s a massive double standard and it ticks me off.

(Also wasn’t Bkdk supposed to be canon in horikoshis prototype of MHA? Or at least once sided cause Bakugou was supposed to be obsessed with Izuku? Which would’ve been a really interesting dynamic to explore. Not necessarily a healthy one, but interesting.)

anyway I’ll sign off now cause it’s 11 pm and I just needed to get that rant out

[timefall-if]

Hi I just realized this is my first ask EVER but please please I need R crumbs(M is my obsession but R is a close 2nd) So like pre-FWB (maybe this causes the agreement to happen) but R smuggles in something for MC’s job and deals with a snarky MC who for some reason won’t just say thank you, but also can’t pay them the amount that R wants (I put so much thought into this buckle up)

If medic - obviously medical supplies

If street artist - spray paint (or mask to keep fumes away)

- if inventor - a part really needed for an invention

- if singer - TEA OR COUGH DROPS omg the voice is a fragile instrument

- if fighter - drugs. No im kidding, material to wrap their hands or like a muscle relaxing herb or smth (can you tell I struggled with this one)

You single-handedly along with the thousands of arcane edits I’ve seen have convinced me to sit down and finally watch the show (after my finals are done you will see more of me). The prologue is amazing and I’m in love already never lose your passion you’re great! ❤️

hi, thanks for the ask ^^ i'm so glad you asked about R! and wow, it's like you looked through my notes for them haha,,

remember this M x medic!MC scenario i wrote recently? somewhere in there, M asks MC how they got all the stuff to tend to their wounds so quickly, and MC said that "Marek knows someone".

that someone is, of course, R heh. MC hasn't met R yet but Marek works with R a lot to get things he needs for M and MC. like you said, for medic!MC for example, R gets Marek medical supplies, Marek pays, then he gives them to MC. though Marek is quite fond of R, he doesn't really want them to meddle with MC, just because R does some pretty dangerous and reckless stuff sometimes to get what they need, and Marek doesn't want MC to get roped into things like that. so he's tried his best over the years to make sure they don't meet!

(also pls tell me what you think of Arcane once you watch it, and thank you so much for the sweet words!💗)

[megapteraurelia]

wildflower — your first time skipping practice.

summary | delinquent!reader having to join karasuno's volleyball club and— ugh, did she really have to? warnings | cursing, smoking, (emotional pain) word count | 3568. a/n | hii! this is part two of female delinquent!reader (though, i might change this from super delinquent to just angered-and-hurt-teen!reader) please let me know what you think! -` ♡ ´-

You had to give one thing to the volleyball club: it worked perfectly as background noise for you to kick back and fall asleep to. 

You were holed up on the second floor, back leaning against the railing, eyes closed and ready to get taken into a faraway land, deep in your slumbers. Balls bounced off the floor; a dull sound compared to the bright clap when they met hands, and it worked like clockwork, one after the other, like a metronome.  

The coach yelled some instructions, a couple of “Nice receive!” and “Nice serve!” ringing out, but their voices seemed far away as you longed to dip your head in water and lose yourself in the rustle of liquid, holding your breath; the need and desire rising within you to claim your air, to claim your life, to consciously choose, each and every time, to return to the world of the living. 

Yells of joy chimed through the hall, interrupting the sounds of idle playing your mind had grown used to, and you cracked one eye open. Drawing your attention immediately was the orange-haired pipsqueak, jumping up and down, his form nearly vibrating with excitement. Hinata Shōyō was as annoying as a little mosquito, buzzing around with far more energy than should be legal, and so loud. For somebody like you, who liked to have downtime, he was as close to a curse upon your conscience as possible. 

And, like clockwork —

“Hinata! What are you so excited about, idiot?! You better not prove to me that this was just a fluke on your part, so come back down, loser — “

“ — it was no fluke!! I’ll show you, Kageya — “

Yep. 

Once one of the idiots got fired up, that seemed to light up an entire blaze underneath the other’s ass, and it was like a compulsory scratch they couldn’t stop itching. The worst thing was that it wasn’t just those two, who kept going. Usually, they were pretty easy to ignore once one got accustomed to the new volume gauge they set every time, so you glanced over the whole field and deliberately sent a rather mean glare to Azumane Asahi. He wasn’t looking at you, but you could recognise the weird way his shoulders twitched as a shiver ran down his back. 

You snickered quietly to yourself because scaring this huge of a young man was never not gonna be funny, before closing your eyes again to settle back. 

Except, here came the reminder why you could never catch more than 15 minutes of nap time at once whenever you had to attend this stupid club.

Sadly, amongst the entirety of the team, there were two other idiots, who managed to be just as loud and excitable and interrupted the workings of your inner mind once it tuned out the weird first-years. You didn’t even want to know what they were doing, though you could guess that it had a lot of ‘fooling around’ in the name. Their voices though, much to your demise, were still loud enough to carry to you. Damn it, even though you chose the most far-away place in this gymnasium to waste time at.

“Noya! Watch this!”

“Wooooaaaaaahh, Ryū, that’s so cool! You look like a superhero!! Wait, look, I’ve also been working on my newest move — “

Deliberately trying to tune out the voices, you once again tried to lean against the bars to sink into some formless version of daydreaming. For a bit, it worked. You dove deep into your mind, trying to find your spot where you could live and exist without restrictions, where you could imagine anything and everything. Like, a comfortable, cosy hut next to a deep lake. Below the surface, a wild array of life that welcomed you as one of their own — several types of fish, beavers and otters, water snakes, and snails; all of them accompanied by colourful algae. And you. You would fit in so well; nobody to throw you out, nobody to talk to you roughly, nobody to set you into this world only to abandon you in it. No. This lake would be your home.

“Excuse me, [Y/N]-san.”

Your eyebrow twitched. 

You did not want to be dragged out of your mind, so you pointedly ignored the voice trying to speak to you and hoped with all your might that they understood to leave you the fuck alone.

But, when was life ever kind to you?

“[Y/N]-san.”

Were you going to keep ignoring her, pretending to be asleep to avoid whatever conversation she wanted to strike with you? Yes. Was Shimizu Kiyoko going to stand down there forever, calling up to you for your attention? Probably not. So you bet against her patience, accumulated by dealing with the nuisances in her team, and instead on your endless one of being a piece of shit. 

What you didn’t think to include in your calculations was that this was never a one versus one. If it had been, you might have succeeded in getting her to give up and go, but backing her were also the rest of the teammates — especially those two loudmouths. 

“Oi, who do you think you are, ignoring Kiyoko-san when she gives her precious attention to you?!”

Ugh. 

“Yeah!! Do you know what I would give to have her even look at me?!” Nishinoya Yū chimed in, just as fired up at the prospect of their dearest manager being disrespected like that, and before you knew it, the bars of the railing next to you rattled, and your eyes opened on instinct and in defense, immediately narrowing, because what the fuck was that idiot doing? 

Heaving himself up, gripping the metal with his hands, was Tanaka Ryūnosuke, whose face you could only describe as having bitten into a sour apple. He was giving you a death stare, which was interesting seeing as how you had disinterestedly watched him freeze up in front of any girl he tried to talk to. Eyebrows raised, eyes squinted, mouth curled into a grimace. 

You returned his glare with no hesitation.

“Kiyoko-san is the heart of the team, and you’re just gonna act like she’s invisible?! Not happening. On. My. Watch.” Tanaka all but spat at you, his voice daring you to take him up on the offer to challenge him. In all honesty, you would love that. It had been ages since you had gotten into a good brawl, and the way he came to his manager’s defense, you didn’t think that he seemed like somebody who would shy down from getting into a fight. 

But you also were somebody who liked to provoke people some more, so you glanced over his shoulder to Shimizu, who shifted a bit uncomfortably. Maybe she didn’t like for people to make a fuss about her; maybe she couldn’t care less. Who could say?

So, you scoffed out, “What do you want?”

Tanaka started fussing almost immediately at being ignored, but you kept looking at Shimizu, and she narrowed her eyes back at you, “Now that we are two, we can take notes about how the guys play during their individual practices simultaneously rather than have to force them to wait or not give them the necessary attention.”

“And?”

“Oi, what do you mean ‘and’?! Listen here, you littl—”

“Ryūnosuke,” one word from Shimizu and he was as silent as a little puppy. You rolled your eyes when he let go of the bars, softening the blow to his knees by landing in a bend. 

You stood up as well, stuffing your hands into the pockets of your tracksuit, “Look. I’m not here because I want to, so no, I don’t care to help you out. And no, I also don’t care that it makes me sound like an asshole. Take care of your shit on your own.”

“— you do sound like a right proper piece of s—”

“Pft, who does she think she is?”

“—Sugaaa, this is scary…”

“Do we have to have her in the team—”

“Maybe I should follow her example.” — “Tsukki, no!”

“Alright, guys, calm down,” Daichi’s voice interrupted as a flurry of voices spoke at once; his stepped-up presence settling the others, authoritarian yet gentle, steadfast once again. It irked you to no end, and you couldn’t help the scoff that left your lips, drawing the attention of a dark brown gaze as you made your way down, grabbing your bag tightly. He had merciful eyes, you thought offhandedly, a kind look on his face, even though the friendly smile was forced. Somehow the fact that he still looked at you like that made you feel weird, even though you didn’t want him to do that, even though you knew that the smile wasn’t really meant for you. 

“How about we just take a little break, yeah?” he suggested, and even though the air was tense — when it became clear that the captain was going to handle it, their shoulders all seemed to loosen up a little, becoming less burdened with the weight of you. 

When he saw that you weren’t coming down to meet with him but instead beelined straight to the entrance, or in your case the exit, he jogged up to you.

“[Y/N]-san, wait up!”

You didn’t want to look at his face again; the smile he would have to pressure his muscles to form, so you kept your head low and when he was near enough, you gritted your teeth together and hissed at him to stop expecting you to do anything. He wanted to reply; you could hear it in the intake of breath, in the change of air as the familiar heaviness settled on your shoulders about having to convince them that you didn’t belong; the familiar anger that you had to make yourself look like a fool because they just wouldn’t get it on their own. 

“Let her take a walk around the block to cool off, Sawamura,” the coach butted in before Daichi could get a word out, “and let the others come down as well.”

You didn’t lose any time at heading his word, though instead of walking around the block, you walked straight out of school and didn’t come back.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, your fee hasn’t been paid yet, and you know how incredibly strict he is with missing payments. I wish I could let you through, anyway.”

You didn’t know why you had even tried to see whether your mother was true to her word. Of course, she was. She was a lawyer for god’s sake. Once her word was given, it was like a binding contract; it didn’t even matter that you had not consented to it. But then again, you were underage, she was your legal guardian and she was the one who paid for your swimming classes.

You gave the sweet receptionist at your usual swimming hall a tiny smile because, after all, she had grown to be something akin to an aunt for you, the way she always set aside little treats for you and made sure you showered and blow-dried your hair before exiting the swimming hall, always nagging you to not catch a cold.

“It’s okay.”

No, it wasn’t, but you also didn’t want to disclose your entire history with your mother when other people were waiting in line. You swiped your useless membership card off the counter and back into your pocket and bid her goodbye before turning back to leave. Stuffing your hands into your pockets you stepped out into the cold autumn air, fingers fumbling for a cigarette to keep you warm and stress-free. Well, not really stress-free, but at least you could pretend that with each breath you sent into the sky, your worries could be swapped along. 

It had been four days since you were last at the volleyball club practices. You couldn’t bring yourself to go when you knew you were just wasting time away there, so you usually just went home. Your mother hadn’t known, because she stayed late every day at the office anyway. It wasn’t like she cared to talk to you still.

You walked up the street to return home, but when you stood in front of the familiar wooden door to your house, your pockets and your bag had an easy time convincing you that you did not have your key with you. 

You frowned as you tried to remember where you had seen it last, but that was hours ago at school. Had you left it in the locker? You looked through your bag again for good measure, but again, your hands did not find the key to your home. You rang the doorbell — maybe one of your parents was at home? 

No answer.

Groaning, you turned around. Time to walk all the way back to school. If life was a gamble, you’d bet against yourself every time.

Karasuno High was almost eerie in the evening, and definitely way too cold. Jogging up to the entrance, you slipped through the door into the foyer, the lockers all lined up neatly. Your name, your name, your name, your name — ah! There it was.

Opening it up, you prayed silently that your key was to be found. You were not in the mood to deal with the consequences of a lost one, nor the conversation that would follow about how you should keep better track of your things, even though you were not in the habit of losing belongings the way your mother liked to throw at your head.

“Ah, thank god,” escaped you when your fingers found the key lodged in your school shoes, though how it got there, you had no idea. Fishing it out, you stuffed it into your bag and closed it up, in case it decided to jump out and run away. 

“[Y/N]-san.”

You closed your eyes for a second and sent a short strong-worded letter to the universe, before standing up and turning to the teacher, who you knew had just dismissed a team of volleyball-crazy teenagers and who was currently looking at you through his glasses, his eyes serious. 

“What.”

Takeda sighed at your response, but came closer nonetheless; not enough to chase you away from its proximity, but enough that you knew he wanted to talk to you. Fuck, you really did not want to have any conversation with anybody, but you stayed put anyway. 

“The principal visited practice today.”

You tensed up but said nothing. The principal did what? 

Takeda noted your posture, the tight grip you had on your bag, and continued, “It was a mandatory check-up on how the club was faring with you having joined it. You weren’t there, so when he asked for your whereabouts, I told him I had sent you on an errand.”

Wait, what? 

As he was talking, you had already prepared yourself for the fact that you were going to be expelled, that your mother was going to throw you out, that you were going to join the homeless on the streets of Japan, that you were a failure who couldn’t even manage to not stay in school — not that you really deserved to, seeing as how you continued to self-destruct even though you knew the consequences awaiting you.

Yet, here Takeda was; his wavy black hair cropped short, glasses slowly making their way down his nose bridge, mouth set in a line and lying for you. 

You stared at him in surprise, eyebrows for once not drawn heavily over your eyes, but almost meeting your hairline in complete shock.

“This will not happen again,” he said firmly, looking into your eyes, deliberately and attentively searching for your gaze so you could understand him crystal clear, “I will not cover up your absences for you should the principal come around the next time. Stay away if you must, wreck your future if you feel like that’s something you need to do, fine, but I will not jeopardise Karasuno’s volleyball club again like that.”

He didn’t even allow you to respond, just turned around and left the school through its entrances, leaving you speechless. 

You hadn’t asked for his good graces, hell, you didn’t even want them yet he covered for you anyway. Why would he do that? Was there something he got out of doing so? If he didn’t want to endanger the club, why...would he risk it the first time? Why?

You looked at the swinging door and the retreating figure, and felt the blood rush back into your hand when you softened the grip on your bag. You stared and stared and stared until your eyes begged you to blink.

As soon as you stepped through the door with the key that, thankfully, did not jump out of your bag and escape you, your mother’s voice resonated through the house. You didn’t think anything of it, since she used to be in meetings and calls with colleagues all the time at any time, but when your name passed her lips, you froze.

Was Takeda not enough of a surprise? 

“I’m waiting,” she called out, her voice impatient, and for a second you contemplated just leaving again, but when she called out your name again, this time more urgently, you rubbed the spot between your eyebrows and moved.

You didn’t have to answer because as soon as she saw you appear at the threshold of her office, she fixated you with a cold look, one leg in her dress pants folded over the other, her heels sharp as always.

“The president called me today and reported about how you’re doing at school.”

You pressed your lips together. Of course, your mother would be in contact with Karasuno High about your performance, like the ever-controlling freak that she was. Her fingers were crossed, her blazer decorating the backrest of her chair, and even though you knew she wanted you to look at her, you kept staring past her face at the blazer and its buttons.

“He said you’ve been keeping to the agreement we made,” one of her fingers started tapping against her hand, and you shrugged your shoulders in response — you sure as hell were not going to correct her.

“Look at me.”

You really didn’t want to, but her voice was hard enough that you knew she was not playing around. Reluctantly, you allowed her to search your eyes for the confirmation that you knew she was not going to find, and—

“I knew it,” she leaned back for a second, her posture once again wavering under the strain of having you as a daughter. You gritted your teeth together and she continued, her anger flaring up more and more, “I know you. The school lessons? Sure, I could believe that you attended them, but I knew you were going to have trouble with the club activities. As if that fool Takeda could lie to me and think he could get away with it without me finding out.”

This angered you, too. Not that you were skipping your extracurricular responsibilities but that your mother knew you weren’t going to like it and she threw you into the deep end, anyway. You thought you even heard her voice take a subtle note of schadenfreude that she ended up right. You also felt a sting of anger when she called Takeda a fool, even though you didn’t disagree, but…he cared enough to cover for you, didn’t he? But what did it matter? Why were you — 

“But why did I expect something different from you?”

It shot out of you, your tongue hot and stinging from the force of the feelings behind them, “So, why did you sign me up for this shit?! If you know that I hate it, why would you force me to do this? Do you just enjoy watching me fail? Is that it? You like watching me fall on my stupid face?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Why wouldn’t I want my daughter to succeed?” she waved your concerns away like she always did. Like she never bothered to see past your words at the hurt feelings that brewed inside you, “Your discipline is abhorrent, and so you need to learn.”

Your mouth opened to retort something, but she cut you off, sighing, “Though, I can see I need to change your incentive otherwise you will not work.”

Eyes narrowed at her words, and even though you really hated the way it sounded as if she saw you like a toy she could fix, you crossed your arms in front of your chest, trying to calm down your breathing, waiting on what she had to say.

Her fingers brushed the hair that escaped her perfect sleek ponytail out of her face, “If you promise me that you give your best and attend the activities each week, I will pay for your swimming class each week.”

Your heart felt like it might be able to breathe, might be able to relax, might exist outside your being, and you looked at your mother, and even though you hated her so much it hurt, even though you hated how much you wanted her approval, even though you didn’t want to strike any deals with her...if it meant you could swim again, you could be free again—

“Okay,” you whispered.

to be tagged | @ilovemymomscooking

[lovelettersfromluna]

Hi! Let’s talk :)

Let’s start off with the usual. How are you? Have you been eating well? Drinking lots of water? Getting enough sleep? Taking care of yourself? I hope you have been. This year has been really fucking crazy despite us just now finishing January, but are we really all that shocked?

I’ve tried making this post a few times, and I really hope I get this one right. I have so many thoughts and so many things I want to say, and it feels hard to convey all of it inside one tiny post. I wish I could just give you a voice memo of me rambling for 30 minutes instead.

I know what you’re thinking. “Luna, why didn’t you just make a post about taking a hiatus? Surely you were aware of how hectic things would get in a months time?” And you’re right! You are very very right. I made that post with every intention of coming back as permanently as possible, however things happen very quickly when you least expect them to.

To make a very long story short, I’m working now! Which greatly affects my posts on here. I’ve been working full time, alongside being a student full time, which fills my plate up a lot more than it was before.

I mean this when I say this, but I am not going anywhere, this page is not going anywhere. I have every intention of fitting this into my schedule, because this is my hobby. I write to destress, I allow my imagination to run rampant and write to my hearts content. However, there will be changes.

I plan on implementing a post schedule for this page, because if there’s anything I need to stay organized right now, it’s structure. I haven’t fully figured out when that’ll be, as I haven’t been working for that long yet. Once I have a better idea of my permanent schedule, I’ll be getting on that as soon as I can to set aside time for myself to write.

Regardless of what my work schedule will be, I won’t be on here the way I was when I first started my page. Posts will be a bit more spaced out, because I’m just one person. I’m only capable of so much, and I’m trying to avoid anymore burnout as much as I can.

This year alone, I’ve done things that have terrified me my entire life. I’ve had to cross so many hurdles within the span of a month that have overwhelmed me, exhausted me, and made me extremely proud of myself all in one. It’s a part of growing up, and I ask for you all to bear with me a bit longer.

I wish I could have all the free time in the world to be with you all, and give you the work you want, but my brain is only capable of so much.

This is not a hiatus post, so please don’t feel like it is. This is simply me discussing the future of this blog, because things are going to change. I understand if this upsets you, because I’ll miss writing until four am to my hearts content. I’ll try to do that whenever I can! I just won’t be able to do it as often as I used to.

Thank you all for your patience and kindness while I try to navigate my time here. This little space we’ve created together has been one of my greatest achievements and it makes my heart glow knowing I’m able to share it all with you. I’m still here, writing, reading, and doing what I can with the free time I have, and the idea I have are almost overwhelming. I can’t wait to share it all with you.

As always, Love Luna 🤍

[nerdishpursuits]

Who needs enemies with brothers like Andres & Tasio. The very definition of disappointing, incompetent, useless and petty. For once finding myself agreeing with everything Jesús and Damián said. The rest can go immolate. Andres is such a coward he doesn't even have the courage to vote or look his sister in the eye. He also never works but claims he doesn't like the way things are going: ergo, I don't like the new business we're getting that everyone stands to profit from. Don't think I've ever seen a more insipidly moronic male lead. He should know Marta the best. His trust in her should be absolute and irrevocable. She’s always been firm but kind and, most of all, fair. And if she’s in trouble because of Carpena now? It’s Andres’ fault because she tried to protect him. This inept man, much like Tasio, never takes responsibility for his actions and cowers under the guise of neutrality. Looking at his face this episode made me sick, not going to lie. As for Tasio? His is a case of bone-deep idiocy, worthy of study. The way to earn your father's love and family's acceptance is to vote against your sister? I hope he gets the cold-shoulder from now on because he deserves nothing less. Damian's chilling don't call me father in the preview is golden. Eat sh** Tasio. And then some. I just can’t with these two anymore. The brothers who Marta did everything in her power to protect and support are the very ones to betray her when she needs them most. Both Andres and Tasio deserve to cry tears of blood as far as I'm concerned and I hope Marta doesn't give them the time of day. I want them to fucking grovel at her feet.

Not to mention the Merino have the audacity to question Marta's integrity and Andres not only fails to defend her, but tries to gaslight her? And nimwit TOSSio the cherry on top. Toss him away indeed. He reeks of idiocy. Truly, if stupidity hurt? Andres and Tasio would be howling in pain, and the Merino too. The look of surprise, pain and betrayal on Marta's face. Ugh. They don't deserve her, they really don't. Cannot wait to see the Merino brothers fail though. They deserve the chance to prove how truly inept they are. These PEEople don't deserve to profit from the business Marta bent over backwards to create for the company. The bathhouse project is nothing but a drain on their resources and they won't know how to manage it. Looking forward to everything blowing up in their smug, condescending faces. And when I say faces I mean Digna as well. Short of murder she's no better than the very people she condemns. She's the kind of fake-nice that's utterly repugnant. The way she used the information about Marta and Fina when it best suited her purposes? Vile indeed. I hope Fina and Marta learn about this and confront her. She should be held accountable.

However? Now that I’ve gotten the initial ire off of my chest? Long term? I also have to say Marta being deposed via treachery could end up being a good thing for her personal development and character growth. It opens up a lot of doors for her, doors towards new possibilities and opportunities.

Too long has she chafed under the yoke of her family, always trying to prove herself to them, always putting herself last. So long in fact? That taking distance from her family and family business might help her reassess things. It might help Marta clear her mind and, hopefully, start removing the last of her shackles. @midniteowlet and I got rambling after this last episode and we’re finding this new development quite interesting.

1. Marta needs to learn how to be more combative and severing the proverbial umbilical cord might be just what the doctor ordered. Does it sting to be blindsided and betrayed by soggy-brained, mediocre people who claim they’re family? Definitely. Not only does it sting but it fucking hurts. For all her good will and intelligence? Marta needs a more ruthless approach when dealing with this kind of individuals. They dare question her intentions and actions? Slam them with a boatload of undeniable facts and figures, gloves off. They’ll only prove their so-called expertise amounts to nothing. She also needs to stop holding back and simply call it as she sees it. Her brothers and cousins need to be held accountable. ¡A cantarles sus verdades, ale!

2. Through her alliance with Pelayo, Marta might end up carving out the kind of independence she truly needs. Sure, she’d be tied to Pelayo but she also stands to gain power and influence in a way that might benefit her and Fina. One possible scenario could even be the Merino bankrupting the business and Marta injecting capital and owning it herself. There’s many ways for her to reclaim her throne, sometime down the line. If done well? Such a storyline could prove immensely satisfying.

It also stands to reason it would be good for Marta to secure new income because her cousins will run the business into the ground. She’ll need to finance that vacation with Fina somehow. Priorities and all, just saying.

3. Too many people within the business know about Marta and Fina. Which means they need to find a way to be together that’s sustainable, long term. One that doesn’t hinge on the benevolence of person x or y. And who knows? Becoming part of a hotel empire might offer them such a chance.

Is it ideal? No. Sure, they could just run off together. But that would mean the end of Mafin on the show. And I think we all want so much more. So all aboard the Angst-Express.

4. Angst can be very satisfying if well-written. And if Marta and Fina’s journey continues to be treated with the same level of respect and care? (which the screenwriters said it was, especially given how beloved this narrative is) It will be a treat. Their story needs to have ups and downs and twists and turns. But as long as the characters remain true to who they are? Their trials and tribulations will be most rewarding. That deliciously angsty pining, the bittersweet longing, the feverishly wanton desire, the ever-growing need that culminates in passion unleashed. It’ll all be there, for the taking. Just biding its sweet, sweet time. I, for one? I’d love me some delicious, quality Mafin angst. And, by the looks of it, I think that’s exactly what we’re going to get.

We’re going to suffer. But we’re going to love it.

[jujumin-translates]

[A3!] Event | Devil Maid’s Holiday | Episode 10

Tio: “...So, why don’t we all do a once-in-a-lifetime live performance as idols on Halloween night?”

Cherie: “A live performance as idols!?”

Lilu: “I’m going to do it, obviously.”

Lala: “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, that sounds sooo fun! I’m also really interested!”

Cherie: “Okay, but like, where is this even coming from!?”

Ame: “Hm~m, idols, huh… I dunno, that kinda sounds like a lotta work…”

Lala: “Ame… Y’know, you could probably mess with lots of humans being an idol.”

Ame: “...! Messing with lots of humans…”

Ame: “Well, if that’s the case, I’m in!”

Cherie: “Just ‘cause of that!?”

Celine: “Absolutely not.”

Lala: “Head Maid… But…”

Celine: “I’ve told you a hundred times, you’re not allowed to let loose like that. I can’t allow you to perform as idols.”

Tio: “But…”

Eliza: “A moment please, Celine.”

Celine: “Lady Eliza…!”

Eliza: “This is something that I want to do. So you understand, right, Celine?”

Celine: “...Haah. …If those are your wishes, then I shall respect them, Lady Eliza.”

Eliza: “Splendid ♪”

Lala: “Yay!”

Cherie: “I can’t say no now that you’ve said that! Mannn!”

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Izumi: (Finally, the day of the Halloween night live performance comes.)

Lilu: “Evening, everyone! Thanks for coming!”

Tio: “We’re the devil maid idol unit…”

Maids: “devidevi tails!”

Lala: “Our unit only just formed, but you’ll all support us, won’t you?”

Cherie: “Kyaah, we’re so glad~! We’ll do our best, ‘kay?”

Celine: “Thank you so much, it truly is an honor.”

Ame: “Alright, we’ll sing our debut song for you. Just follow our lead!”

Eliza: “We’re about to make you all fall in love, so be ready!”

Tio: “We’re sending our hearts full of love your way ♪ So keep on listening!”

*Everyone dances*

Izumi: (Everyone’s acting and expressions alongside the cute, slightly dark music and the overall devilish feel, are so cute…!) 

Izumi: (It was really short notice, but you can really feel the effect of the manager and Rento-san helping out.)

*Audience cheers*

Tio: “Thank youuu!”

Lala: “Hehe, did you all become obsessed with us?”

Cherie: “Look, Ame, they’re saying you’re cute.”

Ame: “Huh!? I-I’m cute…?”

Eliza: “Seems like Ame’s getting flustered~.”

Celine: “Fufu, Ame, and everyone else is so adorable.”

Lilu: “We’re sooo glad that you all enjoyed our song!”

Tio: “But sorry… devidevi tails is a unit only for tonight. So we…”

Maids: “We’re disbanding today.”

Lilu: “So really, thank you so much, everyone! We’ll be returning to being regular maids now.”

Izumi: (And so, the maids leave their microphones on stage and disband… The Halloween night live performance has come to an end.)

Lilu: “Aaah, that was so much fun! Definitely the best holiday ever!”

Tio: “No, this was work, not a holiday!”

Lala: “Well, whatever, it doesn’t matter what it was. It was still the best night ever.”

Cherie: “I wasn’t really sure about it at first, but as soon as I tried it, it was really fun. I guess this sorta thing isn’t so bad.”

Celine: “Ahh… How on earth am I going to explain this to the Demon Lord… Haah.”

Eliza: “Don’t worry, I’ll explain it to him. You and everyone else were so wonderful, Celine.”

Ame: “Ugh, I still can’t believe they were calling me cute…”

Lala: “Are you still flustered, Ame? Hehehe, you’re so cute~.”

Lilu: “Even though our unit disbanded, this was so much fun, I kind of want to do it again next year.”

Lala: “Yeah, yeah, me too!”

Tio: “Let’s all do it again next Halloween night!”

*Applause*

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Izumi: …Yes. …Yes, that’s right.

Muku: Our performance went off without a hitch, but…

Azami: Now the Director’s talkin’ to the client online.

Sakuya: I wonder what they thought.

Taichi: I’m so nervous…!

Izumi: …Understood.

Izumi: …Of course. Please consider our company for the upcoming performance.

Troupe Members: …!

Izumi: I’ll get back to you with more details. …Yes. Thank you for your time today. Goodbye.

Izumi: …Well, there you have it… Congrats, guys! They’re letting us do the performance!

Taichi: Heck yeah!!

Azami: Nice.

Homare: Ahh, what a relief. 

Citron: I am very glad! We will do our best at the real thing too!

Izumi: They also praised the performance, saying it was different and more interesting than the idol troupe’s.

Izumi: They said the costumes, along with the setting and the story, were great for the goal of this performance.

Muku: We discussed all of that a lot. We even asked Ibuki-kun for tips about the dancing.

Azami: And then they pestered us ‘bout shootin’ TikTaks while wearin’ the maid outfits…

Azami: Well, but I guess we gotta thank ‘em later for that.

Izumi: Now that it’s been decided, we should work on fitting in a few more rehearsals. There are still quite a few things that could use some ironing out.

Sakuya: Yeah! We can have a review meeting later.

Yuki: You bet.

Muku: …Ah! By the way, when is the event?

Izumi: Halloween day.

Taichi: Great, it won’t conflict with the day of our Halloween party!

Izumi: That’s right, you guys have been planning a party at the dorms, haven’t you?

Muku: …Then, I’ve got a great idea.

Yuki: A great idea?

Muku: Can everyone come and gather over here? Ah, please wait just a bit, Director-san!

Izumi: ? Sure, got it.

Izumi: (I wonder what they’re up to…?)

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Izumi: (Today’s the Halloween party! Everyone was working hard on the decorations and food, so I can’t wait to see how it all turned out.)

Izumi: (Huh, the lounge seems to be pretty lively. I wonder if they’ve started the party already.)

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

*Door opens*

Sakuya & Yuki: “Welcome home, my lady.”

Izumi: What!? 

Yuki: “This is a party for a special night. Please enjoy this Halloween evening to the fullest.”

Sakuya: “Come now, we’re at your service.”

Izumi: (Ah, is this a role study?)

Azami: “Don’t just stand there, come over here, my lady. Please take a seat.”

Homare: “Here, have some tea first. We’ve prepared a special Halloween tea for you today.”

Taichi: “There are sweets too. There’s pumpkin pie with man-eating pumpkins and Mont Blanc with trick chestnuts. There’s cat paw madeleines, too!”

Izumi: Whoa, it all looks so delicious! I can’t decide what I want.

Citron: “Well, the solution is simple! If you can’t decide, eat them all ♪”

Muku: “My lady, you should put this on your lap so your clothes don’t get… Uwagh!” 

*Muku falls down*

Sakuya: A-Are you okay!? 

Yuki: Are you serious? I get that you’re supposed to be a clumsy maid, but I never would’ve thought you’d actually fall down.

Muku: Uueh, sorry, it’s my fault…

Izumi: Ahaha, so you were doing a role study.

Muku: Yeah. This is a party, and since we’re already wearing our costumes, we figured we could turn this into a role study.

Yuki: So, you’ll play along with us, won’t you, my lady?

Sakuya: Please, my lady!

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] [ 🕸️ ] [ Next Part ⇢ ]

[medi-bee]

isat pokemon au, my liege?

my rambling in tags

[quietwingsinthesky]

the doctor is emotionally manipulative. he’s very good at it, and even better at justifying it both to himself and the people he’s doing it to. he can see when his approval, his affection, is valuable enough to someone that withholding it will be an effective way of getting them to do what he wants. this is one of his best flaws, that he’ll do this to people and do it to them for his own definition of what’s good for them.

(gestures vaguely) twissy.

[lumiilys]

What if I just rambled in the tags rn?

[lesbiansanemi]

This bitch cannot take a hint oh my FUCKING god how many times do I have to tell her I don’t like going to bars before she stops fucking asking

[dol-dee]

Hm I would love to continue Dee's dol journey and play it more but I feel like I’m starting to run out of stuff

[glittertimes]

I think I finally understand what’s at the root of all my weird little problems and why I have such a hard time connecting with my body.

I do so much work to read and be smart as a defensive mechanism because I’m a really kind caring person and that makes me a little naive and I look a lot younger than I am so I feel like people think I’m easy to manipulate.

But then there’s a part of me that feels like it’s not safe to be smart, and that sounds so weird and counterintuitive but I realized it’s because I’m terrified of being seen.

Like if I’m smart I’m going to have to act on it and challenge people and that’ll bring attention on me that I don’t want to deal with so I’ll continue to be the kind naive nice girl even if people are mistreating me because it’s not safe to be seen it’s not safe to be smart.

Like my body will not use basic protection methods like setting boundaries, saying no or standing up for myself because that requires me to get over that fear of being seen. Like my body fears being seen more than it fears being mistreated and that’s kind of terrifying.