#I have no faith or evidence even that she will make good decisions in her or mine or Fafner’s best interests and that is sober or drunk

[xxplastic-cubexx]

just read the new mutants issue where Charles chose to stay behind in space and my god the juxtaposition between Charles trusting Erik and Erik joining the hellfire club and wondering at his own trust worthiness. I wonder how much of Charles decision was him ultimately trying to avoid the fact that his first class had seemingly betrayed mutant kind and not be willing to face them and how much of it was Dani and Illyana's reaction to him having Karma mind control Illyana. the fact that Illyana was depending on him to ease her mind through limbo and in choosing to stay he forced karma to do it instead, probably fucking up their relationship in the process.

I love him, this is crazy, how much of this is him trying to runaway and how much is this him not trusting himself to fix things and how much is it just him trusting Erik?

i keep trying to put into words my exact thoughts about the sitch but there really is a lot for one issue aintit... oh charles you and your brain...

[jennhoney]

Everything is relatively fine. Murble came home from the hospital last night. She didn’t break her neck (a real possibility considering how I found her) there were not signs of a concussion and she got stitched up. But I keep having little private bursts of crying. I’m so fucking pissed that this is the good lucky scenario. I’m still feeling a crushing panic because it became so obvious that I have almost no one to help me when things like this happen. I have to create new emergency action plans. I have to make new connections with humans I can trust and rely on. because sweetbabyJesus for a second I considered calling abeariknow. Negotiating with an inebriated Murble with a severe head injury is not something I would wish on anyone. Although I feel like nearly anyone could handle Murble better than me. She kept apologizing to me and I kept telling her that stuff happens and that she’ll feel better tomorrow but, and this is a failed cornerstone of our entire relationship so I don’t really have any hope of it ever changing, I tried to get through to her as the observer of the line of bad choices. I reminded her of the series of events. She clearly was having trouble walking so I got her situated in her chair and I told her, “text me or call out to me if you need something. (I needed to go to the bathroom and take my meds and honestly I needed a break from her.) and you promised me you would. But instead of doing that; as soon as I got upstairs you decided it was a good idea to walk across the house to go to the bathroom. I heard two terrible thuds. That probably means you hit your head twice! You just kept going!”

“It won’t happen again.”

“I have no reason or evidence to believe that. That is not a promise you can keep.”

“I can try, Jennifer!”

“I am done with this conversation.”

[tiredfox64]

Hi! How are you? First of all, I love your way of writing, it's amazing! I wish I had that magic that you have. UwU <3 Can I ask you to write a Bi-Han x Chubby!Afab!Reader? Where the reader is Liu Kang's apprentice, but since he does not have time to train her, he takes her to Bi-Han and he mocks her for not seeming strong, but when they face each other, things change and for the first time Bi-Han meets He is attracted to her and wants her for himself. But the reader feels insecure, thinking that this was some kind of mockery. There can be a lot of fluff and a possessive Bi-Han. Please :3

Thick Thighs Can Change Lives

Prior notes: Hoi!! I’m doin fine just trying to finish the semester strong. How bout you? And thank you for liking my writing! (´・ω・｀)

Pairing: Bi-Han x Chubby! Afab reader

Warnings ‼️: KICK HIS ASS!!! AHHHH

It’s an honor to be an apprentice to Lord Liu Kang. He treats you well and always saw potential in you no matter what. Your body did not change the fact that you had a fighting spirit. There was strength in you that was hidden. Though others will doubt you they will eventually find out the truth that you are mighty.

If only Bi-Han saw that from the beginning.

You were unsure of Liu Kang’s decision to send you to the Lin Kuei for more training. He apologized profusely for not having enough time to do it himself. You understood since there were many others that he had to train. He trusted Bi-Han to take good care of you during your stay. If only the first interaction was good.

“This is the woman? Are you sure she is capable of fighting?” Bi-Han looked you up and down with a look of uncertainty.

“Trust me, Bi-Han. She is more than capable. There is a reason why she is my apprentice. Do not judge, lest ye be judged.” And he means it.

Bi-Han grumbled at Liu Kang’s response. He thinks the god is foolish for taking you in. You have proportions he hadn’t seen before on a warrior. He expects abs and flat stomachs, not chubby bellies. He circled you, checking you out from all angles and not in a good way. He pokes you to check for any muscles. You keep hearing a disappointed sigh.

“If this task is too hard for you, Bi-Han, I can always have the monks at the Wu Shi train her.”

Liu Kang’s words infuriated Bi-Han. He makes it sound like he can’t train you himself. That this task is impossible for a man like him. Forget it, he’ll take you in.

“No, I will take her in. She will be better than before. Come on.” He grabbed your hand and yanked you before you could even say goodbye to Liu Kang.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

There were many in the Lin Kuei who questioned their grandmaster’s decisions. You were not like them, that was evident.

He didn’t even work with you at first. After about two days you had to go up to him to ask if he was actually going to train you or not. Clearly it’s not that he’s into training other cause when you found him he was watching all the other Lin Kuei assassins train.

“Grandmaster, when are you going to train me? I thought that was the reason Lord Liu Kang brought me to you.” You reminded him of his purpose.

He groaned as he remembered that you were still here. If he’s going to train he will do it separate from the clan.

“Fine, come with me.”

You followed him to a secluded area of the temple. Your heart was pumping. You were excited to show that you are capable of anything but afraid of failing. Liu Kang’s words echoed in your head telling you to focus on your actions, not the outcome. Give it your best shot and kick his butt!

“Show me what you are capable of. I hope you can show me that you are a worth opponent.” He sounded like he already had little faith in you.

From the start of the fight you were already proving him wrong. You were blocking every attack. Bi-Han was going easy on you for now but seeing as you could at least defend yourself he was hoping you would attack soon.

Hell, you were even dodging his ice attacks. He couldn’t even freeze one of your legs in place. Looks like he was wrong to think that you would be an easier target to hit.

Throughout it all you watched as he grew more and more frustrated. He set the bar too low and seeing that he was wrong was the worst thing he could have expected. Though your special move was probably way worse than having his ego be tampered with.

You finally attacked him. A palm strike to the jaw caused him to fall back. Before he could comprehend what you just did and get himself up you were already above him. You pressed down on him which put one of his legs in an uncomfortable position. You pinned his arm down before swinging your right leg behind his head. With all your strength you managed to flip both of you before locking his head in with your legs. And there you have it, you got him in a triangle choke.

This was just humiliating for Bi-Han. He didn’t think it was possible to lose to you. You had him right when you wanted him. Your legs made him feel like he was being squeezed by a vicious anaconda. The more he struggled the more he lost his breath. It didn’t stop there oh no. You started bending his arm and leg that were trapped between you two. You bent them in directions that would be impossible to achieve unless you broke his bones. His free hand came and slapped your thigh. He tapped out. He couldn’t take it.

You unraveled your legs to set him free. You were panting a bit and felt a bit sweaty. But compared to how he was now you looked like you never even fought him.

“I’m sorry, grandmaster, if that was too much.” You apologized even though you didn’t need to.

Once you were back up on your feet you stuck your hand out to help Bi-Han up. He looked up at you, taking in all your details for once. Maybe he lost too much oxygen when you were chocking him because for some reason you seem so cute right now. Yet he was still upset from being beaten by you. He didn’t take your hand but got up himself and walked away. Not a word was said from him and you were left wondering if you did something wrong.

I can guarantee you didn’t do anything wrong. Bi-Han just needs time to think of where he went wrong and what kind of woman he is attracted to. Looks like he might have an unexpected type.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

No matter how many breaths of fresh air Bi-Han got his new stance on you didn’t change. He has enough oxygen going into his brain this new liking is not a delusion.

He was wrong but he won’t say it out loud. You have the strength of a warrior with a heart of gold. It was all hidden in that plush body of yours. What a fool he was to doubt you.

Now his eyes are always on you. Without the mindset of you being weak he sees now that there is much more to you.

Why didn’t he see it before! Just look at that cute face of yours, especially your cheeks. He wants to squish that face and not in a skull crushing way. And those legs good heavens! Those thighs could kill a man yet he would gladly put his face between them again. Your chest is a good alternative as well. He won’t deny he noticed that from the beginning but he would remind himself about it constantly. It just took him a while to realize the whole package was enticing. Screw it, let him get his hands on your tummy.

Look, Bi-Han likes his women strong. That’s one thing. But if chubby is the new strong well he won’t hesitate to take it. And don’t tell him that’s wrong he can’t be wrong two times in a row.

You did notice his stare. It was different now. You noticed one of his eyebrows would raise as he looked at you. His eyes wandered up and down. Before he could even walk over to have a word with you, you would start walking away. You were concerned he would insult you about your looks. Why else was he checking you out like that?

No one walks away from the grandmaster. You will listen to what he has to say. Bi-Han walked quickly towards you before yanking you back by your shirt.

“Where do you think you are going? Do you not see that I am trying to talk to you.” He is giving you his gentlest voice but it still feels like he will rip your spine out.

“I’m sorry, grandmaster.” You turned around quickly to look at him.

Suddenly his hands were at your face. He had a good grip on your soft cheeks, pinching and squeezing them. You looked up at him with confusion. You brought your hands up in an effort to remove his hands only for him to quickly slap them away. Bi-Han isn’t done admiring your beauty.

You thought he was being mean to you again. He was taunting you by bringing attention to your round face. This ain’t the first time something like this has happened. The only difference is that Bi-Han seems determined to look at you. He’s not saying anything which confuses you even more.

Yes, yes, she is perfect. She will look perfect standing next to me. No one will dare touch her unless they wish to feel her wrath. if anyone dares to say something negative about her weight I will make them pay for their disrespect. They will be forced to watch their hands lose function when I freeze them-

“Bi-Han, what are you doing to her?” Tomas’ voice rang out.

Bi-Han broke away from his inner monologue. He wasn’t done making plans on making you his. His eyes caught onto the sight of Tomas’ hand reaching out to grab your wrist. You looked at him in desperation as you were so confused by what was happening. But suddenly you were flung over Bi-Han’s shoulder. He did it as if you weighted as much as a kitten. He started walking away but he had something to say to Tomas.

“Mind your business, Tomas.” He snapped at his adopted brother before walking off with you.

You were humiliated by the fact that all of the Lin Kuei were watching their grandmaster carry you away. His arm was wrapped around your thighs. You didn’t see his face but he was satisfied that his arm was squeezing your thick thighs.

“Please…just put me down already. I got it you’re strong enough to pick me up.” Your disappointed voice was muffled by your hands covering your face.

“Silence. I will put you down when I want to.”

Were you silent or were you silenced?

Bi-Han brought you all the way to his office before placing you down on the ground. Don’t think you can catch your breath now because his arms quickly wrap around your waist and pull you onto his lap. This day just keeps getting weirder and weirder.

“What are you doing?! Don’t you think I’m a little too heavy to be sitting on your lap?”

He looked offended by your words. As if you were the one who was calling him heavy. It only made his grip on you grow tighter, making sure you won’t leave now.

“Do you see me as a man who is unable to handle anything? Don’t be so foolish. Just sit here and look pretty for me as I work.” He instructed you.

Pretty? Did he just call you pretty? Maybe you hit him too hard during practice. But right now you don’t feel like disobeying any orders from him now. Even if this is a joke you rather wait to get pushed off than get off yourself and face a possible punishment. So just sit there and look your prettiest. You already are a gorgeous lady so there is no need to push yourself.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

It’s not a joke anymore. It stopped being a joke a long time ago.

Every day since that weird interaction it’s like Bi-Han can’t keep his hands off you. He would go near you just to squeeze some part of you. It started with your arms which you really hated at first. You thought he was pointing out how he couldn’t feel muscles in that area. Wrong, he just liked the feel of it.

In general he likes the feel of you. But may the gods help anyone who tries to grab at you. Only Bi-Han can do that.

The one and only time you practiced with the others in the Lin Kuei it ended with someone’s face being smashed in and you being dragged away. Hey, he shouldn’t have smacked your stomach and called you names. He was just a sore loser who couldn’t comprehend losing to you. Well now he just lost his face privileges and respect from the grandmaster.

If anyone doubted you they had to face the fury of the Lin Kuei grandmaster. If fact they can’t even look at you at this point. If they looked at you for at least five seconds Bi-Han would start holding onto you like a child who is afraid their favorite toy will get taken away.

Wherever he went, you had to be with him. He needed to keep his eyes on you. In his mind you are already his, there is no arguing about it. You didn’t even know that’s what’s going on. It just happened.

Bi-Han loves to have you on his lap. It shows everyone that you are his now. He loves having his arms wrapped around your waist and squeezing it. Occasionally he would rest his head against your shoulder. That’s the calmest anyone has ever seen him. He would compare his hand size to your thighs. You thought it was another insult before you felt him squeeze them.

Squeezing, poking, squishing, grabbing, holding, secretly loving, that’s all he seemed to do. If you ever asked why, Bi-Han would silence you. You’re not allowed to question his actions nor hint that there was anything wrong with you. The only time you were allowed to have space was when you need to use the bathroom, eat, or sleep. And even getting him to go away so you could sleep was an issue.

You thought your saving grace would come once you heard Liu Kang would be visiting. He wanted to check on your progress and see if you wanted to return to the fire temple. He manages to make more time for you. No matter how much time you were away from him you were still Liu Kang’s apprentice.

Though that depends if Bi-Han will let you go.

One of the clansmen alerted Bi-Han of the god’s presence. Liu Kang soon came walking into the office. He was shocked to see you sitting on Bi-Han’s lap. Clearly it wasn’t fully your decision since you looked shy about it.

“I see you have gotten along with my apprentice. Is there any reason she is sitting on your lap instead of training?” Liu Kang addressed Bi-Han.

“Is there an issue with this. You brought her to me, I make the decision on what she is supposed to be doing right now.”

“I mean, I think I should have been training at this point but you were barely letting me do that.” You talked back, barely caring about what is happening anymore.

Liu Kang’s glowing eyes kept shifting between you and Bi-Han. If what you say is true, which it is, that means the grandmaster has been lacking in his duties. Though to Bi-Han he hasn’t lost anything from this experience.

“If that is the case it might be best to come back with me, my apprentice. Perhaps Bi-Han has other things he would prefer to attend to.” Liu Kang gestured for you to come with him.

The moment you tried to get off, Bi-Han pressed your body against him more. He glared at Liu Kang who looked back in shock. There is no chance in hell that he will let you walk out of this temple. No one will take his strong, chubby woman from him.

You sighed, realizing he will never give up. It dawned on you that he wasn’t making fun of you. He genuinely liked you now that you have shown your potential. You shrugged your shoulders at Liu Kang since you didn’t know what to do now. You would like more training but it might be a whole battle just to get Bi-Han off you. In a way you’re not complaining all that much.

“What is the meaning of this, Bi-Han? You have lacked in your duties to-“

Bi-Han didn’t want to hear anymore from Liu Kang. He carried you in his arms like a princess and walked out of the office. Liu Kang followed close behind him, still scolding him for his actions. All Bi-Han would respond with was a blunt no and continued walking on.

You’re left to think while this madness is going on. There is one thing you are certain you are feeling. Pride. Pride in the fact that you not only beat Bi-Han and proved your worth but proved that you are worth his affection. You changed this man’s perspective and his type. His eyes have been opened to the possibility of having a bigger figure in his arms and in his life. This is the way.

In an effort to get Liu Kang off his back he walked into his bedroom and slammed the door shut before Liu Kang could get another word out. He placed you on the bed before laying down next to you and resting his head on your chest. It’s hopeless, he’s too attached to you. I mean just look at that face. You didn’t think he could unfurrow his eyebrows. This is a moment in history!

“You’re not gonna let me go I’m guessing.” You asked.

“No.” Plain and simple from Bi-Han.

You held yourself back from chuckling. He’s clearly the possessive type. And if he can see that there is beauty in you then you will take it even if you had to beat him up first for him to see that.

“Fine, you win. Just this once.” You said softly.

Are you happy with your prize, Bi-Han?

After notes: Good amount of people don’t expect me to be strong because I’m chubby. A lot of my strength comes from my legs. But I’ve had instances where I have slapped and even punched people by accident. Literally told a story yesterday of how I punched someone I knew by accident and they folded. Anyways I was very happy to get a request like this. I hope you are happy with the outcome I did my best! I’m sorry i didn’t post yesterday I was very tired and mentally drained from all the bs. Hopefully that didn’t affect what I wrote. Adiós!

[burningcheese-merchant]

burningcheese evidence part 2 because yes

I'm kind of foaming at the mouth right now, I'm not really going to be 100% coherent in this post, episode 6 has melted my brain and I need to cool off (also I have actual work to finish irl lololol)

Spoilers under the cut, don't want to be That Asshole

Also for the 1,000th time, it is perfectly okay and understandable if you do not like this ship, I'm not holding a fucking gun to anyone's head, I know it's not really canon or anything, just let me have my dark hero/villain relationship in peace

"Hey where's Golden Cheese? Is Golden Cheese awake yet? Can she wake up now? No? Why isn't she awake? I want her to wake up already, why won't she wake up already? It's implied that I've asked this question multiple times, when will someone give me the answer I want? I want her here, I want her attention, I want her to wake up already-"

He thinks so highly of her in his Joker-esque way. She's so strongggg. He knows she's strong. Why wasn't she strong before? This isn't like her, he knows that. He knows her. He knows she's strong. He wanted to see her be strong. What happened?

Wanting to straight up get high with her. Wanting to watch her let loose. Calling her a combination of "little thief" and "little bird", two pet names the BurningCheese community (spearheaded by yours truly) has had Burning Spice assign to Golden Cheese

"I KNEW SHE WOULDN'T DISAPPOINT ME" bro thinks the whole damn world of her and had faith she wouldn't let him down, look how fucking happy he is she broke out of prison. She's just like him right now fr fr

She's giving him precisely what he desired, which is a struggle. Which is a chase. Which is a hunt. Which is a FIGHT. Which is HER. HE WANTS TO HAVE FUN WITH HER.

Bro is literally SMELLING her everywhere dude. He's attuned to her. To her presence.

"Hey bring her back to me, I miss her. But I swear to God, if y'all hurt her, if y'all ruffle a single one of her feathers, I will KILL YOU, YOU GOT THAT? SHE'S MINE! ALL MINE! BRING HER TO ME ALIVE AND THAT'S IT! YOU GOT IT?!?!?!"

God the cute sing-song voice I can't right now. Jesus Christ, my guy. Calling to her like that, really??

Sniffing her out again because he's fucking deranged and obsessed with her. He's got her whole essence on lock. Tracking her down like a fucking bloodhound. He's hungry for her, he's STARVING, he's BARKING MAD THAT ANYONE IS TRYING TO GET IN HIS WAY

Little bird? Little bird?? Little bird??? LITTLE BIRD??????????

THE NAME I HAD HIM GIVE HER IN MY FIRST BURNINGCHEESE FIC, WHICH I WROTE DAYS BEFORE THIS FUCKER EVEN RELEASED? THE NAME ALL THE OTHER SHIPPERS HAVE HAD HIM CALL HER TOO? YOU CANONIZED THAT? YOU MADE IT REAL? YOU MADE THE PET NAME HE HAS FOR HER REAL??? I CAN READ THIS IN A DIALOGUE BUBBLE FOR REAL? THIS IS IN THE GAME FOR REAL? ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW???

"How good it is to see you in one piece" SMILING AND LAUGHING BECAUSE HE'S GLAD SHE'S OK? TELLING HER SO TO HER FACE? MY GUY

Every step she takes that is wrong to others is right to him. Bust out of jail? Yes good I like that, I want it, I knew she wouldn't disappoint me. Lead him on, make him chase her, have them play hide-and-seek? Yes good, this is fun, I love the thrill of a chase, I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE I CAN FUCKING SMELL YOU I CAN FEEL YOUR FUCKING SOUL YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM ME LITTLE BIRD. Not taking his own goddamn power back? What kind of fool would make such a stupid, regrettable decisi- JK HE'S GLAD HE MADE THIS DECISION, THAT MEANS SHE CAN BE HERSELF AND KICK HIS ASS STILL, THIS IS WHAT HE WANTED, THIS IS EVERYTHING HE WANTED, SHE IS EVERYTHING HE WANTED! YES! (Also, one Freudian slip of several where he says it's HER Soul Jam and not HIS. He's already handing it over to her in his mind. Why? Why tho? Didn't he want it back? Guess not, huh? Guess having the pretty cheese lady beat his ass was too much of a turn-on, huh???)

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW? ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL? HE SAYS THIS TO HER? WITH THAT FACE? WITH THAT TONE OF VOICE? SAYING SHE'S LOVELY? THAT WHAT SHE'S DOING IS LOVELY? CALLING WHAT THEY'RE DOING A "DANCE"? TELLING HER TO KEEP IT UP? TELLING HER HE'S THOROUGHLY ENJOYING THIS?

HE KEEPS TRYING TO REASON WITH HER. HE KEEPS TRYING TO TALK TO HER, TO GET THROUGH TO HER, TO GET IT INTO HER PRETTY LITTLE BIRD SKULL THAT HE'S RIGHT. THAT DESTRUCTION IS THE ONLY WAY. Why go to that trouble? Why does he give a single, solitary fuck what she thinks or feels? Why even bother speaking on the matter at all, if it's a fundamental truth in his eyes already? WHY KEEP TELLING HER TO FIGHT, TO KEEP PUSHING, UNTIL SHE UNDERSTANDS HIM? WHY DOES HE WANT HER TO UNDERSTAND HIM? WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK? And what's this about "and see the day"? Didn't you want to kill her, Burning Spice? Didn't you want to crush her, break her to pieces? Was that another Freudian slip there? Did your mask fall off for a second? DO YOU NOT ACTUALLY WANT HER TO DIE? DO YOU WANT HER TO LIVE, TO STAND UP AND FIGHT, JUST SO SHE'S FORCED TO RECKON WITH THE TRUTH OF YOUR PHILOSOPHY? WHY DO YOU CARE, MOTHERFUCKER? HUH? WHY???

"Stop teasing me" my brother in the Witches we ALL know you don't mean that. You've been BEGGING her to tease you the past two fucking chapters. Stop lying you dumb fuck, your face is giving it all away anyway

He's still clamoring for them to get fucking high together, honestly wtf is wrong with him? Drug-fueled combat, is that his kink? Also boy he sure has a vested interest in her enjoying their battle, doesn't he

She wants more? She wants more of him? She wants more of what he's got? She wants more fun? She wants him to strike a pose that clearly shows off his arms and chest more? YOU GOT IT BABYGIRL-

"You would destroy everything you have, just to get to me?"

"FUCK YES!!!"

My guy. My man. My cookie. My bro. My dude. Your mask fell off. Your mask fell off, my guy. You just told her point-blank that you'll kill people to get her. You'll blow up your own house to get her. You'll trash everything you ever owned to get her. You even have excuses ready to go to justify it. "Oh, it's all garbage, if you want it go ahead. This place ugly as fuck, I hate it, I wanted it gone anyway." Burning Spice. Burning Spice Cookie. You just admitted out loud that you are so obsessed with her that you will tear down your entire life for her. You just told her that to her fucking face, with a big, dumb grin. You've got the "happy" sprite equipped, buddy. You're HAPPY to tell her in no uncertain terms that all that matters to you is going after her. Fighting her. Getting to her. HER. ALL THAT MATTERS TO YOU IS HER!!!!!!!!! YOU JUST FUCKING SAID THAT SHIT OUT LOUD!!!! CAUGHT IN 4K AND YOU'RE NOT EVEN MAD!!!!! YOU'RE NOT EVEN DENYING THE ALLEGATIONS!!!! THIS CAN BE USED AGAINST YOU IN COURT, BURNING SIMP COOKIE!!!!!!

If he doesn't compliment her in some way, even indirectly, at least once per conversation, he will spontaneously combust. Pointing out how different and interesting she is, how she breaks the mold, how she defies the cycle of change and history even after it's already chewed her up and spat her out. Just say you want to put your dick inside of her, dude, please this is fucking embarrassing-

Ok nvm bro is straight up having the biggest, hottest orgasm of his entire fucking life right now, he's straight up speechless, he says like 3 coherent words to her after she awakens and then he's just looking like THIS and smiling so hard his damn is about to be split open by that ecstatic grin. Laughing his stupid, horny, obsessed, creepy ass off. Bro looks like he's CHEERING FOR HER in this shot, are you fucking kidding me? He's HAPPY she got back up, he's HAPPY she got a power boost, he's HAPPY she's kicking his ass, JUST LOOK AT THAT BEAUTIFUL SMILE, HE'S SO IN LOVE IT HURTS

And last, but not least:

Was this really necessary lol

BurningCheese is canon, Burning Simp Cookie is down terminal, we can all fuck off home and die now, I will now be ascending to Heaven (for 5 seconds before God smacks me back down to Hell, because no way I deserve paradise for all of my bullshit lol), thank you goodbye

[amaryllis-sagitta]

DATV more thoughts about Solas [after I saw More Crossroads Stuff]

Not gonna lie, I'm seriously struggling to stay sympathetic towards him. The sadboy shtick got tired in that note from The Missing #3 if not earlier, and the pestering messaging from the game feels like a setup. "Look! He has REGRETS. HE REGARTS, OKAY????". Cool. But then, the seemingly common sense response from both Rook and the NPCs around is to go on an angry rant about how performative and hollow Solas's regret is, and how he will 100% without all doubt go full Farquaad on the world as soon as he breaks free.

His characterization in this game feels like BioWare tries to pander to stans and haters at the same time, but moreso to the haters if you haven't entered the game with an already Solas-favorable attitude. And yet, I don't feel like I have any room to make up my own mind when trying to fill in Rook's shoes because someone's always breathing at my neck repeating HE'S THE GOD OF LIES AND TREACHERY. LIES AND TREACHERYYYYYYYYYYYYY. It makes a principled Rook, who wishes to understand Solas without the ulterior motive of outwolfing the Wolf, look dangerously naive. Being understanding towards Solas is no longer portrayed as a choice of open-mindedness and mirroring but one of... a leap of faith that borders on folly and forbodes a bad ending (*cough cough* parallel to Varric *cough cough*)?

On the other hand, there is an attempt to portray Solas as a victim of toxic codependency, but what does it matter? It's truly an accomplishment for Mythal's appearance to obliterate not one but TWO arcs about breaking the cycles of abuse and untangling from poisonous influences that instill a toxic sense of duty. Morrigan's eyes were pried open too, and she moved past the "mistake" of defiance towards her mother. Solas remains the #1 Mythal Stan even if it implies him basically regretting he has ever existed, because every step and every decision since he joined the world makes him complicit in unspeakable evils.

All in all, despite using Solas to reach her own goals and maintain her own position, Mythal is vindicated by the narrative if not straight up absolved by the weirdest clapback from the assumed moral objectivism of the Fade spirits so far -- she was driven by Benevolence in the beginning and not sheer greed or hunger for power. This is supposed to be evidence to support Mythal's special place in the universe as "the best of them all". Meanwhile, she is responsible for the Blight. For the sake of survival of the first elvhen on the Earth, she would destroy the Earth's very primal creative force. But letting the other Evanuris have the Blight would take things a step too far. Okay? Yay? Are we supposed to consider this growth?

Where is this supposed benevolence? The Mythal we saw showing benevolence towards the elven People was FLEMETH, the one who prevailed in the post-Veil world and "grew wiser". It's the Asha Bellanar. It might be MorriMythal who keeps watching over the Veil Jumpers in Arlathan. Not the shard we petition for help supposedly consumed by the nature of Retribution, that dwells on the hurt and reproach of all the betrayals she experienced, and replies with cynicism to a Rook who tries to come off and principled and show that they care for injustice whenever, however and to whomever it happened.

My greatest gripe with the Mythal thing is that all of this could come together somehow if that encounter was a beginning of a true arc of reflection, moral change and tangible reparation.

I haven't completed the game yet but I have read about the potential implications of this for Solavellan and... ughhhhhhhhhhhhh

I've always been kinda lukewarm about this romance personally, but it looks like the version of a Solasmancing Lavellan that is strongly hinted by the narrative is... either a sycophant or kinda done dirty by the Mythal thing? I'm going to see once I reach the endgame (I'm building up towards the "good" Solavellan ending because I don't have the patience to explore what "bad" Solas means considering how he is characterized at his best).

[unsiredtribrid]

I feel like so much of the theme of TBOSAS for Coriolanus and even Lucy Gray is choice. Like do you choose to humanize and have empathy for the people suffering on the other side, or do you become fearful and choose yourself always?

I think the burden of interpreting Lucy Gray that’s left on the shoulders of the reader is partly a test in and of itself. Like do you believe Billy Taupe’s accusations about her character, who was as fearful as Coryo and wanted Lucy Gray to die along with him (just the same as Coryo did in the end when he shot at her after he thought he was poisoned by the snake)? Or do you take Tigris’s interpretation where she thinks Lucy Gray is someone trying her best and doing what she has to in traumatic circumstances that are trying to get her killed?

Coryo also favored Tigris’s interpretation closer to the beginning of the book— he even joined Tigris and stood up for Lucy Gray’s character in the face of the Grandma’am’s bigotry. And he really did believe it, too. But then as the book goes on and he’s groomed and then put into situations where he has to choose between his own fear and being more empathetic, he lets fear win. He starts questioning if Lucy Gray is just using everyone (in that case, men) around her, which also mirrors how Billy Taupe spoke of her.

In the end, both men did choose that they would rather have her dead than not have her at all. Which, to me, when you compare that with the things Lucy Gray has actually actively done so far, is a pretty strong indicator that Tigris’s views are the ones that are more ‘correct’.

No, we can’t see into her head. Yes, she probably started out flirting and using her charm to try and get a shot at surving the games (which is one of the most appealing things about her character). But how do you as the reader interpret that? Do you think it’s someone doing what they have to to survive, or do you think of it more negatively and see her as a liar or someone you just can’t trust? In good faith and conscience, you would look at it and say that using one’s charms on the people of the Capitol to try to escape being killed by the Capitol is absolutely 100% fair game and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all. In fact, it’s what people should be doing. In some respects, like with all performing, it becomes genuine connection and it moves people to understand you even if it started out ‘fake’. No one criticized or took issue with it when Peeta did it. And in the exact same way, it didn’t make Peeta less empathetic and kind to people of the Capitol who weren’t directly involved in what was happening to him. You as the reader can choose to believe that of Lucy Gray, just like you did with Peeta (even if, in Peeta’s case, you saw actual evidence of it since you weren’t reading from an unreliable narrator with limited perspective).

Whether Tigris is ‘right’ about Lucy Gray is almost irrelevant. What is relevant is the decision, as the reader, to assume the best in her and treat your opinion of her with empathy and the benefit of the doubt. That’s what Coryo should have done at the end of the book, but he didn’t. That’s part of the over arching theme about treating other people better and not dehumanizing them or assuming the worst in fear and paranoia.

Regardless of the fact we don’t get much time with her and we can’t see her inner monologue, what we do see Lucy Gray do isn’t anywhere in the ball park of what Snow ends up doing at the end and then after. Lucy Gray puts a snake down Mayfair’s dress to freak her out, but even that wasn’t something fatal. Mayfair was fine and she lived up until she was killed by Coryo. Lucy Gray stood up for herself against Billy Taupe (not to say there aren’t nuances to how their relationship probably became rocky off the page, before we’ve met either of them. I’m sure there are, even if we’ll never know them), but there’s no indication his claims are true. All we have is Lucy Gray’s word. She claims that she flirted a little as part of the job, but that’s all it was. She says she didn’t do sex work to survive, but openly admits she would if it meant keeping Maude Ivory alive. And that’s without including the other nuances of that conversation, which would be that she was 16 (and younger) and ‘sex work’ here would really be rape because it would likely involve men. So? Assuming anything less than savory because of Billy Taupe’s implications there just seems pretty dark/fucked up.

But back on track, my point: as the reader, do you choose to believe her, or are you paranoid? Do you choose to look at all of the situations she’s in and think she’s a survivalist using her charms and wit, or do you think she’s malicious in some way? How you think of her with little information is important and just kind of feels like its own test and thought exercise.

Even if she set the snake on Coryo, it wasn’t a poisonous one so it was little more than a distraction and maybe a way to get him to worry about that instead of chasing her. Even when she had suspicions he could kill her, she chose to use her smarts to flee and (maybe) survive. But in contrast, Coryo chose to try and finish her off because he didn’t like how his heart broke at the thought of her not ‘caring enough’ about what they have to even have a goodbye before he left. He hated the loss of control of the situation. It was part of the reason why he ended up involved in the rebel plot and killing Mayfair— he was obsessive over Sejanus and needed to feel like he was in control of him in some way. He needed to know what he was doing. And in some ways that was out of genuine love and care, but in some it was fear. And the fear is what made him choose betrayal when he got himself in that situation where he was surrounded by jabberjays and Sejanus was openly talking about a rebel plot that could get them both executed. He chose betrayal to save his own skin because he was scared. He wanted control and then he didn’t have the guts to go as far as he needed to, so he chose his own life. Same thing with Lucy Gray when he fired that gun. He was scared of the unknown factors. Started worrying about her killing him or telling on him and all sorts of things because he was scared and he chose not to believe in her.

Will we ever know if Lucy Gray actually cheated on Billy Taupe? No. Will we ever have more than her word? No. Will we ever know if she was truly attracted to Coryo at the start of their flirtation or if that was 100% a tactic until she caught feelings later? No. Will we ever know if she set the snake on purpose or even if she knew it was venomless? No, not really. But that’s not the point. The point is, do you look at her actions laid out in front of us and choose to believe the best in her? Do you choose to be empathetic and see the situation from her perspective despite being directly in the head of the main character who was groomed (and scared) until he descended into madness?

Someone once said that the difference between everlark and snowbaird’s dynamic is Katniss and Peeta were willing to die for each other before they even knew if the other had definitive feelings for them that they could control. They loved each other even when they didn’t know the other’s exact feelings or their perspective. They were even directly posed to kill each other in the games because originally only one could survive, so they actually had every reason to choose paranoia and didn’t.

This ability to choose good faith seemed to persist even after Peeta was hijacked. But with snowbaird, Coryo had to ask Lucy Gray if it was real before he saved her life (in the movie, at least. In the book it was less cut and dry and he wondered if it was one sided in the midst of his feelings unfolding and far before he cheated to save her). Coryo even says himself to Lucy Gray that he knows his jealousy and the way he wanted her to be thinking about him (and be into him), is stupid. Because it is— she’s in a life or death situation fearing for her life and it would be a miracle for her to have time to figure out or even have a crush on someone when she’s about to die and every ounce of energy is put into both that and the fact she’s locked in an actual cage. It is actually stupid for him to be jealous over that.

But again, as the reader, (to flip the script for a second and talk about Coryo’s side) do you interpret this as Coryo being a complete piece of shit who doesn’t care about her at all and is ‘sociopathic’ for worrying about how she feels about him in this situation? Do you think them having feelings at all is just completely trivial in the face of a life and death situation where she has more to worry about? Or do you choose to believe that Coryo is a teenager here who has grown up living in situations where his life hasn’t been safe and he’s been starving, so that’s just the norm for him at this point, and it’s actually beautiful that he was able to feel something like a crush or love in the midst of something actually traumatic? Even though the tributes have it much worse, the Academy kids have been groomed into this worldview and have been dying (and just generally being hurt and traumatized) during this program that the adults devised in order to test/‘perfect’ their own war crimes and fascism.

But to circle back to the snowbaird and everlark point, there’s a huge difference in perspective that the ships had here and the outcomes/results were completely different. Snow didn’t find peace. He was paranoid and bitter and awful. Katniss and Peeta had to work at it but they could find moments of peace because they chose to believe.

I’m a snowbaird shipper and not an everlark shipper (soz, they just don’t give me buzz 😔) because I personally find alllll of these things about Coryo and Lucy Gray to be really fascinating and I think they have insane chemistry. I also think it’s sort of like a Greek tragedy, in a way. It feels like they had a lot stacked against them, even their very personalities, but despite that they did feel real love. And I think that’s beautiful.

But I wanted to talk about all of this because people discuss Lucy Gray a lot in terms of if she was ‘manipulative’ and sometimes people even just flat out put blame on her, which… I don’t even know how to address that because it’s very hard for me to understand how they could read the book and come to that conclusion in any way. But yeah, these are my thoughts on it and just generally the technique Suzanne used for Lucy Gray’s character and how readers engage with that.

[schraubd]

Yet More Trumpist Humiliation of the ADL

I really don't intend for my post-election coverage to be so ADL-centric. But I can't help but be struck at the degree to which Trump's Jewish and Israel-related decision-making might as well be solely based on how to personally humiliate the ADL, and prompt them into embarrassing and degrading acts of submission and hypocrisy, to the greatest extent possible. For example, Trump's announced pick for UN Ambassador is New York congresswoman Elise Stefanik. One of my basic rules of 2024 political observation was that "one does not, under any circumstances, have to hand it to Elise Stefanik," who defined the term bad-faith grandstanding when it came to her supposed objections to campus antisemitism even as she was directly promoting dangerous antisemitic conspiracy theories on her own.  But alas, the ADL eagerly jumped in with praise for the selection, allowing us to juxtapose this: next to this: Like I said -- just abject, humiliating supplication. It couldn't be more pathetic. Or consider the position of United States Ambassador to Israel. If ever past was prologue, this is it. The first time Donald Trump was elected, he appointed an ambassador to Israel who referred to liberal Jews as "kapos". The ADL maintained a studious silence, a choice which I maintained "sold out" a substantial swath of the Jewish community that it purportedly was tasked to protect. This time around, the nominee is going to be former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee, who has an even more illustrative history with the ADL. You see, back in 2011, the following sequence occurred: Huckabee made spurious and offensive analogies to the Holocaust (comparing it to, of all things, the national debt). The ADL publicly took exception. Huckabee threatened the ADL. The ADL scampered backwards and issued a groveling apology. So here, at least, the ADL already got ahead of schedule, and I look forward to some embarrassingly effusive praise directed towards Huckabee to emerge forthwith. What we saw in 2016, is only going to be worse in 2024. That's true on many levels, but for the ADL in particular it is evidently apparent -- they will sell us out. They will take vulnerable American Jews, who are rightfully terrified about emergent Christian nationalism and White supremacy and violent extremism and, yes, left-wing campus antisemitism too*, and they will leave us to twist. They will do it regularly, and repeatedly, and without hesitation, and for an embarrassingly cheap payoff. * I include this because, by cuddling up to the far-right powers that be, the ADL will necessarily kneecap any ability to effectively fight campus antisemitism, though they certainly will retain the capacity to yell about it. The sorts of tactics which actually might tamp down on and respond to campus antisemitism, versus the sorts of tactics which yield good Fox News ragebait and can justify blowing up the Department of Education, are not compatible with one another, and the ADL is going to lash itself to the latter at the expense of the former. While there still may be utility in what the ADL can do for someone like me on the local level, in terms of a cohesive, national strategy I do not have any more confidence in the ADL's ability to effectively protect me from campus antisemitism than I have confidence in its ability to protect me from conservative antisemitism. via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/VHakqpj

[pinkorchidsinspring]

Liverpool Night 3 Surprise Song ✨Breakdown✨:

A lyrical breakdown of course…

Let’s get started on the sheer importance of this combination of songs- CAUSE WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS

Carolina + no body, no crime

Carolina as in KARLI-e??

Anyway, she had that smirk on her face and called this the “murder Mash-up”?!!! Murder of what darling? Possibly Taylor Swift™️? I digress, lyric time:

Lonesome I'll always stay / Carolina knows / Why for years I roam / Free as these birds, light as whispers

Translated to: Karlie knows why Taylor roams from man to man and is so “lonesome” in the public eye. After all she’s just as free as any musician right…?

And you didn't see me here / No, they never did see me here

Translated to: the fans didn’t see her there with Karlie, no they never really saw her with karlie. Most of them never saw the intent behind Taylor’s eyes when she looked at Karlie, and vice versa. :(

And she's in my dreams / Into the mist, into the clouds

Oh, Carolina knows / Why for years they've said /That I was guilty as sin / And sleep in a liar's bed /But the sleep comes fast

Translation: Karlie knows why the fans have said for years that she’s gay and sleeps in another liars bed (aka Karlie’s), however she lives peacefully when she’s alone with her lover, and simultaneously lies to the public weekly about her real lover.

No body, no crime as in if there’s no evidence than it never happened??

Much like how she emphasized “infidelity” when she sings

Her husband’s actin’ different and it smells like infidelity.

How very telling of whether or not the same muse in the first song (Karlie) has a ‘faithful’ husband (-when you’re in a lavender marriage it is different morally, but to the public it is disloyalty to even consider he is with anyone other than her)

I think I’m gonna call him out

Maybe as in… I don’t know… 🏳️‍🌈call her husband out of the closet… coughs in coumingoutlor*

ALSO just an added bonus is the sheer amount of times she emphasizes the word “SHE” in the performance… there’s way more than just this short clip 🏳️‍🌈✨💅

The manuscript + Red

The Manuscript as in the ENTIRE torrid affair?!

Whilst reading this part of the analysis keep in mind that I believe that the manuscript is most likely from Karlie’s point of view in the future, it may be from Taylor’s, but it makes the most sense as Karlie’s POV.

Now and then she rereads the manuscript / Of the entire torrid affair

Now and then Karlie remembers (aka rereading) a time (a manuscript) full of ‘difficulty and tribulation’ (the definition of torrid), that was her lavender marriage to Josh.

They compared their licenses

I believe that this could possibly be about Taylor & Karlie in the way that Taylor has a drivers license but Karlie has a Marriage License in the era of this memory.

He said, "I'm not a donor but / I'd give you my heart if you needed it"

Gay best friend offers to give Karlie his heart, or at least his legal (-and for show) heart if she needs it.

And the years passed / Like scenes of a show

From there the marriage begins, and much like a show, Karlie and Josh are constantly performing.

Then the actors / Were hitting their marks/ And the slow dance/ Was alight with the sparks / And the tears fell / In synchronicity with the score

This is her looking back at the lavender marriage/ bearding time of their public relationship. The actors (aka the girls and their men) truly were hitting their marks and convincing the public of a romance worthy of a small Nicolas sparks novel. Obviously this isn’t a happy thing to look back on, and with the pretend comes all the times she wished she could just be done with the agony of pretending all the time. The agony that caused her so many years at the time.

And at last / She knew what the agony had been for

At last, present day (the future) Karlie knows why they did it, she looks back and knows they made the right decision because something good has clearly come from it.

The only thing that's left is the manuscript / One last souvenir from my trip to your shores

The only thing that’s left are the memories of this time.

Now and then I reread the manuscript / But the story isn't mine anymore

Now and then she remembers, but she’s out now. The story isn’t hers anymore. She isn’t in the closet anymore.

Red as in

Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes / Tell myself it's time now gotta let go/ But moving on from him is impossible / When I still see it all in my head

IF you have read this, tell me how I’m wrong when this entire combination of surprise songs so obviously has an invisible string CONNECTING THEM all together. (not so invisible now 😉) Because no I didn’t pick and choose what lyrics from red Taylor sang night 3. She did that herself. AND THESE WERE what TAYLOR Alison SWIFT chose to play directly after the manuscript.

Happy pride month people 🏳️‍🌈✨💗

[magicfootballstuff]

mapi and patri have given up so much at this point that if they’re given the chance to leave with no sanctions then of course they’d take it, even if changes have been promised. no idea if these two will ever decide enough has been done for them to choose to return to the national team but i imagine they want to see the evidence of whatever has been agreed before they even consider it

as for the rest, we have no idea what went on in those negotiations and i don’t think we can judge anybody for staying either. i imagine it’s a good faith thing right now, the rfef has promised certain structural changes that the players want to see so they’ve agreed to play these two games but with the understanding that they can refuse future call-ups without sanctioned if those promised changes aren’t fulfilled

i also feel for pina and hope she’s getting the support she needs too, must be even worse for her as i expect her mindset is the same as mapi and patri by not wanting to play again until things are proven to have changed except she’s also isolated from the rest of them and not there to be involved in the discussions

all my respect to all the players, whatever decision they choose to make today or in the future

[m00n-pr1sm]

Amy Dunne Character Analysis

Disclaimer

This analysis will be of Amy’s character from both the book and the movie, although the 2014 movie adaption takes greater precedence with only some additional details and quotes included from the book as it does delve deeper into Amy’s psyche and add further characterization. Thus some traits may be accentuated further than they are in the movie, not being completely faithful to either story. It’s an analysis of Amy in her totality across mediums, of course being entirely my opinion. There are of course adaptational differences but I will not include the major ones from the books (ex. her relationship with Hillary Hand). This is an analysis focusing primarily on Amy’s neuroses she demonstrates and the childhood links to them, it doesn’t cover in-depth the events nor themes of Gone Girl.

Amy Elliott Dunne, the ever enigmatic dual protagonist- antagonist of Gone Girl is one of the most iconic female villains in modern memory, and one of the paragons of the “good for her” trope in media, is, frankly, one of my favorite characters of all time. As such I have been dying to write a full analysis examining her neuroses and characterization. Beneath the cultural perception of just another “crazy psycho” for girls to claim “she did no wrong” or “she just like me fr!”, lies a fascinating character who is masterfully written and developed by Gillian Flynn, as well as perfectly portrayed by Rosamund Pike. Amy Dunne is a character with a deep, complex psychology that I will do my best to thoroughly explore in this analysis.

From Amy’s childhood we first see the emergence of a literal high ego ideal, Amazing Amy. Of course this is the children’s book series created by her parents with a fictionalized version of Amy being the eponymous protagonist. This was a version of herself that rectified her own personal failures. Amazing Amy became a prodigy at cello, when Amy quit at 10, Amazing Amy made varsity volleyball, Amy got cut freshman year. Even in the (at time) final book in the series, Amazing Amy got married, a task Amy had not yet done. The entire book series revolved around Amy always making the most virtuous, the most selfless, the most perfect decisions.

>”With me, regular, flawed, real Amy, jealous, as always, of the golden child.”

An interesting detail in the book that is omitted from the movie is Marybeth’s numerous miscarriages and stillbirths (which totaled 7). All of these girls were named Hope, until Amy was born. Amy expresses her jealousy towards them, as they were always seen as perfect without ever living; meanwhile Amy herself has to live life everyday knowing that she will never truly live up to the Hopes. That she has to try everyday to be the best she can be. Her very birth was mired in the expectation of a perfect child; given that she was practically a gift from the heavens to her parents.

This sets up Amy’s perfectionism, as the childhood experience of never living up to a projected ideal led her to want to be perfect (and as we’ll later see, the expectation that everyone else is too), to live life always through the gaze of another. Evidently this leads to a loss of one’s inner essence, one’s individuality and sense of self.

>“-I’d never really felt like a person, because I was always a product” (Book Quote)

Amy’s obsession with personas can be seen as emerging from this, as she adapts a personality depending on who she’s interacting with, as to always be the most appealing she can, she is Amazing Amy after all.

>”I’m not sure, exactly, how to be Dead Amy. I’m trying to figure out what that means for me, what I become for the next few months. Anyone, I suppose, except people I’ve already been: Amazing Amy. Preppy ’80s Girl. Ultimate-Frisbee Granola and Blushing Ingenue and Witty Hepburnian Sophisticate. Brainy Ironic Girl and Boho Babe (the latest version of Frisbee Granola). Cool Girl and Loved Wife and Unloved Wife and Vengeful Scorned Wife. Diary Amy.” (Book Quote)

This general attitude leads to people trying to impress her as she places herself as someone special and especially someone to keep around. She entices both the characters and viewers of the film through her manufactured charisma and enchantment. However, we’ll see this dramatically backfire in her relationship with Nick, just you wait!

For now we can focus on the beginning of their relationship as well as what I believe to be Amy’s view on romance.

I believe that Amy has an impossibly high standard of love, one that stems from her perfectionism and general inability to let down her guise of being amazing. Not to mention how her parents were a perfect match, Amy even referring to them as soul-mates.

>”They have no harsh edges with each other, no spiny conflicts, they ride through life like conjoined jellyfish—expanding and contracting instinctively, filling each other’s spaces liquidly. Making it look easy, the soul-mate thing.” (Book Quote)

In her childhood it’s implied that she was into romance novels, specifically Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, which obviously contributes to the idealization of romance, of a literal scripted love.

>”You were an alienated teen and only Elizabeth Bennet understood you”

I think this little quote is incredibly indicative; it establishes a sense of alienation, of Amy never quite fitting in and blending with others.

>”So many lessons and opportunities and advantages, and they never taught me how to be happy. I remember always being baffled by other children. I would be at a birthday party and watch the other kids giggling and making faces, and I would try to do that too, but I wouldn’t understand why. I would sit there with the tight elastic thread of the birthday hat parting the pudge of my underchin, with the grainy frosting of the cake bluing my teeth, and I would try to figure out why it was fun.” (Book Quote)

Back to the topic of romance, through these stories it allowed her to imagine her perfect romance: if Amy could find that one person that truly understood her, beyond the illusion, that then would constitute a perfect union of love. She does deep down (whether consciously or not) want to be loved for who she is; not the idealized, palatable, literal marketed version of herself. Thus she holds trust as a premium, expecting that if she does the Herculean task of unspooling and revealing herself to another, that the other person would love her no matter what.

>”Can you imagine, finally showing your true self to your spouse, your soul mate, and having him not like you?” (Book Quote)

However all of this culminates in an impossibly high standard of a lover, of a practically divine mythical love; where one loves totally and absolutely. Of course where this neurosis is most demonstrated is in Nick and Amy’s relationship.

Amy comments that after meeting Nick she finally felt like a person as he brought out a side of herself that hadn’t been seen, in her own words “a lightness and an ease”, something that Amy enjoyed. In her eyes they had the perfect relationship in the beginning, Nick was her compliment with the witty banter, with their inside jokes, and charm.

However this doesn’t just vanquish her childhood neuroses, through her desire to be seen as perfect, she modifies herself to be a “cool girl” for Nick, complying endlessly to standards to maintain this perception.

>” When I met Nick Dunne, I knew he wanted a cool girl and for him, I’ll admit, I was willing to try.”

Amy essentially became Nick’s image of a perfect girl, witty, fun, and most of all easy-going and forgiving.

Yet one cannot live forever in images and ideas; and as such, the real, true Amy emerged. The Amy that cares too much, that’s hard to get along with, that is a controlling perfectionist. She also tests Nick through the treasure hunts, weaving in little details about their relationship as to challenge Nick and hope that he remembers the things they do together as deeply as she does. Combined with the 2008 recession and declining health of Nick’s mother (the consequences of which will be explored later). As well as Nick’s growing dissatisfaction in the relationship (evidenced by his worsening performances in the treasure hunts, the cheating, using her for sex and ignoring her otherwise, etc). The illusion both Nick and Amy were living in crumbled; they couldn’t possibly sustain their relationship as they were both striving to fulfill reciprocating images for the other.

One of the biggest parts of her character is Amy’s elitism and entitlement, in which she thinks of herself as someone superior, someone that deserves to be loved absolutely for who she is, although only to people she considers worthy.

>”She’s easy to like. I’ve never understood why that’s considered a compliment—that just anyone could like you.” (Book Quote)

Once again this stems from her childhood, in a seemingly contradictory way, she also sees herself as special for being the one that survived from her mother’s attempts, as well as the fact that her birth was so tumultuous that she would be an only child. From this also stems her entitlement for love.

Amy actively looks down upon women she considers “average”, whom she sees as coming from mediocrity and continuously perpetuating that in their lives. She scoffs at them with her wealthy parents and NYC background until her marriage with Nick crumbles. Only then does she realize that she’s become the very woman she would previously disdain. A woman with a failing marriage, the loss of her previous wealth following the recession, and moving to a failed development in Missouri (What the hell’s in Missouri?) for Nick’s mother.

I truly believe this, combined with Nick’s infidelity, and most importantly the loss of her idyllic love culminated in the iconic Gone Girl plan.

>”Nick took and took from me until I no longer existed, that’s murder. Let the punishment fit the crime”.

Nick took Amy’s identity, her sense of self that she so generously revealed to him and rejected her. Implying that she would only be loved if played the role of the “cool girl”; stripping her of who she really was, losing herself in yet another persona. Although Amy admits she doesn’t really have a personality and lives through personas, she still has a semblance of self that she holds dear.

>”-made me realize that there was a Real Amy in there, and she was so much better, more interesting and complicated and challenging, than Cool Amy”. (Book Quote)

Worse yet, Nick had cheated on her with a “newer, younger, bouncer Cool Girl”, leaving Amy in the dust, surely damaging her pride.

But Amy truly fell in love with her idealized version of Nick, believing that she was responsible for shaping that version of Nick. That she deserved that man in his entirety, of course what gets Amy to come back to Nick is the Sharon Scheiber interview, in which he promises to make up with Amy in just the way that makes her think that Nick is the one person who gets her. He makes the little references to their inside jokes (2 fingers on the chin when they’re not bullshitting the other) and a reference to the end of the treasure hunt (always a contentious issue in their relationship). She’s reminded of who he was, that he was once perfect for her, who else could know how to appeal to her heart in just the right way? With the same passion and conviction she reverses the judgment on Nick, clawing her way back to him. She does so in an especially brutal manner, slashing Desi’s throat with a boxcutter right after he climaxes. Putting aside my enormous personal bias against Desi, he was technically an innocent man, taking a great risk in sheltering Amy. However it’s clear that Amy sees him as merely an asset and something to be disposed of once he serves his value, as another prop in her ever evolving masterplan; she did string him along for years through their letter correspondences. He was just another casualty in Amy’s search for idyllic love. She comes back dramatically, literally falling into Nick’s arms while still covered in Desi’s blood like a dress; fabricating an elaborate story about a love obsessed former boyfriend kidnapping and violating her. Despite the glaring holes in her whole story (If Amy’s marriage was as bad as she made it out to be, why did she go back to Nick so easily? How did she get access to a knife and kill him so seamlessly? Why didn’t Amy do anything when she discovered the stuff in Margo’s shed? etc), law enforcement, media, and the public all fully believe it, infatuated with the persona and narrative that Amy’s created for herself. In the end she traps Nick into the marriage and eventually, the family. The last shot of the film is a haunting recall to the beginning shot of the film, as Amy has both revealed and secured herself to be the master of the narrative, finally obtaining her perfect love, no matter what the cost may have been.

Conclusion

Through a constant demand in Amy’s childhood emerges a need for perfection, simultaneously bringing about a sense of superiority and entitlement. The use of personas and façades facilitate this, painting Amy as the most amazing cool girl for whomever she’s performing for, to feed her need to be seen as perfect and desirable. Yet there emerges a psychological detachment from others; as the need to perform inevitably leads to an internal hollowness. However underneath all these layers there also lies the true Amy who has the deep unconscious desire of wanting to be loved absolutely, to have a perfect union of love where she can reveal herself fully and be loved for who she is truly.

>disclaimer for tumblr lol, this is not me trying to claim Amy was innocent I am fully aware that she’s a terribly entitled and narcissistic person but she can still be complex and have relatable desires & be a person even if she’s massively fucked up!!

[vickyvicarious]

Did he get his brain fever, and then write all those terrible things, or had he some cause for it all? I suppose I shall never know, for I dare not open the subject to him.... [...] And if it be wanted; then, perhaps, if I am ready, poor Jonathan may not be upset, for I can speak for him and never let him be troubled or worried with it at all. If ever Jonathan quite gets over the nervousness he may want to tell me of it all, and I can ask him questions and find out things, and see how I may comfort him.

Mina

(Confidence) [...] I must keep it private for the present from all. [...] I have read your letters to poor Lucy, and know how good you are and how your husband suffer; so I pray you, if it may be, enlighten him not, lest it may harm.

van Helsing

Both Mina and van Helsing emphasize secrecy and privacy on the 24th. And to a certain extent it seems like they both are doing the same thing for the same reasons. They both want to protect others by keeping them in the dark, the same thing that has been going on all this time.

But there is a difference. It's the same thing Mina said: "there may be a solemn duty..." She is keeping this secret from Jonathan at his request. He was clear about what he wanted from her: "Take it and keep it, read it if you will, but never let me know; unless, indeed, some solemn duty should come upon me to go back to the bitter hours, asleep or awake, sane or mad, recorded here.'" Mina's determination not to tell Jonathan, to speak for him and not trouble him, all of it is predicated on his request to her.

She promised not to open it herself "unless it were for his own dear sake or for the sake of some stern duty." And she kept that promise, refusing to open the journal until she became too worried about Jonathan panicking on the street and then losing time. This is the same thing. Mina is determined to keep this secret from Jonathan just as long as she isn't certain there is anything to do about it. But, while she herself doesn't buy in to the truth of it immediately, she is open to the possibility that everything within it is true. And based on that possibility, she takes action. She prepares herself for the next step, should that be needed. But even then, she refuses to come to him with this until she knows it is real and that a "solemn duty" does in fact impel him to know.

And then today, that's what happens. When Mina meets with van Helsing, she takes a gamble by opening up to him, and once he writes back to tell her than Jonathan's diary is all true, then she tells Jonathan the truth. We've seen her musing about whether knowing he is either sane or not would be better than the uncertainty, and that is surely a huge part of her reasoning; but I think it's also a consideration that if Jonathan's journal is true and van Helsing is the one to tell her that, then everything that implies about Lucy reveals Dracula to be a present and immediate threat. Action is necessary. This is that solemn duty.

In a way, van Helsing also waits to tell others until there is a "solemn duty" - in this case to deal with the 'bloofer lady.' But really, they have been actively involved in this fight for a while now, and he made the decision to exclude them for them. There was no such agreement as Mina had with Jonathan, although to be fair it would be hard to have done so with such different relationships/circumstances. He also doesn't ever take quite the same leap of faith as Mina does in sharing the journal with him. He's a bit more cautious about it, bringing in first Jack in a more gradual fashion, and then arranging for irrefutable evidence for Arthur and Quincey. At this point, that approach makes sense for him. And both he and Mina wait to inform the others until they've got one ally who also knows the truth and has given them more information (that being each other).

[sicklyseraphnsuch]

Braius, FCG, and Sam

There's this interesting dynamic of how each different player essentially performs faith through their character. For example, the way Jester does faith is the way a long time fan has faith in their favorite popstar. The Traveller is great and she will spread the good word as far as she is able. And Caduceus seems to have a more meditative take on it. The Wild Mother isn't necessarily his hero but she is the forces of nature which must be respected and even wonder at.

The way Braius and FCG handle faith is a lot more to the point. It's a boss-servant relationship. Braius and FCG are almost always seeking guidance from their god - seeking certainty - seeking evidence. When stuck, they cannot move forward without concrete directions from their gods. In short, because they don't leave room for doubt, they struggle to have faith.

Which, unfortunately, places them as the least equipped in this crisis of faith, especially given that the gods are in question. The way FCG, and to an extent Braius, tries to advocate for their god is more or less "I do what I'm told". Honestly, I think Matt could've engineered a way to really challenge Sam in this role by not spoiling his characters too much. (I think in some ways this applies to all of Bells Hells but that's a different post)

Like in Dimension 20, in The Seven, their cleric never heard a word from her god until the Very End. I feel like Matt should've deprived FCG of Changebringer guidance - ESPECIALLY because she's the Changebringer. There's nothing more transformative or changing than having this little robit come into their faith on their own, yanno like a person and not a program awaiting command.

Unfortunately, the way Matt played this, FCG was given directives and direct messages. It all comes to the point wherein FCG finally makes a decision - his decision, wherein he truly understands the meaning of Change. And it's when the Changebringer muted herself .

Now with Braius, we're back to square one. Sam is once again asking Asmodeus for guidance at this critical juncture in time. And again, this is not the best example of how gods are not... tyrannical. If the god-follower dynamic is more of "you give orders and I follow", in the campaign wherein the gods are basically on trial for tyranny, then yeah!! Not great!!! If the god-follower dynamic was more, "I will give you some signposts but ultimately (perhaps even if its at the cost of myself), you go where you will." Then we have more room for nuance and complexity when the gods are equally having faith in you.

But that's it, isn't it? At the core of this campaign, that's the deal with the gods. Even before Ruidusborn and Ludinus lost faith in the gods, the gods lost faith in their followers. When Predathos was on the scene, they couldn't trust a simple follower to take care of Aeor, they had to go in and do the work themselves. They had to be certain that this job would be seen through. And if they had to be certain, then there's no room for doubt, and in doing so, no room for faith.

Braius is mirroring this circumstance by moving forward by the direction of Asmodeus instead of dwelling on that doubt, and coming to his conclusions absent of any evidence/correspendonce with his god. That's what faith is, in the end - when you believe despite not having any true way to prove or explain. Braius must be certain, and so he cannot have faith. Likewise, the gods are threatening "to handle shit themselves" and break the Divine Gate to do so.

It's such a strange backdrop to the how Bells Hells as a whole cannot come to a unanimous decision. They're so plagued with doubts and yearn to have certainty that they bend over backwards trying to find the Right, True, Absolute Answer. But there's no such thing. They must have faith!!

And no one - not the gods, not Ludinus, not Bells Hells have any.

[josephinevalor]

Jane Eyre

By: Charlotte Bronte 

Pages: 691 

Jane Eyre (Character):

I absolutely loved her. She is assertive, stands up for herself but in a way that’s appropriate for the time period, independent, grateful, and hard working. She also struggles and succeeds in having a degree of autonomy, independence, and self-determination in an overwhelmingly patriarchal society. To an extent, I identify with her.  And her struggles show how far women's rights have come but also how far they still have left to go.

Writing Style:

Surprisingly, it flows nicely and I didn't had any trouble understanding it. I also loved how poetic it was. After a good amount of YA, it was a welcomed break. There are a good amount of moments in the book that felt profound and quotable.

Characterization:

I love how full and complex the characters are. They feel like “real people” to such a high degree. Especially Jane Eyre. Reading it I almost felt like it was Charlotte’s diary NOT a character, which makes sense, since Jane Eyre’s life is pretty similar to Charlotte’s.

After this point, there will be spoilers!!

Mr. Rochester:

I did not like him (as Jane Eyre's love interest). He is too physical in parts of the book. Like he comes on Jane Eyre way too strong. At times, he comes across as overly controlling. And overly demanding. Which would have been fine if the book didn’t try to portray it as a romance. Like him lying about his first wife, while a serious offense, was not even the biggest reason why I didn’t like him. I understand this book is supposed to be a “romance” but I didn’t find it “romantic.” Mostly because I didn’t find Rochester to be romantic.

The Plot:

At first is a coming of age story. Then a romance with elements of mystery. And arguably a weird love triangle between Jane Eyre, Mr. Rochester and St. John. I’m saying a weird love triangle because St. John doesn’t want to marry Jane Eyre out of love but he did propose to get married. And this weird love triangle made me wish Jane Eyre remained single. Like I wasn’t team John or team Rochester. I was team “none”. 

The Ending:

I did not like the ending. I did not like that she married Mr. Rochester. I understand why it had to be done. A story with a female protagonist ending up a spinster at that time would have been unthinkable. And the line of “I married him” was considered controversial enough, since it signified that it was Jane Eyre making the decision rather than Mr. Rochester. Thus, it signified a shift in agency that usually was not given to women at the time. But still.... Jane Eyre deserves so much better.

Themes:

Gender Roles: The book, in a lot of ways, is feminist. Jane Eyre earns for independence and stands up for it (which is what makes her such a great character).

Social Class: Through out the novel, the strict social hierarchy of Victorian England is emphasized. Jane Eyre is at an interesting position as a governess. She is, on one hand, close to the upper class because she knows and has to follow their customs. But on the other, she is their employee and her small earnings lead to her vulnerable position. This is evident with how she is treated by Mr. Rochester, how she runs away penniless and almost dies, and how she is warned about the marriage by Mrs. Fairfax.

Religion: Through out the novel, Jane encounters different versions of religion. Mr. Brocklehurst's hypocritical and punitive in her childhood, Helen Burns's passive, meek, and subservient, and St. John's ambitious within the context of serving God. Through out the novel, Jane continues to have a belief in God and while that belief is influenced by those characters, she forms her own principles surrounding faith and religion. Those principles are based in interacting with the world rather than trying to hide from it, being grateful and loving instead of hateful, and finding a balance between earthly pleasures and religious duty.

Overall Rating: 4/5 Stars

[acourtofthought]

listen I wasn’t sure about Lucien and Elain becoming rulers of a court but I came across some of your posts and I’m nowcompletely on board!!! Especially seeing your post about elain being a hidden boss. Like I totally see it now. She has the qualities of a leader who keeps composure at all times and doesn’t show face, tends to put others needs over their own, wants peace. She is a negotiator !!!

Yeah!!! I'm always happy seeing Elain love in the fandom ❤️

Your last line stands out to me because not only is there canon evidence for it "Feyre gave and gave for years. Let us now help her. Help others" (delivered in a firm though not demanding manner) but I think we're going to find that it's a role she took on well before that, during their childhood.

In SF we have Nesta telling us that she (Nesta) and Feyre had always been at each others throats, arguing back and forth and I think Elain as the middle sister felt she had to try to diffuse that tension by staying somewhat neutral. She's the only sister who maintained a decent relationship with both sisters AND her father for years and that speaks to her ability to see each one of their perspectives. Maybe some think that's a cowardly way of handing things, not standing up and arguing for who or what is right but.....sometimes what is right is not always cut and dry, something I think is evident in this fandom. Some will claim Nesta was in the wrong when it came to Feyre, some say Feyre was in the wrong when it came Nesta. But the truth lies somewhere in the middle and I think a good leader makes an attempt to understand all sides. Where decisions are not made impulsively but after trying to see the varying perspectives.

It's something I think she and Lucien have in common and what will make them a power duo.

Some argue how terrible he was for not standing up to Tamlin more in ACOMAF but they forget why he wasn't as pushy as they think he should have been (and no, it's not just because he was also being abused by Tamlin):

"We need order Feyre. We need rules, and rankings, and order, if we're going to stand a chance of rebuilding. So what he says goes. I am the first one the others look to - I set the example. Don't ask me to risk the stability of this court by pushing back."

Feyre calls Lucien Tamlin's "faithful dog" but is a male worried about the needs of an entire people who spent 50 years terrorized by Amarantha, trying to help them rebuild and figure out how to live, really a "dog"? Did the needs of one female who had only been their world for less than a year really trump that of everyone else?

As the FMC of course we wanted to see everyone bending over backwards for Feyre but that's not really how leadership works. Sometimes a leader hovers in the middle in order to do what is best for the most people rather than to doing what is right for one.

And back to Elain, I think some look at her and consider her weak because she stays in more of a neutral territory but she's shown that when there is a clear answer, she does fight for it. She found a place for the humans during the war. She stood up to Nesta to allow the Human Queens to meet in their home (despite what it meant for Elain's own engagement). She hates violence but was willing to stab the king to save her sister and Cassian.

Isn't attempting neutrality and peace as the initial course of action then taking more decisive action only when necessary a good thing?

She's just not impulsive and outspoken so I think people miss how she's taking everything in before coming to a conclusion, considering all sides and I think that sets her up to be an incredibly fair leader with Lucien (an equally rational and fair character) standing by her side.

I do think there's the need for leaders like Rhys and Feyre within the court system of Prythian, ones who are willing to do whatever is needed to save their world even if it involves burning bridges but I think the downside of that has become clear in the novella and SF. The other courts and those on the continent don't trust them and now that they're working towards peace, they aren't having luck because the others are convinced the NC is out for the NC (even thought the NC is trying to make things fair to some degree, I think them being the keepers of the Trove and Made weapons is going to lead to some being suspicious of them still). So to their more aggressive tactics, you need leaders like Elain and Lucien to balance things out, to smooth out the rough edges left behind by the NC, to help the other courts and continents to see that their needs are also being taken into consideration.

[beardedmrbean]

MINNEAPOLIS (AP) — A progressive Minnesota prosecutor who was elected on a platform of police accountability has reluctantly dropped charges against a state trooper who fatally shot a Black man after a traffic stop.

After months of heavy criticism, even from the state’s Democratic governor, Hennepin County Attorney Mary Moriarty on Monday stood by her initial decision to charge Trooper Ryan Londregan in last summer’s killing of Ricky Cobb II. She says that new evidence makes the case would difficult to prove.

Moriarty, a former chief public defender for the county, was elected in 2022 with nearly 58% of the vote. Her announcement shows that charging officers with crimes is never simple, even in the same county where Derek Chauvin was convicted of George Floyd's 2020 murder.

Moriarty said she still believes she made the right decision to charge Londregan based on evidence available at the time. But she said a newly raised defense claim that Londregan believed Cobb was reaching for Londregan’s gun, along with new statements from State Patrol officials backing claims that he was following his training, made the case impossible to prove. So she filed papers Sunday to dismiss it.

“I was elected by the people in Hennepin County to make ethical, courageous decisions,” Moriarty said. “This is the kind of county attorney everybody wanted, not one that made decisions based on politics.”

The dismissal comes as progressive district attorneys and candidates in several liberal strongholds across the country have faced setbacks as frustrations have risen over public safety.

In Oregon last month, centrist DA candidate Nathan Vasquez ousted incumbent progressive prosecutor Mike Schmidt in Multnomah County, after vowing to be tough on crime. Last month in San Francisco, Alameda County supervisors set a recall election for District Attorney Pamela Price, who, like Moriarty, ran on a platform of offender rehabilitation and police accountability. Price had replaced Chesa Boudin, another progressive prosecutor who voters recalled earlier in 2022.

Gov. Tim Walz said Moriarty eventually “got to the right decision,” and that it became apparent that “there were problems in this prosecution from the beginning.”

Walz denied Moriarty’s allegations that he interfered in the case, but also told reporters he would have used his power to take the case from her and hand it to the attorney general’s office if she had not dropped the charges. He said those powers provide a “safety net” to “allow an egregious situation like this to be corrected.”

Leaders with the Minnesota Police and Peace Officers Association, which waged a high-profile campaign urging Walz to take the case from Moriarty, said her statements about her decision were “unhinged” and “riddled with vengeance.” Republican politicians were quick to repeat their claims that Londregan should never have been charged.

“Former Ramsey County Attorney Susan Gaertner. a Democrat, said this case is an example of how the criminal justice system has become increasingly politicized.

“You have a prosecutor who was very transparent on the campaign trail about what her priorities were and what she intended to do in office. Police accountability was one of those priorities,” Gaertner said in an interview. “In this case, it seems to me like she made a good faith decision to charge this case, but then when other information came to her attention, she dismissed it. That was the ethical thing to do. And I'm sure it wasn't easy.”

On July 31, troopers pulled the 33-year-old Cobb over on Interstate 94 because the lights were out on his car. They found that the Spring Lake Park man was wanted for a violating a domestic no-contact order in neighboring Ramsey County. Londregan arrived to assist. While the troopers were telling Cobb to get out of the car, he shifted into drive and took his foot off the brake. When Cobb’s car began to slowly move forward, Londregan reached for his gun. Cobb stopped. Londregan pointed his gun at Cobb and yelled at him to get out. Cobb took his foot off the brake again while another trooper’s torso was at least partially in the car. Londregan then fired twice at Cobb, striking him both times in the chest.

Body camera video shows Cobb raising his hand just before Londregan shot him. Moriarty said the video doesn’t prove a claim, raised by the defense in April, that Cobb was attempting to reach for his service weapon — but she conceded it doesn’t disprove it either. She said prosecutors didn't know previously that this assertion would be key to Londregan's defense.

Moriarty also pointed to fresh statements by State Patrol training officials, submitted as part of the defense case, that the trooper acted in accordance with his training. She said it made the case harder to prove.

Prosecutors took all of that to a use-of-force expert whose analysis lead them to conclude that they’d lose at trial, Moriarty said. The judge might have dismissed the case without even sending it to the jury, she added.

In a fiery news conference of his own, Londregan's attorney, Chris Madel, said Moriarty knew from the start that Londregan would argue he used deadly force to protect himself, and knew since April that the defense would claim Cobb reached for Londregan's firearm.

“This county attorney was hell-bent on prosecuting a cop,” Madel said. “She could not wait for a case like this to come up.” He added: “For her to come out now and say, ‘Oh my gosh, we had no idea the defense was hiding this great evidence,’ it’s just plain absurd."

Londregan, who was free on his own recognizance, remains on paid leave while the State Patrol reviews the shooting. Madel said Londregan plans to return to law enforcement over the objections of some family members.

Moriarty called on the State Patrol to implement several changes to reduce the use of deadly force. The troopers at the scene had better options than leaning into his car to try to extricate Cobb but “bungled” their opportunities, she said. They could have told Cobb that they intended to arrest him, instead of just ordering him out of the car. They could have just let him drive off, she said, because they knew where to find him. Or they could have placed stop sticks under his car.

The State Patrol declined to respond to her recommendations. The Patrol said in a statement Sunday night that its ability to comment was limited because of the ongoing lawsuit filed by Cobb's family in April.

Attorneys for Cobb's family said they were disappointed but not surprised by this outcome.

“The simple fact is that, regardless of how many absurd excuses Trooper Londregan gives to try and absolve himself, he shot and killed Ricky Cobb II at point blank range without any justification and, instead of prosecuting him for murder, the County Attorney’s Office has bowed to political pressure to drop the charges," the family's attorneys said in a statement.

“Apparently, all you have to do to get away with murder is to bully the prosecutors enough and the charges will just go away,” the attorneys continued. "The people don’t believe the excuses and neither do we.”

[10868letsgo]

BBC Bloody Queens Elizabeth I and Mary of Scots

Drama reveals the intimate and ultimately deadly relationship between Queen Elizabeth I and Mary, Queen of Scots, using the words of the two queens and their courtiers.

In the beginning, they never met one another in real life for Mary was in France at the time and widowed to returning Scotland. In fact, the only evidence they had was letters. At first, they happily greeted each other and friendship started out. Even friendly called each other sisters. Their childhood and life couldn't be more opposites than ever. However, after many faults, their once friendly letters became hints of jealousy, betrayal, and mystery between the two women began to grow animosity. And question is was Mary innocent? Or did Elizabeth fall for a trap that made her decision to execute her cousin?

Mary was her father's only daughter and became for six days. She grew up with love and luxuries in life. Her days were full of happiness. She went to France to marry Dauphin of France name Francis I son of Henri II and Catherine De Medici. She was the happy yet spoiled princess who grew up believing that she was the heir to England. Sadly she was a widow and was ordered by her mother-in-law to leave France and return to Scotland. Her suffering and test of faith were not over. Scotland became a Protestant country and Mary a well-known Catholic is their queen. It makes the Protestant lords uneasy. Outspokers like John Knox were highly against Mary being queen. For not only being a catholic but she was a woman. Worse, to Scots, she was a foreign woman. A French woman who ruled the hard blood land Scotland. However, Mary had this attitude that she was queen because it was given right from her birth which made her ruler of Scotland. She started to order people around and was a stubborn woman who would say, "No I am the queen and you are my servant." Or "You will have to do as I say goes." As if she was stomping her feet. But Mary wasn't in court without friends. David Rizzio her secretary and Italian courtier also a musician was her favorite and close friend to Mary. Her half-brother was born from her father's mistress, James Stewart, 1st Earl of Moray whom the nobles that converted to protestant even Moray respected him. But Mary's trouble continues the downfall of her quest. Marriage. First, her hand was appointed by Elizabeth I in a deal that she would recognize Mary as her heir if she married a protestant Lord Robert Dudley, 1st Earl of Leicester.

However, Mary was not only insulted but felt anger that Elizabeth would back on their deal. So, Mary decides she needs a catholic, better position to help her claim better for England.

Henry Stuart Lord Darnley, her cousin born from He was the second but eldest surviving son of Matthew Stewart, 4th Earl of Lennox, by his wife Lady Margaret Douglas, which supported his claim to the English succession. Darnley's maternal grandparents were Archibald Douglas, 6th Earl of Angus, and Queen Margaret Tudor, daughter of King Henry VII of England and widow of King James IV of Scotland. Mary fell instantly in love with his good looks and flattery attitude. But noooo. Not him. Anyone but Darnely. For he is not only the grandson of King Henry the Seventh as Mary's blood. But that was Elizabeth's only concern for that. The Scottish lords did not like Darnely because he was the male version of Mary per se. Plus, he was a drinker, vain, spoilt, womanizer, violent temper, and homosexual as well. Mary was in love with Darnely and ignored such "rumors" as she calls them. That is until after marriage with him. he revealed his true colors as Mary was pregnant at the time, but sent letters to Elizabeth to help her. Sadly Elizabeth was advised not to involve a queen's marriage troubles as this was a personal matter. Mary's trouble did not end there. After killing Rizzio for believing that he is the father of her child since she hasn't allowed Darnely near her. Probably fear the risk of miscarriage. That was when Mary took back power and locked Darnely away in his castle where he died in mysterious circumstances. The house exploded, but he survived before being strangled to death. And guess who was the suspect.

James Hepburn, 4th Earl of Bothwell.

Mary is not only widowed the second time, but she marries the possible murder of her husband. Now the lords had no love for Darnley, but his death seemed a bit off as Mary quickly married to Bothwell. Even drew pictures of Mary as a mermaid. Not a compliment mind you. In Scotland, it means whore or seductress. And Mary's reputation went from bad to worse. She rebelled again and this time both Catholics and Protestant lords wanted Mary out of the throne and placed her son James to be king of Scotland and they wanted Moray to be his regent.

Moray had imprisoned Mary and she was separated from both her son and Bothwell who escaped. But the worst is yet to come, Mary had suffered a miscarriage and it was Bothwell's twins. It was horrifying for Mary. They forced her to abdicate either by her vulnerability of losing her miscarriage or threat. Either way, Mary has lost her crown. Mary had strength and a chance to escape. Elizabeth was her thought of helping her get her crown. Wrong again Mary.

Elizabeth was born to Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn. However, her birth was met with scorn by both Catholics and hatred for the Boleyns. However, it was mostly because of the actions her father, mostly her mother had done. he divorced his first wife and married Anne Boleyn to gain a son. Instead, he had a daughter.

She was beloved by her parents, but Anne Boleyn was beheaded under the guise of treason and saw Jane Seymour as his new replacement queen.

Since then her life suffered as now declared bastard or illegitimate as her older sister Mary daughter of Catherine of Aragon the first wife of Henry VIII.

Elizabeth suffered at the hands of her enemies and was accused of treason which included prison during both her siblings' reigns. But she survived it all even treason plots that brought up her name. And never know who to trust.

She never knew peace nor rest for she knows her enemies are lurking to destroy her. She had to play a game that had two chances life and death.

Her greatest enemy is Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots. When Mary had escaped from Scotland and abdication her crown in favor of her son, James. Elizabeth refused to see her cousin as instructed that she must be sent away and be locked up in comfort as her presence endangered Elizabeth's life. Mary was struck with another heat felt like a betrayal again. For Elizabeth hearing about Mary's reputation back in Scotland that gave Elizabeth the decision to never marry seemed like a good idea compared to Mary. Despite Mary's insistent that she is innocent. Mary claimed that she was kidnapped and was raped by Bothwell. That is why she had to marry him to protect her honor.

William Cecil was very loyal to Elizabeth and a firm protestant reformer. He wants Mary dead, but Elizabeth cannot do it. No one would know why. But it could be a reminder of how she lost her mother Anne Boleyn and Katherine Howard who were queens yet executed by the king's pleasure? Or fear of possible invaders who would use Mary's death to dethrone? Either way, Elizabeth would have to be forced as Willaim Cecil found evidence and proof that Mary was part of a coup to take Elizabeth's life and the crown. This angers Elizabeth as she will never go back to the time when she had to suffer at the hands of her enemies and the injustice was ignored. So, two versions said that Elizabeth was pressured by Willaim Cecil and her spymaster Francis Walsingham that there were new plots that were going to break Mary out and have a secret army waiting for her in France or other countries.

Another version said that she did sign it, but changed her mind as she wanted to spare Mary. Though, time was against Elizabeth. It's either her life or Mary's. She cannot have both ways. Mary was tried and found guilty. Then ordered her to be beheaded for treason. Though stories show she made one final defiant as a queen. She wore a red dress a symbol of martyrism. And three times it take to chop her thick neck. The executioner took her head, but her hair was a wig and her head flew off to the side. Finally, her pet dog was hiding under her dress yapping and covered in her blood.

Well, there you go folks the background and queens who were opposite to each other lives. However, tied by fate as they would someday play the role of life and death. The grand prize for the winner was the crown of England which remained with Elizabeth I for the next 44 years after she triumphed over the Spaniard armada and the final enemy who came close to Elizabeth but she remained undefeated.

After her death, the crown did not go to Mary as planned, but it went to her son James Stuart who became the first monarchy to Scotland and England finally united the two kingdoms into the great nation that is today.