#bells hells is in tune with the general theme of the story

[sicklyseraphnsuch]

Braius, FCG, and Sam

There's this interesting dynamic of how each different player essentially performs faith through their character. For example, the way Jester does faith is the way a long time fan has faith in their favorite popstar. The Traveller is great and she will spread the good word as far as she is able. And Caduceus seems to have a more meditative take on it. The Wild Mother isn't necessarily his hero but she is the forces of nature which must be respected and even wonder at.

The way Braius and FCG handle faith is a lot more to the point. It's a boss-servant relationship. Braius and FCG are almost always seeking guidance from their god - seeking certainty - seeking evidence. When stuck, they cannot move forward without concrete directions from their gods. In short, because they don't leave room for doubt, they struggle to have faith.

Which, unfortunately, places them as the least equipped in this crisis of faith, especially given that the gods are in question. The way FCG, and to an extent Braius, tries to advocate for their god is more or less "I do what I'm told". Honestly, I think Matt could've engineered a way to really challenge Sam in this role by not spoiling his characters too much. (I think in some ways this applies to all of Bells Hells but that's a different post)

Like in Dimension 20, in The Seven, their cleric never heard a word from her god until the Very End. I feel like Matt should've deprived FCG of Changebringer guidance - ESPECIALLY because she's the Changebringer. There's nothing more transformative or changing than having this little robit come into their faith on their own, yanno like a person and not a program awaiting command.

Unfortunately, the way Matt played this, FCG was given directives and direct messages. It all comes to the point wherein FCG finally makes a decision - his decision, wherein he truly understands the meaning of Change. And it's when the Changebringer muted herself .

Now with Braius, we're back to square one. Sam is once again asking Asmodeus for guidance at this critical juncture in time. And again, this is not the best example of how gods are not... tyrannical. If the god-follower dynamic is more of "you give orders and I follow", in the campaign wherein the gods are basically on trial for tyranny, then yeah!! Not great!!! If the god-follower dynamic was more, "I will give you some signposts but ultimately (perhaps even if its at the cost of myself), you go where you will." Then we have more room for nuance and complexity when the gods are equally having faith in you.

But that's it, isn't it? At the core of this campaign, that's the deal with the gods. Even before Ruidusborn and Ludinus lost faith in the gods, the gods lost faith in their followers. When Predathos was on the scene, they couldn't trust a simple follower to take care of Aeor, they had to go in and do the work themselves. They had to be certain that this job would be seen through. And if they had to be certain, then there's no room for doubt, and in doing so, no room for faith.

Braius is mirroring this circumstance by moving forward by the direction of Asmodeus instead of dwelling on that doubt, and coming to his conclusions absent of any evidence/correspendonce with his god. That's what faith is, in the end - when you believe despite not having any true way to prove or explain. Braius must be certain, and so he cannot have faith. Likewise, the gods are threatening "to handle shit themselves" and break the Divine Gate to do so.

It's such a strange backdrop to the how Bells Hells as a whole cannot come to a unanimous decision. They're so plagued with doubts and yearn to have certainty that they bend over backwards trying to find the Right, True, Absolute Answer. But there's no such thing. They must have faith!!

And no one - not the gods, not Ludinus, not Bells Hells have any.

[lilac-5ky]

Roommates from Hell, pt.1 (Toji x Fem!Reader)

Chapter 1: Stolen Fries taste best

(pic from loving yamada at lvl999, adorable manga, recommend)

Chapter 2 | Story Masterlist | Masterlist

Plot: Out of all the women that come and go in Toji's life, you're the only one he calls his friend. But when he suddenly forces his way into your apartment, the feelings you've kept from him are put to the test.

Setting: Pre Hidden Inventory Arc. Toji and reader are both in their late twenties, no Megumi in picture... yet :p

Themes: Cohabitation, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers

Warning: Slight sexual content minus the actual smut.

A/N at the bottom

“You’re late. Again.”

The small silver bell at the top of the glass door notified you of a man’s arrival, his heavy steps refusing to wipe themselves upon entry, spreading mud all over the now-blotted checkered tiles of the dimly lit diner. You’d been expecting the owner of those shoes for the past six hours, his untimely arrival coming as a bitter aftertaste to an afternoon full of childish joy and mayhem— popped balloons, colorful confetti, and half-eaten pieces of cakes swept into one big pile at the room’s southernmost corner by yours truly.

“I never said I was coming,” the voice retorted, its defiant sound overshadowed by the gruesome screech of a metallic chair. “Not interested in celebrating some brat’s b-day, ‘specially if it ain’t mine.”

“How many helpless children must have spent their birthdays without their no-good father, I wonder,” you wiped your hands against your cherry-red apron, pushing the broom back into place. “If your goal is to repopulate Japan, I’m certain you’ll succeed.”

Hefty fingers mindlessly combed through a head of obsidian black, little spikes forming and then settling back down. “None, as far as I’m concerned,” sarcasm dripped from his tongue.

“Well, I find that hard to believe,” you mumbled under your breath, circling through the room to ensure everything was dealt with: leftovers in the fridge, gift wrappings in the bin, and the large aforementioned pile of garbage waiting to be scooped up. “You’ve known Kenzo since birth. Even if this ain’t your thing, the least you could’ve done was make an appearance. He kept asking about his favorite uncle all night long.”

“Except I’m not his uncle. Don’t mix me in with your sister’s family, I ride solo.”

Sigh.

“My sister’s family might as well be your family, Toji. You know how much Hinata and her kids adore you.”

“Good for them, I suppose.”

Another sigh.

“Can you at least tell me what was so important for you to not even pick the goddamn phone up?”

As if the device had grown sentient, a generic tune began tooting from the back pocket of his sweatpants, eradicating your final hope that it’d simply run out of battery.

Without budging from his seat, Toji twisted an arm around his back to pull his flip-phone out, the silver-tinted lid slamming shut as soon as he’d peered at the caller’s number, his next immediate move being to drown the sound in a glass of leftover Coke, fizzy bubbles playing the device’s final requiem.

You didn’t need to ask to know it was a woman, and he didn’t need to answer that she, whatever the name of his latest conquest was, happened to also be the reason for his being unfashionably late.

It was always like that. He was always like that. He went out with one girl after the other; from women of extreme beauty and poise to mindless bimbos who couldn’t tell tea leaves and coffee beans apart. He’d spend some cash to butter them up with expensive meals at overpriced restaurants, or VIP entrance at the hottest club, or even pay for the name tag on their designer clothes, but come next morning, he was either caught stealing straight out of their pockets or checking whether the tag was still attached to the dress for him to return it to the store—at which point, the vast majority gave up, except for those few poor souls who earnestly believed they could fix him, though they never would.

If there were two things in this world that remained unfaltering and resolute throughout the eons, then that was the earth’s orbiting the sun, and Zen’in Toji’s being the bastard of a man you knew and loved— special intonation of that last part.

It was quite the oxymoron. To know him as an irredeemable scumbag with no intention of changing, and to love him for all he was; a sentence as contradictory and controversial as the man before you. What was there to love? He never gave two shits about the people around him dying, and if he could encourage or partake in their deaths then he certainly would. He gambled every cent of cash in his hands away, and his every attachment ended with the disposal of his used-up condom. He was vulgar, cynical, and brass, and he possessed a great charisma of making people dislike him at first glance. His only saving grace was his good looks and even those he managed to scrape on a daily basis.

So, really, what was there to love about a man whose place fitted best among the pile of garbage in the corner? What was the point in all that?

He never answered your question, and when you realized he wasn’t planning to, you dragged a second chair to his side, propping your elbows first and then your chin over the vinyl backrest, feet landing at each side. You took in his expression— sour and undeniably agitated, with a frown tugging at the scarred corner of his lower lip, and a glare too icy to be meant for the wall of American-styled neon billboards he mercilessly studied. Something definitely bothered him, and as a huff stiffened his chin, the reason became evident enough for you to point at it.

“Woman or work?” you gestured at the blood that dribbled below his ear and down his neck.

He followed your forefinger with his eyes, thumb scrubbing where the gush began. He seemed oblivious to his injury, though it wasn’t as if his becoming aware changed a thing.

“So it is a woman,” you gladly seized the chance to rub salt into his wound, drawing a frustrated grumble from him.“What did you do this time? Stole her car and crashed it into a tree? Blew all her savings on cockfight betting?”

“Horse races,” he had the nerve to correct.

“Or… did you by any chance bring an uncalled ménage à trois to her bed?”

“What kind of man you take me for?” Toji protested.

“A very, very, veeeery bad man,” you smirked, and he returned it. You knew him like the back of your hand. There was no need to pretend otherwise after well over a decade’s worth of friendship.

“If a very bad man is what I am, then why’d ya let me in?” he asked. “A young unprotected woman all by herself in the middle of the night letting such scum in never ends well. Thought you were smarter than this.”

“If I was smarter, then I wouldn’t be calling you my friend, would I?”

His grimace turned into a full-blown devilish grin, the kind that secretly had your heart buzzing against the frail set of bones of your chest. He always looked so dazzling when he smiled, that sometimes you couldn’t find fault in those women wanting to believe in his pretty lies, because you, too, wanted to. You hoped that whatever the price for those smiles was, you would one day be able to afford it and gain ownership of his heart, no matter how wretched or blackened it was.

“You are a real idiot to mix it up with me,” he conceded. “Though, you are a greater idiot for letting that term define us. I bet your nights serving meals at some kiddie place get rather lonely. But I could help. I could make you feel really good, Y/N. So good that you’d risk some prick getting in, lest he is me.”

His tongue poked out his mouth, giving his bottom lip a brief lick while he peered at you through half-lidded eyes. He had this way of turning things sexual in the blink of an eye, selling himself so well that your refusal to buy seemed commendable— despite the unmistakable affection you held for his face. Little did he know how much you longed to push that chair to the side and rip his cocky expression along his black-sleeved shirt off his body, making it so that neither of you had a place to hide from the other.

Now, that’d feel good.

“My nights are fine as they are, thank you very much,” you countered your instincts much to his disappointment. “And if I ever needed myself a helping hand, know that you’d be the last I’d call!” Not as if you’d pick up, anyway, you mentally added.

His gust of interest fizzled out as soon as it surged, your rejection forcing him to rock back and forth between the chair’s legs. He wasn’t interested in continuing this. It was enough for him to take in the dusty pink shading of your ears and smile to himself, knowing you were still the kind of woman affected by his charms. Yes, that certainly was enough, for now.

“I’ll clean you up,” you declared, getting off your spot in haste and strolling through the bar in search of a clean towel.

Once you found it, you let it soak under the faucet and brought it back to him, rubbing against his skin regardless of his petty attempt at gritting his teeth. You placed one hand on his shoulder and another at his jaw, pushing them apart to no avail. Every muscle in his body was stronger than your entire bodily force combined, and he was awfully willing to flex that difference between you, just as he was at letting you straddle his hips and climb all over his body like some sort of feral monkey in heat.

A string of profanities that ranged from “bastard” to “shit-eating-asshole-shithead” poured out your mouth while Toji smirked, and smiled, and grinned, and didn’t even try to stop you from knocking the two of you onto the ground, palms barely managing to stable your head over his face. Your pleated skirt had risen, or rather flipped, over your panties, revealing the strawberry pattern panties you were wearing to his greedy hands as they hiked up your flesh without an ounce of shame.

“Wh-What are you doing?!”

“What do you think I’m doing?” he cooed, burying his calloused fingers under the elastic waistband of your underwear.

You felt him trace the inward of your thighs in languid strokes, the fabric stretching the further his hand dipped— closer, and closer to your now-pulsing core, but never so close as to make actual contact. His hot breath tingled your lips, smelling of nothing in particular, but a sweaty tang of a woman’s deodorant that still lingered in his clothes. Had he fucked her before making it here, you wondered, heart tightening at the thought.

Your legs wiggled shut, unable to fully repel his hand, and for a brief moment, you considered letting him go through with this— whatever this was. Even if you came to be another conquest won, you didn’t care. All you needed was for him to hush all logic from your brain, and fuck you senselessly against the checkered tile floor of the “kiddie food place” you served meals at.

“Toji…” you begged, uncertain what you were begging him for until you felt the warmth in your thighs subside.

“Makin’ sure to preserve your maiden’s dignity,” he said as he fixed your skirt in place. “Wouldn’t want some perv catching sight of your cute little ass, would we?”

His condescending tone made you want to throw a slap across his face and then yours; for thinking that maybe this wasn’t a mistake, that you could really move past the pretense of friendship and aim at what you really sought. But he’d been right once before. You were stupid, stupider than all those girls combined, considering you knew and still wouldn’t mind being dragged down with him one bit.

“Fucking asshole,” you blurted as you pushed yourself off him, dumping the cloth on his smug face.

Your lip quivered as you stepped onto your feet, unable to quite shake the feeling of incompletion from your core, walls pathetically clenching around nothingness. You refused to look at him, lest you caved in a second time, and thus you paced around the booths, stopping before the one window whose blinds didn’t block the magnificent parking lot view. Only a black SUV was left— most likely his newest rental.

Following a beep, you watched the lights flicker white, his reflection in the window lifting the chair back up. You crossed your arms over your chest and waited, your impatience and frustration churning into a dangerous mix within your guts, as the asshole whose name wasn’t worth saying moved past you and walked straight to the door, not a single word or goodbye said.

“What about your phone?” you asked, at last paying him a look of spite.

“I’ll text ya my new number.”

“We both know you won’t.”

He glanced over his shoulder and showed you his pearly white canines, his expression not polished enough to be called a smile. You rolled your eyes in the opposite direction, spotting his old device blinking a variety of different lights, refusing to die just like its bastard of an owner.

“What should I do with this?”

“How the hell should I know?” Toji shrugged. “Get rid of it, or toss it in some burger. I’m sure no one will be able to tell the difference. Later,” the bell chimed as the door collided with the frame, chiming a second time as his head popped in a moment later. “Loved the raspberries.”

“They were strawberries, you scatterbrained swine,” you cursed, but he’d heard none of it. The car was gone, and so was he, and it was for the best that he didn’t get to witness the strawberry-colored shadow that loomed over both your cheeks.

Fanning some of that heat away, you returned to the table, surprised to find a white envelope with the name Kenzo hastily written on the front. Cash. Lots of cash. Enough cash to keep a low-end apartment afloat for at least a couple of months. An excuse and simultaneously the answer to all your previous questions.

“You fucking bastard,” you hummed, the term switching to one of utter endearment.

When the first instance of a wintry breeze came charging at the semi-exposed features of your face—a scarf’s fluff tucked right below your nose— you knew that walking all the way to the location where the unknown ID claiming to be Zen’in Toji ordered you to meet up was probably a bad idea.

For starters, you’d turn into an icicle long before making it back to your workplace. Not to mention you had no foolproof way of guaranteeing the person you were about to meet wasn’t some random impersonating psychopath. But when you finally spotted the yellow curvy “M” upon the rectangular red sign that spelled the fast food chain’s name, you narrowed down the psychopaths to that one cheapskate you happened to know.

Walking into the nearly vacant dining area —only the first two booths near the door occupying a family of four each— you detected him almost immediately. He was the only one seated in his wing. Head slightly tilted to look past the window, golden highlights showering the curve of a nose as it arched into thin eyebrows, calm eyes glinting with subtle emerald, and fingers that absentmindedly tapped away onto one of the two paper-covered trays. He had the decency to wait for you before getting into his food, though that didn’t stop him from munching on the occasional fry.

You tugged the handbag off your shoulder and slowly approached him, hesitating to enter his field of view, if just for a moment. He seemed so peaceful and serene, that if you had the guts, you’d snap a picture of him right then and there and make it into your phone’s wallpaper. But you didn’t. You’d never be able to explain it to him in a non-humiliating way, should he catch you in the act, and so, you shook the notion off and marched in his direction, his eyes lighting up in recognition.

“What’s the point of calling me out here for lunch if we are gonna have burgers?” you dropped your bag at the far end of the table. “Why not eat at our place?”

“I like the fries here better,” he bit onto one as if to affirm his claim, licking the salty essence off his fingers. “You should be glad I got you some, too,” he nodded toward the closed dome-shaped box that lay in front of you. “Nuggets over burgers, right? Didn’t know what toy ya wanted though. Cashier girl told me bunnies are quite popular with girls your age, so I went with that.”

Ignoring, or rather postponing your answer to his outrageous suggestion, you peered through the contents of your meal’s box, spotting the wrapped-in-plastic purple-colored bunny key chain right at the bottom between the small portion of deluxe potatoes and even smaller portion of chicken nuggets that still steamed hot air. You were surprised he remembered everything about your order, down to your preference for milkshake over other beverages, and perhaps you would have shown your gratitude if it wasn’t for that last comment of his gnawing at your pride.

“How old did you tell the cashier I was, again?” you gritted, trying to suppress the toy’s cuteness within your fist.

“Didn’t. Just said it’s for some kid I know. Probably thought it was for my daughter or something.”

A pair of googly eyes popped out from their sockets, the bunny’s head in serious danger of coming right off.

“Stop acting like an old man,” you muttered in embarrassment. “A nine-month head start in life doesn’t make you old enough to be my father.”

“Still older than you, kid,” said Toji, his fingers latching onto his wrapped-up burger. “Now eat up. Didn’t pay ya lunch for it to go cold.”

Annoyed by his remarks, but oh-so terribly starved, you decided to let things slide, the two of you lunching in a period of temporal truce. He went through his burger in big bites, clearing it out before you even finished your portion of nuggets. You mildly wondered why he’d held off if he was this hungry, but didn’t press on the reason behind his invitation until after his tray was half-emptied.

“So… why’d you wanna meet up? Got something to tell me?”

“Mhm, I actually do. How would you like us to be room—Nah, that doesn’t sound too right,” Toji shook his head off, dusting the excess salt off his fingers. “I decided I’m moving in with you.”

“You, what?!?” You shrieked, eyes wide with shock, resembling those of your newly acquired key chain.

“What I just said. I’m moving in,” he repeated as if you hadn’t heard him the first time around. “Got everything right here. I’ll pop by later so you can show me my room.”

You glanced down at what he tapped as “here”, spotting a large black duffel bag that rested on his feet. He wasn’t joking, you panicked. He was being 100% serious about this. Directing your milkshake to your mouth, you took a nervous sip, nearly choking on the plastic straw between your teeth, while Toji kept staring at you, awaiting no answer in particular. After all, he wasn’t asking. He was proclaiming.

“Why would you want that?” you asked once you regained the ability to think rationally. “Weren’t you the one who said you ride solo?”

“Numerous reasons,” he stated, drawing his forefinger forth as if to recount. “For starters, rental prices going up, gas too. Inflation in the market and all that crap. Your place is also closer to work, and” he leaned closer, “wasn’t your neighborhood the one on the news recently? You know, those serial break-and-enter cases? As far as I’m aware, the culprit’s still running loose, could be a cursed spirit or something. You can’t see ‘em, but I can. I’ll keep ya safe. Wouldn’t you want that? Sounds like a fair deal to me, at least.”

The repetitive pattern of a catchy pop song blasting from the speakers served as a backdrop to your thoughts, eyes flickering between the table and his face. He wasn’t exactly wrong about what he said. The girl next door was the robber’s last victim, and from what you’d gathered, it seemed like the ones targeted were exclusively single women in their twenties. Curse or not, that was the intruder’s type, and you just so happened to tick both of those boxes.

From a standpoint of reason, his suggestion sounded fair alright, but this was Toji we were talking about. The man whose name was your first thought in the morning and the final afterthought in the night. The man you were coincidentally in love with.

Living with him would entail being around him a lot more than you could handle. Waking and sleeping and eating in the same house as him, spending your days off together, bickering about bills, take-out, and the TV remote’s ownership, doing things that only couples got to do, and of course, sharing a bathroom, which on its own meant seeing him parade through the cramped little space of your apartment in nothing but a soggy towel, hair slick and teeth beaming as he’d be asking if you’d like to join him in the shower—

You hit the break on these thoughts and pressed your forehead flat against both palms, feeling the heat exuding through your fingers. You were only able to keep this relationship platonic because of the distance he put between you. If he were to suddenly close it, what would come of you? How on earth would you be able to hold back?

“Don’t you want me?”

“Huh?” you bit at the straw again, snapping it in half.

“I said, you hate the idea of living with me that much?”

Toji certainly didn’t mince his words, but the way he was looking at you, brows furrowing and lips quivering into a frown despite the edge in his tone, almost made it seem as if hearing your rejection out loud would hurt him, and because of that, you had no choice, but to shake your head in denial. You wanted this. More than words could express, you wanted to be with him like that, even if you refrained from disclosing that truth.

You wanted him.

“What about your girlfriends? Wouldn’t they be against you living with some woman?”

“Nah, I’m done with that. Done with all of ‘em.”

“But my apartment is too small. I don’t think it’d suit you—”

“I’ll manage,” he cut you off.

“I don’t even have a second bed-”

“We can always share,” he smirked, letting out a light-hearted chuckle as he watched color paint your cheeks. “Couch is fine, too. So, whaddya say, roomie?”

“…Fine,” you conceded, very well knowing you’d come to regret this decision. “But we need to set some ground rules! No trashing the apartment, no throwing your ‘work tools’ all over the place, no smoking, no drinking, no loud music, and no bringing in random women. No starting fights either! You’ll help around and pay half of what’s needed, so no gambling your money away. Those are my terms.”

“You drive a hard bargain, roomie,” Toji said, balancing his chin atop his elbow. “Fine by me. Told you I’m done with half those things anyway, and I don’t mind helping you with anything. I mean that.”

But I could help. I could make you feel really good, Y/N.

His words from that night still lingered in your mind like an unfulfilled promise, and when he phrased it like that, you couldn’t help but be reminded of how good his hands felt that night, creeping all over your skin as if he owned it— as if he owned you.

“G-good!” you said, picking up a fry off his tray and tossing it in your mouth, lest you said something stupid.

“No one taught you stealing other people’s food is rude?” Toji shot you a glare unequal to your crime.

“It’s not stealing if you are done with it!” you protested. “You haven’t touched your fries in over ten minutes now.”

His tongue clicked against his mouth’s roof, producing a series of “tsk” sounds while he shook his head in disapproval. “Didn’t take ya for such a brat, Y/N. Disrespecting me in my face right after we came to an agreement? That’s some bad business ethics.”

You rolled your eyes at his comment, barely keeping yourself from groaning. “I’m so terribly sorry, sir. I shouldn’t have stolen your esteemed fries, sir. Won’t ever happen again, sir. Please allow me to express my profound remorse, sir.”

Although Toji knew you only addressed him as such to get on his nerves, he was still pleased enough to grace with you an unsuspecting smile, seconds before you shoved a ketchup-covered potato against his mouth, smudging the left corner of his lips in a way akin to that of his right corner scar. He blinked, clouds of fury gathering in the bleakness of his eyes and cheeks puffing up, painting the most adorable expression you’d ever seen him wear.

“So cute,” you gushed, unable to suppress a hearty laughter that agitated him even more, red blooming across his cheeks— most likely by the lack of oxygen, you interpreted.

“Fucking brat,” he hissed, dipping the last of his fries in ketchup and then stuffing your mouth with it before you could even react. “I’ll show ya how it’s done!” he declared, your lips puckering against his fingers, condiment spreading all over like lipstick. His other hand forced your head in place, stilling your chin for him to work on his masterpiece, making a much bigger mess out of you than you had made of him.

“Hmphmmph!” you hummed while Toji laughed, a deep sound that reverberated straight from his guts, his eyes glinting along with his teeth in sheer joy that convinced you to give up so as to not spoil his fun. It was rare to see him genuinely happy.

“That should teach ya to behave,” he spat, smugness in every aspect of his features as he pressed his thumb onto his mouth, cleaning the ketchup off with a lick. “But you did address me properly, so you’ve earned the right to choose. Napkin or my lips? Which one?”

Stupefied as you were, you didn’t understand the full context of his question until you felt the sudden warmth of his mouth flutter over your skin, the tip of his tongue sloppily gathering the leftover ketchup off your right cheek. Your jaw popped open, a small gasp escaping as a result of his action.

“Too slow,” Toji whispered, hooded green eyes peering right into yours. “I’ll ask again. Napkin or my lips? What’s it gonna be, doll?”

“N-n-n-napkin!” you must have stuttered at least a thousand times before forming a comprehensible answer. He was so close that if he tilted his head any closer your lips were sure to touch. “P-please get me a napkin.”

“Please?” he chuckled, acting as if was really going to kiss you and then pulling away. “Be right back.”

Even after Toji let go, you could still feel the weight of his thumb holding you down, your eyes zeroing in on his black sweater as he set off for the other side of the room where the napkin and condiments stand was located. You heard a few whispers coming from beside your table, catching three pairs of eyes shooting daggers right at your back.

“Don’t they have a home?” a woman’s voice echoed first.

“Kids these days…” a man added.

“Honey, don’t look at their sinfulness, it’s the devil’s work.” A second woman concluded.

You were on the verge of experiencing a cardiac arrest, and you were pretty darn sure you would have if Toji hadn’t returned with the napkins in time, his hand snatched by yours as you forcefully dragged him out of the place, spelling frantic apologies at whoever was listening.

Once you’d made it outside, you sighed in relief, winter’s viciousness coming as a much-needed slap across your face. You took in a few breaths, letting go of his hand and padding a few steps away from the store’s windows, afraid you were still the focus of their attention. Toji followed, one hand stuffed inside his jeans pocket, while the other held the duffel bag over his shoulder in a lazy manner.

“Can you give me a lift to work?” you managed to ask, dodging his stare even as he stepped to the front.

“I would, but I can’t. Gave the car away.”

“You did what?”

Nothing about your reaction was funny in any shape or form, but he seemed amused enough to break into a soft chuckle, his eyes, too, softening ever so slightly.

“Planning to walk around town like a bloodsucker?” he asked, bringing a napkin to wipe your lips with greater care than you’d think. “How dirty,” he cooed, gently tapping at the center. “Next time, I won’t ask for permission to kiss you, roomie. Let’s go.”

“W-Where?” your voice came out so frail that you doubted he’d heard your question, his bag bouncing over his taut body with every step he took outside the parking lot.

“You asked for a ride, didn’t ya? Come.”

A/N: Launching a new series because I have so many feelings bottled up that I'm in danger of farting hearts and rainbows and shit. Decided to take the time off and write this fic for myself cause I needed it, but then I thought why not share it with the world? First time writing for Jujutsu Kaisen and Toji in particular, so hopefully it's received well!

[cringefaecompilation]

not to dunk on junior year again but i am noticing a pattern here with the treatment of certain storytelling elements here.

both bell’s hells and the ratgrinders were pcs that gained sapience. the difference is that the ratgrinders were villains and the hells are heroes.

one of the most love-it-or-hate-it aspects of campaign 3 is that it does not only focus on the main 7 or 8 characters and everybody else is tossed to the wayside unless they benefit them like usual. all npcs (with downfall, that's including the gods!) deserve a chance to have their story told and they are all written to be that. the generic runaway prince you have to help escape to a life of freedom! the cute little helper robot npc! generic spooky evil minions based on public domain monsters! the quirky quest-giving fae! the rough and tumble hired goon! the brave captain of the guard protecting a strong lady in charge!  yes, even imogen, who in any other story would be the sad little abandoned daughter of the bbeg who would mourn the hero killing her mother but understand that the hero had to do what needed to be done.

and again, you don’t have to like it!

but there is a weird sort of thing i noticed amongst all the critical role c3 criticism that reminded me of people defending fhjy. an undercurrent of insisting that all the ratgrinders (who were teenagers. who were groomed and then murdered.) were pure evil spoiled brats and just wanted to be handed everything on a platter because they didn’t deserve what the main cast earned their place as the main characters and made passive aggressive posts saying things to the tune of you know they’re evil right. very Watsonian with a staunch refusal to look at a Doylist explanation. it got so bad to the point where people were insisting that if you liked the ratgrinders and sympathized with them then you were a fascism apologist.

astoundingly enough c3 criticism has only scraped the surface of this sort of overdramatic accusation, but it goes in the opposite direction. if you like where the story is going and how it's being told, then you’re not a real critical role fan. the story should have just been about the characters fighting evil fae or just wiping out the ruby vanguard and everyone in it without all this stupid introspective discussion on power because it’s retconning the gods being bad guys! grey morality sucks, why can’t good guys just be good? they all feel like npcs except for imogen because she’s the only one with a chosen birthright!

(of course, if they say that last part out loud, that might not look so good for them)

 yes, we know the gods are imperfect. that’s what we’ve been saying this whole time. but all these passive aggressive gifsets of liam-as-orym saying that the gods aren’t pure evil and it’s stupid to think so or laura and matt ooc saying that the gods have a grey area don’t mean fucking jack if you turn around and insist the gods have zero flaws and everything they do is good, actually and Aeor Had It Coming.

important caveats:

the actors on d20 could not react to things they were doing in the moment. they were tired after filiming 3 episodes back to back and wrapped up their season faster than usual to join the sag-aftra strike. i am aware of this.

yes i know that d20 is a comedy improv series! that does not prevent it from having deep themes and character introspection! ayda aguefort and zelda donovan still very much exist and had their own arcs despite being npcs!

yes the ratgrinders were working with a man trying to kill and replace a goddess and yes he is a colonizing twat. however, doesn’t that also make it the fandom’s insistence that liking the kids is bad and fascistic but making ship art of him and the other teacher that killed all of them is totally okay? rules for he but not for thee? 

[happymetalgirl]

Rating Christmas Songs

Yep, it’s that time of year we get inundated wherever we go with mostly shitty Christmas music, usually the same stuff as the years before and the many years before. There are some songs among the barren crop of overplayed tunes that I think are pretty enjoyable, but for the most part I feel pretty confident that most of us are just putting up with the vast majority of the holiday playlist (I mean no one is dying to play any of these songs any other time of year, so they can’t be that great), so it’s time to set the record straight.

Here’s a rating of a few of the season’s musical staples and some brief reasons behind them. I’m sure I’m missing a few classics, but do feel free to bring them up and I will offer my thoughts on them. Granted these songs all have dozens, of not hundreds or thousands of versions, so I’m kind of going by an average of what I generally hear, not the dubstep remix version or even my favorite version necessarily.

-

“Jingle Bells”

The classic, easy to sing, easy to play on whatever instrument, upbeat childhood Christmas song. It’s hard to mess this one up, and I’m just glad it’s not trying to get all overly serious about Christmas as many of the songs further down this list do. But I mean, it’s fucking “Jingle Bells”, who actually gives a shit about this plinky-ass song.

5/10

“O Holy Night”

This one’s cool the first several years you hear it because it sounds pretty grand and epic, but it does wear off after awhile. Still, I’d rather hear this song than most, and I’ve yet to hear it truly butchered. So cheers to that!

7/10

“Jingle Bell Rock”

The failed swaggering “update” or cousin of the classic children’s Christmas song, it’s one of those songs that sounds like a bunch of upper class white folks sipping wine and putting on the usual façade of in-person Facebook-style humble bragging and life-highlighting about their year for the family they’ve not flexed on all year or since Thanksgiving. The song though is so drab and seemingly intentional sucked of lol the fun the kid’s song had, and in its place is just overly drolly Sinatra-imitation with no spirit at all. It’s the definition of background music, and it’s for the worst kind of background. Dancing to it sure as hell sucks. If you’re hearing this song, you’re probably not having as much fun as you’re supposed to be for a song that’s supposedly more “rock”.

2/10

"O Tanenbaum"

While his semi-jazzed-up approach that characterizes the rest of the soundtrack still seeps into this song, I’ve always loved the more stripped back piano-centric approach that Vince Guaraldi takes with this song on the classic A Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack. The simple and sweet lullaby-esque melody at the core of the song really works well with the instrumentally minimal approach (which I do hear most often) and it evokes a sense of very sweet nostalgia (for me at least), and I can’t not like it.

9/10

“Angels We Have Heard on High”

You know I’ve heard some pretty alright versions of this song when it’s pushed toward its more energetic side. That over the top run on “glOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoria” tends to be the make-or-make moment of the song, and when a singer or choir commits to it and goes all out, it can sound pretty rad; I’m sure some power metal band somewhere out there has put a decent spin on it. The rigid, traditional delivery I hear more often, though, sadly sounds more often like it’s had the life sucked out of it.

7/10

“Silent Night”

Probably my favorite of the soft Christmas songs, just soulful melodies abound here and written in a way that hasn’t encouraged too many stupid renditions.

9/10

“Santa Baby”

This song is just fuckin’ weird, and I get the place of romance it’s coming from lyrically: finally dropping the charade of Santa Claus and being romantic with the speaker’s husband after putting on the act for the children. It’s cute and endearing, but god is it always so weirdly sung, in a hyperseductive baby voice, not subtle at all, and kind of not fitting with the kind of sweet endearing romanctic tone you would think it’d be carrying if you just read the lyrics. There are definitely worse Christmas/holiday romance songs, and I can definitely imagine this song being performed more sweetly than it usually is.

6/10

“Hark! the Herald Angels Sing!”

This. Song. Is. A. Banger. Glorious and triumphant as shit! It sounds good slow and fast, but definitely best when it’s played bold and loud, as opposed to some contrived-ass attempt at a ballad. This song feels like finishing a marathon. I’d pay to hear Khemmis do this fuckin’ song.

10/10

“Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”

Sinatra’s version of the song is probably the most famous at this point, and as a consequence, the very title I think tends to invoke his signature smooth delivery on its own. I used to hate this one, but these days I find its naturally soothing character much more welcoming, god, especially this year. I can see why some find it to droll and sloggy, but I think it’s a nice wind-down tune.

7/10

“Last Christmas”

You know, the original synth-pop version by Wham! isn’t too bad on its own; George Michael’s delivery is pretty heartfelt and I can see why it’s become such modern Christmas staple. However, in the context of Christmas background music, that repetitive chorus refrain that seems to be the only lyric anyone knows in the song, gets really grating when it’s the only thing that sticks out, the more scaled-back delivery of the verses aiding their being buried in the chatter with your eggnog-sipping relatives. Furthermore, I’ve yet to hear a cover of the song less dry than sandpaper. Positive points to the original only.

6/10

“Away in a Manger”

This song certainly gets points for its strong narrative consistency, but aside from the “the stars in the sky” line, the melody is really really lame, and infantile in a bad way, and I have yet to hear a version that doesn’t sound like it was done by or similar to an apathetic children’s choir. It’s that quintessential song that every church kindergarten choir gets forced to sing because it’s nice and slow and narrow-range that all the kids look absolutely braindead singing. Not that it’s ever the kids’ fault or anything, it’s just a boring-ass song whose weak-ass strategy hinges on a bunch of 5-year-olds getting into something they clearly don’t give a shit about.

4/10

“The Little Drummer Boy”

You know, I could envision a slow-building post-rock-esque version of this song being pretty cool, but to date, all I have heard is stiff corny solo vocal delivery a la Angela from The Office and haphazard attempts at injecting tons of energy into the song that don’t really fix the kooky melody at the core of it. I swear you can always hear whoever is singing it getting red in the face from the needless intensity.

3/10

"Christmas Time Is Here"

Another solid cut from the soundtrack to A Charlie Brown Christmas, its rather simple instrumental foundation serves as a pretty solid introductory piece for the season; it feels so much like welcoming in the winter. And then of course the jazz embellishments on the instrumental version are some of the best in the Christmas genre, though listening to the soundtrack these days makes me wonder what it would be like if a more bombastic and dynamic jazz band took these songs on a more wild ride. I would love to hear that.

8/10

“Joy to the World”

It’s a little bit cheesy, but I kinda appreciate how ridiculously celebratory this tune is. It’s another one that I think would be interesting to hear Khemmis do a quick cover of, despite the religious theme that doesn’t really fit into their style. At the very least, it always sounds fun or, indeed, joyous.

7/10

“We Three Kings”

I’m not convinced anyone cares about this song.

5/10

“The First Noel”

This is another one of those songs whose runny melody tends to lead to it being delivered so often way too seriously, never really all too fun or worthy of the seriousness either.

3/10

“O Come, O Come Emanuel”

This is another one of those songs that, on the surface, seems more genuine with its minor key and often stoic delivery, and that definitely makes it better than the vast majority of Christmas songs, but the melody and lyrics are a bit oddly mismatched, and the melody that serves as the key appeal in the song does wear thin as the years go on. Nevertheless, I always do seem to find a cool new version ever year or two.

7/10

“Do You Hear What I Hear?”

Goddamn this is such a goofy-ass song. Who the hell made this? I cannot take it seriously. One point for all the kids for the apt “do you smell what I smell?”

1/10

“Mary Did You Know?”

Again, who wrote these lyrics? Like, in the story Mary made up to explain her out-of-wedlock pregnancy, that was kind of the main thing, that this kid would do some crazy shit. I can’t take this song seriously either, especially when it gets the goofy overly operatic treatment.

3/10

“Santa Claus Is Coming to Town”

It’s another one of those songs that literally just says what Santa Claus does. Musically it’s catchy-ish, but I mean it’s about Santa Claus, and it’s so often sung in that overly serious, toned down Motown style that no kid likes. I never liked hearing it then, and I don’t now.

3/10

“12 Days of Christmas”

Structurally iconic, this song really doesn’t offer anything beyond that; have you ever tried listening to someone doing the whole thing? It gets old really fast, and the fact that the “halfway” point in the song, the six geese a-laying, isn’t actually the halfway point, because the verses get longer and longer... fuck! The only thing this song is good for is for structuring workouts around, nothing regarding listening to the song. It gets one point for its utility.

1/10

“It Came upon a Midnight Clear”

We really are in a stretch of trash Christmas songs right now. I don’t think this is anyone’s favorite Christmas song. It’s so lethargic and sleep-inducing, I’m falling asleep just thinking about it.

3/10

“We Wish You a Merry Christmas”

Eh, it’s kinda not a really important song. At least it wakes you up, but apart from throwing some energy into the Christmas playlist that many are often desperate for, it’s just a cheery addition of holiday-themed white noise.

4/10

“What Child Is This?”

Finally some good fucking food. I’ve heard some baller versions of this captivatingly grand song, whose accidentals and minor key really make it one of the more interesting listens during the holiday season. I would dig an Opeth cover or a Pallbearer cover, or... a Khemmis cover.

8/10

“Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!”

This is just one of those standard, old-timey, inoffensive season-themers. It’s alright, I’ve never heard any version of it that really blows my mind.

5/10

“Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”

This one is almost indistinguishable from, but significantly less annoying than, “Jingle Bell Rock” and is similarly stiff in a way that it’s clearly not meant to be.

3/10

“White Christmas”

This might take the cake for the sleepiest Christmas song out there. It is SLOW, like Bell Witch should ironically do a 20-minute-long cover of it just to see how it goes.

4/10

“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”

The shopping mall theme song. It’s always given that Sinatra treatment and it only barely fits well enough into that style.

4/10

“Feliz Navidad”

This one always feels like it needs to be sung with a big, cheerful group to capture the liveliness that its main appeal is based in, which puts it at a distinct disadvantage this year. Still, it’s always a fun, sometimes even bouncy song to play during the holiday season.

7/10

“Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer”

I do actually welcome the absurd narrative that has somehow made itself one of the season’s ironic staples, and its slightly dark humor makes for a nice change of pace in the playlist with its upbeat, campy humor.

6/10

“Deck the Halls”

Fa la la la la, la la la no.

Annoying as fuck: 2/10

“Frosty the Snowman”

God, this song should be way more cheery and kid-friendly than it is. I mean, I’m sure kids don’t mind it, but it’s just yet ANOTHER one of those songs that can’t escape its old-timey suit-and-tie incarnation for the liveliness it desperately needs.

4/10

“God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen”

One of the more compositionally clunky of the well-known minor-key Christmas songs, this one unfortunately tends to show why minor-key songs are generally a weird fit for theme. I have heard a good few modern renditions though that make the song worth keeping around.

6/10

“Jingle in the Jungle”

This one’s for the real ones out there. “Jingle in the Jungle” is not a real Christmas song per se, but it pushes the boundaries; it’s courageous. The song comes from the television series, Bob’s Burgers, in a stressful Christmas-themed episode where the musically adventurous son of the titular character, Gene, burns out his dad’s cell phone battery waiting on hold for a radio station to request this song. The phone dies and he does not get the chance to request the song, but a Christmas miracle occurs, and the station decides to play the obscure, bongo-laden song anyway, and it sure is a fun minute-long diddy.

8/10

“Wonderful Christmastime”

Paul McCartney’s peppy Christmas tune that only kinda accomplishes its light-hearted goal is simply one of many throwaway inoffensive modern Christmas songs that seems to have only gained cultural traction due to it being repetitive and simplistic af, and being made by a Beatle.

5/10

“Happy Xmas (War Is Over)”

Well it would only make sense to have the battle of the Beatles here with John Lennon’s standout Christmas track, a far more soulful, bombastic, and triumphant song that echoed his idealistic spirit in a way that makes this song not all too different from his standout solo works and compositions with The Beatles. It’s a warm, hopeful song that draws from a grounding in the harshness of reality rather than some escapist fantasies about Santa or religion. Despite the acknowledgement of the ills of the world, Lennon’s vision of Christmas and his wish for the world is a day of recognition of love and unity, which is purer than 99% of the dogmatic or materialistic Christmas music above, and definitely the song right below this one.

9/10

“The Christmas Shoes”

Alright, rubbing the hands together, we’re coming to the end here, with this fucking song. It’s not the most famous Christmas song, thank God, but when I heard it for the first time, I was immediately repelled by the saccharine melody, uncannily blank-faced delivery, and sappy lyrics, but it’s one of those special songs that gradually reveals several layers of shit the more you fixate on it. For the uninitiated, the song came out in the year 2000, from the Christian band NewSong; it’s an aggressively sentimental holiday ballad with a bit of pop country vocal flair that only adds to the sinister hokey-ness of the lyrics. And that really is the ugliest facet of this song; as sickeningly cheesy as the music is, the simple lyrics here are more morbid and more disgusting than the grossest brutal death metal songs. The song is a simple narrative about a poor boy buying his sick mom some nice shoes on Christmas Eve so she can look nice for Jesus when she dies, tonight, on Christmas Eve. Yeah, it’s fucking sickening. The song is narrated from the perspective of a man in the store when the boy is buying the shoes and the narrator offers to buy the shoes for him, and he muses vaguely and confusingly on his generosity and Jesus being the “true” meaning of Christmas. Yes, there are so many questions being begged by this narrative. Why would Jesus give a shit about the shoes? Why is getting shoes this divine Christmas gesture? How do these shoes even come close to offsetting the pain and suffering and loss this family is suffering. This is like the opposite of John Lennon’s “Happy Xmas” in that it’s offering a pathetic consolation for the cruelty of a world where a loving God apparently offers only a stranger’s mild and momentary generous gesture for a poor family in the thralls of a mother’s illness. It’s grounded in the same reality that John Lennon presents, but it whitewashes it and minimizes the suffering in a manipulative way to shoehorn a rather cliche reminder to adhere to religious dogma and to keep your mind pure and holy and only on Jesus. A plain-faced telling of the narrative on its own makes it seem kind of benign, but the weirdly sappy tone of it all does a pretty poor job of hiding how contrived the emotion is and how unnatural it all is. Every facet of the lyrics is crafted to maximize the superficial primal tug at the heartstrings; it’s supposed to feel extremely tender and sweet, and aside from being completely transparently manufactured, the response it delivers to the story it sets up is creepily unhuman, the opposite of a natural response to the details of what the song presents, and its misplaced sense of justice makes the song a pretty apt representation of so much wrong with evangelicals’ attitudes surrounding Christmas.

0/10

“All I Want for Christmas Is You”

by Mariah Carrey. Ending on a positive note. Probably the best and most classic modern Christmas song to come out in my lifetime, it’s a sweet, romantic, upbeat love tune that really captures the best aspects of the holiday season. Never mind the relatives and their dumb political views and drama or the religious nonsense that people get so disingenuously up in arms about, or the consumerism. Christmas at its best is a time to appreciate love, and this song gets it.

9/10

And that is it, for me, I obviously know I will never be able to rate every Christmas/holiday song ever.

I had some time, so I had a little fun and charted the 38 semi-serious ratings of Christmas songs here, which I will also be doing with the 200-something metal albums I’ve been reviewing and now rating at the end of the year. Should be interesting. Now 38 isn’t a particularly huge sample of the huge swath of Christmas songs, nor was it random (I just listed a bunch of songs I was familiar with). It didn’t produce the normal curve I somewhat expect for the larger sample of metal albums later at the end of the year; rather, it shows a two-peak pattern, which could be due to the sample size, or maybe it just illustrates a somewhat unsurprising polarized sample of opinions on Christmas songs. The songs that I remember that are (mostly) pretty common, I either really like or really don’t like, most of the songs are not in the middle. These were songs I have heard for a long time and remembered pretty vividly, so I’ve developed some relatively strong opinions on them. Anyway, look at this graaaaaaphh.

[jmsebastian]

Middle Child Syndrome: Fatal Frame III

Fatal Frame III: The Tormented sits in a weird place among the entries in the classic horror series. After the novelty of the first game and the refinements of the second, The Tormented starts to retread some very familiar territory. There are more old, abandoned and haunted mansions, more hostile ghosts that need exorcizing, and the same Camera Obscura with which you take pictures to solve puzzles and rid said haunted mansions of the undead. The general idea of the game is identical to its predecessors. If you’ve played through the entire series, you know that there is a familiar sense of core elements and a consistent quality that invites comparisons to the NES line of Mega Man games. As such it’s easy to overlook the game as just another sequel that does more of the same. Done and done.

That would really be selling the game short, though. While not nearly as celebrated as Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly, or as controversial a release as The Maiden of Black Water, The Tormented veers off the beaten path in surprising ways. Sure, you spend the majority of your time doing the exact same things you do in every Fatal Frame game, but the story has a more personal side to it. It also isn’t all haunted house all the time. There are things to do outside of playing paparazzi to the angry spirits of people who met untimely and gruesome ends. There are characters that you can interact with, and loads of quiet time.

I haven’t talked at great length about the story of the other Fatal Frame games for a couple of reasons. First, they are all set up as mysteries. Going into a lot of detail about them would diminish the rewarding sense of discovery you get when you uncover more journal entries or newspaper clippings that allow you to fit the timeline of the story’s events together. Second, the stories being told were never all that satisfying to me. Learning exactly how the ancient ritual that keeps the spirits of hell away got botched for the third or fourth time loses a bit of its luster. There’s nothing wrong with that framework, and you have to expect it to some degree with a series that is self-referential and takes place in some semblance of a timeline. Still, the possibilities to go beyond the failed ritual scenario have been surprisingly unexplored. Fatal Frame III makes a valiant attempt.

In The Tormented, you follow Rei Kurosawa in the aftermath of the loss of her fiance, Yuu Asou. Rei bears the responsibility of Yuu’s death, as she feels it was her inattentive driving that caused the accident he was killed in. Having survived the accident, Rei suffers from tremendous guilt. That is a heavy stage to set and contrasts wildly with the previous setups of “my brother is lost and I think he might be in this creepy mansion” as seen in the original game, and “we were running through the woods and now we’re in some creepy, abandoned village that appeared out of nowhere”. The themes in the series have always leaned very hard into dark and disturbing territory. Who could forget the slightly hinted at taboo relationship between twins Mio and Mayu from Crimson Butterfly, or the horrifically unethical medical experiments performed on mental patients in Mask of the Lunar Eclipse? Where the series had previously begun its games with big, open-ended mysteries, III was the first to begin its story with such a specific focus on the details that ground both the lead into the plot and the character whose the lens the player will be experiencing the plot through.

Rei’s grief and guilt are the emotional frameworks upon which The Tormented is built. That subtitle essentially gives the theme of the game (and the entire series, for that matter) away right off the bat. It’s one thing to have an interesting story framework, though. It’s another to elevate that story through the integration of its themes into something the player can take part in. To that end, Fatal Frame III is comprised of two distinct phases. There’s the dream phase, where Rei (and occasionally other characters) explores The Manor of Sleep and uncovers information about various ghosts she encounters while there. This is also where the player does all of their ghost hunting with the Camera Obscura.

There’s also the waking phase. This phase is set in Rei’s home, which she shares with Miku Hinasaki. Miku is the protagonist of the first Fatal Frame and she works for Rei as an assistant. While awake, the player can develop certain pictures taken while in the dream state in her home’s dark room. Those photos can then be given to Miku to investigate the characters or events revealed in the film. The other main component of waking up is simply to take a breather from the harrowing experiences of investigating the mansion while eluding the tattooed woman hell-bent on tracking Rei down. Having structured quiet time makes the difference between the emotional highs and lows of the game more pronounced and even. The house, taking the role of refuge, completely recontextualizes the nature of the mansion exploration as set forth in the previous entries in the series. Where before the game’s protagonists were forced deeper and deeper into exploration in an effort to find what they were looking for or free themselves, Rei gets to act more like a spelunker. She explores the same horrifying locations and situations as the characters in the other games, but she does so with a rope (somewhat) firmly tied back to reality.

The cyclical nature of sleeping and waking is then twisted over time. The safe haven of Rei’s home, which included having Rei’s health restored and her film replenished, begins to feel less safe over time, especially as night falls. Apparitions tucked away in corners can be seen flickering in and out of existence, the constant rainfall outside acts as somewhat of a psychological barrier to leaving the house. It’s as though Rei’s dreams are forcing their way into her consciousness slowly over the course of the game, which is a more oppressively sinister emotional path to walk for both Rei and the player. What was once a welcomed relief erodes into more uncertainty, cementing the effects of the trauma that Rei undergoes.

The subtlety of Rei’s descent into the trappings of guilt is propped up in some unexpected ways. There are the aforementioned hauntings in Rei’s home introduced over time, but there are more subtle touches that magnify the effects of her emotional deterioration. Elements as omnipresent as the UI seem oddly understated compared to the games it’s sandwiched between. Compare how busy the viewfinder is of a mildly upgraded camera is in Fatal Frame II and a similarly upgraded camera in III.

Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly

Fatal Frame III: The Tormented

The highlighting around the reticle, which indicates the charge of your spirit power, is so subtle that upon picking this game back up again, I completely missed it for the better part of my first fight. I’m not exactly sure why the Camera Obscura has such a minimalist representation when the trend in the rest of the series was to amplify its feedback to 11. It’s not even like it fits in with the rest of the UI features, which saw more shortcut buttons and menu options than previously provided. It certainly seems that breaking immersion wasn’t particularly on the list of worries, so the only options left seem to be that the developers just wanted to give the player more screen real estate with which to frame the ghosts they would be taking pictures of, or they felt that toning down the flashing lights and alarm bells would keep the mood somber, preventing it from clashing horribly with the tone of the narrative. It could be both at the same time. Whether intentional or accidental, Tecmo completely nailed it.

Being the third installment of a series means there were plenty of opportunities to adjust and fine tune features that might have been underdeveloped in previous games. There is still some redundancy in how the player takes pictures, for example, being able to use either the R1 or X buttons, but that’s much better than the three possible buttons used in the previous title. A big improvement was getting rid of having two camera viewfinder control options active at the same time. Fatal Frame and Fatal Frame II allowed for movement of the Camera Obscura’s viewfinder with both the analog stick and directional pad, an odd choice considering the PlayStation 2 had integrated analog control built in from the beginning. The Tormented fixes that, leaving control simply with the left analog stick. By doing this, they freed up the D-pad to be used for swapping film types during combat without forcing the player into a series of menus, which would take them out of the action and ruin the pacing.

Fatal Frame III is full of these small improvements. The system menu options were moved from the Start button to Select, which allowed for the game menu options to be moved from Triangle to Start, which then allowed the Camera Obscura to be raised or lowered with Triangle instead of Circle, putting it much closer to R1, which is used as the shutter button. The map, a huge time saving and confusion busting tool, was moved to the L2 button, which went completely unused in previous entries. One of the best improvements involved implementing an older constraint from the first game that had been “corrected” for the sequel.

Film in Fatal Frame is finite. If the player does a poor job managing their film either in combat or when taking pictures of wandering ghosts or other things of interest, they can either run out completely (admittedly difficult to do as there is more than enough scattered around the mansion), or more worryingly, run low or out of the most rare and powerful film types because their damage capacities weren’t maximized. The team at Tecmo realized that there was a real possibility that players could put themselves into an unwinnable situation, and to make sure that couldn’t happen in the sequel, they introduced a type of film that was infinite. Its capture power was very weak to compensate for having an unending supply, but it was a nice safeguard against both running out of film completely and also against being forced to use more powerful film when it wasn’t really necessary.

Fatal Frame III rides the line between these two extremes. All film types have a limited supply, like in the original game. Two of those types, Type-7 and Type-14, refill to a set amount when Rei wakes up from her dream hours. This accomplishes the goal of heightening the tension of each dream by forcing players to be conscious of how much film they’re using and for what, and also provides an extra dose of relief once players reach the end of a dream segment. There’s an additional benefit to aiding players in mentally pacing the game, as they can form a pretty good idea of about how far into a segment they are based on how much film they’ve consumed, assuming they haven’t gone above and beyond in exploration and searched out every possible film drop possible. The mixing of old and new series ideas demonstrates the importance of looking at the games in a franchise holistically, as there can be great ideas tucked away in entries that can easily get overlooked in the rush to keep things fresh.

Unfortunately, refinements don’t really make for huge selling points, which may be part of the reason why the game is underrepresented when it comes to the series as a whole. It looks the best and typically plays the best of the PS2 games, but not because it made any huge design overhauls. It simply examined what it was that players most often spent their time doing in Fatal Frame and made those features more logical and accessible. It’s as if the Camera Obscura viewfinder’s visual design was a representation of the elegance that this game was going for.

For all that it gets right, Fatal Frame III does, of course, have flaws. Those flaws largely derive from the expectation that players of the game are familiar with the series. Aside from relying upon up the stories of previous games, it also borrows much of its level design from them as well. Revisiting levels familiar to seasoned veterans of a series can be a nice surprise. The Tormented takes this idea to its logical conclusion and basically creates a new game using the locations of the previous two games. The Manor of Sleep, for all intents and purposes, is a combination of Crimson Butterfly’s Lost Village, and Fatal Frame’s Himuro Mansion. There’s really nothing wrong with this in principle, but Tecmo’s reliance on familiar architecture allowed them to slip a little with regard to guiding the player along the right path. Far too often it feels as though players need to rely on past experiences with the games in order to figure out where to go because Fatal Frame III doesn’t really bother to give them adequate clues. This is an intermittent problem. The first quarter of the game is fine, and there’s even one section when controlling Miku where the player has to rely on audio cues to figure out where to go which works extremely well. There are other sections, however, such as Hour VI, where guidance is a little less straightforward. You don’t really take any pictures revealing other locations, there aren’t spirits walking about to point your way, you just have to wander around a bit until you stumble upon the place you’re supposed to be. It’s clunky and does a great disservice to the sections that are well planned out.

The difficulty of the game is another issue that normally wouldn’t be worth mentioning except that it’s tied to the lack of context clues seen in previous games. During Hour VII, Miku ventures into a crawl space beneath the house in order to reach a previously inaccessible area. This area of the map is set up beautifully by way of Rei commenting earlier in the game on her inability to pass through it if the player inspects the opening while in control of her. There’s also a later section where a ghost can be seen hanging out, her body contorted in an off-putting way. When it’s time for Miku to crawl through this space, the player is ready for something. With a set up that good, it’s a shame that the payoff is so weak. What the player finds is an incredibly difficult enemy to fight. While crawling, the game forces you into first-person mode, whether you have the camera raised or not. This limited view makes the ghost, who crawls around on all fours with the frantic pace of cockroach, very difficult to locate quickly. Her attacks are swift, as well. She approaches the player abruptly before pausing ever so slightly and ringing the neck of Miku.

Her spider-like ceiling walk is especially frightening.

It’s obvious there is something wrong with this encounter based on how little damage this ghost does to you upon each attack. If you fail to get a shutter chance on her (and you will), she hangs on to you for a long time. During that time, she drains a minuscule amount of life compared to even the weakest of enemies in other parts of the game. With such little health at risk, it suggests that players are not really meant to engage with this ghost at all, which makes one wonder why they bothered putting her in the game in the first place. After getting strangled weakly for the third or fourth time, I figured I’d just keep on crawling so I could get to my destination, which worked out perfectly. My constant movement made it so the ghost could no longer land hits on me, and she was unable to follow me out of the crawl space.

To say this whole section was a disappointment is an understatement. Because the situation is treacherous, it seems that Tecmo just couldn’t resist putting an enemy here, which would be fine if that enemy had animations that the player could deal with more comfortably. It doesn’t. To compensate for how difficult the timing is for landing shots in her, they simply made her incredibly weak, which takes away all tension from the situation. Players can fail time and time again on this fight without real risk of dying, so the overall scare factor drops to nothing. The animations no longer frighten once seen repeated fifty times. A better option would have probably been to have some clue that a ghost is nearby, but never actually reveal her. Having the player go into a confined space was already enough to ramp up the tension, so much so that actually executing on that tension made for the least scary scenario possible.

Another reason why this particular ghost encounter sticks out is that it occurs roughly halfway through the game. The halfway mark is where the game starts to falter a bit. Where it hits the pavement is in the sheer number of ghost hostile ghost encounters. There are tons. On top of the scripted fights, which must be completed to progress, ghosts can randomly pop up all over the place, even in areas once thought safe. There’s an element of surprise here that serves to undermine whatever sense of security a player might have developed when going through certain areas of the Manor of Sleep, but it becomes overkill almost immediately. Sometimes two ghosts can show up back to back, other times you might fight one, move on, then have the same ghost reappear during a backtrack to a different part of the mansion.

Having repeat ghosts already feels unsatisfying because it eliminates any sense of accomplishment the player had when taking them out the first time. The point of the Camera Obscura is to exorcize spirits, and if it isn’t actually accomplishing that, then the integrity of the narrative completely falls apart. The other major side effect of this is fatigue. The Fatal Frame games are not easy. Exploring takes time, the puzzles, though not mind melting, take a bit of thought or planning to complete. Throwing in fights every other room is daunting, reduces the impact of those encounters, and gives the player incentive to avoid them at all costs. This takes away opportunities to get points to level up the camera and additional abilities, crucial elements of the game that must be done in order to combat the spikes in difficulty. It’s a shame when games appear to actively discourage players from participating in the mechanics that make up the core of the experience, and The Tormented is quite guilty of this in several chapters.

The middle section of the game is also where the training wheels come off with regard to figuring out where to go, not something that makes a great deal of sense considering the amount of backtracking the players are required to put up with. Traveling back and forth between the same rooms dozens of times requires some guidance so that players don’t begin to wander about aimlessly. It’s inevitable that a player is going to run into some blocked doors or impassable spaces, but it doesn’t take hitting too many of these in a row before the adventure starts to fall flat and the feeling of frustration dominates the experience. As a general rule, leading the player on is something Fatal Frame III does really well. There’s a night where Miku’s destinations are signaled by the sound of singing. Locating the sound becomes the game, and it’s an interesting way to provide the player with the solution of where to go without simply jotting down the right room on the map. The uneven application of these unique guidance tricks makes the game feel longer than it is, and horror games are particularly damaged by wearing out their welcome.

Having a bit of a slump in the pacing is an issue, but can certainly be overlooked when viewing the game as a whole. What can’t be ignored is how Tecmo treats its main protagonist, Rei. It shouldn’t be a surprise that the developers responsible for the Dead or Alive series would have some issues regarding representations of women. Sadly, the Fatal Frame series is not free of this problem. With the protagonist of The Tormented being an adult woman, Tecmo was able to overtly sexualize her in a way that feels a lot more familiar to fans of Western horror movies (not to mention sexualization of the main antagonist, who goes bare-breasted throughout the game). Sure, you could read incestuous undertones into the relationship between twins Mayu and Mio from Fatal Frame II, but that served to make the characters more enigmatic and eerie, a reasonable thing to do for a horror game. The fanservice content that did exist was reserved for bonus content and was entirely optional. This is not so with Rei. Even jiggle physics make it into the game, if subtle. Rei’s breasts don’t heave or sway like Mai Shiranui when she runs or quick turns, but there is a distinct butt bounce that is noticeable when she runs. It can be hard to see as it requires the camera being placed close to Rei in an area where she would be moving away from the player’s view, but it’s definitely there, and it’s difficult to justify a reason for its existence. It ended up distracting me quite a lot once I’d noticed it. Maybe that doesn’t say something so flattering about me, but one has to wonder what the intent was with including it, as it seems animated too well to be accidental.

To further Re’s unfortunate portrayal, we get a scene of Rei taking a shower in a half-hearted attempt to convey her difficult time coping. It’s a bit difficult to empathize with her situation, though, when the scene is served with a very generous side of boob. It’s jarring because Rei is just an average woman who’s lost the person she loves most and feels immense guilt about it. She isn’t action star Aya Brea from Parasite Eve running around shooting mutated monsters with a shotgun. Trying to mix in a bit of sex appeal here just doesn’t sit well. The shower trope is repeated later on to more mixed results.

This scene is more Nightmare on Elm Street than Fatal Frame.

This mixed messaging doesn’t hurt the narrative to an irreparable degree, but it certainly does the game no favors, and when your main problem as a game is that you are easily overlooked, it’s this kind of objectification of its characters that makes passing the game by not feel like such a bad thing.

The biggest regret of the game is that its most dramatic moment, the showdown with the Tattooed Woman, has a fatal flaw. That flaw is an instant fail state. One hit deaths feel bad in pretty much every game, but for Fatal Frame, they are especially cheap. The series has these littered throughout, and normally they are easy enough to avoid. Maybe you get caught once, but after that, it’s a good lesson learned. Fatal Frame III decided it would make half of the final boss fight subject to them with a healthy dose of randomness to make the medicine go down. The fight begins normally, with the Tattooed Woman becoming hostile while also becoming vulnerable to your camera. Intermittently, however, she will transform the scene so that it takes on the black and white film grain look that’s been peppered throughout other Hours. During this time, the Woman appears in a random location and you must run from her until things go back to normal. The randomness of her appearance and her ceaseless pursuit of your character make avoiding her challenging, and sometimes, literally impossible. If you get touched, you die. Death at this stage is especially punishing because the player must quit out to the game’s main menu in order to reload their last save. If the last possible save point, the trek back to the boss room isn’t especially far, but it’s enough that the time going back for another try after a death caused without fault from the player really adds up. This is a horrible choice for any boss, let alone the final one.

For this fight alone, it’s hard to blame anyone who honestly hates this game. It’s so bad that it is hard to remember anything else about the game as you fight back the tears of frustration. Of the three games, The Tormented easily feels like the most difficult for me, and poor design decisions like this are a big reason why. It would be one thing if the difficulty had some semblance of fairness to it. Maybe the Tattooed Woman’s moveset could be especially varied or challenging. Maybe she would have a fairly simple moveset but hit very hard in order to punish impatient players with jumpy trigger fingers. Taking control away from players is great for instilling fear, but it’s equally good at instilling rage, which is really all this boss fight accomplishes. What’s amazing is that even upgrading my camera as much as possible and using Type Zero film exclusively, which is the most powerful in the game, I still died numerous times simply because I couldn’t turn around fast enough to avoid some grabby hands.

With all games, you have to weigh the good with the bad. Fatal Frame III’s lows are certainly low due to their feeling of cheapness with regard to eliciting thrills or titillation. Those lows, however, far from sink the game to the level that its reputation seems to have sunk it. Maybe the quick development of these games simply led to oversaturation. Half of the entire series was released in about a three year period, which is remarkable. With that, you’re going to see a lot of corners being cut. The Tormented lacked originality in its locations and ghosts, but it more than made up for those shortcomings through its unique use of those existing assets. From a lore perspective, it’s also crucial, as it expands on the original game’s story and incorporates elements from the second to create a cohesive fictional universe for the fans who really crave that kind of thing. Fatal Frame and Fatal Frame II are more complete games because they have the third game to connect all the dots, even if they didn’t really need to be connected in the first place.

The series would change drastically with its next iteration, moving away from the fixed camera, adopting a whole new control scheme, and abandoning the characters that had established it as one of the premier horror titles. Given that it never made it out of Japan, it’s hard to see those radical departures as being completely successful. The Tormented, then, sits in the kind of limbo that the player strives to make their way out of. It’s the point between staying true to what works and reinventing the wheel. What risks it took were overshadowed by where it played it safe, not unlike what happened to Capcom’s Resident Evil 3. There are far worse fates than good, if not spectacular. If you choose to play Fatal Frame III for yourself, you’ll come across plenty of them.

[ladyofmind]

October Wrap Up

Hey everyone! Sorry for the silence... been busier than even I can keep up with, and also found out that the last Music Monday I had a few weeks back- well it didn’t post so I was quieter than I intended to be...

But it is NaNoWriMo time now, so there should be time to settle in and post like mad to update you all, and write my 50k! After all, I have no plans to be anywhere this November. Fingers crossed nothing else goes crazy on me.

Without further chatter, game answers after the jump.

#CharactersHell

1- Rooms for rent above an active and lively bar, for as long as you like* (*Mgmt not responsible for any damage from the cat or other beings if you leave your door open/unlocked.)

2- Not in the expected way. Most of the monsters are the human Antags. The antags are motivated by jealousy and obsession. Other characters have their own personal demons, or else they aren’t really human...

3- Not real monsters, not really. The Antags are over the top in their issues, but they are rarer. Everybody has some kind of issue though.

4- Frost? That grumpy man is actually a bit of a softy inside… If not, Sly mixes up some ugly looking boozy milkshakes that are pretty tasty!

5- That would be the Antag. Tim is a sort of threat in waiting, one that slips around a bit like the snake he is. The incidents he is involved in are hard to figure out until after it happens...

6- My world is no different than our world. There is divinity in the form of God etc, but it really plays no part in my story.

7- Same world, same dire predictions. Only difference is, it’s a brothel, so one can assume they may already be in hell…

8- Most interesting job? That’s a toss up… It’s an interesting place to work in general, but I’m torn between Woods being in a band, or Tweety, the one in somewhat charge of all the other looney tunes….

9- Best Co-worker award goes to Malta. There is no one else likely to push, prod, and sometimes accidentally beat ya up to have a good time, while respecting limits. Unlike the constant party pusher Bebe, Malta can tell when you need the push, and when you just need a cuppa tea.

10- Most of the time, the networking person is Tweety, as everyone knows her and gets connected by her. But for this, I have to give it to the guys. Nira has a lot of connections from before bar life, music man Martin is always networking and improving his career, and Frost? Well the giant makes friends thru fights. Might not be a lot, but they are the best connections…

11- This is a little bit of everyone really. Malta, Frost, and others don’t do it intentionally, it’s more of a language barrier. Sly is the master of deflection to the point you still don’t know very much. That may be why Tweety sees him as an equal, as everyone assumes they know her, but they never know a thing. She doesn’t lie, just turns things around on ya.

12- Woods is about/has turned professional famous musician, depending on which book you read… Tweet is just really good at talking to people and getting everywhere from it.

13- Antags- Sofia has some fans yes. She’s a strange boss with a back story & has some loyal workers until she does things to mess that up (her MO). Tim on the other hand? Well, he’s liked for what his skills & the more unstable/broken sorts love him to obsession.

14- The Antags are good for backstabbing! Tim and Sophia work together for the mostly common goal, but in places there’s differences. For instance, a rigged auction is supposed to end in Tim’s favor. Doesn’t mean S can’t make more money off of him if he wants it that badly…

15- Tim gives me the creeps. There’s this thing he does that makes me feel violated too, so I know it will be good in the end… I just need recovery time after him.

16- Tweet isn’t monstrous… but it is a pain sometimes, writing for an always happy sort, even if you want to have her fight back against things.

17- Tim is as direct as a blunt log to the face can be. He’s more bull in the china shop. Sophia is the mastermind, making her puppets dance in that web way. You can 100% assume she’s behind something, but you’re hard pressed to prove it…

18- With Tim, smarts is the easy part. It’s Sophia you match wits with, if you have to at all…

19- Woods isn't really vicious… maybe some biting comments while holding a grudge. Tweet is always the “kill 'em with kindness” type

20- I think the side chars are very active in their own ways to push this story forward. Some are even pushy as hell!

21- Ok, so Frost isn't exactly wrathful towards the MC so much as ornery and wrathful at everyone… but he does blame Tweety for flaring his ulcer with her ideas.

22- Not all that hard for me, as I don’t force my characters into doing things they wouldn’t do anyway. I try to learn who they are first and go from there.

23- I don’t really use red herrings, not intentionally. There may be one or two accidentally...

24- So zen! I throw on some earphones blaring my playlist and forget that people exist. The absolute worst is when you’re writing so well, and then someone scares you by interrupting you!

25- I’m not really into the sweets. Once in a while, but mostly my writing runs off potato chips or pretzels. Crunchy and salty balances the romance writing well!

26- #FF #followfriday with interesting stories by: @nomdejillian @TGNeal @SkeptiCybrarian @marshawritesit

27- Halloween was fun when I was a kid. Now I enjoy making Halloween-y cookies and giving them out to people I like, since we never have trick or treaters where I live. One year per the Halloween cookie costume rules, I dressed in all grey with a bell on… Jingle bell rock ya’ll!

28- Not a prankster, so not very wrathful at all. Halloween isn’t a big deal near me.

29- Oh I think I did that already! False arrest of the sweet one anyone?

30- So this is a boost for our Co-Host @manual_arbanassi! His amazing, well rounded character work in #Tiogair is great. Plus he totally shares that character building with all of us with both this game and #CharactersTell!

31- After work where I have to avoid a kids book sale while having a bills closing day? Relax and maybe watch a Halloween-y movie. Really, I am more excited about #NaNoWriMo starting at midnight.

#SciFiNaNoPrep

1- Hi, Nicole here. I was fairly certain for #NaNo I would continue my #RedLetters #series, but this Mars idea won’t let go. It has an outline, so maybe this prep will help me change course?

2- For this Mars idea? 50K or whatever it takes to finish this idea. Definitely looking to start it.

3- It’s very similar in that it’s our Earth, and an exploration of the Mars planet we think we know.

4- The not so very distant future. My research says I need at least 4 years, so mid to late 2020’s

5- Planet Mars for about 90% of it. There’s a little Earth training time, and possibly other planet flash backs.

6- Both generally advanced Earth tech, and some stuff for Mars that feels like #spoilers (plus I need to sort that out –Note to self on more #prep!)

7- Haven’t quite named them… but I do know there’s some diversity and a female MC/narrator

8- That’s definitely a #spoiler! I can say that it’s a “greet the way you’re greeted” thing…

9- Oh, I’m showing my age here for sure… but like Sailor Mercury from Sailor Moon or the original Power Rangers Billy the blue ranger come to mind… for their smarts and calmness.

10- There are both Earth “children” and adults, plus some Martian life.

11- Earth customs, sure, all the standard ones. Martian customs fall into “show you, you decide what happens” things. Because the message/meanings are important sometimes.

12- #FF #followfriday with #scifi writers: @RagingCyclone @authorASMcGowan @mae_mckinnon and a bunch of people at #wipworldbuilders

13- I would say somewhere in between, as it largely depends on which side you see it from. Just because it’s Utopia to one may be dystopia to another. Similar to the grass being greener on the other side theory.

14- Earth politics are the same. Mars doesn’t have politics in the same way. They have more rule, order and understanding.

15- Mars is more science and study, so they are more guardians less lawyers in that sense. They have systems for everything, but mostly they do not have crime within their own ranks. Outsiders are a different story.

16- Oh lots! I am taking some of the known things about planets and life and tying it together to give credible conspiracy theory if you will. Might even include Nikola Telsa…

17- As Mars is a drier planet- with more wind storm, less water, the idea of hydro anything doesn’t work. Plus they have a better greenhouse process that makes planting in the ground useless.

18- There is really no focus on currency in this idea, as shooting for different themes, money being the root of trouble not one of them.

19- ATV type things above ground, underground tunnels with everything from walking to hovering transports.

20- I enjoy a reasonable time travel story. Not the type that appear there just to be there, or where the tech that travels person is hokey. More like Timeless, Krypton, or Doctor Who on good days.

21- On Mars there is advanced tech where medicine as we know it is obsolete. A little more nanites and lasers a lot less oral pills and rectal anythings.

22- Mars is a dry windy planet without water, in comparison to Earth’s visible habitats.

23- Mars grows things without name at the moment, but it is edible, like all things people make do with.

24- Standard Martian wear is something of a lab coat but resistant to its environmental elements.

25- Anything can be a weapon in untrained hands…

26- #FF upcoming writers

27- Earthlings go to school and are trained for space exploration. Martians learn by doing.

#RomanceNaNoPrep

1- Hi, Nicole here. Library worker by day/night/weekend, writer every other chance. Currently two and a half books into my #RedLetters series. So far all I’ve ever written falls into womens fiction category.

2- For Red Letters? 50K is just going to start it. They end up being easily 80-100K, even if its more like 200K words that have to be split into two different books...

3- Romance is my sub genre, as it reads more like womans fiction first. But the other books in the series cover more of the slice of life/journey stuff. This one would have a heavier romantic tone.

4- I love a good believable romance. Whether it starts off as a one night stand or getting to know each other first, the characters have to be real and well rounded. Funny is a plus but not cartoony or asks me to assume too much.

5- Depends on the mood. If I need a little escape, a sweet romance will do the trick. But if I need to be reminded of what it’s like to be human outside of working too much or need a serious escape, steamy tends to have a better grip on me.

6- #RedLetters started as an RP… don’t know where the 💜 of romance came from, but I’ve been writing about it as long as I can remember. Helps that hubs & I have been together 10+ yrs & we’re good friends first. Learned lots about relationships from that alone.

7- The main characters in #RedLetters has always been Naomi, better known as Tweety and the musician Woods. There is a whole host of other characters that are important, and Greg may become an MC… if he stays Greg of course.

8- Well, it’s not really a special meaning, so much as an inside joke. Tweety got her nickname from an outfit she wore, and a drunk-ish Cockney woman. The rest as they say is history…

9- Honestly? Kind of a fan of Emma Stone. Looks sweet and innocent, but can be sassy and a bit sexy too. All around package, inside and out I think.

10- I might have the Evil Other Woman cliche… At least on the surface. Hoping the history fleshes this out to be a full story not just a mad woman scorned thing...

11- Big fan of sassy heroines (aka no weak and fainty unrealistic women) and maybe a touch of the second chance at love thing…

12- #FF #followfriday  @MaeBaumWriter @klimov_author  have been #prepping with me since day one... plus I like the stuff @K_A_Grayson  does in her rockstar #romance...

13- When they first met, Tweety was about 21/22. Woods was 24/25. When they meet again about 5 years later, Woods is 30, Tweety will have a birthday in that book.

14- The characters are struggling 20's. Woods is higher in class while trying to do it himself. Tweety's poorer & finding herself. Inside the bar/club, social status doesn’t matter, & in some cases, makes you less important the more important you assume you are.

15- Woods sister approves, eventually. Tweety doesn’t talk to her parents, instead relying on Frost the manager to be her father figure. After a good bit of threatening during a chat with Woods, Frost approved too.

16- In this book? Friendly enemies. Tweety is not happy to see him, but she is never a rude sort, more the kill with kindness type. Woods is more eager to charm her into regretting her choices and occasionally bringing up the past, even if facts are distorted...

17- What brings Tweet and Woods together? A certain book… you know when you get that déjà vu feeling? Except you have proof from your side of the tale too. Trouble is that the truth has its own version…

18- What’s keeping them apart? Lots of hurt pride, broken hearts, completely different lifestyles… But even with all that past, the thing that made them unique is still there.

19- Remember yesterday, when I said different lifestyles? Yeah. West coast musician with a wildly successful touring band vs an East coast wildly famous bar/nightclub owner. One is always on the go, the other is happily rooted to one spot. Plus the same problems as last time- other people.

20- Woods can be a bit too thick headed or obtuse for Tweet’s liking. Woods isn’t exactly annoyed by her running off tendency, but it isn’t making his days any better either.

21- Well, this pair have been together before, and neither were all that innocent then. But since then… One has gone full on flavor of the month style, while the other is much more cautious about their reputation.

22- Woods & Tweet = the infamous Ghostbusters “don’t cross the streams” thing. It’s a peppy flirt who makes you question if she’s as naïve as she sounds vs a rogue with all the manners of that bad boy you need to leave with. Their game is holding out the longest & upping the stakes…

23- Their first kiss? Very steamy yet semi polite in front of the crowd… You see, it was Halloween, and there were sexy costumes… someone didn't speak, just acted, and the rest is... in the book!

24- In this series, I love that Tweet and Woods flirt at the level of chess moves sometimes. Tweety makes a man play on her level or the game is over. If you use tired lines or give the answer she expects when giving you enough rope to hang yourself… well she’s already over it.

29- Favorite quality about-

Tweety- She’s amazing at making people feel welcome and free to be themselves.

Woods- He’s got an awesome amount of patience and tolerance. The not being jealous adds to his charms.

30- Least favorite quality about-

Tweety- Always with the bright, happy side even if it hurts…

Woods- He picks up a ghost nickname for a reason you know.

31- This has been fun, and I’m totally ready for #NaNoWriMo! (Sits and waits for the clock to strike 12…)

#CharactersTell

1/10- “Oh, it’s my favorite month! Halloween weekend parties are our best buiness, and the most fun! Of course I have to come chat about #RedLetters with you all. You all know me as miss Tweety...”

2/10- Tweety- “Why i’m your hostess with the most-ess! I run the front of house at Soulful, in addition to being a co-owner.”

3/10- Tweety- “It’s only lonely in the sense of responsibility. Otherwise, I have a ton of staff and regulars around at any given time.”

4/10-Tweety- “I guess? I’m great with a lot of things, but Nira is best with the finances, so I leave that to him. Since I started being a waitress, I had him investing & asked for what I needed to buy clothes with. Best way to pay him back for the couch surfing.”

5/10- Tweety- “My time off is usually when I sleep. Now there is some help so I can leave before I start falling asleep, but other than writing, I wouldn’t know what to do with time off.”

6/10- Tweety- “Adventure happens all around the club. You never know what Bebe will do when bored, at least my job and the respect given to me, keeps the place from falling down around it all.”

7/10- Tweety- “Well, I would hope that my kindness keeps me in high esteem… Why else would we be so packed all the time? I know there are those against me, because I built a following from scratch.”

#CharactersTell

8/10- “I'm Greg, Gus’ grandson and recent college grad with a degree in business.”

9/10- Greg- “I had a few odds jobs, some for the experience more than the money, but yeah I work a lot.”

10/10- Greg- “I'm not nefarious. Just a regular guy with an inheritance that apparently affects others…”

11/10- Greg- “That's what I'm trying to decide! A piece of a prosperous club or a life on my own…”

12/10- Greg- “Trying not to do that with this choice. You know, this isn't really helping me decide, not when you're highlighting the downsides…”

13/10- Greg- “Progressive. Smart, firm when I have to be. Not overly nice, you will know I'm the boss.”

14/10- Greg- “If I decided to take the ownership, it's really like a slow raise. Or I sell it and make a windfall quick…”

#CharactersTell

15/10- Rolls in on those shoes with wheels inside “Duranta at your service, but everyone calls me Runta! Soul’s not so resident clothing designer and somewhat personal shopping friend to Tweet, if you must know.

16/10- Runta- laughs “Of course not! It takes money and patronage to become a designer who makes money. They wanted me to have a different sort of full time boring work.”

17/10- Runta- “I’ve made a few fashion week shows, and have some amazingly supportive fans who basically are fashion influencers in their own rights...” #spoilers

18/10- Runta- “Sure, I mean clothes and fashion is how you see a person, so of course people have stereotypes based on looks, but I don’t play that game.”

19/10- Runta- “Absolutely! Networking is a big part of what I do! Connections get me everywhere.”

20/10- Runta- “Total workaholic! A friend of mine says that if you love what you do, it’s not working, but living. And I am living for this life!”

21/10- Runta- “I learned a few things from the place I got my start. Hire people good at what they do, and that you can stand being around constantly. So yeah, the people who work for me become a family, since we’re together that much.”

[pinupac87]

Novae Webcomic Playlist Rundown (So Far)

Sooo, what started out as a silly tweet to the creators of Novae Webcomic turned into a full fledged playlist. Each update on their twitter I would have *certain song playing in the background* to amuse myself. They liked it, so I kept doing it. Then they gave me the okay to make a playlist. So I went through the comic; page by page to find appropriate songs not only for the characters but for the emotions that a certain song would evoke.

I went to town. 

Currently at the time of writing this, I have not fine tuned this playlist yet. I’m listening to it to ensure the flow of music. But the songs are not in order of the comic; I wanted to have the feel of the comic. Since I am updating this as they update the comic (I don’t have Patreon right now, so I am updating it as the new pages come up on the website and their twitter.) the playlist additions will be ongoing. I am not currently taking suggestions; the playlist is just my impressions of what I see and feel a song might evoke in terms of emotion.

So, let’s get into the rundown!

***

Smooth Operator - Sade

The one that started the whole thing. I joked that Sullivan was smooth in his interactions with Raziol. And he is.

Careless Whisper - George Michael

Same as above, meant as a joke but it fits. Epic saxophone solo for the win.

Moondance - Van Morrison

This is a beautiful song, and the themes of love and night time fits with their relationship. The music progression and Van Morrison’s voice capture the mood I saw reading this comic. This song also prompted the playlist’s creation.

 She Blinded Me With Science - Stanford Mixed Company

How could I not add this song? Raziol’s love of astronomy and science is integral to this story, not to mention his interactions with Sullivan. The a Capella version would be very appropriate for the time (I am aware chamber music was big, but a Capella was still popular). And you can’t deny the nerdy cheesiness. 

I Could Fall In Love - Selena

This is a good song for a quiet slow burn as the two get to know each other. For Sullivan because he might be willing to open himself up to Raziol, and for Raziol because he finds someone that he can have a connection with. Both are nervous, both are probably scared to tell the other at first, but they know that something’s there. 

Crush - Jennifer Paige

Sullivan is reluctant to let himself feel something deep for Raziol, so he tries to deny it. The lyrics are a good refection of that. And the beat is good to dance to.

Englishman in New York - Sting

This is a multi-layered selection. Both are outsiders in their place in the world they are in. Raziol being born from Hindustan (India) and Sullivan being an enigma wrapped in secrets (That’s why his cloak is so big.) make this song a perfect parallel for the two of them.

 Hopeless Wanderer - Mumford and Sons

Very on the nose for Sullivan. His travels around the world and the fact that he doesn’t have an anchor make me wonder what will happen...

After Tonight - Justin Nozuka

Very sweet and appropriate of the two star nerds.

And I Love Him - Benjamin Gibbard

This cover of And I Love Her was re-imagined for a playlist for Pride. It’s quiet, soft, and very affectionate.

 I’ve Got a Crush On You - Frank Sinatra

Same with all the songs that have themes of pining and new attractions on this playlist. 

Come Fly with Me - Frank Sinatra

For the Flight Attendant AU. Because I can. Cue the 60′s style film editing for the opening with planes and map montages. 

Then He Kissed Me - The Crystals

A sort of Meet-Cute song for the two. 

Through the Valley - Shaun James

Sullivan. This man has been through a lot. Whatever trauma he encounted in his travels has let him to feel reluctant. I get the impression that he has seen some things in his travels. 

Sigh No More - Mumford and Sons

Again, Sullivan. It seems that he knows what he wants...

Winter Winds - Mumford and Sons

...but there is something that is holding him back. Perhaps he’s not ready yet?

Stand by Me - Ben E. King

Raziol knows that he has feelings for Sullivan and wants to be close to the mysterious man.

I Found You - Alabama Shakes

Both have been trying to find things in their life and in all of the world, they found each other. Whether or not that will end up as a full fledged romance at the time of writing this remains to be seen.

In Case You Didn’t Know - Boyce Avenue

Raziol’s pining during his interactions with Sullivan the more he sees him.

Mix Tape - The Cast of Avenue Q

Ever wonder what having a crush was like? Well, here ya go.

Yellow - Coldplay

The cosmic feel of this song and the sweet vocals bring the love of astronomy and love in general gives a beautiful feel for this comic.

The First Cut is the Deepest

Both men have had heartbreak in their past. But this is more for Sullivan. See Winter Winds for explanation. 

Love Like You - Eric Hutchinson

The feel of a new attraction that makes things feel bright and fun.

Shine on Me - Eric Hutchinson

Raziol’s feeling for Sullivan as things progress. He feels lighter when Sullivan is around.

Phantom’s Theme (Beauty And The Beast) - Paul Williams

Sullivan, on the other hand, has some serious shadows in his life and his past. And with his profession, he lives there as well.

I Fought in A War - Belle & Sebastian

Following up on Sullivan. This might be speculation here, but he’s been through a lot. Probably seen a lot of death. Perhaps he was a part of a conflict or was a witness to it?

The Book of Love - The Magnetic Fields

There is a gentleness to this version of the song. Love is old, scary, beautiful, and something that can’t be fully understood. Think of this as the dating and falling in love montage song. Sans poolside scene that you see in every indie film.

 Read, Eat, Sleep

Raziol’s thought process and his environment around him. There is something very analytical to this song with sounds of a city and storms. An instrumental and atmospheric feel.

You’re So Cool - Hans Zimmer (True Romance Soundtrack)

Not every song has to have vocals. Sullivan’s view of Raziol. I imagine that this is what plays when he is around Raizol.

Dreaming of You - Selena

You know why. Once the wind chimes play to open the song you are transported.

Kiss the Flame - Jewel

Jupiter - Jewel

These two songs are a good as a romance and sensual evocation of what they are going through. Kiss the Flame is a desire that grips both of them. Jupiter is that casual feeling that you have with your partner by your side.

Somebody’s Watching Me - Rockwell

Not all songs are about the romance! Can’t forget the world they are in. With rumors of wild dogs attacking people, people feeling watched, and bodies showing up folks can’t help but feel paranoid. Feel free to belt out.

Rhiannon - Fleetwood Mac

Sullivan is like the wind, a force of nature that comes in and is beautiful and bittersweet. The fact he is often in the darkness and is the darkness matches well with this song. 

The Creation of Men - Douglas Sills and the Cast of The Scarlet Pimpernel

This was too much fun not to put here. It’s period appropriate (The play takes place exactly 100 years later, but same century) and fun as hell! P.S. Go read The Scarlet Pimpernel and listen to the Broadway cast recording. Do it. 

Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová

I was really debating whether or not to put this on this playlist. It’s been done to death and is on almost every playlist with romance. But dammit, it works. Raziol and Sullivan are a very slow burn. There is no grand romantic scores or fly by night romances here. They are on a path that will take time. It’ll grow, but slowly.

***

That’s the playlist so far, but I’ll update this as I go along. Thanks for reading! And a big thanks to the creators of this comic for allowing me to create this!

And be sure to go read Novae! 

http://www.novaecomic.com/comic/novae-test/

[words-writ-in-starlight]

hey do you want to sell the arthur movie to someone who loved bbc merlin, couldn't stand it after a while, and refused to watch the ending bc the death of camelot always angers me (and makes me cry a bit, usually, if I'm being totally honest, but mostly I get really annoyed) and I avoid it whenever I can?

Well first off, if you got far enough for watching the ending to even be an issue, you lasted longer than me, because...like, listen.  There’s only so far you can push Plot-Mandated Idiocy before I lose my patience with it and I burned out at the end of Season 3 (partway into Season 4?) with Merlin and its Plot-Mandated Idiocy on the part of Arthur and every other living human in Camelot.  I have Some Complaints about that show but the whole magic thing is first on the list.

BUT ANYWAY.

Legend of the Sword is amazing!  It is wonderful!  It is about the rise of Arthur to the throne and therefore does not actually deal with the fall of Camelot at all!

Here are some things that I think are major selling points!

The Premise

So, traditionally, Arthur is smuggled off to be raised as a nobleman’s foster son after the usurpation of Uther’s throne.  In LOTS, it presumes that Uther’s throne is usurped by his brother Vortigern (PSA: Mordred shows up in a wildly nontraditional fashion but like it really worked for me? especially since I hated Mordred in Merlin?), but Arthur’s escape with Ygraine is botched.  Uther and Ygraine are both killed trying to save their son, and Arthur is sent downriver alone as a very young child.  He winds up in Londinium, where he’s saved and raised by a group of prostitutes.  This means that instead of being raised as a foster son of a noble, Arthur grows up mostly on the streets, where he learns to fight and protect His People from Vortigern’s corrupt regime.  A lot of the plot is driven by Arthur’s need to help the women who helped him when he was younger, and that’s ultimately what pushes him out of Just Trying To Get On With It into picking up Excalibur and taking up arms against the usurper king.

Not gonna lie, I was dubious at first?  But like, FUCK, the plot works out phenomenally well, it's creative and gripping and in tune with itself, and all the characters are smart as a whip--which, after the Plot-Mandated Idiocy thing I talked about above, was an incredible relief.  The word ‘chivalry’ is never dropped, but the narrative is driven by this dictate that the strong use their power to defend and help and support or die trying, and that’s my shit.  This movie is King Arthur by way of Robin Hood, which is everything my deepest id could ever have craved.

The Soundtrack

Listen, LOTS is by Guy Ritchie (he of Man From UNCLE and the RDJ Sherlock Holmes movies) so I can tell you a couple things.  First of all, the man knows his way around a goddamn montage, there’s a montage of Arthur growing up and I might actually need a separate post to talk about how magnificently efficient it is--about three minutes of montage gives you all the major points about how Arthur gains all his moral stances and combat/leadership abilities.

More to the point, though, the soundtrack is the most goddamn amazing shit I’ve listened to since maybe Fury Road?  Like, the Wonder Woman theme is magic, of course, but I love the soundtrack of LOTS so much I’m actually just listening to it on loop right now.  It’s all drums and bells and strings and heavy driving beats with just enough of an electronic thread to sound like folk music from a world very much not our own.  This music makes me want to go on a fucking quest, catch me stealing a horse and looking for a fucking dragon to slay.  Here is the main theme, if it doesn’t inspire the desire to go on a heroic quest I just can’t help you.

Arthur’s Character

Right, so, like...here is a controversial statement for you.  I am exhausted by the Hot Edgy Take of Arthur being a jackass.  I’m just.  I’m tired of it.  It hasn’t been Interesting And New for like minimum a thousand years.  I stuck it out in Merlin because...like...I guess I thought Arthur was going to improve?  And he does!  Like, he becomes a reasonably competent king!  But part of the thing that broke me on that show was that he wasn’t exactly Golden Age Of Camelot levels of generous/compassionate/wise.  Largely because of that Plot-Mandated Idiocy thing.  But he’s still kind of an arrogant, self-centered, spoiled asshole.

And I’m fucking sick of that take.

You know what I like?  Arthur who's confident in his abilities because he knows himself and his skills inside-out.  Arthur who has a sense of humor that hides a knife-edge of intelligence.  Arthur who knows that however good he is, the world is a big place and he needs to always strive to be better.  Arthur who would rather die than see someone who trusts him hurt, and who makes that clear.  Arthur who can go from fighting a war to saving a scared kid in a heartbeat.  Arthur who believes in quick and efficient reparations for a wrong done to someone under his care, but who isn’t too hotheaded to make an ally when he has the chance.

I like King Arthur to be clever and kind and ruthless and honorable and good, like, if your Arthur isn’t through and through a good man who knows that the people begging for coins are just as worthy of protection and good treatment as a king in his castle, I don’t want to hear about it.

And my guys.  LOTS delivers.

The Magic

Let me put it to you this way.  That $175mil budget for this movie?  It wasn’t exactly going into hot wings at the local KFC.  The magic is beautiful, and elaborate, and an excellent part of the world.  Nothing is really explained in depth, it’s just “Okay, here’s what’s happening, check the kaiju-sized war elephants and if you’re okay with that you’ll be fine so buckle up.”  And like...hell yeah I’m okay with kaiju-sized war elephants, sign me the fuck up.  I’m a big believer that either you have to explain everything or you have to just call it a flux capacitor and pretend that those words go together in the English language and hope that your audience catches up.  LOTS does a great job with their flux capacitor.  The Mage never explains what she’s doing or talks about how things work, she just sets up shop with some herbs and an asp and a really excellent cloak and starts getting shit done.

Excalibur is also really fantastic (like, listen, your magic sword should do some magic shit when wielded by its destined master) and they deal with something I’ve never actually seen before, which is the idea that it’s not the stone that’s enchanted but rather Excalibur itself.  So you could theoretically stick Excalibur into a reasonably large tree stump and the stump would petrify and only a Pendragon would be able to draw it.  And it’s cool as shit.  I was so disappointed with how little Excalibur appeared in Merlin (Plot-Mandated Idiocy strikes again I guess), so having a version of the Arthur story where the sword is fucking awesome made me very happy.

(Addendum: listen.  LISTEN.  I recognize that the council has made a decision about the Mage being Guinevere but the Mage is obviously Merlin.  Like.  Obviously.  She helped Uther woo Ygraine and forged Excalibur and knew the Lady of the Lake of old and now she has a king who’s not a king, a king who grew up in a brothel, and she’s exhausted by everything Arthur chooses to be, but...he’ll do.)

The Vibe

King Arthur should feel like King Arthur.  It should feel vaguely otherworldly.  It should boil over with magic.  It should have knights errant and loyal companions and clever courtiers.  It should have terrible wickedness and stubborn light and people who die for both.  It should have an Arthur whose knights love him, and who loves his people, and who never makes enemies when he can make friends.

And Legend of the Sword feels like King Arthur.

[damedarcy]

Tune in every Thursday folks, for the next excerpt of Hi Jax & Hi Jinx! A costume drama DD Autobiography to be published by Feral House fall 2018 thanks @AdamParfrey @DameDarcy ___________________________ MOVIES Act 1 Just a little back story of my experiences contacting the directors I loved, (or on second thought, was this a gentle form of stalking them?) Costume dramas? Hell yes to a delicious brocade delight. Then next in order of love, surrealist and I guess horror then art movies. Like Eraserhead, The Forbidden Zone by Richard Elfman, Superstar by Todd Haynes, and Careful by Guy Madden were all huge influences on me while I was in Art school as a film major, and after. I had the good fortune to meet all of these directors. I love Matthew Barney’s movies, particulary the Cremaster Cycle, and met him Once Upon a Time at his art studio in the Meat Packing District He revealed to me he is also from Idaho and was a fashion model, and afterwards we partied. I like silent films. Pandora’s Box, Cabinet Of Dr. Caligari, and Metropolis being good examples. Barry Lyndon by Kubrick and anything by Kubrick. Anything by Werner Herzog, anything by Wes Anderson, but particularly of course The Life Aquatic. I know I will meet Wes one day. Anything by Terry Gilliam, Brazil being the best. Michel Gondry does good contempory work, Spike Jonze has right on social commentary. The movies, Spider Baby, and Daisies are like my life with Lisa “Suckdog” Carver. And Skidoo is the best role Carol Channing ever played, and wins for best cast, having Groucho Marx as God, Donyale Luna, Mickey Roonie, Frankie Avalon, Slim Pickins , Jackie Gleason and many more. I love those really Da Da Betty Boop cartoons from the 20's that cab Callaway sings on, the 30's being the 20's dark and sad twin. The best time in the world was 1927. Marie Antoinette movie by Girly Copula looks great but is less filling on plotline. Isabelle Doll loves it though. She doesn't care about stuff like intellectual content, she's just a Rococo fetishist. Another movie Isabelle loves is Interview With A Vampire, which she thinks is a romantic comedy. Isabelle is also never going to die and sleeps in a little pink coffin too, so finally she saw something in her reality portrayed in a movie, plus pushing all the other dolls around. She thinks it’s funny that the little girl Dunst character uses a pile of dolls as a fridge in which to keep her dead nanny for a snack. Five Stars in doll land: Whatever happened to Baby Jane. And Night Of The Hunter, where Lillian Gish plays an old Christian lady battling a demented preacher with a shotgun while she sings a hymn in Harmony with him. I now realize this is an analogy to life in the South. Isabelle thinks the dolls are the stars of these movies, that’s why she loves them, and the sad little song the little girl, Pearl, sings in the boat. Isabelle also loves Death Becomes Her because the ladies in that movie become dolls. Also, because Isabelle Doll is a flapper from the 20’s she likes the Isabella Rossellini character playing the hottest 20's flapper that lives eternally and has hundreds of hot male sex slaves. Wow! Back to what I like: Beauty and The Beast, by Jean Cocteau. It has a scene where Beauty glides ethereally down the corridor, the wall sconces made of men’s arms holding candles move to light her way. So sexy, and Sooooo good! Brother Sun Sister Moon about St. Francis Assi, and speaking of churchy stuff... The Devils By Ken Russell 1971 An account of the apparent demoniacal possession of the 17th-century nuns of Louden, climaxing in the burning of their priest as a sorcerer. There is the cutest cabaret scene in it where a gorgeous boy plays the Venus Di Milo. More movie hits, picked because they are dreamlike twisted fairytale moving paintings: The Fall, Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind, Come Along Do, Breathless, Holy Motors, The Holy Mountain, Citizen Kane, The Maltese Fountain, anything by the Coen Brothers, and anything by the Brothers Quay. Surreal plotlines of Being John Malkovitch, Last Year at Marionbad, Mulholand Drive, The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, A Ghost Story, It Follows, Rubber, Funky Forrest, and Back To The Future. The crazy jewel tones and harsh lighting contrasts of Hammer Horror Movies, and The Cook The Theif His Wife and Her Lover. The stunning visuals and general atmosphere of A Pigeon Sat on A Branch Reflecting on Existence, Russian Ark, The City Of Lost Children, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, and Enter The Void. The social commentary of Where The Green Ants Dream, Bubble,The Bicycle Thief, There Will Be Blood, and The Dark Backward plus all animations by Steve Cutts, who I truly love with a passion (like I wanna marry him, sight unseen, or maybe my brain just wants to marry his brain). The campy and poignient portrayals of artists about art, in Pink Flamingos, Big Eyes, Loving Vincent, Blow Up, Black Swan, The Mirror, The Dving Bell and The Butterfly, Waking Life, The Five Obstructions, My Best Fiend and Minute Movies by The Residents. The Nautical themed and true examples of what it’s like to dream and astral project to another world of Master and Commander, Cloud Atlas and Time Bandits. And the way Sunset Boulevard, Gummo, and Slumdog Millionaire show a reality specific to the portrayer. And of course all the stuff I saw in Larry Jordan’s animation class and dollar Matanee at The Red Vic on Haight Street while in art school in San Francisco. Still classic favorites : A Colour Box, La Jetee, Un Chein Andalou, Meshes Of The Afternoon, Anemic Cinema, Ballet Mechanique, Man With The Movie Camera, Flicker, Blue, Back and Forth, The Life and Death of a Hollywood Extra, Surface Tension, Chelsa Girl, and Dog Star Man about a man trying to climb a mountain with his dog in this scratch emulsion found footage mess madness that is one of the most deeply original movies of all time.

[jennaschererwrites]

Dirty Dancing: 10 Most WTF Moments from ABC's TV Remake - Rolling Stone

The original 1987 Dirty Dancing is a movie that worked against all odds. Eighties sensibility (and hairstyles and theme song) shoehorned into a Sixties nostalgia piece, a miniscule budget, a cast of unknowns, and a troubled production – not to mention a heroine named … Baby. And yet it positively crackled, thanks to Eleanor Bergstein's deeply personal script, crazy chemistry between leads Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze, and the ethereal gyrations of the late, great Swayze.

Wayne Blair and Jessica Sharzer's remake attempts to be all things to all people, and ends up being nothing to anybody. The 2017 made-for-TV Dirty Dancing manages to be both a grim, workmanlike re-creation of the original – some scenes are rehashed shot for shot – and also a vast extrapolation that bloats the original's runtime by more than an hour. It's also a musical (but only sorta), a melodrama about the decay of marriages, and a clumsy (if well-meaning) treatise on issues ranging from feminism to institutionalized racism.

Buried among all this is the original story: about Frances "Baby" Houseman (a wildly miscast Abigail Breslin), a teen who goes on vacation with her family to a 1960s Borscht Belt resort and experiences a psychosexual awakening while also learning the Mambo. But those unfamiliar with the original material would be forgiven for not following that thread, given how many other ones Sharzer's rambling screenplay has attempted to weave in. Here are just a few of the moments that had us shouting "No!" at our TV screens while clutching our VHS copy of the original to our hearts.

1. The Framing Story Confusingly enough, the Catskills-set tale begins with a helicopter shot of…the Manhattan skyline? It's 1975 for some reason, and a bunch of hastily costumed extras are standing outside a Broadway theater that's showing a sold-out production of something called Dirty Dancing: The Musical. And if that wasn't "What the huh?" enough for you, Baby herself grabs an orchestra seat to watch, voiceover-ing to herself: "You never forget your first love. You carry it with you always." And if she'd added …like a watermelon we could almost forgive this nonsense. But she does not, and it's flashback time. Kellerman's! 1963!

2. The Dirty Dancing Isn't Dirty The moment when the original Dirty Dancing blows wide open is when buttoned-up Baby finds herself inside a packed, sweaty staff party where Kellerman's working classers are grinding against each other with impunity. In the remake, she encounters a largely empty room in which clean-cut choristers perform obviously choreographed dance moves with all the sexual charge of a church social. This is also our big intro to Johnny Castle, the bad-boy dance instructor who'll steal Baby's heart, played with put-upon exhaustion by Colt Prattes. This scene made us wonder if Kellerman's had fallen prey to some kind of Westworld scenario in which chiseled robots dutifully performed the motions of carefree pleasure without actually experiencing it. Has anybody checked for a mysterious maze behind the dance studio?

3. It's a Musical…Kinda? Blair and Sharzer seemed to have half-decided to make Dirty Dancing a musical without fully committing. The remake features most of the Sixties and Eighties tunes from the original soundtrack, but made some of them sung by the actors and others played as incidental music. Case in point: Johnny sings the Contours' "Do You Love Me" while gyrating at the party, but later dances mutely to a cover of Eric Carmen's "Hungry Eyes" playing over the action. Make up your mind, movie! The sung-through parts add nothing to the movie, other than proving that ABC can do a "musical event" just like Fox and NBC can.

4. Too Many Subplots Did we really need to know how Baby's sister, Lisa, got the ukulele she plays in the talent show? Or how Baby got her iconic white dress? So very clearly not. The remake provides no shortage of side stories, most notably the tale of Mrs. Houseman (Debra Messing) and her frustration with her distant husband (Bruce Greenwood). We're glad your working through some stuff, Marjorie, but it's a tangent that's given so much screen time that it threatens to engulf the main plot.

5. So Much for That Lift Oscar nominee Abigail Breslin has many virtues as an actor, but dancing ability is not one. A good chunk of Dirty Dancing is a Baby-gets-better-at-Mambo montage, and in the original it's fun to watch her go from awkward to smooth. In this one, she never improves – but everyone acts like she does. It hurts our hearts to watch Breslin and Prattes practice the most uncomfortable, splay-legged lifts in the history of dance in a pristine pond, pretending that anything graceful at all is happening. If nothing else, at least we get to stare at Johnny's abs, which are pretty much the only well-formed thing in this entire movie.

6. So Much for That Sex Scene Grey and Swayze famously hated working together, but their onscreen sparks were visible from space. The same can certainly not be said for Breslin and Prattes, who both look vaguely put out anytime they have to so much as smooch. The ook factor reaches its zenith in the iconic "Cry to Me" sex scene, which is cringingly restaged – from swirling dip to bare-chest caress – in a way that only emphasizes how little the actors seem to be comfortable making physical contact. We do indeed feel like cryin'.

7. Too Many Issues With its sex positivity, strong-willed heroine and frank discussion of abortion, Bergstein's original movie was a surprisingly feminist piece of cinema for its day. The remake attempts to bring that subtext to the fore, but in doing so undermines its own message. Baby 2.0 is reading The Feminine Mystique and dreaming of becoming a surgeon like her dad, sure; but Sharzer's script also takes icky glee in slut-shaming an older female character (Katey Sagal) and is generally more prudish than the source material. The remake also attempts to touch on racism and sexual assault, but does both so glancingly that it feels cheap.

8. The Autotuned Covers That this Dirty Dancing is tonally all over the map is no more obvious than in the millennialed-up versions of songs from the original soundtrack. We kinda feel like we're at the Kellerman's of old with straight-up covers like Lady Antebellum's "Hey Baby" and Seal's "Cry to Me." But watching Baby learn to dance to Greyson Chance's goopy electronic take on "Hungry Eyes," or seeing Johnny drive away to Calum Scott's over-produced "She's Like the Wind" (originally sung on the soundtrack by Swayze himself) take us right out of the story. We get that ABC wanted to chart on iTunes, but come on. No one's heart is bursting or breaking to this much autotuning.

9. We Are Not Having the Time of Our Lives And it has come to this: the Kellerman's talent show. Baby is sitting in her corner (reading The Bell Jar! Take it down a notch, Baby), missing Johnny. But does he coolly enter in the middle of a song like Swayze does? Oh no, my friends. "This is a summer I'll always remember," Mr. Kellerman declares from the stage. "A summer of family. A summer of friendship. A summer…" "…of LOVE!" Johnny declares, bursting into the room. Dude. For one thing, the Summer of Love isn't happening for another four years. In this version, "I've Had the Time of My Life" becomes a full-cast musical number, which Johnny prefaces by declaring, in case you were confused, "I had the time of my life with you this summer." And to our dismay, Baby still hasn't nailed that lift.

10. What the Hell Was That Ending? Just as we're all dozing off because this thing has already been on for almost three hours, we're back with future Baby in 1975, in the audience of that Broadway play that is confusingly also her life. Baby hangs around the theater afterwards to meet up with…Johnny! Who choreographed a musical, based on a book that Baby wrote about that one crazy summer at Kellerman's! (So much for her becoming a surgeon, we guess?) Into this awkwardness enters Baby's husband, who is not Johnny, and their child, and Johnny looks wistful, or maybe just confused as to how Dirty Dancing has managed to defy space-time and rip off La La Land. It's an unnecessary, annoying coda to an unnecessary, annoying movie. And just when you think it's over, Johnny says, "Hey. Keep on dancing." We would prefer not to.

[nora-reads-homestuck]

Nora Listens to HS: Homestuck for the Holidays

Hello everybody! You’ll have to forgive my reprehensible lateness on this one; I had a HELL of a New Year, and things are only really just starting to settle down. But, technically, until Epiphany tomorrow, we’re still within the historical bounds of Christmas, so at least I have a (partial) excuse.

I’m here today with an extracurricular on the recommendation of my ask screener @SkaiaMechanic, who pointed me to this “unofficial official” album arranged on the side by the otherwise-legit Homestuck musicians, just for funsies. I’m actually really excited! I know that most of the time they’re probably composing exactly what they want to compose anyway, and Andrew Hussie just uses what he likes, but this is even more free rein, if that makes any sense. Granted they’re working toward a unified theme (and you know how I usually feel about theme albums), but the holidays are a pretty broad topic. So let’s see what they’ve got! ^0^

Quick aside: oh my god, that album cover. It’s super cute and well done, but I am losing my shit at Rose’s outfit. Ok, on to the actual music!

Time for a Story: Listen my children and you shall hear / of the midnight ride of Paul Revere Ahaha ok, let me actually hit play on this. ...Oh. Oh, god. Who is this?? OH MY FUCKING GOD, THE NON-CANONICAL CHRISTMAS APOCRYPHA, AHAHAHAHA. OH MY GOD. The ex-Catholic in me is HOWLING.

A Skaian Christmas: And that faded right into the first song, which has all the Christmas trappings, like sleigh bells, and horns, and... Oh, haha, it’s this theme! I kind of dig it! The additions actually go really well, festive but unobtrusive for the most part. 1:28: Oh heck yeah, that choir is rad! Short and sweet. I’m enjoying this so far.

Anthem of Rime: Aaand we’ve faded into what’s starting off as Carol of the Bells. Are we going to fade into another familiar theme? That’s what I’m predicting and hoping. Ding... dong... ding... dong... I sang this song in a Christmas choir once, and actually knowing all the words makes me some kind of weirdo, apparently? Oh hey! Yeeeahh! We’ve got... what’s the name of this one? *looks back* Terraform! Looking back on my initial review of this song, I think I’ve warmed up to it a bit. (Because the song title has ‘rime’ in it?? GET IT??? :D) Or maybe it’s just that it sounds more badass when it’s all Christmassy? Not sure. Heh, this chopped and screwed ending is fun.

Pachelbel’s Gardener: Basically if you’ve been on the internet any amount of time and you haven’t come across this video before, then... Well, I don’t even know what. Anyway! Hah. Yep, there’s those chords, and those eight notes. Whoa, that’s a weird synth. And this beat! I’m getting, weirdly, Taco? 1:25: Aha, there’s Gardener for realsies. I’m not sure if it actually really fits with the Canon in D bassline, especially considering the melody phrase is 4 measures to Canon’s 8, but it’s close enough. I’m not sure if I actually like it, but it sure is interesting. My feelings on the original were pretty tepid too, IIRC.

Carefree Perigee: D’aww. This one’s short, but I loved the Carefree Victory melody a lot, so it’s nice to hear it again. I like the reimagining of the chord progression. So syruppy and sweet. <3

The More You Know: Oh lawd.

The Squiddles Save Christmas: Woo, Squiddles! The Squiddles album has been getting a lot of play on my iPod lately. Unironically, even. Huh, this is another neat reimaginning of an existing progression! Oh... ok... these vocals are a tad bit creepy. Sounds like the singers might have had a biiiit too much eggnog before recording, haha. 1:17: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHSAJKHD. ...Nog baby????? Wtf???? Like a ‘food baby’?? WOW THIS TOTALLY WENT OFF THE RAILS WOW.

Billy the Bellsuit Diver Has Something to Say: It’s beginning to look a lot like Squiddles... Hmm, this one’s more fun so far, but I just know it’s going to get weird in a second. Isn’t it. ISN’T IT?? 0:47: Ok, yeah, here we go. 1:55: OH GOD. Unpleasant ASMR back twitches, oh no. Wow, turned down to like, 3 kbps or whatever, it starts sounding like whale song. ...Huh, the ending is actually sort of nice. Overall I don’t think I enjoyed it much, though. :(

Squiddly Night: Oh wow, I looked away from the window and didn’t realize that it had actually become a new song. AHHHHHH NO THAT ENDING WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING.

The Santa Claus Interdimensional Travel Sleigh: Wait, so they do believe in Santa, but Jesus Jegus is non-canonical? EVEN BETTER.

Land of Light and Cheer: Noel, noel, etc., etc. Are we going to bring in LoLaR’s theme here? Whoa, yep! And it’s actually really nice? I like the instrumentation in this one. That flute is gorgeous! This is a Ferkol piece, so it might very well be live.

Gog Rest Ye Merry Prospitians: Let nothing you dismay! And... somebody chugging eggnog? More like, NOG REST YE, AMIRITE? Oh whoa! Suddenly Sburb. Cool, though. Is this another Ferkol piece? The sudden loudness changes smack of his style. Hah, yep, I’m getting good at this. It helps that he’s working with established pieces that have very definite melodies; keeps the meandering to a minimum.

Carolmanthetime: Oh whoa. This is neat! Pretty heavy for a Jit piece, but I like it. And that’s hints of Showtime and Walk-Stab-Walk, if I’m not mistaken. Jit’s compositions often use somewhat cheesier-sounding instrumentation, but they’re always pretty solidly put together, and of course his piano talent is damn amazing.

Candlelight: Hah, Candles and Clockwork. To be honest, I’ve always felt like this melody had a lot of potential that’s never really been realized so far. So far this arrangement is pretty pleasant. I’d love to hear it performed by live instruments sometime. ...Wait, this one says ‘lyrics’ next to it. Eh? Oh. Oh. Welp, scratch that off, then.

Oh No! It’s the Midnight Crew!: ...Exactly what it says on the tin. Oh wait, shit, they have an actual cameo?? Ahaha.

Let It Snow: Hah, this is fun! Kind of like an off-brand Vince Guaraldi Trio. Very ‘mall food court’ vibe, especially with all the reverb. It almost makes it creepy without the accompanying voices and laughter. An abandoned mall food court at 3 in the morning? (See what I did there??)

Hella Sweet: ...Mighty big sack indeed.

Shit Let’s Be Santa: OH SHIT, this one has lyrics too. On the plus side I’m not really expecting any kind of quality, so what I hear can only be an improvement. ...Huh, this has a lo-fi early 90′s synthpop feel to it. I actually... like it?? The lyrics rhyme, too. I almost wouldn’t expect that of a SBaHJ-themed song.

Choo Choo: George the Conductor of what? ......1:12: AHAHAHAHA.

Overall thoughts:

Well, it’s a bit less than I was really hoping for, given that a good number of the tracks are just bizarre rambling (but still with extra points for the Apocrypha thing), but I don’t know that there was anything on the album that I heard and thought ‘wow that’s terrible’. I’m a fan of Christmas music, generally speaking, anyway, so I’m not sure if it would be everybody’s cup of tea, especially if you celebrate different holidays. But hey, it’s free content, and there’s certainly a few things worth listening to if only to hear some interesting rearrangements of your favorite tunes.

Top five six tracks in order or favoritude:

Carefree Perigee

Land of Light and Cheer

Carolmanthetime

A Skaian Christmas

Anthem of Rime

Shit Let’s Be Santa

Album Rating: 6/10. Drink some eggnog first for a funner experience!

[uterusclub]

Party planning had been premeditated a few weeks prior which, per usual, escalated from one idea to a wonderful thread of several, awesome ones! This was going to be a hit out of the park! We initiated our weekend with a scheduled meeting at The Hyatt Regency at McCormick Center courtesy of a free night-stay voucher bestowed upon us by the always generous, Wika Shorty G. As I was already pre-committed to subbing at Cheetah gym beforehand, Sharon took her leisure getting ready at home whilst I donkey-trekked my overstuffed backpack to the likes of Andersonville for some cardio pre-party. Post class, I jumped aboard my Uber with a very friend Indian driver who immediately launched into his life story and offered me some Bollywood-esk tunes for my journey. Shit was good. Shazammed a bunch of it. But this ride was LONG. That’s what you get for rush-hour Fridays though, I suppose. In any case, either HE grew tired of the Bollywood or thought I had as he eventually changed the musical accompaniment to his favorite American tunes which involved some car-karaoked Backstreet Boys. My route concluded with Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On at which point, we neared the Hyatt Regency which was chaos-packed with vehicles as well as tuxedo’d gentlemen and fancy-dressed ladies. What in the fuck? I was well aware the Chicago Auto Show was happening (by no means of my own) but what did fanciness have to do with that? We came to later learn of the First Look for Charity which costs a whopping $300 per ticket. So basically, rich people is the answer. And we are not as such. In fact, I was, dare I say looking quite derelict post-workout class by the time I arrived at this very classy joint. Which, might I also add, is confusing as all living hell. I had to actually call Sharon and summon her to appear in order to figure out just where the hell to go. So she met me in some lobby portion looking equally derelict-y and we made our way back to our hotel room where we noshed on pre-ordered Indiana food while watching a re-run episode of Ghost Adventures.

Indian in belly, we did our utmost to glamor up before grabbing an Uber and making our way to the Museum of Science and Industry! Mission: Silent Disco! So I’d heard of this concept for quite some time and thought it very intriguing. Wasn’t exactly sure what to expect but I was NOT disappointed. Upon descending an accouplement of stairs, grabbing our drink tickets and dropping off our coats, we ascended to an exhibit hall lightly sprinkled with people. Handed our headphones, we observed three DJS set up in opposition and liquor tables arranged in the center. We took a few moments to scour the scene and get a little ‘groove’ on before turning in our ticket for some liquid courage. It was, of course, at this point, we realized we couldn’t leave the area with drink in hand so we chugged as quickly as we could to peruse the open exhibits around us. Exploring the museum was much more enjoyable jetting back and forth between house music and a bunch of random 70’s tunes. I could do this forever. I could live here under these ground rules. In any case, in hour into our endeavor, we were over it (as we are oft to do) and scheduled an Uber.

Back at the hotel, we de-make-up-ified (although my hair glitter refused to completely vacate the premises), changed into PJ’s and partook in the absolute splendor that is Forensic Files. It was not until the next morning that we came to realize the magnanimous-ness that is the Hyatt’s most wondrous beds! Holy awesome sleep! I’m fairly sure I didn’t move from my original sleeping position which is quite unheard of. Well rested, we woke up entirely too early (as per usual) and made some in-room coffee. Following that and upon packing up our gear, we headed out to catch Uber.

Congress Hotel, here we come! Upon arriving at the hotel, MAN, this place was GORGEOUS! Not to mention, TIMELY! The old school decor and feel brought me back to my last viewing of The Shining. Creep? Perhaps. But mostly gorgeous and almost homey (gotta be that ‘old soul’ thing). We stayed just long enough to meet the bell-hop to drop off our bags before heading out immediately to catch the 29 bus towards Navy Pier. Time for Cider Fest!! One uneventful bus ride later, we were at the very over-rated Navy Pier. As much as we despise this place, we always end up back here. Go figure. Per usual, their ‘events’ are always held at the exhibit halls at the farthest end of the strip. So basically, it’s a hike. Fortunately, the way there is ALWAYS much easier than the inebriated way back.

Once we reached the exhibit hall, we were at a stand-still for a short period of time. The line looked a lot longer than it was, in actuality. In fact, we ended up entering the exhibit much earlier than anticipated. After grabbing our sample ‘glasses’ and tickets, we met with some awesome friends of ours and made our way upstairs to the less congested area and began our ventures. Let me just say now, it is SO easy getting crunk here and it’s absolutely the best! I couldn’t love cider people more if you paid me. Okay, perhaps I could. But seriously, everyone was so delightful and polite. We had some absolutely OUTSTANDING ciders and of course, some that made you wanna die a little (I blame myself for my lure to the higher percentages). All in all though, no real complaints. An hour and a halfish later, Sharon and I were STARVING. We headed out, quite impressively now that I look back at it and actually WALKED all the way to our next scheduled stop-off, The Public House. Mission: Alcohol milkshake.

So back-story on this. This place concocts themed alcoholic milkshakes every month and they always look super adorable but generally taste like absolute garbage. I think we mostly go there for picture taking purposes. In any case, last time we came here the themed milkshake was ‘sold out’ and it completely broke out hearts. So like complete over-planning nerds, we made sure to call ahead and not waste our goddamn, drunken time. Fortunately, all was well and we got to dabble in their Valentine’s Day themed Rose milkshake which was actually pretty decent tasting (not so much the cake portion or the accompanying cookies but the actual shake was dece). Capping that off, we grabbed another Uber to bring us back to the Congress in order to change and get ready for the ‘evening’s’ fancy, birthday dinner. Side note: during the process of getting our bags from the bell-hop, Jose, we mentioned our ghost-hunting ambitions and after relaying we were staying in room 612, were advised that room 610 had had numerous complaints of arguing being heard in the room at night. I think we were both leery on believing this guy but we were still both hopeful. In fact, I theorized he might possibly be a ghost himself! Especially when we later came to discover there WAS no room 610! After later accusing Jose in the elevator about it, he very nonchalantly replied, ‘Oh, well, it could have been room 612.’ Hmmmmm . . . .

Putting on make-up for the 2nd day in a roll was rough for the both of us but somehow we managed. Heading out, we caught another Uber to take us to the Tortoise Supper Club which, ironically, happened to be literally across the street from The Public House (go figure). While waiting to be seated, we met with some friends and were seated immediately. Good conversation and food was had with of course, more booze. We ended up catching a ride back to our hotel and immediately stripped down and back into PJ’s for the remaining night’s activity: ghost hunting!

Keep in mind, we’re not new to this ghost investigating in our PJ’s thing. Been there, done that – we have no shame. In fact, we actually headed downstairs to the lobby to grab a drink to kick-start our adventure. There, we met bartender, Kevin, whom I immediately questioned, with drink in hand, about his experiences at the hotel. He explained how he’d observed a glass combust out of nowhere and referred us to a woman named, Michelle, who could take us around the hotel. Eventually, he disappeared for a bit and Michelle appeared to be our ‘tour guide.’ She was an absolute blast! Funny, no-holds-bar, type attitude. She ended up taking us to the Gold Room banquet hall where a Peg Leg man was theorized to appear. We mentioned wanting to hit the south tower as I had previously researched it was allegedly the most ‘active’ area to investigate. We headed up to the 12th floor at which time Michelle continue to give us back-story on some of the apparitions believed to be haunting the hotel. She even mentioned how someone had fallen over the stair railing back on NYE and had plummet to the 9th but still managed to survive (though all sorts of fucked up as a result, naturally). At one point, I brought up room 441 which, I had read, was supposedly the most haunted room with a female apparition that would kick the bed while people slept. Michelle was familiar with this story and admitted she hadn’t even been on that floor. She also advised that the entire south tower was technically ‘closed’ since business was slow. As such, we were roaming dark hallways in silence and it was absolutely GLORIOUS! After reaching room 441, we hung out for a bit. Sharon and I used our recording device to do a session. While asking questions and awaiting replies, Michelle would hilarious butt in with whispered responses and at one point, ‘boo’ed the crap out of us! She laughed, we laughed but we were also partially annoyed. It was at this point we realized, nothing was seriously going to get done with her. So we headed back downstairs to the bar and grabbed us a few Moscato’s which Michelle gave us on the house (I think she seriously felt bad about scaring us). Ironically, as we sat and drank, a plethora of people were abound now in the bar. A young man to our right sparked some conversation and we ended up finding out he was on a stop-off for a ghost-tour. Sweet! After speaking with him very briefly, I attempted to ‘overhear’ information from the tour guide but between the bar noise and my own inebriation, it was pretty pointless so I gave us pretty much immediately.

Upon the additional intoxication, we made our way back up to the south tower and the 12th floor and made our way down, ghost hunting gear in hand. We, of course, stopped off at room 441 once again and loitered for quite some time but to our grave disappointment, experienced no phenomenon. To much chagrin, we took our down-trodden selves back to our hotel room at which point, I looked over my photos from the night’s activities for potential orbs and Sharon played back our audio until we were basically fell asleep. We conked out fairly quickly that night with much discomfort (those beds are god awful) and again, headed out relatively early in the morning to trek to the blue line and to the much beloved and abhorred, monkey (Bear) at home.

Sunday was a mixed day of catching up on terribly awesome tv shows and Sharon ‘wasting’ (in my opinion) her birthday cooking short-ribs for dinner (seriously, who cooks on their own birthday?)! Presents were opened and much contentment to the joy of being back at home were indulged. The evening was concluded with the inevitable dread of the incoming Monday which we could only DREAM of ghosting.

Boo-gy and Boo-ze Birthday Party planning had been premeditated a few weeks prior which, per usual, escalated from one idea to a wonderful thread of several, awesome ones!

[djzena]

Alice Cooper's Prime 10 Halloween Songs To Die For Video

Every Halloween, darkish, vacation-themed background music emanates from the windows of countless households making an attempt to scare the daylights out of all the little children. Whereas many Zombie tracks would match on this list, we think Dwelling Dead Lady” is the quintessential Zombie Halloween music. The truth is, whatever really occurs in the song Marquee Moon” might as nicely be taking place on Halloween. Beneath now we have listed our Halloween Prime 5 charts that should provide you with inspiration and enjoyment whatever your plans! It nonetheless sounds creepy and strange now; one of the all-time iconic theme tunes - and it received the last word seal of approval from somebody who is aware of about these things, when Mike Oldfield combined it in with Tubular Bells , creating the final word Halloween mashup. Nursery Rhymes and Songs to Help Counting (PDF) - Learn these nursery rhymes to learn counting from 1 to 10. I have rewritten them a bit on the Halloween Music Lyrics web page to make them extra clear in trendy English. Just the band's title is sufficient to give some individuals a fright, and those with faint-of-heart music taste would certainly discover Jekyll and Hyde” as scary as, say, The Exorcist. The thought of zombies proved too much for my young, fragile thoughts on the time but now it's completely different. It's the single observe that's most related to Halloween shenanigans and general good occasions. If you like listening to Halloween Radio Stations and wanna support us retaining the Halloween Mood alive, you possibly can help by visiting our sponsors. If you're planning to throw a Halloween party for women solely, the track Flesh With out Blood” will enhance your girls' moods. Born and raised in Austin, Texas, Sarah was a mandolin virtuoso at a young age, and began performing with skilled musicians on the tender age of 12. Her stark mandolin and banjo ballads function a bluegrass flair that provides lots of Sarah's songs a Southern Gothic quality. And madness is pretty scary to me. Editor's be aware: This tune was really written throughout Floyd's post-Syd era. Certain, it's the most well-liked Halloween song on YouTube by a substantial issue, but it surely's hardly the only music to get the Halloween bump. A basic animated double-function, one part of this film notably tells the story of the Headless Horseman—an ideal choose for a darkish Halloween night time. Due to that, they associate nursery rhymes with not solely funny rhymes however colourful pictures or imaginative hand movements so toddlers and preschoolers enhance their language skills and their confidence as they act out nursery rhymes. Ask anybody to name a Halloween song, and I'm willing to guess that after Monster mash, Thriller is the second most frequent choice. Was going to pop in ‘Lullaby' but thought it was an excessive amount of of an obvious alternative. Go to The Learning Station online where you may listen to track samples from our whole assortment of award-winning CD's! In true punk rock type, this music talks about conformity, however whereas also containing imagery of Halloween. The scary halloween music is a necessity to the Halloween occasion or other related actions. L.K. Alchin from Nursery Rhymes, Lyrics, and Origins discusses some of the violent and controversial origins. As a result of HIYA it's SJP with superior cleavage and it is spooky as hell from the film Hocus Pocus. And current nonsense rhymes that have been part of this oral custom may very well be used or tailored to make references to current events. The author might attempt to explain their rhymes — often enough, with a parody origin. Choose songs which might be enjoyable for you and are certain to be a success with the company at your subsequent Halloween party! Only a yr or so in the past I was in search of a nursery rhyme guide for her and I purchased a couple of however haven't been thrilled with them. Even if this hadn't been used on the soundtrack to one of many scariest horror motion pictures ever made, it could have been downright sinister on its own. This superior floating ghost found on Dump a Day would make an amazing ornament for a Halloween Get together and it is very easy to make. That is so neat that your son has experienced the magic and mystery of music by means of this little song. This dance basic was been given a monster makeover and remains a agency favourite with many membership-goers. High off your spooky mise en scène with our forty-track set, under, and be sure to subscribe to the Marie Claire Spotify profile for all one of the best playlists. Right here we provide you a list of Prime 5 Halloween songs and the songs for children which make you this day more memorable and Joyful. There's an adult-only party and costume contest scheduled for each Halloween on the Excessive Seas cruise. Counting rhymes similar to One, Two, Buckle My Shoe ” and One Potato, Two Potato” are nursery rhymes that teach numbers and counting to very young children. I think they'll undoubtedly be persevering with this this yr - the Halloween and costume parties had been a huge hit on our cruise, it might be sad in the event that they stopped them.

The 10 scary halloween songs here offered are picked from the Billboard's high halloween songs. Who is aware of the place he was when this befell, but you can't hearken to this track without getting creeped out just a little bit. Somewhere between the swagger of Labyrinth's Goblin King and the ravenous appetite of Bowie's vampiric character in The Starvation, Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps)” is the perfect mixture of gore, glam, and Eighties glitz. From somebody like Alice Cooper, lyrics like Hope you bought your issues together / Hope you might be quite ready to die” may've sounded significantly ghoulish, though in Fogerty's Bayou-via-Bay Area drawl, it comes off extra like an uncle whose calls you should really let go to voicemail. Jack Skellington and firm sings concerning the joys of Halloween in Tim Burton's epic Disney movie. The Addams Family is a classic Halloween movie and the characters make for nice costume inspiration. Read Extra with some fashionable-yet-spooky tunes then Halloween Hipster is your best guess. Right this moment, the ' holiday ' is widely known by kids and adults dressing up in costumes and attending events, the place a number of nice Halloween songs are played, and traditionally numerous games are performed. The hippie vibes of Donovan's psychedelic rock may not appear scary but the music's appeared in every part from Halloween III to American Horror Story. Nursery Rhymes and Lullabies - Ask a mother or father to learn certainly one of these nursery rhymes or lullabies before bed time.

[digitalpaperdoll]

Alongside Animations From Brownielocks.

Take a look at our Halloween music essentials information for the very best places to get your free spooky music. Why It's Nice: The picture of an elephant balancing on a spider internet could have youngsters laughing, and this conventional folk music and kids's rhyme is a good way to get kids to apply counting in a totally fun approach. The lyrics could also be a bit darkish, but the fast tempo of the track and Rihanna's extraordinarily belt-able chorus make for one hell of jam for a Halloween dance ground. Mutts has a ebook club; a goose, one reader, resorts to nursery rhymes very often. Though many of the songs within the Halloween playlist are perfectly superb to be performed at any time of the year, this explicit little gem should be reserved for the Halloween season and will stir up some nostalgic pleasure along with your visitors. With the $3.seventy five obtain comes the precise to make as much as 5 copies of every copyrighted song for no extra charge.

This version of the Skeleton Dance is completed by Tremendous Simple Songs, my children love their version of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star so they're a trusted supply. As children want to be taught to speak just like their dad and mom and teachers, nursery rhymes permit them to say a number of phrases directly and it's fun. Fun With File Folder Games - Learn how one can create enjoyable, visually appealing file folder video games to your periods with preschool and faculty age youngsters. Plus creating this G-Rated Halloween Songs for Children Playlist” has definitely been a artistic, uh, endeavor. These are some very colorful and unique Halloween bingo cards that the youngsters and adults alike are positive to love.

The Wobblin' Goblin by Rosemary Clooney can be found on YouTube someone just found it for me.. it is just a tad diff than I keep in mind, but I discovered the elementary college model as properly. It's totally scary to open your self up to someone sufficient to allow them to affect you that manner, so yes, it's scary. A couple eerie lyrics about being adopted — punched up with slightly '80s pizzaz — make for one spooky song. Silly Songs, a set of about 270 silly songs for teenagers of all ages with lyrics and music to take heed to. A reasonably self-explanatory title masks a surefire occasion starter and a few thoroughly primal rock n' roll. As a trick-or-treater within the ‘80s and ‘90s, I would hear it each Halloween repeated on Rhode Island radio.

I've bought this for my previous children and different individuals's kids because it has the everyday old nursery rhymes, however with neat illustration by varied comic e-book artists. Tip: If you need any of those audio files to be in a distinct format than what you are given, run them by way of a free audio converter Most of the time, you probably need your Halloween sounds to be within the MP3 format so that you could use them on a wide range of units. Should you take pleasure in this best piece of the 8-music collection, Halloween Theme Music, take into account downloading the complete set. It's not just the right Halloween record due to that excellent grinding riff, the excellent cowbell or the umlaut on the of Oyster.

There are various covers of this tune to please the younger generations, however it's unnecessary as this original version has stood the take a look at of time and comes out with weapons blazing. It was within the nineteenth century, when Victorian society sentimentalized childhood and romanticized quaint” instances from the previous, that almost all nursery rhymes had been written down and introduced as for children only. Daisy Lowe and her accomplice Aljaž Skorjanec will bust a transfer to Santa Esmeralda's Please http://video.disney.co.uk/frozen Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, while Danny and Oti will do the Foxtrot to Take me To Church by Hozier. Brian Johnson offers us the Halloween feels by describing himself on a Highway to Hell, which hopefully isn't you this 12 months. Actually, here is a list of Fun Halloween Songs for Youngsters that I'll be singing for the rest of October- whether W likes it or not. The electronic backing beat makes it good for Halloween events, and virtually everybody knows this music. Although, the nursery rhymes are available online but this is a enjoyable approach to introduce youngsters to books. Regardless of some pretty Phantom-ish opening lyrics (If solely you'd have identified me before the accident / For with that grand collision got here a grave consequence”), the Ghosts” haunting singer Ben Gibbard on this Kintsugi single sound most like the melancholy spirits of ‘80s L.A. new wave. Wherever they go, these scary Halloween quotes and sayings remind you about what is it all about!

That comes to mind on Halloween (we've our very own Man Fawkes competition for that) fireworks generally is a great type of leisure to assist your party or event. Although a nice piece of environment, Bauhaus' Bela Lugosi's Dead” lyrics: The bats have left the bell tower, the victims have been bled” are barely a notch above the everyday Halloween card sentiment. There you have got it, 10 songs to be sure to listen to at least as soon as before Halloween is over. Although it might be vulgar, this music would fit in completely at your Halloween celebration this 12 months. Why not be the primary of your folks to host a KILLER (get it?!) Halloween celebration starting with a set piece light up skeleton upon entry, leading to a scary treasure hunt round the spooky decorated backyard ending with a fun finale of fireworks! So thank god for this primitive, staccato wonderment which predated all these witch songs that may come along a decade later with it is cautionary story of the brand new girl on the town, the one with the lengthy black hair and lengthy black automobile who could or is probably not a witch. I significantly like the sweet-bar graph which can flip any Halloween celebration into a math lesson. Disco- themed Halloween celebration: Once you have picked out a theme for your Halloween social gathering, you can also make further preparations in keeping with it, corresponding to decorations, songs and costumes. The evening shows weren't Halloween themed so those should be OK too to your toddler. Not like many of the different songs on our playlist, this timeless number is all about steering away from superstitious beliefs and moving into the Motown groove. We've compiled 31 acceptable (or inappropriate) tunes for the vacation, focusing either particularly on horror motion pictures, the supernatural, or that just have a spooky hook someplace in there.