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variousqueerthings · 4 months ago

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favourie movies i watched for the first time in the first half of 2024

(yeah I originally wrote this post in July and forgot to finish it, shhhhh ignore the date)

a death in the gunj: i went into this one not knowing what was going to happen. it's a profile of a young man who doesn't fit in the world around him, portrayed in a microcosm of familial events -- it was so intensely emotional and set off a lot of the underlying thematic thread of this year's watching

beau travail: this is one of the "top 100 movies lists" movies that i watched and i spent a good deal of it wondering where it was going and what it was exactly doing and we get to the final scene and my mind suddenly flips and goes "oh it's been doing it the whole time!!!" it's a film that felt like i was soaking in it, rather than watching something chronological or putting together a puzzle. white, colonialist toxic masculinity in djibouti and homoeroticism

maurice (vietnamese film club extended edition): i've seen maurice sans these scenes before, but then this youtube channel uploaded a version with the deleted scenes spliced in and ohhh my goodness it gives so much more Moreness to the whole story. i also read the book for the first time afterwards and truly the movie follows it so closely, but yeah. there's something special about maurice, on a meta level as well as quality. doubly so with the deleted scenes

to kill a mockingbird: yeah yeah i'd never seen it before, duh it's a really good movie. tbh i do think there's something in the water of more classic hollywood Cinema. a messy af place, but i'm a sucker for the beautiful acting, astounding scores, the sincerity of the story and the acting. it's a perfect film

the watermelon woman: interestingly, on the flipside of the "movies that mean something" scale, about as non-hollywood as you'll get, a movie about who gets remembered in movies, a movie about documentation, a movie that wanted to make a documentary, but instead is making a movie about trying to make a documentary (that isn't a documentary), a movie about black lesbians throughout history, a movie that was nearly impossible to find for awhile (god bless piracy), a movie about in/visibility

southern comfort: a documentary about the final year of robert eads, who died of what would have been initially treatable ovarian cancer, but who had been told he didn't need his ovaries removed and then later was denied treatment until it was too late. this is incredibly sad, yes, but it's also a movie about the trans south, a community documentation that feels incredible in its existence, a group of people who would risk being forgotten were it not for the hungry, beautiful need to document

the zone of interest: one of two oscar-nominated movies on this list, i had never heard of this term before, which was shocking to me -- but even moreso when i realised how few people in my life knew about the term either. this film is not-about auschwitz from the pov of its commandant, rudolf höss and his family, and about how easy it is to casually dehumanise. the director - a jewish man named jonathan glazer - faced censure for drawing parallels between his movie and the treatment of palestinians, especially considering Big Walls

fahra: a movie based on the real-life recollections of a survivor of the first nabka. fahra gets locked in a cellar while her village is overrun by troops and tries desperately to get out and find her father. the way it's told -- almost never leaving the cellar -- is both deliberate in that this is what happened, but it also serves as an intimate eye through which the audience is given perspective on some of the violence perpetrated during the first nabka and since

the advocate for fagdom: a documentary/portrait of bruce la bruce, the creation of queercore, queer punk scenes in the american 80s, tbh it's just a good time and a good insight into history -- particularly enjoyed the bit where they talked about queer already being not radical enough in the 90s and wanting to shake things up. *glances at corporate queer* oh little did they know (or maybe they did)...

monkey man: i was not necessarily the only trans person at the screening of this film i was at, but i was definitely outnumbered by heterosexual couples and we'll never know what the other cinema-goers felt about it, but this being mainstream-but-not. mainstream, in that dev patel is a name that draws audience, not in that this was all his production and certainly not a massive budget film for what it was doing. mainstream in its cool action set-pieces, not in that it's politically right in your face. dev patel is hot, also

the holdovers: the other oscar-nominated film and one i feel went waaay under the radar. hearkened back to an older era of american film-making that wasn't in a hurry, that had a simple story with deep reservoirs of feeling to tell, with quirky (but real) characters going through things together. the fact that it's set around the vietnam war makes that image even stronger. i just felt things. movie emotions, the emotions you get when you're watching such a solid fucking Movie, yaknow? *harry styles voice* It's a Movie

desire lines: gay trans men and mascs and gay saunas and lou sullivan and documentary but also the story of a middle-aged iranian trans guy who meets a younger american trans guy in an archive and they bond and he gets invited to the trans night at the sauna, i was so emotionally overcome by this film that i couldn't go back to the film festival i was at the entire rest of the weekend (two whole days i missed after this film got to me!!!) where do you hear gay trans men and masc stories? ever???

femme: fucked up gay revenge story in which a black drag queen (played oh so fucking well by nathan stewart-jarrett who is getting what's his after being done dirty by misfits back in the day, oof my boy is killing it in angels of america, in candyman, in this gem!) is hatecrimed by a group of white homophobes, and then proceeds to meet the leader of them in a gay bathhouse... oh if you can deal with the delicious tension of it (practically nonstop) it's so so worth it

secretary: first of two james spaders i watched for the first time, making me come to the realisation that mr spader is a Freak and so so good. a young woman yet to uncover her latent sub-side (the great maggie gyllenhaal) leaves a mental health institution and gets a job as a secretary for an incredibly repressed dom... and youknow....

crash: the other james spader i watched for the first time, ngl i was building to crash because i need to know when sex is going to happen onscreen, i need to approach it from the side, i need to be analytical about it lest it get too discomforting for me. i actually don't mind sex so much onscreen anymore, because im quite desentised to its being "not-real," but it still needs a bit of build. point being, these people get off on car crashes and that part is hot. idk what that says about me (kinky ace)

kamikaze girls: two girls from two different worlds meet, one is a member of an all-girl biker gang, the other wishes for nothing more than to be a rococo era girl (helpless, feminine, prone to fainting, beautiful, cared for). it all gets very gay very fast. this movie was delightful, i had such a good time

angel's egg: i am getting more into watching animation on the whole and so far this is the one that's knocked me the most over the head this year. i cannot describe it, it needs to be watched. it's just visual poetry wrapped in a fairytale wrapped in a series of questions, but you've gotta just... bask. just live in its world

tetsuo: the iron man: feel like there's nothing I can say about this movie that other people haven't said much better. I don't know much about this period of film-making, this feels like the intro to it all (for me), and it's. I mean really I ought to just go out there and make some fucked up movies in black and white with a bunch of simple special effects that come together to leave you oh-so-disturbed. they all become machines and fuck and vore each other i don't know what else to tellya

love lies bleeding: idk what to tell you man. fucked up lesbians. greasy smoker butch stewart, who's jonesing the entire time and so fucking into her pretty bodybuilder girlfriend who you think is the reasonable part of the equation but truly truly not. there's some body-stuff in there i did not expect. everyone is kind of terrible, and the score is great. lesbian crime hits different, it just does

SO FAR TOP MOVIES FOR THE SECOND HALF OF THE YEAR: Flee I Saw The TV Glow Death By Hanging It Must Be Heaven The Act Of Killing/The Look Of Silence Becket This Is Not A Film

#cinema #film #queer cinema #movies #there are other movies i watched that were Good or that i Enjoyed #but these are like. the ones for me

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akingdomofswordsandstories · 4 years ago

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Unrequited

azriel (acotar) x reader

Summary: takes place during acofas, you and Azriel are mates but he doesn’t know it yet, angst, fluff, and everything in between

*Also this is my first imagine ever so I'm sorry if it sucks lol! There will be a part 2 to this, but I am still working on it!!

word count: 3927

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The winter solstice was in a few days and you weren’t sure what to get some of the inner circle. You walked briskly down the streets of the Rainbow, chilled to the bone due to the wind. You had made the dumb mistake of rushing out of the townhouse - to avoid any questions of where you were going - without taking your scarf. Your current outfit, which was a chunky knit blue sweater with leggings and boots, wasn’t enough to keep the chill away. But the cold wasn’t the most important thing on your mind. You had already bought presents for Rhys, Feyre, Amren, and Elain, but that left Cassian, Mor, and Azriel. Mor and Cass would be pretty easy to buy for, but you put it off knowing they would look through your room trying to find their solstice gift. But Azriel, that would be much harder.

Every waking hour, the shadowsinger haunted your thoughts. Something you had come to conclude was unrequited.

You had realized the mating bond between you two before he did.

It had clicked a few months ago while on a diplomatic mission. The aftermath of Hybern had left things chaotic, and if you were being honest, it still was. Rhys decided to send Cassian, Mor, Azriel, and you to travel to some of the other courts to bring back reports on the recovery after the war. However, traveling did have some dangers. While you were on your way back to Velaris from the Winter Court, your group was ambushed by a group of Hybern soldiers who had been hiding out in the mountains. Had it not been for Azriel’s wings shielding you from the initial arrows, you would’ve surely been dead, and that’s when it clicked for you. But like an idiot, you didn’t say anything.

You had thought if the bond had clicked for you, it would've clicked for Azriel too. You realized your mistake when Azriel hadn’t acknowledged any change between you two. You hoped that he would figure it out in the coming weeks, but he didn’t. You knew the same sort of situation happened with feyre and rhys so you still held out some hope. But as the months went by, and you realized the bond still hadn’t clicked for Azriel and it felt too late to tell him.

At least that was the excuse you made up. Truly, you were also afraid of the rejection that could have followed. You weren’t a fool, you knew him and Elain had some sort of connection, and that shattered your dreams even more. The possibility that he wouldn’t accept the mating bond to be with the fair skinned, doe eyed fae. Everytime Azriel was in the same room as Elain, she was the only thing he would pay attention to. During gatherings, you would plaster on a smile and act as if you were happy, but Cassian and Mor, your best friends, could sense your discomfort. They tried to ask you about it, but seeing as you would shut down anything they said, they decided not to pry too much. Amren ended up figuring out the source of your discomfort had to do with Azriel, but kept your secret until you would be ready to share it.

You came to the conclusion that distancing yourself from him would be the best option, so that's what you did.

You walked down the street till you got to one of the finest seamstresses is Velaris. Since you were an artist like Feyre, you decided to draw out a dress and have it made for Mor. The color was blood red, her signature. It was a silk slip dress that would come down to her mid-lower calf and it would be embroidered with a brilliant gold thread. You drew out a pattern of the sun, stars, and moon, which you hoped she would like. To go along with Mor’s dress, you got a jeweler to make a custom necklace and bracelet set to go with it. You designed more dainty jewelry that had gold stars with diamonds, since she was a dreamer.

You decided to design Cassian’s gift as well, creating a beautiful silver and black dagger with a moonstone on the hilt. It was a beautiful dagger, but you also made sure it was usable, because you would hate for it to go to waste. To add onto the combat theme, you also decided to buy him new fighting leathers with touches of red embroidery to match his siphons. Lastly, you bought Cassian a bottle of fae wine, which definitely wouldn't last long.

The last thing you got for all three of you was a friendship necklace. Although that sounds corny, the two of them had become such a positive force in your life and you couldn’t imagine life without them. Keeping with the celestial theme for the friendship necklaces, you bought a sun, a moon, and a star. The sun for Cassian, the moon for Mor, and the star for you. Although they are opposites in some ways, all three need each other, just like the three of you needed each other.

Now that you had gotten Mor’s and Cassian’s solstice gifts figured out, it was onto Azriel’s gift. You honestly had no clue what to get him. Due to distancing yourself, you weren’t sure if there was something that he wanted. You were positively stumped. Lucky for you though, you ended up spotting Mor in another shop a few stores down from where you were, most likely getting the rest of her solstice gifts. You decided to sneak up on her as a friendly prank. Grabbing her shoulders, you yelled in her ear, making her jump.

“Oh mother above, it’s just you, y/n! You scared the life out of me” Mor said.

“Doing some last minute shopping?” you asked. “I could ask you the same thing”. Giving her a playful smack on the arm, the corners of your mouth curled upward, even the simplest remark from her could make you smile.

The two of you were currently standing in front of a jewelry shop, looking at the collections of necklaces and earrings through the window. “Wow” you breathed out “These are all so beautiful”

“Indeed they are, although they’re quite pricey”

“How pricey is pricey?”

She whispered the amount in your ear and you stopped breathing for a second, “Holy Mother wow, that is quite the price tag. At least we can admire it from a far”, you laughed out. Even though you got a very generous salary from Rhys, you still felt guilty spending so much money on materialistic things.

After a moment you said, “Actually, since you’re here, I do need help finding a solstice gift for Azriel”, softening your voice at the end, “Any ideas?” you asked, drawing out the syllables.

“Well, I always get Azriel some cool towels, clothing, or a dagger!” Mor said. A small scoff came out of my mouth as I shook my head and raised my eyebrows. “Fine!” she exclaimed, “I may have overheard him needing a new leather sheath for Truth Teller.” grumbling towards the end. “Oh that sounds great, thank you for the help! Now let’s go off to the closest leather goods store and find a sheath!”.

“y/n! I still have shopping to do” a scowl appearing on her face. “Fine, I guess I’ll just call Cassian, cause his judgement might be better than yours, when it comes to knife related things of course” you said, baiting her.

“Ugh, I hate you y/n”

“I hate you too Mor”

“Fine, let's get going before I change my mind” she grumbled. Then we took off down the streets of the Rainbow to find a sheath.

The task was easier said than done, for you at least. Being indecisive and a major over thinker, you had looked through close to 100 sheaths, but none of them seemed good enough to hold the blade that Azriel never let anyone else touch. Except Elain.

While you were lost in your thoughts, you laid your y/c eyes on the perfect sheath. It had a bright cobalt blue stitching to match Az’s siphons. Along the tip and lining the top of the leather was a thin coat of silver plating with little sapphires embedded in the metal. You quickly snatched it up and paid a hefty price for it, but it was perfect.

“Thank god you finally picked one, it felt like we were in that store for centuries”. Mor sighed, probably a sigh of relief for getting out of the store, “But y/n, it’s perfect, I know Azriel will love it”

“Do you really think so? I just want it to be the perfect gift and I’m scared he won’t like it because what if it’s too simplistic and what if-”

“Hey! It's perfect! Don’t stress too much y/n. And for the record, I think that you’re an amazing gift giver - the amount of thought you put into gifts make it all the better.”

You could feel a blush creeping up your cheeks and mumbled a small thank you.

“Anyway while we’re here do you need to get anything to go with your solstice outfit?”

“Oh Actually, I was so stressed about getting everyone’s solstice gift that I forgot to buy my dress” your voice falling off at the end. You felt yourself being yanked to a harsh stop and the saw Mor’s face staring at yours, mouth gaping and eyes wide.

“Are you crazy?? Solstice is in 3 days and you still don’t have anything??? Oh honey, our shopping isn’t done yet.” And with that statement you found yourself being pulled into the nearest dress shop. After trying on nearly 20 dresses you finally found the perfect one, which Mor approved. It was a light blue silk dress that was more fitted at the top but flared down at your waist. It had a cowl neckline, a slit going up the side to the mid upper thigh, and accentuates your curves beautifully and has a slight shimmer to it. You looked ethereal in it

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After your exhausting day of shopping, you couldn’t wait to get out of the cold. You swiftly walked back to the townhouse. Once inside you made your way to your room to set down the gifts, change your clothes, and grab your book. Then you quietly headed down to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of tea and sat on the couch to read. The house was quiet since all of the others decided to go to Rita’s tonight. You decided to stay home for some much needed relaxation. You opened your book and started reading. After a few hours, you felt your eyes drooping and eventually, sleep consumed you.

The loud noise of the front door caused you to stir and your eyes fluttered open. You were too exhausted to look so you just laid your head back down and tried to go to sleep. You could hear Mor whispering something and then felt yourself being lifted off the couch and being held close to a chest with your blanket still draped on you.

“Cass?” you whispered hoarsely along with a string of incoherent words

You heard a slight laugh “Not Cass but It’s ok, go back to sleep”. Then you felt yourself being gently placed on your bed and the sleep hit you before you could mutter a thank you.

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The sun was setting towards the sea as you sat in the sitting room of the town house. You were in your blue silk dress with a glass of wine in your hand. Rhys and Feyre were by the mantel, quietly talking while Mor and Amren were across the room. Near the window I saw Elain, and from the corner of my eye I could see Azriel making his way towards her. My face fell but I quickly plastered on a smile, not wanting to concern anyone. Especially since today was also Feyre’s birthday and we had planned a surprise for her. Feyre thought she could slip her birthday past us, but we hadn’t forgotten. After a few minutes, Cassian made his way from the kitchen with the enormous cake.

You floated towards Feyre and gave her arm a light squeeze. “Happy Birthday, make a wish before the candles melt!”

She blew out the candles and then we ate cake before opening up the presents.

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Rhys snapped his fingers and piles of brightly wrapped bags and boxes filled up the sitting room. Amren was the first to open her presents. Naturally, everyone got her something jewelry related. Amren opened mine and you saw a wide smile set across her face, she picked up the diamond necklace and nodded a ‘thank you’ your way. You returned the gesture back, a small smile forming on your face.

Next, Cassian handed Mor her present from him and she pulled out a-. You couldn’t believe what you were seeing. He bought her red lingerie. Your face turned slightly red, but the Mor said “Don’t let him fool you: he couldn’t think of a damn thing to get me, so he gave up and asked me outright. I gave him precise orders. For once in his life, he obeyed them.”

Then, you heard one sharp knock at the door.

Nesta.

You saw Cassian tense up a bit. Nesta walked in, linking arms with Elain. She got a glass of wine before heading to sit in a chair in the back of the room. The silence was deafening. Finally Varian started talking and the present opening resumed.

From Amren, you received a new calligraphy set. It was so beautiful and you loved it. From Rhys, you got some books. It was perfect since you loved to read, and they were ones that you had been wanting to read for a long time. From Feyre, you received a painting as well as a new paint brush kit.

Cassian made his way to you and set a gift down in your lap. You opened the dark blue box that Cassian had placed in your lap. He had gotten you a sky blue hardbound journal with a gold embossed star on it. You desperately needed a new one, and this was perfect. You walked over and gave him a hug, whispered “Thank you, I love it.”.

Next you opened Mor’s present. You nearly choked when you saw what she got you and your whole face heated up. She got you a matching navy blue lingerie set like the one Cassian bought her.

“Yeah, I wasn’t too sure what to get you so I thought we could twin”. You looked around the room and saw the others holding in their laughs. You could’ve sworn you saw a tinge of red on Azriel’s ears. You just smiled and mouthed a silent “I’m going to kill you, but thank you” at her.

There wasn’t anything from Azriel. Your heart twinged. Had you not been important enough? It was just a present you reminded yourself, fixing your composure before handing Cassian his present.

He ripped it open like an animal, squealing when he saw it. A promising reaction given the amount of thought you put into it.

“Did you design these? They look amazing!”

“Yeah, I’m glad you like it. It took a long time to figure out what to get for your dumb ass”

“You mean my cute ass”, you smacked his arm and then got up to give Mor her present.

You closely watched her reaction as she opened her dress and jewelry, a large smile spreading across her face.

“You really buy the perfect presents y/n, I love it”.

“Oh Cass, Mor. One more thing.” You pulled out the small boxes with the friendship necklaces and bracelets handing it to them. “This was just a little something extra I thought of, I hope you like it”. You knew you would have started stuttering and crying if you had said the meaning to them, so you just handed them notes instead. They read over them, eyes glossing over, and pulled you into a hug.

“This is the only time I’ll wear jewelry” Cass stated, causing you to chuckle

Then Mor said, “I am never taking this off” causing you to laugh again.

Finally, Azriel opened up his presents. He had opened up all the others. All that was left was yours and Elain’s gift to him. He found his way to your present first, opening it.

“A new sheath for Truth Teller. I heard you needed a new one” you quietly said.

He held your gaze and smiled, “Thank you, it's great”. Suddenly feeling exposed, you quickly gave him a nod.

Then he went to open Elain’s gift. “It’s a powder to mix in with any drink.” she said.

Silence.

Elain bit her lip and then smiled sheepishly. “It’s for the headaches everyone always gives you. Since you rub your temples so often.”

Silence again.

Then Azriel tipped his head back and laughed.

You hadn’t heard him laugh before, and mother above it was gorgeous. You had never heard a sound so deep and joyous, a sound which made your heart clench. A part of you wished you were the reason he was laughing. You forced on a smile and spent the rest of the night drinking away the slight pain in your chest.

You were exhausted by the end of the night, sitting on the couch with Cassian and Mor, Azriel and Rhys seated on the opposite side of you.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw movement towards the door, and craned your head to see what was going on. It was Nesta making her way to the door. You felt the couch lift next to you.

Cassian. He had swiftly pushed past Feyre and went after Nesta. This wouldn’t end well.

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Cassian had come back quiet and brooding, walking straight to the kitchen to pour himself a glass of liquor. You got up off the couch and followed him straight into the kitchen.

“Cass, let’s take a walk, yeah?”

“I just took a walk”

“It wasn’t a question”. You grabbed a white shawl and his hand and led him outside. “What happened?”

“What’s there to talk about? It was like all the other times. Why did I have to fall in love with someone who doesn't even love me back. Who looks at me like the Illyrian born bastard I am. Who hates the idea of being in the same room as me.”

You grabbed Cass’ hand, lightly squeezing it. “Don’t say that. Nesta, she,” your voice stopping for a second “She’s different. The way she handles pain and copes is different. Give her time. She just needs time. I know how much that may pain you, but you can’t rush healing”

You pulled him into a hug

“And for the record, I know the feeling more than you know” you quietly said “unrequited love”, head pointed at the ground.

Cassian tilted his head down to look at you, his face painted with confusion. You could tell he wanted to know more, but didn’t want to pry too much.

You hesitated before continuing, not sure if you wanted to reveal your closely guarded secret. “I-“ your voice faltering, “I found my mate”. The words seemed to have rushed out of your mouth and tears pricked your eyes as you said that. After months of hiding it, you had finally gotten it off your chest.

Cassian stood shocked, staring at you. “You found your mate? And you didn’t think to tell any of us? How long ago was this”

“I-, I found out who he was around the same time Rhys sent us on that diplomatic mission. And I didn’t tell anyone because he doesn’t even know yet.”

“That was almost 6 months ago, and you didn’t say anything?”.

The tears had started flowing at this point, “I thought he would figure it out. But by the time I realized he wasn’t going to figure it out, it was too late. He had already set his eyes on someone else. And I know I could never compete with Elain, even if I am his mate.” the last part slipped out without you realizing.

“Elain? What does she-“ his eyes widening “Does that mean Az is-“

You slowly nodded, tears welled up, threatening to spill out.

“Oh, mother…”, he pulled you into a tighter hug and that’s when the gates broke. You couldn’t hold back your tears as you sobbed into Cassian's chest, his hand stroking your back.

you must have been there for 15 minutes before you realized the other might start getting suspicious. Regaining your composure, you dried your tears and tried, to the best of your ability, to hide that you had been crying.

Looking back at Cassian, you gave him a slight smile before muttering, “Thank you. I’m sorry for dumping that on you, but please promise me you won’t tell anyone. Please.”

“Of course y/n, and don’t apologize, if it makes you feel better, it helped to take my mind off of Nesta and my own problems, which I desperately needed” he chuckled out.

With the smile still on your face, you linked arms with Cassian before saying, “Oh mother above it’s freezing, let’s get back inside before we turn into popsicles!”

He let out another laugh before the two of you made your way back into the house.

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You walked into the house and your sliver of happiness was crushed as you saw Az and Elain sitting at the table smiling and laughing quietly to themselves. Elain had her sketchbook out, showing Az her plans for the garden.

Your distraught had been clear to anyone who saw your face, and you were too tired to realize you weren’t able to hide it fast enough. Not being able to view the scene anymore, you quickly got up, muttered happy solstice, and grabbed your coat and purse before heading out the door to your apartment.

While walking home, you were consumed by your thoughts. You hated the pangs of jealousy that coursed through you. You often found yourself jealous of her soft spokenness and kindness. You also found yourself jealous of her effortless beauty. It was something that kept you up at night. She was so likeable and easily approachable, something you wished you were.

You were so drowned in your own thoughts that you hadn’t noticed a male following you till it was too late. One of his hands clamped on your mouth while the other grabbed your waist and pushed you into the nearest alleyway.

The male pulled out a knife and your tears started to fall. You were terrified about what he would do to you. This could be the last time you would have seen your family. You were struggling and kicking against him but it was no use. Your senses were groggy from the alcohol and drowsiness.

You had been so stupid to walk home alone at 2 in the morning. No matter how angry you were, you should’ve just stayed at the town house.

Before you could realize what was happening, you felt a sharp pain shoot through your side.

The sound of a clatter.

Receding footsteps.

A crimson stain blooming.

Your body crumpled to the ground and your vision started blacked out. This was it. Nobody could hear you and nobody could save you.

#azriel x reader #acotar x reader #acotar #azriel #cassian #imagine #sarah j maas #azriel acotar x reader

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cosplayinamerica · 4 years ago

Photo

Cosplay Repair by Rocket Props

My name is Jacob LaRocca. I am an electro-mechanical engineer, who has always been a scifi, fantasy, video game, and comic nerd. I played with legos and k'nex my whole life, and that translated into a bit of a niche medium in middle school -- Duct Tape. I'm not talking about duct tape wallets, or things like that. I'm talking about prop swords, axes, weapons, and larger models. It only grew from there.

All through college, I found myself commissioned to make props and models, mostly swords and hand prop replicas from movies and video games. I attended my first New York Comicon in 2012, and IMMEDIATELY was hooked. I attended a number of conventions, and started to interview prop and costume YouTubers for a podcast at the time.

This is really where my passion started to grow. I found some people in my area who also loved cosplay, and we started hanging out and making together.

My first Dragon Con was where the itch to repair costumes hit me. I was still only starting to develop my own skills in cosplay, and had only brought one costume. After wearing the costume for a few days (and through the parade) there were a number of reasons why I didn't want to keep wearing it.

I realized that I had brought nearly ALL of my supplies with me as I hadn't finished it before I arrived, so I went to the pharmacy, bought a huge piece of cardboard, some markers, and a few things I didn't have with me and started repairing costumes. I've attached a picture of the sign.

The response was overwhelmingly positive, and I got to meet SO many incredible people and cosplayers, as that year, the con didn't have a booth for repairs. I absolutely loved getting to see people's costumes up close, and as a cosplayer myself, It made me so happy to be able to help people fix the unexpected problems they weren't prepared to, and let them show off all the hard work and passion they put in!

I think the most fun part so far, is trying to figure out how to fix things with whatever is on hand. Its a fun and interesting problem, and rather than carrying EVERYTHING possible, I've narrowed down my tool set to basically be able to fix 95% of the problems I encounter.

This Zoidberg Jesus by @KevinClose is still one of my FAVORITE stories to tell. I fixed a few of the parts of his costume over the course of this Dragoncon because I vividly remember fixing his claw, and hearing this very Zoidberg-like noise as he slurped the built up condensation out of the glove that had been spirit gummed to his face. It was so gross and hilarious, I could barely fix his claw. Cosplay has brought so much to my life. I am a people person, and always have been, so the aspect of community is a huge part of it. I love seeing people passionate about something, and I love helping them express that passion. I currently teach classes in foam fabrication, and am constantly 3D printing something for the myself of someone else.

For the most part, the cosplay community is incredibly welcoming to any and all. I think the biggest thing cosplay has brought to my life is a little bit of focus on where to spend my boundless creative energy that a day job doesn't necessarily let me use.

Cosplay can literally involve any amount of fabrication techniques, power tools, hand tools, and more. It has given me the excuse to expand my toolset and knowledge to use every single tool in the 40k square foot makerspace I am a member of.

Mostly, I feed of others' passion, so when someone is passionate about cosplay or character, or a character in a movie has clearly been designed with passion and skill, I immediately feed off that passion and can create something myself using that energy. Eventually, I hope to turn Rocket Props into a full time job, educating, creating, and making things that inspire people.

I am open for commissions, both for 3D modeling and fabrication.

Find out more http://www.rocket-props.com/

Total Repairs since 2015 Cosplay Repairs: 2500 + Record in One Convention: 372 over 4 Days (SDCC 2017) Bottles of SuperGlue Used : 21 Bottles of Accelerant Used : 3 Sticks of Hot Glue Used : 100+ Bobby Pins: 300+ Safety Pins: 2000+ Shoes Repaired : 30+ Sewing Repairs : 500+ Duct Tape Rolls Used: 10+ Gaff Tape Rolls Used: 10+ Zip Ties Used : 500+

You can see the full list of tools I carry on my website, but I would say you can fix the majority of problems with the following.

Medium Viscosity Superglue Superglue Accelerant Hot Glue Gun (Batter Powered or Lighter) Black Gaff Tape Heavy Duty Duct Tape Bobby Pins Safety Pins Wig Tape (Useful for all SORTS of things) Sewing Kit with Straight and Curved Needles Leather Awl with Waxed Nylon Thread

BONUS: Bamboo Skewers

#cosplay repair #cosplay 911 #dragoncon #nycc #sdcc #cosplay medic #cosplay #cosplay interview

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kakakakashi · 4 years ago

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Hokage’s Office: The Door

100 Follower Celebration - Day 5

Kakashi Hatake x Reader || NSFW

Warnings: porn without plot, Kakashi’s a smug motherfucker, cursing obviously, overstimulation, idk man, you know what you’re getting into by day 5

Word count: 2,855

A/N: I think this one is my favorite tbh.

Irritated was an understatement for how Kakashi currently felt. He’d been dealing with too many frivolous problems all day long. Even with Shizune and Yamato’s help, Kakashi was still up to his neck in bullshit. He was the Hokage for crying out loud.

When he trudged back into his office with a cup of black coffee to help get him through the day, he found you swaying back and forth in his chair with your feet propped on the edge of the desk while you read his work copy of Icha Icha Paradise. Frankly, Kakashi didn’t have the patience for this.

You’d made him late this morning after trying to entice him with morning sex, but Yamato had ended up knocking on his door right when things were getting good. His friend insisted that they were both needed in the office, and he was sent to make sure Kakashi was okay. Kakashi ended up going into work only for you to pester him all day until now.

“Feet off the desk,” he demanded in an exasperated, low tone. You rolled your eyes at him, pretending like you didn’t hear while you flipped a page in the book. “Don’t think I didn’t see you roll your eyes.”

“Fine,” you huffed, allowing your feet to loudly plop on the floor, hoping to get your point across that a lot worse things have happened to the desk. However, Kakashi seemed to snap at your brattiness, stalking forward until his large frame towered over you.

“I’ve had it with your attitude.” Your wide eyes met his narrowed one for a moment before he threw you over his shoulder and carried you towards the door. “You think I don’t know exactly what you’re doing? I don’t have time for your immature little act. I really don’t want to give into you, but maybe if I do fuck you, you’ll finally do something more productive with your time.”

He flung you from his shoulder so your back lightly smacked against the door. He knew exactly where to position you so that when he put you down, you were only an inch off the ground with his thigh between your legs and his hands beside your head.

His flaming eye and intimidating stature had you panting, allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable with no way to escape. Gazing at him, you’re reminded that he is a deadly shinobi, and you’re also painfully aware that you want him to ruin you.

“By the time I’m finished with you, you’ll be lucky if you can walk out of here.”

His voice sent a shiver of arousal down your spine, settling in your lower stomach while his fingers fiddled with your pants until they were undone. Once they were about to fall off your hips, he knelt down on the floor, not breaking eye contact with you until his gloved hands fisted in the fabric of your pants to tug them off along with your underwear. He maneuvered one of your feet out of the fabric before hooking it over his shoulder, effectively spreading your legs for him. Meanwhile, his free hand already had a finger hooked in the edge of his mask.

Watching him in this position had your pulse racing. The sin behind his eyes had you weak at the knees, and he knew he had you right where he wanted you. If his eyes didn’t say it, the smug smirk he exposed when he pulled his mask down sure did. He mumbled, “You know the word.”

“Yes.”

His gaze darted down from your eyes to between your legs where you knew you were already wet. The air felt far too cold hitting your folds, and you knew Kakashi would taunt you for being so eager. As if reading your mind, you heard the chuckle he let out under his breath. Your eyes fluttered closed in anticipation, your palms flat against the door balling into fists out of frustration. However, you nearly lost your balance when Kakashi’s tongue unexpectedly darted out to give a gentle lick to your folds.

The gasp that tore from your mouth had him laughing to himself again, his huffed breath fanning against your slick core, prompting another shiver throughout your body. Kakashi’s gloved palms gently took hold of your thigh over his shoulder along with your other hip before he buried his face between your legs and pressed his tongue to your clit, circling the small bud to give you the friction you desperately craved.

A soft, breathy whine escaped your throat while one of your hands gently threaded your fingers through his hair in encouragement. He retreated for only a moment, licking a thick stripe from your entrance to your clit, where he flicked at it with the tip of his tongue only to wrap his lips around it and suck. Your back arched into the contact, head flung back, and you could feel Kakashi’s smirk against your pussy. His tongue began drawing patterns, making your breath hitch in your throat with each stroke of his tongue. You did your best to stay still against the door, well aware of why Kakashi wanted you in that exact spot.

He kept working you so well with his tongue, alternating from his incoherent patterns in favor of dragging his mouth down to your entrance where his tongue circled you before dipping inside. You glanced at Kakashi only to find him completely concentrated, filthily pumping his tongue inside you while pleasure gradually accumulated in your body. The sight of him, eyes closed and swollen lips lapping at you like you were his last meal had you biting your lip to keep from moaning, but Kakashi knew what you had done.

He retracted his tongue and licked his slick, swollen lips before his eyes met yours. He demanded in a rough voice, “Let me hear you.”

“Kakashi, someone’s going to hear.” You panted out, trying your best to hiss at him, but your words only came out more desperate than anything.

Kakashi’s lips were on your inner thigh now, his teeth nipping on the skin hard enough to leave a mark. The sensation had your hips involuntarily bucking in search of friction, and Kakashi’s lips tugged upward. “Darling,” he mumbled with his lips still brushing against the tender flesh so close to where you needed him, “we both know you love the thought of someone hearing us as much as I do, so don’t play so coy.”

Your head rolled back again while you whined out wantonly, your brows furrowed in frustration. Of course the little shit knew what he was doing when he put you against the door. He wanted people to hear you, how much you wanted him. It never ceased to amaze him how such a powerful person who was feared by nations would turn to putty in his hands, begging for him so desperately it would make Jiraya blush.

“Go, on. Let everyone hear those pretty little sounds you make for me.” His mouth found its way to your clit again, puckering his lips around it and sucking hard. The shock of the sensation had you drawing in a loud gasp, and Kakashi’s words rumbled against your heat, “Attagirl.”

That drew a soft moan out of you, and it only continued to motivate him to get more out of you. He began using his tongue again, tilting his head to cover more area while your grip on his hair tightened a bit. Your hips loosened up with each roll of his tongue against you until he did something that made them stutter unexpectedly. He repeated his previous action, and a sound caught in your throat. He continued that motion, alternating between it and sucking on your clit just how you liked it, even going so far as to scrape his teeth against the bud a few times just to get you to cry out in shock.

The cloudier your mind got, the louder your soft sounds of pleasure became, and the louder you were, the more Kakashi gave you. When you began to feel that all-consuming flame in your gut, you started moving your hips in time with Kakashi’s mouth, causing his fingers to dig into your flesh in encouragement.

He sucked on your clit at one particular angle, and a particularly loud moan came tumbling from your lips. It made Kakashi’s mouth vibrate with a grunt against your cunt, and you didn’t care anymore. You couldn’t keep your noises to yourself while you began guiding his head by his hair. It only made him moan more. After all, Kakashi loved it when you pulled his hair. With newfound motivation, he was eager to please, driving you closer to the edge with each lap.

“Fuck, you’re too good at this,” you moan out, “Kakashi!”

His hand on your hip slipped down your leg, encouraging you to spread your legs a little wider, and you obliged, trusting him to not let you fall. The new angle had you hurtling towards your orgasm more, that fire in your gut spreading to your entire body, concentrated mostly where Kakashi sucked at you.

You could feel yourself climbing closer to that peak, your body beginning to lose control with each passing moment. Kakashi was obviously aware with the way your pussy quivered around nothing, and just when you were about to cum, he retreated.

You were about to yank his hair to get him back in place, but you knew he’d leave you like this if you did anything like that after everything you’d done before now.

“Did I say you could cum?” He looks like he’s about to scold you with the way his brow is cocked, and you quietly sob out in response.

“No,” you confess, “I’m so sorry. I promise I’ll be good. Just, don’t stop. Please.”

He licks his lips while he admires the wreck he’s made of you. Internally, Kakashi debated if he should humor you or if he should wait until you calmed down so he could really drag it out. You had been waiting for this since you woke up, so he decided to oblige you, but not without warning you, “Very well, but you don’t get to cum until I say you do or else.”

“Yes,” you nodded, “yes, I understand.”

Thankfully, Kakashi dove back in between your legs and started working you up again. You were throbbing against him while he worked your body like only he could. Your nails dug into your palms, releasing his hair in fear that you’d hold him against you until you came.

Kakashi resumed his pace, but he started developing a new pattern. He was well aware that you’d come sooner than he wanted if he continued with the previous one. However, the more he worked you, the more you couldn’t bear it. The fire in you burned your skin so beautifully, it practically consumed you while you moaned his name. And without even realizing, the cord deep inside you snapped, your legs shaking while you released all over Kakashi’s face while his lips assaulted your abused clit. You cried out softly while your hips bucked against his face. You didn’t notice the disapproving glare on his face while he continued to suck, working you through your orgasm.

However, once you came down, Kakashi tossed your leg to the floor and stood up, licking his lips before wiping his mouth on his glove.

“Did I say you could cum?” he repeated his earlier question, this time much more taken aback than before. You deliberately disobeyed him, and he was not happy.

With wide eyes, you realized your mistake. “No,” you softly yelped, “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to. It just snuck up on me.”

Kakashi took the opportunity to loosen his own pants before he caged you in against the door between his arms. His eyes bore into yours when he replied. “No, I didn’t. Did you really need it so badly that you couldn’t even wait for me to give you permission?” He paused. “Fine, you want to cum. You’re gonna cum again and again until I tell you to stop. We’re not finished here just because you came.”

His eyes never left yours while he freed his dripping erection from his slack pants before he wedged a knee between your legs and spread them apart. Taking one of them, he hooked it around his hips while he ground his member against your soaked folds. You mewled at the contact, grinding your hips in time with his while he covered himself in your arousal before he lined up with your entrance, catching inside you before his free palm grabbed at your other thigh, encouraging you to wrap them around his hips. You obliged, and he used the momentum to thrust into you with one hard thrust, trapping your body between his and the door.

You cried out at the sensation of Kakashi stretching your walls almost too much. His hips began slamming into yours mercilessly, not even giving you time to adjust while he set his own pace. The door behind you was thumping with every thrust of his hips into yours, sheathing himself so deep inside you, you thought he might split you in half. Each drag of his cock inside you had you getting louder until you were screaming his name in pleasure. You were still throbbing uncontrollably from your previous orgasm, and Kakashi was giving you too much. In his grip, you couldn’t even squirm much, his grip on your hips holding you right where he wanted you, and all you could do was grip onto his broad shoulders.

The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room while Kakashi filled you to the hilt over and over until tears prickled at your eyes. “Please!” you begged him through a strangled cry, “Kakashi, it’s too much.”

He grunted in your ear, not even bothering to slow the merciless piston of his hips into yours. “You’re gonna be a good girl and take what I give you, and you’re gonna thank me for it because you were begging for it earlier.”

You moaned so loud your throat cracked. There was no way of knowing if you cried for him to stop or to continue when you replied, “Please!”

His hips crashed against yours, grinding against your clit beautifully with the position, Kakashi’s thick cock rubbing you just the right way while he ripped you apart. When you practically jerked in pleasure, Kakashi knew he’d found that spot inside you, angling you perfectly so his erratic thrusts hit that spot every time.

He was fucking you like an animal up against the door. It was obvious to anyone who passed by exactly what was going on behind closed doors, but you couldn’t find it in you to care when your body lost control, winding tighter and tighter the more Kakashi pleasured you.

“Look at you,” he groaned, biting at the flesh of your neck, “I bet everyone in the building knows what I’m doing to you right now. They probably think you’re a dirty little girl for fucking me in my office in the middle of the day, but I bet you like that.”

You screamed. You were so close you could taste your next orgasm. With Kakashi pounding into you mercilessly, his balls slapping against your ass with every frantic thrust, you were already clamping down on his shaft inside you. He was close too, though, his hips bucking at a less steady pace each time. You could feel his member twitch inside you with a particularly good thrust, and you knew the second that knot in you snapped, he would follow.

“Yes. That’s it. Cum on my cock,” Kakashi practically growled in your ear, and that was all it took for you to break, every nerve in your body unraveling with a snap. You clung to him while your body shook, mind going into a blissful haze.

Kakashi’s hips stuttered for a final time before he was following you, emptying his load inside you with a series of grunts and curses while both of you twitched until you came down from your intense highs.

When you finally had some sense back, you unhooked your legs from Kakashi, placing them shakily on the floor while simultaneously slipping his softening length out of you. You tried to stand, but you almost fell, barely catching yourself on the door handle before you could tumble to the floor. Thankfully, Kakashi also reached out to help steady you. Although he appeared to be just as shaky as you were.

It took a minute for you to regain your bearings. Your entire lower body felt like it might give out at any moment, and all you could do was lean against the door with Kakashi while the sticky mix of cum dripped down your legs. It didn’t bother you in the slightest, though. Kakashi and you were happy to simply gaze at each other, trying to steady your breaths between soft, loving kisses.

#cherry's 100 follower celebration #naruto imagines #kakashi x reader #cherry has ideas sometimes #hi. i’m cherry queen of the sin bin.#100 #cherry posts about ninja nerds #200

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noperopesaredope · 3 years ago

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Ok, so, new (actually pretty old, but I revamped most of it) fic idea!

I remembered this bad boy sitting way in the back of my pile of old fic ideas I nearly went through with, touched it up, and shall now pitch it to all my fellow Varian fans out there! (most of it was original, but then I changed it up because I was inspired by shows like “What If...” and “Loki”, so you may see some similarities, but those ideas were already there a few years before those shows, they just looked a bit different)

This post is long, so if you want to hear about it, just click the read more button.

Plot

So, this fic starts post-series, about 4 months after the finale (maybe more). Varian finds some old Demanitus designs (or maybe a hidden room full of weird equipment), and Varian being Varian decides to build it. He ends up making a weird mask and glove (the glove has a weird circle symbol on it with a couple of runes). He ends up somehow pricking his finger and some of his blood drips on the center of the circle. Varian thinks nothing of it and moves on, trying to figure out what the glove/mask can do and how he can activate them.

Suddenly, (while he’s wearing them) they start working, and a smallish portal opens up from underneath him, which he falls through. Suddenly, he’s in a whole new place, very different from anywhere he had ever seen. He begins walking around, exploring, and sees amazing things, like dragons and magic and stuff, just out and about. It’s straight up HIGH fantasy. He’s like an isekai protagonist in a fantasy world.

While Varian’s walking around, he is suddenly attacked by a group of generic monsters, but a mysterious stranger saves him. He thanks the stranger, whose face is covered, and asks if they can tell him where he is. The stranger looks him up and down before saying “far away from your home, Varian. Very far away.” Varian, surprised and a little bit suspicious, asks how this stranger knows his name, and then who they are. The stranger simply says that they are someone who can help him. They introduce themselves as “One”, and request that Varian follow them to safety.

Varian, looking around him, decides that he’d rather just trust One than get stranded, so he follows them. They find a good place to stay for the night, and One asks if they can see Varian’s glove. Varian cauciously hands it over, and One looks it over before handing it back, then decides to explain the situation.

“Varian, have you ever heard of the multiverse theory?”

“Yeah, I read about it in Demanitus’ book. It talks a bit about how there could be infinite universes parallel to our own and each other, each event creating new universes based on the alternate versions of those events. Some universes also work entirely differently from others, or the flow of time is different, so there might be a universe where everyone is a chicken, or a universe where everyone that exists now is living 100 years in the future compared to us. But everything also moves at the same pace. It’s like a time paradox. Sorry, I’m rambling. Why are we talking about the multiverse theory?”

“Well, my young alchemist, what you have there is called a thread jumper. It allows you to jump between universes, and travel the multiverse.”

“Wait, so what you’re saying is, I’m in another universe?”

“Precisely.”

After a small panic attack, One explains that they know all about this kind of stuff, since they have a jumper too, and can help get Varian home. The only problem is, Varian’s jumper isn’t working. One says they know someone who might know how to help, and they walk to a strange hut. One barges into it without knocking, shouting “what’s up Science Bitch” as they entered.

Inside is a guy reading a book, who immediately puts it down to yell at One, shouting “I’M A WIZARD YOU-” before noticing Varian. They stare at each other for a long moment, due to the fact that they are both Varian.

So, introductions are made, short existential crisises are had, and Wizard!Varian sits down to look at OG!Varian’s (That’s what I’m calling our Varian) jumper.

Turns out, Varian’s jumper is a bit weird, and requires a day or two to recharge after a jump, so they have to wait a while for it to charge (it seems that Varian can only travel using his own jumper, and can’t just hold onto One or anything). They all groan at this, but decide to take advantage of this by getting to know each other a bit. Wizard!Varian and One already know each other very well, and have a history with the multiverse stuff, but they don’t want to talk about it much with OG!Varian. Instead, they tell him a tad bit more about how some of the stuff works, and ask about his world.

After a few hours of conversation, Wizard!Varian decides to observe the jumper a little more, and finds some more bad news. So, he doesn’t know why, but it doesn’t have settings, so they have no control over where OG!Varian might end up when he teleports. Uh oh. So they might have to do a slightly more old fashioned way; just keep teleporting until they get to the right world. OG!Varian will be able to tell when he’s in the right universe though, so it should be okay! Besides, they can probably find someone to help them fix it since Wizard!Varian can’t.

So, One vows to help get Varian home, and they soon (after it finishes charging) head off. The fic will start out slightly episodic, with a bit of a “universe of the week” type format. In each one, they will meet a different Varian (since this fic is centered around the different Varian AUs. Some crossovers may happen occasionally, but there will always be a Varian there). While they are in each universe, they may end up helping the Varian there in some way or another, and later on in the story, one or two may end up joining the duo.

Eventually, the plot will pick up, and become something a bit bigger, with plenty of lore and character development for the Varians. I already have the bigger idea for the plot and most backstories already planned out in my head, but don’t want to give it away in case I starting making this proper.

Anyways, that’s my fic idea. I call it “Varian!AU” and nobody can make me change the title.

I’m probably gonna add more info and ideas in a reblogged version of this post, so look out for that on my blog!

Hope you guys think this is interesting! I’d like to hear some suggestions for AUs I could include (I already have a long list, but I want to see some other stuff people come up with)!

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years ago

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Taking a Break.

(Aug 24 to Sept 14/20)

So.

You may have guessed this was coming with my hinted responses to recent posts. I talked with a few Lovelies behind the scenes to help ease my fears about this decision. I’ve done a lot of reflective thinking for the past few weeks, and I’ve decided that when I have a three week break from work, I am also going to take advantage of that and take a three week break from here as well.

This is not something any of y’all did. Please do not think this. This is a “Steph hasn’t had time for herself since last summer” thing, a “Steph puts too much on her own shoulders because she doesn’t feel she deserves her own time” thing, a “Steph just needs a break” thing. And it’s been made even worse with C-19 because I’m NEVER off of the same computer nor couch. Before, I’d go to and from work, and blogging in the evenings was fun, because I didn’t do it during the day. Then on weekends, I’d answer asks and leave for the gym, spend a bit of my day running around, and come home, play again on Tumblr, and repeat.

Now, on work days, I literally wake up, spend 16 hours on my laptop, and then go to bed. Weekends, I FEEL obligated to be on Tumblr to help curate the community I love treasure so dearly, so ANOTHER day or so of my weekend is dedicated to making sure I have content for the following week to come, because HEY I can’t leave home anyway, MAY AS WELL.

My blog is nearly a full time job, one I volunteer my free time for (I have a Ko.fi, shameless segue). I spend about 30 hours a week answering asks, filing my posts, searching for stuff for people, collecting reblog threads and chains, and generally trying to keep a positive attitude because I know so many of y’all come here for safety, love, happiness, and escapism. And I do it ALL because I LOVE doing it. I love being a curator of fandom. I love having a blog that people know they can come and generally have a good time. I love all of my friends and lurkers and the people who help me make this blog an interactive one.

The problem is that with never leaving home, I am becoming emotionally drained, very depressed, and am slowly not enjoying doing this anymore. I DON’T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN. So after a lot of discussions with a few people and self reflection, I’ve decided I need Steph-Time™, and I need to FEEL like I’m not obligated to be here all the time, just like I needed time away from work. As I explained to my boss, I just need that time to not feel obligated to answer calls and Slack messages without feeling guilty about it. It’s different when I have a Work Computer and a Home Computer. My home computer is supposed to be Fun Stuff. Now it’s not, because work bothers me on my fun computer. He agreed, as did the Lovelies who I talked to behind the scenes.

I love you guys SO MUCH, and I love receiving the asks I get, but some days, a dozen asks daily becomes overwhelming and new fic lists and song recs become intimidating. I need a break. It’s taken me a lot to say that, because I am crying writing this because I feel so many people need me, and I genuinely don’t feel like I deserve a break ever, because there are people who come to me for comfort and need it more than I need a break.

But the ironic thing is that I can’t help anyone if I’m not taking care of myself. How fitting that my own advice to others comes back to slap me in the face, eh?

So, here’s what’s happening then, because I KNOW I can’t 100% stay away from here...

I am taking 3 weeks off from work starting August 24 until September 14. My “obligation break” from Tumblr will be during that time as well. I say “obligation” because Tumblr feels like I HAVE to do it. I don’t want that. I want to see what it’s like being you guys again, just taking in content, and coming on occasionally, post up shit photos of myself, LOL.

During said break, ALL ASKS AND SUBMISSIONS WILL BE TURNED OFF. I want to, IF I FEEL LIKE IT, take the time to answer some old asks. Essentially, I just want to do my blog because I feel like it, not because I NEED NEW CONTENT. Yeah, I think that’s what stresses me out, is because I’m TERRIFIED that y’all will leave me if I don’t keep producing new stuff, so I just.... never stop, and it’s draining me.

As an exception to the off-inbox rule, ASKS WILL BE TURNED ON ON AUGUST 27 ONLY. That is my birthday, and I know some people will want to send me well wishes. If you send me an un-related ask on that day, I probably won’t answer it unless it’s one of those ones I can answer quickly. But yeah, my birthday is on the 27, if anyone is interested in that sort of thing.

WEDNESDAY FIC LISTS WILL NOT BE PUBLISHED DURING THESE THREE WEEKS. Namely because I have exactly 4 lists ready to go, and I plan on using them for the this and the three subsequent Sundays.

Five Fics Friday is still on, as is Fic Rec Sunday. 5FF will probably be fave fics instead of new MFLs, so I’m sorry about that. The Sunday lists are already done and therefore not going to stress me out.

I’m not leaving completely. I’m still here, I just, like I said, need that obligation element removed from my brain. You guys have NO CLUE how guilty I feel every day when I have to choose one or another ask because of the quickness of one ask over another, or the fact that This Day was a Bad Day™ and I can’t answer advice asks in a bad headspace. I need that element removed to just the asks I’ve already got, and let myself answer them on my own time. Draft a slew of them to post when I return (I mean, y’all have been waiting months/years on some of my asks, what’s another three weeks, LOL), and head back with a clear head to better help you guys.

So LITERALLY, the only difference you guys will notice is the lack of NEW posts. My queue is full for the next MONTH, so literally you would not even know I was gone unless you tried to send me an ask or a DM.

Let’s be real here, guys, I’m not going to completely disconnect for 3 weeks. Y’all will be yelling at me to get off and go outside, LOL.

So what am I doing with my 3 weeks then? Updating my resumé, learn some new art skills, go for my Big Walks™ I haven’t been doing, play some video games, get my hair cut, maybe get my cat. Do and post up some of my art I’ve been meaning to finish. You know, stuff that not-losers do, LOL.

Anyway, unlike Mofftiss, please don’t give up on me after three (weeks) :D I just need a mental health check, is really all this is. I’m having a hard time disconnecting work from leisure and I need to do that again. <3

I will be back, I promise!! And hopefully better. <3

This is a very difficult decision for me, because I’ve been running this blog at full steam for about FIVE YEARS NON-STOP. All because I’m scared of hurting people. I hope you all understand.

I love you guys so much. <3

~Steph

#my blog #about me #steph takes a vacay #i'm just really drained you guys #i hope you understand #steph says 'obligated' a lot #long post

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spicycreativity · 3 years ago

Note

The Core Four (Logan, Roman, Virgil and Patton) are somewhere spooky, old house, in the woods, etc etc, and it's a place where poltergeist/demon/ghost/devil/spirit/whatever you want Remus resides and haunts and is scary and evil in. (Or they summon him) And he's like "Ooh time to mess with them muahahahaha!" but he sees Patton and gets like this "Cute boy!" And gets interested in Patton instead.

Boop

Words: 2k

Pairing: Pre-slash Intruality

Other notes: College AU, mild Vitaminwater slander, somewhat based on my own college experience of being straight edge and bored all the time and also owning multiple fist-sized chunks of quartz crystal purchased from the tent outside the gas station down by the on-ramp on the far side of town 🥴 Our abandoned dorm building was not haunted, tho

Content warnings: Mentions of underage drinking (not depicted), mentions of overdosing (non-graphic), Remus is sexually forward toward Patton, swearing, innuendo, etc. Still, I'd only rate this T

While it was rooming assignments that brought Roman, Patton, Logan, and Virgil together during the first weeks at university, it was their mutual unwillingness to break any sort of rule that kept them together. While their peers were drinking smuggled alcohol and racking up write-ups from the RAs, the foursome would sit on Logan and Virgil's side of the dorm suite drinking Vitaminwater and attempting to entertain themselves with board games and Netflix. This, predictably, got old quickly and weekends soon became a desperate battle to stave off boredom and existential ennui.

The fraying thread of Roman's patience finally snapped the night Patton suggested Pogs. The lack of adventure had chafed at him longer than it had the others and he secretly longed for some sort of thrill, even if it meant breaking the rules.

"Ugh," Roman threw himself backwards onto the pillow he'd stolen from Logan's bed, nearly knocking over Patton's mostly-full bottle of grape Vitaminwater. "We're seriously so lame that we can't think of anything better to do than Pogs?"

"Hey," said Virgil from atop his bed, and shook a few drops of açai-blueberry-pomegranate sugar water onto Roman's forehead.

"Sorry, Patton," Roman added, wrinkling his nose at the unpleasant sensation. "No offense, but I'm just so bored! I was expecting more adventure when I finally left my dreary old hometown."

"I thought you told us you were from Los Angeles," Logan said, tossing a package of Wet Wipes down onto Roman's chest. "And Virgil, I understand why you would want to teach Roman a lesson, but please try not to stain my pillowcase."

"What do you wanna do, Roman?" Patton asked, adjusting himself where he was propped up against one of the legs of Logan's bed.

"I don't know! All I know is that I have the most boring Snap story out of everyone in my stupid 100-level History class. Remy went surfing the other day. And he's from Nebraska! How does he know how to surf?"

"There it is," Virgil said.

Roman sat up again and opened up the Wet Wipes so he could clean off his face. "Lightning round! Suggestions. Go!" He pointed at Virgil.

"Um," said Virgil. "Uh-- Sca-- Uh, horror marathon. Horror movie marathon."

"Ugh, no." Roman pointed at Logan.

"Studying."

"Oh, come on. Patton?"

"We all go to bed early so we can wake up and get breakfast together before the dining hall runs out of waffle batter?"

"Guuuys." Roman pointed at Virgil again.

"Man, I dunno, Roman! Like I'm the expert in what looks good on a Snapchat story."

"You're the one who's bored," Logan added. "Why don't you suggest something?"

"That's not how it works!" Roman shot back. "I'm the-- the arbiter, the czar! You're the idea guys."

"Okay, fine!" Virgil leaned over the edge of the bed to better give Roman the evil eye. "How about we break into the shut-down dorms with a ouija board and try to contact the spirit of that kid who OD'ed in the bathroom?"

"That's the spirit," Roman said.

"Ha," Patton said weakly.

"Wait," said Virgil, already desperately trying to make eye contact with Logan. "I was kidding. You can't be serious."

"No, no, that's a great idea! Virgil, go get your ouija board and whatever other spooky shit you have tucked away.

"We're going now?" Patton squeaked.

Logan sighed and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "Roman, anything you post to your Snapchat story can potentially be turned in as evidence and used to incriminate you. I suggest you leave your phone behind."

"Wait!" Virgil ran his hands through his hair, agitated. "You can't possibly be on board with this."

"I'm not," said Logan. "I am offering Roman advice for the same reason high school nurses' offices offer condoms: not as an encouragement, but as a safety measure. Either we all agree to go now or we all agree to go tomorrow night after Roman spends the whole day pouting and whining--"

"Hey!"

"So I suggest we just get it over with," Logan concluded.

"Seriously?" Patton was already pale and shaking, holding a stray hoodie of Virgil's close to his chest.

"It's okay, Patton," Virgil said, offering him a reassuring smile. "I'll let you wear my horn of protection amulet."

It took just under an hour to get everyone changed into darker clothes and outfitted with protective symbols from Virgil's collection. In addition to silver amulets and charms, he had handed out fist-sized chunks of quartz crystal to all of them with careful instructions not to lose them, as he wanted everything back at the end of the night.

But soon (all too soon for Patton) they faced the looming silhouette of the abandoned Monroe Hall. It was in surprisingly good repair despite the lack of security cameras and floodlights to deter intruders. In fact, the only light came from the blue emergency callbox situated a few yards down the path.

"We, genius," Virgil said, turning to Roman. "How do we get in?"

"I don't know!" Roman tossed up his hands. "I'd Google how to pick a lock but somebody" --he glared at Logan-- "made us leave our phones in the microwave."

"I already told you, it's a functional Faraday cage and--"

"Yeah, yeah, how about we save the science lectures for 8:00 am on Tuesdays and Thursday," Roman said.

"That was oddly specific," Virgil muttered, trying and failing to exchange a glance with Patton, who was staring at the ground and turning over the quartz crystal in his hands. "Wait, I've got an idea." He took his own chunk of quartz out of his pocket and slammed it through the glass door, sending a shower of tempered glass clattering onto the tiled floor inside. Then he stepped through the hole and beckoned the others in after him. "Let's go."

Patton made a muffled sound of fear and grabbed onto Logan's arm. "You don't really think there's a ghost, do you?"

"Of course not," Logan said, leading Patton inside and following Virgil to the stairs.

"Wait!" Roman jogged ahead to lead the charge. "Are we not gonna talk about Virgil just--"

"Found a broken door and stepped through it?" Virgil interrupted, bumping Roman with his hip. "No, we are not."

Roman led them up a flight of stairs and down a corridor similar to the one in their own dorm building. All the doors they tried were locked, so they set up the ouija board in the hallway outside the bathrooms.

"Okay, gang," Virgil said once they were all sequestered around the board. "Pointer fingers on the planchette."

"Not our whole hands?" Roman asked.

Virgil shot him a sideways glare. "I'm sorry, are you the expert on the occult?"

"Are you?" Roman asked.

"Relative expert," Virgil said, sticking out his tongue. "Now. Pointer fingers on the planchette."

"I really don't know if this is a good idea," Patton said, extending a shaking hand.

"You should be more afraid of campus security," Logan said. "Although from the state of the building, it appears that we are the first to successfully enter."

"Nothing's happening," Roman complained, his eyes on the planchette.

"We haven't asked a question yet, genius," Virgil sneered.

"It seems rude to barge into someone's house and just start asking questions," Patton said. He looked up, addressing the ghost. "Hi!"

The planchette jerked and began to shake. Anticipating Virgil's accusation, Roman held up his other hand. "It's not me!"

"Shut up!" Virgil snapped. "It's moving."

They read the letters out loud together as the planchette began to move around the board: "N-I-C-E." Pause. "C-O-C-K."

"Oh, come on." Virgil grabbed the planchette and threw it at Roman's face. "Not funny."

"I swear that wasn't me!" Roman said, smacking the planchette down. It clattered across the board and came to a stop by the number '2.'

"Roman," Patton chided, "it's really not nice to mess with us like that."

"You too?' Roman said. He turned to Logan. "Come on, Specs, you know it wasn't me."

"I know it wasn't a ghost. I know it wasn't me. I know Patton and Virgil aren't likely to make that sort of joke. Therefore, I can safely posit that it must have been you. Although I wouldn't make an accusation without more evidence."

"Oh, come on!" Roman put his hand on the planchette despite Virgil's noise of protest. "Hey, spirit. Can you do something else spooky so my friends stop accusing me of--"

What happened next was equal parts anticlimactic and chilling: Roman's eyes turned green and began to emit a gentle glow. He was silent for only a moment before turning to Patton with a chipper smile. "Hey, hot stuff! Nice cock."

"Whoa" said Virgil, scrambling backwards toward the wall. "What the fuck."

"He invited me in!" said Roman, or more accurately, the ghost possessing Roman's body.

"Oh my God," Patton said. "That's not Roman."

"Yeah, no shit!"

"I'll give him back in a minute," said the spirit. "I just had to shoot my shot with hottie over here. What's your name, sugar?"

"Uh," said Patton, glancing wildly at Virgil (who was fumbling in his pocket for his holy water or his salt, whatever he found first) and Logan (who was actively blue-screening). "Patton?"

"Nice to meet you, Patton." The ghost stuck Roman's hand out for a shake. "Name's Remus. Has anyone ever told you you're kinda DILF-y for a college student?"

"N-no?"

"Well, you are."

"Thanks, I guess." Patton sat back and pulled his legs up to his chest in an unmistakably defensive pose. "Um, is there something that you wanted, Remus?"

"I already told you!" Roman's face beamed in a way it never had before, his eyes twitching strangely in their sockets. "I just popped in to shoot my shot. So?"

"He's propositioning you," Logan hissed.

"I…" said Patton, panic whiting out his mind. Unable to find words, he held up his left hand to show off the silver band on his ring finger.

"You're married?" Roman's body leaned forward to read the engraved writing. "True love waits."

"It's a purity ring," Virgil explained, finally extricating a small vial from the tangle of cords and chains in his pocket. "And this is holy water."

"Wait," said Remus, "are you guys exorcising me? Cause I swear I'm gonna give you your friend back. I'm dead, not evil. Also," he turned to Patton, "is that a no?"

"Yes!"

"Wait, so you do wanna bang?"

"No!"

"Alright, alright, damn." Remus leaned Roman's body back, putting up his hands in a defensive gesture. "You know, I was gonna go full poltergeist and try to see if I could make you all cry, but I changed my mind when I saw Hot Pat-tato. Soooo, you're welcome."

"Yeah," said Virgil, "I'm not sure we should be thanking you for taking over our friend's body. Give him back, by the way."

"Wait!" said Patton. "Remus, why aren't you at rest? Is there something we can do to help you move on?"

"Nah," said Remus. "To be honest, I just wanted to haunt the crap out of some dumb college kids."

"Need I point out," Logan said, "that you are also a dumb college kid?"

Virgil looked around at the empty halls, walls of closed doors, the dusty spiderwebs hanging like streamers in the corners. "Wait. There's nobody to haunt."

"Yeah," said Remus. Roman's shoulders shrugged. "It's been kinda lonely and boring.

"Sucks to suck," Virgil said, brandishing the sealed vial of holy water. "Okay, time to go."

Remus sighed and crossed Roman's arms over his chest. "Fine. I didn't really want to haunt you guys anyway."

"I might…" Patton twisted up his mouth thoughtfully, rubbing his fingers along the quartz crystal in his pocket. "Maybe I'll come back and say hello sometime."

The grin that unfurled across Roman's face was so familiar that Patton nearly hugged him. But his eyes were still that slightly luminescent green, still twitching and rolling like he was trying to take in every detail of the world all at once. "Really?"

Patton nodded and held out his hand palm-up. Roman's hand was icy, but Patton forced himself not to flinch as he brought his head down and kissed Remus' knuckles. "Really."

For a moment, there was silence. Then came a gentle warmth, and confused brown eyes staring down at Patton, who only had time to gasp before Roman tilted his head in confusion. "Um, Patton? Why are you holding my hand?"

#you are contractually obligated to point out any formatting errors or typos #sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #intruality #college au #spicywrites #patton sanders #remus sanders #anyway i am forever entertained by the idea of ONLY projecting my idiosyncrasies onto the characters and none of my psychological trauma #hence the overshare about college #you can know every exact details of what i did from ages 18-21 but i will never ever tell you how my parents fucked me up #no bummers! funny shit only!

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unforth · 4 years ago

Text

May Trope Mayhem Fill Day 1: Friends to Lovers

Fandom: Tian Guan Ci Fu/Heaven Official’s Blessing

Ship: Xie Lian/Hua Cheng

Rating: Gen

Tags: modern au, tooth-rotting fluff, 520 day, florist Xie Lian

Word count: 2,492

Cross-posted to AO3

@duckprintspress

The bell over the door rang and Xie Lian turned from the bouquet he was arranging, forcing his expression into a tired smile as he prepared to greet yet another customer. 520 was an auspicious day for love, and a great day for Xie Lian’s shop, but it was exhausting. His smile widened and became more genuine, though, when he saw his customer: Hua Cheng, one of the few regulars that Xie Lian knew well enough to consider a friend.

Not that they’d ever met any place outside of “Buds to Blooms.”

Not that they’d ever spent much time together.

Not that they talked about anything other than flowers, at least not most of the time.

Not that they had really any relationship at all, no matter how much Xie Lian might want one.

Hua Cheng looked especially dapper for the holiday, tall, slim form clothed in black slacks, a red button up shirt, and a black suit jacket. Silver jewelry adorned his neck, an intricate filigree in the shape of butterfly nestled between the open buttons of the top of his shirt. His fingers were beringed, one looped with a red string that seemed oddly familiar, and sparkling chains were threaded through his long hair. Tiny chimes sounded every time he moved his head. As if his attire wasn’t enough to demonstrate that he had a date for the evening, his eye patch, usually plain, today was decorated with a red felt heart that Xie Lian suspected had been sewn on by hand.

He was gorgeous.

(read more!)

Something unpleasantly like jealousy curdled in Xie Lian’s stomach. If only he were the one that Hua Cheng got dressed up for...if only he were the one Hua Cheng wanted...if only--

“Xie Lian?” Hua Cheng asked.

Blinking, Xie Lian flushed. He’d been staring, a white rose stem still clutched in one hand, his trimmers in the other. With a shake of his head, he shoved the blossom into the arrangement he’d been working on, set the clippers down, and wiped his hands on his apron as he stepped out from behind the counter.

“Good evening, Hua Cheng,” he said brightly. Being jealous of the man, woman, or genderqueer individual privileged to spend the evening with Hua Cheng was absurd. “You’ve got perfect timing, I was just about to close up for the night.” Xie Lian was under no delusions of what his actual relationship with Hua Cheng was - customer and businessman, with a splash of friendship. “Indeed...I’d probably be closed already, except I wanted to get a head start on tomorrow.”

“I know,” said Hua Cheng with a toothy grin. “I got tired of waiting.” Confused, Xie Lian tilted his head to one side. Stopping in the middle of the open store floor, Hua Cheng turned a slow circle, eye searching the decimated shelves and coolers. “Wow, you musta been busy.” Xie Lian usually prided himself on the profusion and variety of flowers he kept in stock, but closing time on the busiest day of the year saw him nearly cleaned out.

“I’m exhausted,” Xie Lian confessed. With any normal customer, he’d never have admitted it - always have to be bright and perky and indefatigable for the clientele! - but Hua Cheng wasn’t a normal customer. “But 520 day alone pays my rent for most of the year, so it’s worth it.”

“I’m sure it is,” Hua Cheng murmured. “And I’m sure you need a break, so…” A decisive nod set of a cascade of beautiful music as Hua Cheng strode to one of the coolers and pulled it open. A few bedraggled bouquets and a single bucket full of stalks of cape jasmine were all that remained within. Every year, Xie Lian stocked up on the cape jasmine, tiny white blossoms nestled in profusion amidst evergreen leaves, and every year hardly anyone bought any. Xie Lian didn’t care. They were his favorite flower, and a small indulgence, and when no one bought them, he got to take them home and put them on his dining room table and imagine impossible things while he ate dinner for one on the most romantic night of the year.

Except apparently not this year, because Hua Cheng ignored the arrangements and grabbed the entire plastic vase of jasmine.

“How much for all of these?” Hua Cheng asked, hefting the container and letting the cooler door slide shut behind him.

Could he be any more perfect?

“Oh...uh…” Catching his lip between his teeth, Xie Lian looked at the flowers, looked at Hua Cheng, looked at the darkness outside his shop window, and sighed. “...just take them. You’re a loyal customer, and it’s not like I was going to sell them to anyone else tonight. They’ll be past selling by tomorrow, so…”

“No,” replied Hua Cheng firmly. Xie Lian frowned, confusion intensifying. “Name a price.”

“But--”

“Look. There’s this person. I’ve tried everything I can think of to let them know how I feel, and nothing has worked. And I have a suspicion or three about why they won’t listen, so tonight is the night. They’re worth it, and I need them to know they’re worth it, and so I’m paying, and then I’m taking these flowers to them, and then - unless I’m devastatingly wrong about their opinion of me - we’re spending the evening together, and I’m getting them dinner, and maybe giving them a foot massage. So. Tell me how much I owe you, Xie Lian.”

No, seriously - could he be any more perfect?

Yes, he could...if I was the person he was doing all those nice things for.

Xie Lian heaved a sigh. “250 yuan,” he said. Hua Cheng lifted a suspicious eyebrow. Yeah, Xie Lian might have low-balled that number a little...a lot… “...okay, more like 400.”

“Perfect,” Hua Cheng announced. Setting the container down at his feet, he reached into a pocket, withdrew a billfold, and deliberately counted out 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 100 renminbi bills.

“Hua Ch--”

“Zip it,” Hua Cheng said, setting the money down on the counter just behind Xie Lian. Because Xie Lian was still just standing there. With his hands at his sides. Staring. And feeling sorry for himself. “I’m taking the container too.”

“That still doesn’t cost--”

Oh, but he was so tired.

“This person is worth it.”

Xie Lian struggled to keep his exhale from leaving as a forlorn sigh; it whispered from him, leaving his shoulders slumped, his mind fogged, and his chest hollow. “Alright. Have a nice night, Hua Cheng.”

“I will.” There was an inexplicable intensity to Hua Cheng’s voice, but Xie Lian didn’t want to try to understand. What he already knew hurt enough, and he knew he was being absurd. Dwelling on it would only intensify his sadness. Hua Cheng lifted the bucket of jasmine again, hugged it close with apparent indifference to the damage it might do to his expensive suit, and walked to the door. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” said Xie Lian, his voice empty, his heart empty, his store empty, his life...he shook his head and followed Hua Cheng to the door. Given Hua Cheng’s burdens, Xie Lian hustled and stepped before him, opening the door so he could leave without even more difficulty. “Thanks as always for your business.”

“My business…” Hua Cheng echoed. “Is that what this is?”

Xie Lian had no idea what Hua Cheng meant.

Xie Lian refused to think about what Hua Cheng meant, as Hua Cheng stepped out of the store, and Xie Lian closed and locked the door behind him, and Xie Lian turned and stared at his barren shelves, cast in deep shadow in the low evening light.

Tomorrow, he’d be up bright and early to receive his shipments, make the day’s deliveries, run the business, do all the work of owning a florist shop himself.

Tomorrow, he’d be collected, and calm, and professional.

Today…

A single teardrop made a wet, cool line down his cheek.

...today, he was being ridiculous.

Shaking off his melancholy, Xie Lian set about shutting down. There were cases to refill, vases to wash, coolers to clean. There was work to do, so much work to do, and he lost himself in the rhythm of it, in the simple joy it brought him. Minutes passed, the evening stretching later. Outside, he could hear as celebrators walked by. There was so much joy and jollity in their voices, and brought him a sense of pride to reflect and think - he helped make the day better for many people. His flowers brought happiness to dozens, hundreds, of people.

It was enough.

His flowers brought happiness to Hua Cheng.

It was almost enough.

It was--

A knock-knock-knock startled Xie Lian as he carefully swept bits of leaf and petal into his palm after wiping the cooler interior. Tumbling to his bottom, scattering flower bits over his lap, he sat there blinking. It was probably just some doomed boyfriend or husband realizing they’d forgotten to buy their love a gift. It was probably...but he glanced toward the exterior door, and there was no one there.

Knock, knock, knock.

Uncertain, Xie Lian rose and walked toward the back of the store. The knocking grew louder the closer he drew to the receiving door, and finally, baffled, Xie Lian went to it and peered through the peekhole.

Hua Cheng stood outside, smile suave, arms embracing the container of cape jasmine branches.

Xie Lian hesitantly unlocked the door and pulled it open. “Apologies, was there something wrong with…?”

“Oh, never,” replied Hua Cheng brightly. “I just got tired of waiting. Again.”

“I don’t…um...?”

“I told you, I have someone very important I want to see tonight, and they deserve to know how much I value them.”

Hearing it again stung. Did Hua Cheng really have to rub in how special this person was to him? What did any of it have to do with Xie Lian? Why was Hua Cheng here, instead of with them? None of it made any sense, and Xie Lian didn’t want to think about it, except how could he not think, and wonder, and mourn, with Hua Cheng standing in front of him once more?

“I’m sorry...I don’t…”

Hua Cheng rolled his eye. “Unfortunately, he’s not always the most observant individual, but I forgive him for that. To tell you the truth,” Hua Cheng whispered, leaning forward conspiratorially, “I’d forgive him anything.”

Wait.

Was Hua Cheng implying…

Don’t think about it.

“Huh?” asked Xie Lian.

...but it almost sounds like...

With a hearty, gorgeous laugh that set flower bucket water sloshing to the ground, Hua Cheng threw his head back. “They’re for you, Xie Lian,” he managed between gales. “They’re your favorite, right?”

Oh.

Oh...oh, wow.

No...it couldn’t be.

“Huh?!”

Setting the container of flowers down beside the door, Hua Cheng withdrew one stalk, length heavily bowed with tiny white blossoms, and held it out for Xie Lian to take. Too tired, too bemused, too drunk on nascent hope to decline, Xie Lian took it.

“I couldn’t exactly ask you out while you were on the clock,” Hua Cheng explained. “For a long time, I thought I’d been so clear about my interest, and that surely you’d pick up on it and, if you were interested, respond in kind. But even though you flirted back, you never, ever did, and I started to wonder...I was pretty depressed about it for a while there…”

“...you stopped coming for a few months…” murmured Xie Lian.

“Yup, exactly - then. But I couldn’t stay away, and when I returned you were so happy to see me, and I couldn’t believe I’d misread your mutual interest so completely. And then it occurred to me...what if it wasn’t your interest I’d misread, but...you?”

“Me?”

“You’re so quiet.” Hua Cheng’s voice was fond, his expression gentle, and he reached out with a hand to cup Xie Lian’s chin. “You’re so kind.” The red string tied around Hua Cheng’s finger brushed Xie Lian’s cheek. “You’re so self-effacing.” The feel of it was familiar, and Xie Lian finally recognized it - it was one of his strings, from the store, the ones he used to tie bouquets. “You would never presume that I’d be more interested in you than in the flowers you sold.” Hua Cheng was wearing it like jewelry. “Not that I don’t love flowers - I do, truly.” That was so… “Almost as much as I love you.”

...so…

...wait, what?

“Hua Cheng,” Xie Lian breathed, heart in his throat, tears in his eyes.

“Will you go out with me tonight, A-Lian?” asked Hua Cheng, deep and rich and gloriously sincere.

Xie Lian opened his mouth, closed it, opened it, closed it, blinked away tears, and then smiled. “I guess it depends,” he said with a grin.

It was gratifying to see Hua Cheng look a fraction as confused as Xie Lian had felt most of the evening. “On what?”

“...did you mean what you said earlier?”

“Every word.”

“Even the part about the foot massage?”

“Especially the part about the foot massage!” said Hua Cheng. “When was the last time you sat down?”

“I don’t even remember,” Xie Lian admitted. “It’s been a long day.”

“I know, A-Lian.” Sliding a hand down Xie Lian’s neck, along his shoulder, and down his arm, Hua Cheng took Xie Lian’s hand in his own, clasped both their fingers around the jasmine stem, raised it to his lips, and gave it a gentle kiss. Jasmine petals rained down between them like spring rain. “So I hope you’ll forgive me for making it even longer.”

“Oh, Hua Cheng…” Joy bursting through his heart, Xie Lian allowed Hua Cheng to gently tug him out the back and pull the door closed behind them. “...A-Cheng…” The soothing scent of jasmine flowers filled the alley. “I’d forgive you anything.”

“Anything, anything?”

“Anything, anything,” Xie Lian confirmed. “Though--”

“Knew there’d be a catch.”

“--I’d appreciate if I could go home and change before dinner?”

“...that’s fair. Should I wait for you here?” asked Hua Cheng with a gesture to the narrow, dirty alley.

“Why don’t you walk me back?” Xie Lian suggested.

“Not nervous about inviting a strange man back to your place?” Hua Cheng teased.

“I think only a strange man would want to come back to my place…”

“As I suspected - you sell yourself far too short.”

“Then aren’t I lucky to have you to tell me your worth?”

I do have you, right? You really think…

“You are,” Hua Cheng replied, unhesitating and firm. “And I will.”

...you really do.

“Wow.”

I was right.

“You’re worth everything to me, A-Lian.”

He really is so perfect...

“And you, to me.”

...we’re really perfect.

And, hand-in-hand, in a cloud of cape jasmine blossoms and a choir of chimes, they walked toward Xie Lian’s apartment.

Together.

#may trope mayhem #unforth writes #tgcf #hualian #hua cheng #xie lian #tgcf fanfiction #what me know how to tag things #never

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sweet-barnes · 5 years ago

Text

Survivor - CEO!Bucky

Pairing: CEO!Bucky x reader

Word Count: 3.4K

Summary: Bucky’s cocky attitude gets him into a situation that he’s not happy with.

A/N: so this is for @kitkatd7 250 follower writing challenge! i really hope you enjoy this!

You heard his footsteps before you saw him, his work shoes tapping against the marble floor of your lavish home as he walked closer. As he rounded the corner, you came into view. The black jumpsuit you were wearing hugged you in all the right places, showing off your curves in a way that drove Bucky crazy. He had to contain himself from pinning you to the counter right then and there.

Your matching black blazer hung on the back of the stool, the one that Bucky had tailored for you with a floral lining inside. The lining is always the most important part, you remembered him saying to you as he slipped it onto your body. Now you wore it whenever you could, it was your favourite.

“How’s my best girl this morning?” Bucky’s hands slowly encircled your waist and he settled his chin on your shoulder. His cologne filled your nose and you couldn’t help but lean back into him. “I’m good, Barnes,” you responded, trying not to let him know just how much he affected you. Bucky placed a languid kiss on your neck, lingering there for a second before pulling away and making his way over to the coffee machine.

You composed yourself quickly. You looked over at him, taking in his perfection as he stood pouring his coffee. The grey, subtle tartan suit he was wearing with the matching waist coat sent your mind reeling over how good he looked, his broad shoulders and his thighs were defined perfectly by the pattern.

“Like what you see?” You didn’t realise he was looking at you and your eyes flickered up to meet his icy blue ones staring back at you, a glint of cockiness in them and a smirk plastered onto his face. “You wish, James,” you tried but it was no use, you’d already been caught.

“If you want me now doll, all you have to do is ask,” he sauntered over to you and rested his elbows on the breakfast bar opposite you. “Okay babe, keep it in your pants, you have work today,” you rolled your eyes but you couldn’t keep the heat rising to your face and the small giggle that left your mouth. As much as you loved the man in front of you, sometimes you wished it was easier to hide the effect he had on you.

“Aw, she’s blushing, she must really want it,” he kept teasing, his grin spreading. You huffed, looking down at your nearly empty bowl of cereal. “I can make you feel better, if that’s what you need?” Bucky’s voice was soft but you knew he was still messing with you.

You looked up at him, putting on a sickly sweet smile. “I can make myself feel better, thank you very much.” You hopped down from the stool and made your way around to the sink, rinsing out your bowl and placing it on the drying rack.

You felt the familiar strong arms make their way around your waist again, with Bucky’s large frame pressing up against your back. “I love you,” he whispered and tingles shot down your spine at the words. You repeated the words back to him before turning in his arms, snaking yours around his neck and leaning in for a kiss.

“You need to get to work hun,” Bucky said before your lips could touch. You eyebrows furrowed, “no I don’t, it’s my day off,” you were searching his eyes to see if he was playing with you but you couldn’t find any hint of it.

“You agreed to some overtime the other day but you didn’t write it down, I wrote it in my diary for you because I knew you would forget,” he chuckled a little as he placed a kiss on your forehead. “I’ll take you in.”

Before you knew it, Bucky was gathering your blazer and your work bag from near the door, handing them over to you. “Are you sure? I definitely would have written it down,” you still weren’t completely believing Bucky.

You were always so organised with work, especially working in Bucky’s office. You just tried to make life easier for yourself as you contended with the jealous girls that worked there (everyone knew about your relationship and it hadn’t gone down well with the girls who always flirted with him).

“I’m sure, trust me, I am your boss after all,” Bucky grabbed his car keys and turned back to you, already knowing he was in trouble by the look on your face.

“What?” He blinked, not knowing what he had done wrong. “You don’t have to bring that up every time you know, it’s not an excuse for everything.” Bucky was now clicking on to what you were talking about. He would always joke about being your boss, and you would always respond the same way, with an eye roll and scoff, followed by that shy smile that he loved.

Ever since the day you met there was constant banter and sarcasm between the two of you. Both of you flashing your cocky attitude at each other at every opportunity and nothing had changed in the year and a half you had been together. Bucky adored that you were just as headstrong as him, he loved that you always had a comeback to whatever he said and that you never took him too seriously whenever he would throw one of his comments your way. He didn’t think it would be any different this time.

“I know,” he chuckled, smirking at you again, “it’s just,” he paused. “Would you even be able to survive without me?” You felt your jaw set into place at his words, not wanting to flip instantly at what he said. When you didn’t reply, he carried on, only making the situation worse for himself.

“Just like, you have your job because of me, which means those pay rises you always get are my doing, you’re always forgetting things, you’d be overly stressed if it wasn’t for me making sure you’re doing good all of the time, the list goes on Y/N.” You heard the smile in his voice but you couldn’t see passed his words.

At this point you could feel your blood boiling, “so you think I’m nothing without you?” You challenged, your eyes narrowing at Bucky. He didn’t catch onto the seriousness in your voice however, only chuckling and leaning against the counter with his arm. “Yeah babe, I make you 100 times better, through and through.”

That was the last thread broken. You sucked your tongue against your teeth before nodding, walking straight to the door, picking your own car keys out of the bowl in the hallway.

“Where are you going?” You heard Bucky’s call after you. You rolled your eyes, walking out of the door and nearly slamming it in his face but he was too quick and caught it as it came flying towards him. “Woah babe, what’s gotten into you?”

As you reached your car you whirled around to face him, making him stop abruptly in front of you. “I’m going to show you that I don’t need you, seen as though you think my life is completely dependent on you.”

It was now that Bucky saw the tears brimming your eyes. You were always so strong, always so put together and level-headed, it was very rare that he saw you crying. He knew however, that when you did cry, it was very serious.

“No no no, I didn’t mean it, I promise,” he tried to redeem himself but you were already climbing into your car, throwing your bag and blazer onto the passenger seat. You managed to close the door despite his attempts to keep it open with your last words lingering as you sped out of the driveway. “Too late, Barnes.”

When Bucky arrived at work that day he made his way straight to your office. It was on the floor below his, his office took up the whole of the top floor, but you were no where to be seen. He looked in the common room, around on the other floors and still came up with nothing. Eventually he resulted in asking at the front desk.

“She asked to take her holidays for this week, she said she’d call in when she’d be coming back and that you’d already authorised it,” the young girl explained to Bucky. He simply nodded before retreating back up to his office. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, lingering on your contact for a moment.

He knew sometimes he could be a bit too cocky but he never thought you’d react like this. You’d never had a problem with anything he’d said before and he knew you’d make sure he never over-stepped his mark. But clearly he’d crossed some invisible line that he didn’t know existed.

It rang a few times before you picked up, much to Bucky’s surprise. “What do you want, Barnes?” He could sense the edge to your voice as you spoke, there wasn’t the usual softness that he enjoyed hearing whenever he called you throughout the day. “Why have you taken your holidays at work? I never authorised that,” he heard you huff down the line.

“I’m showing you that I can do this without you, I already said this, now please leave me to it.” The line went dead as you hung up on him, and Bucky sighed as he threw his phone on the desk. He knew he messed up big time.

“I can’t believe he said that, I knew he could be an idiot sometimes but I didn’t think he was that bad!” Natasha exclaimed as she led you into the back of her bar. It was still closed and no one else was in yet apart from her so it was the perfect place to rant to your best friend.

“He tried to say he was just joking but he must have meant some of it, he listed off a load of things so he’s clearly thought about it before,” you dropped yourself down into the large leather chair in Natasha’s office. “I’m not being that kind of girl.”

Natasha hummed in agreement, “I guess you could try talking to him? I know he’d be willing to listen to what you have to say.” You knew Natasha was making perfect sense and was being very logical about the whole situation but you weren’t in the mood for logical and practical. You needed to do something to physically prove you didn’t need Bucky.

He needed to see you being able to look after yourself and not relying on him as he seemed to think you did. “I’ll talk to him after he’s seen it,” with that, you shuffled yourself further down into the seat with Natasha shaking her head at you slightly.

The good thing about having a best friend who worked in a bar was that you got free drinks. Another perk was that you could get a job whenever you needed and that was exactly what you were going to do. Of course, it wasn’t official, but as long as Bucky could see you working somewhere that wasn’t owned by him, he would hopefully get the message.

It was tradition for Bucky to have a couple of drinks every Friday night in Nat’s bar with you, so you were hoping he’d still come despite your little falling out.

You’d managed to go shopping and grab some clothes that fit your new ‘job’ and finished getting ready in the back before your shift started. It was well into the evening now and Bucky had left a few missed calls. He eventually left a message saying he’d be at your table if you’d like to join him. You were glad you knew him like the back of your hand otherwise this idea of yours wouldn’t have worked out very well. He’d finally get to see you being your own person.

Bucky was still in his grey suit when you spotted him in the booth in the corner. The low lights hit his skin perfectly and you couldn’t help the lingering look you sent his way as you were cleaning the bar.

“Are you going to go talk to him or just stare at him for the rest of the night?” Natasha’s voice behind you made you jump and you turned to face her. “I’ll go serve him, not talk to him,” you corrected, before pouring his preferred drink that you had committed to memory and slowly making your way over to him.

He didn’t even look up at you as you placed the drink in front of him. It was only when you sarcastically said “you’re welcome,” did his head shoot up to meet your gaze.

“Y/N?” His voice was breathy and you noticed the way his eyes moved across your body and the confusion settling into his features at your unusual attire. “What are you doing? Why are you wearing an apron?” He began rising up to stand in front of you.

You felt yourself being pulled towards him. Seeing him now was making you forget why you left in the first place. “I’m proving that I can provide for myself, that there’s more to me than you,” you were thankful that your voice stayed steady as you spoke but you didn’t think you could keep it up much longer with the way Bucky was looking at you.

“Babe, I didn’t mean any of those things that I said this morning, you don’t need to prove yourself to me,” he reached out towards you but decided against it before he made contact with your skin. He hands felt helpless by his sides but he had no idea what to do right now.

He had felt lost without you all day and now that he had you in front of him, it was like all of his words had left his head completely.

“I’m also proving myself to myself, James, there must have been some truth in what you said otherwise the words wouldn’t have been in your mind,” you took a deep breath before continuing. “I won’t be home for the next week, I’m doing this for me.”

Before you could see the look on his face, you walked away and back behind the bar. Bucky was still lingering in the same place as you stood next to Natasha. His face lost as he looked around at everyone else.

“Was that the right thing to do?” You were suddenly questioning yourself and you didn’t know what to think anymore. You were so strong about your decision before but after seeing Bucky you didn’t know if it was the right one.

“Hun, he needs to learn that you are your own person, like you said before, he can’t go around saying that stuff about you and not expect any consequences and he’s been saying it far too long to not have any, in my opinion,” you looked over at her and she just shrugged. “Look, I can change my mind okay, don’t look at me like that.”

You simply laughed at her, before you were being called over by a customer. You glanced over at Bucky’s table and noticed the seat was empty where he had been. It was going to be a long week.

Bucky never thought he would feel so alone in his own home. Sleeping in the king sized bed without you next to him was the worst thing he’d experienced. He’d reached out so many times in the night to feel the warmth and comfort of your body but all he came into contact with was more sheets.

He’d given up eating proper meals by day 2, not only did he not have the appetite, but cooking for one just wasn’t as fun as cooking for the love of his life. He so desperately wanted to call you, to work it all out and convince you to come home but he stopped himself.

He knew you were doing this for yourself and not just for him. He owed you that at the very least. You deserved to find your place in this world without him. The amount of times the conversation that had caused all of this played over in his head was impossible to count. Bucky had ran through so many different scenarios of how that could have ended and none of them ended up with you leaving like this.

The only thing that kept him going was the fact that you had said you’d be gone for a week. It had been exactly a week since you said you needed to do this and Bucky had been counting down the days until your return, not that he would like to admit it.

He was laid on the unmade bed when he heard the front door open from downstairs. He waited a second before hearing your familiar footsteps making their way up the stairs.

Bucky was sat on the edge of the bed closest to the door when you entered, a sports bag full of stuff on one of your arms and the blazer that Bucky had gifted you on your other. The sight of you was enough to make Bucky instantly feel at home and the smile you sent him as you saw him let him know that everything was alright.

“So,” his voice was quite as you set your bag on the floor. “How was your week away from home, survivor?” You could tell he was nervous by the way he was wringing his hands together but you giggled at his choice of words.

“I survived without you, if that’s what you’re asking,” you joked, making your way over to stand in front of him but a sadness settled into his eyes at your comment. He took a breath before attempting to speak but you cut him off before he could.

“I know you’re going to apologise, and I don’t want you to, I know how you feel about the situation but I’m glad it happened,” Bucky frowned. “You are?” You nodded, giggling again before taking a seat next to him and reaching out for his hand. He quickly filled yours with his and squeezed a little at the familiar contact. He’d missed the feeling of your skin.

“I think we needed that, I now realise that I don’t need you as much as I thought I did, and as much as you thought I did, and I don’t mean that in a way that I want to get rid of you, I mean it in a way where we can grow from this experience,” Bucky just searched your face while you spoke.

“I don’t need you but I want you, you know I’ll always want you Bucky, I just want to be more independent,” he was nodding his head now, he was pretty sure he understood where you were coming from.

“So what does this mean for us? You still want to be with me?” You thought you’d made it clear for him but the week alone hadn’t done his thoughts any good. “Of course I do, Buck, I love you.”

You leaned forward, placing a small kiss on the corner of his mouth which he quickly reciprocated. “I just want to do more things for myself, I love doing them with you but there’s some things we need to do for ourselves.”

“I agree, I was doing some thinking too, after seeing you working in the bar with Nat, I was wondering if you wanted a bit of a change in your job, nothing major, just you’d be in charge of a department?” The smile on your face grew at Bucky’s words. He knew you’d been going after a different job within his company for a while now but there was never a fully open position. Luckily, someone had just left on your week off and Bucky thought it was the perfect opportunity for you to be more independent within your work.

“That would be amazing, Buck!” You all but squealed before enveloping him in your arms. “It’s not too much that I got you your job though is it?” Bucky tried to joke but you knew he was being serious. “Not at all, babe,” you pulled back. “I really appreciate it.”

A moment was shared between the two of you and you didn’t know whether it was because you had spent a week apart or because you just loved each other that much but you felt the connection between the two of you grow stronger, and you never wanted to leave him again.

#kits250challenge #ceo!bucky #ceo au #ceo!bucky x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you #james buchanan barnes

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threeletterslife · 4 years ago

Text

Brevity (But Most Often Not)

→ [2/7] of the Glossary Series

→ summary: All your life, you've been with guys who didn't bother to read the news or appreciate the art form of journalism. But Hoseok... Even the way he carefully chooses his words is a sign that you and he are a match. If only he weren't in a dilapidating psychiatric hospital. Then maybe you'd have a proper boyfriend who treated you right for once.

→ pairing/rating: hoseok x reader | PG-13

→ genre: 100% angst (but like, soft angst?? mellow angst?) | journalist!au

→ warnings: depictions of a psychiatric hospital and mentally ill patients, slight manipulation

→ wordcount: 6.6k

→ a/n: based on this ted talk! *disclaimer,,, the characters in this fic are fictional and do not correlate with the real members whatsoever!*

Merrymoor Hospital stands before you behind the gray clouds of fog that have drifted mysteriously and rather suddenly following your rather nervous departure from your car. Almost as if you've walked straight into a horror movie and Merrymoor Hospital was the haunted castle that would end up dragging you down to your demise.

You swallow.

The foggy weather isn't helping your anxious nerves. The weeds are overgrown in the dirt and a collapsed sign catches your eye. It reads Merrymoor Asylum for the Criminally Insane. That used to be the name for Merrymoor Hospital before they changed it to something a bit more... civil.

No wonder they're trying to close this place down. The whole building looks like a brewery for disaster—or murder if you will.

They should've sent Namjoon up for this job instead of you. The man has thick skin and probably hasn't watched a horror movie in his life, which would probably make him immune to the fear of entering a hospital that screams haunted mansion.

Though your hands are clammy, you make sure to take quick notes in your notebook about the surroundings.

Inhospitable hospital, you write. Might have something to do with weather. Possible revisit.

But you hope it doesn't have to come to that.

You're this jittery for your first visit; you don't want to think of the possibility of a second.

All you can do is hope the first visit at Merrymoor Hospital is so horrible that you can convey the exact picture of it in your writing and get it published. Then the place will shut down.

For nearly six years, citizens have been wanting to shut down Merrymoor because just the thought of these criminally insane people escaping the confines of the asylum terrifies them. And now your agency is taking action. If you write an article convincing enough (about your horrible findings) then Merrymoor will finally be shut down.

Of course, there is a slight chance that Merrymoor isn't as bad as everyone assumes it is. You'll have to report the facts as they are. If there's one thing you hate more than horror movies, it's yellow journalism. You promised yourself that when you became a journalist, you'd write everything as it is without exaggeration and overly pretentious language that the common man wouldn't be able to comprehend without pulling out a dictionary.

So here you are. At Merrymoor.

In a way, the place looks a bit like a college campus. If the campus had been severely mauled by zombies in a post-apocalyptic world, though. Cautiously, you step closer to the entrance of the building. There are guards there—unusually large and buff.

You clear your throat. "Hello." Your voice comes out squeaky and if your body language didn't give away how terrified you are, your voice sure did. "I'm Y/N. I believe I was invited to inspect Merrymoor Hospital today."

"Y/N..." a guard mutters gruffly.

You fight the urge to shrink back.

"Oh, Y/N L/N. The journalist? Yes, they're waiting for you."

Oh, thank goodness.

The guards nod at you before opening the heavy-looking doors.

"Thank you," you manage to squeak out before slipping into the entrance. What waits for you are bright white walls on all four sides of the hallway. There's a bit of dust in the corners and what you hope are water stains on the welcome mat you're stepping on. But otherwise, the conditions inside are far better than the outside.

"Y/N!!"

Your head jerks up when you hear your name.

"Hello!" A man dashes toward you, wearing a white lab coat and flashing his white teeth in your direction. He looks a bit too friendly to be working in such a serious place. "Y/N, right? Sorry I couldn't meet you outside. We were making sure your visit here would run as smoothly as possible." He grins at you again and you're starting to think he's doing that to hypnotize you into liking the hospital.

"Yes, I'm Y/N," you say. "Nice to meet you, Mr..." Your eyes trail down to glance at the name embroidered with gold thread on his coat, "Park."

"Oh, please, call me Jimin," the man smiles again. You have to admit if he wasn't stuck working here, he could've appeared in some magazines and gotten rich. "Welcome to Merrymoor, by the way. We're a psychiatric hospital established in 1863. Pretty old, aren't we?" He laughs but you don't.

Est. 1863, you scribble in your notebook. "Sorry if I don't respond sometimes," you mutter apologetically. "But I'd love it if you can tell me everything about Merrymoor."

"The more information, the better article you can write!" Jimin answers merrily.

Oh god. It sounds like Jimin's adamant about keeping the hospital open.

He drones on and on about Merrymoor's impossibly high specs and their success in helping their patients reach a peak in their lives. You scribble the facts down but don't include Jimin's biased side comments about the wonders of the asylum.

"Want to meet the patients?"

Jimin's sudden question startles you especially because you hadn't expected to actually come in contact with them.

"A-Assuming they're..."

"They won't hurt you," Jimin says, shaking his head. "Just don't bump into Gladys. She tends to get fussy when that happens. And don't mention the color blue in front of Jungkook. He doesn't like that. Steer clear away from anyone who looks like they're living in their own world. Some of them think they can get away with homicide in their minds. If someone approaches you and you feel nervous, call for me, okay?"

"Don't bump in Gladys. Don't say blue in front of Jungkook. Steer clear from people living in their own little bubble. Call you when I'm nervous. Got it," you say. "Thank you."

"No problem," Jimin salutes you.

Hm. He's cute.

You'd think the wellness center where all the patients are located for the evening would be behind one or two gates at the maximum. Instead, you and Jimin pass through six gates with even more buff guards.

Not bad, you think. Good security, you write in your notebook. Jimin glances over your shoulder and smiles proudly.

"You ready?" Jimin whispers to you before the guards open the seventh gate. "There are red panic buttons on the side if there's an emergency. But that's pretty rare." He shrugs.

"Yeah," you say. "You can open the door."

The moment the gates open, a rather large room is revealed. It sort of looks like a hotel lobby but with softer, pastel colors that are universally accepted as calming hues. The only bright color that stands out is the reds of the panic buttons scattered across the pale green walls.

"The rooms used to be pastel blue," Jimin says. "But after Jungkook came to us, we had to repaint them. He thinks the color is a curse."

"O-Oh..."

The patients are lazily lounging around the old armchairs or rocking on the balls of their feet in front of walls. Some are talking to themselves. Others are entranced in a kid's television show playing on the cracked television screen.

"It's been a long time since we've gotten donations," Jimin explains almost apologetically. "There are games in the closet over there," he says, pointing at the closet that is locked shut. "We lock that for safety reasons. But not a lot of them want to play checkers and battleship anyway."

There doesn't seem to be a set uniform for the patients. You see comfortable clothes on most of them. Sweatpants with mysterious stains and t-shirts with worn-out holes. All of them have a battered name tag pasted on their shirts.

Inadequate funding, you note. Jimin's smile crumbles a bit.

"Are they always this... turtle-like?" You stop yourself from saying slow.

"Well... They're... medicated," Jimin whispers as if it's the most important secret in the world.

That makes a lot more sense as to why some older patients are drooling on themselves. A lot of them seem to be drifting along like ghosts in some sort of vivid slumber. It's unsettling.

"Ah... I see," you answer. "May I talk to a few of the patients?"

"Yeah! Sure," Jimin says. "I'll get out of your hair. Call me if you need me."

"Thanks."

In general, the patients seem content, but you're not very sure if it's the drugs that are talking. They hum off-key songs and talk to themselves. Some glance at you but others act like you aren't even in the room. You try to pick out a patient from the crowd who doesn't look very... threatening. Just in case.

There's a strange man in a well-ironed navy blue suit who catches your eye. His hair is pushed back and gelled into a stylish sweep, revealing his forehead for others to admire. His nose stands tall and his posture is impeccable. He's arguing with an obvious patient in sweats.

You don't mean to eavesdrop but—

"You're wearing blue!"

"Navy blue to be more precise," the strange man says. "What do you want, Jungkook?"

"I-I c-can't allow it!" Jungkook declares. "Take it off! Take it off!"

Upon closer inspection, the strange man has a name tag on his suit; it is the only thing that ruins his pristine image. Hoseok, it reads. You can't even fathom that he's a patient in a mental asylum.

"That would be considerably inappropriate," Hoseok says. He frowns. "I fancy this suit quite so, Jungkook."

"BLUE!" Jungkook shrieks. He begins to thrash about so hard that you contemplate pushing the red emergency button. But just as you move closer to the wall, Jimin comes to the rescue.

"That's enough wellness center for you, Koo," he tells the crazed man. "Want to go back to your room? The color won't haunt you there." Jimin shoots you an apologetic look. "I'll be right back. Refer to the other clinicians if you need them, okay?" You nod politely. Jimin looks at you gratefully before he and Jungkook walk away.

Great. Now you're left alone in a room filled with a bunch of potentially dangerous crazies.

"You're new here, ma'am?" Hoseok, the patient in the prim and proper suit says. "You aren't a patient here, I suppose?"

"Oh, no," you say, quickly shaking your head. "I'm just here to observe."

Hoseok points to your notebook. "A journalist, Miss...?"

"L/N. But I go by Y/N," you say. "And yes, I am a journalist." You quirk your brows. Insanely observative for him to notice.

"Ah, I reckon you're here to write an article about Merrymoor's imminent closure?" Hoseok drawls on. He sits down on a busted armchair and gestures you to sit across from him. He's so charming, you do exactly as he suggests.

"Well, I'll have to see what Merrymoor is like before I can write such a..." you trail off, trying to rack your brain to find a fitting word.

"Definitive article?" Hoseok finishes for you. Right, definitive. He crosses his legs casually and leans back, exuding the aura of an extremely young but successful CEO rather than a patient at a mental hospital.

"Yes," you say, cocking your head. "A definitive article."

"May I ask how you fancy Merrymoor as of now?" Hoseok says. "Awfully decrepit, isn't it? Such a dingy environment. Yesterday, I'm afraid I found a toenail in my meal. Not much up to par with the other hospitals, this one. Is Merrymoor too run-down for your taste as well, Y/N?"

"Yes, just a bit," you admit. "But so far everything seems to be set up for the best of the patients."

Hoseok laughs a merry laugh. "Y/N, there is hardly any regular Merrymoor inhabitant adept enough to hold an intellectual discourse with me. I'd say I'm always a little more than bored here."

"Oh... I'm sorry." You're not sure how a man like Hoseok got stuck in Merrymoor Hospital. He doesn't look very criminally insane to you at all. Just very well-spoken and well-dressed.

"Oh, you don't have to be sorry," Hoseok smiles. "But it's rather often that I feel forsaken here. With no one to converse with except the clinicians... Even then, they are vigilant around me though I try to convince them I am not dangerous. They check under my blankets—even my mattress. Won't let me around scissors. Y/N, it's almost offensive how fastidious they are."

I doubt any of these patients want to be dangerous on purpose, though. It's obviously a good thing that the clinicians are so attentive. Bonus points.

"They're just looking out for you, Hoseok," you offer. You scribble attentive clinicians in your notebook.

"I would like to beg to differ," Hoseok says. "As you can surely tell, Y/N, I hardly belong here." He gestures at himself and glances detestably at the others in the wellness center. "Quite obviously, there has been a mistake."

"A... mistake?"

"Yes," Hoseok says. He uncrosses his legs and crosses them the other way. Then, he leans forward, clasping his hands in front of him. "You see, I wasn't a very courteous young adult, Y/N. When I was 21, I committed a minor crime that would sentence me to jail for about six years."

You frown.

"Yes, I know," Hoseok sighs. "I've deeply repented my faults before my departure to jail. I was in the prime time of my life, Y/N. I couldn't spend six years in jail at age 21. Not especially when I already mulled over my actions and expressed great remorse to those I hurt..."

His words are so convincing that you nod along with him.

"I remembered what someone had once told me. To get out of an unnecessarily long sentence, all I had to do was fake a mental illness." Hoseok shakes his head disapprovingly. "Apparently, my act was so persuasive, they threw me in Merrymoor instead. Now I can't get out."

"Oh god... How long have you been here?"

"Nearly fifteen years. Almost three times as much longer than my original sentence," Hoseok laughs bitterly. "Turns out, it is incredibly difficult to prove that I am, indeed, sane."

"Oh no..." you breathe. "I'm so sorry..."

"That isn't necessary, Y/N." Hoseok smiles. "But my only wish is for Merrymoor to close down. So I am finally let loose to freedom."

You gulp. His charming smile is so eye-catching that you can barely look away from his handsome face.

"I've always wanted to be a journalist..." Hoseok says sadly. He looks at the notebook in your hands longingly. "Words have always fascinated me, Y/N. You see, the wielder of words is more powerful than any delinquent brandishing a weapon. Words are controllable and may hold so much potent..."

"Oh, I agree!" you smile. "As a journalist, I kinda think of myself as the informer for the people. I write so others can read! And my reports will benefit someone with good information. At least, that's how I like to think of it. I'm glad you think the same!"

"If we didn't meet inside Merrymoor, I would've easily asked you out on a date, Y/N," Hoseok smiles, shaking his head. "But it seems so that dates might be impossible here. There is little to no privacy."

"O-Oh!" Your cheeks flush bright pink. "Maybe you'll have a tribunal one day. And then we'll have to see."

"I'm afraid that might be unlikely," Hoseok sighs. "They are concerned about the feasibility of recidivism..."

"I-I'll visit," you blurt out before you mull over your choice of words. "Maybe you'll feel less lonely then. I have to come back here anyway..."

"Tomorrow. 11 a.m." Hoseok says. He quirks a handsome brow at you curiously. "I'll be waiting."

Your stomach twists in anticipation and you have to look away from his intense stare. "I'll be there."

Once in the safe confines of your room, you open up your laptop and begin to transfer your written notes to an open document. You like to get the most of your workload done the first day, so you end up researching the history of Merrymoor Hospital. Until you read the articles about it up-to-date.

Apparently, if the people finally decide to close down Merrymoor for good, they might turn it into a hotel. Kind of fitting, especially since the wellness center had a striking resemblance to a hotel lobby.

But after a while, you start getting distracted by Hoseok. The charming man had certainly known what he was talking about.

All your life, you've been with guys who didn't bother to read the news or appreciate the art form of journalism. But Hoseok... Even the way he carefully chooses his words is a sign that you and he are a match. If only he weren't in a dilapidating psychiatric hospital. Then maybe you'd have a proper boyfriend who treated you right for once.

Your exes all had one thing in common. They all told you that you talked like a journalist. Apparently, that's a big turn-off. Not as much of a turn-off when they think 'fancy' dressing means wearing cargo shorts with a t-shirt and socks with sandals.

Now Hoseok is a man who is an obvious connoisseur of words and clothes. And you deserve a man like that. A man who is so well-spoken that you become lost in his speech.

Your laptop begins to dim to save battery but you ignore the darker screen and instead, look at your lacking closet. Tomorrow, you should wear something nice for once. Rather than your usual pants and blouse, you should pick out something... more flashy.

At one point in your clothes hunting journey inside your own closet, you remember that the purpose of going to Merrymoor again is not to impress Hoseok but to write an article. Right. Your job always comes first. So you sigh, throwing away your heap of useless and bland clothes to the side and sliding in your desk chair to wake your laptop.

You'll have to finish outlining the main points of the article today. Then maybe you'll let yourself go out and buy a cute outfit for tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes so slowly that you swear time delayed itself while you were asleep and now the world runs not in seconds but in lethargic minutes.

Jimin greets you just like the day before and he seems pleased that you are in a brighter mood than yesterday. For one, the weather isn't as foggy, which actually does wonders to the outlook of the outside of the hospital. Without the fog, Merrymoor doesn't look like a haunted mansion at all. In fact, it looks more like a grandiose museum promising historic artifacts and old texts. Much less terrifying than the previous day.

"How was your visit yesterday?" Jimin chirps as he offers you a cup of hot coffee. His eyes linger on your shorter-than-usual pencil skirt and low-cut, silky black blouse. "I hope it was good." He beams when you accept the coffee with a smile. "Do you have any specific places you want to visit today?"

"Oh, thank you!" you say. "It was great," you tell him truthfully. "The guards already toured me around the outside today, but I was thinking I could visit some individual rooms."

"Of course!" Jimin grins. "The patients should be in their rooms right now. Good timing."

You realize Hoseok had said 11 o'clock with a plan in mind.

"Don't worry," Jimin soothes. "There are two guards at every door so you should feel safe."

Good security x2, you write in your notebook while making Jimin hold your coffee. The clinician beams.

Jimin guides you around the white walls of the hospital. "Did you know, these walls used to be green? In the old days, they thought green stimulated mental health because it represents the color of nature and growth. But I think white looks much better now. Blue is supposed to actually stimulate health, though. But Jungkook's sensitive to blue so we stuck with white for the hallways."

You nod thoughtfully. But you really wonder how Hoseok will greet you today.

"Um, Jimin?"

"Yes?" Jimin turns to you hopefully.

"Can I visit Hoseok? I met him yesterday and I think he'll be great to interview... You know, for the article."

Jimin visibly pales. "Oh... You mean, Jung Hoseok, huh? He's... um, are you sure? Jungkook might be a better candidate for an interview. Maybe even Yoongi. How about Taehyung? Or Seokjin..."

"Yes, I'm sure," you nod. "He's well-spoken so I think I could get good quotes from him. I can visit the rest of the patients later. Is that okay?"

"Um... yeah... sure..." Jimin says but he doesn't sound so sure.

Regardless, he leads you to the door to Hosoek's room. From the open wide slot on the door, you can glimpse at the interior, which looks surprisingly cozy with warm blankets and even a window letting some of the morning sunlight shine in.

"I'll be waiting outside," Jimin says. "The guards will follow you in if that's okay."

"Yeah, thanks."

"No problem!"

When you enter the room, you find that Hoseok's sitting on a little wooden chair in the corner of the room. Today, he's in a classic pinstripe suit with a red tie. He grins brightly when he sees you, but he scowls at the two guards behind you. The guards ignore him, instead, standing at the entrance. You cautiously walk forward.

"Hi, again, Hoseok," you say. "I was wondering if I can get an interview with you today... If that's all right with you."

"Of course that's all right, Y/N," the man beams. "Here," he says, standing up and letting you take the chair. "I prefer standing during serious discussions."

"Oh, of course. Thank you." You slide into the small chair, looking up to face Hoseok. "Can I have your permission to record the interview?"

"Yes, by all means. You look gorgeous, by the way. Lovely skirt. Beautiful blouse."

You blush, tugging at the ends of your pencil skirt. "Thank you." Bringing out your little voice recorder, you clear your throat before pressing record. Then, you begin to speak. "I'll be asking about your stay at Merrymoor Hospital. All you have to do is answer to your best ability. Don't worry if you need a moment to think. Can you please state and spell out your full name? If you are comfortable, you can state your age as well."

Hoseok does so in a relaxed, enchanting voice that makes you wonder how tortuous it will be for you to listen to this interview over and over again to transcribe it.

"Why were you admitted into Merrymoor Hospital? And what year?"

"I didn't quite mean to be admitted into a psychiatric hospital so young," Hoseok hums thoughtfully. "I suppose I was reckless in my twenties... But who isn't?"

You nod. Your twenties were disastrous. Full of bad men, too much alcohol and little to no care for the repercussions.

"I did use my fists quite rashly once when I was twenty-one and that resulted in me getting a six-year sentence for prison," Hoseok shrugs. "The roaring twenties is called the roaring twenties for a reason—aside from the historical reference, of course. Nobody desires to be locked up at the rush hour of their lives, do they?" He smooths back his immaculately gelled hair. "After I severely repented my wrongdoings, I came up with a brilliant idea to reach liberty. I heard they coddle you at mental hospitals before releasing you to freedom after a couple of days. So I figured it was genius to merely act mental.

"But my act was so convincing that they sent me here. In 2005, I was shoved in this little, dingy cell, forced into isolation from the rest of the world and being stripped from my well-deserved privacy." Hoseok scoffs bitterly. "For nearly fifteen years, I've been trying to convince every clinician in here that I am a normal, average citizen. I am definitely not insane. But how do I prove that I am sane?"

The last question rings in the room. You shift in your seat. "If the clinicians are suggesting—"

"Wrongfully accusing," Hoseok corrects with a small nod.

"Right. If the clinicians are 'wrongfully accusing' you of having a mental disorder, then which one is it?"

"They've wrongfully accused me of a plethora of disorders from a medical book. I was forced to take written or multiple-choice or even verbal tests that would prove my insanity," Hoseok says with a scornful frown on his face. "If I made every single clinician in Merrymoor take the same tests that I took, I guarantee you that all of them would definitely come out as positive for one or more disorders. Everyone's a little insane inside."

He grins but it isn't maniacally. It is almost consolingly. Convincingly.

"Are you finished with your inquiries, Y/N?" Hoseok asks. "I have some of my own for you."

"O-Oh, I only asked two questions so far—"

"Will I be able to see you again?" He stands over you with a dominant aura that makes you forget how to deny a request. "I enjoy your company very much, Y/N."

"Yes, surely," you reply. "When would you like to schedule another interview?"

Hoseok grins, reaching forward to pet the perfect curls of your hair. The guards in the back flinch forward but when they realize you're fine with it, they ease their tension.

The man cups your cheek with his hand, which is surprisingly ice cold. You stare up at him with admiration. He laughs quietly under his breath. He's got you wrapped around his finger.

When you're around Hoseok, it's easy to forget your duties as a journalist. You're supposed to poke and prod for information, but Hoseok is so good at speaking that he often gets away with not answering your interview questions directly. There's something about the eloquent way he talks that makes you want to stop everything and just listen to him forever.

Your laptop is open again as you transcribe five days' worth of interviews with Hoseok. Embarrassingly enough, it took five days to get a day's worth of quotes and questions from the handsome man. But you strangely don't mind. Those five days visiting Hoseok over and over again was blissful.

And now that you have no more questions, you don't have an excuse to go to Merrymoor any longer. But it's hard to focus on writing your article (even though the deadline is rapidly approaching) when all you can think of is Hoseok.

He's been trying to convince you that Merrymoor should be closed, but from what you see, Merrymoor isn't the problem at all. The patients are genuinely well-treated and the clinicians are respectful and kind. Safety is a priority, which was the people's largest concern. And even the guards are polite.

If the people wanted to turn Merrymoor into a hotel, they'd have to let go of that thought. Merrymoor should stay as a psychiatric hospital.

Meanwhile, maybe you can put in a good word for Hoseok to get him out of Merrymoor. You admit it had been silly of him to pretend to be mentally ill (especially when psychiatry definitely isn't a joke) but he's obviously matured since he was 21. He's spent nearly fifteen years regretting his past. You think it should come to an end.

Maybe you're doing it for your own good too. You can't help but wonder what your relationship with Hoseok will blossom like outside the hospital. When he pets your hair or caresses your cheek, you feel like you're going to combust. And the last few interviews, you told the guards to stay outside the room. He was this close to kissing you, too. But he had pulled away last second, smiling teasingly at you. It was as if he was saying you'd only get a kiss if he was finally liberated from the confines of what he liked to call the prison cell.

God, you remember how breathless you had been the moment he pulled away. Imagine how breathless you'd actually be if he'd really kissed you.

You let your laptop screensaver go on before sighing. Without a second thought, you grab a coat and rush out of your modest loft. You drive yourself all the way to Merrymoor and park haphazardly in the dirt. The guards are so used to you by now that they let you in immediately.

You're breathless by the time you reach Jimin's office. The young clinician looks surprised but happy to see you. "Y/N!" he greets you warmly. "I didn't know you were coming here again!"

"I have to talk to you!" you blurt out. "Please," you add for good measure.

Jimin laughs. "I didn't know you were so excited to talk to me." Usually, he's wearing his white lab coat but that stays hanging on a coat rack near the door. He has a black turtleneck on with some casual jeans. It's nowhere as near stylish as Hoseok's attire, but he still looks effortlessly fashionable. Jimin looks you up and down and grins. "I see you're participating in pajama day today." He giggles.

You gasp when you realize that in your hurry, you'd forgotten to change out of your home clothes. Your face turns a bright shade of red as you wrap your coat tighter around you. "I-I was in a hurry."

"I can see that," Jimin smiles. "What is it that you want to ask me about?" He sits down on his big chair and gestures for you to sit across from him.

You gather your breath, tucking your hair behind your ears as you take a moment for yourself. Jimin waits patiently.

"It's about Hoseok," you finally gasp.

"Oh. Hoseok..." Jimin sighs. "Yes, our patient. What about him?"

"Well, there's been a mistake," you say. "He's not supposed to be here. He lied about being mentally ill when he was younger, but I'm sure he's learned his lesson by now. Hoseok's as normal as we are," you plead. "He just wants to be released. Get the freedom that he deserves."

To your surprise, Jimin sighs. "Oh no, Y/N..."

"What?" you say, frowning. "What's wrong?"

"God, how do I break this to you?" Jimin shakes his head. "Wow. Um... Well, this is awkward."

"Why is it awkward?" Your inside twist at the impending bad news that you were going to hear any second now. You hope for the worst.

"Well... Y/N... Normal isn't a very good way to describe Jung Hoseok. He's definitely not normal," Jimin says, scratching his head. "I'm his clinician. I should know, right?"

"Not normal? Then...?"

"He's a psychopath, Y/N," Jimin says.

"A what." You deadpan so seriously that it's Jimin who flinches back.

"A psychopath. Not all are dangerous... But some do have a tendency to commit crimes and try to get away from the consequences," Jimin says. "They're cunning, manipulative people, Y/N. Very abnormally large egos. And lack of empathy. They don't feel the way we do."

But Hoseok... He'd... he'd liked you, though.

"I'm sorry," Jimin apologizes. He looks genuine. "The fact that Hoseok tried to fake mental illness to get out of a prison sentence makes him abnormal. He's a clinically diagnosed psychopath."

"What do you mean they don't feel the way we do?"

"They tend to lack emotions like fear and sadness and guilt, Y/N... But they're usually very good at pretending they do," Jimin says. "It's hard for them to make emotional connections with others, but they'll use their charm and way with words to get what they want. Usually, they're a bit narcissistic too. I mean, Hoseok threw a fit when he realized we weren't installing a mirror in his room... And he might think of you as more of a thing than a person."

"A thing?" you scoff incredulously.

"He must've wanted you to feel attracted to him," Jimin sighs. "He probably thought you were the key to getting out of Merrymoor. He's tried that with several other women around here—even men."

You stumble over your words, fists clenching. "You mean he can't really care for me?"

"He might... But for different reasons." Jimin fidgets with his hands. "He cares about you in a sense because you'll benefit him."

"So he's puppeteering me," you scoff. "Like I'm some doll he can show a little bit of love to and I'll come running back to him! God, I'm so stupid!" You bury your face in your hands. "I thought he really liked me..."

"Manipulation is the term we use," Jimin sighs. "Normally, most psychopaths can function well in a given society. But Hoseok's proven to struggle with that a little bit. Um, he has violent tendencies..."

You're left speechless.

And you really thought you could have a future with him. You feel foolish.

"T-Thank you, Jimin," you manage to stutter out. "Thank you for telling me... I just... wow. I fell right into his trap."

"He's a charming man," Jimin smiles warmly at you. He has a way of making you feel better. "I'm sorry... I should've noticed something was up..." His expression shows nothing but warmth.

If Hoseok smiles, you feel the cold ocean breeze kissing your cheeks. When Jimin smiles, you feel like you're basking under an orange sunset where the last of the sunlight warms not just your cheeks but your whole body.

"It's fine," you say, shaking your head. "I should've known better."

Quickly, you stand up, suddenly feeling rather flustered to have a serious conversation with Jimin in your pajamas. "I'm sorry for bothering you," you say. "Um, but good news. I really liked Merrymoor. And even Hoseok couldn't persuade me otherwise."

Jimin's lips curl up in a bright smile. "Oh, that's great! Thank you!"

"I'll make sure to write a good article," you promise. "Maybe you guys can get the funding you need to replace some of the old furniture."

"That'd be amazing," Jimin grins. "Thank you, Y/N. Really."

You shrug. "I'm only relaying the truth to an audience. You and the other clinicians did all the work."

Jimin blushes at the compliment. "Email me when the article is published—so I can brag about it to family and friends."

"Hm," you hum. "Isn't texting much easier?"

You leave Merrymoor Hospital with lost hope for Hoseok but a new number from Jimin. The day doesn't seem so horrible anymore.

Psychopaths value charming, beautiful words that sound like music to the ears. They're fastidious, choosing each word with scrupulous care. It also makes them awfully pedantic to the average person.

You didn't mind Hoseok's elevated vocabulary.

But you do mind the fact that he's incapable of love. With much research, you learn that psychopaths are able to fake their emotions to find their way into the top spots of society. That they value pragmatics over emotions. Usually, they don't even know that they're different. Sometimes that makes them dangerous. Other times, they're just humans with another perspective on life. Just because they have a superficial charm that they may switch off and on at will does not make them insane. It is what they do with their different brains that decide whether they are mad.

The psychopath test is online. And when you look at it, surprisingly, you find yourself checking off a few of the psychopathic points.

Hoseok's right about one thing. Everyone is a little insane inside. Maybe not to the extent of a psychopath who gets in trouble with the law but just enough so that nobody is really normal. Normal is just a social construct people created to form a little more equality in a non-binary world.

You have so many ideas to write about after this article.

You open your laptop, being greeted by a screen full of independent sentences that are yet to be placed in coherent paragraphs. The deadline for the article is near but you've been putting it off to think.

You'll have to paint a beautiful picture of Merrymoor for the readers to make this work. Describe the patients who truly need help and friendly staff who give help when needed. You'll need to make Merrymoor sound as least threatening as possible. To show people that this hospital is more important than whatever hotel that could be there.

Then, you type away.

Halfway through, you get an email notification from an address you don't recognize. Upon further inspection, you realize that Hoseok had somehow acquired your email.

My dear Y/N,

I miss you dearly—I yearn to see your beautiful face again. I've already picked out my best suits to wear when we go on our first date. To my imminent freedom, yes?

Did I ever mention I am prohibited to have a mirror in my cell? Every day is a pain to style myself without the proper tools. I don't think I deserve this kind of prisoner treatment.

Regardless, I hope I can see you soon, Y/N.

Best, Hoseok

It's subtle, the way he tries to get you to put in a few bad words about Merrymoor for him. But now that you know his manipulation tactics, you won't fall for them. You ignore the email and go back to writing.

Merrymoor: Hotel or Hospital?

Everyone in town scrolls through the article Thursday morning as you sit back and relax as the comments and responses flood in. It's the best article you've ever written, according to your editor. People are buzzing about the heroicness of Merrymoor Hospital and marveling at the jobs of the clinicians. The citizens have found respect for them.

You finally reply to Hoseok's email with a link to the article—no other words. He'll have to figure out where you stand for himself. With that, you close your laptop for good.

You'll take a little break from writing for now. Maybe relax a little from your journalist duties and enjoy other people's company. Namely Jimin's.

You're due for a date with him in about... five minutes.

You hope things go well.

[1 YEAR LATER]

"You sure you want to go to his tribunal?" Jimin asks in a worried voice. He wraps his arm around your shoulder and pulls you into his chest.

"I'm sure," you say, snuggling against your boyfriend. "He emailed me, asking me to come. So I'll go. There's no reason to refuse, right?"

Jimin rubs your arms. "Right..." You look at your boyfriend with such adoration in your eyes at Jimin giggles. "What? Do I have something on my face?"

"No, it's just that... you're amazing," you laugh. "You could've easily told me that I was delusional for loving Hoseok. You could've told me not to take part in clinician business especially because I don't even have the right degree. But you didn't do any of that, Jimin. You were respectful. And you just made me... understand."

"Well, that's my job," Jimin says. "I try to make everyone understand and respect each other."

"Hoseok once told me everyone's a little insane inside," you whisper, playing with Jimin's shirt. "Do you think that's true?"

Jimin laughs out loud. "Would you kill me if I said I'm insane about you?"

"Yes, I would!"

"On a more serious note, yes, we're all a little crazy," Jimin says. "You obsessed over your job before you met me, right? My other friend fusses about his looks the whole day. And I'm absolutely crazy about you." You roll your eyes but smile. "Everyone's a little crazy," Jimin chuckles. "But crazy has a whole spectrum of its own."

"So to put it succinctly, normal doesn't exist."

"Exactly."

—masterpost

—masterlist

#ficswithluv #btswritersnet #btswriterscollective #bangtanfairygarden #bangtanidx #hoseok #jung hoseok #hoseok imagine #hoseok fanfic #hoseok fanfiction #bts #bts fanfiction #yn having bad taste in men the never-ending saga #she rlly thought lmfao #brevity

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herewegobacktomoon · 4 years ago

Text

Freaking out

Hi everyone, this is the first time I write a fanfic. I did because after watching 4x03 episode, I had some thoughts about how I would have liked to see Maya and Carina dealing with the freaking out. So, in order not to get crazy, I decided to note down my ideas, hoping that you may like it or interact with me, about what you were expecting or about your ideas about the episode!! I hope you all enjoy the reading.

“So Carina moved in, this morning she made me French toast and I... I know “how nice”, “what a lovely gesture”: my super, super hot Italian girlfriend got up earlier to make this gourmet breakfast and I sat there nearly breaking out in hives because it was so... it was so nice. I mean, too nice? I kept looking around my apartment at her things on my bookshelves and her vagina art, and her bras drying in my bathroom, and I was like “Is this my life now?” I mean... I'm allergic to monogamy, and I moved in with my girlfriend during a pandemic, and there's something wrong with me because she's perfect and I want to be with her.I want to live with her, but it's like my body has a security system that goes off at all the wrong times. Or maybe it's just that Carina is light and lovely and I'm not. I'm dark and messy as hell.”

Maya was heading back home from work, with all these words floating in her head.

It had been an overwhelming day, with all the Sullivan's related stuff, the report, Dixon who did nothing but throwing up roadblocks, Warren who had lost his PRT, and last but not least the call, which had been unpredictably scary, above all for Miller.

The only good thing was that, with Andy, they had started taking one step towards each other, trying to acknowledge some of the mistakes they had made and led them to have their friendship hanging by a thread.

Although apparently she didn't have time to think, all day she couldn't help but thinking about Carina and what had happened that morning.

She thought about her words and couldn't figure out how she was feeling; guilty for what she had said to Andy, angry at herself for not having been able to talk to Carina, or just messy, but it was probably all of them.

She took a deep breath, trying to control her emotions, trying to establish some kind of order between all that chaos she had in her head, and stepped inside.

A warm and soft voice immediately welcomed her “Hi bella, how was your day?”.

Before Maya could answer, Carina had already placed a gentle kiss on her lips, smiling widely but with her eyes not as bright as usual.

Maya felt her heart thudding, a feeling only Carina was able to provoke: “Quite long and tiring, but at least, it all went good. What about you?” she said, walking towards the couch, both to relax a bit and to avoid eye-contact with her girlfriend.

Carina hesitated a little, and then answered, with her voice struggling to sound confident “My day was quite tiring too, I've picked up all my stuff from the boxes and cleaned the house. Now you can sleep well, no more mess around!” she added, smiling, trying to push away what was bothering her.

Maya hinted at a smile, a faded but sincere one, and she went towards the bathroom to take a shower, as if it would have washed away all her insecurities.

Meanwhile, Carina started making dinner, to switch her mind off, but the attempt turned out to be quite an awful solution.

Her head brought her back to that look on Maya's face, to those beautiful warm eyes who seemed to be actual ice that morning. She could tell Maya was absent-minded, but she could only speculate about it as she didn't say a word.

She hadn't said anything to her girlfriend, but as a 100% Italian woman, she had been thinking about it all day, trying to understand what could have been the reason for her reaction, making assumptions which were not helping at all. Her mind started wandering in the darkest places possible and she couldn't stop it from doing so. She had strongly tried to keep herself busy, but it hadn't been that useful.

She wanted to talk to Maya about it, but she was also afraid that a wrong word may have caused a new storm that she had no strength to handle alone right now.

When Maya came back to the kitchen, the situation wasn't that different: she had washed away the sweat, the smog, all the dirt her skin had absorbed in a full-day of work, but her own words, each doubt, every single fear kept stuck to her.

“The dinner's ready, I made you my specialty: panzanella di farro and then, there's also a surprise baking in the oven!” Carina said, getting closer to the table and to Maya, leaning to kiss her forehead.

“I don't deserve you. You're perfect.” the blonde replied, caressing her girlfriend's face, staring at her for a whole minute, as she was a creature who came from another world.

If she could see a light, a stable one, in that storm that had engulfed her that morning, it was her love for Carina: she had no doubt about it, about what she felt for her. It was just that she had to find a way to live that feeling free from anxious thoughts and fear.

They both sat at the table, having dinner quite silently, exchanging just a few words, the necessary ones to keep a conversation going without actually having it.

Half an hour later, between some sips of white wine and some bites of an extremely well-cooked meal, Carina got up to take a sweet-smelling pie. As Maya saw it, she rolled her eyes and claimed:

“Oh God, I'm gonna get sooo fat. Baby, my sweet tooth will undoubtedly thank you later: you know me too well.”

Without even thinking about it, with a soft voice which followed a deep sigh, Carina let these words come out of her mouth: “I wish I would...”

Maya froze: her whole body stopped responding after hearing these words. She knew Carina's tone was warm, with no angst in it, but it was as if her words had switched on something inside her.

With insecurity biting her tongue, Maya asked “Hey babe, is there something wrong?”

Carina's expression suddenly changed, making Maya feeling concerned, as she didn't see it coming at all.

The Italian's eyes got wider, but not with joy: they were teary, struggling to look straightforward as she lowered her head, not to show that she was feeling like the world was crumbling down.

Maya took a step closer, cupping her girlfriend's face in her hands and kissing her softly:“I'm here for you. Tell me, what's going on?”.

“I don't know... I, I don't know how to explain it...” Carina said with her broken voice, in the attempt of keeping her tears in.

Maya took her by the hand and led her to the couch, where they sat, with Carina resting her back on Maya's chest, wrapped in her arms as she tried to calm down.

When they were all cuddled up, probably feeling safer, Carina tried to continue: “ This morning, while we were having breakfast, there was this look you made that...that worried me. I have been thinking about it all day...”

Maya immediately realized: she wasn't the only one who had had to face a storm that day.

Although it was hard for her, to explain her feelings, she decided to try, to make an effort to show Carina it wasn't about her.

“I know...” she said breathing heavily “I freaked out...”

Unconsciously, she tightened her grip on Carina, as if she was afraid to lose her, to make another false move.

The Italian noticed it, but she didn't move, she felt safe. She just took Maya's hand, stroking it softly, to let her girlfriend know she was there, listening to her.

“Why?” she asked warmly.

“Because I don't know how love works... And the table time, was it breakfast or lunch or dinner, never felt like something good to me since I was a child. It was a time for rewards or punishments: there were no in-between, no emotions to be showed.”

Carina's heart started beating faster, as if it was following the pace of Maya's.

“Oh Maya, I'm sorry... I didn't think of it as a possible trigger for you, I didn't want to upset you.”

She turned towards her, for another kiss, before Maya could add “Carina, it's not your fault. Actually you didn't upset me at all: I think that French toast made me orgasm”.

Carina giggled childishly, also quite proudly, and then asked “Why didn't you tell me that? You know that I'm here for you, and I hope you can trust me enough to open up with me. It's hard, I'm aware of it, but we can do it together, one step at the time.”

Maya nodded and squeezed her hand, trying to find the right words to not mess everything up again.

She didn't want to hurt her girlfriend, but she feared not being capable of it: she knew each word as a huge power that can either save you or destroy you.

She hesitated and Carina got up from her chest, now sitting right in front of her, their hands still intertwined: “You can talk, directly, I can handle this. What matters now is that your feelings find their way out, so that you can feel lighter and free.”

Maya was looking at her admiringly: with Carina, everything was different. Everything had always been different, since their very fist meeting, at the bar. It was as if her eyes could read Maya's soul, in such a pure way she didn't think it was possible.

Then, she let out a deep sigh and said: “The more I get to spend time with you, the more I think I'm the luckiest person on this world.” a very much needed kiss interrupted her speech again, but it was worth it. It gave her enough confidence to keep talking.

“Well, you know... I feel like it's kinda weird having this conversation with my girlfriend, but I need to, so...as you probably know, in my CV, just right after gold medalist champion and Firefighter captain, you can find “queen of monogamy”, I mean you could have found it if you had read it before I had met you. Ok this is quite awkward...” Maya was twisting her tongue, but Carina smiled at her, with a smirk which somehow reassured her. “Keep going, this story caught all my attention, Miss Maya – monogamy is for the weak- Bishop”.

Maya couldn't help but smile “I keep wondering why Vic can't just keep her mouth shut sometimes, my position is quite embarrassing at this point. Anyway...all this just to say that this was my life before you: occasional hook-ups which were nothing but an enjoyable night of self-care. But I've never known what loving someone feels like...I mean, most of my relationships, with my father, my mother or even my brother had always let me down, because of them or because of me, I don't know... but what happened is that I decided to throw away my feelings, shutting them up so that I didn't have to face disappointments anymore...”

Carina stared at her, listening carefully to every single word the blonde was saying and never loosening her grip on Maya's hand, delicately rubbing her thumb over it, to remind her that she had no intention to leave.

Maya's heart fastened her pace, causing her little trouble breathing, but she continued: “With you, it's different. Everything is new, my life has completely changed. To make things clear, it's not my “monogamy queendom” that I miss, because I love you so freaking much you have no idea. What I'm lacking of is a start point, a path to follow. I do truly love you like I never loved anyone else, but it feels like my body has a security system that doesn't allow me to do what I'd like to.

I fear that I could hurt you and that freezes me, every time...”

As Maya's eyes were starting to become sadder, Carina noticed it and took her into her arms.

Between a light kiss on the shoulder and a deeper one on the neck, Carina says “I know, it takes time to learn new stuff, above all where it's a totally new experience. But I want you to remember this: if I'm here, if I stayed, it's because I love you. It's true, people can hurt each other, but that doesn't mean they can't also heal each other. You made a mistake, it's true, but I forgave you and every day that goes by, your presence and your love are able to mend my scars.

I love you Maya and if you don't know the path to cross, it's not a big deal: we'll build one of our own and we'll find out how love works.”

Maya knew, in that precise moment, that asking Carina to move in with her, was the best choice she could have ever made: her words had made the storm in Maya calm down, leaving a little fire lit up, one of those fires which only ignite happiness.

Out of the blue, without saying a word she stood up, Carina looking at her with no clue of what was happening, and she grabbed her by the hand, pulling her in for a hug. Carina couldn't help but smile, kissing her girlfriend lips, lowering to her neck, and then finding her way to her collarbone.

With a smirk and her eyes full of both happiness and love, Maya said “I may not know what path to follow, but if we have to build our own one, I'm sure our first step is towards the bedroom.”

Carina nodded with a smirk “No doubts, Captain. I'll follow your lead”.

#station19 #maya bishop #carina deluca #marina #stefania spampinato #daniellesavre #fanfic #wlw #grey's anatomy

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vympirestake · 5 years ago

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The Lost Boys x Reader - Having a Feeling s/o is in Danger Headcannons

Requested by Anon

Not my GIFs

David:

If David feels like something bad will to happen to you he’s checking in constantly but keeping his feelings mostly quiet

He likely won’t tell anyone other than Dwayne or maybe Marko (if he truly needs to get it off his chest) just because Paul will accidentally tell you or rope Marko into helping Paul tell you which David is not happy about

Like, yeah, something might happen but he doesn’t know for sure so in his mind it's better to keep you a bit in the dark rather than get you all scared

Although you can bet your ass if he feels like anywhere but the cave is going to be particularly dangerous one night you are not leaving

He can and will keep you secured on his lap in that old wheelchair while the other boys go out

He’ll coo in your ear that he just “wanted to spend some extra time with you” and rub your arms and back oh so gently but inside he’s getting more and more nervous about something eventually happening and him not being there

Protective to the max until the feeling blows over

If David feels like something bad is happening to you at that moment he is on the trail before the boys can even ask what’s wrong

If someone is hurting you when David shows up, all bets are off

He is going to kill whoever hurt you, even if they ran off he will find them eventually

Likely won’t eat them, he doesn’t want a meal out of them he just wants revenge for what they have done

Only after he’s killed them/mildly satisfied they fled the scene, David gently helps you up and envelops you in his arms, just burying his head in your neck so he can take a few shuddering breaths

He feels like he almost lost you, like he almost lost a piece of himself

David is 100 percent going to keep even closer to him most likely via making you move into the cave or even just outright turning you

At the least he will be with you 24/7 or, if he can’t be there (and there would need to be some end-of-the-world stuff going down to get him away) he keeps the boys with you

If David feels something is happening to you and ends up being wrong, he tries to play off his sudden presences as cool as he possibly can

“Oh--uh--what are you doing here?”

“David I live here wtf.”

Even if the bad feeling is gone, David is still going to watch over you for a while

He needs to be sure that everything is ok again before letting his guard down

Paul:

Baby boy is just so damn upset if he feels like something bad is going to happen to you

Paul will absolutely keep attached to your hip (granted it’s not like he wasn’t constantly stuck there to begin with) even if the feeling goes away with nothing happening

Paul is definitely going to wake you up multiple times in the dead of night because he was trying to wrap himself around your sleeping form entirely

It makes him feel a little better, likes he’s being a big shield so nothing can hurt his s/o

He constantly wants to hold your hand, or at least some part of you, while out

It gives him a little bit of physical comfort and also lets the both of you know that the other is right there and not leaving anytime soon

Paul tells all of the other boys as soon as he feels anything bad

Be prepared to have Marko or Dwayne not-so-subtly watching over you just ‘cause they’re getting a little worried about you too

If Paul feels like something is happening to you, he either grabs Marko before leaving to find you or just leaves without saying anything

(There’s a pretty good chance Marko follows anyway just to see what’s up)

If you’re hurt when Paul find you, he gets so angry so fast it almost scares you more

Not angry at you, never you, but rather at the bastard who thought must have thought it was ok to do this

Though his anger fades with one soft “Paul?”

Before you know it he’s at your side carefully looking you over and asking all kinds of questions non-stop

Once Paul knows you are ok (or at least ok enough to move) he’ll take you to the cave so you can rest in the safety of the other boys

Paul would stay for a while, holding your hand and trying to bandage you up (he’s not doing so well but he’s trying his hardest)

Remember how he was when avenging Marko? Yeah, Paul is coming home blood soaked, but happy to have some vengeance for you

But if he felt something bad was happening and was wrong, Paul just embraces you as tight as he can

He was so scared and angry at the though of you being harmed that seeing you perfectly ok is euphoric to him

Prepare to not being able to breath for a little while

Dwayne:

Normally, Dwayne is fairly protective but if he feeling like you are in danger that protection goes through the roof

If he would usually look to where you are every couple minutes to make sure you’re ok

Now he is right next to you, with his jacket draped over your shoulders, looking to everyone else constantly

Dwayne knows what he and the boys are and he understands that for as “quiet” as Santa Carla is, there are threats everywhere either in the form of Max, other vampires, or those Frog boys

Whether on the boardwalk or in the cave, he has you gently pulled on his lap with his head resting in the crook of your neck

He was absolutely doing that before but there’s a layer of fear to it now, like if he lets you go for even a moment, you’ll leave

Dwayne either tells all the boys or none of them

He cares about you so, so much but he doesn't want you to be scared over something that might not even happen and having the boys worry over you too will just make it worse

What do you mean you can't just pick up and hide away with him on a whim :(

He just wants you to be as safe as you can be, and if cradling you against himself for hours on end is what makes you feel safe then so be it

If Dwayne feels like something bad is happening to you he quickly looks around, almost surprised you aren’t there before running off to get you

His mind is racing with every single bad thing that could be happening to you with every moment it takes to be with you again

If there is someone harming you in some way when Dwayne gets there, they are removed immediately

Dwayne normally wouldn’t kill like that in front of you if you’re still human but this time he couldn’t hold back

The moment it’s finished he’s checking you over for any cuts or bruises and apologizing like he’s been possessed

In Dwayne's mind he feels he should have been there, that this never would have happened if he didn’t leave you out of his sight

It takes your gentle hand on his cheek and whispered promises that this is by no means his fault for him to calm enough to take you home

You best believe you are not leaving his side anytime in the near future

You’ll spend multiple nights and lazy dawns just lying in a protective embrace, Dwayne trailing his hands along your arms and stomach

If Dwayne’s feeling ended up being wrong and you are a-ok, he is just a wreck

Like Paul, the though of what could have happened to you just consumes him

He needs some quality snuggles after the whole ordeal

Marko:

If Marko feels like something bad is going to happen to you, he really doesn’t change all too much

He holds you a little tighter, his kisses become a little more passionate

Maybe he’ll ask Paul to keep an eye out for you if Marko himself is off doing something away from you

But other than that, you don’t think much when he pulls you onto his lap, his hand finding purchase on the small of your back to keep you exactly where you are

Or when his fingers absentmindedly toy with the drawstrings of your hoodie while he’s deep in thought

What will really tell you that something is not ok is when you move walk to away, just for a moment, while he isn’t paying attention, and his hand surges forward to grab your own before you can leave

He may not show it, but deep down Marko is scared that you could potentially be in danger

Especially when he doesn’t even know what the danger is

Like Dwayne, Marko knows what kind of problems you will run into just for being associated with him and the other boys

The most he can do is watch over you and hope that this silly feeling will just go away on its own with nothing happening

If Marko feels like something is happening to you, like most of the other boys he immediately looks around for you before taking off

He tries not to think of the things that could be happening, instead Marko just focuses on getting to you as soon as possible

If someone is hurting you when he gets to you, Marko yells to get their attention off of you

If he can, he is going to get them to go away for now so he can watch over you, he’ll deal with them later anyway

If they refuse--dead on the spot

Soon Marko is at your side just holding you a little, looking you over and asking if you’re ok

He gets you to the cave as fast as he can, knocking the other boys out of the way so he can get you alone and cleaned up in peace

He feels terrible for what just happened, regardless of how many times you tell him it’s all ok

But if feels like something bad was happening only to find you ok, he just acts like he wanted to see you and that was all

Marko’ll hang around for a little while just checking the surroundings and watching for anyone who could be a threat

Really, he’s just so happy he was wrong and that you aren’t in harms way, for now at least

Bonus -

Star:

If Star feels like something bad is going to happen to you she gets a little more paranoid than she might be usually

She is looking over her shoulder more to check there is no one acting strange around you

David calls her out on it after she nearly jumps some guy looking you over and so she comes clean with what she’s feeling

But Star really doesn’t want everyone to be acting up on something that might not even really happen

You keep with the little nightly walks and adventures, her fingers forever threaded with yours

But if the feeling gets too strong, Star’ll try to entice you into staying in the cave so you can go through the old rooms or listen to some old record the other boys found

As long as she can see you or feel your general presence, Star is more than happy

If you don’t have your own motorcycle (or car really) and have to ride with one of the boys, she absolutely subtly threatens them

David or Paul pulls some stupid stunt and she nearly rips their head off cause “you could have hurt them you idiot!”

If Star feels like something is happening to you at that moment, she gets a little disoriented like her world is shifting before taking off to find you

Seeing Star run off prompts the rest of the boys to follow after her, she may be fierce but they still want to make sure that not only Star is ok but you are too

If she comes across someone in the act of hurting you she is screaming at them like you wouldn’t believe

Every even slightly mean name in the book is being hurled at them with the full fury of a very angry Star

One moment she’s screaming, and the next Star is right next to you holding your face and so very gently stroking your hair asking if you’re alright

She’s on the verge of tears herself just imagining what could have happened had she not shown up

She’ll lead you back to the comfort of the cave, shushing any worries about whoever had been hurting you

“Sh, it’s ok, alright? They’re not gonna hurt you. I-I’ve got you.”

While Star gets you changed and calmed down, the boys come back looking concerned but mostly they seem pretty sure nothing like that is going to happen again

If Star happens to find you just fine, she’s just going to be a nervous wreck

She’ll tell you what she had felt and it will take some time but she’ll calm down enough to understand that you are not hurt

She hesitates to let you go anywhere without her for a little while but things mostly just go back to how they had been

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officialotakudome · 4 years ago

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New Post has been published on Otaku Dome | The Latest News In Anime, Manga, Gaming, Tech, and Geek Culture

New Post has been published on https://otakudome.com/wandavision-season-1-review/

WandaVision Season 1 Review

The new era of Marvel Television begins with WandaVision. Following the events of Avengers: Endgame, Wanda Maximoff has continued her grief stricken life in wake of the death of her lover Vision. With her powers ever growing Wanda takes the small town of Westview hostage to cope in a mind-binding super hero take on classic and modern sitcoms.

WandaVision is a 2021 superhero sitcom, it is produced by Marvel Studios and distributed by Walt Disney. It aired exclusively on Disney+. Season one is currently available in its entirety.

Editor’s Note: Near complete to complete spoilers for WandaVision and the Marvel Cinematic Universe as a whole may be present within this review.

The next stage in the Marvel Cinematic Universe begins in WandaVision.

WandaVision begins a new era for the Marvel Cinematic Universe as the first of insanely big budgeted TV series for the Disney+ platform. After the shut down of Marvel Television and incorporating it into Marvel Studios proper many were worried about the future of Marvel properties coming to the small screen. Thankfully while it’s not necessarily on traditional TV the small form Marvel content will continue in even greater heights due to Disney’s push for it’s streaming platform. And WandaVision is already a big part of that move. Acting as an homage to classic sitcoms old and modern WandaVision is a superhero trip that’s for fans of all Marvel content.

WandaVision’s consistent roller-coaster ride story keeps viewers on their toes.

THE GOOD: The series takes place sometime after Endgame. The world is still recovering from the snap reverse & the fact that time has skipped for a majority of the world. Wanda, still grieving over the loss of her lover Vision has lost control of her powers and even some of her sanity. She unknowingly uses her powers to change the small town of Westview into the image of the TV sitcoms she watched with her family as a child. Fearing her power Wanda is investigated by S.W.O.R.D a government agency meant to be the space focused version of S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Monica Rambeau has a particular interest in Wanda sympathizing with her after losing her mother to cancer. Believed to be having a waning mental state Wanda changes the world design of Westview based on different eras of TV sitcoms. Wanda is eventually revealed to be mostly sane choosing Westview as her method of coping having lost Vision twice.

As the world design changes so does the storyline Wanda created for the series, including the title, aspect ratio, and cast of characters. Wanda becomes pregnant and soon gives birth to twins. Meanwhile S.W.O.R.D has been sending in agents in an effort to stop Wanda and save the citizens of Westview. But they instantly become apart of Wanda’s Westview upon entering. Even the sympathetic Rambeau becomes a victim of it. The more S.W.O.R.D. intervenes the more erratic Wanda becomes in retaliation. Rambeau eventually regains herself after escaping Westview and returning to real life.

Vision becomes suspicious of Wanda after strange interactions with his co-workers & neighbors. The twins have also begun aging at an accelerated rate and also gain superpowers. One night Vision finally has enough and questions Wanda only for her “brother” Pedro to appear. This Pedro is in the form of the FOX’s X-Men universe, but Wanda has complete recognition of him. S.W.O.R.D ramps up it’s attack on Westview and Vision finds the exit for the altered Westview. As he attempts to escape the area, Wanda’s powers resists him and he’s nearly erased. When his son feels Vision’s pain Wanda increases the reach of the altered Westview which encases others including Darcy who was helping S.W.O.R.D.

Vision and Darcy become apart of the rebooted Westview with slight memory loss. Vision recognizes Darcy and they work together to return to Wanda. However, the world is rejecting them causing a multitude of distracts that stop them in their tracks. Eventually regaining their memories Vision flies off to Wanda, leaving Darcy behind. Wanda feels as if she’s losing control of the world and Agatha Harkins who kidnapped the she reveals she was behind all of the chaos. Agatha reveals that she is an actual witch from the Salem trials era and wanted to absorb Wanda’s powers to control the Darkhold an ancient spell book with powerful magic. Agatha also reveals that Wanda holds the title of Scarlet Witch an ancient witch with chaos magic abilities. S.W.O.R.D unveils a man-made version of Vision which was made from the original with intent to be controlled on their command.

As Agatha threatens the boys in front of Wanda and Vision returns only to be attacked by White Vision. A dual battle ensues between Agatha & Wanda and Vision & White Vision. After a conversation Vision returns White Vision’s memories causing him to abandon S.W.O.R.D. and fly off. Agatha & Wanda’s fight makes it to town where the citizens memories have returned. Begging Wanda to free them she complies only to stop when Vision & the boys begin to disappear. Monica who had returned to the world with her DNA changing her into a superhuman offers to help Wanda. She & the boys along with Vision fight and defeat S.W.O.R.D who were intervening.

Agatha has released magical runes which has taken over the altered Westview. Just as it appears that Wanda has been defeated she reveals that she tricked Agatha. Taking control of Agatha’s runes Wanda transforms into the Scarlet Witch and defeats Agatha. Instead of killing Agatha she returns her to her fake Westview personality as a hostage planning to use her vast knowledge in the future.

Head of S.W.O.R.D, Director Hayward is arrested for his actions. Monica and Agent Woo who had been trying to protect Wanda take care of clearing her name as she heads off with her family. As she releases Westview from her control she says goodbye to her family. Monica is visited by a Skrull posing as a human who invites her to the S.H.I.E.L.D station in space. Wanda studies the Darkhold in her Scarlet Witch form and suddenly hears her children crying her name.

WandaVision is a story of overcoming loss and grief.

Initially, WandaVision is rather slow paced, but picks up around episode threeish. As a fan of nearly all of the sitcoms parodied I think the series personally connects with me more than the average viewer. I was able to get all the references and inside jokes, but I can see someone who isn’t particularly a fan of even one of said sitcoms being lost & put off from the direction. Also just wanted to shout that I was shocked a bit seeing the Malcolm in the Middle repping, but happily so as it’s probably my favorite sitcom of all time. This was surprisingly laxed in action compared to previous MCU work. However, given the focus was to establish magic, multiverses, and other key Marvel elements into Phase 4 this is understandable. Though I can see the heavy focus on story & world building being a major turn off for casual MCU fans. In regards to the action, while it was there it’s what you’d expect from a big budgeted Marvel project. However, I must stress that there’s a rather large absence of it.

The twists and turns that start to unfold midway through the series is a fun ride. And WandaVision knows how to have fun with itself. Commercials were used as inside jokes and one even references Hydra. Kathryn Hahn as Agatha also kind of stole the show with her always on energy. She flourishes with the comedic villain character type. The acting as a whole is probably some of the strongest currently in the MCU.

The series features big implications for the future of Marvel Studios.

THE BAD: The series is a slow burn in such a way that you may have to take small breaks. Normally binging would be an advantage here with every episode being available. But even so it can be a turn off until about episode three or four when things really kick into place. There’s also some balancing issues with the storytelling. Like for example there’s a mailman who frequently pops up as if he’s an important character to the show like Agatha, but it goes no where. There’s a handful of times where it felt like the story went there with certain threads. Also viewers should be warned that this is lacking on action compared to previous Marvel efforts. With most of said action being restricted to the final episodes.

WandaVision is a successful first entry into the Disney+ Marvel TV era.

OVERALL THOGHTS: WandaVision isn’t perfect, but it sets up the future of the MCU in a beautiful way. Though there are a few pointless teases and some stories feeling like they were flat out dropped. Despite this, WandaVision (mostly) lives up to it’s hype. Even with some early opening hiccups for the series. Otaku Dome gives WandaVision an 80 out of 100.

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nxncydrews · 4 years ago

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midnight in salem: a review

Your girl finally beat Midnight in Salem last night and...I have thoughts. Feelings. Concerns. But also hope? This review is like a year late but whatever. Overall, I didn’t hate the game nearly as much as I thought I would, and I was fully prepared to loathe it. Spoilers are under the cut for anyone who hasn’t played it yet! (also...it’s long lol)

The general gist of it is this: Midnight in Salem is an okay game. There are some glaring issues that I’ll talk about in more detail, but there is a foundation that I feel is strong for the future. Even with the problems I saw I don’t think MID is the weakest in the series (MED and RAN still claim those spots). Let’s break it down.

Good: the mystery. Although I guessed Teegan’s role in the fire early on, I thought the overall storyline was compelling and that they did a good job of intertwining the characters and motivations in ways that wasn’t super obvious. The one problem I did have with the story is I felt like I couldn’t follow up with characters as much as I wanted to. For example, you can go upstairs in the museum and discover pretty early on that the Parry family changed their name from Parris but you can’t ask Teegan about it until she brings it up much later in the game—and even then it’s not something you prompt, it’s something she just gives up. I also think I found out about things in dialogue before I was supposed to as though branches of the dialogue tree were incorrectly crossed. Despite that, I think the mystery was good...just needed a little more refining to pull it all together. There were also a few threads that didn’t get tied up (do we just assume that Jason mimicked Olivia’s smoke bombs because he watched her in the square?).

Bad: the linearity. The thing that I loved (and hated) about past games was that you could hit moments where it wasn’t always clear where you were supposed to go next. With MID, however, you were led from location to location with little reason to return to other places when you finished the single task you needed to do. You would start at the Parry’s house, go to town square, make one trip out to Hathorne House, go back to the town square and repeat the next with a random trip to Lauren’s shop instead of Hathorne. And with the lack of locations to begin with...it just felt like it was a small game without much to do. That said, some of my favorite games have had a much smaller setting (TRT, for example) and did it well. So perhaps this issue could’ve been fixed with more complexity added to the puzzles and additional side quests.

Good: the voice acting and characters. Look, I loved Lani as Nancy Drew and she will always have a special place in my heart, but the new voice of Nancy has won me over. She’s got the exact type of energy I imagine and had a more modern voice. I do think she was one of the weakest voice actors in the game (random lines seemed to feel out of place emotionally, but that could just as much be on the editing team as the voice actor), but I still liked her overall. The rest of the voice cast was also great, which helped to carry a script that I felt was weak at moments—there were times when the dialogue was just...bad. The characters as a whole felt unique and fun, and I really loved the interactions between Deirdre and the Hardy Boys. I would argue that the strongest part of the game is the characters, even if I do think they could’ve gone further with some of the friendships and relationships that were hinted throughout the game (Judge Danforth and Jason, Mei and Jason, Teegan/Olivia/Lauren, etc). I also liked that the characters felt more alive...moving around, in multiple places, etc. The positioning of characters when they followed you was...unfortunate at times. Deirdre scared me every time I turned around and navigating the tunnels at the end of the game was nearly impossible with how characters constantly blocked your view.

Bad: the graphics. This is obviously something that has been complained about since the beginning, and it’s for good reason: the graphics were lackluster. I have a pretty good laptop so I was able to play on high settings, but even then they weren’t nearly as good as I was expecting for how long they worked on the game. The character models are one of the most glaring issues: choppy and awkward animations, a lack of texture and shadows, and those really freaky eyes. The environments, though slightly better, still felt as though they were built from unity assets that the developers picked up off online stores and threw together. I couldn’t stand looking at the leaf piles on the ground or the street outside the Parry house because they were so incredibly flat. The final puzzle scenes felt better to me, as did Olivia’s shop and even the graveyard, so it’s clear that they can do better, but that level (or even higher level) of detail needs to be present in everything. The lighting is another huge issue—it was extremely flat in most parts of the game and took away a lot of the mood that could’ve been set. That said, I think graphics can be improved....if they put in the money and resources.

Good: the puzzles and interact-able objects. The puzzles that we did have in the game were fun and varying, which I think is important in mystery games. Some of the controls in the puzzles were really frustrating (more on the controls later), but there wasn’t a puzzle that I flat-out couldn’t solve. I also liked the way we could rotate objects and see all sides of them but again, the controls were a little frustrating.

Bad: the number of puzzles. There just wasn’t enough puzzles for me, particularly puzzles that directly affected the storyline. For example, you can find a ripped-up note in the trash can in the Parry house but it’s never referenced again and you don’t actually need to do it to solve the mystery. Same with the piece of the flyer you find in the scarecrow. I think I saw a reddit thread or a post here that suggested things with book sorting or doing stuff with displays in the museum as additional puzzles and I 100% agree that they’d be great (and easy) additions to the storyline. Or maybe even helping Olivia with doing her store inventory (as we see on her list that she clearly doesn’t want to do it).

Good: the mini-games. I loved the pumpkin quest and making johnny cakes (though I wish we could’ve actually made the various recipes and not have done the flipping part 6 times). I also loved making the herb mixtures! I honestly don’t have any complaints here. I think there was a good amount of them and they were fun to come back to.

Bad: the controls. While I appreciate what HER was trying to do with the controls, I really don’t think they worked. The “looking around” in a scene is cool in theory, but the actual act of dragging around an object was tedious and frustrating. The movement through the town square was really annoying, too—it took me forever to get from one side to the other. I think the yellow glow around the cursor when you found something to interact with could be a little more prominent, too. I think if HER wants to continue using this setup then they need to fix the cursor sensitivity to deal with how slow looking around a scene can be when dragging. I think we also could’ve done with a way to read the logs of conversations because I definitely missed a few things when I looked away for a second.

Good: Deirdre. Shannon. I love her. So much. She’s absolutely fantastic. Her snark was great and I really appreciated how they gave her autonomy and actively contribute to the case. I would’ve loved for her to be playable (like maybe we follow her to do research on the town or search for the will), but I can’t complain about the amount we saw her. Her scenes with the Hardy Boys were some of my favorite in game....and I really hope we continue to have her as a phone contact in future games (if not see her in person again!).

Bad: no charm. Despite some high points with characters and the mystery, overall this game just lacked the charm of the past. I know some of this stems from moving to Unity and the subsequent changes to graphics and models, but I really feel like so much of the uniqueness to the games was stripped away as well. There are some easy changes that I think could fix this, starting with the UI and dialogue display and working to improve the lighting and character models. Nancy Drew needs a small amount of grittiness, I think, and a clean, modern look just doesn’t feel right.

Good: throwbacks to old games. I appreciated that there were some throwbacks to old games mixed in as you went and that some of our old familiar easter eggs popped up (Koko Kringle candy, for one!). I like to think that the black cats in Olivia’s shop were throwbacks to Suki from SAW (though that one is unlikely) and there was also a mention of a Waverly Academy, though I think this was either a mistake or unintentional because the letter is for an art school and Waverly was a boarding school. I was hoping for a Kate Drew reference when on the phone with Carson, but alas. Here’s hoping they continue to bring past games into new ones.

Bad: the lack of depth. I felt like overall the game only scratched the surface of what it could’ve in terms of bringing in more history and complexity. The lack of puzzles and overly-linear story made it a pretty quick solve and the characters, though interesting, could’ve done with more interaction with each other. More puzzles, more history, and more side quests could’ve helped with this immensely. (Oh, and get rid of the ridiculous side love triangle and manufactured drama with Ned and Nancy. That’s something worth it’s own post, however.)

tl;dr I wouldn’t go so far to say that MID was a roaring success or met the expectations I had for the game, but I do think there is hope for the future if we get more games. The mystery was solid and there are some good things that came from it, but they’ve got a lot of work to do to bring the next game back to the quality level that we saw in past eras. If anything, this did make me want to play through all the old games in order again, which I haven’t wanted to do in years.

Time to go open photoshop and make all the Mei/Jason and Frank/Deirdre graphics and get back in the edit game!

#mid #midnight in salem #clue crew #nancy drew #midnight in salem review

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