#I have been watering CAT POOP for a WEEK
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— BURNER CELL ; 2 ; DABI ; 荼毗
summary: after a week of silence, you finally text dabi. pairing: dabi / f!reader ; quirkless word count: 1.3k tag: humor, maladjusted dabi meets normal adult woman, flirting, canon-based world building, cancer mention, texting as a plot device, slight au, univeristy student!reader a/n: this stole all my concentration. siri play emo boy by ayesha erotica ← previous | the tag
It's the kind of week where, aside from class, human interaction isn't really on life's setlist.
It's also the kind of week where you rediscover making a meal of raw cookie dough straight from the package. Your econ textbook might have a stranglehold on you, but you make enough time to scarf down a few globs between chapters — after all, who needs protein or fiber when you're sure this five-year master's program will kill you first?
Your head hurts.
You slump against the counter, refilling your water bottle.
It's late now — and you can feel the quiet woes beginning to wane as you blink at the clock. By now, your friends are probably on their second or third drinks. You turned the invite down when they asked yesterday. Nuri tugged on your sweater sleeve and pouted the best pout she could manage, but you didn't budge.
I've gotta finish this paper, I'm sorry, Nur'.
You roll your jaw as you shut the faucet off, wandering to your freezer to wrangle some cubes from the tray. You bend it slowly, deep in thought. A few pop out, and you idly drop them into your water bottle with a twang.
You're staring at your phone. It's by your computer on the counter.
...You never did text Dabi.
You told yourself it was for the best — after all, you weren't looking for a catastrophic derailment of your life at the moment. Things are good. You're two semesters away from finishing University, your family's bakery back in Kyoto is doing well, and Dad's chemotherapy seems to be working. Things are good! It's almost fall, you've managed to stick to your monthly budget, and Mizu settled in happily to your new apartment.
No four-day poop strike like the last time you moved.
The large tuxedo cat in question ambles through the kitchen — brushing against your leg and letting out a long, low mrrooow.
Things are great!
You shouldn't text Dabi.
But... even if you did, it's not like it'd be the end of the world, right?
Wait, could he figure out where you lived from your number...?
You could use one of those anonymous texting services. Then, it wouldn't even be your number. Just some fake string of digits that allow you to satiate the bizarre curiosity that's been swirling in your head for the last week.
You're sure the novelty will wear off.
He's probably not even going to respond.
You're telling yourself this is stupid as you begin to set up an account with the service — the app boasts privacy, andunlimited calls and texts... You can't help but feel a little strange as you finalize your account.
It's done.
You import his contact with two taps and stare at the blank screen.
...Now what?
Are you really going to do this? I mean — he's a wanted criminal. He's a member of the League of Villains. If anyone ever found out you were in contact with him, you'd be toast. You'd have All Might kicking your door in and demanding to look through your phone and that mental image is enough to make you cringe. Say goodbye to your degree, goodbye toyour future as Sakura Flour's owner, and goodbye to freedom. You're sure the Safety Commission would place you on some watch list for the rest of your life, and frankly, your tweets are already questionable. You don't need more scrutiny.
...So, there are two options.
Delete his number and move on... or don't get caught.
You shouldn't text Dabi.
...But, you do.
Truth be told, he isn't shocked to see that cute Nuri girl hanging on Giran's arm again. The Broker seems pretty into her — the guy even mentioned something about taking her to a nice dinner during the week as a congrats on passing some big test. Dabi can't blame him. She's cute. Looks good in red. Not his type, but he can appreciate it from time to time.
However, Dabi is a little shocked that you're not a part of the group cheering in Giran's VIP section. There's bottle service being ordered, laughter, dancing, and a gaggle of pretty, five college girls — and none of them are you.
His lips twist into a scowl.
He decides he's leaving; his piss-poor drink is tossed back, and he dumps a bill down for the bartender before tugging his hood up and sucking his teeth.
He never liked this club anyway.
He's crossing the threshold of the back door, stepping into the damp and dark alley, when the phone in his back pocket buzzes. Someone's smoking a Marlboro by the dumpster. The familiar smell makes Dabi's fingers twitch.
He's tryna quit.
He tugs the phone from his pocket, no longer bothered by the splintered glass screen. His battery is at 13%. This fuckin' thing barely holds a charge anymore.
The number on the screen isn't one he knows.
Dabi's passcode is unnecessarily long. His phone clicks open as he narrows his eyes and shambles towards the opening in the alley. He doesn't know this number. He has everyone's cell memorized that he needs. Shigaraki, Toga, Spinner, Jin, Compress, even Giran. He doesn't keep contacts. Doesn't work when he's ditching phones all the time. He's got his noggin. That's good enough.
The text is one word:
hi.
Dabi's squinting at the text when another buzzes through.
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:48pm sorry, this is bar girl
→ dabi ; 11:46pm thought u were never gonna txt me ur girlie nuri is here where r u
There's no way.
Your phone buzzes three times from its far place where it sits face down on the counter — you just walked away from it, hellbent on distracting yourself while you waited out the potential reply. You go rigid in your kitchen.
Did he seriously text you back immediately?
You purse your lips, then slink towards the phone. It buzzes again.
→ dabi ; 11:47pm c'mon don't leave me hangin pretty
Your eyes are wide as you stare at the string of replies. He has read receipts turned on like the psychopath he is.
You lean back against the counter, chewing your cuticle as you let out a ragged sigh. Nuri is with him? Or... No, they said they were going to that club you hate.
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:4pam oh, are they at the bar?
Dabi's fingers move fast.
→ dabi ; 11:49pm nah in downtown club tropical or whatever the fuck it's called
You snort a little.
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:49pm i hate that place. their drinks suck.
Dabi has started making his way back to their hideout — back to the shit box apartments they're renting above Kurogiri's bar. He's slow, idly texting as he weaves through the crowds of nightlife in Kamino Ward.
→ dabi ; 11:50pm a girl after my own heart where r u ur dodging my question u on a date or smthng????
He's insistent, you'll give him that. You cross your legs as you lean back against the laminate counter and chew the inside of your lip.
He's typing. It starts, then stops, then starts again.
When you start typing, the bubble disappears.
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:50pm nah, got a huge paper to finish uni student, remember? sorry to disappoint
→ dabi ; 11:51pm ur missin out giran got bottle service him and nuri looked cozy
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:51pm not shocked she thinks she can fix him
→ dabi ; 11:51pm ooooo love when that happens poor girl
Typing...
Typing...
→ dabi ; 11:51pm u think u can fix me? :p
The emoji makes your face break into a smile — it's so... not what you expected.
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:52pm nah i'm not stupid
→ dabi ; 11:52pm just busy.... really lame of u tbh coulda been fun
← 909.999.3399 ; 11:52pm wasting cash on mid drinks is the opposite of fun
→ dabi ; 11:52pm i meant seeing me
Oh, what the fuck.
Why does that text make your face feel hot? Why does that text make you feel like you're not texting the League of Villain's #1 Arsonist, but some cute boy from class? He's not a cute boy from class. He's a danger to society.
You're glad you don't have the opportunity to reply. Your phone is buzzing in your hands, the haptic feedback lighting the neurons in your brain on fire.
→ dabi ; 11:53pm gtg phone is gonna die have fun with ur paper u loser hope u get a good grade or whatever i'll txt u later
You shouldn't have texted Dabi.
But you did.
#burner cell#mha dabi#bnha x reader#bnha dabi#dabi todoroki#dabi x reader#dabi x you#dabi imagine#mha imagine#bnha imagine#touya x reader#touya x y/n#dabi x y/n#this is ridiculously fun i love these two haters
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meet: benjamin 🧡🐱
ben is the reason i have been semi active the past few weeks. he’s the latest addition to my family, and although i technically adopted him, i feel like this situation was really more of a rescue…
i want to preface this whole situation by saying 3 things though
- ben was adopted from a very ill lady
- i did not know that ben might have health issues and was actually told the opposite
- he’s booked into the vets for thursday morning
ok so bens story is a bit of a weird one. i became good friends with the lady who fostered george (my kitten) for the charity who i adopted him and nora from. she’s known that i’ve been on the lookout for another cat, and messaged me as soon as she found out about ben, previously named fluffles.
he was being rehomed for free from a lady who had become too ill to care for him and his brother. her brother adopted bens brother. however, the story didn’t *start* there. apparently back in january of this year, ben, then fluffles, and his brother plus another cat were found in bad conditions on the streets. a neighbour was feeding them and offering them a makeshift shelter in their garden, and the charity took them in as strays. the cat they were with was in such bad condition it had to be put down. when finding out ben and his brother were microchipped, they had to legally return them to the ill owner after a short stint in a foster home.
skip forward to now and the lady realised that she was being neglectful due to her illness and wanted to rehome them. upon meeting them they seemed like lovely people who really cared about the wellbeing of the cats and i hate to think otherwise, however…
the way ben acts is genuinely as if he has never felt love. he seems so grateful for the warmth and safety of our home. he didnt leave his plush bed by the radiator for almost a whole week and needed his food and water brought to him.
he is covered head to toe in scabs. and he spends a lot of time grooming and itching. luckily they flead him before he left with us but my heart breaks feeling all the scabs over his body. they are literally everywhere. we also constantly find skin and fur that he has scratched off, so he is obviously uncomfortable, itchy and probably very sore.
to me, he seems a bit skinny. he isnt eating consistently but he does eat a little bit, and he loves treats. his poops and pees seem fine so hopefully thats just him adjusting to our routine.
the most worrying part for me though is that he has lumps on his belly. we tried to leave him be for a few days before really fussing him as not to overwhelm him, but amazingly it seems like he loves belly rubs! and when he was getting lots this evening, it feels as if his nipple areas have bumps beneath them. i have my fingers crossed that its just the glands that are infected, and will be fixed with antibiotics. i am hoping and praying it isnt cancer. if it is… i dont know what i’ll do. his backside area also looks slightly swollen.
i’m mad because either the family i adopted him from knew about these bumps and didnt tell me, or they just failed to notice them altogether. apparently he visited the vets about 3 months ago. shouldnt they have been picked up on then??
i just hope this is a “simple” case of neglect, and with the right love and care and medication, benny will be okay 🧡 however any advice leading up to his vets appointment is much appreciated!!
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"He is named Mr. Biscuits. But she... she is named Ms. Biscotti."
I have been volunteering at the animal shelter over the last couple of weeks, as part of my court-ordered community service. Before that, I was out on the highway, picking up garbage. Unfortunately for me, I was tempted by a broken-down Chrysler Imperial on the side of the road, and attempted to fix it to help out the owner, and not at all to drive away with it at high speed. This drew the ire of my supervisor, who shot me with a beanbag round.
Sub-lethal ammunition aside, the animal shelter had been treating me quite well. They gave me water and snacks, for instance, and I got to become friends with a grumpy old tabby who would only piss in the box when I was around. Everything was going according to plan, until it happened.
"Here are the new enrichment toys for these cats. Ooh, they look so realistic. Here's a little Toyota Corolla–"
It was clearly a Toyota Corona, but I can see how someone born in this country, and who had failed to be educated about Japanese domestic market shitboxes would miss that. I took a deep breath, lowered my heart rate, and she continued without noticing.
"And I think this one is a VW Beetle. Cute!"
There was absolutely no way that someone could mistake a Fiat 600 for a VW Beetle. Like, come on. This person – my new supervisor – was a secret oppressor placed here by my haters, to attempt to get me to violate my parole conditions. Still, I maintained my composure, drawing on the anger-management skills that had been drilled into my head by a combination of prison group therapy and mood-altering medication. I sat there, crosslegged, and watched a small orange kitten climb into the Corona. This, I assumed, must be Mr. Biscuits.
I fully expected the cat to immediately leap out of the car and continue on his usual kitteny antics of knocking things off shelves, chasing the reflection from my phone screen, and excessively odorous pooping. That didn't happen. Mister Biscuits sat in the drivers seat and seemed to be working the steering wheel and little shifter, his brow furrowed with intent.
Did I tell anyone? No. My volunteer duties were clearly indicated in the contract that I signed when I began work. When Mr. Biscuits stole that Power Wheels a couple years later, and led the entire police department on a high-speed chase after knocking over a pet food store, I wasn't surprised. The community gives back what you give to it.
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stay hopeful for your cat! i thought mine was going to pass at 11 as well but she bounced back and passed at 20 years. stay strong stay strong!!
Due to everyone's help and donations, I have enough money to take Allister back to the vet, and still have some left over to have him euthanized if they deem it necessary, so I'm taking Allister back in today since it seems like he's doing worse. He's been plugged pee-wise for at least two days and that's two too many. They're going to have to manually express his bladder and xray him to see the poop situation
He is continually struggling to eat. I got him to eat last night but this morning, he's more interested in cuddling up in my lap. I can only get him to take tiny baby licks. He's not drinking water besides what he's getting in his food, and I haven't seen him try and even enter the box since Saturday
I just... the vets have to examine him and I have to hear what they say
There's a selfish part of my heart that wants to say "but he might pull through on his own, wait some more" but he's obviously feeling worse than he was last week. He was still eating last week, and that was after being so constipated you could see the blockage under his tail. And again, not peeing is much more serious, and they might be able to fix that by just expressing his bladder. I don't think that would take away his appetite though :(
My biggest fear is like... what if he could recover. What if he's euthanized and he actually would have pulled through if I gave it another day or so. But I need to see the vets before I can have that hope. And also, it's like, "would I be buying him days or years?" And even the vets wouldn't know that for certain. Miracles like what you're talking about happen all the time
Fingers crossed. Today might be the day we have to say good bye to my little furry friend, but I'm trying to keep hope in my heart. I, I have a feeling everything is going to be OK. I just have this feeling that whether today goes good or bad, it's going to be ok.
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6 months!
Old. 6 months old. I've only had her for almost-4-months.
Successes:
No accidents since December 21, and the ones in the 2 weeks prior to that were zoomies-induced
Nice walker, can go on the harness and pull gently or (with lots of reinforcement, but she is 6 months) on the collar and not pull at all
Alone in the car up to 75 minutes at a stretch or at home, crated, with Hazard, up to 2 hours
Sit/down/touch all fairly good
Drop it VERY good, 99% of the time she will spit the item out.
Very nice toy skills! Will drop a toy and wait to hear "take it" (tug) or "geddit" (fetch)
Her dog-dog social skills are insane. She is so good at adapting play to different confidence levels, or backing off entirely if the other dog is uninterested. She can navigate weird personal conflicts (like when a BC bitch decided to resource guard me) with ease and draw shy dogs into play. If this holds true, she's going to be an exceptional dog for socializing others.
Work in progress:
She can sleep through the night but only if (a) minimal food in the 2 hours before bed and (b) she poops right before bed. Otherwise we get up around 3 am to poop. This past week she's also had a streak where she decides there's Monsters outside and needs to huff about it. That's been steadily decreasing but we're still working on getting the poop schedule right.
We've graduated from the no-spill bowl. MOSTLY she doesn't go swimming in the water bowl, unless she's overtired in which case all bets are off.
Recall is uh, extant. Usually. Which is very good for 6 months lol
Evening relaxing remains something we need to actively remind her to do. I'm typing this post in the bedroom with her, because she won't wind down most nights in the living room--and she won't usually put herself in the bedroom to sleep. So someone goes into the bedroom with her, closes the door, and just hangs out for the last 1-2 hrs before bed, and that's working okay.
She's not as people-friendly as I (after all of Hazard's issues) would like. She's EAGER to meet people but not eager for them to meet her, head-shy, will flinch away from strangers. Like Hazard once you're in her circle you're in, and you can do whatever, and it's a lot easier to get in her circle, but hmm. More love on this I think.
Cat skills: She LOVELOVELOVES the cat. Penny even loves her back. But if Penny is in an accessible place (ie, 95% of the apartment) K'seil is incessant about bothering her, unless being actively distracted.
Leave it/trash is like, she Wants A Thing In Her Mouth on walks sometimes. So she'll dive at trash and shove it in her mouth--not EAT it, rarely even CHEW it, just Hold In Mouth. Which is why her 'drop it' is so stellar. 95% of the time she'll leave it if I can get the cue out, but the reason this is a WIP is she needs the cue. She doesn't have any sort of default "oh I should ignore this" yet. This goes double for certain trash bins in the apartment--thus far no thefts of anything dangerous, but she likes to chew apart masks and eat clumps of shed hair. I know how to fix this I just haven't put the work in.
Counter surfing is juuuust about a success but I don't wanna jinx it XD Very early on she was very persistent about trying to put feet on the kitchen counter, and through consistently ignoring/redirecting her from that and rewarding a down in the kitchen, we have gone...like a week or so? Without any attempts to get on the counter. So that's very nice, both because I hate counter surfing and because it validates my R+ approach.
Bite inhibition/mouthing I think is a WIP but might be a success, she's still Very Sharp sometimes but that's also when she's aroused, so we might just be having arousal problems (because she is 6 months). On walks about 75% of the time she can take a treat from my fingertips perfectly gently. She's still very mouthy, including with new people which is Ungreat, but it's steadily improving.
Body handling, while SO much better than Hazard, still needs some love. She'll let me brush the dremel against her nails but not hold it there, and rear nails have been a no-go since I quicked her fairly badly there. Brushing is 50/50.
Yikes:
Dogs in complex. She's not really reactive beyond staring at dogs outside the apartment complex, but inside it (how does she know. why does she know.) she is loudly and quickly vocal about There Is A Dog Over There. Think husky noises. We're making progress on this but it is still deeply embarassing.
Home alone without Hazard. I haven't done as much work on this as I should, because she can be in the car alone for an hour, so if he's got a class I can just bring her. But it would be nice. Sigh.
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hi! im thinking about getting rats, is there any advice you could give?
You wanna get more than 1 they need friends for a healthy life.
Girls are more playful and rambunctious than boys, boys are more laid back and chill.
Girls I recommend getting spayed because of their high chance of getting mammary and uterine tumors/cancer. It has to be done less than 5-6 months of age or it won't really help. Boys can get mammary and testicular tumors but it is not as common.
this cage can hold 3, this 5, this 10. When its time to clean I like to use dilute chlorhex. (the link is concentrated, dilute 1-2 capfuls in 16 oz water sprayer.)
for bedding i use a layer of cotton fabric under a layer of fleece, the fleece is soft for their feet and the cotton's absorbable. Then they have hammocks and castles and i use extra cut up fleece as little blankets to put in them.
For food I use oxbow rat food, (there are smaller bags) which can generally be free-fed but sometimes you can get one who eats too much so you have do do maintenance for them. That is their weight in grams divided by 100 times 5. that number would be the amount of oxbow crackers in grams they get a day, which can be split into two feedings. If they need to lose weight just cut the final number in half and feed them that for a couple weeks before going back to maintenance.
They can have most fruits and veggies. for treats i don't use rat treats because they tend to have too much sugar, I just use baby food, so like the mush or puffs just things without too much sugar or sodium. They can't digest lactose very well so little to no dairy products
pretty much any oxbow toy is fine for them, I will also use bird toys with the paper they can shred.
They can be potty trained, I've only been able to get mine to poop in their litter boxes but not pee yet. Just pick up the poops and put them in the box they eventually get the hang of it. I use this potty and this litter. An air purifier is a good thing to have around too, make sure they don't get to the wires.
I do let mine free roam my room when i'm in it, they have cat trees to climb on but the room has to be rat proofed. they will chew on everything, cords, carpet, walls, gotta be prepared to have a few things ruined. they will climb everything to get to a place they haven't been so you have to watch for that. also any little places they might be able to squeeze into. I have a heavy carpet under my door 'cause they can squeeze under and that thing is torn up so much.
Health wise respiratory infections are gonna be your main one, they can get sprains just from climbing and being curious. tumors: mammary, uterine, testicular can all be removed. lung and pituitary cannot. ear infections are rare but can happen those need to be taken care of fast bc they can quickly eat through to the brain an kill the rat. With them chewing on things they're not supposed to they can get abscesses which can resolve on their own, but they can also displace the jaw if they're bad enough and then cause tooth issues, and since their incisors are always growing that may mean frequent tooth trims.
But I think that's about all I got right now.
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I took this photo of my boy, Miguel, this morning at 6:45am. I knew this would be the last morning I would have waking up with him. He has always slept in my bed and I have always woken up to him nearby. Every single day for the past 15 years and 9 months. And now I have to go to sleep without him near my face or on my back. Not even under my blankets with me. And I will wake up without him. No weight on my legs or meowing for breakfast.
I mostly fear that moment tomorrow morning when I first wake up and I still believe he is here. It’s going to hurt. It’s going to hurt so fucking much because in that moment I will be happy again. But it will come and go so fast. I almost want to believe that maybe if I do believe strongly enough, if I can trick myself enough into truly believing he is still here and just in the other room, then maybe the universe will realize its mistake. ‘That person believes their cat is still alive so it must be true! We must have made a mistake!’ And the universe will plop Miguel back into my arms, healthy and alive and purring. I wish it worked like that.
I miss him so much. And the thing is, I’ve been missing him. He’s been a little down for a while now. But it got worse around September 15th and by the 20th, he wasn’t eating and was stumbling around. Falling and getting cold. I was so fucking scared. I cried into his fur, telling him over and over “I’m not ready. Please don’t break my heart. I’m not ready.”
We got him to a vet and he was extremely anemic. They could barely draw blood. But all the tests came back negative. The only thing they couldn’t test for at the time was cancer. They gave him a bunch of medicine and we took him home. We bought him joint meds and iron supplements and senior cat food and treats. Some high calorie snacks to help him gain weight. And he was better for a while. He finally ate some kibble! Which he hadn’t eaten in years. He had completely switched to wet food.
So Miguel was eating kibble and drinking water and taking his meds and doing good. He got to see my daughter turn 9 years old. He got to see my sister’s kids one last time. Because they had recently moved away but unexpectedly dropped by just a few days ago. But this past week he got bad again. Doing the same stuff he was before. Not eating. Drinking lots of water. And, I failed to mention, but while he was eating and ‘getting better’ he was having trouble with leaking poop.
It was hard but this whole week, and really the whole extra month we had with him, I’ve been thinking real hard on his whole situation.
Love hurts. It fucking hurts. Because all love comes with suffering. I must suffer because I love him and I didn’t want to force him to stay alive just to avoid the pain of being without him. So I made the choice today, after having him by my side all last night, to euthanize him.
I had him stay in my bed one last time. I didn’t care if he made the bed messy. I have a washing machine. I just needed him to know that I love him and that I was going to take care of him. And I think he knew. He kept rubbing his head against me and I petted him all night. Talked to him. Told him everything that was on my mind and how I’m still not ready, not 100 percent ready, but no one ever is and I wasn’t going to have him go another day and night with an empty belly, falling down everywhere. I thanked him for the extra month. That it really helped me get ready. And that he can go play with Molly now. (My daughter’s kitten that died back in January of this year)
I made him a sweater. Hand knitted it. He always loved wearing clothes. It was a beautiful, warm day. A perfect last day. Miguel’s last meal was on Friday. It was a pork street taco for our local Mexican restaurant. I always get the pork ones on Friday because they are on sale. I always order an extra one for him. I’m glad he got to eat that. That he had the energy to eat that day. The extra month I had him, he got to eat all of his favorite foods. Spaghetti, pork tacos, turkey, pepperoni, bacon, ham. My boy loved ham. And anytime we ordered a bacon cheeseburger he would come over, begging for a bit of bacon. His favorite snack was pepperoni slices. Second favorite snack was strips of ham or turkey lunch meat.
I’m going to share some pictures of my boy now.
And I apologize for this long, sad post. Especially since I haven’t been around Tumblr for a long while. I’ve been with him. My boy. My Miguel.
#he kept looking at me with these eyes all last night#I think he knew because those eyes felt like he was begging me for something but not for food or a snack#I just kept telling myself all this month that ‘when you don’t know what to do you do what you can’#my boy is gone. and idk what to do now#I have 3 other cats to care for and of course they will feel Miguel’s absence#he was their father in a way. he raised them#im so broken#I knew he would die one day especially when he started getting older and older#I always referred to it as ‘the day he breaks my heart’#but I’m calling it ‘the day he went to play’ now because he didn’t break my heart#he would never#and he didn’t want to#he kept trying to walk and stand and be a cat but it wasn’t working and he wasn’t going to get better and I could let him hurt like that#it very likely was cancer which means he was hurting even if he didn’t let me know#my cat#my Miguel#my boi#personal#tw pet death#tw pet loss
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Reminder with it being Easter this week, rabbits make TERRIBLE Easter presents. They require sooooo much work to keep happy and healthy and need to be spay/neutered just like a cat or dog. Doing so literally can triple their lifespan.
They need toys and cuddles and play for long amounts of time.
If you pick them up wrong they will break their own back and die.
If you give them a bath their thick coats could trap water and they get hypothermia and die.
If it gets slightly too scared it will have a heart attack...and die.
Only specialty vets see rabbits as they're considered "exotics". That means A) more expensive vet bills B)limited options, especially for ER care C) going to the vet can stress them out so much they just die.
NO ONE TOLD ME RABBITS MOLT. Every year I'm brushing multiple rabbits worth of fur from my bunny. And it's a battle cause he doesn't like being held.
Lots of people get them because they want a cute "short term pet" that doesn't take up space. The amount of space they need to stay healthy is pretty much an entire living room. When Noiz was younger we just let him have run of the apartment or bedroom.
They need hay like horses. Like, A LOT of hay. Noiz could go through a bundle the size of him in 2ish days. They need it to poop.
BTW, rabbits poop like 300 times a day :) they might be little, but they will also throw them around as a way to mark their territory.
And don't get me started on the short term. This boy has been living via spite for the world for almost 10 years now. I love him soooo much, but I knew what I was getting into when we got him and it is still a lot.
Just get your family a stuffed bunny or take them to a petting zoo to meet rabbits. They're cheaper and you won't have an actual immortal demon living in your house who will thump till you give him papaya bits.
Every year a few weeks after Easter shelters get flooded with bunnies bought as presents for kids/families who aren't prepared for how much they actually need to thrive.
Happy Easter everyone! Eat lots of chocolate bunnies, find eggs, and do whatever else. Just don't get a rabbit unless you do your research.
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This week is about Yeon ~. Our new adopted home kitty...🐈..Honestly I've never expected a random kitten walked in our living room, wondering around the house while asking for food, AGAIN... This has happened before and it still happen again. Cats/Dogs are sustenance to us if we feed them with food/water or offer some kitty/doggie snacks.
I adopted this small kitty name Yeon~ from a Korean Drama about a nine-tailed fox. You know, Lee Dong-wook? Yup. He is one of my favourite actor in K-dramas. He's getting more handsome in his early 40's and my boyfie looks like him. 😆😆😆 Love you bae~
3 weeks ago on Sunday night, a lost kitten appeared in front of the garbage bin, found him seating quietly beneath the grass. My mom was outside collecting dry clothes and saw a lonely kitten and asked him to come in. The little fella walked in, followed my mom until it enters the living room. Dad surprised as he saw an orange cat (exactly like how my previous Oyen when he was just a kitten) slowly strolling around the living room. The kitten looked lost, a small dirt found on his tiny pink nose, his tiny beans looks like tiny white socks but softer. He has a beaitful feature for an orange species. His big round cute black-orange eyes smirking at me. I was at the kitchen with my sister after we had dinner and we went to the kitten. He was curious about the surrounding, trying to figure out what's happening and where is this place.
I walked to him and used my left palm to carry him as his small innocent dreamy eyes staring at me. He had tiny male balls behind (oh~ a male ah?) with a clean butt.... Are you Oyen's kid? Are you from somewhere else? Did your previous owner abandoned you? While observing his body, I noticed his long fur, dark orange and white, a 2 blended colors just like a typical orange cat. His face looks tired and confused. Immediately I looked for the late Oyen's food to feed him. He followed us to the kitchen and ate the Royal Canin. Once he finished his food, he began to start his small journey around the house. He started to climbed up to the washing machine, a few minutes later, he went to the toilet, pooping on the floor sink and left us to clean it up (Walaoeh, how clever this kitten? Did his previous owner taught him this?) and then he start to follow us whenever we go. My dad kept asking him if he was Oyen's son due to the familiar attitude as Oyen. Our Oyen has gone missing since last July 2023 and yet to returned until today.
My mom assured that this kitten must be abandon by the previous owner due to his active stage or perhaps he was left alone accidentally from the house. I examined his body once again to confirm if he is free from any symptoms of cat's illness/disease. Fortunately, his fur not coming out or sticked to our shirts when we hold him and his fur is healthy, beautifully groomed. He must have been self-grooming all the time after a meal or something. His attitude is similar to Oyen, except that he was so polite to pooping at the toilet's floor sink. What a gentlemen this little kitty. Even Momochan still pooping in the cage unexpectedly. (Momochan is still no.1 in our family). I am getting worried when Momo is aging since she has been laying down in the cage and sleeps a lot.
His meow? - a soft tone, unlike a lion's roar. He crawls and sniffing to my hand, bite my leg and rubbed his small body against my ankle seeking for warm and love. What a tiny cute baby.
What a wonderful little child. This orange kitten needs lots of love since he was previously left alone. Up until now, I have no clue how this tiny beautiful kitten was found outside of our house gate. On Monday evening after work, I go to SpeedMart to buy a few wet food and dry food for Yeon. The next plan is to buy Royal Canin dry food to maintain his diet and health...Emmm, how did he survived outdoors alone? How did he find food/drinks and shelter? All this kept running in my mind and I still yet to give him a name.
Kobe?
Haru?
Haku? (Like Jun's Kitchen cat, Haku...)
Oden?
Yeon? - my dream cat's name.
At first, I decided to call him Kobe (Koh-Bee) but my sister mocking me "Kobe Beef ~ Kobe Beef~".😂 Lama-lama nanti I fikir dia daging lembu pula...Boyfie said Kobe is a nice name just like the late basketball player Kobe Bryant. I answered, "Kobe Broyen" and he 😆😆😆. Lol ~ My mom was even funnier when it comes to name cats. She randomly dropped "Snack" as his name. Melissa likes the name "Snack" due to his orange cat personality. Mom has been asking how the kitten walked in randomly to us? My dad said" You asked for Oyen. And now, he sent another one to you". 😂😂😂😂 But, actually it might be true...😳
On Saturday morning (Before the night Yeon came to our house which is on Sunday night.), I can't remember if is the day we went for morning market with mom to look for lamb/chicken for monthly stock or the time mom asked to accompany me to helped pump air for all tyres and pump petrol for her car. But what I know is...While on the way back, Mom did mentioned she missed our late Oyen and I said yeah, me too (Sometimes, when I can't sleep or stressed from a restless mind, I sobbed whenever I saw his photos/videos from my phone before sleep. I still have doubts of Oyen's whereabouts and can't accept if he is really gone...By the time Oyen has left, I felt like a small hole is cracked open from my heart. It never felt content whenever Oyen is not with us...). I did not tell this part of the story to my mom because it was at my fault for late sending him to the vet when he is in heavy-swollen stage in his mouth. I am late for making the next move and I am regret for not sending him to the vet early. 😢😭😭😭I'm sorry boy. Please forgive me as you are the greatest creation from God. I even told my boyfie that Oyen is the most handsome cat I had ever seen in my eyes and I failed to take care of him as a cat owner. I have so many things to learn as a cat owner and I regret for unable to rectify my mistakes.
And then on Sunday night. Yeon came~
Just like that.
Dad insisted Yeon suddenly came to us as if he was fallen by the sky (Like the Mr. Bean live-action series) and still wondering how Yeon came to our house...
"Mungkin langit atas hantar Si Kecik ni datang ke rumah kita untuk duduk"...
God: You! The orange one.
Yeon: Yes sir!
God: I command that you to go house number XXX tonight.
Yeon: Sir, yes sir!
God: Maksure they took you in with warm and love.
Yeon: Alright sir!
God: Go now!
Yeon: Thank you sir!
*Imagination story by my dad 👆....😂😂😂😂😆😆😆
Regarding the how I come up with the name Yeon? I played the name for a while and "Kobe" doesn't seem works on him as it reminds me of food. Beef Meat. Beef Meat. How can I live with this name at home right? Oden is food while Haku and Haru is not suitable much. Yeon was the name me and boyfie discussed about our future cats name and it was the name given by myself. Initially is Lee-yeon, but I decided to go with Yeon instead. Ala-ala kucing Korea~ (Oyenchan is a Japanese name).
Boyfie informed me to take good care of him and make him a house-cat instead of stray. I will follow my plan and make sure Yeon is well fed, healthy full with warm and love.
Thank you so much God AL-Mighty. 💝
Kucing is rezeki.
Alhamdulillah💓💝x
So grateful to welcome our new orange kitten, Yeon ~... 😍
May all affairs be simplified smoothly~
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Highly recommend this writing exercise for anyone with original characters: Come up with the contents of their bag. An author visited my workplace recently and this was her tip, so I gave it a shot. It really helps with writer's block, and it helps you get to know your lil' guys a little bit. (I also added phones because that is another great glimpse into the person.)
Sam
The bag: A square, black backpack with a Lord of the Rings keychain and a space needle pin on it. The straps are a little frayed because she has been using it since high school. It’s very practical and spacious.
Inside the bag
Emotional support water bottle
Laptop (covered in various stickers)
A pile of discarded/forgotten elastic headbands
Notebook filled with DM scrawlings
At least one book at all times
Wallet with keys attached
Phone: iPhone (a couple generations old) from high school, cracked screen, yellowed clear phone case with a couple stickers stuck inside. Both the home screen and lock screen wallpaper are the Eye of Sauron.
Link
The bag: A generic gray backpack with an Adventure Zone lanyard with keys and his wallet clipped onto the outside in a little card holder.
Inside the bag
Work laptop (it’s sort of a brick, old and thick, but it runs numbers well)
Switch (in case he gets bored at work)
Personal laptop
Creased up old comic book
Glasses case w/ wipe
A bottle of coke that he’s been working on for a week
Phone: An older iPhone in an opaque red phone case with black D20 phone grip. His home screen wallpaper is a picture of him and his dad at his sister’s quinceañera, and the lock screen is a picture of his dad’s EMS dog Mariposa.
Aria
The bag: A very big tote bag (pink).
Inside the bag
Collapsible wireless headphones (pink)
Nail kit for emergencies (including file, clippers, clear polish, etc.) (pink)
Hairbrush (pink)
Tinted sunscreen (pink, somehow)
Cat shaped wallet (pink)
An unacceptably heavy chemistry textbook (not pink)
Phone: The newest iPhone (she saved up for it) in a (pink) sparkly case. Her lock screen is a picture of the best smoothie she ever had in her life and her home screen is a selfie of her and Sam on a hike.
Chris
The bag: An army green satchel bag absolutely covered in pins and buttons (including, but not limited to, a Green Day button, a pan flag button, a trans flag button, one that says, “Screw you I’m hilarious,” and various other ones with cheeky little phrases).
Inside the bag
A journal stuffed full of receipts and scribbles that they use to keep track of store inventory and purchases. (They log everything into a computer too, but they like having a physical copy on them in case their internet or computer poops out.)
Folgers instant coffee (travel sized packets)
Pocket knife
An absolutely fat ring of keys on a Dark Crystal lanyard
Big sunglasses (stolen from their mom when they moved out halfway through high school)
A leather pouch with a clasp instead of a wallet (filled with loose cash, change, and one card)
Phone: They never upgraded to a smartphone, so they have the same flip phone they had in middle school. The wallpaper is a very unflattering picture of Link that they took after he fell asleep on the couch during a sleepover. They also have an iPhone for work, but it only supports the internet so that they can post about their tabletop store “The Do’s and Don’ts of Dice” on Instagram.
#what's in my bag#writing#original writing#my writing#creative writing#book#books#author#writer#author things#novel writing#writing exercise#original character#original characters
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Valicer Polyship Week, Day Two: Huddling For Warmth (Valicer In The Dark AU)
Day Two of Valicer Polyship Week, courtesy of @polyshipweek, and we’re up to the first of a pair of Valicer In The Dark AU fics! This is the verse where Victor, Alice, and Smiler are a crew in the Blades in the Dark setting of Duskwall, having been brought together by Alice and Smiler trying to help Victor with his “ghost bride” problem, only to find themselves and him accused of murder after said ghost bride takes out her killer. So they just kind of embraced being criminals and set themselves up in a lair, ready to do at least vaguely Robin-Hood-ish crimes (and sell drugs, in Smiler’s case). The problem is, said lair (a version of Elder Gutknecht’s tower from Corpse Bride) isn’t exactly in the best repair at the time of this story, meaning that keeping warm on a chilly, drafty night is a bit of a problem. . .good thing I let them have my nice big purple blanket to keep themselves warm. XD Enjoy!
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“Ugh. . .why is it always so cold in here?”
“Well, you not having an ounce of body fat on you cannot help.”
Victor shot Alice a look. “I can’t help that. It’s true of everyone on my father’s side.”
“It wasn’t a judgment, just an observation,” Alice told him, tucking in the side of the blanket they were sharing a little more tightly around herself. “I think it’s safe to say the real culprit is every crack and chip in this old wreck of a house that lets in the breeze.”
“It’s not as bad as it was when we first moved in,” Smiler offered up from Victor’s other side, as usual looking on the bright side of things. “Once we got the glass in the windows again, things warmed up a lot!”
“Define ‘a lot,’” Victor groused, snuggling deeper into the soft purple cloth swaddled around the three of them. Yes, making sure to grab this before we fled my parents’ house was my best idea yet. “I don’t suppose you’ve got any brilliant ideas for a new kind of heater?” His eyes flicked to Alice. “One that doesn’t rely on open flame?”
“We can light the fireplace,” Alice said, though her tone was reluctant. “I can get over myself when it comes to avoiding losing some digits to frostbite.”
“No, we saw your face when we tried lighting it the first time – I’m not going to be the one to plunge you back into bad memories,” Smiler said firmly. “Besides, it doesn’t work very well, and we don’t have a good way to clean it, so. . .” They snuggled up against Victor. “What sort of heater do you want? Like the radiators your parents had in their mansion?”
“Ideally. . .though I guess that means we have to figure out running water first,” Victor admitted, frowning.
“Hey, I don’t mind turning my talents to plumbing! We need to do something about the bathroom anyway.”
“Other than toss the refuse down the nearest street drain?” Alice remarked blandly.
“That would be nice – unless there’s a mushroom farm down there,” Smiler said, sitting up straight. “We should check, actually – I bet you some lord or other set up something before the place went to ruin. And even if there’s not, we could set one up – who’s gonna check the tunnels here in Six Towers? We can get a few samples from my parents and see what grows!”
“That’s not a bad idea,” Victor admitted, before reaching out and pulling Smiler back in against him. “But let’s save it for a less-cold evening, shall we?”
“I’m in favor of that – even if squelching through our own poop would be pretty warm,” Alice said with her best Cheshire Cat grin.
Victor made a face at her. “You’re disgusting.”
Alice laid her head on his shoulder, blinking up at him. “And yet you haven’t kicked me out of the huddle.”
“Yes, well, you’re warm too.” Victor slipped his arm around her. “I love you. Both of you. And not just because you’re warm.”
“And we love you,” Smiler said, kissing his cheek. “And not just because you’re warm, because that would be a lie. Seriously, how is it you never gain an ounce no matter what you eat?”
“I don’t know! And I’m not about to summon up the ghosts of my ancestors to ask, so don’t mention it.”
“Aww. . .”
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#valicer polyship week#PolyshipWeek23#valicer#fanfic#valicer in the dark au#huddling for warmth#victor van dort#alice liddell#smiler alton#the smiler#corpse bride#American McGee's Alice#yes as you might imagine it was kinda chilly when I wrote this XD#and yes I own that big purple blanket they're all cuddling in#it's really good for keeping warm in winter#as they're finding out :p#and yes sewer mushroom farms are a thing in Duskwall#mushrooms are one of the key foodstuffs in a world where the sun got shattered into mere embers 800 years ago#and yes this was inspired by my Gutknecht Bend build from a little while ago#I still kind of want to make a wrecked version of it#and maybe use it for a challenge save#where I make Victor Alice and Smiler as their Valicer In The Dark selves#have them move into it using the Makin' Money scenario#and then have to make bank and fix up the house without getting 'real' jobs#maybe one day!#if and when things calm down a bit in my supposedly 'lazy save' XD#queued
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My therapist said a term I'd never heard yesterday: Window of Tolerance. I realized yesterday that I stay in the orange to red and have for... ever. 😬 Then, like the last several weeks, my body has been screaming that I'm creeping into the blue. How do I know? Sounds that normally aren't a bother, like my cat's water fountain trickling, grate on my nerves. Lately, it's been smells. Mould. Cat poop (despite no food changes), cow manure (my parents live near a cow farm and it NEVER bothers me), cigarette smoke (as a former smoker, it's never been an issue), bleach (!) now makes me gag, vinegar (a formerly sought out scent) burns. My senses are so skewed. It exhausts me to my bones. I need it quiet. I need things unscented. I need soft materials on my skin and paws. What do you find yourself needing when you're overwhelmed? (Graphic uncredited because I couldn't find a source. Will credit when I find it.)
#mental health#mental illness#mental heath support#window of tolerance#im overwhelmed#how are you doing today#i love you
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Eclipse, notices the cat's litterboxes for the first time: what are these for?
Callie: The cats and JUST the cats
OH MAN
~~~~~
Eclipse watched from around the corner as Bloom entered the little box in the laundry room. She shuffled around in the little gritty rocks inside for a few seconds, before turning and sitting still. A smell hit his nose then. Instantly recognizable.
Once done with her business, Bloom turned and scraped at the grit once more, and the smell faded slightly. Then the cat hopped out of the box and trotted away.
The darkling approached the little container, curious. It was a kind of bathroom, one that only the cats were allowed to use. His mom said so. But that didn't seem fair. The room she had said he needed to use to relieve himself was big and bright and just seemed too . . . open. It made him a little uncomfortable.
But these boxes? Small and enclosed. Kind of cozy, really. They were a bit small, but if he really tried, he bet he could fit.
Eclipse took another few steps toward the box, when a pair of hands appeared around his middle and lifted him. He turned, hissing at the woman who'd become his mom, who gave him a raised eyebrow.
"Those are just for the cats," she said, her voice stern. "You wouldn't fit anyway. You're too big."
The darkling scowled. "Then get bigger boxes!"
"I am NOT going to buy bigger litter boxes for you to do your business in," she said, walking him to the bathroom. "What's wrong with this bathroom?"
"It's too big! I feel like something could attack me at any moment!"
"What's going to attack you in the bathroom??"
"I don't know, I'm too busy trying not to fall into that big bowl to see!"
Callie rolled her eyes, plopping him on his feet in front of the toilet. "Is that the real problem? You're worried about falling in?"
Eclipse's face pinched in annoyance, and he crossed his arms. "Maybe."
"For crying out loud," she muttered, opening the cabinet beneath the sink and pulling out a round, padded seat. "I thought Silver showed you. Put this on when you have to go. It'll keep you from falling in."
She placed the little seat on top of the white bowl and picked him up to sit on it. At first the darkling tensed, but quickly relaxed when he sat more comfortably, without any danger of falling into the water inside.
"Better?" she asked, head tilted slightly as she gave him a little smile.
The darkling gave a little shimmy on the seat, feeling adequately confident of his safety. He nodded.
"Good. If I catch you sneaking into the litter boxes again, you're on dish duty for a week." She bent forward, coming nose-to-muzzle with the boy. "And I'll know if you've been in them. Darkling poop is much different than cat poop."
Eclipse ducked his head. "Fine."
~~~~~
YOU'VE READ IT, YOU CAN'T UNREAD IT.
I'm probably the first writer to touch on Eclipse's pooping habits. I feel such a strange mixture of pride and shame.
Like this? Check out my other shorties. Reblogs are appreciated!
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Wrote a little thing last night on my phone because I keep thinking about it. What if I shoved all my sad feelings about the bunny dying into Stede and made it a meetcute in the end, as one does? Everything is an AU, blah blah blah.
Under a cut for pet death, depression thoughts.
Stede hadn't expected Arthur to die.
The funny little guy with the soft face and floppy ears left poop on the floor and a hole in Stede's heart.
He wasn't even sure about getting a rabbit in the first place. Always figured he was more of a cat guy, maybe, except Mary was allergic so they never had one. Then the divorce, and then the kids pleading for a pet, and then the shelter event at the pet store where the most beautiful man he'd ever seen showed him how to handle a bunny, gentle and easy as anything. Told him about a Facebook group that was good for questions and congratulated Arthur on finding his forever home.
So he'd brought Arthur back to his two bedroom apartment and given him run of the place. Coaxed him to jump up on the couch for cuddles and treats. Got used to the little guy being underfoot, especially in the kitchen. Stede found himself eating more green vegetables just because he could share. Habits that became ingrained over time.
The rabbit was for the kids, sure, but Stede was Arthur's human. He had never really been anyone's human, not really, so Arthur occupied a very special place in Stede's heart.
And then, one morning, Arthur didn't want to eat breakfast. Not even pellets or treats. Stede brought him to the vet, gave all the meds he was prescribed, paid for the tests he was told to get, and then…
Well. No one to appreciate his kale stems and strawberry tops anymore. No one to look out for under the desk chair. No one to appear at 7 o'clock on the dot, eyes shining, to remind him about dinner.
The kids were sad, of course. And his friends were kind. No one made him feel bad about mourning something as silly as a pet bunny. (He'd excised anyone who might've ages ago, around the same time as the divorce.)
Thing was, Stede had been sad and lonely for a while. Arthur was good company, a reason to get up in the morning, but his loss felt bigger than that. And yet, he felt it in all the little ways, the crevices of his day, the way he didn't have to check a water dish or close a door at night. All the small ways he'd made space in his life for the love of a tiny creature. Like it was the last good thing in his daily life to go.
The mourning held so much more than that one loss. But it was the part that anyone else understood.
It took him weeks to clean out all of Arthur's stuff, all the little oops stains and fur piles and scattered hay. Part of it was just feeling tired. Part of it was wanting to feel that wave of sadness and loss from seeing the mess left behind, just a little longer.
Eventually he decided it was time to try again. No bunny could be Arthur, he was certain, but he could make new friends. Probably.
He spent time on the website of the local rescue that he'd adopted Arthur from, sent a few emails about different bunnies, and made plans to visit an adoption event to meet a few.
There, sitting in a pen with a fuzzy gray thing with jet-black ears, was him. The beautiful man who helped him find Arthur.
"I'm here for the adoption event?" he said timidly. He wasn't even looking at the rabbits, all sitting in their little pens kitted out with colorful blankets.
The man set down the rabbit and stood up. "Great," he said, brushing some of the fur off his shirt (but not all, never all). "I'm Ed, who are you here to meet?"
Stede swallowed. You, he thought.
#my stuff#ofmd fanfic#not sure i can write a more self-inserty stede if i try#cw pet loss#written at night and not edited at all#so 🤷#just putting it somewhere so maybe i can stop thinking about it
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Visit
Thank you for your visit on the night of June 3rd, 211 days… I wonder if that’s significant. I’m so grateful that you could find us after the move. I was so worried. I love you.
The dreams was so mundane but… I would take any old mundane over the harsh reality that you’re gone. I was always so jealous that you went to see Mama so many times. Maybe she needed it more? To ground her in this reality and to verify that what we did was the right thing to do… I just chalked it up to the fact that I wasn’t ready. That maybe… maybe you didn’t visit me to save me more despair. But after we fully moved in… not even a full week afterwards, you came to tell me you found me. I miss you my sweet boy. I still cry from time to time, but don’t worry. It’s just because of how much I love you. I hope you’re doing well, making friends, updating your uncle about his two daughters maybe, eating roast pork and grilled cheese, chasing all the squirrels. Maybe you even caught up to them and made them into your buddies.
Ever since you came here, I noticed that my thoughts of you aren’t as painful. Like I said… I still cry but my refractory time is longer. We all miss you. Mama’s thinking about getting another puppy. If we do, it’s not to replace you okay? It’s so that your sister is not so lonely. She’s growing up so fast. I wish that I could have loved you the right way from the beginning. I wish I could have shown you how good I can be. I’m sorry my sweet boy. We love you and we’ll never not think of you fondly and of how much you did for our little family. See you soon okay? Don’t be a stranger. But have fun and enjoy yourself.
My first dream with him after it happened, on June 3rd, 2023
I was traveling to South Korea but it seemed like Los Angeles. I was with some family at my old apartment. Boomer and Luna were doing pretty well. Not like when he was young but definitely before syringing him food and water. We were all joking about stuff like everything was normal. I walked Boo and he was still pulling on the leash like he was looking for a squirrel. Later he was sleeping and then he woke up to immediately poop so I just held my hands under his butt and carried it over to the toilet. There were some red blotches in the poop so I asked you if someone could check if it was blood. I flushed it. And I felt the urge to tell my grad schoolmates that he made a full recovery. That 11/4 never happened and he was all good so far.
Postscript.
As I was showering.. flashes came into my mind of all the little moments I wish we could have had. Running around us while we’re taking care of the lawn. Playing tag with your sister. Using the turf (who am I kidding, you wouldn’t have used it lol). Running up and down the halls when you hear crinkling plastic. Sun bathing in the living rooms (if your sister hadn’t marked it yet). Sitting in the restroom with us. Chasing the squirrels around. Getting scared by/scaring the neighborhood cats. Taking a walk to your favorite auntie’s house.
But then I have to live with the reality that if you were still here… you wouldn’t be able to enjoy any of it. Mama would have been VERY overworked. And very tired.
Then… I think about all the what-ifs…
What if we caught it sooner?
What if I was compliant with the medication for you?
What if we opted for the surgery?
What if I went to school earlier?
What if I decided to stay home and take care of you?
What if I helped out more at the wedding?
What if we didn’t stall on getting the venue?
What if I proposed earlier?
What if we started looking for a house earlier?
What if we saved more aggressively?
What if…?
What if.
The only thing I can sit in comfort knowing is that we spared no expense and we focused on your comfort (maybe less so in the end, but we were sleep deprived and weren’t ready to say our goodbyes… sorry =\)
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Day 92: Sunday April 2, 2023 - “Pool Boy”
Yesterday we got into the pool for the first time and it was pretty rough (not just because he pooped) - he wanted nothing to do with any of it after a few weeks doing ISR classwork. I had some work to do to earn his trust. But today it was so nice out, perfect Tucson Spring Day, and after a really long resftul nap, maybe the afternoon sun wouldn’t be so bad. I felt we needed a really fun pool day together and for him to enjoy that. So rather than forcing it, I let him play outside naked for a bit, then added the swim shirt. Then I came out and sat with him, until he showed interest in the pool (or at least the kitty in the pool) and then made it his idea. “You want to get in the pool?” Yea! “Oh great I’ll get my suit on. Do you want to put on your swim diaper?” Yea! And just like that, with no tears or fighting, he stepped into his little swim diaper and marched off into the pool. While we were in the pool yesterday, it was really not much fun - today was William’s first real day of summer.
He soaked in his cloud, played with the duck, facetimed with Mama, and chased the cat. The water was cold but it didn’t phase him at all. The highlight of all was when I asked if he wanted me to do a cannonball. “Can Nan Ball” he says back. And so I do a HUGE cannonball into the cold deep end of the pool. He cries. He didn’t like that. With enthusiasm I ask “do you want me to go to that again?” Nope! “Do you want to do a cannonball? Yep!” Wow! really? And he marched to the far end of the pool - threw his hand in the air and yelled “Cannon Ball!” Smiled, and then indicated it was time to go watch baseball. Well played little pool boy.
William was so good and cooperative and affection all day today. It was just a great day for Dad and Son. Not just for the time together in the pool, but also sweet moments like cuddling during nap, walking Havarti, eating my cheese eggies, but only if out of my hand, riding the slides at WildKatz. Just a sweet happy boy, and I worked my plan well these past two days, getting a lot out of this time and being so mindful about everything. Its been great to check in with Audrie and share nothing but happy proud moments, and fun pictures, and loving stories. And while we did have to have a couple “no biting” timeouts yesterday, today was nothing but kisses, hugs, and cuddles. Our bond feels really good right now and coaching this little man does feel to be coming very natural.
Song: The National - Eucalyptus
Quote: “Poetry isn’t an island, it is the bridge. Poetry isn’t a ship, it is the lifeboat. Poetry isn’t swimming. Poetry is water.” ― Kamand Kojouri
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