#I have another anxious attack of “this character doesn't look like himself”

[chizups]

Sketch to paint later. Gonna put some song lyrics on about peace and quiet in the head.

[sink-me-in-your-ocean]

𝔊𝔥𝔬𝔲𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔥 ℌ𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔠𝔞𝔫𝔬𝔫𝔰 III

What would it be like to sext/send nudes to the Ghouls and Papa Copia? 

Prompt by the magnanimous @endhisbloodlineinmyesophagus

NSFW/Suggestive below the cut.

Copia:

Count on this man to ruin the mood, not by his own accord (although he does get flustered)

It’s because of him misspelling things/not knowing how to work a phone

It barely matters though when you’ve got him hot and bothered and you know he’ll be thinking of you all day

You sent him a photo of your juicy thighs, pressed together from your seated position. Your garter belt just barely peeking out from underneath your short skirt. 

𝙸 𝚊𝚖 𝚜𝚘 𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝙳𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝙳𝚄𝙲𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶

Ducking, my heart?

𝙸𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚗’𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚝 𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚢𝚙𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙳𝚄𝙲𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙳𝚄𝙲𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙳𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜

I’m fucking crying 😂

𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚒𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚖𝚎?

(You can practically hear him cursing in Italian, getting mad at the stupid phone.)

I’ll come by later to teach you how to fix autocorrect

𝙱𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚌����𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝

-

Swiss:

If you send Swiss a nude just know he’s smiling devilishly

Tries to lick his phone/bite his phone

Just feral things

Wishes he could climb inside his phone and kiss the pixels of your body

He immediately goes wherever he can and strips down to send you an equally racy reply 

You almost drop your phone at his response. There’s Swiss in all his naked glory, standing proudly in a mirror. Fuuuuck.

𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗’𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝙸’𝚖 𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚝

You didn’t give me any warning! Someone could have been looking over my shoulder!

If they were I’m sure they would also like what they saw

You’re incorrigible

Idk what that means  But I’ll take it as a compliment 😏

🙄 ... What are you doing right now? I need to see you

I’m getting ready for a ritual now but if we make it fast…

Say less 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♂️

-

Phantom:

His reaction to receiving a nude from you is best described in two words: 

Cartoon character

His eyes are bugging out and his heart is beating out of his chest

He practically drops his phone upon seeing the explicit photo you sent

I think I'm having a heart attack

Surprise 😽 did you like it?

When he doesn't reply, you actually get a little anxious (like, did he actually die?), but then it sounds like someone slams into your door and you about jump out of your skin.

You wrap your silk robe around yourself, barely getting it tied to answer the rabid banging at the door.

“Phantom! You’re all sweaty! Wait, did you run here?”

“Couldn’t. Stop.” He wheezes, “Had. To. See. You.” He collapses in a heap on the floor.

“Well you didn’t have to sprint here!”

He is still panting minutes later before he composes himself and grins up at you wickedly, “And you, vixen, didn’t have to send me photos of you naked, but here we are.” 

You've got a long night ahead of you.

-

Sodo/Dewdrop:

You didn’t think much of the picture you took

It was provocative, sure, but not explicit

Dewdrop thinks differently though

He’s a sucker for a tease

Boy is off his leash going feral 

Got any more? 🔥

You want more?

Fuck, yes

You send him another picture, this one showing more of your soft skin than the last.

Fuck me

When and where?

All day and I don't care

Bet

He pings your location, he’s on his way.

-

Rain:

You send him a text and a photo of yourself to accompany it

Rain’s phone is a lil slow though, so he only sees your text first

It’s not his fault

But it is his fault that he refuses to upgrade his phone...

I need your help, I fell out of my clothes 😏

Your phone screen lights up. Rain is calling.

You answer in a sensual voice, “Rain? Like what you s-?”

He interrupts you immediately, “You fell?!? Are you okay?!”

“Wait, what?”

He yells again, “Your text!!”

“Oh,” You pause, looking down at your message, “The photo I sent, did you get that?”

“Why would you send me a photo if you fell?”

An exasperated sigh escapes you, “Just wait.”

His phone pings, the picture message coming through finally. He sees a sultry photo of you, bare, in front of the mirror in your bedroom.

“Rain? Are you there?”

He spoke again after a moment, his voice about an octave lower, “I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”

-

Mountain:

He does not text

Like, barely at all if he can help it

If you want to discover his weakness though, just send him a suggestive photo

This ghoul will wax poetic about your body all night long

Unless he's tired of course

Hi you

Hi I’m so sleepy

I’ve got something that will keep you awake if you want

Oh?

You send him a suggestive photo of you in bed, the sheet pulled up just barely covering your body and showing plenty of skin.

Fucking hell

Yeah? What would you want to do if you were here?

…

The chat bubbles sit there for about ten minutes before you get antsy.

Mountain?

You send him a meme from SpongeBob: “One Eternity Later”. Still no reply.

I stg if you fell asleep…

The next morning you wake up to a text from him apologizing for falling asleep. A second message says that he isn’t going to tell you what he would do to you, that he’d rather show you instead.

-

Cirrus:

You didn’t give her any warning, you were just feeling yourself so you sent a little slightly nude photo

Cirrus doesn’t have her phone on her though, it’s in her bag

The kicker? She and Cumulus have the same phone, down to identical phone cases which were gifts from Aurora 

Better not open your phone in public while waiting for her to reply

She will always have to one-up you

Cirrus’ phone buzzes, but she ignores it.

Cumulus holds it up because she thinks it's hers and reads the lock screen, “Cir - your ‘Midnight Snack’ sent you a photo message.”

“Could you open it and see what’s up?”

“Sure.” Cumulus pauses, clearing her throat, “Get over here, you’ll want to see this.”

“What could it possibly be -” Her eyes widened into saucers. "That little -"

"Are you going to reply?"

"Yes," Cirrus says confidently, "and you're going to take a photo of me to send back."

There is one thing for certain: her "Midnight Snack" is getting a treat tonight.

-

Cumulus:

She carries her phone around of photo opportunities and to spam the group chat with memes only

You can send her a naughty pic if you want

But it’ll take hours for her reply

She will make the wait well worth your while

You send Cumulus about 20 or so texts before she finally replies to you.

She doesn't read anything, just sees the picture.

Look at you

It's about time!

You look good enough to eat

The moment is over, been over for hours Unless...

You're in luck, little temptress, because we're in different time zones So the moment is just starting for me

You play along, especially when she sends you a photo to up the stakes that has you falling to your knees.

-

Aurora/Sunshine:

Solely communicates via Snapchat, so it’s easy to get a little spicy

She doesn’t get what you’re trying to do though, at first

Once she catches on, all bets are off

What are you doing right now? 

The photo you send is slightly on the sultry side, your hair looking mussed, and your top undone a few buttons.

She sent you a picture back of her wide grin with the line: 

Just shopping! I wanted to get some ribbons for my mic stand 😁

Well what are you wearing?

Her next picture is from someone else’s POV of her body, she’s standing in a cutesy way in corduroy overalls with her arms crossed. 

Idk what this human outfit is called It combines pants and a top and I love it!

You smile at your phone, she’s so fucking adorable. You reply with a chat:

It’s called a jumpsuit, my sweet ❤️

Yes, that’s it! Cumulus says your first message was “sexting”?? 

Your face turns red and she sends another chat message in rapid succession.

I’ll be there after I check out! Don’t unbutton any more of that top! 🍽️

-

They're all truly living rent free in my brain rn

[lonnitamongus]

A look at the victims of tcmg

With the new release of Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Game, we have been exposed to a terrifying and tense world with lovely brand new characters in addition to the iconic Sawyers. The victims, all original to the game, are just fantastic. Each of them has a rich backstory to them and more so, clear personalities!

Playing the game and playing a good amount with each victim, I have noticed some clear markers of personality in every character through their dialogue.

Sonny, my main, is a anxious yet steadfast kind of guy. He speaks timidly as a mouse, commenting quietly about how horrifying things are while trying to keep brave. Although in stature he is smaller than the other victims, Sonny is brave despite his greatest fears. He constantly amps himself up, urging himself to not loose hope and to get out of tough spots. I really love how Sonny, alongside Ana, are the friends that try to bring peace of mind to everyone else. Sonny isn't a leader but he is strong support to the other survivors and that fact shows even more in his ability to hear other survivors and the killers from far distances. He's a sort of lookout for the group, staying cunning and brave despite clearly being scared. Another thing I have to point out with Sonny is his connection to Maria. Sonny, alongside Ana, clearly want to find Maria the most out of anyone. Sonny constantly talks about how he recognizes the family members from his investigations. Sonny likely spied on the family members and is likely the one who figured everything out, connecting Maria's disappearance to the family. Sonny clearly was adamant on finding his friend and helping Ana out, he's a true friend.

Then there is Julie and... she is a completely different type of character but I love her for that. She isn't a resilient survivor or a strong willed person. In fact, Julie is like an innocent girl stuck in the worst place she could possibly be. Julie is probably the least hopeful victim in tcmg, she constantly comments on how they are all probably going to die and that there is no hope of them escaping. She is extremely fearful about everything happening and that's the dominant emotion that controls what she does. Julie may be extremely scared but that doesn't change the fact that she's way more adept towards survival than she might think. Her extreme fear helps her as because of it she is much more cautious and stealthy than any other victim. Julie is one of the more tragic victims in this game I feel, she always cries extremely hard when she gets killed and I hate whenever she dies. Julie is a sweet soul and the other survivors comment on that when they find her dead body. Connie for example says "Oh sweetie what did they do to you..." Julie to me is clearly a girl who is a sweet soul and wanted to help find her missing friend but she never thought it would go somewhere so horrible. Out of all the victims, she is the only one who regrets coming her and constantly says that they never should of come here. Julie is also super caring! She asks if the other survivors are hurt and she tells each other to stick together. I also love how she casually calls everyone babe, I think it's just a small detail since she is from California but I still think it's cool. She is an extremely scared person but still has a kind and caring heart.

Ana is probably my favorite character, she is just so extremely bad ass and is for sure the final girl of the game. Not only is she the youngest in the group but she is also the toughest. Not just because her toughness stat is crazy high but because Ana herself is a tough person. Out of all the victims, I'd say she is the most fearless and she uses that to her advantage completely. She fearlessly stands up to the family and she has such devotion for her friends and her sister. Everytime she attacks a family member she screams "This is for Maria" or "What did you do to my sister?!" She is a badass in everyway frankly and I love her for it. Her ability shows that too, SHE LITERALLY IGNORES PAIN BECAUSE HER RESOLVE IS SO STRONG. I mean seriously, talk about final girl. If Ana was armed with more dangerous weapons than just bone knives, she would bring hell upon the family I'm sure.

Okay now we have Leland, who is all around a pretty cool guy. He's loyal, strong, and caring. Leland however, is not tough. He literally whimpers on low health, if you want Leland whimper audio just play him for one game and there you go. Leland has a low tough stat and that shows in his personality too. Leland's voicelines suggest he isn't a very brave person but when worst comes to worst, bravery springs up in Leland when he would least expect it. He does great fighting back against family members better than he does sneaking around hoping they won't find him. I feel like Leland is a little self consious about himself, he doesn't think he has what it takes to survive when it actuality he does. He has a true heart of gold and wrecklessly, yet bravely shoulder charges those killers head on despite his fear.

Last but not least, Connie is our last victim. She's crafty and picks locks faster than Bubba can rev his chainsaw, we all know it and we love her for it. Connie is another character I love, although I think her true personality is dulled down a little in such a tense situation. Some of Connie's voice lines suggest she is a kind hearted and witty woman but most of the time she is completely focused on getting the hell out of here. Connie switches from being a kind friend to a girl with more survival potential than anyone could have guessed. Connie, like Sonny, is scared but at the same time she has the strength to mostly ignore it so she can focus on getting out. Perhaps sometimes too much however as her ability makes her too focused on locks to escape to realize the family is around her. I really like this about her though, it really shows how she gets in a tense situation.

Overall I have been loving the tcm game and it's victims are wonderfully fleshed out. It's really refreshing to see these characters, know their motives for being here and their vastly different personalities. It's really refreshing and it just adds onto the intensity of the game. I want the victims to survive and I feel horrible when they don't because they are all so likeable 😭 tcm is just a great game so far and I'm hopeful that the game will continue going strong and just keep improving.

[ellena-asg]

From crossover episode (Touch of death, part II, NCIS: LA 3x21).

In one of my metas about Danny and his mental health I said that Scott perfectly showed all details of Danny's (and in general) anxiety, depression and abuse victimage. I also mentioned that Danny's body language is very clear to me (not only me here, I know from the feedback that there are more people with similar traumas *hugs*), it's like having, you know, victim radar (victim recognizes other victim, signals, something like that).

Yup. Danny's body speaks. Speaks very often. Sometimes speaks instead of Danny. Yes, Danny is strong. Damn strong. He can be bamf!Danny ♥️ He always fights. Oh yes. But he also suffers 😢 Mentally. Still. He can smile, he can joke, he can try to be brave, Mr I'm Okay and/or I'll Be Okay but the pain is still there inside him.

Sure, Danny often talks about things that make him anxious - but not about them all. So much is still inside him. And his body "knows it". His body shows it. His body "betrays" him. His body reacts - f.e. when he has anxiety attack (of any kind) and when those who mentally abused Danny are still (damn!) around him (Rachel, her mother Amanda - the cases we know from canon) or when someone mentions them (like Chin in the scene above - heh, this episode is just one of the many examples).

Yeah, here Chin mentions Amanda. Oh, he says the truth - it's a blood feud. Amanda made Danny's blood boil, living with her (and Rachel), I mean: being in this family, was a pure horror to Danny's mind. Friendly reminder: He was mentally abused, he was treated like a shit, like someone worse, someone who should meet other people's expectations/visions (his dreams? his passions? his emotions? there was no place for them - this family only played with his feelings). Who should beg. Who should feel guilty for everything. He was treated in a very unfair way (Grace too). Once he started hating himself, all what he loved (including job/saving people's lives), his own life (attempted suicide) - because of other people's (Hollander family) manipulations. He suffered as a father, as a human being and as a man too, I guess (cause Rachel's mother seems to have damn misandristic vibes 🙄 - or did she hate/humiliate "only" Danny and "only" for Danny being Danny? ehh). And he was punished for... for having enough. For wanting escape (from "sweet and kind her majesty Rachel"). For telling the truth about Rachel's toxic/manipulative/narcissistic character. For fighting for his beloved daughter and his parental rights. Huh.

Well, Steve knows well how Danny feels. What Danny says about Hollander family. Danny says it, many times and Steve listens. Danny's Stockholm syndrome, signs of it (oh, that's what Steve doesn't see in the Sarin episode) like "I should try with Rach again, it's, um, love" (plus him thinking that it's good for Gracie) are still there but mostly, thanks goodness, there's "What are you doing here, Rachel" and "I love you, Steve" (Steve is like cure, like antidote). Steve knows well that this family hurt/still hurts his Danno (and his Gracie). Well, Steve was at Rachel's (and Stan's) house and he witnessed Rachel's: "Now I'll humiliate you in front of your partner/new friend - by the way... you have friend? Someone likes you? Someone believes/protects you? It can't be!". Steve saw all her lies. Saw her games. Saw her character. Saw her war against Danny and Grace. So... Steve knows and he doesn't want Danny to be with this family again (yeah, he's jealous too but it's another topic 😉). And... Ohana of course knows too.

Chin knows. Danny trusts him. Steve trusts him. Chin knows and sees Danny's past as bloody. As painful to Danny. Blood feud 👉 Hollanders (Savage/Edwards). Exactly, Chino.

Chino, Chino, Chino. Ay, look, I love Chin very much. But he mentioned Amanda, mentioned the past and... Look at Danny. At his body (cause Danny tries to act like everything is okay), his body speaking (seriously, it's just a random example and one day I'll collect them all and write about them, I swear):

The very first reaction:

Silence. Damn silence. No smile. No laughter. No jokes. No sarcasm. Dead silence. What else? Clenched jaw. Narrowed eyes. Tension. Where's that Danny who just had fun with Chin, G and Sam?

He suffers.

I can feel his pain (Chin mentioned Amanda and bad memories came back). I can feel his frustration (cause Chin, seriously, why? and why here? why in front of non-Ohana guys? why you think they should know about Danny's trauma - and about this one caused by his ex mother-in-law?). His anger. Anxiety (panic) attack is coming.

Next reaction: Closed eyes. Mouth open.

Anxiety, anxiety attack. Breathe, he needs to breathe. Inhale, exhale, inhale... Damn, it's painful. Damn, they are there and they are watching.

Third reaction: Okay (it's not okay but it will be - Danny fights with himself, as always). Danny ignores Chin's words (safety).

He literally pretends he didn't hear that. Pretends that Chin didn't say that. He starts talking to G Cullen. He wants to talk about anything, he asks questions, he tries to draw G's (and Sam's) attention away from Chin's words, away from Amanda, from Rachel, from his old life. Chatty Williams is back. And huh, looks like boys didn't notice any change - good, thinks Danny. BUT YOUR BODY, DANNY... 😭

It was a painful moment. Chin means no harm and Danny knows it but still - bad memories (they're painful). Danny doesn't need them. Danny doesn't want to remember that he once had SUCH mother-in-law (oh, it's not just another story about a hahaha salty man and his hahaha "awful" mother-in-law and hahaha "awful" ex wife, nope - it's a sad story about a really anxious person and their really abusive "family"). SUCH past. Danny doesn't need Chin to mention it now or joke about it (Chin doesn't joke but tell it to the anxious mind). If Danny needs to rant about it - HE rants. If Chin wanted to say "Hey, I remember who hurt you and I'm with you" - it's lovely, he's a great friend and brother and Danny knows, Danny appreciates. But hell, it's not a good place, not a good situation, not... (plus: Danny is frustrated and worries now about the world/their case and especially about Steve and Steve's issues in Japan and when he thinks about his beloved one... boom! suddenly Chin summons "ghost" of cursed person).

It was a painful moment but Danny is strong. Strong again. He tries to focus on something safe. On anything not-damn-past-related. He's like "Let's talk about YOUR past instead, G". G mentioned his past earlier so it's okay to talk. And G's past is tied to their case. Damn, Danny can talk now even about the clouds outside - just no more talks about his past. Not now. Not when he doesn't need that.

Yes and no, Chin. Amanda (and Rachel) don't count - they're not Danny's family (never really were), they're not his Ohana. He doesn't need them, doesn't want them - he is forced to hear about them/to see them because of Gracie (for Gracie). But yes, they count - they count as blood feud. As those people who make Danny highly anxious and depressed. And highly angry.

His past. It still makes Danny's blood boil. He is still not safe. He still needs to heal. His body shouts. Meanwhile show writers: 😈

[sunshineyuuji]

Hi I’m glad you’re feeling better. I was wondering if you could write a Dazai x a gender neutral MC where he finds out the reader has depression but also finds out the reader has healthy coping mechanisms and they talk and teach him about it.

Thank you

❤️❤️❤️

"I want a happy ending with you..."

Characters: Osamu Dazai

Warnings: depression, overthinking, insecurities, coping with depression, mentions of reader not eating, gn!reader, mentions of suicide (Dazai's death), maybe bad English?, idk if Dazai will be ooc but just in case, brief mention of panic attacks, it's quite long, ngl;

Notes: hello, Nani~! Thank you so much for worrying~ ♡. I'm happy that you requested, though I must say you caught me by surprise with this request. Personally, as someone who deals with depression, I don't know if I have a coping mechanism for depression? I just try and distract myself from overthinking? (Never ignore your feelings, please. Look for someone willing to hear you) But I'm glad I can talk about this. Also, I'll be speaking from MY experience dealing with depression so I want to be clear that not everyone deals with depression the same way just in case anyone gets confused, ok? Well, I hope I can do this without fucking up. And sorry if it's too long for your liking and uhhh maybe the end is a bit rushed?? Idk, I'm sorry. And sorry for posting this so late!

Osamu Dazai isn't only known for his amazing and shocking books, but also because of his tragic ending. He died by committing suicide with his lover, Tomie Yamazaki, on June 13, 1948. But an opportunity came and Le Comte de Saint-Germain gave him the chance to continue living as a vampire moments before his death... And he accepted.

It is well known that Osamu Dazai battled with depression most of his life, attempting suicide more than once. His decision of living as an immortal is still a mystery.

But he doesn't regret being an immortal being, not now that he met you. You were the most beautiful and extraordinary person in his eyes and nothing could change his mind. You were gorgeous and deserved to be treated like royalty. You were his light.

But he was no fool. Though he always seemed silly and loved to tease, that didn't mean he was a fool, on the contrary. Of all thr guests in the mansion, he was the most observant and attentive to any physical or emotional change in other people. And he knew damn well what you were thinking or feeling.

Depression. You were battling with depression, just like he was.

It all started with the panic attacks you started to have when you arrived at the mansion. I mean, who wouldn't be anxious? You were all alone stuck in another century in a mansion full of men. And if that wasn't scary enough, those men were vampires. You had all the right to be anxious.

He didn't pay much attention to it at first. I mean, he helped you to accommodate in the mansion and was always there to get a smile out of you, but he didn't really think anything else about the panic attacks.

That was until the sudden episodes started.

They started out of nowhere. The night before you could be giggling and dancing with all the guests in the house then the next day in the morning you were oddly quiet. The forced smile on your face when any of the guests were talking, but as soon as they took their eyes off of you, your smile would disappear and you would remain silent again while you stared into space.

When you two started dating, he noticed more about you that just screamed what you were going through. You were always overthinking about the most simple things and were constantly insecure, asking yourself is you were good enough for him or if you could ever make him happy. Then he noticed that you barely slept at night, but always felt sleepy during the day. But what made him step in was when you refused to eat your meal once when you clearly didn't eat all day.

Dazai knew what was going on inside your head and, while he didn't know how to help himself, he wanted to help you because if he helped you he could be better. So he decided to talk to you about it.

"Oh, that..." you whispered, not knowing how to talk about it. "Yes, I'm aware that I did wrong on skipping my meal today... That's why I'm going for a walk."

Anyone else wouldn't have thought anything of what you said, but not Dazai. Dazai felt his chest sink as you said the words "go for a walk." He didn't know if you also had those thoughts and, although he had resorted to double suicide on multiple occasions, he tried to ignore those thoughts and if he dragged you along with him he would lose you forever.

"I'll go with you." he offered, hiding his fear in a smile. "How impolite of me it would be to let you walk alone at this time of the afternoon, don't you think?"

You stayed a few long seconds in silence, contemplating if nothing would happen if he went with you. In the end you agreed to his offer with the thought in mind that maybe, just maybe, this walk could help him too.

"But eat something first." he ordered, his tone still soft and gentle. "I won't let you leave until you eat something."

Although little, you were able to eat the delicious dinner that you had helped Sebastian make. You ate quickly because you wanted to go out and clear your mind. You didn't want to, you had to.

"Can we please go to a walk now?" you pleaded and Dazai had no choice but to go out with you. Using the door, of course. Through the window it was going to be difficult for you.

Dusk came and the sky was painted a set of orange and purple colors. The atmosphere was perfect for a date like those you two used to have from time to time, but today was going to be an exception.

You both walked in silence without any exact destination. Dazai expected you to say something to him, but you only admired the beautiful surroundings. What distracted you was a quiet and lonely children's park. You looked at Dazai, and without waiting for an answer, you walked over to the swings and began to swing.

"Come sit with me." you called out to him while smiling softly.

He quickly sits on the swing next to you and rocks with you. You both enjoy the relaxing atmosphere, the afternoon breeze, and the soft laughter that you both let out. For a moment, you both forgot the real reason you had come out. You felt happy to be able to enjoy this moment with him, even though you knew that this joy would vanish for the moment, but you didn't care. At this precise moment, you didn't care because you knew that the reason for your happiness was Dazai.

But... You stopped. You stopped because even though you were happy with him, you had to talk to him. You continued to rock, but your laughter stopped.

"Dazai, love." you called, causing him to stop.

"Yes?" he answered.

"You know... I know that you better than anyone can understand what's happening to me. These sudden mood swings and so on..."

Dazai stopped swinging on the swing and looked at you. He didn't know what to answer you, although what you said was true: Dazai could understand you better than anyone.

"Sometimes I go out to distract myself." you continued talking. "I'm always looking for something to distract myself and try not to get consumed by it. I'm trying, I swear."

That piqued his curiosity. Distract you? Did that work? He personally never knew how to deal with his depression, since he lived in other times, but he was interested in knowing how you managed to deal with it.

"What things do you do to distract yourself?" Dazai asked interested.

"Oh! Well... I sometimes sneak to hear Mozart playing, which relaxes me." you started to explain a little embarrassed. "Or I bake too. Sometimes sleeping helps."

"That's... I didn't know there were ways to help deal with this." Dazai admitted, fascinated. "So you do things you like to distract and relax yourself?"

"That's correct." you gave him a small smile.

"I see... Can I try something like that too?" Dazai asked.

"Of course! Just look for things that can relax you." you recommended.

"Writing works... And spending time with you."

You blushed when you heard what he said and lowered your head, smiling.

He loved you. You both loved each other. You might have your problems, but you loved each other deeply. Your wish, his wish, the wish of both of you was to overcome whatever life threw at you and be together... For eternity.

[lostusagis]

Kamui's mental state

( This is all headcanons I came up with based off how I saw his character while watching Gintama. I wanted to go more in depth about it.

Anyway, everyone already knows I headcanon him having depression and anxiety, recently decided I'm adding BPD to that too after doing research. If I made any errors regarding it just lmk :)

Depression is something he struggles with a lot. Having a good day, then waking up the next day and feeling absolutely miserable. He gets frustrated by it, but to help him deal with it he will be clingy with someone he's close with or bother his sister just so he won't have to think about anything. If he's alone, he'll spiral badly and have a whole mental breakdown. That's how bad his thoughts can be. He tries hard to ignore them, but sometimes they win.

His anxiety can kick in really badly if someone he cares about gets hurt or sick. Boy, I wonder why? Oh yeah, flashbacks to seeing his mother sick in bed. In general, whenever he's depressed, his anxiety can also be really bad as well. He'll look really jumpy, unable to stay still, fiddling with his hands etc, etc. It really depends on how bad it is, but when he's anxious, he also sometimes does things that can harm himself. Like punching something to the point that his hands and knuckles are bleeding, or even scratching up his face. He's really strong too so these injuries aren't any joke. But self harm usually happens during mental breakdowns and panic attacks. It really depends on the situation though.

But yeaah. a reason why I say he has BPD..... Well, for one he's really nonchalant about dying. He's not scared of it, and on those really bad days he even actively wants it to happen. It has a lot to do with the hatred he has towards himself. Believing he could've saved his mother if he was stronger. Believing it was his fault. Whenever he thinks about that, he wishes he was dead to be honest. He hates himself so much over that, despite the fact that he was a child at the time and nothing could be done anyway. His thoughts tend to be really unreasonable.

He's really strong, so him getting killed in a fight is unlikely but a lot of the time he'll have thoughts like ''Would be nice if this guy killed me actually.'' and stuff like that. Death feels like an escape from all the thoughts constantly consuming his mind. He wishes it would finally happen one day. What's worse is that he keeps all of this to himself, he doesn't like letting anyone know how much he's suffering internally. You might get him talking about his mom, but everything else it's extremely unlikely he'll mention it. Sometimes he'll even be extremely distant too. He handles everything in really unhealthy ways, which is why his emotions always end up being pent up.

Sometimes his emotions are soooo pent up he'll lash out in anger too. Especially if something reminds of the past, or if someone tries to force him to open up.

Also, regarding relationships. He's definitely super sweet when in love but...... he can become incredibly emotionally dependent on his partner. Meaning that he'll lose it if he's not around them. He'll also get suuuuuuuper anxious if they end up upset with him. More likely than not, his partner also helps him to not think about those bad thoughts. Another reason he'll feel a desperate need to constantly be around them. He doesn't want to think about it, he just wants to focus on the object of his affections. Nothing else.

It's a constant for his mind to yell things at him like:

'You're worthless.''

''It's your fault.''

''You can't do anything right.''

''You deserve to die.''

And he's just really tired, he doesn't want to hear it anymore. But it doesn't stop, all he could do is try to ignore it by having something to distract him. Otherwise he'll be drowning in the feelings of worthlessness he's carried since he was a kid.

The feelings of worthlessness only seem to get stronger every time he ends up crying, because he feels weak and pathetic. He tries really hard to be strong, all the Yatos that follow him see him as strong and respect him for that. But when he cries, he feels like he lost all that strength. He feels like that weak little boy who watched as his mother got sicker and sicker and it drives him insane.

He has a lot of intrusive thoughts too. Not much of a surprise they usually involve murder. Sometimes he DOES kill just to feel better, sometimes it doesn't help though. Sometimes these thoughts involve him just disappearing without a trace, or even just..... killing everyone around him, including those he cares about (this isn't one he's actually acted on but sometimes he's gotten close. He's managed to control the urge though. )

Sighs, but yeah he's a fucking mess <3 )

[minisugakoobies]

Inspired by harassing @kiestrokes with the below image, cast your kpop Alice in Wonderland

What did Lokie do to deserve such a cute attack?

I have been thinking on this for days and here's what I've got… I only went for the main characters I could remember, so if I missed any big ones remind me and I'll keep thinking!

Alice - Ten - Okay, I swear this isn't just because he looks amazing in the costume! I think he shares a lot of Alice's traits - he's curious and playful, but also headstrong and determined and doesn't put up with other people's nonsense

The White Rabbit - Han Jisung - Poor Han was the first person I thought of - he's just an anxious bundle of energy sometimes. He takes his work seriously, so I can picture him fretting bout being late for a very important date!

The Queen of Hearts - Hoseok - TELL ME DANCE LEADER HOBI DOESN'T STRIKE HEART INTO THE FEAR OF *EVERYONE.* I absolutely think he could reach the Queen's full-throttle mania if he let himself go.

The Cheshire Cat - Hongjoong - Yeahhhhhh I just like the idea of him wearing a maddening smile and teasing Alice constantly. Pushing her to do the wrong thing. That's all it is. (I did think maybe Yoongi for a moment, but seemed too obvious to make him a cat.)

The Caterpillar - Lee Know - Another one who seemed too obvious the choice for the cat. I think his energy is a better fit for this character - he basically just gets to sit and roast Alice to her face and frustrate her until he turns into a butterfly and deserts her. That's Minho to me.

Tweedledum and Tweedledee - Jungkook and Seokjin - Because Jinkook share one brain cell like these twins.

The Mad Hatter - Jackson Wang - I resisted the urge to make him the villain. Hatter's not a villain; he's not trying to hinder Alice. He just does what he wants when he wants to and it doesn't benefit anyone but himself. Thanks for giving me the idea Luce 😆

The March Hare - Mark (NCT) - From what I remember about the March Hare, he was always confused but very chill/happy about it. That's Mark Lee in a nutshell.

The Dormouse - Woozi - He's just a lil' guy who wants to sleep.

Okay, feel free to add your own suggestions and tell me where I'm wrong or just praise me 😁💕

[tonydaddingham]

(last anon= me, was a bit anxious it might not go over well for some reason- off now bc changing the capitalization was a pain)

i agree on the human aus! love their flexibility, the sorta "yeah, may as well happen" you get clicking on something (with love) completely ridiculous. it's also so much fun to see what people do with crowley's eyes and his relationship to the glasses.

i'm very very early in planning this, but i want a&c to be as close to theirshow characterizations as i can possibly get them (book boys are amazing but i want the drama). i don't know that i'll do a very good job at justifying it with their backstories, but i'm gonna try. (idk. people have different opinions on personality being nature vs nurture. i can claim majority nature if it's more convenient)

i'm thinking here that crowley, personally, would have had to kill somebody or a couple somebodies, in an absolute (it at least appeared so, still does), life or death, them or him scenario (only his life saved). said somebody or somebodies would have attacked first, and out of desperation-- not totally their choice either. i'm assuming for the sake of the fic that he'd be able to do it at all, and then survive a couple decades after, so there's... something.

i just can't figure out exactly how he'd have coped with it, and whether he'd, later, think of it as justified, like how much guilt there would be. don't know what's even plausible.

my biggest problem is that framing him as 100% Good and Pure (and weirdly helpless?) like ppl do sometimes is literally my biggest fear writing this (huge mischaracterization in general). i don't want to go for the exact same indifference as in the show, for reasons you mentioned (and also that level of apathy would fuck up the entire rest of the fic), but not too far in the opposite direction, either.

tysm for the first response and considering a second, this seems a whole lot more solvable- and sorry if it's a lot to ask to go over all this (although your ability to hold a shit ton of information at once and then respond eloquently is impressive asf, looking at like every chain with LWA), i just drew a bit of a blank. also my bad if it's got a little heavy for your blog, just realized looking at the tags 😭

oh @aq-uatic you silly goose!!!✨ im absolutely fine with asks like that, please feel free to sling them my way anytime!!! ultimately tho, that's what the tw was for; just in case it was a bit heavy for someone else, but for me, personally? there's not a lot of themes that i feel uncomfortable discussing, almost all topics are welcome and i'll soon say if they aren't!!!💕

ooooh okay, so a self-defence angle!!! i think that that could be interesting to explore, because - well, you could take it from the perspective that crowley is initially very righteous in defending himself, rightly thinking that he deserved to protect himself, and the use of force was proportionate. he could initially come across as quite dispassionate and apathetic about it, "me vs. them? well of course it was going to be me!", and ultimately not want to address the whole concept of having committed murder because, on face value, it was justified. and maybe he privately doesn't want to examine it bc he's apprehensive about what he'd find?

but then as plot (and character) develops, turns out that because the whole thing was so fast, fuelled by adrenaline and the instinct to survive, crowley ends up... not being able to remember much of it? and as details start to come back, i think that's where the cognitive dissonance element would play - that he then has to reconcile himself as being someone who he feels is morally sound, 'would never harm another human being', a good person... but then is starting to remember his fear in the situation, confronting his own mortality, and what it says about him to be able to take another life with little thought other than his own self-preservation? as well as remember the specific physical details of what happened? the sounds, the smells? looks in the mirror afterwards and sees a different person looking back?

obviously without knowing the full motive of the person attacking him, who they are, what their story is etc.,... i think crowley could end up dealing with it in a way that he accepts that he cannot control others' actions, only his own. that that person chose to put him in the position of having to defend himself, and whilst, yes, that person may have had a family, friends, potential... when he's in a position of ensuring his own survival, he may have actually made the best decision he could have at the time. idk if you're planning to explore the attacker's circumstances in any depth, but if - for example - they were trying to rob him out of their own desperation (e.g. homelessness/austerity, fund addiction, peer pressured/gang context, mental health), maybe crowley would deal with that by exploring charitable work, or good causes, that seek to alleviate that very desperation? and that's how he heals from the experience?

again, hoping this might be some food for thought!!!✨💕 please do link me your fic when you've posted anything, i really admire how you're exploring this concept and it sounds really interesting and promising!!! i'll reiterate that i love getting asks, especially when they explore topics like this; i feel the LWA ones are a little bit of an anomaly, for being really analysis-heavy (which i love, let me clear), but getting to be a bit creative is exciting for me too!!!✨

[octodrop]

stardew characters based on who is most likely to win in a hunger games situation

it's been a hot minute since I made this, but here's some additional thoughts on some characters, from bottom to top:

clint would try and find emily to pair up with but she would already be gone. hed mope around in the open which would leave him an easy target

abigail would think shes such hot shit. but the second shes actually in a threatening situation she would hesitate which would be her downfall

pam and george are both way too stubborn to team up with anyone and it would easily come to their downfalls

sebastian does not have the skills to survive on his own. im sorry

snail is just used to that sort of thing but hes so easily killable. come on

morris thinks hes better than everyone this motherfucker would not team up with anyone if he could

listen. i love sam. but hes kinda dumb. hed get distracted and lost super easily

elliott deserves a dramatic death i think. also its just really funny to me. this man gets blown up

penny has 0 survival skills

i feel like krobus and dwarf would be those kind of deaths that happen without anyone knowing. there's a fire, and they're all alone.

i feel like leo's tendency to live in trees would be his downfall. again, with the fire example, he could get cut off by fire really quickly and have nowhere to go

leah definitely has some survival skills. And I think she'd last longer than most. She has proficiency in some tools that could be used as weapons, But I think she'd be pretty vulnerable in a stage hazard event, especially if she's making it alone.

shane, haley and birdie are pretty self explanatory. Have you seen Haley when she gets pissed off?

I had a whole thought process for Demetrius: Demetrius, Robin and Maru would all stick together (Sebastian had already seperated from everyone else). Demetrius would be super protective of Maru, not wanting anything to happen to his baby girl. But Maru insists she's going to be okay and she knows what to do if she's in danger: the protocols, etc. Demetrius worries if he's being unreasonably anxious over her safety so allows Maru to take a short journey to find water. She heads out. Time passes. A long time passes. There's no sign of Maru. Robin and Demetrius look for her. She'd been attacked. she passes away. demetrius blames himself for the loss and obsesses over it. Robin tries to help him but he can't move on, leaving him an easy target.

I don't remember why I put jodi there?

Gus would absolutely try to help out where he can. but ultimately he's just kind of a guy, he doesn't really have that many survival skills

Linus is hardy and he'd definitely want to help out as many people as he can. But I feel like someone would take advantage of this and kill him

gunther also has the drive to help the community. he can't provide much as an archaeologist but he would definitely do what he could

Harvey would be picked up pretty quickly by a group; his skills as a physician are invaluable in such a setting. This man is a trained professional, and would be protected with whatever it takes. He'd have a lot of support early on, but as number start to decline he'd become more vulnerable. Unfortunately for Harvey, he's physically weak, and does not have it in him to ever cause harm to another human being.

Magnus is a very knowledgeable man, and I think him, Marlon, Gil, Alex and Harvey would make an incredibly strong team. Magnus and Marlon would be experts at tracking field hazards and traps, furthermore, I think Magnus would be the first to sense any sort of approaching disturbance, providing the group with a lot of forewarning and time to prepare for danger. But physically? he doesn't fight with his hands, and if he's unprepared for a physical confrontation, he's gonna suffer

Alex is very physically fit. Honestly? I think he'd be good in a fight. With someone like Magnus to compensate for his himbo nature, he'd go very far. But without that....

Gil, the admin guy, is apparently very good in a fight. yet, we've never seen him leave his chair? the mans gotta rest. so I have no way of knowing how good his fighter instincts are

Then we have the final 3:

Marlon is a very skilled and active adventurer, and aside from what I mentioned above, he's a very seasoned fighter and honestly a powerful survivor so he's an incredibly good candidate for the final 3

Robin is physically active, aware, has the drive and does not a lot of hesitation. She has proficiency in a number of tools that could be used as a weapon, and she has the ability to construct good shelter. Like cmon. how could she not

Kent has been through this before. He's been around the block, knows how to sleep on limited food with one eye open. He's army trained and a war survivor. He knows what he's doing and wouldn't hesitate to kill

Winner:

Emily is an absolute enigma. She has powers beyond any man. I don't know how to elaborate on this any further, but I just know it to be true

[misstrashchan]

@rwbyrg since you said you were interested in hearing my theories overanalyzing certain design choices of a certain blorbo, here we go:

The sensible theory I have accounting for Oscar wearing bandages is the most pragmatic one: he was a farmhand, and wearing bandages around your neck protects your neck from sunburn, and we can tell from his tan skin and freckles that he does work out in the sun often on the farm, so this makes sense. Simple.

This however doesn't account for why he continues to wear the bandages when he acquires his first huntsman outfit in Argus. You could point out he's kept his orange gloves too, which harken back to gardening gloves you'd use for farm labour, so it's about him staying in touch with his roots with the farm boy he started out as, not wanting to forget himself but wanting to grow and be more than a farm hand. But, he's not just keeping the bandages as they are, you can see that he's wearing more of them.

Before it was two or three layers, now it's at least five. If he's embracing the role and responsibilities of a huntsman, why would he keep the bandages that were meant to protect from sunburn? Especially since they were aiming to go to Atlas, which is especially cold and dreary? One answer could be that it's cold, so it's about staying warm.

Another could be about what his first huntsman outfit was meant to convey, him embracing his own allusion (seperate from his allusion to Tip/Ozma which is tied to Ozpin/Ozma) to the Little Prince as he grows into his own person.

As in, he not only looks like the Little Prince, but is trying to be more noble and "princely". And so, the multiple layered bandages around his neck in the context of his huntsman outfit resemble a cravat:

Like the type a romantic gentleman might wear, or, say, a prince.

Then there's the insane and much less likely (but more fun, at least to me) theory to consider of why he wears bandages, which ties in slightly to your idea that it's foreshadowing for him being injured and beat up a lot:

He's wearing them to cover up scars.

Let me clarify before diving into this theory; I don't really believe Oscar's childhood backstory as a character is needed or relevant for his character arc or the story in general, this is mainly a lot of speculation and bare bones evidence I'm red stringing together fueled by my love of angst and foiling between two of my favorite RWBY characters (Oscar and Cinder). So. Please take this with a bucket of salt and note that is mainly my indulgent nonsense. Okay? okay.

Now, we don't know much about Oscar's life growing up. He's an anxious somewhat timid boy, who lived on a farm in Mistral with his aunt. His parents don't appear to be in the picture, which isn't odd, considering Grimm and bandit attacks and all (and they are in Mistral, noted to be the largest kingdom which makes it harder to protect, and so rural communities on the outskirts of the kingdom don't appear to have the same protection as those in the city). So, he's likely an orphan.

We also don't see Oscar's aunt, nor do we even know her surname, so we can't confirm if the two are even biologically related or if he was adopted by her (which wouldn't make them any less family or less loving, as we've seen with Uncle Qrow and Ruby). We know the relationship between them is a somewhat positive one based on the back and forth the two have, but he doesn't sleep in the house with her, his bedroom is in the barn instead, which. I don't know. Feels a bit odd. Like that's where you'd have the person who works for you sleep, not your own nephew.

And I'm absolutely reaching with my red string connecting two faraway dots here, but. We've seen another farm in Mistral. One that functions as an children's home that is essentially about putting children up for adoption so they can be used as free labour. We see this in Cinder's backstory, even before going to Atlas and becoming a serving girl, that she was treated terribly at the orphanage and made to work, and has bandages on her already, we can see her left index finger and right wrist were covered in bandages. (we know she has a scar on her neck from the shock collar used to control her, and she usually keeps her neck covered in her outfits, just like Oscar.)

Cinder was also shown to be noticeably haggard and gaunt looking during her early childhood, as is seen when she is shown to be noticeably thinner, her cheeks more sunken, her eyes having deep black bags underneath them and she often had a tired expression on her face. All clear signs of her mistreatment within the Children's Home in Mistral, where she was likely overworked and underfed.

I don't think it's completely out of the realm of possibility that Oscar could've also been at the same children's home in Mistral as Cinder, similarly mistreated, (hence the bandages) and then adopted by his aunt to help out on her farm (worth noting that his allusion to Tip/Ozma lived as a foster child of Mombi, who lives on a quiet farm, and is treated like a servant by her). But, the notable difference with Oscar is that while he is technically working as a farmhand, he's treated kindly by his guardian, and is reluctant to leave his home.

If I'm being honest I just like the idea that Cinder and Oscar both started out in the same place, and the idea that if circumstances had been different, they could've easily ended up like the other. Oscar ends up adopted to be a farmhand, living in the same kingdom in the rural outskirts working on a farm, in comparison to Cinder, who is taken far away to the glamorous city in the sky in Atlas. But Oscar is treated kindly by his guardian and grows up knowing love and safety, while Cinder's guardians only show her cruelty and abuse. If Cinder had been lucky enough to be taken in by someone who truly cared for her, would she be kinder, like Oscar? If Oscar had been taken to Atlas and treated like a slave, would he be more cruel, like Cinder?

And that idea circling back round to the idea in RWBY that all humans possess both light and dark, and we all have the capacity for great good and evil, and thus we are always capable of change and growth and choosing who we want to be and like. How that fits into their character arcs and their struggle for agency because of Oz and Salem's influences respectively (will they end up just like them because of the Grimm fusion/Merge? Who is that they want to be?)

Aaaaaaand now I'm going to stop before this strays from theory territory and into a full blown ramble about the foiling between Cinder and Oscar.

Do you think they put bandages around Oscar's neck as foreshadowing for how many times he'd get beat up or...

[chaoslynx]

hii can you do asheiji hurt/comfort from eiji pov?? i know that is most of the banana fish fanfictions in existence but i will never stop loving asheiji hurt/comfort ❤️

send a character to my inbox (with or without a prompt) and I’ll attempt to write 200+ words from their POV!

"Breathe with me," Eiji whispers. "Can you do that for me?"

Ash nods. It's a little too frantic, a little too desperate, but he's trying. Almost too desperate to please, sometimes, but they're working on that. Just like everything else: together.

"Okay. With me. In? Two, three, four. Hold. Ready? Out. Two, three, four." Eiji repeats the process a few times, squeezing Ash's hands when he starts to drift again.

Eiji used to snap out the counts, but they figured out rather quickly that the snapping made Ash more anxious, and that Eiji's touch was grounding to him. It works the same way for Eiji; Ash is grounding. 

They both have trouble believing that the other one is real, sometimes, Eiji thinks.

"How are we doing?" Eiji asks, once Ash is breathing steadily on his own. We, with Ash. He likes words like we, or us. Anything to remind him that Eiji is here with him, and always will be.

"Sorry," Ash mumbles. He curls in on himself—small.

Ash told Eiji once that he used to make himself look vulnerable intentionally, to lure people in. He said it to defend the people who hurt him, like it was any less reprehensible to attack someone who seems vulnerable. Like it was any less tragic that Ash needed to make himself a target.

"You're okay. It's all okay," Eiji murmurs back. Another thing they learned together; it's okay works, or nothing to be sorry for—but anything along the lines of don't apologize will swallow them whole.

"It wasn't even that bad," Ash whimpers. And no, maybe the sound that went off outside their apartment wasn't that bad. A car backfiring, maybe—Eiji hardly noticed it, so he's not really sure. But maybe it was just similar enough to a gunshot, just enough to send Ash back.

In that sense, anything can be that bad.

But Ash still struggles to see it that way, Eiji knows.

"We're okay, yeah?" Eiji murmurs. "You didn't do anything wrong."

Ash nods, and even just that action seems calmer already than before.

"I'm proud of you," Eiji blurts.

"Huh?"

Eiji blushes. "Just—you're doing so well. I mean, after everything, I still ... oh, I don't know. I guess I'm saying that you give me hope."

Ash breathes out a laugh, and that alone makes Eiji smile. Shaking his head, Ash says, "I give you hope?"

"Well, yeah," Eiji insists. "How could you not? You're the e-e—"

"It's still pronounced epitome."

"—Embodiment of hope."

Ash laughs, a little more substantial now. "You're the first one to say that. Either of those," he adds.

Eiji doesn't think that's true, but it really doesn't matter whether he's the first or not. Ash is still synonymous with hope to him.

How does he convey that?

Eiji squeezes Ash's hands again, and Ash uncurls a little, coming back from his safe space within himself.

"You give me hope," Eiji repeats. "Seeing you live each day gives me the confidence to do the same. And—seeing you choose me, over and over ... makes me think that maybe it's worth it for me to live, too. Like, if you can love me, then I must be worth something, right?"

Ash's eyes widen. "If ... if you can love me, I must be worth something ... ?" he echoes.

Oh. Did he not have that realization yet? It's one that Eiji's been running on for a while.

Eiji ducks his head, embarrassed now. "Both ways, like always," he whispers. "I guess we're both worth it, then."

"... Yeah," Ash breathes. "I guess we have to be. If we can love each other."

Eiji glances up, and Ash is smiling.

Ash squeezes Eiji's hands this time.

"Here's to love," Ash says, and his voice is stronger now.

Eiji grins. "Here's to love."

[workingonit-currently]

Okay I'm talking about Gwyn Davies.

Yes, this Gwyn Davies.

To be clear before I start, he's a Welsh, religious, older gay who lived in the 19th century and worked under Edison.

(Not actually. That's his backstory in Legend of Tomorrow.)

Why am I talking about him?

Because I, myself, am a Welsh non-heterosexual.

(To be clear this is only my opinion and view and pride as a gay Welsh dude who grew up being nervous and scared. This is not meant to say my struggle as a Welshman and my experience was 'oh so painful' or similar at all to what POC or any other minority experience. Just meant to ramble about a character I love.)

................................................................................

First point, he's so unapologetically..Welsh.

I know, it shouldn't matter, it doesn't matter much.

Just, I grew up scared of being Welsh. (Stupid, I know. In my own country? In WALES!? Never.)

I grew up scared of getting a welsh accent. Because I thought it was a sign of lower intelligence, of being too emotional, violent and many things that are also very negative.

Obviously now I'm older and much wiser, I know no accent defines a person. I just grew up seeing a Welsh character, an exaggerated Welsh accent and seeing them as bad. Obviously I didn't look too hard at the 'right' Welsh characters in my youth but maybe that's another problem.

I never fucking heard a Welsh accent, a strong one, a weak one, one that I wasn't ashamed to copy. I heard mound on mound of english accents, I copied that instead.

If I had had a character like Gwyn when I was younger...well let's say I'd be much more comfortable with my identity. I'd have been proud and probably more comfortable like I am now, a few years earlier.

He has the accent and boy, what I wouldn't do for him because of that. I..didn't realize how much the accent brought me pride and love until I heard it. (I know we Welah have many accents but any is better than none.)

He has a Welsh name.

His name is Gwyn and I don't know how much love that brings me. (Plus he keeps correcting people on how to pronounce Davies. If that isn't relatable...)

He's also...religious and gay.

I swear, if I had had a character like that in my life years earlier I wouldn't have had such a low self-image. I would have seen myself in a new life. I would have been able to actually see myself and see myself as an actual character in my fantasies, a winner.

Let's not get into how he's allowed to be emotional, he's allowed to not completely be at peace with his love and his religion, how it's still not a fix when he sees the time he was born in is not the be-all and end-all. Things get better. He's allowed to be damaged and anxious and weak but he's still seen as a courageous, good and sweet man. He's not a stereotype, he's just himself.

He's allowed to have reservations and argue and raise his voice without being the bad guy.

He's allowed to be damaged and have panic attacks. But no one sees him as weak or sidelines him.

He's allowed to be smart and kind.

He's allowed to be from the 1800's! He's allowed to not know things and have old views but he's also allowed to be accepting and confused, ask questions and just be.

Just. I think he's really nice and I'm glad he exists. I'm glad I can name at least one 100% Welsh character in fiction.

Not British, but English, just Welsh.

Secondly, what Gwyn is.

He's a pacifist, he's scared, he's religious, he's smart and he's nervous.

But he's not made fun of for any of those things.

He is introduced as a character to help the Legends get time travel again and escape the time period they're stuck in, which has been shown to suck SO MUCH for anyone not straight, white or male. (Like they take 4 episodes to establish how fucking casually backwards the time period is for them.)

So they introduce a Gwyn who's Welsh, a minor foreigner and working under Edison. (Everyone who knows, KNOWS that's shit.)

And okay, they make a running joke about mispronouncing Davies even after ge corrects them but Oh well.

So they set up this, 'times are hard for those not seen as American enough, straight, white and male.' And then introduce this Welshman who obviously is overworked and stressed.

The Legends full on mess up this man's life and only return to fix their mess when things go wrong for THEM!

And the episode kind of calls them out on that. He's full-on in a mental institute and the only reason Sarah returns for him is because Ava and B disappear. (Gwyn states he will not get involved because they messed up his live. Picked gom up and chewed him out like a piece of meat after they were dome with him...honestly...)

Anyway, Sarah full on causes a panic attack in him and she doesn't stress him out further, no one makes fun of him, they just try and help.

DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING GOOD IT FELT TO SEE THAT! Them not making a big deal but still having him, even many episodes on when he's with the Legends, have panic attacks. Like his PTSD didn't go away, he's not 'healed'.

Not only that but he has a comfort object and a calming sentence, he flipping prays to calm himself. He doesn't want to be touched when panicking.

Like they SHOW his self hatred and don't shame him for having it. They show he's human and make no joke of it. He's not a monster or weak.

Now after highlighting how shit the time period is and after escaping the time period we get explicitly TOLD Gwyn is gay, he built his time machine FOR Alun, the man he loved and lost.

The entire thing that saved the Legends, that even allowed Gwyn to escape the unaccepting time he was stuck in, was his love for Alun.

We're also explicitly told he hates himself for that love. He doesn't hate the love, he loves Alun and he would not change that, he just hates that because of his love, in his mind, he is damned by his faith to fail, to not have that love.

And that is respected.

The Legends never force him to abandon his faith, never shout at him for it. They just respectfully say maybe he is meant to have love and God might want him to have love because love is wonderful and beautiful.

Plus they allow him to be a pacifist, to avoid fights, to not fight at all. They don't shame him for that, don't even mention it.

They even let him avoid leadership though being suited for it. They showed me a character who COULD lead but couldn't lead. A man who has the brain of a leader but no ability for it. He has the skills but no proficiency for it if you get me?

He can not handle the pressure of leadership despite having the skill for it. And they allow that, they show him being a good leader but don't push him into that role besides one time because that's the thing, he can but he won't.

They allow him to be WRONG!

They show his PTSD blacked a part of his memory out. That he forgot a part of his past and they don't...demonize him. He's allowed to have symptoms, real, bad ones. But they don't burn him at the stake for it or make the audiaclnce hate him. They just show him and show his struggle but don't make you pity him or make him weak, just show and respect.

He's not a stereotype. He's soft-spoken, awkward and nervous but never femanized, he's not young or infantized, not the joke. He's allowed to be soft but strong willed and determined, nervous but have skills, be useful, step up when needed. They make him human and show some...honestly to me, much needed representation of gays that are suit-wearing nervous beans like me.

He's allowed to speak Welsh! (That shouldn't bring me to tears, it shouldn't. But it does. Okay, I have not seen one single other Welsh character that has so perfectly captured my heart as Gwyn so seeing him be Welsh and be like me...it's comforting.)

Plus..Matt Ryan is Welsh. Like...I guess I may not have been exposed to the right media but I can only name about 3 welsh actors....and I don't suppose to know what Matt Ryan experienced as a kid but I think, at least in part, he's playing a character he wanted to see as a kid. He's playing a welshman because he never got one to look up to when he was like me, struggling to find his place. So knowing a Welsh actor us playing a Welsh actor...just nice.

It's nice to see.

They even don't just 'cure' him. He's still got low-self esteem, he still is confused by future stuff, he's still religious, still gets panic attacks.

Those never go away, he just gets better at dealing with them.

He has a support system and is better for it.

I just love seeing a character that I can identify with and love, who proves I can not be ashamed of who I am because if they're allowed to be like that then so am I.

[araminakilla]

Day 35: 🎶 La Seine, la Seine, la Seine 🎶

First clip of the movie thanks to the Tumblr blogs of @sastiorn and also @shields-and-depthgauges-oh-my for posting it. Because we are only 5 weeks away from the premiere of the movie in Spain, they are releasing little sneak peeks of the third movie. Maybe we will get more of them in the following Fridays or earlier than that.

Anyway, I just LOVED the clip and all the implications it carries in less than 40 seconds. Like boy, those were some intense 40 seconds.

I will explain why in three words:

Police vs Mummy

Should we also include Tad, Jeffzoni and Ra-Amon-Ah as well? Yes, but also no.

Why? Because he is according to the director, a VERY important character in the third movie and according to french sources, Tad has his main nemesis in Ryan, the leader of the mighty trio of archeologists.

Of couse, the agents and the curse are a problem to him too but guys... everything is indication they are Mummy's main problem.

Incan mummy has the curse on him, he's the one who is battling to not let it take over him and it looks like he's losing forces to keep it at bay.

Pickles and Ramirez are following his account and being involved in his possible capture (especially Mr. Pickles, but that's a theme for another post)

After the Louvre incident, they have a very good reason to arrest him: the Mona Lisa being vandalized.

But something else has to happen for them to call the army, maybe they saw him transform into Ammit before arriving to Egypt.

In their eyes, they are doing a great favor to the world by eliminating this monster. They don't really see the content Mummy posted online.

At least is confirmed Agent Pickles just is seeing a monster, a potencial menace trying to hide with a phone filter.

It is possible this image is the first time the group encounter the french police (after the agents failed to reach them on land) and some police officer says on a megaphone they are arrested.

The one who is more worried in the image Mummy, as Tad is more surprised and Ramona is just confused.

It looks like Mummy is trying to push away the police boat, to no avail. He wants to get away from them ASAP

And let's look at the best part of the clip in my opinion:

"I'm too young to go to jail!"

"Nobody is going to jail"

Can we just. Talk about. This scene 👆🏽

So much emotion and details!

The way Mummy at first looks so amashed, like he just broke something very important on a elegant building... which he kind of did, but that's not the reason he's so worried as he thought he made the painting better.

Then the way he looks many times at the police boats, then back at Tad then at the boats in less than one second. The undead is so nervous he can't focus on only one person, using his hands to give himself air as if he's suffocating for a panic attack.

Then there's the fact he says he's too young to go to jail, which should be a joke given he's +500 years, but comparing his age to Ramona's (probably more than a thousand) and the way he acts in general, he feels like he died young, maybe mid twenties.

Also Tad, he is very worried about playing a part in the persecution and how everything is his fault to begin with.

But he manages to look at Mummy and giving him a little shook with his head denying the thought of his friend being in jail, being him the one who has more visual contact with Mummy while the other doesn't know where to look.

He also raises his hand to calm down his brother while reassuring him nobody is going to jail. It's so heartwarming.

But Mummy only thinks he will go to jail if they managed to capture him?

Oh sweetie... you kind, cursed, anxious, little peruvian andean child. No, jail will only be a sweet dream knowing what people could do to a living mummy.

And then Ramona breaks the moment while saying the equivalent to "Look where are you going slaves"

She DID call them slaves in the clip. She's definetly royalty, but also looks down at Mummy for the simple fact that he is not egyptian, denying that he is even a mummy to begin with. I'm really curious to see her development.

Going back at Mummy, he really just wanted to be somebody to the world, not in the "famous and rich" aspect, but he only wanted to be recognized as a fellow being that, in the modern world of humans, could fit in.

But everything backfired at end with many people being NOT happy with his existence, and now the agents know about what he really is...

and these two french police officers

and all of those french people there

and the rest of people on those boats.

Hence, this "discovery" could lead us to:

This scene, where an authority of Paris has to probably calm down its citizens by all the conmotion that happened in and out the Louvre Museum.

Maybe they already know there was a Monster in Paris (*roll credits*) or two.

I just want a good resolution to all this scandal. And for "good" I don't mean "everyone forgot about the incident. Tad and Mummy went scot free and everything was back to normal. The end"

No, what I'm talking about is how the world is going to react to the fact that there are two living mummies, magic, places that have a lot of riches in their own countries. The unknow.

How things will end up with Victoria Moon, agents Ramirez and Pickles, especially Mr. Pickles as he is the more determined of the two. He really wants someone guilty and resolving that case.

Hope the end is not only an average end, but the beggining of something greater.

They have the potencial, they just have to play all the cards right.

[beepityboopbeep]

Hey there! Could I request headcanons for Porco x reader (childhood friends to lovers au)?

║✿║ATTACK ON TITAN: Porco, Childhood Friends to Lovers (headcanons)║✿║

Warnings: S4 spoilers

Summary: (request) Porco being your childhood best friend to lover

Characters: Porco Galliard, Pieck Finger (platonic), Gabi Braun (platonic)

Rare Achievement Unlocked: Porco trusts you enough to express his emotions comfortably

As kids, you two shared a dynamic kinda dimilar to Eren and Mikasa in a way (if that's the best way I can explain it)

With him going off and getting himself into trouble, you were often there to look out for him and get him out of trouble

He's very aggressively protective of you as a kid

(Like you need it, you a baddie;) )

Porco has always felt a need to prove himself, and he's often got into crazy antics before that

Expect a lot of "I don't need your help" and "I'm fine! Just go away"

You know he doesn't mean it tho, even when he gets angry

As you two grow older, Porco begins to see you as a source of stability in his life

Especially after the death of his brother

When you're alone he'll often soften up, he has a habit of resting his head on your shoulder/thighs and ranting for a bit

It comforts him, considering you've been there since he was a kid, he feels like you're someone who he can trust, who understands him

(Pieck shipping you two in the background)

You two are touchy for friends, occasional cuddles and hugs that linger too long, the fluttering feeling when you two see each other, fighting the urge to hold hands...

As you both think about your feelings, Porco realises how he feels for you.

Initially when he gets feelings for you he panics

'Damn it! Why them?'

This isn't meant as an insult, more so he's worried about ruining your friendship

He couldn't deal with you leaving, so he'll supress his feelings

However others can see they way he looks at you when your back is turned and even you can pick up on the change in his stare

You will probably have to confess first

Because it'll take him alot of work to confess

What he didn't expect was you return those affections

As a boyfriend, he's protective, often randomly intimidating people.

"Lay a hand on my s/o and you're dead."

He goes from this to bashful puppy within minutes

"...can you kiss me again"

He's very perceptive of you because he's known you for so long, if you feel sad or anxious, he'll catch on quicker than you will sometimes.

As I said before he's extremely protective

This is because he's absolutely terrified of loosing you like how he lost his brother

He's worried he won't be enough, that one way or another you might leave him

He's rather insecure (tho he doesn't tell anyone)

As far as PDA goes, he doesn't mind some light teasing

But if you start being affectionate in front of kids (ESPECIALLY Gabi) well...

Porco.exe has stopped working

Poor man will never hear the end of it

MODERN AU

He's definitely the type to lend you his jacket

✨Moterbike bf✨

He'll go on dates somewhere random out of the city where you two can both see the stars

He's pretty rude in highschool but also gets pretty good grades so he doesn't get into much trouble

Defo will beat someone up if they bully you/say something rude about you

You have you own personal simp bodyguard

Honestly as much as he plays up the 'tough guy' act the thing he values most about your relationship is being able to feel safe and understood. He can express himself without worrying about judgement or meeting someone's expectations

A/N: shshshshs- I've never done Porco before I hope this wasn't ooc, he honestly deserves more screentime so I can't wait for a rematch with eren in s4 p2. Anyways thanks for the submission and sorry it took so long, this was fun to do, okay bye now dearies

That's why he loves you <3

ATTACK ON TITAN MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

[0lshadyl0]

May I request hcs for aizawa, hizashi and midoriya with an s/o that is really calm and chill but she actually has a bit of social anxiety but the guys don't really know (besides seeing that she doesn't like hanging out in big get togethers) until one day they go shopping with their s/o and notice their hand trembling slightly as they pay for the stuff and then actually kinda nervous in the crowds of people as they walk (kinda me cuz I literally go into panic mode when I have to buy something..)

Poor deluded person if you think that they would not realize it, that is, maybe the one who does not realize it at first is Present Mic and I am honestly doubting it a lot because these three characters have an ability to perceive the emotions of other people, especially if that person is important and even more if that person is beloved, you cannot imagine, so there will be some changes in this answer

Hizashi Yamada/Present Mic with a s/o that is really calm and chill but she actually has a bit of social anxiety

• Ok, let's start with who I think, of the three, would take the longest to realize

• And I still think that it would not be very possible, after all, I think that Present Mic has great emotional intelligence and that he could easily tell if his s/o has social anxiety

• even if we say she would be fooled by the fact that she always seems very calm, without getting anxious, at least she doesn't look like, and without looking stressed

• Although the fact that she was always rejecting his invitations to go with him to his studio on the radio or to the galas, it would also raise suspicions, right? it's sus my dude 

• So when he was accompanying her and notice how her hands are shaking and how nervous she becomes when shopping, he would quickly try to become the center of attention to prevent s/o from being the focus of attention and make her relax a bit

• something that he would easily achieve since, as we can see in the series, he is very extravagant

• He could also help her by doing the shopping for her, but I honestly believe that someone like Hizashi would like his s/o to be a little more independent and thus gradually overcome his fears

• of course unless she starts having an anxiety attack, and if that happens I think he would take matters into his own hands, do the shopping himself and take her home as quickly as possible while he whispers in her ear comforting words

• After he's calmed her down I honestly think he would search the internet or ask other fellow pro heroes for ways to help his s/o

Midoriya Izuku/Deku with a s/o that is really calm and chill but she actually has a bit of social anxiety

• Let's be honest, with this person it is impossible he not realizing the social anxiety that his s/o has

• Please, he is literally like a stalker with each and every one of his colleagues or person who has a quirk, interesting or not 

• Do you seriously think that you shouldn't have like 25 or more written notebooks dedicated exclusively to finding out new things about his s/o

• The fact that you seem calm will not deceive him, he will be many things, but he is not an idiot, nor a clueless one

• Already making it clear that Midoriya knows about his s/o's social anxiety, even before they form a relationship, he would do everything possible to find ways that his partner manages to overcome those fears

• I'm sure he has a great internet track record on trying to help people with social anxiety

• If that did not work, he would accompany her to all public places and would always be holding her s/o's hand to squeeze it as a symbol of moral support

• Although we must not forget that he is also another shy person so now they have two with social anxiety, it will be nice to see how he will have his whole face  red as a tomato while they try to attract people's attention so that she does not get anxious

Aizawa Shouta/Eraserhead with a s/o that is really calm and chill but she actually has a bit of social anxiety

• This is another of those who are very observant with the people around him, much more if that person would be his partner, therefore, I say that he would know in advance about her anxiety

• Of course, it took him a little longer since her laid back looks that outwardly seemed calm could mislead him a bit

• but not for long, as I told you he is very observant

• being honest I think that, of the three, he is the one who would first make her seek professional help because that is definitely affecting her life in a negative way

• the least Aizawa wants is for it to affect in a way that does not make her happy in her s/o's life

• so Shouta would accompany you on your psychological appointments to discover what makes you anxious and would help her, he will be with her step by step throughout the process until she feels better

• And as she improves he will be there by her side helping her, whether he has to intervene when she feels overloaded, take action and do the shopping himself or simply be close to her to make her feel safe and can get things done by herself, Aizawa will never leave her alone

[raegalliard]

What makes you love porco so much? I hope that doesn’t sound mean…I love him too but I enjoy hearing others about why they enjoy him

hey anon~

you opened the door, fair warning lol

okay so I love porco because he's such a complex and fascinating character. he's deeply caring and so so so much more than what is thought of as the "tough guy" exterior that he puts on-- I'll start from his passing.

Porco being shown here is no coincidence. He's just seen Marcel's memories-- that Marcel influenced the army to prevent him from being a Warrior in order to protect him.

of course, his final words. these lines are so important. SO DAMN IMPORTANT. porco has felt from the start that he was never good enough, especially when he wasn't initially chosen as a warrior. he saw Reiner as a weaker person, and latched onto that, because he's likely felt similarly for a majority of his childhood living in marcel's shadow. he's not good at being vulnerable and expressing his emotions, so all of this self doubt that's lingered was held beneath that rough and defensive exterior. I'll expand on his personality more in a sec.

but with his final words-- it's porco saying that he WAS good enough the whole time. he was worthy.

Gabi says this, and precisely. porco chose to give up his life. healing his body to get out of his titan form and allow himself to be eaten so Falco could have another chance. he saw colt sacrifice himself for Falco, a big brother sacrificing himself, just as marcel had done. porco adores the kids, and is 100% family oriented. he had no qualms sacrificing himself.

backing up- he protects his friends/comrades over and over.

look at how anxious porco looks. he thinks they've both been killed, quite possibly. he's DEVASTATED. his friends, comrades. try and tell me that sweetheart doesn't care.

he then proceeds to take on eren fucking jaeger by HIMSELF. no backup, no help. eren, who possess the founding and the attack titan. has the survey corps backing him up, including Mikasa and Levi. porco has brass balls.

again, porco jumps in and saves his friends. he also warns her, knowing the danger.

When Falco beats Gabi in the race once and they all cheer, everyone makes delighted comments-- except Porco. He murmurs about how the standards are vague for selection. He has many doubts about what ended up happening to him, he's intuitive and smart as a whip, even if it's only hinted at through some snarky comments. Porco puts on this defense to protect his hurt.

okay so I didn't crop this page because it really is so important. porco is so SO hurt over not having been chosen as a warrior. look at the last panel, his heartbroken face. he's devastated. he doesn't understand.

so Porco's not seen marcel's memories, but knows that they abandoned him to be eaten by Ymir. yet, despite the limited information he's been given, he's been able to figure all of this out.

-------------

okay but here's my summary.

Porco Galliard is a caring, complex, emotional, intelligent character. He's strong and capable and overlooked. I hate that he gets reduced to a "fuckboy" or a "himbo" or a degrading jerk style guy. I just don't see it. He's amazing and I adore him thank you for listening to me