#I have a ton of art in my drafts that I have yet to post

[ricky-mortis]

They're the best of each other!

[tvtoontime]

Hey I've seen that you've not been active recently, I like the comic so far, so I have a question why haven't you been active?

Sorry for not answering questions as of late! I have a few answered ones in my draft!

I DO APOLOGIZE IF THIS POST MAKES YOU FEEL UNEASY OR UNCOMFORTABLE. This post is mostly for anyone who’s curious about the lack of posts. I don’t need any comfort, compliments or reassurance, trust🫡.

(I’ve been meaning to talk about this topic in detail for a while but i know people get uncomfortable with this kind of negativity!)

“STRAIGHT FORWARD” ANSWER:

I’ve been a little less motivated to draw, thinking every drawing or comic isn’t worth looking at. Im not consistent with my art and want to change up everything if i’m not satisfied with it which makes it confusing for everyone else. Dandy’s design is a big example of that.. Lots of comparing comes into play too. I do NOT have a pretty art style what so ever. dgmw, It’s not meant to be pretty but i get embarrassed when I draw something that’s meant to be somewhat pleasing to the eyes but turns out cringy.(dandy & astro comic). There’s such pretty art out there and it feels like im destroying the beauty of the characters. I also feel like I disappoint others consistently since i have high expectations for myself. I want to improve faster and faster so i push myself. At this point i might’ve accidentally over done it. I took a break to see if that’d help things but when i came back there was a TON of negativity on tiktok.(where i started out) which also pushed me away further to draw since i liked seeing positive things about dandys world! I’m not giving up just yet, because i want to live my art and keep inspiring younger or even older artists to draw different angles and so much more!

(I will also point out, whenever I draw, it takes a lot of time. i am unfortunately a slow artist..sigh.💔)

MORE DETAILED ANSWER WITHIN:

TW: LOADS OF SELF NEGATIVITY & NEGLECT.

Let’s start from the top.

HAPPINESS?

Tiktok was where i started posting comics. (i never made a comic before, so that was my “first” time) All i really wanted to do was post relatable dw experiences for the fun of it.

I didn’t realize people would actually like a simplified, horribly colored, comic. Either way, I was having fun.

I got this really weird motivational high when others wanted more or the “next part”. i literally couldn’t fall asleep and wasn’t eating from all the thrill. I couldn’t tell if I was happy or really anxious from the attention.

I got a little afraid once i reached 10k or something like that. I didn’t have a story for the “AU” nor did i ever create one in my life. I couldn’t tell if people liked filler episodes or random episodes or if they really liked the lore/plot.(everyone was angry at qwel for not showing any lore so I got worried about that happening with me and wasting everyone’s time.)

GROWING GUILT.

At one point i took a break from the comic to create some silly little christmas special which,, i should have planned out beforehand. It felt like I made a promise to post every night for december like a christmas advent calendar(that was the plan basically).

Big mistake. I already had an insecurity/fear of disappointing others. I believed i could make these silly little shorts every night. I once again struggled to sleep and eat but this time from guilt that was growing. I finally called it quits on the 7th day(sad ik i only made it to 7 days lol) since a lot of people were concerned once i was late and i seriously didn’t want to concern anyone. I still had ideas but i couldn’t keep up with the days.

OVERWHELMING SUPPORT.

The support from the familiar faces was and still is overwhelming. Everyone was/is so nice and yet i still felt like i let everyone down? I felt like i needed to give more or try harder as thank you for supporting and being there and for treating me like a human being especially when other creators had people pushing them to make their comics. No one asked me to try harder but i felt/feel the need to push myself, or to make a better version each time.

I don’t know how to take compliments. A small thank you doesn’t feel like enough. I want to do MORE but I know I can’t.

TOOK A BREAK.

I didn’t want to take a break, but it was needed. I also needed to take advice from the familiar faces i saw because they were right. I thought I was ready to come back because, I had a story, had a plan to go at my own pace, say a simple thank you for the support, and move along. I also wanted to step out of my comfort zone and become one with the community. (Idk if this was such a good idea tbh LOL. I feel invasive like rodger or shelly.)

FANDOM NEGATIVITY.

I loved the community and how silly we all were back when it was growing. The way people portrayed the characters in their aus, created lore, ships and their names were creative, ocs, and so much more to create a somewhat healthy community. It was Dandy’s world’s prime time for me.

However,,, During March, All i saw was negativity.

No one was negative in my comments, however, whenever i went on tiktok, all it was, was(and still is) negativity. I’m not talking about slimetok or some shit hating on “us” and changing the “💔” emoji to a rotting flower, I’m talking about our OWN community hating on the new updates, hating on certain characters, on aus, on ships, hating on ANYTHING that helped create the community. Some of the community members are also something else. All of this negativity really killed my motivation(personal stuff too). Dgmw, people can have opinions, but holy shit? How much negativity are you gonna diarrhea out???????

We’ve got bigger problems in the world. I already know this! But we kind of need to be happy here and there or else we’ll all be depressed or some shit.(an escape basically.) Unfortunately I used DW to cope which is probably why i’m feeling sad about all of this negative change.

OVERTHINKING DISAPPOINTMENT.

Due to the popularity on tiktok, I felt as though i was disappointing those large amount of numbers. I do feel like i should only focus on the people who are “closer” to the account, but i’ve had another issue with that too. Anyone I feel closer to, I feel like they’re going to be more disappointed not only in the art but they’ll get bored with my personality too? I’m still trying my hardest not to care so much about disappointment but it’s been a little tricky.

Unfortunately I look at my art differently now, hating everything i post and judging myself too quickly. I spent over 150 hrs on the two long comics “Abc song” “Snowballs coming your way” or something like that, and despise them. I also disliked the gigi/flutter/looey comic even though that one had gained the most attention on tiktok.

THE POSITIVE…?

I’m still drawing/posting since people get inspired by the art/perspective and it still makes me feel worthy enough to continue the comic/drawing. I too want to like my art again, so i’m not giving up. also my little sister took my ipad for school projects so i can’t exactly draw much rn…🧍

[fudgelling-away]

I am posting a WIP to share how happy I am that I've made that reference pic for Sans. It was a pain but it was worth it. It really is useful. I hope it will help me keep his appearance consistent for at least some time.

As you can see, drawing his belly was not enough to satisfy my simping needs, no... I had to lift his shirt up... heheh. I just cannot control myself.

Other than becoming more unhinged in my obsession, it feels like I started to make some progress in art. Learning how to draw properly is very hard for me because I am mentally exhausted after my office work. It's a very fast-paced, difficult job. After hours of problem solving I am left with no strength and no desire to learn anything new. All I want is to... do nothing and just rest, really, but I force myself to keep being creative. I cannot force myself to properly study drawing, though. That would be too much and I have no space for another mental load to bear.

That being said, I still feel like I am making some progress. And I am happy, and that's what matters. Right now I am working on a reference sheet for expressions, as well as drawing his skull from different perspectives. That's a lot of fun and it's not nearly as frustrating as I thought it would be.

Also, I am trying to become active on AO3. I've recently realised that I talk about my favourite fics all the time but I am yet to leave a single comment. That is shameful and that's going to change. I will do better.

Other than that, I am focusing on finishing some of my ficlets, but English has become weirdly difficult for me these days. Not just English, actually. I don't know why. Everything I say feels wrong. The sentences I build feel... off. I have no idea what's up with that. It's possible that it's the lack of a proper sleeping schedule. I hope it will pass eventually. It's horribly frustrating.

I hope you all are doing well! I have seen tons of your pictures that I plan to reblog and comment on (about 50 are waiting in my drafts). I have fics waiting in a queue to be read. There is so much art everywhere... Thank you, Sans simp community, for being so awesome.

[pilotprojectvogelfrei]

Project V DRAFTS! Vogelfrei 2: Wilder Winter

Beware, Art and Writing spoilers ahead!

Vogelfrei 2: Wilder Winter (V2:W2) Believe it or not, but this doodle from November of 2024 has a crazier lore than all of Vogelfrei 1 combined. *More drawings follow at the very end!

Start note

Hello folks! I’d like to start by wishing a great day to the 6-ish people following this Gravity Falls Shenanighans account ! After some debating and consultation, I decided to post ahead some designs for characters which will make an appearance in the sequel. (that’s right, Vogelfrei is a duology fanfic project!)

Since character designs are subjected to change(Especially Lidia who might have to change colour because I’ve seen other lilac triangle ocs on Tumblr), I’d like to layout the idea of it at least before it becomes unoriginal. After all, a story cannot solely rely on the element of surprise to be good, it’s the content that makes it interesting.

Vogelfrei will have a Sequel?

The first book is barely at its beginning and it already has a sequel?

Why, yes! I had the unfortunate idea of creating an outline for the sequel back in December of 2024 while searching for an ending of the first book.

What’s so different about Wider Winter?

Wilder Winter will focus on out-of-worldly shenanigans a lot more than the first book!

It will also have a ton of invented concepts for the narrative that strays further away from TBOB, going against nearly EVERYTHING that happened in the canon series and books.

Basically, it’s undoing most of the effects of Bill’s past crimes while consequences follow.

Without further ado …

Summary

Bill Cipher , a patient in the Theraprism’s Interdimensional Tyrant Ward, had been sentenced to a rehabilitation program called Pilot Project Vogelfrei. Previously, he had been sent to Earth in the dimension 46’/ and had been working on himself while illegally squatting living with the Ramirez and Pines families during the summer of 2015, before an incident which led the early conclusion of the project.

Fortunately for himself, Bill Cipher was soon released back into the multiverse and had been living a relatively quiet life back in Gravity Falls, Oregon, USA. However, the following winter, trouble follows him as he and the family reunited for the holidays. While Ford and Bill go out to gathered firewood, they get ambushed by an invisible enemy and Bill gets severely injured.

In the aftermath of the fight, Bill was violently removed from dimension 46’/, leading to a chain reaction that soon put the multiverse’s stability at stake.

He ends up in his metaphysical form yet again, encountering people who should’ve been dead, while trying to evade his own death. Vogelfrei 2: Wilder Winter, Featuring:

-cutiesy queer-platonic Billford at the beginning. (NOT the main focus of the story)

-Bill on a death row, AGAIN!

-The rebirth of Euclidia?!

-Time Baby is back, babey!

-Ford and Bill ,in different places, being inter-dimensional criminal menaces.

-Are those bounty hunters or simply killers with a warrant?

-The Pines and Blendin Blandin travel through space and time.

-Bill is NOT FIT to be a trusted adult, but here we are.

-Tad Strange, Bill Cipher and Steven Pyramid are NOT related.

-“Who gave that kid a GUN?”

-Surprise adoption?

More Art (traditional and digital)

[transcript of the convo between Bill and Lidia]

Bill: OH EM GEE LIDIA VERTEX, have you NO decency?!

Dee: *squints* …

Bill: And anyways, I’m an equilateral, that makes me better than you.

Dee: … *thinking to herself* oh my Pythagoras, not this again.

Dee: *smirking* Oh yeah? Well I think you’re just an OLD SORE LOSER who tries to cover up the fact he got no boyfriend.

Bill, his eye blood red: NOT TRUE !

[end of transcript]

End note

Vogelfrei 2 will be even more of a mixed media project, I plan to experiment making it into a comic. However, I need to bring Vogelfrei 1 to completion first, so V2:W2 might come in a year or two depending on how fast u finish the current book. In sum, this is a sneak peek of some characters that will make a later appearance. (it ails me that I have to wait months before I get to use these goobers 😩)

Again, if there are any questions or comments, all are welcome and appreciated! Though this story will be published waaaaay later because I planned this thing like those 5 year plans under communism regimes.

Honestly, with my current writing speed, we might see it finished in 5 years when the evil Cheeto and his Hairless Elongated Muskrat explode.

[ren-054]

Ren pls give us more OHSHC OC lore I know it’s 2025 but cringe is dead and I use to write Ouran fic on ff. net back when I was in middle school and seeing your art makes me feel like trying again someday ;w;

:OOOOOOOO oooughg hehehehejs

Hmm idk where to start with the lore ahhhaidjs

Get ready because this post is gonna be a long one!!

✨First off, I guess, I called it Size XS in my drafts (although I’m probably like an M/medium in Japan but we’re ignoring that) because the Premise of the story was that Honey/Hani and I are roughly the same size so I realized (at 18 when I started thinking about Ouran again) that he and I could share clothes!

Screenshot from my part one of my rough draft (it’s never gonna get cleaned up into a proper fanfic so sorry about that pfpf)

✨The OC/self insert in question I named Ren Kinugasa (they/she) and they’re designed to be transmasculine but don’t realize it yet so they still see themselves as a girl to some extent. I also kind of wanted to “maintain” the ambiguous transness contained in the show so yeah ^^

✨She also came in as a scholarship (maybe from a lottery system?) student as a music prodigy. They’re a little more well off than Haruhi but not by that much (only enough that their parents could afford to order the female uniform, much to their dismay). They were admitted to the school for their talent with the violin, which is what made them end up searching for a music room actually akdjks

✨Ren was transferred in as a third year (given that they’re 18) and they’re already introverted enough so they don’t have any friends. They get introduced like any other side character does but then they get absorbed into the main cast >:3333 (their problem for their introductory “episode” being that they’re jealous of Haruhi having access to a male uniform, so Honey steps in and offers to lend a spare of his)

✨I set up the story so it’s sort of aligned with the anime, not long after Haruhi gets into the host club. Also! Ren looks up to Haruhi a TON, even if they’re older than her. They’re not necessarily besties or anything, but they get along and bond over being gender ambivalent and pouncing on sales for convenience store snacks. Tamaki also thinks this is great.

I probably shouldn’t make this post too long but I wanna try and get to the main bits ahhh

✨Ren is sorta shipped with everyone (like Haruhi but I split the boys/had Ren and Haruhi sorta “share” some of them indirectly) with a focus on Honey/Hani (we’ll get into this), Mori, and the twins

OKAY so the Hani thing. I know he’s the “boy lolita” but my whole thing that made me write this in the first place is that Hani is a third year and he was (and still is) my height at 18. I felt a connection with him and his whole thing about embracing his more playful side after overcompensating and avoiding things that made him happy. The connection is STRONG in my mind, even though I didn’t really feel it when I first watched the anime. Also he’s close to Mori and I had (and still kinda have) a huge crush on Mori.

✨(As an anime-only watcher sorry) I desperately wanted to explore Honey’s character more while trying to maintain his playful nature, sort of like a writing challenge? I wanted to view him more as an equal, basically. I wrote him as an equal and a friend in my fic, which was nice :]

I have the relationships with the others figured out too and Ren’s interaction with Some side characters, AND I even figured out what trope/niche they’d fill in within the host club which I was excited about (they get shunted as another boy lolita with extra steps, but that’s just show business, babey /lh)

(Sorry but there’s so much text in the last image, I may finish giving these alt texts later—)

There’s so much but this post is already long enough _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

I may make another post going more in-depth but seeing this ask made me so excited to share this HEHEHEHAJDJKSKD

so thank you and have a nice day :3

[safe-from-sharp-teeth]

Ayo! I haven't answered asks in FOREVER, so it's time for some spring cleaning :) Also answering other stuff, like what I've been up to.

If you sent an ask and it's not here, sorry! I may have deleted it because the prompt required too much work of me and I wasn't feeling it, or I was uncomfortable.

Let's gooooo !

Firstly - where have I been? Work REALLY picked up in a way I wasn't expecting over the last...4 months? I was working double and often triple the hours I was used to. With work, vacations, random illnesses, and many video games I got a bit too obsessed with, this blog took a backseat. Plus, sometimes I get disinterested in vore when obsessed with something else. Sometimes, that lasts months, and it did this time.

But now I can confirm that work will FINALLY chill for a long period of time. I'm free! And more motivated than ever! Wahoo! Thanks for your support ALWAYS.

Next big question - when am I going to do more of my story? The one with Asyr? AHHHHHGHHGHH this story has consumed my life. I think about it daily. I dream about it. And yet I'm not as comfortable writing as I am drawing, so writing is a slow process that my perfectionist ass struggles with. I can assure you that there is a story in the works - and I am working on it at a snail's pace.

Okay, ask time...

@ponyluvesonic09 AYO maybe I'll make a full ghost pred pros/con list for you, because that sounds awesome! Kir//by is one of the silliest canon preds out there. Honestly getting eaten by him would be like getting vored by a vacuum, LOL. Galaxy tummy!! Imagine a prey floating around in one of those item bubbles all grumpy. Thank u for the ask, this is good stuff.

no. ( /・・)ノ

UWAGHHHHH I LIKE HER!!! Never played O/verwat/ch but what a gem!! I have a random fondness for centaur-like preds nowadays. She looks so cozy. THANK U I LOVE HER!!!

@tiger9o0 I have not played r//ain w//orld or know what it's about, LOL. Looks like a platformer? Man, I'm terrrriiiiibblleee at those. But whoever this is on the cover, I LIKE EM. A+. (That might not answer ur question shdjbghkjg SORRY)

@heimkoheimkofan LOVE THAT I GOT THE ROBOT ENJOYERS AFTER THAT ONE POST....YES yall are so right and I'm so wrong for just hard metal robot tums. I will rectify my mistake soon I PROMISE. Also oh! You were the one asking about stomachs other than elemental ones! IVE HAD THAT IN MY DRAFTS FOREVER IM SORRY AHHHH. I REALLY love your imagination with tums and you've inspired me to think of some awesome environments! THANKS

@fastfur07 BWAH?? Ugh I'm all over the place when it comes to art. Some pieces take 30 min (like the zangooc I drew at the top of this post), most take 2 days. Some really hard drawings like my wolf bat creechur from a few months ago and my shrimp from last year took a month. THANK U??

We're going back so far that I think this is about my naga oc (which I'm in the midst of redesigning cough cough). For him, he would never tolerate being prey, extremely unwilling bahaha. In general, I haven't thought much about naga or snake prey! I get the appeal of slurping up a noodle, but I just prefer human prey :)

@fastfur07 you fiend, you always give me the best drawing ideas. UNFORTUNATELY, I didn't have time to draw something for this one. BUTTTT....

(i've had this next one in my drafts for forever)

then i had a silly comic. I'll post the wip here because I won't finish it, so enjoy bahaha.

@blizzaria123-blog THANK U im rapidly melting into a puddle from ur words

@mrpotatomanversionsix relevant. i will continue drawing them 4 u

?!??!!??!?!??!?!?!??!?!? how dare u enter my ask box with this blasphemy

@sfwsillynoms WAH!!! you!!! I'm currently redesigning my naga oc but when I finish I'll tag you, if you're still around! And he can 100% be drawn with ur preysona :)

@mystorl i am SO late to this, but SMART. I like it. I shall give my lil guy this friend. I just want to let u know that I see this and it's wonderful and I will do something abt it.

I remember this ask made me laugh a ton when I first got it. thank u. idk why I find this so funny

@sillylilprey IM CRYING RIGHT BACK AHHHH this is an ancient ask, but thank u! hope you're still enjoying!

@terrytheinsane finally, the last ask in my askbox. I love it. You have been wronged with how long it took me to answer you. I have gained knowledge from your ask. THANKS

AND THAT'S IT!! Thanks guys, I hope to make you proud! Feel free to send more asks, and hopefully I will answer in a TIMELY manner.

Goodnight! And remember: Nice Vore ᕕ༼⌐■-■༽ᕗ

[bleue-flora]

just realized i’ve been following your work for over 2 and a half years

Wait… really?! Have I even been here that long? Wow. You must have been here from the beginning then. Well, for real, thank you for sticking around and supporting me. :) It’s been a crazy ride, anon, and I’m glad I have been able to entertain you along the way. <3 <3 <3

Yeah, I just checked and looks like I posted the first chapter of my first ever fanfiction on November 5, 2022 after being encouraged by @monsoonrays to post the scene I wrote of Dream’s Twitter space scrapped lore because I just wanted to know what it could have been like and since I didn’t find many people writing it, I decided to do it myself lol. I didn’t necessarily plan on sharing it though, it was more so just for me and I never intended to write more, the other three chapters just kinda happened after the Las Nevadas stream gave me staged duo brain rot (I’ve never recovered)…

But ya know I figured maybe what’d be really fun to look at, now that we’re getting all nostalgic, is my very first draft just to see how far I’ve come and just to say, don’t let your grammar or verbiage or whatever keep you from writing, because you can edit, and improve, and get help, and ya know it’s also okay to have scuffed grammar or not be the best writer. For years I didn’t write because I thought I couldn’t, that I was bad at it, that I wasn’t creative enough, that my grammar and spelling were too bad to be a writer. And now, despite adhd, dyslexia, and a reading comprehension disorder, I have posted 182,135 words to ao3. In large part thanks to y’all’s support and encouragement and appreciation. <3 <3 So, to anyone who needs to hear this, don’t let your weaknesses hold you back. I thought I couldn’t write, I thought I couldn’t draw people, I thought I couldn’t make a cool YouTube video. And yet, here I am, over 2 years later, with 4 figure art pieces, 9 ao3 posted works and a couple cool YouTube videos (not to mention a crap ton of Tumblr essays lol…)

And without further or do let’s go back to the beginning, back to my brain in October 2022, during the height of senior engineering midterms and still recovering from a concussion…

Scrapped Lore - Ch 1 of Hell in a Box

————————————————————

Thoughts racing in his head as he follows the coords his ally has provided. The gentle wind brushing surprisingly cold sand against his armor. A feeling of confidence and protection engulfing him with his netherite. His smug grin hidden under the mask. He didn’t have this before. Let’s see how Quackity does in a fair fight. Before he knows it, he’s arrived at his destination. A stair case before him leading to what appears to be an underground base. Quackity’s name tag is below, so Dream enters. Despite the growing unease in his chest. Despite the fear creeping its way up his body. He ignores the warnings of the inside voice telling him to run, as he pursues, revenge consuming his mind.

He makes his way down the stairs into the darkness and before he can even think or take in his surroundings, it’s raining potions, the all too nostalgic sound of glass shattering, running a shiver down his back. Weakness. Blindness. Nausea. Harming. His knees buckle, his body collapses. The world appears to be spinning as if tilted on its axis. His vision begins to go dark, and he just hopes that what he sees is a drug caused hallucination. That the rough dark obsidian and the old familiar room is just his mind running with panic, playing tricks on him, joining the chemicals swimming through his veins. It wasn’t.

Slowly Dream’s mind begins to make its way back to consciousness and into his body. Before he opens his eyes, he can feel the thick coarse texture of rope wound tight against his skin. From head to toe he’s tied in a cruel-fully painful manner. In what seems to be a rather excessive amount of rope. Almost as if the person or persons were deeply afraid of his escape. They are right of course to be afraid. He’s not the bloody, weak, frail thing he was in prison. Well not completely, anyways. Around his neck, lies rope tightly attached to his hands, constraining a good amount of his already limited air flow. Adding to the anxiety and panic making its way through his lungs. He’s completely restricted in his attempts to escape, all movement tugging at the rope around his neck. He can’t breathe. His hands pulled through the wooden bars of the back of a chair, tied behind him and the oh so nostalgic feeling of the wooden chair beneath him. Well, ain’t this familiar. It’s not made for torture though, no armrests to bind his hands for removing nails, no smell of blood stains on the wood. Yet. But it’s not The chair, and as pathetic as it sounds he can’t help but be a little comforted by that fact. That observation keeping him sane. It’s not the same. It’s not the same. It’s not the same. He’s not back. He made it out. He’ll make it out again. Maybe.

Thrown out of his thoughts, he realizes that he can hear voices. Through his head is pounding headache, a likely result from the shear about of drugs in his system, he can make out the distinct voice of Quackity and Sam speaking on what to do with him. What he wouldn’t give to never hear their voices again. Never hear his name from their lips. Yet here he is, again, tied to a godforsaken chair ready for another session with his tormentors. Armor-less. Alone. Helpless. It’s like nothing has changed, his weeks of healing vanished at the scene. He can’t make out the whole conversation but focusing he make out, “Should we just kill him?…Can’t put him back now….We should kill him the same way he did you…Don’t you want revenge, Sam?...I say it’s time for someone else to lose an eye to a fucking pickaxe!... Let’s do it with the same one, his, oh the irony!...” His ears specifically pick up the all too familiar, sadistic gleeful tone of Quackity, sending an involuntary shutter through him. As he feared, they’re going to kill him. What a waste, months of torture, isolation, starvation and for what? For them to put him out of his misery now. What’s the point? It can’t have all been for nothing! He can’t have made it through this year, just to die here, bound to this chair at the scene of his endless nightmares, like he never left.

He hears footsteps leading away from him, an angry yet cheerful rhythm that he immediately recognizes as Quackity. Despite the circumstances, he can’t help but feel relief at the distance gained between him and his torturer. The nostalgic sound of redstone activating, signaling his exit, and probably bringing down the lava wall.

Reluctantly Dream’s eyes open and he peaks with a sense of dread washing over him. Please don’t let it be real. Please be a dream. Unfortunately, to his dismay, a lava wall falls before him, blocking his exit, the far too reminiscent sound of its loud flow buzzing in his ears. Oh, how he wishes it would stop! Oddly, he’s not sure how to feel. If he should be horrified to be trapped yet again by the warm liquid or glad that it’s blocking out Quackity. But he can’t help but feel relieved. The familiar lava, his twisted form of protection, yet again. Not that it’ll last.

He’s positioned in the middle of the cell room and his initial observations prove his suspicions correct. Oh, how he wishes he was wrong. The chest, the cauldron, the purple tears falling from the ceiling, even the crying obsidian seems to be placed in the exact same spots. He would know. It’s all a bit too real, too reminiscent. He can feel the rough obsidian pressed against the soles of his scarred bare feet. It can’t be the vault though. He has the key, it’s his. His hell turned home. His vulnerability turned protection. He’s not afraid. It doesn’t matter. It’s not the room he fears it’s his situation. And yet, he can’t help but feel the dread and fear crawl its way through him at the sight of the replica before him.

Taking in his surroundings, he hears the other pair of boots grumpily trot closer until what he knows to be Sam is standing rather close to him. Sam hasn’t noticed he’s awake yet, or he is ignoring him. He has mastered that skill after all. He never listened before. He never gave into mercy while hearing his screams. But he’s not the same Sam. He’s not the Warden anymore. This is different! There’s a chance.

So, as a last straw to save his neck once again, he thinks up what to say. Manipulation is his strength after all, even if he’s minutes away from a full blow panic attack, Even if it’s life or death. Oh, how this feels like de ja vou. He made Sam his bitch after all, he can do this.

Breaking the comfortable silence, Dream mumbles still kinda out of it, “S-Sam…”

Sam’s head immediately whips around, to him, locking his gaze. Meeting the crazed smily mask sending an involuntary shutter down his spine at the sight of his murderer. That’s quickly accompanied by a satisfied grin making its way up his face at the man’s predicament.

“Look—look who’s awake!… Dream, the most 'powerful' man on the server, bound helplessly to a chair, again. Who’s the idiot now?” Sam smirks back.

Despite his words, Dream can see the uneasiness in his form, his facial expressions not fully matching his words. Ignoring Sam’s bait, Dream instead causally asks, tone smooth and surprisingly calm, “How—how have you been Sam?”

Sam rightfully taken aback by the friendly coolness in Dream’s tone, looks at the man again, vision a bit blurry at the sight of the haunting smile. Without realizing he mindlessly utters, “Good I guess… I mean—What do you—?… You—you killed me Dream! What do you mean how have I been?” His confused tone turning loud and angry with great momentum.

Unfazed by the revelation, Dream reasons back, voice steady, despite the slight tremor in his hands and the suppressed flinch at the raised voice, “To—to be fair… I only killed you once and you know, you can be hurt about it, but that—that was justified. You abused your power over me in prison, so I took a life. Quackity took time out of his day to visit me, for months, just to inflict pain and misery” Joyfully fulfilling his cruelest fantasies. Doing unspeakable things that not even the darkest nightmares could come up with. Things not even Dream would have ever considered. The Unfathomable, Indescribable, creativity in making hell on earth. “So you know, I came here to kill him…” Dream pauses, Quackity’s name on his tongue sending involuntary shivers down his back and a hitch in his shallow breath. He doesn’t say how he’s just hoping this will help him sleep through the night for once. Or how he’s desperately grasping at something to mend his broken mind and body. How he’s trying to feel safe instead of afraid.

Finding his voice again, “All of us—all of us have our reasons. You know, we are all right from our point of view… But I would say that—that the books are balanced between us. You know, I’ve left you alone. I released you from Tubbo’s imprisonment. I fed you steak, cake and even—even golden apples when they left you to starve. You know, I haven’t destroyed anything on the server. I haven’t imprisoned or tortured or waged war. All I’ve done is try and live, hunted down like—like an animal by the entire server.”

“Oh come on, Dream, don’t act all innocent. We both know you’re not.”

Annoyed, Dream responds coolly, “Innocent? No one’s innocent, Sam. Not—not you. Not me. Not Quackity. N-not anyone! You know, we all have enemies. We’ve all wronged each other for our own reasons. But I’m not your enemy. I’m not the—not the bad guy. I’m not—I’m not pure evil.”

“So you say... I should— I should just what?… Let you go because you 'let me off easy' because you’re not—not evil?…” Sam’s voice rising again, ebbing with mock pity. A stroke of anger burning in him, “You haven’t—you haven’t yet? As if that’s a comfort! As if that washes your slate clean! As if I can leave here and not fear you coming after me, the rest of the server… and T-Tommy! As if—as if you didn’t murder me while I was defenseless, after I gave you access to the prison!”

Dream suppresses a wince from the tone and for the briefest moment fear, panic and anger pass across his face. No one notices.

In a much more hushed defeated tone Dream somewhat desperately voices, “You know. he’s—he’s going to kill me, Sam.”

Silence falls between the two for a brief moment, before Dream continues, “He’s going to—he’s going to take my last life… and you know unlike your death, he’s going to drag it out to a painfully slow degree. Butchering me like I’m—I’m nothing but a cow for his dinner… I’m a person, Sam, a member of this smp. I may—I may not be the 'good guy' b—but you know I’m not the big bad they make me out to be and neither are you.”

“I’m not like you! Of course, I’m—I’m not the bad guy!” Sam states firm, voice shaking from that last insinuation.

Dream lowers his head, the yelling is really not helping his ponding headache nor his panic. It’s all a bit too familiar to everyday in his cell. Him trying to reason with the Warden Sam for any spec of mercy. Being denied because ‘he deserves it.’ He made the rules of the prison after all.

Another moment of silence passes between them. Dream barely keeping at bay the sense of dread rising through him, the feeling of defeat and hopelessness washing over him. His hindered breath becoming more and more labored as his body holds still, waiting for what’s to come. He’s running out of time and Sam wasn’t budging, not that Dream’s surprised. Just as stubborn as always in his righteousness and fury. Still intent on allowing the walls to be painted with Dream’s blood for his wrongdoings.

His panic just continues to get worse the longer he’s here. Trapped in a perfect replica of the cell that backdrops the scenes of his never ending nightmares. He wonders if maybe insanity has really taken him over. Maybe Punz was right that one can only endure so much before they crack. That people have limits before they break. Because right now he can’t help but smile. Maybe it’s the lack of oxygen making it to his brain. Maybe it’s because he’s finally greeting death like a friend. Maybe because he too can see the sadistic irony of his situation. Maybe because what else can he do after all, that’s what his mask made him, a smile. Nothing more. Nothing further than the smooth white surface. A seemingly sadistic pleasure painted on. No man behind the mask. Just a simple smile for all to see. A monster to haunt nightmares. An emotionless, unfeeling predator without motivations. But don’t predators also have motivations and reasons? Aren’t predators also prey? Don’t snakes bite to protect themselves and their nest? Not to be cruel but out of necessity and instinct.

Insanity or not, Dream can feel himself slipping into the darkness but he is nothing if not stubborn. He’s nothing if not desperate to live. Even when it would be easier to let go. Even when death would be a mercy. Even at the times when life was endlessly unbearable. He’ll be damned if he lets Sam feel like the good guy in his last moments. If he lets Sam and Quackity keep their hypocritical, self righteous, satisfied smiles at the sight of his misery.

So Dream, face stretching into a grin, mutters under his breath, “P—Prove it.” A challenge, born of desperation and anger.

“W—What?” Sam voices, caught off guard by the end in silence.

“You know, prove that you—that you are not the bad guy!” Dream lifts his head to meet Sam’s gaze and smugly smiles under the mask. Because if he doesn’t he might just let the sobs of fear and despair escape him. An anxiety attack of anguish held back only by his pride. Because if he doesn’t smile, maybe Sam won’t see him as the strong and dangerous monster but as a human being.

“Prove that you aren’t me or Quackity. That you wouldn’t kill an unarmed man to satisfy revenge. That you know—you are good and do things for the good of others... If I —I die today the revive book dies with me. Can you really say that’s for the best? That you know… that—that price is worth paying for revenge?

An deathly silence falls again. Sam pauses in his pacing to look at Dream. Meeting his gaze, Dream can see that Sam’s face shows he’s thinking about and considering something. At the sight, Dream can’t help but feel a fragile hope build in his aching chest. That perhaps today won’t be his last. That perhaps people do change. Perhaps there is such thing as mercy. But he can’t fully embrace it, because he knows he could lose that hope in an instant. The one attachment he could never seem to sever and loses far too often anyways. He clings to it desperately watching Sam’s every movement. Holding in what little oxygen he can get in his lungs, ready to release with either relief or despair.

Sam begins to move again, seemingly making up his decision and pulls out his sword with one smooth movement. Sending uncontrollable panic through Dream. Breathing becoming impossible, mind and sight losing focus as Sam approaches, sword in hand. This is it. Sam’s going to kill him. Perhaps this is the mercy he deserves. Sam will be quicker than Quackity at least. The sword comes up under his chin pushing his head up to face Sam’s glare. He can’t look though he doesn’t want the last thing for him to see to be his former friend’s righteous fury. Disappointment. Disgust. Or whatever emotions clear on his face depicting his intent to kill him off for the last time. A red drop of blood falls slowly down his neck at the sword’s pressure, but then there’s the sound of rope being cut, releasing the painful pressure from around his throat. He finally breathes, looks up, and meets Sam’s eyes. Oh? Is that regret?…pity?… Doesn’t matter. It’s not anger, it’s not self righteous fury, it’s not the look intent on taking one’s final life. If he squints hard enough he can even see his former friend’s gaze. At the sight, Dream can’t help but feel the ghostly warmth of Sam’s hug and smile at the past memories. Of fishing together on the docks of the house he once built. Sam’s laughter and ambitions filling his ears, tearing through his already mangled heart. A brief moment of actually good memories filling his head, a welcomed change. And then it’s gone, a mere second over, Sam’s face replaced with one of determination as he continues to saw through the rest of the ropes, seemingly intent on not nicking Dream with his sword in the process but failing in some places. He’d be lying if despite the ropes being cut, the sword’s proximity was still causing slight panic that only worsened when Sam moves behind him. But then it was over, his hands free, already beginning to regain some feeling in them. Sam turns, flicks a lever the all too nostalgic sound of the lava lowering, opening his way out. Or his torturer’s way in. He turns to Sam who’s not making eye contact with him, and whispers a hushed hesitant, “thank you” before bolting out of the room.

Not wanting to test his luck any further. He makes his way to the light, just in time too, as he sees Quackity making his way through the desert back to the entrance. He sneaks around, narrowly missing Quackity’s line of sight and speedily goes from corner to corner hiding from sight best he could. He may be out, but he’s still screwed. He has no armor. No weapons. He has nothing. It’s at this point when the panic that subsided comes back full force. The sound of an alarm begins to go off as a message appears in the chat calling for everyone to search Las Nevadas for him. Fuck. Looking around he spots a cave and runs like there’s no tomorrow, because there may not be one toward the nearby cave.

Slumping down the wall as he attempts to pull air into his lungs as fast as possible. Adrenaline and anxiety adding to his already out of shape body making it really hard to breathe. His mind going through a million plans of how to escape the city, when he hears a voice that sends an involuntary shiver down his back. The former president’s propaganda about him ringing in his ears, he spins round to meet Wilbur’s gaze, who whispers confused, “Why are we hiding?”

Here’s the link to read what happens next and the current version which has like another 1000 or so more words cuz ya know, I can’t help but add angst :)

[magic-is-something-we-create]

2023 recap + 2024 plans

i wrote 261,200 words in 2023; 172,500 of those for Whispers, 88,700 for Goddess-Touched!

i read 16 books to completion, beta'd for an additional 2, am currently reading 3, and got partway through 5 others before having to put them down.

i maintained my streaming schedule with only a handful of emergency-related exceptions, and drew, uh, a shit ton over the course of the year!

writing goals for 2024:

fix Echoseers (full stylistic rewrite, along with some plot tweaks)

finish the first draft of Goddess-Touched (and edit it hardcore as well)

work on as-yet-unnamed book 4 of tms

fix up Whispers with the added feedback of beta readers

start querying Whispers (i'll look into self publishing down the road if i don't end up finding an agent. the way my brain functions i must cling to the hope of not having to market it myself tooth and nail for the time being)

POTENTIALLY. if my brain fixates on it. write the script for The Lost so that i actually have something to work with to make the comic happen

one of my offline friends is starting to get into writing, and im hoping to help them through some of the early rough patches and potentially co-write a thing with them!!

i completely dropped the ball on the weekly writing updates so im gonna try and get back to that on wednesday. and potentially get back into the weekly ask games!

non-writing goals for 2024:

youtube. i want to make speedpaints and worldbuilding videos and shit. ive already made the basic animation stuff to have a lil sona to do the gesturing for me and i know how to make videos i just havent done it in a While

twitch!! i want to stream a bit more often because its fun and if i let myself branch out into video games as well as art itll be easier to do that. u might see me streaming in the evenings sometime soon. (psst im not streaming this weekend as im still doing a shit ton of holiday/social stuff but the weekend of the 13th ill be back to both patreon and twitch baybee)

SPEAKING OF i want to get my shit together enough to do like. monthly short story releases for my patrons/ko-fi members. early access, that is, so if i post one in january, it'll be posted here a month or two later for all to see/read

i want to read as many books as i did in 2023, if not more! im also considering adding book reviews/thoughts to youtube or patreon/ko-fi perks

my weekend hiatuses aren't going anywhere. having time where im not actively engaging with tumblr + don't feel obligated to do Anything online has done wonders for my mental health and i highly recommend it. focus mode on my phone and leechblock on desktop has helped so so so much

and that's all i'm sharing here!! i hope 2024 is a better year for all than the last <3

[fallloverfic]

I totally understand where people are coming from when they comment on my Jinx fanfics saying they wish this or that happened in the comic or, amazingly, that Mingwa should take notes or something. I am, however, probably the very wrong person to say this to lol

Mingwa is far and away (obviously) a better writer than I am. And also I adore the manhwa. I have thoroughly enjoyed every single episode, including the ones that came out in the nearly two months since I first read the manhwa, and reread at least parts of it every single day. I know fanfiction can be a fun stopgap between updates, and I'm glad my fics are enjoyable to other folks from that perspective. I get that the manhwa is not going to be everyone's cup of tea, and there are things people want to happen that are not happening (at least yet). I am sympathetic to frustration with the thing you are reading and on some level enjoy and wish were more like what you wanted. I am also interested in analysis of the story and love fanworks for it. And I'm very open to critiquing stuff you enjoy. I love doing it, and it's a great way to better appreciate art (and it's part of why I write fanfiction in the first place).

I am, however, truly not the sympathetic ear for anger about Jinx from a story or character perspective that people seemingly think I am, nor do I wish for my fic comment section to be the dumping ground of such stuff. As I've said with ENNEAD before this, I write the fanfics I do because I love the comic, not because I hate it or its author. Jinx is imperfect - as all art is - and I have criticisms (minor ones, though, like a few art errors or the overuse of stock assets solely in lieu of comic art). But I do not hate the story, the characters, or the direction the plot is going (I have tons of drafts of basically "I really like this thing about Jinx" that I just don't post for my own sanity and time). Maybe that will change, who knows! I liked BJ Alex well enough before I dropped it around the 1/3 mark due to something Dong-gyun did (though I did not like it even close to how much I love Jinx before dropping, and the thing that got me to drop it was good writing and understandable narratively, just also squicky for me). There are things I would like to see happening in the story. But also, there are at least 40 episodes left of the story (if not more, given Mingwa's comment that season 2 would be longer than season 1, and I doubt she meant just 1 episode longer). That's a lot of time for stuff to happen, and even if everything I wanted to happen happened next episode, I'd still be hungrily waiting for the following episode.

My fanfics are for fun, to ease the hungry monster in my head that wishes for more Jinx between updates. Mingwa is pacing the story well, in my opinion, and I trust in her ability to continue to do so. I am, however, less patient in my own writing (in part because I'm in a lot of fandoms and writing several fics at the same time), so I unfortunately kind of rush through things to get to the catharsis faster, which I know would be better served in a longer story. That's fine, because it's fanfic, and obviously it works for more than just me. But Jinx the comic is a lot better than that, which is part of why so many of us love it.

Now excuse me while I return to fic editing and rereading the latest episode another 40 times.

[moltengoldveins]

That TCU post…that is truly one of, if not the greatest thing I’ve ever seen come out of this fandom. I tried my own hand a while back at writing “the dsmp but taken seriously”; gave it a name and a playlist but didn’t really write much before I went back to my other projects. If you ever have the motivation to do more with that outline I’d be honored to be a co-writer or help out in any way, or if you want you could just use my title as a name for the series: A Ballad of Broken Dreams.

holy crap op this is so sweet. Thank you so much. I’m… wow ok. That. Wow. Thank you. That’s legitimately so kind and I’m so glad you enjoyed it XD. Id also Love to see your playlist and your thoughts behind the songs if you’re down?! That sounds awesome :D

funnily enough, I’ve had a drafted outline for this heccin thing running around in my head since the Butcher Army arc. Right around when SAD-ist dropped her animatic, I simultaneously realized ‘oh wow, I Adore this concept’ and ‘oh wow, I Highly doubt the CCs are gonna manage to do this the way I’d want to see it’ and lo and behold: I was correct. So painfully correct. (There were also People Involved whom I had Really Bad Feelings About from very early on that, sure enough, turned out to be exactly what i thought they were, rip) So the Emduo prequels, Icarus heccin Dying, and the end of Axe of Peace have been around for Ages.

I’d honestly love to do more with this concept, (i am designing movie posters as we speak) but due to Chronic Illness Pog I’m in a rather unstable financial situation? And don’t have a ton of free time for art. Any big projects are gonna take a While, or id need to find a way to use it or something adjacent to fund, y’know, Rent. That being said, I’m definitely writing the emduo prequels, both as movie scripts and as novels, as those are the films focused on, yknow, My Bois. I also think it’d be hilarious to release the novels and then the scripts and watch people Loose Their Minds over the ‘inaccurate adaptation >>:(‘

I’d absolutely love to work with other people in the fandom on this stuff, though I’ve never been the best at directly co-writing (my writing method and style is painfully specific (ie needlessly poetic) and I’m very autistic: I don’t like it when people touch that Specific Thing) but literally anything else? Im open ears. I love collabs.

and finally, I adore your name for the series, (excellent word choice there /srs, it fits perfectly with the symbolism of the whole story) and I think it works really Really well for the actual DSMP, but if I’m entirely honest… I’m not sure it fits the TCU? Like genuinely I’m so grateful for the suggestion, I love when people offer ideas and bounce things around like that. But one of the main things I tried to do with this concept was work out how the story could actually end Well. A deep-seated belief in the good-but-fallen nature of man, the importance of hope, and the inevitability of redemption kinda comes part and parcel with the whole Being-A-Christian Thing (if it doesn’t, you’re missing the Whole Point Of The Bible) and while the actual DSMP may have ended in broken dreams… this doesn’t. That was my first thought when writing that outline: This Is Going To End Well. Not for wish-fulfillment reasons, not because I’m naive or I don’t like bad endings, but because fundamentally, everything sad is a lie, and if the story has ended in tragedy, it hasn’t ended yet.

If I had to pick a series name now, I’m not sure what I’d pick. A part of me balks at referencing anything popularized by Our Local Redacted, but ‘unfinished symphony’ wasn’t his in the first place, it was from Hamilton. “The Finished Symphony” has a cool ring to it? I dunno. If anyone else has ideas please feel free to toss them in here aight, I’m not settling on anything for a While.

Anyways, thanks for Ted talking with me, drink water 💜

[eemamminy-art]

1, 2, 4, 6, 8, and 9 for the fic writer asks!

1. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered fics?

At this point, I think I prefer multi-chapter! In oneshots it's like, 2k - 5k words or so, and that's it so you gotta make it count. I found I would be agonizing over word choice and flow and how technically good the writing itself was more than just trying to tell a compelling story. In a multi-chapter fic, it's far too long to worry about every little paragraph or sentence, so I can see the big picture and focus on other things :3 Not to say I don't care about phrasing in multi-chapter too, but I think I'm more likely to seek out repeated themes and motifs than just seeking to make punchy lines. Like for example, in my stardew long fic, I have a repeated mention of movie cliches and tropes when Alex is agonizing over how to express his feelings, to show that he isn't personally all that experienced in relationships and looks to outside sources to model the behavior. And also to tie it off nicely with a particular scene that's related to that same theme (yet to be posted, I don't wanna spoil it! You'll see very soon, like in a few weeks from now)

2. Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?

For oneshots, I write as I go. In my multi-chapter fic, I have an outline of the entire story-- all 68 chapters of it!! My friend who is an excellent writer and I hold in really high regard with this stuff showed me how he does his outlines which is as an excel spreadsheet?? 👀 Totally rocked my world, so I've been able to easily visualize and plan out everything I want to put into my story! And I can also include data like word count or planned posting schedule dates, and I have separate tabs in the spreadsheet to keep track of things like ages and birthdays too!

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

I get a lot of my ideas when I'm waking up/falling asleep or doing something that doesn't require much thought. Some aspects of drawing don't really take up brain space for me so at times I'll be rendering or something and an idea just hits me out of nowhere! But it's usually when I'm waking up or half asleep still that I get the most of my ideas!

6. Do you have your work beta'd? How important is this to your process?

I don't, mostly because I'm a perfectionist but also because a lot of good stuff happens when I'm editing. Often times I will add literally hundreds of extra words even on a third or fourth pass of editing, and I just feel like it wouldn't work out as nicely if it was a beta reading it over and maybe giving me feedback.

8. Do you prefer the beginning, middle, or end of a story?

Middle! I'm honestly so bad with endings. I have a ton of oneshots sitting half-finished in my google drive that are just like. Total banger ideas that maybe even I worked out a beginning for, but I have NO clue how to wrap it up. I think this is obvious in how I open and close chapters in my long fic too, there's a lot of cold opens and then ending on like, idk, some dialog or something haha

As it is I've been already working on the ending to my long fic, because I know it's gonna take a lot of work to iron it out to be just what I envision it to be, so the finale is on I think the third draft currently and still a long way off from being done. But I'm being prepared so I don't hit a snag in a few months down the line when I get to it!!

9. Do you comment on stories you read?

Always!! I read very infrequently because I have difficulty reading, so whenever I do read something, I always make sure to leave a comment! I like to compliment and encourage others! I try to always leave a nice comment in the tags when reblogging art as well, it just feels good to me :3

Get to know your fic writer! Ask meme

[corpupine]

Alright, finally getting to those other Ask(s) I said I would do. First of all, really awesome to come back here and see more NemaTale updates! Already in Ch5, and if my count is correct, if you count the prologue. With all the Comic parts released you are either almost at 100 parts, are at 100 parts, or a bit over 100 parts. Either way, Nematale is around 100 comic parts released and that is awesome! More in other Ask(s). Sorry.

You don't have to apologize at all for long/multiple asks! I LOVE analyses of my work, and it's so fun to interact with people who've read it and have questions/theories/what have you! I'm just going to put my answers, and the subsequent asks, under the read more on this post, so it doesn't get too long for people's dashes :)

Yes, it is so fun to be posting again as well! Gosh, that's crazy to think about--so many parts, but also so many individual pages! I've learned a TON from making this comic, the first thing being that it really is NEVER the wrong time to start a comic haha. I have grown LEAPS and bounds as an artist and a person since starting this comic, and I never would have grown in that way if I hadn't just started making the comic even when I didn't know much about anatomy, or color, or even digital drawing in general! So every part I've released is just evidence to me of my own growth and accomplishment. My degree is in publishing, and someday I would love to print NemaTale in several volumes because I LOVE having physical copies of my work and I want to celebrate how far I've come! That might not be for a little while though.

YES that crossover comic by @xjunjox was SUCH a sweet surprise! It's crazy, because I had not read any of Spirit (which is a wonderful, completed Undertale comic for the uninitiated of you) until AFTER I finished making Chapter 2 of NemaTale, which means Nema's design was totally set and I'd drawn her several hundred times, and then one day I went on deviantArt and was like "ooh, an Undertale comic with a female OC? She's freaking adorable AND BLONDE?? OH SHE'S SO SWEET--" and now that's one of my favorite UT comics :)) 💙💙

Similarly with The First Human, I think SO highly of @brittninja ! Marine is an EXCELLENT character, and Britt's art is phenomenal. We haven't interacted much in a while, but I'm so pleased that so many people are reading her comic! She deserves every bit of her audience and more🩵🩵

Anyway, all that to say, it is so fun how we have ended up with characters that have similar designs, yet they behave so differently when presented with certain choices! I love what you said about how you can tell why each character has the SOUL type they have. For me, Nema's soul type being kindness was very intentional, and I 100% agree with the reasoning behind both Fae and Marine's soul colors. I think you learn a lot about a character from the choices they make when presented with a certain situation. It's also important to note that all those soul traits have their own strengths and weaknesses! The comic will go into this more as we get further in, but if you'll indulge me: one of the reasons I chose kindness as Nema's soul trait was that I find it to be fascinating and sometimes contradictory. She can be kind to a fault, but...how does she do at letting people see the real her? How does she react when no matter what she does, someone simply does not like her?

How good is she, really, at being kind to herself? 💚💚

(I cut out the first part of the next question regarding Sans, Flowey, Karma, and LV/EXP, because I wanted to make a separate post regarding my thoughts! I hope that's okay. I'll answer the rest here!)

Flowey is definitely a tricky guy! Fun fact, an early draft of Chapter 5 had Flowey visiting Nema to taunt her, not Sans. It was actually a last-minute change because I realized that provided a LOT more dramatic tension for the narrative, plus who doesn't love a good Sans and Flowey interaction? It was the perfect pinch point for Flowey to show up and...sow the seeds of discord, heheh.

whoops, think I was just possessed by the spirit of Sans there for a second, my apologies. :3

I tried and tried to upload this screenshot as it was originally sent to me, but for some reason one of those words just came out...corrupted. Sorry about that! I'm sure it's fine!

Thank you for the compliment! I'm really proud of how that chapter cover turned out, it really evokes the feeling that I wanted this chapter to have. Some of the scenes coming up in this chapter are my favorite in the whole comic so far, so I'm excited to share them with you all!

That's the great thing about siblings, they're always down to kick you in the butt when you're being a jerk! And who knows what Sans is thinking or planning? That monster's an enigma...

Your comment about Nema being sad and guilt-driven makes me so happy, that was exactly what I was trying to get across! We don't know all of her motivations or backstory yet, but you are right on the money with one thing: Nema doesn't think very highly of herself. (Hence her saying to Flowey in Chapter One, "I'm nobody...")

My favorite thing to write is complicated and occasionally toxic relationships! Is Nema really the best person to help the underground? How can she help them, really? These are important questions to ask...and ones we might not get a full answer to for a good long while, haha! I know, I'm the worst >:)

Thanks for sending these messages! I loved getting to dig down deep and answer them all. Hope you have a great holiday, and the same for everyone who celebrates! :)

[thelocalmuffin]

Hello everyone! I wanted to share my accomplishments in 2023 before the year ends with a little bit of self reflection notes. You can enjoy everything in the read below.

Some fandoms highlighted include DGS, nintendo, and pokemon.

First off, this year has been hard for me. It's been a lot of self reflection and figuring my goals out after some became unattainable.

With that being said, I did accomplish a lot this year. I published my first recipe in a zine, finishing my first zine, improved my writing a lot, and picked up drawing once again. I also was able to get some actual help with some issues I have struggled with for years.

I want thank you all for your support. It means a lot that you enjoyed my artworks, writing, and ambition. Now here are my highlights for each month.

January: Foxtrot - An Asoryuu kitsune AU. One of the stories I took in when I was at my lowest last year and sparked a lot of my interest to keep writing. Plus Kitsune Kazuma.

February: Encore - A hassius story about motivation and being patient about the creation process. Though this was more or less my thoughts on this topic in general, this story literally inspired me to take my own advice and pick up drawing again.

March: The Memories that Lie - This was one I actually finished, but am glad I did. It's an asoryuu vampire story I was actually planning on scrapping, but ended up finishing anyway out of sheer stubbornness. To finish it, it took me completely restarting five chapters, but it came out a lot better than the original draft had mapped out.

April: This is when I took my hiatus and started to draw again in my free time. I was worn out, stressed, and collapsing under the pressure. This was my first piece that I posted.

May: Was a huge month for me. I launched the @blossominglovezine that you can enjoy here and published my first recipe in The Grand Adventure to Make the Perfect Cake for the @tgaacspringzine

June: I made my first icon! I was really busy this month planning for the trip of my dreams and doing some irl side work that ended up being permanent employment.

July: So I went to Las Vegas for a foodie tour. When I had a moment, I decided to draw the lovely Unicorn Goddess outfit.

August: This is when I did the Timmverse art study. This month was more of finishing up some logistics of zine work and getting a story out in the wild.

September: Goes to the Princess Peach Showtime piece I did! This piece really cemented my current style. And yes, I keep calling it Princess Peach Spotlight. Also wanted to mention I helped successfully launch the @dgscrimezine

October: Goes to my OC piece. CW for blood, but this piece was made for Halloween and the shading was really on point. I love this design for this OC.

November: I'm going with the fact I completed a ship week, asoryuu week. I got everything done at a reasonable time and was able to create so many fun pieces. 1 2 3 4 5 7. I had to skip day 6 because I ended up having an emergency. I also started pre-orders for my first for purchase zine, @desire-asoryuu-zine. This is still in pre-orders, so I wasn't sure if I was going to add it, but this is a big accomplishment for me.

December: I actually haven't been able to do much this month due to the holidays and getting distracted by Pokemon DLC, but I did draw this super cute Yuma!

Other highlights do include being accepted to multiple zine projects as a mod and contributor, which has been very exciting for me. You can check out that list here.

This upcoming year, I'll be helping with more projects and the @aawlwminibang events! I really want to do a personal project that I've been building up my skills for before pursuing, but now I think I'll be able to handle it. I won't announce it yet since it's still very much in development, but I hope I can in 2024.

Thank you all for your support this year. It has meant a ton.

[madfantasy]

Good morning

I have have barely awakened today and have no energy, nothing. I know I am in constant burnout and learning more and more about being on the spectrum means brought so much sense to my world and equal sorrow. I have tons of drafts waiting to be posted, pre written cuz I know I clock out on words pretty easily and can only communicate in specific times, something that I have never taken account of before.

Understanding now, my highs are the highest, and my lows are the lowest, and there's no in between.. I can't see a point of pretending to be okay having nothing to hope for, no work, no stability, no aspirations.

I didn't have work this month, my net is up on the 26th so there's no time, I suppose it doesn't matter in comparison to other issues.

● I love using tumblr, it's the only place I feel safe but it been years now and I still yet to gain followers. Tiktok flopped too and much more highly demanding and traitorous that I fell out off line even longer. And on twitter I do the post and dash because being there is absolute.. sigh

Just look at this. It was trending "boycottW*tsapp" I thought it was another breach of privacy, but no. New reminders to me that my life has no point because it's so willingly stupid & embarrassing and it should be kept a seceret

At least my highs are still high, I enjoyed drawing so much lately. Seeing my art gallery grow and hoping to draw with others too

● But even my art been plaguing me

The fact that I have to do something to hope for growth then work, is basically starting over again. I've always posted my ocs before and they never harnessed me any rewards, not until my one lucky post of a fanart got noticed.

I thought to start calling my art "dark art" ofc its a nod to Sev and his knowledge in em, is also a nod to the hek I gone through to keep drawing. Isn't that gothicly romantic? C:

At any rate, I have few more fanarts left to do, and I shall be focusing on that for now

Thank u for being with Mani still, I wish you the best of everything dears, sending all my love 🍀💛

8.30 am, 23.6.2023 - drinking my coffee conservatively xc

[cozymochi]

🌻 >:)

IM FOUND ONE OF THESE MEMES IN MY DRAFts! Im gonna rank my experiences in the major fandoms i’ve engaged with.

🩵 YUGIOH! - Second longest running fascination. Upside!! Made life long friends. DOWNSIDE!! Was my first go at online engagement and in those 10 years so much happened that I still can’t help but feel a little sour. …Though ygo back in the day wasn’t good at tag comments, so I didn’t even know those were a thing for years until I branched out. 5/10. But grows to a 7/10 because i’ve settled into a niche area with so few people that it’s now a silly little club. 💕

🧡 Dragon Ball/Z - GENUINE CHAOS. Started off slow but intensified hard cuz get who got involved while Super was airing??? (I didn’t watch it lol), so the discourse and fighting was at an all time high. I have no idea how I even survived this in retrospect. My slight association with people netted me troll asks and my liking of Yamcha also set me up for those. …and frequent art reposting, and quite a few bizarre interactions. Pretty sure my art and edits have circulated more in latin america than I even know. This was also pre-tumblr purge so the amount of nsfw that got thrown my way is… something. That said!! Made also really good friends 💕 and DB/Z probably desensitized me to longer form discussions. 5/10 for insanity, but 8/10 for good reception and VERY PEAK and generous humans.

I think dbz hardened me.

💚 Invader Zim- started off fun (mostly irl with my friendo from days of YGO), but quickly devolved into territory that tested my patience. WHY ON EARTH THIS SERIES’ CONSUMERS had such a huge morality high ground base is beyond me. It’s this fandoms fault I learned about certain modern day online discourse terms and what instilled an irrational posting fear for a year lol. Fun at first and there’s super creative and receptive folk (then those people got kicked out) and left the most insufferable beings imaginable. There’s no in between. Shoutout to all 3 friends made who are still peak. 3/10, if I ever finish any remaining projects or decide to bite the bullet and show completed work, i’m not engaging again. The base just skews somewhere I can’t handle. Which is crazy given the ABOVE contenders have, on paper, done so much more.

dbz hardened me but iz weakened me. Which is probably why i need the formers bootcamp back. Don’t think I’m as fearful now, but i’ll still be salty.

💜 Twisted Wonderland - this is a work in progress experience. Will require further evaluation if all of the above experiences haven’t set my standards. Will stay in my corner. So far it’s 6/10 in vibes (they’re much calmer than the last one), tho I question how much of the interest is from what i do vs. what I did for others. Haven’t shared a ton of opinions yet and god knows lol we don’t want that /s. Still recovering from the former making me wanna just not do much. Baby steps I suppose.

💙 - Sonic The Hedgehog: This is a cheat, I have never interacted with the fandom directly (purely by happenstance, so thankfully no traces exist), but I have been into this since I was a child with no issues. So by default this is the best one. 10/10, didn’t engage, but I do lurk. Though all the stuff I see on tweeter isn’t exactly anything out of the norm for fandoms in general to do, so it weirds me out that people rag on this one for just kinda talking amongst themselves about innocuous things.

“omg this fandom is arguing over QUILL length ughhh can they never be pleased [30 yt videos about this drop]” ngl, this just feels like par for the course junk fandoms do. It really feels no different from DBZ where people go ham about the art style changes and which one is better. Or stupid shit in IZ where they fight about comics vs movie vs show. Like??? The only major difference here is that StH has more people in it (by the millions).

So literally nothing these folk do or say strikes me as anything more serious than what other fandoms already do??? Its just more outsiders see it then churn out content and perpetuate something worse from what’s honestly….pretty tame stuff. Maybe it’s just twitter’s setup given that’s all folk talk about.

[procrastinationau]

IMPORTANT!

I realize that before I start publishing the rest of the current fic, I should put a note out to people who follow this blog.

This fic is pretty pivotal in the AU. There's a lot of plot and character development that happens in it, and most of that is in this back half of the fic that I just finished writing and haven't published yet. Some of it has been planned for a REALLY long time. So I have...a bit of a backlog of drafted posts (art, meta, memes) that I've had on standby for a while. And I wanna post them.

The plan is this. Once the fic has been fully posted, I'm going to wait 24 hours and then I will begin posting my drafted posts via the queue. ALL OF THESE POSTS WILL BE TAGGED WITH #AU SPOILERS. If you want to avoid spoilers, blacklist that tag.

I know I don't have a ton of active readers and I feel like people tend to read the chapters pretty quickly after they go up, so I'm hoping that the 24 hour grace period will give everyone enough time to catch up. This is 24 hours after the fic is completed.

Thanks for reading! I'm so excited to share some of the stupid shitposts I've been sitting on for almost a year lol.