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#I hate them so much!!!! (LIE LIE LIE LIE LIE i love them actually with all my being)
rosyandraw · 2 days
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idk if this is redundant on your end but thoughts on Damen needing to talk during sex? in the books it isn’t even dirty talk it’s just endless want for Laurent and how long he’s been waiting for him and how different Laurent feels. Also in canon & in ur own writing
Definitely not redundant! You have just knocked on the Damen Character Study door in my head lmao but it's late and idk how much sense this will make so i'm sorry in advance.
Mini meta on Why Damen Likes to Talk During Sex in Canon
First and foremost words are hugely important to Damen, not just during sex but in general. It is part of the reason that Vere trips him up so badly, why he just doesn’t get it. Because Vere is a veil of word play and innuendo, it’s double speak and flowery bullshit and lies.
That’s not Damen. His word is his bond, it’s tied to his honour and they mean a great deal to him. He never says anything he doesn’t mean. Ever. If it’s coming out of his mouth he is saying that shit with his whole damn chest and doesn't give a fuck.
The few times he is forced to lie or to say something he doesn’t mean he says it as a strategy play but it barely makes it out of his mouth and he hates it.
For a long time by the time they get to Ravenel Damen has been playing a part. Living a half truth and not saying everything he means. Or wants to say.
Likewise, in Akielos, Damen keeps himself held back. We know this because in 3 books, despite being the darling crown prince and heroic military leader, he mentions 1 person by name that he is actually and genuinely close to. One. He’s never been in love with anyone before Laurent, he doesn’t get close, he doesn’t get particularly attached. If he did Jokaste would have been a Princess and not just his mistress.
It speaks of a whole heap of childhood trauma and issues, thanks in large part to his father and Kastor and this picture that is painted of strength in Akielos being The Most Important Thing. (And i have too many thoughts on said implied trauma to write it all out properly here because it's an essay unto itself.)
We also know that Damen does the talking thing with Jokaste too. So we know it's an indicator of intimacy in bed for him. He's certainly not doing it in Vask, for example. Because Damen values words so highly he does wear his heart on his sleeve, but he guards that heart close. Sharing his feelings becomes something then tied to both the value Damen places on words and the lack of emotional intimacy in his life. To Damen, opening up like that especially during sex, is an act of giving unto its self.
Damen is strong, yes. Crazy strong and the perfect warrior. But he also likes the wordy sad poems and has craved approval (and affection) from his father and Kastor seemingly most of his life. For example, Kastor stabbed him and made Damen believe with words that it was a good thing because it meant Kastor respected him enough to fight him like a man.
It’s the perfect anecdote to draw all of those ideas together. Damen being happy about being stabbed at 13 by his brother because Kastor said it was a good thing to be strong enough to fight properly and bear the consequences.
Words matter to Damen, he assumes they do to other people too. It's what nearly gets him killed.
It’s funny really, because Damen values words but he himself is a man of action and Laurent values action but is a man of words.
When it comes to sex we see them swap places from their usual dynamic and therein lies the intimacy.
Laurent acts and Damen talks. It’s a complete role reversal and it was always meant to be. Pacat has said, several times, that Laurent tops Damen with words all the time and it was a purposeful choice to have Laurent bottom because of this. So to follow that through to it's logical conclusion for the sex scenes to really hit we needed to see them swap places completely and Damen needed to talk.
Laurent is a mouthy little shit but when it comes to his important scenes (the building of their intimacy and their sex scenes) it's never his words that he's speaking loudest with. Like when he just hugged Damen after the meeting with Jokaste in KR or when he went to get ice for him in PG, it's an offering in place of words and Laurent does it frequently: letting his actions speak louder than any of his words because to Laurent words don't really matter, lies are too easy. He's been taken in by words before.
Damen gets to Laurent through his actions and it's Laurent's moments of honesty, of saying something unexpected, that make Damen really pay attention. This isn't to say that Laurent's actions don't get to him, they do of course, but only really when Damen comes to realise that's how Laurent is being honest. Likewise in reverse for Laurent.
It's the language the other understands that allows the distance to bridge, but the intimacy comes in the opposite every time.
So when they fall into bed Laurent instigates with action, all three times they are together. And Damen talks. Because it’s the thing that is important to them that they are willingly giving and sharing and that is what makes it intimate.  
Quite simply, Damen holds himself back emotionally so talking during sex like that is a way for Damen to let go and to let his partner know that's it not just sex. Laurent, in reverse, shows his want through the instigation and by the time it happens they both know what it means: Laurent never does that and Damen knows it. Laurent knows Damen says what he fucking means.
It's such an intimate sex scene because of that awareness.
In my writing I kind of try to take that and run with it. Damen says what he means and what he wants Laurent to hear, because words of affirmation are important to him personally so he makes sure to share that.
Plus, it’s just sexy, you know? Got to love a man who talks in bed, that sex rough voice when he’s so far gone you know what his saying is just the shit flying through his head?
Hot.
Loved this ask so much. I could literally write a thesis on Damen lmao
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stormblessed95 · 1 day
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Watching Are You Sure?! EP 7
A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally they happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show so far!!
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Not this show starting off with a mistaken identity trip!! Lol Jimin saying that he only went snowboarding once before and it was with JK. And JK was so confused. You could see him searching the files in his brain lmfao. Jimin's oh wait! I went with your friends 😂😂 okay, just hanging out with JKs friends on your own? It's giving couple. I can't lie. I'm sorry. What in the best friend?! 😂😂 I loved the facial expressions and the way Jimin buried his face into Jungkookie there too
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Jimin listening to hate you. And JKs why are you listening to that? Jimin: because I like it 😳 lmao I agree Jimin, it was abrupt 😂😂
Their appreciation for their crew is 😍😍
Jk dozing off to Jimin's softly singing. It's giving the same vibes as that one run episode that he dozed off to Jimin's ASMR. Idk what that's giving exactly.... But it's giving *something* and you know what it is
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"this is our last moment of relaxation. I love it" 😭
Not JK just chopping at his hair like that. Oh baby lol don't look at me like this is my fault!! It's okay, fucking up your hair and needing to make it much shorter than originally planned is a life right of passage lol
Not JKs haircut transporting Jimin back in time 10 years 😂😂😂
The staff giggling and immediately taking photos 😂 BTS are their babies lol
Jimin hurting himself and shouting oh shit 😂😂 the subtitles trying to sensor him without bleeping his actual words 😂🤣 subtitles should be accurate above all else people! Cmon! Lol
Jimin moaning and groaning while transferring tubs, sitting on the edge, etc and JK just looks like he is enjoying the show the whole time. There is so much ass on display in the shorts they are wearing in this whole scene. Where is the decorum?! Lol!
Turning off the cameras to shower together before the Jacuzzi. Very innocent, but sounds like it could be so not 🤣😂
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JKs faces when trying to handle to cold tub 😂😂
"feel how cold I am" better translated to "just hug me once" and the immediate hug and the hand placement to feel the cold? Yeah okay 🤣
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Anyone remember the emojis over the barest slips of tummy during anything? Now they are showing them wash themselves and rub their own muscles in a cold tub and show off flexing to the camera. What the fuck Hybe 🤣🤣🤣
Soundproof Sauna to their matching PJs and eating a whole feast 🥰
The way they giggle together is my favorite thing
JK watching Jimin making his this crab is so good video so endeared 🥰😂😍
Jimin insisted on JK trying the shrimp too because it was so amazing instead of eating the last of the shrimp even though he loved it so much. And JK sharing half his urchin with Jimin because it was so yummy. Cute. They are so precious to each other
Jimin wants seconds, JK says it's a bad idea. They order seconds 😂😂😂
I both love and hate watching them eat. Because I think watching people eat is gross and I stand by that. Lol but they love it so much and look so happy, I also just enjoy seeing them enjoy themselves. It's a complicated mix of emotions I experience 😂
The trend continues of brushing their teeth together. Jimin, the mischief maker, kicks JK during their teeth brushing?? Lol and takes a selfie of them too. Share it please?
"I'm going to pass out after this, especially if we get massages" JK " we are getting massages?!" No lmfao you silly goose, that was 100% Jimin hinting at wanting a massage 😂🤣😂🤣
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Not them being super sleepy, yet still annoying each other on purpose by flashing lights at each other 😂
Jimin asking JK if he is too hot, probably knowing already he gets too hot at night. But instead of changing the temperature when he did wake up too hot, knowing Jimin was comfy with how it was, JK just moved to the living room. And Jimin waking him up by so softly petting his head 🥺🥺🥺
Are they advertising sunscreen? Lol it worked. I wanted to go get some 😂😂
Jimin fighting for his LIFE in the shower. Wtf was happening?!! Lmao and JK finishing up his breakfast before going into the bathroom to shower while Jimin was still in the shower it sounded like. Lol ALRIGHT. Hope you both enjoyed said shower I guess 😅😂🤣
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Why are we play fighting while getting dressed boys?! Lmao
Jimin starting a pretend photoshoot with the ski jacket and gear. Absolutely, yes please
Jimin is such a good boyfriend bringing JKs jacket back out to him
Jimin just enjoying sitting in the car while JK goes in to order 😂😂 good for him! JK telling him he only ordered food for himself and none for Jimin, only to say "here is our food" when it arrived 😂 what a jokester lol
Jimin feeding Jungkook while he is driving 🥺
Jimin joking about an AYS OST. Please please please give it to us though for real
Singing random love songs for a game! Where JK interrupted Jimin singing the line "the person I love is gone" to sing "I love you" three times lol okay got it
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The way JK always stops to just stare at Jimin until he gets his reaction to whatever he is doing or wearing is always so cute. Especially because he always smiles so cutely after Jimin gives him his desired compliment 💜❤️
JK adjusting Jimin's googles for him 🥺
The way that JK checks in on Jimin first to make sure he is actually okay before teasing him about being scared lol it's sweet and cute
The hysterical cut of JK shredding down the slope to Jimin laying in the snow 😂😂😂😂 Jimin and his staff member literally falling over each other 🤣🤣🤣 I'm dying lmao!
Jimin ditching his helmet with how often he falls is stressing me out lmfao he looks gorgeous though!
Skiing would be fun too he says, turning to Jimin with a hopefully sparkle in his eyes that he knows Jimin can't say no to. Camera cuts to them on skis 😂 JK, I love and adore you. Never change
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Wrap up thoughts:
They showered/bathed together 3 times in one episode and thats insane. Lmao whatever guys 😂 this was just an excellent episode showcasing their closeness, their intimacy, their silliness, their individuality and their soft spoken nature with each other. It showed the way they consistently consider each other, what the other wants and needs. I don't think I have anything to expand on from what I've already said above. I really loved this episode. Fully plan on the last episode making me cry.
All purple links in my post go back to @dstdes with video clips of the moment being talked about. I did use a few twitter clips as well, sorry. Thanks for reading!
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pardonmydelays · 3 months
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i have a confession to make: i'm actually doing better than i ever was
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lavaflowe · 1 year
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A little comic from my very specific Jiankong AU: SEM arc edition
Shoutout to @relmint for helping me create about 50% of this AU
Inspo:
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all-pacas · 25 days
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also i’m slowly rereading for the eightieth time asoiaf and i can’t believe people out there still insist jaime isn’t constantly thinking about brienne and her strong thighs. like it’s funny but it’s also such smart writing i just want to go on about it. how he’s got zero self awareness but his chapters are just littered with like. subtext? idiocy? jaime sees something sexual and confuses himself when he thinks immediately of brienne. qyburn tells him brienne is in danger and the next paragraph goes “for some reason jaime was in a bad mood now” like his chapters are so fun
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tetraandtheapples · 28 days
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Erm!! I did more art!!!!!! My art style is so inconsistent I want to draw more realistically but I'm goofy goober at my core....... Gehahahaha
Also???? Pony Error under cut??????? (and a few error sketches!) Hidden slightly because I'm still a bit unsure about the design RAHH
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I think it'd be cool if he had strings all over his body like he was some mangled stupid hasbro official pony plushie...... but the strings were like insanely last minute LMAO so I want to redo it again with that in mind.... when the pony takes me over again.
Transcript for Pony Info (because my handwriting is a bit messy)
PONY INFO!
Strings run along entire body
Used to have a cutie mark, but the file is "lost"
Horn sparks & glitches dangerously when using magic
-> Not harmful to him, but strong emotions can cause it to flare up (basically when the horn starts fuzzing a lot you know he's close to a full-on reboot)
Whatever the hell this thing is core -> (pic of very stupid looking Hasbro official Princess Twilight Sparkle plushie with brushable hair!!!! Batteries not included)
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↓ WARNING!!! STUPID IDIOT BELOW!!!!!!! 🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️☢️☢️☢️☢️☢️☢️☢️☢️☢️☣️☣️☣️☣️☣️☣️☣️🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 ↓
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#utmv#swapdream#swad sans#swapdream dream#swan sans#swapdream nightmare#error sans#gamers err.... they're really stupid!!!#I hate them so much!!!! (LIE LIE LIE LIE LIE i love them actually with all my being)#I have no idea what I'm doing I'm not used to tumblr editor#I want to make my page look cooler..... maybe 2010s theme..... can i do that perhaps?#Stupid idiots!!!! Sorry my demons#I should probably make an intro post too but idk what to say.... other than “helo i like erm. Undertale! I like..... pretty much only UTMV!#This is mostly a lie I like other things but I'm only going to be posting UTMV mainly#Sigh getting off track anyways!!!!! Idiots!!! I hate them!#Swad he's so prim and proper and completely obnoxious#I feel like with him being completely manic 24/7 he wouldn't take care of himself very well#Like if it weren't for the self healing thing he would look absolutely terrible. Rotting teeth cracked bones etc etc and he would not care#He would still prance around in fields of daisies tho he is literally too hyped up#I feel like he would chase Swan like until his body physically could take no more#One sec he's approaching at full speed and the next he shuts down completely & collapses just because his body literally ran out of juice#Error is striving for that hobocore aesthetic he will not change his clothes ever he constantly repairs the same ones#I also feel like Error would be like. insanely stinky (PEE-YEW!)#Water doesn't interact well with his body so he avoids it best he can#he can only take sponge baths for hygiene and even that is like insanely prickly for him.... Feels like pins and needles sizzling on his bo#Sighs that's it for me gamers!!!!!! Ramble in the tags over#Swad OUTTT!!!! *bursts through ceiling leaving swad shaped hole in your roof*
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lovesickeros · 1 year
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☆ lost in orbit
{☆} characters tsaritsa {☆} notes cult au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings violence [ implied ], unhealthy relationship {☆} word count 0.6k
She had resigned herself to apathy – to burying her love beneath the cold, hard soil and letting it rot amongst the graves of a long dead civilization, burned to ash in only a day. Yet how quickly it all fell apart in her hands, slipping through her fingers like sand, no matter how desperately she tried to cling to it.
Was she not diligent enough? Was she so weak that she faltered at the first person who showed her genuine trust and affection? Had all her work been for naught?
A part of her revolts – the same woman who watched the sky burn and the ground beneath her feet crumble into ash. It would be so easy to wrap her hands around your delicate throat, to squeeze until you finally saw her as the monster she knew she has always been.
Yet she doesn't think she could. The look of betrayal, of fear..oh, it would ruin her, she knows.
Perhaps that makes her weak. Perhaps you have made her weak.
Perhaps she does not mind as much as she should.
You trust her, after all – enough to sleep in her bed like she couldn't just kill you before you ever knew what was happening to you. Your body was so..fragile, in this mortal shell you descended in. How easy it would be to snuff out your life, here and now.
Yet she doesn't.
Instead, she looks at you like an old lover – with all the love of a woman who had died in the ashes of a dying civilization, of a woman who thought she could love no longer. Emotions she fought so hard to suppress well up in her chest and fill the empty space where she knows her heart should beat. Try as she might – and oh, how she tries – she can never quite stem the affection that consumes her every waking moment when she sees you.
It is like an addiction that she cannot rid herself of, no matter how she tries. She always finds herself back at square one – back to you.
Her hand lingers against your cheek, undue affection filling the empty spaces in her chest until she feels like cannot breathe. She traces her hand along your jaw, her vision narrowed on the softness of your lips.
Yet that same thought rises unbidden to the forefront of her thoughts. Love was a dangerous thing – you both knew that. To let it fester and rot her from within..she would be throwing her plans out the window, and for what?
Because she was too weak? Because the affection and trust in your eyes whenever your looked at her made her feel whole, like she was more then just an Archon playing God with the fate of the world?
You do not even stir as her thoughts toil like a brewing storm. She swallows the lump in her throat, removing her hand like she'd just touched a piece of hot metal. A part of her still screams that it's for the best, that you've corrupted her enough, torn apart her plans in the span of a week, a mere blink in time..
But it goes silent as she leans in, pressing her lips to your cheek. She will not let the thought fester, tonight – she will let herself be weak, if only for another day. If only to covet the affection that she finds herself drowning in for just another day.
And when you stir, she pretends that she had never thought of it at all, that she has only ever known love with you. Even if her heart that does not beat leaves a stabbing pain in her chest in the agony of knowing that even this is futile..
She lets you wake, let's the recognition and the affection fill your vision until she is all you see – two stars locked in orbit, unable to break away.
And when the day comes that you collide, she will be holding the blade that drives into your chest, and she will know nothing but love when she does.
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#tsaritsa#fellas is it gay to think abt murdering ur lover bc u love them so much#everyone hcing that her lover died in khaenri'ah but what if she killed them..#tsaritsa killing her lover so they dont have to walk down the same path and suffer the consequences when celestia retaliates>>>#tsaritsa killing her lover bc to her them dying is better then living and she refuses to let them be corrupted by going down the same path#i just think shes a little silly!!! a little goofy!!!! i forgive her#theres just smth abt tragic lesbians and also tragic lesbians whose tragedy is one of their own making#yknow :)#but at the SAME TIME. her lover dying and wanting her to move on and LIVE but shes so spiteful shes willing to destroy herself to#destroy celestia. she doesnt care abt what happens to her bc if her lover isnt there with her then what does it matter? she has nothing lef#to lose.#characters who become their lover would hate bc living in a world without them is agony>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>#also i only tagged unhealthy relationship bc the tsaritsa is. unhinged but shes actually v normal in the relationship#she loves u!!!! and shes a good lover!!! she just thinks abt killing u sometimes bc she loves too much and its easier to kill u now vs lose#you later on where it will hurt WORSE#also bc smth smth she thinks itll make it hurt less if she kills you vs someone else bc she would actually LOSE IT if someone hurt u#spoilers it does not and she spirals and is haunted by what shes done and constantly tries to lie to herself to justify it. it does not wor#did i scare off the normal ppl w this one.......maybe!!!!!#i meant morally grey at best when i said morally grey at best!!#crawls back into my ditch okay im shutting up now
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ccbatman · 3 months
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actually so evil how much of hal's internal world gets obliterated with the rewriting of his relationships with jessica and martin.
#hal jordan#empyrean posting#ok going in the tags because im not actually v confident in my understanding of his character. i read all of his 80s/90s stuff but forgot#90% of it but ANYWAY.#so much of him just does not make sense with how geoff johns characterises him and his relationships with his parents particularly the#parallax stuff simply because of how much his relationship with the guardians and their apathy/'betrayal' is influenced by hal's original#relationship with his dad. like at its heart it's pretty much the same dynamic in how hal blindly trusts and sort of idolises the guardians#despite their repeated infractions in hope of... something in return just as he had with his father and the abuse he suffered at martin's#hands. that's what makes his anger at the guardians make sense when it does show itself because the relationship parallel didn't stop there.#as with martin hal gets nothing for his devotion. he gets nothing for doing everything that's asked of him and more and it ends the same way#too: with a man in the sky burning like a newborn star. and you lose so much of that nuance and intrigue behind that if you just make#jessica the 'bad one' because!!! you cheapen it!!!!#the whole idea of hal is that he has his father's face but his mother's scars#(to me). in the sense that they both reacted to martin the same way with that cognisance of who he was as a man yet inability to pull away#because... love. both the love they had for him and the conviction that he did or could love them too. and jessica arguably did eventually#but also she didnt did she? because she held onto that notion of love till the very end. the few scraps she had she ballooned outwards until#they became the whole. but hal didnt have even that and he spent his whole life chasing it & running away from wanting it at the same time#like i think there's something so interesting to the fact that he had to be convinced that flying was what he wanted to do. how much of that#was touched by his father? the fear that he was already too much like him than he could bear to be? he already had his face now he had his#dreams and longing for the sky. how much more could he have before he began repeating the cycle?#and at the end he even had his father's death. burning in the clouds. like there's so much there and that's not even touching on how it#impacts his relationships with other heroes. not just in the sense of why did kyle clark and diana get to keep their close yet complex#relationships with their moms when hal had to lose his (although yeah why did they) but also just how he lets himself come across to them.#because it's on purpose right? that he lets them think his reflection of his father is born out of unadulterated love for a man worthy of it#? he has his father's job he wears his father's jacket he smiles his father's smile. what else are they supposed to think.#and isnt that interesting!!! that this man who is so committed to being good & just can lie so casually to people he thinks of as friends!!!#can you see how that might be his mother through and through!!! in how she might have glossed over the abuse to other people and herself!!!#can you see how in spite of it all he might want to be perceived as his father that paragon of masculinity and resent that he is not!!!#do you understand how everything he loves has been poisoned!!! im thinking of that scene where he tells bruce about watching martin die &#wouldnt it have been so much more interesting through this lens. how he is both revealing & obfuscating at once. i hate the change sm
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brionysea · 6 months
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this man is pissing me off
#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#first it was with his annoying ass thoughts about the superiority of the capital and the dehumanisation of the districts#but now he's having like. NORMAL thoughts. that would be EXPECTED when living in a dystopia#he's seen two classmates die and realised it could've been him and that sejanus saying the capitol not protecting its citizens had merit#and he started acting like a decent human being about lucy gray's situation#forgetting about his own bullshit in the face of her suffering because it's clear that hers is more immediately concerning#the parallels between katniss and coryo drive me INSANE#they've both impoverished young adults who've been in survival mode trying to keep their families from starving to death#forced to actually acknowledge the real world and decide on their own sense of morality#with good influences trying to push them towards the right side#eg. katniss having gale and peeta's voices in her head when she makes a stand for rue#but i KNOW snow doesn't listen to lucy gray and sejanus#i KNOW he doesn't#i've seen the ending! so the possibility of him getting over himself and becoming better is pissing me off because i know he doesn't!!!!#it would be so much easier if he was pure evil. it would be so much less infuriating and so much less horrifying but he's not#he had the potential for goodness and instead he murdered countless people#including thousands of children and any political opponents who got in his way#AND ALSO LUCY GRAY AND SEJANUS#(lucy gray's fate is a mystery but he still chose to kill her and that at least changed HIM)#i hate this. these books are so good i HATE IT#but also some of these lines are so ironic#his tendency towards obsession is likely to kill him one day if he doesn't learn to outsmart it#almost like an obsession with the mockingjay#and calling dr. gaul crazy for her extreme measures to ensure he doesn't lie to her#when he ends up doing the exact same thing to katniss#maybe minus the overt show of violence but like. he doesn't have to. he's in her house threatening her loved ones#it's so fascinating#i want to eat it#but i won't cause i haven't finished reading yet
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rxttenfish · 1 month
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starts hyperventilating as i repeat over and over that i have to make miranda and aaravi my ocs already i have to i have to i have to
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standing-flowers · 8 months
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guess who finally finished the second series of Hannibal x3
I HATE THOSE GAYS I HATE THEM I HATE THEM HOW DARE THEY I SOBBED I BAWLED CURSE THEM I HATE THEM
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mossflower · 1 year
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finished homestuck!! and adding it to my ever growing list of ‘media near-universally labelled as cringe that actually kinda slaps’
#like i won’t lie parts of it? terrible. i can’t even begin to piece together half of the lord english plot#but i think a lot more of it was actually really really good. especially act 4 and act 5 they were my favourite hands down#act 6 not so much. like separately? i loved the alpha kids and the dancestors and the concept of the cherubs was really interesting#but somewhere the execution fell short. it’s gonna annoy me cause i can’t figure out why#i think it might be the retcon. which i didn’t hate as an idea!! but it occurred closer to the end than i thought it would#i feel like if they’d explored the impact of the retcon more it might have flowed better?? idk#idk. act six as a whole i’m split on. i either loved what it did or was massively confused and exasperated by what it did#it’s like half of the comic and i got through it in about a week when it took me like a month to do acts 1-5#and it doesn’t feel like that much happened it’s weird#but yknow. it is the act that sold me on vriska!! like i liked her before but i really liked her ghosting it up in this act#the bit where ghost vriska and ghost terezi found each other nearly had me in tears#vrisrezi as a whole. what a concept. easily one of the best dynamics in the entire thing#i really hope terezi finds vriska post-canon. however i’m not sure if i want to read the epilogues and homestuck 2 or not yet#ooh ooh also!! john fulfilling his quest slapped!! that’s probably one of my favourite bits in homestuck ngl#and omg. did not see davekat coming i won’t lie but i was v happy about it#k ill stop now bc i will end up listing half the characters and my favourite bits about them. and as fun as that would be#i really need to sleep haha#homestuck
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niklenakle · 8 months
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I finished dungeon meshi i knew falin would be my favorite she remained my favorite i love her so much i wanna draw her so bad but i also hate drawing so like if u all could just imagine i did, thatd b rlly cool
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royalreef · 2 months
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(( As a kinda silly OOC thing: I like conceiving of Miranda (and her connections through the Merkingdom) as being an anti-OP muse.
As in, I like the thought of, the more OP someone or something else is, the worse of a time they have being able to do anything to Miranda. She is, very intentionally and within the logic of her own universe, designed to be able to handle those with extreme power and authority and to be able to undermine everything they can throw at her and counteract anything that they try to do.
She's already a royal, next in line to her throne! She has to be able to fully handle other people in similar positions without risking any damage to her own, and this is something that she's dealt with her entire life. She very much knows all the risks associated as a part of her job, her title, her entire reason for being born, and she's well-trained in the formal and informal methods of striking down anyone else who might even come close to a position to her own.
Which, of course, means that muses that very much aren't OP, that are just normal people or much closer to it, are much, much more capable of threatening Miranda and the Merkingdom both as a point of intention. This is something that I very much want and very much want to encourage. Especially because the reason this is such a problem is the way that the Merkingdom and, thus, Miranda, entirely overlook and ignore such threats and treat them like non-issues. The fact that most Merkingdom royals, upon actually encountering a landfolk, have a range of responses from discomfort to dismissal to ignorance, is one that is very purposeful here. The ones that they're most likely to pay attention to are the ones in the most danger, and the ones that they aren't likely to care very much about beyond petty malice and as another means to inflate their own egos. And, as it is, the ones they're most likely to pay attention to are those that have decided to pose a risk.
And it's a thing that I've been dealing with from the beginning too. From the start of this blog I was very bothered by the idea that some OP character would decide to singlehandedly "fix" or destroy the Merkingdom from a position of equal or greater authority. Which is not to say that I didn't want it to be changed or that there weren't ways to dismantle it. But rather, I wanted it to be more organic, and I wanted to deal with the actual question of how that even happens, and I wanted to ask the question of what could measurably improve this situation and Miranda's life both.
Which meant that, yeah, the more OP a muse is the more intentionally destined for failure they are, and the closer they approach "some guy", the more they'll be able to achieve. Which is not to say it won't be difficult or hard to do, or that there's not the possibility for failure (again, even at her most basic, Miranda is a macropredator that can easily maim someone, but more typical "normal" muses are more likely to possess caution and try to read her body language before pressing her), but the fact remains, very intentionally, that they are the only ones who will be able to do it.
#Most secret royal advisor || OOC#(( miranda is like the non-newtonian fluid of muses#(( the harder you try to hit her the less youll be able to do and the harder you get hit in turn#(( again: the correct way to handle miranda is to fuss over her like a kitty cat#(( she likes it when people are just silly and affectionate with her#(( and you can go VERY far if you stay within that non-threat range#(( its also why miri is a chronic oversharer with her friends#(( and constantly will say the most concerning things to them that she might not even be mentally registering herself#(( and cant lie very good to them and feels an urge to give away her secrets#(( but if you actually try to pull those secrets out on your own then Good Fucking Luck#(( its also why i often take mental account of#(( if miranda is ACTUALLY registering someone as a threat or if she thinks theyre annoying or frustrating or feels hurt#(( if shes actually being threatening intentionally in any given scene or if shes just. playing.#(( because shes dramatic and she likes to do the cat thing#(( where she acts all menacing and scary because she wants to chase and be chased#(( its why i specify if shes actually hitting someone with her claws or not or how hard she bites when she does#(( if blood isnt drawn then shes not trying to hurt you#(( because all of this matters!!! miranda has her secret affinity scores that no one else is privy to!! you just have to guess!#(( (i will also say the vast majority of them are neutral or that miranda finds them boring.)#(( (most likely she just doesnt care rather than hates someone)#(( this also applies to positive relationships tbh........#(( see: how easily miranda will get into relationships but just thinks of the other person as a fun toy to use and dispose of#(( they have Not actually gotten as close to her as they might feel in the moment#(( shes just funky!!!! i love having a muse who is so much not what she seems!!!!!
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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hmm i like actually wanna kms
#big oof 🥴#if i try to talk im dramatic and emotional and only met with judgement ....#if i try to push it all down and pretend everythings fine i feel like im slowly dying#if i try to ask for help ppl only slap my hand away and dismiss me#if i complain im a negative pos who everyone hates#if i stfu and dont talk i feel miserable and like i have this big lump in my throat and i cant breathe#im never right or ok or valid or anything. im always wrong.....#im sad and lonely bc all i want is for someone to really truly love me and hold me#but truth is nobody cares that much if i would actually kms#but then im pathetic and whiny for crying in pain since i feel so alone and worthless#like honestlyyyy u can never win in life and esp if you're mentally ill and disordered and traumatized#and also just extremely sensitive even if u could choose u would choose to feel nothing#but ppl always complain no matter what i do :// im always doing smth wrong smth bad#like i didnt ask for everything that happened to me to happend and i didnt ask for it to shape me#and i dont want this or be like this bc my life is nothing but a miserable worthless waste of space#but im trying but im all alone in a dark hole like 12ft underground#and people who might see me wont do anything to help or just walk on their merry way#they will take a shovel and shovel even more dirt on top of me and make it even harder for me to crawl out of this hole#and like idek what im talking abt but this world is insane and people are fucking insane#and all everyone has is judgement and cruelness and calousness and like#ppl are just mean and they get personally attacked and angry if you dont live according to their standards and views and idk#ppl are insane and i feel so alone and im lying here knowing that my life is absolutely nothing#and im tired and i just wanna not exist. but really all i want is for someone to look me in the eyes and tell me i matter bc ive never#wanted to be saved. i've only ever wanted to be seen and known and like idfk.... i just dont#feel good but as always... i have to lie here alone and try not to kms bc i dont have anyone to ask to just talk to me for a little moment#like i cant even imagine... asking someone like hey i wanna kms pls talk to me for a moment#and have them reply immediately and idk i wouldnt even need long just like 10 minutes.#sigh idek what im rambling on abt im just so sick and tired and exhausted and i dont wanna die not really#but im so exhausted bc i have to carry this pain every day and people are so fucking awful but i dont wanna be alone and i just dont know
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tamagotchikgs · 5 months
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last post ended up deleting my tags so im continuing them here
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#but.#even after all the time i had aparti still went back at 16#i traveled across the country just to see her again#and it fucking sucked#she ripped that wound right back open#which . felt so weird because she WANTED me to come#she made all the plans#honestly the train trip there was nice#i got to experience a lot of cool things#but the second i got there. it was . one of the worst times of my life#just nonstop#and now ive finally been away for awhile again#but i still miss her#& i dont know why#but it also doesnt help the only gf i have ever had did the same type of thing LMAO//.... i .. i just cannot win#maybe it's just my roll#say all these nice things n then immediately flip#she would make me hang out w her friends n talk me up n then. cheat on me with them with me there#& then get upset when i cried or tried to break up w her LMAO...#like. she wasnt poly or anything she was actually against it#but the worst part is how openly & loudly she'd love me right before it. so now i never know who is telling the truth. i never feel safe#but anyway. again. i stayed#over n over again id try to break up w her but then i loved her & so when she got upset n threaten to kms id flip n stay#n she'd do it again#until eventually she broke up w me n left me so fuckd up im not gonna lie JHVAJH#she still tried to stay friends after that n i tried#but then i started sobbing mid card game & it was very embarrassing top 10 worst things i have done#but i just. all i want is to be a good person. i want to be someone good & loving but i feel like im such a jealous monster#even if i dont let myself show it n try to ignore it bc i dont want to hurt anyone or be this awful it;s still here. just. permeating.#what if i feel too much what if ill never know when someone is genuine what if im just an evil obsessive freak n everyone i love hates me
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