#I had to completely re upload the post since stuff got cut off after I rebranded to the fun house.

[spoocys-glade-of-dreams]

Rayman Fan Characters: Kahli The God-blessed

this character’s story includes major spoilers to the events of games especially around hoodlum havoc.

this is a VERY long post:

Kahli classified as a plot important fan character within Rayman Retold but she was scheduled to come later down the timeline, specifically during and after the events of Rayman 3 Hoodlum Havoc. she appears quite often after the in game events, and does have significance within certain story plots.

Kahli was the lady that would act as advisor for the knaaren royalty. she was especially close with Gumsi’s mother, who was the previous ruler of the Knaaren, their queen. Kahli is also one of the most important knaaren ladies in the social status. She is the lady that was the mid-wife for any knaaren females during childbirth. 

Knaaren women have extreme difficulty with childbirth. The norm in most cases is that the mothers will die. Knaaren are not born with their fabled invincibility and grow into it, so children are vulnerable.

Khali is a soothsayer. Knaaren soothsayers tend to act as voices for the Leptys and a small number could foretell events in the future. Kahli could communicate with any of the Rayman universe gods telepathically. Not just the Leptys! She could communicate with gods like Polokus, and Jano the first nightmare would constantly reach out to try to corrupt this woman into his puppet. 

Her soothsaying allows her to peer into events that have taken place in the past, or are planned to take place in the future. She has a little spot within the ruins that she uses for these event scryings. Normally she does not tend to get involved on the events that are planned to happen, however it doesn’t mean she never does. she DOES get involved and tries to change, but it really depends on the circumstances. She can’t change the past, but she can try to change the future ones. Most times she allows the event to happen and is forced to suffer in silence over it. She gets a lot of fingers pointed at her going “WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP THIS!?” This treatment has lead to her as coming off as a grouch or uninterested in interacting socially. 

When Gumsi’s mother passed away due to the complications their kind have with childbirth, his father never came forward to claim him. Kahli searched for him, but he was never found. His fate is currently unknown. A massive line started so others could try to adopt Gumsi due to his status as the next in line for the throne. When Kahli made it known that she had intentions of adopting the child herself, she became unchallenged and Gumsi’s care was given to her uncontested. Kahli adopted Gumsi as her grandson.

Gumsi calls her Mee-Maw. He gushes over her being the coolest grandma in the universe. Always goes on and on about her powers and abilities. Gumsi admired her more than he did with Reflux, who was another of his idols.

Gumsi knows the details of what happened during his birth. He is incredibly protective of his Mee-maw and will threaten to fight you if you claim you are seeking her guidance out.

She might not be able to die from physical means or age, but she’s not un-killable. Her weakness is consumption of poisonous materials. She has been victim to assassination attempts via poisoning before and has survived. Gumsi was forced to witness the poisoning assassination attempts.

Gumsi does NOT react well when he knows his Mee-maw is in distress. Gumsi is a child; A very emotionally fueled child. These attempts have left Gumsi with trauma. His greatest fear is something happening to Kahli that leads to her death, and him being alone. It scares him to death. When Kahli was poisoned and they were trying to cure her, he would go to her side, crying, screaming, begging her to not leave him. She has survived every attempt.

Kahli later made the decision to gift Gumsi the scepter of Leptys. It originally belonged to her. Kahli was going to raise Gumsi with a close connection with the gods, especially Leptys. It was her way of passing down her legacy to him. This also helps Gumsi with combating his fears of one day being alone.

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Kahli and Polokus are considered the bro-sis of the god/mortal regard. One of their gags are when Murfy’s going off at a person and is making jabs about appearances. She just looks all annoyed, but gets an "Aha!" moment like “Wait! I have just received a message from Polokus to pass along to you, Murfy” Murfy grins going “What’s that, Grandma?” and Kahli proceeds to smack Murfy hard enough tto knock him out of the air. When Murfy goes complaining to Polokus, the bubble dreamer just looks annoyed, bubbling away on his pipe, and responds “In this household, we give thanks to big noses!” 

Kahli’s humor can sometimes come off on the more dark or crass side, sometimes at her own expense. One of her go to personal jokes is when she sees something she just wants to forget is she will just make a comment “You know. some days i wish i had dementia. I want to forget I ever saw this” 

She’s been witness to so many mothers dying, and the fate of babies that are seconds born becoming questioned. This lead to her completely swearing off the possibility of one day producing young. Her position was too important for that. Now she can no longer produce young. She has become infertile due to her age.

Kahli is considered ageless. No one knows if this is true, but she has lived to be at least one thousand years old. She is elderly, but still in shape. 

Khali has incredible magic abilities. These abilities surpassed Reflux in power. She could have easily taken out Reflux for the title of champion, she simply chose not to. She already had enough on her plate. She NEVER liked reflux. At all. She’s never been fond of pit fighting in general but attends matches because Gumsi oversees them and is fond of watching them. She also knew Gumsi idolized Reflux.

Kahli ventures out of the ruins frequently due to her often being called to attend serious matters over in the fairy council. It's why Kahli tends to use her hooded robe as her main attire. She also brings jars of moisturizer with her when she leaves the ruins to tend to her skin in the event it starts to dry out and crack.

Kahli has a voice head canon too. Females don't have that gravelly accent that the knaaren tend to have, but their voices are still a bit on the deep side.

the voice head canon for Kahli here is a woman named Renee Victor.

Renee victor has been known for voices such as Abuelita in the movie Coco. but the reason i did her was for her role within The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim. She was the woman that did the Argonian females such as Keerava, Deeja, And the marriable Female Argonian, Shahvee When you hear Kahli speak, she tends to sound like this:

Bonus to the re-uploaded version of this post: A commission I ordered from user @nausinoisette a long time ago that features Kahli for reference.

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Here’s where things dig into her part within Rayman Retold:

Andre and Reflux were able to steal the scepter from Gumsi during Rayman 3 Hoodlum Havoc. How did that happen without Mee-maw knowing? Kahli tells people this often: She does not instantly know about the future events. She has to peer into these events herself. She must have been curious and go to the process of peering in. SHE DID NOT KNOW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN BECAUSE SHE NEVER PEERED INTO THIS SPECIFIC EVENT.

Reflux and Andre attempted to take the scepter from Gumsi by force.

Knaaren are dangerous if you make them mad. They go into full rage and blood lust that they can level entire buildings, and the most dangerous is a knaaren parent that knows their child is threatened.

Kahli could have EASILY murdered Reflux and Andre. They knew she could. They planned for that. All they had to do was have Reflux hold up Gumsi by the collar of his robe. The child was failing at trying to strike at them. Andre offered Kahli a deal. If Kahli let them take the scepter and go with their plan, they would not kill Gumsi.

Gumsi still had not grown into his invincible status, so they could easily carry that threat out. Kahli could only growl and she handed over the scepter in exchange for her grandson’s life. She lives in regret to this day that she allowed what happened to the Leptys to occur, but Gumsi is the most important person in her life. Even more important than her faith to the Leptys.

Reflux is of the deceased status after he crystalized and broke in the final fight within Hoodlum Havoc. Kahli cursed him to be forever known as Reflux the Blasphemer, and the knaaren call him that to this day. The scepter was recovered by Kahli after Reflux’s defeat and is back in Gumsi’s possession.

Rayman officially meets her after the events of Hoodlum Havoc. Rayman would often go to visit Gumsi and just pal around the kid. Gumsi introduces his Mee-maw to Rayman all starry-eyed like “ISN'T MY MEE-MAW COOL”

Rayman has like… 3 different people he considers moms at this point in his life. Kahli became the woman that he would call “Grandma” affectionately. Kahli loves this and just starts chuckling going “I love this kid.”

Rayman ends up rubbing off on this woman in a positive fashion. her normally grumpy and lack of social interaction improve during their interactions and she becomes a woman of jokes and all smiles.

[mikalara-dracula]

❣️ The type of girl the Sakamakis want to spend the rest of their lives with—

Warning: 18+ content below; don't read if you're a minor and aren't comfortable with this topic and slight NSFW. This is a fictional work and should not be taken seriously.

Caution: Unfortunately, Tumblr has a history of admins quarreling over completing carbon copy asks due to users sending the same request(s) to multiple admins, thus, resulting in unintentional plagiarism. With this, please DO NOT send the same request to multiple blogs as it can cause unintended plagiarism discord to other blogs across Tumblr. The word “plagiarism” stems from the early 17th-century Latin word, “plagiarius,” meaning “kidnapper.” So please, do not send in the same request to multiple blogs and make admins appear to be “kidnapping” other people’s work when it isn’t their intention. If this is to occur with any of my posts, please contact me so we can work something out.

This request is a re-upload bc tumblr deleted my post... wtf.

Tagging: @liannelara-dracula

- Shu -

❣️ When Shu was a kid, Beatrix always told him that he’d have to marry a girl his father grants him.

❣️ She probably implemented the toxic belief into him that he’d have to marry a docile girl who always listens to him.

❣️ Since Beatrix always kept reminding him that he would be married one day, he sometimes wondered what that would be like as a child since he was curious.

❣️ But as we know, after a bunch of childhood trauma, he got to the point of not caring about anything, so marriage was the last thing on his mind.

❣️ He never even focused on an ideal type, and didn’t ever think about how he could come across someone he’d want as a lover.

❣️ So, he’d probably meet his partner in a very unexpected way and not in a typical setting.

❣️ Shu’s seen it all throughout the centuries and knows when a girl is interested in him—cliché stuff is just a turn off, and so are suitresses and girls who have obvious interest in him.

❣️ Karl has probably tried to hook him up with different suitresses throughout the centuries, but he’s probably put off marriage so many times that it seems impossible to get him hitched.

❣️ He’s just not interested in matchmaking and makes a game out of it every damn time. He once made everyone think he was actually going to pick one of the suitresses Karl presented, but in the end, he called it off and said he wasn’t satisfied nor ready to make his choice.

❣️ Beatrix grew angry every time he’d reject the girls offered to him, but Karl always reassured her that it would happen, it would just take some time. I see that Karl’s just more patient when it comes to this—afterall, he probably took his time when it came to picking three wives, but that’s none of my business lmao.

❣️ Despite suitresses, there have been other women that Shu's 'dated' or 'courted' (for the older days sake), but it was never enough to keep him interested, or it was just a fling.

❣️ Anyways, going back to the topic, Shu is mainly interested in a girl that catches him off guard, especially when he first meets her.

❣️ If he meets a girl that isn’t interested in him at all, and even flat-up dislikes him, he’s honestly into that.

❣️ And as an added bonus, if she’s mean to him, it’s a turn-on. He’d honestly find it to amusing if he kept meeting her coincidentally at school. He’d treat it like a game, and would love to annoy her to see what smart remarks she’d give—he just loves the tension.

❣️ So, girls with a smart mouth are his thing—he just finds it amusing on a girl, especially since he and his brothers are from times where girls had to hold their tongues. So a sweet, docile girl, just ain’t gonna cut it.

❣️ A girl who surprises him by wearing lingerie to bed from time to time, hence my post about it here.

❣️ Wants a girl who will stroke or ruffle his hair to lull him to sleep. He really enjoys this. And if he’s resting his head in his s/o’s lap while being stroked in such a manner, it’s just heaven to him.

❣️ If a girl babies him, he’s all for it since he’s just a man-child.

❣️ Cooking his favorite food, making him snacks, he really appreciates it even though he’d never admit, at least not easily.

❣️ And if a girl feeds it to him, it only turns him on, plus it gives him the perfect excuse to bite her fingers and have a small taste of her blood.

❣️ A girl that will lay down next to him when he’s sleeping or resting, or allow him to rest his head on her shoulder when sitting next to him.

❣️ Enjoys forehead kisses or even if a girl places a kiss in his hair.

❣️ Also loves kisses on cheeks. If by any chance she kisses his cheek unexpectedly, he’ll never let her live it down and will tease her endlessly about provoking him.

❣️ A girl who defies or blushes at his teasing, he just loves it and only makes him continue.

❣️ Girls that don’t mind keeping him warm by skin-to-skin contact.

❣️ One who doesn’t mind making out with him on the couch, and if it’s in front of his brothers—Reiji especially—Shu’s all for it and thrives on it, and only intensifies the moment to make whatever audience he has extra annoyed.

❣️ Girls with thick thighs and ass—like this is a die hard for him since he likes to grab/clutch both parts.

❣️ Is into girls who will allow him to record their moans when he’s getting intimate with them and listen to those lewd tracks on an endless loop on his MP3 player.

❣️ A girl who has a dominate side. Shu doesn’t mind being submissive every once in a while, but he leans more towards the dominate side. So a girl who can do both, but lean more towards the submissive side is his type.

❣️ Although outside the bedroom, he likes a girl that takes the lead in the relationship. He finds it amusing in all honesty.

❣️ Despite his laziness, he can be quite passionate with a girl he loves, so he definitely wants an s/o that will return the passion just as equally.

❣️ A girl that likes laying in bed naked with him until morning, especially after sex, is his Achille’s heel.

❣️ And speaking of sex, he’s definitly into that after sex talk, and if you lay there naked in his arms, he’s all for it.

❣️ So with this, Shu secretly hopes that Reiji will walk in on him and his s/o in bed sometime, better yet in the actual act so he can rub it in. After all, as I’ve mentioned in other posts about Shu, he lives for the risk of getting caught.

❣️ Oh, and bare in mind that Shu goes to bed in his underwear sometimes (this is canon!).

❣️ (In one of the game routes, Yui went to go wake him up for school and he was in that state since he asked her to dress him.)

❣️ So because he sometimes goes to bed this way, he’s into a girl who won’t mind dressing him. He’ll tease her endlessly about it and won’t let her live it down.

❣️ Girls that like being kissed when no one’s looking—he finds this really amusing, especially if he can kiss his lover’s shoulders or neck. And if they react in a way that sounds or looks lewd to him, he’s even more amused. ;))))

❣️ As the heir, he has to attend lots of events his father forces onto him, and that includes balls.

❣️ So, he’s into a girl that’s into ditching the ball and going into a secluded, closed off room with him for a bit of intimacy before going back out to face all the guests again.

❣️ And if she forgets to fix her hair and comes out looking like a mess that’s been under the touch of Mr. Heir, he’s all for it and will send her seductive stares from afar even if he’s busy conversing with other noblemen.

❣️ Just being able to sit on a bench with his lover is enough for him when it comes to quality time—he does’t really care for fancy dates.

❣️ Getting him out in public is hard and quite rare since he doesn’t have the energy to do much, so if his s/o can drag his ass out of the house, he’s actually quite happy despite him complaining that it’s a pain to go out.

❣️ Secretly, he actually likes the fact that someone is putting so much effort into making him move and not calling him a good-for-nothing like Reiji does while doing so.

❣️ A girl who likes to go on walks. He’s not the biggest fan of walking but if it’s with his s/o, he doesn’t mind it.

❣️ And here, he’ll decide to get lively and decide to pick up his lover in his arms and spin her around out of nowhere. It’s really so he can hear her laugh since the cheerful sound is literal music to his ears.

❣️ It is canon that he likes going to concerts involving classical music or orchestras, so you can best bet he wants a girl that will appreciate going to places like this with him.

❣️ She doesn’t have to have a love for classical music like he does, but her having an appreciation for it is something he deeply appreciates.

❣️ That way if he decides to take his lover to a classical music concert, he doesn’t have be concerned about her being bored. Appreciation is something he rarely gets since Reiji’s constantly calling him useless, so a girl that appreciates these dates is something he cherishes.

❣️ During an orchestra, he’s into a girl that will kiss his cheek or pull him in for a kiss in the dark while the music plays.

❣️ And of course, you can bet he’ll tease her endlessly for provoking him and promises that she’ll be paying for it when they get home.

❣️ Girls that are willing to undress him before sex. He’ll undress the girl he loves too, but her taking his clothes off tells him she’s eager for him as well.

❣️ We all know how much Shu loves his baths, so a girl that likes to bathe rather than shower is a plus.

❣️ If a girl is into the idea of bathtub sex.

❣️ I’ve said this in another post, but I want to mention here as well. Shu’s especially into the idea of having his lover lay next to him bare while he’s still clothed in the tub since he enjoys the thrill of her being laid there naked for him. So if she’s willing to do this for him, he’s sold.

❣️ A girl that's into showing off her legs and wearing short or cropped things. And if she wears short shorts that show a bit of her ass or if they ride up and she has to adjust them, he’s all for it and will tease her relentlessly.

❣️ A girl that will give him the most amusing reactions when he’s acting like the perv we all know he is. For example, if he sees that his s/o is really into a movie they’re watching together, he’ll catch her off guard by lifting up her skirt, and her reaction is the key that makes him want to keep her on the edge.

❣️ Shu’s into giving his girl hickies, so if she tries to cover them up he’s beyond amused.

❣️ If his girl allows him to use her as a body pillow, and if she allows him to lay his head on her chest, it’s utter heaven to him.

❣️ A girl that doesn’t mind being teased under the table, and what I mean is him running his foot up and down his lover’s leg and/or attempting to get their skirt to go up so he can see her panties.

❣️ Likes it if his girl initiates kisses, it really riles him up.

❣️ Girls that wear dresses or skirts with high slits.

❣️ Or if she wears jeans that have rips where the thigh or ass area is.

❣️ Girls that tie their long shirts into knots about their waistlines, and if they pair this look up with short shorts, he's done.

❣️ I've said this once, but I'll say it again, Shu’s into a girl that has dishelved hair since it gives him the image of what she’ll look like if she wakes up with him.

- Reiji -

❣️ Reiji has always hoped to meet someone worthwhile, someone he could dedicate himself to without finding it to be a waste of time.

❣️ Has hoped to meet his love in a mysterious and seductive way.

❣️ He wants to meet a girl that just puzzles and entrances him all at once. He wants to be able to find all the pieces in order to get to know her, and he’ll drive himself mad doing this.

❣️ And also, on a more psychological level, he wants a girl that will help him accept things as they come and as they are since he has a hard time with this.

❣️ (In one of the game routes, he said to Yui that he has a hard time accepting things, and that he was only able to because she taught him that.) 

❣️ Aw, my bae Rei :’)

❣️ Reiji has dated before and this is canon, so he definitely knows what he wants in an s/o.

❣️ He probably met his one and only at one of the balls Karl hosted and pursed her from there.

❣️ A girl who is somewhat witty and clever in personality.

❣️ Wants a girl who will listen to him talk about his scientific theories.

❣️ Likes it if his partner will just sit down in his lab and converse with him while he works.

❣️ Girls that have a classy fashion sense—there’s nothing better to him than being with a woman who knows how to present herself.

❣️ And if she surprises him by wearing a garter belt and garter socks under her outfit, he’s sold on her.

❣️ Especially if it’s under her school uniform.

❣️ A girl that wears red lipstick, especially during special gatherings. He just loves this on a woman.

❣️ Wants a girl that’s into being hugged from behind unexpectedly, so he can whisper sweet things into her ears and place soft kisses on her shoulders and neck.

❣️ If a girl calls him ‘dear’ or ‘dearest’—he just loves the formality and that it holds such sweetness.

❣️ Girls who tie their hair up into buns or have it styled in a short, rather sophisticated, style.

❣️ A girl who teases him—I know this sounds strange since we always see Reiji being so serious, but deep down, he actually likes to let loose, especially with a woman he loves or is in fact interested in.

❣️ (In the manga, he once got a little careless with Yui. He was about to drink her blood in the school’s hall. Yui of course said no and warned that someone could catch them since they were out in plain sight, but Reiji simply responded with ‘I don’t care’—so this is an example of how Reiji lets loose and that he in fact does from time to time.)

❣️ Now going back to the teasing, he’d love it if his lover would slip off his glasses while getting intimate with him.

❣️ A girl that walks with an elegant stride—he just loves this, especially if she’s wearing heels.

❣️ And if they’re red bottoms, he’s done.

❣️ Is entranced by a girl who invites him into bed while he’s busy. That’s definitely something our bae Rei won’t refuse. Right, @liannelara-dracula?

❣️ If she’s into carriage rides—there’s just something he loves about the aesthetic, classiness, antiquity of it all.

❣️ (This is actually how transportation is the demon world—yes, they still use horse pulled carriages to get around—so you can assume that Reiji would definitely be into taking his lover on an old carriage ride from back home. He went on a carriage ride with Yui once so…)

❣️ A girl who’s into taking long walks with him under the moonlight. Reiji finds this romantic, plus, it gives him the excuse to be alone with his lover. Also likes to hold his lover’s hand in this scenario.

❣️ And if he senses that she’s in the mood, he might try something frivolous. ;))

❣️ Likes to lay down with his lover and talk under the sheets.

❣️ His hair is soft as hell, so he enjoys it when his lover runs their fingers through it while he’s the little spoon—just don’t let any of his brothers see this, they’d never let him live it down.

❣️ A girl who will be appreciative of his the bento boxes (it’s canon that Reiji likes making them). In one of the drama CDs, he made boxes for everyone and spent so much time making the food in the bentos look like each of his brothers (the listener included), it was honestly so wholesome.

❣️ Oh, my bae rei :’).

❣️ A girl who's sorta oblivious to his sexual passes sometimes. For example, she's busy doing something and he'll give her a look as he's coming towards her and goes into initiating sex.

❣️ A girl that likes having tea with him—this is a must since we all know how much Reiji enjoys his tea.

❣️ And having it with a girl he loves or is interested in, is a big thing for him. He just loves it.

❣️ Sometimes however, Reiji likes to try something different for a beverage and that would be coffee—Chemex coffee more so.

❣️ My favorite type lmao.

❣️ Anyways, he prefers this method of making coffee because it reminds him of lab related stuff. It involves a lot of precision, which he loves.

❣️ And if his s/o is interested helping him prepare it, he’s definitely into teaching them.

❣️ Apart from coffee, Reiji is definitely into the culinary arts—so he’s always trying out new recipes.

❣️ Loves it if his s/o does taste tests for him—it means so much to Reiji that someone likes his cooking and compliments him for it, along with the work he’s put in.

❣️ This man needs love, oh my-

❣️ Reiji secretly likes shooting stars (this is canon), so having an s/o that’s into stargazing and watching for shooting stars is someone he wants by his side eternally.

❣️ And you can bet that during stargazing, Rei is pretty romantic.

❣️ Initiates lots of kisses in this scenario, so an s/o that likes this type of intimacy is something he’s into.

❣️ Carnivals! It’s no secret that Reiji loves carnivals, and it’s in fact canon that he loves rollercoasters. So an s/o that’s into this type of entertainment, he’s definitely on board.

❣️ Will buy his lover anything they desire at a carnival, he’s just too precious.

❣️ A girl who shares their cotton candy with him while exchanging sweet-tasting kisses—oh yeah, he’s all for it.

❣️ Even though he loves rollercoasters, he doesn’t mind if his s/o doesn’t, but it would be a plus if she did so he could enjoy riding them with her.

❣️ If his s/o is afraid of rollercoasters, he enjoys comforting them. It’s the little things that make our bae Rei who he is. 🙂

❣️ A girl that will appreciate his motherly side such as when he gives her his blazer when she’s cold; when he brings her a hair tie because she forgot one; or when he picks her up bridal style because her shoes get soaked from the rain, or when she’s tired of walking in heels.

❣️ A girl that likes to drink wine or champagne with him. Rei not only deems this as classy, but also romantic and secretly hopes it leads to a passionate night.

❣️ Honestly, Reiji’s into a girl who starts sensual sessions.

❣️ And if his lover pulls him in by his tie, he can’t handle it. ;))

- Laito -

❣️ The girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with is someone he hopes to meet in an oblivious or adventurous way since he’s all about suspense and scandal.

❣️ He probably met his one and only in one of two ways: they were friends for years and never looked at each other that way until later, or they were strangers and had a one night stand and he couldn’t stop thinking about her afterwards and pursued.

❣️ Likes girls who are witty and wicked in humor, mostly because he’s playful in nature.

❣️ Wants a girl who can paint him like one of her French boys. xDD

❣️ A girl who is open-ended and fluid with her sexuality.

❣️ A girl who can be both dominating and submissive, and if she leans more towards the dominant side, he’s all for it.

❣️ Is into girls who can make him cream and scream in bed. xDD

❣️ A girl that will argue about who’s the bigger slut in the relationship.

❣️ “If I’ve told you once, baby, I’ve told you a thousand times—but I’m the biggest slut.”

❣️ “Oh, really?” She’d tease.

❣️ “Are you challenging me?” He’d say.

❣️ A girl who is shameless with him and will whisper seductive things into his ears—this really gets him.

❣️ And if his lover gets into a conversation with him about having children, let’s just say he wants to play Picasso. ;)))

❣️ “All this talk of about babies has inspired something in me.” She’d say.

❣️ “Oh, is that so, baby?” He’d coo, enticing further. “What could that be?”

❣️ Pulling him closer by his collar, she’d deviously whisper, “I suppose we could let that bed over there speak for us.”

❣️ A girl who wakes up on top of him, or if they’re just napping together and she sleeps on top—he really likes this and won’t hesitate to run his hands up and down her body.

❣️ A girl that goes to bed naked.

❣️ A girl who plays with his hair and running her fingers through it.

❣️ And if she takes his fedora and runs off with it, he thrives on the chase, especially if she keeps telling him to catch her.

❣️ A girl who undoes the tie of his uniform when making out with him, and if it’s at school against the lockers, it’s just his favorite.

❣️ If his one and only by any chance slides down her underwear/garter in class and passes it to him under the desks as a temporary souvenir, he simply can’t contain himself and will get her for it later.

❣️ A girl that invites him for sex and make out sessions at school is definitely his type.

❣️ Is into a girl who passes him notes that range from “you look so cute today” to “you’d look even better with your clothes off.”

❣️ Is into girls who are into ditching class to do something scandalous with him.

❣️ Girls who grab his hand while walking with him, he likes the dominance remember?

❣️ Girls who spank his ass are big turn-on for him. He just loves the amusement and the fact that they can’t keep their hands to themselves when around him.

❣️ Laito will definitely throw his lover onto a bed and get on top of them when the moment is intimate. And if his s/o takes the initiative and flips him onto his back for reversed dominance he’s all for it. Let’s face it, this dude is all about dominant women.

❣️ Girls that are into being fed, and if she feeds him, he’s done.

❣️ Girls that aren’t ashamed of lifting their skirts or dresses to heat their bums by a fireplace (refer to this image). Laito’s into a lot of weird things, so a girl doing this is just too amusing to him.

❣️ If she does this secretly at balls while by a fireplace in the grand hall, he can't resist the view and whatnot. He'll totally take advantage of this on the spot.

❣️ Or better yet, if she does it and tells him to look without doing anything, it takes everything in him to hold back.

❣️ In fact, it might inspire him to pull down his pants and try it with her.

❣️ Oh dear, I’ve said too much.

❣️ Girls that are into wearing form fitting dresses---he's all about the curvature of a woman, so this is a big turn-on for him.

❣️ Matching manicures and pedicures with his lover.

❣️ An s/o he can do the unthinkable with, such as getting nipple piercings together.

❣️ Girls that like getting caught while intimate, it only riles him up.

❣️ Girls that like breaking all the rules, especially something like curfew just to hangout with him.

❣️ If she plays the role of the “good girl” and is actually “bad” or rebellious by nature, he can’t contain himself. He loves it if his s/o plays this duo life so he can tease her for it. And he especially thrives if she’s only “bad” for him.

❣️ A girl who’s into being surprised in bed. For example, she’ll be like half asleep and he’ll wake her up by planting kisses all over her body.

❣️ A girl who laughs during sex—he finds this cute.

❣️ But why do I get the feeling that it’s mostly him who’s a laughing mess since he’s weird like that xDD.

❣️ As we all know, Laito likes to play the piano, so a girl that knows how to play is definitely a plus.

❣️ He also likes to softly tease her by laying kisses on her neck while she plays, and you can best bet this will lead to a much steamier session since he’s all about intimacy. So a girl that’s into this type of affection is someone he definitely wants as a one and only.

❣️ A girl that will pull him in by the tie, he can’t take it.

❣️ A girl that’s not ashamed of being naked, even if it’s in front of others.

❣️ A girl that will wear his hat during sex. If she pushes him down on the bed, takes his hat, puts it on, and rides him with his hat on, he’s all hers.

❣️ A girl that runs through the sprinklers in her underwear and he joins.

❣️ It happened in the front yard of the mansion once and Reiji was mad. xDD

❣️ A girl that doesn't wear underwear, even when she goes out.

- Kanato -

❣️ Girls who are into wearing transparent night gowns.

❣️ It’s the type of girl he likes to pull into bed with him anyday.

❣️ Food play—this is a big one for him, so a girl that’s into this, he’s all for it.

❣️ Like Laito, he’s into girls who are into being fed. Kanato’s very much into feeding his lover his cakes and other sweets.

❣️ Likes a girl that’s into sitting on the school stairs or benches and just talking about whatever with him.

❣️ And if the girl makes him raspberry pudding (it’s canon that this is his favorite dessert), he’s so taken back by this.

❣️ Is into a girl that’s into exchanging soft kisses and getting into steamy sessions with him.

❣️ A girl that can sing him to sleep—he’s a big fan of lullabies so being able to fall asleep to a sweet tune sung by his s/o is more than a treat to him, it’s a literal paradise.

❣️ Girls that are into wearing flower crowns, and if she wears one that he makes her, it really means everything to him.

❣️ Girls that wear bows in their hair and lean more towards a cutesy style of attire.

❣️ When it comes to romance, this boy wants to be bewitched.

❣️ He loves the game of entrancement a girl can subject onto him, mostly because he likes the mystery concept like Reiji.

❣️ When he met his s/o, it was probably by attraction at first sight and he kept it secret for a while.

❣️ Location wise, he probably met his lover in the garden outside the mansion. She was probably a guest at a party Karl was hosting and when Kanato saw his s/o, he didn’t pay much attention to them at first, but boy, was he physically attracted to them.

❣️ Stargazing—it’s simple, but rather romantic when alone with a partner.

❣️ And here, Kanato takes the opportunity to get intimate even if he’s out in nature with his lover. He’ll claim that he wants to give the stars and moon a show by making his lover drown in ecstasy. So bear in mind, he’s into a girl that’s all for this.

❣️ Is into a girl that’s into poems and if she’s into hearing them be recited by him.

❣️ Kanato really digs deep into poetry since he’s deeper than most think, so reading poetry together with his s/o is a must. It’s something he deems romantic.

❣️ Is also into a girl that will accept poetry he writes and bare in mind that what he writes it is for her and her eyes only.

❣️ Just don’t let any of his brothers read what he wrote to his lover. All hell will break loose.

❣️ Lots of pillow talk.

❣️ This man is all about those after sex talks and they range from being teasing to downright lewd, there is no awkwardness/weirdness here.

❣️ Prefers that his s/o wears a see-through slip to bed, to which he can take/rip off.

❣️ A girl that gives him devious looks from afar that hint towards sexual intentions.

❣️ If a girl has silky soft hair, he loves to run his hands through it any day.

❣️ A girl who’s scandalous but only for him.

❣️ Teasing is something he’s all for, like if she pulls the strap of his overalls to get his attention, he’s really hooked.

❣️ If a girl takes the lead in sex—that is, she's making out with him she always aims to pull down the straps of his overalls with a lot of force—and it’s quick!

❣️ Although he likes being sensual and taking his time, he likes that sometimes she rushes things because she’s eager for him. This brings out the animal in him.

❣️ If she uses lotions that smell like a fruit or soft flower. He really likes this and will compliment her for it.

❣️ Likes it if a girl goes by her full name rather than a shortened version (ex. Lian vs. Lianna). Kanato claims that a girl’s elegance and beauty is only heightened when she uses her full first name rather than something abbreviated. Hopefully that makes sense lol.

❣️ Kanato’s very much into touching his lover’s neck or stroking it in a delicate manner when a moment gets soft, or if he’s trying to get their attention. So, a girl that’s into this type of affection is someone he’s sold on.

❣️ A girl that doesn’t mind being reeled in for a sudden kiss. This man is all about passion, so he’ll randomly cup his lover’s cheeks, pull them close and kiss them, even in front of his brothers.

❣️ Idk why I didn’t mention this sooner but, tea parties are an absolute must with Kanato.

❣️ He especially likes making his lover teas that smell like flowers.

❣️ And if the universe is on his side and his lover ends up having tea drip down from the sides of their lips, he’ll take the initiative by suddenly licking it off them.

❣️ And as devious as he is, he’ll claim that he was just trying to prevent the tea from falling on their clothes ;))).

❣️ Speaking of clothes, he loves a girl who appreciates the clothes he sews for her. He’s really big on this and will sew his s/o stuff he thinks they’d look great in. After all, this man could be a fashion designer, hence @liannlara-dracula’s post about it here.

❣️ Girls that don't wear a bra to bed, mostly because it gives him the excuse to caress or grope their boobs if he decides to get initmate with them.

❣️ If she sits across from at the small table, he’ll lift up her skirt/dress with his foot—and if she returns him a devious look or smirk, he’s definitely turned on.

❣️ Likes a girl who’s into heavy eye contact, especially if she’s dancing or with someone else and he's looking from afar.

❣️ Girls who wear knee/thigh high socks.

❣️ If she pouts or gives puppy dog eyes—it really gets him. (It’s ancient, but I have a post on this subject here.)

❣️ A girl who is really sweet but maybe fragile in some sense.

❣️ He likes a girl who will allow him to brush her hair and apply makeup on her. So here, he kinda holds her by her chin and has her looking up at him. He does it in a way where he can be really close, and this invokes a lot sexual undertones since he likes to be suggestive.

❣️ Likes a girl that will be turned on by his whispers or mummers in her ear.

❣️ Likes it she plays with his hair in bed.

❣️ If she sits beside him and rests her head on his shoulder.

❣️ A girl who looks pretty when she sleeps.

- Ayato -

❣️ Ayato wants someone he can be obnoxious with and vice versa.

❣️ Is definitely into girls with attitude—and I mean attitude, it’s a turn-on for him.

❣️ Cliche but he’d probably meet his girl at school.

❣️ She’d probably someone he’d constantly try to impress from the start.

❣️ A girl that he can call “bruh” and have “bruh” moments with lmao. xDD

❣️ Pillow forts all the way—he loves a girl who’s into this.

❣️ Fuck yeah! Pillow forts society!

❣️ A girl who he can have friendly competitions with. And if she’s competitive like him, it’s a bonus and only riles him up more.

❣️ “Babe, I’ve told you a million times. You’re no match for me.” He’d boast.

❣️ “Oh really? We’ll see about that.” She’d challenge.

❣️ He claims he always lets her win in competitons, when realistically, he just lost those matches.

❣️ A girl that catches him off guard with her comebacks.

❣️ Girls that wear strappy things and that act innocent about it, he's so turned on he can't contain himself.

❣️ Pretends that he gets whatever they’re talking about sometimes (like if they’re talking about math or science for example), but he really doesn’t get it. So a girl that can see through this and still stay with him is a plus.

❣️ Cordelia probably gave him the bs talk that the girl he dates has to be ‘below’ him in every way.

❣️ She also probably told him that the girl needs to be absolutely flawless because she has to ‘represent’ him since he’s ‘the best’ but she can’t be ‘above’ him. It’s kinda like ‘the best should have the best, but not better than himself’ hopefully that makes sense haha.

❣️ We’ve all heard that some couples keep each other’s shirts/hoodies, and Ayato’s all for this.

❣️ He’s especially into keeping his lover’s bra too whilst they keep a pair of his boxers lol.

❣️ If his girl leaves her bra in his locker as a souvenir to keep instead of a shirt, he just gets off on this. It’s untraditional, but he’s all for it.

❣️ Or he may even steal his girl’s bra and keep it in his locker as a souvenir to annoy her. He’s obnoxious so an s/o that can tolerate this is a plus.

❣️ A girl who’s into wearing his clothes, he’s so into this.

❣️ Wearing his cologne—he just loves the fact if his girl smells like him, which serves as another way of him claiming his girl as his.

❣️ A girl that likes to game it. Ayato loves video games as we all know, so a girl that’s into gaming is quite the turn on for him since he can play against or with her.

❣️ A girl that forces him to go to the mall with her. He’ll act likes he’s so annoyed, but realistically, he actually likes going shopping with his girl.

❣️ He carries all the bags, especially because yours truly has to “prove” his strength haha.

❣️ And if they go into Victoria’s Secret, it’s taking everything in him to not die. Remember, boobs are his weakness.

❣️ If his girl tries on new clothes and models them, he finds this hot.

❣️ A girl who’s always trying something new with her hair, especially if she’s into dying it new colors. Ayato’s really into this.

❣️ In fact, he’ll volunteer to dye her hair and claims he’ll do a better job than anyone.

❣️ But in the end it all goes to shit because he doesn’t know what he’s doing even tho he claims to.

❣️ A girl that’s into watching TV—horror movies specifically. He tries to act composed when he watches them with his girls, but fails.

❣️ Secretly likes a girl that strokes his head/hair while watching a movie—he just has to be absoltely sure that his brothers are not home because if they are, his ego goes out the window.

❣️ Likes a girl that cooks for him, and if they make kick-ass takoyaki, he’s never letting them go–no really.

❣️ Likes a girl who forces him to help her in the kitchen.

❣️ Is into a girl who babies him. He may act like he doesn’t like it, but secretly, he likes the coddling.

❣️ A girl he can show off his strength to, and be complimented for it. He’s all about being acknowledged.

❣️ Likes a girl that leaves him love notes in his locker.

❣️ A girl that’s willing to pass frivolous notes to him, especially if she’s inviting him to a heated session in the locker room.

❣️ A girl that likes being a strip tease or posing as a thirst trap, he can’t contain himself.

❣️ A girl who’s confident in every way.

❣️ A girl who’s dominating. Yes, Ayato is perceived as the dominant one, but tbh, he can’t handle it if a girl dominates him.

❣️ Likes a girl he can be the little spoon with. Sometimes it’s hard being “the best” or least making everyone think that, so Ayato prefers a girl he can let loose with.

❣️ A girl who allows him to pat her head or scruffle her hair playfully. He likes babying his girl so.

❣️ A girl who’s into taking showers with him in the locker rooms at school, especially after those sweaty practice sessions or basketball games.

❣️ Likes to surprise his girl by walking in naked after showering and giving them an adrenaline rush.

❣️ “What’s the matter babe? Is it that jaw-dropping?” He’d smirk.

❣️ “Shut up!”

❣️ A girl that likes being carried bridal style, he just loves holding his girl like this.

❣️ Even though he has bad memories of swimming because of certain purple-haired jezebel, he likes a girl who’s willing to go swimming in the lake by the manor with him, or in the manor’s indoor pool.

❣️ And you can bet he’ll challenge her to do fancy flips to jump into the pool or racing her from one side to the other.

❣️ Like Kanato, he's also into a girl that doesn't wear a bra to bed. He likes that his girl is in this raw state, and if she’s wearing something strappy or seethrough on her chest area, he’s really riled up because he likes the view.

- Subaru -

❣️ Growing up, Subaru honestly never thought about “caring” for anyone.

❣️ He grew up in a pretty tarnished household and was subjected to a lot of trauma because of it, so loving someone was definitely the last thing on his mind.

❣️ He probably always told himself that love wasn’t real and was something only found in fairytales, or it was only a “human” thing since vampires don’t hold human emotions.

❣️ Since he’s a loner, he’s always stayed at the back of things, in the shadows more specifically.

❣️ Despite this though, don’t think that this boy hasn’t caught the attention of a few women throughout the centuries.

❣️ I mean, you can’t tell me this boy is virgin considering the way he acts with Yui. He’s more of a fuckin perv that you’d imagine, just read the manga. He’s been around for centuries, there’s honestly no way.

❣️ He’d probably meet his girl at school.

❣️ Or, if we really wanna be dramatic, he’d probably meet his girl through having to save her in a dark alley from some drunk fucks who were harassing her.

❣️ He kinda follows the trope of “I didn’t think I’d ever fall in love with that person.”

❣️ Bear in mind that our bby car is kinda oblivious to his own feelings and will not admit them easily.

❣️ Anyways, with this, he’s into girls that entrance him without saying a word to him.

❣️ This literally drives him crazy since he can’t figure out why they’re constantly on his mind.

❣️ A girl that notices him and at least says hi to him if she sees him at school, it makes this undead vampire’s heart skip a beat.

❣️ A girl that wears flowy dresses or skirts that encompass her figure beautifully if she spins. This just takes his breath away.

❣️ Girls that wear their hair in cute, short styles, but he honestly doesn’t care. He likes long hair too.

❣️ Girls that are into taking car rides with him/cruising.

❣️ And if he gets her skirt to go up while going fast, he's all for it.

❣️ If she looks out his convertible while he's driving and catches a glimpse of her ass while she's leaning over, and if she's wearing shorts, you can best bet he'll clutch/smack her ass even if he's driving just to get a reaction out of her.

❣️ A girl that doesn't mind him keeping a garter of hers in the glove box of his car.

❣️ A girl who's into car sex—there's something about the small secluded space of a car that he just loves to get intimate in.

❣️ Girls who wear hairpins and barrettes—he really thinks girls look cute with them.

❣️ A girl that has to get on her tippy toes to kiss him. He likes the height difference and that she has to try that hard to be intimate with him.

❣️ It amuses him in all honesty and he'll definitely tease her about it, saying that she's needy and eager for him.

❣️ Girls that are into having their clothes ripped off when getting intimate—like, literally.

❣️ A girl who’s confident in both body and mind. He’s insecure so he admires a girl that thinks of herself in a positive way.

❣️ A girl that likes getting drunk with him and doing stupid shit together when wasted.

❣️ If it’s a full moon, he likes to play a game of trust with his s/o–that is, by having them jump from the roof of the mansion so he can catch them.

❣️ Since the asshole can fly, he’s able to catch his girl quite easily. He’d never let his girl hit the ground, but sometimes he likes to really scare them by catching them before almost hit the ground to give them a scare since he likes teasing them.

❣️ Fuckin’ ass-

❣️ Stargazing—Subaru likes watching stars with his girl. Mostly because he can be a bit intimate with her and kiss her here and there. So a girl that’s into this, he’s all for it.

❣️ Likes a girl that will listen to him talk about his coffin (this is canon!).

❣️ Is into a girl that doesn’t mind to have sex on the couch with the tv on.

❣️ Definitely likes girl that showers with him.

❣️ He likes to tease his girl by holding things above her head so she can't reach them. He also makes things out of reach on purpose and likes it when she jumps for them, to which he comments on her being small compared to him. So a girl who can tolerate his obnoxious behavior in this sense is something he treasures.

❣️ A girl that is ticklish, he loves hearing the sound of a girl laugh as it low-key turns him on. And with that, he begins to wonder what she sounds like in bed.

❣️ Like Kanato and Ayato, he’s into a girl that doesn't wear a bra to bed.

❣️ I wonder where this preference came from? Karl maybe lmao. xDD

❣️ A girl that initiates kisses. Remember, he likes a girl who’s confident so yeah.

❣️ Is into girl he could tease to no end. He literally lives her reactions.

❣️ A girl that surprises him every once in a while with her dominance.

❣️ A first, he’ll act like he doesn’t like it, but secretly, he’s living for it. And when he gets comfortable, his girl can be prepared to be under his touch every five minutes.

❣️ Fuck I wanna be that girl jk ahaha!

❣️ A girl that doesn't mind sleeping in his coffin with him

❣️ Afterall, it’s one of his favorite places to have sex.

❣️ Is into stealing a kiss from his girl or placing one on her forehead while she’s sleeping in hopes that she don’t wake up. So a girl that figures this out, but doesn’t give him a hard time about it is something he likes.

❣️ Enjoys being in the rose garden alone with his girl where he can either drink her blood or share sweet kisses with her. So if she’s into this, he’s hooked.

❣️ It’s rare, but Subaru’s more romantic than most think. He’s into giving his girl a rose, most likely from the mansion’s garden, but this is not often. And if she accepts it, it’s more than enough for him to blush like an idiot.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Well, I got here. Listened to the entire John Oliver-era run of The Bugle between late March and June 2022, had a small breakdown and decided that clearly the end of this means nothing gold can stay and there’s no future to look forward to (to be fair to me, the way John Oliver left the podcast was really drawn out to be as painful an ending as possible, also I had some difficult stuff going on in my actual life and being upset about a podcast was just a projection of that, but even considering those mitigating factors, I still got more upset than a podcast hiatus warranted). I then spent a few weeks unable to bring myself to listen to any other episodes because I thought I’d just spend the whole time refusing to like the new thing and being upset that it wasn’t the old thing, until the coup against Johnson occurred in early July and not enough topical comedy shows were running so I turned to The Bugle to get some takes on it, and I realized that I actually can get through a non-Oliver-based Bugle episode without it being the end of the world. So then I went back and started listening to the post-Oliver episodes from the beginning of them, with a bit of a rocky start as my brain does object to change, but as it went along I got used to them and began to accept that sometimes some things can be good even if they’re not exactly like the things I liked before. Maybe.

That was 177 episodes ago. Here I am at episode 177, the last episode of 2020, the famed reunion episode, featuring John Oliver back on the podcast for the first time since he unceremoniously (and seriously, very slowly and painfully) fucked off in 2016. And really in 2015, since he was gone for the last seven months of 2015 even though they kept putting out filler episodes saying he’d be back imminently, but he didn’t come back until one episode in March 2016 and then almost one more 2016 episode but that one didn’t really happen, and then they kept saying they’d get it going again until suddenly he showed up in June said actually he’s done, and seriously, John, you’re a wonderful person but that was not your best handled situation, professionalism-wise.

Anyway. That said, here we are in December 2020, and here they are, and I’m feeling a completely normal and healthy number of emotions about it. Like three or four emotions - five tops, I swear. They started putting out videos of some Bugle recordings earlier in 2020 and I have not watched those because this is meant to be an audio newspaper, but obviously I’m watching the video version of this one. This video has come up in my YouTube recommendations many times before, of course. I’ve seen clips of it shared and referenced on this site a couple of times. I have always resisted the temptation to watch any of it, thinking I’d appreciate it more if I save it for when I actually get there in my chronological Bugle listening. And here I am.

So far, I’ve just started watching it and I have one comment: at 5:17, John Oliver says the words “fucking disgrace”, but it gets bleeped out, as swear words almost always do on The Bugle. Just after that, you can see Producer Chris look down and clearly make a note. I’m pretty sure he’s marking the timestamp so it’ll be easier when he goes back later to censor the swearing. That is somewhat like something I do when I listen to The Bugle, or for that matter any other podcast or TV show episode, and I hear something of sufficient interest for me to think I should write about it on this blog. I mark the timestamp in the notes app on my phone, so I can easily go back there to cut out a video or audio clip and upload it here, and/or type out a transcript of what was said, and/or just re-watch/re-listen to it so I can remember what I wanted to write about it. To often since starting this blog, I have spent too much time searching through episodes of something to try to find the little snippet I wanted to write about, and I save myself a lot of time when I note timestamps as I go along. It makes me inordinately happy to see Producer Chris do something similar to that, except with swear words he has to bleep out.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Looking for a Place to Happen 2

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), age gap, general stupidity, some violence and threats

This is dark!biker!Sam Wilson x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s lots happening in Birch and you find it all too amusing.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, Little Bones, and Fully Completely

Note: Here’s chapter two. Think I’ll probably slow down writing. Appreciate y’all.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 2: I follow every little whiff

💀💀💀

You gave yourself a day off that week. Rather, the desolation of Birch allowed you an excuse to get away from your desk. An internet outage across the town had you up and wandering the main road just after noon. Your grandmother refused to join you so she was left to her true crime novel and the weekday droning of talk show hosts.

After a peek in the book shop where you picked out some used thrillers for your nan and a guilty splurge on one of Babs' pies to add to the surprise, you stopped by the diner and had some soup to warm up from the unrelenting cold. You played around on your phone as you blindly slurped from your spoon. With no available connection, you swapped candies to achieve a score high enough to get to the next round.

After another loss, you put your screen down and added some pepper to the tomato soup. You leaned your chin in your hand and peered across the road. The Asp was just diagonal from The Chipped Saucer and from your seat by the window you could see the comings and goings of the dingy bar.

You chuckled to yourself as you remembered the hundreds of comments on your video. You weren't entirely surprised that the internet cheered at the sight of a woman beating up a man in broad daylight, you'd seen much worse on the web. But many were curious and asked about how it started and about the small town alluded to in the caption.

You picked up your phone and flipped open the camera. You pointed it through the glass as one of the many bikers strutted out of the bar and down the street. You knew him, like most in town, he was the leader's right hand man. Steve Rogers. He had an odd gait, rigid with long strides, and you remember Kelly used to make fun of him when you walked home from school. That felt like forever ago.

You ended the video and dropped your phone again. You'd send it to Kelly when the outage was over. It would be a good laugh. Plus, you hadn't heard from her much since she moved to the city.

You finished your soup and paid. You went out into the street and cut around to the backstreets. You made your way back to your nans and found Pippin scratching at the front door. You stopped and scooped him up before you let yourself in.

"Don't like the snow, do ya?" You set him down and he whipped his tail before skittering off, "hey nan, I got you some stuff."

"You spend too much," she grumbled as you hung your coat and grabbed her treats.

"Only on you," you sang as you entered the front room, "sugarless blueberry pie, your fave, and some books about murder and all that freaky stuff you love."

"Hmm," she watched you put the pie and books down on the coffee table, "suppose the pie will go good with tea."

"Ah, and I suppose I'll be making that tea?" You returned.

"My arthritis…" she pouted but her grin came through.

"Yeah, yeah," you snickered as you went to the kitchen to put on the kettle, "we going black today or something lighter?"

"Put on some of the pekoe," she called back, "make a whole pot."

"Will do, ma'am," you trilled and basked in her annoyed mutter.

💀

When the internet came back, you sent of an email to inform the agency of the interruption and promised to meet your deadlines. Then you puttered around and added a caption to the video before you sent it off to Kelly; 'why he walk like that tho'. She sent a series of crying emojis back and told you to post it.

'Nah, it's a dumb joke.' You typed back.

'Saw ur last vid, ppl will eat it up,' she insisted.

'Well, got nothing else to put up. The account’s dying since no one cares about my writing.'

'DO IT.' Her words sealed your resolve and you uploaded the video with some dramatic music in the background.

The response was almost instantaneous. Several comments saying they were happy to see more and others being for another video. 'We all wanna see inside this fucked up town' one added and several latched on. Ignoring the questions of where this was, you gave a thin promise of future small town thug content. 

You turned back to your work email and opened up your draft for your next gig. You couldn't help but smile as you went over your work. You might have just found your niche.

💀

You knew your nan would lose it if she knew you were snooping around the club, so you didn’t tell her. You went down, made her breakfast, went back upstairs to do your work, then tiptoed out in the late afternoon to poke around town for something to upload. Birch was so dull when you lived there but to those outside, it was a novelty you were all too eager to provide.

You got more videos of the bikers; some revving their bikes, others arguing, but there was nothing overly usable. You were getting bored of it until the man himself walked out of the bar. You record the man’s glower expression as he marched down the sidewalk and turned off just down the way.

‘His name is Bucket… wtf?!’ you keyed in and snorted as you waited for it to load to your account.

Still, there was nothing special going on, like always in Birch, and your grandmother was bound to get suspicious if you kept sneaking around. You went back and hid your phone before she could bitch about it. You cooked her dinner and sat with her as your thoughts swung between work and your TikTok.

You went to bed but couldn’t sleep. You ended up watching YouTube on your phone as the windows shook with the night winds. It wasn’t until the darkness began to glow that you were roused from the cocoon of your comforter. You looked out and saw smoke coming from the main road.

You didn’t think before you pulled on your jeans and shoved your feet into your slipper, unconcerned about them soaking through as you barreled down the stairs, the sleeves of your hoodie only half on. The back door bounced behind you and you crunched down into the snow and clamored past the row of lifeless houses. 

You were out of breath as you got to the end of the path and rounded the diner to gape over at the burning garage. You got closer as the line of bikers stood in their leather with breath puffing before them in the frigid night. You stepped back into the shadow of the brick façade of the realty office and swiped your camera open.

Your hands shook and you struggled to steady the image on the screen as the mechanic woman raged in only her tee shirt. You didn’t quite understand what was going on; only that her garage was up in smoke and then men were doing nothing to smother it. She swung at the dark haired man and spat at several others; “cowards”... “fuck all of you!”

You gulped and held your breath as she was dragged away by the large redheaded henchman of the slender outsider. She fought for a moment before she was flung over his shoulder and the biker followed their leader back to The Asp. You sidled in between the building and hid until the voices faded into the wind.

Well, that would be a hell of a video. It might even go viral.

💀

Your phone did not stop. You almost felt bad as you saw the screen limn the edges of your cell as you left it face down on the little table beside the couch. Your nan sat in her rocking chair talking away on her corded phone to Linette from down the road. You suspected that every other person in town was gossiping about the same thing; the fire.

You finished your coffee and rubbed your eyes as you checked the time and ignored the pulsing notifications. It was too much to keep up with.

Your grandmother hung up and sighed, “can’t believe it. You hear?”

“Hear what?” you pretended ignorance.

“That old garage burned down. The one with the lady,” she said, “pity. When I was a girl, that place was a salon. Ma used to take us there to get our hair cut. The barber would give us wrapped candies and pretend to cut himself with his scissors.”

“Oh? It burned down?” you weren’t sure you were very convincing but you also could just say you saw it happen.

“Yep, no one really can say. You know, maybe she was welding or some rag caught, but I bet my money on those bikers,” she sneered.

“Good thing you’re poor,” you kidded, “and why the bikers?”

“Oh, well, you know Kimmy, Linette’s girl, works down at the diner and she saw that mechanic arguing with one of those strangers, the ones dealing with the club men. Well, it’s no coincidence that trouble follows those leather jackets around,” she rocked as she nodded knowingly, “oh, one of the boys I knew back in the day, he was found burnt up with his bike. They said the tank blew… well, I saw it and that tank was pristine.”

“Nan,” you gasped, “you… Jesus.”

“Well, things don’t change in Birch, we just get older,” she continued, “when you’re young, everything seems new but then you age and it’s all just the same.”

“Wow, how… inspiring,” you said dryly.

“Girlie, you gotta be careful,” she intoned, “that fire, that’s a lesson to all the women in this town. To everyone. You don’t cross the Commandos.”

“I don’t think anyone--”

“That’s another thing, there has never been a shortage of stupid people, not now not then,” she girded, “those women who get tied up in that club, their lives are already done.”

You frowned and hid your phone in your pocket as you stood. You rubbed your neck and picked up your empty mug, “I should get started.”

“Mmm,” she said as she dialed the phone again, “I wonder if Fran knows yet.” 

💀

You were being really fucking stupid but peer pressure was not a logical thing. Even through a screen, you found it hard to resist the goads. So there you were, your phone in your hand as you live-streamed your walk down to The Asp. The data costs alone would make you regret it but you were caught up in the hype of you fifteen second of internet fame.

“Alright,” you stopped across the street and gave a view of the moniker with Cleopatra sultrily looking down at you, “this is it… I just gotta play it cool…” you turned the lens towards you and smiled nervously, “hopefully that dude at the front doesn’t stop me.”

Comments flicked up the bottom of the screen so fast and smilies and hearts floated up the side around your face. You crossed the screen as you turned your phone against your coat and approached the bar door. The large biker butted out his smoke and you bared your teeth nervously. He didn’t stop you as he rolled his shoulders and coughed.

You entered to the noise of classic rock and low voices, the clink of glasses and tap of chalk on marble. You glanced around and quickly swept your phone around to give a view of the patrons. You hurried over to the bar and climbed up on a stool.

“You need a drink?” the woman behind the bar scowled. She looked worn out even with her lips painted bright pink and her eyes clouded with blue shadow.

“Uh, sure, can I… can I get one pint of everything you have on tap?” you asked as you set your phone down and shrugged out of your coat. You draped it over the next stool and reposition your phone as you flipped the cam and used the built in stand on the case to angle yourself onto the screen.

“Sure,” she narrowed her eyes and glanced past you.

You swung your feet as you waited for her to pour the five pints; some with too much foam and the others with no head at all. You took the first and held it up for the camera.

“A classic, BudLight,” you held it up to the light, “no head and…” you sipped, “flat.” You plunked it down and coughed as you grabbed the next, “this is a raddler?” you looked at the tap for confirmation, “grapefruit… smells like piss…” you had a sip, “tastes like it too.”

You chuckled to yourself and asked for a water. You made a show of swishing it around in your mouth before you moved onto the third beer.

“Had to cleanse the palate,” you joked, “now… lots of foam on this one, dark. You know, I’m pretty surprised they have Guinness here but let’s see…” you tasted it and crinkled your nose, “that’s it. Exactly like toilet water!”

You read some of the comments telling you to check the bottles for bugs and laughed. Suddenly you were yanked off the stool by the back of your shirt and your phone was swiped up by another man as the first restrained you. You struggled against his thick arm as it hooked around your neck and the leader of their crew stared at the screen of your cell.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he snarled as he hit the screen with his thumb but the stream kept going. He dropped the phone to the floor and stomped it instead.

“This is the bitch posting about us online,” the man at your back growled. It was Steve, the one with the weird walk.

“I doubt either of you know how to use a computer,” you scoffed, “hey, let me go.”

“And why would we do that when you’re snitching to the whole world, sweetheart?” Bucky kicked your phone away as he crossed his arms.

“Actually, I’m--” you grasped Steve’s arm as it threatened to get tighter, “--promoting your trash business. I was just having a tasting, if you had just asked--”

“Shut up!” Bucky stepped closer and brought your legs up and stopped him as you planted your feet against his stomach.

“Hey,” a woman’s voice came from behind the bar as the waitress shoved aside her empty tray, “hey, she’s just a kid.”

“Bullshit,” Bucky huffed, “she looks full-grown to me.”

“So what are you gonna do?” she said, “she’s young. You can’t--”

“Don’t tell me what I can’t do,” he snapped.

“She’s right,” another voice intoned and that man, Sam, came up beside them with a pool cue in hand, “she’s just goofing around.”

“She’s a rat,” Steve insisted.

“You’re being dramatic. It’s called a meme and you do walk a little strange,” he chuckled, “no one’s gonna follow her breadcrumbs back to this shithole anyway.”

Bucky considered Sam and then looked at Steve. He poked his cheek with his tongue and sucked his teeth.

“So… you vouching for her?” Bucky asked.

“She won’t cause any more trouble, promise,” Sam said, “I’ll make sure of it.”

“You better,” Bucky snapped his fingers and you were released, “get her out of here.” 

[thosewickedlovelies]

Into the Woods: chapter 2  |  Frankie Morales x GN!Reader

Summary: Instagram stalking ensues. Will you run into Frankie again?

Tags: no warnings AGAIN this is weird for me too but as mentioned I do have some smut planned for these two if anyone needs more incentive to read lmfao

Word Count: 2,783

A/N: As always, endless love to @yoditorian for this idea and her supervision of my writing about a social media platform I do not use 💗💚💗

Backstory / chap 1 /

---

Later that night, Frankie sits at his desk, poring over maps both digital and physical. Where could you live to have traveled to the same point in the forest as him within a day? He’s hiked along the edge of his side of the woods, and knows that unless he’s missed some major construction, you can’t be there. So now he studies the other side of the treeline, looking at the closeness of the towns, any tiny side roads that could lead to individual houses like his own. But his frustration is growing.

There aren’t any. Not any within feasible walking distance, at least. And you hadn’t been grubby enough to have been camping. Frankie frowns, tracing the small highway which cuts through the forest. There, not far from the turnoff to his home, was a parking lot at the start of a web of trails through the woodland. If you started there and completely ignored the predetermined paths, heading a course straight for the pond...

“Huh,” Frankie murmurs. It wasn’t much further of a hike than his own. So that means you don’t live within walking distance- he shakes off an odd twinge of disappointment at that- but he does have an idea of your hiking range, if he felt like trying to seek you out.

He shakes his head. Don’t be weird. That was something Santiago might do- deliberately roam where he knew you regularly went in order to find you again. Frankie isn’t nearly so forward. His style is slower, less aggressive. What he’s already planning is his next cooking trip to the pond. Plants need water, and you forage for plants- he figures it’s a likely spot to run into you a second time.

Frankie hadn’t spoken to you again after you’d parted today. Only caught glimpses of you through the trees, from where he had dutifully remained by his fire. But at some point between the twisting of the campfire smoke from one way to another you had vanished, and not long after, Oso had returned to him, flopping down on her side with a satisfied huff.

He snorted. “Well, I’m glad you got to make a new friend.” Frankie rubbed her belly with only a little jealousy.

Now, feeling restless, he decides to upload the pictures he took today. He’s almost immediately distracted, however, by a string of likes from a new follower- concluding with a familiar photo of Oso and Gloriana. A prickle of excitement runs through him at a reference to foraging in the username. No way.

Frankie leans forward in his seat, straining for a closer look at the profile picture. A grin spreads across his face when the page finally loads.

It’s you. You, mid-laugh, perched comfortably up on a sturdy tree branch. He quickly scrolls down to confirm; but this is definitely you. Lots of photos of plants, and woodland that looks remarkably familiar. Your bare feet in a stream. A busy street at afarmer’s market, you smiling with a stall owner.

Frankie laughs out loud at the sheer absurdity of it. Here he was, worried about coming off as a mega-creep, and you’ve already shamelessly checked him out on instagram. He’s never hit ‘Follow Back’ so fast in his life.

--

You try to quash the squirmy anticipation in your belly as you pull on your pack, organizing yourself for the walk ahead. There’s no reason to get excited, you scold yourself. Even if you do see Frankie again, you still don’t really know anything about him.

You’d tried to stalk him online, but there wasn’t much information to go off of from his instagram photos. The pictures themselves spoke volumes, though. You’d always thought you could tell a little something of people’s personalities from what they posted, especially from pictures with their friends. Frankie’s main group of friends had a certain look about them- military maybe, a sort of cocky surety in their posturing. Despite this, they’re often grinning in candid moments, a relaxed, unself-conscious affection between the men which endeared them to you. Them, and Frankie. It’s a shame he doesn’t post more photos of himself. You recall again the sight of him in the woods, shafts of sunlight striking his expressive features, illuminating his kind smile and earthen eyes.

Then you shake your head. Too much time alone with your ever-churning thoughts have you romanticizing your meeting, when in reality you have no reason to expect to run into him again. He’d said he was out there all the time, but you’d never spotted evidence of any fires, or of a giant dog gallivanting around the place. Maybe he didn’t mean the pond specifically, but the forest in general.

“Argh!” Looking around, you stomp your foot in frustration. In your distraction, your walking pace had slowed, and you weren’t as far along in your hike as you should have been. Resolving to focus on your surroundings (because you won’t see Frankie again if you don’t get to the pond in good time), you splash some water on your face to refresh yourself and stride onward.

As you get closer to your pond, you slow down again, this time deliberately. All your senses strain for any sign of Frankie, but you don’t hear or see anything out of the ordinary. Then you smell it.

Smoke.

For a moment you panic. Is it wildfire season? Can you run away from a forest fire? Who do you call for this??

Then you smell something else- something familiar and edible- and you nearly pop yourself in the forehead. Of course you smell smoke, you idiot. What did Frankie say he did out here?? Cooked. You were literally just thinking about his instagram.

What is that smell? You have got to see this.

You step carefully to avoid making too much noise in the brush. Now that you’re looking for it, the gray haze of campfire smoke is obvious as it drifts through the trees. You give its source a wide berth, hoping for a chance to observe Frankie without him knowing.

Your wish is granted. You’ve come at him from the side, and now have an excellent view of his profile, his eyes narrowed in concentration as he stirs something in the heavy-looking pan in front of him. After a minute he looks satisfied, and retrieves the pan’s lid from behind him, arcing his arm carefully over the flames as he places it. Frankie sits back, a gusty sigh blowing from his lips.  As you watch, he tosses his cap to the side, running his hands through loose curls and scratching his fingers across his scalp. You bite your lip in a smile at the sight of his moment of self-indulgence.

You scan Frankie’s setup and the area around him, searching for-

“Ruff!” The dog you were looking for crashes through the bushes beside you, and you yelp in surprise, automatically stooping to soothe her.

Dammit, how does such a large animal keep sneaking up on you?

“Oso?” Frankie calls. He’s standing now, still hatless, a few steps closer to you than where he’d been sitting. He glances uncertainly between the fire and your approximate location. You hear him try your name next.

You swear quietly. “No, not you,” you add to Oso.

“It’s me,” you reply, straightening. “Sorry, Oso got me again.”

The pleased, upward tilt of his lips reverses as he shakes a stern finger at his dog, whose ears perk happily at all the attention. “What did I tell you? No more accosting strangers!” he scolds, though he doesn’t sound the least bit upset.

With a expectant glance at you, Oso trots back over to him. Frankie ruffles her ears, definitively undermining any negative impact his words might have had. You regard each other tentatively.

“Hi,” you say lamely.

His face crinkles back up into a smile. “Hi,” he returns. “Fancy seeing you here.”

Every possible conversation you’d mentally practiced since your first meeting flew right out of your head. “Well, you know.” You shrug lightly. “A person’s gotta eat.” Inwardly you cringe.

But Frankie is unphased. “I’d be really interested to hear about the kinds of stuff you find out here. This is almost ready, if you don’t feel like foraging for your lunch today.” He gestures behind him to the pan on the fire.

You hesitate, and Frankie seems to sense your uncertainty. “Only if you want.” He holds his hands up in a universal ‘no pressure’ sign, even going so far as to take a step back in emphasis.

You tell yourself to stop being so paranoid. This is what you wanted, after all. All your curiosity comes surging back as the wind shifts and the smell of his cooking sets your stomach growling. “Okay,” you agree. “Yeah, that would be nice.”

“Great!” Frankie beams. He turns- and promptly trips over Oso, still sitting beside him.

“Fuck!” He curses, hands hitting the ground on the other side of his dog.

You clap a hand over your mouth to muffle your laughter. Is he always this prone to falling over? “Are you okay?” You make your way over to them.

“Yeah.” Now upright, Frankie seems flustered to find you so much nearer than before, his gaze flitting over you before he remembers himself. He turns to crouch by the fire again, snatching up his hat and re-securing it on his head.

You seat yourself a short distance away and observe. Oso has reclined on her belly on Frankie’s other side, her eager gaze fixed on the pan as he prods the food. Apparently deeming it finished, he retrieves three paper bowls from his bag and fills one each for you, himself, and Oso. With a small flourish and a nervous smile, he presents yours to you.

“Thank you.” You feel like maybe you should say something else, but he’s already moved to face Oso, murmuring something to her while he gives her her bowl. You decide to let the food do the talking.

And are glad you did when fresh, vibrant flavors flood your tongue. Your eyes flutter wide with surprise. “Wow, this is...incredible. How did you..?” You look between the steaming pan and his rucksack, unable to reconcile the feast of flavors in your bowl with how much you’d have to carry out here to achieve it.

The man blushes at your praise, gaze lowering briefly to hide his pleasure, but he looks back up at your question. “Trade secrets,” Frankie says solemnly. Then he drops the expression with a little laugh, his confidence clearly bolstered by your amazement.

“Just kidding, I’ll tell you. If-” he points his plastic spoon at you “-you tell me how we haven’t crossed paths before.”

That’s a fair deal, especially if it means you get to learn more about him. “I’ll do my best,” you promise. In between bites, you outline your gradual exploration of your surroundings upon moving into a nearby village a little over two years ago. This year, you decided to strike out into new territory- this forest.

“I found this pond pretty quickly and saw the blackberry bushes right at the end of the season last year. I’ve been coming here ever since, keeping an eye on it I guess. But this whole wood is really a gold mine.”

Frankie looks fascinated. “I had no idea. I know some plants, but I couldn’t even begin to guess what all is out here.” His mouth opens to ask more questions, but it’s your turn now.

“What about you?” you quiz. “How have I not seen you before if you’re out here ‘all the time’?”

“Well, I’ve been working my way over from the other side of the hill.” Frankie explains, gesturing to the gentle ascending slope behind him. “I only found this place earlier this year. Didn’t know it was someone else’s territory.” He offers an apologetic grin, and you duck your head, feeling a silly, pleased warmth in your cheeks.

“Anyway, I moved into my place over there about five years ago? But I had a lot to do at first. I made a ton of improvements to the house, I was starting a garden. The hiking was kind of a refuge from that at first, a way to quiet my thoughts when I was stressing myself out.” He admits this last part without looking at you, as if his stress is somehow something to be ashamed of.

“But then I realized that I actually enjoyed it, and it made me feel safer to know the woods in so much detail. So I made it a hobby. Started taking longer walks, mapping where I’d been. Brought whole meals instead of little snacks,” he adds wryly.

You laugh as his humor registers, completely engrossed in Frankie’s tale. He seems to notice this suddenly, and shuffles a little under your attention. “So that’s me,” he concludes, clearing his throat self-consciously.

Any foraging you intended to do today has long been forgotten. You’ve been sitting with your backpack on long enough that your shoulders have begun to ache, and you sling it off impatiently. Frankie seems to further relax himself at the sight of you settling in, leaning back on his hands, his empty bowl given to Oso to lick clean.

There’s one question that hasn’t been answered. “...so how did you end up on instagram?” you probe.

He laughs outright. “I wondered how long it would take you to ask,” Frankie teases. His lopsided grin suggests he knows the impression he gives off. His mirth is infectious, and you find yourself grinning back at him, although you refuse to be embarrassed. He was the one who had thrown his phone at you, after all. And he had stalked your profile right back.

“Well, I’m no photographer,” he begins. “But I like the act of taking pictures. Really stopping and looking at what’s around you, what captures your attention. I was in the army before this, and it was just in-and-out of so many places, not actually experiencing anywhere for real…” Frankie watches you from the corner of his eye, speaking slowly, as if reluctant to say something which might change your opinion of him.

“My friend’s wife- the one whose kid I’m godfather to- suggested I use instagram as a way to organize my photos, but also ‘so they know I’m still alive out here.’” He chuckles. “I kinda like it now- it’s like a public diary. Mostly it was a relief to find that I’m not the only weirdo out there who likes cooking in the woods.”

You breathe a laugh reflexively, but your mind is turning over his words. I keep an instagram, he’d said before. Like a diary. Well, that’s...really cute, actually.

“Well, that makes me feel really shallow,” you joke, unable to think of any deeper response to his unexpectedly meaningful answer.

“Nah.” Frankie dismisses your quip with an easy smile. He asks you about yourself, then. How you got into foraging, other questions inspired by the pictures he’d seen on your page.

For awhile you converse with the uncomplicated lightness of two strangers who know absolutely nothing about each other, but want to. As a dessert offering, you take out the tub of blackberries you’d gathered earlier. Frankie’s eyes widen at their size, fatter than any berry he’d see in the supermarkets.

His freely shared emotions- fascination, curiosity, delight- continue to confirm your impression of him. Safe. His mouth works as he savors the sweet fruit, lips puckering, head nodding in close-eyed approval.

You will yourself not to stare. Looking elsewhere, you glance up at the sky- and the angle of the sun sends you leaping to your feet. “Shit-”

Frankie startles. “What’s wrong?” He tenses, but remains seated. Oso jerks to wakefulness where she’d been dozing by his side.

“I’ve got to start back if I don’t want to be out here at night.” Hurriedly you check your phone to be sure of the time, your heart rate slowing upon seeing it’s not as late as you thought.

Frankie stands now to hand you back your container, still mostly full of berries. You pause. “Keep it,” you tell him. “Make yourself a campfire dessert.”

His lips part in surprise, but you step back before he can protest. “Or at least take them as a thank you. For the food...and the company.”

He purses his lips. “All right. I’ll save making dessert for next time, though.” He subtly searches for your reaction to his implied invitation.

Anticipation lightens your limbs, but you keep your feet firmly planted on the earth. “Next time.” You’re not sure you manage to smother the excitement in your smile.

---

Taglist: @thirstworldproblemss, @leonieb, @computeringturtle, @tobealostwanderer

[radramblog]

Album Discussion- The Fall of Troy

Last week I discussed an album that, more or less, was defined by looseness and empty spaces. This might as well be the polar opposite of that.

(man no-one seems to have uploaded this album art in high res)

Released in 2003, The Fall of Troy is a self-titled mathcore/post-hardcore/screamo debut album made by 3 17 year olds- and in some ways that shows, but it’s not like they were fresh, they’d had two EPs under a different name by that point. The Fall of Troy is probably best known by their song F.C.P.R.E.M.I.X., having been featured as a bonus track in Guitar Hero III, which is notably, not on this album. Rather, their second album, Doppelganger, had a few tracks that were basically retakes of songs from this first album. But we’re not talking about Doppelganger (and I still can’t find a bloody CD of it), we’re talking about The Fall of Troy, by The Fall of Troy, so let’s bloody well dive in.

The first song on here, Rockstar Nailbomb!, is as much a statement of intent as anything I’ve ever seen. It’s starts with hoarsely screamed, incomprehensible vocals over a frenetic set of guitar riffs, that cuts back into a more traditional song structure, you know, after a bit. Like any good opener, it’s introducing what you’re going to be getting from the album- songs that, while extremely energetic, tend to cut between sung vocals and screamed ones at a moment’s notice, complex and overlapping guitar riffs, and a very deliberately unpolished sound. The technical skill on display is incredible considering the age of the band, as well. For such a short song, Rockstar Nailbomb! goes in some real places, closing with a line that would be appropriate to finish off the album as a whole- but of course, we’re just getting started.

The next song is called Spartacus, and it shows off the talent of the drummer in a way that the previous didn’t. Unfortunately, I almost feel like this song was kind of a half-formed idea, considering it’s a minute and a quarter long, and the…squeal…? Near the end is kind of offputting. A mid one.

Oh boy it wouldn’t be a nerd band without ridiculous track names- next up is The Circus That Has Brought Us Back to These Nights (Yo Chocola), and no I don’t fucking know what that means. This one ironically feels the most like a song than the others before it, a slightly more traditional structure, the screaming and singing vocals forming something of a call-and-response that would probably make more sense if I could understand the lyrics half the time. Despite this, it’s no less speedy, frantic, and intricate, mixes between melody and dissonance that are basically the band’s signature.

The fourth track is named Mouths Like Sidewinder Missiles, and it’s one of my favourite tracks on the album. I can’t really describe why, though, so I’m going to take a minute to talk about something else. See, this is one of the tracks that was redone for Doppelganger, and on Spotify, for whatever reason, has the title misspelled “Misssiles”. I let them know about this years ago and they never fixed it, so I guess this is my callout post. For what it’s worth, I think the Doppelganger version is a bit looser, adding in some elements in the empty space (there’s a reverb after the initial riff I really love), but both have their own merits.

Okay, mild rant over, back to regular old rambling. The next track is The Last March of the Ents, Lord of the Rings reference very much intended. This is one of those tracks I always forgets exists to be honest, like the intro started and I was like…what was this one again? And then the bit at like 50 seconds came in and I remembered everything. That section is honestly really strong, though unfortunately the rest of the track kinda feels just like Mouths like Sidewinder Missiles, but like, slightly worse? Which is especially awkward considering it immediately proceeds that song. I will say the part of the song where it slows alllll the way down is really enjoyable, it’s very gradual and smooth, gives the bass a bit of time to shine, before blowing back up again because these guys just can’t bear to play slow for half a minute.

The next track is F.C.P.S.I.T.S.G.E.P.G.E.P.G.E.P. This is the song that their most popular track, F.C.P.R.E.M.I.X. is a version of, and they’ve never actually stated what the acronym is for. A common (and I believe discredited) suggestion is, and I quote, “Fuck condoms, premarital sex is the shit, get ‘er pregnant get ‘er pregnant get ‘er pregnant”, which is A Take. It also has nothing to do with the lyrics of the song itself. This track is actually by far the loosest and slowest on the album completely, appropriate considering it’s first words are “slow down”. There’s really not a lot of screaming on it, left only to the chorus, and they’re actually understandable which is nice (or maybe it’s just because I know it’s “come running home”). This is undoubtedly an emo track, based on the lyrics, but it’s also just kind of excellent, similarly complex lyrics slowed down to a comprehensible tempo and a bridge that builds in a supremely satisfying manner. The comparison to R.E.M.I.X. is of course, inevitable, and I will say the tightening up did help in some places- the very slow section at the latter part of the song probably doesn’t need to go that long, and that’s easily the part that gets sped up most in the redo. Still, the song stands out very naturally, feeling more thoughtful and controlled than its peers.

The next song is titled “Whacko Jacko Steals The Elephant Man’s Bones”, apparently a reference to…a music video where Michael Jackson danced next to a recreation of the skeleton of a famously deformed man. Yeah, ok, sure. I don’t actually have much to say about this one, it’s very scream-led, but doesn’t really stand out to me apart from the naming. It’s play rating supports this, being the second least listened track here, but it’s by no means bad. It’s just kinda long and as generic as something like this can be, I suppose. Honestly I kinda forgot all the directions this goes, some of these sections are really quite excellent, but the song is probably like 2 minutes longer than it needed to be. I’m just saying. Like I kept waiting for this song to try and change my mind and it kinda just didn’t.

Reassurance Rests in the Sea is up next, and god that little riff it’s building around, that just noodles around but at triple speed, is just so sick. It’s a song that spends a lot more time cutting itself down- like F.C.P.etc. it’s looser and slower, but substantially more disjointed than that one is. This song, uh, completely breaks off like two minutes in and just stops. And becomes a different song. Like, I don’t think this is a bonus track or anything, it’s just a part of the same song. And that second half is a really sort of chill (for this album) instrumental, lead by a bassline that slowly gets more riffs over the top of it. And then that bit stops itself, and the main song returns again for like the final half a minute or so. And honestly I was just like, wait, no, go back…….

The actual least listened to track on the album is number 9, The Adventures of Allan Gordon (it’s apparently about a book). Honestly, I’d kinda love to hear this live, because the first minute or so of it is the kind of thing you’d play as an interstitial to keep the audience going while you get your shit ready for the next song. Eventually (and I mean eventually, song’s a third through at this point) the lyrics and such come in, and yeah ok I see why this one isn’t as popular. It’s like, fine? Like, that cut back section is pretty overall mediocre, but when we get back to the screaming and the riffs and the noise its as solid as ever. It’s a little frustrating, because they can do the more lyrical stuff, F.C.P. is right there, but this one doesn’t quite make the mark for me. A shame.

Track 10 is I Just Got This Symphony Goin’, which does not have an actual symphony, but it does present and absolutely killer opening riff, so it’s not all bad. This is one of the songs I most associate with the album, even if it’s one of the ones also on Doppelganger. Its speeding up and slowing down and screaming and singing and lots of interweaving and yeah. I like it. Iunno.

The final song, What Sound Does a Mastodon Make? (I dunno, ask a paleontolgist?), is a full seven minutes, 2 minutes longer than the next longest track. It’s kind of interesting, since the second half of the album going by tracks is much much longer than the first half. It does this really fun bit where the lead guitar and rhythm guitar do their own little call and response thing, immediately followed by one of the weirdest vocal noises I’ve ever heard, and I don’t have a word to describe it, so you’re gonna have to either trust me or listen to it yourself. This song is just really, really long, man, and it goes in a lot of places but none of them are exceptional enough to really justify slogging through a total 7 minutes of it. I’m going to be honest, I’m probably not going to listen to it unless I’m going through the whole album. The extended build near the end is pretty sick, I guess? And the way the last minute just decides to, like, drop everything, and just end with a very quiet, indie-esque instrumental. Like the very “we did it, now we can relax” sort of moment. Lets both you and the band know its over, and you can move on past your energy high to something a bit more chill.

I think the best phrase I can use to describe The Fall of Troy is “ADHD music”. Both in that it feels almost a little distractable sometimes, multidirectional and often not fully resolving its lines, and also in that said lines are great if you’re someone like myself who’s brain needs something to be chewing over while the more conscious parts are trying to do something else. To be clear, I consider this a compliment. Like most music I discuss, this certainly isn’t for everyone, as you’re going to need a tolerance for adrenaline and screaming to enjoy this album, but I do think it’s worth the attempt. Now, I haven’t listened to Doppelganger (or any of the other albums for that manner) in full, so I can’t comment on how the style of The Fall of Troy would evolve over time. But at the very least, this is a very solid starting point for what would become a surprisingly long-lasting act.

[whereistheonepiece]

So @lesbian-space-ranger​ and I accidentally created a new Zosan AU that we’ve been talking about since last night. A note: half of this is me summarizing, half of it is pulled directly from Discord because Cas (lesbian-space-ranger) has such great ideas.

This is a long post. I don’t feel like putting it under a read more. So. Enjoy. Or keep scrolling. Either works.

So this post happened

These roles just came to me. Didn’t need to give it much thought because Sanji has the appearance and demeanor of a lead singer and I like the idea of him using his skilled hands to play piano at the same time.

I also watched the movie Rocketman earlier in the week. You know, that Elton John biopic. I adored it and it’s been heavy on my mind lately and I liked the idea of Sanji giving a high energy performance from the piano. (Sir Elton John’s music comes into play later.)

And as for Zoro, I find the bass and/or the beat the sexiest part of the music in a song and, naturally, I can see him rocking at either.

So I asked Cas if she had any other headcanons for this AU and this thing is too good to not share.

Yeah, so Zoro and Sanji are in a boy band with Usopp and Luffy. Luffy started the band. Luffy does guitar, Zoro is on bass, Usopp is on drums, and Sanji is on keyboard and vocals.

Nami is their manager. She works them hard and has taken a 40% cut of the profits because of the guys’ naivete and inexperience. But she’s why they took off. She booked their gigs at every venue she could manage, no matter how small.

They got their big break when Nami met Vivi, who’s a talent scout for the record label Baroque Works. Nami insisted that Vivi had to see the boys perform because they’re something else and Vivi’s heard that a thousand times, but she agreed because Nami is cute. Nami and Vivi are dating. Also, re Baroque Works: Crocodile looks like a sleazy music producer, doesn’t he? So does Doflamingo.

So Sanji is the pretty one, Luffy is the funny one, Zoro is the quiet/broody one, and Usopp is the smart one.

Zoro has a lot of deals with fitness brands, but secretly finds the famous life unfulfilling. This comes back later, so keep that in your back pocket.

Robin runs their social media. She’s so good at her job, running all of their accounts and tweeting simultaneously, you’d swear she had four sets of hands. Wink.

Franky does pyrotechnics/lighting.

Brook is their stylist.

Chopper was their first real fan. He and Zoro grew up in the same neighborhood and Chopper just always idolized him. He followed them before anyone knew their names. He was their hype man, saying encouraging things like "I know you guys are gonna be great!" He believed in them even when they didn't believe in themselves.

Usopp set up their recordings before they got signed because he’s savvy. And then Chopper would sell their crappy CDs. At these tiny gigs. Like coffeehouses and stuff.

Sanji can play keyboard because his parents forced him to play piano as a kid. They had this idea that classical music would teach him discipline and make him smarter. This is how he meets Zeff. Zeff’s your typical stern instructor, but he’s the first adult to ask Sanji what he actually wants and likes. Zeff sees Sanji’s not into it so he asks him what music he likes and Sanji tells him he likes pop, so Zeff gives Sanji a more rounded education. This includes Elton John because I say so. It did inspire me to put Sanji on keyboard, after all.

But other than being Sanji’s piano instructor, Zeff becomes the one positive adult figure in young Sanji’s life and he becomes something of a mentor figure for him. Zeff has a garden and he lets Sanji work in it with him. This garden is how Sanji gets his “little eggplant” nickname. Sanji pulls an eggplant out before it’s ready and it’s so small and pitiful and Zeff won’t let him live it down. Like, Sanji keeps in touch with Zeff even into adulthood and after he makes it big and he still calls Sanji little eggplant.

Zoro and Sanji are always doing that, "Kind of flirting, not really” thing on stage.  Sanji is always like walking up to Zoro on stage and acting like he's going to kiss him but pushing him away at the last moment. And it's this huge mystery whether they're actually an item or not. This comes from Nami. Sanji and Zoro have this natural chemistry with each other that leads to speculation and Nami, knowing how boy band fan bases work, saw dollar signs. But it’s not just pragmatism on her part; she knows that one cannot simply go up to Zoro and Sanji and say “You obviously like each other. You should date.” So she makes money and helps her friends find happiness.

Usopp has speculation going on as well. People are always confused as to who he’s dating. Tabloids keep being like "Usopp dumped Nami and is now dating Luffy!" "Luffy Scorned?" "Luffy ditches Usopp and steals his girl!" And they just think the entire thing is hilarious. They collect headlines. The answer is Usopp is dating Luffy and Nami and Luffy and Nami just become really affectionate with each other after dating Usopp long enough. Also Nami is dating Vivi, like I mentioned, and sometimes Nami brings her on as a plus one. 

Sanji and Zoro keep giving conflicting answers about their relationship status. Like they'll tell one person they hate each other and another person they're gonna get married someday. Sanji has to walk this fine line of being "in love" with all of his female fans and also "in love" with Zoro. Or not. Who knows? Like Sanji enjoys the attention but he really really plays shit up for his fangirls. This makes Sanji even more popular. Just picture pages upon pages of Sanji/Reader and “Zanji” fics on Wattpad. Nami is one smart lady. "I am the smartest, prettiest, most clever person alive."

Zosan getting together really is just a bunch of Fake Dating tropes. At first it really is just to get more press for the band. Nami schemes with Usopp and Robin to push them together. Robin's a social media genius and knows how to craft tweets and Instagram posts that fans will overanalyze. 

Meanwhile eventually Zoro and Sanji admit to each other they have actual feelings and one day Usopp finds Sanji sleeping in Zoro's bed, both of them completely tuckered out. But they don’t know Nami crafted this. They just come clean and hope she won't be mad and she's like, "Yes! Finally!" and they're like "What?" and she's like, "I've been waiting for you two to realize you have actual feelings. Did you really think I'd just use you for profit like that?" and they're both like "Yes" "Of course"

Zoro’s mad at her for meddling. Secretly he’s grateful, but he doesn’t want to give her the satisfaction and he’s yelling until Sanji grabs his hand and he just calms down.

And to bring Elton John back into the picture, just picture Sanji doing a cover of “Your Song” and uploading it online and thinking about Zoro. Naturally the comments are abuzz with people speculating that he’s singing about Zoro. And like. Onstage Sanji does his rendition and sends these small glances Zoro’s way, partially because he knows it’ll get the band a lot of attention, partially because that song is sweet and beautiful and it’s such a simple way to explain his feelings. (There is a reason why Moulin Rouge included it!!) I imagine this happens before they come clean to each other. Like, Zoro comes to him and is all “I keep thinking about that song you did...” And they go from there.

And eventually the band comes to its natural end. 

Usopp goes solo and flourishes, working as a songwriter and a producer. He wrote the band’s songs and he’s had a drum kit since he was, like, ten and he can make his own beats. He’s not the singing type (though he is good at it and could reach new heights if he came out of his shell), so he’s the kind of artist who makes the beat and then gets super famous pop singers to feature on his tracks. But he also writes songs for other singers and is so good at it and produces other artists’ tracks. I also like the idea that he’s taught himself to play multiple instruments, but he prefers the drums/percussion. He totally played percussion in school and was in marching band. I was in marching band for one year. I loathed every second of it, but I know he’d be phenomenal in drum corps.

Luffy isn’t much in music anymore, but he keeps himself busy. He’s something of an influencer, the kind of celebrity who gets paid to wear fashion brands’ clothing. He’s also Usopp’s trophy husband, living off the money he made off the band. Usopp grew wise to Nami’s antics and made sure he and Luffy would live comfortably for the rest of their lives, even if Usopp were to retire. Luffy also is secretly a Buzzfeed journalist because it’s fun for him to write these hit articles and people not know it’s him because he’s writing on this super bland pseudonym. 

And then there’s Zosan. They have a falling out after the band splits and go their separate ways.

Sanji quits being a professional singer because he’s tired of the prying into his personal life, but he still mentors and/or teaches. He has a string of girlfriends and finds no fulfillment in those relationships because the women are only interested in his celebrity.

And they aren’t Zoro.

Zoro tried branching off into commercials for fitness, but his heart wasn’t in it. He kind of takes up ranching on a whim and learns that he’s really good at it. He likes the physical labor, the quiet, being away from it all, nobody knowing his name. He doesn’t pursue anyone after Sanji because he feels like if it’s meant to be, someone will appear.

And Sanji does.

Sanji finds out where Zoro is through Luffy. So he makes his way to the ranch and finds Zoro and Sanji is all “Come back. I miss you.”

And there’s just a lot of soft Zosan content during Sanji’s visit. Sanji’s always been afraid of horses, but he’s not afraid when he’s with Zoro, and Zoro teaches him they can be gentle creatures, it’s just that you just have to respect them. (Ha. Get it?) Zoro takes Sanji on a ride and they go out and he takes him up the mountain and shows him how beautiful the view is. Sanji's watching the sunset and he's like, "Damn that's the prettiest thing I've ever seen." And Zoro is looking at Sanji and he says, "It sure is." And Sanji's like, "you're not... even looking." And Zoro's like, "No, I'm looking alright. Prettiest thing I've ever seen for sure."

More soft things like Zoro taking off his cowboy hat and putting it on Sanji. Them sitting by the fire, Zoro playing acoustic while Sanji sings. Whenever people see them they’ll ask them if they’re musicians and they share a knowing smile and say “Yeah. Something like that.”

And Zoro convinces Sanji to move out there with him. The others come to visit. Luffy and Chopper are obsessed with the cows and horses and the chickens. Luffy wants, like, eight pet chickens. Usopp is skeptical. Doesn’t believe Lu can look after a pet.

And it kind of ends there. It was us going back and forth, oftentimes out of chronological order, and so here I am putting it all together because it’s too good not to share. But it was a lot of fun.

[kanasmusings]

[Translation] Satsuki Aoi “Reincarnation” Drama Track 2

And here’s the final track for Aoi’s “Reincarnation” drama tracks~! I hope you all had fun because this was a very cute and fun drama track to translate~!  Oh! Also, for those who asked, I think Deea will be working on the 4th Season drama tracks for Kakeru, Koi, Hajime, and Haru XD I only worked on Arata and Aoi~ And probably Ikkun, too, when his gets released www 

After this is all infinit0 subs and cast interviews~! Please get ready to know Rei and Roa more afterwards  ヽ(o＾▽＾o)ノ

※ Please don’t re-post the English translations without permission. Please just like/reblog them instead ^^

Oh! And if you can, please do consider buying the CD here to support the artists ^^

Under the cut, enjoy~! 

Track 02: [たった一人の兄として] “As your one and only older brother.”

  [0:00]

  ARATA/AOI: Hm…

ARATA: Looking at it on the tablet’s big screen…

AOI: It is, without a doubt…

ARATA/AOI: It’s Chi-chan…

ARATA/AOI: (sighs)

(Arata puts the tablet down)

ARATA: Alright, Aoi-kun. Let’s think about this positively.

ARATA: We’ve already accepted the situation.

ARATA: This time, we can deduce several things about it.

AOI: Meaning?

ARATA: First is this: The amount of uproar based on the truth that it���s just a misunderstanding of the picture in question will increase on the timeline.

AOI: Uh… I’m not too keen on having his profile exposed but… I also get where you’re coming from…

ARATA: Number two.

ARATA: That suspicion on “Satsuki Aoi’s Heart-Throbbing (Star Mark) Late Night Shopping District Date” has already been disputed by the agency itself.

ARATA: Everything’s leading to the truth and gradually, evidence will prove that we’re not lying.

AOI: I can only sense evil since you’re trying to make this into a full-blown case but… You’re right.

ARATA: Number three.

ARATA: Spring… has arrived for Chi-chan.

(Aoi buries his face on a pillow)

AOI: (muffled) That’s exactly it!!

AOI: (muffled) It’s a normal thing but I don’t know why I’m so shocked…!

AOI: (muffled) And you’re alright with this, Arata?!

ARATA: I’m actually not. I’m in extreme shock. I have proof, look.

ARATA: My eyes are so wide open.

AOI: Eh…? S-sorry, it’s hard to tell. In any case, you’re shocked, too, aren’t you…?

ARATA: Yeah.

ARATA: (sighs and then plops down on his seat)

ARATA: Thinking about it calmly… He’s been so cool for as long as I remember…

ARATA: He’s smart. He’s got a good personality…

ARATA: It’d be weirder if he didn’t have a girlfriend. I know that…

ARATA: But I’m still so shocked.

AOI: Yeah, that’s true…

AOI: I know I should probably congratulate him but I don’t know why I’m so shocked…

ARATA: This is, you know?

ARATA: It doesn’t sit well because Chi-chan doesn’t seem to be into that kind of thing.

ARATA: The impact of the “late night date” article being posted without notice is too huge.

AOI: Eh? Back in middle school and high school, I feel like I saw him with people who looked like they could be his girlfriend…

ARATA: (takes a deep breath) Really…?

AOI: Yeah… They were walking together and they were holding hands and stuff… I think that they were probably his girlfriend…?

AOI: But, that time it wasn’t really much of a shock to me…

AOI: I was only thrilled for him…

ARATA: By the way, right now, I’m really…

ARATA: I’m really a lot more shocked now.

AOI: Ah, I’m sorry somehow.

ARATA: (exasperated) Ah, forget it… For now, let’s just say I’m super shocked.

ARATA: I’m so shocked…

ARATA: Chi-chan is someone I admire, too. Though, in a different way from Hajime-san.

ARATA: And that Chi-chan is…

ARATA: Going on a “Heart Throbbing… Star Mark… Late night shopping district date…”

ARATA: Ahhhh!!!

AOI: Seeing a different side to Arata like this makes me feel kinda calmer…

ARATA: You traitor!!

AOI: In any case, sitting around here will do nothing. I’ll go call Nii-san and confirm.

ARATA: Confirm what?

ARATA: Like, the name of his girlfriend? Where they first met? (whining) I don’t want that!!

ARATA: I don’t wanna hear it. What are you gonna do if he talks of her sweetly?!

ARATA: I’ll be too shocked… I probably won’t be able to drink strawberry milk for a while, y’know?

AOI: At least, your sugar level will go down.

AOI: Alright…! I’ll go call him right away.

ARATA: Aoi-kun’s manliness is too much once he’s recovered!

AOI: (starts dialing)

(phone starts ringing)

AOI: Chi-cha—Nii-san? Um…

<——————————————————————————————————->

[04:40]

 RECEPTIONIST: Welcome! Are you here on a reservation?

AOI: We’re a group of three reserved under Tsukishiro’s name but…

RECEPTIONIST: Ah, of course! Tsukishiro-sama, was it? I just received word about it.

RECEPTIONIST: The other one is… It looks like he’s still not here, I presume?

RECEPTIONIST: Please let me introduce you two inside first.

AOI: Yes.

ARATA: Chi-chan’s not here yet?

AOI: Looks like it.

RECEPTIONIST: Welcome. Please let me handle your coats. Go ahead inside, please.

RECEPTIONIST: (to the staff inside) Reservation number 5 has arrived!

  (Arata and Aoi are walking inside)

ARATA: By the way, why was it under Tsukishiro-san’s name?

AOI: Because I asked him to make a reservation for us.

AOI: The net’s still in an uproar and I just that telling him about it before going to a bar would be a good idea.

AOI: The reservation just kinda happened while we were talking about it.

ARATA: I see. As expected from our capable manager, Tsukishiro-san.

ARATA: If it’s a shop he chose then, I’d feel safe in it.

AOI: That’s why.

RECEPTIONIST: Ah, no need to take your shoes off. It’s over here.

(The receptionist introduces them to a private room)

RECEPTIONIST: Now then, please enjoy your stay.

(The receptionist closes the sliding door behind him)

  <——————————————————————————————————->

[06:10]

  ARATA/AOI: (sighs)

ARATA: Oh yeah. Your “late night date” has stopped being the talk of the town, huh?

AOI: Why do you sound a bit disappointed? (wry laugh)

AOI: I’m glad that it died down before it turned into a bigger scandal.

ARATA: Kakerun and Yoru-Yoru uploaded a pic of you guys on that certain night so, it looks like that cleared the misunderstanding, huh?

AOI: Yup. What I was wearing and my hairstyle were completely different, too.

ARATA: Won’t it have been faster if you just uploaded a picture yourself?

AOI: I’m ashamed to say that I didn’t take pictures myself…

ARATA: Oh my, my~

AOI: (sighs)

AOI: I feel like I’m gonna be nervous about tweeting for a while.

ARATA: Don’t mind it. It’ll fall out of topic soon enough.

ARATA: That’s how rumors go.

AOI: Yeah…

AOI: SNS is fun and convenient but… It’s a bit scary, huh?

AOI: Things you didn’t even know about yourself end up being a big topic and rumors suddenly surface like what happened the other day…

ARATA: Just one mistake or one wrong impression can send comments flooding, huh.

AOI: Yeah.

AOI: I don’t know if it’s good or bad but, the rate at how fast information spreads is getting too fast, I think.

ARATA: People all over the world are connected in one click so, rumors, topics, and even comments can happen in a flash.

AOI: That sort of speed makes me feel dizzy sometimes…

ARATA: You don’t have to force yourself to catch up to it, you know? Why not just use it at your own pace?

AOI: You’re right. I know that but… It’s just, I can’t seem to…

AOI: But, you’re good at using the net in your daily life, aren’t you?

AOI: I’m so jealous.

AOI: I mean, even when I tweet normal stuff, I worry about whether I made a typo or any mistake.

AOI: Or stuff like, “is this going to be misunderstood?”

AOI: I get nervous pressing the “tweet” button every time.

ARATA: Even when just saying “Good morning?”

AOI: Even so.

ARATA: Isn’t that tiring?

AOI: I won’t call it tiring but, I’m aware that it is an irrational fear.

AOI: I want to try doing it like you, you know? With a carefree and sort of just doing it when you feel like it attitude…

ARATA: That’s how light my tweets feel…?

AOI: (chuckles) Ah, of course, not the content itself. It’s more of how you feel when you send one out.

AOI: In my case, I keep getting nervous even just thinking about what to write.

AOI: I guess I… I keep thinking about whether the people who read it will think it’s interesting… or something…?

ARATA: Aoi-kun, I think that you’re overthinking it a bit too much.

AOI: I think so, too.

ARATA:  I’ll say this again. You don’t have to think about it too much.

ARATA: There are a lot of simple things out there to say. Like, “good morning~” “good night” or even “I ate something delicious~” you know?

ARATA: Just take it easy and tweet short stuff.

AOI: Take it easy…?

ARATA: Yeah, exactly. I mean, it’s just tweeting, you know?

ARATA: You’re not particularly writing an essay or something.

AOI: You have a point…

ARATA: Plus, if you keep worrying about what you say, doesn’t your serious side just show up more?

ARATA: Then, it’ll be okay. The fans already know that about you anyway.

ARATA: I think they’d be happy just to get a glimpse of what the Prince’s daily life is like.

ARATA: You don’t have to force yourself to do it. You can run away from time to time if you find it hard to use, you know?

AOI: Yeah… Yeah. You’re right. It’s exactly as you say.

AOI: I don’t have to think too much about something good to say and um… I’ll try to use it to just greet people.

AOI: If it’s just a greeting then, I think I can do it without overthinking anything.

ARATA: Ah, greetings sound nice.

ARATA: A “good morning” for the world~ A “good afternoon” for the world.

ARATA: I feel like that’s the best way to use it, too.

AOI: So… After this is our very private “fight” that we absolutely cannot upload online…

ARATA: Ahhhh…!! (whines)

ARATA: My heart’s not ready yet.

AOI: (laughs) And here you are, acting all cool a while ago~

AOI: I wonder why you suddenly turn lame when we’re talking about Nii-san.

ARATA: I mean, you know…? I feel like I want to know about Chi-chan’s love life… but at the same time, I feel like I don’t wanna…

ARATA: I really wanna know…

AOI: Which is it, really? Ah, but, I feel like I understand how you feel…

RECEPTIONIST: (from beyond the door) Please excuse me.

(the receptionist opens the door)

RECEPTIONIST: Your other companion has arrived.

ARATA: He’s here…!

CHIHIRO: Yo, Aoi, Arata.

CHIHIRO: Long time no see.

  <——————————————————————————————————->

[11:36]

 CHIHIRO: And so, the person, no—The people I was seen with in the picture are—

ARATA: Was surprisingly my sister, Uduki Yuuka…  

CHIHIRO: Exactly. And the person here whose head was slightly pictured is Tanaka-san from across the street.

CHIHIRO: This guy whose shoulder was the only part shown is Old Man Shibata. He’s—

AOI: Ah, the people here are not passers-by but, all participants of a drinking party…?

CHIHIRO: Yeah.

ARATA: Then, all the people here were in a neighbourhood mah-jong tournament?

CHIHIRO: Exactly. Yuuka-chan tried to hunt for new mah-jong participants in her company, too.

CHIHIRO: But, they all said that they only knew how to play mah-jong on the computer.

CHIHIRO: That’s how the neighbourhood people who had experience were pulled into it.

AOI: And you were called for it, too?

CHIHIRO: Yeah, I was caught. (smiles) I got dragged into it.

AOI: I didn’t know you played mah-jong, Nii-san…

CHIHIRO: Even so, I only know a little. I only accompanied my mah-jong playing friends back in high school.

CHIHIRO: But, I’m bad at it and I’m pretty weak.

CHIHIRO: I was even worse than Yuuka-chan who only started playing today.

CHIHIRO: I was so weak that they gave me the nickname “Kamonegi”… (1)

AOI: Kamonegi…? That’s cute.

ARATA: Guess I’ll ask since we’re all here.

ARATA: Chi-chan, do you have anyone you’d go on a late night date with?

CHIHIRO: You mean a girlfriend?

CHIHIRO: Unfortunately, I don’t have any.

CHIHIRO: Right now, I’m enjoying vet school and I’m pretty busy so, I’ve got my hands full.

AOI: I see…

AOI: So everything from the beginning up until now were all misunderstandings, huh…

ARATA: What’s with this exhausting feeling?

ARATA/AOI: (sighs)

<——————————————————————————————————->

[13:50]

  AOI: Arata…

AOI: I’m equally guilty because I didn’t notice, too, but…

AOI: It’s your own sister so at least recognize what she looks like from behind, please…

ARATA: Sis changes her hairstyle a lot so I can’t tell.

ARATA: Even though I can tell if I see her up front.

AOI: Well, even I can do that.

AOI: U-um… You two… I’m sorry.

AOI: I don’t really use SNS much so I didn’t know how much of a big deal it was.

CHIHIRO: Aoi, are you okay? Did you get in trouble with the agency? Maybe I should go and tell them—

AOI: Ah, no, that’s okay. They figured out it was a misunderstanding quickly, too.

CHIHIRO: I see. Then, that’s great.

ARATA: Aoi’s panic when we first found out was quite something though.

AOI: Arata!

CHIHIRO: (chuckles)

AOI: Nii-san?

CHIHIRO: It might sound imprudent of me but, it’s rare for me to meet you two in a place outside our hometown.

CHIHIRO: I was just thinking about how happy I am.

ARATA: You’re right.

CHIHIRO: To think that I’d get to meet my younger brothers who used to wear kindergarten hats and played with mud in a bar like this~

CHIHIRO: Even though I see you often on TV, on the net, or on articles.

CHIHIRO: It would be nice if we could create an atmosphere like this where we can talk with each other directly again once in a while, huh?

AOI: Eh?

CHIHIRO: I hear a lot about you from here and there but, like what happened the other day, there are bound to be some misunderstandings.

CHIHIRO: But, there’s no warmth in something like that, right?

CHIHIRO: Being able to meet you, feel your warmth, and talk to you directly is without a doubt so much better, is what I was thinking.

(Chihiro pats Arata and Aoi’s heads)

CHIHIRO: (smiles) Are you feeling happy? Are you doing your best? Are you feeling tired?

CHIHIRO: I’m your stupidly over-concerned brother so I wish that you’d meet me sometimes and make me feel at ease.

ARATA/AOI: Chi-chan…

CHIHIRO: Aoi, and you as well, Arata. You’re always doing your best, aren’t you?

CHIHIRO: You look cool and sparkling and I’m so proud of you both.

CHIHIRO: As a fan and as your one and only older brother.

CHIHIRO: I’m always going to be cheering you on, okay?

AOI: Yeah.

ARATA: Thank you, Chi-chan.

CHIHIRO: Ah~ Tell me all about your relationships directly before they turn into a scandal, too, okay?

AOI: Chi-chan!

ARATA: (laughs)

 ==END==

<——————————————————————————————————->  

Translator’s Notes:

(1) “鴨葱/Kamonegi” is Japanese slang for someone who came to play/gamble but they’re so weak/clueless about the game that it’s like they basically came just to “say goodbye to his money” XD

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying me a ko-fi here to support my work if you want. (o^▽^o)Thank you!!

[jaxcynsfanland]

Uploading some old art because I need to organize my stuff in a way that makes sense to my current frame of mind. Just decided to put these two pages together in one post because I don’t see a point in uploading them individually? :|

MORE INFORMATION: Concerning Muses: https://www.deviantart.com/kokusfanland/journal/CONCERNING-MUSES-762318931

PAGE ONE This feels remarkably plain compared to other works, yes? Perhaps it's because I got really lazy in the backgrounds.

Also, as I am "a licentious, degenerate, little strumpet of a heathen" and do not know many prayers, much less anything that would be wholly Ishvallan, Scar's opening prayer was an old Irish prayer, I think. When in doubt about anything, I tend to reference how the Irish do things seeing as I myself am in fact Irish.

PAGE TWO Scar talks a lot of smack but that's about all he does. He's non-violent. And that's why this little story ends here. There might've been more to it if there was violence, but there wasn't and so there isn't.

At least, until Andrya and I come up with some new ways of pissing my Scar Muse off.

I seem to have gotten back my awesome backgrounds abilities; woo-WOOT! Or maybe it's just that Nikkie was in this comic; maybe she's magical and makes them pretty by being there. HMMMMMMM.....I must conduct long tedious research on this.

Also, Bex will not be re-appearing in many to-come comics, if she appears again at all. I'm still arguing with myself over that. Pretty much the only reason she's in this comic is because I don't feel it's right to completely deny the fact that yes, we were technically friends at one point, and also cuz she had the GayDar from Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series, which I can sorta-kinda-maybe-no-not-really draw. She was to show in...three more comics, I think, but by the time I started trying to take this more seriously the two of us had a falling out and we're not friends anymore. A few of those comics were about that fallout, but it's not like they're imperative to an arch or anything and cutting them entirely from the series won't impact anything, which is why I'm leaning heavily toward not releasing them at all. I don't want much hassle and the less I have to deal with Bex right now the better. Not trying to say she's a bad person or anything, in fact I still admire her somewhat, but since the falling out I have had no more desire to patch things up or be her friend anymore.

Questions? Comments? Derogatory remarks? Leave a message after the beep below.

Scar belongs to Hiromu Arakawa and is a product of her series titled FullMetal Alchemist. Andrya belongs to https://www.deviantart.com/astrangerinparadiseNikkie belongs to https://www.deviantart.com/mythousandwords Bex belongs to https://www.deviantart.com/kingyobachi212 Stories are based off my mental representations of the characters. I make no money off this; it is purly for my own enjoyment and, hopefully, to your aMUSEment. (:

[ginnyzero]

Completely Harmless Ch. 28

Completely Harmless An SSO SilverGlade Re-imagining Story (Or Fix it Fan Salt fic) By Ginny O.

When Lily and her friends wanted to buy horses and were directed to the Silverglade Manor and its myriad of problems, they didn’t expect to start a revolution. They were just a bunch a stable girls. Completely harmless. Right?

A/N: Things are only canon if I say they’re canon. Pre-Saving the Moorland Stables compliant for the most part. Posted in its entirety on my website. Posted in 2000 to 4000 word bits here. Rated T for Swearing Word Count 177,577

Chapter Twenty-Eight Planning Rainbow Week Pt. 3

Ginny sighed. “I feel like I’ve monopolized this meeting.”

“You haven’t,” Pauline reassured her.

“Well, you know most of what we’re doing already then, the ride through the Mirror Marsh. Syntax is playing in the town square. We’re using a heart that’s made of holding hands for our charm to represent how we’re working together to save our stable. I wouldn’t trust Jamie Olivetree to cook or bake anything. So, I’m a bit at a loss for that. But I had an idea for a craft. We can do rainbow window decorations. They look like stain glass, but it’s all plastic and markers and glue mixed with paint. Or they can make the kite paper ones, which is kite paper, cardboard and glue, easy peasy.”

“Those sound great.”

“We can choose some other shapes, but really great for the younger members.” Ginny grinned.

“Right,” Lily nodded. “We need to cater to them too other than making them hyped up on sugar.”

“Oh god, do we have so much sugar on this list,” Pauline groaned. “Ladies, we better string this out.”

There was more laughter.

“Okay, so, bear with me,” One of the girls said. “Since you don’t trust Jaime to bake. I went to this other summer camp last year, and it was a sleep away camp where you took different skill classes and had dinner in the dining hall.”

“Why can’t we do that here?” One of the girls asked.

“But they had this one dessert that was essentially rainbow marshmallows and chocolate. They took the marshmallows, mixed them with chocolate that wasn’t hot enough to melt them, and then shaped it in like a yule log or put it into aluminum foil boxes with parchment paper and added more chocolate until it was full. Then they cut them into slices. They called them stainglass windows. So, not only do you have something that goes with your craft, you don’t have to have Jaime do anything.”

Ginny groaned. “I could kiss you. Yes. We’ll take it.”

“Okay, that leave us, I guess,” Kelsey said. “We’re using the Celtic Infinity Knot for our symbol.”

“Mr. Wetton has found you a Celtic Group.”

“We’ll have them perform out by the spooky big tree,” Kelsey said. “Now, Madison had an idea, and it’s a good one to run with the Welshies as part of our event.”

“Well, that’s really cool, actually.” Penny said.

“And, we have a huge beach thing, it goes from the Hermit’s house, all the way over to the other side of the Peninsula that goes up near the tree.” Kelsey rubbed her forehead. “So, we thought, a race? We can make it a group race like the Jorvik Stable’s race.”

They all nodded.

“That’s fair,” Josefina said.

“We should have more than one group race,” Pauline made a note of it.

“And we’re doing these rainbow swirl cookies that look like lollipops, rainbow cotton candy, rainbow churros, and rainbow shaved ice with ice cream in the middle.”

Madison is taking this seriously,” Cathy said, her voice very dry.

“Of course she is,” Ingrid said with a smile. “She’s young.”

“We haven’t talked anyone into the Highland Cattle yet. But I think we’re getting there.” Kelsey said. “Not that anyone is really going to listen to us until something horrible happens. I mean, we helped them with their shipwreck but that got us trust and a spot on the peninsula, nothing more.”

“Craft,” Cathy glowered at her.

“Oh right, the craft.”

“We’re going to have Seashells you can paint,” Cathy said. “It’s been keeping everyone busy and with us on the beach, Mr. Anwir refuses to come close.”

“So, we’re going to have sharpies and rubbing alcohol for the kids, some puffy paint for the intermediate painters, and alcohol inks for the experts.” Kelsey grinned. “They can turn them into necklaces, bracelets, earrings, headbands, whatever makes them happy.”

Cathy jumped in. “Hugh is happy to have people come and give tours of the Rescue Ranch.”

“Oh thank goodness, we don’t want to bother him too much.”

“He thinks it’s great publicity.”

Pauline shifted in her chair. “Okay, I have one last idea. I know it’s not Happy Horse Week but it will be a taste of it.”

Lily raised a brow at her.

“Every one of us has a paddock. New Hillcrest can borrow the Dew Farm in Epona’s if necessary,” Pauline said. “I think we should have a special event in the paddocks specifically for the horses, and only the horses of our stables. It can be a show jumping event or a dressage event or a show type of event where they jog their horses around to show them off.”

“Oh, Pony flag race!” Polly piped up. “I’ve been wanting to do one of those and with the bunting for the day this would be perfect. Have seven flags in each color and they have to go and get them and come back one at a time.”

“Tedious but give enough experience or one of Lowe’s exchanges, they’ll do it.”

“Or lots of experience and an exchange item,” Amelia said. “This is a good idea. I like it, oui.”

Loretta grimaced at her phone. “What is taking them so long?”

“What is taking us so long?” Pauline rubbed her forehead and checked her notes.

Lily texted Regina. “Ohkay, they’re arguing in the store. Just send us some options. Yeesh.”

Phones buzzed as Regina threw them all into a group chat and uploaded pictures.

“Okay those half circle buntings we need for the races.”

“Same for the triangle ones that are the stripes, not the solids. We’ve got solids already,” Kate said.

“We should have the solid ones for the pony race,” Penny added as she texted that into the chat.

“All right, I’m seeing 2 foil balloons here.”

“Why not make the fuzzy ombre ones for the parade route and Moorland’s festival space, they’ll go with the bows and the ombre sequin bunting swags there,” Pia said. “And then the hard stripe ones for everywhere else.”

“You’re the only one who has seen these bows.” Lily reminded her.

Pia dug into her phone and uploaded a picture into the group chat.

“Ah, yes, agreed,” Pauline said as she added it to the list. “The arches need something more than ivy.”

“Streamers, these ones here have some great circle paillettes with them, tres chic,” Josefina double tapped it. “Mix it in with the ivy, it won’t be as noticeable or bright.”

“And might make the inside more of a rainbow as the sun goes through it.”

“I hope we don’t have rain,” one of the girls groaned.

“Oh, we can use the clouds with the dangling rainbow hearts to hang from the trees,” Ami brightened. “That would be pretty. They’re plastic, so reusable even if it does rain.”

“And the heart shaped garland for the stable fronts, and inside too.”

Josefina shuddered. “This could get so tacky very quickly.”

“Okay, then what about those big hearts in the solid colors that are studded with pearls? I think those are pearls.”

“They can go on building doors and along fences.”

They nixed some of the other options including a long fabric rainbow bunting and hearts that were rainbow from the inside out. They were hard on the eyes.

“And, that’s, that’s actually kind of nice,” Loretta said grudgingly of the backdrop. They’d done it up in Bobcat colors with a light pink curtains right behind a white circle that had yellow roses on the upper right and pink heart shaped crystal beads draped across it. To either side of the light pink curtains were darker more Bobcat pink curtains.

In the chat, someone use a confetti trumpet emoji. There were hearts and happy faces.

Lastly, they sent a display of cloud lanterns they could put inside the stables and covered areas. They had LED Lights hanging down. They could get them in rainbow colors. Or one of the girl’s noted, they could do the hearts like the smaller plastic clouds they thought would be good in the trees.

“Okay, I know everyone has a big cache of the LED lanterns with the heart cut outs, so might as well use them.”

“No candles.”

“Not unless they’re LED candles.”

They all looked at each other. “Yeah, no,” one said.

“We need a piñata,” someone murmured.

“Where? Fort Pinta?”

“If Madison finds out,” Kelsey warned.

“Let’s do a bunch in Fort Pinta for the kids there, we have to vary this up!”

“Between Mr. Peanut posing for photos, Isebell Figg doing street magic, and Pinatas it will be something of a carnival.” Pia said with a smile.

“Which is exactly what Madison wants,” Kelsey groaned. She rubbed her face.

They all looked at each other and shrugged.

“Jugglers, fire eaters.”

“Yeah, we’re getting into circus stuff now,” Lily said.

“Don’t tell Ydris,” someone muttered.

“Don’t tell Madison about Ydris. He’d turn her into a monkey in a tutu so fast,” Lily said.

They all giggled at that image.

Loretta and Tan swallowed hard. The other girls didn’t actually mean to dig, but they felt it like a dig at them.

“I don’t think that would be good around the horses anyways, fire eaters and jugglers.”

“Definitely not.”

“You have a huge moor to take up,” Lily said with a shrug.

Kelsey shook her head. “I think we’ve bitten off enough.”

Pauline shoved the list over to Lily. It’d been written across a map of the area.

“I agree,” Lily said after she read it over. “Okay, honestly, this calls for celebratory food.”

“I’ll go order some pizza.”

“You know, Courtney doesn’t make half bad chicken wings and those double baked potatoes.”

“Just,” Lily pushed it away and put her head in her arms.

“Ice cream,” Pauline patted her head. “Definitely ice cream.”

A couple of them laughed and ran out to order food. When the phones buzzed, the rest left leaving Loretta and Lily alone.

Loretta fidgeted. “How long are you going to treat me with so much disrespect?”

Lily looked up and straightened. Her brows rose noticing everyone else was missing, including Tan. “The thing about respect. You have to earn it.”

Loretta pursed her lips.

“You and your girls treated us like dirt and expected us to do all the hard labor.”

“You were trying out for the Club. It’s expected.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “Loretta, everything around you is for beginners. It’s not that difficult. You didn’t treat us with respect. So, we left. If you want to be friends, be friendly.”

Loretta wasn’t the type to slump in her seat.

“You going to treat Jojo Siwa like the rest of us or am I going to have to assign an ambassador?”

“No. She’s somebody.”

Lily leaned back and stared at the ceiling. “Oh, where do I start with that one?”

Loretta huffed. “You’re all nobody.”

“You don’t know that,” Lily dropped her chin back down to meet Loretta’s eyes. “You have no idea who anyone of us could be. We could be as rich as Anne Von… whatever her name is or royalty or anything because we don’t tell you.”

Loretta scoffed. “If any of you were rich and famous, I’d know.”

“There are a lot of rich people who aren’t famous and don’t want to be,” Lilly rubbed the back of her neck. “Treating everyone the same is really, the only way to go about it. You can’t make snap judgement, especially when Thomas is handing everyone the same uniform the first day.”

Loretta rolled her eyes.

“To us, you’re nobody,” Lily said bluntly. “The mean girl with the crush on her employer’s son.”

Loretta stiffened and glared at her.

Lily shrugged a shoulder. “Calling it like I see it, Lori.”

“I was here first.”

“And you’re a backwater club, at a backwater summer camp, where you can lord your superior riding skills over campers with none at all,” Lily raised her brows. “I don’t think anyone else would put up with you and your airs.”

Loretta tensed.

The door opened and the others came back with food.

Lily didn’t know what it was going to take to get through to the other girl. They just needed this Rainbow Week to go well and for Loretta to try not and take all the credit.

--

There were piles and piles of boxes in the courtyard of the Silverglade Equestrian Center. “The Siwanators bogged us down with tons of bows. They’ve been busy. Like a two person assembly line,” Regina said. “Productive meeting?”

Lily sat on the boxes. “Outside of Loretta, yeah.”

“What did she do now?”

“She wants respect.” Lily shrugged.

Linn jogged over. She leaned over putting her hands on her knees. “So, the Baroness wants to see us at the Riding Arena.”

Lily met Regina’s eyes. “No more long meetings.”

They mounted their horses and trotted down to the Riding Arena. Baroness Silverglade stood out of the way in the show jumping side of the arena. The slightest twist of her lips could convey a multitude of emotions.

Right now they were slightly turned downward. Slightly pursed. The Baroness wasn’t pleased.

Lily approached with caution. “Baroness Silverglade,” she said.

“Tell me, Lily, will this do for the fine upstanding reputation of the Silverglade family?” She gestured at the arena.

Lily glanced around at the showjumping arena. “Not when we have distinguished visitors coming,” she said it quite carefully.

The Baroness met her eyes and walked serenely out of the Arena.

Lily braced her elbow on one hand and cupped her face. Her lips pressed together and she restrained several screams by making exaggerated faces.

“Well,” Regina said. “Well.”

Lily spun on her toe and marched to the other side of the Arena. While, the huge space didn’t have jumps set up in it, it was being used by a group of dressage riders as they practiced their formations.

Lily worked her jaw licking her lips, her mouth opening and shutting.

“I see an underutilized space,” Regina said.

“We need a schedule,” Pauline said.

Lily gestured at her. It was a clear ‘get it done’ type of hand wave.

Regina put her arm around Lily. “Okay, I think you need a break. You’re taking far too much responsibility on yourself.”

“A nap,” Linn said. “Go ahead and take a nap, Lily. When you wake up, we’ll have a schedule arranged to get everything done before Rainbow Week.”

Lily looked between them and cracked. “Are you two sure?”

“Yes, we’re sure,” Pauline said. “All three of us. Delegation will get things done faster.”

Lily hugged each other mumbling thank yous. She jogged off and took the trailer back to the stable, even though it really wasn’t that far away.

Regina, Pauline, and Linn looked at each other.

“Let’s do this thing,” Pauline said firmly.

Linn pulled out her phone.

“We’re going to either have to kick everyone out, or clean at night,” Regina said looking around. “Wow, you just don’t think about how many people are wandering about all the time.”

“Linda thinks we should meet in the library,” Linn reported.

“This is one meeting right after another,” Pauline shook her head.

They rode through the gardens back up the main house marveling at the amount of work they’d actually gotten done. The manor was well on its way to being spectacular. The workman of the tunnel waved at them as they threaded through the trees to go up the road for a bit.

They put their horses in the stalls and gave Lily’s an extra pat or two as they passed.

Linda, Agnetha, and the rest of the club met them in the library.

Pauline sat at the head of the table and heaved a huge sigh. “Right. So, the Baroness has just shoved the refurbishment of the Riding Arena into our laps. We need a plan on how to tackle this so everything gets done in time for the Rainbow Festival.”

Linda adjusted her glasses. “Girls, we have done a prodigious amount of work over the last month in order to make this place remotely presentable. I can talk to the Baroness about putting off the Riding Arena until after the Rainbow Festival.”

“We have a week,” Regina said. “I think if we have a structured plan in place, break things up into groups like we did in the beginning, we can get everything done. It’s Lily is taking a lot of this personally.”

“She’s got all the emotional labor problems too,” Abigail leaned in propped her chin on her hands. “That’s as much work as physical labor.”

“And we’ve all been focusing on the garden since we’ve got contractors doing the work for the Ice Cream bar and the tunnel. Aaron and Anastasia are focused on getting people hired. So, maybe we gave a false impression of how much we can actually do in a set amount of time.” Pauline winced. “Which is on us.”

“Right. This is vacation and you’re working as hard as you would in school,” Linda protested. “You’re supposed to be here to have fun and meet everyone in the county and ride through the races to train your new horses.”

“Right, we have to make them worth 75,000 shillings somehow.” Regina said flippantly.

Agnetha frowned. “Linda’s correct. Annabella and I have been taking dreadful advantage of you girls.”

“We volunteered,” Pauline pointed out.

Brittany nodded. “Something weird is going on here in South New Jorvik County. We don’t know what it is, neglect, the G.E.D., Dark Core interference, whatever it is, but something fishy is going on here. I mean, is the place just poor or what?”

Linda grimaced. “I’m not really from around here either. Alex Cloudmill hails from Jorvik City, so she doesn’t know either.”

Agnetha shrugged. She didn’t know either.

“Well, let’s work on what we can control,” Regina said pushing the worries about G.E.D. and Dark Core aside to work with another day.

“We need to finish the Folly Gardens,” Pauline said.

“Set up the event Pavilion. Clean up and plant gardens around the Pavilion and the Riding Arena. Install Lighting, benches and urn features.”

“Install the last Duck Coop behind the Arena.”

“Clean the Arena. Replace the Jumps in the Show Jumping side.” Linn said. “They’re old and they don’t fit the theme anymore.”

“Clean the tunnel once the workers are finished.”

“Clean and install furniture in the Wine Cellar. Decorate the Wine Cellar.”

“Decorate for Rainbow Week,” Regina said.

“And that has to be enough for now,” Linda said.

“We should get some of those window sun catchers and decorations from Riley and Ginny for the Arena,” Pauline muttered.

“Since we have the only arena.”

“Oh, well,” Pauline’s eyes lit up. “Ginny and Susan are going to try and convince Mr. Kemball to build them an arena.”

They all stared at each other for a moment, huffed, and burst into giggles.

“Linda,” Linn started with a quiver to her voice, “Can we shut down the Riding Arena to fix it? We can put it off until the last two days if we must, since I’m sure we’re going to want a full day to decorate right before Rainbow Week begins.”

“I mean, this isn’t Christmas where we decorate two months in advance,” Stacy said offhandedly.

Linda smiled softly. “I’ll make a sign that it will be closed those days for cleaning and refurbishing.”

“Thank you!” Linn slumped.

“Okay,” Pauline said as she fiddled with the schedule. “We’ve got seven days or whatever. Tomorrow we can do a huge push to finish the last terrace. Day two, clean up the Pavilion and Riding Arena space, install lighting, benches, duck coop, and the urns. Day Three: Set up the Pavilion, plant the gardens. Day Four, Clean up the tunnel and do the Wine Cellar. Day Five, whatever isn’t done. Day Six, Riding Arena Clean Up and Refurbishment. Day Seven: Decorate.”

Linda nodded. “That sounds reasonable.”

“And you’ve got yourselves a slush day.”

“Then we take the week off to ride all around the county and have fun,” Regina said firmly.

“Get sick on cotton candy at South Hoof,” Pauline mused. “Do a treasure hunt in Cape West.” Pauline blinked. “Oh right,” she found a paper and slid it over to Linda. “Our schedule of events things to do if you want to put it up online.”

Linda brightened. “That will be great. We can have so many visitors. Get your friends to send me pictures for Jorvikgram. I’ll get this up on the website. You know, I don’t think there’s an actual county website for events.”

“Then there should be,” Stacy said.

“And if you build it, you need to get paid for it,” Regina added on.

“And by the good and fluffly lord, do not let Aaron moderate it,” Pauline rolled her eyes.

“Or Anastasia,” one of the girls said under her breath.

“Now,” Agnetha glared at them. “The rest of you go join Lily and get some rest. Everything will keep until tomorrow.”

“Don’t work you and Bjorn to death without us!” One of the girl’s admonished her.

Agnetha gave her a tiny smile.

It was weird, but somehow through working together, Agnetha had become like their prickly aunt.

Linda poked at her phone. She never noticed the rest of them leave.

FOR THE ACCOMPANYING IMAGES PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE MY WATERMARK AND CONTACT INFORMATION. THANK YOU. I get it. Some of you might get excited and want to see this stuff in the game, especially the clothes, tack, and pets. However, the only way I want to see this in the game is if I get paid for it. If I see it in the game and I’m not paid for it, there will be hell to pay. You think I’m salty. I’d be angry. Personally, I’m not going to send this info to SSO. If you do, leave my contact information there! Don’t give them any excuses to steal.

Now, I’ll know you haven’t read this note if you leave me comments about how ‘salty’ I am about the game and if I hate it so much I should do something else. I am doing something else. It’s called Mystic Riders MMORPG Project. Mystic Riders however is a very baby phase game. You can check out our plans on the game dev blog. (Skills, Factions, Professions, Crafting, Mini-Games, 25+ horse breeds!) If you know anyone who would be interested and has money or contacts about game making, direct them to the blog.

[thatlovelygal]

Long Post incoming

Let’s talk about what’s been going on with me lately, currently, and my future.

Lately: This weekend I went to a convention that I’ve been going to since it started. I had a good time it was three days and I cosplayed two out of the three days. Friday I was my regular self but this time with a wig, Saturday I wore the poodle skirt outfit from Fallout 76, an Sunday I was Lydia Deetz from the movie during the wedding scene. 

Friday there wasn’t much to do besides the concert, the band was really fucking cool and the drummer was pretty cute. I ended up getting one of their shirts after the show and it had a double bar cross which I thought was funny because I had never seen one in person before.

Saturday was a long day but ended up being alright. I was on the verge of a panic attack for most of the day, and then I saw my asshole of an ex walking around which made everything worse. He doesn’t even like nerdy stuff so why was he even there? I truly think he was there to bug me, he went to a panel I was guaranteed to be at (Fallout themed) and he wore the same fucking “costume” he wore when we went together. He looked like a fucking dumbass then and he looked like an even bigger one this year. I went and at a local restaurant and it was one of the highlights for the day because me and my mom went to it with two guys we met at the con (as friends) and my ex kept walking around the outside of the restaurant I really hope he saw and it ate him up inside.

Sunday was my favorite day, I was a lot less panicky and I saw a lot less of my ex. The cosplay guests loved my outfit and a few of them asked for my picture! I kept getting asked for my picture or to take pictures with people and I loved it. One of the funnier things to happen was my mom commenting on me responding to people addressing me as Lydia, which I’m used to people calling me the wrong name all the time so I respond to nearly any name, but I was dressed as Lydia so of course, I would respond. When I was getting stuff signed I would have to mention my actual name (which is a pretty famous pop-culture name and I hate it because I got so much shit for it over the years) so to clear up  confusion about my name I would say it then reference the pop-culture thing (if my name was Delilah I would have said something like: “Delilah yeah like Delialah from the Plain White Tees song”), when I was younger if you even referenced the thing I’m named after I would want to fight. At the end of the convention, I was sitting on some stairs waiting for my ride and a guy came up and started talking to me and my mom and asked for out social media because he thought we were cool and he wanted to make some friends, and of course, my ex walked by as I was handing the guy his phone back.

I cut my hair Sunday morning and now I have fucked up lopsided bangs but they worked for Lydia, I tried to dye my hair pink and purple Thursday but the blue in my hair wouldn’t strip all the way and majorly fucked up so I threw some brown over it and now I’m pretty fucking depressed I plan on bleaching it again in a few weeks and throwing the pink and purple in. I’ve been thinking about getting a perm so I can have curly hair but I’m not sure its a good idea with how processed my hair is.

Current:

I have a meeting with my counselor today and we’re going to talk a lot about college and I’m thinking about telling her about my interest in attending mortuary  school. I’ve always been fascinated with death, I think death care is extremely important, and it’s something that I’m passionate about. The morbid doesn’t bother me and I think I’d be more comfortable near corpses than I would be living humans (although I know I’d need to interact with them too). The only hitch is there are no mortuary schools near me (the closest one is over 2.5 hours away) and I’m very squeamish although when I occasionally look at g*re I don’t get squeamish it only really happens with fake stuff or when talking about it, or if it’s my own stuff. 

I need to email my teachers about putting them as refrences on an application to become a tutor and for a scholarship application, I also need to scan and upload my transcripts, as well as finish the essay. The scholarship application is due in 17 days (my birthday). 

Wednesday I have a student government meeting and I need to ask if we need to wear a costume for the fall festival because if so I’m going as Lydia. I also need to figure out how much money I need to scrounge up to donate for our foster kid. I also need to gather up cans for the food drive. I think I might crochet some hats for our winter clothes drive.

I recently got health insurance again so I need to call Tricare and find out if I have dental and if so schedule an appointment for a dentist and see if I can get braces and if my insurance will cover them. 

I reached out to two places of worship that I’m interested in attending and explained a bit of my situation and asked if they had any recommendations of books or other resources for me to learn more.

Upcoming: 

I have three mid-terms coming up and I’m worried about them. I’ve decided I want to start stripping at my “local” strip club so I need to bring that up to my mother so that she can help me pick out some outfits and shoes, as well as my grandmother so she can drive me until I can get my own car. 

If I strip I can pay for gas, save money, invest it, help the family out more, and pay for college and then maybe I could afford mortuary school. I’ve got a detailed plan for how I would handle the money that I would make stripping, it’s something I’ve really thought about. Although it’s funny because I want to dress more modestly (covered hair, no collar bones showing, no pants, long sleeves) and here I am dead set on becoming a stripper. 

I plan on reaching out to a local funeral home and asking what steps I should take if I want to join the death industry. Is mortuary school needed or are there other things I could do?

I plan on completely cleaning up my new bedroom next week and finally getting off of the couch where I have been for 8 months. I want to get some wallpaper and use it as wallpaper, get some fabric and make me some new curtains, and I would like to get all new bedclothes. I want my bedroom to be the thing of pastel dreams. 

This is way too long so I’ll go. I hope everyone is having a great day!