#I gotta try more of these roll cakes

[jananimal813]

Lars’ Ube Roll from Steven Universe via Babish

Had to tweak a few things, added some salt and vanilla

Also switched out the icing for a mascarpone whipped cream

So yummy 😋

[danwhobrowses]

So Callowmoores am I alone in thinking it was cute that Fearne helped carry Ashton to the city? Like there's the parallel also with Ashton carrying her into the Bloody Bridge as well

[seumyo]

KENJI SATO ✰ 10:43

“Working overtime really doesn’t suit you, Sato.” The teasing sentence made Kenji grunt in disapproval, slumping against his couch.

“Wow, I didn’t notice. Thank you for that valuable input, [Name],” he says, rolling his eyes at you. 

He can’t help the sarcastic reply. Kenji’s schedule was all over the place. His life has been all over the place ever since his return to his home country, Japan. And now he not only has to take care of himself—which, in his defense, was fairly simple when he just had to worry about himself—he has to worry about an infant Kaiju!

What a wonderful (not) icing on the cake.

“Ken is really appreciative that you made time to fulfill his request, or, shall I say, cry for help, [Name].” Mina’s familiar voice flurried from a distance, closing in to your right in a breeze. 

“Hey! It was not a cry for help—it’s more like a... Asking a friend for a favor,” Kenji says, trying to ease his brain with what’s coming out of his mouth (like it was on autopilot, scrambling to defend himself and the pride he had left).

“Uh huh. And the favor is? I don’t really think there’s anything I could do to her containment unit or any repairs that’re needed in this place.”

“I just need someone to watch over her.”

(“I just need someone to talk to” is a much fitting phrase.)

“Doesn’t Mina already do that?”

“There’s only so much a supercomputer like me can do to entertain a living being, [Name].”

On cue, Emi croons at the video of you singing on stage. A part time career of yours, because when you’re not developing new tech that boosts the economy, you might as well indulge in your hobbies. 

Kenji wouldn’t admit it, but he has a vinyl or two—or even a whole collection of them—that he considers as priceless as his one-of-a-kind sports car displayed in the basement.

“Would you look at that? She likes your singing.” 

He watches as you take a step closer to Emi, observing how she delightedly squealed at the soft melody being played on the holograms. This 20-foot-tall baby Kaiju reminded you of the time you took care of children at the daycare center.

“I just...” he sighs. You didn’t even notice that Kenji was already beside you, offering you a canned drink. 

“How do you do it? Juggle everything?” He murmurs. “You’re the busiest person I know. Working on your thesis, performing at various concerts, taking on charity work, and whatnot. Hell, if you could run for president, I’m sure I’ll be seeing you in the elections, too.”

A quiet laugh was returned. “It’s not easy, that’s for sure. But within time, you’ll learn just what you need and what you can handle.”

“Mm. Don’t you ever just want to run away from all the responsibilities people place on your shoulders? I can barely take care of this young lady,” he chuckles, though it doesn’t hold even the slightest ounce of humor to it.

“I wish, but then I’ll remember the kids who're so happy to see me whenever I drop by,” you say. “They may be a handful at times, but you’ll be surprised to know just how smart and caring they are. How they take in their surroundings and attempt to figure out who they are. We’re all what they have. The least we could do is give them our time and love all the same.”

Kenji lets your words sink in. Simple and touching. The kind that gets the gears in his head to start twisting.

“You really are a charm with your words; did you know that?”  

“Thanks; I try my best.”

The night continues with Kenji and Emi playing baseball on a simulated field with you by the shed, cheering on from a safe distance. Kenji doesn’t remember the last time he’s been this genuinely happy after his return to Japan. It’s a refreshing feeling that he wants to get used to again. To see the baby Kaiju successfully hit the ball with a swift swing after watching after him is a sight that tugs at one’s heartstrings.

Just like a proud father.

“Come on, girl! We gotta run the bases!”

And as the two celebrate their moment of triumph, the baby Kaiju stomps toward you and giggles happily as she hoists you in the air without much warning. You took it all in you not to shriek and absolutely lose all composure, but when you’re up in the air and are being held to a bear hug like some sort of teddy bear by a Kaiju that could probably crush your bones if not careful, it’s hard to not just scream for your life.

“Oh, ok—ok. Baby, put me down gently, please,” you chuckle nervously. 

“It appears that the little one sees you as her other mother,” Mina adds.

Kenji laughs at the sight, pulling out his phone to take a picture. This is definitely a memory he’d want to remember.

“This is not funny, Kenji. Tell her to put me down.”

“Aw, is Baby not listening to her Mommy?”

“Again, not funny. This is like an out-of-the-blue co-parenting a child with you. With you being my annoying ex-husband.”

“Specific, eh?”

“Shut!”

When you’re just about to leave for the night, Kenji suggests that you sleep over. There’s a lot of spare bedrooms in their manor, he reasons. He also doesn’t understand what came over him to offer, but he doesn’t take it back.

But it could be because he’s missed you. And he’s somewhat afraid that this may be the last time you see each other in a while due to your clashing schedules.

“You’re such a girl dad, Kenji,” you tease.

“Haha, good one,” he says, rolling his eyes at you. He took a couple of blankets from the closet and placed them on the bed.

“Just saying.”

“Whatever you say, Mommy.”

“Oh hush, Daddy.”

That ringed out a laugh from him. “Bleh, that sounds so embarrassing coming from you.”

You shrugged. “Hm? Don’t you think you’re embarrassing too?”

“I’m not.”

“Are too.”

“Am not.”

“Are too. I will not be going back and forth like this with you anymore, Kenji Sato. Good night!”

Kenji can’t hide the smile that appears on his face. Yeah, he definitely missed this. 

Definitely missed you.

SEUMYO © 2024. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, PLAGIARIZE, MODIFY OR TRANSLATE.

[bunnyrafe]

𓊆ྀིhave been thinking about small town carnival dates with blue collar!rafe like crazy… and how much he loves his babydoll…𓊇ྀི

content / warnings -> 18+, MDNI. short ‘n naughty f & cutesy!reader, fooling around in public, daddy kink.

just walking around in your little shorts that he keeps trying to yank down, eating your cotton candy ‘n sugar covered funnel cake with the stuffed bear he won you tucked under your arm.

“now y’have someone to keep you company while i work, right?” he said while handing you the pink bear you wanted, teasingly waving it in your face before you snatched it up ‘n rolled your eyes.

the heat is harsh given it’s mid july in north carolina, but it’s easier to endure when you two share freshly-squeezed strawberry lemonade flavored kisses whenever possible. all while you look at him with heart eyes, adoring the way he lets you cling to him.

whether it’s his arm or his shirt, he always makes sure there’s no chance in hell he’ll lose his baby in the crowds.

as the sun sets, you realize your little day out is coming to an end. it takes everything in you not to pout— you know rafe hates when you do since he works so hard to give you everything you have.

“had so much fun today, rafey…” you tug his arm a bit, trying your best not to sound whiney, “but we haven’t been on the ferris wheel yet, y’know…”

“alright, baby.” rafe can’t argue with such a simple request.

he’s not a monster, however he does have his conditions— “but we gotta get back home right after. got work early in the morning, sweetheart. you know that.”

“i know, i know.”

so you two end up on the ferris wheel. so many feet up that you can see every single light and bit of bright neon below you. from the food stands to the rides ‘n games. your tennis shoe covered feet are in rafe’s lap, while he rubs your calves and thighs— taking in the real view, which is you clutching your new favorite stuffie to your chest, face illuminated with splotches of different colors and your eyes fixed on the scene below you two.

he loves you more than he can stand.

maybe that’s why his hand goes a little farther than it should. his digits end up pressing against the front of your shorts, daring to rub over your clit through the material… only after squeezing up your thighs enough to make your breathing all huffy, of course.

your head finally snaps towards him— “daddy, we can’t here…”

he pouts back at you, “can touch what’s mine, can’t i?”

at that your knees spread a part a little wider, making room for his hand. he hums in approval, and huffs out a laugh when your thighs jolt as he applies just enough pressure to have you softly mewling.

“if you can cum f’me by the time this ride’s over, maybe we can stay out a little later— how’s that sound, babydoll?”

[bigwishes]

Big's Perma Bulk!

(Community Requested Story, about me perma bulking) What's good bros! It's your favourite wish granting genie here to go on my own transformation journey. Normally I send this kind of thing off to another writer but a lot of you wanted me to be transformation using my own Genie gifts so I've waved my hands and started it off.

I made sure to completely forget about what you guys wanted for me to make it even more surprising but considering all you lot drool at a bicep vein I think I'm in good hands.

After waking up I definitely didn't have anything to worry about. I knew all of you just wanted me to become some big sweaty himbo. Just take a look.

Big arms, thick thighs and a solid chest. I won't lie if I were to make a choice I would of ended up so much bigger than this but hey, it's what you all wanted to I guess I gotta get used to being a himbo stud.

Woah...I guess day two was a little different. I'm a lot bigger ladz so cheers for that but damn, some of this definition is starting to fade. It looks like I'm sliding more to the tank side of the spectrum that the stud side. I'm pretty sure if I move wrong this tank is gonna split in too and my fucking stomach won't stop rumbling, every time I walk in my kitchen I down half a box of cereal, fuck, I should probably take a couple sandwiches back to my desk before I load up some games with the boys.

'BUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRPP'

aw fuck, sorry about that ladz but damn. I woke up this morning and my stomach feels so tight, it feels like my abs are about to split in half. My shorts are so tight around my ass.

Damn what the fuck did you guys wish to happen to me? A slab of muscle instead of abs is one thing but fuck my gut is so bloated, ah man

'UURRRRRRRRRRPP!!!'

whoops, sorry dudes, fuck this is so tight but I still feel hungry, maybe a protein shake and a bowl of rice wont gut, surely this can't get any tighter.

ahhh fuck what time is it? 3am?? why the fuck am I so hungry. I didn't even know it was possible to feel hungry and bloated at the same-

BUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPP

ah man, what do I have in the fridge, mmmmm half a pizza, well I'm sure a couple of slices won't hurt. I hit the gym pretty hard today, its probably my body wanting to fuel up. mmm yeah just 3 maybe 6 slices and I'll be good for the night, probably best to turn the light switch on so I don't make a mess...

w--what the fuck happened to me! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I'M SO FUCKING BULKY, OH FUCK

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRPPP

DAMN....fuck well....at least it doesn't jiggle, probably just bloated from how much I've been eating recently, who knew having such big muscles would make me so hungry all the time...

hmmm, I probably shouldn't leave just 3 slices of pizza in the fridge on their, own, that's not even a snack, 9 slices is alright at this time of night yeah?

On the bright side, my muscles have continued to blow up to freakish size, my bicep is bigger than most dude's heads. On the other hand....I can't shift this tank around my mid section. I've been trying to eat less to get my abs back but fuck I can't help it, my stomach growls and I gotta eat enough to feed at least 3 people or else it feels like my stomach is gonna eat itself. It's okay, Ill just cut when summer rolls around, use this time to grow as big as I can, bet my abs will look fucking insane in a few months/

Guess the bright side is I can order that nice chocolate cake with my pizza tonight...I'm pretty sure it's cheat night tonight, or was it last night? hmm, no yeah it is definitely tonight?

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP

ah fuck, wh- UUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP

what happened - uurp - to me?

a few *hic* days ago I was a lean mean lifting machine

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRPPPPPPPPP

and now...fuck *hic* uuurp- I'm a big, bulky brute

fuu-UUUUUUUURPPPP-ck, my gut is so tight, moving feels like a chore....I'm so fuckin stuffed and hungry at the same time. Who knew my fans would want me to blow up into a 300lsb bulky beast...

damn...I need a shower but, I could really go for a double cheese burger and a snickers protein thick shake, I'm sure it can wait -uuurrpp- maybe I should grab a couple protein bars for the road..

BUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPP!!!!

I can still feel the spell under my skin, I wonder how much bigger these guys will make me, or what else they'll do...

[loulovingho]

“Hey, it's me!” Tommy called out as he entered Evan's place.

“I- In the living room,” Buck replied, sounding a little anxious.

“You ready to head to the gym?” Tommy clapped his hands together as he headed toward Buck.

When he got into the living room, Buck was sitting a chair, sweatpants and hoodie on.

Tommy felt something was off right away. Especially when Buck made no effort to get up, or even look in Tommy's direction.

“You okay?” Tommy asked, eyebrows furrowed.

“Yeah,” Buck answered, tugging the hood further over his head. “Still don't know why we couldn't just practice Muay Thai at your place.”

“Because when we practice Muay Thai at my place we end up naked on the mat.”

“And that's a bad thing?” Evan tried to sound cheeky, but it was more awkward than anything with the way he continued to lower his head, trying to cover his entire face with his hoodie.

Tommy crossed his arms. “Evan, what's wrong? Why won't you look at me?”

“Nothing! No reason. Let's go!” Buck went to stand, but Tommy held out his arm to keep him in place.

“Evan, what's going on? Did something happen at work? Did you get hurt? Did someone hit you?” he asked, each question filled with more concern.

“No, no, it's-” Buck took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Hesitantly, he reached up and pulled his hoodie down, then angled his face up toward Tommy.

Tommy didn't mean to let out a gasp, or jump back the way he did at the sight of Evan's face, but he couldn't help it. The blisters scattered over his face and neck looked like something straight out of a horror film.

“Wow, thanks,” Buck muttered, grabbing his phone. “Just what every guy wants their boyfriend to do when they look at them.”

“No, I- Evan, I'm sorry, I just...” he leaned in to get a better look. “What the hell happened?”

Buck looked at himself through the camera on his phone. “It's not that bad, is it?”

“It... It's not good. I think we need to get you to the hospital.”

“No, I don't wanna go to the hospital like this, Tommy. They'll quarantine me or something!”

“Honey, that might be what you need,” Tommy replied pointedly.

“Tommy!”

“Evan, I don't... I don't know what this is. You've gotta be in pain.”

“It- It's not too bad.”

“Evan.”

“Stop saying my name like that,” Buck whined.

“You just said my name like that.”

“Tommy!”

“Evan!”

“Okay, okay, that's enough,” Buck said, getting up from his chair. “Let's go do some Muay Thai.”

“You've got to be joking. We are not going to the gym.”

“Great!” Buck smiled, wincing slightly at the pain it caused. “Your place it is.”

Tommy sighed, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

Buck's face fell. “What are you doing?”

“I'm texting Eddie.”

“You are not texting Eddie.”

“I am too texting Eddie.”

“Tommy!”

“Evan!”

“Ugh!” Buck rolled his eyes, turning and heading for the kitchen.

“Babe, if you won't go to the hospital, you can at least have Eddie come check you out,” Tommy said, following behind Buck, “because I don't know what this is and I have a feeling you don't either.”

“Actually, I do.” Buck reached into his fridge and grabbed a water, then turned back to Tommy.

“Okay? Enlighten me, please.”

“It's a curse.”

Tommy stared at Buck for a moment. A few moments actually. Blinking once, twice, before, “Yeah, I'm texting Eddie.”

“No, I'm serious,” Buck said as Tommy sent the text. “See, I- I bought a mummy for work.”

Tommy gently set his phone down on the counter, nodding. “As one does.”

“Exactly. And, I- I didn't know it was a real mummy. Price was definitely too low for that.”

“Wait a minute. You bought a real mummy?”

“Unknowingly,” Buck clarified.

Tommy had dealt with a lot of odd things in his life. And he couldn't deny that dating Evan made his world even more odd and eccentric, but this definitely took the cake.

“Okay, Evan, I... you aren't cursed.”

“Take a good look at this, Tommy,” Buck said, leaning over the countertop. “This is a curse.”

“That,” Tommy replied, gesturing toward Evan's face, “is probably some sort of infection. Possibly from touching a decaying corpse.”

Buck reached up, feeling just below one of the blisters. “It does kinda hurt.”

“And that's why-” Tommy paused as his phone buzzed. He picked it up and read the text, then turned it to show Buck, “that's why Eddie will be here in about fifteen minutes. Why don't we get you back to the couch while we wait?” He motioned for Buck to come around the counter. As Buck rounded the corner and neared him, Tommy held out his hands and guided Buck back toward the living room without touching him.

“Are you avoiding contact with me?” Buck questioned, glancing back at him with a glare.

“Until I find out if this is some sort of plague, I'm maintaining proper distance.”

Buck plopped down on the couch while Tommy opted for the chair Buck hadn't been sitting in when he first arrived.

“So, no Muay Thai today, huh?”

“No, no Muay Thai.”

Buck sighed dramatically, looking over at Tommy with his pouty eyes on display. “No sexy time either?”

There had been many times over the last nearly six months that Tommy had thought, I'd give him whatever he wanted. Anything he asked for, wouldn't even question it.

This was not one of those times.

He swore one of the blisters had gotten bigger just since he'd arrived.

He shook his head. “Absolutely not.”

[inkdrinkerworld]

Inn Love

cw: friends to lovers, cowboy!james, innkeeper!reader, pet names, fluff, scene setting really

wc: 2.6k

“Please Jamie? I just need a couple pounds of butter.” You bat your eyes at him, all sweet and innocent but James knows you.

“If I give you what I have left I won’t have any to sell in the market this weekend.” He’s trying to stand firm. He really really is.

For all your sweetness and innocence, you’re like a viper to James’ strength of will.

“I’ll pay you more than the market.” You’ll definitely try, but James can never charge you full price.

“I’m sorry, darling. Go to Malloy, he sells butter too.”

You wrinkle your nose. “No one sells butter that’s as good as yours, Jamie.” You’re trying as hard as you can, James seems unmoved. So you up the ante. “I’ll bring you one of the pound cakes on top of payment.”

James falters a bit then. You bake the best in the entire town. At your inn, The Secret Garden, that’s one of the best reviews after the impeccable mattresses. You also know James has the softest, sweetest spot for pound cake- especially the blood orange pound cake you make.

He groans and you squeal, your boots clicking on the cobble. James gestures for you to come into his house.

“You’re so fucking evil.” he mumbles, reaching into his second fridge and handing you three pounds of butter. You take a quick peek and find his fridge stocked with pre packaged butter wrapped pretty in parchment, cheese in there too. There’s even milk. James is the best damn dairy farmer this town has ever seen and it’s a wonder how he ever has enough butter.

“You are an angel, James Potter.” you wrap your arms around his neck, and James’ hands automatically wrap around your back.

He’s big and warm, smells like leather and blood oranges and for all his muscles James is surprisingly soft.

James can’t fight the smile on his lips when you let go of him. You really are sweet. “You’re lucky I made more butter today.”

You gasp, not at all surprised. “You playing hard ball with me, Jamie?”

He nods, setting his hat on the counter. “Maybe I wanted a pound cake for free.” he teases but James would never take anything from you without paying you no matter how much you try to get him to. He doesn’t really care that you’re friends, he’s paying you for everything.

“You’re losing angel status, Potter. I gotta go, gotta bake for breakfast tomorrow and for the market this weekend.”

“See ya’, darling.”

James spots you while you’re closing up your booth at the market and hands off the empty crates he was hauling to his friends, Sirius and Remus.

He jogs over to you, and places his hands on your shoulders. You startle and almost swing a punch at him but he catches your fist.

“Okay Rocky,” he chuckles when you put your hand to your chest, breathing heavily like you’d just run a mile.

“You scared me, James! How don’t you make noise when you walk?”

James rolls his eyes, taking your crates from you. You move to packing bags.

“I make lots of noise, you’re just in your head.” He says, you shrug with a smile.

“Did they buy all of your butter?” you ask as you start walking towards your truck, James close behind.

“And the milk and the cheese.” You roll your eyes at his cocky tone.

You know James better than most here. You went to school together, you used to ranch with him when you were younger and when his mom and dad still owned the ranch.

Then you’d both had to grow up, you going to business school and James having to take over the ranch after his mom and dad had gotten sick.

You’d come back for the funeral and been there when James couldn’t get out of bed to deal with the ranch and all the shit that came with that and stayed till he got better and could do it himself.

Then James helped you with the construction of The Secret Garden, your inn that became your baby.

All this to say is, you know James Potter and he’s not as cocky as he pretends to be.

Sure he’s any woman’s dream. With his inky curls always peeking out under his hat, his muscle tees that show off tan, muscled arms, his pretty brown eyes that remind you so much of browned butter and his fucking dimples.

But James is a sweetheart.

“I told you about that tone, Jamie. Makes you sound too sure of yourself.”

James only chuckles, placing the crates in your tray and the rest of your stuff.

“I’m sorry weren’t you telling me the other day that my butter’s the best?”

You wave him off, laughing as you open the back door.

“Do I give you your loaf now or at family dinner tonight?”

James smiles, this is the one routine you and James still have from when you were kids. You go over on Sunday night for family dinner and then you go to the inn and try to get to sleep before your three am alarm.

“I just spent all day in the hot sun and you’re gonna deprive me? You’re cruel, darling.”

You laugh, handing him the loaf and then reaching in your cooler for a bottle of water. “Here Jamie.”

James’ mouth is already stained pink with the icing from your cake. Crumbs clinging to his shirt and chin.

“James! Have some dignity.” your words are broken up with your laugh, James smiles when you hand him the open water bottle.

“Thanks, darling.” Half the loaf cake is gone, and James guzzles the water like he’s been dying of thirst the whole day.

You watch James drink, aware that you’ve been staring a little longer than necessary and James knows it too because he winks at you.

“What are we having for dinner, James?”

James smiles, “Beef, you wanted that last time when we had chicken.”

You smile, giddy as ever. If it’s one thing James can do is roast beef; it’s always tender and perfect.

“Do you need me to come over early and do the potatoes? With the rosemary and thyme?” James nods, breaking off another little bite of the cake.

“Meet me there in an hour? I know you gotta do dinner at the inn.”

You shake your head, “I got Mary doing dinner tonight, and I wanna check on Snowglobe.”

James’ hand falls over his heart, a look of mock offense on his face. “Do you not believe me when I tell you he’s okay?”

You roll your eyes, “Can’t I want to take my best boy for a little leg stretch?”

James grumbles, “Best boy? Snowglobe took two years to train when we were kids.”

You smile as you remember all the days you’d sleep in James’ room complaining about how Snowglobe hated you and would never warm up to you.

“And now he’s the best horse a girl could have.You’re just jealous Jamie.”

He says nothing, just takes his loaf cake and presses a kiss to your forehead.

“I’ll follow behind you. Try not to drive like you’re on a race track, yeah?” You nod, getting into your truck and letting James close the door for you.

You don’t listen to James’ words and speed towards his ranch, foot to the pedal even as you swing into the grocery for chocolate for dessert- lest you and James pass away without a sweet treat after dinner.

At his place, in the Big House, you and James work side by side prepping dinner. He seasons the beef, you season the potatoes and put them to roast and then start on a chocolate cake.

It’s not a fancy one, but it’s occasion enough for a chocolate cake.

“How long till everything is finished?” Sirius asks, hat on his chest as he walks in holding a six pack.

“About an hour.” You and James say at the same time. Remus rolls his eyes as he steps in behind his boyfriend.

“I got your fruit, you didn’t stop by.” He holds out three bowls of cut fruit and you smile.

“Thanks Rem, I swear everyone came for bread today! I sold out of it so fast I really contemplated going back to the inn and baking more.”

The boys hum, smiling when James opens a beer and slides it to you. You take it with a nod and a smile. Quickly, you uncover the bowl of watermelon, taking a few pieces and smiling at the sweetness.

“It’s cos it’s fucking amazing bread. Lasts the whole fucking week too.” A compliment from Sirius is always genuine- as long as you’d known him, about two years, you can count on one hand how many sweet words the man says.

Conversation lulls, James talks about his plans for the week, Sirius talks about how there’s too many people trying to build big condos in your town- he’s in real estate and Remus talks of how much simpler life had gotten since he’d started raising chickens again.

You shoot out of your seat, James watches you curiously. You pull the cake from the oven and turn to all three of them stern as can be, “Those potatoes have ten minutes. I’m going to see my horse, do not let them burn.”

You rush out of the Big House without another word, boots clicking against the wooden floors and then crunching on the gravel path as you make your way to the stables.

“Snowglobe, baby.” You call, passing each stall till you find your baby’s.

Snowglobe is an old boy, almost twenty four, but he’s always been perfect. He’s all white, a pretty shiny sort of white on his coat that makes him look like fresh fallen snow. Hence his name.

He raises his head as he sees you, tail flicking as you reach a hand into his stall.

“I missed you, old boy.” You kiss his nose, stepping into the stall and getting a brush. You’re sure the farm hands James hired keep him well groomed, but he likes a bit of pampering and he deserves it too.

You brush through his mane, talking to him and sneaking a couple apples to him.

There’s a knock on the stable doors and you startle, you hear James’ deep chuckle before you see him. “Dinner’s ready,”

You kiss Snowglobe on his nose again. “I’ll come by tomorrow and we’ll go riding, baby.”

James rolls his eyes when Snowglobe puts his face on your shoulder, stopping you from moving.

You grin wide, “I promise, old boy. We’ll go riding all evening.”

Snowglobe seems pleased because he lifts his head and lets you go.

“He’s as clingy as you are,” James says as you walk out beside him.

“He’s not clingy! He’s the best and I don’t come see him nearly enough.”

James scoffs, “The four times a week you ride him up and down the ranch isn’t enough?” He bumps your hips with his.

You shrug your shoulders with a smile, “He likes the exercise and your boys still saddle him. He doesn’t like it.”

James is well aware, Snowglobe tosses saddles off him if he’s feeling particularly annoyed with the weight of them some days.

James pushes open the door to the Big House. You walk past him, taking your seat on the table and groaning.

“This is gonna be fucking great.” Sirius laughs at your swear, and loads up your plate- roast potatoes, roast beef and salad.

By the time you’re all finished dinner, you and James have had two slices of cake each and you’re both sprawled on his sofa.

Remus is laying on Sirius with his hat on his stomach and Sirius’ is pulled low on his face.

“I gotta get going,” you say, breaking the silence. Your words are groggy, sleep close in your reaches the longer you lay beside James.

James sits up, “What time is your alarm?”

“Three thirty.”

James tries pulling you down beside him, but you don’t budge. “I’ll drop you back in the morning.”

You huff, a little amused. “What time do you usually wake up, James?”

“Four. I gotta check the fences though, so three thirty ain’t bad.”

There’s no use arguing with him, and you don’t really want to. He stretches out on the sofa,

Sirius and Remus are out cold, James doesn’t even move them. He just throws a blanket over them.

“C’mon, the guest room is always ready for you.” James sounds just as tired as you feel, his eyes look a little glassy too.

“Thanks Jamie,” you push open the door and smell the lavender spray you use at night strong as if you’d just sprayed it.

“Course darling, your blanket’s there too. Come get me when your alarm goes off, yeah?” James kisses your forehead, you smile.

“Yeah Jamie. Go get some sleep.”

You climb under your blankets, grinning when you smell the linen detergent James uses. Sleep comes quick, your eyes heavier than they’ve been all day now that you’re laying down.

-

Someone is shaking your shoulder and you don’t like it.

“Stop,” you groan, pushing the hand off you and pulling your blanket over your head.

“Darling it’s nearly three thirty. Come get some coffee.”

You groan, twisting in protest under the covers. “No. I’ll be down at three thirty.”

James rolls his eyes. “Don’t make me use advanced waking up tactics.”

Your head pops out of the covers, hair a little messed up. “You are not tugging this cover off me James. I swear to god.”

James smiles, “You’re so pleasant in the morning. C’mon, we’ll have coffee and one of those breakfast sandwiches and I’ll drop you off.”

The grumble you let out makes James laugh some more.

“Give me five minutes.” James nods, leaving the room and letting you go about your morning routine.

You find James pulling two sandwiches from his oven, setting yours on a plate and biting into his immediately.

“Thanks Jamie, where’s my coffee?”

James tilts his head to the pot, your favourite cup sitting right beside it.

“Your creamer’s in the fridge.”

You frown, “Where did you get sugar free creme brûlée creamer in the middle of summer?”

James shrugs, “Not telling. But it’s there.” James takes a sip of his own coffee, black with just a touch of sugar. “It’s turkey in the sandwich too.”

You smile, fixing your cup and then shuffling towards James to kiss his cheek.

“You’re cute, thank you Jamie.”

His cheeks redden without meaning too. “Eat so we can go darling. You got scones to bake and what is it today? Eggs and bacon with toasted sourdough?”

You nod, biting into your sandwich. “Yeah and I gotta do cookies today, want me to bring any over?”

James frowns, “Today?” You nod, taking the last bite of your sandwich and finishing off your coffee.

“Taking Snowglobe out after I finish up dinner at the inn.”

James rolls his eyes playfully. Since the moment Snowglobe stopped fighting you, the pair of you had been inseparable. “Yeah, you can bring a couple. Make sure and eat lunch.”

“Left overs?” Your eyes are wide and hopeful as you look at James. He feels his chest constrict a little.

He opens the fridge and pulls out a bowl, “Got everything here for you.”

“Angel status has been restored Jamie,” James grins, dimples poking out. Truly, he’d never been worried, you’re never actually upset with him ever. Angel status is always applied, but he can’t deny the way it makes him feel when you tell him that it is.

“You’re so gracious!” James bows, making you giggle and slap his shoulder. “Ready?” He asks as he rights himself. James opens the fridge again, pulling out the bowls of fruit Remus had brought over and setting them on your lunch.

“Ready, Jamie.”

[r0-boat]

Sitri x AFAB!reader x Amy

They both fuck you

Cw: breeding, slight baby trapping(Sitri saying questionable things), porn with little plot, Threesome, spit roasting, arguing, slight choking.

Amy is calm and Sitri fucking loses it lol

You don't remember how you got here... Your poor cunt getting brutally fucked by a devil while the other devil who is arguing with him is stuffed in your mouth.

Wait...Yes you do.

You need a devil's energy, and since everyone in Gehenna Who could help you was in a meeting, You stumbled around your vision, getting dizzy as your breath grew shallow, trying to find anyone in the castle. Anyone! You are so desperate. You could even feel The heat pulling between your legs as your body screamed at you to find someone.

Trying to focus on steadying yourself, You didn't notice the big figure in front of you. You ran face first into him, You swore you feel your head bounce off his chest.

"HEY! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE FUCKING GOING!" The man snaps, but his eyes widen when he recognizes you. "Oh! I-I'm sorry. Please, you have to be more careful." His voice went from loud and demanding to soft and gentle in seconds.

But you don't answer as you try to keep your body from passing out. You cling onto the devil, your fingers digging into his white uniform that was half hazard tossed on his otherwise bare chest. You could almost recognize his voice, but you were too weak to think about it. The demon caught you in his arms as you almost collapsed.

"Oh fuck! h-hey take it easy! Are you okay?"

He asks as if you didn't just almost pass out.

"Oh yeah, you must be Solomon's child... Oh fuck. Shit! You don't look so good!"In preparation for scenarios like this, Satan informed everyone of your condition just in case you happen to be out and about and you need emergency devil's energy. Amy knew how urgent this was because he knew how important you were to Satan.

"So I just gotta put my dick in you, and you'll feel better? Okay, piece of cake."Amy muttered because he lifted you into his arms. He left papers he had prepared for the meeting scattered on the floor. Amy ran down the hall as fast as he could, cradling you in his arms in the first room he found clean and vacant. He practically kicks down the door, laying you on the couch.

Immediately, he begins tripping his clothing. He wasn't hard, not yet, But he did feel a little buzz looking at you, You're flushed face, and you're rising and falling chest, Your clothes that hugged your body just right yet leaving some for the imagination. Fuck... The two of you have interacted much, Not as much as Leraye or Piemon or even damn Sitri. But he knew why Satan liked you. Oh, he could absolutely see it.

His hands gently caress you as if stalling to rip your clothes off. He could feel heat flush to his face. You open your eyes seeing a familiar figure. "Amy, please... I need you so bad," You whisper in a breathy tone that stole his away. He nods his big hands beginning to strip you slowly.

It's been so long since he had been with anyone, let alone another human. They had different parts than the one he used to sleep with. Then a penis they had folds that looked rather inviting and quite tasty...

His body moved on his own as he left your legs up to run his tongue across your cunt. One lick, and you buck your hips, finally feeling some relief you desperately craved, but it's not enough. "Please, more!" You whine. Your fingers dig into Amy's locks, pulling him into you, which he happily lets you. His tongue slides inside your folds, and his eyes roll back at your taste.

'So sweet... So good...'

It wasn't before long that your juices so his tongue. He holds you gently yet firmly as he slurps at your gushing. He didn't even realize how close you were until your sweet juices flooded his mouth. His horns and cock were drooling, and his mouth was glistening with your cum. He licked his lips as he crawled on top of you. His lips meet yours as you taste yourself on his tongue.

"Tell me if it hurts. Please," He says. You nod. Your hands dig into his shoulders, bracing yourself as you watch his huge cock slowly begin to press itself inside you. When his cock glides inside you, you watch as Amy tilts his head up, His tongue rolling out at the tight squeeze. You wrap your legs around him, and being inside you becomes torture for Amy, but still, he is waiting, scared that if you move too soon, he might break you. But you are not having it. You needed his 'devil's energy' and you needed it now. "Move Amy!" You demanded, which startled him, but he nodded, moving his hips slowly at first until he started picking up the pace, a nice sensual, deep pace, each thrust going so deep, brushing against every spot, making your toes curl. It had been so long for the devil. He was a lot closer than he thought he would be. He tries to hold on and make you come first before he explodes inside you. He licks, sucks, and bites your neck, his hands running over and touching, manhandling your body, His rough hands scraping against your soft skin. You tighten around him and come on his cock, feeling your tight squeeze. He gives in, filling your cunt up with delicious devil's energy.

Amy holds you to his chest. He smiles at you. He opens his mouth to speak, but the door bursts again. A very familiar blue-haired devil stares at the both of you... In his office... On his couch, naked, smelling of sex. Hearing your heart pounding in your chest, he couldn't tell if it was from sex or the fact he caught the both of you.

"Explain." A single word falls from his lips, his tone just as icy as his gaze as he glares down at the both of you. Amy glared back, cradling you in his arms as if protecting you. Finally, coming back to your senses You fully recognize where you are and what's going on You take a deep breath, and your eyes widen, stunned for a moment. You stutter, trying to form words, but Amy cuts you off. "I found them in the hallway They looked awful and they needed devil's energy if I wasn't there they would have died."

Sitri gives you an unreadable expression. His eyes widen, but his face is blank. He looks at both you and Amy. You could steal your heart, jumping out of your chest as you see Sitri clutching his fist and his fingers digging into his palms.

"Solomon."

He smiles, saying his nickname for you in a sing-song tone. The click of his shoes fills your ears as he steps closer.

"You want more right?"

In one hand movement he rips Amy off of you throwing him to the ground.

"Because I can't imagine a devil-like this satisfying you!" He growls, ripping his clothes off; his eyes are wild with burning anger, lust, and hot jealousy. Amy could only watch from the floor as Sitri grabbed you roughly, pinning you to the arm of the couch. You let out a loud, sharp squeal feeling his cock enter you in one thrust. Amy watched your eyes roll back as Sitri's pace was immediately rough and fast.

"This is how you satisfy Solomon!" He hisses through his teeth. "I know them better than anyone to know that they like being fucked like a cheap whore!"

Amy wanted to help you. His heart raced at how rough his rival was treating you, but at the same time, he didn't want to be left in the dust. He didn't want to sit by and watch as Sitri took you from him. And with your mouth occupied, drooling as you stare down at him, licking your lips, how could he not give you what you're so desperately asking?

He could feel his cock already hardening once again as he stood up. Your eyes light up as his dick dangles in front of your face. You open your mouth obediently; Amy nuzzles his fingers in your hair as he slowly pushes his dick in your mouth.

Sitri was quick to notice. "That's why you'll never satisfy them like I do, too gentle, too soft! You're lucky that I'm letting your diseased dick even near them!"

Your eyes flash a little bit as you feel Amy's cock twitch in your mouth as Amy growls back. "You're too rough! If this is how you treat them, then you'll be the reason why they go back to Earth!"

Sitri lets out a dark, crazed chuckle that makes you clench. "They will not leave me. I will not let them; I will trap them here any means necessary-!"

He leans down, whispering into your ear, wrapping a hand around your throat, feeling your pulse along with the stretch of your throat around Amy's shaft. "If I have to breed you, pump you full of my spawn, then so be it!"

Your eyes roll back. His breath tickled your ear as he whispered something so heinous, so dark, so delicious You go over the edge, and coming on his cock, your orgasm rips through you as you moan on Amy's dick. You milk Sitri as he explodes inside your pussy. His hips are still deep inside you, making sure you take every last drop of his seed.

And Amy feels your throat vibrate against his cock. He cums, sinking his teeth into his lips, trying failing not to moan too loud as he grinds into your face. You eagerly drink up every last drop of warm demonic seed going into your belly.

Three of you collapse, shuffling to the couch to demons on either side, their hands on your thighs, touching you and snuggling against your body.

For the first time, they did not argue; they just sat there enjoying your company, too tired to say anything negative towards each other.

[bitchesuntitled]

Softer

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader

Summary: Joel’s feeling a tad self-conscious

Warnings/Tags: Humor, No outbreak AU, Tommy being an asshole in a brotherly way, fluff, pregnancy, sympathetic pregnancy, blended families, strip tease, nothing bad happens to Sarah ever and Ellie's your kid, and I think that’s it?

A/N: Thank you much @strang3lov3, @whocaresstillthelouvre, @jay-zzle for your eyes and Jai also for the moodboard!!! 😍🥰😘

This is for @beefrobeefcal’s Joel Sat on Me challenge! I hope you laugh at this as much as I did writing it 😅

Masterlist||AO3

Divider by @saradika-graphics

The gender reveal/baby shower was going off without a hitch. Maria was making sure people knew where to put gifts, Tommy was helping Joel at the grill, while your mom was helping you put the Boy or Girl banner around you. You hate this kind of attention but Maria and your parents both wanted to make a show of it. Despite your arguments on tradition being only for the first baby.

“Well, it’s you and Joel’s first baby together,” Maria deadpanned, all while your mom nodded along.

“Can’t beat that logic!” Your dad grinned.

“Fine,” you relented, rolling your eyes, “Good thing it’s the last one too.” 

Joel smirked, his palm caressing your thigh, “It’ll be fine,” he whispered in your ear, “Least there will be cake,” he added with a shrug. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“Can’t beat that logic!” You reply mockingly, sticking your tongue out.

—

“Mom!” Ellie shouts, “Sarah’s trying to sneak into the cake!”

“Quit being such a narc!” Sarah laughs, playfully smacking Ellie’s arm, “You want to know just as much as I do!”

“Girls!” Joel hollers. “Come help your uncle Tommy set up!”

Both girls walk to the grill, helping Tommy carry hamburgers and hotdogs to the table.

“Alright everyone!” Maria announces, raising her voice to get everyone’s attention. “Let’s eat! Parents-to-be first!”

“Hey momma,” Joel grins, meeting you at the food table and placing a soft kiss on your temple, “What ya in the mood for?”

“More like what is the baby in the mood for?” you grumble, trying to adjust the sash around your body. “I hate this fucking thing,” you hiss.

“Just gotta eat, cut the cake and get through presents then I’ll kick everyone out,” Joel reassures.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” you mumble, grabbing a plate and staring at the food. The baby decided it wanted corn on the cob, a burger with all the extras, potato salad, and a small salad with more ranch on it than lettuce.

“Jesus Joel,” Tommy laughed when you both got to one of the tables. “Your woman’s the one eatin’ for two not you!”

Everyone looked at Joel with his plate piled high with two burgers, two hotdogs, and plenty of sides to feed a small army. You saw the flush creeping up his neck as he sat next to you. Joel opened his mouth to say something but Maria interrupted.

“Oh hush,” Maria said, smacking Tommy softly on the shoulder.

“Probably going through that sympathetic pregnancy thing,” a guest piped in. “My husband did that too!”

“Sympathetic pregnancy?” Ellie asked with her mouth full of potato salad. Your mom begins to laugh, shaking her head at Ellie.

“Ellie, gross,” you hiss. “Finish eating before you speak.”

Ellie makes a show of swallowing her food before speaking again. “What the hell is sympathetic pregnancy?”

“Ellie,” you groan. “Language! I haven’t spent the past 13 years raising a hellion!”

“And just think, you’re starting over!” your dad laughs.

Joel, meanwhile, keeps pushing the food around on his plate, taking smaller bites of the sides.

“Okay, googled it!” Sarah announces to the table, wagging her phone and clearing her throat. “Google says, c- cou- nevermind, I’m not even gonna try. Sympathetic pregnancy is a proposed condition in which an expectant father experiences some of the same symptoms and behavior as his pregnant partner. These most often include major weight gain, altered hormone levels, morning nausea, and disturbed sleep patterns.”

“That why you were asking for Pepto the other day at the site?” Tommy asks, nudging Joel’s shoulder before sitting down. “Dealing with some morning sickness as well?”

“Damn it Tommy,” Joel growls, balling up his fist. “If you don’t cut it out-“

“Alright, alright,” Maria hisses. “Enough.” She adds pointing at Tommy.

—

Joel stood in front of the mirror, looking at himself. Marriage had been good to him. His mental health and financial stability had improved, and he seemed overall a happier person. The only drawback seemed to be the effect it had on his waistline the moment he got you pregnant. He hadn’t thought about it before but Tommy got in his head. Especially when he announced to everyone at the party it made sense now why Joel had to move his tool belt to the next hole for it to fit.

“Whatcha lookin’ at hot stuff?” You smirk, standing in the doorway of the adjoining bathroom with your toothbrush in hand.

“Thinkin’ I need to go on a diet,” Joel huffs out, turning towards you with his hands on his hips.

“The fuck would you do that for?!”

“Tommy’s ri—“

“I swear if the next words out of your mouth are Tommy’s right.” You pout, trying your best to not let the toothpaste escape your mouth as you move back into the bathroom, spitting into the sink, “I’m gonna kill ‘em.”

Going back to the bedroom, you sit on the edge of the bed, watching Joel find his pajamas for the night. Sure, he’s gotten thicker in the middle since you got pregnant. His pants fit a bit tighter around his thighs. His chest, oh god his chest, the way your hands grip onto the meaty pecs he has now. You make a small noise at the memory of this morning before the girls woke up, and how you rode him as best you could with your swollen belly in the way, slick pooling in your underwear.

“What?” Joel asks, turning to look at you, noticing that feral glint in your eyes. He’s seen it more and more as the months have gone by. Sarah’s mom was nothing compared to you at this stage in pregnancy. Revved up and ready to go 24/7 these days.

“Tommy’s got it totally wrong,” you grin, “I love the way you look these days Joel.”

“Yeah?” Joel smiles shyly, rubbing the back of his neck, turning to face you, “what.. uh.. what about it?”

“Dad bod through and through,” you hum, adjusting on the bed to sit a little further back. “Was thinking about this morning, how I can hold onto your chest a little better with your pecs being a little softer.”

“Yeah?” Joel grins, watching your eyes track his fingers as they open the first couple buttons of his flannel, his chest barely peeking out through the fabric, “Should I put on a show?”

“I wanna see my man!” you let out a breath nodding your head eagerly.

“Feel like we need some music or something,” Joel says, letting out a shy laugh, trailing his palms down the front of his shirt, popping open more of the buttons. You begin humming 70’s porno music, “No thank you, that’s enough.”

You shrug letting out a giggle as he continues unbuttoning his shirt, his strong chest and thick belly being revealed as he rips the flannel shirt back in a dramatic fashion, spreading his legs wide and tilting his head to sway his curls behind him.

“Jesus Christ, Napoleon Dynamite. Ya gonna take it off or what?”

“‘Scuse me?” Joel asks, straightening up, pinning you with a look, pulling his flannel back over his shoulders, “Listen, I’ve never done this for anybody. I’d ‘preciate if ya didn’t make rude comments.”

You clear your throat and lean your arms back against the bedding to prop yourself up, “Sorry, horny goblins took over, proceed.”

With his flannel shirt open, he starts flipping his belt open, stalking towards you, nodding your head at this new development, sliding his belt out quickly from his belt loops causing a gasp to escape your lips.

“Mmmm,” you moan softly, thighs squeezing together, and squirming on the bed “Joel. You look so fucking good like this.”

Joel spins around to show you his backside before slipping one shoulder of the flannel off, turning his head to the side with a smirk as he slowly slides it off his arm, followed by the other. You hear the button and zipper of his jeans sliding down. He begins teasing you with his jeans, dropping them some before pulling them back up and swiveling his hips, he puts one foot on the opposite leg to try and help pull the leg out.

“Fuck!” He yelps, as he falls back sitting on you, “Shit that wasn’t supposed to happen!”

“Ow!” You groan, smacking his ass to get him to move. He rolls off you to lay beside you on the bed.

“You good?” Joel asks, laying on his side next to you, placing his palm on your belly.

“Yeah, I’m good,” you grin, placing your hand on top of his with a sigh. “No Magic Mike in here, but for your first attempt that was good Miller,” you add with a smirk.

“Fuck you,” Joel grins, leaning up to kiss you.

“Fuck. Please!” You groan, grabbing his shoulders and pulling him in for a deeper kiss.

[soupydumplingss]

So what a man gotta do? ~ OP⁸¹

Pairing: Oscar Piastri x Fem!Reader

Short note: Reader has no idea that Oscar is a famous guy. Oscar can't handle babies to save his life. Reader is an overworker. The plot feels cliché but I am very unoriginal/j

Warnings: Light profanities, bickering

Summary: You are an overworked corporate freak. You were on business to Monte Carlo, Monaco. You were trying to enjoy a good breakfast, not hear some F1 racer's baby niece crying.

..........................................................................................

You were in your hotel bed, sprawled up between the sheets. It was a sleepless night. A ray of sunshine penetrated your room from a tiny creak of a window and hit your face. Your phone alarm rang loudly, echoing through the room. You were annoyed.

"End my misery, Good God," you huffed, annoyed.

You had no choice but to wake up. Your stomach was growling. As you tried to get out of your bed, you accidentally tripped and fell on your butt.

What a way to start the day, you thought.

You stepped into the large bathroom of your hotel room to freshen up. The morning seemed to run slow and lazy. You looked at yourself in the mirror while brushing your teeth. The eyebags under your circles had visibly darkened a lot more from overworking. You couldn't help but still think about work.

Man, I still have another program left. Why didn't the code compile? Did I write any statement wrong? Or was it the argument?

You were lost in your own sea of thoughts. You were pulled back to reality when your stomach growled again. The tap was running endlessly. You quickly freshened up and took a quick shower. You wrapped yourself in a bathrobe and got out of the bathroom. Shivers ran down your spine at the air circulating in the room, hitting the areas the bathrobe couldn't cover. You quickly wore an oversized t-shirt and a pair of jeans to head out for breakfast to a cafe.

Phone, check. Purse, check. Laptop in backpack, check.

You went downstairs at the reception to check out for some time. The receptionist flashed you a polite smile. You were headed to Café de Paris. The streets of Monte Carlo in the morning was a sight for sore eyes. Gentle breezes blew and hit your face every now and then. The road wasn't very busy.

"Taxi!"

You waved your hand at a taxi to take a ride to your destination.

"Où voulez-vous aller, madame?,The driver asked politely. where do you want to go, miss?

"Café de Paris. Combien cela coûterait-il?," you asked to make sure the driver got his pay and you reached your destination properly. cafe de paris. how much would that be?

"100€, madame."

You got inside the taxi to get to the cafe. The ride on the way there was pleasant. The rolled-down calm window allowed the occasional zephyr to hit your face ever so gently. The view of Monte Carlo was nothing short of an amazement. The lavish buildings, infrastructures, the hoard of luxury cars: Nothing about Monte Carlo was less than class and elegance.

You are drawn out of your reverie as the taxi suddenly stops. You stepped out of the car and paid the driver. Stepping into the café, your senses are overwhelmed by the smell of pungent caffeine, freshly baked goods, savories and drinks. The bright sunlight filters through the windows, bathing the room in a soft light. In the corner, you spotted an empty table. It was located near the wall of the café. A waiter appears nearby. He asks if he could assist you, and you inform him that you are looking for a table for one. The waiter escorted you to your table. He was waiting for your order. The light from the sun beamed through the window and hit his face as he took the order.

"One espresso, one chocolate chaud, le wrap saumon, and one tranche de cake. Will that be all?" The waiter asked, smiling.

"Yes, that will be all", you replied.

"It will be out in a few minutes", the waiter said as he walked away.

You were peacefully enjoying your breakfast in the cafe, enjoying the atmosphere and the taste of her delicious food. As you were eating, you suddenly heard the sound of a wailing and whining baby coming from the table behind you. A guy was trying desperately to comfort the baby, but the baby was only becoming more distressed and loud. You could feel your blood pressure rising, as you grew frustrated at the guy's inability to control the baby.

The child sounded hungry. Despite not being a mom yourself, you well knew how to handle and understand babies.

This guy is gonna get it from me.

You were getting visibly angry, and you turned to the guy and said, "I can't believe you can't handle your own baby!"

The guy, clearly frustrated by the situation and your anger, said, "I'm doing my best, but this baby is just so needy and always crying." The voice had a unique timbre to it, Australian accent rolling out.

You rolled your eyes and said, "You should have thought about that before having a baby. You're the father. Why are you so clueless?"

The guy was now getting annoyed and said, "Not like you're the mother. What's your problem? You should have some empathy."

You continued to bicker with the guy about his inability to handle the baby. The guy was beginning to become defensive, and said, "It's not my baby, it's-"

You became angrier, and said, "How dare you deny your own child?! Who do you think you are?!"

The guy realized that I was under the impression that he was the baby's dad. He smirked slightly in amusement before continuing, "You really don't know who I am?"

I looked at him in confusion and frustration. "And who are you sir?" You took in his features. He seemed tall, around 5'10. Maybe a centimeter or two taller. The guy looked athletic with dark blonde hair. Your eyes raked on him, head to toe. He has a strong jaw and large deep set blue eyes. He has a lean, muscular frame, with well-defined muscles on his arms and shoulders, and strong legs. He definitely wasn't hard on the eyes.

He noticed you eyeing him head-to-toe and smirked in amusement. Looked at you and spoke with slight arrogance. "I'm Oscar Piastri."

"Oscar Pastry? Who the fuck names their son 'Pastry?'"

"Piastri!," he interjected.

"Pastry or whatever, have some shame. You can't handle your own child." You rolled your eyes.

He was amused at your reaction. The fact that you didn't know anything about him made the situation funnier.

The baby started crying louder. As the verbal dispute escalated, other guests in the café began to look at them and whisper to each other. Some of them were trying to suppress their laughter at the sight of the F1 driver and the angry girl.

Oscar stood up from his seat and towered you. He countered, saying, "You think I'm not trying? Try sitting in my place and see how you handle the situation then!"

"If it's gonna shut your mouth then so be it!"

You took the baby in your arms and rocked it slowly.

"Boy or a girl?"

"Girl..." he looked at you wide-eyed. How easily you calmed his niece down. Though he was not ready to tell you right now that it's his niece, not his daughter...

"Name?"

"Ollie."

"Like from Oggy and the Cockroaches?"

"Shut the fuck up." He deadpanned. He looked at his now calm niece. He looked at you being gentle with her. He got weird butterflies seeing you like that. He saw how...motherly you are. Ollie was smiling in your arms and all giggly.

"Milk."

"Huh?" he snapped out of his thoughts.

"Milk, Pastry." You emphasized the stupid nickname to rile him up.

"It's Piastri." he rolled his eyes as he handed a bottle of milk from his backpack. "What's your name?"

"Y/N L/N."

"Ahhh I see...Nice name..." The name rolled off his tongue in a way that you liked.

You rocked Ollie in your arms slowly. Ollie was cooing cutely which made you smile. You fed the infant from the bottle as she peered up at you with her big, doe eyes. Oscar was looking at you in amazement at how easily you calmed his niece. He was smiling slightly at the sight in front of him.

"You know, you'd be a great mother..." he said with a slight chuckle.

"That came outta nowhere," you said. You chuckled in a breath, blushing at the comment. He noticed your flustered expression and smiled. He had a cheeky smile on his face.

"So, what brings you to Monaco?," he asked out of pure curiosity.

"Work," you sighed.

"What do you do for a living?," he asked.

"Software developer. I'm here to present our company's new project to our potential collaborator," you explained. He was listening to you carefully and nodded slightly in respect.

"You're very smart for a pretty girl," he said with a teasing smirk.

"And what does that mean?," you raised an eyebrow. You looked down and saw a now peacefully asleep Ollie in your arms. You carefully took out the bottle of milk from his mouth.

"Just that beauty and brains is a deadly but rare combination," he said with a playful shrug. You snickered.

"Pacifier." You extended your hand towards him to take the pacifier he'd hand you.

"You're a natural at this stuff," he muttered softly.

"Okay okay I get it. What do you do for a living though?"

"Wait— you don't know?" Oscar was genuinely surprised that you didn't know who he was. He was pretty famous after all, but you seemed to be completely oblivious.

"Am I supposed to know ya?" You scratched your head in confusion. He chuckled at your lack of knowledge on this.

"I'll give you a hint. I drive in weird shapes for living." He grinned as he waited for an answer.

"Drive in weird shapes?" You started pondering.

Well, he said weird shapes. Driving, the roads aren't of a specific shape so...

"You're a taxi driver?"

"What the—" He burst out laughing at your answer.

"What? Did I get it wrong?" Your cheeks flushed pink, a hint of embarrassment creeping up.

"You said you drive in weird shapes and roads aren't exactly always straight so I assumed..."

"Search my name, dummy." He had a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Uhm...sure?" You rolled your eyes and took out your phone. You typed with one hand while rocking Ollie in your arms. Surely he isn't any hotshot, right? Your eyes widened at the search results.

"Okay. No words." Your eyes darted from the pictures on your phone and him, your mind processing he was a Formula 1 driver and you had no idea all this time.

"Surprise sweetie." He ran his fingers through his head. Your eyes went on the first picture that popped up. A race win in Hungary...

"You still can't babysit your daughter." You retorted to mask the surprise on you face.

But Google didn't show any wife or girlfriend or children on his profile. Where'd he even get this girl from?

"Sorry to break your little bubble but that's my niece. I'm no father." He chuckled.

"No wonder. I thought google was inaccurate." I nodded slowly. But I immediately bit back. "Still can't babysit to save your life."

"So what a man gotta do?" Oscar asked with a grin.

You chuckled exasperatedly and shook your head. "So, when do I teach?"

"Come to Australia sometime." He smiled.

Can't believe I'm gonna have to teach a world-class Formula 1 driver on how to babysit his niece.

..................................................................................................................

IN HONOUR OF THE GREAT OSC PASTRY WINNING THE HUNGARIAN GRAND PRIX WITH A BROKEN RIB (ill pretend like it wasn't a maiden win and he lost the thrill of winning himself 😔💔) I had this in my drafts for a good amount time 😭 here's when I serve 😋

[lowkeyremi]

Choso who went into battle not knowing if he'd ever see you again. You knew this as well as he did, but he didn't want you to worry so he tried to comfort your mind.

"When I get back you gotta make me one of those cakes with the strawberries in it. I'll be thinking about it the whole time." He's hugging you, your head resting on his chest, tears from your leaky eyes stain his shirt.

"Don't go." Is all you can say. For some reason your heart is telling you that this is the last time you'll ever see your husband. This isn't just an assumption either, it's a very, very strong feeling inside of you.

"Baby. You know I have to.." His cold hands rub up and down your back, the coldness reminds of you of death.

"But.. what if this is our last time together?" He freezes completely, even his breath stops for a few seconds.

"I promise you, honey, this will not be our last time together." Choso leans down to meet your lips in a kiss, this kiss held so much slow, raw emotion. His hands caressed the back of your head and you felt more tears roll down your face.

"Choso! We gotta get goin'!" Yuki says tapping her foot impatiently. You have nothing against Yuki, but at that moment so much hate builds up inside of you- she's trying to take him away from you. She's trying to bring him closer to death.

"Choso please..." It's desperate and whiny, your voice cracks upon the last syllable. He gives you one last tight squeeze before muttering a, "I'll see you later baby."

The worst part about the departure is he doesn't look back, but you don't blame him. If he had looked back at your weepy eyes, he probably would have stayed instead of fighting for Japan.

Over the months of his absence you grow bitter, hateful, and quiet. Rarely do you talk anymore so when you hear your own voice it sounds foreign. Even your closest friends can't bring you out of the house without you bursting into tears, because the same door you walk out of is the same door he left out of.

"[name] you have to get out of here, you're going to spiral sooner or later," Your best friend mutters for the nth time.

"I'M NOT LEAVING! THIS IS ALL I HAVE LEFT!" You scream out. Regret instantly washes over you. "I'm-"

"I know you're hurting, don't worry about it." They say in a calming manner.

"I just- it's been two weeks since he's called me. Two. Weeks." Your best friend joins you on your couch, the same couch you and your husband have had many movie nights on.

"I know you're worried, [name]. About him, about your future, about everything... and I'm not going to tell you to be optimistic about the whole thing because it's 50/50 but I do want you to stay strong. It's what your husband would want, right?" They're right, if Choso were here he would tell you to push through and stay strong like you always do.

"Okay- fuck- alright. I'll go put some different clothes, let's get out of here. I haven't left in a long time."

The call came a month later. It was Yaga, he didn't sugar coat it, not that you wanted him to anyway.

"I'm sorry for your loss." It hurts when you hear those words being said to you over the phone. Your ears get a fuzzy feeling your vision blurs, and you start to hyperventilate.

"[name]? [name] are you there?" Everything went dark after that.

Trying to cope was the worst part of it all. Yaga had called you a couple of weeks later saying his body was so mutilated that they couldn't bring it back to bury him properly.

Now, you truly have nothing left, well, technically you have all the things he's given to you over the years, but you don't have him.

You went to therapy, you went to stay with your family, none of it worked. All you could think about was the last time he held you, his body was warm but his hands were cold to the touch.

As much as it hurts, your therapist has suggested moving out of your house because your pain is still raw and being in the house will bring up painful memories. Of course you refuse, why is everyone trying to take away what you have left of your husband?

In your bed was a picture of Choso, one you'd always keep with you when you missed him horribly. As you lie down for the night, you hug the picture tightly while tears silently fall from your eyes. At this point you don't even make sound anymore when you cry, it's just tears.

Ultimately, Yuji was the one to help you start your healing process. When everything had faded he came back, in rough shape might you add, but at least he was back. Instead of going to see all his friends when he returns, he goes to see you.

When he knocks on your door you assume it's your friends or a family member coming to get you out of the house. Seeing Yuji at your front door was very unexpected on your part. Before you can even get a sentence out he's squeezing you in a bone crushing hug.

"Choso told me to give you a hug for him. It was the last thing he asked for." His softly spoken words meet your ears. Almost immediately you squeezed Yuji tighter, "Thank you ,Yuji..."

"I know that you've known him longer than I have but.." he pauses, "his death hurt me just as much, and shit- I'm not gonna lie and say everything will be okay or everything will go back to normal, but I will say that he wants us to continue on even when it's rough."

Yuji's words sink into your brain and your first thought is selfish 'he wouldn't want me to keep going without him'. After a few seconds of rethinking you agree with Yuji, Choso was a fighter and he pressed on for what he believed, and yes, he would want you and his brother to do the same.

[loud-sturniolos]

Gender reveal

A dad!Chris Sturniolo fanfic

SUMMARY:

Intimate gender reveal between Chris, you, Matt and Nick.

WARNINGS:

Fluff, swearing, dad!Chris, kinda short, not proofread, kinda shit I’m half asleep😭

A/N:: I am redoing my tag list + Gonna post a bit more! Comment if you want to be added^^

You heard the front door open, and immediately knew Chris and his brothers were home. You stood up off the sofa, and smiled when Chris, Matt and Nick walked in, each with 2 full bags from Target. Chris walked over and kissed your cheek, then crouched down to press a kiss to your baby bump, “How’s my special little man doing?” You looked down at him, letting out a small laugh. “The baby is fine, and you dont know if it’s a boy yet.” You tease, ruffling his hair before walking towards the kitchen where Nick and Matt had started unpacking the bags, Chris trailing behind quickly.

“Did you get the plain cupcakes?” “Yes.” “And both blue and pink frosting?” “Yep.” “And the-“ “We got everything you asked for. Calm down.” You shrugged and grabbed the bag of chips, opening them and popping one into your mouth. “Just gotta make sure.” Chris reached over, trying to sneak a chip, but you batted his hand away before he could. “Hey, that’s not nice. Let me have one, ma.” He said, putting on a fake pout. “No, get your own.” “And don’t pout, you’re not 3, Chris.” Nick added on, not-so kindly.

An hour later, everything was set up for the small gender reveal. A small arch of blue and pink balloons, the gender reveal cake, and extra cupcakes decorated in either pink or blue.

You felt Chris walk up behind you, his arms wrapping around your waist and his hands splaying across the baby bump through your clothes. “Lookin’ good, ma.” He said softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Me, or the decorations?” You teased, “Both.” Chris said against your head, you could practically hear his grin. Chris gestured to the cupcakes, “Can I try one?” “Fine. Just one.” You giggled as he immediately grabbed a boy-themed cupcake and started eating it.

Matt and Nick walked over, each with grins on their faces. “We doing this now, or what?” Nick asked, you responded by pointing at Chris, who was still shoving cake down his throat, “Once he’s finished his cupcake.” Matt let out a small chuckle, leaning against the wall and taking a photo of the table of cupcakes and the balloon arch to post on his friends-only.

After Chris finally finished his cupcake and washed it down with a Pepsi, he was stood next to the cake, trying to figure out how to cut it. “Chris, dude, just cut the cake.” “No, I don’t want to ruin the decoration.” He says firmly, he finally finds a safe place to cut the cake without ruining any of the decor. He lines up the knife, then slowly cuts the cake in half. He stares at the cut cake for a moment, holding his breath as he slowly pushes the halves apart to reveal a pale blue cake. Chris lets out a soft gasp, immediately spinning to face you. “I.. it’s a boy??” You nod in response, a huge smile on your face, then as Chris runs over and engulfs you in a bear hug you let out a squeal.

After a long, tight, 5 minute hug from Chris, he finally lets go and allows Nick and Matt to hug you. “You got name ideas yet?” Nick asks curiously as he pulls away from your guys’ hug, his hands staying firmly on your biceps. “No, no names yet, Nick.” You replied, slightly amused. “Okay, well, if you need name ideas just come to me.” “Absolutely not. Babe, do not go to Nick; he’ll probably say some name off RuPaul.” Chris says with a blank, firm look. You giggled and rolled your eyes playfully, “Alright, alright. Wont go to Nick for name ideas.” “Good.”

[fairlyang]

Dessert🕷️

w/c: 1030

pairing: bf!miguel o’hara x f!reader

tags: 18+ smut. baking for him, but he has a different plan, cunnilingus, eating out from behind, fingering, not listening to him, orgasm denial

kinktober masterlist | main masterlist

imagine one random day you decided to bake a cake for your boyfriend miguel before he came over. it was meant to be a movie night with wine and popcorn but you were in the mood for something sweet.

as you were pouring in the ingredients into a bowl you heard the front door open. miguel came in, walking in to the kitchen and straight to you. you turned your head to look at him and give him a peck on the lips as he wrapped his arms around you.

you pulled away after a few seconds and turned back to the cake mix, “missed you baby.” he murmured into your ear and let his hands squeeze you.

"you came home so early! was hoping i'd have time to bake the cake before you got here." you say with a pout while he just chuckles and brings his hands up to grope your tits.

"it's okay baby, think i have another idea for dessert…" he whispers and squeezes your tits gently.

“mig you just got here-“ you start to say but he cuts you off, “and i’ve missed you dearly, so please..”

he then lets you go and you hear shuffling as you poured in the last bit of oil into the bowl. you then felt his hands on your waist and making you bend over the counter with your ass sticking out. he drops to his knees and pulls your cute pink dress over your ass and smiles at the sight, “wore these and trying to play innocent huh?” he teased, making you roll your eyes.

“well i thought we would after you ate something not as soon as you got home.” you muttered and he laughs.

his hands grab the tiny band of your thong and brings it down, “well change of plans sweetheart, don’t worry though i’ll be eating something.”

“fucking perv.” you utter under your breath when you suddenly feel his tongue on your clit. 

he didn’t respond and instead flicked your clit with the tip of his tongue then licking all the way down. he teased your entrance for a few seconds then pulled away just to spit on it, "you fucking love it." he murmured and went right back in.

you moaned and felt your legs shake as he lapped at your folds, his hand spreading your ass so he can eat you out properly. you grabbed onto the whisk and started to mix everything together, already assuming he would be on your ass if you don't do your part.

you attempted to stay concentrated but he was making it hard for you on purpose. it was bad enough he fucking loved eating pussy but add along that he knows how to use his mouth and that he’s physically hungry — you were really in for it.

dinner was finished cooking long ago, covered up on the stove to keep warm awaiting for his arrival but he could never be blamed for wanting a little dessert beforehand.

you leaned over the counter, trusting your legs wouldn’t fail you as you watched the yellow cake mix become a nice blend of what’s its meant to be. you went around the edges of the bowl and making sure everything was going in and no dry parts would be left.

that’s when miguel decided he wasn’t hearing you too well and had to slide a finger inside to change that. you let out a sweet whimper and he quickly pulled it out just to slip two fingers in instead. he pulled away from your clit and took a deep breath, “too fucking sweet baby.”

“fuck- feels so good mig-“ you breathed out and stopped your movements, letting the whisk sink into the bowl.

“that doesn’t mean stop, c’mon gotta keep going or no orgasm.” he says, earning himself an annoyed groan from you.

“that’s just cruel.” you whined and he chuckled.

“i think it’s fair, just gotta be a good girl and finish that cake for me..” he murmurs and pumps his fingers deeper inside you making you moan again.

you picked the whisk up again and started stirring more, going in the middle because it’s not like he’d know when it’s done. nor would he make you put it in the oven, it’d be too dangerous.

he was bluffing.

so you held on to the counter with one hand and barely stirring with the other as he was sucking on your clit again while setting a fast pace with his fingers. “fuck baby- just like that!” you moaned and closed your eyes.

his hearing was focused on the noises of your arousal but he was still able to hyperfocus on whether or not you were still making the cake. if you didn’t change your own pace, he’d have to change his plans for you.

he let it fly by for a few minutes because he felt like being nice but now that he was fucking you harder at his fast pace, he knew you were getting close. he knew your body too well.

you had let go of the whisk, hell even pushed the fucking bowl to the side and just held on tightly as you grind your hips back and forth against his face.

for the most part he didn’t mind, that was until he felt your walls clenching against his fingers and he couldn’t have that.

your orgasm was just out of reach, you could feel it about to hit you like a tidal wave — legs already shaking and your eyes fluttering. you were letting out the sweetest fucking whimpers, they made his cock twitch, “oh fuck- baby i’m gonna-“

and the second it was about to hit, he pulled his fingers out and pulled away from your clit making you gasp, “what the fuck-“

“we had a deal princess… it’s really too bad, i wanted a slice of that cake..” he says, standing up and helping you straighten up.

“you sick fuck-“ you spit, beyond annoyed.

“i’ll make it up to you after i shower…” he mumbles into your ear, “and when the cake is baked…” he says stifling a laugh making you moan.

[aestheticaltcow]

Drunken Escapades

Carmen "Carmy" Berzatto x Reader

This was a request from about 3ish months ago.

It turns out you met Mikey before he passed; you just didn't know it.

The Bear Masterlist

“Top you off?” Syd asked after she’d refilled her wine glass. You shook your head, “If I do more than a glass and a half, I get…messy.” you excused, the casual atmosphere making you feel at ease.

Carmy laughed from the kitchen, making you roll your eyes. “Is there a fun New York story here?” Syd asked as Carmy and Richie joined the women at Syd’s cramped table. Richie sat across from you and nudged his chin up in your direction. “What’s the story, sweetheart?” he laughed.

You scratched the back of your head as Carmy put an arm over your shoulders and flashed a shit-eating grin in your direction, “Tell’em the story of how we met, baby. It’s a good, what do they call it…”

“Carmy, it’s a lot of things, but I would never refer to it as a meet-cute,” you laughed. Syd looked between the two of you. Over the past few months, you and she had become pretty good friends, bonding over the mutual frustrations of knowing Carmen Berzatto. But you still had your secrets. “I was a different girl back then- a little wilder; Carmy has grounded me quite a bit.”

“Well, now we gotta know!” Richie cackled as he gestured to Syd, trying to egg her into getting you to confess the story. Syd rolled her eyes and shrugged, “I’m curious, but it’s your story-”

 “Okay-Okay, fine,” you said, the anticipation in the air palpable as you laughed defensively, staring at the table. Carmy squeezed your shoulder, “It’s okay, baby. It can stay our dirty secret.” he assured you. You groaned and let your head fall back before sitting up straighter, “Okay. So imagine with me here. I’m at this bar with my friends for a girls' night out. Of course, they all ditched me over the course of about an hour, so I sat at the bar by myself. I get shit-faced- that’s beside the point. I get up to go to the bathroom, only to fuckin’ body this man.”

“Carmy? I can’t imagine that child in a bar.” Richie’s laughter interrupted your story. Carmy rolled his eyes, “I used to go to bars- but I wasn’t the guy she bodied at the bar.” he clarified before turning his attention back to you. 

“It was his friend Morgan Tylers- you know, the pastry chef that went crazy viral on Twitter for making those elevated candy bar cakes back in 2020,” you explained, noticing the subtly of Carmy’s jaw flex. He wasn’t necessarily jealous, but hearing about your drunken escapades with other guys wasn’t his favorite thing in the world.

“Anyway, I ended up dangling on him for hours, right, but then I started getting really overstimulated because of the lights in the bar, and I started crying. Morgan got really uncomfortable having a drunk, crying girl sitting on his lap, so he got up, dragged me with him, and causally introduced me to Carmy.” you grinned, “I don’t remember what happened after that, but I may or may not have thrown up on Carmy… twice…” you wiped your nose with the back of your hand as you tried to hide your embarrassment. 

“She did. I made sure she got home safe, and three years later, here we are.” Carmy concluded, pulling you closer to kiss your temple. “Ew Carmy, not in my apartment. Com’on.” Syd playfully cringed before polishing off her glass of wine.

“That isn’t even my worst drunk story.” you laughed. “Whats worse than meeting Carmy?” Richie mumbled as he finished off his drink. Carmy rolled his eyes and reached over to shove him, “Fuck off, jackass.”

“What’s the story?” Syd cautiously asked. You shook your head and tucked your loose bangs behind your ear. “Oh, if you thought throwing up on Carmy twice was bad, this one is worse.” you started.

“2016. Riot Fest. During Rob Zombie’s set on Sunday, I met this guy- we were making out on the outskirts of the crowd. I don’t know what triggered it, but I threw up… in his mouth. And then again on myself… and him a little bit more. I ran away because I was so fucking embarrassed. It was a low point in my life.” you begrudgingly admitted.

Richie looked between you and Carmy as his jaw went slack, “Holy shit, you’re puke girl.” he chuckled as he leaned back in his chair. You shot him a confused look, encouraging him to continue. “You were makin’ out with Mikey.” 

“Wait. Mikey, as in Mikey-Mikey?” you questioned. Richie nodded as he ran his tongue across his top row of teeth. “Yeah, Chi-Chi got a hook-up for tickets, so we all went. Mikey went off to do god knows what, and when we found him again, he was absolutely covered in puke. He said he was gettin’ to second base with this girl, but then she puked on him.” Richie awkwardly explained as he fidgeted with the paper towel he’d used as a napkin. 

You looked at Carmy, who’d gone pale. He nodded, and an awkward silence took over the room. You chuckled, “I guess I just have to puke on Natalie now…”  Syd erupted in laughter. She quickly apologized, but the laughter had become contagious. Richie started laughing, too. Carmy shook his head and playfully pushed you, “I swear. I can’t take you anywhere.”

[munson-blurbs]

Inspired by this TikTok. Thank you to @lesservillain for the idea and to @emsgoodthinkin for brainstorming with me!

Summary: Eddie jumpscares you one too many times, and so you decide to freak him out at work. But who will be more shocked: him, or you?

Warnings: fem!reader, friends-to-lovers, idiots in love, brief description of (fake) gore, joke about throwing up (doesn't actually happen), kissing as a joke (please only kiss w/ consent irl)

WC: 1.3k

It was just a joke. 

A joke that had started when Eddie had barged into your house—the man wouldn’t knock if his life depended on it—and proudly announced, “I got the job!”

The job in question was a haunted house performer at Hawkins’ annual Fall Festival. You’d both been going since you were kids, and his favorite part had always been the haunted house. 

He’d gotten word about his new job in early September. By mid-October, you’re fully sick and tired of his antics. 

“Boo!” he’d yelled as he jumped out from behind the Wheeler’s couch, making you leap out of your seat. 

“Raaahhh!” he’d growled in your ear while you were in the midst of a conversation with Robin, and once your heartbeat returned to normal, you flipped him off. 

His enthusiastic “Gotcha!” during your history quiz was the final straw. You’d yelped, actually shrieked in the middle of class, clapping a hand over your mouth as Mrs. Click glared at you. 

“I’m gonna get you back for that,” you’d hissed once you’d turned in your exam, growing more irritated when he’d just shook his head. 

“You can’t scare me,” he retorted with a smirk, leaning up against a locker. “You’ve never been able to freak me out, and you never will. Don’t even try, little girl.”

Challenge accepted. 

You spend the rest of the week wracking your brain for ideas. What is Eddie Munson afraid of? What will shock him?

The obvious answer is hiding a prized possession and making him think it was stolen or lost. You grin to yourself as you picture him frantically searching for Sweetheart; maybe you could leave a ransom note of sorts. 

But that plan has too many moving pieces, so you scrap it. You’re about to give up entirely when Robin inadvertently gives you an idea. 

“You guys coming to Steve’s party tomorrow?” she asks in between bites of her turkey sandwich. 

“I’m down,” you eagerly agree, itching to have a night out with friends. 

When Robin turns to Eddie, he shakes his head. “Gotta work,” he reminds her, wiggling his fingers to emphasize the spooky nature of his job. 

Robin rolls her eyes. “Fine, okay. Stop by after. I promise we won’t make you play spin the bottle again.”

Eddie’s eyes widen, cheeks redden, and he gets up from the lunch table without another word. 

Bingo. 

The plan is set: on Friday, before Steve’s party, you’ll pay Eddie a visit at the Fall Festival. It’ll be a visit he’ll never forget, you’re sure of that. 

Robin stands with you outside the haunted house, picking at a funnel cake with powdered sugar-coated fingers. “I’ll wait out here,” she promises, “but when you’re done, I wanna hear everything. Especially the look on his face.”

“You got it.” You shoot her a thumb’s up as you jog up to the bored-looking attendant taking tickets. 

You’re in. 

The first room just sets the tone. Eerie organ music pulses through an ancient sound system, and a fog machine creates a steam that prevents you from seeing the floor. Cobwebs hang in the corners of the ceiling, though you’re suspicious that they’re not intentional decorations. 

Eddie’s not in the next room, either; just a woman wearing a blood-spattered wedding dress, wielding a knife and clutching a plastic severed head. She’s screaming something about, “teaching him not to cheat with a bridesmaid,” and looks vaguely annoyed that you’re not quaking with terror. 

You go through three more rooms, getting increasingly irritating with the lack of Eddie in each one. He’s working tonight, so he has to be here—

Loud, stomping footsteps follow you into the dungeon-themed section of the house, and your heart skips a beat as you lay eyes on him. A distorted mask covers his face, but his unruly curls give him away despite the mad scientist costume he’s donning. He holds up a knife and creeps closer, a low growl emanating from his throat. You run until you no longer can, and he easily traps you, the cold metal gate pressing into your back. 

If you’re going to do it, now’s your chance. 

In one swift motion, you turn him so he’s backed up into the gate. A soft, confused “wha—?” leaves his lips as you lift his mask and lean in before you lose your nerve. Your lips press against his; hands on his cheeks as he accepts the way you melt into him.

Why isn’t he pulling away? Why isn’t he laughing and appreciating your prank? Why does it seem like he wants this…like he’s BEEN wanting this?

Fuck. Fuck. 

This isn’t what you were expecting. He’s kissing you back, surprised but hungry, and you’re the one who ends up breaking away. 

Before he can begin to question what’s happening, you dash out of the room. No. No, no, no. Your head spins as you attempt to process the emotions pulsing through your veins. 

It was supposed to be a way of getting him back for his unwavering desire to scare you. Show him what it’s like to be the one on the other side of the joke. Because that’s all it was; a joke. 

So why do you want to kiss him again?

Fresh air hits you like a slap in the face, and once you find Robin, you cling to her like a lifeline. 

“We have to go,” you mumble, dragging her to the exit and refusing to make eye contact. 

“Whoa, what happened?” When you refuse to answer, she sighs but doesn’t relent. “C’mon, did he, like, throw up or something?”

You shake your head. “I think he liked it.”

“Of course he did,” she says with a laugh, “the guy’s in love with you.” She nudges your hip with her own. “Toldja he would lose his shit.”

Your mouth goes dry. “Robs…when I said that I wanted him to ‘freak out,’ what did you think I meant?”

Robin crinkles her nose. “Um, that the Dingus-ette—that’s you—and her doting Dingus were finally going to admit that they have big, stupid crushes on each other?” Her expression falters when you stop in your tracks. “What did you mean?”

“I wanted,” you start, swallowing hard like a gob of peanut butter is stuck to the roof of your mouth, “I wanted to get him back for scaring me. I wanted to freak him out.”

“Mission accomplished.”

She’s no longer looking at you when she speaks, and you follow her gaze to where Eddie’s shuffling over to you. You want to beg her to stay, but she just squeezes your hand in a silent good luck. 

“Hi.” Eddie’s voice is uncharacteristically quiet. “Can we talk?”

You can only nod in response. His mask is atop his mess of curls, and you can see the longing in his eyes. How have you never noticed it before? How did you not notice the need within yourself?

“Actually, I’m lying. I don’t want to talk.” With that, his arms pull you into him, torsos pressed together, and he’s kissing you. It’s like a missing link in a chain you hadn’t realized was broken, and you allow your hands to drape over his shoulders. You can feel him trembling slightly as he deepens the kiss. 

“You okay?” you murmur against his lips. 

“Huh? Oh, yeah,” he answers, ducking his head behind his curtain of hair. “Guess ‘m just a little freaked out that this is really happening.”

A smile twitches at the corners of your mouth, and you lace your fingers with his. 

“Good.”

--

[obsessedwithtoomanythings]

Sweet Tooth (NSFW)

Pairing: Leon Kennedy x Reader

Warnings: smut, dirty talk, he absolutely is all over her, jokes about breeding and pregnancy, talk of oral (f receiving), Leon’s fingers go places, swearing probably.

Words: 530 (v short, I just wanted to get SOMETHING out for you guys)

A/N: So I saw these Eating HCs today for Leon from @ichigo-dream and I was obsessed. I didn’t have a whole lot of time as most of my writing power has been dedicated to 3 fics I am SO excited about; but yeah! A lil something!

Also my requests are open, it may just take some time for me to get to things! ❤️

*gif not mine. Found on Tenor*

Days like these? These are the best kinds of days. Leon’s home, wrapped up in some kind of paperwork on the couch, but he’s home. I pull the tray of cupcakes out of the oven, dreading frosting them for this stupid party my cousin was hosting. Thankfully, I don’t have to stay at said party, but having to make 4 dozen cupcakes all within a few hours is frustrating to say the least.

“Ah no!” I yell as I turn to see Leon eyeballing one of the cupcakes. “Absolutely not!”

“Why? Just one?” He pleads, a slight pout on his gorgeous features and I roll my eyes.

“Sorry babe, but I am only making enough to send with Kim.” It may have been a bit mean to only make enough for what she needs, knowing about the agent’s overwhelming sweet tooth, but it honestly slipped my mind when I started them this morning. I turn to grab the piping bag when I hear a low whistle from Leon. “What’s up, agent?”

“I didn’t know you owned shorts like that.” When I finally look back over my shoulder, his blue eyes are locked on my ass, the bottoms of my cheeks spilling out of the bottom.

“They’re just at-home-shorts. Not like I wear them anywhere.” Do not tell him what your best friend dubbed these shorts. I begin piping green frosting onto the soft cake, but as soon as I lift the tool away, a hand slaps quickly over my ass and I gasp. Leon’s strong arms wrap around my waist, tugging me against what I can tell is a speedily rising erection.

“You gotta change outta those shorts, Princess, or they’ll be around your ankles by lunch.” His husky tone sends a chill down my spine as my back arches on it’s own accord, his hot breath tickling my ear.

“Don’t you have work to do?” I tease, trying to draw his attention elsewhere.

“I did. But then I smelt something sweet in here that I’m apparently not allowed to have.” Soft lips pepper kisses along the column of my throat before his teeth lightly sink into the flesh. “So I need to find another snack.”

“Leon, baby, I only have a couple more hours to finish these,” I argue, but it’s no use, his fingers sliding into the elastic band of the shorts and pushing them to the ground. Wrapped around my ankles.

“Well, maybe my girl should have thought about that before she went teasing me with these sexy little shorts.” He presses his hand down to cup my sex through my panties before he clearly has a realization. “Wait, are these the shorts your friend called the ‘get me pregnant’ shorts?” My cheeks heat up as two of his fingers rub teasing circles over my clit through my panties.

“It was a joke, babe,” I mutter, head dropping back to rest on his shoulder at the stimulation.

“Well, joke or not, now you have a choice.” Oh god, what is this little shit planning? “You can let me ‘get you pregnant’ or you can let me get my sugar fill by letting me eat this sweet little pussy.”

Fuck. Tough choices.

*****

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Leon: @house-of-kolchek @bonnibuckets @athanasia-day @muffimtv

Everything: @chaosandbubbles @kassiekolchek22