#I forgot that 1. Children are always stronger than they look | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

onsunnyside · 3 years ago

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ʚ♰ɞ 𝟐. 𝐎𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 | friends-with-benefits!Ransom Drysdale x camgirl!reader, dad's best friend!Chris Evans x camgirl!reader, camgirl!Natasha Romanoff x camgirl!reader (mentioned, just for shows and not romantically)

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 | fluff, AGE GAP, SMUT - minors DNI, best friend!Natasha, dilf!Chris Evans (he's also very wealthy), sexting, FaceTime sex (starts, then is implied), dirty talk, daddy kink, fingering, grinding, camming: mentioned, sub!reader, masturbation.

𝗪/𝗖 | 6K

𝗔/𝗡 | oh my goodness, I took a nap and just woke up, so here's the next chapter of holy grail and thank you for your patience while I slept the evening away. also i needed a blond mcu character to be reader’s dad’s fiancee, it’s Carol. this chapter has been split into two parts because I use a lot of page breaks !! next part comes tmrw at 6pm EST. No gifs/photos belong to me, found bottom ones on Pinterest [1 | 2 | 3] all credits go to the original creators.

˗ˏˋ𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭ˎˊ˗ ⋰˚ 𝐂.𝐄. & 𝐂𝐨. 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

“Have you seen my black bikini? I can’t find it.”

“Didn’t you wear it to that yacht party Ransom dragged you to?”

Of fucking course.

You groan and nearly stomp your feet in frustration. As if on cue, your phone starts ringing and that devil’s name flashes on the screen. Ignoring the call, you collapse onto Wanda’s bed with your arms over your eyes.

“I’m going to lie in the middle of a bike lane and wait to get run over by a cyclist.”

Wanda laughs, almost ruining her lipstick as she applies it in the mirror. “Shouldn’t you be packing for your trip?”

You scoff loudly. It wasn’t a trip, more like a forceful gathering to meet your father’s new fiancée. You’ve lost count on how many women you’ve seen hanging off his arm, wearing a shiny diamond ring on their left hand.

The last one was ten years younger than him and invited you to get lunch with her and her other friends. Against your will, you went because your father played the “You’ll be calling her mom soon” card. You almost laughed in his face right then, as if he forgot about his past stream of ex-fiancée's who came and left faster than a bolt of lightning.

It was pitiful. Your father has been desperate since your mother left him for another man long ago, but you can’t blame him. You haven’t spoken to her in years, not since you graduated high school. You’ve never forgiven her for cheating with her co-worker—even though now they’re both happily married, living with his children from a previous relationship.

While you took your heartbreak and pushed yourself into school and work, your dad set off on serial dating but, thankfully, did not have any more kids.

“I’m so glad Nat’s coming along—I would’ve faked being sick if she wasn’t.” You’ve always had a hard time telling your father no, but the relationship between the two of you was far stronger than the one you had with your mother. After the divorce, you chose to live with your father instead of your mother and her new husband. “I swear, when I finally find the guts, I’ll say no.”

“But not any time soon.” Wanda fills in, looking over her shoulder at you. Her eyes are lined with silver glitter, matching the simple jewelry around her neck and wrists. “Do you know why?”

“I love him too much?”

Your roommate shrugs, “Well, yeah but you also love to ogle at his friend.”

Your jaw drops and you grab a piece of clothing lying on her bed to throw at her, missing by a few feet.

Wanda flips her hair smugly, “I don’t blame you, if I wasn’t with Vis, I’d drag you by your ear to your dad's trip. I still remember when he had that layover and stayed in a hotel, and came by when we were having a girl's night. Men who aren’t afraid of face masks, self-care, and pedicures are my kind of men—ugh, some guys our age avoid soap like the plague.” She goes on a rant about her past failed relationships, all of which you were a witness to the garbage fire, until Vis, an older philosophy major came along.

You try to listen to her, but your mind is filled with memories from your last trip home. As Wanda loudly shuffles through her makeup, rambling about another jerk, “He left his pubic hair all over the bathroom as if he hadn’t ever cleaned—I still have flashbacks.”

Humming absentmindedly, you fall deeper into your head.

Lately, you have been far too busy to do an actual stream. Only posting photos and short videos for your fans—so thinking about that man wasn’t the best idea. Especially since you just showered.

But, how could you stop thinking about him?

He was older than you, almost double your age and he was best friends with your father.

Chris was wealthy—with a family name that will be old money rich down the line. He spent his life getting everything he wanted, but he never lost touch with his humanity. Always a humble man, he’s helped friends and family whenever they needed it and even funded one of your high school trips to Europe. And he definitely wasn’t terrible looking—hell, he wasn’t even average, he was beyond it.

Naturally gifted with looks that could melt anyone. Brown hair that was always flawless, either styled, in a fluffy mess or covered by a baseball cap. Perfect facial hair over his chiselled cheekbones and strong jaw. A prominent nose and freckles. Dark eyebrows, thick eyelashes and most notably, his clear blue eyes that sucked you in with a single glance.

And his body, you remember when you excused yourself and to change your panties. Watching him strut around, shirtless with all his tattoos exposed and drinking a beer, had affected you so deeply, you had soaked straight through the cotton.

You also ended up taking the opportunity to film a little video of yourself in your bedroom. Then, you posted it along with a promise of doing more that night and warning your fans that you’d have to be quiet. A lot of them liked when you had to silence yourself and so did you. Just the possibility of getting caught if you were too loud.

For the rest of that trip, Chris was very friendly with you. More than usual. You’ve caught him staring at you plenty of times, just the weight of his gaze sent goosebumps all over your body.

It picked up from there. The stares turned into winks and sly smiles, he’d raise his beer to his mouth and take a hearty gulp, drops slipping from the corners of his lips before he’d lick them away. Sometimes he’d make a show of it and collect the droplets with his finger before suckling them clean.

At first, it was hard to consider that Chris was attracted to you in the way you were to him.

Then, it all solidified on the last day of your trip.

You grew comfortable with his light touches on your hips—those could easily be written off as merely platonic affection. Then, you hit a stump.

When no one else is around, he comes up behind you and his big hands massage your shoulders, working out the knots in your neck and back until you are swaying on your feet. Your core feels warm as you can’t help but think about what other things his hands were skilled in.

You let out a soft moan as he presses himself against you. His heavy breath ghosting your skin, touch wandering to your waist and down your hips, the tips of his fingers dipping into the band of your shorts.

Your legs tremble as he coos softly, moving your ass over his thickening length—he definitely wasn’t small. His guttural groans harmonize with your quiet whimpers, and you shut your eyes, leaning against him and letting him manhandle your body how he wants.

It feels like a dream come true, because it was.

You grab one of his hands and push it inside your shorts, under your bikini bottoms. “Please.”

Chris’ groans grow in volume as he presses harder, his big cock sliding against your ass. Long fingers gently explore your wet folds, dipping down to your entrance before rubbing your throbbing clit.

“Are you always this wet for me, baby?”

Blissed out, you nod silently.

The distant sound of a door opening and your name being called yanks back to reality. The rush topples over you. But you don’t want it to end, you don’t want him to stop.

But Chris makes the decision himself and pulls away. You whine in protest and he only shushes you.

“Next time.” He kisses the side of your neck then leaves.

After that, you were so worked up. You had to put out the fire he started then abandoned. You ended up in the guest bathroom with your hand stuffed in your shorts, pressed against the wall as you desperately brought yourself to a finish. You didn’t even have time to film it—only posting a picture of yourself and your wetness afterward with a caption:

AngelEyes: I’m sorry I forgot to take a video, daddy! I couldn’t stop after I started, please forgive me :(

When you retrieved your bags from your room, there was a neatly wrapped box on your bed. You didn’t have time to open it and hurriedly stuffed it into your luggage before dashing out the door. Quickly bidding your father and his fiancée goodbye, and kissing Chris on the cheek, as you always have.

Although, this time, you might have kissed a little closer to his lips. From the way his hand drifted to your ass, it was safe to say he had no objections.

The present was unwrapped the moment you stepped foot into your apartment.

It was a skimpy black bikini with more straps than actual coverage, sparkly rhinestones dangling from some hems like water droplets. There wasn’t a note, not even a little hint as to who it was from, but you didn’t need one. You knew exactly who gifted it to you.

Hence, why you’ve been tearing your apartment apart searching for the immodest pieces of fabric.

The same bikini Ransom refuses to give back because “I fucked you while you wore it, that basically makes it my property now.”

“My dad said that Chris offered to host the trip at his new house.”

“Oh, a new one?” Wanda quizzes, “How is that man still single? He’s loaded, funny, intelligent, and clearly isn’t ugly! It doesn’t add up.”

That question has popped into your mind too. Ever since you’ve known Chris, there have been only a few times he’s mentioned seeing someone, but you’ve never met them.

“Maybe he wants to be single.”

“Or, he secretly has an awful attitude, he could be annoyingly jealous, or have deadly morning breath—or, he’s actually an asshole that no one can stand.”

You pout, “Hey, don’t say that.”

Wanda snickers, “Right, I forgot you’re in love with him.”

In love was a stretch, it was more like deep infatuation, making you insanely attracted to him. You still daydream about the time you walked in on him shirtless and playing the piano.

Standing from Wanda’s bed, there are a couple of texts from Ransom, the first one is needy, I miss your body, baby, then they get progressively more Ransom-esque, I know you miss me too, answer your phone before I drive down there.

The very last one has a photo of his crotch, his cock hard under his pants bulging against the zipper.

You text him back:

I just posted on my OF. Use that, idiot.

Ransom: Oh, I did. Then, I scrolled and saw that picture of you in the shower.

A video pops up, the cover is just a black screen, and you click on it without a second thought. A deep groan bursts from your phone along with a low mumble of your name. Wanda yelps, slamming her brush on her dresser and covering her ears. “Don’t watch porn in my presence!”

“I’m sorry!” You rush to the hallway, already answering Ransom’s FaceTime call. You quickly shut your bedroom door, pressing your back against it. Admittedly, you’re a little embarrassed even though Wanda has heard and witnessed worse.

“You’re an asshole, you know that?”

Ransom smirks, face flushed pink. “Yeah, yeah. Now take off your shirt, baby.”

You glance at your bed still scattered with clothes and your luggage lying half-empty on the floor. You have to leave by tonight to make it to Chris’ house in the morning. You and Natasha already booked separate private cabins with beds since the ride would take at least seven hours. You were also planning on sleeping the entire time.

“I still have to pack.”

On your screen, Ransom’s head is thrown back, the veins in his neck prominent as he moans. Only now do you notice he’s shirtless and just out of frame, his arm moves slowly. You know exactly what he’s doing, and it’s starting to affect you too.

His blue eyes are drawn back to you, “Why are you going anyway?” His breath shudders, “You always talk about how you’re fed up with your dad’s dating record. Plus, three days without dick? Baby, you’ll go crazy. That is unless you invite me.”

“I already invited Nat.” You huff.

“Of fucking course.” Ransom growls, “Are you sharing a cabin?”

“No.”

He raises a dark eyebrow, “Then, I can still come.”

“No, you can’t.” You despise how his arm speeds up, the camera pans down to his heaving chest. The muscles contract with every breath. “My dad doesn’t like you.”

“Is this about that daddy thing? I told you to change his contact name.”

That daddy thing was when Ransom tried to send himself a photo from your phone. It was a sneaky picture of you suckling a popsicle, watching television in nothing but his shirt. Thankfully, your legs were shut and you couldn’t see anything except the marks littering your body, ranging from hickeys to bruises from Ransom. He took the photo from the other side of the couch and used your phone since he couldn’t find his. In contrast to the other ones he’s taken of you, it was completely innocent—only if you ignored his text about adding it to the ‘post-sex album’ he has on his cellphone.

When you told your dad it was Ransom, it just hammered the last nail in the coffin for any potential friendship between your father and him.

“I’m not changing my dad’s contact name so you can keep yours.”

Ransom spits in his hand and brings it back down, the camera angled so you get a glimpse of his red shiny tip. He groans, “Why are we both daddy anyway?”

“Because he’s my dad! And you’re you!”

That smug smirk appears once more, “Yeah, baby? I’m your daddy?” He flips the camera to show his fully hard cock, cum leaking down the thick girth that he uses to make the glide smoother. “Are you going to show daddy that pretty cunt? Let me watch you ride your fingers, pretending it’s my cock?”

Seeing his big hand grip his dick and squeezing the base combined with his deep voice—Ransom could get you wet in a matter of moments. It truly wasn’t fair. So, you give in. “Fine, but make it quick.”

His long fingers tighten, “Oh, sweetie, you doubt my abilities. I’ve made you squirt over text, imagine what I could do like this.”

“And here we are, cabin thirteen and fourteen.” You struggle to read your tickets, hands full of your bags. Opening the door to the first room, you sigh in relief and set down your luggage.

“No one told you to overpack.” Your best friend mutters, also carrying one of your bags. She drops it by the door before standing upright, clad in a pair of black jeans and a ripped t-shirt. “Uh… it’s cute, cozy.”

The cabin is quite small and compact. The walls are painted white, the floor is a dark blue carpet. There’s a tiny foldable table in the middle, across from a red futon, currently set up as a couch. You sit down, testing the cushion. It wasn’t soft but it also wasn’t uncomfortable, it would suffice for the seven hours.

Natasha fixes her hair in the mirror on the back of the door, her green eyes meeting your gaze, “We should’ve got the one with bunk beds, those have bathrooms. We’re going to room together over the trip anyway.”

“And because of that, I’d like to rest while I can. If we were sharing, I’d have to watch you perform.” You raise an eyebrow as she sits beside you, her single duffle bag landing on her lap. “I can’t believe you’re doing all that on the train.”

“Oh, like you’re a saint.” She shoves you playfully, the dark sky looms outside the wide window, “As if you didn’t let Ransom finger you in that movie theatre—”

You slap a hand over her mouth as other passengers walk by your opened door, mortified if they heard your loud-mouth friend. “Shut up,” you hiss as she laughs, “remember when you and Banner fooled around in the parking lot of that diner? And Ransom and I didn’t film that. It just—happened.”

“A lot of things tend to just happen when the playboy is around.” She cocks her head, “Did you know he tried to bribe me to cancel on you? He thought you’d beg him to come instead.”

A little stream of glee rushes through you, an easy smile crawling into your face. If you asked him about that, he’d either downright deny and play clueless, or he’d list the reasons why his company would have been better than Natasha’s, continuing to prove his point when the matter is over with. He’s always been like that, shameless and self-assured, with confidence radiating from him like heat from the sun. Ransom was insistent when he wanted something—at least he didn’t show up at the train station.

You subconsciously glance through the window, craning your neck to see the platform and thankfully, it’s empty. “Well, my dad hates him, so I’d end up going alone anyway.” You say just as the announcement sounds for the last passengers to board, signalling everyone else to get settled.

Natasha stands up, “you’re really just sleeping? I’m sure my fans wouldn’t mind the return of the sweet AngelEyes.” She sings songs.

Rolling your eyes, you shake your head. Natasha was a camgirl too, the two of you started around the same time when rent was going up and college was getting rough. After making accounts on Twitter where you posted short clips, risque pictures and truly let your deepest fantasies free, you both took that next step to OnlyFans. From then on, fame has grown exponentially, now being quite popular individually, it felt only right to test a few collaborations.

You’ve done a few shows together, nothing too scandalous or wild, but also nothing you would classify as Safe For Work. Being semi-opposites and best friends, you and Natasha fit seamlessly. You were submissive, soft, and maybe a brat sometimes. Natasha was gifted in a way, she could adjust to whatever people desired, and still have fun. Truly without the roleplay, she was polar of you, the dominatrix of people’s dreams, cunning and tantalizing, mostly clad in dark leather or lace, the BlackWidow with red cherry lips.

“You’re missing out,” She trails off, digging through her bag before whipping out a vibrator. She waves it before your face like a treat to a dog, “When was the last time you got off?”

“Home.” You answer shortly as your phone chimes. It was as if anytime you thought of Ransom, he’d appear like magic.

Natasha’s green eyes narrow slightly, she can always read you easily, “Playboy came over?”

You know that look, you also know you can’t lie to your friend, “no, but we FaceTimed.”

The redhead smirks, “of course, I’m assuming it was farewell, send-off. You know, it seems a little sentimental… Is there anything you’re hiding from me?”

That would be a way out—if you were actually keeping anything from her, but you weren’t. Or at least you desperately hoped. “No. I’ve told you before, there’s nothing.”

She whistles lowly, “An arrangement going on for this long—I’m surprised neither of you has fallen in love yet.” Her gaze locks on you, searing straight through your eyes and into your brain as if she’s trying to read your thoughts. You cower away, actually considering if you’re keeping any secrets you don’t even know about. The final warning for passengers to be settled sounds, and Natasha slinks out to the hall. “I’m just saying—he’s a little obsessed with you.”

You ignore the faint curiosity that blooms in your chest, scoffing loudly instead, “everyone should be anyway.”

Amused, Natasha raises her hands, still holding the sex toy, “I won’t argue with you, babe.” Then, she’s walking away with her bags, her vibrant hair brushing her shoulders.

“Break a leg.” You call, leaning on the frame.

“Oh, we know I like it rough, but not that rough, miss.” She tsks, waving her fingers over her shoulder. “Knock on the wall if someone is coming.” Then, you hear the door slide shut and lock.

You shut your door too, closing the blinds for privacy. You set up the futon to a bed and grab the small pillow and blanket you packed, lying across the cushion on your belly. The train starts moving, slow and steady vibrations rocking you to sleep, your phone dings as you slip away.

Ransom: Have a safe trip, baby. Call me if you need me.

Ransom: Especially if you’re doing a show, I’ll help you prep because daddy always takes care of his girl ;)

The house is in a secluded neighbourhood, halfway up a hill and at the end of a tall winding road. Hints of autumn paint the trees in yellow and red, some specks of orange amongst the branches that loom over the thin street. A light breeze flows through the air as the car pulls up to the black fence, you can’t help but gape at the size of the home.

White with black framed windows, at least two storeys from what you can see, since thick trees sprout from most of the property, offering some privacy for the wide windows. A redstone walkway leads to the large front doors, potted plants scattered on the porch as ivy grows over the side.

After punching in the code, you and Natasha walk through the automatic metal gates. Your luggage rolls along the ground as you spot your father’s car in the driveway.

“Holy shit.” Natasha gapes, “All this space for one guy? There has to be a home cinema, I just know it.”

“Probably, the last house had a fancy library, like from a haunted house or something.”

“Smart, kind, rich, and handsome—I wonder how many people would kill to be in your shoes.” The redhead smiles coyly as you both walk up the steps, “after that incident last time, I hope you stretched in the train, babe.”

You scoff, “shut up—” your jaw snaps shut as the doors swing open, you’re met with your father’s wide grin as he sweeps you into his arms.

Wrapped in his familiar cologne, you return the embrace. “Finally you’re here! We’ve been waiting all day!” He exclaims, pressing kisses along the side of your face, his beard tickles your face.

“It’s only the afternoon, dad.” Your laugh breathlessly as he squeezes you tighter, “Where’s your fiancée?”

Your father pulls away, “She’s still sleeping, that woman can sleep through anything, she’s the heaviest sleeper I know.” He hugs and greets Natasha too, kissing her cheek. “I’m so glad you’re here, you bring out my daughter—she can be so shy sometimes.”

“It’s hard to be completely open with someone who I don’t know.” You frown.

“Yes, yes, I’m sorry, I just want everything to go as smoothly as possible.” He turns to you, that same lovesick glow in his eyes, “I think she’s the one, honey. I haven’t felt this way before.”

You force a smile, meeting Natasha’s eyes over his shoulder as he picks up your bags. While your dad leads you into the giant house, Natasha hooks your elbows together, offering you a few quiet words of understanding.

The interior of the house is a combination of white, black and neutral earth tones. Several doorways veer off into other directions as a grand staircase leads to the second floor, a sunroof allowing a downcast of sunshine. It’s a cozy industrial style with dark wood floors, subtle pipework and contrasting exposed brick walls.

In contrast to Chris’ previous estates, it’s raw—with the caged pendants and expertly repurposed furniture. Most noticeably, the dark round table centered with the beige rug, three fresh bouquets of roses, one of them already in a vase with water.

“Chris went on a run, he should be back soon and he bought these for the both of you.” Your father takes two bunches and hands them to you and Natasha, “He’s nothing if not charming, they’re real too. I’ll bring your bags to your room then find some more vases.”

While Natasha takes a short shower, you unpack your clothes and hang up your dresses. Your father popped back in to fix your bouquets and set them on the desk by the window.

The room was probably almost as big as your apartment. With two queen size beds on parallel walls, a walk-in closet and an ensuite. There was even a small seating room before you entered the rest of the room, fitted with couches, a television and an electric fireplace.

You change into a silk dress that ends at your calves and shrug on a cardigan before leaving the bedroom. As you walk down the hallway, you pass picture frame collages. Most are of Chris and his family around the world, Disneyland and in their other fancy mansions. Others are of Chris and his friends, including your father—one, in particular, is from when they reconnected after years.

Chris and your father were childhood best friends. Growing up in the same neighbourhood and attending school together, you remember your dad talking about the trouble they used to get into until Chris left to study abroad after high school.

They lost touch after that and your parents met, got married and had you. Years fly by, and Chris and your father loosely reconnect. You didn’t formally meet Chris until the summer after graduation.

You had gone with your dad to Chris’ house, one of them anyway—who knew how many properties that man had. First impressions were as good as they could be, Chris was kind, funny, a great host and handsome as hell. Surprisingly, that was when you met your dad’s secret-not-secret girlfriend at the time. Oddly enough she was Chris’ neighbour who met your dad when he was staying over for some old friend bonding. That relationship didn’t last long and neither did the next or the one after.

You wonder if Chris also was tired of your father’s record too, probably, since your father gives the same recycled “I’ve been waiting my whole life for this woman” speech.

Another woman to get to know only for her to disappear and for another one to take her place.

But Chris also cared for your dad, you knew from the friendly encouragement, compassion and concern. If you ever got the confidence to confront your dad, you’d ask Chris to help you.

“Back in high school, I was one of the quiet ones while Chris was practically everyone’s dream.” Your father laughs, hand entwined with the woman beside him, “He was doing it all, sports, student council, drama club.”

The older man laughs, “You make it sound like I was the guy when I was just a dude.”

You’re all seated around the table in Chris’ dining room. Remains of an early dinner spread on the table, courtesy of the personal chef who Chris hired for the day. He and your father planned the three days as a relaxing getaway, blabbering about the hot tub, heated pool and sauna by the home gym, “no need to ask permission—this is your house for your entire stay.”

Tomorrow is a girls trip while the men went on a hike in the neighbouring wilderness. Your father was adamant about you getting close with his new fiancée. A barbeque is planned for the second day, while everyone lounges beside the pool with drinks, soaking up the last bit of sun before fall comes in full force. The final day was free since your train ride is set for that evening and of course, your dad hinted at more quality with his fiancée, but Chris had spoken up too, “The girls might have course work, right? Any big projects coming up?” A clever way to stray the discussion.

Expectedly, he hasn’t said a word about the last trip, or even hinted at it. As if it didn’t even happen, you didn’t blame him. Although, you couldn’t help but admire his tight t-shirt, the material thin enough that you can see the tattoos on his skin, there are more than you remember. While you tried to sort your thoughts, Natasha was a natural conversationalist and got along with everyone, filling in those gaps of silence.

She’s glad to be the buffer after you found out your father’s new fiancee is only a few years older than you.

“I miss the days when we used to wait outside the supermarket, the ice cream truck would go by, it was a family business. Mr. and Mrs. Yan would always give us free cones…”

“Yeah, and you’d chase down every person who accidentally dropped change.” Chris points a finger at your father, “could’ve kept it and used it on the little kiddie rides.”

“That’s adorable.” Across the table, the young woman swoons, leaning her blond head on your father’s shoulder. “You’ve always been a sweet man, huh?”

“And tremendously frugal.” The blue-eyed man turns to you. At the head of the table, Chris sighs, “Your dad still refuses my money—just as he did when we were younger. Do you know I’ve caught him sneakily returning cash in my wallet? Like a little tooth fairy, except he was getting nothing.”

Everyone laughs, you and Natasha included. It’s lighthearted and casual, the plates are clear and the glasses almost empty as the sun begins to set, the rays peeking through the vast windows.

“I don’t want you to think I’m friends with you for your money!”

Chris rolls his eyes playfully, “I know that, you idiot—you’re lucky there are ladies present or I’d throw you into the pool.”

Admittedly, you’ve missed this. You’ve admired the friendship between your father and Chris, genuine and fun-loving, their years of experiences together were evident. Especially since Chris knows just how stingy your father could be. You’ve heard this same conversation a thousand times before, but Natasha hasn’t.

“What do you do?” The redhead asks, slowly sipping her drink. “This house is straight from Architectural Digest.”

“My grandparents own a hotel chain, worldwide and it’s up there with the Marriott and Hilton. I started working for them after college and now I travel around a lot for potential locations. Last week, I was in Miami—”

Your father interrupts, “—and he’s got quite the allowance—”

“—you know I hate that word, it makes me sound like a child.”

“—and his inheritance fuels the bachelor lifestyle. He’s like an older, but matured frat boy.”

Chris sighs, “Ah, frats, I wish I joined one instead of that private school shit—stuff, sorry, ladies.”

You can imagine him as a fratboy with a solo cup, an engaging yet cocky attitude, and being incredibly flirtatious. He already wears plaid, tight henleys, backwards caps, and that chain around his neck. If he shaved, he’d probably look ten years younger.

If you met fratboy Chris in college, you’d let him have you anytime and anywhere—you almost scoff to yourself—as if you wouldn’t let Chris as he is, older, distinguished and assertive, rail you into the next week.

As the memories come flooding back, you clench your thighs. While Natasha chats with your father and his fiancée, Chris catches your stare and licks his plump lips. His eyes trail down your low-cut dress, lingering on your breasts then returning to your face. He winks over his beer bottle.

And just like that, you’ve bitten the bait, and he’s reeling you in.

“How’s school for you both? Work?”

You clear your throat, stumbling over your answer. “We’re good… school is good.”

Natasha, bless her heart, swoops in. “It’s only the beginning of the semester, but I dread when exam season comes up. As for work,” She turns to you with a grin. Oh no, you know that look. “We work together actually.”

Your dad turns to you, his arm around his fiancée as if she would run away. Honestly, you almost want to tell her to run while she can. “You got a job? You didn’t tell me, hun.”

Your hand lands on Natasha’s thigh, squeezing as a silent form of look what you did. “Well, you finally took a vacation and met—her,” what was his fiancée's name? Carol? “I didn’t want to disturb you.”

The older man frowns, reaching over to take your free hand. His warm rough skin against yours as he hesitates, lowering his tone, “Is this about money? I said I’d always support you. Do you need—”

“No, no I just wanted,” You pause, trying to find the right words, “I wanted the responsibility—the work ethic. Skills that can help after I graduate.”

Beside you, Natasha hums in agreement. “She works so hard, to the point where she almost passes out right after a shift, but her customers love her, some even send her gifts.”

Oh god, you wonder if you should’ve just come alone.

Chris props his elbow on the table, blue eyes surveying your face, “Are you sure you’re okay? You know I’m here for you. With help, cash, advice—I’ve got a lot of experience under my belt,” He says slowly, “you know, budgeting and anything…”

You tear your fingers from your father's, taking a large gulp of water. “Yeah, I just wanted the, uh, discipline.”

Your father contemplates for a few moments then nods and launches into a story of his teens when he got his first job at a local retail store. You try to listen, even though you know it like the back of your hand, but you’re compelled to the man across from you. Chris’ dark gaze is set on you, almost pinning you in your chair. He takes a slow sip of his beer, a drop on his lips before he licks it away.

You feel something touch your ankle, trailing up your leg as his hand disappears beneath the table. Your father’s voice blends into background noise as Chris’ muscles flex under his shirt, his jaw clenched tight under his beard.

If someone could read minds, they’d be appalled by his thoughts.

On the walls of his mind are lewd fantasies. They’re all of you. Nude, a sheen of sweat coating your skin as he spits out commands, all of which you follow enthusiastically. Discipline, he knew you liked things a little rough from your shows. He’s witnessed you begging for guidance, and when you got it, you’d either follow them seamlessly or deliberately disobey.

A submissive angel who had a bratty side, with a love for being told what to do, and an even bigger desire to be punished.

His imagination is halted by your father's fiancée.

“My first job was at a juice bar, it was in the park of one of those high-class neighbourhoods. The ones with the fancy fountains and weekly celebrations. In the winter, we served hot chocolate and got off early—which was great because my boyfriend at the time had a job down the pier.” Carol turns to you, “Which was the best, everyone went to the pier, it was much less kept than where I worked. God, I loved the sunset there.”

Your dad smiles, “We always watch the sunset if we can.”

“I can only imagine what it looks like from here, with no big buildings to block the view.”

“Then, let’s head out to the backyard. We can watch the sunset on the deck—which I helped build over the summer.”

Chris kisses his teeth, “I said thank you a million times and tried to pay you—what else do you want, jerk?”

𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: good gosh, I can't wait to share the next part with all of you !! we get to see dbf!chris being filthy and meet a new character (a certain neighbour), jealousy drops by too !

𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞! next part: Feb. 11 @ 6pm EST.

As always, I hope you all enjoyed this and I’d love to hear your thoughts/feedback !! <3

I don’t do taglists anymore. ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐅𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 & 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲: @𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲

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lord-of-gender · 4 years ago

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A Small Problem - Part 1

My version of @deyageka’s Childinnit au. 3145 words

Dream revived Tommy, but there were unforeseen consequences

"Dweam! I hungy," Tommy complained, he had appeared in the cell after getting revived, with almost no memory of his life. And he looked to be only five or six years old.

"Look kid, all I have are potatoes," Dream snapped. He didn't know which was worse, teen Tommy that actively disregarded him and never listened, or toddler Tommy who was just annoying and never stopped complaining.

"No, no poo-tato," he grabbed the potato Dream had handed him and chucked it in the lava. Tommy had been talking with the same mocking tone all week.

"You have got to be kidding me," Dream glared at Tommy, resisting the urge to kill him again, knowing it would be better if he was alive, even in this state.

"La, la, la, I'm singing, I'm like Wilby," Tommy said, knowing perfectly well he was getting on Dream's nerves.

"Oh thank god," Dream said when he heard footsteps echoing over the lava. "Sam! Get this child out of here!"

"Hi Sam!" Tommy yelled, his high pitched voice hardly recognizable by Sam. "You have a funny name! I am looking for Wilbur!"

"T-Tommy?" Sam said, the disbelief clear in his voice. "Tommy go the the corner in the water!"

"Why?" Tommy asked, clearly not getting the urgency of the situation.

"Just do it you child," Dream demanded, pushing Tommy towards the corner of the cell.

"Okee," Tommy made his way over and stood in the water. Within seconds he was on the other side with Sam. "Hallo! Hehe, Techno always says that. Ooh! I'm big and scawy like Techno!"

"I'm so confused, how are you alive, and why are you, younger," Sam said, not expecting a response.

"I dunno," Tommy shrugged and with a huge smirk began running away from Sam. "Weeeee, freedom!"

"Tommy!" Sam ran after him, eventually cornering him as Tommy came up to the other lava. Noticing the kid's fearful and entranced expression as he started at the lava.

"No, lava bad," he muttered, backing away from it, he didn't know why, he just didn't like it. "Where's Wilbur?"

"I don't know, why don't you come with me and we'll find him," Sam reached his hand out for Tommy to take. Eventually he did. Looking between the lava and Tommy, Sam didn't feel right making him go through all the protocol, not like this. So he lead Tommy through the guards' secret passageways until they got to the main entrance of the prison.

"What is this place," Tommy asked, "why is Dweam in there?"

"This is a place where bad people go, and Dream is a very bad man," Sam said, leading him to the lockers. "Go into the chest and give me the card in there."

"Are you going to put Techno in there," Tommy asked, opening the ender chest and pulling out what Sam had told him.

"Not unless I have to," Sam said, the thought had crossed his mind, but if he did attempt to Phil would defend Techno. The two were powerful, but had stayed isolated in the mountains and didn't currently pose a threat.

"Is this all mine," Tommy looked at the contents in the regular chest in wonder.

"Yes, but we can leave it here or I can hold onto it until we figure this out," Sam said, talking about getting Tommy back to his normal age.

"But it's mine," Tommy said, he pulled out the axe and tried swinging it around, but the weight was made for someone bigger and stronger than him so he ended up falling to the ground. "Uh, you have it. Too heavy."

"I'll give it back as soon as you get back to normal," Sam said, ruffling Tommy's hair as he put the Axe of Peace back. "But first let's get out of here."

"Okay," Tommy said and Sam took him to the secondary exit he made just in case. They landed down in the water the prison had been built on and Sam helped Tommy swim to the shore.

"Tunnel!" Tommy said, pointing at the tunnel leading to Snowchester. "Let's go there!"

"Alright, I'll take you to Snowchester." Sam crafted a boat and got in, with Tommy getting in behind him, humming to himself as they headed towards the snowy biome.

"Who lives here," Tommy asked, taking in every bit of detail and rubbing his hands together to warm up.

"Tubbo does, I think Foolish and Ranboo do as well," Sam said, he knew he would have to go back to the prison to double check all the safety protocol and move Tommy's items.

"Tubbo," Tommy perked up, "let's see Tubbo!"

"I don't think he's here right now," Sam said, he would have to go back to the Dream SMP to see if Puffy or anyone else could watch Tommy, but then he'd have to explain what happened. "Come on Tommy."

"I'm cold," he said, trudging through the snow behind Sam to Tubbo's cabin.

"I know, but you need to stay here while I go do some things," Sam said, grabbing a cloak from a chest and wrapping it around Tommy. "I don't think Tubbo will mind if you look around."

"Who's up there," Tommy asked, hearing noises from the attic. He went over to the ladder and climbed up and opened the trapdoor to see Micheal entertaining himself. "Hallo! I'm Tommy."

"Oh, that's Micheal," Sam said, climbing up behind him. "Be careful. I have to go. Don't go outside, okay?"

"Okee," Tommy said, looking intently at Micheal as he snorted to himself. Tommy then made some piglike noises, making the young zombie piglin perk up and squeal in excitement.

"Wait, you know piglin," Sam asked, pausing as he started back down.

"Techno teached me, he's a pig-in," Tommy said, then made more noises and the two children continued to talk to each other. "Go away now."

"Well have fun, stay safe Tommy," Sam said, climbing down and closing the doors behind him.

Michael started to point at the photos of him, Ranboo, and Tubbo. Tommy looked at them and searched his memory, as far as he could remember Phil didn't have any pictures like that. Michael oinked as he offered Tommy a handful of cake. His stomach rumbled as he looked at the treat.

"Here I can give you a potato," Tommy said, offering one of the raw potatoes he had left over from the prison. "I don't like them." Michael lit up and took the potatoes, happily eating them.

"Hi Michael," Tubbo came up to see them, they hadn't even heard him open the door. "I'm back buddy."

"Michael wishes you and Ranboo were home more, and he's cold," Tommy said, pulling Tubbo's attention to him. "Hallo!"

"I- hello, who are you," Tubbo asked, he didn't think any other children were on the server, let alone human children.

"It's me, Tommy, remember me Tubbo," Tommy grinned, cake frosting covering his mouth. Tubbo froze. There was no way, it was impossible, he was seeing things. He had to be. Slowly Tubbo climbed back down the ladder.

"How is he," Ranboo asked, carrying a armful of red berry branches, he had slowly been working on clearing out all the berry bushes so Michael could safely walk around outside.

"I-I uh, he's cold," Tubbo stammered, still not fully processing what he found out.

"I can make him a coat, we do have the extra fabric," Ranboo said, he climbed up the ladder to see Tommy and Michael.

"You need this more than I do," Tommy pulled off the cloak and wrapped it around Michael. "I'll ask them to put a fireplace up here."

"Well hello there, who are you," Ranboo said, closing the trapdoor behind him. He sat down in front of the boys.

"Tommy," he said gleefully, "I was stuck with a bad man called Dweam, Sam took me here. He's looking for Wilbur."

"I- okay, do you remember anything before that," Ranboo asked, wondering if he knew everything that Tommy did. "Do you remember me?"

"Uh, no, but you're Ranboo right?" Tommy asked, "and why is Dweam in prison? What bad things did he do?"

"Well he killed multiple people, he blew up something that used to be Tubbo's, he stole some things of yours and did alot of bad things to you," Ranboo said, not mentioning how Dream had used him as well.

"Well I don't remember," Tommy said, he looked at Michael who had been jumping in the corner and snorted to him. "He wants to go outside."

"You understand him," Ranboo asked, he had been trying to find a book on piglin but now that he knew Tommy could speak it that would be a big help.

"Yeah, Techno taught me," Tommy said, making Ranboo feel stupid. Of course, he should have asked Techno to teach him, but then again he had no idea when he would wake up, and he might end up having to tell Techno about Michael.

"What do you remember," Ranboo asked, trying to get a better idea of what happened to Tommy, even if he wouldn't remember.

"Uh, Philza and Wilbur are my family, Techno is a friend of Dadza's, he was the ruler of some place," Tommy stifled a yawn, "the Antarctic Empire."

"Do you want to stay here until Sam comes back," Ranboo asked, Tommy nodded, leaning his head against him.

"Mhm," Tommy mumbled, the events of the past week finally catching up with him. Now that he was outside and could see the sun his lack of sleep started to take hold.

"I'll see if we have an extra blanket," Ranboo said as Michael looked at Tommy curiously. He went down the ladder to see Tubbo muttering to himself.

"Ranboo, please tell me I was just seeing things up there," Tubbo said, pacing around. "Cause I thought I saw Tommy, young Tommy."

"Oh he's there alright," Ranboo said, "I didn't believe it at first, but of course I've never seen young Tommy. So he couldn't have been an illusion."

"But how is he alive," Tubbo said, sitting down on one of the chests.

"Maybe Sam will know, cause Tommy doesn't remember why he was in there," Ranboo said, he grabbed their extra blanket. "But he is cute like this."

"Don't let him know that," Tubbo let out a small chuckle. When Ranboo went back up Tommy had fallen asleep in Michael's bed, Michael was lying down by him.

"Tubbo, get up here, you need to see this," Ranboo whisper yelled.

"What is it," Tubbo came up and 'aww'ed when he saw the two boys sleeping next to each other. "I forgot how peaceful he is when asleep."

"He sleeps like a baby," Ranboo said, "we're not letting this go when he gets back to normal, right?"

"Definitely not," Tubbo laughed, imagining the amount of teasing they could do with this.

"Ranboo, Tubbo, are you guys here," Sam called from downstairs.

"Shh, Tommy just fell asleep," Ranboo jumped down with Tubbo following behind. "So why is he like this?"

"Dream said he brought Tommy back," Sam said, "and he isn't happy this happened."

"Back, like back from the dead," Tubbo clarified.

"Yes, I'm going to try to look through my books and see if there's anyway to fix this," Sam said, "I just wanted to make sure Tommy was okay, are you guys good to watch him? If not I'm sure I could find Puffy or someone else."

"Well once he wakes up I could take Tommy with me, he's talked alot about Phil and Techno," Ranboo offered.

"I don't know, Phil hasn't been the best parent to Tommy in the past," Sam said, "I'd much rather have him stay here, where I know he's safe."

"Well we can't keep this a secret forever, the entire server knows he died," Tubbo said.

"But if the Eggpire knows he's alive they'll go after him," Sam said, "Sam Nook warned me that they were trying to kill him."

"I think alot more than just them were after him," Ranboo said, "If I remember correctly Niki said Jack had tried to kill him." He left out the part of Niki trying to as well, but she had changed, and she was part of the Syndicate.

"So we keep this between us right now, once we get Tommy aged back up he can decide what he wants to do," Sam said.

"I'll look through Phil's library for a solution," Ranboo pulled out his book to write down a reminder.

"We still have to tell someone, there's going to be times when we're all busy," Tubbo said, "and Tommy's not going to be as willing as Michael to stay here all day."

"I think we can trust Puffy, and possibly Quackity, that way he can be around different people," Sam said, he would have to check how close Tommy and Quackity were. Foolish was an option as well, and could protect Tommy if it came to it, but with the Eggpire attacking Foolish he wasn't so sure.

Later that day Ranboo had met up with Philza to help him work on his cabin. Phil was in the basement, trading with Techno's villagers.

"So Phil, can I ask you about something?" Ranboo said, coming down to help him.

"Of course mate, what's up," Phil said.

"What's the 'Antarctic Empire'," Ranboo asked, what Tommy said earlier stuck with him. And he knew it was safer to ask Phil before Techno.

"Do not ever bring that up with Techno," Phil said, his tone dark and warning. "Where the fuck did you hear that?"

"I- uh, Ghostbur mentioned something about it so I got curious," Ranboo lied, remembering that Sam had wanted to keep Tommy on the down-low for the time being.

"Alright, just don't tell Techno that I told you," Phil said, "the Antarctic Empire is a land far from here, it's where Techno lived before coming here. It's not quite an empire anymore and is the reason he hates government. He saw the state of everyone who lived there and hated himself for it. So he ended his reign and went into hiding, watching as the Empire tore themselves apart."

"That's crazy," Ranboo said, "but it does explain alot."

The next day Sam had run into Quackity while trying to find Puffy or Ranboo. He needed someone to watch Tommy, but Tuboo said he had other things to do.

"Oh thank god, Quackity can you do something for me," Sam said, stopping him.

"Uh, what is it," Quackity asked as Sam threw a book to him.

"Read that and go into the second floor suite of Tommy's hotel," Sam said, "you are to tell no one, if you have any questions find Tubbo or Ranboo."

"What the fuck, I have things I need to do myself," Quackity called as Sam ran off to finish repairing the prison, but with the mining fatigue he didn't know how long it would take him. Quackity sighed as he looked at the book, it wasn't titled and he decided to just pocket it. He walked to the hotel and when he confirmed Jack wasn't there, went up where Sam told him.

"Hallo!" Tommy waved, making Quackity jump. "Are you Big Q?"

"No, no, no," Quackity shook his head, it had to be some cruel joke.

"No?" Tommy said, "are you sad?"

"No! What's your name?" Quackity said, there was no way this was Tommy. He wasn't a kid, he was dead.

"Tommy, I'm five," he said, then walking back to what he was doing. He took a yellow paper he had cut out and put together, and put it on his head. It was a crown. "I'm like Techno!"

"Okay, but why are you a child," Quackity pulled out the book and began to read it. It explained to him the situation as far as they knew, that he was to keep Tommy hidden, and the added death threat if anything happened to Tommy.

"What's wrong with being a child," Tommy asked, everyone had been talking as if him being like this was wrong. This statement make Quackity burst out laughing, the older Tommy would have never said that.

"I don't know, I mean you're probably less of a handful at this age," Quackity said, ruffling Tommy's hair. He had to make the most of this, and he had the perfect idea of how. "How would you like to help me annoy an old grumpy ghost?"

"Sure," Tommy grabbed the moth toy he had spent all of last night begging Sam and Tubbo to make. "Ready."

"What's your moth's name," Quackity asked as he and Tommy left the hotel. Tommy waved by to Sam Nook as they passed him.

"His name is Clementine," Tommy said, Quackity tried not to laugh again as his British accent fully came out when he said the name. "And you have to say it just like me."

"Okay kid," Quackity spotted Jack in the distance, he was coming in their direction. "Listen to me, we're going to play superheroes right now. My name is Big Q, and yours, what's a name you like?"

"Bird man!" Tommy said, Quackity shook his head, there was no way Jack would buy that. "No, um, Sleepy Boi! It's what Wilbur would call us."

"That works. Now I need you to tell everyone you see that's your name, cause we're under cover and we can't let anyone know our real names," Quackity said, he just had to hope Jack would fall for it.

"Okee Big Q," Tommy said as they passed Jack. He originally walked right by, but did a double take when he saw Tommy.

"Wait is that- no that's impossible," Jack stopped, he said it to no one in particular, but Quackity had heard him.

"Who? This kid," Quackity asked, playing it off. "Why don't you tell Jack your name."

"I'm Sleepy Boi!" Tommy said, putting his fist in the air. There was a moment of confusion on Jack's face, but he seemed to buy it.

"Well if this little guy wants to have a room in my hotel, I might be willing to give it at a discount," Jack said, "well I have work to do, see you around Big Q."

"But that's my hotel," Tommy said as Jack went out of earshot, "Sam told me."

"Well right now you're not old enough to own the hotel," Quackity said, "and because Jack is the only employee he automatically got ownership when you were in the prison."

"I'm going to fire him as soon as I take it back," Tommy said, his head held high.

"Alright, you do that," Quackity chuckled, there was a small chance he would actually do that once they found a way to fix him.

#childinnit #tommyinnit #awsamdad #ranboo #micheal

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groovyzombiellama · 3 years ago

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You Have No Right 2

Title: You Have No Right 2

Requested? Yes.

Plot: You are rebuilding your life with your children and when Bjorn realises what he lost, he comes over to talk to you.

Words: 1220

Part 1

—***—

It was incredibly difficult at first to live your life without Bjorn. You have spent so long together that you didn’t know how to be alone. He was always someone you could lean on and now it was just you and your kids, who were confused as to why they were no longer seeing their father. All your dreams of a happy family were ruined in an instant by people who you trusted and who were supposed to be there for you and have your back. When you and Bjorn got married, you felt like it was the best day of your life and you only saw a life filled with happiness going forward, only for it to come crashing down. You never thought that one decision could all but ruin your life withing such a short time. You almost felt like you were a completely different person, as if you have aged down to the same age you were when you got married. Except, you had a responsibility as a mother to take care of your children who needed you now more than ever. And you had to get yourself together for them. You were not gonna let what happened between you and Bjorn affect your babies.

You were really grateful to your confidant for coming with you when you left. And for talking you out of going back to Bjorn in the beginning, because for some reason, even if he had caused you so much pain, you still loved him. That amount of love that you had for Bjorn can’t just go away in one night. You realised that you were giving so much love to him, without getting the same amount back. It looked to you like he loved you as much as you loved him, but the look in his eyes when you confronted him in front of everyone was enough to show you that you were the one who loved more in your marriage. Actually, the mere fact that your husband decided to cheat on you, with no true motive, since he didn’t continue seeing Astrid after that, degraded the image you had of him in your eyes. The hardest thing to do was get his icy blue eyes out of your head. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw them, and you saw them the way they once were, looking at you lovingly, as if you were the only woman in the world.

You were going to miss those days, but it was time to look to the future, to make sure your children are not lacking in anything. You were gonna prove it to Bjorn and to anyone else who thinks that you can’t do it, you’re gonna show them that you in fact can. That you are your own person and that you can be successful on your own. You had to explain to your children that you were not gonna be living with their father anymore, and it broke your heart even more over what Bjorn did when you saw the looks in their eyes. You knew they were sad, because they were too young to understand why they were not gonna see their father anymore, after all, they love him and you know he loves them too, even if he might not have love you as much. All three of your children had their father’s eyes, and you knew that no matter how sad and angry you are, you will always see Bjorn when you look into their eyes. You wanted your own children to have their own path, so you did your best not to think of the man who betrayed you so badly.

Regardless of how much it pained you to think about what happened over and over again, you couldn’t help but wonder how Bjorn was doing from time to time. Did he care that you were gone? What was his reaction when he saw that the four of you were gone? Did he een care enough to want to find you? You had no idea what he was doing or how he was feeling, and the fact that you still cared was driving you insane. But you knew that all the years you two spent together can’t be erased just like that, and that a part of you, no matter how big or small, will always care about Bjorn. He did give you your three babies and when you were at the prime of your love, the most beautiful years of your life. So there was no way you could know that Bjorn missed you like hell. He wanted to look for you himself, but he wouldn’t even know where to begin, so instead he gave out orders to his men to track you down. At first he thought it was because you took the children with him and he was prepared to take them back with him.

But the more he was without you, the more he realised that he missed you too and that there was no reason to take the kids away from their mother, when in no way were you a bad mother. In fact he felt stupid for even considering for a second that he would take the kids back with him and not let you see them. It made him stop in his tracks and realise how wrong he was. He let the power he had as king get to him, and he forgot just how much you meant to him. He let himself forget that you are the love of his life and in that moment he felt so ashamed that he let that happen. Instead of fighting for you, he lost you, and he was ready to do anything and everything that it took to get you back in his life. He didn’t mind waiting no matter how much it takes. So when he found you, he took all the precautions to make sure you don’t automatically run away when you see him.

He wanted to be in your life, he regretted what he had done. For the first few times after he found out where you were, he spent time looking at how your life was now, and he was actually happy to see how strong you were and that you were holding your own so well. And for some time he considered weather he should even approach you, but he missed you and the children so much that he decided to try and talk to you. You were a lot stronger than you ever were, so he knew it was possible that you would reject him, but he still had to try, realising that you and your children are the reason he was ever whole. And that without you four, he was the shell of a man that he once was. Even if you rejected him now, he wanted to be part of the lives of his kids and he would wait for however long it takes to get you back too. You were not gonna fall back to him, your value of yourself was higher than ever and you knew that you could hold your own. You were not about to be corrupted that easily and Bjorn was going to see what he lost.

---***---

sorry it took so long, I had to plan it out a bit, hope you like it :)

It’s up to youweather you would take him back and why :)

Tags: @bjornsholyarmring (original fic request) , @dakotapaigelove

Buy me a coffee?: https://ko-fi.com/groovyzombiellama

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dangermousie · 3 years ago

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CFC Chapter 54

“A crashing car?” Ahahahaha I see you, Meatbun. But it was indeed an utter pileup!

I know I commented on this passage in its various iterations eight billion times already but I still have more to say. And it’s that XQC taking so long to realize that even though HY is young, his emotions and feelings are as genuine and strong as those of anyone older is so realistic - people do tend to think that especially with regard to children - think of a reaction of an adult to a three year old crying over ice cream they dropped. It’s all amused even if not meanly so. Because to an adult with vastly more experience, this is not a big deal. But what that forgets is that whether it’s ridiculous to someone else or not, to the person at issue that is a real feeling, AND that of course a person can only feel through the lens of their experience - what else is there? Emotions aren’t any less valid because they are informed by lesser or different experience.

Honestly, to me so far this is one of the driving messages of the novel - everyone is in their own world of issues and pain and none of these characters can truly look through the lens of another person and it would be so much better if they did. To XQC, for so long, He Yu’s strong feelings (and we know so many of these feelings are awful - despair, and self-loathing, and loneliness) never quite felt real and therefore never quite felt fully valid. And by the time it wasn’t the case, it was too late.

But the same is true for He Yu - he is so concentrated on his own grievances and his own pain, he cannot perceive others’ different issues. In He Yu’s mind, he’s the winner and always champion of Misery Olympics and while he’s had a horrible time of it, that doesn’t mean other people didn’t either just in different ways. Whether because of his condition, his issues or just his age, HY is not empathetic in the least.

And think about it - XQC does not have a horrible illness. He does not have unfeeling parents. But he had to watch his beloved parents brutally murdered in front of his eyes at 13 (!!!!) and then had to raise a 5 year old by himself. Is it worse or better than HY’s trauma? That’s a matter of opinion but what there is no question about is that is a different type of trauma and a different type of scar. Or think about the patient in the asylum whose name I am too lazy to look up - her life is such a theater of horrors that to me, it makes the combined issues of HY and XQC seem small, though once again that’s subjective. Nobody wins when people start this sort of competition.

My heart breaks for XQC but also - I am sorry - if/when HY x XQC hook up again (how? I have no idea! But that is one of the joys of Meatbun - I both have no idea how/where it’s going and utterly trust her), please have He Yu read up and learn things because Good God. You should not be in major pain the morning after unless you are into pain and XQC clearly is not!

The other thing is the bit about XQC forcing himself to walk in his usual ramrod-straight manner is the moment I went utterly gone for him. I mean, I liked him and found him interesting before. But this is the thing that flipped that invisible switch for me and I went rabid and irrational and now I am Team XQC and I don’t care what he wants and does from now on, he should have it. It’s so small but so real. My mother and her mother were both big on straight posture. And one of the reasons they gave was when you walk with good posture - you look confident but also it makes you feel confident and stronger. And I’ve actually found it to be true - when you throw your shoulders back and straighten your neck and hold your head up, it does not just give others a signal, it gives a signal to your own brain. So to see XQC insist on doing it, despite being emotionally and physically shattered - because of his pride refusing to give up, because he’s so unbending, but also this being some sort of instinctive armor, just hits straight through the heart.

OK, I laughed at HY as a fucking machine. But also, this is another point in the whole “everyone has issues” narrative and HY’s life could be worse. HY, with all his other issues, can pay an insane amount, an amount that XQC could not pay in a million years, so easily. It’s not even a blip to him. Hell, the fact that he forgot to pay speaks to that - I can see forgetting to pay a friend a couple of bucks back right away because it’s not much money. HY forgets because it does not loom in his mind. And this rich lifestyle is instinctive, is ingrained in him. I think he’d find it hard to be poor.

THAT is what he’s thinking about? Priorities are...

The sole good thing that came out of this insanity is that XQC is getting in touch with his emotions, even if those emotions are (rightly) rage. He’s too closed off from them normally.

The fact that you slept with a man should be secondary to the fact that you drugged and raped him, but here we are...

To me, this sums up He Yu as a moral wasteland. To still, when sober and past his fit and not under influence of wine, to still feel excitement over his revenge and to somehow twist it that it’s XQC’s fault for being raped by He Yu is !!!!!!!!!

(I suppose if I were charitable, I’d assume that the disquiet is small stirrings of almost dead conscience and his “he deserved it” is an attempt to justify the unjustifiable to himself, but I honestly don’t want to think so because I am so angry at him. Not until I see some more evidence. I don’t feel like being indulgent with He Yu since he’s indulgent with himself enough for two.)

1. The fact that you can tell from the picture XQC got taken by a man (I am gonna defer to Meatbun’s expertise here) definitely points to the fact that the pictures are going to be used for something bad later - because if it’s just oh XQC had sex, so what, he’s single what’s the big deal. But like this it becomes a different matter. No idea if it will be used for HY or XQC or both, and by whom (money is on Duan and co, but after the way HY went off, I would never say HY himself won’t use it badly somehow) but knowing Meatbun, it will go for maximum damage.

2. Ruthless? Perhaps. Unfeeling? Hmmmm. I am not He Yu’s biggest fan atm but that’s a wonderfully misleading adjective here. He does still seem to be in shock. And fixating.

3. The whole “hahahaha XQC is a hypocrite when he was all ‘I am not interested in sex’“ is - I am not sure if HY is just short-circuiting (fine) or using a rapist justification/rolling in a sea of toxic toxicity (not fine) because I am sorry, that’s totally like “he/she had a reaction, can’t be rape” writ large. Yeah, sure he had a reaction - you poured drugs down his throat. That has nothing to do with his default preferences or his actual state. THE FUCK?!

Anyway, we end on the whole “u mad bro?” bit and you know what strikes me? HY was all “I am done, we are done, my revenge is complete I don’t care” but here he is, still desperately seeking and craving reaction and interaction from XQC.

I remain utterly puzzled as to how these two will ever be a couple except for a couple being defined as “two mutually homicidal people.” Leaving aside everything else, I am willing to accept HY is in the closet - clearly whatever his orientation is, it includes men. But I do not get that sense from XQC at all. When he’s not drugged, he’s barely interested in sex with anyone and I do not get the sense he’s in the closet either. Chances of anyone, let alone He Yu, who is both a man and someone who raped him to humiliate him, being able to entice him into sexual encounters voluntarily is about the chance of me going to visit Mars. Meatbun loves doing insane things so I can’t wait.

PS I know people use the term psychopath all the time casually but ummm, I think He Yu may actually be one? When he has his father (!!!) on speakerphone, calmly carrying a conversation with the man as he’s raping his father’s friend in the club as he talks (!!!!!) that is...in RL I’d be “team lock him up for life, there is something so basic broken in him that it can’t be fixed.” Like - the hell? The ability to put things on different shelves so much is not in the same country as sane (it makes me think of 2ha and TXJ banging CWN being the curtain while performing court business but TXJ was bona fide clinically insane and also this is worse because this is his actual freaking father omg.) Of course, only time will tell whether it’s evidence of him being irreparably incapable of normalcy in terms of living in the world/interacting with others or it was an extreme psychotic (in casual parlance not medical one) break because most people are capable of truly horrific stuff if certain levers are pushed and his default is saner. It’s the question, isn’t it? Whether He Yu’s factory default setting is the monster of the previous chapters or the kid who’d cut his wrists so as not to hurt others.

Anyway, this novel is a terrifying roller coaster ride and I love having strong emotions.

#cnovel #meatbun doesn't eat meat #case file compendium

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linkspooky · 2 years ago

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Hello again! It’s me! The one who asked a bunched of questions about your Werewolf fic!

Thank you for answering them! It really did clears things up for me!

I actually got a few of more question actually, since I sort of forgot to ask them last time. (Although, that ask was getting long enough so maybe it was a blessing?)

Anyway, my first question is that, Mai mentioned how Maki killed the Hei man in order to protect, but it seems like it was the Hei man that took Maki alone and then Maki killed him out of self defense. Am I missing some subtle context? Or was there a sinister motive behind the Hei man?

Second question is that since Mai went solo by going to Ito Rie’s house, does that mean that Shoko, Maki, and Nobara were back at the hotel? What were they doing during that time? I was surprised that Mai was able to go solo since Nobara would probably be up in Mai’s head since she would think Mai is slacking off again or something.

Third question, since the “Faceless Maki” is actually a shadow cursed spirit that Mai manifested what grade would it be? It seem to be pretty intelligent (seems to be a bit full of it self, which I love. cute quirky little curse). So would you say it to be above Grade 1? And how long ago did this curse started to manifest?

Last one. I doubt you would be able to write anytime soon since writing takes a while, and life stuff happens. But I do wonder if you have a vague idea when you going to write the epilogue and the sequel?

Oh! But do take your time tho! Self care is waaaaay more important! I just want have a general idea out of curiosity. You don’t have to answer it if you don’t wanna.

Hello, don’t worry about sending me asks about my fics I love to talk about them so I can answer these all day long! Thank you so much for reading and sharing your thoughts with me.

Okay, so I answered.this question a little bit [here already], but let’s say there are darker implications on the kind of abuse women face in the Zenin clan.

My intention when writing that scene was basically to show the two ways that Maki and Mai display their victimhood, Mai tends to be entirely passive she endures what she has been through and then bottles it all up deep down inside of her. Maki has always fought back and retaliated with violence.

It was also to show the way they reacted to what essentially is similar abuse in the Zenin clan is so different, and also the way they show concern for one another is different. More or less what happened in that scene which I left to an implication because I didn’t want to be gratuitious about it is that a man who was a member of the Hei squad, later went on to try to abuse Maki in the same way. However, in this case Maki snapped and murdered him because Maki fights back and Mai endures.

Afterwards, Mai discovers Maki with the body and helps her twin sister who has just committed a murder hide the body so Maki won’t get into even more trouble with their family than she already is. Mai perceives Maki’s violence as the way Maki both protects herself, and her. Which makes sense because Maki has assumed the role of the stronger one and the protector ever since they were children and Mai was scared to look at the cursed spirits that Mai couldn’t see so Maki held her hand and promised to never abandon her.

Mai has much more complicated feelings about her sister that she shows on the surface, and also admires Maki in a way and sees Maki as the stronger one and so she saw Maki’s action as killing the same person who abused Mai as protecting her. We don’t really see Maki’s perspective in this flashback so we don’t know exactly what happened, did Maki kill this man because she knew what happened to Mai, or did she just snap and kill him out of self defense b/c Maki cannot take the abuse that the Zenin continually heaps on her without reaching a breaking point and lashing out with violent retribution.

For Mai there’s admiration for her sister’s strength and also a sense of inferiority and envy because she believes herself to be “lesser” because she doesn’t fight back, she endures instead, however in that scene after Maki snapped and killed a man the one who helped her hide the body was Mai, and Mai has always tried to be there for her sister in her own way.

Okay, so it’s still fair you’re confused by this because I didn’t transition between the scenes too well. IT’s a bit difficult in a limited perspective to keep track of where everyone is, but you know I could have done a better job as well because what is clear in my head isn’t always clear what I write.

Basically, from the start Mai has announced her intention to slack off and not attempt to do anything helpful for the Jujutsu Mission, and like she did sneak out to go drinking so like she’s already shown Noara once that she fully intends to goof off on the mission.

Shoko, Maki and Nobara are all taking the mission seriously and attempting to search the area for the cursed spirit to fight, and they are investigating in a more standard way, they are probably properly following whatever Shoko’s instructions are on what to do next.

Umm, one idea for a scene that I had that ended up getting cut was that Shoko after finding out that Maki killed an innocent girl by accident was going to have to give the body back to the parents of that girl and also come up with a lie as to why that girl died. And Maki was with her for that and tried to explain to the mother what happened to her daughter.

Nobara has been following Mai around constantly through the fic. However, I think after the whole ordeal of both burying the body of the girl Maki killed on accident and then kissing Mai while they had a corpse in the truck was something Nobara needed to take some time to herself to sort through her thoughts. We didn’t really get to see that but basically, in the epilogue chapter there’s a scene planned that shows Nobara and Mai still aren’t really communicating. Basically, they both agree not to talk about the kiss, and that they don’t like each other, b/c Nobara just doesn’t really want to think about it, the everything that happened, her new perspective on Maki as someone violent, her seeing a more positive side of Mai both of them are like shaking Nobara’s foundations and Nobara is pretty fixed in their beliefs. Basically, they agree they don’t like each other, and then say the kiss is a mistake and will never happen again. And then they kiss again. Like idiots. Therefore ending it on a cliffhanger.

Faceless Maki / MAi is a shadow cursed spirit that Mai manifested. I can actually give you a bunch more lore I thought of for her, since she’s going to be important in the planned sequel to the fic.

Her name is Mai Mai. Or Maiko. Or Not-Mai.

Not-Mai is the most common one she uses. The rest are just silly names she came up with for herself. She is the cursed spirit who is Not-Mai. She’s based off of the legend of doppelgangers, another version of yourself who will hunt you down and then replace you, however rather than disliking Mai she likes her and therefore rather than malevolent her intentions are more positive.

She is essentially Mai’s jungian shadow who is made up of the repressed parts of Mai’s personality, she messes with Mai’s head a little bit, she makes Mai question herself because she is the unconscoius part of Mai’s mind that is made up of everything Mai won’t acknowledge and because Mai is an incredibly repressed individual as she endures rather than fight back, all of those repressed thoughts and feelings have to go somewhere. However, Mai’s shadow doesn’t hate her, for two reasons, the shadow isn’t the evil side of yourself, it’s just made of the thoughts and feelings you don’t acknowledge. You can never get rid of your shadow, you can only accept it and work with it. The second is that as negative as Mai is about herself, Mai is also a very loving person, in canon itself her love for Mai is extremely selfless cultivating in her going back to the Zenin House for the sake of Maki when she is a much weaker person who had no hope of fighting back, and also giving her life for her. Mai is a person capable of loving, and who wants to be loved in return, so therefore the cursed spirit that Mai created doesn’t hate her because even at her deepest most repressed self Mai isn’t a hateful person.

It’s kind of like the duality of self-loathing, and a desire for self-love that is the conflict that makes up Mai’s character arc. You have to actively work through feelings of self-loathing before you can reach self acceptance.

Her shadow is a grade one cursed spirit around the same level of power as Choso. However, her power doesn’t lie really in physical battles her real talent is hiding in people’s shadows and watching through their eyes. She’s a spirit of deception and camouflage rather than physical prowess, matching the doppelganger myth. But she is abovet Grade One due to her sentience. She doesn’t technically have to be in Mai’s shadow, she could jump to Maki’s shadow, to Nobara’s shadow if she really really wanted to, she just likes Mai the most.

She could be a lot stronger, she could use a version of Mai’s cursed technique because she is a copy of Mai (basically two abilities: scan where she hides in someone’s shadow and observes, and second: create where she copies someone. She is an exact copy of Mai. She could theoretically be a copy of someone else, but she would lose her current dientity as a copy of Mai. She wants to stay Mai so she doesn’t change.) She COULD theoretically use Mai’s cursed technique, but she would have to consume a lot of Mai’s cursed energy to do so, or even potentially eat Mai. She has reserves of cursed energy that are higher than Mai’s and can use RCT right now due to her nature as a pure cursed technique, but her refusal to take any real cursed energy from Mai means she spends most of her time hiding with weak reserves of cursed energy.

She was created a year ago when Mai first signed up for the Jujutsu Academy in Kyoto, because of Mai’s desire to be more like Maki, plus the pressure she forced from her clan to become a jujutsu sorcerer now that Mai was one.

I have specific worldbuilding lore about how she was created but that’s in another fic. All of my JJK fics exist in generally the same continuity and sometimes they reference each other by having ocs from other fics show up. If you’re curious about that it’s called “Exponential Growth”.

For your last question, basically I can only work on one fanfic project at a time otherwise my brain breaks. ANd when I start one I work on it until completion. The fic I’m writing on right now is a teen titans fanfic called “Things Fall Apart”, basically I’m 5/6ths of the way done with the first draft, and once I was finished with the entire first draft of the story I was going back to write the epilogue.

I have two fics planned for the sequel, the first is a YutaMaki fic where they go to Hakari’s fighting arena on a mission, the second is a rewrite of the Zenin Family Massacre arc where Mai doesn’t die.

#askspookies #werewolf #fanfic asks #nobody dies au

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jawritter · 4 years ago

Text

Where The Green Grass Grows

Chapter 2

Summary: Life changes, nothing ever stays the same. With most change comes with some degree of pain, that’s how we grow. Jensen thought he had his whole life planned out, written for him in the bright lights of Hollywood. One failed marriage later, and a lifetime of lessons learned, lead him home to a place he thought he’d left behind him when he was only a teenager. He thought his life was over. He felt like he’d lost everything, but who knew one little trip to the local diner that had just opened up outside of town would turn his whole world upside down. All because he met you. Maybe a little slower pace of life isn’t such a bad idea after all…

Warnings: Language, Angst, mention of past OC character death, mention of grief, dealing with a divorce. Drinking. I think that's about it for this chapter.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Word Count: 2065

A/N: This fic is completely unbeta’d so all mistakes are mine!!Please do not copy my work! I hope you all enjoy this one! Feedback is golden!

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“Fuck me,” Jensen mumbled as he rolled onto his back from his stomach and looked up at the ceiling of his childhood bedroom.

His head was pounding, and his stomach was more than a little woozy. He desperately needed to stop drinking so damn much. He was just getting too old to do it anymore like he did when he was in his 20’s, and the hangovers were no joke anymore.

He was thankful that his mom had redecorated his bedroom over the years, and that it was set up as more of a guest room than it was his old bedroom. It helped to not have to face all those memories he had shoved way down, and just pretend it was a holiday or another family gathering where he had to stay over for a while.

He knew his time in Hollywood had come to an end for the foreseeable future because he was still having trouble keeping his emotions in check, and as long as he was doing that drinking had been his go too. It was a natural spiral for him, he was glad in a way the public didn’t have a chance to see just how bad he was. Alex was right about one thing, home had been a good place to hide.

He couldn’t hide from everyone here. That was the only problem. His family could see just how bad of a clusterfuck his life had turned out to be. He knew they knew he was drinking heavily, he saw it in the way his mom looked at him every morning when he finally dragged his back from the dead ass out of his room, and down for breakfast.

A loud rap on the door nearly made him fall out of the bed and with three heavy thuds he was brought back to reality.

Jensen looked up just in time to see his dad come into the room, and sit down in the small chair next to the window before turning the lamp on there. Jensen shielded his eyes from the assaulting light that flooded the room and groaned as he rolled himself over to hide in his covers.

“Morning,” his dad said, crossing his legs as he watched Jensen struggle to adjust to the light and refocus his gaze on his father.

“Morning,” Jensen finally mumbled, sitting up on the side of the bed, and running his hands through his sleep tousled hair.

“Mom’s got breakfast ready downstairs, and some slacks and a dress shirt ironed for you in the laundry room,” Alan said as he watched Jensen get up and stumbled his way towards the connecting bathroom, leaving the door cracked so that he could yell back over his shoulder to the older man sitting in the chair.

“Where are we going?” Jensen yelled before flushing the toilet and making his way to the sink to wash his hands and throw water on his face.

He didn’t like going out in the public eye right now. Someone always recognized him, and always had a damn camera ready.

“It’s Sunday, and as long as you live under this roof with us you know you will have to go to church with us,” Alan said simply as Jensen made his way back to sit on the foot of his bed. “That was the agreement when you moved back in here remember?”

Jensen tried to push down the annoyance that rose up in him surprisingly quickly.

Church? He hadn’t been to church in years. Hell, he didn’t even know after everything that he’d gone through if he even believed there was a God anymore.

Jensen licked his lips, attempting to choose his words carefully. This was his father’s house, and he had agreed to it when he’d moved in, he just didn’t anticipate Sunday coming so damn soon.

“Dad, I don’t know If I’m fit to walk into a church house this morning,” Jensen said, locking eyes with his father, and doing everything he could to convey without saying it out loud that he’d rather do anything than go to a church service.

He wasn’t really, he was doing all he could not to throw up right there in front of his dad.

“Eating will help with that hangover, then you can get a shower before we go, I’m confident you will be just fine.”

Jensen shook his head and let out an annoyed huff. Just like when he was a kid, there was no arguing with him. There was no pleasing him. So he just gave up like he always did. That’s one reason why he didn’t want to come back here. Here he was, a grown-ass man in his 40’s, and his dad was still telling him what to do.

“Jensen, look, I know you don’t want to go, but don’t do it for me, do it for your mom. She was so excited this morning when she got up to make breakfast that you were coming with us. She wants to make a whole day of it. Go out to a little diner just outside of town once it’s over, and just have a family day. Just... give her today.”

His dad stood up and made his way towards the door before turning around to look back at him.

“The only way you're ever going to move on from this son is to pick yourself up and just do it. No matter how much you want to just roll over and give up. If you do that, Danneel wins. Pick yourself up, shake it off, find a pretty girl to go out with to help you get over her, and put the bottle down for Christ stakes. It’s only going to cause you more pain in the long run.”

Jensen watched as his dad excited the room, his mind reeling with what he said to him. He knew he was right, he was never going to move on as long as he let himself wallow in what happened. He had to get past this. He wasn’t the first man to ever go through a divorce, and it wasn’t like it was all sunshine and roses while they were married.

Jensen forced his aching body to its feet and made his way towards the shower to rid himself of the smell of alcohol. They say what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger, but right now he didn’t feel so strong.

Five hours later, all the way across town, you had just finished cleaning up from the first lunch rush. Sundays were always a big tip day, and you could really use the money, so you didn’t complain not one bit about the almost constant on your feet that the day was sure to bring.

Most church groups came in all together, which made for large orders, and large tables. Today was not different. As far as you could tell there had already been seven church groups come through, and seeing as it was close to 1:30 pm, it wasn’t anywhere near over for you.

You were just contemplating taking a break before the next wave of customers, but you must have contemplated a minute too long because the dinging chime above the door announced the arrival of more guests.

It was a party of about seven adults and a few children. You could tell that they were all family just by looking at them, so it would probably be an easy table.

“Want me to grab that table?” Jess asked as you through the cloth you were wiping tables with in the bin behind the counter and started to make your way towards the table they had chosen with our pad and pin to start taking their orders.

“Na, It’s not that big of a table, I got it,” you answer her and she nods at you with a smile.

“Y/N, hold up a sec,” she says, running over to you to whisper in your ear. “You see that guy with the black shirt, the one who just took his shades off?”

Your eyes trained over the extremely attractive man with broad shoulders, brown, almost auburn hair, and the most astonishing pair of green eyes that seemed to sparkle even at this distance.

“That guy is Jensen Ackles, have you ever heard of him?” she asked, the smirk growing over her face as your eyes raked over the gorgeous specimen of a man sitting at the table looking at the menu that was already there. You watched him swat at the young girl you assumed was his sister playfully when she leaned over to annoy him.

“No, and right now who he isn’t important, what’s important is the tip I’m gonna get when he’s done.”

“I hear he’s recently divorced,” she said, but you cut her off, and made your way towards the table to take their drink orders, and introduce yourself. You didn’t need to know his history. The guy was way out of your league, and you weren’t an idiot.

“Hi, my name is Y/N, and I’ll be your waitress for this evening,” you announced as you came to a stop at the head of the table next to the oldest man, and the man that you were informed was Jensen Ackles.

Jensen’s eyes met yours and you swore to god for a moment you forgot how to breathe. He was so heartbreakingly handsome up close, and the moment he smiled at you, a swarm of butterflies was turned loose in your belly, and you haven’t felt like that in a very, very long time.

“Can I get you guys started with drinks?” you asked, clearing your throat, and quickly looked down at your pad to hide the blush creeping up in your cheeks.

“I’ll have a Dr. Pepper,” Jensen said, starting the roll call of drinks your way. Once everyone had their drinks, and you had brought their food to the table, you went to hide behind the counter, and try to catch your breath.

Every once in a while you would catch Jensen looking at you, and when he caught you looking back at him he would smile warmly at you, making those butterflies take flight all over again.

“You’re blushing, Y/N,” Jessica said, elbowing you playfully as she followed your gaze.

“Shut up,” you mumbled, and went back to refilling the ketchup bottles in front of you.

“He keeps staring at you ya know, maybe you should go ask him out.”

If looks could kill the look that you were giving her would have done the job. You didn’t have time to respond to her, because the sound of a throat being cleared behind you made you nearly jump out of your skin.

“I’d like to go ahead and pay if that’s okay?” Jensen said, as you turned around and the smirk Jensen gave you nearly made you fall flat on your ass.

The man was insultingly handsome, and he knew it.

“Sure,” Jessica said, turning to the register and giving him his total. His eyes barely left you as he paid for his meal, and you made your way over to start clearing the table they were sitting at.

You thought you had to escape him because you can’t think straight when he’s looking at you for some reason. You should have known better than to think it was over that quickly.

Looking down at the table as you picked up the plates you saw a folded napkin set in the center of what was Jensen’s plate with a note scrawled on the napkin, and a $100.00 bill tucked inside that simply said, “For the prettiest girl in Dallas.”

You turned around just in time to catch his eye as he winked at you, and followed his family out of the door. The look on your face must have been priceless because Jessica came running your way shaking your shoulders to get your attention.

“What is it? Talk to me Y/N!”

You showed her the note wordlessly. Your head was swimming with emotions as she squealed and jumped up and down with excitement next to you.

You were too stunned to do anything but stand there, how the fuck could you have a crush on someone that you had barely even spoken to? How the fuck could he have such a hold on you already?

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#jensen ackles #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles fanficiton #jensen ackles fanfic #jensen ackles series #jensen x reader #jensen x you #spn fanfinficiton #spn fanfic #spn series #dean winchester #where the green grass grows #x reader inserts

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the-romantic-lady · 4 years ago

Note

Surprised to hear you like Henry VI and Margaret of Anjou, given that you're a fan of Richard, Duke of York. Isn't that a conflict of interest or something? Lol. What's your opinion on Elizabeth Woodville and the Woodville clan, Margaret Beaufort, Warwick and the Neville clan, and George, Duke of Clarence? (Basically what's your opinion on the rest of the players of the Wars of the Roses lol.)

Gosh, anon you are encouraging me!! I love that you care about my thoughts <3. Alright then, let's start.

I used to be very anti-Margaret of Anjou. Until I started to look at things from her perspective. York was dangerously popular with a lot of children and a formidable wife. Margaret must have felt insecure. Also, there is this theory that Margaret's mentor and confidant William de la Pole, Duke of Suffolk was murdered under the order of the Duke of York. That must have been a tipping point. But I still think that York was the better ruler and person. I will get a lot of hate for this, but women in general were not suitable rulers for the Middle Ages. They were often driven by more personal ideals (Empress Matilda vs. Stephen is a great example and Margaret was no different). Ofc there were men like that too but women seemed to always be like that. As a woman, I understand and the later periods were more suitable for female leadership. York was a much better ruler. He was driven by the stability of the realm rather than his personal issues (he put his own son-in-law in prison and Margaret wouldn't even budge on her failure advisors). And her entitlement was mind-boggling. I love how messed up she was. And Henry...I just feel sorry for him. The Middle Ages also were not a time for artistic and kind kings lol.

Elizabeth Woodville and the Woodville Clan:

As I have said, I pretty much like everyone before 1485 lol. But Elizabeth Woodville was annoying af. That made her interesting but I can't get over how incredibly greedy she was. She was the daughter of a minor gentry and widow of a Lancastrian knight. Edward makes her queen and she abuses that power so much. She has problems with everyone. Warwick, George, Richard, any noble who didn't kiss her arse and even Edward. Queens were meant to level the mind of King. Edward III's queen famously saved French clergy by going on her knees to beg the King for mercy. Ofc that was a bit dramatic but many Queens did this. It was called the Queen's mercy or something like that. But boy was she a hell of a woman. Despite being raised in a pretty privileged household, she was shrewd and survived to the end. She could have learned a thing or two from Cecily Neville about how to put that strong personality to better use but regardless. Also, I love how she was shunned fron Henry Tudor's court when Richard welcomed her to his with open arms. I mean...karma. But all in all, I like her. Its as they say "well behaved women seldom make history". She had flaws (so did the everyone else!) but her character is interesting and admirable. And despite that shaved forehead, she is a gorgeous woman. So I get where Edward was coming from XD The other social climbing members Woodville..not so much. The shameless way that they tried to push themselves in and take hold of power when they had literally fought on the losing Lancastrian side is embarrassing and oh so disgusting. Like Warwick secured the throne for Edward and they were given precedence over him. I just...yeah. John Woodville legit married a 65 year old duchess (he was 19) for money and power. They were a hungry bunch and courting them was Edward IV's biggest mistake and towards the end of his life, I think he saw that.

Margaret Beaufort

I will keep this short since I don't know much about her but I dislike her. I understand that she went through a lot. Her father apparently suicided when she was 1 and that is traumatic. And back then suicide was mocked and disgraced. She ofc blamed the Duke of York....cause at this point why not? She ofc went through a really young and traumatic birth at 13. Her husband was gross and that's that. And we know that Edward kept her son exiled so she couldn't see him. But despite all this, I just don't like her? I suppose its the super impressive Plantagenet women who just make me look at the sleezy and dull Margaret with disdain. And she gives me real phony vibes. Like at times, she just seemed to cosplay Cecily Neville lol. When you see women like Cecily Neville and Margaret of Anjou taking charge in the way they did, Margaret and her deceptive ways are just cringe worthy.

The Earl of Warwick

This man. Just this man. The way that England seemed to revolve around his whims is amazing. He was a real Duke of York stan and so I have to appreciate him. But he was so fearless. Henry VI, Edward IV, Margaret of Anjou, you name it. He stood against them. The Duke of York seemed to be someone he admired but other than that, he fought for himself. He helped Edward take the crown and worked hard to keep Edward's throne. He was embarrassed with the whole secret marriage saga but still stuck by. But Edward clearly forgot who he owed his success too. The man escaped an assassination by Henry VI's men and saved his father and uncle from it. He actually took charge in the first Battle of St. Albans in 1455 because his rivals the Percys were mocking him. I just love him. Ngl, sometimes when I read about him, I just blush. A man if there ever was one. There were so many attempts at disgracing him. He was the Captain of Calais and in that role fought Medieval pirates! And he was ruthless at it. People loved him and he carried that popularity well. I should stop fangirling over a dead guy. I think I made it pretty clear that I love him XD.

Neville clan

I like them too. Warwick's father was pretty much York's best friend and I love him for it. They were also social climbers like the Woodvilles but so much better at it. They didn't have the entitlement that the Woodvilles did and managed their powers well. Cecily Neville was ofc a Neville and she is one of my favorites. One of my favorite thing about them is how courageous they were. Like all of them. Unfortunately, Anne and Isabel are both obscure figures. I wish we knew more about them. They were pushed around like prizes. Good on Richard for giving Anne a position to make her own decision. I feel bad for those girls. Although the York brothers were known to be good looking so lucky them?

George, Duke of Clarence

Ah, George. I love this man. If there was one son of York who inherited his father's glamour and charm, it was George. And I love that he stood up to his brother and sister-in-law. He was sometimes too problematic but I still love that! Glamourous and problematic. How can one not love the man? Although his betrayal of Edward is kind of sad considering that Edward really tried to be like a dad to his brothers. George took Edward's love for granted for too long. His breakdown after his wife's death is really sad too. Interestingly, this seems to be a pattern with the Plantagenet men. They all have breakdowns and downfalls after the death of their wives. Their women are so much stronger emotionally.

I know this was long! I hope you enjoyed the post :D. I would love to know your thoughts too and if you agree or disagree. Seriously, thank you for letting me talk about this. Nothing makes me happier than to discuss these people!

#elizabeth woodville #edward iv #george duke of clarence #richard neville #earl of warwick

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fiveisnumber1 · 4 years ago

Text

Timeless - Five Hargreeves x Reader

Word Count: 3828

Warnings: None

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23

_________________________

Pt 11 - Lost In The Past

You didn't know how long it had been since you started crying but there came a point where you could cry no more. The tears no longer fell and your screams were nothing more than gasps of air. You felt empty like every last bit of emotion inside you was just released into the hollow house. Wiping the tears from your eyes you felt a gentle hand stroke your hair.

"There there, why don't we go get you some food to eat? You must be hungry after all that crying." Grace says

You turn your head to look at her and give her a small nod. Grace extends her hand to help you stand from the floor and when you stand she wraps an arm around you, guiding you to the kitchen. Sitting you down at the kitchen table, Grace starts to cook while you try to come to terms with your new reality. You had so many questions and yet you weren't sure if you had the words to vocalize them.

"Grace?" You call

"Hm?" She replies

"What happened since I've been gone?" You question softly

"Well George W. Bush served as president until 2008 when Barack Obama was elected to the presidency. The company Apple invented the iPhone in 2007 which revolutionized technology by giving phones touch screens. Youtube, Facebook, and other social media platforms grew to international success during the time you were gone. The-" Grace replies but you cut her off

"No, I mean...what happened here?" You say

Grace stops cooking for a second and turns to you.

"Oh. Well, you and Five went missing on the same day eleven years ago and things were never quite the same. Your disappearances took a toll on both your family and ours. I remember that about three years after you left, your parents packed up and moved to wherever they went. They were so distraught and I don't blame them it's very difficult to lose a child. I recall that back then Diego really tried his best to track them down in case you ever came back."

"What happened to Diego? And the others?"

"Diego left the house right when he turned eighteen, and Vanya, Klaus, and Allison left shortly thereafter which happened about six or so years ago. Luther stayed but now he's up on the moon doing some important research for Mr. Hargreeves!"

"You forgot about Ben." You state

"Oh right...Ben. Ben died on a mission in 2006. I don't know if you saw in the courtyard but there's a memorial statue for him there."

"He died?" You reply shocked

Grace nods.

"Yes and that was the straw that broke the camel's back, after you and Five went missing, and Ben's death, the rest of the children had no desire to stay in the house. It's difficult having to lose all your children one by one..." Grace states before putting on a chipper voice "Anyway here's a grilled cheese sandwich!"

"Oh." You say surprised at her quick shift of emotion "Uh, thank you."

"No problem (Y/N). Feel free to walk around the house and if you need anything else just ask! I'll be in the laundry room." Grace says before leaving

As she exits the kitchen and heads upstairs to the laundry room, you stare at the grilled cheese before pushing the plate away and putting your face in your hands. Everything felt like it was moving at a million miles per hour and you couldn't make it stop. You needed to get your mind off of things. Lifting you head out of your hands you stand up and grab your sandwich off the plate and walk towards a calendar on the kitchen wall. It read November 22nd, 2013. You shook your head and decided to leave the room. Strolling out of the kitchen and around the Umbrella Academy, you look at paintings of the former academy members. With each painting, the number of kids grew less and less as if time was making them disappear. You continue to walk around as you eat your sandwich taking in the empty sights. Passing different rooms, memories replayed in your mind so strongly that it was like you were right there in them again. You could practically see and hear the Hargreeves kids running down the halls and fighting with each other in those dumb uniforms they used to wear but you knew those experiences were just in your mind. This building had become a haunted house filled with the ghosts of past memories that would never come back. Looking outside at the snowy scene you decide to brave the elements and head out to the courtyard. This time instead of frantically looking for signs of life you take in the sight of death. You make your way over to the statue of what looks to be an older version of Ben. The statue has a solemn look on its face as it looks down on you.

"I guess you're the only one left here." You comment to the statue

You got no response. You didn't expect one but it was worth a shot. You looked down at the pedestal the statue was on and read the epitaph.

May the darkness within you find peace in the light

You wrote that to him in the journal you gave him for all of your 13th birthdays. Things really had changed while you were gone. With the cold starting to set in, you head back inside and go stand in the parlor next to the fireplace. Looking up at the painting of Five once more, a mix of emotions started churning inside you. Anger, grief, confusion, hurt. All of them overwhelmed you.

"You know this is all your fault Five." You start to rant to the painting "If you hadn't gotten mad about whatever it was you were mad about neither of us would be in this situation."

You pace back and forth in front of the fireplace, your feelings of hurt and anger growing stronger like the flames before you. You continue to yell louder at the painting in front of you,

"Oh leave me alone (Y/N) you wouldn't get it. Bullshit! Do you see what you've done? Look at me! I have no family, no home, no friends, nothing because of you and your stupid superiority complex! All of it is gone! Do you hear me?"

By this point, you were actively staring down the painting, pointing and screaming at it,

"I HAVE NOTHING! NOTHING BECAUSE OF YOU! I LOST EVERYTHING AND THAT INCLUDES MY BEST FRIEND! HOW DARE YOU FIVE! HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Child, yelling at the painting is not going to console your grief." You hear a voice say from behind you

Turning around you find Mr. Hargreeves to be standing there.

"Why do you keep the painting up then?" You retort crossing your arms

"I keep it up to remember the boy." he answers, "I told him not to mess with time travel but he refused to listen."

"He thought he was better than everyone." You comment

"He thought he was better than most people, not all, but most." Reginald replies "Now if you're going to be staying here there are going to be rules that you need to follow."

"Who said I was staying here?" You remark

"You have other accommodations?" He questions

You let out a huff.

"No." you reply annoyed

It was true, you had nowhere else to go and this was probably your only chance of having a home of sorts. You heard the stories of what it was like to live with Reginald and although you didn't want to, you knew that you had no other choice.

"Very well. I will have Pogo inform you of the daily schedule of eating, training, and studying."

"Slow your roll old man, training?" you question raising an eyebrow

"Of course. To develop your powers." He responds blankly

"Listen, if I'm going to live here and have to deal with your rules then I have some conditions. First, I will train my powers and let you research them but do NOT expect me to put on a little uniform and become the only member of the second class of the Umbrella Academy. That's not happening. Second, if you want me to learn something it will wait until the weekend because during the week I want to go to school. Third, I have autonomy of where I go both inside and outside this house. I am not going to live my life solely in one bedroom. Do I make myself clear?" You demand

"I see time hasn't dulled that sharp tongue and insolent attitude of yours." Reginald remarks

"Well what eleven years is to you has been like two hours to me." you retort

"Fine. I agree with your conditions and the schedule will be adjusted accordingly but you MUST stick to it and the house rules or I will not tolerate your requests further." Reginald replies

"Deal." You state curtly

"I'll have Grace deal with your living accommodations. Now keep quiet."

"One more thing. You got his eyes wrong, they're a brighter blue." You say gesturing to the painting of Five

Reginald turns to walk away and you flop down on the couch. This is not what you expected when you woke up that morning...eleven years ago. All of it was still so surreal and you didn't know what to do. So you did nothing, you just laid on the couch staring at the ceiling silently and let the world pass by as it had done already. You didn't notice how much time had gone by until you heard Grace call out,

"(Y/N)!"

"I'm here." You reply sitting up from the couch

"Mr. Hargreeves told me that you're going to be staying with us. I'm so happy to hear that! Now I have the pleasure of being able to take care of you too!" She says happily "Let's get you situated!"

Grace and you walk upstairs and into the hall that housed the former rooms of the children.

"You can pick whichever room you want!" Grace explains "Allison's room is all set up in terms of having girlier items, and Vanya's room is smaller but it's barren so you can decorate it however you want! Luther and Ben's rooms are super organized! We can always redo Klaus or Diego's rooms and there's always Fi-"

"I'll take a look at the rooms and let you know." You quickly shoot out

Grace gives you a slightly shocked look before smiling and saying,

"Oh alright, I'm going to make dinner then. Just let me know before bedtime so I can get some clean sheets for you."

You didn't mean to cut off Grace but Five's room was the only room you didn't check earlier. Going in there wasn't something you were prepared to do right now and it definitely wasn't the one you were going to stay in. It would hurt too much, not only because of all the memories made in there but because it looked right across at your old room which was now frozen in time. Passing the closed door of Five's room you walk down the hall and carefully examine all the other options. You saw that Allison and Luther had two of the largest rooms, and you were surprised you couldn't find a hole cut in their shared wall to secretly enter each others. Nevertheless, Luther had only left recently so you didn't want his room and Allison's room had too much of her stuff in it and you knew even with rearranging you couldn't make it feel like your own. Making your way down the hall you saw Vanya's barren room but decided against it because it was too small. Klaus' room was too messy even though he hadn't been there for years and you felt weird about staying in Ben's room since it was still his when he passed away. All that was left was Diego's room. It wasn't as large as Luther or Allison's but it wasn't as small as Vanya's. You still felt a little awkward about taking it but out of all the options it was the best choice. Hearing a bell ring you went down to the dining room for dinner. Mr. Hargreeves was already there standing behind his seat at the head of the table. You stood behind the seat at the opposite head.

"Sit." He commanded

You sat down and Grace dished out food for both you and Mr. Hargreeves. The dinner was silent, the only sounds were that of the silverware clanking against your plates. When finished you excused yourself from the table. As you were walking away Grace asked,

"Did you pick a room?"

"Ah yes, I'll be staying in Diego's room." You answer

"Well it's not Diego's room anymore silly, it's yours! I'll go get some fresh sheets for the bed."

As you head to Diego's room you quickly get an idea to try and make the room more of your own. Transporting yourself to your old room you grab three items before transporting yourself back to the academy. As you approach Diego's room with the items in your arms you see that Grace had finished making the bed. Entering, you place the items on the desk. The diary replica that your parents gave you, the music box, and the teddy bear that Five gave you. It wasn't much but the items comforted you. Putting on a pair of pajamas you got ready for bed. As you pulled the bedsheets down Grace appeared behind you in the doorway and said,

"Goodnight (Y/N), sleep well."

She started to walk away when you called out,

"Grace?"

"Yes (Y/N)?" she replies

"Do you- do you think you could tuck me in?"

You saw as her expression was both happy and sad in a way. Like there was a piece missing that you somehow filled with that question.

"Of course," She replied a smile coming on to her face

You got into the bed and Grace happily tucked you in. Pulling the covers a top of she couldn't help but feel a sense of completeness that she lost years ago. The house had been so empty since all the kids left, but now she had someone to take care of and although the circumstances were less than great for you she wanted to make sure that she could give you the best. Quietly, she turned the light off and closed the door so you could fall asleep.

After that day the Hargreeves house had become your home. Over the next month, you moved most of your stuff from your old room to your new one. Having your stuff helped to make the transition easier although it also made you miss your past. To pass the time, you religiously wrote in the replica diary about each day but instead of writing dear diary for each entry, you wrote Dear Five. You hoped that if he came back one day you could give him the diary to read about what you were up to so it was like he was always there with you. With some help, you got enrolled in school but wouldn't start until after winter break. Even as you settled into the routine of training and living, you still felt all the emotions that you had that first day. You knew you wouldn't get over them immediately but you wished you had a better outlet. Going to Grace one day you asked her,

"Grace, do you have any ideas on how to get these negative feelings out in a healthy way? I know they won't go away but I'm hoping I can make them less strong."

"Hmm. Well if you put the energy that you spend on those feelings into different activities it might help. You could play the piano again or you can take up a physical sport. I heard boxing is really good for taking negative energy out." Grace responds "Actually I think there is a boxing club in the area. How about you check it out tomorrow?"

"Alright, I can try that. Do you think they're open though, it is Christmas Eve." You reply

"If my knowledge is correct, this one is open 365 days a year." Grace replies

You nodded and once you had figured out where it was you put on exercise clothes. Grace bundled you up in a warm jacket and with that, you walked your way over to the boxing club. Entering you approached a desk where an old man sat.

"Hi, I'd like to learn to box." You say

"You're a little small to learn, don't you think?" He replies

"I have a hundred dollars that say I'm not too small." You state holding up the bill

"Can't argue with that." The old man says taking the cash

He escorts you over to a punching bag.

"Wait here, I'll get you someone to teach you." He says before turning his attention "Hey Kraken, get your ass over here. I need you to teach this kid."

Slowly a man steps out of the boxing ring where he was practicing and walks over to where you and the old man are. The old man walks away as the younger man takes off his gear. He says,

"Hey, I'm-"

But he stops abruptly. The man just stares at you blankly.

"Are you okay?" You ask

"Sorry, you look like someone I used to know." He says

Something about this man felt familiar but you couldn't place it. The man sticks out his hand to shake yours. You go to shake it but when you look down at his wrist he has an all too familiar marking there, a tattoo of an umbrella in a circle. You look at the tattoo before looking up again at the man and start to recognize the features of the boy you used to know, now all grown up.

"Diego?" you question softly

"H-h-how did you know my name?" He stutters

"I knew it because you do know me. It's me, (Y/N)," you reply softly

You can see the confusion on his face turn into a softer expression. Although it might not have been evident to his other siblings, Diego was a deeply emotional person and you saw that exact look you were seeing in his eyes many times before when you two were younger.

"No. It can't be. You look exactly the same, you should be my age" He questions, the emotion on his face becoming more evident

"Accidentally traveling through time will do that to you. Please you have to believe me Eggo." You begged

He was having doubts that it was truly you but that all went away when you called him that name. It was a dumb nickname you gave him when one time Luther refused to let go of him. You kept exclaiming "let go my eggo" as you tried to use your powers to get Luther off. No one else but you ever knew of that. Tears formed in Diego's eyes but quickly after he wrapped his arms around you and picked you up.

"Hey everyone! My sister is back! We thought she went missing but she's back!" Diego exclaims to the people in the boxing club

There are some cheers and congratulations shouted from across the gym as Diego puts you back down. For so long he hoped that you would come back and now here you were like a Christmas miracle. You were more like a sibling to him in the short amount of time he knew you than his own siblings were. Instead of learning to box the two of you talked. You explained everything that you had gone through and your current living situation. He didn't like that you were living in that house with his father but he knew that he didn't have the means to house you nor properly take care of you. One thing he did know is that he was going to make sure that after all this misery you could have a better life. Even though time had gone on and he was older now you were still like a sister to him but now you were his little sister and he was determined to protect you from any harm the world might throw your way. He was going to be the best older brother he could be to you and make sure that you would not have to face the life he did.

And so for the next five years, Diego was there for every important moment in your life, always trying to support you and make it better. He dropped you off on your first day of school when spring semester rolled around and every first day after. He went to every piano recital you had and sat front row. When there was a father-daughter dance fundraiser he went to make sure you weren't alone. He trained you and coached you in boxing and was there for every single match. He planned a huge sweet 16 birthday party using what money he had. He was the one who took you on your first college visits when you were 17. He took time out of his days to practice working on your powers. For everything, he was there and on top of that, he regularly took you out of the house to spend time with you. You were his little sister, his true sister and he wanted you to know it.

Along with everything Diego did for you, you were grateful for some of the things you had gotten in the Hargreeves house. After about a year or so you stopped calling Grace by her name and started to call her mom. If androids could cry tears of joy Grace would have the first time that word left your mouth. Pogo had convinced Reginald to get you a piano play and in an odd act of kindness, he did. Along with that, your powers developed greatly under the supervision of Reginald and Pogo. You were able to do more in terms of manipulating the molecules in the world around you and were able to start seeing disturbances in them as well. Life wasn't perfect but through the years it got easier. But although you were growing up and trying to move on with your life, even after all those years Five never left your mind for a second. You missed him greatly and hated that the last words the two of you shared were ones of anger. You wondered if he was still mad at you. Each moment of every day Five still consumed your mind and you hoped that wherever he was, in another time and place, that he was doing okay and that one day he would come back to you.

Check out the side story here:

The Missing Five Years - “Lost In The Past” Side story

Taglist: @xplrreylo @joebob15274 @insatiable-ivy @fruitsaladtree @angelpeachamber @academy-umbrella @lizziel1410 @ir3neeee @faith-quake @aliens-with-colas @eddiomyspaghettio @lady-celeste25 @im-dead-and-hurting @nerdypinupcrystal @cherry-ki-d @anapocalypseinmymind @vicassa @2cuteforyourlies @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @cheshire-salvatore-mikaelson @shadowycreationcupcake @macaroni-mads @metor-showers1994 @fivehargreevesforthewin @rinko-san @supernovavision @cicilisthebest @flickbix @hi-v-juice @magykal-777 @zosiaduda

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ushibug · 4 years ago

Text

🆂🅸🅻🅻🆈 🅶🅸🆁🅻 - 𝙆𝙖𝙩𝙨𝙪𝙠𝙞 𝘽𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙜𝙤

Summary: Bakugo Katsuki was immaculate to her, even when he didn’t notice one bit. Her ideology of him drove her to a pathetic pit of pitifulness.

Warnings: !!ANGST!! emotional issues, low self esteem issues, etc.

Song: Silly Girl by Chloe Moriondo

‼️SPOILERS AHEAD FOR BNHA MOVIE (2) AND RECENT CHAPTERS IN THE MANGA‼️

A/N: This was a blurb and the over use of the word “perfect.” :) enjoy <REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!>

𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝

𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝

Katsuki Bakugo had an unkempt personality. Loud, aggressive, and always sour. His voice poured into anyone’s eardrums like honey, wanting, or unwanting.

On the playing field he was the strongest, always tried at least. And it felt like you always were watching his back 10 steps behind, but it didn’t matter when all you could be thankful for is that this angle allowed you to watch him.

And to you, when looking up at Bakugo Katsuki, laid a path of flowers behind him - so why not follow the prettiest route to reach him?

𝐈 𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐝

It was sickly how much Katsuki Bakugo consumed your thoughts. How could so a hectic being be so wanting within your head?

Nobody would ever know though. It was your little secret only you and your pillow knew when you’d create scenarios and squeal into it.

Or when tears shed for him.

Whatever the reason the disease of Katsuki Bakugou had invaded your brain, it was nice to dream such pleasant dreams of him. Making you want him more. And hope, that one day, he’d look at you the way you want him too.

𝐂𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈’𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

𝐈𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐝 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭

𝐂𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞

You always knew the system was questionable. Children trained to fight, you suppose everyone had their reason...

It wasn’t until the first attack - when you saw how broken everyone was. Bags under their eyes, walking mindlessly around the dorms, the silent cries. Mina slipping into your room in the middle of the night to sleep or else she’d have nightmares, Kirishima sitting in the corner of the lounge blankly staring off, Deku staring constantly at his scars.

And Bakugo?

Showed nothing. Just stalked into the lounges like his usual self. A grimace on his face.

Pity shown through his eyes, you could tell. But he did nothing to comfort the broken students.

You wondered if he’d been affected at all.

“Weakness isn’t something the number 1 hero has.” You remember him belt out once in one of his common outbursts in class.

Guess he was the perfect hero then. He was always perfect in your eyes.

𝐒𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬

𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞

𝐎𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨

After countless thoughts and dreams of Katsuki Bakugo, you made sure to always be a good classmate to him. Agreeing to his words, listening closely in his rambles, cheering him on when needed.

And when he walks into your math class, smiling at him when he sits at the assigned desk beside you. He never looks at you though, always looking straight ahead and sitting down with a boom.

So then the next day you say in a shy whisper “Good Morning Bakugou.”

And he’d once again not turn to you, just nod acknowledgment. But what’s a hero with no determination? And determination was driving you to make him see you.

But how pitiful you were.

“Extra. Hey. Dumbass. You with the ring.”

Your head turned to see who Bakugo was speaking with, only to be met with gorgeous velvet eyes. This made your heart race and ears turn hot.

“Me?” You whispered back. He only rolled his eyes and nodded. “I forgot to grab my pencil case from shitty hair, can you give me one?” He grumbled out, annoyed like he was the one who was being asked for a pencil. You complied neatly, grabbing your best pencil, making sure it was sharp and clean, and passing it to him so delicately. He grabbed it harshly and muttered thanks.

“My name is actually-”

“I don’t care extra.”

𝐈’𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

𝐈𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐝 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭

𝐔𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞

You wished you’d always be content with watching Bakugou back. You wished you stayed happy always seeing him take more steps forwards than everyone else.

But you were an aspiring hero too. And you’d do anything to achieve those top ranks. Anything to be not behind him, or in front of him - but beside him.

So you added extra training, extra runs, asked anyone for an extra brawl. Whatever it would take to make sure you had a place, to showcase you were meant to be there.

Then why can’t you breathe? Why are spitting blood while gripping your burnt chest? Why are you kneeling pitifully in front of Katsuki Bakugo? For a moment, a miserable moment, you thought you could fight him. Keep him on his toes. Prove to him what you were capable of. That’s how you ended on the ground while everyone watched.

But you didn’t want to see their faces, you wanted to see his. Regrettably, you did, your eyes met his velvet ones. The ones that made a shade of red your favorite color. The ones that were in slits, glaring with a scowl on his lips. Disappointment, no, no, it was his realization of how useless you were.

God, he was impeccable, he never lost. And when he did, it was unnoticed because he’d get back to stronger. More rage held in his fist and more strength in his kicks.

“You look stupid down there. Get up.” He spits out before turning on his heels, walking away from the small battle ring. Leaving you to wallow in the realization that you’ll never get even a step closer to Bakugo Katsuki in this world.

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞?

Bakugo never looked your way. Never even acknowledged your presence. And who could blame him?

Who would be mad at him for doing so when you laid in the rubble of an island you were supposed to protect, useless.

You were thankful though to see such a phenomenal scene as Deku and Bakugo painted the sky with such colors. It was truly amazing, he was amazing. Sheer strength and power.

You felt pathetic. Useless and unworthy. All these emotions flooding in as you continued watching while You laid in rubble, adrenaline, and shock keeping you awake to watch this phenomenon of two heroes. You wondered if anyone else was watching what your eyes were seeing. If anyone else is laying woefully in failure like you and looking up to the sky.

If not, this was sure a secret you’d take to the grave if you had to.

You questioned what was going through their heads at this moment, what an odd thought but curiosity of the mind always intrigued you. Do their hands tremble slightly too when knowing everything lays in their power to overcome? Do doubts crawl desperately to the front when they miss an opportunity to strike? Do they also think they aren’t able to achieve what they must?

Of course not. They aren’t you. They aren't insecure, fragile minded heroes like you. Who couldn’t even get fucking back up after falling into a deep pit of broken down rubble of some rocks? It hurts so much.

Bakugo would be so angry seeing you in this state. Questioning you if you even belonged within the hero course. But he had to know you kept fighting, you were still fighting. Fighting the pain, fighting to keep your eyes open, fighting just to make sure he was going to beat this villain.

Fighting the voice that screamed ever so loudly all your apprehensions about everything you’ve ever done. He would never want you. He won’t ever look at you unless it’s with disgust.

But you were desperate, so so desperate to be noticed, seen, known that you were strong enough to exist. So with a deep, painful breath and anything you could muster with a rib stabbing into your lung, you made it known.

“GO MIDORIYA.” One more breath, please just one more. “GO BAKUGO.”

𝐈’𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

𝐈𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐝 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭

𝐂𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞

𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭

𝐂𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞

It felt like clawing, ripping at any sort of opening within this dark room you had fallen trapped within.

He was the perfect silhouette to become a hero. Besides his anger, he no doubt was someone who could save millions in the near future.

You idolized him, created this ideology that he was beyond compare. That nothing could break the Bakugo Katsuki. Even when it came to comparing him between Midorya, Todoroki, and Tokayami, he was ideal.

He was so ideal that it was a shock when Shigarki’s quirk impaled him. Making you scream in distraught and watch Deku push himself further into this self-destructed rage. Bakugo Katsuki could not fall, yet there he laid. Panting, wheezing as he held onto his stomach on the ground. The battle continues just mere feet ahead.

Your feet moved faster than your brain could process, rushing to be the first beside Bakugo, to drag him further from the prominent danger ahead. “Bakugo?! Keep putting pressure, eyes open okay?” Your arms scooping his neck, making sure a grip was on his shoulder as you pulled his body to shelter behind a piece of a building.

You realized Bakugou was human. A human who bled and felt pain. A human who cried when overwhelmed and scared. A human who could die. “Y/N, I-I don’t wanna die. I can’t die, I have to fight.”

He finally used your name. It should’ve felt good, amazing to be known. Though the way his voice cracked, throat hissing to function made your heart to drown in sorrow. Bakugo Katsuki was a scared boy, crying in your hands as blood pooled around him and swelled in his mouth. “Katsuki you won’t die, that would be the cause of weakness and remember what you said, weakness isn’t something the number 1 hero has...okay?” It was a jumble of words, something to guide him into assurance as you accessed the damages to his vital organs. To make sure any more blood wasn’t lost you had to pick up the red rag left by someone during this battle, pressing it down to his stomach, making him cry out in agony. fuck fuck fuck. “Where the fuck are the pro heroes?!” You screamed, eyes stinging at this situation. Eyes stinging because Bakugo Katsuki’s eyes were closing and breath was shallow. Eyes stinging because a boy laid limp in front of you. A boy who was supposed to become number 1.

“Please wake up... Bakugo? Please? Common you have too. You’re supposed to be the perfect hero, so please wake up! PLEASE.”

#MHA SPOILERS AHEAD #bnha imagines #bakugou x reader #bakugo x you #katsuki bakugo headcanons #katsuki bakugo imagine #katsuki x y/n #bakugo katsuki x reader #mha x y/n #mha x you #bnha x you #bnha x reader #my hero academy fanfiction #my hero academia imagines #boku no hero headcanons #boku no hero imagines #bnha fanfiction #bnha headcanons #deku x reader

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b4kuqo · 4 years ago

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just my thoughts on how i feel about the wonder boys & bakugo. this is completely my own view, i’m not saying that these have to be the case. i’m not good with words either so if i sound illiterate, i’m sorry lmfao.

feel free to read. i’m just chattin’

okay so, one thing i’ve noticed is that

midoriya focuses on becoming a hero to save.

bakugo focuses on becoming a hero to win.

at the end of the day both want to be strong heros who end up victorious. though each of their desires are slightly different due to what they’re mainly focusing on when defeating a villain.

bakugo and midoriya both looked up to all might as children. keep in mind, they’re so fucking young at the time. even so they both admire the strong man, each of them seem to have a different perspective of the hero. bakugo, focusing more on all might’s physical aspects (him being strong and beating ass to win).

and midoriya focusing more on his mental aspects (the want to save people with a smile. just felt like i had to add that ‘with a smile’ lmaooo)

but at the end of the day, they both want to be a hero. just as midoriya said in the movie,

a slight difference, but nonetheless the same.

and knowing that, makes constantly think of this panel.

like i said, bakugo’s mindset is more of.. you must be strong to win.

and midoriya looked up to that. his strength and his desire and will to become even stronger. as a quirkless boy, he couldn’t help but admire this boy his age that oozed with such a strong ass vibe. ik y’all remember when katsuki beat those older kids asses too, shiii i’d look up to him too

to midoriya, you do what you must to save.

being strong is beneficial, but he cares about saving lives the most. makes sense since he was quirkless whilst trying to save bakugo when being attacked by a sludge monster villain thingy. he tried to save his childhood friend nonetheless even so the lack of his power.

he has a good heart. he has good intentions.

and that’s what bakugo fears

or just cannot stand. (in the panel)

and i may have a understanding as to why all might thinks such a way.

in season 4, i forgot which epsiode, bakugo says something that catches my eye. he speaks on how he was raised.

of course this contributes to the story of himself and how it affects midoriya and his’ relationship. we all know the sad past between the two boys. to put it shortly, bakugo constantly terrorized and bullied midoriya. firstly, let’s focus on why this could’ve occurred. apparently bakugo wasn’t always so hotheaded when young, and that should be able to be determined by the information in this panel.

when bakugo first got his quirk, everybody was hyping him up. i think it got him geeking fr 💀 well he WAS a child at the time, i don’t expect him to be that humble of his flashy quirk. most kids love attention. and it caused him to become very confident. a little bit cocky as well. he believed he was so strong at the time. and of course those around him hyping him up had a influence on that attitude he gained.

now with that improval of others and with the ability to finally control this flashy quirk, he still had that dream. that dream to be a strong hero like all might. a strong hero that wins. and with that realization, he became more cockier by the fucking minute i’m looking at u middle school bitchsuki.

and with all the praise from others, who would look down on katsuki? who could’ve?

apparently, midoriya.

it was all just a misunderstanding. but remember, they’re young. they’re simple minded.

i’m not saying that makes everything that happened fine, but you must take the time and reasoning into consideration.

as the strongest, bakugo seemed to think that he doesn’t need help. if he gets helped, he isn’t strong. he couldn’t handle it himself. if he couldn’t handle it himself, he couldn’t win. and once he fell off that log and midoriya dared to raise out his hand to help the boy who fell, their different perspective clashes against each other.

bakugo immediately thought he was looking down on him. his childish mind went straight pass the fact that a friend was simply trying to assist him. that’s what made it so childish. he didn’t want that assistance. he thought it wasn’t needed, especially not with the power he had. not with the strength in general he had. not if he was going to be the number 1 hero who defeats all. and it caused him to overlook midoriya’s kindness.

bakugo was worrying about being strong.

strength. the thing that quirkless midoriya admired

midoriya was worrying about his friend.

being kind. the thing that bakugo didn’t really get due to focusing so much on his perspective.

he saw it in a whole different view. the fact that midoriya was quirkless, didn’t make it any better for bakugo. that just made it even more insulting to him.

and so, the bullying began.

back to what i stated about the way bakugo was raised, i think if he wasn’t raised based on solving things with violence.. he wouldn’t have bullied midoriya. especially because he’d be more vulnerable and would speak rather than resolving in being physical.

just showing this scene to show y’all how violence is truly what he resolves too. it’s how he releases shit.

amyways, notice how even so those little back up buddies of bakugo’s praised him too, but didn’t help him. yet out of the kindess of midoriya.. even so he praises him as well, he wants to help bakugo. he knows he’s strong, but he still wants to help. cause he cares about him.

and i don’t think bakugo was used to that. (bakugo seemed to grow up on “tough love.” i do believe mitsuki loves him, but he’s clearly a mama’s boy and .. mama a lil’ bit violent. just how he was raised. midoriya is more filled with strictly LOVE without the tough.)

which also causes him to react how he reacts.

and as all might said, bakugo feared his heart.

in this world, we often fear things we tend to not understand.

bakugo didn’t understand why’d he constantly chase after him. he didn’t understand how midoriya strived and wished to be a hero even so he was quirkless. he didn’t understand midoriya’s sweetness and thoughtfulness. he didn’t understand why midoriya would treat him this way and because he didn’t get it, on his own he determined it was just a way to belittle him.

bakugo didn’t understand.

and though it took him a while, it honestly make sense how he’s growing into a more mature mindset at the moment. i myself was still childish just as bakugo during middle school. it was only until high school, i improved my mindset.

people are so focused on what occurs but don’t look as to WHY this may occur. it sucks yeah, we know. but, that’s what makes the story so intriguing and realistic. this HAPPENS in real life.

personally, i went through this growing up. it’s sad to say but i heavily relate to bakugo and his attitude and actions. not proud of it, but that’s why his character seems so understandable to me.

bakugo could preach how much he hates midoriya, but he doesn’t.

we all say shit we don’t mean.

there’s more than what the eye just sees.

bakugo’s actions say so much more than just the shit he spouts.

he’s all “blah blah blah fuck deku,” til deku is FUCKED and bouta die.. then it’s all AYOWUSSGOINONIWASJUSTPLAYIN—

LIKE BOOOOY U DO TOO MUCH UUUGH 😩😩

anyways their story is so complex. and i have so much more to say but it’s so hard to explain.

anyways, i love them. i really really love them.

#bakudeku #izuku midoriya #bakugo katsuki #bkdk #the wonder duo #bnha

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scenarioslovers · 4 years ago

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Our Sin >> Jungkook, You (Part 4)

PLEASE READ ME FIRST : PART 1| PART 2 |PART 3

Once upon a time, three friends loved each other very much, people thought they could pass as siblings. They promised to always stay loyal and never hurt each other no matter what. They promised to stay friends and never let anything ruin what they had for each other. Jungkook, Minju, and Y/N.

Two girls and one boy.

They swore that they wouldn’t fight over love because being together the three of them was the perfect calculation to have existed. Y/N fought her demons and hide her feelings for the boy who brightened up her life and gave her hope to keep going and face life. She couldn’t betray her friend’s trust and let such unwanted feelings to ruin everything.

That was until the last year of high school. When Jungkook and Minju came while holding hands.

Y/N tried so hard to deny all the signs. They could never betray her like this. They all swore on their friendship. However, Minju was blushing and wouldn’t meet her friend’s eyes. Jungkook was braver but he was shy to admit the truth. That they were already in love, leaving her alone, and totally ignoring her feelings.

Their hands will not break free.

Jungkook stuttering trying to form words. It was Minju who broke the silence and awkward moment. “Y/N, sorry. we can’t keep that from you for so long... we are dating.”

Y/N smiled faintly, trying so hard to hide the pain and tears from her eyes. Her efforts to keep the promised gone to air but she had to work harder for the friendship to never go away.

She couldn’t lose two of her friends, just because she is foolishly in love with someone who was in love with someone else.

“I knew it.” A forced chuckle skipped her mouth. “I already knew you would do that eventually. Congratulations, my friends.”

“Aren’t you mad?” Jungkook asked. A hint of surprise rose in his voice.

“I am happy for you.” Y/N nodded at her friends. “Our friendship is stronger than this. I know it is.”

At that time, the three friends didn’t know that their trip of sins would start.

They didn’t know that breaking that promise back then when they were just young and wild would bring them all the unfortunate events and bad feelings. Lies and breaking promised were a cycle that the three friends didn’t stop doing.

_____________

Two weeks after Y/N left.

Jungkook couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened.

Minju wouldn’t answer his calls and Y/N left for a new start even though he wondered if you would be able to get it. He couldn’t stop thinking about you ever since you Left. He wished he could turn back time and make different decisions.

Like how he shouldn’t have hide after hearing about your pregnancy. He shouldn’t have asked for time to think about it. He knew that he loved you and he was so ready to have a life with you. However, Minju always appeared in his mind like a haunting ghost. Blaming him for stopping loving her when she was ready to fully love him. He thought he loved Minju too.

God, he loved Minju but when he saw your tears his heart ached as if thousands of knives decided to stab him in the heart at the same time with no mercy.

His heart ached for you and only you.

He was just too stupid to realize how important you were in his life before. He thought Minju was the answer.

When he first asked Minju out, Y/N popped in his mind smiling brightly at his silly jokes. He pushed that memory away, back in the days he thought he felt sorry for you, for breaking that silly promise they made for each other. He didn’t want to hurt his childhood friend because he fell in love with her best friend.

Your reaction at that time surprised him, yet put him at ease. Maybe he shouldn’t have thought about it too much. That’s what friends are for.

Nevertheless, he was wrong.

You indeed were hurt considering that now he knew how you felt about him. He hated himself more than anything.

Looking at the ceiling of his room, his eyes fell on the stars you had helped him in decorating his room with before. A small smile formed on his lips as tears blurring his vision. He couldn’t believe he let himself be a coward and lose you in the thin air like this.

A vibration coming from his phone made him threw his body in a sitting position. He caught himself hoping it was from you. However, disappointment yet fear washed over him when he saw the name in capital letters and a heart beside it. MINJU.

--Let’s talk! I don’t like to leave things unfinished.

He knew what she meant from her text. She was breaking up with him. However, the Minju he knows wouldn’t let be unless she heard it from him.

-Meet you in 20 minutes. Our regular place.

Jungkook texted back

--Tsk, I wish you didn’t reply so fast. See you there.

First thing, first, Jungkook was determined to confess all of his sins, but he wasn’t going to ask for forgiveness. As the person who should hear it could no longer receive it.

__________________

Everyone deserves a chance to start a new life that was meant to change from them. And that was your decision when you left your best friend; who now hate to hear your name and the one whom you truly love.

They say if you have a guy friend you should never ever fall in love with them. Now, you knew why. Simply you didn’t just lose your long time crush, you lost your secret keeper and the one who tried his best to be a good friend.

A part of you didn’t want to take the whole blame, however you decided to be the bad one when you decided to get rid of the baby.

You wanted to erase everything. It pained you so much to look in the mirror and think of the possibility that you could have been a mother.

You wrote the bad things you did for the past year in a white thin paper. Wanting to let them go and you wrote each one of them, thinking of the mess you cause because of it.

You looked at the list one more time:

1- Slept with my best friend’s ex who is my close friend

2- lied to Minju

3- lied to jungkook

4- got pregnant

5- Took advantage of Jungkook in the loneliest moment in his life.

6- truly loved Jungkook knowing he didn’t love me and cared for Minju

7- I killed the baby

Whipping away the tears that started running down your cheeks, you crumbled the paper with your fist and threw it into the sea.

Today, after this moment, you will live only for yourself. You didn’t deserve to be a girlfriend to anyone or even a mom ever again.

You looked at the paper as it sank slowly into the deep blue water and disappeared. As you no longer could see it, you took a deep breath and promised yourself never to cry again or think about your sins ever. You were going to start a life that was only for yourself.

___________________

Three years later

“Teacher! Can you help me?”

One of your students approached you with a notebook as you were looking through the windows to the sea view beside the school. The cute little girl was more than four years old. You couldn’t help but think that your baby would have been as old as she was or a little younger. The girl was wearing a yellow dress that was filled with flowers everywhere. It made her look like an angel with her hair tied up into two ponies on each side. She was smiling at you excitedly as she pushed her notebook toward you. She was only four years old yet she cared so much about her art and classwork.

“Let me see, Hana.” You kneeled beside her as you opened her notebook. Her handwriting was huge and messy. You found them cute. Sometimes you secretly took pictures of your students' handwriting as a memory for you to keep. However, what Hana showed you, wasn’t an art or classwork. You looked at her handwriting in awe as you smiled so widely from ear to ear. She wrote you a letter.

I love you, teacher Y/N. You are the best teacher and I want to be like you when I grow up. You are cool and pretty. You are the best.

“Are you crying, Teacher?” Hana looked concerned as tears started to form in her eyes too.

You whipped the tears with the back of your hands so quickly as you shook your head, and laughed so that Hana stop making that sad face. “I am happy. Very happy, thank you, Hana.”

“You can take the paper. It is yours.” Hana said as she ripped the paper with the letter out of her notebook before running back to her class.

Working with kids, changed you a lot. After you decided to start all over again a new life, you moved to Jeju island and applied to be a kindergarten teacher. Fortunately, you got the job and you have been living a calm life ever since.

You folded the letter and put it in your bag. You had a box filled with love letters from your students. They were all so cute and loved to show love everywhere they go. These small letters like a cheer up treat to your lonely nights. Whenever thoughts and bad memories haunt your dreams, you would wake up to read all of them without getting tired.

When all the kids went home, you decided to go to the market instead of going home right away. You needed to shop for groceries as your fridge started to be empty.

Since Jeju island is so small, people knew each other. And living for three years in this small island made it easier for people to know you. Every shop vendor greeted you happily as the offered to show you their new products and goods. Everyone was kind to you and made you feel welcomed.

“Good afternoon, Y/N.” The fruit shop grandpa greeted you as you approached his shop.

“Grandpa, do you have apples?” You asked as you looked around for it. “I can’t see them.”

“They are inside, I changed their place as they keeping falling around everywhere.” He laughed as he explained how old he was for him to run after a rolling apple.

“You are still young, grandpa.” You complimented him and he cheered in confidence.

“You, young children, know what to say.” He handed you your apples and you paid him before turning around.

At that moment, the world started to tie up around you. Your lungs forgot how to breathe as you caught sight of the thing you wanted to avoid for as long as you were alive. Why are they here? Questions filled your mind and only one answered popped in your head.

RUN.

You turned so fast the other way around. It was so fast that you didn’t notice someone was behind you. You bumped into the fruit shop grandson, who had a crush on you. However, his strong arms held you in place, protecting you for accidents. “Y/N!” He exclaimed happily. He was so loud that blood went cold into your veins. When he noticed the horror in your eyes he looked at you worriedly. “Is something wrong?”

“I have to go. Talk to you later, Dojoon-shi” and started to walk as fast as you could. Dojoon called after you as you fastened your pace and started to run.

Why are they here out of all the places? What are they doing? They seemed like they are still together. Your chest tightened and your vision blurred as your legs wouldn’t stop.

Jungkook and Minju were in Jeju island. Minju was holding into Jungkook’s arm as he was looking at a necklace from the accessory lady.

The burning in your chest wouldn’t stop. When you reached home, you kicked your shoes away and walked straight to your room. Hands in hair, you pulled into it as you couldn’t stop thinking. Finally, after three years you learned how to move on. Did they come here looking for you? Is it coincident? How did they make up?

A part of you was happy that they could manage to stay together. Another part of you was broken over the fact that you had become the one who couldn’t be forgiven.

“Good for them.” You murmured to yourself. “At least now you can live without feeling guilty. You didn’t ruin their relationship at least.”

__________

“Jungkook, look at this beautiful necklace,” Minju said as she grabbed Jungkook’s arm as she stopped by a lady who was selling jewelry. The necklace charm took a heart shape with a moon and a star inside of it. Jungkook looked at it and couldn’t help but think of Y/N. A moon and a star. Two things that matched well with Y/N’s personality. She was the moon and the star that guided him during his darkest days. He felt her absence when she was gone. Technically she was around him as long as he could ever remember.

“It would look good on, Y/N,” Minju said, reading Jungkook’s expression.

Jungkook’s eyes widened in surprise. Was he thinking out loud?

“It would look good on you too.”

“Eh, stop lying. It also reminded me of her the moment I saw it.” Minju sighed as she looked away from Jungkook. “Did you use to have the same expression while thinking of me?”

Jungkook groaned and Minju laughed. “Minju!”

“You didn’t have to protest like this. I am hurt.”

“Do you think we will find her?” Jungkook’s eyes were full of worry and anxiety.

“Emma said she saw her multiple times while she was on vacation here,” Minju said, shaking her head. “That only means one thing. She moved in her and lied to you.”

“Would she be happy to see me?”

“I—”

“Y/N!!!”

Before Minju could answer, a man shouted a name too familiar and unique to ignore. Minju and Jungkook snapped their head towards the voice. Only to find a man standing in the middle of the street, looking annoyed and sad and no one was in front of him.

Jungkook looked at Minju whose eyes grew in excitement. At least this could be the confirmation they need to know that their search wasn't a waste of time.

Jungkook walked over to the man, he looked around the same age as him. A small burn feeling rose in his chest. “Excuse me, do you know Y/N?”

“Teacher Y/N?” He looked behind him then back at Jungkook. “Yes, and who are you?”

“Her best friend,” Minju answered instead as she reached out for a handshake. “We are looking for Y/N. Can you help us?”

_____________

You couldn’t sleep last night, those dark circles were more visible than ever. Your skin was pale and dehydrated. You reached for a bottle of water as you gulped it down in one sip. You no longer wanted to go out of your house. Jeju Island was so small that there was a huge chance to run into them again. However, you still had a job and a life to live. Until when were you going to keep running away?

With a determined mind, you walked into your bedroom to get ready for a new day. It didn’t matter if you run into them. If that happened you would greet them with a smile, congrats them for being together again, and go on with your life that you choose to live. Or maybe...

Keep avoiding them.

The school you worked in was a few minutes away from your house. You liked to walk there every day as a form of daily exercise. People greeted you as you walked the streets. Elders, children, and young people, everyone was smiling at you, throwing random questions in your direction.

“How is your day, Teacher Y/N?”

“Have a nice day, Y/N”

“You will visit our shop today right?”

After a few seconds, the school gate started to appear. Two figures were standing by the gate. As you walked closer, the figures started to come clearer, colors became more vibrant, and the facial feature was stronger. You stopped in your place as you looked at your old friends. Jungkook was leaning on the wall, he seemed to be in deep thoughts while Minju stood in front of him, talking nonstop. They were standing in front of your school, probably waiting for you. Or why would they be here out of all places?

“Teacher. Y/N, why are you hiding behind a tree?” You looked down at the voice, to find Hana. Her small hands holding the strips of her back bag tightly as she looked at you with curious eyes.

“SHUSH!” You put an index to your mouth as you gestured for her to leave.

“Aren’t you going inside, Teacher Y/N?” She was unnecessarily too loud.

Glancing at Jungkook and Minju’s direction, your breath caught in your chest. They were looking at your direction. You took a deep breath before sighing slowly.

“Hana, darling, go inside or you will miss school.” You said to Hana as Jungkook and Minju walked towards you. “Please, Hana. I will follow you shortly.”

Hana huffed before walking to the school gate. Minju waved to her but Hana ignored her and kept walking to her destination.

“Are all your student brats?” Minju exclaimed as she stopped in front of you, beside her was jungkook who wouldn’t meet your eyes.

“Why are you here?” You asked and it sounded like you were annoyed.

“Someone kept crying every night missing you. It started to annoy me.” Minju sighed as she glanced at Jungkook at thew corner of her eyes. "Plus, that should be our question. What about the UK?"

“Look! I do not know why you are here guys. But I am trying to move on with my life here. Can you please just---?” You sounded harsher than you meant as you gestured for them to leave.

As you started to walk away, a hand reached for your wrist stopping you. You glanced up, to find Jungkook in front of you. Electric waves ran through your arms, reviving all your sensations. That what Jungkook’s touch could always do to you.

“Can we talk?” It was Jungkook’s first words to you. “Please.” The pleading voice and eyes filled with something glittering made you sigh deeply.

“After work. Okay? Wait for me by the cafe around the corner of this street.” You said as you pulled away from his grip. The sensation of his warm hand, still there. Reminding you that this is more real than you thought. “Can you leave now?”

“Let’s go,” Minju said as she locked Jungkook’s arms with hers. You watched as they walked away, bit your lower lip. Why did they come all the way here just to show me how good your relationship became?

This was your chance for a real goodbye. A chance to forgive the sins you all did. A real closure to a friendship that was left hanging on bad terms.

to be continued...

___________________________

IT’S BEEN A WHILE! Hope you liked this part.

#jungkook #bts #kpop scenarios #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #kpop #bangtan boys #bts scenario #jungkook scenario #angst scenario #angst #angst scenarios #jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook #kpop imagines #the rose dojoon #bts angst #jungkook angst #kpop angst

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harryhoney-bee · 5 years ago

Text

I thought parents didn’t have favorites.

anonymous asked: hi! could i request a dad!harry imagine where he favors one child over the other and causes some angst in the family? thanks!

Hope you liked it!

Words count: 2.2k

Angst to Fluff/ Dad!Harry

It was 6 pm, and Y/N was at the kitchen preparing Creamy mushroom pasta for dinner, her children’s favorites, Harry also liked, but not as much as the kids.

“Mom, is dad going to be home soon? I am so excited to show him my drawing!” Maya said while sitting on the couch looking proudly at her colored paper “Do you think he will like it?”

Y/N looked at her with soft eyes “Of course he will honey, is such a beautiful picture.” She goes near her daughter and puts her arm around Maya “My favorite part is the sunflowers in the back, I think it’s gonna be your dad’s favorite part too”.

“Well, I hope so!” Maya says looking happily at her mom.

she was such a beautiful girl, she was kind, smart. Different from her dad, she did not like to be the center of attention, in fact, Y/N and Harry found out she was a little artist just two years ago because she didn’t like others to see her sketches, the poor girl was too insecure about it, but Harry was trying to teach her how to be more confident. She had a lot of talent for twelve-year-old.

Y/N came back to reality when she hears a loud noise coming from downstairs, the basement, where Harry decided to make a little studio for himself, but the one person who was always there wasn’t Harry, but their son, Charlie.

Different from Maya, her brother loved being in the spotlight, he was outgoing and friends with everybody. He was the copy of Harry, from personality to talent. Charlie loves to sing, write songs, and play his guitar, but sometimes he would just go too far at the last thing, like right now.

Y/N makes her way downstairs, watching her son giving a real rock concert, she smiles at herself, he was so much like Harry…

“Hey little Rockstar, can you keep down, please?”

“But mom, a rock show without a loud guitar’s solo is not a rock show” The boy whines.

“Good thing we are at home, and not at a Rockshow, right?”

“I guess…” Charlie says “Mom when dad will be home? I want to show him my new guitar’s moves.”

“You and your sister just want to know about your father, huh?” She says pulling her hand to her chest, pretending to be hurt. “I am pretty cool too, just so you know”

Charlie laughs and gives his mom a hug.

“Mom, you are pretty cool, but dad is cooler”

“Such a kind boy I raised” She laughs, kissing him on the head.

She makes her way back to the kitchen, to finish the dinner, when she gets there, she notices Maya wasn’t in the living room anymore, assuming she went to her room, Y/N keeps doing her business.

Around 7 pm, Y/N heard the door open, and Harry shows up by the kitchen.

“Hi darling, how was your day,” Harry says kissing his wife.

“Really good, me and the kids just chilled all day long, what about yours?”

“It was really productive, just find a different way to do the melody of track 6 of the album, I can’t wait to show it to Charlie, he will love it so much!”

Y/N wasn’t surprised by his declaration, Charlie and Harry always had this special bond between them, Charlie’s love for music just made it all stronger. Sometimes she worried about Maya getting jealous of their relationship, but she never showed any type of different behavior. But Y/N would be lying if she said she didn’t wish Harry and Maya were closer.

As Harry would cross the door of the kitchen, Maya showed up, with the brightest smile on her face. “Hi dad,” she says hugging him, he did the same. “Look the drawing that I made!”

She shows him, but Harry didn’t even take the drawing to look closer, actually, his eyes lays on the picture for a few seconds.

“Hi! it’s cute, honey” He pats her head and goes to the basement, to find Charlie.

Y/N sees the worst sight a mom could see, her daughter’s face falling because of sadness, the little tears starting to pour from Maya’s eyes.

Before Mays can say anything, Y/N is there to hug her.

“Shh baby, mommy is here” She doesn’t hear anything but her sobs.

“Mom, why da-dad always wants to be with Charlie?” She tights her arms around her mother “Dad never want to spend ti-time with me-me, or give me at-attention, I thought that parents didn’t have favorites, but dad ob-obviously does! Mays cries even harder.

“Baby, come on, let’s talk in your room, ok?”

Both goes to Maya’s room, Y/N puts her on her lap, like she used to do when Maya was a toddler.

“Maya, I want you to listen to me, ok?” She grabs her daughter’s chin, she was now looking at her teary green eyes “Your dad loves you so much baby, you are his whole world! When he found out we were having a baby girl he cried for a whole week, you know?”

“He did mom?”

“Yes! You are his little girl”

“I wish I was a little girl forever, maybe then dad would like me as much as he likes Charlie”

The sadness in her voice makes Y/N want to cry “Maya, your dad loves you both the same, the only difference is that your dad can get really worked up about his music, and turns out that Charlie has the same excitement and passion as your dad. Charlie isn’t his favorite or the one he loves the most, he is just the one that shares more common interests.

“I love you mom” She says, “But can I sleep now? I don’t wanna go down there, not right now.”

“Yes baby, but tomorrow you have to eat a lot on breakfast, ok, since you don’t want to have dinner.”

“Ok mom” Y/N gives Maya a kiss on the forehead, and before she lives the room she hears her voice “Mom, I heard you and Charlie earlier, and I think you are the coolest”

Y/N laughs “Thank baby, good dreams”

Her smile leaves her face as soon as she left the room, Y/N has never been more pissed at Harry than she is right now, she goes to find him in the little studio downstairs. As she approaches, she hears both laughing, her heart softens a little.

“Hi guys”

“Hi Mom”

“Hi baby’

Y/N sits on the little puff next to Harry “Hey Charlie, could you let mom and dad talk a little in private? Please?”

Charlie looks at Harry, that looks at you with confusion on his face.

“Ok mom” He hangs the guitar on the wall, but before he left the room, his mother says “If you want to eat dinner you can, it’s ready, just be quiet because your sister is sleeping”

“Alright,” The boy answers, leaving the room completely.

“Why is Maya sleeping already? Is she ok?” Harry askes with worry in his voice.

“No Harry, she is not ok!” You left the puff and stand in front of his sit “she was crying because her father doesn’t give the attention she deserves”

“Wait, what? I made her cry?” He stands in front of her “And what do you mean I don’t give attention to her? I always do” He says, feeling hurt hearing such nonsense.

“No Harry, you don’t, when it comes to your free time you always favorites Charlie over Maya, don’t get me wrong baby, I love the bond you have with him, but it is hurting Maya that you don’t have a special solo time with her.” She looks at her husband, there was concern on his face, he opened his mouth, but closed right away.

“She was so excited to show you her drawing Harry, you had to see the smile on her face, she was counting the seconds for you to come home so she could show you, but you didn’t even look, baby.” She stares at his green eyes, the same as Maya, and sees tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I am such a bad dad” He breaks in front of Y/N, both adults hug each other.

“No Bub, none of that, you are an amazing dad, the best of all” The girl says, feeling her heart crumbling, in one hour she saw 2 of the 3 most important people in her life crying.

“Good dads don’t make their daughters cry, Y/N” Both of you sit on the floor, you are still hugging him, “And I didn’t notice I was favoriting Charlie over Maya when it comes to attention, you know?” He looks at you, his face washed with tears and sadness.

You passed the thumb in his face, taking away the tears.

“Is just easy for me to talk to Charlie, he likes the same things as me. I am aware Maya is my kid, but sometimes she intimidates me” He says laughing between is cry “She is so smart and knows so much about art and everything in general, last week we went to the market together, and she started to talk about European Vanguards, and I just couldn’t keep up with the conversation, ‘cus I know nothing about it” He laughs even harder, this time you follows him.

“Damn, I feel like crap,” Harry says, getting serious again “I was just so excited to share the new melody with baby number 2 that I forgot about baby number 1,” He says

“First, they are not babies anymore, are they?” She smiles sweetly at him “Second, parents are still people, baby, they make mistakes. Remember the time Charlie broke his feet playing in the tree?“ Harry nods his head yes “Remember how I go extremely protect over him because I didn’t want him to be hurt again? You showed me I was wrong about it, and we talked, and I cried, I felt like the worst mom in the world, but then you told me it was alright”

“So, now I am the one telling you it’s alright” She pecks him on the lips.

“Thanks, wifey, I love you” Both of them get up off the floor. “Hey, would mind if tomorrow me and Maya spent the day together? It’s not gonna fix everything, but at least I can apologize to her”

“No baby, not at all, Charlie and I could also use some alone time too.”

“Ok, tomorrow I will be taking her to have breakfast and spend the whole day together”

“Ok, so now let’s go sleep, tomorrow you gonna have a busy day”

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

It was not a surprise Harry found Maya in the kitchen so early in the morning, both are early birdies, what did surprise Harry was the lack of conversation between them, when his little girl did not wish him good morning, he realized how much he screwed up.

As she was about to take her cereal in her bowl he sits by her side.

“Hey baby, I just want to say that I am so sorry about yesterday or on any other occasion I didn’t give you the attention you deserve.” She looks at him for the first time since the incident, unlike Charlie, who looked so much like him, Maya was the perfect mix, her little green eyes and her mouth were exactly like Harry’s, but her hair and nose were all her mom’s.

“Daddy loves you so much Maya, you have no Idea-‘’Before he can continue, Maya hugs him, he felt tears in the corner of his eyes.

“It’s ok dad, mom explained to me last night, you and Charlie have the same passions so it’s easier for you to spend time together.”

“No baby, it’s not ok, I wasn’t being a good dad, I love you, to the moon and back, and I love spending time with you, I am genuinely sorry.”

“I forgive you dad, and I love you too, you are the best dad!”

He kisses her head softly “What about both of us have a day just for us?”

“Really dad?” The girl questions smiling brightly “I would love to! What are we going to do?”

“Well, I was thinking of getting breakfast at the doughnut shop and then we can go to a daddy/daughter art class, what do you think?”

“Only if I can order the doughnut with extra chocolate,” The girl says smiling.

“Whatever my baby wants, now let’s got, go change your clothes and please, bring your drawing for dad, ok? I need to admire the masterpiece my little artist did” He pats her head.

“Ok dad!”

He sees her leaving to her room, the amount of love he has for this daughter is incalculable, and he won’t bear to the reason for her tears again, because she is just too angelic to feel sad, and she looked just like her mother when crying.

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ayo-cowbelly · 4 years ago

Text

when the fire goes out, how do we stay warm? - part 1/?

next part ~ masterlist

welcome to my new series ~ an angst dump of “what if anakin and obi wan’s roles on zygerria were reversed?”

you can blame the New SW Canon discord for this. Their angst-loving asses fueled this fire, and what was supposed to be a snippet spiraled into this.

the yarra root i got from discord- we had a huge discussion about tatooine slave culture, and said yarra root is something tatooine parents will put in their child's tea/drinks, to kill them/"put them to sleep", so the masters won't hurt/kill them (it is seen as an alternative to a brutal, painful death). We also discussed the idea that people on tatooine will take their children (or just themselves) and go out to the sand dunes and "let the Desert decide their fates", so when Anakin mentions being "swallowed", that's what he means. Just to clarify.

Hope you like it!

@youngcreativenerdgoddess @alabasterswriting @ilonga @rynae-reblogs @everything-or-anything @waterrose3 (i love y’all, thanks for the support!)

***

Obi-Wan looks down into the arena from his place beside the Zygerrian queen. He wants nothing more than to jump down there, to yell, to scream, to do something- but he knows he can't. To blow their cover now is to destroy any chance of saving the colonists. But he wishes he could save more than just them. He wishes he could liberate this whole damn planet. He wishes he could get rid of the threat the Zygerrians posed, somehow- even if he had to rip the crown out of the slaver queen's cold, dead hands.

Obi-Wan looks across the arena as the queen speaks, not looking at Ahsoka nearby (in that horrible outfit, that made people leer at his grandpadawan, like she was a mere object. They looked at her the way Obi-Wan had seen people looking at Anakin during his brief time on Tatooine all those years ago).

Oh. Anakin. Where was he?

Obi-Wan was furious that the Council had sent Anakin, of all people, to this slaver planet. The should have remembered Anakin's past, his time as a slave when he was just a child. They should have remembered that Anakin was once considered nothing more than property, an object to be passed around to different Masters. Obi-Wan should have remembered, he should have fought harder.

He hopes Anakin doesn't know of this auction, as Obi-Wan knows that Anakin would tear down this entire planet if he found out. He would scrape tooth and nail to destroy this disgusting empire. For Anakin mostly acted on his emotions, not that it was necessarily a bad thing- but he sometimes forgot to look at the big picture. There was a balance there, one Anakin struggled to find.

Balance always seemed to elude him.

Obi-Wan worried greatly. After this dreadful mission, they'd actually talk, for once. About everything.

He focuses back on the queen's words, as she announces the Togrutan governor. Obi-Wan tries and fails to look away from the man's beaten form.

And then the worst happens.

"My friends, behold! Anakin Skywalker, the Hero With No Fear- on his knees before us!"

Obi-Wan barely registers Ahsoka's horrified gasp, for he is equally as distraught. Below him, on the sandy platform, is Anakin. A shock collar is on his neck and dirt on his face. His clothes are ripped, and his hair is mussed and greasy. Obi-Wan wants so badly to run to his brother before Anakin does something rash and gets them all caught.

But when Obi-Wan looks over Anakin's frail form again, he sees something. Something so much worse.

The fire in Anakin's eyes is... gone. There is no defiance, no opposition, none of that trademark confidence- only the hollow gaze of someone who is dreaming of being anywhere else. All at once, Obi-Wan's previous fears vanish. Before, he had been worried that Anakin would say something sarcastic, signal for his 'saber, fight back; but now, Obi-Wan knows that isn't the problem.

Anakin had been a slave, once. Before he was a General, a hero, a Jedi, a Master, a brother, or a husband (yes, Obi-Wan knew. Anakin had never been subtle, and try as she might, neither was Padmé)- before any of that, he was simply Ani. A slave, a son, a child of a cruel Desert that took more than it gave.

This is who is before them now. It wasn't Anakin down there, it was Ani, and that was so much worse. Obi-Wan Kenobi's (previously unknown, for he had never imagined it to be possible) greatest fear had come true, before his very eyes.

For the first time in over ten years, Anakin Skywalker was not fighting back.

"This Jedi, this watchdog of a petty, corrupt senate, a preacher of freedom and peace though he brings only war and death- is nothing more than a puppet! And now, he will kneel before us," The queen boasts, proudly smiling at the cheering crowd.

At this moment, Obi-Wan wants her life to end. He wants it to be at his own hands. How dare she do this, how dare she make Anakin go through such a thing, how dare she-

Oh. She's speaking to him now. "Show him his true place," She commands. Obi-Wan nods numbly, a pathetic movement of a broken man. Obi-Wan feels broken, he does. He feels crushed, splintered, shattered into a million tiny pieces-

Anakin had broken, and as Obi-Wan is his brother, he will too. Two halves of the same whole, and if one goes down the other surely will as well. They are nothing without the other, and are only something when together.

Some may ask, "What is the galaxy without Obi-Wan Kenobi?"

The real question is, "What is the galaxy when Anakin Skywalker stops fighting?"

Obi-Wan doesn't know the answer to that. He doesn't know what it's like to witness your dearest friend, your son, your brother, your soul, fractured into pieces-

Or maybe he does, now. He doesn't want to think about it.

He remembers things Anakin once said, about his mother and Yarra Root and a saying.

"I would rather my child die than be a slave like me."

But Anakin, Ani (for as much as they are different, they are also the same) had once been a slave. And now, he is again. Or maybe he always had been, and only his title had changed with time.

Has Anakin ever truly been free?

How could Obi-Wan have let this happen?

He approaches his former apprentice (though everyone knows that statement is a half-truth; no Master-Padawan pair had ever stayed so close as they had after Knighthood) and he almost wants to claw his eyes out. Anakin is kneeling on the hard ground, his shoulders are hunched. Obi-Wan has never seen him look so... defeated.

As Obi-Wan nears him, Anakin turns. His eyes are glassy, his cheeks are gaunt, and above all he looks haunted. "Obi?" He says weakly.

Obi-Wan doesn't care about their cover anymore. "Yes, dear one, I'm here."

Anakin shudders, his voice cracking from disuse and the delusions of fear. "I- I wanted to help, I was going to- the Root, Obi, the Root- I'll find it, so they can rest- let them rest, let me rest, please-"

"It's going to be alright, I promise. Just hang on," Obi-Wan whispers, and his younger brother makes an aborted movement, one he guesses was meant to be a nod. Obi-Wan looks up at R2, not able to take anymore of this con.

His and Anakin's lightsabers soar gracefully through the air, and Obi-Wan catches them both. Ignoring the angered roar of the spectators, he pulls with the Force and removes the shock collar, trying not to look too closely at the angry red mark it left on Anakin's neck. When Obi-Wan goes to hand Anakin his lightsaber, his brother flinches, but makes no move to take it. "I don't- I don't want it- I want to rest- I want to rest, like Mom- let the Desert swallow me, Obi, please-"

"Anakin, please just hold on, for me. Sleep, and I will be here when you wake up." Obi-Wan blocks the Zygerrian guards' shots as Anakin closes his eyes, slowly crumpling into a fetal position on the ground. The Jedi Master glances up to the balcony, where Ahsoka is holding the queen, green blade pressed close to her neck.

Obi-Wan grips the two lightsabers (lighsabers that would forever be entwined, just as their souls were. Though Anakin loved Padmé more than anything, with his mother a close second, Obi-Wan was somehow more. He was his other half, and they would be brothers until the end). Blades ignited, he scowls up at the slaver queen. "Your Majesty, I feel it is time for your reign to end."

"Oh?" The queen has the gall to laugh, even with a blade to her throat. "Is this what the Jedi are now, wild beasts that fight wars and threaten royalty?" She's not sending her guards to detain him, not yet. She's waiting for him to move, to break, to fight (fight when Anakin cannot).

Obi-Wan doesn't reply. Instead, he jumps.

He goes for the nearby guards first. Their heads roll onto the ground, cleanly severed. One by one, they fall at the enraged hand of a Jedi- no, this is not the fighting of a Jedi, this is the fighting of a brother, an other half, someone who is seeing red because their sibling has been torn apart. Obi-Wan had felt anger before, but never like this. This is cold, and detached, but it is also hot and painful and so horribly real-

And Obi-Wan is drinking it up, letting it fuel him as he practically flies through the arena.

Rex is taking out the Zygerrian reinforcements, his aim always ringing true. Ahsoka, who now seems to be nearing the Dark path Obi-Wan has started down, has killed the prime minister and is slowly backing away with the queen. Obi-Wan jumps up to them, signing at Rex to meet them outside.

"Get Anakin" He signs to the Captain, who nods once and as gently as possible lifts his General (the clones are much stronger than they look, Obi-Wan has learned) and exits. The Jedi turns to the enslaving, despicable ruler. She smiles cruelly, blood from where she must've bit her tongue starting to coat her teeth. She looks almost primal, exuberant, her eyes flashing with excitement-

She knows Obi-Wan is in pain, and she is reveling in it.

"Kenobi, is it? I must say, I've never seen a Jedi so unhinged. You've surprised me."

"I do like to keep my opponents on their toes," He says roughly, trying to keep his voice steady.

"You and I are similar in that fact." She smirks, making Obi-Wan's blood boil. How dare she compare herself to him (him, who had let Anakin be taken, let him be dragged off to Force knows where, to then be thrown in chains-)

Who was he to act so above this slaver? Yes, she had been the one to do this Anakin, but Obi-Wan hadn't helped at all (never mind the fact that he hadn’t known); and doesn't that make him just as guilty? He had been too preoccupied in the mission, the part he had to play.

That always seemed to happen to them. Obi-Wan was always busy with duties, while Anakin spiraled. Obi-Wan never noticed, never helped. His eyes flutter closed, just for a second, and he is met with the image of his sleeping brother, cheeks sunken and face pale. The guilt eats at him, painfully carving out a place in his heart.

The world fades. Obi-Wan lunges. There is a scream.

However, the scream doesn't come from the queen. It comes from Ahsoka.

"Master, no! It's not- you can't-"

"Ahsoka," Obi-Wan whispers, one blade mere breaths from slicing through the queen. "Anakin-"

"-Wouldn't want you to do this," She interjects. They are both aware of the unspoken truth that hangs in the air; Anakin would do it himself, before either of them could even move. "Master, please, she'll be taken back to Coruscant, but we can't do this." She gestures to his ignited lightsabers.

Obi-Wan looks to his weapons, then to Ahsoka, and back again. The blinding anger slowly melts away, leaving an icy-cold feeling in his bones.

The queen glowers. "Master Kenobi, I grow tired of this. Perhaps we can work up an agreement?"

"I will not barter with slavers, you witch," he snaps. He tries to shrug off Ahsoka's wince, knowing she was surprised at his tone. She had never heard her grandmaster so... outraged. Impatient, tired, disappointed, sure- but not this.

This is almost Dark.

The Zygerrian queen chuckles. "How about this: If you agree to my terms, I will let your friends go, no questions asked."

As much as he doesn't want to listen, Obi-Wan is enthralled by the promise of Anakin's safety. "What do you require?"

"Master, you can't-" Obi-Wan shakes his head, and Ahsoka, upset as she is, quiets.

The conversation resumes. "It seems I'm in need of an attendant, if the girl behind me is a fake. Would you be willing to take up the role?" Her tone and word choice are misleading. There is no option, no room to decline- if he tries, she will have them all killed. She is in control of the situation (Obi-Wan certainly isn't, he lost control when Anakin came out in a shock collar- don't think of it- don't- stop- no- ANAKIN-)

"You will let them go?" Obi-Wan asks quietly.

"They will be free," The queen answers, the irony of her words likely not lost on her. How rare it must be for her to let a person go, let alone three and a droid.

The lightsabers hiss as they turn off. Ahsoka looks horrified, and Obi-Wan's stomach churns at his decision. 'But Anakin will be safe,' He thinks to himself.

The queen grins. She has won.

***

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