#I don't understand why it can't be mutual

[luvinqstvrnz]

A/N: I've read a lot of other fics, but I wanted to write my own; Keep in mind this is my first time posting/writing a fic to be posted publicly (lmk if there's anything I can do to improve)

Summary:

You've been with Chris for a year or two now, but you never knew exactly what he did and how he made his money, curious you decide to follow him after he leaves your apartment...

Content warnings (MDNI): Fluff, use of pet names, use of y/n, drugs, etc.

dealer!Chris x f!Reader

You and Chris have been together for about a year and a half, he's always been so secretive about what he does when he leaves after you guys have been together for a few hours (or days), you knew he had 2 triplet brother's that he lived with and everything they did on the regular.

Chris never told anyone publicly about your relationship afraid of how the internet and how they would react, he didn't want you getting death threats or anything crazy so you both mutually decided not to be public about your relationship on the internet.

You knew about Chris's job as a YouTuber but what could he possibly be doing at 12am for hours before he talks to you again? One night you decide to follow him when he leaves your apartment, trying to be very sneaky about your every move. Eventually all of his driving around lead you to a warehouse. You knew about the warehouse him and his brother's had but this was not it. You carefully stepped out of your car making sure you didn't alert anyone in the area around you. You watched quietly as Chris walked up into the warehouse and quickly followed behind him, making sure no one saw you.

As you tip toed past the other people in the warehouse the overpowering stench of weed hit your nostrils.

“Jesus Christ...”

You say softly under your breath; You've never been around this much in your life, what in the world was this place? Suddenly you see Chris emerge from behind some door.

“What the fuck do you mean we don't have enough to fulfill this order? I specifically told you-”

You hear him raising his voice to another guy in the warehouse, you've never seen Chris yell at anyone besides his brother's. You felt a bit turned on by him, the way he put other people in there place. You've never seen this side of Chris before...

Suddenly a hand reaches from behind you and grabs your shoulder, making it so you can't move.

“Yo Chris! Who's this chick? Do you know her?”

You've never heard this voice before, you had no idea who this was. Chris immediately looks over and sees you standing there, all you can do is stare at him. You're frozen, it's like someone paused you, you had no idea what to do.

“Y/n? What the- How the fuck... How did you get here?”

Chris says to you in a calm but stern voice, nobody knew of this place but him and the people who worked for him.

“I-I.. I-”

Your words were frozen, you couldn't mutter a word.

“Let her go. I'll take it from here...”

You hear him command the man behind you and he grabs your hand and leads you out of the warehouse.

“How did you get here? Are you hurt?”

He asks you lovingly. You just shake your head, you've never seen this side of Chris. Where did all of this come from? How did he keep this a secret from everyone for so long?

“You could've gotten seriously hurt... Why the fuck did you even think to follow me?”

He sounded stern and aggravated, he still sounded caring though, it was like he was mad but relieved you were okay.

“I-.. I really just wanted to know where you keep going when we part... I didn't ever think it would be... This?!”

You tried your best to keep your composure, you didn't want Chris getting upset at you, or anyone for that matter.

“Look, I'm sorry I never told you ma... It's just no one could or can ever know about this, not even Nick or Matt know.”

He paused and looked at you, trying to find understanding in your eyes.

“I can see why you don't want anyone to know... I'm sorry...”

He looked at you softly and leaned in to kiss you. He kissed you softly and bit your lip lightly as he pulled away.

“Do you want a ride home ma?”

You thought about it for a while and finally accepted, you didn't know what would happen if you went home with him right now but you knew he wouldn't do anything you wouldn't want him to.

He drives you to your appartment and let's you out of the car. He walks you up to your door and stops you before you go inside.

“I didn't know if you'd exactly want me to come in with you but uh... If it's okay with you... I'd like to.”

Chris doesn't normally ask to stay, he usually just stays without question. This worried you a bit.

“Of course you can stay... Why wouldn't you be able to?”

A wave of relief washes over him as he steps inside right after you, he leisurely walks over to your couch and crashes down on it, causing it to bounce with him.

“I'll be over there in a second, let me change real quick my clothes reek...”

You finished changing and walked into your living room, Chris was spread out on your couch watching his phone. You walked over and sat next to him, he placed one of his arms around you and pulled you close to him.

“So...”

He said slowly, trying to start conversation, you could tell he was a bit nervous considering everything you've seen tonight.

“So?”

He looked at you, his eyebrows were a bit furrowed and his eyes were wide.

“You're not... Mad?”

You just stopped and looked at him lovingly. You pressed a soft kiss to his lips and played with his hair.

“No, Chris. I'm not mad.”

He looked at you relieved and kissed you softly. You kissed him back, you started thinking of earlier when he told off one of the other people at the warehouse and your thighs lightly squeezed together. You pressed your lips onto his more passionately and cradled his face in your left hand.

“Y/n?”

He broke the kiss and looked at you but you ignored it and kept kissing him. After a few minutes of making out with him, you guided him to your breast's, your nipples were already hard from thinking about that time in the warehouse and kissing him. You felt him squeeze your breast's and pinch your nipples from above your tank top. Eventually you get on top of him and straddle his lap, slowly rubbing yourself against his length, it didn't take long for him to get hard. You kissed him and dry humped him for a few minutes until you heard his phone ring.

“Fuck!”

He whispered, he looked at you to make sure it was okay if he answered it, you nodded, he composed himself and answered his phone.

“Yeah, I'll be back in a minute.”

He said to someone over the phone and hung up.

“I'm so sorry baby but I have to get back to the warehouse.”

“It's okay Chris, don't worry about it.”

You watched him leave, knowing it wouldn't be the end of this interaction...

[mixelation]

been rotating a minakushi/mikoto concept, help

concept is basically: kushina and minato have an open relationship because he takes Long Missions; kushina starts hooking up with mikoto. kushina and minato would have been 19-20 when itachi is born, so i think mikoto is definitely already married. on the fence about how much fugaku knows about this and his opinion. leaning towards "fugaku is cool with mikoto hooking up with other women, because their marriage is largely political and he doesn't consider kushina a threat to their marriage*"

*for multiple reasons-- kushina can't get mikoto pregnant (important because this is why he married mikoto), kushina's not going to displace him as head of house or head of clan or gain sway within the clan from it (because she's not an uchiha), my understanding is that in japanese culture f/f romance is often seen as a phase/immature and not necessarily "real"

anyway then minato gets nominated for hokage and is back in konoha mostly full time again. instead of breaking up with mikoto, kushina pitches a threesome, and mikoto goes for it without consulting or telling fugaku. itachi is a toddler and she'd thought she'd be going back to active missions but the clan wants her to be a perfect housewife with more babies and she loves her kid but she's BORED and minakushi make her feel good. kushina is kind of envisioning this as a continuation of the "vaguely open marriage" arrangement mikoto has because kushina is not a homewrecker, but minato doesn't give a shit (and is maybe even MORE into it?) so she changes her mind quickly. she and mikoto are "best friends" so no one blinks an eye at mikoto occasionally being over late

threesome doesn't last very long because minato becoming hokage means a lot of power for him but also a lot of loss of privacy. they mutually agree to break it off and mikoto and kushina remain close friends. the timeline is such that sasuke is definitely fugaku's, but also people will question this later (i went back and forth on it, because i don't think minato is the type to abandon a baby thta's biologically his, and mikoto isn't the type to slip up with her contraceptive & i like the idea that ninja contraceptives are really really good)

anyway. flash forward a year and a half-ish and naruto is born. the affair creates a butterfly effect where, idk, there's an uchiha guard or maybe even mikoto herself on kushina's protection squad, and this is enough to tip the obito vs minato battle hard enough in minato's favor that his intervention is better. leaning towards the kyuubi being partially extracted such that there's still an attack on the village itself, but kushina reseals it into her and comes out physically spent but in no danger of dying.

so the namikaze-uzumaki family is all alive, but kushina isn't doing well physically or mentally and minato is both exhausted and stupid busy trying to clean up the mess and they have a one day old baby and no family help. (kakashi is fourteen and jiraiya is off trying to track down the mask man, and yep that's about all they have to lean on.) so mikoto shows up with baby sauske strapped to her back and is like "okay, we're a village and we help each other"

kushina: no, no, i want to be a good mom, i can do this--

mikoto: we're helping each other. you're helping me by sitting with the babies while they nap and i'm helping you by making a list of chores that need to be done by the help your husband, our benign dictator, is going to assign

kushina: but i want to be the one who--

mikoto: i know, i wanted to too. but you need to rest and hiring someone to clean your house because your husband won't your husband can't feels SO good

and mikoto tells fugaku she's basically living at her friend's just while she gets back on her feet (and isn't this SO good for the clan, her helping the hokage's wife with their baby), but then she just. never really leaves

for this AU i'm also toying with the idea of fugaku/the uchiha in general still wanting a coup and mikoto NOT wanting it because she wants to fuck the hokage in this universe, so there's some drama about what happens if the hokage cucks the uchiha clan head??? but also mikoto lets itachi be pushed through the ranks because she wants him to take over as clan head ASAP

[detransdniposting]

They're part of why I made this blog.

They ran one of my friends/former coworker off the site a few weeks ago for refusing to interact with detrans or detrans fetishist blogs after his partner killed herself due to harassment from those groups.

He had a vent blog where he basically said "I wish people like that would get therapy instead of harassing people and threatening to commit hate crimes" and impunkster or whatever flipped shit and sent him his home address and threatened to have every detransitioner she knows send cops to where he was staying.

She accused him of being a therapist that was committing conversion therapy despite him being a trans person who works retail and effectively doxxes him. I messaged her trying to reason with her and she basically just responded with nonsense about having his therapist license taken (again, he works for Adam and Eve), but she was unhinged and just kept saying that he was "stalking her and making alts" every time one of his mutuals or her followers pointed out that she was going overboard.

From my understanding, she's an extremely mentally ill person who admits to having delusions and a loose grasp on reality, she's a detransitioner who attacks transgender people that don't want detrans content around them, she's paranoid that trans people are going to hurt her if they don't support her, and as an intersex person I can't help but notice that she claims that she has an intersex condition because she has an alter with endometriosis, which is not actually an intersex condition, and I'm not sure how an alternate personality can have a physical disability and I'm not sure how that makes the person with the alternate personality actually disabled or intersex.

So yeah. She is extremely transphobic, is probably not actually intersex, and she goes out of her way to attack people who call her out on being transphobic and intersexist to the point where she will chase them off of the site and dox them. She also frequently tells transgender people that they should kill themselves and brings up the transgender suicide rate anytime she's talking to a trans person she doesn't like. She told my friend that she actually supports trans people committing suicide if they are not willing to do transition.

I would definitely recommend that all users in the LGBT community just avoid her at all cost because like I mentioned she is unhinged and admits that she is extremely mentally unwell.

She's just generally a really fucking horrible person who should be avoided at all costs.

yeah, i knew i wasn't making it up or misremembering. this is the person who was back in either late 2023 or early 2024 that was bothering me and is also claiming to be entirely transfem now. don't even talk or engage with impunkster-syndrome if they come crawling back, they're an extremely bad faith run of the mill internet troll and literally the exact type of person i was talking about in that post.

[coffeelovinggayidiot]

Like all of tumblr, aparently: we 💜 love ✡️jews✡️ and we would 👊 punch nazis and we reblog five 5️⃣ different haukkah 🕎 posts a year we are like so progresive 💁✨️

Also all of tumblr, aparently: death to all jews 🚫✡️ if you're a jewish person who lives in IsNotRaEl then you're an evil 👺 bad jew and you deserve to be raped and murdered ☠️☠️ what? You fled to israel because we were murdering you by the millions??? Well you should have all died lol ☠️☠️ happy hanukkah btw 🕎

[fernlessbastard]

hot take moment cwilbur is literally just psychotic as all hell and i think people got way too comfortable villianizing the shit out of a man who was clearly portraying signs of severe mental illness. cwilbur was like im so fucking paranoid and scared and i think everyone is out to get me and hurt me and ive spiralled to the point i cant reach out to the people closest to me because im so afraid and lost in this spiral and im having constant panic attacks and hurting myself because i dong know what to do with myself and the only way out for me is to die. and everybody was like EVIL MAN WHO ENJOYS HURTING OTHERS AND IS ABUSIVE ON PURPOSE AND A VILLAIN AND SHOULD NEVER BE TRUSTED AGAIN. and then he came back and was like im still deeply troubled and afraid but im desperately trying to make up for the wrongs i did in the past and the people i hurt in my own way and communication is really hard for me but i hope people know that im truely sorry and i love them. im going to try my hardest to fix this in the only way i know how and then respectfully remove myself from the situation because i feel thats the kindest thing i can do to the people ive hurt. and people were like ABUSER ABUSER ABUSER EVIL MAN ABUSER. like girl

Yeah no based true real no questions asked

I'd hope I manage to portray Wilbur the way he deserves in my content, cause that man is heavily bpd coded and he just needs therapy and someone who genuinely loves him but also can handle his bullshit (which has exclusively and reliably been Quackity like, canonically)

But yeah no completely agreed. The man has issues and has definitely fucked up a lot but at the end of the day he really does need love and care and patience, but also boundaries (and therapy and meds, obviously)

[sskk-manifesto]

(´･ᴗ･ ` )

[hegrudges]

who could i bully into making me an icon border

[sevicia]

It makes me upset to see people calling AI stupid or just straight up saying "fuck AI" (even though it's in an art context) because it's like... I know and understand that the hate is directed at how it's being used currently and that people maybe just don't care like I do about this but it's upsetting because that's WORK. Not in a monetary sense at all but what everyone knows as AI didn't just sprout from the ground one day, it's decades of dedication and learning and development and collaboration to make a tool with the intention of making life better regardless of any one individual's intentions and it just makes me sad that there's so much panic around it, both from the whole "being replaced" thing that comes from waaay way back and also the very real concerns regarding generative AI. Like I can't just go up to someone and say "hey, isn't this cool?!" and expect them to understand I'm talking about AI as a tool and a product of passion and collaboration over time rather than a quick easy fix for when you want to see yourself as an anime character without having to learn to respect art first. I don't knowww it just makes me so so sad that something so beautiful is viewed in such a negative and strange light because the entire world refuses to slow down for a single second

[turtlemagnum]

when i was younger and hung out around my uncle a lot more than i do now, i remember whenever he referred to things regarding his native heritage, he always just called it "indian". called himself an indian, called the words he taught us indian, so on. since i was a little kid who didn't know any better, i didn't know that "indian" in the context of indigenous americans was a very broad, frankly bastardized term to paint a vast variety of cultures spanning two whole damn continents with one brush. it only occurred to me as i got much older than i was at the time that there'd be more than one "indian" language, and up until now since i had no idea what tribe(s) he even is i couldn't even begin to know where to look unless i found a download of every goddamn interlingual dictionary available and painstakingly checked every godddamn one for what their word for "thunder" is

the word he taught us meant thunder was hiloha. i didn't even know how to spell it until now, because he only ever said it aloud. literally just a few minutes ago, i decided to ask my grandma (his sister) if we knew what tribe(s) he belonged to. and apparently he's a mix of choctaw and makah. which gave me a lead, which led to me finding a dictionary on libgen, which led to me word searching "thunder" in the choctaw to english dictionary. it's the only word i remember him teaching us, and i'm unsure if he ever tried teaching us others. but it was his dogs name, and he was a damn good boy, so i remembered it clear as day. though, they normally shortened it to "hilo".

so, i guess what came out of this is that i now know a bit more about my uncle's heritage, and where to look for more research. so, if you're gonna have a takeaway from this, i'd appreciate it if you remembered the word "hiloha". it means thunder. and aside from being the name of a very good boy who deserves to be remembered, i think it's even more important to remember the histories, cultures, and of course the languages of all the indigenous folks who came before us and did their damndest to preserve their cultures in spite of it all.

[anarchomitsumi]

can't stop thinking about how there's people i met on here when i was 15 and they were 13. and even if we haven't spoken in years they're out there somewhere about to turn 18 this year and i wish them a happy birthday.

[ghcstcd]

You're all traumatized (/joking) by a fantastic fic of Dewdrop that involves a lake, while I'm actively imagining Dewdrop during his time as a water ghoul gracefully wading through water. His hair blossoming around him.

[wastemanjohn]

🤪.🤪

[meownotgood]

Realness from u I'm still reading part 2 just in case of smth happens but CSM part 2 is getting slow for me 😭🙏 still love that series ofc but u know Fujimoto WTF are u cooking

no seriously... I just... haven't really cared much for chainsaw man part 2 in the last couple months... I was really interested at first, but as time has gone on I've just stopped. it's not bad or anything, I just don't really care for it, especially compared to how much I love part 1.

maybe I was expecting too much? fujimoto did say it'd be really different from part 1 after all lolol

[le-velo-pour-dru]

It's so fun and interesting to me how my asexuality makes me find things attractive differently than my allosexual friends :3 🩷 Like I'll see my mutuals freaking out over an aspect of an image or a video that when I focus on them... I just Cannot understand why they're losing their mind over it. Or I'll just find it attractive in a completely different way than they do. People are different and have different perceptions of things!! And I just find it so interesting!! :D 💖

[literallyjustanerd]

sinking slowly into herahsoka hell

it's about the angst

it's about the second chance at love

it's about love in war and putting duty first no matter how much you want each other

it's about two incredibly competent, hot bisexuals

[northwest-by-a-train]

Anyway re: Jeanne d'Arc. It's anachronistic to define her as a fascist saint or as a nationalist warrior. To quote Lucien Febvre, you're giving Diogenes an umbrella and Mars a gatling gun. I don't think people in tumblr making comics about Joan of Arc as she relates to gender, violence, or her relationship to god are the reason we have the far-right turn her into a fascist icon. I don't think Leslie Feinberg writing about her emboldens Eric Zemmour. I don't think F'murr's Jehanne au pied du mur (an excellent comic book where Joan is either piss-drunk or trying to have sex with her alien husband or trying to rope Attila the Hun into many a harebrained scheme) had any impact on racism in France.

I think we can say it's sometimes cringey & annoying when people use complex & flawed historical people as blorbos (cf: Hamilton, Our Flag Means Death, The Terror). Sometimes it's done very skillfully and it sheds light on history and sometimes it's in poor taste and obscures the events and one's mileage will enormously vary over time (used to be big into Hamilton, find it a poor history lesson and a cringe fandom now, but I don't think it has had any negative consequence on antiblack racism in the U.S)

But people on Tumblr or even writers have very little impact on tradcath fascist radicalisation, and if they do, I don't think they're worsening the situation in any way shape or form. The people in Orleans aren't reactionary racists because Joan of Arc is an inherently Racist or Royalist or Christian figure. They're racists because they're pieces of shit and right-wing tradcath reaction has been a big thing in the french countryside for structural reasons. I can understand getting mad at "Marie-Antoinette did nothing wrong" Coppola-snorting coquettes (M-A was ridiculously and blithely evil irl) but I find it really strange to have Joan of Arc being a tumblr blorbo for us queers a hill one would be willing to fight on.