#I don’t care if we’re annoying
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@accidentalslayer my beautiful queen
a tiny sphinx
#I don’t care if we’re annoying#i love her so much#and this sphinx is fucking cool#vveirdvvitch is still on muscle relaxers#honey bunny pumpkin pie
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Season 3 continues to sound more and more unappealing
#lmao not to be a hater on main but like#the dickriding is annoying (and it always was)#frankly unless we’re talking about enkil getting up i really don’t care lol#interview with the vampire#iwtv#i’m really gonna have to find a new show aren’t i? fuck….
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Man, I still remember participating in one of the many jjba zines that I took part in and how my piece was placed as the first page (for the second time) and how one of my mutuals/artists that I’ve always admired, hit me with the “oh… you’re on the front page again… 😅…” like man, that kind of killed me lmfao. I never got over it like man, what was that about.
#it’s not like i put the books together myself or anything all my ass did was submit my work#like this was from a really popular and well known artist as well like#their art has always been so gorgeous to me too I was like ‘I’m literally a nobody is this person really being shady or…’#rambling#I guess it’s nice being in a zine with ppl I don’t know or care to get to know at least now 😭… just submitting my art and running#referring to the jjk zine 😭 I need t start working on it uhh#zines make me feel so anxious man#it really did make me feel bad and almost guilty? I was like this is kind of awkward…#another zine I was in which was run by a mutual… well… I never even got my zine in the mail#and I even sent them $20 for some merch that they were making since I wanted to support and never got that either…#they deleted their blog but I see that they remade and draw a lot of DM and have a lot of popular posts here so it’s kind of awkward seeing#their art shared on the dash sometimes skeks#we’re still mutuals on Twitter but I don’t rly want to ask about my zine again or the $20 bucks#it’s okay like I owe other ppl stuff too I’m a late bird man but still loskekk#they were the mod for the zine too#I might hit them up again I guess I still love their art and they were always fun to talk to#there was another zine that I participated in where we had to purchase our own copy bro#i remember being so annoyed by that but went ahead and bought it anyway#I was invited to this zine so it made me even more annoyed#I#Guess it didn’t make its money back#or something like that but I remember being broke at the time and was pissed that I had to pay for my own book#I didn’t buy any of the merch because why when it was supposed to be free#if you’re participating in a zine the book and merch should be free
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.
that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.
weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.
#most of it is stuff i can’t help like!!!#coworkers and i don’t share a lot of interests so i’m always like. yes i’ve heard of that show but haven’t seen it. no idk that band sorry#and they’ll like. talk shit abt other people who share my interests without realizing that i also like those things#so i just have to sit there and take it#i feel like i don’t have a lot in common with my friends even. a few shared interests but very different lives#in my experience the conscious choice has been to try to keep up with what’s popular but it’s just. not interesting to me#i got bored and forgot to finish s2 of stranger things and never picked it back up#even alt subcultures have gone kinda mainstream and i never quite slot in#let’s not even touch the gay culture ‘flags’ that are extremely online and unrelatablr#and the most frustrating thing. every time i try to talk about myself and my interests i feel people shutting down#one person i know. open mouth sighs in exasperation when i open my mouth#i don’t know why you’re making it my problem that we’re different#i know there is supposed to be a niche out there for everyone but some of that feels like#those niches are falling prey to marketability. if you’re too far out of the mainstream. too out of touch. it can’t be helped#a lot of messaging online is like. embrace weirdness but only if it’s subversive in a very specific way#too normal to hang out with self-proclaimed proud weirdos. too weird to hang out with normies#like i thought the thing was to disavow performativity. i’m sorry i don’t find the same things interesting#i don’t care about the office and you don’t care about the hundred years’ war. that’s fine. why is that seen as a personal fault of mine#i feel like some of the reaction i get might be bc it comes across as hipster shit. idk#i’m literally just oblivious and looking for any kind of indicator for social interaction#but so often it feels like the onus of finding common ground is on me. i have to listen abt things idk but no one cares what i have to say#i think what makes it more frustrating is this reaction from people who claim to not care. do their own thing#and then get annoyed when i do mine and it’s. different#instead of being like ‘fuck the mainstream! conformity is bullshit! be yourself!’ it’s like#‘fuck the mainstream because it doesn’t appeal to me personally and i’ve made my own club!’#and this is not going to come out right because i’m just at my limit and venting and don’t know how to say things the right way#so people don’t misunderstand me#i just happen to never like the Right Things and know the Right Things and act the Right Way and idk how else to say it other than#can we be more normal about weird people#idk it’s hard to talk abt this without sounding like i’m just complaining but i’m more bewildered and trying to state things as i see them
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I refuse to engage with any of this “Sephora kids” discourse beyond asking WHY ARE YOU FILMING CHILDREN YOU DONT KNOW AND POSTING IT TO THE INTERNET??
That is weirdo behavior!!! Not to mention putting these kids privacy at risk!!
Get a fucking journal, call your friend to complain about it.
Btw, the Venn diagram of people filming the Sephora kids and the people who constantly complain about “gen z filming strangers” is a circle
#I hate this whole thing so much#I don’t care if they were rude#I don’t care if they were being annoying#who cares!!!!#we’re reaching new highs with policing individual behavior through public shaming#sephora kids
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I'm taking all my boops back. Can't believe you didn't follow me...
dude I went to boop you and clicked unfollow hahaha. Then quickly followed you again but now I think I should have left you unfollowed just to fuck with you >:)
:D
#HAHAHAHAHAHAA I’m so MEAN#you deserve it#and your excessive boops#But nah we were only not mutual for like 3 sec#But honestly I don’t follow some people I consider mutuals#But they post too much stuff I don’t care about so I don’t follow them#BUT WE ARE STILL MUTUALS#Anyway now I’ve decided to randomly unfollow you and see how long it takes you to notice#Mwahaha#chaotic evil? I think so#Punkjet#Ask#boop ask#<- so people can block because fuck we’re annoying haha
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Crying a little bit in the bathroom. Because I made it. My friends and I are bung obnoxious in the library. There’s far too many of us at one table. We’re giggling uncontrollably. I can’t believe things turned out okay.
#shitpost#college#I love these people so much it hurts#we’re debating how hard it would be to fight five duck-sized horses#and I know that we’re the most annoying people here#but I really don’t care#because part of this whole college thing is being loved
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i should probably stop trying so hard to have a best friend, and face facts; that my baby brother is already my best friend
#‘baby brother’ i say of a 6’2 man imaoooo#but he’s the baby of the family either way#idk how lame it is to have a sibling as your best friend but i don’t care <3#bc i have little to no relationship with my sisters and my brother has always had a presence in my life even when i’ve hated him at times#i don’t remember the two years i was alive without him and i pretend they do not exist x#it’s his birthday today but he won’t see this lol#i should tell him i love him more#but i know he’d make a face if i said that#bc we always cringe when shit gets real#our affection is to flip each other off#even when he jokingly kisses my cheek not even lips touching skin i’m like the brother ugh meme#but quite literal imaoooo#he’s a fuckin lil bitch but he makes me laugh til i cry and he’s the one i have the most fun with#and when i get lonely i don’t even mind him being annoying bc i appreciate the company#so maybe i should stop being mean when he says we’re best friends bc we kinda are#i’ll probably make this sappy ass post but then tomorrow he’ll annoy the shit out of me#but that’s just siblings <3#gwen rambles#gwenposting
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i just want to fucking leave man
#my dad thinks is appropriate to throw my entire bed out into the hallway because i annoyed him#by not paying full attention to him when i was in the middle of playing a battlefield match while he was going on another rant#started talking about how we’re being “forced to renounce our faith” because of immigrants like how about you shut the fuck up#but if i try to argue back all of a sudden i’m rude and have an attitude like oh okay#he literally only cares about my brother#was ranting and raving at me for not staying by his side as a medic telling me to get my act together#it’s a fucking game??? hello???#this is like the second week in a row he’s done this to me#last week i can’t even remember what i did but he ended up with my xbox nearly broke because he shoved it and my bed into a wardrobe#my bed isn’t even a fucking bed i sleep on the floor on a duvet and god forbid i ask for another pillow#then when i was trying to sort my bed out he started shouting at me for being too loud like you’re the one raising your voice here?#then told me he was sick of my shit actually i’m sick of yours#woe beside me if i even dare ask him to turn his fucking videos down when i’m trying to sleep#i keep telling my mum i don’t want to visit him and i end up still getting forced to go#zad talks
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okay so labour won big why am I actually fucking terrified seeing the reform numbers
#well!! we’re going even further right i fucking guess#these are two leave voting labour seats but still that’s kinda terrifying#the tories yes were right but they weren’t all super far right and they had to at least kinda pretend to care about things#if they DO get these 13 seats that’s gonna change so much and probably push the tories even further right anyway because that’s WHY they los#they’re saying it rn! not conservative enough!#with any kind of luck the party implodes within 4 years but I don’t think that’s likely#I kinda didn’t think about how bad this would be#but yeah we have a far right doing really fucking well now and they’re gonna be in second place in a Lot of places#I’m gonna sleep soon I don’t think I can stomach staying up much later tonight#hopefully there’ll be some good news abt the greens or lib dems doing a bit better#praying we get 4 green seats#also man genuinely fuck the House of Lords but it is nice to see someone who’s not insane and just campaigning as the labour guy on bbc#praying he’s right abt reform being mostly protest votes#the reform deputy leader is. one of the most annoying people I have heard though#labour better do what they fucking promised here bc if they don’t we’re all screwed#anyway! maybe this is a sign to move to bristol. or just. move. but we are also late to the far right party party so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#luke.txt#I’m not gonna sleep properly tonight but so be it
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I think one small reason I’ve put off casshern for so long next to the other bigger factors is like I’d worried I become so obnoxious about it-as if I’m not annoying about getter💀-mainly for the fact even if I’m not watching the original I am *still* watching a series that influenced mega man but it makes me so sad in the MM fandom that people will search for games that take inspiration from mega man but never care to look into what *inspired* the series itself.
It’s like most people obviously know it pulled a lot from Astro boy but casshan is barely acknowledged despite the fact it appeared in a crossover Capcom game or just the fact how much stuff it’s OBVIOUS that mm took from it. (A robo dog companion, the villain JUST being sigma, etc) And don’t even get me on about Kikaider cause i literally didn’t know that existed until last year yet it’s painfully obvious that’s where inspiration for the Mavericks being animal like came from and arguably a character who is JUST proto man but if he stayed evil. (Saburo)
It’s really fucking cool how much old anime MM took its roots from and this ain’t even accounting for how the other series definitely pulled from other stuff-someone told me legends ripped from a different anime setting which would track but I have zero clue what that would be-since even if MM was strictly a video game series the people making it clearly cared about all the sentient robot anime they could find, but most MM fans aren’t gonna bother to look into it.
Why? Cause even if a handful of fans are into old stuff generally-I’ve seen MM fans who like mecha as a whole lol-there’s also just too many fans who don’t give a shit about older anime even when the inspiration for their favorite thing is clearly there.
#meg text#I hope I don’t come off too bitchy because like I don’t even like interacting with the fans anyways LOL#but god even if I’m glad I do at least know people who either know this or will listen to me yap it still sucks a bit#I do also feel a little hypocritical given like I got annoyed when people did this with something else (not saying in tags lol)#but I feel the difference is these fans are always whiny about no content and I feel watching it influences fills the void#sure some of the series are arguably fucking deader but afaik most of them at least actually end conclusive LMAO#but also I wouldn’t be surprised if the factor here is just “I only care about the gameplay” which understandable#even if- it also annoys me how people brush off the story themes even if they aren’t executed the best#because again knowing what they PULLED from makes you appreciate it more but also you get to see it better executed by watching shows#oh and just also we’re fucking never getting a anime for a single one of the platformers despite how desperately any of them need it#so watching other robot animes that tackle these themes is literally the closest thing your ever gonna get
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Just read a post about how you shouldn’t trust a doctor who rushes you and like, yes I fully understand the frustration, so here’s what you can do to stop yourself being rushed:
-ask for a double appointment
-ask for a triple appointment
-fuck it ask for an hour long appointment if you think it’ll help
-be outright about what you want/need from an appointment. If you need more time to process information, say that. If you need the doctor to write out all information, say that. If you have a complex case/long history, say that!
-list all the reasons why you want to see the doctor/vet that day and please don’t sugar coat it. “Been vomiting” is a ten minute fix. “Been vomiting after every meal for the past two years” is not. It needs a double appointment and possibly a referral too.
Doctors and vets are overworked to fuck and exploited to hell. Help us out a little, please
#I get the frustration I really really fucking do#But I cannot stress this enough: we do not get overtime#We don’t! If you are booked in for a fifteen minute time slot and it takes 45 minutes we run late. We lose our lunch or we go home late and#We never get that time back. We already work long hours for frankly less pay than you’d expect for someone saving lives#If I run even just fifteen minutes late after one appointment it knocks on to everything and suddenly I cannot HALT#which is the acronym to encourage medical professionals to take care of themselves to reduce human error#(Basically take a break if you’re Hungry Angry Lonely/Late or Tired)#I have known other new grads who have to stay back at work unpaid for 1-2 hours every DAY#Do you know how much that wears you out?#All I’m saying is properly booked appointments are a godsend.#Also don’t sugar coat the reason for bringing a pet into the vets.#‘I want him checked over he’s old’ and ‘I want him euthanised he’s really struggling’ are two VERY different consults#I do get people’s frustrations with doctors but this website has a tendency to forget that they’re still human#If you were forced to do unpaid labour every day because you’ve got an understaffed over exploited work force you’d probably be annoyed too#And I know a lot of people are!!! But people don’t realise medical professionals are too!!!#We’re all in the hell of late stage capitalism together and that means you pay too much for a vet/doctor who does not have#The time or resources they fucking need
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and how does it feel? (only starting your clay project for art class at 12 am knowing full well you have to wake up early in the morning later for that!! class!!)
#i just got my period too help#but anyways!!#i’m working on taking a break from tumblr dot com right now so you’ll probably won’t see me rbing shit here as often#(though no promises i might come here just to annoy and haunt you all again)#but yeahh#it’s…… a work in progress#oh also. one more thing.#the lovestruck is lovestrucking guys i don’t know what to tell you ://///#i’ve disappointed myself it’s getting obnoxious and no one even knows about it#but whatever sheesh i totally don’t care!!!!#we’re going to rewatch a movie while doing this project btw!!#or continue a show!!! we’ll see#nadirants
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i don’t have a single device for which the charger works perfectly and not to sound like a boomer but i feel like that is. pretty indicative of Where We’re At Technologically
#mine#phone needs a Specific Angle and it’s not a cord problem bc it does this with literally 4 different cords#ereader is on such a lag that it takes 6 minutes to realize it’s actually been plugged in#laptop is just. fucked up#it’s become a hassle to use literally anything#and yet. this is what we’re supposed to prefer#the thing that drives me crazy is that we’re all supposed to use these different devices for everything#and no one cares about the quality#my laptop charger died last week. it feels impossible to find a replacement#i found a refurbished one and it doesn’t actually work#guess im going to have to spend $50 to buy the Officially Licensed Replacement Cord#and with my ereader. i literally don’t know what the problem is#i barely use it#i think it’s just Because i barely use it so it wastes the battery on the screensaver bc it’s like. impossible to completely turn it off#so when i don’t touch it for 4 months it’s actually super duper dead when i plug it in#which is. i’m gonna be honest. equally annoying#my switch is the only thing that actually works and even that’s on its second cord in three years#it’s just. planned obsolescence is EVERYWHERE#all of these devices still feel brand new to me. and yet
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it feels mean when u realise tht certain ppl just aren’t adding anything positive to ur life, n tht they just make u feel anxious, on edge, confused and under appreciated… but i feel like im starting to listen to my gut to whose presence makes me feel safe, heard, loved and appreciated
#i don’t rlly wanna be friends w ppl who make me feel needy and annoying and unloved#not saying tht i should rely on others to make me feel happy or whatever#but there are ppl in my life where i don’t feel this uncertainty and discomfort#one of the friends deeply hurt my feelings and I cut them out for a while and then we became ‘friends’ again#bc i did miss having them in my life and it was v intense#but i also feel like im not rlly interested in being close w them anymore#like tht hurt never went away#n now i don’t rlly feel like i rlly care abt them tbh#despite the fact we’re supposed to be friends#i think i lost respect and compassion for them lol i don’t view them the same way as i used to#and the other friend were not close to begin w they’re friends w the friend i fell out w#but they make me feel anxious and don’t seem interested in acc being friends w me#but message my friend tht i introduced to them a lot so idk#they kinda give fake energy tbh and i don’t rlly feel comfortable being around them#which is fine bc we don’t hang out anyway lmao#but sometimes they’ll pop up on stories ive posted#n i feel like i just gotta fake it#i cba communicating it bc it always leads to conflict#so im probs just gonna let it drift#i do feel like i have a habit of wanting to cut friends out tho#bc i feel 50/50 w ppl a lot#some ppl i feel a safe connection w#others leave me feeling confused and on edge#so i think my gut is tryna tell me tht im just not comfortable#and when i spoke to a therapist ages ago abt this they told me to listen to my gut and be wary of who I’m friends w#but bc i also have abandonment issues etc I never know whether I’m being too sensitive and my trauma is driving the wheel#or whether deep down this is how i feel#it’s hard to trust ur gut when ur traumatised bc it can be rlly wrong#journal
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