#I did not EVEN try to be funny I'm not as funny as the gorilla

[stars-lilacs]

QSMP

I'm so upset that none of my friends are into the qsmp. Like, what do you mean you don't care about gay minecraft roleplay???? How could you not be completely invested in a 36 year old man's fake platonic husband and their two egg children in a minecraft server??

The worst part is they won't even let me mention them. I can't make any damn references to anyone without getting confused glares. Like, sorry you refuse to watch every vod from every creator on the server and don't understand the lore.

It's so cool because of the amount of people on the server, like there are SO many perspectives to see things from and so many different story lines to get invested in. Personally, my favorite storyline was Ph1lzA and the Enderking thing. I've always loved the concept of a character being corrupted or possessed and forcing them to hurt their loved ones(don't question me). Tallulah and Chayanne's admins did SO good. So did Phil, he sounded like a whole different person. And Phil was the best person to do this to. He's practically everyone's dad on the server, so seeing such a caring and fun guy to get aggressive and threaten his own children was scary and a great arc for him to experience.

I also absolutely LOVE the ships. Like you can't TELL me that you don't absolutely love Roier and Cellbit's relationship. Pac and Fit? OH MY GOOOOOD. I love the fanart and fanfics of them 😭 (I ship the characters in the actual server, not the content creators). I love Deathduo. Missa x Ph1lzA forever. They make such a good duo with how they interact around each other and the eggs. Roier and Cellbit have such a cute dynamic, I loved that one time Cellbit was running away and trying to blow himself up, and Roier went, "No, you can't kill yourself! You're too sexy!" They are so silly together, and I just think they're so cute.

Also the fandom is absolutely beautiful. I love all the fanart and memes, the fanfics and animatics. OH MY GODS. I really wish I had the confidence to make fanart or fanfics, I'm too nervous that I'll get info wrong or have a bad headcannon lol. I adore looking at the way people draw the eggs. My favorite designs are when they're bipedal dragons or like they're half hatched and their legs are sticking out of the shell 😭 its so cute!!! I still don't mind when they're just drawn like kids but with dragon features.

I loved Tallulah and her story, including Wilbur. I don't like Wilbur for what he did (even if it might be fake I genuinely don't know anymore) but I like him as a character in the qsmp. I love all the clips of Wilbur and Tallulah. Like when Lullah brought a gorilla into the garden and she was just so happy but Wilbur was absolutely terrified was so funny. The way he basically gentle parented her was adorable, like he didn't know how to raise a kid and just wanted her to be happy. (Wilbur is a horrible person, if the allegations are true, and I don't support him. I just like his character in the story but still understand why some people wouldn't like his character)

The humor is probably the best part. There are so many quotable things. One thing that I specifically remember was when Phil went to wake up one of the eggs (when they were all in hospital beds or smt IDK-) with Pac and someone else, Phil got downed by a warden and Pac went up to him and said, "Philza. I am here." in an overly manly voice, or something like that. Also I love just randomly saying quotes and pretending like everyone understands and thinks I'm cool. "we are all going to die. the sun is a false god but a true threat." -Gegg "IN THIS WORLD THERE ARE 2 GENDERS, PAIN AND SUFFERING" -Dapper "Geez abuelito I didn't know you were into drama omg slay" -Tallulah "heaven is homophobic motherfucker son of a bitch" -Roier

Anyways, I need more QSMP obsessed friends to talk to <3

(part 2 coming soon <3)

[livfastdieyoung69]

I'm back with my requests because I'm feral for cody he's literally so fine anyway maybe something with reader being with cody during the miz TV segment and going a little feral over Dom calling cody a deadbeat ykyk the usual we love feral reader i think it'd be a little funny if cody had to hold reader back because they're going for doms throat

A LOVE SO DEEP IT HARMS

(Cody Rhodes x Y/N)

Wrestling has more than one royal family

As Cody’s theme played and he walked out into the arena, clad in a suit, fans cheered in excitement for the scheduled interview on Miz TV. The second Cody sat in one of the two director chairs, The Miz began to talk, asking him questions, or more so repeating his actions of the past weeks with an incredulous tone. Considering this was Miz TV and everything had to be messy, of course, there was a surprise guest and of course, it was Dominik and Rhea Ripley, two people neither Cody nor his partner, Y/N, seemed to get along with.

Y/N watched from backstage as Cody stood from his chair as they reached the ring, standing up themselves as if they could protect him from the locker rooms. They watched as Cody egged on the fans, barely able to hear anything over the booing crowd, but able to make out Dom daring to call their husband a bad father.

If there was one thing Cody was not, it was a bad father. The little girl adored Cody just as much as he did his own father even at such a young age. Clearly, Dom wasn’t too aware of what happened backstage because Cody and Y/N brought their child with them to every Raw, every pay-per-view, every press event, everything. If they didn’t, there would be no way for them to see their baby while they both maintained their careers. Knowing the amount of effort not only Cody, but also how much effort they put into being able to travel with their child, and hell, even their dogs sometimes, Dom’s comment made them angry. Very angry.

“…a deadbeat dad. Actually, Y/N is here too, so I guess both of you are deadbeats, huh?” The boos of the crowd seemed to get impossibly louder, vibrating against the solid concrete of the building as the rest of the crowded locker room tensely watched Y/N, uncomfortable air quickly spilling into the small space.

“Did he really just say that?” Becky spoke from besides them, eyes wide and voice thick with utter confusement and anger. She received no response, and instead watched as Y/N power walked out of the room and make a quick right- straight to the gorilla.

They marched to the entrance of the arena much to the staff’s complaint, feeling no need to grab a mic, and quickly, their walk turned into a run, the crowd cheering as Y/N dived into the ring, spitfiring their rage down the throat of half the Judgement Day.

“You wanna try that again? Huh? Or do you need your mami to say it for you, you little bitch!” After they pushed Dom around a bit, Rhea stepped infront of him at the mention of her title.

“Oh, look at that, comin’ to rescue your Dom Dom? Maybe you should teach the little crybaby to keep my families name out of his mouth.” Their words held a tone of amusement at first before they inched closer to Rhea, sizing her up with a voice full of fury.

While Y/N and Rhea shoved closer to each other, exchanging many more insults, refs and other staff were quick to make their way to the ring before it could truly get violent. Cody was quick to pull Y/N away from Rhea when they backed up the smallest amount, making Rhea believe they were backing down, but Cody knew they were only making room to deck the woman right across the face.

Y/N fought against his hold, gripping at the triceps held around their waist and trying to push their feet to the floor but Cody only dragged them instead. They refused to give up all the way backstage, yelling over at Rhea and Dom as a few refs, and now the rest of Judgement Day held them back. They finally relaxed into Cody’s hold after they left the gorilla, sending a useless swat to his arm.

Cody scoffed and pinched their hip in return before carefully grabbing their elbows and turning them to face him.

“I think we need to work on your anger problem there, N/N.” Though his voice was stern, the smug look on his face let them know he was only teasing.

“Or maybe people should stop being dumbasses and leave you and my baby out of their drama.” Their aggravation, which was clearly still there, seemed to be spewing out at everyone now.

“Your baby? Hate to break it to you, N/N, but I’m pretty sure shes mine too. Wait, where is she?” Cody brought them back into his embrace, this time facing him, while he spoke, a sigh leaving Y/N as they pushed their ear into his chest.

“Becks got ‘er.” They mumbled into him, wrapping their own arms around him aswell.

“…You just left her in the lockeroom?”

“I made sure Becky had her and then I kinda just started running.” Silence came after their mumbles but was quick to fall away when they both bursted into giggles.

“Oh god, Y/N, maybe we aren’t very good parents.” Cody managed to speak through his quiet laughter, looking down at his lover with much adorance.

unfortanetly my break is over and i gotta go back to car shit on top of work so i prolly wont be able to write as much even tho i already take so long 😭 y did i think going back to school would be a good idea if i literally hated the other 12 years

anyways, i have also discovered a very deep love for aew. like i liked it, but now i loveeee it. and i love mjf (a lot😋)

[zabala0z]

S3 is once again killing me again with all the lore and I love it. School started up so I might be slower with my thoughts but I got episodes 92, 93, 94 and 95 to talk about!!!

MAG 92: Nothing Beside Remains

Elias makes me want to eat my phone, similar to that one guy from MAG 65 :) I was like screaming the whole time. Of course he can see everything, he literally called the police before Daisy came. I took that as "oh he has spies" but no he can see everything, I hate that. Is Jon eventually gonna get that ability or does The Eye give different gifts. Elias hasn't shown any "compellling" sort of power so I assume the latter. ALSO MORDECAI LUKAS?? I need to see a statement from a Lukas member cause what is up with that family, I'm dying.

Guess Basira is now working there. Hope Elias is paying her. the fact he won't tell Jon shit is so funny to me. So The Stranger is now, basically, the confirmed main villain. BBEG yknow? Mildly terrified, I hate circuses and mannequins so this season is gonna like body me

Not much to say on MAG 93 but whatever entity has the whole "gross shit" as its deal, I'm guessing this falls under it. Purple fungus, the obsessive cleaning, etc. Also yaaay Breekon and Hopes!! Again!11!! get out! Poor Georgie. Love her for being like "Do you even have qualifications??". Jons explanation helped me a lot because during Elias's explanations, I'm mostly just muttering curses to myself because I HATE Him. Avatars. Baller. So Jude Perry was the avatar of The Desolation (destruction, fire, etc) Michael Crew was the avatar of The Vast (sky??, emptiness, general loneliness) and then like Jon is an avatar and I'm guessing so is Elias. I think you can have more then one avatar but anyways.

MAG 94: Dead Woman Walking

Jon refereed to the entity as "The End" which, using my notes, was mentioned in Mary keys statement when gertrude asked where the book came from and Mary said "The End" and said she could never serve it, not finding death interesting. Wild that she can't feel fear anymore??? Like damn. This kinda read as someone in a depressive state in some form. Or like a nihilistic person. Cause like "everything ends, time, it has already ended". Wild.

Not much to say on MAG 95 but I did understand the context vaguely which is more then what I can say for the other war statements. Also Martin and Basira friendship??? Love it. She gets really engrossed in books. I dunno if she was like lying or this is something supernatural related but I love Basira

MAG 96: Return to Sender

Literally screeching oh my god. The fact these things just hijacked this mans business is almost funny. They also talked with a circus ringmaster. Nikola Orsinov? gregor Orsinov? A different one. the statement was given 1996 and Gregor was the leader around the 40's but Nikola, by her description I think, sounded young. So. Who was this ringmaster? Maybe Im getting the timeframe wrong. or they're like eternal. Maybe they like just shed skin and steal a new body, just going by the same last name- okay I don't know.

Also, SARAH BALDWIN???? Welcome back girl. The fact the gorilla skin was stolen by gertrude means she was trying to stop The Unknowing, and likely that's why its been this long for it to happen, because they need that skin. Ew. The Stranger loves skin a little too much. Also Sarah being filled with sawdust and cloves. Great. If Not Sasha was shot, would we have seen that? Or is it different with every one of those, NotThem.?

Anyways, I think that's everything. Every statement, I'm kinda thinking, "which entity does this fall under" now that I know the surrounding universe. Tough since I only know 6 by name and I think there's more. 6 too many entities for this world though

[spacecadet-ticklesinspace]

Tiring Out

Summary: Buck's watching Christopher and neither one can sleep.

(Wanted to share one last one ❤️ :) Hope you guys enjoy ❤️ :) And have a great Halloween if you celebrate! ❤️ 🎃)

"You like this show?"

Christopher didn't turn away from the screen. "Bluey's awesome. Even my Dad likes it."

The young firefighter watched the group of animated dogs move across the screen. "Can't really see why."

"It's really funny." Christopher glanced over at his friend. "Also, it really helps me fall asleep."

This time, Buck kept his attention on the TV. "Whatever helps you bud."

The firefighter had agreed to stay with Christopher until Eddie got back from his night shift. However, the kid was supposed to be in bed an hour ago and didn't seem to be tiring out any time soon.

Buck hadn't planned on sleeping anyway. He just hadn't expected to have a buddy with him when he did.

Christopher nudged his friend's arm. "The Dad can be so silly sometimes."

The two watched Bluey's Dad run around screen like a gorilla.

The silliness did pull a chuckle out of Buck.

"See? You're starting to like it too."

"Somewhat."

A moment later, Bluey jumped across the screen with a blanket to tackle her Dad to the ground. She then commented about tiring him out before tickling him through the blanket.

Buck chuckled again and shook his head.

Christopher quickly paused the episode. "I have to go the bathroom."

"Okay."

Christopher took off.

"You don't need to go so fast. Bluey will be here when you get back."

"I just really need to go."

The young firefighter's eyebrows furrowed together.

Once a door shut, Buck stared up at the ceiling. For several seconds, his body screamed at him to get some sleep but his mind just wouldn't get with the program.

The young firefighter pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut. He then heard movement off to his right. "You're back fa---."

Suddenly, a blanket was thrown over Buck before someone jumped into his lap.

Outside of a slight startle, Buck didn't really move from his spot. "What are you doing Christopher?"

"Tiring you out."

Before the young firefighter could ask what he meant, two hands dug into his sides making him jump and cackle in surprise.

Christopher chuckled along. "It actually works."

Meanwhile, Buck was trying to fight his way out of the blanket while also trying to grab the Christopher's hands. "Chrihistopheher!"

In response, the kid spidered upward to tickle his friend's ribs. "Whahat?"

Buck bent forward while still trying to grab Christopher's hands through the blanket, yet the kid managed to slip out of every grab and kept attacking his midsection.

"Yohou hahave a very loud laugh," Christopher teased.

"Christohopheher, Ihi cahant breheathe!"

The kid finally reached up to help pull the blanket off of Buck's head. "Hi Buhuck."

The young firefighter gave him a playful glare.

"I never knew you wehere ticklihish," Christopher replied with an 'innocent' smile

"And Ihi thihink I'm about to figure out yohou ahare too." Buck then started attacking the kid's sides. "With a littlehele pahaybahack!"

Christopher broke into adorable laughter as he tried to squirm out of the hold. After a moment, he managed to wriggle his fingers into Buck's armpit.

The young firefighter squealed and tried to get the little stinker's hand back out.

The two went back and forth for a bit, trying to one up the other.

After a couple minutes, Christopher managed to wriggle through Buck's arms and blew a raspberry into the crook of his neck like his Dad had done with him.

Buck squealed again and turtled. "Okahay, ohokahay! You wihin!"

Christopher leaned back. "Win whahat?"

Buck went limp. "I dohon't knohow, buhut Ihi need aha break."

"Are you okay?" Christopher asked in concern.

"Yeheah, yeah Ihim gohood."

Christopher scooted down and snuggled into the firefighter's chest.

Buck patted his back. "Let's get you to bed so you can sleep."

The kid shook his head. "No. I want to stay out here with you."

"You need to sleep buhud."

"So do you."

"I'll be fine."

"No." Christopher shook his head.

Buck looked down at the mop of hair on his chest. Normally, he would be firmer with getting him to sleep, but he was too exhausted to think of a valid argument. "Alright fine."

"Yes!"

Buck chuckled. "Want to go back to your show?"

"Yes! We have to get to the next episode!"

"Whatever you say bud." Buck settled back on the couch with Christopher still in his lap before hitting play on the show.

The two finally finished the episode they had paused before moving on to the next one. Buck kept feeling his focus on the show slip as the exhaustion finally hit his brain. He kept having to peel his eyes back open just to focus.

Christopher started to drift off too. With one final yawn, he slipped off with a "Night Buck."

"Night buddy," the young firefighter replied as his eyes finally stayed shut.

When Eddie got back that morning, he found the two fast asleep with the TV still on.

[phoenixremix69]

Ok, just got into another youtube comment argument so time for another round of fandom bitching, and this time our topic of discussion is: Why Batman Who Laughs is fucking stupid and a disservice to both Batman and Joker's characters

let's start with general complaints i have over the character. First off, dumb name, dumb fucking name. None of the syllables flow together, it feels like you have to start and end a sentence with each word. there's a reason most comic are named either with one word or they flow together. Just say these in your head. Joker, Lex Luthor, Batman Who Laughs. That's not even a name, that's a descriptor, that's not batman, that's specifically the version of batman who laughs a lot. Then, costume, super dumb, and i say this as a fan of multiple series where everyone dresses dumb. but He's just impractical. Full body leather gimp suit with a leather coat made out of orphans or whatever fine, but the spikes on the eyes? and don't give me some bullshit on "oh, it has tiny holes so he can see through and it looks badass. NO! that is both extremely dumb in a basic sense of seeing, and also it's not cool, it's about as cool as your 2012 oc with 2 different colored eyes and a sword for a dick

Then, let's talk about Bruce and how wasted he is as a character. If I had you describe Batman's major characteristics, what would you say? Maybe something about justice? his kids? his parents and need to avenge them? Well what if i told you there was a version of him that not only had none of those things but also acted the exact same as another character? Then it isn't the same guy, it's the other guy wearing him as a meatsuit. And not even in an interesting way, it's not like Bruce is fighting back or we can see him trapped in his head as he's forced to do awful things, nope. One second he's there, then the Joker happens

And on that matter, let's talk about Joker, and how both of his major characteristics are also ignored, those being his actual humor and his "one bad day" shtick. Now, humor is subjective, Joker's even more so. But he should at least be amusing to him! Releasing a gorilla with dynamite strapped to him in Gotham, making fish with his smile and trying to trademark them, acid filled banana cream pie to the face, those are Joker jokes, they're not funny to us, they're supposed to be funny to a crazy person. Where's BWL's jokes? oh i did something horrible to this guy, time to see if i can up it on this next guy. Boring! Next let's talk about "One bad day" as a concept in relation to the Batman series. Nearly every character has that day somewhere in his story run. Frieze, the day he got stuck in his suit, Jason that day in Ethiopia, Bruce obviously. And for Joker, that was his acid bath. It's a whole point that all of Gotham's supers are just normal people and then they have a really shitty day that pushes them off the end. Making what was once just a normal gangster with a theme into "Oh I'm an inescapable force in the universe, you can't kill me for real and if i really wanted to I could've killed the whole justice league years ago and i just didn't because I like playing with batman" Dumb, a major disservice to the entire character

Now, let's just imagine a version that I think both is way more in character, and also fixes what I think is the series' most major flaw: The lack of reaction to anything going on. We never see the kid's reaction to their dad being suddenly gone, we never see Bruce's friends react, we don't even know how actual Joker feels about what's going on. And It start's with Bruce dying. Not in a fight, or assassinated, his body just finally conking out from years of abuse and stress. and from his will, he asks to be cremated so Ras can't drag him back, he's just gone. Now, not only do we get the fam's and all his justice buddies' reactions, we get to see Joker's. and he hates it. Suddenly, life is boring, he never won. He never killed Batman and Batman never killed him. It's like starting a dnd campaign but your dm moves to Texas midway through. Sure he can still scheme and the kids still stop him, but there's no rush anymore, no edge. But then he gets an idea! What if, he becomes Batman! and then he can make a new nemesis and the game starts all over again but he's on the opposite side. And now everyone has to deal with a Joker who's running around saving people in a new costume(Still piss scared of him by the way) pissing on their friend and family's memory

[theheromira]

Nimona appreciation post (Part 4 of idk how many there will be)

Sorry that took so long, I was a bit preoccupied with farming for Rizzley (Wriothesley in Genshin Impact) I'm just drinking some Tea and watching Nimona for probably the 50th time lol Sooo… here you go: Part 4 (again: GIF for attention)

Bal waking up, noticing the blanket, looking around, seeing the tea and candles (completely ignoring the hilt of the morning star behind te cup) and just sighing kind of content as if he wakes up like this often is just precious and supptly highlights his relationship with Amb and I just kind of love it, I guess

also Bal being awake and alert right away even tho he was just about to relax cause he prob thought he's with Amb and all is good and stuff is also kind of competent again

Nimona just vibing

"Go" by Santigold is just so good, how did I never heard of that one before?

also how Bal looks at Nim (prob) destroying his kitchen is funny as hell, idk

her eyes reflecting the lightning is a neat lil detail

Nim never bats an eye while she lies like this

also Bals reaction is soooo good, Riz Ahmed nailed this roll (all of the VAs did, but honestly: without him the movie wouldn't be the same)

first time Nim tells him directly not to be so gullible, but he remains so gullible

Breakfast Tacos

She dragged him in what form tho? If his head bounced on the sidewalk it probably couldn't have been her Gorilla or Horse form, I guess. What do y'all think?

"Totally happened."

"Evil Larry" is a much better name than the german version ("Böser Tiger" = "evil tiger" because one wird for evil in german is "bösartiger" and well, they took the pun but it sounds so stupid, idk… it isn't even a name)

Nimonas lil handgesture when she says: "That's a great villain name." also her face when she gets the idea for Evil Larry

"Never gonna happen.", he says with a very much Nope-Face "Whatever, Larry", she says without a fruk to give

Sick murderwall

I will not go into much detail about the contents of the muderwall here, but damn, the really didn't need to go that hard on those details

One thing I'm gonna cram in here tho cause I just saw the portrait of the queen: I recently read somewhere that they wanted to get Dr. Blitzmeyer (I hope I remember her name correctly lol) in the movie but ultimately scrapped her buuut they kept the design/color scheme for the queen and I just… Blitzmeyer helped and supported Comic!Bal, the queen helped and supported Movie!Bal (even if it's a bit of a different relationship, I guess) and that's kinda cute ngl. I kinda missed Dr. Blitzmeyer, she was my fav character in the comic and I was a bit sad that she didn't make it into the movie

Bals face (and probably the camera movement) when he remembers what happened when they broke out of the institute reminds me of some anime protag who goes a bit insane, but I can't remember a particular anime I feel remembered of

Bal always the knight, trying to get his sword when he feels threatened, even tho he doesn't even have it on him

the hand gesture to "Meatball" lol and also: very nice line delivery by Chloe Grace Moretz, she's also a big part of why I liked the character of Nimona (even tho I also like her design and personality, without a good VA a character can be not that likeable, if you know what I mean)

again with the eyes reflecting lightning, I love the lighting in this movie so much

she is in fact a massive, fire-breathing something

Bals brain just overheated and he decided to just roll with it and ask

She's Nimona. (one of my fav lines ever and I love that she get's to say that in at least one other scene)

I have a feeling that Bals answer to "I'm Nimona." ("That is not an answer.") is maybe something trans/genderfluid people get more than me (and def shouldn't cause why do they need to even get that? Why can't everyone just accept stuff like that?)

Bal getting at least one question is actually very nice of Nim ngl

also him not asking something about her but why she's helping him is kinda neat, I think he felt that that maybe would be a bit to much in Nimonas personal space atm

Bals eyes widen for just a second when Nim answers him and he remembers what situation he is in is kinda sad (btw. much of this movie wouldn't worked for me if they weren't so damn much animated/if they wouldn't be so much little details in the gestures, mannerisms and whatnot of the people)

him straight going to thinking-mode when looking at the murder.. I mean innocence wall

Bal looking sad at Ambs portrait is kind of a mood ngl

also him kind of forcing himself to look away (down), breathing in and then looking at the complete wall again is so very human, those charcters just feel to real

best photo of Diego (the squire)

Love how Nim wants to say kill him and stops herself when Bal turns towards her, without a doubt with a look on his face that says: Noooooo, bad shapeshifter

His reaction to "Let's got get him. You and me." is priceless lol

Bals hesitation (and probably inner monolouge) is kinda fun to see but also very undertandable, I mean: he knows her how long now? And even tho he redeems himself fast enough, here he is very much and very heavy still under the brain washing of the Institute and knows now that Nim is not human, so I kinda understand why he's so hesitant but he's desperate and she can (and will) voluntarily help him

Nim just rubbing salt in the wound, cause she knows exactly that he doesn't have much of a choice

He clearly wondered how she got there so fast and I love these kind of little reactions throughout the movie, they show how vigilant the character are and it feels even more real, cause let's be honest: if you're talking to someone who is like 10 steps away, you blink and then they are right before you, you'd also not gloss over that without so much as a second glance, would you?

love that Nim already moved from Sidekick-for-a-evil-villain to clear-his-name-and-be-a-hero-sidekick

Bal still not really trusting her but debating it

the shark transformation is just nice: the fluidity, the sound effect, Nims look, the lighting, the fact that you probably didn't really expect it, just *chefs kiss*

her "I'm not a girl, I'm a shark." is also very iconic, even tho it's used just one time in the movie; still one of the best lines ngl also her face when she says "But I'm not a girl." and the lil bite animation and sound is very nice

"Hey. You ever put your head in the mouth of one of these?", that line delivery and the animation for that and Bal already being done with the convo lol

"Should've just stayed in jail." lol

That's it for this part, I hope y'all are ok with the length, it really feels a bit smoother to write ^^ Have a good one and until next time :)

[heathensimmer]

University-New Dormies!!!

This will just be a Tumblr post since it's shorter. The last of my empty dormitories is finally getting gradually filled with new students!

I wonder who they'll be?

Choosing randomly from a list of the Sims who occupy this dorm in Sims 3 University Life, I chose Tammy Parker and Millie Grubb (bc tbh they both had some traits that I'm testing too.)

Tammy has the Mean-Spirited, Flirty, a Party Animal and three more really fun traits. Let's see how this goes lol

Lemme get that wide shot real quick. This is Malan Hall!

It's a rainy, gloomy Monday but that won't stop Tammy, a sophomore, and Millie, a freshman, from moving in quickly before the other dormies take over!

Went ahead and made Tammy’s dorm room look more realistic and decorated. I didn’t change Millie’s much

I also hacked the hell out of the dormitory by placing inconspicuous models of mods all around the house. This is the "Uni Break Object" which allows classes to stop. I use it to simulate weekends during Uni as well as fall/winter break.

And yes, I know there are different models of Batbox, but unfortunately for me, I am very selectively lazy and no I don't know why. So I stuck Batbox in a fenced in area, imagining it was something from the SimCity state government installed on every public lot or some bullshit idk XD

Ugh. Every timeeeee it rains. Lol. At least none of the students are noticing. The rain put it out.

Well, actually, I think Millie noticed it because she just ran outside, after it had been put out. Now that you're here, Millie, why don't you look at that town before you to explore? Totally clock the gorilla on top of SimBurger. Iconic.

Uh-Oh, I heard voices from upstairs and it looks like Holly is disagreeing with whatever he's saying. I did make her super grouchy. Her traits are Mean-Spirited, Athletic, Flirty, Party Animal, and Charismatic.

Hmmm. A connoisseur of meanness, possibly?

I imagined, with that set of traits, her personality to be this:

And there's my first mod in play. It's still being tested in bunches of scenarios, as you can see by the fact that I change households often. Tammy decided to autonomously argue with Jerome Hart because she has the Mean-Spirited trait. I decided to continue this behavior because she obviously enjoys it so I chose to Insult him.

Jerome does NOT look too happy. And LOOK AT THIS SOOO FUNNY

😂

I am CACKLING. Poor Amin in the back trying to play pool in peace listening to Tammy denigrate this poor sap. Oh my God, Amin's face. And they say Sims 4 sims have "emotions" XD his face is literally giving the meme "Aight, Imma head out" even tho the Sim is likely just focused on pool. Top tier storytelling.

Tune in next time to this series of posts showing you the potential of Sims 2! Will Tammy fulfill her Lifetime Want of Become Captain Hero or will her traits make her choose a different path?

[useless-bi-otch]

Cookies'n Cream - Chapter 18

Last chapter / MasterList / art by @aneenasevla

Chapter 18 - Curiosity Killed the Gorilla

"... Aaand it's sent! Now we just wait for the likes, shares and comments about how lucky I am for the company."

"My God, you really want me to kiss you here in the middle of the street, don't you? Because that's what it looks like," Tomori jokes, giving him a playful push, to which Okubo laughs. The push didn't even make him move, but it was enough of an excuse for him to place a hand on her back and leave it there, in a discreet caress. He shows her the cracked phone screen.

"Save it for when the likes start to come, lady. Then I'll feel like I've earned it," He winks, supporting her as they get off the train to the crowded station. "But there's something you can do for me right now."

"What?"

"Hold my hand so I don't lose sight of you in the middle of this crowd. You're so short that I fear you'll be swallowed by this sea of ​​people and I'll never see you again..."

"You clown," She pats the hand he offered her. "In that case, take advantage of your privileged view and guide us out of this crowd. And tell me how the weather is there among the clouds, while you're at it. Any sign of rain?"

"Nope! Clear sky, few clouds, the first stars appearing along with the soft and pleasant tones of twilight," He looks up as they leave the station. "Perfect weather for a walk to your neighborhood. It's the first time I've followed you home on foot, now that I'm thinking about it..."

“It's a good walk until there. It's sort of part of my weekly workout, in addition to the weightlifting sessions I do at home."

“I'd love to attend a session like that one of these days,” he comments, smiling at the thought. He could give her tips, do demonstrations, tell funny experiences he had in gyms... and of course, seeing her wearing a sports bra and leggings would be a nice bonus. "I'm not exactly a trainer, but I know enough to give you some directions, if you like."

"Oh, would you look at this…," She turns her head to the side at him, smiling playfully. "First he offers to help me with baseball batting, and then to give me tips on working out. I'm starting to think this is a very well thought out scheme of yours to start a career in coaching, with me being your first attempt."

"It wouldn't be a very profitable scheme, considering that I don't charge anything more than a few kisses and a few hours in your company," He joins in the joke. "It's just that I can't get enough of how much we have in common. It makes me want to keep trying to figure out if there's something I like that you don't, and vice versa."

"Well, just ask! We've been asking questions about each other's lives, all these times we've gone out together, afterall," She smiles and, this time, she's the one who offers him her hand. "And now the opportunity is perfect, because we're going to my house. A well-reserved, non-public place, where there aren't a bunch of voices around to disturb our conversation..."

... Okay, when she put it like that, it was even easier for him to understand the size of the step they were taking.

They had gone out together a few more times after their successful second date that resulted in their first kiss, and to various other places besides the batting cages at the sports center: a walk around Shibuya, two trips to the movies, a walk through Ueno Park with riding pedal boats and even going to a maid cafe, just for the pleasure of their inside joke. All these encounters ended the same way as the original: him leaving her at the door of her house, but not before exchanging some heated kisses, which were getting longer and longer, neither wanting to say good night and goodbye. None of these times did she invite him into her home.

But now that seemed about to change, and he felt a strange rush of anxiety overwhelm him at the thought. A mixture of want and a slight fear of what that could mean for the two of them. I mean, calling your current date to your house was a lot more serious than suggesting they go get some love in a motel, wasn't it?

He wonders, rather involuntarily, if she would like him to invite her to his apartment too, in the near future. Holy shit, he'd have to give the place a good sweep before that happened, he wouldn't know where to hide his face if she saw the mess that was his place...

"Naoya...?"

He is unceremoniously roused from his reverie by her voice, calling to him with some concern. She was looking at him with one eyebrow arched, her hand still outstretched, fingers opening and closing slightly.

"Is everything okay? You looked worried all of a sudden... ooh, is it the hands?," She moved her arm away, embarrassed. "Sorry, you don't have to feel obligated to do that if you don't want to-"

"I do!," He hurries to answer, his voice a little louder than necessary, extending his hand to hold hers and prevent it from getting out of his reach. "Sorry, I started to think about some things here and got distracted..."

"Do you want to share them with me? Or would you rather keep your schemes on how to make me this generation's next model athlete a secret?"

"I would keep them secret from the public and the press, never from you, hahaha. But no, seriously... I...," He looks to the side, feeling his palms sweat. "Is this really okay? Me, going to your house...?"

"Of course it is! Why wouldn't it be?," She asks, smiling gently as if to reassure him. "I didn't invite you the other times only because we always came back a little late from dates. But now it's not even seven o'clock. It's still too early for us to say goodbye..."

He would've rocketed up if that had been humanly possible, joy making his feet light and even dancing.

"I agree! It's just that I would've brought something if I'd known. A souvenir, as the custom demands..."

"You already gave me too many souvenirs, hahaha! Enough flowers for me to open my own flower shop, remember?," She jokes, lightly hitting the side of her hip on his thigh, which was what she could reach from that height. "Now I'm the one who wants to reciprocate. What do you think about eating a savory dish of mine for a change?"

"Wow, I'm in! I mean, I've already eaten sandwiches made by you at the bakery, but not a real dinner," He smiles openly, and unconsciously puts a hand on his belly. "Just thinking about it makes me hungry, damn it..."

“And after you tell me that, do you really expect me to let you go willingly? A cook's life's mission is to feed others, especially those she cares about!," She raises a fist with determination, and he chuckles softly.

"You sound like Sanji from One Piece when you talk like that, hahaha! Who's your favorite Straw Hat?," He asks excitedly, but this excitement wanes a little before the slightly embarrassed smile she opens.

"Uh… Chopper, I guess…? I don't know, I haven't watched One Piece since highschool..."

"Oh, I see… sorry, it's just that I'm such a nerd…," He scratches the back of his head, now just as embarrassed. "The girls I've gone out with were always bored with my conversations. I end up forgetting that this is not really your thing..."

"Hey, you're stereotyping again," She points at him with an indignant pout. "I'm not really into manga and anime, but it's not because I'm a woman. Kanny herself loves One Piece, you know?"

"Really? Damn, I'd like chatting with her about it if she wasn't hating me right now..."

"You can chat about it with me. It's not because I'm not a fan that I wouldn't want to hear you talking about your interests," She squeezes his hand to reassure him. "Seriously, we don't need to have absolutely everything in common. It's actually good that we don't, so we discover new things that we might like."

"Heh… you're right," He intertwines his fingers with hers, smiling again, now more relieved. "And I tell you the same, okay? You can talk to me about the things you like, not just martial arts and baseball."

"Heh, I hope you don't get bored..."

“You'll be amazed at how open-minded I can be. Let's have a chat about women's interests. For example, if you prefer to get a Helsa skirt or Swarovski crystal earrings..."

"Hell no, forget about it! I'm serious, don't laugh! Ugh, you big meathead...!," She punches him in the arm, to which he throws his head back with a thunderous laugh. "I think I'd rather get a box of those chocolates again than that..."

"Noted! I'll bring one with at least half a kilo of chocolate next time...just kidding!," He exclaims when she gives him a threatening look. "But seriously, I promise I'll listen to you when you want to talk about your interests too. I'm really curious now..."

"We can talk better over dinner. It'll take a little while to be rady, but we can do other things while we wait. You've never seen the inside of my house, for example," She comments, a little thoughtful. "It's kinda funny to think that Rihito has been there, but you haven't."

"Yeah, he made a point of throwing that in my face a few weeks ago," Okubo snorts grumpily. And he arches an eyebrow when she sees Tomori getting suddenly tense . "What is it?"

“Did he… tell you about my interior decorating choices?”

"Uh… if you're talking about the posters in the living room, he did tell me," He nods after thinking a bit. "But I'm not someone to dictate how you should decorate your house, Tomori. And again, I don't judge your tastes... if you promise not to judge my Ultraman posters if you visit my apartment one day, haha."

"I won't, I promise," She laughs, a little calmer. And then thinks better about what he said, blushing a little. "But would you do that? Invite me to your apartment, I mean..."

"Sure, why not? It's only fair," He nods excitedly. "Then I can show you my trophy room, my reading room, my consoles... I just think we'd have to order a pizza at dinner time, because my fridge has seen fuller days , haha ​​ha!"

"I'm starting to think that the questionable diet of single men isn't necessarily an unfounded stereotype," She jokes, and then points, "Oh, we're already around the corner! I think that was the fastest walk I've ever taken from the station to here..."

"Yeah, I didn't even notice the path I took either," He comments, a little surprised. It was amazing how time seemed to fly by when he was with Tomori. He would've moaned about it in another situation, but not now. They didn't have to say goodbye on her doorstep. They would still have many hours together from now on.

"Hopefully, we'll have all night."

The thought filled him with a rush to get to her house, and he tried to contain it. Why bother if the night has already been won? And any extra time with her was a win, whatever they were doing.

They are soon through the automatic gates, stepping onto the stone path that leads to the porch. The overhead light came on, and she smiled at him.

"Before we go inside, I want to start our little ritual."

He blinks, confused. "Ritual? What ritual-"

She interrupts him by raising her right hand, hooking her fingers in the fabric of his shirt, and making him duck with a small tug. Their mouths meet, and soon Okubo's initial astonishment is replaced by an almost euphoric satisfaction. Hell, in what universe would he deny her a kiss? He reciprocates promptly, one hand automatically going to her back as hers rest on his shoulders. Soon the contact gets a little more intense, and he finds himself pulling her off the ground with a hug. She holds on to him more firmly so she doesn't lose her balance, asking for more by touching his lips with her tongue, and he obliges with an enthusiasm that made her chuckle softly.

Damn, seeing his excitement being so well received did lots of good to his self-esteem, as well as his libido. And if that meant that she wanted it as much as he did... dammit, then the dessert that came after that dinner would be the best he'd ever tasted!

They finally pull away when the need for oxygen becomes impossible to ignore, panting softly and looking into each other's eyes. He puts her down slowly, and she gives him one last peck before smiling at him.

"Just for luck..."

"Believe me, I'm feeling very lucky right now," He jokes, his voice husky. "Best ritual I've ever done. I think it's good that we always do this from now on, so that luck never ends."

“Never wasting time, not in the octagons or out of them.” She laughs softly, squeezing his hand one last time before digging through her purse for something. She takes out the keys and unlocks the door, leaving it open for him to enter right behind her. "Leave your shoes by the door, please."

"Alright," He nods, muttering an 'excuse me' and giving a quick bow before taking off his shoes and entering, having to bend down a little to do it. He busies himself with observing his surroundings while Tomori leaves her purse in the coat rack next to the door.

After walking down a long corridor, they arrive in the small living room of what was the interior of a typical middle-class residence, with enough space to accommodate a couple without children or a small family. For a single woman who lived on her own, that should be more than enough, he supposed. It was in a slightly more western style, which was common in Tokyo's newer residential areas. Two sofas, one small and one medium, with a tea table in the center on a cream-colored rug, and against the wall, a television on a wooden cabinet. In the center of the table was a vase, and inside it, the daisies, gerberas and gladioli that he had given her a few days ago; seeing that she was taking care of the flowers made him immensely happy.

Separated from the living room by a counter was the kitchen, also small but looking professionally equipped; nothing more than expected for a chef. The dining table was also small, but that would only make the diner even more intimate. He saw other vases with more flowers there, adding color to the room. The stairs in the corner must lead to the upper floor where the bedrooms and bathroom were.

In general, it would be an absolutely normal residence if it weren't for one detail: the posters of different sizes on the walls, some glued, others framed like photographs. They were all from fighters he either knew personally or had seen in action on television or the internet. Sekibayashi's was one of those privileged enough to be framed, as was Gaolang's. The twinge of jealousy that hit him was short-lived, however; it was enough time for him to notice his own poster, also framed, striking a victorious pose while displaying the championship belt around his waist.

"Uh... so...?," Tomori suddenly asks, arms crossed, seeming to want to look at everything but him. "I know it's a bit exaggerated and that it looks more like a teenager's bedroom than the living room of an grown woman's house..."

"I haven't seen too many teenage bedrooms or too many grown women's living rooms to make a comparison," He jokes, scratching the back of his head with a low chuckle. "Honestly? From what Rihito said, I was expecting something much more 'hall of fame-ish', if you know what I mean, hahaha!"

"If my living room was something of that level, I'd have to charge you visitation," She jokes too, smiling sheepishly. "So… you don't mind?"

"It's not like I have the right to, come on," He shrugs calmly. "Again, it's your house, Tomori. And honestly, there are fewer posters than I was expecting."

This ends up making her laugh, her shoulders shaking. "What? Were you expecting to see my living room walls completely covered in posters, to the point where you couldn't even see their colors?"

"Hey, hey, my informant was Rihito, and you've met enough of him to know how he's always adding tails to his tales," He justifies himself, and it's his turn to be embarrassed. "No, seriously, your place's nice. Tidier than mine, that's for sure. And you have good taste in idols, no denying," He points to his own poster, arching an eyebrow. "Who's the hunk over there? Do I need to see him as a rival for your affections or something?"

She laughs out loud this time, even though she's still blushing. "Nah, no need to! Not anymore, anyway," She looks at the poster, her eyes softening. "He used to be an idea I had in my head, you know. The idea of ​​someone who would be a source of admiration and inspiration personified, like Seki, Gaolang and many others. Someone far above, out of my reach. But what I'm seeing in front of me now...," She looks at him over her shoulder. "This someone is someone I can laugh with, joke with and talk to, someone I can touch, hug and kiss... so I prefer him much, much more."

Okubo can only stare at her, dumbfounded, his plans to make fun of her over her former idolization of him going down the drain in a way he couldn't have foreseen. Again, she left him speechless without even trying very hard to.

That was probably one of the things that would never change about their relationship, no matter how deep it got. And after that, he wanted anything but that to change.

He moves before he knows it, and Tomori gasps as he takes her in his arms, lifting her off the ground again to reach her mouth, in a kiss even more intense than the one they exchanged on the porch. She hugs him around the neck to steady herself, reciprocating with a low, long sigh, and Okubo shudders as she wraps her legs around his waist. He automatically holds her tighter, not wanting to move an inch away from her.

Holy shit… if it continued at this rate, they'd end up skipping dinner. He blamed that adorable creature who could wrap a grown man almost twice her size around her little finger for that. He wanted so badly to take her to the bedroom, or who knows, to lay her down on that couch and give her the treatment she deserved...

“Not with all these posters around staring at you, dipshit!”

Shit, the posters… he suddenly felt very aware of the dead stares of the fighters depicted on the walls, especially those he knew on a personal level. It was ridiculous, but it seemed to be the same principle as a religious person refusing to do something sinful in front of a representation of the deity they worshiped. As if Sekibayashi, Gaolang and all the others were watching his performance and judging him.

And with that thought, his excitement died pretty quickly. Hey, maybe he had found the ideal method to get rid of morning wood!

"Hnnn...," He murmurs low against her lips, giving it one last lick before pulling his face away to breathe. "And he's also enjoying doing all these things with you. He wants to do so much more. And he's feeling really stupid for talking about himself in third person."

Tomori laughs, leaning her forehead against his. "I think that's cute of him… okay, okay, I'll stop," She promises when he huffs. "But seriously, I had imagined that you'd be uncomfortable seeing your own face on my living room wall. Maybe I shouldn't have hung the poster up there again..."

"Then I would be offended that there is no tribute to me on the living room walls of my number one fan!," He snorts, but his tone remains playful. "I'm used to seeing my own face on television, on magazine covers and on the street screens in Shibuya. But… this one's definitely not one of my best angles,” He scowls at the poster.

"Why not? This is the portrait of the moment when you were enshrined as the first Japanese to become Ultimate Fight's heavyweight champion! It's glorious," She snaps back in mock outrage, whereupon he sets her down to place his hands on his hips.

"Yeah, but not in this picture! Look how the light hits my head," He points. "The sweat makes it look like a disco ball... yeah, laugh at the bald man, very empathetic of you," He snorts as he watches her bend over herself a bit, wiping a tear of laughter from one eye.

"S-Sorry, but it's hard to empathize with someone who is bald by choice. And anyway, that's your opinion. I really like this poster and I think you look great in it," She pats the frame, smiling excitedly. "It's the result of all the sweat and tears you've shed to get to where you are, a slap in the face to all who doubted you, an irrefutable proof of how right you were when you said that the defeatism of the Japanese martial arts leagues was nothing more than underdog syndrome, excuses from those who talk a lot and do little!"

Okubo can't resist, laughing happily. "Damn, I've missed those passionate speeches of yours about me, hahaha! But seriously, it's really nice to see someone who positively interpreted the crap I said in that documentary..."

"It wasn't crap! ... Okay, maybe that final jab of yours was unnecessary," She admits after thinking a little. "It was by far what made people be mad at you the most in those days."

"Yeah, it's kinda unforgettable when cancel culture bites you in the butt fot the first time, hehehe!"

"And he even takes pride in it, my god…," She laughs along with him. "But in general, I agreed with everything you said in that documentary. In fact...," She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, suddenly shy. "It was after watching it that I found the motivation to change my life."

Okubo stops smiling, surprise and curiosity taking over his features. "Change your life…? Oh, are you talking about your delinquent phase?"

"Well, yes, in a way... oh, but if we were to talk about it now, we'd going to be here in the living room all night and dinner would never get ready!," She suddenly claps her hands together, rubbing them afterwards. "We can talk better while we eat, how about that?"

“Uh… sure, that's fine with me.” He nods, taken aback, but dammit, how could he refuse food when she was the one offering it? "Want some help? I'm no chef like you, but I can cut and wash some vegetables, I don't know."

"Well, since you're offering...," She nods, smiling "Just wash your hands first, please. The bathroom is upstairs."

"Yes ma'am!," He salutes, eliciting an affectionate eye roll from her before she turns and heads for the kitchen. He climbs the stairs to the upper floor, which consisted of a long corridor, with two doors on the left and one on the right.

Now... which of the three was the entrance to the bathroom? Damn, she hadn't told him which door was the right one. Maybe it was the first... but for who's going up the stairs or for who's going down? And why was he making a fuss about something so stupid?!

"You're afraid of accidentally walking into her room... which is pretty stupid considering your night will end there."

The thought lifted his confidence a little. Heck, if he missed the door on the first try, he could just close it and try again. He does so, choosing the lone door on the right.

It wasn't the bathroom, but it didn't look like a bedroom either, as there wasn't a bed in there. In the dim light from the hallway, he thought for a second that it was a spare room being used as a storage room. There were boxes stacked in a corner, rectangular white objects propped against them. They looked like... canvases?

Okubo couldn't help his curiosity and groped along the wall until he found a switch. The room lit up, and he found himself in front of what looked like a small crafts room. At least that's what he assumed when he saw himself in front of the painted canvases propped up in the boxes, the small shelf partially filled with colored pencils, graphite, brushes and a few paint pots, a desk with piles of papers full of doodles and a easel, right in the center of the room.

And there were pictures too. Not wall posters of fighters this time, but framed photographs, attached to a magnetic photo board or in frames that filled the other half of the shelf. Many were from people he had never seen before, but who bore enough resemblance to Tomori that he assumed they were her family: an older couple, who must’ve been her parents, and a younger man accompanied by a woman of the same age; probably her brother and sister-in-law.

But his interest was entirely focused on the photos where she appeared, especially the older ones. There he found familiar faces: Tomori with Kanami and Hiro, the three of them looking like they were in their teens (holy shit, was it just him or did Kanami used to be chubby when she was younger? Those extra pounds definitely weren't the muscles he saw). They appeared in a lot of those photos, at the most varied times. And in many of them, there was another girl with them, with tanned skin and curly, dyed blonde hair. She appeared with only Tomori in several photos, one of which depicted both of them wearing school uniforms.

And what captured his curiosity the most about these older photos was that in almost all of them, Tomori's hair wasn't wavy and brown, but straight and black. So that current hue and texture was unnatural? Damn, he'd never have guessed just by looking...

Just as he never would've guessed that she was an amateur artist. He didn't explore the room more and peek at her work only because it would be tremendously impolite. But he might ask when he returned downstairs. He turns off the light and closes the door slowly, not sure if he feels more guilty for snooping or curious about what he's seen.

He tries the first door on the left this time, and luckily it was a bathroom; a room with three sections, consisting of the tiny laundry room, the toilet and sink area, and the shower and bath area, all separated by thin walls. The bathtub seemed small, and he found himself thinking sadly that it would be next to impossible for the two of them to be able to bathe together there. Well, the bathtub in his apartment was big enough for both of them, so that was all the more reason for him to invite her over there one of these days.

He turns on the faucet and washes his hands, taking the opportunity to check his reflection in the mirror. He looked presentable, but dammit, he'd only taken a quick shower in the morning before accompanying his friends to Kazuo's office, and from there he'd taken two walks, one to the bakery and the other to Tomori's house. Did he not smell of sweat? And what about his breath after eating? Maybe he should at least use the mouthwash right there in the sink, or take off his shirt and give his armpits a quick wash with soap just in case. The mood would sour pretty quickly if he smelled bad...

He suddenly feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. He hadn't asked her for her Wi-Fi password, so his mobile data must still be on. He dries his hands and checks his messages. There were some from Rihito, in their group chat.

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

just to let you know, @EggHead, we're in kaneda's place

we couldn't resist, biohazard 8 was calling us with siren songs

sorry, we'll do another game night with ya on a free day

Okubo rolls his eyes, but the truth is, he wasn't exactly upset. He had no right to demand that his friends not have fun without him. But he was glad to know they were at least considerate enough to let him know.

EggHead:

no worries man

tell me what games he has there later

enjoy the night on your side and I’ll enjoy in mine lol

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

uh

i wasn't expecting you to answer now

what, she couldn't stand your smell and told you to wash it off first? 

Hahahaha

EggHead:

fuck you dude lol

she's making dinner and I'm going to help

did ur mom never teach you that you can’t have dessert before dinner?

have some manners

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

lmao you worthless pervert

yeah, gorge yourself on dinner and then go eat the hell of that dessert

just be careful not to fall mouth first in her plushies by accident lol

EggHead:

???

the fuck you mean?

what plushies?

have some respect you fucker

talking about her lady bits like that

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

LMAO

what lady bits

fuckin dumbass

i'm talkin about stuffed animals lol

EggHead:

ooooh

okay i got it now

but seriously, what plushies?

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

and you still ask

she is all cute, girly-girl and shit

i'm pretty sure her bed must be full of that stuff

Okubo frowns. The mental image that those words painted... he shivers a little. Damn, that sounded so wrong!

EggHead:

wait, you really think so?

fuckin hell...

when it’s not one thing, it’s another

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

are you going to let that slow you down?

going limp over stuffed animals is the last fuckin straw LOL

I wouldn't give a single fuck

EggHead:

it's easy for you to say talk!

you're not the one who will have one knee on the mattress and the other on top of Mockey!

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

LMAOOOOOO I'M GONNA PISS IN MY PANTS

Gigolo:

holy shit dude

rihito hollered for the entire building to hear

i even came to see what it is, let me read it

LMAOOOO

it's the my little pony squad getting in the way of egghead's dick weting session xD

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

ROTFL

again, i wouldn't give a shit 

but go check it for yourself to be sure

GiantKiller: 

oh my xD

but go check it?

are you talking about him going to snoop on her room??

this is wrong on so many levels!

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

it’s just for conscience relief man!

that way he doesn’t get scared and goes all limp-dick in the worst time possible

GiantKiller:

it's still wrong

if it bothers you so much, Okubo, see if there isn’t another more appropriate place for it

EggHead:

there's another room

a crafts room it seems

she's apparently an amateur artist, can you believe that?

it's full of art supplies like canvases, pencils, brushes, even an easel

Gigolo:

we know

miss uta told kaneda and I that she likes to paint and illustrate

EggHead:

WHAT??!

WHEN???

GiantKiller:

on wednesday before the sunday rihito went to talk to her

himuro tought she might like it, considering she likes doing cookie art

she confirmed it when he asked

EggHead:

and why didn't you fuckin tell me anything???

you had information like that laying around and you didn’t think about sharing it with me??

Gigolo:

what difference does that make now?

EggHead:

it makes a difference because I could've bought her a gift based on that!

fucking hell dude

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

lmao cry me a river

no, cry her a river, preferably on her bed 

EggHead:

that's exactly what i'm gonna do

fuck the plushies, and fuck you guys too

fair weather friends

Gigolo:

LMAOOO dude's fuckin pissed

you guys are good again, you're on her house and you're about to get laid

the fuck you complaining about?

GiantKiller:

and thanks to us, by the way

don't be ungrateful, Okubo

AND DON'T GO SNOOPING INTO HER ROOM

EggHead:

okay, okay, my bad

thanks you bastards

and I need to at least prepare myself for what i'm gonna see, kaneda

i'll just open her bedroom door, I won’t even go in

GiantKiller:

for god's sake

at least be discreet

don’t go through her drawers or anything

EggHead:

dude i won't touch anything

i'm not rihito

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

man fuck you

i'm a bit of a pervert, but i'm not a sicko

EggHead:

yeah, right

anyway, i'll be off now

she must be wondering why i'm taking so long, i won’t keep her waiting

see ya

Okubo puts his phone away again, cursing under his breath. Damn Rihito for putting absurd mental images in his head that didn't help his arousal at all. How the hell was he supposed to perform in a room full of cuddly plushies, staring at him with those beaded eyes exuding innocence and motherly disapproval?!

He takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself. If so, he'd have to swallow his discomfort, for Tomori's sake. He really had no right to complain about her decorating choices. And anyway, spending that time with her, showing how much he wanted things between them to work out and go forward, showing how important she had become to him; all of that was worth far more than his attempts to protect his fragile ego.

He leaves the bathroom, slowly closing the door behind him, before facing the only other door left. It could only be her room. And to peek into such an intimate room without the hostess's permission was despicable, worthy of a clueless pervert...

“I won't touch anything. I won't even go in. I'll just open the door and turn on the light, nothing more...”

With that promise to himself, he goes to the door, gripping the handle and holding his breath before slowly opening it. The room was dark, the light from the hallway only partially illuminating it. He could see a single bed, a desk with a computer, stationery and a couple of framed pictures, a bookcase and... his own face?

Okubo blinks. He gropes along the wall, finding the switch and turning on the light. And what he saw made him wish that the room was full of plushies instead of... that.

There were posters of fighters everywhere. The walls almost disappeared beneath them. They were of all different sizes, some small enough to have been cut out of magazines, and others huge, almost the width of the door itself. His was in a prominent position, just above the desk, and Sekibayashi's and Gaolang's flanked him as if they belonged to a boy band of muscleheads. And there were so many others, most his acquaintances, some even his rivals inside the octagons, and many of them looked old, worn, portraying younger versions of themselves.

All those shirtless, sometimes sweaty men flexing and showing off their impressive muscles, their expressions either triumphant or livid as if they were about to pounce on their opponent... all those dead gazes directed at the bed in the corner of the room...

If a turn-off was capable of producing sounds, his at that moment would have made the classic Pac-Man death sound. How the fuck would he be able to do anything inside that sanctuary which seemed to be dedicated to everything virile and gay?!

He quickly turns off the light and closes the door with an expression of someone who was suffering with PTSD. He swallows hard, sweating a little, his brain trying to register the scene he had just witnessed, the hemisphere responsible for rationality trying to convince him that it wasn't that bad, he could ignore it, he just needed to be on top of her and to not look at the fucking posters...!

But the other hemisphere, which was responsible for all the neurotic fantasies that had been curdling his thoughts lately, told him that, in the missionary position, Sekibayashi, Gaolang and all those others would have a very privileged view of his ass.

Okubo buries his face in his left hand, groaning hard, wanting to slam his forehead against the wall, as much to punish himself as to forget what he had just seen. Why the hell did he open that door?! That's what he got for sticking his nose where it didn't belong! Curiosity killed the cat, or in this case, the gorilla.

"Naoya?," He hears Tomori calling from downstairs. "Is everything okay up there? Do you need help with something?"

He shudders, clearing his throat quickly to make his voice as normal as possible before replying, “Uuh- no, it's okay! It's just that I received a few messages and decided to reply right away, so no notifications would disturbed us..."

"Oh, okay! I've already laid out the ingredients here on the counter if you're ready to start."

"Alright!," He goes down the stairs, trying to think of something, anything, to use as an excuse to book it. He wouldn't be able to do anything in that disturbing room, not even if he took a few blue bombers like an old man. It wouldn't happen in the living room either, and he didn't want their first time to be in the kitchen either...

Hell, it didn't take a genius to know that nothing was going to happen that night! The best thing was for him to leave, for him to find any excuse to take the road, because otherwise he would only be wasting Tomori's time. Maybe he could come up with some sort of emergency? He's trying to come up with one that sounds convincing enough when he walks into the kitchen. Tomori lifts her head and smiles excitedly at him.

"Look! I checked the fridge and saw that I had all the ingredients to make ginger pork," She points to a meat board on the kitchen counter, where there were pork strips, still raw. "I know it's not very elaborate or sophisticated, but I guarantee you that my ginger pork is delicious! Can you help me with the onions? The ginger is in that little jar with the blue cap," She makes a cute little happy sound. "I'm so excited to show you how I cook! I'm even getting a little nervous, hahaha..."

... Okubo felt like the worst person in the world, not worthy of that woman who was too good to be true.

How could he even think of running away from her house and letting her down, all because he'd paid the price for snooping? She deserved better treatment than that. Hell, she deserved all the best he could give her, even if the night wasn't going to end with them in a bed!

He wanted to stay there with her. He wanted to cook dinner with her, eat with her, talk, laugh, watch tv, anything. More physical things could be for later, and preferably far away from the homosexual sanctuary that was that room.

"Ahaha, what are you even saying? I'm the one who should be excited," He approaches, trying to smile. "After all, I'm going to see my favorite cook in action, besides being able to learn from her."

"You're a sweetheart, but you won't escape helping in the kitchen with just a few smooth words."

"And who said I want to escape it? Guide me through your kingdom of meats, vegetables and spices, miss, you'll have the privilege of having me as your humble follower again," He gestures to the whole kitchen with a sweeping wave of his arm. Tomori laughs, opening a drawer and pulling out a baby blue apron.

"With pleasure. Here, you'll need it," She throws him the apron, laughing again when he makes a face. "Relax, I promise it will be our secret. And look, we're matching!," She shows her own apron, which Okubo recognized as the one she wore in the selfie she sent him weeks ago.

"How cheesy... you're lucky I like cheesy things in secrecy," He jokes, putting on the apron just to appease her. It had frills and looked tiny on him. He snorts when she smirks at the sight, "Next time I'll bring my own apron."

"Heh… good to know there will be a next time," She comments smiling as she hands him another knife. "Cut the onions like this, into thin slices. And don't worry, they're ice cold so they won't sting your eyes."

"Really?"

"Yeah! Just leave them in the freezer for ten minutes and the enzymes that trigger the gas that causes burning are not activated," She explains excitedly. "Cool, right?"

"Wow, I didn't know that!," He comments, impressed, trying to cut the onions in the thickness she asked. "You're really knowledged in cooking stuff..."

"I have a degree in gastronomy for a reason," She sticks out her chest a little, in a gesture of personal pride that he found adorable. "Although this particular trick I learned from my mother. She cooks really well too."

"I can imagine. Was it because of her that you decided to pursue this career?," He asks, and she seems to think for a few seconds, looking up.

"Hnnn… yeah, in parts," She finally replies. "I liked to cook with her since I was a little girl. She was happy, saying I was going to be an excellent cook in the future. And an excellent wife," She smiles with embarrassment. "But I just liked doing things in the kitchen, seeing the happy expressions of those who ate my food and hearing compliments. I had other aspirations at the time..."

"Like art?," He asks before he manages to stop himself, and flinches a little when she looks at him with some surprise.

"Huh? ... Oh, you... you know that I...?"

"Yeah, I… I kinda accidentally saw your crafts room," He admits, a little embarrassed. "I was looking for the bathroom and opened the wrong door by mistake."

She blinks, looking even more surprised. "Oh… I was thinking that Himuro and Kaneda had told you that I liked painting and illustrating, since I had mentioned it to them before."

... Ouch. His big-ass mouth: one. Subtlety: zero. It was just like him to rattle and get himself into trouble when he could very well have gotten away with it if he'd just kept quiet. He shrinks further.

"Sorry, it was an accident..."

"No, it's okay," She assured, waving the hand that held the knife. "It was my fault, I forgot to tell you which door was the right one. And there's nothing extremely personal or embarrassing about that room that makes it a no-go zone for visitors, hahaha!"

He laughed along with her, because at this point, laughing was preferable to screaming hysterically and looking like a lunatic.

"Hehe, if- if you say so... but seriously, I really didn't know that you liked to draw and paint. And I guess I should've guessed, considering your cookies are a work of art."

"Awn, thanks!," She blushes with pleasure at the compliment. "I thought about majoring in visual arts in college, but my parents protested so much that I gave up. They're afraid I wouldn't get a good job and good references on my CV... yeah, I know, they sound controlling," She nods when she sees his sympathetic expression. "They even tried to push me to study law, medicine or architecture, which was the major my brother chose. But I put my foot down and refused. Today they mellowed down and now they respect my decisions more, even if they don't approve very much."

"At least that…," He ends up shrugging, finishing cutting the onion and picking up the ginger. "My parents didn't care much about my choices. I got drafted on my school's wrestling team as soon as I started the school year, and that guaranteed me a shitload of opportunities, so they had nothing to complain about. It sucks that you didn't have that same support..."

"It's okay, I don't regret the choices I made," She guarantees, picking up a bottle that looked like sake, from a corner of the counter. "I love working as a cook, and the salary allows me to keep art as a hobby. I mean, as far as acceptable, it's not enough for me to buy the best materials there is, but it's something."

"In that case I'm happy for you, haha… and I swear I wasn't snooping aroung there, I just saw the canvases!," He swears, a bit agitated. "I just paid attention to the photos…"

"Oh yes, those photos…," She takes the board with the chopped onions that he held out to her, starting to brown them in the frying pan. "They were supposed to be displayed in the living room, or at least in my bedroom. But there, in my crafts room, they give me inspiration and motivation. And they remind me of how things have changed since then."

"Hehe, and how they changed… I learned a lot of new things about you just by looking at those photos," He comments, calmer now that he made sure she wasn’t offended by his accidental snooping. "I didn’t know that you dyed your hair. It's not a criticism at all, this color looks great on you."

"Huh?," She stops in the act of pouring a trickle of sake into the frying pan, staring at him confused. "But I didn't. This is my natural color."

"Uh... wait, really?," It's his turn to be confused. "But I saw some pothos from your school days, and your hair was straight and black..."

"Ooh…," She nods slowly, embarrassed. "Got it. But yeah... that was my dyed, straightened hair," She explains, smiling, embarrassed by his surprise. "My school was the strict type, very inflexible with its rules. And I needed to suit the standards."

"Damn, man…," He shakes his head, indignant. "Are you serious that there are schools that still do these things? That's messed up... but wait," He frowns. "There was a friend of yours in those photos giving the biggest gyaru vibes, with her tanned skin, bleached hair and all. Didn't the school forbid that too?"

"Ooh, are you talking about Akane?," Tomori lets out a vengeful laugh. "They did, but she didn't give a fuck. They threatened her with suspension and even expulsion several times, but the threats never went ahead. She was well connected and the school board was scared shitless of her dad and his 'friends', hahaha!"

"Holy shit, I don't even want to ask… but Akane? Isn't that your friend whose number Rihito wants so bad?," Okubo's eyes widen. "Boy, he really doesn't know what he's getting himself into..."

"I told you, didn't I?," She smiles devilishly. "Anyway, she's been my best friend since high school. I was hanging out with her even before I met Kanny and Hiro. She went through a delinquent phase along with me. We used to terrorize that school. Good times, hehehe..."

"Damn, you weren't joking about that delinquent phase, eh. I've got your number," He laughs, disbelieved. "But I don't have any room to judge, as I did the same thing. I just didn't expect this to be one of the many things we have in common, haha."

Tomori lowers her head a little, eyes fixed as she tends to the frying pan where the onions are browning. She then dips the pork strips into the spiced mixture, stirring vigorously, the flames fanned by the cooking sake, which Okubo is a little nervous about. He even takes a step back.

"H-Hey, sorry, I promise I won't meddle anymore, you don't have to try to intimidate me with pyromania techniques, hahaha...!"

"What- no, that's not it," She shakes her head quickly, taking the frying pan away from the heat. "I'm not mad, I'm just…," She hesitates a little, looking up at him shyly. "I'm just wondering if it changes something for you. In the way you see me, I mean..."

This makes Okubo relax, though not completely. His expression softens as he moves closer again, his expression a little more serene.

"I already said it don't. Again, this is you, isn't it? It's just that I was really curious about what you told me just now... about the things I said in that documentary getting you through that phase," He scratches the back of his head, sort of forgetting that his hands were full of onion bits. "Was that time so complicated for you? For you to think that talking more about it will make me think less of you..."

She sighs a little, closing her eyes briefly. She turns her attention back to the frying pan, and for a second, Okubo thought she was going to ignore him and signal with her silence that the subject was closed. That is until she starts talking.

"It's complicated because, now that I think back, it seems so ridiculous and childish… although at fifteen or sixteen, you're expected to be ridiculous and childish," She gives a humorless laugh "Remember I said I had other aspirations? So... when I was younger, I wanted to become a professional fighter."

"What? Seriously?," He leans towards her, his eyes widening even more. "And why didn't this dream of yours go ahead? I remember that I asked you that day at the market why you didn't learn some martial art..."

"Yeah, you asked. And I couldn't answer you," She nods. "The truth is that I tried to learn, in the last year of middle school. You know how much I am passionate about martial arts, it runs in the family and comes from way back, when I was a little girl... so I decided that I wanted to be part of this world that I loved so much. I begged and begged my parents until they agreed to let me practice judo at a dojo that accepted women. The girls in my class were about my age, and I was super excited. I thought I was going to make a bunch of friends, that I was going to become a judoka like no other, that my fighting career was going to take off... until the third class, where I gave up, bawling my eyes out because my shoulders were killing me after being thrown mercilessly onto the mat by the other girls during practice.

"... Oh," Okubo hisses a little through clenched teeth, sounding pious. "Yeah, judo is no joke, whether for guys or gals. But you could’ve tried with another style, like jiu-jitsu. It's actually a well-recommended martial art for women.

"I know, but my bad experience on that first attempt kinda broke my spirit. The truth is, Naoya, I'm a freaking coward. I hate getting hurt and feeling pain. I hate getting beaten," She gives a mortified smile. "Which is kinda absurd, considering I was always getting into fights in high school. I think anger was a tremendous fuel."

"You're not a coward! Holy shit, how can someone who faced a whole gang of brats like you did be a coward?," He protests indignantly. She shakes her head.

"Having a survival instinct is not the same as being brave. And thinking that I wasn't brave enough to live that childhood dream of mine saddened me to the point of making me go down a bad pathç She turns her head to the side, unable to hold his gaze. "That and several other factors, such as the demands from my parents, my envy of my brother who was a model student and the star of his high school baseball club, how they saw me as inadequate because of things that weren't my fault, like the color and texture of my hair. .. all of this kind of threw me into a self-destructive spiral. I skipped classes, hung out with people who were no good, got into fights... the worst of them was when I fought with another girl over a boy, can you believe it?," She makes a face, the corners of her mouth quivering in a clear attempt to hold back laughter. "We were both liking the same guy, and you know how teenagers are… holy shit, it was a hell of a catfight! I even hit her in the face with a baseball bat, I almost got expelled from school afterwards, hahaha!

"Holy fuck, woman...," Okubo stares at her open-mouthed; the mental image that that brought was too surreal for him to be able to register properly. "I'm glad you weren't armed the night I pissed you off! You were going to leave me scarred for life, just like this girl must’ve been!"

"Yeah, now you know what I'm capable of," She says, half joking, half serious. "But relax, she's fine, and nowadays we're the best of friends. It's not just you fighters who make friends after beating each other up, see?," She made a V with the fingers of her free hand. "Anyway… that time was very difficult for me. I knew that my parents were worried and disappointed, I knew that my fame was spreading, that if I continued like that my life would be over, but I didn't have the heart to try to change, to improve... until I watched your interview, in that documentary."

She finishes frying the meat, turning off the heat and turning to face him. Okubo feels a strange shiver run up his spine at the sight of her intense expression, the glint in her eyes that almost made them look teary, the slight flush that colored her cheeks. Something small flapped against the wall of his stomach.

"You spoke about your belief that race has no influence on a person's ability to be good at something with so much conviction! You said you were good and would prove it to the whole world, and so many people doubted you. So many people accused you of being arrogant, of being a loudmouth with a giant ego, there were even some westerners being racist pieces of shit on the forums. And none of that shook you, none of that stopped you from going out there and proving them all wrong," She clenches her fists against her chest, her voice getting louder, heated, passionate. "It was your dedication, pure and simple, that got you where no other Japanese has gone. You told all those idiots to shut up and watch you fly, and you did! I could only remember everyone telling me that I was a disappointment, a troublemaker, that I was never going to amount to anything in life... and that's when I found the strength to do like you and prove that all of them were wrong about me. I could grow up, be someone, fly like you did! And if I couldn't be a fighter... then I was going to show all my love and admiration for the martial arts by supporting fighters with all my might,  cheering with every victory, taking that energy you exude and using it to chase after dreams I knew I could achieve. And that's why I love everything that involves the world of martial arts. Because this world gave me the strength to fight for myself, even if not in the same way that you do."

She stops talking at last, breathing a little hard, taking in his dumbfounded expression. And then she turns very red, playing with her fingers shyly while giggling in embarrassment.

"Ahaha, I'm sorry, I talked much! When I get excited about something, it's hard to shut up..."

But she didn't didn't know that, for Okubo, it was okay. Because the last thing he wanted was for her to shut up.

He remembered when he first met her, how sweet and adorable he found her, a delicate flower that seemed to be the kind of woman he always wanted as an arm candy; a pretty thing for him to display at press conferences as one of his trophies. A time that felt like it was ages ago instead of just over two months ago. And two months was enough to find out how wrong he was about her. And how glad he was that he was wrong.

She said how his words, spoken in that documentary, had swept her away. But she had no idea how enraptured he felt by her at that moment, by the intense passion in her voice, in her convictions, how he wanted her to keep talking because he loved that iron strength behind all the silk, loved the bravery she doubted she possessed, loved how she managed to be fierce without losing her sweetness, loved everything about her, he loved her...

... Oh. Ooh, shit. He was fucked, wasn't he? Holy crap...

... And at the same time it felt so obvious and so, so wonderful to be fucked like that, because of her. How could it not be? As he looked at her face flushed with embarrassment, the hue not fading even as she rattled on, he couldn't think of anyone who was easier to love.

He never had the slightest chance to resist it, right from the start. And for the first time since becoming a professional fighter, with a name and a reputation to uphold, he didn't feel the slightest urge to resist, either. Falling in love with her was easy, it felt good, and he wouldn't try to fight that feeling.

He just didn't know if it was mutual. And how was he going to explain to Rihito, Himuro and Kaneda that this was no longer a simple attempt to get a laid, which was no longer his priority. Damn...

“…you always say you like to hear me talk about the things I'm passionate about, but everyone has a limit on how much litany they can take. And I'm going to think I've found yours if you don't answer me now," She kept whimpering, mortified, and that wakes him up from his daydreams. "Come on, don't make me feel more embarrassed than I already am…!"

"… Why are you embarrassed?," He asks finally, surprising himself by managing to speak in a casual tone, instead of a dazzled one. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about. You're amazing, you know that?"

She stops chattering, blinking, mouth half open. "M-Me?"

"Is there anyone else here besides us? Damn...," He laughs low, approaching and reaching out to gently touch her face. "And you say you're a scared crybaby... you have to have a shitload of courage to recognize limitations and do what you can with them, you know? I'm very happy to have been an inspiration to you, but the willpower to change your life came entirely from you, ok? Don't take away your own merits, miss."

"Oh...," Her eyes twinkle again, in that way that made her look like she was about to cry. She moistens her lips with her tongue, the corners of them curling upwards. "I'm- I'm not… it's just that I was very frustrated for not being able to carry out that dream of mine, and that's not exactly amazing..."

"It is for me, because you didn't lose that passion within yourself, even with those frustrations. It just gave you another purpose, and now you fight in your own way, every day, one batch of cookies at a time," He jokes, to which she laughs. "Congratulations, Uta Tomori. You managed to turn your idol into your fan."

She bites her bottom lip, seeming to be vibrating with happiness as she touches his hands, which were still caressing her face. Sh close her eyes.

“Hearing you say that is almost like a dream come true, you know? But in my old fantasies, I heard it with the fervent admiration of a fan..."

"And now? How do you hear it?"

She opens her eyes, fluttering her lashes a little before turning her face to the side and kissing his left palm.

“I hear it like someone who really, really wants to kiss you right now."

And he doesn't hesitate, bending down to reach her mouth. He was going to have back pain at that rate, but doing that to her was definitely worth a few physical therapy sessions.

They finish making ginger pork and then they eat it (it was delicious, like everything else she made, dammit, he was one lucky son of a bitch!), talking little between one strip of fried meat and another. But it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. It was cozy. He, a chatterbox who couldn't keep his mouth shut for more than five minutes, was perfectly content enjoying this silence with her.

After dinner, she invited him to sprawl out on the sofa in the living room with her while they searched the Netflix catalog for an interesting movie. He was relieved that she hadn't suggested they go upstairs; he definitely wouldn't be abe to get in the mood for that night. But he still had that urge to be close to her, which was also unheard of.

Being like this with a girl, curled up on a couch with no perverted thoughts crossing his mind, just enjoying the warmth of the moment… holy shit, if that wasn't love, he didn't know what else could be.

"Hnnn… today has been a busy day…," She murmurs low, her eyes a little heavy as they are fixed on the television, her head snuggled into his chest as he lazily rubs her back. "And kinda emotional too. Sorry for being tired..."

He understood what those words implied without her needing to elaborate. "Sorry I'm too tired to do things that are more physical and involve less clothing with you." And surprisingly, that relieved him.

"It's fine, Tomori. I'm kinda tired too, the week was busy. I just want to be with you, that's all."

She smiles, closing her eyes "Me too. Then, if you feel like it, I'll show you the rest of the house."

"Fine be me. I'm especially curious about your crafts room. By the way, I wanted to ask..."

"What?"

"Will I ever be able to see you painting?"

She pouts, looking to the side while blushing a little. "Do you really want to? It's pretty boring from the outside."

"Not if I'm your model. How about it, huh?," He raises and lowers his eyebrows playfully. "I'll bring you a bouquet of roses just to pose with one of them between my teeth."

She laughs, pushing his face to the side. "No, I'll be laughing like an idiot and I won't be able to concentrate, hahaha!"

"Laughing at your idol like that, right on his face? And she still calls herself my fan, hunf..."

"I'm your fan, but not blind about it anymore," She lifts her chin a little. And then she smiles, stealing a peck from him. "And you prefer it that way, don't lie."

Oh yes, he sure did. He could never do those things with a blind, fanatical Tomori. She wouldn't have thought herself worthy. And he wouldn't have known her so well to want to go through all that with her. If he hadn't wanted to get to know her better...

Yeah, curiosity killed the gorilla, indeed. And thank God it did.

NEXT CHAPTER

[nene-san49]

Sunday Anime Line Up

Man yesterday was killer. Because of how much spring cleaning I did on Sat, I slept till I had to work on Sunday so I didn't watch any anime until I got out of work, but I went to my friends house to be her private chef so I was not near my computer either to post when I was done.😩

So instead of posting this yesterday I'm doing it today but I will have another post for Monday Anime right after it so stay tuned!😉

Tu Bian Ying Xiong X

So I'm not going to lie. I knew who the villain was before the reveal from the one scene but the whole moment was killed for me when i found out that Firm Man's boots were so firm that he could not bend at the knees and that bathroom scene had me crying laughing.😂

Uma Musume: Cinderella Grey

I kind of knew the end of the race cause it was too soon but when we saw those kicks I understood even more. It was nice to see at least one of the three bullies back off now, the red head of course, and in full tsundere mode which I am here for always.🤭

Lazarus

From Jerry to Jill and Baklava from grandma this was an interesting episode and I loved watching Axel destroy the guy trying to scam him. Still using an axe to get a watch is a little over the top don't ya think?😖

Kanchigai no Atelier Meister

I can understand why they can't tell Kurt that he is OP as fuck cause he really would not believe them since he compares himself to the others from his home village. Its kind of sad honestly but at the same time it is really funny watching them convince him of what they can and it takes like two hours.😄

Gorilla no Kami kara Kagosareta Reijou wa Ouritsu Kishi-dan de Kawaigarareru

Is it terrible to say I really like Arcient? He is clearly a shitty guy but the way he said that Sophia was his prey just gave me the shivers. This should not surprise anyone who knows who my avatar is.😏

Kakushite! Makina-san!! / Chotto Dake ai ga Omoi Dark Elf ga Isekai Kara Oikakete Kita

So these are two short form anime, about 12 min with OP/ED, that fall into the ecchi category that I am enjoying like after dinner mints or a fun size candy bar at the end of my anime watching day. Really nothing else just some guilty pleasure ecchi comedy.😁

[crispylilworm]

FINALLY finished Cyberpunk 2077 main storyline, and I can definitively say that it's one of my top if not my absolute favorite game of all time. I know I'm super lucky that I first played after then major 2.0 update so I am not harboring any hate about the initial release because I was simply not there lol. I beg you to give it a chance if you walked away the first time.

The world building, the story, the detail, the humor, the heart - literally everything about it was so cool and so immersive. Normally I just play games and make decisions in the moment, but I loved planning out my build and testing out the best weapons and mods. I got so into the roleplay aspect of it too, finding myself thinking "V wouldn't say that" even if I wanted to see where a choice led - if anything it made me super excited to do new playthroughs choosing different paths.

I waited to do Phantom Liberty until I was at the "point of no return" in the main game plot, so the past few weeks have been me just going through the most insane and fun missions straight through the end of the game. I'm a bit of a sidequest-Sally but I personally enjoyed rolling up to all the fights way overpowered because I did the legwork to make it happen lol. Next time I'm excited to challenge myself and just focus on main missions and better fight strategy.

My first playthrough was like 120 hours and I did Streetkid origin, Netrunner/Edgerunner build, romanced Judy, and went for the whole hometown hero/rebel path with my choices. My next playthrough I am 100% planning a Corpo run with a melee build - TBD if I run away to the Nomads (and Panam lol) or go full evil Corpo bootlicker, so I'll have to see how that plays out.

I was maxed out Cyberdecks with RAM and had the best Quickhacks, there was nothing more satisfying than blowing up enemies with my mind (T5 System Collapse being non-traceable is actually broken OP) or using different distractions and baits to manipulate NPCs how I wanted. I had the Oracle optics to see enemies around walls and plan out my stealth attack accordingly. However, failing to stealth and ending up in combat was never disappointing - I had high Reflexes with my Int/Tech build so I could still air dash to an enemy to meet them with my shotgun or Gorilla Arms. All the options were so incredibly creative and fun, it's no wonder I was obsessed with sidequests.

Spoilers below for the rest of my monologue:

The endings I got first playthrough:

Main: The Sun

PL: King of Wands

The Sun: This ending felt so right for my V carrying on the shared dream with Jackie on that failed mission to become a legend of Night City. I finished most of the side character storylines, include all the Johnny missions, so it made sense to end it with Rogue. I felt bad getting her killed, but I had the feeling she had accepted that fate going into the mission - the same way Johnny came to terms with his situation and gave himself up for V in the end. I like to think V goes on to make Johnny proud, wherever his engram is in Mikoshi or beyond the black wall with Alt

King of Wands: I knew that my V would always support fellow Netrunner So Mi in my playthrough, but having to kill Reed made me very upset. He was giving me no choice! I actually immediately savescummed to try another option and then Reed shot V so I felt less bad returning to the original playthrough lol. I loved how there were no "right" choices in the DLC but man my heart

I'm the type to play it through by heart and then research the rest of the options anyway to see how it could have turned out. I have like 20 save files at critical choices/cool scenes so I can replay or try something different next time.

Apparently I'm primed to get the secret ending? I now know you need at least 70% with Johnny and need to wait like 5 minutes on the ending rooftop dialogue scene. I had 85% with Johnny - how could I disagree with him, the rockstar-terrorist Keanu Reeves in V's brain? I thought it was funny how forums were all asking for advice how to get to the requisite stats but I just simped for Johnny the whole time so I guess I achieved that easily lol. He was morally aligned with exactly where I wanted to take V, so now I just need to replay that dialogue seen and see where it goes. I actually have no idea what the secret ending entails I just now it exists

Some things I did not enjoy or didn't get in to:

Sandevistan: I think this is the coolest combat feature in the game but I simply did not use it in my first-playthrough build. It's the main inspiration for me wanting to do melee next time

Beat on the Brat: I simply was not in to becoming a boxing star. Even when I do a replay, I am not convinced I would give it a try sorry <3

Vehicle combat: I'm not actually sure how much of this was a 2.0 update, but I didn't feel compelled/did not have the build to really even try it out. I've seen some videos of people using swords on motorcycles so hopefully I'll try that next playthrough

River romance: I liked the mission with his sidequest but I HATED that you had to sit through cringe romance scenes with him. V and River had zero chemistry, it was actually so uncomfortable to have to sit through some of that "flirty" dialogue to get it done

The Badlands: I skipped a most of the missions here solely because it mad no sense for my Streetkid/Netrunner V to be gallivanting around out here. I loved a lot of characters out here but wanted to save it for a next playthrough

Vehicle contracts: If I started PL earlier in my playthrough, maybe I'd go for it. I just had no desire to go for them

I'm still in the phase of listening to lore/easter egg videos on Youtube and the content still feels endless. Using quick-travel options literally feels dirty, there's so much to find just driving around or exploring on foot. I don't think I'll every delete this first playthrough even, when I go through replays, just because there's so much I keep and keep uncovering. Night City definitely makes me want to check out Witcher Wild Hunt or anything else CD Project RED puts out because I love what they were able to put out with cyberpunk

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

@zepskies

Karl Urban and Bruce Willis' fight to Back In the Saddle is literally everything to me! It lives rent free forever in my head! But I will forever be disappointed that Karl Urban didn't come back for the second movie 😭

You should watch Knight and Day if you haven't seen it. It's like Red but with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz and it's an action Rom-com.

Also you're spoiling me with all of these wonderful reviews 🥰💗

Ahh the "hear me out" thing is so relatable lmao. But Marlin?! Really?! 🤣🤣

It really is the best thing to do with your friends 🤣 My friend group has a chat where all we do is send photos of our "hear me out" characters lol.

Oh God, you're giving me Vietnam War-level flashbacks to undergrad when I was stuck until 12 am at the library working on essays and shiz. 🫠

I'm sorry, but man it's so relatable. I was up for hours studying for physics tests that I never understood. I hated Physics... I mean I know it's real and that it exists, but I don't need to know why things work the way they do. They work and I believe it, that's it 🤣

GIRL PLSSS. 💀💀💀 Not "daddy gorilla." 🤣

🤣 I had to do it LMAO! I'm ashamed 🫣

Okay, lmfao. I'ma need you to stop calling me out like this. 😂😂

Its funny because I was one million percent calling myself out with this. Girl, you had no idea how many romance novels I read lol, but I love the use of the "You're out of order gif" so much 🤣

But I so love the description of Russell -- he's a man in a sea of man-boys our age, and there's a distinct difference. 😏

Amen 🙌🏻 That's why we like men in their 40's, because they're experienced and they actually know how to treat a woman. 😉

LMFAO. Reading this snippet in context is of course even better. I'm dying but also she would so be me in this situation. 😝

Thank you sweetie 😘 Yeah, I wanted to make her a little bit more realistic and not as confident or practiced lol. She's literally me whenever an attractive man talks to me. 😭

OMG YESSSSS. Lmfao Rain was beautiful! And I love that you referenced one of my favorite movies. 😆😆 Totally agree that Nala had bedroom eyes. And I raise you Robin Hood from the Disney movie! They did NOT have to draw him that sexy.

Dory is a horsegirlie and I will make Russell the cute older brother that had to endure her obsession! But I might have also been thinking about cowboy Dean and your follow up series Outlander. I'm so excited to jump back into that world!

Oh my word Robin Hood is peak disney animation- they had no business making a fox that sexy 🤣. And he was GOOD WITH KIDS and a GOOD PERSON! Robin Hood walked so Nick Wilde could run in Zootopia and that is the hill I will die on!

Miss ma'am!! Don't make me bring out the Out of Order gif again! I had to fan myself when he literally caught her hand. Dear Lord. 🫠 Also, the way I was so shocked and literally laughed out loud at the way she headbutted him. 🤣 Honestly that would probably be me trying to flirt. A+ casting 😂👌🏽 But again, that spice and the way he kissed her melted me like the Wicked Witch of the West. ❤️‍🔥

The man is too smooth 😉 I'm going to be honest the original draft didn't have the headbutt, but then her kissing Russell like that seemed too easy for her and she needed to be more awkward lol. I needed her to embarrass herself and I wanted to suffer from second hand embarrassment lol

"A+ casting" ☠️🤣 LOL

Thank you! Russell is really working her, but he's also making her feel comfortable with her awkwardness lol

lmaooo sage advice! 😂

Kay is the Gandalf of this fic 😂. She's trying to steer the reader in the right direction and support her!

LOL I love her inner monologue. She's so adorkable, but I'm already getting the RED vibes omggg. 🙏🏽

Thank you friend! She is very "adorkable." And yay! I'm glad you're picking up the RED vibes. Of all the Jensen Characters I felt like Russell fit the best for that kind of situation.

It's the little things I love loll. 🤌🏽

Oh goodness thank you! Yeah, Russell protecting her head while she fell is so him and I love him so much for that.

Not me feeling sorry for him right now when she's well within her right to try and beat him with a pink baseball bat. 🤣🤣🤣

She is one million percent within her right to beat him senseless, but I also felt bad for him too. He really isn't a murderer (well... maybe) but he was attacked!

I was smiling so hard while reading the rest of this. I was actually so disappointed to get to the end! This was one helluva meet cute, hun. 💜 The thing about your one-shots is that they feel like the start of a series--of an amazing adventure that's about to start. I know you have probably a million WIPs at this point lol, but this does feel like a RED kind of movie and I would love to see more of these two if you ever feel so inspired. ✨

Yay! I'm happy it made you smile Alex! It really is one crazy meet cute lol

Girl stop, you're making me cry with these compliments 😭💕 I do have about a million WIPS, but I really do love this reader and Russell too. And I would love to continue their story in the future, because I'm obsessed with RED. I might have to watch it again to plot out a series with these two 😉

I Can Explain!

Pairing: Russell Shaw x f!reader, Reader POV

Prompt: "How Do You Know Where I Live?"

Requested by: @vixaaa

Summary:  When you meet a gorgeous green-eyed stranger at a bar and agree to go home with him, everything goes off the rails and you're strapped in for the ride.

Tropes: Awkward Rom-Com? Forced Proximity? Protective Russell.

Word Count: 10.6 K (But You'll Laugh The Whole Time)

Warnings: An Unhinged Game of "Hear Me Out," References to Sex, Sexual innuendo, Little bit of self-deprecating thought (reader), Reader is kinda awkward and clumsy, Gunfire, Weapons, Talk of Murder, Shooting?, Brief Description of Torture, Brief Description of Murder, Terror, Fear, Cursing, Kissing, I think that's everything? I promise this one is a rom-com despite all the warnings. 😅

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is no use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.

Main Masterlist

Prompt Celebration Masterlist

A/N: Hey guys! This is another wonderful prompt request that I got for my prompt celebration from the enchanting @vixaaa! This one is based a little bit on the movies "Knight and Day" and "RED." If you've never seen either of those, go and watch them right now. They are some of my favorites!

P.S: Yes, this is the one I've been writing that has just been making me wheeze/cackle laugh the whole time I wrote it...

“Alright, hear me out… Gil, the angelfish from Finding Nemo. There is no way in hell he was made for kids.” Your friend Liza says wobbling slightly on the plush leather bench seat of the booth before taking a shot of vodka. Her peacock blue No. 2 hair shimmers like a beacon in the dimly lit bar. 

“That’s low hanging fruit.” Kay snorts from your left while leaning heavily into your shoulder, the smell of her vanilla perfume wafting up with the movement. “That scar? The tragic backstory? And voiced by Wilem Defoe? Sign me up.”

You giggle into the shot glass clasped in your hand before you knock it back, face scrunching at the taste and pleasant burn.

The “Hear Me Out” drinking game your two best friends proposed to clear your head from the nuclear level bombing of an exam you just took in your Physics One class, had been successful so far. You couldn’t remember any of the questions from the test that made you scream obscenities into the strawberry shaped pillows on the couch in your living room earlier. Exactly where the two of them had found you when they got back to your shared apartment at the end of the day.

The live music in the crowded bar thrummed through your veins and the shots were giving you just the right amount of buzz to feel more carefree than you had in the past week. The week that you’d spent approximately one million hours studying for the test and trying to memorize all the formulas that looked exactly the same. 

Four times you’d fallen asleep on your computer and had the imprint of the keyboard on your cheek, three times you’d had a mental breakdown and decided to change your major promising yourself that you were sure you could make it doing freelance whatever the fuck sounded good at that moment, and you couldn’t count the number of times that you’d gone to the library to study only to get distracted by whatever else was better than studying for a physics test.

Spoiler alert, there are a lot of things that are.

But you knew you were screwed the second you saw the first question and the rest of them had only been the final nails in the coffin that was the dream of getting an “A” in the class before the semester was over. 

The glimmering sheen of hope at the end of the semester you once had, was ebbing to a dim lantern being swung by a lighthouse keeper in a hurricane, hence the large tray of vodka sitting prettily on the water ringed table in front of you.

You were sure to regret every single shot, but your next exam was two days away and you didn’t want to think about it yet, not when the shadow of the last was poking you in the back with a pencil like someone looking for your final piece of gum.

For a Tuesday night, Duke’s, the bar the three of you frequented so often that the rotating circle of bartenders knew you all by name, was crowded.

There was the familiar glow of the neon signs posted on every wall, a new band performing a set on the small stage in the corner, a collection of screaming girls in the front row of the crowd snapping photos and drooling over the base player, a group of frat guys shouting obscenities at a tv blasting a football game, and a few patrons trying to unwind from a long day while nursing multi colored drinks and sitting sporadically around the crowded bar while the bartender of the hour leaned against the counter and tried to hear orders people shouted over the din. 

You would have been more than happy to spend the evening on the couch eating a greasy pizza and drinking margaritas back at the apartment, but Kay and Liza refused to let you rot on the couch. 

The three of you had been inseparable since freshman year when you’d been assigned as roommates together. Liza was an art major hoping to illustrate book covers one day, Kay was a hardworking pre-med student, and you were… undecided. Physics 1 had been the idea of your advisor, who after a year of trying to get you to declare a major was close to throwing in the towel, you believed that he was using Physics 1 as a form of payback for driving him almost to the point of early retirement. 

“Okay, okay I see you.” Kay giggles, before grabbing a fresh shot. Her long black hair is pulled back from her face with a claw clip, but a few pieces bob around her head with the movement of her head to the music. “And I raise you Kerchak from Tarzan!”

“The daddy gorilla?” Liza asks, leaning into her fiance, Matt, where he lounges back against the faded maroon leather beside her. 

There was a half full glass of beer sitting in front of him, one he’d ordered when he found out what everyone else at your table was drinking. But he’d been a good sport so far despite all of his suggestions to the game being so obvious there was no reason for him to defend his choice and the rest of you mocking him endlessly for it. 

“Sweetie, he could be my daddy any day of the week.” Kay winks and throws back her shot. 

“You’re disgusting.” Liza rolls her eyes, refusing to take a shot to agree with Kay. 

“Hey! What happened to ‘we listen and we don’t judge?’” You interrupt, putting your arm around Kay who holds up a middle finger in answer to Liza’s taunt.

“Where was that when I said Jessica Rabbit two turns ago?” Matt grouses from his side of the table, crossing his large arms over his chest. His blond hair had tumbled out of the bun at the back of his neck to cover the grass stain on the collar of his jersey. He’d come straight from practice when Liza called. 

And then Kay and you had to suffer through the long make out session the two of them had when they reunited as if they’d been separated by war for fifty years and not two hours. They were recently engaged and you loved Matt, which is why you’d let them make out for exactly thirty seconds before Kay and you started making exaggerated gagging noises while they kissed. 

Kay’s boyfriend hadn’t been able to get out of work, but Kay was going to walk to the coffee shop inside the library to pick him up when the tray of shots in the center of the table sat empty. Usually you’d worry about that sort of thing, your friend walking alone on campus at night, but because Kay had the highest tolerance out of all of you, Matt included, and a total badass who welcomed the challenge of anyone who tried to test her, you were willing to let it slide. 

That and the three of you tracked each other’s location with your phones.

“Because Jessica Rabbit isn’t a hear me out! Everyone knows that she’s super sexy!” You argue. “She doesn’t fit the criteria of this game!”

“She’s right babe.” Liza says, squeezing his arm with a sympathetic smile. “But it’s okay. I love that you’re a basic bitch.”

“But she’s animated!” Matt exclaims, obviously confused.

“So? Flynn Ryder is animated and he’s every woman’s dream.” You shrug, picking up a glass to take your turn.

You begin to shuffle through the mental file folder you have on characters who possessed “the energy” that made them so attractive. Truthfully, Kay and Liza had already said most of the ones you were thinking.

“You want to talk about every woman’s dream?” Kay smirks, her eyes flick over to the bar. “Check out green eyes over there. Holy shit, I’d let him rock me like a hurricane all day and all night!” 

“I’ll be sure to tell Sean, your boyfriend of three years-” You begin to say, but Kay pinches your cheeks between her fingers and turns your head so you can see who she’s talking about. 

Oh.

The stranger sitting at the bar is everything she suggested and more. He’s the kind of handsome that didn’t exist outside of the stack of communal romance novels that sat on the bookshelf in your living room and served as the perfect reminder of how single you were. 

The man is taller and broader than any of the so-called boys you went to class with each day, his tight fitting dark t-shirt pulling up over muscular arms that rippled with taunt muscles and were decorated with smoky tattoos curling beneath the ink colored sleeves. His chocolate colored hair is long and pushed back over his head, but a few strands hang forward to frame a well defined jaw covered in a thick dusting of facial hair.

Your throat suddenly gets very tight. 

The man’s gaze is focused on you, the green of his eyes brilliant, crinkled just around the edges with his smile. He winks and your entire face takes on the identity of a strawberry with your flush.

“Holy shit!” Kay nudges you. “You have to go over there.”

“What?” You squeak. “Are you insane? That guy is-”

“The kind of man who would make you forget all about that physics test?” Liza raises an eyebrow.

“The kind of man who would break the laws of physics with you all night long?” Kay adds. “Babe, come on, it's been months for you. Why don’t you go over there and say hi?”

“No way.” You shake your head vehemently, hyperventilating a little bit at the thought of going up to a complete stranger. 

You were not the confident girl in the group that did that. Kay was. It was exactly how she had met her boyfriend Sean three years ago, by using a cheesy pick up line that made him snort so hard he had beer coming out of his nose. Liza wasn’t much better. She’d met Matt in this very bar when her heel broke and she stumbled into where he was sitting with his friends at the bar. 

And the truth was it had been a few months since the last relationship (if you could call it that) fizzled out… and with both of your friends in relationships you often were the awkward fifth wheel. It wasn’t that you didn’t like your friends' boyfriends, Matt and Sean were great and they always did their best to make you feel comfortable whenever you were out with everyone, but you were kinda tired of being the spare tire.

“I don’t think we should be encouraging her to go off somewhere with a random man from a bar that she just met.” Matt says with a frown. 

Matt often held the braincell in your friend group and was the one who was more focused on making sure that everyone was safe. He was the one who followed up with a text whenever someone left to go home, the one who made sure that everyone stayed together when you were out late, and was usually the designated driver. 

“You’re such a hypocrite.” Liza boops Matt on the nose. “You were a random man that I’d never met before. And if I’m not mistaken we met in this very bar.”

“That’s different.” Matt sighs, but he leans towards Liza, the tension dissipating from his shoulders as he looks at her and his frown slips into a smile. 

They were one of those couples that no one ever thought would work. Liza was the carefree art major with no plan in the world and Matt was the All American, blue-eyed, blond haired football player that everyone said was “going to do great things” when in reality all Matt wanted to be was Liza’s husband. He didn’t care about anything else, but making her happy. Hence the giant engagement ring on her finger, the same one that he’d let her design because he knew that was important to her. 

They were everything you wanted in your own relationship. A beautiful merging of crazy (from you) with someone stable and structured, preferably someone with a strong jaw, brilliant green eyes and-

Great, he’s already invaded my subconscious. 

You glance up again to see if the stranger is still looking. He is, but this time his smile is just a little wider, and you watch his eyes drag down the length of your body for a moment appreciatively before flicking back up to yours and catches you doing the same thing. 

You weren’t wearing anything revealing, in fact, you hadn’t bothered dressing up to go out because you didn’t feel like it. You were still wearing the blank sweatpants and oversized sweatshirt combo that you’d worn to your exam. 

When you caught him looking at you, it made you regret you hadn’t worn something more eye-catching.

“Come on, that guy is checking you out! Go over there.” Kay nudges you, jostling the forgotten tequila shot in your hand. 

“He looks like trouble.” Matt says half-heartedly, but he’s too busy staring into Liza’s eyes to really care. Her hands are entwined at the back of his head pulling his forehead down to hers.

When it got to that point of the night, it usually meant that the two of them were about fifteen seconds from calling it an early night and going back to Matt’s apartment. Technically Kay would probably end up there as well because Sean was now Matt’s roommate and that meant you’d have the apartment to yourself…

“How can you tell? Are you looking at his reflection in Liza’s eyes?” Kay takes a shot from the collection of the remaining few in front of her.

“We all know that if Sean was here, you’d already be practicing your scuba breathing.” Liza gently brushes back the few strands of blond hair that hang forward into Matt’s face which only makes him sigh softly and look at her like she’s the last woman on earth. 

You try not to be jealous. 

Kay only rolls her eyes. “Alright, I’m taking initiative.”

“What does that mean?” You begin to ask, but Kay shoves you out of the booth and towards the handsome stranger who hasn’t taken his eyes off of you since your eyes met moments ago. 

“Kay. What the hell?” You turn back to look at her, but she’s already holding up your forgotten shot. 

“Take this and go over there.”

“But-”

“The only butt you should be thinking about is his, in those deliciously tight jeans. You will thank me in the morning.” She refuses to budge. “And then come home and tell me everything the two of you did, because Sean’s about to go visit his family for a week and I will need something to fantasize about.”

You wrinkle your nose in disgust, but then look to Liza hoping for help. Unfortunately she’s too busy counting Matt’s eyelashes to defend you. You look back at Kay who is still holding up the shot, gaze unwavering. 

I can’t believe I’m about to do this. 

You think to yourself with a sigh, before taking the shot, hoping that it will give you some of the confidence you need to talk to the most attractive man you’d ever seen in your life. 

I can do this, I can do this-

The internal monologue repeats itself over and over again with each step as you weave your way through the crowd to make it where the man is sitting, dropping your gaze to the people around you as if you’re more focused on them.

You weren’t, but staring at him while you were walking towards him seemed too predatory, and you could already feel how warm your cheeks were from your flush.

You grip the firm edge of the bar when you make it to him, using it to ground yourself there in the moment before you find the strength to meet his gaze.

There’s a faded green jacket hung over the high backed barstool behind him that you hadn’t noticed before.

Your eyes trace over his body, just a quick glance, but snags on his arms for just a second too long to be casual. They were even more glorious in person, tan and flecked with cinnamon colored freckles hidden beneath twisting tattoos that disappeared into his dark shirt sleeves.

“Hi.” You smile shyly at the man when you meet his gaze.

“Hi.” He rumbles with an easy smile while the green of his eyes flashes in the neon sign hanging behind the bar.

His voice catches you off guard. You weren't expecting it to be so smooth, silk over your skin, but also like the rough drag of the ocean against sand as it pulls it out to sea.

“Hi.” You say again as all other thoughts evaporate from you mind and you fight the urge to facepalm. 

What the hell am I doing over here? I might as well do the walk of shame back to my own table. 

Russell raises an eyebrow, his smile widening. “Hi.” He echoes.

You open your mouth-

“Before you say hi back sweetheart, why don’t you tell me what you’re drinking instead?” He winks making your cheeks warm with their flush.

Honestly, you were expecting him to be turned off by your somewhat awkward introduction, but if you bothered him, he doesn’t show it. He leans towards you curiously, eyes drinking you in. 

You clear your throat while your mind scrambles to come up with something appropriate or sexy to say other than ‘wow you’re pretty.’ You settle on. “Whatever you’re drinking.” 

Smooth real smooth. 

You glance back in the direction of where your friends are sitting as the man’s gaze turns to the bartender so he can order you a drink. Kay makes an obscene gesture with her hand that makes Matt kick her under the table, and Liza gives you an encouraging thumbs up.

Kill me now. 

You turn back to the man lounging against the bar, unaware that he’s watching you again. 

“You seemed like you were having some fun over there. What were you talking about?” He nods his head in the direction of your friends, the motion causing more of his dark hair to fall into his eyes and you fight the urge to push it back from his face and find out if it was as soft as it looked.

“Oh um.” Your mouth goes dry. The last thing you wanted to say to the gorgeous man was that your friends and you were discussing what animated movie characters turned you on. So you blurt out. “The First Law of Thermodynamics.”

It had clawed its way from the dark recesses of your mind where the rest of the test answers had been hiding from you when you tried to summon them earlier. 

“What?” The man laughs while you feel your face begin to blaze. 

“The First Law of Thermodynamics?” You clear your throat. “The theory that energy cannot be created or destroyed."

Where was that when I needed it for the test?

“Huh.” He smirks and takes a long sip from the beer in his hand. “Didn’t think Tarzan had anything to do with that.”

Oh sweet baby potatoes he heard the daddy conversation. Why couldn’t he have heard the Jessica Rabbit conversation instead?

“Ah.” You laugh awkwardly, realizing exactly what he overheard. 

The bartender puts down a bottle of beer in front of you and whirls away to another patron sitting on the opposite side of the bar. The band begins to play a new song, this one louder with more drums than the last one, causing the man to lean closer to you so you can hear him. 

“So.” The smell of the man’s cologne wafts over you. He smells like pine, mint, whiskey, and there’s an odd smell you can’t place, something that smells almost a little bit like smoke.

You ascribe it to cigarettes, but you don’t realize how wrong you are. 

There’s something about him, more than just how attractive he is or how good he smells that draws you in. Maybe you’d just been burned by far too many boys and were blinded by the man sitting in front of you, but he had a roughness and self-sufficient air that you found refreshing. 

He was assertive, sexy, with smoldering green eyes that somehow seemed soft and hard at the same time and filled you with an unholy amount of desire. 

“So?” You parrot, bringing the beer up to your lips, hoping that a sip will take the edge off. 

“Don’t you want to hear mine?” His voice is low and sultry, breath warming the air between the two of your faces. 

You sputter out a cough, choking on the sip you took in surprise, and his eyes widen in concern.The man brings his hand down against your back with a hearty smack to clear out your lungs.

“Are you okay?” 

“Never better.” You choke out, voice a little wheezy. “Wrong pipe.”

This is quickly becoming the most embarrassing moment of my life. 

“Are you sure?” The stranger’s eyes trace over you as if he fears you’ll start asphyxiating at any moment.

“Mhmm.” You clear your throat again. “What were you saying?”

“I asked if you wanted to hear mine.”

You suddenly forget how to breathe, the only thing grounding you to this moment is the hand you placed on the cherry wood of the bar. “Sure.”

“Rain.”

Despite the last few seconds of you feeling so awkward it made you want to sink into the floor like quicksand and the fact that your throat is still burning from when the beer went down the wrong pipe, your mouth quirks up in a smile. “The horse from Spirit?”

“Mhmm.” He smiles a little wider. “My little sister used to watch that movie non-stop, and there was always something about that horse.”

“Huh.” You muse taking another sip of the beer, this time successfully not choking on it. “I didn’t peg you for a horse guy. You seem more like a Nala person.”

“Oh that lion did it for me too.” The man leans closer to you and you can feel your knees getting weak. “She definitely had bedroom eyes.”

“She did!” You laugh at him. “The animators knew what they were doing.”

It was getting easier to talk to him now and you could feel your nerves slowly going out to sea. There’s a comfortable silence that fills the air between the two of you.

“Why did you say the First Law of Thermodynamics earlier?” He asks before taking a sip from his beer. The condensation trickles down the side of the glass to pool against the wood of the bar.

“Because I didn’t want to admit what we were talking about.” You answer honestly. “And I guess it’s still a little fresh in my mind-”

“Why?”

“I had a physics test today. Completely bombed it. That’s why my friends brought me out tonight, they were trying to make me forget it.” You wave a hand dismissively, but it was the first time you’d thought about the test in the past hour and it still stung a little bit. 

You were hoping that by this point of the night it wouldn’t have mattered anymore, but it did. Not to mention you didn’t exactly want to be talking about your most recent failure with a man who looked anything like he did. 

But something about him made you feel comfortable talking to him about things that were not on the pre-approved list of subjects you created when you spoke to people you were attracted to. He didn’t seem to just be some hot stranger in a bar, he seemed like he actually cared, and that he was invested in what you were going to say. 

It made him even more attractive. You weren't used to boys wanting to actually listen to anything you had to say.

“I’m sorry.” His face pulls down into a sympathetic frown. 

“Me too.” You sigh. 

“Maybe you didn’t do as bad as you think you did.”

“Oh I did. When I turned in the test, the professor made a face.” Your thumb rubs against the glass of the cold bottle clutched in your hand. “I studied all week for it and it kinda feels like I wasted all that time.”

The man studies you for a moment. “I think that if you learn something from it, then it’s not a waste. There are no accidents.“

“Are you purposely quoting Master Oogway to make me feel better or is that just a coincidence?” 

“He’s a smart turtle.” He laughs pleased with himself that he made you smile. “But you remembered the First Law of Thermodynamics. And I thought it was a nice pick up line. Might use that sometime.” 

“Shut up.” You laugh and raise your hand to hit him on the shoulder, but he catches it with his.

The contact of the rough palm of his hand in yours makes electricity zing through your body, bringing a wave of heat coursing behind it. 

“That’s not very nice. Keep trying to hit me like that and I might have to take you to court, Sweetheart.” He winks.

“Oh please-” 

“How else am I going to run into you again?”

“Well-” You swallow trying to find the next words, but they’re stuck in the back of your throat. 

I am so out of practice. 

“Well?” He raises an eyebrow in a silent challenge, the end of his perfect mouth teased upwards in a smile. 

“This doesn’t have to be goodbye.”

“What did you have in mind?” The heat of his gaze sends goosebumps dancing over your skin and you swear you can feel your heartbeat in the base of your throat. 

People do this all the time. I can say it. I can-

“Maybe-” You scoot closer to him, summoning some courage from the tequila. “Something like this.” 

Your free hand curls into the front of his shirt to pull the stranger closer for a kiss.

Unfortunately, you pull him just a little too hard, with a little too much enthusiasm, and he falls off the stool with a startled cry in surprise and knocks his head into yours. 

“Ow.” You groan rubbing at the red mark forming on your forehead. “I am so sorry.” 

By now your cheeks are so warm that you could fry an egg on them and you were sure you looked like a giant raspberry. You had never been so clumsy or so embarrassed in your entire life. 

“It’s okay, you just surprised me a bit.” The man says, but he’s peering at the mark on your forehead. “Are you okay?” 

How many times is he going to ask me that tonight? 

“Yeah the only thing that’s hurt is my pride.” You let out an awkward laugh. “I’m just gonna-“ You gesture with your thumb over your shoulder to signify that you’re going to leave. 

The anecdotes that your friends were going to tell from tonight had already begun to manifest in your head:

“Hey, remember that time you tried to flirt with a gorgeous man at the bar and you headbutted him?”

“Hey, remember that handsome stranger? The one you told all about your failed physics test instead of sleeping with him?”

“Wait.” He gently puts his hand on your waist, sending your heart into a gallop. “Can we try that again?”

“Huh?” You blink in surprise.

So far all you’d done was head butt him and tell him your sob story about failing your physics test. 

Worst seduction technique ever. 

“Don’t move.” He smiles. “Don’t want to have to take you to the hospital for a CT if you bump my head again.” 

It would have made you laugh if he wasn’t already kissing you.

It might just be the alcohol talking, or the fact that the last thing you kissed was the strawberry pillows on the couch in the living room last week when Liza, Kay, and you were watching your favorite paranormal tv show and you were imagining the male lead, but this kiss is nothing like any of the others you’d had in the past. 

His mouth devours yours, beard scratching against your cheeks in a way that makes your entire body buzz. The man’s hands tighten your waist to draw you closer, closing the space between your bodies, and all you can feel is the wonderful drag of his fingertips against the end of your sweatshirt, the burn of his beard, the press of his chest onto yours, and the tangle of his tongue as you sink further into him. 

A moan vibrates up through his chest and into your mouth that you echo with a soft sigh, your hands slipping over the taunt muscles before finding purchase against his back, your fingertips curling into the soft fabric of his t-shirt. 

The rest of the bar is rendered to a dull throb of life at the back of your mind, the man in front of you absorbing the rest of your attention as he should. He is nothing like anyone you’d ever met and you wanted to know more. You wanted to see the end of the odd shaped scar just at the base of his throat, trail your fingers over the dark tattoos that decorated his skin while searching for more in places you couldn’t yet see, and sink into the deep green sea of his eyes. 

“Better?” He breathes.

“Much, but if you’re not into that, I also know the Second Law of Thermodynamics. Just to give you something to remember me by.” You mumble against his lips, still slightly embarrassed. Your hands were still curled behind his strong shoulders, fingertips digging into the firm muscles.

“Beside the bruises?” He smirks before he kisses you again, the languid roll of his tongue against yours makes you forget your own name. “I’d very much like to hear it.” The rumble of his words vibrates through where your bodies are pressed against one another. “But first let me get the car and then I’ll let you tell me all about it.” 

He brushes his lips to yours one more time, before he puts cash on the bar, and leaves you breathless as he saunters away towards the front door. 

Holy fucking shit. How did that work?

“Girl Yes!” You hear Kay, before you feel her hands come down on your shoulders to shake you excitedly. “I was a little worried in the middle there for you with that head butt, but yes! That’s how you do it!” Her excited squeal brings you back down to earth from the cloud you were floating on with Russell. 

“Where’d he go?” Liza asks. Matt was holding her from behind, his chin on her shoulder as he slowly rocked her to the music.

“To get the car.” Your cheeks flush at the insinuation. 

“Fuck I am so jealous. The only thing I’m going to get to do tonight is Sean’s back.” Kay gives an exaggerated sigh. “It’s acting up and that means I’m going to have to give him a massage for an hour and not the good kind. It always knocks him out.” 

“Aww babe.” Liza says. 

“It’s okay.” Kay shrugs, but then sends her a saucy wink. “I can do some laundry. His washing machine has this spin cycle that makes me see stars.” 

“I didn’t need to know that you’ve been molesting our washing machine.” Matt closes his eyes as if trying to scrub the image from his mind. 

“It’s money well spent, Mattie.” Kay batts her eyes at him. 

He huffs, but then turns his gaze on you, his blue eyes are filled with concern. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay?”

“Yeah.” You shrug, nerves popping and sizzling inside so much that they might as well be giving off enough electricity to power New York City. “I don’t get a creepy vibe from him. I think he’s actually kind of nice.” 

It was true. Your radar was usually on point with things like this, and there was something about Russell that didn’t scream axe murderer. He seemed surprisingly laid back and honest, and you found yourself curious to know more about him. 

Matt doesn’t look convinced.

“It’s okay babe.” Liza says, swaying her and his body to the music. “We have the app on our phones and we all know the safe word.” She continues, referencing the word the three of you designated when everything was okay as well as the other word that meant everything was going terribly wrong. 

You didn’t think that you would need it. 

He sighs. “Fine, but if he tries anything weird-”

“What qualifies as weird for you?” Kay asks, raising an eyebrow. “I’ve always been curious about your kinks.” 

Kay always took pride in getting under Matt’s skin. You never knew why that was, only that it seemed to be her mission to make him crack. He never did. 

“Be safe.” He nods at you before he drags Liza towards the door. 

“Seriously babe.” Kay begins to back away. “Be safe. Because the last thing you want to pass right now is a pregnancy test.” 

“Why are we friends again?” You groan as you follow behind her, weaving through the mass of bodies writhing to the newest song. 

The air outside the bar is cooler, but there’s just a hint of something on the wind. Spring was coming, but it was still far enough away to leave just a light chill in the air. The street in front of Duke’s was populated sporadically with cars of varying shapes and colors, but you couldn’t help but wonder what kind of car the mysterious stranger drove. 

Why didn’t I ask him for his name? 

“Because you’d be lost without me.” Kay laughs at you, but then pulls you into a hug. “Have fun and please try not to think about that stupid test. You’re so smart and I promise that one test is not going to define your entire future. If that were true my first organic chemistry test would have come with a refrigerator box to live in, because that test was literally the stuff of nightmares.” 

She frowns at the memory. It was the first test that she had ever failed in her entire life, and although you were the one who usually obsessed over grades, it was the first time you’d ever seen Kay so disappointed. That was also because her professor had asked her to stop by for office hours and told her that there was no way she’d ever be able to get the grades she needed in his class. 

But a weekend marathon of Sex and the City listening to her mentor Samantha Jones, had brought her back to life and she’d sauntered confidently into the classroom armed with a flat white latte and sat in the front row at every lecture the rest of the semester. 

She’d gotten the highest grade in the class. 

Basically, Kay was your hero, that was the real reason why you were her friend. 

“I’ll try my best. Tell Sean hi for me.” You squeeze her just as tight, before she walks away down the darkened path back to campus where Sean would be waiting for her. 

There was an odd glow over the sidewalks tonight, a yellowed light that crawled along the cracked brick building that housed Duke’s and halted just shy of the opening of the alley that ran between Duke’s and the bank next door. No other people were visible. Even the small crowd that usually leaned against the rustic brick wall outside of the bar smoking was nowhere to be seen. 

It was odd.

You rub your hands down your arms with nervous anticipation. You’d slept with someone from a bar one time before, but one night stands were not your forte at all. The last time it’d happened, you’d gone back with a guy to his apartment only to find out an hour later when his girlfriend got home that he wasn’t single. She hadn’t seemed surprised that you were in bed with him, but you had been when she pulled out a switchblade the size of your hand and began to slash through the neatly arranged collection of plush squish-mallows on the floor while screaming obscenities at the guy.

In hindsight, maybe the squish-mallows were a clue that he was in a relationship. 

But you didn’t have any bad feelings about the man you’d met. He was attractive, witty, nice, funny, and he genuinely seemed concerned about you when you almost choked to death on a sip of beer. 

I will make him forget the entire awkward encounter. 

You promised yourself, but you also began to be a little bit nervous. You didn’t know why it was taking him so long to find the car. 

A bird caws overhead, sweeping low across the buildings, feathers an inky black in the night air, its shadow flickering across the moon. 

Another two minutes pass and you start to get antsy. 

Maybe he just left?

The thought brings a wave of disappointment over you. The stranger was the first person in a long time that you’d felt genuinely attracted to and now you couldn’t help but think that maybe he lied and when he said he was going to get the car, he really was trying to get away from you as fast as possible. 

You take a few steps in the direction that Kay left thinking that you might as well cut your losses and see if you can catch up, but hesitate. 

What if I leave and he comes back? What if-

An odd noise that sounds like a cat hacking up a hairball comes from the alley directly to your right, followed by the sound of something heavy hitting the pavement. 

You turn. Most of the alley is obscured in shadows, several large dumpsters jut out from grimy brick walls stained with God knows what, but you don’t see anything out of the ordinary. 

There are some lights fastened to the wall that runs the length of the bar, sending a dingy orange light over the bags of trash, empty flattened cardboard boxes, and plastic cups strewn over the wet ground. 

The door of Duke’s swings open for a moment, bringing the sounds and smells of the bar through the doorway as a woman enters tugging a sullen looking man behind her.

You turn your attention back to the empty alleyway, and catch the low rumble of a voice that sounds oddly familiar. It echoes through the darkness bouncing off the stone, metal, and bags of trash to where you stand at the dimly lit mouth of the alley.

That’s weird. 

Another sound follows the voice, a wet sounding thud that piques your interest. You take a tentative step forward into the darkness.

Wait. Isn’t this how every horror movie starts?

It was a valid question. But then you hear the voice again, it’s louder, vibrating against the brick and mortar, and it pulls your forward. 

Anxiety hums through your body as you inch down the alley, sticking to the well lit side that runs the length of Duke’s.

“Who sent you?” The familiar voice asks.

There’s no answer, and the sound of the cat choking up a hairball comes back. 

Someone needs to get Grizabella a glass of water.

You take another shaky step passing by the first dumpster before you reach the part of the alley that wraps around the back of the bar. 

At first you’re not sure what you see. The part of the alley behind the bar is more of a cramped street with a tire marked dirt path, bathed in awkward light from the moon and from a lazy streetlight that’s only half lit. There’s another dumpster back here, this one a little larger than the others you’d seen along the side of the building, but that isn’t what’s interesting. 

The image comes into focus. 

The stranger from the bar is standing there, his back to you, but he isn’t alone. The stranger has a man pinned to the dumpster, a large knife stabbed into the space between the man’s collarbone and his right shoulder while his other hand is clasped tightly around the man’s neck.

“Who sent you?!” The stranger roars, the knife digging into the man’s shoulder. 

Your entire body freezes in fear.

My radar was so wrong. How could it be this wrong? He was so caring and kind- That’s what they said about Ted Bundy. 

Your gaze drops to what you thought was a garbage bag at the green-eyed stranger's feet, but realize that it’s not a bag, it’s a body.

Holy shit he’s a murderer! Maybe if I just back away slowly-

You take a slow step backwards hoping to edge back into the alley that runs the length of the bar and forget this night ever happened, but instead of your foot finding solid ground, it finds a forgotten potato chip bag. 

The crinkled plastic crunches underfoot, breaking the still silence of the night. You inhale sharply and look up. Your gaze locks with the green-eyed man.

“I didn’t see anything.” You hold up your hands, backing away slowly. “Have a nice night.”

“Wait-”

“Nope.” You turn and flee down the alley hoping that someone is coming out of the bar at the exact moment who can witness the broad stranger chasing after you. His boots thud against the concrete, splashing through water in hot pursuit, contrasting against the plods of your own feet sloshing through puddles and through trash to get back to the light.

Before you make it halfway through the darkness, he grabs your arm and turns you to look at him. 

“Let me go!” You shriek, tugging at his grip, preparing to kick him between his legs, the only place that matters.

“Please wait. I can explain!” 

“You don’t have to explain!” You keep pulling at his arm. “I didn’t see anything! I don’t know who you are. And you know what? I wasn’t even in the bar tonight! I was back in my apartment watching Crime Scene Kitchen!” 

It was the first thing that popped into your head, but if it meant that you got to live, it would be your alibi.

He hesitates confused. “What’s Crime Scene Kitchen?”

“What? You just fucking murdered someone in an alley, you’re about to murder me, and that’s what you’re asking me?” You scream.

“I’m not going to murder you. And I was the one who was attacked!”

“Oh sure!” Fear clamps down hard on your throat squeezing the air coming in through your lungs. Tears begin to burn against your eyes as you try to release his grip. “Somebody help me!” You scream loudly trying to twist away from him and wishing that you’d brought your bottle of pepper spray or that you’d taken the self-defense class last summer with Kay or at least paid more attention to that scene in Miss Congeniality.

How could I have been so stupid? He’s going to kill me here and I’ll never know what that physics test did to my GPA. 

You frown slightly at that thought. It really is weird what goes through your head when you think you’re going to die. 

“Please, let me explain.” He says again, eyes wide and filled with an emotion that looks surprisingly like regret.

His dark hair has fallen forward over his cheeks that are flecked with blood, but the lights that line the wall of the dark alley perfectly frame his face. He looked like a model for a beer commercial or one that they’d roughed up a little for those weird perfume commercials you saw that never made any sense, but were always intriguing. 

Why are all the hot ones crazy? Why couldn’t he have just been a bad kisser? Or maybe a little too loud? Why is his flaw that he freaking MURDERS people? 

As you think that, there is a little voice inside your head that asks: Could I be okay with that? 

NO! OF COURSE NOT!

“There’s nothing to explain! You’re a murderer! You just killed those people!” You aim a kick at his crotch, but the man only catches your ankle with his large hand. You could feel the warmth of his skin through your sweatpants, the sensation that brought warm tingles through your body when you were in the bar, only sends a wave of fear crashing over you.

“Yes I did, but for a good reason!”

“Really? What reason was that!?”

“They were trying to kill me!”

“I don’t believe you!”

“I-”

Before he can finish his sentence, gunfire explodes over your head. Sparks fly as bullets crash into the dumpsters and rip through the night air around where you and the man are standing.

There’s a large black suburban parked in the street that runs behind Duke’s where you’re found the stranger with the body. Three men stand in front of it all in dark clothing and each one is  holding a pistol pointed directly at where you’re standing. 

“Holy shit!” You scream, but the stranger tackles you back behind the large rusting green dumpster that juts out and gives you cover from the blaze of bullets.

His body lays over yours, curving protectively around you, and his arm is behind you head so when you hit the ground, your head doesn’t. The impact of the cold, wet, concrete beneath your body jostles through your system, but you can’t focus on it too much, not when the man’s entire body is laying on top of yours and it feels as if he was made especially for you. 

He lays in the cradle of your thighs, wonderfully broad and hard, the muscles of his body contrasting to the soft curves of your body underneath your clothes. It left very little to the imagination, well… not little. 

It’s enough to make a girl forget that he’s a murderer… No, what am I saying!!

You shove him off of you and cower back behind the dumpster, the sound of gunfire filling your ears and making you realize exactly what you smelled on the man earlier that you thought was smoke. 

“Baby-” He says reaching out to comfort you.

“Don’t touch me! I’m not your baby!” You swat his hands away from you pressing yourself back into the wet wall of the alley. 

The smell of mold and trash was rising all around you in an unholy mist. The wet ground soaked into the soft fabric of your pants and left stains that you didn’t want to think about what they were. 

“Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit-” It comes out like a sickening mantra as you rock back and forth, hands on your ears to make the sound of the gunfire stop.

I’m going to die here. In this dismal back alley. In front of this gorgeous murder. If I had know that I wouldn’t have spent so much of this week studying for a mother-fucking physics test!

“Sweetheart!” The man shouts to catch your attention, but you don’t look at him. 

“What in the devil’s ass is happening?!” You shriek.

“Listen to me!” He shouts louder over the sound of gunfire and takes your cheeks in his rough palms to make him look at him. His green eyes are brilliant in the light, but filled with a determined fire that makes you suddenly feel very safe despite watching him kill someone and the active gunfire bouncing all around you. 

You wanted to trust him, but you also didn’t want to be on the news or used as a cautionary tale for mothers to guilt their daughters with. 

“I promise that nothing is going to happen to you.”

“How can you guarantee that?!”

“Because I don’t break my promises.” The determined grit in his eyes hardens as they sweep over your face. “I will explain what’s going on. But first I have to go talk to them.” He releases your face, but hesitates. 

The man wasn’t bothering to duck and cover, in fact each time a bullet ricocheted off the side of the dumpster he didn’t even flinch, meanwhile the sour taste of bile was rising into your mouth and you were sure that you were going to throw up. Panic was setting in, and your heart rate was getting dangerously high as anxiety and fear flickered along your nerve endings. 

Oh my sweet goodness he’s mentally unstable.

“Actually.” He sighs and flashes an awkward smile. “I don't want to lie to you. I’m going to go kill them. Don’t move.” He reaches into the waistband at the back of his worn jeans and pulls out a gun. 

Has he had that this whole time? HOW did I not feel it? 

“Wait what? Don’t go out there!” Your fingers fist in the front of his jacket, the fear of him leaving you more than the fear of him murdering you. At this point it was either be killed by the beautiful stranger or killed by the other guys, and being killed by the other guys meant that you’d have to meet someone new and look where that had gotten you tonight. 

“They’re not exactly going to leave on their own.” He cracks a smile despite the situation. “But promise me you’re not going to move.” His smile turns into a concerned frown, eyebrows furrowing together as his eyes settle on you once more, steely and unyielding. 

“I promise.” Your voice comes out shaky and not at all what you sound like. Truthfully you were surprised that you got anything to come out of your mouth that wasn't vomit.

He nods once. 

When he leaves, you wait exactly three seconds, counting each of them out in your head before you take off in a dead run for the front door of Duke’s bar and into the safety of the street beyond without looking back while hoping that all of this has just been a bad dream. 

Coming back to the apartment feels surreal, crossing through the living room like a Salvador Dali painting, and finally closing your bedroom door and locking it is like a mirage. 

You weren’t sure how you made it back here, only that you did, and that was all that mattered.

Kay and Liza weren’t home, predictably, but you would have tried to call both of them if you hadn’t dropped your phone in the cluster fuck that was everything that happened an hour ago. Because on top of everything now you didn’t have any way to contact your friends and let them know that you’re alive and okay.  

Your body was still buzzing with the anxiety of everything that happened, mind going a mile a minute the longer you allowed it to bathe in the memories of being shot at and watching the stranger kill those men. 

The stranger that somehow was able to trick your radar.

I just need to breathe, relax, and- 

You turn around towards your bed expecting to go to sleep and forget all of it, but the thought stutters to a halt as you realize you’re not alone. The green-eyed stranger is standing there in the center of your bedroom. He is holding a bundle of your clothes in one hand and your empty school backpack in the other. 

“What the fuck?!” You scream and reach for the Strawberry Shortcake bat your dad bought you when you moved out, hefting it high on your shoulder preparing to swing. “What the hell are you doing here?”

He raises an eyebrow at your awkward stance. “Why are you holding a bright pink baseball bat?”

“All the better beat the shit out of rapists who break into my apartment in the middle of the night!”

“What happened to murderer?” The end of his lips lift up in a smile too perfect to be real. He almost seems to be enjoying this, like he thinks you’re being cute and not accusing him of something terrible. 

“That too!”

He laughs at you, but then his smile slips into a frown.“Why did you break your promise?” You don't understand why he looks like a kicked puppy at the thought that you broke your promise. 

Of course I didn’t keep it! I was running for my life to get out of the way of the millions of bullets pointed at my head!

“What?”

“You promised that you would stay there and you didn’t. You could have been killed.” Worry flashes in his gaze, and your eyes drop to the flecks of blood on the outside of his jacket that remind you of everything this man had done tonight.

“Oh, well excuse me for breaking a promise I made to a murderer!” 

“I’m not a murderer.” 

“If the boot fits!” You snap back. “You showing up in my bedroom certainly seems plenty murdery. That and you going through my underwear drawer for a little souvenir.” Your eyes narrow in suspicion. 

“A souvenir?” The man laughs at you again, his shoulders shaking. He’s still wearing the same clothes he was in the alley, and again you’re momentarily stunned by how attractive he is.

“Why else would you be going through my drawers? And how do you know where I live!?”

“That’s not important right now.” The man shoves the bundle of your clothes into your backpack before moving back to the chest of drawers in the corner of your bedroom for another handful.

“What the fuck do you mean that’s not important right now? And what the hell are you doing?”

“I’m packing you a bag.”

“What? Why? So it’ll look like I ran away?!”

Oh holy fuck he’s still going to kill me!

You swing the bat as hard as you can, but the man raises the backpack to block your attack. 

“Calm down Derek Jeter! I’m not going to murder you, please stop saying that.”

“Why?”

He frowns and shrugs his shoulders. “Because it’s hurting my feelings a little bit.” 

“Hurting your-” You shake your head in disbelief. “Look, I have no idea who the fuck you are or why you broke into my apartment but-”

“Hi. I’m Russell.” The man now identified as ‘Russell’ holds out his hand to try and shake yours. 

That’s obviously a fake name. 

You stare at him blankly. “Are you insane?”

“No, I just told you, I’m  Russell. And we have to go.” He retracts his hand and begins to shove clothes into your backpack again.

“I’m not going anywhere with you, crazy! I have class in the morning and an exam in two days!” You heft the baseball bat higher on your shoulder as a silent threat.

Judging by the way he blocked your attack so easily a few moments ago, you didn’t have high hopes. But you did think that if you screamed loud enough your elderly neighbor, aptly named Willy due to the many, many times he’d flashed Kay, Liza, and you “accidentally,” would come over at least to see if you had any extra magazines to take back to his hoarder apartment that was stacked floor to ceiling with yellowed newspapers long out of print. 

Russell sighs, and looks from the bat to you, shoulders relaxing a millimeter, but there’s still something determined in his gaze. “I understand that you’re scared, but those guys, they saw you with me.”

“So?”

“So if I leave you here with no protection, they’re going to come here and take you.”

“You don’t know that!”

“Yes I do!” He replies, the edge of his voice is tinged with anger and frustration. 

“How?”

“Look!” Russell holds up a battered phone. Displayed on the cracked screen is a message thread of texts to an unknown number. Russell clicks on one of the pictures that was sent an hour ago, about the time the two of you met.

As it grows larger on the screen you recognize the two people in it. It’s a picture of Russell and you kissing at the bar. Your eyes are closed, hands curved over his shoulders possessively, while you smile into his mouth.

The memory of the kiss sends a warm tingle down your spine as you remember how good the kiss was. It was definitely in the top ten, hell, it was number one. 

Don’t be seduced by his charm and good looks! You saw him kill someone tonight! Not to mention he probably killed those other guys that were shooting at you.

Russell swipes his finger over the screen again, this time the picture is of him and you talking, your face on full display. You’re laughing at something Russell said with your right hand resting on the cool bottle of beer you never finished. Honestly, if anyone was seeing those photos for the first time it would look like Russell and you were together. 

“You took pictures of me!?” You shout. “You’re a fucking freak!” 

“Sweetheart, listen to me-”

“I’m not your Sweetheart. You’re just some random murder that I met at a bar!”

The things that I’ve said tonight for the first time could be an SNL skit. Why me?

“For the last time, I am not a murder! And I didn’t take those photos. The men who were after me did.”

“So? Why would they care about some random girl?”

“Because they don’t know you’re some random girl I met! They think that you’re important to me and until I figure out who they sent these pictures to, you’re not safe.”

“Can’t you text them and say that you just met me tonight? That it’s a pure coincidence?! That I’m not important to you.” You point at the cracked phone, waving your free hand frantically at it.

Russell laughs at your question. “Are you kidding? Do you think they’re going to believe me?”

“I don’t know! And how would they know where I live?”

“The same way I knew how.”

That is a good point. How did he know where I lived?

You hesitate, gaze flicking over where Russell stands with your backpack in his hand, but another idea begins to wiggle from the depths of your mind. “Wait. Is this some kind of kinky thing you do? Some fetish? Pretending to be a spy or that people are after you just to get yourself all hot and bothered?”

“What?” Now it’s Russell’s turn to look at you like you’re crazy. 

You take that as confirmation. “It is! Holy fuck, that is so messed up.”

Wow forget murderer, he’s an actual psychopath. Why the hell did I drop my phone?

Kay and Liza weren’t going to be back tonight. Especially not if they think that you took “Russell,” if that really is his name, back to the apartment. You had no other way of contacting them, except with your laptop that was sitting closed on your bed behind where Russell was standing. 

“Wait a minute. I’m not a spy.”

“Exactly, that’s the point! You’re pretending to make me-”

“No, I’m not. I promise all of this is real!” Russell sighs frustrated. “I know that you don’t want to believe me, but it isn’t safe here. And I can protect you!”

“That’s exactly what you would say to kidnap me!”

“Sweetheart. I am not going to kidnap you, I’m trying to keep you safe. I mean, if I have to kidnap you I will-”

Your eyes widen and you heft the bat high on your shoulder prepared to swing.

“Sorry, that was a bad joke.” He holds up his hands in surrender, flashing an apologetic smile. “What would it take to make you believe me?”

It was the question that you had been contemplating since he’d protected you in the alley. You knew nothing about him, didn’t know what he did for a living, and you’d only just learned his name. But despite everything that happened there was a little part of yourself that wanted to believe him. You wanted to believe everything he was telling you, well, not the part about you being in danger and the idea that people now wanted to kill you, but the part about being able to trust him. 

You think about the way he made you feel at the bar, when he listened to you complain about your physics test and made you laugh. You’d trusted him then, enough to go home with him or at least, try to go home with him. 

“I don’t know.” The bat slips a little bit from your shoulder with your honesty. “Do you have any character references?”

Russell cracks a smile. “Isn’t it a little early for you to ask me about my old girlfriends? Don’t think any of them would be willing to say anything good about me either.”

This time you can feel a little smile begin to tug at the end of your lips, one that Russell notices. 

“I know that you’re scared.” He takes a tentative step forward. “But I promise that I will explain everything to you, answer all your questions, but all I know is that you’re not safe here. And I can’t in good conscience leave, if I know you’re in danger.”

The look in his eyes had the determined fire you’d seen many times tonight, but there was something honest about it. They saw through you, and even though you had spent most of the night terrified and believed him to be a murderer, you didn’t think that someone like that would be so determined for you to go with him. 

It felt like two parts of your head were at war. You wanted to trust Russell, you didn’t think he was lying to you, but you had seen him kill those men. And there was an unfortunate part of you that worried he made all of this up to kidnap you. 

But I think if he meant to do that… he would have jumped me the minute I walked into my bedroom, he wouldn’t have said “hi.”

“I know this whole thing sounds crazy. But the last thing I want is for you to die because of something stupid I did. Please.”

You bite the inside of your cheek thinking about Kay and Liza. “If I leave, what about my roommates? They live here too.” 

He rubs the back of his neck. “I’m not going to sugar coat it Sweetheart, there’s always a chance that they’ll be hurt, but with you gone, there’s also a chance that these guys will focus more on finding me.”

“So basically you can’t guarantee their safety?”

“No.” He drops his gaze for a moment, but then he looks at you again. “But I can guarantee yours and I don’t want to take the chance with your life. And my brother is smart, maybe he can figure out a way to keep them safe too.”

You stand there for a moment contemplating what he’s saying, the memories of everything that happened tonight rising up in an unrelenting wave, not just cowering behind the dumpster, but the kiss the two of you shared, and the way he made you laugh.

I want to trust him. I don’t think he’s lying, I don’t think he’s going to hurt me. You think to yourself, and then the inevitable thought comes. I feel safe with him. 

“Do you promise that your name is Russell and that you’re telling me the truth?” You ask one more time to make sure.

“Yes.”

So you take a chance and hope to God that you’re not wrong. 

“Okay.” You nod, lowering the bat entirely. “I’ll go with you.”

He sighs in relief. “Good.” Russell holds out the backpack towards you. “You should probably pack this. If I had my way, there won’t be much in here besides underwear.”

“You’re such a guy.” You roll your eyes and take the backpack from him, but you can't help the smile that curls on the end of your mouth.

Russell returns it, pleased with himself that he'd gotten you to smile again. “That's better than you accusing me of being a murderer.”

“Jury’s still out on that one.” 

“But you have to admit… this did make you forget your physics test right?”

He's not wrong... but you don’t think that this is better.

A/N: I had so much fun with this one. I hope y'all laughed as much as I did 😂

Thank you so much for reading! Likes, Reblogs, and Comments are not required, but are always appreciated! I love hearing what y'all think! 😊 If you'd liked to be added to my taglist please let me know!

Taglist:

@roseblue373 @livya99 @mrsjenniferwinchester @zepskies @louisanalady

@yvonneeeee @kr804573 @waynes-multiverse

[viscerasmoothievents]

Recap of 2023/12/03

Woke up very late (~2pm) because I kept going back to sleep probably because my brain decided to try and protect me from the inevitable stress from the world pretty much collapsing in on itself, and my grandma got mad at me

Revised a character I made in Koikatsu Sunshine, and tried to make Franziska von Karma

Watched some of The Click and some other shit on Youtube

Rocked back and forth to half Jubyphonic's cover of "Dream" by Circus P

Then my grandma got mad at me for not taking a shower (This was ~10:30 PM) when she had reminded me before my rocking session

Then I decided to waste more time by opening up a few quizzes wondering if she was abusive (Guess who was getting upset? /rhetorical) which made her more angry

The I went to the bathroom because she threatened to take away my electronics if I didn't get in the shower before she got me some water

Then after washing my hands I sat on the bathroom floor, almost crying for a plethora of reasons

And finally I came out of the bathroom, asking her if I could try to take a shower the next day

She did ask what was wrong with me when I came out of the bathroom, but it was because I didn't take a shower despite being in there for about 30 minutes, not because I was upset.

I absolutely left shit out but oh well. Don't expect these to be all in one post btw, I'll probably write an initial post and then reblog it throughout the day, with these being reserved for when I forget to do that or stuff that happens while I'm at school (Don't bring my phone to school, and even if I did I'm not allowed to have it anywhere other than my locker, so that would be absolutely pointless).

Anyways here's a funny gif I have on my phone to add the illusion of more content:

ID for the gif: [Image of Donkey kong being zoomed in, with him blinking twice while it's zooming in]

Bold text:

Koikatsu Sunshine is an eroge game made by Illusion (Or whatever they call themselves now) with a 3d character creator element, implied for usage in CharaStudio or Story mode.

Franziska von Karma is a prosecutor from Ace Attorney, debuting in the second game, Justice for All, specifically case #2. She has silver-blue hair, white skin, grey eyes, and wears a black vest with two large blue diamond-shaped buttons, a white shirt with puffy sleeves and cuffs with two square(?) blue buttons, a tight black skirt, fishnet(?) stockings, and cuffed boots.

The Click is a YouTuber who voices over Reddit posts, going over subreddits such as r/Insane parents, r/Main Character syndrome, r/FacePalm, and r/NotLikeOtherGirls. He also occasionally streams on his YouTube channel, with those usually being for merch launches or games.

JubyPhonic is a music artist who's famous for English covers of songs like "Miss Wanna Die". The song I was vibing to, "Dream", is a cover of a vocaloid (Presumably, I've only listened to Juby's cover of it) song made by Circus P in collaboration with JubyPhonic (Don't quote me on that though, I'm 90% sure I got that from the comment section on her video)(Vibing refers to me rocking back and forth in the same chair I broke doing the same exact thing).

Donkey Kong is a character owned by Nintendo, first debuting in an arcade game also called Donkey Kong. He's a gorilla with brown fur and beige skin, along with a red tie with his initials, DK, inscribed in yellow (Inscribed basically means written btw). I'm too lazy to Google what his eye color is but from the gif I posted it looks like it's black so yeah.

This took me like an hour to write lmfao.

[lorecatchup]

Idk man, I'm starting to think Stardust doesn't actually fuck, not yet anyway?? but I'm pretty future Stardust definitely fucks, I wonder what the turning point is

He's like, very Cute and very Flirty (when he's not being feral and violent) but like, the only person he's ever really like that with is Goldust lmao and like, he's still got this kind of like, innocence about him??? Kind of like any horniness is accidental?? We haven't seen any like, Peak Stardust Horniness yet, like the "sexual" part of his whole "sexual and violent" thing hasn't /really/ come into play at all?? Like he's hinted at it some but like I said, it almost feels innocent idk idk I'm /very/ interested in what kicks off that side of him though 👀👀 who's out here bringing out the sluttiness in Stardust 👀👀 or it could literally just be Cody's influence lol idk

Like he was so shocked and like, almost offended when Goldust made that dudes love his ass joke and like, seemed kind of taken aback by Mark Henry grinding on him like, idk I don't think he fucks lmao I think he might just be a silly little guy who's slowly learning about human sexuality before our eyes

He is starting to get a little fruitier though lol

Which is a shame because I don't think Seth is seeing anyone rn and he's super fuckable atm and like, what a waste, he's got a hate thing going with Randy that's pretty horny but, I don't think he's getting any from anyone 😔

Literally lol like, I can see Seth calling/texting Cody in a moment of weakness (because he fully just thinks Stardust is just Cody in face paint) and getting Stardust instead and like, thinking 'idk maybe I'm desperate enough that I can work with this' but after a little bit of trying and getting literally nothing in return except for space facts and silliness, goofiness even and just being like, actually nvm

A Barbie moment of like "u up? come over" and getting a genuine "to do what? :)" in response

I do know Stardust learns what a handjob is at some point tho lmao

This Seth maybe 👀

Omfg, okay wait, the finger touch thing he does which can "impregnate people on Nebulon" he does it with Goldust and kids in the audience so it's not a sexual thing but in that one interview he did a few months ago where he does it with the guy interviewing him and because of the guy's response is like "you might be pregnat, I don't know, I don't know!" is it because he literally doesn't know lmao, like how human sexuality works lol because that's very cute

Creating life together being seperated from romance or sexuality on Nebulon is such an interesting idea

Like I know humans do that with doners and stuff but it's still intersting as like, the norm

[the-firebird69]

There are other things happening and I say that our son and daughter did a great job they saw the warning about the gorilla helping the others and his gorilla warfare and he thought about it for millisecond and shot it out to jet li and he did the work a while ago and he was giving the warning by the max and he picked up what it was and they're upset and they shouldn't be riding on themselves but they are part retard

Gu Oya

Yeah we see the problem we shouldn't tell anybody anything you're telling me it's doomed and stuff and his people and apparently it is a method that can be used on us effectively so I was stupid to do but we did it and it was us

The macs

There are things happening here and we're going to list them off and Shaw county

-people are assigned to do repairs on the roofs because they see it's raining and raining and raining and they have some leaks and it's going on this one has not leaked yet but they sort of fixed it put a bunch of holes in the roof but that's how it goes they have to remove it pretty soon

-there's a few other things happening the people who are doing the maintenance don't want to do it anymore and they said it these people don't appreciate it they don't like what we're doing and how we're doing it and it is half-assed we're too tired to do it I'm getting very old very easy and they told Stan that today this is standing there staring at me because I'm staring at him and he says I'll never back down he's singing code then he said this there's no reason he should he just keeps telling what I'm doing wrong and we don't want to do the job so Stan says come back here and we'll talk about it there's no use getting really angry and flipping out on everyone it's a show that takes a lot of energy my son said that stand why not save it for me so stay inside laughing I said by the time you get here you'll probably be charged up a little and he started laughing and said this is great he said the pot roast over there and also he says I haven't taken him there Josh darn it one of the things going to work well how many of us do we have to fight. So he's going to talk to him about it for real just gently and trying to work something out to get something done and it's kind of funny cuz they're trying to get it and now they're getting it I don't have the pot roast and stream the s*** out of me I have nowhere to live and it's going on now 30% success rate or less Stan is saying 20% or less and Jason and Jackie predict around 25% or less due to their stinking attitude they're approaching the target area now they haven't left yet so it trapped here soda soda and we have other things happening

-they're about 50,000 people on the way here now but they're going out to the first ring. It is 20 households and they are going to cause problems and it does look like they left yes and they didn't do anything really just secured the top a little made more holes it's kind of aggravating and it looks neater and it looks stupid these people that are going out to the first ring or wanted felons and the government here even the people here and put warrants on them and they are going to go after them today it's just a matter of time before they're put away and these 20 people are sought after every day and the people and they couldn't give a rat's ass and stuff like that and my son says I help make wooden ships that fly Right through The shield if you don't know what to do with it maybe you're doing the right thing and he said I don't understand what you're saying I said why is it Swahili he talked to some people and says very valuable to us we don't want you talking to him that way or harassing him because how does it get done then he says we don't do that for a while and he does something help and what you're doing is like this backlash he says you have to kind of let it ride and hope nobody gets hurt and he says I can't stand this anymore that's what it is he's trying to apologize you're kind of waved a little. He's walking by again and you're looking down so you got it. Is going out to the car and he sees Brad and says you're push to it and we can't stand you it's okay we cover I'm going to get him to do the job that hateful son of a b**** she's quite a liquor on TV people can't help it. You smiling said I wonder where she is now so I was chasing him around a little so watch out for Dan is making the bike so he ran after someone else oh yeah it's a different bike he said you son of a b****. So he sees what he's doing he says I can make mine work he goes out and gets the finest steal for the rear end and our son says it's cuz you want to be a hard ass and the clones want them and they're a bunch of freaking assholes and the Max and you can't get past them and they started laughing and said they can't do anything just sitting here paralyzed the whole place now they're just full of s***.. and that's what it is and diphtheria and other stuff. But things are happening here and they're putting out special warrants for people who are going to attack and that's the first ring and they're organizing people out there and they're going out there to the outskirts to arrest them and they have a teams out there now and their parent military police

More shortly

Thor Freya

Olympus

Zues Hera

[system-of-a-feather]

We never really had an issue with shaving (it also kind of itches our trichotillomania brain in a mostly-healthy way) but did find it a bit of a drag and even before the TranSaga we only really shaved when we felt like it, but these days with our gorilla legs and arms, slicking up and becoming clean shaven is honestly a lot more enjoyable.

Like honestly if you look at any of our "self portraits" most of us have long hair / longer hair and we used to be heavily protective of our hair before we butchered it off in the early TranSaga to help in the exploration and have kept it selectively short (mostly save for specific parts inherent in the style) since due to a combination of our trich brain making it hard to handle the middle stages and just because it we didn't have shit to weigh out our Gender TM

But honestly we are once again trying to over power the Trich brain so we can have that mane back.

It's honestly really kind of funny though when people who don't know how I see myself assume I'm this like, mohawk having hyper masculine biker man - cause very much no. I have breath in my aesthetic and style, but I'm a lot more leaning towards street fashion and dark / light (white) academia than I am straight up Biker Dude Bro.

PERSONALLY Sephiroth is top tier gender goals /hj

An ironic, wild, and paradoxical thing about transitioning for us and our brand of nonbinary is that the more I properly go transmasc the far far far more comfortable AND less resentful I am expressing femininity

Cause specifically in terms of nonbinary I unironically feel the best gender is "male bird" cause theyre extravagantly flamboyant, often smaller, have matching sex chromozomes (ZZ) but are still "male" - but in more human terms "femboy" and its honestly both fun and funny ngl

But shit also makes figuring out gender stuff annoying cause YES Im effeminate and ya know boobs and shit are probably neat sometimes but also HM

[amethysttribble]

The threatened Gintama x Kidnap Fam Crossover

None of you thought I was serious

Written with the intent that you can understand it without knowing Gintama, but who knows. Enjoy the Samurai vs. Aliens found family.

Elros is thirteen, and he is a samurai.

Or, well, at least he intends to be. One day. Those prospects aren’t looking so good, though.

He lives with his cousin, Gil-galad, in a run-down, empty dojo, working part-time just to keep the lights on and the debt-collectors away. He’d say things haven’t been good since their foster-father, Cirdan, died, but that wouldn’t be true. Things haven’t been good since the Amanto arrived, descending from the sky in their spaceships with their space weapons and their space ambitions.

Since the war that followed, that the samurai lost. Samurai like him and his family.

Since before Elros was born.

Gil remembered a little of the before-times, but he didn’t talk about them much. Memories of his parents were just as none existent as Elros’s memories of his, but Gil had something in his past that haunted his nightmares.

Cirdan could never really tell them where they came from either- or maybe he simply wouldn’t, Elros often thought bitterly these days. They were simply war orphans; unwanted, unneeded. 

So to was their way of life. Cirdan left them drowning in money problems when he died, brought on by keeping alive a dojo that no one would attend. Why would they?

Carrying a sword was illegal.

Frankly, the whole things a mess, and some days, Elros would like to lie down in a ditch and not get up. 

That was how he felt when the Amanto he was serving at work shoved him to the ground and spat on him. Stay down, don’t get up. What samurai pride did Elros have? He did not even have a sword.

And then Maglor stood up.

Maglor is a samurai

He is the son of a samurai, the brother of samurai, a student of a once much renowned school of samurai. 

After the invasion... after the war, that is a hard business to be in. It is made worse, Maglor must admit, by the blood on his hands and the role he played in that war. 

But that was long, long ago now. 

Now Maglor makes do by plucking his shamisen on street corners, and when that does not make do, he does odd jobs around the city. People have taken to calling him that: Odd Jobs.

He is not on the job now, he is eating at local restaurant where he likes the desert, and there’s a kid with an odd look about him who serves him.

The black-haired boy’s face seems a little too long, his skin a little too pale and... shiny. There is something about him that sets Maglor’s hair on end, makes him twitch towards his sword.

But the war- the war is over. And in their desperation, they had made mistakes with Amanto kids before. Maglor had to live with that now.

If this kid was some humanoid alien, or a halfie, or even just wore body glitter, that was not Maglor’s problem

The big, doggish Amanto in an embassy uniform who shoved that kid to the ground, though-

That shouldn’t be Maglor’s problem either, he was supposed to be keeping a low profile.

But the Amanto spat and the kid was near crying, and all Maglor could think of was fire and the face of his littlest brother as it all-

Frankly, it wasn’t Maglor’s fault he drew his wooden sword and cast the diplomat down. He was possessed. Had he not always been possessed, the Musical Manslayer?

If the wannabe samurai kid followed him out the door as he ran from the cops, that wasn’t his fault either.

Beating up the debt collectors and taking the kid off his over-worked cousin’s hands, though, that was definitely on Maglor.

Elrond is an Amanto, as they call them on Earth, but also the son of a samurai.

He hasn’t been on Earth very long. He only arrived recently, coming in search of his father. Papa had been gone for... years. A really long time. Since before Grandmother and Grandfather died, even.

Elrond wasn’t quite sure where to find him, but Earth seemed like a good place to start. 

The mother he’d never met might even be here.

It wasn’t hard to get to Earth, all he had to do was offer his services to a couple of human merchants. They were always looking for Amanto to use in dirty business, especially the kind Elrond was.

A Yato, even a half-one, even a child-one, was scary.

Elrond did not like fighting- and his cousin said that proved he was weak, that he really was just half- but it was so easy to beat up all the people he was told to, it was laughable.

Not killing them was the hard part.

It got him to Earth, though, and Elrond was free and clear!

At least he was right up until he realized he didn’t have any idea what to do to survive on earth.

That’s how he got mixed up with that gang. He didn’t mean to, really. It’s just that they had food and he was so hungry he felt like he could die. No where around here had enough food for a yato.

After he ate his fill, though, Elrond left. How could they stop him after all?

Guns, it turns out, hurt.

Motor bikes do not hurt, but when you have been shot, being run over by a wannabe samurai and his wannabe samurai apprentice also hurts.

They hide him, but Elrond thinks it’s mostly because they don’t want to be arrested for vehicular manslaughter

After he stops bleeding out and his eyes adjust in their little apartment, he realizes that might actually be because he looks... exactly like the samurai apprentice.

Except for the ears, really. Elrond has pointy Yato ears. ‘Elros’ has human ears.

But as Elrond struggles to sit up and looks at the Earth kid- a samurai like Papa, Papa was an earth samurai- some horrible suspicions started to creep up.

What was going on?

Maedhros is a joushishi. Some would call him a terrorist. Others a freedom-fighter. He prefers samurai.

His brother calls him delusional. Says the war is over, but Maedhros knows it’s not. It won’t be over until the Amanto cretins leave their lands and return what was stolen.

What Maglor has to say about Father and the cost of pursuing the silmarils be damned. 

Damn Caranthir too, on his massive amanto ship, off in space, seeking money and tools and other frivolous things. He abandoned them.

Damn Amras, where-ever he was, slipping quietly, unremarkably away, their phantom sixth brother.

Damn Curufin and Celegorm and their other revolutionary cell, their horrifically insane minions, their horrible ambitions and methods. 

Damn Arafinwe and his children and their Imperially sanctioned school, while theirs... while theirs was burned to the ground.

Damn all of them, really. Damn Fingon and his police dogs.

Maedhros hates them all now, hates how the war has twisted them insane or away from their goal, hates that he has been abandoned. He hates himself as well.

He knows he is a monster now, the Noble Youth of Madness as they named him. He’s comfortable with living like that.

He only goes crawling to Maglor because he’s not likely to make it back to base otherwise. It is a small mercy that his brother takes one look at him bleeding out on his mats and doesn't kick him out.

It’s a nightmare when Maglor scolds him for cursing while his side is stitched up with, “Don’t wake the children!”

“The WHAT-”

Maglor has two kids in his house, one a burgeoning samurai, one an Amanto, and they look weirdly similar. The boys are investigating something, themselves, but it is blindingly obvious there is something more going on.

“You’re mixing yourself up in something dangerous here,” Maedhros tell him, but Maglor doesn’t listen.

He never does.

It is only natural then, that he comes back every now and again to check in on his brother and the possible Amanto spy he is letting sleep in his living room.

Only natural he takes an interest in the education and training of a young samurai.

Only natural that he keeps well apprised of what the little Amanto is investigating, and maybe help that along a little, just to see where it leads.

And during all this, Maedhros, most assuredly, does not grow fond.