#I did do some actual research to make sure I had the dates right

[network-rail]

200 years of railroads apparently

So when I was waiting for the train today I noticed the departure boards saying that it was the 200th anniversary of the railway this year (I believe they’re going off of the Stockton and Darlington Railway, which was the first public railway to use steam engines and opened in 1825). Which is an important milestone in railway history for sure (although whether it counts as when railroads were invented is debatable) and there are definitely many things we can do to celebrate. To start, however, we can look back at these past 200 years of railroad history and some of the major milestones that occurred. Note that this will focus on British & American rail history since that's what I'm most familiar with. With that out of the way, here is a timeline of railway history:

c. 600 BCE: the ancient greeks moved some boats (water vehicles) over land on some rails

1769 CE: James Watt makes a better steam engine, which is why power is measured in watts and not newcomens.

1804 CE: Richard Trevithick makes a steam train but just as a fairground attraction (railways already exist but they use horses for power).

1825 CE: George Stephenson makes a steam train for the Stockton & Darlington Railway, which marks the beginning of the end for horses. In the coming years, millions of horses are sent to farms upstate, around the back of the shed, or off to work at the glue factory.

Steam trains: - faster and stronger than horses - are made of physics instead of biology (much neater & cleaner) - all of their waste goes into the air instead of the ground - you don't have to wait years for them to grow up

1830 CE: The Baltimore and Ohio Railroad (B&O) opens in the United States. While probably not the first railroad outside Britain to use steam trains, it is the first to do so in the United States, and since I don't really know much about, say, Belgian railway history it's the one we're going to be talking about.

1840s CE: Railroads form a crucial part of the US's westward expansion, bringing people and goods west (and east I suppose), along with letting the federal government outsource the genocide of the people who already lived there.

1863 CE: The Metropolitan Railway (eventually the Metropolitan Line) opens in central London, as the first urban rapid transit system. Since electric trains weren't a thing yet, this used steam trains. The smoke from the steam trains killed many people, most notably american President Abraham Lincoln when he visited in 1865.

1879 CE: Werner von Siemens makes an electric train but just as a fairground attraction (railways already exist but they use steam locomotives for power) (also there were prototype electric trains before this one but Siemens is the one with a unit named after him so he's who we care about)

c. 1880 CE: The Pennsylvania Railroad and London & North Western Railway become the largest corporations in the world. It's important to note that although railroads are one of humanity's greatest inventions, they did have the unfortunate side effect of also bringing about the dawn of modern capitalism, one of humanity's worst inventions.

1883 CE: The Volk's Electric Railway opens in Brighton. For a time, it included another line that went in the ocean (with rails on the sea floor and really long legs to keep passengers above the water) but this turned out to be a dumb idea and that part closed. The original Volk's Electric Railway is still open as the oldest operational electric railway, and you can go ride on it in the summer. I'll probably do this to celebrate at some point.

1890 CE: The City & South London Railway (later the Bank branch of the Northern Line) opens, finally providing an electric underground rapid transit system for the city and some much-needed relief from the smoke of steam trains. Unfortunately, this was too late to save Abraham Lincoln, who died from being shot in 1865.

1894 CE: a bunch of american southerners LARPing (but less cool than modern LARPers) as british aristocrats but even more racist (than the british aristocrats. all the LARPers I know personally aren't racist) form the Southern Railway. I mention it now because it'll be important later.

1895 CE: The Baltimore and Ohio Railroad opens the first mainline electric railroad. This doesn't mark the beginning of the end for steam power (although it should have) since most railways are privately owned, electrification costs money, and corporations hate spending money.

Electric trains: - faster and stronger than steam - don't require fuel at all - way quieter and don't create any local pollution (can go in tunnels!) - can be powered by renewables & nuclear, once they are invented (hydro is there from the start though) - can go both directions without needing to turn around - can form multiple units (better acceleration and don't need to move the engine around!) - very low maintenance (not constantly having a fire inside does tend to reduce wear and tear on parts) - generally very good

1912 CE: the first diesel locomotive enters service. This turns out to be what marks the end of steam, since diesels are better than steam but are cheaper (to set up. not to run) than electrics. In the coming years, millions of steam locomotives are sent to branch lines upstate, around the back of the depot, or off to work at the scrapyard.

Diesel trains: - faster than steam. except for normal, unmodified, in-service trains, since the fastest diesel is the Intercity 125 with a top speed of 201 km/hr while the steam powered Mallard reached a top speed of 203 km/hr. - stronger than steam. except they aren't, the most powerful diesel loco is weaker than several steam engines. - slower and weaker than electrics (unlike with steam engines, this isn't even close) - louder and more polluting than electrics (although not as bad as steam) - still require fuel (a different sort to steam locos though, and they don't need much water) - can go both directions without needing to turn around - can form multiple units - don't need overhead wires or third rail, which is the only reason they exist (they're mostly better than steam, and although they're worse than electrics they are cheaper. To set up. Not to run.)

1914 CE: The Milwaukee Road electrifies its Pacific Extension out in the american northwest, since steam trains couldn't go in tunnels and were too weak for the hills.

1917 CE: The United States of America nationalizes its railroads under the United States Railroad Administration, in order to put a stop to the private sector's incredible mismanagement of a vital public service during WWI.

1920 CE: After the war ends, the US hands the railroads back to the private companies. Just like all those other times the US did something really, really, good (i.e. Civil War Reconstruction, free school meals during Covid), the USRA didn't last very long and everything went right back to the terribleness of before.

1923 CE: Britain's railroads are grouped from lots of small (and some big) companies into four big companies: the London and North Eastern Railway (LNER), the Great Way Round Western Railway (GWR), the London, Midland, and Scottish Railway (LMS), and the Southern Railway (the real one, not the american south LARPers or modern-day corporate/french LARPers).

1920s CE: The Southern Railway (UK) electrifies much of its network with 750V DC third rail.

1938 CE: The LNER Class A4 "Mallard" sets the rail speed record, reaching 203 km/hr. This makes it the fastest steam train ever, especially since the Pennsylvania Railroad never discovered dynamometer cars or speedometers and had no idea how fast its trains were.

1948 CE: Britain's railroads are nationalized under British Railways (later British Rail).

1950s CE: Gas-turbine trains are invented. Union Pacific uses them for a while, and they briefly also are used for higher-speed trains in some places, but they never really go anywhere.

Gas-turbine trains: - more powerful than diesels - faster than diesels - very loud and kind of inefficient - these things were a bit strange weren't they?

1955 CE: Steam finally starts to die in Britain under BR's modernization plan, which sees electric (yay) and diesel (boo) trains replacing steam locomotives.

1959 CE: Ernest Marples becomes British Minister of Transport. He's also head of a road construction company. This means he wants more roads and less trains. This is a bad thing.

1960s CE: Dr Beeching (a guy Ernest Marples hired) makes a report suggesting closing most of Britain's rail network, starting with the least profitable and redundant routes. The government then ignores most of the suggestions in the report, and closes down whatever rail lines they feel like. Fortunately, the cuts aren't as large as the report suggested. Unfortunately, they are still enormous and cause huge damage to Britain's rail network that is only just starting to be repaired.

1964 CE: The Tokaido Shinkansen opens in Japan as the world's first dedicated high speed train. This marks the pinnacle of human transportation, and electric high speed rail takes its place as the most efficient, most comfortable, most environmentally friendly, and fastest (below a certain distance) form of transportation. Many other countries start to build their own networks, including France, Italy, Spain, China, Morocco, Turkey, Britain (tries to, anyway), some other places, and a couple failed attempts in the US (along with the successful kind-of-high-speed rail in the Northeast Corridor and the still under construction one in California).

1968 CE: Steam finally dies in Britain. Yes, after the Shinkansen was built. Unfortunately, diesel trains continue to exist to this day.

c. 1970 CE: Running out of money, the Milwaukee Road decides to end electrification, since diesels are much better than they used to be and fuel is pretty cheap.

1971 CE: With passenger service not making enough money (it was making money, just not enough money) due to all of those free government-provided highways and airplane subsidies, the US government under Richard Nixon forms Amtrak to take over passenger services and give them a quiet death. Fortunately, this doesn't work. Amtrak still exists, and Richard Nixon doesn't, so who's the real winner here?

1973 CE: The 70s oil crisis begins, and electric trains are suddenly back in fasion after gasoline and diesel become really really expensive. Except it ends before american railroads do anything.

1974 CE: The Milwaukee Road ends its last electric trains.

1976 CE: The Penn Central, formed from a merger between the Pennsylvania Railroad and New York Central, goes bankrupt and the US government replaces it with Conrail, a sort-of nationalization of some of the US rail network. This doesn't last either, with the network being sold off to Amtrak (who take as good care of it as they can with their limited money), and CSX & Norfolk Southern (who don't, but more on them later)

1977 CE: The Milwaukee Road goes bankrupt.

1980s CE: Several mergers between US railroads result in the B&O (under the Chessie System) becoming part of CSX Transportation (the most boring corporate named railroad in existence), while the Southern Railway (US) merges with the Norfolk & Western to form the Norfolk Southern railway.

1982 CE: The British Rail Class 455 – an electric multiple unit used in south London and the suburbs – is introduced.

1993 CE: Precision Scheduled Railroading – an ingenious way to squeeze as much money out of a railroad as possible while providing awful service, treating employees terribly, never investing in infrastructure until something collapses, not doing basic maintenance, and putting safety fourth – is created, and adopted by all of the largest railroads in North America.

Also 1993 CE: The privatization of British Rail begins. Generally considered a bad idea that even Thatcher wasn't going to do (although her privatizing everything else certainly encouraged it), it ends up creating a mess of privately owned companies, half of which end up being owned by foreign state-owned railway companies like SNCF and Trenitalia.

1994 CE: the british and french moved some trains (land vehicles) under water on some rails

c. 2000 CE: people start to care a lot about climate change, and then notice that electric trains are the most environmentally friendly form of transport (apart from walking I guess but let's see you walk anywhere from tens to hundreds of kilometers every time you want to go to a city you don't live in). Car traffic and local air pollution caused by cars are also problems, which trains can solve. (even diesel trains aren't as bad as cars. whether steam trains are as bad as cars is left as an excercise for the reader)

2001 CE: for no particular reason, planes become unpopular, americans suddenly remember trains exist, and Amtrak's brand new (introduced 2000 CE) sometimes high speed train the Acela becomes very popular.

2002 CE: after it turns out privatizing infrastructure and maintenance was a really bad idea that killed people, Britain's railway infrastructure is renationalized under Network Rail (that's us!)

2008 CE: massive financial crisis happens. China decides to spend hundreds of billions of dollars on high speed rail, the US (and to a lesser extent Europe) decide to spend hundreds of billions on bailing out the banks instead

c. 2018 CE: Battery-electric trains (which had existed in some form or another for over 100 years) and hydrogen powered trains (which were new) become things, because of the previously mentioned hatred of spending money by railroads (the pressure to at least appear sustainable combined with the desire to not spend any money on electrification caused these to exist)

Battery-electric trains - weaker and slower than all other types of train - terrible range (need charging very frequently) - require loads of rare earth metals - can catch fire really badly - the batteries eventually wear out (and are not as easy to replace - as the parts of other trains) - completely useless if you need high frequencies or long distances (you'd need to charge them so often that you'll end up reinventing third rail/overhead line electrification) - JUST ELECTRIFY PROPERLY DAMN IT

Hydrogen trains - anything hydrogen powered is either a scam or is going to explode. or both. explosions are only a good thing when going to space on a rocket and only when controlled. - why do these exist - why

2019 CE: In a major milestone for the company, Amtrak almost breaks even for the first time in its existence. (STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT TURN A PROFIT IT'S A PUBLIC SERVICE AND NEEDS AT LEAST AS MUCH MONEY AS THOSE SOCIALIST NATIONALIZED HIGHWAYS GET ALONG WITH SOME EXTRA FOR ALL OF THE MONEY THEY'VE MISSED OUT ON)

2020 CE: a global pandemic happens and everyone stays home. this means all of the privately operated train companies in the UK start losing loads of money (although a bunch of them were already government-owned. some even by the british government) and the conservatives are forced to do something. they do it badly as usual.

2020s CE: the british conservatives cancel almost all of HS2 except the bit that goes from Birmingham to near London (because they hate the north of england, and transit users, and the environment, and young people, and londoners, and effective infrastructure, and recovering from the pandemic, and investing in the futrue, and everything good in the world; and also because of the cost overruns and delays that they caused). They plan to start selling off the land safeguarded for the route so the north of England will never have high speed rail (or anywhere else in the country that didn't already have HS1. so basically everywhere except London) and no future government will be able to revive the project. Fortunately they lose the election before they can do this. Unfortunately the new government refuses to revive it (except saying it'll at least go to London), so the various northern mayors have to try and scrape together the money to build whatever replacement they can afford with the money they've found in the couch cushions.

2021 CE: Amtrak gets a whole bunch of money. Not as much as the highways get, but a lot more than they usually get, and they start making big plans, and there is some high speed rail still in progress in California (it's taking a while but they're still building all of it), and there may even be some in other places soon too.

2023 CE: Norfolk Southern blows up East Palestine (the town in Ohio) after dumping loads of toxic chemicals there, thanks to Precision Scheduled Railroading techniques. They mostly get away with this. Safety fourth!

2024 CE: The british government finally announces it's going to renationalize the railways under Great British Railways (and unlike the conservatives they actually use the term "renationalize"). Also, Network Rail is now on the tumbles (you're reading a post from it right now).

2025 CE: The first british train operating companies are set to be nationalized under GBR, just in time for 200 years since the Stockton & Darlington opened.

[faaun]

ok let's catch up quickly

[jorvikzelda]

This may be a good and normal thing but I have absolutely zero regrets about having purchased the laptop last night. Like all day yesterday and even as I was buying I was going oh god should I should I not but now I’m not even having second thoughts about the huge display lmao

[quimichi]

⌗﹒THEIR VOICE LINES ABOUT YOU ౨ৎ˚₊‧ GN!

Aether

❝Since the beginning of Mondstadt they've been with me. They actually turned out to be my second guide! Which makes Paimon even more of an emergency food❞

❝Whaa-Paimon will pretend Paimon didn't hear that!❞

❝No really, I'm glad I found them...or rather they found me. It really wasn't much of a surprise when I-oh-I'm already talking too much again.❞

❝Traveler can go shy when he talks about his lover, hehe. STOP PULLING ME AWAY-H-HEY-!❞

Albedo

❝Oh? I see, you already heard about Y/n. Well, its not a big of a surprise, they're well known here in Mondstadt. Don't worry, if you ever encounter them, dont be shy to talk to them. They have actually been a great help for my researches and experiments. ❞

Al-Haitham

❝ Y/N? Yes, what about them? Yes, we're in a relationship, and? No, I'm not mad, why? I'm asking to much questions? Could ask you that, you seem awfully interested in my partner. Passive aggressive? Pff, now you're just pretending things. ❞

Ayato

❝ You'd like to know more about Y/n? What makes you think I have answers? Oh? I see, Ayaka has told you about it, well...Me and Y/n have been in a relationship for quite a while now. They're a very good support, doesn't matter what path i take or decisions I make, they always have my back. Without them I wouldn't be half the man I am right now. Satisfied with this answer? ❞

Baizhu

❝ The person that always helps out here is not some assistant. Don't worry, I'm sure they're not insulted. Who else are they then? Oh, my lover. Whats with that surprised look on your face? Didn't think I'd be taken? To be frank...I'm quite surprised too that I got this lucky.❞

Bennett

❝ Y/n? My lucky charm? They're awesome! A loyal member in Benny's adventure team...the only one though...They go on every adventure with me! Saved my life multiple times! Bring me good furtune! And are my partner! Wow, I really lucked out for real this time.❞

Capitano

❝ I'd like to keep my private life as private as possible...but for you I make an exception, just this once. Yes, Y/n is my life partner, my lover if you'd like to put it that way. I hold them very dear and would protect them with my life if i have to. So, if I ever sense any bad intentions coming from you, I will crush you with everything I've got.❞

Childe

❝ They spend last winter with me and my family. So, to show them around and make them feel more comfortable in Snezhnaya we had a little snowball fight. Y/n got hit a dozen times in the face by Teucer. They lost, obviously. But the best part was, when we went home, the slipped right before the door and fell ass first to the ground...but instead of being upset or annoyed...they laughed. I knew they we're the one right then and there.❞

Chongyun

❝ Oh you know Y/n? Well, I do too. You knew? Xingqiu huh?...Can't seem to keep quite sometimes...Yes, I am dating them. Saying this feels foreign...I still can't believe they chose me of all people. But I'm not too insecure about it, after all, they chose me of all people.❞

Cyno

❝ Y/n is one of the few people who actually laugh at my jokes. I don’t know if its out of pity or if i truly make them laugh, but either way i don't care. As long as i see a smile on their face I'm at ease. Huh? What do you mean i sound lovesick?❞

Dainsleif

❝ There are things that I'd rather keep private and save, including my relationship with Y/n. So I have to apo-...no, i trust you but-...You're right. Y/n and I have been in a relationship for quite a long time now. They mean a lot to me, thats why I want to keep any information about them as private as I can.❞

Diluc

❝ Yes, I am in a relationship with Y/n. I guess the topic makes his rounds, huh? We announced our relationship just yesterday, but have been serious for a long time now. I am...not a public as you know. And i didn't wanted any unwanted or negative attention on both of us but i know i can trust you. Right?❞

Dottore

❝ Did i ever had a lover? What an inappropriate question of you~ Of course i had lovers, but none could compare to my favorite. Have you heard of Y/n? Oh yes, they are quite popular aren't they~? Well, they're mine, all mine. So it would be better for you if you keep your hands off them. ❞

Freminet

❝ Are they my friend? Uhm...no...they're a bit more than that. Uhm, yeah they're my partner. We've been together for a while now...Am i happy? Of course i am...I'm just a bit embarrassed thats all. No one has really asked me about our relationship yet except for Lyney, Lynette and father.❞

Gorou

❝ You want to know about Y/n? Sure, what do you wanna know? Yes, they're my partner, in fact, we live together! They're a really caring, they make breakfast every morning, tend any injuries i have and sometimes even run me a bath...that was too intimate.❞

Heizou

❝ Y/n? What do you know about them? Nothing yet but you wanna know more? Why? Interested? Why am I asking all these questions? I'm a detective, and you're interested in my lover-oops-now i ran my mouth.❞

Itto

❝ You mean the oni one for me?! The true love of my life!? THEY'RE AWESOME. I'm so incredibly lucky to have them. AND they're so incredibly lucky to have the awesome one and oni Arataki Itto as their boyfriend!❞

Kazuha

❝ They are currently waiting for my arrival...i cannot wait to have them in my arms again. I miss them every day...What's that book? Oh, it's just for all the poems i write for them while being away. One poem for each day. Once I'm back, i read them to them.❞

Kaeya

❝ Oh you mean my little snowflake? Yes, i know them quite well, i can assure you that one. Wasn't always like that though, took is a while to actually get closer. But i won't complain either way, I'm happy that we finally found each other...damn, look at all the sappy things I'm saying, they've done this to me.❞

Kaveh

❝ I'm still planning our house, i just cannot make it perfect! Ugh, it's really getting on my nerves. I NEED this perfect for them, I need to make this the house of their dreams. But it's taking way to long. Since when am i planning? About 3 years. And since when are we dating? Also about 3 years...oh...❞

Kinich

❝ When they first traveled to Natlan they didn't met me immediately. I've only got to know them through Mualani and Kachina. They once expressed their hatred towards saurian hunters, went off yapping for a good hour too. You should've seen the look on their face once i told them i was one of them. They're still embarrassed to this day, even more after i explained what i really do. One of the many memories that truly make me happy.❞

Lyney

❝ They're aware that true magic doesn't exist. That all my shows are just an act. That somewhere is a trick hidden, so simple its ridiculous. And yet, they're still amazed, still getting big eyed when I'm on stage preforming. Even after countless shows that are the same, they're clapping along like it was the first....I couldn't not have asked for a better support and love in my life then them.❞

Mika

❝ I still don't know how i managed to confess, maybe it's because i can't really remember it anyway. It's a memory I'd like to forget entirely, mostly because i was so embarrassed afterwards. But I never want to forget what they said afterwards. Everytime i hear those 4 words from them I get butterflies.❞

Neuvillette

❝ Y/n and I are in a serious relationship since 5 years and 4 months. We have been living together since 3 years and 1 month. I do consider our relationship deep and intimate. I trust them deeply and never once did I think about it otherwise. I truly believe that our relationship will hold on for eternity. Is this enough information or should I tell you more?❞

Pantalone

❝ Ah, my spoiled little brat? Joking, joking...well, only half. I do spoil them quite a lot, but i wouldn't consider them a brat...most of the time. Just last week I bought them this new coat, winter in Snezhnaya are the hardest in all Teyvat. Oh, and new gloves, a scarf an-no, why would i brag with my money, it's not like i have enough to buy at least million of coats.❞

Pierro

❝ The only thing you need to know is that they are with me and well taken care off. Should you not remember the fact that any hate or violence towards them is strictly forbidden, i will gladly remind you. ❞

Razor

❝ Y/n helped Razor a lot. Razor appreciates it, the help. Razor also loves Y/n. That's what Y/n always tells Razor every day. So Razor tells Y/n every day too.❞

Scaramouche

❝ Who? My lover? Them? No, I would never. No, I'm not keeping anything private?! Neither am I ashamed of anything...quite the opposite, huh? No, said nothing. Screw off now, i need to be somewhere. Where? None of your damn business...So what if its a date?!❞

Thoma

❝ Mhm, you're quite right, Y/n and I arw together. Lucked out, huh? I'm currently teaching them how to cook some dishes, been going well...for the most part. No, they have a hand for it but both of us always seem to lose any focus once we're 30 minutes into it.❞

Tighnari

❝ You should've heard their begging, "Oh Tighnari please, i can keep my own garden!" Yeah, keeping it, but not take care of it. Because who takes care of it? Correct, me. It's easy work, so it's not too troublesome. But what is troublesome is how they don't take care of it. *sigh* maybe i am a bit to harsh on them, they are a bit stressed lately anyway. They deserve to take a rest and calm down from everything. So i gladly take care of the garden, for as long as they need me to.❞

Venti

❝ Our first meeting was quite the embarrassing one, almost feel quite shy telling it....Ok! Ok! I'll tell you!....I fell into their lap...No, i wasn't drunk! Someone else was, pushed me by accident and i stumbled backwards right onto their lap in angels share. And to top it off i took their plate and drink with me. Lucky for me, they weren't mad at all. Still...it's so embarrassing!❞

Wriothesley

❝ Took them quite a while to adjust to Meropide. Understandable though, it's a change from the surface. But once they grew comfortable, it's almost like they don't want to leave. They quickly befriended almost everyone, especially Sigewinne. They grew quite popular here in the matter of just a few weeks. Good for me i got them first before anyone else could.❞

Xiao

❝ Hm? Oh, them? Yes, we're close. Why do you ask? Just curious? Ugh, don't look at me like that. What do you wanna hear? How much i love them? You can wait till the day Teyvat will shatter entirely, I won't say it to you, only to them.❞

Xingqiu

❝ Our love story is picture perfect. A written love story by the finest ink. Full of clichés. We reached for the same book, and our hands touched. Then and there, i was mesmerized...until they snatched the book first.❞

Zhongli

❝ Our love story has been holding on since 3717 years, and it will hold on for many years more. What makes me so sure it will? We love each other like it was the very first day. Never once did we lie to one another, were apart from each other or lost our trust. I do have a contract anyway if anything should happen.❞

[spacedace]

Here have some snippets of the AU that’s taken over my brain (featuring Elle unintentionally dunking on both of Bruce’s identities, Clark realizing he passed his taste in partners on to his son, a bit of pre/unaware that they are dating Super Serious Chaos, and some blink-and-you-miss-it background Enemies to Lovers Dick/Dan)

---

“Sorry, who’s Bruce Wayne?”

The room when quiet. All heads turned to look at Elle at the end of the table. Bruce didn’t visibly react, but Clark could make out the subtle indication of disbelief that his old friend was feeling - that they all were feeling at the interpreter’s question. Elle, suddenly aware she had the full room’s attention, had the look of someone who realized they’d said something wrong, but didn’t know what.

“You’re kidding.” John said, “You know Bruce Wayne. Everyone knows Bruce Wayne.”

Elle blinked. “I don’t.” She glanced from face to face, “Is he like a big deal? Does he work here or something? I haven’t been around that long so I might have missed him.”

It took every bit of self control Clark had not to laugh. His voice still came out a bit strangled from the effort as he offered, “No he doesn’t work here.” If Bruce was the type to do so in uniform, he’d be kicking Clark under the table.

“You live in Gotham. You have to know Bruce Wayne.” Barry said, voice going a bit high with growing bewilderment. “Mega ba-jillionair. CEO of Wayne Tech? Richest man in Gotham - in the world? Has like a hundred kids?”

Their interpreter’s nose scrunched. “So he’s like…in one of those fundamentalist cults obsessed with having a bunch of kids or something?”

Bruce actually twitched at that. The sound of utter disgust in Elle’s voice at the concept, the complete and total lack of any kind of recognition she had for the single most famous non-crime or crime-fighting related person in the city that she lived in, she truly had no idea who they were talking about. Clark had to get a recording of the room’s security feed, Lois would love this. Oh, wait no, Bruce’s kids. Maybe if he was fast enough he could text Dick to get there ASAP so he could see it all in person before it was over.

“No! Nothing like that! He adopted them - well most of them.” Barry tried to explain, looking utterly lost as he turned from Elle to the rest of them and back again. “You’re messing with us right? This is like a joke?”

Elle shook her head, looking just as lost as Barry did. “I have no idea who you’re talking about.”

“Do you know Dick Grayson?”

“I know of an officer Grayson who is a dick. Total tool. He’s been making my brother’s Dan’s life miserable for like a year now. Pretty sure not who you’re talking about though.”

“Jason Todd.”

“The library goon?”

“Tim Drake.”

“Sounds like a Dark Wing Duck character.”

“Cassandra Cain.”

“Isn’t that the author that started out writing incest Harry Potter fanfic?”

“Duke Thomas?”

“What’s he a Duke of?”

Barry snapped his fingers, pointing emphatically at Elle with a look of victory on his masked face as he shouted, “Damian Wayne!”

Damian, who had at that moment just walked into the meeting room with Jon at his heels paused in his place just behind Elle. He did pretty well at hiding his surprise at Barry seemingly shouting his civilian name and pointing at him upon walking in. Though the tense line of his shoulders suggested that if Barry was actually revealing his secret identity without warning or permission, there would be blood.

Stella Nightingale, unaware of the almost-kinda identity reveal going on around her, tilted her head in confusion at the speedster. “I’m assuming he’s related to that Bruce Wayne guy?”

“They’re all related to Bruce Wayne.” John said with open amusement now. The Green Lantern had given up on the research entirely, watching the entire debacle with a growing smirk he kept casting towards Bruce. “That man’s face is plastered absolutely everywhere in the news. How do you not know who he is?”

“If Lois Lane hasn’t written about him he can’t be that important.” Elle said with a casual certainty of one speaking a core tenant of their beliefs. Clark’s opinion of the young woman - already quite high considering her ferocious loyalty and fondness to Jon - rose sharply.

“You’re read the Daily Planet?” Clark asked, warmth curling in his chest at the mention of his wife and her work.

“I read articles by Lois Lane.” Elle said promptly, “I tried reading some articles that Kent guy she partners with sometimes wrote on his own but I couldn’t get past his writing style. Dude sounds like he’s from outer space with his word choice sometimes.”

Bruce, looking far too pleased, gave a quiet and not terribly convincing cough as Clark tried to will his soul back into his body.

It was going to be a long day.

—

“You are at least aware of who Gotham’s vigilantes are, yes?” Damian asked with a raised brow behind his mask.

Elle shrugged, giving him a sly smile. “The relevant ones.”

Clark tried to hide his short laugh with a feigned cough. Elle at least was distracted enough with Jon and Damian’s attention to notice but Bruce was giving him a look over the tablet he was trying - and undoubtedly failing - to review files on.

Jon grinned eagerly from his spot beside Elle as he asked, “Aren’t they all relevant to you? You live in Gotham.”

“I live in Crime Alley.” Elle corrected, bumping his shoulder with hers. “We have different standards of relevancy there.”

“So what are the relevant ones then?” Clark asked, pointedly ignoring Bruce’s burning stare. They’d get back to the research. Eventually. Finding out if the Gothamite who had been spending all her free time with Phoenix and Flamebird for the past year and a half was as oblivious to her city’s heroes as she was its celebrities was too entertaining a notion to pass up.

“Phoenix, obviously.” She grinned cheekily at Damian across the table, ticking names off her fingers as she continued. “Red Hood. Spoiler. Uh…Orphan?” She trailed off, forehead scrunching in concentrated thought.

“That’s can’t be all the ones you know.” Jon gaped, eyes sparkling with amusement as he glanced over to were Bruce was seated, not five feet away before turning back to watch Elle try to rack her brain for any more Gotham vigilantes. Clark could see the moment that the words are taken as a challenge as Elle sat up and looked more determined.

“No, shut up, I know more. Uh…there’s the one, um Red Sparrow? It’s another bird one with red name, I’m pretty sure. And the one with the blue - fuck I should know his name. Nightjar? Wasn’t Nightingale I would have remembered that…shit, dude threw up on our couch once I should remember his name -“

“Nightwing threw up on your couch?”

“Nightwing! That’s the bitch! He got poisoned or something and Dan drug him to our place to patch him up since Doc Thompkins’ clinic was closed.”

Clark shared a look with Bruce and Damian. Dick had failed to mention that little event. Clark could see Bruce reaching for his wrist computer, undoubtedly typing out a message his eldest about what he’d just heard - possibly another to Alfred if he was feeling like pulling out the big guns.

At the other end of the table Elle ticked Nightwing off with a nod, even as Jon squawked that it shouldn’t count since he’d given her the name, “Then there’s…uh…oh! Harley Quinn!”

“Harley Quinn does not count.”

“She beat up a guy trying to mug me last week and got me a hot chocolate afterwards, she totally counts!”

“Someone tried to mug you?”

“Crime Alley, Nix, if someone doesn’t try to mug me while I’m out I get worried that I missed Hood calling in a Street Clear for something big.”

“We’re going to circle back on that later.” Jon said, sharing a pointed glance with Damian. It looked like young Miss Nightingale was going to be getting escorted to and from the Watchtower from now on.

Ah, Clark mused, falling head over heels for someone with no understanding of the concept of self-preservation and a stubborn determination to run straight into the heart of danger without a second thought. It brought back such fond memories. Of both Lois and Bruce. And Diana. And - Hmm. Kara might have been right. Clark might have a type.

Watching the three at the other end of the table and taking them in, Clark realized he might have passed his taste in partners on to his son. Well, at least he’ll be able to give Jon some advise on how to handle the heart attacks Damian and Elle will inevitably give him.

“Harley Quinn doesn’t count. You got any more?”

Elle rolled her eyes, muttering about Harley totally counts, before leaning back in her chair. “I think I’m out. I know there’s more but,” She gave a shrug, “I’m tapped out. Those are all the ones I can think of.”

It was, surprisingly, Bruce that spoke up at that declaration, a slant of amusement to his lips as he asked, “No one else comes to mind?”

Elle waved him off, attention turning to the mountain of alien script they needed her to translate for them. It was the reason she was even there rather than in her office trying to translate whatever incredibly dangerous magic tomb JL Dark had dropped off without accidentally summoning a demon or ending hte world in the process. J’onn was right, they really should give her a raise.“That’s all I got.” She said with a sigh, “Like I said, I know the relevant ones.”

“Hn.”

Twenty minutes of shared looks of amusement and suppressed laughter later Elle’s head shot up, a look of wide eyed embarrassment on her face. “Oh my god.”

“There it is.”

“About time Nightingale, I was starting to be concerned about your mental faculties.”

“Shut up, this so embarrassing!”

“Don’t sweat it kid, we all have our moments.”

“I can’t believe I forgot Signal.”

“What.”

---

Context of this snippet if anyone is interested:

This is actually the same AU as the Steph & Jason sibling bonding Anger Management snippet from a bit ago (I’m calling it my Ghosts in Gotham AU in scrivener so I guess that’s what I’ll call it here lol). This time focused on Elle and her misadventures as a Totally Normal Civilian (TM) working for the Justice League with her two besties Jon & Damian (none of them realize yet that they’ve been dating for months).

No idea when this is supposed to take place in terms of timeline with the other snippet, but kinda vibing the idea that while Steph & Jason are having a heart to heart on a rooftop over their shared background and Jason’s future as a dad, Elle is up in the Watchtower telling Bruce Wayne to his face that she has no idea who he is and forgetting Batman is a Gotham vigilante while he’s sitting at the same table as her.

Anyway, this AU has taken over my life. Expect more nonsense to come lol

[talia-black]

Relationship Headcanons (Liyue Boys)

Okay, these posts don’t really follow a precise formatting, but there is a general line of reasoning I try to stick to when doing these headcanons. First paragraph is mainly explaining how the character’s circumstances would affect their position on having a significant other, and any kind of pre-existing ideas (if they have any) about what the character would want from their significant other. Second, what they didn’t know they wanted from a significant other, and how their partner would care for them/express their affection as a romantic partner. Third, some general ideas of what circumstances and person the character would fall. Some are more specific than others based on the reasons explained in the first paragraph. Fourth, how long it takes for the character to realize their feelings, how long it takes for them to confess, and then how they would go about dating their potential partner. Last paragraph is mainly how the character would act in a settled relationship and some ways they would express affection. For the most part angst free when it comes to the actual relationships.

I’m so sorry Xiao’s took up so much. He’s the reason I started playing Genshin and his emotional walls took my entire stamina bar to scale. I just want to do our favorite emo boy right <3

I will be grouping characters by their home regions, or at least where the character is living/currently considers home, so Childe will be with the other Snezyneyans. As for those with unknown origins… we’ll see if I make it there. 

(Also no Chongyun. I’m so sorry, but I don’t have him and I just don’t have a good enough grasp on his character for me to be able to write for him. To all of the Chongyun appreciators, I extend my deepest apologies. He seems sweet and cute.) 

SO= Significant Other Link to the Mondstadt Boys post

BAIZHU 

Honestly, my personal favorite out of all the Liyue men (His story quest is a work of art) but I promise to try and not let that affect my judgment. Baizhu is another workaholic, except in this case the workaholic in question is quite ill most of the time and continues to make himself even more ill in order to fulfill his oath and calling as a doctor. Between his work at the pharmacy, his own personal research, and managing his illness, he is another who wouldn’t give much thought to a romantic relationship. He had briefly thought about it in his youth, as many adolescents often do, but whatever desires he might have had were forgotten when he began his studies. Hypothetically speaking, Baizhu would want a significant other who shares his world views. Outside his flawless professional reputation, the few people who know him somewhat closely don’t fully support his pursuit of immortality. An SO who Baizhu felt safe enough to confide in, and fully believed in his goal, would mean everything to him. 

What Baizhu didn’t know he wanted in an SO was someone who didn’t just support his goals, but actively helped him pursue them while simultaneously making sure he took care of himself. Someone who would go herb gathering when Qiqi was busy with other errands, who would force Baizhu to take naps when he was fatigued and took care of the pharmacy on his behalf. Someone who would secretly stay up late into the night a few times a week in order to study every single medical text Baizhu had in his possession. Baizhu didn’t even notice they did this until they managed to diagnose a patient quicker than him. 

“Now where did you learn to identify such subtle symptoms darling?” 

“Your old textbooks make for excellent nighttime reading.”

I think for Baizhu to even consider someone romantically the first meeting would have to be outside a professional capacity. Perhaps they were a resident of Chenyu Vale who ran into Baizhu while he was searching for herbs. They were a photographer putting together a photo album to advertise to tourists, and coincidentally some of the most photogenic areas happened to host the plants Baizhu was looking for. Baizhu was fascinated in how they managed to capture the beauty of life, and when he found out they would be moving to Liyue soon he invited them to stop by Buba Pharmacy if they ever needed anything. However, he wouldn’t see them again until the next Lanturn Rite, when they came looking for him after Qiqi told them he was too sick to leave his room. They sat at Baizhu’s bedside despite his protests and made him soup. Baizhu woke up the next morning feeling better than he had in ages, and the sight of them passed out with their arms folded at the end of his bed practically had hearts radiating from his eyes. 

Baizhu is someone who is incredibly emotionally intelligent, making the time between the initial discovery of feelings and the realization of those feelings incredibly short. And the confession would only take as long as is necessary for him to gauge whether they might also be potentially interested in him. From there, it's straight to the admittance of feelings. Most likely somewhere secluded and scenic. Either by the seaside, or in the mountains at night where he asked them out on a picnic. He would know early on whether they were right for him, and though he’s incredibly inexperienced when it comes to romantic engagements, Baizhu finds that he is perfectly content to let them lead the way. He made sure to leave Buba Pharmacy to Gui at least one afternoon a week in order to spend time with them. This typically is excused as “herb gathering” (aka, they are trying to find new photo spots while Baizhu spends most of the time listening to them talk. Gui never comments that Baizhu’s basket is rarely even half-full when he returns). Nobody really knows their relationship exists. Not because they go to any length to hide their relationship but just because no one really knows Baizhu outside of his job. Once the right person notices though, it's the talk of Liyue for a few weeks. The benevolent but distant doctor is dating? How shocking! But after the few scraps of gossip ran dry and both Baizhu and his SO refused to feed into them, they died as quickly as they came about.

Expect lots of gentle affection from Baizhu. His SO would never doubt for a second that he treasures them beyond what is capable of being expressed in words, but it isn’t the all-consuming love that many other Genshin characters would give. He is secure in his life and situation, and it's rare that Baizhu feels any kind of desperation for his SO’s affection that would manifest in the way he expresses his love to them. When it does though, needless to say his SO would be calling it an early night to fill his prescription of cuddles <3. Nothing much would change once they married. Baizhu would just have to remember to take off his wedding ring before examining his patients.  Until of course Baizhu either succeeds in his goal, or he heals one person too many and places his life in an even more precarious position than before, forcing his SO to choose between saving the man they love and helping their husband fulfill their dream. But these posts are supposed to be mostly angst free so we’re not going to talk about that :)

Well. On the topic of angst, any relationship with Xiao (romantic or otherwise) is almost like a reverse of Baizhu’s. All of the baggage hits full in the face immediately upon introduction. As has been shown throughout the entirety of the game, Xiao is a walking ball of trauma and self-loathing. Between his abusive master, the archon war, and the deaths of his fellow yakshas, Xiao hasn’t had a period of true happiness in a long time. Even now, when Liyue is at peace and Xiao is freed from his contract, he’s not able to begin healing. His karmic debt acts as a poison, forcing Xiao to keep a distance from humans or risk accidentally infecting them with god remains. However, Xiao also uses that as an excuse to continue avoiding any form of non-essential interaction with others. Centuries of ending the lives of countless gods and beasts alike has convinced Xiao he is incapable of doing anything other than cause harm. Undeserving of anything except the agony of his karma and self-imposed solitude. Even the idea of an SO that loves and cherishes him is so completely beyond his comprehension that he could be married to them and he would still have to wrestle with the voices in his head that say they don’t actually want anything to do with him.

What Xiao didn’t know he wanted was one: an SO. And two: an SO who exists outside of the violence and hardship. Someone who gives Xiao a safe space for him to let go of his burdens and just rest without his karmic debt hanging over him. Someone who would give Xiao the opportunity to heal. 

Unfortunately, a mortal SO is out of the question. The Visionless can’t be around Xiao for extended periods of time, and even those with visions risk being afflicted with karma. This would inevitably put a strain on the relationship, so Xiao’s SO would have to be some kind of semi-immortal in order to give him some peace of mind. Most likely a fellow adeptus or another semi-immortal. Someone who will at least have heard of Xiao’s past but also doesn’t know him the way many of the adeptus with close relations to Liyue do and are entirely used to Xiao’s behaviors.

I can see Xiao doing his usual patrols and ends up fighting a large group of monsters near Qingce Village. He hasn’t let himself rest recently, combined with a few lucky shots from Hilichurl archers and a well-timed swing from a mitachurl pushes Xiao to his limit. He manages to finish off his opponents, but collapses before he can teleport back to Wangshu Inn. He wakes up partially submerged in a pool of water, an unfamiliar face looming over him. Panicked, but still weak, it took everything in him to leap away and teleport back to the inn. XIao immediately fell to his knees and resigned himself to laying down on the roof while he regained his strength. Once he could lift his head he checked for any injuries, and was baffled to find any trace of his battle gone. The only sign he had even been wounded was a quickly fading scar on his right bicep. Even the tear in his clothes had been restitched. The being, they hadn’t looked like any spirit or monster, and yet the aura that radiated from them was certainly not human. Days later, Xiao was fully recovered and the mysterious being was still weighing heavily on his mind. He didn’t have any idea of where he had been before he teleported back to the inn, so seeking them out would be nearly impossible. It was only after much deliberation that he decided to consult Mo-... Zhongli.

Zhongli, while shocked to see Xiao inquiring after something unrelated to his contract, provided him with what he knew. From Xiao’s description, the archon remarked that they sounded like one of the younger adepti that had emerged after Fujin vanished. Healing spirits who blessed the water of Chenyu Vale, and would often ease the ailments of those who were brave enough to venture to the underground lakes that were their homes. Zhongli mentioned that one in particular was far more willing to venture above their subterranean home and aid travelers making the increasingly dangerous journey from Qingce Village to Chenyu Vale. When the retired archon asked why Xiao was so curious about them, he watched in amusement as Xiao’s milk white skin flushed ever so slightly in embarrassment. He mumbled out a shortened version of what had transpired, and Zhongli lightly scolded the adepti for being so reckless, and advised him to seek out the healer and properly thank them for their assistance. The yaksha bid him goodbye and swiftly moved to the area Zhongli had directed him to. Carefully tucked away in a valley of broken statues and old stone faces was an old, worn passage. On instinct he summoned his polearm. Such areas were often infested with monsters and old spirits, and the yaksha had not survived a millennia of bloodshed by being careless. However, his caution turned out to be unwarranted. The dark winding tunnel was rather short, and opened up to a breathtaking underground spring. An old willow’s branches hung low over the pond, and resting beneath it was a figure identical to the one Xiao had seen before. Unwilling to disturb them, but also hesitant to simply leave and come back later, he decided to do what he did best. The adepti awoke to find Xiao perched in their tree, facing the entrance of the cave. Xiao was caught off guard how after their initial shock, they were actually really excited to see him. Xiao tried to maintain a distance, which only lasted a short time before they bullied him into letting them check his wounds. After confirming that all his wounds had healed properly, they pressed a Qingxin charm into his hand and promised to come if he was ever hurt or in need of assistance. Completely overwhelmed by their enthusiasm and the absurdity of their offer, Xiao did the only thing he could think of. He teleported away. Only to reappear a few months later with a mitachurl’s ax still lodged in his gut. His visits became more frequent and less a matter of life or death as he found himself being drawn to the kind and lively adeptus. Sometimes his visits wouldn’t even involve interaction at all. He would just appear in the branches of their tree and watch them as they tended to their grotto and the animals that knew they could seek them out whenever they were injured.

Xiao is emotionally constipated. It would take him a looooooooong time to figure out that the peculiar feeling in his chest that swelled up whenever he was near them was love. Such a realization would then be followed by immediately abandoning all interaction with anyone while he grappled with feelings and urges he had never experienced before. Xiao would eventually seek out Zhongli for advice on how to get rid of the feelings. Unfortunately for him, Morax was secretly overjoyed that Xiao had found it in himself to willingly interact with someone else for his own pleasure. He knew Xiao better than anyone, and he already could envision the anxieties and fears plaguing the yaksha’s mind when being faced with such a fragile and frightening feeling such as love. In his infinite wisdom, he told Xiao that the best way to rebalance himself is to admit his feelings to the adepti. His confession would ease his own burdens, while also giving them a proper explanation as to why Xiao had been avoiding them. Xiao’s cheeks flushed at the idea, but Zhongli had never led him astray before. The adepti was quite amused at Xiao’s blunt admission of feelings, and even more so when Xiao’s cheeks turned the color of ripe Sunsettias after they gave him a kiss on the cheek. The color further saturated when they said they felt the same. 

The relationship would start out awkward. Xiao’s experience with courtship is reduced to what he’s observed from human couples and the adepti, which has given him a lot of conflicting information about what he should be doing. Should he be holding their hand whenever they’re together? Should he give them a gift during an important occasion? Xiao’s uncertainty and anxiety would cause him to send very confusing signals to his SO, where something that he was perfectly fine with one day caused him to flinch away the next. Eventually the SO was the one to seek out assistance, as they had no idea what they were doing either. They had spoken with Cloud Retainer on a few occasions over the centuries and they knew she maintained somewhat close relations with their favorite yaksha, so they figured she would be able to offer some advice. Pleased that Xiao was finally attempting to open up to someone, Cloud Retainer told his SO that he simply needed time to adjust. He was entirely new to active relationships, and openly communicating their desires to him would be the best way to provide him direction. As the years passed, the awkwardness bled into a much more comfortable and easygoing routine. After a night of battling monsters and demons, Xiao would retreat to their shared abode to rest in his SO’s arms. They had rearranged a small cave next to the healing pool to create a nest that soothed Xiao’s dormant avian instincts, never commenting when Xiao would spend hours rearranging it whenever he would add something new or decided that the pillows needed to be changed. On one such morning when the sun was already peaking over the mountains, both of them had already retired to the nest. Xiao had his SO tucked underneath his chin and his back to the opening of the cave. No monster dared tread within a mile of this cave anymore, but some habits could never completely be broken. All is peaceful, before a truly brutal realization stakes Xiao in a way karma never could. He was… happy. The peace he had only scraps of for centuries was now being given in quantities that made him feel slothful and glutinous. A single tear rolled down his cheek and fell onto his SO’s hand that was settled protectively over his heart. His SO blinked back into awareness and immediately cupped Xiao’s cheek upon seeing the glazed look in his eye.

“Dearest heart, are you alright? Is there something I can do?” 

Xiao nuzzles their hand before burrowing his face in the crook of their shoulder. Aching for his wings in order to hide them both away in the nest. 

“It's nothing Blossom. Please, rest. I merely wish to enjoy your presence for a little while longer.”

ZHONGLI

Another archon, however he is very different from Venti. Zhongli has always been closely tied to the people of his nation in a way the God of Freedom has never been with his. His SO could hold any occupation, come from any background, and Zhongli would find a way to connect with them. Unlike Venti I think he would secretly wish his SO would accept his offer to extend their life. He has lost too many friends and loved ones over the years that to fall so hard and treasure someone so closely only to lose them would be the final straw that broke his countenance completely. He would see his duty to its end, watching over Liyue Harbor, but he would do it from afar. There would be no consultant at Wangshang Funeral Parlor who knew more about the lands than seasoned historians. No friendly face in the crowd at Liyue’s many performances and festivals. Only a solitary soul who spends his days in the ruins on top of Mt. Aocang, reliving memories that had been lost to time the same way the faces of cliffs are worn down by the waves. While over the millenia he has found a handful of companions he grew particularly fond of, in his earlier years he had few goals beyond the protection of Liyue and the expansion of his hoard. After centuries of mellowing out, Zhongli’s priorities have shifted greatly, and only a few of his closest friends walk the same plane as him now. His love could be of the mortal or immortal realm, all he would ask of them was that they vow to stand by his side until the great mountains of Liyue are swallowed by the sea.

What Zhongli didn’t know he wanted was an SO who was as good of a speaker as he was a listener. Someone still somewhat naive to the ways of the world and a boundless curiosity and desire to understand everything. That innate desire that manifested in conversations that seldom lasted less than an hour. For the first time in his long life, Zhongli’s tea would cool before he remembered it was there. He simply could not tear his attention away from the sparks that radiated from their eyes whenever they launched into a new line of inquiry. 

As said previously, background or profession would not be an obstacle for Zhongli now that he was posing as a mortal. But I think Zhongli would be quickly endeared to someone who loved stories as much as he did. Whether it be an opera, a puppet show, or just oral retellings, he would quickly find himself interested in someone who is similarly fascinated by the art of story-telling. It would start out simple. Perhaps by inviting them to Third-Round Knockout to listen and discuss the stories told by Tian. Before long the conversation would extend beyond stories and trail into whatever topic of interest had come up. Soon after that meeting for tea would lead into long walks around Liyue, and then taking turns inviting each other to their homes for dinner. Zhongli is the perfect gentleman out of habit, and I have no doubt he would unintentionally win his SO’s heart before they even started officially courting. It would all culminate at Lanturn Rite when they would pluck up the courage to give him a kiss on the cheek right as the fireworks went off. It was the first and only evening where Zhongli didn’t escort them back to their abode before returning to his. 

Zhongli didn’t leave his apartment for a few days as he took considerable thought into evaluating his relationship with them and whether he wanted to reciprocate their affections that seemed rather obvious in hindsight. A few days later, his SO would start the day with a knock at their door. They would open it to see a young man holding a large bouquet of peonies and jasmine along with a gold-flaked letter. The man explained a gentleman had paid him handsomely to ensure both the flowers and letter reached them. They thanked the man profusely before taking both of the offerings inside. They opened the letter to reveal an invitation to dinner at the Pearl Gallery the following evening as well as a VIP pass to allow them to board. They didn’t want to get their hopes up, but they only knew one man that would write a dinner invitation in golden ink. They may have called off work and dipped into their savings to buy a new outfit that would look somewhat appropriate to wear to such an exquisite and up-scale establishment. The next day they spent hours getting ready, unaware that Zhongli was doing the same. When they were admitted onto the Pearl Gallery they were shocked to find the venue entirely empty, except for Zhongli. Their mouth went dry when they saw he had exchanged his regular outfit for an obsidian black overcoat and a white waistcoat. Gold details were everywhere, from the buttons to the intricately detailed dragon that coiled over the coat’s shoulder and trailed down the sides. The outfit itself only drew attention to Zhongli’s eyes, which would have fooled a master jeweler into thinking they were the finest of polished amber. Little did they know Zhongli was twice as smitten. It was hard to tell in the low-light, but his normally immaculate composure was stained with blushing cheeks and dilated pupils. Nevertheless, he quickly rose to his feet and greeted his date with a short but passionate kiss on the back of their hand. They were escorted to their seat just as a waiter arrived to confirm their order. The meal was accompanied by an immaculate performance by the Yun-Han opera troupe. The night was magnificent, and any lingering doubts were dispelled on both sides. 

“We are in luck the moon has hidden itself tonight, for I fear your beauty might cause it to crumble in envy.”

“You flatter me so sweetly qīn qīn. I dare say it would only take a single word from you to bring the moon back to its senses.”

As the show came to a close, Zhongli escorted them off the boat and back to their house. Upon reaching the door, Zhongli presented them with an ornate box. As is tradition, he had elected to select a courting gift in order to officially declare his advances. They cautiously lifted the lid and gasped when they saw the ornate golden necklace nestled within. Zhongli didn’t get to finish his courtship proposal because they broke down in tears halfway through it. 

Zhongli is someone who would see being in a committed relationship as only a half-step down from marriage. Once the feelings are there, acknowledged, and reciprocated in full, he doesn’t hold back. From the beginning of his relationship with his SO, he fits in seamlessly with their life. They never go grocery shopping alone again, and Celestia forbid they even consider carrying the bags. They are given gifts on a weekly, if not bi-weekly basis. Everything from exotic teas to priceless jewelry that they always wore out when they knew they would be seeing Zhongli. However, there’s one last hurdle. Zhongli’s true identity. It took some time, but eventually he managed to arrange a trip to Jueyan Karst under the guise of a “sight-seeing visit”. When he showed them his true form, they fainted. Zhongli was glad he managed to catch them on his tail and carefully brought them to his nest. They woke up surrounded by dragon and nearly fainted again before Zhongli transformed back. It was only after expressing his sincerity and desire to spend the rest of their life together (He wanted to ease them into the idea of immortality over time. After all, they were still young. He would accept the risk of waiting instead of forcing their hand). They would ask for a few days to think about it, which would make Zhongli incredibly anxious but he would accept it. And when they met him at their usual table at Third-Round Knockout and started talking like nothing had ever happened while carefully placing their hand over his, he is filled with a contentment that he hasn’t felt since before the Archon War. 

(Please excuse the detail, this man does things to me. Especially when I think of him in a black suit)

GAMING

I 10000% see this little cinnamon roll as someone who would marry their childhood crush. He just radiates cute boy next door vibes and I absolutely live for that. Gaming probably has the most normal understanding and expectations of relationships out of all the males in Genshin, so nothing crazy here. He’s had a few crushes and gone on one or two dates. Since moving to Liyue he’s tried to move on, but for some reason no one makes him feel the same way as his friend back home does. No one’s smile seems quite as bright, no one’s laughter as pleasing to hear. Gaming has even caught himself composing letters to them and imagining what they would think of the various sights in Liyue when he’s supposed to be on duty. Gaming just wants a partner who will cheer him on during his Wushu dances and let him take them out for dim sum afterwards. A complete and total sweetheart. 

What Gaming didn’t know he wanted in a significant other was someone that didn’t just show-up to his performances and ate dim sum with him, but someone who would actively encourage and help him with all aspects of his life. Someone who would secretly maintain and fix his equipment while he was out at work. Someone who would make and pass out flyers for his performances. Someone who tries their best to improve their cooking skills so they don't end up blowing so much mora on eating out. Upon finding out everything his SO is doing for him, Gaming would practically pounce on them and drown them in kisses and cuddles, praising them endlessly for being so sweet and kind to him.

Gaming seems the type to develop a crush early in his childhood and never let it go. I can vividly picture six year-old Gaming picking a few flowers from his family’s garden even if he’s not supposed to, offering them, and asking shyly if they want to go see the Wushou dancers with him. But after he practically ran away from home, he didn’t send letters or keep in touch out of fear of what they would think of his choices. It hurt a lot, but a clean break seemed like the best idea at the time. It wasn’t until a few years later he encountered them again. Maybe they came to Liyue for business, or he ran into them by chance while on the job, but either way it was an unexpected reunion. Gaming freezes initially, not quite sure what they’re reaction to seeing him again will be. When they almost run up to him and give him a hug, he’s quick to squeeze them back and he has to stop himself from twirling them around like he did when they were kids. 

It wouldn’t take long once the two started hanging out together again for Gaming to realize the feelings he had for them hadn’t lessened at all, and now that he was an adult, he was finally able to give the feelings their accurate name. Gaming’s confession would depend on his SO’s circumstances. If they had a responsibility/career that took up a lot of their time, or were still in the process of getting over a past partner, he would wait as long as he thought was necessary for them to be ready to consider him a partner. If there was no obstacle, he would wait just long enough to plan a surprise romantic outing (probably a picnic) where he would put on a private Wushou dance for them before confessing his feelings. Upon his SO’s acceptance, he would simultaneously give the most hesitant but eager kiss of all time. 

From there Gaming would be the most attentive boyfriend of all time. Any sign of affection or gift given must be repaid tenfold; they gave him a quick peck on the cheek? Gaming stops whatever he was doing to smother them in kisses. They still have dinner warm and ready for him when he comes home late? Tomorrow you’re both going to Third-Round Knockout for several courses of dim-sum. He frequently brought home little snacks and trinkets he had picked up at some point during the day. Even when his partner scolded him about his spending habits. Marriage seemed like a distant prospect, but every time Gaming passed by Mingxing jewelry or ran into a newly-wed couple, the idea of seeing a ring on their hand grew ever more tantalizing. But they were young, and Gaming could hear his Nai Nai’s voice in the back of his head lecturing him on proper etiquette and timing.

XINGQIU

This boy has all of the set up to be an anime character, (and not just because he looks like Ciel from Black Butler) specifically a school slice-of-life. Son of a powerful family who prefers to practice the art of the sword and read than deal with his family’s business. And is another character that would forever have a crush on his childhood sweetheart. Only, he would remain oblivious to the true nature of his feelings until someone hit him over the head with the truth. Probably Chongyun. With his claymore. While Xingqiu was always raised with the expectation that he would marry a lady of high status in order to uphold his family’s honor, from what I’ve seen of him and his family I think they would be willing to look past that if Xingqiu was truly in love. Outside of his family’s expectations of what kind of person he should marry, Xingqiu would desperately want an SO who didn’t see his hobbies as a distraction from his duties, but as a part of him.

What Xingqiu didn’t know he wanted in an SO was someone practical. Someone who would make sure to have a stash of snacks hidden so whenever they managed to escape their handlers, they could hide for more than a few hours. Or paid off one of the managers of the bookhouse to set certain books aside to make sure Xingqiu never missed an issue of his favorite series. His favorite was when they had set up a picnic on a cliff adjoining Yujing Terrance with an entire dinner spread, cushions, and books for them to sneak off to when he was supposed to be attending a gala hosted by the Qingxing in the terrace below.  

His SO would most likely be a fellow bookworm that he met at the publishing house. Being one of the few people unattached from his family and their business Xingqiu often found himself sneaking out to spend as much time with them as possible. This evolved into him dragging them and Chongyun around on his little adventures around Liyue. As he grew up and came into greater conflicts involving his future place in the family, they would be his anchor. A steady rock that reminded Xingqiu of his best memories, and why he chose to study the Guhua Arts in the first place. He wanted to be able to protect them from anything. 

As mentioned previously, it would take a hot minute for Xingqiu to recognize the feelings he was experiencing were more than friendly. It's only after Chongyun flat out says to him that he talks about them more than anyone else and should ask them out that Xingqiu figures it out. Once Xingqiu does realize how much he loves them, you bet this chivalrous, manga-reading nerd would come up with the most romantic proposal (to ask them on a date) that you can possibly imagine. Flowers, chocolates, the sun going down in the background, the whole nine yards. 

If they accept his romantic proposal Xingqiu would immediately get down on one knee after, summon his sword, and swear an oath of fealty. Promising them his sword and servitude whenever they require it. Dates would vary depending on Xingiu and his SO’s mood; sometimes they would feel like taking advantage of the Feiyun’s reserved table at Xinyue Kiosk whenever they were too tired to plan something, they might meet up in the early hours of the morning to go to the docks and watch the fisherman unload their hauls while the sun paints Liyue Harbor in orange and gold, or is Xingqiu’s SO has some kind of training in a weapon or fighting, they might take the day to explore the routes around Liyue Harbor and kill any hilichurls or slimes that were straying too close to the main road. This would continue until both Xingqiu and his SO were adults, and both of their families began putting pressure on them to marry. After years of steady dating, marriage doesn’t seem like a daunting milestone or a grand occasion, because they are already fully committed to each other and have been for years. Their families spend months planning the marriage ceremony, inviting important officials and families from all over Teyvat, only for both of them to disappear halfway through the reception. The happy couple was found at Wanmin Restaurant the next morning, passed out at a table on top of each other with a book sitting half open in their laps.

[angels-fantasy]

Top Secret Fiction Ch. 6

The Confrontation

Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Description: After meeting the one and only pro hero Dynamight on a dating app, you two begin to see each other. Because of the dangers that come with his hero work, you both promise to be completely honest with each other from the beginning; though you can't help but keep one big secret from him.

You write fan fiction, mostly about him.

Chapter Details: deku makes an appearance here heheh. bakugou lowkey might like fanfics? but only if they're about him. scary confrontation 😟 reader is a bit sad and confused :(

Word Count: 1.4k

previous chapter

As soon as Bakugou got home, he opened his computer and looked up 'Bakugou x Reader'. What came up was a ton of links to different websites, one of the top ones being HeroFiction.Com.

Clicking on it, he scrolled through the sight and found many other original stories about different pro heroes.

While doing this, he learned that this was called fan fiction, which he'd heard about before, but he never paid attention to it because he didn't care.

Keeping the website open, he leaned back and wondered, were you writing fan fiction about him? You must've been, based on your notes. Did you write for other pro heroes, or just him?

A small part of him hoped you only wrote for him.

He sighed and rubbed his hands down his face, trying to think about what the hell he was going to do about this. Clearly, this was something you didn't want to tell him, meaning you kept it a secret.

And he hates secrets, but for some reason, this didn't feel too bad. He was almost... flattered, in a way. He was also curious and he just wanted to know more. But how would he even bring this up to you?

Deciding he'd need help with understanding this website, he called someone he trusted.

"Hey Deku. You know what fan fiction is, right?"

Blushing, Izuku replied with "Why are you asking me that Kacchan?!"

"Because I know you used to write that shit back in high school!" He explained, "Just tell me what you know about this site called 'HeroFiction.com.'"

A lightbulb went off in Izuku's head, "Oh yeah I recognize that name! It's basically a website for pro hero fanfiction. I've seen a few good ones actually-"

"Yeah okay, thanks." Katsuki said, cutting off his friend.

It was time for him to do more of his own research, specifically on this website.

...

When you woke up the next morning, you found yourself in your bed wondering how you got there.

Did I fall asleep? You wondered.

You cringed at the thought of Bakugou seeing you asleep and hoped you didn't do anything embarrassing.

Rubbing your eyes, you grabbed your phone from the nightstand and saw a text from Bakugou letting you know he had left after putting you in your bed.

You smiled at his thoughtfulness and texted him back a thank you, and an apology for falling asleep while he was over.

After tossing your phone down onto the bed next to you, you stretched and blinked away any leftover sleep.

As you were stretching your legs you felt your foot hit something softly. Wondering what it was, you sat up and looked at the foot of your bed, eyes widening when you realized it was your notebook.

But this wasn't just any notebook- this one had all of your notes for fics you were planning on writing.

You thought about how Bakugou brought you into your bedroom, and your heart sank to your stomach when you realized he probably saw your notebook.

"Noooo!" You cried and placed your hands over your eyes. "Kill me now..."

You prayed to any higher power out there that he didn't read anything.

...

Your prayers clearly didn't reach anyone because a few hours after waking up, you got a text from Bakugou that said, "Can we talk? ASAP."

Biting your nail nervously, you texted back "Sure" and asked when and where he'd want to meet up.

Quickly texting back, he told you he'd meet you at a cafe near your neighborhood in a few hours.

A little while later as you got ready to meet up with him you felt like you were going to cough up your stomach and die from your nerves.

You didn't want to accept it, but deep down you knew he figured out your secret. It was already terrifying trying to keep what you did in your free time a secret, but now that the person you wrote about knew, was even more terrifying!

It seemed as though your frantic thoughts made time go by even faster than usual, and it was now time for you to leave so you could make it to the cafe on time.

Taking a deep breath and patting your face, you stepped out of your apartment and began to head to the cafe.

...

As Bakugou sat at the cafe in the outdoor dining area, he tapped his foot anxiously as he awaited your arrival.

After his phone call with Deku and doing his own research (which just consisted of reading other fan fictions he came across), he came to the conclusion that he would accept this hobby of yours, if you were honest about it when he confronted you.

Since he had browsed the website a bit, he came across some stories that were actually decent (but also others that were very, very questionable and he really hoped you didn't write anything like that. ESPECIALLY not a story with him and that damn Deku).

He'd never admit it, but it boosted his ego a bit to know that you wrote about him, and he definitely wanted to read some of your stuff. He wanted to know if it was as good as some of the other ones he has read.

Suddenly, he saw your figure walking towards him and he was snapped out of his thoughts. He sat up straighter and placed his elbows against the table, leaning forward.

You sat down across from him silently with a shy look on your face. "So..." You said softly, "You wanted to talk?"

He cleared his throat, "Yeah. I'll just get to the point..." He said, before hesitating to say, "That night I was at your place, I saw your notebook-"

You grimaced, knowing exactly what he was talking about, and placed your hands over your face in embarrassment. "I'm sorry." You said.

Letting out a deep breath, you uncovered your face and continued to speak while looking down at your lap. "I knew this would come up eventually, I just didn't think it'd be so soon..."

Bakugou scoffed, "So when were you gonna tell me? Never?"

You frowned at his tone, "No! It's just not an easy topic to talk about Bakugou. It's embarrassing and I wasn't just going to say 'Hey Bakugou, did you know I've been writing fan fiction about you for three years?'"

He blinked. He could understand where you were coming from. In fact, he'd probably be more weirded out if you had told him that easily. But, even though you were honest now, it still doesn't shake his uneasiness about you keeping a secret from him.

Sure, it wasn't a huge, life threatening secret, but it was still something you kept from him. He liked honesty, especially in a relationship and it's something he valued heavily. A part of him felt like he should've known about this sooner, since it was about him for gods sake!

He sighed. "Before you go assuming things, I'm not mad at ya, okay?" He said, "I just... I think I need time to think about this alright? A few days at most."

You furrowed your eyebrows subconsciously, making your eyes look big and puppy like. Well damn, how was he supposed to stay away from you when you gave him that look?

"Okay." You spoke sadly, "I understand. I shouldn't have kept that from you, so again, I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "'S fine."

You rubbed your sweaty palms on your legs and stood up. "I'll give you time now, alright? Just, call or text me whenever you're ready." You said and gave him a small wave before walking back in the direction you came from.

As you made your way back, you thought about your talk with Bakugou.

If you wanted to keep seeing him, maybe you would have to stop writing. You were starting to really like Bakugou, and you didn't want a silly hobby to get in the way of a potentially serious relationship with him.

You felt your eyes tear up. It was hard to think about giving up writing. You had made friends through your writing, your own little community online. It was great! But realistically, could you keep this up forever?

That same night, you posted on your page.

Hi everyone. I've decided to take a break from writing for a while. I'm not sure how long it will be, but I will still leave everything here for you to read.

Thank you, xo.

authors note

HIII omg im so sorry i haven't updated this fic in a while 🥹 this chapter was actually really fun to write and omg writing readers thoughts at the end lowkey made me sad!! how do you feel about it? pls lmk!!

love ya!

tag list: @doumadono @54fangirl @andysdrafts @dagger-dragger @lovra974 @l4rsun1vrrse @emmab3mma @littlkittenfan @tatiquichi @cloudxluv @seonne @shonen-brainrot @the2ndl @gold24fish @cxp1d @rv19 @gina329

(those in pink couldn't be tagged)

[dearggntlereader]

2nd: Gingerbread House ༻¨ : ·.. ｡⋆⍋*｡

Remus Lupin x reader CW: flustered Remus Lupin, kissing (?)

Remus always thought himself quite talented at charms. Well, maybe not talented like Sirius but he always made sure to balance that out with his excessive research and careful execution.

He always excelled at simple and more complicated charms in and out of the classroom, which caused him to assume some simple swings of his wand would make your and his baking date a bit more exciting for you.

And maybe he got a bit too cocky, trying to impress you, even when he knew very well that you did not need him to. Still, it’s your first date and he had been assured by his mates that he should put in some effort.

He had it all planned out.

Lumos Vitrum for softly glowing windows.

Fumos Dolcis for sugar like smoke coming from the chimney.

Scintillae Dulcia for sparkling and shimmering candy decorations.

Ambulocibus Dulcis to make the gingerbread man do a little dance with his gingerbread-wife.

And lastly, Nixus Placida for a gentle snowfall of powdered sugar.

All very easy but impressive charms. Remus would usually be able to perform them perfectly at 3am, high on 3 cups of coffees and sleep deprived.

He felt like James, fumbling any easy task in front of Regulus, as he tried to give the house some extra magical charm.

The structure of the house was finished already and you were looking at him all smiley and excited, pressing your lips to his every few minutes.

Your first kiss had been a few days prior but the prickly, excited feeling in his stomach had faded no more, now.

The glow in your bright eyes had reminded him of the first charm. He took out his charm with your soft eyes locked onto him and thighs pressed close to his.

Right before he was about to start the movement with his wand you pressed a long kiss on his upper cheek, right on his deepest scar. Your lips were warm and soft, loving as they pressed onto his skin.

The heat that took to his face will not be mentioned.

He blinked hard before focusing back onto the house. “Lumos Vitrum,” he whispered, his voice cracking the tiniest bit at the last second.

The windows started shining softly and your light gasp brought a smile to his face. He looked at you to drink in your lovely reaction, not realizing that the windows were flickering a bit every time his heartbeat heightened slightly from looking at you.

That’s really where it started getting out of order.

You were being so incredibly sweet, kissing him long and gentle. “This is so sweet, Remmy.” you muttered, the words lost in the kiss.

“It’s not a complicated charm,” Remus explained, still slightly panting from the kiss.

“Still, it’s cute.”

Another kiss.

At that point he just had to continue, wanting to bring that light of excitement to your eyes again.

Except, the sugar smoke ended up more like big cotton candy clouds looming over you two.

But, they made you laugh and you leaned closer to him. So really, it was a success.

Then, the candy started actually throwing sparks at you and the little gingerbread man simply stood up and walked away while his now ex-wife started destroying the house.

“God, they’re divorced.” you laughed, bumping his shoulder as he looked at the mess in shock. What did he do wrong?

You look at him with a humorous glint in your eyes. “Let’s hope that’s not a bad omen for our relationship.”

"Well, I suppose we can rule out a career in magical pastry arts for me," he muttered, waving his wand to tame the rogue gingerbread man, which had stubbornly marched in circles like it had somewhere very important to be. 

"Maybe they just have a dramatic flair for storytelling. Every great gingerbread house needs a subplot, right?"

You burst out laughing at that, Remus’ slight embarrassment and dry tone sending you over the edge.

He couldn’t help but smile, the sound of your laughter cutting through his flustered state.

You giggled as you calmed down, looking at him again. “Who doesn’t love a good subplot?”

Another kiss.

Thank you all for supporting my blog!! As always, I appreciate all comments and reblogs. It's what keeps me going.

requests

[anthonys237thfreckle]

i need need need headcanons for anthony with a gf who’s like got a career in STEM and she’s super smart and as an actor he’s amazed by her lmao.

this is so cute! thanks anon

I’m looking for a woman in STEM - Anthony Ramos x F! Reader

prompt: headcanons for Anthony who’s girlfriend is in STEM - i’ve picked biomed for a degree since my mom wanted me to do biomed in high school

TW: mentions of academic stress and panic attacks, mention of drugs used in medicine, mention of mental illness

🔬 when you both first met, and he first asked for where you graduated from, let me tell you - mans did NOT expect you to say ‘Cambridge’

🔬 ‘Oh, so like Cambridge College in Massachusetts?’

🔬 This man omg

🔬 When you said ‘No, England’ he felt goosebumps cause like ‘geez louise CAMBRIDGE?’ and when you casually said you did biomed he was like ‘wait what-’

🔬 ‘Me? Oh, I did Musical Theatre’ he says matter of factly, and you’d add ‘Oh, I played piano when I was in elementary-’

🔬 You’d be the definition of a perfect golden child. He knows that couldn’t have been easy

🔬 When you two do start dating, he’s always bragging ‘Oh my girlfriend does lab research for this new supplement for this drug for schizophrenia in children-’ HE’S A PRO YAPPER. Especially in interviews.

🔬 He’s so proud of everything you’ve done - doing medicinal research at NYMC (New York Medical College)

🔬 Maybe in the winter as you two are baking (you always make sure the measurements are perfect, never letting him measure anything out lol) he always says baking is an ‘art’

🔬 ‘Actually babe, it’s chemistry’ you’d chuckle, taking a bite out of some gingerbread cookies, and ever since, he’s jokingly kept a lab coat and goggles and chides you for ‘not tying your hair in the lab’.

🔬 You’d tell him about how hard high school and college was for you, having to get a scholarship, going to British private schools because the medicine industry is mad competitive and honestly, you need to show something off in your application.

🔬 You’d tell him how even though you did Cambridge IGCSE and A level courses all throughout high school, it was no match for what England had in store for you - panic attacks became a weekly thing.

🔬 I mean, you did Pure Math, Biology, Chemistry and Psychology A and AS levels for gods sake - its an absolute mindfuck.

🔬 He’s always there to reassure her how smart she is and that she’s human no matter what - that college is over, and the drug trials will end up great, and a bunch of kids will get some damn good medication.

🔬 He LOVES it when you come watch his shows and movies. It means the absolute world to him.

🔬 Soon, he kind of drifted away from theatre after Hamilton, and started in film, and would always get super excited whenever he’d get some remotely science-y role.

🔬 Like in In Treatment, he’d come to you for help for some advice on his role, on some deeper level analysis (not as deep as an actual therapist guys, just a psych student level) and you’d be squealing with pride when you see him on TV.

🔬 And when he got into the more Sci-Fi movies like Transformers, he’d tell you ‘it’s not that deep, baby.’ whenever he’d catch your brows furrow in confusion at the misuse of a niche scientific term

🔬 He’d be so happy when he landed Twisters, even though you weren’t a meteorology student, your use of organic chemistry would def have some revelations when watching Kate use some form of polycarbonate.

🔬 ‘they’re right! they use silver iodide for cloud seeding!” you’d giggle.

🔬 affectionately calls you ‘nerd’ all the time.

— for anyone not british, igcse is from grades 9-10 and a levels are a bit like AP! but like they have a lot of depth. you’re not expected to do more than three.

[octuscle]

Hey, support! So I’m Gus and there’s this really handsome muscle daddy at this marine research center I work at and I want to get him to notice me. He’s really into beefy, well-dressed himbos with nice facial hair and big pecs. Could you help me out please? I don’t want to be too dumb cuz I really want to keep this job, but you can change me however else within what would be his type.

Chronivac is currently experiencing a few technical problems. But I've heard about this tanning salon. “Magic sunbed”. Ask for sunbed 2. 20 minutes should be enough. Definitely no more. Otherwise I can't guarantee anything.

Bekim has had a shit day so far. The turnover isn't right, his boss has given him a telling off. You're only the second customer. He greets you like an old friend. Couch 2 is free. Special offer for today only and for new customers: 30 minutes for a surcharge of just 10 percent and the special lotion at half price. Bekim explains that 20 minutes is basically useless. The skin only tans after 20 minutes. A lot helps a lot, you think. You've never been to a tanning salon before. The staff will know what they're doing.

You go into cabin 2, strip off and rub yourself with lotion. The lotion stinks. You look for an expiration date. Obviously still good for over a year. Then the smell of musk, sweat and sperm must be… Should you leave your underpants on now? Or take them off? To be on the safe side, you undress completely and lie down on the couch. You look for a switch to start the process. You are struck by lightning. It gets light, it gets warm. You close your eyes and try to sleep.

Sleep is out of the question. It's so hot. You're lying in a puddle of sweat. And the stench of the lotion is getting worse. So more intense… You don't actually find it bad any more. More like… Exciting. Your cock is getting hard. You start to wank. Your colleague from the lab in front of you. You can literally feel him running his fingers through your beard and pulling down your dungarees to suck your nipples on your monstrous pecs… Wait a minute! Dungarees? No, lab coat. Right? Never mind, your cock is almost bumping into the top shell of the tanning bed. Your balls are bursting. And then you shoot a geyser out of your cock. A fountain forms three or four times. And soon you're lying in a puddle of sweat and cum. Shit, you could have saved yourself the lotion…

The tanning process ends as abruptly as it started. Cold and dark. The upper bowl slowly rises. Shit, there's only the towel, which is far too small as always. But where are your things? “Yo, Bekim, where the heck are my clothes at?” you shout. Bekim knocks and brings you your dungarees, jockstrap, socks and work boots. The submissive pig couldn't resist wearing your clothes. You noticed he had a crush on you months ago when he started working here. You were one of his first customers. And then you became a regular customer. Shit, he was so excited, he did everything wrong. Well, today he's one of the old hands here. And somehow a buddy of yours. As long as the clothes are neatly laid out and not full of wax, it's okay if he lives out his fetish during your tanning session. Bekim wants to suck you off as a thank you. “Next time, Buddy,” you say. You have to go back to the lab. Your pager has already beeped four times. Some damn ventilation system isn't working as it should.

Bekim is like, the top dude of all time. He's not just about making sure your tanning bed is always ready for your regular sessions. He also hooks you up with the good stuff so your biceps stay swole and your nuts stay juiced. That's how the guy at the Marine Research Center where you work likes it. He's a real muscle daddy. And he's into his dumb janitor hoe.

[thebisexualdogdad]

fic where Maddy Perez falls for East highlands resident bad boy and they hook up after a group project

Maddy Perez x Male!reader

Maddy certainly wasn't the only person in school to have a thing for you, in fact you had already made your way through most of the cheerleading squad but unlike them Maddy refused to let you know she was insanely attracted to you.

"Looking good Perez, when are you going to let me take you out," you asked her one day in history class when she was wearing her cheer uniform for that night's football game.

"Never gonna happen Y/N," she said rolling her eyes but really she was imagining how good your head would look underneath her skirt.

Then there was that time at a party when you surprised everyone by actually showing up.

"What are you doing here? Don't you prefer getting drunk on cheap beer behind the liquor store," Maddy jokes, finding you in the kitchen as you start drinking some very expensive whisky directly from the bottle.

"Maybe I just wanted to see you," you say, offering her the whisky, "you look hot by the way."

Maddy quickly grabs the bottle and chugs some of it hoping to hide the blush forming on her cheeks, "too bad I'm not interested in letting you get in my pants but I'm sure you'll find someone else to get lucky with."

"You're breaking my heart Perez," you say playfully.

"Didn't know you had one," she cracks.

"If you ever let me take you out on that date you'd see there's more to me than just being a devilishly handsome bad boy," you say leaning in close to her.

Maddy gulps, taking another swig of whisky to stop herself from fucking you right there on that counter.

You and Maddy continued this game until you eventually got partnered up for a history project.

How the hell was she going to retain her self control and not jump your bones when you were going to be spending so much time together alone in her bedroom.

Well technically you could have done this project at the library but Maddy was horny and thinking with her pussy, not her brain.

So here you are, in her room on day three of working on your project with Maddy looking at you like a four course meal after you drove her home on your motorcycle.

Her body was still humming from the vibrations and holding onto you so tightly.

"Maddy? Earth to Maddy," you laugh, snapping her out of her trance, "I think we've got enough research notes to start working on the essay."

"Yeah, right, let me get my laptop," she says, taking a seat at her desk and turning her laptop on.

You grab the small ottoman she uses at her vanity mirror and take a seat next to her, a little too close for Maddy to stay focused on the essay.

"You want me to type? You seem to be making a lot of typos there Perez," you laugh.

Maddy pushes the laptop in front of you and stands from her chair, "I need some water do you want anything?"

"Vodka would be nice," you grin.

"I'll get you a soda," she says before leaving her bedroom.

When she returns her glass of water is nearly empty from her trying to cool herself down and she hands you the soda.

You crack it open and take a drink, setting it on the desk as you keep working.

"Can you hand me the textbook, there's something I want to look up," you ask a few minutes later and when she grabs the book she knocks your dark soda over and it spills right onto your white shirt.

"Oh shit I'm so sorry," she says running to her bathroom to grab a towel to clean up her desk.

But when she steps out of her bathroom you're standing there shirtless.

"Mind if I wash this in your sink? Its sticky and I don't want it to stain," You ask.

"Uh, yeah, yeah that's fine," she says, glazing over your abs as you walk past her to her bathroom.

She cleans up the soda and hears the water running in the bathroom, she has to get it together.

She sits on the edge of her bed and puts her head in her hands, how the hell did you have this much of an affect on her.

"Hey it's okay, it's just a shirt," you chuckle when you come back into her room.

You left your shirt hanging in the bathroom to dry and now there's some stray water droplets running down your stomach.

Fuck.

You walk over to her and Maddy can't fight the urges anymore, her hands go to your neck and she pulls you down into an intense kiss.

"Woah, Maddy," you say in surprise, pulling away from her.

"You've been hitting on me since the sixth grade, you really don't want this?" She scoffs.

"I want this more than you know, I just want to make sure you want this," you say.

"I want this Y/N, I really want this," she says bringing you back in for another kiss.

You sink down to your knees in front of her, kissing down her neck and playing with the hem of her shirt.

"Take it off," she orders and in seconds her shirt is gone.

You keep kissing down her body until you reach the top of her jeans.

You look up at her and she nods her consent before raising her hips in the air so you could tug her jeans down her legs.

"God you're beautiful Maddy," you say, kissing along her thighs, "and so wet already."

"I hate that you turn me on this much," she groans right as your tongue licks her through her panties.

"If you want me to stop just tell me to," you say.

"Don't you fucking dare stop," she says sternly and you smile, pulling her panties to the side and tasting her directly.

You moan and Maddy feels it deep in the pit of her stomach, your tongue working her in ways no other guy ever had before.

One her of legs goes over your shoulder, giving you better access.

Her arousal drips down your chin and you slip a finger inside with ease, Maddy moaning above you.

A second finger enters her and you pump them slowly, using your other hand to pull the hood of her clit back and suck it between your lips.

"Holy shit," Maddy cries out, she had been holding this in for so long she can't even feel embarrassed about how quickly she came because it felt so fucking good.

"Damn Perez, I wasn't even down there for a full five minutes," you say cockily.

"Shut up and fuck me Y/N," she demands and you happily stand up, dropping your jeans to reveal the massive boner poking through your boxers.

"You got any condoms?" You ask, stroking yourself through your boxers which only turns her on more.

"Top left drawer in my bathroom," she says.

You go to her bathroom again and find the box of condoms, grabbing one and when you return her bra and panties are gone, leaving her completely naked and now in the center of her bed.

"Have I told you how beautiful you are?" You say, letting your boxers join the rest of your clothes on the floor and putting the condom on.

"Didn't I tell you to fuck me already?" Maddy states and you smirk, joining her in bed.

You settle on top of her, kissing her and she moans at the taste of herself on your tongue.

Reaching down you tease her with the tip of your cock, lathering it with her arousal before easing it inside.

Maddy clearly doesn't want to wait any longer so you quickly rock your hips in a steady rhythm.

Her nails dig into your back, her bed creaking underneath you.

You suck harshly at her neck, one of your hands going to play with her chest.

Maddy moans loudly when you roll one of her nipples between your fingers, legs wrapping around your waist so you can hit deeper inside her.

"Oh fuck me, right there, right there," she chants.

Once again it doesn't take long for her to cum, this one hitting her even harder than the first.

"Do you want me to pull out?" You ask her, slowing your movements giving her a few aftershocks.

"No, keep going until you cum," she says, grabbing your ass.

You smirk and pick your pace back up, she's squeezing your ass and within another minute you're cumming inside her.

"Fuck Maddy," you grunt, your hips moving more frantically through your release.

"That felt so fucking good," she says, groaning when you pull out of her and feeling so empty.

You roll over next to her, taking the condom off and throwing it in the trash next to her bed.

"So does this mean you're finally gonna let me take you on a date?" You tease.

"I'll tell you what Y/N, if we get an A on this project, I'll go on a date with you," she replies.

"You got yourself a deal," you smile, "now let's get back to work, we have an essay to write."

"Have you ever worked this hard on an assignment before?" She jokes.

"Nope but sex is an excellent motivation and it'll be even better at the end of it because I'm going to take you on the best date of your life."

[piratefishmama]

Finders Givers | Prompted by @aellafreya

Curiosity.

Some may call it a dangerous thing. Some may argue for its ability to lead you to the truth of things. Some may claim it leads you to temptation, to regret, to suffering.

Steve Harrington, was curious.

He’d found the source of his curiosity while visiting a bar he’d planned on purchasing. It wasn’t a huge establishment. Or a well known one. Not exactly big bucks in the making but it was sat in a prime location atop a cellar that led to miles of underground tunnels which frankly.

He wanted.

He wanted them and not for legal reasons either. The tunnels weren’t on any official city map, predating them, Robin and Nancy, his right hand, and his researcher, found them by pure chance while on a fun little jaunt through the local libraries.

Fun being a stretch for Robin, but she needed to hang out with another woman her own age. And so did Nancy.

But he wanted those tunnels, they stretched all over the damn city, with just a little bit of work they could pop up anywhere, perfect for many a less than legal activity.

So many by-chance happenings had led him to that ratty little bi-fold leather wallet. Wasn’t even quality leather either. It looked old too, black with an embossed devil head pattern that probably came from some truck stop somewhere.

He could have just handed it in to the owner he was trying to buy out, could have even thrown it away, but curiosity was a devil sometimes. So there he was, sat down at one of the many tables in that little bar while one of his people did the majority of his work for him (honestly what’s the point of having people if they cant do your work for you?) perusing the contents and feeling more and more depressed by the second.

First, there was a wad of coupons and a single quarter in there instead of bills, which was never a good sign.

Second, a single, solitary, sad, badly rolled little joint.

Third. A single bank card with Mr E J Munson on it. Not even a credit card, just. A debit. Which statistically didn’t mean great things about this person’s credit score. Could just mean the owner was trying to avoid debt, but… doubtful.

Fourth, a stick of gum.

Fifth, a guitar pick.

Sixth, a library card, oof couldn’t even afford to buy the books.

An expired driver’s license desperately in need of renewal registered to Edward Joseph Munson, the photo made him look like he’d just gotten out of jail or some shit, his hair a terrible buzzcut and eyes too big, too dark, and too haunted to be anything else, but then that was just sometimes how those photos turned out. He could have been a totally innocent man!

It had his address on it, a few descriptors, height half an inch shorter than Steve himself, brown hair, brown eyes, male, 140lbs at point of issue (he’d been seventeen), date of issue, issuing State, along with a date of birth, clocking him at a year older than Steve, twenty nine, and… that he was apparently a donor.

And finally, a month old pay stub from a local fast food joint. So minimum wage worker at best.

It was… kind of sad really. Steve actually looked up the address on his phone, just for curiosities sake, because he was already in deep enough to look through a guy’s wallet, might as well google the poor saps address, just in case he felt charitable enough to drop it off on the way back to the high rise.

Oh there was that deep sadness some people might yell ‘I told you so’ about.

It wasn’t bad. But it sure as shit wasn’t good either. Steve knew of at least six bottom dweller drug dealers that operated out of that block, which explained the joint.

And also made him sadder about the joint, the weed probably wasn’t even all that good.

“Hey Robbie?” His long time friend and platonic soulmate turned her bored gaze over to him, she’d been playing angry birds on her phone, he could hear the war cries of those birds every time she launched one. “We done any charity this quarter?”

“Mmmmmnmnnnnoooooo?” It always looked good to the public for a rich guy like him to do charity work. Wouldn’t look too deeply into him if he was seen publicly doing good. “Unless you count telling Dustin to go wild in that nerd shop last week as ‘charity’, your child nearly emptied the damn shop.”

“Nah that was his birthday present, can’t call that charity.” He wasn’t going to reiterate that Dustin wasn’t his child. He was basically mom at that point.

“Alright, so what’re you thinking?” She sat up, turning to face him properly, putting her phone screen down on the table “Sponsoring something? A drive? There’s this cute little animal shelter in Japan called HEART I read about last month, ran by just a woman and her husband working with volunteers, could be a good thing to donate to? Helping animals is always good for PR.”

“…Those sound way better than what I was thinking, this guy’s wallet is bumming me out.” The expression on her face could have probably put grumpy cat to shame. “Pick one of your choices and do something with it, whichever you want. Imma do something about this wallet.” It didn’t have to be a big PR stunt, the fact that he was doing it on the DL as well? It always came back around all sunshine and roses because people believed it was totally selfless.

Didn’t do it for PR, couldn’t be doing it for PR, he hadn’t announced it.

It was always for PR. Always. The reaction just took a little longer to circulate and people were suckers.

“Just give it back to him? That should be charity enough. It’s like nine bucks to replace a driver’s license, you’re saving him nine bucks. Charity.”

“For someone who started out poor, you’re awful, Robin Buckley. Deal with this bar thing for me would you? I’m going to go on an adventure.” Curiosity was a powerful thing!

“Alright but if you come home with another stray I’m suing!”

“That was—”

“Seven times Steve! Seven!!” It wasn’t his fault that he struggled to see teenagers down on their luck. And four of them were two sets of siblings so it technically counted as one time per set, and one came with Nancy so—!

“Fine!” –So, he wouldn’t argue.

Empires weren’t built with throw away people who held no loyalty to you although he did have many of those on staff. Empires like his were built on the foundation of family, and while the one he’d grown up with was a little bit lacklustre, the one he’d built was perfect.

So he wouldn’t argue, he knew she loved them just as much as he did, in her own way, and that any additions would be welcomed with open arms.

—

Steve didn’t take the car. Although he probably should have, he knew at least three of his people would be following him, keeping an eye on him for safety reasons. At a distance of course but they’d be tailing him for the sake of safety.

That neighbourhood wasn’t safe. No matter if he had a weapon on him or not, it wasn’t safe for people like him.

People with visible wealth.

The watch on his wrist alone was probably worth more than some of the buildings in that neighbourhood, and it wasn’t exactly early in the day either. The sun setting made for an excellent ‘rich person in the wrong goddamn neighbourhood’ future police report.

But he made it to his destination unscathed.

The fast food joint from that pay stub. He even double checked the address on it. The chances of this Edward Munson being there were low, but that was fine, he just wanted to check it out. The atmosphere in there, the management styles, he’d hang out in the corner, get a cheap coffee and people watch for a while. See how fun Edward's work life was so he could add it to his decision making tree.

Curiosity really was one depressing little bitch baby.

The manager on staff was loud. Rude. Sexist. And he was pretty sure he’d made one of the staff cry because she’d hurried out very quickly rubbing at her face and sniffling. The temptation to put out a hit on him? High. But no, that was a lot for one asshole… maybe he’d just send Jane out, let the kid take his knees out.

She deserved a little bastard ba—

Someone beat him to it. A commotion later started by someone with a lot of hair, hair that’d been put up in a net and half hidden beneath the uniform’s god awful mustard yellow cap. It’d been two hits, the guy hitting him, and the manager hitting the floor, blood pouring from a very broken nose, spectacular.

The rest of the staff looked on in wide eyed horror, one yelping “Eddie, holy shit!” as the man pulled his cap off to reveal all that hair. “You’re so fired!”

“Didn’t need this shit show anyway! Chris an I quit, peace out assholes!!” Eddie. Eddie. Steve rose to his feet. Godawful coffee forgotten in the face of the mystery Edward, who caught his eye once before continuing on his way, all big brown frankly beautiful Bambi eyes, less haunted but still so big, full, kissable lips, and god, so much hair, going in the same direction as the blonde who’d disappeared to probably go and cry.

Eddie did need that job. He really needed that job. Steve had seen the state of his wallet. He needed that job, or at least he needed the paycheque that came from that job. Couldn’t even afford to buy his own books! He rented them, he rented books.

Jesus.

God, Robin was gonna judge him so bad for the person he was about to become.

Part 2

[slutforsilverfoxes]

Sleight of Hand

[A/N: I DID IT! I finished my Steve x reader undercover op fic, and I kind of love it??? I hope those of you who were looking forward to it enjoy it too 😈🖤 Thank you to everyone who encouraged me to write this as a full blown fic! Over 5.7k words hehe whoops]

—————

When your former mentor had contacted you about an opening at her coral reef research lab, moving from Camden to Oahu had been a no brainer. You’d packed up your life in New Jersey and been on a plane to the Aloha State within a week. Your favorite cousin, who’s truthfully more like the big brother you always wanted, had been elated to hear the news, welcoming you at the airport with open arms and two simple rules.

“Always answer the phone when I call so you don’t worry me to death,” Danny had said, holding up one finger, “and two,” he added a second, “you’re an adult and you can date anyone on this island-”

“Thank… you?”

“-but stay away from this schmuck.”

The schmuck in question had simply rolled his eyes, draped a beautiful lei around your neck, and greeted you with a warm hug. “It’s nice to finally meet you. I’m Steve.”

Your confident promise to your cousin had been broken a whopping two months later- and no, you hadn’t ignored one of his phone calls.

“Did you get me a beer?” you ask with a teasing lilt to your voice, wringing out your wet hair before dropping down onto the bench beside your boyfriend. A quick glance around reveals that Danny’s over by the shrimp truck with Kamekona, and you lean forward to steal a kiss before putting some space between yourself and your favorite brunette.

“I surely did not,” Steve sasses back and takes a swig of his ice cold beverage. “Alcohol and diving do not mix. But I did happen to get a mango smoothie from that one place down the road this pretty girl I know really likes.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Mhm,” he responds, a goofy grin spreading across his handsome face. “But, uh, she didn’t show, so I guess you can have it.”

You laugh and give him a playful shove, then let out a content hum as you pop the straw through the lid and take a grateful sip. “So good,” you moan in delight, and Steve has to bite his lip to refrain from making a comment when he spots Danny approaching the table with your regular orders.

“Hey, you.” Your cousin greets you with a kiss on the cheek before taking up residence on the bench across from you and Steve. “Why’re you sitting all the way over there, huh? You like that clown better or somethin’?”

“This guy?” you snort, taking your lunch off the tray and rifling through the napkins in search of a fork.

“Ouch.” Steve winces as if burned by your comment, and you surreptitiously squeeze his thigh beneath the table.

“So tell me about this case you’ve got,” you coax your cousin to change the subject, spearing some grilled veggies on the plastic fork’s tines and scooping up a respectable mound of rice on top.

“So there’s a diamond smuggling ring-” Danny starts, and you immediately cut him off with, “Shut up, that doesn’t happen in real life.” You turn to Steve for confirmation, but there’s no provocative arch to his eyebrow or twitching of his lips to suggest this is a joke. “Are you serious right now? BFFR, Danno.”

“I don’t- I don’t know what that means. Why are you making me feel old?”

“Be fucking for real,” you and Steve supply in unison, and you smile proudly at him. “You’re learning!”

“Between you and Gracie, I keep up, okay?”

“Oh, between my baby cousin and my daughter, you- okay, that’s excellent,” Danny proclaims, his tone indicating it’s anything but. “Anyway, they’re using poker games as a cover to uh, collect their product, shall we say.”

“There’s enough rich people on Oahu with actual diamonds?” you ask, incredulous. “And here I am working like a pleb for paper currency.”

“Word,” Steve seconds your statement, raising his beer in a toast. You clink your smoothie against it before taking another refreshing sip and asking, “So how’re you gonna catch them?”

“Well, there’s a high roller tournament on Friday night that we’re betting they’ll hit. We wanted to go in undercover and flush them out but…” Steve trails off and gazes at you thoughtfully, but Danny’s shaking his head before the words have even formed on the brunette’s lips.

“No, absolutely not. Don’t even think about it, Steve.”

“What?” You turn to him, excitement coursing through your veins at the way his eyes have lit up. “Think about it! And tell me what you’re thinking about.”

“You could go undercover with me to the tournament, help me gather some intel. Maybe we get you to confirm the diamonds are actually in their possession and-”

“No!” Danny chimes in again. “What’s the matter with you, huh? These guys have killed two people, Steve. It’s too dangerous for her.”

“First off, fuck that-”

“Language.”

With an eye roll, you amend, “Forget that. More importantly, shouldn’t Danny go undercover? You kind of suck at poker, Steve.” You feel a sharp pinch at your side and you yelp in protest, slapping at the Navy SEAL. “It’s true, you little-”

“You’re not going,” Danny says definitively. “What about Tani?”

Steve shakes his head. “Tani and Junior have already questioned two of the men involved. They’ll be made before they even get to the table.”

You cross your arms and level your cousin with a smirk. “Sounds like you need me, Danno.”

“Then I’m going with you,” he declares.

“Yeah, no, hard pass,” you backpedal. “Even as a former thespian, there’s no way I can convincingly play arm candy for you without it being weird.”

“So, it’s settled then, little Williams,” Steve says with a grin. “You and me. Friday night. The high roller table at the Ilikai Hotel.”

__________

“This whole affair is giving very much Ocean’s Thirteen,” you remark as you lean into the mirror to line your puckered lips with Devil’s Den red. “The diamond heist, the poker game… it’s all so exciting.”

“Except this isn’t Hollywood and a bullet will actually hurt,” your cousin ever so graciously reminds you, trying to tug the slit ends of your dress together and then grunting in displeasure when the action reveals more of your bare back. “You’ve gotta be kidding me with this dress, babe,” he tuts. “Why’s it so expensive if it’s missing half the fabric, huh?”

You shrug and answer with a smile, “Don’t ask me! Your buddy picked it out.”

“Oh yeah, I bet he did,” Danny grumbles under his breath. “I mean, you’d be the most beautiful woman in the room if you were wearing a paper bag, but this- this dress-”

“Danno,” you laugh, completing the finishing touches on your makeup before turning around to squeeze his shoulder. “Remember one of the first things you said to me when I stepped off the plane?”

“Don’t date Steve?” he offers hopefully with a grimace.

That ship has sailed and it’s not docking anytime soon, you think wryly. “No, you goofball,” you respond instead, “that I’m an adult. Everything’s going to be fine!”

“Alright, okay, but just- just promise me you’ll be smart tonight and play it safe.”

With three fingers held aloft, you answer solemnly, “I promise.”

“And don’t let Steve talk you into doing something stupid, okay? No honeypot insanity or trying to sneak into rooms or anything, you got it?”

You press your lips to your cousin’s cheek and then wipe away the smudged lipstick. “Relax, Danny. The man’s a former SEAL. What could possibly go wrong?”

You open the door of the en-suite bathroom with a small smirk tugging at your lips as Danny splutters on behind you in answer to your incendiary question.

As soon as your stiletto touches down on the carpeted floor of the luxury hotel room, you’re hit with an enthusiastic, “Woah, baby!”

“You like?” you ask with a grin, holding your arms out at your sides and giving Tani a spin to show off the dress.

Tani laughs appreciatively and lets out a low whistle. “You are smokin’ hot. I am looking… disrespectfully,” she concludes after pretending to mull over her word choice. She sneaks a glance over at her boss who’s trying and failing to draw his gaze away from the high slit that’s showing off a majority of your leg, then steps closer to you and drops her voice. “And I’m not the only one.” You shush your friend quickly and she ducks away from your playful smack with another peal of laughter.

“Wow,” Steve breathes out, practically sporting heart-eyes as he drinks in the black silk hugging every curve of your body. His piercing blue eyes blaze a trail of heat from the stilettos on your feet to the low bun your hair is swept into, and you feel your skin grow warm under his attention.

“You look pretty wow yourself,” you remark, appreciating the smart tux he’s donned, the perfectly tailored suit accenting every defined muscle on his powerful body. The blush on your face deepens when your gaze meets his, catching a glimpse of a hungry predator on the prowl.

“No, but you, Y/N,” Steve counters, his voice a low growl, “you just- I mean- wow.” He looks ready to pounce, and you’re positive he would forego the event in lieu of spending the evening in bed if there wasn’t a case riding on your performance tonight- and your cousin who you’re keeping your relationship a secret from less than a foot away.

Danny snaps in his face, directing the brunette’s attention to him. “Don’t you gawk at her like that. Paws off my baby cousin, you hear me? Better use the right head tonight, Steven, I swear.”

You dart your eyes over to your boyfriend and make an intentionally obscene gesture with your hands, indicating which head you’re thinking about. He covers up his laugh with a cough, then hurries to reassure his partner. “Danno, c’mon. I’m a perfect gentleman. Aren’t I, Y/N?”

“You’re an animal, is what you are,” your beloved cousin continues his tirade, answering for you. “Just remember I’m watching, huh? I’ve got eyes on all the cameras.”

“Alright, people, focus now,” Lou admonishes gently, handing you and Steve small communications devices that you fit snugly into your ear, out of plain sight. “Y’all remember the plan?”

“Stand there and look pretty. Don’t get shot at,” you dutifully list off your objectives for the op with an exaggerated waggling of your eyebrows while Steve tests the microphone tucked away in his bow tie. “As an unofficial member of Five-0 now, do I get a gun?”

“Are you insane?” Danny cries as Steve asks, genuinely, “Where would you even hide a gun in that dress?”

Unable to resist, you shoot him a coy smile and challenge, “Wouldn’t you like to know, Commander?”

“Woah.” Your cousin holds his hands up between the two of you and declares, “Flag on the play. Don’t- Don’t do that. No flirting. Get in, entice Lee to steal your fake diamonds, get out. Deal?”

“We’ve got it, Detective,” Steve huffs, bending down to adjust his ankle holster.

Junior approaches then with a gorgeous looking diamond necklace and announces, “Got our bait here, boss.”

“Excellent,” Steve says, taking the jewelry from him and motioning for you to turn around. He gathers the necklace in one hand, his fingers drifting across your shoulder and collarbone to grasp one end before he fits it snugly around your neck. The simple touch has your veins flooding with heat, but you tamp down your reaction, keenly aware of the multiple sets of eyes on the two of you. “Tight enough?” he murmurs, and you nod in response, not yet trusting your voice.

“Oh, and one more thing!” Lou reaches into his pocket and pulls out a box, opening it with a flourish to reveal one simple silver band, the other studded with diamonds. “Little extra bling for good measure.” Your cheeks flush at the sight, and you turn your face away from Steve while you slide the wedding ring onto your finger.

One glance at its mate on your boyfriend’s hand has you weak in the knees, and Tani whispers, “Girl, you are down bad.”

“Shut up,” you hiss, fighting the blush threatening to give you away. Steve approaches with one eyebrow raised in curiosity, and you clear your throat before taking the arm he’s offered to you. You tuck your hand into the crook of his elbow, pressing yourself close to him and sending a sharp look to your older cousin when you feel his eyes boring holes into the two of you. “Knock it off, Danny.”

He cups your face between his hands and pulls you closer to press a kiss to your forehead with an apologetic smile. “Be smart. Be safe. I love you. You watch her back, okay?” He directs the last comment to his best friend with all the gruffness of a father sending his daughter off to prom.

“I will, Danny,” Steve answers solemnly, squeezing your hand.

“Alright, buddy. But not too close, okay? Remember, I’m always watch-”

You pull the door shut behind you with a sigh. Steve guides you down the hallway towards the elevators, and your grip on his arm tightens at the prospect of what you’re about to do.

Steve immediately intuits your nerves and offers a soothing, “Hey, you’re okay.” He takes your left hand in his, his right hand coming to rest on the small of your back so you feel completely enveloped by his steadying presence. He lets his thumb drift back and forth across your skin, just above where the fabric drapes at the base of your spine, and your comms come crackling to life. “Higher.”

Steve shifts his hand up with a chuckle, and your cousin begrudgingly remarks, “Better.”

The moment relieves some of your tension, and you shake your head before pressing the call button for the elevator. The lavish gold doors open to reveal an already sizable group dressed to the nines and clearly heading to the big casino-sponsored event downstairs. Steve applies gentle pressure on your back to guide you into the elevator, and as you descend each floor and the crowd grows, you’re forced closer together in the corner. “You’re wearing a new perfume,” Steve comments, his lips right by your ear to avoid your conversation being picked up by his mic.

“How observant,” you reply. “My boyfriend bought it for me.”

“He has excellent taste,” he continues the charade, and you resist the urge to roll your eyes at the compliment. With the crowd in the elevator blocking the camera’s view, Steve allows his fingers to glide down your spine until they reach their intended destination, and he sucks in a sharp breath when he realizes you’re not wearing anything under your dress. You smirk to yourself but quickly lose the upper hand, forced to swallow down a gasp when the elevator doors open into the lobby and Steve brazenly palms your ass while calmly stating, “Target acquired.”

“We see him, too,” Junior affirms. “East corner of the lobby, talking to the concierge.”

“Come on, darling,” Steve croons, settling into character- or rather dropping your usual act. “Let’s go win me some more money to spend on you.”

__________

“No entry without invitation, sir.”

You crane your neck to look up at the beefy bodyguard at the entrance to the high roller section. His biceps must be the size of your head, if not bigger, he’s got at least 6 inches on Steve, and his hulking form is completely blocking your view of the room behind him.

“Honey,” you murmur, “you brought it with you, didn’t you?”

Steve gives you an easy smile and pulls a gold-plated poker chip from the breast pocket of his tux. “Of course, my love.”

“Alright, enough with the cutesy nicknames,” Danny gripes, and you’re forced to stifle a laugh at Tani admonishing him in the background. The security guard pulls back the velvet rope to let you pass, and you duck behind the curtain to cross into the high roller area.

The room is a sea of expensive suits and sparkling cocktail dresses. A thick cloud of sweet-smelling smoke has settled in the air from the Cubans lit around the room, and the distinct symphony of ice clinking in glass tumblers joins the hum of dealers murmuring at their tables.

“Why don’t you go get us a drink and I’ll find a table to join?”

“The usual?” you purr in question, running your manicured fingers across the lapel of Steve’s suit.

“That’s perfect,” he assents, squeezing your hip before releasing you to do your own recon. Then you feel his fingers lace through yours and he murmurs, “Y/N, wait.” When you turn back to Steve, he tugs you closer by your connected hands and presses his lips to yours in a kiss that has your head buzzing before a drop of alcohol has even hit your tongue. “Lee’s watching,” he whispers against your mouth by way of explanation.

“Then let’s give him something to look at,” you respond with a glint in your eye, winding your arms around his neck and pulling him in for another kiss. Steve’s left hand comes up to rest on the nape of your neck as the other caresses the diamond fitted snuggly against the hollow of your throat, making sure that it catches the light just so as you lay the groundwork for your operation tonight.

“He’s practically suffocating her,” Danny cries in the hotel room upstairs, hands raised while he stares at the two of you in disbelief. “What’d I say about ‘not too close’, huh? Animal.”

“Okay, lovebirds, get some air,” Lou chuckles over your comms. “Seems like our man Lee has his eye on the prize now.”

Junior leans over to Tani as he watches the two of you part ways on screen, tracking your path to the bar with a skeptical brow. “Is it just me, or was that… intense?”

“C’mon, Junes,” she laughs breezily. “That is theater at its finest.”

“One scotch on the rocks, and one vodka tonic that’s light on the tonic,” you place your order at the bar, absentmindedly letting your fingers drift over the diamonds as you peruse the top shelf.

“Easy there, cowgirl,” Danny coaches in your ear. You look around for the nearest mounted dome camera and make a face at it. “Real mature, kid.”

You feel a heated gaze on your back, and you turn to flash a coy smile at Mister Jason Lee, the suspected brains behind the smuggling operation, before collecting your drinks and making your way back to Steve.

“He’s interested,” you murmur in his ear as you bend down to place the glass between his hands on the table. “But we need to really hook him. Better start throwing some money around, hotshot.”

“Go ahead, baby,” Steve says animatedly, attracting the attention of the other players around the table. He makes a big show of closing his eyes and letting you bet for him, clearly unaffected by winning or losing a few hundred on your blind faith. As you lean over to push a stack of chips towards the pot, you hear an appreciative titter around the table and turn to find Steve with one eye very obviously peeking- but definitely not at what your hands are doing.

“Naughty boy,” you scold playfully, and he offers his palms in an act of mock deference.

“Can you blame the man?” one of the other players barks out through a raucous laugh, and you smile politely even though their leering eyes make your skin crawl. When you bend to retrieve your drink, Steve moves closer with a grin and whispers in your ear, “If one of them so much as breathes in your direction, I’ll break off every one of their fingers and feed them to ‘em, okay, mama?”

Acutely aware that Danny and the rest of the team are watching your every interaction, you suppress a shiver and murmur back, “Sir, yes, sir.”

Steve has mixed luck on his first few hands, but you’re sure to make a big show of celebrating each win with a kiss that has the older women in the room clutching their proverbial pearls and Lee hanging onto your every move. You toy with the necklace as a nervous habit each time Steve places his bet and let your fingers trail across his broad shoulders as he studies each hand, squeezing affectionately every now and then.

“I hate this,” Danny declares, a dismayed frown tugging at his lips as he watches you on the live CCTV footage. On the small screen, you drape your arms around Steve’s neck and press a kiss to his cheek before murmuring something in his ear that’s too quiet for the hidden mic to pick up but has Steve grinning like a fool. “I hate this. Why did I let him talk me into this? Putz.”

“Relax, Danny,” Lou attempts to soothe his ruffled feathers. “They’re doing great.”

“Hey, hey, look!” Tani calls to garner their attention. “They’ve lured Lee in. He’s about to make contact.”

“Good evening,” he opens politely, pulling out the chair next to Steve.

“Evening,” your boyfriend offers in kind.

“Do you mind if I join you for the next hand?”

“Not at all,” you purr. “Perhaps you can help break my husband’s current losing streak.”

“With a good luck charm like you on his arm?” Lee counters smoothly. “Impossible.”

“From your mouth to the cards’ ears,” you laugh airily. “Let me go get you another drink, my love,” you say to excuse yourself, running your hand down Steve’s arm to collect his glass. “Can I get you anything, Mister…?”

“Good girl,” Tani praises you quietly over your comms.

“Lee,” he supplies. “But please, call me Jason.” He raises the remaining amber liquid in his glass with a smile then says, “Perhaps when I finish this drink, I’ll have what your husband’s having. Clearly he’s got excellent taste.” The way his eyes wander across your body isn’t lost on you.

“Arrogant son of a bitch,” Lou scoffs to his fellow team members upstairs. “Not even using an alias.”

Steve notices Lee’s hungry gaze straying from his cards to appreciate your form against the backdrop of the expansive bar and remarks, “Beautiful, isn’t she?”

“Indeed,” he agrees, swirling the expensive liquor in his glass before taking a sip. “Women like that are hard to find. As rare as that diamond around her neck.”

“Laying it on thick there, buddy,” Danny comments over your comms, and you steal a glance over to the table. “Take the bait, Steve.”

“Only the finest for my girl.”

When you return to the table with your and Steve’s drinks in hand, he hooks his ankle around the chair beside him and tugs it close for you to sit by him. “Slick move, double-oh-five-oh,” you murmur appreciatively in his ear before nipping at his earlobe. He seems extra possessive now, his hand either resting on your thigh, or your hip, or the back of your neck, always maintaining some form of skin to skin contact while the other holds his cards, and you can’t help but wonder what transpired between the two men.

Leaning over, Steve presses his lips to the point where your pulse thrums along your throat and asks, “What should we bet, beautiful girl?”

“Hm?” Your gaze is hazy, more so drunk on Steve’s touch than alcohol, and the unbidden thought that you can’t wait for this guy to be in cuffs so you can take your man home crosses your mind. You run your manicured fingers down his cheek and answer coyly, “I want you to go all in.”

The two of you dutifully ignore Danny’s protesting in your ears at your overt innuendo as Steve pushes his stack of chips to the center of the table.

“A bold move,” Lee declares with a whistle.

“What’s a few thousand when I have a million on my arm, hm?” your boyfriend counters with a sly glance in your direction.

“Let’s make this a real game. I’m all in, too.”

The dealer flips over the river card, and Steve’s arm tenses beneath your fingertips. The other few players around the table toss their cards aside with a sigh, but Lee looks over at the two of you with a grin, presenting his hand- a flush- with a flourish. He stands to collect the pot but Steve holds up one finger.

“Not so fast, my friend,” he laughs, his confidence making your body grow warm. Steve lays his hand out on the table with a smug smile. “Full house. Aces over eights.”

You let out an excited squeal, genuinely delighted at such a triumphant win, and pull Steve toward you by the lapels of his jacket to mold your lips to his. He makes an appreciative noise low in the back of his throat and his hand comes up to cup your neck in an overtly possessive manner that has you melting into his embrace. You feel his fingers playing with the clasp resting at the nape of your neck, and then the necklace falls into your lap, the next phase of your ruse in full effect now.

You pull back with a gasp and pout at Steve, your eyes wide. “It broke!”

“Then I’ll buy you ten more,” he answers easily, shrugging off your concern. “Go put it upstairs and don’t give it a second thought, okay?” He presses his lips to yours once more and gives you an affectionate pat below the dip of your dress when you stand that has you blushing. You can practically feel Danny’s laser eyes through the screen where he’s watching you.

You make sure to wobble the tiniest bit when you move, steadying yourself on Steve’s shoulder with a laugh. “What was our room number, honey?”

He shares a knowing look with your mark, then jokes, “How many vodka tonics have you had, hm? How many fingers am I holding up?” He has his fist raised and you smack at his chest with an eye roll. “217, my love,” Steve supplies before taking your hand and kissing the wedding band adorning your ring finger.

You head upstairs to the empty room the team had rented for this very purpose and place the necklace in the carefully concealed safe in the cupboard. When you return to the table, you find Steve alone.

“Where’s our friend?”

“Turned in for the night after that big loss,” your boyfriend supplies, winking at you. “Shall we?”

He offers you his arm, and after collecting his winnings, the two of you make your way to the lobby to lie in wait. “You’re going to be insufferable about that win forever now, aren’t you?”

“You said I was bad at poker,” Steve reminds you.

“You still are,” you fire back. “Dumb luck one time does not a skilled player make.”

“Jeez, boss,” Junior’s voice comes crackling in over your comms. “Want some ice for that burn?”

“Would you just- would you shut up and focus on the room, please?”

After a few minutes of waiting with no sighting of Lee, you lean into Steve’s chest and ask the team, “Anything?”

“Girl, hop off the mic,” Lou admonishes you, and you jump back from Steve. “We can hear you when you talk normally. Damn.”

Leaning back in, this time you whisper, “Sorry, guys.”

“Hey, McGarrett?” Tani speaks calmly but you can hear an edge of tension to her voice. “At your 4 o’clock, there’s two guys in suits who’ve had an eye on your table all night. I thought they were watching for potential card counting but they seem to have taken an interest in you and Y/N.”

“Copy,” Steve says quietly, pulling you closer to his body in a protective move in case all hell breaks loose.

“Let’s just show them we’re not a threat,” you offer.

“You want to go back in?”

“I was thinking of a more… hands on approach.” As the clicking of Italian leather shoes on the polished floor grows closer to you, you spin Steve around and push him against the wall, crashing into him for a heated kiss. His strong hands caress your bare back for a moment before one stays put to hold you against him while the other deftly undoes the knot holding your bun, your hair cascading down to its full length so Steve can use it for better leverage. You can’t help but moan into his mouth as he kisses you like a man starved until you’re shaken from your stupor by yelling approaching the lobby.

“Hey! Five-0! Stop running, dumbass!”

Without opening your eyes or breaking your kiss, you stick your foot out at the opportune time, making contact with the ankle of your diamond thief’s leg so he goes sprawling. There’s a faint splash to your right, and when you pull away for a breath, you can see your necklace winking at you from the lobby fountain.

Danny catches up to the scene and yells, “Hands- hey! Hands!”

Lee raises his hands above his head with a sigh, but your cousin continues on, “You two! Yeah, let me see your hands, too!” You turn to find Danny’s gun aimed at the diamond smuggler, but his fiery eyes are trained on you while Tani and Junior wrestle the other two lackeys to the floor nearby. You exchange a look with Steve, then feel the warmth of his palms leave your bare skin as the two of you slowly raise your hands as well. Clearing your throat, you offer meekly, “We’re really into method acting?”

“We’ll talk about this later,” Danny growls, slapping zip ties on a defiant Lee and ratcheting them tight before hauling him to his feet.

“Hey, man, ease up,” he whines and Danny barks, “You shut up.” He continues lamenting his woes audibly as he leads the thief to the waiting squad car, grumbling, “Had enough of all of you. My baby cousin and my best friend. Christ. What am I gonna tell my aunt?”

Steve whistles low under his breath when Danny’s out of earshot, then mutters, “That could’ve gone better.”

“On the plus side,” you comment, “he still referred to you as his best friend.”

Tani shoots you a sympathetic smile when she passes by with the man she apprehended, but Junior wastes no time leaning in and playfully tutting, “Bus-ted.” Steve raises one eyebrow and he tacks on a hurried, “Sir.”

—————

With Lee and his crew stewing in interrogation and HPD clearing the scene, you’re left sitting on the couch in Steve’s office like kids who got sent to the principal for misbehaving in school. The three of you must look ridiculous from the rest of the team’s point of view- you clad in spare clothes from Steve’s wardrobe in his office that you’re positively swimming in, your 40-plus-year-old boyfriend in a full tux with his bow tie and top few buttons undone, hand pressed over his mouth to avoid saying something that will further incense your cousin, and said cousin still dressed in his shirt and tie pacing the floor in front of you with his hands flying to emphasize every point he makes.

“And you-” Danny pauses his pacing to point an accusatory finger at his best friend. “How old are you, huh?” The finger changes angles to point at you. “And how old is she?”

“Do you want me to actually answer the quest-”

“No, Steve, they’re rhetorical questions! I know how old you are, and I’ll tell you! Too old for my baby cousin, that’s how old, huh? What’s the matter with you?”

“Why don’t you let Y/N speak for herself, Danny? Gotta let her grow up, buddy, c’mon now.”

“Thank you!” you cry. “Can I say something?”

The blonde and brunette duo turns to look at you with the same infuriating, incredulous look before simultaneously deciding, “No.”

“Alright, y’know what?” You slap your hands against your thighs and stand with a huff. “You two-” You point back and forth between Steve and Danny before continuing, “You work out your little marital spat. Daniel, when you’re ready to talk to me like the adult I am, I’ll be with Tani. After I drink some water. Because I’m still buzzed.” With that, you attempt to walk out of your boyfriend’s office with your head held high but are thwarted by the door, pushing on it to no avail.

“It’s a pull-” Danny says quietly, and Steve jumps in at the same time, “Pull, babe, you gotta pull on the-”

“I got it,” you bark at them, tugging on the glass door with a grumble about architectural intuitiveness.

After a long conversation with Steve and a short interrogation with Lee and his associates, Danny finds you nursing a bottle of water in Tani’s office, as promised. She slips out as your cousin takes a seat next to you, pulling you into a hug that you allow yourself to melt into even though you mutter all the while under your breath about his overprotective nature.

“I’m sorry I made you feel like you couldn’t just tell me you were seeing Steve.”

Woah. What?

“What?” Danny laughs. “You were right. We should talk about this like adults.”

“Did I say that out loud?”

“The ‘Woah. What?’? Yeah, you did, babe, it was very much not an inside thought.”

“Excellent,” you laugh, nodding solemnly. “Well, um, thank you for that. And sorry for not coming out and just telling you.”

“Guess I made it pretty hard for you to tell me, huh? What with the two rules and-”

“Yup.”

“But everybody else knew or-”

“Tani knew, cause she’s my girl, y’know. Grace figured it out pretty quickly. Pretty sure Lou’s had a feeling since at least Thanksgiving, honestly.”

Danny sits back with a start, pulling away from your hug. “How long has this been going on?”

With a sigh, you realize it’s time to come clean. “You remember when I wanted to go on that dive with you, and you said I should take Steve since you don’t ‘do water’? Well, Steve took me to this really beautiful dive spot and we kind of made a day of it so…”

“That was like-”

“A while-”

“Like seven months ago!”

“I mean, we didn’t exactly start dating on that day- well, no, we kind of did,” you correct yourself quietly, biting your lip with a grimace, but Danny’s already halfway across the floor back to Steve’s office. Lou takes the opportunity to poke his head in to check on you and you draw out a slow, “So Lou…” He raises one eyebrow in question, and you dare to ask, “Would now be a bad time to tell Danny about Will and Grace?”

—————

Tagging you beautiful people who commented for me to finish writing this 🖤

@the-silentium @ilovewriting06 @jamie2305 @kelssssxd @cassadilasworld

[makethatelevenrings]

Day 3: Anal w/ Roy Kent

kinda wish today was choking bc I had a joke about no one chokes harder than the Republican party

Kinktober Masterlist

“Are you sure about this?”

The question startled a laugh out of you. You laid back on the plush bed beneath you and spread your arms out against the soft, cotton sheets. Despite dating a very rich man, the life of luxury still amazed you and if there was one thing Roy never skimped on, it was on his sleep.

“Yes, you muppet. You’ve asked me that three times now. I’m sure.”

He raised his hands in surrender. “I just want to make sure I’m not fucking this up.” Roy meant it to be humorous but you could see that he was tense. You pushed yourself up and settled on your knees so you could lean up and grab his shoulders.

“I wouldn’t trust anyone else but you, Roy Kent. So get that pretty head out of your arse and get your other head into my arse.”

It was times like these that he regretted dating a younger woman.

“Fucking hell,” he choked out. “Have some compassion on my nerves.”

“Alright, Mrs Bennett,” you teased. You smoothed your hand down his shoulders and then traced your fingers down the soft hair that covered his chest. “If you’re not comfortable with it, then we don’t have to do it. It’s totally fine.”

“No, I just…I don’t want to hurt you.”

Your big softy. You cupped his cheek and smiled softly at the conflicted look in his dark eyes. For such a menacing man, he really was the biggest softy when it came to you. Your thumb rubbed along the soft skin of his lips and he breathed out against your touch.

“Knowing you the way I do, you did your research, right?”

“Might’ve asked Tartt if he’s ever popped a cherry before,” he grunted. You giggled at the mental image of that conversation.

“See? And I’ve done my research and I know my safewords. If at any point either one of us needs to stop, we stop. Right?”

“Right.”

You pushed away from his chest and landed back on the soft mattress. “So pop my cherry, Kent.”

He growled and flipped you over in that deliciously strong way of his. You sighed as you laid out on your stomach, but then he was grabbing your hips and making sure your back was arched and ass prominent. Roy slid his hands over the soft cotton of your sleep shorts and then slowly eased the fabric down, revealing the puckered hole he had yet to breach.

Your eyes fluttered shut in anticipation and you burned with the unreleased desire that had been slowly building in your veins. This was some wild fantasy that had come to mind. You never thought he would actually-

Holy shit. Roy Kent was rimming you.

The rough burn of his beard against your sensitive flesh lit your nerves on fire. His strong hands pulled your ass cheeks apart so he could access your hole better. You moaned at the warm touch against your skin and it nearly covered up the sound of the lube bottle being opened. Fuck, this was really happening.

One of his lube-covered fingers replaced his tongue as he probed at your hole. You instinctively clenched and then relaxed as he eased the tip of one finger in and then let it rest until you gathered your bearings. This was so much tighter than your pussy. A startled gasp escaped you as he pushed in further and Roy paused.

“Alright?” His other hand stroked down the inside of your thigh and you nodded.

“Yes. Yeah. Fuck. Keep going.”

He worked you open, slow and gentle and completely unlike the man he was portrayed to be, until he could work in two fingers. Then three. It was at that point that you were practically whimpering into the pillow underneath you.

“If you don’t put that cock in me in the next five seconds, I won’t let you near me for a month.”

“Yeah right,” he snorted. The sheets rustled beside you and the snick of the lube bottle being opened once more caught your attention. Roy adjusted himself on the bed and then he was there. The blunt head of his cock pressed against the mess he had made of you and you scrambled to grab the sheets as he started to slowly fuck his way into your tight channel.

“Fuck, Roy. Fuck,” you moaned. “Just like that.”

He leaned down to kiss the small of your back before he slid fully into your ass and then settled, giving you time to adjust. You flashed him a thumbs up and he slowly slid out before thrusting back into you. Your body jolted with the thrust and you moaned in appreciation at the feeling. It was foreign and strange, but so fucking hot.

You could tell he liked it too based on the way his breathing became ragged and rough at the edges. This had to be a totally new sensation for him too. Tight and controlled. His hips snapped against yours and your eyes rolled back into your head. Shit, that felt good.

Roy reached down and rubbed at your clit, pushing you towards the edge and forcing you to tumble over until you were whining and sobbing into the pillow below you. His hips stuttered as he came, spilling into the condom, and then he was carefully pulling out of you and lying you down on your side.

Silence, except for your labored breathing, filled the room. Your brain was mush. Gentle hands caressed your side, your hair, your thighs.

“He’s here. He’s there. He’s every fucking where,” you mumbled out. Roy barked out a surprised laugh and leaned over to kiss your cheek.

“Came everywhere in you now, haven’t I?” he hummed.

“Roy Kent,” you sang. “Roy Kent fucked my ass.”

“God, I love you.”

[cattynamie]

The way they say "I love you" <33

+Riddle Rosehearts + Leona Kingscholar.

Author's note : i actually DID have to do some research to write some of these characters (Riddle), but i hope i got them correctly :))

Warnings : None! completely SFW. Anyone can read this freely, and as far as im aware, the reader has no specific pronouns and can or can not be seen as Yuu! The choice is up to you.

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Riddle Rosehearts makes time for you. I believe that, everyone and their mother's by now, knows that Riddle can be very strict with his schedule. (Either because of his grades or because of the rules of the red queen) And making barely any time for himself.

But then you came along. Which was annoying at first, of course, not because of you, he would never be annoyed at you or your persona. He was annoyed on how you made him feel. You had always made an effort to remember some of the eight hundred and ten rules, even when you both were not even on the same dorm, which he very much appreciated. But that made his mind wander, like it NEVER has before.

Wander at what, you ask? At you, obviously. He never seemed to get you off of his mind for second. Much to Riddle's dislike.

So, after accepting that he may have gotten some kind of liking to a troublemaker like you, He started to invite you to every cricket, game, every unbirthday party, everything within an personal schedule of his, of course.

He even started on keeping track of the time for your monthly evening of drinking tea. (With just you two) And with everything. Eventually, Riddle started to keep track and take care of you your schedule too.

You need to pass an exam but you know little about the subject? Riddle will make time to tutor you on Tuedays after school way before the exam comes. You want to try a tart just thirty minutes before the unbirthdy party? .......He could turn a blind eye. Just this once. (He's serious)

Needless to say, Riddle installed a whole new calendar app just to schedule your little time together.

Leona Kingscholar spoils you as much as possible. Once you two already started officially dating, you were already on his mind 24/7, (Just like Riddle) but Leona, didn't quite mind actually. Not that he would ever admit that to you or anyone on that matter.

But he started to pick up on the little things you do and like. You've been eyeing a dessert but don't have the money to spoil yourself? BAM. There's at least three of them in your bag after your done with Varga's class.

Did you just say that your headphones broke down? BAM. The next day, Leona casually sneaks one into your ear with your favorite song on while you're distracted eating lunch and telling him about your day in the botanical garden.

On the weekend, you've been wanting to go shopping for this shirt you liked online at the mall? EEEUGH fine, he'll go with you, but you're his for the next of the weekend. (Bro's acting as he didn't buy you the shirt you wanted plus brand new clothes you also liked at the spot) Yeah, you both COULD HAVE sleeped through the whole weekend together in each other's embrace, but eeing you smile while you try the new things you have is good enough.

Leona never saw the appeal of spoiling himself. He already had everything he could ever want. But when it comes to you, he could go to the end of the earth and waste every penny of his money just to see you smile once again.

And he's not planning on stopping anytime soon. (or ever...)

-

OK that's all!!! I had fun wrting for Leona for the second time, however, im not sure if i got Riddle's character completely right.. so any notes or criticism will be very much welcomed!! thanks for anyone who actually reads this i love you xoxo byeeeeee!!!

[igotanidea]

Dating Sam Winchester headcanons.

Requested: I was wondering if you could write something supernatural with Sam Winchester, what kind of boyfriend would Sam be? Thank you anon, made that as expanded headcanons starting from meeting and going further in the relationship.

A little NSFW in point 16.

***

1.Bookshops dates

I mean come on, all things considered I am pretty sure you would meet him in the library rather than any place else. And even if you weren’t actually reaching for mythological monsters encyclopaedia or the yearbook of the city from 1456, you were bound to meet at the counter. It wasn’t that big bookshop after all and Sam, with his tall, muscular silhouette was definitely filling most of the space, forcing you to sneak under his arm to get what you were aiming for. Not that you complained, cause he does smell good.

2. Soul longing – as silly as that may sound. Ok listen up. He had women, that’s for sure. But one night stands is only good for so long. And unlike Dean he needed stability from the beginning. Sam is not a player nor a playboy. And as for you? You’re not just gonna jump into the bed of a very handsome, tall and broad shouldered man you met briefly while buying a book, right?

Even if you can imagine so many things he could do with those hands….

Even if you can tell just by looking at him that he’s got enough experience and skills to keep you up all night and –

“Miss? Miss are you all right?”

Damn, seem like you just spaced out in front of the guy who’s been currently eyeing you with those deep eyes piercing right into your soul.

Impossible to forget and even more impossible to let go.

3. Cliché scenario – you actually became a part of team free will after getting into a demon related accident serving the part of a lady in distress perfectly. Got hurt so bad the boys Sam felt guilty enough to look for you for a couple weeks while getting too attached.

4. Obviously wanting to keep you out of the family business. Too bad he got himself a persistent badass, who refused to sit cases out. You may not be a hunter, but you’re a girl. And who’s better than a woman when it comes to making scenes and getting man to mansplain to the poor, innocent soul that knows nothing? The first time you faked cried he fell for it all the way and never questioned your skills again.

5. Probably making you get an anti-possession tattoo. Just for safety, of course. And holding your hand all time while getting it done, caressing your palm in that special reassuring way. And then kissing it better after, regardless of the place it was inked on.  

6. Funny thing he was hesitant to put a tag on your relationship. At first. Can’t blame him given all that happened to his mother and Jess. But his emotional side finally took over and he blurted something in the middle of an argument.

“You’re staying here tonight.”

“The hell I am, Sam.”

“I’m not asking.”

‘You’re not my boss.”

“Well I am your boyfriend!”

“Did you just-? Sam? Sam, did you just - ?”

You never got to finish that sentence. And just that one time you stayed behind.

Behind being on the backseat, no further.

7. Bantering over silly stuff while making Dean crazy, cause since you two got together there’s no one to bring him pie.  

8. Knowledge duels – as long as you pick the theme, cause no way you’re going against him in history or demonology.  It is however possible to beat him in popculture or modern cinematography.

“How am I supposed to know all those –“

“Educate yourself Sammy.”

“Oh I will educate you on something –“

9. Merciless teasing from Dean about stuff that should not ever be his business.

“Hey, whose underwear is that?”

“Brought you two some protection.”

“Hey maybe we can get a threesome?”

“Is that a hickey on your neck Y/N? God, girl, you are loud.”

(but we all know that’s the way Dean’s inner soft side is showing)

10. Doing research while laying head on his chest, tracing patterns on his skin. (making him distracted and locked up in another room until you start to behave.)

11. Doing research in the various libraries. You have no idea but he raises his gaze from the book way too often to actually comprehend any of the text. The way you are frowning, scrunching your nose and the way your eyes shine every time you come upon a clue or a helpful fact seem to be more interesting.

12. Fights – oh, damn, it was bound to happen right?

Arguing with Sam is impossible. He always keeps his cool, not letting the blood boil no matter how many needles you gives him. Sometimes it feels like he’s wearing that stupid armour turning into stone just to infuriate you.

But not for long, cause Sammy can’t stand to see you hurt or broken. That’s not him. It doesn’t matter if you started the fight (you’re being reckless, you’re gonna get killed, you need some rest) or he was the part to initiate it (you’re not the hunter, I know better, I’ll handle it) he’ll be all up for communication. Talking through.

Being a Winchester comes with toughness and roughness sometimes, but Sam doesn’t deny having feelings he want to work on. With you.

It’s not a perfect relationship but you’re patching it up with all the best and most resistant fabric.

13. Subtle hand holding while driving on a hunt. You may be in the backseat while both brothers take the front ones, but who cares. The blank between the driver and shotgun is for something, right? And who cares about the gearbox?

14. Forehead kisses and cuddling – you have actually seen Sam right? If that’s not a giant teddy bear than I don’t know who is. Definition of safety and warmth. Just imagine nuzzling into him with those strong arms around you keeping you safe from any demon, angel, witch, wendigo, shapeshifter or whatever else monster might come for you.

15. Steamy make out session in the impala just to get some privacy. Honestly I believe at some point this would be used as a threat for alone time.

"Get out Dean.”

“ Mmm. Nope. Not happening. I got stuff to do here.”

“I said get out.”

“Make me.”

“Well I think you should go and check on your car before I take care of the backseat.”

Wide eyes, rushing out and not getting back for hours.

Mission completed.

16. Getting intimate with Sam is indescribable. You don’t even need words and yet he seems to understand everything your body tries to convey. Soft, slow, sensual and tender love making while looking into your eyes, refusing to let your gaze drop? Tracing your body and kissing all over your soft skin? Making you feel fragile, small and delicate no matter your size?

All done.

I see Sam as a soft dom. He could break your boundaries easily and probably would, but never to the point of hurting you.

Rough play, BDSM, kinks, making love on any flat surface possible? Not exactly his style.

Stretching you out, wrapping your legs around his waist, pressing you into the mattress, marking you? Absolutely.

He’s fine with pleasuring you, getting to know what turns you on (hitting and finding all the sensitive spots that makes you mewl and rake nails down his body), never failing to make you see stars.

He may not be talking too much and not use a lot of dirty talk, but hey, a few thrusts, a few flicks of his tongue, his muscles flexing under your fingersand the feel of him so freaking deep and you forget something such as words exist.

17. Getting just the right amount of aftercare cuddles, kisses and hugs. Duties are calling and Sam may be a bit of a workaholic, but you’re on top of the “to-do-list.” Taking just the right amount of time to help you get back to reality, getting your floating soul back into your thoroughly loved out body by caresses, kisses, touches, strokes. Whatever you need.

He loves you.