#I could probably get a friend of mine to set me up with someone tolerable enough if nothing else

[omegapheromone]

My IRL Cycle (blood week) was late and irregular this time so I'm now struggling to predict when my next heat is going to be fml

[atom-writings]

Are matchups still open? If so, could you do mine?

I’m a 19 year old girl. I’m mildly introverted. According to the 16 personalities quiz, I’m an INFJ.

People often describe me as sweet and quiet. While ‘quiet’ does seem to be my default setting, I can talk your ear off when it’s about a topic I really care about. In general, I’m more talkative around people I’ve gotten to know and am comfortable around. I tend to be more mild-mannered and can have a hard time standing up for myself, but I become a lot more assertive when I feel I’m standing up for justice.

I’m quite imaginative, by the way. I can be quiet on the outside, but I have an active inner world and I often daydream stories in my head. I’d like to be a part-time writer.

By the way, I’m a ballerina. Some of my dream roles are Odette/Odile, Juliet, Giselle and Manon. (If you don’t know what those are, just ignore this!)

Other interests/hobbies/passtimes of mine include figure skating, literature (both classic and contemporary), fashion (particularly vintage and retro), listening to music (all genres), learning to play music and more. I read and write fanfiction, and I’m into fandom.

More about my personality! I try to be kind and helpful to others. I tend to give people the benefit of a doubt, which has led me to making toxic friendships in the past.

As for my flaws, I can be somewhat of a pushover when it comes to myself. I can just keep on accepting bad treatment from someone until I finally get fed up and try to ghost them (to varying levels of success). Also, I can be self-destructive.

As far as appearance goes, I have long black hair, light skin and dark blue eyes. I’ve been called pretty and cute a lot, but never hot. My best features are my big eyes and my dimpled smile (a lot of people compliment my smile! :D). I’m 162 cm tall. I have a slender hourglass build.

I would like someone I have engaging conversations with. Someone who can be both a lover and a best friend. I would like them to be able to appreciate my interests so I can talk about them with them. I would do the same for them. I don’t want someone who will be controlling or get angry at me — I wouldn’t leave but I’d be unhappy. I’m not at all a jealous person — I would fully trust my significant other. I’m open-minded, and I’d like them to be the same, or at least not be closed-minded.

I don’t mind having a partner who often takes the lead, I think I’d prefer it actually, but I don’t want to be controlled. If it matters, I’m more of a little spoon.

Ahaha, sorry for this mini essay. I won’t be upset if you ignore me.

I'd match you with... England!

Although he's definitely not sweet or soft, he'd balance you out quite well! (I think, at least.)

He gets really passionate about his own interests, so he would always be up to listen to you about yours. Especially if you're more talkative around him specifically, then he'd always encourage your ramblings <3

And if you have a hard time being assertive, he has no problem standing up for you. In fact, he loves doing so.

It may not seem like it, but he's really imaginative too! If you want someone to share a weird inner-world with, I assure you he's the man. His inner-world is probably stranger.

He's a great conversationalist too. With your love of literature, vintage fashion, and music, you'd have a lot in common to talk about and share.

He knows basically nothing about ballet, but he'd always come watch! He appreciates the finer things in life as well.

He really loves your kind nature, but he'd also be sure to not let anyone take advantage of it. He's seen that with a lot of people, and he wouldn't tolerate any behavior like that around you.

(Also, it's not important, but 162 cm is like his ideal height in a partner. Shorter than him, but not by too much (: )

And yeah, he would totally take the lead. He likes to think he's a lady's man, and he at least has the confidence of one.

He may have a temper, but he's definitely not controlling.

Although he can be a bit insecure and jealous, it's not something he can't get over. He's mature enough to learn; after all, he doesn't want to upset you.

As you two get to know each other, he'd soften, and you'd become a perfect match. Opposites attract, right?

[tombstuck-writes]

Knucklehead: Part 1, Chapter 2

Genre: Midwest Contemporary Young Adult Romance.

Word count: 27,615. Chapter 2/27.

Summary: “There was only one queer kid in town. That’s what he thought anyway, because it was him. If only his online almost-boyfriend lived nearby, things might be a little more tolerable.”

Content warnings: Graphic child abuse (it's not until part 2, and part 1 can be read stand-alone.)

Author's note:

Again, a big thank you to anyone who reads this story. I'll be posting one chapter every Saturday until it's done. Chapters will be under the #tombstuck-knucklehead tag, and I will also link them on the "Read Knucklehead" page on the header of my tumblr site.

You can read chapter 1 here.

Brandon sat at a small table in the dingy break room at work. He was eating an Italian style pinwheel wrap, and thinking about his therapy session the day before.

His mom had been concerned about him since he had graduated– even before then, if he was honest– and set him up an appointment with a therapist. Brandon had never seen a therapist before, and he was nervous. The first appointment was boring. He just had to tell the therapist his history and some detail about the issues he was having. The therapist noted it all down.

The day before had been his second appointment with the therapist.

He walked into the office. It was sparsely decorated, with a nameplate on the desk, and a single painting on the wall, of a tree. The walls were painted beige. He sat down on the small couch across from the lady’s desk, and the leather of the couch creaked underneath him. 

“So,” the therapist– Sarah, according to her nameplate. Brandon would have to remember that– began with a click of her pen. “Last time we spoke about your history, and made a goal for your treatment. How have things been going for you since we spoke last week?”

“The same,” Brandon said, bringing his hand up to his mouth to bite his nails.

“Mm, okay. Is there anything you’d like to talk about today, or would you like me to lead the session?” she asked.

“You can lead, I guess.” Brandon had no idea how to handle the awkwardness in the room.

“How often do you spend time with friends?” she asked.

This gave him pause. “Used to be every day. Now… I don’t even have friends.”

“What happened to those relationships?” Sarah asked.

“I ruined them by disappearing.”

“Do you think your, former, friends would react well to being asked to hang out right now?”

“Probably not. I haven’t spoken to them in weeks. Except– well.” Brandon paused again. Did he want to keep this new bond with Norm to himself?

“Except…?” Sarah waited.

“I actually hung out with someone yesterday. It was… fine, I guess.”

“That’s a great start, Brandon. Who was it you hung out with?”

“... My girlfriend, Natalie,” Brandon lied. It was out of his mouth before he could think better of it.

“Oh, my. I didn’t know you had a girlfriend. How long have you been together?”

“Um, a year and a half, about. We met in school.”

“And what did you do together yesterday?” Sarah asked.

“We went on a picnic date at the park. Ate sandwiches together and did some cloudgazing.”

“That sounds lovely. Did she have a good time?”

“I hope so,” Brandon said. This was insane, lying to the therapist. He needed to get a grip.

She ended the session a while later by giving Brandon some homework. He was supposed to spend time with either a friend, or his girlfriend this week. Something to get him out of the house and around other people that’s not work.

Speaking of work, his break was almost over. He got a text all of a sudden.

It was from Norm. Hey Bran. When’s your next day off?

Brandon was surprised. It seemed like Norm wanted to hang out pretty regularly now. Tomorrow, he simply answered.

Wanna go to the old mining museum with me? Norm texted back a moment later. Brandon chuckled lightly and took another bite of his lunch before answering.

Your hangout ideas are unconventional, he answered.

Does that mean no? :( 

Brandon sighed. He had been to the mining museum in middle school, and it had felt cramped and dark even then. He supposed it made sense, they were trying to make it feel like a mine shaft, but still. Shoved into a dark cramped space, probably just him and Norm? The mining museum wasn’t exactly a bouncing hangout for the kids these days, so it would be just the two of them. Alone. Touching.

Of course I’ll go. I meant it as a compliment, Brandon answered begrudgingly. He was in way over his head with this whole Norm thing.

The next day, the two of them were stood outside the old mining museum at ten o’clock in the morning. Brandon had been able to smell the alcohol on Norm in the car. He hoped Norm didn’t do anything dumb and get them kicked out. They walked in and a very old man in a cap that said “VETERAN” in all caps was sitting behind a desk.

“Welcome to the Cohocton Mining Museum.” The old man said.

“Thank you,” Brandon said, getting out his wallet. “Uh, what does it cost to go in?”

“Free to walk through, but we appreciate donations.” The old man said. “And we got souvenirs for sale if you’re interested.”

“Okay,” Brandon already had his wallet out so he pulled out a few ones to drop in the donation box, because he felt it would be rude not to.

“I thank you kindly,” the old man said. Brandon nodded at him in reply.

They went into the museum, and just as Brandon remembered, it was a bit cramped. Maybe not quite as bad as he had imagined when he was a kid— even though he’s bigger now— but still close quarters. 

Norm had smelled like alcohol before, but he didn’t seem to be blackout drunk, just tipsy. He was a giggly drunk, and had Brandon laughing by reenacting fictional mining scenarios. He was also flitting from display to display, pulling Brandon along by the hand.

He led Brandon to a display of phosphorescent minerals. “Bran, look!” He said, but he didn’t let go of Brandon’s hand after dragging him over there. Brandon technically saw the brightly glowing minerals, and they were cool, but every ounce of Brandon’s attention was drawn to Norm holding Brandon’s hand. He blushed and hoped Norm couldn’t see it.

“They’re,” Brandon began, trying to pull himself back into the conversation about the minerals. He looked over at Norm the same time Norm looked at him. “Beautiful,” he whispered.

Norm’s eyes got a bit wider as he stared at Brandon.

“The minerals, I mean!” Brandon said, panicking. Norm let go of his hand and rubbed the back of his own neck.

“Yeah, they totally are,” Norm said. He gulped. Brandon could see red creeping up Norm’s neck in the dim light. He was blushing too.

After they got through the museum, they were on the drive back to Norm’s house. Trees whipped by the car in a blur.

“So, that was cool,” Norm said, looking over at Brandon. Brandon nodded. After a moment of silence, he asked, “You liked it?” His question seemed to have a deeper meaning.

“Yeah, I did,” Brandon said, answering the implied question and the literal one. “The glow in the dark minerals were especially neat.” What am I doing?, he thought.

Norm bit his lip and looked out the side window, and Brandon wondered if he had gone too far, been too forward. He had a girlfriend, for Christ sakes. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

“Nah, man. You don’t have anything to be sorry for. I had fun,” Norm said, smiling lightly over at Brandon.

What does that mean? Does that mean he felt whatever was between us in the museum? I mean, how could he not, Brandon’s thoughts rambled on as he drove.

When they got back to Norm’s house, he asked, “Do you wanna come in and see my room?”

Brandon wondered if this was a dangerous thing to do. “Sure, yeah,” he said anyway.

As they walked through the living room, Norm’s mom and some other guy were sitting on the couch smoking pot. The guy nodded at Brandon and he nodded back, following Norm back to his room.

He distinctly thought he heard, “The fag’s brought his boyfriend over,” and then the two of them snickered. But maybe he misheard.

Norm’s room was plain and nearly unfurnished. He had a twin sized mattress on the floor, a plastic dresser, and a beat up TV with a Nintendo 64 plugged into it. There was also a closet, but Brandon couldn’t see what was in there. The only things on the wall were some black and white photocopied pictures from game guide magazines. 

“Cozy,” Brandon said, and Norm snorted.

“Yeah that’s one word for it,” Norm said. “Hey! Wanna play Mortal Kombat with me?”

“Oh, sure,” Brandon answered. He wasn’t sure where to sit.

Norm sat down on one end of the bed, and pulled the system closer so the controllers would reach the bed. Brandon sat next to him.

They played videogames together much longer than Brandon had originally intended to stay, and it was the most fun Brandon had had in a long time, even though he wasn’t the best at it.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Next chapter will come out Saturday 7/13/24.

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

𝑫𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒚 𝑫𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒊𝒏𝒈 (𝑱𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒀𝒖𝒏𝒉𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈 𝑾𝒐𝒐𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒈) 𝑹𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅

𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝙼𝚊𝚏𝚒𝚊/𝙳𝚒𝚕𝚏!𝙹𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚈𝚞𝚗𝚑𝚘 × 𝙴𝚡𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝙳𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚛! 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 (𝙵𝚎𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚎) × 𝙼𝚊𝚏𝚒𝚊/𝙳𝚒𝚕𝚏! 𝙹𝚞𝚗𝚐 𝚆𝚘𝚘𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚐

𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎: 𝚂𝚖𝚞𝚝, 𝙵𝚕𝚞𝚏𝚏, 𝙼𝚊𝚏𝚒𝚊 𝙰𝚄, 𝙳𝚒𝚕𝚏 𝙰𝚄

𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: 𝙾𝚗 𝚊 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚏𝚞𝚗, 𝚝𝚠𝚘 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚏𝚒𝚊 𝚋𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚛.

𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 𝟻.𝟹+𝙺

𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝙻𝚊𝚛𝚐𝚎 𝚊𝚐𝚎 𝚐𝚊𝚙 (𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚎𝚐𝚊𝚕 𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜), 𝚊𝚕𝚌𝚘𝚑𝚘𝚕 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚎𝚡𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚛𝚜, 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚙𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚓𝚘𝚋, 𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚕 (𝚏𝚎𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐), 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚍𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚞𝚗𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚜𝚎𝚡 (𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗) 𝙳𝚘𝚖! 𝚈𝚞𝚗𝚑𝚘, 𝙳𝚘𝚖! 𝚆𝚘𝚘𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚐, 𝚂𝚞𝚋! 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: @yunhofingers @yunhoiseyecandy @galaxteez @multidreams-and-desires @little-precious-baby @brie02 @rvse-miingi @couchpotatoaniki @deja-vux @a-soft-hornytiny @daniblogs164

♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡

"Anything else we can get for our most valued regulars?"

The two men waved their hands dismissively at the friendly and energetic owner of the establishment, thanking her for the drinks that were already provided while assuring her they were perfectly content.

"Well if you shall need anything don't hesitate to ask." She reminded them before walking away to attend the other customers and see that everything in the club was running smoothly.

The two men held up their drinks and clinked them against each other before downing them as if it was mere water. Slumping back into the comfortable french style chaise lounge sofa, the shorter mafioso let out a soft and relaxed exhale of breath.

"Well I'd say the whole operation was an absolute success. Don't you agree Yunho?" He tilted his head towards the more impotent one of them, the male swirling the contents of his newly poured drink around his glass cup.

"Indeed. Well done Wooyoung." He raised his glass towards his friend in acknowledgement before bringing the rim of the cup up to his lips.

The two men briefly scanned the spacious hall, occasionally waving or even winking at the more familiar faces that they had become very much acquainted with, sometimes even on a more intimate level that remained a naughty secret between them. Being admirers of beauty and anything aesthetically appealing, they of course had their gazes on the stage that encompassed the majority of the room. Their eyes never failed to take in the gorgeous dancers that were currently moving their bodies to the music playing in the background, some of them showcasing their more erotic side through spins and turns on some of the poles that were placed at various corners of the stage. That sight was always a welcoming one by all the men who went inside the high class club.

"Damn. Who is that?" Wooyoung pointed in the direction of a certain dancer who had caught his attention.

Following his finger, Yunho widened his eyes when he saw who it was that Wooyoung had spotted. She was indeed very captivating. Her movements were very sensual and completely fluid, it was more than obvious her technique was precise. Even her hair seemed to dance along with her body. She'd effortlessly spin around the metal pole as if it was the most natural thing in the world for her. Although she was placed towards the back, she seemed to dominate the stage alone with her presence. She just exuded charisma and eroticism that no doubt had many of the males growing a little problem in their pants thanks to her, Wooyoung and Yunho being no exception. They became lost in the beautiful and fascinating female, falling her charms as if her dance hypnotized them.

It was Yunho who snapped himself out of it when he took a closer look at her face and felt like something was off.

"How old is she? She looks a little... too young." Despite having been involved in the criminal world for years, having seen and committed many illegal acts, Yunho was not tolerant of anything that involved the exploitation of individuals who were too young for such a life.

Realizing he was right, Wooyoung shifted uncomfortably in his seat and cleared his throat. Calling over one of the male waiters, Yunho had to inquire about her.

"What can you tell me about the pretty face right over there?"

Seeing who he was referring to, the male server chuckled.

"Oh. That's Y/N. She's new here, started a few weeks ago but she's already conquered a lot of admirers as you can tell."

Indeed, as they looked around, most men had their eyes trained on her, no doubt imagining what she'd look like if you removed the lace bustier top and butt hugging leather shorts.

"How old is she?" Yunho got to the point.

Understanding what he meant, the server quickly dismissed his fears.

"I don't know exactly but I know for sure she's very much an adult. I'd say very early 20's, although I get that with that innocent looking baby face many wouldn't believe it. Folks seem to dig that though. Angelic face, sinful body? No wonder men are lusting over her."

Glancing over at their respective friend, the two men shared a small smirk between each other before settling back down to continue admiring the pretty girl.

"If you bosses would like, we could arrange a private show with her for you." The male staff offered but Wooyoung shook his head.

"No no, I don't think that will be necessary."

But he found that his resolve would soon come crumbling down when the young female took notice of their gawking towards her. Although she had never seen them before, she enjoyed the way their eyes were raking her body. She made sure not to break eye contact with them as she performed her next set of moves, which became a lot more sultry and risque in nature. She purposefully bent down or over more so her ass and tits would be the main focus of their staring.

"Fuck. I'd love to bend that ass over my lap." Yunho bit down on his bottom lip as one hand slowly rubbed the top of his thigh when she sent a flirtatious wink his way.

"Then why don't we make it come true?"

Calling for the male staff's attention once more, Wooyoung pulled out a large bill and placed it on the empty tray he was holding.

"I think we're going to take you on that offer, that is if the lady doesn't mind."

The staff couldn't help but snort.

"Trust me, I don't think she would mind one bit."

Ushering them to follow him, the male staff led them through the crowd of people that were gathered at the main showroom and down one of the hallways. Wooyoung and Yunho were surprised when instead of taking them to the upstairs private rooms, their guide instead took them down stairs.

"We don't actually tell most people this but our best and most expensive private rooms are actually down here and not upstairs. We only reserve them for V.I.P guests. And there's a bonus.."

The male staff typed in a code into the keypad that kept the entrance to the room locked and opened it up for them to let themselves in.

"There's absolutely no cameras, no rules, and you don't have to worry about anyone hearing anything." The man slyly told them as he walked off and told them to enjoy themselves.

Looking around, indeed the room was even better than the upper ones they had often rented. Not only was it bigger, it had a full bar for them to enjoy, there were multiple couches and they even mounted a pole in the middle of the room. Lilac curtains were strategically placed around to decorate the room which looked marvelous against the blue LED lights that illuminated several parts of the room so everything inside would be clearly visible. They could even make out a faint scent of lavender and vanilla, no doubt infused with pheromones to further enhance sexual arousal.

"No rules he said.... perfect." Wooyoung grinned as he made himself comfortable on one of the couches.

"Just because there are no cameras doesn't mean you can behave as you like. Remember that she'll probably only be here to dance for us and nothing else." Yunho reminded him.

"Relax old man, you know I would never touch a woman without her consent. Lucky me, I'm still handsome .... and rich." Wooyoung laughed slightly as he pulled out a bundle of money from his pocket causing his friend to roll his eyes.

"And what makes you think that is going to entice the young lady to suck your dick? If anything, she'll prefer someone younger and not some... geezer." He poked fun at his friend who looked at him with an unamused face.

"Look who's talking boomer." He scoffed at him.

Both of the men put an end to their small bantering when the door suddenly opened and in came none other than the very object of their fantasies, her stiletto heels clicking against the marble floor. She eyed them up and down with a curious expression, the corners of her mouth curling up just subtly.

"Hello there beautiful." Wooyoung leaned back and took in her figure.

"Good evening gentlemen." She greeted them as she shifted her weight from leg to the other one, her hands placed on her hips respectively.

"Y/N is it?" Yunho inquired as he tried to keep a little more decorum and tried not to stare too much at her.

"Unless you'd prefer to call me something else." She grinned at them with a smoldering expression.

"I'd love to call you mine." Wooyoung put his thoughts out there for the other two occupants in the room to hear, shocking and embarrassing one while the other seemed delighted to hear him say that.

"Wooyoung! Control yourself." Yunho nudged him with his elbow, warning him not to try anything stupid or foolish.

"And tell me then handsome, just how do you want me?"

Both men whipped their heads at her question, wondering if they heard her right.

"Umm- excuse me?" Yunho wanted her to clarify what she meant.

The young dancer took slow and careful steps closer to them, beginning to round the table that stood in between her and the couch they were seated in.

"On my knees, on all fours, against the wall, or laying down, just tell me what position you want me in." She was completely unafraid as she now carefully sat on the table right in front of them, spreading her legs just a little bit, daring them not to gaze in between them which they both ultimately failed in doing.

She was driving them crazy, making them lose every last bit of self control they had. And the way she'd innocently bat her eyelashes at them was not helping their case, it only served to fuel their growing lust for her even more. Wooyoung was about to speak up, but Yunho of course stopped him.

"No-no honey. We just wanted you to keep us some company." He wanted to slap himself for sounding so old fashioned.

Y/N tilted her head at his explanation.

"Keep you company? You mean like this?"

Not expecting her to get up and suddenly straddle his lap, Yunho's eyes shot wide open when her chest was practically pressing against his face. Y/N gently caressed the hair around his temples, not so subtly grinding herself on his tent that was hardening even further. His friend next to him was equally surprised and jealous that it wasn't his lap that the young lady chose to situate herself on.

"Is this what you wanted?"

When Yunho shifted under her and stammered out an incoherent babble of words, Y/N took hold of his hands and placed them on her hips.

"It's ok baby. You can touch me if you want. I don't mind." She encouraged him with a sweet smile on her face.

"I'm not sure I want to..." As soon as he said that, he regretted his words especially after seeing the disheartened look on Y/N's pretty face.

"Well I know for a fact I do so give her to me if you don't want her."

She let out a squeal when she was suddenly pulled of Yunho's lap and instead perched upon one of Wooyoung's strong and muscular thighs. He couldn't stop smiling as his hands rubbed against the sides of her waist.

"So tell me what's a gorgeous and young lady such as yourself doing in a place like this?" He was genuinely curious as to why someone like her would seek out work as an exotic dancer.

"Well it definitely brings in a lot of money, but I'm not going to deny that I do enjoy the attention and stares of some of the patrons like to give me." She answered, her hand reaching over to loosen up the tie around his neck.

"Oh, so you like being a little exhibitionist?" Wooyoung wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"God yes! But my ex boyfriend wasn't a fan of my occupation, hence why he left." She let out a tiny huff at the information.

"Well if you ask him he's an idiot for that. I know if I had a sexy girl like you, I wouldn't mind showing her off a little. Let others admire her like the goddess she is."

As he said those words to her, Wooyoung's fingers slowly peeled the straps of her top off her shoulders, his tips tracing along the outline of her collarbone. Y/N didn't budge when she felt Wooyoung's lips kiss across her shoulder and the side of her neck, she merely tilted her head to the opposite side so it would give him more access to suckle along her smooth skin. Yunho watched all of this with an aching hard on and clenched fist as he realized it could have been him in Wooyoung's position at that moment.

"Truthfully I don't miss him, he was very controlling anyways, but I gotta say...." She bit down on her lip, a bit unsure about continuing her sentence.

"It's ok baby. You can tell us anything you want." Wooyoung assured her as his teeth tugged at her earlobe.

Sucking in a breath she didn't know she was holding, Y/N spilled her secret out.

"I've just been a lot more horny ever since I started this job and I don't have anyone to fuck me like a slut. God I just want a big, fat cock to tear my pussy apart."

Both men looked at each other and exchanged a few suspicious glances before returning their attention back on the girl on Wooyoung's lap.

"Are you horny right now darling?" He asked her as his hand came to the front of her top and started undoing the buttons that ran through the middle.

"If I say yes, will one of you fuck me?" She turned her head to look at Yunho, not wanting him to feel left out. Her hand even reached over so it could brush along the tent in his pants, which he welcomed graciously and even allowed her to palm his hard on as she pleased.

"Oh honey, if you want, we'll both fuck you." Yunho finally spoke up after a long time of staying silent, scooting his body closer to her.

"Please do." She begged them, eyes looking like a pitiful little pup.

Undoing the last button, Wooyoung peeled the top off her, both men releasing groans when her breasts came into view. They looked so soft and smooth and it took everything in them not to take one in each of their mouths and devour them. Getting off of Wooyoung's thigh so she could sit right in between both men, Y/N took one of their hands and set them right on her mounds.

"Touch me, please. I want your guys' hands all over me."

Each one of the men began to squeeze at her tits, Wooyoung opting for a more rough approach, even pinching at her nipples, while Yunho took his time in massaging her flesh, thumb rubbing circles on her hardened peak. Y/N was already loving the two opposite dynamics both men were giving her, it was exactly what she'd been craving in a long time. She threw her head back when Wooyoung stooped down to take the breast he was currently toying with into his mouth, teeth tugging at her tiny bud. She was releasing heavy breaths as he continued to suck at her tender skin, eyes closing as she began to get lost in the pleasure. She nearly whined when she felt Yunho take his hand off her breast, but it was caught in his mouth since he moved his hand from her chest so it could cup her chin. Tilting it towards him, he began to kiss her hungrily. She gratefully welcomed the intrusion of his tongue in her mouth, letting it slither inside of it, taking complete control of her.

Taking advantage of his friend moving his hand away, Wooyoung moved so he was sitting right in front of her. Y/N pryed her legs open so he could be easily accommodated between her body. He moved his mouth to latch onto her other breast, giving it the special attention its twin had already received. He became a little harsher as he began to plaster marks on the underside of her boob and on the top of them. Each time he sank his canines down onto her skin, Y/N would emit a semi pained whimper that was muffled by Yunho's tongue as it swirled against her own wet muscle. Moving further south, Wooyoung began dragging his tongue down her sternum until it reached her belly button. Coming face to face with her leather shorts, Wooyoung grabbed the sides of the fabric before swiftly pulling it down her legs. Y/N shuddered when a small waft of cool air breezed over her wet heat.

"Fucking hell, what a nice and wet pussy you have little lady." Wooyoung stared in amazing at her shining folds that were inviting him to dive in and feast upon their sweet juices.

Pulling away so he could glimpse down at the lady's intimate place, Yunho moaned deeply when he saw what his friend was looking at.

"Fuck we've barely done anything and you're already this wet for us? You flatter us baby." He chuckled as he went back in to continue their makeout session.

Wooyoung's fingers slid around her folds, teasing her as they grazed over her slit, always stopping before they touched her clit. Y/N was yearning to be touched and she did not appreciate the older man's teasing. Yunho of course noticed since her needy whining was being spilled into his mouth.

"Is that a promise?" Wooyoung challenged.

"Wooyoung stop making her wait and eat her out before I shove you to the ground and I finger her cunt until she's squirting all over your face." He warned in between kisses.

Pulling back with a snarl, Yunho stared menacingly at his friend.

"Fucking eat her pussy or I'll get my men to hold you down and make you watch as I fuck her."

Shrugging off Yunho's threat, Wooyoung latched his mouth onto the young female's mound and started fucking it with his tongue. Y/N couldn't help but gasp as Wooyoung's skillful and experienced tongue swirled and sucked along her folds. He made sure to focus most of his attention on her clit, nibbling down on it while making sure he didn't accidentally grazed his teeth onto them.

"You like the way Wooyoung is eating you out baby?" Yunho asked as his large hands cupped your breasts once more, squishing them together as his thumbs toyed with your nipples.

"Yes! Shit! He's amazing!" She gasped out when he gave her a particularly long suck to thank her for her praises, a cocky grin forming.

"Heard that Woo? The little lady is enjoying it." Yunho gushed as he brought one breast up to place kisses on it.

Wooyoung responded with a moan against her pussy, his hands spreading her legs as far as they could go so he could lap reach every inch of flesh with his tongue. He left no place untouched as he practically smothered his face into her juicy core. Y/N's body started to tremble as she felt herself being thrown over the precipice. Yunho kept holding onto her as she began cumming on Wooyoung's face.

"Fuck- oh shit!" She cursed with scrunched eyes as an intense orgasm took over her senses.

Wooyoung didn't detach his mouth from her core until he made certain that she had released all the juices she possibly could, which ultimately ended up swallowed by him since he could not leave a drop to waste. When Y/N came to her senses, she still felt as if she was in a permanent high.

"I've never came from someone eating my pussy out. That was the first time anyone has made me orgasm from one." She admitted rather shyly.

"That's probably because you've only had amateur assholes perform oral on you honey. I've got years of experience. I know what a girl wants when she's getting her sweet pussy eaten out." Wooyoung boasted as he sat down next to her.

"Well I think it's only fair I show my gratitude to you both right?"

Sliding off the couch, Y/N got on her knees and beckoned the men to stand at each of her sides. Lifting her hands up, she began to palm their clothed cocks. She could only imagine how big they were since they already felt pretty packed even in their confinement. Although it was a little hard doing it with one hand, she managed to unzip both of their pants and slowly dragged them down their thighs until she was blessed by the sight of their mature cocks springing forward, fully erect and waiting for her to touch them. Her mouth was agape as she took one in each hand and began pumping them.

"God you're both so big."

Both men let out small laughs at her reaction.

"What? Never seen cocks like ours before baby?" Wooyoung asked.

"Not in person and I've always wanted to be fucked by sizes like yours."

Her hand continued to stroke their lengths. She even went as far as to spit on both of them so it would be easier to glide her hand along their shaft. Although Yunho was definitely the bigger of the two, packing a monster sized cock, Wooyoung was also pretty endowed and she had no doubt that with his cocky attitude he definitely knew how to use his dick in the best way possible. She couldn't help herself and actually brought both of their tips to her mouth. Her tongue alternated between licking Wooyoung's head before giving attention to Yunho's, both of them hissing when they felt her tongue on them. Y/N did not shy away from even slurping one both of them at the same time, opening her mouth as much as it could to fit their heads inside and sucking them in.

"Oh shit! You're such a dirty little girl." Yunho muttered out as his hand came down to pet the top of her head.

"Tell me are you always such a whore for your other customers?" Wooyoung's tone had a slight hint of jealousy at the thought of someone else getting the special treatment they were getting.

"Hmmm no. None of the other people have ever interested me. You guys are the first that made me wanna get a little naughty." She confessed with an innocent smile before taking each of their balls and giving them a few harsh sucks, coating them generously with her saliva. Although it was more than arousing having their young companion jerk them off simultaneously, even giving their slits a couple licks every now and then, the men knew they wanted a little more. They wanted to corrupt the woman in front of them and make a mess all over her.

"You wanna get even more naughty baby?" Yunho's voice dropped down 2 tones as he began taking his shirt off, Wooyoung following suit.

"Yes." She looked between one of the men and then to the other, nearly drooling when she saw their fit abs come into her view.

Lifting her up, Yunho effortlessly sat her back down on the couch.

"Want us to fuck you?" He continued to ask as he and his friend finished stripping themselves out of their clothes.

"Yes! Please fuck me." She encouraged, beckoning them over as she got on all fours for them.

"Well I don't know about you, but I really wanna see what that pretty mouth of hers does, especially after getting a sneak peak." Stepping over to her face, Wooyoung rubbed the tip of his cock along the top of her lip.

Y/N giggled as she took Wooyoung's length in one of her hands once more, pressing kisses along his head. She was so distracted in playing around and teasing Wooyoung that she didn't notice Yunho had placed himself right behind until she felt his bulge rubbing along her ass cheeks.

"I hope you don't mind sweetheart, but I wasn't expecting to get so lucky to be able to fuck a pretty girl such as yourself tonight so I'm afraid I brought no condoms...."

Y/N gasped when she felt a long finger insert itself into her ass.

"So I'm going to have to settle for fucking this other hole of yours." He circled his finger around her hole to further stretch her out, eventually adding a second finger inside her.

"If that's all right with you of course."

Y/N responded with a moan and pushed her butt further back so his fingers could sink deeper in her.

"I'd say it's more than ok with her. Look at how desperate she looks." Wooyoung lightly giggled, tapping the head of his cock against both of her cheeks.

"Open up."

Following his orders, Y/N allowed him to slip himself into her warm and wet mouth, unable to help but groan when he pushed half of his length in.

"What's wrong baby? Can't fit all of me inside?"

Taking it as a challenge, Y/N hollowed her cheeks even further and pushed herself forward until her nose pressed against his pubic bone. Although she choked slightly when she felt him hit the back of her throat, she was still able to swirl her tongue around him and properly accommodate him.

"For someone so young, you sure do seem to have a lot of experience." Wooyoung pointed out as his hands gently caressed her stuffed cheeks.

"That's cause she's nothing but a whore."

Y/N clenched around nothing as she heard Yunho's degradation, humming against Wooyoung's length as she felt his long fingers collect some of her slick and used it as a makeshift lube to spread around her asshole. Making sure she was all prepped and properly stretched out, Yunho took his sizeable dick and very slowly pushed himself into her ass, wanting to savor how her tightness hugged every inch of him. His head was thrown back when he stuffed her ass full of his cock, nails digging into her cheeks as he held back the urge to ram himself brutally and tear her ass up. When he did not move for a few seconds, Y/N grew impatient and pulled herself off him only to stuff him back inside.

"Don't make our pretty baby wait by being gentle Yunho. Can't you see she's desperate to have you break her apart?" Wooyoung smirked as pulled out of her mouth only to force himself back in, holding her head in place before releasing her. Y/N gagged around his cock, a tiny slick of drool falling out of the corners of her mouth.

"Is that what you want? Want us to be rough with you?"

Yunho got a response in the form of a moan around Wooyoung's dick and a tightening around his own cock .

"Ok shit! Yunho you better start fucking her cause I can't hold back anymore."

Not caring to wait and see if his friend would follow his instructions, Wooyoung gripped the back of Y/N's head and started bucking his hips into her mouth. Garbled noises that were muffled by Wooyoung's intrusion were spilling forth out of her, which were further intensified in range when the male behind her likewise started moving.

"Oh shit! You're so tight, you feel amazing little lady." Yunho praised as he slammed his hips onto her ass, watching it smack against his skin and wiggle every time he pounded back into her.

Y/N whimpered when one of Yunho's hands snaked in between her thighs and began to rub circles around her clit, further boosting the feeling they were giving her. With one of them fucking her face and the other one ramming into her ass, she felt so full and stuffed to the brim and she absolutely loved it.

"You enjoying this honey? Are you enjoying as two older men use you as their fuck toy?" Wooyoung's question was met by a loud vibration of her whimpers around him, his cock twitching at the feeling.

"Of course she's enjoying it. She loves getting used and treated as nothing more than a cum bucket." Yunho groaned in a raspy voice. His fingers which were moving earnestly around her bundle of nerves moved to strike them, making their recipient shudder when more stinging slaps were placed on her mound.

Tears of pleasure were rolling down Y/N's eyes as she was being fucked past her limit by the older and dangerous criminals. Never in her life did she actually believe such men like them would fulfill one of her deepest fantasies, yet here she was, gurgling and swallowing around one huge dick while her ass was getting torn apart by an even bigger cock. Not to mention Yunho was making sure she'd be tipped over the edge again as he worked his fingers on her clit, alternating between rubbing harshly against it before slapping it once more. During one of these hard smacks, she began crying out as her body began spasming and bursting out in pleasure, her juices spilling out of her.

"Oh fuck! She's cumming already." Wooyoung's words were becoming more slurred as he felt his own high fast approaching.

"I know. I'm gonna cum-" Yunho grunted as he plunged himself faster in her, his low and deep moans mixing with Wooyoung's higher pitched ones as both men used their pretty dirty dancer to push themselves over the edge, their relentless pace only helping to elongate the orgasm the girl under them was having.

"Fuck! Fuck!" Pulling out with a hiss, Yunho wrapped his hand around his cock and pumped himself furiously until white spurts of cum were being plastered all over her ass cheeks. He didn't stop until he made sure to paint her butt with all the cum he had to give.

Meanwhile, Wooyoung held her head in place as he fucked his own cum down her throat.

"Swallow it all you dirty whore. I don't want you spilling out a single drop. Got it?" He ordered as he spilled his seed into her mouth, which Y/N promptly swallowed as he said to. She kept eye contact throughout the entire process of having him rut his hips against her face, his mouth agape and blurting out swear after swear as he emptied himself in her mouth.

A popping sound was made when he pulled out of her, saliva plastered all over her lips which were red and swollen after the rough treatment they were put through. Both men slumped down on the couch to catch their breath and collect their senses. Yunho was the first one to gain his energy back and began to look for something to clean up, luckily finding a few hand towels near the mini bar. Coming back over where the other two occupants were, he began wiping off the leftover cum on Y/N's ass.

"You doing ok babe?" Yunho wanted to make sure.

"I'm doing wonderful, thank you." She giggled when Yunho pressed a light slap on her ass at her response.

After making sure to clean up properly, Yunho and Wooyoung gathered their clothes and began dressing themselves again while the exotic dancer simply sat there and watched them, lip poked out in a pensive thought.

"Will I see you guys some other night?"

Yunho and Wooyoung looked back and forth between each other and at her.

"Do you wanna see us again?" Wooyoung asked, his hopes getting up.

Y/N smiled at him.

"Of course I do. Just be sure to bring condoms next time. I'd really love to feel you both destroy my pussy next time."

The men chuckled at her bold words.

"Oh baby, it'll be our pleasure."

♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡♡*:.｡..｡.:*♡

[dare-to-dm]

Me and a DM friend of mine got to talk for a while. We're both DMs, but I almost never play, and I explained to him that this was because I am very attention seeking (which I can't control very well), and this is very bad if you need to share the DM's attention with 3 other people. We tried to think of ways to deal with this, but haven't really found any good ideas, do you have any ideas?

Supporting Attention Seeking Players

Sure thing!

There are things both the DM and the Attention Seeking Player (ASP) can do to help everyone have a good time.

The DM can:

Engage with the ASP outside of the game itself. This way, the player gets some of that focused attention they love in a way that enhances the game. This can include asking the ASP about their backstory, maybe doing some collaborative world building, talking about something cool that happened during the session, getting feedback about the campaign, talking about cool things they want to happen, discussing character builds, etc. Most DMs love having someone to talk to about their craft, and there's plenty to discuss about a campaign without getting spoilerific. This can be very enjoyable for both parties.

Put the Attention Seeking Player to work. Giving the ASP a task to do during the game can channel their energy into something positive and give your more time/attention to split with everyone else. Maybe you could ask them to track and display initiatives, or take notes, or coordinate splitting loot, or mentor/assist another player. Be sure to thank the ASP for taking on this helping role.

Use Attention as a Reward. Make sure to intentionally give the ASP attention when they are being a good teammate and player. On the flip side, ignore them or call them out if you notice them talking over others or trying to hog the spotlight. I wrote a couple posts about using rewards and punishments to encourage the kind of play you want to see at your table.

The Attention Seeking Player Can:

Practice Self Awareness. If you know you struggle with wanting to be the center of attention all the time, make a conscious effort to be considerate to your fellow players. Listen when they speak, try not to talk over them, and make an effort to keep things moving along. Don't beat yourself up if you catch yourself slipping up, just apologize and move on, e.g. "Sorry, Chris, I didn't mean to interrupt you. You go". Your fellow players will almost always be understanding if they can tell you are making an effort.

Be a Cheerleader. If you want to be a part of every scene, there are ways to do that without always hogging the spotlight. Cheer on and encourage your fellow players! It keeps you actively participating, but lets your friends feel like super stars as well. Don't forget to praise your DM too!

Ask Permission for Attention. If you're reading this, you're probably aware that there are times when attention seeking can come off as annoying or selfish. But you should also know that there are times people will be happy to give you their attention - genuinely. Not just tolerating you or humoring you, but genuinely happy to witness your enthusiasm. When in doubt, ask.

"Can I tell you about my backstory?"

"I have some ideas for this setting. Would you like to hear them?"

"Ooo, do you guys mind if I do a monologue here?"

Sometimes, they'll let you know that now isn't a good time for it, and that's okay. And sometimes, it'll be perfect.

Remember your Value. Having players that engage enthusiastically with the campaign is lifeblood to a roleplaying game. You are the reason the DM works so hard to craft a fun experience. You are a star bringing their vision to life. You are awesome! Just remember you are part of an ensemble cast, and everyone else needs time to showcase their talents as well.

Thanks for the question!

[oonajaeadira]

Long Fall Into Oblivion (Ezra x reader)

(header by sirtadcooper - check out the whole beautiful set here.)

Rating: Mature. 

Pairing: Ezra (post-Prospect film) x f!reader

Warnings: Non-explicit sex. Some swears maybe (think there’s a f*ck in there somewhere, my GOODNESS). A lot of gooey, syrupy, soft fluffety fluff. Author attempts at writing Ezra dialogue. A lot of chewy prose.

A/N: I can’t believe I’m posting this, but here goes. I love Ezra. He is a man of questionable morality and an insufferable tongue and I really shouldn’t. But I really do. I just wanted to give him a try. I’ve softened him up here, putting a few years on him so maybe he’s fluffed up some since the events in the film. Also I just ignored the fade or assumed that aurelac mining was still happening because scarcity/demand. Doesn’t matter. Just wanted to go exploring.

Summary: You take a job as an aurelac prospecting trainee and Ezra shows you the ropes. You’re gonna fall in love with him. That’s it. That’s the whole thing.

TAGLIST: you can always request to be on the taglist for this or any of my work. If you’d like to be on taglists for upcoming fic, please sign up here –> TAGLIST

MASTERLIST

________________

Bakhroma is one of the smallest gas giants in the sector, but as you stand on the surface of the Green Moon, it dominates the entire horizon, pulling your focus, threatening to engulf everything around it. You almost feel sorry for the lush moon as you walk through its undergrowth, so gentle and full of beauty, destined many years after you’re gone to give its life to her.

A moon is an orbiting admirer, and what is an orbit but a long fall to oblivion?

There’s a painful, sour ache in your heart as you walk back to the camp in twilight, watching the back of Ezra’s helmet bob along in front of you. You’d spent two days digging that claim only to find the weakest aurelac nest you’ve seen yet, only three viable nodes. You’d dug through one of them by accident and completely melted another like an incompetent fool. Kevva’s ass, you were such a disappointment. Three months in the Green and you still can’t cut a blister out properly. Not even once.

Ezra’s shoulders are wide and tense, his one hand splayed out as he walks, running over the tops of the tall ferns, catching one every now and then only to rip the top away, twirl it between his gloved fingers and toss it impatiently aside.

The other two members of your team headed out on a sling this morning, another two will be arriving in a few days. And you wonder if Ez regrets just not cutting his losses and leaving with them, or at least sending you back in exchange for another kip.

You think about shifting through the comm channels, hoping that he’s chattering away in one of them, switched without your knowledge, but it’s a lost cause. You can hear him breathing on the channel between you. It’s not often Ezra has nothing to say.

________________

You thought your father was leaving you an inheritance. It’s not the reason you took care of him through his illness, but you’d dropped everything to be back home with him through his final months. In a way, it was a blessing, a reason to quit the Dasha factory and the terrible working conditions there, come back home and focus on your dad, relive good memories, just spend time. The reconnection lifted your heart, but his death sank it low again. When you learned he had nothing to leave you but a small house and some old vehicles, you sold what you could and traded in the rest.

Then you had nothing. No family, no job, little savings, questionable future. It almost broke your spirit. But the last few months with your father rekindled your love of him as he told you about his years in the Fringe, mining and prospecting. And your heart had said, “what the hell, let’s try that.” So you listened.

It took some time to track down the right inroads, but you were able to find some ads for prospecting teams, in particular those who were willing to take on members in training for a re-distributed cut. With all provisions included--other than suit and gear, which your father’s inheritance neatly covered--it seemed like just as good of a deal as any, and an adventure to boot.

But the reality was, every team you met with was full of hardened men, and while you were not a soft Central woman, you also weren’t overly versed in weaponry and didn’t know if you could defend yourself out in the Fringe against attack if things got crusty.

You were just about ready to admit defeat when you walked into yet another conference bunker and found your match. The first thing you noticed was that he was standing when you arrived, waiting for you politely rather than manspread at the table. Second were his eyes. Deep, brown, and sad. Maybe sad was the wrong word, certainly it seemed by the lines in his face, possibly by the missing arm, that he’d seen enough sadness, but toward you, it read more as concern. You wouldn’t know it until later when he confessed his feelings about this first meeting, but he was worried you wouldn’t choose him. Ezra had a hell of a time hiring partners. He may have been one of the longest-working aurelac diggers out there, but young kippers saw his greying beard and seasoned diggers saw his lacking arm and they all tended to turn around and walk out before he even said hello. So he’d tried to put himself out there as a trainer, show that he had something more to offer.

It didn’t hurt his feelings when you admitted to him later that those qualities were exactly why you chose him. He seemed the opposite of threatening. And his eyes were bright when he smiled at you. With his thrumming baritone and his Fringe twang and his mixed deck of mosaic words, he had a way of speaking that felt like a fluffy blanket curling around you, your brain vibrating with comfort at every new monologue. He was eccentric and perhaps a little jarringly rough in his humor at times, but there was something about him that you trusted immediately, even though you’d come to learn later you probably shouldn’t have if you were being overly cautious.

Not that your judgement ever came to detriment. Not that he ever proved you wrong that way. Not when it came to you. But the man was dangerous when he had to be in a way you hadn’t initially picked up on.

________________

You hadn’t been out in the Green two weeks before you looked up from the bottom of a dig hole to see Ezra standing over you with a thrower.

“You get down and you stay down, understand?”

“Ez? What--”

“I said stay down! Do not make me waste words on mere repetition!” The fuzzy blanket of his voice replaced suddenly by a snarling, snapping brush wolf, a quick change hitting you like a slap in the ear.

There’d been pops and whizzes as shots rang through and you did as your trainer said, face down, the view of your visor giving you nothing but dirt. Your helmet was a chorus of quick breathing from both of you and sweat rolled down your neck as you begged the eyes of Kevva to look down upon your partner. When the crossfire faded, you’d heard Ezra stalk away. Then there were a couple more shots. Then more footsteps returning.

“You are permitted to stand, trinket. All is well as it can be for us. But not so much for our dearly departed friends.” These words were as soothing as much as his previous ones had burned, and he simply went back to working at the dig at hand as if he’d just come back from taking a leak. It wasn’t until you left the site that evening that you tramped past two rotting raiders, gaudily outfitted with broken face shields, left to let the Green take them.

Ezra whistled as he stepped over them, stopping only to harvest their filters and munition rods, which he tossed your way to stow in your pack, and then continued lazily down the path toward camp. Just another day on the job. 

He may be a little peculiar and not someone to trifle with, he may have just killed two people without remorse or further comment, but his lack of reassuring words told you that this was just part of the deal. You wear the suit, you use the air scrubber in the tent, you follow the landing pod instructions as written, and you defend yourself against those who wish to harm you. Survival by any and all means is paramount, mundane, and something he has no qualms with on any level.

There was something deep down inside of you that instinctually pulled you to follow him, not just down the literal path before you, but whatever path Ezra chose to wander.

________________

Before you’d left the station with him, he’d taken you to a thrower range to gauge your skill which was decent in theory, but dismal compared with what he could do. No matter, he still patiently taught you how to properly clean and charge a weapon and the best way to breathe and pull the trigger; “like you’re taking hold of a man’s...well... Just go easy and firm.” He suggested you should come and practice every day before lift off and then hope to Kevva that you didn’t have to rely too heavily on it.

“If I find myself in a coffin of my own suit, then feel free to defend yourself as a final means of preservation. Otherwise, when it comes down to shots fired, best to let me do the dirty work. Might as well keep the blood where the blood has been.”

You’d been a little nervous about sharing a freighter pod alone with him, but Ezra was...well, not so much a gentleman as just a comfortable soul. 

He always waited until you were hungry to eat, thinking it rude to eat alone in front of you. He never moved around the pod while you were sleeping, content to keep still with a book in his cot. And if you couldn’t sleep, he was always willing to read to you from whatever impossibly dense old world classic he was digging through for the umpteenth time, letting his voice come up from the deeps and pull you gently under. If you asked permission to turn on the radio, he’d ask you “why Isn’t it on yet, woman,” quietly tolerating your taste in harsh and gleeful babblecore pshcyopop. In the later days of the journey, he’d even come to dance with you from time to time, although both of you were dismal at it and ended up with you in a fit of giggles. It was a sure-fire way to cure a case of the pouts you carried through from the morning fitness sessions when he beat you at pushups. Again.

When it came to privacy in the tight space, he had a habit of turning away without having to be asked or stopping his stream of talk when you went to change clothes, just happily chattering away until you called the all clear. Although he was not squeamish about his own state of undress, should you happen to catch it by accident. While he was respectful of your privacy, he seemed to need none of his own, but neither did he flaunt anything. You might look up from studying the flight manual to notice he was changing into a fresh pair of compression pants, tugging them on haphazardly with one hand, more concerned with telling you the overwhelmingly disgusting manufacturing process of Bits Bars than his own ass hanging out where you might see it. At least he always changed facing away from you which was a kindness.

Until it wasn’t.

After you realized you’d fallen quietly in love with him--a sudden, soft moment on the Green--then you’d admit only privately to yourself that you wouldn’t mind if you accidentally saw a little more than the occasional shirtless attire he might wear around the tent.

But in the pod, the only part of him that had caught your curiosity was his stump, and you’d known Ezra intensely enough over the past couple of weeks where you knew he wouldn’t take offense. Especially if you asked him the right way.

“Will you tell me a story, Ezra?”

“I feel that it is my duty to do so whether you ask me to or not. Shall I choose, or is there something in particular you would like to hear?”

He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, propped up against his cot, going through his kit, cleaning his gear. You waited until he noticed your lack of answer and looked up to meet your eyes. When he saw that you had put your manual down and were focusing all your quiet attention on him, he stopped his busy work. 

When Ezra gives you his attention, it is absolute. When he knows you seriously need something from him, that becomes his immediate main priority and all else can wait. It’s only gotten more intense since that day, but there is a trust that resides between you when you look into his eyes, gathering your words as he waits patiently every time to hear whatever you’re going to request of him. There’s always hope there in his big browns, always something specific he’s waiting for you to ask, and every day you get a little bit closer to understanding what it might be. But until then, any question is a welcome one, any query is met with his wish to provide.

“Will you tell me how you lost your arm?”

At first you thought you may have gone too far, that maybe you insulted him, as his eyebrows peaked together and he looked down at his hand. But then, “That is a tale that may cause you some consternation, trinket. The Green is dangerous and unforgiving, and there were times I may not have been a man worthy of fair opinion.”

“My father was a prospector, you know. I’ve heard stories. Have you ever killed anyone?”

He clicked his tongue and screwed up an eye, causing the thin white scar on his cheek to twist. Then he sighed and returned to your locked gaze. “To be honest, I have. Though I have never done so with pleasure, I have killed in defense and out of desperation, and it was out of dispatching a man in this way that I came to lose the second favorite of all my appendages.”

“Second favorite?”

“Well, it depends what you classify as a limb.” He huffed a small laugh, a spark in his eye, trying to diffuse the harsh subject in his own way.

His leaning into baseness never bothered you. There was something earthy about it, gritty and rough, but never lewd. You rewarded his crassness with a smile. “Do you plan on killing me out in the Green?”

“I would hope my murdering days are behind me, and if they are not, you would see me aim a thrower at everyone but you in the course of my spree. You are under my tutelage, and for that, I owe you a duty of care. That is my word by Kevva.”

“Then tell me the story. I like your stories. I promise not to judge now-Ezra by then-Ezra.”

A dimple formed on his cheek, a punctuation mark framing the approaching anecdote on his lips. “Then I will declare myself absolved of any sin heretofore and regale you with a clean and grateful heart.”

________________

You can see the tent through the trees and you realize with some horror that it’s just you and Ezra for the next few nights. If he’s angry with you, and this is how he is when he’s upset, the silence will be unbearable.

Even that little girl he helped out here years ago was probably more capable than you. You feel so lost in this moment, and it’s only made worse by his silence. You fumble with your communicator and hit the mute just in time to choke on a sob.

This isn’t like you. You’re not one to cry when things get rough. You hardly shed a tear when your father died. But the thought of that just brings another sob and as acting as your own psychologist you realize that you are experiencing some displaced sorrow, the odd need to please the leading male in your life, the one that’s walking ahead of you, away from you. If he’d just turn around and throw you his worn weary smile, if he’d just start up a conversation you’d know that there was hope for you, you’d know you didn’t give up everything to be here in a job you couldn’t hack.

You gotta stop this. Or it’s going to be an uncomfortable night.

Shake it off.

Once you enter the tent, the usual dance happens. Ezra reaches up to turn on the air scrubber and you unhook his filter tube from his helmet. When he turns to you, you pull open the zipper cover on his suit and start his zip for him before lifting his helmet up and off. He can pull the zip the rest of the way, but you generally pull the left collar down for him so he can get his arm out. He’s on his own from there as you turn to fuss with your own gear. 

________________

You remember it starting easily enough. He was telling you a story about the breeding habits of the Tokovian Musk Owl and you could see he was having trouble with his suit zipper, yanking at it and trying to look down at it even though it was under his chin and his helmet. Without another hand to keep the fabric taut, the zip didn’t want to release, so you simply batted his hand away and started it for him. He didn’t even stop his yammering, just threw in a “thank you” somewhere in between “could hear them screeching” and “for a fuck.” He’d right out asked you the day before if you wouldn’t mind disengaging the filter tube just because it was delicate and he didn’t want to mangle the expensive part trying to pop it out one-handed day after day. And while he could manage the helmet fine enough, his prominent nose thanked you for a smoother removal for sure. 

It wasn’t the only routine dance you’d concocted. 

There was the harness dance.

While dig days were excruciating, you always looked forward to helping him attach the harness for his prosthesis--a kind of rigid pole attached to a shovel so you didn’t have to do all the hard digging alone. There were a couple of straps that came around his torso with multiple latches and you’d come to really enjoy wrapping your arms around him to fit the straps on. Sure, you could do the job just as easily from behind, but if you embraced him at the front, he’d usually raise his arm and let it come to rest around your shoulders while you worked. If you let yourself dream, it would be easy to imagine that he might be pressing you into him just a little bit.

And there was the harvesting dance.

On a dig, you were the one to mix the fazer and Ezra did the pour. He fished the sack, you cut the cord. You sliced the outer casing and held it open while he did the extraction. And with the flesh-covered stone, he told you every time to “hold it like you love it” so he could cut away the slippery blister before cleaning the gemstone.

It was a beautiful harmony. And the only way it worked. Because once on every dig he urged you to do a solo extraction, and on every dig, you pierced the blister and lost that stone. And on every dig, he squeezed your shoulder and told you it was a wondrous try, that he was proud of you, and there would always be another turn. There was no sarcasm, no pity, just a warm smile and ceaseless optimism even though you just lost both of you thousands in pay.

These were the first touches, these shoulder squeezes that ran down your arm on the let-go. Sometimes he would just reach out and grab onto you like a pole to help himself up, or he might stumble off balance on uneven ground and without the counterweight of his right arm he’d throw his hand out onto you to steady himself. He wasn’t beyond lightly touching the small of your back to encourage you down a path or to take your next try at a gem pull. 

This was all part of something you’ve secretly named the left-handed-lover’s dance. Basically, that you keep on his left whenever you can in case he needs your help or has the inclination to reach for you. It started out as just trying to be a good partner. Then it became a passing hope that it was more than just a friendly bond. But you were both here to do a job. He was here to teach you to be an independent prospector and you were here to assist and learn. That was evident at the end of the day; once you were both in the tent and out of the suits he never touched you, never so much as bumped into you or grazed your hand in passing an item or clapped you on the arm after a good joke. 

But out in the field all zipped in and helmets on, there was nothing more natural than his gentle hand guiding you or reaching for your assistance, including the day you realized you loved him.

________________

Before you can turn away to strip off your own coverings, Ezra catches your arm, spinning your face into the light. You try to shake him off, not wanting him to catch your eyes puffy from crying and your cheeks still streaked with tears, but his grip is not so gentle now and he yanks you back around to his stormy glare, chin up, brows low. His intensity paralyzes you, rendering you unable to continue your struggle when he catches your eyes with his.

When Ezra gives you his attention, it is absolute.

His gaze travels back and forth between your eyes, waiting for an explanation, a minute so stringent it breaks you down, dissolves you into the tears you’d tried so hard to hide.

“I’m sorry, Ezra. I really am trying... I don’t know why I’m such a scuffer at this and I know it would only be right to release you from the contract and tell you to send me back but I don’t want you to, I really wanna stay, I really wanna learn and I’m so, so sorry.”

Your words have an immediate effect, softening him, pulling his glare into concern and wonder, his lips parting just the tiniest bit in surprise.

“This is the reason for your heavy mood? You think I am provoked by your proficiency in the field?” 

“I crusted up good today and it seems like you’re not happy about it. Just...know that it means so much to me that...I don’t wanna let you down.”

“Oh, trinket, no.” An incredulous huff jumps out of him and his grip on your arm loosens, becomes a splayed warm support behind your shoulder, moving in soothing patterns and you’re instantly relieved that your assumptions were wrong. “You have done no harm in my book. It is not an easy thing to deliver a gem of this ilk into the world unscathed. Your opportunities have been few and scattered and it takes many sticks before a lover becomes a lothario.” He knows the crass humor will make you laugh, knows what to say to lighten your heart, to get you to soften, and bring you into his intimate, conspiratorial mood. “To be perfectly honest, I am selfish to an unrighteous degree, for every gem you burn keeps me in value to you. A worthy sacrifice to guarantee you mightn’t be so quick in your need to fly away from me until your training’s complete.”

This causes a hitch in your breath as you see the welcome turn the conversation he’s taking and you follow the path he’s making for you. “I don’t want to leave you, Ez.”

A smile creeps up one side of his mouth. “Well then I am a happy man. A bargain is struck! Partners it is.”

“Partners it is.”

A moment hangs between you as he rubs his thumb in slow circles on your shoulder. There’s that look in his eye again, the one where he’s waiting for you to ask the question he wants to hear from you. So close now.

Still, you’re unsure. “I guess I’m lucky I found the one person who wants an incompetent partner.”

“No, I do not, nor is it what I have and I must express my objection to your self-debasement. This work is not for the shiny, and you have not once complained about taking on the meat of the digging or the crawl of my schedule.”  His hand comes to your helmet shield and he rakes his thumb across it as if he ached to wipe away one of your staleing tears. “Those bright eyes of yours got a penchant for spotting deposits more skillfully than I could ever manage and that’s not something that can be taught; that’s talent, girl. The blistering?” He shrugs. “Even I can’t manage that without the steady help of your fine hands. You may think that your blunders in education are causing us some financial ruin, but our fortunes are creamy. I assure you, we can afford it.”

That look is still there. He’s waiting. “There’s some ‘us’ and ‘we’ in there, Ez.” Your hands drift to his sides, taking fistfuls of his compression suit top, willing him closer.

The edges of his eyes take on the crinkle you’ve come to find so much comfort in. “So there is.”

You’re almost there. You know what he wants. “Why were you so quiet on the walk back?” 

“Because for the next few days we are alone here and I have a mind full of questions I do not know how to ask you.”

“Then let me go first.” A yearning happiness settles in his brown eyes; finally. Finally you’ve found out what it is he needs you to request of him. “If I take this helmet off, are you going to kiss me, Ez?”

His eyes close in contentment and he nods, “Yes. Yes, little jewel. Yes I am, that and more. I hope I have inferred correctly that it is your wish that I do so, because I am in free fall. I feel my orbit ending and my pull to you is complete.”

_______________

“A moon is an orbiting admirer, and what is an orbit but a long fall to oblivion?”

Speculating days were some of your favorite times, just wading through the brush and looking for the telltale signs and shoots of an underlying deposit. Sometimes you came upon nests of strange groundling insects or flowers that only grew in secret. There were treasures underfoot on this poisonous moon, but if you remembered to look up as well, you might find some dangerous beauties there too. 

On that day--the one where you finally understood your heart--you’d looked up to find that you were on a cliffside overlooking a valley, the canopy a million different hues of green, the gas giant looming over half the sky in a big pink and orange semi-circle. There was a fallen log that served as a perfect seat for the perfect view and you knew Ezra wouldn’t mind if you stole a few moments to sit and to take it in. It’s just the kind of thing he’d appreciate. And you were proven right when he came up behind you, putting a hand on your shoulder to steady himself as he swung one leg then the other over the log, finding a perch next to you, spouting pretty words through the channel link--soft and low--about moons and orbits and obilvions.

“That glowing beauty is Bakhroma. She is quiet and fierce, made up of the unfathomable and the unknowable, always within sight, but out of reach and untouchable unless one would trade the honor with great sacrifice. She reflects the light that is given to her with a patience that is heretofore untold. And the Green Moon upon which we ride follows where she goes like a lovesick fool, spinning around her in a heady kind of adoration, full of secret treasures buried deep down that will ultimately one day belong to her, falling incrementally over eons until he finally loses himself in her, all his glories gladly forfeit to her welcome and inevitable embrace. Alone but together, seemingly eternal, pulled as one by the laws of a mysterious universe.”

The void that came after those words was filled with the beating of your heart, and you were sure he could hear it through the channel.

When he’d landed there beside you, you’d registered how his hand slid off your shoulder, diagonally down across your back, coming to rest at your waist, his arm draped lightly around you. Natural. Easy. Everything was warm--the colors of the sky, the care with which he kept you close as if to better hear the honey sweetness in his prose, the fire burning in your lungs and neck.

Ezra probably didn’t know that you spoke a little Vayok.

Bakh being the Vayok word for adornment. Ornament, Gem. Roma was a modifier, a diminutive. Small. Dear.

Bakhroma. Sentimental bauble. A little jewel.

In other words, a trinket.

All you wanted to do was sit down to take in the view of an entire world for a few moments, but by the time Ezra took your hand and helped you to your feet, all you saw was him.

________________

The helmet is barely off before his lips are sealed to yours in a press of greed. Even if he can’t form words when he kisses you, he can’t help but express his deep relief in a heartbreaking moan. It’s a fight to release yourself from the suit when he keeps pulling you against him and every time you try to get some space between you to work the zipper, he chuckles into your mouth, enjoying the tease and the struggle. It’s simultaneously frustrating and thrilling and you give in for a few moments just to give him what he seems to want so desperately right now.

Ezra kisses like a man starved for air, long, hard, and full of need, peeling his lips away only to come back for another breath of you until his initial want is slaked and he slows, allows for more time between his taking, his mouth starting to mumble against yours, praising you with pet names, telling you how perfect you are to him, how long he’s “fought against my more dubious natures to respect your womanly virtues and take them only when you could see in me a man worth bestowing them on.”

You’re able to use his weakness for monologuing to turn around in his vice-like embrace, finally freeing yourself of the suit and he takes the opportunity to drawl more pretty words in your ear, warning you that “I’m afraid I have been enamored of you overly long and may be extra eager in my attentions. So you just say the word if you need a slow down, gentle one, and I will do my best to comply. Although I will admit it will be a difficult endeavor indeed as I feel I am entering your atmosphere and nothing might quell this burn but finding some drowning place to land.”

Your first impression of him was of a man whose age and temperament and body would not be able to overpower you.

Your first impression was wrong.

Of course, it helps that you are willing.

It doesn’t take long for him to strip you down, and then himself. To kiss you down onto the floor. To find exactly where you like to be touched most and how long it takes for you to break from it. He has so many words for you, so many praises to sing about every part of you that is round or soft or wet, comparing you to things that are sweet and plush or celestial and holy. And when you take his favorite limb in hand--as wondrous as the rest of his body--and guide it to its fit, he plunders and harvests all you have to give him, filing you with himself, for as long as you call for it, as long as you let him. He loves you like he speaks to you: rough and drawn out, full of beautiful tangents and meandering plotlines, but in the end it is beautiful and fulfilling; you may be just a little bit confused how you got to the ending, but you’re completely in awe.

When you lay breathing heavy, staring but not seeing the ceiling of the tent, your consciousness seemingly lifted to see through it to the stars, to the glowing face of Bakhroma, you run hands through rough-chopped hair on a head laying on your chest. He’s listening to your heartbeat, waiting for it to slow down so he can start again. The air is thick--even the air scrubber can’t keep up with all your humidity--and there’s a halo around each bulb of the string lights just barely illuminating the darkness.

“How long, Ez?”

“Hm?”

“How long have you been waiting for that.”

“Most likely since the day you walked into my interview. I am a man of simple wants and you had all the right parts for my preferences.”

“For real, Ez.”

He tipped his head up to find you. “What you ask has many true answers, and I stand by the first. I have no qualms telling you of my weakness for a pretty succulence and a kind smile the likes of which you possess. But if you are asking when I knew I would have it, well, that may have been the first day you danced. Or when you asked me to read you to sleep. Or when I understood I wouldn’t let those bastard raiders get near enough to take their turn at your qualities when I had not had them myself. Or when you finally saw me as a viable person to drape your affections on; maybe it was that day too.”

“When I finally saw you as....”

“I have read many tomes and verses but none so full of beautiful passages as your face that day on the cliff. There is a difference of knowing and being. I knew the feel of your pull that day, but found I’d been in orbit all along.”

How he can live this way, twist everything into a tossed away poem...it should be exhausting. Yet you feed off it. You breathe it like air.

After another long cycle of frenzied entanglement and violent euphoria, you ask Ezra if he’d like to move to a cot, maybe get some sleep. “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to walk to the dig tomorrow morning,” you confess.

“No need to worry about tomorrow,” he says, wapping his arm around you and dragging you back to him, grumbling into your ear. “We are the only prospectors in this sector and the aurelac will wait. Until our new compatriots arrive, we are officially on hiatus. Recreational mining only. Restricted to the confines of this tent. By order of your supervisor. In the interest of more precious treasures. And I intend to strike it rich.”

“Well. I’m here to assist. And learn.”

“When it comes to this dig, trinket, you are more than competent. I am no longer your trainer. Partners it is.”

“Partners it is.”

The new contract is struck, signed and sealed in kissing and in touch and a long, slow fall into inevitable oblivion.

[vidalinav]

Because You’re an Asshole (One-shot)

Contains ACOSF Spoilers. 

Look, Cassian needs to drink some respect Nesta Archeron juice (as they all do). I hope to god he gains some perspective in this book, and he doesn’t continue this stupidity of reducing Nesta to butchery status. (Raises glass) Here’s hoping this lug nut starts making an effort. But this fic is purely self-indulgent because well... I’m the fic writer. So I can do what I want. 

Summary: Nesta rejects Cassian in front of the Inner Circle (Takes place in my head a couple of months after first 6 chapters)

Nesta wouldn’t say she had changed much, but to her sister and their group of friends she’d say she might as well have been a different person. For they pretended not to stare as she arrived with Cassian in tow. Some extraterrestrial creature in the middle of a restaurant.

She greeted the owner, Sevenda, lifting her lips into a polite smile and nodding when she caught Nesta’s gaze.

“Hello, sweet girl,” The female gushed, “I didn’t think you were helping out today... please don’t tell me one of the others conned you into taking their shift.”

Nesta shook her head shyly as Cassian told the female they were meeting the rest of them for a late dinner. Sevenda kissed him on the cheek, and Nesta wondered how one person could show so much affection when she could barely muster a proper laugh.

Truthfully, the only reason she made it to this dinner at all was because Bryaxis had asked her to. He’d been in the middle of telling her how the stars moved on an axis, and how the shadows were often wandering souls. He had so many stories to tell in that dark place in the library, but he’d wanted stories too. He was persistent, pushy…persuasive and Nesta could not let down her new friend when all he wanted to do was know about the outside world.

Nesta knew enough about being ostracized. She felt for the monster for she was a monster too. Cast away to the darkened ends of the library.  

But, Nesta wanted this night to be over. She’d promised Bryaxis ten minutes and ten minutes only. She could survive that long on fake grins.  

She tried not to sigh audibly as Sevenda showed them to the table, where the others already sat. Laughing loudly... then quieting to silence as they neared.

Nesta should have felt offended. But she couldn’t find it in herself to care too much.

The night would be over soon enough anyways.

True, Amren had visited her in the library just last week and they’d been cordial. She saw Mor on a regular basis to winnow to Windhaven, and Azriel was always there. It seemed odd to her now that they stared as if she were someone new. Someone they didn’t know at all.

Perhaps, though, it was because she’d agreed to come in the first place and when she did, she’d allowed Cassian to accompany her there. Though she suspected the offer was more because they were all still wary of her change, her calmness.

Nesta wouldn’t have called it that herself.

She hadn’t stopped being angry, she’d been born angry. Raged and kicked her way to this world.

Nesta just merely stopped... fighting back.

There was a peace in that, she supposed. Even if the thought sometimes made her want to hurt something and then herself for letting it happen.

Most of the time she was just detached enough to smile when someone called her name and when they left she’d go back to staring off into space, the dust like hidden galaxies floating through the filtered sunlight. It was what Nesta liked about the library in truth. That most didn’t bother her when she’d looked out the array of windows, up on those tall ladders, ready to see Velaris in a tiny frame.

In this way, the world was a lot smaller than she’d realized.

Less frightening.

And because the world was less frightening, the people in it, too, were less mean. She’d wandered after her workday, tired, but with a furious curiosity for more, like a hunger she couldn’t satisfy, and she’d ended up here. At Sevenda’s--the female greeting her and offering her a meal, even when Nesta told her she didn’t have the money to pay.

On the house then, the female said.

It was the best meal she’d ever had and Nesta had come back every time she could. Helping with the books, with inventory, while the owner patted her on the shoulder, her cheek, and brought her something new to try. Like a doting grandmother.

It felt odd, she thought seeing the rest in a large booth to the wall. This place, too, did not belong to her...

“No need to order,” the female proclaimed, “I know what you all like.”

Nesta waited for Cassian to scooch into the booth before she sat on the outskirts. Easy access to the door. Easy to leave.

But the others didn’t bother her much. Distantly, as if Nesta was not in the room, she could hear their voices begin again. To each other of course. Never to her. Though she’d accepted it long ago that she would never be what they wanted. They would never be what she needed.  

Cassian laughed. The sound hurting her ears. He never laughed like that with her. Nesta supposed she wasn’t that funny… and she wasn’t really his friend.

Instead, Nesta looked to the restaurant. Alive in all it’s glory. Loud and bright. She looked to the waitstaff. Most of them she’d met already, worked with some of them, and they smiled or waved when they saw her. Nesta lifted her hand to greet them, too.

One of the girls, Amina, brought out waters for the table.

Amina grinned when she saw her there.

But she did not leave when the cups had been set. Instead, she lingered, lowering her voice and leaning  towards her. “We’re going to the symphony tomorrow if you want to come.”

“And you must come,” Sevenda said, coming from behind with a plate of appetizers in her hand. Something to tide them over.  

Nesta blinked at the two females, unsure of what to say—what to do.

“I’ve never been to symphony before,” Nesta answered.

Sevenda set the bread in the middle of the table, and then raised a hand to her chest dramatically. “You’ll just adore it. Grand tales, handsome males, intriguing music all around. Perhaps, I’ll gather more of the staff and we’ll make a whole day of it.”

Nesta shook her head, waving her hands slightly. “You’re pretty busy, you don’t have to—”

“Nonsense, sweet girl,” She said, raising a hand to Nesta’s cheek. She could feel the warmth on her face. “Nobody would be too busy for you.”

Nesta smiled at that, a testament to how much she had changed that she’d allowed the touch and a triumph at how Nesta felt something other than nothing at all.

“I’ll be right back,” Sevenda noted chipperly. “Eat some bread.”

As the female left, Nesta didn’t want to look at the rest of the group, didn’t want to see how they would judge her, didn’t want to see if she cared or not. They’d meant to heal her. Did they think they were successful?

Cassian gazed down at her, his eyes uncommonly fond. All Nesta thought was that she was probably not embarrassing any longer.

She wondered if seeing her tolerated by others made him realize that she was tolerable.

Because, Nesta had not been tolerable to him this morning.

“You know, we can go to the symphony,” Cassian suggested, the apples of his cheeks blooming a dust of red. Nesta’s brows furrowed at the words. Her lips tilting down into an expression that might have been quizzical. "Some time... together I mean.”

Nesta looked at the others, but it seemed they were trying not to snicker, or they were too curious at what she would do. Rhysand tried to hide his smirk, Azriel held onto the bridge of his nose, Mor raised a brow as if she couldn’t believe what she was hearing, Amren took a sip of wine, rolling her eyes, and Feyre... well Feyre looked to her.

Say something, her eyes seemed to say.

But Nesta went to gaze at the people around her, happy and conversing at their own tables. The noise a rum drum lur of heartbeats and shouts and quiet whispers of some things she’d never be able to listen to even if she tried to read their lips.

This was... life, she thought. A cacophony of angry yells and laughter.

She’d almost forgotten what it sounded like...

But it wasn’t because of him that she could now recognize the notes. A song Nesta desperately wanted to hear. It wasn’t because of them at this table... and Nesta wondered what made Cassian suggest this. In front of his friends.

Did he think she would not easily reject him?

Didn’t he know she was a private person?

“Cassian, what’s my favorite color?”

He simply blinked, surprised by her words. She waited for his answer, but it never came.  

Nesta continued.

“What’s my favorite drink?” She asked.

Still Cassian said nothing.

“What time do I usually get up in the morning? It’s certainly not the time I’m forced to train with you.”

Cassian didn’t answer and instead of it making her angry, it just made her irrevocably sad.

“How about... my favorite book?”

“You’ve read so many how could you choose,” he said. Nesta huffed a laugh.

She’d read the same book for the past three months because she couldn’t stand to open a new one. There was something about the familiarity that comforted her and the thought of meeting new characters, entering new worlds scared her for reasons she was only beginning to understand. That book had been sitting in the living room every morning. Every night.

Nesta leaned forward, her cheek resting on her palm. The action made her breasts push up in her dress and she noticed the way his eyes lingered on them.

“No?” She asked, somberly, shaking her head. “How about the food I hate. The thing I’m most scared of.  Excited about... Nothing?”

Nesta waved her hand, her voice growing louder, “I mean I know you know how little I eat, how bad I fight, how much weight I’ve lost. You’re very good about reminding me. But do you know... where I even go in the evenings?”

She looked down wrinkling her nose as she huffed a laugh, “You know I get nightmares every night... you must hear them in that room above mine.” She pointed to Azriel. “He does. He asked me about them once. I think I told him some lie or another... but have you ever asked? Have you even asked how I’ve been doing? How I feel? You certainly didn’t ask whether I wanted to train with you but of course that was settled fairly quickly.”  

She took a deep breath, waiting for him to speak but he didn’t. Nesta fiddled with her napkin, unfolding it and then looked to the ceiling. She could see the dust float around the rounded lights.

“You know I hate to do this in front of your friends,” She lifted a hand in their direction, looking to Cassian once more. “I’m sure they have such high opinions of you. Their opinions of me, of course, are already very low. A bitch, I’m assuming is what I’ll be called today. Probably, to make your pride feel a little bit better. A little less wounded... Maybe they’ll believe it themselves too, because well,” Nesta shrugged, “the evidence is already there. It’s the nature of the circumstances I suppose.”

“It’s rather funny I think,” though Nesta didn’t laugh. “You don’t know anything about me. You want to go on a date?”

She lifted her hands up. Innocence personified. “I mean I’m assuming that what’s you meant by us going together to the symphony. We’re clearly not close enough to presume a casual friendly outing and everyone in this room and their mothers know we have some sort of history or they wouldn’t ask about it every time they see me or whisper it when they see us together.”

She smiled, her cheeks straining from the pull. “But for all that history... you know nothing about me. Instead, you have confused your emotions for ‘I’m sure she’s such a good fuck.’ Was it the boobs, the ass? The face maybe? I get that all the time.” Nesta gestured to the room around them, aware that she was making a scene, “Ask anyone of these males who’ve slept with me, I’m sure you’ll find one at any given moment...”

She clasped her hands together, crossing her legs as if she were holding a business meeting. Nesta raised a shoulder. “But at least they didn’t pretend. When they wanted to sleep with me, well... they just said they wanted to sleep with me. Unfortunately, if that’s what you want, you’ll have to buy me a drink first because I’ll have to be much drunker than this.”

Nesta leaned back in her seat. She couldn’t stop fidgeting, like the adrenaline had made her want to fight. She inhaled audibly, a low sound, exhaling lightly.

Cassian looked ashamed.

She tilted her head at that expression, feeling much calmer already.

“Look. As much I hate to admit this, a strict routine has done me some good. Maybe that’s why I can speak these words so truthfully,” Nesta said, her voice casual. “But do not ever think I have forgotten that I am as much a prisoner in my own body that I am in the House of Wind. I have little choice in anything regarding my life, even before this war. But this... I can choose this.”

Nesta refused to look at the rest of them as she lifted a hand to her neck, rubbing the muscle, suddenly tired and achy. “Not only have you bombarded my life in ways I didn’t expect nor ask for, you consistently touch me without my permission, get into my space when I am uncomfortable, push me when I am irritated. Why would I want to go out with you—A male who does not respect me?”

“I hope you didn’t think that me healing or whatever you called it,” She gestured away, “meant we’d be together... Time has already changed, unfortunately. Without us knowing it has slipped us by. Drifted right through our fingers...” She took a breath, staring at the lights on the ceiling. “We’re different people now...”

Nesta looked him straight in the eyes. Willed him to listen to her, really listen. “I won’t wait 500 years for you. I want more.” She shrugged, the light of Cassian’s eyes dimming. “I want better.”

She picked up her things, piling the plates and cup on top of each other. Making sure the napkin was neatly folded. Nesta swallowed, the heaviness setting in. She peered up at Cassian, his hair wild, stray pieces falling out from the leather band. His eyes bright and a hollow amber. “I want you to know that it isn’t because you’re a bastard. I’m sure you’ll think that when you go over this conversation later. But I’m not rejecting you because you’re a bastard... It’s because you’re an asshole.”

Nesta stood up to leave, but Cassian grabbed her hand. She peered down at him. He’d always been taller than her. It seemed odd to see him so small.

“What about me? You don’t know anything about me either.”

Nesta laughed, a small, short sound. “Your favorite color is red.”

Mor’s favorite color, too.

“Your favorite food? Stew, because it reminds you of Illyria. You’re scared of thunder, because it makes you think of your wings being shredded, or at least that’s what you told Azriel when you didn’t think I was paying attention. You like to drink whiskey when something bad happens, but rum when you're celebrating, and you have nightmares too. I suspect they’re probably the same as mine.”

She smiled at him, a melancholic tilt of her lips for those bittersweet memories—for those bittersweet dreams. Cassian looked dejected and she wanted to smooth away the lines with her fingers, but she’d been hurt for far too long from far too many people who’d promised they protect her, so Nesta clenched her fists instead.

“I’m glad we had this chat today.” She looked around the table, grimacing as she tried to smile. The others looked to her as if they were seeing her for the first time. This girl who’d calmy told the commander to go fuck himself. “Please don’t invite me to anymore of these.”

And with that Nesta left, nodding a farewell to Sevenda, coming out with a large tray of food. Two minutes and she was already making her way out the door.  

~

You know these really make me feel better about everything I have to process. But I am so tired, because I can’t sleep waiting for this book. So is this fic good? I don’t know. I can barely read it through.  

But I keep ranting, like everyday. 

So, one rant=one mini fic 

lol so now I have to go write the Nesta sticks up for Cassian fic (which is different than I think you’ll think it is) My work performance is really going to go down this week. But at least this one is uwu status (i.e. fluff--mostly)

Bye.

[robinrequiems]

"Everyone keeps on trying to set us up but we are already secretly dating" clishe as jondami

I know its kinda late but I really love this trope xjkajkajkajka

OO NO. NEVER LATE.

• damian, at 17, has never dated anyone, never danced with anyone at a gala, probably never kissed anyone. his brothers had thought he was aromatic, which was okay!

• until they asked Damian about it:

Damian: ..where would you get that idea? i.. have romantic attractions.

• yeah his brothers were like: WOW! Oh my god! but they have seen how Damian disregards everyone, ignoring everyone and everything

• he only showed feelings to his family, friends, his animals, and jon. jons a separate category, they didn’t know if they were friends/partners/ or enemies sometimes

• but with the way damian smiled with Jon? and how jon hung out with damian? it was perfect!

• kon and kara have both watched as jon declined girls and boys, and basically everyone. he’s been asked out, jons a catch, he’s a sweetheart.. than why isn’t he dating anyone? jons dated people a few years back.. that weird middle school romance with Kathy, and that one week relationship when he was 14, but then everything stopped.

• like jon just no longer tried. they have seen jon laughing at his phone, but they don’t know why. it’s that stupid smile you get when you look at someone you love.

Kon: you aren’t worried about your sons love life?

Clark: ..do you want me to be worried about your love life?

Kon: I’m not— ( oh he thinks of me as his son )

• kon just dropped it, but kara smacked his head because of it.

• but anyways, the batfamily just wanted their little brother to at least go on one date! and the supers didn’t want jon to be alone, jon would be an amazing boyfriend, they knew that

Dick: look, Damian is.. restively calmer with Jon.

Tim: fair, but what if it ruins their friendship they have?

Stephanie: easy answer! we just don’t tell them it’s a date.

• meanwhile, here damian was, laying on jons chest and reading the latest chapter of a manga he just got

Jon: kon and aunt kara have been weird.

Damian: how so?

Jon: dunno, just like.. trying to investigate me. asking me what I like in a person.. it’s weird. it’s like when you tried asking me out

Damian: I didnt try to ask you out! I did!

flashback:

Damian: jonathan- if someone.. what do you.. tolerate in a person?

Jon: what

Damian: what do you like?

Jon: chocolate

Damian: in a person idiot!

Jon: hey don’t insult me): I like people who are.. headstrong, and uhh don’t let people knock them down, but also care for others

Damian: that’s so cliche, i like a cliche idiot who I have no chance with

Jon: what?

Damian: hm?

Jon: what did you say?

Damian: I called you cliche

Jon: okay..

current:

Jon: no you didn’t

Damian: yeah I did!

Jon: you told me you liked me and then pretended like I didn’t hear??

Damian: so

Jon: that wasn’t you asking me out

Damian: I didn’t even ask you out then!

flashback;

Damian: hello.

Jon: hi, you’ve been avoiding me

Damian, throwing a chocolate box at jons head: accept my chocolate

Jon, thankfully, his powers worked and he caught it: whats this for?

Damian: you.

Jon: okay, thanks

Damian, visibly panicking: date. you. me. please ?

Jon: huh-?

Damian: oh god I can’t do this, damnit!

Jon: Damian, breathe

Damian: I can’t, I can’t even ask you out properly!

Jon: oh.. oh.. Damian, Damian, hey, look at me. quit glaring- would you go out with me?

Damian: I was supposed to ask you):

Jon: it was a team effort

present:

Jon: you didn’t ask me out period

Damian: shut up

Jon: but they’re being weird

Damian: mine are too, they asked me if I was aromatic.

Jon: pfft, you’re the biggest romantic out there though!

Damian: i am not!

Jon: with me you are

Damian: no. shut up. but they’re being weird and trying to figure out what’s going on in my life. it’s gross

Jon: pfft

• they sorta just forgot about that. they really shouldn’t have since a month past and they are all celebrating damians birthday ( dunno his birthday, i get mixed results all the time )

• damian is awoken by dick who is forcing him into an outfit. he wanted to sleep all day. he’s uoset

Dick: hey birthday boy, happy 18th, you’re an adult now!

Damian: barely, all I can really do is legally move out.

Dick: hey, hey, don’t be a downer. cmon, everyone is here

Damian: everyone? please say you didn’t throw a party

Dick: I would be a liar then, sorry, lil d, but today’s a big day, okay? I know you hate parties, but you deserve one.

Damian: tt

• and low and behold, the only one down stairs is only jon kent.. damians so confused. and he’s holding flowers. and looking like he wants to sink into the floor. oh Jesus fuckingchrist

Damian: richard-??

Dick: surprise, I’m a liar. you two, are just going to go out for a nice lunch- have fun, if anything happens, call me.

Jon: hey, d…

Damian: um.

• dick just walks away, not before kissing damians head and wishing him another happy birthday.

• even though dick would actually like to spend the day with him, he also just wants to see if Damian and jon could work, but if it doesn’t, that’s okay. all he wants is his brother to be happy. dick does end up nearly having a breakdown in the bathroom though, his Robin had grown up so much, Damian was.. a petulant child when he first got there, and now? he’s a nearly functioning adult. he’s really proud of him okat?

• and dick is having: oh shit I’m old moments. but dicks so happy with the way damian freely smiled when he saw jon, even if he was confused. the Damian from even 5 years ago wouldn’t have done that. ( sorry dick and dami family stuff snuck in )

Damian: ..why the flowers?

Jon: dick gave them to me.. said to give them to you. they knew your favorites..

Damian: huh.. oh. oh no

Jon: huh?

Damian: this is a date

Jon: it is? oh no, I would’ve dress up more-

Damian: no, it was made by.. that. oh

Damian: they set us up

Jon: for what?

Damian: a date, idiot!

Jon: oh..

Damian: damnit.

• they hid their relatiosnsho because it was easier to go out in public, they didn’t want the superhero community to keep them apart during life threatening missions either. ( during life threatening missions, a lot of couples were split up since there would be a conflict of interest and it would cause many risks if someone was constantly worrying over their loved one, you know? granted, some couples are fine, but Damian knew bruce, he knew they would be separated. Bruce also knows damij would give his life for his loved ones. Heretic was an example of that, so he definitely would, Damian knows that he has a point, but he doesn’t want jon to be alone during life threatening stuff )

• and Damian didn’t want to deal with the fact his brothers might feel a little betrayed by the fact he hid for.. 3 years now. oh yeah, they started dating at 15. Damian.. loved his family, but sometimes? they were.. overwhelming. jon was just an escape sometimes, and he didn’t want his family to know that he escapes from his family

Jon: you know.. this wouldn’t happen if we just..

Damian: shut up.

• but dami & jon went out though, they went out for lunch and had a nice time.. minus the paparazzi Damian wanted to murder.

Damian: this is why I don’t want to make us public.

Jon: will we ever be public? it’s now or never, d, i don’t wanna hide us forever.

Damian:

Damian:okay. fuck it.

• and then they kiss. break the internet temporarily. and have to find a way to tell their family.

• thays. gonna be so fun.

[suginami-division]

Maki’s Thoughts on Aoyama Division

Tomi Chōten

“I’m not one who gets along with people who consider themselves to be in the upper class. I’ve done a lot to really rouse the ire of those people, mostly in the education and political field. The topic of using their money for something that doesn’t directly benefit themselves seems to spark a rage within them. Not that I really care about how they feel about it, I simply wish for them to use their money for good rather than their own greedy wants.”

“However, this Chōten-san seems to live blissfully aware of the world around him, surrounded only by the material objects he takes for granted. So really, I don’t think I could or would ever cross paths with him. I think for both of our sakes it would be best too, if our favorite pastimes is starting arguments between others. His mother is someone of interest to me however, but that’s more of a personal and political interest of mine.”

Karada Kessaku

“For a person to dedicate their time to improving their own bodies and helping others strengthen their bodies is admirable for sure. With age, your physical health becomes something important yet oh so difficult to maintain. I know that I could probably use more exercise, but I prefer to use my free time with books and shogi.”

“Needless to say, Kessaku-san has an obvious bias for training subjects which seems… A bit unsavory for a business. Exclusively training women and charging exorbitant amounts of money for a short time? If that doesn’t sound like a form of scamming, I’m not sure what is.”

Luis Kōkyū

“Of the three, this man looks to be the most pleasant of the group. His business seems honest and having a love for your family and friends are wonderful qualities in a person. I’m not sure why he tries to front such a horrible personality in front of others, but I’m not the person to question it.”

“I think this is the first person to tower over me though. As strange as it might be for Kōkyū-san to read this, his height is my top reason to meet him… I’ve never had to look up to another person when standing, so I’m curious to know what most other people feel like when talking to me for once. It should be interesting to experience that, I think.”

Jet Set Trio

“A team of narcissists sounds like a nightmare for Ryuko. He has never been the kind of person to tolerate people who are unabashedly proud and confident in themselves. And… I’m somewhat the same. It’s hard for me to understand how someone could be so confident in themselves, but that’s just my lack in self-confidence.”

“But for a team to be supported solely by their egos should make for an easy opponent. One hit to their weakness and their confidence should fly right out the window. So really, I don’t have any worries about this team. Unlike how I may think about myself, I’m confident our team can topple these nobles down.”

[ofpineapplesanddawns]

Hey John! There‘s been an idea on my mind and, if you‘re up for fics right now, I would be super grateful if you could write it. Maybe Thorne is there as a guest on Campbell‘s radio show and they get in the way of chatting about music and become friends (or even more, maybe?). Thank you in advance ♥️

Oooh, that's an interesting combo, I don't believe I've ever seen it before.

This is after Campbell gets his own show, so, like, post-canon stuff.

On with the fic!

--

"This is Campbell Bain, the bane of your life, bringing you all the latest and classic hits of this time and before! Today we've got a very special guess on the show that I'm sure some of you are just dyin' to listen to! His silky voice comin' at you live through your speakers and headphones, probably much more tolerable than mine!"

Campbell grinned, glancing over at the man in the booth with him. "I'll introduce this mystery guest to you after I play my pick for today's 'First Up Oldie', hope you're in the mood for a little Johnny Mathis!"

He set the needle on the record and the song began to play before he turned to his guest.

The man was slightly older than Campbell, dressed in what was considered punk style, much different from Campbell's own choice of... well.... he wasn't sure what his style was called.

His eyes were painted in eyeliner, he wore all sorts of jewelry, and he was smirking in a way that Campbell could register as implying a number of things. "You think a bunch of people who listen to ya for oldies is gonna wanna hear an interview from an up-and-comin' punk artist?"

"Hey, hey, I play modern stuff too." Campbell replied, waving a finger. "I like the old stuff, reminds me of my first DJ job. 'n fact, it's an homage to it!"

"Right, the St. Jude's hour you do on Fridays?" Thorne asked, leaning back in his seat.

Campbell blinked, surprised by that. "You listen to my show?"

"Course I do! 's why I specifically requested you to interview me!" Thorne replied as he put his arms behind his head, smirking at Campbell still. "I like your style, kid, it's a whole... hodge podge of whatever, and you clearly don't give two shits. Respect."

Campbell's grin was wider now before he suddenly turned back to the controls before him as the song started to end. "And that was Wonderful, Wonderful by Johnny Mathis, a true classic! Now, onto the interview with someone who I certainly hope will become a class in his own right far into the future! Do ya wanna introduce yourself to our listeners?"

"Oh, I suppose." Thorne chuckled, sitting up, leaning towards the mic before him. "Hello out there, radio listeners. Name's Thorne Jamison, and I'm gonna be the biggest name in punk since the 1970s, just you wait."

--

"I think that went well." Thorne said, removing the headphones from his head, handing them over to the host. "Do you think people liked it?"

"Well, considering those calls we got, I'd say they did." Campbell replied, smiling. He sure was a chipper guy, always smiling and grinning, Thorne noted. It was kinda cute.

"And you're gonna play my music on your show?"

"Of course I am! Gotta get it known, yeah? And what better way than through the show hosted by the loony! You'd be surprised by how often I get letters and calls from people who like gettin' their music selections from someone like me."

"Nice, nice." Thorne nodded, standing up from his seat, holding out a hand. Campbell looked at it, then took it. "Lovely meetin' you, Bain. We should meet up again sometime, my treat."

Campbell blinked a few times. "Oh, uh, ya wanna do that?"

"'Course, I like you, kid. Wouldn't mind gettin' to know you more, yeah?"

"Uh, sure! Yeah, we can do that!" Campbell replied, shaking his hand before pulling back, his grin in place once more.

"Well then, here's my card." Thorne pulled it from his wallet, then headed for the door, but not before holding his hand up to his face, thumb and pinky sticking out, mouthing 'call me' with a wink. And with that, he was out the door.

[jlalafics]

"The Long Weekend"-Part One

Happy belated birthday @keelaree!

Hope you enjoy this first part. Thank you for being such a wonderful part of my writing life, and an even better friend. Can't wait till we can reunite in SF, so we can tea time together and eat soup dumplings.

Love you!

Summary: Two assistants who barely tolerate each other. One snowy cabin. One very long weekend.

Oh, and one bed.

-----

“I’m making the turn now, Haymitch,” Peeta told his boss as he navigated the icy road. “Should have everything prepped and ready by the time you and Effie arrive.”

“Thanks,” Haymitch replied over the speakerphone. “I should tell you that I did ask for someone to help you out. Someone who knows Effie better than I do sometimes—”

Peeta slowed his car as he spotted the cozy cabin in front of him. However, he grimaced seeing the red Jeep already parked on its side.

“You didn’t.”

“Peeta, Katniss knows Effie very well,” his boss said calmly. “Just like you know me. I know that you two don’t get along—”

“Understatement of the year,” Peeta replied as he parked roughly.

“This is important. I’m proposing to Effie and I want it to be perfect,” Haymitch explained. “Katniss knows all the foods she likes to eat, and how to decorate the place to make it comfortable yet romantic. Effie and I are finishing up our meeting with Mr. Snow then we’ll be making our way up to the cabin for the holiday weekend. I’ll call you when we’re on our way so you and Katniss can take off—that is if you haven’t murdered one another by then.”

“I’m only doing this because I’m your assistant,” he called out.

“You could at least like me!” Haymitch joked. “I pay you an obscene amount for an assistant.”

“Katniss probably gets paid more.”

“Well, she picks up tampons for Effie without being asked so probably.”

“Everything will be ready by the time you get here,” Peeta promised. “And I’m doing this because I like and respect you.”

“Thank you, Peeta. Call you soon.”

++++++

Peeta Mellark sighed as he stepped out of his car, bags in hand. The snowy wind picked up and he wrapped his parka tighter around himself before rushing up to the porch. It was getting worse up here, and he hoped that the soon-to-be engaged couple would make it safely.

Getting out the key that Haymitch lent him, Peeta unlocked the door and quickly stepped in to keep the cold air from entering with him.

“Oh, you’re finally here.” Katniss Everdeen sailed into the room, placing a charcuterie board on the coffee table in the center of the sitting room. “I thought you died or something.”

Peeta gave her a wry smile, placing the bags on the floor before shaking off his parka and hanging it on the hook by the door.

“Thought or hoped?” He searched his bag before pulling out the champagne that Haymitch asked along with the two glasses. Going to the table, Peeta placed them on the table before going back to the bag for the champagne bucket. “Is there ice?”

“The fridge has an ice machine,” Katniss informed him tersely, nodding her head towards the left. “I’ve already gotten their dinner started.”

“Not surprised.” Peeta walked into the kitchen, heading to the stainless-steel fridge. “You’re so anal that you’ve probably carved those little radish flowers for garnish.”

“They’re in the fridge so they’ll be fresh.”

Peeta wasn’t sure why they didn’t get along.

For one, Katniss was admittedly attractive with her long dark, and almond-shaped grey eyes. The first time he saw his stomach had definitely done a little flip. She had been walking alongside Effie, notebook in hand, wearing a fitted black dress with a peter pan collar and paying scant attention to anything else around her.

She literally knocked him to the ground.

Katniss had apologized, holding out her hand to help him up.

And Peeta had fucking tingled at her touch.

Over the next few days as he learned the ropes of being Haymitch Abernathy’s assistant, Peeta noticed her across the hall. Effie Trinket’s office was directly adjacent to his boss’ and Katniss’ desk was in the same spot as his.

She kept her head down, never acknowledging him, so wrapped up in her work or answering her phone.

So, Peeta asked around.

“She’s an ice queen,” Cato, who was in Marketing, informed him. “Never wants to hang out with anyone or even join in during happy hour. It’s important here to form relationships with everyone. Panem Industries is all about workplace harmony and Katniss embodies none of that.”

“Yeah, she’s snooty, too,” Clove from IT added. “I once asked her something about her family and she replied that it was none of my business. Like I was just trying to get to know her!”

“Wow. I guess if Katniss is that much of a head case, then I shouldn’t bother to ask her for help,” he told the two.

After that, during any interaction, she treated him indifferently…cold even. Peeta couldn’t help but be disappointed that Cato and Clove’s words were true.

And that was the end of his fascination with Katniss Everdeen.

“You want to get out here and help me or was the ice machine too hard for you to maneuver?” Katniss suddenly called out.

Peeta quickly filled the bucket and stepped out.

Katniss was bent over the couch, arranging the pillows, and he felt a heat rush through his skin.

There was also the slight twinge in his crotch at seeing a firm apple-bottom in tight ski pants.

It seemed that Katniss Everdeen had a bigger effect on him than he realized.

++++++

Peeta Mellark had a huge effect on her.

Katniss struggled to keep the heat off her cheeks as she fixed the pillows that she bought for the cabin. Effie loved those cheesy sayings, so she went on Etsy and ordered custom-made pillows with her favorite quotes.

No one should spend so much time arranging pillows, but Katniss could feel his stare on her. It made her nervous…and tingly.

However, these feelings didn’t belong—especially in a work situation and she needed this job.

Taking a breath, Katniss turned…to find Peeta right behind her.

He jumped back, startled by her abrupt movements.

Whoa—was he checking her out?

“Why were you so close?” she blurted out.

“Sorry. It looked like you were confused about how pillows worked,” he replied, rolling his eyes. “You were there for a millennium.”

“Funny.” She sighed at the amusement in his gorgeous blue eyes—stop it!—and steeled her expression. “Do you think you could help me set up this romantic dinner for our bosses instead of standing there like an ass-licker?”

“You mean asshole.”

“I stand by my words,” Katniss replied and was surprised when he chuckled, his eyes crinkling as he did. She couldn’t help but let her mouth rise. “The table is in that closet next to the door. I got some table linens from a vintage shop that Effie likes last week.”

“Wow, you’re really on top of it,” Peeta remarked, going to the closet. “How do you have time for a life?”

She didn’t.

As in, Katniss didn’t have a life.

She had work, she had a home, but a social life was non-existent. Katniss knew what everyone said about her; that she was cold and distant, never wanting to be part of the team. It never bothered her because she did have her reasons.

So, she was surprised at how hurt she was when she heard Peeta call her a headcase.

Katniss hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, only passing the breakroom to get to the copy machine. However, she stopped at the mention of her name.

Cato’s words were no surprise, though he failed to mention that her iciness was due to him inappropriately putting his arm around her and telling her that they should get to know each other on a personal level. Katniss also didn’t trust Clove for shit; she was the office gossip.

It hit hard to know that the one person who had made her tingle was so easily influenced by two douchebags.

Katniss had decided, then and there, that if Peeta didn’t see past her exterior, then he must be like the rest of them.

“I’m very organized,” she replied. It came out harder than she intended. “I have to be.”

Peeta had already set up the table in front of the fireplace.

“Well, it’s in your favor,” he told her. “You’re a good assistant.”

Katniss looked up in surprise. “You think I’m a good assistant?”

Peeta snorted. “Like you didn’t know it—where are the tablecloths?”

She handed him a beautiful fuchsia tablecloth followed by a cream lace one.

“Fuchsia first then layer it with the lace,” she told him. “I always hope I am. Effie is a great boss and she’s so supportive about work-and-homelife balance. I want to make sure this is all perfect for her.”

Katniss helped Peeta straighten the cloth, smoothing it down and making sure that there were no wrinkles. They settled into a light conversation about working with their respective bosses while setting the rest of the table. While Peeta worked on the place settings, he told her about how he admired Haymitch’s down-to-earth attitude despite being one of the most successful people in the company.

She arranged the florals in the center of the table while telling him how she had worked two jobs prior to getting this one.

“I was a waitress and housekeeper before this,” she revealed. “I was working a crazy lunch rush when I met Effie. We got to talking because she noticed how I met her coffee exactly the way she liked it despite my ragged expression—her words not mine. Effie kept on coming in, and a month after we met, she offered me the assistant job. Said she like my gumption.”

“That’s really cool,” Peeta said. He set down one of the forks he was cleaning and met her eyes. “You know, this is the first time we’ve really talked. I kind of believed you thought of me as your enemy.”

“I thought the same thing.” Katniss placed a folded napkin on the plate in front of her. “You called me a head case.”

His blue eyes widened, shocked at her words. Slowly, she could see in his eyes, the memory of his words.

“I didn’t know you heard that,” he said quietly. “I didn’t mean it and I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine!” Katniss stood up abruptly. The pain of his words churned in her stomach. “I know that everyone talks about me. In my defense, Cato was completely inappropriate when we first met. I thought acting like a bitch would stave him off. Clove has no filter—”

Peeta’s brows furrowed at her sudden coldness.

“I realize that now—one year later…is that why you completely ignore me? Why you act like the sight of me makes you sick?”

“I do not!” Katniss cried out into the room. “You avoid me at all costs!”

“Because the one time that I attempted to ask you a question—you brushed me aside!” he shouted. “If you had bothered to talk to me, I wouldn’t have believed what people said in the first place—” Peeta’s phone rang, and he quickly picked up, seeing his boss’ face on his screen. “Haymitch? You on your way? What? No, I haven’t looked outside—”

Katniss rushed to one of the front windows, pulling back the curtain.

White everywhere.

She couldn’t even see her car and it was bright fucking red!

“They’re not coming.”

Turning, Katniss found Peeta putting his phone in his pocket as he approached.

“The snowstorm came unexpectedly, and the roads are blocked. They’re staying at Effie’s to wait it out while we…are stuck here until it passes.”

++++++

The good thing was that the house was fully equipped. Food was stocked in the fridge since the couple had planned to stay for the long weekend. Both he and Katniss had even brought Haymitch and Effie’s luggage so there had clothing.

“Well, dinner must be ready,” Katniss informed him with a sigh. “If you want to get more comfortable, you can probably change to something of Haymitch’s. I have a call to make before my phone dies and then I’ll pull the food out of the oven.”

Peeta nodded numbly, grabbing Haymitch's duffle and going to the opposite open door where the bedroom was. He tossed the bag on the bed—

The one bed.

Turning, he rushed out of the room to look for his female counterpart. “Katniss!” He found the sitting room empty and headed into the kitchen.

“Yes, I’ll be fine,” she spoke quietly into the phone. “Just be nice to Johanna, okay? I’ll be home soon.” Her voice sounded completely different, light and happy—even affectionate. “I love you, too. Good night.”

He knocked on the archway and she turned to him.

“We have a problem,” he told her. “There’s only one bed.”

“And the couch is really just a loveseat,” Katniss mused as she pulled the food—steak with roasted asparagus and potatoes. Her expression was pained, and she blew out a breath. “I don’t really want to think about this right now. Why don’t we just eat?”

Peeta quickly nodded in agreement, rushing to the sitting room, and grabbing their plates.

“Why don’t you let me set this up?” he told her, seeing how frazzled she seemed. “Have a seat. Open the champagne—”

Katniss laughed and the sound of her lightened the load on his chest.

“You trying to get me drunk, Mellark?”

Peeta smirked. “If it makes you like me, then yes.”

“Fine, fine…” Katniss sauntered off towards the doorway. She stopped at the archway and their eyes met. Her gaze was nervous, but he could see the warmth in her greys. “You’re not my enemy, Peeta. And…I like you more than you think.”

Katniss disappeared, but not before he spied the blush on her cheeks.

Peeta felt another twinge. This time—in his chest.

++++++

Instead of sitting at the table, Katniss grabbed Effie’s luggage, a classic Louis Vuitton that cost more than her old Jeep, and brought it to the bedroom.

The one bedroom. With the one bed.

A sudden image of herself spooned contentedly against Peeta in that very bed rose in her mind—

“Stop tripping off him!” she chided herself.

Distractedly, Katniss opened the bag, sorting for something remotely comfortable in her boss’ luggage. However, it looked like Effie was expecting some sort of kinky weekend. The only sleepwear she had was a tiny red number that Katniss would probably bust out of; Effie was a tiny but fierce woman.

Maybe she could borrow something from Haymitch’s pile—

“Katniss?”

“I’m coming!” she called out before stuffing Effie’s lingerie back into the back.

Walking back into the room, Katniss saw that Peeta had already placed the plates on the table. He stood waiting for her, looking obnoxiously handsome as he had the day they met.

That first time, she had knocked him to the ground so caught up in following with Effie’s rapid pace. When Katniss held out her hand to him, she was caught up in the open smile he gave her. Then it was the gold waves along his forehead, which Katniss desperately wanted to brush back and the blue of his eyes—they had a tinge of grey in them.

For a moment, she was just a girl, and he was just a boy. Peeta didn’t know anything about the rumors of her iciness or how someone like her, with no college degree, managed to get a position like hers.

In that moment, Katniss was pure.

“You alright?” Peeta asked, interrupting her moment down memory lane.

“Yes.” She let him help her into her seat. “I was just thinking about something.”

“Was it the one bed thing?” he joked. “I’m fine with sleeping on the floor—”

Katniss held her hand up. “Let’s be grownups. It’s a big bed and we can put a pillow between us.”

“Very to the point,” Peeta replied, holding up his champagne glass. “To being grown-ups.”

“To being grown-ups.” She clinked her glass to his and took a full gulp. The liquid bubbled through her, making her laugh. “Wow, that’s some good shit.”

Peeta guffawed. “We’re going to have some fun.”

END OF PART ONE

[sophiashortcake]

Kenma, tsukki and suga on white day 🥺

𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬

includes kenma kozume, tsukishima kei, & sugawara kōshi

*·˚ ༘♡ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: kenma kozume x reader, tsukishima kei x reader, sugawara kōshi x reader, (gender neutral!)

*·˚ ༘♡ 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: for anybody unaware of what white day is, it’s a holiday celebrated throughout asia where you give chocolates to people you love similar to valentine’s day :)

*·˚ ༘♡ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cursing, a little longer than intended

*·˚ ༘♡ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff

— 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐀 𝐊𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈

𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑: white chocolate + cookies n creme!

white day was the perfect way to confess to sugawara.

except one problem presented itself.

you had no idea what sugawara’s favorite chocolate was.

daichi had no clue either, neither did asahi or kiyoko.

and asking now would have been too suspicious.

what the hell could you do?

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

“asahi, are you even sure this is his favorite chocolate? i swear i saw him eating milk chocolate last week.” daichi groaned.

“i asked him myself!”

“but are you positive?” you questioned.

“i’m sure any chocolates you give him will be fine,” kiyoko sighed, “sugawara would appreciate anything you gave him.”

daichi and asahi echoed off of kiyoko, but you still held your doubts. you had liked sugawara for three years now, and now that you were nearing the end of high school, you finally wanted to confess to him. you wanted it to be perfect, to say the least. who could blame you? you wanted the three year build up to be for something!

“what are you guys still doing up here?”

the three of you snapped your heads up to sugawara standing in the doorway of the clubroom. you all scrambled up from the small table you were chatting at to face him.

“just talking about practice tomorrow!” asahi stammered. he was a terrible liar.

“yes, it’s important!” daichi chirped after asahi. you almost smacked your forehead. great, so was daichi.

“without me?” sugawara asked, raising an eyebrow.

“we thought you had already gone home for the day,” you replied, feigning innocence.

“sugawara, do you have any plans for white day tomorrow?” kiyoko asked casually.

“not anything in particular,” he shrugged, “what about you guys?”

“nothing!” you, daichi, and asahi exclaimed simultaneously. oh god, you three couldn’t make this any worse, could you?

“i was hoping to get some chocolates from my friends,” kiyoko replied, “dark chocolate is my favorite, what about you?”

kiyoko was a fucking genius.

“hmmm,” sugawara hummed in thought, “probably white chocolate with cookies n creme filling?”

“that’s a good choice,” kiyoko remarked, flashing you a quick grin that sugawara thankfully didn’t pick up on.

“how about you guys?” sugawara asked, looking around.

“milk chocolate!” asahi stated a little too quickly.

“mine too,” daichi replied. you could tell he was sweating.

“ah, me three,” you answered, scratching the back of your head, hoping kiyoko’s ulterior motive wasn’t so transparent.

“come on guys! we should lock up now,” daichi stated, quick to change the subject.

as you all grabbed your bags and headed out the club room, you leaned over to kiyoko and whispered a soft, “thank you.”

on your way home, you quickly dropped into the grocery store to buy the supplies needed to make the chocolates. you spent the night carefully making and decorating the chocolates before putting them into the small box for sugawara. you went to bed hoping that he reciprocated your feelings, before you knew it, white day had come.

you sat on the steps of the volleyball gym, waiting for sugawara to come by to unlock the doors. daichi had purposefully made sure sugawara was the first one there to meet you with your chocolates.

what if he didn’t feel the same? what if he thought your chocolates taste bad? what if he was allergic and you sent him into an allergic reaction—

“y/n?”

“suga!” you exclaimed, jumping to your feet. “good morning!”

“good morning,” he chuckled, “what are you doing out here?”

you inhaled, three years. it has taken you three years to do this. it’s now or never.

“i made these for you for white day. i like you sugawara!” you presented the box to him, as sugawara stared at you wide-eyed.

then he started laughing.

oh great, your crush is laughing at your confession. you were preparing for a rejection but you weren’t prepared for-

“happy white day, y/n, i made these for you,” he smiled, holding out a small bag of chocolates for you. milk chocolates. “i like you too.”

your jaw dropped open, holy shit.

“to be honest,” sugawara continued, “i didn’t know your favorite chocolates, so i had to make kiyoko, daichi, and asahi figure out for me when you guys were talking in the club room last night.”

“wait… so did i…”

“they two-timed us!” sugawara gasped.

“hey guys!” daichi called from behind you, alongside kiyoko and asahi.

you looked to the three third-years grinning mischievously, and backed to sugawara. you both locked eyes and cackled. you both had been played by your best friends.

you pressed a kiss to sugawara’s cheek, “happy white day, koushi.”

— 𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐀 𝐊𝐄𝐈

𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑: chocolate strawberries!

oh, you’re bold for this one.

to even have a crush on tsukishima kei is an act of bravery.

but to make him chocolates on white day? you might as well be setting yourself up for rejection.

but luck is on your side because it just so happens tsukishima tolerates (read: likes) you too.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

“m-maybe i should just leave them in his locker,” you stammered, “or better yet, just eat these myself and try again next year.”

“i’m positive that he’ll love them,” yamaguchi replied, offering a smile and a rub on your shoulder for support.

yamaguchi had never told you, but he had a running theory. while he was more than aware of your crush on the middle blocker, a secret he had to swear never to tell, he had a theory that the same said middle blocker had his own crush on you in return.

tsukishima never confirmed it himself, but he saw the way he glanced at you while you weren’t looking, or the way he spoke a little softer while tutoring you. and not to mention, tsukishima was far more patient with you than yamaguchi had ever seen him with anybody else, not even him. it didn’t take a genius to see that tsukishima was seemingly smitten with you.

“there he is!” yamaguchi gasped, directing your attention to the tall boy making his way over the courtyard to you both. “now or never!”

while you were distracted by tsukishima, yamaguchi took this as his chance to scamper away to leave you two alone.

“wait, wait! yamaguchi!” you hissed after the freckled boy, but it was too late because as he retreated, tsukishima was coming closer and closer. you made a mental note to strangle yamaguchi later if you didn’t die of embarrassment today.

“what was that?” tsukishima questioned as he approached you, eyeing yamaguchi who was now across the courtyard with hinata and kageyama.

“no clue!” you chirped. way to be subtle.

tsukishima looked at you, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. his gaze dropped to your hands, which were behind your back, obviously clutching something.

“what are you hiding behind your back?”

shit.

“nothing.”

way to be fucking obvious, you scolded yoursef.

“you’re lying,” tsukishima said, rolling his eyes, “let me see.”

there was no way to avoid this, was there?

“fine, but don’t get snarky with me,” you warned. tsukishima raised his hands in mock surrender.

you presented him the pink cellophane bag harboring your carefully crafted chocolate strawberries. it was tied neatly with a pink ribbon, that now upon inspection, looked incredibly cheesy.

“i made you chocolates,” you muttered, shoving them into his hands. “happy white day.”

tsukishima was oddly quiet as he looked at the bag in his hands. it was almost comedic how the dainty and cutesy bag differed from his large hands, callosed and bandaged still from volleyball practice the other day. but you couldn’t pay much attention to the bag in his hands as your heart was threatening to beat out of your chest.

the silence was almost deafening, maybe a rejection would have been easier. it certainly would have been quicker. you could swear that his silence may have been hell on earth.

“thank you.”

wait, what?

“you like them?!” you exclaimed, you were sure he would’ve given them back, probably with a backhanded comment as well.

“why wouldn’t i?” he stated plainly as he busied himself with opening up the small bag, “i like strawberries, i like you.”

“what?!”

in the distance, you swore you could hear yamaguchi giggling to himself.

— 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀 𝐊𝐎𝐙𝐔𝐌𝐄

𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑: milk chocolate + caramel!

it was hard planning a confession to someone as quiet as kenma.

that’s why you enlisted kuroo to help you find the perfect way to confess to kenma.

thankfully, white day was approaching, which gave you the perfect opportunity to confess to the setter.

with your help from kuroo, you found kenma after practice to give him your gift.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

“oi! kenma! there’s somebody waiting outside for you,” kuroo called across the gym. he had to restrain himself from giving kenma a coy smirk, knowing exactly who it was outside.

“who is it?” kenma replied, looking up from the cart he was disposing of volleyballs in.

“i would go see for yourself.”

the setter sighed, knowing full well that kuroo’s quipped eyebrow and smirk he was trying to suppress was alluding to something sneaky he had up his sleeve. atleast he got to take a break from practice.

in actuality, kenma had the right idea, kuroo was indeed up to something. unknown to him, you and kuroo had been scheming the perfect way to confess your feelings to kenma. kuroo had proposed the idea of white day, even going as far as finding out his favorite chocolates. you had no other ideas, so it wouldn’t hurt to try, right?

as kenma stepped out of the gym he found you holding a small box nervously as you stared at your shoes, seemingly being the one in question looking for him.

“y/n? what are you doing out here?” kenma frowned, “you’re gonna catch a cold.”

“i’m actually here to see you,” you stated, your cheeks burning. you couldn’t tell if it was from the unusually cold march day, or the fact you were finally confessing to your longtime crush.

before kenma could question any further, you were holding out the small box of chocolates to kenma.

“happy white day! i like you, so i made these for you,” you stated, a sudden rush of boldness flaring in your chest.

“you- you like me?” kenma asked flabbergasted, to say the least. his cheeks were bright red, and he could barely stammer out the words.

“no, i give white day chocolates to all my friends, just ask kuroo,” you deadpanned.

“wait-“

“i’m kidding,” you grinned.

kenma let out a heavy sigh as he took the box from your hands. he cracked open the box to find it filled with milk chocolates in heart molds. ah, so that was why kuroo asked for his favorite chocolates randomly last month.

he looked up to find you fiddling with your sweater sleeve as you waited for his reaction. unexpectedly, he wrapped his arms around you, pulling your head into the crook of his shoulder.

“don’t scare me like that, i was actually afraid you liked the rooster-head,” kenma muttered.

“does this mean you like the chocolates?” you grinned as you pulled your face up to meet his.

“not as much as i like you.”

🏷 (open!) : @stcrryskies @iwaizoom @tsukisemi

© 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐜𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭. ੈ♡˳·˖✶

[ibijau]

Futures Past pt18 / on AO3

Nie Huaisang returns to the Cloud Recesses, and meets the people he's meant to befriend

Much to his surprise, Nie Huaisang realised upon returning to the Cloud Recesses that he had missed the place. Or rather, he had missed the friends who lived there.

All winter, Su She and him had exchanged letters, mostly to complain about every single thing that bothered them. When they finally met again in person, they were quite happy to do more of the same. They also discussed all the things they might do for fun that year. 

Su She, at long last, had risen in rank and been given more freedom than he used to have. He would have less classes to attend since he was now trusted to take charge of his own training to some degree, he would join more Night Hunts, he had been given a new jade token that allowed him to leave the Cloud Recesses at any time of the day as long as curfew was respected, and he would even be included among those juniors who patrolled to enforce the respect of the rules.

All this made Nie Huaisang so happy for his friend, that he did not realise at first all the implications this had regarding the amount of time they would get to spend together. Su She would be very busy in the future, but he promised he would do everything possible to still make time for his best friend, and Nie Huaisang easily believed him.

The other joy to be found in returning to the Cloud Recesses was not immediate. By the time Nie Huaisang had arrived there, Lan Xichen had not yet returned from a Night Hunt he’d gone on with Nie Mingjue. That was hardly a surprise. These two were usually far too serious in all things, but when they went Night Hunting together, they always stayed a little longer than really necessary. Nie Huaisang usually found that greatly amusing, and never missed a chance to tease his brother about skirting his duties. They seemed to have taken a particularly long time on this occasion, but since Nie Mingjue had complained a few times that he hadn't seen his friend in such a long while, it was not so odd. Nie Huaisang would have mocked his brother so much if he'd seen him before leaving home. 

Since he didn’t have a chance to do it that time, he instead teased Lan Xichen when he finally came home, on the same day most of the guest disciples were set to arrive, on the eve of the lectures' start. Of course if Nie Huaisang had been a good and dutiful person, he would have gone to the main gate to see those other guest disciples, and maybe try to strike a friendship with them as early as possible. But between trying to catch a glimpse of the boring friends his future self wanted him to make, and dropping by Lan Xichen’s house to see the friend he actually liked, the choice had been easily made.

Lan Xichen offered him tea and smiled when accused of dodging his responsibilities, but less warmly than Nie Huaisang had expected. In fact, he found that the older boy looked rather more tired than he should have been, and more nervous as well. He tried to ask about that, but Lan Xichen refused to dwell on the subject.

“There is just a lot to do, and you are right that I was gone longer than I should have,” Lan Xichen said. “Especially since Wangji is in seclusion… he was supposed to come out of it today, but I saw him earlier and convinced him to continue meditating alone for at least another month. There will be many energetic people among our guests this year, and I doubt he will enjoy their company too much.”

Nie Huaisang, who had found the Cloud Recesses even more fun without the constant threat of Lan Wangji being around to enforce the rule, could only nod. He didn't mind waiting a month to set in movement his older self's orders.

“And this had nothing at all with you wishing to have a little peace without your brother constantly enforcing the rules, does it?” he teased.

“I am nowhere near as rebellious as you seem to have decided,” Lan Xichen replied with an indulgent smile. “Though I suppose Lan Wangji does take a stricter approach to them than I do. I’m sure in time, he’ll learn that they are meant to be a guidance, not a restriction.”

“And that he should let his brother eat candies sometimes.”

Lan Xichen smiled, trying to hide a chuckle. That was enough to comfort Nie Huaisang. As long as he still enjoyed his jokes, Lan Xichen could not be doing badly. And after that the conversation soon moved on to music, giving Nie Huaisang a great chance to show off how hard he had worked all winter. By the time Nie Huaisang had to leave, Lan Xichen appeared in good spirits again, for which he congratulated himself.

-

When morning came, Nie Huaisang got up as early as he could manage after falling back on his old habits during winter, and headed toward the lecture hall with the other Nie disciples. There were a number of other boys assembled at the door, all waiting for the teacher to arrive. 

Among those, the ones dressed in purple attracted Nie Huaisang’s attention the most. He recognised Jiang Cheng of course, with Meng Yao next to him whose attitude seemed more that of a babysitter than a fellow disciple, perhaps because of that other boy standing near them who had a mischievous smile on his lips. Then, behind them, there were two other boys dressed in Jiang purple, plain and quite forgettable. Perhaps Wei Wuxian wasn’t there after all, or perhaps he had already entered the class to study on his own, as befitted someone who was destined to fall for Lan Wangji.

Even if that person was absent, Nie Huaisang decided he should go greet Jiang Cheng and Meng Yao at least, since he already knew them. But before he had taken even one step in their direction, he heard someone call out for him.

“You are Nie gongzi, right?” a haughty boy asked.

He was dressed in that shade of yellow that only the Jins ever thought pleasant, and his face bore a passing resemblance with Jin Zixun’s, except with much nicer features, and a far colder expression. All of this made it rather easy to guess his identity, even if they had never met.

“And you must be Jin gongzi,” Nie Huaisang replied with a polite nod. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“The pleasure is mine,” Jin Zixuan said, returning the nod. “Since you are my cousin’s friend, I hope we can become better acquainted.”

Nie Huaisang gaped at the other boy.

“I’m what?”

“He’s too proud to use the word, but I know Zixun. He wrote about you several times last year, and he told me you helped him pass his exams.”

That this would be anywhere near enough to be considered a friend said a lot about Jin Zixun’s overall popularity. Nie Huaisang himself, who wasn’t exactly rich in friends, wouldn’t have used the word to talk about Jin Zixun, but he still felt flattered. In fact, he wondered if the acquaintance might be worth sustaining. Surely Nie Huaisang could try to write to Jin Zixun perhaps? He’d promised he would write to Xue Yang already, to give him a chance to practice reading and writing without the pressure of a classroom. If he was writing anyway, one more letter could be easy to fit into his very full schedule. Jin Zixun was a prick, but on occasions he'd been almost tolerable, so he wouldn't be the worst friend Nie Huaisang could make.

“He also said you became friends because he broke your nose,” Jin Zixuan added, his tone dripping judgement at the idea that anyone could ever put up with something like that.

Nie Huaisang self-consciously raised a hand to touch his nose, before quickly dropping it to his side, embarrassed by this habit he’d picked up.

“It’s a little more complicated than that,” he grumbled. “But I guess I did help him pass. And, well… if you want to be friends, I have no issues with that.”

“We’ll see about it,” Jin Zixuan retorted, before turning around and returning to his own group, as if it might dirty him to spend too much time with people who weren’t Jins.

Jin Zixuan was lucky to have such a pretty face and to be so rich, because it certainly wasn’t his personality which would make him friends, Nie Huaisang thought. He was at least as annoying as Jin Zixun, even though it was in a different manner.

He must not have been the only one to have that impression. When he turned his attention back toward the Jiang disciples, all of them save for Meng Yao were glaring in the direction of Jin Zixuan. Worse still, when their eyes wandered toward Nie Huaisang, it was clear that mere association with Jin Zixuan had instantly branded him as unpleasant to them. That was odd, though. Everyone knew that there was an engagement between Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli, so surely there should have existed, if not friendship, then at least some degree of cordiality between disciples of their two sects. 

Nie Huaisang feared what starting with a disadvantage might do to the mission forced upon him, when already he wasn’t the best at making friends. But his eyes then met Meng Yao’s who, after whispering something to Jiang Cheng, walked toward Nie Huaisang and even bowed to him with far more deference than anyone had ever bothered to show before.

“Nie-gongzi, I am glad we meet again,” Meng Yao said. “I never had a chance to thank you before for your help that day.”

“I hardly did anything at all!” Nie Huaisang protested, waving his hands in embarrassment. “In fact, you were even hurt by my fault that time!”

“And yet I must insist in expressing my gratitude. If not for you and Lan gongzi standing up for me, I would not have been given a chance to become a cultivator, which has been my greatest dream since childhood. For this, I am in your debt.”

Nie Huaisang blushed a little. “Really, it was nothing. Any decent person would have done the same! And with a potential like yours, it was only natural that someone would take you as a student someday! How’s Yunmeng treating you? Are they nice to you? You can tell me if they’re not, and I’ll tell my da-ge, and he’ll tell them to be nice. But it’s Yunmeng, of course they’re probably nice, right?”

His rambling surprised Meng Yao, who appeared a little unsure how to answer. Probably he’d expected the young master of a great sect to be a little more eloquent than that, the way Lan Xichen was, or even Jiang Cheng. But it was difficult to keep cool in front of the boy who would have become the man who had killed Nie Mingjue.

How could that have even happened? Even after months in Lotus Piers, Meng Yao remained shorter than Nie Huaisang, and barely any heavier. How could someone like that…

“I think we’re treating him fine,” Jiang Cheng said in a dry voice as he joined them. “Though your concern commends you, Nie gongzi.”

Nie Huaisang jumped in surprise, and quickly bowed to him.

“Of course I didn’t mean to imply… and, well, he’s here to study, so clearly he is well treated, and your father must be quite impressed with him,” Nie Huaisang said, fidgeting with his sleeve. “I’m quite glad that things worked out so well!”

That other Jiang boy, the tall and handsome one, also joined them and threw an arm around Meng Yao’s shoulders to pull him close.

“It’s not Jiang-shushu who’s impressed with Meng Yao, it’s Yu-furen,” the boy said with a bright grin. “She’s the one who said he should come, because we’re less stupid when he’s with us.”

“She said you’re less stupid,” Jiang Cheng scoffed. “Don’t drag me down with you.”

“Yu-furen also thinks that having Meng Yao with us means that stupid peacock will keep his distances,” the other boy continued, unbothered by that interruption. “She’s really so scared that we’ll start an argument with him.”

“You would!”

“Only if he insults Shijie! Which he would, because he’s nothing but a self-important…”

“Wei Wuxian!” Jiang Cheng hissed. “Can you not shut up just for a moment?”

The boy just laughed, while Nie Huaisang stared.

Surely there had to have been a mistake. That couldn’t be Wei Wuxian. There was simply no way that Lan Wangji would ever become even a little attracted to a person such as this, who was bold enough to insult Jin Zixuan within earshot, who was so careless regarding Meng Yao’s obvious discomfort at having the connection mentioned. Sure Wei Wuxian wasn’t half bad looking, but with a personality like that, Lan Wangji would only try to murder him, not kiss him.

“You know, if the teacher isn’t here yet, we can probably leave,” Wei Wuxian said. “That’s what we’d do at home. Let’s ditch the lesson and go have fun!”

Oh, Lan Wangji was so going to murder him when they met. Surely Nie Huaisang’s future self had to be mistaken about those two. 

“Hey, Wei-xiong, you shouldn’t say things like that,” Nie Huaisang advised. “There’s some people that might punish you if they heard you talk like this!”

“Sure, but the point is that the teacher isn’t here, so I have nothing to fear. Come on, Nie-xiong, it’s your second year here, right? Surely you’d rather run off to have fun with us than sit through some boring lectures again!”

As a matter of fact, Nie Huaisang very much wanted that. Considering how badly his studies went the year before, he had no reasons to think he would do any better that year either, so having fun would be a great use of his time. But that would upset Nie Mingjue, who didn't need that. And it might also disappoint Lan Xichen, which would be the worst thing ever. Having discovered that he enjoyed being praised, and how willing to do just that Lan Xichen was, Nie Huaisang didn't want to risk upsetting his friend. 

"When I say there's people you shouldn't make angry, I don't mean just Lan Qiren," Nie Huaisang warned. "He's mostly manageable, if you just avoid talking back and cry a little when he gets angry. But his nephew Lan Wangji is a real terror, and they've put him in charge of overseeing punishment for the juniors. You're lucky he's in seclusion at the moment, because just for speaking of skipping classes, he'd have your skin. He takes rules very seriously!"

"The teacher's nephew, uh," Wei Wuxian said with an odd smile. 

"You're thinking something unwise," Meng Yao accused. 

"Please don't go bother that guy as soon as he leaves his seclusion," Jiang Cheng warned. "Mother will murder you if you disgrace our sect!" 

Wei Wuxian's grin only grew wider, to the great anxiety of the other three. 

"That nephew, he wouldn't happen to be a very handsome boy?" Wei Wuxian asked. "About my size, very handsome…" 

"His brother looks much better," Nie Huaisang interjected without thinking. "Lan Wangji always looks so crossed… but he has a fine enough face, yes."

"And a silver sword that gives off a cold impression?" 

"Did you already meet him?" Nie Huaisang asked. 

"Yes, last night." 

"Last night?" Jiang Cheng repeated. "How… there's a curfew in place here! Are you already breaking rules?" 

Without a shred of regret or shame, Wei Wuxian started telling the story of his escape to buy wine, his attempt to return in secret, and his fight with Lan Wangji. Upon hearing that tale Jiang Cheng was furious, Meng Yao was worried, and Nie Huaisang so delighted he had to cover his mouth with both hands not to laugh. 

Lan Wangji losing his temper! Lan Wangji getting in a fight, and not even winning it! Lan Wangji failing to punish a criminal! It was the funniest Nie Huaisang had ever heard, and he couldn't wait to share all of it with Su She who would surely be just as entertained. 

This Wei Wuxian was a much more interesting person than anticipated, and Nie Huaisang could see himself becoming quite fond of him, even though he'd been determined to dislike him before. But that had been when he thought that his future self and Lan Wangji approved of him, two people whose opinion he didn't value much. 

"Wei-xiong, you are so dead," Nie Huaisang cheerfully announced when the other had finished his story. "It's going to be a matter of pride now, he's going to have his eye on you for the entire time you'll be here!" 

And for more than that, if Nie Huaisang’s future self was to be believed. That old prick didn't seem the sort to prank others, but it was also difficult to imagine Lan Wangji falling in love with someone like Wei Wuxian. People said that opposite attracted, but there were limits. Then again, it would be immensely funny if these two did become a couple. If it happened, Nie Huaisang might laugh to death. 

"That Lan Zhan is probably too busy to bother with me," Wei Wuxian claimed. "And it's not like he comes to the lectures, right? So I'm not worried in the least. Besides, I'm more than his match in a fight!"

The arrival of Lan Qiren, who seemed in as bad a humour as Nie Huaisang had ever seen him, cut short that conversation, though Wei Wuxian still looked quite sure of himself as they all entered the classroom. He only deflated a little when they all noticed that there already was a student sitting there, a Lan boy who only looked up from the scroll he was reading to glare at Wei Wuxian. In turn, Wei Wuxian did appear a little startled, having clearly not expected that his new nemesis would be there.

It took Nie Huaisang all of his self control not to laugh at this situation.

The plot to help Lan Wangji find a cultivation partner had held little joy when he had believed Wei Wuxian to be the second Jade's equal in temper. But discovering that Wei Wuxian was a wild spirit, sure to drive Lan Wangji mad with annoyance and to distract him from his duties, delighted Nie Huaisang. It was the funniest thing in the world.

It was the stuff of great romances, something which might blossom into a love story people would talk about for ages. Two people of opposite temper, of opposite values even, learning to see each other’s worth… it would be quite fun to watch that unfold, and even more amusing to give it a push here and there.

Helping the romance of others was the closest to living his own that Nie Huaisang was likely to get, so he’d have to content himself with that.

His lack of appealing skills made it unlikely he’d ever provoke the sort of strong sentiment already at play between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. But even a more talented nature would not have changed his delicate position as his brother's heir. Until his brother married and had children, Nie Huaisang knew it would be unwise of him to flirt with anyone of his own choosing, not when the Nie clan might someday require him to make a good match. The only reason he wasn’t already engaged to anyone, he suspected, was because there weren’t many girls of the right age among the greater sects, and because his brother disliked the idea of using him as a political tool unless absolutely necessary.

It was not easy, being next in line to inherit a sect, and Nie Huaisang was quite happy that he wasn’t in love with anyone at all. He only wished a little to be like Wei Wuxian, as a servant's son, free to live as he pleased as long as he did not bring any scandal for his sect. And it was lucky that Lan Wangji's status was not quite as dire as Nie Huaisang’s, not when he had a brother who was more likely to get married than Nie Mingjue, and even a relatively young uncle who could well have children of his own if needed. 

Lucky them indeed, but Nie Huaisang was determined not to envy them.

He’d just have his share of fun watching them… and maybe he’d see if Lan Xichen could be convinced to help too, just so they’d have another thing to laugh about together.

[shozaii]

can u pls gib me kunikida and dazai fluff hcs? i love them sm

(a/n):hello anon! why, of course hehe🥰thank you so much for the request!

@amourzai my cielo helped me with this fic ilysm☁🌹

masterlist 

-------------------------------

fluffy hc’s 

pairings: dazai x reader, kunikida x reader

warnings: none!

dazai osamu

despite being the chaotic person that he is, dazai tends to turn into the mushy soft puddle when he’s with you. swoons around you, always shows you his best side, brags about him being better than chuuya, basically what you see him do to atsushi, but it’s ten times more emphasized and complex.😌

when he wants to confess his feelings, he does it in a quiet, peaceful place. namely, while watching the yokohama sunset. may or may not have found time to walk back home alone with you, held your hand and locked his arm around yours. “i need to show you something special, love~.”

feelings to him is something so cherished, so sophisticated and important. as a person who has gone through a series of emotions; he prefers to let them out in private.

even kneels down and asks, “would you be mine, mon cheri?” while rubbing little circles on the back of your hand.

when dazai confesses, his eyes would look directly into yours. if anything were to bother him; consider his other side to be seen. and we all know we don’t want that to happen.

i don’t know why but i always imagine dazai’s hands to be soft and delicate, and lovely to hold. (yes, i have seen too many gifs of them and i am in love) anything he does with his hands are just so attractive.

blows kisses when he’s like across you. so it becomes a series of sending each other kisses when you’re like one metre apart....and when he really does miss it, he gets up from his seat, leans over and pecks your lips real quick.

height difference is pretty obvious between him and his s/o(unless you’re super tall :0). if you were shorter, consider the t e a s i n g 24/7. if you were nearly as tall/taller than him, the floor is all yours🥴

lowkey wish i was taller rn

okay but real talk - he loves carrying you bridal style. a lot. and here’s the thing, it happens at random timing. for instance, when you’re working on your latest paperwork. during a mission (just to boast how strong he is). very unpredictable but so adorable, you can’t help but blush harder.

“osamu! put me down or else....!”

“or else what, my honey bunch?”

“you’re not getting kisses for a week.”

mans sets you down with raptor speed. unless if he’s in a flirty mood, you would see yourself winning.

yes, he loves seeing you flustered. i feel like you can do so as well - but i headcanon him winning everytime. how do you win this...? maybe kiss him when he least expects it. do it.

cute pet names like belladonna, my love, mon cheri, any new language he learns, he uses them. and if he almost forgets them(because he collects so much), he writes them down on a sticky note, and sticks it on his desk. when he goes back to the dorms, he sticks it on the wall or some place he could remember.

dates with dazai are either during work hours, or the after hours of yokohama. and he makes sure you’re going to have the time of your life on every single date; so he plans a new activity on every one of them.

when he doesn’t have the chance to do so, he pouts. but when it has been replaced with a job given by the president/kunikida, there you go. a date and mission in your hands.

he gets this rush of energy when he realizes that what was supposed to be a relaxing date out just got a whole lot better with the mission.

dazai gives kisses anywhere he likes. nose, lips, cheeks, jawline, the list goes on. he even knows where you prefer him to do so. i’m surprised that he still isn’t a psychic.

double suicide? he would never think of it. all his life, he wants to find a reason to live. he does get his reasons - one of them is you. your tears to him are anguish and heartbreak at its worst. cue you crying while telling him to stay by your side. 

“please...never leave my side,” you sobbed as you buried your face in his chest. “if i can stay alive in this place we call earth for as long as possible, then so can you.”

that moved him so much. a whole lot. “oh, belladonna. don’t you ever think i’m going away.”

silence.

“not without you.”

you punched him, and he couldn’t stop laughing. but he’d stop, giving you an unlimited amount of kisses.

b a b y. dazai is babie.

kunikida doppo

oh my god we have baby number 2.

in his eyes, you were the definition of perfection. he even tries to remember exactly when did he catch feelings for you. it was totally unexpected, according to him.

cue almost all of the members of ada teasing him all the time about him finally finding his ‘ideal’ partner.

but to him, it wasn’t the ideal that mattered anymore. you outmatched almost everything he wrote down. and man, was he the happiest person alive.

how does he confess...? well wonderful question. he didn’t plan it. the members did.

maybe yosano-san called you and told you about another ‘crucial case’ a few blocks away from your completed one and ‘since you were out there, you were perfect for it.’ you agreed because why not?

meanwhile, dazai probably said, ‘this case involves yet another series of men wearing glasses - you and me must go out to end this person.’

of course kunikida goes ??? ‘where are the evidences/pictures???” but dazai brushes it off saying ‘ah~ i left them somewhere.’ to which,,,well you already know. they went out and not even a minute after, the bandaged man goes missing. with the intercom, he leads him to - you guessed it - the exact same place you were in.

‘kunikida! you’re here for the non-existent case too...?”

‘non-existent? OHMYGODDAZAI-’

the line was cut off, and he goes on and on about him, until;

‘i can never be the same when i’m with someone i obliviously like-,’

he’s a huge mess when he’s around you, trust me. so him blabbering that out loud is completely normal.

butterflies in your stomach because you’re so in love with him.

‘i don’t know if this is the right time, but our friends probably did this for us. so i hope you’d be okay if i said my feelings are mutual?”

kunikida is alright with just a little pda, maybe some hand-holding and little ruffles on your hair because he secretly loves how floofy it is🥺when it comes to kissing, the furthest he would go is on your head. nothing more, nothing less.

he needs to maintain his composure *cough* but my mans right here couldn’t, you’re just too perfect.

so when you’re two alone, expect lots and lots of wholesome kisses around your face; and also loads of cuddles. this side of kunikida is what i headcanon today, folks. the ‘soft for you’ side. he lovesss it when he kisses your forehead, he finds it so cute.

p l e a s e kiss him on the cheek, kunikida would be all over the place.

if you go somewhere on a mission with someone else, he would be on his feet. he gets so worried, thinking of what might happen. don’t get me wrong, he trusts you in your job so much; he just doesn’t want you to get hurt.

so when you do return, he’s the first one at the door.

checks if you’ve eaten, if you’ve drank enough water, if you’ve gotten enough sleep. if you’ve not he’s just going to pull you to bed, holding you tight and lulling you to sleep.

during work hours, you walk over to him, wrapping your arms. 

‘y/n....we only do this after work.’

‘so you don’t want my hugs then?’

stays silent and just lets you stay there for as long as you want. he will tolerate you and you only.

kunikida loves you a lot. sometimes he might not show it, but just know that the love he has for you is drastic it tears you up. 

--------------------------------------------------

(a/n): i am s o r r y this took so long! ahh i’ve had so much to do and i really do hope this was worth it!

[shoutaaizawas]

hii :) can i request shoto with either a college au or fake dating au with the prompt “kiss me again” FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF (nfsw if it flows and ONLY if you want) please

thank you for the request! i always forget how much i like writing todoroki. im sorry but i don’t do nsfw but please take my offering of a kissing scene haha

↳ todoroki shoto x reader → ❝all-nighter❞

event: au!prompts summary: you never expected to become friends with shoto todoroki but when you need to share a book for a project due in the morning you end up bonding. word count: 1,939 tags/warnings: fluff, incident with a creepy guy at a party, comfort, first kiss a/n: i don’t know what college is like bear with me. thanks to @lilli-chae for the college insight. also im giving myself a reward for writing and posting before ten at night lol

Todoroki Shoto was the last person you ever expected to befriend. He was a rich boy from a rich family and those were people you usually tried to steer clear of. He was always silent, if someone asked you what he sounded like you wouldn’t be able to answer them. And he always stared, it wasn’t in a creepy way like some guys but it still unsettled you. You had a few classes with him but had only heard a few words from him.

The first time you ran into him he was lost on campus. It was oddly endearing, the sight of him standing there looking around confused. You asked him where he was going and it happened to be the same class as you. He hadn’t said much except for a ‘thank you’ once you reached the class.

It wasn’t until one night at the library that you started to see him differently. You had a project due the next day. Had you received it weeks ago? Yes, but in your defense, you had a lot of other projects. Okay, maybe you had procrastinated too much. It was late and you needed a specific textbook for the assignment. With your ice coffee in hand, you made your way to the library ready to pull an all-nighter.

As you reached for the book you were already so exhausted you hadn’t realized that someone else was reaching for it at the same time.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” You said looking up only to see Todoroki.

“Sorry.” He said, looking sheepish.

“I’ll grab another copy-” As you looked at the shelf you realized there was only one. “Oh.”

“My project is due tomorrow, otherwise I would offer to use it after you.” He said.

“Mine too.” You said. “We could share it if you don’t mind.”

“That seems like the best option.” He agreed.

The two of you set up at a table big enough for both of you to spread out. It turns out you had the same topic for the same class.

“So do you procrastinate a lot too?” You said trying to break the ice with some humor.

“Not normally.” He said but didn’t elaborate.

“I wish I could say the same but this happens to me more than I’d like to admit.” You said. “You can use it first, I have to get it started before I need the information.”

Shoto nodded and took the book before getting to work.

It was surprising how likable Shoto was once he opened up. He was a bit stiff and awkward but he was really funny and very considerate. You felt bad judging him on his family status. He was nothing like the rich brats you had encountered in the past.

The two of you would take breaks, you would offer him snacks, and most likely due to the sleep exhaustion, you shared a lot of personal stories. His family was something else. The more you got to know him all the pieces of who he was fit together.

The last thing you expected was to wake up with your head on his shoulder in the library the next morning.

“Shoto.” You said nudging him awake. You looked at your phone, you had less than ten minutes to get to class for your presentations. “Wake up we have to hurry.” You said.

Shoto’s different colored eyes opened and looked at you in confusion before he realizes where he was.

The two of you quickly scrambled to pick up all of your stuff and run to class. Thankfully everything had been pretty much done before you fell asleep but you were upset you wouldn’t be able to grab a coffee to wake you up before class.

Since that night you considered Shoto a friend. You would study together sometimes and grab a coffee or lunch between classes. You found yourself confiding in him and he did the same with you.

“When did you and our school’s prettiest boy become best friends?” Your friend Mina asked.

“I think best friend is a bit strong, we just barely started hanging out.” You said.

“Well, best friend was me going easy on the teasing. The real question is when did you capture his icy heart?” Mina teased.

“Wow, okay. There has been no capturing of icy hearts.” You defended as your face heated up. Sure, Shoto was handsome and you liked his personality a lot but that didn’t mean you had a crush on him and you knew there was no way he would have a crush on you.

“Have you seen the way he looks at you?” She questioned.

“Yeah, he looks at me like he does everyone else.” You said.

“If that’s what you want to tell yourself,” Mina said throwing her hands up.

“It is what I’ll be telling myself.”

You did your best to push Mina’s words away but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t try to sneak glances at the way Shoto looked at you. Was his gaze softer when he looked at you? It had to just be your mind making it up.

It was a Friday night and that meant parties. Normally you were more of a stay at home and play video games and eat snacks kind of person but your friends wanted to go out and it had been a while so you agreed.

You ended up at a party on campus, it felt like almost everyone from school was there. You found yourself looking for one person in particular but you couldn’t spot him. Your heart sank a little bit, one of your motivations for going out was the hope that you would see Shoto.

You hadn’t meant to drink that much, you really didn’t have that many drinks but your tolerance wasn’t the greatest. You were having a good time, dancing with your friends. That was until some guy grabbed at you. Instinctually you hit him across the face gaining most people’s attention.

“Did he touch you?” A familiar voice said, your classmate Bakugou stood at your side in an instant with an intimidating glare. He was a bit over the top but underneath it all, he was a nice guy. Mina hung out with his group a lot and you had tagged along at times.

“Yeah.” You nodded. You didn’t have to say another word before Bakugou was dragging him out of the party, his friends Kirishima, Denki, and Sero following along. Mina rushed to your side pulling you out of the party in the opposite direction.

“Are you good?” She asked.

It was nice, the cool air of the night. Your head had been spinning but the ordeal had sobered you up a lot.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You told her.

“What happened?” A concerned voice interrupted. Shoto approached with concern on his face.

Mina explained what had happened and you saw an anger in Shoto you hadn’t seen before. He moved to the direction he assumed Bakugou had taken the man but you grabbed his arm.

“Can you get me out of here?” You asked him. You didn’t want him getting involved, this had been bad enough. You just wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened.

“Of course.” He said before looking to Mina. She nodded and Shoto placed his had between your shoulder blades and guided you away. “Are you hungry?”

“I could eat.” You answered.

The two of you ended up in a 24/7 diner not too far away. Sitting down in a booth under the fluorescent lights you already felt better just being in Shoto’s presence.

It was quiet. You ordered water and chicken strips. You weren’t sure what to say, you didn’t want to talk about what had happened and Shoto seemed upset.

“I should have been there sooner.” He finally said. “My father called me, held me up.”

Was he blaming himself for not being there?

“Shoto, it’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault. I’m just happy that I got to see you tonight and to be honest hanging out here is a lot better than at that loud house.”

Shoto sighed but his expression softened.

“I’m glad I’m getting to spend time with you too.” He said.

After that the mood was more relaxed, you talked about different things and laughed at Shoto’s jokes. Once you were done eating Shoto paid for your food, refusing to let you do so before he walked you back to the dorm you shared with Mina.  

“Do you want to stay for a bit?” You asked.

“Aren’t you tired?” He asked.

“I don’t want to be alone.” You admitted quietly.

Shoto walked in without a word. You sat on your bed opening up your laptop putting on something to watch before placing it on the table beside your bed. Shoto hesitantly joined you, sitting beside you leaving some space.

In retrospect you probably had a little leftover liquid courage from your drinks earlier when you scooted over closer to him, your leg pressed against his. Or maybe you just needed the comfort of having someone you trust close.

It was nice. The sound of Shoto’s soft breathes, the warmth that came from him, the way his arm brushed against yours. It was all comforting and helped the tenseness in your body melt away.

Before you could stop yourself you rested your head against his shoulder, you tensed for a moment waiting for a reaction but Shoto said nothing. A few moments later you were shocked when he took your hand in his softly. You couldn’t stop yourself from looking up at him. His soft gaze was already on you.

It felt unavoidable, unstoppable, the need to lean up and press your lips against his. At that moment you didn’t think of any consequences the action could have. It just felt right. Shoto didn’t pull back, rather he leaned forward meeting you halfway. His right hand cupped your cheek, you felt so small in his grip. His left hand moved to your waist pulling you closer.

After a moment you pulled back to take a breath.

“Kiss me again,” Shoto said. You smiled at him and leaned in again. You adjusted yourself so you could wrap your arms around him, holding him close. It felt unreal. How could things change so quickly in one moment? In one second Shoto was your friend who you may or may not have a crush on and in the next you were kissing him wondering how you could ever lie to yourself.

How could you not like Shoto? He was so good to you, so interesting in every way. Every day your thoughts drifted to him whether you tried to stop them or not. You couldn’t get him out of your head. When you saw a cute dog you thought ‘I bet Shoto would like to see this dog.’ When you ate at a new place you thought ‘I think Shoto would like the food here.’

How had you convinced yourself you didn’t like him?

“I really like you.” You said pulling back again but keeping your hold on each other.

“I really like you too.” He whispered against your lips, looking deeply into your eyes. “Go on a date with me. Please.”

“How can I say no?” You smiled before kissing him again.

“Hey, how are you doing?” Mina’s voice filled your dorm room as the door opened. You and Shoto froze as Mina stared. “Nevermind, looks like you’re doing great.” She said before shutting the door and leaving.

“I’m never gonna hear the end of it from her.” You sighed.

[wisteria-lodge]

snake primary + snake secondary (bird model)

Hello! I recently discovered your blog and really love the thought you’ve put into the nuances of the SHC system. I’m super into these kinds of personality analysis systems (I’ve probably been through them all at this point) because I think it’s interesting to know how people tick - I also think self-awareness is important so that you know why you do what you do, essentially. I took the SHC quiz and it told me I was a Snake Primary with a Bird Model, and a Bird Secondary with a Snake Model. I agree that I’m probably a (somewhat petrified) Snake Primary with a strong Bird Model, but I’m not sure which is my true secondary and which is the model. Maybe you can help?

I can sure try :)

Some things about me: I’m an oldest daughter, and I’m almost 100% sure my dad is a Bird Snake and I *idolized* him as a child - I thought he had it all figured out. He was the Zeus to my Athena in my child’s eyes, and I think I got my Bird primary model very early from copying him.

I mean, I know what you mean in a “sole creator” sense, but there is no *way* Athena thought Zeus had it all figured out.

My two younger brothers are a Lion Snake and a Lion Badger, and my mother is possibly a Double Badger, though I’m not as sure about her - maybe she just thinks that she *should* be a Double Badger. I think all that is important to help illustrate that I didn’t really feel *at home* when I was with my family, though I loved them, since I was the only Snake. My parents also had a terrible relationship and are now divorced, so there’s that as well. I think the only time I have ever been truly morally outraged was the revelation that my dad had engaged in infidelity against my mom, and then again when he started dragging his feet over a promise the he had made my youngest brother. We didn’t speak for a long time after that incident, but I was really cut up over dropping him.

Oh yeah. That’s very Snake primary. Morally outraged because your People are getting hurt.

We eventually started to reconcile, and the only reason we did was because he called and said he was driving through my city one day, and even after all of that, I said yes to meeting up because I felt sad that I had dropped him. I think this family dynamic, plus some other childhood stuff, led to me sort of “checking out” and petrifying pretty early.

Just a theory - I think it’s possible that this hit your secondary more than it hit your primary. You seem pretty strong and confident in your Snake primary so far. Even the fact that you can identify it coming from such a non-Snake environment, and don’t feel guilty about it, is big.

I had a lot of trouble making friends in school.

I’m thinking this might be more of a secondary thing.

and generally ended up with like one friend who was the other weird girl, and who I always sort of kept at arm’s length emotionally. I moved schools several times as a kid and after the first best friend (who was the daughter of my mom’s best friend and was like a sister to me until she moved away), I really didn’t try too hard to make new “best” friends.

Hmm. See, this reads like a *default* friend to me, not a friend of choice. The other weird girl. The daughter of your mom’s friend. That’s an easy friend to have… and not one that you necessarily sought out. I’m not surprised that your primary didn’t latch onto her with that Snake intensity.

Even now, though I definitely have concentric circles of loyalty and a significant other who is my “top person”, I’m not sure I have that blind Snake I-would-literally-die-for-you loyalty toward anyone - I’d kill or hide a body for my top circles

That *is* Snake loyalty. Snakes aren’t going to die for someone else, are you kidding? That’s a sucker’s game. They value themselves too much.

I would give up a lot of my own comfort for my significant other. Maybe I’m just afraid to let myself feel that unquestioning loyalty, though I want to feel it, or maybe I’m really a Bird and just want to be a Snake because that would mean I could be un-broken eventually.

Let’s talk about your secondary, I want to hear about how you think you’re broken, because so far you seem fine. Congrats on the SO!

I don’t think I’m an Idealist though - I’m surrounded by them and I know I don’t care about “principles” the way they do. Then again, maybe I’m a Bird whose truth is that moral relativism is the truth lol. Anyway, I think for my primary, I’m probably a petrified Snake with a Bird model unless I’m totally wrong about myself.

I think you’re just a Snake who… is a Snake.

(you’ve got that Birdy influence though, from your dad, and they do like to complicate things.)

As for my secondary, I loved to read (everything - all kinds of fiction, especially sci-fi/fantasy/mystery and, like, Victorian sci-fi/horror adventures, nature books, medical texts, etc. Wikipedia was a revelation when it came out), and I was smart and good at taking tests and knowing the answers in school, so at a certain point I think I just defaulted to being “the smart one” and used that as armor to help keep people from getting too close.

yep yep yep, welcome to the ‘fun Bird model’ club, we have snacks

I do genuinely love to learn, and I’ve always been known among friends and family as the one who either knows the answer or will look it up. I love pop culture trivia and nature facts. I also love and am good at debate, but not really when real feelings are involved - I more love the “battle of wits” aspect, where I can match up against a person to see if my knowledge and ability to adapt my argument on the fly can stump them. 

I also would argue the unpopular point, or the point I didn’t agree with, just for sport. Fun Bird secondary model.

I developed terrible anxiety and probably some depression as well in high school.

Okay, now I’m seeing the problem.

and now that I’m older, I suspect that I may have ADHD, though I haven’t been officially assessed. I didn’t discover my executive function issues really until college, when suddenly being smart and being able to figure out the test answers through context clues and what I remembered from lectures and readings + whatever trivia I had gathered about the topic wasn’t enough anymore.

I suspect you’re right about being ADHD. Or at least being neruodivergent.

I am horrible at studying! I would plan out my study sessions and make these nice little cheat sheets (these were allowed on exams) and they didn’t work at all! I did very well in my literature minor though, because all the graded assignments were papers rather than open-answer tests, and I could get my thoughts out better and with more resources at my disposal if I forgot something and needed to go back to the book to check.

Oh ouch. Yeah, I’m not even relating this back to a secondary, because I’m reading this as a working memory thing? Like ugh tests are such a terrible way access knowledge. What is even the *point* of memorization anymore? You should have been able to have a college career that was completely writing papers, like I did.

I was at one point very jealous of my Lion Snake brother, who I felt could do “whatever he wanted” with minimal consequences, while I always felt constrained by being “good” and not rocking the boat too much with my family.

Yep. That’s being an oldest daughter.

I couldn’t understand why he didn’t seem to care about being considerate to everyone else in the household (especially my chronically overworked, can’t-say-no Badger mom lol).

It’s because he’s the youngest. Mine’s the same.

This attitude was definitely influenced by my anxiety issues at that time, since I had (and still have) a lot of trouble asking for anything - help, permission, whatever. I’d rather do things and explore on my own, without anyone watching, so I don’t have to ask and don’t have to explain.

Did you low-key raise your younger siblings? Because it sounds like you raised your siblings.

I feel better with a little bit of distance, and definitely wear masks in most situations. I’d say my masks are half conscious and half reactive - I do have some idea of how I’d like to be perceived, but it’s only kind of systematic.

That makes me think Snake or Badger secondary.

I have a few “characters” that I use as touchpoints when I’m going into a new situation, but once I’m there I mostly just act nice and funny and see what happens.

So far I’m going with Badger secondary (be nice and and assume it’ll be fine is very badger) with a fun Bird secondary model, that you can do an Actor Bird thing with. Although liking to “just see what happens” is pretty snake.

The characters are really just costumes I use to give off a certain first impression, although I do really like the costumes and find them fun. I love clothes, makeup, and perfume too, because I enjoy the idea of making multidimensional costumes for different settings. I actually enjoy the mask a lot of the time - I have tattoos that are purposefully in places that I can cover easily, because I enjoy the idea that there’s something under the professional mask that people only know about if I show them. I’m a bit socially awkward I think (I repeat myself and talk a lot), but most people tend to either like me or tolerate me, and I don’t get into a lot of interpersonal conflicts. 

Hm. Either Courtier Badger or Snake secondary, fun Bird secondary model. However. Especially after talking about your Actor Bird in such fun, positive, happy language… I am going to call you out for “socially awkward” and “people tolerate me.” Which tells me you don’t have as much faith in your social skill set, and it’s *maybe* a little burnt.

(Also, not to get too armchair psychologist tell-me-about-your-mother, but if your mom has a  “chronically overworked, can’t-say-no” Badger secondary… that’s going to affect how you see Badger secondaries.)

Right now I work in a very Badger/Bird workplace, and it’s really a terrible fit, even though I can squeak by enough to fool my superiors into thinking I’m doing a good job. 

oh we’ve got some imposter syndrome, that can also be a burnt secondary thing.

It’s all long-term planning and daily maintenance tasks, and I really don’t like it. I change most of my plans partway through, but I’m not sure if it’s because I’m really an improvisational secondary at heart, or if I’m truly a Bird that’s just bad at planning for all of the variables.

I’m going to say you’re not a Bird. Making cheat-sheets (which is a very Bird secondary strategy) also did not work, and you feel confined by, not comforted by plans. You’re not a Lion, you enjoy keeping your true self to yourself too much. You could be either a Badger or Snake. And if you really hate daily maintenance tasks… that could be coming from a few places, but it makes me lean Snake. 

I love being in situations where I can iterate on a plan, or make a new plan on the fly. I love escape rooms and am pretty good at them; I still get stumped and need hints sometimes, but when I *get* a puzzle, it sort of just clicks for me? I don’t think in a very linear way and am not a good chess player, but I also have never studied chess so perhaps I just am at a knowledge disadvantage in that game. 

This is also you using Bird to have fun, and we know you *love* using Bird to have fun.

One of my proudest moments

okay this is definitely going to be helpful

was when I was on a day trip with my significant other, and we needed to find a place to buy food quickly so we wouldn’t miss a specific ferry and then a specific bus - we were on an island, and near the ferry station the restaurants were all too expensive and we were worried they would take too long anyway. He was starting to get frazzled, but I was able to think on my feet, and we just grabbed a calming beer (lol) at a creepy neighborhood bar, then got on the ferry and bought microwave meals at a 7-Eleven by the bus station. It was awesome and I was very proud of myself for staying calm and looking around myself for options.

Well that is VERY Snake secondary.

I generally take a long time making decisions when it’s not a crisis situation, because I have to *weigh all the options*, but I often end up in analysis paralysis. Crunch time is where I really shine as a decision-maker.

Snake again. From what I’m seeing, your Bird is a fantastic toy, but actually kind of makes you miserable when you have to depend on it for the important stuff. (studying, your job, making important decisions)

All of this long post is to say, I’m not sure whether my Bird secondary is a fun model that got repurposed into an executive dysfunction compensation tool and anxiety/depression soother to supplement my Snake secondary

I think you hit the nail straight on the head right there. 

 or if Bird is my true secondary and Snake is a model that I learned from my dad and brother + characters I admire in media 

oh your favorite characters are Snake secondaries are they? That’s a big tell.

and that I use when I fail to plan adequately given my executive dysfunction. 

Executive dysfunction is a whole thing, but you don’t have to “”plan adequately”” for everything.

I find both fun and both useful, but I’m not sure which is innate and which is the model! 

My money is on snake secondary, Bird secondary model.