#I could literally go on for 1500 years
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mgsdelta · 3 months ago
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being poor is literally so miserable
#i hate this so much i hope one day there is enough money for me to actually do something go somewhere buy something i want#and my bday is coming up and i have literally $0. i wish there was anything beyond just enough to pay rent (barely) and eat (sometimes)#idk im just bitching i guess but like holy fuck im so stressed 100% if the time and just wish i had room for a tiny bit of retail therapy#things should turn around soon i hope but then again it seems like money just evaporates no matter how much math i do#idk im just a leech anyways so i have no claim to any of it#and obviously when people are in the same situation as me their first thought isnt to give it away as a gift to someone else its to get#somerhing for themselves like i am saying i want to do. obviously. i would be in the same boat#but holy fuck i dont get graphic design commissions anymore because logos dont get changed very often so my only repeat customer hasnt come#back for more any time recently#and no one buys any of the products i make#and i dont have supplies to make anything new#and so i just wont have money.#god being poor fucking sucks so badly it sucks so fucking badly#i should be grateful i have a roof over my head but like holy fuck i wish i could relax let alone buy something for myself WITHOUT THE#PRESSURE OF FEELING LIKE IT HAS TO BE SOMETHING I CAN MAKE MY MONEY BACK FROM. i have a bad habit of thinking anything i do for myself that#doesnt somehow streamline a chore or produce soemthing i can sell or serve some purpose to other people aside from myself i shouldnt get it#even if i really want it#so i have a wishlist of like 1500 items ill probably never buy despite me still wanting them after years#i just look at them and imagine what itd be like to have them lmfao is that pathetic?#fellas is it pathetic to have desires#idk ive been stuck in this same exact spot for years and thats just how it goes#idk when the last time was that i actually bought something i just Wanted tbh. its all been needs or something rhat in my mind if i could#force myself to keep at it and really Create something that i could Sell it and get money out of it because thats all i fucking get a#chance to think about is money#another pathetic birthday for another dismal fucking year#^ peak pessimism#слова-паразиты
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steviescrystals · 6 months ago
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my dad confuses me on the daily
#so yesterday we got a new car for me since mine broke down (again) and is not worth fixing in his opinion#(i say ‘we’ bc i need a car for work but have literally no money rn so my dad bought it but i will be paying him back just to clarify)#and our budget was very low so we ended up getting a slightly beat up 2005 ford escape for $2000#the girl selling it was asking $2500 but my dad loves negotiating plus it needs a repair in the next couple months#and my dad was telling me used cars are way too expensive right now and even $2000 was too much especially since it needs a repair#but the repair is only gonna cost maybe $300 (very minor imo bc i’ve had a lot of way bigger issues in the past lol) and it’s not urgent#meanwhile my old car literally will not start and it’s going to cost at minimum $800 to fix#and we’re not positive if there’s another issue but more likely than not there is and it would actually be closer to $1500#which is why we’re not keeping it even though i wish i could#and my dad wants to try and sell it for $2000???#like first of all it’s from 1998 and has 220k miles on it and we didn’t even pay $2k for it we paid $1500#and he says it’s worth more bc we’ve put a lot of money into it over the years i’ve had it but like currently it is not functional at all#if someone buys it and is willing to pay $800-1500 to fix it they would also have to pay to tow it to a shop unless they can tow it themself#oh and not to mention there’s a big dent in the side that would cost another $700ish to fix bc of the spot it’s in#like as much as i love that car there is no way anyone is going to want it especially not for $2000 😭#unfortunately i think the best we can hope for is to find someone who will buy it for parts so rip to my baby#lj.txt
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dixons-sunshine · 7 months ago
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I Never Lived For The Applause | Daryl Dixon x Former!Celebrity!Fem!Reader
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Summary: Before the world quite literally ended, you were a famously known singer. However, your celebrity status didn't do you much good in the apocalypse, despite most people in your group giving you privileges that you didn't want. Thankfully, a certain redneck archer treated you like a normal person, unwillingly becoming the guy who caught your attention.
Genre: Angst, fluff.
Era: The quarry; the farm; the prison.
Warnings: Swearing, usual TWD warnings, suggestive themes.
Word count: 3.9k.
A/n: Okay but the former!celebrity!reader x Daryl was such a unique idea that an anon requested! I never would've thought about that on my own. I thought that this idea would be great combined with a few other requests, and this was born. There's a few time jumps and this is honestly not the best. I scrapped over 1500 words and this is all over the place, and it was supposed to be smut, and I don't really like this, but I hope you like it nonetheless.
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Before the apocalypse came to be, you were a famous singer and songwriter. You had multiple hit singles that made the charts and your concerts always sold out. It seemed like wherever you would turn, there would be someone there who would want an autograph or a picture. It seemed like you could never escape the spotlight.
Not even now, when the dead started rising and the world came to an end.
“Amy, I told you, I'm fine. I don't want your food. You need it more than I do.”
Amy shook her head defiantly, practically shoving the paper plate into your hands. “I insist. You're my idol, and I'll be damned if I let my idol go hungry when I have food I can give her.”
You sighed and reluctantly accepted the plate. “This is unnecessary. I already had my share, sweetheart. You don't have to give me yours when you also have to eat.”
“I'm fine. Rather me than you.”
Before you could protest, Andrea called Amy's name. Amy gave you an apologetic smile and bid you farewell, walking over to her sister and leaving you alone with your thoughts. You sighed and turned around, heading over to the tent you shared with your daughter. You opened the flap and stepped inside, seeing your twelve year old daughter, Nicolette, busy sketching in her sketchbook.
She looked up when she heard you step inside, sending you a smile. “Hi, Mom.”
“Hey, Nic,” you greeted her, sitting down on your cot opposite hers. “Why aren't you outside with the other kids?”
Nicolette shook her head, closing her sketchbook and sitting up in her cot. “Most of them treat me funny. They keep asking me if I can sing or if I can write songs, and if I got free stuff because you were famous. Only Carl and Sophia treat me like I'm a normal kid, but they're with their mom's right now.”
You sighed, guilt gnawing at you from the inside. Never once did you regret having your daughter, but sometimes you regretted having to raise her while you were in the spotlight. The paparazzi were relentless, and your daughter more often than not had to pay the price for that. It was unfair, and you wished that you could've just faded from the spotlight to raise your daughter in peace.
“I'm sorry, baby. If I knew back then what my fame could do to you, I never would have signed on with that record label. I wish I could take it back.”
Nicolette shook her head. She got up from her cot and sat down next to you, leaning her head on your shoulder. You wrapped your arms around her, placing a tender kiss on her head.
“It's not your fault, Mom. I don't blame you. You shouldn't, either.”
You shook your head. “That's easier said than done,” you replied, before adopting a more lighthearted tone. “But let's not talk about that. I've got some more food for you if you're hungry.”
Nicolette smiled at you and nodded eagerly. “I'm starving. Thanks, Mom.”
You smiled at her. However, before you could respond, a ruckus could be heard outside your tent. Both yours and your daughter's heads snapped in the direction of the two voices, instantly going quiet to hear what was happening.
“M'tellin ya, man. S'a fuckin' waste of time. We should jus' cut our losses here and scram. Take a few guns and food fer the road.”
“Merle, fer the last fuckin' time, we can't leave righ' now. It's too dangerous. We should wait 'til the heat dies down 'fore we go.”
“Wha' m'hearin' s'tha' yer a pussy. Wha's the matter, Darylina? Scared the geeks will get ya? 'Cause yer too incompetent to handle 'em?”
“Fuck off, Merle! It ain't like tha'. I jus' dun' wanna risk our lives if we dun' need to.”
“Whatever, man. M'goin' back to the tent.”
The man who's name you had learnt to be Merle left, his retreating footsteps growing fainter until you couldn't hear them anymore. However, you could clearly see the silhouette of the other man still outside your tent. You could hear him quietly muttering to himself.
Turning to Nicolette, you gently placed the plate with the food—cooked squirrel with some beans—onto her lap and stood up. You turned to her and leaned down to place a sweet kiss to her forehead.
“Eat up and get ready for bed. I'll be right back and then we'll continue reading that book.”
Nicolette nodded, and with that, you exited your tent. The man stood with his back to you, but a simple slight twitch of his head in your direction showed that he had heard you. His body stiffened visibly, and you frowned at that.
“Hey. You're Daryl, right?” you asked him, prompting the man to turn around.
However, he didn't meet your gaze, finding great interest in the ground below. He simply grunted his acknowledgement, a slight upwards nudge of his nose confirming your question.
“I'm Y/n. It's nice to officially meet you,” you introduced yourself, extending your hand to his for a handshake. Daryl made no move to shake it, however, making you awkwardly retract your hand. “I, uh, just wanted to say that you were right.”
“Wha'?” Daryl asked in confusion, his eyebrows furrowing. He hadn't meant for the question to slip from his lips, trying to just remain quiet until you got the message that he was in no mood to socialise, but he failed.
“That argument you had with your brother. You were right. It's way too dangerous to wander off on your own right now. Personally I feel like you shouldn't be wanting to go at all because it's safer with a group, but that's not my call to make. Just thought I'd let you know that your instincts are right. Don't listen to your brother.”
Daryl was confused by your niceness. He was even more confused by the fact that you agreed with him. He was so used to women taking Merle's side instead of his all the time, so this was something entirely new for him.
“Oh, uh, thanks,” he replied awkwardly, nervously chewing on his lower lip.
You smiled at him before nodding. “Okay, well, just wanted to tell you that. Oh, and to ask you not to argue in front of my tent again. I have a twelve year old in there who doesn't need to hear all of that.”
Daryl ducked his head, an embarrassed blush flushing over his face. “Sorry.”
“I guess I can let it slide this time,” you said with a smile. “And thanks for the squirrel. Thanks to you, my daughter doesn't have to go to bed hungry tonight. Never thought we'd have to resort to eating squirrel, but it's not that bad. It's actually kinda delicious. It's way better than—” Realising that you were busy rambling, you shook your head and gave him an apologetic smile. “Sorry. Just, thank you.”
Daryl didn't know why, but he felt an unexplainable pull to you. Maybe it was the way you showed him kindness without even knowing him, or maybe it was the fact that you were the only one who seemed to actually appreciate the food he brought back from his hunts, even if it was squirrels. Despite their hunger, everyone else mostly refused to eat anything he brought back if it wasn't deer. Yet there you were, thanking him for bringing back something as mediocre as squirrel.
And it certainly didn't help that he found you absolutely radiant.
“S'nothin',” he finally responded. “M'jus' glad yer lil' girl can eat tonigh'.”
“You're the one who brought back the squirrels?”
At the sound of a small voice, both you and Daryl turned around to face your daughter. Nicolette walked up to your side and beamed brightly up at Daryl, catching him off guard. The other kids in the camp were terrified of him and wouldn't even glance in his direction, yet this kid was not only looking at him, but willingly talking to him.
“Yes, he is,” you confirmed, smiling fondly down at your daughter.
Nicolette looked up at Daryl, realisation dawning on her. “You're the man with the crossbow! And the vest with the angel wings! You're so cool, sir. Do you think I could maybe shoot your crossbow one time? It's okay if you say no, but can I maybe see how you shoot it so that when I get my own crossbow one day, I know how to use it? Or—”
Daryl's lips subconsciously twitched up into a smile. Her rambling was so similar to yours. Like mother, like daughter, he thought to himself as he looked between the two of you. There were over a dozen similarities between you and Nicolette. She looked just like you.
You placed a hand on Nicolette's shoulder, halting her rambling. You turned to Daryl, giving him a smile. “We should probably get ready for bed. Goodnight, Daryl.”
“Night, Daryl!” Nicolette greeted him enthusiastically, following you into the tent.
“Night,” he whispered.
“Oh, and by the way, don't be a stranger. I'd love to see more of you.”
Daryl blushed and ducked his head. He hummed, not trusting his voice at that moment in time.
You smiled and finally entered the tent, zipping the tent closed behind you. He stood there for a couple of moments before turning and walking back to his own shared tent with Merle.
Daryl couldn't explain it, but for some reason, in that short conversation, he felt drawn to you. It was unnerving, but felt nice at the same time. And your daughter was downright an angel, your exact copy.
“Wha' were ya doin', sniffin' 'round tha' popstar?” Merle asked when Daryl entered the tent, catching him off guard. Daryl had assumed that Merle would've been passed out by now, high off of whatever drug he was using that night.
“Popstar? Wha' the hell are ya talkin' 'bout?” Daryl questioned, plopping himself down on his cot.
“Tha' woman ya were talkin' to, she was a singer 'fore all this. Real famous, too. Used to see her on TV and in magazine's all the time.”
Daryl's mind swarmed with questions. You were a famous singer? How the hell did you end up there, with a bunch of nobodies? And why had you thanked him for bringing back something as simple as a squirrel? If you were famous, you had probably eaten banquets of the richest, most delicious food out there, yet you enjoyed squirrel? And to top it off, why would you willingly want to hang out with him of all people?
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“Daryl, oh my god.”
At the sound of your panicked voice, Daryl slowly sat upright in the bed in the guest bedroom. He looked up and locked eyes with you, seeing the worry written all over your face. You hurriedly sat down on the edge of the bed next to him and gingerly reached out to touch the bandage around his side, careful not to add too much pressure and hurt him.
“M'fine, sunshine. Dun' have to worry 'bout me,” he replied, waving off your concern and gently grabbing your hand to push it away from the bandage.
You scoffed in disbelief and shook your head. “You're my friend, Daryl. Of course I'm going to worry about you. I care about you, and you expect me to not worry?” you asked, bringing your hand up to gently caress his cheek.
Friend. That word reminded Daryl of how you viewed him. It had been two months since your first interaction at the quarry and his affection and attraction to you had only grown stronger. However, it seemed to him like his feelings weren't reciprocated, so he settled on being your friend.
Little did he know that you felt the exact same way. You just didn't know it yet.
“Heard ya punched Andrea fer shootin' me. Any truth to those rumours?” Daryl asked, diverting the attention away from his now pounding heart as your fingers gently pushed his hair back.
You smiled sheepishly. “My hand slipped?” you tried, shrugging your shoulders.
Daryl smirked slightly and shook his head. “Sure. Whatever ya say, sunshine.”
You let out a sigh, reluctantly drawing your hand back from his hair. “She had it coming. We told her not to shoot and she didn't listen, trying to boost her own ego instead. She almost killed you, Daryl. That's not something she should be allowed to get away with, but Rick and Shane aren't gonna do anything, so I took matters into my own hands.”
Daryl smiled softly. “Not bad fer a popstar.”
You giggled. “Hey, I got into a couple of fights before my career took off. I know my stuff. I know how to shoot a gun, too, but that's a discussion for another day.”
Daryl chuckled and nodded. He shifted back against the headboard and gazed at you, simply admiring your beauty for a moment. It amazed him that a beautiful, kind, caring, smart woman like you would ever wanna be associated with the likes of him. You were perfect and he was, well, him. It didn't make sense, but he dared not to question it.
“Can I ask ya somethin' personal?” he blurted out before he could think about it.
You nodded at him. “Sure.”
“When ya talk 'bout yer career, it sounds like ya hated it. Why'd ya become a singer if ya hated it so much?”
You remained silent for a minute. Daryl feared that he had asked the wrong thing and was about to apologise, but you spoke up.
“I was nineteen when I signed with my first record label. I didn't want to be in the spotlight because singing was more of a hobby to me, but my parents forced me to. Growing up, there wasn't ever really any money around and my parents made it out like it was my fault. They made me feel like I owed them for everything they did for me, and they forced me to sign with that record label. My parents were my managers and all the money I earned for the songs I wrote and sang basically went to them. That went on for a couple of years until I met Nic's father. He was a bass player in a band I was collaborating with. I fell in love way too quickly, jumped into bed with him when he made an advancement and ended up pregnant. The guy didn't want kids and bolted, leaving me a single mom. My parents hated that and basically disowned me.”
“M'sorry to hear tha',” Daryl replied sympathetically. He didn't really know how to respond; he never knew that about you. You chose to keep your life before you had Nicolette private, and he respected that. He had his own demons he preferred to keep quiet.
“It's okay,” you reassured him, shaking your head. “He was an asshole. And I was better off without my parents. I managed to sign with a decent enough record label and the rest was history. I got a ton of backlash from haters for being a single mom. There were even rumours that I had cheated and that's why the guy left me, but that wasn't true. But none of that matters anymore. My reputation doesn't matter anymore. All that matters now is keeping my daughter safe and keeping the people I care about alive. People like you.”
“Ya shouldn't care 'bout me. S'a bad idea.”
“Well, bad idea or not, I care about you. And so does Nic.”
As if being summoned, Nicolette knocked on the door and hesitantly stepped inside. Daryl adjusted the covers over his body and sent her a tight-lipped smile. Nicolette gave him a small smile back but he could clearly tell it was strained. Her eyes were bloodshot from crying.
“Are you okay?” Nicolette asked, crossing her arms over her chest as if to make herself appear smaller.
“M'fine, kiddo. Dun' worry 'bout me,” he reassured her. “Hershel fixed me righ' up. I'll be outta here in no time.”
Nicolette looked to you for confirmation, and you nodded. “He's right. He'll be fine. Some antibiotics and he'll be up and at it in three days. You'll see.”
“Okay,” she nodded, her eyes flickering between you and Daryl. “I'm glad you're not dead, Daryl.”
Daryl chuckled at the girls forwardness. “M'glad m'not dead, too.”
You smiled at the small interaction between Daryl and Nicolette, your heart swelling with fondness. You stood up from the bed and motioned for Nicolette to follow you.
“C'mon, baby. Let's leave Daryl to get some rest, okay?”
“Actually, I was wondering if I could maybe stay?” she asked timidly, nervously fiddling with her hands. “It's just... I wanna stay.”
You looked at Daryl, and he shrugged nonchalantly. Despite his nonchalance, Daryl's heart swelled with fondness. This little girl, who owed him nothing, wanted to stay with him. He couldn't believe it.
“Okay, you can stay for a while. I'll be back later, okay?” you relented.
She nodded and sat down on the chair. You gave Daryl's hand one last squeeze before heading out, sparing one last look at the two. Nicolette was starting to retell some of the events of what her and Carl had gotten up to that day, and Daryl hummed in acknowledgement before looking up and locking eyes with you.
With one last parting smile, you headed out and made your way back to the tents. On your way there, a startling realisation hit you like a ton of bricks, one that would change the way you saw Daryl forever. Despite the fact that he could be snappy at times, and that he was known for being grumpy, he treated you with respect. He didn't care about who you were before the end of the world. He didn't care about your mistakes, about if you were famous or not. That didn't matter to him. He only saw you, the person behind the old tabloids, and he had become close with your daughter. He even took the time out of his day to teach her how to use his crossbow, even if she was a slow learner. And in that moment, you realised something:
You had feelings for him.
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“Y'know, m'glad Nic didn't have to meet her father. She's better off.”
You turned your head to Daryl, a look of confusion spreading across your features. “I agree with you, but why do you say that? You didn't know the man.”
Daryl shrugged, taking a drag from his cigarette and blowing the smoke away from you. “Ya said back at Hershel's tha' he never wanted kids. If he had stuck 'round, god knows wha' he would've done to her.”
“Yeah,” you agreed, turning your attention back to the darkness ahead of you. “She is better off.”
The night was relatively quiet, save for the distant sound of walkers groaning outside the prison's fences.  Daryl was on watch that night in the guard tower, and you had taken the initiative to join the archer that night. Everyone else had retreated into the prison for the night, leaving only you and Daryl awake.
“So are we gon' tell Nic 'bout us or not?” Daryl broke the silence, taking the last drag from his cigarette before putting it out next to him. “S'been over a month now. She deserves to know.”
Unbidden, flashes of that night a month ago arose in your mind. The feeling of his lips on yours, his hands exploring your body and the way he felt pressed against you. The feeling of your bodies becoming one was one that you wouldn't forget anytime soon, but the one memory you'd hold with you forever was the confession from the man next to you. After the heated, pleasurable moment you'd spent together, feelings were revealed, and you and the archer had unofficially started your relationship. You had both agreed to keep it a secret, but Nicolette was starting to get suspicious about the two of you.
“I'm okay with telling her tomorrow. She deserves to finally have confirmation on her suspicions,” you told him, leaning your head against his shoulder. “She already sees you as her dad, anyways.”
Daryl couldn't argue with that. Flashes of his own arose in his mind. A couple of days ago, he had returned from a run, battered and bruised. He could barely walk and both you and Nicolette were distraught. However, after he was patched up and resting in his cell and you were up in the guard tower for your shift, Nicolette had come to him in tears. He had hugged her tightly to his chest, acutely aware that she was transported back to that day on the farm when he had been shot. That night was the night Nicolette had confirmed that she saw Daryl as a father figure.
“Please don't leave. My mom needs you. I need you. We both need you in our lives. Please, Daryl.”
In that moment, even though she didn't know yet that you and Daryl were together, he knew that he wouldn't be able to live without either of you. You both were his entire world. Nicolette was his little girl. You were his partner, and there was no way he was letting either of you go.
“Dun' worry, Nic. I ain't goin' nowhere. I promise ya tha'.”
Shaken from his thoughts by your lips on his exposed shoulder, he turned his head to you, coming face to face with a mischievous smirk. He instantly knew what that smirk meant, and he helped you climb onto his lap.
“But,” you began, pulling his attention back to your previous discussion. “Let's worry about that tomorrow. Tonight, it's just me and you.”
Daryl smirked and attached his lips to yours. You may have been a popstar before the apocalypse, a celebrity living in a mansion, but in that moment, you were simply you. The woman Daryl cared for deeply, the woman Daryl was never gonna let go of.
Because in that moment, you were nothing but his.
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larluce · 4 months ago
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I had an idea for a Post canon merthur AU!!
I don't know if you have seen Sakura Card Captor? Well, there is a character called Yukito that has double personality/two alter egos. One that is a regular human being with sunshine personality called Yukito and the other that is a literal Angel/powerful creature that is cold and merciless called Yue. The interesting thing about this character is that, while Yue is aware that Yukito exists and can access to Yukito's memories, Yukito doesn't have the same privilege. Yukito, as far as he knows, he is just a regular teen student that sometimes has mental gaps.
So I wondered, what if Merlin, due to all the trauma he went through or maybe through a spell he did to himself, splited his personality in two so he could handle the long wait for Arthur's return better? One would be Emrys, the most powerful sorcerer that ever lived that also incarnates the worst aspects of him, basically Dark Merlin in all his glory, and the other one would be a Merlin without his memories, ergo, without all his traumas, his personality would be series 1 innocent Merlin, but this Merlin doesn't have magic (or rather he has it, but is blocked) and he thinks he is a common mortal man.
So one night Arthur finally returns and it's Merlin who finds him when he comes out of the lake (Emrys made sure Merlin always lived close to the lake). Of course, he's startled an somewhat scared but a feeling inside him urges him to help this stranger. The man is wearing a knight armor and talks old english for some reason. (Merlin never thought his extra studies in old english that he took for fun would actually come on handy). The man only says nonesense as he helps him out of the lake and takes him to his home thought. Apparently the stranger firmly believes he is King Arthur and that he is Merlin the wizard. He has to repeat him several times that he isn't, but they do share the name though.
Merlin: (gives Arthur a change of clothes and says in old english) Here. These are the biggest clothes I have. They might fit you and I put some blankets on the couch for you to sleep.
Arthur: (doesn't take the clothes and just stares at him)...
Merlin: (thinking he didn't speak the language correctly) I said-
Arthur: (heartbroken) You really don't remember me, do you?
Merlin: (sighs) No. I don't know you. I'm sorry.
Arthur: (almost desperate) You do! I don't know what they did to you or what happened to this place, but I'm going to figure it out. I promise!
Merlin: (smiles) Sure you will. (Thinks) He must have some mental affliction, poor man. (Says as he leaves the clothes on the couch) I'll get you some hot chocolate. (Makes a move to go to the kitchen, but has a sudden headache and faints)
Arthur: Merlin! (Runs and catches him before he hits the floor, worried) Merlin, are you alright? Please, wake up! Merlin (shakes him)
Emrys: (opens his eyes that are glowing gold) My king (his eyes water) You are back. (Craddles Arthur's face)
So Emrys explains his condition to Arthur and also that 1500 years have passed and there's probably a catastrophy coming their way since Arthur is now back and all. Obviously, it's a lot to process for Arthur and he doesn't take it all well at first, but he calms down and accepts everything eventually. Arthur can't help but notice this version of Merlin,despite crying for him at the beginning, seems void of emotion most of the time.
Emrys does a spell on Arthur so he can speak modern english and tells him he will switch back to being Merlin soon.
Emrys: (serious) You can tell him you were delirious due to almost drowning or that you had some mental affliction. He already believes that anyways.
Arthur: I'm not going to lie to him, Merlin.
Emrys: I'm not Merlin. He IS Merlin and he's not going to believe you are King Arthur.
Arthur: Why can't you stay like this?
Emrys: I'm too dangerous when I'm in control for too long. Merlin is harmless and can actually be your friend.
Arthur: You are my friend!
Emrys: (coldly) No, Arthur. I'm your weapon, your protector at best, but nothing more.
Arthur: I don't believe that!
Merlin: Believe what you want. (Turns his back to Arthur)
Arthur: And I won't lie to him either!
Merlin: Tell him what you want (Eyes glowing, about to switch)
Arthur: Mer-I mean Emrys! (Stops him by holding his arm and Enrys turns to him) When will I see you again?
Emrys: When I'm needed or when you call me. Don't abuse though. Merlin might get suspicious if he has too many mental gaps. (Switchs back to Merlin and faints again)
Arthur: (catches him before he hits the floor) This better not become an habit.
Time goes by. Merlin still believes Arthur is crazy, but at least he speaks english now. Merlin does find strange the Arthur has no document, nor he is register in the sistem apparently. Merlin doesn't have the heart to get this "King Arthur" out of his house though, since he clearly has no where to go so Merlin lets him stay. Not for free of course, he makes Arthur help with the cleaning and stuff and doesn't stand for prat behavior when Arthur acts all kingly.
Arthur gets why Emrys told him this Merlin was his Merlin despite him not having his memories or his magic. He is clumsy, he jokes, he smiles, calls him out when he's being mean, but also is there for him when he needs him. Is the Merlin he knew but more... happy. Without burdens of destiny or traumas of the past.
Meanwhile Emrys just appears when they are investigating or when there is danger coming their way, like a magical creature attack or a car Arthur failed to see when he crossed the street. Emrys never smiles or small talks, he just goes to the point and gets the job done. He is dark, but overall he is... broken.
Arthur heart eaches when he realises... he is the one who took Merlin's light. He was the one who broke him.
And that's all I have for now. I don't know how merthur would get together in this AU. What do you think?
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dresshistorynerd · 1 year ago
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I've seen a post you've reblogged and added to, among many things about women showing nipples. Can you recommend any ref material (articles, videos, etc.) are share your knowledge about this? Cause I'm curious about that, as nowadays going out in a shirt without a bra makes you indecent, while in like 90s it was okayish? I wonder how it was in previous centuries.
There is a really cool academic paper about bare breast dresses in 17th century England specifically. I think anyone can read it by creating a free account.
Abby Cox also has a good video about the cleavage during the past 500 years in which she goes through also the nip slip phenomena.
I don't have other sources that specifically focus on this subject, though many sources about specific decades touch on it, but I do have my primary source image collection, so I can sum up the history of the bare nipple.
So my findings from primary source images (I could be wrong and maybe I just haven't found earlier examples) is that the Venetians were the first ones to show the nipple for courtly fashion. At the same time in other places in Europe they sported the early Elizabethan no-boob style that completely covered and flattened the chest. In the other corners of Italy the necklines were also low but less extreme. Venetian kirtle necklines dropped extremely low as early as 1560s and they combined extremely sheer, basically see-through partlets with their kirtle. First example below is a 1565-70 portrait of a Venetian lady with the nipples just barely covered waiting slip into view with a movement of arm. There was an even more extreme version of this with the kirtle being literally underboob style, still with a sheer doublet. Though I believe this was not quite for the respectable ladies, since I have only seen it depicted on high class courtesans. They were not exactly respectable ladies, but they did have quite good social position. The second example is a 1570s depiction of a courtesan, which is revealed by the horned hairstyle. By the end of the century this underbust style with only see through fabric covering breasts, had become respectable. In the last example it's shown on the wife of the Venetian doge in 1597.
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Around the same time, at the very end of 1500s, the extremely low cut bodice fashion enters rest of Europe. The low cut style was present in the bodices of all classes, but the nipple was really only an aristocrat thing. The lower classes would cover their breasts with a partlet, that was not sheer. Bare breast was ironically from our perspective a show of innocence, youthful beauty and virtue, and to pull off the style with respect, you also had to embody those ideals. Lower class women were considered inherently vulgar and lacking virtue, so a nipple in their case was seen as indecent. Bare boobs were also a sort of status symbol, since the upper class would hire wet nurses to breastfeed their children so they could show of their youthful boobs.
Covering partlets and bodices were still also used in the first decade of 1600s by nobles and the nip slip was mostly reserved for the courtly events. The first image below is an early example of English extremely low neckline that certainly couldn't contain boobs even with a bit of movement from 1597. The 1610s started around 5 decades of fashion that showed the whole boob. The first three were the most extreme. Here's some highlights: The second image is from 1619.
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Here the first, very much showing nipples, from c. 1630. The second from 1632.
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The neckline would slowly and slightly rise during the next decades, but nip slips were still expected. Here's an example from 1649 and then from 1650-55. In 1660s the neckline would get still slightly higher and by 1870s it was in a not very slippable hight. The necklines would stay low for the next century, though mostly not in boob showing territory, but we'll get there. But I will say that covering the neckline in casual context was expected. Boobs were mostly for fancy occasions. It was considered vain to show off your boobs when the occasion didn't call for it and covering up during the day was necessary for a respectable lady. You wouldn't want to have tan in your milk-white skin like a poor, and also they didn't have sun screen so burning was a reasonable concern.
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1720s to 1740s saw necklines that went to the nip slip territory, though they didn't go quite as low as 100 years earlier. The nipple was present in the French courtly fashion especially and rouging your nipples to enhance them was popular. Émilie Du Châtelet (1706-1749), who was an accomplished physicist and made contributions to Newtonian mechanics, was known in the French court to show off her boobies. An icon. Here she is in 1748. Here's another example from this era from 1728.
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The Rococo neckline never got high, but in the middle of the century it was less low till 1770s when it plunged into new lows. In 1770s the fashion reached a saturation point, when everything was the most. This included boobs. The most boob visible. There was a change in the attitudes though. The visible boob was not a scandal, but it was risque, instead of sing of innocent and did cause offense in certain circles. I think it's because of the French revolution values gaining momentum. I talked about this in length in another post, mostly in context of masculinity, but till that point femininity and masculinity had been mostly reserved for the aristocracy. Gender performance was mostly performance of wealth. The revolutionaries constructed new masculinity and femininity, which laid the groundwork for the modern gender, in opposition to the aristocracy and their decadence. The new femininity was decent, moral and motherly, an early version of the Victorian angel of the house. The boob was present in the revolutionary imagery, but in an abstract presentation. I can't say for sure, but I think bare breasts became indecent because it was specifically fashion of the indecent French aristocracy.
Here's example somewhere from the decade and another from 1778. The neckline stayed quite low for the 1780s, but rose to cover the boobs for the 1790s.
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The nipple didn't stay hidden for long but made a quick comeback in the Regency evening fashion. It was somewhat scandalous by this point, and the nipple and sheer fabrics of the Regency fashion gained much scorn and satire. The styles that were in the high danger nip slip territory and those that allowed the nipple to show through fabric, were still quite popular. The sleeves had been mid length for two centuries, but in 1790s they had made a split between evening and day wear. The evening sleeves were tiny, just covering the shoulder. Showing that would have been a little too much. Like a bare boob? A risque choice but fine. A shoulder? Straight to the horny jail. (I'm joking they did have sheer sleeves and sometimes portraits with exposed shoulder.) But long sleeves became the standard part of the day wear. Getting sun was still not acceptable for the same reasonable and unreasonable reasons. Day dresses did also usually have higher necklines or were at least worn with a chemisette to cover the neckline. Fine Indian muslin was a huge trend. It was extremely sheer and used in multiple layers to build up some cover. There were claims that a gust of wind would render the ladies practically naked, though because they were wearing their underclothing including a shift, which certainly wasn't made from the very expensive muslin, I'm guessing this was an exaggeration. Especially though in the first decade, short underboob stays were fairly popular, so combined with a muslin, nipples were seen. Here's an early 1798 example of exactly that. The short stays did disappear eventually, but in 1810s the extremely small bodices did provide nip slip opportunities, as seen in this 1811 fashion plate.
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Victorian moralizing did fully kill the nip slip, though at least they were gender neutral about it. The male nipple was just as offensive to them. In 1890s, when bodybuilding became a big thing, bodybuilder men were arrested for public indecency for not wearing a shirt.
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miryum · 3 months ago
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I had a thought—
So Hogwarts was founded around 990 CE, right? Up to when Harry attended, that gives us about 1000 years that Rowling didn't cover or explore. And that means 1000 year of troubles that I have questions about
1000-1300 CE: Okay, so like, medieval times. Can we talk about the sexism that would be here? How did the professors handle that? The girls would have to wear these horrid clothes and expect to have flying lessons? Or were flying lessons only for the boys? How much of Hogwarts was gender segregated? And the Holy Roman Empire was all the rage. That means ultra-Christianity. What if a kid from upper Scotland came in and worshipped polytheism? What then? Would the other kids have burned them or killed them?
1400 CE: This was when witch burnings/huntings were getting popular. I'm assuming that the kids were safe when they got to Hogwarts, but what about Muggleborns? If a guy dressed in robes came to this peasant's mudhut and said "your daughter's a witch!" you're telling me that those parents wouldn't burn their daughter at the stake? And yes, wizards/witches could easily hide their abilities once they graduated, but what if they had a kid that came out magical? How would you explain that your baby is levitating to the townsfolk? Or what if you married a muggle? Would you have to hide your identity your entire marriage? Would you have to hope your kids weren't magical like you? And what if you're a woman who then marries an awful muggle man and you know you're stronger than him and can kill him extremely easily in his sleep, but you can't because it's 1400 CE?!?!
1500 CE: We're getting to the Renaissance right now, okay? So all these kids are beginning to explore literal magic and you're telling me they didn't mix that with the new inventions of the era? Was Galileo or Michelangelo really a wizard? And if all these inventors/thinkers were wizards, who else? Magic has spanned all of time, apparently, so were the pyramids built with magic? (sorry, that was a small side tangent.) And then the Reformation came along and split everyone into different religions. Were there tensions among Catholic/Lutheran students? What about the teachers? What if a Lutheran fell in love with a Catholic at school? What then?
1600-1700 CE: Now lemme ask about social classes. How big of a problem was that? And I think we all know that this problem spanned much longer than just the two centuries I'm giving it. Imagine if a Dutch aristocrat's daughter was admitted to Hogwarts and "oh, it's just a fancy boarding school?" you tell the parents, "great! she can go" so then she gets there, all dressed to the nines with the ballgowns and big wigs and finds out she has to room with a peasant girl and an artist's daughter. Can you imagine?! And yes, maybe they would've become friends, but realistically, probably not. The daughter would demand her own room, but the headmaster couldn't do that, so what would happen? Would she order her new roommates to help her get dressed each morning? Would she look down her nose at them? Would there be different tables in the Great Hall for the upper class? I'm assuming that the professors would have different viewpoints concerning what their background was, so would the Dutch daughter be aghast when her professor (who used to be a blacksmith's apprentice) takes her down a notch and hits her in front of the whole class? And what would recreational activities be like? Yes, everyone would have the same uniforms during class, but can you imagine a guy walking up to you on a lazy Sunday dressed in his powdered wig and golden coattails with their weirdly high white socks and buckled shoes?
1800 CE: Slavery. We know that had to have been racial segregation, right? And even if Europe was all progressive and abolished slavery starting in the 1400s, some countries definitely still had slavery. And don't even get me started on America and Ilvermorny. Being a Southern belle and then having to take classes and eat in the same room from the same plates as someone that looks like the slaves your father owns? (What about the fucking Civil War?! Confederates and unionists in the same school?!) And I'm sure the same thing happened in Hogwarts! And I didn't even mention the Transatlantic Slave Trade in the 1500-1800s!! How did Hogwarts handle racism? If they just banned all non-whites from the premise, then they lost a large chunk of the next generation of wizards and witches. And those poor boys and girls they banned. Imagine having all these strange phenomenons happen your entire life and have no idea why or trying to hide them because you didn't go to Hogwarts and learned what they were or how to channel them!
1900-2000 CE: Oh my fucking god. Where to begin? The style is drastically different from the 1600s. Now students are coming in with flappers dresses and their hair slicked back and everything and professors are like, "what the fuck?" Did the Yule Ball have different types of dancing? I'm assuming so. Were their more dances because the students loved it? And then the fucking Great Depression hits and now most students can't even buy the necessary textbooks to come to school. Most are needed by their families for work (AND ALSO!!! I didn't mention, but in medieval times, did parents even let their kids go to Hogwarts? They needed them to work the fields or stuff.) Then, growing anti-semitism starts up and some of the students are discriminated against because of their religion, just like back in 1000-1300 CE. The World Wars happen and what if a German kid (who's being indoctrinated and I can go on a whole other rant about children in Germany I swear, don't get me started because I will defend the kids until my last breath) is proudly wearing a swastika just like his daddy and then sees a Jewish kid and starts yelling slurs, just like his dad does? How many kids did Hogwarts save from concentration camps? Did the magical kids beg for the muggle siblings to come and stay at Hogwarts to save them from Auschwitz? Then there were hardly any boys for a generation because they were all off fighting a goddamn war! Things started to chill out for a while until kids came into Hogwarts wearing bell bottoms and tye-die and the girls were burning their bras and were the boys cheering them on or was there serious backlash? How much fucking weed was passed around in the 70s? (This is the marauder era btw.) Did the gay wizards/witches finally feel safe enough about coming out? Or were there too many people against them still? OR, did the homophobic people learn to be more accepting because they had to be? Because they were in the same classes, same dorms, same everything as gays? What about magic birth control? Or, was everyone too worried about Voldemort to burn their bras and come out as gay? How much did Voldemort truly influence the Wizarding World? And then Harry fucking Potter came along, the 90s happened and now, his kids have just graduated! I'm assuming Hogwarts has to have changed with technology, but how much? Do professors think magic is losing the battle to technology or are Muggleborns actually still more fascinated by magic than their phones (I'm assuming if you saw someone change from a human to a cat, that'd be more cool than a TikTok, but who knows?!) Does Hogwarts have WiFi and outlets? Or are kids forbidden from technology? And how did kids from the 80s-90s keep up with technology? Did they all just trapse down to a small town by Hogsmead and have to catch up with all the blockbuster movies there?
In short, I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS
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cpunkwitch · 4 months ago
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Hey let's talk about the punk genre, what punk stands for, what the punk genre really is and what it actually means to be punk
Because so many people are completely misunderstanding the punk subcultures of to-yester-day that people are just simply considering them aesthetics and alternative life styles when it's so much more complicated then that and leads to people spreading misinformation like "cpunk is for ALL disabilities and not exclusive what so ever"
Note: I realize during my talk I mention punk subgenre when really I'm talking about punk subcultures, please keep this in mind while you read! Thank you!
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For starters; the term punk, first used in the late 1500's at the earliest to refer to prostitutes, was popularized in the mid 1900's when in 1971 a rock journalist (Greg Shaw) used the term to describe The Guess Who's music.
What became as a synonym for "hoodlum" or "ruffian" got adopted in the 70's by rock bands like Sex Pistols as a form of rebelling against how "commercial" rock'n'roll music had become in the 60's and to continue the counterculture movements from that previous decade.
Overtime the word and therein punk culture gained the association of rebellion and community built on common ground against a certain thing or towards a common objective (such as being against record labels restricting musicians, wanting accessibility for certain people and fairness for people regardless of class and wealth status etc).
People who would attend the "punk rock" concerts would show up in the work out clothing they had and whatever they could afford at the time, second hand clothing, ripped jeans, worn out leather jackets, and thus earned themselves getting called "punks" or "punk rockers" for their "inappropriate/poor dress" and the controversial bands they would listen to
This carried over to that sort of dress becoming an alternative style commonly worn by those who liked rock and metal bands and this monopolized upon by capitalism (the exact thing punk rockers were against to begin with, as most rock bands at the time were literal garage bands)
And this evolved to the reason elderly would yell at teenagers calling them punks and what the punk genre has become today.
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As for what it means to be punk, it can vary from person to person and subgenre to subgenre, more specifically it varies from person within subgenre to person within another subgenre.
Punk rockers might define being punk as in going against the dress codes and such that restrict you from self expression, allowing people to attend concerts without have to pay ridiculous amounts of money, being anti-capitalist etc
Whereas cpunk or as we call ourselves "cripple" punks (as is what the c in cpunk stands for) it is clearly defined by the coiner of our community who is no longer with us, taking back the slur cripple for ourselves, fighting for accessibility and having a sense of community at all for physically disabled folk. Some have even said the most punk thing we can do is survive the day living authentically in a world that's literally built against us deformed and physically disabled folk.
To be punk can mean plenty of different things but most commonly it's to fight for equality, to be ourselves, to be seen. It's to go against the rules and authority that want you to conform to their ideals, and plenty of other similar beliefs.
Punk folk have always been labeled as such because of how we are treated for how we look, act, what we listen to and believe, and in general for how we stand out.
Punk fashion started as a DIY, punk music was always about anti-authority and anti-capitalist views, punk as a genre has always been about individuality in community and things many corporations hated.
It's always been more complex than just wearing a leather jacket with an edgy patch and spiked or coloured hair while listening to a band with heavy guitar. It will always be more than an aesthetic or life style.
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Why bring this up?
Because these past few years a lot of punk's history have gotten ignored, stepped under the rug and misunderstood.
There's been people forcing themselves into spaces like able bodied people trying to claim to be cpunk when the community isn't for them.
There's been people gatekeeping punk in completely misinformed ways, when to be punk is that you don't fit in a box at all (hence the non conformity)
And there's just been non stop misinformation all together.
Punk is pro-sex workers. Punk is anti conformity. Punk is pro equity. And punk is not for those who harass others and insult them for any reason, regardless of how much you disagree with them.
Regardless of how you define punk, the most important thing is that you listen to voices of others. Don't disregard them like people have done to us all this time.
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Thank you so much for letting me ramble off I hope this post has been helpful!
I also apologize for the lack of ids.
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 11 months ago
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WIBTA for ghosting someone in RP?
This is a very chronically online problem, I'm aware, but I could use Tumblr's input. This is kinda long, so tl;Dr at the end.
So I (ftm), Z (nb), and O (f) (ages unimportant, but we're all adults) have a server for a shared fandom of ours. There are other people on the server too, but they're relatively unimportant to the problem.
One of the major channels to note was an rp channel. Things started off peachy keen! Everyone was having a grand old time! However, little problems started to pop up. O began introducing some ocs to the rp group chat, which, while outlandish for the setting (her ocs were ghosts from 1500's Minecraft Germany or whatever? I'm still not entirely clear since she's bad at continuity). And while I'm not against more out there ocs, the issue was how she used them, constantly trying to solve problems instantly. They felt more like MacGuffin's than characters. But whatever, she's our friend so we didn't really care.
Then, the racism incident happened.
It's a cool name, but sorta makes it sound more important than it was. Basically O had "monster form" at the end of each of her characters names, since apparently they had human forms too. Well, in an argument, a character referred to the group of ocs as monsters (since, how else would you refer to all of em at once?), and in one of her ocs replies they said smth like "oh btw thanks for the racist remark".
IMMEDIATELY in the ooc chat, Z and I both go "hey man, we're not playing the racism game", which... caused O to leave the server temporarily. Fun.
The relevance of the racism incident is to show why we can't just talk to her ooc about the upcoming issues.
((Very offhandedly she also keeps trying to pressure Z specifically into rping? Even though Z has made it clear many times this month that they are busy with the holidays??))
Anyways, time passes and O keeps wanting to tack on useless shit to her characters (both canon and ocs) for literally no reason. From "Bruno esk powers" to "shapeshifting genitals", it just felt like feature creep.
Eventually this comes to a head when she asks if her 32 year old character could be a WWII veteran.
You know. In the text chat based rp where characters use hashtags and emotes and talk about Twitter.
After a small back and forth between Z and O in the ooc chat, Z just kinda, gave up. Part of the reason they made the server was to transfer their previous rp writings to a server they own, so they don't have to worry about it getting deleted. (Before anyone assumes Z is just being strict, trust me. Z had been very accommodating with letting me and O make inputs and have our characters make an impact. This wasn't an issue of O's lack of control, but rather lack of care about the setting.)
Z admitted in a group chat with just me and their partner that they basically are just going to give up on their previous rp, and just let O do whatever she wants.
This really, and I mean REALLY, ticked me off.
Now, I will not start a ruckus about it on the server itself since I know Z hates confrontation, but now I've just settled on to give O the cold shoulder in rp, not replying to her ocs, barely interacting with her canon characters, etc.
I feel like in character I have a valid reason to ignore her (her ocs made one of my ocs upset, and my other characters are upset for him), but I can't tell if this would be too mean?
ALSO quick little note I forgot to mention above, but it's basically just the three of us in the rp chat, so with Z busy for the holidays, I'm the only other person who O would be able to rp with, if that impacts the vote.
TL;DR - Someone in a rp server is being a right ass and we cannot talk to her about it without potentially starting a huge fight, now I want to ignore her in rp. WIBTA
What are these acronyms?
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sweaterkittensahoy · 2 years ago
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Some financial advice that may be actually helpful
Based on one of y'all (sorry, I'm lazy, I'm not scrolling back) mentioning the terrible advice of "Make six figures."
Like, bitch. I'm TRYING.
But, let's say you live in a shocking world where you don't pull six figures out your bosses's ass every year. How can you make small financial changes that can lead to larger financial security?
These are all utterly subjective and based on things I've either actually done or just observed. I'm gonna try to skip over shit like, "shop for clothes second hand!" because shit like that can require a HUGE time commitment, and it's not even always worth it.
Anyway:
If your grocery store has a free rewards program (you put in your phone number or email address), get that set up. Yes, it will track what you purchase. But it also means when you get coupons in the mail, they're for things you actually buy. In our two-person household, we can save anywhere from 0-15 bucks a week depending on how coupons land.
If you can get a grocery card with fuel points (Fred Meyer and Safeway do it here in the PNW), you can save LOADS on gas. A dollar a gallon easily.
Also do any pet store reward programs that might be available. As the Bean does not require a great deal all the time, her rewards build up slowly, but every few months, we get enough points to get ten or twenty bucks off a purchase.
Do NOT buy in bulk if you're not gonna eat in bulk. Five pounds of rice is great if you eat rice regularly, but if you only have it every now and again, smaller portions of boxed rice are likely a better option. The same is true for any dried foods. Yeah, it's shelf stable, but it takes up more of the shelf. That could hold the stuff you actually eat steadily.
Frozen fruits/veggies are as healthy as fresh. And they'll stay ready to eat a lot longer. Consider that with how you eat and how much you eat a certain vegetable. It may be better worth your money to have three bags of frozen broccoli in your freezer than to keep buying fresh broccoli you forget to use in time.
If you're looking at a generic that says "Compare to BRAND NAME." It's the same formula. That's why they can say that. The reason it's cheaper is because the copyright or trademark costs money. Take that off, and boom. Cheaper cost for the same stuff.
If you have a car, know the way you drive it and how that can affect it. For example, if you do a lot of city driving, your transmission and (if applicable) stick shift are gonna wear down faster than you might expect. It's not always mileage. It's starting and stopping. However, if you drive long distances without stopping a lot (rural areas), your higher mileage car may not need any work on those things. Get your oil changed and your tires checked, and know what to look out for in terms of the kind of car you have and the driving you do. For example, we have less than 100k miles on our 15-year-old car, but we've mainly used it for city driving. We had to get the clutch re-built a few years ago, and last year we had to get the transmission goos updated because they'd run dry. These aren't surprising needs for a city-driven stick shift that's over ten years old.
There's a schedule to big shit going on sale in the US. Mattresses are a big thing around Memorial Day for some reason (Support the Fallen Troops by...fucking???). Electronics go big on sale before school starts and on Black Friday. Memorial Day is also big for cars, as is the 4th of July. If you hand make anything, certain colors of stuff go on sale before major holidays. Orange and black before Halloween. Red, green, and white before Christmas. Pastels before Easter. Etc.
Consider how much use a product will get before you decide you can or can't spend a little extra on it. Do 300-count sheets do the job? Yes. But speaking from recent experience, the 1500-count sheets feel so much nicer, which makes sleeping so much nicer, and I use them literally every single night, so the initial investment works out to basically the same even if I'd gotten cheaper sheets.
But also, stuff like sheets and comforters and stuff go on sale at various times! And your bed ain't gonna go through a growth spurt! Keep an eye out for those deals and scoop up the super soft stuff at a discount if you can!
And lastly on this main list, a very very important thing coming from a former poor kid: Fucking treat yourself. You know how much money you have. You know how much money you need. Maybe it's not hard to treat yourself because you're financially solvent, and in that case, this advice isn't for you. It's for those of us who have struggled to deviate at all from our list of NEEDS to give ourself even a very small WANT because WHAT IF I NEED FIVE BUCKS IN TWO DAYS. I get it. I do. To my bones. And I say fucking treat yourself, and if in two days, you suddenly need five bucks, do NOT feel bad that you got yourself a little something. You can't see into the future, and catastrophizing is so bad for you. Trust me. I know. Just. Remember, in all of this, give yourself a little focused care, okay?
All of that being said, a few more general points:
Dish soap is made to break up grease and oil, and it's commonly antibacterial. This makes it fucking perfect for cleaning your shower (covered in your greases and oils) and your bathroom in general (same reason). I don't recommend it for your toilet, but that's a personal preference based on zero research. The point is, most of your bathroom can be cleaned with dish soap. Get all your stuff off your counters. Make a thin layer with the dish soap. Let it sit for five to ten minutes. Scrub. Bonus: You can breathe the whole time.
Vinegar kills germs. Like, lab-tested kills germs. You can clean your kitchen with Vinegar and Borax (odor-reducer), and it costs a fraction of buying the kitchen-branded cleaners.
Borax is also great as an addition to laundry soap for odor-reducing reasons. So, even the cheap laundry soap is more effective with Borax.
"But Gayle, you can make your own laundry soap if you--" Yes, I know. And it's cool you know that. But it takes TIME to make laundry soap, and time is the only thing less reliable than money when it comes down to it.
Look up "No Buying" options in your area. This is usually a Facebook group or maybe a subreddit. The goal is that no one in the group wants to buy or sell anything. They just have stuff they want to get out of their house. It's not a 24/7 goldmine, but it's a once-a-day scroll through that could lead you to a pricey item for free!
If you have stuff that says "handwash," and you think, "Okay, I want to, but that's a whole new task." Nah. Just take a shower and bring it with! Hell, wear it in if you have to. I do this a LOT. Use the water and your soap (which, as it's likely a body wash or soap, will break down those skin oils and such) and give it a good washing while you stand there. Then, squeeze out the excess water and toss that thing over the shower rod. If you have a drying rack, use it. But if you don't, just leave it where it is and leave the fan going. It'll take care of itself. Just double check the label to know if hot water is a bad idea and if you need to lay flat or hang dry. If you need to lay flat, super squeeze the water out and lay it flat wherever you can.
And, lastly for this long post: If you need the expensive shit, buy the expensive shit. I have celiac and MCAS. My bread is five bucks a loaf. Peanut Butter fucks up my histamines. Almond fucks up my histamines. I need five dollar bread and fucking cashew butter to make a fucking sandwich. But the other option is getting sick from putting stuff in my body my body will fight against, and trust me, those urgent care visits stack up.
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gemsofgreece · 5 months ago
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https://x.com/archeohistories/status/1803838446672449797
Αρχίσανε επιτέλους να μιλάνε για αυτά; Καιρός ήτανε.
- REPLY / COMMENTARY TO THE SUBMISSION -
Adding commentary in English because the tweet in the link is also in English. So, I searched a bit about the author, it turns out the study is not even as new as the tweeter account states (yeah I will probably never start calling it x, old habits die hard, let alone that it was a horrible name change to begin with, anyway!). The link refers to a book actually written in 2004 by historian Robert C. Davis,  “Christian Slaves, Muslim Masters: White Slavery in the Mediterranean, the Barbary Coast, and Italy, 1500–1800″. The book is legit and was well received  amongst readers and peer review alike. I had to search all that up in order to be sure what I am posting here, obviously.
Of course, when you’re from any place in the North Mediterranean and have the most basic knowledge of history, you don’t need this book to tell you first that there were massive practices of slavery commited by Asian and African muslims against Southern and Eastern Europeans, ever since the Late Middle Ages, especially and usually through piracy, but not only. It’s a well known fact. I was dumbfounded when I read in the tweet that the previous estimations in the American academic circles were on the tens of thousands. This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. By studying the Modern Greek history alone, literally just early 19th century Greek history - a span of 30 years tops - there were hundreds of thousands of Greeks sold as slaves by the Ottomans. Now calculate this happening in all the north Mediterranean coast - spanning from Greece to Spain - for over 4 centuries. Obviously the reasons or the perpetrators weren’t always the same - it could be Ottomans, Arabs, Barbery pirates, mixed, it could be a market, it could be a war tactic, it could be retaliation, it could be a lot of things. Byzantine and Ottoman Greece was regularly mauled by pirates. In fact, there were also Ottoman Greek pirates, i.e in Mani. My point anyway is that estimating that number to the tens of thousands is ridiculous when that was even too little for a span of 30 years in Greece alone. Then again, I see that this book didn’t examine at all slavery in Greece and the Ottoman Empire. It is more about southwestern Europe. But still the old American estimations seemed - uhm - “diplomatically discreet”. The new book raises the number close to a million in the southwest alone.
I did well to look it up because I read that this book got almost exploited by far right groups who tried to create the rhetoric of an “eye for an eye”, suggesting the West Europeans and Americans were responding with slavery to the Barbery and Ottoman and other muslim slave traders (no, West Europeans and Americans would not go to such lengths for the sake of South Europeans, let’s put it like that, so the whole “white vengeance” argument is beyond stupid, let alone that it remains problematic). I must thus add that: the writer rejected such arguments openly, saying  "Two such enormous wrongs don’t make anything right.“
This is what I hate the most. People end up behaving the exact same way. Abusing history and the objectivity with which it must always be studied in order to serve their political rhetorics and ideologies. We will never learn from past mistakes, it seems as if we are incapable of doing it. You will NEVER see the topics of European / White / Christian people getting sold in multiple hundreds of thousands as slaves by non-Christian - POC (as Americans like to call them) being big in America. Or at least ackowledged and examined beyond academic circles. But this is exactly also what the far right groups attempted; to minimize the horrific, well studied Atlantic slave trade or “excuse” it! The level of bias and all these groups accusing each other of the very things they themselves commit…!
At some point, in one of my posts about Ottoman Greek history where I added some of the living conditions for a Christian far from the cosmopolitan areas of the Ottoman Empire (AKA lowkey almost any place besides Constantinople) - historically fact checked - at some point I got an impressively vile reply from a self-identifying “activist” who cursed at me and long story short they said I was a despicable liar. Of course, by “activist” we mean a muslim person who said their family history was affected by the western colonization, which I respect, but they could not equally respect that people of the same faith as them (not even the same nation!) could be capable of vile acts as well and their activism was limited only to people who had the exact same experience as they did. Everyone else was a despicable liar.  Anyway, needless to say, I wasn’t lying.
And before someone says “oH YoU taLK abOUt BIas buT ALExandER-”. Of course. We have said this a thousand times over. Ancient Greece practiced slavery, not even just to foreigners or POC but also Greeks enslaving other Greeks, like, top THAT. But so did the Sumerians, the Hebrews, the Hittites, the Babylonians, the Egyptians, the Romans and the Persians at least after the Achaemenid dynasty. You know?
But this is exactly the point and this is ultimately the reason I am personally publishing and commenting to this submission; to make a point that who is an oppressor, a slave trader, a wrongdoer of any sort has NOTHING to do with skin, religion, geography and I can’t believe there are people living in 2024 in advanced societies truly believing this. It is not some genetical trait of white people to be slave traders. The only thing it takes is power imbalance and a little touch of convenient propaganda for any human to commit and normalize the most horrendous deed. If they are morally weak, of course, which is also not a genetical trait and unfortunately it is not rare at all, anywhere in the world.
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moony-2001 · 1 year ago
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How I would’ve constructed the 10 year time skip
✨Brought to you by my deep loathing for Lore Olympus✨
•warnings: super long post (I’m not joking), death, kidnapping, violence•
What The Fuck Happened
There was so much potential for the punishment arc. We could’ve seen a lot of character development, fleshed out storylines, reconciliation between certain people. We could’ve seen both Hades and Persephone going to therapy instead of claiming that one therapy session has fixed all their problems and then never going again.
Instead we got horny Persephone, pretty much no clue about what happened to Demeter OR Persephone during that time, and an easy plot device (sorry Cerberus) for Persephone to be like “I’m a big girl now harrumph harrumph, time for me to go reunite with my crusty ass bf who I’ve only know for a month”.
I hate the way she reunited with Ares. Ares is just a bonafide creep throughout the whole comic (although I liked when he attacked Zeus lol). I guess what I mostly hate about Ares and Persephone’s interaction is, yet again, it’s another example of every guy in the comic going AWOOGA over Persephone. Also Athena’s design is so fugly. I guess Rachel is completely incapable of drawing masculine presenting women as actual women.
The whole Kronos plot line is stupid. I hate it so much. Imo the whole “the titans are trying to escape so they can rule Olympus again” is overdone and not particularly done well. The fight between Kronos and Persephone is lame as shit. Like what, she gets big for all of 20 minutes, burps out a bunch of bees (which aren’t even aggressive creatures), and then does her version of the Wuxi Finger Hold from Kung Fu Panda and has Tartarus spirit Kronos away, magically fixing all of their problems (except it doesn’t and nothing is actually fixed).
Also I might get a lot of flack for this, but I don’t think the addition of Morpheus’ character was necessary. I like Morpheus. I think she’s cute. But she’s a) slowly turning into another version of Hecate and b) not really vital to the narrative imo. We already have so many other characters and plot lines that take away from the central “romance” the story is SUPPOSED to be focused on. I just don’t think we need ANOTHER character whose arc is probably not going to go anywhere.
So yeah, overall very L writing, L plot, and L characters.
What I would do differently
The first thing I would change is that the whole punishment arc would be an entire season unto itself. You’ll see why it has to be a separate season.
The second thing is (and this literally pains me to say) in order for me to rewrite this portion of LO without rewriting the entire comic, I kinda sorta have to throw the entire timeline of Greece out the window. If I try to follow a timeline based on the history of Greece, the entire timeline of LO has to shift massively. I’m already getting a migraine trying to think about how I could possibly make it work.
I do know this: Instead of 10 years I’d do somewhere between 1,000-3,000 years. 10 years is a joke. When you’re a god, 10 years is a trip to the time out corner
For now, let’s just say (assuming LO takes place in the Ancient Greece era) and Ancient Greece spanned ~1500 years, Persephone’s punishment would’ve needed to have been established near the very end of the collapse of the Late Bronze Age, spanned the entirety of Ancient Greece as we know it today, and ended some time in the very early Byzantine era. So like what, 1500-2000 years? Fine. I can work with this.
The Famine
You know how the first 400 years of Ancient Greece was deemed the “Dark Ages” and it was a time of war, famine, and loss? I want to start the punishment there. It would make sense for what we know about the characters thus far:
Demeter has had complete control over the growth of the flora and fauna on earth. She’s the goddess of the harvest after all. But we also find out that while Persephone has been in Olympus, Demeter has also been carrying out her duties as the goddess of spring. Plus Demeter has been around for forever and a day. She knows what she’s doing
Persephone doesn’t (at this point in the comic) really have control over her powers. Even in her fits of rage, she ends up doing more harm than good (i.e. her act of wrath, turning Minthe into a plant, etc.). In comparison with everyone around her, she is a literal infant. I mean shit, she’s only been alive for 20 years compared to the fact that everyone else has most likely been around for a minimum of 500 years.
If Demeter is stripped of her status as a goddess (and thus her powers) it would make sense that there would be a lot of death and famine and war over territory/food. Persephone would be left with nothing: no guidebook, no how-to. Of course a lot of people would die while she’s trying to figure her shit out. It could also be a very interesting tactic for psychological warfare on Zeus’ part. Zeus KNOWS Persephone doesn’t know what she’s doing. He knows people will die. And he knows that since life is precious to Persephone (or at least that’s what she claims), it would punish her further.
We can see episodes of Persephone struggling to provide for humanity. We could have real world examples of the affect of famine and depopulation. We would see her struggling with her powers, her mental health. We could get an episode that explains how her hands got destroyed from trying to mimic her mother’s powers. We can see what the fuck happened to Demeter in Attica.
Now obviously things will eventually go on the up and up for Persephone and her compatriots. The whole 1500-2000 years isn’t just going to be one big clusterfuck. As time progresses and chapters pass, we could see real character growth for Persephone not just mentally, but in almost every aspect. Since she will have been alive at that point for over 1000 years, the readers would be able to see her newfound maturity. We could also see her build strong female support systems and strengthen her friendships, something we NEVER saw in the OG comic (or at least they never happened without Hades somehow being involved). You get the point.
What’s Old Man Hades up to?
I have big plans for Hades and none of them involve him going into a 1000+ year coma or getting possessed by his creepy-ass dad. He is an asshole though. I kinda wanted to portray him in this the way he is in the original myths (which for those who don’t know or haven’t read it, it’s not good).
So in Greek mythology, Hades actually had a wife before he even met Persephone or Minthe. Can you take a wild guess as to who?
Bingo! It’s Leuce. Contrary to popular belief, Leuce is actually NOT a home-wrecking POC version of Persephone (don’t @ me we all know the nymphs represent the lower class and POC). In mythology, Leuce was Hades’ first wife/lover and she died sometime long ago and I believe was turned into a white poplar tree. No she is not a cousin of Thetis and Amphitrite. She is not even remotely related to them. And Thetis and Amphitrite are sisters, not cousins. Do your fucking research Rachel.
Unfortunately, Greek Mythology doesn’t really mention all that much about Leuce outside of the fact that she was a daughter of Oceanus, she was kidnapped by Hades, and when she died (for unspecified reasons) she turned into a tree. Which means I’m going to be taking a lot of creative liberties for this portion of the post. Sorry to all you diehard fans of Greek myths out there. I shall try to do her justice.
In my head-cannon Hades and Leuce had been in an arranged marriage for thousands of years. Leuce was offered by Oceanus as a peace offering after the War and Hades, not really having any other viable options for a wife, agreed to take her to the underworld (much to her dismay). Over time, they grew to have a mutually loving/caring relationship. Unlike LO Persephone, Leuce was a good queen and she worked hard to make sure the denizens of the underworld respected her and that they were well cared for. Unfortunately, they got divorced because Hades starting having an affair with Minthe. Even though she loved her kingdom and the people of the underworld, she divorced Hades because she couldn’t stand to be around him, which, y’know. Fair.
A few notes: in my head-cannon, Leuce is still around leading up the the trial and punishment. Her portrait would still be up, we would see signs that Hades and Leuce still interact (more in terms of business, not romance), etc.
Also, unlike Persephone, Leuce would not take her anger out on Minthe or turn her into a plant or destroy her apartment. She would simply wish her good luck. She would be mad at Hades for cheating and for taking advantage of Minthe while she’s at her lowest. But I’m going to be straight up: even though Leuce is meant to be the better Persephone, she still has her flaws. She’s not going to feel inclined to help Minthe in any way. Would you want to help out the person who your partner is cheating on you with? The answer is no and if you say yes, you’re lying.
Anyways, during the Punishment, Hades and Leuce reconnect and Hades finds out Leuce is dying. He tries to convince her to leave the underworld and return to her father, but she insists that she is going to stay, even if it means she dies away from everyone she loved. She won’t abandon her kingdom, her people, or her ex-husband (although that’s much better than he deserves). They move in together and Hades begins to take care of her, even as she begins to deteriorate. They also begin to rekindle their past relationship and (with the help of a therapist) work through some of their past problems together.
Note: their relationship rekindles a couple hundred years into the punishment so by the time the punishment ends, they’ve been back together for a minimum of 1200 years
The aftermath and the Rape of Persephone
Before any of you go gaga over me for the title used above, the original title used for the myth is The Rape of Persephone (or if you want to be really original, The Rape of Proserpina). In the context of the title, the term “rape” means to be taken/kidnapped rather than having sexual violence inflicted upon you. Rape stemmed from the traditional Latin word “raptus” which means “to be seized” or “carried off”. Okay? Okay.
So after the Punishment ends and Persephone feels like she has thoroughly improved herself, she goes to find Hades and talk with him about their relationship. Mainly that she feels they rushed into it, and even though she does like him she wants to take things really slow (kind of like how she wanted before getting married 3 episodes later).
Upon arriving to the underworld/Hades house, her worst fears are realized: not only has Hades (seemingly) moved on, he has found someone else. Or rather, he got back together with his ex-wife.
Persephone freaks out (“who is she?”/“I’m his wife!”)
Persephone, throughly upset for getting her hopes up, flees back to mortal realm. Hades goes to leave Leuce, but not before she tells him that if he leaves her for Persephone, she will never forgive him. Hades leaves anyways, much to the absolute despair of Leuce, who is left wailing as he runs off.
Persephone returns home and finds Demeter and they hug. Demeter is initially horrified to see what happened to her hands, but is proud of the work she did during the punishment. Persephone cries to her mother about Hades, and Demeter tries to comfort her but it inadvertently comes off more as “I told you so” rather than “I’m sorry you had to experience that” (although Demeter is sorry that Persephone’s heart is broken). Persephone, already feeling incredibly emotionally distressed, lashes out at Demeter and they start to argue. This is when Hades arrives.
Hades sees Demeter and Persephone arguing and inserts himself into the situation. Persephone becomes more upset after seeing him and Hades (assuming that Persephone is upset about the fact that Demeter is getting in the way of their “relationship” and not the fact that Persephone discovered Hades went back to his ex-wife after saying he loved her) whips out the the “one personal question, no exceptions” card and proposes to Persephone. He insists that he loves her and only her and that they should spend the rest of their immortal lives together.
Persephone says no.
Hades, not taking no for an answer and not wanting to leave the mortal realm empty handed, kidnaps Persephone, much to the dismay of Demeter, Artemis, and the nymphs. Hades returns with a traumatized Persephone to the underworld to find that Leuce has died and turned into a white poplar tree. While Persephone is sobbing on the floor, Hades weaves a mock crown from the branches and leaves of the tree, places it upon Persephone’s head, and tells her she better get used to their life together.
Thus ends the season and the punishment arc.
Afterthoughts
Thank you for sitting through my ramblings. I officially joined the anti-LO community about the time the trial happened and had been wanting to make a post like this for a reaaaaally long time. Besides the fact that the trial in of itself was completely unethical (@genericpuff made a whole post about that) the punishment arc just really pissed me off. Like go girl, give us nothing!
Anyways, I may or may not do a whole timeline reconstruction of LO depending on how much I feel like offing my sanity with the amount of research that would have to go into that. Until then, I hope you like this post and look out for other anti LO posts coming your way :)
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jupiter--dream · 5 months ago
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Okay, okay, headcanon time, hear me out (a headcanon that I didn't need to explain so thoroughly but here I am)
So Dream and Nightmare are from Spain, right? (if we follow the "characters have their creator's nationality" headcanon) so they'd be from Spain, specifically Almería (very much south Spain)
So logically we all agree they'd speak Spanish, but at the same time they didn't live there NOW, but 500 years ago! So roughly the start of the 1500s, and like a couple decades before that around that zone there was still a lot of arab territory since we'd been Al-Andalus for like 700 years up til that point.
So my personal headcanon is that since back then they'd speak a very ancient precursor of Spanish, Nightmare being alive after that and needing to go around getting info and negativity means that he could hear and see every little change to the language until it became modern day Spanish, and that's also how he might've learnt English. For Dream I like to believe that his time being with Lanny after being freed from the stone (since Lanny would've also ended up knowing modern day Spanish) is what taught him the language.
But for Nightmare, he reads a lot and if he "kept in touch" with Spanish there's no reason for me to believe he didn't do the same for Arabic
And with all of that, he might know Arabic and he might speak it with Killer from time to time idk, they'd still speak different dialects of it bc of where they're from but it's the same as with Cross in Spanish, they'd understand each other ajfjnwnnf
Sorry this is literally so random but lately I've just been thinking a lot about the specific time the twins lived in and it's real-world equivalent ajfbannfn
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phoenix · 17 days ago
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Wanna help cheer up a disabled trans woman in these dark days?
I am gonna need a new computer by next October. It looks like I can pull off my usual bills and such over the winter, but this one thing is just so far out of my reach by that time.
I'm asking for 1500 dollars and if you can help out here's the link to my Kofi page. And I know that's a lot, so let me explain...
One can argue how much of a "need" a new computer is, and I get it. But as I said, I'm disabled, and my computer is literally my lifeline. I spend genuinely 75% of my waking hours on it. It is where I do my work, it is how I connect to people, it is how I get groceries, it's how I unwind and entertain myself. To me, a computer is an essential part of my life. Some of that can be done from a tablet, sure, but let's just say that is far from an optimal method.
So why do I need a new one? Well...Microsoft is ending support for Windows 10 next October, and while my computer is actually in good shape, it's NOT capable of upgrading to Windows 11. And once support ends, running a Win10 computer on the open internet becomes increasingly risky without security patches. And all the upgrades needed at this point, it really does reach the "might as well get a new one".
Why don't I switch to Linux? Well, quite frankly, I (mostly) like Windows, despite their flaws, and yes I am aware with the issues with 11. A lot of the stuff I do still requires Windows, in at least a way I am comfortable doing. I don't really want to learn a whole new operating system, and the hurdles one encounters with running Linux.
And yes, there ARE ways to loophole around upgrading to Windows 11, but that has it's own series of challenges, and could mess up my computer, so it's not exactly an option I want to risk.
Also, I know, whoa, that sure is a lotta money, can't you get a basic computer for much less? Yes, but again, this is where I do almost everything from. While a lot of that is just web surfing and writing, that's not the end of it. I need a computer that can handle more intense usage, for the few times I use editing software. Also, I do occasionally game on it, so having something that can handle that a well, is needed. With the amount of time I spend on it, I want it to be as solid and comfortable to use as possible.
This is also why I'm not looking for a secondhand computer either. I don't want to "inherit someone else's problems" as they say, and since my issues are in using an older computer that runs perfectly fine otherwise, getting an older used computer seems like not the solution I need.
This is also an investment. If I get a good modern computer, it will literally keep me going for 10 or so years, just like the one I am using right now, and the one before it.
I know the sort of computer I'm looking for, I know about the range it costs, and they tend to run around 1300. I'm asking for a bit more just to cover any fees Kofi might take, and any shipping charges and whatnot I run into.
If you can give, great, it is appreciated, but if all you can do is spread the word, that's also great. I've got a year, so a slow trickle of support won't be a bad thing, and can spread things around to a lot of people over a lot of time. Even just getting to 1000, I might be able to fill the gap, but am asking for the whole goal just in case things go wrong.
Without a computer, it will become increasingly difficult for me to do much of anything or even be online. It is literally my connection to the world.
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dresshistorynerd · 9 months ago
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Ranking Men's Costumes in Period Dramas - Part II: The Good
Part I: The Bad
This is the second part to my ranking of men's costumes in Renaissance period dramas. I selected 10 shows and films which I think have great costuming for the female characters and ranked them according to their costumes for male characters. I have noticed that even when women's costuming is great, men's costuming might be absolutely dog shit. And that's very much what we saw in the first part, where I ranked the five worst entries. For some reason shows and movies are afraid to put men, especially the characters who are supposed to be cool, manly and hot, into historical costumes. And I'm not even asking for historical accuracy, I just don't want my male characters living in the actual 1500s in basically modern leather jackets and pants. Like I don't watch period dramas for vaguely historically inspired modern fashion, I watch it for the historical setting, which costumes help create. This time we will be looking some rare gems that actually imo have really good costuming even for the male characters. For the five best entries, we'll go from worst to best.
5. Eizabeth R (1971)
Elizabeth R is incredibly committed to historical accuracy in it's outfits, especially for queen Elizabeth herself, many of her costumes being directly recreated from her portraits. It covers the whole reign of Elizabeth, so this commitment is especially admirable as the timeline is more than 40 years, including a stark shift in fashion from less structured and more toned down Tudor fashion to the extremes of the highly structured Elizabethan fashion. It's not perfect, The hair is not always great and like many others they fail at French hoods, though they are not upward pointing or pseudo crowns detached from the hood, so could be much worse.
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The men's costumes are also very good. They are faithful to history, they wear stockings, very short trunk hose, ruffs and even have some structuring in their doublets and jerkins. However, the reason this is not higher is that the men's costumes especially, but also many other costumes beside Elizabeth's are looking a little sloppy. There's some structure yes, but the men's silhouettes are just not bold enough and they end up looking a little costumy. Even the codpieces are shrunk so small I'm not even sure if they are there half the time. Cowardice. Here's two Robert Dudley's costumes and an actual portrait of him. I think the second costume is probably an attempt at recreation of that portrait, but it's just kinda halfway there.
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4. Taming of the Shrew (1967)
This film is set in Renaissance Italy, the women's costumes fit well to 1520s-30s. They are honestly really great and cohesive. My only gripe is that their bodices have a very 1960s shape and the make-up is a little distractingly modern. But the costuming is not attempting to recreate historical accuracy, rather they took the historical silhouette and basic elements and crafted a very over the top but cohesive look. I honestly love these very much.
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An interesting choice is made with the men's costuming, especially the main male lead, whose costume is based much more on the Renaissance German men's fashion of that period. His costumes resemble the over the top fashion of the German Landsknecht (first image below). In Italy (second image below) the doublets were also very voluminous and quite colourful but not to that extent as by the Landsknecht and literally no one, not even the other Germans, rocked that slashed style as hard.
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This is not really criticism though. In fact I respect that choice a lot. His costumes are certainly not historically accurate, but they do fit the bombastic aesthetics of the overall costuming, they are loud, large and not afraid to fuck around. This man oozes sex-appeal much more than any character with some modern plain black pants and leather jacket. This is how you costume a Renaissance man who fucks.
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3. Tulip Fever (2017)
I am stretching the definition or Renaissance here a bit, I admit. This movie is set during the 1630s tulip mania, by which point the remnants of Renaissance fashion had already been left to the previous decade. However, I do think most of the movies and TV set in Baroque era also struggle with the men's costumes. Though not as much, because black was fashionable for everyone, the cod piece was gone, trunk hose were replaced by more palatable Venetian hose, fashion was much more stripped down from embellishments, leather was not uncommon in jerkins and appeared even in doublets and hose and the Hollywood's beloved boots became actual fashion items. The men's silhouette in this period is very silly in my opinion and people seem to agree because it's usually skipped in costuming, but overall the period seems to fit modern masculinity standards much more easily than Renaissance era.
But I just really wanted to include this because the costuming is absolutely stunning (and let's be honest we are a bit desperate here trying to find 5 actually good examples). I have not watched the movie and probably never will because the post production was an absolute mess and it apparently came out as just a very bad movie, which is a shame, since the costumes are so good. The ruffs are perfectly crispy. The buttons are dense and look just right. The shoes, both boots and otherwise are so on point. The fabrics are honestly perfect. The silhouettes are just as goofy as they are supposed to be. And the women too have perfect silhouettes. All the details are just simply perfect. You rarely find costuming this meticulously created with historical details and great construction.
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Honestly these top three could all be the best one. This final order was decided purely on which costumes I like more. And while I love the women's fashion of this period, I think the men's fashion is kinda stupid and boring, so I don't like these costumes on aesthetic level as much as the top two.
2. Romeo and Juliet (1968)
This movie is a perfect counterpart to the movie with the worst men's costuming which I talked about in the first post, Rosaline. They are both set in Italy around very end of 15th century and retell Romeo and Juliet. Both have very good costuming for female characters but obviously I think differ greatly in the male character costuming department. Romeo and Juliet costuming takes some artistic liberties to create a heightened reality quite similar to Taming of the Shrew costuming, but follows history much more closely. The colors are bright, the hose are tight, the giorneas are voluminous, the sleeves are long and massive and the cod pieces are prominent. Even the hair is perfect, even for women, they even use hairnets. I imagine the men's hair was quite easy to get right as hairstyles in 60s and 70s were basically lifted directly from 1400s Italian men's hairstyles. The men are even wearing appropriate goofy hats??? Amazing.
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The costuming perfectly captures the era, but they still clearly had fun with it too. Honestly even though I appreciate the meticulously recreated historically accurate costuming, like in Tulip Fever, I tend to like more costuming that does take some artistic liberties to create a distinct look and atmosphere for the movie or TV show. There's some small things they don't get quite right, like having standard lacing instead of ladder lacing, metal eyelets (which would become a thing as late as in 1830s) and most egregiously Juliet in one scene has this very dumb supportive undergarment without even shift under it (first picture below)?? The outer garments were supportive during this era, there was no such thing as supportive undergarment which was any different from the outer kirtle (or gamurra in Italy). Shift was the only truly undergarment. But I will forgive these errors because the costuming is overall so fun and gorgeous. And they did get some details so so right, like look at Romeo's arming doublet (second picture below)! It has Lombardian sleeves!! This was a very specific style of arming doublet for this era and place. However those errors does prevent it from taking the first place. Which leads us to...
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1. Orlando (1992)
This movie has Tilda Swinton in flamboyant Elizabethan men's clothing. That's all.
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Okay, I that is all that needs to be said, but I will say more. This movie spans centuries and shows excellent costumes from several different periods, but I will focus on the Elizabethan costumes only for the sake of this post. The costuming is not super historically accurate in all the detailing, and clearly not trying to be, but it is always impeccable. Even while it takes artistic liberties and the story has an immortality fantastical element it still captures the men's fashion's silhouette much better than any other movie or TV show I know of set in this period. It does that better than the "we recreated these portraits" Elizabeth R. But what really makes this the best in my humble opinion, is that the movie is not afraid of the effeminate and emasculated modern perception of Renaissance men's fashion, no, it leans into it and uses it to explore the themes. The whole story is very much about gender and gender fuckery. Tilda Swinton plays the titular Orlando who is a cis man in Elizabethan era, becomes inexplicably immortal and later inexplicably turns into a woman for the rest of their several centuries. He is the embodiment of "I'm not sure if they are a butch or a twink" and as a bisexual I can only be grateful. But in all seriousness I think the costuming and the casting (queen Elizabeth is also played by a male actor) are so perfectly utilized to highlight the arbitrary construction of gender without needing to say it explicitly.
Conclusion
I have some closing thoughts. I took on this task as a way to show a point, which is that for some reason in Renaissance shows and film especially men's costuming is piss-poor, even when women's costuming is great. Male characters tend to have very bad costuming in Medieval media too, though this is also an issue for female characters. I don't think I have ever seen a Medieval show or movie with truly excellent costuming for anyone. In Renaissance media the issue is clearly not lack of skill or knowledge, they choose to do so. My thesis was that the producers think that the Renaissance men's fashion is too effeminate and too unsexy for the Hot Very Heterosexual Male Lead, who the mostly female audience are supposed fawn over like the female characters do. After the analysis think my hypothesis holds up.
Though there's an interesting trend I only noticed while doing this ranking; every entry (except the least bad) in the worst five list are from 21th century, and every entry (except Tulip Fever which is a little bit cheating anyway) in this best five list are from 20th century. I have some theories on why it turned out this way. First is that the studios have become increasingly more concerned with growing profits so they don't take risks and they put pressure on movies and TV shows to be as broadly appealing as possible. This means they can't just make period dramas for the core audience of period dramas, aka mostly women who are history nerds, so they pander to the modern sensibilities in costuming and not to the people who love to see actual historical costuming. Secondly, I think this might also tie to the broader conservative backlash against loosening of gender roles and broader queer acceptance. Among the core audiences of period dramas there are two distinct groups, queer nerds and conservative women, who don't want politics in their media, which is why they love historical stories because obviously queerness wasn't invented yet and people of colour didn't exist yet (they were and did). (They are ofc not always this extreme, but you get the point.) As men wearing dresses has become a culture war issue, I think the studio executives are afraid that anything not masculine enough in modern standards might alienate the more conservative audiences, and more broadly those who don't want to feel like they are engaging with modern political culture war topics in their escapist media. Even if they knew about the queer nerds, they wouldn't care about them and assume they will go along with it anyway. After all not challenging modern gender roles is not seen as an active choice, it's the default.
This bears repeating: cowards.
As a thank you for reading all the way to the end I will leave you with the image of Tilda Swinton in mid 1600s men's clothing. You are welcome.
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Part I: The Bad
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yukina-otome · 1 year ago
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Chevalier Romantic route rantings
Warning: This post contains spoilers about Chevalier Michel's route. More specifically his Romantic ending.
Sooooo, it is extremly rare for me to criticise Cheva's content. After all, as his absolute stan, i love everything this man does.
BUT i admit that I am not a fan of his romantic ending.
The reason is simple. But first of all a little summary of the events, for does who do not remember or for does who have not played the route but dont mind spoilers.
MC is with everyone at the battlefield. The campement where she is, is attacked and this is when the two ending branches.
In this I will only discuss the romantic one.
So, in the romantic ending, MC gets stabbed by a poisoned knife by the anti war faction and obsidian. They use her as a hostage and says 'if you want the antidote you gotta hand her off'. But Genius Cheva figures out the poison and have the antidote made badabim badaboum.
(Honestly I would have prefered it here if Clavis was the one who found the antidote, and Cheva being impressed by his brother's abilities, after all Clavis was the one who has been studying poisons. But this is not what this post is about so let's no dwell on that)
So MC is cured, Cheva goes to beat the anti war faction with his FIST, because MC says no Stabby stabby. And he somehow makes Obsidian sign a peace treaty and VOILA, war is over.
(Yes, the political plot of this game is extremely stupid, DO NOT start me on that, or this post will never end)
Soooo, MC and Cheva goes back to the castle, where MC is healing. Chevalier stays by her side most of the time as they spend quality time together. And before they know it, there only very few days left before MC has to choose a king, leave the castle and never see cheva again.
So MC asks Chevalier for one last favor, she wants him to dance with her. He accepts and they head to the ballroom where they have a very impactfull moment where MC tells him she is gonna choose HIM as a king and she tells him her reasons which leaves him speechless and i would say touched.
After that there dance ends, and MC start acting like Booboo the clown as she starts rambling, she tells cheva they should have a meal together sometimes before she leaves and turn away from him to hide her tears.
As of now, everything is fine. I have no objections to this developpement. But this is where it ticks me off.
Cheva hug MC from behind and literally ask her TO SLEEP WITH HIM!
Yes yes, he says dinner but he says he is famished and his hand touch mc's body subjectivly.
MC might be as dense as the mariana trench but she's not stupid and she agrees to the hanky panky.
And BIM BADABOUM they smash, in the trill of the action, mc asks him if he will remember her and he says NO which is obviously a lie. And that's literally it. They separate for a year and you guys know the rest.
Now you might ask, what do you not like about this, Yuki?
And i would say many things:
First, HOW DARE HE ASKS HER FOR HER FIRST TIME JUST LIKE THAT, MY CHEVA WOULD NEVER WTF. Remember everyone, this is not 21st century, it's literally around 1500 and around then a woman virginity was EVERYTHING to her. I was like well maybe the ikepri author created the ikepri universe differently and its not a big deal but silvio's romantic ending proved otherwise. I'm not gonna go into the details, i'll just say a woman first time is IMPORTANT. And Cheva most likely knew that. He would never ask her for it in such a way. Specially knowing he could not be her lover. It was one night only between them.
Also it is very irrational and the way cheva asked for it seemed calculated which i hate. I mean, there are no contraception during that era. Surely both knew what could happen after that night.
Then there is how that first time was written. It was only a few sentences and during the whole act MC was crying and all while Cheva was all smug saying 'You like that, don't you?'. I would have liked it if he showed some vulnerability in that moment. And don't tell me 'This is cheva we are talking about, he is not capable of doing that', he actually did in the dramatic ending.
This was supposed to be such an angsty dramatic scene, if only they gave it more attention it would have gave his route more dept and made the ending all the more satisfying.
THIS is how I think things should have happened:
-After the dance, MC still acts the same and says they should have a meal together.
-Chevalier agrees and says then let's have dinner together.
-MC accepts and they have dinner in his room. MC is nervous since this is her first time alone with him in her room since he knows of her feelings and it makes her hyperaware of him. Specially that whenever she look up at him she sees he is already staring at her. Like he wants to commit her to his memory.
-Cheva sees that and starts talking about a new book to calm her down.It works and soon enough they are sitting together on his bed and reading the book together in silence.
-Chevalier's reading speed is higher than hers and whenever he is done he just stares at her as he waits for her to finish the page.
-MC finish a page and look up toward Chevalier to see if he's done with it, but when she does he is already looking at her and there eyes meet.
-They stare at each others soul for a very long time in silence before they kiss, none of them knowing who made the first move.
-The kiss soon turn into a full makeout session on Chevalier's bed and the book fall to the floor in a tud.
-This bring Chevalier to his senses, it is not like him to act so irrationnaly.
-He pulls away from MC, but she pulls him back and that was all he needed for his logical facade to snap.
-They make love and as MC cry her heart out she sees that Cheva's usual ice cold expression is nowhere to be seen.
-His walls are completely gone and at that moment she has the REAL Chevalier in front of her.
She says she loves him but he does not answer her back. He knows that if he says it, it's gonna make even more difficult for her, so he just hugs her to him instead.
And that's how it ends.
What do you guys think? I'm really interested in you guys's opinion on this topic.
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Hold Still ~ X.T.
A/n: Gender neutral pronouns were used, so gn reader for this one! Pure fluff after the last angsty fic <3
Request: “Xavier x werewolf!reader where R gets into a fight with another student that Xavier pulls them out of and helps patch them up. R is still drunk on adrenaline(or like mildly concussed lmao), and they keep being annoying trying to steal kisses from him while he’s literally trying to help stop their face from bleeding.”
Word Count: 1500+
MASTERLIST
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Xavier had gotten there too late to see how it had started, but it was quickly quite clear how it was ending. Y/n wasn’t shifted at all, only their eyes glowing as they went to town on the person underneath them. Xavier had only managed to slip through the crowd and hook his hands under his partner’s arms, hefting them up and away. They had fought, and though Xavier was taller they were stronger and they almost got away. If him not groaning as their foot came in contact with the sude of his leg and them recognizing his voice, they probably would have gotten away clean.
Distracted by Xavier though, their focus changed quickly as they turned from the guy that Xavier didn’t even recognize - except that they weren’t from Nevermore. Which made no sense because they were at school. The town people never came here on their own.
He focused on his partner as their hands ran over his shoulders and down his arms, eyes scanning for injury.
Despite himself, Xavier smiled. “I’m okay.” Of course they had the time and energy to be worried about him when they had a forming black eye, split lip and bloody nose.
Xavier was a little proud to say the other guy looked worse though. Y/n had handled him well.
Not that he should he encouraging that.
Weems was on the scene in the next breath, leaving no room for further discussion. Her eyes ran over something before her worry turned cold and hard as her eyes landed on the boy still on the ground. No one had even tried to help him up, which confused Xavier even more.
Then he saw it.
When Xavier’s art in town had been painted over last year, Weems had given him permission to do something at the school. He had put all of the effort he had into this one, absolutely sure that it would be safe inside the school at the very least.
The wall he’d had his second painting was white, the paint only on enough to cover what he had worked so hard on, underneath. Over the white was splattered, “Monster” in big blocky red letters. At the bottom of the scene on the wall was an open and prepped bear trap.
Xavier felt himself go pale.
The trap was a message of course, the boy probably hadn’t meant to actually catch Xavier or anyone else. But it would have been easy not to see it if you were lost in a book or practicing some practical magic or in regular school stuff - even if you were in a hurry on the way to class. There was a corner that someone could turn around and completely not see the trap at all.
This kid had not only ruined Xavier’s portrait, he had put every single person at Nevermore in very real danger.
No wonder Y/n had gone for the throat.
Weems leered at the boy at her full height and the boy on the ground shrunk into himself. “You won’t press charges, or spread word on what happened here. If you try to I will expose the instigating actions and very illegal trespassing and assault you’ve done. Don’t even get me started on the physical safety threat you’ve made.” It wasn’t totally accurate, but it would he only too easy to play off if anyone tried anything.
Weems had grown a backbone. That was nice to see.
The boy nodded and, once dismissed by Weems, scrambled to freedom. She then turned to Y/n. She didn’t reprimand them as expected. Her gaze simply softened and she sighed. “I know things have gotten difficult for you since getting arrested,” she said softly to Xavier. His eyes fell to the ground, unable to look at his ruined painting.
For the second time now.
“Make me something for my office instead okay?” She asked.
Xavier nodded, looking at her as she kneeled down to check on how Y/n was doing. “Thanks, Weems.”
The woman smiled. “Of course. Now go get your partner patched up.”
Xavier smiled softly, helping Y/n to their feet. The pair left to Xavier’s dorm. Usually they’d be sneakier or at least get some light hearted joking teasing from teachers or reminders of curfew, but today they just walked and everyone left them alone.
Y/n had stepped up for Nevermore ajd taken hits for it. They could have this one.
Once inside, Xavier sat them down on his bed (It smelled like him and he knew they’d like that). Then he got a wet rag, disinfectant and a few bandages. He sat next to Y/n, reaching over to hold their chin as he used the rag to softly dab and wipe the blood away, cleaning the cut.
They hissed, leaning away on instinct. Xavier shot them a half amused look. “We love a knight in shining armor but now I have to patch you up like the good boyfriend I am. So please stay still.”
Y/n did a little pout. “Can’t you just kiss it better?”
Xavier chuckled. Then he sobered a bit as he realized their eyes were dilated and their gaze seemed a little unfocused.
Shit.
“Hey, are you feeling anything abnormal other than the pain from the bruising and cuts?” He asked, trying to move their chin so their eyes would meet his. They seemed to struggling with the task.
Y/n just shrugged. “My head hurts a little. He got like, two good hits in. But only in the beginning. I landed on the ground before he got on top of me and then I sort of flipped us over and-“ They shrugged again.
Xavier frowned. “Did you hit your head?”
Y/n laughed at that. “Several times. Between his fist and the concrete I got a few good whacks.”
Xavier bit back an angry comment. That wouldn’t help them right now. He would chide Y/n for being reckless and apathetic with their well being another time. “Y/n, you have a concussion.” He raised an accusing eyebrow.
Y/n grinned. “Not surprised I got a bit roughed up falling for you.”
Xavier snorted, rolling his eyes and dodging his partner as they went in for a kiss. “You cannot flirt your way out of this. You should have told me that you hit your head. I could have made it worse.”
Y/n sighed, leaning against the end of the bed, first pushing a pillow behind him so the post didn’t dig into his back. “I’m sorry Xav I just. Tired.” They nestled into the bed and closed their eyes, as if to sleep.
Xavier pulled them into a sitting position, heart swelling when they whined. They were so adorable right now…
He had go focus.
“You can’t fall asleep when you have s concussion darling we don’t know exactly how bad your concussion is.”
Y/n rolled his eyes but conceded. “Fine. Continue your treatment Doctor Thorpe.”
A smile ghosted at his lips again, unable to help himself. “Okay sit still and I’ll try to get the rest of your face.”
“Not my face,” Y/n groaned. “My money winner!”
A chuckle bubbled from Xavier as he was caught off guard by the near drunk way Y/n was acting right now. He seemed to be able to focus more easily now and wasn’t slurring his words, and he seemed to be keeping his balancing sitting up fine enough so Xavier was unworried enough to be able to enjoy the shenanigans. “Whatever, Y/n.” He reached the rag forward to wipe more of the blood away. Y/n ducked the rag and leaned in again for a kiss. This time they got a peck before Xavier ducked out of the way. “Y/n,” he chided.
The put on their best pleading face. “One kiss and I’ll sit still?”
Xavier sighed, taking a second before conceding. “Fine.” They made a squeaky noise of celebration before puckering up, leaning in. Xavier chuckled before shifting his hold from their chin to their jaw, leaning in for a long and deep and sincere kiss. When he leaned away they whined and he found himself suddenly sickly in love. “Please let me finish?”
Y/n hesitated, eyes locked on the details of Xavier’s face, drinking in how he was looking at them right now. They pursed their lips. “Xav. You know you’re not a monster, right?”
Xavier felt something warm settle in his chest. Y/n was always so aware and caring of him, even when they were concussed.
God he was lucky. “I know.” His thumb brushed across their cheek, expression soft. He was melted to the floor in love with them.
They smiled. “Good.” They settled into a single spot, lifting their chin and offering their face for cleaning. Xavier went back to work, thanking whoever was listening above that even though people were cruel and mistakes haunted you even when the mistakes weren’t yours - that despite all the bad in the world, Xavier had Y/n. Someone so good they single handedly balanced everything else.
He could paint another picture. They were worth that.
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