#I can't anymorw
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I can't do this anymore
I can't do this anymore
I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE
No body's gonna miss me anyway
#rock rambles#delete later#maybe i'm better off dead#I'm sorry#I can't anymorw#No one cares#No one would miss me#It doesnt matter#I dont matter
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omg it's my birthday AGAIN this year????
#i wanted to makw this post later but i accidentally wokw up at like 5am and i really can't sleep anymorw#but HEHE WOOOOOO#IM 21 WHAT THE FUCK i'll edit my bio later#leo.txt
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#i am once again here to talk in the tags#tw for mental health issues and me just generally talking about struggling i guess#this is your chance to scroll past#so i am once again feeling overwhelmed haha#yeah texting my parents about taking a gap was the smartest thing i did#i can't do this for a while#i just need to like stop for a year and not run on empty anymorw#i feel like I'm drowning in school work all the fucking time#i didn't even submit this essay because my brain was just not#I'm hoping my convenor let's me submit it late#i honestly just need to submit it because the way things are looking I'm a little worried about graduating ngl#or graduating well enough to enter my next phase of study post gap year#it just feels like so fucking much all the time#on a brighter note i took a shower and took care of my hair and i feel more human now#so there's that in the realm of small victories#i know i can do this#i still have a little over a month to turn shit around#well around enough to graduate with a decent average#hopefully#there is always tomorrow#rj vents#this feels more like a vent so I'll tag it as such lol#i don't even do things i enjoy#i really need to try reintroducing stuff that brought me joy in my life again#outside of writing that is#that does still bring me happiness#other than that? lmao.#but i do need to try
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i need to start eating bigger quantities now that i'm on a 40-hour week of physical work i end most of my days fucking nauseous probably from the lack of blood sugar or smth and this cannot. continue
#i'm not intentionally eating not enough i'm just bad at planning and still adjusting#but yeah kind of funny to directly realize the change in needs compared to uni#(tbh i didn't eat enough back then either bc. well. you know :3)#but i'm working now. and moving my body around a lot. no time for that silliness#we have to admit i can't go through the day on coffee and one (1) sandwich anymorw#.parakeet
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I hate planes
#like it's not even the fear of falling to my death anymorw cuz i can deal with it now lol#it's the AC and the being cramped with strangers for 3 hours and the weird noises the bloody machine makes that i can't stop hearing#and the bloody atmospheric pressure that prevents me from hearing my own thoughts even with my headphones on#venting#personal#ugghhh#and now i have a headache
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I know I'm sick and yet I'm about to loose the rest of my sanity cause I'm so desperately wishing for my body to look like the way it did when I was 16
#I know I'm an adult now and therefore have a different body than back then#but I'm still so freaking upset abour ir#upset is the wrong word tho#i'm loosing my mind#I hate this#why can't I go a week without hating my body#I don't want to feel insecure anymorw#Faking confidence is supposed ti make me more confident#well here I am despairing#personal#rant
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me right now
give me a second, i'm going bvb full throttle mode
#sometimes. i miss haaland at dortmund.#he was so funny.#now at city i can't find him funny anymorw#cl lb
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hi im the stoner gee anon.. :3 im back 4 more.. and its bad its not even stoner gee anymorw..
2019 gee who grooms u and wants to make u his oblivious-to-how-wrong-your-relationship-is gf/bf!! you guys would meet at some umbrella academy panel thing. he's so enamored by you when you walk up to the table, so much so that when you ask for a signature and drawing, he just HAS to put his number on there..
you're happy, anyone would be happy that a celebrity noticed them. but no, this is gerard way.. the man of ur dreams. as soon as you get home, you lock yourself in your room and text him, shuffling around and pacing like crazy as you anticipate his response. he starts off easy, just making small talk and asking you about your dreams... then a few weeks in or so, he'll drop the bomb that he slipped you his number 'cus he thought you were so beautiful. just stunning, actually.
he eventually starts talking about issues in his own relationship, telling you about how the sex is just so boring and sad.. how his marriage doesn't even feel like a marriage anymore. you feel a little uncomfortable that he's telling you this, but anything to help your heroic idol, right?! then he goes back to how pretty you are, saying that he wishes he had married you, that you were older so he could've met you earlier, so it could actually happen.
there's a night where he calls you, and he's breathing quite heavily. you ask, "what's wrong?" and he brushes it off, replying with a dismissive "nothing." on the other side of the line, his pants are tugged down, his hand's just ghosting over his cock, and he's so turned on. he's been thinking about you so much lately. "how was your day?" he asks, now teasing the tip of his cock, smearing pre-cum over it.. you're not even sure what's going on, but you oblige, telling about how mundane it all was. you can hear small whines over the phone, but you keep going. his hand is going so fast, pumping up and down with every word you say. you get to how you took a shower earlier, a fleeting comment, and he quite literally cums seconds after, with the photo in his imagination. he tries to hold the moans back, but he can't. and it's all finally clicked in your mind.
that was so long. i'm so sorry. but i'm not. i love your posts and these r my gifts to you <3
tw: MAJOR TW! underage, grooming, weirdo behavior. dead dove don't eat i didn't edit this this is literally my pure, unedited thoughts. i did not hold back LMFAO
STONER GEE ANON 😭😭😭😭 i want to give you the world. THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!
i love this dynamic so much ong MY TAKE BELOW
you swear that it wasn't creepy. like, a man in his forties giving his underage fan his number sounds bad, but it didn't sound bad to you. because he was your hero, he saved your life! it's not creepy.
it was when he admitted that he gave you his number because he thought you were attractive that you were hit my a bad, nauseating feeling. but you buried that feeling deep, deep down. he was just complimenting you. gerard way thought you were attractive circled your head alot.
gerard likes to talk a lot. he can go on and on about media that he likes. whether it be a book or a music album, he can go on for ages. you don't have the heart not to listen or tell him you were busy or anything. this was the person that gave you comfort for years, how could you deny a chance to talk to him? even if he's the only one talking.
then it stopped being about comic books, music, or books. things got personal. really personal. and, honestly you were a little uncomfortable when he shared graphic descriptions about his sex life. did you stop him? no. it was gerard way. you awkwardly laughed when he said he wished he could marry you, hoping he was joking even though you knew he wasn't.
this goes on for almost everyday. he'd lock himself in his office, talking to you for hours. when you told him you had school or anything, he'd guilt trip you until he settles for a quick (2, 3 hour?) call before you go to bed.
but despite your gut telling you that he has ill intentions, you were so attached. you were already attached before he gave you his number. and maybe that's why he felt so comfortable sharing these things with you like there were no possible consequences. he knows you can't let go of him.
and maybe that's why he has no shame when he calls you, dick in hand, painfully hard and asking about your day. your voice sounded so good to him, he could've finished just by listening to you. but when you let it slip that you showered was more than he could ask for. he let out a moan that you could hear from your end of the call and when you realized what was happening you hung up quickly.
nothing changed after that. he messaged you asking when you were free so you both could hop in a call, like he didn't just have a one sided SOP with you. you obviously didn't address it. but, you also gave him the time you were available. because how could you decline talking to your hero?
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batgirl 2000 reread bcs I'm crazyy...IM NUTS!!!
her and that damned rose..what does it all MEAN!!! it makes a reappearance l8r...also I missed this dynamic so so bad. me when I'm in a seeing my kids as an extension of myself competition and my opponent is Bruce Wayne
I always forget how fucking potent and tension filled the first arc of this comic is man. it's like, bcs cass can't speak or even have thought bubbles everything's communicated via her actions or the words of the ppl around her. every panel she's in has to be chock-full of emotion and every time she interacted with someone the implications and the ffUCKKKKK‼️
the atmosphere in this damn comic man
I dunno man not to "back in my day!" when it wasn't even my day. but comics these days don't trust the audience even a little. there's always gotta be paragraphs of text having a character explicitly state every detail of their motivation and like not that old comics didn't also do that but at least the words they wrote were pretty like fuck man who are they hiring to write this shit anymorw
this transition is straight out of a movie. I know we say this with literally everything but if ANY comic in the world should get an animated show it has to be this one. top contender. it's formulated like one already, it's episodic w perfect overall themes and bigger plots. even the vibe is perfect, the grainy mtv cartoon thing it has going. every day I pray for a batgirl 2000 cartoon it'd go so crazy jsut adapt the shit straight
batgirl 2000 just keeps hitting you and doesn't let up bcs in the same episode SORRY issue..where cass meets lady Shiva for the first time is also the same issue where babs first begins to address her as Cassandra
^^WHICH IS CRAZY bcs we have to keep in mind that up to this point cass is nameless, she's only been referred to as batgirl. this is one of the first times she goes out as not batgirl too tho, bcs Bruce benched her. it's GAHHHHH that whole thing where vigilantes angst and drama abt titles and legacies and their individual identities is exacerbated so so bad for cass bcs batgirl is the first name she's ever given. like it's all she ever knew and ever was. Cassandra came after and THIS
THIS PANEL RUGHT HERE ohhh my god it makes me crazy. she's only batgirl. she doesn't even have the words to explain it yet. she's only a reflection of the city she's sworn to protect its all she is and at first its lowkey all Bruce let's her be. not to mention. her relationship w babs, I'll speak on them l8r can't do it now I'll explode
a 1:1 animated series man. it's all I can think about so so many iconic moments. I don't kill but I don't lose either is already as cold as cold gets. the way the comic is formatted already fully visualizes as animated in my brain and it's so so fun to watch
LIKE LOOK AT THIS!! cinematic as he'll and it's not even moving..
both cass and Bruce hit the bullseye like....
Cass's perfectionism is such an underrated character trait of hers (in like the greater batfam fandom and more modern comics not here, never here) bcs she literally sacrifices her life about it. she's so self detrimental about how not perfect she is anymore and Bruce's nonsense doesn't help either. man sees himself reflected in a teenage girl once and looses all his damn sense. I'm just, yea we know "mediocre for a life time or perfect for a year" < god that goes hard, but the true tragedy that is cass's inability to see how unnatural and upsetting it is that her mind works the way it does at all, that she can run into bullets head on but complains that she could do it with more skill when she was 6 or whatever like girl...never evr letting myself become desensitized to her trauma, David cain when I get you...
AND ANOTHER THING AND ANOTHER THING!!! KKKKKKKKK!! the sideplots and b plots and background characters in this comic..each of them are offered so much empathy by the narrative and are written purposefully to reflect or foil whatever cass's current conflic is all while feeling like fully fleshed characters even if they only appear for one issue
^^ I have feeling abt these panels but my lawyers are advising me not to speak atvthis ttime
THFUCKINH THE ROSE!!AGAIN!!! so sure this is old news but my running theory is that it definitely ties into cass's sense of self and identity outside of her living weapon status. this whole issue is prime babs v. bruce custody battle material bcs babs wants cass to be able to have a normal life, to be someone outside of batgirl bcs where she is now isn't healthy even a little bit but bruce argues that cass doesn’t need that, all she needs is her devotion to the mission < now we don't have time to unpack all that but in this moment we see her make the choice, dropping the rose. in the very first panel of the whole comic cass does the very same thing, she drops the puzzle (representing her childhood) in favor of violence bcs at the time its all she knows THE PARALLELS HELP HELP MEEE
AND AND THIS NEXT WHOLE PANEL is so evocative of the first few issues where cass couldnt yet put her emotions into words. just atmosphere and silence. BECAUSE she's confused!!! bruce says justice is what she needs that it will make her feel better, feel normal but it doesn't!! she looks over the city and still feels..feeling!!!! she picks the rose back up and extends a hand out to barbara bcs she was right, she not Bruce, she can't sit in a cave all alone all day and feel better (<which arguably doesn't even work for him either)
in the next few issues she meets steph and tim which is soo fun bcs letting cass have friends her age opens up so much for potential dynamics. especially her relationship w steph, not just in a stephcass way but in a narrative foil way, to me at least
next post I'll probably talk abt cass's guilt, self hatred, and need for atonement but we move‼️
#and thats the first 20 issues!!#posting now so it doesn't get too long but im still going#thought bubbles#batgirl#cassandra cain#dc comics#batgirl 2000#bonus silly moments r joker singing oops i did it again by brittany spears and catwoman putting prerecorded scooby doo marathon on the tv#2000 posting
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such a SLUT I can't take it anymorw I need him so bad it actyally hurts
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Just hit a new hw.
I have to drive to my uni city today. 130km maybe I'll meet with the guardrail halfway.
I can't do this anymorw
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haiii :333!!!
I'm so sorry for no posting for SO long, idk what to post here anymorw 😭
As you all know, the app that i used to use doesn't work anymore for me, idk why...
But i have a little drawing of satogoh that i made a long time ago!! I'm so sorry that i can't give u guys more recent drawings :c
But i'll try to find another app, i swear LMAO
I'll try to post more often, smell ya later!!
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Does it feel good to get all high and floaty for us? 🫶🏽
yes yes yes it does
I'm getting sleepy and i wanna try to cum hard and pass out like a filthy stoned tumblr slut 🥺🥺🥺
i can't control mysel anymorw
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Sorry y'all I can't boop anymorw I gotta keep it at this
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Since I'm taking a break from writing I figured I could give you guys some more info on my recom oc Colten!✨
some are nsfw btw!
If you have anymorw questions about her feel free to ask me in my inbox!💞
Colten is 21 years old (also 31)
She is 8 foot 10 inches tall
Colten's hair is a longer style of a wolf cut.
When she's mad she will done right hiss at anyone, like a feral cat. (Lyle thinks it's hot as hell)
She's vary bad at hiding her emotions. Her ears and tail normally give her away.
She has a strong dislike for rainstorm, bonus if its a thunder storm she gets PTSD flash backs.
Colten didn't die instantly when she was human. Her and lyle were close friends as humans and she was with his squad when he died. She ended up getting fatally shot and died two days later.
Thunder storms trigger her PTSD from when she was shot as human.
She doesn't remember who shot her but she knew it was a na'vi (Jake-)
Colten used to work with grace and norm as a field medic (in her avatar form) but she soon stopped going with them after she and neytiri got into a cat fight-
She signed up to become a sniper with Lyle, and he taught her everything her knows.
Colten's avatar form died due to stepping on a venomous plant that slowly ate away at her immune system.
Colten can't stand the sight of blood anymore, after having to try and save a little na'vi child when she was a field medic with norm and grace.
She knows a few words in na'vi, mainly greetings and a few curses.
She is vary well trained and skilled with her combat knife, she's done some crazy stuff with before.
In my mind I have Colten go through the advents of TWOW and stuff so she also has a ikran named bitsy.
Her ikran is black, red and orange.
During the war in TWOW she was stuck back at Bridge head with a blow out knee.
She has a tattoo of a thorn vine from her tail bone up to the base of her neck (spine tattoos I've heard hurt like hell-)
She secretly wanted her tits pierced but dropped that idea once she got pregnant.
She is vary affectionate with Lyle and their son. She's like a whole different Na'Vi behind closed doors.
Quaritch calls her "bitch face" because she has a RBF (resting bitch face)
She always just snaps back at him with come backs like "sure, gramps" or "better watch your wrinkly old ass." Etc.
She begs lyle to grow his hair out and gets mad and pouts whenever he shaves it all off again.
Colten still went on missions while pregnant with Owen, and Shes pretty sure her early labor started while on her last mission because she water broke two days later.
Nsfw below 🔞
Her favorite position is missionary and spooning.
She loves leaving bite marks on Lyle, there's something about it that's she can't get over. Seeing a big strong man covered in bites.
She has a soft spot behind her ears that only lyle knows of.
So whenever he touches it she whines.
She doesn't make much noise, shes more of a groaner or she'll make deeper moans then most woman. (But if she's in heat she's a whiny mess)
She is a big fan if breeding, she loves being filled up. But doesn't want another child at the moment so she kinda put breeding on hold-
Colten's kinks are breeding, biting, lactation and praise. Mainly because she doesn't get much praise for killing people-
She loves slow, sweet sex. Its her abosutle favorite.
She is a power bottom
Colten's clit is hyper sensitive (more then normal) (its a medical condition but i can't think of the name-)
She found out she had a lactation kink after she had put owen (their son) to sleep but her breasts were way to full and heavy still so lyle offered to help-
She loves it when Lyle moans👀
#roomie rambles^^#avatar way of water#lyle wainfleet#avatar james cameron#recom lyle wainfleet#avatar recoms#recom oc#lyle wainfleet x oc#Colten.M.Little
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