#upset is the wrong word tho
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thatonesherlocknerd · 2 years ago
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I know I'm sick and yet I'm about to loose the rest of my sanity cause I'm so desperately wishing for my body to look like the way it did when I was 16
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cultofsappho · 2 years ago
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just a reminder that the rwrb movie is not going to be exactly the version we have in our heads
it might suck ass. it might be fun.
It's going to be its own thing with its own voice, and we will always have the book, if it ends up letting us down. but also, let's not get too pessimistic here and assume it's going to be garbage before it releases either.
we don't know what it will be yet. we might love it.
there have been amazing movies with dog shit posters and trailers. there have been amazing adaptations of books that made changes while also keeping the core story alive.
it's from a brand new director, so we don't know how he'll do. meanwhile, it's also direct to Prime video... so yikes.
All we know is what the director says. And that CMQ supports his decisions, as far as we can tell.
He's said it will be a rom-com, with plenty of comedy, and the intimacy will be valued and important to the story. On the other hand, we also know they made the wild decision to erase Nora's religion and ethnicity. it also removed several characters we hold dear, and will inevitably have to cut many scenes we love for time.
that's everything we know for sure. There's positives, there's negatives, it could still go either way
I'm trying not to get my hopes up, and trying to stay realistic with my expectations, without writing the whole thing off before it's even out
let's not let pessimism win
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caladamn · 5 months ago
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Same anon with that long ask!! Like, I understand WHY people are annoyed and hurt/upset, but Jesus Christ I dunno maybe I'm just not seeing something but with how people were reacting, I thought the bitch said a slur or something I can 100% see how PJ's tweet can (and did) come across as a "lesbians shouldn't do drag/be in the scene" but I just did not read it that way? Maybe I'm dense and PJ really is a misogynist that doesn't believe lesbians should do drag, but I read it as a direct attack on Chappell - not lesbians and women in the drag scene as a whole! Again, I understand why people saw it and took it in that way, and for it to be another "oh for gods sake, a white gay guy hates lesbians - whats fucking new" because there are WAY too many of those types of gay guys, but I truly do not think that's what PJ was aiming for? As for the PJ hearing bad things about Chappell - has there been any development on that? Did PJ specify if she heard it from drag queens or just random people on twitter? Cause I haven't really seen much on it as I'm steering clear from twitter lmao It's all just so messy and I feel like the whole thing was blown WAY out of proportion. Should PJ have said it? No. Do I think she meant it in the way many are accusing her of? No. Do I think she deserves to be educated and listen to those that are RESPECTFULLY telling her why she's wrong? Yes, completely! Do I think that a lot of the people doing nothing but sending hate and not explaining why what plane said was hurtful are fucking annoying and need to shut up? Yes, 100% yes, lmao Hopefully PJ and Chappell can settle this, and the fanbase shuts up and moves tf on cause I didn't realise how many days had passed since it started like it's only been 3-4 but with all the discourse it feels like a week 'n a half have gone by
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todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago
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YEAH........... YEAH..... LIKEWISE, NO NOTES AT ALL, THAT'S EXACTLY IT... Main antagonist deaths are often treated as "comeuppance," but that would be the ultimate comeuppance for Aoki. As it stands, the only people who actually suffer for it are Ichiban and Jo, and Ichi didn't even do anything wrong. Also please I'm positive there's more to wring out of Aoki and Jo for an essay 😭😭at the very least, I always love to hear your perspective!
"he'd made a social circle for himself where people predominantly liked him for the power and influence" <- incredibly Mine-core of Aoki btw (I also feel the rest applies a little in terms of Mine probably being very quick to write off people who Do care about him as not caring about him, as with Katase, but it's nowhere near the extent of the Arakawas)
Wait actually it's kind of funny... for both Mine and Aoki, I was so sure their endings would go a certain way. Mine and Kiryu'd fight Richardson off together and Ichi'd, I don't know, shield Aoki or hug him so Kume couldn't get to him in the first place, or after that INSANE direct parallel to Arakawa running to the hospital with Masato, he'd miraculously pull through like he did on New Year's. Tormented with visions of the better timeline... With Aoki in particular, it makes me want to tear my hair out because the moment of him choosing to put the gun in the locker was REVOLUTIONARY for the series, looking at the characters he was most heavily based on.
Anyway. Bottom line. These bitches need to hug it out. It was so evil Arakawa didn't hug Ichi at Omi HQ or on the waterfront like bro stop being """manly""" for five seconds you're ruining my life you're ruining your own lives
There'd genuinely be nothing more painful yet more satisfying for an antagonist than being confronted with the consequences of their actions and having to navigate life after having making those decisions, ESPECIALLY when it comes to mending the bonds that- for anyone else- would have shattered long ago. With Aoki being motivated by the want to be loved and appreciated for himself, it would've been nice to see him finally acknowledge that he did have that love and start to better himself as a result (however much he'd be able to while in prison anyway lmao).
The Mine and Aoki comparisons are so real though, I remember joking to myself about it days after beating the game but it just fuels my mental illness every time I think about it ☠️ I LEGALLY AM NOT ALLOWED TO GO OFF ABOUT THE Y7 ENDING I'VE DONE IT TOO MUCH it makes me so mad every time I think about it 😭 ESPECIALLY THE PARALLELS WITH ARAKAWA AND THE LOCKERS UGGGHHH IT COULD HAVE BEEN SUCH AN EPIC CONCLUSION WITH THAT... Arakawa running from the lockers at the start of Aoki's life compared to Ichiban running from the lockers and getting Aoki to the hospital so Aoki can restart life I'm Going To Kill Someone (myself) (in Minecraft)
#snap chats#theres a note here about aoki's self hatred and ergo his inability to believe people could love him without 'worth'#and some kind of. I Dont Know occurs that comes with aoki accepting that love and ergo At Least Tolerating himself#and again becoming better as a person as a result. not WHOLLY you cant undo Everything Wrong With Him with one therapy session#but itd at least be a start and thats far more than anything else rgg has given since like. ryuji in dead souls#but w/e i- as per usual- have the vocabulary of a walrus so we're just gonna have to imagine i said something profound#AND THE LACK OF HUGGING IN THIS FRANCHISE IM GOING TO STAB ALL OF YOU. IN MINECRAFT.#with the power of delusions and this like seven-year-old wacom tablet i can fix that......#it'll never be enough it'll never fill the void in my soul but it'll be something i guess#BUT UGH NO SORRY IM JUST MAD NOW#nothing in my life has ever genuinely triggered anger in me than the y7 ending its just soooooooOOOOO#IT WAS SOOO CLOSE TO BEING PERFECT I CANT#im going to give myself a blood clot thinking about it anymore i feel my heart stopping Do Not Call An Ambulance I Cannot Afford It#so to stop myself from going in any more debt than i already am..... the possibility of any essays from me are very small#my ability to use words is near non existent. i feel like a right ninny sometimes#in any case im not sure what else i could expand on that isn't restating what you've said#cant ever be upset with bein on the same wavelength tho it gives my inarticulate ass a helluva easier time trying to explain LMAO#plus im petrified of trying to interpret anything from the english dub or english subs#and looking into language use is Very Much important when dissecting abusive relationships#i guess there's always just talking about general actions committed and not inspecting the exact words used#idk.. at the very least ill rotate the concept in my head and then fend off the urge to eat my teeth#i'm gonna throw up.... im still thinking of it........ gonna make an unrelated-but-arguably-related post in like three seconds#dont look at it its cringe
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homeless202 · 2 years ago
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the first time EY "stole" those headphones, the shop owner didn't have any proof it was him. despite this, he insisted on calling his dad, proposed to call the cops, and showed very little sympathy for a child literally getting beaten up by their father right in front of him.
-> why?
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he felt disrespected bc of how EY talked to him. it stopped being abt the headphones before his dad even arrived. he just wanted to see the kid who disrespected him shut up, apologize, and admit he was wrong. especially considering how many people were watching and talking abt their argument -> gotta save face and restore your credibility & pride.
this is why, in a way, his dad wasn't wrong to tell him to apologize bc he knew that's what the shop owner wanted to hear. sometimes, the quickest way to solve the issue is to give the person what they want (in this case, an apology) and walk away.
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youareacherryblossom · 5 months ago
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im gonna just show off for a second bc I was changing one of the preschool kids I'm proper bonded with and she's nattering on about her shoes and the colours etc and then another staff member came in like SHES TALKING TO YOU !!?? and I was like ?? yeah she's been talking to me ever since I got to know her that's normal?? and turns out she's selectively mute and has NOT talked to ANYONE else and I'm >:)) eheheh excellent I am the Traumatised Child Whisperer
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cinnabeat · 8 months ago
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lowkey the shipping thing doesnt even register much to me beyond the hilarity of it its just that like. story wise its a hideous move
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poppyseed799 · 1 year ago
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I feel like 80% of arguments I’ve had with my sister could be avoided if she just changed how she views apologies tbh. For some reason she acts like you ONLY need to apologize if you are 100% in the wrong and the person you’re apologizing to is 100% innocent. That’s… not true. Why does she act like this.
#one time my other sister did something that upset me but she couldn’t have known it would upset me. she apologized tho cuz it upset me.#THEN THIS SISTER IN THE POST TOOK BACK HER APOLOGY???? BUDDY THAT WASNT EVEN UR APOLOGY YOU CANT TAKE IT BACK FOR HER#BECAUSE ‘you don’t need to apologize for that it’s POPPYS fault for not SAYING it would upset her’ like WHAAATTT??????#then accusing me of like… GUILT TRIPPING HER INTO APOLOGIZING???? WHEN I LITERALLY DIDNT ASK FOR AN APOLOGY???? I WAS JUST UPSET????#then proceeded to try to guilt trip us for saying she was wrong to take back someone else’s apology. like maybe she wasn’t consciously guilt#tripping us (I doubt it) but it was just very hypocritical feeling to me.#(WHEN I SAID I DOUBT IT I MEANT THAT SHE PROBABLY DIDNT MEAN IT BTW I WORDED THAT AWFULLY)#also she refuses to apologize if it’s not 100% her fault and this causes sooo many issues to escalate cuz she’s AGRESSIVE about it.#if she bumps into you don’t expect an apology expect a rudely toned ‘why were you walking there when I was clearly walking there’#idk I swear she hates me. I always feel so awkward around her partner cuz idk what they talk about but I don’t doubt she might be saying bad#things about me to them. even tho like. I’m usually only about 30% in the wrong.#anyways kids. apologize when you upset someone even if it’s not fully your fault. that’s just how it works. it’s not that deep.#and don’t take back other people’s apologies lmao that was sooo weird
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tokyoghls · 2 months ago
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like a prayer — c. mayhew ・˳ . ⋆
✧ ࣪ ─ ᥫ᭡ cw. blowjob, oral fixation, cum eating/feeding, religious/blasphemy themes, fem!reader. innocent/clueless!reader. mdni.
☆ an ☆ hellooo, hope you like this one, I tried so hard to portray charlie as best as i could since I’ve just read fanfics and haven’t actually watched the series, BUT as soon as it’s available on Disney+ I’ll watch it 🙂‍↕️
**also, keep in mind that this is just a fanfic, I don’t mean any disrespect towards religion or anything.
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There wasn’t a way to explain the feeling, for it made his heart quicken and resolve to thin— sinful thoughts to dance around his mind like tiny devils with horns and tails, whispering wrongdoings to his ear.
He never considered himself to be weak and uncharacteristically doubtful. He knew right from wrong, yet he couldn’t help but steal a glance your way during mass— white lace veil hiding your face from his eyes, waiting for the minute you’d uncover and showed your tight knit brows and full lips, gaze set on the chapel’s ceiling as if looking directly at god’s eyes and wishing you’d glance his way instead, but you never do.
And he always finds himself thanking God you didn’t, as he wouldn’t find it in him to hold back if you had look his way and realized his sinful intentions, the way his thoughts traveled to your Sunday’s attire and pretty hands touching every surface in his office.
That’s why he’s been intentionally avoiding you— walking out of his office five minutes before you come to clean it, and if by any chance you came in earlier, he wouldn’t engage in conversation, making something up and mumbling a quick goodbye so he could avoid looking at your buttocks, displayed beneath that pretty white dress you choose to always wear on Sundays, or the way you chewed on your pencil in thought.
He’d find himself secluded in his room trying to find a way to get you out of his mind, and he found one, but eventually it failed.
The first time he’d done something like that, he thought all it took to forget about you was to rub one off and get on with it, but it was useless— he knew this the moment he realized, that, after every Sunday mass where he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, he locked himself inside his room and jerked off to the thought of you: kneeling on the pew, hands on a prayer and brows furrowing while your lips formed shapes and let out soft exhales with every word spoken.
Just like now, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.
“Father Charlie, did I do something wrong?”.
Your voice pulled him out of his trance, eyes blinking twice and mind focusing in the present. He’s daydreaming. Again.
“Mmh?”.
He hasn’t been listening at all, too busy looking at your clavicle where a cross rested to notice the concerned tinge in your voice.
“Are you okay, Father?”.
He nodded, hands intertwining behind his back and anxious fingers scratching at each other, “Yes, don’t worry, my mind drifted elsewhere for a minute- what were you saying just now?”.
“Alright, umm- I asked if I had done anything to upset you?”.
“Of course not, why would you think that?”, he scoffed, trying to come up with something to change the subject. He didn’t want to say he thinks about you in a sinful way, he’s the father of this chapel after all— it wasn’t remotely okay to think about one of his parishioners that way.
Your gaze nervously shifted to the ceiling, fingers fumbling with each other in front of you, “Well, you’ve been ignoring me lately I tho-”.
“Is not what you think, I’ve just been busy with… something”.
Well, he couldn’t say he’s been busy jerking off to the thought of you sprawled on his desk could he? It was the smartest response he could come up with but also the dumbest.
“Oh well, then uhm… my mom’s waiting for me so I’ll go now”.
Charlie couldn’t do more than watch as your figure disappeared and get lost in thought once again.
Since that interaction, he hasn’t seen you around much— you didn’t attend church two consecutive Sundays, but eventually you returned, looking as beautiful as ever. He’s watching you again, but just to a certain point where your parents won’t notice the lingering glances and tiny smiles he’d send your way.
He has just finished the mass, everyone scattered around, greeting friends and family, him too- he was a loved priest. And of course, your family had to greet him.
“Father Charlie, we’re so pleased to see you again”, your mother spoke fondly, gaze shifting to you, standing behind your father as if you were a scared child. “C’mon honey, Father Charlie is waiting for you to say hello- oh sorry, she’s not in the mood now, she fell sick and she’s not feeling well…”.
Charlie tried to ignore the fact you were partly avoiding him, gaze set on him but also full of doubt. He could just smile thinking that you probably thought he was mad at you. “Don’t worry, I was quite surprised by your absence, but I’m glad you’ve returned”, he nodded, adding teasingly. “You’re my most devoted congregants, and not seeing you here for so long had me thinking you’ve found another church”.
“Oh no! Don’t say things like that!”, your mother giggled and shook her head, “We would never, we’re very attached to this church, my family and I used to come here every Sunday when I was young- I have many great memories here…”.
Charlie wasn’t paying attention to your mom and her incessant rambling anymore, he was paying attention to you. Maybe a little too much that he didn’t hear half of what your mother said.
“… and now we’re looking for a suitable husband for our dear daughter, of course we’d want him to be one of our dear brothers of this church, they all are decent men”
That caught his attention and a mocking snort left his lips. Your mom’s confused gaze made him remember his current position, and awkward cough leaving his lips, “Don’t mind me, continue…”.
You, marrying one of these guys? One of these prude and revolting guys being able to take your hand in marriage…? He couldn’t imagine of one of them warming your bed every night, was it jealousy? That, one of these men, would have you first?
“actually- we wanted to reach out to you, father, we believe you can be of great help for her to learn the ways of a happy marriage, based on respect and love. So, father, what do you think?”.
He couldn’t allow that, not even in a million years.
“Sorry, what I think about what?”. Charlie replied apologetically, looking partly ashamed for not paying attention to your dear mom. Though he wasn’t sure what she was really asking for, he missed half of the speech because of thinking about your possible suitors.
“About teaching our daughter the ways to a happy marriage, you know, principles, respect, values… we’d be very happy if you could help her learn- me and her father are far from being a perfect marriage, and we tried to teach her to some extent, but we’d like it if she learns from God’s hands from now on…”.
Your mom really shouldn’t have said that.
“Fa-father, are you sure this is the right lesson?”. you asked breathless, lips puffy and covered in a thin layer of spit, glistening under the warm lights in his office.
You were quite confused since this wasn’t the usual lessons Father Charlie imparted.
He glanced down at you, hand touching your cheek affectionately, the corner of his mouth twitching. He loved your innocence. “Of course, you need to learn to give proper head to your soon to be husband- now keep going, yeah? Your mother was quite specific when she said she wanted you to learn”.
With a nod of your head, you returned to your task. Tongue peeking out to give a lick to his reddened tip, a bead of salty precum attaching to your warm muscle. You were so close to stuff him all inside your mouth, he’s been working your throat muscles to accommodate him completely and you were quite greedy now, you think you can take him all the way in without your throat burning from the tight stretch.
From your position on the floor, you could look up at any moment and see his conflicted features, he was holding back so you could learn properly— or so he told you.
He was being patient and generous with you, he didn’t want his student chocking on his dick on her first try.
“Careful with those teeth, don’t want my dick bruised”. you hummed and he groaned, loving the way it felt when you did that. A desperate cry left your lips when you couldn’t stuff his dick completely inside, it was so thick and long that it almost embarrassed you to think you could take it without a problem. He noticed that and caressed your hair reassuringly, holding your nape and pushing you down carefully. “Slow, take your time yeah?”.
Breathing through your nose, you held back your tears and let him take the lead. You tried so hard not to gag, thinking about other things like the rough fabric of the tapestry beneath your knees, just to distract your mind from the pressure his dick was inducing your throat in.
But it was futile.
He tried to pull you all the way down but when he heard your muffled gag, he stopped, leaving you to catch your breath, not minding the way your nails dug into his hips trying to push away from him. He held you in place and consoled you.
“It’s alright, don’t worry, it’ll pass… I thought you were ready to take this lesson, tch… I think we should stop now”. The voice that was once filled with lust, now was filled with mockery.
You made a sound denying his request, taking a deep inhale through your nose and engulfing his shaft inside your mouth again, almost going all the way down— it was still a hard task but you found a way to accommodate more of him inside.
“God help me…”. He murmured, eyes shooting up to the ceiling, chest heaving up and down, balls tight and jaw locked. If he kept clenching his teeth like that, they’d surely fall out.
Charlie couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, the way your mouth was full of his dick and mouth corners were glistening with a mixture of spit and cum, traveling all the way to your chin and jaw, made his mind spiral with lust and exasperated groans to leave his lips— he didn’t want to cum so soon.
You were doing so good for him, so good… Even if he wanted to blame himself for falling into temptation, he couldn’t think about that now— about the hopefulness on your mother’s face when he accepted this task. He wanted to make it right. So he was going to give his all, even if it meant tarnishing your innocence with his selfish and lust filled soul.
You started sucking his dick as if you were drinking through a straw, a tiny gasp leaving your mouth the moment his hips jerked, filling your mouth with his dick entirely, no restrictions, without consideration... Your eyes opened wide, nails digging again in his thighs, tapping incessantly on them to make him stop. You couldn’t breath, but you could hear his own moan ring through the room.
Your protests fell into deaf ears, Charlie’s hips kept fucking your mouth as if he was fucking your pussy— with a hunger equivalent to that of the abstinent man he was.
Even if he wanted to stop, he couldn’t. He felt so good he didn’t find it in himself to cease the attack on your mouth, he wanted you to learn, so stopping now would be wasting all the hard work he’d been doing.
Tears escaped the corners of your tight closed eyes, your clit throbbed with every push of his hips and moans he left out, you were so enjoying it even if it hurt a bit, even if it was hard to breath you didn’t want him to stop, not when he tasted this good.
“I’m gonna cum now, princess— won’t do that while I’m inside your mouth, but I want you to keep it open, tongue out”, he instructed, pulling his reddened dick out of your mouth with a pop, a thread of saliva and cum keeping it connected to your lips.
Your mouth opened and your tongue peeked out, showing the thin layer of cum that accumulated on your pink muscle. You watched as his hand grabbed his dick, jerking it up and down with desperation.
He lasted a few seconds before he came, white spurts of cum falling all over your chin and inside your mouth, “Swallow”, he ordered before you did exactly that. Charlie smiled, hand lifting up to wipe the corner of your mouth with the pad of his thumb, pushing it inside your mouth with more of his cum.
“That’s it… don’t waste any of it”.
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seungkwanniee · 1 month ago
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pairings : boyfriend!seventeen x gn!reader
genre : fluffyy, lil angst
warnings : mention of food , half naked body (joshua) , cuss word (jun)
synopsis : seventeen coaxing their s.o. after making you upset before bed time
hyung line ,, maknae line [soon]
an : this is a request from anon, hope you'll like it ! sorry if this took awhile but school is giving me hard time that at the end of the day im not in the mood to write smt. I decided to separate hyung and maknae line so I could post more quickly to feed yall. ALSO as a directioner im DEVASTED these days so yeah that wasn't the best timing so start writing again, this also didn't let me to keep up with svt comeback shedule 😭
〔masterlist〕
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SCOUPS 』
i think that seungcheol doesn't have an high pride at all, so it's pretty easy tho
and, come on, he is Choi Seungcheol how you can even resist to him
when after a long day and he finally comes back home he is straight coming up to you
even if you leave the spot immediatly, he will follow you around pouting
but your plans of ignoring him doesn't end well
you heart flutter by just hearing his voice because you are too in love with him
and when a smile accidentally slips out of your mouth, its when he knows you are all his
he picks you up, unconfortably laying you on his shoulders and walks into your shared room
roughly dropping you on the bed laying next to you asap
i know he has a thing for you hair, so he plays with it a lot
wrapping around his finger, smelling them and softly kissing them
has a BIG thing also for your neck so he never let it breath
JEONGHAN 』
he is not taking seriously any argouments and this makes you only angrier
but he really enjoy seeing you angry so anyway it doesn't matter to him
but when he thought he had enough for the day, he transform into a baby
he is following you around the house trying to cling into your side
and when you lay on the bed because it was almost midnight he find the best ways to cling you
he would immediatly hug you so tight without mincing words
KISSES ON YOUR NECK UUGH
driving you so insane with his angelic and innocent face
and his sooo cute voice saying 'sorry' nonstop
when you can't hold your smile in anymore, he is giggling uncotrollably still kissing you
JOSHUA 』
you two had a pretty bad argoument before dinner time because he is way too gentlemen with other women
so you just decided that he doesn't deserve your presence
you prepared your plate of food and insted of take a sit at the table, you walk straight into your room
hoping that he got the message and he will not sleep into the same bed as you
but after about an hour, when you finished your food and were already laying comfortably under your sheet, you hear a door opening
and who if not Joshua?
he doesn't care at all about your annoyed huffing, he is laying under the sheet beside you
and his goal is cuddling you until you fall asleep
you protest when you feel his arm wrapping your waist but his arms are just way stronger
he pull you closer to him as much as he can, he needs to feel you
when your back touches his naked chest, you can't do anything but relax under his touch
his breath against your hair brings so much comfort into you
he traces your arm with his finger until he hears your cute sleepy sounds
JUN 』
it's really rare that Jun is the one making the frist step after an argoument
he is really shy and he just feels so guitly that he made you mad
his precious baby ?!?!
he is usually awkward, the he will NEVER starts a cuddling session
so when you two have an argoument youre always the one that does the frist step
but today he made you way too angry and he can see it by the way you're not even trying to get closer to him
he wants to cry soo bad because he doesn't know what to do, he is worried that every move he will do is wrong
when the second night pass, and youre preparing to sleep on the chouch once again, he understands that he need to move the fuck up
he is in your shared room, where you were supposted to be with him, under the sheet cuddling nonstop
he nervously walks up and down wondering how to approach you in the best way possible
but it's easier than the tought
when he sits beside you on the couch, you were already all over him
because OMG THIS SHY CAT IS SO BRAVE
he is like 'oh, it was that easy?'
pinching your cheeks and nose kissing because he is starving
HOSHI 』
he absolutely hate making you upset but here we go
at frist he don't even got it, he just continue with his stupid jokes and mess around you
he always do this, like almost everyday, but today he touched a button that should've not been touched
he just frowns when he sees you walking awayt without daring a word
and he is like that for at least 30 minutes, you can almost hear the hamsters into his brain
he may need an help too, so he is on his way calling his best friend
and this sounds so stupid to him but hey he needs help with his beloved
bestfriend will 100% facepalming because it seems so obvious to him
but hoshi arrives here a little late
after he got what he did wrong he is RUNNING to you, jumping straight into your body
he lays on top of you kissing every part of your skin that isn't covered with blanket
also he would gently rub his nose against yours
kissing you under the blanket
WONWOO 』
he may seem awkward but this man is a reader so...
he exactly knows what to do and when to act out
he approaches you slowly, he frist want to know if he will get a slap from you or not
and if you seem way more calmer, he is cooking something sweet
looking cute in his apron and his black glasses falling down his nose bridge once in a while
he may not be the best at cooking but It's the thought that counts
and when his shiluette walks through the door with the sweet smell of pancake no shit
YOU ARE ALREADY ON HIS KNEES
he even forgot to take off the apron that hugs his waist
and his glasses getting fogged up because of the plate under is nose
he is way too cute, i want to cry
you dont even think about be cold to him when he lays under the blanket a little too far from you
you love his effort and his attention that he doesn't even need to cuddle you frist, you are the one starting the session
WOOZI 』
oh shit, did you have an argument? well forgot about him coming to you
man has a reaaally high pride, he must done it biiiig if he is the one approaching you after
thats why he is now complaining if sit by your side or just continue staring at your side profile
his eyebrows frown only makes his face looking cuter
i think he prefer think about a thing a hundred times before acting
and you can tell he is thinking a lot now
he is a man of words rather that physical touch, so he starts to talk to you after sitting beside you on the couch
and when all is cleared he surpirse you even more by clinging by your side
intertwine your arms and lay his head on yours
while his thumb slowly caress your hand and wrist
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celuere · 2 months ago
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Teased
photo creds to @/Sakupake_OxO on twt !
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Part two of the Teaser story!
Pairing: Arlecchino x fem!reader
cw: voyeurism, deepthroating (reader takes it like a champ tho), mirror sex, mild degradation, praising, arle has a dick here, full nelson, I actually suck at writing orgasms I am so sorry, not proofread
This took me like 9183929392 years to finish I am sorry BUT I DELIVERED! ENJOY!!!!
NSFW utc, MDNI!
„Sit.“, a black hand gestures over to your shared bed. You didn’t dare look up to her face. You knew better than to make eye contact with her when not directly commanded to do so. Knew pleasuring her underneath the table filled with other high operatives would come at a prize. But you were more than willing to pay or else you wouldn’t be standing in front of her right now. Being preyed at like a lamb cornered by a starving wolf.
The snap of her fingers suddenly echoed through your shared bedroom, followed by her hand lifting your face up by your chin to make you face her.
„I told you to sit. What has gotten into you today, hm?“, heat dropped right into your core as your eyes found the bloody X‘s of your wife’s. You felt your breath hitch, subconsciously pressing your thighs together as you couldn’t help but quickly advert your eyes again.
„Doll, my eyes are up here. I didn’t tell you to look away, now did I?“, her thumb gently caressing your bottom lip. Her voice was low, a slightly annoyed undertone to it. Didn’t really help the fact that your inner thighs were already coated in your own juices.
„So disobedient today… did I do something that perhaps upset you, love?“, she studied your face as if she tried to look right into that pretty little head of yours. Maybe so she could already come up with something to make you beg her for mercy. Maybe she‘s gonna let you bounce on her cock, maybe even coat your beautiful face with her cum.
To be honest Arlecchino could never really decide what she should do with you. She loved the way her dick fit perfectly into your cunt, the way you clenched around her fingers, how your eyes fluttered shut whenever you melted apart underneath her, her name leaving your lips like a prayer over and over again. She was addicted to everything even mildly related to you.
„N-No…“, you quickly cleared your throat, „No, you didn’t… I just… thought I could pass some time if I…“, a bite to your lower lip as you thought back to how she pressed her hardened dick into the palm of your hand.
„If you what? Decide to please me underneath the table in front of what? The other Harbingers along with the twenty high officers at the table? What if someone dared to have a look in our direction? What then, hm?“, the nail of her thumb now pressing into your cheek, you hissed slightly. Congratulations. You successfully pissed her off and now you can suffer the consequences. Even tho suffer seems to be the wrong word here…
Her cold stare was a strong contradict to her hot touch against your face but that quickly vanished as she let go of your chin before her hands got to work on opening up the tie around her neck.
„You know what happens to people who misbehave under my watch. Right?“, the words reached your ears but not your brain. You were too captivated by how delicately her fingers opened up her tie before they got to work on the belt. Oh, those fucking fingers. You remembered the first time she used her fingers on your all too well. How she had you clinging to the sheets in a matter of seconds, legs quivering as you could do nothing but pray for at least some mercy from her.
„….et naked.“
Hm?
„Sweetheart.“
The harsh grip on your face ripped you out of your daydreams like a bucket of ice water.
„H-Huh…?“, blinking once- then twice to regain focus on your wife’s facial features, it took no expert to figure out that her patience was hanging on one singular, very thin strick.
„I didn’t even get the chance to have you loose your mind over my dick and you’re already elsewhere with your head? I don’t remember teaching you such manners. I said get naked.“, the bare tone that laced her tongue was enough for you to rub your thighs together but before she might get the idea to not make you cum at all today, your fingers got to work on opening up that silken shirt of yours.
With gleaming eyes she watched you undo the buttons one by one, contemplating wether she should speed up this agonizing process by simply ripping the clothing open, her mind already working up a plan for you. Oh, she won’t just make you apologize. She will have you begging for her. Begging to take her cock deeper, to fill you up with her semen that you will never think about anything else ever again. You owed her that.
Earning yourself an approving nod as you were now covered by nothing else other than your soaked lace panties, the cold air surrounding you forced goosebumps on your skin as your nipples hardened at the chill. A lamb waiting for its slaughter. That’s exactly how you felt at this very moment. Utterly at her mercy with no one coming to save you.
You didn’t want to be rescued anyways.
„What shall I possibly do with you…“, putting her hands behind her back, your wife took a step to the aside to reveal the mirror she‘s been hiding behind her figure. That naked reflexion of yours forced a blush to creep up on your face. You were so very naked and she was still so very clothed. And for one particular reason.
Arlecchino wanted to let you know exactly who is in charge in this bedroom. Who is wearing the collar and who is holding the leash.
„Spread your legs. Pleasure yourself in front of me. You want more? Earn it.“, her tone left absolutely zero room for complaints or discussions, snapping her fingers to signal you to start.
Reluctantly you opened your legs, slowly revealing how your soaked cunt gleamed in the chandelier light. And she didn’t even touch you once tonight. At least not yet.
You traced your fingers over the slickness of your cunt, a breathy whimper leaving your lips, „Of course, Per-”
„You know my title. Make use of it.“, fuck, those words went straight into your core. Never once was she commanding you around or using her position in the Fatui to undermine or silence you, but here? In the privacy of your home? Let that woman have some fun, no?
Gulping down the nervousness, you replied back, not wanting to anger her even further, „O-Of course, Lady Arlecchino… Whatever you may… wish for…“, slipping your fingers now inside, you allowed yourself to fall back into the soft sheets, curling up your fingers in search of your spot. If it were Arle‘s fingers inside of you instead, she‘d already found it, but you have actually troubles with finding it on your own. Quite embarrassing, isn’t it? But what else to expect when she is already doing such an excellent job at fulfilling your needs in the bedroom.
„You need to push them deeper inside before curling up. Come on. Try it.“, with her eyes being fixated on your cunt taking in your fingers, you followed her suggestion by shoving them deeper until your all the way to your knuckles inside. The first curl had a moan after the other slipping past your lips. The second curl made you arch your back. After the third one your hips were practically grinding against your hand for more friction, deeper access. It wasn’t enough. No way in hell were your fingers enough to still the hunger inside of you.
„That‘s it. Fuck that pretty hand of yours. Make sure to spread them every once in a while as you still need to prepare yourself for me.“, as she spoke down at you with a low tone, watching you, analyzing you. How you had one eye closed for example. The back of your hand hovering above your mouth but not muffling that beautiful melody of yours either. Your nipples practically screaming at her to pay them some attention.
A gift from the gods themselves.
That was the only fitting description for your current appearance to her.
Parting your slick walls the inside, goodness it felt different. You didn’t have the same strength in your fingers like your wife did. They were nowhere nearly as skilled when it came to hitting your weak spot over and over. To switch between curling up and spreading them all in a matter of mere moments. Your hand- no. Your whole arm was growing tired, muscles aching as you tried to keep your pace up.
„L-Lady Arle- hah… A-Arlecchino… I don’t think I…-”, whimpering as the speed of your fingers was greatly decreasing, your wife clicked her tongue at you in frustration.
„Out of practice? A shame.“, her eyes now wandered up from between your legs to your face, expressionless. Not calculated. „It seems I have to use different methods on you… Take your fingers out and get on your knees. There is still a mess you need to take care of.“, tapping the wet spot on her bulge with one of her black fingers, you didn’t have to be a genius to know what she is referring to.
But you did as told. Pulling your soaked fingers out and got off of the bed to drop to your knees right in front of her as she got to work on her belt. The mere sight of watching your wife pulling down the layers of fabric made you rub your legs together.
And the sight.
The sight might just push you over the edge.
Prior to climaxing in her boxers, the tip along with almost half of her shaft is covered in the white texture. Even now there are still drops of precum leaking from the slit on the top. You did a fucking great jab back in the meeting. And you were proud. Proud to be the one to cleaning all of that up.
„Huh… seems like someone is admiring her work. Go on. Do your job.“, giving your head a nudge towards her dick until she rested it right on your lips. May this view brand itself into her brain. You, kneeling before her and ready to suck her cock will always her favorite. You were just so cute with those plump lips, the pleading eyes and Celestia above- your tits on full display to her.
Hesitant at first, you eventually submitted as you slowly took in the first few inches of her into your mouth. Making sure to swirl your tongue around the coated skin before you felt her hand getting a good grip on your hair and the Knave leaned her head back into her neck. Now letting a moan of her own echo through the walls of your sleeping chambers.
„Just… Just like that, doll… That‘s it… Such a good girl, aren’t you…?“, using the grip on your head now to shove your forwards on her cock until the tip kissed the back of your throat. Then she waited. Before carefully pushing her hips forward and adding the remaining inches into you.
With your nose now buried in her hair, the tears quickly began to sting in your eyes as you tried to slowly breathe through your nose, a slight gagging sound erupting from your throat.
„Mhm… taking me so well without…“, your wife actually had to take a quick gasp of air in between her words, „…complaining… That’s how I like… my wife…“, with an agonizingly slow speed she withdrew her length from the warmth of your mouth. Only to push herself all the way back inside. Over and over until she reached a somehow steady pace that was not to rough on your throat but still enough to have her occasionally moan out. That mixed with your own hums against her, needless to say you were a dripping mess down there.
„I want you to swallow it all up… don’t waste a single drop of me. Understood…? Hah…“, stroking now over your head and brushing the loose strands out of your sweaty face, Arlecchino spared no efforts when she sped up the movements of her hips. Tears staining your cheeks while you sucked on her until she eventually started twitching in your mouth before she eventually released herself inside with a low groan, nails scraping your scalp in the process.
The nutty taste that soon coated your tongue as she withdrew herself forced a grimace on your face, the texture of it didn’t really help as you looked up to her wit bloated cheeks. You loved the woman in front of you dearly but her cum was not it.
Slicking her hair back with a swift comb of her fingers, she tapped your chin.
„I told you to swallow.“
With no choice other than to oblige, you started to force the containments down, the salty aftertaste leaving a bitter expression on your face, you preferred her cum painting your face gorgeous face way more than this.
„Yeah, that’s it. Get all that stuff down.“
When you were done with the small appetizer, you opened up and stuck out your tongue to her as she took your in saliva-coated chin between her fingers to inspect you further.
„Mhm… not a single drop left. Such a good doll aren’t you…?“, closing your mouth back up as she sat down at the edge of the bed, your wife now patted her lap before making a little twirling motion with her finger. Gods above, this woman.
„Take a seat, pretty thing. Make sure to face the mirror.“, she waited patiently for you to get up on slightly wobbly legs. How adorable. But she decided to not tease you about it - at least not today.
Guiding your hips until your leaking pussy hovered right over her still erected dick, her free hand pointed at the mirror in front of you.
„I want you to watch. I want you to watch the way you‘re going to swallow me whole without any problems, understood?“, when you didn’t give a clear answer, she pushed your hips down on the first inch, „Understood? What happened to your manners, woman?“, her sharp nails digging into your soft flesh, you didn’t hesitate before sitting down on her completely.
„H-Hah-! U-Understood-!“, you tried your best with supporting yourself by grabbing onto her thighs but that didn’t do. One moment you were neatly placed in her lap, the next moment she had your legs suddenly restrained to your chest as all you could do was moan and whimper for her to be move while you were forced to look at the reflection of your cunt being split open on her cock.
The Knave was for once having troubles with breathing herself. The closeness. Your pathetic sounds filling the room. The way your walls clenched around her dick. Waiting sounded like torture to her. What should she wait for? She slid in and out of you like butter. Lifting you up and down over her length while simultaneously thrusting her hips up against you.
As for your part? You were already far gone as your wife dedicated herself to hit your g-spot each time she fucked back into you, dizzying your mind further and further as you reached behind you to bury your hand in between her strands of hair, begging for more - begging her to fuck like it’s her last day on earth.
Maybe you should tease her more often during important meetings.
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angelbarelywrites · 9 months ago
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♡ slashers scenarios | first meeting
info;
♡ fandoms; The Boy, House of Wax, Halloween, Hannibal, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, slashers (general), DBD
♡ characters; Brahms Heelshire, Vincent Sinclair, Micheal Myers, Hannibal Lecter, Thomas Hewitt
♡ reader; gender neutral
♡ cw; mentions of blood/violence
The most random array of characters. All 5 are my bfs tho. Also this is written very very informally because it was originally just for myself lol.
•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•
Brahms Heelshire//
> approximateplotofthe movie. jpeg
> honestly you mind your own business once you realize it’s a doll but assume there’s cameras so mostly behave
> you find yourself naturally coddling his doll like a real child when you’re bored, speaking to him constantly
> even though you’re not doing much to upset him, weird things do start happening around the house
> he mostly wants attention
> you leave a note one day
> “dear brahm’s ghost; i’m sorry if i’m not doing a good job as a nanny. i’m really trying my best. I hope we can be friends”
> he scribbles a smiley face on it and you’re a little freaked out / excited
> when he finally shows himself you’re really stunned. but it makes more sense than a genuine ghost
> you’re in such shock that you just. keep going with the evening and make dinner.
> but even once you come to your senses, you end up more sad than scared
> “…they left you all alone. I’m so sorry.”
> he gives you puppy eyes
> “…I won’t do that to you. I promise. I’m staying.”
> he’s even more in love with you than he first thought. even if you’re going to make him shower six times before bed.
> to his chagrin you don’t help him bathe
> but you do kiss him goodnight
Vincent Sinclair//
> bo brings you to him
> at first he’s making some big deal, “special delivery” and all that
> you’re cute
> really cute
> and bo clearly knew you’re the kind of person vincent would like
> but he’s still got a job to do
> damn it
> “h-hey- wait- i can help you—?”
> that makes him hesitate
> “i’m an artist too. i can help with the sculptures. “
> …
>“i’ll be good. promise.”
> he didn’t need much more convincing than that
> bo is surprised he kept you but makes damn sure you’re not escaping
> but you don’t even try because you just feel so deeply for vincent, and he’s so gentle
> you weren’t lying about being an artist so you’re genuinely helpful
> he falls madly in love when you help him resculpt his mask
Micheal Myers //
> Meet because you wrote letters to him
> Not to interview him or as an obsessive fan
> At first out of curiosity, then as a sort of way to vent, because he never responds
> But as it turns out your letters are the only ones he keeps or even opens at this point
> So his psychologist wants you to meet him to see if you can get him to open up- of course there’s a cash incentive
> He doesn’t say a word from the other side of the glass.
> Obviously.
> But you treat it like a normal visit to a friend and just chat mindlessly a while
> And you’re so much tinier and cuter in person
> He wants to stab you so much
> But realizes that if he killed you, he might miss you
> Ew that’s a scary thought
> Still wants to make you scream tho uwu
> He escapes
> Because he’s Micheal Myers that’s what he does
> After his spree he finds himself in your house, bloodsoaked and honestly not all that sure what he’ll do when he sees you
> You don’t even scream, just give a tiny ‘eep’
> “…Micheal?”
> He regrips his knife so he can get it over with. You’ll just tattle
> “Oh gosh- you’re soaked from the rain. And all that blood-let’s get you a shower? I can get you some fresh clothes too,”
> He’s staring down at you in disbelief
> “…what? You thought I’d try and call the cops? I like talking to you.”
> There’s something very wrong with you
> It’s kind of hot
> He puts him knife away and follows you
Hannibal Lecter//
> you’re his patient lol
> at first he doesn’t have much interest in you outside of work
> but god, you’d be such a perfect subject to manipulate with that little authority figure problem you have
> and even though you’re young
> you do recognize some of the finer things in life
> mostly his artwork and cooking. you’re really good at inadvertently stroking his ego
> he starts diving into darker subjects in therapy
> you’re a bit of a morbid person under the sunshine-y exterior
> perfect
> he’s still chipping away at something big you’re keeping from him
> he could do some digging online and through your files but where’s the fun in that
> he gets you tipsy and then starts with the psycho babble
> you finally crack
> you killed some guy that was stalking you years ago
> god that’s hot
> you liked it, at least a little bit
> even hotter
> you licked the blood off your hands and it tasted good
> he’s in love ; good luck leaving
Thomas Hewitt //
> car trouble! it’s always car trouble
> honestly when you rock up to the gas station alone Luda Mae is thinking that it’s a shame the fridge at home is already full
> but you’re the sweetest little customer
> “your name is really pretty ma’am. ever since i was little i decided if i had a daughter, her name would be Audrey Mae”
> new plan, she’s playing matchmaker
> there’s just something about you that’s so gentle
> and mildly off-putting, like the rest of the family
> she brings you out to the farm to see if they have the car parts you need
> and to stay the night, if you really need to
> you run smack dab into Thomas in his old half mask walking in- even Luda expects you to recoil at the least
> instead you turn a bit pink
> “oh gosh- I’m so so sorry sir-“
> Thomas stares at you
> You just shyly introduce yourself, talking enough for both of you
> Luda Mae is already planning the wedding
> “That’s my youngest Tommy- why don’t you show em around? Alright baby?”
> Thomas is a bit hesitant but you’re so little and cute and smell so good—
> He’s already obsessed oops
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tojbnuy · 2 months ago
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boyfriend!toji when you randomly get your period.
you and toji had been cuddling on his couch for the past hour. toji had demanded you watch his favourite episodes of law and order with him as you both constantly bickered about who had better taste in shows. toji was also using this as an excuse to have you close, one of his favourite things to do with you was binge watch shows and movies. you were the type of person to make commentary throughout the entire thing but toji unfortunately found everything you said hilarious so he didn’t mind (though he would never tell you that). you’d watched two episodes by now and you were starting to feel ravenous.
“yeah alright doll i know, bbq wings and extra ranch.”
“awww look who knows my order off by heart”
“hard not to when you gobble it down 3 times a week.”
you punch his shoulder, obviously to no prevail as the man was built of muscle and muscle only. he tackled you back and the two of you go on play fighting until you sit up slightly and see the red mark on the thigh of toji’s sweatpants. toji’s face immediately turned into one of confusion, there’s no way he was bleeding from some play fighting, it didn’t even hurt? but you had realised what happened, you had realised but you really really hoped this one time you were wrong. and then toji saw the small red stain splotched on the back of your pyjama pants where you had previously been pressed into him whilst you were watching tv.
“uh oh baby d’ya get your period?”
“oh my god i think so” and with that you had ran off to the bathroom and locked the door. your heart was racing and your face felt like it was on fire. you and toji had only been dating for two months you were sure this would be it for him, he thinks you’re disgusting he has to. you peel your bottoms off and just as your about to get into the shower you hear a knock on the door.
“baby you wanna pass me your pants and i’ll put them in the wash?”
God why was he washing them? did he think you were the type of person to not offer to? how would you even give them to him he’d have to touch them? you didn’t have the voice to argue right then so you folded your pyjama pants as neatly as you could and without a word unlocked the door and plopped them into his waiting hands. he sounded like he had tried to get a word in but you had shut the door just as fast. he was probably going to ask you to leave as soon as you came out and you couldn’t blame him how could you have been so careless? you hadn’t heard from him again whilst you were showering and as hard as you tried you couldn’t get the tears to stop. you knew periods weren’t a big deal but you couldn’t help but feel so deeply embarrassed at what had happened. with trembling hands you crept your way to his bedroom and found some pajamas of yours you’d left on a previous stay. you’d also kept a stash of pads in his drawers for emergencies you just didn’t think they’d be this humiliating.
“mama you finished?”
after a few deep breaths you opened the door and braced yourself for him to ask you to leave.
“i’m so so sorry toji” you whispered, his name coming out of your mouth on a choked sob.
“mama what are you talking about?” toji didn’t know what to do. you were distraught, over some blood? he froze for a second at the sight of your red nose and bloodshot eyes, the hicuppy sounds of your quick breaths. then he swooped you into his arms and began caressing your back as he spoke.
“baby please tell me you aren’t this upset over getting some blood on me? like you haven’t cleaned my cuts and bruises hundreds of times by now”
“that’s not the same.” you said in between short breaths.
“it is tho baby. it’s just a bit of blood i’m a big boy i can handle it. in all honesty baby you could shit in my hands and i wouldn’t give a fuck.” he said in an attempt to make you laugh.
“toji ewww”
“kidding mama. kind of. seriously though baby look at me” he held your face gently in hands and lifted your head until you looked him in his eyes.
“you physically couldn’t do anything that would make me see you any less. you’ve done so much for me mentally and emotionally there is nothing on this planet that could ever make me be disgusted by you let alone something natural.”
you didn’t have any words to reply to him with and he didn’t need any. your expression had changed, the embarrassment had simmered down and all he could see now was affection and gratitude. toji understood you, he knew that sometimes you didn’t want to speak, especially after a long cry you had a tendency to stop talking for a while. with your face still held in his calloused palms toji pressed his lips into your soft ones. he pecked your lips, then moved to your nose, your forehead, over both your eyelids and then both your cheeks.
“my pretty girl. you want your wings now baby?”
and he couldn’t help but chuckle at the way your eyes lit up. you truly were his girl.
a/n : oh noooo he dropped his feminist literature books
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spookieloverslittlemind · 29 days ago
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Michael Myers x gn!reader
tw: references to being spiked (not by Michael tho) and narrowly-avoided SA, obviously murder and gore referenced x
2.7k words
gif credits: @victoryrifle
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Loud And Clear…
There are none that know Michael Myers' motivations. In truth, there are none that know whether Michael knows his own. To many, Michael is a killing machine who will stop at nothing, with no end goal, and yet...he is patient. There must be a degree of contemplation in a man - or monster - who chooses when to kill and when to return to dormancy; who refuses to run in any circumstance . And if Michael chooses who to kill, he has his own motivations for those he does not kill, too.
In the midst of a Halloween party that got out of hand enough for the police to be called, Michael Myers appears as nothing more than another person dressed for the occasion. While countless drunk and disorderlies are being arrested and shoved into police cars, there are none to notice the slightly-out-of-place sight of a man walking with steps too rigid to be anything other than sober, to sit himself in the back of a police car. And then, he waits. For what, is open to interpretation. Perhaps he is waiting for a couple of cops to take the drivers and passengers' seats in front of him. Perhaps he is waiting for them to drive him to the cell they intend to put him in, and perhaps he has not yet decided whether he will let them.
What Michael did not consider, however, was that a police officer would be foolish enough to shove someone else into the back of the very same police car he occupied. An easy enough mistake to make - The Shape is not the easiest to perceive unless he makes himself known - but it is a mistake that could have very easily cost someone's life in the age old tale of police negligence. Except, as two black eyeholes stare down at the crumpled mess of a person that has been haphazardly thrown onto the seat beside him, Michael only tilts his masked head. Having never been the most socially aware creature, he doesn't quite understand why you appear barely conscious, more so than the drunk people he had observed at the party. In the rare microseconds of your heavy eyelids opening, your eyes appear bleary...similar to the eyes Michael has witnessed life departing from, at his hands. Or knife. But Michael did not cause that look in your eyes. Something about that seemed...wrong, to him.
"Sorry...'m sorry..." Your mumbles are borderline incoherent as you try and fail to pull yourself up into a seated position, only to collapse on shaking arms and have your face pressed into Michael’s sleeve.
An apology? He cannot recall a time he has received one of those. From what he understands, an apology should have a reason; nothing you have done prompts an apology to Michael, in his mind. Perhaps his perception is too black and white for this, he concludes.
Your breathing is too laboured. Too staggered. Michael can hear it. Of all things, breathing is one of the easiest for him to read. Social cues are lost on Michael, but by your breathing, he can determine that you are not frightened, or upset; you are breathing as though injured, but he sees no blood. Lifting his other hand, Michael pushes your hair in different directions with uncharacteristic gentleness, checking over your head until he is satisfied you have no bruises there that could have caused your confusing state. This is drunk, but worse. It does not seem you are aware of your surroundings at all, except for the fact you have acknowledged someone is observing you in a less than dignified state, hence your apology. In fact, it would appear your senses are completely incapacitated, because you actively lean into Michael’s hand on your head as though it were a caress. Michael does not caress, he checks. But, he watches the way your head fits against his hand. For a moment, he does not move it. And then he does. Very slowly, he uses his hold on your head to guide you down, until you are lying on the backseat and no longer partially on him.
There is nobody to ask Michael why he gets out of the police car and closes the door behind him, but even if there were, they would receive no answer.
Clinging to your last thread of consciousness, your ears just about detect the sounds of distant yells and screams. Loud thuds. Smashing glass. With it all sounding so far away, and with the nausea and confusion that has rendered you almost paralysed, your survival instincts are...dulled, to say the very least. As far as you're aware, you blink, and the sounds are suddenly clearer. You are no longer still - though you are incapable of feeling completely still while your head and stomach turn so violently, but you can acknowledge the motion of being carried by someone. Or something. Flashing lights, red and blue against heavy eyelids. The only sound left is police sirens, fading until the heavy footsteps match the slow thudding of your heart. Or is it his, pressed to your ear.
It is not the first time Michael has carried dead weight. He doubts it will be the last. The only difference is that typically, the dead weight he carries is actually dead, and he is posing it in a way he sees fit. He has never carried someone back to his family home, but any who have labelled Michael Myers as predictable haven't lived to hold that belief for very long.
To you, no time has passed since you tasted your first drink at the bar; your eyes closed there and opened to a completely unfamiliar place. There is pain everywhere you are capable of feeling it. You are lying in a bed - notably, you have been very obviously tucked into said bed - that is not yours, in a house you do not recognise, and you dread to think up the kind of one night stand you may have had if you remember absolutely nothing of the night before. On the bedside table, there is a glass of water. It's a struggle to pull yourself up into a sitting position, but you manage to press your back against the pillows to remain upright. The pounding in your head does little to assist you in comprehending your surroundings as you glance around the room, but the towering figure staring out from the window with his back to you is something you would struggle to miss, even in your present state of...well, judging by the mask you can see on that man's head, delirium?
"H-Hello, um, I'm really sorry," An immediate apology being the second thing Michael has ever heard you say. If, this time, slightly more coherently. "I don't know where I am."
Michael brought you here. Of course you do not know where you are. That does not constitute an apology. Politeness is very confusing to Michael, particularly when he has never apologised for anything.
However, at the sound of your voice, Michael turns from the window to face you. He does not move closer, and he does not say anything. But he does stare at the glass of water, placed on the bedside table. His masked head tilts. A question, or an instruction, you can't be sure.
"O-Oh, uh...thank you." You realise this strange, silent man was considerate enough to give you a place to stay and water to drink, and the acknowledgement that you can feel you are still fully clothed beneath the bedcovers in a Halloween costume that is particularly difficult to remove is reassuring you that you weren't taken advantage of last night, either.
With that in mind, you take the glass of water in your hands and begin drinking down its contents like an animal dying of thirst. Only when you place the empty glass back on the bedside table, does Michael's tilted head straighten. And then, he starts walking out of the room.
"Wait!" You call out, but you can already hear his heavy footsteps thudding down the stairs.
Scrambling unsteadily out of bed, you attempt to run after him, but by the time you collapse on weak legs at the top of the stairs, Michael is standing at the bottom of them. Hearing you fall to the ground, Michael turns back to you. Staring up at you from the foot of the stairs. A crumpled mess again, this time in his home.
Lacking any sense of urgency, Michael ascends the staircase. Swings you over his shoulder. Drops you back in bed. And proceeds to stare down at you. It isn't until that moment you realise just how much admonishment two black eyeholes are capable of conveying in a single look. At this distance, you can see dried blood on Michael's hands. Staining his boiler suit. Your eyes widen.
"I...Whose blood is that..." You dare to wonder aloud.
Michael hears your question, but understands that what you are really asking is whether the blood on his hands is yours. Without warning, Michael grabs the bedcovers and pulls them off of your body, allowing you to look down at yourself, your Halloween costume - to see that you are not bleeding, or injured, and that the only blood on you is courtesy of Michael's handprints when he had carried you last night. While that's certainly an unconventional means of answering your question, he has at least partially answered it.
"Is it your blood?" Is the obvious followup query you present your saviour/kidnapper-who-may-or-may-not-have-seriously-harmed-someone.
Michael stares down at you. Towering over you, where he stands at the side of the bed. Nothing about his body language changes; he could nod or shake his head to communicate his response, but he doesn't. He just stares. And something in his stare almost makes you feel embarrassed for asking whether the blood staining his hands and clothes is his own. If Michael did answer you with words, he would tell you that he has no way of knowing exactly whose blood it is. That answer would not provide you much in the way of comfort.
The look in his empty eyes prompts you to avoid his gaze, lowering your head.
"Thank you for bringing me here- I don't know what happened to me last night. I was at this Halloween party, and I remember a guy buying me a drink, and I was standing at the bar, then..." You trail off, frowning to yourself as you realise just how little of the previous night you can recount. Typically, even after getting blackout drunk, you can remember more of a night than your first drink, but you've lost everything. You don't even recall having more than one drink.
Despite his general lack of awareness for social events, Michael is putting the pieces together faster than you. A man gave you a drink and then you remember nothing - something was in the drink. That seems obvious to Michael; a predator's instinct, you were given something to weaken you, physically and mentally, cloud your mind and render you incapable of fighting back. Michael can't understand the appeal of such a thing. Lends itself to a weak and pathetic predator, he would argue, but then again when Michael targets someone, they don't tend to live long enough to try and remember him. That said, Michael does take interest in your words. From the moment you mention "a guy", his masked head has tilted. That gesture is not a question, but a demand for more information.
What guy.
"I don't know, I'd never seen him before. He was dressed as the Joker, though- green wig and a purple suit." Your eyes are widening the more you describe the man, the realisation hitting you that the creep had clearly put something in your drink with the intention of doing God-knows-what to you once it kicked in.
Without another word from you, Michael leaves the room. This time, you don't bother trying to follow him. You hear the front door close behind him, and you sigh. Thankfully, on adjusting your sitting position in bed, you feel your phone digging into your back. A quick check of your location answers your question of where you are, and you're relieved to find you're not far from the friends’ house you were meant to stay at after the party. Said friend has already texted and called a dozen times, wondering if you are alive/got arrested with a bunch of the others; you text back to say you're fine, not dead, and not arrested.
The same cannot be said for the green-wigged, purple-suited man that spiked your drink last night, because he most certainly was amongst those that were arrested. And unlike the rest of them, that man will not leave his cell alive.
An hour or so later, the front door opens and closes again, followed by thudding footsteps up the stairs, until Michael fills the bedroom doorway once more. He approaches you steadily, one fist clenched. Standing beside the bed, Michael holds his fist out over your lap and uncurls his fingers. A silk necktie that is so soaked in blood you can no longer distinguish the original color of the fabric, lands on your thighs.
While you sit there, horrified and in a state of shock, staring down at the bloody tie, Michael turns and leaves the room again. His footsteps match the pounding of your own heart, ringing in your ears. The front door opens, but you do not hear him close it this time, and you understand that to be an offer of your freedom: you can stay or go, Michael is indifferent. But it is dawning on you that this silent stranger saved your life. Not only that, he avenged the trauma inflicted upon you, and saved however many others that man might have assaulted after you. So, with a newly warped sense of right and wrong, you text your friend to come and pick you up, then leave your phone on the bedside table, next to the empty glass. Gathering yourself as best you can, you very slowly get out of bed and make your way down the stairs, out of the open front door and onto the street. Within minutes, your friend is picking you up and you're recounting the most bizarre series of events with a smile on your face that you can hardly believe is there, the morning after getting spiked. Much to your friend's surprise, you don't ask her to drive you to your home or hers; you ask her to drop you at the nearest tech store.
By the time you are curled up in your own bed - having been checked over by a doctor and prescribed some painkillers and nausea tablets that won't react badly with the drugs you took without your consent - showered and cozy in your own pyjamas and recovering from the weirdest party experience of your life, your thoughts are still on the silent stranger. The shape. You made the executive decision to tell your friend you'd broken your phone at the party and it just managed to text her before it died, so you'd dropped it in the trash; neglecting to tell her the real reason you decided to purchase a new phone, on purpose.
There is a ding. Upstairs. A sound Michael has never heard in his own home. He follows the noise with a pace that does not accurately relay the extent of his curiosity. It leads him back into the bedroom, where he can see you made the bed before you left; politeness that he, again, does not understand. But the gesture is a reminder of your presence and for that, Michael feels...contented. A curious device sits on the bedside table that he did not place with the glass of water. Picking up the phone, the screen automatically lights up, showing a message from an unknown number.
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You stare down at the text you have sent from your new phone, your heart pounding with a mixture of exhilaration and anxiety. Then, you get your answer.
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And for the first time in human history, someone was satisfied by being left on read.
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ebsmind · 4 months ago
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𝐅𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐝 ❀ armando aretas x fem!reader
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summary: no one ever said love was easy. good thing you weren’t planning on leaving anytime soon even through rough patches.
word count: 2.9k
warning(s): angst!, fighting (verbally not physically), smut (mdni), oral (fem receiving), fab!reader, readers height being mentioned (she’s 5’2), reader has armando wrapped around her damn finger, ummmm probably abandonment but like for only two days 😭, soft!armando, mention of rafe x reader, not 100% proofread
a/n: okay woooo this is the first imagine i’ve written in a minute (if you remember my hockey days ily) i hope this is good and can meet to yalls standards! i had fun writing this and ik it took me like over a week but i really didn’t know what i wanted to do with the plot lol. anyways please send me any feedback and if there’s any spelling mistakes or anything feel free to lmk! this was also my first time ever writing in depth smut so i hope it’s somewhat good 💃🏻 also reblogs are highly encouraged! they help me out sm!
oh! i almost forgot too, i didn’t mention it in here bc it’s not that important to me but i thought id share anyways! i see the reader knowing the AMMO team but she has a different job (id say in hospitality or something with medical knowledge) it doesn’t really matter tho since it’s what i envisioned but i just wanted yall to see where my head is at! okay im going now bye! and enjoy 💋
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“we were crazy to think, crazy to think that this could work. remember how i said i’d die for you?”
The weather in Miami the past week has been bipolar. For it being the middle of September, it was chilly. Something felt off, almost like Mother Nature was reaching out. The rain had just finished pouring, and Armando wasn’t due to be home until another hour. So, when the younger girl heard the lock to the front door turn, she was surprised. He wasn’t one to leave early if anything, he loved working overtime. He always gave the excuse of 'wanting to be the main provider'. When he walks in, he sets his jacket on the coat hanger and doesn’t say a word. Weird.
“Hey you’re home early, what happened?” She stays calm. Something seems off with the 5’10 man and she doesn’t want to upset him even more.
He sets the keys on the dining table rather than the coffee table in the middle of the living room. He scurries off to their shared bedroom. She sighs and takes it as a hint to get off the couch and follow after him. Her mind runs wild on what could possibly be bothering him. Did Marcus find some way to piss him off? Did a raid go wrong? Did she do something wrong? There were so many possibilities of what could’ve gone wrong.
She walks into the bedroom cautiously and makes a B-line to the restroom. Armando had a routine when he came home from work. Put the keys in the bowl on the coffee table, find his girl, give her a kiss and hug, talk about both of their days and finally, hop in the shower. A sense of stability in his life made him feel somewhat relaxed and gave him a reason to never leave. He almost felt normal. Normal was a funny word considering he used to be in the cartel.
She knew the domesticated part of their relationship scared him and it did the same to her. Most nights she’d stay up thinking about if he was going to get up and leave one day. It wasn’t good for her and she knew it too.
She leans against the door frame and watches him get into the shower. He doesn’t seem to notice, he’s in his head and it’s bothering him. Armando didn’t wear his heart on his sleeve but she knew him well enough to know when he was in his head. Being in a romantic relationship with someone with an avoidant attachment style wasn’t easy but she needed to be patient. Some days were harder than others though, and she felt it in her bones that today was going to be a bad day.
She mentally prepares herself by taking a deep breath. She starts by saying, “Armando you’ve got to talk to me.” She uses his full name, no pet names, wanting him to know she’s being serious.
“We will when I get out.” He raises his voice, not enough for it to be considered yelling but just enough to get the point across that he isn’t in the mood.
She doesn’t respond, he needs time to gather his thoughts. She exits the bathroom and makes her way back to the living room. She picks up a book before finally making contact with the soft fabric of the couch. She needs something to distract herself with. About 15 minutes later, Armando walks into the room. She lets him soak in the silence, maybe he’ll get the memo to finally speak up without her having to tell him. To the contrary, he doesn’t.
Taking a deep breath she starts with, “I’m not in the mood to play a guessing game,” She pauses to look him in the eyes, “So please just talk to me and tell me what’s wrong.”
He keeps his eyes locked on her. He knows she’s irritated and wants to get this over with.
“And if I don’t want to talk?”
She scoffs, “You do realize we have to talk about it sooner or later, right? I don’t feel like doing this Armando, so please just tell me what’s wrong so I can help.”
“What if we don’t have to do this?”
Bamboozled, she questions him, “the fuck you mean by ‘what if we don’t have to do this’ ?”
“I don’t want to do this anymore Y/N.”
His confession makes the poor girl's heart fall to her stomach. She can’t tell if he’s being serious or not. Their relationship was a tricky one, just like any other. She’s seen her parents go through rough patches before for fucks sake, there’s no way he’s leaving without an explanation. Patience is running real slow between the two and the tension in the room feels foggy.
“Remember when I told you I loved you for the first time? Remember when I told you I’d take a fucking bullet for you? Hmm?”
Armando doesn’t respond. Typical. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for the young couple to fight, shit happens. But Armando’s cold demeanor is what was out of place.
She was his safe place and he knew it. She made it very clear when they started seeing each other that he couldn’t run away. Not from his feelings and most certainly not her. So for him to put up those walls that they desperately worked hard to keep down, was upsetting. To say the least.
With the tensions high between the pair, the girl took a much-awaited deep breath and spoke.
“My love for you is unconditional. I hope you remember that.”
Armando looks away and walks out the front door.
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“they all warned us about times like this, they say the road gets hard and you get lost when you’re led by blind faith. blind faith.”
The mirrors in the bathroom are fogged up due to the boiling-hot water coming out of the shower head. It had been two days since Armando stormed out of the apartment and Y/N was fed up, to say the least.
Armando’s behavior has never gotten that bad. With the way Isabel raised him, it was expected to be rough but he had been doing good, for her. Everything he did, he reminded himself that it was for the both of them. He loved her just as much as she loved him. She fell first but he fell harder.
Armando never thought he would fall in love, but he did. In the middle of a stakeout, he spotted the girl walking out of a cafè. He remembers the dress she wore, it was white, and long, with yellow flowers. It screamed innocence and he loved it.
A week later he found himself following her around. He wasn’t due to go back to Mexico City for another week and he already finished the job so why not kill some time?
Two days before his departure from Miami he found himself in her apartment with his head between her thighs. He never wanted to leave but he couldn’t let anyone find out about you two. The good thing is, Armando was an excellent liar and no one ever discovered his dirty little secret.
Once she gets out of the shower, she waits no time to yell out her lover's name.
“Armando?” She pauses and there’s no answer.
Her heart breaks just a little more. With the ache in her chest, she decides to call the one person who might know where Armando is, Mike.
Mike was someone Y/N found comfort in, especially when it came to Armando. She knew their relationship was tricky, but he cared about his son and so did she.
Mike picks up at the 5th ring. He knew she only called when it was an emergency.
“Talk to me. What happened?” Mike doesn’t need to ask how she’s doing, if anything he’ll do it after but he needed to know what in the hell his son did now.
Mike’s voice brought the girl to tears. She felt at ease knowing that Mike was always willing to help her in a time of need.
She sniffles before speaking, “Oh Mike, it’s been two days since I’ve last seen him. He came home Tuesday night without saying a word and left right after showering. I tried to get him to talk but he wouldn’t budge. I’m really worried he hasn’t done this in so long, I don’t know what happened.” She says it all in one breath, and by the time she is done speaking, she’s panting. Mike pauses before replying to the anxious girl.
“I’ll call Dorn and Kelly to see if he’s been staying with them but he’s been going to work. I knew something was up when he refused to talk to anyone.”
“Thank you, Mike, I appreciate you so much.”
“Of course, but Imma need you to remember that when shit hits the fan never give up. You hear me? Never give up, especially with Armando.”
Mike hangs up after speaking and leaves Y/N to wallow in her thoughts. She understood Mike was a busy man and had a separate life so she didn’t take it to heart but it hurt knowing that she was all alone again.
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“but we can patch it up good, make confessions and we’re begging for forgiveness, got the wine for you.”
Mike called Y/N back two hours later saying that Armando was on his way home. The girl couldn’t tell if she was happy that he was okay or enraged that he didn’t have the balls to come home without someone having to tell him too. Armando would just have to come home to see the answer to that.
The young woman was frightened, not knowing if this was going to end in a raging verbal war or if everything was going to return to normal. She didn’t want to lose Armando, like she said earlier, she loved him unconditionally.
To kill time, she decided it was best to bake her favorite sweets, chocolate chip cookies. She makes her way to the kitchen to prep the batter. When she goes to preheat the oven, she hears the front door unlock. Armando’s home.
Even after almost two years of being together, he still made her heart race and the butterflies in her stomach never seem to have left.
He walks in and spots her in the kitchen, her back is facing him. He can tell she’s waiting for him to make the first move.
“I’m home.” He closes the front door and locks it, his eyes never leaving her back.
She looks to the right and over her shoulder, “It took you long enough. Where were you?”
“I stayed with Dorn and Kelly. I’m fine Y/N.”
She takes a deep breath and mentally reminds herself that she can’t blow up on him, even though he deserves it. She opens her mouth but nothing comes out. There’s nothing else for her to say, he messed up badly and he needed to be the one to fix this.
“Baby look, lo siento, I do. I don’t know what happened. One second I was okay and then Rita said something and I just got angry. I needed some time to think. I needed space.” He makes his way to the kitchen island, he’s now 5 feet away from Y/N. He yearns for her touch. The last couple of days were hard and all he wanted was a hug from his girl, but he knew he wasn’t getting that.
The oven beeps, cutting off Y/N’s train of thought. She grabs the metal tray filled with cookies and gently puts them into the oven. She turns and is faced with Armando. She takes notice of what he’s wearing. It’s a different outfit, she knew for a fact that he came when she was gone for work. He had left with nothing but his keys on Tuesday and Dorn’s clothes wouldn’t have fit Armando. That man was 6’2 for Christ's sake.
“I didn’t expect you to become a coward and just leave without saying a word but here we are.” Armando could feel the heat radiating off of the 5’2 woman. She may be small but she was frightening when she was angry.
Armando grips the counter, hard, he takes a deep breath before answering the girl.
“I know I fucked up but I just needed space.” She scoffs at his statement.
“Needed space from what exactly?” She manages to huff out. She’s fed up and Armando knows it. One wrong move and he’s a dead man.
“Rafe wouldn’t shut up, okay! He kept talking about you like you were just some piece of meat.! I couldn’t take it! I get that you guys dated but fuck!” Armando's grip on the counter is lethal and his knuckles are practically white.
“Armando Aretas are you jealous?”
“No.”
She smiles and gets a glare in return from her lover. Oh, she was going to have a field day with this.
Before Armando came into the picture Y/N had dated Rafe for about 4 months. It wasn’t anything serious, but if you were to ask her what she thought of Rafe, she’d tell you he was a piece of shit.
“Well I think you’re jealous,” she wasn’t letting it go, “and I think it’s hot but you need to remember that Rafe can be a douchebag.” She makes her way over to Armando and pulls him in for a hug.
“Just next time please don’t leave without saying a word and you have to communicate with me.” She looks up at him with her doe eyes while speaking.
“I promise it won’t happen again. I love you, baby.”
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“Religion’s in your lips even if it’s a false god, we’d still worship, we might just get away with it, the altar is my hips even if it’s a false god, we’d still worship this love.”
Without a second to waste Armando sweeps the girl into a passionate kiss. He’s hungry and seeing Kelly and Dorn together really made him miss his girl.
He brings his hands down her body and rests them on her hips. He deepens the kiss by swiping his tongue into her mouth. As much as she wants to fight for it, she knows it’s his turn to take care of her, so she gives in. She runs her hand up to the back of his neck, rests it there, and occasionally plays with the hairs at the base of Armando’s neck. She was the first to pull away, she needed to catch a quick breath before being able to continue. Armando uses this moment to speak.
"Let me take care of you cariño."
Not even a second later, the younger woman lets him devour her like she's his last meal. He maneuvers them to the dining room, grabs her hips, and lifts her onto the table in one swift movement. She lets out a soft gasp when he makes contact with her neck. His teeth sink into the soft skin on the left side of her neck. It hurt, but not enough to cry about it. He soothes the small ache by running his tongue over the semi-red spot. She reacts by putting her hand on the back of his neck, never wanting him to stop. He has her panting, softly. The sounds go straight down into his pants. He chooses to ignore it, he's focusing on her.
He detaches himself from her neck to pull off the oversized tee she's wearing. He throws it to the floor. When he looks at her chest he notices the lacy fabric that hugs her breasts.
He lowers himself to where his lips rest right above her ear and whispers, "You drive me fucking crazy, baby."
Armando kneels in front of her and then proceeds to get a hold of her right leg. Before he continues, he looks up at her. God, he looked so fucking hot. His pupils were enflamed and filled with lust.
He starts to kiss his way up her leg, starting at her ankle, and right when he gets to her inner thing, she lets out a soft gasp. She's got him right where she wants him to be. Armando's right-hand grips the waistband of her black athletic shorts, signaling he wants them off. She lifts her hips and lets him do the rest. Armando takes off both her shorts and panties in one go. He was a tease, but not tonight.
He puts his hands on her hips and guides them to the edge of the table. He has full access and without a second left to spare his mouth makes contact with her folds. She shrieks, then it gets repressed into a moan when he finds her clit. He's lapping at her folds but it's not enough, she needs more.
"More, baby, I need more."
He wastes no time and inserts his ring and middle finger into her seeping wet cunt. Her moans are getting louder, and he fucking loves it. He continues by licking her clit, and her orgasm starts to finally peak.
"Oh fuck, yes, right there." She manages to speak through her moans.
Her right-hand finds its way to his dark brown hair, and she takes a fistful of it, not caring if it hurts him or not. He deserved it, after all, he left her alone for two days. She's close to her orgasm and he can feel it. His mouth makes its way to her clit and about 25 seconds later, she's coming undone.
Her sight fades to black and all she can see are stars. Once the image of them fades away, she looks down at Armando, he's licking her clean. She jerks away, from still being sensitive, but his hands immediately find their way to her hips to keep her in place. Not a drop of cum is going to waste. When he’s done he stands and removes his shirt. Y/N's hands go straight to his jeans, the outline of his cock doesn’t go unnoticed, but before she can get the zipper down the oven beeps. Both of their heads turn in the direction of the kitchen and the girls eyes widen in realization.
“What the fu-,”
"Oh my god, the cookies!"
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taglist : @Mayalife38535
(if there is a strike through that means i couldn’t tag ur blog!)
to becomes apart of my taglist, there is a link on my navigation page!
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wtfsteveharrington · 6 months ago
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c l o s e t o y o u | carmen berzatto x reader
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we've got so much history baby
description: set months after your breakup, you and carmen navigate what it means to be separated. you're trying to move on but waves always return to the ocean.
warnings: kinda angsty but also hurt/comfort. mutual pining even tho you're both trying to pretend it isn't there. miscommunication. kinda mentions of cheating if you squint but not really. no one has cheated but what to call this vibe irdk so! also mentions of using the bathroom if that bothers you!! it's quick!
smut warnings: oral/fingering reader receiving, spanking, dirty talk, hints of dom!carmy, unprotected sex but backshots for 'safety', sexting, semi public sex, lots of hickies/bruises talk bc carmy's a lil shit, multiple mentions of masturbation for both, reader has a drunk bar make out phase post breakup. reader is afab but no major descriptors used.
word count: almost 9.2k. the longest thing i've written so far!
a/n: dare i say this might be my favorite thing i've written possibly. aiming to make this a three part series but possibly could go longer.... i hope you enjoy <3
maybe you and i were meant to be / maybe i'm crazy
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
Carmen’s eyes are trained on you from the second your front door opens. His hands stalled halfway through taking off his jacket, only one shoe clattering across your entryway. 
“Where’ve you been tonight?” 
Which you have no choice but to shoot him a warning glance in response. It was late, you didn’t have the energy for a fight and that’s the complete opposite reason of why you texted him to come over. “I was on a date, Carmen.” 
He physically deflated at your answer. “Oh.”
You can’t meet his eye, can’t risk seeing his reaction. Would he be upset? Indifferent? It’s hard to decide which would be worse.
When you had broken up a few months ago the roles were clear - A case of ‘right person, wrong time’. He was busy, so endlessly busy. Working late into the night and heading in randomly during the morning or afternoon if he was needed. Which he could easily decide he was.
For as long as you could remember Carmen always took Tuesdays off to spend with you and get life in order. That way he had Monday to help the restaurant recover from the weekend and could trust them to handle what was, usually, an easier day. It was a tradition you took seriously and the two of you regularly made plans together every single Tuesday. Date nights, day trips, a mixture of adventures. It didn't matter what you were doing together so long as you had Tuesday to look forward to and help get you through the week.
Yet things started picking up. More celebrity dining requests, more magazine and tv interviews, more, more, more.
And it wasn’t that you misunderstood how important the restaurant was. Far from it. There were many nights where Carmen would come home a ball of anxiety because it took an hour longer than he anticipated and he knew it wasn’t fair to you. There would be a mess of apologies as he barreled in the door, bracing himself for a fight or to see your disappointed face. All of which you happily soothed by repeating constant mantras - The restaurant was his baby; you weren’t upset; take a deep breath; we’re okay. 
Then eventually you stopped saying you weren’t upset, stopped saying you two were okay. Eventually you stopped waiting up for him at all. At first Carmen would shower and climb into bed, confused if he should attempt to hold you or not. Your sleeping (Fine, sometimes you faked being asleep too) frame with your back turned to him. The blankets pulled tight around your body acting like a shield. 
Finally he just started sleeping on the couch. 
So yeah, the fall apart came quick. It was an avalanche neither of you could control nor did either of you want. There was still love between the two of you - But again it’s the right person, wrong time. 
You avoided each other for the following weeks. Carmen threw himself even more into work and you took a week of PTO to go visit one of your friends. He wondered if you were safe, you wondered why none of the people in the bar tasted the way he did. Your friend encouraged you with every sloppy make out conquest but it always ended there. You wanted to get Carmen out of your mind but weren’t ready for him to not be the last person who fully touched you. 
It didn’t work but does it ever?
Carmen watched your Insta far more than he should have. Risking way too many glances down at his phone during his free time to see if there were any updates about how you were doing. As if you’d post photos with long captions that mimicked a therapy session but he didn’t know where else to go. Sydney would report back what your story shows no matter how much Carm insisted he didn’t care. 
Because he didn’t, okay? He was fine. He knew it was for the best. Right? 
And then you posted a photo of yourself in a low cut top laughing in a bookstore. He zoomed in to see what titles you had in your arms as if they were clues and his eyes definitely didn’t linger on the swell of your cleavage. He didn’t think about how many nights he took for granted watching as your back arched up under him and you begged for more. He didn’t think about the way you’d crawl into bed at night and his mind would instantly rid itself of anything but you. He didn’t jack off to memories of you in the shower every morning because thinking about someone else, watching porn of other people, it didn’t feel wrong. No, that wasn’t the case at all. 
You, on the other hand, turned on Google alerts for anything relating to The Bear or Carmen “Carmy” Berzatto. Most of it was just good Yelp! ratings or fluff pieces from the local papers. He wasn’t one for posting on social media, in fact you weren’t sure he used it at all but you still posted like he was, but sometimes you’d find yourself scrolling through Sydney’s feed to see if she was giving you any crumbs. Sometimes, if you were really desperate, you’d find yourself in Richie’s feed even. It was pathetic but you can’t help it. 
One late night you came across an Instagram story post Sydney had up. Carmen leaning against a pinball machine at some gaming bar downtown. His hair was pushed back, eyes crinkled up with laughter. He looked at ease, peaceful. You wondered if anyone there felt the same… Was someone whispering to their friends and trying to build the encouragement up to go talk to him? Would he respond? 
Right, it wasn’t your place to care anymore. Yet you still cried yourself to sleep and yearned for when things felt so much easier. 
Yeah, the breakup wasn’t exactly going well. 
A few weeks ago you came across Carmen at the grocery store of all places. Both of you had gotten so used to doing the shopping Tuesday mornings and, logically, you were both comfortable going to the location just like you had been weekly for months. Your breath caught in your throat and God he looked better than you remembered. The first thing out of his mouth was, “Great sale on gouda this week.” And the only thing your brain could conjure up was, “Well that’s gouda.”
You both stayed silent for a moment before bursting out in laughter. 
Laughter turned to getting lunch around the corner. 
Lunch turned into you straddling Carmen’s waist in the car while parked in the very back corner of the parking lot and riding him until your eyes watered and you couldn’t focus long enough to keep a rhythm. He wrapped his arms, such strong arms, around your waist and fucked up into you for all that he was worth. Trying to prove himself in whatever capacity you allowed. 
If he couldn’t love you like he wanted, he could at least fuck you better than anyone else would.
Once you two broke the seal of seeing each other it was hard to stop. There was almost a forbidden aspect to your relationship now that caused a small thrill to run down your spine every time you saw him late at night. You were pretty sure no one knew you started… Seeing each other again and you were both content keeping it a secret. 
So that’s how you ended up here. Standing across from him at 11 o’clock at night on a random Wednesday. You try not to wonder if he left ‘early’ the second you reached out, instead convincing yourself that it just so happened to work out he was ready to go within minutes of you sending your ‘My place tonight?’ text during this horrific blind date your co-worker set up. 
Jonathan, 6’1, finance major turned CPA for his family’s company. He was… Fine. Just fine. You left on good terms in case you wanted to call on him for back up one lonely night. The problem was no one else was Carmen no matter how hard you tried to look for him in the people that passed by.
And there he stood across from you with hair falling into his face and his eyes looking up at you like you’re crafted from Heaven. A skirt, thin tinted tights, a shirt that exposed just enough skin but not too much. The soft shimmer across your eyelids and glossy lips from the lip balm you’ve been continuously applying since you knew he was on the way. The last time he saw you like this was when you were fighting because Carmen accidentally showed up 15 minutes past when you were supposed to leave for a birthday party at your friend’s house and that night ended with you locking him out of the bedroom while he had to pretend he couldn’t hear you crying in the next room. He really didn’t mean to be late. Sometimes the nights just got taken away from him. 
Carmen hated that you were dressed up for someone else but he pretends you just threw this on for him.
Your arms cross your chest, totally not attempting to push up your breasts, and you let out a sigh while you stare at Carmen. “This has to be the last time.” His face is stoic, a perfect poker face. The last time? Break up or not he couldn’t imagine there being a last time he saw you. Half the time he forgets, still referring to you as his partner while brushing it off and refusing to correct himself. Then there’s times where he comes home to his empty apartment and realizes you weren’t there to light the long forgotten candles on the coffee table or open up the windows to air the place out. 
He closes the space between the two of you and stares at your face. Searching for answers he’s too scared to ask for. Your resolve is breaking, cracking under the weight of having him so close. Beautiful eyes staring at you, the way he smells like the cologne you bought for your last anniversary and clean laundry. If you weren’t so drunk on the sight of him you would have put it together that Carmen kept clean clothes at the Bear to make sure he could change before he came to see you. 
You’re both silent for a moment before there’s two hands wrapping around either side of your neck and Carmen’s dragging you two together for a kiss. God, he couldn’t stand the idea of someone else kissing you. Would they even do it right? Do they know the way you moan when he licks into your mouth or the way you always grab ahold of his wrists when he cups your face? Do they know the way you forget to breathe sometimes when you’re lost in it? He’d have to pull back in order to give you a second to gasp in a rush of air. Does whoever you were with tonight know any of that? 
You pull away from Carmen with a broken out moan, silva connecting your mouths and the faint taste of cigarettes on your tongue from him. Clamping your hands on his shoulders you just faintly push the two of you apart, trying desperately to collect your thoughts. Carmen crying during the break up, sobbing in your bed, living on autopilot for weeks, the way he kisses you like he’s scared it’s the last time anymore because it very well just might be. Everything coming back to you in flashes as he stands before you once again. 
“I called you here for a reason, Carm.” His eyebrow is cocked, eyes flickering down to the bulge in his jeans that started growing the second he kissed you. “Uh - Yeah? Isn’t that what… I thought that’s what we were doing?” Carmen’s leaning in again, letting his lips connect to your neck. Warm kisses being pressed in a path up to just below your ear. “No uh, oh, remember how you let me keep the cast iron?” He hums in response, teeth nipping at your earlobe while broad hands start grabbing at your waist. “Yeah, uh huh, the cast iron skillet.” Fuck the stupid cast iron. He’s much more concerned with hooking fingers in the waistband of your skirt, attempting to pull it down while you’re fighting to stay focused. 
“Well my friends came over the other night and oh Jesus.” He’s licking a strip up your neck now, only half focused on your story. “Carm, please, they were helping me clean up and someone left it soaking in hot water overnight.” That’s finally got him freezing in place, his aroused little sounds quickly turning into a groan of annoyance. “Fuck. That ruined-… I mean, the seasoning has to be ruined. Assuming it rusted?” You nod helpless, fingers dragging along his chest while Carmen stares over your shoulder.
His eye twitches involuntarily. 
There’s a deep sigh coming from his body as he steps around you, finally kicking off his long forgotten second shoe before walking further into the apartment to head towards the kitchen. 
And listen, it wasn’t that you were necessarily concerned so much with the pan. Sure the two of you had purchased it together during the first few weeks of talking. Carmen cooked breakfast with it every Tuesday morning and showed you how to care for this damn pan. It was the closest you two came to owning a pet just… In the form of a nine inch cast iron skillet. You were more curious if he would care. A simple way of testing the waters to see if he just cared about getting laid or still cared about you. The answer should have been obvious but you still had to know.
You follow behind him and wince at the stream of expletives that easily fall from his tongue at the sight of the pan in the sink. It wasn’t horrible but wasn’t ideal. “Y’know, crazy thing is I’m pretty sure I can guess who did this. They kept trying to convince me cast iron wasn’t any different from a standard pan no matter how many times I tried convincing them that just wasn’t the case.” He’s grumbling to himself while crouching down to fish out supplies from under the sink, easily navigating your apartment from memory. The two of you had bounced between your places and talked about moving in together once his lease was up. Going as far as touring a few locations but the conversation was long forgotten once the tensions started building. 
As much as Carmen claims he didn’t see it coming, he resigned his lease almost two weeks before the break up officially happened. 
You hop up onto the counter next to the sink and watch as Carmen gets to work restoring your pan. “Think it's gonna make it through? I can't believe this is how it might end for the poor thing. All because I wanted to make your chicken piccata.” A few of his recipes had stuck with you and sometimes you find yourself making them when you’re missing him extra at night. 
“Nah, it’ll be fine. Just some surface damage s’all.” You watch as the muscles in Carmen’s arm move with the scrubbing motion, your lips itching to kiss over every exposed tattoo. Snap out of it! This is just sex between two consenting adults trying to let off some steam. That’s all. You’re both just comfortable and it would take way too much effort for someone random like Jonathan to learn what you like. 
Carmen catches you staring at him, not that you were being subtle about it, and feels heat blooming in his chest. He grabs one of your kitchen towels and gives the skillet a good pat down before sitting it upside down to dry off. It’s not perfect, not yet at least, but he’s pretty sure he’ll explode if it takes any longer to finally get his hands on you. 
“You look pretty tonight.” He’s coming to stand between your knees, reaching up to you with the hem of your skirt as you hum out a small “Thank you.” It seems like every time you see him lately you forget just how blue his eyes are. So easy to get lost in them especially from this close. Your hands come up to gently trace the features of his face. Just the ghost of a touch but Carmen’s soaking up the affection. He tilts his head in order to press a kiss to your palm. 
His hands are dragging up your thighs, feeling the material of your tights under his touch. “Know how much you hate wearing these.” Your heartbeat is picking up so much it’s making you jittery, hands wrapping around the edge of the countertop to grip it as hard as you can. Keeping yourself steady. “Help me take ‘em off?” You arch your hips up off the counter as an invitation for Carmen. He’s wasting no time grabbing ahold of the waistband and dragging them down your body, groaning to himself as inch by inch your skin gets exposed to him. 
Neither of you miss the way you press your thighs together once they’re freed, hips twitching in anticipation. The tights are getting tossed across your apartment and left to be tomorrow’s problem. Carmen falls to his knees in front of you, letting them dig into the harsh tile of your kitchen while in pursuit of making his mark on you. He’s grabbing ahold of your ankles, bringing one of your legs over his shoulder while the other is brought up to his lips. 
Your eyes fall closed as Carmen starts trailing a string of delicate kisses along the length of your calf. His lips ghosting across your knee until he reaches the fleshy part of your thigh. While your hands finally escape the countertop and find their way laced into Carmen’s hair, he wraps his lips down against your thigh to start sucking a small bruise into your skin. “Carmy,” You hiss out, “What if I see Jonathan again? How am I gonna explain these?” But you’re not pulling his head away, instead doing quite the opposite by keeping his head in place. 
Carmen practically growls against your skin, a low and guttural sound coming from the man. His grip on you tights while he mumbles against you, “Fuck Jonathan.” You scrub your fingers against his scalp as Carmen finds another patch of skin on the opposite thigh to begin sucking a bruise into. His head ducking lower and lower under your skirt, the material finally getting you to pull your hands away from him.
Against all better judgment your thighs fall more open as he works his way down your thighs. There’s a series of small moans and whimpers coming out of you with no control as he reaches the top of your thigh, his nose dragging along the cloth covering your core. “D’you wear these for him? Or did you put them on knowing you’d end up texting me.” It’s impossible to answer when you feel his tongue drag along you, your hips rocking up towards his mouth. He’s bringing his hands up under your skirt now too and grabbing handfuls of where your thighs meet your hips to hold you down in place. 
“They’re purple, aren’t they?” A color Carmen had long ago decided he liked best on you. Something about the way the color compliments your skin… In all honesty, you were pretty sure he had purchased the exact pair you were wearing. You started the night with no intention of your date getting anywhere near your bed but instead being under the frame of the man who was exactly where you wanted him. 
He guides you to scoot you closer towards the edge of the counter, making sure you’re comfortable before mouthing over you once again. Hot, open mouth kisses being pressed almost exactly where you need them. One of his hands comes around your frame to grab a handful of the fleshy part of your ass while the other hooks a finger into your underwear, pulling the material to the side to expose you. 
There’s cool air being blown against your overheated body and your hands fly back to clutch at his back, his neck, the hair that’s exposed from under your skirt. Whatever inch of him you can find is being clung to like a lifeboat. He’s kissing the skin where your thigh meets your center, lips ghosting along the outer side of your folds. It only takes a few more pathetic whimpers before he finally takes pity on you and you feel his tongue go flat at the base of your hole, dragging up long and slow all the way to your clit. 
He groans into your core and the vibrations make you start to lose your mind. “Fuck. Fuck!” Carmen’s got your clit between his lips now, bobbing his head just slightly while he goes right to sucking on the sensitive bundle of nerves. If you didn’t want to be teased then he’d give you everything you wanted. One of his hands comes up under his chin now, a finger pressing into your tight entrance as his tongue works to lap at your clit, your folds, even dipping into you whenever his finger pulls all the way out.
A second finger slides into you while his attention focuses back to making out with your clit. You can’t keep track of the way he alternates between kissing and licking at you while his fingers push in as deep as he can get them. “So good, Baby.” Baby. It comes out of you by force of habit and it makes him twitch in his boxes. If you weren’t so drunk on him you probably would have started overthinking but he’s making sure your focus is on nothing else but his mouth for now. Carmen’s chin is slick with everything you’re giving him as he eats you out as if he’s a dying man and this is his last source of solace in the world.
“C’mon Honey.” He’s cooing against you, fingers crooked just how he knows you like it. There’s sloppy licks being delivered to your clit as his fingers pump in and out. His hand finally leaves it’s grip on your ass to apply a gentle pressure to the top of your mound, pressing down against the flesh to add yet another sensation. “Can feel how tight you’re getting. You wanna come for me so bad, don’t you? Be good for me.” 
Your hands fist around Carmen’s hair, hips rocking up against him and it doesn’t take long for an orgasm to wash over your body. You seize up at the feeling, thighs clamping around Carmen’s head as he licks you through it. He’s only giving you a moment to recover when you feel his fingers slide out of your sensitive body and he can’t help but go back to licking out the mess you’ve made.
“Gonna fuckin’ kill me, Carmen.”
He’s smirking against you but taking the hint. Your thighs shaking as he pulls back from under your skirt, taking a moment to appreciate the handiwork that was the bruises covering your thighs while you take a moment to recover. The way your pussy looks so pretty covered in the mixture of your arousal and his spit. Carmen can’t help himself but to swirl his thumb around your clit, your hips jolting up as you reach out to grab ahold of his wrist. “Need a minute please.” 
Carmen nods and stands up, wasting no time making work of unbuckling his belt. You collect your thoughts well enough to start unbuttoning his jeans for him, letting your fingers linger on his jean clad hardened length. “You, uh -” You won’t meet his eye, opting instead to start pulling his pants down his toned thighs. “You still okay not using a condom?” A roundabout way of saying ‘I’m clean, are you?’. Carmen nods as if it’s the most insane question in the world. Even if he’s not with you anymore, it’s still only you for him for as long as he can see coming. “No one but you.”
You can’t meet his eye, a wave of guilt washing over you concerning your earlier date with Jonanthan that quickly gets pushed away when Carmy grabs ahold of your jaw and brings you in for a haphazard kiss. Mindless, heavenly kissing. The two of you getting lost in the way your tongues know just how to navigate one another while your hand slides into his boxes and begins lazily 
“Gotta fuck you or I’m gonna cum on your hand like a fuckin’ teenager.” You giggle into his mouth but slide yourself off the counter nonetheless. Giving him one more tender kiss before turning around to bend yourself over the counter. It’s not the most gracious process but you’re tugging your shirt over your head on the way down, pitching it somewhere else to deal with later. 
He’s looking at every inch of you. Underwear still pulled to the side, the way the lace of your bra looks against your back. Memorizing every detail he possibly can just in case you wise up and stop letting him come over to defile you like this at night. 
Carmen is dragging the head of his cock through your folds, tapping it against your clit while you whine and rut back against him. The weight of his jeans and belt resting heavy against his ankles and keeping him grounded enough to not spill his load before he even makes it inside of you. You weren’t used to taking him all the time anymore, a thought Carmen can’t dwell on, so he goes inch by inch and gives you time to adjust to the girth of him. He was thicker than anyone you’d been with before and every random hookup together lately reminds you of the first time you felt him stretch you out. 
It burns in the best way possible and he’s so tender while you get adjusted. Waiting until you start fucking yourself against his length to take that as his sign you were finally ready for him. Carmen still starts slow, a teasing pace of pulling himself nearly all the way out before sinking right back in. “Pussy’s like heaven.” It makes you oddly proud to hear him call that out. To know you still have an affect on him after all this time.
“Think about fuckin’ you all the time.” He’s picking up speed now, “Think about how good you feel stretched around me. Such a good slut for me, aren’t you? Bending over and practically begging for it.” His words, once again, make your head spin. It was a common theme with Carmen. Your fingers lace in your own hair, desperate to grab ahold of something. “Always wanting you to fuck me, Carm. Dream about how good you make me feel.” Like you two were meant to fit together perfectly. 
There’s a lewd clapping noise coming from the way your ass smacks against his frame with each deep thrust. Eventually your arms give out, torso falling flat against the shockingly still cool countertop while Carmen fucks into you for all he’s worth. A firm slap is being delivered to your ass that causes you to yelp out, rolling your hips back against him at the same time as an act of encouragement. 
His mind is taken up with how good you feel. You’re perfectly stretched around him and leaking out around his base. So wet, so beautiful, so perfect. There’s a hand sliding up your back until it’s fisting around your hair, gently tugging at it and the new sensation has these pornstar worthy moans escaping you. Your loud and needy brain is completely empty as Carmen destroys you the way he knows how. 
“D’you think about me fucking you while you were sitting across from some asshole all night? Poor little pussy almost got fucked by someone who doesn’t know how to treat it.” His words are so casually spoken with just the right amount of bite that it’s causing your brain to melt. Jonathan didn’t stand a chance of getting within two feet of your panties, just another mindless date in your series of attempted ways to ‘get over Carmen’ which clearly wasn’t going well. He bottoms out in you, every inch of his length pressed as firmly as he can into your core. It’s so much, so full and he’s got you pinned in place. Unable to do anything but be used by him, just how you both know you love to be. “Or did you go just to make me jealous? Put on your slutty little panties and went to dinner knowing you’d text me to come fuck you tonight.” 
He’s grinding his hips into you on the impossible quest to get even deeper. It’s possessive, claiming, and you’d probably even be a little annoyed by his behavior if you were in a better state of mind. For now you’re bent over the counter with bruises blooming all over your thighs and enjoying an odd jealous streak coming from someone who, technically, has no right to be jealous. It’s making you feel dizzy and your heart throb and your pussy clenching around him. “You gonna keep talking or you gonna fuck me, Carm? ‘Cause if not I’ll call him to finish the job.” 
You liked riling him up. 
Another sharp smack is being dealt to your ass when Carmen starts to pick the pace back up. His hands are tight on your hips and his pace is brutal. There’s grunts coming from behind you that are making your head spin and if you were more coherent you’d be a bit more embarrassed about the drool sliding from the corner of your mouth as your boyfrie-….. Well, as Carmen takes care of you. He’s admiring the bloom of his handprint on your skin, brushing his hand along it before pressing firmly down to help soothe the buzzing sting of pain. 
He wasn’t fucking you as often, didn’t have you nearly as well trained anymore. These bi-weekly meetings are not doing nearly enough for your body. He used to be able to fuck you right through an orgasm and you’d keep going. So used to him working your oversensitive clit to his liking. Now you whine while grabbing his wrist and whimper out pleas for him to give you a few minutes. He hates not knowing your body as well as he used to even if he still knows you pretty damn well.
So when he feels you getting closer, he’s taking note. Keeping his pace exactly the same and letting his hand crash down against the tender flesh of your ass again. “You gonna give me another? C’mon, Honey. Can feel how bad you need it.” And you do. God you need every orgasm you’re lucky enough to get from him. 
Your hips buck and twitch and you let out a series of uncontrolled moans as your orgasm starts to wash over your body. If Carmen wasn’t between your legs then your thighs would have snapped shut while your toes curled and your heart started beating faster. You could practically hear it beating in your own ears. “S’good, so good. Thank you, thank you. Shit, thank you.” A mess but you couldn’t judge yourself. 
Carmen’s pulling out when he’s close after just a few more strokes, frantically jerking off his length to keep the sensation going. You’re rolling your hips back and riding out the waves of your own orgasm, glancing back over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of Carmen with his head tossed back and brows knitted together in concentration. “Come on me, Baby. Wanna feel every drip on my skin. Maybe I’ll let you take a picture of it dripping down all the pretty bruises you gave me.” 
That’s all it takes for him to come undone. Warm spurts of cum landing along your back, your thighs, some of it dripping down your folds. The feeling is pulling wanton moans from your mouth that send Carmen into orbit. God, he doesn’t want to come back down to Earth. Collecting his breath and trying to keep himself upright while the aftershocks of his orgasm wrack through his body. How was he supposed to stay away from you when it felt like this? Especially when you just kept calling him baby.
He stopped cumming inside of you since the breakup. It made sense, kinda. But you hated it. Felt like a waste even though you wouldn’t overstep and ask for him to go back to finishing inside of you. He would, by the way. Without a second thought he’d bury himself in until he couldn’t go any further and fuck his cum into you as deep as possible. 
You feel a finger swiping up some of his cum off your backside and soon enough it’s pressed to your lips. Without a second thought you take the digit into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it while licking him clean. He wants some of it inside of you one way or another. A subtle way of still putting his claim on you.
The two of you take a moment to recover after Carmen pops his finger out of your mouth. His hands are running a circuit up and down the side of your thighs and torso, still enjoying the view of your body relaxed against the counter in front of him. The tile was starting to become painful as your stomach bent over it but you couldn’t bring yourself to move just yet. You didn’t fully trust your legs to support your weight without the counter for support. 
Carmen’s rustling around behind you now. Reaching down to pull up just his boxes but kick his jeans the rest of the way off finally. He’s not ready for the stimulation of such a heavy material against his sensitive skin yet. There’s a clattering from the sink area as he retrieves another towel to get wet for you and a cup to fill with water. Your eyes feel heavy. Mind’s at ease having Carmen around again, not that you’ll admit it, and your body feeling languid after being fucked so well. 
There’s a glass of water being sat in front of you. “Drink.” So you prop yourself up on your elbows and nurse small sips of the water while the cool rag gets to work wiping down your backside from the mess he made. His fingers ghost along the tender flesh of your ass where he was spanking, “Feeling alright?” You hum into the cup, giving him a small waggle of your behind to reassure any concerns he had. 
He gets you cleaned up in silence, letting the both of you enjoy the simple moment. Carmen always prided himself on taking care of you. There’s warm hands, still damp from cleaning you up, rubbing up the sides of your torso before wrapping around the tops of your shoulders. His hips rub along your backside and you just feel so warm, so safe like this. “We gotta get you to bed.”
You just sigh and scrub your hands over your face. A beat of silence passes while you collect your thoughts. “Carm, I don’t think I can stand up.” Your legs are still slightly shaking and your mind has yet to catch up with your body. 
Laughter’s coming from behind you as he delivers a playful swat to your ass. “C’mon I’ll get you there.” This feels so simple. You find yourself questioning why the two of you even broke up to begin with when the good moments were this good. Easy, content, safe. Would you ever be able to find this again? Would he? 
He’s grabbing ahold of your waist while pulling you back into his chest. Your head falls back against his shoulder and Carmen allows his lips to once again find your exposed neck. A series of gentle kisses being placed as his arms snake tighter around your body. “Still feeling okay?” You let out a content hum and allow yourself to be held by him. “Feel better than I have all week. Thank you, Carm.” You feel him smile against your skin as he places another delicate kiss. “Always.”
The two of you stay intertwined until Carmen starts to encourage the shuffle towards your bedroom. He makes sure you get cleaned up and ready for bed. Brings you one of your sleep shirts while you brush your teeth and tries to not overthink when you offer him a toothbrush of his own because you just so happened to have an extra. Gives you privacy when you complain about needing to pee and you find it odd there’s a tug at your chest when he ducked out of the room. Part of you hated being that couple who left the door open or used the restroom while the other showered, yadda yadda. It was a sign of comfort and the door being pulled shut behind Carmen was a sign that comfort was long gone. 
Not that you cared. Totally didn’t care at all. 
He’s going to just tuck you in at first until you’re clutching at his frame and pulling him into bed next to you. Carmen never could say no when it came to you, especially when he feels his back sinking into your soft bed and your warm body curling up along his side. He should go. Get home before it’s too late and try to get some sleep. He’s already planning on getting to work early to avoid having too much free time to think about tonight in detail. 
But his clothes feel so far away and the long day is starting to finally hit him. You can practically hear him thinking over his options and your breathing starts skipping as you feel him begin to pull away. 
“Carmen.” Your grip on his chest tightens and it pulls directly at his heart. Since this whole… Situation started he never stayed the night when your meetings would run this late. Always picking his clothes up out of piles on the floor and mumbling something about needing to get home to get stuff together from work. You never asked him to stay anyway. Neither of you knew if that would make an already weird and complicated situation even worse. 
But tonight was different. 
There were hints of a storm in the distance you start telling yourself. If you focused you could hear thunder, somewhere, out there and you just wanted Carmen safe for his sake. That’s all. So you pathetically cling to him and hope you don’t kick yourself out of embarrassment in the morning. It takes just a moment of him looking down at you to understand what you can’t say and he’s giving you a little nod in response. His arms wrap around your shoulders, leaning in to press a kiss to the top of your head. Kissing every inch of you had to be one of his greatest pleasures in life.
“Remind me to season that skillet in the morning.” 
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
Carmen, shockingly, sleeps through the night. The warmth of your body next to him coupled with your excellent sleeping experience. A comfortable bed with good pillows, a white noise machine in the corner of your room (the ice maker in the fridge at Carmy’s would constantly go off so you got used to sleeping with background noise to cover it up), it was the best night of rest he’s had in months.
Your sheets smell like home. 
He’s slowly waking up now and his first thought is how much he misses the weight of your breast in his hand. Second thought is how much he needs to pee but damn your bed is comfortable. 
Carmen allows his body to wake up slowly. Stretching his arms out above his head and letting out a satisfied grunt at the feeling of his well rested muscles. Blinking his eyes awake just enough to take in the sight of all the trinkets and items that covered your space. There’s some things he notices that he knows for a fact he purchased you. Bottles of perfume, books you keep telling yourself you need to read, cups you constantly forget to bring back into the kitchen until you’re fully out of them.
Did you keep any of the pictures? Photo strips from Navy Pier and the holiday market at Wrigley Field. Everything from the disposable camera you brought along on road trips and vacations. The polaroids that once littered a cork board in your living room that the two of you added pictures to so often. If he looked around enough would he find them tucked away safely in a box or did you pitch them when you knew the two of you were through. 
Carmen still has one. You took most of them while you packed up your things from his place and refused to let him carry any of the boxes downstairs. So stubborn, so full of hurt pride. He just spent most of the day trying to stand out of your way but always available in case you finally admitted that you needed help. Maybe a small part of him hoped that as you packed up so many memories it would trigger a ‘What are we doing?’ reaction and you’d go running into his arms. 
You never did. 
But you did take one trip down to your car with an overstuffed Ikea bag over your shoulder and balancing a box on your hip. Carmen knew he didn’t have long, and it kind of felt like stealing, but he rushed over to the box you just started packing up and rifles through the photos as fast as he possibly could. It took a moment of digging before there it was. A polaroid photo someone took of the two of you on New Year’s Eve. You’re wearing some cheesy headband and he has those tacky sunglasses on that show off the incoming year on them. His arms are wrapped low around your waist as he stands behind you, one of your hands resting on top of his while the other is reaching up and back to cup his jaw. You’re both grinning and laughing in the photos and nothing bad has happened yet. 
He hears you shuffling back up the stairs so he’s quickly throwing the box back together after sliding the photo into his pocket and rushing back to stand in the kitchen. Acting like nothing was happening. You didn’t even look over at him so it wasn’t like he had to put up much of a show anway.
It’s still safely tucked into his wallet. 
The sound of the front door opening and hushed whispers are finally pulling him from his half asleep, reflective state. It looks like this day is getting started if he wants it to or not. He’s tilting his head to press it into the pillow underneath him, allowing one last deep inhale to remind himself exactly what your scent smells like before forcing his body to be pushed out of your bed.
Carmen turns the corner in just his boxer briefs and you’re not convinced you aren’t still dreaming because fuck he looks good. His hair’s a mess from the combination of you playing with it all night and him sleeping so well. One of his hands is scratching low on his hips while he takes in the sight of you in the kitchen. 
Maybe he shouldn’t be so comfortable walking around your apartment half dressed still but God is this relationship situation getting messier since the day since the two of you reconnected.
“Ordered some breakfast from Yolk. Figured you were hungry and I’m sure you have to run off this morning but I uh-…. I just wanted to make sure you were fed.” You nod to yourself. Giving him an out as you start popping open food boxes. There was just over an hour until you had to get to work too so there were multiple excuses possible for this morning to end as early as it needed to. 
In an odd, roundabout, time to head back to therapy kind of way it almost feels like you’re dating your ex. 
“Yeah.” He nods to himself and desperately wishes he had deodorant, cologne, fuck even Axe body spray. Something to make himself smell better or feel more presentable for you. “Richie actually tried installing fuckin’ bidets to the toilets last night. Kept on running his mouth about how prestigious they are and he, obviously, doesn’t know how to install bidets. So the bathrooms are a little-“ He waves his hands through the air.
“Shitty?” 
Second questionable pun you’ve made lately. Pull it together. 
There’s a breathy little laugh coming out, “Yeah, shitty.” Carmen’s peeking over your shoulder as you plate up breakfast, sneaking a piece of bacon from under your arm before pressing a kiss to the top of your ear. “Thank you for ordering this.” 
You nod and try to pretend you didn’t stop breathing having him so close to you under the soft morning light. 
He leaves $60 tucked under a vase on your dining table to cover breakfast. 
————
11:52 am
[DO NOT ANSWER]: Richie put his foot down and we’re stuck getting the bidets 
[DO NOT ANSWER]: If you’re wondering how my day is going 
12:17 pm
Shockingly my day is much less toilet related. I hope it’s going well. 
4:39 pm 
[DO NOT ANSWER]: I know so much about bathrooms now
————
You laugh a little too loud as the alert illuminates your phone. There’s a fond tugging at your heart as the ‘normal’ conversations fills your chat history instead of the short “My place tn” or “I still can’t find my jacket. You have to have it”. Maybe saving him as do not answer seemed too harsh but having his contact show up as a photo of you two cuddled up with the Chicago skyline in the background, an innocent and horrifically cheesy “Baby Boy 💙” contact name modeled after Richie saying you baby him too much one night. Every time it flashed across your screen and Richie saw he gave you guys an endless amount of shit. It became a constant bit that none of you got tired of at the time. 
You were trying to separate yourself from your past with him as much as possible at first but now those lines just keep getting more and more blurred. 
One of your coworkers grabs your attention away from your phone thus leaving Carmen’s message on read. He tries to pretend it doesn’t bother him as he gets to work prepping for tonight’s service. Who wants to talk about bathrooms with their… Fuck buddy? Ex? God that’s still so weird to say. 
‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
Your mind was haunted by thoughts of Carmen Berzatto all day. 
No matter how many busy tasks you assigned yourself he always seemed to creep back in. You’d look around for him when a joke landed well at work and the group you were with erupted into laughter. Could easily picture his head thrown back as he scrubs over his face in an attempt to muffle the sound. When you were standing alone your mind wandered off to the way he treated you last night. So claiming. Expertly working your body the way only he could after so much time of getting to know it. 
The bed feels so much 
You throw the blanket away from your frame and watch as it bundles up beside you. Is this crazy? It feels crazy. You shake out the nerves, fluffing up your shorts and primping yourself for the photo. It takes one, two, seven pictures to get just the right angle. An image of your thighs against the bedding and your oversized sleep shorts bunched up all the way down your legs. Taking a deep breath you steel your spine and pull up Carmen’s contact.
————
11:28 pm 
Headed to bed 
ONE IMAGE ATTACHED
11:29 pm 
[DO NOT ANSWER]: Fuck.
11:31 pm
Goodnight Carmen <3
2:12 am
[DO NOT ANSWER]: Can’t stop thinking about you 
ONE VIDEO ATTACHED
————
The sun is warm against your skin as it slowly wakes you up. There’s an air purifier rattling in the corner that acts half as white noise while you sleep, half to soak up the smells of Chicago. Sometimes when Carmen’s especially exhausted you have to bring out the big boy and ask your Google home to play sleep sounds to mask him snoring all night. You typically didn’t mind the sound, knowing it’s a sign of just how badly he needed a good night’s rest. 
You’re fishing your phone out of the comforter in a haste to click off the horrific sound of the alarm and your eyes are barely open when you see the alert. A preview image popping up and you can just barely a blurry image of - “Holy fuck!” 
Your free hand flies up to clamp over your mouth as a mix of gasps and ‘no fucking way’ come out of you with zero control. With shaking hands you open up the video, half tempted to pinch yourself with a video of Carmen fills your screen. His hand rubbing over the bulge in his boxers and there’s a mess of shaky breathing coming from behind the phone. You can’t get the volume turned all the way up fast enough and you’re terrified to miss a single sound. 
And there he is. 
Fishing his cock out of his boxers and stroking himself for you. Illuminated by the lamp on his bedside table and his hand over lubricated to mimic how wet you get for him. He’s a mess of filthy moans, bucking hips, are you dreaming? 
The combination of the sun beating in and the way this video is making your body go hot is too much. You’re overheating, kicking the blankets away from you while your hand goes into your shorts on instinct. Toying with your clit even though you don’t have much time to spare as you watch Carmen get off for you.
————
8:04 am
HEART REACTED TO A VIDEO
Mine tonight?
Fuck you sound so good
Wish I would have been there to clean you up
Say my name more next time please
How am I supposed to go to work now 
————
No response. You aren’t surprised, he’s typically busy in the morning. 
So you go along your day and let yourself enjoy the thought of Carmen coming back over tonight to take care of you. You had thought letting him back in was a risky move but things seemed fine so far. Settling into the new version of what normal was going to look like. Maybe things would end up being some version of alright after all. 
A chirp from your phone catches your attention and you’re instantly uninvested in whatever task was at hand. It might be a little pathetic how excited you were but that is besides the point. 
————
10:32 am 
[CARMEN]: Busy tonight
————
Busy tonight? Go fuck yourself Carmen! 
You waited all morning and THAT’S the response you get? Were the multiple texts too much? Did you come off too clingy? Sure he just stayed the night, was two times in one week where he drew the line? 
So you leave him on read and take away the heart from his video. Change his name back to DO NOT ANSWER and instantly feel the urge to get off tonight leaving your body. Replaced by a subtle anger that only he can bring out of you. 
The workday seems to go by so much quicker as you have this internal argument with yourself and mentally pick a battle with Carmen. Maybe you were silly to think things would… What? Go back to the way they were? No, of course not. 
Ugh!
Carmen who, by the way, truly was slammed. Got stuck hosting an event for an old family friend that he barely knew but was convinced it’d be good for business. He’s overwhelmed by work and anxious with his relationship with you. The breakup was horrific. One of the worst things he’s had to experience so far which certainly says a lot. At the very least - It made sense. This though? Sleeping together, fucking when you have shitty dates and he’s your second choice for the night, taking pictures of dumb things he sees during the day because it made him think of you but never actually sending them, it made zero sense.
If only there was something the two of you could do to figure this whole mess out. 
But alas.
You bring home a salad that’s far healthier than anything you’ve eaten all week accompanied by some fresh pressed green juice nonsense you lie to yourself and mentally say is delicious. The boy detox starts now. 
The shower you take that night must last an hour. Every inch of your body gets scrubbed, your face and hair both get a mixture of treatments and masks. You primp and polish yourself up and convince yourself that this is all for you and not so you look better than ever and Carmen will have to regret his stupid and shitty ‘Busy tonight’ text because you were also just like so, so busy and -
Fuck Carmen Berzatto. 
You decide you could go the rest of your life without hearing from him and be just fine. It was his loss. You’re funny, beautiful, and excellent in the bedroom. There’s thousands of people out there dreaming about finding someone like you!
This internal argument keeps going. And you know what’s annoying? The second you fling yourself into bed you realize he left his scent all over your sheets still. It hasn’t gone away - Cologne mixed with Carmen. And you 100% aren’t hunting out the scent nor are you hunting out a reason to stay annoyed with him. Not at all. So you get back out of bed and grab the fabric freshener to spray your sheets back down with, giving it a minute to dry before falling face first into the mattress with an annoyed huff. 
So yeah, fuck him. You hope you never hear from him again and toss your phone on the other side of the bed. Forcing your eyes shut and making your mind go blank because otherwise you’ll stew all night thus continuing this Carmen induced spiral. 
————
1:47 am
[DO NOT ANSWER]: Hey
————
Fuck.
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