#I can’t stop thinking about severance
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S2 EP3 SPOILERS!!—
are they… are they making severed people for the military…
#war names for the files#well at least cold Harbor#the green card Dylan stole in s1 being probably transported to that fuckass “’exportation zone”’#this would relate to the truck incident from the email#and compartmentalizing negative emotions could be a way to make efficient soldiers???#I’m not good at theories but the thought of mark making his own wife an obedient Lumon slave/soldier is crazy#but also it might be too big of a tone shift for the show for it to actually be the case#i can’t stop thinking about severance#severance#severance apple tv#severance spoilers
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nicky and aaron: when andrew’s on his meds he’s unhinged, but you haven’t seen him when he’s sober! he’s so much worse
andrew off his meds: *has clinical depression*
nicky and aaron: he’s craaazy
#I can’t stop thinking about nicky saying andrew is soulless when he’s off his meds#and andrew’s just like. showing symptoms of severe depression and ptsd#like bestie…#when neil said is anyone else calls andrew soulless he’ll have to fight them#I get it neil. I get it#andrew minyard#aaron minyard#nicky hemmick#aftg#andreil#tfc#all for the game#the foxhole court
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inspired by a tiktok that i will come back and link when i'm not at work anymore lol
edit: big thanks to the 18-hour tiktok propaganda "ban" for reminding me that i never came back and linked the tiktok (here it is)
Midway through December, Eddie’s publishing house puts on a holiday party at their HQ all the way in NYC.
Okay – all the way might be a little dramatic. New York isn’t too far a haul from where Eddie and Steve put down roots in Massachusetts, but with three hellions under the age of seven, anything outside of their typical routine is a stretch.
They’re making it work though – anything for an opportunity to get some childless time together – and they’ve got Robin and Nancy watching the girls so they can stay overnight in the city, and they’re getting all dolled up too (Steve is wearing an enormous cableknit sweater with a turtleneck underneath and, seriously, Eddie had no idea that many layers could still be that fucking hot until he met Steve).
Normally Eddie wouldn’t give a shit (he likes to bring a kind of come as you are type of vibe to the function, typically), but he’s actually looking forward to an evening spent wearing clothes that aren’t covered in snot and craft glitter and food.
He’s wearing these dark grey plaid trousers and he’s got a silk-ish black button-down on over a black undershirt, tucked in and unbuttoned simultaneously, and he’s topping it all off with a positively ancient leather jacket that he’s had for longer than he can even remember.
He looks pretty fuckin’ snazzy, if he’d say so himself.
Eddie is putting the finishing touches on his look – selecting the perfect assortment of rings and chains – when the door pushes open and his four-year-old, Robbie, enters the room.
Robbie pulls a confused kind of face as she looks him up and down.
Eddie furrows his eyebrows.
“What’s that look for?”
Robbie’s still got her nose all scrunched up as she says, “What happened to you?”
And now Eddie is offended because he actually thinks he looks pretty great, thanks, and he could do without judgement from his pre-schooler (who still gets dressed with her shirt on backwards half the time, just for the record).
“Amelia Robin, you cannot be serious.”
“What happened to you?” she repeats.
“Oh, you’re gonna double down on that?”
Robbie doesn’t even bother responding, just skitters back out from whence she came or whatever. He can hear Robin just behind him trying not to laugh.
“Did you tell her to say that?” he asks her, because it’s far from outside the realm of possibility.
“I swear on all that is holy I didn’t,” she snickers, “That was totally her.”
Eddie sighs.
“Y’know, Steve’s got all this big talk about oh, she’s you, Ed, she’s just like you,” Eddie says, his voice going all high and mocking, “But that – that was pure Steve.”
They head downstairs not too long later where Steve is walking Nancy through the insane binder he stores all of the girls' info in.
“Hey,” Steve says, a grin growing on his face, “Look at you.”
“Eugh,” Robin groans, “Can you guys leave already and be gross outside my line of sight.”
“You look good as hell,” Steve ignores her as he tugs just a little on the hem of Eddie’s coat.
“Can you tell your daughter that, please.”
#robin has received several Talks already about not laughing when the girls misbehave#steve: it makes it really hard to get them to stop if they think it’s funny#robin: it is funny tho#steve: *i* know that. we can’t let them know that we know.#liv’s steddie dads verse#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie dads
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Can we talk about Ms Casey instantly clueing into Burt and Irving’s interest in each other? To our knowledge, she only ever saw them interact once outside the wellness room, and when Irving mentioned to Mark that he wanted to seek Burt’s counsel.
It’s obvious to us, the viewers, their interest, but is it to someone who’s only “lived” for 100+ hours and only ever interacts with people through therapy?
On top of this, her encouragement by telling Irving that Burt was in the conference room, that seemed impulsive and almost somewhat defiant. A glimpse of humanity breaking through the carefully structured facade that’s been placed upon her. Love transcends severance.
#I want to explore my thoughts more in a later post but I’m at work on my lunch break so I can’t now#I just can’t stop thinking about that detail#she speaks#severance#ms casey#irving b#Burt g#burving
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I found an intro clip where Kenshi calls him Johnny and now I’m gonna cling to it unreasonably
#johnny cage#kenshi takahashi#johnny x kenshi#johnshi#mk1#mortal kombat 1#you know I can’t stop thinking up a ‘he called me johnny’ moment#I’m severely unokay about them
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🛗💧🏃🧠🐐?
#severance#severance fanart#mark scout#mark s#lumon industries#I can’t stop thinking about this show#so obsessed I’m dreaming about it at night lmao
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Irvs final call to Dylan to ‘hang in there’. Irv telling Dylan not to get distracted by the propaganda. Irv reminding Dylan why they’re doing this in the first place. Irv asking Dylan to continue their mission, even if he won’t be there to help anymore.
#severance spoilers#severance#severance season 2#dylan g#irving b#rambling words but I can’t stop thinking about this
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being a fan of false/ren/both atm is kinda weird and surreal in these times because you have to carefully tread around in your mind to avoid thinking about upsetting things (which consist of like 50% of the total stuff in your head) and you have to rewire your longtime neural pathways but it’s necessary and doable lol
#the friend group.#took a look at my drafts on main and the stuff i had painstakingly saved/ written… idk what to do with it so im just not doing anything#every time i see someone go ‘oh those two didn’t really interact with anyone else im on the server’ im sitting here with gritted teeth.#but no surprises people never gave a shit#it feels weird. esp as a false watcher.#like to explain to the hermitcraft fans it’s like what happened to the sbi fans when wilbur came out as a piece of shit. but less severe.#i do think a lot of people stopped giving a shit about iskall after hc6 so they automatically ignored everything he did#i think it’s actually insane because as a false/ren/both viewer you can’t just fucking pretend things never happened#it’s been one year since hc10 started 🙂 and things have changed 🙂#there’s no way people have forgotten HOW hc10 started and all the. stuff. that i now don’t look at.#i am fine i am either diassociating or narrowing my scope but it’s still ??????#anywayssss this was prob make lifeseriesifcation worse and false is the only non lifer hermit woman yayyyyy this can’t go wrong yayyy#i do think it’s nice that we don’t know what ren thinks about this like yesss none of our business#can’t wait for more ignorance from the fandom yippee#iskall situation#discourse#salt#ria.txt#ppl celebrating hc10 woohoo new hermits yeah and im over here trying not to think about it. i am not thinking about 90% of it.
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would love to sit down with chidi anagonye and watch severance together. I just know he’d be so horrified
#the moral and ethical implications of every single detail in that show#helly r trying to kill herself might actually kill HIM#ugh I can’t stop thinking about it#severance#the good place#tgp#chidi anagonye
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HELLY WAS NEVER CRUEL
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Voltron severance au where shiro matt and sam are taken hostage by lumon (or I guess galra) hunk, pidge, lance and keith are the macrodata refinement team and allura is the wellness director and maybe lotor as cobel? Wait I’m cooking
#voltron legendary queerbait#voltron legendary disaster#voltron#severance#I can’t stop thinking about severance#and I’ve been obsessed with klance since I developed a conscience
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NO YOU DONT GET IT S2 OF JUNO STEEL IS ALL ABOUT HOW PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE ALWAYS AND PEOPLE DO BAD THINGS WITH GOOD INTENTIONS AND THAT DOESNT MAKE IT OKAY BUT IT DOESNT MAKE THEM MONSTERS AND YOU DONT EVER HAVE TO FORGIVE THEM FOR IT BUT YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT THEY DIDNT DO IT JUST BECAUSE THEY WERE EVIL TO AVOID MAKING THOSE SAME MISTAKES AND AHHHHHHH SKDJEJSKSKFNRNRISKCB RJCOKCNDJFIDJSNNFJCIFJDODODKWNALSPCJJRNRJDJDNDBEKSODN
#typing this post out almost made my tumblr crash#anyway i have had to take a break from listening several times due to the emotions it’s making me feel and i’m going crazy#thank you for your time#juno steel#junoverse#the penumbra podcast#tpp#tpp s2#tpp season 2#this is the second post i’ve made like this#but i just can’t stop thinking about it
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the thing i keep coming back to with this severance ep is that. irving went out choosing real genuine human connection over the manufactured connection he used to have with “kier’s greater purpose”. despite lumon trying to beat the love out of him, he chose love. and in that moment he became useless to the capitalist machine. because he showed his humanity. he showed that he valued something more highly than lumon. than kier. than his place as a cog in the capitalist machine. and most importantly he showed it is possible to fucking scare them. because if irving b alone can threaten the future ceo of lumon, imagine what they can do together. and THAT’S why they killed him. the jackboot only jumps down on people standing up etc.
#severance spoilers#and i can’t stop thinking about how early season 1 irving would have REVERED helena#but in that moment she was just the cruel woman who had taken away his friend helly#and he fucking DESPISED her for it#augggghhhh
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fucking hell i hate being sick so much
#marzivents#before the autoimmune shit being sick was annoying but i could get through it#it was fine. i didn’t like it but it was always over in like 2-3 days#i wouldn’t even miss school unless i was running a noticeable fever#(though by high school i kinda stopped checking)#now though? being sick is so much more treacherous than before#i have to rest so much. log this symptom manage that symptom keep your doctors updated#don’t stress out too bad! don’t wanna trigger a flareup#it’s scary. a cold could land me in the hospital if i’m not careful#plus. the symptoms of a cold feel a lot worse when your autoimmune flareups start like colds#it’s just the worst. am i gonna have to spend the rest of my life afraid of the common cold#how the fuck do i go about being immunosuppressed without developing germaphobia#i know that in a year or two this will feel normal and i’ll be used to it#but right now it’s still new and it’s so so frightening#it feels like everyone is sick all of the time. at any given point in time 2 of my friends have some sort of cold#this winter season has been especially abysmal#but even before then. several folks i knew had walking pneumonia in the summer#there’s all these outbreaks always happening. it’s terrifying#plus there’s the inconveniences of missed class time#i don’t want to miss school. i like school. i want to go and learn and get my degree#but i have to rest so i can’t go to class which fucks up my grades which stresses me out#which makes me more likely to get sick later! it’s fucking awful#i dunno. i need to go to bed i think. i’m just… stressed and tired and sick of it
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I got back home recently and indulgently used my Durge and Wyll for warm ups
#bg3#bg3 durge#wyll ravengard#bg3 wyll#1) again it was like midnight when I drew these and forgot to look up his horn shape please ignore that#2) I watched several playthroughs on slay the princess and it AWOKE something in me it ENLIGHTENED me#something something monstrous hero and the princess who’s a monster something#it just unlocked something in my brain I saw the light I now can’t stop thinking about wyll and durge sorry#im sharing these now bc idk if I’ll ever actually clean these up lol#my artwork
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using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.
#but jesus christ coming back home while already knee deep in a suicidal episode was an awful idea#like i was maybe on the verge of improving and then i came back to all of this family bullshit#and the place as well like it’s so. i don’t want to say isolated necessarily. but so much it’s own little bubble#and i spent the last eight or nine years i lived here depressed and the last six suicidal#and being back here feels like the actual place is telling me to die#and i don’t think it helps that every place i go i know or know of someone who successfully committed suicide#like. oh this person drowned themself here. or that person hung themself in these woods. or several people jumped off the side of this clif#like. it all feels like reminders of my failures. and it’s like. cmon. wouldn’t it be easy. all you need to do is jump. is slit your throat#is find a decent piece of rope. idk. but everything is so much and i just want it to stop and it feels like the ground itself#is giving me a way to do it.#i genuinely feel like i’m like 16 or 17 again. and everything that isn’t within these hills#feels like a haze and not actually real. like the concept of buxton doesn’t actually exist and my friends do not actually exist and nothing#actually exists except the place i’m in and my family and the pub#i think going back to work at the pub was a mistake; i think it’s making this worse. especially because it’s henry’s dad’s local#and where henry’s wake was. and nothing there has changed at all. it’s like the whole last year never happened.#and i only need to get through two more days but it feels like an impossible task and i keep thinking being back in york will fix me but id#if that even true like. i was suicidal before i left. and it’s going to be intense and stressful and then i have to leave again.#come back here and do three full weeks of this all over again. i haven’t even managed two yet this time around. and i feel like#such a failure and such a drain on my friends (and on one in particular) because it just#is so much and has been so long and everything is complicated and awful and i think if i hadn’t come back i’d be in a normal mental state#by now. that’s the worst fucking part. and also the whole thing of i know how to be suicidal here. i know how to not give a shit about#living here. i know how to do that. but ive never had to try before. like im trying to improve and im trying to hold on and hold off the#urges to kill myself or self harm or whatever because i said i would and because i KNOW it can be better than this and bc i love my friends#and they love me and i don’t want to upset them or make them anxious or anything like that and kat made me promise to try and im trying so#fucking hard and it feels like it’s not even worth the effort because it’s so much effort and everything is so overwhelming and awful and i#hate the way my family interacts and i just want everything to stop and idc if suicide is the cowards way out or selfish or whatever#bullshit people say it feels like the only option i can actually withstand because everything is so much pain and so much effort and so muc#everything and i can’t deal with it anymore. and also i forgot just how much i have to fucking mask in front of my parents and especially m#father and it’s so exhausting and i can’t sleep and there’s so much yelling and i just need it all to stop#i’ve had major breakdowns the last 3 nights about wanting to die so much & trying so hard to not let myself & idk how much longer i can tak
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