#I can’t find the magazines I saw these in as a kid where they were all cool looking with Christmas village atmosphere

[vampyre-merrow]

[wilwheaton]

Hey Wil, this is out of left field, but you’ve done some work that might have been dubbed into other languages.

Have you ever viewed anything you’ve done in a dubbed version? I can’t imagine what it’s like watching yourself on screen, but it’s got to be pretty trippy to watch yourself performing with a stranger’s voice coming out.

Just wondered. Hope you’re having a great day. Please give Marlowe & Watson scritches from me. 💜

Oh my god. Yes. I have one story and WOW is it weird.

So, in the early 90s, when TNG was dubbed for Germany, the actor they cast to voice Wesley made this choice (or was directed) to be obnoxiously whiny. Like, it could not have been more wrong for the character, and farther away from my performance. This person made Wesley a bratty, whiny, snotty kid. Like, WOW, did they fundamentally change how German audiences experienced this character.

I had no idea, because in the early 90s, the world was bigger than it is today. But I saw LOTS of letters and comments in magazines (and on Usenet) from Trekkies in Germany who fucking HATED Wesley with a firey passion that was even more intense than the way protoincels hated him in America. I didn't understand why, specifically in Germany, he was so despised.

Fast forward to ... I want to say 2011? Maybe 2012? Somewhere around there. I went to Germany for a convention. It was my first time ever visiting the country, and meeting lots of German fans all at once. And over the course of my first day, I began to hear stories from people who hated Wesley, until they heard him in English. In German, he was a whiny little punk, in English, he was ... well, you know who he was.

I wish I knew who made the choice to portray Wesley that way, and why, and why the mothership in Hollywood didn't intervene. I mean, he's just a profoundly different character in German.

I still haven't seen or heard the German dub. Last time I looked, I couldn't find it and I haven't looked again, since.

But now I wonder ... how many anime dubs did I watch over the years where the characters were totally different in English than they are in their original language?

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Vienna. One.

Everything is the same. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing is the same.

pairing - carmen berzatto x reader

warnings - cursing. references to mikey’s death.

word count - 2k

authors note - strap in, this one’s gonna be a rollercoaster!! can’t wait to get into this a little more. I love this show, and we’re gonna have so much fun getting lost in that world. this series is going to make you laugh, cry, scream, and want to throw your phone at my head. get ready <3

as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback!!) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3

part two. series masterlist. inbox. masterlist.

home (hōm) - the place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or household.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

Everything is the same. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing is the same.

You’ve been staring at the outside of the building for fifteen minutes.

It looks so different that you had to check the street sign, ensuring you are where you thought you were.

The Bear.

It was The Beef, the last time you were here. Stood in this very spot, tears dripping down your face, you bid farewell to the life you once knew.

Now you’re back.

It looks slick, professional, high end. It’s all polished glass and sharp edges, a drastic contrast from what once stood here.

You wonder what Michael would think.

The thought sends a pang of sadness through your heart, which you shake off as quickly as possible. Today should be a happy day, you remind yourself. Emphasis on should.

You take a deep breath and try the door of the restaurant, surprised when you find it unlocked. Walking inside, you have to stop and take in what’s in front of you.

No more sticky floors or peeling paint or arcade machines. No more flickering lights or red pleather booths or plastic cutlery.

The restaurant you’re currently stood in is slick, spotlessly clean, perfectly laid out. It’s like something out of a magazine. You’re in shock, bewildered by the transformation.

“Holy shit.”

The kitchen door has swung open, and across from you stands Richie Jerimovich.

“Am I hallucinating, or what?”

You laugh, and before you know it, he’s striding towards you, throwing his arms out for you to jump into. He wraps you in a bear hug, spinning you in circles like when you were a kid. You’re dizzy when he puts you down, his hand grabbing your shoulder to steady you on your feet.

“You hallucinate often these days, old man?”

“Old man,” he scoffs. “Yeah fuckin’ right. Do I look old to you?”

“You want me to answer that?”

He shoves you playfully, shaking his head.

“Thought I was seeing ghosts when I saw you stood in here.”

“If anyone’s hallucinating, it’s me. How… how did you do this? It’s like a whole new restaurant, Cousin.”

“Pretty cool, huh?”

“Really cool. I think I stood and stared at the sign outside for like twenty minutes. Seriously.”

He throws an arm around your shoulders, pulling you in.

“He’d have liked it, right?”

You can hear the slight waver in his voice, well disguised insecurity peeking through.

“He’d have fucking loved it, Richie.”

He presses a kiss into your hair, bumping your hip with his affectionately.

“So what, you’re like, a big boss here now?”

“I’m in charge of front of house, actually. I’ve been professionally trained and shit. Oh, guess what?”

“What?”

“I wear suits now. Every night.”

“You’re kidding. Bet you wear them well, too,” you tease, laughing when he kicks your foot with his. “You always scrubbed up well.”

“You gotta see it for yourself. We’ll make you up a table tonight, get you to try everything.”

“Oh, no, it’s okay. I’m not gonna put you guys out like that.”

“Vi, you’re not putting us out. And you and I both know Carmen isn’t going to take no for an answer.”

Your heart skips a beat at the very mention of his name.

“I just don’t want to be an inconvenience.”

“Babe,” he practically whines, pulling you into him, “you are never an inconvenience. For any of us.”

“Okay, okay,” you relent, resting your head on his arm. “I can’t wait.”

Richie grins, excitement vibrating off him.

“Okay, let me look at you. You look good, Vi!”

You mock a twirl, spinning with a curtsy for good measure.

“I like your hair like this,” he compliments, plucking at a strand. “Suits you.”

“Thanks, Casanova,” you laugh. “How’s Eva?”

“Oh, she’s good. So good. Did you see all the pictures I posted from the Taylor Swift concert? I’m officially the best dad in the world.”

“I did, and they were the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. She’s so big, now. Can’t wait to see her soon.”

“I’m sure she’ll be excited to see you. Cousin tells her stories about you all the time.”

“…he does?”

“Are you kidding? Of course he does. Sugar does too.”

A cool sense of relief washes over you. It’s nice to know that they haven’t forgotten about you, as stupid as it sounds. There’s something comforting about knowing they still talk about you, even when you’re gone.

He plants a kiss on the crown of your head as the kitchen door flies open once again. Marcus, Tina and Ebra file in, along with a girl you’ve never met before. They’re looking at you with curious expressions on their faces when you hear it.

“Does anyone know where the fuck I put my good knife?”

When he doesn’t get an answer, he strides into the restaurant, stopping in his tracks at the sight of you at Richie’s side.

He tries to speak, but he can’t.

Instead, he practically runs across the room, wrapping his arms around you as your feet leave the floor.

You bury your head into the crook of his neck, breathing in the smell of home that you’ve missed so much. He’s murmuring into your ear, but you can’t for the life of you work out what he’s saying. It’s all low and slow, careful to not be overheard. You tangle your fingers into the hair at the back of his head, nudging his face back into your shoulder. He presses a gentle kiss to your skin, which sends a shiver down your spine that you’re praying he doesn’t notice.

Eventually, after what feels like hours, he pulls away to look at you. His hands are on your waist as if they belong there, as yours cradle his face.

“You’re home.”

He breathes it, as if he can’t quite catch a lungful of air.

“I’m home,” you say, sweeping your thumbs across his cheekbones. “You’re home.”

“I’m home.”

You’re completely unaware of the group of people watching you. They all know they should tear their eyes away, but they can’t seem to. It’s new, seeing Carmy like this with someone. They’re all wondering what the hell has happened.

“Fuck, I missed you.”

“I missed you,” he laughs, pulling you back in for another hug.

Pressing a kiss into your hair, he rocks you slightly, as if you’re both completely thrown off balance by the presence of the other.

You step back, giving him a once over.

“I like your tattoos, Carmen. Very hipster.”

“Shut up,” he chuckles, shoving you lightly. You shove him right back, both of you grinning like idiots.

His eyes flicker up, catching Sydney’s gaze. She looks completely bewildered, and a little uncomfortable. Carmy tugs you into his side, turning to face the crowd.

“Syd, this is Vienna. Vienna, Sydney. The rest of you guys know her.”

They all smile, meeting you in the middle for hugs and hellos. You hold your arms out to Sydney, who steps into them somewhat apprehensively, giving you a quick squeeze.

“My name isn’t actually Vienna, but it’s been a nickname for as long as I can remember. So you can call me Vienna, or Vi, or Enna. I get them all.”

She nods, visibly still a little confused. The door swings open one last time, and out walks Natalie.

“Oh my God!”

You give her a careful hug, on account of the bump she’s sporting.

“Oh, you look so beautiful, Sugar. You’re glowing!”

“It’s sweat from the kitchen babe, I swear.”

The blonde sits down at a table, and you join her, eager to catch up with one of your oldest girl friends. As you do, Sydney and Carmy reconvene a distance away.

“She’s pretty.”

“Yeah, she is.”

Carmen’s watching you as you talk to his sister, as if he’s worried you’ll bolt out the door at any given moment.

“Your… girlfriend?”

“Oh, no,” he’s suddenly a little flustered, hand scratching the back of his neck. “Best friend. We’ve known each other forever. Literally. Our mom’s had us a day apart. We were neighbours, grew up on the same street.”

“Ah. And she’s been away?”

“For a long time. Think it’s about five years, maybe more. I went to culinary school, she went to art school, both ended up living in different places.”

“Did you know she was coming back?”

“Jesus, Syd, is this twenty fuckin’ questions?”

“Sorry,” she says sheepishly, fiddling with the end of her braid. “You just seemed surprised to see her.”

“Yeah. I was. Had no idea she was back in town.”

“Did you guys keep in touch?”

He gives a look that says really?, but answers the question anyway.

“Not as much as we should have. It’s hard, being so far apart. We saw each other a few times, texted and called when we could. But it’s not the same.”

He glances in your direction to find you laughing with Natalie, a delicate hand placed on her growing stomach. Nat looks happy, carefree, like the young girl she once was. You seem to have that effect on people.

Richie pulls out a chair next to the pair, knocking into Carmy’s shoulder as he sits down.

“Told Vi we’d give her a table here tonight, so she can try everything. You should join her, catch up.”

Carmy reacts as if it’s the stupidest idea he’s ever heard, so Richie continues quickly.

“We need to be able to run this shit without you. One evening with you dining instead of cookin’ won’t hurt.”

“We’ve done it before,” Sydney adds, alluding to that fateful opening night. Richie snickers. Carmy doesn’t.

“And you’ll be here, it’s not like you’re a thousand miles away. We’ll come out and get you if we need help, Cousin.”

Carmy’s known his answer since the very first second Richie asked the question, but he’s trying to play it cool. He doesn’t want to give away just quite how excited the thought of an entire evening with you makes him.

“Fine.”

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

You and Sugar have ended up practically on each others laps at your table, whispering and giggling like old times. She’s telling you a story about something funny Pete said when you look over at Carmy, to find him already staring at you.

Your heart skips a beat as you catch his eyes, smiling gently at the fact he refuses to look away. He’s so timid with everyone else, so worried about what people think of him. He’s never as bold as when he’s with you.

You wink at him, quick and cheeky, and heat blooms across his cheeks instantly. He winks right back, stifling a grin by biting at his lip.

“You never told him, did you?”

Nat’s watching the two of you intently, gaze flicking back and forth between her brother and his childhood best friend.

You take a deep breath. And then another.

“No.”

“Vienna.”

Her tone is stern, almost scolding, and you suddenly feel sorry for the child who’s going to be on the receiving end of it one day soon.

“I couldn’t do it.”

She grabs your hand, resting them both in her lap.

“Secrets like that eat people alive, Vi.”

You squeeze her hand before dropping it, desperate for the conversation to be over.

“It’s fine. I’m fine. I’ll tell him when the time is right.”

“The time is never right when it comes to Carmen. You and I both know this.”

You refuse to admit she’s right, even though deep down, you know she is absolutely is.

“You haven’t told him? Richie hasn’t either?”

“It’s not our place to tell him. You have to be the one to do it.”

You inhale carefully, risking a look over to where Carmy is stood up, pointing at a table in the corner of the restaurant. He’s clearly in Chef Mode, both him and Sydney speaking in a language you can’t even begin to understand.

He catches your eye and smiles, all bright and bashful, before resuming what he was saying.

You don’t want to hurt him.

You think it might be inevitable.

Everything is the same. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing is the same.

@agirlcandream84 @diorrfairy @raging-panda @melancholicmelanin @nolita-fairytale @jacxx2 @huang-the-geek @2guysonascooter @stxxllaaa @an0nym1ss @thereisnoowl @dreamingofleon

[bradshawssugarbaby]

Can’t Help Falling In Love - Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

summary: -> When your newborn daughter can't sleep one night, Bradley knows just what to do.

A/N: Here’s a little blurb I did for @ohtobeleah’s Galentine’s Day challenge 🩷 This song is one that I sang/sing to my own baby, so I felt really inspired to just write some wholesome fluff with Bradley as a new dad singing it to his baby, and his wife 🩷

pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x fem! reader

warnings/content: sickly sweet fluff with Bradley as a new dad and being romantic.

word count: 1k

“Shall I stay, would it be a sin, if I can’t help falling in love with you?”

You padded down the hallway to where the sound of your husband’s soft, melodic voice was echoing from. You entered your infant daughter’s room and smiled softly as you saw Bradley cradling baby Sawyer in his arms, humming softly to her as he kissed her head. You stood in the doorway, leaning against the wooden frame as you looked on, Bradley none the wiser as you watched him comfort your baby.

“Take my hand, take my whole life too, for I can’t help falling in love with you.”

Bradley shut his eyes delicately as he held Sawyer’s tiny body close to his chest, continuing to hum the notes of his favorite Elvis song in a soft, hushed tone as he rocked back and forth in an effort to lull his sweet girl to sleep. Bradley turned towards the door and opened his eyes to see you. His expression softened, melting into a sweet, content smile, his amber coloured eyes gazing at you from behind his thick, dark eyelashes that you’d always been envious of.

“Hi honey, sorry, Sawyer didn’t wanna go down, was just tryin’ to sing her to sleep. My mom used to sing this to me when I was a kid, she always swore it worked. Guess my dad used to sing it too,” Bradley huffed a soft, melancholic sigh as he thought back to his own father and how he had so little to remember him by, having passed just a month after Bradley turned two.

“It was sweet, I love hearing you sing,” you murmured quietly as you cozied up to Bradley’s side, smiling softly while you pressed your lips against his cheek in a tender, loving kiss.

“I think Sawyer likes hearing me too, she settled right down while I was singing to her.”

“That’s because you’re soothing her. She loves you and loves the sound of your voice, feeling you hold her close, it makes her feel safe.”

“It does?”

“Mhmm, you bet it does.”

Bradley smiled proudly as he glanced over at you, still hugging Sawyer close to his bare chest. Stroking her back gently, he pressed his lips to her forehead once again, gently kissing her as she snored softly. His pajama pants hung low on his waist, his toned, tan skin dotted with freckles. He never slept with a t-shirt on to begin with, but the minute he read that letting a newborn sleep on your bare chest was beneficial to the baby, he started to forgo wearing one at home at all. He dove all in, head first, the moment he found out you were pregnant, determined to be the kind of father his dad would be proud of, the kind of father his dad would have been if he’d had a chance to do it for more than two years.

Baby and parenting books had begun appearing throughout your home shortly after you’d told him, multiplying slowly, one by one as they began to collect on the shelf, magazines about raising children suddenly coming in the form of subscriptions to your door on a monthly basis. Bradley had begun coming home from a day of training, spouting off new ideas for names, suggesting whatever he heard or came across that day. He was as involved as anyone could hope for, his determination to be someone who made you proud, made his baby proud, and would have made his parents proud serving as a driving force to motivate him. On one occasion, you came home from spending a day out in the city to find every piece of nursery furniture perfectly assembled, waiting for your direction as to where you wanted it placed. As nervous as Bradley was about making you proud, there was never a single doubt in your mind about it - he was meant to be an excellent father, just like he was meant to be an excellent pilot. It was just who he was.

Bradley gently laid Sawyer down to sleep in her crib, smiling down at her as she stirred for a second, holding his breath as he hoped she stayed sleeping. As she continued to snore softly, he exhaled, relieved she was still sound asleep. He wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling your body in close to his as you both watched Sawyer in complete awe, almost unable to believe something so small and sweet could have come from either of you.

“Now, Mrs. Bradshaw, we’ve forgotten something important about today,” he whispered softly, stroking your hair as he tucked it behind your ear, his touch delicate and gentle.

“Hmm?”

“Valentine’s Day. We forgot it. I didn’t even remember to bring flowers home for you.”

“We did? Are you sure?”

“Positive. February 14th.”

You stifled a laugh as you shook your head, smiling at Bradley as he showed you today’s date on his phone screen. He kissed your forehead gently, his lips hovering for a moment as he hummed.

“I’ll make it up to you.”

“There’s no need. Sawyer’s a pretty great Valentine’s Day gift.”

“She’s two months old, hun, I don’t think you having our baby counts as your gift.”

“Sure she does. You just gave her to me a little early.”

“More like you gave her to me. I didn’t do much.”

You extended your hand out to stroke Bradley’s cheek fondly, beaming as your eyes met his.

“You gave me her. Without you, I wouldn’t have Sawyer. And I wouldn’t have a loving, wonderful husband either. And, I wouldn’t get to hear you sing all the time.”

“Oh, you like the singing?” Bradley smirked, playfully whispering as he led you out of the room, pulling the door closed quietly behind you.

“I do, in fact.”

“Well then, honey—“ Bradley began before taking a breath and beginning to sing once more.

“Wise men say, ‘only fools rush in’, but I can’t help, falling in love with you.”

[nausicaamusiclover20]

Omg you’re James works ❤️🥹😊😊😩😩I can’t figure out which era of him I like more so this is like a span? So maybe in 83, James and reader were dating but they broke up. Later, she found out she’s pregnant and she tried to get in touch but he thought she just wants money. Fast forward 10 years and James tries to make amends but then he finds them, it turns out his son hates him because the reader struggled a lot and although they have some money they live very very modestly? And the reader had to sacrifice her dreams as she had to take care of her son? And unfortunately the kid saw the reader cry over a gossip magazine where metallicas “showers with groupies” story was published? That made him despise James? So James has to try really hard to fix it? Maybe in the end he finally proposes? And his son is finally ready to accept him as father?

Thank you so much, I hope you like it❤

Love reclaimed

When James and I broke up, I told myself I’d move on—that I’d leave the memories behind, just like he had. But when I found out I was pregnant, everything changed. I dialed his number, feeling both hopeful and terrified. Maybe, just maybe, this would mean something to him.

When he picked up, his voice was edged with irritation. “Why are you calling?”

My heart pounded as I said, “James, I’m pregnant. This is your child.”

There was a silence, and then he let out a harsh, bitter laugh. “Is this some kind of joke?”

I forced myself to stay calm. “No, James. I just… I thought you deserved to know.”

“You thought I’d buy this?” he snapped, his voice full of contempt. “You’re just after money, aren’t you?”

The accusation hit me like a punch. “Money? James, I don’t want anything from you. I just thought maybe… maybe you’d want to be a part of this.”

He scoffed. “You’re unbelievable. I’m not falling for this. We’re done, alright? Stop calling.”

He hung up, and I stood there, stunned, with his words echoing in my mind. The man I’d once loved had dismissed me and our child without a second thought. Tears filled my eyes, but I steeled myself. I was going to do this alone.

Ten Years Later

Life hadn’t been easy, but I’d done my best for Noah. Our apartment was small, but it was ours. We had a routine, a rhythm, and despite the sacrifices, I’d found a quiet kind of strength in it. But as Noah grew older, the questions started, and so did his anger

One evening, after a long day of juggling two jobs, I sat on the couch, exhausted. As I flipped through a gossip magazine I’d picked up to unwind, a headline caught my eye: _“Metallica’s Wild Nights: Hetfield Showers with Groupies!”_ My heart sank as I read the details, the images of carefree musicians living lavish lives while I struggled to make ends meet for me and Noah. I couldn't help but feel a surge of betrayal.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I thought about all I had sacrificed. I had dreams once—ambitions that felt so far away now. I choked back a sob, feeling the weight of my regrets pressing down on me.

I didn’t hear Noah come home until I heard the magazine hit the table with a heavy thud. Startled, I looked up to see him standing there, his expression twisted in anger.

“Why are you crying?” he demanded, his voice sharp. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Noah. I’m just tired,” I lied, trying to wipe my tears away.

But he wasn’t buying it. He stepped closer, his eyes narrowing as he caught sight of the magazine sprawled open on the table. “Is it about him?” he asked, his voice low and furious. “Is it about James?”

My heart twisted at the mention of his name, and I could see the anger boiling in Noah's chest. “It’s just stupid gossip. It doesn’t matter.”

“No, it does matter!” he shouted, throwing his hands up in frustration. “You shouldn’t be crying over some guy who doesn’t care about you!”

The truth in his words hit me like a slap. I struggled to maintain my composure, but the floodgates opened. “Noah, I didn’t want you to see me like this,” I said, my voice trembling. “I just thought… I thought he’d be different.”

“Mom,” Noah said, his tone softening, “I hate him. I hate him with all my heart. He’s the reason you’ve had to struggle so much. He doesn’t deserve you.”

I wiped my tears, forcing a smile, even as my heart swelled with gratitude for my son’s fierce loyalty. “I know, sweetheart. I know. But I’m okay. We’re okay.”

“You deserve better than him,” Noah said, his voice firm. “And if he ever shows up again, I swear I’ll make him regret it.”

—---------

Then, one gray, rainy afternoon, I heard a knock at the door. I opened it, and there he was—James, looking older, worn, and regretful. My heart stopped. I wasn’t ready for this.

He spoke first, his voice soft. “I know it’s been a long time, but… I want to make things right.”

I crossed my arms, refusing to let him see the hurt that still lingered. “You think you can just walk back in here and fix everything?”

He shifted, uncomfortable. “I know I messed up, alright? I know I should’ve been there. I’m trying to make amends.”

“Amends?” I echoed bitterly. “You think showing up after ten years is going to make up for the hell you put us through?”

As Noah appeared in the hallway, he looked between James and me, his eyes filled with suspicion. I could feel the air grow thick with tension as James turned to him slowly, his face softening, and took a tentative step closer.

"Hey, buddy," he said quietly, his voice thick with emotion. "I'm... I'm your dad."

Noah’s expression shifted from confusion to anger, his jaw tightening as he processed the weight of those words. “My dad?” he repeated, voice dripping with bitterness. “You’re not my dad. My dad would’ve been here. My dad wouldn’t have left us.”

James flinched, visibly pained, but he held his ground, trying to keep his tone calm. “I know it doesn’t make up for the past, but I want to be here for you now, Noah. I want a chance to be the dad I should’ve been.”

But Noah’s face only hardened further. “You think it’s that easy?” He scoffed, crossing his arms defiantly. “You think you can just waltz in here, call yourself my dad, and everything’s fine?”

James took a deep breath, his eyes pleading. “I know it’s not easy. I messed up, and I can’t change that. But I’m not the same guy I was back then. I want to be part of your life, to make things right—for you and for your mom. I want to be a father to you both.”

I stepped forward, feeling the heat of the moment. “Noah, I know you’re hurt, and you have every right to be angry,” I said gently. “But James really is trying to make amends. This isn’t just about him wanting to be a rock star dad. He wants to be there for us.”

Noah shook his head, the anger in his voice rising. “What do you even know about my life? You don’t know how hard it’s been for my mom. She sacrificed everything for me while you were off living your rock star fantasy!”

“Hey, I’m not here to argue,” James said, frustration creeping into his voice. “I came to apologize and to be part of your life. I want to understand what you’ve been through. I want to be there for both of you.”

“Why should I believe you?” Noah snapped, his fists clenched at his sides. “You think a few apologies will fix everything? You left! You weren’t there for my first steps, my first words, none of it! I hate you for that!”

The room fell silent, the weight of Noah’s words hanging in the air. James took a step back, hurt flashing across his face. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness,” he said quietly, “but I’m here now. I want to be a better man, for you and your mom. I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust.”

I felt a surge of emotion as I stepped closer to Noah. “I know it’s been hard for both of us. James was part of my life once, and he was good to me. I don’t expect you to trust him immediately, but maybe we can take this one step at a time?”

Noah hesitated, his anger battling with a flicker of uncertainty. “What if I don’t want you in my life?” he challenged, his voice shaking.

“I’ll respect that,” James replied, his voice steady but vulnerable. “But I’ll be here, waiting, hoping for a chance to show you that I can be the father you deserve. I want to be there for your mom too. She’s had to carry so much alone, and I regret that more than you know.”

Noah's eyes widened slightly, the surprise breaking through his anger. “You think this is a game?” he asked, his voice lowering. “You think just because you’re famous, I’m supposed to want you in my life?”

“Noah, listen,” James said, desperation creeping into his tone. “This isn’t about fame. This is about being a father. I realize now what I lost, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to rebuild what we can. I want to support both of you in any way I can.”

I felt a lump in my throat as I glanced at Noah. “You have every right to feel what you feel, sweetheart,” I added softly, trying to bridge the gap. “But we’ve been managing. It hasn’t been easy, but we’ve made it work. James can be part of that if we let him.”

Noah's anger began to falter, his voice trembling slightly. “This isn’t just about you, you know. If you want to be my dad, you have to prove it. It’s going to take more than just words.”

James nodded, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. “That’s all I ask for, buddy. I’ll be here, and I won’t give up on you or your mom. I want to be there for both of you, every step of the way.”

Noah looked between us, uncertainty still clouding his expression. “Fine,” he said at last, his voice trembling slightly. “But you have to earn my trust. I’m not just going to forgive you because you want me to.”

James took a deep breath, the resolve in his eyes shining through. “I understand that. I’m ready to show you that I’m serious about this. I’m committed to being a father to you and supporting your mom. It won’t be easy, but I’m willing to fight for it.”

The room was thick with tension, and I could see Noah grappling with his feelings. “You really think you can just come back after all these years and make everything better?” Noah challenged, his voice quiet but intense.

“I don’t expect it to be that simple,” James replied earnestly. “But I want to try. I want to make things right.”

“Then show me,” Noah said, his voice firm. “Show me you mean it.”

As I stood there, watching the two of them, a small spark of hope ignited within me. Maybe, just maybe, this was the beginning of something new. Something better.

“James,” I said, breaking the silence, my gaze steady on him, “just remember that trust isn’t something you can demand; it’s something you earn. You’ve got a long road ahead of you, and it’s not going to be easy.”

He nodded, the weight of my words settling on him. “I know. I’m ready to do whatever it takes.”

I took a deep breath, trying to convey the seriousness of my thoughts. “Noah deserves to see that you’re sincere. He’s been through so much without you, and it’s not going to be easy for him to open up. But if you’re truly committed to making this work, you need to show him you’re here to stay—no matter how hard it gets.”

James looked at me, his expression earnest. “I will. I want to be there for both of you. I promise I won’t let you down again.”

“Good,” I said softly, allowing a cautious smile to creep onto my face. “Let’s take it one step at a time, okay? Show him you mean it.”

.........

As days turned into weeks, I watched as James made a genuine effort to connect with Noah. He was patient, attentive, and slowly, I could see Noah beginning to let his guard down. They would share moments of laughter, and I could feel the distance between them shrinking.

One evening, as we were all sitting together in the living room, Noah glanced at James and said, “I guess you’re not so bad after all.”

James chuckled softly, a hint of relief washing over his features. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Then, in a moment that took my breath away, James turned to me. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

I followed him into the kitchen, where he took a deep breath, the tension palpable in the air. “I’ve been thinking about how much I want to be a part of your lives. And not just as Noah’s father, but as your partner.”

My heart raced as I watched him kneel down on one knee, pulling out a small velvet box. “I want to make this official. I want to be a family. Will you marry me?”

Tears filled my eyes as I looked at him, feeling the weight of everything we had been through together. “James…” I whispered, my voice shaky with emotion.

“Just say yes,” he urged, a hopeful smile on his face, his eyes glistening with sincerity.

Before I could even process the whirlwind of feelings inside me, I nodded vigorously. “Yes! Yes, I will!”

James slipped the ring onto my finger, and as he stood up, we turned to find Noah watching us, his expression a mix of surprise and understanding.

“Does this mean you’re really going to be my dad now?” Noah asked, his voice soft but steady.

“Absolutely,” James replied, his voice filled with sincerity, his gaze unwavering. “I’ll do everything I can to earn your trust.”

For a moment, Noah hesitated, uncertainty flickering across his face. But then, taking a deep breath, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around James. “I think I can give you a chance, Dad.”

The word hung in the air, both beautiful and heavy, and I could see the emotion washing over James’s face. His eyes widened in surprise before welling with tears. “Dad… that means so much to me, buddy.”

Noah stepped back, looking a little sheepish, but there was a flicker of hope in his eyes. “Just don’t mess this up,” he said with a small smile.

“I won’t,” James promised, his voice thick with emotion. He looked at me, his heart laid bare. “I want to be here for both of you. I’ve made mistakes, but I’ll do whatever it takes to make it right.”

In that moment, I felt an overwhelming sense of hope. Maybe, just maybe, we could build the family we always dreamed of. I stepped closer to James, taking his hand in mine, the warmth between us a silent vow to forge ahead together.

“Let’s do this,” I said softly, feeling a new chapter unfolding before us.

Then, with a surge of emotion, James pulled both Noah and me into a tight embrace. The three of us stood together, a little family forming in the warmth of love and forgiveness, ready to face whatever came next.

[thebibutterflyao3]

“Leave Him”

@pandalilymicrofics - 601 words

It was a running joke between them for years.

Whenever Lily came into work ranting about her husband’s latest mishap with his friends - an explosive experiment in their kitchen or run-in with muggle police - Pandora teasingly told her to “leave him and run away with me.”

When her own husband printed an embarrassing article in his magazine - questioning celebrity identities or the existence of alien creatures - Lily bumped her hip and said, “You should leave him and open a flower shop with me.”

They were friends. Coworkers at a prestigious potioneers’ lab in Diagon Alley that luncheoned together every week day, shared meaningful looks, and met up for play dates every Sunday at the park with their kids. Harry and Luna were fast friends from their first meeting, when Harry took Luna’s hand and gently led her to the swings.

It was a joke, until it wasn’t.

Pandora stared at Lily in astonishment, her hands trembling against Lily’s waist. She followed Lily into the loo after she’d walked into the office with tears streaming down her cheeks. No words were needed. Pandora didn’t require an explanation to offer comfort.

Then, Lily kissed her. It wasn’t friendly. It was real.

Every platonic thought flew from her mind. The world’s axis tilted the opposite direction, yet still rotated around the same ball of sunshine, Lily. It always was and forever would be Lily.

“What…happened?” Pandora asked, resisting the urge to flee from the volcano of emotions bubbling to the surface. Feelings that she’d repressed for so long now overwhelmed her all at once.

“I ended it,” Lily said, half-sobbing. Her warm hands framed Pandora’s face. “We tried an open relationship for a while, hoping it would fix things. I’ve felt guilty that I couldn’t be as intimate as he wanted, as he needed, really. He found someone who could and I couldn’t continue playing along. I was holding him back, holding myself back.”

Pandora sagged against her, trying to find the right words. To figure out how to describe all of these feelings that she’d boxed up and hidden away. She never thought she could have this. It was a fantasy that she enjoyed in her own mind, a little moment of escapism before returning to reality. Returning to a life that was satisfying, but unfulfilled.

“You don’t have to say anything. I just had to…I don’t know.” Lily’s hands began to slip away, her chin dropping to her chest. “Show you how much I love you? Is that a daft thing to say to a married woman?”

Pandora caught her wrists and lifted Lily’s hands back to where they belonged, cradling her face. She closed her eyes and leaned into Lily’s warmth. This was what she wanted, what she needed. Her own needs were long ago abandoned to care for Luna, but now…now that Lily was here and felt the same way? I can’t lose her.

“Lily, if you’re daft for loving me, then I’m equally daft for loving you,” she said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips. Against those lips, Pandora whispered, “We will make this work, I promise.”

“I can’t ask you for this, Pandora. You’re happy with Xeno and have Luna—”

Pandora hushed her gently and wrapped her arms around the curves that she’d only ever dreamed about holding. “Lily, you make me happy. Besides, I think even Xeno, oblivious as he is, saw this coming. He’s hinted at us seeing other people so many times.”

“Please,” Lily pleaded, hugging her tight. “Don’t let me ruin your life.”

“As if you ever could.”

[malum-forev]

Secret relationship with Rogers!reader or famous!reader please🙏🏻

Hi hiii, thank you for your ask! I really really liked how this turned out, and I hope you do too!

It was no secret Bucky is a private person. He’d once pushed Torres off a plane for asking him what his plans for the weekend were, there was that time Bucky added 200 push-ups to the training routine after an agent asked him why he’d cancelled last week’s session, and finally, the day Bucky ran over Sam’s foot with his bike because he joked about it being Bucky’s turn to host Friday night dinner- they didn’t even have a Friday night dinner! Bucky is private private. 

Whispers about him dating someone started when he put in time for a vacation. The man hadn’t missed work in years, decades! 

“Where are you going?” Sam asked, nudging his friends shoulder as they watched the agents spar. Bucky only growled in response. 

“You can’t expect me to not be curious!” Sam pressed on. “You’ve never even asked for a weekend off, and now suddenly you’re leaving for two weeks!”

Bucky crossed his arms. “I didn’t come into work that one time, two years ago.”

“You broke your leg!” Sam rolled his eyes. “Hospital visits don’t count as time off. And even then, you only missed a day!”

“It’s none of your business.” Bucky shrugged his shoulders.

“Can you at least bring me a souvenir?” Sam batted his eyelashes. “Please?”

An uncharacteristic- and honestly, terrifying- smirk appeared on Bucky’s mouth. “I know just the thing to bring you.”

Two weeks later, Bucky came back with a nice tan and a gallon sized bag of sand, which he dumped all over Sam’s desk. 

“I’m back.” Bucky smiled. 

Three months after his vacation, Bucky was met with the slam of a magazine on his desk.

“A ha!” Sam boomed. “I knew there was something fishy about you!”

Bucky glanced once at the gossip magazine, uninterested, sipping his coffee. “Am I supposed to care about this?”

Sam tapped on the small picture of Bucky on the cover, the headline read: Winter Soldier? More like Winter Cinephile? A source close to the Super Soldier tells us all about Bucky Barnes’ favorite movies. 

Bucky was covering most of his face on the picture as he excited the back entrance of a movie theater. What caught his eye was the small sliver of leg that was cut from the photo. Someone walking behind him. 

“Last time I checked, it’s not illegal to go to the movies.” Bucky eyed Sam from the ring of his coffee cup, hiding a smile. 

“You’re being weird-“ Sam narrowed his eyes. “weirder than normal.”

But the thing that made Sam go insane was the fact that Bucky was wearing a suit. A suit! With a tie and everything! Sam’s eyes just about popped out of their sockets when he saw Bucky walk into the Stark Fundraiser.

“You’re here?” Sam’s eyebrows knit together. 

Bucky ordered a single malt whiskey, trying to loosen his starched shirt’s collar. “I told you last week I was coming.”

The crease between Captain America’s eyebrows deepened. “I thought you were kidding, I thought it was a joke!”

“Well, I’m here.” Bucky said, leaning his back on the bar. His eyes scanning the room. 

It was filled to the brim with A list people from all around the world. Hollywood’s finest actors, politicians, royalty, philanthropists. Tony Stark would be proud of the guest list. 

Where are you, where are you? Bucky thought.

Suddenly, the large double doors opened and there you were. You waltzed in, your dress fit like a glove, highlighting all of your best features. All your features are your best features. You could hear Bucky say. 

You floated through the room with your publicist on your left and your agent on your right. You craned your neck left and right, trying to find him- your eyes met his celeste orbs. A calm sea wanting to bring you in.

Bucky sent you a half nod, not wanting to bring attention to him and you responded by tapping the top of your thigh three times. A secret signal the two of you had made up. 

Torres appeared next to Bucky and ordered a double shot of vodka neat. He huffed three times, trying to get all the nervousness out of his body. 

“You look like you’re about to pass out.” Sam laughed. 

Torres’ eyes were glued to your body. “This is my time to shine.”

Bucky’s eyebrows rose for a second, looking between you and his coworker. 

“I’m going to ask her out.” Torres gulped.

“You are going to ask her out.” Sam laughed. “She’s an easy 10 and you’re a-“

“You’re a five, and that’s reaching.” Bucky patted Torres’ back, giving him a sympathetic smile.

Torres looked at the two men angrily. “Chicks dig the soldier look, I’m rugged!”

“Sorry man, not happening.” Bucky shrugged his shoulders. 

Torres snorted. “Like you’d have a chance with her.”

“You’ve got a mysterious vibe but, she’s an A list actor.” Sam threw his head back with laughter. “She’d never look your way.”

A pride filled smile sneaked its way onto Bucky’s face as he saw you chatting away with other famous people in the room. “Let’s make this interesting. If I get a date out of her, you two bozos pick my lunch up every day for a month.”

Sam and Torres looked at each other once and doubled over, howling with laughter. 

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Better yet, if I get a kiss out of her you will do my laundry and file all of my paperwork for a month.”

“Deal.” Both men laughed.

“Can’t wait to see you get slapped around.” Sam yelled as Bucky walked towards you. 

Sam and Torres waited eagerly, they watched as Bucky came up to you and tapped your shoulder. You turned around with a smile. Bucky nestled his head in your shoulder, his mouth close to your ear. They watched as you push him away playfully, giggling nervously with a flushed face, only to pull him closer. He took your hand in his and placed a kiss on your knuckles before lowering his hand to the small of your back. Bucky tipped you backwards holding your knee close to his hip and lowered his head. Smashing your lips together. 

The ballroom became quiet around the two of you, low murmurs here and there. When you came back up, Bucky cleaned up the side of your mouth where your lipstick had smudged. He placed a sweet kiss on your cheek and turned back towards the bar. 

“Close your mouths, you’ll catch flies.” Bucky said smiling.

“You-how-why?” Torres stuttered. 

“We’re dating.” Bucky shrugged, taking another sip of his drink. “Coming on a year and a half now.”

“You’re dating her?” Sam asked, his eyes pingponging from your face and your body to his friend. “How? you’re so- you and she’s-“

“She’s amazing.” Bucky sighed, looking back at you. 

You tried to concentrate on the person in front of you but Bucky’s never-ending stare made you nervous. When you finally turned to him, he tapped his thigh three times. I love you. 

“You mean-“ Torres tried to get words out but he was too stunned. 

“I mean,” Bucky said. “That purple mark just below her ear she’s trying to cover with makeup, is my work of art.”

“She’s mine.” Bucky growled, his eyes like bullets as he looked at Sam and Torres. “Understood?”

The two men nodded furiously.

“A month of not doing laundry or paperwork.” Bucky sighed with a smile. “A dream come true.” 

Hi hiiii This is part of my 1k Celebration, if you like this please be sure to look at the Bingo Card and ask for a prompt! Love y'all <33

And you can find the Bingo master list and what prompts are still available here!

tagged: @kpopgirlbtssvt @shara-ne @namelesssaviour

[m4ndysk4nkovich]

I don't recall it being mentioned on the show, but what do you think young Ian's, Mickey's and Debbie's gay awakening would be?

well, ian’s awakening was mentioned twice, and it was justin timberlake (which i find to be hilarious). it’s one of those things where the writers can’t keep the character’s ages straight but they can remember shit like young ian’s justin timberlake obsession. i imagine that fiona was into nsync as a teenager, and that subsequently made ian kind of a fan of nsync also😭 i wholeheartedly believe that in that magazine we saw lip find in season 1 were pictures of justin timberlake.

mickey is a little harder because i genuinely do not know. it would be super cute if his awakening had been ian when they were kids (threatening to stab ian because the poor kid asked for a pencil back in the third grade), but i feel like the fact that he didn’t remember ian playing little league with him makes me rule that out. if anything, the awakening in question wasn’t really him being like “holy shit i like dick” it was more that he had seen his brothers with girls and had tried being with girls, but he never felt anything. we know that something happened with him and karen, and how could we forget about angie zago? he probably just tried to have sex with girls and realized he didn’t really get anything out of it, but he refused to admit he was gay, so he acted like he just thought love was stupid (i remember he used to have a poster that said something like “fuck love” back in season 1).

with debbie, we technically witnessed her “gay awakening”, except you couldn’t pay me enough to say that alexandra was debbie’s gay awakening. no fucking way. my personal belief is that holly herkimer was debbie’s gay awakening. you know, her friend on-and-off for the first five seasons? holly wasn’t great, she was a bad influence and ultimately fucked debbie up even more- but i still believe that debbie had a crush on her. debbie was mesmerized by holly, desperately wanted holly’s approval and attention, and basically did whatever she told her to. i just feel like there was more than just admiration there, holly was her first crush. but much like mickey, there were little signs like her deteste for porn (canon) and confusion surrounding liking boys.

[thislovintime]

A few more Headquarters song spotlights...

“Band 6 as you may remember was the Warner Brothers cartoon theme. Michael was learning pedal steel and played a little bit on it and we did this thing where Mike and I went, 'da, da dum…' and Micky’s going (makes crazy sounds) on the drums and it was absurd. Then Chip Douglas, who was our producer said, 'I think you got it Micky' and we burst into all together at the same speed and at the same time and ripped through it to our amazed surprise and joy. The fact that we were able to find a way to make that part of the record, that to me was the point of Headquarters. It was us wild guys, us crazy kids, doing the best we knew how with what we had. I listen to that album now and it’s tinny and a little bit like a teenage garage band and we weren’t teenagers any longer at that point but it had that teenage garage band vibe. It wasn’t as slick as the first two albums. I think things like Band 6 and Zilch and the fact that we were making the arrangements of these songs ourselves as we went on through it. I particularly remember working out the piano introduction to Shades of Grey and doing some arrangement ideas on Mr. Webster. I remember all that stuff and that was the great joy of it for me. Making the record and just being part of the overall creative process from the ground up; that’s what I live for.” - Peter Tork, Rock Cellar Magazine, 2016 “You Just May Be The One” features Peter on bass. And as for “I Can’t Get Her Off My Mind”: “Playing the tack piano was fun; that barrelhouse thing. It was a lot of fun playing [different] instruments on [Headquarters].” - Peter Tork, Headquarters CD liner notes “‘No Time’ was just a Chuck Berry rip-off. We assigned it to Hank [Cicalo], who got into a little trouble about it, because engineers are not supposed to solicit songs. When RCA saw his name on the thing they thought, ‘God, he solicited this tune.’ He had to go in there and explain it to them. It was just a tip.” - Peter Tork, Headquarters CD liner notes

[rainisawriter]

A Helping Hand – Cobra (PSF #11)

PSF Ficography | H&F Flash Ficography

Genre: Fluff, slice of life, romance

Prompt: Sweet Tooth (@flufftober) / Would you rather… pumpkin spice or cinnamon? (@slumberpartybingo Fall Flash)

Word Count: 2,729

Pairing: Reader x Cobra

World: High&Low

───── ⋆⋅🍂⋅⋆ ─────

You entered the diner, enjoying the warmth it offered against the cold wind outside. The usual suspects were chilling at the table in the center of the room, eating the omelet that Naomi had made them while they argued about some TV show the three of them were watching.

You approached the booth in the corner where Cobra sat, flipping through a wrestling magazine. He sent you that soft smile that was reserved only for you as you sat down across from him.

“You’re late,” he spoke softly, eyes falling to the ring on your finger. He had given it to you for your birthday as a promise that he would always love you. Though you had sworn to never take it off, he still felt surprised and happy every time he saw it on you.

“Sorry. You know how Hyuga is,” you shook your head, tugging off your jacket. “A lot of people are gambling around this time of year, trying to win big before December finally gets here. It’s only going to get busier and he’s only going to get more demanding.”

Cobra did not like the fact that you worked for Daruma’s gambling hall, but you had known Hyuga long before you ever crossed paths with Sannoh. He had considered, on more than one occasion, asking you to quit working for him but he knew that you were, above all else, loyal.

“You don’t need to apologize.” He held his hand out and you smiled, setting yours against his own. “Just promise me you won’t gamble again.”

Your smile turned sheepish, a laugh passing your lips. You had only gambled once in your life after you had gone drinking with the Daruma babies one weekend. You were on a hot streak, actually, but you refused to quit while you were ahead and ended up losing everything.

You had started out with twenty bucks, turned it into ten thousand only to lose it all and walk away with just twenty cents to your name. The Four boys hadn’t done much better, either, and Hyuga was pissed when he found out. You were pretty sure he was just upset that you hadn’t blown it all at his gambling hall instead, honestly.

“I learned my lesson, I swear. I’ll never gamble again.”

He chuckled, nodding his head. “Good.”

It was pretty late by this point, so the boys slowly filed out of the diner until it was just you, Cobra and Naomi left. It was strange when the diner was quiet, but you didn’t hate it. Everyone needed a break from the rowdy Sannoh boys every now and again.

“Are you kidding me?” cried Naomi, sounding distressed.

You glanced over at her, seeing her begin to pace back and forth as she talked to someone on the phone. 

“There must be some way… can’t you reschedule? Ah, no, I… yes, I understand… I’m sorry about that, but…” She pinched the bridge of her nose, clearly frustrated but trying to remain polite. “Yes… yes, I understand, Nakamoto-san. Good night.”

You exchanged a concerned look with your boyfriend before addressing her. “Everything alright, Nao?”

“No, not at all.” She ran a hand through her hair, continuing to pace.

Cobra leaned forward, brow furrowed in concern. “What is it?”

“You remember how I was asked to help provide snacks for the elementary school’s autumn festival, right?”

He nodded.

“The job was supposed to be split between me and Nakamoto-san, the head of the PTA but she just told me that something came up and she can’t help. There’s no way I can do it by myself! What am I going to do?”

You frowned, standing up to comfort her. “It’s alright, Nao. I’ll help.”

“You will?” She looked at you hopefully. “Are you sure? I know you’re really busy with Daruma…”

“Don’t worry, Hyuga owes me some vacation time anyway,” you grinned. 

“Are you sure he’ll give it to you?”

“Nothing is ever a sure thing with him, but I’ll find a way to get out of work.” You gave her a reassuring look. “I���m not very experienced with baking, but I know how to follow a recipe. If you write down everything I need and how to make them, I’ll happily help.”

“Thank you so much!” She threw her arms around you, hugging you tightly which you returned without hesitation.

Cobra felt butterflies in his stomach as he watched you. You were willing to blow off your responsibilities with Hyuga to help Naomi, to help a member of his family. The amount of happiness that brought him was, quite frankly, embarrassing. 

“I’ll help, too.”

Naomi looked between the two of you with glassy eyes. “Thank you both so much! I’ll get to work on the lists and recipes.” And then she disappeared into the back.

Cobra approached you with a warm smile, wrapping his arms around you. “Thank you for helping her. Let me know if Hyuga gives you a hard time.”

“I’m always happy to help your family, Jun.”

He hummed, brushing his lips against your own. “They’ll be your family, too, one day.”

You chuckled, looping your arms around his neck, fingers playing with the hair at his nape. “I don’t think so. I’ll always be Daruma and, well… we caused you guys a lot of trouble at one point. They may be willing to put up with me because of you, but I doubt they’ll ever view me as part of the family.”

His brow furrowed in concern. Had one of the Sannoh boys said something to you? Thinking about it, he hadn’t really discussed it with the others. You just started dating one day and he started to bring you around without asking how everyone felt about it. He knew Yamato didn’t trust you at first, but did he still feel that way?

You poked the spot between his brows. “If you keep frowning like that, you’re gonna get premature wrinkles.”

His lips formed your name but you cut him off, knowing what he was going to say.

“It’s really not a big deal, baby. I went into this relationship knowing that they most likely wouldn’t accept me and I honestly don’t blame them for it. As long as I get to be with you, that’s enough.” You tugged him closer until your lips met.

He didn’t hesitate to kiss you back, but his mind was partly elsewhere. It was enough for you, perhaps, but not for him. He wanted them to accept you, to love you like he did. He didn’t just want to be your boyfriend, he wanted to be your everything like you were to him.

Having his family accept you and love you was important to him.

“Okay, this should be everything.” Naomi returned with a small stack of papers, pausing when she saw how close the two of you were. “Am I… interrupting something?” The sly smile on her lips said that she already had her answer.

You laughed, pulling away from him. “We were just keeping each other company until you returned.”

“Sure,” she chuckled, handing you the stack. “I printed out the recipes for you. Each one has a full list of everything you’ll need to make them and if you have any questions, I’m just a phone call away.”

“Nice. When do they need to be made?”

“The festival is tomorrow afternoon,” she winced, running a hand through her hair. “We need to start working on them tonight if we want to make it in time… I’m sorry, I should have told you that first… it’s probably too short notice, right?”

“I’ll make it work and yes, I’m sure.”

“Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome,” you replied, turning to look at Cobra and holding out your hand. “Up for some late-night shopping?”

“Sounds fun.” He slid his hand into your own, fingers lacing together.

───── ⋆⋅🍂⋅⋆ ─────

As soon as you returned home, you started to look over the recipes while Cobra put away anything perishable. None of them seemed too complicated so you felt confident that you could make them with little to no problem, especially with Cobra at your side.

“What are we making first?” He leaned on the counter beside you, peering at the recipes. 

“What do you think?”

“We should probably choose whatever takes the longest to make so we can get it out of the way.” His eyes scanned through pages before tapping the one for the Sakura Mochi. “This is the longest, so let’s start with it.”

“Okay, let’s see. We’re supposed to soak the sweet rice for at least an hour and soak the sakura leaves for fifteen minutes.”

“Easy,” he grinned, grabbing two bowls and filling them with water. “We have to wait for them to soak, so which recipe is next?”

“Purin! We have to combine the sugar and water into a saucepan. Medium heat until the sugar has dissolved.”

Cobra did as you ordered without question, enjoying how domestic this all felt. He could definitely get used to this and was already making up excuses in his mind to get the two of you cooking together again.

For the rest of the night, the two of you worked together to bake the various treats requested by Naomi and you felt as if you were making pretty good time, all things considered. You did end up getting into a flour fight with Cobra because he kept trying to steal some of the finished treats, unable to fight his sweet tooth.

You were proud to say you had won that fight, though the messy kitchen was a reminder that you both had lost the war.

You yawned as you looked at the final two recipes, trying to decide which one you wanted to make. You had messaged Naomi about your progress and she told you that there were plenty of treats between the three of you. You should have gone to bed since it was nearly five in the morning, but you wanted to make one last thing first.

You hummed, thoughtfully. “Hey, Jun?”

“Yes, love?” He glanced over at you from where he sat on the couch, looking half-asleep.

You leaned on the counter, smiling at how cute he looked, even with bits of flour stuck to his blonde locks. “Would you rather have pumpkin spice cookies or cinnamon cookies?”

He thought about it for a moment, shifting to a more comfortable position. “I’ve never had pumpkin spice cookies before but I know you like them. I choose those.”

“What if you don’t like them?”

He hummed, closing his eyes. “I’ll like anything you make.”

“Such a hopeless romantic,” you teased softly, walking over to cover him with the blanket. You brushed the hair away from his face, fingers lingering on his cheek longer than necessary.

It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, though you really couldn’t blame him. All you wanted to do was sleep, as well, but you decided that making these cookies was more important. He had worked hard and, though he did attempt to swipe a few treats, he had mostly behaved.

Cobra was a man who loved sweets. More than anything, he wanted the sweets that you had made with your own hands because, to him, they tasted all the sweeter. You had honestly always wanted to bake for him, but you had just never gotten around to it for two reasons.

The first was because Hyuga kept you so busy that you rarely had the time or energy. The second, which was probably more important, was because you were afraid. Afraid that they would come out terrible and he would hate them, yet he would still force himself to eat them because he loved you.

You slapped both of your cheeks at the same time, shaking your head to wake yourself up. You were going to make these cookies for him and he was going to love them, not just because you made them yourself, but because they tasted amazing.

───── ⋆⋅🍂⋅⋆ ─────

Cobra woke up several hours later, the apartment still smelling like sugar, pumpkin and various other sweet flavors that made his mouth water. He expected you to be asleep in the bedroom but you weren’t. You had fallen asleep at the island, the other half of your body draped over the countertop, arms acting as a pillow.

All of the treats had been wrapped up or placed in containers, ready to be picked up by Naomi. He glanced at the clock. There were still a few hours left before she was due to arrive so he had time to clean up. Before doing that, however, he wanted to take you to the bedroom. That couldn’t be a comfortable position to sleep in, after all.

He brought you carefully into his arms and you shifted closer to his warmth, mumbling incoherently in your sleep about pumpkin sugar cubes and honey tea. With a chuckle, he placed you gently in bed, bringing the covers over you so you wouldn’t catch a cold.

“Sleep well, love,” he whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to your forehead. It took a while for him to get the mess cleaned up and he was sure he had missed some flour somewhere, but that was a problem for the future.

There was a knock on the door and he headed over to open it, drying his hands with a dish towel.

“Good morning,” greeted Naomi, looking tired but pleased. 

“Morning.” He stepped aside to let her in. “We got everything done and ready to go.”

“Thank you so much for the help. You two really saved me.”

“Don’t mention it. We were happy to help. Do you want some coffee?”

“I wish I could stay for one, but I have to get these to the school.”

“Do you need help?”

“No, I’ve got it,” she smiled gratefully, packing away the containers into the reusable bag she had brought with her. When she picked up the final container, she paused, a smile coming to her lips. “Pretty sure this one is for you.”

His brow furrowed as he took the plastic container from her. An orange sticky note sat on the lid with his name written on it next to a cute little heart. When had you made these? He realized it must have been after he fell asleep and he couldn’t help but smile, warmth filling his chest.

“I’ll see you later,” said Naomi as she headed for the door. “Thank you again!”

“Be safe, Naomi.”

Once she was gone, he grabbed one of the cookies from its container, taking a small bite. It was his first time trying a pumpkin spice cookie so he was a bit weary at first, but the flavor exploded on his tongue. Maybe he was crazy, but he felt as if he could feel every ounce of love you had poured into them.

With a smile, he returned to the bedroom, sliding under the covers and pulling you into his arms. You didn’t hesitate to snuggle further into his chest, adoring the way he smelled and how warm his body was.

“What time is it?” you mumbled.

He glanced at the clock on the bedside table, brushing his fingers through your hair. “It’s almost nine.”

“Shit, Naomi will be here soon.” You tried to sit up but he tightened his grip, keeping you in place.

“I already passed them along to her. Go back to sleep.”

“You didn’t give her the cookies in the plastic container with the blue lid, did you?”

“No, love,” he answered softly, unable to hold back his smile. “You didn’t have to make them for me.”

“I wanted to. I hope they came out tasting good,” you muttered, looking up at him tiredly.

“They taste amazing.”

“Do you mean that or are you just saying that because I made them?”

“I mean it.” He cupped your cheek, leaning down to rub his nose against yours. The gesture was cute and sweet, but it left you feeling embarrassed. “Thank you for making them.”

“If you want… I can bake for you more often?”

“Please,” he replied quickly before clearing his throat, color rising to his cheeks. “I’d really like that.”

“Consider it done, then,” you laughed, snuggling closer to him and closing your eyes. 

───── ⋆⋅🍂⋅⋆ ─────

-> High&Low/Rampage Taglist: @kiraaaeon, @simpforchuchu, @star2fishmeg, @thatpoindexterpixy @manhwabtch

-> General Taglist: @asterhaze, @mrskenpachizaraki

[steddieas-shegoes]

this place is such great motivation for anyone trying to move the fuck away from hibernation

chapter 7: i will die in the house that i grew up in also on ao3 all chapters masterpost rated e

🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰🧰

Neither of them got more than an hour of sleep.

Steve curled into his side, tried to hide his sniffling and silent crying, but wasn’t doing a great job. Eddie let his own tears fall silently as he tried to think of any possible way to make this work for them.

Mia woke up as usual for a bottle, but Steve wordlessly got up the moment he heard her whine on the baby monitor.

Eddie could get used to something like this.

He just couldn’t get used to it here.

- - - - - - - - -

The next morning, while Steve was in the shower, Eddie made coffee and oatmeal for them.

Robin was already standing at the counter with a cup of orange juice and a magazine.

She took one look at him and set both down on the counter.

“What happened?”

Steve should talk to her, not him. He wasn’t that close with Robin even before she left Hawkins. They hung out, of course, but never alone, and rarely even talked to each other outside of the group.

He couldn’t be the one to explain this to her.

“Maybe you should talk to Steve,” he suggested, focusing on his task so he wouldn’t break down in tears.

“You look like someone died. Did someone die? Oh my god, who died?” She started pacing behind him, her breathing getting louder and faster by the step. “Steve would’ve already been out here if it was one of the kids. It can’t be Hop, he would be devastated. You wouldn’t be able to be out here making coffee.”

“Robin, no one died,” Eddie said, pressing the start button on the coffeemaker.

“Then why are you miserable? Did he break up with you?” Now she sounded pissed. “I swear, how many times do I have to tell that idiot to just let himself be happy? He could have nice things if he just stopped questioning everything all the time. I don’t know what the hell he needs to believe it. A sign from God himself? He doesn’t even believe in God, never mind.”

“Robin.” Steve’s broken voice came from the kitchen doorway. They both turned to him at the same time, taking in his still-wet hair, his comfy clothes.

Robin ran to him, already opening her arms in comfort.

Eddie turned back to the cabinets in front of him, hoping it would be easy to find the oatmeal. He ignored the whispers coming from them, grateful when they finally left the kitchen area so he wouldn’t have to hear his name again.

Steve deserved to be able to talk this through with someone else.

But so did Eddie.

He checked the clock and saw that it was a decent enough time to call Wayne. Mia was still asleep, but probably wouldn’t be for much longer. He had to do it now or risk not doing it at all.

Wayne answered in two rings, probably busy making himself breakfast near the phone in the kitchen.

The moment Eddie heard his gruff voice say “Ed? That you?”, he broke down in tears.

“What’s happened? You need me to come get ya? Is Mia okay? Are you?”

“I can’t- Wayne, I can’t-“ He gasped, breaths painful and harsh as he started to realize that this really wasn’t gonna work.

“Hey, where’s Steve? You need to take a breath, son. Nice and slow like I showed ya.”

Eddie tried, but it hurt.

Hands were on his back and the phone was being pulled from his grip, but the tunnel vision kept him from properly seeing who it was. He would assume Steve, but if he was able to think clearly he would have registered Steve talking to Wayne in the distance and two hands still being on his shoulders a lot faster.

“Keep breathing in and out, Eddie. It’s okay. Everyone is safe. Steve’s talking to your uncle. Just keep breathing.”

Robin was the one touching him.

His eyes focused on her, immediately noticing the panic on her face.

“S-sorry,” he managed to get out.

“Hey, don’t apologize. Just breathe.”

Robin was pretty damn good at this. He thought about Steve telling him how she was the one who usually got him through panic attacks and nightmares, how she would hold him until he could remember he was human again, how she could talk him out of the worst feelings in the world.

She kept squeezing his shoulders and arms every few seconds, giving him a silent reminder to breathe in. She didn’t break eye contact with him, even though he knew it was sometimes hard for her to maintain it in regular conversation.

“Thanks, Robin. I got it from here,” Steve was taking her place in front of him, warm hands cupping his face. “Hey baby, think you can move to the couch?”

Eddie nodded and managed to stand up —when did he even actually end up sitting on the floor?— with Steve’s help.

The couch was a lot better than the floor, but only until he heard a small cry come from Mia’s room, and the panic started again. He started to get up, but Steve pushed him back down.

“I’ll get her. Will it help to hold her or make it worse?” Steve asked calmly, the hand on his shoulder a comforting weight.

“Help.”

Steve was up and out of the room quickly after that, and Eddie could faintly hear him talking to Mia, fake cheer in his voice as he said good morning to her.

He listened as Mia babbled incoherently and started saying ‘mama’ as they came out to sit in front of him.

“Give Daddy a big hug, just like I told you!” Steve held Mia out towards him and he pulled her close, hugging her against his chest. “I’ll get her breakfast ready.”

Steve seemed hesitant to actually go, but he managed to sneak away before Mia noticed.

Eddie let Mia babble at him, sounds that probably meant a lot to her, but just sounded like gibberish to him. He didn’t mind though, every sound was a reminder that she was here in his arms, safe, and he was safe, and they were gonna be fine.

They would have to be fine.

And they would have to be fine without Steve.

Somehow.

“Oh, princess, I dunno what to do,” he mumbled against the top of her head. She was too young to remember his crisis, so he let a few more tears fall as she kept babbling at him.

He heard footsteps coming back towards them and looked up to see Robin sitting down across from him.

“Hey,” she whispered. “I’ll handle her breakfast if you wanna go talk with Steve. He’s trying to do that thing where he’s big and strong and doesn’t need to cry, but we both know he’s on the edge of a breakdown and the only person who could handle it right now is you. I’m built for the after.”

Eddie let out a snort, picturing the way she probably had to be around for at least a few of Steve’s breakdowns, trying so hard to comfort him with words and hugs that just weren’t right. Steve was particular about how he received comfort, and even as well as Robin knew him, she just never quite got it right.

“Mia, you wanna hang out with Birdie? She’s pretty cool. Likes to talk a lot just like you,” Eddie winked at Robin. “And I bet she’ll even read you a story if you’re nice to her.”

Mia looked over at Robin, studying her in the way that babies always do with strangers.

She looked back at Eddie with the most serious face, let out the tiniest of sighs, and reached out for Robin.

Eddie relaxed as Robin took her, still clearly nervous and awkward, but trying her best.

“Let’s go! I hear you like bananas. Well, I’ve got the best bananas in the world in my kitchen waiting for you. I even cut them up so you can feed yourself. Apparently that’s something babies your age can do with finger foods. That’s so crazy to me. You’re barely even alive! Like you haven’t even been alive a year yet and you already figured out how to shove food in your mouth! That’s so cool.”

Eddie laughed as Robin’s voice faded, her nervous rambling probably entertaining Mia the more it went on.

He closed his eyes and rested his head against the couch behind him, already trying to think about what he and Steve could possibly do.

This was a shit situation all around.

“Hey,” Steve said from next to him, sinking down to join him on the floor. “Think we should probably try to figure some stuff out while Mia’s distracted.”

“Yeah, probably should.”

But he didn’t know where to begin, didn’t know where they’d end up, and hated that getting anywhere would involve them talking about things neither of them wanted.

“So you can’t live here,” Steve started, placing his hand on Eddie’s knee, a calming presence that Eddie needed more than anything else. “And I can’t live in Hawkins.”

“Seems that way.”

“Is there anything I could do to make this feel like an option? Maybe we could look at apartments somewhere else in the city?” Steve suggested.

“I don’t know. I don’t think I could do the apartment thing until Mia’s older.”

“Not even a first floor one?” Steve asked, trying to think of everything. “No balcony.”

“No balcony, but more likely for break-ins.” Eddie sighed. “It’s not just the balcony thing. I’m sure there’s plenty of places with no balcony. It’s just all of it. Being in a building with a bunch of strangers. Having to park so far from where we live and walk half a block or more just to get inside. With a baby that’s tough, it’ll probably be just as tough with a toddler, especially if I have my hands full. And just all the people. What if someone tries to take her?”

“Eds, I know you’re worried and it’s okay to be worried, but you wouldn’t have to do things alone.”

“Not always, no. You’d help, I know that.” Eddie covered Steve’s hand on his leg. “But you can’t always do everything with me.”

“No. I guess not,” Steve sounded so resigned, like he just had all of his worries confirmed. Maybe he had. “And Hawkins is…it’s just not an option for me. Not long-term. I could maybe do it for a few months while we figure something else out, but I can’t just stay there. I don’t want you to be stuck there either. Or Mia.”

“I know. I don’t wanna be stuck there either.”

“So…what now?”

“I think we just have to search for other options. Would you be okay leaving here?” Eddie asked, hopeful.

Hawkins was out, but maybe they could find somewhere close to here that wasn’t the actual city. Maybe they could get the best of both worlds somehow.

“I would if I still had access to decent money somehow. I make surprisingly good money at the restaurant, and if I can’t work there, I have to be able to find somewhere like it.” Steve kissed his cheek. “We could look at some of the suburbs?”

“Aren’t those mostly houses?” Eddie shook his head. “I can’t afford a house, sweetheart.”

“Well, yeah. I mean, it wouldn’t be easy. But I do have some savings from when my parents sold the house and gave me half. And Robin could come with us if it’s close enough, as long as I could drive her to classes. She could help pay towards everything.” Steve shrugged. “I dunno, maybe I could grab the classifieds and see if anything decent is available?”

“Today? So I can help,” Eddie felt hope blooming in his chest. Dangerous, potentially painful, but there nonetheless. “I wanna help.”

“Yeah, Eds. I’ll go run to the corner store and grab one while you get Mia ready for the day. Maybe we could go to the park for a bit? I promise I’ll be by your side the entire time.”

Eddie nodded. It sounded nice. It sounded really nice actually.

He could picture a life like this with Steve: going to the park with Mia after they all had a nice breakfast, maybe stopping at a coffee shop on the way back to grab some hot chocolate during the winter or an iced coffee during the summer, finding happiness in the little moments as a family.

He just couldn’t picture it here.

“I’ll go make sure Robin hasn’t had a panic attack,” Eddie stood up, leaning down to help Steve get up too. “We’ll be alright?”

“We’ll be just fine, baby. We’re gonna make this work. I promise.”

Eddie had to believe him.

********

Their day was lovely.

Steve stuck to his word about staying right by his side, Robin even tagged along for some of the walk before she had to head to work. Mia babbled as they pushed her in the stroller Steve had in their coat closet.

She waved at everyone, which would be cute if it didn’t make Eddie’s chest squeeze with anxiety. Steve kept sliding his hand to Eddie’s back when people weren’t looking to comfort him, to remind him that they were fine and safe and that nothing would happen to Mia.

The park was a bit worse for his anxiety at first, until he realized that Steve wouldn’t let Mia be more than an arm’s length away from him as she crawled across the toddler play area. There were small steps and slides for her to climb on and she was having a blast. Eddie just needed to remember that she would be fine.

They stopped at Steve’s favorite sandwich shop on the walk back to the apartment.

“Steve! Who is this?” An older woman with curls coming out of her hat yelled across the busy shop. “You bring friends to see me at my busiest time, what is wrong with you?”

Steve blushed, looked back at Eddie with a fond smile.

“This is Eddie and Mia, you remember me telling you about them?” Steve nudged them closer to the counter as he spoke, ignoring the eyes on him in the store. “They came to visit for the weekend.”

“Oh, blessed day! This is Eddie and Mia? Charlie, come see!” She yelled towards the back kitchen area where it looked like most of the prep was happening. “Charlie!” She yelled again when he didn’t come fast enough.

Another older woman walked out the back and Eddie’s mouth fell open.

“My love, if you interrupt my cutting tomatoes again, I will make you deal with them,” Charlie said as she came forward with a smile. “Oh! Steve!”

“Eds, this is Maryann and her partner Charlie. They make sure I’m fed,” Steve introduced them before both women came bustling around the counter to coo at Mia.

“Oh she is too precious. I could just eat her right up,” Maryann said as she tickled Mia’s belly.

“She must get her looks from Eddie. Not a drop of Steve’s unruly hair to be seen on her,” Charlie teased with a wink. “And those dimples. You’ll have your hands full with this one.”

Eddie’s mind was reeling as he took in the way they were casually touching, smiling at each other the way Steve and Eddie smiled at each other.

“Are you two…” Eddie asked.

Charlie and Maryann froze and looked up at him, brows furrowing as they took in his confusion.

“Well, aren’t you?” Charlie asked.

“I-“

“You’re scaring him,” Maryann scolded Charlie before offering a gentle hand on Eddie’s shoulder. “We are. It’s not exactly a secret, but we don’t really shout it from the rooftops either. This one had his whole sexuality crisis in our shop.”

Eddie’s eyes widened. “He what?”

“Oh yeah. New in town, stopped to grab food after a shift, started crying the moment he saw Maryann kiss my cheek. We made him stay with us for the night until he calmed down. He told us all about you and what he’d left behind.” Charlie was smirking as Steve turned a darker shade of red. “I remember he said this was the first time he’d ever realized the way he loved you.”

Eddie glanced at Steve, who was trying to distract himself from the conversation by letting Mia play with his hands.

“And what did you guys say?”

“Well, I told him to go back and tell you how he feels. Maryann was a bit more reasonable and said he should wait it out a bit and make sure it wasn’t just a panic from moving.” Charlie nudged Eddie. “Must’ve still been head over heels for ya if you’re here now.”

“Are we done embarrassing me now?” Steve asked as he pulled Mia from her stroller. She was kicking and waving her hands excitedly, babbling now that more attention was on her again. “Mia would like to say a proper hello.”

Steve silently asked Eddie for permission to let them hold Mia, and of course he nodded in confirmation. These two were obviously important to Steve, and Steve wouldn’t keep anyone he couldn’t trust around.

Both of them started fawning over her, and Steve stood next to Eddie with a fond smile on his face.

“So, you had a whole crisis in this sandwich shop? Over me?” Eddie watched Mia giggling with them, relaxed for maybe the first time since he arrived.

“Sort of. They’re being a little dramatic. I just missed you.” Steve squeezed his hand in his own before turning back towards the commotion. “Alright, can we get some service? I’m sure the people waiting behind us aren’t that thrilled about waiting this long.”

“Oh, hush. They can wait or they can leave. Family comes first,” Maryann said while smiling at Mia. “Right, Mimi?”

“Mimi!” Mia mimicked, surprising everyone huddled together.

“Oh boy, she’s never gonna stop with that,” Eddie faked annoyance, but his words were dripping with fondness. “Everyone and everything will be Mimi.”

“Mama!” Mia yelled and reached back out to Steve.

“Except for Mama, apparently,” Charlie smirked. “Lovely to meet you both. Better visit us next time you’re around. I better finish cutting the tomatoes before the boss gets to yellin’.”

“As if I ever yell at you!” Maryann replied, swatting at Charlie with a towel from her apron. “Alright, let’s get you boys some food. The usual for you?”

Steve nodded. “And the club for Eddie. Any way we can get some toasted bread for the princess to snack on until we get home?”

“Of course. We might even have some grapes back there we can cut up for her if you want.”

“Please,” Eddie agreed, pulling his wallet out to pay.

“Oh, put that away. Family of Steve’s doesn’t pay for their food.”

Eddie flushed, but did as he was told, too scared of Maryann to not listen. He slipped his wallet back into his pocket and took Mia from Steve’s arms so he could be the one to grab their food when it was ready.

He pushed the stroller with one hand while holding Mia, slipping past a few tables full of people who were all engrossed in their own conversations. He could feel Steve’s eyes following him as he tried to find a table for them to sit down.

The shop was packed, but there were two tables in the far corner by the window facing the street. Eddie plopped down in one of the chairs and let Mia sit on the edge of the table in front of him. She watched out the window as people passed by, quiet as she took in her surroundings.

“You see all the people? You think they know that a princess is here?” Eddie asked her quietly, smiling when she started kicking her feet. “Look at that yellow car. That’s a taxi. You know what a taxi is? It’s a car that drives people where they need to go so they don’t have to walk or drive their own car.”

“Mama?” Mia turned back to Eddie.

“No, Mama doesn’t take taxis. Mama walks and drives his own car.”

“Mama!” Mia said again, louder.

“I brought you some treats, princess,” Steve said as he sat down in the seat across from them. “And some for Mia, too.”

Eddie squinted his eyes across the table. “Watch yourself, princess.”

Steve smirked before setting Eddie’s sandwich to the side.

Eddie adjusted Mia in his lap so she was facing the table while Steve broke up pieces of the bread and spread it in front of her with cut up grapes and applesauce.

“Did they do this just for her?” Eddie asked, looking over at the growing line at the counter. “They’re too busy to do special requests.”

“They don’t mind. One thing you should know about them is that they will do whatever they want whether you think they should do it or not.” Steve started opening the wrapping around Eddie’s sandwich for him so he could eat with one hand. “Now, when you take a bite of this, you’re gonna fall in love with them just like I did.”

And he did.

He’d had plenty of club sandwiches in his life, but this was different. The chicken was smoked with rosemary and garlic, and the mayo had some kind of spice mixed into it.

Mia seemed to love her snacks, and Steve quickly made her a bottle when he noticed the time on the clock behind the counter. He took her from Eddie so he could finish eating in peace.

They worked so well together. Eddie wanted to keep this.

They’d figure it out.

***********

Robin got back from her shift early that night, and she insisted on them going out.

“Mia’s just gonna sleep the whole time anyway, and you two may not get to have alone time again for a while,” she said as she heated up a can of soup on the stove for her dinner. “Steve gets a huge discount at the restaurant he works at. Just go there.”

“We need reservations-“

“Yeah, right. We both know they always have a table for emergencies and you’re their best server. They’d be stupid to not seat you.”

“And how exactly do I explain being on a date with a man?” Steve asked with his hands on his hips.

“It’s a business dinner with one of your father’s colleagues. It’s to keep up appearances or whatever. I dunno. No one’s gonna question it,” Robin rolled her eyes.

She was probably right, but it still made them both a little nervous to be dressing up and going out on an actual date together. In public. Where anyone could make assumptions about what they were to each other.

Plus, he had to leave Mia here.

He trusted Robin, he did. But if Mia woke up and was scared or sick or something, what would happen? What if someone broke in and tried to kidnap her while Robin was in the bathroom?

“Eddie, I promise I will keep my eyes on her the entire time. I’ll sit in her room and watch her every breath. I’ll call the restaurant if there’s an emergency. I know CPR for babies. It’ll be fine,” Robin didn’t even turn around while she spoke, just sensing his panic from the silence.

“Okay, but we won’t be gone long. Two hours max.”

“Sure, whatever. Just be quiet when you get back. I might be passed out in the crib with her.”

Steve snorted, but pushed Eddie out of the kitchen and towards his room.

“I know you didn’t bring super nice clothes, so you can borrow one of my button downs and a jacket,” Steve started going through his closet and pulling things out as he found things that might work for him. “I’d offer something of Robin’s, but she wears a small. It’d never cover your shoulders.”

As they got ready, Steve snuck kisses to his lips and his neck, silent check-ins that he couldn’t quite believe belonged to him. Steve belonged to him. He belonged to Steve.

That wouldn’t change now, not even if they still had no idea how to actually be together.

“Hey,” Eddie said as Steve was finishing tying his shoes. Steve looked up at him with his brows raised in question, his hair flopping in front of his eyes. “I love you.”

Steve visibly melted at the admission, cheeks tinting pink. “I love you, too.”

“Let’s go on our date.”

**********

The restaurant was beautiful.

No wonder Steve made good tips.

The hostess gave him a hug when they walked in, ignoring professionalism entirely when Steve introduced him as “that Eddie.”

She sat them in a table mostly hidden from the main room, clearly a table set to the side for people who may need extra privacy or people without a reservation.

The server was nice, though he didn’t seem to recognize Steve, or if he did, he must not know him that well.

“That’s the guy who usually only works weekday mornings. He took my shifts this weekend as a favor to the manager, but he hates working weekends,” Steve explained after he walked away with their drink orders placed.

They talked about the menu a bit, Steve making recommendations based on what he knew Eddie liked, as well as letting him know that the eggplant parmesan was surprisingly tasteless in comparison to most of the rest of the menu and to avoid it at all costs.

As they waited for their food, Steve’s ankle brushed against Eddie’s.

“Hey,” he said softly, voice filled with affection.

“Hey,” Eddie replied, equally soft.

“I think I found a house.”

Eddie nearly spit out the sip of water he had in his mouth. “What?”

“I was looking through the ads while you were changing Mia earlier and I think I found one that works for us. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms, decent backyard, in a pretty small neighborhood. It’s three miles outside the city so we’d have pretty easy access, but would also have the privacy of living outside of town.” Steve smirked. “And with my down payment from savings, our mortgage would only be a couple hundred a month. If Robin comes to help out, it would actually be cheaper than the apartment by the end of it.”

Eddie gaped at him, his heart racing at the thought of the problem already being resolved.

“It may need some work on the porch, but I figure we could probably buy what we need relatively cheap and maybe Wayne could come out one weekend to help fix it up. The master bathroom needs a deep cleaning, but I can do that once it’s ours.”

“Stevie-“

“It already passed inspection though other than that, so they reduced the price a bit since it’ll involve some other costs once we move in. And since it’s so close, we’d just fill up my car for a few trips so no need for renting a truck. And Robin already said it looked nice!”

“Steve.” Eddie placed his ankles against Steve’s legs under the table and squeezed. “Can we go look at it tomorrow before I leave?”

“You want to?” Steve settled back in his chair.

“Yeah. I want to make this work. We can look at it and see if it’ll be good for all of us,” Eddie smiled reassuringly.

He knew Steve felt just as much, if not more, pressure to make this work for them. He’d been so set on making his apartment work.

And Eddie knew that if he could let go of his anxiety, it would’ve been perfect. But since he couldn’t, Steve felt even more like perfection was the only option.

“And if it’s not?” Steve asked.

“Then we’ll find something else. I’m not giving up.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah. Okay.”

*********

They’d promised Robin they’d be quiet when they got back, but they hadn’t made any promises about after they made it to Steve’s room.

They knew they had to still be as quiet as possible with Mia sleeping next door, but they knew she was a deep enough sleeper that a few noises wouldn’t disturb her.

Robin, however, was a very light sleeper, if she was even sleeping, and would probably hear everything.

“Shit, Stevie, you’re leaking through your pants, sweetheart,” Eddie gasped against his mouth as he pushed him against the closed door. His hips rutted forward as Steve nipped at his bottom lip in response. “Guess I should clean you up, huh?”

“Please,” Steve begged, his eyes glassy and needy.

“Being so good for me,” Eddie unbuttoned his pants as he kissed down his neck, holding him up against the door with one hand as he worked his pants down. “Lean on my shoulders if you need to, sweet boy.”

Steve didn’t need to be told twice, his hands gripping Eddie’s shoulders tight as Eddie dropped to his knees. He licked at Steve’s leaking tip, smiling to himself as Steve huffed around a quiet moan.

“Put your shirt in your mouth if you need help being quiet,” Eddie ordered.

Steve didn’t at first, apparently confident that he could control himself when Eddie took all of him down his throat in one go. His knees did almost buckle, but he remained surprisingly quiet, possibly from the shock of the wet heat surrounding his cock now.

“Think I should let you fuck me? Get you all wet and then you can fuck me against this door?” Eddie kissed up and down Steve’s length as he spoke. “I could prep myself right now with how much you’re leaking. Don’t even need lube when you’re this wet.”

Steve finally let out a whimper, and Eddie put a pin in it for later.

He hadn’t bottomed in a long time and he’d need more prep than he could give himself like this. But next time, maybe when they had their own home, when they could take their time and open each other up, take turns inside each other, maybe then Steve could fuck him.

Definitely then if Eddie’s twitching cock had any say in the matter.

“Shit, Eds, gonna come,” Steve whined out.

“Already? Barely even had my mouth on you,” Eddie looked up at him with fake innocence, his hand moving up and down Steve’s length with purpose.

He knew Steve had already been on edge in the car ride home, Eddie’s hands drifting up and down his thigh as he maneuvered through the city streets to avoid as much traffic as possible.

His hands had been shaking as he unlocked the main door downstairs and the apartment’s front door, Eddie watching and breathing hot on his neck while he did so.

Eddie would be lying if he said he wasn’t just as close as him. Seeing what he did to Steve was a major turn on.

“Wanna swallow it all. Come in my mouth, big boy,” Eddie said before swallowing him down again.

Steve barely covered the surprised moan he let out as his cum shot down Eddie’s throat.

Eddie’s answering moan was louder, maybe pushing the boundary of the acceptable noise level for the apartment, but he couldn’t control it.

Having Steve like this was all he ever wanted.

He licked up the few drips of cum as he pulled off of Steve, looking up at Steve’s messy hair and sweaty face.

“Sorry I didn’t get to fuck you,” Steve breathed out.

“Next time,” Eddie stood up, placed a kiss on Steve’s lips, and watched as Steve’s eyes closed and his head fell back against the door. “You wanna get in bed?”

“Mhm,” Steve nodded.

“Alright, get all of this off. I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Wait-“ Steve grabbed his wrist before he could turn away completely. “Wanna take care of you.”

“You can in bed, sweet boy.”

“Mkay.”

Steve would be lucky to last a single minute once his head hit the pillow, but Eddie would be fine without getting off. He’d calm down soon.

Steve managed to throw off his shirt and get his shoes kicked off so he could finish taking his pants all the way off. He got under the covers and blinked his eyes open to watch as Eddie undressed and joined him.

“Fuck my thighs?” Steve asked him, eyes blinking slower as sleep started to win.

“You’re tired, sweetheart.”

“Want you to anyways,” Steve sighed as he turned over, his back facing Eddie. “Make a mess.”

“Jesus Christ, sweetheart. You’re gonna kill me,” Eddie huffed a laugh as he reached into the drawer that he knew had a hidden bottle of lube. “You want me to fuck you so bad you don’t even care if you’re asleep?”

“Mhm.”

“Fuck, okay. Lift this leg for a second,” Eddie patted at his left leg before he poured some lube on his hand. “Gonna get you nice and wet so I can fuck you good.”

Steve let out a long moan at the words, but his leg was shaking with the effort of holding it up when he was this tired, so Eddie took pity on him.

He lathered lube on his inner thighs and rubbed some on his own throbbing cock before throwing the bottle behind him and hoping it landed closed somewhere. He pushed between Steve’s legs, already on the verge of coming too quickly.

He gently moved Steve’s leg down, moaning at the squeeze around his dick, the easy glide through the heat of Steve’s thighs.

It wouldn’t take long, maybe a few thrusts, but God, Eddie would have to do this again sometime when he wasn’t already so close to the edge. It felt almost as good as actually fucking him, almost better knowing that Steve was letting him use him while he was too tired to do anything.

He knew Steve was unconscious now, watched his chest heaving up and down slowly, his lips pursed open as he breathed. Eddie kissed the back of his neck, lingering for a moment so he could breathe in the faint musk of Steve’s sweat mixing with his spicy cologne.

“So perfect for me,” Eddie whispered against his skin as he pushed forward and pulled back. “Love you so much.”

He spilled between Steve’s thighs less than a minute later, hips still moving even when the overstimulation started to be painful instead of just too much pleasure.

Steve didn’t wake up, but he did shift slightly, making Eddie wince as he pulled away to clean them both up.

As he wiped up the lube and cum all over Steve’s thighs, Steve’s eyes blinked open for a moment. Eddie paused and watched as Steve smiled down at him.

“Better?” Steve rasped out.

“Much better. Thank you, sweetheart,” Eddie kissed his thigh, his stomach, his chest. “Go back to sleep.”

“Mkay. Love you.”

“Love you so much.”

Eddie settled next to him, lifting his arm when Steve cuddled into his side and wrapping it around his shoulders.

They’d have this every night.

Soon.

[rabbitenn]

Hii I read your last momo x reader and loved it so if it’s alright, could I request a romantic scenario about momo and the reader who had been an aspiring musician trying their best to reconnect with each other after momo ghosted them when becoming an idol? Maybe they used to date in the past and grew apart after momo discovered Re:Vale. I’m sorry if this is too specific I’m just in need of an angst to fluff😭🤍

RE: CONNECT.

In the end, it was always you and him.

ft. Sunohara Momose x gn! reader.

cw/genre: angst to fluff, romance. alcohol consumption (kids, don’t drink; adults, drink responsibly !).

hey lovely ! thank you sm for requesting and reading my other momo fic, I’m very happy you enjoyed that one <3 and omg don’t apologize, I really like this idea, we all love some good old angst to fluff hehe ~ I hope I managed to write this according to your expectations, dear 🩷 I’m very sorry for the long wait :((

Momo can’t really believe his eyes right now.

Of all places, this night bar was certainly not where he would have expected to find you again.

Not many people fill the worn out tables of the small local, the dimly lit stage casting you in yellow light.

Why were you here of all places?

You belonged in huge arenas, colored lights moving and changing with the notes you strummed on your guitar.

And yet, no matter how small the venue, everyone went silent the moment you started to play, your voice accompanying the melody your fingers strummed.

For the minutes you’re up there, Momo’s mind goes back five years, when he was just a college student with his soccer dreams shattered, and you were there to pick up the pieces, gluing them back together with the notes of your guitar.

He remembers, how you wanted to pursue a career in music… were your dreams scattered to the wind too, the moment he suddenly disappeared on you?

The music stops.

Momo takes a sip of his beer, almost choking on it in the process.

In the half light, your eyes meet.

—

This can’t be happening.

This really cannot be real.

Why now and why here?

Why is Sunohara Momose, your ex, who you have only seen on stage for the last five years, suddenly in front of you?

Well, is he even your ex, seeing how you didn’t exactly properly break up?

He just disappeared one day. No new texts, no new calls, nothing.

You were heartbroken, and really thought something had happened to him. Until one day, you saw Re:vale perform again.

And Momo was there.

You can’t let yourself show vulnerability now, however, so you keep walking towards him.

Why? You don’t really know, you don’t really think, but next thing you know you’re standing in front of him.

“Hey, [Y/n]… long time no see…” Your ex-boyfriend greets, awkwardly.

He hasn’t changed much, and the little differences aren’t new to you either, you’ve been seeing him on tv, on magazines, ads.

Everywhere except by your side.

You still hate yourself a little for thinking how cute he looks with pink on his cheeks, his sharp canines showing through his shy smile.

You loved that about him.

How he could brighten any room with his cheerfulness, but he could also get so bashful.

Maybe you still do love that about him.

Because as much as resentment and bitterness at his ‘disappearance’ found their way into your heart like a poisonous seed, you find yourself shifting back into old ways.

“Too long, hasn’t it?” Is your answer.

Your lips curve up into a sad smile, as you order a drink from a passing waiter, perhaps just to break the awkward silence.

“Yeah…” Momo mumbles, fuchsia eyes looking to the side. His hands tighten around his own beer, knuckles going white. He glances in your direction, just to find you already staring at the floor, not quite knowing how to carry a conversation that’s been put on hold for half a decade.

Your drink arrives. You nurse it for some moments, it’s larger than you had expected… but oh well, you might need the liquid courage anyway if you’re really here, sitting with someone who… well it’s complicated, you don’t know what he is to you right now.

As your lips graze the rim of the glass, Momo can’t help but reminisce in the way he used to feel them on his own, your hands in his hair, his around your waist….

No, he cannot linger on it now.

That’s over.

And it’s his fault.

He notices your guitar case, propped by your side.

“So, you still play?” He ventures. ‘Stupid’, he chides himself afterwards, ‘you’ve heard them play just now.’

However, his statement of the obvious is met with a sweet smile on your part, then shifting into something more woeful.

“Yeah… I do… It’s just… I was never able to… well, succeed…” You hang your head, hair falling in front of your face.

Momo’s eyes widen, either at your confession or at your state, he’s not entirely sure.

Probably at both.

But this isn’t good. He remembers all too clearly what happened the last time you got drunk.

He doesn’t want to see you getting sick again…

So, with a temptative motion, the idol reaches for your glass.

“[Y/n]…” He winces when he utters your name now. Just your name, not the cute pet names he used to come up with for you. “I think you’ve had enough…” Your ex-lover’s hand brushes yours when he tries to retrieve your glass.

“No!” You pout, dragging the drink back towards you.

“Come on, [Y/n], you’ll feel sick afterwards if you keep this up.” Momo tries, brows knitting together in concern.

“Won’t…” You slur, pulling your glass closer towards you, throwing your head back as you down its remaining contents in one go.

This would be a long night.

—

Effectively, after a while, you feel nauseous.

All you can register is the grey concrete of a dim lit street and walls covered in shadow.

And the feel of someone holding your hair back.

Your legs are going to give out from under you… this is bad… wasn’t someone telling you not to drink this much moments ago?

You should have listened.

Where is he now?

“Momo…” You mumble weakly, as you feel your vision going dark and all strength leaving you.

You never hit the floor.

Arms that used to hold you every night support you, your face against a shoulder that feels warm and comforting…

Maybe you’re delirious, or maybe you’d been longing for this feeling for too many years.

“Missed you…” Are your last words before your consciousness abandons you.

“Rest now, baby…” Momo whispers, a tinge of sadness in his voice, in his smile, as he hooks one arm under your knees, the other, around your shoulders.

—

You come to on a bed that feels both familiar and unknown.

Daylight pricks painfully against your bleary eyes the moment you push your covers away.

This t-shirt… you don’t remember having worn it in so long… You just know it belongs to someone you used to love, the print on its front from a band you used to listen to.

“Good that you’re awake…” A familiar voice utters nearby, its tone soft and full of concern.

A gasp leaves your lips when your eyes meet vibrant pink irises.

You suddenly sit up straight, pulling the covers closer around you.

You bring a hand to your head, the abrupt move clearly not good for your hangover.

“M-Momo?” You ask, as you look around and realize that, yes, this is, in fact, not your house.

“Good morning.” He smiles awkwardly, those damned small fangs too cute. “You… uh… were pretty drunk last night…”

Heat rises to your cheeks as memories of the pub come back to you, the too-big-beer and the fact you didn’t drink often, a deadly combination.

“I’m sorry for imposing.” You say, going to get up, realizing you’re not wearing any pants, the oversized t-shirt stopping just where your thighs begin. “I… where are my clothes?”

“I washed them, they should be dry by now.” Your host explains.

Wow, he went and washed them and all, when you know how he isn’t the best at keeping up with laundry.

“Uh… could you… bring them… I’m going to get changed and leave.”

“Are you sure you feel okay?” Those puppy eyes and that tone. They almost make you reconsider.

“I shouldn’t be here to begin with.” You let out. Then you click your tongue at yourself, realizing how ungrateful your statement sounded. “I mean, thank you for having cared for me, but I’ve caused you enough trouble.”

Your ex’s expression darkens, as he turns on his heel, retrieving your clothes from the bathroom.

You get dressed in a rush, pick up your belongings, and are out of his doorstep before things can get more awkward.

Momo stays there, back leaning against the door you just closed between you, wondering, is there a second chance for you two?

What he doesn’t know yet is that you’ll come knocking on his door soon enough.

You find out as soon as you get to your apartment complex, though, the elevator mirror showing back an oversized t-shirt that’s definitely not yours.

—

Why are you wearing your best clothes, and why are you fussing over whether your hair looks good enough and your makeup is alright, you can’t fully understand.

This is not some date, and even if it was, or rather, back when it could have been, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you with no makeup, sweats and messy hair.

You take a deep breath, before ringing his doorbell, hands clinging to the bag that contains the reason for this visit.

“Yeah? Who is it?” His voice comes from the other side of the intercom, and the stupid thought of wondering if you look decent through its camera crosses your mind.

You clear your throat.

“It’s me. I… I forgot to return something to you the other day…”

A sound announcing the door’s opening accompanies his “Of course, come in.”

You can imagine his tender smile just by hearing his voice.

No, you have to focus. You’re here to return his t-shirt, thank him for the other night, and then, leave.

You can’t let your heart fool you again, five years of solitude should have been enough for the moral of this story.

You can’t help but smooth your hair as your heartbeat quickens while the elevator goes up, and up, and maybe you wish it’d never stop.

But finally, this limbo suspended in mid-air stops, the doors opening with a ‘ding’, the door to his apartment already open.

“Hey.” Momo greets you, white hoodie and black sweats on, as his hand fiddles with the door handle, the bright azalea petals contained in his stare slowly falling to the ground as his gaze casts downward.

This expression… you remember memories archived in now yellowing pages, when your lips used to graze his cheek; words of praise for him, the lyrics to the love song you composed with the compliments you showered him in.

“Hi.” You breathe out, biting your lower lip, eyes averted to the side.

A few seconds of heavy silence pass, too many things you wish you could say now; too many years you’d like to have had by his side; too many things he wishes he could do differently now.

You shake your head, mustering a smile.

You realize it’s genuine, that you’re truly happy to be standing in front of him right now, right here, even if things can’t really go back to the way they used to be.

“This is yours.” You offer him the bag. “I left with it by accident the other day… I wanted to thank you for taking care of me that night too…”

The idol takes the package from you, surprise palpable in the way his gaze widens.

“Well, I’ll be on my w-“

“Would you like to come in?”

You two question at the same time.

You give him a sad smile.

“Momo I shouldn’t…”

“Please…” He practically begs you, like he used to ask for ‘one more!’ whenever you played songs for him on your guitar, under starry summer skies. “I- I need to tell you something! We- I want to talk to you…”

“Momo.” You call him, a bit stern. “You had five whole years to reach out…” You inhale deeply. “If it could wait that long then it’s not important, is it?”

“It is!” He goes to reach for you, but stops himself.

You won’t look at him.

Weren’t you happy a minute ago to be here? With him?

So why? Why do you pull away now?

“Please, [Y/n]… I- I was stupid, okay? When I joined Yuki and formed the new Re:vale… I wanted to do my best for him, in five years… And in so, I ended up neglecting you. I don’t know why I acted that way, I can’t understand why I let us drift apart… So please, let me fix it?”

You don’t know if it’s his words, the desperation his tone carries, or his pleading eyes, but you really can’t hold half a decade of pent-up emotions anymore.

“You idiot…” You mumble, tears gathering at the corners of your eyes. “Do you have any idea how worried I was? You just… might as well have vanished. Until I saw you on tv one day, and I knew you were okay…”

Arms that stopped your freefall just the other night wrap around you, rivers of lost time streaming down your cheeks, dewdrops of regret on his lashes.

“What are we, Momo?” You ask, voice a quivering crystal thread, holding on on sheer will power and a heart that never really stopped being his.

“Why don’t we find out again, baby?” Comes his reply, his term of endearment for you managing to curl your lips into a nostalgic smile. “[Y/n]? Go on a date with me?” Is the temptative question he utters in the privacy of just you and him.

With your face burrowed into his shoulder, and his fresh and musky scent surrounding you in new morning light, you know this is a one-answer question.

“I’d love that.” You say, as his hands cup your face, thumbing away your tears.

Your lips still won’t touch again.

But the night is young.

And many more will come after this one.

And for now, that is enough.

[baelpenrose]

Project Praetorian 49: Bleeding Edge, Part I

The kids have their second major battle, their first totally unsupported combat engagement. This battle gets a lot rougher. Before it's over, we will see our first praetorian casualty. Imperator has kept a lot of secrets, and a Praetorian will pay the price. Beta-read by @canyouhearthelight

Xavier

Everyone was twitchy as the team grabbed their gear and piled into the dropship. The two newbies looked especially nervous. Mark was already staring at the GPS and the satellite tracking data of where the alien craft was supposedly coming down. Echo and Amyrillis were in the cockpit of the dropship - apparently Amaryllis had been flying the damn thing in simulation for ages, hell, even a few non-combat live flights.

Still, Mark was neurotically looking over the display already, like he was trying to figure out what to do. They’d talked about maneuvers, drilled them, but the newbies didn’t…

“Hey. Xavier. You’re second in command here, right?” Dante asked.

“Yeah?” 

“You guys fought before?”

“Twice. Won both times.”

“Lost anyone?”

“Not yet. Stay close, and do what Mark and I say.” 

Dante nodded. Xavier glanced over to Casey. Mark’s eyes were flicking across the team. Molly looked like she wanted to say something as Kimmy fiddled with her weapon. Jared was busy tightening his rig, checking everyone else’s. 

Micah had stripped the magazine out of his weapon, racked back the bolt, and checked the rounds in the magazine, then reloaded it. He’d done it several times in the last several minutes. Xavier was idly drumming his hand on his leg, wishing that Micah would stop the weapon checks. 

Vergil was checking his scope - he’d been playing with bigger and bigger rifles, with more outrageous recoil compensation. But now he had the most outsized post-market ear protection possible and a truly monstrous muzzle brake, and he was looking at Kimmy. “You nervous?”

“Apparently I can’t die, and you saw how I was scarfing down as we were getting ready.”

Xavier was trying to watch, vaguely annoyed at the way Mark never took a moment to deal with people's issues when he was trying to do tactics, but of course, Curtis had talked to him about this - that wasn’t really Mark’s job. It was his, and to a degree, Casey’s. He was senior NCO, and Casey was moving into being another one. Mark was the officer, Mark’s job was to be actual commander, worried about tactics. 

“If you’re nervous, you don’t have to be. We’ve been practicing for this nonstop. This time we actually have our own, dedicated pilot, our dropship is hardened. Our comms are better. We’re better coordinated. We know what we can do, and we know what they can do. We’ve got support from two platoons of Imperator grunts, and they’re bringing gunships with them.”  He signed as he spoke, and Molly turned and translated for Mia. At some point they’d need to make sure that squad kept together, or find some universal language equivalent…Translating orders in the field would be an ongoing problem…

Mia herself was remarkably calm, and Jonathan was checking the straps on Shiloh’s armor, making sure none of it rubbed, the gentleness of his movements belying the incredible power in his frame. 

Xavier took a breath. They could do this. He tried not to think about the horrors they’d seen last time. “Casey, you have all the ammo you need?”

“More than enough. Everyone should.”

“Yeah. Uh…Mark…any update on?”

“Yeah.” Mark’s face was pale. “There’s a reason this is taking forever. The target of the landing site, this time, is in rural Guatemala. We’re only gonna get lucky with them avoiding major population centers so much longer - and there’s gotta be a reason the early landings are all western hemisphere.”

“On task?”

“Right. I just…want to understand the enemy. Figure them out better.” His eyes took on a far away look. 

Xavier snapped his fingers. “Mark. Tactics. Strategy later.”

Mark nodded. “Right. So it looks like there’s a canyon near where they’re setting down - Semac Champey. The town they’re hitting is called Lanquin, apparently associated with the native Maya people.” 

“On the nose, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, Spain then the aliens. Trajectory says…one sec…Echo, where are they looking like they’re setting down?”

“About two klicks up the canyon from the town, though from the looks of things if we get unlucky they’re gonna be on the walls of the canyon instead of in it.”

“But if they start on the walls they still have to deploy surface-atmo dropships to bring themselves down from the walls, or they have to be willing to rappel down the sides, which pretty much makes them sitting ducks for Jonathan and Vergil - not a pretty prospect.”

Xavier cut in. “Can’t they pretty much rain hate on us if they’re high enough up then rappel down in peace?”

“Not really. If they try they’re relying on being able to see us - and the canopy of trees at the bottom of the canyon is pretty damn thick. One of the advantages of bullets as opposed to plasma bolts - unless we’re running tracers, which we aren’t, they can’t see where the shots are coming from in the daytime.”  Mark started getting nervous. “Echo, we know where in relation to Lanquin the enemy dropship is coming down?”

“Uh…Coming down a bit coastward, actually, like they’re dropping in from orbit on a ballistic arc, it looks like, using thrusters to guide them down. We had that a little from the last dropship, and the signatures are looking scattered.”

“Interesting. Maybe more than one?”

“Maybe but they’re also all coming down three klicks east, and a tiny bit north - some are gonna be inside the canyon, some are gonna be on the ridge. Think an enemy force about half the size of the last one we fought?”

“And against that we have no backup.”

“I think we have like a company of troopers. And they’re gonna arrive late.”

Xavier sucked in his breath. They did have almost twice the Praetorians, but half of them were newbies. He glanced at Amaryllis and Dante - not quite. They were trained, they just weren’t meshed with the rest of the team. Like Echo. With any luck they’d be just as good as she was. Then again, the thing that had made them so devastating wasn’t individual capability, it was their teamwork - yes, they were lethal, but they knew how to work together. Shiloh and Jonathan were far from the most powerful, but they coordinated so well that no one, absolutely no one, beat them in certain exercises for that reason. He couldn’t help but worry that the lack of training time with their newest members was going to be a problem.

Mark was already planning. “Alright. So, I figure we’ll drop and disperse in this section of jungle, about a kilometer outside Lanquin - there’s a ridgeline, here, for Jonathan to set up shop that gives him adequate room to play hell on the walls with the MG if they start crawling down them, and they’re gonna have to walk into the open to try to push the position. Vergil’s gonna set up in the trees and do basically the same thing, but he’s going to hold his fire until he starts seeing Spikes. Myself, Jared, and Molly are going to serve as a mobile reserve, with me and Jared mostly serving to destroy and disable critical enemy deployments while Molly attempts to disable any mobile shielding array. Kimmy, Mia, and Micah are going flanking along the ridge. If things get too hot, they can withdraw. Micah, teleport. Kimmy, do some gymnastic parkour. And Mia…just run. In the meantime, get into position and cut up their attack to the best of your ability. When things get really colorful we’re going to pull back to the chokepoint a little further up the road, and let Casey and Xavier turn everything into crispy bits.”

Xavier had feelings about being kept in reserve to massacre the enemy if they got far enough up, but he saw the sense of the plan. 

Dante spoke first. “Me?”

“You’re doing the same thing as Vergil and Jonathan, but like Vergil, you’re holding fire til we see vehicles, then you’re firing to pop those open. Save your weapon and actually test it. Shiloh, you’re with me, Jared, and Molly. Echo, I want you to go with us too, see if you can’t get a piece of enemy tech and hack their battlenet and get a better idea of what’s happening so we can figure out where to go. Amaryllis. You’ll stay overhead, and come in with rocket pods and chaingun if we need you.”

Everyone let out a whoop. 

Casey looked around alongside Xavier and for a moment their eyes met. Xavier gave her a nod. Mark took her hand and squeezed, and Xavier swapped a look with Shiloh. 

Xavier spoke to everyone. “Alright. We’ve got a lot of work to do. Let’s try to keep everyone alive this time. Any luck we keep all those civvies safe and they find alien corpses and wonder what the hell happened.” He glanced at Molly. “We get lucky, no humans have to die today. We can rout them without them ever touching the village. Send them scrambling back to their dropships.” 

Kimmy

First out of the dropship with her makeshift squad, and holding the carbine in her hands. She was running behind Mia, who was effortlessly running, even as the comms buzzed in their ears.

“Okay. Should be a small group of enemies up ahead - if you can hit it, quick and quiet, before they fire back…”

Kimmy ran ahead, slinging her carbine across her back and pulling her MP5, even as Mia picked up the pace to something obscene. Micah was falling behind them. Kimmy saw something strange - figures, bipedal, moving weird. Like huge frogs. Six of them were even bigger - spiky lizards, moving like apes, with snakey necks. 

She hadn’t seen the aliens, not in person, but she’d seen cadavers, and seen them in film, and she knew what to do. She rushed forward, shoulder rolling into the brush and throwing a grenade ahead of her into their midst. Micah blurred, reappearing with a loud pop and began spraying bullets into their midst from another angle. Kimmy opened fire, and then Mia was in the middle of them. Mia sprinted in, charging back and forth, firing fast, rapid bursts, finally dropping her carbine into the sling, and switched to pistol. When she’d almost cleared, she shot a Spike in both knees before shooting it almost point blank in the head.

Mia reloaded her weapons, and the flanker squad reloaded their magazines before they kept rushing. “Good job, guys.” Kimmy said, quietly, signing to Mia. 

She took a breath, and they kept moving up the ridge. There was a small group of the frog-guys…Croaks, moving up a ways down.  Micah just dropped a grenade down on them - even if he’d taken a few extra seconds to double check where it’d land. A few more shots from the carbine and the last ones went down, tumbling down the ridge, dead.

A band of Spikes were already moving up and she practically cartwheeled behind a boulder as they began spraying plasma in her direction. The armor absorbed the heat, though she winced at the pain - she started shooting back, and managed to drop one of them, though it took far, far too much. They were, unlike the croaks, smart enough to get behind trees and rocks, and then found themselves flanked by Micah, who had taken advantage of the noise to warp himself again - even if he was shaking, he was now at their flank and was steadily picking them off. 

Mia rushed forward, zig-zagging as she came on and taking advantage of her reflexes, even as Kimmy continued to shoot, suddenly taking the Spike’s other flank - and then Kimmy found her rock half melted, and dove away from it, a burn bursting in agony across her back. She scrambled, pain already receding as her body healed, but her armor hung wrong off her body, and Micah rushed over. 

“Shit. Your armor’s ruined. Your jacket’s fucked.”

Kimmy pulled a spare jacket out of her rucksack, and threw it on, then tossed aside the body armor. “No point in body armor, it doesn’t stop the blasts. Maybe the jackets can catch some of the heat. We’ll keep going a little further.” She grabbed an FSR out of the bag and scarfed it, already craving food to make up for what she’d just had to regenerate. The taste was foul, the food was dense, but it didn’t matter. “How are we doing on ammo?”

“Doing well enough, but…Shit!” 

Mia was already sprinting, and Kimmy grabbed a branch and vaulted herself into a clump of brushes. A mixed group, much larger than the previous, was approaching, spotting the destroyed force, and looking around. Kimmy pulled a grenade off her belt, and in only a moment, they all launched their grenades, scattering the attackers - and sprayed the zone down with fire. 

Forcing herself forward, Kimmy realized they’d made a mistake - as they rounded a bend, a huge force of Spikes became visible, and for just an instant, they saw each other. Then she ripped a grenade off her belt, threw it into their midst, and jumped down the slope. As she fell, she grabbed a branch and tumbled, tucked, and flipped. As she felt the adrenaline course through her, she saw a tree come up, and kicked off another overhanging branch with her feet, grabbed another with her hands, flipping round and round to kill her momentum before flinging herself into empty space…

Then she was falling again, then hitting the lower ridgeline and rolling, continuing to run. Micah had teleported down, gasping, and Mia was apparently running the way only she could, hoping to hit a trailhead and rejoin them, even as Kimmy fired frantically up at the enemy, who were now pursuing but now had no real angle to shoot. She fled, backtracking up the trail and hoping to rejoin the line of the team.

“Mark! Get us some backup! Or make sure Vergil is ready to cover us!”

Vergil

His heart caught in his throat when he’d realized that somewhere along the way, the plan had gone wrong for the flankers. He was already seeing Jonathan laugh as the bigger boy scythed down those attempting to climb down the northern side of the canyon, enemy bodies rolling down the sides. Jonathan then shifted his weapon to fire simply down the throat of the canyon as a wave of Croaks began appearing, firing blindly in the general direction of the gunfire. A few plasma bolts had flashed in their direction, but with the cover of the tree canopy to shield their location from sight, the enemy were firing blind - even if now some of the trees were ablaze in ways that he didn’t like. 

He could see, through the scope, and even without it if he concentrated, what looked like a Spike. He didn’t have a great angle on the target, so he took aim and carefully sighted - then fired. He saw the figure drop. 

Then he saw what he’d been dreading. Some large, too-smoothly moving vehicle, with heavy weaponry approaching, attempting to burn through the brush. He pointed it out to Dante, who began powering up his railgun and sighting at the alien tank. He knew the railgun could punch through the armor - Dante had explained that on the dropship. Punching through shields was another question. 

Vergil forced himself not to focus on that when he heard the crackle of screaming through the comms.  “We’re coming up the south ridge! We need cover! Mia’s falling back, she just linked back up with us! Can you see us yet?”

He twisted in his position, even as Jonathan let out another long burst with the MG and scythed down another dozen or so enemy fighters. Vergil saw Kimmy jumping in a way that made his guts twist with worry, then she turned around, and fire off a series of bursts, pursued by enemy troops. Mia was rushing, but she was tired, slightly burned, and Micah was ragged. 

He fired once, twice, and then a third time. Each shot was a dead Spike. He had to reload, and then as he did so, the most spectacular crack he’d ever heard as Dante’s railgun fired. Actinic lightning trailed the tungsten slug as it ripped through the air, stripping electrons off molecules as it went, and slammed into the tank, the force simply too extreme for the shields to deflect and the dumb, straightforward violence of a hypersonic projectile immune to the premature detonation a missile would have suffered. It ripped through the tank’s armor as though it were tissue with such horrific force that the shockwave pulverized muscle and bone of the crew, and Vergil could see a spray of what was definitely biological material leave the exit hole on the far side of the tank. Then the machine’s containment for its power source failed and the tank exploded, sending globules of blue-white starfire into the jungle around it with an even more horrible boom.

His eyes burning, Vergil tore his gaze away slightly faster to escape the pain, even as Jonathan took advantage of the enemy troops now backlit by the burning tank to begin slaughtering them. The enemy on the ridge, shocked by the destruction, fell as Vergil took ten shots in as many seconds, every shot a headshot. Before they could recover, Mia and Kimmy had countercharged, and even as they had gone all the way through their enemy and started to come back around. Micah had teleported into the middle and executed the squad leader. The flankers began picking their way back down the hill. 

Then another dropship - a simpler, surface-atmosphere affair, began pulling from the southern side of the canyon, and Dante’s railgun began crackling as he charged it again.

“Hold that position and do what you can about those dropships. Apparently there’s another force that got dropped in behind us. Shiloh, stay with them, help out the flankers when they get back. Flanking team, disrupt more after you get back and Shiloh looks you over. We’re going to check out another force that got dropped off. Amaryllis, you said there was another point that got enemies dropped in? Yeah, go deal with that, then take Casey and Xavier to the far side of the village, another force got dropped off over there and I want them taking out that choke point. Drop my force off at the south ridge.”

Vergil took another shot, but for a moment, he thought he saw something flickering in the treeline on the ridge, but couldn’t identify it.

He took aim, but before he did, he wrote it off as nerves. 

Then he spotted another Spike who had the decoration he had definitely come to recognize as an officer’s mark and took the shot, sending its brain matter across the dirt.

Amaryllis

The engines whined as she lifted the gunship up and the teams got back in. D&D logic said you weren’t supposed to split the party, but military history said force multipliers were a thing. She thought fantasy rules should apply to this, based on everything, but then again this was definitely sci-fi and even if they got shelved together there were distinctions and everyone said Mark knew what he was doing, so she’d roll with his judgment call. 

She deployed Casey and Xavier where she was so instructed, wondering at the prudence of leaving the two most emotionally stable people in the same spot, then dropping Mark and the rest of that squad on another ridge, where Mark indicated they were going to be flanking a fourth enemy force. 

Then she took off, going to the position where supposedly, the enemy were beginning to unload heavy forces.  

She kept her ears open on the comms, but she was nervous. They were going to be fine. They were going to be fine.

She opened up the targeting and looked down, opening the fire selector for the chainguns. There were a lot of infantry up there and she should probably sweep that as quickly as she could.   The guns, firing a barrage of .50 caliber hate, raked back and forth across the aliens scrambling to deploy, and before they could do anything to get their artillery set up to respond she was firing off her rockets. Then she looked at her counters - she might have had a little too much fun with that. The rockets were unguided, so she could use them a little against shielded targets, but missile use required shields to be down.

Still, that target had pretty well been scraped off, and she was already going wide to see what Mark and his team were up to, trying to recon scan the battlefield. Dante was probably doing fine, he was in a good position. Maybe she should go give that area some support..?

No, she decided. She’d stay high, and pull in with air support when called. That was the responsible thing.

[thesullengrrrl]

Loved all the November prompts so much , I can’t decide which one I like more. So I am leaving the choice to you. Pick whatever prompt or prompts you like and find inspiring to write about.

xoxo 💕💕

hey there! thanks for letting me pick, i had fun writing these! hope you enjoy 💓

green velvet / matchbox

"Don't you think it's bit...much?" Rosie asked Elaine as she unbuttoned the last of the first three buttons of his white shirt. The sleeves of the shirt were folded up just below his elbows.

Now clad in an unbuttoned white shirt tucked in his dark pants, complete with his work shoes—made him conscious.

"It's just the two of us. It's okay," she assured him, stepping back to admire her work. She worked with what he has, and she got it. They both looked in the mirror, Rosie was well-dressed, while Elaine was in her normal clothes.

"Now, wait in the table and I'll get ready," she said, giving him a soft slap on his butt. His eyes widened and heat rushed in his cheeks.

Chuckling at the sight, she gently pushed him out of the room and gave him a kiss. "See you in a few!"

He went back to the kitchen table, now covered in fresh table cloth, plates and napkins and cutleries all laid nice and well and the unlit candles. Taking the matchbox from one of the kitchen drawers, he lit the candles and turned off the lights.

Rosie took the initiative to place food in their plates as well, so she doesn't have to. There was a bottle of wine that was in their fridge and placed it on the table.

Few minutes later, Elaine emerged from their room. She was wearing a dark green velvet slip dress with thin straps. Her brown hair softly cascading down her shoulders. And to tie it all up, she wore her simple silver hoops and plain heels.

He did not miss the swipe of his favorite lipstick on her lips.

"What do you think?" she grinned, twirling slowly to let him see its entirety. His breath hitched when he saw that it was a backless dress. That dress is definitely not from here, he thought to himself.

"I also have this in black," she shared, tossing her hair at her back. "But I just feel like wearing this one tonight."

"You're beautiful," he answered softly, slipping his arm around her waist.

"Well, you look handsome too," Elaine replied, pulling him to the table and start their dinner.

**********

a fistful of sand

The sun was high when Eve decided she wanted to explore the sparkling waters. At first, she tried to climb on Elaine, but Rosie was fast enough to scoop her before she could wake her up. Elaine was napping underneath the umbrella, with a copy of Vogue covering her face.

The two walked to the shore where the waters lapped on their feet. Together, they chased the waves, pet a dog, play with other kids...until she decided to wanted to sit on the sand. As she played, Rosie re-tied her dark hair. Everything was peaceful until she decided to grab a fistful of sand and motioned to eat it.

"Eve, no! No!" Rosie warned his toddler and caught her hands in time.

"Did mama not feed you, huh?" he asked as he made sure the last granules of sand were removed from her tiny palms.

Eve only grinned at him and shook her head. "Nooo..."

Despite knowing Elaine fed her before they went out to the water, he let out a mock gasp. This earned a giggle from the little one, her green eyes glinting under the sun.

"She did not? Let's ask her..."

Rosie lifted her from the ground and walked back where Elaine set up their umbrella and towels. His mouth formed a smirk when he saw her now awake, and leafing through a magazine. Her bump out in the open, as if she wasn't worried about what she looked like two days ago.

With dark glasses over her eyes and seemingly relaxed state, he wished that he lugged the camera with him to capture this moment. Eve wriggled out of Rosie's arms and waddled towards her mother, who immediately smiled at the sight of them. She launched herself at Elaine, hugging her. "Mama!"

"Hi baby!"

"She said you didn't feed her," Rosie said, placing her magazine back in the bag. He sat beside her and kissed her cheek. "So she almost ate sand."

"Sand?" Elaine asked her, who was now trying to remove her glasses. "Sand is yucky, Eve!"

"Yuck!" she repeated, scrunching her face with her mother's dark glasses on her face. The couple shared an amused look as she lied down in front of them and placed a towel covering her head. The toddler seemed to worn herself out after her little adventure.

"Are you okay?" Rosie asked as he touched her belly. Like last time, they had a bet if it was a boy or a girl. He's betting for a boy this time. "Not feeling nauseous? Do you want anything?"

She shook her head. "I'm good, thank you, darling."

[pccyouthleader]

Hedgehog Hodgepodge: A Story of Espionage, Confusion, and an Evil Plan Gone Haywire

Chapter 4: More Unanswered Questions

Shadow was mostly silent as he walked with Aurora to the YH program. Aurora was filling him in on what he’d missed the past several weeks. 

“Uncle Tails won an award for his contributions to technology. I think the name of the group was the Division for the Advancement of Technological Achievements, or something like that. Anyway, he asked for a private ceremony including only he and CC, and the members of the award committee. Dad was upset, but you know how things go whenever there’s a big party! The weird thing was that when we saw him later, Uncle Tails confessed that he had never heard of the organization.

“Uncle Knuckles and Aunt Rouge were working in the mine last week. They ran across a strange rock or something that no one’s ever seen before. In fact, I think Aunt Rouge went out of town and had it tested for precious metals. I never saw it, but she said it was smooth and round - something you wouldn’t normally see buried in a mine.

“Sticks is, well, Sticks. She found something recently in the woods outside her house and was convinced someone was watching her. But she pretty much comes up with a similar story at least once a week.

“As you know, mom’s been sick and Dad won’t leave her side. I hope they can find something out that can help her at the doctor’s appointment.

“As for me, I keep having this dream about a small blue hedgehog. I think it’s my dad when he was a kid, but I don’t know what it means. I haven’t told him about it since he has so much on his mind right now.” Aurora stopped and looked at Shadow. “You’re quiet. Will you tell me about your mission?”

“You know I can’t do that,” came his rather short reply. She asked him every time he returned from one of his extended assignments.

Aurora sighed. “Am I ever going to know what you’re up to when you’re away?”

“Not if I can help it,” he said. 

“Then I’ll just have to extract the information from you,” she said slyly, knowing Shadow had a hard time resisting her.

She started tugging him off the road in the direction of the little hill where they enjoyed each other’s company on pretty days.

“Wait,” Shadow sputtered. “Don’t you have to be at work?”

“I have a few minutes to spare,” she said. 

Shadow steeled himself for whatever was coming. He was well aware that Aurora wanted to wait for marriage before giving herself fully. But there were a lot more ways one could be persuaded.

—-

Aurora practically dragged Shadow to their meeting place. Once there, she made him sit down next to the tree and settled on the ground next to him. “Now,” she began, “why don’t you at least tell me where you traveled on this mission of yours.”

Shadow gave her a smoldering look. “Aurora, I am not going to discuss this with you.”

She leaned in close to him and batted her eyelashes. 

“Do you have something in your eye?” Shadow asked, confused.

“I’m fine,” replied Aurora in a seductive voice. “The thing is, there’s something I’ve been wanting to get off my chest…”

Shadow automatically looked down at the aforementioned area, then snapped his gaze back up at Aurora when he realized it. She knew she had him. Reaching somewhere behind her, she started leaning in closer.

“You’re so very…” (closer) “very…” (closer) “very…” (cloooserrrr) “AGGRAVATING WHEN YOU WON’T TELL ME THINGS!” Aurora thrashed him with a magazine from her bag.

“Aurora!” Shadow stammered. He reached out and clasped his hands around her wrists. She gasped in pain when she felt the strength of his grip. 

Shadow realized immediately and let go of her. “Aurora - Light - I am so sorry!”

“No,” she replied, embarrassed. “I’m sorry. Sometimes I don’t correctly gauge your reactions.”

There was silence between them for a few seconds, then Shadow spoke softly. “How’s this for a reaction?” he said, gently pulling her to him. He slowly moved his hand under her chin and tilted her face up to a tender kiss. A current of heat shot through Aurora, making her heart skip a beat. But it was short lived, as her reminder alarm went off on her watch.

“Ugh… guess it’s time to head to YH. I’m sorry again.”

“Don’t be,” said Shadow. “One day I’ll be able to tell you about the mission, but it’s too dangerous right now. I would never want to put you in harm’s way.”

Aurora nodded. She didn’t like being kept in the dark, but she understood his concern. She knew he cared very deeply for her. They slowly started walking back towards the road.

“Why don’t you come with me to YH? You could be a guest speaker! The kids will be dying to know more about you.”

Shadow crossed him arms. “I don’t do ‘guest speaking.’ That ranks right up there with fancy parties.” 

“But you did go to that fancy party with me,” said Aurora with a mischievous look.

“And you know how that turned out.”

“Yeah, I do.” Aurora hid a smile as she remembered the pillow fort Shadow had made with her dad.

“I have some things to take care of in the village, anyway. So you go ahead and I’ll meet up with you later.”

Aurora couldn’t help but be slightly disappointed. “Alright. Bye, Shadow.” She gave him a peck on the cheek and continued along the path to work.

[courtenaywrites]

when the fat girl becomes a scapegoat for her own death

I was as thin as a board as a kid, and I didn’t even pay attention to it. It wasn’t on my radar at all. All I knew was that I didn’t think I was pretty, and I hated that everyone else seemed to hate me, which in turn made me loathe myself even more. They’d kick me when I wasn’t looking. They would tell me I couldn’t join in with their games, and I would run to the corner of the playground and sob.

As I got older, and when the hormones had kicked in, I discovered what it meant to be uncomfortable in your own skin. I wasn’t a skinny girl feeding into heroin chic, I was a growing girl who had no interest in the things other girls were. Boys felt like bugs, and I just wanted a man who could entertain my interests in Shakespeare and Sylvia Plath without asking stupid questions like: “What are you? A nerd?”

I remember all the fashion magazines that would highlight (in red) areas on a celebrity’s body in where they had gained weight. Yet, when said celebrity would see the headline, they would lose all the weight, and the magazine would feel vindicated in the process. They would even go so far as to ask them for diet tips.

When I was in high school (from 2008 onwards), gossip and fashion magazines were still in their prime. My mother used to buy Closer and OK, and inside of those glossy pages were hoards of damaging statements.

In 2023, we think we have moved on, but I see the same mentality over and over again. Whenever a newspaper reports on the supposed obesity ‘crisis’, every person who struggles with their weight rolls their eyes. This kind of language reinforces the idea that being larger makes you a problem.

I recently went to the Doctor about a heart problem, and despite me explicitly stating that this had come on after a chest infection, he began talking about my body unprompted. He spoke of how “a greater body mass puts strain on the heart,” and would absolutely not listen to my concerns. In his mind, the only reason for the problem that developed after an infection is that I’m too fat. After my appointment, I saw a nurse from the surgery smoking outside.

This is a common experience. Before this, I visited a different Doctor for an issue with my periods that has been happening for fifteen years. She told me that all my symptoms were because I am fat, and all that I needed to do was lose weight and I would be fine.

Online isn’t far from this same reality as every celebrity who is criticised for being overweight seems to succumb to the pressure and returns to debut their new ‘look’. Most recently, Billie Eilish talked about her weight in a way that places her previous body in a glass cage.

Adele was fairly hostile about how people reacted to her weight loss, failing to understand what that does for representation. Formerly larger celebrities seem to treat their former selves with disdain, thus feeding into the toxic skinny mentality of the world.

I can’t escape it. When I step out my door, I am faced with gyms, people talking about the gym, diet tips, adverts for Weight Watchers, runners, walkers, cyclists, and more. The world is obsessed. No conversation can be had without someone mentioning working out or starting a diet.

It might not have been so bad if I wasn’t dismissed by Doctors because I am larger. I could be dying, but all they see is the body they have been trained to hate. When a fat person comes to their office, their glasses steam up and all they see is a scapegoat.

I am tired of waking up every day and feeling like a stranger in my own body. A ‘beautiful’ home can hide many faults. We don’t fit into eras. We are not coquettes in the pockets of men. We are not Didion-esque girls who find ourselves at a bus stop with nowhere to go, only to be offered a nice place to stay.

We are told to stop eating. We are told to “make healthier choices” such as having sugar-free frosting on your birthday cake that ends up giving you diarrhoea. Instead of celebrating, you end up staring at the cake like it’s a loaded gun.

TikTokers post videos of “gut healthy” cookies with probiotic-enriched ice cream sandwiched between them. Everything good in our world has been tainted by our obsession with frailty because Sam Levinson’s ‘The Idol’ wouldn’t work if Lily-Rose Depp was a size 20, right?

…No. Her breakdown on the stage in her blood-stained heels would be seen as piggish because it’s obviously her weight stopping her from performing, and look at the snot running down her fat face. Her mother hitting her with a hairbrush is accepted because she shouldn’t have let herself get so fat.

When my mother reads the eulogy at my funeral, they will only remember how the pallbearers struggled to lift my coffin. “Couldn’t they have chopped her up?” they’ll say from the pews while my mother talks of what I did outside of what I looked like.

Remember all of this when I am lying on the slab in a morgue and they are marking my death down as justice served.