#I bet he still has it sometimes

[kuphulwho]

I'm pretty sure it's been said at least once before, but I've gotta say it again:

Kuphulu almost had winged eyeliner... We were ROBBED! Imagine getting nerfed for being too pretty.

[androgynouspenguinexpert]

murder on the dancefloor

[spectascopes]

all art of Sans can be improved by making him fatter 👍 hope this guide helps you on your journey

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Roku: *has multiple opportunities to confess to Ta Min but never FUCKING TAKES IT*

Me: If I was Kyoshi I would've ripped through the walls of the Spirit World and just fucking suplexed you until you stopped breathing.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

omgg lol [guy who won't stop going "more like scapeGOATED" voice] now hold! on!! lmao [same guy just saw encanto voice] Hold on!!!

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

for the most part I actually don’t see Harry and Draco as being the get married types or at least not the have a wedding types but it’s also fun to just. Have them do it anyway. Weddings are fun and fun to write and read about!

[femmeterypolka]

i really gotta replace my music tapes patch but i don't have any ideas for a new patch

[indiegame]

i just napped for like 4 hrs. uh. hello.

[jimmyandthegiraffes]

King Ottakar's Sceptre (1938-9)

Health

Sleeps - 3

Ow! - 15 (head injuries - 3; hospitalised - 1, with suspected concussion but left before being treated)

Eats - 3 (szlaszjeck and szpradj, unknown meal, and bread)

Unconscious - 2 (both relating to head injury)

Emotions

Cries - 1 (castafiore-related rather than emotion-related)

Angry - 1 (at Snowy for stealing bones from a natural history museum lol)

Afraid - 2 (thought he ate snowy :|; got dropped from an aeroplane)

Crumbs! - 1

Great snakes! - 1

Eureka! - 2

The Law

Arrested - 2

Imprisoned - 2

Activities

Violence - 5

Radio - 1

Reads - 2

Travel

Motorbike - 1 (crashes - 1)

Car - 4 (drives - 1; hit - 1)

Boat - 2

Plane - 4 (pilot - 1; fell/jumped/was dropped out - 2)

Horse and cart - 1

Ambulance - 1

Peril

Shot at - 4 (hit - 1, by anti-aircraft guns while in a plane; uninjured)

Hit by car - 1 (accidental, driven by King Muskar, no serious injuries)

Dropped from a plane - 1 (and jumped once when aircraft was on fire after friendly fire)

Thompsons? - Yes

Thomson spoonerism - 1

Thompson spoonerism - 1

Bianca Castafiore? - yes

Sings - 4

QUIFF DOWN - 0

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

"yuri lowell is a manly heterosexual"

yuri lowell:

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

aaa fuck. pla dhau thoughts.

[dbphantom]

Speaking of that trans one/pie/ce oc

Did I mention he's a obvious self insert bc I definitely should have by now. Like. Literally drawn as me if I was in the world of on/e/pie/ce, spoke to Ivankov, and also 7 years older. And I love him. Just wish he had a name... That's always the hardest part ;_;

[bunniixoxo]

also old bestie is a massage therapist

i said i have lower back pain, which is true

he said he could help with that

i was like yes please my back hurts a lot

then he said “i learned how to massage every. single. muscle in the human body, i promise im good with my hands and know how to use them”

and i was like

oh shit

i got wet right then

then i thought oh god my fucking hand fetish

i might start shivering on the god damn table

i might moan

just because he’s touching my bare skin with his hot hands

and so i told him, just as a warning

and he said “you shouldn’t have told me that, but thank you so much for telling me”

dear god

i’ve never been more excited for a massage

[pseudowho]

"So, you go against the hairs...that's right...and then with the hairs..."

"...is-- is this right?"

"Mmm. Now, clean your blade..."

You pretended to tidy the bedroom, sneaking glances up to Kento, and Yuuji, stood shirtless at the bathroom sink. Both had thickly lathered faces, and sharp razors, examining their faces in the mirror with absolute precision.

Sshhhhick. Swshswshswsh. Shhhhick-ck-ck. Swshswshswsh.

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Peach fuzz.

"...and so anyway, I said to Fushiguro, shadows are great but sometimes you gotta just hit a guy..."

Kento listened, quiet, his mind always calculating several threads while mentoring Yuuji; yet, he was distracted. The old school corridor bathed in orange evening light, setting Yuuji's hair aflame, to coral in rocks. With Yuuji's nattering profile illuminated, the edges of his cheeks blurred from their usual sharp relief.

Fuzzy.

"...like, Kugisaki gets it, but she's like, just a bit feral and..."

Kento wondered if Yuuji had noticed. Kento recalled he only noticed, when his grandfather brushed his jaw with one clawed-over old hand, softly mocking Kento's furry scowl in lilting Danish. Kento's eyes lowered to the floor, counting his own steps and thinking in one, two, three and thoughtful on four, five, six.

"...Gojo's great but it's hard to learn from a guy who's that far out of my league, y'know? So--"

"Itadori-kun."

Kento had stopped, straightening his glasses, looking out onto suburban skyline. Yuuji stopped with him, inquisitive. A train rattled through, distant, splitting through the sunset. Kento looked back to Yuuji.

"It's important to look tidy, at work. Professional."

Yuuji raised his eyebrows, elbows rounded as he held his arms out, looking down at himself. He shot Kento a bashful smile, rubbing the back of his head.

Fuzzy peach.

"...ah-- yeah...guess I've always been a bit scruffy, huh? My grandad used to tell me I'd never get a job with hair like this."

Kento hummed. He stepped forwards, and raised one long-fingered, broad hand to gently grasp Yuuji's jaw, tilting it back and forth in the amber glow. Yuuji's bottom lip drew up, his eyes wide in surprise.

"...Nanamin?"

"Has anyone taught you how to shave, Yuuji?"

Yuuji blushed, his eyes flicking away from Kento in a mortified little scowl, his jaw still clasped. Kento released him, clearing his throat and checking his watch.

"I think we're finished up, here. Do you have any evening plans, Itadori-kun?"

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"If you need to go over an area again, get more shaving foam-- not that much-- and repeat the steps..."

"...this is...tricky..."

"With regular practice, you can improve any skill, Itadori-kun. Unless you'd like a beard, which still needs management, you'll be shaving every few days, or more."

"...you always...look so tidy..." swshswshswsh.

"It takes effort." Shhhick. Swsh.

"Yeah right. I bet you wake up like that. Tie and all."

A deep, rumbling laugh. Yuuji's foamy, surprised face, looking so boyish.

You slid past the bathroom. You pulled your phone out, surreptitiously clicking a photo. Kento and Yuuji, leaning over the sink while Kento steadfastly instructed him, became your new phone background, and stayed as such for a full year.

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"Took a lot of portions to send him to bed with a full tummy."

Kento chuckled at you, his hair mussed and soft. Legs crossed in bed, with a book on his lap, he read to the sound of soft snores in the guest bedroom next door. The lamplight, low and warm, illuminated Kento's face in the gloom.

Stubbly.

You reached a hand out, brushing across his jaw, feeling its sandpaper rasp across your fingers.

"I think you were so busy teaching Yuuji," you whispered, scratching Kento's chin as he crumpled his lower lip up, "that you missed some patches yourself. C'mere."

You stood, walking to the bathroom and sitting on the counter, grabbing a razor and shaving foam. Kento's eyes twinkled at you, feigning annoyance. He walked to you at the sink, looking straight into the bones of you. He grasped your thighs, pushing them apart before settling between them, chuckling again as you lathered his face.

Shhhhick. Swshswshswsh. Shhhick-ck-ck. Swshswshswsh.

You felt a growing pressure between your legs as you focused on shaving Kento's jaw. Kento fidgeted, pyjamas tight and tenting. You bit your lip, smirking.

"...Mr.Nanami. I am trying to concentrate."

"Mmm, so am I, but it's...hard."

"Yes. I can feel that."

Another deep rumble of a laugh. Kento grasped your thighs tighter, pressing forwards into you. You gasped, taking the razor from his face as Kento nuzzled shaving foam into your giggling neck.

"Don't stop." He whispered, a crooked smile on his lathered face. "Concentrate, please, Mrs.Nanami."

[erwinsvow]

do you think shy reader is still a bit skittish and shy when her and rafe are fucking?

hundred percent, but in a good way.

rafe had been thinking you were getting better at the whole skittish thing when you and him were in bed.

there was at least improvement from when you two had first started dating, even though you were the one constantly asking him to be rougher. at first when he tried, it was clear it was way too much for you.

that made sense to him—you were mentally interested in all kinds of shit that your physical body couldn't handle. but he knew it wouldn't always be like that, and the one he had learned best in this relationship with you was patience.

rafe hadn't expected that he would have to constantly be reminding you about that word though. horny and impatient as you are, rafe knows better than to give in and push your limits. things with you are sometimes one step forward, two steps backwards, and so he's decided for both of you how to proceed.

unfortunately, sometimes you make it hard to stay patient. a well-timed short skirt or pretty dress, even the way you flutter your eyelashes and smile shyly at him has him reconsidering.

like today.

your skirt was pushed up, panties somewhere between your knees, while your boyfriend railed into you from behind. this is one of those things you wanted, one of the times you were actually begging for it—which had resulted in cutting lunch short early and driving back home at double the speed limit.

you're folded over, hands gripping rafe's headboard and face pressed into his bed. all around you, the scent and feeling of rafe overwhelms every sense, and mind unable to think, you let out moans muffled by his pillow.

your stomach tightens with every deliberate thrust, walls clenching around rafe and making him groan from behind you. rafe's stretching you out exactly how you need, in such a way that it's almost too much. all of it is, his hand gripping your hip and the other on the back of your neck, holding you in place. the way you know if you looked back, you'd see your boyfriend looming over you, face twisted in pleasure, probably grunting dirty words that will make you blush.

"y'like that, kid? i bet you do-" it comes out in grunts, between thrusts. you moan out an answer, but then you realize what rafe is really talking about, feeling his hand on your sensitive clit, rubbing you roughly while your body spasms.

it's too much now if it wasn't already. you pull away from him, trying to crawl up the bed and escape the overstimulation. you grasp at sheets when you feel it.

rafe grips both your hips tightly and pulls you back to him, your hand loosening immediately as you're yanked back. holding you down, he keeps pounding into you.

"don't run from it, baby. you're fine."

and if rafe says you're fine, then you're fine.

[genderqueer-karma]

just remembered the fact that images are compressed for no fucking reason on mobile. fuck this site.