#I always limit myself with it with not listening to it too often because everytime I do I get teary eyed thinking about it

[snailvibes]

Thinking about calamari inkantation 3mix and getting emotional again

[vyl3tpwny]

A thought about the Music Process®

Prophet V Synthesizer, one of my favourite synthesizers ever. Ironically, this isn't about synthesizers, though. You'll see

—

I'm not actually sure what the most in depth way of saying any of this is. So I'd just like to consider it from my limited lexicon (pun intended, for my vintage reverb fans out there).

But the ways i think of it are like this:

Writing / Composition — The act of actually conceptualizing the music, composing it melodically, establishing parts for instruments, writing lyrics, etc.

Recording — Capturing any live performances such as guitars, vocals, drums, etc.

Sound Design — Depending on the genre, this may not be a thing. But for me, it's designing instruments from scratch, curating interesting instruments (possibly paired with some effect chains that sound cool), experimenting with sounds and musical phrases independently of a song's context, etc.

Production — Kind of a blend of the first three, but a sort of higher level of polish is involved and often involves taking each smaller idea and concept to a interesting and pristine level. Usually includes stuff like instrumentation as well.

Arranging — Deciding where all the elements go, when they come in, how they make their exit, etc.

Mixing — Using tools like EQ's, compressors, saturation, and other tools to make individual tracks/instruments/sounds work together in the context of a full song and establishing a distinct sonic style for the instruments and track as a whole.

Mastering — Taking a full mix of a song and doing similar things like with Mixing, except instead of applying these ideas to individual tracks, you're applying them to the song as a whole. Often this process involves trying to reach a target loudness for the song as well as make it as compatible as possible with other platforms, devices, and listening situations.

A lot of people think of these things as separate. In a lot of cases they are.

However. That is not how I do anything, actually. Most of these things, aside from mastering, sort of blend together for me. The writing process may yield sound design ideas, or vice versa. And I always find myself mixing while arranging and writing. And this sort of blending together of the parts of the "music process®" is common for independent musicians these days.

Traditionally, different roles are taken on by different people. Even one role can be taken up by multiple people; most bands do various parts of the writing and composition, while other engineers help with recording, production, mixing, mastering, etc.

Most independent musicians that find themselves taking on many or all of these roles usually admit to not enjoying most of the utilitarian, engineering aspects, and prefer to emphasize their passion for the abstractly creative part of the process (namely writing, recording, and sound design.)

I do every single aspect of my music, and I like it that way. I know that if something sucks, it's all on me and nobody else takes the fall. But if something is good... Well, that's all me too. And I'm super proud of that. But where a lot of people in my sort of position usually loathe half of the entire process, I shall confess—

—I really really really REALLY love the engineering part of everything. I love problem solving with my equipment and learning new things about it. I love trying to figure out how to make new musical ideas work cohesively with things. It's even harder for me than a lot of other people because I do as many genres as I can get my disgusting little hooves on. Engineering ideas and concepts shift depending on the genre, and so everytime I try something new, I also have to learn how to produce, arrange, mix, and master for it. AND I FUCKING LOVE IT.

Of all these things, though, the thing I really really adore the most is mixing. I usually don't do it as its own process; mixing usually is a part of the song creation process for me. It's like another aspect of sound design honestly. But I love fixing things in sound that doesn't work as it should properly. I love trying to figure out how to get all the tracks to fit together and feel coherent. AND I LOVE. THE TOOLS.

This is why I even wanted to discuss any of this. I love exploring and learning EQs and compressors and all sorts of things. I honestly want to talk more about it and use this space as a way to just ramble and maybe share my love for this stuff with people who have no idea what it is or no idea why to care or even find themselves intimidated at the thought of the engineering process.

I have a hyperfixation with audio dynamic compressors. I always warn people that if somehow the conversation we're having is steering towards engineering, specifically compressors, that they have to be super careful or else I won't shut the fuck up. I love them so much.

They all have so much personality and always have their own sound. That's the point.

API 2500 Stereo Bus Compressor

Manley VariMu Compressor/Limiter

Neve33609 Compressor/Limiter

HOW CAN YOU LOOK AT THESE AND NOT HAVE YOUR CURIOSITY PIQUED?? AUGH. I love the VU's (the meters with the needles) so much and they often are what define a compressor's visual vibe to me.

They all have software counterparts that I use (I can't ever afford a real physical hardware compressor lol they run in the thousands)

Universal Audio's API 2500 VST Plugin

Pulsar's MU VST Plugin

Arturia's Comp DIODE-609 VST Plugin

If you think about these tools like art tools, right. Different styles and brands of pens, pencils, markers, pastels, charcoals, clays, etc, all deal with the same basic concept and all attempt to fulfill a particular aspect of the process. But you also know that the differences between styles and brands are often huge. Despite all attempting to do the same thing, you know which ones will get you closest to the ideas in your head fastest depending on what the idea and situation is. Audio engineering tools are like that too, especially compressors.

Before computers, these were exclusively analog. Each compressor designed was uniquely flawed in it's own way. Once computers dominated the music making process, compressors went digital. For a while, people were excited to finally make digital compressors that were mathematically perfect. But we actually discovered that it killed the life of a lot of music as a result. The imperfections of analog compressors (and other audio equipment) is what made them unique.

Even if each one does the same thing, they all actually feel very different. And I just get so excited about it!

If you've come this far and actually don't know what an audio dynamics compressor is, that is impressive you stayed with me this long. A compressor in music is basically a device that allows you to manipulate the dynamic range of audio. That is a long winded way of saying you can take a sound and make the quieter parts louder, and the louder parts quieter. Or. You could do the inverse (called expansion). That, itself, is also a long winded way of saying: You can use compressors to make sounds punchier, or smoother, or more controlled, or more present, or more exciting, or beefier, or other descriptors in that vein. You can take a weak sounding kick drum and give it some actual punch and presence. You can take a vocal recording and squish it so that it's really up front and full of energy, helping it to rise above the other instruments without just turning the volume up.

Compressors are so important, that their use and application has — very early on — defined styles of music.

Here's an example where I create different dynamic feels for a drum track using Pulsar's 1178 VST Plugin. I won't describe how it sounds to me, I'm sure you can think in your own way about how the compressor is changing the sound!

I'd love to talk more about this stuff in the future.. let me know if you'd be interested in that. Because I can talk forever. Trust me.

I think I'll create a tag for any audio engineering nerd talk. I'll call it: #Vynamics

(Even if I'll talk about more than dynamics processing.. I think it works..)

Lmk what you think. Thanks <3 (Also I'm delegating #Vyop to be my personal post tag, so from now on you will be able to find all my own posts with that. I'll add this to my blog bio sometime.)

[compassionatereminders]

hi kat, i want to ask about an outsider's view on things concerning my partner and i. i feel like i lean a lot on my friends during times like these and i dont want to bother them again anymore, currently, about these issues.

my partner and i recently have been fighting a lot, about mundane things, usually stemming from me being pushed a little. i do agree that i may be a little too sensitive about certain things, and sometimes i become selfish. my familial relationships are rooted in emotional abuse so i had been closed off my whole life. sometimes i drop everything on him about things and he has his limits. this is because i often feel like if he likes me he will do anything for me even though theyre out of line.

his part of the family isnt great either, he had been exposed to physical abuse disguises as love afterwards, and he wants to leave as soon as he finishes his degree.

we have broken up before, due to miscommunication, he wants to sleep things off before talking and i take that as a personal insult when i cant help my emotions, i want to solve things before bed. however we have compromised sometimes, and things have been great.

the thing is i am half positive that we are often fighting recently due to us missing each other, we havent met each other in a month now, and it is the longest we have not seen each other in person. however, since he is still staying at his parents' house and hes not allowed to leave for trips unannounced unless he wants to get the consequences, we havent been able to cope well this vacation period.

i never mean to start a fight but recently everytime i say my feelings he has an issue with it. one time we had a plan to watch moviws together online, so i asked him to set a plan. and he did, however he turned up 35 minutes late and it greatly upset me. he informed me after we cooled down that he had been lectured by his parents and he couldnt message me during it. i understand that i had a fault in not perceiving things a lot, however i think the whole fight could have been avoided if he apologized and told me immediately afterqards the reason why. he had told me that i was too sensitive about it and that it wasnt his fault. i had let it pass because i do think its also true, given that i myself am also late sometimes.

yesterday, we had spent the day together playing online games and watching movies. however, by the time it was nightfall, i had felt down and i told him that i feel like the love i had received for the day wasnt enough and that i dont mean it as an offense to him. he said he loved me a lot the whole day and i should think back and cherish the moments we had. i dont even rememver what happened after that but we got into a huge fight, i just feel like i want some love and he should have just given it? instead of trying to tell me that im being ungrateful, because i dont think i am, i appreciated the whole day i just wanted to be cuddled to bed too, and i feel like we didnt connect a lot. he said i can never be content and will always want more than he can give, and then he had slept.

i understand that im sometimes asking for too much, but then again. i cant helo it sometimes and i dont mean to. i also dont want to accidentally start a fight every single time i feel a negative emotion.

i dont know what is happening to us and i just want someone to shine a light on what is happening. sorry for the long ask, i hope you have a good day. thanks for listening

There are no obvious red flags here in the sense that I don't get the impression that you OR your partner is doing something inherently abusive towards the other. But it seems like you both have your fair share of emotional issues and related trauma, and that you have a tendency to talk past and trigger each other. And the key to resolve it isn't in you forcing a discussion when he's asking for space, just like he doesn't get to just tell you to feel differently when you communicate unmet needs. So you have to decide whether there is still something worth fighting for in this connection, and then you both have to be willing to work on yourself and compromise and communicate. Because maintaining a relationship is hard work, especially during less than ideal circumstances, and whether you're both able to put in the work it would take to change this pattern is worth thinking about

[kirazdaha]

HAHAHAHA Every Turk Family has one of those names and unironically mine does too 🫡 Tell your mother thank you she is a very lovely lady

I know all of the artists you listed below because my dad blasts them on the radio everytime we go out... I call it old people music but hey I never said it was bad, they're awesome and I might have memorised some of the artist's songs from how much I listen to them... Barış Manço is a classic without a doubt! Fun fact my parents were able to go to his concert and got a signed picture with him I will always envy how lucky they were 😭 I love how women in the industry made the most iconic songs I hear them often in weddings too! Or clubs, even though I only went to one once I'm not very fond of them...

My questions were do you have any tips or inspiration with how you draw! I love your art and artstyle and it's honestly what I've been trying to achieve for a while, I can't believe I'm learning how to draw men because of a silly lawyer show it's a disease...

(We are just having a conversation at this point) (I feel like those people who speak out loud in public) (I hope you and anyone who's reading this is having a good day :) be kind to yourself and others everyone)

OH MY GOD i envy them too😭😭 also omg that sounds like heaven to me. the other day i went out partying and i felt sooo out of place because i only knew like 3 songs. omg it was so so bad.

hmmm tips and inspiration…. my number 1 tip would definitely be to look at a lot of other artists you like and analyze what exactly you like. and then try to emulate that in your own work. i try to look for inspiration everywhere - artists online, traditional artists, old masters, 3d artists, even theatre and poetry, etc. - doesnt mean that i am equally inspired by them all (because all these things at once sound so scary and big but they really arent!) but rather, i try to be open for anything and that helps me find inspiration :) 

ill try to explain my thoughts more under the cut because this got long:

for me for example, so far i only posted some art i made that was lined (which, i would say makes up maybe half of the art i draw - i mostly sketch and recently have been building up the courage to paint more) and one of my inspirations is meltow. i think if you go over and check out their art youll definitely see it lol. but also i love the clean look some comics have and my friends tell me my art looks like it belongs in a comic which, i guess yeah :) when it comes to colors and composition i LOVE this artists works. i still have a lot to learn and just looking at their works inspires me so much!!!

i will say i have ALWAYS struggled with lineart. its probably the worst thing in the world to me because it never feels right!!! i like lining on paper with harsh inks and stiff ink nibs that allow for like. very little variety in line weight, but i havent done that in over 3 years (i hope i can get back to that). but yes, something about lineart makes me feel so icky when i use any brush that reacts to the pressure you put on your tablet LOL i just hate it. ugh. i havent been able to work it out.

it was only in 2020 i think that i decided to try it out with a thick brush with some texture and no pen pressure. that probably was the first time i got actual lineart that (at the time) i liked done. and then later on, discovering that other artists are able to achieve beautiful drawings with similar brushes AND that lining with a very simple brush can feel so satisfying helped me evolve a lot! until 2022, i actually wasnt able to give my art the kind of finished look that i wanted. so what people consider my style is really just born out of my limits and working with them. that obviously doesnt mean that i dont try to challenge myself as much as i can. i do and i think everyone should! thats what makes art so fun

if theres any good advice i can give to a beginner itd probaaaaably be. okay this is difficult and i feel like im not really qualified for this. as a hobbyist much less so because a lot of the knowledge and skills i acquired was through an intuitive process (i could never stick with habits such as regular studies or warmups or whatever is meant to be good for you) which definitely isnt the most “productive” way but i mean it doesnt have to be. its just a hobby! you dont have to perfect art. but yes, i would definitely say dont stop drawing. youll always be your harshest critic and at the beginning, and especially if you begin at an older age because youve been training your eye your whole life but your drawing skills for only a relatively short time you will notice a lot of mistakes. and youll think you wont achieve the image you have in your head. and maybe you wont (because youll always strive for more and youll never really be satisfied as an artist bla bla) for a while. but you have to keep drawing! try out different strategies, find out how other artists draw, watch speedpaints, try out different papers and pencils, try everything that makes it more fun and keep going! it will all pay off!! 

in my eyes theres also no point in saying “i should wait till im better to draw this idea i have” because if inspiration strikes you you should use that. even though i still sometimes catch myself thinking like that. you can always redraw things later on!! if theres anything that will keep you drawing you should use that! like getting into shows and games that make me want to draw helps a ton LOL people are not joking when they say getting obsessed with one character is the quickest way to improve. i 100% agree!!! if you saw my first nachos you wouldnt even recognize him. not kidding wow this got long. thank you for the questions though!! i hope some of my rambling can help you. feel free to talk to me whenever!

[psalmsofpsychosis]

Yeah but the most hilarious thing a friend said about me was— I used to have a very dear friend who was hella intimidating to me, and i dont get easily intimidated. She was loud and outspoken and provocative, she loved a good fight and sought it, she was the only friend i had who i could happily challenge and provoke and get into her head because i knew she was absolutely secure in her own skin and rarely lost her ground, she loved being challenged. We were a formidable duo together, and there was this one time a guy jokingly asked her which one of us is scarier— she pointed to me without a second thought. It was so out of the blue and everyone, including me, turned around and was like ?????

because i assure you, i dont look scary, far from it in fact, and i can be loud, but it doesn't happen often. Most of my life i've been sitting in silence in a corner just listening. And i remember my friend laughing and saying that yes, she's loud and fiesty and she throws a fight and wrestles men every other Tuesday for the fuck of it, but really it's me people should be afraid of, because at the end of the day she plays along. She knows the rules, and she adapts to societal conventions, she works with people and she adheres to the implicit boundaries of different contexts (while screaming about how fucking stupid they are.) and sure, i dont look like much on the surface, and i'm mostly quiet and soft, but i don't negotiate. I dont play along and if i dont like something i'll flip the table on the game. She told the guy, "all things considered, i work with you and adapt one way or another; she doesn't adapt, she breaks through your thresholds."

And it's been 8 years and i still think about this remark. One of the most intimidating women i knew thought i'm the intimidating one because i'm a nonconformist, and so little has changed on that front. For the longest time she was resentful of me because she felt like i exist outside the rules and i think i'm exempt from them while she was stuck knee deep in societal conventions and "this is how things are done around here". I never really got it in my 20s, but now i think i do, which is to say; i pay my own price for willingly existing outside the thresholds of common protocols and societal codes of conduct, but that's just what i do. I never really learnt how to play along, and i guess i didn't want to, wasn't worth the effort. This isn't to say that i pick a fight with every single person i meet; quite the contrary, i dont respond to 98% of people i come in contact with, it's sort of a somewhat eternal state of "i dont care". I have very limited amount of energy, always did, so response is a privilege i only gift the people i absolutely love. The rest of the times i just leave, or if i decide to do something, i do it anyway, i throw myself into the thing without bothering to correct anyone or infouence their point of view.

But also, during the years i have met a select few people like me, and what always catches me offguard is, people dont tell you how much courage it takes to flip the table and go down the path everyone else is scared of. And i know this because i have met many cowards along the way too. People think that courage and bravery is the absence of fear. They think you must be so fearless in order to be an iconoclast, which is absolutely not the case; i have been afraid and vulnurable everyday of my life, i hear my bones rattle in my ears everytime i do the simplest tasks and i have always been thin-skinned, i get hurt very easily. And i always seem to pick up fights other people find impossible; it's not because i'm not terrified. Courage is not the absence of fear, it's the presence of purpose. You either have something that's important to you, something you want to accomplish, or you dont. Something either matters to you, or it doesn't, you cannot negotiate it. Everytime i flipped the table on things and said "i wont do that" "i will not become that" "this doesn't fucking sit with me" "i will not compromise" i was crying and i did it anyway, because my integrity as a person comes above societal conventions on any given day, and i dont fucking negotiate.

And the thing is, the older i get the less respect i have for cowards. I find value in fear, in uncertainty, in vulnurability, in grief, in pain, but nothing makes me lose faith in a person faster than "i want to do X, but i'm scared, so i'm not doing it." Lack of courage and resolve immediately makes me go "that's nice, good for you. You're lovely, and do take your time and go at your pace while you're detangling this yarn of yours, i know you got this, i believe in you even when you dont believe in yourself. But i dont have to be here while you do this, i dont have to exist besides people who choose their own manifactured comfortzone over change. " Because at the end of the day, i'm a noncomformist and i value change; not in pretty socially acceptable "oh i love change! let's have a discourse!" talks, but in action. Values are not pretty words, they're something that inherently translate into your behavior, you uphold them. And i think that's what makes me very scary to the average person; i dont talk about changing status quo, i bring it. And i dont care for standing besides people who dont really want anything to change after all because "that's scary and uncomfortable". Everything was scary and uncomfortable too when you were a toddler Jennifer, the difference was, back then you had courage.

[rachetlizzygrant]

My name is Joan Hensley and this is my story of the abuse I went through with Miyu Katsuki AKA Samuel Pugh

When I first met Miyu through a group chat me and a bunch of friends were in I was going through one of the worst breakups of my life that almost led me to suicide. Miyu offered me a hand through it and said to “forget that pussie” and to let her “kidnap me” for a while and stay with her. I took a Uber with Miyu (A round trip to and from my house was $78) to rain dogs. She was already being super flirtatious when we were video chatting and was very handsy on the ride there. When we got to the bar she automatically went inside and bought drinks (I myself don’t drink often because I smoke weed and drinking makes me sick) she pressured me into trying saki and other drinks until I was drunk (I’m a lightweight it takes one shot) and started love bombing me “you’re so beautiful” “I wish I looked like you” “I wish I passed that well” “your lips are gorgeous” shit like that. They offered to take me to a gay nightclub called incahoots and as we are walking she keeps dropping hints of marrying me and saying that I’m her property now. About a mile away from the nightclub she needed to piss and grabbed my wrist and led me beside a building where she forced me to ahem “hold it” while she did among other things… mind you I was still very drunk

When we went to the nightclub after she got me even more drunk with rumple shots and led me to the bathroom to “have some fun”

I don’t exactly remember what happened next.

We got a ride to her dorm and I (who was still drunk) was helping her vomit in the bathroom while she was apologizing for being “a POS drunk” after that I had a breakdown (I have bpd, ptsd, and autism) begging her not to treat me like my exes “I’ll never leave you, you’re mine now and we’ll always be together no matter what” she basically forced me to take a shower with her and I helped clean her up and get her to bed. After helping her in bed my memory stops. The next day when we woke up together she wanted to fuck me, I myself don’t like anal because it seriously hurts and makes me cry everytime. She pushed my head into the bed and you know what happened next.. it was all on video but I was too scared to say no. After that I fully convinced myself it was just a part of the CNC (consensual non consent) we had only talked about and not planned to do yet.

I can tell you now within a week I had Stockholm syndrome and my friends tried to tell me but I wouldn’t listen.

The 2nd week we were together miyu took my to a bar in the Springfield area called Shanty’s Town and we both proceeded to get hammered. She took me into the bathroom while I was on the phone with my bestfriend and I told her to “shut the fuck up” (my friend not miyu) miyu got angry with me and asked me to apologize. When I said no she grabbed me by the throat and took her gun cocked it and put it up my skirt (we were both still very drunk) and put her finger on the trigger, I still wouldn’t budge and she then took the gun and shoved it in my mouth and almost knocked out my tooth and said “don’t make me do it” then made me beg them to stop. After that I barely remember getting home and going to bed. Miyu also has connections with various criminal activities (such as but not limited to) murder, grand theft, grand theft auto, drugs, gang activities and other things that I have personally witnessed.

One night after this she got super drunk she had a “DID Switch” (I have multiple people that debunked this which is even more terrifying) and she started to look at me odd, she saw my breastplate as I was getting undressed and said “who are you? I don’t know you? you have titties! Can I touch them?” I went to take it off and she immediately stepped back and said “how did you do that? Are you a cannibal is that skin?” And reached for her hun. I who grew up in a very hard life hate guns and this scared the shit out of me. I tried to convince Magnum (the apparent personality) that I’m not a threat, I jumped on the bed and hid under the blankets out of pure fear and ptsd. I look at and he’s pointing the gun at me.. I had one of the worse mental breaks of my life that night.

Around December 15 she left to visit her “parents” in Baltimore. I didn’t hear back from miyu for 2 weeks and I got worried, I check her Snapchat which had pinged her location in her dorm in Jacksonville. I texted her asking “wtf?” And she swore up and down she was in zephyr hills at a family gathering and turned off her location immediately. A week later I’m on a date (me and miyu were in a open relationship) on New Year’s Day and I check my Snapchat and her location is now at the justice pub (they don’t ID her there so it’s her lost frequent place to drink) again. I called her and cussed her out left and right for lying to me once again. She swore up and down she had just gotten back and told me to come over. Not too long ago I broke up with her for my current boyfriend and I’m very glad I did

[anautumncarol]

Just had an idea so here we go.

Songs I like you can perform CPR to:

Disclaimer: this is taken into a 97-103 bpm since even if it's 100 bpm, stayin alive (the most common example) is at 103~104 bpm so I'm comfortable enough giving myself a ±3 bpm margin.

1. Chronosaurus - SKZ, if I ever need CPR, you better be singing this as you do it. Also this is arguably at 200 bpm but I do prefer 100 as it's just easier to keep track of.

2. Side effects - SKZ, this one is at 97bpm so at the limit but if you want to use it as a reference, it may be better if you do it a bit quicker than original tempo.

3. Awkward Silence - SKZ, okay so this is technically 200 bpm BUT that means it also works at 100 bpm so I'm gonna count it here.

4. Question - SKZ, I don't listen to this one often but I still enjoy it so it's here.

5. Fascination Street - The Cure, THIS SONG IS SO FREAKING GOOD OMG but I doubt it is the best for CPR considering the beat isn't the most obvious. But it is exactly 100 so that's something.

6. Never Enough - The Cure, The problem is I reckon not everyone will think of this song first when someone needs CPR but you get bonus cool factor if you do. Also it's at 101 which gets another bonus point for a palindromic number.

7. In Your Room - Depeche Mode, again, another one that may be hard to do it to but damn is this song amazing.

8. Saint Bernard - Lincoln, the fact Lincoln has one makes me so happy since I am number 1 Lincoln trash but yeah, may be hard to do it since at the beginning the drum thing actually fall every two beats so you might end up doing it twice too slow.

9. Saturday - Fall Out Boy, these last songs will be FOB songs since I love them and the first one is an old one with a bpm of 98.

10. Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner, Fall Out Boy, I do have to point out this only applies to the futct version as the mhwabtbstmt version is at 93bpm.

11. This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race, Fall Out Boy, okay so once again cheating, this song is at 200 bpm so you just have to do it every two beats.

12. I'm Like A Lawyer With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get You Off (ME & You) - Fall Out Boy, this song is really cute as well so I'd definitely say yes to being "resurrected" with this one. Although I do have to note it is at the limit (97 bpm).

13. 20 Dollar Nose Bleed - Fall Out Boy, This song actually has one of my favourite drum moments ever so let's go lads. Also at 99 and I think my friend who likes astrology told me that meant soemthing but I honestly don't care enough to know what.

Honorable Mentions (a.k.a. 3 songs that were at 104 bpm):

1. Silent Cry - SKZ, I'm lowkey disappointed because everytime I listen to this song I just think of Han being really into it so I wish it had made it onto the list but life isn't fair.

2. Leave Me Alone - IDKHBTFM, Oh how I wish Dallon could have appeared on the list and yet here we are. If I ever make a part 2 I will go through some brobecks song but none in the IDKHOW repertoire made it (from the ones I listen to anyway).

3. How It's Going To Be - Gerard Way, I am so happy I at least got to mention this one because it is so good I could go on for days about it. 1000000000/10 would recommend.

[satoriberry]

heyy^^ could I ask for a romantic match up with a haikyuu boy? ://)

I'm a girl and use she/they pronouns (but I prefer they/them), I'm 18 and I'm demi- & pansexual.

I'm an entp/intp and I'd say I'm a open minded and kinda funny person. I tend to be extremely shy when I'm not comfortable with people but when I'm with people I trust I'm the most extrovert person in the room.

When people annoy me or hurt people I love I can get damn mad in seconds.

Others say I'm very loyal and a good listener. They also see me as responsible (and I dont understand why, because I act kinda childish sometimes)

If I'm interested in something I can lose myself in it really quickly.

I really like science (especially chemistry & astronomy) and video games and my hobbies are skying, skating, volleyball and cooking.

My favourite song changes from time to time but some of my all time favourites are video games (by the young professionals) and serotonin (by girl in red)

Thank you so much and have a nice day!

A mystery person looking for love chose me as their matchmaker! Let's see what they're getting...

↬ Berry's note: thank you for sending in a request lovely anon!! also dw, i got your second message so its all good ( ๑>ᴗ<๑ )

You've been destined to be with none other than charismatic Oikawa Tooru himself! Wanna learn more?

- First of all, you two make such a cute duo [jealous] </3

- BUT LET'S GET INTO IT! First of all, getting to know each other. You're shy with strangers, right? Oikawa's perfect for that! He's such a lively and extroverted boy, so he tends to start conversations with people (and keep then going).

- The way he first notices you, it could've been anything. Maybe he saw you sitting alone reading, maybe you were discussing practice with your volleyball teammates (if you're in the club) or maybe he just overheard you making a really funny joke with a friend.

- Whatever it was, it caught his interest so he approached you once before his volleyball practice started. You were caught off guard because 1) wait omg no he's talking to me and 2) omg it's oikawa? Not blushy kind of shy, you just weren't expecting his company.

- He looked so jolly (and for what?) while asking you questions to get to know you. Your name, class, extracurricular activities, mutual friends possibly? He rambled on and on to prolong his time with you that he didn't sense Iwaizumi walking up behind him.

- "Y'know that one old chemistry teacher? I had her this morning and sh- OUCH??"

- Yeah, Iwaizumi used Volleyball-to-the-head™, it was super effective. Needless to say, he had to leave but before leaving, he waved you goodbye with a huge grin.

- After this first meeting, you two started to interact more and more often. After getting to know you, he discovered that not only are you nice and really friendly, you're genuinely so funny and being around is never a bore.

- You two have the same childish humour, and sometimes it's like you two mentally communicate elaborate bullshit ideas every 2 seconds (please leave iwaizumi alone, he'll die if Oikawa and Oikawa's partner in crime start to mess around)

- He likes to take you out on nature walks or stargazing, and if he's feeling funky, he'll take you to an arcade. He'll try to impress you by attempting to win a 10k token plushie (he didn't succeed in the end, instead, you won a duck plushie and gave it to him).

- And it's not surprising that at this rate, he started to really like you <3

- And after a while, he confessed his feelings to you. He didn't leave out the parts on how seeing you walk through the school gate always made him feel giddy, how he would giggle when he reads your messages, how gazing at your face while you do your homework in his room always sent his heart into a frenzy. He really poured his heart out.

- And let's just say, you two hit it off >:]

- Now let's start with the adorable stuff <3

- Ok first of all, TREATS YOU LIKE A GODDESS AND WILL NEVER DISRESPECT YOU. SERIOUSLY!!! You mean so much to him so he wouldn't even imagine hurting you in anyway :(

- LOVES taking walks with you in parks and around ponds. Will hold your hand the entire time (kisses the back of your palm before doing it <3)

- PLANETARIUM DATES!!! If I'm not wrong, it's canon he likes aliens, and you like astronomy right? Perfect sense to buy two tickets and spend your day in a planetarium together. His eyes would be like saucers the entire time and everytime 5 minutes, he goes, "Oh my god Y/N-chan, look at these!!! :0"

- During school days, will frequently invite you over to his house to spend time together, play video games, watch silly videos, watch reality TV together or volleyball matches when he feels like it.

- Speaking of volleyball, he'll bring you with him to practice! Will wink at you continuously and shows off his skills (pls cheer for him). If he's up to it, he'll play a 1-1 with you in the local neighbourhood park on your way back home.

- THINKS YOU'RE SO COOL WHEN SKATING!!! YOU COULD BE FALLING OFF AND HE'LL GO, "Omg Y/N you're so awesome :D!". PLEASE TEACH HIM TOO!

- Even the basics are enough for him. Also if you hold his hands while guiding him, chances are he'll start to blush. You're just so impressive and the praise you're giving him is too much for his heart to handle <3

- Ok ok, we all know Oikawa has a problem with limiting himself and always overworks himself. He's aware of that, but he doesn't think anyone wants to hear him talk about it.

- Except, you're there for him. It takes him a while to open up but, after he does, he never goes one day without thanking you. For reassuring, for scolding him when he needs it, for caressing him whenever he gets injured. For being there for him :]

- In return, he'll shower you with so much affection and loving words. He'll always check up on you, whether or not something bad happens.

- Reminds you of things if you forget them! You lost your notebook? He'll help you rewrite your notes and lessons. You have an important assignment due tomorrow? He'll help you with it, even if it means half-assing it. He's always there to assist you and make your life easier, just like how you made him happier.

- In conclusion, Oikawa would fly to the moon and back just to see you happy <3.

Runner ups!

➵ Sugawara Koushi (was so close to choosing him)

➵ Kozume Kenma

➵ Kuroo Tetsurou

↬ Berry's after-writing note: *fucking dies* MY BAKER AND FLOWER LOVING S/O POSTS WERE SO LOVED??? HELP???? THANK YALL SO MUCH. also thank you so much for sending in your request anon!!! mwah mwah :>

[mnxxlove]

POURED DAISIES #1 #2

Pairing: Harry Styles

Prompts:

11; multi chapter

16; just fluff

20; soulmates as friends or lovers

AU; picnic date

AU; rainy day

Word Count: 3327

Summary: It’s late September, Y/n and Harry have decided to make a picnic, in one of their favourite locations. He has been away for almost six months, having also on count that he has been really busy working in his new album. Reader supposes that they were going to do such as the other times, having a snack, listening to some music singing with his guitar, and even if it sounded unbelievably corny, taking pictures of themselves there. But he had in mind prepared something more exciting.

warnings: a lot of fluffiness, a bit of angst but it’s a little I promise.

author’s note: I wanted to make this short story because I’ve been trying to search for anything alike, but sadly, as far as I know, there weren’t any fanfiction or imagines. But no worries, I made one myself. For the moment, it only will have two chapters. If you want me to tag u, please tell me 🌼

•From me; to all of you. 🥰

gif not mine

It was Friday in the afternoon, he was driving on it’s way to her house, and as much as Harry desired that day to be as sunny as possible, it was actually very much cloudy. But still, that wasn’t enough of an excuse for them to cancel their most wanted date. They have been apart for almost six months. And although they used to call each other every few days, they still had to work, which was always a big issue that kept them separated for a long period of time… But luckily, he has already finished the album which he had taken some time in. And knowing that he was going to be back in town, they decided to make plans, but somehow what, at the end he couldn’t make it. She was a bit disappointed, but not angry as he expected her to be. And even when she made clear, the fact that it was fine, he knew it wasn’t. And that she was just trying to be kind with him, something that he really appreciated, although he just right deep down, just knew it wasn’t right...

His thumbs played cheerfully on the black leather wheel, while he enjoyed the instrumental of one of his favourite songs. Harry was feeling calmed, but at the same time, he could swear that if happiness was his superpower, he would be already touching the grey clouds of the sky. There was a sweet grin, curving his thin lips most of the time, but he couldn’t help but giggle, once so often to himself. He was feeling like a complete teenager, and it has been so long, ever since the last time, he has ever felt that way. Part of him wanted to scream of excitement, but the other part just wanted to run and hide under his bed, just when he used to do when he was younger. But he knew, he needed to do it. They made plans two weeks ago, but he got distracted with his family, and knowing he wouldn’t be able to make it, he warned her five hours before the hour they chose, to meet each other at the cafeteria. He felt bad for it, but he wanted to spend the rest of the day with his family, most specifically his sister, which was going to go on vacation for a few days. When he cancelled their plans for that day, Harry thought about giving her an excuse, but at the end, he just apologised. But he was going to compensate her today. He just asked her if it was possible for her to be out for the rest of the day and to dress comfy. Y/n had no idea where he was going to take her to, and she hated surprises so badly, and he knew it, which it was even funnier for him to do so.

Her neighbourhood wasn’t far away from his childhood house, but he still insisted on picking her up. Even if they were only ten minutes away, he always used to take the long way to her house, and even though he always did it, she still made it after him. Y/n always being the one finding him parked outside her house. But this time was different. He didn’t take the long road, he went for the shortest one instead. However, even if he was already picturing himself waiting for her outside the car.

The moment his car passed by, he saw her sitting on the porch waiting for him. Her hair was longer, and as she had told him a few months ago, she had lost a little weight, because of the stress that she needed to deal with, these past few months. A lot of stuff happened, he left and she stayed, but their lives kept going and the world kept rotating. Meaning, that it has been longer than he ever expected. Harry didn’t even think about it, and he parked the car. Making her to immediately raise her chin. Clumsily, he got out of his car and once he got out, he closed it behind him, Harry walked rapidly towards her, and so did she, almost tripping on the way. Laughing, they embraced each other.

“Oh my god! You look lovely, Harry.” She mumbled, her voice being way more higher-pitched than normal.

Harry was having his back a bit bend, because of their noticeable, different height difference. Arms kept her close to his chest, his chin was rested on her left shoulder, whereas Y/n kept herself closer to him, her short arms passed by his back, the sleeves of her oversized cardigan hiding her wrists. She was having her head rested on his chest, and meanwhile she was having her eyes closed and a big grin marked on her face, he was having his eyes closed while he just couldn’t help but to feel himself fade away with the sweet smell of her perfume.

“I missed you like crazy.” Harry whispered, while caressing her back with one of his hands.

Just after that, they didn’t say anything else. And it was at that precise moment, that they then, began to feel alright again. Not just the feeling of home came back just to him, but for her again. And even if she wouldn’t ever admit it out loud, she needed him more than ever. There wasn’t anyone that could be compared, and if that was possible they weren’t interested in finding it. Both feeling flustered, just decided to break the long embrace, they formed a few minutes ago.

On one hand, he was grinning, a big smile from ear to ear. His green eyes shining, bright as crystal, letting her know that he was moved by the situation. And on the other hand, she just looked at him in the same way, but the only difference was that she was hiding her big smile behind her hands, that were pressed together and just placed on her mouth shyly. Harry let out a chuckle which Y/n shared too. Bowing his head a bit, he just took a step towards her, to then, holding both her hands. It felt unbelievably good being together again, and they just looked at each other happily. Harry stretched their arms, and he saw her up and down and he just smiled, heart eyes staring directly to her.

“I was tired of looking at pictures. It’s just not the same...” He affirmed softly, which just made her to bow her head to a side, shocking her head.

They couldn’t picture each other as a third person would, but if they could, they would definitely melt.

They looked like children in love, and they had no idea.

“Where are you taking me?” She giggled, walking straight to the co-pilot seat that was on the right side of the car. Harry didn’t give her an answer. He just limited himself to hum while rolling his eyes instead.

Y/n not getting anything back, she turned around on her feet, now staring at him in the eyes, her head being now raised. Before saying anything, he stared at her, his eyes narrowed.

“I can’t tell.” He gasped and she nodded, letting out a sigh.

“Hey, it is alright. You’ll love it!” His voice softened this time. Y/n knew, that he was aware that she hated surprises. But he did it only because he knew she’d love it… And that is mostly the only excuse he always had in mind, to make her a surprise.

“Trust me, love.” He added, now helping her with the door. Y/n gazed at him, eyes now narrowed.

She was feeling quite too intrigued but still, she had no idea where they were going or even, what they were going to do… Once, Y/n was in, she turned her head, and she saw on the backseats his guitar, with a green notebook and a purple pen. She wondered if there’s a chance that he has been writing or composing lately. But knowing it was private, she preferred to not ask. When he opened the door, she just pretended to put on her seatbelt, to then, staring up at him.

The ride didn’t feel long, or at least, thirty minutes beside him felt like that. The car was silent, the only thing that it could be heard was the music sounding, leaving it as a good background music.

It was delicate and it felt slowed down... Being with him felt peaceful, loving and exciting such as it always felt like it. If it weren’t because they have made memories not including each other, it would feel like they have never gotten separated. Harry loved it. Being with her again felt fresh and homelike, but even if it felt heart-whelming, it also was heartbreaking, just thinking that he would be gone again in a few months. Which by just having that kind of thought running around his mind, made his mood to change drastically. He wasn’t smiling anymore, and he was now looking straight at the highway and it’s traffic signs. His jaw was tightened and a frown was formed within seconds.

“What’s wrong?” Her voice disconcerted him, making him turn his head, to gaze at her for a split of a second.

“It’s just… Everytime I come back, it makes it harder for me to go.” He let out a deep sigh.

She wasn’t expecting that answer, which at first left her speechless, but she then just placed her cold hand on his, which was placed on the gear lever. Y/n understood how difficult it could be for him. He was alone most of the time, and the only close persons he really had after his family was her. And sadly, they were always far away from him, which always broke him.

“One day, you’ll have to go and never come back in a longer period than just six months…” She added, thinking it would be good. But she was wrong.

“Are you trying to make me sadder?” He cut her ironically, having both his eyebrows raised in expectation.

“Of course not, you silly... I’m just saying that sooner or later, you’ll find the way to get away with this.” Y/n continued, but he just scoffed mentally.

“I’ll never find a way to get away with this. This my home, and it’ll always be my home. The people I love the most are here. And I’ll never forget it.” Harry affirmed, her hand slightly gripping his own.

“...I missed you too.” She suddenly said, copying the same four words he had told her, when his arms were embracing her tightly. Harry just opened his hand, his fingers stretching before her hand, so she could intertwine her fingers with his own.

Before they would notice, they were already approaching the old field, they were used to go often, when they were way much younger. At some point they just decided to stop going. Which they didn’t even know when that happened... The last time they went there was a day before he left London, and it’s been six months. They expected it to look the same, mostly her, but it looked differently... It wasn’t freshed cut as always. And it seemed that it had bloomed flower, after all.

“This cannot be real. You really got us back here?” She told, eyes staring straight at her window.

Harry hearing how happy she turned, it made him happy too. But, somehow, that mix of nostalgia couldn’t fade away...

Just when he parked the car, both got out of the vehicle. And they helped each other place everything up. Just when everything was placed, they sat down on the big white cloth.

“I wanted it to be sunny, but the Sun just decided to not cooperate today.” He scoffed, to then take the basket that was just at the edge from where they were sitting.

“I like it cloudy.” Y/n smiled, not taking her eyes off the field. Feeling herself free, she closed her eyes and calmed, she breathed in deeply, to then letting out all the air. The dampness in the air mixed with the smell of flowers and glass made her smile. And Harry noticed, not helping it but grinning, too then looking down. He opened a few crystal Tupperwares, and he left them there, the tape just being left on. There were seasonal fruits, such as blueberries, the seeds of the pomegranate and white grapes which were their favourite. They were also sandwiches and cookies which he dedicated to prepare just for themselves. And knowing how much she loved the cake he always prepares, he brought some just for her.

“Oh, I love you, I freaking love you.” She repeated after taking a bite of the cake. Harry just let out a guffaw once she told that.

“I know you’d like it.” He laughed.

“I meant you, but ok.” Y/n joked, blinking in surprise.

Still eating, she saw how he grabbed his Polaroid camera, and before he would take the picture she just tried to pose, her eyes were wide opened, both her hands holding the little piece of cake with frosting on it.

It was a surprise picture, and even if she wouldn’t like it, she knew it would be a memory and she really didn’t care if she looked bad or anything, because they were the only ones who had those pictures.

“Does it look good?” Y/n joked, leaving the rest of the cake inside the Tupperware, to then, cleaning her hands with a paper tissue that was inside the basket.

“Adorable.” He affirmed, and she just shocked her head.

The minutes passed and within the sky turned way more darker, letting them believe that it was possibly that it was going to rain. But they just didn’t care.

“I thought about it... I brought a parasol, don’t worry.” He added, rapidly standing up from the cloth, to then getting closer to the car. Y/n turned her head around, to look at him. Without thinking if he would require any help, she just stood up.

Luckily they put it on, and sat just when it felt like it was about to rain. And that’s when he then decided it was going to be an excellent moment to take his guitar, at first he started to improvise, but he then decided to take it seriously. She was laying down, on the white cotton fabric cloth, using both her forearms as a pillow. His voice sounded deep but soothing at the same time. And it was relaxing to hear him sing with the rain in the background. He had his eyes closed most of the time, or at least they were until she took the camera to then take a picture of him. When the flash sounded he opened his eyes abruptly, to then getting flustered, her cheeks flushed.

“Just stop your crying, It'll be alright.. They told me that the end is near. We gotta get away from here. Remember, everything will be alright. We can meet again somewhere. Somewhere far away from here... We never learn, we've been here before. Why are we always stuck and running from.. The bullets, the bullets…?” He sang, his voice mixing with the raindrops collapsing to the waterproof parasol.

It was heavenly peaceful, and she couldn’t stop staring at him.

“...Wanna join me?” He continued playing, and she just nodded, but just after Harry gave her the signal to sing the chorus, the cold wind brushed the field. The smell of lavender embraced them, and not expecting it, luckily they were lucky enough to behold the most wonderful thing, such as how millions of daisies were plucked, and just flew towards them, leaving them having the white cloth covered with daisies and a few lavenders. They looked amazed, it was the very first time in their entire lives that they’ve ever seen that happen in real life. And even if they got a bit wet because of the wind mixed with rain, they loved it still.

Harry stopped playing his guitar, just at the exact moment the flowers started to fly. It was one of those special moments, which anyone would like to take a picture of, to remember it. But they just stared at it hopeful, trying to keep that feeling of freedom and live. Keeping his breath, he left his instrument aside, to then look at her. She just stared at her, eyes wide opened.

She looked beautiful, her hair wasn’t disheveled as she expected it to be. It was more likely brushed, and left falling behind her back. But what she wasn’t able to see was that there were petals and a few flowers lying on a few strands of her hair.

“Do not dare to move.” He demanded which made her stay firm but scared at the same time.

“Do I have a bug on my hair?” Y/n low voice stuttered.

Harry just took the camera and took a pic of her.

“Two bugs?...-Three??” She continued, still being scared. Y/n tried to touch her hair with her fingertips, but was too unsure to touch it. Harry then held both her hands and made her approach. Y/n just took a few steps with both her knees and she then sat in front of him.

“Take it off, please.” She sighed, closing her eyes tightly. Which he just found completely adorable.

Delicately, he collected the petals and the few flowers that were still in her hair, and he left them on one of the palm of his hands.

“Look.” Harry added, showing her his hand. But she didn’t look at it.

“Are you crazy? I’m not going to look!” She overreacted, which made him smirk.

“Ok… Then, smell it.” He affirmed, making her frown ironically. Sighing, she just bowed her head and not after swallowing hard, she then moved her head towards him, her chin being now raised. Harry just held one little daisy and he took it carefully near her nose.

Shyly, Y/n smelled the flower and just let out a chuckle.

“It’s a freaking flower!” Y/n laughed, opening her eyes.

She felt embarrassed but she just decided to laugh while lowering her head.

“You had this all over your hair.” Harry smiled, looking down at the flower. He rounded it on his fingers, making the white petals dance, repeatedly in circles.

Without thinking about it, she just stood up on her knees to then embrace him. Harry didn’t expected her to do that, and even if for first seconds he could be able to hold her, he just let himself fall backwards, having her held tight to him. They spend more than five minutes just laughing to themselves, and they then just stay in that same composure for a long period of time.

Both his arms were placed around her back, and once in a while he would caress her back trying to comfort her. Meanwhile, on the other hand, she was resting her head and chest on him.

“Do you wanna stay the night at my place?” He whispered and she just raised her head now finding him looking down, so he could see her. Y/n just nodded her head slightly. They kept eye contact for a split of a second, to then hide her face in his brown jumper. Feeling a bit awkward, she tried to move but Harry didn’t let her.

“I don’t wanna leave. Not just now.” He sighed, his chest lowered after her.

“Just one more minute…” Harry added lowly, while looking straight up to the clouds, who were still looking dark-grey and dense. Y/n didn’t hesitate, in fact she liked to be with him like that. And she didn’t want the seconds and minutes to pass. But it always did.

[duchessfics]

Hi! The one you posted so far is so good and clearly a lot of effort was put into it, so I'm very excited!!

Physical: I'm 5'3/5'4, black hair, brown eyes bc I'm asian

Dem quirks: I like semi-horror things. Is that a thing? Gore, thrill, mystery. But not necessarily jumpscares. I also like analyzing film and literature, learning and immersing myself in different cultures, and just being a performer; singing, dancing, acting. Which leads me to my hopes for the future: I'd love to perform for a living, one day, and just live in a nice apartment. Big enough to dance around, but small enough to have fun just cleaning on the weekends!

Personality-wise: I'm a pretty loud person when I'm around people I like but really, I like being alone and just quiet, which people don't really expect. I'm also very sentimental, like the kind to keep old ticket stubs and stuff. What's funny is that I have a somewhat narcissistic nature, but at the same time I have this need to take care of people; shower them with gifts and compliments, always give hugs, stuff like that!

Hope that helps, thank you!!

Salutations! 😄 Thank you very much for the kind words. I guess I just like playing matchmaker for people and now it’s your turn! For you I think you would do well with...

Audrey Tindall! 

(I know I used her as Shelby in some gifs, but technically it’s still Audrey so...😅)

And here's a couple songs to set the mood:

La Vie En Rose--Emily Watts

Adore You--Harry Styles

Your Love--Little Mix

Toothbrush--DNCE

Physical--Dua Lipa

Alright, so you first meet Audrey on a set when working together. Your character is the best friend of Audrey’s character. While this is your biggest gig yet and the pressure is on to do well you rise to the challenge. In fact the chemistry between you two on camera is electric.

To the point that you exchange numbers to text each other after this is done. You’re able to keep a confident, at ease persona when she gives her number. But on the inside you are shocked that Audrey would want to continue talking to you. Little do you know the actress herself is shocked you would want to text her.

In the beginning you and Audrey text once or twice a day at the most. But as time goes on, without either of you being fully aware, the people around you both notice the increase in texting on your phone.

After getting to know Audrey better you learn that she has struggled with dyslexia since primary school. So she often sends voice notes to you rather than texting bace the long responses she wants to give.

Your favorite voice notes are her “good morning” ones where her voice is lower pitched and still husky from sleep as she wishes you a wonderful morning and says her plans for the day.

Because both of you work around people, the idea of going to a crowded place in public, especially for Audrey, doesn’t hold a lot of appeal. But Audrey wants to show her care for you so three months after initially meeting she reserves a private section at a hollywood restaurant and takes you on a date.

Both of you easily fall into an easy back and forth conversation and you end up spending the night at her place. While Audrey is chomping at the bit to climb all over you, you help her to slow down and savor in the moments of just being together.

One of you most intimate moments is when Audrey comes over to your home and you show her your hope chest filled with trinkets of past memories and a couple items for your dream future. In the beginning you tell Audrey she doesn’t have to listen to you ramble, but she’s happy to. And in that moment you realize you’ve fallen in love with her.

Your first “public debut” as a couple is attending an awards show together. You both put on a confident front, but by them time you get home, both of you admit the whole thing was a little nerve-wracking.

You never pop the question about moving in. It’s more like everytime you go to leave, Audrey pleads for you to stay, puppy dog eyes and all. So you slowly bring over more and more and when it comes time for you to renew your lease, you take the leap to move in with Audrey.

Now--Audrey may be older than you, but you love caring for your sunshine. You’ll send flowers to her on set on random days, jot down encouraging notes in her scripts to help if she gets frustrated about her dyslexia, and you make sure to have her favorite English snacks at home because American food is too sweet or too salty.

Audrey is not a fan of scary things. However you know she must love you when she hesitantly agrees you watch some of your favorite horror movies/TV shows. And it makes the experience less intense when you keep pausing what you’re watching to point out and analyze different filming and plot choices.

After being together for awhile, Audrey notices that even though you’re an excellent actress/ singer/ dancer, you’re opportunities are significantly more limited that hers. And you decide it's time to sit down and have a talk with Audrey about her privilege as a white woman in Hollywood.

The conversation isn’t easy, but Audrey lets you speak about your experiences without having to “prove” or “justify” them in a digestible way to her. She wants to listen and learn and it pushes her to do some of her own research to gain a better understanding. Ultimately Audrey loves you dearly and wants you to know she is eager to learn and grow. And she will support you in any and every way she can.

I hope you like your pairing! If you would like to be paired yourself feel free to send in an ask or submit a post!.

[blueroan-equestrian]

What’s Left Unsaid

Ch 1

Geralt was my everything but I barely showed up on his radar. I was simply someone who he brings along as a means of keeping the peace in towns. Apparently when I am with him, the town’s people tend to trust him more. I made it easier for him to obtain jobs that was it... that and he no longer had to make his own potions. The only times he would intentionally interacted with me was when he needs a potion made and when I need coin.

I don’t know why I put up with it... but I guess I like the sameness in what he does even though we’re in different places with different problems. It’s change that I can prepare for. Plus job security... I don’t ever want for anything. There is always enough. Except love and affection as he gives all his to the woman in brothels we come across in our travels.

Like usual when he returned from his trist, I was in bed... but this time I wasn’t actually asleep this time like normal but I kept my eyes shut. I could feel the bed dip under his weight. I listened to him take off his boots followed by his pants and shirt. But what happened next was a surprise. He laid down spooning me with his arm wrapped around me. He kisses my shoulder, “You always look so peaceful when you sleep... especially after I come back from... I find myself picking women who look like you....before I wasn’t picky... I needed the scratch itched and that is all back before I met you ... then I met you ... but I can’t say anything and it kills me... it kills me everytime that you look like you’ve got hurt by something... but I’ve let myself get too attached to you... I need to let you go before I lose you and can’t move on... This will be the last time I feel your warmth...”

I finally find my voice even though it’s meek, “Don’t say that.” Tears began to well in my eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, I’m a sorceress; I’m not dying anytime soon.”

“That’s not... not what I meant... I didn’t know you were awake... you’re heart was so steady.”

“Geralt...?” I began to ask but I stopped.

He leans over to look at me, “What?”

“The reason I look like I’m hurt is because I’m jealous when I shouldn’t be.”

He lowered himself closer to my face, “Your jealous? Jealous of what?”

“The girls who you give your affection to... the girls who you acknowledge even a little because it’s more than you acknowledge me.” I whispered.

“I don’t understand... I don’t really give those women my attention or affection... The most attention I give them is to see if I can fuck them... and there’s no affection to it.”

I got quiet and Geralt laid back down. I let a few moments go by before speaking back up, “Do you talk to me when I am asleep often?”

Geralt kept his arm over me as we laid together, “Yeah ... as much as I would like to deny it, I do.”

“What do you talk about?”

I could hear him shift unconfortably, “I don’t know... different things...”

“Could you give me an example or two?”

He heaved a heavy sigh, “Well I’ve talked about how you handled a situation so well or how I love how you just know what I need for a job and have it ready before I ask. How you seem to have it all figured out.”

I turned to face him, “Why haven’t you told me?”

“I have.”

“Not while I was aware?” I giggled.

“I’m a Witcher and I’ve been told many times that I’m not supposed to be able to feel... but when I look at you I do and I don’t know how to explain it and I don’t know if it’s what it is or not... I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to mess up what we have.”

“So you’re just going to ignore me like I don’t matter and fuck girls who look like me?”

Geralts eyes widened and there was a bit of panic to it, “(y/n)! (Y/n) you are the best thing to ever come into my life! I... guess I was just being a coward.”

I lean forward and press my forehead to his, “Geralt of Rivia a coward? I don’t think so.”

Geralts eyes looked into mine as if they were searching for a sign of lies, “I guess I should have been more open with you.”

“Me too... I could have said something too.” I whispered getting even closer.

His eyes dart down to my lips, “We should get some rest... we have... we have a early start tomorrow.”

I sigh, “We do... good night Geralt.”

.....

Geralt wakes me up in the morning and we pack up and get ready to leave. Geralt throws me up on Roach and begins to lead her.

He walks beside her well beyond the city limits, “Can we talk... about last night?” I asked tentatively.

Geralt looks up at me, “What’s there to there to talk about?”

“Do you like me?”

“Yes.” He says in a monotone voice.

“What do you like about me?”

“Your eyes.”

“What about them?”

Geralt groans, “I don’t know...they dance? Now can we just walk in silence. Please.”

“Okay...” I mumbled almost in defeat. He didn’t notice and I know I should expect that from him but he had a whole conversation with, my thought to be, sleeping body... Why couldn’t he discuss it now? Maybe I was just a convenience to him... or just something that makes his life easier... like an accessory. Perhaps I need to step away for a while and figure out what I want and how I will get what I need. When Geralt goes to profill his next job, I could decide what that means exactly.

ch 2

https://blueroan-equestrian.tumblr.com/post/630360235033378816/whats-left-unsaid-2

[enha-woodzies]

this is a mutuals mention game! u need to mention one or more mutuals that come to your mind at first when you read the following words (per word): flower, angel, love, chocolate, sweet, cute, gorgeous, fun, sun, moon and stars 💓

it's been a while since i've got another one of these... and i know i should just tag my moots but i can't go on without stating why cos there are valid reasons as to why i've thought of them that way. soo,, here we go~

🌼 flower :: @berrywoo i can't stress this enough you've always been a flower to me besides your name ofc and you're an icon of growth and genuine beauty. no matter how much people trample down on you, you still rise up with strength and beauty and humility. you show them your true self and how we all can be very vulnerable despite feeling all sunshine-y and you definitely put them where they rightfully belong. words can't even explain how pure you are 😘 i just love you so much

👼 angel :: @fluffi ayee pumpkin~ ma child <33 always exuding a bright beam of light and softness, a precious lil one 🥺 goal-directed and driven and what else? needs no effort to brighten up your day, it's just so easy with her that you'll end your day always full and happy :))) mwaa

❤️ love :: @en-amours besides the url lol i love how jo and i can go deep into our conversations and talking with her always makes me feel this kind of depth and solace + this sentimental vibe where just a mere presence of her can totally make you feel at ease. jo always have a lot to say abt things but they're usually not the general knowledge that you'll get from her. her words and sentiments often carry a lot of emotions and meanings. she's so raw with her thoughts and i loooveee that so much. i know we still have a long way to go to build up a much tighter bond but i can already say these with ease cos jo, you are a gem and i'm always in awe and in comfort talking to you 💛

🍫 chocolate :: @jakeysim gill, my babyghorl, she reminds me of chocolate mainly because she has a lot of energy and emotions 一 like a chocolate 🙃 you get that feeling when you take a bite off a chocolate bar and you suddenly feel a rush of different sweetness at once? like it may not look like it has a lot to offer but when you indulge yourself in it, you get a whole package maam. you get what i mean? like she's more than what meets the eye. she's not the typical "what you see is what you get" cos she's a WHOLE lot more 😉

🍭 sweet :: @en-sun wifey <33 ohh nani 🥺 mi precious luvv, always so supportive and sweet and thoughtful ughh might have ants biting me soon cos she hella saccharine sweet my teeth cant even >< she never fails to brighten up my day even when she was still my adorable emoji anon 🥺 she's just ultimately friendly and genuine, man

🧸 cute :: @chuunie aaaaa yuriii my other unofficial child lmao very very supportive and energetic and ofc, i cant leave adorable out now, can i? this loving being pls i feel like yuri's pretty jumpy in person and i would just shower this little cutie with lotsa hugs right away. cuddles >>> & @vrsace-niki my babykins!! very endearing and genuine 🥺 literally feel like biting or pinching your cheeks everytime we talk oh god cmere childddd i wanna wrap you up like a burrito and hug you so tight with my legs around your burrito body 😭

✨ gorgeous :: @entypens ooohh angel, my my, dont get me wrong all of my mooties are exceptionally gorg she a beaut and a gem, ya girl be slayin' all day and i'll be like "damn, that's my girl right there" proud mom right here yall !! at this point i cant keep track of how many children i have on this hellsite JFBHS

🤪 fun :: @soyatenada bee !! this person right here maam. very enthusiastic when her interactive mode's on. she's very analytical and deep too! such a great listener and a person with heaps of genuine feedbacks and advices. very curious and exciting like maam, your energy bar pls take it slow imma have to catch up JFHHS

☀️ sun :: @angeljungwon haziebub! she just exudes warmth and comfort 😌 it feels so easy and relaxing talking to hazel, like you can approach her at any time of the day and scream at her about something that made your stomach do backflips ykwim babe 😉 and she would immediately ride in the vibe and get along with your silliness or whatever... until the vibe dies out cos my energy is very limited pls im a hag

🌙 moon :: @miffythoughts eyyy miffy~ i totally loveeee miffy's appreciation to the wonderful, little things in life. i get that a lot of people do cos i myself adore little things as much as yall can imagine but there's something with the way miffy portrays those details and emotions. she just gets that feeling and i am in awe of how intricate she goes into describing these beauties. she's very deep and beautiful, inside and out. she knows what she's doing and what she's talking about and just... w o w her mind ykno 🤯 i kinda wanna live there rent free even just for a day. lemme peek through those intricacies you mold into masterpieces hun !!

🌟 stars :: @serendipitysung andiii, ma lifesaver andi HAHA andi sure is a bright jewel. she seems timid sometimes and in other times, she's loud. but she's just right 😉 she doesn't say much but you'll always have this sense of security and safety cos you know she's just right there beside you, no words needed to let you know that. i enjoy her feedbacks and appreciation and support towards my writing endeavors and how she's always so nice it feels like she embraces you in warmth and comfort that you just wanna snurfle under her chin and stay there because dang, feels so homey might wanna camp in here along with the sweetest aroma from fragrant candles surrounding around <33

[hiddenwritingsintheworld]

Somebody Else-Jensen x Reader Part 2

[Sooo many of you requested a Part 2 to the one shot 10,000 Emerald Pools, so I fought myself trying to find the most person sequel. and I think I did just that! I hope you all love this!!  P.S Thank you all for being so patient with me, my mental health hasn’t been the greatest for quite a while and I’ve been going through alot of stuff. It’s really hard for me right now, in all aspects of life but I promise I’m going to try and fix everything! Thank you all for your love and support! means way more than you know!]

Somebody Else-The 1975 (LISTEN TO THE SONG HERE!)

10,000 Emerald Pools (You must read this one before reading ‘Somebody Else’) 

Donations

               Jensen wasn’t really sure where you two were headed after you left the hospital. He knew two things, number one he wanted to work things out and get back together. Number two he knew things would be different now that you were busy with your music. Which, he was really impressed and proud of, he just knew how busy the famous life could be. He hoped that you guys could be friends but from the moment he’d helped you into his car, you were silent; and he knew that wasn’t a good sign.

               You sat quietly next to Jay; he was insistent on being there to help you. You’d tore a small muscle in your back, nothing major, you’d be fine in a few weeks but Jay wasn’t having that. He said he would be your body guard/personal assistant, whatever it took for you to forgive him. Which, you already had but you knew in your heart that you couldn’t just admit it. He’d really hurt you when he ended things like he did, and all because he was famous? You could have cared less about that.

               You had started to see a future with him and he ruined that. It was going to take a lot more than just getting you some food and a book when you wanted to make up for that. But as you pulled up to your house, a few cars were parked outside. “shit….” You mumbled as you carefully undid your seat belt. “What’s going on?” Jay asked as he parked the car. “I completely forgot, I’m hosting a small get together for some major people in the record company today and I have to give a small performance.” You sighed closing your eyes. “Are you sure you’re up for that?” Jay asked you softly. You looked at him and nodded “I have to be, it’s my job.” You stated flatly and opened the door.

               Jay jumped out and made his way around the car, but you were already trying to pull yourself out when he got there. He carefully helped you up giving you a small lecture about waiting for help. But sitting on your couch for hours with a guitar on your lap wasn’t going to go along with the doctor’s orders, which consisted of ‘lots of bed rest and relaxation. Take the pain medication as needed with an off set of Tylenol.’

               You walked inside the house and smiled as some of your friends came over and greeted you. “Who’s the hot nurse?” your friend Ashley grinned after Jay had carefully set you on the couch, and left to get you some food and something to drink. You glared at her, “he’s my personal assistant. NOT nurse. And he’s off limits” you snapped.

               Ashley as well as a couple of close by people turned and looked at you with a concerned look. “Sorry, just in a lot of pain.” You said trying to lean back. “Whoa, easy, let me help you.” Jay came back with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, with a glass of sweet tea. God why did he have to know you so well. You sat back against some pillows and felt the tension leave your back.

               “Let’s hear this magical song, which I’ve heard rumors is about a certain young man who broke your heart,” David, one of the company’s top dogs said with a smart-ass smirk on his face. “Yep. He dumped me, and so for revenge I wrote this song about how I just can’t live without him. Almost died making the music video about it.” You laughed as they did but your laughter was fake. You hated this, you wanted out of it so badly. Music was a great way to express what you were feeling, and it did that for a lot of people, but it was obvious to you that these guys weren’t in this business for their feelings. They were in it to get their pockets fattened.

               You were handed your guitar and you slowly strummed on it, “So while I was in the hospital, I was thinking of another song, which it’s not finished, however I want to sing some of it for you all today. We’ve all heard our first hit, but I think this could be a second one.” You said softly as you began to play the guitar. No one objected thank god, and you began to sing softly.

‘So, I heard you found somebody else

And at first, I thought it was a lie

I took all my things that make sounds

The rest I can do without

 I don't want your body

But I hate to think about you with somebody else

Our love has gone cold

You're intertwining your soul with somebody else’

               Jay watched from the door frame across the room, he knew this too, was about him. Only this time, he was getting the message a lot louder and clearer. You were over him; you didn’t want him anymore. But you also didn’t like the idea of someone else having him. Which was nice in his mind, because maybe this meant your anger wrote this song. Maybe you were just angry that he’d started to date someone else. Or that he was on a date when you saw him again.

‘I'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone

And then leaving with somebody else

No, I don't want your body

But I'm picturing your body with somebody else’

               You slowed the guitar strings and looked at everyone. “That’s all I got so far, but I think it kind of flows nicely from 10,000 Emerald pools.” You said, but most of the big wigs started talking amongst themselves, after about an hour they began to leave, but not before telling you that they liked what they’d heard and they were expecting you back in the studio soon, regardless of your back injury. You all needed to talk about this album that was going to come out.

               You watched Jay clean up the house, your notepad and pen sat on your leg as you watched him. No doubt you knew what this album was about. It was going to be all about Jay, and the feelings you held for him. You began to write as you played some beats on your phone. You looked at him again to see him glancing at you. “You feeling okay? You look a little pale, you’re supposed to be resting while taking those pills.” He said coming over and helping you lay back on the pillows. “yeah, just thinking is all.” You said and covered up with a blanket as you yawned.

               You started to quietly sing again as Jay went into the kitchen and cleaned everything up. Tapping your pen on your notepad, you began to develop a nice rhythm to the song.

‘I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body; I don't want your body’

               Weeks passed and Jay never left your side, you’d often remind yourself you didn’t want him. But it was so hard, he’d work out while you did some therapy, he’d cook for you, clean up your place, he was like your right hand, always there, always willing and eager to help you. But you knew he just wanted to hear that you forgave him.

               One morning Jay woke up and heard music, he’d never heard it before. Crawling out of bed, he walked over to the guest bedroom window, that he slept with open and listened. You were sitting out on the back porch singing softly with your guitar.

‘Come on baby

This ain't the last time that I'll see your face

Come on baby

You said you'd find someone to take my place

 Oh, I just don't believe that you have got it in you cause

We are just gonna keep "doin' it" and everytime

I start to believe in anything you're saying

I'm reminded that I should be getting over it

 I don't want your body

But I hate to think about you with somebody else

Our love has gone cold

You're intertwining your soul with somebody else’

               Jay listened to the feeling and passion you put into this song, he had crushed you, truly, and you were angry that he was here. Which, he should try to smooth things over but what was the point? You were bound to reject him again and again. You literally wrote a song about driving him away. If you truly had wanted to be with him you would have tried to be.

               It may not have been the most perfect plan but Jay was going to do one last, final attempt to get you back. He sat down and began to write a letter to you as he listened to sing that morning. It was a long shot, but he was willing to do anything to get you back.  

‘I'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone

And then leaving with somebody else

No, I don't want your body

But I'm picturing your body with somebody else

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

 Get someone you love?

Get someone you need?

Fuck that, get money

I can't give you my soul, 'cause we're never alone

Get someone you love?

Get someone you need?

Fuck that, get money

I can't give you my soul, 'cause we're never alone

Get someone you love?

Get someone you need?

Fuck that, get money

I can't give you my soul, 'cause we're never alone

Get someone you love?

Get someone you need?

Fuck that, get money

I can't give you my soul, 'cause we're never alone

 I don't want your body

But I hate to think about you with somebody else

Our love has gone cold

You're intertwining your soul with somebody else

 I'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone

And then leaving with somebody else

No, I don't want your body

But I'm picturing your body with somebody else’

@adriellej​ @sgarrett49​ @smoothdogsgirl​ @mrssamfuckingwinchester​ @hobby27​ @traceyaudette​ @mogaruke​ @thewalkingdistancefrom​ @booger206​ @ellen-reincarnated1967​ @heimganger​ @moonlitskinwalker​ @teamfreewillimagines-blog​ @stoneygirl​ @monkeymcpoopoo​ @sandlee44​ @asgardianvamp21​ @frozenhuntress67​ @babypink224221​ @just-another-busy-fangirl​ @flamencodiva​ @for-the-love-of-the-fandom​ @jaylarkson​ @auriel187​ @jessica-marsh09​ @woodworthti666​ 

(P.S Let me know if you want to stay on the tag list or be added! Im creating a new one!! Thank you!!) 

[aferalracoon]

THE BLACK BULLS IN HIGHSCHOOL

Ok so I found myself thinking "what role would each black bull fit in a very cheesy-typical-american-teenagers-film environment?" and my mind ACTUALLY developed something.

So here it comes, my very first personal and self-made headcanon!

Enjoy!

YAMI: THE DAD- I MEAN, THE TEACHER

He is teaching PE (duh)

All students call me him "coach"

He is actually coaching one of the high schools' teams as well - something like basketball or baseball

It is not even the first team but he refused to coach the first teams and likes to focus on who is left behind because not as talented. Even if everyone consider his boys as loosers he would never give up on coaching them

Since he is the coach the team has actually improved - everyone is surpassing their limits and he is so proud of them

Would give emotional support to the kids that are not comfortable in PE class due to bullying, clumsiness or body immage issues

EVERY student would go to him when they have some kind of issue

He gets real about everything with his students: sex, birth control, sexuality, mental health...

But he would never judge them and would always offer the best support

He actually saved lives because of that

Students would fight for him when other teachers bullshit about his reputation as he doesn't get along with the rest of the staff

He is dad

ASTA: THE SPORT BOY

He is part of a bunch of different teams and clubs, and he rules in every single one of them

However he prioritise American football, he is the starting running back and the team's star

Would already have a bunch of college scholarships if it wasn't for his marks

Like he actually tries so hard but he just can't cope with studying and homeworks

He avoids basketball, he is short and insicure about it (he would be great at basketball too tho)

Very popular and all the girls have a crush on him

But he doesn't have a clue

Doesn't like hanging out with his team mates, most of them are "lads-lads" and bullies

He actually fights them a lot

Lowkey geeky, he loves hanging out with the geeks gang and nerd all they long with them when he doesn't have sports commitments

They would help him improve his scholastic performance because this boi really needs help

BONUS: Asta worships coach Yami like a god and Yami ATTENDS HIS GAMES TO SUPPORT HIM

NOELLE: THE RICH GIRL

Extremely popular due to her family reputation

She is part of the elite group in school, meaning the rich kids gang

She would act very cold and distant as the group's etiquette requires

She is actually extremely sad and bored - those guys are not her friends, she hangs out with them just because she is supposed to, so she feels like she doesn't have any friends at all.

The only person she trusts and vibes with in her group is Mimosa

Has the hugest crush on Asta

The two of them eventually become close and she starts to hang out with him and his friends

Would never confess her feelings tho

Very smart, her marks are top ranking and she is planning to apply to a very expensive and fancy college after grads

Extremely clumsy and insecure when it comes to sports and PE but since she befriended Asta she is getting better at it

Loves reading and is secretly part of the book club, which she considers as her self-care and happy place

CHARMY: THE MASCOTTE

Everyone at school loves her

She is always cheerful plus she is so tiny and cute nobody could even think about not liking her

Not the best marks but she gets along with all teachers very well

Always organising some sort of bake sell to collect foundings for the school

Eats the bullies

Would join Zora in his pranking sessions by time to time but she would always have her way while Zora is getting all the troubles

Started the cooking club at school - there are not a lot of members but they have a very good time

Always brings her own food for lunch - she hates canteen's food

MAGNA AND LUCK: THE TROUBLEMAKERS

Constantly in the detention room after school

Skipping classes is their favourite sport

Always together

Magna is kind of quieter than Luck and most of the time Luck is the one that is providing chaotic energies to the duo

Magna on the other side doesn't do anything to stop him - he is very chaotic himself, just way more self conscious

Magna is slightly better at school than Luck and he would pass him homeworks and notes

Teacher's worse nightmare

But when it comes to Yami they would do their freaking best to impress him

Their uniforms are always messy

They had a makeout session in Magna's room once - it felt good but now they decided to do not talk about it

Just a lot of homoerotic vibes

GAUCHE: THE MISTERY GUY

Always quiet

Doesn't speak to anyone

Kind of rude when you approach him

Only has one friend: Finral

Girls really like him due to his looks and his misterious persona - but he cannot be less bothered

Nobody knows when his birthday is

His marks are really good

Loves history class

Plenty of his little sister's photographs in the inside of his locker door

Has a part time afternoon job in some coffee shop

Only studies at night

One time Finral conviced him to go to a party and he still considers it as the most ridiculous experience he ever had in his life

FINRAL: THE PARTY BOY

Cute as hell

Super bubbly personality, always cheerful

He studies the bare minimum and survives by being extra nice to teachers in order to get higher marks

Somehow this technique fails when the teacher is male

Befriended Gauche (nobody knows how) but his bestfriend is Vanessa

Had sex with half of the school

Girls would cry in the bathroom for him

He is actually very insecure and scared of commitment but the only person he would talk about it with is Vanessa

He is the CEO of public relations at school and in charge of all the social events

Lying drunk on the grass in front of the school after a ball with Vanessa while looking at the sky and talking nosense is one of his best high-school memories

VANESSA: THE PARTY GIRL

She is older than anyone else as she had to skip a couple of school years due to her difficult past

Only student that lives by herself

If Finral is in charge of social events at school, she is the queen of throwing private parties and her place

Attended class in hungover or still drunk a lot of times

However she menages to get good marks and invests time in studying and doing homeworks

Would like to attend college but thinks she is too stupid for that

FINRAL WOULD FLIP EVERYTIME SHE DARES TO SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT HERSELF

Boy crushes on her a lot but she is into older men

She goes to Yami's office everytime she has a mental breakdown due to her past traumas, she knows he would help her a lot - Finral and Yami are the only people who ever saw her cry tho

Wears her uniform in a very sexy way - and teachers disapprove that

Younger girls always go to her for beauty and dating advices

Bonus: Finral and Vanessa are like brother and sister and never ever had any type of sexual interaction - but nobody believes that.

ZORA: THE PRANK GEEK

Extremely smart, loves sciences

But his reputation among teaching staff is completely ruined due to his constant pranks

Like this guy could prank the principal himself and don't even care about it

He is actually planning to

Best detention pall with Magna and Luck

His tie is always undone

All the bad girls absolutely love him

Apart from playing pranks he is a big fat geek - he loves video games and often spends the weekends with Asta and the other geeks playing PlayStation all night long

Attends Charmy's cooking club quite often

Would skip classes just for the hell of it

Never attended a party

GORDON AND NERO: THE GOTH DUO (ALSO GEEKS)

Bestfriends, everyone thinks they are dating but they just vibe

Extremely good marks, they rule is chemistry class

They always pair up for projects and there is no competition

Very rare to hear them talking unless they are talking to each other

Spend lots of time at the library just being quiet and studying at the same table

Also love hanging out in their rooms listening to music or going to the comics shop

They absolutely love comics

Part of the geeks gang

Nero would spend hours reassuring Gordon after some girl that doesn't deserve him broke his heart

Gordon tries to find Nero a boyfriend at all costs and she doesn't understand why

Never skipping one of Asta's game

GREY: THE SHY GEEK

Absolutely hates PE

She always cries in the changing room before every single class

Yami knows how to reassure her tho

Only comfortable around her group of friends

Very good marks, she would love to study drama after grads

Big teather nerd, she loves the drama club and she is actually very good at it - it is also the only place where her shyness would completely disappear

Also extremely good at RPGs (like D&D)

Loves to organise RPGs sessions at her place with her group of friends

One time at school a guy flirted with her - she ran away and didn't show up for 3 days

She secretly admires Charmy for being so outgoing and sociable

She is also part of other clubs at school like book club and crafting club - these activities really sooth her

Actually enjoys sitting by herself in class if no one of her friends are there

Finds Luck and Magna extremely fun

HENRY: THE FRAGILE GEEK

He has a permission to skip PE due to health conditions - Yami makes sure that he is always included somehow so he won't feel lonely while his classmates are running around

Really good marks but his attendance is not the best

Loves literature class and loves reading

He read "The Lord of The Ring" 40 times

Also loves cinema and takes part to the cinema club

His friends would hang out at his place so he doesn't have to go out too much

when they go out they always make sure he's fine, is hydrated and not getting too tired

Asta would teach him how to throw a football

Always sitting in the first row in class

Would not take any bullies and roast the hell out of them within seconds

Loves to help other students with their homeworks

[snake-snacc]

So I was again a little brainstorming and this came up? I really love those boys and I try to tell myself that they are perfect (especially Shirabu), but they aren't so... yes. Thats what I THINK would be their bad traits

HAIKYUU HEADCANONS 

——————————————————

TEAM: Shiratorizawa 

TOPIC: Bad / Toxic traits in a relationship 

——————————————————

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

His lack of emotion and reading the mood is something many people can't handle. And as his partner it is just frustrating. He won't really recognize if you are down or if something is bothering you. He would ask, for sure, but he wouldn't realise it until someone point it out or you yourself tell him.

There are many times when he tells you he doesn't have time for you now. And that would be okay, but he tells you that on 6 days the Week sometimes and doesn't understand why you are missing him, when you texting every second or third day.

TENDOU SATORI

You see, dealing with Tendou in general is a little hard. But when it comes to a relationship it's getting harder. He will often tease you about little things and mostly realise when he is going to far, but at some points he just won't. So there are times when he teases you until you are really mad or sad about it. But why are you crying? He just said, that you could eat a little less. 

There will be times when he is making jokes about himself in a down talking way and he doesn't recognize it himself, that it's really hurting him to see you laugh a little about what he went through, even if he was telling it as a joke to make you laugh. 

SEMI EITA

Semi really wants to show off at some point. He wants to show you that he is good enough for you, that you can be happy to have him. But there can be times where he is overtaking it. When he won't let you do something alone because he can do that for you, or when he does something riski to show you that he isn't afraid. But he is. He is really afraid of losing you or giving you only a second to think, that there could be someone better. His worst fear is to be exchanged from you, so he doesn't want that to happen. 

Sadly often enough he will even bring it up in a fight you two have and say stuff like "You won't find anyone better than me." Or "Are you searching for someone better?", because everytime he sees you smiling while talking with someone that he doesn't know, he will start to think you find a better person in that one.

SHIRABU KENJIROU 

He will be blunt to you. You knew that, that was the first thing you knew starting the relationship, but you underestimate him. He will clearly tell you to shut up, that you are annoying him, or that he doesn't want to see you. He won't take his words back or even apologise mostly. In fights it's pretty mainly that he throws insults at you, that he know hurt you very much. He will pick up your little insecuritys and call them out if these are things that he can't stand. 

Infront if his friends or the team he will not show that he really loves you. He doesn't want to get mocked for it or something so he doesn't show his affection in public, even would slap your hand away if you try to hold his. 

He is to strict with himself, that he wants to do all the stuff alone and at some point damages his body and mental health with it. If you point it out and tell him, that he doesn't look well or he should stop studying and eat some proper food, he will just tell you, that this is none of your business and you should look at yourself first before telling him what to do.

GOSHIKI TSUTOMU 

Goshiki really want to be that boyfriend that you can show proudly to your friends, so he will do anything to be exactly that. He will always ask how you're doing, what you are doing, where you went, if you need help, if you have time, if you need something, etc. But there is a limit. He will ask those things like 8 times a day and if you simply say, that there is nothing wrong or you don't need something he will immediately ask again and again if you are sure.

So clearly he wants your attention. He really wants it. So he will be really sad if you do something with your friends or anyone else that isn't him. You love him, so why aren't you in his arms right now?

If you tell him that you don't have time the day or the week and say something like "we have seen each other the whole last week and yesterday too", he will slowly start to think that you have another one or that he is doing something so terribly wrong that you don't want to see him anymore.

KAWANISHI TAICHI

Just lying in bed, phone in hand, you in his arms and some silent music in the background is totally okay for him as a date. He doesn't need and want all those affection and all the "I love you"s. If you text him one time a day or every second day it's okay, so why are you texting him every hour? You see each other at the school or after it if he has the time. So why do you want to call him to hear his voice? He know that there are people like you that need the attention and affection in a relationship, but he doesn't. So he will get easily annoyed with it. 

He will show you just as much love as he thinks you need. And that is seeing you at school, giving you a quick kiss before leaving and a message a week where he ask if everything is fine. If you text him your whole day and everything, he will see the message and think about reading it later, when he wants to know the whole story. So be ready to be at least 5h on read.

There will be no "I love you so much babe" stuff. If you are lucky and he agreed with himself to show you more affection (maybe because your complains about his "emotionless" behaviour annoyed him to much), you will get a "love you" once a month. He know he loves you, so why should he tell you that all the time?

REON OHIRA

He is a little afraid of your clumsiness and all that stuff. So you better stay where you are and he will do the stuff for you. Or bring you something. He isn't exactly "babying" you, he is just afraid you could hurt yourself or get in trouble. So telling you to stay where you are and do nothing until he is back, isn't wrong right? At some point he really treats you like a little kid.

At first he was not found about the idea to introduce you to his parents. What if you say something wrong? What if you embarrass yourself? It wasn't that he was ashamed of you, he was just worried.

When you complain about your sadness or you emotional chaos he will listen, and will try to help, but if you are keep on  arguing with him that he is wrong and you are a bad person/loser/nothing/etc. He won't fight it anymore. He will just say yes at some point and roll his eyes. 

YAMAGATA HAYATO

It isn't that he is a easy person and that he is very easy going with the relationship, but you think he is. He doesn't know what is bad about making other girls compliments or telling them, that they would be totally on his list. He is just being nice so what is your problem? He loves you, so he can dance with other girls at partys and stuff, right?

But you dancing or talking with another boy? No way. Yamagata would be directly at your side and tell the dude to fuck off because you are his girlfriend, even if the boy was just normally talking to you, so boys as friends? There is no chance. But if you tell a girl to fuck of that was clearly trying to flirt with him he will ask you what is wrong and why you are so sensitive. 

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◇ If YOU would like to have some Headcanons on something or something similar (maybe a little drabble nothing big) just send it and tell me (not in the comments). I really like to make others "happy" and it gives me motivation on writing.

[iyliss]

What does ‘destiny’ means for Saiou and Edo.

Honestly, trying to explain precisely and without missings what « destiny » means in season 2 is rather impossible. I will probably forget things, or maybe aspects will contradict themselves somedays but I don’t really care. There’s too much to tell, and right now I will try to focus on exactly one aspect. What do Saiou and Edo means when they talk about destiny. (Also I will use more or less precise quotes and rephrasing, but I can give the specific lines and episodes. I just don’t like how pictures looks on posts like this, and Im really writing this for myself before anyone else). So. What do I mean by all that. The concept of destiny is often used by both Edo and Saiou but it appears that they don’t really put the same exact meaning behind it. Though when they talk to each other they mostly use it in similar way, some other iterations don’t exactly match. For exemple, Edo initially can’t believe Saiou’s predictions may change or turn out wrong, while Saiou treats it rather calmly. Edo also many times iterates that destiny is an immovable object, that humans can’t pretend alter, while Saiou talks a lot about changing it. So. What does it mean for the both of them and why does it hold different meaning ? And please do know that that is just a massive piece text.

First, let’s consider Edo’s meaning. As said, Edo begin by sincerely thinking that destiny is absolutely impossible to change. It’s something that dictate people’s life, but that they can’t escape nor control beyond having some knowledge of it. In his first duel against Judai, he specify that it is something determined at birth, and already is written as such. In a way, it’s a rather god-like concept : all powerful and beyond humans’ reach. I think this all ties in Edo’s inner desire of some kind of absolute justice. In the earliest episodes, Edo sincerely think there’s a difference between exceptionnal people, who were given abilities and an incredible fate to accomplish, and everyone else who can’t ever reach the firsts’ level. It’s a justice in the sense that everyone will receive in measure of their greatness eventually, which is only given and not chosen. It’s also a justice in the sense of good and evil. Edo clearly doesnt believe in any justice system, chasing criminals himself. As such, destiny is the consequences of being an inherently bad person, that any good person (that Edo surely take himself for) has the right to punish. This divine justice destiny influence as such most of Edo’s early personnality. The way he disrespects others, and the way he grows to view Saiou. One of the thing that made him unable to notice the quite morally wrong things Saiou was doing, is because he still believes that there’s a strict limit between good, innocent people, and those who commits crimes. And Saiou can’t possibly be on the second case. It is further strenghtend by the absoluteness of his concept of destiny, potentially projecting that, destiny being always right, Saiou who incarnates it for him must be as well.

As such, Edo’s challenge against destiny was majorly based on accepting that it does not exist, first by breaking the order it had built. It went by having to face that Saiou may not always be right, but also that he may not be as special as he thought. And that’s the part where Judai is possibly able to save Saiou. If it’s Judai, instead of him, then it means for Edo that he is not really exceptional. It means destiny is wrong, and it means rebuilding the fundation of his ego. That’s why Edo stops talking about destiny rather brutally. The moment the rules break, he can’t do much but let go of them. That’s why, when the Light and Saiou still tells him about destiny, he just ignores it. Between the moment he realized his destiny had lost meaning and then, he ended up viewing himself and Saiou as much more whole and human (and also realized believing in destiny hadn’t help him as much as Saiou in himself had).

As for Saiou’s destiny The way he talks about it make it seem a lot less rigid. At the end his goal is to change it, by meeting Edo, then by observing Judai. He accepts the changes he sees and, as seen in his duel against Manjoume, choice is allowed. His is closer to the uncontrollable consequences of things. It’s kind of the meaning of that duel. Around the end, Saiou asks Manjoume to shuffle his deck before he draws the card on top, which will mean Manjoume either win or lose.  Right there, Manjoume both has and has no choice. He can choose when to stop the shuffling but, in the end, not knowing what card is on top, he doesnt really control anything. Choice matters (it is what decides what card will be on top), but having the right card is not really under control. In all that, Saiou is in a position of knowing what card will be drawn, but not how. He knows the outcome, but not the execution. And this situation of knowing the outcome but having little control over the process is how he uses destiny. That’s his « destiny of destruction » : he knows that he will eventually go through this but is rather powerless when it comes to preventing it. Edo is going to save him ? Sure but he doesnt know why or how, the best he can do is make sure he’s in his life. And so on. The predictions can be wrong, the result can change, but there’s always this aspect of not having control on whats to come. It is close to determinism.

When Saiou challenges his own destiny, it’s by managing to not care about it. The main issue that can arise from a certain kind of determism is the thought that people are actually powerless, and everything is just consequences of causes that can’t be control. The only way to get back control , in  Saiou’s situation, is by knowing the causes. That’s pretty much what he does when he tries to find out who will save him, and just about everytime he reads the future. He’s trying to find the causes of the consequences he already knows. That leads him to never really take actions. That’s one of the meaning behind his saying that he is imprisonned by destiny. Knowing it makes it impossible for him to actually think he’s changing anything. This is one main difference between Edo and Saiou’s concept of destiny. An opposition rather meaningful in season 2, between believing and knowing. Edo believed that some people were inherently better than others. It wasnt really based on any truth, and his path was to let go of that belief. Saiou knows the outcoms, it’s not something that can be undone, causality is based on logic and, at the end, it’s pretty much impossible to stop knowing that causes and consequences are a thing. His development is about not caring about it, or not focusing on it. The last thing Edo says about destiny is that he doesnt believe in it. The last thing Saiou has related to that is refusing to listen to the Light talking about serving destiny. So, no longer focusing on what’s to come, including no longer being able to tell the future.

And if you’re wondering, the meaning Saiou gives to destiny in season 4 is a bit different so… I wont really cover it here.

But, there’s something those two meanings have in common. They are the concentration of what both of them used as children to deal with their situation, and importantly filling the absence of adults in their life, and that they projected on a singular concept.

Edo was found lost and alone after his father’s death. He coped mostly by projecting the guidance he lacked onto his cards (leading to being so protective of them), and the idea of destiny brought by Saiou. I’m comparing the two because, while the D Heroes are quite obviously a reminder of his father, his « destiny » can be too as it is heavily based on heroic narratives. At the end of the day, all his talk about people’s fate being written in advance, the difference between the exceptionnal people, the unimportant one, and the evil ones, it’s like a story. Behind all this, there’s still a little boy dealing with loss by projecting himself into a story (inspired by the heroes from his father), where the hero is brave and strong and better than anyone else despise his tragic past, where there are unimportant npcs here to show how great the hero is, and a Big Bad to save someone he loves from. Thinking everything is written makes sense since it’s how stories always goes. At the beginning, Edo is very passionate about destiny, but also about heroes and how those cards are for him alone. His development goes by both accepting that Judai may save Saiou, that he isnt as important as he believed he was, and that heroes can be just fun as well. And it all comes from what he needed as a child : reassurance, justice (that adults couldn’t provide by not finding his father’s murderer), and promise that he had a future and a happy ending. Destiny was a continuation of his father’s legacy, and a way for him to keep building himself despite the lack of adults in his life.

As for Saiou, he pretty much says he used destiny as a survival tool when he was a kid. Especially to stay sane. The first effect destiny had on him was to keep some kind of rationality. The way he uses his power, and talks about destiny, is quite distant. Being able to understand both what was going on for him, and what would happen (his own prediction) has hardly controllable causalities, allowed him to make sense of it. On one side, as someone with more information, distancing himself surely was one of his own coping mechanism. On the other, thinking that there are so many factors leading to something can reduce guilt, especially when it comes to his « destiny of destruction ». Following destiny meant he wasnt in total control, so it wasnt completely his fault. Even if the whole guilt reducing part may not have worked, it did made him strongly feel like he had no real control on his life. That’s how destiny played for him the role an adult would have. Taking responsibility for his life, his action, and organise it. Saiou talks so often about being guided by destiny, as a way to separate himself from decision and actions he shouldn’t have had to take as a child. Interestingly, Saiou is conscious of using destiny like that since he is a child. When he refers to when he met Edo, he does think of it as his own intention, but view them as wrong. Unlike Edo, who’s transition out of destiny was rather brutal, Saiou don’t have a moment of realization. He may have known for a long time that, even if destiny like that isn’t so good to focus on, he won’t really stop. Escaping destiny in a way is not so much about changing what is to come, but letting go of the concept itself.

So I think Im running out of things to say if I want to keep it focus. I hope it makes some sense and interest, it’s hard constantly reminding myself of how the characters are and what they say so I can put down something coherent. I am pretty sure I won’t agree with some stuff in a bunch of week but I don’t really care, at least now some more thoughts are out in the wild.