#I also may or may not be making the neighbors too-
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the joke amongst the skittles friend group is that they're all like coke and mentos. separately, they're fine and easy to handle, but you put any of them together and you may die. allow me to explain myself
i'm... gonna put a cut here this is long af
barty and evan- barty's just a little out of it by himself, same as evan, but you put these two together and something relatively human is getting dissected and fucking killed. or they're kinky fucking somewhere they Should Not Be. they might also be in the white house.
evan and dorcas- new clothing brand out in 0.0003 seconds. also your mom is dead, sorry.
evan and dora- these two are in the walls of jkr burning shit. oh, your next door neighbor when you were ten who's been dead for six years was homophobic? she better fucking run through hell
dora and dorcas- you may not think they're crazy but there is Satanic Ritual Shit going on in the forbidden forrest and it's because they're high. no one will ever believe you :D
dorcas and regulus- you think you're safe with them. you're not. they're stealing your valuables and fucking your parents as we speak
dora and barty- she's possessed and he's high. need i say more.
evan and regulus- put these two in a room with anyone else and that person will exit crying. they will verbally rip anyone to shreds if they're in bad enough moods. a n y o n e. no one is safe.
regulus and barty- these two. oh man these two. you may think that regulus mellows barty out, no no no. if you leave these two in a room alone for too long someone will die in minnesota and they will have an alibi because they were in england, but they did it.
dorcas and barty- they will bring about the End Of All Days at some point through the experimental potions they try. they accidentally created the most dangerous potion in existence attempting to make regulus testosterone. also they're probably in the walls of parliament or backstage at a blackpink concert, wherever they are they're not doing it legally!
regulus and dora- they are genuinely worse than james and sirius. gryffindor tower blew up last time they were together, but the were never actually caught because reg was braiding dora's hair and no one could imagine the sweet duo doing anything like that
#marauders#marauders era#dead gay wizards#fuck jkr#regulus black#evan rosier#pandora rosier#barty crouch junior#barty crouch jr#rosekiller#rosier twins#pandora lovegood#pandora lestrange#bcj#bcjr#the skittles#slytherin skittles#the slytherin skittles#the pantheon#the emeralds#rab#r.a.b#trans regulus black#regulus arcturus black
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Working on a certain neighborhood đ¶âšâš
TW: Scopophobia and slight Selaphobia!!
(eyes and an ounce of flashing lights!)
Opening door and windows! (I recommend not actually going in there)
Made the eyes so that they kinda just follow you đ
Don't worry home, I'll make the others soon!
I also made whatever the heck this is:
#welcome home fanart#welcome home#welcome home home#eddie dear#welcome home eddie#PLEASE BEAR WITH ME-#All I have is paper tape and glue and that's it đ#So it's not perfect-#Howdy's place is going to kill me#I also may or may not be making the neighbors too-#I love this and hate this at the same time đđđđâš#I also have no experience with crafting whatsoever-#I actually got the moving eye idea from furry suits!#I think they're neat đ#ANYWHO#I'll fill you in when I finish the next house!!#Toodles! âšâšđ
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doodles and some lore. I'm tired.
#Jay does this thing on second dates where he tests the other person#he wants to make sure they'd like all of him. every part of him that may throw others off or realize he's insane#Matt and Jay were friends during high school. dated in college and broke up just before finding out Jay was pregnant#they decided to co-parent Mona and just view one another as friends#Mona really likes Don and Tk. loves Peter. though dislikes Lucy quite a bit because of how much she hears Jay complain about her with Matt#Mona is very close with Jay despite living with Matt and only coming over to Jay during the holidays/some weekends#Jay moved into the complex about a year prior to meeting Peter. he's had 5 roommates since moving in#Lucy has been the worst compared to the rest but is the only one Jay tolerates (since she's young and reminds him of himself. pretransition#Jay and Don hated each other in the beginning. only really bonded over talking shit about a neighbor#and Jay saying âanyway I gotta finish watching the game.â Don saying how he wanted to too but his tv is fucked so they watch together#Tk does have feelings for Jay but Jay just can't take the hint. he simply just thinks he's making jokes and is very kind#Jay really cares about Lucy. he often checks up on her when she's out and buys her dinner if he didn't make anything for them#and she ofc tries to make his life easier by cleaning the apartment making him coffee in the mornings etc etc#also Jay and Don sometimes just talk about marriage. how both of theirs didn't work out (I headcanon that for Don)#how it'd go - Don: I just wish I showed her how much I cared... Jay: I chased mine down with a knife. didn't kill her though. I promise.#Jay also calls Don's kid (the cop) Don Jr. he doesn't mind it that much. it's mainly cause Jay never remembers his name#my art#yb peter#Yb don#Void#Jay#Yb tk#Yb lucy#none of them die btw. Peter kills some guy who treated Jay poorly#the entirety of Jay and Peter's relationship before the abduction takes place over June#I say so cause it was a bit alarming to Tk. Don and Matt how fast Jay was rushing into the relationship and such#anyway uhh idk what else to say
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I canât draw for shit but I am locking in the concept of a spidersona from an Atlantis-esque New York that is flooded due to climate change and rising sea levels thatâs based on Desis and Diving bell spiders
#I say locking in AS A JOKE multiple people can have the same idea Ive already seen multiple diving bell spider people and theyâre all lovely#A real oh boy two cakes moment yknow#Anyway tag rant time#[blank] Parker a high school student living in the lower levels of a flooded New York#Where buildings were air sealed and protected but in poorer neighborhoods not very well#Seals will crack and leak and itâs not particularly uncommon to find out your neighbor drowned in his sleep because his apartment flooded#So they develop a web fluid that can seal the cracks and can harden underwater and works better than anything currently on the market#Cheap to make too#Word gets out and theyâre invited to their universe equivalent of oscorp or alchemax or whatever thatâs above the water in some skyscraper#And big corporation does as big corps do#wants to buy the rights to the web fluid and sell it back to people who need it to survive at a horribly inflated price#Parker doesnât like that obvs and on the way out gets bitten by a radioactive spider#And Spider-Man plot progresses from there#Iâm thinking big corp tries to steal the web recipe (either through break-in/espionage or maybe some hired muscle intimidation)#and either way the uncle Ben stand-in dies in the crossfire#Powers include the usual super strength climbing walls etc#Also can stand on the surface of water and hold breath a really long time#And can make airtight webbing with their web fluid that can make air pockets#Their superhero suit is a repurposed diving suit#âŠ.it only now occurs to me this may be in poor taste due to recent events#Sorry I got underwater shit in the brain#I wonder why#Anyway#theyre part of the spider society but only technically#Theyâre kinda mid compared to other spider folks so they Donât really come into play much unless itâs an aquatic mission#Miguel raises the alarm for miles and theyre like âyeah? Ok well if he jumps into any pools lemme knowâ#Also like. Water and electricity powers do not mix so only spiders without that ability can come help them in their universe#And not all web fluids are waterproof#And most normal webslinging is kinda hard with the drag underwaterâŠ#They may or may not be kinda lonely
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Man, One Day from One Piece started playing while I was showering and I decided to let it play and. God I can still sing it. It's been so long since I last listened to it. Used to listen to it nearly every day of 2020 and then fully stopped as soon as the year changed. Fuck man.
#carime rambles#i know it's been a relatively short time but. considering HOW MUCH i listened to it... it feels much longer. also because quarantine.#that song will forever be linked to me 1. selling my childhood home and 2. the house at the beach where i lived in total isolation#i know the 2nd sounds sad but trust me. it was the most peaceful Id been in years. and i mean total isolation minus my family. no neighbors#and it also reminds me of 3. my slow but steady progress to being more open about my emotions+in general. quarantine really helped me there#as weird as it may sound if it weren't for it i wouldn't be as open and outward as i am rn#that beach house became my home and the prospect of selling it wrecks me.#thank god my parents are just as unwilling to let it go and my siblings make really good use of it.#wrote a few more tags but decided it was way too much oversharing so uh. deleted them
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Holding myself back from flying off the handle at a friend bc they said wearing white to a wedding would be a very me thing to do, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN-
#Its just a dress up game itâs just a dress up game itâs just a#Am I not the most autistically etiquette obsessed person you know#I may make some stupid fashion choices#Like the harrier Dubois swag outfit#BUT I ALWAYS CONSULT LIKE 9 PEOPLE BEFORE GOING OUT#I be consulting mommy dearest I be consulting my teenage sisters I be consulting the neighbors I be consulting the cows-#The only etiquette I disgrace is opening the door for someone else#Like if a man opens the door for me he better hope Iâm too distracted to fight him to the death to open the door for him#Oh also The Men sit on the outside of the booth table of restaurants. WHOS BEING ACTIVELY EMASCULATED I GOT DIGESTIVE ISSUES#I CAN SIT ON THE OUTSIDE AND FIGHT OFF ATTACKERS IF I WANT! I CARRY SO MANY KNIVES!#WHAT ABOUT ME BEING EMASCULATED. WHâŠâŠahem.#this got out of hand#cw personal#maybe?#idk man Iâm flying into a rage#vent#etiquette#Fashion#alt fashion#Ramblinâ again#fashion disaster
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your neighbor sukuna who lives in one of the apartments upstairs may be a rough and dangerous man, but heâs funny and nice to you, so you become friends anyway. you even develop a little crush on him, and when he calls you little pet names like sweetheart and doll, you start to think he might like you too. one night you decide to go out for drinks, and as he drinks more he lets out more about his past and you learn he is a little more dangerous than you thought. he talks about how he broke into peopleâs houses at night all the time to steal their things and when he finally did get caught and locked up, he had probably broke into over 200 peopleâs houses by then.
âthatâs crazy, but you wouldnât get that lucky with me thoughâ
he sets his beer down, raising his eyebrow at you in question.
âwhat do you mean?â
âi mean that im a very light sleeper, always have been. and thereâs no way you couldnât break into my apartment without me knowing it.â
he picks his beer back up and takes a swig before looking back at you with a smirk.
âyou sure about that?â
you confidentially smirk back at him.
âoh absolutely. i get woken up if the wind blows a little too hard against the window. i even woke up that one time i had a mouse in my apartment and i could hear it scurrying across the floor. i would definitely hear you open my door and walk around.â
sukuna taps his fingers against the bar counter with his head in his hands and his eyes still on you, thinking.
âhow about we make a bet.â
âa bet? on what?â
âif i can get into your locked apartment and into your bedroom without waking you up, i win. if i do, you win.â
âand what do i get when i win?â
sukuna chuckles at that, almost like a villainâs laugh.
âi wouldnât worry too much about that.â
you roll your eyes at him.
âoh please, you sound way to confident in your impossible chance at winning.â
he laughs at you again.
âi am. thereâs a reason i was able to break in so many peopleâs houses while they were still in there without getting caught. itâs kind of my specialty.â
you take another sip of your drink and lean back.
âyour specialty, huh? and you still havenât mentioned what we get if we win.â
âwhat do you want?â
his tone caught you off guard for a second, getting deeper and more serious without you expecting it.
âu-um, i donât know. you can pick.â
he smiles at you again, a devious smile this time as he leans in closer to you.
âif i win, i get to do whatever i want to you. if you win, you get to do whatever you want to me.â
time stops for a minute and you donât realize that youâre just staring at him until after several seconds.
âwhat do you m-mean by that?â
he leans back to hold his beer and his playful demeanor is back.
âwell according to you, you wonât have to worry about that, right?â
a couple of days went by and you were still on edge. you mentally slept with your eyes open and even kept your bedroom door cracked, just in case you really couldnât hear him come in. even though you knew it was just a bet and a silly little game, you couldnât stop your heart from pounding against your chest. maybe because you still didnât really know what he said meant. and there was also the eerie feeling that you were essentially waiting for him to break into your apartment, like a real robber. like the robber he used to be. and even though you knew he wasnât dangerous to you and wouldnât hurt you, you were still admittedly a little scared. you truly didnât know what to expect.
it had been a couple of weeks now and you were sure sukuna was fucking with you. whenever you saw him in passing, he was his normal playful and flirty self, and mentioning nothing of the bet. you were starting to think he was kidding, just making that up to scare you and mess with you. or you also thought he could have just forgotten, since he was drinking a little and couldnât have forgotten all about it.
but little did you know that you were playing right into his hands. he was waiting on you to lose your edge, to slowly get comfortable enough again to slip into deep and dream-filled sleeps. thatâs why you didnât expect it, why you didnât expect to lose.
when you woke up one night, you felt your heart fall out of your body and your eyes almost jump from their sockets. there he was, in your apartment, in your bedroom, on your bed, leaning over you on his hands and knees. when he saw that you were awake and too stunned to speak, he smirked and leaned in closer to you until his face was just inches from yours.
âguess i win, sweetheart.â
#dangerous sukuna#i might make dangerous sukuna a thing#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna ryomen#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk sukuna#sukuna fic#sukuna fluff#sukuna smut#sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryoumen#ryomen sukuna x reader#jjk fic#jjk fluff#jjk smut
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I'M SO STUPID IN LOVE!
Â·Ë àŒ ê± summary lovey-dovey things they'd do for you!
Â·Ë àŒ ê± characters isagi yoichi , bachira meguru , itoshi rin , nagi seishiro , mikage reo , chigiri hyoma , hiori yo , shidou ryusei , itoshi sae , michael kaiser , alexis ness .
Â·Ë àŒ ê± warning lowercase intended
Â·Ë àŒ ê± song inspo stupid in love - max ( ft. huh yunjin of lsrfm )
Â·Ë àŒ ê± isagi yoichi
you know how isagiâs brain is basically soccer, soccer, soccer? well, this man rewires his ENTIRE system for you. suddenly, every time he scores a goal, he dedicates it to you. like, mid-celebration heâs shouting your name in front of thousands of people. embarrassing? a lil. cute? definitely.
heâs also the type to leave you notes everywhere. youâll open your locker, and boom: "i hope your day is as perfect as your smile. also, pls drink water. - yoichi đ©”"
or youâll find random sticky notes around the house with stuff like: "you're cuter than my dog. and thatâs saying a lot." ( i hc he's a dog person, fight me đ« )
"yoichi, did you seriously compare me to your dog again?"
"is that bad?? youâre both my top priorities!"
Â·Ë àŒ ê± bachira meguru
bachira is a walking ball of chaos, and it only gets worse when heâs in love. he makes you weird handmade craftsâlike a necklace with your initials carved into a random rock he found because âthe vibes were immaculate.â
heâs also the king of grand gestures. once, he showed up outside your window in the middle of the night blasting your favorite song from a boombox. and no, he didnât think it throughâhe got yelled at by your neighbors, but he swears it was worth it.
"meguru, why is there a rock with my name on it?"
"because i love you. duh."
"âŠyou couldnât just buy a necklace??"
"whereâs the FUN in that?? D:< "
Â·Ë àŒ ê± itoshi rin
soft tsundere energy incoming. rin doesnât say much, but when heâs in love, he SHOWS it. like, heâll memorize your coffee order, your favorite book, and the exact way you like your hoodie sleeves rolled up. you swear heâs psychic, but heâs just that attentive.
he also sends you texts at random times:
"donât forget your umbrella. itâs going to rain."
"i noticed you like this song. added it to my playlist."
youâre 99% sure his search history is âhow to take care of someone without being obvious.â
"rin, did you... did you learn how to make my favorite food?"
"shut up and eat it."
"youâre so sweet itâs disgusting."
"i said shut up."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± nagi seishiro
nagiâs love language? pure, lazy dedication. he may not seem like the romantic type, but trust meâhe will move mountains for you... as long as it doesnât require getting up too much.
once, he spent HOURS figuring out how to build you a playlist of all your favorite songs, complete with a cover photo of you two. he even labeled it: "for my player 2 đčïž"
"sei, this playlist is amazing!"
"mm, yeah, it was exhausting. now can we nap?"
"you literally just sat there and clicked buttons."
"exactly. so tiring.."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± mikage reo
reo goes all out for youâno budget, no limits, no second thoughts. one time, you mentioned how pretty cherry blossoms are, and the next thing you know, heâs flying you to a festival in japan. casually might i add.
but the sweetest part? he remembers the little things. your favorite snack? stocked in his pantry. your favorite flower? delivered to your doorstep every friday. he spoils you rotten but somehow makes it feel like the most natural thing in the world.
"reo, this is too muchâ"
"no, itâs not. nothingâs too much for you."
"youâre literally insane."
"only for you, babe."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± chigiri hyoma
chigiri is the definition of đromantic aestheticđ. he writes you poetry and leaves it in random places, like your bag or your coat pocket. sometimes, you donât even notice until hours later.
he also takes you on dreamy datesâpicnics in scenic fields, long bike rides at sunset, and slow dances in your living room when itâs raining outside. everything he does feels like itâs straight out of a romance movie.
"hyoma, did you just quote a shakespeare sonnet to me?"
"maybe."
"oh my god, youâre so dramatic."
"and yet youâre still here."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± hiori yo
hiori is the sweetest, softest boy in love. he keeps a journal where he writes down all the little things you do that make him happy. once, you caught him scribbling, and he turned BRIGHT red.
heâs also the king of quiet acts of service. your phoneâs always fully charged, your favorite snacks magically appear in your bag, and you never have to ask for help because heâs already two steps ahead.
"yo, were you writing about me again?"
"no... maybe. okay, yes."
"youâre adorable."
"please donât look."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± shidou ryusei
oh boy. shidou is CHAOTIC in love. this man would probably fight a wild animal to impress you. heâs all about making you laugh, even if it means doing the dumbest stunts imaginable.
one time, he literally climbed a tree to get you a flower. it wasnât even a nice flower. but hey, itâs the thought that counts.
"ryu, youâre bleeding. what did you do??"
"got you this flower. cool, huh?"
"you FELL OUT OF A TREE FOR THIS??"
"worth it."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± itoshi sae
sae is the definition of quiet but deadly romantic. he doesnât show his feelings often, but when he does? damn. like, heâll casually fly in from another country just to spend the weekend with you because âitâs no big deal.â
he also sends you fancy gifts out of nowhere. but if you call him out, heâll play it cool like itâs nothing.
"sae, did you just buy me an entire designer collection?"
"itâs just clothes."
"just clothes?? this cost more than my rent!"
"and you look better than rent."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± michael kaiser
kaiser loves showing off, especially when it comes to you. heâll buy out a billboard just to plaster your picture on it with the words "the love of my life đ©”."
but heâs also surprisingly sweet. like, heâll carry your bag, fix your hair when itâs windy, or randomly pull you into a dance in the middle of the street just because he can.
"michael, did you seriously put my face on a billboard??"
"obviously. everyone needs to know youâre mine."
"youâre ridiculous."
"ridiculously in love with you, yes."
Â·Ë àŒ ê± alexis ness
ness is a total softie. he writes you little love letters and leaves them in your mailbox, signed with his initials like heâs a secret admirer. you obviously know itâs him, but you let him think heâs being sneaky.
heâs also BIG on cuddles. whenever he sees you, itâs like he canât function until he gets a hug.
"ness, you know i know itâs you, right?"
"âŠyouâre supposed to pretend you donât!"
"why?"
"because itâs romantic!"
© txrully
do not copy/translate/plagiarize/repost my works in any way. ( i will find you đ¶âđ«ïž )
likes + reblogs appreciated âčđč
#isagi x reader#isagi yoichi#bachira x reader#bachira meguru#rin itoshi x reader#itoshi rin x reader#rin itoshi#seishiro nagi x reader#nagi x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#reo x reader#reo mikage x reader#chigiri x reader#hyoma chigiri#hiori x reader#hiori yo#shidou x reader#shidou ryusei#itoshi sae#sae x reader#michael kaiser#kaiser x reader#alexis ness#ness x reader#đ©·âžâž ÊÊÊᎠáŽÊáŽáŽ
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texas sweet
summary: joel is your friendly neighborhood dad of the year, so why is his driveway empty on father's day? better yet, why do you feel the need to make up for everyone elses absence?
tags: 18+, smut, handjob, desc of joel mastubrating, a "massage", neighbor!joel x f!reader, massages, general cheesiness, soft!joel, pathetic!joel, almost(?) sub!joel, reader gets blueballed (sorry), biting, joel whimpering, joel being a proud girl dad, no-outbreak, ellie and sarah exist, tommy is mentioned(!!), joel is a southern gentleman, mention of reader having parents, no desc of reader but she can fit between joel and the couch, dilf!joel (yum)
-> part. ii here!
a/n: my first joel fic ever... i would like to thank every person who has written no-outbreak!joel or pre-outbreak!joel. i freaked it.
texas sweet masterlist and my masterlist
(4.9k, not beta read.)
Moving to Texas was not the plan, or even the âblessingâ your mother claimed it would be. Being the one who took over your grandparents home after they moved to a seniors facility? Fantastic! Amazing, even. Leaving your job, friends, and boyfriend, back home? Horrible. Heart wrenching and annoying.Â
Austin, for the most part, was lonely. Long distance didnât end up working between you and your boyfriend, your friends just got busier with their jobs, and it wasnât like your parents could just drive 14 hours to see you every weekend. Co-workers were nice, but honestly who really wants to hang out with people you already spend 40 hours a week with? Maybe you were jaded, or picky, which was what your mother also claimed, or maybe your whole life was uprooted for what felt like no reason.
What you werenât picky about, was the view from your bedroom window. Youâre not a peeping tom, or a perv, but it isnât your fault that your dilf-y next door neighbor is so easy on the eyes.
No, moving to Austin was not a blessing, but Joel Miller was.
Joel was the neighborhood guy. Need an oil change? Joel. Need your fence fixed? Joel. Block party? Joelâs yard. Itâs like he doesnât know how to say no to anybody, that southern politeness deeper than the drawl that lies in his voice. When you had first moved here he had helped you move your couch through the door, all smiles and polite nods. He barely introduced himself before he was asking if you needed any help, and he had called you âyoung lady,â which made you giggle. Such a giving man, but of course he was. A single father to two daughters? âNoâ wasn't in his vocabulary.
Sometimes, you think if your dad was as good a father as Joel Miller was, maybe you wouldnât be fiending after him with such ferocity. Watching him with his two girls, Sarah and Ellie, was something that tugged your heartstrings no matter what. Sarah wasnât around a lot anymore, apparently she went away to a fancy college. You had helped her pack all her stuff into Joelâs truck, but quickly went inside when you saw him getting misty eyed, you didn't want to embarrass the poor guy. Ellie is younger than Sarah and still lives at home. Honestly, you didnât know much about her apart from the fact that she was adopted and that sheâs in high school. Sheâs always happy to chat, but sheâs also always going somewhere, which leaves Joel lonely sometimes.Â
Joel seems better suited for loneliness than you are though. His brother Tommy comes around pretty often, though they seem fairly opposite. Tommy truly is sweet, has always chatted with you during block parties (even if it may be for nefarious reasons when heâs had too many drinks,) but he looks like⊠a fuckboy. Without fail, every time he rolls up to Joelâs house, heâs blasting some shitty new country music and wearing Pit Viper sunglasses as he carefully parks his spotless truck. Despite their differences though, they get along just as well. Your summer evenings are often interrupted by the sound of their laughs and the crisp sound of the two cracking open some cold ones.Â
So why is it that when Fatherâs day rolls around, Joelâs driveway is empty?
You arenât watching on purpose, you just happen to glance over that way a lot. The only action you see from his house is Ellie leaving for her friend's house sometime after noon, like usual on a Sunday. No signs of Sarah or Tommy. Part of you figured that maybe Sarah would make the lengthy drive down from her school, or maybe that Tommy would show up at some point, but nobody does.Â
âNot creepy,â you assure yourself as you go upstairs to peer through your bedroom window to see if anyone is there. You could totally look through the kitchen window that directly faces his backyard, but you fear the day heâs looking right back at you.Â
Looking outside, you see nothing. Joelâs grey-blue truck sits unmoved in the driveway, his plants are watered though so you guess he came outside at some point. The thought makes you feel a bit sad, the image of Joel and his soft eyes watering the plants, whistling to himself and trying to tell himself it doesnât matter that nobody came. He probably really doesnât care at all, a lot of men arenât very sentimental or emotional about days like this, but you care.
Heâs a good man, a good father, and a good neighbor. Seeing him be underappreciated on what is basically his day is ticking you off for some stupid reason. When 3pm rolls around you decide that you have to do something for Joel, it feels wrong not to.Â
Which is how you end up in line for the register at Home Depot. You sat in the parking lot for 10 minutes racking your brain, trying to think of things that guys like, but came up with nothing. Joel is a contractor, so heâll probably find some use out of a 50 dollar Home Depot gift card, but it still feels too impersonal. Joel literally fixed your toilet when a date you took home broke the handle off the tank mid-vomit. Heâs too nice to just hand a stupid gift card with âHappy Fatherâs dayâ scrawled across the mini paper envelope. He deserves something thoughtful, something gentler than a gift card for (probably) his job.Â
âŠWhich is how you end up waiting in line for the register at the supermarket. You have a bouquet of flowers in your hand, with a Home Depot gift card shoved in your jacket pocket. It feels utterly ridiculous to give Joel Miller flowers, to pick out which colours you think heâd like and get the florist to wrap them up neatly with a bow, but you have a good reason. At some point in the past week you had seen a post about how a lot of men never receive flowers. It resurfaced in your head as you picked your brain again, making you wonder if Joel had ever received flowers. You know that he was married once, but that was when Sarah was little, itâd probably been 10 or even 15 years since he had any gestures like that made for him.
Not that this was for romance reasons. It was for fatherâs-appreciation-day reasons. Of course.
Maybe you shouldnât be so invested in your neighbors emotions and life, but itâs too late now. You carefully pack away the flowers in the back seat of your car, snuggling the gift card into the ribbon that holds the flowers together.Â
â
And if you thought that standing in line at Home Depot, or at the supermarket was bad, itâs so much worse trying to work up the courage to knock on Joelâs front door. You canât figure out how to hold this bouquet of flowers behind your back without dropping them, so you just awkwardly knock on his door with one hand, flowers in the other. At least the gift card is managing to stay in place where you tucked it, but you wish you told the florist not to write his name in cursive.
Your repeating thoughts of âIs this weird? Am I weird?â are interrupted when he opens the door.
Joel looks⊠normal. He doesnât look sad like you thought he might, if anything he looks more confused at you being there. His brown hair is tousled slightly and heâs wearing pajama pants, even though he smells fresh. Joelâs eyes meet yours and he tilts his head quietly, as if waiting for you to go on, but what do you even say? Oh shit thatâs rightâ
âHappy fatherâs day,â your voice comes out shyly. You shove the flowers at him a little abruptly and he blinks in surprise, accepting them. Itâs awkward for a second, the way his eyebrows shoot up as he notices the cursive lettering of his name written on the envelope.
âTheseâre for me, darlinâ?â He asks curiously, still looking over the flowers.
A stammering of âumâ and âyeahâ leave your mouth pretty quickly and he smiles. Youâre pretty sure he says thank you, but you just kind of stare at him awkwardly. A beat passes between the two of you as he admires the gift. âYou uhâ You donât think of me as your dad, do you?â Joel asks. Oh fuck. You hadnât thought about the fact that maybe that was what he would take away from this. All of your thoughts had been consumed by worries that heâd think you were trying to hit on him, but here he was thinking that you thought of him as a father figure. Which you didnât. Your dad is fine, no need to replace him, at least not at this point.Â
âNo, no. Oh my godâ Sorry,â You choke out, half laughing. Itâs a quiet moment on the porch for a second, just the two of you standing there. Maybe you should explain your thought process.
âItâs just that youâre a dad and likeâ not to sound like a weirdo freak but nobodyâs been at your house all day and it made me sad for you. Not that I pity you but,â your voice trails off as you fear youâve made this worse. Joel seems a bit surprised at this, mouth opening slightly but then transitioning to a soft smile.
âAnd what if I told you that I wanted everyone tâleave me alone today?â He asks you slyly. And oh god, that is so much worse than him mistaking this gesture for flirting or pity. You never would have thought that maybe the guy who does everything for everyone probably just wants to be left the hell alone for a gift. Your heart drops in your chest, taking all the blood in your face with it. Embarrassment floods you with a force you didnât realize possible, stuttered apologies leaving your lips as fast as you can. Joel shakes his head, laughing quietly as you sputter âsorryâ repeatedly, like a broken sprinkler.
âIâm jokinâ, sweetheart. I appreciate this,â he says. The crows' feet by his eyes shouldnât be as charming as they are, but combined with that rumbling laugh and smile⊠he could get away with anything. He plucks the Home Depot gift card from the ribbon and huffs a laugh, like heâs impressed.
Well thatâs⊠something? It made him smile right? Maybe feeling bad for Joel was better than feeling stupid in front of him. You step back, towards the stairs of his porch, but he shakes his head. âYou were really this worried?â He asks, admiring the flowers. That makes your heart bloom in your chest, seeing how much he really liked this. Joel didnât seem much like a flower guy, but you saw the way he kept his yard neat, with tulips in the spring and his lawn trimmed squarely. Shyly, you nod in response to his question. It feels silly to worry for him like this, you donât know if he considers you a friend the way he is in your head.
âSâawful sweet,â he tells you. Something about his presence is so big, a balance of hospitality and intimidation all at once. Maybe itâs his big stature, broad shoulders and thick arms, a body built for work. Or his voice, the strong timbre of it, humbled in southern twang. Joel is a force of warmth, a heat that canât be contained. His heart shines through his golden skin, forcing whoever he looks at to have a spotlight. Thatâs where the intimidation lies, in how he makes you feel like thereâs a halo over your head, all his attention right there.Â
Heâs so hot you donât even want him to look at you.
But there he is anyways, smiling as he admires the gift again, dorkily leaning in to dramatically huff the flowers. His mouth is moving but you're deafened by the sensation of a blush on your face. You thought it was just a silly little crush, because who wouldnât find Joel attractive. Heâs handsome, hard working, and just an all around traditional man. But this attraction⊠It's like your crush on him has given you tinnitus. His lips are moving and you arenât registering the words. Wait shit, heâs speakingâ
âDarlinâ?â Joel calls. He looks at you, head tilted, and still fucking smiling. The way his eyes glimmer, the crows feet that squeeze them into a smile⊠Why is it so hard to hear him?
âI asked if you wanted to come in,â he repeats.Â
â
Youâve never been inside Joelâs house, but youâd never thought about it either. Being in it, now, it all makes sense. Photos of his daughters are framed everywhere, their achievements plastered on the walls in shines of silver and gold. Itâs hard not to imagine Joel hunched over his kitchen counter, tediously cutting pictures out to place them in frames. He was only an idea before, an idea of a man, and now he has become one wordlessly. All it took was stepping inside his house, smelling him everywhere. Life dances in the jackets that are tossed over dining room chairs, the toolbelt dumped by the shoe rack at the door. The picture of Joel you held in your mind begins to come alive, the movements in the details of his life stealing your breath. He is more than a good man, he is a great one.
And now, you have to strike up a conversation with him.
Joel grunts as he sits down on the couch beside you, placing two glasses of water down. He places his glass in front of the can of beer sitting on a coaster, distorting the label to nothing but warped blue and red. Is he hiding that he was drinking? Why is that cute?Â
A pause hushes both of you as Joel gets comfortable, sitting down. Heâs paused a show, but it just looks like it was whatever movie was playing on the local TV channel.Â
âYou must be so proud of them,â you say, eyes glazing over the pictures of Sarah and Ellie. You can tell exactly which photos were taken with a camera and which were taken with his phone. One picture of Ellie, maybe when she was 13 or 14, is from her soccer tournament. Sheâs smiling, holding up a ribbon for MVP, and Joelâs thumb is in the bottom corner. Itâs strange to realize that Joel has basically been a father twice over, but also admirable.Â
He talks for a little while, rambling about Sarah and her time up at college, and also how Ellie has been doing better in school this year. You always had a feeling Ellie was a bit feistier than Sarah was, but to hear how proud Joel is of her anyways makes your heart flutter. His love for them was so unconditional, so why werenât they here today? You ask him, a half smile crossing his lips as he hears your question.
âSarah called me âround lunchtime, one of them video calls. Had lunch with my girl and got to catch up with her. Sheâs so damn busy, yâknow that? Always studying and,â he catches his breath, realizing heâs blabbing again. A reddish tone creeps up his neck in embarrassment.
âPoint is, she called. Was nice of her, I miss her lots,â He finishes quietly.
Your eyebrow raises. He didnât mention Ellie. Joel huffs.
âIâm 99% sure sheâs over at Dinaâs making me a gift, but itâs fine that she forgot. Iâve been on her ass about homework, fairâs fair.â
He looks cute when heâs begrudging, one side of his mouth sliding to the side so part of his cheek puffs over it. You nod, making a comment in response. The conversation is so smooth you forget what youâre saying as soon as youâre laughing.Â
This is easier than you thought it would be. Joelâs always been friendly, obviously, but you just assumed he would be more closed off than this. Even if itâs just rambling about his daughters, or Tommy, or the jobs heâs been managing and how annoying his clients are, itâs something more. Something more than the passing glances and small conversation youâve had before.
You talk a bit about your own life, how tough the move to Texas was, how lonely it can be. Joel doesnât seem as receptive to this, but thereâs an understanding in his eyes that you can feel. Heâs a tough clam to slide your knife into, and you doubt youâll feel his tongue today. The eager blabber he has for his family and career doesnât extend to himself, and it seems youâve hit a wall with him. Or maybe youâve hit too close to home. âSorry,â you say, feeling a little weird.Â
This whole day has felt like youâre pulling against a lead Joel wasnât even holding in the first place, like youâre always doing too much. But just like the rest of the day, he isnât holding the rope around your neck. Heâs surging forward with reassurances blooming out of his mouth, Texas sweet to the bone.Â
He shakes his head, telling you that itâs fine, he gets it. A joke about being a single father, a smile directed at you, consoling. Vaporub for your congested anxieties.
âIâm sorry darlin,â Joel starts, and fuck is he sending you home? Is that your cue to leave? You did too much, he was just being nice.
â-- I didnât even offer you water when you came in. Dâyou need somethinâ to drink?â He asks.
God, doesnât he get tired of being this nice? Your neighbors warned you that he was a grump when you first moved here, dirty liars.Â
âOh, sure, uh. Water would be good, thanks,â you reply.
Youâre only half paying attention to the grunt he lets out when he gets up the first time, your eyes busying themselves with the way his cotton tee stretches across the muscled planes of his back. But, after he hands you the glass of water and groans when he sinks back into the couch, you notice.Â
You down the glass like youâre parched, but really your mouth just needs to be full right now. The sound of his groans are bouncing in your ear canals as your neck flushes red with each gulp of water. If he notices, he doesnât say anything.
âBad back?â You ask after you catch your breath.Â
He hums in response, talking about how it comes with the job he has. âAll that lifting in my early yearsâŠâ as if heâs a thousand years old. Joel mentions that heâs been to the chiropractor a few times, thanks to Sarahâs begging and pleading.
âI donât know, I think itâs gimmicky. They get you on the table and the guy feelinâ you up acts like heâs Christ himself,â Joel says, rolling his eyes.Â
The idea of Joel, shirtless and face down, grumbling as some guy works his hands over his skin. The idea of Joel groaning in relief as someone else works those knots out, God you wish you were a chiropractor, you wish you could put your hands all over him.
Greed hardens over your mind like a shell, and the words tumble out of your mouth before you can stop them.
âI couldâ I could help, maybe. My dad used to have a pretty bad back and I kinda figured out how to work knots out.â
Joelâs eyes widen, looking over to you with mild interest. For the first time today, around Joel, you donât feel like youâve overstepped. In fact he looks interested in this offer. A beat passes between the two of you, hesitation caught in his throat it seems.
Itâs probably super fucked up in his head, his younger neighbor coming over and offering to rub him down. But your mind is still greedy, coated in thoughts of his skin under your palms, and that southern rumble thatâs given you dilf earworms.
He looks like heâs about to say no when you speak again.
âYou donât even have to lay down, or take your shirt off. Could just lift it up,â you offer.Â
Joel still looks like heâs going to say no, the left side of his mouth raising to make up some reason. You canât let him, not when youâve been this ballsy. Walking out of here now would make this infinitely more awkward.
âItâs your day, Joel,â you supply him with a reason to say yes. The reason might be silly, might be a last minute add-on to his fatherâs day, but who cares.
Apparently not Joel, since he pulls his shirt up to his shoulders, the fabric scrunching around his broad frame.
â
You feel a little stupid, slotted behind Joel on the couch. The two of you are basically shoved up against one another, Joel wriggling to give you access to his lower back. He hasnât said anything yet, no reassurance that this backrub is any good. You think youâre doing well, you feel the knots loosening. It might be better this way, him not making noise. The groan you heard earlier was more than enough to push you into a frenzy.
Your hands work further down, where his waist begins to pull in. Looking closer you can see where the softness of his tummy is, a fatherly badge of honor. Continuing your movements, you gently press your thumbs into the flesh there, and earn yourself Joelâs first noise.
Not a grunt, groan, complaint, or cuss. A whimper.
Your voice clashes with his, both of you talking over each other accidentally.
âAre you okayââ you ask as his voice flounders again, a âDarlin--â leaving him out of his own volition.
Pulling your hands away you begin to pull his shirt back down his back, mortified. How could you claim you were good at this and then hurt his back more? Joelâs been through enough today.
âPlease donât stop,â Joelâs voice grabs your brain again, forcing your focus.
Heâs sliding his shirt up again, just by rolling his shoulders as he hunches over, waiting for you to continue. His face is in his hands, and his ears are pink. Itâs the first time heâs asked you for anything tonight, you canât refuse him.Â
Placing your hands back where they were, you begin to massage again. It seems like his lower back is the main problem, with the way heâs grunting into his palms. As your hands work away the aches he begins to swear to himself.Â
âFuck,â he grunts as your thumbs dig deep, soothing a pain he hasnât felt eased in years.Â
This is good. Pride spreads in your chest, knowing he feels better. Your hands work away, and you get laser focused on untangling these massive knots in his back. Eventually you break your focus, switching to softer rubs and small scratches up and down his back.
Tearing your eyes away from his skin, you realize the throw pillow that was beside you earlier is gone. The yellow corner of the cushion peeks at you from where you saw Joelâs belly earlier, over his lap. A thick forearm is crushing it into himself there, the veins in his neck pulsing.Â
Flames lick up your face, onto the tips of your ears and down your neck, heating your spine. Is he aroused right now? âJoel?â You ask quietly.Â
He shakes his head, voice tight.
âIâm sorry, I donât know whatâs wrong with me. Justâ it just feels nice,â he admits.
Your hands pause. Okay, so heâs admitted heâs hard. What do you do now? Keep rubbing his back and blueball the poor guy? On Father's day? That seems mean, and awkward. Everything about this is awkward though, so it couldnât really get worse.
âI could⊠I could help it feel better,â you offer meekly.
Youâre not scared of a dick. You arenât. Your voice is quiet because it seems like he is horribly ashamed of this, probably feeling guilty.
Joel rubs a hand over his face.
âYou donât have to, you can just go,â he says, but his voice betrays him. Need is sewn in his tone, a desperation.
Part of you wonders how long itâs been since someone touched him like this as you reach around, palming the front of his jeans. The hiss he lets out tells you itâs been awhile. How wrong that is, an attractive man like Joel being forced to get his own rocks off.
Getting the button and fly of his jeans down is difficult when you canât see, even worse when your brain is making up images of Joel masturbating. Heâs so shy when heâs being touched, does he bite his sheets? Bite his other fist in the shower? Poor boy, he deserves this.Â
His hips lift off the couch to help you shove his jeans and briefs down. Joelâs bare ass slides against you and he cringes. âIs it okay if you donât look?â He asks.Â
You hate that he seems so insecure, but youâre not going to push him. Nodding into his skin, you press your face to his back, resting your cheek near the blade of his shoulder. Heâs heavy in your palm, warm skin with veins your fingers can trace over.
Telling him that heâs big feels redundant, youâre sure he knows that about himself. Neither of you seem very sure about what youâre doing, the shuddering breaths from his chest matching your hesitant grasp around his cock.Â
âAre you okay?â You ask again.
Joel nods into his hand, asking you to please touch him.Â
Admittedly, itâs a dry hand job, but Joel doesnât seem to mind. The flick of your wrist is fluid, even if your arm is cramping from being wrapped around him. Joel lets out these little noises, grunts and whines. His hand is covering his eyes while the other one rests lightly on your forearm, like he wants to know that youâre still there.
Need is exuding from him, making his desperation take over his need to really give a shit about how submissive he might be appearing. He shudders particularly hard as you squeeze on the upstroke, voice choking.
âShitâ shit, please,â he gasps, âplease can I spit in your hand?âÂ
Itâs a little surprising, but again, you canât refuse him. You say âyeahâ into his skin, closing your eyes as you feel him spit into your hand. Itâs filthy, his saliva on you as he guides your hand to jerk him off. Joel uses your palm to slick the head of his dick, teasing himself on your skin.
Itâs the first time youâve seen him be selfish all day. Part of you wants to call him a good boy, but part of you also knows this might not be normal for Joel. Hell, this isnât normal for you either.Â
Instead, you ask him if itâs good. A rasped âyes,â emanates from him between a low groan and a curse. Your head lifts from his back as he begins to shudder, his orgasm creeping closer. Listening to him is so good, youâre a mess between your legs, where your core nudges his ass.
Without a thought, you sink your teeth into the meat between his shoulder and his neck. Not enough pressure to bruise or hurt, just to let him know youâre there. There was no intention to push him over the edge, but your little bite does. A guttural groan is forced out of him as he comes into your hand, stringing sticky between your fingers.Â
âFuckâ fuck Iâm sorry, oh my god,â he pants, shivering.Â
Your head is shaking again, reassuring him that it was okay, that heâs okay.Â
âItâll wash off,â you joke, feeling the stick of him on you.Â
â
Joel does help you wash it off, once heâs done redressing. Heâs clingy though, arms around your waist and chin hooked over your shoulder as you wash your hands in his kitchen sink. Heâs definitely sleepy, eyes blinking slowly when you peek at him while you dry your hands.
You step close to him, your damp hands meeting his dry ones. The awkward spirit of the evening has been killed off, his shyness melted away.
âUsually Iâd offer to return the favor but⊠I have to pick up Ellie from her friendâs house now. Iâm really sorry, darlinâ,â he admits.
Shaking your head, you push away the negative feeling that surfaces. How are you supposed to go back to being neighbors after that? But also, what did you really expect?
Joel leads you to the door, legs a bit shakey. A smug feeling joins the negative ones in your chest at that, but itâs not enough.Â
âI really do apologize,â Joel says again, âbut this just gives me an opportunity to see you again. If youâd like, obviously. I think I owe ya dinner.âÂ
And there he is, not holding your lead but reassuring your heart. He wants to see you again.
Your eyes meet his in the dim light of the hallway, catching those sweet eyes in your own. He looks so hopeful, so apologetic too.
âIâd like that, but you donât owe me anything. Itâs Fatherâs day,â you point out.Â
Joel rolls his eyes. This Fatherâs day excuse is a little overused between the two of you now, but itâs still cute to him since youâre the one saying it. He opens the door for you, slipping his own boots on and grabbing his keys.
âFine,â Joel says, âbut when Pretty Neighbor day rolls around, you let me know.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#pedro pascal#hbo!joel#neighbor!joel#tlou fanfiction#dilf!joel#reader insert#joel miller x reader smut#joel miller x you#joel miller smut
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tumblr if it was ghosts
@gwensy look at my ghost dashboard
đïžcunty-phantom follow
ough my downstairs neighbors are soooo annoying "can you stop rattling your chains at 3am" this and "some people actually still need to sleep" that. first of all. when you get to my state of decomposition youll understand. second of all. how else am i supposed to haunt this attic, bitch? by being nice and polite?
đ»coo0ochie-haunter follow
some of you (not naming names) don't know how good you have it. oooo the straight up castle youre haunting doesn't have enough leaks to drip water through creeply when it rains? well my fucking graveyard got bulldozed and turned into a shitty gasstation. so maybe be more grateful next time
#vague #rant
đ°lonelylady follow
i just wish the couple renovating my castle to turn it into an air bnb hadn't closed up all the leaks in the roof :/
#i really liked the sounds the rain made when it dripped through #i AM exited for the new company though :3
đČslimy-spectre follow
can we honestly destigmatise ectoplasm? its a normal part of being a ghost, especially for those of us with psychic powers and im so sick of nobody talking about it because they think its "gross" or "too slimy".
đ»coo0ochie-haunter follow
just say you dont practice personal hauntgiene and stop posting about your disgusting habits on hauntblr smh
đČslimy-spectre follow
someone clearly watched too much ghostbusters
#also thats literally not how it works AT ALL
đghoulishous follow
boring victorian dresses are OUT, old bedsheets are IN.
#i know the whole "ghosts wear bedsheets" thing is a huge misconception by humans #but they did kinda pop off with it #may i also say #they make me feel extremely gender
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Overtime
Summary: Sometimes, working overtime isnât all that bad.
Pairings: Loki x Female Reader
Warnings: Smut, 18+ minors DNI, sex, cunnilingus, teasing, light bondage, office romance.
Series: Overtime (I don't have a masterlist for this, but if you enjoy these idiots, check out Daylight, a sort of sequel).
A/N: This was largely written prior to season 2 and posted right before episode 4, so itâs not entirely canon compliant and the parts that are may be compliant by accident.
Also, @give-me-a-moose and I were on a similar wavelength about Loki angrily reading romance novels and I would strongly recommend checking out her fic The Imagine Nation if you too are enthralled by this idea.
You donât think that Mobius intended to keep Lokiâs desk behind yours.
âItâs temporary,â he tells you apologetically. âHe just needs somewhere to go for now, until I figure out what to do with him.â
âYouâre talking about him like heâs a stray cat that you found,â you say.
âYou wonât even know heâs there, I promise.â
âYouâre still doing it.â
Mobius sighs and puts on his most sincere, earnest expressionâthe one that he always uses when heâs about to ask you for a stupidly massive favor.
And itâs only because you almost never, ever see this look from him that you back down.
âOkay, fine,â you say. âBut heâd better be on his best behavior.â
Mobius puts his palms together and tips them toward you. âThank you. You will not regret this, I promise.â
You sigh and shake your head. âJust remember this next time youâre budgeting for raises.â
But thenâin a move that you certainly donât expectâLoki ends up sticking around. And, in the subtle way that the stray youâve been feeding slowly turns into your cat, Lokiâs temporary desk becomes his permanent desk. And strangely enough, Mobiusâ assurances turn out to be more correct than not: Loki does a lot of fieldwork and is often away; when he is at his desk, it tends to be because he is working on more complicated missions, the ones that require poring over mountains of files looking for patterns and trying to untangle the slippery mess of time itself.
Your work is decidedly less glamorous than Lokiâsâalmost no fieldwork, lots of files. Endless files. Some days you feel as though you must have seen every file in the TVAâs extensive library and then youâre immediately proven wrong by another wing of filing cabinets that you swear wasnât even there before.
Although he is generally well-behaved as your desk neighbor, Lokiâs presence has a way of distracting you. Even if you didnât know who he was, your gaze would still naturally drift his way, lingering on those regal cheekbones, that ink black hair, that cunning smirk. The way that the fabric of his dress pants clings to his thighs certainly doesnât help, to say nothing of how his forearms look with his shirtsleeves rolled up. He can make your heart start to race with no more than a casual glance in your direction and god help you if he gives you one of those devastating smiles. Luckily, you donât think he takes that much notice of you. You have the sort of pleasantly dull exchanges of coworkers who donât really know each other and he is almost painfully polite to you. Itâs a strong departure from the way he interacts with othersâwith others, he is bold, charming, sarcastic, talkative, a far cry from the more subdued, almost courtly tone he strikes with you. Itâs a difference that is so stark that you canât help but attribute it to some sort of negative feeling on his end.
âHowâs it going with Loki?â Mobius asks you during a one-on-one meeting a couple of months after Lokiâs temporary desk becomes his permanent desk. âHeâs behaving himself, right?â
âItâs been fine,â you say, âthough truthfully, I donât think he likes me all that much.â
âWhat? Of course he likes you,â Mobius says. âWhy wouldnât he like you? Youâre lovely.â
You shrug. âI dunno, heâs just different with me than he is with everyone else. LikeâŠoverly polite. Itâs like he thinks Iâm going to send him to the principalâs office or something.â
âLet me get this straight,â says Mobius. âFirst you were worried that he wouldnât behave himself and now youâre worried that heâs too well-behaved?â
Privately, you realize he has a point. Outwardly, though, youâre not going to admit it. The sardonic tilt of Mobiusâ mouth suggests that he knows this.
âNo, I justâŠI donât think he likes me all that much,â you say. âAnd heâs entitled to that. People donât like each other all the time, itâs not a big deal.â
This is also a little bit of a lieâyou do wish he liked you. Loki is so magnetic itâs hard not to want his attention. And with the matter of your silly little crush, wellâŠthat doesnât help either.
Mobius sighs. âI think youâre overthinking this. He likes you, sometimes it just takes him a little time to warm up. Heâs a bit of a prickly guy.â
You bite down the urge to point out that youâve seen him warm to other people almost immediately. This conversation has already gone on longer than you want and you are edging dangerously close to having to admit that you care so much because you have a big stupid crush on him, which is obviously unacceptable.
âWell, the point is that itâs fine,â you say quickly, trying to project an aura of cool confidence. âI donât have any complaints, he seems like heâs settling in, so letâs move on. Did you have any feedback on my recent report?â
The furrow between Mobiusâ eyebrows deepens just slightly, the only indication that he doesnât fully believe you. But for whatever reason, he decides to let it go and follows your change in topic without further comment.
This is one of the reasons you like Mobius as much as you do: he always seems to know the right moment to push and the right moment to bend.
Youâre not sure if your relationship with Loki would have changed had it not been for the problem of Charles Berlitz.
The joke around the office is that after Mobius convinced Loki to work for the TVA, he needed something new to obsess over and Charles Berlitz was the next best option. Itâs hard to say exactly who Berlitz is, as he has a tendency of showing up, wellâŠeverywhere. He is quite literally in every timeline, at least as far as anyone can tell. Sometimes he is an author, penning serious, scholarly essays on outlandish theories like the Bermuda Triangle and the Philadelphia Experiment. He seems to have a fondness for all manner of schemesâhe was responsible for introducing both homeopathy and multi-level marketing to no fewer than sixty different timelines. His ability to peddle bullshit naturally led him to politicsâpick any rebellion, coup, or campaign on any given timeline and thereâs a good chance youâll also find Charles Berlitz.
Scammers and con artists are not atypical in your line of work, but what makes Charles Berlitz an enduring mystery is that he has never been found. You can have reputable documentary evidence that Berlitz was present at a certain time and location, but if you show up to investigate, he is never there. There have been some glimpses over the yearsâa shadowy face in the back of a crowd, the hem of a cloak disappearing behind a cornerâbut nothing concrete or substantive.
âOur ghost in the timeline,â Mobius had said in one of his more poetic moments at an all staff meeting, his voice overly hushed and dramatic. You had seen Loki roll his eyes and you had to fake a coughing fit to hide your laugh.
Time moves differently at the TVA, so itâs hard to say how long Mobius has been working on this case when he makes a breakthrough, but itâs not terribly long after your conversation about Loki. A campaign button had been found in an apartment that Berlitz rented for two years in the French Quarter. That particular campaign button could only have existed in one specific timeline and its distribution was limited. You arenât entirely clear on all of the details, but Mobius seems to have a plan.
And unfortunately, that plan involves you giving up most of your weekend to work.
Itâs near quitting time on what passes for a Friday at the TVA. Loki has been in today and you can hear him starting to pack up. Technically, heâs got twenty minutes of work left, but youâre not about to tell him that.
You doodle absently on your notepad. Technically, youâve also got twenty minutes of work left, but realistically: nothing is happening.
âOh, great, youâre both still here.â
In general, this phrase has never meant good news for you and when you look up, you see Mobius with a sizable armful of files.
Also not a great sign.
Mobius plunks the stack of files directly on your desk. âThereâs been a development with Berlitz. I need you both to review these now.â
âItâs Friday,â says Loki, affronted. âSurely it can wait until Monday.â
âNo can do. I need this done by Sunday at the latest,â says Mobius. âThis is an all hands on deck situation.â
Loki glances pointedly at the office around you, which has already started emptying out for the weekend.
âAll hands on deck, but most hands are already in the field,â Mobius concedes. âWhich is why I need the two of youââ He points to you. âYou because youâre goodââ He gestures to Loki. âAnd you because youâve got desk duty.â
âI beg your pardonââ begins Loki.
âHeâs grounded,â Mobius says to you in an exaggerated stage whisper.
This is not surprising to you: you had heard a rumor last week about an incident that had occurred on a mission to the inauguration of Richard Nixon and you suspect that these two events are likely connected.
You look at the pile of paperwork on your desk. You could probably get through it on your own in a couple of hours, but if Lokiâs helping, maybe you still have a shot at having Saturday to yourself. You bite back a sigh. âWhat do you need me to find?â
âAnything that mentions anyone from the Lucchese crime family or Nero Variant N2815,â says Mobius. âIâll go get the rest.â
Your heart sinks. Farewell, Saturday. âThereâs more?â you say.
âItâll be triple overtime, I already got it approved!â he calls over his shoulder
You sigh and glance at Loki who is scowling at the pile of files as though theyâd wronged him personally.
Thereâs a long moment of silence before you speak. âIs there any truth to the rumor Iâve been hearing about the Nixon inauguration?â you ask.
âIf it involved a hot air balloon, then yes,â he says rather tonelessly.
âWell.â You pause as you stare at the pile of papers. âAt least it was worth it.â
That at least earns you a hint of a smile.
*
Several hours later, your stomach is growling and youâve developed a rather impressive crick in your neck.
You lean back in your chair, stretching your neck to the side and rubbing the knot that is pulsing in your upper trapezius. Office work has done nothing positive for your posture in general, but tonightâs work has you hunched over more than usual and your neck is aching.
You and Loki have made good progress, but your pile of finished and sorted files is scarcely comparable to the full cart that Mobius had brought in. Back when the evening was new and you werenât quite so tired, youâd been optimistic about possibly having half a Saturday free from work; that hope has slipped away the longer the evening has dragged on. Now youâre hoping that youâll still have a bit of Sunday to yourself and even that feels unlikely.
Your stomach growls again. You should probably eat somethingâyouâd worked through your regular dinner hour in a fit of misplaced optimism. The cafeteria is closed this time of night, but thereâs a vending machine not far from your office that has shitty coffee and mostly edible sandwiches.
You stand and stretch, stifling a yawn as you turn around. âIâm gonna grab a coffee and some dinner,â you say. âDo you want anything?â
Loki looks up at you from the file in front of him, blinking somewhat dazedly and running a hand through his messy curls. âIâd like to stretch my legs a bit, if you donât mind the company.â
You honestly didnât expect him to want to join you. Itâs a pleasant surprise, certainly, but also a little nerve wracking in the way that interacting with Loki always is. Heâs so handsome and aloof and youâre not quite sure how to talk to him without acting like a total fool.
But youâre also not about to say no, either.
âOf course,â you say, âI donât mind at all.â
The TVA is unusually quiet at this time of nightâthe steady hum of fluorescent lights and the murmur of distant voices is all that accompanies the tap of your shoes on the linoleum. It only heightens the jittery, nervous feeling you get from Lokiâlike your stomach is filled with drunk, lightning struck butterflies.
âAre you finding much?â asks Loki as you enter the hallway together.
You shrug. âA bit. Mostly on the Nero variant. Iâm not having as much luck with the Luccheses.â
âIâve got all of their property transfers, I think,â he says. âRenato Lucchese never met a vineyard he didnât like.â
âOr racehorses, from what I understand,â you say. âI think thatâs how he lost most of his money.â
You arrive at the vending machines. Loki looks at the vending machines and then back at you, a somewhat puzzled and troubled expression on his face.
âThis is what you meant when you said you were going to get coffee and dinner?â he says.
You shrug. âYeah, whatâs wrong with this?â
He points at the coffee machine. âMobius calls that machine Satanâs coffeemaker, does he not?â
âYes, but I know how to trick it into giving me something thatâs almost palatable,â you say.
Loki gives you a rather dry look. âSomething thatâs almost palatable?â
âI mean, Iâm just trying to manage your expectations. Itâs still pretty shitty coffee, it just tastes less burned.â
He looks at you for a long moment before tilting his head toward the hallway. âCome on, letâs go.â
Itâs your turn to look skeptical. âWhat are we doing?â
âWeâre going out for dinner.â
*
He takes you to a twenty-four hour diner called Frankâs thatâs maybe a five minute walk from the TVA. Itâs one of those places with yellowing Formica tables and big booths covered in red faux leather patched with the occasional square of duct tape. It smells like coffee and grease with a faint odor of cigarette smoke despite the prominent no smoking signs.
âI wouldnât have thought this kind of place was your style,â you say as you sit down in a booth next to the window.
âIâve expanded my horizons,â he says, sliding into the seat across from you.
An older woman with greying blonde hair approaches your booth. She wears a nametag reading âConnieâ in big capital letters, a sticker of a pink cat stuck on the space next to her name.
âHow yâall doinâ tonight?â she says as she hands you each a laminated menu. She looks at Loki. âYou want your usual?â
âPlease,â he says.
âYou got it.â She turns to you. âHow âbout you, hon, can I get ya started with something to drink?â
âCoffee would be great.â
âAll right, Iâll be right back with your drinks.â
You raise your eyebrows at Loki as she walks away. âYou eat at diners and you have a usual order. My expectations are being completely upended.â
He returns your pleasantly amused expression. âAnd you have vending machine coffee for dinner. Itâs a revealing night.â
âI mean, I donât actively seek it out,â you say. âItâs a convenient option that I exercise only when I have no other choice.â
âNo other choice?â A sly smile curls at his lips. âDo you not have the entire array of space and time at your fingertips?â
âWell, first of all, we arenât supposed to use TemPads for personal errands without a supervisorâs approval.â
âTechnically.â
âNo, actually. Itâs in the personnel manual. Like verbatim.â
He raises an eyebrow. âYou would put yourself through the egregious physical suffering of vending machine coffee simply to appease the capricious whims of our cruel overseer Miss Minutes?â
You bite back a laugh. âYou know sheâs not actually our boss, right?â
âI canât discount that possibility. She wields a concerning amount of power within the organization.â
Connie is back with your drinksâcoffee for you and tea for Loki. âSunday Special?â she asks Loki as she sets a metal teapot and empty mug in front of him.
âPlease,â he says.
âYou got it.â She looks at you. âDidya get a chance to look at the menu or do you need a minute?â
Youâre feeling a little daring. âIâll try the Sunday Special as well.â
âAll right, two Sunday Specials cominâ right up,â she says, collecting your menus.
âSo, whatâs in a Sunday Special?â you ask Loki as you take a sip of your coffee.
âBoiled fish eggs, mainly,â he says, pouring the hot water into his tea mug.
âLiar,â you say promptly.
He raises an eyebrow. âYou didnât even look at the menu, how could you know?â
âPlaces like this donât serve fish eggs,â you say. âWay too unusual and definitely the wrong price point.â
âI suppose youâll just have to see,â he says with a playful glint in his eyes. The easy charm that youâve seen him use with the others is on full display and itâs enough to make you giddy. Maybe he doesnât dislike you after all.
âWell, if itâs fish eggs, youâre picking up the bill,â you say, âand Iâll be getting something else instead.â
âYouâd really hold me responsible for your impulsive dinner selections?â
âYep. And I donât even feel bad about it.â
He raises an eyebrow. âI didnât realize you could be so unforgiving.â
âWell, you donât know me all that well.â
âTo be fair, you keep to yourself quite a bit.â
âA little bit,â you say. âBut also to be fair, you havenât really asked.â
âOn work time?â he says, widening his eyes in mock horror. âThat would mean write ups for both of us, I couldnât let that happen.â
âI think I know enough about you to know that getting in trouble is not one of your primary concerns.â
He gives you a sly smile, like youâve caught him out and he likes it. âThatâs a diplomatic way to put it.â He takes a sugar packet from the dispenser on the table and tears it open before pouring it into his mug. âWell, weâre on break now, so you can safely tell me something about yourself.â
You drum your fingers on your coffee mug. âWhat do you want to know?â
âWell, this canât be the only part of your life. Who are you outside the TVA? What did you do before this?â
That giddy feeling comes to a screeching halt and you take in a long, slow breath. Itâs a simple question, one that most people can answer to some degree. For you, though, itâs a bit more complicated.
âWell,â you say. You take a sip of your coffee, mostly to give your hands something to do. âI donât actually knowâI chose not to remember when they gave me the option.â
Youâre surprised by how gentle his eyes are when you look up. âMy apologies,â he says, âI didnât realize.â
âItâs okay,â you say and you really do mean it. âYou couldnât have known.â
Usually, you say something like this and then gently redirect the conversation, but something about the way heâs looking at you makes you want to continue. Like maybe he understands difficult things and doesnât mind hearing about something that others would shy away from.
âWhen they told us everything and said they could fix our memoriesâŠâ You clear your throat and focus your gaze just above his shoulder. âItâs weird, but I just had a feeling that it wouldnât be good for me to knowâŠthat something really bad had happened. So I asked Mobius to check for me, just to be sureâŠâ You swallow, blinking hard.
You remember how sad Mobiusâ eyes were, how heâd gently placed a hand on your shoulder and said, âI think youâre making the right call, kid.â
âItâs not really okay, is it?â Loki says softly.
You shrug. âI mean, itâsâŠit is what it is.â
âYouâre a terrible liar, you know.â
âItâs not a lieââ
He raises a skeptical eyebrow and you remember that he is, in fact, the god of lies.
âItâs more likeâŠI canât really miss what I donât know, but at the same time, the reality of that absence hurts a little. So maybe not exactly okay, but not exactly not okay, either.â
Thereâs a lot of kindness in his gaze and you have to look away because it makes your head spin and your breath catch in your throat. âIâm not really sure if that makes sense,â you say.
âIt does.â
Thereâs a silence between you, but itâs not uncomfortable.
âDo youâŠdo you think youâd want to forget if you had that option?â Youâre not entirely sure what prompts the question and you regret it almost as soon as it leaves your mouth. âIâm sorry, thatâs probably too personal.â
He shakes his head and thereâs a warmth in his eyes that you donât expect. âI rather think I owe you one.â He pauses, running a finger around the rim of his mug. âSometimes I do,â he says finally. âIt can be quite painful remembering.â He worries his lip between his teeth. âBut Iâm not sure who I would be without the knowledge of my past, either.â His gaze flicks back to you. âWhatâs it like for you? Do you feel like you know who you are without those memories?â
Itâs a good questionâone youâve never been asked. âI mean, itâs hard to say for sure. I think I do,â you say. âSometimes I wonder if I was different in my timeline. Maybe I was kinder because I had different experiences that made me more empathetic. Maybe I wasnâtâmaybe I was worse. Maybe I had a villain arc.â
He chuckles. âThat doesnât seem likely.â
âI dunno, maybe it explains the vending machine coffee and my fish egg related threats,â you say and you feel almost giddy when he returns your smile. âOr maybe Iâm the same and all those experiences that shaped me are just scars I canât see.â You shrug and take a sip of your coffee. âAt the end of the day, though, that timeline is gone. Iâm all thatâs left. Itâs sad, but itâs also freeing, in a way.â
He nods. âMobius has said much the same.â
You smile slightly. âOur philosophies are similar, I suppose, though I think there are probably more bits of his past self in his present self than he realizes.â
Loki grins. âItâs the jet skis, isnât it?â
âI mean, I just donât think most normal people spend that much time expounding on the reliability of the Yamaha engine versus the pure, raw power of the Kawasaki.â
Loki holds up a finger. âBut have you gotten the lecture about Yamahaâs braking system?â
âI think I have that memorized at this point.â
ââThe perfect choice for families.ââ
ââYou just tap the brakes. Just tap them. Perfectly smooth stop every time.ââ
ââReliability meets affordability.ââ
ââYou canât say no to that.ââ
You think you probably could have riffed on this for a bit, but youâre interrupted by the arrival of Connie with your dinner.
The Sunday Special turns out to be a fairly traditional breakfastâeggs, hash browns, two fluffy pancakes, sausage, toast, a little bowl of strawberries.
âDefinitely lots of fish eggs in this meal,â you say to Loki after Connie leaves.
His smile is small, but genuine. âYou havenât looked under the pancakes yet.â
You feel it then, but you donât fully understand until later that this dinner has unlocked something important between the two of you. After months of awkward, stilted conversation, itâs like you finally understand how to talk to each other. And youâre surprised to find that even outside of your big stupid crush, you actually like Loki. You like his sly smiles and his dry humor and how easily the two of you fall into a routine of playful banter. You click in a way that surprises you, in a way that makes you mourn the lost potential of all those awkward, stilted months and feel giddy about the possibilities ahead.
Dinner is over too soon and you walk back to the TVA feeling revived from the coffee and the conversation.Â
Disaster awaits you back at the office, though: youâd left a stack of the Nero variant files on your desk and evidently the construction was too precarious, as the entire pile had tipped off your desk and spilled to the floor, contents scattered everywhere.
âFucking hell,â you sigh, running a hand through your hair. Youâre not sure whether you want to laugh, cry, or scream. Possibly, itâs all three.
âHere.â Loki is bending down on the floor to gather the files. You studiously try to not ogle his ass or thighs. Or at least not obviously. âClear off some space on your deskâIâll help.â
Twenty minutes later, youâve set up an entirely new systemâLoki has dragged his chair over to your desk and the cart of unsorted files sits between you, like a surly metallic chaperone. And even later when youâve sorted out all of the files from the floor, he remains parked at the end of your desk, a stack of new, unsorted files in front of him. Admittedly, itâs a lot more efficient for you to work like this: privately, though, it gives you a warm glow that has nothing to do with workplace efficiency.
âIâve invented a new game,â he says some time later.Â
âWhatâs that?â
âEvery time either one of us finds documentation showing Renato Lucchese losing money on a racehorse he was told was not a good investment, I get to have a drink.â
You look up at him. âLook, I know youâre a god and everything, but I am pretty sure that will kill you.â
He sighs and tosses the file into the Lucchese pile. âI think it would add a little excitement to the evening, donât you?â
You raise your eyebrows and look back at the file in front of you. âYou mean this isnât your idea of a fun Friday night?â
âMy idea of a fun Friday night includes far fewer files and a lot more debauchery,â he says, taking a new file from the cart.
You glance at the clock. âWell, itâs only eleven. I donât usually start body shots until after midnight.â
âWhat are body shots?â
For one horrifying moment, you think that youâre going to actually have to explain this to him, but then you get a good look at his expression.
Heâs teasing you.
âYouâre an ass,â you say, swatting him on the shoulder with the file youâre holding.
He wags a finger at you. âThatâs workplace violence. Iâm going to have to report that.â
You lean back in your chair and return to your file. âIâm pretty confident that youâll be put off by the amount of paperwork that process requires.â
He shakes his head as he returns to his own file. âUncontrolled bureaucracy is how bad actors escape accountability.â Thereâs a brief pause. âAndâŠthereâs another racehorse.â
You continue on like this for the rest of the evening, occasionally chatting and Loki proving definitively that the Renato Lucchese racehorse drinking game could not be played without resulting in a fatality. Itâs nice, though. Yes, itâs sorting files and yes, itâs not the most intellectually riveting task youâve ever done, but spending time with Loki is nice. Itâs because of this that you find yourself trying to stay awake, pushing past your looming exhaustion.
But around two, you canât quite fight the heaviness of your eyelids any longer and you doze off in the middle of a report on the sinking of the Lusitania.
âHey.â Loki is gently shaking your shoulder. The way he says your name in that deliciously deep voice makes you want to swoon and youâre glad that you have the ready made excuse of sleepiness to explain any embarrassing behavior on your end.
âI think youâd better call it a night,â he says gently. âGet some sleep and come back with fresh eyes.â
âWhat about you?â you say. âAre you going to do the same, or are you just all talk?â
He smiles at you and it warms you to the very tips of your toes. You could bask in that smile like a cat in a sunbeam.
âIâm starting to fade a bit myself,â he says
âVery convenient,â you say and he grins at you.
âCome on, Iâll see you back home.â
Part of you wants to protestâthereâs really no need for him to walk you homeâbut a larger, louder part of you wants to let it be, prolong the magic of tonight for just a little longer.
Thereâs a comfortable silence between the two of you as you walk out of the office together.Â
âWhat time do you think youâre going to come in tomorrow?â he asks as you approach the residential wing. âItâs probably sensible to coordinate our efforts a bit.â
âYeah, thatâs a good point,â you say. âI was thinking nine, but that will be dependent on how much coffee I have.â
âYes, about that,â he says. âI cannot stand idly by and watch you torture yourself with vending machine coffee.â
âWell, the cafeteria will be open, so I was going to torture myself with cafeteria coffee, which is at least thirty percent less over brewed.â
He clicks his tongue. âYouâre not making a compelling case for yourself.â
âTo be fair, itâs quite late and Iâve been staring at files for hours.â
âAll the more reason to get decent coffee,â he says. âWeâre going out for breakfast.â
You raise an eyebrow. âOh, we are?â
âConsider it an intervention,â he says. âIâll come collect you at eight.â
Youâre not quite sure if this is just his natural confidence and swagger coming through or if heâs flirting with you and this counts as a date.
âWhere are we going?â
âI know a place.â
*
The place in question turns out to be a food cart in Central Park in 1998.
âShould I even bother asking if you have supervisor approval for this?â you say, looking skeptically at the time door glimmering before you.
Loki scoffs. âI donât have a supervisor.â
âYou do. Itâs Mobius.â
âThat canât be right, weâre peers.â
âYouâre absolutely not. Did you read any of the onboarding materials?â
He ignores your question. âI donât see why Iâd even need a supervisor, honestly.â
You snort. âNeed I remind you of what happened at the Nixon inauguration?â
He spreads his hands in front of him. âItâs not my fault that Iâm the only one with a sense of humor.â
âIâm not entirely sure that was the problem,â you say. âGerald Ford is never going to be the same, from what I understand.â
Loki waves a dismissive hand. âHeâll be fine, the tail isnât permanent. Now, are you coming or not?â
You roll your eyes at him and make a halfhearted complaint about proper protocol, but you know that youâre walking through that time door and not looking back. You knew that before he even posed the question.
The food cart is owned by a man named Samir who has a wide smile and booming laugh. He talks to Loki like heâs a friend and he tells you that you have the prettiest eyes heâs ever seen. You are fairly certain heâs exaggerating, but you stuff a few extra bills into the tip jar anyway.
âI canât believe you fell for that,â says Loki as you walk away, each carrying a coffee and a brown paper bag with a breakfast sandwich.
âFell for what?â you say, batting your eyes at him. âI do have beautiful eyes.â
âIâve heard him say that on at least thirty separate occasions.â
âYeah, but this time he really meant it. I could tell.â
He rolls his eyes and leads you to a park bench overlooking a wide, grassy field. The leaves are just starting to change and the air has a little bit of a bite to it.Â
You sit down on the bench and take a sip of your coffee.
âIt is good coffee, Iâll give you that,â you say.
âSee,â says Loki, âyou canât go back to that vending machine sludge after this.â
âI mean, if itâs eleven oâclock at night and Iâm on a deadline, I can.â
âDarling. You have a TemPad.â
âLoki. Read the personnel manual.â
He wrinkles his nose. âItâs not really my genre.â
You roll your eyes and take out your breakfast sandwich. âWhat is your genre?â
He raises an eyebrow. âIs that a serious question?â
âOf course it is,â you say. âI love talking about books.â
He gives you a slight smile and takes a sip of his coffee. âA little bit of everything, honestly,â he says. âPhilosophy. Magical theory. History. Politics. Anything from Asgard, really, though it can be a bit more challenging getting some of those titles.â
âIâve had pretty good luck with the Library of the Sacred Timelineâhave you checked there yet?â
He frowns. âIâm not familiar.â
âOh, youâd like itâitâs on the eighteenth floor. Itâs intended to be a collection of the greatest works of literature from as many branches of the timeline as possible,â you say. âIt started as a research project, but people liked it and it just kind of evolved into this huge collection. Theyâve actually got a pretty sizeable collection of books from Asgard.â
Itâs like youâve told him that his personal paradise had been located on the eighteenth floor this entire time. âWill you show me?â
He is practically vibrating with the sort of anticipatory, manic energy that you typically would associate with Christmas morning right before you tear into presents. Itâs sweetly endearing.
âOf course.â
Ten minutes later, youâre leading him through the winding hallways on the eighteenth floor. Youâre not surprised he hasnât heard about the libraryâitâs a bit out of the way and the eighteenth floor is so poorly designed that itâs not terribly easy to find.
The design of the library is a sharp departure from the rest of the TVA. The shelves and floors are made of the kind of dark mahogany that you typically see in the kind of estates that look like something directly out of a Jane Austen novel. Worn oriental rugs muffle your footsteps on the creaky wood floors and the air smells faintly of dust and paper.
Thereâs a subtle change in Loki when you walk through the doorsâalmost like a muscle in his shoulders finally relaxes and he seems truly at home for the first time since he arrived.
You touch his hand. âThis way.â
You lead him into the stacks, back to the far corner, right after the books from Alfheim.
âYou can borrow whichever ones you like,â you say softly. âThereâs a sign out sheet at the front desk.â
He nods, though you donât think he really hears youâhe only has eyes for the shelves, his gaze sweeping across the spines like theyâre old friends. Youâre about to excuse yourself to give him a little privacy when his brow furrows and he exhales sharply. âOh, you canât be serious.â
âWhat is it?â
They have the entirety of the finest Asgardian literature at their disposal. Untold centuries of the writings of our greatest mindsââ he plucks a book off the shelf, ââand they choose to include this?â
The title looks fairly innocuousâa red, leather bound book with the title The Cloistered Heart embossed in gold script on the front. You take the book from him and open it. âWhatâs the problem with this?â
âItâs inconsequential fluff, literary pablum of the highest order.â
This is the Loki that youâre more familiar with and a smile curls at your lips. Almost on cue, you flip the book open to a chapter titled âThe Wedding and Bedding of Aloisa.â
You bite back a laugh and look up at him. âItâs a romance novel.â
âPrecisely my point,â he says. âTo think that this is on the same shelf as Nielsen and Auber.â
âThatâs kind of how libraries work,â you say, flipping further into the book. The phrases âthrobbing lengthâ and âeager moansâ draw your eye and you have to tamp down another laugh. âOh, and itâs a sexy romance novel.â
âIt appeals to the lowest common denominator, yes.â
âWhat, so youâre too good for a bodice ripper?â
He scoffs. âI prefer to do the bodice ripping myself, not read some overwrought description of it.â
You are glad youâre looking at the book because youâre pretty sure youâd disintegrate if you had to make eye contact with him while he delivered that line. âOh spare me,â you say lightly, snapping the book shut and drawing it to your chest. âIâm gonna read this.â
He blows out a puff of air. âItâs a waste of your time.â
âIâve got lots of time, I can afford to waste it,â you say cheekily. âBesides, Iâm curious to see what kind of book turns the god of mischief into a pearl clutching prude.â
Loki sputters. âPrude? Darling, let me assure you, Iâm no prudeââ
âIâll leave you to browse,â you say with a grin as you turn away from him. âCome find me at the front when youâre ready to go.â
Youâre a few chapters into the book when Loki rejoins you at the front of the library, a small stack of books tucked under his arm.
You close your book with a snap. âThis book is a delight. I think your real issue is just that youâre no fun.â
He scoffs. âIâm very fun.â
âCouldâve fooled me.â
You bicker playfully back and forth as you check out your books and leave the library. A quick glance at your watch tells you that you spent much more time there than youâd planned. You canât quite bring yourself to worry about that, though, not with the memory of Lokiâs wonderstruck expression burning so bright in your mind.
Thereâs a bit of a lull in the conversation as you wait for the elevator.
âThank you,â he says softly.
âFor what?â
âFor showing me that.â
âOf course. Iâm sorry you didnât know about it sooner.â
He looks at you, lips parting slightly like heâs about to say something. His tongue swipes briefly over his bottom lip and you would swear that his gaze drops to your mouth for just a second.
For just a secondâone heady, slightly irrational secondâyou think he might be about to kiss you.
The ding of the elevator arriving breaks the spell, startling you just a little. You run a hand through your hair, trying to give off the impression of composure even as your heart beats wildly in your chest.
Loki gestures to the elevator doors. âAfter you.â
There is a group of analysts in the elevator already, chatting animatedly and completely obliterating any chance you may have had at recapturing that moment.
You try not to dwell too much in contemplating what ifs or timeline branchesâoften, it feels too much like work, something Mobius might assign you.
But you know that the possibility of that momentâwhat if the elevator had been a hair slower, what if those analysts had taken a different route, what if you were braverâyou know thatâs something thatâs going to haunt you for a while.
*
You wouldnât give up that time in the library for anythingâitâs one of those moments that feels formative, something that youâll return to again and again for one reason or another.
But itâs also true that itâs time that you probably could have used for sorting files and as Saturday ticks on, you canât help but wish you had a way to pull another hour out of somewhere.
âWeâre not going to be able to make this deadline, are we?â you say with a sigh.
Itâs getting late into the evening and the cart of files still to be sorted still remains depressingly full, despite the fact that youâd brought both lunch and dinner back to your desk so you could continue working.
Loki eyes the remaining files. âI think we might. We made good progress today.â
You rub your eyes. âMy brain feels like itâs about to leak out my ears.â
Loki takes the file you are working on and sets it back in the stack of unsorted files. âI think that might be a sign itâs time to turn in,â he says.
âThereâs still so much left.â
âThereâs still tomorrow.â
You reach for the file. âWell, let me justââ
He pulls your hand away from the pile. âYou can come back to it in the morning. Besides, if youâre this tired, youâre not going to do good work anyway.â
He squeezes your hand and drops it. Itâs brief enough to still be friendly, but unusual enough to make you wonder and send your mind racing back to that moment by the elevator.
You shake the thought away. Itâs late and youâre tired.
You heave a world weary sigh and slump back in your chair. âI hate it when youâre right.â
To his credit, he only smirks a little. âCome on. Iâll walk you back.â
Once again, thereâs no reason for him to do this, but once again, youâre inclined to let him.
You pack up for the evening and walk out of the office side by side. Youâre trying very hard not to think about the fact that this is likely the last night that youâll do this, that tomorrow the assignment will be over.
As you near the residential wing, you start to hear distant shouts. If you inhale deeply, you catch a very faint whiff of explosivesâyouâre not sure what kind.
âI think someone brought work home,â you say with a sigh.Â
This happens from time to timeâthings get out of hand in the field or something happens when retrieving an asset or a target and all hell breaks loose at the TVA. Mobius had once referred to it as âbringing work homeâ and the name had stuck.
âWasnât there an incident in this wing not long ago?â asks Loki.
âYes.â You sigh, running a hand through your hair. âI had to call off the next dayâI got no sleep that night.â You listen carefully, trying to determine the source of the noise and the status of the problem. âBut maybe itâs almost over,â you say with an optimism you donât fully feel. âSometimes these things are resolved really quick.â
Your heart continues to sink the closer you come to your home. The acrid burn of explosives only increases and you think you catch the low, dull roar of something not quite human.
And indeed, when you turn the final corner, you are immediately stopped by an electric blue barrier being monitored by a hunter. G-21âyouâve worked with her on a couple of missions before.
âAre you fucking kidding me?â slips out of your mouth before you can stop yourself.
âThereâs an ongoing incident in this area,â says G-21 and you almost want to laugh because no shit.Â
âHow long do you think itâs gonna be closed off?â you ask.
She shrugs. âWeâre at a code 54 right now, but itâs probably gonna escalate.â
With pitch perfect timing and before you can even try to remember what a code 54 means, thereâs an almighty crash and a low bellow.
âGo!â she yells before running toward the commotion amid frantic calls for backup.
Loki is grabbing your wrist and pulling you into a run.
Your standard issue work shoes are comfortable enough on a day to day basis, but you certainly want to have words with whoever decided that leather soled shoes with absolutely no grips were a good choice for a building floored almost entirely in linoleum. In a low stakes situation, itâs meant occasionally you wipe out in the cafeteria and hurt nothing but your pride. In this situation, it means that Lokiâs firm grip on your hand is the only thing keeping you upright.
But thereâs a small mercy in that while you can still hear distant crashes and shrieks, whatever is happening down that hallway doesnât seem to be following you and eventually, you both slow to a brisk walk and Loki drops your hand.
You havenât even had a chance to consider where you are going to sleep tonight. You could probably curl up on that terrible couch in the office and just plan on getting up early enough to run back to your place for a quick shower and a change of clothesâŠassuming the incident resolves by thenâ
âYou can stay with me,â says Loki, as though he can hear you trying to sort this out.
âOh, thatâs okay, Iâll justââ
âIf you say youâre going to sleep on that terrible couch in the office, I will personally take you to the most boring governmental proceeding I can find and leave you there until you come to your senses.â
âSounds like a great place to fall asleep,â you say.
His eyes glint, but his tone brooks no arguments. âYouâre staying with me tonight.â
You sigh, but you canât think of a counterpoint. âWhen did you get so bossy?â
âDarling, Iâm a prince,â he says with a bit of a wry smirk. âItâs my birthright.â
Loki lives on the opposite end of the residential wing and his place looks quite a bit like yoursâheâs got an extra window in the kitchen but the floor plan is otherwise the same. A lot of his furniture is standard issue, but there are little details that make it seem more personal: an area rug with a bit of fraying on the edges, a painting of what you think is an Asgardian landscape, a vase filled with dried flowers so delicate they look like they might disintegrate if you were to touch them. And booksâso many books. Books on shelves, stacked on the coffee table, tucked into the little rack that you know is meant to hold magazines. Hardbacks, paperbacks, leather bound, dog-eared, well-worn and brand new. Itâs no wonder he was so excited about the library.
âHave a seat,â he says, gesturing to the couch. âIâll get some things for you.â
You sit down and he disappears down the hall. You idly examine the books stacked on the end table next to you. Many are quite clearly from Asgard and it sparks a pang of sympathyâitâs like his homesickness is on full display in his living room and thereâs something sweet and sad about seeing that vulnerability laid so bare.
He returns a few minutes later with a pair of pajamas, a toothbrush, and a hand towel.
âHere,â he says, handing you the pile. âBathroomâs just down the hall. Iâll make up a bed for you.â
âThanks.â
In the bathroom, you realize that the pajamas heâs given you arenât the standard set you can order from the TVA. These are made of a dark emerald silk that ripples over your skin like water, and somehow, that makes it feel a thousand times more personal than if heâd loaned you a standard set. They donât fit quite right on you, but theyâll work well enough for tonight.
You brush your teeth and attempt to get through as much of your evening routine as you can before collecting your clothes and exiting the bathroom.
When you return to the living room, you expect to find that heâs made up a bed for you on the couch. These living units only have one bedroomâit would be quite reasonable to have you sleep on the couch.
You do not expect to find a pajama clad Loki stretched out reading on the couch, a blanket over his lap and his head propped up on a pillow like he intends to sleep there.
You exhale slowly. âPlease tell me you are not giving up your bed.â
âDonât be absurd, of course I am,â he says without even looking up from his book. âThe point of this was to prevent you from sleeping on a couch, not simply put you on a couch in a different location.â
You wish you had something to throw at him. âYou donât even fit on that couch.â
âLuckily, my knees bend. Besides, youâre a guest,â he says, as though that settles it.
You roll your eyes and plunk yourself down in the armchair across from the couch, setting your pile of clothes on the floor. âIâm not moving until you give up the couch.â
He finally looks up from his book. âYouâre really going to do this?â
You examine your fingernails, flicking away an invisible speck of dust. âIâm not the one being unreasonable. Iâm simply meeting you at your level.â
âIf you think that Iâm being unreasonable and youâre also saying youâre meeting me at my level, does that not mean you are admitting that you are being unreasonable?â
âItâs nearly one oâclock in the morning. Iâm not arguing semantics with you.â
âFine.â His eyes glimmer as he sets his book down and slowly rises to his feet. âBut youâre still not sleeping on the couch.â
âOh, youâre going to be so disappointed when you realize how wrong you are,â you say. You think you see your opening and you try to play it cool.
Heâs walking toward you, leaving your path to the couch wide open. In your head, you can see exactly how this works: youâll spring from your chair and dart around the coffee table before diving onto the couch like a baseball player sliding into home plate, soundly defeating Loki. Easy peasy.
Instead, what happens is that you spring to your feet and Loki moves with inhuman speed, grabbing you around your waist and pinning you to the front of his chest, stopping you in your tracks almost immediately.
âI suppose I should have expected that,â he says. Your back is facing him, but you can almost hear the dry, sardonic look heâs giving you.
âProbably,â you say. âGod of mischief and all.â You struggle fruitlessly against his iron grip. âYou can let me go now.â
He laughs. âIâm afraid I canât. It was clearly a mistake to trust you. I wonât be making that error again.â
âI donât know what youâre talking about,â you say, trying again to squirm away from him. âLet me go.â
âThe interesting thing about all of this is that youâve made a rather substantial tactical error,â he says, continuing as though he canât hear you.
âYouâre bluffing,â you say with more confidence than you feel.
âFascinating theory,â he says, âbut I donât think itâs going to work out for you.â
With that same ridiculous speed, heâs suddenly spinning you around and lifting you, tossing you easily over his shoulder.
âHey!â you shout in protest.
âI warned you,â he says, his voice full of mirth as he carries you toward the bedroom.
This is not exactly how youâve imagined being carried off to bed by Loki.
Though, admittedly, you do have a nice view of his ass.
âThis is ridiculous,â you say.
âYou brought this upon yourself.â Heâs walking into the bedroom and a moment later, heâs lifting you from his shoulder and tossing you unceremoniously onto his bed.
You scramble to your feet and try to lunge toward the door, but heâs clearly expecting that. Before your feet even hit the floor, he catches you around the waist and hauls you back to the bed. Your back hits the mattress and you try to leverage the momentum to propel yourself back onto your feet.
He catches you immediately and you find yourself back on the bed again.
âI donât mean to be patronizing,â he says, failing to bite back a laugh, âbut itâs adorable that you think you can outmaneuver me.â
That is deeply offensive and the only way you can earn my forgiveness is by letting me take my rightful place on the couch.â You canât quite keep the laugh from your voice.
He grins. âNot a chance.â
You attempt to dive off the opposite side of the bed, only to have him grab you by the ankles and pull you back. You manage to dislodge him and lunge in the opposite direction, only to be immediately thwarted.
It becomes increasingly hilarious the longer it goes on and soon your sides are aching from laughter. Loki is laughing too, but it doesnât seem to affect his strength or speed at all.
Eventually, he wrestles you back down onto the bed and you are fairly certain thereâs no way out of this oneâheâs got your wrists pinned above your head and his legs locked around yours. Youâre both a little out of breath.
âYield,â he says.
You shake your head. âNever.â
His gaze flicks to your lips and back to your eyes. âYield.â
âNo.â
Something has changed. Thereâs an electricity and intensity that crackles in the air between you, possibilities blooming in both of your gazes. It feels a little like that moment by the elevator, but youâre afraid to hope, afraid to even wish because the idea of him wanting you still feels as impossible as capturing smoke with a net.Â
But the way heâs looking at you, the way his gaze keeps drifting between your eyes and your lipsâŠthatâs not nothing.
âYield.â
You lick your lips, your heart beating wildly. âNo.â
Is it just your imagination, or did his breath hitch when you licked your lips?
âYield.â
God, heâs so close and you want him so badly.Â
âNo.â
He looks again at your lips and this time, he closes the distance between you.
They call him Silvertongueâyouâve heard the jokes, youâve rolled your eyes at all of them. But as he kisses you, you realize that thereâs an element of truth there because only seconds in and youâre ready to sign away your soul to live under the power of Lokiâs tongue. The slow, warm slide of it against yours, the way he guides your mouth against his, the way he lets out a soft sigh as he tastes youâyou would give up everything if it meant you could stay like this.
âYield,â he breathes against your lips.
âNo,â you say.
He deepens the kiss, catching your lower lip between his teeth and gently tugging until you whimper and arch against him.
He still has your hands pinned against the bed, his grip unyielding when you try to wrestle them away.
âLet me touch you,â you say when he draws back. You want to touch him everywhereârun your hands along every muscle youâve admired from afar.Â
âThen yield,â he says with a grin, his eyes flashing with devilish intent.
You consider this for a moment. You could give inâthere arenât really any stakes at this point and youâre pretty sure youâre both going to end up sleeping in his bed tonight anyway. But that glint of mischief in his eyes also promises some intriguing possibilities if you stand firm.
âNo,â you say.
âSuch a pity,â says Loki, though his expression is one of hungry delight.
His hands slip free of your wrists then, but they stay pinned to the bed by some invisible force.
âCheater,â you say.Â
âI think this is only fair,â he says, his hands sliding to your hips. âIâm clearly the victor, am I not entitled to my prize?â
You shiver. âYour prize?â
âYes.â He kisses down the column of your throat. âMy lovely, lovely prize.â
âHow can I be your prize if Iâm also your competitor?â
âYou think too much,â he mumbles against your neck.
âYou say that like itâs a bad thing.â
âGenerally, itâs not.â He sits back on his heels between your legs, looking you over with satisfaction. âBut in this case, itâs distracting you from more pressing matters.â His hands creep under the hem of your shirt, stroking the small of your back, thumbs tracing teasingly along the waistband of your pajama pants.Â
âHave I mentioned how much I enjoy seeing you in my clothes?â he asks. Thereâs a husky depth to his voice and a hunger in his eyes that sends a flood of arousal to your cunt.
âYou have not,â you say.
âA casualty of too much thinking,â he says solemnly, his thumbs gently grazing the skin at your hipbones. âYou look utterly delectable. I almost want to leave them on.â His eyes glitter with mischief. âAlmost.â His hand strays to the bottom button on your pajama top. âMay I?â
You nod. âYes.â
He slips the button free and slowly makes his way up until your shirt is open. He carefully pushes the fabric aside, baring your breasts to his sight and touch.
Youâve never felt more beautiful seeing Loki stare at you, lips slightly parted, eyes wide and hungry. He trails one hand up your stomach and rib cage and slowly brushes a thumb over your nipple. You gasp and the sensitive skin puckers and stiffens as he palms your breast, rolling your nipple between his thumb and forefinger.
âGorgeous,â he murmurs as he lowers his mouth to your breast, his tongue and lips taking up the role of his hand, while his other hand moves to cup your other breast. You whimper, wishing you could run your hands through his hair. âThatâs it,â he purrs, âI want to hear all the sounds you can make, my love.â
You rock your hips forward and arch your back as he lavishes attention on your breasts. Itâs the most delicious kind of torture, having him so close, but not being able to touch him.
Heâs taking his time, which you both love and hate. He feels so good, but you need him to touch you, you need to touch him, you need him inside of you. You wait until you canât take it any more and breathe his name like itâs a prayer.
You wonder if this is what he was waiting for because with little more than a brief smirk and a wicked look, he starts kissing his way back up your chest and neck. You whimper when his lips meet yours and you can feel him grin as he kisses you. He fits his hips against yours, angling himself so that his cock rubs up against your clit just right and you moan into his mouth. You can tell that heâs big and part of you wants to savor the anticipation even though you feel like you might go mad if he doesnât fuck you now. You rock your hips against him, trying to feel that friction.
His large hands frame your face, one hand sliding to cradle the back of your head so he can draw you deeper, the other trailing from your cheek to your throat.
Both hands soon stroke down your sides, lingering teasingly at the waistband of your pajama pants. He hooks his thumbs underneath the waistband and you lift your hips. He slides your pants down maybe an inch and you can feel him smiling as he kisses you. You lift your hips again and your waistband creeps down another inch.
âLoki.â His name falls from your lips with a sigh.
âWhat is it, my love?â
âTouch me,â you breathe. âPlease.â
You lift your hips again and this time, he pulls the fabric fully down and off your legs. He guides your legs apart and stares appreciatively at your bare cunt, his teasing expression replaced by a rapt awe.
âBeautiful,â he murmurs.Â
You believe him.
His hands stroke your thighs, seemingly in no hurry, despite your pleading whimpers and the way you arch against the mattress. He draws his thumb gently along your slit, barely grazing your clit.
âDo you know what an utter distraction itâs been sitting behind you?â he asks, tracing your clit in the slowest, lightest circle.
You arch upward, hands still bound by his magic. âTell me,â you breathe, your hips rising to chase his hand.
âEvery time you stood up, I could only think about bending you over the desk.â
You manage a sly smirk. âAnd here I thought you didnât like me much at all.â
His thumb presses a little more against your clit and you moan.
âIâve wanted you from the moment I saw you,â he says, rolling his thumb in a slow circle. âI kept you at armâs length partly as a matter of protection.â
For who?â
âYou,â he says. âIâm not fully redeemed in some eyes and you being involved with a dangerous variantââ
âYouâre not,â you say.
âSome would disagree.â
âWell, theyâre wrong,â you say. âYouâre not a dangerous variant. Youâre Loki Laufeyson and I want you just as you are.â
Thereâs something unreadable in his expression and it makes you wonder how many people have told him that he can just be himself.
âYou should be careful saying such lovely things to me, you know,â he says solemnly.
You raise an eyebrow. âOh really? And why is that?â
âBecause it makes me want to do very wicked things to you.â
Youâre surprised youâre not shaking, you want him so badly. âWhat kinds of wicked things?â
âOh, all manner of wicked things.â He presses a kiss to the inside of your knee, his tongue swiping briefly against your skin. âThings with my mouth...â His thumb rolls over your clit again, his index finger teasing your entrance before retreating. ââŠmy handsâŠâ He drags his gaze over your naked form before locking eyes with you. âMy cock.â
A shiver works its way up your spine. âSo if I talk about how I think youâre really clever and funny and I find it unbelievably sexy, what sort of wicked thing would that merit?â
The intensity of his gaze makes you shiver again. He crouches down and presses another kiss against the inside of your knee, slowly moving upward. âIf you keep talking like that, Iâm not going to let you leave my bed for days.â
âYou know thatâs not a disincentive, right?â you say, sucking in a sharp breath as he nips at the soft skin of your inner thigh. âIâve wanted you for such a long time, Loki.â
âIâll make it weeks if youâre not careful.â
âAgain, not a disincentive.â You gently tug at your bound wrists and find that theyâre still firmly secured. Itâs exhilarating, even though you really wish you could run your hands through his hair, especially if he ends up where you think heâs going.
âWhat else should I tell you?â you muse as he continues his agonizingly slow path along your thigh. âYou know, half the reason I kept to myself was that I wanted you so much I was certain that Iâd make a fool of myself.â
That earns you a few circles of your clit with his thumb, but his progress up your thigh remains slow. You have a theory about what might move the needle, though.
âI know you like to act like youâre this sort of barely reformed villain, but I think thereâs more good in you than youâd like people to believe.â
This time, he moves up to the crease where your thigh joins your hip, close enough that you can feel the heat of his breath ghosting along your labia. His tongue traces a line along your skin and you briefly wonder if youâll be able to hold it together enough to deliver the last part.
âAnd,â you say, trying to keep your voice steady, âyesterday and today made me want you even more because I feel like I finally saw who you really are and youâre even more wondââ
Your words abruptly give way to a breathy moan because his perfect, skilled tongue has finally found its way to your clit.
You had a plan from here, but whatever it was has dissolved into nothing under the skilled caress of Lokiâs tongue. You suspected he would be good at this from the way that heâd kissed you earlier, but you could not have imagined that it would feel like this.
âOh my god, Loki.â Your thighs are already quaking. You tug again at the invisible bonds on your wrists, but they hold fast. Something about the way the bonds are keeping you gently stretched along the bed combined with how his large hands have your thighs spread open seems to heighten every sensation. Thereâs no wiggling away from him or adjusting yourself so that you feel more or less of the onslaught of his tongue on your cunt. You are completely at his mercy and youâre not entirely surprised that you fucking love it.
He slides a finger into your aching channel and your cunt shudders around the thick intrusion. The warm, roiling center of your orgasm starts builds in your hips with every stroke of his tongue, spinning faster and faster, like ocean winds whipping up into a hurricane. Your back arches and his tongue presses flat against your clit, and suddenly you know that this is going to be what takes you over the edge.
Loki seems to know it too, at least from the way that he presses his tongue more firmly against you, one arm slung across your hips to hold you in place. His other hand slides two fingers inside you, rocking and curling against that aching, tender spot.
You whimper, your hips bucking wildly. Itâs so good and so much and you are almost there.
You look down at him then, his hair wild, hollowed cheeks flushed pink as his tongue works you over, his eyes closed like he couldnât imagine anything more blissful than being in between your legs while you come undone.
This is ultimately what tips you over the edge. The storm that has been forming inside you is finally let loose and you arch your back and cry out in a wordless scream as your climax crashes into you.
Only then do the bonds around your wrists release and your hands fly down to grab his hair as your body shakes with pleasure.
It takes a moment for you to get your breath back and reacquaint yourself with the concept of speech, but when you do, you find Loki looking up at you, his expression pure mischief.
âAnd to think you wanted to sleep on the couch.â
âIt wasnât that I wanted to sleep on the couch, itâs thatââ Your voice cuts off as his tongue starts stroking your clit again.
âItâs what?â he asks in between strokes, his smirk obvious in his voice. The lingering ripples of your orgasm are coalescing around the path of his tongue, tightening that coil in your belly again.
âFuckâyouâre not playing fair, you canât justââ You lose your sentence to a low moan that rises up from your chest. âYou canât justâfuck, yesâyou canâtâŠoh god, yes, just like that.â
His laughter rumbles against you as your hips start rocking against his mouth. How are you already so close?
âYou canât justâfuckâwin an argument byââ
Youâre trying to say that he canât expect to win an argument by making you come and you think he might understand this based on how determined he seems to be to prove you wrong. His fingers curl again until he finds that soft, tender spot that is so often the key to your unraveling.
You have stopped trying to complete that sentenceâyou moan, your hands tangling in his hair, urging him on as the swell of your climax rushes up, inevitable as a tidal wave looming over a seaside village.
You cry out as it crests and breaks, falling down over you in a rush of tingling pleasure that feels like champagne and fireworks all at once.
âNow, what was it you were saying, my love?â he asks as he releases your clit a moment later. âSomething about how I canât just win an argument by making you come? I couldnât quite hear you over the sound of you coming completely undone on my tongue.â
âOh, you think youâre so smart,â you say, giving him a stern look as he crawls up your body.
âYou know what I think?â he says, settling himself on his side next to you. âI think you liked submitting to me.â
You shiver before you can even think about hiding it and his smile turns decidedly vulpine.Â
âYou did, didnât you? You liked having your hands bound and being completely at my mercy while I licked your pretty cunt until you came undone in my mouth.â
âYou are enjoying this far too much,â you say.
âI am enjoying it the correct amount.â
You realize your hands are now free to explore his body and you tug at his pajama shirt. âI think youâre wearing too many clothes,â you say.
He gives you a wicked grin as he lets you pull his shirt over his head. âYes, perhaps itâs time we even things up.â
You pull the shirt away and rake your eyes over him greedily, your hands following the path of your gaze. He is as perfect as you imagined, unfairly beautiful in the dim light of the bedroom.
You hook your thumbs into the waistband of his pajama pants and lower them an inch, a cheeky parallel of how he teased you earlier. His lips curl into a sharp smile when he realizes what youâre doing.
âInteresting strategy.â Thereâs a bit of a growl in his voice, a rough desperation that makes your cunt clench. âBut I think you forgot that I have the upper hand here.â
He raises his hand and with a twist of his wrist, his remaining clothes dissolve in a shimmer of green and he is bare before you.
Your breath catches in your throat. His cock commands your immediate attention, nudging up against your thighâheâs big, as you suspected, but completely bare and rock hard, he somehow seems longer and thicker than he had when he was grinding against you.
He pulls you into a slow kiss as you reach for his cock. You wrap your hand around him, delighting in the silky hardness of him, the way he throbs in your hand and the low groan he makes as your hand moves from base to tip and back, the way his hips thrust along with you. Your cunt clenches in anticipation.
After a moment, though, he places his hand over yours, slowing your movements.
âI need to be inside you,â he rasps.
âYes,â you breathe.
He rolls on top of you and youâre not sure that youâve ever felt anything quite as wonderful as the heat of his bare skin and yours pressed together. This feeling means intimacy, a closeness that youâd longed for but never expected even in your wildest daydreams.
He pulls you into a kiss, slow, soft, and languid, like you have all the time in the world and he intends to take it. Itâs decadent and dreamy and perfect.
But the heavy weight of his bare cock resting against your stomach combined with the ache between your legsâan ache that would be so perfectly soothed by the hard column of flesh currently throbbing against youâproves to be a force too powerful to resist for very long.
You cant your hips against him, snaking one leg around his waist, hoping heâll get the hint.
He does.
He braces himself on one hand, the other sliding between your bodies to rub his cock along your slick folds. He positions himself at your entrance, waiting for your breathy plea to begin to ease himself slowly into you.
He fills and stretches you in the most wonderful way, but even more than that, he feels like home. The thought strikes you quite suddenly and youâre not entirely sure about everything it means, but you know itâs good and right.
He pauses for just a moment, seeming to savor the feeling.
âYou feel better than I ever imagined,â he says.
You quirk an eyebrow at him. âYou imagined?â
He gives you a hungry smile as he leans in to kiss you. âLike I said: it has been an utter distraction sitting behind you.â
His rhythm is slow and easy, like he wants to take his time learning every inch of you and memorizing how you react to his touch. His mouth moves over yours in a slow kiss thatâs somehow both languid and demanding, his tongue gliding in and out of your mouth in the same rhythm of his hips rocking into you. His cock bumps up against that sweet spot inside of you that his fingers had teased earlier, each stroke inching you closer to bliss.
He shifts the angle of his hips so that his pubic bone grinds against your clit and it feels so good you almost see stars. You can feel your orgasm building, your cunt growing slicker and tensing around his thrusting cock.
He draws back to look at you, eyes hazy with a loose, dreamy kind of pleasure.
âDo you have any idea how good you feel?â he breathes.
You are shaking. âLoki, Iâm gonna come.â
âI know you are,â he purrs. âLet go for me, let me feel you, my love.â
With two more thrusts of his hips, you unravel.
He groans as you tremble around him, but mostly, he watches your face, rapt by the way you throw your head back against the bed and gasp his name like itâs the only thing that will save you.
âYouâre beautiful when you come,â he breathes. âAbsolutely stunning.â
He waits until you catch your breath before he kisses you again, slow and sensual. His hips are still rocking in that beautifully slow rhythm and you donât know how it can still feel so good.
He keeps moving against you, his touch and his low murmurs of praise invoking a symphony of sensations. He presses deeper and your body sings with every thrust, your muscles tensing and tightening around him like you never want him to leave. Your climax swells again and you come with a whimper, your whole body shaking as he fucks you through it.
You want him to come, want to hear the sounds he makes and feel his sweet, hot release burning inside of you.
âI want you to come for me,â you breathe.
He grins at you. âOh, I will, but not yet. Youâre not done yet.â
You whimper. âLokiââ
âTwo more, my love, two more and then Iâll come for you.â
Somehow, you give him three. By the second one, heâs panting and his words have become rough, his voice a growl as he utters some of the filthiest praise youâve ever heard. The third builds quickly after that and you know instinctively that youâre going to take him over the edge with you this time.
You fight to keep your eyes open against the tidal wave of pleasure blooming again in your hips. You need to see him come undone.
As in everything else he does, heâs unfairly beautifulâhe throws his head back, letting out a low groan that you can feel all the way to the tips of your toes. His cheeks are flushed, a few ink dark curls plastered to the light sheen of sweat on his forehead. You can feel him emptying himself inside you, his release hot and hard won.
It seems to last a long time and itâs another minute before his hips slow to a halt. He kisses you, so soft and sweet it would almost seem chaste were it not for the fact that his cock is still throbbing inside of you.
After a moment, he slowly eases out of you, rolling over onto his back, his arm snaking around your waist and pulling you to him like he canât bear to be parted from you even for a moment.
You curl up against his side, your legs tangling with his. He takes your hand, lacing his fingers with yours before resting your clasped hands on his heart.
You could fall in love like this, you think sleepily to yourself.
You donât know it then, but youâre right.
*
Time moves differently at the TVA, but a couple years later, thereâs a ring in a box on your desk.
Loki likes a spectacle and youâd daydreamed about a traditional wedding, but when you talk it over, you both agree that you want to do something different, something quiet, something just for the two of you.
âI do think we should tell Mobius beforehand,â you say to Loki.
âIsnât the point of eloping that no one knows until after itâs done?â says Loki.
âYes, but I feel like we could make one exception,â you say. âIf weâd done a full wedding, I would have asked him to give me away.â
Lokiâs gaze softens a bit then and he pulls you close. âAll right. But we only tell him right before we leave. The man canât keep a secret.â
But Mobius doesnât seem terribly surprised when you tell himâin fact, he seems far more concerned about your wedding gift.
âI didnât have a chance to wrap it yet,â he says. Heâs retrieved a large picture frame that had been propped against his desk, though he keeps it turned away from you. âSoâŠthis also requires a bit of an overdue confession for context.â
You raise your eyebrows. âA confession?â
âA confession,â says Mobius.
âWill I be angry about this?â asks Loki at the same time you say, âIs this like a go to jail confession or a misdemeanor confession?â
Mobius gives a good natured chuckle, shaking his head slightly. âGod, the two of you. Always so dramatic. No wonder you ended up together.â He takes what feels like an unnecessarily long drink from the coffee mug on his desk. âItâs not bad, I promise.â Another sip of coffee.Â
Loki sighs. âHe always does this,â he says to you. âHave you noticed? Whenever he has something that you want to know, he stalls and drags it out just to torment you.â
âOkay,â you say, âbut you jumping in to bicker with him probably doesnât help.â
âIâm not bickering,â says Loki. âIâm simply pointing out that heâs stallingââ
âWhat was it you were saying, Mobius?â you say brightly, nudging Loki with your elbow.
Mobiusâ eyes twinkle. âSee,â he says to Loki, âI always liked her. Itâs a good match.â
You donât have to look at Loki to know heâs rolling his eyes, though he also makes a point of surreptitiously pinching your ass, a detail you hope Mobius doesnât notice.
âAnyway,â says Mobius, taking a deep breath, âit was pretty clear to me from the start that you liked each other. And you also seemed absolutely determined to get in your own way.â He points to Loki. âEspecially you with your whole stilted Asgardian prince thing.â
Loki frowns. âWhat are you talking about?â
Mobius sighs. âAnytime you like someone, itâs like your brain gets a factory reset and you get all overly polite and courtly.â
Loki scoffs. âI donât do that at all.â
âYou do. Itâs deeply weird. Youâre like a mannerly robot.â
Loki turns to you. âDarling, tell him heâs being absurd.â
You reach over and squeeze his hand. âYou did call me âmy ladyâ a couple of times in the early days.â
Loki sighs and looks back at Mobius. âWhat was your point in mentioning this?â
âWell,â says Mobius, âyou seemed pretty determined to get in your own way, so nothing was happening. And eventually I got sick of all of the pining, so I decided to take matters into my own hands.â
âWhat do you mean?â
Mobius pauses, a hint of a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. âThere wasnât a breakthrough with Berlitz that weekend. What there was was a surplus in the overtime budget and a high priority indexing project for Archives.â
Your lips part as your brain slowly puts the pieces together. Mobiusâ eyes twinkle.
âWait,â you say, âyou lied to us?â
âI did not lie,â says Mobius, his demeanor suddenly becoming very serious. âThat would have been wrong.â He nods at Loki. âAlso, it wouldâve tipped him off and that would have ruined the whole thing. I simply failed to mention that the cart of files that I gave you needed to be sorted for indexing for the Archives department and I peppered in a couple of unrelated things about Berlitz.â
âBut the office was empty that weekend,â says Loki.
Mobius snaps his fingers. âRight. I did make some adjustments to the schedule that weekend.â
âAnd the disturbance that prevented her from returning home on Saturday night?â
Mobius spreads his hands wide and grins. âAll me, buddy. Paid G-21 five hundred bucks for that one.â
Loki pauses for a moment and then looks at you. âI donât think I can be mad about this. Iâm genuinely impressed.â
âI mean, I canât argue with the results, but Jesus, Mobius, you couldâve just set us up on a blind date,â you say.
âAh, but thatâs not as fun,â Mobius says. âPlus, it wouldnât have made for as good a wedding gift.â He turns the frame around and hands it to you both.
Itâs both your timecards from that pay period, neatly framed side by side. Your eyes well with tears and Mobius smiles.
âHonestly, Iâm just relieved itâs not a jet ski,â says Loki.
âHe's deflecting,â you say to Mobius in an exaggerated whisper.
âI know,â he whispers back.
But you canât help but notice that Lokiâs eyes are brighter than normal.
âOkay, now get out of here,â says Mobius. âYouâve got a wedding to get to.â
Twenty minutes later, youâre wearing a simple white dress and standing with Loki in front of a time door, your hand clasped in his.
âTechnically, we donât have a supervisorâs approval for this,â you say with a wry smile.
He looks at you, eyes dancing with mirth. âI had Mobius sign off on the paperwork while you were getting ready.â
Your heart swells and your smile is so wide that you feel like your face might split in two. âThen hurry up and marry me, Laufeyson.â
He grins and tugs you through the time door.
-------
But wait! There's more: I don't have a masterlist for this, but if you enjoy these idiots, check out Daylight, a sort of sequel.
#loki smut#loki x reader#loki x reader smut#loki laufeyson smut#loki x female reader smut#loki x female reader#loki laufeyson#loki fanfiction#loki fanfic#tva loki x reader
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Heyoooo, i just read your say it louder and im in love with that so much like holy, so i was wondering if you could make something kinda similar or something? like maybe logans chasing reader because she stole his cigars and they have a cute moment or something along those lines, maybe end a bit with or with smut? thanks so much babes!
Mine Now | DOFP!Logan Howlett x F!Reader
Warnings: Primal!Logan, Scent Tracking, Shotgunning His Cigar, Marking, Implied Smut, Reader is a Mutant who has invisibility, Enemies to Lovers because Iâm a sucker for pain, Takes place at the very end of DOPF when Logan comes back to the future, Pain Kink, Breathing Play, Choking, Claws come out â I repeat the claws come out,
Rating: R â No Minors
Word Count: 4.5K
Authorâs Note: Thank you so much for your request! This was a blast to write and honestly? It gave me a good excuse to write for DOFP!Logan! I adore you! đ Also completely unrelated side noteâŠ.you did say you wanted smut, right??? Because I may, or may not, have spaced you said cutesy and went right to horny.
To be tagged in any future work of mine, please fill this out.
âHank, have you seen her?â Logan asks, his voice layered with annoyance. You couldnât help but silently snicker as you watched his brow crease, his nose twitch with frustration, his finger rapping at his side impatiently. The way his jaw ticked as Hank narrowed his own eyes at him made it impossible to hold your laughter, even when you were currently pressed up against the wall â a clear view of the situation going down. You pulled your lip between your teeth as you homed in on Loganâs features, eyes glimmering with rage. It was such a beautiful sight to see, one you have been dreaming of for months. Though youâd never openly admit it, everyone knew, all except him. You had to make the chase worth his while.
Logan Howlett is a force to be reckoned with, everyone told you that. When Charles and Eric first recruited you to teach with them in New York â you thought it was a joke, a cruel one at that. Living paycheck to paycheck in a hole in the wall Hellâs Kitchen apartment, dealing with constantly screaming and fighting from your neighbors, it wasnât where you wanted to be. You were a survivor, you could adapt to anything, but after what you had experienced, you needed a fresh start. Working at a local diner, making shit for tips wasnât ideal, but it was enough to help you save to leave. Where would you go prior to this? You had no idea, but someplace that experiences winter â you always loved the snow. But alas, that dreary November day a few years ago changed everything; It changed you. Meeting Logan on your first day told you everything you needed to know about him â he refuses to get close to anyone, you wanted to break that.
It's been three years since you first met Logan, two since you found yourself thinking he was cute, a year since you felt yourself falling for him, and six months since you started the cat and mouse chase. At first with how standoffish Logan was to you, you started to resent him. A year it took before that all fell to the wayside; Your feelings had shifted when you found him outside one night, crying as he smoked his cigar. Of course, your mutation left you able to turn invisible, able to watch him, without him knowing you were there. Through the heavy rain your smell was masked, he couldnât tell you were there. But it made you feel closer to him; He wasnât some robot who didnât have emotions. He felt them too strong, which is why when he started to slip back into his mind, he pulled away. Being over 200 years old meant he saw some shit, lost people he loved, it took a toll on him after a while. That day forward you stopped keeping your distance, but instead made the effort to be near him, to show him you werenât going anywhere.
Slowly you noticed how Logan started to open up to you, telling you stories of when he was young, his first mission with the X-Men. You got to learn a lot about The Wolverine, and come to find out he wasnât a hard ass â he was sincere, doting, downright admirable. What he dealt with in his years fucked him up horribly to where he didnât trust people easily â but it didnât make him less. He always pushed forward and strove for success, to survive. He wouldnât classify himself as a hero, but he was to you, and he deserved to know. Logan found himself trusting you easily after a year, his lonely nights stuck in his own head turned into game nights with you, strolls through the garden, getting a drink at the bar downtown. He could still be himself, but not have to carry the baggage by himself all the time. Falling hopelessly in love with him was inevitable, but also impossible. Nothing more could happen between the two of you and you knew that â but there was still a flicker of hope in your mind that wouldnât quiet down. Especially with how flirty Logan had become with you.
 Usually, he was like this with Jean and Storm, taking it up a notch with them so he could have the last retort. To say he wasnât a ladiesâ man was a lie, he could pull anyone he wanted to. To Logan it was a game, seeing how flustered he could make him teammates â and he loved to win. With you it was different â it wasnât low growls and light touching on your arms, no, it was more. At first to started off to be resting his chin on your shoulder, letting his breath stroke the column of your neck. Slowly it moved out to touches; Holding your waist from behind, rubbing his large hands over your lower stomach, slipping his hands under your shirt to caress your hip. Over the last few weeks though, he upgraded to holding your face, running his calloused thumb across your bottom lip, stealing forehead and cheek kisses before heading out. Rogue and Kitty that you two were dating, even Bobby got in on it â but when you stated you werenât everyone looked at you like you had six heads.
âNo Logan, I have not.â Hank let his eyes pan to where you were hiding as Logan turned away for a moment, giving you a small wink as he played along. After all, this was his idea â well, his and Xavierâs. You had overheard a conversation about how Loganâs cigar smell had been wafting into their classroomâs lately â distracting everyone as Logan taught. Charles had the bright idea for you to nab them and hold them hostage, until Logan learned his lesson. You on the other hand, were far too gone to do that. Instead you decided to take the cigars, but make a game out of it. Little post it notes with clues on where you were hiding, you stored them all over his bedroom and classroom, thanks to Scott. Ever since Jean told you just how primal Logan could get, how good of a tracker he was, you wanted to test it out for yourself. What better way than take the one thing he cannot live without? âWhat happened this time?â
Logan huffed as he ran both of his hands down his face, coming dangerously close to propping his hip against your body. You had to shuffle slightly as he leaned into the wall, letting his head bounce off the wood a few good times. âLittle shit stole my box of cigars.â He looked exhausted, frustrated, and downright sexy. Seeing how lost and irritable he was without them made you smirk, causing you to bite your lip harder to suppress a whimper. You noticed how Loganâs ear perked up as you gulped, his head turning softly. Hank noticed this almost immediately and replied with a whooping laugh. âHa!â You sighed inaudibly as you silently thanked Hank, knowing he used his booming voice to mask your sounds. Holding one of his hands up to Logan, he snickered as he cleared his throat. âIâm sorry that was cruel of me. What I meant to say is, thatâs funny.â Hank let out a small chortle at Loganâs distain, being met with a flash of a middle finger, and claw too. âThanks, asshole,â Logan huffed as he pushed himself off of the wall, running his hand through his hair.
You watched him intently, thanking whoever was listening for making you have the power of invisibility. Being able to listen to everything going down, while Logan has no idea youâre here, made you feel powerful. You heard talks about how your power could be useful, but ultimately not threatening; Now, youâd beg to differ. Though you grew tiresome of the chase, being a fly on the wall versus a real player. It was fun the first two hours this started, but encroaching on hour six â the school clearing out and the sun almost set on the horizon, you grew slightly bored. âHave you tried the library? She likes to hide there.â Hank let out without hesitancy, making your eyes grow wide. It was like an aha moment for you, choosing the most likely place for last. Earlier it was too crowded, people would know you were there the second Logan came looking for you. But now with the young mutants either outside or in the city due to the upcoming weekend, you knew it would be vacant.
âI know her all too well, Hank. Thatâs the first place I looked.â Hearing Logan say that made your heart flutter, made you feel special that he knew you so well. A strong sigh left your lips as Hank coughed, dreamily staring at Logan as you started to walk backwards. Losing your invisibility for a moment, you stood a few feet behind Logan, walking towards the grand staircase that took you to the library. Waving at Hank, you motioned for it as you smirked, causing Hank to laugh. âYou sure?â He asked, nodding behind Logan. As you stood closer to the staircase, you noticed how Logan was sniffing the air â his body growing tense as he spun around. Itâs when he laid his eyes upon you that you knew he was fed up. It wasnât the primal growl and heavy breathing that got to you, but the way his hazel eyes went from green to black in a split section, his chest heaving as he stared at you. âOh shit,â was all you managed to let out as you turned invisible again, running up the stairs.
Everything was a blur to you, running as fast as your body could take you. Three flights to get where you needed to go seemed like forever, when you were being chased by The Wolverine. He had super human speed, a great nose for sniffing things out, he was at the advantage whilst you were at a disadvantage. Even with scent masking, now that you started to sweat it would make you more obvious, especially when the library was empty. Huffing and puffing as you managed two steps at a time, you refused to look back. But you could hear the stomps of Loganâs boots, clearly taking three steps to match you. Silently you prayed to whoever was listening, to get you to the library safe and sound before Logan got you. The last thing you wanted was for him to pin you to the stairs so everyone could see, that was too on the nose.
Reaching the top step of the library, you managed to sway your way through the wooden chairs and tables, giggling to yourself as you were halfway across the room. Due to the grand nature of the library, especially being two floors, it gave you so many good hiding spots. A circular room to see everything, yet hide in plain sight. As you made it over to the spiral staircase for the second level, you had noticed Logan standing at the entrance of the library, huffing and puffing. It made you snort, seeing how riled up he was. You had to admit, it was sexy to see how pissed off he was, causing a fresh wave of your arousal to coat your panties. Logan seemed to have taken note as he sniffed the air, his eyes cutting across the room straight to yours. âCome on out princess,â he growled, flexing his hands at his side. Slowly you crept up the metal staircase for the second level, taking one step at a time to not elicit any sounds. You let your breathing relax, slowing your heart rate as you kept calm, not needing to give yourself away. But Logan could sense you, eyeing the staircase with every move you made. âI got you now.â
A devilish grin fought to claim his mouth as he pounced over the tables, running on all fours as he landed right at the bottom of the staircase. You managed to get all the way up and around, leaving to the right. Multiple aisles of books covered upstairs, as well as the walls, each window let in the dusk light â showing dust particles roaming the air. Your tell-tale shimmer of invisibility was caught in the light a few times, but Logan was too lost to notice. Finding your perfect hiding spot away from prying eyes, you slotted yourself against the endcap of Psychology of Mutants, knowing no one reads these. You could feel the stagnant beating of your heart at times, wondering if it was due to fear or the thrill of the chase. Maybe it was the aspect of it being bittersweet as well; A years long chase with Logan finally reaching its peak. You knew there would never be going back from this, and that was okay. Stealing his cigars wasnât the endgame, it was only the beginning.
âYou canât hide forever you know,â Logan snarled as he reached the top of the landing, huffing as he eyed every shelf. You could see him, nor did you want to, hoping to God he chose to head left instead of right. Alas you were sorely mistaken as his heavy steps started to echo right, causing you to curse under your breath. SNIKT, you heard the metallic sound echoing through the room, but also your mind, causing you to whimper. Logan had unsheathed his claws, holding them out. The idea of him using the claws on you, pinning you down with them, holding them against your neck made your body run hot, your arousal heightening as the thoughts ran rampant through your mind. âI will catch you.â It was not a threat but a fact, Logan was not kidding anymore. The animal inside of him was taking over, leaving the Logan you knew behind. This was all caused because you pushed him to the point of no return, and you fucking loved it. The reverberation of his claws against the wooden shelves made you shudder, knowing how close he was getting now.
Biting down hard on your lip, you placed your hand over your mouth, trying to regain control of your breathing. Being right across from the last window on the right didnât do you any good, especially with the beam of light falling through. If you moved even a millimeter, you were going to be made. Itâs then when you opened your eyes to pan to your left that you saw his shadow encroaching on you, his stance wide as his claws were pointed at the ground. Each gruff huff he let out made your eyes roll back, finding it harder and harder to keep yourself hidden. You couldnât look away from him either, you needed to watch him; How the sweat beaded at his hairline, how his little tufts of hair were wild from pulling at them, how his snarl got more animalistic the longer he tried to look for you. âWhere did you go?â You couldnât describe how Logan sounded in that moment; Primal and animalistic do not even begin to crest.
You focused too much on his tone, completely forgetting your watchful eye on him. When you glanced back after trying to calm yourself, you noticed the 6â2 Wolverine was no longer walking his way towards the aisles but vanished into thin air. Not knowing where he was, made your heart rate skyrocket â panic ensuing all over your body. Goosebumps arose across your skin as you pondered where he could be, afraid to move in case he was lurking close to you. Maybe he went off to the left instead, leaving you by yourself to escape. It would make sense, considering how you heard the creaking of the floorboards on the opposite side now. Letting out a concealed breath, you slowly moved away from the end cap of the shelf, leaving your back exposed. You knew it was a mistake when the hot, stifling air of the closed space became ice cold, a shiver falling down your spine. The sun shifted away in that moment, blanketing the area in darkness, complete with only a sliver of light, not even to cast shadows. The second your back was exposed; All hell broke loose.
Two strong hands grabbed hold of your hips, pulling you back into a solid form. The yelp you let out was loud enough to echo, but not loud enough to raise suspicion. The strain on your powers had gotten to be too much, slowly slipping back into being visible. You huffed out as your back connected with his chest, your hands finding purchase on his muscular forearms. âThere you are little mouse.â He snickered in your ear, pressing his nose to the pulse point of your neck. Logan deeply inhaled at the vein, his teeth barring to nip at your exposed shoulder. It felt good to have his mouth on you, to have him seemingly obsessed with your scent. After all, it is what gave you away. Whimpering out, you dug your nails into Loganâs arm, feeling the reverberation of his snarl through your body. You couldnât speak, you couldnât move â you were a lost cause. âWhatâs the matter, cat got your tongue?â
Logan was mocking you at this point, purposely being a little shit to mimic how you have been with him. When it came to his cigars, he wasnât fucking around. But when he knew it was you who took them, well he wasnât going to let you live this down. Logan moved from behind you, but kept his hands grasping your flesh. Moving to the side, he pressed your back against the end cap again, bringing you back to your original position. His right hand remained on your hip as his left grasped your neck, pressing against your pulse point, feeling the thrum of blood on your veins. The edges of your vision began to go fuzzy due to the restricted blood flow, but you didnât care. Logan was putting you right in your place, and you were obeying so well for him. âI believe you have something of mine,â he murmured; His prominent nose pressing harshly against your cheek. The warmth of his breath on your skin, mixed with the cold drag of his claws against your skin made you shiver, loving how it felt too much. âI donât know what youâre talking about.â You laughed out, clearly laced with thrill.
Logan didnât take too kindly to you playing dumb, the tick in his jaw spoke measures. His grip on your neck was heavier than before, using his full weight to restrict your blood flow quicker, your vision developing black dots. âOh, you donât?â The challenged in his voice said all you needed to know â he was fucking desperate. There was no hiding it now, he needed you â not his cigars, but you. Gulping down against his large hand, you felt the press of his claws against the back of your neck, pushing through the wood of the bookshelf to lock you in place. He would never intentionally draw blood, or hurt you, but he knew this was your deepest fantasy, all thanks to Jean relaying it. His lips were inches from your ear as he chuckled darkly, groaning out against the flesh. âDo I need to jog your memory?â You shouldnât have been as turned on by that as you were. Your knees buckled slightly as you almost fell, your eyes rolling back into your head.
Logan took advantage of your eyes being closed to pull his hand away from your hip. The loss of touch made you whine, but quickly you were quieted by his roughened tugs. Grabbing at the edge of your tank top, Logan ran his claws through the fabric to create slits, ripping them open just as easily. Looking down at your jeans, he could see the bulge in your pocket â where you had hidden a few of his cigars. A huff of relief fell from his parted lips as she cut your pocket open, letting them fall right into his hand. He mimicked your hiding and shoved them into his own pocket, moving on to the next. The cool breeze against your exposed skin made you quickly heat up; Logan using his claws on you made you lose your fucking mind. He repeated his efforts with your other side, making matching holes in his jeans and shirt, not caring anymore.
It was as the last few cigars rolled out of your pocket that Logan pulled back, his heavy body heat no longer suffocating you. The contact was missed, causing you to pout slightly. âBoo hoo hoo,â Logan mocked as he watched you, walking backwards to push his back against the window. The sill right below it was begging him to sit, so he took advantage of it. Reaching into his left pocket, Logan pulled out his Zippo lighter â flicking it against his pants to ignite the flame. It was intoxicating watching him, how effortlessly fluid his motions were. Biting your cheek, you watched him intently, his eyes never leaving yours. He pulled out the precut cigar from his pocket and pushed it between his lips, favoring his left side for it to rest between his teeth. Lighting the end until the cherry burned bright, he took a few quick puffs, blowing the smoke out in a cloud around him.
Your eyes could not pull away from him even if you tried, it was nearly impossible. The way he moved was like silk through the wind, so effortless and elegant; He knew he was hot like this. Taking another quick drag, Logan let the smoke fall from his lips as he tucked the cigar back in between his teeth, putting away his lighter. Reaching forward with his claws still extended, he hooked two of the blades into the belt loop of your jeans, tugging you forward. There was about a personâs space between the bookshelf and the window, making it easy for him to grab at you. Of course, your body obeyed his silent command, tripping slightly as you tried to regain your footing. Placing both of your hands on his thick, warm thighs, you licked your lips. The smoke being released from both the cigar and his mouth captured your attention, making it difficult to focus on what he was saying. The way his motions flowed were so smooth, it was impossible to say anything else to him.
Taking a rather large drag of his cigar, he puffed his cheeks out a bit to hold it all in. It took you by surprise, why he was holding it all in his mouth. Retracting his claws on his right hand, Logan grabbed at your jaw like a man possessed, pushing his meaty fingertips into your flesh. The slight ache of his possessiveness made your mouth part, a pained look on your face that you were lost in. Logan got close to you, his lips only mere inches away from your mouth as you whimpered. With your lips parted, Logan mimicked your motions as he breathed out. The soft, heady tendrils of smoke wafted from his mouth into yours, causing you to let them stir. Tobacco mixed with the sweetness of the wrap caused your eyes to dilate, boring into Logan with pure unadulterated lust. There was no mistaking it as he shotgunned his cigar with you, his smirk prevalent. âThatâs my good girl.â He crooned, taking in your big eyes, the heat of your skin â basking in your glory.
You blew the smoke right back at Logan while he chuckled, licking his lips to wet them as he took another puff. There was something so intoxicating about how you reacted, it was like watching a painting come to life. From the first day he met you, he knew you were something else â he had to challenge you. Almost four years later and youâre still trying to get with him, he admired it. Finally, the silent love he had for you could be shown, but he wasnât going to make it easy for you. You made him work to catch you, now you had to work to get what you wanted. âGet on your knees.â The command fell off of Loganâs lips so naturally you almost didnât catch it at first. Your eyes glossy as you watched him, your brain not keeping up. Narrowing his eyes at you, he cocked his brow as he laid the cigar to the side, watching to see your reaction. âIâm sorry?â You questioned without realizing, your face slack with lust.
Reaching forward towards you, Logan grabbed your neck once more, this time yanking you so close to his face that you felt his breath waft over your features. âGet. On. Your. Fucking. Knees.â There was no hesitation in Loganâs voice as he stated his command, letting his face go rigid to show he was getting pissed off. âDonât make me repeat myself.â You wanted to, every fiber of your being wanted to disobey him, make him angry so he was rough with you â at the same time you didnât want to make him mad, not yet anyway. Nodding to him against his hand, you slipped down to your knees easily with a moan, pressing out your wet bottom lip as you gazed up at him.
Logan rolled his eyes as he grabbed the cigar again, pressing it against your lips. Itâs when you take a drag of it that he pulls out, putting it in his own mouth once more. With his hand now free from holding his cigar, he quickly flicked open his belt buckle, undoing the top button on his jeans as you took the silent command to pull his zipper down. His erection was stiff against his jeans and left nothing to the imagination. He was big, he was hot, and he was fucking turned on. Watching you with a lustful glow in his eyes, Logan groaned as he watched you, never letting you have the last word: âYou may have started the game princess, but I am going to finish it.â
----
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âI first started noticing the journalists dying on Instagram. I'm a journalist, I'm Arab, and I've reported on war. A big part of my community is other Arab journalists who do the same thing.
And when someone dies, news travels fast. Recently, I pulled up the list that the Committee to Protect Journalists has been keeping and looked at it for the first time. There are 95 journalists and media workers on it as of today.
Almost everyone on it is Palestinian. Scrolling through, I started to get angry. These were the people carrying the burden of documenting this whole war.
Israel is not allowing foreign journalists into Gaza, except on rare occasions with military escorts. These people's names are being buried in a giant list that keeps growing. What I want to do is lift some of them off the list for a moment and give you a glimpse of who they were and the work they made.
I'll start with Sadi Mansour. Sadi was the director of Al-Quds News Network, and he posted a 22-second video on November 18. That was a report from the war, but it also gave me a picture into his marriage.
Sadi's wearing his press vest and looks exhausted. He's explaining that cell service and the Internet keep getting cut off, and it's often impossible to text or call anyone, including his wife. So they've resorted to using handwritten letters to communicate while he's out reporting, sending them back and forth with neighbors or colleagues.
He ends the video with a picture of one of these letters from his wife. In it, she writes,
âMe and the kids stayed up waiting for you until the morning, and you didn't come home. We were really sad.
I kept telling the kids, Look, he's coming. But you didn't show up. May God forgive you.
Come home tomorrow and eat with us. Do you want me to make you kebab or maybe kapse? Bring your friends with you, it's okay.
And give Azeez the battery to charge. What do you think about me sending you handwritten letters with messenger pigeons from now on? Ha ha ha.
I'm just kidding. I want to curse at you, but we're living in a war. Too bad.
Okay, I love you. Bye.â
A few hours after he shared that letter, Sadie and his co-worker Hassouna Saleem were at Sadie's home, when they were killed by an Israeli air strike that hit his house.
His wife and kids, who weren't there, survived.
Gaza is tiny, and the journalist community is really close. Reading the list, you can see all the connections between people. Like with Brahim Lafi.
Brahim was a photojournalist, one of the first journalists to die. He was killed while reporting on October 7. He was just 21, still new to journalism.
On his Instagram, you can see that in his posts just a few years ago, he was still practicing his photography, taking pictures of coffee cups and flowers. Then he started doing beautiful portraits and action shots. You can really feel him starting to become a journalist.
Clicking around on Instagram, I found a tribute post about Brahim from his co-worker Rushdie Sarraj. In this photo, Brahim staring intently at the back of a camera, his face lit up by the light from the viewfinder. He looks so young.
The caption reads, My assistant is gone. Brahim is gone. Rushdie himself was a beloved journalist and filmmaker.
And I know that because he's also on the list. He was killed just two weeks after Brahim. I read the tribute post to him too.
I saw this over and over again. Journalists posting tributes, who were then killed themselves soon after. And a tribute goes up for them.
And then the pattern continues.
Thank you.
Something else I saw over and over on the list, journalists later in the war who had become aware that they could be making their last reports. They'd say it at the beginning of their videos. And those were the hardest to watch, especially when it was true.
One video like that was posted by Ayat Hadduro. Ayat was a freelance journalist and video blogger. Her videos before the war covered a wide range from what I can tell, interviews about women in politics.
She even appeared in a commercial for ketchup-flavored chips. She clearly liked being in front of the camera. Once the war started, Ayat's pivoted to covering bombings and food shortages.
On November 20, she posted a video report from her home. You can hear the airstrikes hitting very close to where she is. It's scary.
âThis is likely my last video. Today, the occupation forces dropped phosphorus bombs on Beit Lahya area and frightening sound bombs. They dropped letters from the sky, ordering everyone to evacuate.
Everyone ran into the streets in the craziest way. No one knows where to go.
But everyone else has evacuated. They don't know where they're going. The situation is so scary.
What's happening is so tough, and may God have mercy on us.â
She was killed later that day.
Targeting journalists, in case you didn't know, is a war crime. So far, the Committee to Protect Journalists has found that three of the journalists on the list were explicitly targeted by the IDF, the Israeli military. Investigations by the Washington Post and Reuters, Human Rights Watch and the United Nations have also raised serious questions in these three cases.
And the Committee to Protect Journalists is investigating 10 other killings. When we reached out to the IDF for comments, they said, quote, the IDF has never, and will never, deliberately target journalists. That's the answer they always give in these situations.
Meanwhile, dozens of seasoned reporters have fled Gaza. Journalists who worked for Al Jazeera, the BBC, the New York Times, the Washington Post, Reuters, Agence France-Presse. So many media offices were demolished in Israeli airstrikes that the Committee to Protect Journalists stopped counting.
It's not just individual lives that have been destroyed. It's an entire infrastructure.
Thank you.
The name on the list that was hardest for me to look at was Issam Abdullah, because I'd crossed paths with him once. Issam was a Lebanese journalist, a video journalist for Reuters for many, many years. He had just won an award for coverage of Ukraine.
I'm Lebanese and still report there sometimes, and I'd worked with Issam a couple of summers ago. He helped me film a sort of random story in Beirut. I was interviewing this entrepreneur who had started a sperm freezing company after an accident where he spilled a tray of hot coffee on his private area, burning himself.
I know, ridiculous. It was a really silly shoot. Right after we said cut and started to rap, Issam started this whole bit about being in his late 30s, reconsidering his own sperm quality and everything he now realized he was doing to hurt it, and no one could stop laughing.
It was a really good day that felt good to remember and to remember him that way. Issam was killed by the IDF on October 13. His death was one of the three that the Committee to Protect Journalists has identified as a targeted killing.
He was fired upon by an Israeli tank while standing in an empty field on the Lebanon-Israel border with a small group of other journalists. Everyone was wearing press vests with cameras out. They were covering the Hezbollah part of this war.
A few other journalists were injured in the attack, which was captured on video. The IDF says they were responding to firing from Hezbollah, not targeting the journalists. But multiple investigations, including by Reuters, the United Nations, Amnesty International and the AFP, found no evidence of any firing from the location of the journalists before the IDF shot at them.
The journalists in the group and video footage confirmed that there was no military activity near them. I had only met Issam once, barely knew him, but it affected me so much when he died. I know that he understood the risks of his job, but somehow it still felt so random and unfair that he would be struck down like that, following the rules, wearing his press vest and helmet, and a pack of reporters on a sunny day in an open field.
I find myself thinking about him all the time. His last Instagram post was commemorating another journalist, this iconic reporter Shereen Abou Aql who had been killed by the IDF. When I first saw that post in October, I thought how ironic because a week later, Isam also was killed by the IDF.
But then, after spending time reading the list, I realized how common this had become. I still haven't finished going through the list and looking up the people on it. I keep finding things that stick with me, like the funny way this one radio host would cut off a caller who was rambling on for too long.
A tweet from reporter Al-Abdallah that quoted Sylvia Plath. It read, What ceremony of wars can patch the havoc? I'm going to keep going down the list, even though this story is over now.
Just for myself. My own way of bearing witness. Which is, in the end, all that these journalists were trying to do.â
âDANA BALLOUT, The 95. Dana sifts through a very long listâthe list of journalists killed in the Israel-Hamas war, and comes back with five small fragments of the lives of the people on it. Dana is a Lebanese-American, Emmy-nominated documentary producer.
#politics#dana ballout#the 95#palestine#israel#war crimes#gaza#committee to protect journalists#đ”đž#brahim lafi#shereen abou aql#issam abdullah#ayat hadduro#rushdie sarraj#hassouna saleem#sadi mansour
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Fuck it, we ball, I hope that disrespectful anon gets hemorrhoids and they can't get them removed until next year, AND that their insurance doesn't cover it. I'm here thinking about your Omega idea where omegas normally do the pursuing, but with a slight twist; the boys being the omegas. An alpha who is for sure down bad for the boys, but thinks "ah, theyre out of my league, I should be aiming lower, manage my expectations". Only 141 is just as down bad for them, and they're doing everything just short of screaming "PICK UP ON THE HINTS, COME INTO OUR HOUSE AND BEDS AND LIVES AND STAY FOREVER PLEASE"
Johnny is about to say fuck decorum and just show up in reader's house wearing nothing but a ribbon and a tag that says 'free to a good home' (your home is the good one, please keep him, there is no receipt so you can't return him).
Price has the brain cell normally in terms of trying to gently coax you into getting you to say you're into them, he has a 15 step plan that may or may not involve using his various contacts to get you spending more time in close proximity to them. Also he for some reason is always baking, he always comes over asking you for sugar? (He'll take any kind of 'sugar' you're willing to offer, he loves making a variety of cream pies)
Gaz is always gently inviting them to attend 'friend' things, things that could be a date but that he can excuse as 'well we're coworkers/friends/neighbors, we should get along :)'. It's just a coincidence that various other people seem to bail except for any of the other boys, now why don't you sit beside him so you guys can share popcorn at the movies (you both always seem to be reaching for it at the same time, if your fingers touched anymore you might as well be holding hands)
Simon is chasing off any omegas he thinks are a threat to them getting reader, that is THEIR alpha, paws OFF (rip to anyone reader was halfheartedly going on dates with, this man is gonna become those people's sleep paralysis demon)
Hope you enjoy!! :3 đđ i lovedddd writing this sm omg
See, the thing is, youâd always thought of yourself as a decent Alpha. Not overbearing, not egotistical, not a demanding freak- just capable and steady. But you werenât extraordinary. Not the kind of Alpha Omegas like them would look at twice. And so, while you worked alongside the men of Task Force 141 you convinced yourself to be content with just admiring them from a distance.
You couldnât help it. They were perfect, as far as you were concerned. Perfect, and fully out of your league.
Surely, Omegas like them would want someone better. Someone stronger. Youâd told yourself that so many times it was practically your mantra, the only way youâd be able to stop yourself from pursuing them. They deserved someone more charismatic, more confident- an Alpha who could match their brilliance. Not someone like you, fumbling through conversations with them, struggling to keep your feelings in check.
But theyâd already decided. They didnât need a flashy Alpha or someone who tried too hard. What they wanted was you. The only problem? You didnât seem to realize it, no matter how obvious they made it.
John took the lead, naturally. He knew you were cautious and perhaps a little insecure when it came to relationships (it was fucking visible in you, silly Alpha. He scoffs each time you draw back, frustrated), so he made it his mission to draw you in- slowly and subtly. His plan was meticulous: get you comfortable, build trust, and create opportunities for you to spend more time with them so youâd see that they only want you.
Maybe then youâd break out of that stupid shell youâve put yourself in.
Heâd started baking regularly, a habit you hadnât even known he had. At least once a week, heâd show up at your place with a tin of cookies, a loaf of fresh bread, or a perfectly golden pie. âThought Iâd share,â heâd say casually, though the slight smirk tugging at his lips told a different story. He peers at you, letting his scent coil just a bit more. âI hope you donât mind the amount of cream. I happen to like cream pies a lot.â
The way to an Alphaâs heart is through their stomach, and all that.
If he wasnât offering you baked goods, he was asking for your help to make said baked goods. âRan out of sugar again,â heâd sigh, handing you an empty container. âMind sparing a bit?â
It was ridiculous, downright unbelievable how often he supposedly ran out of baking supplies. But his visits became a highlight of your week, and the lingering looks he gave you left your heart pounding long after he was gone.
The one time heâd handfed you, watching you lick the syrup from his fingers with half-lidded eyes, still lives in your mind rent-free.
Kyle took a softer, more personal approach. He wasnât above using the pretense of friendship to spend time with you, often inviting you to casual dates- grabbing coffee, going to the movies, or just walking through town and shopping. Every invitation was framed innocently, but there was always a little extra effort behind it. Heâd pick a movie he knew youâd like, suggest places he knew youâd find interesting, and ensure that others you unfortunately knew joined just enough to make it seem less like a date.
Somehow, though, those other people always mysteriously canceled. It was never anything dramatic- just a sudden cold, a scheduling conflict, or a âsomething came up, sorry.â Eventually, it would be just you and a very smug Kyle, sitting close enough that your knees brushed or reaching for popcorn at the same time. Once, right as the bowl emptied and you both reached for it, Kyle simply thought fuck it and held your hand.
On one occasion, you both shared a bowl of spaghetti and ended up with the scene from the Lady and the Tramp.
It was so painfully obvious to everyone.
Except you.
âItâs not a coincidence,â Kyle muttered to Johnny one evening after you left, both of them sitting in the spot you were in, bathing in the leftover warmth and scent. âHow can they not notice?â
Speaking of Johnny; heâs barely keeping himself together. Subtlety in missions are a must sometimes, but he doesnât want to that with you anymore. He was just so, so, so frustrated with your obliviousness. What more does he need to do to show you that he- that they- want you?
Heâs been dropping so many hints; half-jokes about Omegas waiting begging to be swept off their feet, suggestive winks when you compliment him in that lovely, adoring tone of yours. Once, while watching a romantic tv show, heâd sighed loudly and very pointedly said: âIf only someone would claim me.â
âIf ye donât figure it out soon,â he growled at the others one night, pacing back and forth like a wild beast and probably on his way to leave a dent in the carpet, âIâm showinâ up at their doorstep with nothinâ but a red bow, like some bloody Christmas prezzie, I swear to god.â
John sighs, rolling his eyes. âYou do that, and Iâm leaving you on their porch.â
âThatâs exactly what Iâm askinâ for!â
Simon took the quietest but most direct approach. Just not exactly direct towards you. While the others worked to get closer to you, Simon focused on eliminating what he saw as obstacles: other Omegas who thought you were free for the taking. It didnât matter if they were serious or just someone youâd gone on a casual date with- Simon saw them all as threats.
He didnât have to say much to scare them off. A single cold glare from across the room, sharp bursts of his scent, or a low, menacing comment was usually enough to send them packing. He didnât care if it was excessive.
You were his Alpha. You were their Alpha, and no one else had a right to you.
But even Simon softened when it came to you. He couldnât put all his thoughts, all his feelings into words, so he did them with his actions. Quiet protectiveness, gentle, careful touches. Moments of fleeting vulnerabilities shared between you and him.
He was always there for you. Even if you didnât know you need him with you.
Still, despite all their efforts, you remained convinced that they werenât interested.
In the end, to no oneâs surprise, itâs Johnny who snaps. Johnny, so close to his heat, so absolutely done with your obliviousness and the Omegas that arenât them talking with you when you should be only focused on them.
He doesnât care; leaves the carefully made nest with your stolen shirts and none of the others stop him when he just. Drags your surprised self to the nest.
âJohnny! You-â
âI want you.â He hisses, bares his teeth all sharp and desperate. âWe want you. And damn it, we will have you.â
And well, who are you to even say no when this is all you have wanted?
#noona.asks#cod x reader#cod#cod x you#tf 141 x reader#tf 141#tf 141 x you#john price x reader#cod omegaverse#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x you#ghost x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#kyle gaz garrick x you#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gaz x reader#gaz x you#soap x you#soap x reader#johnny soap mctavish x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader#poly!141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly!141#poly 141#call of duty x reader#cod imagines#noona.writes
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#2 Astrology Observations.
"If you live for people's acceptance, you'll die from their rejection." -Lacrae Moore
Saturn, Chiron in the 2H can struggle with insecurities and anxiety, have a low sense of self worth. They can also have financial problems and be prone to sore throats or other neck related problems. These people need to find stability in their dignity and material security, they have to attain self worth & respect through their own efforts rather than seeking validation from external sources. It's like, no matter how many things you buy, anything that is outside of you won't guarantee you more confidence or happiness. There's a fear, restriction, trauma around money, overspending and values (your values physical or not and your dignity).
People with Uranus in the 3H may forget to: think before speak, study, communicate with others like neighbors, siblings or cousins, may forget to be overall more social.
Aquarius Lilith might be reluctant in self expression, might feel ashamed or hesitant in truly being themselves because of past experiences where they might have been ridiculed for their unconventional ideas or way of being, and people being too judgy towards them and that could've scarred them. As a consequence, they could feel like an "alien" and tend to hide being themselves because they might feel shameful of that. For example: Aquarius Lilith in the 3H may be shy or quiet, problems with communication skills, they maybe used to be expressive and social but they were shamed for it so they experienced being silenced and made fun of their interests too, made fun off of their / by their siblings, cousins or neighbors, avoidant of talking too much, insecure when talking or standing up for themselves.
Mercury in Taurus, Scorpio, Pisces and Cancer may have a singer-like voice, fluid voice too for the water signs.
Sun in 8H might have faced trauma related with male figures in your life and also have an absent father, physically or emotionally.
Natives with Libra, Taurus, Venus in the 12H might prefer keeping their relationships and their romantic partners a secret, and keeping secret their self care and healing as well. They can also keep their crushes secret, not even telling to their friends or family. They might also like to gatekeep where they buy their clothes, make-up, skincare products from or just not show off these things. They can also prefer keeping their money, income, financial status a secret and not boast too much about it, their possessions or valuable things. This placement can also mean you often have people who have secretly a crush on you but they'll probably never say it / hardly admit it.
People with Moon, Cancer, Venus, Libra in the 12H, 8H and 6H can be queer, part of LGBTQ.
Moon in Aries people can be impulsive, have a hard time controlling their feelings like they're a volcano, their emotions can be explosive. They're the kind of people to go crazy over the smallest inconvenience.
Mercury in Scorpio or 8H can make natives interested in or like doing research about the occult, dark topics or other taboo things that don't have to necessarily be like the previously mentioned.
Taurus, Libra Risings or Venus in 1H is an indicator of beauty. They can have a very harmonious, symmetrical face.
Capricorn / Saturn in the 12H are karmically protected, as well as natives ruled by Saturn. As a side note, I would beware hurting or messing with people who have Saturn in 6H, 8H and 12H, and again especially those ruled by Saturn at the same time. But usually those who do them wrong are most of the times supposed to learn a lesson, that's Karma.
Venus in Aquarius can dislike it when their admirers are overly obsessive or expressive of their love for them. It can feel uncomfortable for them especially as a first impression.
Moon in the 6H or in Virgo too much overthinking and being overly anxious or emotional that it becomes an actual obstacle hindering them from daily life tasks, stress or too much negativity can manifest as health problems for these people. They could feel so much that they start getting stomachaches, headaches etc.
Saturn in 5H / Leo or 7H / Libra can be either hopeless romantics or just less interested in romance. Their love life can be very dry and not have much of that. Delay in marriage, may happen later on in life.
#astroblr#astro community#astrology community#mutuals#astrology#aquarius lilith#venus#saturn#5th house#7th house#taurus#moon#6th house#12th house#8th house
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Things that happened at Thanksgiving today, but I make it DPxDC
Damian: ⊠Richard? What are you doing?
Dick: *standing on the lawn and staring into the distance* Iâve been watching Danny try and struggle to park for the past fifteen minutes.
Damian: Oh. *also stops to watch* Have you seen Danielle and Jasmine come in?
Dick: Tbh, no. Iâve been watching Danny this entire time. And ohâ oh! He stopped. Ooh, he turned around. Heâs leaving. Damn, he gave up entirely and decided to park on the grass. Oh, he ran over Alfredâs bushes.
Damian:
Dick:
Damian: He wonât make it past the gates without Alfred sniping him.
Dick: Damn, youâre right.
ââââ
Damian: *after Jason did something* what do you think youâre doing, Todd?
Jason: Lol, your mom
Damian: Actually, my mom only used you for her own goals. In fact, your mom abandoned you. Twice.
Jason:
Dick: Now, Damian, thatâs notâ
Damian: People who have had their mothers die in front of them should not speak.
Dick:
Damian: *pointing at Tim* And you! You may have had two parents at one point, but they definitely donât consider you as their child! Thatâs why you had to stay with your neighbors so long! Youâre an inconvenience!
Tim:
Stephanie: Hey nowâ
Damian: I donât even want to hear you. Does your mother know you go out and fight crime? Does she even care?
Stephanie:
Damian: *looking at Cass* You too, Cassandra! But mommy issues wouldnât be the least of your problems with your daddy issues as well!
Cass:
Damian: *turning around to Danny* And I didnât forget about you, Fenton! No wonder you fit right in, your abandonment issues, raging teenage angst, and appearance makes you just at home, doesnât it?!
Danny:
Tim: âŠ. What about Jazz?
Jazz: *whoâs been silent the entire time*
Damian:
Jazz:
Everybody else:
Damian: No, sheâs a guest here. Why would I do that?
ââââ
Dani: Pfftâ Tim, Tim, can Iâ *canât breathe from laughing too hard* can I touch your hair? It just looks so soft! *still laughing*
Tim: �
Jazz and Danny: *also laughing their guts out*
Dani: *tries to reach for Tim but she keeps laughing and canât focus on asking him* Your hair looks so softâ keheheh! C-Can I touch it??
Dani: *eventually swipes her finger under Timâs nose and falls off of her chair from cackling so loud*
Tim: âŠ..
Jason: *also bursting out in laughter* YOUR FACE!! BWAHAHAHAH
*Dani then proceeded to do this four more separate times with other people*
ââââ
Dick: You know how Harley is back together with the Joker?
Dan: Yeah?
Dick: He cheated on Harley again.
Danny: *whirling around, flabbergasted* HUH?!
ââââ
Dick: *carrying several bottles* Alright! Time for alcohol!
Jazz: Uhhh, Dick? Damian is right thereâ
Dick: Heâs getting drunk tonight too!!
Everyone: ????
Damian: Yes! Alcoholism! *takes a plastic cup and takes a big gulp*
Dan: *looking at the bottle* This says sparkling apple cider?
Dick: Shhhh, just watch the show.
ââââ
*dramatic screaming from other room*
Bruce: âŠ.? Whatâs that?
Dick: Is that Jason? He sounds like heâs in pain
Bruce: *standing up* is he okay? Does he need help? Should I go and help him?! Whatâs happeningâ
Tim: Jason is playing ping pong with Dan and Danny. And losing really badly while Jazz is watching.
Bruce:
Dick:
Tim:
Bruce: oh.
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dcxdp#danny phantom x dc#dp x dc crossover#this is all true btw đđđ#paraphrased and embellished for humor and for it to make sense in DPxDC context tho lmaooo#but I promise this 100% happened bc my family is crazy#or maybe I should rephrase and say that the situations that inspired these were 100% true#jazz fenton#danny fenton#damian wayne#jason todd#dani phantom#dani fenton#dan phantom#dan fenton#dick grayson#tim drake#stephanie brown#cassandra wayne#cassandra cain#phantom family#some anger management heheh#incorrect quotes#thanksgiving
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