#I also just in general love acting music and writing!!
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YES THE SEX THING !!! it bothers me so much but i see it less so i didn't mention it. but like jazz is friendly and charismatic and his whole thing is music, so i feel like people have this idea in their head that those traits automatically = a nymphomaniac or something.
which would be fine on its own as a standalone context but in context for jazz-it does become an issue because of the connotations of a black coded character being written that way.
especially since jazz has not been depicted like that in any media that has him in it (as far as im aware) so it's an authors personal choice to add this in there for essentially the reason of...? why?
its NOT a jazz character trait. as far as i've seen anyway as i haven't seen every jazz character ever written but i also feel like if he was intended to be seen like that, they'd have no problem doing that. other characters have been written to be like that-there's jokes about certain characters flirting with earth cars and stuff. i mean knock out's entire vibe is tf prime is something like that with his voice, he canonized interface as a cybertronian word for sex, borderline flirting with starscream, etc...
where the nuance comes in here is that there's nothing wrong with a headcanon. and people can headcanon jazz to be like that. and theres nothing inherently wrong with being a flirt and liking sex, whatever.
it just becomes odd that this trait ive only ever seen be added to jazz and never anyone else. and the way its written 50% of the time is completely the 'black guy with a big dick he loves to swing around' stereotype that makes me click off.
(i read one where because jazz is a spy its mentioned he's had to rape people for interrogation purposes before and i immediately clicked off because what the hell are you talking about ???? it felt completely out of place. i guess you could write a story in which that happens-i've got zero issues with dark fic.
but using jazz of all people? i didn't like that. i know jazz is a spy and he's done bad shit before but i just couldn't believe in that.
its the whole 'he wouldn't fucking say that' thing. because people can do whatever they want (all i'm asking is to be a little more socially aware of stereotyping) but ultimately when you're writing fic and you want it to be in character you have to write a set of circumstances that would make a character actually say that. throwing it into a fic that is ultimately the same universe with the same circumstances just slightly tweaked is not enough of a circumstance to make me believe that he would do that to interrogate people. its bad out of character writing. but this is a tangent)
this is getting long (sorry!) but basically yes the "jazz is a beast in the sheets and needs sex 24/7 and we'll talk about every type of past relationship he's ever had and also did you know he's had sex with EVERYONE on the ark" is something that i find so distasteful. because its not jazz.
when i read the idw comics and saw jazz i did not see what these writers were seeing. and it feels like a purposeful choice to see him like that versus the guy he actually is. im not an expert but he's just a charming musician who's pretty laid back and uses that as an advantage for a spy stuff sometimes.
i don't think it's really an act that he's a generally nice dude who just also has the whole "i got to do what needs to be done thing prowl has" but he actually does feel guilt (which is why i don't think he would ever take an interrogation far enough to rape somebody jesus christ) and he does let emotion get in the way like when he killed that guy on earth.
its feels off putting to turn the guy i described above into the type of guy that would:
- continue to flirt with prowl after being rejected over and over again (comes up a lot in jazzprowl)
-disrespect boundaries/be sexually aggressive in general
-talk about sex all the time even when inappropriate
-run off to jerk off or have inappropriately timed sex
all things ive seen across various different fics. and if you want to write jazz that way you better create a set of circumstances that makes me believe it. because throwing it into tf animated of all continuities (as an example) just make me immediately side eye your priorities
tldr; the jazz sex fiend trend does bother me. i don't think writing him that way or enjoying him written that way automatically makes you racist. but i do encourage people to explore any subconscious bias they may have because that trait doesn't make sense for jazz. especially if you want to write in character jazz fics.
in the spirit of honesty...the way some of yall write jazz in transformers fanfic is honestly appalling. it screams ive never met a black person in my life. it screams i watched michael bays 2007 transformers and took notes, as if the bayverse hasnt been criticized for its terrible stereotyping.
yes, he has an accent. yes, he uses slang. but jesus christ. his usage is not as egregious as yall write it. yall write him like hes stupid and uneducated. the ultimate caricature of a black man. its super insulting.
and i get that he's not actually black due to not being human but he is black coded and the treatment is abysmal at times.
my advice? JUST WRITE DIALOGUE. our brains do the rest. i know what he sounds like, i can fill it in myself.
stop writing "ay, ya sure ya got shit handled, fam'? bro, i 'aint no fool, i gots that dog n' me."
ESPECIALLY BC JAZZ HAS NEVER. SPOKEN LIKE THAT ANYWAY.
sincerely, a (very) frustrated black person.
#also i will be looking at those recs thank you very much#this got SO LONG im sorry#jazz#tf jazz#transformers#maccadam
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*Gasp,* I’m making an ISAT Musical? (just read the post skjdksjdk)
Look at This Post and @isatthemusical for new information!
So, I’ve considered the isat musical idea, and have decided I’m going to try and gather a bunch of sillies to SING AND HELP WRITE THE SONGS!!!! but in the mean time, here’s the general idea for each Act! I wouldn’t call them song names, but they are the temporary names so that I can remember what parts of the game go to which song
(All of those under cut, plus IMPORTANT NOTES AT THE BOTTOM)
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(Opening)
Again and Again and Again
(And since I’m going to make this one, for a little bit of an idea of what that MIGHT sound like (because I just started making these and plans may change as I compose each piece) is I’m thinking a melody based on the death theme at the beginning that transitions into a sort of 3/4 waltz version of the game’s title screen theme!)
(Act 1)
The Saviors of Vaugarde!
Our Journey So Far
Rock and Roll
(Act 2)
Welcome to the Show!
How can I Help You, Stardust?
En Haut, En Haut, En Haut!
Intermission
Give Me a Call!
Curtains
Encore!!!
(Act 3)
Again.
The Enemy
You’re Not The Star!
Say It… Say It… Say It…!
We Don’t Have To Fight Anymore.
Memory of Memories
(This, to be adapted to a musical, will have to be an odd, in-between combination of Acts 3 and 4 to include both Bonnie’s death and friend quests)
(Friend quests)
What it Means to Protect
Disconnect
Where we Were, What we’ve Become
Who You Want to Be
Our Family
In This Moment…
(Act 4ish)
Back To The Stage.
Let’s Hang, Stardust!
The Island.
Wish.
You’ll Be Going Back!!!
(Act 5)
Above All Else.
Just Trying to Help!!!
My Home
Labyrinth
You’ve Been Through This Before.
Power of Love
I Won’t Let You Go Home!
Tell Us, Tell Us, Tell Us!!!
(Act 6)
Our Journeys To Come
Familytale
How can You Help Me?
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IMPORTANT THINGIES??:
I WILL MAKE A DISCORD SERVER SOON!!!
THERE IS A POLL ON MY BLOG ABOUT CHOOSING A ROLE!!!
ALSO, I AM NOT PROFESSIONAL BY ANY MEANS!!!
ALSO ALSO!!! If you have any recommendations or like, parts of the game you think I should include (whether I have them already planned or not because this post doesn’t show everything) because YES!!! Any part(s) of the game or symbolism or ANYTHING you think would be good to include, I’d super appreciate a reblog or comment with it :3
And again these are just temporary names, I’d call them more “reminders” than anything, so yeah! I’ll probably start with trying to write the opening song, which is the first scene in the game where Loop makes that silly second wish.
#The ‘’Rock and Roll’’ one made me giggle#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat loop#sasasaap#sasasaap spoilers#esoogthegoose#Isat musical esoogthegoose
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Tell me a bit about yourself mr.boo or do you prefer mx.boo?
Hihi!! Both are wonderful though I have a preference towards Mr- though a;dflk also seems wild to ever call myself anything with an honorific, Boo in general is lovely! Wellll I've had tumblr for awhile but have never been too active, something I recently have been trying to do more of! Currently and for the last three years I've been obsessed with Dnd and have devoted all my passions to creating far too complex Dnd characters that will likely never be played aas;dflkj as well as currently playing in two campaigns at the moment though, I listen to a lot of dnd podcasts! Mostly just roll with it and any kind of dimension 20 campaign. I also enjoy the magnus archives! recently started listening to it because my first played character, Leon Rothman, is apparently so similar to the protagonist of the magnus archives that I've been told on multiple separate occasions how shocking it is I havent listened or read it by how accidentally similar the two characters are- recently have checked it out to see how true it is and the podcast is WONDERFUL and i cant help but be inspired for dnd as well from it, the horrors are truly Inspiring✨ ANYWAYS Ive rambled far too much haha this is my first ask!! Absolutely thrilled to respond to any and i have many plans to be more active here, though that activeness will likely be random dnd ramblings or amateur art shared
#PROBABLY RAMBLED TOO MUCH IN THIS A;LSKFD#my only excuse is that#i am#excitable#truly not much of an excuse but#WOO WORDS#INTERACTING#WOOOOOOOOO#Giant dnd nerd here#I also just in general love acting music and writing!!
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seeing u slowly become a taylor swift hater is the biggest character development in the history of this planet not going to lie to you fam
😭😭😭😭 thank you ig
#asks#anon#not gonna lie to you fam i appreciate you sending this ask but also please do not describe me as a tswift hater#i used to love her at some point. as you probably know but i have deeply moved on from her i feel#like her songs are nice but they are just. not something i would typically enjoy anymore#and also despite having swiftie mutuals even if i enjoyed her music i would strongly detach myself from the fanbase#not on tumblr not really just in general. fans theyre so invasive and give me the ick especially thr hardcore ones#and her music is deep if u read into the lyrics and she does know how to write a song but also. this online thing where people worship her#is um. in bad taste like a while back on pinterest i saw a meme which went “listening to these artists is indie cottagecore lesbian culture#and instead of like clairo who you would expect somehwere in that list. she was there#bitch you mesn the world no.2 singer after the weeknd??? swifties online are insane#i do disagree with her on quite some points also like her political silence and environment and i can admire her as a singer songwriter#but its like how far can you go. you have the influence. she did that equality act petition in 2019 so we can see that#i would not call her overrated as i believe her music is generally fine but its not revolutionary by any means#she didnt bring anything new and unheard of to the pop genre except like wiping your insta page before a release#this was completely unneccesary sorry. but yeah i wouldnt call myself a hater but i dont like her much either#this was completely unwarranted you dont need to read this
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The Vourdalak 4/5 🌟
•hazy, dreamlike and sort of theatrically campy
•atmosphere reminds me of some of my favorite 70’s fairytale movies
•visually a very pretty movie
•it’s low key silly and at the same time not silly at all
•protagonist belongs in horny jail
•had to have too much of a close look at his butt, automatic star deduction
•piotr my beloved
•is this truly a four star watch? Idk man but I do indeed have a newfound obsession with piotr as a character
SPOILER ALERT PROCEED WITH CAUTION
•would be mad about kill your queers™️ but tbh everyone gets murked
•sdenka going off to munch on some noble frenchmen is not a bad ending tbh
•justice for piotr, they too deserved to gnaw on some nobles
(I do wonder if not escaping while being undead is maybe also meant as a sort of kinder fate? Since vampirism in this movie seems to be a metaphor for generational trauma and grief. But like, as a gay I naturally wanted to see piotr have a happy ending, idk the urge to write fanfic about the siblings escaping as vampires and terrorizing the french court is strong)
Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) 3,5/5🌟
•It’s a very pretty movie, mostly watched it bc I like looking at Isabelle Adjani’s face
•that shot where she runs through the plague infested city and people have their last meals is stunning and I love it immensely (some shots looked like a vanitas painting and I appreciate that very much)
•got a little bored about 2/3rds in and I hate Klaus Kinsky, that’s why the rating isn’t higher
•that being said Orlok is specially pathetic and whimpery in this one and I did like that lmao
•he is like a sad cat left outside in the rain
•everyone has a german accent and the acting us very campy, nearly boosted this to four stars bc I loved how unintentionally comedic it was
•I was yesterday years old when I found out that this movie apparently has two versions??? One in english and one in german??? I must watch the german version now to see if it’s very different
•could have been gayer
Nosferatu (1922) 4/5🌟
•a classic
•love me some dracula silent film fanfic
•watched this with a friend last summer and laughed my ass off bc we kept doing silly little voices and sound effects to read the title cards aloud 10/10 would recommend
•low key started my obsession with silent films
•watched it again two weeks ago in cinema with a musician playing live synth music to it and it was absolutely insane,, I fell in love with it all over again
•I know we all know the classic shot of his shadow going up the stairs and it’s iconic for a reason but can we talk about that scene where orlok’s hand creeps up ellen’s body and closes around her heart?? It’s probably my all time favorite ever
•one thing I didn’t like was how orlok sometimes just looked like he was walking around in the sunshine, I used to think oh let it be it was made in the 1920’s but other murnau movies handled night time scenes SO much better
•that being said this movie is insane when u consider it was made in a time where being a director was basically just fucking around and finding out (as in the classic conventions of cinematography were not yet established)
•orlok is a silly little goober and so is Knock, they’re cute little grandpas (perhaps with some weird hobbies) and I want to adopt them and lovingly feed them flies in a terrarium
•in summary, insane movie, everyone who loves vampires should watch it NOW
Vampire movies I have been watching to keep me sane until season 3 of iwtv (part 3)
Next up are the achillean (or vaguely homoerotic) vampire movies
The Lost Boys (1987) 4/5🌟
•Very fun, very 80’s
•characters with a lot of potential (can see myself writing mental fanfic about this one)
•cool visuals& lots of pretty, long haired men in cunty little outfits
•if you liked the whole stranger things pre teens on bikes solving mysteries thing you’ll love this
•if you liked the vampiric motorcycle coven aspect of s2 of iwtv you’ll love this as well
•it’s a cult classic for a reason but I personally hated the ending
•should’ve been gayer but also it’s very homoerotic
Dracula (1931) 3/5🌟
•really beautiful& atmospheric set design
•loved the costumes, specially for dracula’s brides
•Bela Lugosi’s so pretty 😭
Like genuinely no wonder the man has a whole bauhaus song about him
•They told Bela Lugosi “serve count” and he understood “serve cunt” instead
•did not go into much depth with the characters imo and was kinda xenophobic (but I guess that last point is to be expected given the source material and the time the movie was made)
•obviously ended up rooting for hot dracula (lmfao surprise) specially bc all the human characters were so boring
•could’ve been more homoerotic
•not my favorite vampire movie but would definitely watch it again bc it’s just fun
Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) 3/5 🌟
•pls don’t crucify me over the rating I know this one’s beloved by many it just wasn’t for me
•5/5🌟 for costume and set design though like the movie is heavenly to look at
•a little too long and convoluted tbh I did feel a bit bored at times with the story
•didn’t really buy the romance between any of the characters
•another VERY hot dracula like I’m a certified man hater and yet I was simping hard
•homoerotic beard shaving scene
•fantastic blood sucking scene single-handedly made my rating go up from 2,5 to 3 stars lol
Interview with the Vampire (1994) 3,5/5🌟
•pls don’t crucify me over this rating either I just didn’t feel like I enjoyed myself as much as I should’ve throughout this movie
•this is one of those pieces of media that’s both gay and homophobic at the same time, like Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt are no homo-ing all over the place
•made think Tom Cruise in a blonde wig is attractive and I’ll never forgive them for that
•it’s kind of amazing seeing Kirsten Dunst act circles around two grown men
•despite me being very critical I actually do like this movie a lot I just also think it doesn’t do the characters and their complexity justice
•very pretty set design and costuming, visually this movie is gorgeous
#vampire movies i have been watching to keep me sane until season 3 of iwtv#iwtv#interview with the vampire#the vourdalak#nosferatu#nosferatu 1922#nosferatu 1979#the lost boys#vampire movies#vampires
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cultivating your hobbies to become that girl
as summer starts to end, i find my days a little emptier and im full of anticipation for the coming academic year. but the last thing i want to do is waste the last part of summer so now is the perfect time to cultivate or begin a new hobby, focusing on four areas to level up your body, skills, mind and passions! enjoy angels and i hope this gives you some inspiration.
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body
having a hobby that helps you reach your dream body, maintain a healthy lifestyle or just help with your mental health (as moving your body always does!) is such a good idea. the past few months my workout schedule has decreased due to the amount of schoolwork i have had and exam season so now is the perfect time for me to get more disciplined and build up a good workout scheme. my hobbies based around my body are pilates or yoga, both of which help me with my fitness goals. here are some more ideas/inspiration for some hobbies you could start:
‘hot girl walks’ - set a goal for your daily steps and go on walks everyday to help you achieve that.
running daily.
swimming daily.
tennis or badminton daily.
joining a sports club such as football or gymnastics.
dance - could be by yourself at home following dance workouts!
strength training.
starting a fitness challenge - such as a month long youtube challenge.
start making your own fitness content! film videos or write tutorials.
bike riding daily.
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skills
finding a hobby that helps you develop/cultivate your skills is so important. mine personally is cooking/baking as it helps me focus on giving my body what it needs, becoming more independent and providing for those i love. here are some ideas/inspiration:
painting.
making your own clothes - sewing, knitting or crocheting.
gardening.
scrapbooking.
photography.
drawing.
writing - poetry, novels, articles or anything similar.
acting - helps with public speaking, confidence and making friends.
jewellery making.
chess or a similar intense mental game - cultivates your thinking skills and mind.
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mind
finding a hobby that helps you mentally, especially if relevant to schoolwork or career plans is so helpful. mine is reading/engaging with literature as not only does it align with my academic work but also helps me with how i think, view the world and allows me to be more empathetic.
mindfulness/meditation.
learning to play an instrument.
writing/researching around your subjects.
budgeting - good way of keeping track of and understanding money even if you aren’t planning on doing anything economics based!
journalling or keeping a diary.
joining/starting a book club.
starting a studyblr, study youtube channel etc.
learning a new language.
tutoring someone - great way of helping yourself learn as well!
joining a debate team.
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passions
finding a hobby around one of your passions is such a fun and unique way of engaging in things you enjoy. mine personally is visiting museums/areas of historical importance as i am so passionate about history.
visiting art galleries.
attending the theatre/cinema.
going to live music events.
visiting libraries/book shops - growing your wish list, finding new book inspo etc!
going to cooking classes, restaurants or cafes.
travelling to new areas (could be local or international) - perhaps to develop language skills, find places to hike etc.
attending lectures on subjects youre interested in.
watching documentaries or video essays.
starting a new course - i do several history courses, my most recent was on European empires!
making a blog, channel, instagram etc for a new hobby or interest.
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────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ────────୨ৎ─────── thank you for reading angels! hopefully this will help us all on our hobby journeys and have given you ideas of hobbies to try or develop for the end of summer or just in general! love, m.
#becoming that girl#it girl energy#clean girl#girlblogging#girlhood#glow up#it girl#just girly things#pink pilates princess#pink aesthetic#pink blog#tumblr girls#cute#this is a girlblog#that girl
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get to work.
LN x leclerc!reader
a sequel of sorts to as sick as it sounds, i loved you first - part 1 - part 2
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in which lando starts the life with you that he’s always wanted
hi! me again - obsessed with these two soooo much so best believe i had to write (and will continue to write) more for them! thank you so much for continuing to read my work, ilysm and also huuuuuge shoutout to my brainrot bestie @lavenderlando because i truly could not do any of this without her xoxox lemme know what you think, likes and reblogs are aaaalways so so appreciated!
warnings: 18+!! minors dni!!! this one is kinda filthy hehe. smut, fluff, highkey breeding kink, brief switch!lando and switch!r, unprotected p in v, general sex acts in silly places, charles still having it out for lando lmao, mentions of pregnancy/family planning
7.2k words
you stare up at him, breathless, awestruck, leaning further into his touch. he’s swaying you gently to the music, ignorant to all the eyes of your nearest and dearest family and friends. fairy lights cast a warm hue over his face, leaving him golden and sparkling, gleaming with his love for you.
lando’s still pristine, suit unwrinkled, dress shirt crisp, tie straight, not yet wrecked by the party that will undoubtedly overflow all around you both as the night progresses. your dress flows out around you, fanning out in intricate layers of sharp white lace. your newly acquired wedding bands feel foreign on your fingers, but perfect nonetheless. you’re more used to it than him, though, having hauled around the giant rock of an engagement ring he’d presented you with just a few months before.
martin had been called on to be a groomsman, but he’d vouched for the DJ who’s inviting the rest of the party to join you and your husband on the dance floor. people swirl all around you, blowing kisses, squeezing your arms affectionately, but lando can’t keep his eyes off of you.
your husband.
your husband your husband your husband.
it felt just as delicious to think of him with that title as it is to say it. you say it anyway.
“my husband.” you hum, content, pressing your head to his chest, looking up at him through your eyelashes.
“my wife.” he coos down at you, pressing a lasting kiss to your hairline, cautious not to mess up your carefully crafted hair.
but it’s your wedding night, and you want to kiss him properly! you figure you’ve earned the right to kiss him anywhere, anytime, whenever, so you tilt your head back and drop his hands, pulling him down. his hands find your cheeks, cupping them ever so softly as your lips meet, loving and tender. you smile into it, and he mirrors you.
“can’t wait for everything.” you sigh, blissed out from the adoration rolling off of him in waves.
“everything?” he laughs, forehead resting on yours.
“life, with you. always.”
“i’ll give you everything you want, baby.” he promises.
you wholeheartedly believe him.
-
“better make this quick, norris.” you giggle, backing up towards the marble counter.
lando stalks towards you, grinning hungrily, and hoists you up onto the sink top, making sure not to damage your dress - not that it would be the first time he’d ruined a white dress of yours. wasn’t that how you’d both ended up here, anyway?
“sue me for wanting to fuck my wife, norris.” he mocks, mouthing at the skin of your neck. you flush. mrs norris.
“no marks.” you breathe, trying to convey a tone of warning, but it comes out needy and weak, and would have fallen on deaf ears regardless.
“but you’re all mine now, honey. forever.” lando murmurs against your jaw, and your head falls back to let him run ruin across your delicate skin. “want everyone to know it.”
you don’t protest again, spreading your legs as he ruches the material of your dress so that it bunches around your hips. his hand skates below the material, blindly feeling the satin and lace of your panties. he groans as he traces over a damp patch, sinking his teeth into the junction between your neck and your shoulder.
“soaked for me, baby. been wanting me? just had to ask.” he rambles, tugging your underwear to the side. “can have my cock whenever you want it, you know? it’s all yours.”
lando smears your wetness around with a swipe of his thumb, switching rapidly between messy circles around your clit and teasing dips into your cunt, shallow enough to make you squirm for more.
“just fuck me.” you pant, rutting your hips into his hand.
“the mouth on you, baby. filthy.” he scolds teasingly, but adheres, belt clinking and slacks dropping just enough to free himself.
he drags your hips even closer to the edge of the counter and you feel the warmth of him, hot and throbbing, ghosting over the seam of your pussy. you feel the tip of him press firmly against where you’re leaking, and a roll of his hips sheathes him deep into you smoothly.
“shit, we don’t have a condom.” his eyes fly open, finding yours. you just smirk up at him.
an earnest and vulnerable conversation in the weeks leading up to your wedding had you deciding to abandon your birth control, but you’d been using condoms ever since, not wanting any accidents in the run up to your nuptials.
“you said you wanted to get to work once we got married.” you clench around him for dramatic affect. your desire for flair makes sweat bead in his hairline. “so get to work.” you bite your lip, gazing up at him through lustful, hooded eyes.
“you’re gonna kill me, i swear.” he growls, finding a wild rhythm that makes you writhe into him.
slaps of skin echo through the bathroom, whines and cries of satisfaction and his name bouncing between the cream walls. he can’t take his eyes off of you, beautiful and spent beneath him, rutting your hips to meet his.
“i love you, lando, love you like this, mon amour.” you whimper, clinging to him. his shirt hangs wrinkled, tie loose and brushing against the skin of your chest that your dress doesn’t cover.
“i love you, too, baby. so fucking perfect for me.” lando groans, pressing a messy, open mouthed kiss to your lips. it’s all tongue and teeth, raw desire as you lick into each other. “you want me to put a baby in you already, huh? ready for me to fuck you nice and full and we’ve only be married, what, six hours?” he taunts.
“i want it, please.” you beg, softening your eyes and pouting your lips.
“my wife is such a needy slut for me, yeah, baby? gonna make me a daddy?”
a few more thrusts, and you’re undone, coating him as he stutters, fills you up. you pant into the intimate space between you both, satiated as you giggle, kiss him. you rake your hands through his sweat slicked locks, holding him close.
“we better get back.” he whispers.
“you’re dripping down my thigh.” you deadpan and he cackles, neck flexing as it does. you lick your lips subconsciously, anxious to mark the taut, tanned skin up when you have him all to yourself again.
“don’t worry, honey, i’ll clean it all up later.” he winks, and you slap his shoulder.
and when you’re curled into his side, cry laughing at max’s speech, recounting the unhinged DM you’d sent him once upon a time in qatar, you work overtime to keep your thighs clenched tight.
-
it’s 3am when you finally reach the villa, tucked away somewhere in sardinia, secluded and gorgeous. you creep around exploring while he drops your bags in the master suite, finding yourself on the back deck. from there, you can see the garden, green and ornate, bursting with flowers in shades of pinks and white. then, there’s the sea, waves crashing softly onto the white sand of your private beach. the privacy stretches on for miles in both directions, faint lights far away down the coastline.
you sigh, content, tears pricking your eyes. lando had picked this out, just for you, and his choices made it clear just how well he knows you. that’s how he finds you, wiping a stray tear, and he wraps you in his arms, his head perching on your shoulder. he breathes you in, and you feel him smile against the skin of your neck. open mouthed kisses are dotted over your shoulder and you relax fully into him, eyes fluttering shut.
“it’s so gorgeous, amour. thank you so much.” you whisper, turning your head and awaiting a kiss that quickly comes.
“don’t thank me, baby. this is the least you deserve.” he murmurs, resuming a soft suckle at your neck. you roll your eyes at his generosity. he’s so selfless sometimes that he forgets that he deserves this every bit as much as he thinks you do.
“can we go down to the shore? i’m too excited to sleep.” you giggle, and he hums into the hickey he’s leaving.
“course, honey. we have plenty of time to sleep.”
the plan was, after all, to eat, sleep, fuck, repeat. and swim, of course.
you walk down to the water hand in hand, taking your time through the gardens. he picks you a flower, tucks it sweetly behind your ear.
you ditch your shoes, sighing as your feet sink into the cool sand, damp from the push and pull of the waves. the stars are out, clear as day, and you play dot to dot, pointing out constellations to lando.
“do you have any idea how happy i am?” lando asks when you’re both sat in the sand. he pulls you into his side, your head tucking below his chin.
“if you’re as happy as i am then i’d guess pretty fucking happy.” you reply.
“the wedding was… god. i was kinda nervous about the whole event but as soon as i saw you walking down that aisle…” he trails off, scoffing in disbelief. “you’re a fucking angel.”
“i wasn’t even sure that charles was gonna let me go, you know?” you chuckle, gazing up into his watery eyes.
“i did have to pry him off.” lando laughs along with you, shaking his head.
“and then his speech.” you slap a hand over your mouth, stifling laughter. lando throws his head back in faux agony.
the speech in question had started with “to my sweet, dear baby sister and… lando”, and had ended with “and if you choose, for whatever reason, to make her unhappy, they will never find your body.”
“don’t think he’s ever gonna like me.” lando shrugs, tightening his arm around you, like someone might come and take you away.
“oh, shut up, he likes you! he just… likes to torture you more.” you grin cheekily up at him, and he can’t help but lean down and kiss you urgently.
“you are so beautiful.” he mumbles against your lips. “‘m so fucking in love with you.”
“je t’aime pour toujours.” you coo, licking into his mouth. i love you forever.
something urgent and guttural sounds from deep within him and you smooth your hands through his hair. he pulls away breathless, something wild in his eyes.
“we never talked about what happened in the bathroom.” lando rasps, eyes darkening.
“we got to work.” you smirk, echoing your previous words.
“but last time we spoke about it, you weren’t one hundred percent sure about the timing.” lando furrows his eyebrows, searching your face. your smirk relaxes into a smile, genuine with excitement.
“as soon as we said our vows, i knew i was ready. those things you said about family, about us having our own family… god, lando i would have let you have me right there at the alter.”
you are the light of my life. you make me happier than i ever thought i could be, and i will spend every day trying to make you feel the same way. from the moment i saw you, i was yours and i’ll stay yours until my last breath. my greatest joy so far is getting you call you my wife, and i can’t wait to call you the mother of my children. there’s no one else on this earth that i’d want to live my life with, raise a family with, come home to. you make me whole, baby.
safe to say, you’d said your own vows through a chorus of sobs.
“are you sure you’re ready?” lando whispers.
“i want a family with you, amour. let’s make one.” you raise an eyebrow, an invitation.
“i say we start right here.” lando beams, lunging towards you.
you fall back into the sand, laughing against his lips as he kisses you deeply, mouthing down your jaw. he wastes very little time, pulling at the strap of your camisole, licking over your bare flesh as he drags it down your arm.
“here? in the sand?”
“i said what i said.”
he peels off your top, nips at your bare chest as he pushes your sweats down, just enough to get his hand beneath your panties. you gasp wetly, eyes fluttering shut as he teases your folds with his fingers. he moans into the skin of your breast, hardening at the pooling wetness he’s discovered. a few calculated swipes of his fingers and he’s sinking them deep, your sweat pants restricting his movements. he adapts, rutting his fingers into you in a slow grind, thumb bumping your clit. your nipples peak, the ocean breeze and the cold sand under your back causing you to arch violently into him.
“you’re so wet for me, baby.” lando pants, before he closes his lips around your breast, swirling his tongue around your nipple. you’re sensitive, clenching around his fingers.
“want you inside of me.” you whine, bucking your hips to meet each grind of his digits.
“i am.” he flashes you a devilish grin, punctuating his words with a harder thrust.
“lando!” you growl, warning him.
“anything for my wife.”
he pulls his fingers out of you, the sound of the action obscene, and makes a show of sucking them clean while he strips himself bare. you huff, wriggling your sweats off so that you’re naked too, your thighs falling open on cue. he settles between them, brushing your hair out of your face as he settles on top of you.
you can feel him, throbbing and hot between your legs, small drops of him hitting your bare cunt. you keen into him, rolling your hips up to meet his.
“now, baby, please.” you beg.
“never get used to this, you know?” landos chest heaves as he pushes into you. “always feels as good as the first time.”
he sinks all the way in, taking note of every minuscule movement of your face. his breathing stutters at the warmth and wetness that envelops him whole, his tummy tight. you’re no better, lip caught between your teeth as you watch him hungrily.
“you remember our first time, baby? how good we were together, even then?” lando rasps, pulling out of you the tiniest bit, just to slam his hips right back against yours. it makes electricity shoot up your spine to the top of your head, leaving you hot all over.
“of course, amour, i think about it all the time.” you breathe, eyes rolling back as he sets his pace, slow yet so deliciously brutal.
“did you think then that we’d be doing this forever? that you’d be all mine, begging me to get you pregnant?” he teases, fingers digging into the plush of your hips.
“i used to think about it then, if we’d make it. knew we would. wanted you forever from the very first time.” you choke out, meaning it. “‘m so fucking happy lando.” you gasp, grabbing at every part of him that you can.
your hands smooth over his bronze skin, bound to get even richer from all of the sun kisses the rest of your honeymoon would bring. you zone out, honing in on the sound of the waves dancing against the shoreline, eyes staring up at the moon just behind his head. you can’t believe that you’re his, here, that this is real life and that you share a last name with a man that glows like the sun. a head of chocolate frosted curls obscures your vision, and you realise that you’re crying.
“baby? you with me?” lando draws you back to him, hips still.
“i’m here, ‘m sorry, it’s perfect. you’re so perfect.”
you pull him down, so desperate to taste him, moans muffled. your tears trail down his cheeks as well, so close and intertwined. he’s gentler now, pawing at your sides attentively, pulling your body along with his.
“gonna give you everything you want, pretty girl. my beautiful, beautiful girl.” lando coos.
“come with me.” you plead, nerve endings set alight by the overstimulating way his cock drags against your walls.
“you gonna take it all for me, mama?” and your vision goes white. he’s evil for that, playing you like a fool, but it makes you quiver around him, thighs shaking where they’re locked around his waist.
you chant his name, blasphemy, and words of absolute adoration as you let go, coating him in waves of your very own creation. he tries his best to ride through it, but one look at your twisted face, of your quaking body, and he’s dumb with pleasure, crashing down on top of you like a heated blanket.
the sun rises in the east when he carries you to bed, your eyes drooping as you loop your arms around his neck.
“get some sleep for me, angel. we have a baby to make.”
-
“do you ever wonder about trying new things?” lando asks, hand linked loosely with yours.
sea water rushes over your feet up to your ankles, the sun warming the skin of your backs as you stroll lazily along the coastline. it’s been three days of nothing but each other, a big, peaceful house and endless sunshine.
you sigh, rolling your eyes.
“lando, for the fourteenth fucking time, i promise i’ll play tarkov with you when we get home, but it’s just not really my thing-“ you whine, but his louder than life laugh cuts you off, slicing through the serenity of the beach.
“not what i meant, baby.” he chuckles, utterly fond of the way your face wrinkles with confusion.
“what, then?”
“in the bedroom.” lando smirks, and your eyes go wide.
“like… like what?” you squeak, slightly lost.
your sex life was nothing short of adventurous, to say the least.
“like maybe…” he hums teasingly. “you take control?” lando raises his eyebrows suggestively, and you feel yourself flush.
“me? i thought you liked taking charge?”
lando stops, pulling you into his body. water splatters higher up your legs, cooling you down the slightest amount. his hands cup your cheeks, tilting your head up to look at him.
“i love watching you.” he states simply. “and i wanna watch you push yourself.”
“okay.” you inhale shakily. “okay.” you repeat with more conviction. an idea pops into your head. you can’t resist the smirk that pulls at the corner of your lips, and lando grins at the glimmer in your eyes.
“go back to the house. wait for me in our room.”
“naked?” he quips cheekily.
“what do you think?” you tease. lando kisses you quickly, but you push him back. “go.” you command.
he turns to walk away, repeatedly turning back to you, as if he wants to make sure he hasn’t imagined your entire existence. you just turn your back, staring out to sea. the sky is awash with streaks of purple and orange, and you feel your skin prickle with excitement. you take your time walking back, actively trying to slow yourself down. when you reach the door to the master suite, your breath hitches in your throat.
your husband looks fucking ethereal, stretched out across the off-white linen on the king sized mattress. he’s elongated by the way his head is thrown back, bathed in the lamp light as his muscles flex, taut from the way he’s gripping himself, working himself from base to tip. a faint sheen of sweat coats his bronzer-still skin and your mouth runs dry.
“couldn’t wait?” you rasp, low and dangerous. his eyes flutter open, and the bastard has the audacity to beam at you.
“took too long.” he shrugs, resuming without a care in the world. you hear him pant, teeth gritted from the pleasure.
“hands off, lando.” you slowly undress, untying your sarong and letting it flutter to the floor. your bikini quickly follows, landing in a colourful heap on the floor. you stalk towards him and watch him swallow hard when you perch on your knees at the end of the bed. “you asked for this, amour, and you couldn’t even wait to enjoy it properly.”
you’re pouting at him, feigning sadness. he picks up on it, eyes locked on you, trailing shamelessly over your breasts.
“was thinking about how pretty you looked out there.” lando rasps, fisting the duvet beneath him. you tilt your head to the side, raking your eyes over his frame.
“bad boys don’t get the real thing.”
you smooth your hand up his thigh towards his hipbone, and you notice the way he twitches, cock stood tall and waiting. he’s leaking, desperate and aching, but he plays along, needy for it. you grin lazily, wriggling up the bed until you’re close enough, throwing your leg over one of his until you’re straddling his thigh, the skin warm against your bare cunt.
“baby…” he breathes, bringing up a hand to graze your thigh, but you bat it away.
“no touching.” you scold. “i’m gonna take what i want and,” you pause, thoughtfully. “then, maybe, i’ll give you something.”
lando pouts up at you, slowly retreating his hand until it’s back at his side. his jaw is tight as he fights to keep his mouth shut, trying to be content with just watching. after all, you are quite the sight.
you roll your hips experimentally, gasping at the way your clit grazes his skin. your head falls back, out of it as you find a rhythm that works. you drag yourself backwards and forwards, panting as you go, your wetness smearing across his flexed thigh.
“it’s so good, lando,” you moan. “wish you could touch me, but you don’t behave.” you tut, smirking down at him.
“i’ll be good, baby.” he chokes, and your eyes fly open. you rake you eyes over the shape of him, the tense dips of each of his abs, the way his hip bone pulses, leading all the way down to where he’s throbbing.
“looks painful.” you bite your lip. “want me to help?”
“please.” he coos, reaching out for you again before he thinks better of it, twisting his fingers back into the sheets until his knuckles are white.
you grip the base of his cock, loose at first, squeezing tight a few times. his mouth falls open, a deep, unhinged groan rumbling through his chest. you almost lose yourself in how gorgeous he looks but you remain focused, fucking your hand up and down on him a few times, experimenting.
“you gotta wait, amour.” you warn, thumbing at the tip, smearing beads of pre cum over the head. lando whines, squeezing his eyes shut, teeth gritting so hard that his jawline pops, defining it even more than usual. you grin. he’s wrapped so tight around your finger.
“don’t tease me.” he begs, bucking his hips into your hand.
“but you gotta keep it all in for me, amour. save it all so you can fill me up whenever i want.” your voice drips all over him like honey, making him shiver violently.
“you can’t just say that-“
“i can, lando. i can,” you giggle, evil. “and you’re gonna take it.” it’s a promise and a threat and he’s seconds away from blowing his load all over you.
“jesus, i’ve created a fucking monster.” lando hisses, gasping with every slow rub of your hands over his cock.
“and now you’re gonna deal with the consequences, sweetheart.” you purr. “you wanna fuck me?”
his eyes shoot wide open, and he nods desperately, his gaze boyish and needy.
“so wet for you, lando, think i’ll just sink right…” you trail off, manoeuvring yourself so that you’re hovering over his length, red and swollen. “down.” you moan, filling yourself up with ease.
lando cries out, a broken man of his own design, and you pant, rocking yourself backwards and forward as you adjust to the intrusion.
“we feel so good together.” you breathe, peering down at where he’s splitting you open.
“so good.” lando affirms. “can i touch you?” he whines, the veins in his arms protruding through his skin. they remind you how powerful he is, how easily he could flip you over and pound into you like a madman, but he’s letting you destroy him and he’s loving every second. you clamp down around him at the thought, a gush of your slick dripping down around him.
“touch me.” you comply, and he springs from the mattress, sitting unsupported in the middle of the bed as his hands snake around your waist. you anchor him though, holding him close as he holds you tight against him, rutting up into you so deliciously that you cry out his name wetly, face buried in his hair. “so good for me.” you whisper.
your hands cup his face, pulling back from his frizzy curls enough to press your lips to his, swallowing each-others moans.
“gonna come, baby.” lando mumbles into your lips, eyes glazed over with panic, scared you’re gonna deny him.
“that’s okay, amour, you saved it all for me.” you kiss the words against the corner of his mouth, eyes fluttering shut as your own orgasm tightens your belly to the point of no return. “good boy, lando, fill me up now, sweetheart.”
the grunt he lets out heightens into a whine, lost to the crook of your neck as he releases, grinding into you as he lets go. it sends a rush of heat up your spine, a flame to gunpowder, and you thrash in his arms, meeting your own end seconds later.
you come down in his embrace, pulling away to meet his wide eyes, awestruck and glossy.
“thank you, baby.” he mutters, hugging you tight for just a moment, before rolling you onto your back.
“love you.” you whisper, confused as to where he’s going when he starts to move down the bed.
you don’t have to wonder for long, watching as he settles his head against your thigh, licking his lips as he finds his release dripping out of you. two fingers run through your folds, teasing each and every overstimulated nerve. your teeth sink into your bottom lip right when his fingers sink into your cunt. lando’s in a daze, watching the way everything seeps out of you.
“keep it in for me.” lando slurs, transfixed on every clench of your spent cunt around his thick fingers. your eyes roll back in your head.
-
you roll over in the bed, the sunlight streaming through the linen curtains rousing you from your slumber. you push your hair from your face, reaching blindly for your husband but your hand lands on cold sheets, thudding dully against the mattress. you wrinkle your nose, sitting up and scanning the bedroom. you don’t find him, confused. he never wakes up first. your feet meet the cool tiles of the floor and you pad into the en-suite to freshen up, pulling a loose robe on before you make your way downstairs. you can smell eggs, toast and something floral, and you grin giddily, already anticipating what awaits.
you find lando in the middle of the kitchen, sleepy eyed and smiling at you like you’re the centre of the universe, sent to earth just for him. he’s surrounded, surrounded, by flowers, all kinds of varieties, and they flood the space, every surface covered by bouquets and arrangements. behind him, nestled amongst the sea of pinks, yellow and whites, the table is laid out with a delicious spread, and you feel a pang of hunger at the sight of fresh pastries and juices.
“mon dieu.” you sigh dreamily, grazing a hand over flower petals as you make your way through the jungle towards lando. “all of this for me? how the fuck did you manage this?” you swoon, wrapping your arms around his neck. he leans down, kisses you sweet and slow.
“rumour has it, there are no flowers left on the island.” he chuckles into your neck, and you giggle, leaning up to kiss him again.
“you’re insane.” you reply, awestruck. how did you get so lucky?
“ready for the day?” lando asks, toying with the ends of your hair.
“as long as i get to eat my body weight in sfogliatella first.” you tell him, eyeing the table behind him hungrily.
-
droplets of water sparkle in the sunlight, dripping slowly down his lean back, flexing with every shake of his head.
lando had crawled out the pool, and right between your legs, where he now resides, mouthing at the crotch of your bikini bottoms. he snaps the band of them against your waist, and you arch further into him every time his nose bumps your clothed clit.
“you’re being mean.” you whine, head falling back against the sun lounger. your book has fallen to the stone paved floor, your place surely lost, but you couldn’t care less. every time you pick the damn thing up, your husband has found a new, unique, way to entice you out of actually reading it, usually with his tongue.
“you want my mouth, baby? just say please.” he smirks up at you, wet curls falling over his eyes. water droplets drip over your thighs, cold against your warm skin and you shiver.
“please.” you growl, not really meaning it, but it’s the thought that counts, right?
“polite.” lando tuts, but he relents, twisting the ties that hold the bottoms together until they come undone. he tugs the material away, throws it blindly, and the quiet splash that sounds from behind him tells you both that they’d landed in the pool. he looks up at you, sheepish, and you glare at him.
“make it up to me.” you mutter, bucking your hips into his face.
lando complies, closing his mouth over your clit, sucking softly at the bud. you’re throbbing for him, writhing in the heat of the sun at his electric touch.
two fingers slither between your folds, and he groans into your cunt at the slickness that he finds there, laving his tongue through your slit to savour your taste before his fingers sink inside of you. as he builds a rhythm, fingertips bumping that special spot, you cry out, melting completely into the lounger.
“can feel us from earlier,” lando slurs, lips bumping your clit as he speaks. you shiver, the wet squelch between you quivering thighs leaving you utterly breathless. “so good for me, keeping it all in.”
you let go a few seconds later, grinning languidly as you watch him lick his fingers clean through your sunglasses. he kisses you cheekily, leaving you with your taste on your tongue, and he throws himself back into the pool.
“get my bikini bottoms!” you call, flustered by the way the low sun hits him, paints his golden and shiny.
“but i prefer the view without them.” he winks, but dives under the water to retrieve them nonetheless.
-
“‘m so, so in love with you.” lando rasps into your ear, mouthing at the skin of your flushed cheeks.
you’re chest to chest, eyes locked as he grinds into you, deeper and deeper somehow with every thrust. he leaves you dizzy, tingling and weightless with every stroke, hips brushing yours.
“lando,” you sigh dreamily, threading your fingers through his curls. they’re loosening from the humidity, the heat burning between you both, no longer perfectly coiled like they had been during your dinner date.
lando had hired out a small italian restaurant overlooking the sea, soft fairy lights strung over your heads as you’d sipped wine, hands loosely clasped together. he’d toyed with your wedding band the whole time, eyes rarely leaving yours. it was a perfect end to a perfect honeymoon, and as he’d driven you back to your villa, the tension had simmered.
he had you on your back quickly, but he was careful with you, lazily revealing more and more skin as he slowly undressed you. he’d tried to slide between your thighs, eyes lit up with longing, but you’d refused him. you needed him against you, buried so deep, intertwined. lando hadn’t fought you much, pouting at the deprivation of getting a taste, but when he’d slid his cock through your folds, easy because of your glistening slick, his eyes had rolled back and he’d gotten over the disappointment.
“you’re so perfect.” you pant, leaning up to kiss him. it’s sweet, full of passion, leaves you wanting. “i love you.” you whisper when he pulls away, his forehead resting intimately against yours. warm breaths mingle, rapid and needy from the intensity of it all.
when you fall apart under him, a string of jumbled french rolls off of your tongue, your eyes squeezed shut at the pure inferno of ecstasy that washes over you. you’re both damp with sweat, his curls falling in a mess over his forehead, framing pretty eyes that roll back in his head when he burrows deep and reaches his own release.
once you’re untangled, you lay facing each other and his fingertips ghost over the curve of your bare waist. you watch one another, utterly content with the silence, bathing in the warmth of the bedside lamp and the pale moonlight that filters in through the open balcony doors. the cool nighttime breeze grazes over your naked bodies, pulling you out of the unrelenting heat of the moment and into something serene, peaceful.
“i can’t wait to spend my life with you.” lando whispers, his words soft in the quiet of the room. you let them wash over you, tuned in to the waves rippling against the shore in the distance. you grin coyly back at him, grabbing the hand that he’s stroking you with. you pull it to your lips, kiss it sweetly.
you fall asleep with his arms wrapped around you, your back to his chest, loose curls tickling the skin of your neck. one of his hands rests gently over your lower belly, covered with one of yours.
your bags wait by the door, packed and ready to go home, where the rest of your life with him begins.
-
“i like this colour better, i think.” you muse, flicking between paint swatches. violet white and apple moon have caught your attention, but you wonder if a colder undertone would work best. you’ve taken on the task of redoing a guest room, a little end of summer project.
lando wrinkles his nose and you roll your eyes playfully.
you’re lounged across your sofa, the sun slowly dipping behind the horizon and you watch it through the open balcony doors. the room is tinged orange, glowing, painting your husband angelic.
“don’t you think something… warmer would work better?” he asks, leaning closer to have another look.
“not everyone loves fluorescent yellow.” you tease, and he wraps an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into his side.
“okay, not that.” he laughs. “what about,” he scans the other swatches on the coffee table, reaching for one. “this one?”
he hands you honey beam, and you toy with the small card.
“i think it’s too pink.” you say.
“it’s cute! i just think we should paint it something soft, just in case…” he trails off, leaning forward and immersing himself in the samples. you lean in, too, chasing him. he has this small smile on his lips, lost in thought.
“hey, ‘in case’ what?” you ask.
lando turns to you, just stares for a second. the low sun makes your eyes sparkle, and he melts.
“in case we get pregnant.” he says quietly.
“oh.” you coo, grinning up at him. “i suppose you have a point.”
“yeah?” he breathes, excited in a way you can only compare to a sweet, innocent puppy.
“yeah.”
“like, baby, i love your eye for design but i don’t want our baby to grow up in a a pretentious, grey, prison-“ lando teases you, and you shut him up by wrestling him back onto the sofa.
“ve te faire foutre.” you scold, kissing over his cheeks.
“i love you and i love our house.” lando murmurs sincerely.
the paint swatches are forgotten as you laugh together and kiss him sweetly into the sofa.
-
lando relaxes into the seat, waiting for the plane to take off. oscar sits across from him, already falling asleep, hoodie pulled tight around his head. charles and alexandra are supposed to be joining them on the flight back to nice. he wonders where they are - he wants nothing more than to get home, curl into his wife’s side. lando snaps a picture of his dozing teammate, smirking at the screen, but before he can upload it to his instagram story, your contact photo fills the screen. he accepts the facetime, beaming as your tired eyes meet his through the screen.
“hey baby.” lando coos, sticking his tongue out at you.
“mon amour,” you greet, grinning at him lazily. “have you taken off yet?” you ask softly. you’re on your side in bed, blankets cocooning you, and lando aches to be there with you.
“soon, waiting for your brother and alex.” lando rolls his eyes jokingly, and you tut.
“i’ll tell them off.” you frown, unserious.
“god, don’t do that! i’m already terrified of that man.” lando shivers, and your laugh fills his ears, warms the blood flowing through his cheeks. “are you okay, though, baby? you look tired.”
“yeah, think it’s just sugar crash,” you half shrug. “i’ve been really tired for the last few days, it’s nothing.”
“sugar?” lando’s eyebrows furrow. you’re not one for sugary things, supplementing it with your body weight in snacks. you’re a savoury girl, through and through.
“yeah, i’m all kinder-d out.” you giggle, sheepish. his eyes go wide.
“my kinder?” lando gasps, feigning hurt. he sees it, then, the pile of wrappers on the nightstand behind you.
“whoops? don’t even know what came over me, but your entire stash is gone.”
“how am i ever gonna forgive you for this?” lando shakes his head, smirking at the screen.
“just get more on the way back? please?” you plead, giving him the eyes that he’d die for.
“course, baby.” he promises, but he’s mulling it all over in his head. “you’re not getting sick, are you?”
cravings. overly tired. all you had to say next was that you were nauseous and he’d be buying a crib. he kept his mouth shut, though, because it clearly hasn’t dawned on you yet.
“not sure, i’ve been fine mostly.” you shrug again, and lando can’t help but smile like a fool. “what?” you ask, noticing his untamed expression.
“nothing, i just love you. okay, baby, i’m gonna call charles and see where he is. i’ll be home in a few hours.”
“don’t forget my kinder!” you call, blowing him a kiss. “have a good flight, amour, i love you.”
lando can’t quieten his mind, too overwhelmed with the possibility that you’re about to expand your family, something he’s imagined since before he’d even proposed.
when charles steps onto the small plane, met with the sight of his brother in law grinning like an idiot at absolutely nothing, he wonders, yet again, what kind of joke god was playing on him.
-
you hear the front door open, the soft thud of bags dropping to the floor, and you spring from the mattress. you ignore the way your tummy turns uncomfortably, and speed down the hallway to meet him.
“hey baby.” lando murmurs, holding you tight when you jump into his arms. you never get used to him being gone.
“missed you.” you whisper, breathing in the familiar scent of him, warm and spicy, and even better than usual. “i’m so proud of you.”
lando was leading the championship, but he couldn’t get too comfortable. charles and lewis were looming in the near distance, and oscar was creeping towards the party at a rate of knots. but lando was on a streak of race wins, and he couldn’t deny that your praise made him giddy. after all, these days it was all for you.
“yeah?” lando asks, pressing his forehead against yours. you hum in agreement, leaning in for a kiss. it’s sweet, tender, silent confirmation of just how much you’ve missed one another.
“did you pick up my chocolate?” you pout, fingers intertwined as you walk to the sofa. you drop down, curling up and lando sits next to you.
“i did, and i also got you something else.” lando smiles coyly, unzipping his bag. your eyebrows furrow in confusion.
first, he hands you the kinder chocolate. then, he hands you a pregnancy test.
seeing the two items together makes it dawn on you, and you slap your hands over your face.
“mon dieu!” you gasp. “how did i not realise?” when you lower your hands, lando sees how your eyes glimmer with tears, your lips stretched into a nervous smile.
“so i’m not crazy for thinking it, right?” lando laughs, cupping your cheeks with warm, shaking hands.
“you’re not. should i take it now?”
“i might die if you don’t.” lando’s dead serious, the tension between you palpable.
you stand from the sofa, speed towards the bathroom, and lando watches you go. he sighs, rubbing his eyes, overcome with jitters and excitement.
time seems to stand still as he waits, eyes locked on the door that you’d gone through, waiting for any movement. five minutes must have passed, but if you’d told him it had been five years, he would have believed it. the door handle makes him jump to his feet, and he walks towards you tentatively. your expression is unreadable and he wants to scream.
“so? are you- are we?” lando pleads, only a few steps away from you now.
your neutral expression morphs into one of pure joy, the tears you’d been holding back streaming in a free-for-all.
“all that work we put in must have paid off.” you whisper, and lando surges towards you. your feet leave the ground, held so tight as he spins you around.
“we’re having a baby?” lando breathes, placing you back on the ground carefully.
“you’re gonna be a dad.” you manage through tears.
“my god,” his voice is laced with disbelief, utterly enamoured with you. “i can’t even believe it.” his face is buried in the crook of your neck, and you feel his wet, hot tears pooling there.
“i’m pregnant.” you say it slowly, tasting it on your tongue, feeling the weight of it. your husband clings to you, and your hands rake through his hair, soothing him with your dull nails across his scalp, as you ground yourself in the ecstasy of the moment.
“we did it!” lando cheers, flushed red, his watery eyes shining like the sun hitting the sea. you’re shaking, fingertips grazing your sweatshirt covered belly. his fingers lace with yours, rubbing gentle circles over the fabric.
“we did.” your voice wobbles, cheeks aching from your unshakable smile. “what the hell do we do now?”
“we plan a really elaborate hiding spot so that charles never finds me. you and the baby can visit.” lando replies earnestly, bursting into giggles when you swat his arm.
he pulls you into a kiss, so slow and gentle that the whole house melts away around you; all that’s left is you and him, and something so beautiful that you’ve created together.
“thank you.” lando mumbles against your lips.
“i’m just glad you convinced me not to paint the spare room grey.”
-
taglist
(lemme know if you wanna be added or removed. tags that don’t work will be removed)
@boysthatgovroomvroom @welld0nebaku @thegirlinthefandoms @mcmuppet @japanesekel @vinvantae @ggaslyp1 @dr3lover @smiithys @rachstash @infinitebells @fizzpopsnap101 @gaily19 @icecoldtires @mysticalnightenthusiast @thatchickwiththecamera @oyesmendes @disneydaydreameralways @canyouseethesainz @ferrarifwendvale @fcbformulaeri @tony-stank3 @maih23 @soleilgrec @carolineworld @anthonykatebridgerton @allywthsr @iamasimpingh0e @ophcelia @coffeehurricanes @jennx03 @blueflorals @lqvesoph @sidcrosbyspuck @better-dead-than-smeg @buendiabebeta @pjofics @kovalcin @wintergilmore3 @for-writing-shit @youdontknowmeshh @im-an-overthinker @jule239 @darleneslane @jazzy722 @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @therealone4r @pleasecallmeunhinged @theonlyadrienne
#lando norris#lando norris fic#lando norris smut#lando norris fluff#lando norris x reader#lando norris x leclerc!reader#lando norris x you#f1 fic#f1 smut#f1 fluff#f1 driver x reader#f1 driver x you#smut#leclerc!reader#leclerc!sister#writing things#fluff#formula 1 smut#formula 1 fic#husband!lando#dad!lando norris
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more nanami hcs & scenarios !! nsfw & sfw
nanami kento who would shove his fingers down your throat while you're fucking, just so he could hear you struggle.
nanami kento who would cook dinner for you every night. if you ask to cook, he'd make you do the very minimal tasks.
nanami kento who dominates you in bed and acts like a submissive man when you finish having sex
nanami kento who would listen your favourite songs and save them to a secret playlist dedicated to you.
nanami kento ROLE PLAYS. (as much as I hate the thought of professor nanami) he would totally do any type of roleplay: teacher/student, boss/employee, pet/owner, doctor/patient, celebrity/fan and yeah you get it. also he would NOT break character at all.
nanami kento who would take pictures of you before you both head out somewhere
nanami kento who fucks you out of pure jealousy when he sees you talking with someone else, even if its just for a second
nanami kento who changes personalities when hes around you
nanami kento who seduces you to bed instead of going at it right away, he loves foreplay and would savour his time with you before getting to the good part
nanami kento who would stroke your hair and hum your favorite melody while you both lay in bed before you going to bed.
nanami kento is an experimentalist idc how much times im gonna say this he is an experimentalist he would literally try anything and would be willing to do anything to you he. is. an. experimentalist.
nanami kento who kisses your forehead every morning and waits for you to wake up so you could brush your teeth together
nanami kento who would pick up the phone even if hes fucking you, he would try to challenge you to stay quiet as he talks to the person on the other side, while also hitting every right spot.
nanami kento who would cuddle you after he's finished a long day of work.
nanami kento loves semi public sex. thats it. no explanation
nanami kento who remembers every single thing about you, if you were to ask him he would answer in a heartbeat
nanami kento who would use you as a stress reliever whenever hes angry.
nanami kento who would constantly talk about you to others and saying how proud he is to have someone like you
nanami kento who loves to dirty talk
nanami kento who would help you understand something without making you sound dumb. even if you both can't understand something he would try to learn it quickly before telling you
nanami kento who would wrap his biceps around your neck as he takes you from the back
nanami kento who's obessed with an unusual attribute of yours, something only he likes
nanami kento who cries during sex
nanami kento who fell in love with you at first sight
you could tell which ones I was excited to write about lol, and if u rmr the other hcs post I made, some of them may be mentioned so sorryyyy anyway some more detailed (ish) extras below !!
extras ++
nanami would definitely fuck you with music in the background, but he'd put it on low just so he could hear your sounds echo through the room. he only thought putting music would make the setting more fitting but he never really wanted to hear someone else when he has you in front of him.
more explanation on the crying during sex, he would have happy tears as he fucks you. its tears of gratefulness that you're there in his life and he's glad to be with someone like you.
he would definitely jerk off to your face when he's all alone and though he seems like an honest person he'd never actually tell you that he did that to your face just so you dont feel uncomfortable.
a really really odd thought I have is pervert Nanami.. now hear me out I know perverts are gross and all but nanami would honestly suit the roll really well. cat calling as you walk by him, staring you up and down in a subway. taking secret pictures of you and getting off at them later. basically being a total creep in general!
stalker nanami. once he finds his new obsession, hes hooked, and he knows you're the one. its dumb but he would first follow you to your house. thats all he needs and hes got it. he would follow your every move, try to break in and steal your things, and eventually "accidentally" create some coincidences so he could get closer to you. basically joe goldberg shit (besides the murdering part)
shower sex! shower sex!!!! he would hold onto you, very carefully, just so you dont slip as he takes you in so perfectly. he would go slow at first but when he can't control himself anymore he would quicken the pace and go FAST.
he loves hearing you say his name and would practically keep bugging you so he could hear you say his name multiple times. or while you guys are having sex he would keep begging you to call his name out, on every thrust btw.
he doesn't share.
though,,, I do see him as a voyeur. he would definitely get off at you masturbating to yourself or listen to the sounds of you doing something sexual, whatever it is.
I said he doesn't share but the thought of him getting jealous at the sight of you getting fucked by anyone else but him is what's so SJNFOSOSJ like imagine he comes home one night and hears sounds from your room and, of course curious, checks out what's going on and sees you getting fucked by another man!!!!!!! ughh the look on his face would probably be soooo hotttt
he's extremely kinky idc what you say he has the most weirdest kinks too and im not complaining.
recording during sex!!! fuck, thats actually so hot.
says I love you on every thrust
#jjk#nanami kento#jujutsu kaisen#i love nanami kento#i need him#jjk nanami#im going insane#nanami my love#nanami x reader#hes so fine#nanami headcanons#kento nanami#nanami smut#jujutsu nanami#ok so I dont have more ideas rn#but I love him#aaaa#hes so sexy oh my god I love nanami#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk smut#jjk head cannons#ok im done
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would you be open to doing bf headcanons for hamzah? they could be sfw and nsfw or just sfw. love ur writing :). <3
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BF Headcanons _♡
SFW
i’m a very opinionated person, so asking me about my hamzah headcanons is a FIELD DAY for me
I’ve always said this but I feel like hamzah (in the beginning of the relationship) is very shy? Not in the way of “ignore any possible interaction between you and him” but more of a “ignores eye contact after a kiss” or “blushes when you call him a nickname for the first time”
He acts like he hates when you baby him but behind closed doors… BIGGEST BABY EVERRRR
It took him a while to hold your hand in public, not because he's embarrassed but again because he gets too flustered when you run your thumb up and down against the back of his hand,,, or when you play with his hands in general.
I MENTIONED THIS BEFORE IN A FIC BUT HAMZAH IS AN EAR BLUSHER AND HE'S SO CUTE WAA
If you get on his lap and play with his hair while talking about random stuff, and you kiss him out of nowhere HE’LL SMILE THIS BIG SMILE AND COVER HIS EARS IM CRYINGGGGG HES SO CUTE
Speaking of kissing lololol
Hamzah’s kisses are SENSUAL, he takes his time and really makes sure you feel his love
Contrary to popular belief i feel like if you’re with hamzah for long enough his love language becomes physical touch
And i dont say that and mean ONLY kisses but hes such a cuddly person. HE NEEDS THAT TLC HES A BIG BOY
BUT. Big but! He is not the type of person to show affection publicly IM SORRYYY
Holding hands and hugging is fine but i think more intimate things he’d rather do in private…
Not because hes embarrassed as i said, he gets shy at other people perceiving that version of him especially since he isn’t ‘acting’ or ‘joking’
Also he feels like only you deserve to see him like this hehehe
His love language is quality time. Like actually.
His head on your chest, playing stardew valley on his ipad. You watching TV or reading while playing with his curls.
Another form of this is that he’ll ask you to be him and martins cameraman just to have you there with him
Or he’ll ask if you want to try a new coffee shop that opened down the street
He’s a man that likes to be around you 24/7
ALSO ALSO ALSO OMG OMG
HE WOULD SO FORCE YOU TO DO BACKGROUND VOCALS FOR SOME OF HIS MUSIC LIKE THE RAPPERS HE LIKES LMFAO
I dont wanna go on too long with this but one thing is for sure
You’re his princess for REAL treats you like ROYALTY lol
If you guys get into an argument. Even if you’re wrong, he ends up apologizing
“I shouldn’t have let it boil over to this anyway.”
10/10 boyfriend. Totally recommend.
NSFW
SISTA. I HAVE NEVER EVER THOUGHT I’D HAVE THE PLATFORM TO SHARE THESE THOUGHTS BUT I HAVE TO MAKE SURE YALL UNDERSTAND ONE THING!!!!
Hamzah is NAWT a boob or ass guy. HE LIKES BOTH EQUALLY. (He is secretly is ass-leaning tho LMFAO)
This is so funny but he totally is the type to smack your ass randomly when he walks by.
Do you get mad? Yes. Do you tell him to stop it? Yes. Does he stop? No. Do you secretly think it's kinda…? WELL YESSS
TWO WORDS. Boob squeezer.
I think from what we can understand so far. is that Hamzah is the handsy man. HIS HANDS ALWAYS SOMEWHERE LOL
sex drive is for sure high. and when i say high… ITS HIGHHH
Contrary to popular belief AGAIN.
Hamzah doesn’t partake in dirty talk much… not that he doesn't like it—he just wouldn’t in my opinion? It's not that he wouldn’t talk at all, but he is more of a heavy breathing, whimpering, moaning guy—pretty much more noises than actual words
Though as i said, he would talk sometimes, especially if he’s feeling really good, or his stamina is lasting him longer than he thought… he starts getting a little cocky
On the topic of dirty talk, if he does talk, 99.9% of it would be praising, i don't see him enjoying degrading unless you ask him to.. but he’ll be a little awkward about it LMFAOOO
Something like: “fuck, baby you’re taking me so good.”
(Unironically starts actually using good girl after a while of making it a joke btw)
Someone sent a request a few days ago and said “i feel like hamzah has a breeding kink” and why was i gagged?! NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT BUT YES, i feel like hes more into the thought filling u with *** then the thought of impregnating you if that makes any sense
Im talking too much… digital footprint go hard.
(A/N): this isnt proofread, i kinda braindumped but i had fun doing this!! Thank u anon for the request I HOPE U LOVE THIS CUTIE MWAAAAHH
#hamzahthefantastic#slushy noobz#hamzah fluff#hamzah x reader#hamzah x y/n#deer’s reqs!#hamzah smut#hamzah the fantastic
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For any nonhumans struggling with species dysphoria, I want to help you all as much as I can. I've been experiencing it all week. It can be quite exhausting and put you in a lot of distress, in my case. X(
Here are some tips I'd recommend to help:
1. Mimic the diet of your kintype/theriotype. You are a shark? Eat seafood. A dragon? Maybe try to burn some food a little (or turn it black like my own preference if you want). You kin a character from [Insert source]? Try recreating foods/dishes from their world or dimension.
2. Listen to relatable music. I'd recommend making a playlist of any songs that feel species affirming/euphoric, or even echo that dysphoria further, therefore turning it relatable. (Few of my favorites are Bones by Imagine Dragons, Control by Halsey, Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land by MARINA, Momento Mori by Fish in a Birdcage, among other songs that feel therian coded to me).
3. Do vocals. Howling, barking, screeching, or roaring are very relieving if you are in the correct space to do them! If you are in a quite space or do not want to out yourself to anyone, try purring, growling, hissing, or other unnoticeable sounds. You have an object kintype? Mimic the sounds of the object, like beeping, clicking, etc. (I personally make microwave sounds just because it is fun). Recite voice lines of your kintype from the source they are in. Mimic their voice and volume to match.
4. Move and physically act like your kintype/theriotype. Quadrobics, mimic the flapping of wings, walk bidepedally, whatever you do, turn your mannerisms and motion to reflect your kintype/theriotype.
5. Dress like your kintype/theriotype. Is your kintype a character? Cosplay them, or mimic their clothing style, clothing color, hairstyle, etc. If they have tattoos, scars, or patterns on their body, copy them on your physical form with paint or pens. (PLEASE USE NON TOXIC MATERIALS. STUFF SAFE FOR YOUR HUMAN SKIN.) Are you a species of animal(s)? Dress in your species' colors, or, once again, paint or color yourself like it/them. Are you perhaps any other form of creature or object? You can use the same tips as the others, and another idea that works for all is that you can buy costume pieces of your kintype/theriotype. Masks, headbands, just normal clothing in general, the options really are infinite.
6. Express your dysphoria through artwork. I love doing art when I am heavily species dysphoric. Drawing, crafting masks, origami, painting, collages, all are forms of art. If you are skilled in music, then you could even create some songs of your own!
7. Go out and explore nature. This one is mainly targeted towards therians, whose types are grounded on the life on earth rather than other dimensions or universes, but just like the other methods, it can be universally used by any types of nonhumans. Collecting things is my favorite way of exploring nature. Collect rocks, shells, sticks, leaves, bugs, plants, anything that makes you feel more comfortable in your own (unfortunate) physical body. Stay grounded in the world around you and you may find the dysphoria slips away. Hiking and going on short walks can also help, building a den, smelling the scents of the outdoors. All great ideas that I personally recommend.
8. Write about your feelings. Whether you are good at expressing yourself through poetry, you keep a diary/journal, or you can project onto OCs for new backstory lore like I do, writing can truly help with any dysphoria. Not only that, but it is sometimes refreshing to come back later and read about what you were feeling before. It can serve as a great reminder that you are a powerful being and you will always overcome the feelings if you try.
9. Research about your kintype/theriotype. It does not matter if you are an animal, concept, or object from earth, a being from fantasy, or a character from the greatest book or show, you learn something new every day. So why not learn about yourself? Read books or watch animal documentaries of your theriotype(s), same thing for you otherkins and your fantasy species. Fictionkins can look up facts about themself as a character, their book, show, game, etc.
10. Talk and interact with other alterhumans/nonhumans. Remember, we are a community, and while you are experiencing horrible episodes of species dysphoria, there are many other beings going through the exact same thing at the exact same time. So why not talk to them about it? Share your experiences, help eachother cope, you may even connect with more individuals that way, building more relationships with others and meeting new beings.
11. Past life meditation. If you are a nonhuman who has a past life/lives, you may find comfort in meditation, where you can truly tap into what you once were, and still are in this life as well. Look to the forgotten, and turn in to remembered. Open up your past and live over again.
12. Listen to sounds. Nature sounds, voices of other characters you know from your world, vocals or sound effects of your kintype. These are all good options to turn to if you want to feel at ease with yourself.
13. Let your emotions out. Sometimes this is all you really need to do when species dysphoria hits hard. Cry, bite things, claw at pillows, LET IT OUT. There is absolutely no problem in being yourself and expressing your heavy emotions in your own, unique, nonhuman way. You may find you feel much better after.
That's all I've got, but I hope whoever/whatever reads this far has an amazing day/night. You are an amazing being, thank you for embracing yourself and living authentically. <3
#therian#therian community#therianthropy#alterhumanity#alterhuman#alterhuman community#fictionkin#objectkin#conceptkin#nonhuman#species dysphoria#otherkin#otherkin community#otherkinity
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This year is the 5th Annual #Azirafeast, The Feast Day of the Angel Aziraphale, an inclusive fandom event! It’s celebrated on November 19th! It’s a made up holiday that brings the community together, regardless of how a person participates in fandom.
On Nov.19, everyone is welcome to celebrate The Feast Day of Aziraphale by drinking cocoa and wine, eating good food, reading, being stylish on their own terms, enjoying the company of friends and embracing the spirit of Aziraphale! Please share your pics on socials with #Azirafeast!
On Nov. 19, Creators are encouraged to show Aziraphale indulging in what makes him happy or why you love him (canon or fanon!) Create “Lore” for why Aziraphale has a feast day! What miracles throughout history has he performed? Creations can be dramatic, serious, sexy or silly!
All forms of creation are welcome: Draw, write, sing, act, sew, bake, cosplay or anything else! However YOU want to appreciate our favorite Angel. All variations, versions and representations of Aziraphale are welcome for #Azirafeast
And remember, you don’t have to “make” anything to participate in #Azirafeast on Nov. 19. Eating cake and lying to your boss is a great way to celebrate! Confuse some customers, watch a nature documentary, get drunk, listen to your favorite music, be kind to someone who is new or lost!
Anything tagged #Azirafeast I will reblog, the same on Bluesky, Instagram and Twitter. I’ve had a permanent highlight on my Instagram for the last four years, and maintained this tumblr. Checkout what others have made for previous years!
There is also an AO3 collection: https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Azirafeast
Anything added to it I will promote on my socials for #Azirafeast.
I know I don’t have the biggest following, but the idea is that on the feast of Aziraphale, even fans who don’t have a large social media presence will still be seen, still have their experiences noticed, and will feel part of a community that cares.
Folks can get stressed about creating by a “due date.” I encourage folk to post early if they want, and to keep posting after Nov. 19th if they miss the day or don’t finish in time.
Just make sure to tag your contributions, whether they are pics or creations, with #azirafeast so we can celebrate with you! Please feel welcome to take my words and reshare any way that you would like, and make your own posts to generate awareness! Please do share in any fandom communities your part of, or feel free to try and convince people IRL that this is a totally real holiday.
I do not run, own, control or anything of the sort in regards to #azirafeast. The idea came from Cliopadra and a private discord server, and the brilliant folk there randomly picked a date and ran with it. The reason I made this blog and encourage people to participate is because I think it’s a lovely idea! It is NOT “mine.”
#azirafeast#Azirafeast2024#feast of aziraphale#azirafeast art#good omens#good omens fandom#the feast of aziraphale
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okay after reading all the goth hc, I gotta ask. how do you think the guys would react (any of them but preferred Floyd and Idia ) to playing them goth music/show them a trad goth outfit/makeup look (suprise them maybe? For example: I hc Leona to just have the least slay music taste to mankind (beastmankind?) so you play him- idk let’s say Lebanon Hanover, and he’s like “wtf is this herbivore?” But then he kinda gets into it. no pressure to write for it btw!
-✨♥️✨
ANON I was literally thinking about making a post like this a few days before this ask... you have my heart. I'm doing a full post
summary: nrc boys and goth type of post: headcanons characters: nrc students additional info: platonic or romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, half-headcanons half-x reader author's note: I'm assuming that goth as a subculture and a music scene already exists in this world. this post is also mostly about the music scene
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Riddle is essentially a baby bat
he's like, two bad life choices away from going full victorian goth at any given moment
he flat out refuses to listen to anything "vulgar" but secretly adores the dark, poetic side to goth
he's also morbidly obsessed with death, being a sad victorian boy and the child of two doctors. it works
as much as I hate to say it, Ace starts out as the kind of guy to say he wants a "goth gf" on multiple occasions
he proudly announces it to everyone at an unbirthday party once and Riddle almost kills him for being annoying for interrupting
thinks the music is too sad
...but he mellows out eventually (your influence)
both Deuce and Trey are not particularly interested
(Deuce leaned into punk music as a preteen but has since "given it up" because it's too unruly for an aspiring honors student, in his opinion)
Cater inexplicably already knows a lot about goth
won't talk about it unless you bring it up first but if you play him something semi-popular
he'll be like "oh yeah I know that one"
he has a few songs on his playlist he listens to when he's alone
is a goth magnet himself. pulls many hot goths. no one knows how
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jack is also not really into it. not his thing
however I can see him secretly being into emo
make of that what you will
and Ruggie will never pass you the aux again. he calls it "halloween music"
Leona acts thoroughly uninterested for a long time
like, he'll listen to the music you give him, but doesn't really say whether he likes it or not
says he doesn't care about the scene (thinks it's too pretentious)
and pretends to be annoyed when you give him more song recs
but he gets into it. he starts listening on his own
he has a definite preference for gothic rock
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jade is already goth (to me at least)
and very eager to talk about his favorite bands
loves giving recommendations
apparently the coral sea has its own goth subgenres and bands, which sound... much different from land ones
Floyd will listen (has listened, thanks to his brother) but he doesn't particularly care
he much prefers the aesthetic, it reminds him of home
...being that he's from the deep sea, where it's dark and cold
the flowy, dark, elegant looks are just enchanting to him. he can't keep his eyes off it
Azul couldn't be bothered
he's willing to learn, but isn't a huge fan of the general... strangeness
(he doesn't really understand why anyone would want to be perceived as strange in the first place)
and the music is so unmelodic to him
"that was just a man moaning and a gate creaking for seven minutes" and then he bans you from his office
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Kalim literally listens to goth already
I don't know how to explain it but I know he does
it's so funny because he never ever dresses goth or acts stereotypically goth but every once in a while he'll be like "who wants to hear my new favorite song? :D" and it's like, alien sex fiend. and no one can say anything about it
Jamil is an appreciator
depending on what you show him, he could really get into the lyricism and general mood
...if only because he finds goth dancing absolutely mesmerizing
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Rook is goth
he only dresses the part sometimes, but he's always been very passionate about the poetic elements of the music
...really into french coldwave
in terms of fashion he leans romantic goth
it just makes sense to me. he could find beauty in absolutely anything, and the dark and macabre are no exception
will talk your ear off about his favorite bands if you give him the chance
Vil is really more into the style than the music
he's dabbled in a little bit of everything; trad goth, romantic goth, medieval goth. he pulls all of it off
honestly, if anything, the gothic style compliments his features and tastes more than anything
he has such a respect for the subculture and the dedication that goes into the visual elements
Epel doesn't get it. sorry 😔
he will listen to the music you recommend because he cares about you, but he just doesn't like it
he's in the same boat as Azul. "was that a slide whistle?"
absolutely baffled, but he likes you and it's a small price to pay for your happiness
(and he thinks the fashion is too androgynous for his tastes)
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
I feel like Idia also used to think he wanted a goth until he saw the e-girl vs goth discourse, freaked out, then spent two weeks reading about different subcultures
...still wants a goth partner
but now he actually knows what that means
will listen to any music you give him out of respect (fear) and won't say anything about whatever weird taxidermy-related hobby you have
he's surrounded by death all the time anyway who cares
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
you could get Silver to listen to the cure's entire discography and he'd come out of it really enjoying just like heaven and nothing else
it's just... not for him
(plus the slower songs put him to sleep)
Malleus somehow hasn't even heard of goth as a genre when you approach him
he is. a little disappointed it's not music about the architecture style
but he still warms up to it, especially as someone who enjoys finding the beauty in the dark and misunderstood
you can fix him. you can goth him.
Sebek joins only after everyone in Diasomnia gets in on it with you (he doesn't like being left out)
he loves it because silver doesn't and malleus does
peepaw Lilia is an old goth
he was around when the music scene started, and he also remembers the literature movement it was named after, and the popular architecture style that was named after, and...
...you get it
still, he's always pleased to learn about new bands and subgenres and styles and the like
could and will talk about it for hours and hours with you
he dresses the part, too
we love him
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#✨♥️✨#riddle rosehearts x reader#ace trappola x reader#deuce spade x reader#cater diamond x reader#ruggie bucchi x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#jade leech x reader#floyd leech x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#kalim al asim x reader#jamil viper x reader#rook hunt x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#epel felmier x reader#idia shroud x reader#malleus draconia x reader#lilia vanrouge x reader#queued
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Control: The Strange Dynamics of Andy and Leyley or
The Incest End Is Not The Fucking Bad End, Stop Coping
EDIT:
Hey guys! This post is blowing the fuck up, but this was my first essay on this game, and I think I've had many more insightful things to say since then. Here's a link to a masterpost with all of my essays, which I'd definitely suggest reading after this one:
Anyways, without further adieu...
I heard a lot about this game going in. I knew the general story beats and the funny haha incest memes. I knew it was about a toxic codependent relationship where Ashley, the sister, acted like your standard overly-controlling person who used various abuse techniques to keep someone in line. I expected Ashley to be a yandere-type character where she was borderline psychotic, irrational, and had a skewed perception of reality. I expected her to be a crazy bitch, and I love me some crazy bitches.
But then I actually played through the game. ...That is not what I got.
The game advertises Andrew as a doormat extraordinaire who is strung along by his Very Not Good sister and has no agency of his own' that he's just a henpecked abuse victim. But in practice, that doesn't seem to be the case. One of their first exchanges that in the story is when the occultist played his music and Ashley wanted them to check it out. He says 'no', sure, but then he smirks and says 'but I'll come along if you do.'
That is not the dialogue of someone who has no will of their own, that's the dialogue of someone who willingly gives up their own agency.
This is not, on its own, a sign of anything out of the ordinary. What caught my attention with it, though, is how it flew in the face of the common narrative surrounding their relationship dynamic. But that's not the first time I noticed it, it's just the first time, in retrospect, that their actual dynamic begins to show. The first time I personally noticed it is in the choking scene.
There are a lot of ways to view this situation. But my own reading? This was not a crime of passion. This was not him trying to break free. This is him doing something he's thought about for a while. This is premeditated. In this scene, Andrew is done playing along with Ashley's shit. In this scene, I firmly believe Ashley is the victim.
Ashley is the more openly abusive of the two who seeks to do whatever she can to trap Andrew so he'll never leave her. That much is clear. But Andrew-
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-clearly has these same tendencies. He says this shortly after Ashley mentions putting her name up on a call girl's wall for money. There's protective brotherly instincts, and then there's this. This is not something you'd threaten a sister with, this is something that a man would threaten his wife with, which is directly brought attention to in the story.
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(hey look he accepts the framing of it being WIFE beating at face value, and says Ashley is the only one who makes him like that! HMMMMMMMMMM WONDER WHAT THAT IMPLIES???)
It also implies that this is not the first time physical force has been threatened! I mean, that much is obvious, because of the choking scene that happened before, but I more mean that this implies that Andrew either threatening or utilizing physical force is an established pattern of behavior. However, the Decay route implies that she never thought Andy would kill her (but Andrew would) which can either be for or against depending on one's perspective, so I don't hold to the idea that it's an established pattern too strongly.
Okay, so. Andrew has some controlling and possessive tendencies too. So what? Their relationship is codependent. It's advertised as such. What of it?
Well first of all, it pretty much blows the lid off of the idea that Ashley is the sole perpetrator of abuse in their relationship. I've seen a lot of people view Andrew's behavior as justified retaliation against abuse, but frankly, I don't believe that him threatening to strangle Ashley for violating boundaries by trying to hold him accountable for his actions (given the strangulation part happens after she brought up Nina's death and how Andrew was ultimately responsible) is justified. And I ESPECIALLY don't believe that him threatening to backhand Ashley for her transactional attitude towards sex is justified in ANY circumstance.
EDIT: This part was edited in from the original post for the sake of readability so they don't have to see the reblogs to see the updated version! This post gained more traction than I was expecting!
…But perhaps even more telling is what she DOESN'T do.
Pushing someone's boundaries until they lash out is a pretty common tactic in abusive relationships. It's easy to see why, too: It justifies prior behavior and paints them in a negative light to others. This can be an important aspect of using DARVO (deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender) against someone, although the two ideas aren't necessarily linked.
It's pretty easy to argue that this is what Ashley does, but if you look at the one time her boundary pushing DID go too far, when Andrew lashes out with physical violence… she doesn't do that. She doesn't blame him. She doesn't paint herself as the victim. She doesn't even try to give a reason as to why she shouldn't be killed outside of the comfort she gives him. Why is this notable?
Because the mom does, in fact, engage in what could be considered DARVO against Ashley:
(i will elaborate more on this screenshot in particular below)
Ashley is directly compared to Mrs. Graves by Andrew, and yet she crucially displays none of the habits that Mrs. Graves does. Mrs. Graves lays the blame on Ashley, but Ashley doesn't lay the blame on Andrew. Mrs. Graves tends to paint herself as the victim of Ashley, but Ashley does no such thing to Andrew. The mom denies her culpability at every turn; Ashley doesn't. Ashley tries to hold Andrew accountable for his role in Nina's death, which could be considered a kind of DARVO. But she never denies that she had a role to play in it. She just mentions that he was the one who pulled the trigger. And he was.
(and the point was more that she DIDN'T engage in it when threatened with physical violence; the perfect chance to)
In Mrs. Graves' mind, she is the victim of either Ashley, or society as a whole. In Ashley's mind, she knows what she is, what she does, and what she's about. The only thing she's oblivious to- or doesn't acknowledge, at least- is the threat Andrew poses to her. In her mind, she's the bad guy. In Andrew's mind, Ashley is the bad guy. In official art, she is the bad guy:
And yet, in the game itself, Andrew is the one holding the cleaver. Not her. Hm.
Ashley is the world's most convenient scapegoat. She allows people to mask their own worst habits and pretend they're better people than they are. She accepts this role. She embraces it. She doesn't try to deny it. But when that mask slips, people lash out at her. Both Mrs. Graves and Andy (NOT Andrew, crucially) predicate much of their self-perception on being what she's not.
But they're the ones who enabled her to become like this, every step of the way.
And that's what blew my fucking mind, and made me question just who the victim really is. She was never given a chance to be normal, because other people relied on her NOT being normal.
By the end of my second playthrough, I felt worse for Ashley than I did for Andrew, and I still do.
So. What am I getting at? What does this show me about the relationship between Ashley and Andrew?
(I also wanted to point out that Andrew does engage in DARVO too but I didn't want to distract from the behavior of the mother. Unlike what Andrew does, it doesn't require someone to reassess the narrative they have towards the game in order to realize the implications of it, whereas it's pretty easy to justify Andrew's words as not qualifying as DARVO if you buy into the narrative that he's the sole victim and/or that Ashley is the main perpetrator of abuse. A friend of mine pointed out that it's a pretty key part of the push/pull dynamic they have, and I completely agree.
However, the direct comparisons to the behavior of the mother can't be ignored no matter your narrative, so I felt as if I needed to highlight that more.)
EDIT OVER
It shows me that their relationship is all about control.
Specifically, the push and pull of who controls who in any given situation.
Andrew weaponizes his incompetence. He always looks to lay the blame on Ashley. This is drawn attention to several times, and said explicitly in the Decay route.
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He is always surrendering control to her, and yet he never HAS to. He could always just say no. He could always refuse. What are the consequences? Her being upset? Well, unfortunately, it's not that easy. That's not how abuse dynamics work. He probably feels like he has to, or rather, feels like there's no other option. That he's in too deep, and stuck with her no matter what. But personally, I think it's pretty clear from his willingness to surrender control to Ashley that he still feels like he has it at points, because the moment he feels like he's about to lose it, he either considers violence, even as a child-
(the actual scene of slicing her finger is pretty sus too with this reading in mind)
-or resorts to it, outright, in both the choking scene and the vision in the Decay ending... when Ashley doesn't have enough bullets to defend herself (this will be important later!).
SO WHAT POINT AM I TRYING TO MAKE??? AM I JUST MAKING ABUSE APOLOGIA (the answer may surprise you)?
No. I don't think so.
Ashley is obviously very bad. She's controlling and uses pretty textbook abuse and entrapment tactics on Andrew whereas everything he does to her is inference, with Ashley too daft to realize just how much danger she's in until the vision in the Decay ending spells it out for her- and I don't know if a true abuse dynamic allows for one to be completely unaware of the consequences of breaking free. She could just let go of her desire for control and Andrew would be a much happier person.
And that's the point, because so would she.
I bring up control because that push and pull- that desire for control over each other- is exactly what's tearing their relationship apart, and this effect most obviously manifests in the two endings of episode 2. In the Decay ending, Ashley either tries to exert control over Andrew due to a lack of trust, or Andrew allows his feelings of entrapment to truly take root in his mind and guide his actions. In the Decay ending, Andrew becomes a true doormat with no will of his own, allowing his feelings of bitterness and resentment to fester and grow, eventually resulting in their deaths.
In the Burial ending, Andrew does the exact opposite. He takes control of the situation and does exactly what Ashley would do without much of a fuss. This eventually culminates in THAT scene (assuming you take the Questionable route), where his facial expression alone speaks volumes:
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Look at how fucking confident this man is. This is not the face of someone who's unsure of himself; this is the face of someone who knows exactly what he wants and takes it. He is absolutely in control of this situation, and everyone is happier for it.
And what does Ashley have to do to get this ending?
Let's go back to Decay for a moment. If Ashley has bullets in her gun, she has control over the situation. She, at any point, could put an end to Andrew and survive. And yet, at the very end of it all, she could choose not to. She could choose to surrender control to Andrew, allowing herself to die. And that ending, I believe so much of his life and willpower will have decayed that there's nothing left for him to take control of, leaving him no choice- or rather, no use for the control he now has- but to die with her.
And in the Burial ending, she has to let him out of his cage before it's too late. She has to surrender control to him, and when she does-
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-He will become everything she ever needed him to be.
It's all about her surrendering control, and it's all about him taking control. Because, no matter what, as long as that happens... the two of them will be together forever.
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In life...
...or in death.
How romantic.
So no, the incest end is not the fucking bad end. They're going to be together forever in the end either way, so they might as well live through it.
#gaming#the coffin of andy and leyley#gravecest#ashley graves#andrew graves#someone help me i can't stop thinking about this fucking game
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Curly with an Autistic S/O
A/N: For the first time in MONTHS my ask box is completely empty so you know what that means: time for self indulgent writing woohooo! Also all of these are based on my experiences with autism, I tried to keep it general, so sorry if things written don't apply to every autistic reader
Autistic Reader, Gn reader
Curly was informed beforehand that someone on his crew would have autism, as most companies are required to tell when one of their employees has a disability
Getting this information, Curly did his best to learn how to best help you
He was a bit awkward when he was first introduced to you, but made sure you knew that you were welcome on the crew
At first he thought he overprepared, that he had gotten too anxious to be a perfect captain
You seem to do just fine on your own, doing your duties perfectly fine
It was over time, spending more of his days with you, when he started to pick up on your small traits
he first noticed the way you didn't want to talk to other people
Your silence during group get togethers was noticeable to him, but was drowned out by other people like Daisuke
He noticed how you'd have your earbuds in all day, whether they were playing music or not
He noticed how you'd struggled to adapt to the new food in space
He noticed how uncomfortable you seemed during game night, like you were scared to talk
Slowly but surely, he learnt to help you through some of your problems
He'd use his rights as captain to alter the food a bit for your taste
He'd rather put in the extra effort than let you not eat
He teamed up with you during game night to help you through talking to everyone else on the crew, and with his help you managed to get closer to everyone
Over time he realized that he was starting to fall in love with these tiny traits
He felt like it was inappropriate as a captain to have a crush on one of his crewmates, but he just couldn't help it
He loved the way you talked, even if it seemed odd to other people
He loved that glint in your eye when you talked about one of those things you were passionate about
He loved the way you stimmed when you were happy or just needed to get the energy out
He tried to his those feelings, but with every little one of your traits, the feelings just kept coming up
He helped you through your first meltdown on the ship, giving you soothing words and whatever you needed to calm down
He'd make sure your uniform was perfectly comfortable, nothing that would trigger your sensory issues
He tried to subtly flirt with you, but gave up after he realized all those advances went over your head
The two of you would have late night talking sessions by the screen in the lounge
He would just let you rant about your hyper fixations or special interests
it was one of those nights, out on the couch, looking up at the screen when he let it slip
You were one on of your infodumps when he let it slip out
It was quiet, almost inaudible
"I love you..."
It made you stop in your tracks
He quickly tried to explain it off once he saw your lack of reaction
But when you saw him back tracking, you quickly managed to ramble out that you loved him too, that you were trying to show it to him, but you just weren't showing it clear enough
The time you spent with him, the acts of service, the little trinkets you'd give him
That was your way of showing him that you liked him
Oh
It made sense to him now
He was a bit shocked you liked him back
And under the light of the "night sky" you shared a kiss
Or- well- a few kisses
After that night, the two of you decided to keep your relationship secret
You didn't want to risk the either of you getting into trouble
So your time was confined to your few hours off and your meetings at night in the lounge, granted no one else came to hang out, and night visits to each other's quarters
And though you tried to keep it secret, it wasn't like most members of the crew couldn't tell
The tension between the two of you was palpable
Jimmy was very salty about his friend being in a relationship but Curly made sure Jimmy stayed out of it
And sure, you two got a little out of hand a few times, which may or may not have led to bribing Daisuke to stay quiet after he walked in on a cockpit make out session
He doesn't mind if you wipe his kisses off, although it caught him off guard the first time you did it
The two of you may not be the most subtle, but getting caught is worth it, and he's always there to use his privileges as captain to help you get the extra accommodations you need
Hiii ty for reading. if you liked this fic and want to see more, feel free to make a request! my requests are currently open and my box is empty, I'd love to write something!
#sharkboywrites#mouthwashing#mouthwashing fanfic#curly headcanons#curly x reader#autistic reader#mouthwashing curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing x gn reader#mouthwashing x reader#mouthwashing headcanon#captain curly x reader#capitan curly#grant curly#disabled reader#autistic writer
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since your rodrick request are open
some bf head cannons for him?? 🤗💗
OMG I WOULD LOVE TO DO THIS???? UHM YIPPEE
Rodrick Heffley x Reader
Pronouns: Second person, referenced boyfriend meme but it can be taken in any way
TW: Stinky bro, Greg, uh more stinky
- So first off, general headcannons is he def is like, bisexual. His eyeliner is too good for him to be straight/j
- Also his main love languages are definitely acts of service and touch
- But onto like, genuine relationship thingy
- As much as I love him, he is a stinky little guy dude
- He showers like, once a week maximum, and washes his clothes somehow less. It takes copious amounts of coaxing to get him to start legitimately showering
- He obviously listens to you better than his parents, so he starts showering a little more than he did before (his family thanks you)
- mind you he goes from like, 1 shower a week to 2.5 so I mean progress is progress
- Speaking of his family, Susan loves you regardless of your gender
- She's just glad that someone is getting him to be a functioning member of society instead of a dirty mole rat
- Greg is uh...freaky bro
- he writes about you in his journal (you get ur own goofy stick figure) and either low-key has a crush on you or actually despises you with his entire being
- It depends on if you're a lot like Rodrick or if you have that sweet charm turned on for him family
- Frank is actually terrified of y'all's relationship ending, because he was getting tired of yelling at Rodrick to turn his music down, or clean his room, and you actually get him to do that
- He has a heart attack every time Rodrick does some stupid shit or you both get into a spat
- Luckily apology kisses are an actual thing
- He also is chronically obsessed with PDA
- Whether it's the dining table, living room, school, random store, bro is in contact with you in some way
- He also considers taking you to random places as dates
- For y'all's first date he took you to a random forest and carved your initials into a tree
- And then you both got crappy gas station food and hung out at the park
- You also became manager of the band???
- You literally didn't apply for the position but you have it now
- It causes some... interesting arguments
- Rodrick is possessive, to like a goofy ah degree
- So if any of the band members are checking you out for like, any reason, he's calling them out
- or just loudly playing his drums to annoy the guy away from you
- he gives, I got that dog in me and the dog is a Chihuahua vibes
- but he's sweet with you
- He likes to just lay on your lap and let you play with his hair
- And he kisses kinda low-key bad at first, but he makes up for it with enthusiasm
- He's so happy you're with him, like incredibly happy
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- This picture is actually him on a daily basis
- Every time you show up at his house for literally any reason he gets a huge dorky smile on his face and he's just like "Yeah Greg, my partner is here"
- Greg is not amused
- But you are :)
GUYS I PROMISE I LOVE HIM AND HIS STINK IM JUST MEAN 🙏🙏🙏
Anyways make sure you eat food and drink water 🫶
#doawk rodrick#doawk#doawk greg#rodrick heffley x reader#rodrick x reader#diary of a wimpy kid rodrick#x reader#gn reader#Bisexual rodrick
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Made to Be - Extra IV
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Read Made to Be here | ~1.8k words
From me: I was just thinking about them (probs because I'm always thinking about school. This take place sometime between January and the second extra (pre-baby stuff). This is just a really quick little thing until I can write something of merit. I believe I'm almost caught up at work. I think I might be able to write something more substantial this week 💕 Thank you for being patient and kind.
Warnings: none, fluffy cute stuff.
Summary: Harry's not the only one who thinks she was made to be a teacher.
May
“I think we should outlaw field trips,” she mumbled sitting beside Harry in the front seat of the bus.
He chuckled. “It will be fun, kitten,” he assured her.
“Fun for you maybe. You got the good group of kids to chaperone.”
“I’ll give y’group a lecture before we split up, angel,” he promised. Harry snagged her hand from her lap and gave it a gentle squeeze. They tried not to be overly affectionate in front of the students because they didn’t want it to be weird...not that it was weird. But it was definitely something in their eyes. “Y’know they only gave y’a tough group because y’can handle it and they love you.”
She sighed. “I know, I know.”
They were dressed comfortably for the history museum trip. Business casual that made Harry think she was modeling for teachers in textbooks. She was so pretty it made his heart skip a beat.
She had been telling Harry how excited she was to go on the trip up until she got the names of the group she was chaperoning. She was especially excited because schools always got great discounts for museums that she generally hated to pay for. But not even the group rate was enough to make her enthusiasm spike. She fiddled nervously with her engagement ring dangling on her necklace. Harry truly outdid himself and wearing the ring on her finger in the city made her nervous so she opted for the necklace so she could tuck it away safely. (But she assured Harry the thought of taking it off made her feel naked.) Until it was tucked away, Harry smiled, self-satisfied as she twisted it on the silver chain. That pretty diamond glittering in the sun coming through the window of the bus made him so happy. The little symbol that they’d be together forever. She was made for him. He was certain.
He almost forgot he was supposed to be comforting her. It was loud behind them. Not excessive, but when forty something students chattered in an enclosed area, it always got a bit loud and also didn’t help his train of thought. “They’ll pull it together for you,” he draped an arm around her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. The kids would have to deal.
“Aw!” Someone droned. Her cheeks heated briefly but Harry turned in his seat and glared so that the sound was cut off quickly.
“Jus’ show them all y’favorite things,” he shrugged.
“My nightmare is losing a student on a trip,” she sighed. “This is so stressful.”
“They’re not little ones, m’love,” he reminded her. “They can wander a bit and they’ll be okay. S’not like they don’t all go to the mall on their own and whatnot. Plus, I’d never let y’take the fall for losing one of them. We’d find them. M’sure a lot of parents wouldn’t either. But s’not going t’happen.”
She nodded. Then she sighed heavily and squeezed his hand back. “You’re right.”
“Mm, music t’my ears,” he grinned.
“Don’t push it.”
*
But Harry was right. Her group of students who were usually a rough and tumble kind of bunch really got into the trip. At first they were quiet, almost shy. But she acted as if she didn’t notice and told them all about the exhibits they encountered and explained as much as she could. She did her best to connect the displays to their own lives so they would care more.
As such, they walked right along with her and forgot their shyness. They asked intelligent follow up questions after she explained what they were looking at. They followed all her directions and even asked her for more information about the information she told them as they walked through the rooms. She was going to boost their grades when they got back to school with bonus points for being so good and learning at the same time.
The relief was exhilarating.
About part way through the morning, her group of eight needed a bathroom break. She waited outside the bathrooms and checked her phone for any kind of emergency. Harry texted to check in on her, so she answered to let him know how good her group was and how happy she was to be on the trip again.
“School trip?”
She looked up instinctively, the lanyard around her neck was the only thing that marked her as an adult in comparison to her students. Her slightly shorter frame didn’t compare to the boys she taught who often towered over her. She thought she usually looked the part of being a teacher. She felt it was written on her face (or maybe it was the headband with the Treaty of Versailles printed on the fabric and her pencil earrings that gave it away). The man before wasn’t one of her coworkers but he had a lanyard around his neck from a school she hadn’t heard of before.
She nodded. “Oh yeah, drove an hour in,” she cleared her throat awkwardly.
“Same here. About an hour and a half. You’re a history teacher as well?” He asked.
Her students were still in the restroom, so she cleared her throat again and nodded. “Yes, World History.”
“Same here, where are you in the curriculum right now?”
“We just finished up the Industrial Revolution. About to start Imperialism.”
“Fun stuff! You know, one of my students heard you talking about the Enigma exhibit. Said I left out a ton of information that you seemed to know a lot more about.”
She chuckled. “I see, sorry about that,” she smiled politely. “I get a little too into Bletchley Park.”
“Don’t we all.”
“Miss,” one of her students said suddenly appearing from the bathroom with two others. She glanced toward the men’s bathroom but didn’t see any of them just yet. “Can we pop into the giftshop?”
She glanced at her watch. “I think we have time for that, scope it out before everyone else at the end of the day. We have lunch in about an hour.”
“Are you all eating here, in the food court?”
“I think we’re eating outside,” she said. “Nice day and all... I think the boys are coming out now,” she smiled at her student. “Nice meeting you. Enjoy the museum,” she ushered her students toward the men’s room and sighed.
“Was he hitting on you, Miss?” She whispered.
“Shh.”
“Okay, queen,” she giggled. “Are you going to tell Mr. Styles?”
“He wasn’t hitting on me.”
“Miss,” she laughed. “He was so hitting on you.”
“I didn’t—”
“Who was hitting on her?” One of the boys asked.
“No one—”
“That guy.”
“Oooh, he’s cute. Wait until Mr. Styles finds out he has competition.”
“Miss, I think we have to intimidate him,” another one of the boys explained knowingly. “It’s what Mr. Styles would want.”
“Oh, my word,” she sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Can we go to the giftshop?”
*
“Everyone please look in the seat next to you and check if the person you travelled with on the way here is still here! We’re doing a final headcount as soon as we’re all seated.”
“Mr. Styles!” One of her group members sang. She glared at him briefly with her best teacher stare before she sat facing forward in her seat. Harry squeezed her shoulder reassuringly.
“Yes? Didn’t y’torture m’fiancée enough today?”
“I would never torture her! But your fiancée got hit on by a guy by the bathroom!” He shouted.
The resounding oohs from the entire bus made her blush. She looked straight forward at the seatback in front of her. “Really?” He smiled and glanced down at the pretty girl beside him.
She shook her head. “He was not flirting.”
“Course he was, Miss! You’re a total catch!” The girl in her group called back.
“She’s right, y’know,” he winked at her knowingly, his voice was low. Maybe only one or two students heard Harry say it and they were kind enough to giggle and not make a scene of it or embarrass her further. “Alright, alright, head count!”
She stayed put while Harry walked up and down the aisle. When he returned to the front, he told the bus driver that everyone was accounted for and they could go on their way.
“Hiding your affair from me?” He winked.
“Shut up.”
He chuckled and grabbed her hand from her lap and brought her fingers to his lips briefly. “S’no surprise, really.”
“It’s probably because my ring was inside my shirt.”
“Lucky ring,” he hummed.
“Harry,” she hissed.
“The man has good taste, kitten,” he shrugged. “M’not surprised at all.”
She sighed. “I wasn’t hiding it from you. I just didn’t want to make you jealous. I don’t want you to think you have anything to be jealous of, you know?”
“I know, I know,” his voice was so kind and soft. The way he sounded when they were falling asleep. It was quiet and warm. If they weren’t in front of forty something students, he probably would have held her cheek and kissed her the way he did every night. Would have traced her features and told her how much he loved her. “You’re jus’ so pretty, so nice, so lovely that anyone with half a brain cell can see it from across the room,” he assured her. Her relief was massive. The idea of hurting Harry’s feelings or betraying his trust was one of her worst fears. She pulled the necklace from its spot and twisted it again and Harry’s smile grew. “God,” he shook his head. Then he squeezed her hand three quick times. She squeezed it back four times in succession. Both knew what it meant. A not quite secret that they loved each other.
She was always grateful for Harry coming into her life. The day she left her old school and got her new job was so scary and sad. In hindsight, she would have told herself in her first year of teaching that a new school was in her future, and she was going to meet a man that was everything she wanted and more.
Someone who was made for her.
“What?” He smirked. The sun was setting and bathing the bus in a soft golden light that only highlighted how handsome Harry was.
“Just thinking about how jealous I would be if a girl flirted with you on a field trip. You have way more kindness than I do.”
“Oh, don’t worry, kitten,” he mumbled and brought his mouth to her ear. “M’going t’show you how crazy the thought of another guy chatting y’up makes me later. Remind you that y’don’t need anyone else. Ever,” he promised and pressed a chaste kiss that did not match the intensity of his words.
Her cheeks warmed once more but she smiled. Shaking her head she squeezed his hand three more times.
--
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