#I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN TO HER CHILD AFTER HER DEATH BY GODZILLA

[adm-starblitzsteel-4305]

Our Tiamat is now a MOTHER of her offspring!

Lahamu is her child's name. 🥺💞

[rachetmath]

Favorite (Characters)

Ruby: *barges in* RatchetMath!

Me: What is it Ruby?

Ruby: You’re showing favoritism.

Me: Okay. And?

Ruby: You need to stop. Why not draw us for once?

Me: Hm, maybe because I like Jaune more. Hell I like Penny and Neo more than you or your team.

Ruby: Why?!

Me: Because your team is horrible.

Ruby: So is team JNPR!

Me: Yeah, but only because they have to follow you. They have some individuality but we don’t explore that as much. Plus, your team would be dead without them. But you know what Ruby, I would rather draw Yang, Blake or any other character except Weiss than you right now.

Ruby: What?! But I’m-

Me: The main character that barely does main character things. Woman, Salem was in Atlas! Why was she not your top priority? Why was James your problem?

Ruby: Um well…

Me: Ruby, she knows your mother! She might know what happened to her! I get Yang was some levels your mom but shouldn’t learning what happened to your actual mom be just as important? Especially after that dark memory.

Ruby: That is true.

Me: You have silver eyes but you still don’t know how to use them. There was army of grimm around Mantle and that would have been good practice. And a better solution than Ren.

Ruby: But then I be overpowered.

Me: No. Ruby your silver eyes only work on one person. If someone sneaks up on you or doesn’t care about that light you give off then, you’re dead. Maria is proof on that.

Ruby: Um..

Me: Plus, the question that everyone in the audience could have an answer to is whether your silver eyes can even work on Salem. In all honesty, it proves the writer don’t keep track of the characters and their personalities to where they fit together in story. You know what I have been making skits, trying to be funny but… the jokes died. Look guys I-I’m sorry but… let me explain.

1. Ruby and Blake should have stayed in Mantle. Why?

1. Salem is the main villian. She knows Ruby’s mother. You know the same mother who left for a mission and didn’t come back. The same mother, who Ruby knows nothing about while everyone seems to have different perspectives of her. Or has a better clue on who she is, than Ruby herself. Plus wasn’t Salem after her too? She basically would be killing two birds with one stone by kidnapping Oscar and giving Ruby a reason to see her. That way Ruby isn’t assuming what happened to her mother. Let Salem antagonize Ruby. (Question: Can silver eyes work on Salem?)

2. Perfect training for silver eyes. Let’s face it, Ren proved to us he can mask a bunch of people without Jaune’s help. All he needed was concentration. However, Ruby is more effective because silver eyes seem to be able to destroy multiple grimm on sight. And with lives on the line that gives Ruby plenty of reason to start using them.

3. Ren calling Ruby out on her issues. Look I loved how Ren was willing to tell the truth, but him revealing Jaune cheated Beacon was… weak. Reason being it relates to Jaune’s character and Ren still follows Jaune’s orders. However, Ruby, who is supposed to be a prodigy because she came to Beacon two years ahead of her class, has not proven once that she is worthy of such praise. The only reason-The ONLY reason Ruby was enrolled into Beacon was her silver eyes. Ruby even in volume one has been nothing but liability. Initiations, she almost dies from a Stinger. Stake out, she almost got run over by a truck and it ended in failure. First mission, she gets kidnapped and almost destroyed a city block. Roman, a man with no semblance or aura continues to beat her four times in a row. And it gets worse. Ruby almost got her uncle killed. She was the first to get knocked out by Emerald. Almost dies by a robot and Godzilla. And the moment she arrived in Atlas her first move was to lie to James. She didn’t even try to stop Tyrian when she saw him. She had her gun with her too. Ren is not her sister, he might as well tell her the facts so she can do better.

4.  Blake is Faunus. Mantle hates faunuses. Why not have Blake help them to prove faunuses are people too? Let Blake represent her people. I mean Velvet and Sun represent faunses more than she does her whole existence. Blake also can relate to Ren’s problem. How? Blake was a part of the White Fang, so there were expectations she had to fulfill. Especially when trying to measure up to Adam. However, she explains the longer she was in the White Fang, the more she found out how messed up and extremely bias it was. Including with Adam to the point she decided to leave. She even states she was lucky that Yang even forgave her after all the trouble she caused her. Blake challenged her bias nature, and it made her stronger for it. Blake would be basically telling Ren the more he tries to live up to someone else’s expectations, without seeing their flaws, the more he loses touch with himself and everyone around him.

5.  Oscar shouldn’t have been able break out of Salem on his own: I’m sorry but… Oscar got beat up. Took a magic beam to the chest. Had to switch between him and Ozpin and mind you he had no aura to help him. He should be tired and unable to move. (In my opinion, this kid was given too much screen time. At first I was worried about him but now I’m wondering why was I worrying at all.)

2. Jaune and Yang should have gone to Atlas.

1. Penny is basically Pyrrha in the opposite light. Penny’s special because she’s a robot with a soul, a mind of her own and an attitude to prove it. She is just as human as everyone else, but no one seems to treat her as such. James only sees her as something of a weapon. Pietro treats her like child even though she’s more mature than the rest of the female cast, except Maria. And now with maiden powers, everyone is out casting Penny even more. Jaune is perfect for her because he has experience with this kind of issue. However, he would’ve had to take different route to the situation considering his failure with Pyrrha last time they had discussion on maiden powers or responsibilities (Destiny.).

2. Jaune already has been a part of maiden business since volume three. His reason to be with Penny would be make sure she doesn’t meet the same fate as Pyrrha or Amber. Not just for himself but for others around him. Especially since Cinder was in Atlas and is willing to hunt her down for the maiden powers. And James was willing to turn Penny into a soulless machine to follow his every command. (Actually, Watts is more a fault considering he hates Pietro.). James and Cinder are also opposite to Jaune in some ways.  James earned his position and earned respect from his military. Jaune on the other hand cheated, and unlike James might not have everybody’s respect. Cinder treats her allies like tools. And with power she just consumes and gives nothing return. Jaune however treats his allies like family. And instead of just taking power he gives power to others around him. He’s the reason Cinder has maiden powers. So, him making it his personal mission to make sure Cinder doesn’t get more power only increases his resolve to protect Penny. (Especially since he already had to kill her in the canon finale.)  In other words, James and Cinder purposed a challenge to Jaune. Can he pervert history from repeating itself? Can he really protect the maiden powers? Is he truly worthy of being a huntsman? What is he willing to risk in achieving his goal? (Also let’s be clear. Hazel beat Oscar down for the password to the relic. James shot the kid and was willing to let him fall to his death. Qrow intentionally punched the kid.  I don’t care if it was for Ozpin, he still punched Oscar. Lion before even knowing Oscar was Ozpin reincarnation was already about kill him anyways. All Jaune did was push him to a wall. Yes, Jaune still would have hurt Oscar, but he didn’t. He walked away.)  

3.  A lot of the situations could’ve been avoided or mattered if Jaune was there. Don’t believe me? Well let me explain. Was Ruby the only option when sneaking pass Central Command? No, because they had Weiss, Nora and Penny. Weiss could have done a freezer burn like in her fight with Marrow. Or Nora could have thrown her grenades and Penny just shoots them before the hit the ground or damage anything. Both causing a smoke screen, so no one sees them. Plus, they were already caught by using Pietro credentials. Did Nora need to get knocked out for the team to escape? No. If she had Jaune with her they could’ve one caused an EMP wave being Jaune has gravity and Nora has lightning. Or two, if Nora still went through with it, Jaune would have healed her immediately. Penny lifting and keeping the arena in place. If Jaune and Weiss were with her then once Amity was in position, Weiss with Jaune’s assistances can keep it place so Penny can come back inside and the whole video could be played. Also, Pietro would know what was going on with his daughter and can properly explain how to fix her. (Better than Jaune healing her.)

4. Nora’s whole character is knowing who she is without Ren right? Then why not just have her lead the evacuation once she’s done with Atlas? Why not have her and Yang work together along with the happy huntress to evacuate Mantle? Especially if their friends disappeared to save Oscar. (And before ya’ll tell me they can’t do it….. Yang, blocked a punch from a mech, held off a Manticore, and has a semblance that literally lets her take damage and dish it back five times harder. Nora who literally crushed Weiss and Yang in a food fight. Knocked a giant horse down on its knee. And knocked Hazel away.  Are you seriously saying these girls are not enough to take on a few little tigers? Come on!) If the whole point of Nora’s character development was finding out more about herself then let Nora try something without Ren. Let her call the shots. Let her take charge. Give her a character. (Hell don’t stop there. Have her interact with other characters. Like Jaune. Yang. Weiss. Or anyone other character than Ren. Let them tell her what they think about her. Let Nora be a solution to a character’s struggle. Ya’ll make it sound like Nora has no friends.)

5. All Yang needed was a break from Ruby and Blake. In all honesty Yang should have been the one to see the hounds face and kill it. Why? Well Ruby is Yang’s sister and only reminder of her nonblood related mother. And Blake is her girlfriend. And if we saw the hound’s face, we know it’s not just a silver eyed person. It’s also a faunus. This will give her a reason to protect both her loved ones because by seeing the hound she knows Salem intention with Ruby and want to keep her, and Blake from meeting the same fate of being turned into monsters. Yang should’ve been the 2nd to 4th member of team RWBY to fall. Why? One, a Yang vs Neo fight. Two, Cinder and Neo both wanted Ruby dead. So why not get rid of Ruby first? The fights would have been more thrilling and seeing the character, the show is named after, presumed to be dead would have added stakes and tension to the fight. (Also let me say this. Why is it, that the only great display of the maiden powers I’ve ever seen, was from Amber and not the maidens, as of now, Winter, Raven, and Cinder? The maiden powers are basically magic right? Why isn’t Cinder using any other element than fire?)

6. Weiss was completely useless. Look, as the saying goes, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” And when it came to Weiss and family, she has little to no clue of what it is nor deserves it. Weiss should have been more of an inspiration for Whitley to do right. How? By simply talking to him. What reason would she have other than Mantle? Simple, he’s her brother and she started off like him. Beacon, she was a brat. She was arrogant. And more importantly a jerk. Blake ran because of her racist attitude. Ruby literally had to impress her to prove she can be leader. Even though Weiss is not leadership martial herself.  Plus, hearing May and how she and her family never resolved their issues should inspire Weiss to not repeat that mistake. And guess what, her mom, Willow, the drinker of the family, wasn’t wrong. Both her and Winter left Whitley alone. Klein wasn’t there for him either. All Whitley had was his father. So Weiss, actually acting like his sister and trying to help him allows him to feel less alone. Instead Weiss was complete Jacque through out the entire volume.  

And that’s all.  Look I know I should have seen this coming but I had to say it.  Volume 8 could’ve been good. The problem was.

1.       Characters are not placed well within the story.

2.       We lost track of who said characters are.

3.       The ships are in the way.

4.       Being dumb for the plot. (Sometimes it’s necessary.)

[askaceattorney]

Dear Anonymous,

Fine, whatever.

I honestly wasn’t sure what to make of this little punk the first time I saw him.  He looked like your average aloof, unhappy young schoolboy with a general look of “whatever” on his face...and GLOWING HORNS!?

...which he uses to communicate with a Godzilla knockoff!?

The movie critic in me want to say something here, but...I’m kind of at a loss for words.  Guess I’ll let the CinemaSins folks deal with that one.

Even odder is the fact that this crazy plot is introduced just after one Miles Edgeworth makes the decision to relinquish his badge in order to save a close friend.  Not to mention he got a surprise call from an old acquaintance.

Apparently, the writers didn’t think that was suspenseful enough, so they decided to have a giant monster attack the town.  Why in the--?

...Yeah, I know it's just a movie.  That would’ve been one hilarious plot twist, though, come to think of it.

The supposed evidence of this attack is what brings former Prosecutor Edgeworth and his friends to the studio where the one and only John Marsh does his thing.  What is his thing, exactly?  According to Judge Courtney...

Sadly, like many famous movie stars, he’s not all that exciting (or pleasant) in person, as we discover when Edgeworth and company first meet him.

We learn two things about him right off the bat -- he’s a bratty kid with few manners, and...he drinks a lot of milk, apparently.

One has to wonder if he actually likes it that much, or if he hopes to get bigger and taller by drinking it.  He’s apparently quite sensitive about his small stature, after all.

Despite being so small, however, he’s remarkably gutsy around adults.

Perhaps that’s something he gets from his father?

Aside from his guts and his fame, he doesn’t seem all that interesting, and doesn’t seem to have much to do with the murder of Zheng Fa’s President.  But, if the Ace Attorney series has taught us anything, it’s that looks can be deceiving.  The first thing we learn about him is both unexpected and...kind of hilarious.

The idea of a bratty kid like John being the son of the prim and proper Justine Courtney is just crazy enough to make you wonder if one of the writers thought, “Yeah...  That’ll be the last thing they expect!”  (And boy, were they right.)

It gets even better when we actually see them together, though.

It turns out the young rebel does have some respect for at least one authority figure -- his foster mother.  Of course, when your mom has a gavel, a majestic-looking robe, and (presumably) a British accent, you’d have to be pretty foolish to disrespect her.  And as every child knows, when your mom says your full name, that’s code for “You’re in big trouble.”  Luckily, he’s smart enough to understand that much.

I believe I speak for a lot of people when I say I love how refreshing this moment is after all his smugness.

So, to sum up his personality, John Marsh is a talented kid, but not too pleasant to be around...unless his mom’s there.  So, what about his involvement in the story?

He doesn’t seem to play much of a part in it until Shi-Long Lang makes an intriguing discovery.

The President of Zheng Fa apparently died on the same night John was rehearsing his lines for the Moozilla movie...and in roughly the same place.  Coincidence?  As already mentioned, John isn’t the nicest guy, but could he really have it in him to murder a foreign dignitary?  That sounds pretty far-fetched, even for Ace Attorney.

After some of Edgeworth’s deducing, we eventually learn the truth of the matter, which, while tragic, isn’t quite as horrible as that.

John’s reluctance to tell the truth about what happened is actually quite understandable -- according to him, the President’s death was the result of his own negligence.

One can only imagine what it must be like to be responsible for a foreign President’s death simply by forgetting to turn something off.  Accidents happen, of course, but it would still be enough to make anyone panic, especially someone so young.  On top of that, he has no explanation for why the President was there in the first place, which makes things even more suspicious.

Luckily for him, he has a perceptive prosecutor there to uncover the whole truth.

A bouquet of Lion Lilies had been given to the President before his death, leaving some pollen on his suit when he was supposedly crushed by Moozilla’s head, but John felt the need to remove the crushed flowers from the scene for some reason.  It’s here that we finally get a glimpse of his caring side.

Even if he won’t admit it, John cared enough about his mom to want to remove the evidence that would point to her being the President’s killer, event it meant casting suspicion on himself.  Could he have simply done that out of panic, was it done as an act of love, or was it a mixture of both?  We can only speculate on that, but I like to imagine his love for his mom was the bigger motivation for him.

If you say so, John.

Luck is on his side again when Edgeworth’s investigation leads him to a different culprit.

Thus the attention and suspicion are finally taken away from John, and he goes back to being (ironically) a background character.  But then, with help from Franziska, Sebastian, Kay, and Little Thief, an even more earth-shattering truth is unearthed:

I don’t see the resemblance, but I’m not one to doubt Judge Courtney’s word.  Through some crazy twist of fate, John’s biological mother, Amy, became a diplomat in Zheng Fa, met President Huang, and...well, you know the rest.  Despite whatever feelings John has upon hearing this news, he shows some courage at this point in the story and decides to hear the whole truth.

Then, when proof positive arrives that he was, in fact, the President’s son, the knowledge of this combined with the President’s death -- which, for all he knew, was caused by John’s negligence -- and the fact that he didn’t even bother to tell him who he was, is finally too big a burden for him to handle.

Thank goodness there are mothers out there who know when and how to provide comfort.

But then, after some more deducing from Edgeworth, the past comes back to haunt everyone...including John.

It turns out the one responsible for killing the President -- the real President -- has been lurking in the shadows all along.  Not surprisingly, John’s reaction to finding him isn’t very different from the way Kay reacted after finding her father’s killer.

Now we’re faced with the same question from before -- does John have it in him to kill someone?

That thought is put on hold until Edgeworth unmasks the mastermind behind the fake President’s murder.  Interestingly enough, both he and John grew up without knowing who their fathers were.

Unlike Simon, however, John isn’t satisfied to forget or ignore or what happened to his father.  And then, the moment of truth occurs...

John is suddenly given the opportunity to not only see his father’s killer face-to-face, but to avenge his death right then and there.

Such a temptation would be hard to resist for any grown adult, let alone a child.  Not to mention there’s a clown there who describes revenge to him in a positive light.

But whether it’s because of his mother’s wisdom, his father’s noble heart, or just some calm, rational thinking on his part (or perhaps a combination of the three), John displays enough character to look at the situation differently.

Sure, John may be a jerk and a brat at times, but when it comes right down to it, he has the one thing no average criminal has or understands: the incredible ability to consider how his actions might affect others.  Rather than thinking about what he might get from carrying out revenge, he instead considers how his mom, his friends, and his numerous fans might feel if he resorted to murder.

On top of this, he displays something else that sets him apart from a criminal -- the ability to resist taking justice into his own hands.

I don’t know about you, but my reaction to hearing this little punk say that was a lot like Kay’s:

Once again, thank heaven for mothers like Justine Courtney.  She obviously taught him what it means to live justly, even in the face of overwhelming emotion.

So, for such a minor-seeming character, John ends up showing some of the greatest character development in the game, as well as the same courage and strength as his late father.  Speaking of which, he even decides to do something in memory of his father, whom he never had the chance to meet.

It’s always wonderful to see someone who rarely shows emotion doing something out of love, isn’t it?  It just goes to show that you can’t judge someone -- whether they’re a little punk or not -- by appearances.

-The Co-Mod

P. S. I’ve got a few more essays to complete before I can get to Shi-Long Lang, but he’s on my list, so hang tight!  In the meantime, Mod Edgeworth has some things to say about...

KAY FARADAY

In every Ace Attorney game, every Protagonist always has to have an assistant or a Maya. Even while the later games did change the focus to be on a trio, each case always narrows down to two specific individuals working together on a single case together. One leads the trial, who is the character you played as, and the other one is your assistant. The only acceptation to this, of course, was the last part of Turnabout for Tomorrow where Phoenix led the case, Apollo was the assistant and Athena was the Defendant/Assistant number 2. Never mind that most real trials can have as many as five co-councils working on a single case from the Defense and Prosecution, but whatever. I suppose you can allow your suspension of disbelief.

In the case of Miles Edgeworth Investigations, the main protagonist, Miles Edgeworth, is often working with a single partner named Kay Faraday. From the beginning, the game makes hilarious excuses for why Miles Edgeworth needs to work with Kay and not Dick Gumshoe. Even Kay herself makes it blatantly clear that she is stealing Dick Gumshoe’s role as the assistant/sidekick before he gets dragged away from Miles Edgeworth by Shi Long Lang’s men.

To understand Kay Faraday’s role in Miles Edgeworth’s life, we first need to define what it takes to be considered an assistant to the main protagonist or Miles Edgeworth’s Maya so to speak. In the Ace Attorney trilogy, Maya represented the lancer and heart of Phoenix Wright’s life. 

(Both images from tvtropes.org)

She’s helped him in almost all of his cases with only four that she didn’t work with him on.  In many ways, Maya is Phoenix’s loyal partner and someone that brightens his life. Understand that a majority of Phoenix’s work includes paperwork, investigating and court trials. Not exactly something to be excited about. I’ve never been to a trial, but I have had visited a courthouse with my mom when she was sending in paperwork for her divorce. If you thought being in a waiting room for a doctor’s appointment or the likes was boring, going to a courtroom to see a judge is ten times more boring. Having the assistant for the main character is a great way of bringing life to the main protagonist when he needs it.

What makes Kay the most unique as Miles Edgeworth’s assistant is the fact she is more chaotic than the other assistants. Maya Fey was certainly trollish and Trucy can bring a bit of chaos, but neither ever ran off randomly, dawned themselves as criminals of justice or were as dedicated to bringing justice in the most unorthodox way. In many ways, much like Maya is for Phoenix and Trucy is for Apollo, Kay represents everything Miles Edgeworth needs in his life. Just like Maya is for Phoenix and Trucy is for Apollo, Kay parallels Miles Edgeworth’s past and what he needs to strive for.

The first time Miles Edgeworth met Kay Faraday, he was with his mentor and getting ready to take over in Byrne Faraday’s place as Prosecutor due to allegations against Byrne Faraday as the Yatagarasu, a noble thief who steals the truth, then releases it to the public. Kay Faraday politely asks a young Miles Edgeworth to exchange her coins for a dollar. Later on, when the trial is about to start, it turns out that both the Defendant and Byrne Faraday were murdered. Through investigation, both young Miles Edgeworth and a young Franziska Von Karma are able to conclude that this double murder was made by a third party.

At first, it’s suspected that Dick Gumshoe was the one responsible for the murder. With teamwork from young Miles Edgeworth and young Franziska Von Karma, they were able to prove that Dick Gumshoe had a mysterious alibi in the form of Kay Faraday. Realizing she had truly lost her father, this touches the young Miles Edgeworth in the most personal way. He too had lost his father at a very young age and blamed himself for it, even during this time. Unlike Miles Edgeworth, though, Kay had found someone that understood and sympathized with her pain and suffering. What many people seem to miss, however, is how even this young Kay might’ve blamed herself in the same way Miles Edgeworth blamed himself for his father’s death. 

Kay’s father was literally murdered in the next room literally next to her. She likely was with her father before, then took off to buy a little snack for her and her father. If you can also recall all the promises she made in her Promise Notebook, she had technically broke two of those rules. One was that she would not except gifts from strangers, yet she accepted a dollar from Miles Edgeworth and technically a snack from Dick Gumshoe. The second is that she would not go anywhere with strangers, yet sat and ate with Dick Gumshoe. Thanks to those two rules being broken, Kay never returned to her father or was there when her father was murdered. It’s possible that, in Kay’s mind, she truly believed her father would still be alive and Dick Gumshoe would not have been blamed or covered for her had she not left her father’s side or broken any of the rules.

Now, most people would likely say, “but Kay isn’t anything like Miles Edgeworth. She doesn’t self deprecate or blame herself for things she cannot control,” except that’s exactly what she did in The Forgotten Turnabout when she lost her memories. People with amnesia do not just change into self-shaming people. It’s like erasing your computer into its factory/default settings. The computer erases all information to its basic format and this is exactly what happened to Kay Faraday in The Forgotten Turnabout. Her default personality is someone that constantly blames herself for things she does not know or can control. This girl went so far as to believe she truly murdered someone, because she was there when it happened. Hm… remind you of another character, who also thought he murdered someone because he was there when it happened? I don’t know. Sounds a bit similar, if you ask me.

To continue on, young Kay is given young Miles Edgeworth’s cravat, who then promises to return it. From there, Miles Edgeworth exposes the real killer of Kay’s father, Calisto Yew, before she runs off. Kay returns many years later in order to help Miles Edgeworth and find justice for her father. This feels familiar in how Phoenix Wright also helped Maya Fey find justice for her sister’s killer or how Apollo Justice helped Trucy Wright find justice for her father’s killer. Kay considers Miles Edgeworth a hero for helping her expose her father’s killer, before eventually putting her to justice.

Kay returns in the second game where she attempts to look for a Yatagarasu Team of her own, while helping Miles Edgeworth with his investigations. Returning back to The Forgotten Turnabout, we learn a hidden side to Kay Faraday people tend to brush off as her being amnestic. The truth is, Kay’s amnesic personality shows a greater depth to her than people realize. It is when she loses her memories that we see that she is more fragile, self-deprecating and self-conscious about herself. These are the most noticeable traits to Miles Edgeworth that he often hides with his stoicism. This stoic personality to Miles Edgeworth is the upbeat, chaotic side to Kay. Just like how Miles Edgeworth often uses his stoic, smug personality to mask his fragile, self-deprecation and self-conscious part of himself, the same can also be how Kay uses her upbeat, chaotic personality to hide the very same parts of herself.

(Found image here)

Losing a parent was never something that came without traumatic consequences in Ace Attorney, especially to children. Athena losing her mother resulted in losing memory, having phobias towards courtrooms – something I suspect might be a form of Agoraphobia and having fractured relationships towards the Blackquill siblings. Athena also had believed she may’ve killed her own mother as a young child. Trucy Wright losing her parents caused her to believe that she wasn’t allowed to show any form of sadness or anger. Apollo having lost his father as an infant caused him to have abandonment and trust issues almost all of his life to the point of quickly turning against colleagues at the flip of a dime the moment he suspects either one have committed some sort of crime (Kristoph Gavin, Phoenix Wright for a short time and Athena Cykes). Why should Kay Faraday be left out of being traumatized by the murder of her own father, especially if she was a child and was literally next door when it happened? Why wouldn’t Kay Faraday blame herself for her father’s murder when we have two other characters placed under suspicion of murdering their parents? Even while one could argue Trucy never had issues as severe as Miles Edgeworth or Athena Cykes, it’s likely because she still had Phoenix as her adopted father to help her through her trauma. Even Apollo had a Foster Father during most of his childhood. Kay never had any adopted or foster father.

Many have questioned and speculated if Kay Faraday sees Miles Edgeworth as her father. I wouldn’t put that out of the realm of possibilities, but I’d like to say that is up for interpretation. What I can say about their relationship is that they have connected much quicker than most other characters. Even with Maya, Phoenix didn’t completely connect with her for about a year. Phoenix told Maya he trusted Larry and Edgeworth, two of his childhood friends, more than anyone else, even Maya (Ouch!). Apollo did connect with Trucy pretty quickly, but they weren’t really open with each other for a few years. It wasn’t until Spirit of Justice when Trucy truly opened up to Apollo. While Miles Edgeworth is most certainly not as open with Kay as he is with Phoenix Wright, it’s clear there was a great deal of chemistry and trust that developed in the span in less than two months.

(Image from here)

It’s this great deal of trust Kay has with Miles Edgeworth that she decides to make him and Dick Gumshoe her new Yatagarasu team. Many people often make this new Yatagarasu to include Ema Skye, Franziska Von Karma and/or Sebastian Debeste and, while I do respect that team, I find it to be better that it’s Dick Gumshoe and Miles Edgeworth. Most would consider this to be the same as the previous Yatagarasu, but I have to disagree with that. The only thing both teams would have in common is that they have a Prosecutor and Detective, perhaps a future Defense Attorney if Kay was to go that route. They still have different personalities from the original Yatagarasu, would perform their jobs differently and would go up against a different evil corruption in the higher ups. The first Yatagarasu would go up against the Smuggling Ring, whereas the second would likely go against the Dark Age of the Law and the corruption in the PIC and Bar Association. Why? Well….

With Kay Faraday, I have seen a previous essay on her, but I feel that there is so much more to her than what was put on before. She’s one of the only assistant characters that I feel parallels the protagonist the closest. I found this fanart. I will link to where I found this here, but this expresses their relationship as a whole.

Kay Faraday is one of the only characters in Miles Edgeworth’s life that can truly relate to him on a deeper level. She’s Miles Edgeworth’s support and someone that Miles Edgeworth would likely run across a burning bridge for. Technically, he did…

Sorta. It still counts!

That’s my take on Kay Faraday. She truly is my best girl. I may do other Character Essays in the future, but I thought I’d give this one a go. We have another request on Shi Long Lang, so do expect an essay of him to be made in the future.

-Mod Edgeworth

[hopeatermeetsgodzilla]

Chapter 22

“Anguirus?” He snapped out of his trance, turning toward Mothra. Her wings were still open behind her, patterns glowing green as she absorbed energy. “Is everything alright? You’ve been awake for very long.”

He nodded. “Yeah, don’t worry. I just.. I wanna be there when he wakes up for real.”

Mothra sighed softly, turning toward her sleeping mate. Godzilla’s hair had switched from almost black to a dark, dull blue, and he was emitting his own light, even if it was much softer than her own. Not on the verge of dying anymore, stable even, but certainly not ready to fight.

“You should do like my brother.” Mothra told him, the two turning their head toward the rocky ceiling. Battra was hanging upside-down here, wings draped around him as he slept. “Rest, and conserve your energy.”

“I know I should, but...” Anguirus sighed. “Each time I lay down, I can’t help but think of all the good times I had with him. We’ve been friends for so long, I can barely remember a time when we weren’t... I don’t want to imagine what would happen if he actually did die.”

Mothra frowned sympathetically. Anguirus really was Godzilla’s oldest friend, wasn’t he? “Maybe talking about it would make you feel better?” She proposed.

Anguirus thought for a moment. “I mean, starting off, him dying from something we don’t know the source of is... pretty worrying? Especially when we look at everything else he survived: Ghidorah, Battra, Baragon, a shit-ton of Beetles, Manda pre-sinking of Mu, Ebirah-”

“You?” Mothra asked with a lilt in her voice. Anguirus couldn’t help but laugh at that.

“Yeah, me! And you too!” He noted. “I mean, he just came on my island one day, started screaming at the top of his lungs, and started wrecking shit up. What was I supposed to do, not fight him to the death?”

Mothra laughed. “He never was good at negotiations, was he? During his quest to become King, he decided that the best way to make me come out to give him the Trial of Death was to deliberately provoke me.”

“At least, he had a reason for you! For me, he just wanted to kick someone’s ass because his sisters were teasing him!” Both laughed for a moment, before calming down. “Who else did he survive... ?”

“... Rodan.” Mothra muttered under her breath. “Dear Terra, Rodan-”

Anguirus chuckled. “Yeah, that checks out. Rodan’s temper is even worse than his, would make sense the two would fight. He just takes longer to blow up.”

“No, you don’t get it- when Ghidorah was busy sinking Atlantis, Rodan was busy fighting Godzilla. When I found them, the two kept throwing a rock at each other- Rodan with his head- and I had to tie them up with silk so they would listen. The reason I sought them out is because at this point, they were the only ones who survived an encounter with Ghidorah in the past.”

“What were their reaction.”

“Rodan didn’t give a shit. Apparently, he thought that humans dying out would be a good thing because, and I quote, ‘they’re always mean to me’.” She snapped, Anguirus bursting into laughter. “And Godzilla agreed! Even after Rodan dropped him crotch-first into a tree!” The laughing doubled, Mothra joining in this time. “I mean... I was eventually able to convince them, and you know the rest.”

Anguirus nodded. “Five fucking centuries we spent before we successfully sealed those fuckers away. And now, they’re free again, Godzilla’s dying, and Rodan won’t talk to us.”

Mothra frowned at that. “Don’t worry. We’ll find a way again.”

“I know, it’s just...” He sighed, closing his eyes and turning away. “I can’t help but wonder when it all went wrong.”

-

Rodan stared up at the sky, thoughts circling in his head at a frantic pace. He knew Ghidorah were not good people. They came down from the sky to destroy their world, starting with the king that came before Godzilla, shortly followed by his father, and all of the pretenders to the throne. They liked causing storms that wiped away everything under them for... what? Proving they could? Practice? Entertainment?

They were selfish monsters who only cared about themselves, and everything else was to be destroyed for mild amusement. He knew all that. But if that was the case, then why were they being so kind to him?

Why was Ichi doing his hair for no reason and cuddling him and dancing with him and giving him compliments?

Why was Ni constantly bringing him gifts and food and trying to be less of a sharp weapon for his brothers to yield?

Why was San always so happy to see him and so patient and understanding when he messed up?

Surely, it must have been some kind of trick. Make him lower his guard so he’ll let them out. But they not being the reason why Mara had died, San opening up about his own past wounds, Ni making himself so vulnerable when he was teaching him sign words, still kept him questioning what their intentions were here.

The fact that he was currently being cuddled by all three was not helping with his internal questioning.

He tried to get up, doing his best not to shake them awake, but immediately stopped as he heard San stir. Red eyes blink open in the darkness, locking onto him. “What are you doing?” He asked, a lilt to his voice indicating playfulness.

Before he could think of what to say, he opened his mouth and asked the question that pretty much summed up all of his current worries. “Why are you three being so nice to me?”

San blinked in confusion, tilting his head. “Because we like having you around- sorry, I don’t think I understand your question.”

Rodan laughed bitterly. “Oh please. Literally the only thing you three care about is yourselves.”

San frowned. “When did we ever give this impression?”

“Oh boy, where to start?” Rodan exclaimed, starting to remember acutely the things Ghidorah did in his presence, before all four of them were trapped on Mara. “Ichi thinks he stands at the top of everything, and that whatever doesn’t bend their back forward at the sight of him needs to be destroyed.”

(Godzilla, staring into nothing, expressing doubt of being able to become King for the first time since the beginning on his campaign as he tells his friends how his father died while showing them a wound that would’ve killed him had it striked just a bit more to the left-)

“Or how about Ni jumping anyone who so much as threatens you three? Godzilla and everyone who’s ever met him are convinced that he lives to inflict physical pain.”

(Shrieking laughter echoing as Mothra was punched by lightning again and again in her child form, almost killing her permanently but that clearly didn’t matter as much to Ghidorah as making her cry out for help and in pain-)

“And as for you...” Rodan said nothing after that. Just clutched at the wound on his chest San had inflicted millenias ago, suddenly very aware of the acute pain here. The first time he had been alone with the three of them...

(Come back when you’re worth looking at.)

“You like hurting people too. Not like Ni does, but you do. Your words...” He took a short breath through his teeth. “Your words cut, and they cut deep.”

“Which is why you don’t want to hear the truth.” San suddenly said. All emotions were gone from his voice as big red eyes stared at Rodan, almost burning in the dark.

Rodan withheld it, narrowing his own eyes. “Don’t tell me what I want. The only person who can say what I want is me. Answer my question, San.”

“... We want you to let us out, so we’re being nice.” He admitted, voice still devoid of emotions. “That’s the main reason.”

Rodan frowned. “You guys do realize I’m not gonna let that happen, right? The only reason why I’m around you three is to not go insane mad from loneliness, you said it yourself. Being nice to me isn’t going to convince me you’re actually nice.” Better not mention how much their kindness had shaken him.

“But it’ll make you lower your guard. Tell us things about yourself that you normally wouldn’t tell a soul. And then, once we’ve emptied you of all your secrets, we’d be able to destroy what’s left with an off-hand comment. And that’s when you’d let us out.” There was silence for a moment, before a shaky sound emerged from Rodan. San frowned as he recognized what it was. Laughter. “Why are you laughing?”

Rodan gradually stopped. “Should’ve seen this coming.” Steam clouded his vision as he blinked. “Of course the only moment you deem me worth looking at is when you want to break me.”

“What? No!” San exclaimed, Rodan sending him a skeptical look. “I mean, at first, but things have changed since then! We... we like having you around.” He admitted. “You... you’re like the brightest, biggest, hottest star in the universe, and your presence alone beckons us to get closer and closer, regardless of the risk of getting burnt, just for the chance to bask into your light.”

“... what the fuck are you talking about?”

“What I’m trying to say is...” San grabbed Rodan’s hand, his face warming up at that. “We actually like having you around. You’re like a beacon, and we don’t want to lose sight of you.”

Rodan shook his head curtly, tugging his hand away from San’s as the blush on his face lessened. “Why should I believe you!? You literally just admitted to trying to mentally break me in order to make me a slave!”

“True. We’ve snuffed out bigger flames than yours before.” San admitted. “But none were ever as bright as you. We don’t want to snuff you out anymore: we want you to be our lantern!... you know what a lantern is, right?”

Rodan hesitantly nodded. “Like a torch, but smaller?”

San nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, they’re pretty similar! To be honest, I don’t think we’d be able to snuff you out, no matter what we try. Next best thing is feeding your flame and having you light the way to our conquest.” Rodan frowned in confusion at that.

“I thought you wanted to kill the planet?”

San giggled. “What, did one of the Moths tell you that?” 

Rodan nodded hesitantly. “Yeah, Mothra did.”

“Come on, firebird. We’re not going to destroy the planet we’re hiding on! That would be very stupid. We just want to adapt it to our needs, and, uh...” he hissed through gritted teeth. “We can’t really help it if all humans are gonna die. Beside, we can’t control something if we destroy it at the first opportunity.”

Rodan sighed, closing his eyes and turning away from San. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense...”

“You want to know what we were going to tell you?” San asked in a low voice. “What we thought would break you before you showed us nothing can?” Rodan frowned, but nodded nonetheless, convinced nothing Ghidorah could tell him would make him change his mind. Oh, how wrong he was. “We’re not the ones who killed your island and your friend.”

“Yeah, I figured out you didn’t destroy my island, it’s why I’m so confused- wait. You guys didn’t kill Godzilla?” He asked, filled with confusion. San nodded. “But... you three hate him.”

“Exactly. If we had killed him, Ni would’ve swam after his corpse to take his head as a trophy.” San told him, Rodan humming in answer. “The ones who killed them... are humans.”

“What!?” He exclaimed, somehow sitting up in surprise without waking Ichi up. “But how- humans are so tiny-”

“Do you remember what I told you, back in the soul realm?” San asked, blinking slowly. “Weaker beings fear what they don’t understand. If you don’t understand how you cheated death, how are beings as puny as humans supposed to understand anything about you, let alone your people?”

Rodan had nothing to say to that. Especially since he knew exactly what San was talking about. Humans that were both very brave and very stupid, usually the ones that could not Hear them,  “I- but how did they-?”

“With machines.” The only answer to that was an incredibly confused frown. “Look, for now, go back to sleep, okay?” San asked, putting a hand on Rodan’s shoulder and forcing him to lay back down. As he was about to retort, Ghidorah gently shushed him. “We’ll give you proof in the morning.”

-

[Telling him what we’re doing was a really stupid move.]

(I know. But his main problem with us until now is that he thought we killed one of his friends and his nest. He now knows we didn’t, and is questioning whether or not we actually want to destroy the planet. I took a calculated risk.)

{And you’re better at math than I remember you being. The biggest setback with this change is that we’ll have to wait longer before enveloping the planet in a storm for good, make an active effort in keeping it alive... Until our dear fire bird dies, that is.}

[Oh... I suppose we could wait just a few more millenias before leaving. I mean, we’ve already stayed on this planet for... what, forty thousand years?]

(Around that, yeah! And uh... I don’t know about you two, but I think I want Rodan to stay around for as long as possible.)

{Seconded, actually. He’s entertaining. Having him as an enraged flag bearer will be interesting.}

[You two should be more careful. You’ll end up getting attached and thinking you owe him something.]

{You’re the one getting language lessons from him. If one of us is going to end thinking they owe fire bird something, it’s you.}

[What-]

(~ Ni owes Rodan ~ Ni owes Rodan ~ Ni owes Ro-)

[I don’t owe him shit!]

{Are you protesting us waiting until he dies a death unrelated to us, then?}

[... No.]

{Then it’s settled. Rodan shall be kept alive, and act as our champion.}

[duhragonball]

Dragon Ball Z 280

World is fuck, so I’m gonna write about DBZ for a while until the Benadryl kicks in.

Last time, Goku fought Majin Buu, but he wasn’t doing so great, so he upped the ante by going Super Saiyan 3.   

This is where I regret falling behind on the manga way back in the Red Ribbon Army Saga, because the Buu arc is where the anime and the manga really start to get off-track from each other.   I mean, the same plot points are followed, but in the manga, Goku fights Buu as a Super Saiyan 3 the whole time, while in the anime, he starts at SSJ2 and ramps up to SSJ3... twice.    So it’s kind of hard to match up exactly which parts of the anime version are direct adaptations of the manga.   They’re probably all there, but I’d really need to do a side-by-side comparison.    A project for another time.

This has gotta be one of the best damn episodes of the whole shebang.   Goku and Kid Buu are just whalin’ on each other, and this isn’t even the climax of this arc.  

Starting out, Goku deals some pretty heavy damage to Buu, and he has some difficulty reassembling himself.  But that’s about all Goku ever does to the kid.   I mean, if Perfect Cell took a hit like that, he’d just be dead, or so badly wounded that it would take barely any follow-through to finish the job.  But with Majin Buu these kinds of enormous blasts are just chip damage at best. 

Something else I want to do one of these days is go back and try to figure out when they screwed up Dende’s Buu-Saga character model.   I think most of Dragon Ball Super depicts him as a child, as if he never aged after the Cell Games, but I think that only happened because they were screwing him up as far back as 1995.  

Here’s the thing, though: Why was Dende so short in the Cell Games?  He had aged four years from however old he was in the Namek Saga.    Piccolo Junior was fully grown by age three.   Maybe this is the Namekian life cycle.    You grow into an adult when you’re three, then you turn into a kid again, then you grow into an adolescent about 11 years after that, and then you just sort of switch back and forth for a while.   It’s a good thing Piccolo’s off-screen for most of his life.

Yamcha and Krillin are watching this from the Grand Kai Planet, courtesy of King Kai’s telepathic vision.   Why isn’t anyone else grabbing a Kai by the back?  

And they’re even screening this fight in Hell, which seems kind of strange to me.   Abandon all hope, ye who enter here, but we’ve got pay-per-view in the commons.

Hey look it’s Cell!   And Dr. Gero.  You think they talk much at all?   Think about how much it must suck for them.   Gero was maybe the only other person Cell ever respected, because he trusted Gero’s grand design for him as the perfect being.    And Gero must have viewed Cell as his ultimate hope for avenging the Red Ribbon Army.  And then they bump into each other in hell, which proves that they’re both failures.  All Cell really accomplished was to kill Goku, and now he’s not even dead anymore.  I have to figure Cell/Gero interactions in Hell are pretty uncomfortable.  At the same time, who else are they going to hang out with?

Why are all these guys still in their bodies?   Everything that happened to Vegeta in this arc implies that letting Vegeta have his body after death is a big deviation from the norm.   Episode 195 introduced the idea of DBZ’s hell being like this big Arkham Asylum for all the bad guys.   I guess technically all those episodes with the dead Ginyus in the Frieza Saga did the same thing, but you could argue that they hadn’t been dead long enough to lose their bodies.   Here, now, we’re looking at characters that have been dead for over seven years.   I think the premise in Resurrection F was that the damned get to keep their bodies while they suffer, until they finally learn to let go of their past lives and move on.  And I can see why Frieza’s such a bitter fuck that he’d still be holding on for over a decade, but what’s Recoome holding out for?   Just get reincarnated as a cockroach or something and get it over with.

Also, why is Gero a cyborg in this scene?  

And why isn’t Frieza a cyborg?   I mean, he wasn’t a cyborg in Episode 195 either, but that seemed to suggest Gero would be fully human in hell, and he isn’t.    And if Gero does get to keep being a cyborg, then why couldn’t he keep his hat?  

Anyway, Goz and Mez recognize Goku as the guy who messed with them way back in the Saiyans Saga.    Hey, why aren’t Raditz and Nappa in this scene?  I watched an AMV where they edited Bardock into this, which seems like a good idea.   Did they just not go to hell?    I find that a little hard to believe.

Anyway, all the bad guys are salty as fuck to see Goku alive and fighting, and Frieza’s actively rooting against him.  He’s just jealous because Buu’s doing better against Goku that he ever could.

Meanwhile, over on the classy side of the villain crowd, Cell wonders who Goku’s opponent is, since he’s clearly impressed to see anyone give Goku a tougher battle than himself. 

Then Babidi shows up and announces to everyone he used to be tight with Majin Buu.  Actually, he claims Buu was his servant, and that he taught him how to fight, which... yeah.   I guess he did help Buu practice punching people’s faces off.  

This whole moment feels a bit contrived.    Babidi’s been down here for a couple of days already.    I don’t know how long they’ve been watching this fight.  I would imagine the oni switched it on somewhere when Vegito was on deck, so it kind of feels like Babidi was sort of hiding around back, waiting for someone to ask about Buu, so he could jump out and go “Oh, funny you should ask about that!   I was Majin Buu’s master for like six hours, nbd.”    I almost wonder if he paid Cell five bucks just to set this up.   Cell demanded payment in singles, because he wanted to spend it on the vending machine.   He’s a sucker, though, because hell may have a big screen TV, but the bill changer on their vending machine hasn’t worked in 10 million years.

Anyway, everyone’s impressed, probably just because Babidi has the inside track on Buu more than anything.    You gotta figure most of these guys have heard it all before, and at least Babidi has a newer story to tell.   Everyone’s probably sick of hearing how Frieza ate that crab while he killed Vegeta.

But then Babidi wanders off, and in private he cusses out Buu for, you know, killing him, and he roots for Goku to win.   Wait, is Bibidi in hell too?   You’d think they could catch up on old times.

Meanwhile... well, this shot had pink and yellow energy trails moving across the planet, and it looks pretty cool, but this screenshot doesn’t quite do it justice.   

Kibitoshin is worried about their planet, but the Elder Kai insists that it’ll take more than this to wreck it.   I want a woman who believes in me the way the Elder Kai believes in the sturdiness of the Supreme Kai Planet.    That sounds kind of masochistic when I put it that way.    Moving on.

Writing about all those other villains, it starts to come into focus how little I have to say about Majin Buu.    I dig the guy, though.   Critics complain that he doesn’t have much on personality or motivation, and they’re not wrong, but I think that’s part of the point with him.    Godzilla doesn’t give touching speeches in his movies, but he remains a popular character because of the sheer spectacle of him.   He’s a force of nature, a symbol of immense power that the human characters can barely comprehend. 

In Buu’s case, he’s just this stubborn, impossible obstacle to peace in the universe.   So much has gone wrong, and we could wish it all back the way it was, if only someone could beat this pink little turd.  He’s got some personality, but his main purpose in this story is to just be there for the other characters to interact as they deal with the problem.

For example, while all this action is going on, Mr. Satan is basically helpless, but he reassures Bee that he’ll protect him, even though Satan thinks this whole adventure is a dream.   This says a lot about Mr. Satan.    Yeah, Bee had a big part in reforming the Fat Majin Buu, but he means a lot to Mr. Satan as well.   It’s easy to write off Satan as a coward and a fraud, but even when he’s retreating into denial, he still wants to be a hero, even when the rest of the world is dead, even when his only audience is a little puppy.   And you could have a moment like this with Mr. Satan regardless of the villain, but I think it stands out better when the bad guy is Kid Buu, who doesn’t get in the way with any big speeches or characterization moments of his own.

Back to the fight, Buu gets the drop on Goku, so he decides that this is no time to hold back...

So he drops a Super Saiyan 3 Kamehameha on the little creep.  Yeah!

It blows Buu to pieces, but then the pieces just turn into mini-Buus and they all shoot back.

Goku tries to power up for another round, but suddenly he runs out of gas and collapses.

So Vegeta rushes to his side and offers to switch in.   Yeah, this whole part is filler.   In the manga, Vegeta only gets one turn, and this ain’t it.   

However, I think some of Vegeta’s lines during this scene are lifted from the part of the manga where he fights Kid Buu later.    So it’s a little weird here.  I’m curious how Dragon Ball Kai handled these episodes, because when they started that project it seemed like their goal was to edit out most of the filler from the original DBZ anime, but in some cases that just isn’t practical.   Like Pizza and her entourage in the Cell Games.   They weren’t in the manga, but they appear in almost every Mr. Satan scene that was in the manga, so Kai had to leave them in, because the alternative was to painstakingly edit them out of every shot.  Here, you may not even have that option.    You could edit Goku vs. Kid Buu down to just one uninterrupted string of action where he’s fighting at Super Saiyan 3.   Cut out this intermission with Vegeta, cut out the opening bit where Goku fights at SSJ2, but I don’t know if the fight choreography would still make sense.    

Everyone watching is horrified that Vegeta can’t even land a blow, and Buu starts openly mocking his lackluster performance.   What I don’t understand is why Vegeta would even try to fight Majin Buu in his base form.   I mean, the real reason is probably because this fight is filler, and Toei didn’t want it to detract from when he actually fights Buu in the next episode.    But it makes Vegeta look kind of stupid.   He knows better, and we know that he knows better.

So Buu quickly overwhelms him, and he’s all set to fire a ki blast to finish off.   Why doesn’t Vegeta just transform to escape it?  

But then Goku jumps in and ruins Buu’s shot.  He’s still in base form too, but I sort of buy this, because he snuck up on Buu.   Even so, this sort of fast-and-loose attitude with power levels is exactly the sort of nonsense Toei did all through Dragon Ball GT, and one of several reasons why GT sucks.     It’s not as bad in filler scenes like this one, interspersed among stories based on the manga, but once there was no manga to work from, they just decided there were no rules, and Base Form Goku was almost interchangeable with Super Saiyan 4 Goku.   They just used whichever character design they preferred that day.

Vegeta’s astonished, because he thought Goku was down for the count, but he’s already back up and demanding to tag back in.    

But Goku ain’t done yet.  This is probably the other reason Toei had Vegeta fight in base form here, so it would make it look cooler when Goku defiantly powers up to continue his effort.   And yeah, it works.    I really do love this scene, but it’s a pretty egregious example of filler scenes messing with the flow of the story.

Goku ramps up to Super Saiyan 2, then back to 3, and we pick up where we left off.   And that’s awesome, but the main idea of this fight is that Goku’s having a hard time fighting at this level.   To have him drop out of SSJ3 early, then immediately get back up and resume SSJ3 like it’s no big deal... well, that undermines that premise.    I guess you can make an argument that it supports the premise, because having Goku power down twice in this fight only emphasizes how volatile SSJ3 really is, but... I dunno.  

Anyway, Goku goes back to fighting Buu, and you know, that may be the real reason Toei did that whole bit with Vegeta tagging in.    The alternative is to just have SSJ3 Goku fight Buu for two and a half episodes straight, and that would get dull, no matter how well they animated it.   You can have spectators observe the battle, and that’s a great way to break up the action, but a moment where Goku rescues Vegeta adds some drama.    The manga didn’t do this, but it didn’t need to, because this fight was much shorter in print.   

I guess that’s the main defense of filler.  Sometimes, it’s not about padding the anime, or working the studio’s “agenda” into the story, or anything sinister like that.  Sometimes it’s just a matter of pacing.  

Anyway, in either version, Vegeta watches Goku fighting, and quickly recognizes that Goku is the only one who can fight Majin Buu now.   At Vegeta’s level, he’d only get himself killed. 

Then he has this whole flashback of his relationship with Goku up to this point, and unlike most flashbacks in this series, this one features all new art, which is pretty awesome.  Honestly, they could have used old footage from the Saiyans Saga, but they had already done that recently during the Babidi Saga, so maybe Toei figured they couldn’t do that trick again so soon.   Or maybe they knew DBZ wes winding down, so they wanted to do something special while they still could.

Not surprisingly, Vegeta’s main recollection of his first fight with Goku are the parts where Goku beat the shit out of him while using Kaio-ken times three.  That fight had a lot more to it than that, and it’s easy to forget that Vegeta dominated most of the battle, mainly because Vegeta himself doesn’t see it that way.   

Then we get this part where Vegeta has kittens over Goku beating Recoome, and he begins to suspect that Goku is the Legendary Super Saiyan.    Would have been awesome to see another shot of Luffa the Golden Ape from episode 66, but I guess that wouldn’t make a ton of sense in this context, especially now that we know what Super Saiyans actually look like.

For instance...

Vegeta considers that Goku’s secret might be that he’s motivated by a need to protect his loved ones, but even if that’s true, Vegeta has his own loved ones now, so they’d be even if that were all it was.    I love how surly he looks here.   “Dammit, I can’t believe I care about these stupid people!   Now I gotta blow myself up if things get out of hand.”

Also, Vegeta’s observation ties in well with that filler scene from a moment ago.    Goku was exhausted, but as soon as he saw Vegeta in danger, he pulled himself together and found the strength to defend him.    Goku cares as much about Vegeta as the others.

But the real difference, Vegeta observes, is that he always fought for the fun of it, and for the satisfaction of killing his enemies.  Goku, on the other hand, fights primarily to improve himself.  That’s why he keeps pushing himself harder, and why he keeps seeing results.  It’s not about winning, it’s about not losing.    This seems to be a trend with Goku, where he usually says things like “I won’t lose” or “I ain’t lost yet,” instead of “I’m going to win.”    Vegeta’s classic mistake is to assume that he’s already going to win, and then he crumbles when things start to go wrong.

And critically, this is why Goku doesn’t kill people if he can avoid it.   Well, he killed a lot of Red Ribbon guys, but most of them were cowards and no real match for him.   King Piccolo pushed him too far.   After that, Goku’s been pretty light on killing enemies, and that’s probably because he reached a point where he became so strong that it got harder to find worthy adversaries.   Vegeta would kill his enemies just to watch them die, but in doing so, he denied himself the opportunity to face them in rematches.   This was something I read in a Superman comic once, where Superman overpowers an evil-universe version of himself, and he makes the point that his doppleganger kills all his enemies, so he only ever has to fight them once, where Superman has to stay sharp, because he has to mess with those guys over and over again.  Same deal.

And you’d think Goku might have killed Vegeta after he surpassed him, like when he became a Super Saiyan, or when Vegeta went Majin, and no one would have blamed him for putting the bastard down.  But Goku never did.   Not because Vegeta was no longer a threat, but because he knew Vegeta could still catch up to him some day and challenge him again.   Goku believes in Vegeta, even when Vegeta doesn’t believe in himself.

It’s like Goku knew Vegeta woud start to turn into a good guy.   See, this is where I take issue with criticism of the dub, way back in Episode 36, when Goku asked Krillin to spare Vegeta’s life.  The subs focus on Goku’s desire to beat Vegeta on his own, while the dub spends more time on Goku’s hope that Vegeta might see the light if they show him a little mercy.   And you can argue that the dub is cramming their own take into the script, except their take doesn’t exist in a vacuum.   Funimation’s take in Episode 36 is Vegeta’s take in Episode 280.   Call it foreshadowing, or call it putting the cart before the horse, but the line itself isn’t out of bounds, because Goku did hope that Vegeta would learn the value of mercy, and and Vegeta knows it. 

Again, let me pause to note that this big epiphany by Vegeta is much more effective when the bad guy is as flat as Kid Buu.   We’re not missing anything during this fight because they’ve just been hitting each other, and Buu bites Goku for like half a second while Vegeta reflects.

The main point of Vegeta’s monologue here is that he’s always struggled with the idea of Goku as the antithesis of what he thinks Saiyans ought to be.   And yet nothing succeeds like success.    Goku’s stronger right now than any Saiyan in the last thousand years.  Hell, right now, Goku’s the only Saiyan alive.    Vegeta’s dead, and so are all the others.  If his kindness is such a noose around his neck, why is he still breathing?    Why is he the only Saiyan who figured out how to turn Super Saiyan 3?   Why is he the only one who could bite Majin Buu on the head and get away with it?   Because Goku’s metal as fuck, that’s why.  Because kindness isn’t a weakness at all.   It never was.  If anything, it’s the lack of kindness that got all the other Saiyans killed.  

And maybe Vegeta has to think about that a while longer, but he knows this much, Goku’s better than he is.    He’s the best.

But he’s still not beating Buu anytime soon.  

There’s a cool spot here where Goku hits him and his upper body stretchs out from the impact, and he waves hello to Mr. Satan before snapping back.

And by “waving hello” , I mean “fires more of this pink crap out of his hands.”

And this right here is the last shot of Cell, I think?  There’s some more Frieza coming up, but I’m not sure if we see all the villains again or not.   

Babidi’s watching from way back there, because he’s shy.  I think Cell would hang out with Babidi.   He’s pretty sociable, right?

Anyway, this fight rules, not just because of all the great action and fluid animation, but because of all the cool stuff going on around it.    Everyone’s learning an important lesson about friendship today, thanks to Goku punching the crap out of this pink thing.  That... sounds vaguely dirty.    Let’s move on.

Oh, well, the episode’s over.    That’s kind of awkward.   Uh.   Goodbye!

[mothermaidenclone-blog]

Godzilla: King of the Monsters or It’s All About That Queen Bee Though

Godzilla: King of the Monsters was a very cool movie. Yes, it was pretty stupid, but was it also a gloriously fun, utterly ridiculous romp? Definitely. Warner Bros. knew we wanted to watch a bunch of massive monsters beat the ever-loving shit out of each other, and they certainly delivered on that front. As with any Godzilla movie, the main problem was that they spent too much time on the tiny, insignificant people and not enough on the aforementioned battling titans. However, there were some notable ladies featured amongst the squishy humans.

*Godzilla: King of the Monsters spoilers follow*

The first on screen conversation takes place between two women, Dr. Emma Russell (Vera Farmiga) and her daughter Madison (Millie Bobby Brown). Dr. Russell is evidently an exceptional scientist, as she has invented a device to communicate with, and to some extent control, the titans. She is also portrayed as brave and compassionate, risking her life to run to the aid of Mothra with her ORCA device. In addition, she wants her daughter to be strong and to experience what life has to offer, helping her to stroke Mothra once it has calmed down. She then guides her through the horrors of being held captive with the advice, “Eyes straight ahead, deep breaths, just like we talked about.” She isn’t shielding Madison from what is happening, but trying to help her to cope with it on her own.

However, it soon turns out that Dr. Russell is one of the villains of the movie, as she approached the eco terrorist Jonah Alan (Charles Dance) rather than being abducted by him, as it first appeared. As such, she is responsible for countless deaths in the movie, regardless of whether or not she is acting for the greater good of the planet. On the other hand, she is unwavering in the defence of her decisions and ethics, and even after the movie has declared her a baddie she is still portrayed as rational and somewhat empathetic.  She justifies her actions as being for the benefit of her daughter, and perhaps her daughter’s whole generation: “I couldn’t be more sane and Madison couldn’t be stronger. At least now she has a fighting chance.” At least Dr. Russell is granted a redemptive end - she dies saving not only her family, but arguably the entire planet, from the destructive forces of Ghidorah. It’s still shitty that she dies, no two ways about it, but at least she is granted some agency. Once a film like this declares you a villain you don’t stand a chance - it’s a noble sacrifice on her part and she isn’t just squashed by a giant monster foot while delivering a monologue about how her plans were right all along.

One of Dr. Russell’s plans does come to fruition, and that is that Madison becomes an incredibly strong young woman. She goes from slyly flipping off Jonah at the start of the movie to literally standing down Ghidorah and screaming right back in his fucking face. Now, it could well be argued that these are not the most considered of actions, but it cannot be denied that Madison has some nerve. In addition to being categorically courageous, Madison is also intelligent and principled. When she sees that Ghidorah’s rampage is becoming uncontrollable, she not only steals the ORCA from under the nose of a group of highly organised armed terrorists and escapes their fortified secret base, taking the time to appropriately supply herself for her journey (like no one in movies ever does!), but she also figures out the most effective location to broadcast from and operates the ORCA independently. Kudos to Madison, she knows what she’s doing. She does end up having to be rescued by her parents but two things are worth remembering at this point: firstly, Madison has just done her bit to save the entire planet and secondly, she is still a child. She’s more than allowed to run scared for a moment when a three-headed, lightning-breathing dragon from space is trying to cause the end of days.

Dr. Vivienne Graham (Sally Hawkins) reprises her role from the first film, and we are treated to a brief reminder of what a competent, intrepid scientist and eloquent, fearless defender of Godzilla she is before she is unceremoniously felled by Ghidorah. I didn’t even notice her death, and while it’s true I might have been taking notes and missed it, I was informed by a small piece of text on a character’s computer screen, which seems like an unnecessarily dismissive way to end the life of such an intrinsic character to the series.

Perhaps in an attempt to compensate for the loss of Dr. Graham, several new named female characters were introduced, and credit where credit’s due, pretty much all of these women are immediately addressed by their name and title. This not only shows them the respect they are due, but saved me the kind of IMDB credits trawling I usually have to do when writing a review. We meet another of Monarch’s top scientists, Dr. Ilene Chen (Ziyi Zhang). She is notable not only for her scientific competency, but also for her heritage, as she reveals she is the direct descendant of one of the female founders of Monarch, and shows a selection of photos of completely badass looking explorers and scientists that make up her family, all of whom are women. Her twin sister, Dr. Ling (also Ziyi Zhang) also briefly features, although she is seemingly working for the terrorists. We don’t see much of her except for an appropriately awed look at the hatching of Mothra, but it’s safe to assume by her presence at the site that she is an equally accomplished scientist. Dr. Chen is also notable for being an advocate of not blowing Godzilla to smithereens, pointing out that, “slaying dragons is a western concept.”

Another new female character is Colonel Diane Foster (Aisha Hinds), an extremely competent officer and woman of colour, who seems to be in charge of the military branch of Monarch’s operations. She continues to excel throughout the movie, surviving the attack that killed Dr. Graham and continuing to lead others safely through danger until the end. Foster is shown to be a strong leader as well as a distinguished field officer - she is a highly skilled sniper who cares deeply about saving innocent lives.

Black women continue to occupy positions of power, if not leading roles, in Godzilla: King of the Monsters, as further exemplified by Senator Williams (CCH Pounder), who presides over the Monarch hearing at the start of the film and appears to have the power to turn the whole organisation over to the military if she so chooses. Women do very much inhabit the world of this movie, with many women being present of all sides of the conflict as scientists, soldiers and terrorists alike. Although I’m not sure we hear all their names, many are credited, including Asaj (Tracy Garrison), one of Jonah’s team, First Lieutenant Griffin (Elizabeth Ludlow), Lieutenant Bottin (Natalie Shaheen), G-Team Officer Harryhausen (Shauna Rappold), Argo Officer Arvin (Skylar Denney), Argo Officer Cross (Kelli Garner) and a news anchor (Fiona Hardingham) who is one of the first voices we hear in the movie. The fact that two of these characters are named for practical effects superstars tells me that they held a special place in the hearts of the movie makers.

However wonderful all of these women are, let’s talk about the real leading lady of this movie - Mothra. Not only is she utterly radiant and resplendent, she can hold her own in a fight -  penetrating Rodan with her stinger - and apparently has the monumental power of the ability to resurrect Godzilla. In short, she’s amazing. She is also the only titan to be named as female, which makes it all the more shitty that she’s the only one - other than the big bad Ghidorah - to die. It seems even female kaiju aren’s safe from the played out and tired fate of dying for the benefit of their male counterparts. Now, my little brother (who is more of a Gozilla expert than me) texted me as soon as he knew I’d seen the movie to tell me not to worry and that Mothra is apparently immortal, because he knew I’d be so cross and sad about this. Thanks, baby bro. However, as this is not addressed in the movie, I have to stand by my initial assessment that Mothra’s death is pure garbage.

Overall, the women in Godzilla: King of the Monsters are incredibly strong and adept in a wide variety of fields ranging from science to combat, are without exception incredibly brave, and most of them hold to a high moral code. Furthermore, for a monster movie where presumably thousands of people are slaughtered, their mortality rate isn’t too bad. I think one more named male character dies than female, but this doesn’t make the loss of talented female scientists on screen any easier to swallow. Also, they killed Mothra, so I can never forgive them. Well, not until she comes back in a sequel and fucks up some even bigger bastards because you know I will watch another Godzilla movie, no hesitation. On balance, this is an absolutely ridiculous movie about giant dragons murdering each other, so I think we’re lucky that so many competent human women were featured at all.

And now for some asides:

Umm, excuse me, was that casually Atlantis? And did you blow it up?

Also did this movie low-key endorse hollow Earth theory?

Thank you, Godzilla: King of the Monsters, for the gift of someone ejector-seating straight into Rodan’s fiery maw. You truly know your audience.

[ilovemcu3000]

The Stark Kids and where they went in life (my headcannon)

All 3 are Co-CEOs of Stark Indistries after Pepper retires at 65 (never remarried, and keeps her ring on every day until she dies)

MORGAN HOWARD STARK-POTTS

5-? years old: Lexi Rabe (I hope Lexi plays her as long as possible tbh, because to me she IS Morgan. But if not I have my fan cast for pre-teen and teen - adult Morgan here too)

12-15 years old: Millie Bobby Brown (I got the idea from the new Godzilla, Idk I just like the idea of Millie playing an older Lexi, I think they look really similar)

16 and older: Katherine Langford (I know some people don’t like this casting decision, which is fine, but it’s what seems to be the future and I think she’ll do great, she’s a good actress and I trust marvel with casting)

Personality: Confident, Genius, very proud of who her parents are, Loving, if she’s quiet she’s either PISSED or so sad and/or anxious that she’s breaking down, has anxiety like her father did but handles it like a champ in most situations unless it’s overwhelming, professional like her mom, mannerisms are 55% Tony and 45% Pepper, family is most important thing to her, Tonys sence of humour, 25% little s*it, has her own Iron Woman suit like Pepper and helps Harley with his Iron Lad suits + Peters Spider-Man suits.

Idol(s): Mom And Dad without question

Best Friends: Shuri Udaku, Cassie Lang, Lila Barton, Cooper Barton, Nathaniel Barton, Monica Rambeau

Family: Virginia Stark-Potts (Mom), Anthony Stark-Potts (Dad), Peter Parker and Harley Keener (practically adoptive brothers), Uncles are all male avengers basically (but her favorites are Happy,Bruce, and Rhodey for obvious reasons), Aunts are all female avengers (but Carol Danvers , Hope Van Dyne, Nebula, And May Parker are her favorites) God mother: Natasha Romanoff, Grandparents: Maria And Howard Stark (she hates Howard after learning everything about how he treated Tony) and Peppers parents whoever they are 🤷🏻‍♀️, Sister in Law: Michelle Parker-Jones (Morgan has loved having her in the family since they met when Peter and Michelle started dating 😂 and Morgan was MJs maid of honor at their wedding)

She still vaguely remembers Tony. Occasionally watching the recording/ other videos of him and asking mom or her brothers or any of her aunts and uncles when she wants to learn more about him helps too...she’s so proud of who he was, but sometimes can’t help but feel like something great was ripped away from her. Like an almost perfect puzzle just missing one peice, her dad. (This is her favorite video of him btw ⬇️ 😂)

HARLEY KEENER

Ty Simpkins is Harley no matter what (obvi 😂)

He’s 12 in Iron Man 3 And 17 when the Decimation happened ( he probably got dusted in 2018 so he’s still that @ the funeral)

Personality hasn’t changed much, he’s still kind of a little s*it and loves science. He meets Peter and Morgan at the funeral and they are “The Stark Kids tm” from then on because they realize THEY are Tonys legacy, what he left for the world

Him and Tony had kept in contact since 2013, Harley started being invited for Thanksgiving and Christmas among other holidays in 2014 and has gone every year. He lives with his mom and his sister is off at college...once Tony died he started hanging out more with Pepper, Peter, and Morgan because he knew they needed support. And him and Peter knew they needed to make sure that Morgan knows who her dad was and what he did. It got to the point where he would spend a week with his mom, then a week at the stark lake house until he got his own house at 20, and then becomes Iron Lad with the help of his new found brother and sister Peter and Morgan, and some of Tonys old files and information about the suits. He helps keep things in order at SI and around the world. His mom and actual sister come visit every week. And Pepper, Peter And Morgan with all of the other avengers are his other family. He found a new family and purpose thanks to Tony and he’s forever grateful for it.

PETER BENJAMIN PARKER

Tom Holland IS Peter Parker period, end of discussion

We’re still unfolding his story in the MCU, so this will be a little bit harder, but I have my ideas.

He was hurting bad for about two months after it all happened. Especially after her figures out why Tony invented time travel and his reason for helping the rest of the avengers...to get him back. He blames himself, for Morgan not growing up with her dad, and for Tony not getting the happy ending he deserved. That’s why he vowed to himself to protect Morgan until the day he dies and never let her forget how amazing her father was. But he learns over the years that Tony is still with him, and he’ll see him again someday. The experience of losing Tony and his run in with Mysterio matured him a lot

He went from this

To this

And it is (1) because of the emotional taxation of dealing with the death of his third father figure. The one he thought he would have for at least longer than Ben, but that didn’t work out.

this is the moment he goes from being a happy-go- lucky teenager to a strong, brave, man. Not because he wants too, but because he has experienced enough pain in his 16 years of living that the child-like feeling of euphoria “nothing can possibly go wrong” kids and teens usually have has faded

⬇️

(2) He also matures because of the betrayal of Mysterio, the villain that hurt him the most mentally, that paranoia of him looms over peter in the future too...whenever something he feels is “too good” happens, ( graduates high school, marries MJ, etc.) he can’t relax because he wonders if quinten is still alive and tricking him. He still is positive, and the purest bean there ever was, no one can take that away. But he just takes his duties as a hero more seriously. He does the same thing as Harley, a week with May and a week with Pepper and his new older brother and little sister along with the avengers. He marries Michelle after 3 years of dating and after being married for a year they have two girls that are two years apart my headcannon names are Abigail Franklin Parker-Jones (Michelles grandmas name and you gotta keep Benjamin Franklin in the family since him, his dad, and his uncle have either Benjamin or Franklin as their middle name so Franklin is her middle name) and Riley Edward Parker-Jones (Tonys middle name in honor of him) and Miles comes in after Abigail but before Riley. Peter and Miles have practically a Carbon copy relationship to the one Peter and Tony had and Miles reminds him so much of himself at that age, being a surrogate father AND a real father too makes him appreciate what Tony Stark and Ben and Richard Parker did for him ten times more 😂 he’s convinced those three men are his guardian angels

Tonys legacies are these three...and he could NOT be prouder

[party-of-rpg-muses]

A Look At Stuff You Probably Never Heard Of: Parasite Eve (Movie)

Last year, I took a look at the Square Enix game, Parasite Eve. So this year, I’ll be taking a look at its prequel. Kinda. Today, we’ll be taking a look at the Parasite Eve movie.

Released on February 1st, 1997, Parasite Eve was directed by Masayuki Ochiai, who also directed two Ju-On (The Grudge) movies that never left Japan. It was produced in Japan by Toho (who also owns the Godzilla movies), and distributed in Japan by Fuji TV, but also distributed by ADV Films in America and by Fuji in Europe.

The movie is an adaptation of the science-fiction horror novel of the same name, written by pharmacologist and writer, Hideaki Sena. His job consists of him testing mitochondria with various drugs to see how they convert fatty acids into energy. He was inspired after seeing a documentary on mitochondria and wondered what if the mitochondria was sentient and were tired on the symbiotic relationship they were a part of.

Set in Japan, university professor and scientist, Toshiaki Nagashima, is greeted by his wife, Kiyomi, who wishes to celebrate their first anniversary as a married couple. However, he is unable to do so, as he is busy with work. But as Kiyomi is diving home, she gets into a car crash that leaves her brain dead. Ultimately, Toshiaki begrudgingly agrees to euthanize her. He is then met with a doctor named Takatsugu Yoshizumi, who informs him that Kiyomi was registered as an organ donor and requests her kidney, as his patient, Mariko Anzai, has been hospitalized with kidney failure. Toshiaki agrees, but in exchange, he wants Kiyomi’s liver, so he can cultivate her liver cells in an attempt to revive her. He refers to the cells as “Eve”. However, the cells reform into a being with Kiyomi’s face, known only as Eve, who wishes to destroy humanity and give birth to the Ultimate Being, whos birth would herald the end of all living creatures that require the mitochondria to live with the mitochondria themselves becoming the dominant species on the planet.

It’s a little hard to talk about a live action movie, since it’s not like it has graphics or anything to talk about. But what can be said is that cinematography is pretty interesting; case and point being when Kiyomi is driving and when she gets into the car crash. The acting is pretty decent... for the most part. And there are some interesting special effects too.

The movie also adapts the book pretty well for the most part and even expands on a few things, such as Toshiaki’s guilt regarding what happened to his wife and his sanity slowly slipping over the course of the film. However, it downplays the horror aspect of the story and instead focuses more on the science-fiction and the romance between Kyomi and Toshiaki.

So, now that we got through all of that, it’s time for my Final Recommendation: Never Let Go Of It||Get It||Hold Onto It||Try It||Consider It||Stay Away From It 

Strange, isn’t it? I put high praise into the game, but put the film a bit lower. It’s fairly enjoyable, but the movie certainly isn’t for everyone. In fact, it can even be considered dated in some regards. But one of the biggest problems tends to be the acting in some regards. Main point being towards the end of the movie, when Eve sets a nurse on fire. The nurse simply stands in place and screams, not acting like someone whose on fire at all.

And I’m going to break my “No Spoiler” rule this time by also mentioning a difference between the film and book, which is also a downside. In the book, Mariko gives birth to the Ultimate Being after Eve dies of necrosis. But the “male” mitochondria within the Ultimate Being “courtesy” of Toshiaki, who was “raped” by Eve, who takes the form of Kiyomi, staged a rebellion, causing the Ultimate Being to switch between male and female. Toshiaki embraces his child in an attempt to control the psychokinetic-like outbursts from the child as it dies. In the process, the two merge and melt together. But in the film, while Toshiaki is still “raped” by Eve, who has Kiyomi’s form, Eve doesn’t die before transferring the sperm to Mariko. In the film, she takes Mariko from her hospital bed, planning to transfer the sperm to her. But at the roof of the hospital, Toshiaki speaks with Eve, who claims that she planned to have Kiyomi to meet with Toshiaki and have the two fall in love, so that her plan would work, setting Toshaki on fire bit by bit as he steps closer to her. Toshaki argues that he fell in love with her despite that, being in love with her before their “initial” meeting that Eve put her plan into action. This somehow allows Kiyomi to reclaim control from Eve and the two share a kiss as they burn to death in each other’s arms. But according to Masayuki, he was forced to make it a love story by the producers.

Before I end this, I want to draw attention to the fact that this is a prequel. Canonically, this is the first time Eve showed up to cause trouble. I previously mentioned Mariko Anzai, who is believed to be the exact same Mariko Brea, who was the mother of Aya Brea, the protagonist of the Parasite Eve games.

If you wish to watch the movie, you can view it here. However, I should warn you that there is a scene in which a nude Eve has sex with Toshaki and it goes on for a few minutes. There is also a scene in which you can see Kiyomi’s internal organs as her body is being operated on.

Goodness, this was quite lengthy. But it’s done now, so I’ll see you all next month. Hope you guys like heavy metal and all things rock!

[popwasabi]

My Top 10 Favorite Giant Monster Movies

It’s hard to pinpoint exactly what it is that I love so much about the giant monster movie genre.

Perhaps it was my early fascination with dinosaurs and big animals at the zoo, or simply the idea of smashing model buildings and miniature cities growing up but giant monster flicks have stood the test of time for me more so than most of my childhood fascinations.

It’s a genre that can be both deeply thematic and even at the same time joyfully cheesy in the best way. It’s like watching your action figures come to life on the big screen and your imagination taking a larger than life form.

(And of course can be really entertaining on a “So bad it’s good” level too.)

So it has truly pleased me as a longtime fan of this crazy genre that giant monster flicks appear to be making a comeback these past five years with beautifully rendered and fully realized Hollywood re-imagining’s and with the new “Pacific Rim” film set to come out today I felt it would be great to share with you some of my all-time favorite monster flicks and why you should all make time to watch them.

I haven’t seen every kaiju-sized monster film blockbuster (you won’t find any of the “Cloverfield” films on here) but I have watched most all of the major ones that have appeared. So without further ado here are my top 10 favorite giant monster movies of all-time.

  10. Godzilla against Mechagodzilla

There have been five total movies and three different costumes involving this particular nemesis of Godzilla but 2002’s “Godzilla against Mechagodzilla” is the best one of them all.

First of all, it’s the only version of Mechagodzilla that actually looks like the actual G-man himself (set to make an appearance in this month’s “Ready Player One” btw) and secondly there’s a fairly decent story going on in the middle of all of it.

It’s basically your typical soldier’s redemption arc but with a kaiju-sized plot point. Yumiko Shaku plays an ex pilot who’s run in with Godzilla during a mission costs the lives of her fellow service men some years ago and now she’s been recruited to pilot a great new weapon built on the bones of the original 1954 Godzilla (Godzilla timelines and realities are more all over the place than the X-Men franchise btw). Its dark at times but the cast plays well off each other and when the monster suit action goes down it’s a real blast to watch Godzilla and his mechanical doppelganger throw down.

Best Moment: 

When Mechagodzilla arrives in the final act to beat up on Godzilla he hilariously flies down from the sky and bumps him out of the way from fire-balling a children’s hospital in this hilariously dated visual shot. I can’t tell you how many times me and my friend rewound this scene to watch and laugh at it again and again as middle-schoolers back in the day.

 9. Kong: Skull Island

The first of the new era of kaiju films on this list, this movie gets more and more fun each time I watch it. It has very little resemblance to any of the previous American King Kong films and frankly is more in line with Toho’s recreation of the character in the 60s and 70s in the best way.

After the so-so reimagining of “Godzilla” in 2014 I wondered if Hollywood would understand why there were mixed reactions to that film. Giant monster films really only work on two ends of a very extreme spectrum. You can only do them super dark and serious with heavy handed metaphors and minimal approaches to revealing the monster OR you show the monster all the time in the most ridiculous, action-packed, over-the-top, cheesy fashion. “Godzilla 2014” tried to have it both ways, trying some metaphorical shit about Godzilla (that really never applied to him) while also having a Showa era style monster throwdown.

“Kong” doesn’t make this mistake, instead opting for the latter in one ridiculous monster fight sequence after another. The big ape goes full pro-wrestler in this film and layeths the smacketh down on these Skull Island monster’s candy ass’s and it’s a total blast.

(BAW GAWD!)

It also helps that unlike “Godzilla 2014,” while characters are fairly one-dimensional in this too, they are at least fun to watch and the script seems self-aware that they are in a big cheesy monster film between the bantering of the soldiers and John C. Reilly’s delightful WWII Dr. Bruhl routine.

“Kong” was one of the films that was quietly one of the best, in my opinion, in 2017 and I’m looking forward to the next Giant Monster shared universe film because of it.

Best Moment: 

When Kong starts flinging old boat propeller chains at the big Skull Crawler in the final act like fucking Kratos from “God of War.” It’s again such an awesomely, ridiculous sequence that harkens back to the cheesy films it pays homage to in the best way. Not to mention tearing the monster’s throat out was gnarly as hell too.

 8. Gamera: Attack of Legion

Godzilla is obviously the most popular kaiju to emerge from the Pacific Ocean to attack Japan but not enough fans worldwide pay tribute to the big flying, fire-breathing, turtle that often protects it, from Toho’s rival studio Daiei.

Gamera is probably my second favorite all-time kaiju and his films in the 90s were arguably better and definitely darker than the Godzilla films that came out during the Hesei era. The giant turtle had some truly violent confrontations, for kids movies, during this time and “Attack of Legion” almost gave me nightmares as a child.

If you like “Starship Troopers” or “Aliens” this is a good one to watch as Gamera takes on a hive of space-faring, plant-based(?) insects and the smalls ones rip apart the humans in often grisly fashion in this film.

The costumed fight sequences are a lot of fun to watch and Legion herself(?) is a really well designed monster that plays a worthy adversary for the Guardian of Earth.

Best Moment: 

When Gamera unleashes his big new weapon when his chest opens up and puts out a giant chest fireball powered from ancient energies from a far (I know right?). It kind of reminds me of Guyver’s own chest busting weapon in his manga series (ask your weeaboo friends) and it leaves behind an anime sized crater where Legion once stood. Few of the Godzilla films have a sequence as jaw-dropping as this one and even if it was a big cheesy monster flick it’s still quite a cinematic moment when it goes down.

 7. Gamera: Revenge of Iris

This one by far is probably the darkest of the Heisei era monster flicks.

There’s a small element of Cronenberg level horror in this film and some more grissly death scenes the Gamera franchise is known for in the 90s. At its core though it has a pretty decent thematic story about revenge and how it consumes us all, leading to in this case literal big consequences as a Japanese school girl name Ayana, who’s family was crushed accidentally by Gamera in the first film of this series (“Guardian of the Universe”) vows revenge by calling on an ancient evil beast to kill the big turtle.

The cinematography, even for a costumed monster flick is really solid in this film and even today has aged fairly well. The dark hues of Japan during a stormy night, the updated more vicious look of Gamera and the new enemy Iris all look the part in this big revenge-filled throwdown.

It’s the type of spectacle that makes these Gamera films stand apart from the rest of the costume monster genre as being one of the few that manages to be cheesy with giant rubber suit but also dark and thematic at the same time.

It’s still such a damn shame though we never got to see this giant turtle lock horns with the King of Monsters though =/.

Best Moment: 

When Gamera his own hand off, which was pinned to the Kyoto Bullet Train station by Iris’s claw, to save himself and Ayana, and goes full G Gundam shining finger on its ass. Yeah, it’s a pretty insane sequence but it’s so fucking cool when it happens!

 6. King Kong (1933)

If this was a list based purely on level of importance to the genre the original “King Kong” is easily number one on here. But we’re rating this purely on my own personal aesthetic taste because if we rated films only on their importance to filmmaking everyone would have “Birth of a Nation” and “The Jazz Singer” on their top 10 lists and I’m preeeety sure no one wants that (seriously look it up).

Anyways, “King Kong” despite being made almost 100 years ago now is the most important film in this genre by a mile and has a pretty awesome amount of giant monster action that holds up on the fun scale even after all this time. The stop motion animation used in this film was revolutionary for its time and still visually entertaining to watch between the man eating brontosaurs (yeah, I know) and Kong beating the shit out of other large beasts on the island all while just wanting to spend some quiet time with his special lady friend.

It’s one of the first major blockbusters too in Hollywood history, hugely influential on a host of a big-time directors and virtually all giant monster fans will tell you their first love was this movie.

I guess it’s only because I’m such a Godzilla/Tokusatsu fanboy “King Kong” isn’t higher on this list but regardless, this big great ape will always have a spot in my kaiju-shaped heart.

Hail to the King, baby.

Best Moment:  

After all this time it’s still Kong breaking the jaw of the tyrannosaur while saving Ann from being eaten. It’s a scene that has been recreated in other monster films multiple times but the original is still a classic moment.

 5. Godzilla: GMK

Short for “Godzilla, Mothra, King Ghidorah” (which is funny because it completely leaves out Baragon from this title who is also in it), “GMK” is far and away the best of the Millennium era of the giant monster films and unsurprisingly the man behind the greatness of this kaiju flick also made the three bad ass Gamera films of the 90s: Shusuke Kaneko.

Kaneko, much like his Gamera films, mixes in the cheese of your typical rubber suit monster film with the darker tone his films of the past take on.

Generally speaking the closer the story of a Godzilla film relates to the original 1954 movie the stronger the story is and this one builds on the themes of the atomic bomb while also addressing a topic relevant to Japanese politics.

This has been ongoing for a while in Japanese society but for those who don’t already know Japan has no army. It has a defense force that is in many ways under the jurisdiction of the United States and the rest of the world. Japan pretty much lost its sovereignty to defend itself after WWII and this has not sat well with much of the country. Another film, that you’ll see soon on this list, also addresses this topic but the position Kaneko takes is that Japan has forgotten the horrible the sins it committed in the wake of WWII and must understand why it has lost its right to have an active military.

Godzilla works best when he’s a big walking metaphor for something terrible and in this way Godzilla assumes the visage of a vengeful God coming to punish Japan for those sins it committed during the war. In this film Godzilla is the accumulation of dead souls from the pacific campaign and Imperial occupation of Asia and it’s an appropriate way of reminding the Japanese audience of this film “Don’t you ever fucking forget what you did.”

Now, there’s a strong debate to be had about giving Japan back its military. Afterall, if the US can invade other countries and commit war crimes why the hell should we be able to tell Japan (an ally) they can’t either? BUT it’s still important that Japan understands why such a declaration was made in the first place and certainly promoting revisionist history of their time occupying Asia is NOT a good look and this film expresses that loudly.

Best Moment: 

A little Easter egg moment is honestly my favorite among all the giant monster action and heavy metaphors of the story. Basically the cast of characters are discussing other strange monster sized occurrences across the world and one of them remarks there was an attack in New York in 1998 and how the Americans think it was Godzilla. Then one of the characters more or less says “Nah that can’t be true” and it’s pretty amusing of course if you know what that’s referencing.

 4. Godzilla vs Destoryah

Other fanboys in the 90s had “The Death Superman” that rocked their childhoods and put them into a depressed stupor. Well, for me in my childhood it was “Godzilla vs Destoryah” aka “The one where Godzilla finally dies.”

I remember picking that VHS tape up from my local video rental shack as a kid with both giddy excitement and somber acceptance. First of all the name “Destoryah” as a kid that sounded totally bad ass and I couldn’t wait to see my favorite giant reptile throw down with him but knowing this would be his last film (for now) made me sad and depressed.

Set a truly beautiful and dark score by the original “Gojira” composer Akira Ifukube the thrills and destruction of Godzilla is fully realized in its rubber costume glory. I don’t think there was a better looking suit than this volcano inspired visage the G-man rocks here.

Destoryah himself is a really neat looking monster too. Part prehistoric crustacean and part demon from the underworld, this beast was real eye candy for me as a kid and paid homage to original film’s big plot device. The Oxygen Destroyer, which is the device that killed “Gojira” in the first film, is what mutates Precambrian era lifeforms into this beast that ultimately does battle with Godzilla and it’s a glorious throwdown.

There’s also a light homage to “Aliens” in this film too when the Japanese equivalent of SWAT gets whacked in a refinery by a bunch of smaller Destroyahs and it’s actually a pretty tension filled sequence.

But it was knowing that the film was the end of an era that made it so great, as the actors behind the characters seem to be self-aware of this being Godzilla’s final curtain call (again, for now). It’s like watching a liftetime achievement award in action almost as the kaiju mayhem is upped to 11 and Godzilla’s ultimate death is both cinematic and mesmerizing to watch all while Ifukube’s score plays softly in the background.

Best Moment: 

As the dust settles from Godzilla’s meltdown, we suddenly see a large silhouette in the smoke where Godzilla Jr’s body once lay, Destoryah had presumably killed him earlier but now a fully grown new Goji stands there triumphantly roaring into the night.

As a kid this made me tear up, not just because I was attached to Jr. and was glad he was ok but because it was like the film was saying to its fans “This isn’t good bye. We’ll be back.”

I had gone into watching this movie as a kid thinking this would be the last Godzilla film I would ever watch and it had made me sad but seeing the new Godzilla emerge from old one’s shadow made me hopeful I would see my favorite childhood, atomic breathing dinosaur once more.

And sure enough I did.

 3. Pacific Rim

This movie isn’t so much a film as it is a love letter to the Tokusatsu genre. If you grew up on giant monster flicks and mech anime this was the film that was made for you and the childlike joy Guillermo Del Toro directs this film with is just perfect.

No, the story isn’t particularly deep and neither are the characters as it has a bit of “Top Gun” mixed in with “Neon Genesis Evangelion” but the film is so colorful and fun that who gives a shit?

A giant mech, that looks like a football player, uses an elbow rocket to punch a gorilla shaped giant monster in the face and later uses an oil tanker like a baseball bat to club another one. It’s awesome!

What was truly great about the film though is that it feels like a cheesy monster flick from the 60s but simply with updated graphics. Unlike the failed 1998 “Godzilla” film these monsters don’t move around like fucking T-Rexes. They lumber, they throw fists with exaggerated motions, and heave themselves around without any sense of grace, just like dude’s in rubber suits do. It looks like how I would imagine those old monster flicks would look with better CGI.

And of course Charlie Day and Ron Pearlman are just delightful as Newt and Hannibal Chau as they are in everything they are a part of. The cast in general seems to have blast in this movie and it’s part of what makes the film so perfect.

Best Moment: 

Nearing the end of the battle in China, Raleigh and Mako are out of options as a winged kaiju flies them up into space to drop them down from up high but just as all hope seems lost Mako unlocks the last weapon on Gypsy Danger; A FUCKING SWORD! And just to put icing on the cake before slicing the kaiju in half, Mako delivers the most badass line of film triumphantly declaring in Japanese “For my Family!” I lost my damn mind in theaters when she dropped that line. Who cares if they didn’t use the damn sword earlier; that was fucking awesome!

 2. Shin Gojira

“Shin Gojira” is basically what I thought/wanted “Godzilla 2014” to be.

I felt it had been too long since we had a truly evil Godzilla film (GMK being one of the few outliers really in about 60 plus years of Godzilla films). The big guy had been a Face for too long and desperately needed to revert back to being a Heel and “Shin Gojira” takes the big guy back to his grim, dark, metaphorical roots.

Out of all the Godzilla films that have come out this one most closely resembles the tone and themes of the original, though with some differences in the messaging. This film takes the opposite side of “GMK” in that it’s all about the Japanese need for national sovereignty again. It’s openly critical of the US and of the Japanese government’s failure of bureaucracy. If anything, it’s almost a conservative film railing against the dangers of big government.

More than half the film is really just board room meetings within the Japanese government where that failure of politics really becomes heavy and sometimes even feels a bit like “Dr. Strangelove” with the dry, dark humor as the politicians fail again and again to address the problem.

I don’t believe either “Shin Gojira” or “GMK” make stronger points on Japanese politics but rather they both make good ones and this film illustrates well that Japan is in many ways defenseless toward attack without the rest of the world getting involved. In this way Godzilla becomes a big walking metaphor for any number of threats that could attack Japan, from North Korea to Russia and hell even an allegory for the US’s own meddling in this regard.

There’s a real sense of dread with each step Godzilla takes in this film, leaving a large path of destruction in his way. He plods slowly but you get the sense that despite this there is truly nothing Japan can or is even prepared to do and it adds to the somber reality of the story’s theme. There���s pretty obvious callbacks to the Fukushima disaster too as we see tidal waves wash over the cities and nuclear waste left behind by Godzilla and it adds to the film’s relevant messaging.

A lot of fans have mixed opinions on Godzilla’s, let’s say, crusty appearance but personally I liked it. There’s a nice horror element to this design as this particular Godzilla is made out millions of mutated creatures in the ocean coming together and his cold, dead, listless eyes are pure nightmare fuel. It’s in my opinion one of the best looks the big reptile has ever had and it especially works well to again add to this image of Godzilla as less a creature and more a demonic God coming to punish the non-believers.

Best Moment: 

When Godzilla unhinges his mandibles (Holy shit! What the fuck!?) and unloads a giant anime sized atomic blast upon Tokyo in honestly my favorite giant monster sequence of all-time.

Unlike “Godzilla 2014’s” big atomic blast sequence which plays more like cheap fan service, there’s a clear build-up to this moment in the film. Things had been steadily getting worse with each scene in this movie up until this point for the Japanese and the main characters are all on the ropes at this point as they just try to escape Godzilla’s wrath, giving in to defeat as they run for safety. Then Godzilla’s fins begin lighting up and it’s like “Oh shit what now?” for these characters and the entire sequence plays like the gates of the Rapture opening up. It’s terrifying and if you didn’t get to see this cinematic scene on the big screen while it was in select theaters, you truly missed out.

 1. Gojira

You didn’t actually think this list wouldn’t end with this at number one, right?

Yup, the original 1954 classic is my all-time favorite monster movie and while the genre is largely just fun, campy schlocke, “Gojira” even with its dated special affects is not that type of movie.

It’s somber, dark, depressing and was a hugely important film at the time for Japan. Up until this point there wasn’t a whole lot of post war or atomic bomb discussion or expression among the Japanese and it made it hard to cope with what happened. “Gojira” was the first time the people of Japan kind of got to confront what happened and it was both terrifying and cathartic for them.

“Gojira” though is a story that ultimately is about the failure of humanity. The film was created less than a year after an off shore atomic bomb test unintentionally killed Japanese Fishermen in the pacific causing another panic amongst the Japanese populace reminding them of what had happened just a decade before. Godzilla in this film becomes a metaphor for that failure to not learn from the mistake of creating such a terrible weapon. He becomes less a “force of nature” metaphor as King Kong is and more egregiously how the 2014 film made him out to be but rather again a vengeful God coming to punish the human race for their hubris and sins.

The creation of Godzilla in this story, an ancient subterranean dinosaur awakened and mutated by atomic bomb testing, harkens back to the themes of Mary Shelley’s classic “Frankenstein” and how we humans often meddle with forces beyond our understanding to the point of our own undoing. The film makes this point effectively with each step Godzilla takes as he levels Tokyo and the despair and dread of the characters and the citizens of Japan can be heavily felt on screen. It’s a darkly, beautiful film because of it and it’s kind of ironic when you think such a thematic and message driven story could give birth to such a cheesy and over the top genre of movies for decades to come.

Nonetheless “Gojira” stands alone as not just the King of Monsters but the King of all Monster Films.

Best Moment:

In the aftermath of Godzilla’s destruction we cut to the next day where the citizens pick up the fallen pieces of their city and its people. There’s hospitals full of the wounded and dead and shots of children with Geiger counters beeping all over them. This is really where the film really emphasizes the pure terrible destruction the atomic bomb and how we all are doomed to repeat this tragedy if we don’t learn to coexist better. As school children sing a “Prayer For Peace” over these images it’s truly hard not to get misty eyed during this sequence.

Anyways that’s my list, hope you enjoyed reading it! Let me know what your favorite giant monster film is in the comments! Cya at the Miracle Mile tonight when we cancel the Apocalypse again!

War ready, mother fuckers!

[ramblingthoughtsofayoungadult]

Riverdale’s Pagliacci-Riverdale Imagine

Requested: No

Warnings: some depressing thoughts and it’s pretty long

A/N: I really like Riverdale and had this idea in my head while watching it. Hope you enjoy it! Slight Y/N X Archie

There’s an old story about a man who goes to the doctor because he’s depressed and feels all alone in the cruel world. The doctor tells him to go see the great clown Pagliacci since he’s in town tonight and is sure to lift his mood. The man looks up at the doctor and bursts into tears and says that he is Pagliacci. It’s an old trope about how the funniest people are really the most depressed people. It helps explain things like how the great Robin Williams, who brought joy to so many people, would kill himself. However, when we really think about it, it makes sense: funny people make jokes about the crappy things going on around us to not only distract us but themselves from the horrors of the world. Sure, they’re known as a bright light, but it’s also hard for funny people to express how sad and in pain they really are because they’re supposed to see the humor in everything. Little did my friends and I know that we had our own Pagliacci: Y/N Y/L/N. She used to say that she came out of the womb pulling a funny face and then her mom dropped her so her face would straighten out. It was definitely one of her darker jokes, but it always made people laugh. She always had this look in her y/e/c eyes that said “If you thought that was funny, wait until you see or hear this...”. However, a little after the death of Jason Blossom, the brightness in her eyes was fading away and it was almost too late before my friends and I noticed it. It started off as a normal night at Pop’s for me, writing and brooding until Y/N walked in.

    The bell on the front door of Pop’s dinged as someone else walked into the dinner that fateful night. It was only eight o’clock but Jughead was already three pages into the latest part of his novel and he was in a zone if he did say so himself.

    “Pop’s, the usual please but make my milkshake a double, it’s been one of those days,” Y/N said as she sauntered over to Jughead’s booth.

    The owner chuckled behind the counter. “Right away, Miss Y/L/N.”     “A double chocolate milkshake with extra whip cream? You must plan to die a heroic death by diabetes,” Jughead said without looking up from him laptop screen.

    “My body needs sugar. Without it, it goes all haywire,” Y/N said as she sat in the seat across from Jughead. “Who are you writing about this time? Is it the mysterious Veronica? The golden Archie? Or is it your beloved blonde, Betty?”      “None of the above,” Jughead said, but not without a notable bristle at the word “beloved”. 

     “Then who could you possibly be writing about?” Suddenly, Y/N’s eyes widened and she placed a hand over her heart. “Is it about me? Are you writing about how impossibly charming and witty I am?”

      Jughead couldn’t fight the smile off his face as he tried to remain serious. “I see you’ve humbled with age and no, I’m not writing about you.”

      Y/N scoffed and stole some fries off his plate. “Whatever, I do expect a full chapter of me in that finished novel though. We both know how much amazing material I’ve given you over the years.”

     “Yes, but we’re not all talented at writing jokes about our dearest friends,” Jughead said.

     Y/N’s eyes widened as she remembered something. “That reminds me, I came up with some new jokes.”

    “Have you been invited to perform somewhere?”

    “No, but it doesn’t hurt to be prepared.” She began digging her notebook of jokes out of her backpack without waiting for Jughead’s response.

     “Y/N, I’m kind of busy.”      Y/N narrowed her y/e/c eyes at him and Jughead couldn’t help but smirk. They had a tradition of meeting at Pop’s and they would run their ideas by each other. Jughead would critique Y/N’s jokes and Y/N would critique Jughead’s stories. Sometimes, Jughead would get annoyed with all the physical humor Y/N would do in her acts because he thought she was being lazy while Y/N didn’t always appreciated Jughead’s use of prose nor his metaphors. However, their writing relationship worked and helped strengthen their long friendship.

     “Alright, I’m all ears.” Jughead closed his laptop and leaned forward, giving Y/N all his attention.

     “Okay, I came up with this one during history,” Y/N said.

     “You were writing jokes during history class? No wonder you have a C minus.”

     “It’s not my fault Mr. Sherman isn’t giving me good material. Anyway, it’s all about feminism and how I’m the worst feminist ever,” Y/N said.

     “Okay.”

    “Alright, so, you know how all these girls are upset about getting catcalled. I can’t go five minutes without hearing some girl complain about how a guy whistled at her or fed her a stupid pick up line. Yes, this is probably one of the most common ways that women are degraded by men but you must notice that it only happens to the hot girls. Think about it, when was the last time you saw an ugly girl walking down a street and some guy whistled at her and she rolled her eyes or told him to shut up. Because it doesn’t happen!”

   Jughead started chuckling. “That’s horrible.”

   “I’m not done. When you have a face like this,” Y/N gestured to her own face, “you take what you can get. I am probably the only reason catcalling still exists because when I guy says ‘Yo baby, you got some fries to go with that shake?’, I say, ‘Honey, I don’t just have fries, I also come with a burger and your choice of toy’.”

    Jughead burst out laughing and he held his stomach because it hurt so much. He had tears in his eyes and when he wiped them away, Y/N was smirking. “Do you really say that stuff to guys?”

    “Yes, yes I do. It’s amazing that I’m still single, right?”

    Jughead sighed. “You know, you’re not hideous, Y/N.”

    “Gee, thanks, Jughead. You really know how to make a girl feel special.”

    “I didn’t mean it like that,” Jughead said.

   “Didn’t mean what like what?” Veronica asked.

   She and Betty had just walked in and were standing at their booth.

   “Jughead just said that I was not hideous and it’s probably the most confusing compliment I’ve ever received,” Y/N said.

   “Well, he’s right, you’ve got great legs,” Veronica said.

    “See, Veronica appreciates me!”

   Y/N moved over and Veronica sat next to her. Jughead rolled his eyes.

  “You’re so sensitive.”

   “Your face is so sensitive!”

   “Oh, could you stop being a child for a second?”

   But Jughead had to fight back a laugh since Veronica and Betty were already in stitches. As the two girls laughed, they had genuine joy in their eyes but when Jughead looked at Y/N, there was something missing. They didn’t sparkle like they used to when she told a joke. Sure, she was grinning like a Cheshire cat but when the emotion didn’t reach her eyes, something was up.

   “So, Y/N, do you have any new material?” Betty asked.

   “Yes, but it will definitely trigger all the feminists. It’s going to be great.” Y/N grinned again.

    They quickly fell into a conversation concerning Jason Blossom and Polly which Y/N was barely paying attention to. Whenever Jughead looked her way, she was staring out the window, looking at the pitch black night. Something was definitely wrong but he couldn’t say anything, not right there. 

    Suddenly, her phone dinged and Y/N jumped before answering her phone. Her eyebrows furrowed immediately and then she stiffened.

    “What is it, Y/N?” Veronica asked.

   “I have to go, the maternal parental unit is beckoning me home. I must bid you all adieu.” 

    Veronica let her out of the booth and Y/N turned to Pop’s and told him to make her special to go. 

   “What’s going on?” Betty asked.

   “She’s just worried that something’s going to happen to me if I don’t come home before ten o’clock. Parents, right?”

   “And you will take my suggestions on your catcalling joke?” Betty asked.

   “I’ll see what I can do with fitting the playbook in there but I’d rather not have to worry about the football team coming after me,” Y/N said.

   Betty shot her a look. “Y/N...”

   “Come on, did I not hold the camera while you scared the crap out of Chuck? I am a feminist, Betty, I just like having the door opened for me, I prefer not to pay for the bill at the end of a dinner date, and I really, really like having heavy things carried for me.”

    Betty smiled. “True, I’ll see you tomorrow.”    “Okay, and Jughead, please mention my amazing charm and wit in your novel.”     “We’ll see.”

    Y/N playfully rolled her eyes before strolling away and grabbing her dinner from Pop’s. Archie nearly ran straight into her as she tried to leave and he was entering.

     “Oh, sorry, Y/N! You okay?” Archie asked.

     “Yeah, you just nearly knocked the breath out of me. Someone’s been lifting.” Y/N playfully grabbed his arm and squeezed.

    “You’re leaving already?”

    “When my mom calls, I must answer. You do not want to see that woman angry. She puts Godzilla to shame.”

     Archie chuckled a bit. “That’s too bad. I was hoping we could talk.” 

    “About your deep, passionate love for me that you thought was unrequited for all these years?” Y/N spoke in a mock passionate voice. “Of course, my dear ginger, we will speak about it but at some other time. I really must be off.”

    Archie laughed nervously as he rubbed his hand on the back of his neck. “Yeah, uh, you know me so well. I’ll talk to you later?”

     “Sure.”

   If only she had stayed at the diner a few minutes longer, if only Riverdale High’s talented class clown had decided to stay with her red-headed knight and the rest of us. Then maybe, just maybe, she would have avoided witnessing a tragedy. Nothing changes a person’s life like a parent dying, especially if that parent’s death was because of the other parent.

   Police cars surrounded the humble Y/L/N house and the neighbors were all out in the driveway and on the road, trying to get a peek at what had happened. The sheriff and the rest of the policemen did their best at trying to keep them away, but it wasn’t every day that a man killed his wife in cold blood and their daughter witnessed it. Kevin, Veronica, and Archie were three of the first people there while Jughead and Betty came a few minutes later. No one saw Mr. Y/L/N get led into a police car by the sheriff nor did anyone get a glimpse of Mrs. Y/L/N’s body in a body bag, but everyone kept trying to get a peek.

    “Is Y/N okay?” Jughead asked.

    “I think so, she hasn’t come outside at all, though,” Archie said.

     “I can’t believe this happened to Y/N of all people. She must feel awful,” Veronica said.

    “Part of me thinks this is some sort of horrid, cruel joke or prank, but it can’t be,” Betty said. “I just want to talk to her.”

    “Well, they’re not letting anyone in,” Archie said.

    Veronica turned to Kevin and his eyes widened. “Oh, I don’t know, V.”

    “Come on, Kev, you have strings, pull them.”

    Kevin gave up quickly but managed to convince his dad that at least one of his friends should be allowed to go see her.

    “Who’s the closest to her?” the sheriff asked.

    “Well, Jughead, Betty, and I have known her since we were three,” Archie said.

    “You should go see her, Archie,” Jughead said. “I’m not good in these kinds of moments.”

    “Are you sure? You’re her best friend.”

    “Yeah, I’m sure.”

    The sheriff let Archie through and instructed him to be extremely careful about walking into the crime scene. The CSI team was spread throughout the Y/L/N home, looking for any sort of incriminating evidence against Mr. Y/L/N. It was like a ghost house now because Y/N’s house used to be so light hearted and filled with light. Mrs. Y/L/N would offer Y/N’s visiting friends cookies or other baked goods and would ignore Y/N’s comments about how cannabis would make her baking taste better. Mr. Y/L/N would seem like a threatening shadow since he was about 6′3″ and made of pure muscle----doing four tours in Iraq could do that to a man. However, he seemed to be a big softie when Y/N was around.

    Archie didn’t even know what to say when he would see Y/N. She was never a super sensitive person but she rarely showed any emotion besides being goofy or taking things not too seriously. He wasn’t surprised when he found her leaning against the kitchen wall with her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She looked up when she saw him and smiled.

   “My knight in a shining letterman jacket.”

    Archie couldn’t find the words to speak. They seemed to be caught in his throat and it wasn’t the first time Y/N had such an affect on him. She had done it the first time he saw her in preschool. She had been running away from Jughead because he was upset that she’d tried to steal his hat. She was laughing the whole time and teasing Jughead to come get her. When she ran smack into Archie and knocked him down onto the grass, all he could do was stare into the prettiest y/e/c eyes he had ever seen before in his life. So, yes, Y/N was right about him being in love with her. He just never had the guts to admit it. There was no way he would admit it right then and there. So, he did the next best thing: he held her in his arms.

    Y/N didn’t hesitate to wrap her arms around him and bury her face in his neck. She didn’t cry or shake or do anything that most people would do in that situation. She was just quiet.

     “Are you okay?” he finally whispered.

     “Peachy,” Y/N muttered into his skin. She pulled away a little. “My house has turned into a Law & Order crime scene. I’m just waiting for Olivia Benson to walk through that door and ask me questions.”     He knew it was an attempt to make light of the situation, so he just smiled. “Still joking around.”

    “I have to.” Y/N looked at him. “Hey, so, is everyone else here? I’m dying to get out of this house.”    “Are you sure? Don’t they have to question you?”    “Yeah, but they can’t be too mad at me wanting to get some air,” Y/N said.

   Archie nodded and they walked outside together. Y/N paused for a split second when she saw how many people were standing outside of her house. Then, she strode confidently over to her friends with Archie at her side.

   “Y/N!” Betty, Veronica, and Kevin immediately hugged her while Jughead simply watched on.

    “Don’t squeeze the life out of me, ladies and Kev. I’m fine.” She pulled away from them.

     “What...what happened in there, Y/N?” Betty asked.

      Y/N glanced around before leaning closer to her friends. “There isn’t much to say: my mom told my dad that she was leaving him for the man she’s been sleeping with for the past three months and my dad responded by shooting her in the face.”

   “I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Veronica said.

   “Did you see it happen?” Kevin asked.

   “I heard it. My dad was sitting at the table, drinking a beer while my mom bled out onto the kitchen floor. He called 911 and now we’re here.”

    None of her friends knew how to deal with it, not really. Jason Blossom still had just died but this one hit far too close to home for all of them.

    “I hate to break this up but Y/N needs to come to the station for some questions,” the sheriff said.

    “But she didn’t do anything,” Archie said.

     “Of course not. We just want to clarify the story.”      “I’ll be fine, Ginger.” She squeezed his hand. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”      As Y/N walked along with the sheriff with her head held high to begin strengthening the case against her father, we couldn’t help but be amazed. Most people would have been crying or screaming at that point. But Y/N was still joking around. It was as though none of this had really happened. Then again, Y/N Y/L/N was certainly not like most people, but she still felt grief and sadness, she just wouldn’t show it to anyone for a long time. For the next few weeks to come, Y/N acted completely normal. She continued cracking jokes in class and in the hallways. She would go to the Vixens practice and make fun of Cheryl’s instructions or see the Bulldogs practice and cheer for Archie. When her mother’s funeral came around, her eulogy was full of humor and hope. She didn’t dare mention how her mother died nor that she was having an affair. We all became concerned that Y/N wasn’t displaying grief or any kind of emotion besides happiness at the funeral nor at the wake. In fact, when our dear Pagliacci finally expressed her feelings, it was on a normal night.

     “Just you, Jughead?” Pop asked as he slid him a milkshake.

     Jughead nodded. “It seems as though I’ve been stood up, this never happens.”

     “Maybe she’ll show up, still,” Pop said. 

     “It’s almost nine thirty. She never comes later than eight.”       “Still can’t believe what happened to her. First Jason Blossom and now Y/N Y/L/N. A real shame.’

     Jughead nodded, closed his laptop, and called Y/N.

     “Sup?”

     “Where are you? I’m still waiting for you at Pop’s,” Jughead said.

     “Ha! I probably fooled you, didn’t I? I’m probably busy writing a new joke or I’ve gone underground because I’ve been a spy this whole time. Leave a message at the beep!”

     Jughead groaned and hung up. Y/N never let her calls roll to voicemail. Something was definitely wrong.

     “Hey, Juggie, where’s Y/N? She’s usually with you by now, isn’t she?” Betty asked as she slid next to him in the seat.

     “Yeah, but she isn’t answering her phone.”

      “What?” Veronica asked as she and Archie sat on the other side of the booth. “She always answers the phone, even during class.” 

     “Especially during class,” Archie said. “We have to go see her.” 

     “It might not be a good idea for all of us to rush her at her house,” Jughead said. 

     “But we still all have to go. Y/N’s our friend too, Jughead,” Veronica said.

     “Fine, but we have to do it gently.”

    As they all headed out, Veronica grabbed Betty. “You don’t think she hurt herself, do you?”     “I would say Y/N would never do that but I don’t know. She was always super close with her parents and one of them just killed the other in front of her. There’s no telling what she might do,” Betty said.

    They got to Y/N’s house in record time. Archie rang the doorbell and knocked on the door without any answer. The group quickly got more anxious and Jughead grabbed the spare key under the potted plan on the porch and opened the door.

    “Y/N, are you home?” Jughead called.

   “I’ll try her room,” Betty said.

    “I’ll try her parents’ room,” Veronica said.

    “I guess we’ll all split up until we find her?” Archie asked.

    They nodded and went their separate ways. Betty ended up being right because when she knocked on Y/N’s door, she heard something shifting around.

     “Y/N?” she tried to open the door but it wouldn’t budge. “It’s me, Betty, I just want to know if you’re okay.”     “I’m fine.” Y/N’s voice sounded muffled through the door. “I’m just sitting against the door, I got tired of sitting on my bed.”

    Betty slid down to sit on the other side of the door and texted the others that she had found Y/N. “Why didn’t you meet Jughead tonight?”

    “Oh, that’s what I forgot about. To be honest, Betty Blonde, I don’t have any new material right now. I’d hate to just be critiquing JJ’s work the entire time.”

    “He wouldn’t have minded if you would’ve just called. He was really worried about you. We all were.”     “I’m fine, though. I just wanted to take a nap and then I think I overslept. All I wanted to do was sleep today, honestly.”

    Y/N definitely sounded sleepy and quite sad. The need for sleep was a symptom of depression and it would make sense for Y/N to be depressed in that moment. Betty definitely had to handle this carefully.

    “Do you remember the time that Polly and I got into a big fight and I went to my room crying?”     “You have to be more specific.”

    Betty smiled slightly. “We were eight and I called you because I thought that she would never speak to me again. Then, you came over with your CD player and the soundtrack to the Aristocats and demanded that I dance with you to “Everybody Wants to Be a Cat”. So we dance and sang around my room for hours just listening to that song on repeat. Then, you told me that if Polly didn’t want to be my sister anymore, I would always be your sister. And that’s when I knew that you were my very best friend. You made me forget about my problems and I can only hope that one day I can make you forget about yours.”

    “Yeah, I remember your mom yelling at us for being too loud and then banning me from coming over for a week,” Y/N said. “Did anyone else come with you?”

    “Yeah, Archie, Jughead, and Veronica.”     “Tell them to please not eat all of my food. I can barely cook, let alone shop for food.”

     Betty laughed a little. “Okay, I will.”

     “Thanks.”

     Betty went downstairs and was nearly knocked down by Archie since he was the first one to reach her.

     “How is she? Is she okay?”

     “I think she’s suffering some form of depression. All she wants to do is sleep and she wasn’t motivated to do her favorite thing in the world: write jokes.”

     “That’s so sad. Do you think we could talk to her?” Veronica asked.

     “Yeah, one at a time, maybe,” Betty said.

     And that was how it went, one at a time, the four of us tried to talk to Y/N and get her to let us in, not just into her room but into her mind and emotions. It proved to be a difficult feat. 

    “And I must say, the best thing you ever did was ask Cheryl if all her hair was hers in front of all the River Vixens.” Veronica chuckled. “Her face had to have matched her hair. And it was really nice of you to not judge me because of what my father did. No one really does that in this town.”

    “You’re not your father, Veronica,” Y/N whispered. “You must dress a lot better than him.” 

    Veronica laughed a little. “Do you ever stop joking around?”     “Never.”

     A few minutes later, Veronica walked downstairs and she shrugged. “She seems to be acting fairly normal with me, just a little more subdued.”

    Jughead played with his hands. “She’s definitely down but she’s still acting like she’s not. Maybe I should go to talk to her next.” Jughead turned to Archie. “If that’s okay with you.” 

    Archie nodded. “Of course. She’s more likely to open up to you anyway.” 

    “Maybe,” Jughead said. “She wasn’t very open for these past few weeks, though.”

    “Trust me, she’ll say something to you.” Archie didn’t seem bitter about this at all, rather just sad that Y/N hadn’t really confided in him.

     Jughead opened his mouth to speak but kept it close as he went upstairs to talk to Y/N. He didn’t bother knocking on the door as he sat with his back against it. “So, is your phone dead or something? I called you.”

    “I was asleep.”

    “I heard. Are you having fun in there?”

    “No, not really.”

    “You know what would make it a lot more fun?”

    “Dave Chapelle?”     “No, if you let me in. Come on, Y/N. Two’s better than one.”

     “But there’s five of us in this house.”

     “Yeah, but let’s be honest: you are more likely to let me in than the rest of them.”

    “And why is that?”

    “Because we are the most alike. Because we share so much time together. You don’t have to be so happy all the time, you know. It’s okay to be sad, or melodramatic, as long as it isn’t constant.” 

    There was a long pause and for a moment, Jughead thought he lost her.

    “I don’t like feeling sad, Jughead. It feels like a huge weight is on my chest and shoulders. Joking around makes me and everyone else feel better. How could I be sad?”     “You’re allowed to be upset, Y/N. Especially after what you’ve just been through. It isn’t healthy to keep all this stuff bottled inside or keep joking about it. And it definitely isn’t healthy to try to push the people who care about you away.”

     There a long, tension-filled pause before Y/N spoke again.

     “My dad did four consecutive tours in Iraq. He became a decorated officer in the US Navy and did a lot of covert stuff. I was proud of him, though, because my dad was a big, brave soldier. Mom didn’t feel the same way, though,” Y/N said. “She felt lonely because he was never around for four years. So, she started staying out later and coming home later. I knew about the men, all of them. I’ve never seen them, but I would hear her talking to them when she thought I was doing homework or sleeping. I hated her for doing that to my dad, the hero, and hoped it would stop when he got back. Well, it didn’t because for all three months he’s been back, she’s been screwing some other guy. I wanted to tell him but I couldn’t. He seemed too happy to be home but he wasn’t as happy as before he left. He would get real moody sometimes and real unpredictable with his actions.”

     Y/N sighed. “They started fighting a lot and the more they fought, the more jokes I wrote to try and forget about it. Jokes are an escape because if I joke about it, it’s not real. That night, my mom told my dad that she was leaving him for the guy that she’s been sleeping with for the past three months. His PTSD was triggered and he shot her, right in my kitchen.”

    Jughead swallowed and he could only imagine what Y/N must have been feeling. Suddenly, the door opened and Y/N stood there, looking like a dejected doll. Jughead scrambled to his feet.

    “Then, he sat there, drinking a beer as though he had just shot and killed a dear rather than my mom. He went on a mini rampage throughout the house, breaking things and screaming but he never touched me. All I could do was stare at my mom’s dead body as she kept bleeding until there wasn’t any blood left,” Y/N whispered. “And the worst part is he didn’t say anything to me.”

     And that was the first time I ever saw Y/N Y/L/N cry. She is going to hate that I wrote this, but to be completely honest, it’s necessary to explain the kind of person she is. She has to be one of the most stubborn but funniest people I ever met. To see her so vulnerable and miserable in that moment was nearly too shocking. She cried for about twenty minutes, not wailing or wheezing or making any other sort of sound affect. Her shoulders shook as tears ran down her face and I hugged her, feeling tears of my own well up. Misery certainly does love company.

    When Y/N pulled away, she quickly wiped the tears from her eyes. “Sorry about that meltdown.”

    “It’s fine, I’ve seen you at your worst before.”

    “This isn’t my worst?” Y/N teased gently.

     “No, I do recall a time where you forgot to bring swimming clothes with you to the pool but still jumped in.”

    “Yeah, I spent the whole day soaking wet,”  Y/N said. “But I was seven.”

    “The most stubborn seven year old I’ve ever met.”

    Y/N shrugged. “I’m sorry if I worried you about me.”

    “I wasn’t that worried, but the others thought you might be suicidal.”

    Y/N scoffed. “I could never hurt myself. All the possible ways are horrifying. Plus, I’m a bit of a wimp.”

    Jughead smiled. “Same old Y/N.”

   “Same old Jughead.”

   Y/N followed Jughead downstairs and slowly approached Archie. Betty and Veronica sat up in their seats at the dining table while Archie just kept staring at Y/N, looking anxious.

    “Hi, guys, sorry if I made you think that something bad happened. I was just a little down is all but I appreciate your concern,” Y/N said. “It’s good to know that I’ve got people looking out for me, even if it is this motley crew.”

    They all laughed except Archie who walked slowly towards her as though moving any faster would scare her away. “Please, try not to scare us like that again. I hate to think that something else could have happened to you or---”

    Y/N cut him off by cupping his face in her hands and pressing her mouth to his. Betty looked stunned, Veronica seemed smug,and Jughead fought the urge to roll his eyes.

     “Perfect timing,” Jughead muttered as he walked to stand by Betty.

    Archie kissed Y/N back almost immediately but pulled away. “I, uh, what was that for?”

    “I knew you wouldn’t do it and I felt a little sentimental, Ginger,” Y/N said with a smirk.

     And that is the story of Riverdale’s Pagliacci. While she couldn’t cheer herself up, her friends definitely helped her. 

[tokupedia]

Kamen Rider 45th Anniversary File: Shotaro Ishinomori

1938:

Superman debuts in Action Comics #1

Walt Disney establishes himself as a leading pioneer of animation with the first full-length feature film Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

King Kong Appears in Edo, a jidaigeki take on America’s 1933 King Kong film debuts and is one of the first kaiju/tokusatsu films in history. It is sadly also a lost film as all prints are believed to have been lost or destroyed during the war. The only evidence of its existence are old movie posters, some production photos and archived magazines.

Eiji Tsuburaya briefly works at the Tokyo branch of Toho Studios as head of the Special Visual Effects department, but later leaves and works on war propaganda films for the Japanese government.

Hitler assumed absolute power over Germany by overthrowing the established government. World War II is fast approaching as this evil man spread his philosophies of death, chaos and madness.

The Great Depression hits even harder after almost a decade around the world and would not let up until 1941 and officially end by the late 40s and early 1950s. (though a recession would hit in ‘58)

Japan was at war with China.

And while the world braced for more doom, death and gloom and seeing the absolute worst in humanity....

On January 25th, 1938, Kashiku Onodera and Kotaro Onodera welcomed the newest member of thier family: their second oldest child Shotaro. The Onodera family would later consist of five brothers and an older sister named Yoshie.

Young Shotaro grew up during the second World War and by middle school would be something of a curious artist. He would make manga of his own and his first one published was in 1954 with Second Class Angel. This hobby eventually paid off in 1955 when he got an assistant job from...

Osamu Tezuka!

His tasks were to help the cartoonist on various manga, most notably a story in Tetsuwan Atom aka Astro Boy. 

When not working with Tezuka, Ishinomori would do his own manga adapting classic literary works. Some of the novels would later inspire him for his creations, such as Akumaizer 3, his own wild spin on the Three Musketeers.

While he was a good artist, his family was less than supportive of his work aside from his big sister Yoshie. She was always there for her little brother and cheered him on, even inspiring him to draw. She even visited him while he worked in the Tokiwa-so building in Tokyo and hung out with his fellow artists. Which is all the more tragic, as she died in 1958 from complications of asthma at only 23 years of age. 

This tragedy and the inability to do anything to save her life haunted Ishinomori and some of his female characters are loosely based on the kind of person she was or had bits of her character traits. So in essence, the Pink Rangers, at least in spirit, just may possibly have a part of her that resides in the heroines of Sentai and indirectly; the Morphin’ Grid. Female heroes such as Tackle (whose actress also sadly died of an asthma attack) also could be influenced by the kind of personality she had when she was alive.

On July 19, 1964, Shotaro created Cyborg 009, which launched him into super stardom. 

On April 3rd, 1971, he hit the big time by teaming up with Tohru Hirayama to create Kamen Rider.

From there, he became synonymous with Super Heroes. But Ishinomori was a jack of all trades, he also did dramas, love stories, crime stories, Shoujo, ninja etc. So calling him “The Stan Lee of Manga” while somewhat factual in terms of superheroes, is kind of an insult to his prowess as he was more expansive in versatility than that.

Originally going by Ishimori, Shotaro changed it to Ishinomori in 1985 to celebrate 30 years of working in the media industry.

His influence is just as great as Tezuka, among those who worked for him were:

A young animator named Hayao Miyazaki in the 1960s worked as an artist on some of Ishinomori’s animated films. 

Go Nagai, a student of his and an assistant. Later became a legend in his own right after leaving him in 1967 to create Mazinger Z, Cutie Honey and most famous of all, Devilman! Go Nagai once appraised in an interview that his mentor had a drawing ability that bordered on being superhuman as “He was a genius who could draw five times faster than the average adult artist.”

Kazuhiko Shimamoto

Takao Aoki, the creator of Beyblade (worked on a short story featuring RX and ZO and on the Kamen Rider ZO TV-Kun manga)

Ishinomori was also a lyrical composer, as some of the songs in Kamen Rider were written by him. Even fan favorite songs of his other works such as Taga Tame Ni from the ‘79 Cyborg 009 anime was written by him.

ForestofStone can explain his life a lot better than I can (Credit to her for some of this interesting info!):

http://forestofstone.tumblr.com/post/125974267909/shotaro-ishinomori-the-king-of-manga

Cameos

Despite being in manga, anime and TV, Ishinomori originally wanted to be a filmmaker and went on trips to see landmarks and observe the world around him for inspiration. This gave him better insight into people and inspired his drawings in some cases.

He even decided to take a page from Alfred Hitchcock and make cameos in his TV shows and films:

 Kaiketsu Zubat Ep. 10: A Baseball player

A guest on a luxury cruise in the film Eight Riders vs. Galaxy King.

A Fisherman who gets killed by the monster of the week in episode 84 of the original Kamen Rider.

He also cameoed in video games:

A fisherman in the Kamen Rider Black Movie Hurry To Onigashima. Now sporting a ‘stache with his trademark afro.

His final living cameo in Shin Kamen Rider Prologue as a spy eavesdropping in on the Foundation.

Even after he died, he still is a presence in the works he created. In Cyborg 009: The Cyborg Soldier he appears and interacts with Professor Gilmore (though voiced by someone else).

Shotaro Ishinomori, as drawn by his biggest fan Kazuhiko Shimamoto in a manga.

Of course, all life must end. It is the biological entropy of the universe we can never fully escape as we all must go at some point. And such a creative talent was taken from us far too soon.

But the late Mr. Ishinomori now has two museums made in his honor, a Guinness World Record posthumously awarded for the most comics drawn by a single author, tons of manga artists who view him as a role model and a growing amount of respect from artists in the American comic book industry. 

1998:

Seiju Sentai Gingaman debuts

Ultraman Gaia airs, created by future Digimon Tamers head writer Chiaki J. Konaka

Kids around the world were crazy ‘bout the Pokeymans, some of which were inspired by the Kaiju of popular films in design.

Disney celebrates 60 years of making animated films with their latest feature Mulan.

Superman turns 60 and is sporting an electric blue costume (with a cool shield design but lacking his trademark powers).

Power Rangers in Space airs.

Megaranger vs. Carranger hits VHS

Rebirth of Mothra III, the last entry in the Rebirth of Mothra series premieres in Japanese theaters. 

Ultraman Tiga & Ultraman Dyna: Warriors of the Star of Light acts as the first Heisei film crossover of Ultras and premieres in Japanese theaters.

America made a Godzilla movie. This was a terrible mistake and made a lot of people angry. It also had that Taco Bell dog promote the film by doing a commercial or two. HEERE LEEZARD LEEZARD LEEZARD!

Often fans wonder what would have happened had he lived into an older age.

Well for starters, Kamen Rider would be vastly different given some of his concepts and that Bijinder movie would have been made. Cyborg 009′s story possibly would have been completed over a decade earlier.

Jerry Robinson of Batman fame would have done a crossover with Kamen Rider, having met Mr. Ishinomori in Japan and proposing such in 1996, with possible further collaborations with DC Comics when they had the manga imprint CMX. Shotaro could have taken advantage of Japanese media coming in droves to the US during the 90s Anime boom to do new projects exclusively for America.

So many possibilities, but none can come to pass. But let’s not focus on the “What if’s”, let’s focus on the man’s legacy and pay our respects.

Here’s to you Mr. Ishinomori, without you there would be no Kamen Rider or Power Rangers. Thank you so much for giving us a wonderful world of characters and stories and I’ll do my best to pass them onto others so they too can tell them to the world! エクセルシオール Ekuserushiōru!

[frasier-crane-style]

So that was the Superman Blue/Superman Red storyline and... well, at least it’s over.

It’s an arc that probably wouldn’t even be remembered if it weren’t for Superman Blue sticking his big cerulean snoz into Grant Morrison’s JLA, making everyone ask “what the hell was up with Superman in the 90s?” whenever they wanted to read about Prometheus or shit. 

First off, the first act of Superman being ‘Bluperman’ and getting a hold of his new powers. It boiled down to... a cement block is flying towards a baby. Superman goes “if only I had my heatvision, I could blow it up!” Then blah blah blah magnetic fields and he blows it up anyway. Scintillating stuff.

Then we get to the second act, where Superman is split into Superman Blue and Red... a take off on a famous Imaginary Story where the same thing happened and ‘resolved’ the ‘love triangle’ between Clark, Lois, and Lana (although I personally would think it was a bit of a foregone conclusion once a comic called ‘Superman’s Girlfriend, Lois Lane’ hits a hundred issues). And that works for the child audience and general fable aesthetic of the age--Superman’s in love with two women? What if he just split into two and got together with both of them?

Playing that straight in a modern, serious context and in a continuity-bound stricture like the Superman titles (remember, triangle numbers--it’s one long story stretched along half a dozen monthlies)... it just doesn’t work. Firstly, there’s no love triangle to be teased at. Clark and Lois have gotten married--in one issue, Clark is even shown thinking about children. Meanwhile, Lana’s gone off and married Pete Ross. The closest thing Clark has to some kind of ‘temptation’ is Simone, the ad exec at the Planet who he once bunked with during his college years. Given the likelihood of Superman, of all people, cheating on his wife, that pretty much amounts to her annoying Lois and mostly contributing to the plot by pushing the DP to be more mercenary.

So, realism ensues--to some mild credit; to me it’s pretty boring. Lois basically says she’ll have nothing to do, bedwise, with either Superman (considering the odds that one of them is some sort of impostor, even if not on this occasion, that’s probably a good call). And both the Supermanii are still in love with Lois, so obviously one of them isn’t going to say “have fun with the woman I consider to be my wife!” and peace off to date Wonder Woman or whatever.

What highlights both the puerility and the sexlessness of 90s comics--sorry, but it’s right there--is that just about immediately after the split comes to light, two of Superman’s more romantically inclined Rogues--Maxima and Obsession--show up to explicitly highlight the kinky possibilities of two Supermen... and nothing comes of it (as said above, even Lois isn’t into it). Shit, DC, if you’re going to go there, go there for more than just a few titters and innuendo. Even just a dream sequence where Lois tells the two of them to go to town on her would be something. 

The second problem is the second act. After an eternity of Superman Blue, we barely get any time covering the Red/Blue split before we’re plunged into the Millennium Giants storyline that brings the whole thing to a close (and none too soon, either). It could’ve been really interesting to explore what the world’s like with two Supermen, the same way the Superbooks explored a world WITHOUT Superman for a good long time after he bit it. You could’ve had one Superman on the JLA and another going solo, or one staying with Lois while the other went after crises. I feel like even a single Silver Age issue would’ve had some fun with the concept--more than an entire TPB’s worth of storyline does here.

The third problem is that instead of the two Supermen being identical, it’s a Star Trek transporter accident kinda thing. One of them is brash and headstrong and makes jokey jokes, while the other is more conservative and cautious. Only I don’t think that’s ever been the duality of Superman. There’s a Morrison!JLA storyline coming up where Supes is split into Clark Kent and Superman... that’s the kind of halving you can play with. Or the split in Spider-Man between neurotic responsibility and fun-loving adventure. But Superman I just don’t see as very torn between playing it safe and WITNESS ME!

It doesn’t help that Superman Red’s jokes are terrible. If you want to do Superman as Deadpool, you’d better be damn funny, and that is just not the writers’ forte. Where was Peter David? The one time it’s appropriate for someone to be making constant silly jokes and he’s over writing about Supergirl being an angel.

Also, the Millennium Giants storyline is pretty much a non-starter. Unlike Zero Hour, it actually has an okay premise: there are ridiculously oversized kaiju walking the Earth, unable to be stopped even by the superheroes, so they just try to limit the collateral damage of them going through civilian populations. What would Superman do in a Godzilla situation when he can’t just punch Godzilla?

But it ends up a confusing slurry of 90s event comic. So in the year 2000, giants from various cultures around the world were to wake up, end the current age of mankind, and bring about a new one (why, say, an Incan mythological figure would give a fig about the Gregorian calendar goes unexplained). Because of Superman Blue’s energy, they’re woken up a few years before the millennium--and there’s a storyline that is not futureproof. 

So, wait, Superman is, even inadvertently, responsible for the giants killing 25,000 Naval personnel, for starters? Well, no, we’re told they were going to wake up in 2000 anyway, but him waking them up early gave the superheroes a chance to stop it. Still, feels flimsy. Still not sure why Superman became energy in the first place or now why that specific energy was so special that it caused all that. 

(The Navy thing is also a weird mass slaughter not to get any follow-up. The destruction of Coast City got some remembrance, but these books casually have eight 9/11s take place at once and then... nada. You’d think there’d be some huge uproar, characters who knew or were related to the people who died, superheroes and supervillains launching initiatives of some sort based on this massive death toll... but no, I guess everyone shrugged and said “cost a doing business.”)

[weekendwarriorblog]

ED’s Tribeca Film Festival Diary Part 3 – Wrapping Things Up (Very Late)

The Tribeca Film Festival has been over for weeks now, and it was a moderately decent year, although I was sidetracked by other things to post the last part of my diary. If nothing else, not having a job allowed me to spend a lot more time seeing a variety of movies than I normally do when I have to work on other things for theatrical release.

I saw a bunch of movies, mostly in Chelsea at the Cinepolis Cinemas and SVA Theater because going to Tribeca is still a pain in the butt even though I live downtown. It requires a crosstown bus that only runs certain hours, as I found out when I was left stranded in Battery Park on a Saturday night after the only premiere I went there to see.

Before I get into my final capsule reviews, I want to give a big, big thanks to the wonderful Tammie Rosen, who once again gifted me with a Hudson Pass, which allowed me to get into a lot more public screenings and therefore, see more movies. I probably saw about half press and half public screenings, but I was shocked to not see many press people at the latter, especially with so many of them getting similar access as me. It’s kind of a shame, because you can’t really judge a festival in any given year without making an attempt to see a variety of movies in different sections and especially catch some of the awards winners on the final Sunday. I just don’t see many of the local press taking advantage of this opportunity, so they end up missing many really strong films, even once they finally get theatrical release.

I always have to explain to publicists that I don’t generally cover documentaries at film festivals, and there’s a number of good reasons for this. First of all, few outlets care about doc coverage, mainly because they’re not sexy enough to get the required clicks/traffic that’s so important for a site’s income. I get it. The other reason is that I’m such a fan of the doc genre that very often, almost always actually, docs end up being my favorite thing out of festivals, so it’s rare for me to make a festival “Best of” list that’s NOT topped by a doc. Not exactly fair, but them’s the breaks.

With that caveat, I present two of the best movies I saw at this year’s Tribeca Film Festival…and they’re both documentaries…

It’s a Hard Truth, Ain’t It?

I mentioned this in my capsule review of Madeleine Sackler’s O.G. as a companion doc, but it’s a lot more than that. Frankly, I think this is up there with some of the best docs I’ve seen, which is amazing since it’s essentially a “school project.” Basically, Sackler was teaching a documentary program at the Pendleton maximum security prison in Indiana, allowing a select group of inmates to talk about their stories and what led them to end up in Pendleton for murder, as other inmates filmed them. I’m going to make a confession here, knowing that few people bother to read my blog, but I have a friend in jail who has become my ersatz pen pal over the past few years. I know his story and how he got there, but I also know that he’s not a bad person and he just did something stupid. Hearing the ups and downs of his experience has made me far more in tune with the experience of inmates and ex-cons trying to get back into society.  This is an incredibly emotional film, one that nearly had me in tears hearing all the bad things that happened to some of these guys before they eventually lashed out and ended up killing someone. It’s a fair cop and they rightfully deserve to be in jail, but they all seem to have found redemption, and the fact that they were able to make this doc and get it out to the public makes It’s a Hard Truth, Ain’t It one of the best docs I’ve seen this year and many years, in fact, and it deserves your time and attention, as does…

United Skates

Just as I’d settled into the idea of Sackler’s doc being the best of the fest, I was able to catch this documentary, which won the Audience Award and blew me away just as much. Directed by Dyanna Winkler and Tina Brown, it looks at the rise and fall of the skating rink as a place that brought together the African-American communities in various American cities. I’ll admit that I never really knew much about rollerskating, because I’ve never gone myself, but I found the phenomenon intriguing after seeing it depicted in Malcolm Lee’s Roll Bounce. This doc really gets into the nationwide appeal and tragic death of the roller rink as a community meeting space.  The filmmakers spent a number of years with a number of rollerskating enthusiasts in North Carolina and California, as well as an independent rink owner in Chicago, showing how the resistance to “adult nights” – essentially when African-Americans can go to the rink to show off their fashion and moves to the music they liked – as well as the re-zoning of existing rink locations that have made them a dying breed. This is a very entertaining doc, regardless of your own personal interest in rollerskating. What was interesting about the screening I saw this at was that there was not an inordinate amount of African-Americans in the audience, which probably is more because many moviegoers probably bought their tickets to the screening before knowing which documentary won.  Still, this doc probably has a lot of potential for the right distributor, and I hope it finds one soon.

The Fourth Estate

Tribeca’s closing night film was also a doc, and that was Liz Garbus’ look at the New York Timesduring the first 100 days of the Trump Presidency, the first of a four-part series for Showtime docs that will air later this month. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m not particularly political, nor am I an avid reader of the Times. In fact, I prefer plenty of other New York papers to it, because it always came off to be as high-falutin’ and overly-expensive, and yet, it’s still the best newspaper in the world in terms of quality of content, writing and reporting. I don’t have a ton to say about the movie, as it basically covers similar ground as other docs about the Times, although it’s certainly TIMElier (ha ha) by dealing with the paper’s recent political coverage and how the Washington desk works with (or sometimes against) the higher ups in New York. I’ll definitely be curious to watch the other three parts, though I don’t have Showtime, so hopefully they’ll send me a screener.

To Dust

The narrative Audience Award went to Shawn Snyder’s dark dramedy about a Hassidic man whose wife died and who turns to a science teacher to help him understand what’s happening since her body was buried. It’s a fairly grim and morbid premise but one with enough heart and humor that I can totally understand why it played so well with audiences. It wasn’t my personal favorite movie of the festival, but considering that it premiered out of competition as a Special Screening (possibly to avoid favoritism of it having come out of the Tribeca Institute, maybe?), it was good that it got love from the Tribeca audiences, because I might have missed it otherwise. The film stars Géza Röhrig, who played the title character in the Oscar-winning Son of Saul, as Shmuel, a Hassidic cantor whose wife passed away recently, but he’s been having nightmares about her not resting peacefully after her burial. Unsure of what she must be going through as her body decomposes in the ground, he turns to a science teacher played by Matthew Broderick, to figure out what exactly is happening with his wife’s body. It’s a very dark buddy comedy of sorts as these two men from different backgrounds trying to understand death and decomposition, yet the movie does work.

Ryuichi Sakamoto: Coda

Another Tribeca doc I was interested in, mainly due to my own experiences and passion for music, was this spotlight on the Japanese composer and musician, whose career began with Yellow Magic Orchestra and David Sylvain’s band Japan, which is from where I know him best. Sure, he’s done a ton of soundtrack work and that’s mainly the focus of this film, but it’s by no means a typical “history of” doc, as much as it covers some of his more recent years. It begins with his trip to the Fukushima area where a nuclear power plant exploded in 2011 following an earthquake and monsoon. He was there looking for sound sources but also because he was a frequent ecological warrior in terms of trying to save the earth from the destruction being caused by Godzilla… I mean… man.  A few years later, Sakamoto is diagnosed with throat cancer, although it skips over most of his treatment to pick up in 2014 when he’s trying to find direction for his next record. If you’re a musician or into film scores, this doc from Stephen Schible offers enough of Sakomoto’s process for making music to keep you invested, although it’s definitely a movie for music nerds more than anything else.  MUBI will release this doc theatrically and On Demand in July sometime.

Egg

I was mostly interested in this film because it was directed by Mariana Palka, whose last movie Bitch, while not perfect, was an interesting commentary on gender roles in the family. (And it starred Jason Ritter, who is one of my favorite underrated actors.) This is a very different movie, written by Risa Mickenberg, and it reminded me very much of God of Carnage, not the play, because I never saw that, but the movie by Roman Polanski that had an all-star cast. This is a similar movie about two couples who get together with issues arising the more time they spend together. The first couple is played by David Alan Basche and Christina Hendricks, who are pregnant with their first child, while Alysia Reiner and Gbenga Akinnagbe play their friends Tina and Wayne, who living in a bohemian Brooklyn loft and are having their own baby through a surrogate.  The movie kind of grew on me but really, the best part was when Anna Camp shows up as the notorious surrogate who they’ve been talking about for the last 45 minutes. She brings a much-needed level of humor as the somewhat ditzy but oddly-logical blonde Kiki who really stirs things up. Honestly, this might have worked better as a stageplay, because there’s nothing about it that makes it feel like it necessarily needed to be a movie. I’m sure mileage will vary depending on whether you have had kids or plan to, but it’s not the strongest follow-up for Palka.

Diane

Kent Jones’ narrative feature debut stars Mary Kay Place as the title character, and she’s very good in the role of a middle-aged woman trying to deal with a lot of things at once, including a son with addiction issues, a cousin dying from cancer and more. Jones’ movie reminds me of the work of Kenneth Lonergan, who I’m really not that big a fan of (especially not the much-ballyhooed Margaret), and it’s essentially a character piece that never really goes anywhere. There’s lots of scenes of driving and lots of talking but not really much in terms of plot, as we follow Diane trying to deal with these various things, and quite a bit of time passes over the course of the film. And yet, Jones’ film won the main jury prize as well as awards for screenplay and cinematography. Go figure. I had seen much worthier offerings.  (It also became abundantly clear what was missing from Jones’ film when I watched the similarly-paced but far superior First Reformed from Paul Schrader, although to be fair, Schrader has four decades more experience making films than Jones.)

That should be all for now, as the Tribeca Film Festival is over for another year. I’m not sure if I’ll have a job or somewhere to cover Tribeca for next year, but I think I’ve found a happy medium on coverage in terms of seeing as many movies as possible and writing about all of them. Would love to hear your thoughts on my reviews or other movies, if you get a chance.

[hgfstreamchats]

Gremlins

Welcome to the 'highglossfinish' room. thenightetc: What... is this Knock Out: Excellent question. BBB: ö---ö thenightetc: That sure is a necklace he has there. Knock Out: It sure does exist. Knock Out: If the humans of Toronto have to live with this, so do you. BBB: good that I dont have to hear him.... seing that is already haunting enough..... Ö_ö Knock Out: Is the sound not working? thenightetc: It's working for me. thenightetc: Ahhhh, a nice wholesome christmas movie :) BBB: it surely is, I just can't turn it on at work.... could wake up a co worker ;P Knock Out: That would require some explaining. thenightetc: ...You know, considering what happens later in the movie, I would think that nearly everyone in the city has a story a LOT like this one.  Only with less explanation. Knock Out: ...When you're right, you're right. thenightetc: oh god. BBB: nothings better than greamlins at a dead nigh shift :D thenightetc: Always Be Closing

thenightetc: a tarantula! :D thenightetc: He should have gotten that instead.  Kids love spiders Knock Out: The town probably wishes he'd gotten him the spider, too. thenightetc: Right? Knock Out: I like how his idea of responsibility is locking it up in a box and leaving it where people can see. thenightetc: Right with all the stuff that IS for sale. thenightetc: Maybe the kid should have explained the other two rules. BBB: Well the ddad is not better... buying his son a present? SURE go for the shady chines guy with the strange things XD" Knock Out: Or should lied and said "It will die if you do any of these things." thenightetc: I mean, "don't feed him after midnight" is one thing, "if you feed him after midnight he will literally turn into a chaotic evil horrobeast" is another Knock Out: *Straight up thenightetc: Yeah, but then when he DID get wet and didn't die from it, they'd have known he lied. Knock Out: At that point, what does it matter? thenightetc: They might decide to test the other rule! Starscreamapillar: What is all this then? Knock Out: True. thenightetc: ...On the other hand, I wonder if the kid didn't know the reasons for the last two rules, either. Knock Out: Gremlins! thenightetc: Guy buys his kid a pet at a dodgy store with mysterious rules surrounding it, then everything goes bad. Starscreamapillar: I see. Mysterious pet rules rarely bode well. BBB: but honestly.... tell a kid 'dont do that your pet might multiply AND/OR turn into a monster' might get things just sped up... like.... kids aint smart agoodidstraction: what did i miss thenightetc: "Keep him out of bright light; he hates it and sunlight will kill him.  And keep him away from water and don't feed him after midnight, for reasons I'm not going to tell you." thenightetc: It might have made the guy think twice about buying it in the first place, though. thenightetc: Nobody wants to buy their kid a pet that'll turn into a literal monster! Starscreamapillar: And if you cannot sell a monster to some unsuspecting sucker, then what is even the point? thenightetc: Well, the store owner told him it wasn't for sale.  It was the store owner's grandkid who, suspiciously, got it for him. thenightetc: What the *** is her problem, anyway. Starscreamapillar: I am fairly certain torturing animals to death is not legal. thenightetc: You know from the way the dog just went after her, I have to figure she's been mistreating him in some way already. Starscreamapillar: Likely. BBB: THAT TV..... Starscreamapillar: I am going to predict those swords will be used later to hack up the consequences of poor decisions. thenightetc: Honestly, after the FIRST time that happened, I'd have mounted the swords more securely agoodidstraction: what kind of ant is that thenightetc: god it's like a Furby Starscreamapillar: So it is.... thenightetc: ...Hang on.  He can talk Starscreamapillar: What horror cannot? thenightetc: And he was just being kept as a pet? Knock Out: Oh no. He was being kept in a box in the corner. agoodidstraction: can other ants talk too?? thenightetc: God no. Knock Out: There's no proving they can't. thenightetc: These are purely fictional. agoodidstraction: ants are fictional? thenightetc: These aren't ants. agoodidstraction: that looks exactly like an ant Starscreamapillar: Not enough limbs for an ant. thenightetc: Are you kidding, he looks nothing like an ant. agoodidstraction: like a sugar ant mixed with a snow ant Starscreamapillar: . . . . Knock Out: Sugar snow. Sounds edible. agoodidstraction: Yum thenightetc: That seems like more juice and pulp than one orange should have. Thebes: Hello--oh, hey, Gremlins! thenightetc: Yes! Starscreamapillar: Did he not warn the child about the weird monster in his bed? thenightetc: yikes, that looks... painful. Thebes: well somethimes fantastical creatures in movies come with only just enough warnings to make ignoring those warnings sound like no big deal thenightetc: Uh oh thenightetc: STripe. Starscreamapillar: If they breed this easily, why is Earth not over-run? agoodidstraction: uhhhhhhhhhhh thenightetc: Well, sunlight kills them. thenightetc: Cute.  Yes. thenightetc: TBH it seems like Gizmo.... knows. thenightetc: Like he's the last survivor of what happened last time, and we know there was a last time because otherwise where did the rules come from. Thebes: It's implied he's... been through this before Knock Out: Possibly many times. Starscreamapillar: Hence being locked in a box in a corner in a junk shop? thenightetc: Yes. Windchill: *That feel when you appear at precisely the right moment.* Knock Out: And he was so happy, sleeping in a proper bed and watching his little movies, daring to hope it wouldn't happen again. agoodidstraction: reminds me of school Knock Out: Something wicked this way comes. thenightetc: you didn't "invent" those, dude. Knock Out: Hello, Windchill. Thebes: also how are you going to make money on anything that multiplies with tap water thenightetc: yaaaargh agoodidstraction: ahhh Windchill: *Pocahontas wave* thenightetc: poor puppy agoodidstraction: why are humans addicted to anxiety Windchill: Ew. agoodidstraction: how do they live like that Starscreamapillar: That looks like the sludge the medics drink. BBB: its fun? caffienatedconfetti: what are we watching? thenightetc: dude no Windchill: Well. Windchill: That's disturbing. agoodidstraction: ants Starscreamapillar: Bad decisions in motion. caffienatedconfetti: no but seriously thenightetc: He's gonna regret that later. Starscreamapillar: Gremlins, I hear. caffienatedconfetti: oooooo caffienatedconfetti: no please caffienatedconfetti: no thank you caffienatedconfetti: furbies Thebes: honestly the furbies aren't that bad! Windchill: Oh no, Furbies are on a whole 'nother level. Thebes: relatively Windchill: Way worse than Gremlins. caffienatedconfetti: demons agoodidstraction: how can they be worse? agoodidstraction: these are the weirdest ants i've ever seen Starscreamapillar: I lived through the Furby craze. They didn't multiply that quickly. Windchill: Just see what happens when they run low on batteries. caffienatedconfetti: ants????? BBB: or turn on at night thenightetc: He.... drives places in a tractor? agoodidstraction: alright i'm gonna start a furby collection Starscreamapillar: It is an American tractor. caffienatedconfetti: why ants Windchill: Man. thenightetc: I don't think they're made for street speeds, though agoodidstraction: you know, small furry things Windchill: If people stood outside my house and howled like that, I'd shoot 'em. thenightetc: Now I'm picturing it caffienatedconfetti: ants dont have fur????? caffienatedconfetti: they're tiny bugs Starscreamapillar: Aah. That makes more sense. caffienatedconfetti: they're suder duper small caffienatedconfetti: and also someof them bite thenightetc: Apparently that's not true. thenightetc: ^about the suicide rate caffienatedconfetti: who told you that about ants tho agoodidstraction: i had a fire ant and she bit a lot Windchill: But it WAS super edgy to say. thenightetc: (Anyway this is a furby :) https://img00.deviantart.net/e6a1/i/2004/136/8/2/dissected_furby.jpg ) caffienatedconfetti: ....dude fire ants are smaller than a human's fingernail how did you 'have' a fire ant???? Windchill: Um. Knock Out: Liar. BBB: ouch D: Windchill: Typical. Knock Out: That needle's the size of his entire arm. agoodidstraction: don't ask me, it was anon magic. they gave me a fire ant. Windchill: You're a huge seed pod. agoodidstraction: No you thenightetc: So what does this "fire ant" look like caffienatedconfetti: you don't alk about ants in the singular agoodidstraction: I'm the one with the mohawk caffienatedconfetti: they're always in groups thenightetc: ...You've seen this before, haven't you. Starscreamapillar: Yes, who wouldn't want a box of screaming creatures in their house as pets? agoodidstraction: no agoodidstraction: he looks like me caffienatedconfetti: what' thenightetc: ...just you wait. BBB: thats SO gross BBB: every time... Windchill: That's a little too close to home. thenightetc: oh my god, they have like.  human teeth. caffienatedconfetti: ewwww caffienatedconfetti: oh lorf caffienatedconfetti: no thank you agoodidstraction: lorf Windchill: Who just leaves their sandwich just laying around overnight? Starscreamapillar: A bad scientist. agoodidstraction: I leave my sandwich just laying around overnight all the time thenightetc: Someone unconcerned with food poisoning? Windchill: A lying scientist. BBB: and someone without pets roaming around... BBB: (or roommates) agoodidstraction: ?? whoa caffienatedconfetti: those are some big doo doos Windchill: They look like poops. Starscreamapillar: . . . That never ends well. Smash those immediately. BBB: kinda reminds one of the alien movies XD" Windchill: They look like the eggs in that notoriously awful Godzilla movie. Windchill: 'Cept this film came first. caffienatedconfetti: we oughta watch alien sometime caffienatedconfetti: ripley is badass and a 10000/10 agoodidstraction: why does the phone sound haunted caffienatedconfetti: because its old thenightetc: One of their dad's inventions. thenightetc: He invents stuff that's broken and buggy. Windchill: To watch any of the Alien films is to sit through several hours of people discussing their oviposition kinks. Starscreamapillar: They have their own Que. Windchill: No thanks. agoodidstraction: what now caffienatedconfetti: ewwww Thebes: wait there's movies on the internet that don't result in people discussing their kinks? Starscreamapillar: Failed inventor who won't stop making garbage. Windchill: ...Probably not. caffienatedconfetti: starscream's throwing shade thenightetc: Accurate description agoodidstraction: hey garbage to greatness Windchill: Who's this, the Wicked Witch? thenightetc: Pretty much! Windchill: Fantastic. caffienatedconfetti: welp i have something importaant tomorrow, i'm just dropping by Windchill: Gross. agoodidstraction: see ya caffienatedconfetti: and it seems im leaving at jusr rhew right time thenightetc: Goodnight! agoodidstraction: don't let the ants bite caffienatedconfetti: goodbye Knock Out: Goodnight! thenightetc: I feel sorry for Gizmo.  He knows what's coming, but he can't communicate it to anyone who could do something about it. Starscreamapillar: Why couldn't he? He speaks. Windchill: Maybe he's just stupid? Knock Out: He's incapable of saying anything that isn't adorable. thenightetc: Yeah, but he only seems to know a few phrases.  Maybe he doesn't fully understand the language, or maybe he isn't physically able to say more words than that. Windchill: Maybe...it's for plot convenience. BBB: maybe like a parrot? Windchill: Turn on the lights you absolute madman. Starscreamapillar: I feel this man is being reckless in handling his unknown monster. Knock Out: I'm surprised he didn't rat them out when they were making a fuss for food. Knock Out: He clearly knew it was after midnight, he turned down the chicken. agoodidstraction: caca BBB: horror movie rule 2: never turn on the light, it might be a good idea... Starscreamapillar: Admittedly, they know that these things dislike the light. thenightetc: Yeah, they seem to have a sense of when midnight is and know what happens BBB: .... but when does the midnight rule end? Starscreamapillar: Surprise surprise, the black man did not survive the movie. Knock Out: Sunrise, maybe? Windchill: It's like Jurassic Park all over again. thenightetc: That would make sense, although who knows really. Windchill: 'Cept this film is older. BBB: would make sense! Thebes: probably goes from midnight to sunrise, since, you know. light kills. Windchill: Wow. thenightetc: My theory is they're some kind of fairy, and operate on fairy-tale logic. Windchill: At least she's thinking ahead, but I doubt that's gonna be enough. Thebes: listen to the distressed muppet, 80's mom! Avoid! agoodidstraction: too high for this thenightetc: At least he managed to tell her the important part first Starscreamapillar: That fist. Windchill: Someone's got the right idea. Windchill: If it were me, first thing I'd do was eat all the cookies too. agoodidstraction: what Knock Out: It's got its priorities in order. Starscreamapillar: She could have fled the house by now. They have a front door. Thebes: ... so I'm sorry in advance but--THIS WEEK, ON DOES IT BLEND agoodidstraction: oh no agoodidstraction: ahhhhhhhhhhh Windchill: She's doing a number on 'em so far. agoodidstraction: yeah two knives agoodidstraction: swish swish *** Starscreamapillar: But she is alone. All it takes is one slip up, and she is without backup. BBB: aww missed the fun part XD Windchill: I think the cookie pan shield and a knife was a better loadout. agoodidstraction: there i am Windchill: I always knew trees were bad news. thenightetc: Swords prominently in ferame thenightetc: YEP Starscreamapillar: I was right. Windchill: Wow. agoodidstraction: me Windchill: Grotesque. agoodidstraction: bye Windchill: He's gone. Windchill: You could hear the sound of his little feeties. Windchill: Vanishing into the night. Windchill: So...he went back alone? Starscreamapillar: He's stupid. Windchill: Moron. thenightetc: can hear him thinking like, "jesus christ mom" as he looks over the carnage Starscreamapillar: Walking the street with a sword, and a monster in your bag. Yes, that isn't suspicious. Starscreamapillar: No one has called the police about the corpse still in the school. Windchill: *Temptation to sing Y.M.C.A. rising.* agoodidstraction: me going for a swim thenightetc: And there's you having a million evil babies. Knock Out: If a glass of water was agonizing, I can't imagine how much that one hurts. Starscreamapillar: Apparently worth it, to spawn an army. agoodidstraction: i'm a proud daddy Knock Out: A million clones of yourself. agoodidstraction: just what i need agoodidstraction: more *** clones Windchill: Amazing. Thebes: KID, BRING PROOF Starscreamapillar: He's got a few dead ones at home he could use as evidence. thenightetc: Yeah, that's true.  He could have brought those Windchill: It's already dark in there, what the heck. agoodidstraction: yum yum Knock Out: Wheeljack hitting the town. agoodidstraction: me n my clones Windchill: Nice ride. thenightetc: I love this music, though. agoodidstraction: party Starscreamapillar: Death by failing to actually flee. Windchill: Did...they not have a back door? thenightetc: "Monsters, you say?" Starscreamapillar: "Accident" Windchill: *SNORTS* Starscreamapillar: Of course, she has cats. thenightetc: Hey!  Cats are actually great. Windchill: They better be nice to the cats. thenightetc: It's not THEIR fault she's a horrible person Windchill: What a reaction thenightetc: Wait is she saying she thinks they're literal demons, from hell thenightetc: Hhahahaha agoodidstraction: frag hahadls agoodidstraction: aaaaaaa BBB: wtf O___o Starscreamapillar: *Snrks* Windchill: Oh my god. BBB: santa!!! agoodidstraction: hahaaha Windchill: As usual, the police are useless. Starscreamapillar: Yes, leave the man to die. Thebes: to be entirely fair, pirahna-muppets are outside most people's experience agoodidstraction: wow Thebes: to the degree they probably didn't check the trunk, for instance agoodidstraction: that's a lot of dead people Starscreamapillar: A fine holiday massacre. thenightetc: "Hey!  You're not Rockin' Ricky fans!" thenightetc: oh my god thenightetc: here he goes again Windchill: Amazing. Windchill: These guys know how to party. agoodidstraction: oh yeah Starscreamapillar: Reminds me of the Nemesis, before it crashed. agoodidstraction: ha Knock Out: I wish. agoodidstraction: that's what it's like at knock out's place thenightetc: ...I wonder how they can drink beer without multiplying. Windchill: It flashed her. Windchill: Indecent. Starscreamapillar: The same way the snow isn't working? thenightetc: ...I didn't even think about the snow. thenightetc: I wonder if they're not warm enough to melt it. Knock Out: That one's Bumblebee. agoodidstraction: hahahaha BBB: pfffft Starscreamapillar: What is your Bumblebee like?! agoodidstraction: he's cute Knock Out: And chronically stressed, as of late. agoodidstraction: big optics Windchill: I'm surprised nobody's gotten shot yet. agoodidstraction: yeah BBB: aaaand finally work, have fun guys. bye agoodidstraction: see ya Starscreamapillar: Goodbye. Knock Out: Glad you could drop in! Windchill: There we go, her brain's working. thenightetc: Goodnight! agoodidstraction: were they paying? why was she serving them hahaha thenightetc: So they wouldn't attack her. agoodidstraction: tiny guns Starscreamapillar: Not so threatening when they can be defeated with a good flashlight. Knock Out: Where did they even get the tiny guns? Starscreamapillar: Tiny gun store. agoodidstraction: hahaah the whole town jvhfdlashjfkds Knock Out: Checks out. Starscreamapillar: The security on this bank is just atrocious. Windchill: *Raises brows.* Starscreamapillar: . . . . thenightetc: *wince* Knock Out: PFFTHAHAHAHA! Windchill: What kind of moron tries to climb down a chimney. Starscreamapillar: Ha! Knock Out: Gizmo's jealous because they know how to party. thenightetc: ...I wonder what "mogwai" actually means.  Is he just, like, a pokemon that keeps saying his name?  Or does it mean something. Windchill: Look at them, they're so excited. Starscreamapillar: It seems to be Cantonese for 'Monster'. Knock Out: "Monster." thenightetc: Ahhh Knock Out: Or spirit, demon, and so on. Starscreamapillar: Why do they like the movie? thenightetc: They like music. agoodidstraction: ME agoodidstraction: gotta have candy Windchill: That's any sane person's reaction to seeing "CANDY" in big neon letters. Starscreamapillar: It is traditional to explode one's problems. agoodidstraction: ^ thenightetc: Is this the time? Starscreamapillar: Bleck. agoodidstraction: wow Windchill: Heh. thenightetc: It sounded like he was trying to say something, there thenightetc: But couldn't quite pronounce it thenightetc: Wasn't it night just a few minutes ago? Knock Out: I like how his voice bears a striking resemblance to Megatron's. Starscreamapillar: Indeed. agoodidstraction: yep Windchill: Is that a  Barbie car. Windchill: *Snickers.* Windchill: Me. Starscreamapillar: Yes, those department store guns. Starscreamapillar: Loaded department store guns. agoodidstraction: glug glug Windchill: Ugh. Thebes: snow shovels DO NOT WORK THAT WAY agoodidstraction: oh agoodidstraction: uhh agoodidstraction: ouch thenightetc: It's you! agoodidstraction: me when soundwave takes my soul Windchill: *Snickers.* Windchill: *Again.* thenightetc: Uhhhh, kid.... Windchill: Leaping Skeleton? agoodidstraction: primus Windchill: Called it. Starscreamapillar: Well, that looked painful. thenightetc: Maybe they're undead. thenightetc: Yes.  Mass hysteria. Starscreamapillar: 'Accidents'. There's a fair number of dead people that need to be accounted for. thenightetc: That explains all the monster corpses. Knock Out: "Moolah!" thenightetc: Ha! Thebes: because clearly, this is the big problem thenightetc: that's not a gift Windchill: "Nature's gifts." Starscreamapillar: He's not really wrong. Thebes: HEY MAYBE IF YOU EXPLAINED WHY NOT TO DO THOSE THINGS, LESS PEOPLE WOULD BE DEAD agoodidstraction: aw Knock Out: I like how he calls the old man "Baba." Starscreamapillar: Sorry does not raise the dead. thenightetc: Pfffffff thenightetc: Or rebuild everything they destroyed. Starscreamapillar: Matrix dust, now that is what raises the dead. thenightetc: "...Well, it's probably my fault" Windchill: I thought that was Dark Energon. Windchill: And Mad Science. Starscreamapillar: I wouldn't know, we do not have Dark Energon... Yet. thenightetc: How ominous? Windchill: There was a sequel. Thebes: Someone attempted to market them again. Violence ensued Knock Out: It's not terrible. We'll have to watch that one someday. agoodidstraction: please agoodidstraction: night everyone Knock Out: Goodnight, everyone. Thank you all for coming! thenightetc: Goodnight! Starscreamapillar: As always, that was weird, but enjoyable. Thank you for having us. thenightetc: Thank you for hosting!  This movie's a good time. Knock Out: My pleasure. Thebes: thank you! Windchill: *Another wave.*