#I WANT HER TO STAY ALIVE THO
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so anyway, Dame Aylin flying out of the SHADOWREALM to gaze over the very slaughtered last light inn, then going to moonrise towers to fuck shit up...
meanwhile jaheira having DURGE walk up to her outside moonrise, knowing they killed ALL of her harpers, but still willing to fight alongside them anyway...
and then holding the first floor for them and being willing to go confront Bones McSadMan together with them DESPITE EVERYTHING...
the enemy of my enemy isn't my friend, not at all, but they're absolutely useful for the greater good, so let's just go fuck shit up
#Baldur's Gate 3#jaheira#SHE SAID SOME OF THE SADDEST LINES OUTSIDE MOONRISE TOWERS#''my harpers are all dead. they exist only in the shadow theater of my mind now.''#or something like that#fuck man i'm so sorry LMAO#I WANT HER TO STAY ALIVE THO#I SAVE SCUMMED JUST TO MAKE SURE SHE DID#DESPITE THAT FIGHT BEING A PAIN IN THE DICK#i really hope Dame Aylin punches a hole into DURGE's chest#when she finds out they killed her FUCKING WIFE ON A WHIM LMAO
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#diary#i took a short walk after picking up my package#and i looked up and then saw this lovely lady#she just came out of the forest and just walked right up to me and didnt even smell me before demanding pets#i leaned down to pet her and then she not only did that thing when they stand on the hind legs and buff your hand#she even reached up to me and like put her paws on my leg :((((((#so i had to sit down and she even jumped up on my one knee that was like a bench 😹#she was so so so so so sweet and i spent a good amount of time just sitting on the ground and petting her#i didnt take better pictures bc there were quite a lot of ppl around. like running and walking by.#and like no one cared but i am so socially anxious lol i hate it. i got these at least bc i wanted to remember this moment <3#she is the most cuddly cat i've ever met outside tbh#like she even jumped up on me and wanted pets the same way my cat who knows me does#this lady was a stranger skksks. but this moment made me so happy#it is moments like these im reminded why i stay alive. bc of all the animals i will meet#i cant help but worry abt all animals to the point where ppl hate me lol but this world's humans is not kind to animald#so im really hoping she has a good life :((((( <3333 she has the sweetest soul omg.#im thankful she gaveme this moment and brightened my life tho :')))))#lol mostly moments with animals and nature move my soul and these things are rare for me so i need to appreciate it when it happens
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Being a mother is a huge responsibility and stars above am I so full of anxiety but also this is the best thing ever
#Cat mom I did not birth a child#I want to cry!! These r babies!!! They need me to stay alive!!#One of them wasn't eating and I was so so scared. I was putting too much solid food in her food tho#Shes a bit younger than the other cat and needed more milk mixed wt hers to eat it#Ough........ kitty.........
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plane scene is so funny cause why is mine a sleeper agent that wakes up whenever daigo is mentioned
can’t wait to see it in dragon engine :3
mine has been the winner for Funniest Character Imaginable for 15 consecutive years and i have yet to see anyone come close i fear
#snap chats#originally i wrote 'funniest character alive' and then remembered. HAH im so funny //throws up//#all my fave charas know how to do is get crazy on planes over men they love its disgusting#utterly hilarious cause after making the last post i went on twitter and they mentioned ANOTHER plane scene i throw up over#diff franchise so not important it is just SIMPLY funny how coincidences work and further confirming I Have A Type#BUT NO BACK TO MINE IT'S STILL SO FUCKIN FUNNY I HAVE TO REWATCH IT#i have to replay it .... all of y3 ...#if anyone remembers my friend from college and how we used to stream she asked me if we could stream#and i was like 'girl i havent streamed in Fuck Ever huh' and yk what maybe i'll stream y3 with her#at the very least ill stream y3 for myself ... legend mode .....#ive beaten y3 legend mode one (1) time and it was the worst experience of my life because if its not shadow the hedgehog#i am not good at the game i am playing !!!!!!!!!!! it'll be funny tho#i remember wanting to do a y3 drinking run but i told myself id stop drinking so i simply think. i will substitute drinking for hot sauce#its an idea im ironing out and i also have to like. properly set up a twitch- or maybe ill stream through youtube#ive always liked youtube streaming more ... at least as a viewer#these are all details for plans i will not be enacting literally any time soon can i stay on topic#the topic being i love mine. i love that plane scene forever the casual Whats Goin On Here :)#and he is the embodiment of :) in that scene casue :] is gen friendly but :) has an underlying aura of Im Going To Kill You#thats him in that scene. and i love him. for the third time. im ending this post now forever and always stan mine#if and whenever y3k comes out i cant wait to see !! but i personally believe that's well and away from us at this point#not impossible since they did mention it but yk. i dont think itll happen within the next year or two#maybe next five or ten realistically. if that jVLAEKJVLAEKJ ok bye fr now
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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it#my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with#and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l#lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am#glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone#since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life#he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even#harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken#about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better#my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he#hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his#personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the#nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off#he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he#still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay#long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart#i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him
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my brain started cooking up narumina high school au and now i kinda have to write it
au where mina is part of a shooting club (don’t know if this is a Thing or sport in japan but it is in some places so) and she’s the Only Member. the only other member (kafka) graduated before they could do it together so . it’s just her now and Has been her ever since her first year (she’s a second year now)
cue: narumi. annoyed. frustrated. angry. at some stupid shit the teacher said about him skipping classes or playing games in class and the baseball club doesn’t want to let him use their bat and he’s not a member bc they have practice and he doesn’t have any other outlet so he’s trudging along the school compounds walking further and further away from the main buildings when he hears a loud Bang
he doesn’t know what it is, but he plays enough games to recognize a gun going off. he doesn’t run, just finds his aimless walking a bit more pointed. more motivated. as he walks in the direction of the noise
there he finds. to his surprise. a shooting range. there are targets placed on the opposite stretch of the …?? grass?? idk i’m visualising a setup similar to archery rn but once i do more research this is subject to change the MAIN part is that the targets all have bullet holes in them and they’re ALL bullseye
he drags his eyes away from the targets and finds the source of the damage.
a girl with short hair he feels like he’s seen before Somewhere and she’s in her pe uniform the jacket sleeves rolled up to her elbows with the little googles and headphones on and narumi watches in (he hates to admit it) admiration as she loads up the gun with such precise accuracy he can’t follow with his eyes and the next moment he hears another resounding bang
“holy shit.” he finds himself saying and in the next moment the pin drop silence as she aims at the next target is broken because she turns to him immediately.
thankfully the gun isnt pointed at him, and she’s kept her arms in position. the only thing that’s moved is her head and narumi sees the pure confusion on her face and wonders if he’s somehow walked so much he isn’t on the school grounds anymore
“oh.” she says, and puts the gun down and pulls the headphones off her head and keeps them resting around her neck. “it’s you.”
and narumi knows what that tone means. she knows him. he doesn’t know her though.
narumi hates to think about how his face must scream confusion because she follows up before he can say anything with: “we’re in the same class.”
he doesn’t attend classes often. or at all really. so that’s why she seemed a bit familiar. like a blurry after image.
“what is this place,” he says, not a question because narumi doesn’t ask questions, he simply gets answers.
“a shooting range.”
“i’ve never heard of a shooting club in this school.”
“because it doesn’t exist.”
he waits for an explanation. because a building so obviously made to host students or whoever with all this equipment and yet there’s no club?? narumi doesn’t believe it. but he doesn’t think she’s lying to him either.
she takes a painfully long time to find her words, or maybe she just doesn’t want to talk to him, because she keeps her eyes trained on the targets far away.
“i’m the only member. so it doesn’t exist.”
narumi thinks he’s heard somewhere that school clubs need a minimum number of members. he never really cared though. since his after school activities consisted of doing what he does during school hours - play games, pick fights, etc. he doesn’t go to school in the first place. so he doesn’t need an after school club.
he looks at the guns lined up. they’re all clean. he looks around him. everything is spotless. no indication of abandonment.
“well. i don’t care about your circumstances,” he says, and points at the gun she was holding. “i want to shoot too.”
he recalls the image of his form teacher, or maybe it was his science teacher, narumi doesn’t know - he doesn’t even know why he came to school today
(but he does. it’s because they kept begging him to attend at least once a week and narumi can’t say no to family)
but that teacher. with his bald head and smoker breath just kept on saying he should be more responsible blah blah he’s almost a third year god what does narumi care? he shouldn’t even have lived this long but here he is! and just thinking about it has narumi balling his fists up in anger.
“you need to be a club member.”
“does that really matter.”
“yes.”
she’s finally looking at him again. and narumi observes how she has really round eyes. a mole under each one. despite looking pretty innocent, she seems to be serious about this, mouth drawn into a frown and eyebrows furrowed.
narumi can’t really be bothered but he has so much pent up energy. and shooting a gun sounds really fucking awesome.
“okay. whatever. just let me shoot.”
she hurries off somewhere, through a door narumi hadn’t really noticed before and he takes off his school jacket, rolling his sleeves up.
he observes the equipment on the table, and then sees there’s spares in a nearby box. those will have to do.
as he puts on the goggles, he looks around for headphones, ear muffs, whatever, narumi knows their purpose - doesn’t need to know what they’re called but can’t find any.
the girl. he doesn’t know her name still. not that it matters. returns with a piece of paper and he almost barks out a laugh
“fill it in.”
“you’re not gonna tell me to wait until it’s approved before i get to shoot, are you.” he glares at her, because narumi seriously doesn’t want to wait any longer. he wants to let out all these restless energy now.
“i’m the one approving new members.”
“you’re not a teacher.”
“i’m a good student.”
he doesn’t know what the fuck that means but it manages to piss him off a bit more so he scribbles his details into the damn form and shoves it at her.
“approve it.”
“say please.”
he feels himself snap.
“are you trying to piss me off?”
she’s not the least bit intimidated. in fact she doesn’t look away from his glare. most people in the orphanage would have run away by now. and she repeats herself, “say please.”
he takes one look at the gun on the table. the guns on display. the painstaking effort of keeping all these equipment clean despite no one using them. the painstaking effort of keeping a club no one cares about alive.
“please approve the fucking form.”
if she has a single thing to say about it, she doesn’t. she doesn’t say anything. takes a stamp out from her jacket pocket and stamps his club registration.
it takes him a bit later to realize he’s joined a fucking after school club.
he’s being handed a gun, similar to the one she was holding and he grabs it. she doesn’t tell him to watch and follow when she starts loading it up. he got the memo the moment she side eyed him and started preparing, much slower than she had earlier when she was alone.
that annoys narumi a bit.
but he follows everything to a tee. commits the steps to his memory. doesn’t know why. doesn’t think he’ll be back. but he makes sure to remember anyway.
she looks around the area for a bit, as narumi feels the weight of the gun in his hands.
while he’s distracted, he doesn’t realize she’s in his personal space until she is, and he has to hold back from throwing a punch.
their heights aren’t that different, which adds to narumi’s list of annoyances from today, and he takes the split second to calculate how tall the girl must be. above 165cm that’s for sure.
how surprising, she’s got a baby face, so narumi had expected her to be shorter.
when her face is finally drawn away from his, he feels the weight of something around his neck and understands what had happened. she could’ve just passed the ear muffs to him though.
what a weirdo.
she puts her own earmuffs on, and narumi mirrors her actions.
she shifts her stance, and he follows.
she shoots and narumi forgets how to breathe.
the atmosphere around her changes for the split second she releases the trigger, and for once - narumi feels fear.
everything seems to move in slow motion, as he watches her. her face. her eyes narrowed. concentration the only thing there and time resumes as the bullet pierces through the air.
narumi doesn’t have to look to know she’s hit bullseye again.
it’s a challenge. to him, at least. he knows she probably doesn’t care about him. but narumi wants to shoot like that too. so he takes a deep breath and steadies himself and pulls the trigger.
“you’re surprisingly bad.”
not a single bullet hit even remotely close to the center of the target.
“aren’t you just absurdly good?! who the fuck hits bullseye consecutively? look at all your targets!” he screeches, tugging the ear muffs off.
“kafka-kun did say i was weirdly accurate…” she muses, has to think about it- as if she wasn’t aware. as if she only had this realisation.
narumi wants to sock her in the eye or something.
he lets out a deep sigh. at least he released his pent up anger. although he’s kind of angry at a whole other thing now.
“so? what the hell are you doing here if you’re this good. there are competitions aren’t there.”
he doesn’t know why he’s making conversation
“i’m just taking care of the club.”
“the club that doesn’t exist.” he points out.
“i made a promise.”
and narumi remembers he’s not the type of person to give a shit. so he shrugs, ending the conversation.
he refuses to ask for help. for advice. so he keeps his eyes on her as she shoots, and narumi thinks there’s no need for her to train at all. her. accuracy is crazy. he doesn’t know why she even bothers coming here.
by the end of the day, two hours later, he’s managed to get a bit better. or so he likes to think.
he can’t believe he stayed until the sun is about to set. in school.
as she starts cleaning up, narumi finds himself mimicking her actions, the same way he has been doing the entire time.
to his own surprise, his back is sweating, and it must’ve taken a bit more effort than he’d considered.
“ashiro!” somebody calls, and narumi nearly jumps out of his skin. he doesn’t get surprised though. so he pretends he isn’t.
ashiro. he says the name in his head. so that’s who she is.
doesn’t ring a bell.
“hoshina.” she says, and despite a friend (?) - narumi presumes, showing up to this side of the school - she doesn’t smile.
in fact, narumi doesn’t think she’s seen her make any sort of expression that wasn’t a straight face or brief concentration.
well. not that he cares.
“who’s that?”
she looks over to him.
and he looks back at her.
“narumi. from my class.”
so she does know his name.
“ahhh the problem child?”
this guy is pissing him off.
“and who the hell are you? club activities ended ten minutes ago, for your information.”
he doesn’t know if they did end ten minutes ago. but it’s when ashiro started packing up. so he assumes that’s the case
the guy laughs - loud and annoying and narumi held back against punching ashiro but he won’t back against this guy.
“you bastard-,” he growls, walking up to him and glares at ashiro who stops him.
she doesn’t stop him. per say. doesn’t say anything really. but she’s moved closer to him. and she has one eyebrow raised.
“whatever.”
he doesn’t know why he stops.
narumi gen doesn’t stop for anyone.
and that annoys him even more. his list is pretty long now.
longer than it should’ve been.
“so you managed to increase your club numbers? good for you.”
it sounds so sarcastic, but narumi knows it’s not. everything just kind of sounds like shit when it comes from that guy.
“i’m not-,” narumi starts, and then stops. that’s twice now. “i’m not.”
ashiro holds the piece of paper up. the fucking club form and points at the stamp in red. “he is.”
“i’m not coming back here.”
“you probably should though? your aim doesn’t seem to be the best.”
the guy says, and damn this fucking bowlcut guy because the next time he speaks narumi will definitely slam this guy face’s into the wood floor.
“hoshina.” she says, and the tone is a warning. narumi doesn’t need somebody else giving out warnings for him. “your aim is just as terrible.”
“but i’m not a member of the club.”
“he’s new.”
narumi doesn’t know if she’s insulting him or defending him. doesn’t think he’d like either option.
the guy shrugs. before looking at ashiro. “are you done? let’s go.”
she nods and turns to him. they walk out together.
ashiro locks up, and narumi leans a little away from her to take one last glance at the shooting range.
“see you tomorrow, narumi.” it’s the first time she’s addressed him by name. even though she knew it.
“i’m not coming to school.”
“you’ll be here though.”
she doesn’t have to specify for him to know she means here - as in the shooting range.
“i’m not coming to school.” he repeats.
she shrugs, like she already knows.
narumi watches as the two leave, talking about something he can’t hear from where he is, still standing by the door of the shooting range.
he’s not coming back tomorrow.
“you’re here.”
“took you long enough. unlock the door.”
“i told you so.”
“shut up.”
#egg boils#let me dump the entire scene that occured in my brain during my shower so i don’t forget#idea bank#what the hell happened this wasn’t supposed to get so long i laughed#my brain…#i’ll copy it over to google docs later#narumina#also mina keeps the club alive bc kafka wants it to stay alive and i Know a shooting club and KAFKA? but idgaf my world#i just think she’d be good at it but has no motivation other than keeping it going. keeping the equipment clean#she doesn’t want other people joining tho. that’s why she doesn’t put posters up. it’s her safe space. her secret sanctuary#and then comes narumi stumbling in. but she doesn’t mind. mina is shocked she doesn’t mind. the only person she hadn’t minded was kafka#and yeah idk maybe they go to competitions together i didn’t think that far
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to be completely honest i sometimes forget that there are people who actually think akechi died bc my friends and i are so delulu about it that we're just like. of course he isn't actually dead. there's just no way. even akira himself is delulu about it with that "it's akechi's glove... he promised me a rematch. ...my fight with akechi isn't over yet." on march 19th. he is perfectly fine he told me himself <3
#squishy talks too much#squishy plays p5r#p5r spoilers#it's the way i immediately had to be told about all the akechi alive theories#after shido's palace#bc otherwise i would scream cry throw up and not finish the game#anyways AKECHI IS ALIVE SO PUT HIS ASS IN P5T LIKE THE PEOPLE WANT!!!!!!!#and sumire. i truly believe sumire was the most injusticed by this even tho i don't bring her up as explicitly#whatever. idc about the new game#my akechi mutuals and i will STAY DELULU#considering everyone wants akechi in the game#from what i've seen on twitter#i think they need to either FIGURE SOMETHING OUT#or just stop making p5 stuff#but that's just me#about akechi. i guess
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#i just realised i will have to chose between my Hawke dying in the fade or Alistair dying in the fade#(they die if you let them there right ?)#all that cause i didnt make Alistair king (he didnt want to and huh idk im selfish i wanted him for myself)#1st time i played inquisition was in 2021 and i hadnt played the 1st 2 games so i prbly had Alistair as king by default and didnt know shit#about the lore anyway. so i just did stuff vibing. i think i remember leaving orlaisian moustache guy in the fade cause i thought hawke#looked cooler + hawke being varric's friend and all#but guys i dont want to let my pookie Alistair die + i need the wardens etcc. Like my hawke is useless right ? he's my character anyway#but if i let him die. varric sad. AND FENRIS ALONE :((((((((((((#but it makes more sense for hawke to stay behind storywise#does he really die if i let him in the fade ???? 2021 was not a good year for me. i barely remember anything about any media i played or#watched that year. tho in that case it may be bc i didnt understand shit to the story. not knowing the lore and all#also love my warden. i dont want to let the love of her life Alistair the cheese man die#(funny i never got to the cheese scene in origins. but he does look like he likes cheese)#but i also love fenris and my hawke's romance#anywayysss i read on the internet that hawke doesnt necessarily dies if you let him in the fade ??? chat is this true .??#edit : chat it wasnt true. stupid google results. it was just someone maling a theory#also very funny to replay inquisition now knowing the lore and being very invested in it#i - of course- am a basic bitch and am playing a twink white haired dalish elf. romancing Dorian#(to be fair. i would like my elf to be a twunk but the game doesnt let you. all elves must be shaped like a twig. it's thedas law)#he's a rogue. and also literally the same character i played back in 2021. like a tried to reproduce his face and all#(I 1st played on ps4. but then one day it was free on epic games so i took it and i am now playing on pc)#(didnt have a good pc back then)#im rambling. trying to make up my mind#prbly gonna let my hawke in the fade even if the wardens are a bit useless at the moment. thinking of the futureeee. also reddit theory guy#is right. im sure my hawke can find a way to get his ass out of the fade. he's resourceful and a mage#Alistair would prbly really die. like he can die against the archdemon in first game. on the other hand hawke is the most unkillable member#of his family. guy never dies#idk Anders could help find him. i let him alive cause i mourn who he once was. (awakening anders my beloved) (i mean i also like da2 Anders#but I know he's written to be annoying). Anders finding my Hawke would make Fenris absolutly mad tho. Or they could team up you know what#personal
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do you think he even realized he had been Betrayed at first?
even when Rook is rescuing him, he still insists he originally had a contract on Calivan, as if that's why he was here. and he has to complete the contract--he can still work!
so how long did he try to convince himself that no, this is still according to plan, no one sold him out, and if--hypothetically--a certain someone who would be the only one to know the details of his contract DID tell the Venatori which ship to target, then clearly that is just. part of the contract itself.
he's in the Ossuary now, where Calivan is, so that was ... helpful. he was helping. maybe Illario really thought he was helping. he didn't expect the ship to go down. he didn't know the details of the Ossuary. he didn't know what Zara was doing or the blood vault or the demons--
really, if you think about it, this is Lucanis's fault. if he had been good enough to break out immediately, to kill Calivan right away, Zara would have never gotten her claws into him
HE was complacent. HE was overconfident. HE slipped up. this is all HIS fault because it cannot possibly be Illario's fault scheme betrayal
illario wouldn't do that he didn't know he would leAVE HIM HERE
Thinking about how confident Lucanis must’ve been at first that he was going to get out of the Ossuary when he first got there……………..
#lucanis dellamorte#illario dellamorte#and the fucked up part is that Lucanis IS half right!#Illario DIDN'T know Lucanis was still in the Ossuary (not dead)#and I personally believe Illario would NOT have left him there#arranging for your cousin's death off screen where you can't see and didn't do it and your hands stay “clean”#is so very different from condemning him to year(s) of torture and imprisonment#when it came down to it Illario couldn't even kill Caterina#not when he'd have to do it himself#not in person#not looking her in the eye#no#he never intended for any of that to happen to Lucanis#and it's so cathartic now to feel that guilt!#to APOLOGIZE#to swear to his cousin that he would have stormed the ocean itself#if he had only KNOWN he was still alive#and he means it!!#he means every word!!#(he's just not mentioning who PUT Lucanis in that situation)#(he's just ignoring that he wanted his cousin dead)#(he killed him)#(bc now he's back and he's alive and maybe it can all go back to normal??)#(minus Caterina tho and then it just spirals and spirals and SPIRALS--)
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so i beat the greater mistral on my first try. it's level 17 and im level 18, so i didnt think i would be able to (solo+nightmare).. it took more than 30 minutes, which is waaaaay too long lmao
oh but you will notice i didnt use any potions. ive got such a good set of abilities and gear that i regen a lot of health and pretty much always have a barrier up
i think my previous run (all trials active for the whole game) really ruined the way i play. that made health potions useless, so i put a lot of work into figuring out the best setup to keep my health, so now i just forget i can actually heal lmao
#personal#da#dai#after maybe 10 minutes i was like. god. this seems doable but it's gonna take forever. im am not having fun.#but like 20 minutes in i was actually enjoying it. it got fun trying to dodge the ice breath and then run underneath her (the safest place)#based on the last save i did it was 32 minutes and yeah that feels right.#ftr im not saying it was EASY. i had to be constantly moving and micromanaging my abilities and positioning. it was VERY tactical#i guess i have a tendency to only consider things *hard* if it got stressful to stay alive or if i had some deaths#i wasnt in any danger with this fight so it didnt FEEL hard but i know how much work ive put into getting my inq this solid#look at that xp tho! 10k!! i might actually get to level 20 sometime this century and get on with the main plot#oh and it actually dropped a helmet that's better than the one ive been using#i think that's mostly just an indication that i need to make a new helmet lmao. i just havent been getting good resources#because i dont want to explore the amount that i would need to to get decent amounts. ive just been buying out the black emporium
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Yandere BatFam x other dimension Reader.
SYPNOSIS: In another world they did love you.
IMP: Reader did get neglected in her dimension.

You've never been a figure or anything important, not something worth the light. Even in picture everybody looked so good and you're just there, even just from a glance it's hard to notice you.
You've tried to shine to take that light everybody else have in their grip but the light was purposefully avoiding you.
No amount of grade, beauty or perfection would make you their baby. Someone they cared for.
You weren't some star like them just the black sheep, everybody else have a life they can call theirs but your life was already written out for you, every possible things already carved out by everyone else but yourself.
Unlike Dick you weren't charming or good looking everything about him was amazing and admirable... The first Robin and the first to become their own person. Not even Bruce get to curve his story...
He treat his siblings equally, that was what he preached... It was true. You weren't a family to him, you didn't matter enough to be apart of his family.
Even when Jason decided to started killing you stayed by his side, brought him food and even tried to build an actual relationship but it was no use.
Everybody called you desperate for crawling to him when he needed somebody and the moment he healed(kind of) he throw you away. Ignoring how you were the only one who stood up for him, took all the insult and humiliation for his sake yet he took you for granted.
You took the word, hit and almost got disowned, for somebody who doesn't even care. You almost died for somebody you thought was your brother yet he didn't do shit when the family almost disowned you for staying by his side... Didn't offer home or solace. Just ignored your suffering for his sake.
Tim was smart everything you adore in a brother, stayed by his side spent sleepless nights just to watch over him when he was in the hospital, trying your best to support your brother who you fear might die.
Yes, everyone didn't get enough sleep but you didn't even sleep stayed by his side to make sure no harm could happened to him. Took your time to read book's knowing he can't even hear you, doing everything.
Yet when he opened his eyes he hugged the family and not you, even have the audacity to ask you to go out while they had some 'family' catch up...
Damian was one hell of a monster, yet you never gave up on him. He was just a kid and you wanted to be the admirable older siblings you never had.
It wasn't easy it never was, the constant lie about you to everyone and yes nobody in this world pity you enough to hear your side... Yout life was already hell and it wad just unfair how everybody else got what they wished for and you never get anything... Not even a family.
To the eyes of the media you were the black sheep often left out even in family portraits or any major Wayne gala, just some avarage citizen that was living the life...
Bruce couldn't remember your name's at times blaming it on old age, Alfred only saw you as an extra mouth nothing more nothing less.
Even when The joker kidnapped you and made Bruce choose between you and Catwoman he almost hesitate, you were never the first or second, you weren't an option to everybody... Just some extras living with them to make them look better.
Being you was painful itself, when your family who were supposed to be the hero rejected your presence.
So, when you accidentally step into another dimension you became attached.
Your false family loved you to no ends, you were dead in that universe... Dying a gruesome death.
Yet when they saw you alive even tho you weren't their family they cherished you and most importantly treat you like a family.
There was no more I no more threats just a loving family.
Who will do whatever to make you stay.
"I like this" You told them, you couldn't help but smile.
You've never played games with your actual family before, to them you were an actual bot with nothing interesting.
"Oh, you won't like it for long... I'll beat you"
Tim said as he aggressively nudge at you to make you lose control.
"Hey! That's cheating, someone take him out!"
Barbara stood up for you.
"Everything is fair in games... As long as you're the winner"
Damian speak up as he instinctively grab Tim hoodie and cover his eyes with it. To let you win.
"That's cheating! I should have won"
"Everything is fair in games... Just gotta have the right support"
You couldn't help it, everybody were together. You were finally in the picture, you didn't have to fit in they just have to accept you and they absolutely did.
You couldn't help but tear up, your heart aching slightly.
"Little wing are you okay? Should w-"
Dick spoke before he was cut off by Damian.
"Let's beat up Tim, he made them cry"
"Huh?! Im the one that lost... Your violence towards me make them scared!"
Before anyone else could argue on who made you cry Jason who was just there because of you spoke up.
"Don't be so obnoxious and loud... They're obviously emotional for a good reason. Bunch of wannabe adult in this room"
With that said he would gave you this handkerchief which was very unusual of him.
Taking a seat next to you on the ground as he pick up the extra controller, not even weirded out by your suddenly burst of tears just pure understanding.
Your Jason was the one who kick you aside the moment he felt healed but this one... He was trying his best to comfort you, he didn't like to be so upfront yet he was doing this to save you from embarassment and a little comfort.
Looking at the Handkerchief you couldn't help but smile, the same one you gave to your Jason when he came back but the one you made was burned into crispy by the very person you made for. He took it and throw it inside the crumbling building that was ignited into flames by him.
Called it a waste of fabric and time, not worth his precious time or life even tho you spend weeks stitching everything by hand... You just wanted to encourage him to be better you didn't knew he would take offence to your kindness.
There was some holes on the handkerchief yet it was extremely clean and ironed... He seems to cherish it alot.
"Took it everywhere and I ruined it, it was my lucky charm but you're here now so you'll be a good replacement"
"I don't think being compared to a literal fabric is fulfilling"
Duke commented.
"It's not just a fabric it's made by our beloved sibling here, shame on you Duke, shame on you"
Stephanie tease him with a fake offended look.
"They only made it for Jaybird... Im abit upse- Very upset"
Dick decided to bring another reason to start a full on war again.
"Hey! I want one but with our special logo!"
"This is childish, but I need one for a good purpose"
"Im the oldest so I should be first"
"Want one"
"Enough!"
Bruce spoke up, seems like all the arguing had finally went into his brain.
"As your Father... I am first priority"
"Master Bruce, as your somewhat father I must be the first I insist"
This was what family should be, united and happy. One that are willing to be by yourside even at your worst, willing to take the hit with you and just be ourselves to eachother without shame.
While you were finally getting the life you deserved your actual family were crumbling. Trying to find you, turning every nook and crook up side down.
Gotham was turning into literal hell, they were acting like dog hound pounding onto anyone who they assume have information on your whereabouts.
It seems like they have finally realised your worth. But you've already replaced them.
You were slowly healing but too bad they won't tolerate being replaced.

Watch me flop.
#x reader#fanfiction#fanfic#fiction#dc x reader#jason todd x you#dick grayson x you#short fanfic#tim drake x you#jason todd x reader#yandere batfamily x reader#yandere batboys#yandere jason todd#yandere dc#yandere dc x reader#dc x y/n#batfamily x neglected reader#batfam x neglected reader#x neglected reader#neglected reader#damian wayne x reader#dc x you#yandere batfam#batfam x batsis#batfam x reader#batfamily x reader#yandere fiction#dc fanfic#dc fanfiction#dc characters
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I shouldn’t do this here because this is the “no marketing” website and I want it to stay that way but… I have just snuck into the realm of traditional publishing and my weird book about assassins (aka The Murder Siblings TM) focusing on stupid jokes, sword fights, masked balls, 🏳️🌈gay sex🏳️🌈, mental health issues, and rebelling against the rich isn’t being seen in the jungle of hetero TikTok picks and Sarah J Maas books. (Even tho it’s been sold as Six of Crows meets The Princess Bride.)
If Snowblooded doesn’t start getting noticed by people, I think my career in trad pub might be over just as it started. So during this our pride month could I perchance ask you to signal boost this post to support a lesbian and poly author trying to break in to the trad pub jungle? (Also, the book can be bought HERE )
Blurb:
Valour and Petrichor are esteemed members of the Order of Axsten, an assassin’s guild tasked with keeping order in the rough city of Vinterstock. Plucked from the streets as children and raised to compete for their guild’s approval, Valour uses her brawn to survive, while Petrichor strives to be a gentleman assassin. When they’re given their biggest job yet—to kill Brandquist, the mysterious leader of the city's illegal magic trade—it’s a recipe for disaster. If they can quell their rivalry long enough, the reward will be enough to settle their debts with the Order and start new lives.
If this job wasn’t dangerous enough, Valour is saddled with looking after a famed hotelier, Ingrid Rytterdahl. Valour finds her dangerously attractive, but the aspec Petrichor can’t wait to be rid of them both. He begrudgingly accepts Ingrid’s knowledge and connections as they navigate the city’s criminal underbelly in pursuit of Brandquist.
As secrets bubble to the surface, the duo must outwit the thugs on their tail, keep Ingrid alive, and—hardest of all—work together without murdering each other.
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This eposide was insane I think i actually need to watch it again-
"I like you better when you're sad."-Jaxs
"I hate you but I don't want you to hate me.' Ragtha.
'Its hard to tell Ragtha stuff because after a while its hard to tell how genuine she being'-gangle.
That eposide was insane and there was so much the ep seemed to fucking fly by-
The existential crisis Jax was going through was insane. This ep feels more like its a peak into how everyones life was before being sucked into the game. Jax is miserable, sitting in his car counting the hours down. He finally expierences the horror and his voice is mega different in this ep. I think this us the most genuine he's ever been in an ep, he even calls Pomni by their name.
I can now see why Goosework said that the Ragtha centered ep is really gonna test some folks. I have a sneaking suspicion Ragtha is hiding her "true" personality. That she truly does not like a lot of people. An instead of being like Jax who is openly antagonistic, she would rather hide it. You can see it peak out when she talking down to Gangle about how she is more responsible, counter by the fact she currently high as a kit. Ragtha use to have horses, which is giving me she was a rich horse girl in real life vibes.
Pomni and Zooble makes it out the best this ep. Pomni is trying to interact with Gummigoo "she flirting with the npc". NO SHIPS THEY SAID BUT MY SHIP IS ALIVE AND WELL GOOSEWORKS Pomni has to make a choice about Gummigoo and she chooses the people over chasing the npc. It shows how she is growing and learning to care for the people around her. Doesnt change the fact she misses him still.
Zooble is thw most interesting because they are the most down to earth. They just play the game. They have no attachment and was the much needed rock. They are stable, they even mention the only reason caine deals with them is because he likes them. So she makes sure she able to stay on his good side.
All of them get B+ at the end tho
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What about a one-shot or just a suggestive story where Shadow takes advantage of y/n?
A/n: I'm probably gonna get all the fans' attention with this one huh? I normally don't write anyone but Tails but I am making an expection for some reason today. Have a good read I guess! Idk why I write what I write today XD Sorry for the long wait.
I left you guys in a cliffhanger. hah! idk if I would continue tho
Masterlist
Pairings: Shadow x Reader
They/them // She/her // He/him // Other
Summery; Eggman made a new weapon out of Shadow. Let's see what it is
Warnings: smut, lemon, suggestive themes, blood, marking, biting, tearing flesh, attempted rape
Word Count: 1371
Btw does anyone want to be in the tag list?
As your eyes flickered over him in fear, you were instantly struck by the sharp and scary aura emanating from his breathtaking violet eyes. Shadow stood before you, his chest heaving rapidly as if he had just completed a long and demanding marathon. His fur was damp, drenched in sweat, and his claws peeked out menacingly from his gloves. His fangs were visible, adding to the unnerving sight that confronted you. But what puzzled you most was the absence of any evidentiary explanation for his condition, except for one haunting phrase that echoed in your mind.
"What do you think is the most natural instinct of an animal, the most wild and scary one?" Eggman's voice resonated in your head, reminding you of his words moments ago. "Their bloodlust? Hunger to stay alive? Maybe. But there is something else that is much *more* dangerous and entertaining. 'The will to do anything to death for their mate.' "
The memory of Eggman's sinister revelation half an hour ago flooded your mind. You hadn't expected this game of catch to turn into something so disturbing. Though you had managed to catch your breath, your heart still raced uncontrollably, struggling to make sense of the unsettling situation unfolding before you.
Your eyes widened in fear as Shadow took deliberate steps toward you, raising the possibility of him falling victim to Eggman's trap, turning against his friends. A sense of terror gripped you, leaving you feeling trapped with no way to escape. Desperately, you scanned your surroundings, searching for an exit, but found nothing. You found yourself backed into a dead end.
"And to mate, of course." Your throat tightened as you heard Eggman's words reverberating in your mind. The realization struck you like a bolt of lightning—Shadow was hungry, thirsty for you. Eggman's twisted plans had successfully turned him, and now the true extent of Shadow' instincts became clear. No, this couldn't be true. Shadow wouldn't do this to you, would he? The shocking dishonor of Eggman's manipulation left you bewildered, unable to fathom the torment inflicted upon your friends.
"C-come on, Shadow. This isn't you," you started nervously, your voice shaking. "We both know that you don't wanna do this. Behave yourself! Think logically, like you always do! We're still in Eggman's base. He's playing with you, with your mind, your instincts! You are the ultimate life form, damn it! You can't just succumb to Eggman like that! There are Badniks running around, and if they find us, we're finished-"
Your plea was interrupted as Shadow forcefully pinned both his hands beside your head, a whimper left your lips in fear. A deep snarl escaping his lips as you attempted to slide away. Trapped between him and the wall, you realized the extent of his transformation. No longer the loyal companion you once knew, he approached you with predatory purpose, garnered by one sole instinct—breeding. You were left with a terrifying decision. Would you become the first to fall at his hands before the Badniks got to you?
After examining his prey's frightened face for a while, Shadow slowly lowered himself, his nose skimming along your neck. His actions mirrored those of a true animal, inhaling your scent as his salivating mouth revealed his primal desire for your presence. The sensation of his warm breath against your skin sent shivers down your spine, intensifying the horrifying nature of the situation.
Attempting to muster the strength to push him away, you fought against his grip, but his strength surpassed anything you could have imagined. Like an iron vice, his grasp held firm, rendering your efforts fruitless. In spite of the predicament you found yourself in, you couldn't help but be mesmerized by Shadow' well-built form, his muscles flexing in the most hypnotic manner.
You quickly shook away such distracting thoughts, forcing yourself to concentrate on finding a way out of this nightmare. Every fiber of your being screamed for escape as Shadow began to suckle at your neck and shoulder, exhaling his hot breath in sporadic bursts. The sounds he made only served to further ignite the blazing heat that reddened your face, flooding you with a mix of desire and terror.
Suppressing a moan, you desperately struggled to redirect your focus, your mind racing for an escape plan. Yet, how could you concentrate on anything other than the overpowering dominance Shadow exhibited? Pressed against the wall by his scorching body, each breath and moan he emitted only served to remind you of the pleasure he was experiencing.
Amidst his sloppy kisses and teasing nibbles, you fought fiercely against the sensations threatening to consume you, trying to maintain your composure. However, as Shadow momentarily eased the pressure of his body against yours, he replaced it with his leg pressed against your groin, effectively preventing any escape. The mix of pain and pleasure elicited a whine from your lips, pushing Shadow to suckle at your shoulder with renewed vigor.
Finally, he got bored and withdrew from his sloppy territory. The room grew suffocatingly silent as he moved his fangs along your throat, gently biting a few places, feeling your heartbeat increasing. He licked his lips and shifted his attention to your other shoulder, leaving a trail of kisses and sucking hungrily, leaving little marks. But it seemed like that wasn't enough for him anymore; he growled, as if yearning for something more primal.
With his fingers deeply entwined in your hair, he pulled, causing you to gasp, displaying your neck like a plate of meal to him. Without warning, he sank his teeth into your shoulder, his fangs piercing through your skin. Tears slipped from your eyes as you cried out in pain. He let your arms go and held you tightly from your waist, as you gripped his back for support. You closed your eyes, gritting your teeth, and unwillingly scratched his back in pain. It felt as though his teeth were digging deeper into your shoulder, testing your limits.
Shadow let out a pleasured sigh through his nose, not yet satisfied. He continued biting harder than before, his eyes closed as he let out an animalistic growl. The realization that he could break your neck in half if he wanted sent a shiver through your spine. He sucked your blood with such thirst leaving you weak as you sobbed silently, drinking and swallowing it all as if he hadn't had a drop in weeks.
Before things grew any wilder, he pulled back, a string of blood and saliva still connecting the two of you. Panting for air, he tried to lick all the blood flowing from his mouth with his tongue, his breath hot against your face. Your blood flowed from your shoulder to your chest.
Satisfied with the mark he left on you, Shadow now went for your lips. Gripping your form, he forced his lips onto yours, connecting them. You hesitated, not wanting to taste the disgusting blend of your blood and his saliva. He pulled your hair once again, and when you whimpered in pain, he immediately seized the opportunity and engaged in a fierce kiss, taking your breath away.
Your heart raced as his hand wandered across your body in a manner both unnerving and inquisitive. He marked his territory, staking claim to every inch of your being. Your mind battled to comprehend the situation, as your body responded to his predatory touch.
Fighting the rising panic, you summoned your inner strength you managed to wrap your arms around his shoulders in a desperate attempt to distract him. As your lips collided in a feverish kiss, you hoped to manipulate the situation to your advantage.
To your surprise, he welcomed your advances. He tilted his head, letting out a low, carnal moan. Sensing that this could be your one chance to regain control, you decided to play along. You pushed aside your feelings of self-disgust and harnessed your newfound determination.
As you passionately kissed, your mind churned, searching for an escape plan. With each stolen moment, you became acutely aware of his animalistic nature, his primal desires, and his desperate need to assert dominance. Yet, instead of submitting to the imminent danger, an idea began to form in your mind.
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic characters#allenwrites#sonic#shadow x reader#shadow#shadow the ultimate lifeform#shadow the hedgehog#sonic x reader#sonic the hedgehog x reader#shadow the hedghog fanart#shadow the hedgehog x reader
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Where It Hurts The Most (joel miller x reader)
Plot: Abby swears she only wants Joel dead—until she sees how much she means to him. Blinded by grief and rage, she changes her plan, targeting her instead. Joel powerless to stop the fallout is forced to watch as Abby wants him to feel the same crushing loss she once did.
Warnings: violence, blood, torture
A/N: I know Abby mentions multiple times that she only wants Joel BUT this idea came to mind and yet again i can do whatever the fuck i want SO yeah !! i hope you like this new twisted idea, joel is alive tho so that counts for something, right? RIGHT??
The ski lodge reeked of blood and gunpowder.
Joel's breathing was ragged as he struggled against the ropes biting into his wrists. Blood slicked his side — Abby hadn’t wasted time. When they'd first dragged him in, she'd made sure to beat him half to death, cracking ribs, splitting his brow, breaking him down piece by piece.
He didn’t know if the pool beneath him was mostly his or someone else's.
Ellie’s muffled screams and Dina’s frantic shouts echoed around the wooden beams of the cabin, but Joel’s focus was locked on one thing: you, forced to your knees before Abby, bruised and bloodied.
"I was just going to kill him," Abby said, voice trembling with rage as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Quick. Clean."
From across the room, Owen stepped forward, hesitation thick in his voice. "Abby — this isn’t what we talked about. We came for Joel. Just Joel."
"Yeah," Manny added warily, shifting his weight, his rifle lowering slightly. "Don't make this messier."
Abby barely heard them. She glanced down at you — saw the way your eyes, swollen and bloodshot, still searched for Joel — and her expression twisted into something dark, something cruel.
"But that’s not enough anymore," she muttered.
Joel jerked against his bonds so violently the chair scraped loudly against the floor. "You fuckin’ touch her, I swear to God—" His voice broke into a growl, hoarse and burning from the earlier beating.
Abby laughed, cold and hollow. "You’re gonna watch, Joel. You’re gonna feel everything I felt when you killed my father."
"No!" Ellie screamed, fighting against the arms pinning her down. "Please — please, don't!"
Abby barely glanced at her before turning back to you. She grabbed you roughly by the collar, yanking you closer. You didn’t cry, didn’t beg — you just kept your eyes on Joel.
Trying to be strong for him.
The first punch landed hard, sending your head snapping back. Joel bellowed your name, straining so hard that blood seeped from his wrists where the rope cut into his skin.
Another blow. And another.
Joel was roaring, begging, his voice hoarse and broken. Ellie was sobbing, Dina trying to twist free from the guards holding her.
"I’m gonna kill you!" Joel swore, voice cracking. "I’m gonna rip you apart!"
But Abby didn’t stop — not until your body slumped, weak and trembling, against the floorboards.
Joel’s vision blurred — from blood, from rage, from helplessness — until he heard it: Gunshots.
The door to the lodge slammed open, splintering against the wall.
Tommy burst inside, rifle raised, already firing. Behind him, Jackson patrols flooded the lodge like a tide — someone must have sent a signal.
The room exploded into chaos — gunfire, screaming, bodies scrambling for cover.
Joel didn’t think. He tore at the ropes until the chair tipped over, smashing against the floor. He rolled, gasping, side burning, and his hands �� bloody and half-numb — finally found freedom.
He crawled to you, heart thundering so loud he couldn't hear anything else.
"Baby—" His hands cradled your face, sticky with blood and too cold. "No, no, stay with me. Look at me."
You blinked sluggishly, pupils slow to respond — but you were alive.
"Joel," you whispered, voice cracked and broken, but so alive it made him choke on a sob.
"I got you," he rasped, pressing his forehead against yours. "You're okay, baby. You’re okay."
Ellie and Dina were suddenly there too, shielding you as Tommy’s voice barked orders across the lodge.
And then Joel heard it — a sharp yell, a struggle — and through the broken beams of the lodge, he saw Abby trying to escape, blood trailing from a wound at her side. She shoved past a patrolman, frantic.
Tommy didn't hesitate.
One clean shot rang out.
Abby stumbled, then crumpled to the floor without a sound.
Joel stared — not with triumph, not even with hatred — just with a hollow, aching finality. She would never hurt anyone again.
The fight moved outside. The lodge grew quieter, except for your shallow breathing and Joel’s broken prayers.
Ellie clung to your side, Dina pressing cloth to your wounds, and Joel held you like he could will you whole again — ignoring the searing pain in his ribs, the way blood trickled down his temple.
Maybe he couldn't undo the pain Abby had caused. Maybe nothing would ever be the same.
But you were alive. And for Joel Miller, that was enough to keep fighting.
#joel miller x reader#joel x reader#joel miller#the last of us#the last of us fanfic#joel miller fanfic
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Jack still sort of maintaining a relationship with Roy the first few years after Haley dies (Aaron thought it was important to maintain those connections for Jack even tho it hurt Aaron to do 😭 it was easy with Jess who he loves but SUCKED with Roy) but he gets extremely exclusionary once Ellie is born. Him being like “I will spend time with MY grandson who belonged to MY daughter but I will not be wasting my time, energy, and money on a child you’ve had with another woman. A child who – might I point out – would not have been born if you stayed married to my daughter and didn’t get her killed in the first place.”
Aaron being pissed on Ellie’s behalf (and his feelings are hurt tbh) and you being pissed on both of their behalfs. But, unexpectedly, Hc that Jack overheard this conversation and basically says to Aaron the next time Roy wants to take him somewhere (Aaron didn’t want to make HIM feel bad on top of everything else by banning him from seeing his grandfather, so he was gonna let him go), “I don’t want to spend time with grandpa Roy if he’s gonna be mean to Ellie. Thank you, but I’ll stay here.” SUCH A GOOD BIG BROTHERRRRR you and Aaron are so proud 🥺❤️
OHHH MY GOD??
roy just completely refuses to acknowledge that ellie exists 😭
it happened right from the start: when aaron shared the two of you were expecting, roy brushed it off, muttering something incoherently in response. after she's born, aaron invites him over for family dinners, he refuses to come. he's invited to ellie's first, second, third birthday party, doesn't come. every time he comes over, he acts like he's never seen her before. disregarding her completely.
it becomes very clear very fast that he wants to spend time with jack and jack only. as much as aaron hates to admit it, in a way, he understands. roy's bitter about what happened to haley, so this was somewhat expected. it's a different situation that's hard to navigate - ellie isn't related to him, so if roy doesn't want to bring her along to places, whatever, aaron's not going to force roy to do anything. the issue is what an issue it is. how ellie is being treated.
it's more of a problem when ellie is a bit older, and wants to tag along with jack wherever he goes. she just wants to be included 🥺 sweet ellie simply says hi when roy comes over to pick up jack, he ignores her. the next time, she draws him a picture, and he doesn't accept it.
aaron gently confronts him, and that's when roy brings up haley and how this child is a disgrace to her. imagine he full-on admits he wishes she never existed?? 😭 ellie's a product of what happened to haley, he'll never forgive aaron for getting her killed, so he'll never accept this child's existence. she shouldn't exist.
that angers aaron and he starts going off - ellie is a part of this family, whether you like it or not. and fine, you don't have to love her (saying that SHATTERS aaron's heart) but do not treat her like she's nothing. aaron won't let that stand.
it starts a huge argument 🥺 roy refuses speak to aaron, except when it comes to arranging his time with jack, and the conversation is very short at that. he doesn't speak much to you either (never has). again in his eyes - you're haley's replacement. jack's new "mom"
and it's especially sad because ellie knows about haley too :( - not the story, but the simple, good things: jack has another mommy, she's not here with us anymore but you can talk to her with a candle. haley has never been a avoided topic in the house, she's encouraged. and so ellie loves haley in her own way :( so to call her a disgrace in haley's name?? when she's also keeping haley's memory alive? :((((
you feel awful. you know how hurt aaron is but he doesn't allow himself to show it. he hates talking about it, and he's always in a mood whenever roy's with jack. you feel awful for your daughter who doesn't know what's going on. you feel awful for jack who's taking an unnecessary weight on his shoulders in terms of this too.
ellie's confused and upset, this is the first person who's ever shown her unkindness. aaron gently tries to explain, but also, how do you explain this to a toddler? so he simply apologizes and scoops her up into his arms and holds her close :( he feels awful, and as if he's failing her in someway. this is "his fault", isn't it? 😭
so if roy's taking jack out, aaron or you, or both combined, take ellie out for the day to do something fun. or try to keep jack heading out on the down-low. it sucks, you still both encourage jack to spend time with his grandfather - maintaining that important relationship - even though it's exceedingly complicated behind the scenes.
and jack, being the sweet sensitive kid he is, picks up on the tension immediately. and he's torn 🥺 he wants to appease his grandfather, knows what he's doing isn't right, but also doesn't want to betray his little sister, letting behavior like this continue. he feels guilty :( he takes the initiative and brings it up to roy himself, asking if ellie can come with them someday, like to the zoo or to a movie. but roy's pretty level-headed and his mind is made up - absolutely no ellie.
so jack gets really upset :( he gets home one day and cries about it :((( you're trying to console him, as is aaron (who's close to tears himself), and ellie wanders over :( she gets sad whenever jack is sad :( and while she has no idea what's going on exactly, she just buries herself right up into jack's side as he's crying. to comfort him too 🥺🫶🏻
overall it's a reallyyyy messy situation, one that you can only hope resolves with time :(
#ellie hotchner <3#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#aaron hotchner imagine#criminal minds imagine#jack hotchner#aaron hotchner drabble#criminal minds drabble
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